#2 Versions because i have problems...we dont talk about it

[guestiguess]

Extra (crappy sketch)

[azure-cherie]

PAC :

What's in your store for January

Pile 1 -3

Hello love's hope you had a very happy and fruitful new year , I'm praying for the happiness and well being of all of us one more year together I'm so grateful for each one of youuu

Please choose using your intuition and take what resonates

If you'd like a personalized reading for new year

Paid readings , paid readings 2 , masterlist

Pile 1 :

First of all what are you guys even dealing with good lord The energy is pretty heavy , I will not be surprised if you have prominent Saturn in your charts this month I believe you are dealing with karmic cycles , Things ending in general, you might be a bit shaken up soon something you thought never would happen will happen

I'm sensing career or home sector fights could be there as well as inner conflicts beware and take precautions don't get too caught up about what others have to say rather choose your own story this also indicates you might soon take a stand for yourself its really required something has to come to an end because the time is over now you are to urge for more ! Financially! Abundance is written for you this time your creativity will pay off I know you like you play with fire but remember life moulds you like a clay some fire glazes some melts you gotta choose your own battles why do I feel like I'm talking to myself lol .

You will understand the worth of spontaneous plans soon sometimes you gotta do stuff for the sake of doing it and you just gotta act wild just be careful about the fact that everyone you go out with isn't a friend every co worker doesn't mean good for you learn to see through people's mask ! Theres one video by persephonesmind its perfect she explains it really well , followed by ten of swords some of you might experience a rock bottom moment however it isn't for everyone but with the world be assured you will pick yourself up this might seem like a bad ending but it's a good one or turn out to be good it's a matter of time bae anyone who tries to play you cheat on you will be ashamed themselves because they will see the purity in your heart .towards the end of the month I see some enemies becoming friends.

Pile 2 :

You're a bad bitch period !! This month is about embodying the best version of yourself move on despite the snakes around you ignore the people you're gonna be investing on something that is worth it it's a sign ! Friendships are something you will be blessed this month new and old you will also actively let go of a fear of yours I heart heights and abandonment issues.

If you're looking for commitment from someone it will be given this month like engagements marriage yay social media fame is also written there would be more family functions to attend to I see more active energy in this pile. You will understand the worth of standing alone and work your intuition through difficult situations .Your dreams might be a clear indicator of something also I feel you're making someone cry or someone is making you cry ask advice from someone who's been there in your situation you can also ignore if the situation isn't as important I also feel ignorance energy I guess it's good because you're also healing from abandonment issues .

You'll be doing some course on money management or get advise from your elders on your resources. Sometimes we make our own problems dont get sucked into that take time but let your loved ones know that you need it ! Also you really need that money management advice as you might end up losing something but I also don't think it will he a bad loss ! Sometimes sacrifices are necessary you might understand the worth of small losses now but that will protect from bigger issues later.

Pile 3 :

I don't dress for women I don't dress for men lately I've been dressing for revenge! That's your main mood this January you're gonna show everyone who didn't believe in you what you're capable of you're going new heights reaching new goals making new ways I'm so proud of you

You have struggled a lot to do this actions manifesting you are getting closer to what you want , might fetch yourself a new leadership position this month you're gonna be an example an epitome of grown beside the struggles because you're so ready to work despite all the sneaking going on behind your back you're gonna be doing the thing needed to defeat your enemies you will undergo momentary defeat and might cry for a while because you might feel all forces are against you this is the time to pour into your inter child

When trauma shows up remember to shadow work nothing ever goes away one needs to heal with it don't get swayed away with temptations and fake promises I heard devil is strong but so is the knight know that your emotional strength will lead you through this you have to be more intune with your emotions but also lead with logic it's a hard balance to learn but once you're on it you become undefeated and you will be I'm so sure about that.

Thank you so much for reading

Have a great day/night ahead ❤️

[katiascraft]

"Is this the start of something new?" |LN4

Part 2: Made in Argetina: The Series. (Lando's Version)

Parings: Lando Norris x Argentine!Reader.

Summary: after the austin gp, lando and you have your "first date".

Word count: +2k.

Warnings: none. Just fluff. Not a native english speaker so there could be (so many) errors. (I do what i can). Not proofread.

Author's note: finally here it is! Hope you like it i accept more suggestions and contructive critics! Dont forget to like or reblog! And follow me so we can be friends :3 (and drink mate together!)

MASTERLIST

Watching the podium was a dream of yours and now you have made it come true. You heard the anthems for the first time in person. All of the tifosis screaming it out. Charles smiled so proud along with Carlos and Max. You were really intrigued by Max’s character and you hope someday you could meet him. That was another dream of yours. Like Franco said: a tiny human filled with so many crazy dreams. Yeah, he joked about it all the time because you have this dreamy personality but he loves you for that. His so logical and terrenal, he loves that you add the daydreaming he most of the time lacks. That’s why your besties, you understand anc complement each other.

When the podium party ended and people started to spread out into different directions, you decided to call Franco to see where he was at. But he didn’t respond. You felt now again embarrassed like when you bumped into Lando fucking the most handsome cute and hot persona you’ve ever seen Norris and born his phone. You felt so stupid. You forgot your friend is now a driver here and probably doesn’t have time to answer your checking calls. So you decided to get back to the paddock and headed to Williams garage. You didn’t wanna be lost so you concentrated on finding your franquito. Fortunately some guys from the team told you he was at a meeting so you decided to look for Lily.

You found her at a table with another girl and didn’t want to interrupt but you also didn’t want to be alone.

“Hey… hi. Sorry to interrupt girls. I was lost for a moment I’m happy to find you Lily” you said shyly and clearly sorry for making the two beautiful women stop talking.

“Y/n! Oh no, there’s no problem honey. I was telling Alexa about you. So perfect timing!” She said sweet and made you smile widely. She introduced you to Alex, Charles Leclerc’s girlfriend. She was so stunning in person. And also really sweet. Lily made you part of their conversation and your stayed with them until Franco was free to get back to the hotel.

Lando was on a meeting with the team he really didn’t want to be in. He wasn’t in the mood to listen to all of that right now. Oscar knew about it and tried to pay attention so at least one of them had the important information and the big men knew. Lando couldn’t stop thinking about you smile and your rosé cheeks. And what you said to him. He also was anxious about the fact you’d never replied. Nor add him to contacts. He wanted to see your profile picture. He wanted to talk to you right now but he had to be here doing driver things. He never tends to be distracted. But he couldn’t help it. You were too gorgeous to not overthink about the whole interaction you had.

When the meeting ended Lando and Oscar went to the mc claren building to get change and eat something before heading to the hotel and rest. They didn’t want to do much. It was a frustrating race and weren't in the mood to go celebrate like some of the boys will do. Maybe he’ll watch Cars and fall asleep before it finishes. It was his comfort plan to be honest.

You and the girls order something to eat at the Williams building. You couldn’t stop thinking about the fact you broke Lando’s phone and that you could have stayed with him. You didn’t know why you felt like that. Like you did something wrong and added to the phone breaking. You started playing around with your phone once Lily and Alex started talking about things you really didn’t understand. But the only thing you learnt is that Alex lives in Monaco and there people speak French and you didn’t know about that. That’s when you see his messages. You blushed by reading them. You got so nervous. Lando was flirting with you that was obvious but you couldn’t believe he was flirting with you like why? Out of all the girls that come to see races, why you? You bit your lip replying.

‘Oh hola pretty boy. Sorry I didn’t see it till now. And sorry again for breaking your phone. Funny both phones still work somehow jaja’

You didn’t know how to approach and English man. Of course you flirted with guys before but you know, with the same culture and slang and social context. This is so different. You didn’t want to come off as rude or whatever.

‘How brave you are to give your heart to unknown person 👀’

You didn’t know if that was actually considered a tease but you were trying at least.

You jumped scared when Franco out of nowhere hugged you from behind almost screaming in your head.

“Al fin te encuentro amiguita. En qué andas? Cambiándome por gente linda y famosa?” (He said hi and what you were doing “charging me for more pretty and richer people?”) that made you laugh and roll your eyes.

“Ojalá. Lamentablemente me tocó ser tu amiga y no puedo salir” you joked about how unfortunately you were his friend and you couldn’t run away. That made him room his eyes. He joined the conversation and met Alex as well. You talked for a few more minutes till Alex Albon came back and so we started going down the stairs all together. Alex headed to the Ferrari building and another girl said bye to Lily and Alex. She said it was Carlos’ girlfriend Rebecca. All of them were so beautiful. You were in love.

You and Franco were chatting about what the meeting was all about when you heard someone scream from afar.

“Wait guys! Franco! Alex! Y/n!” When you all turned you found lando coming to you. Franco looked at you with one brow raised, strange about how Lando knew his best friend’s name. “Sorry guys, I just wanted to say goodbye. We’re not gonna see each other until Mexico” he said weirdly and nervously . That wasn’t the usual Franco thought. He looked at Alex who looked at him the same. Lily looked at you with question marks on her eyes. You smiled at Lando. Your heart is racing. He gave everyone a hug. And you were last. You didn’t know what to do in this situation. You didn’t understand what he was doing. When he hugged you a paper fell on the floor. So when you two splitted he picked up the little paper.

“Here you go” he said and handed it to you so you took it suspicious. “Alright bye guys! Take care!” He waved, running again into the orphanage building. You saved the paper on your jeans and played it cool.

“Okay that was weird and nice at the same time” Franco said, making all of you giggle.

(…)

After leaving Franco at his room and spending some time with him just chatting and drinking mate, you decided to come to your room to rest as well. All of the feelings you felt have left you exhausted. You were so happy for franco. So proud. You could feel your heart explode.

You had a shower. You needed to take out all of the weight of the day from your body. Relax for a while. By yourself listening to a piano playlist you found on Spotify. Dark academia theme. You loved it. After a few minutes you were packing and preparing all of your stuff because tomorrow you headed to Mexico. You were gonna be with franco until the Brazil race. And then going back home to Argentina.

When you grabbed your jeans, the ones you wore today, you remembered the paper piece lando handed to you. You know it wasn’t yours but your intuition just followed along with his play. You unfolded it and smiled.

