#ALL DAY IT HAS BEEN PLAYING IN MY HEAD HELPPP

[xjumbled-up-brainx]

ALL DAY

ALL DAY LONG

So I recently convinced one of my friends to watch Octonauts I will convert them all >:)

I started her off with Operation Cooperation cause it’s one of my favorites. I knew she would like it cause we are a group of 12 gays with our 1 token straight friend. First off she said she agrees Kwaston is gold and they are in love. <333

Then she said the second episode was really cute too. When I recommended it I forgot what the second half was. There are a lot of cute episodes so I was like huh? “The little song…with the flamingoes”

[torhues]

miya atsumu.

w : female reader, mentions of pregnancy, somewhat emotional idk, tsum makes his entry at the end but we still talk ab him throughout this helppp

faint aroma of the thyme tea resting in front of you keeps you from getting bored while waiting for atsumu. it's not that he has left you somewhere alone, in fact you're at his mother's place, but you still wish he would come home a bit early, especially since the weather is getting cold as the sunset caves in.

a part of you wants to discard the tea.

"are you nervous?" atsumu's mother— your mother-in-law, of course, interjects just when you were about to get up from the chair.

"sort of," your fingers dance around the hem of your dress, a lazy smile fluttering on your lips; amidst the cold winds, you find comfort within the warmth provided by the minimal sunlight offered by the setting sun. "i wonder if i'll be a good mother,"

it's the fifth time you're visiting your mother-in-law throughout your seven month long pregnancy, though you wished you could just stay at her place for the rest of the time left. something about her presence makes you forget all of your worries, even if it's just for a few minutes. she resembles a mentor, despite being your husband's mom, while on other days, you see glimpses of your mother in her eyes.

"how was it, raising 'tsum and osamu?" the question slips off your tongue before you even know it. you've been thinking of asking her for a while now, thinking, nothing more, before the words decide to escape on their own, knowing you would never voice them out.

"i don't know," it's an indifferent reply, you think. perhaps, you anticipated something more, something that would give you an insight into motherhood, but she doesn't spare you a glance, continuing to arrange the photo albums and frames. "i had them when i was quite young, and was scared i would do something wrong, that i wouldn't know when they are hungry. i was scared of all the worst scenarios i had in my head but, when i held them in my arms for the first time, i was relieved. i didn't know how i'll do it, but i knew it would be fine,"

there's a photo frame on the corner table with a picture of the twins in her arms. you've seen it a lot of times, often pointing out how different atsumu looked back then, even if it's only reasonable, while admiring them the other times. you've imagined yourself in her place— with your twins in your arms and atsumu by your side. looking through the photo album earlier, you had pictured yourself with your kids, thinking about all the things you would do to give them a memorable childhood.

all the concerns and plans you had, without a doubt, made you nervous.

"i thought, i wouldn't do things right," she continues, hands busy with cleaning all the frames that had captured atsumu and osamu's childhood together. "but, one look at them and i'd know what they need. it was like a miracle, to wake up from sleep exactly when they were hungry, or needed me to change their diapers. i think it's something you get after becoming a mother,"

and most of the people have told you the same, even your own mom. you're scared, but behind your fear, you imagine atsumu with his twins, doing everything that him and osamu did as children. you picture your kids wearing matching pajamas like any other siblings. at some point in future, you image them cooking with their father, perhaps an outdoor barbeque, since atsumu loves it.

you image atsumu teaching them volleyball and playing with them every evening. you already know he would be on cloud nine the moment they start praising him for being such an amazing volleyball player. you image going to little picnic dates with your family, or maybe, to the beach during the summers, making sand castles and playing by the shore. you image atsumu sleeping on the couch with your kids at noon after a tiring day at morning practice.

you imagine your kids holding onto atsumu's fingers while trying to walk, ultimately taking their first steps that make him burst into tears. you imagine him taking them to grocery stores and buy them every candy they lay their eyes upon— which is a little too much but the atsumu you know would do that. he would do anything for the two mini him-and-you running around the house, and you would too, without any compromises.

"was it hard raising them?" you ask again, this time with more interest in hearing her experience as a mother, or maybe, you simply wanted to hear about things atsumu and osamu did that kids.

"a little, but again, it's not easy to handle kids," her lips curl into a smile before they morph into a slight frown, "but atsumu gave me a hard time,"

"he would start crying the moment i took my eyes off him, always being able to find chocolates no matter where i hid them. you might not believe, but atsumu was somewhat of a shy kid to begin with. while osamu would make friends at the playground, he would hide behind his father,"

osamu once told you how in middle school, atsumu had the hardest time making friends because the two of them were assigned different classes. other times, osamu would introduce atsumu to his friends, but middle school taught him to depend on himself rather than having someone else to lean upon all the time, and made him into who he is right now.

it was hard to believe that the atsumu you know, miya atsumu, the one who has such a bit mouth, was once introverted. he's someone who announced it in the whole school when you became his girlfriend in middle school, the one who announced his marriage to you on twitter account before even talking to PR team and got scolded about it, the one who threw a party when he found out he was going to become a dad.

"gosh, i feel sad now," her words pull you out of your thoughts as a slight wave of guilt dwelled upon your shoulders for not focusing on her words and being lost in your own world.

you shift a little closer to her, "mom, did something happen?"

and silence is all you receive as a response. you notice the dull grimace masking her face, one that makes her someone so unknown because no matter the situation, she has always been the person to smile the brightest amidst a crowd.

