#58th squadron

[casside-sionnach]

Space: Above and Beyond SABB The SA-43 Endo/Exo-Atmospheric Attack Jet ("Hammerhead") is the main-stay of the Marine Corps. Their SCRAM engines enable them to fly in an atmosphere and in the almost complete vacuum of space. Following in the modular design of aircraft of the late 20th century, Hammerheads can be adapted for normal combat, search and rescue, and possibly other missions. The canopies of the craft are also detachable allowing docking with space platforms. Systems that are known to exist in the Hammerheads include LIDAR (Laser Infrared Detection And Ranging), HUD (Heads-Up Display) and ODP (Optical Disk Playback). The 58th Squadron, also known as the "Wild Cards" is a United States Marine Corps Space Aviator Cavalry squadron, assigned to the 5th Wing. The 58th was formed in 2063, from recruits who graduated from the United States Marine Corps Space Aviator Recruitment Depot in Loxley, Alabama. The newly formed 58th were vital in delaying a Chig fleet from attacking Earth until reinforcements arrived from Groombridge-34. The 58th Squadron, assigned to the carrier USS SARATOGA were on the forefront of several major battles in the Chig War * Triva: Full-scale models of the "Hammerhead" fighters used in the series were created in Australia at RAAF Base Williamtown. An unverified report stated that, while they were being stored on board the freighter before shipping, crewmen from a Russian freighter were caught taking pictures of them after mistakenly thinking they were a new kind of advanced U.S. tactical fighter.

[usafphantom2]

14 November 1974. The first operational McDonnell Douglas F-15A Eagle fighters were delivered to the 555th Tactical Training Squadron, 58th Tactical Training Fighter Wing, Luke Air Force Base, Arizona.

@ron_eisele via X

[alex99achapterthree]

Phantom Friday...

...clean and shiny.

USAF F4-C ; 58th Tactical Fighter Training Squadron at Luke Air Force Base, 1971.

It looks like they got into the Technical Orders and applied every last stencil and notification they could find.

Black and white bands indicate the wing commander's aircraft. Note two red stars on the intake, signifying two aerial victories. The aircraft was assigned to the 58th's Commander, in this case double MiG killer Brig Gen Fred Haeffner.

[pinturas-sgm-aviacion]

1945 02 Final assault - Stan Stokes

B-29 Superfortress 42-24625 from 498th BG, 875th Bomb Squadron Nose Art 'Lady Mary Anna'

The largest and most powerful bomber of WW II, the Boeing B-29 Super Fortress, played a major role in bringing about the defeat of Japan. In addition to accelerating Japans surrender following the bombing of Hiroshima and Nagasaki with atomic bombs, thousands of B-29 crews flew tens of thousands of bombing missions against Japan from bases in China, India, and later in the War from recaptured islands in the Pacific. B-29s entered service in 1943 following a lengthy, problem-filled, development process of three years in response to the governments request for a long range strategic bomber. Only Boeing and Douglas (the B-32 Dominator) responded to the governments requests, and the B-32 had even greater development problems than the B-29. Powered by four giant Wright R-3350-23 radial engines generating a total horsepower of 8,924, the Super Fortresses typically carried crews of ten. They were capable of a top speed of 357-MPH, and at slower cruising speeds had a range of more than 3,200 miles. The B-29 was a large aircraft for its time with a wingspan in excess of 140 feet and a length of just under 100 feet. The Super Forts also had pressurized forward and aft hulls, which made the long distance missions a bit more comfortable for the flight crews. B-29s typically carried defensive armament which included ten machine guns and a single tail-mounted canon. Because of the pressurized hull, the guns were operated by remote control. The first operational B-29 wing was the 58th which flew out of the China-Burma-India theater. On March 9, 1945 General Curtis LeMay ordered an unusual low altitude attack on Tokyo by hundreds of B-29s carrying incendiary bombs. Five such low level missions were scheduled over a ten-day period, and the combined destruction of these missions exceeded that of either of the atomic bomb missions. B-29s were also effectively used to mine Japanese ports and shipping lanes. The Kawasaki Ki-45 Toryu heavy fighter, which is depicted attacking the B-29 in Stan Stokes painting, entered production in 1941 following a lengthy four year development. About 1,700 of these aircraft, code named Nick by the allies, were produced. The Ki-45 never proved effective as a long range daylight interceptor. It was, however, used effectively in ground attack and night fighter roles. It was one of only a few Japanese aircraft that had some success against the onslaught of B-29s because it was able to attain the high altitudes necessary to intercept the high-flying Super Fortresses.

[dilemmaontwolegs]

Broken Wings || Pt.5

Sam Wilson x OFC Ada Marks

Summary: A 6-8 part mini series following OC Ada Marks as she rekindles a relationship with Sam but can they really get past their long history for a fresh start or is it better to just let go. Set after FATWS with Bucky and Sam being friends. Warnings: 18+ only, NSFW, violence, warfare, sexual themes. || Series Masterlist || Part 1 || Part 2 || Part 3 || Part 4 || Part 5 || Part 6 || Part 7 ||

Afghanistan, 2013

“I don’t like this,” I said for the third time as Sam and Riley worked quickly to pack up the camp we had set up. “We should go together.”

