#23 and I still play roblox

[baeblabering]

My baby’s 💋

[vampyrbatss]

To quickly disperse any confusion I'm having at the moment, Is your Roblox Oc in DW your age or around the main cast's age? As I am struggling to decipher whether or not they follow your age Sorry if I am assuming that your Player is also a minor

Heyo! Sorry for taking my time with my reply. I have been very busy and also have been slowly posting my doodle world art that I have been doing while playing the game!

Sorry if there has been a misunderstanding, saw all the reposts going on with my art.

My character/oc/player is pretty much a self insert. Based off of me. Who is 23 yes. They are pretty much a mix of me. And my roblox avatar. And just things I think are cute haha.

I draw them with mr. Riffraff/shipped with mr. Riffraff cause I like him. I take some of the more neutral dialog as very positive just because of my avatars expression. So to me the story felt very much like he likes Mr. Riffraff and Mr. Riffraff likes him. It's fine if other people don't that's chill. Player is a bit of a self insert imo so that's what it is for me!!

As for the rest of the 'main' cast being teenagers i thought/think/draw them as adults, not minors. I wasn't aware there was Canon ages for the characters. I'm very new to the game and have just gotten into it and been enjoying it a lot!

Hopefully the reference for "Vampyr" helps. He is mostly drawn short because he's a bat. And he's based off of more so big eared bats. Which tend to be smaller!!! [Mega bats tend to have smaller bat ears]

I hope you enjoy my content though still! I have more to post I'm just slow haha. Thanks for reading everything if you did!!

[sockssketchingshack]

So uh. I never really did an intro soooo

I see a lot of people asking about commissions and I am here to tell you that I don't do them! They stress me out! Sorry but they're Scary. But I do drawing *requests*. Because I like drawing things without any form of pressure to draw them!

Now that's out of the way, hello there! My name is Socrates. But everyone calls me socks.

I am an adult! 18 years old, April 23 2006.

My pronouns are he/him!

I am both a trans man and bisexual!

Things you should know:

I have low to severe functioning autism. Meaning I need help from those outside of my own self. Basically help with my day to day life and for scary situations such as talking to strangers IRL. Or complex decisions such as bank details or that kinda thing. I need others to help me!

That doesn't mean I'm not smart though. I'm mostly slow. I call it rebooting. So if I ever take a while to respond it's probably because I'm thinking about what to say!

I have bipolar disorder. I deal mostly with mood swings one minute ranting about how cute my cat is the next minute crying over how cute my cat is.

I deal with a lot of doctors! Two or more appointments a week! So if I tell you multiple times over a short span of time I can't talk cause I'm going to the doctor's it's not an overused excuse! It's true!

I have severe anxiety. Meaning any communication at all stresses me out. But I still really wanna try to socialize!

I have memory issues.

So if you wanna talk I'm welcome to it. I'm just really, really, shy. And sometimes I'll panic and end conversations out of nowhere. So if you ever wanna talk all I ask is to be understanding and a lil patient.

And if you talk to me long enough I'll grow to trust you! Which means I'll feel more comfortable and calm when talking to you!

About my art:

I love art! But it's hard to do since I have some physical problems. But I do it anyway! I mainly draw things I like or request / challenges I receive. I like to draw my little persona alot because he's simple and easy to draw. I also have a lot of OC's! Ask me about them! I love them all and will be over the moon to share their stories outside of just the art I make of them!

About my text posts:

Text posts are semi common. It's mostly little ramblings or rants. Or just how I'm feeling. But again I mostly posts art.

If I ever interact with you or your posts:

It means I wanna talk to you but don't know how so I just try to show affection with hearts and sometimes if I'm brave enough a comment or reply. But I still really wanna learn to socialize with you!

Hobbies:

Art, cooking, baking, gardening, sewing, video games.

Lastly:

Ask me stuff! Talk to me if ya want! I am lonely. And I love you! And I'm proud of you! Take care of yourself! You deserve it! Bye! Love you!

Things I like (extra bit):

Get ready it's a long lists,

anime!

Any anime really even if I haven't seen it! I have watched a bit of or completed, Naruto, one piece, jujutsu keisen, Ouran host club, black clover, sword art online, attack on Titan, Yuri on ice, one punch man, my hero academia, assassination classroom, food wars, pokemon, the promised Neverland. And a bit more I'm probably forgetting.

Video games!

Any video game really! Even if I haven't played it! But I have played or watched others play: stardew valley, undertale, Minecraft, Roblox, terraria, cult of the lamb, overwatch 2, dead by daylight, Skyrim, halo, rocket League, cod black ops 2 zombies, moonlighter, hollow night, sky children of the light, don't starve together, subnautica, subnautica below zero, alot of different Pokemon games, five nights at Freddy's, astroneer, monster hunters, and one of my absolute all time favorites SLIME RANCHER!

other medias / things, TV shows, books, etc:

Percy Jackson, a bit of harry potter, marvel universe, DC universe, amazing digital circus, don't hug me I'm scared, Steven universe, avatar the last Airbender, we bear bears, and more I'm probably forgetting.

That's all bye.

[mary-games-and-arts]

OC's Masterpost

Well, here are all of my OCs and my Sona and some info about them (colors of the names above them are their base stick colors)

Rivalry Of a Creator And a Creation

Mary (She/They, hollowhead) - 15 y.o. | An unfortunate victim of being tortured by a cruel creator April. Successfully escaped from her in 2018(a week after Showdown) and was taken care of by Chosen. Now she just chills with Chosen and Dark and has a bestie Lenny (I know Mary's my Sona but I gave her a different backstory cuz yes) Winter design here

April (She/her) - 19 y.o. | Mary's cruel creator that had no empathy for her own creation. She googled every life-threatening thing to test them out on that poor stickfigure. Gladly she suffered consequences from her actions

A Relationship Of A Human And An Enderman + MT's Boyfriend

Hazel/Henry (She/They, hollowhead) - 16 y.o. | A teenager who ran away from their strict parents to find a better life. Lives with their girlfriend Ellie who is a kind Enderman that accepts them as who they are

Ellie (She/They, fullhead) - 19 y.o. | An Enderman with unique abilities of being immune to water and turning into a stickfigure. Jacob is her best friend. She's the one who found Hazel and decided to help her. Now Hazel is her girlfriend

Jacob (He/him, fullhead) - 21 y.o. | A silly boi and MT's husband. He's an ordinary Enderman, but also can turn into a stickfigure. His bestie is Ellie. Likes adventures

From Enemies to Besties

Pinkie (She/her, fullhead) - 16 y.o. | A caring girl that has her abilities from her necklace. She's (non-canonically) Yellow's twin sister and after finding each other she visits her. Cyan was her enemy at first cuz of different teams, but now that everything's over and teams have been disbanded, Pinkie gave him a chance to get better. Now they're besties and they share a blog called @pinkie-and-cyan

Cyan (He/him, fullhead) - 15 y.o. | Pinkie's past enemy that became a better person and let go of the past. He still has flashbacks, but rarely. Has power thanks to Pinkie

The Games Sisters

Anita (She/her, fullhead) - 18 y.o. | An older sister who specializes in Minecraft. She enjoys that game and also lives in it. Likes adventures and her sisters are Alice and Mia.

Alice (They/them, hollowhead) - 17 y.o | Middle sibling who enjoys playing Roblox's different experiences and games. Sometimes visits their sisters Anita and Mia

Mia (She/they, fullhead) - 13 y.o. | A younger sister that adores Geometry Dash. She's a silly fella who just hates dual portals. Is a really curious kid, but gets into trouble sometimes. She also has a special ability to turn into a cube and a stickfigure or a human, depending on an environment. Sometimes forgets that she has 2 sisters

The Guardian of The Galaxy and A Nightmare + The Sealer

Vivian (She/her, hollowhead) - 23 y.o. | A guardian of the Galaxy who observes everything in the cosmos. Sometimes she would come into someone's dreams to warn them about something bad that would happen to them soon

Nightmare Mary (She/They, hollowhead) - 15 y.o. | An evil version of Mary, created by April. She's (non-canonically) a team of the Victim's Rocket Corporation. Her goal is to find Mary and bring her back to April so that she would continue her suffering.

The Sealer (She/It, hollowhead) - ?? y.o. | (An OC inspired by The Keeper by @/thedeservedone). A monster that lives in a cave and considers it her home. She would seal anyone who dares to enter her place

The Anon Duo

Prankster Anon 2/Lenny Flower (She/her, fullhead) - 24 y.o. | A silly prankster and Mary's bestie. She's also friends with Andrew and his friends (@pranksteranon) Loves adventures and sometimes is overprotective over Mary. Has a separate blog @prankster-anon-2

Minty The Anon (She/They, fullhead) - 16 y.o. | Eh, just an Anon sona who enjoys drawing and can sometimes visit someone's blog

Smol Kids Trio

Glace (He/him, fullhead) - 13 y.o. | A little shy boy but is super overprotective when it comes to protect his little sister Janet and his friend Cotton

Janet (She/her, hollowhead) - 11 y.o. | An energetic girl who would spend all day having fun with her brother Glace and her friend Cotton

Cotton (She/They, fullhead) - 8 y.o. | A child who was a victim of The Chosen One's and The Dark Lord's actions back in 2014. She was stuck in the Void after passing out, and waited for 7 years for her chance to return back to life. Turns out, she was in a coma for 7 years. She got the ability to see ghosts after she woke up, though. Now she's living with Glace and Janet. Full backstory here

[digiships]

🌊 CUPID 🌊

HE/IT/PAW 🪼 23 🐬 WHITE & ABLEBODIED & AUTIHD

more info under the cut!