"time flies by so quickly," she chuckles softly, "it feels like yesterday, he was a kid toddling around me all the time, and now, he's about to become a dad,"

between silence and fleeting steps of nostalgia in the room, you hear the door click, and the next thing you know is atsumu has returned from his little gathering with highschool friends. the room doesn't feel lonely anymore, and maybe it's because of his presence that's loud in itself, or the way he crouches in front of you, smiling at your belly and telling his kids how much he has missed them, and that he wouldn't leave them alone with you for hours ever again in case they grow more liking to you.

you could hear distance city noises as the night caved in, and by the time osamu came back, you had been planning to depart. although, a part of you wishes you could stay with them a little longer, you know atsumu shouldn't miss his practice since he's already planning to take a long leave once the twins are born; and there's no way he's leaving you at his mother's place all alone.

"so, what did you and mom talk about?" he asks, breaking the comforting silence that has been accompanying you through the car ride.

"not much," you slide your phone inside your purse, "just tales about how much of a trouble you were to your mom," atsumu laughs bitterly, and it's just a show because by this time, he knows that leaving you alone with his mom would result in discussions about his childhood. stories will be shared and secrets will be spilled, and atsumu would rather watch a soap opera than have his own mother tell you the embarrassing stuff he did as a kid.

you steal a glance at him. both osamu and atsumu are splitting images of their father, from tip to toe, but atsumu has his mother's eyes. perhaps, it's too late for you to notice this now, and maybe, he would be salty that you never noticed this, because he has always taken pride in resembling his mother, even if it's in just one feature.

"remember when you asked me if you would be a good father?" you slide your hands in atsumu's, wiping off all the doubts that have been seeping through his fingers, "our kids can't have a better dad, tsum,"

[here2bbtstrash]

So this is how it started…..

And I REALLY was like, doing my homework with this chapter

And clearly couldn’t keep up with the deep analysis, chp 8 got better and better (as expected 🥹)and.. ok I’ll proceed to rant whatever thought is left on my MESSED UP BRAIN… ok they were bonding and taking care of eo meals SO AWKWARDLY??? Lmao like ok here’s some coffee and some gross sweet shit, idk eat it if y want idc *proceeds to drop it and walking away* also AB written on the cup my god you’re a fucking genius ily so much jajajajajjjjajajajajajaajj

And pls I love how she’s so confused about him and instead of unpack her thoughts with the BEST BSF JIMINIE MY BELOVED she’s like “ok imma go fuck him,yeah that’ll make everything more clear (no judging her tho like WHO WOULDNT ITS FUCKING MIN YOONGI)

“Is this a booty call” I KNEW HE’D BE THE ONE TO SAY THAT pls he’s so annoying!!!! and hot!

And ofc… they’re bonding in the best way: ✨trauma✨ but seriously I loved the way they skipped unnecessary and cliché comfort words, just listening eo🥹💜 (and OMG the whiskey scene from the vliveeee I’m a psychic like jiminie lol)

The smooooth “want a tour?” just to end up in his bedroom 😏

But it was the first time they took their time 😭😭😭 the first time seeing eo naked😭😭 THEY FINALLY KISSED !!!!!! These bitches were starving!!

“You’re not the only one with great head game” 🆘🆘 helppp🚨police‼️🚨🚨 him making her squirrrttttt 😫🤯and I’m going to stop with the smut scenes bc if I’m going to say what I liked I might as well re-write the entire scene, so I’ll just say that I came the hardest ever and had to take some time bc I was FED yes in red bc I don’t know how to emphasize how good your smut is you’re a goddess 😫❤️‍🔥 and what is it with you and showers scenes??? Why/how are they so good and soft and hot at the same time 🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋

They being awkward the next few days? Mhmm nothing new GROW UP MORONS but also don’t?? I’m enjoying the drama what can I say🤭

AS FOR MY BABY STAR CANDY🥺THE AUDACITY😠 I’ll expect an apology with tears and lots of banana milks😤😤 come here baby I’ll cuddle you while playing with your piercings, run my hands trough your beautiful hair and show you the funniest tiktoks🥺💜🫂 I mean I understand her bc she’s so fucking confused and so fucking paranoid! But In love with her or not he’s just looking out for her, ffs why the fuck she went so hard on him😫😫 but I’ll trust the process🥺

Wheeeeewwwwww This didn’t feel like 15k at alllll it was so good that I read it in a heartbeat 😂 I think this is my fav chapter so far!! Idek how to end this review but just know that you blew my mind again and I love you M💜 you’re amazing!!!!!! Te amo bebé can’t wait to see what the future hold for these two 😍

sfkjdglsdfgjslg I APPRECIATE THE EFFORT 🥺 it's my fault that this chapter was a million years long and i decided to shove pivotal moments in every 2 seconds like i cannot IMAGINE anyone trying to comment on every single thing 🤣 we'd be here all day!!!!

NOT YOU ROASTING THEM FOR BONDING AWKWARDLY LMAOOOOOO listen 🥴 it's their first time being nice they don't know how to do this shit!!!! like uhhhhh here have some food guess i don't hate you all the time alright gotta go 🏃‍♀️ and yessss the AB on the cup!!!! i just had to stick a little callback in there (what am i talking about i stuck so many callbacks in this chapter for no reason sdkfjsldf)

she's such a dummy it's true 🤦‍♀️ your bestie who has been telling you this shit over and over is RIGHT THERE and instead you're???? gonna fuck your feelings away????? ma'am??????? and ofc yoongi had to call her out on it 😏

sdfkfhdgjd YOU ARE PSYCHIC THO !!! you literally sent me that ask the day i drafted that whiskey and trauma bonding scene and i was like 👀 SHE HAS NO IDEA..... 🤭

