#150lbs in a year and a half

[blueheartedwolf]

I wish I could find a doctor that wants to find out what’s actually wrong with me instead of recommending prescriptions to address the symptoms. I’m so tired of being recommended ibuprofen for debilitating pain. Tired of relaying my medical history to a new doctor and getting the same furrowed brow and shrugging shoulders I get every time. Tired of having so-called medical professionals ask why I need a cane if I’m able to walk down their clinic hallway without it. When will someone fucking help me?

[ploonets]

we don't have any candy to give out however we do have an incredible amount of those small butters they have at diners so maybe the kids will like that

[theehorsepusssy]

The old hood

A. Cucina! Cucina! Was a shitty chain restaurant I managed at the Rose Garden arena (1997-2004) paid well, free food. I weighed nearly 300 lbs

B. Red Lion Hotel parking lot. Where I had to park on game days. Busted smoking pot out of a beer can with my boss. Huge rats and feral cats. Surprised I didn't get fired....or rabies.

C. Memorial Coliseum. I dropped The Red Hot Chili Peppers spaghetti take out order and had to run back to restaurant to replace. Took it back unaccompanied, was waved thru and wandered around backstage trying to find who to give it to. Nearly ended up on stage holding a take out pan of spaghetti during Give It AwayNow

D. Jags was a bar in the hotel where I would go play Video Poker when I was too tweaked to be around customers at my job. It eventually became a Detox center and sober house years later. Fucked a couple straight guys who liked to get freaky for meth hanging out near here

E. Budget motel. Had sleazy sex here a couple times in 90s

F. Warehouse where they held Mr Drummer leather 1990 maybe. my friend stood me up and I was alone.....on acid . There was a sex party afterward-$20 . Large room covered in unrolled black garbage bags. Coil's Hellraiser soundtrack played. I was tripping balls. Saw guys climbing up on a dudes wheelchair and face fucking him. Saw someone getting fisted for first time. Was told to leave while getting a titty twister from leather daddy. Years later, my friend turned the downstairs into Dirty Little Secret salon/spa and that stupid Eagles song "dirty little secret, dirty little lies, dirty little fingers in everybody's pies" gets stuck in my head and I think of the aforementioned fisting I witnessed

G. Walgreens I went to daily. Where to buy needles with a side of eye roll because I would confuse my insulin size order with the dope size other order. No ATM fees there.

H. Head Shop across from Franks Noodle House. Lousy meth pipe selection. If any. Dunno. I never smoked it always some trick would whine that they would only smoke and we'd end up here.

I. Lloyd Center mall. The bottom level bathroom was a decent place to poop when I was homeless for a while

J. The park I had registered as my "home" when I was homeless.

K. The hotel where I went to a Craigslist sex party and the host had a suitcase full of Ethyl Chloride cans and huffed so much we thought he died for a moment. Half the guys attending kept repeating " I'm straight, I've never done this before" I wish I had a camera

L. My mom worked here. I avoided these blocks for years, afraid of bumping into her while I was high

M. Tony Roma's Ribs. This was an occasional night out for me and Robert 1992-95. There used to be street whores on MLK back then

N. Hotel to party at. Call girls worked this one hard. You could still smoke in the rooms

O. The Red Robin I worked at for 2 weeks 1996. Worst job ever. I was told to learn to steal cuz no one tips. It was true

P. Courtyard Marriot. I would use lobby ATM for dope money if I was in a hurry. Met a online hookup there many years earlier who used a fake pic. Got there and dude was like 500lbs and asks if I can give him some meth and i ask how much he want to spend and fat boy gets all cheap and wants free and I'm thinking if I want to try and rob him before a moment of clarity and I leave

Q. The McDonald I got "groceries" at the last year I was using. I ate maybe once a week. I weighed 150lbs. It's by a Burger King that never had any customers the 20 years I was in the area. Is it a mirage? Is it haunted? Is it a money laundering front?

R. The 7/11 where I bought Camel Lights and Diet Mt Dew everyday. The old owners would whip out their shotguns when robbed. The new owners just let the robbers take the money

S. The seminary and Catholic church. You would see priests with unaccompanied minors at the Wendys across street. Suspicious. One night I was out smoking a cigarette and all the Catholics came marching out of the church playing Jesus dress up for Easter and the parade passed me and one dude thought I looked destitute and whipped out some cash for me and all Bless You my child or some shit. I was gonna give it back but went up to 7/11 for cigarettes and Diet Mt Dew. Thanks Jesus!

T. The Merrick. Casa de Horsepussy 2009-2016. 90% of all those old pics I post are on that block

U. Serene Court (a.k.a. Syringe Court) apartments.Used to be cheapest apartments in downtown area when I first moved here. Was exotic to cross the river from downtown proper to buy a bag of crank in this spooky old place

V. The Yards. I had an employee who sold pot lived here. I had to fire him. It was awkward as fuck

W. The Greyhound station was where to find heroin from someone who sold to someone I knew. Probably an open fent market these days

X. The Main Post Office. I had a meth dealer 2002ish that would mail tweak to NYC cuz those people would pay ridiculous price for an 8ball. He would get nervous about going in saying he was too high and have me mail it. Only later did he tell me what was in package

Y. Fancy loft area where one time I was having very intense drug induced roll play sex with some guy and he was veering into some script where I was his wife who drugged his beer and yeah, ok but then I think he just wanted a beer but it was all blurred reality with the sex game and I put 2 Zyprexa in his beer bottle and dude went down...hard. I had to dress him and get him back to his loft but he was practically dead from the sedatives and I didn't know where he lived exactly and just kind of rolled him out the car onto the curb off Lovejoy and sped off at 4am.

Z. My dad worked at some building under the 405. I lived a few blocks up the street and would find other routes to walk to the arena for fear of running into him

[inkedbookboyfriend]

Vulnerable StoryTime 2024 in review:

(Please do not reblog. But know if I can get through the following and still be super positive and optimistic, then so can you. I believe in you and hope my story helps)

2024... Wow, what a year!! Started off with new years day 911 call and getting admitted to the ER for a month. During that time I was dating a gal who I was in a volatile/narcissistic relationship with. We were planning on getting a place and I was going to raise her son as my own (that she was pregnant with when we met and already had 3 other kids so what was one more right 🤷🏻 i always wanted to be a dad) and kid was born in November and things were great. Then January happened. Got admitted for my flare up of ulcerative colitis and went through three infusion treatments and couldn't get it under control.

January 24th I woke up in my hospital bed screaming to "get it the f**k out of me" as my colon went mega toxic colon and I was distended the size of a beach ball (it was dead and exploding inside of me) had it removed. No more colon and was left with an ileostomy bag to shit in for the rest of my life (if I chose not to do jpouch procedure) and my life was forever changed.

I had almost died from organ failure due to malnutrition from not eating since December 2nd (was down from 207 in prime shape working out everyday to 150lbs) had a pick line put in with a bag of nutrients to keep me alive during this. The whole time in the hospital the girl I was dating never came to see me. We fought etc and not to mention on January 16th the baby passed away due to sids during that major icestorm we had (she lived two hours away in Eugene where it was very bad. So here I am almost dying, baby I was planning on being a dad to died, malnutrished, 150lb skeleton, lost my Colon, stuck shitting in an ileostomy bag and then she ghosts me (which I understood her baby dying I can't imagine how she felt)...

I get pushed out of hospital a week later and scared af, traumatized by so much of everything and get massive infection 3 days after being released and taken back to hospital. Surgery number two to insert drainage tube and was there most of February. Get out and have two massive wounds from on surgical line from the infection.

Then she pops back up out of no where and find out she was cheating on me and having a whole ass other full time relationship with another guy and she was cheating on him with another guy on top of that! Like wtf how is this possible! Literally extremely sick and twisted... so that ends! Then comes the worst shit you can say to another human being "Of course I cheated. You have a bag of shit stuck to the side of you. I'd never touch you again. No woman will. I was only with you for your money anyways and that's all you'll ever be good for now. No one wants to be with someone like that". Dude I've never been so hurt in my entire life.... I wanted to die after everything I had been through and still dealing with.

Back to health: so now I'm going to wound care 3 times a week to have dressing changed for a month then get a wound vac put on for another month and a half and during that time trying to learn to change this stupid bag lol (I had the hardest time doing that) now we're in May and end back up in the hospital for a week for infection again.

