#0/10 would def do it all over again next year

[kaontic]

Win-win situation?

[descendantofthesparrow]

Welcome back to the “the d3 outfits don't fit the characters age” side posts; this version? Evie

small review, last time me n @darkprinceofdarkness​ said the outfits of D3 fit the actors and not the characters and Mal dresses like a 40 year old white woman.

MOVING ON

we gon do this in order this time, so to start!

gttb....i gotta be honest, i do like this, its blue, its loose, it has a fun skirt, it has accents of red instead of it taking over her main color, tiny crown, fab velvet heels. pretty solid Evie outfit. i think the only complaint i have with it is her hair? like, where's ur braids? where's the Evie braid? i loved that shit, she has her curls but they are only at the bottom and i miss when they started like a half inch off her scalp, give Evie back her curls 2k21 9/10 i want her curls and braids. wouldn't wear but its cute

VK pick up day....okay i also like this one, it still feels Evie to me, fun skirt, fun jacket, leggings, cute boots, just change out her necklace for a smaller charm one (possibly the one from D1 that she wore all the time), and curl her hair, maybe braid her bangs or twist them back to pin them to the back of her head. 9/10 change hair and necklace but def would wear.

at some point between designing these last two outfits, someone fucked up and decided Evie was a 40 year old relator who watches gaudy fashion shows.

i hate it i hate it i hate it i hate it i hate it i hate it, what the fuck is she wearing, i hate it so much, Evie you are 19 not 40. i have NEVER liked this outfit on her, it hasn't grown on me one bit, nada, no hate it, burn it. the top could be cute but the paired it with the worst pants ever, she looks like a fucking pta mom who needs to go pic up her kids from soccer practice, what the fuck who did this to you bby. the only thing good about this look is the shoes, and her hair, her hair is pinned back a bit and curled at the end, its the only good thing, the gloves are okay but again, the whole outfit ruins the good shit. pair the shirt and the other good stuff with either skinny jeans or a loose skirt and then maybe- MAYBE it'll look good. why the fuck was she even wearing this?? it looks like they maybe planned for Evie to join in on the meeting then took her out last minute and decided Sofia should still wear the outfit for the next scene?? this is the same day as Janes party right?? just put her in the blue romper?! it would make sense?!  0/10 get it the fuck away from me and burn it.

then someone turned their brain back on and gave Evie this cute ruffle romper for Sofia to wear, its simple, but i like that it is, the core four party outfits are simple anyway and its fine since they are going to a forest and they do need free moving outfits to get around easier, so its nice, its flowy, its got ruffles in cute places, and this does feel like something a 19 year old would wear, it also feels like something a 40 year old would wear but that's fine, it doesn't feel like Evie is dressing 20 years older than her. cute outfit, cute boots, red gloves and basic Evie accessories. 8/10 wouldn't wear but it suits Evie 

and now....gug

the motor cross gear...after the success of the romper, they once again took a dive and just...yuck. Blue is Evies main color, RED IS HER ACCENT COLOR do NOT overwhelm her outfit with red!!!!! the color blocks are in odd places and ruin the pacing of the outfit. i hate the jacket, i hate the skirt, i hate the pants, the boots are like, the ONLY good thing on this damn outfit. that and her tiara. thats it, thats all i like about it. whenever this damn thing comes on screen i have a physical reaction, i hate it, i hate it so much. it has not grown on me on bit. i would probably like it more with they switched the red with Blue and then it would feel more Evie to me, because RED IS HARRYS COLOR (red is also an accent color for colors, his main is black&white) oh and funfact! i was looking at the motorpunk concept art and inspiration stuff, Kara kept using inspo from looks that were fitting for people over 30 n shit, that's why that feels so old, because there was no younger styled motosport stuff. so the Motorpunk gear isnt even inspired by a younger gens style! its all 30+ inspo of older people wearing it and its just AH!!! like COME ON!! its not that hard to take inspo from younger gen style! hell! they could have gone with biker punk! it would have fit the C4 more! biker punk is leather, spikes, denim, loose-tight pants, boots, fingerless gloves BASICALLY THE VKS MAIN STYLE LIKE IT WAS RIGHT THERE!!!!  3/10 it had potential but they lost it and ruined it.

Break this down/engagement party...i don't know why, but i don't like it, i think its the TWO GIANT FUCKING BOWS. they look so out of place and distract from the entire outfit, make the bottom one smaller and slimmer with a looser fabric, and just remove the top one completely and BOOM its actually a good dress. shoes are fine, i hate her gloves, her necklace is lowkey ugly, and curl her fucking hair properly (aka from her scalp and not the last couple inches of her hair). 5/10 it had potential and they added bows...bows are always a downfall if you don't know what ur fucking doing with them. 

there we go Evie’s outfits rant.

again, i will say Kara Saun is a good designer, but she wasn't the best fit for a series about TEENAGERS. 

[samwrights]

Aoba Johsai 3rd Years as dads [hc]

Lmao, as if I was gonna stop at Karasuno. I’m a Seijoh hoe through and through 😂😂😂 this ones a little off the rails but it’s my blog and I write what I want. I’ll get to the rest of Seijoh later, maybe, but these turned out way longer than I anticipated.

Slight TW; mentions of miscarriage.

Iwaizumi;

I love this supportive man so much 🥺

I don’t even want kids and I’d let him turn me into a baby factory, idgaf.

Ahem, n e ways.

Low key, he would be freaking out over your guys’ first kid. Didn’t matter that you were in live-in S/O’s, or that you’d been together for y e a r s.

Homie wanted to marry you first, finally get you guys out of your shoddy apartment, maybe spend a few years traveling the world.

He wanted to live the life of a dink, at least for a little while before eventually starting a family with you. Apparently someone’s pullout game weak af.

Despite not being prepared for parenthood, your pregnancy actually goes pretty swimmingly. Iwa would def be the man to come with to all doctors appointments, parenting classes, and would literally call his mom every three seconds freaking out because he has no idea what color to paint the nursery.

“Mom, I can’t just paint it whatever, what if the baby doesn’t like it?” Don’t ask me why, I just know it would be a fact.

Throughout your relationship as teenagers, Iwa was always your hype-man cause he loves flaunting his woman at whatever she chooses to succeed at. Which made Oikawa hella jealous but irrelevant. Now that you guys were going to be a family, it was like falling in love with you all over again and he literally hyped you up everyday with how great of a mom you were going to be.

Endless comments on how beautiful you looked while pregnant, regarding your glow or how he gets so overwhelmed with love knowing that you are having his child. Fucking simp.

If you feel he’s laying it on too thick, you tell him it’s actually Mattsun’s and Iwa is just a cover so you can run off with him and Makki. 0/10, does not appreciate.

The closer you get to your due date, however, all jokes are completely off, and Hajime is in full on protective husband/dad mode. Did I mention y’all still ain’t married or

He does literally everything for you just to make sure you aren’t in too much pain or discomfort. Mfer won’t even let you pick up a laundry basket 💀

“Honey, I’m fine! Please, I can’t sit on the couch all day, there’s going to be a permanent imprint from my ass on it.”

“Baby, why is the couch wet?”

“Huh. Guess my water broke.”

Annnnnnd cue Hajime screaming his head off while proceeding to grab your hospital bag packed with clothes, a spare aux cable, and your toiletries, before rushing out to the car, starting it, and driving to the hospital.

Without you.

With that being his only major faux pas, Iwaizumi welcomes fatherhood with open arms. Sure, y’all didn’t have your house yet and a wedding was going to be difficult to plan (though if you’re down for the courthouse, he was in), and he didn’t have enough saved to buy you a ring that screamed “Mrs. Iwaizumi” to him.

But in the mean time, he could not get enough of his girls. Even little things like feeding your daughter or watching tv with her in his arms with you snuggling up to his side made him the absolute softest boy.

It may not have been his ideal situation in the past, but now all he looked forward to was watching your family continue to grow with a few more hopeful additions.

Oikawa;

Well this is awkward. You and Tooru I mean Oikawa broke up a few months ago. Not that it was a particularly bad break up; definitely more on the mutual side.

You wanted to continue pursuing your dreams and he wanted to carry on being a Pro. (Personally, I picture Oikawa being with a musician of some sort that posts covers of YouTube).

So even though you guys aren’t together anymore, you still keep up with how he’s doing in the pro VB world and he low key still watches your covers on the internet.

Your posting becomes less and less frequent, he notices over the span of a few months until you stop uploading all together. He thinks nothing of it until he gets a notification that you’ve finally uploaded a video. Two. Years. Later.

“Where we’ve been.” He doesn’t miss the collective pronoun before clicking on the video, seeing you standing with your guitarist, the former Nekoma VBC captain, Tetsurou Kuroo, as well as a cute, pudgy baby.

A baby that looked nothing like Kuroo and a whole lot like Oikawa did when he was a baby.

The video talks about your hiatus, as well as how you and your now boyfriend/guitarist were enjoying your life as parents and making music was hard with your little boy, and that the two of you needed to prioritize your son first. you introduce your baby, but the first thing Oikawa discovers is that the age of your baby and the duration of yours and Kuroo’s relationship didn’t add up. Don’t ask me why Oikawa knows how long you’ve been together, he has his resources.

Considering the toddler was two, and you and Kuroo had been together for a year. And the baby didn’t look anything like you OR him

Oikawa is flipping out now, and tries everything in his power to get a hold of you. Which oddly enough, wasn’t that hard considering your number is still the same.

“Did you finally figure it out?” Was all you said to him. He’s so upset that you didn’t tell him—that could have been him. Standing with you. Holding his baby—not bed headed fuck holding HIS son.

After FTing him, you, Oikawa, and Kuroo agreed to set up a meeting with all of you so Oikawa could finally meet his flesh and blood. He’s excited, but man oh man is he salty.

He missed his son’s first steps, first meal, holding him, teaching him how to walk, his first words; he missed ALL of it.

But the bitterness he feels completely goes away when he sees baby Oik’s in person for the first time. He had never, in his entire twenty three years of living, been in love until now. Despite your hesitation, you allow Tooru to hold his child for the entirety of your little meeting, allowing him to make up for lost years.

The three of you agreed on a form of joint custody that allowed Oikawa to have his son while you toured or were busy working, and you would have him while he was out doing his thing.

TL;DR, Oikawa takes the opportunity to make up his lost years spoiling the fuck out of his baby when he can and, oddly enough, the arrangement works out to benefit the both of you.