LMAO THEY RLY WERE STARVING.... my god...... fucking in a private place in a bed for once, can you even believe 😩 and LOL NOT THE HIGHEST FORM OF PRAISE 🙇‍♀️ i had sooooo much fun writing this smut and letting these two dummies finally be a SMIDGE intimate 🫠 also wow now that i think of it i have literally written 3 shower moments in a row lately am i ??? okay ???? what's going on with me

and of course the piss poor communication strikes again.... both between yoongi and reader and with 😭 baby goth 😭 dog dad 😭 didn't deserve this.....

i really really appreciate you calling out reader's state of mind and taking that into consideration tho 💜 i see a lot of people SUPER angry about how she handled it (which, FINE!!! she did it BAD! REAL BAD!) but at the same time - she is not doing well y'all 🤣 that adrenaline rush of thinking she's getting caught is REAL, and she's swimming in her own denial (and i would argue, so was jk 🤭) and a whole lot of hurt/weird yoongi feelings sooooo yes. she fucked up and went aggro on him 😭 but i promise they're gonna work it out ❤️‍🩹

omggggg the favorite chapter so far?!?!?! gahhhh what an honor 🙇‍♀️ i was super scared about posting bc 1. this chapter is fucking THICC lol and 2. it's got so much to it! so many changes!! shit is ramping UP!!!! so it means so much to know you really enjoyed it 🥺 eeeee i love you so much jaz i'm so glad you're enjoying this wild ride!!! GRAMMYS ARE NEXT HERE WE FUCKING GOOOOO 💜

[shoichee]

okok hc or fic: reader was teiko’s “head” manager(?) and her talent was being a medic (if someone gets injured they’re back on the court in under a minute type thing) and training plans. suddenly momoi’s talent blooms, she starts working w/ everyone in the team (+ reader’s crush akashi) and people think she’s a better manager than reader. because of this, she overworks + collapses in front of her best friends kuroko + kise (don’t let akashi know yet i have plans for that 👀)

HELLO? YES OFFICER? I JUST FOUND A BANGER REQUEST RIGHT HERE? YOUR BRAIN IS SO BIG AND SEXY IVE BEEN DYING TO WRITE THIS🏃🏻‍♀️💨 part 2 here and part 3 here AND update: part 4 here

Akashi x Reader

[Teiko!manager Headcanons]

you had a knack of being a natural chiropractor in loosening up tense muscles instantly (for more fluid play) or easily putting in back dislocated joints

basically you have crackhands

in your free time as a hobby and a job as the “head manager” (that Akashi announced to the team himself), you’d often bury yourself in anatomy studies and gym plans on the internet and databases to review over Akashi’s team training routines to see if they were effective and safe; oftentimes, you’d return back with improved plans, and as time went on, Akashi entrusted you with creating the plans yourself completely

you took on the job so eagerly to impress the Teiko captain, if you were being honest to yourself

your enthusiasm even inspires Momoi, Teiko’s other manager, to work harder

no one in Teiko knows physiology better than you, and as expected, it was also your best subject along with health

Kise often looks at you in horror and respect at how you don’t cringe/flinch at the loud cracks resonating across the room or court when players come to you for instant relief (the origin story of how he came to call you (y/n)-cchi was the very fact that you manage to put back his dislocated shoulder in 3 seconds flat one game)

when Kuroko first joined the 1st-string, he was a walking magnet for injuries, and you ended up being there for him every single time… nosebleeds? check. sprained ankle? check. nausea from over exhaustion? check.

both you and Kuroko relish in the fact that everyone in the team can never understand how the both of you do some incredible things with your hands

both of you being quite dexterous, you both often teach each other your specialties for fun; it’s almost shocking to see Kuroko effortlessly loosening up a stress knot and you pulling off a well-done palm pass

you admit, you do juggle a lot of responsibilities… from being a makeshift nurse, to a chiropractor, to a budget gym coach, and even to being moral support

Momoi often reminds you to take breaks being the caring person that she is

you often showed her the ropes and tricks of being a manager, on top of your duties, and you find it really endearing that she’s so earnest in learning from you

even if you enjoyed doing what you do, part of the massive workload is to try to get into Akashi’s good graces

talking to him about basketball duties is easier to achieve than talking to him outside of the extracurricular

you might be a tad bit insecure about it; after all, what middle schooler is already so accomplished in academics, sports, and everything you could think of? wasn’t he also studying to take over his father’s company??

to you, who only starred as Teiko’s humble manager, it felt hard trying to establish common ground for conversation outside of basketball

so you stuck to working hard at your position, hoping that your work ethic would get his attention one day; you were a firm believer of actions over words, so you hoped your actions would come off as genuine

picture you and Momoi running across campus with stacks of papers for the team… it makes most of the teammates’ hearts melt at the sight

your work certainly got you praises from other teammates, but out of all players, Kise was the one who figured out your motive

you felt absolutely morbid; to think that Kise, of all people, would figure you out like the back of his hand

Kise being sweet as he is, offers to help you get with the captain but you merely prompted to threaten to break his arm if he spilled your crush to anyone else

“(y/n)-cchi… I’ve been thinking.”

“Yes, Kise?”

“It’s really cool that you’re working so tirelessly for the team, but I can’t help but wonder if there’s a reason why you work so hard.”

“O-Of course I do! I want to see you guys all succeed!”

“Then I’m curious as to why you always look at Akashicchi—o-ow, ow, ow!! (y/n)-cchi, I’m sorry! So can you please let go of my—ow!”

“H-How did you know?!”

“I-It was as obvious as day, (y/n)-cchi! I’m pretty sure even Kurokocchi found out about this before I did!”

“N-No way!!”

“Tell you what, I’m super duper knowledgeable in this stuff! You can count on me for this sort of advice—OW!”

spoiler alert: Kise was right in that Kuroko definitely noticed your attraction to Akashi before anyone else… he just never brought it up to you

one day, Kuroko comes up to you to whisper:

“(y/n)-san, have you realized that Akashi-kun has been observing you recently during practice?”