‘Wanna chill out and watch cars for a while?’

That’s what the paper said and under the question was his hotel and room number. He didn’t answer your messages. And you thought this was like the most romantic thing. Like not using phones and sneaking into hotels. And keeping it a secret. Like a wattpad story you used to read when you were a kid about Niall Horan. Or maybe are you just crazy? Whatever.

You hesitated whether to go or not by the time it was. But you had nothing to lose. He offered and maybe this one gonna be it. Maybe you wouldn’t meet Lando Norris like this or any other way ever again so.

You decided to take some candies you had in your bag and that was it. You felt really bad about not having anything else to take. Google maps indicated his hotel was the one next to the one you were so that was a coincidence that wasn’t in your bung card. You didn’t think much about it and just went straight to his room.

When you got to it you knocked on the door carefully. If he was asleep you didn’t want to wake him up.

Fortunately a few seconds later we opened the door with a sleepy smile and very surprised.

“I thought you wouldn’t come” he said letting you in. You giggled a little.

“Surprise! I’m not losing my chances here honey” you said teasing him and saw how he blushed closing the door.

“Is that a thing in Argentina like beating hot and a teaser?” He asked me to open his mini bar, take out two water bottles and hand one to you with a smile.

“Well I think it is, you know. We are all pretty charming” you said, taking the water and string in his bed. You saw the tv screen displaying the cars movie already in the middle of the story. You acted offended.

“So you invited me to watch cars but decided to watch it all alone?” You said arching a brow funny. He looked exposed and stood in front of the tv.

“Actually that was a trap because no one says no to cars cause it’s a great movie but I invited you to look at me” he said posing awkwardly making you giggle.

“Alright I’ll enjoy the view then” you said grinning.

You just enjoyed time together by chatting about Argentina and London and a few words. And trivial stuff but you laughed so much. He is so funny and laughed at all of your jokes. Like you matched each other’s energy. Or crazy.

It was time for you to go back to your hotel because it was already 2 am and packing wasn’t done. Neither you nor Lando had packed everything for tomorrow's flight.

“Would I see you around then? It was really nice talking to you” he said on the door looking down at you with sleepy puppies eyes. You were so cute and fun. He felt the butterflies. You made him so nervous. Giggling and blushing like a teenager. You smiled at him. You were the most precious thing he has ever seen.

You nodded “of course. I’ll be with Franco until the Brazil race. That’s when I go back to Argentina sadly. But maybe I’ll travel again for Abu Dhabi” you said softly, looking at him. God he was so beautiful. He nodded in response.

Silence took place between you two for a few seconds. You decided to end it by giving him a kiss on his cheek. “See you around landito, te me cuidas chico lindo” you said just like how you taught him earlier a little funny and waved at him heading to the elevator. He waved at you. His face red.

Was this the start of something new?

(…)

‘You looked beautiful in that orange hoodie you wore today’ he texted.

‘You only say that it’s because it’s papaya. Do you want me to be a papaya? You’ll have to work your ass off. I’m team Williams until franco gets a seat in another team’ you texted.

‘I’m on it darling. Get ready’ he texted.

‘Oh I’ve been ready my whole life for this moment’ you texted.

‘😍😍😍😍’ he texted.

‘👀👀👀👀’ you texted.

——————————————————————————————

Hope you liked it 💌 my inbox is open if you have any idea! Send your requests!

[welovetesvkaidan]

OPINIONS ON KAIDAN EE/IF???

My honest reaction:

in all seriousness, if you wanna hear me yap about it, more under the cut

warning like, genuinely a ginormous yap, like a HUMUNGOUS, sleep-deprived yap,,, im cursed to be obsessed with skyrim + modded followers instead of touching grass

I think a lot of this is probably gonna be the same thing other people have said, so im sorry

if you feel i'm gonna be bringing up redundant points and get mad at me😓dont read

I haven't experienced and thus won't talk about the versions of EE and IF that are now separate mods from each other. I don't know anything about that.

if they're better now yayyy but this is about pre-separation

I should preface this with the fact that I've played through Skyrim 3 times with different stages of Kaidan EE/IF:

The initial Dawnguard + fixes/miscs mod

Kaidan EE/IF versions before extensive faction/NPC dialogue for Kaidan

EE/IF w/ NPC Dialogue (AKA Fratpack)

I was also part of the two different discords that were purged and created during these intervals. i don't even know if there is a discord currently?

anyway, that is to say that I have experienced the mod and it's behind-the-scenes progress, extensively so I have a pretty good idea of what I liked and didn't like

That being said, I will introduce probably my biggest problems with it: Tonal whiplash

Okay, well the most common complaint is ofc that a lot of the writing is out of character - and I agree. But it's not just ooc on paper, it's his voice too. I swear, it is very jarring hearing hushed, mild og Kaidan 2 voicelines, and then being deafened by EE Kaidan SCREAMING in my ear ALL.THE.TIME. (like... why are you yelling at me rn jeez)

Seriously. I'm not sure why they didn't just re-record everything from the original mod instead of adding more and more contradicting lines on top of the originals. It definitely could have been a standalone mod, and sometimes it almost feels like it is - because he is just so different.

My most infamous moment in my last playthrough with him happened after we defeated the dragon at Kynesgrove. His og Kaidan 2 dialogue played first, in it he shows interest and is cordial about Delphine ("I wouldn't mind prodding her mind" or whatver dialogue), THEN immediately after his Kaidan EE/IF dialogue will play, in which he walks up to Delphine and STARTS YELLING AT HER AND INSULTING HER - like they argue for quite a bit wtf. And it's like, listen, I have my thoughts about Delphine, but whether or not it was okay to yell at her isn't the problem. It would be fine - IF he hadn't just calmly told me he thought she was okay.

It is sooo confusing how he contradicts himself :(

I mean, yeah, fragments of who he is are still there, I can tell it's Kaidan, but he's warped to fit a different character. Like a con-artist Kaidan.

Anyway, besides the contradictions, it also feels out of character because of his established backstory.

Let's go over it: He's an orphan, lost his only connection to his family(his guardian) to drugs, fell into substances himself, joined a violent cult, had to escape said cult, came clean from his addictions, has been traveling Tamriel bounty-hunting, got brutally attacked by the Thalmor, rescued by mere chance. Do you honestly mean to tell me this man would be yelling, pissing, drinking, lewding, and joking his ass off?? After all that???? NO - or maybe not these levels of extreme. (maybe some other dude might, but Kaidan's characterization insists he is a brooding, keeps-to-himself man, even though he never acts like it anymore)

That man should be tired, and he did feel like he was tired in the original. He was more brooding then than he is now, usually silent, but could still have an edge of comedy/wittiness, he was smart, he had been through a lot!

In that regard, EE/IF Kaidan felt like... we are experiencing Kaidan 10 years in the past - like a Kaidan in his early 20s when he was still a drunkard low-key terrible person. He is just so energetic, always yapping - GOD he talks a lot now. ugh but most of the time it wasn't about anything, it was either inside-jokes, meta jokes, and only occasionally did we get things that added to the experience.

For example, I think most of us who have played Kaidan 2 remember at least one specific line he has said while exploring. What comes to mind for me is either "Can you smell the magicka in the air too? Smells like a rainless thunderstorm." or "Watch for the mammoth with the carvings on their tusks, that's how the giants mark their herd." Alright, both pretty nice small talk for characterization (he IS smart) and worldbuilding.

Tbh i can't really remember any iconic lines from the additions of EE/IF Kaidan... the only two lines that stood out for me were: the "elevenses" line from the clip above (started bumping into him every time he was about to say this so he would stfu... total tonal dissonance), and one he said while I looted Lucky Lorenz ("poor sod wasn't as lucky as his namesake would have you believe!") kai HOW do you know this man, and his nickname, who told you that??? (idc about it that much but its like the only other added line i remember)

I thought that maybe his ooc-iness might have been caused due to the collaborative approach of the mod, I think the mod authors created their own perfect Kaidan - and that's good for them! It takes a shit ton of work (Ik cuz i was there!!) But I think the original essence was lost with each addition. It might have been lack of direction for the voice acting too, a lot of the lines might have hit better if they weren't borderline screamed.

Okay, at some point while playing I got so tired of his constant himbo chit-chatter that I tried tuning him out and bringing other npcs from vanilla skyrim as followers. Problem: even without kaidan on your party, everything starts being about kaidan. Because the extension made it so that Kaidan either has history with/character interactions and development with different NPCs from the base game.

The main poor sods that traveled with me:

Erik the Slayer: Apparently was Kaidan's childhood friend, got inspired by Kaidan to become an adventurer. Least egregious in my opinion, they say sweet things to each other. I swear, Kaidan yells more at me than he ever did at Erik.

The Companions: dumb, dumber, and dumbest basically.. This part of EE/IF was also known as "The Fratpack" and y e a h they pretty much had Vilkas, Kaidan, and Farkas acting like immature frat boys all the time. Just,, absulutely taking away all the maturity out of these GROWN ASS MEN. im sorry, i guess i dont get the appeal. I liked it when they didn't behave like teens (Aela im so sorry, you deserved better than being part of this)

Lydia: All she does is simp for him, ALL.THE.TIME. You think she's about to have a meaningful thing to say? nope, she's checking out Kaidan's ass. Think she'll have a deep convo with another npc about one another? nope! she wants them to tell her all about Kaidan. Both the Companions and Erik will either talk down to her or have to deal with her thirst for Kaidan. i had to start leaving her home.

They also suffered from the same tonal whiplash as Kaidan, unfortunately

additionally, the mod added an "early flirt switch" - you could basically toggle Kaidan to start showing romantic affection for the Dragonborn before the amulet of mara., the interactions were good on paper, but everytime he stammered and stumbled over his words it was written in such an unnatural way... pls people don't talk like fanfics lol !!!