Riley sighed to himself but wouldn’t say anything because it wasn’t in his nature to go against an order despite hating when we were separated too. “How long until they get here?” 

“Chopper will be here in an hour,” Sam said as he sat on my rucksack so I could zip the overfull bag closed. “You and I fly in at 2300.”

“What about me?” I rose with my hands on my hips.

“We have been over this babe, two of us going in is already a risk,” he said, shaking his head. “You’ll be on standby, Ada.”

I wasn’t happy with the strategy but arguing would get me nowhere, but I would damn well make sure I was ready and waiting should one of them need me. 

I rolled up my mattress and tied it up with twine before tossing it out of the tent and onto the growing pile of belongings. My uniform was the only thing left unpacked but I wouldn’t change into it until the tent was dismantled. Taking it down would break a sweat and the last thing I wanted was to sit in damp clothes on an hour long flight back to base. 

“Incoming,” Riley announced as he heard the chopper blades while we were rolling the last of the canvas tent up tight. 

We quickly shoved the tent into its travel sack and covered our eyes as our transport arrived, kicking up dust in its wake. Two fairly new soldiers jumped out and helped us pack the chopper with our bags before we strapped in and we were off. The desert terrain fell away as we climbed higher and higher and the peace I had felt camping with my boyfriends fell away with it. 

“We’re home,” Riley said as he shook my shoulder and woke me up. 

I rubbed my eyes and tried to lift my head off Sam’s shoulder but his head was heavy on top of mine and I nudged his side so he would wake up. He lifted his head and looked around, forgetting for a moment where we were before stretching and waiting for the skids to touch down.

“58th in the house!” A loud voice called out over the sounds of the engine turning off and we all smiled at the 48th Rescue Squadron leader. 

“You know how it is, Fischer, call in the big guns when shit gets real,” Sam joked as he pulled him into a hug and clapped each other on the back.

“Only until they share your tech with the rest of us,” Staff Sergeant Ian Fischer retorted with a laugh. “Go on, everyone’s in the bullring.”

I gave Ian a hug and Riley shook his hand as we walked past on our way to the building that Sam was already disappearing into. Riley slung his arm over my shoulder as he caught up and I felt the pre-mission jitters and excitement begin to build. I had no idea that just 12 hours later my world would come crashing down.

��Alright, Falcon and Eagle, you have Starling for backup but we want to get in and out under the radar so the less Exo-7s out and about the better.” 

We all nodded as we stepped into the straps of our suits and began the quite lengthy task of securing our jet propulsion wings to our backs. We checked each other’s buckles to make sure they were snug before stepping out into the cool evening air. I pushed my ear comms deeper into my ear to make sure it wouldn’t fall loose when I flew and checked that everyone could hear each other as well as command central. 

We reached the clearing where our take off point was and I stood between Sam and Riley, holding one of their hands each in mine. We had seven years of pararescue missions under our belts, four of those with the Exo-7 wings. It still never made this moment any easier. 

“These things we do,” Sam said as he squeezed my hand.

“So others may live,” Riley followed.

“58th until the end.” 

We never said I love you. We never said goodbye. It was an unspoken rule that had never been broken. We stepped away from each other and expanded our wings before engaging the jets and taking to the skies. Two yellow dots were blipping in my helmet and those would be the two lights that guided me home, Falcon and Eagle. 

"The target is 8.6 miles northeast of Dabay. Uploading coordinates now,” Air command notified us through our comms before a red dot was added to the map in my helmet. 

"Eagle, take the right flank. Starling, stay out of range behind us."

We followed Sam's direction and I broke away as we reached the mountains that crashed steeply into the valley where Khandil was in hiding. I watched as Riley barrel rolled to the right and they both dove down into the dark depths and out of my sight. The air was still as I hovered in place ready for any sign of trouble but there didn't seem to be any. I was beginning to think the intel was wrong as their positioning beacons showed they had landed in the enemies territory unscathed. 

Suddenly machine guns fired in rapid succession and I heard Sam call out to Riley as he located Khandil. Their beacons moved hastily around my helmet as they manoeuvred their way about of the valley they were trapped in and Sam confirmed he had Khandil in his custody. Unable to remain in position any longer, I set my thrusters to full speed and raced over the terrain to reach Sam and Riley. 

Bullets hit my wings as I swooped at the insurgents and took some of the heat away from my men before I saw an alert for a missile heading straight for me and I tucked my wings in close, dropping from the sky. I felt the heat of the explosion above me and looked up to find Riley had protected me from the shrapnel and other projectiles. Opening my wings wide I blew a thank you kiss to Riley before heading back to Sam.

"Starling, get out of here," Sam called out as I reached him. "Eagle, let's go!"

We both looked back as we banked sharply to avoid an RPG heading towards us and I turned to see another RPG coming from behind.

“RILEY!”

Time slowed as the horror unfolded before our eyes. He had a 50/50 chance of banking left or right to dodge the RPG that passed us but he chose wrong. His right wing curled in and he turned right into the second RPG that was coming up behind him. Fire and flames engulfed him and there was nothing that I could do as he disappeared in the explosion. 