Ngl, parenthood is hard for him. Not because he doesn’t know how to parent, but rather because he never pictured his first child to come about this way. He would never admit it to anybody, not even Iwa, that knowing he had a child that he was barely a father to left him feeling lonely. That loneliness, however, motivates him to truly be the best dad that can be so that maybe when his son his old enough, he would rather live with him instead of his mom

Ofc, he teaches his offspring how to play volleyball as soon as he’s old enough to learn. But outside of that, Oikawa’s favorite thing to do with his son is little quiet nature walks away from the bustling city to have quality time with him.

Hanamaki;

This chill mfer 💀💀💀 for some reason, I feel like his love language is touch.

Your relationship with him was so simple, even after moving in together in your second year of college, years ago.

Well, it was simple.

As simple as life could be with four demons overrunning your house.

Due to the number of children the two of you had, with all of them being no more than two years apart in age, you became a stay-at-home mom, leaving Makki to provide for the six of you.

Because of your hellions wreaking havoc on you all day, Takahiro always wound down from work with the kids by putting on a movie and even reciting the script in his own voice to keep them entertained. Allowing you to go wind down with a glass of wine while you took a bubble bath.

Your oldest was Makki’s right hand man at the ripe age of 7. He always made sure that, as the big brother, he was looking out for his siblings and being the man of the house to help mommy while he worked.

Makki never raises his voice at the kids. Ever. Period.

If he’s upset with them or they did something they weren’t supposed to, he resolves the issue by picking them up, sitting down on the couch with them in his lap and staring at them. “Why did you draw on the walls with crayon, little man?” He would ask the offending five year old boy in the most calm voice.

“I wanted to paint a pretty picture for you and mommy!”

“And we love it. But next time, dude, if you put it on paper, I can bring those pictures to work so I can show everyone else.” Yeah, he calls his sons dude.

If his youngest and only daughter began crying over anything—Makki was on it like flies on shit. Little princess is not allowed to cry in daddy’s presence. He’s always quick to figure out why she’s crying too and, he learned, it’s mostly just because she wanted attention.

“When did you get so good at this?” You’d tease him.

“We’ve had lots of practice, honey.” 💀💀💀

A lot of the time, he felt really bad because he felt that he just kinda left you with the kids while he worked, and he’d be a little insecure. He thinks you’re tired of him and that you want to leave sometimes.

He thinks you don’t notice when he’s upset but he kinda dumb dumb cause you’ve been together for almost half of your lives, ofc you know when he’s upset.

While he’s laying in bed, nonchalantly scrolling through his phone before falling asleep for the night, you sit at his bedside, giving him the look. “C’mon, Takahiro. I can tell when something’s bothering you.” His lips would purse a little bit before locking his phone and putting it on his night stand, then holding whatever hand of yours that was closest to him with both of his.

“Ya ever just...get tired of our life?” Aksfnrjfl WOW THAT CAME OUT WRONG. This is why he prefers touch, he’s shit with words. “Wait no, that’s not what I meant. D-do, uh...a-are you happy?” Wow he really shit with words. Even if this would be conversation y’all would have at least once a year.

But no matter how many times you told him you loved him, he needed to feel it. Why do you think you ended up pregnant nearly every year? “I’m getting my fucking tubes tied after this, Makki.”

Matsukawa;

This goof would be your partner in crime second to Makki of course.

Half the time people kinda forgot you were dating let alone married because the two of you had always been playful and full of laughter; the only change was PDA was sprinkled in.

Sitting in his lap, little pecks during conversations, burying yourself in his neck or him burying himself in your hair, a hand always on your back or your shoulder.

Homies super subtle touchy.

The biggest reminder was when you’d announced your pregnancy to your friends. While Makki was super excited to be an uncle, Oikawa and Iwa were kinda like “y’all actually have sex??” Like you weren’t fucking married??

But whatever, y’all goofy and in love or w/e and it almost seems that the two of you aren’t taking pregnancy seriously. You totally are, but your friends don’t think so.

Coming up with baby names was Issei’s favorite pastime. But he went super left field with a lot of them, so you unfortunately had to veto them.

Painting and preparing the nursery was also an absolute blast. Because you both wanted the gender to be a surprise, y’all painted the room white on top with a full rainbow on the bottom, complete with gender neutral wall decals.

Honestly, he was so so so excited to be a dad. But mostly, he was just so smitten with you. It wasn’t hard for him to, considering the two of you were best friends long before dating.

He definitely turned your ultrasound pictures into memes that he hung in the babies room. “The last time I got pussy” captioned under the first ultrasound was his favorite.

You woke up one day in excruciating amounts of pain—like someone was carving out the muscles in your stomach and separating them from the skin from the inside and you knew something was wrong. “Issei, we gotta go to the hospital now!”

“N-now?” All jokes are gone, all laughter void and absent. “Honey, you’re only at the end of the first trime—“

“I know, idiot! We gotta go now!” You’re sobbing while hunching over your stomach, trying to walk but not succeeding in getting very far. Instead, your husband opts to carry you out to the car before zipping on over.

The sudden appointment had taken hours and the both of you felt drained. Well, you actually were. All of the pain you had experienced earlier in the day did not compare to the devastating blow of hearing that you had a miscarriage.

Silence fills every space that the two of you were in but, knowing you as well as he did, Mattsun refused to leave your side. Even if you had to pee.

“Babe, I have to pee.”

“Cool, which bathroom do we wanna use?” He wasn’t making jokes for the sake of being funny, which was the reason you allowed him to sit on the edge of the tub while you handled your business, holding your fingers in loose threads. It’s weird, but this was not a time for either of you to be alone to indulge your demons.

“We’re gonna get through this.” His arms would wrap around you from behind, carefully folding over your once filled womb, with his head resting on top of your own. “Just you and me, babe, against the world.”

“And Makki.”

“And Makki.”

[evolsinner]

⊱┊7

with the moment past {definitely not mentally}, i make my way to the lounge.

“hey, rosé?”

i see him seated on a 3 seat sofa.

a, i hope he didn’t see the way i shaved my hair down there into a love heart... b, he def saw my boobies!!

“y~yes, mr killian?”

“you hungry or something? i can order you some pizza.”

hell, i’m famished, can’t remember the last time i ate.

“no, aha…”

“you sure?”

“actually, yeah, i am, a little... sorry if that’s an inconvenience.”

“no, not at all! don’t be silly. i’m starving.”

i restrict a smile.

“here,” he shifts to the side, patting the middle seat, “make yourself comfortable. i’ll order some now.”

i place his hoody on the armrest and sit on the other end instead; don’t have it in me to sit right next to him. we would be like idk touching and whatnot. amongst the remote and his wallet, he grabs his phone from the middle seat, dialling a number.

“pineapple on pizza?” he faces me, holding the phone to his ear.

i fucking love pineapple on pizza.

“100%,” i reply confidently.

he grins.

i have just found my soulmate.

i admire how laid back he looks: his white untucked dress shirt, sleeves rolled up to reveal thick veins and a dark tan, tie tossed on the table. is this how every male teacher looks after work?

‘cause, yummy!

“takeaway. one large vegetarian and one large hawaiian...with extra pineapple, please,” sir glances at me adorably. “cheers, sweetheart,” he hangs up after giving his number and address for the order. “should be here in 40 mins,” he informs me, “catch,” and tosses the remote at me. “pick a movie. make it a good one. i’m gonna go freshen up quickly.”

can i come?

-ˋˏ ༻🍷༺ ˎˊ-

i struggle to find a goddamn movie!

sir’s phone vibrates and i look across at it. why does that thing be buzzing and ringing all the time? i mean... hmm… i lean all the way back, peeping down the hallway. i listen to see if the shower is still on.

🚿pshhshhshhshhshhshh

oh good, it’s still on. i sneakily pick up his orange google pixel 4 xl mobile phone. okay, let’s see, what’s his passcode? says his pin contains at least four digits. hmm...

1 2 3 4

incorrect pin entered

4 3 2 1

incorrect pin entered

6 9 6 9

incorrect pin entered

his birth year, maybe?

1 9 8 1

incorrect pin entered

it’s definitely mine, then.

2 0 0 0

try again in 30 seconds

fuck, what is it?!

now i’m adamant.

a while later, i listen for the shower again. no sound. fuck me! i also haven’t even picked a movie yet! i grasp the remote and quickly flip through the movies. in ‘newly added’ a film that goes by the name ‘barefoot’ {2014} appears. this’ll do. i haphazardly click on it, put his phone back in the middle seat and swiftly bring my knees up on the sofa.

bathroom door opens and mr killian returns, setting himself down.

and ohhhh boy, oh jesus h. christ, he is wearing grey sweatpants. grey. sweatpants. oh my goddddddd!!!!

🎵dun da daaaaa! dunda dunda da dun dadada oo oo oooooo dun da da

i cringe, really should have skipped the first 10 mins or something.

sir looks at me with an amused expression, “just started?”

i nod, embarrassed.

then he cracks up a little, “how long did it take for you to pick a film?”

“i paused it, was waiting for you.”

“yeah?”

“yeah.”

“alrighty then,” he slumps down, letting me get away with the white lie. “this better be good or else you’re held accountable.”

the professional teacher’s vibe is disappearing and transforming into a perky one.

he’s wearing a loose t~shirt with long sleeves and it’s even rolled up. his hair is damp and floppy, making him so much more attractive. he runs his hands through it, flipping it back as the stray droplets of water roll down his neck. i would gladly lick them off for him if he doesn’t mind...

“why’s my phone locked for 60 minutes?”

“huh?” i snap out of my daydream.

“my phone, why’s it locked?”

*ding dong.*

“maybe...you put the wrong password in?”

“pretty sure i didn’t, and you’re the only other person in this house, no?”

*ding dong!*

“aha..ha,” i giggle nervously.

“does it look like i’m laughing?” he asks me condescendingly.

my smile disappears.

*ding dong! ding dong! ding dong! ding dong!*

“ight, i’m coming!!” sir shouts, grabbing his wallet. “..jesus christ, break my damn doorbell, will you..” he mutters under his breath angrily.

bit hot...

-ˋˏ ༻🍷༺ ˎˊ-

i only ate 2 slices of pizza so i wouldn’t look like a fat bitch in front of sir. he, however, didn’t even eat any. so much for being ‘starving’. he was just casually watching me eat. i could feel his eyes on me each time i took a bite and the odd olive or pineapple went rolling down into my lap. it was so awkward!

we’re halfway through the movie and i felt the need to say something because jay, the character, was such a jerk.

“i mean, it’s actually rather heartbreaking. daisy was locked away for most of, if not, her whole life. and now she is finally free, finally able to experience the pleasures of the real world. she put all of her trust in him and he abandoned her. that’s so not cool.”

as i’m analysing the film, i feel his eyes analysing me.

“well, you can’t blame him,” sir counterattacks. “jay had his own life, his own problems to deal with. she was just another added problem to that.”