“W-Wait! Is he looking over here right now?”

“Not that I think. He’s occupied with the coach right now.”

“D-Do you think this is a good sign?”

Kuroko gives you a small smile before he replies, “I would like to think so. Keep working hard, (y/n)-san.”

and you do, you’re constantly on top of your game for the next season until Momoi suddenly gets more recognition for her “precognitive defense” skills

her newfound talent was extraordinary and never-before-seen, and her ability became more critical to Teiko’s victories than your own skills

you were happy and proud for her, because after all, her achievements were extremely deserving to be praised

it’s only when some 1st-string players started making offhand comments about how you weren’t really needed in the 1st-string and was more suited to the lower strings that placed seeds of doubt into you

these people would often compare you to Momoi in how she improved much more despite you being in the team for longer

there’s also talk about how your skills are more useful for 2nd-string and 3rd-string players because Momoi’s ability is already sufficient enough for Teiko’s starters

after all, how would a player even be injured if they can predict their opponents’ moves to avoid such incidents?

there’s also the fact that Akashi has been calling Momoi more frequently to research on upcoming teams for analytical data because her talent has become very useful to ensuring victory

the same peers and adults who gave you praise were the same people who began to ignore you or dismiss you; that being said, the collective change in attitude is definitely subtle enough that it would fly under most people’s radars

Kuroko was the first to notice and defend you against a small group of players who were bold enough to badmouth you in the gym

Kise would find out a little later about the somewhat unpleasant gossip about you and would pull the “no you” reverse card, returning back with MEANER underhanded comments that would send these shit talkers CRYING HOME (manga Kise strikes here unexpectedly eh?)

Murasakibara is someone who would be slightly uncomfortable with the gossip about you, especially since you’ve always been so helpful and kind to the team and himself; he’d either leave the room himself or easily scare them away with his looming height and presence without saying a single word when he enters the room “minding his own business”

Midorima is a bystander judging from how he’s reacted to the Teiko dynamic changes in the actual show // he, of course, wouldn’t like the nasty talk about you but would actually mind his own business, choosing to focus on himself and what he has to do to contribute to his team; he assumes that you would work hard the same way he is and let your contributions do the talking

now Akashi surprisingly wouldn’t hear much of the gossip, since his presence alone SHUTS them up and commit to their practices like normal; after all, it’s very clear that Akashi doesn’t tolerate this type of behavior in the team (example: Haizaki), and it’s more apparent that he wouldn’t hesitate to drop kick them out especially since he has a soft spot for you (which Kise never fails to bring this up to you, but you think he’s reaching too much into it) // TLDR; the teammates mostly have the common sense to not utter anything bad about you… maybe one kid would slip out and get punished for “bad sportsmanship,” but Akashi merely assumes that it’s just one bad apple and not necessarily… the many others as well

Aomine???? bro he ain’t even at practice wdym (HELPPP LMAOO) // jokes aside, if he catches wind of players shit-talking outside of the gym… say at the convenience store or when he’s walking home or something, well… they wouldn’t have a good time…

Momoi simply chastises the gossipers when they try to talk shit on you to make Momoi herself look good, and it leaves? such? a? horrible? taste? like, she wants to believe that they’re just really poor jokes and not what they really believe in, and the teammates merely reassure her that they’re just bad jokes and that they “wouldn’t do it again;” poor Momoi wholeheartedly believes them

the weird talks about Momoi being “the better manager” just signalled to you that you haven’t contributed enough to the team yet, and it motivated you to work even harder

oddly, you weren’t jealous of the fact that Momoi was receiving more positive attention than you

you were more afraid of the fact that you were going to get left behind, and this fear only tightened its hold on you when more teammates (who used to talk to you a lot) have changed their tunes when they speak with you now, compared to them talking to Momoi

and you felt that the Generation of Miracles would do the same too… including Akashi

it wasn’t an irrational fear for you because he’s already been calling Momoi a lot more frequently for help than you recently

so you even offered to mop the gym floors after practice, offered to stay later than usual to be the one to lock up the gym for anyone (cough, Kuroko) who wanted to practice whenever they wanted

at one point, you even tried to do what Momoi does: researching on upcoming teams and making your own predictions (that didn’t really work, and that cost you a few nights’ worth of sleep every single time)

not to mention that you still had regular school like any other student? you were the epitome of a mess

Kuroko was with you in the empty gym, you putting away the extra basketballs in the storage closet while he practiced his dribbling, until he heard a crash in there and a few basketballs rolled out the door

you collapsed right when you rolled in the basketball cart

POOR KUROKO HE DOESN'T KNOW WHAT TO DO // he just tries to give you a piggyback ride as he abandons his plans of practice and tries to jog to the nearest local clinic

that’s where he bumped into Kise, who was heading home after an evening shoot when he saw the two of you

chaos ensue as Kise freaks out and Kuroko had to calm him down himself after answering the never-ending questions

at least the doctor there gave relieving news that you only collapsed from over-exhaustion and that the bruises from the fall were very faint

Kise makes a joke to Kuroko about, “What’s with you and (y/n)-cchi falling to the floor and fainting? You guys can’t be that alike.”

when you shortly regain consciousness, you were met with a… very stern Kuroko and Kise, who were both ready to hear your explanation and to scold you to oblivion

to your surprise, they were understanding; Kuroko understands the feeling of not being enough and working hard to meet other people’s expectations, and Kise understands the struggle of juggling multiple things in his schedule (come on, student, athlete, and model?)

they still scolded your ears off:

“(y/n)-san, you idiot. Why didn’t you ask anyone to help out?”