Fury flooded me as I looked down at the men scattered around the valley walls, from here they looked like ants and those ants took Riley from me. Sam was calling out to me, ordering me to leave but I couldn’t just let them get away with what they did. I pulled the comms piece out of my ear and dropped it as I tucked my wings in and plummeted from the sky. 

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

The drive from York to Washington DC was quiet. The only voice that broke the silence was Riley as he pressed his nose to the window and watched the scenery pass us by, questions flowing from his lips quicker than the water of the Potomac River Sam drove along. Trying to ask him to have quiet time was futile and I had given up by the time we crossed that state line into Maryland, opting to try to sleep instead.

“Mr Wilson?” Riley asked as he leant into the middle of the seat and found Sam looking at him in the small mirror.

“Come on little man, call me Sam.” He smiled. “What’s up?”

“What was my dad like?” 

I fought the urge to open my eyes and kept my head on my rolled up hoodie that was doubling as a pillow for the drive. 

“Shouldn’t you be asking your mom about him?” Sam was obviously uncomfortable with the question and you heard the leather seats creak with his shuffle of movements.

“I think it makes her sad when I ask.” 

Sam’s sigh was barely audible but you knew he did it. “He was brave and kind and always put everyone else first. He was like you, protective of your mom.”

Riley chewed his lip and returned to looking out his window before gasping with fright. I bolted upright and leant across the seat to look out his window and spotted a man flying towards us with a rudimentary version of a wingsuit. 

Grabbing Riley, I tucked him under my arms and slipped a pair of control gloves over my hands to activate my wingsuit that was in the cargo hold.

“We’ve got company,” I growled as I noticed another man out my window and grabbed my son’s face. “Stay low, Ry. Hear me? Just stay low.”

“Ada, what are you-”

I pinned Sam with a stare through the rearview mirror and interrupted him, “What I have to, get Riley out of here.” 

Wind whipped around the car as I opened the door and dove out, Riley and Sam’s shouts sounding behind me. The back of the car exploded as my wingsuit tore through the metal and erupted out of it before they slammed into my back and saved me from hitting the asphalt road. 

The thruster kicked in almost immediately and I was thrown forward with the power much stronger than the previous marks had been able to pull. I almost screamed in exhilaration but it was the fear of my son that kept me focused on the two targets I had my eyes on.

It was mere seconds later that I was swooping past the car and the men with the inferior suits were too slow to avoid my sharp blades that slashed through their own wings before they could draw their weapons. One crashed heavily into the highway and came to a rest unmoving but the other managed to crash into the grass verge and lifted his weapon towards Sam’s car, at my son. 

I could never make it there in time but my wingsuit could. There was no time to think about myself as I flicked my wrist and fell from the sky as my suit disappeared from my back. A scream of pain tore from my lips as I landed badly on my already sore leg, my skin shredding along the road as I rolled but it was all secondary to the relief I felt as the wings wrapped around the back of the car, protecting its occupants from the bullets. 

The harsh sound of metal dragging across the ground had me look away from where Riley was safe and I found the man who had attacked up aiming his gun at me. It wasn’t the first time I had stared down a barrel but it was not something that ever got any easier and I felt the blood rushing in my ears as my heart raced. I didn’t want to die but I couldn’t risk bringing the wingsuit back and leaving Riley unprotected, he was my world. 

“My boss wants you alive so he can kill you himself,” the man spoke in Pashto. 

“Khandil can kiss my ass,” I spat back and jutted my chin to the road behind him. “If he wants me, he’s going to have to go through that.”

The man’s eyes widened as he looked over his shoulder and saw Sam throw his vibranium shield. The metal crashed into his back, breaking the wingsuit he wore and throwing him off balance and off aim, right into my fist that rendered him an unconscious mess on the asphalt. 

“I told you to look after Riley!”

“I wasn’t going to leave you, again,” Sam said as his voice broke and he scooped me up as gently as he could. There was no stopping the memories that assaulted me as I inhaled the woody scent of his cologne and my head found its way into the curve where his strong shoulders met his neck. It was a place that always felt like home, and it still did.

“You really outdid yourself,” he said with a rather disbelieving chuckle as he reached the car and you closed the wingsuit up with a swish of your hand. “It’s like you’re trying to one up me.”

I barked a laugh as he slipped me onto the backseat beside a worried Riley who I immediately wrapped in my arms as I cocked an eyebrow at Sam. “Have you looked in the mirror lately? Nothing can outdo that costume of yours.”

[tarithenurse]

Sam Wilson Masterlist

Smut/lemons/nsfw/sexual themes = * Mental health issues = % Violence/gore = #

Always watch out for individual chapter warnings/content.Reader is per default female unless otherwise stated.