“then he should’ve led her back to the hospital again instead of taking her on this joyride purely for his own greed.”

“remember, she chose to take part.”

“he was being selfish.”

“he was lending her a hand.”

“which is what ultimately made her fall in love with him in the first place,” i state like a full stop.

sir’s whole face just speaks wow. “so why didn’t you do my analysis homework then, huh?”

“because it’s boring,” i look him boldly in the eyes, his slicked back hair has me feelin’ oozy and woozy.

“oh, it’s boring?” he emphasises, raising his eyebrows. “is that so?”

“yup,” i purse my lips.

“what was it again?” he grabs my arm, pulling me into his lap. “‘boring’, did you say?”

i’m trying to escape and he’s trying to hold me still. gradually, our laughter dies out and we become aware, so much more aware.

“got some on your mouth,” he says in the heat of the moment, running his thumb over my bottom lip.

there was definitely no pizza sauce or whatever on my mouth, but i play my part. somehow, his thumb finds its way inside my mouth and i instinctively wrap my tongue around it. his green eyes glimmer like shiny marbles as he watches me

suck

on his

thumb.

i feel pressure underneath me, something building up in stiffness. i shift his hand away, glancing down and then back up again. his marble eyes, they just look at me. look through me.

no way in hell did i imagine this moment to actually happen. i mean, most of us girls had these insane crushes on teachers, but never did i think it’d unravel like this.

he firmly places his hand on my lower backside and pushes me closer to himself. “what, you scared now?” he whispers, dominance combined with confidence, topped off with lust.

i gulp, trying to sound brave, “and why would i be scared?”

“you should be,” he replies.

i am lost for words. this kind of intimidation is seductive. all i wanna do is kiss him! though i won’t make the same mistake of glancing at his lips twice.

he speaks in a soft tone, “has anyone ever told you how captivating your~”

“my eyes are?” i finish his cliché line off for him.

“...your lips,” he corrects, casting his gaze down at them.

i bite my bottom lip, flustered for acting like a smartass.

“you know, on some occasions, i’ve noticed that you bite your lip when you’re nervous. it’s cute,” he grins, “i like it more than i should,” and waits patiently for me to fall into his devilish trap.

believe me when i say i’m trying goddamn hard to not sink my teeth into my flesh! which is why i replace it with a mere innocent gulp.

“but on most occasions, you gulp,” he says as i’m gulping.

he removes the hair from my neck.

i get hella anxious, hella aroused so i..

“nuh~uh,” he shakes his head and pulls my bottom lip down with the pad of his thumb. “‘nough biting from you, sweetheart. those are mine to bite now.”

am i dreaming right now?

i try to reposition myself by moving a little back so that i’m not directly on him. as i do this, his erection rubs further into me and i slightly moan kinda too evidently. my eyes open super wide and i instantly shut my mouth. it surprises me that it doesn’t faze him one bit.

“your t~t~thing is p~poking me..” i gesture with my eyes to his manhood.

his orbs shine like someone has stabbed an apocalyptic emerald sunset multiple times. it’s glorifying. magical. the stuff dreams are made from. and instead, he pushes me further down onto his sculpture. he leans his head in, his mouth millimetres away from mine.

“and do you like it?” he questions seriously.

our noses touch, our lips brush...

“answer the question.”

“yes,” i squeak. “i like it.”

i try to remain as calm as possible, but it’s impossible due to the nerves causing havoc inside me, particularly the nerves between my thighs. i don’t know what to focus on. that mouth? his eyes? or down below...

“may i let something be known, luv?” sir requests politely.

i nod.

“i can see your tits...through that shirt...” he whispers sexily.

my breath hitches up.

kiss me! why won’t he kiss me? just fucking kiss me! shit, it’s impossible not to look. i give in and look at his lips. the corners curve slightly into a wayward grin. i see... he wants me to initiate it.

welp, sorry, no can do, mister.

he literally places my bottom lip between his teeth and lightly tugs at it, his breaths hitting my mouth like rose petals. this act is enormously enticing, but i know he’s teasing me.

my turn.

i purposely grind in his lap and he suppresses a hoarse groan. then he scoffs. very conceited. he’s so gonna lose. i keep my lips impossibly close to his for when he forfeits which should be right about...now.

he shakes his head smugly.

i frown, pouting.

he half~smiles adorably.

fine, i have a better idea. one he doesn’t see cumming coming.

i lift away the waistband of my borrowed sweatpants and grip his hand. his body automatically tenses up. i can feel him getting harder from just the thoughts i’m giving him. i bring his hand closer to me. he’s losing and it’s hella entertaining to watch.

unexpectedly, a phone goes off and i jump in fright. i rapidly get off him and he returns to his usual, rigid ways. he aggressively clears his throat before answering that stupid device.

whilst pacing up and down and holding his forehead, he stares at me intently like i’m that fucking maths problem again!

[anestheticrage]

Be me: Japanese honor student🎓, 15, with half a brain and even less of a plan. Hunting bitches by day and witches by night. Livin that dank only child✌️ life while mom n dad yeet all over the globe, leavin me plenty of time to forget not to make 2 lunches for myself #quirky 😜

no time for socialization or basic electronics skills ???📱??? when your best friends are an alien demon rabbit🐰👽 and the inexplicable Hole ™ in your brain. lmao, btw did i mention im ✨M✨A✨G✨I✨C✨A✨L✨

dreamin bout my 2D waifus again when familiar pink haired cancer patient dances through my brain passin out fliers: Kamihama Meguca Dating Service: Sponsored by Cult of the Magius. 250 stones per session 🤔

seems legit, Mr. Moneybags. wasn't spending my unwieldy sack of gemstones on anything else anyway. lets pull 💎💎💎

first up we have Redhead Radagast and her plethora of plants. 🌿☺️🦎

anndd, nearly dies immediately. 

well not off to a great start but i guess shes pretty cute at lea- oh FUCK its her girlfriend, Tsundere Poseidon😒🔱💦, and their exasperated, straight and single Sword Mom 😔🗡️🔥. fml gonna have to save up for the next pull. might as well play a few rounds with what i got tho. 

get in some good girl talk about things like school, color coded hair styles, body count, permanent soul damage, and our personal demon pacts. ya know, the usual 😚 . realize my dark backstory seems to be missing, so the girls take me to Ketchup Queen Sappho 🍅🥧 (wtf?) to molest my glowy egg stone. whatevs, more action than ive had since Kuroe 🖤 got added to the story anyway

the gang agrees it's time to hunt down the cutest rabbit pimp 🕶️🐇💵 in the city. >> say 🎵mukyuuu🎵 one more time and ill hug you so hard my backstory will pop right out, you adorable fluffy bastard. plz be my new best friend 💕

Form brand new friendship pact with Kyubae, and remember that my lil Sis 🐥 was always the best wingman for pickin up magic chicks, and kept her side of the room so spotless i forgot she existed. whoops 乁༼☯‿☯✿༽ㄏ Maybe if I find her i can stop paying these exorbitant pull fees.📵💎

speaking of which: hot damn this week's featured bachelorette is a 19 year old model and magical detective🔎 with massive levels of PTSD and self loathing 🥵💙💦 more likely to stab you or dramatically jump off a rooftoop than utter a single positive comment. wow, maybe i really COULD find true love…

... if i had MORE THAN A 1% FUCKING DRAW CHANCE. 😡 smh

hard to make much progress finding sis or winning the broken heart of a hard boiled detective amidst the never ending lover's quarrel of the Trident Vine Lesbians. 💔 Sword Mom tells them if they don't behave a monster will take them away. LOL classic mom 🤣

>>>HOLY FUCK IT DID

declare all-out war on urban legends, starting with staircases ⚔️ to reunite the dysfunctional trio, and hope that I net a way better lineup with the next 10x pull. at least sad sleuth lady came to help out. they say combat is the best way to bond wi-   and there she goes off the rooftop again 🙄 fml

alright that got way off track, we need a fresh start, away from all the loli drama. how bout a little B&E🔓🔨🤷🏻‍♀️ at the local house of worship to clear my head. ahh nothing like the unanswered prayers of the masses to get you in the mood for another wasted pull, and the 🔥 MIGHTIEST 🔥 headache you could ask for with a side of Double Cooked Pork 🐖🍜 (meh 5/10🧾)

venture forth into the spiritual unknown with your new human flamethrower🔥🌻🧡 and ask your favorite private eye to please, for the love of Eve, trade Meguca accounts with me~~~ Head through the eastern spirit portal to meet up with hologram propaganda sis and detective crush's evil ex, who joined a dating-app cult (#fuck) and also turned into the moon?🌕?(that's rough buddy)

get ambushed by Acid Horse on Wheels 🌈🐴 and vomit up my soul so hard that its time for a crossover episode. T U R F F F   W A R R R *que operatic harmonies* 💛 Blondie with the hair drills and enough attitude and guns to fill up a noble phantasm tries to ban my account permanently, but PI heartthrob denies her admin privileges. aww babe i didn't know you cared. 😭♥️

get kidnapped by my new true love and go back to her place 😏  defs enough empty rooms to house five emotionally traumatized girls and at least two ghosts hehehe👻 XD 💚🃏💜🎸 decide to form the anti-gossip brigade and recruit my blazing sunflower after getting ambushed by the witch living in my fruit loops🥣

❌outvoted 2:1 that cults are bad. mf. fiinneee one last pull to round out the team and then I'll delete the app. cmonnn Karin 🎃~

OH HELL YEAH TWO FOR ONE.

Always wanted a daughter 💜🔨🐄 with a penchant for pissing off the local Martial Arts & Books Club and drinking suspicious liquids offered by total strangers. Well if it's good enough for her AND the sexy mayadere with enough game to seduce a mermaid, might as well get in on that myself. 