Then out of nowhere I wake up one night in pain! Horrible pain and can't move. Took 30 minutes to get out of bed and another month of Dr appointment and test and then get to rheumatologist to find out that my ulcerative colitis now attacks my joints like severe rheumatoid arthritis because it is an autoimmune disease. Even though my colon was gone it now attacks this, greeeeeat. So I now have to take an injection 💉 once a week on top of a ton of other meds and an ungodly amount of pain meds just to function daily. I still get flare ups but they are now short and fast lived. Few days max but they are rough and I hurt like he'll.

Then I meet Jessica. An amazing woman whom I adored and we would just talk for hours. She was a great woman and mom and she made me feel like a human being again. Helped restore my confidence and made me realize how much of a good man I really was. I gave her and her kiddo the world and summer and fall were great. However, she had alot of emotional Baggage and abuse she was dealing with from her ex (won't go into detail but was alot) and unfortunately it just wasn't going to work. We split up and that was rough too because it was a great relationship for what it was. Just wrong timing but we both got what we needed from the other to grow as people.

Then surgery number 3 happened during this time too and she was great (unlike the other one lol) and it went could to clean up all the scar tissue and and pull my stomach facia back together because it had split from the infection. But a day later I developed a hematoma along the whole surgical line. Basically a 13" blood clot and they had to go back into surgery again 2 days later.(#4 this year) and recovering this time was so much harder. Last few months had no energy and way more difficult due to the amount of trauma my body has been through.

Now I didn't cover all but the main parts. Here is what I took from this year.

It was the hardest, weakest, strongest and most challenging and growing year of my life. I had my lowest lows and my highest highs.

I found and lost love twice (which is surprising in itself considering I never date) I mourned the loss of a child, but I experienced him for a month and a half prior so was blessed with that even though he wasn't mine, I endured the most narcissistic/manipulative person alive, I found the most amazing, kind, loyal and encouraging person too, I learned true patience and understanding from her and her situation, I learned healing and self dependence on a level I never knew existed, I found myself after losing myself, I accepted total defeat and over came it, I found strength I never knew anyone could have, I found compassion and empathy in ways I can't explain because I also found true forgiveness and actually forgive Mariah for the evil she did.

Life is never what we expect it nor will it ever be perfect. We can only choose to be patient and understanding of everything we have and be fully grateful for life itself! It is so short my friends... so short. Make the most of it. Take chances. Take risks. Give yourself the opportunity to have an amazing life and be happy but most of all find your peace.

Find forgiveness and let go of the pain and hurt others caused you. We are not what has happened to us. We are not what anyone has done to us. Those were actions and choices reflecting on them. Let it go.

Find the people who choose you consistently day in and day out and please be kind.. always be kind to others because you never know what they're going through.

If I can get through and handle all that and still happy, smiling, helping others, trying to make as many people smile and laugh as possible, then you can get through whatever you're going through I promise you! I believe and have faith in you and am always here for anyone whoever needs to talk!

P.S.

GO TO DISNEYLAND & GET A TATTOO!!

(My cousin took me for the first time in my life, and it was my dream come true)

[brains4brawn]

Journalled

It was a small thing, tucked away in the corner of the thrift shop. Victor had pulled it out, but the book was locked and bound in gold and wouldn't open. His mind piqued, Victor bought the book and took it home. Over the next week He tried everything to undo the clasp but nothing worked. When he had just lost hope a tiny but audible Click could be heard, Victor rushed back to find the clasp undone and the bindings slightly ajar.

Victor carefully opened the ancient tome only to find that the pages were stuck. it was like they had been glued! Only the last page remained free. Written towards the top if fancy handwriting

"Write it down so i can enact Be-warned Though, What is written I can not retract!"

Under neath that was 5 evenly spaced lines. and another message at the bottom,

"I only remain open for this 1 day Until 5 complete Earth circle's will I open again"

Looking at the the 3 blank lines, And thinking this must be a joke he wrote

I will graduate from college

My older brother will never pick on me again

Over the next 20 years I will gain 150lbs

As Victor finished the book slammed shut and relocked itself. Scared Victor threw the book into his closet and ran down stairs.

That night his family recieved word that Victor's older brother was in a bad car crash. He was alive but in the ICU and had lost his legs. Certainly the taller brother would never pick on the shorter Victor again.

The crash had been the fault of the manufacturer so the family received and huge settlement. This money paid for Victor's choice of college.

Two years later, when Victor was home from college for the summer and his mother commented that he was finally starting to get bigger.

The 20 Year old checked the scale and sure enough he weighed 140, 15lbs heaver then when he was 18. Victor knew it had to be the book.

Victor: 22, 155lbs

The College graduate was now 23 and moving all of his stuff from his half of the bedroom to his first apartment when he stumbled across the book. Looking at the date on the wall Victor realized it was exactly 5 years since he had last seen the cursed object. As if it had a mind of its own the book opened to the last page, now with three new empty lines waiting to be filled.

Victor hesitated, he had imagined for the last 5 years what he'd do if he had this chance again. He could fix everything!

My older brother James develops a prosthesis so he can walk and run again.

My younger sisters will grow into smart talented women who will want for nothing.

Looking at his tiny 15 year old brother Bastion asleep on the bed Victor writes:

Bastion will grow up to be the popular jock just like his older brother.

Satisfied, the book shuts itself and prepares to grant Victor's wish.

Victor 24, 170lbs

For the most part the Wishes went like Victor planned. Well except for Bastion's. In the proceeding months after writing those words Victor found himself becoming more popular and Jock-like. Words like Bro or Bruh, dude, man, had taken over. He joined a gym and from there joined some local sports teams. When he wasn't busy at work or working out Victor could be found screwing every chick he could find. No girl was immune to his baby faced charms and his Gym sculpted body.

Victor 26 185lbs

Victor 28 200lbs

Victor practically lives in the Gym now. His gains speak for themselves his body is a temple and he loves for chicks to worship him. His younger sisters call him a man whore, while Bastion is turning out just like him.

His girlfriend of 6 months broke up with him cause she caught him in bed with her mother.

Looking in his closet he stumbles over the Book, open and waiting for him to write something down.

In his jealousy of those gay guys who can sleep with anyone he wrote:

I'm like 100% gay, no chicks only dicks.

I wont get any STD's from sex.

Sex with me will change anyone's life.

Again the book closes and gets to work.

Victor 30, 215lbs

Vic the dick had been out for 2 years now, the book took the man whore and turned him into a man slut. Everyone wanted a piece of him and at least Vic was smart enough to charge them for his services. Every option on the table is open he'd do any guy and make them feel like his number1. Every guy he slept with changed, most upped their stamina but some hunked out into gay sluts just like Vic.

Hell even Bastion had come out and if the rumors are true he's slept with every guy at his college.

Vic 32 230lbs

Vic was becoming something of a local celebrity in the gay community. His looks had caught the eye of a movie producer and now he was staring in low budget action movies as the gay savior. He had been so busy that he wasn't home for his 33rd birthday. Some how the book found him on location in the bottom of his travel bag.

Vic watched as it opened up to the last page with 3 empty spaces.

He took his time and pondered over what he should write.

I want to find true love

I want to be content

I want to be smart again

The book seemed to close with a sigh. None of these were worth the trouble of granting. But a deal is a deal.

Vic 34, 245lbs

Vic, 38, 275lbs

Finally after 20 years, Vic had stopped growing. Life had settled down for the Gay icon, nowadays, he owned a successful chain of LGBTQIA Gyms that catered towards the community needs. He organized Pride events and helped with protests when needed. He looked at the open book on his desk. It was tempting but Vic no longer wanted to change anything about his life. Even though he had never found a lifelong partner.

He decided he had held on to the magic for to long, so he summoned his newest intern Jack and gave the book to him then let him leave so he could explore this newest acquisition.

*bright flash of Light*

The intercom beeps and Vic pushes the button.

"Sir your husband just arrived to collect you. He wants to remind you that you still have to pick up the kids and get changed for tonights ceremony"

Before he could even answer the door burst open and Vic's husband of 7 years strolled in. Vic was already out of his chair and giving Jack a pec on the cheek while grabbing his toned ass.

On his way out Vic glanced at the family photo on his desk and gave a silent thanks to the book.

[isalisewrites]

hi, if it's not too much could you write the description of the main characters because i keep forgetting how they look and i can't find the exact paragraphs they were described 😭

No, sweetie, it's not too much to ask!

The reality is the current draft of Terrible, But Great does not have good descriptions of the main Slytherin boys, so it's not your fault at all. There are two reasons for this.

One, I didn't know them very well and created them out of necessity. They've really solidified their presence in the story since then.

And, two, I have aphantasia, which means I don't conjure images in my head at all. I know what an apple looks like, but I can't picture it in my head. So, I tend not to describe character appearances in enough detail because if I don't know them well enough, I can't vibe out what they look like.