I did like that he gave me flowers, my inventory got full of them - but then he noticed how many flowers I had in my inventory and judged me for "picking everything i see" ugh dude you gave them to me, but also even if you hadnt... mind your business lol

Another addition was a feature that basically made it so NPCs could potentially throw flirtatious comments at Kaidan and the Dragonborn (Bishop flashbacks😨)

You can't do anything to defend Kaidan from those comments, but he WILL take it upon himself to defend your honor infront of any men, women, jarls, or criminals that even so much as find you attractive (THIS INCLUDES FARKAS AND VILKAS BTW :( ) by being rude, forthcoming, AND violent. so yea, you can guess the target audience

speaking of which, he definitely comes on too strong on you once you start the romance, and it left a bad taste in my mouth. I specifically picked the "go slow" option for the romance, and the next day or two it was him constantly complaining about having to go slow under his breath, how he wanted to do anything but slow rn... and like just, wow. :/ yikeees lmao

Maybe this is the result of "i can fix him" romance ideals? im sorry but I liked him when he was down to earth

Bonus? He comes with a campsite now, which has to be magic because its ginormous and he somehow lugs it around despite it also coming with a whole ass furnace (fine fine i'll hold my disbelief)

anyway I do like it, its basically a player house you can take anywhere (so long as kai is with you ig) also you can have a cat in there

I like that there is an MCM, I like that the MCM lets you get through the quest stages in case you get stuck

I like that he can guide you places, usually he gets stuck in a tree or rock but its the thought that counts

I think if the mod had continued in the vein as its original iteration when it was just audio/bug fixes and included these qol features it would have been better than it is now.

But it seems maybe i'm just not the target audience, and as a young woman I'm really confused as who the target audience is 😓

okay im srry rant over

if anyone else wants me to yap about other kaidan skyrim things also ask or join in cuz i like yapping about skyrim and kaidan to people!!!

[colbystoes]

Rumors pt2

Part 1. Part 2(colby ver.)

hi, this is rumors part 2 but sams version. if you liked part 1 go ahead n click the link above where i have listed both parts.

Summary: You and colby got into a fight after rumors about your relationship spread online and sam intervenes, something unpredictable happens.

bold text: colby

normal text: sam

italics: y/n

r/n is a random girl. just think of a name.

—

3rd pov.

Next morning was even worse. You had no clue where Colby even was, he just like…disappeared. You spent the morning with sam, since he was there for you all night, taking you food, comforting you, basically being the only one that was there. You loved him for that, he was so sweet even when you had massive fights with colby but colby woul get jealous because of that reason. It always caused fights between you too and sam would just distance himself from you since he didnt want to ruin his friendship.

Mostly spending time with sam, you realized that deep down you really cared and appreciated him. You can’t say you see him as a friend but more than that. It’s always been like this, at one point there was a love triangle between the three of you and you choose colby because your love was strong for him. Maybe not. Sam cared so much for you, he would die for you, do anything for you. He had such a soft spot for you, unlike colby, he ignored girls because of how in love he was with you.

Later that day, you went shopping with sam just lift up your mood, chitchatting, and laughing with sam until two particular faces came into view and ruined your mood. Colby and R/n. Disgust filled your face and soon as R/n tries coming up to you. Sams face filled with worry turns to you making sure you dont act out.

“im fine sam..” you whisper to him, you turn towards her and say hi, fake smiling. “HI Y/N” she screeched excitedly.

“this bitch”

“hey guys, sorry we can’t chitchat we have to go byeee!” sam says while he drags me out of there. You look back at Colby, while he stares at you with no expression.

“you really need to talk it out with him” “i know”

—

You’re laying down in your shared bed with colby, when he walks in and slams the door. You jolt up when the loud slam happened. “what the fuck?” you shout. It was late, there shouldn’t be any ruckus happening. You can tell he had been drinking by the way he was standing, he always got aggressive when he was tipsy.

“what? what kind of fucking problem do you have?” colby shouts. Guessing sam was near, you try to calm him down. “geez colby chill out, no need to scream when you’re the problem.”

“the fuck do you mean?, im the problem? how?, youre the one acting bitchy and ignoring me.”

“I KNOW YOU DONT CARE YOU NEVER CARED…you care more about her than me..” your voice got quiet as the tears slip down, blurring your vision. Colby raised his to slap you, but before he could sam came in charging at him tackling him to the ground.

“don’t you dare put a hand on her.” Sam growled, pinning colbys arms down. You rushed out, grabbing your phone and a blanket and ran into sams room. You sobbed and sobbed, not even noticing sam walk in until you felt his arms around you.

—

1st pov.

—

“its okay y/n its okay…” Sam hushes while he put a hand through your hair. It soothes me, i always feel safe with sam. I cant say the same for colby.

“im sorry sam, i didnt mean for this to happen..” i whisper into his chest, he tighted his grip around me.

“it doesnt matter. just know that im here and i will always love you.” sam says getting quieter towards the end. I lift my head with a puzzled look. Of course i knew, i knew he loved me. Ever since we were kids.

“i love you more.” I say, grinning with a growing blush across my cheeks. Our faces got closer and closer eventually our noses were touching.

“you don’t know how long I’ve been waiting to do this.” sam whispered with a grin. Our lips connected softly, it didnt feel forced it felt passionate. I felt his hand trickle its way up to my jawline, the kiss got slower and slower until we pulled away. We stared at each other while we caught our breath. I’ve never felt this way before with no one. He made me feel different. I loved him.

I guess colby and i aren’t together.

—

hiii, okay so this sams version since @blogcybr requested it!! thank you i honestly like this one better🥰.

[weirdmageddon]

since hes open to feedback im considering talking to james roach about giving jade the justice she deserves after her narrative shafting in act 6 and one-dimensional ooc-ness (and also being a plot device deprived of agency) in the epilogues. if i do im probably going to link to this post……

so james if i sent this to you and you’re reading this, hi! :)

you say, “i want you to know if youre having problems with the story you can come to me with it and i will hear you out”. first of all you are such a good dude and have such a good open honest approach to the fans. i need to get that out there, because i know you’re just as much a fan of these characters and world are we are. secondly, i don’t know what your plans for homestuck beyond canon are, but dave and jade’s poor handling is a problem in both homestuck canon (act 6, even act 5 fucking them over with “tell, don’t show”; see the latter half of section 1 of the post at > Dave: Deploy cloning apparatus. and section 2) and post-canon that has yet to be addressed.

i understand the nuances of making things flow in a story; things that have already been established can’t be simply retconned. i wrote this post knowing that in mind and hopefully working around that into believably timed and justified/needed arcs gives it more potential

jade is a character i care about so much, and many fans also. her dynamic with dave was one of my favorites but the resolution to their separation…is not even really a resolution. it’s hard to talk about one without the other since theyve always been narratively intertwined. or at least jade has

remember how they musically collaborated more than the other kids? (crystalanthemums is their surprisingly tender song dont forget. i saw that the weird troll grub versions of objects make a comeback in the upd8; make music a relevant part of homestuck in-universe again too </3) dave sending her sbahj furry poster in the mail? the first ones to use a collaborative fraymotif in the comic? kringlefucker and conksuck boot? literally collaborating on creating the right seed for the new universe? and then dave died in jade’s arms and they were separated for 3 years and then that never gets touched on because of the retcon and all the other endgame shit going on (and lets be real grimbark jade from before the retcon wasn’t a satisfying reunion either). we get like, a brief exchange of dialogue at the very very end that made you want to see MORE of them after the battle but it. doesnt happen.

and then in the epilogues jade gets warped into this oddly hypersexual ooc one-dimensional character meant to narratively get in the way of davekat and it’s so awkward and uncomfortable for them. and even THEN in meat timeline gets her agency revoked by the narrative with alt calliope. and in candy dave realizes he’s gay (i thought he was explicitly bi? didnt he call jane hot multiple times both pre-and post-retcon, and once call roxy a “choice babe” in pajamas before he knew it was his ectomom?? if you’re actually gay and in denial why would you have these subconscious freudian blunders). and being married to jade gnaws at him because of it which is. unsatisfying i guess and isn’t consistent with dave’s established sexuality…and then he dies leaving his probably concerned wife and becomes a robot. even if the “point” is that the epilogues are metanarrative commentary about storytelling and candy represents the kind of fanfic that goes off the rails with fanservice it doesn’t feel good when i still care about these characters and their established canons. and a lot of people are in the same camp as me regarding this. it’s still an uncomfortable resolution for their relationship

i really want to see jade’s arc overcoming being used as a puppet by the narrative and the space aspect. just some things to think about / consider that have been running through my head: she’s a witch, right? isn’t what she’s supposed to do is actively bend the rules of her aspect? feferi bended the rules of life by asking the horrorterrors to create dream bubbles so the deceased could still sort of “live” which had a massive narrative impact. who exactly determines that being spacebound means you are fated to be passive and alone? the author? alt calliope? how do we know alt calliope can be trusted or if she’s just projecting her experiences as the most passive class possible onto jade, who ironically has an active manipulation class but is forced to be passive for some reason? normal calliope wasn’t right about everything classpect-related either.