Series

Accidental partners

Based on the prompt: “Two random strangers are in couples therapy together. They both decide to pretend they’re a couple, despite having met each other two minutes ago”. Chapter 1 || Chapter 2 || Chapter 3 || Chapter 4 || Chapter 5 || Chapter 6 || Chapter 7 || Chapter 8 || Chapter 9 || Chapter 10 || Chapter 11 || Chapter 12

At the end of this song *

Reader works as a bartender at a karaoke-bar and thought it would be just a usual day until three heroes step in for a drink…though one might be interested in more. Chapter 1 || Chapter 2 || Chapter 3

Interconnected drabbles

Sam and Reader are a couple and both a part of the Avengers. Things happen. Chapter 1 || Chapter 2 || Chapter 3 || Chapter 4 || Chapter 5 || Chapter 6

One-shots

A favour

Set before Civil War. Reader and Sam agrees to pretend to date for the sake of Sam’s old grandmother. Things happen.

Impervious

(challenge for @princessmisery666) GN!Reader. Online harassment is not enough to scare Reader away from their love.

Last Second

Sam Wilson &/x GN!reader. You've made the mistake to wait with the holiday shopping and you really should have known better. Thankfully a stranger is of help to you.

New Years Eve *

Time for a New Years bang. No plot.

Reunion 58th Rescue Squadron *

(Challenge for @beckzorz) Maybe those reunions aren’t all bad when there’s an old flame to have fun with.

Snow everywhere *

(challenge for @devilbat) Seasonal!Reader (I swear, it will make sense). Sam’s revisiting his hometown simultaneously with Winter.

The sweetest taste

Knight!Sam x Princess!reader. Medieval AU. The princess has a new personal guard and starts to find it agreeable.

Valentine's fool *

Fake dating with all the tropes.

[samwilsonanonn]

Background

Sam Wilson used to be in the Air Force's 58th Rescue Squadron with his friend/wingman, Riley, until Riley was killed on a mission. Eventually he moved to Washington DC where he dedicated his life to helping veterans adjust to their civilian life. He then met Steve Rogers on his morning run and the two bonded over the difficulties in getting used to civilian life again.

Rules

- No interactions with people under 18

- All storylines and interactions are separate, and do not intertwine unless agreed between both parties

- Moderator is 20+

- LGBTQ+ Friendly

- Littles are welcome

- NSFW is tolerated, do not start with it or you will be ignored

- No scat or watersports

-Asks and DMs are open to everyone!

- Pick an emoji if anon

Taken emojis: None yet...

[rodspurethoughts]

The story of a stealth fighter, the F35 Lightning

U.S. Air Force F-35A Lightning II Joint Strike Fighters from the 58th Fighter Squadron, 33rd Fighter Wing, Eglin AFB, Fla. perform an aerial refueling mission with a KC-135 Stratotanker from the 336th Air Refueling Squadron from March ARB, Calif., May 14, 2013 off the coast of Northwest Florida. The 33rd Fighter Wing is a joint graduate flying and maintenance training wing that trains Air Force,…

[masqueradeassane]

Have been thinking about Space: Above and Beyond recently.

McQueen is an In-Vitro and we don't really know exactly when he was brought into the world.

For all we know, aside from Cooper Hawkes, McQueen could be all of two to five years older than the entire 58th Squadron. Hell he could be the same age as some of the Wildcards.

[usaac-official]

An A-20A of the 58th Bomb Squadron in flight over Hawaii, 29 May 1941

[taraross-1787]

This Day in History: First Landing at the North Pole

On this day in 1974, Air Force pilot William P. Benedict passes away. Benedict is best known as the first American to land a plane at the North Pole. Did you know that the Air Force and the Navy were informally racing to be the first to land a plane at the North Pole? The Navy ran into failure during March and April 1952. The stumble gave the Air Force a chance to squeak in with its own attempt. Benedict was tasked with the mission, along with Lt. Col. Joseph O. Fletcher, commanding officer of the 58th Strategic Reconnaissance Squadron at Eielson Air Force Base in Fairbanks, Alaska. The two men planned their mission in less than a month. It didn’t hurt that both had plenty of experience in Arctic conditions. The story continues here: https://www.taraross.com/post/tdih-benedict-north-pole  

[saryasy]

sary baby <3 15. dearest / ache (you can use one or both, do as you please!)

ahh a, my dear, thank you so much for the prompt 💖💖 this is very different so I hope you enjoy it!

the prompts list

15. Dearest/Ache

My dearest Sam,

How are you, my love? I hope this letter finds you well.

It has been 107 days since I was shipped out. I know because I counted them myself, one by one. And as each one passes, I miss you more and more. I lie in bed and think of you, of your beautiful smile, your calming voice. The nights are cold without you, my dear, and I want nothing more than to hold you, to touch you, to feel you.

I get anxious waiting for your letters. I hold them delicately for they were once in your hands. I read them quietly to the candlelight over and over, I can almost hear your voice whispering them to me.

My darling, there is an ache deep in me that can’t be calmed by anyone but you, and it has been growing impossibly large with every second I am away from you. I wish for this war to be over, for me to come back home to you, to hold you in my arms once again, my absolute beloved Sammy.

I love you and I miss you.

Yours forever and beyond,

James

This is the last known communication of Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes. It was intended for his roommate (read: lover) Samuel Thomas Wilson, but its transport was intercepted at the border, making it impossible for it to reach its destination.

Sam Wilson - known as the Falcon to his fellow airmen at the 58th Rescue Squadron in the Air Force - went on to live a happy and long life, though he never married. On his death bed, Wilson's last words were of Barnes' name.