I'm going through a comprehensive edit of Arc One and Arc Two to make up for this. There are a number of minor mistakes/inconsistencies that I want to fix. I've already updated chapter one with what I consider a final edit and am currently working on chapter two. I'll be adding better descriptions of the boys in the prose in my edits.

However, let me give you some of my resources that I've created and that my Archivist, Dede, has created. Dede created the outfit collages.

Hopefully, this will help!

Ages reflect chapter 53's date, which is February 28th, 1943.

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Terrible, But Great Profiles:

True Name: Harry James Potter Time Travel Name: (Harrison) Harry James Evans Height: 5’4”/163cm | 5’6”/168cm by September 1st, 1943 Appearance: wild chin length black hair, hooded emerald green eyes, amber brown tanned skin, square face shape with soft features Body type: Mesomorph/lean muscle (currently underweight) Ethnicity and Lineage: English | patrilineal lineage: Indian | matrilineal lineage: Welsh and French Weight: 85lbs/38.5kg | 110lbs/49.9kg by September 1st, 1943 Birthday: July 31st, 1925 (technically age 18, but time travel fuckary) Sign: Leo Wand 1: Holly, Phoenix Feather, nice and supple, eleven inches Wand 2 (not in possession, but is the acknowledged owner): Elder, Thestral Hair, unyielding, fifteen inches Sexuality: biromantic, bisexual Gender Spectrum Expression: male, 95% masculine, 5% feminine

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Name: Tom Marvolo Riddle  Height: 6’2”/188cm Appearance: curled brown hair, round dark brown eyes, pale white skin, rectangle shaped face with refined features Body type: Ectomorph/slender muscles Ethnicity and Lineage: English | French Norman Weight: 135lbs/61.2kg (should put on some weight) Birthday: December 31st, 1925 | 6th year/17 years old Sign: Capricorn Wand: Yew, Phoenix Feather, slightly yielding, thirteen and a half inches Sexuality: demiromantic, asexual/demisexual Gender Spectrum Expression: male, 80% masculine, 20% feminine

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Name: Alphard Black Height: 6’1”/186cm Appearance: wavy dark brown hair, almond shaped grey eyes, olive white skin, diamond shaped face with refined features Body type: Mesomorph/average muscles Ethnicity and Lineage: English | French and Anglo-Saxon Weight: 170lbs/70.1kg Birthday: April 21st, 1926 | 6th year/16 years old Sign: Taurus Wand: Poplar, Phoenix Feather, swishy, thirteen inches Traits: observant, sleeps wherever while aware of his surroundings, wise, has integrity, playful, DGAF attitude, protective of his brothers, skilled in the finer details, pushy, overbearing, charms speciality. Sexuality: homoromantic, pansexual Gender Spectrum Expression: male, 85% masculine, 15% feminine

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Name: Quintus Prince Height: 5’10”/178cm Appearance: straight and thick chin length true black hair, upturned shaped dark/almost black eyes, fair white skin, oval shaped face with delicate small features Body type: Ectomorph/slender muscles Ethnicity and Lineage: English | patrilineal lineage: Anglo-Saxon | matrilineal lineage: Zhuang Chinese Weight: 150lbs/68kg Birthday: May 19th, 1926 | 6th year/16 years old Sign: Taurus Wand: Beech, Unicorn Hair, solid, ten inches Traits: gentle, kind, playful, mischievous, sensitive, elegant, protective of Eileen (younger sister), cowardly, not the best with tact, impatient, potions specialty Sexuality: homoromantic, homosexual Gender Spectrum Expression: male, 65% masculine, 35% feminine

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Name: Roland Rosier Height: 5’11”/181cm Appearance: somewhat short light brown hair, tawny beige skin (darkens when sun tanned), hooded grey eyes, rectangle shaped face with handsome chiseled features Body type: Ectomorph/muscular Ethnicity and Lineage: English French | Celtic Weight: 175lbs/79.3kg Birthday: December 5th, 1925 | 6th year/17 years old Sign: Sagittarius Wand: Dogwood, Antipodean Opaleye Dragon Heartstring, Flexible, twelve inches Traits: loyal, crass, lady’s man, lustful, playful, jokester, care of magical creatures specialty Sexuality: heteroromantic, heterosexual Gender Spectrum Expression: male, 95% masculine, 5% feminine

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Name: Simon Avery Height: 6’5”/196cm Appearance: short black hair, round dark black eyes, deep rich dark black skin, heart shaped face with soft, yet chiseled features Body type: Mesomorph/very muscular Ethnicity and Lineage: Black English | Ugandan Weight: 210lbs/95.2kg Birthday: August 26th, 1926 | 6th year/16 years old Sign: Virgo Wand: Cedar, Swedish Short-Snout Dragon Heartstring, reasonably supple, twelve and a half inches Traits: athletic, smart, good memory, quiet, stoic, anxious around crowds and public speaking, straight laced, dry humor, protective, loyal, guard dog energy, passive, avoids conflict, Quidditch specialty Sexuality: demiromantic, heterosexual Gender Spectrum Expression: male, 100% masculine

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Name: Sebastian Lestrange Height: 6’0”/184cm Appearance: wild dark brown hair, downturned bright dark eyes, fawn white skin, rectangle shaped face with refined features Body type: Mesomorph/average muscle Ethnicity and Lineage: English Irish French | Celtic Weight: 172lbs/78kg Birthday: November 20th, 1925 | 6th year/17 years old Sign: Scorpio Wand: Red Oak, Hungarian Horntail Dragon Heartstring, Unyielding, ten and a half inches Traits: protective, intelligent, possessive, vengeful, an asshole, impatient, complaining 24/7, smart mouth, transfiguration specialty. Sexuality: grayromantic, bisexual Gender Spectrum Expression: male, 100% masculine

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Birth Name: Marcus Mulciber True Name: Maia Mulciber Height: 5’9”/176cm Appearance: short black hair, round hazel grey eyes, pale white skin, round shaped face with soft features Body type: Ectomorph/slender muscle Ethnicity and Lineage: English | Roman Weight: 125lbs/56.6kg Birthday: June 25th, 1926 | 6th year/16 years old Sign: Cancer Wand (pre-transition): Black Walnut, Peruvian Vipertooth Dragon Heartstring, Brittle, eight and a half inches (stops working altogether) Wand (post-transition): Hawthorn, Unicorn Hair, pliant, nine and a half inches Traits: hard worker, dedicated, attentive, an asshole, doesn’t like much of anything, depressed, pessimistic, moody, healing specialty. Sexuality: biromantic, heterosexual Gender Spectrum Expression: trans female, 25% masculine, 75% feminine

[deadmandead10845]

This is Brandon. Brandon is a 2L (second year) student at a top tier law school. He is a very hard worker putting himself through law school alone. He survives off a diet of ramen and similar cheap foods and hardly gets enough of it. He weighs just 150lbs. He just scored an offer from a big law firm which means he gets to spend his summer between 2L and 3L as a summer associate at lawyer salary. He can’t wait to have enough money to survive.

After spending a summer with money, Brandon learned how much he loved fine cuisines and eating out. He was at cocktail parties and drinking and eating a lot too. He was shocked to see on the scale that he gained 60lbs from May to September. Ultimately he felt defeated as he had no time to work out and lose weight as a 3L law student. He grew a patchy beard to try to cover his double chin, but everyone knew that he got porky.

Throughout his last year as a student, he kept up the eating and burned through the money he saved during the summer. After graduating, he started work at the firm but couldn’t wait to get his first paycheck. He was in no position to buy a new suit and it stopped fitting him. He knew that there was no chance the coat would button. Brandon wasn’t shocked this time when he stepped on the scale and saw 270lbs. He knew he’d been eating and he had no time to burn it off. He thought now that he was graduated he would have the time. He was so wrong.

Brandon was working 70-80 hour weeks coming home exhausted and often ordered takeout to the firm’s office. Within just a few months he had crossed 300lbs. He had never had access to so much money or food especially with the last 3 years being borderline starving on 79 cent ramen cups from the campus vending machines. It was impossible to resist grabbing a bite when he could.

Before he knew it, Brandon had already outgrown all of his new suits. All of the other associates had put on a few pounds too and Brandon kept telling himself it was the same thing. The difference was the associates were maybe 20lbs heavier and had dad bods, and he was nearly 80lbs heavier coming close to 360lbs. He had never been heavier in his life and had never dreamed of being half the size he was. He was out of control. Not even 2 years ago, he was just under 200lbs.