“That’s…”

“(y/n)-cchi, do you think we’re undependable?!”

“Er, no, that’s…”

you were still dizzy from the fall and the lack of proper sleep (and maybe nutrition if we’re being honest), and you were just a ball of stress

you kind of begged your best friends not to tell a SOUL to anyone about this incident, especially to Akashi… you didn’t want to look even more incapable in his eyes than you already were

they do agree on one condition: for you to take AT LEAST a day or two off school to completely recover and rest up (you reluctantly agree; besides how were you going to explain the bruises that can’t be covered to your peers?)

HELP WHY ARE KISE AND KUROKO THE BEST LIARS TOGETHER ON CAMPUS LITERALLY NO ONE SUSPECTS A THING… except Akashi, the ever sharp captain, felt something was amiss

especially since some Teiko players emanated a feeling of relief at the news of you not being here that day, or the next

Akashi would play detective sleuth and find out what’s really going on sooner or later

End Note: gonna cut this off here b/c I KNOW this anon got a juicy part two i FEEL IT

[tomdiddlyumptious]

T.H| Thottery

Summary: your doing pottery

Warnings: i guess sexual tension? AND YOUR A WITCHHH- AND A PLANT MOMMY- AND SOULMATES

A/n: its all i could think of when i saw tom in that tank top- and

It was another day in the shop, silence filling the room as you walked around to see the stuff you and tom made, the small store cozy, mostly green and beige everywhere to get a warm mood going.

The room smelled like roses, an incense in your hand as you took your time, slightly bobbing your head to nirvana in the background.

The bell rung letting you know someone was here, you poked your head from the shelves and looked at the door, seeing tom struggle with donuts in his dominant hand while the coffee stood in the other.

“Youre late!” You smiled and he groaned, thanking you when you made your way over to grab the donuts. “Im not late- your just early” he said, watching as you took a donut out and bit into it.

You and tom shared the shop, yes he had dreams of going to be a actor but he wasnt gonna ditch you. Youve both been best friends since he accidentally tripped you and made you cry in 5th grade, which he begged to do your homework as an apology. But there was always a tension when you both grew up, he sent you letters, well check up letters, if you need help on your homework letters, sometimes a hershy bar glued to it.

You told him your okay all the time and to stop wasting time on you, telling him to go feed his dog or clean his room because you knew he always forgot. You sent letters back too, you both didnt call each other because you liked the old ways and he admires that, he liked that you rode on your skateboard just to see him and ask him hows hes doing, he just felt like you are heaven sent.

“Righttt, well i got some crystals” you smiled at him, setting the donuts on the small white table before grabbing the box of crystals. “Y/n you know i dont like that witch stuff!” He glared at you and placed the coffee down next to the donuts.

“But tommy!” You smacked your lips, bending your knees repeatedly like a child. “They’re so beautiful and they mean something! I even got candles and cardsssss!”

He gave you a blank stare, before looking away “fine” “thank youuuu!” You walked over and he sat in his stool infront of the turntable, you made your way over and set the box in his lap, getting on your knees and opening the box.

“Swear that you wont curse me or this has no bad juju” “i just have to clean them first-“ “Y/N!” He groaned “whatttt!” You poked his leg, “stop being mean to me!”

“Im not being mean to you!” He looked down at you, you let out a hmph and got up, snatching the box before taking it into the backroom where your shared stuff went.

“Im sorry y/n!” He said, looking in the direction of the back room but sighed when he didn’t get an answer, instead of saying something again he got up to go back there, seemed like you went to the bathroom because you disappeared. He grabbed a bucket and filled it with water, then he grabbed a thing of clay that was wrapped in saran wrap to keep it fresh and went back to his turn table.

He set the stuff down, putting his foot on to buttom and watching the small circle turn before lifting his white shirt, revealing his abs right before his black tank top came down.

He heard the box of donuts opening which left a smile on his face, quietly walking over and sneaking behind the shelf before throwint his shirt at you, leaving a groan before you looked back at him, shooting him a glare.

“Can you hold that for me?” “You couldve kept it in the back smarty pants” “i guess i didnt want to this time” he shrugged with a smrik, walking off “your shirt stinks!” You lied, making him laugh and shake his head before sitting down and getting to work.

You looked through google trying to find more research about the crystals before tom called you for help. “Y/nnnnn!” “Yes thomas?” You asked, still looking at your phone.

“I need your helppp!” He said, looking down at the awkward clay bowl, a few lumps here and there in it. “Coming!” You stood and made your way over, wheb you peeked your head out you saw him trying to fix it.

His hair fluffy so his curles hanged over his head, his fingers painted with clay as he gently rubbed the bowl trying to flatten it out.

“What happened?” You asked and he sighed, shrugging “it just isnt working” “it’s probably like that because you didnt put on your lucky apron” you chuckled, grabbbing the both yours and his aprons next to the large green plant.

A loud groan left his lips as his shoulders slumped and rested his eblow on his knee, setting his cheek on his knuckles as he looked at you walking over. “Dont bring any bad spirits in here tom”

“Hey! Im not trying to!” He playfully rolled his eyes, you handed him his apron, small spidermans on it while yours had my little ponys.

“Alrightttt” you muttered, telling him to move his hand, when he did you sat on the leg nearest to you and he instantly wrapped his hand around your waist, watching as you dipped your hands in the water. “Its your turn to wash the aprons” you muttered, he let out a hum and a small laugh before you stepped on the button, letting the water drip from your hands and onto the clay.

“Can you make a heart in the middle?” He whispered, rubbing your side as he watched your hands work. “Whos it for?” You laughed and he shrugged “you” “me?” Your eyebrows furrowed and he squeezed your waist tight “yeah, why not?”