Some historians believe that Sergeant Barnes didn’t die on his last mission the night after this letter was sent out. Some theorize that he actually survived his fall from the train and went on to become the infamous Winter Soldier, the main suspect in many profile killings spanning across decades, though nothing was ever proven, including the existence of the Winter Soldier himself (who many believe was nothing but a conspiracy theory, a ghost story with no basis in reality.) Others believe that he reunited with Wilson before the latter’s death, and was present at his funeral according to conflicting and unreliable accounts.

[usafphantom2]

Italian Savoia-Marchetti SM.79 "Sparviero" bombers from the 58th Squadron, 32nd Group, 10th Wing, during a low-level flight over the sea. 🌊

@Destroye83 via X

[airmanisr]

P-47D Thunderbolt by Willard Womack Via Flickr: A P-47D Thunderbolt of the 201st Mexican Expeditionary Air Force, which called themselves, “Águilas Aztecas or "Aztec Eagles”. They were attached to the 58th Fighter Group of the 5th Air Force operating in the Philippines. Missions were flown with the 58th from June 1945 until their last mission on August 26th of that same year. In that short time the Squadron flew ninety-six missions, with fifty-three being ground support missions. Of the ninety-four pilots, only one died in Combat. Three were lost in training accidents, three lost at sea, and one lost in a crash for a total of eight. They were recognized by General McArthur, and upon returning to Mexico were honored with a military parade.

[ad1thi]

begin again

for @rhodeslabs‘ prompt: "OK I HAD AN IDEA A FEW DAYS AGO FOR SAMTONY THAT I THOUGHT YOU'D LOVE. Ok so teacher!Sam with single parent!Tony AU where Sam is the best teacher for Tony kid of your choice :)". major shout-out to @omg-just-peachy for the beta and @warmachinesocks for sensitivity reading!!

i’m super proud of this fic, i put a lot into it, so please consider reblogging, and leaving a comment if you liked it!!

//

There isn’t a specific rule against having opinions on your kid’s parents, but Sam knows that it’s not the done thing.

As a teacher, he may know a lot about his kids, but he learns next to nothing about the people raising them. He doesn’t know their work schedules, or what goes on in their private lives, hell - sometimes he doesn’t even know their names until he meets them at a PTA meeting. It’s bad form to judge people you don’t know, and it’s even worse to judge them through the very biased lens of their kids.

There’s exceptions of course, like the kinds of folks who leave bruises on their kids - but for the most part, passing judgement on parents isn’t standard procedure.

That doesn’t stop Sam from fiercely hating Lila Rhodes’ old man with every fiber of his being.

//

Sam never imagined himself as an elementary school teacher.

His father was Air Force right up until the day he died, just like his father before him, and there was never any question about whether Sam would follow in the family tradition. He enlisted right before college, because if he was going to give away the rest of his life to the military, the least they could do is pay for the next four years of his life. He picks an English degree, because it’s easy enough that he’ll actually be able to enjoy college and not find himself holed up in a library - but not too obscure that he can’t do anything with it after.

Not that Sam ever plans on using his degree, but his Ma mentioned that it was good to have a back-up plan. Just in case.

He graduates Summa Cum Laude on a Friday morning, and catches the evening train to Texas for Basic Military Training. There’s no break, no pause, no hesitation about who he’s going to be or what he’s going to do. He has his orders by the end of the year, and only has time to make a quick phone call to his sister to let her know where he’s gonna go and make her promise that she’ll tell the family before he’s on the first flight out.

In truth, Sam enlisted because it was the thing to do. There was never a time in his life when he considered another path, when he was allowed to consider another path. But now that he’s here, he finds that he loves it. All that bullshit they say about the military giving you a sense of purpose? It’s true.

Still, there’s an itch under his skin, something that keeps tugging at him that’s telling him he can do more, be more - so when it trickles down the pipeline that the Brass is looking for two flyboys to test out the experimental EXO flight-suits, Sam jumps at the chance.

It takes about six months for him to retrain as a paramedic, which is more than enough time for him to get to know his new partner, Riley Evans - but when Sam puts on the EXO-1 FALCON and kicks off the ground; everything in him settles.

It’s a stupid way to describe the feeling - but it feels like everything in his life has been leading up to this very moment, Sam in the sky with honest to god wings, Riley on his left, and nothing but the open sky around them.

There’s others in their unit - in total, there’s about 8 members of the 58th Squadron, but Sam knows that he and Riley are the best. The others are good, there’s no doubt about it, but they don’t come close to the kind of stats that Sam and Riley have.

It’s exhilarating work, saving people instead of killing them, and it makes the blood in Sam’s veins thrum. He can’t write home about it, because the 58th is shrouded under all sorts of covert operations and need-to-know missions, but he tries his best to let his family know that he’s happy.

That he's more than happy, that he’s found his purpose, he’s found himself a brother, that he finally gets what his father meant when he said there’s nothing like a life in the service, son.

It’s the best three years of his life, and then everything goes to shit.