It felt like everyday that Brandon would rip something, pop a button, or knock something over with his immense size and girth. He was getting really self conscious of his weight until one of the paralegals took a liking to him. At this point, Brandon was 32, single, unhappy with his body, well over 400lbs, and spending most of his life in the office. Brandon thought the paralegal was joking when he called him handsome. After whittling away at Brandon, he finally asked him out and they became boyfriends. His name was James.

Brandon knew something was up with him because whenever they were intimate, James would play with his belly and comment on his size. He would even dress up in Brandon’s massive suits and pants. It wasn’t until Brandon’s 33rd birthday when James brought a family sized cake to his apartment. Brandon thought maybe this was a surprise party and his friends were hiding in the other room, but James brought it with the intention to feed it all to him. Every time Brandon would eat a slice, James would spend a few seconds sucking him 0ff, but when he got somewhat close, would stop and wait until Brandon ate another slice. After two tiring hours, Brandon had finished the entire cake and finished HARD into James. Brandon spent the entire week thinking about how hot that interaction was and asked James to do it again.

Within weeks, this became the normal and Brandon and James had introduced food into their nightly routine and consequently Brandon began to pile on the pounds. This headshot of him at 450lbs was probably the last time he was able to close a suit around his girth. Now that James was appreciating him for his size, he didn’t hate how he looked anymore and embraced that he was the big guy in the firm. The other associates couldn’t recognize him from when he started working there.

Brandon and James have been dating for a few years now, and Brandon’s belly really showed for it. He was just over 520lbs and he loved it. He had to get a second seat on the plane when he traveled for work, learned the tricks to how to get a meal expensed and would get massive amounts of food expensed so he could outgrow his next suit. He looked forward to outgrowing clothes thanks to James.

At 38, Brandon made partner. He was at his heaviest as always but he was really struggling to stay mobile. Brandon was tipping scales at 660lbs and still happy with James. They were now engaged to be married and planning a wedding.

[multidimensionalbedandbreakfast]

Legal Disclaimer

The Sojourner’s Rest is an adult establishment, catering to adult patrons of eXtrEMe GiRth varying needs from across many different dimensions.

The Proprietress is 18+ and only 18+ patrons are admitted. The Proprietress is not responsible for any minors who arE cLaiMEd By tHe VoiD get lost in the Forest.

The Proprietress reserves the right to anNiHiLaTE deny service to any patron found violating the establishment’s policy of universal love, acceptance, and compassion.

Check ‘#the sign’ for a list of welcome kinks.

LoOk At tHe @multidimensionalbulletinboard oR eLsE

dOn’T bREaK kaYfAbE

ThERe iS No stATuE.

Welcome to the Forest

Nestled into a grove in a verdant forest, itself the heart of an inter-dimensional nexus, sits an idyllic cottage. This is the Sojourn’s Rest, an establishment that patronizes those who are passing between dimensions, putting them up for a night, as well as providing refuge for those that has become lost in the Forest. Smoke drifts up from the stone chimney, and a warm light emanates from the windows, inviting you to come inside, to mingle with whomever may be inside, and to rest…

…Or, you could ignore it, and press on through the forest, in search of the portal which will bring you to your destined dimension. Just don’t get lost~

Guest Book bellow~

(Pictures of guests may be outdated!!! So hard to find film in the Forest!!!)

Residents of The Sojourner’s Rest

[A picture of an adorable woman is pinned here. Her vibrant red hair is luscious and long, flowing freely down her back to her waist. Her emerald eyes shine with enthusiasm, and a bright smile dimples full, lightly freckled cheeks.]

Lucy Loveless

110lbs., 5’4”, ?? y.o.

Human B&B Proprietress

Ayyy, lmao, it me, ya gurl! (I miss the internet so much). I figure if I’m going to take down information about my guests, it’s only fair I do the same for myself. I run the Sojourner’s Rest — which is actually my second, and much more successful B&B. I’ve just always liked taking care of other people, so this just seems like the job for me! I’m not exactly sure how I got here, or how long I’ve been here, but even if I could get home somehow, I don’t think I would go. I’m much happier here, and it’s not like there was anyone who’d miss me.

Guests from Faerûn

Lae’zel

180lbs., 6’1”, 20 y.o.

Githyanki LV 12 Battle Master Fighter

Str: 20, Dex: 14, Con: 16, Int: 8, Wis: 12, Cha: 8

This one scares me… always hissing, always making noises that feel like swears… It’s like living with cat that hates you. A mean, hissing cat you really want to rub the belly of but it won’t let you. But instead of a cat, it’s a muscly frog lady, and instead of getting scratched by claws, you get run through by a giant silver sword. So, you know, it’s risk versus reward.

Shadowheart

150lbs., 5’6”, 40 y.o.

High Half-Elf LV 12 Light Domain Cleric of Selûne

Str: 12, Dex: 18, Con: 14, Int: 10, Wis: 20, Cha: 10

In the name of the Moon, she will punish you! Haha! Uh… Anyway, she really likes the whole ambiance of the cottage, she’s especially fond of the flower garden. She has a love for life I’ve seen before; the kind you only develop after years of not living.

Karlach Cliffgate

230lbs., 6’1”, 30 y.o.

Zariel Tiefling LV 8 Oath of Vengeance Paladin LV 4 Battle Master Fighter

Str: 18, Dex: 10, Con: 14, Int: 8, Wis: 10, Cha: 18

She’s like a big teddy bear! A big, muscly, flaming teddy bear. And I don’t mean flaming as in, flamboyantly homosexual. (Although, c’mon, look at her) She’s literally flaming, there are little holes in her that fire comes out of, and her hair is also kind of fire? And not like, as in really cool and awesome. (Although, c’mon, look at her). It like, glows and is hot, but it doesn’t burn up. That all said, she’s a big sweetie who I bet is great for cuddling on a cold night~

Minthara Baenre

170lbs., 5’7”, 100 y.o.

Lolth-Sworn Drow LV 5 Assassin Rogue LV 7 Gloomstalker Ranger

Str: 8, Dex: 18, Con: 14, Int: 12, Wis: 12, Cha: 14

I don’t understand how a person can just be mean. I get some people are mean, but to just be mean? Nothing else, and for no reason? I can’t imagine how a person ends up that way. She’s rude to the other guests, so full of herself, and gets violent at the drop of a hat. She is — and I never thought I would say this about a person — totally beyond any kind of redemption. And I want her to spit on me.

Leslie Applebottom/‘Lez’

40lbs., 3’0”, 34 y.o.

Lightfoot Halfing College of Lore Bard

Str: 8, Dex: 16, Con: 8, Int: 14, Wis: 12, Cha: 20

I never thought someone so small could be so intimidating… and I never thought someone so intimidating could be such a sweetie! Always in a chipper mood, compliments my cooking, offers to help out around the cottage (she’s very handy!), even plays music for free! She seems to be the one who resolves any conflict among her friends, using her words to make sure things don’t come to blows, but she’s not afraid to use her aforementioned intimidating presence to solve problems as well! Seducing them to make them docile also doesn’t seem to be off the table…

Dame Cynthia Hale

180lbs., 6’, 30 y.o.

Human LV 12 Oath of Ancients Paladin Zariel Tiefling LV 5 Fiend Warlock LV 7 Broken Oath Paladin

Str: 8, Dex: 8, Con: 16, Int: 14, Wis: 12, Cha: 20

Dame Cynthia may just be one of the most polite guests I’ve ever had! So gallant and chivalrous, and dashing in that shiny heavy armor~ I guess I should expect nothing less from such a pious and selfless knight! A hero using her own body as a shield for the innocent! …Of course, Humans don’t have horns and tails, and Paladins don’t smell of sulfur, yet she wants me to believe that’s what she is? I’m not that naïve. I would not recommend bringing it up to her, though. She crushed a mug with her bare hand when I did, and she likes me!

Goodberry

135lbs, 6’2”, 269 y.o.

Wood Elf LV 12 Circle of the Moon Druid

Str:8, Dex: 14, Con: 16, Int: 8, Wis: 20, Cha: 12

Now this is a tricky one to keep track of! She’s a cat as often as she is an Elf, and a bear twice as often as that! When I asked her about her name, she said that she changed her name when she changed her real body’s look, and I guess if you can change your body as easily as you can change your name, why wouldn’t you? I would give myself extra arms to clean better… She’s a good guest, very mellow and good spirited, and would be a pleasure to be around if it weren’t for her… well, smell. It’s funny, of all the animals I’ve seen her turn into, a skunk is not one of them, but I always smell one when she’s around…

Maddison Murphy/‘Paunch Drunk Murphy’

200lbs., 5’7”, 42 y.o.