“Uh- i dont know?” You shrugged a bit, stuttering. Trying your hardest to focus but you messed up, a sigh leaving both of your lips as you had to restart.

You put the clay back in a glob, putting your hands around making it tall, a cough left toms lips as he looked away, while you tried your hardest not to laugh. “Y/n fix it” he asked. “I dont know...i kinda like it like this” you said, placing a hand on his knee.

“It looks like a penis” and with that you laughed “no seriously fix itttt!” “Okay okay, only if you let me do a reading on you”

“Y/n i dont like witchery” “but you like harry potter?” “I-its different” “fineee, i only wanted to know what your love life is looking like” you muttered and toms ears perked up. “You can find that out?” “Yeah, but you dont want to soooo-“

“Okay okay! Just fix please!” He lifted the knee that you were sitting on and rubbed your side letting you know he was ready. You chuckled and got to work.

About 5 minutes later you asked for toms hands, he gave them to you willingly and you sat all the way in his lap, tugging his hands forward his head was right in your neck, heavy breathing on your neck as you could help but get a little goosebumps on your neck.

You rocked his hands back and forth “mhm, just like that” you muttered “yeah like this?” He teased, “no your fucking up”. “Fuck off” you both laughed, you let his hands go and let him do it on his own.

“Are you ready for the reading?” You asked, tom sitting infront of you nervously and shirtless, both of your hands clean and creation drying in the back.

“I think so” he shrugged, you lit the sage “this is a cleaner okay, calm down. This is to save me and you from getting possessed”

His jaw dropped as he got up, a loud laugh leaving your lips before you told him your kidding. “Dont play like that y/n!”

You set the crystals out, on the end of the both of your ends of the table. “Y/n we arent transporting to another dimension, right?” He asked, looking at the sage and how professional it looks. “Noo we arent, you want the love reading or not”

“Im gonna shut up” he said and you agreed, telling him it would save the whole world. You shuffled the deck before knocking on it, his eyebrows furrowed as he let out that the sage stinks which made you shoot daggers.

“Alright tom” you let out a deep sigh, looking at the card infront of you. He looked at you confused, then looked at the cards.

“The Fool, High priestess, The Lovers, and death reversed” you looked up at him and lifted your eyebrows “are you resisting something?”

He shrugged “what could I possibly be resisting?”

“Im seeing soulmates, mystery and innocence. Maybe uhhhh something from childhood, someone from childhood”

He felt a cold chill, but made it stay hidden.

“Young, im getting young, you’ve probably walked by your soulmate already, had some type of chatting with them, gotten close to them, maybe some type of physical touch?” You mostly talked to yourself, tapping The Fool card before grabbing the deck, two cards flipping out and landing on tom. You reached over and grabbed them, “The World Reversed and The Star, tom you are holding something back and your spirits are giving you hope, they are hoping you are gonna speak up because you are disappointing them”

“Well im not holding anything back!” He said, panicked. “Do you think or feel like youve passed your soulmate?” You asked, he hesitatingly nodded his head. “That you have touched them?” He nodded again, a large smile on your face.

“Im so excited for youuu!” You danced in your chair, tom grinned a bit, “uhm with these card i feel like they ARE spiritual. Thomas” you glared at him. “And lets check the bottom of the deck”

You looked at the bottom and saw “temperance, i getting that after you do this, weight will be lifted off of your shoulders”

“Uhh okay” he awkwardly smiled, shifting in his seat. You looked at all the cards “lets get into looks”

“Im seeing a lot off y/s/c (your skin color), they might have y/e/c, i see they have a bright smile, y/h/c”

“Y/n?” He asked. You looked up at him and furrowed your eyebrows “why does that describe you?” “Describe me...?” You took it all in, going back and furrowing your eyebrows as you thought about what you said.

“Are you my soulmate?” He asked. “How am I supposed to know that? And uh, soulmates doesnt always mean that we like each other, were just connect platonically” “but what if we arent.......platonic soulmates?” He asked, looking at you.

“Why wouldnt we?” You did a panicked laugh. “I dont know” “do you think we are soulmates?” You asked, putting the cards down. “I mean, we get along really well” he looked away from you, you bit your lip.

“So we are soulmates,” “i guess yeah” he shrugged “platonic soulmates-“ “i-i dont think so” he looked at you, “tom what-“ “i dont wanna be platonic soulmates y/n”

Your eyebrows furrowed “do you like me?” You laughed, and he nodded, “i uh always have” he played with his fingers and looked down at his bare chest. “Why did you tell me sooner?”

“Huh?” He looked up at you. “You were obviously stressing for no reason-“ “do you like me too?”

“Yes” you shrugged, you had to. You noticed your love for him when he sent you your fith letter.

𝑫𝒆𝒂𝒓 𝒚/𝒏,

𝒀𝒐𝒖 𝒉𝒂𝒗𝒆 𝒏𝒐 𝒇𝒖𝒄𝒌𝒊𝒏 𝒊𝒅𝒆𝒂 𝒉𝒐𝒘 𝒎𝒂𝒏𝒚 𝒕𝒊𝒎𝒆𝒔 𝒊 𝒉𝒂𝒅 𝒕𝒐 𝒓𝒆-𝒕𝒓𝒚 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒔𝒐 𝒃𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒏𝒌𝒇𝒖𝒍𝒍. 𝑱𝒖𝒔𝒕 𝒘𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒆𝒅 𝒕𝒐 𝒓𝒆𝒎𝒊𝒏𝒅 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒊 𝒍𝒐𝒗𝒆 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒊 𝒅𝒊𝒅 𝒊𝒏𝒅𝒆𝒆𝒅 𝒇𝒆𝒆𝒅 𝒎𝒚 𝒅𝒐𝒈. 𝑨𝒏𝒅 𝒑𝒍𝒆𝒂𝒔𝒆 𝒔𝒕𝒐𝒑 𝒔𝒆𝒏𝒅𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒎𝒆 𝒄𝒉𝒐𝒄𝒐𝒍𝒂𝒕𝒆, 𝒊 𝒂𝒍𝒎𝒐𝒔𝒕 𝒔𝒉𝒊𝒕𝒕𝒆𝒅 𝒎𝒚 𝒑𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒔 𝒚𝒆𝒔𝒕𝒆𝒓𝒅𝒂𝒚.