#curseddrank 🤢 0/24 would not recommend to a friend, 'cept maybe Ria

win alot of cash 🤑, blow up a fountain, meet the pied piper²🎶🖕, moon cult, monochrome feathers, something about liberation✊🏻; adopt temper tantrum cow girl. aces 💜🥩

Next up!!! skydiving with DJ Hammer! Jump to apparently-not-certain death after suicidal A.I. 💚💾🗼 tells you to rescue her hostage before they run out of Radiohead albums and have to move on to Thom Yorke's solo discography. save the invisible shield kitten 💚👑😿 from happiness and get chased through the internet by the sexiest homicidal Paint Pallette 💚🎨😈 since Caravaggio. (apparently green is the color of the digital apocalypse. i’m deleting Kako from my friend's list)

that’s it, fuck this app. 250 stones 💎 per-life-threatening-experience is more than i’m willing to deal with 😓 don’t wanna mess with the perfect nuclear family anyway. we've already got: 

✔️the two emotionally traumatized moms with memory and commitment issues

✔️the adhd daughter with anger management problems and a giant hammer

✔️the psychologically abused scizophrenic cat

✔️and the eccentric aunt with crippling anxiety

#squadgoals

now that were done hoarding bitches, its time to hunt the witches. and the bitches makin the witches. btw did i mention the witches ARE the bitches! AND WERE ALL GOING TO DIE!? 📽️⁉️💀 wait fuck lets back up a second

This is Nemo📕 and Token🧪 and they have all the answers but prefer if you only ask vague questions in exchange for vague responses so they can fill in the rest by discussing their superior intellect 🧠 at length. not to mention they built that dating app, so of course everyone in my harem decides to be a FUCKING. TRAITOR.🤬

cept waifu prime ofc 🥰💙. [PTSD > brainwashing] 'yOu CaN bE tHe LeAdEr NoW'. i have been from the very beginning you traumatized Hinedere nightmare. maybe if you weren't so caught up collecting surrogate daughters you would've noticed IM👏THE👏ONLY👏 ONE👏PROGRESSING👏THE FUCKING👏PLOT✨

rescue the rest of dysfunctional found-family™ from selves before my adorable firebender burns down Disnihama🎡🔥😱 during her weekly anxiety attack. (love the makeover T B H) 

CHAPTER 8: Magical Girl Massacre🩸🗡️

   - everyone has like, the shittiest day ever

   - the new Pope really needs to be extradited from the church

   - make friends with a really pretty tree 🌺🌲✨

i swear, if i don't finish this god damn story in time to get that free pull im gonna beat the shit out of every mirror i find in that giant mansion that i haven't even had any time to even mention yet. 🖕🏚️ let alone EVERYTHING happening with the prequel [fuck you, I'm the star] girls 💗💜💙💛❤️️ and their multidimensional melodrama. We don't need that many repetitive af episodes to emphasize that Homo-ra is a shitty person. we've all seen Rebellion. 🙄

NO, I DONT CARE IF YOU WANT SAPPHO'S BACKSTORY, I ONLY HAVE 79 STONES LEFT AND IF YACHAN FINDS OUT I HAVEN'T DELETED THE APP YET IM GONNA HAVE TO GO SLEEP IN WITH SANA 😭💎💸😠

uhhhggggg where were we… Topple a cult and burn down Hotel Denoument only to realize that Sis was fused with the dating app servers this entire madokafuckin time (told ya she was the best wingman 😊). 

Dilemma: Sis =🥚, Triumvirate of Trouble want 🐣. What do? vote now:

Help Hatch - IIIIIII

Not Do That - IIIII

What The Actual Fuck Is Going On - IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Lets just fight everyone until something good happens.

🔥🔫🔥🗡️🔥😱🔥🌆🔥😱🔥🛡️🔥💣🔥

Kill (???) the artist-in-chief of the italian reindeer murder police after teaching her the true meaning of Christmas 🎄 hatch 🐣lil Sis and realize she WAS your wingman all along🐰 MUKYUUUU! we're just gonna ignore how much trouble it would have saved if you'd just mentioned that. "yOu DiDnT aSk..." 

FUCK YOU SPACE BITCH. ONCE AN INCUBATOR ALWAYS AN INCUBATOR 🖕🐇🔪

anywho, somewhere along the lines we of course summoned the Antichrist ⚙️ because why not raise the stakes to max and still not kill off a single character. Madofuckinkami, can we PLEASE wrap this up. 😩💤

feathers (not the culty kind, tfm) rain from the sky, and the power of friendship and not having the Urobutcher 🔪🩸as a lead writer saves our peacefully sectioned off alternate reality 😇

TL:DR fuck cults, real life waifus DO exist, don't sell your soul to space rabbits, or your stones to megacorporations. Enjoy arc 2 on the JP server with your shitty translation patch you filthy fuckin weebs 

Yours Truly, 

- Thirsty Weeb Eroha 💗💎😘 

[xallivewantedx]

The Reboot

So I abandoned this stuff for a while because I was trying to be better... healthier. But now I am the highest weight I have ever been and I just can’t deal with it anymore. I gained weight for good reason- I was blessed with a perfect baby boy who I love more than anything. I did not restrict at all and I was dreadfully fatigued the whole pregnancy so I could barely move. But now we are past that and I am finally starting to lose again. I need to get back to my old size- at least give it my best effort. I ca feel my husband being less attracted to me. I don’t even feel attractive to myself. 

Pre- baby & pre-marriage... I was a size 0/2. Lowest weight: 109 lbs. Current weight postpartum and post-covid (we hope!): 155 lbs. Size 10. I was at 165 but I have lost some in the past few months. None of my old clothes fit and now things are starting to open up and people want to hang out but I just can’ face it until I am at least back in a size 4. I am hoping to hit 150 by next week and then steadily keep losing at least 3 lbs per week after that. I don’t care if it takes me until Fall to do it I am going to lose all the weight. I will not be satisfied until I am back in a size 2. Before I had my baby, I was serving tables and bartending. I was on my feet all the time and I used it to lose weight. I wouldn’t eat all day and I would work doubles most days of the week. I would even go to the gym on those days sometimes just to give myself an extra push. When I came home I would only allow myself a little vegan ramen and tofu and that was it. I sometimes took sleeping pills on my days off so I would sleep the entire day away and not buy food. I was obsessed, but it worked. I got into the best shape of my life. I look at my photos from just 2 or 3 years ago and think... wow. I really looked beautiful. I wish I had appreciated it more. Now I can not even look at a photo of me without crying. 

Finally I am vaccinated and have been able to go to a gym again. 

Goal weight 1: 150 lbs // GW2: 145 lbs // etc ... UGW: 115 lbs

So far I have been pretty good with my eating- not totally restricting but I am keeping it below 1000 calories. I have been reading posts on here about how it is not possible to gain weight eating like 1200 calories or something but... I def beg to differ. I have been eating really healthy throughout my pregnancy, and not really going too high above 1500 calories and I have gained A LOT of weight. I think I just have a really slow metabolism. My mom and my grandmother have had eating disorders. My grandma was anorexic her whole life. She actually tried to kill herself right before her 80th birthday bc my family tried to make her take pills to increase her appetite and make her eat more. She hid them all. Then when they made her take them she tried to commit suicide. So ... after generations of this I think my body is just over it. It hangs onto every single calorie I eat. I was always around a size 6 until I started restricting seriously to 600 calories or less a day. I am sorry but I am too petite to look good in a size 6. Taller girls look perfect in a 6 but being 5′2″ I just look like Humpty Dumpty. 

I noticed when I lost weight- like at my absolute SMALLEST, men would slip into my DM’s NON STOP. It was obscene! Every single day, if I met a straight man anywhere- in class, at a restaurant, at work, ANYWHERE he would 9 times out of 10 dm me later and try to get me to come out with him. Now I am very happily married but I am not gonna lie, I miss being seen as beautiful. I feel like now I am just blending into the background or something. It is so lonely becoming a mom - especially in covid isolation. It’s like, I lost a lot of myself. I definitely don’t want to be single again and I won’t do anything with anyone, it’s more just about the confidence and feeling seen. I want to wear my cute outfits and my cute makeup and feel sexy while also being an awesome mama and wife. I feel like my husband deserves a beautiful wife. 

 *sighs* welp... that’s my therapy today. lol

[punkscowardschampions]