DNI: pro/comship, age down self inserts/age up characters for selfshipping, under 16, transmed/truscum, ship with racist/rapist characters, racebend your self insert, erase canon orientations, are weird to ppl who arent ok sharing, etcetcetc be normal

BYF:

- if i softblock you, chances are either A. we share an f/o i have unlisted that youre not comfortable sharing or B. you share an f/o with my partner or qpp!! it's nothing personal!

- please tag posts that talk abt f/os as if theyre real people with "unreality"! example: a post saying "your f/o feels your love for them across universes", i have ocd and that kind of thing is Bad for me mentally

- yes some of these characters are "yanderes" and/or are from media made by pr0sh1pp3rs, this does NOT mean i am pr0sh1p. i am vehemently against any of that kind of content and am still disgusted by it. i selfship w these characters for coping reasons that i'm not going to list out here, but if it's important for you to know you're more than welcome to dm me/send an ask off-anon!! i actively avoid engaging w the creators and the fandoms and i stay in my little corner playing w them like dolls. if this still makes you uncomfortable then please hardblock me, do what you need to stay safe!!

* - ok with sharing!

bold - NO sharing Ever sorry

Main F/O's:

^ im ok sharing Most f/os if we're already mutuals, but if we r strangers i will block you So sorry . if im still not ok w it i will just blacklist your ship tag if u have one! tldr mutuals i love you

full list here!

🌌 Kurt Wagner - X-Men

🍎 Wally Darling - Welcome Home

🍑 Sun Wukong - you know

🌺 Vash the Stampede - Trigun

🎤 Natsuki Shinomiya - Uta no Prince-Sama

🪽 Dick Grayson - DC

💳 Mammon - Obey Me

🔥 Caleb Widogast - Critical Role

🖍️ Sunny Day Jack - Something's Wrong With Sunny Day Jack

🩶 Pe.ter Dun.bar - Yo.ur Bo.yfrie.nd*

🌱 Law.rence Ole.ander - Bo.yfrie.nd to De.ath 2

🔪 John Doe - Mortisfox*

🦇 Rei Sakuma - Ensemble Stars

⚔️ Future Trunks - Dragon Ball Z/Super

Other F/Os:

🌐 Gamma 2 - Dragon Ball Super

🍖 Son Goku - Dragon Ball series*

💎 Demiurge - Overlord

🧸 Toki Wartooth - Metalocalypse

👁️ Jonathan Sims - The Magnus Archives

☁️ Martin Blackwood - The Magnus Archives

🖲 HAL9000 - 2001:ASO

🩸 Ve.ssel - Sl.eep Tok.en

🔮 Gale Dekarios - Baldur's Gate 3*

❤️‍🩹 Astarion - Baldur's Gate 3*

🐻 Halsin - Baldur's Gate 3

🗡 Wyll Ravengard - Baldur's Gate 3*

💣 Hi.romu Taka.hashi - NJ.PW

👹 Ka.ne - W.WF

🦷 Ma.nkind - W.WF

📌 Floyd - Trolls

🍦 Kaito - Vocaloid

🔑 Chilchuck Tims - Dungeon Meshi

🌤 Dogday - Poppy Playtime

🔫 Pico - Newgrounds

👢 Boothill - Honkai Star Rail

🧨 Scar - Wuthering Waves

💐 Pim Pimling - Smiling Friends

⚾ Kenji Sato - Ultraman Rising

🟪 Infected/Kasper - Regretevator (Roblox)*

⚪ Wallter - Regretevator (Roblox)*

🐟 Sebastian Solace - Pressure (Roblox)

👔 Aaron Hotchner - Criminal Minds

🧤 Spencer Reid - Criminal Minds

📱 Derek Morgan - Criminal Minds

Crushes:

👒 Luffy - One Piece

🃏 Bittergiggle - Garten of Banban

🥊 Banban/Uthman - Garten of Banban

💤 Geshu Lin - Wuthering Waves

Familial F/Os

🎸 Dethklok + CFO - Metalocalypse

🍷 Sebas Tian - Overlord

🐛 Piccolo - Dragon Ball series

🛡 Vegeta - Dragon Ball Z/Super

🌟 Daycare Attendant - FNAF:SB

- ☀️ Sun, 🌙 Moon, 🌗 Eclipse

[mbat]

giving up on the hunt event with 77 lol

i could be a weirdo and try to do the last 23 i need in this last 7 hours but im very tired and the ones ive been avoiding are the ones i already know would suck anyway. i only found out about this event with like a week left and i kept doing other things irl anyway

the event is generally very underwhelming and disappointing, nothing about it says easter, not the branding or the colors or almost any of the missions. some of the games kinda got the idea with making you collect eggs or bunnies but they still felt weirdly empty about it, probably because they were clearly just slapped into a pre-existing game and not much else was done.

truly the egg hunts imo peaked at 2017-2018, though i never got to experience the earliest ones so i cant speak on those

most of the games kinda sucked, though some were pretty good. tbh im just glad i had an excuse to play 3008 again, it was the last one i did because i knew id like it lol

am i the only one who sees someone do a bad job on something and it makes you want to do it yourself because you think you could do better, even if you otherwise dont care about the subject? i know i definitely couldnt and yet the urge is still there

i just continue to feel disappointed by roblox these last few years, i only got to experience better days on the website for 4-5 years out of my 13 years, but it sticks out so much more to me because it was better. the moment they removed tix was the beginning of the end, it was such a blatant insult to anyone who isnt willing to pour real money into this game for whatever reasons apply. they couldve tried to change the tix system instead of removing it, if they had to change it at all, but whatever

tl;dr, UGH.

[smolsammichowo]

Time for a stupid 4 am long post that I’d usually vomit out on twitter but I can type out more shit on tumblr :O

Well uh,

To everyone who has recently followed me on here who is NOT from my Twitter or anywhere else that I linked my tumblr on and just found me from somewhere,

Thanks for following me & also  Sorry for me constantly screaming about random bullshit such as 

- Minecraft Stuff / Minecraft content / Minecraft stream lore / minecraft streamers 

- (note , while I’m not a fan of dream, I have no problem if you are a fan of dream. Just as long as you are kind to others & are kind to me. That should just be common sense really though. ) 

Pro wrestling (Ive mainly talked about AEW & WWE but I do like stuff such as Impact, NJPW, Lucha Underground, Dragon Gate, and a few others! Feel free to dm me some other pro wrestling stuff that you think I’d like too ! ) 

- (note - favorite pro wrestler is a guy named Pac. Gonna confuse the shit out of minecraft people given theres a content creator named Pac as well in the minecraft content creator space lmao. Though the pro wrestler calls himself BASTARD pac as well so I can just call the wrestler BastardPac to not confuse y’all lol ) 

Anime (if I list the animes I like this list would become a fucking dictionary)

Genshin (Tumblr seems SO SO SO SO CALM compared to Twitter , BLESS YOU ALL ) 

Pokemon (seems like a lot of you have followed me from either minecraft or this! Hello! Im doing a pokedex project but i keep redoing it as I keep feeling self concious about my art ; v ; ) 

- Top 5 favorite pokemon not in order are Chikorita, Togekiss, Alolan Raichu,  Koraidon, & Reuniclus

Splatoon (got into the game this year and its like a drug to me now. I adore the paintbrush weapon even though the reef bow is the one Im closest to getting a 5 star on as that one is the money maker ) 

Roblox ( A middle school thing that never left me. Im 23 still playing it. Though its how I made my online persona that is kinda my fursona)

Furry stuff  (o hey speaking of that stuff)

MLP ( Funny enough this ties into above as this was the butterfly effect of me finding the fanbase because of a dumb fanfiction about pinkiepie being hannable lector & making horse cupcakes. ) 

Typing dumb shit at 3 - 4 am in the morning SUCH AS THIS . 

Anyhow I need to stop procrastinating and get a piece of art Ive been working on since yesterday night done. 

Love y’all, just wanted to post a little bit about myself to people who dont really know about me that thought it was a good idea to follow me. 

[an-j8]

1. Anj

2. One year ?

3. Chiken masala 😮‍💨

4. Indien ! ( grenadine and orangina)

5. Yes

6. 2 cats !

7. 1000+

8. One 🙂‍↕️ French only

9. Back to the futur !

10. Play Roblox lol

11. Ambivert

12. Idk maybe kompa ?

13. Martinique 🇲🇶

14. Drawning

15. depends on the person who talke to me

16. Nop

17. Straight

18. A song of ice and fire, Harry Potter, kotlc

19. Erm sadly

20. Single I’m a lone wolf ( it’s a joke pls laugh)

21. Ig

22. the pajama evenings that I spend with my friends (I live in a different country than them so it’s rare and I miss them)

23. Flashback 🤣

24. Yes that will and mike don't end up together in stranger things

25. I’m a Night person

26. 10k 😬

27. Nick ( zootopia), mo ( mia and me), Mike wheeler ( still do), flyn rider ( you know )

28. omg eat near the beach at night

30. watching byler / got edits all day 😔

Let your followers get to know you asks <3

What's your name?

For how long you have this account?

Favourite food?

Favourite drink?

Do you have any siblings?

Do you have pets?

How old are you?

How many languages do you know?

What's your all time favourite movie/tv show?

What are you enjoying to do in your free time?

Are you an introvert or an extrovert?

Your favourite music genres?

Your dream place to visit?

Something you wish you were better at?

How long do you take to respond to texts?

Do you have any tattoos? If not, would like to?

What's your sexuality?

Do you like reading? If yes what's your favourite book?

Have you ever been in love?

What's your relationship status?

Have you ever been heartbroken?

Best memory you could think of?

Worst memory you can think of?

Do you have any fears?

Are you a morning or a night person?

How many pictures you have on your phone?

Who was your favourite childhood crush?

Are you a romantic?

What’s your dream date?

What are your hobbies?