ultimately these things are up to you. you’re still the director of course. but i’m speaking to you, as equally caring of these characters as you and everyone on the team, as a hypothetical suggestion or just something to consider for a jade arc: i think it would do such good to jade and the comic as a whole to see her speak to the manager and recognize the power she has and take back the reigns over her own life and dignity. jade is MAD that she had her own possibilities for socialization and agency taken away from her. and with floralmarsupial, my beloved mutual floral who i went to homestuck high together with, i KNOW the potential they possess to write a compelling arc for jade harley. i think everyone knows too lol floral is THE compelling deep jade harley fanwork big name fan. i dont know what we got to lose. with you guys in charge now, and with the last we see of jade in hs^2 (now hs:bc) fighting callie’s influence and advocating for her own agency, really the only way to go from here for jade is up. (assuming she doesn’t permadie of peanut but i doubt that’s going to happen since she’s one of the original kids and it wouldn’t be satisfying storytelling. and it’s homestuck)

this statement so ripe with potential to me ^ and we’re left on a cliffhanger with jade going in this direction

i want jade and dave to be close friends who care about each other a lot and do silly stuff together again. this isn’t even a call to make davejade canon; it doesnt have to be romantic—i dont want a davekat davejade war to break out, you know? i know you’re trying to balance fan demands. but i just loved their dynamic a lot and i MISS it so much, homestuck act 6 didnt give us this and i wish their reunion had more that went into it. we’re past that point though

i want jade and dave to have a talk that’s like old times. something that isn’t awkward as hell or about sexual relations or drama or whos fucking who. just something for the two of them. something that grounds them in what made homestuck so compelling in the first place: character and friendships and these kind of interactions

i want to see them collaborate again. an idea i have is maybe they start a band or something since they’re both musically talented and also live together so they can make stuff together in person now. you’re a music guy you get it. tangle buddies. jam buddies

and maybe something more serious that concerns just the two of them. post-retcon dave never talked to jade about his thoughts when they fought bec noir right? knowing that jade would inevitably kill him with bullets through bec, but he couldnt warn her because he knows she wouldn’t go through with it, creating a doomed timeline? so jade thought all that time she killed him by accident…..what about all that guilt she must harbor? the first person she had in-person contact with since she was probably four years old, her best friend online, and accidentally killed him within just a few hours of meeting him? and never got to talk about it with him, let alone anyone, after three years? hello?? :(

these are the final lines of the last pesterlog between jade and dave before their 3-year separation (and basically all of act 6)

so uh…..this exchange really openly invites some kind of talk to take place even if it’s long overdue. among other things maybe. they need to hug or something. jade’s touch starvation is real, but not everything needs to be sexualized about touch. she’s lonely and starved of affection but i feel like it would be more meaningful if it wasn’t sexualized. just really basic platonic primal cloth mother needs. just like..both being human beings and having basic needs like this that jade’s been deprived of. who’s the person she would feel most comfortable going to? who does she have the richest history with throughout the webcomic? dave, right? her online best friend since childhood that always cared a lot about her? they have stuff to talk about

i feel like that would address the issue people had with jade’s out of left-field promiscuity in the epilogues and even leftovers of it in hs^2. not only do i think primal platonic touch starvation would be a more meaningful and evocative type of interaction to give them at some point, it wouldn’t rock the boat or create any ship drama (davekat has long since sailed and most people seem to be on board with it) and it would probably be really positive representation of these sorts of things which not only throws a bone to aroace people but just depicting this sort of thing normalizes the fact that two people can be close and not necessarily in an official relationship.

this is a good transition point to this post also which is basically an extension to this one. it’s exactly the issues i had. it’s on the nature of what they had going and how much they mean to each other but how the storytelling held them back when it was unnecessary

this breaks my heart. mr. roach and hs:bc writing team please i miss my favorite blorbo duo being happy in each other’s company. they were such good friends but circumstances pulled them apart. i miss when they created music together and talked about their interests and exchanged quips. i am such a well of ideas for stuff like this. show us how much they mean to each other again

if youre still reading this james thanks for hearing me out. if you wanna pass on to the writing team to look at and get their feedback on this i’d be so so thankful

“and to think that after all this he still chose to save her, like always, probably knowing he had little to no chance, just because he cares for her, her life and who she is beyond this moment, really meant a lot for them. i really, really was mad that this would be the last time they would truly ever be together in a way that to me mattered” — vintagegamebro

[scarisd3ad]

Begin again

Pairing(s) - billy Hargrove x fem!reader (past), Steve harrington x fem!reader

Summary- after the end of your 2 year long relationship with billy you finally go on a date again and realize how horrible billy really was to you.

Warnings - mentions of a toxic relationship

Masterlist

I sighed as I looked at myself in the mirror, this was my first date I was going on since I broke up with Billy and somehow, I can't shake all the old habits I used to have. he hated when I wore heals absolutely hated them because he said they made me taller than I actually was. I slip them off not knowing if Steve had the same preference. I decide on a pair of Mary janes that still had a heal but wasn't that tall it was barely an inch. this was just a first date down at the coffee shop around the corner, but I still felt this overwhelming pressure to look good.

I put my favorite cassette into my Walkman. Billy hated this song, and he always made it known when I listened to it. "God why do you like this shit" he'd mutter every time. I decided on walking to the coffee shop since it was a nice day, and the coffee shop was just down the road.

when I arrive, I assume Steve would be late because Billy always was. I just assumed all men didn't care about punctuality. but when I open the door Steve's sitting at a table in the far back corner. the bell from the top of the door pulls his thoughts from the menu he was looking at. he looks up and waves me over. when I walk to the table, he gets up pulling the chair across from his out for me. I smile, Billy never did this for me. "Thank you" he shakes his head as I take a seat "it's not problem."

'you dont understand how nice that is, but i do'

he throws his head back laughing when I tell a joke that I didn't think he'd find funny because Billy never did. he always said I wasn't funny, but Steve thought I was. "it's not that funny" I giggled as I push a piece of my hair back behind my ear. he continues to laugh, and I can't help but admire how handsome he looks. I've spent the last I don't know how long believing that love was a horrible thing that I never wanted to do again but right here in this coffee shop everything changed. it was like everything I ever experienced with Billy was erased and I was able to begin again.

James Taylor was my favorite singer and somehow was Steves too. "I've never met a girl who has as many James Taylor records as me" he laughs after I told him about my collection. Billy would've found that as me trying to say I was better than him in some type of way, but Steve doesn't. I laugh "ma-maybe you could come over one day and I Dunno check'em out" I say with a shrug he nods "yeah, yeah that would be fun."

he tells stories about his friends and his family and thinks it's weird I'm coming off a little shy. I was used to listening and not talking with Billy. "Are-are you alright?" he asks his brows furrowed together; I shake my head "ye-yeah I'm fine i-i I'm sorry" I mumble "it's alright you don't gotta be shy around me" he whispers.

as he walks me down the block to my house, I almost bring Billy up trying to forgive Steve for my nervousness, but he brings up the movies that he and his friends watch every Christmas and I want to talk about that. "Yeah, and we watch the grinch every year on the 24th and all the kids come and robin and Eddie too and shit its cool" he laughs. for the first time what's past is past and I don't want to bring Billy up anymore. I don't want to pretend I don't like my favorite artist or pretend I don't love wearing high heels for a man who wouldn't even kiss me. "y'know I really like you and I'd really like to do this again" Steve says as we stop in front of my house "I really like you too" I whisper as I look down at the ground flustered. he places his hand on my chin pushing it up so I'm making eye contact with you. "Can I kiss you?" he asks I nod before leaning in and pressing my lips to him.

'On a Wednesday in a cafe I watched it begin again'

[dreamtydraw]

Hello from the Fishbowl!

Oh I’m so glad you and plant anon agree with me on my vn red flags/icks! Like I said a lot of the red flags and icks I tend to have are really subjective so I get that some people will love what I kinda hate but it’s nice to see I’m not alone on stuff :)

Also, is it bad that I kinda wanna hear more about Heir to Love and Lie? I’ve never played any Fictif games but this sounds like some hot gossip I want in on, tell me more about how bad of a game it is lol. From an outsider perspective I think it’s kinda funny how it’s like “Yes the Fictif app has a bunch of great and fun stories with a ton of good content- NO DONT LOOK AT THAT STORY ITS HIDEOUS-” I know the stories are probably made by different teams so it makes sense that there’s differences in quality but still

Last Legacy and now Roadkill have peaked my interest since I’ve seen you talk about it here (I had never heard of Fictif at all before) but I’ve been a little hesitant to give the games a try because they’re mobile games and frankly I’m not the biggest fan of playing vn style games on mobile, I used to all the time but the grinding for stuff like story keys just to get content that may or may not be good kinda grated on me so I stopped and haven’t looked back. But idk maybe I’ll decide to give Fictif a chance when I have the time, your love for the games are definitely convincing me to give it a shot :)

Also I hope you get better soon and you’re not sick with anything too serious! Take care of yourself!

-🐟

( ok i’ll do proganda about the good game of fictif ask me about htlal on another ask )

Ok so i’ll start by saying that you should def play roadkil, last legacy and monster manor on the fictif app, WITH A CRACKED VERSION! If you have an Android play with a mod app and you won’t have to pay for the special choice ( you still have to wait for keys tho but it’s manageable) I personally use Modyolo. With the mod there is no grind, you just wait for your keys to regenerate to play the chapters.

Why you should play last legacy ? Last legacy is a really well written fantasy romance made by queers, for queers with good queers characters. The narrative is limited but realize that fans of this game haven’t had update in 2 years and we all still love this, that how good the game is for us. What I really appreciate is the approach of the romance, the well-written worldbuilding, and the interesting plot and evolution of the li throughout the story + bonus points the art is really pretty + the music is awesome

This is an otome where you feel the passion of the dev because of all the details and care they put into the characters. It sad that we’ll never get an ending but just because it’s my second favorite otome after Our life i really recomand.

Now another wonderful story on the app is Monster manor. It’s a reviseted tale of beauty and the beast where mc is a reparator that come helps the resident of the manor to fix the place and also fix their issue. Again it’s very well written and although you can get subtile subtext on romance this one is very axed on exploring the character's mental health and their story of self-improvement. ALSO IT HAS A CANON TRANS DRAGON CREATURE WHO’S THE SWEETEST I LOVE HIM HE’S SO WHOLESOME-

Bonus the music is so good i even added it on my spotify- and good art

Monster Manor is one of those stories that leave a very specific feeling in you. I don't know how to describe it but it just has a lot of wholesomeness and character going troughs sad but relatable problems that you see get better and makes you happy that they're healing.

now.... my guilty pleasure.... Roadkil !

THE BROMANCE OF THIS GAME IS SO GOOD I swear

Objectively: This game feels like a wild mess of fan fiction with random scenario after scenario and cliché horror moments, but oh man the ambiance. The best trio of Li, they are close friends, and in the 3 routes the group is just such an amazing friend group. The characters are lovely and it's like reading a bad yet good wattpad fanfic : well written ? no ? But the ideas ? good !

Like i said, this game is based on cliché of horror movies but also on american culture ( which I learned trought this game lol ). It has longer chapters than the other two games (except Tess but Tess got hit by the sexism of a greedy company that wants shirtless men in dating sim to attract gurls ) BUT they all shine.