It’s a routine training session, not even an operation, and Riley’s doing loop-de-loops around Sam and generally being a dumbass. The wings have been upgraded recently, more manoeuvrability and decreased weight, and Riley’s making sure he gets his promised full range of motion.

He shoots up, yelling something that gets lost in the wind, and Sam watches as he goes up, and up and up - and then just as abruptly, he goes down.

It takes a couple of seconds for Sam to realise that Riley isn’t slowing down, that he isn’t flying down - he’s falling down; and those precious seconds cost Riley his life.

Later, he’ll hear people say that it wasn’t his fault. That there was some sort of malfunction in the wings, that Riley went too high too fast and the shift in altitude caused something to break.

Sam knows the truth though.

He catches Riley’s arm just as Riley hits the ground, his head lolled back and body limp, and rushes him to the med-camp, screaming so loud his voice goes hoarse. They rush him inside, a large burly man stopping Sam from following, and Sam stands there for five hours, in the blazing sun, catching glimpses of the doctors working as the wind moves the tent.

He stands there, un-moving, until someone steps out of the tent, caked in blood, and solemnly tells Sam that they’re very sorry, and they did everything they could.

Sam files his discharge papers the very next day.

Sarah picks him up at the airport.

//

She’s waiting for him outside, leaning against her car and furiously texting someone, so Sam sees her before she sees him. He’s split between being grateful that he doesn’t have to hail a cab, because those are next to impossible to catch from Louis Armstrong Intl Airport to Delacroix and he does not feel like renting a car - and being annoyed because he thought he had a couple of hours before someone was going to start asking him questions.

“You didn’t have to do this y’know,” Sam says when he’s close enough, and Sarah looks up with wide eyes, expression softening into a smile when she sees him, “I could’ve caught myself a cab.”

“That’s what I told Mama, but you think she listened?” Sam steps into his sister’s arms to accept the proffered hug, “Her baby boy coming home on his own? Like the fully grown man he is? Perish the thought.”

“You know I’m her favourite,” Sam wiggles his eyebrows, throwing his bags into the trunk of the car and making his way over to the passenger side, “I don’t get why you gotta be so mad about it.”

“Trust me, everybody and their mother in Delacroix knows you’re our mother’s favourite. There’s a little shrine for you next to the cash register. Any day now she’s gonna start leaving out candles next to your photo like you’re the second Jesus.”

Sam rubs at his chin, “You know - there’s been a couple of girls, and guys who’ve made that mistake before.”

The only reason Sarah doesn’t reach out and slap him upside on his head is because she’s driving, and Sam’s never been more thankful for his sister’s hyper-focus on road safety. She packs a mean punch.

They fall into a companionable silence, the kind cultivated by knowing each other for their whole lives, but Sam knows she’s biting back her questions.

“It’s okay,” he says finally, because you have to rip the band-aid off fast to lessen the pain and all that jazz, “You can ask.”

“I don’t got nothing to ask,” Sarah says immediately, like it’s a rehearsed answer, “but Mama thinks you’ve been hiding some major injury from us. Like a missing leg or something.”

Sam huffs at the non-question, “I got all my limbs Sarah. All ten fingers and toes I promise.”

There’s a beat and then - “My partner died on my watch. Fell out of the sky during a training exercise. I couldn’t stay there after that.”

Sarah hums, “You know what you’re going to do now you’re back home?”

Sam shakes his head, even though Sarah isn’t looking at him, “I have no idea.”

read the rest on ao3!!

[mimisempai]

Come close, show me your scars, let us heal together

Summary

You might think it's another version of Sam comforting Bucky, but I promise it's not.

When the nightmare is a common memory where one is the executioner and the other the victim, how to support each other? Is it possible to heal together?

https://archiveofourown.org/works/31571318

Words 2540 - Rating G

The Winter Soldier pulled on the wire with all his might to tear off one of Sam's wings.

Then with a powerful kick he pushed Sam off the top of the Helicarrier.

Buckyyyyy!

Saaaaam! Sam!

"Sam!"

Bucky woke up with a start, Sam's name on the lips.

He reached behind him, and fumbled until he encountered Sam's body.

Gradually the wave of relief replaced the wave of horror into which his nightmare had plunged him.

But could he really call a nightmare a vivid memory?

He must have been screaming loudly only in his mind, because Sam hadn't moved a muscle and was still asleep judging by the regularity of his breathing.

Bucky got up slowly so as not to wake him. He went into the kitchen, made himself a cup of tea, walked through the living room, grabbed a blanket as he passed and went to sit on the boardwalk.

Night terrors were not something unusual for him and Sam.

At the beginning of their life together, they were used to overcoming their nightmares alone, to waking up alone, and they didn't talk about it. They did everything not to wake the other, until one night during a nightmare more traumatic than others, Sam had woken Bucky by screaming.

As they talked that night, they realized the comfort they could give each other, that they no longer had to struggle alone.

And just like that, they established a kind of pattern, a way to overcome their trauma. In a rather well-oiled mechanism, one waking up the other, they prepared a cup of tea, a return to reality through domestic gestures, before going to sit on the boardwalk, the contemplation of the immutable lake helping them to regain their serenity. It was not uncommon for the rising sun to find them asleep against each other.