[cellophobia]

pinned post!

hi i'm jazzy !! 😁😁

i'm 23 and have used tumblr since i was 11 so my brain is pretty fried

i am ftmtf (aka i detransitioned) and heterosexual (i luv my husband 😍). i use she/her pronouns!

i don't know whether i consider myself fully cis or not but in the meantime i do still see myself as queer

i play gamez like toontown rewritten, roblox, the sims 3, mario kart 8 deluxe, splatoon, and minecraft. i also have a fuckton of games on steam that i just never play or have already finished lol. feel free to msg me if you wanna play any of these games together!

also i have Mental Illness (bipolar) and i vent my feelings a lot on here so if ur bothered by that, you can blacklist #bpthingz. my personal text post tag in general is cello.txt!

here's my letterboxd if u wanna follow me :3

thx for reading!

[carriethecakerealedition]

im back on the grind of searching for this game .

let me copy paste from my my wattpad book :

" okay so its like . a sad story on roblox , as it was made during the time sad stories were popular i think ? the only major characters i remember are in order : billie , lamp and gyco lizard

its stupid i know please stay with me here , but it mightve been made to mock stereotypical sad stories since the entire game looks like a joke in general . it follows the classic story format : multiple square boxes made to continue the story from the previous box .

a few details i remember based on my screenshots is that lamp dies from a gun , billie and gyco lizard get .. married i think ?? , gyco lizard was abandoned by their parents or caretakers , billie ' s hamster turns into a fucking monster and thats all i rlly remember

it was called something like " sad story ;( " and it had around ... 4 parts ?

i cant find it at ALL , even thougg i found it in like 2022 - 23 so i dont know if it was deleted or its still there "

.. guess what . i found the very few screenshots i have from this game , so i 'm gonna share it with you all !

additional note :

i remember albert / flamingo played this game , but i myself am not sure since i ' ve watched ALL of his sad story videos

[snowysosturn]

Speeding Car - Matt Sturniolo Part 10

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Part 14 Part 15 Part 16 Part 17 Part 18 Part 19 Part 20 Part 21 Part 22 Part 23 Part 24 Part 25 Part 26 Part 27 Part 28 Part 29

Pairing : y/n x Matt Sturniolo

Summary : After six years with your boyfriend Alex, you start mentally check out. At a UCLA party, Alex reconnects with his childhood friend Emily, who proposes a double date with her boyfriend Matt. Your attraction to Matt grows as he pays you the first real attention you've had in years, sparking a complicated emotional journey.

Warnings : MDNI, arguments, cursing, unhappy relationship, tension, not feeling good enough, being let down

Matt POV

Emily was sprawled across my bed, her phone held lazily in her hand as she scrolled through her Instagram feed. She sighed, as she turned to look at me. “Can you believe it’s been four weeks since Alex’s fight? It feels like it just happened yesterday.” She mused, a faint smile playing on her lips.

“Yeah, it’s crazy..” I replied, half distracted as I was setting up Roblox on my computer. We were preparing to film a new YouTube video later that day, and I was trying to get everything in order. But Emily’s presence always had a way of pulling my attention away, whether I wanted it to or not.

She stretched, tossing her phone backwards onto the bed. “I still need to pack for Barcelona,” She said with a sigh. “I’ve been putting it off all week.”

I looked up at her, arching an eyebrow. “You leave tomorrow morning and you haven’t packed yet?”

“Of course not?” She laughed, as if the idea of being organized was completely foreign to her. “I’ll order an Uber back to my dorm and get it done.”

I nodded, already mentally preparing for the peace and quiet that would come when she left. As much as I cared about Emily, recently I needed space. Space to think, to breathe. Space to stop feeling so conflicted all the time.

“Oh, and don’t forget!” Emily added, her voice casual as she sat up and began tapping away on her phone. “Alex is staying here tonight.”

I forced a smile. “Yep, I remember.”

She got up from the bed, smoothing down her clothes. “I’ll let you know when I’m done packing so you can pick me up. We can grab Alex on the way back.”

“Sure thing..” I said, watching as she gathered her things. As she left, I couldn’t help but feel a strange sense of relief, mixed with something else, something that had been nagging at me ever since that night in the hospital. The night when I realized I was feeling things I shouldn’t be feeling.

As the door clicked shut behind her, Chris turned to me with a box of camera equipment in his hands. He looked at me, then glanced at the door. “Alex is staying over tonight?” He asked, a slight edge to his voice.

“Yeah..” I sighed “I’m giving them a ride to the airport in the morning so Emily thought it would make more sense if they both stay here, since we’re closer to the airport.”

Before I could respond, Nick burst into the room, interrupting our conversation. “Speaking of Alex.” He said, his tone serious. “I’ve got a bone to pick with you!”

I blinked, completely caught off guard. “What are you talking about?”

Nick crossed his arms, leaning against the kitchen island as he stared at me. “I’ve been keeping this a secret since the night of the fight..” He began, his voice low but intense. “When you and Emily came home that night, I heard everything she said to you about Y/n. About how you’re “not allowed” to hang out with her anymore.”

I felt a chill run down my spine, my mind flashing back to that night. The tension, the way Emily had drunkenly demanded that I didn’t hang out with Y/n “alone” but yet never asked me to hang out with the 3 of them either. “I.. I didn’t know you heard that..” I stammered, trying to process what Nick was saying.

“I thought you might have noticed I was there” Nick said, his expression hardening. “Since when I tried to sneak back into my room, the motherfucking floor creaked.”

I let out a breath I didn’t realize I’d been holding, running a hand through my hair. “Look Nick, I get where you’re coming from, but Emily is my girlfriend.. I have to respect her boundaries.”

“Bullshit.” Nick snapped, pushing off the island and stepping closer to me. “You’re following her orders, not respecting her boundaries. There’s a difference, Matt. You’re letting her control who you can and can’t be friends with. And that’s not okay.”

Chris stayed silent, his eyes darting between us, sensing the tension in the room.

Nick continued, his voice softer now but still filled with emotion. “I could see how well you and Y/n got along. She’s a good person, Matt. She doesn’t deserve to be cut off just because Emily’s feeling insecure. And it’s not just about you, either. I was starting to build a friendship with Y/n too. Just because you’re not allowed to be friends with her doesn’t mean I’m not.”

His words hit me like a punch to the gut. I hadn’t realized how deeply this whole situation had affected Nick too. But hearing him lay it all out like that, I knew he was right to a degree. I’d been trying so hard to keep the peace with Emily that I’d lost sight of what was fair and what wasn’t.

“Nick..” I started, but he cut me off.

“No, Matt. You need to think about what’s really important here. And if Emily really loved you, she wouldn’t be putting you in a position where you have to choose between her and your friends.”

I stood there, speechless, as Nick turned and walked out of the room, leaving me alone to mull over the conversation. Chris gave me a sympathetic look but didn’t say anything. He knew better than to get involved when things got this heavy.

I knew Nick meant well in what he said, but he didn’t know what I knew and matter of fact, neither did Emily.

Y/n’s POV

I placed the last shirt into Alex’s suitcase, carefully folding it to make sure everything fit perfectly and that his bag wasn't over weight. His flight wasn’t until the morning, but I wanted to make sure he had everything ready - the right clothes, his passport, all the paperwork for the trip. I’d even slipped in a few of his favorite snacks, knowing how he got restless on long flights. As I zipped up the suitcase, a small smile tugged at the corners of my mouth. Maybe tonight we could actually spend some quality time together. I’d been looking forward to it, especially since this would be our last night together before he left for ten days.

I walked out of the bedroom, finding Alex in the living room scrolling through his phone. “Hey..” I said, trying to sound casual as I leaned against the doorframe. “You’re all packed.. I figured we could order in tonight, watch a movie or something? You know, just spend some time together before you leave.”

Alex barely looked up from his phone, and when he did, his expression was unreadable. “Uh, actually… I’m staying at Matt’s place tonight.”

The words hung in the air between us, and I felt my heart drop. “Matt’s?” I thought to myself.

“What? Why?”

“Emily’s packing at her dorm, and Matt’s giving us a ride to the airport in the morning. It just makes more sense for me to stay over there tonight” He explained, his tone dismissive, as if it was the most logical thing in the world.

I stared at him, feeling my chest go on fire. “But it’s our last night together before you go. I thought we could at lesst spend some quality time together tonight.”

Alex sighed, clearly not understanding why this was a big deal. “It’s just one night, babe. I’ll be back before you know it.”

“One night?” I repeated, my voice trembling with the effort to keep my emotions in check. “Alex, you’re leaving for ten days. This is the last time we’ll get to see each other before then, and you’re choosing to spend it with Matt and Emily?”

He put his phone down, finally giving me his full attention, but there was a look of impatience in his eyes. “It’s not like I’m ditching you. I’m doing this because it’s convenient.”

I shook my head, the resentment I’d been holding back for weeks finally bubbling to the surface. “Convenient for who? For you? Because it sure as fuck isn’t convenient for me. I’ve spent the last four weeks taking care of you, Alex. I’ve adjusted my shifts so I’m working either at the crack ass of dawn or into the depths of the night, i’ve cooked all your your meals, driven you to and from class, and done your assignments even though I don’t even fucking go to college. I’ve bent over backwards for you, and now you can’t even give me one night?”

He looked at me, stunned, as if he hadn’t realized how much I’d been carrying. “Y/n I appreciate everything you’ve done, but you’re overreacting.”

“Overreacting?” I felt a hot tear slide down my cheek, and I quickly wiped it away. “Do you have any idea how it feels to never be a priority in your life? I’ve tried so hard Alex, but no matter what I do, I’m never enough. You’re always putting other people before me. And now, on the last night we could have had together, you’re leaving me alone.”

His expression shifted to one of frustration. “You’re not the only one who’s had to adjust, Y/n. I’ve been through a lot too, with the injury and everything. I need my friends, and I need to be there too. It’s not all about you.”