Human LV 8 Way of the Open Fist Monk, LV 4 Thief Rogue

Str: 8, Dex: 20, Con: 16, Int: 8, Wis: 16, Cha: 10

So, I think she used to be called ‘Punch Drunk Murphy’, being that fighting drunk was her whole thing, but the ‘a’ got added when she developed a, well, paunch from all her drinking. Not much has changed there, though now she relies on throwing her weight around rather than using any strength, and nobody can hit her because she wobbles around so much. She’s… boisterous, let’s say. And very fond of her drink, obviously. I’d prefer it if she were less rowdy, but she’s not technically breaking any rules, so I can’t really do anything about it… Hard to believe she’s technically the oldest of her party. And a mother!

Talica Dahlmass

140lbs., 5’6”, 47 y.o.

Drow Half-Elf Necromancy Wizard

Str: 8, Dex: 16, Con: 14, Int: 20, Wis: 10, Cha: 10

She’s the most level-headed and calm of her friends, and honestly? That makes her the scariest. She’s cold. Calculating. Charming Conniving. She knows what it takes to get what she wants, and she’s willing to do it. If helping will get her what she wants, she’ll help. If hurting advances her goals, she’ll hurt. It makes no difference to her. That kind of raw, self serving ambition never leads anywhere good. And everywhere she goes, an aura of death hangs over her… I swear I smell rot on her as well…

Cirice

150lbs., 5’8”, 22 y.o.

High Half-Elf Wild Magic Sorcerer

Str: 8, Dex: 14, Con: 16, Int: 10, Wis: 10, Cha: 20

Definitely the most… unpredictable guest I’ve ever had. It’s almost like she doesn’t think about what she does, she just acts on impulse. That has to be it; I can’t think of a rational explanation for half the thing she does. One minute she’s cleaning her clothes, the next she’s setting them on fire. One minute she’s beating someone within an inch of their life, the next she’s kissing them (although that seems to be the common theme for this bunch). One minute, there’s light and life in her eyes, the next… someone else is in there…

Grymglain Stoneflow

200lbs., 4’4, 44 y.o.

Deurgar LV 12 Berserker Barbarian

Str: 20, Dex: 16, Con: 16, Int: 8, Wis: 10, Cha: 8

She won’t come inside the cottage. Instead she sets up a tent outside whenever her group comes to visit. I respect a person who feels at home in the wild, forgoing the comforts and stresses of modern living in favor of a life in oneness with nature. And I’m especially impressed she hasn’t been claimed by the Forest. I just wish she wouldn’t ‘forage’ in my garden. At least she shares the meat from her hunting, but I bet it’s only because she thinks I’m a better cook than her…

Hidi Goldseeker/Hide ’n Seek

40lbs., 3’4, 33 y.o.

Deep Gnome LV 7 Thief Rogue LV 5 Champion Fighter

Str: 9, Dex: 20, Con: 16, Int: 12, Wis: 10, Cha: 12

HIDI IS A MEAN STINKY THIEF WHO STOLE MY FAVORITE SET OF SILVERWARE! THAT’S RIGHT, HIDI! I KNOW IT WAS YOU, AND I KNOW YOU’RE READING THIS! YOUR LITTLE GOODY GOODY ACT DOESN’T FOOL ME! I’M BUSTING OUT MY JUNIOR DETECTIVE KIT, AND AS SOON AS I HAVE EVIDENCE, I’M SENDING YOU TO THE SHADOW REALM!

[quinloki]

I've made a lot of progress in physical therapy. I can ride a bike again! Not for very long, but I can do it!

\o/ rock on! That’s fantastic!

Everything starts somewhere =3 and I’m glad you’re seeing progress \o/ the pandemic wore me down and I lost a lot of stamina and gained a lot of weight and I’m slowly getting my strength back.

I got to the top of the hill on my block a week ago and I had scold myself cause I was really bittersweet about it. Like I used to bench 150lbs and I’m celebrating half a block up a hill.

But that was loads better than I’d been for two years and it was GOOD.

And fuck yeah, you’re back on that bike and you’re gonna keep improving even if you have some set backs you’ll get there!! Keep it up \o/

Brag For Me

[yourfatpiggygf]

Hi everyone,

Ella, F19

Im the sorority girl who blew up 🥵

So I recently discovered I was a feedee through my humiliation kink. I wasn't very skinny but small enough to not be considered fat. I've always had strange eating habits but I've always played sports so I've never gotten past 160.

When i started school in September I was around 150lbs and I joined a sorority. I was really set on meeting cute guys and sororities tend to party a lot with other frats so it was super easy to meet people.

Needless to say, we drink a lot and my roommate has seen my 3am food binges after I drink and told me I would get fat if I kept eating this way.

It kind of made me blush a bit but I didn't think much of it and brushed her off. Welp, she was right. The first 20 pounds came within a month and a half and it was so quick that I couldn't really hide it. Was constantly bloated from the alcohol and the stress of school made me REALLY not wanna cook so I only ate out.

It was so embarrassing because it was obvious that my clothes were super tight on me and this cute guy I met even stopped talking to me.

2 months later I gained another 15 pounds so it was official, I went from a round bloated queen to actually chubby. My roommate even commented on it at some point and the few sisters from my sorority I'm actually friends with have told me that the other girls talk a lot about the weight I put on so quickly and the frat boys tease a guy I hooked up with when school started because of my "blow up." They are also kind of chubby, but at this point I had gotten cubbier than them.

That moment combined with my humiliation kink just sent me into overdrive. That night I made myself cum harder than I ever have and knew I was going to keep going.

When I got home for winter break I was a chubby 185 and when I got back to school I was another obvious 20 pounds bigger, bringing me up to 55 pounds gained from the end of August to December. So my family watched me leave skinny, come back fat, and then leave even fatter than I was when I got there..

When I got back to school there were actually a couple girls who asked if I was supposed to be at our sorority meeting. It turns out they didn't recognize me and even my student ID shows a much skinnier version of my face. At this point I had a double-chin, my boobs were stretching my shirt, and my pants definitely didn't look like they were meant to be sat in.

I ended up ballooning as the year went and by the time I left school in May I had gained another 40 pounds. Since then I've gained around 15 more pounds.

[jadevine]

Just adding some Medieval Horse tidbits because I love how people mentioned that realistic archery needs strength! Archers were so stacked that it affected their skeletons, and most modern people can tell if someone does archery depending on how great their back/shoulder muscles are.

As for a Long Post ahead, my rambling is going to be about Realistic Medieval Warhorses, and touching on Medieval Warfare!

--

First of all: DESTRIERS WERE NOT DRAFT HORSES. Horse/military historians are begging people to stop putting their fantasy knights on Shires, Belgians, and other massive, chunky farm-horses! The best known instance of "a knight needs to get lifted onto their 18-hand draft horse" is a SATIRE (A Yankee in King Arthur's Court, if I remember right), but somehow laymen decided to take it seriously.

Hell, I think the film's historians knew that this was extremely inaccurate and begged the director not to do it.

For the purposes of this post, I will not get into the different TYPES OF WARHORSES. That is a hyper-fixation for another day, lol.

--

First problem with "Draft horses as warhorses:"

The bulk of modern-day "breeds" are far too recent for a medieval or medieval-fantasy story. Modern horse "breeds" began around the 1700s-1800s, so that's in the EXTREMELY late-medieval/early-modern period. Before that, most medieval horses were referred to by "TYPE/PURPOSE" and maybe a "Country/Region." "Spanish/Iberian horses" (the ancestors of modern-day Andalusians, Carthusians, and Lusitanos) were overwhelmingly popular for combat, and other baroque horses were also esteemed.

Destriers are physically average-height at 15 hands high, but the important part is that they are STACKED at 1200-1300lbs when most 15-hand horses are only 900-1000lbs, so that's a quarter to a third more weight in muscle.

And remember, muscle will not make a given horse look "chubby!" Good ways to get across a warhorse's muscles in writing is 1) how ROCK SOLID they are when you touch them, 2) their chiseled shoulders, necks, and butts, and 2) when they get into motion, especially for a fight, their muscles will flex and get REALLY defined. The three regions I mentioned are usually the most visible if they've got horse tack or a rider on them.

Think of the difference between "regular horse" and "destrier" as "regular Tom Hardy, who looks fit but normal," versus "Tom Hardy playing Bane, where he put on thirty pounds and his torso and arms look like a fucking tree-trunk."

Warhorses had nerves of steel, and the best-trained warhorses used could sprint and turn on a dime--they've been called "the sports cars of the medieval world." This is a far cry from huge, sweet, and lumbering draft horses.