But tonight Bucky had not woken Sam.

He couldn't. Not when this nightmare was Sam's. Not when he was Sam's tormentor in this nightmare. How could he ask Sam to help him overcome this nightmare?

This nightmare that had actually happened.

Bucky looked down at his hands, it was those hands that had pushed Sam off the helicarrier.

He looked down at his hands, at his cursed arm, and felt as if he couldn't catch enough air, no matter how hard he breathed in, his lungs didn't seem to want to fill. His heart was beating wildly. He brought his hands to his chest in pain.

"Bucky..."

He opened his eyes, Sam was kneeling before him.

"Bucky, may I touch you?"

Bucky could do nothing but nod his head.

Sam simply placed his hands on his knees and said, "Concentrate on your breathing. Stay in the present Bucky."

"That's it, slowly, with me, inhale, two three, four, exhale, two, three, four." Sam repeated slowly, over and over, until Bucky found a steady breathing pattern.

"Are you with me Bucky?"

Bucky, still unable to answer out loud, nodded again.

"Can I let go for a second?"

Another nod.

Sam moved to sit behind Bucky, so that Bucky's back was resting on his chest. He covered them both with the blanket Bucky had brought with him and wrapped his arms around him.

"Lean against me and keep breathing with me, okay?"

Gradually he felt Bucky relax against him, and they stayed for long minutes like that.

Sam whispered after a moment, "Do you feel like talking about it?"

Bucky replied with a hoarse voice, "How? How can you hold me like that and be like that with me after what I did to you?"

"Bucky?"

"You almost died several times at my hands Sam, when I was the winter soldier, how can you stand my presence, how can you love me?"

Sam tightened his arms around Bucky and rested his forehead on his shoulder.

He took the time to think before answering.

To say he had no trauma from his fall from the helicarrier would be a lie, but this wasn't his first near death experience. His nightmares were more often due to his experience as a soldier and Riley's death.

This is what he said to Bucky before continuing, "Bucky, it's easy for me to love you because it wasn't you. Yes, I know at first I told Steve that you were one of those people that can't be saved. But I'm glad I was wrong. You're nothing like the one who was fighting me. You could grow your hair back, wear your mask, the same outfit, you wouldn't be him. You ask me how I can stand your presence Bucky. It's enough that I watch you live here, that I watch you play with the kids, help Sarah on the boat, chat with Carlos and especially the way you look at me Bucky, the way you look at me when you think I can't see you. In all of this I see you Bucky, not the winter soldier, not the man who pushed me from the helicarrier, or shot me, I see just you. The man I love."

He pressed a kiss to Bucky's hair. He let out a long sigh, and Sam felt him relax a little more against him.

"In my dream it was horrible, because I could see myself pushing you into the void and there was nothing I could do to stop myself."

"See, even your mind is telling you that it wasn't you. Yes, he is part of you. He left you with the memories of what he did, but it's not you. That's not who you are Bucky. I wouldn't have spent two years on the run for the Winter Soldier, but for Bucky Barnes I have."

Bucky turned his head and kissed him softly before resuming his position, leaning even further if it was possible into Sam's embrace.

"I love you Sam Wilson."

Sam tightened his arms around him just a little more and buried his face in Bucky's neck breathing in his scent, then asked, "Do you want to go back to bed?"

Bucky shook his head, "No, I want to stay here a little longer. Talk to me."

"Talk to you about what?"

"No wait, I have a better idea."

Bucky stood up and said to Sam with a wave of his hand, "Move along a little."

"Bucky... what are you..."

"Please Sam do as I ask."

Sam, having no idea of Bucky's intentions, did as he asked. Bucky took the position that Sam had with him. Sam sat between his legs, Bucky covered them with the blanket and hugged him the same way Sam had before.

Then he whispered in Sam's ear, "I want Sam Wilson to tell me something he has never told me before. You know everything about me, all my weaknesses, all my mistakes, all my pain, but there's a lot I don't know about Sam Wilson. What he's afraid of, what makes him sad, what makes him angry. So tell me something, tip the scales a little, you took care of me, let me show you that I can do the same for you too. That you can lean on me as much as I can lean on you. Anything, I won't judge you."

As Bucky spoke, Sam, feeling safe in his arms, was surprised himself at wanting to let go.

But the word, the name that swirled in his head, the one that haunted some of his nightmares, refused to pass his lips.

Bucky waited patiently, aware of Sam's inner struggle.

His years as a Winter Soldier or just because he was watching Sam since a long time, he had noticed the veil of sadness that passed over Sam's face when he mentioned his soldier past and specifically when he mentioned Riley.

Bucky figured it wasn't his place to ask. That Sam would talk when he needed to.

But tonight, when Sam once again had been supportive and proved how deep his feelings for Bucky were, Bucky had felt that this might be the perfect time.

When living with Sam, it was not hard to see how selfless he was.

Often to the detriment of his own needs.

But Bucky was there for that now. Bucky was ready to be the vessel for his anger, his struggles, his disappointments, his flaws, for all that the world could not see.

All he had to do was convince the man in question.

So he waited, patiently, tightening his hold every time he felt Sam hesitate.