His words hit me like a slap in the face, and I felt the last bit of resolve in me snap. “It’s not about me? You wouldn’t even be injured if you hadn’t blown me off that night to go out drinking with your team! None of this would have happened if you’d just kept your plans with me!”

Alex’s face hardened, his eyes narrowing. “So this is what it’s about? You’re still mad about that? I’m sorry, okay? I didn’t know it was going to turn into a fight. But you can’t keep holding that over my head.”

“I’m not holding anything over your head.” I shot back. “I’m just trying to make you see that you keep making choices that hurt me, that push me away. And I’m tired, Alex. I’m tired of feeling like I’m never good enough for you.”

For a moment, there was silence between us, the weight of everything I’d just said sinking in. Alex opened his mouth to respond, but before he could say anything, his phone buzzed. He glanced at it, and I saw Emily’s name flash on the screen.

“They’re outside..” He muttered, more to himself than to me, as he walked past me into the bedroom to grab his suitcases.

I couldn’t believe it. We were in the middle of a serious conversation. Our relationship was practically crumbling in front of us, and he was just going to leave? Just like that?

“You’re really going to walk out on me right now?” I asked, my voice cracking with disbelief.

Alex hesitated for a split second, then looked at me with a mixture of guilt and annoyance. “We’ll talk when I get back, okay? I just.. I have to go. I can’t keep them waiting.”

Without waiting for a response, he turned and headed for the door. I watched as he left the apartment, the door clicking shut behind him. Not a hug or a goodbye kiss, no form of reassurance at all.

The silence that filled the room was deafening. I sank down onto the couch, the tears became hysterical as the reality of the situation hit me.

I wasn’t enough for him. I’d never be enough for him. And the worst part was, I just had to sit with it.

What hurt me also was Matt hanging out with Alex. I hadn’t heard from him in a month, he seen how upset Alex made me that night, I opened up to him. What had happened in such a short space of time?

Matt’s POV

I sat on the edge of my bed, watching as Chris and Nick wrapped up the last bit of filming. We’d spent the evening working on a new video, we played Dress To Impress on Roblox, and all of my outfits were shit. Just as Nick made a final comment into the camera, my phone buzzed on the nightstand beside me. I reached over and saw Emily’s name on the screen.

Emily: “I’ll be done packing in about 15 minutes. Can you come pick me up? x”

I sighed, running a hand through my hair. “Looks like I’m off on chauffeur duty.” I muttered to myself, a faint smile tugging at my lips. “Emily’s ready to be picked up.”

“Fun times!” Chris joked, shutting off the camera. “You want company?”

“Nah, I got it.” I replied quickly. “It’ll be easier if I pick up Alex first, then swing by Emily’s place.”

Nick raised an eyebrow but didn’t comment. I could tell he was still thinking about the argument from earlier. I didn’t want to dive into that mess again right now. I grabbed my keys and headed out, hoping to avoid more drama tonight.

As I drove towards Y/n and Alex’s apartment, a part of me hoped I might catch a glimpse of Y/n. I felt a wave of longing as I realized how much I’d missed seeing her in the past few weeks. I shouldn’t be feeling this way, I knew that. But something about Y/n made me question things I hadn’t thought twice about before.

When I pulled up outside the apartment complex, I realized that I didn’t actually have Alex’s number. Shit. Look like i’ll have to go up and knock on their door. It wasn’t a big deal, but the idea of possibly seeing Y/n again, even briefly, made my heart race.

I stepped out of the car and made my way up to the front door. As I raised my hand to knock, though, I heard voices inside. Loud ones. I froze, realizing that Y/n and Alex were arguing.

“It’s not like I’m ditching you. I’m doing this because it’s convenient.” I heard Alex said defensively.

“Convenient for who? For you? Because it sure as fuck isn’t convenient for me. I’ve spent the last four weeks taking care of you, Alex. I’ve adjusted my shifts so i’m working either at the crack ass of dawn or into the depths of the night, i’ve cooked all your your meals, driven you to and from class, and done your assignments even though I don’t even fucking go to college. I’ve bent over backwards for you, and now you can’t even give me one night?” Y/n’s voice, thick with emotion, sliced through the door.

She’s been doing all of that for him?

“Y/n I appreciate everything you’ve done, but you’re overreacting.” Alex snapped back, sounding more annoyed than apologetic.

“Overreacting?” I hear her voice break. “Do you have any idea how it feels to never be a priority in your life? I’ve tried so hard Alex, but no matter what I do, I’m never enough.”

My heart clenched as I listened. I knew I shouldn’t be standing there, eavesdropping on such a private moment, and what I had just heard made me want to leave. Hearing Y/n’s pain, feeling the rawness in her voice, it was like a punch to the gut.

I turned on my heel and headed back down the stairs, moving quickly towards my car. I needed to get out of there, away from the fight that was echoing in my mind. I felt awful, like I’d just intruded on something sacred. As much as I wanted to check on Y/n, to make sure she was okay, I knew I couldn’t. Not without crossing lines I wasn’t ready to cross.

I drove to Emily’s dorm straight away, the words I’d overheard replaying in my mind. I had to let this man stay in my home tonight, after knowing how much he’d upset Y/n again.

Emily was already waiting outside when I pulled up, her phone in one hand and a suitcase in the other. She climbed into the passenger seat, flashing me a quick smile. “Thanks for coming to get me” She said, leaning over to give me a peck on the cheek.

“No problem” I replied, forcing a smile. I started driving back towards Alex and Y/n’s place, the tension in my chest tightening with each passing minute.

“So, how was filming?” Emily asked, breaking the silence.

“Fine.. We finished up just before you text.” I said, keeping my voice even. I didn’t want to make it seem like anything was wrong, Emily didn’t need to know what I’d overheard, or the storm of thoughts swirling in my head.

When we arrived back at the apartment, I didn’t get out of the car this time. I couldn’t bring myself to go back up there. Instead, Emily shot Alex a quick text, letting him know we were outside.

A few minutes later, Alex appeared, his expression hard and his movements stiff. I could see the anger plastered all over his face, you could almost feel the anger radiating off of him as he climbed into the back seat.

“You okay?” I asked, glancing at Alex through the rearview mirror.

“Fine,” Alex grumbled, but it was clear that he was anything but.

a/n : ooof nearly everyone’s arguing 😬 buckle uppppp!

taglist : @muwapsturniolo @anitahunt @sturnfannn @jayde510 @chrissfavhoe @babyalliah-777 @v33angel @urmom69lol @willowrites @ribread03 @2muchofaslvt @sturnsaver @sleepysturniolo @jcsturniolo11 @jessie-essie @hoeforchrizz @mynbbys @sturniolopanini @mattsturnxoxo @delicatechrry @t77te @sturnsyaper69 @hotdismylife @maggot3647 @ivysturnss @noplaceissafeanymore @mattssgf @hottiirr @maethem0nth @sillyponygrl @mattyblover07 @imjusthereforthesturniolosmut

[behindnightmaresanddreams]

And just to be double clear, noob is just a shortened form of Newbie, and typically derogatory (or at the very least, not friendly). Typically status of noob is assigned based on skill rather than actual time spent playing the game, but because it's spread, some players do use it to mean literally "You're new and haven't played much" especially in non-fighting social games. In Roblox for instance, the default skin was a yellow head arms and legs with blue torso, and was always called a noob because they were, literally, new. Too new to customize their avatar even. As the game turned more towards pay to customize (previously players earned free in game currency daily) the term noob declined from use in the game, though you can still get called one despite that. In games like Paladins or Overwatch it is mostly based on skill (or, often, perceived skill. I've gone 23/0/18KDA 80k heals in a match and still got called a noob because I didn't heal them specifically.) but often despite skill players will use it, especially if you're using a default skin and/or loadout.

[keefwho]

April 23 - 2024 Tuesday

11:08pm

6.5/10

This morning I gave Sporticus a bath. There was a big spider in the shower the whole time I couldn't seem to wash down the drain but it didn't bother me too much. She shed a TON of hair this time around. I also found out later that she peed in the corner of my room, likely after her bath while I was taking a shower. For breakfast I made a jimmy dean sandwich with rice and a pear cup. I intended on doing my workout today and this was a good breakfast for it calorie-wise. I watch an episode of Moral Orel about Doughy being neglected.

For work I warmed up with sketches of wolves. They didn't turn out as good as others and I found out that their front legs aren't easily simplified. Also that they are very similar to horses at certain joints. Then I spent another hour on the Venus commission coloring the characters. And then I finished preparing my next NSFW YCH.

After work I did my dishes and started my workout. I watched a video of Dan Schneider while I did a few sets of lunges and a couple miles on the treadmill. I found out my knee still hurts, I MAY have to schedule a doctor's appointment for it. Although I haven't given it an opportunity for some good rest so I should probably try to take it mega easy for a couple weeks before asking a doctor. For lunch I made chicken stew. I was aiming to make it rich and spicy but ended up making it too salty somehow, I think too much lemon pepper. It was edible but not that great for the effort. While cooling/eating, TK was messaging me about issues with her boyfriend and how he has a pattern of problematic jealousy. I took her side completely with what she had to say, it sounded to me like he not only had unrealistic expectations but also that he was not communicating the problem very well. It got me thinking a lot in general about jealousy and how the dynamic can change between two people that work well together when they elevate from friends to a relationship. I think nothing SHOULD change if both parties know how to talk and don't develop unrealistic needs.

I did my afternoon work late on account of how long the stew took. I did a request for FY that I think turned out okay and then I got into VRchat to paint from "life". I went to that old world DS and I found with all the hobkin avatars and picked a place to stand that I'm going to copy from. I think it's a great idea because it's basically just a color study and results in a sort of unique result, that being what looks like an uninteresting in-game screenshot but it's actually been hand painted. After that I worked on my avatar for about 15 minutes which was enough time to prepare and bake the AO for the textures. This whole time I was using my good headphones to listen to loud rain with some music and a stream at a lower volume.