𝑳𝒐𝒗𝒆, 𝒕𝒐𝒎𝒎𝒚.

“And you didnt say anything?” “Well i wasnt into spirits and shit like that when i was 15!” You said to him. “So we love each other. Like not platonically but like” he put his first fingers together. “To fast!” You said, and he laughed standing up and leaning over the table and you did the same, his hand came up to your cheek as yours went to the nape of his neck to play with the hairs, he gently pressed his lips on yours, you giggled against his lips and kissed back.

When you both pulled away you pressed your foreheads together, both laughing and pressing each others lips together again “im like 95 percent sure our spirit guides are high fiving each other right now” you muttered. “Yeah?” He asked, kissing the side of your lips. “Yeah” “mhm” “are they like watching us right now?”

“I dont wanna freak you out” you bit his bottom lip tugging it. “You wont freak me out i promise” “nahhhh”

[angelblumes]

food ment. Helllooooooo ugh would you like me to beat her up perhaps end up like her namesake, og mischa?(jk im not a (cannibal)) time to bust out the therapy voice tho , you will find your people and they will love you. Ok. ok wtf is happening? are we like the same person or something? wellbutrin buddies ❤ my room needs to be clean and moved the whole sha bang but I cant😔 life needs to be lived and such. I hope you arrived safely and happily and that everything is slightly better for you than it was last message and that you didn't get too carsick. my power went out today for like 3 seconds everything turned off everything , it usually takes alot for that to happen for my house just because its old and other reasons that I dont actually know. I've had a jam out session yesterday, it was so relaxing 😌 🙌 danced my little heart out to them guys I told you about. There's something abt the murders in hannibal that just does it for me... the artistry of it all. I love it when we talk outside of the 5 daily things too!!! hey, did you get that 'you're so mature for your age' as a kid or 'you've got an old soul' ? whats ur thoughts on that? I personally cant really imagine saying that to a kid maybe its a generational thing? ok 🙄😁 I like commentary ive been watching reactions? on youtube its a guilty pleasure, also I've been getting into some reality tv. Wife swap is crazy I love it alot and then the dating ones because ofc. whats one of the 1st reality show you remember watching and not hating? Honey Boo Boo and I Am Jaz (I think?) were my top two choices of reality. maybe a rewatch is in order for me. ok daily things um a guitar got brought into my house today i... its very.. it made me weirdly happy I love music and its instruments. thank goodness tbh my med were just a little later than usual, the pharmacy gave me emergency 3 days for they can figure out whats up because this is the second time we are having the same problem 😅 I had the best brownie of my life, it was store bought but like from the bakery fav dessert. I got this "new" shirt on so comfy, its tie dyed splattered different blues with an astronaut and nasa logo in white, its cute but also like 3? sizes too big (its a hand me down) dont worry abt the guy if a next time happens ill be ready for it 💪 it will go down, I personally know the man's family I will ruin his life if it comes down to it (we live in a town idk if it's small)or realistically just sic my family onto him. I found out my cousin has a gf now and is apparently very much happier than she was with her ex man (who made awesome cheesecake btw off topic tho) gay people stay winning, I did not know she was not straight tho so happy little surprise 😁 jeez its a lot of words uh I hope you're doing good and you had a good sleep and other nice stuff happen to you and you had a good trip🌷🤟🤙❤

HELPPP u are an angel. thank u❤️. and right exactly. normalize thinking fictional murders are artistic or something . thinkin abt how i used to think criminal minds murders were interesting but never had the right words so i'd just be like "woah he *kills them weirdly*? cool"😭. BUT YEAH i did get that all the time omfg "ur so mature for ur age!!" like thanks it's because i have issues and problems 💀....hmm i hate reality tv HAHA. this gc i'm in was just talking abt wife swap the other day how crazy !! idk if i've EVER liked reality tv .... i like watching commentary abt it (like uhh cody ko's stuff) but watching it myself... nope😭. daily things lets see!!! i went to the baltimore aquarium:) i was exhausted tho. saw that a tiktoker i like (hello fem will graham cosplayers...) went there a few days before me. how funny! i wish we had met and fallen in love or something. i went to bed at 5pm yesterday and slept til 3am. then went back to sleep from 6am to 10am. i think my new adhd/anxiety meds are the cause. sadly. cuz they work! but by making me too tired to be nervous or start thinking too much🥲. i'm tired 24/7 already and thats not helping LOL! i had this fancy meal ok multiple fancy meals and it was really nice. i got chesapeake chicken (haha like chesapeake ripper am i right?!?) and it had crab but i'm crazy i'm crazy i didn't eat the crab. the texture was soooo bad. anyway at another place i got a burger bc i'm lame i don't eat seafood (besides shrimp. which i am allergic to.) and i ate almost the whole thing and my friends mom said she was proud of me😭❤️. i always feel so guilty after eating a lot and that made me feel good. i've started watching more vampire video game play throughs. what can i say. vampire masquerade: bloodlines did something to my brain where i like vampire games now. it's the same guy which is cool. i dont like finding new youtubers becuz i've never kept up w whose problematic or not... like what if i get really into someone and mention it and someone's like oh yeah he preys on women. wtf. like umm cry? is he a youtuber? is he evil? cuz i was looking for a pathologic gameplay and he had one and i was like hmm... he sounds familiar. he has probably done something ? maybe? mm lastly.... i read this hunger games hannibal crossover WEEKS AGO but it's just still on my mind. i don't particularly love the hunger games but it's only bc i don't really know a lot abt it. i enjoy it but i've only seen the movies and read the first book (until rue died. never picked it up again after that! i cried a lottttt) and there's like an absurd amount of hannibal crossovers. i guess bc hannibal would totally rule in the hunger games. like come on a CANNIBAL? the uh.. capitol? they'd go crazyyyy for that. the fic itself wasn't even that groundbreaking or anything i have a lot of criticism for it tbh but it opened my brain to the concept. i have another one opened in a tab but it's super long so i haven't made much headway. i want one where it's like.... the one where the old winners come back for a game! and then they escape😈. but in the one i read will and hannibal sort of just escape anyway in a normal hunger game. like ok cool but i don't think that's plausible. but then how would it work ? like could will win a game on his own? maybe i should write my own fic. but then i'd have to understand what happens in the hunger games /j. ugh ok i was thinking abt that one scene where idk they do the little hand signal thing and drag katniss away and go to shut the door like right as they shoot that guy in the head. THAT WAS SO CRAZY. or when katniss shoots the lady instead of president snow and then everyone just descends on him💀 i feel like there's a level of nuance and understanding that i just don't have so i say "woah! cool :)" i hope ur doing well too ily❤️❤️💗