Besides Spanish horses, modern-day candidates for destriers would be European cobs (heavier all-purpose horses, large Welsh cobs are the best-known modern breed), and Foundation Quarter Horses (working/stock horses that can herd cattle and race and actually USE their muscles, not the bloated halter-horses who are mostly bred to look "good" to judges).

--

But if the destrier was supposed to be the horse equivalent of "Tom Hardy as Bane" and not "The Mountain from Game of Thrones," then how could they carry a knight's armor as well as their own?

First of all, human combat armor is different from JOUSTING armor and it is easily half the weight for better mobility. Warhorses from proper medieval times aren't shown wearing much horse-armor, even in jousting. The stuff you see in museums is also frequently the custom-made armor for wealthy nobles, who either 1) wore it once or twice a year for public celebrations, which is also why the armor's in pristine condition instead of dented and bloody like combat armor would be, or 2) wore it because they were rich enough to not want themselves OR their expensive horses to die too soon in combat.

Assuming that all destriers needed to carry 150lbs for an adult armored man, PLUS another 150lbs of the horse's riding tack and armor, is like people from the years 2500-3000 assuming that everyone with a "car" must have a Lamborghini or a Ferrari that takes up a lot of maintenance (if you want to keep it looking nice, at least) and can go 200 miles per hour.

So the vast majority of realistic warhorses/destriers didn't get much if any armor, because 1) horse-armor is for princes and dukes, not Count Whoever's third son or his nephew that he tossed out on adulthood with barely any money, and 2) horse-armor is going to weigh down your FAST and NIMBLE warhorse. (Remember: Knights wanted sports cars, not tanks!) Take a look at the horses and knights of the website called "Destrier!" Most horses there aren't notably tall, and they mostly wear head-armor and fancy but not heavy horse-tack like capes, instead of full barding.

Another reason average/short warhorses were preferred is for medieval safety issues: You wanted to mount your horse from the ground without help. The famous knight Jean Le Maingre was so dedicated to fighting that he could VAULT onto his horse in armor, without touching the stirrups. His instructions are, essentially, "put on your armor, find your horse, put your hands on the horse's back/saddle, and FUCKING JUMP."

Unless you're seven feet tall or a gymnast, you're not jumping onto an 18-hand draft horse.

So all those Red Dead Redemption animations where you get to alley-oop your way onto your loyal steed? POSSIBLE, IF YOU ARE CRAZY/ANGRY ENOUGH.

Quick note: In ancient Ireland, they refer to a "steed-leap" that nobles, warriors, and other "people rich enough to own RIDING horses" were trained to use--with the important distinction that Gaelic nobles often took pride in either using saddles without stirrups, or NOT USING SADDLES TO PUT ANY STIRRUPS ON. So the bulk of Gaelic Irish nobles could theoretically go Red Dead Redemption on your ass.

--

And the third reason most combat-ready warhorses didn't get armor is because infantry (the vast majority of most medieval armies) just had a low chance of hitting them in the first place.

First of all, most horses are already faster than people. Destriers were EXCEPTIONALLY fast as the cream of the crop. For the horse to need armor, someone needs a good chance of hitting the horse.

Second, most horses are hard to kill physically because horses don't tend to like getting stabbed or shot at, so they will likely try to kill YOU, which means that a knight and his horse are TWO fighters who are both very angry and very protective of each other. Most people love their horses, and many combatants share intense bonds! IMAGINE IF YOUR HORSE IS ALSO YOUR SQUAD-MATE!

And last of all, most horses are hard to kill mentally because when you want to use cavalry, you ALSO want the other side's infantry to get consumed by panic and bolt for their lives, away from their companions and AWAY FROM THE CHARGING HORSES. (Which routinely leads to a slaughter, often called a "rout" in period literature, or a "curb-stomp battle" on TV Tropes.) While most knights could dish out one-on-one duels against EACH OTHER, a knight against a foot-soldier is going to have a huge and explicitly unfair advantage if the soldier is not specifically trained and equipped to take them on.

See, when you get a herd of knights on their steeds, the noise and the wave of horseflesh charging at you is going to make your reptile-brain instincts scream "NOPE NOPE NOPE, WE GOTTA GO!!!"

That instinct is so strong that infantry ACTORS in movies--who know that this is not a real war, and the riders don't actually want to kill them--still routinely break formation and run.

It was possible to stop cavalry with infantry and end up slaughtering them instead of getting routed--it was just extremely notable.

Also, unless you're specifically going for blood: You don't WANT to slaughter a whole formation of knights! That means you've just pissed away a WHOLE lot of money that the knights represent!

You killed the horses that you could have used for your own side, and possibly bred for more high-end horses! You ruined the armor that you could have used for your own side, or at least melted down for high-quality, already-mined metal! You killed the knights that you could have sweetened up and used for your own side--or more likely, told their families to pay you if they wanted them home intact.

Barely anyone remembers that knights were as good for HOSTAGES as they were for actually fighting. (Except for Game of Thrones, and it's still only plot-relevant for Jaime Lannister and Theon Greyjoy, and they explicitly did NOT get the protection a noble hostage should have.) It's noted that Agincourt was a GREAT ending for England because capturing all those French nobles earned them TWENTY YEARS' WORTH of regular income in ransoms. If they hadn't won and gotten all that sweet, sweet French money, they would have been bankrupted and depopulated instead.

--

Two more strikes I'd feel are appropriate for "not wanting draft-type horses in combat:"

-Logistics 1: Too much food, too much hassle. Horses are already notorious for eating a lot, and a DRAFT horse that's 2000lbs instead of 1200lbs will eat twice as much. No army wants to use their fodder for only half the number of horses they'd expect.

-Logistics 2: Too much hair, too much hassle. Shires and other British horses often have feathering on their legs, and anyone with long hair knows that loose hair/fur is a fucking PAIN. You can braid a horse's mane and tail, but if you're one of the many average/poor knights who DON'T have servants to take care of your horse for you, do you want to spend extra time cleaning and combing out your horse's LEGS instead of necessary things? Like feeding them, grooming them, and checking for wounds? Nope, you'll probably shave the feathering off or just pick a horse that doesn't have it.

-Extra note on Friesian horses, who are RIDICULOUSLY common in "medieval" movies: Friesian horses are technically baroque horses in body form (Strong-boned! Big necks and butts!), but they're also over-used in general, so most horse folks are sick of seeing them in movies. And if you don't have the right kind of MODERN Friesian, you'll probably be a laughingstock in addition to an eye-roll.

Some strains of modern Friesians are from carriage-horse lines, often referred to as "big movers." This means "fun to LOOK AT, but terrible to RIDE." Because, you know, those strains of Friesians weren't meant for riding, but for PULLING CARRIAGES. Their movements are big, dramatic, and flashy... and their trot is notorious for bouncing people out of the saddle with every step. Not something you want for a knight who fills his opponents with terror.

A good riding horse's movements are usually smooth and low to the ground, often described as "floating" and "effortless."

--

A horse-note that I can't figure out where to put: Many Western cultures love the idea of fiery stallions (intact male horses) for their noble knights and kings to ride into battle on, but realistically, stallions are only half of a given horse population. Many Western stallions are also gelded if they're not the cream of the crop (which is probably at least the bottom half of the male horse population). So mares can be used by at least half of a realistic formation who just wants a warhorse, and doesn't care about aesthetics or masculinity.

Also, mares can be ruthless and stallions can be nervous wrecks! Horses are living creatures, with personalities and feelings!

Horses also aren't very sexually dimorphic, so a 1200lb war mare is DEFINITELY a match for a 1300lb war stallion. And remember how Loras Tyrell used a mare in heat to distract The Mountain's stallion? That happens with a lot of stallions... almost like they're living creatures, with instincts that they can't always control! So if you know when your girl is ready to go every month, you can play dirty in a joust, too!

Just remember that you're taking an equal risk, since your mare will possibly try to let a stallion mount her instead of fighting. You will either need to bail when she starts making googly-eyes, or you need to know you have ABSOLUTE loyalty from her, and she will listen to YOU instead of "the hot dude I just met five minutes ago!" HORSES ARE LIVING CREATURES, WITH INSTINCTS THAT THEY CAN'T ALWAYS CONTROL.

Then geldings will be used by at least another quarter of "the knights who cannot afford a horse good enough to keep his testicles," so that leaves "a quarter or less" of knights who can realistically be mounted on stallions.

WORSE NEWS: If you geld a stallion too late (usually once they're MOSTLY physically mature at 4-5 years old), that risk may never go away--so you've got a gelding who's not breeding quality, but he's still chasing mares in heat and fighting other stallions in turf battles, without understanding that he can no longer make babies!