When I was done I hopped on the Roblox horse game to catch some horses and check out the training island. DS was free so we called and watched a furry species ranking video while I horse trained and she practiced airbrushing. We also finally watched the fabled balut sausage video which was horrifying, I actually thought I might throw up and had to look away. Then it was more of the usual furry con content and we went on a sidetrack trying to see if any of the footage had her in it. We found about 10 pixels of her at the waterfront in 2022, still an exciting find.

In bed we did our puzzles. The crossword was really hard for some reason and took us a whole 12 minutes. The last 2 only took a little over 1 minute each. Then it was 2 Monster High chapters and I played through the Beast's Castle level in KH2 until I got to the boss. We did a little smash or pass session with the enemies and a few actually got me thinkin a little.

~~~

Today was strange in that for most of it, I really had the desire to be alone but not to be myself. Usually when I wanna do something alone, I'm still trying to express myself. But I didn't want that today, I wanted the influence of others. The happy medium was a little bit of texting. Also since today was about "self", I combined that with my Costar prompt which was "cry over someone else's problems". So during the afternoon I was thinking a lot about TK and DS, putting myself in their shoes thinking about the woes they both expressed today. It felt good, like a helpful empathy exercise.

[blackvail22]

9/20/23 — 10:31am

"stop trying to talk to me while im on the phone! you never talk to me any other time"

i was in there for almost an hour because i wanted to talk to her about something, and she never got off the phone!! shes always talking to someone or she's asleep, and its so irritating. "stop trying to talk to me while im on the phone" while shes on the phone w her friend and they were not talking to each other. she talks to me when im on the phone, so why cant that apply to her? im tired of all of her one-sided rules just because "she's the parent, im the kid"... fuck that! i wish she would see me for more than a disability i *may* have. im so tired of it!! i dont want it to define me now, and i dont want it to define me if i get diagnosed.

i need her and my dad just a few steps out of my life, and maybe i'll be happy. i cant do that until im able to drive and have enough money to live on my own, so... oh, and my mom keeps doing everything in her power to *not* let me take my permit test, so im going to go insane!!!!

1:59pm

she keeps blaming me for everything im going to scream. the alcohol that my dad drank yesterday was 3 bottles of a 375mL, 21% alc./vol. (42 proof) drink! its one of those cheap ones you can get from the gas station. i keep flirting with my ex. he told our friend he "might" still like me, but every time i do it he just says "wat" which means 1. he didnt understand that i was flirting with him or 2. he did understand and was acting oblivious. i requested the wrong day off for work and i changed it in the app but when my boss accepted it it accepted the wrong day and not the changed day. im going to like scream and throw up. everything feels like its going downhill im losing my fucking mind. thank god i work with my friend today or else i would have a melt down at work. i am like so close to crying its not funny. i hate crying!!!! i hate crying sm. its good for me but i hate it! i need to put my medicine on the desk so i remember to take it every time i sit down or walk past it. i need to start taking it consistently again or else im going to keep going insane

also i go on vacation next month. i go on vacation next month and next month starts next week which means ITS SO CLOSE TO BEING VACATION AND I PLANNED TO MEET WITH MY EX AND I HAVE TO ASK MY PARENTS AGAIN IF WE CAN STOP ON THE WAY DOWN SO I CAN GO TO AN ARCADE WITH HIM IM LOSING ITTTT AKOIRGJLAKRGJALFKGJLRKAGJJKOI

i just took a screenshot by how hard i hit my keyboard lol

11:32pm

i just got home from work about an hour and a half ago. i had an okay day. i started to play roblox, though, since i wanted to play something that would make me feel better from earlier. when i tell you i met the nicest random ive met in a really long time, omg!! i was playing work at a pizza place and this person had this interesting house. it was called "pink hotel" and i wanted to see what it looked like, so i asked them if i could come inside and look around. it was SO COOL! i loved it sm, and the whole time the creator of the hotel was showing me around and stuff and we were talking and stuff. they had to go, but at the end they said "you are really cool to talk to, very understanding and enthusiastic" i almost fell to my knees

thats the thing i needed to hear tonight, this week, this year... like, i really needed to hear that

but the other part of me is yelling at me "if you were so understanding and enthusiastic and fun to talk to, then why dont you have many friends" and honestly, i couldnt tell you. im just going to take this win and run with it

[mbat]

this is my review of the roblox 2024 'the hunt' event, its not really necessary but i keep thinking about it so i need to get my thoughts out even if no one cares, and yes this will be a LOT of text.

important thing to note: i only found out about the hunt event when there was a week left to it. i had only stumbled upon it by luck because i decided to try playing roblox again after a few months of not playing, and had curiously clicked on the hunt button displayed pretty prominently on the side of my screen. my only regret with this event is that i didnt find out about it sooner.

this had left me with very little time to do some of these games, and so i didnt get to finish a good number of them in time, and had ended the event with only 77 badges, which is still a lot, but left me with 23 unfinished. those games will be labeled DNF (did not finish). if i had had the time, i for sure wouldve gotten the 100. 

this isnt to mention that even after i had found out about it, for several of the days that week i was busy spending time with my family and doing stuff like a normal person, so i had even less time to do it.

with that out of the way, my commentary and ranking (at the end) of the games.

Steep Steps - DNF, i didnt like this game before this event, and i didnt like it during it. some people like a challenge, but i never liked steep steps flavor of challenge, im a checkpoints kinda guy. i despise that if you fuck up, you have to start ALL. OVER. i had gotten partially up the mountain before someone else had moved the ladder out from under me and sent me and someone else halfway down the cliff in a spot that was disconnected from the actual path, forcing us to restart the whole thing. fuck. that.

Gunfight Arena - this one was... okay? you just had to collect a bunch of items that dropped when people died, which was at least a good quest compared to some of these other ones, but this one didnt stick out to me. i had to go find someones gameplay of this game to remember what it even was, i literally didnt remember. not bad, just mid.

Mega Hide and Seek - DNF, i was on a serious time crunch by the time i got to this one so i really didnt have time to try and play this game properly, i couldnt find good hiding spots for the life of me so i gave up on public games. tried to do it on a private server with my alts (i have 2 alts lol) and i did what i thought was the requirement ?? it said to win 2 rounds, and i did, but it didnt count it? did i need to only win them as the seeker? i didnt have time for it, as ive said. dont know why it didnt count it.

Muscle Legends - if i remember correctly, this was the first game i did. its just one of many idle/clicker games, which is a genre i have multiple issues with, mainly the laziness of them. easy win, forgetful and stupid game.

My Restaurant! - forgettable. i want to say i had played this game beforehand, so maybe i had a restaurant established? either way i literally dont remember playing this, but its marked as complete and i wont argue with that. you just have to serve 100 customers, whatever.

Bike of Hell - pretty easy imo, though it can probably be a pain if youre not used to these kinds of games. just get to the end of a timed obby on a bike. 

Lumber Tycoon 2 - HELLLAAAAA EASY WIN. literally just enter a cave, find a creepy but cool looking bird human creature (i loved it), and present it with a piece of a log. you dont even need to have played the game before, it accepted logs from even the most basic of trees. my many hours on this game were meaningless to this task LOL

BedWars - DNF, there were very few games i didnt get around to playing during this, and this was one of them.

My Hello Kitty Cafe (Build) - just another restaurant game, but hello kitty themed. yet again the task was 'serve 100 customers!' which was as easy as just setting up some functional blocks and setting up some employees, and then sitting around for maybe 5 minutes while the game did all the work for me. 0 challenge.

War Machines - this one was whatever. you just play as... i think youre iron man? going around an island killing a bunch of NPCs and collecting the items they drop. was annoying when other players killed me, but all around not much of a challenge and was fairly forgetful.

Spray Paint! - you have to find some paint cans around the small map, easy quest. saw a guy drawing a dick despite the fact that i had the 'other players drawings visible' option turned off. wonder if theyre doing alright.

Murderer VS Sheriffs Duels - DNF, i hate games that rely on other players, especially during an event like this because you really cant be like 'hey lets make an agreement so we can both get this badge' because most of these randos really dont give a fuck about you. youre meant to win like 5 duels or something idk anyway i tried to do it with one of my alts, and for some reason it didnt work? i cant imagine the game knew i was on an alt, i literally dont know why it didnt work. 

Shindo Life - DNF, literally dont remember what i was meant to do in this or even what this game is, i think i played it for like 5 minutes to try and see what the quest was and for whatever reason i decided to play a different game instead.

Dungeon Quest! RPG Adventure - repetitive. the first 2 quests were extremely easy as i had already played this game and was higher level than the NPCs i had to fight, so defeating enemies and obtaining loot was easy, but for some reason it wanted me to defeat the boss 10 times, despite the fact that i finished the first 2 quests within 2 playthroughs of the dungeon. this led to me having to do the dungeon 10 times, which took way longer than i think it shouldve because i couldnt just walk to the end and kill the boss, i had to kill every enemy to unlock the door to every section of the dungeon. easy quest, but a bad quest. whats annoying is that when i went to look up someones gameplay of this to remember what the details were, they only had to defeat 2 bosses. bruh.

Metro Life - easy and forgettable. hop in a hot air balloon, collect some floating orb thingies, and exit the hot air balloon and talk to an npc.

Royale High - easy and forgettable. fly around a little map and collect eggs and return them to a nest. you didnt even have to 'search' for the eggs, they were more than abundant and glowed against the dark map. 

RB Battles Minigames - DNF, "win one round or play three consecutive rounds", to quote the quest. i played three consecutive rounds, tried to talk to the npc, and for some reason it didnt count me playing 3 rounds. tried again, didnt work. broke ass quest, in my experience. 

SCP: Roleplay - fairly easy, though a teeny bit of a challenge. you have to go get an item from a house, but the twist is that theres enemies along the way you have to fight, and they werent too hard to fight, but with many of them in fairly small spaces, it was a little annoying how they crowded me. not a bad quest, not the best either. 

Club Roblox - DNF, i dont think i even played this one? i think i kept skipping it when searching for games and just forgot to even try it. 