[writeherewrite-now]

teardrops on my guitar

so I played the guitar in the end, for L cell, though I said I wouldn’t (I didn’t intend to, until the day before cell)

I didn’t have access to a guitar until a few hours before that, so I practised within that time frame and hoped for the best. It didn’t go too badly, but I’d never been so disengaged during worship. In the end, I played and prompted everyone by saying out the starting line of the next verse/chorus/bridge, but that was it.

Maybe it was because my fingers were dying and I was desperately trying to follow the chords and play a basic strumming pattern; maybe it was because my throat hurt a lot, and I sounded like a nasal toad, so singing wouldn’t have been a good idea either. But I’d never felt so disengaged. I didn’t manage to get that deeper revelation, even though it was all I’d wanted, even though it was what I was sharing about.

I told the group I knew somehow that we should sing “You are Holy”.

You are holy, holy Lord there is none like You You are holy, holy Glory to You alone

“but what does ‘God is holy’ mean? And why do we thank Him for it? 

It always flew over my head during worship, because the concept is too big, and I didn’t have time to process it while singing. When we say someone is holy, we mean that they are pure, 乖, obedient to God, but what does it mean to say God is holy?

I searched for the dictionary definition. One definition says: dedicated or consecrated to God. But what about God Himself? How is God holy?

Another definition is to be morally and spiritually excellent. I guess for God, to be holy means to be morally and spiritually perfect.”

“Why then, do we thank Him for being morally and spiritually perfect?” I asked the group.

“I thought about it, and I’m thankful that He’s morally perfect, so His love and faithfulness will never end, and I can trust in His unfailing love forever.”

I’m thankful for His moral perfection, so He forgives me over and over, despite my deepest, darkest sins, and the days when I am part of my worst nightmares.

And as planned, I said: Let’s sing this next song first, and let’s think of what we’re thankful to God about, and as we’re singing, let’s think of why we’re thankful that God is holy. And if you still have brain space after that, while trying to sing in tune, then think of how to use these things you’re thankful for to give your testimony more ammo. (I did sing through the song many times, haha.)

I will bless the Lord at all times I will bless the Lord at all times I was made to worship I was made to bless Your name

Ultimate leader’s test/test of maturity. Do you love what God did for you, or do you love God for who He is?

Difficult worship session to lead, no? How do you help everyone praise God for His character, rather than just what He’s done for them? To me, the two seemed inseparable. 

During worship, I wanted to understand why exactly I would praise God for being holy. I tried dissecting that before I led the songs, of course, but I guess I wanted another breakthrough. 

I already knew He loved me with an unfailing love, but I only knew that because of what He’d done, right?

I felt lost.

Like I said, I’d never felt so disengaged. I wasn’t even trying to understand the meaning of the words, because I was so focused on everything else. Martha>Mary, all day every day. 

I didn’t manage to get that deeper revelation, and I was so disappointed.

Maybe it’s not for me to receive.

On hindsight, if I hallucinate it, confabulate it, maybe I did get that revelation, during that night’s sharing after worship. (Does God speak through people? Am I the only one who feels like I’m forcing this to be true because I’m so desperate for it to be real ohmy someone please helppp.)

My leader said: When we face doubts, that’s “when we fall back on our understanding of God”, and “Do we define God because of our experiences, or because of what the Bible says about Him?” 

and for once this struck me, convicted me, because I realized the Bible will always have that little more, that little extra thing to challenge us.

I’d always brushed it aside, because it felt like believing stuff from the Bible is always secondary to our experiences: we believe because we saw that it happened before. But the Bible always has that something more about God, something more that we haven’t seen before, something about God to be trusted and hoped for.

For example, Jer 29:11, even though I don’t feel much hope for my future right now. But I trust in it anyway, because the Bible says so. Maybe I should extrapolate that to other verses.

Know His moral and spiritual perfection. Nothing flawed.

Don’t just believe He can heal, believe that He will heal.

And that extra jump: Even if He doesn’t, know that His moral and spiritual perfection remains.

Jeremiah 29:11 - “For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”