Jude & Jac

Jude: [okay so my idea is that like Jesse is doing some kind of little christmassy gig at Pete's record store and cafe moment because why not] Jude: You ready to 👀 the 🎄🎅 classics get 💀🔪🎤? Jac: You usually have to be famous before you sell out for Christmas royalties Jude: he's not NOT famous rn Jac: 🙄 you get a badge for signing up Jude: I should get a blue peter badge for rigging up his lil stage & backdrop Jac: if he was famous, he'd have roadies for that Jac: not unpaid family members Jude: 💻⭐dom for you Jac: This country fame for you Jac: it means about 10 people outside of Dublin have heard of you but EVERYONE here knows you Jac: so fun Jude: 🤣 by that I'm a star too & without a single 📀 Jac: Reputation doesn't imply any skill or talent Jude: 😜✌ Jude: coming or what? Jac: obviously not Jude: Jess'll be 😒💔 Jude: probs inspire him to belt out silent night with a well new twist 🎻🎻😭 Jude: 👍 or 👎 tbc Jac: I doubt that Jac: but he's welcome for the make or break Jude: 🏆🥇 Jac: whatever accolades he does or doesn't get are his business Jac: I'm going out Jude: Where? Jude: can I come? Jac: out Jac: and no, you have prior obligations Jude: Who with? Jac: Jesse, clearly Jude: Nah, who are YOU going with Jac: nosy Jude: tell me then Jac: 😂 Jac: why Jude: Why not? Jac: because it'll annoy you, is the easiest answer to that Jude: either it's top secret & that's just fun or it ain't and I'll see whatever 📷 clues on my feed in a bit Jude: I can annoy you loads more with my qs before that, like Jac: if you're such a fan of discretion you wanna work a bit harder at it yourself Jude: ?? Jac: when you said you had loads of questions, I thought you meant more than marks Jude: 😝 Jac: and I'm the poor conversationalist Jude: you're the mute Jude: Jess is the shit conversationalist Jac: who could get a word in with you around Jude: Lucky we all know sign language Jac: for my uni application Jac: nothing else Jude: be a bit rude if you singled out uncle Bob as the 1 person you did talk to Jac: bit fucking weird Jude: that too Jac: not gonna come for your gig on that either Jude: you'd have a job to Jac: thanks for the unintentional compliment Jude: welcome Jac: did you take my good pair of tights? Jude: not gonna go rob the place Jac: guess I'll just freeze to death Jude: RIP Jac: thanks Jude: 1. might be more helpful if I knew where you were going 2. welcome again 3. tis the season ⚰💀💔 Jac: 1. the north pole, to see santa and his pals 2. no need to stand on formalities 3. you're thinking of easter Jude: 1. say hey from me 2. I don't do formal 3. nah, I was thinking of how busy the 📞s are & how many people top themselves Jac: Cheery, aren't we Jac: you need some carols Jude: I can read a room Jac: laughable Jude: wish you would Jude: you a need a laugh Jac: if anyone can make it happen Jac: it wouldn't be you Jude: 🤡🤡🤡 Jac: seeing if Jameson still cries might make me crack a smile Jude: there you go, that's the spirit Jac: ugh stop Jude: ?? Jac: you aren't a fucking samaritan Jude: haven't made it official Jude: probs too young Jac: I haven't looked into it Jac: do you really want to be responsible for loads of losers offing themselves though Jude: when you put it like that Jac: you haven't got the temperament Jude: I heard you ain't looked into it Jude: but alright Jac: I've known you long enough to know you'd push a sane person over the edge Jude: whoops Jude: 🤪 Jac: hmm Jude: You gonna gatecrash Izzy's bday? Jude: I'm so coming if you are Jac: Why would I do that Jac: time how long it is before she has a breakdown? Jude: you did it for Millz' bday Jude: & she didn't FULLY have a breakdown though the gays ain't over it still Jac: Isabelle's life is already ruined, no need to do anything Jude: her ma would probs chuck you out anyway Jac: the role reversal would be nice for her no doubt Jude: as priorities go, doubt it's top of hers for what'd be nice Jac: 'cos giving a shit about her daughter clearly is, alright Jude: why are you going off on her ma? Jac: just because they're poor doesn't mean you can't say anything bad about them Jac: if her mum was about then none of it would've happened Jac: she can't even be arsed to take time off work to give Is time to heal Jude: & if her da was about, her ma might be able to afford to Jude: they're skint, you just said it Jac: if she knew who he was, he might be Jac: don't give me that, as if you know her Jac: she's a shit mum, always has been, and that's what happens Jude: alright Jac: so no, I'm not going to her sad party Jude: you should at least 🗨 Jac: no Jude: Come on, she's having a shit time Jac: Good Jude: 🥶 Jac: I didn't like her before she got felt up Jac: I don't like her now Jude: Bollocks, you were mates for time Jac: yeah, ask her how good of a mate I was Jac: or Amelia Jac: it meant fuck all Jude: 🙄 lies Jac: if you wanna lie to yourself, sure Jude: if you do, crack on Jac: evidence is in my favour so I'm fine with it Jude: Nah Jude: Amelia wouldn't still be 💔🎻😭 if you were such a shit mate & she was chuffed to be rid Jac: Amelia has her own angst to worry about Jac: as you mentioned Jude: yeah & part of it is you Jude: 🗑ing her off Jac: only when her girlfriend cheated on her Jude: & before Jac: you lez off with her if you're so fucking interested Jac: precisely 0 people will be surprised Jude: girls don't do nowt for me Jude: especially ones I've grown up with Jude: 0/10 interest tah Jac: sure Jude: Yeah I am Jac: probably stop going on and on about her then Jude: Touchy Jude: barely said anything Jac: you saying a word is a word too many for me Jude: 🤐 Jude: g2g as it happens Jac: 'tis the season Jude: +353 1 671 0071 Jude: 📞 it if you wanna 🗨 to someone else Jac: fuck off Jude: Love you too Jude: 👋 Jac: nope Jude: my declaration of 💘 isn't a q Jude: soz but not soz Jac: the too makes it false Jude: nope Jude: you love me Jac: no, I don't Jac: go away Jude: yeah, you do Jude: see you later Jac: go jump off o'connell bridge Jude: you're the only one freezing to death tonight, mate Jac: always next year Jac: he must not have got my letter in time Jude: next year I'll probs be ☕🤗 too Jude: defs is the season for that Jac: if you're not going to talk like an adult, then doubly don't bother Jude: 🤣 Jac: I cannot be clearer than fuck off and die Jac: I'm trying to get ready Jude: I'm getting ready too Jude: it's obvs doable Jac: you'll look a state Jac: I don't plan to Jude: funny Jac: just my honest assessment Jude: your snaps tell a different story of the state of you but alright Jac: first I need a laugh, the next you blast me for having one Jac: it's almost like you say whatever bullshit is floating around your head at the time, with no thought or feeling behind it Jude: don't sound like me, that 😜 Jac: not even slightly funny Jude: idc Jac: that's evident Jude: 👍✔ Jac: have fun hanging around your own brother like you wanna fuck him Jude: even less funny Jude: we're proper scraping the barrel now Jac: you'll be hearing that your whole life Jude: 💔 Jac: exactly Jude: 😭 Jac: just do it quietly Jude: can't & won't Jac: it's pretty much white noise at this point Jude: have you got with Raf? Jac: who? Jude: [some boy's profile like it him] Jac: oh Jac: maybe Jac: can't remember Jude: 👌 Jac: why Jude: Jess asked Jude: she's 🤔💭 about it Jac: lovely Jude: can't have been if you don't remember it Jac: she doesn't need to send my regards Jude: obvs, she wanted to know if he's worth bothering with Jude: there's her answer Jac: like anyone is Jude: so dramatic Jac: *not gonna get used all my life Jude: 🙄 Jac: my thoughts exactly Jude: 👋 fr then Jude: leave you to your 💭 Jac: yeah, foreign concept to you Jac: later Jude: ✌️

[sweetcocacola]

Tagged by @jiayoujiayi

The rules are:

1. Tag the person who tagged you

2. Answer the questions.

3. Tag 10 people (LOL I have like no friends)

Let’s get it started!

•How tall are you?

HAHA 5′6 FEAR ME 

•What colour and style is your hair?

It’s brown-black and naturally wavy, but I straighten it most of the time bc curly hair is a hassle :<

•What colour are your eyes?

Light Brown

•Do you wear glasses?

I need glasses but I walk around blind bc I don’t like how glasses look on me

Might try contacts if my parents let bc I wanna try out blue eyes :0

•Do you wear braces?

Nope but I don’t like my teeth v much so I should? I’m kinda too old to get braces tho

•What’s your fashion sense?

Black and green, leather jackets and bombers, combat boots and caps :)) 

Some lady on the train held her hand protectively over her bag when I walked into the cart so I guess I look like a thug LMAOO

I’ve been told I look scary and tbh I don’t mind this :)) FEAR ME 

Grandma says I need to find a mans tho so I’m tryna dress more casual/feminine nowadays but the bomber is a must !!

•Full name?

Jessie (嘉曦)

Nicknames: Jess, Jechu, 小曦 

•When were you born?

Nov 06 2001

•Where are you from and where do you live now?

NYC ♡ I’m a city girl

•What school do you go to?

In the fall I’ll be going to Binghamton University!! It’s not in a city so idk how I’m gonna survive tbh

•What kind of student are you?

I don’t study but somehow manage to pass 

I got into a program that lets me get my MBA in 5 years though so I swear I’ll start studying in college

•Do you like school?

My current HS has like 6k kids and I love that I got to meet so many people over the past four years, but my college is like 4 hours from home and only has 14% Asians so I’m scared about being outside my comfort zone for the next 4 years

•Favourite subject?

AP Macroeconomics I guess? It’s the only course I’m taking rn that will relate to my major in college 

•Favourite TV show?

Recommendations: 偶像练习生 (Idol Producer), 晨阳 (Rising Dawn/The First Light)

Currently watching: 喜欢你我也是 (Like you, Me Too), 遇见你真好 (Nice to Meet You)

On Hiatus: 奇妙食光 (Fantasy Restaurant), 青春的花路 (Flower Road), all the CW shows

•Favourite Movie?

AVENGERS: INFINITY WAR!!!

•Favourite books?

Macbeth, Brave New World

Currently reading Our Calculating Stars and it’s p good so far

•Favourite pastime?

Honestly I used to like cook, bake, paint, and do photography but rn all I do is laze around and watch ZXJ videos

•Do you have any regrets?

Yeah, I regret not joining more teams in HS, like cheerleading, debate, dance, etc. but I’ll def. try out for these in college!

•Dream job?

Honestly I want to do something arts or entertainment related: I’ve wanted to be a musician for most of my life but tbh not gonna happen and if I told my parents they’d probably have a heart attack LOL

So I’ve resigned myself to my fate of doing Business Administrations woohoo

•Would you ever like to be married?

Yeah I get lonely easily :<

•Would you like to have kids?

TBH not that fond of kids but uh gotta pass on these genes and continue the family tree right

•How many?

1-2?

•Do you like shopping?

Yeah but I always end up buying dumb stuff :(( I like IRL shopping with my friends but I haven’t gone in a while

•What countries have you visited?

China, Canada, US

I go to Canada so often that the border patrol looks at my passport suspiciously everytime LOL

Haven’t gone back to China in a long time but would like to visit again, and I also want to visit England, France, HK, Japan, Korea

•Scariest nightmare you have ever had?

Not scary but it’s the first nightmare I had when I was a kid: I was in my elementary school and there was no one there, so I went to the basement and there was a bear and a witch? I got tricked into drinking tea but it turned out to be ginger tea and I woke up screaming and sweating

TLDR: I don’t like ginger tea

•Any enemies?

LOL 

•Any significant other?

men ain’t shit except for zxj

•Do you believe in miracles?

I’d like to c:

•How are you?

P relaxed :)) Organizing my tumblr so I’m catching up on ZXJ updates and setting up an update schedule so you guys can count on regular updates from me from now on

Tagging people who have recently liked/reblogged from me :0

@chanyeolscheeksblog @car-tg @mochachiii @jasstine @09hearts

[yastaghr]

Carried Skeleton 4

A new chapter of Carried Skeleton is up! you can find it here or below:

https://archiveofourown.org/works/17443730/chapters/43931602

Papyrus heard that tell-tale shlop of earth shifting and braced himself not to turn around. He liked Flowey, but he didn’t like having to do the same thing over and over again. Still, he suspected that if he didn’t repeat himself it would get even worse. Much worse.

“Howdy!” Flowey said.

That was Papyrus’ cue to turn around and say, “OH. HELLO THERE. I DIDN’T KNOW THERE WERE ANY FLOWER MONSTERS IN SNOWDIN. ARE YOU NEW HERE?”

Flowey mumbled, “Um, yeah,” then he put on his worried face and asked, “Do you know the small skeleton on the edge of town between Waterfall and Snowdin?”

Papyrus nodded, hiding his confusion in the quick motion. Flowey hadn’t asked about Sans last time. Why would he? He’d met Sans timelines ago.

Flowey said, “I was practicing my trap-making earlier and accidentally caught him. He got hurt.”

“How bad?” Papyrus rushed the end of Flowey’s sentence. Sans had a very low maximum health count and it was too early in the run for him to have stored up much extra from sleep.

Flowey hedged, “Not bad, no, not bad, but I didn’t want him to get worse just because I can’t use healing magic. Can you help?”

Papyrus hesitated. Sans was hurt, he should go, but...they were almost out of groceries. He wouldn’t have anything to feed Sans if he didn’t get the groceries. Welp, he could ask Flowey. He’d asked Flowey to look after Sans while he was stuck in the hospital last run. He didn’t think Flowey had let him down, and this was a lot less difficult, so-

Papyrus asked, “We’re almost out of food at the house. I’ll need healing food for when I’ve finished fixing him. If I give you the money and the shopping list, would you pick them up for me?”