Slap Battles - this one was easy if you knew what you were doing, but iirc the game didnt explain enough to me what to do so i had to follow a tutorial. this was an issue with a few of these games, but i genuinely dont know if you wouldve been able to figure this one out on your own, or at least i wouldnt have been able to. 

Driving Empire Car Racing - easy one, just do a few races. only complaint is that it only had one race map for me to play, and i wanted more than just one, but it wasnt a bad map and it was actually a fairly decent one. not a bad entry. 

Super League Soccer - the quest was very easy, just complete 2 matches. you dont even have to win, or even to participate really. i think i just afk'd for most of it, i made a goal at one point! but yeah, basically just one where you can sit around if you want, or participate if sitting around for like 15 minutes is too boring for you.

Brookhaven RP - this one has my fucking respect because its an actual fucking egg hunt. it didnt succeed at the goal that most of these had, which was to make the player familiar with the game so that they might want to play it more, but it was good because it was an actual fucking egg hunt during THE EASTER EVENT. literally just walk around a small area of the map and collect like, 20? giant eggs. it actually took me a minute to see some of them, though it was all around still very easy.

Survive the Killer! - this one was one that actually had you play the game for at least one round. you had to find some battery thing on the map during a round, which had you avoid the killer and eventually need to carry the battery to an exit (which was timed i believe) and return the battery to a machine in the lobby. not a bad one, though the only version of murder i ever want to play is gmod or among us. fairly good quest.

Tower Defense Simulator - fairly easy! also i thought it was fun that the little guys used for the defense were reminiscent of the tf2 mercs lol, at least a little bit. i would say this one was pretty well balanced though maybe slightly balanced in the players favor. it was very easy to acquire the money to add more guys and level them up, though i remember i did have to sell a lot of them during the final boss to kill the guy. i remember this one a bit fondly, it was a pretty good quest. 

The Floor Is Lava! - fairly easy, you just had to wait for the hunt map to come up (iirc it only happened every 8 rounds), and when it did come up it was pretty easy. forgettable. 

War Tycoon - DNF, one of the ones where you had to find the crates around the map. wouldve been easy, but like i said, i dont like the ones where you have to deal with other players, and the thing is with these games is that if a player spots you, they are very likely to try and kill you, and i just really didnt want to deal with 12 year olds one shotting me while i searched for stupid boxes.

Treasure Hunt Simulator - yknow, i really shouldnt have liked this one at all because its basically just a clicker, but i was almost enjoying it slightly. maybe it was because it was one of the last ones i did so perhaps i was going a little nuts. you just had to get some chests, and the first two were very easy and only took a few minutes, but the last one took some grinding, which was a bit annoying. though once you realize that you can honestly just grab any chest with enough patience, i earned a lot of money very quickly by just nabbing a lot of stone chests despite their kinda high breaking number. easy, though tedious.

S6 Ultimate Football - just like the soccer one, you literally dont even need to do anything, just sit around. the goal is to play 4 quarters, and the only annoying part is that those quarters take SO. LONG. the dumb thing about football is that the timer is merely a suggestion and what should be 3-4 minutes can sometimes be closer to 10 or more because the game pauses every few seconds everytime the players make any damn movements and then they spent like 30 seconds replaying the clip of what happened and explaining what happened and blah blah blah I DO NOT LIKE SPORTS!!!!!!!!!!!!! IF I WANTED TO WATCH SPORTS AND HEAR ABOUT SPORTS I WOULD GO TO MY DADS ROOM AND ASK HIM. HE WISHES SO BADLY THAT I LIKED SPORTS AND I DONT. anyway this was fucking stupid.

Emergency Hamburg - iirc this was just one where you needed to deliver like 1-2 things from point A to point B across the map. forgettable, but not really bad. more of a time waster than anything.

Twilight Daycare - This Was So Uncomfortable. i literally did not want to be a baby or a parent/babysitter ive already been both in my life thank you very much. it was easy, but literally why did i have to go through this experience. also to clarify im not a parent, but ive had to babysit my nephews a lot of times. i do not like taking care of other people.

Arsenal - while im not a fan of fighting games/shooters, i have to admit this was actually a pretty good quest. also it was a little bit fun, though i could say that about any decent shooter, its not that i hate them, its just not really my genre. you just had to complete a map made for the event, and it was well made.

Warrior Cats: Ultimate Edition - i think i completed this in all of 5 minutes, which was disappointing. i thought id have to go on a hunt all across the map, and i wanted to! but all the eggs i needed were just right next to where i spawned. its not like i even needed to make a character either, ive played this game before so i already had a character pre-made. it would get points for actually being an egg hunt, but it loses them by how much i just didnt even get to do.

Project Smash - this one was whatever and forgettable. its an arena fighting game, and every few minutes an egg spawns and only one person can grab it. i think i grabbed it by the second time it spawned. its easy as long as youre lucky to be near it when it spawns. and again, im not a fighting game type of person, so i was bored playing it.

Ninja Legends - ANOTHER. FUCKING. IDLE/CLICKER. GAME. i hate these games with a passion. you just have to get to a certain point or click enough times or who CARES dude. shit game, shit quest, i fucking hate these games.

Natural Disaster Survival - DNF, look man, i know this game is a classic and has been around for a long time and its been pretty popular fairly consistently that whole time, but ive never been a big fan. for some reason i just can never get good at this game, and yeah yeah whatever its a skill issue, but i really just never could no matter how much i tried. i think the quest was for me to survive a few rounds, and i just couldnt.

PLS DONATE - this one was weirdly decent? you had to do a quest for an npc which led you to a bunker type area where you had to do some actually not-so-bad minigames. a fairly quick play, and it didnt actually make you spend robux like i feared it would. that said, someone did follow me around asking me for robux that i very much did not have (ive been stuck at 8 robux for a few years now LOL i just never bothered paying money for more) and i was like. dude im just here for the hunt. i think it wouldnt be surprising to mention this guy was a bacon hair in the default clothing.

Piggy - DNF, i heard the quest was good but i couldnt figure out what to do, and i couldve just watched a video but i was running out of time and just left it behind.

Pet Simulator 99! - DNF, by far one of the worst ones, and near unanimously the worst according to the general playerbase, and its very easy to see why. this game is a very good summary of the issue with "simulator" games on roblox, which arent even simulators and are literally just IDLE games, and its actually just a joke it was included, and its quest was a joke as well. lazy game that only wanted your money, and it wanted you to sit around for literal hours doing NOTHING while your pets gathered an obnoxiously large amount of money for you, and even then they wouldnt get enough to finish the quest i swear. i played it for maybe an hour or two before i decided i literally did not have the time to do it before the hunt ended, and if by some miracle i had the other 99 and didnt get the 100 before the event ended, it would be because of this game. i literally got up and made dinner at one point, which had me walking away for 30-40 minutes (i checked back in every few minutes to make sure i didnt disconnect) and when i got back it only gave me enough to get maybe halfway through the quest, but i knew that it would take me like 5x that amount of time to get to the end. fuck this game, fuck this quest, fuck roblox for their greedy corporate bullshit that led to everything involved with this one.

The Strongest Battlegrounds - it says that i completed this one and ill take its word for it, but i literally do not remember playing this for the life of me. even watching a video of someone else doing this doesnt bring back any memories for me. clearly its forgettable.

Strongman Simulator - in this one you have to lead an egg through a series of little mazes and obstacles, which is pretty easy. would be forgettable except for 2 things, starting with the bad one, some random guy said he likes to touch kids and then said 'particularly ones named [insert my username here]' in which i had to tell him that im literally 20 years old and not a kid, and he was like 'age is just a number' so i reported him because even though he was likely just an edgy kid, thats not fucking funny to joke about. the second and more positive one is that somehow me and someone i used to know that i was still friends with on roblox, we both were happening to do this event at the same time, and not only that, we ended up in several games at the same time, and this was one of them. this was the one where i finally had the guts to ask if they remembered me and where we knew eachother from, in which they said yeah, and we went through the quest together. i just thought that was neat :] despite some personal issues that arent anyone elses fault, i remember the protozone fondly (the protozone is where we knew eachother from lol)

Creatures of Sonaria Monster Kaiju Animal - this one was okay, you just had to play the game basically. it again falls into my issue with a few of these in which you have to rely on other players not fucking you over, and people almost did for me. one of the quests is to reach adulthood without dying, and someone nearly killed me at some point just because they could. it was fine i guess, but im not one for these kinds of survival games. also to be honest i thought this was a fakemon game and i was excited for it to be before i realize what kind of game it was, and im sad that one of the fakemon games wasnt part of this event, as theyre really good games actually.

Undead Defense Tycoon - this one was fine. you just had to get a certain number of eggs from specific zombies that would come attack your base, and obviously you had to build up your base to protect yourself from the oncoming hordes. not really bad, but not really good. time consuming more than anything.

Need More Friends - this one has you collect crystals around a small map, and then play through an obby while finding a code for a door. it was... fine? not a bad one, but it wasnt really a breathtaking memorable experience. i guess it would land higher on the list because it wasnt really bad or anything. 

Wild Horse Islands - this one just has you do a short timed race. it was quick, easy, and forgettable.

The Mimic - you just have to play the game and walk around the map while collecting enough eggs to buy the badge. i guess theres meant to be a challenge in that youre meant to avoid the giant creature hunting you down, but in my experience it was more focused on other players and only killed me one time, making this a very easy experience and kinda boring.

Total Roblox Drama - a roblox version of total drama island, down to including characters that were very clearly based on the real characters from the franchise, only with changed names to avoid copyright or whatever. i actually had a lot of fun in this and weirdly made some connections and i think some enemies? i ended it in 3rd place! the mission was only to survive long enough to reach the merging of the teams, but i was so attached to the experience by that point that i was trying to win, and i almost did! the biggest obstacle was that there was one person who was so good that i almost think they were cheating, and me and the guy i ended up teaming with found out at the end that they were using an alt account, which is DEFINITELY cheating. their alt came 4th, but their main came 1st lol. btw i played the strat of being as nice as possible to get on peoples good sides, and i think it worked? it got me to 3rd so i guess it did. also that person who cheated literally didnt think that what they were doing was cheating which is nuts.