Poe's route had me ugly crying in the end, Howie's ending is AWFULL but I had a great time, Tess is actually a superbe F Li even whith the dev having to cut her short and ruin her ending, she shine very britgh in the other routes and her own ( for ex she's the one with a shotgun and the one that won you and howie a teddy bear )

I really need more people to play roadkill because it's an underated banger in my opinion and it has many great scenes in the mess of scenarios ( the intro is really good for ecxemple )

Like, when I say not all game needs to be well written? That's what I'm talking about, this one is a hot delightful mess

ANYWAY! My rambling was long but I hope it was interessing !

[watery-melon-baller]

hey lilac!! How you been? (I've heard about the class and oof. You can vent to me all about it if you'd like)

you've heard about the class huh are you stalking me 🤨/j

lmao besides this and one other class I'm actually having a decent time! bit of context: I'm switching degrees from product design to engineering which is a wild shift but it turns out,,,, i am secretly a math nerd,,, but since im an art student they won't completely switch me so I'm taking a mix of design and engineering classes. ive liked my engineering classes a lot! my two favs are my statics class (physics of objects that don't move, it's a LOT of trig) and GD&T toleranciing class, which is basically the way that engineering blueprints are standardized. very cool!

my least favorite is the class i was bitching about earlier, it's my studio class and its a semester long project that is a culmination of everything i dislike about design: vague bullshiy nonsense that has to have ✨meaning✨ and also fix a problem that doesn't really need fixing. i am not at all good at design, or coming up with New and Innovative products. give me numbers any day. best i can do is like. A slightly cuter/more efficient version of something that already exists. i do not know how to please the average masses. but yeah so far this project has been a #trainwreck bc i can't think of ANYTHING and my one idea he doesn't like because it's very simple and it just doesn't have enough "depth". which like again. im not Fucking Good At That Shit. but im gonna meet with him tomorrow during office hours to talk and probably jusy explain "my man i am not good at designing and I hate it and I am fully aware that I'm bad at this which is why im switching majors at the end of the semester. this project is the best i can come up with this isn't a lack of me trying this is literally all i can do so if you have any fucking ideas please go ahead but otherwise yeah don't expect much. i hate this class so much and there isn't really anything u can do about that bc it's just the entire concept of the class is something i loathe." i don't really wanna be like. throwing myself a pity part or be a whiny brat but like. every time we have to do Anything for this class (or my other design one) my brain switches into moody teenager mode and is like "UGHHH THIS IS SOOOO LAME I DONT WANNA DO THIS!!!!" i am trying to keep the bitchyness in my skull and not act immature in front of my profs but ah. yeah. hm. Very tempting to drop it but i do not think that would be a great option 4 multiple reasons i shan't get into.

but yeah other then 2 design classes i don't like i am enjoying the rest of my classes! ive also been hanging out with my friends more which is good bc last year accidentally isolating myself was a HUGEEEEEE issue lmao so. glad we are avoiding that (4 now)

[bibibbon]

Maybe you have noticed but in regards Izu...the narrative punish him(fuck you Hori) as well the majority of the fandom. Some Shinso fans think Izu should have come clean to Shinso about his quirk regarding the Izu vs Shinso 2.0 (coincidentally Aizawa stopped trained him after Shinso lost) and how in "Izu and Shinso are friends" Izu should pity Shinso as well we, the readers, while Izu's past is not seen as a big deal.

Some do say " yeah bk was meanie" and that if we are lucky.

I dont get why Shinso thought Izu(the kid who calls himself deku, not dekiru) whose quirk break his bones (of course UA does nothing. Has any teacher help anyone with their quirk?) And is mostly like from poor background is a golden child....

Meanwhile Shinso is really silent about BK.

What I'm trying to say here is...how Hori and the fandom ignore the ramifications of Izu's abuse or use to prop others characters.

"Shinso is a good guy bc he punched BK for Izu" cool...but why cant Izu do that? Why we dont get a word of what Izu thinks about that? Why he cant have closure?

(We see this in ships too. Ochako the super cool GF defeats BK...and Izu's pain is not important, not the healing! He has a gf duh🙄😒)

Yeah this is actually one of the biggest problems I have with the bakugo and izuku relationship/ rivalry or whatever it is (it's definitely not romantic or a friendship) izuku never gets to reflect or be the one to stand up for himself and some people say," oh it's IZUKUS character he doesn't realise that what bakugo has done is bad and he just forgives everyone who ever does him dirty" or something along those lines which really annoys me because ITS COMPLETELY FALSE. We can see in the first chapter after the suicide incident that izuku can actually feel negative emotions towards KATSUKI and that he actually knows and realises that what KATSUKI is doing is WRONG. However, because of hori's love for katsuki he can be never make him seem like the bad guy which 1) ruined katsukis development 2) ruined izukus and other characters development.

Concerning the shinso situation I don't think Izuku has to own up TO NOTHING!! No offence but hori made shinso kind of dumb when he chose that out of ALL hero class students you CHOOSE to target izuku who YOU CAN CLEARLY SEE DOESN'T SEEM TO FIT IN OR GO BY YOUR STUPID SILVER SPOON IDEOLOGY. Iam all for shinso and izuku being friends and I have talked about ways how to change the narrative so izuku and shinso's interactions can make sense in the narrative but yeah idk what's going on with hori.

Lastly, when it comes to izuku and his backstory the fandom mainly ignores it because it's not consistently brought up as something that affected izuku even though we can clearly see it did. Hori also stated that he wished he didn't make bakugo as mean and you can clearly see him try and undermine bakugos actions by making him think about izuku and only izuku also the fandom will eat anything that's BKDK which they think is a better version of saskue and Naruto but in reality this is a toxic wish version.

[cttrajan1206]

hi!! im here to ask about your ocs!!

first of all i would like to say PLEASE read the shadows house manga if you werent planning on it already...! youll get so much more that wasnt offered in the anime since it cuts off at season 2 , its just so good.. SO GOOD ok. ok

about astral and anjem!

i know you said you dont have all the details worked out so its ok if you dont have an answer to any of this atm!

could you talk a bit more about their dynamic/relationship, if you have anything else you wanna say?

what are their goals in the house? are they pursuing roles within relief team, starbearers, etc? are they wanting to get invited?

how good is astral at controlling his soot power? do you think its likely any of his experimenting on anjem could go wrong + how would he react, would he be able to fix it?

love ur ocs :}

WAAA HELLO?? i never original post ever so i was really surprised and excited when you reblogged it saying you'd read it later - AND NOW IN MY INBOX TOO? WAAAA.... >O<

But waa ok ok so! Funny enough, @tsukiomoon was over at my house and convinced me to read Shadow House (having watched the anime) while we were at a bookstore. I'd already glanced at it a few times over the years so I was. Very easy to convince tbh djdhfjf So I actually began with reading the first two volumes!! Then after that, I was thoroughly hooked so we proceeded to binge the entirety of it together in two days. That said, I'd love to read the manga. I'm debating on it because the official translation -> scanlation currency exchange is not in my favour ToT but I think I like it enough to bear through it, the anime missed a few scenes from even just the first two volumes after all.

Onto the ocs!!

Dynamic/relationship: This is a fun one. I've mentioned they both very much love each other already, I think at first they're both very superficial about it and build up versions of each other in their head (Astral even moreso having known longer). It gets deeper as time goes on but Astral isn't obssessed with Anjem just as a person, but also for his quality of being human. Anjem is similar likewise but there's a mighty power imbalance there.

Astral is actually also a special shade! He remembers before morphing. He's probably the worst one to do so though because he doesn't really care about the Shadow House - not when it gives him license to not only have Anjem to himself, but also such close access to humans. To him, the memories just give him a clearer understanding if the Faces' limits. He gets very annoyed with seeing others treat their living dolls badly and will pick fights about it or ask Anjem to give them recompensary gifts to them.

Anjem I'm less clear on... He's bad at cleaning but Astral doesn't mind particularly (and also doesnt produce enough soot for it to be a problem). The rigid structure of his life gives him comfort in its reliability but he does often long for some of the luxuries Shades get. Like nice clothes and better food. He doesn't like coffee though haha. I don't think either of them ever realise the brainwashing thing bc Anjem's too picky and never fully swallows the coffee anyway, sometimes vomiting it out. He still gets the effects partially though

Goals: I think Astral does want to escape the House eventually - he doesn't care too much for getting everyone else out, he just wants to find more and more humans and learn everything he can about them. Anjem I haven't decided too much yet. He knows Astral's goal and wants to be there with him to see it too, to travel the world, but I think he'd be scared of taking that step.

I think he wants to see his siblings again, one last time

Roles: Oop... Astral's power is very good for healing wounds so technically the relief team would be good for him but I personally wouldn't put him in a room with so many humans in it XD He keeps his power very downlow but regardless, I think he'd have made his way into the relief team. He's their bigger advocate on training to treat dolls better.

Anjem wanted to be in the research team instead but, as a Face, he has to tag along and look pretty

Power: At first Astral was pretty bad at controlling his power. He doesn't have blood himself after all, it was very unknown territory. In fact, the only way he Did grow better at it was When his experiments on Anjem failed. They could be very dangerous failures too, in case his soot clogged a vein or he clotted uo the wrong part or forced it to produce too much blood. In his panic to fix it, he tended to reflexively reverse whatever he'd done and so far, though there have been catastrophes, Anjem hasn't died. There was a time when Astral stopped his heart but that's whatever, he's immensely better at controlling them now. He doesn't frequent the training room (especially since his powers require blood), but instead has perfected his powers through practice in his room. He does also keep a few vials of blood he requests from the relief team that uses to practice with at times.

He prefers it best when it's with Anjem though :)

There was once, when the brainwashing had worn off more, where Astral fucked up. In attempting to heal a wound on Anjem's wrist, he accidentally sped up the production of the blood and it poured everywhere, spilling out faster than healthy. Anjem, wide eyed and afraid that this time, he was going to die, scrambled away from him screaming. He tried to run away but the pain was blinding him so much he could barely concentrate. Nothing Astral said could convinve him to calm down, and the last thing he saw before passing out was Astral roughly grabbing at his arm.

Astral was able to stop the blood, working with this as an experiment to control his area of effect, and sealed the wound. He bandaged it up and treated it with care, pressing a careful kiss of regret on the bandage and on Anjem's hand, the black mark staining his skin.