On the other hand, some cultures don't geld stallions because they view it as unnecessary or outright unnatural... but they also don't want half the horse population distracted by pretty mares, or fighting with other stallions who walk by the pasture, so those cultures breed them to be sweet and easily managed (outside of battle, at least).

In short: ALL HORSES HAVE POTENTIAL TO BE WARHORSES, WHETHER THEY HAVE BALLS OR NOT.

Helpful things for action writers to remember

Sticking a landing will royally fuck up your joints and possibly shatter your ankles, depending on how high you’re jumping/falling from. There’s a very good reason free-runners dive and roll. 

Hand-to-hand fights usually only last a matter of seconds, sometimes a few minutes. It’s exhausting work and unless you have a lot of training and history with hand-to-hand combat, you’re going to tire out really fast. 

Arrows are very effective and you can’t just yank them out without doing a lot of damage. Most of the time the head of the arrow will break off inside the body if you try pulling it out, and arrows are built to pierce deep. An arrow wound demands medical attention. 

Throwing your opponent across the room is really not all that smart. You’re giving them the chance to get up and run away. Unless you’re trying to put distance between you so you can shoot them or something, don’t throw them. 

Everyone has something called a “flinch response” when they fight. This is pretty much the brain’s way of telling you “get the fuck out of here or we’re gonna die.” Experienced fighters have trained to suppress this. Think about how long your character has been fighting. A character in a fist fight for the first time is going to take a few hits before their survival instinct kicks in and they start hitting back. A character in a fist fight for the eighth time that week is going to respond a little differently. 

ADRENALINE WORKS AGAINST YOU WHEN YOU FIGHT. THIS IS IMPORTANT. A lot of times people think that adrenaline will kick in and give you some badass fighting skills, but it’s actually the opposite. Adrenaline is what tires you out in a battle and it also affects the fighter’s efficacy - meaning it makes them shaky and inaccurate, and overall they lose about 60% of their fighting skill because their brain is focusing on not dying. Adrenaline keeps you alive, it doesn’t give you the skill to pull off a perfect roundhouse kick to the opponent’s face. 

Swords WILL bend or break if you hit something hard enough. They also dull easily and take a lot of maintenance. In reality, someone who fights with a sword would have to have to repair or replace it constantly.

Fights get messy. There’s blood and sweat everywhere, and that will make it hard to hold your weapon or get a good grip on someone. 

A serious battle also smells horrible. There’s lots of sweat, but also the smell of urine and feces. After someone dies, their bowels and bladder empty. There might also be some questionable things on the ground which can be very psychologically traumatizing. Remember to think about all of the character’s senses when they’re in a fight. Everything WILL affect them in some way. 

If your sword is sharpened down to a fine edge, the rest of the blade can’t go through the cut you make. You’ll just end up putting a tiny, shallow scratch in the surface of whatever you strike, and you could probably break your sword. 

ARCHERS ARE STRONG TOO. Have you ever drawn a bow? It takes a lot of strength, especially when you’re shooting a bow with a higher draw weight. Draw weight basically means “the amount of force you have to use to pull this sucker back enough to fire it.” To give you an idea of how that works, here’s a helpful link to tell you about finding bow sizes and draw weights for your characters.  (CLICK ME)

If an archer has to use a bow they’re not used to, it will probably throw them off a little until they’ve done a few practice shots with it and figured out its draw weight and stability. 

People bleed. If they get punched in the face, they’ll probably get a bloody nose. If they get stabbed or cut somehow, they’ll bleed accordingly. And if they’ve been fighting for a while, they’ve got a LOT of blood rushing around to provide them with oxygen. They’re going to bleed a lot. 

Here’s a link to a chart to show you how much blood a person can lose without dying. (CLICK ME) 

If you want a more in-depth medical chart, try this one. (CLICK ME)

Hopefully this helps someone out there. If you reblog, feel free to add more tips for writers or correct anything I’ve gotten wrong here. 

[littlestickyceilingslstars]

I've gained 50+ pounds from a mix of stress and medication over the past year and a half.

I feel so defeated right now, I spent so long working myself to loose the fat so I could feel better and I had finally made it back down to 150lbs and it all feels worthless right now.

I was so close to feeling completely in my body and feeling pretty, the dysphoria was better, I wanted to be in photos again. But I just got photos back from my school, and I feel so ugly. I tried so hard, I even had a good time with the photographer, but how I look just sours the fun of it.

Everything I try doesn't work anymore, I've tried to eat healthy, I've tried to exercise more and I'm just not budging and I hate it so much. I just want to feel that progress again.

I have a trip coming up, and I dont mentally want to go anymore. I know that theres gonna be pictures happening, and I want photos but I feel so fat and ugly compared to everyone else going.

[banneriscarried]

Okay but let’s really think about this here because this is something that’s worth obsessing over.

So Steve absolutely would’ve gotten a hell of a lot of vocal training during the early days of his Captain America USO Tour. It definitely wouldn’t mask his accent all the way, but it definitely would’ve softened it a lot, and it probably would’ve been enough to beat the habit of using that accent into him.

When he’s in Captain America mode, he uses that damn transatlantic accent he was taught, even if it feels unnatural in his mouth.

So when he goes to rescue Bucky and the rest of the prisoners from HYDRA, he’d probably still be in the mindset necessitating the usage of that accent. He was initially there for tours, after all, and Captain America has always been more of a character to play rather than a person that he is. To be honest, it would probably just be so engrained that he doesn’t even think about it. It’s just how he talks now.

And now let’s take a moment to appreciate the fact that this would probably be at least one of the top five weirdest changes Bucky sees in Steve. Like, yeah, his friend is now 6’2” despite being 5’4” the last he saw him, and yeah he put on 150lbs of height and muscle, and sure he’s now inhumanly strong and fast and has a near perfect memory, but he’s still Steve. He’s still got the same face, same hair, same big mouth.

But when he opens that big mouth? That would probably be the most surreal moment for Bucky, who’s never heard anything other than a hardcore brooklyn accent from him, one with extra Irish influence. Steve probably would’ve had an even stronger brooklyn accent than Bucky to begin with.

At first it doesn’t strike him as odd, at least not consciously, because he was just strapped to a table and probably has only half a clue as to what’s going on. He’s on the “this might as well happen” train and just focusing on keeping Steve from being a self sacrificing idiot and putting on foot in front of the other. Then there isn’t exactly much time for chatting on the march back to base, and Steve would probably actually be all over the place for most of the trek, trying to help out wherever he’s needed and making sure that the group is as safe as possible.

But during their first bit of relative downtime?

Steve opens his mouth once, probably doesn’t get much further than “Hey, Bucky” before the alarm bells that had been ringing in Bucky’s head that his brain couldn’t immediately spare the thought to acknowledge are blaring. His voice sounds the same, but the way he says everything is completely wrong, completely not Steve.

He’d probably say as much, blurting out a “what the fuck happened to your words”, rather than voice, because again, it’s the what he’s saying that sounds different, not his actual voice. He still sounds like Steve, he just doesn’t talk like him.

Steve would probably explain the vocal training he was given for the USO tours, they’d probably leave it at that, and out of habit Steve would probably use his New Accent most of the time. To be fair, he’s also acting as Captain America most of the time, even around the commandos.

But get him relaxed and happy enough? The accent comes out full force, and anyone outside of Bucky immediately has a hard time understanding him if they’re not paying close attention.

That’s all well and good, his best Transatlantic Accent comes in handy during meetings, making sure he’s clearly understood by everyone, he’s still got his brooklyn roots, and he doesn’t always sound weirdly off to Bucky’s ears.

Flash forward 70 years, the Avengers are now in the game, Cap is their leader, and he’s only ever in Captain America mode. The other Avengers genuinely would’ve only heard his transatlantic accent, because even when he’s relaxed and comfortable with them, he’s still pretty firmly in Cap mode. Maybe his accent slips towards the north east sometimes when he’s having a particularly good time, and he’d probably be teased during those instances (light hearted, no malicious intent), mostly by Tony.

But imagine, if you will, a happier universe, one where Bucky ends up being an Avenger or at least goes through his recovery with Steve at his side.

The first time any of the other Avengers actually hear Steve speaking like Steve Rogers, the foul-mouthed, brooklynite that grew up in a rough neighbourhood and whose best friend (boyfriend) worked at the dock yard while he was off getting into back alley scrap fights, instead of Captain America, the polite and well mannered, if incredibly stubborn, patriotic icon, their sense of reality immediately implodes.