Military Tycoon - DNF, another one where you had to get the crates and it falls into the same issue as the other similar one, i just didnt want to deal with people killing me all the time if i stepped out of my base. wouldve done it if i had time, but i didnt.

Maple Hospital - this one was.. fine? not a bad one i guess but it was whatever imo. you had to... im trying to think of how to summarize it but its hard. you had to question some patients, go to a bunker, examine the bunker, clean the bunker of toxic waste, go to an alternate dimension and break some alien eggs (??) and then come back and cure a patient of some alien disease they had ??? idk man it was weird. not bad, i guess.

Greenville - this one had you driving all around the map to collect some items. i have to admit that its definitely just meant to be a time waster and wasnt the greatest quest, but it was just a simulation of what i do in most games LOL i usually just explore maps and fuck around like that, but it really was just meant to waste your time. i will say im impressed with how big the map is, but it really was mostly empty space so im not _that_ impressed. i think its meant to be based on a rural area in wisconsin or something. there was a culvers so i assume it was wisconsin.

Deadly Decisions - this is a trivia game, though it also tries to be saw for some reason. i actually had to leave this game and play it again the next day because i was having poor luck succeeding at it, mostly because of the 'questions' that werent even questions and were just minigames that you were kinda fucked for if you werent lucky. i feared i was wasting too much time with it which was why i left and tried again later.

Rocket UGC Car Crushers 2 – Physics Simulation - it should not be this fun to crush video game cars UGH IT WAS ACTUALLY FUN i favorited the game to play it more later. you just have to do a few simple and easy quests, it was not hard. i spent more time on it than i needed to because i literally just wanted to see all the available ways i had to crush the car.

All Star Tower Defenses - DNF, i just didnt get around to playing it.

Collect All Pets! - DNF, i just didnt get around to playing this one, mostly because i assumed it would be another idle/clicker game, and idk maybe it was i literally dont know.

Cheese TD - i think this was the one where there was a map made for this event and i actually lost it once or twice, but i eventually completed it of course. it was okay, also it was mouse/rat themed so that was cute i guess. 

Restaurant Tycoon 2 - in this one you just have to serve customers enough that they drop 100 eggs that you have to pick up. i had apparently played this game in the past so i already had a functioning restaurant, all i had to do was wait around and make sure to pick up eggs when they dropped. whatever.

Car Dealership Tycoon - this one has points for being one where you run around and search for items, you dont even need to play the game as intended  lol. what i dont get is why it was bunnies instead of eggs, but at least thats still easter themed. it was a decent time.

Combat Warriors - DNF, i do not remember playing this, i think i just didnt get around to it.

Weapon Fighting Simulator - another. fucking. clicker. game. easy ass quest, boring ass shit ass game. i fucking hate clickers.

Tsunami Game - weird one. youre in a giant box and youre heading toward the other side of it while trying not to get pushed back to the start by varying levels of tsunamis, some of which can be easy avoided or jumped over, and others are harder to avoid. you have to go to a certain crevice in the walls and walk through a tunnel hiding in the side of it, which leads you out of the box to reveal youre in the desert, and you need to find an alien whos just chilling by a mountain. i took longer than i needed to because i like exploring and there was some stuff to look at in the desert, but it was easy once i knew what i was doing.

Funky Friday - just friday night funkin. you just have to play songs, and you dont even need to play them well lol. you can actually just play the songs solo and set it to 'whoever has the highest score wins', and the other half of battle never earns points, so you can just earn a single point and still win. whatever.

Death Ball - DNF, this is my personal least favorite. the actual game itself is fine, but the hunt quest specifically is fucked. you have to defeat a boss, and for most of the battle its fine, but by the time the boss has very little health, even when i was full health, i would die within 20 seconds. it hits you with every attack at once and way too much at once, i literally played this several times trying to defeat it and i just couldnt. i dont know how i was meant to do this, and i didnt have the time to figure out a strat. how the fuck was a noob meant to win this fight, ive been playing for over a decade and i couldnt.

Dress To Impress - this game is so fucking funny to me because they have these semi-realistic bodies but the heads are just the giant square ass robloxian heads and it does NOT look good dude it looks so fucking funny. i still think its really funny how people try so hard to have these detailed and really pretty makeup covered fashionable faces in roblox but then theyre plastered on heads that are so square they might as well be a minecraft block. sometimes comedy is so simple. that said i did like the clothing in this game and its honestly not a bad game! the quest was also not that bad, though it was kinda whatever, you just had to walk around the clothing room catching bunnies that were running around, specifically you had to catch 20 before the next round began. more repetitive than anything, but lucky it doesnt last long.

Drive World Drifting & Racing - repetitive but short, you just need to drive between some points back and forth for a few minutes to collect parts to make a car on a stage. eh.

Dragon Adventures Fantasy Pets - this one just has you walking around, fighting some enemies, and bringing an egg back to the start. kinda whatever quest, but i will say that the dragon models are really neat.

Spongebob Simulator - DNF, tedious bullshit idle/clicker game.

Swordburst 3 Boss - DNF, just didnt get around to it.

A Wolf Or Other - tried playing this one, realized i didnt have time to do the quest at the point when i tried playing it, and just didnt get back around to finishing it before the event ended.

Emergency Response: Liberty County - this one has you going around, finding and following some clues or something. there was like 8 clues in total but you only had to find the first 3 to complete the badge. i think my only issue is that it felt like you had to know the map to do this one, because it asked you to go to specific places that would take you a long time to find if you didnt know where to go, or would probably just not even be something people would know to look for.

Legends Of Speed - another 'simulator' where you just have to walk around for 30 seconds and boom you get the badge. very easy and quick. ugh.

Sonic Speed Simulator - this one has you running around a pretty big map to collect a specific part up to a certain amount. also yes, its all themed around sonic and you run around as if youre sonic and stuff. pretty fun for a quick play, though if the entire game is like the hunt map, i imagine it gets old. this is a good time to say that i remember the videos i was watching while playing most of these and i remember i was watching a video about avatar the last airbender and character designs, it was a good watch. also during the scp one i was watching a video about indian representation in 2000s cartoons and it was pretty informative. i had more fun watching these videos than playing almost all of these games LMAO

World // Zero Dungeons & RPG Adventure - i had already played this game a little bit ages ago so i had no issue defeating enemies, of which youre meant to kill a bunch to get the eggs they drop until you get a certain amount. easy, forgettable, more of a time waster than anything, but thats what this whole game felt like which is why i stopped playing it in the first place.

Escape Running Head - this one is basically like a nextbot game but youre running through little mazes or whatever. i was skeptical of it and maybe i shouldnt have liked it but it was a little bit fun for what it was. all you had to do was play the first 3 levels.

Elemental Powers Tycoon - this is an extremely generic tycoon game that is literally just a copy of almost every other modern tycoon. i chose the devil element, which is NOT an element, and it was themed after that chainsaw anime guy i guess? anyway your task was to find an egg that spawns wherever, defeat a boss that spawns every few minutes, and complete the tycoon. easy, boring, forgettable, whatever. and again its like, dude i dont want to have to fight other people who take delight in killing me whenever they get the chance.

Life Together RP - ill give this one points for being an egg hunt, but it was very easy and quick. all the eggs are around spawn in a very small park, and theyre hard to miss with how bright and fairly big they are. the only one you can manage to miss is the one hidden inside of a slide, because its the only one not out in the open.

Berry Avenue RP - this one has you buy the ingredients for an acai bowl, buy an apartment/house, make the acai bowl, and eat the bowl. easy, forgettable, felt like i was simulating what boomers think millenials do. also i thought it was broken because the first apartment i bought wouldnt let me walk through the door, turns out i just had to buy a different apartment. weird.

Toilet Tower Defense - bruh... why. i do not understand the skibidi toilet thing and this was clearly based off of it. also the first time i tried playing it i ended up in a lobby with a guy speaking spanish who chose the hard mode when i was trying to do easy, and i awkwardly tried to communicate with him through google translate... and then i realized i didnt even need to play that map of the game so i left and did what i was actually meant to do, which was collect eggs from various parts of the game. it would gain points for being an egg hunt and also making the player play the game a little bit, but like... it loses them for being about toilets.

Lumberjack Simulator - UGHHHHHHHHHHH FUCKING CLICKER GAMES FUCK OFFFFF

Break In 2 (Story) - iirc this was the one where for some reason the group of people end up in the base of some criminal organization and you have to fight some enemies every few minutes. it was whatever. you just had to survive until the end i think. also there was some guy in the attic that i thought was freddy fazbear for a minute but instead it was a cop, so you can imagine my disappointment.

Football Fusion 2 - DNF, another game that makes you have to deal with other people, but both quests it gives you rely solely on other players. you have to tackle someone, and you have to catch a ball from a teammate. despite playing for like 30 minutes, i did not manage either. this game sucks and i do not like sports.

Astro Renaissance - i think this one just has you go around a map collecting some items and then fighting a really easy boss. seriously they did not think that boss fight through, i literally just stood outside of the arena and shot it when it was vulnerable because the arena didnt have walls lol. easy but pretty