Anjem woke later in his box. He was afraid and angry and upset. He didn't talk to Astral for a full week, only interacting with him as a Face. Astral was heartbroken by this and apologised many times. They made up finally, after Astral stopped him from cleaning and held his hands, about to apologise again, when suddenly Anjem lifted the shade's hands and pressed a kiss to each.

"I'm tired of this. I miss speaking with you. I forgive you, so stop apologising every time I enter a room."

That mended things but going forward, Astral started getting external vials until he was better at his control.

Tidbits!

Astral likes his name but also wants to be separate from it. In private, he asks Anjem to call him "Aster" as a similar compromise. Anjem means "star" in arabic - he named his Face to match the name he preferred :)

Anjem is mostly good at reading Astral's emotions but they have a system of handsignals and body language to indicate the faces they want to make.

I've been thinking on them and their age awhile. I hadn't noticed when I made them that adults get finer clothes than the chikdren but I refuse ti change my design, I'm attached </3 I think they're similar to Barbara and Maryrose - old but still in the children's wing by virtue of not being given an invitation

This is partly due to Anjem's scar but mostly due to Astral's refusal to be useful outside of the bare minimum (this is not a noble thing, he's lowkey just lazy)

Oh my god I wrote a lot sdjbhf

Yeah!! That's them! That's my boys. I'm thinking of making a couple more too - I want to explore the idea of someone using their Face to hide disguise their real emotions

Thank you so much for asking 😭 it means the world to me and got me to think about them more

As an extra, have a doodle of Anjem's second sight of Astral:

[dextixer]

What Vtuber Ruby and Miles cameos say, matter (kinda).

So, a day or so ago we have had people discuss about Rubys Vtubing appearances and the things she has said on video. People have had mixed opinions on what was said, some people think its not a problem, others think its a problem, some others dont care. So, i wanted to chime in on this entire discussion and why in my opinion this, and the cameos that Miles makes matter and are not "irrelevant".

Disclaimer

Before i start, i will note. I dont really think that these things are HUGE problems and "OH NO, THIS RUINS THE SHOW" or any other nonsense. Some people have seen these things way too negatively. But i also think that people who say that it doesnt matter at all are taking 2 way too extreme positions.

Lore Swiss Cheese

One of the main problems of RWBY has, for a long time, been the very vague concepts of what is canon and the in-show lore. From the very start of the show, it had commentary tracks, the creators talking about the show etc. Despite not being in the show itself, we have had many tidbits of information (such as Rubys favourite food) and the like given to us in outside of canon content. And it has not just been some minor things either. Ironwoods semblance basically does not exist in the show, and yet it seems to exist in lore, and it was shared with us from outside the show.

And later on, after V3, RWBY has received a lot of different media that expands on its lore and are considered canonical, despite sometimes never appearing on the show, or even creating very weird situations where something is conspicuous by absence in the show itself. For example, we have a very often discussed topics of V7-8 of the defense of Mantle/Atlas. One of the discussion points have always been how weirdly weak the defenses of the kingdom are. While one could chalk that up to people having an "inflated" view of Atlas military, but we have been canonically told and shown a lot of Atlas tech that is conspicuous by absence in the show.

Automated turrets, different versions of Atlesian Knights etc, which were said to be canonical in Amity:Arena. Or for example stealth tech. Yea, Atlas has stealth tech, like, genuine stealth. Its in one of the books. And yet nowhere in the show.

We have two canonical games, Grimm Eclipse and Arrowfell, with characters and concepts in them that have never been seen in the show. Has anyone ever seen team BRIR in the show? Heard of them? Maybe the tech from Arrowfell would kinda be useful, even if outdated against the Grimm invasion? What about the outlying Atlesian villages? Are they just dead at this point? Where the heck is Thornmane? He gets captured and hes nowhere in jail even as a cameo? And why does noone talk about Grimm Eclipse? Tech enchanced Grimm seem like a bit of a topic that kinda should be discussed sometime, no!?

We also have the comic books with various questionable canonical decisions including Raven turning into a bird to fuck with child Ruby. Blakes involvement with Adam which is somewhat weird because the comic books try to humanize Adam while the show demonizes him.

And let us not forget the whole "Canon Adjacent" nonsense where RT cant even come out and say that its obviously non-canon stories like Ice Queendom and even crossovers with DC are not canon. They cant even come out and say that!

Oh, and of course, i just remembered, the Grimm DnD campaign which is also apparently canon!

The reason i am listing all of these summarized versions of the multiple lore issues that the show has is that the lore of RWBY, is swiss cheese. It has lore that is given partially in so many different places, including in out of universe that its almost impposible to follow it properly, and if you do try, you are only going to get more confused because the main show feels like completely separate from it all, despite being in the same lore.

Vtubing and Cameos matter

And this brings me to of course the very simple claim, that due to the fact that the lore is already swiss cheese, these statements made in Vtubing and Cameos actually matter. Because even if they are not stated to be directly canonical, the lore is already so incredibly fucked and unclear (To the point that some people cant even decide if DC RWBY comics are even canon or not!) that adding these examples to the mix? Its just bad practice. Because at the end of the day, Vtubing Ruby, IS Ruby. She is played as in-universe Ruby, by the same Voice Actress, hosted by the SAME company.

And it matters especially because these things DO affect the FNDM. People who say that these things should be easily ignored are missing one key aspect. A lot of the FNDM are affected by these. BB being a key example. No, im not going to argue that the FNDM forced RT to make it canon. What i WILL argue is that the toxicity of BB community and its rabidness was intentionally cultivated AND enabled by RT. Does it matter that the BB song is not canon? No, it did not. Its not canon in the show and yet it made pro-BB and anti-BB crowds hysterical. Same for the song that was made for Blacksun. These songs directly contributed to the shipping wars. The various moments of people like Barbara also indulging the shippers just further fueled that entire movement.

Hell, the same can be said for Qrow x Winter shippers. While it was never a big thing one of the main "fuels" it had for a long time was because Vic and the VA for Winter interacted in a single panel. Or lets remember the whole "Vibrator function" which is OBVIOUSLY not canon, yet has become a part of often referenced and established fanon.

RWBY does not have a stable FNDM, i know, im a part of it. It does not matter if something is or is not canonical when not only are the lines of canon/noncanon blurred to barely existing, but the FNDM can often take things very far to fuel their expectations, wishes, and behaviour.

Especially when it can fuel what i will refer to as simply exploitative behaviour.

Cameos. Cameos, in my opinion are a fine way for VA's to make money. Such as many other things like, for example, music producers reviewing songs, voice coaches evaluating singing etc. Such content has cropped up maybe 4-5 years ago now and imo, is a fine thing.

But like any thing, imo, there are good and bad ways to do this kind of content. When for 40 bucks, one can ask one of the main WRITERS of the show questions about the shows world and opinions about things like ships. That is, imo, a bit far. Not only does that give an incentive for people to pay money for extra snippets of lore, but also, a way for people to validate their beliefs of ships and other such things. Because that is what his Cameo is all about. Its not VA work, its his words, in relation to his work as a writer for the show. And considering the earliest cameos and Ironwood discussions, that in my opnion is NOT a good thing.

The BB Onlyfans thing is ALSO an example of that, that i think was bad. Once again, disclaimer. I think that OF is fine, you want to do it? Go ahead, i paid for Markipliers photos, i aint ashamed, hes hot. I think it becomes at least slightly concerning however, when the VA's of a controversial ship decide to do an underwear photoshoot together with the same theme as their character in-show relationship.

Because...

Parasociality

A parasocial relationship is feeling a connection with a persona/thing that does not know of your existance or only humours you. Celebrities, sports teams etc.

RT has, for a long time cultivated a STRONG parasocial relationship with the FNDM. There is a reason why they pretend to be down to earth, why they pretend that they are not a corporation and why even to this day, some RT fans STILL believe that RT is some kind of "indie company". There is nothing inherently wrong with having it. Its kind of even unavoidable.

But what RT does is Cynically abuse that relationship. Just like any other corporation. Overworking animators for example? Part of that has been parasociality, people willing to work for their "loved" company etc.

Things like Miles Cameo, the BB photoshoot? The Vtuber Ruby? They are meant to encourage parasociality. To make it seem like the people, the watchers are "closer" to people performing or related to the show. Its all a cynical ploy to get people to pay money, to watch RWBY etc.

There is a reason why even after the RT expose not too long ago, people just went ahead and forgot about it. There is a reason why RWBYTubers that have previously condemned RT for their BS are now shouting at people to support RWBY, supressing those who criticized V9 and are encouraging people to buy merch.

Its all parasocial BS. BS that leads to extreme behaviours.

Such as, but not limited to - Biphobia, Homophobia, calling people facists for liking characters, calling people abuse apologist, groomers, Stalking. Just to name a few.

Also... On an ending note

Its just shit Vtubing

Consider this an unrelated tangent. I watch Vtubers relatively often, usually clips but sometimes i catch streams. Vtuber lore is usually irrelevant even in corporate settings. What people come to watch are the streamers themselves who usually partially play a character but mostly just act like themselves. Not really being lore accurate is not really of importance.

The thing is, those Vtubers usually dont have really established settings and they stream Multiple hours a day, so it all makes sense.

Why in the fuck is the Vtuber Ruby Rose, not acting like Remnant Ruby Rose!? Im not expecting deep lore drops here. But for crying out loud, why make statements that Rabbits or magic dont exist? Ruby Rose being visiting Earth is an AMAZING roleplaying set-up!

There is no dust, no aura, no Grimm! So many differences between the worlds that Ruby Rose can notice and act out! "Oh anime? We have our own version of that! One of the most watched shows is Sailor Sun! (Because the moon is broken)".

Its just a concept that can pay-off so much! Its an isekai in Vtubing form! As far as im aware Vtuber Ruby Rose doesnt even stream daily so its even easier to stay in character! So why in the bloody hell are we getting Dora of Explorer levels of childishness?

Anyway... Here are my thoughts. Peace out.