Flowey nodded. Papyrus handed him the shopping list. When Flowey scanned it, he bristled. Papyrus wasn’t sure why, not 100%. It might just be that Flowey didn’t like tomatoes, or that he’d been told about Sans’ smoothie thing last time. Papyrus doubted that. He’d had a theory developing for a few timelines now, a theory that Flowey had some of Asriel’s memories, or even was some kind of twisted remnant of their big brother.

He’d asked Alphys and found out about the flowers from Dad’s garden (thinking about Dad hurt. He missed Dad, and he didn’t understand why they couldn’t go back and live with him). She’d told him about experimenting on them. And Flowey had a lot of Asriel’s mannerisms. Sometimes he knew things he had no right knowing. But Papyrus wasn’t certain, and even when he was, he wouldn’t act unless Flowey chose to confide in him. He hoped he would. The pain from losing his brother and his sibling had never really gone away. Getting one of them back would be worth it.

The crack that sounded in the quiet room made everyone freeze. It was followed by a whimper. Then everyone turned to the sound. Sans, who had been playing over by the bookcase, was now sprawled on his front with a right angle bend in his right femur. It looked like he had tried to climb the shelves, but had fallen down. He was just beginning to pull himself up things and drag himself along them. He wasn’t even walking! How could he have gotten high enough off the ground to break his leg?

Asriel was the first to move. He jumped down from the table. He and Papyrus had been playing with some crayons. He wiped away some tears as he rushed over to his youngest brother. Small, furry hands picked Sans up carefully, trying hard not to jostle the bones.

Papyrus came over as well. He pulled a handkerchief out of his pocket and tied it around the bone fragments so they wouldn’t bleed out. Then he pulled out another and used it to wipe off some of Sans’ tears. He kept wiping as the Asriel started walking off towards the front yard. When they got out, Toriel was trying to coax the now teenaged Chara out of the big tree.

Asriel called out, “Mom! Sans hurt himself!”

Both Toriel and Chara turned. When they saw the blood-stained rag, Toriel immediately ran over and Chara dropped down from the tree. Toriel knelt down and picked Sans up. Papyrus untied the handkerchief and let her see the break. It went clean through the bone. Chara hissed.

Toriel said, “Oh, dear. Chara, can you get me some small, straight branches from the tree? Asriel, you can get me a bowl of water from the sink. Papyrus, can you go get me the red kit with the white cross on it from under the bathroom sink? Good. Now, Sans?”

The little toddler looked up at her, tears in his eye sockets.

“I want you to squeeze my finger. Can you do that? Squeeze it nice and hard. That’s it, now squeeeeeeeze and-”

“hng!” Sans whimpered as Toriel snapped the bone back in line.

She murmured softly in his ear, “Good job, Sans. No more hurting - see? All done. May I heal it now?”

He glares at her, suspicious. She holds her smile. He looks down at his leg, then back at her. Then he nods.

Toriel hummed a quiet little tune as she hovered her hands just above the break. A green, healing fire surrounded the break. It was slightly warm and perfectly safe to stick your hand in.

The Queen frowned as the healing magic fizzled out so quickly. Sans’ leg was still broken. She tried lighting the magical fire again. It slid off the bone. Toriel’s frown deepened. Sans could not possibly be at full HP already, could he? She checked him.

“Sans” “The easiest enemy. Can only deal 1 damage.”

1 LV 1 / 1 HP 90 / 90 MP

AT: 1 (0) DF: 1 (-1) EXP: 0 NEXT: 10

WEAPON: None ARMOUR: None (Injured!)

GOLD: 0

Toriel sat down hard, her head spinning. It felt like the floor was falling out from underneath her. 1 HP. 1 HP. Sans, her adorable, curious little Sans, had a maximum of 1 HP. What had she done wrong? How had she failed him? He’d been with them for only six years, but 1 HP… most children had a minimum of 20. How had he ended up so fragile? Was it all the time he had been unable to eat? Was there something in his diet that he was missing? How could her child have become so low?

“Mom. I brought the sticks. Do you really need them if you’re just going to heal him?”

Toriel turned to Chara, tears in her eyes. “I already did, my child. It seems that Sans has a low maximum HP. Very low. In fact, I have never seen one lower. He only has 1 HP.”

Chara tilted their head. “Um...HP? That sounds like something out of a video game.”

Papyrus stumbled his way over to them with the first aid kit that was a third as big as he was. It was a good thing it was padded, because he dropped it onto the ground without thinking.

Toriel smiled weakly and said, “It is something like that, yes. HP is short for HOPE, which in turn is short for Health Or Physical Elevation. It is a way of quantifying how much physical damage you can take. It is a general rule of thumb that those are healthier have a higher level of HP. You, for example, have 50 HP. Papyrus has 30. Asriel has 60. Asgore and I both have 80. For Sans to only have 1…”

Chara jumped in. “Is there any way to raise those stats?”

“There are a few,” Toriel explained, “Many hotels here have rooms that are spelled to raise your HP levels above normal. Some monsters have them in their homes, too. You can also decrease the amount of damage that you take by working on several other stats.”

Papyrus set down the kit and raised his hand eagerly. “I KNOW THITH-  SORRY. THIS. THE HIGHER YOUR DEF IS, THE LETH- LESS DAMAGE YOU TAKE.”

Toriel patted him on the head and pulled the kit over to her. “Very true,” she said as she unzipped it, “DEF is very important. You can also raise your SPEED to move faster and avoid pain. There is also a stat called INV that I have never fully understood. I believe it has something to do with how long it takes for you to start being damaged? Those last two are more confusing. They are also harder to read, as they do not show up in a standard check.”

Chara narrowed their eyes, looking over their littlest brother. ** They’d tried to learn how to do these checking things, but what came up for them was even less than what came up for the monsters. Their pitiful checks only told them a monster’s ATK and DEF. They couldn’t even see HP. The flavour text didn’t help at all.

Asriel, who until this moment had been occupied with crying, said, “What about weapon and armour? We could get him some of those. They would help his ATK and DEF, at least.”

Toriel looked at him, startled, then smiled and nodded regally. “Thank you, Asriel. I will go rummage in the storage room to try and find him some. I am sure we have an amulet or two that will help. That is very thoughtful of you to say.”

Quietly, to themself, Chara vowed that they would find out more about these stats and find a way to make their baby brother safe.

[undertheflagrp]

THEA is a LEVEL ONE MYRMIDON. she excels in SPEED, DEXTERITY and CHARM. she is also a BOOKSTORE ASSISTANT in NOYILLAI.

   < HP: 18 >       < STR: 3 >       < MAG: 0 >       < DEX: 10 >       < SPD: 7 >               <  LCK: 2 >       <  DEF: 2 >      < RES  2 >      < CHA: 6 >

STATUS | NOTES | INTRODUCTION LOADING...

[ QUEST: FIRST FIGHTING LESSON]  

“pick it up.” the words fall from the elder man in front of her. he stands casually, obvious in his gait that he isn’t excited or interested in training, especially not her. it’s the underestimation as always. she’s a woman, well technically a girl barely older than thirteen. years younger than her brother and farther behind as his own training started when he already ten. it took begging on her part, just as she had done when she asked for lessons that weren’t meant for her. she’s gotten her way, but couldn’t she have at least gotten someone a little less, misogynistic.

althea decides against the desire to retort already and picks up the sword the man pointed to. it’s unfamiliar in its weight. a pure iron sword, one that her brother had practiced with long ago and should be glad that they aren’t going easy on her. she plays with the balance of the sword in her hands, growing used to it as best she can remembering that it is an extension of herself.

“are you ready yet? i don’t have all day.” the instructor yells out as he steps back to a space meant for sparring. althea sighs and nods, coming to stand opposite of the man twice her size. he gives her an unimpressed look as she hold the sword in two hands instead of one. she isn’t anywhere near able to hold it in one yet, but one day she will be.

the next hour is one of the most grueling in her life. he doesn’t pull his punches, landing the young girl on her ass more than times than she count. she should thank that at least the time she falls is because he easily blocks the sword she swings at him as he taunts at her. she half expects her butt to hurt in a few hours on top of all the other aches she’ll have on top of this. but each time althea gets back up. going again and again until the sweat is flowing down her back and glistening her forehead, hair sticking to places it shouldn’t.

the frustration grows inside of her, as she swings the sword at her instructor. as he easily dodges and twists and pushes her down again. but she gets up every time because she wanted this. she wanted to learn, to be something more, to learn how to fight for herself. she won’t rest, she won’t stop till he says because she doesn’t want to be perceived as weak, as the thing that so many men think of her gender.

one hour turns into two and by the end she’s hunched over. breath coming out in shallow sounds, sword barely between two fingers as she grips her knees. the instructor makes a sound that almost sounds like a laugh. “i’m surprised with you. i would have half expected someone like you to give up within the first ten minutes, let alone two hours.”

she looks up from her knees, staring straight into his eyes. “i’m impressed. i will teach you. same time tomorrow, do not be late.” and despite the grueling hours she spent and the feeling like her limbs are like jello, she feels like this is the first time she’s truly been alive.

         “it was your life or mine, i chose mine.”

[av-ryan]

TEXTS; AV & GEORGIE

JULY

AV Ryan

What's that real fun German phrase you taught me? 'That's sausage to me.' or 'That's like sausage to me.' Or something?

Also hey George, glad you're here.

Georgie Ryan

The one that means you don't care, right? That's sausage to me. Das ist mir Wurst, if you wanna say it in German.

Hey AV. Glad to be here.

What's up with the strip club and stuff?

AV Ryan

Das ist mir Wurst, that's it. Lemme guess, Roe already told you all about it?  It was fun, you came a day too late.

Georgie Ryan

Nah, I haven't asked Roe yet

I just know about the aliens story

Sadly, tbh

AV Ryan

Well that just means we need to go out again

Georgie Ryan

Not opposed

All for it, really

I heard it's a big island anyway

AV Ryan

From the looks of it it does look like there's a lot of shit we can do.

Georgie Ryan

Yeah. I saw some of it on the way to the grocery store. It's a cute town, very fancy Academy

AV Ryan

I mean it’s an old legacy school right? Makes sense that it’s fancy AF

Georgie Ryan

I guess

I just wasn't expecting having to brush my hair in the morning to fit in

AV Ryan

Fuck that, let your hair be wild

Georgie Ryan

For sure, I was joking

AV Ryan

Yeah I knew that. Okay so we have like a week before we go to Mexico start teaching me the Español por favor!

Georgie Ryan

You wanna know the basic stuff? The stuff to avoid? Or the fun stuff?

AV Ryan

All of the above?