Until Sam began to speak, his voice was barely louder than a whisper.

"Riley and I were pararescuemen working in the 58th Rescue Squadron. We were also both test pilots for the Falcon EXO-7. Our unit was on a mission to apprehend Khalid Khandil, a notable target in Afghanistan."

Bucky just put his hands on Sam's which were slightly trembling.

"Khandil was hiding in an area protected by soldiers using RPGs, preventing the U.S. Air Force from sending helicopters into the area. We had to infiltrate the area using EXO-7 Falcons, which allowed us much more movement than the helicopters. Riley was hit and killed by one of the RPGs, and there was nothing I could do to help him, I just watched him die. I don't think I've ever so much in my life experienced a sense of helplessness."

Sam made another pause, knowing that what he was about to confide in Bucky would not be easy for either of them.

"I didn't want to tell you about this just before, but I have to now, and I hope this won't make you feel any guiltier, but before you pushed me off the helicarrier, you threw Steve off before. And seeing him fall like that, in that moment I felt for a split second as helpless as the day I lost Riley."

For a moment Bucky wondered how many more times he would have to face the consequences of his actions when he was the Winter Soldier. But he soon collected himself because it wasn't about him now, it was about Sam.

"Oh Sam, I'm so sorry." he tightened his embrace.

"I didn't say that to make you apologize, I just want you to know that the worst nightmare I have of this moment is not my fall but Steve's. Steve was able to make it, but Riley... Riley wasn't a super soldier, we didn't have super powers, just our wings, and he fell just like that. It should have been me, I..."

Sam couldn't go on. His throat was tight, he could no longer speak.

Bucky simply said, "Let it go, Sam."

Sam muttered something, his voice so low that Bucky was not able to understand.

"Hm?"

"I don't know how... I'm fighting so hard to be strong that I don't know how to let go."

"Wait..." Bucky turned Sam around, who complied, so that he was facing him, then put the blanket around them. He cradled Sam's head under his chin and tightened his arms around him, then whispered into Sam's hair.

"Sam, you don't have to be strong all the time. And especially not here, with me, in my arms. I'm right here. Let me be strong for you. I promise I won't let you down. Let go, I've got you."

Sam closed his eyes and bit his lip, trying to calm himself against everything that threatened to overwhelm him. He was so ready to give in and Bucky's words were potentially the thing that could push him over the edge. He let out a shaky breath and let himself be engulfed by the sensations, in the safety of the strong arms that were wrapped around him, solid and secure, not remembering if since his father, he had felt such a strong sense of security in someone's arms.

There was nothing to stop the tears now, and he tried as hard as he could to hold them back, unable to stop them. He buried his face in Bucky's chest, the tears now uncontrollable. Bucky hugged him even tighter and gently stroked his back, whispering words of encouragement and comfort into his hair. They stayed like that for a long time and as morning approached, Sam loosened up a bit from Bucky, took a breath and wrapped his arms around himself, looking at Bucky, whose expression was nothing but understanding and acceptance.

"I... I didn't think I still had all this pain in me, or rather I did, but I didn't know I needed to express it. I thought moving on would be enough. You know, Riley was exceptional, I think I even had a crush on him, he had this optimism and hope in people. I don't know if that's why he became a rescuer, but he believed that everyone had a chance. He saw the good in everyone. So I thought it would be okay if I continued, behaving in a way that honored his memory, that it would help me grieve."

"But that didn't help you, did it? Not until you faced it. It still affects you, you know that. I've seen it." Bucky said softly.

"I'm not denying it, but I didn't think taking the time to think about it, sharing it with someone would help me. It's just... I've been dealing with it on my own for so long, buried it for so long that to suddenly be confronted with it is...unsettling."

Bucky brushed a hand across his cheek, wiping a tear that lingered in the corner of Sam's eye with the tip of his thumb.

"I know Sam. Believe me I know."

"Just because you know, it makes it a little easier," Sam said quickly, grabbing Bucky's hand and intertwining his fingers with his. "It's so hard and painful, but you help me. You of all people know what it's like to feel guilty when rationally you know you're not."

Bucky continued to hold Sam's hand tightly, scrutinizing his face, torn between overwhelming elation that Sam had been able to trust him so much, and bitter sadness that he needed to. His need to protect Sam was stronger than ever and it broke his heart to think of the pain Sam must have carried inside him without being able to express it.

Because words were not enough to describe the emotion that was overwhelming him, he lifted Sam's chin and chose to express everything he felt in another way. He took Sam's face in his hands and pressed soft kisses to his cheeks before putting his lips to Sam's and kissing him gently and slowly. Sam put his arms around Bucky and responded to the kiss with the same gentleness until Bucky broke the kiss and said his mouth against Sam's.

"I love you."

Sam didn't answer, he just hugged Bucky tighter and put his head in his neck. They stayed in that embrace until the sun came up. They let its warm rays erase the last shadows of that night before returning to their home.

They were to face another day, together, their hearts happy to know that they would no longer face this life alone. That they would protect this life, together, with all the power, love and hope they possessed. ______

I'm still exploring their relationship, I know my writing is simple and wonky, but I'm learning.

Thank you for reading.