[yangscowlick]

You're tags about early hiatus leading to calcified headcanons makes me think about why certain parts of the fandom are so against the idea of yang being butchier and cling to her beacon persona so hard. Odd to me beacon yang's whole thing was she was putting up a front to hide her insecurities, yet early fandom portrayed her as some femme fataleish fashionista that flirted with everyone and talked about her boobs nonstop. But even beacon yang was never like that, and now we have a yang that wears big butch boots and overalls and bomber jackets and likes to manspread and actually it's her gf that likes to get prettied up for their dates while yang watches with heart eyes from afar. Sorry for the essay, I just wonder why early fandom saw a show that telegraphed pretty well that it's about turning tropes on its head and decided "no I want the surface level version of these characters and any change or development that differs from it is bad"

I totally agree and ended up writing an essay in turn!

I think it’s especially annoying when fandom does that with Yang’s V1 “persona” in particular since (1) she got the least amount of development of the girls in V1 (we really don’t “meet” Yang til we get her backstory in Burning the Candle — hell we don’t even get an explanation of her semblance until Painting the Town) and (2) all the girls have grown and changed since we met them, so why are some folks SO stuck on early Yang? But I do think it taking so much longer to really “meet” Yang means there were huge chunks of time between the Yellow Trailer and V1 and then V1 and V2 where people filled her character in how they saw fit and have clung to that.

I think there are sort of two buckets. In the bad faith group are the weebs who saw big boobs and an empty vessel of a character they could project onto. To your point, the show told us from the get-go in her trailer and in her song that she was “more than meets the eye”, but the shonen-brained who are accustomed to fanservice and 2D female side characters saw Yang and assumed she was for Them (and feel betrayed that she isn’t and have made it everyone’s problem). I dont have a lot of patience for those types — they can go watch 99.9% of shonen anime if they want that (though I hope for their sake they expand their media diet…).

I have some more patience for the second bucket who just don’t really understand the lesbian experience and how it can be to re-contextualize your identity once you’ve figured yourself out. Because in some ways you only really “get it” if you’ve gone through it. Yang settling into herself is SO cool to me, because I was similar. In high school, I was pretty femme / assumed I was straight / etc. And even once I understood I liked girls, knowing your identity and integrating your identity are two different things. It’s so normal to me to see Yang “become” Yang as she has (from the way she dresses, her posture, the way she sits, her chivalry, etc) because I lived it. But I think it is lost on some people who just see her “dykeyness” as a retcon and not a development — so to them, I want to try to be patient because I realize what’s obvious to me comes from my lived experiences. (Again, the bad faith folks who wanted surface-level digestible anime waifus don’t get my patience here).

But to those coming at Yang in good faith, Yang coming into herself and getting more butch as time goes on (Yang was always going to be more than her first projection - they spelled it out) is no different than Weiss and Blake settling into their ‘true’ selves (and their color schemes have slowly come to match their aura/soul colors). It’s also a pretty common experience when sexuality is yet another thing piled on top of the identity crisis that is your late teens/early 20s.

I also find it a little silly that people glom onto V1 Yang as this flirty party girl because it’s not even supported by actual canon. Yang plays video games and is like a super-nerd about the table top game they play in V2, but none of those “I miss V1-3 Yang” types are like “why doesn’t she play video games and board games anymore? What a betrayal of her character”? Like why isn’t “gamer bro” Yang part of That fandom’s flanderization of her character? There’s more support in canon for that than her supposed puns…

Anyway, went off on a tangent there, but TLDR: Yang’s butch-ness is completely organic and part of her settling into herself, just as the other characters have settled into their true selves. I dont have time for the folks fueled by entitlement, but I can have time for the folks with empathy who might not have all the inputs to understand it but are willing to listen (and my inbox is open!).

[ask-serendipity-sky]

"I cannot for the love of the gods come up with a theory on why Jk is ok with getting all this nice promo while Jimin got nothing". How about u try to change your solo perspective that makes u look at jimin like a victim all the time? Jimin GOT promotions, and a big one, money related. He had 2 mv that took a lot of budget and preparations: the 2 mv needed sets to be created, and SMFPT2 set was HUGE. He promoted at korean music shows, which too took a lot of money to build those giant sets. Yes, he did have a short promotion period, for reasons we dont know but my guess is that Suga needed to do his comeback because of the tour and i hate the person who came up with those dates but ok... We all know Face promotions got some biiiig problems and im still mad about it, we just dont know what really happened, but i'm sure jimin would fight back if he thought he was being mistreated. But to say that jm got zero promotions... nah

Face, Like Crazy and Seven r different projects, with different visions and different goals. Jimin wanted to tell his story of when he was going through a hard time, and he wanted to do it in korean, promoting more in Korea, with songs that, in the end, only him and people close to him know the meaning. Yet, he did AMAZING and made history (is still making). It seems to me that the #1 on hot100 was unexpected to the company and even jm, but yet they did provided to us 2 versions of Like Crazy, one of them being an eng. ver, and promoted at Jimmy Fallon... So maybe they still hoped that the song would do well internationally? (pdogg tho... he just KNEW face would be massive and destroy kpop). But Jungkook... i think that, for a long time now, he aims to achieve western recognition, way more than jm, and thats ok. So Seven obviously is a song to the US market, and all of us know that. The song is in english, is very pop, written and produced by an american guy that is responsable to other huge hits. It is made to be stuck in our heads, not to make us think about deep things. It is breaking and will break so many records just like LC, but the difference is that the success is THE GOAL (remember all of that Scooter posts on his ig?). Jimin wanted to tell his truth with Face, Jk wants to be closer to being a big pop star with Seven. So, of course Seven would get a different type of promotion.

And btw, just because the song is doing really good and is aiming to the US market, doesnt mean it is by having deals and paying for playing. Its the Jeon Jungkook, of BTS, we are talking about. Jk seems very happy and jimin seems happy for him. I dont think jimin would support jk if he thought he was doing wrong. He didnt post anything, but he did not post about L&R and Dreamers too. He supported jk with Dreamers by posting about his presentation at Qatar, and now he supported seven by going all the way to NYC to be with him.

All of this to say: Jimin is not a victim, he is a badass and he knows how to stand up for himself. When will you come out as a solo, btw? its getting old...

Hi anon,

When will you try thinking for once instead of being a parrot and writing what you've read in other blogs?

Your entire ask is wrong. I don't even know where to start.

YOU sound like a jjk solo or delusional jikooker or Jk biased jikooker.

But you know what? Call me a solo. I don't mind. Anyone who ever defends Jimin or loves Jimin is always called a solo. Why? Because no body else defends him or loves him like solos do. So, sure. Call me a solo.

First of all, we are talking about THE Park Jimin. Of BTS. That's who are talking about.

I'm done with people who, somehow for some delusional reason, think Jimin is inferior to Jungkook. You know nothing about Jimin if you think this.

I've NEVER said that Jimin got 0 promotions. I've been screaming (into the void, apparently) that Jimin only got 9 days of promo that were too hard on his body and had to wear it kt tape for weeks after. I've been screaming that the company is sabotaging him and it's true. People who actually know things about the company know this quite well too.

Take a look at everything and the sabotage is obvious. But look let's start here:

This same guy posts on DC gallery:

Yes, Jimin's promo costs money. But so did everyone's. How much do you think payola costs? That's much pricier than what Jimin's promo costs. And either way, Jimin was a return investment.

Not only did Jimin's place on the charts affect Hybe. It also affected other companies.

And right now the stock at Hybe at decreasing and foreign shareholders are selling to make it seem like Jk's position on the chart will have a bigger impact than it actually will:

Just watch.

You are proving me right with everything else:

So sure, let's sacrifice Jimin's promo time for Suga even though Suga was the one that postponed his album because it wasn't ready.

Jimin had 2 mvs. Suga had how many? And he had a whole tour too.

Jimin didn't have any visualizers. Jk had how many?

Jimin had 5 versions of Like Crazy. Jk has how many?

Jimin's Like Crazy cd was never stocked. Jk's has been stocked how many times?

You think Jimin doesn't want international recognition? Like Crazy was released in ENGLISH for a purpose.

After Jimin's no.1, if they wanted Like Crazy to succeed in the US market, they would have at least sent it to radio. This would have avoided freefall. They would have also shipped albums on time. They would have also informed us of the rule change for online sales instead of waiting until Suga's album was coming out.

It was the fans that were begging radio to play Like Crazy and the only way to play it was from the mv on YouTube:

There are so many things they could have done differently. They can still do them but they choose not to.

Did you see what was trending today?

Did you trend this, anon? Since you are so "mad about this"?

You think FACE wasn't created with success in mind? Pdogg came out and said it would break kpop because Pdogg knew what masterpiece FACE is.

You don't have to think deep with Like Crazy or any of the song...um just listen to them?

And don't be daft about Seven:

And other things. Search "Seven payola" on twitter and you will find it.

So yeah. You are wrong.

If you don't see it, that's because you choose to not see it.

Stop pretending that you "are still mad about it". You don't care about Jimin and only want him for your stupid ship and for him to be Jk's cheerleader.

Ah and he went to NYC for a work thing and to support Jungkook. But he hasn't posted a single thing about Seven. He did post about Dreamers and Left and Right. But no Seven.

You think Jimin only wanted those close to him to listen to his music and know the meaning? He spent 10 months working on this album, hours practicing choreography, dieting, for stupid fans like you to say things like these?

I don't even want to see when he releases new music, appears in stuff with Jungkook, or leaves for military service. All these fake fans will be crying and uwuing when they couldn't lift a finger for him during all this.

To those that try to send others on guilt trips because we defend Jimin or point out the injustices: Are you guys even streaming Seven and Like Crazy to "support them equally"?

At least taekookers have taekook playlists and streaming parties for Jk and Tae. I haven't seen a single playlist around here that has both Jk and Jimin. But yeah, you all are supporters of jikook.

You all come and try to send me on a guilt trip but you all are worse than me. For reals.

You don't deserve Jimin. You and all the people who keep saying all this bullshit because it fits their stupid theories and shipping fantasies don't deserve him.

Jimin deserves so much more than this.

So just stop. Don't come to my blog.