Georgie Ryan

Alright, gimme a moment

AV Ryan

As soon as I figure out my finances, I'll treat you to lunch as compensation

Georgie Ryan

Nah, it's fine AV! You know I'm happy to teach you this stuff

AV Ryan

Okay but like I still want to take advantage of us being here and take you out to lunch one of these days.

Georgie Ryan

Alright, deal

It's not compensation tho, we're hanging out

Okay, unidade 1. Very important sentence.

[ Voice message ] Yo solo estoy bromeando.

It means "I'm just kidding"

AV Ryan

Lol. No one can ever say you don't know me. That's probably exactly what I need before I go down there and offend someone on accident.

[ Voice Message ]: Yo solo estoy bromeando.

Like that?

Georgie Ryan

I love you, but we're trying not to cause an international accident down there

Mhm, yeah! Just add a little extra R

[ Voice message ]: Bro**meando

AV Ryan

I'll be careful. The last thing I want to do is get thrown in a Mexican jail. 

[ Voice Message ]: Yo solo estoy bromeando. Better?

Georgie Ryan

That's perfect AV! Like, real good!

Alright, now also real important stuff. Is there anything you absolutely do not want in you food or drinks? Or is everything game?

AV Ryan

Bugs I absolutely want 0 bugs in any of my shit. Except tequila

Georgie Ryan

Alright, so you can go the easy route or the fancy route, up to you!

[ Voice message ] No insectos, correcto? 

[ Voice message ] No hay insectos en su receta, correcto?

First one means "no bugs, right?" and the second one means "there are no bugs in your recipe, right?"

AV Ryan

Now you know imma pick the fancy way. 

[ Voice message ] No hay insectos en su receta, correcto?

Georgie Ryan

And I love you for it

Sounds awesome!!! That's it!

AV Ryan

Awesome

okay last one for today: do you think aliens are real?

Georgie Ryan

Ohhh, good one!

[ Voice message ] Tú piensas que extraterrestres existen?

AV Ryan

Legit. Amazing actually. 

[ Voice message ] Tú piensas que extraterrestres existen?

Georgie Ryan

Yep, that's it! Just go a bit slower on the extraterrestres and you'll be fine!

AV Ryan

Yer wonderful! What are you most excited about in Mexico?

Georgie Ryan

The vacation

Just kidding, the food too

And I kinda wanna know if it's like a stay at a hotel and do whatever you want school trip or if they have guided tours through the city and stuff, because I def wanna go in one of those

AV Ryan

This school seems like the place that would have one of those for us. And if not, you could make that happen easy.

Georgie Ryan

It does, right?

I feel like they're going to have all of our minutes planned out for us, no joke.

For sure! I could ask the people that actually live there for the real cool spots too

AV Ryan

Hey, it's free so I'm not complaining. Fuck yea. That's what I did when I was in Hawaii. The locals really made my three years there special.

Georgie Ryan

Neither am I! A whole planned vacation? Sign me up.

You got to know all the cool restaurants and hang out spots? If we ever end up there in one of these school trips, you gotta show us.

AV Ryan

Yuppers and even better the uncrowded local beaches. Oh you know I will

Georgie Ryan

That's golden info right there

AV Ryan

Hell yes

Georgie Ryan

Hey AV, you free anytime this week?

AV Ryan

I'm always free, what's up?

Georgie Ryan

These escorting rules and having to be paired up to go to town

I wanna check if the fancy hotel or the gallery have any job openings.

AV Ryan

I got you. Tell me when.

Georgie Ryan

Wednesday morninggg

AV Ryan

Yeah okay. While we're out nah nevermind What time?

Georgie Ryan

What? What is it

Like around 10?

AV Ryan

I had to look to see if there was a Veteran Affairs office on island and there isn't. So I'll just have to do it online which I hate but whatever

Yeah 10 works

Georgie Ryan

Want me to do it with you? I can offer words of encouragement or of distraction

Cool! Thanks AV!

AV Ryan

Maybe proof read all the applications and forms before I submit them?

Yeah, I'll come pick you up

Georgie Ryan

Yeah, sure! I can help with that

Cool cool cool, I'll be ready

AV Ryan

That way I can start getting my benefits again

Georgie Ryan

Got itttt! Important stuff then

I'll def help

We can do it before we head into town?

AV Ryan

Yeah okay

AV Ryan

Thanks for helping me this morning. Did you do everything you needed to do while we were in town?

Georgie Ryan

No problemmm. If you need more help with those, let me know!

I did, yeah! I'm leaning towards the gallery's job opening. Seems less... stuck up than the hotel. But I'll apply for both.

AV Ryan

Okay I will. Hopefully this worked and we won’t have to do it again but you know how the military is

Which positions did you apply for?

Georgie Ryan

Yeah

But it's totally fine, AV. I don't mind doing it again, as long as you get your stuff in the end

Soooo, at the hotel I applied for guest manager. And at the gallery for tourist receptionist.

AV Ryan

Yeah I know but it’s just annoying when you have to do all the paperwork again and again just because they can’t get their shit together. I really do appreciate you though, George. Oh you’ll definitely get it both of them, definitely. You have the whole I speak five languages thing going for you

Georgie Ryan

That is for sure, because they just come up with new weird rules all the time too

Yeah, I hope so! I'm leaning towards the gallery, seems a bit nicer. But whatever I get is cool, gotta pay for those pizzas somehow

AV Ryan

It honestly does and it fucking sucks Yeah, money does make the world go round

Georgie Ryan

Unfortunately

AV Ryan

Yeah fuck capitalism

Georgie Ryan

Yeah

You have any weekend plans?

AV Ryan

I’m hitting the outer town with El but that’s about it You?

Georgie Ryan

No plans yet

Probably gonna check some of this stuff out, these events they got going on

AV Ryan

How many events do they have going? It seems like it's been a lot already

Georgie Ryan

I think there's at least one a day? For this entire week at least

I saw something about exercises and silent disco and lasertag

AV Ryan

Is there a fun one tomorrow?

Georgie Ryan

It's lots of classes

Improv, gym, and communication

AV Ryan

They don’t sound like fun

Georgie Ryan

Right?

There's laser tag on Sunday though. That's promising

AV Ryan

We should all do that

Georgie Ryan

Right? I think so too

I can suggest it after we find Elisa her nightlight!

AV Ryan

Sounds good to me

Georgie Ryan

Awesome

Georgie Ryan

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMdWL6equ/

AV Ryan

That’s awesome!

AUGUST

Georgie Ryan

Did you hear back from the forms, AV?

AV Ryan

Of course not

Georgie Ryan

Damn.

AV Ryan

Honestly, I’m not even surprised. It’s how they always do. Especially since I’ve been inactive for over a year.

Georgie Ryan

Doesn't sound very fair to me. If it's your right, then it's your right.

I'm sorry AV, I hope it works out

AV Ryan

It is what it is. The next step is a phone call I don’t want to make

Georgie Ryan

Want me to pretend to be you?

AV Ryan

Would you?

Georgie Ryan

Of course!

AV Ryan

Okay but next week, I’m sick of thinking about it right now

Georgie Ryan

No problemmm!

How's school then? And the classes you picked?

AV Ryan

I’ll be honest, I’m not paying much attention. You?

Georgie Ryan

I got notes

And one of the professors looks good

But that's it

[your-dietician]

Our breakdown from the most exciting day in tennis

New Post has been published on https://tattlepress.com/tennis/our-breakdown-from-the-most-exciting-day-in-tennis/

Our breakdown from the most exciting day in tennis

It was the premier tennis day of the year. On Monday, all 16 players left in the Wimbledon singles draw took the court.

An exciting lineup without question, but we admit, it was a challenge to follow all the action. But not to worry, if you missed anything, we had you covered from first ball to last.

Here’s a snapshot of everything that went down Monday at the All England Club, courtesy of Courtney Nguyen and Greg Garber. 

Ajla Tomljanovic def. Emma Raducanu, 6-4, 3-0 ret

Key takeaway: After a close opening set, Raducanu, the 18-year-old Brit, was forced to retire from their match. She appeared to be struggling to breathe and went off court before retiring. Tomljanovic showed her veteran mettle late in the first set. Raducanu was fired up and the No.1 Court crowd was right there with her every swing and fist pump. She had her chances. With Tomljanovic serving at 4-4, Raducanu had two break points come and go before Tomljanovic held serve. Then, with Raducanu serving at 4-5, Tomljanovic played a physical game – there were two 10-shot rallies, one 21-shot lung-buster and a 20-shot back-breaker – to save three game points and ultimately break for the set.

Raducanu remains a name to watch. It was a heartbreaking way for her Cinderella run to end, but the win was well-earned by Tomljanovic, who at 28, is into her first major quarterfinal.

Quotable: “As for the quarterfinal, I wouldn’t say I didn’t believe in my career I would ever get it, but just the way my season was,” Tomljanovic said. “The year before I had a lot of heartbreaking moments where I thought this was my week, against Simona, Garbiñe, Sloane a long time ago. All of a sudden everything felt really far from me even though I did feel like I’m playing well just because mentally those matches took a little bit of a toll. It got to me a little bit. It got in my head.

“But I had to put my head down and keep working and not think about those matches, think in a positive way. It’s not easy.”

What’s next: Tomljanovic takes on No.1 Ashleigh Barty. This will be the first all-Aussie meeting in a Slam quarterfinal since 1980 Wimbledon, when Evonne Goolagong Cawley defeated Wendy Turnbull in straight sets.

No.25 Angelique Kerber def. No.20 Coco Gauff, 6-4, 6-4

Key takeaway: The 2018 Champion is on a mission. Kerber, a former No.1, has found a new level over the past two weeks, starting with her run to the Bad Homburg title the week before Wimbledon and now booking her first major quarterfinal since winning the title here three years ago.

In a battle between the oldest player remaining in the draw and the youngest, Kerber played a veteran match; there was wind to manage and a talented 17-year-old to solve. The Centre Court crowd was vocally behind the American.  Kerber, 33, kept her head and took her chances. She won four of five break points (and saved four of six), finishing with 22 winners to 20 unforced errors.

Quotable: “I really enjoy to play on grass,” Kerber said. “I think this is always really special for me. Playing two tournaments in Germany starting the grass-court season like this, then winning my tournament in Germany, playing in front of the crowd again, this give me again, new energy to go out there and enjoy my tennis. I really worked hard in the last few months. Being able now to playing matches like this, winning close matches, going out there and enjoying it, feeling my tennis, it’s always a good sign.”

What’s next: Kerber will face Karolina Muchova for a spot in her fifth Wimbledon semifinal. The German has won their two previous meetings, both on hard courts.  