Because let’s not forget, a lot of accents in America have softened a lot over the years. Migration, changes in popular vocabulary, and classism all have had massive effects on local dialects and accents. So what’s considered a strong brooklyn accent now, probably would’ve been considered normal way back when. And Steve? Steve had a strong brooklyn accent, even if it has been tapered by the years of using just his transatlantic one.

Maybe it happens because Steve is genuinely able to relax in that specific way that lets him speak and act as just himself when he’s around Bucky, maybe he makes an effort to talk how he used to around Bucky to try and help him feel more comfortable around Steve, or to try to help jog his memories. Maybe Bucky makes a comment about how Steve sounds weird in a way he can’t quite pinpoint but just strikes him as off (he knew Steve for two decades, and almost all of that time would’ve been accompanied by Steve’s strong brooklyn accent (it’d be as engrained in Bucky’s mind as his blue eyes, bloody noses, and bruised face, something present even when he can’t remember or think why that would be the case)), so Steve makes the effort when it’s just them.

Tony immediately reacts like someone just used an incredibly filthy and insulting word to describe his mother and needs a moment to process before he can get mad.

Clint drops whatever he’s holding and stares, feeling weirded out but is probably also getting a lot of joy out of this.

Bruce is more uncertain than anything else, still processing the fact that what he just heard did, in fact, come out of Steve’s mouth, and trying to reconcile that fact with the guy he knows.

Nat has no outward reaction, she objectively knew that Steve would’ve had a very strong brooklyn accent once upon a time ago, and that he would’ve sworn like a damn sailor before the nation looked up to him as the peak of moral righteousness. She was probably one of the people who had gotten closest to hearing Steve cut loose and talk like Steve Rogers rather than Captain America. But still, that same feeling of wrongness Bucky once felt at hearing a stranger’s inflection coming out of his best friend’s mouth is something that not even Natasha can completely ignore.

Sam’s the least surprised, and probably recovers from the shock first, asking if Steve kissed his mother with that mouth before moving on.

After that, Bucky probably makes a game out of getting Steve to talk like himself around others, rather than just being Captain America all the time. Riling him up in just the right ways at the right times around others that Steve can’t help but snap back like he’s all of 5’4” and 95lbs, ready to fight god and win.

Does he do it because he gets a kick out of it? Yes, obviously. But, does he think it’s also a necessary step for Steve to embark on his own journey of recovery, his own path to regaining personhood? Absolutely.

And I’m gonna leave this here because otherwise I’ll be writing for hours.

Friendly reminder that Steve and Bucky probably have absolutely wild Brooklyn accents. Maybe it’s mellowed out over the years but sometimes, woild, goil, woist, poifume. Cwafee. Wourder. Fugeddaboutit.

[nooneandeveryone]

I talked about this on discord a bit.

I really didn't realize how much two events shaped me until last night.

The first event happened before I was born. My mom was in college, she was kidnapped at gun point. She was able to get out of the situation by lying her ass off. She straight up manipulated the guy into letting her go. She told me a heavily edited version of the story when I was a kid to explain lying is allowed if you're in danger. I left out a lot just now too. The important bit is she survived.

The second event happened when I was about 11 or 12. Pretty sure I was 12. We lived out in the country with a quarter of a mile (that's just under a kilometer) long driveway. I got dropped off by the bus at the end of it and would walk up it.

One day, a car shadowed me. Slowly drove up the driveway. I was half way up it. All the alarm bells went off. I kept going, pretending I didn't notice. While drifting into the center of the driveway to block the path. They yelled out to me. Asking the kind of questions you don't ask a child. Is that car for sale? Is someone home?

I lied about everything and did not get close to their car. Then I sprinted off to the house and immediately let my 150lb dog loose. Sirius, the half malamute who hated strange men and racoons. He stood on the porch and did his moo-like growl at the car.

The car backed out of the driveway and I called my mom at work.

The truth was, I was home alone aside from two dogs and a bunch of cats.

I spent the rest of the afternoon with the dogs. Sirius and Ghost. Ghost was a blind Weimaraner who looked super scary because of cataracts.

I don't think it was a coincidence my dad taught me gun safety and how to shoot that same year. Also how to drive. I would also go to his house, which was closer to the school, instead of my mom's.

I would practice hiding. I kept my softball bat ready. I built this little platform in the tree by the front door. I could see the entire driveway and two main roads. I would go up there if I felt anxious. I would wander in the woods behind the house either with Sirius or a small train of cats.

I accidentally snuck up on a deer and we scared the shit out of each other. Like I got two feet away before we saw each other.

The somewhat funny thing is... I don't get PTSD from that incident anymore.

But you know what still gives me PTSD?? Kindergarten. That fucking bitch of a teacher. I hope she rots in hell. And may every god ever bless the ADA for saving me.

[dedmar]

All I wanna do is talk about Leonidas all day but I have to be a normal person >:(

-Physically in his late 30s (37-ish?) but I keep bumping this back— he could be pushing 40s honestly. Actually 255 and doesn’t age. -really smart but also very very ditzy

-has Raynaud’s and Marfan Syndrome (lips/toes/fingers are cold/turn blue easily d/t genetics and connective tissue disorder that causes ppl to be really tall)

-with his 2 ahoge he’s 6’7”, without he’s 6’4” , weighs maybe 145-150lbs

-fucking loves sugary coffee and desserts

-technically has a doctorate in medicine but it’s from 1880-something so ???

-mentally stuck in the 60s-70s. Considers it the best era for fashion/music—but not for food. He prefers modern food (especially junk food)

-bi/pan but too dense to realize ppl wanna fuck him

-charisma powerhouse and very outgoing but also an introvert that gets exhausted from socializing and needs a lot of time to recover

-the overt charisma is probably a cover-up for his insecurity

-is the more responsible one (but that’s not saying a ton…)

-very much a stoner in the 60s-70s, stopped as he grew more detached from the world and became more introverted. Still has plants he tends to tho. Will smoke with Ruby occasionally.

-Very well meaning and has a good heart but finds his exuberance and obsessiveness over details often hinders goals and makes things worse

-also very much a caregiver, but again struggles with overdoing things and complicating them.

-perky and positive!!! Except when something goes wrong, then he wears his heart on his sleeve and cries. A lot. Rarely ever shows anger or frustration (it usually bubbles over into tears anyways)

-experiments on himself. Of course. He’s gotta know why he’s living so fucking long and not aging. -his favorite color is yellow

-his favorite song is “love the one you’re with” by the Isley Brothers

-probably was present at the first sci-fi/comic conventions

-read every single one of the Star Wars extended universe books plus any pulpy sci-fi books he got his hands on

-fine at cooking, better at gardening than you’d expect

-hates having his head touched but likes having his hair short, so 99% of the time his hair is this awkward shaggy cut with 2 cowlicks poking out where he either half cut it and gave up, or he’s overdue for another cut and putting it off. Sometimes puts it up in a low ponytail or clip

-big time cuddler. Starved for affection (like 200 years starved).

-overfunctioner that overthinks for other peoples’ sake, even to his own detriment or it becomes illogical (ie “oh I think I’m in love with him but if I tell him he’ll feel obligated to reciprocate and I don’t want to put that on him, he’s already been through a lot. I won’t say anything and wait for him to approach me, and if anything just be a good friend!!! *cries*” or “If I help her with her groceries she’ll feel the need to thank me or compensate me in some way and I don’t want to make her uncomfortable. Besides, I don’t want her to think I don’t think she’s capable!”)

-loves with his whole heart and honestly probably lets people in too easily. He gets hurt a lot :(

I’m in love with him your honor he’s everything to me he was my best friend when I was a lonely kid and he’s still my bby man!!!!

ok thanks bye!!!!

[deadandgaysetanta]

Setanta Wintertide

Okay so I've decided to finally make a post dedicated to my OC/dnd character Setanta. I did not name myself after him, I just named him after me. Because why not.

Setanta is 23 years old, 5'10, and roughly 150lbs. He is a satyr. (technically a faun, because he is half deer instead of half goat). He's a bard. He plays many instruments, but mainly the guitar, mandolin, lute, pan flute, and violin. He carries two hooked swords (sickles, technically) which he dual-wields during hand-to-hand combat. As a bard he is a spellcaster, and his specialty is "bitch booms." Spells such as vicious mockery, earth tremor, shatter, thunderclap, and thunderwave. (he calls them bitch booms because they go boom). (vicious mockery is the odd one out there, but its on the list because he uses the spell and shouts "BITCH" and it does damage). He's pansexual and they/he. He bangs so many people it's honestly not even funny anymore. Here's some pictures of him:

He's my boy and I love him deerly. (heh see what i did there? cuz hes a deer?)