[almayver]

Ya know how there are coming of age movies about puberty in this reality. Well what if in omegaverse there are coming of age movies about your secondary gender. This brings up a ton of questions… I.e. Which demographic would it be market to? Alphas or Omegas? Would there be a health class 2 for your secondary gender? In omegaverse which one has the more-- girly-- type of marketing where it's used against omega's by alphas who are marketing products but can also show an illusion that omega marketers have power in the industry… Or is it the other way around? Do alphas have to have the kinda awkward advertising that's like "Hey there Alphies (bc they always say like hey girlies or something) don't you just hate when you go into rut (Is that an alpha thing? Haven't read omegaverse in a while) yeah, rut I said it the big r word." How would Betas react to being in the cross fire of this? Do you think there would be debates on whether famous historical figures were alphas/be- tas/omegas in history class and would history sweep AIA or OIO relationships or heck being an omega at all under the rug like being gay was?

Anon, I don't know if you are the original one or just someone that copied and pasted it and sent it my way, but I owe you my life, thank you.

Ok lets go bit by bit

Coming of age movies: I feel like the big blockbuster-y ones would be in a pretty even split, maybe more towards Alphas tho. A lot to explore there about “dangerous” instincts and all that. HOWEVER, the indie ones that become classics? 100% about a Beta born in a family of Alphas, specially considering that in more canons, Beta is the most common secondary gender. Very much talking about not being special, thinking your whole life you are going to be something and then not. Tell me you can't imagine that story with those warm summer colors and soundtrack typical of indie movies.

Health Class: oh, absolutely. You know it's terrible and riddled with stereotypes, but there would def be a very vague health class given for the younger tweens around the age they present. Afterward I imagine some schools do the whole separating the class accordingly and explaining more things, still in a very vague way because even in this universe sex ed is shit. Actually, I think in Tadaima they said that Alphas and Omegas had completely different classrooms/schools, so in that universe I wonder if the info is worse or better.

Marketing: See this one is where it gets fascinating because the one thing about the omegaverse is that it has so many versions! The social hierarchy changes a lot from one version to the other, too. You see some were omegas are seen as more powerful, at least in a traditional way as the "heads" of their dens; while in others we see what I feel is what most people imagine with Alphas being thought of as the “best”. Betas are always kind of ignored, tho. So I feel like a lot of that whole “empowering” thing would depend on a lot of that. I would say for things like ruts and heats and suppressants, if you are in a version more modern and progressive, all of it would be painfully embarrasing and vaguely patronizing with commercials that would be so out of touch they would become memes.

Betas: I honestly think that Betas would generally get the better deal. As I said, in most medias you find them as the majority, and they dont have to suffer through any of the shit the others have to. I assume there would be certain issues about Beta-Beta relatonship, maybe seen as unnatural and stuff, and maybe some issues around infertility. But socially, they probably don't have many problems.

Historical figures: Oh non-traditional abo relationships, my beloved! I do think there would be a lot of sweeping under the rug! Depending on the society, secondary genders could be considered a private thing or alternative way more tied to status than in the modern world, and I bet people would theorize a lot about it. Relationships that don't fit the mold would so be the “They were very good friends” of that universe, and stories about important figures remaining apparently unmated their whole life would make for big Oscar-bait kind of films and stories.

If anyone has more thoughts about them seriously, add them here or send them my way. I fucking adore thinking about the world building of this universe because it's fucking wild no matter what.

[that-starry-freak]

Okay, wow. Uhm.. I'm honestly kind of tired of all the fandom discourse. So i- I want to talk about it.

 This is honestly about to be really personal. So CW for mentions of hypersexuality and grooming(that ones at the very end), as well as mentions of harassment and aphobia. I also vaguing a bit, but its not too explicit (I do name 2 people at some point but im defending them and talking about how they dont deserve to be harassed, so-) and I'm not talking negatively about anyone!

Also please ignore my terrible grammar/spelling. This is kind of just me ranting and in no way is meant to be an actual well written essay or anything

Okay- so- god I was writing this all in my head but now I'm trying to type this out im coming up short

Okay, lets try this- there's no way to really neatly and perfectly segway into what I want to talk about, but I'll try my best

I just really want to talk about the harassment that's been going on in the fandom. Because its really just.. frustrating.

First is the allegations of aphobia.

Yes, aroace people can be aphobic! But can we please learn the difference between projecting and aphobia. 

There are aroace people in this fandom seeing Moon and Nexus and deciding to make them not sex repulsed because they arnt. Ive seen people get called aphobic for making them demiaroace, or aceflux, or just non-repulsed aroace. And I've seen people make fics of awful acts, "correcting" their asexuality, and being purposely tagged wrong.

Which one of these is actual aphobia, hm?

Should have started with this but, yknow, it's too late for that now- ehem, 

Hi! I'm Astro, a aceflux lesbian who struggles with hypersexuality. I, personally, am actually really uncomfortable with people making Moon not aroace and shipping him, even in aus. Im uncomfortable with them even making him not repulsed most of the time. What do I do though? I dont harass people. I just don't interact with the content!

And I have no problem with people making Nexus not repulsed/aroace. Why?? Because canonical hes confused and unsure about if he's aroace or not! And I know a lot of people on the ace and aro spectrum(s), including me, can relate to that feeling. The unsureness of if you are, and even if you know you are, not knowing where you are in the spectrum. I personally love making Nexus somewhere along the lines of demi or gray, because that would add more representation! Especially with Old Moon back now, we have our repulsed rep. That doesn't mean they can't both be repulsed! I'm just saying that having another character be another side of the spectrum (whether its non-repulsed aroace, demiaroace, demiaro and alloace, etc.) Would be nice. 

Personally, I've been tempted to make an au where Nexus started experimenting with sex and it starts clogging his mind. Because I enjoy his character, and I want to project my own experiences onto his character. There's nothing wrong with it?? Self inserting into canon characters is a tale as old as time, just as old as ocs.

There is literally nothing wrong with wanting to have more representation or have a character that represents you. That isn't ace or aro phobic- i don't get how people don't understand that. I know multiple aroace people who like dating, or who are dating. I also know aroace people who just like qprs and can't stand dating. I know aroace people who have been confused and have fluctuated with their sexuality as I've known them, trying to figure themselves out. There are different types, and people want to see themselves in a character that is similar to them. Whats wrong with that?

Now, I am not defending the people who constantly are like "well aroace people can date too", completely ignoring the fact that some are repulsed. I'm not defending the people that say that whenever you mention that a character doesn't like to date because they're repulsed. I've seen it happened to people who literally have aus and are talking about their versions if the character and how they never want to date, and people say that. It's fucking annoying. And ya, pretty aphobic.

But non-repulsed aroace people saying that about their own au versions of characters isn't the same thing. Defending their headcanons of a character because it helps them better connect to it isn't the same thing- im like, so confused about how we don't understand this already??

Another this is- and I can't believe I have to say this -can we NOT fucking harass people??? Like holy shit why do I have to say this?

Yes, this includes people who support terrible things. This includes people who just don't like the same things as you. Yes, this includes people that don't like you.

Because, fun fact, that just makes the situation worse. Someone saying something bad about somebody, and then a bunch of people swarming them and telling them their wrong, isn't going to change their mind. It'll actually just make them have an even more negative view of the person.

Now, spreading awareness about a person who is actively harassing people is different. But that also doesn't mean you should see that awareness and go harass that person. Again, its going to make it worse.

Instead, report. Block. Do whatever you can to keep yourself and others safe. Please don't harass people though. Please.

And yes holy shit this includes if they ship things you don't like! Holy fuck why do I even have to say this- if you disagree with someone, block them. Don't fucking spread rumors. You fucking people keep complaining about all the discourse and then attack shippers. What the fuck?? Stop it. The ones you are attacking don't even do shit, they're just chilling. Some people Eccpecially!! I feel bad about mentioning directly, but people like @/kuuchaos and @/zthesheep (not tagging because I don want to bother them and also im a coward. Wishing them all the support in the world tho) haven't even done anything! They're just getting harassed because they're associated with people these harassers don't like.

Hell, i- who has barely done anything but support people -am terrified of getting harassed. Because I'm associated with these "big blogs", I'm at risk of being harassed. Its ruining my mental health, which was just finally getting better- its frustrating. I literally had to take a break from tumblr because I was so anxious, and I felt sick to my stomach and was shaking a bit. I just want to make friends and have fun and post art, but I'm scared of being yelled at literally becuas elf people who I associate myself with.

I know im at risk just because I'm mutuals with two of these blogs. Just because I post and reblog ship things, and reblog things from these "big blogs". Im- augh. I luckily haven't been harassed, and have blocked the harasser in question, but that doesn't stop the crippling anxiety of the fact that i may be in the future. That's not okay. Its awful that this fandom is so fucked up that people who havnt even done shit are afraid of being harassed- or are actually being harassed!

Can I remind everybody that the VAs literally asked everyone not to harass each other and to just chill out? Sure, I'm all for death of the author, but thats not what that is. You can't just take canon and use it to harass people, but completely ignore the people who made that canon. That's fucked up. Either ignore canon all together, or listen to the VAs. Either you, you have no reason to harass people.

Anyway, I hope soon we can all be a lot nicer to each other. Seriously, I dont care about disagreeing with ships. I dont even think we should all be friends, im not a fucking elementary school teacher. But I think we should all at least be respectful to each other and not literally harass and send fucking gore to people. Eccpecially fuckimg CHILDREN like im sorry whos idea was that?? Those gore anons need to be put in prison because that is one of the most disgusting things I've heard in a fandom- and I've been in some pretty horrific fandoms (*cough*dsmp*cough*)

So uhm- yeah

Please dont harass me for speaking out against harassment, like seriously. I'm not promoting harassment or aphobia, or incest or anything. Especially grooming, considering i may have been groomed by one of my friends in 3rd grade??? Idk, the more you know-

Im also not inviting an argument. Please dont argue with me, please. Or even disagree with me in reblogs or comments or tag me or anything. It may seem childish, but I instinctively want to argue back and I just want to avoid that. Please.

But yeah, let's just be decent to each other pls. Use that nifty block button more, please and thank you <3

(THIS WAS NOT REREAD OR EDITED! plus I was having extreme pain at the end cause of cramps- and I was emotional and frustrated at the beginning. So this all may be a bit incoherent/rude, but im trying

Again, please don't harass me- especially over me talking about my hypersexuality and things- its hard for me and personally <3)