3008 [2.73] - i love this game btw. i have good memories in this game, which actually include the person i mentioned earlier from the protozone! we made a little cult where we worshipped the lamps because the light scares away the employees at night, and we even had a dramatic story of heroism and betrayal. anyway the hunt event quest in this game is to find a computer, activate the ability to have quests, wait until nighttime to do those quests, and theyre fairly simple if you can find the objects needed, and then just survive until the next day to get the badge. i played this one last because i knew i would like it most, and while it was fairly bare bones and quick, i am openly biased and enjoyed it. i just like playing this game.

Anime Dimensions Simulator - fairly easy, i think you just needed to complete two timed maps to get the badge. i actually failed it the first time cause i was taking too long to just kill the enemies, but i quickly got a hang of the game and finished it pretty easy. not a bad quest or game, though i imagine it gets old fast.

Catalog Avatar Creator - DNF, i think this one was one where you fight people...? i joined this one thinking it was a different game, saw the quest and realized i didnt have time for it, and never got back around to it. i dont remember what the quest was.

Doors - DNF, this is apparently a really popular and good game, but i just never understood it. i avoided it, and obviously just never got around to doing it. no hate to the creators, i just really never understood the appeal of this one.

Adopt Me! - this one has you go through some maps and do some minigames, it wasnt bad and i surprisingly liked some of the maps actually. i especially liked the creepy one with the giant dragon things, it was so cool looking <3

Big Paintball 2! - DNF, didnt get around to this one

Blade Ball - fairly easy, just have to play a few rounds to complete the quest.

Obby But You’re On a Bike - controversial opinion i guess, but i like this one. the quest isnt noob friendly and ive heard everyone else hated this one, but since ive played this game before and already had half the worlds unlocked, it was a quick and easy one for me, and fun because i already liked and played it lol. my only struggle was barely a struggle, as i dont like being timed and the first quest was to do the first world in under 13 minutes, and i only had 20 seconds to spare on my run when using the basic bike. This game definitely wants your money, but ive gotten good at ignoring that part of the game.

Arm Wrestle Simulator - another clicker, who cares.

Mega Mansion Tycoon - you just have to complete the tycoon up to a certain point, as eggs spawn after you get to certain points in the tycoon, and you need 4 to unlock a book that gives you the badge. forgettable and a time waster.

Barry’s Prison Run Obby! - you either dont need to complete the obby to get this badge, or my game was broke as fuck, because you need to get 10 donuts to get the badge iirc, and all of them were just... sitting in one place. easy, also this one was kinda gross. I can appreciate the acab spirit though

Pull a Sword - another. fucking. clicker. game.

The Survival Game - DNF, this was actually one of the first ones i played, but i didnt have the time to finish it. you had to progress enough to be able to fight an npc that was guarding a chest that held the badge, and i almost got there, but i didnt quite progress enough. i honestly just ran out of time on this one. 

Redcliff City RP - another forgettable one where you just drive around a map collecting items and driving really far inbetween. whatever. 

Carry a Friend! - i will admit that i was very lucky here. me and some random guy latched onto eachother and did it together, and we failed a few times for various reasons, but luckily this dude was chill and didnt abandon me lol. i only wish you didnt need to restart the whole thing everytime you fail, but once you understand what to do for each part of it, its pretty easy to just speed through it back to where you ended off. i can imagine how much it wouldve been the biggest pain in the ass if i didnt get so lucky, but if it came down to it i mightve just used an alt tbh.

Bayside High School - lol you just need to play what is basically guitar hero but on the keyboard, but unlike the friday night funkin clone, you actually have to try for this one. i dont play games like this, so i failed the first time, but i got it the second time. you have to get a C or higher to get the badge. honestly a pretty good one, i only remember being frustrated because, again, not the kind of game i really play, so i was not good at it.

Livetopia - this one has you walk around and smash a crate and melt some ice and get a vault or something idk whatever, its mostly a time waster with a hint of a minigame in it as you have to do a matching game two or three times, but it really is mostly just wasting your time on purpose.

Snowboard Obby - this one is a source of controversy, as the original quest was that you simply had to only play the game for 15 minutes, which meant people could literally just go idle and not even disconnect and be done, _but_ by the time i got to it, the quest was changed so that you had to do the first 100 levels (i think there was only 100?) but honestly they were pretty easy. i died a few times, but it was never enough to make me want to rage quit or anything. not a bad one after the change, but i can see why people were upset with it at first.

Fruit Battlegrounds - last but not least, another fucking fighting game that relies on other people. this one sucks, especially if you have no alts or friends to help you. you have to reach level 15, which is easy and just a time waster, as you can just spam a move and not have to actually attack people with it, but the second one is the one thats stupid. the second one is that you have to kill two people without dying. if youre unlucky enough to run into people who literally just want to ruin your day, and i promise you i did, then its a fucking piss fest. luckily i have 2 alts, so i found a spot near one of the spawns where i could hide and kill my alts. fuck this game honestly

and with that, the end of my commentary of each game. i know im not the target audience, as this game is meant to be targeted to kids and im an adult by now, but i feel like it should be worth something that ive been playing this game since i was 7 years old, 13 years ago. this game has changed a lot in that time, and ive played a few of the easter events by now, and this one was just... yikes. most of the games were low effort money hungry garbage. i wont go on a rant about it, but i really do have a lot of issues with modern roblox, and this event really does feel like a decent summary of those issues.

i dont even know if i could rank them... most of them really were just mid garbage. How am i supposed to rank games that all blend together and feel like they really didnt care? excluding the ones i just straight up didnt play, i can really only say this:

last place goes to death ball, second to last place goes to pet simulator 99. first place goes to... i dont know. none of them particularly stick out to me as being really worthy of a first place spot.

i wouldnt say this experience was a huge waste of my time and i regret doing it, and that it all around sucked, but it really wasnt as good as it very much couldve been. with some better game choices and some less lazy quests, this couldve been an actually really cool event, and a way to show off some games that are clearly full of love and passion, but instead it just... wasnt. roblox pushed all of the effort onto the playerbase, chose games that were clearly only there to make money, and this easter event didnt feel like an easter event. the one word i feel i can use to describe it is 'disappointment'.

i still love roblox, and i wont stop playing it, but i keep hoping maybe itll be better, and it just isnt. it took the turn that many companies and other things make where it decided that its main goal was to make money, but it forgot about the people that even made it possible to have that goal. its not like they ever didnt try to make money, even when i first started playing they had builders club, but there was still so much passion and love and it felt less corporate and greedy. there wasnt 200 idle/clicker games on the front page that were full of pop ups begging you to spend robux. tix actually allowed you to buy items without spending real money on them, and maybe they shouldve just changed how that mechanic worked instead of getting rid of it, but i heavily doubt theyd ever consider bringing it back in any form, only keeping the currency that you have to pay real money for, leaving you shit outta luck if you dont.

whatever man. its like growing up with a cool friend and then watching them become a soulless business man and still sticking by their side, but most of the time its not fun to hang out with them because theyre a corporate shell. but sometimes, just sometimes, they still shine through.

[c0smicfern]

as an exercise in futility (bc i'm incapable of fully convincing myself either way), i wanna lay out the arguments for both sides:

reasons why it might be asd: the meltdowns (if that's what they actually are), emotional dysregulation (admittedly normally taken in the negative direction), executive dysfunction, some stimming behavior present now & when i was younger, moderately sensitive to yelling & too many people talking at once, undersensitive / higher threshold for pain & smell, listening to music as often as i possibly can especially if i'm out in public, randomly smelling things & my gf, becoming stressed if experiencing too many sensory stimuli (e.g. playing on my switch, trying to listen to music, and trying to have a conversation with my gf -- i'm not entirely sure that this isn't just normal), fear of public spaces (admittedly this may be a mostly trans thing), high correlation between being trans & having autism, difficulty tracking more than one verbal convo at a time, rsd (again if that's what it actually is), seen as mean when i was younger which i put a lot of conscious effort into not being now, frequently misinterpreting the words & actions of others, being very sensitive to other's emotions but having a hard time putting myself in their shoes, difficulty advocating for needs or expressing how i really feel (my mom used to describe the act of getting me to open up to pulling teeth), generally flat affect (not completely monotone although i may lean this way when i'm stressed), finding it difficult to initiate conversations so i typically only do if i need something, failing at back & forth conversation if it's not about my interests, social smiling & small talk make me uncomfortable, understanding other people & making friends has always been incredibly difficult for me, taking things too literally at times, difficulties with motor control in childhood & in adulthood (had to go to OT when i was younger), somewhat persistent speech impediment during childhood (stopped speech therapy in middle school, had most difficulty with the R sound), lost friends & relationships due to things i've said or done without thinking or intentionality

reasons why it might not be asd: could be the combined result of my gad & bpd & transness, the sensory difficulties i think i'm seeing have other people at their center (again possibly pointing to my gad instead), responded to my name when i was younger, engaged in and still very much enjoy imaginative play, having good emotional intelligence at times, generally none of my symptoms (excepting things that fall under A1-A3) are as bad as what i've heard or seen from others, while i benefit from routine it feels almost impossible to set up for myself, hard to remember specific special interests for some ages (as a rule, if i like a game, i will generally only want to play it until i'm thoroughly bored with it - minecraft & roblox especially were major special interests when i was younger), weak evidence for sensory sensitivity (hard to make arguments for highly specific or wide reaching sensitivities aside from the meltdowns -- i honestly think what i experience in this area could just be anxiety), difficult to argue that my 'repetitive behaviors' cause significant impairment (i consider most of these to be quirks for the most part)

EDIT: thought it might be nice to put my results for the various different screening tests here, so here lol

Psych Central: 23/40

Aspie Quiz: 154/200

AQ: 36.5/50 (average, i've taken this one many times)

RAADS: 150/227