Viktorija Golubic def. No.23 Madison Keys, 7-6 (3), 6-3

Key takeaway: It’s been a remarkable transformation for the 28-year-old from Switzerland. In her 18th Grand Slam singles main-draw event, she and that pure one-hand backhand are through to a first major quarterfinal; her previous best was the third round to years ago at Wimbledon. Hard to believe Golubic failed to qualify earlier this year at the Australian Open and lost in the first round at Roland Garros. Golubic has now won eight of her past nine matches on grass.

Viktorija Golubic’s march to her 1st #Wimbledon quarterfinal:

d. Kudermetova 36 61 11-9 d. Collins 62 60 d. Brengle 62 61 d. Keys 76 63

Faces Karolina Pliskova next. Won their only prior meeting, at Fed Cup in 2016, 36 64 64. pic.twitter.com/atVftZIPMO

— WTA Insider (@WTA_insider) July 5, 2021

Quotable: “Yeah, I feel like especially mentally that I feel that I am more confident in my skills and actually realizing more what I can do on court,” Golubic said.” So while I’m playing, I think I can just be more focused on my part of the game. It’s more like to really be more clear in your head, like what your skills are and how you want to play.”

What’s next: A match against No.8 Karolina Pliskova, who has quietly been working her way through the draw without dropping a set. Golubic won the only match between them, coming back from a set and 2-4 down in a 2016 Fed Cup semifinal, but that was in Switzerland and on a hardcourt.

No.19 Karolina Muchova def. No.30 Paula Badosa, 7-6 (6), 6-4

Key takeaway: The 24-year-old from the Czech Republic, playing in only her second Wimbledon singles main draw, is through to her second quarterfinal. This after reaching the semifinals at the Australian Open back in February, where she beat No.1 Ashleigh Barty along the way.

Muchova and Badosa played a fairly even match. Badosa was up 3-0 in the first set and held a break of serve until 5-2. But Muchova turned it around, winning three straight games before prevailing in a taut tiebreaker. In the end, Muchova played a little cleaner, finishing the match with 24 unforced errors, six fewer than Badosa.  

Quotable: “I’m focusing mostly on the Grand Slams and on big events,” Muchova said. “So definitely that’s where I’m trying to be the most focused and going for it. I didn’t play that many tournaments this year, so I can’t really tell [my level], because I was struggling with injuries and everything. Yeah, for now it’s going good and I appreciate it.”

What’s next: Two years ago, Muchova lost to Elina Svitolina here in the quarterfinals. Now she’ll be looking to take the next step – and raise her career Wimbledon record to 9-1 – against Angelique Kerber.

No.1 Ashleigh Barty def. No.14 Barbora Krejcikova, 7-5, 6-3

Key takeaway: In a battle between the No.1 and No.2 players in the Porsche Race to Shenzhen, Barty, the only former junior champion left in the draw, ended Krejcikova’s 15-match winning streak. Barty won her 32nd match of the year (only Ons Jabeur and Aryna Sabalenka have more). She is now 11-1 this year against Top 20 players. 

Quotable: “An incredibly tough match,” Barty said. “I was excited for the challenge today. Just happy to come through in the end. Feel like I found some pretty good stuff when I needed it most, which is great. I love coming out here and testing myself against the best in the world, and there’s certainly no place I’d rather be at the moment.”

What’s next: Since winning the 2019 French Open, Barty has gone 0-for-5 in majors. This year, the 25-year-old Australian lost in the quarterfinals of the Australian and retired from her second-round match at Roland Garros. Given that Aryna Sabalenka is the only other Top 10 player left in the draw, this is a huge opportunity for Barty to win her second Grand Slam singles title.

No.8 Karolina Pliskova def. Liudmila Samsonova, 6-2, 6-3

Key takeaway: Pliskova has to appreciate the irony. The Czech’s 230-week streak inside the Top 10 ended on the first Monday at Wimbledon. So what does she do? The 29-year-old quietly makes her way to her first Wimbledon quarterfinal and first major quarterfinal since making the 2019 Australian Open semifinals.

Pliskova has had a rocky relationship with the grass at the All England Club, even though she’s had great success on grass. She’s a two-time Eastbourne champion but has never replicated those results at Wimbledon. Pliskova has not faced a Top 50 opponent yet, but she’s been serving better than she has all season. She fired 10 aces in both her first and fourth rounds – and has not lost a set.

Quotable: “Super happy that I made [the quarterfinals] in singles, because I had the last eight only in doubles, which I thought is horrible,” Pliskova said. “So now finally it’s my last Grand Slam which I was missing to go to quarters.”

What’s next: Pliskova will face either Madison Keys or Viktorija Golubic.

No.21 Ons Jabeur def. No.7 Iga Swiatek, 5-7, 6-1, 6-1 

Key takeaway: Coming off the two fantastic sets of tennis she played to beat Garbiñe Muguruza on Center Court in the last round, Jabeur showed no signs of a letdown against Swiatek. This should have been a straight-sets win for the Tunisian, who dominated the opening set before Swiatek played a resplendent three consecutive games to steal it. Down a set with her first Wimbledon quarterfinal on the line, the 26-year-old Jabeur played free and loose. She served at 70% in the final two sets and was 7 for 7 on break points in the match, dominating through the final two sets. With the win, Jabeur becomes the first Arab – man or woman – to make the Wimbledon quarterfinals since 1974.

READ: Kerber stops Gauff, Jabeur blazes past Swiatek to reach Wimbledon quarters

Jabeur is now 10-1 on grass this season, having won her first WTA title in Birmingham. Her only loss came to eventual champion Jelena Ostapenko in three sets in Eastbourne. She has beaten three consecutive major champions – Swiatek, Muguruza and Venus Williams – to reach her second career major quarterfinal.

Quotable: “Actually I got congratulated by Roger after my match, which was amazing,” Jabeur said. “I think now I’m good in my tennis career [laughter]. He was very nice. He took the time to say congrats. That inspires me a lot and gives me the hunger to win more.”

No.2 Aryna Sabalenka def. No.18 Elena Rybakina, 6-3, 4-6, 6-3

Key takeaway: In her 15th Grand Slam singles appearance, the 23-year-old from Belarus advanced to her first quarterfinal. She entered the tournament as the only Top 20 ranked player not to reach a major quarterfinal and now she has a chance to make her first Grand Slam semifinal. Rybakina, whose serve had been broken only once in three matches, was broken five times.  

Sabalenka is tied with Jabeur for the most match-wins on tour this season (33). Sabalenka is one of only three Top 18 seeds still left in the draw. 

Quotable: “Of course I’m really happy I finally broke this wall,” Sabalenka said. “Yeah, I’m in the quarterfinals. But this is not my final goal. I’m trying to be happy, but at the same time be focused and be ready for the next one because it’s also not easy match.”

What’s next: Sabalenka will face Jabeur on Tuesday, with both women looking to make their first major semifinal. They split their previous two meetings. Sabalenka won their most recent match in straight sets on the hardcourts of Abu Dhabi in January.

  Source link

[fmdxjerome]

hello people from old and new! naomi is back in action with her son jerome. i’ve been stuck in my sisters house for the last weeks of my absence because she went on vacation and i had to take care of a sick rabbit who peed everywhere. i might have a disease now at the amount he bit me but what can you do. im joking. you might ask “but naomi doesnt your sister have wifi” yes she do but i’m an anxious wreck so spending my days on a first floor apartment  with my sister on the other side of the world w an infected foot had me fucke d upppp boiii but now i’m back in my own home and my sister + her boyfriend are safely home!! foot all fine!! and everyone is calm again!! so!! i can return with a good heart. i’ll be sliding in the dms of the people who bear emoticon’ed me 600 years ago and bc i suck w introducing myself to new people i’ll just hi!!!!! i think when i wake up i’m gonna do a “bio reading” marathon as i write bc i need to appreciate. also shit i need more threads wow i suck might see me replying to some open starters and def need to get back to plotting bc there are some people i’ve been dying to thread with ;^;

its like 6am now so i might b heading 2 bed now but under the cut there will be a reintroduction to jerome (one i promised in januari i believe) as im rewriting his bio (no major things change really its just minor things nd its time for an upgrade) so yes! hello (ims will come tomorrow as well ;3;)

also fact. mullet daddy jaebum is jerome rn dont drag him dont @ him its gone before you know it. probs after idolized its a look tho wow i love- a chic farmer (... the short bangs are tragic tho jerome honey i kno u liked them on wren but ur not wren. jerome: but i- me: no. this this not this jerome: :( ok fine me: fuego 

anyway before i pass out here is reintroduction. the triggers are; adoption, racism themes??? like yeah ok!! apologize if this is shit. hope everyone is having a good day though you all are great!

Jerome Gauthier aka Yuddy

-Anti idol

-Has an okay reputation but that’s because he’s smart about things.

-BC eyeing him tho *eyes fake friends with good reputation for him to hang out with* (hmu for fake friend plots. funny the person w the best rep of all actually likes jerome. bless jisoos christ. guess that praying on knees worked out in the end huh jerome. /dont/ sainthood is waiting)

-Talented™. (ask him to write songs for you) (Actually have a few songs in my library i want him to write but not sing so *eyes*)

-Passionate as fuck don’t mess with him in the studio (passionate all over tbh)

-Adopted and in search of his bloodlines

-Hoe but not really

-Actually, scrap that. Nicknames him JerHOEme

-Is actually lovely

-But acts like a shit

-Slips up and is soft to people sometimes before being a complete and utter asshole the next second

-bc soft jerome whOMST i only know deMON

-Suave Fuckboy who’s nonchalant about everything

-French™

-Will call you baby at some point in your life

-Signature smirk

-Egotistic???? Narcissistic??? a lil bit don’t stroke his ego

-Secretive™. not much info on his time in france

-Secretly a dad without children (except for his actual biological son insoo aka chorizo sausage who he goes to play ball with- i mean work on songs in the studio. seriously catch him picking up his son from soccer practice i mean shit no i mean- ok insoo is really his son dont fight me on this.)

-And also has a daughter an Oriental shorthair cat called Edith who he is so soft with he kicks out girls to cuddle with her. (one meow and he’s home)

- we support WISH hating jerome in this household. please people who have girls in WISH dont let them like him (or be a rebel and go against the mothers wishes but you’ve been warned)

-Dont let him get in your pants too like ask wren you dont want that (or i mean with the list of kinks i peeped maybe idk who am i to say what your muse wants or does not want idk im just protecting people from satan)

-Unlikely he’ll get in any pants now anyway tho bc he a proud shopper at papa juliens pizza and y’all some other brand type ish domino lookin asses NAH *throws hands up* rome’s in the house (no but guys. this is his soulmate THIS IS HIM. dISgUStiNG- )

-In 2016 interview took him out of context and it looks like he hates all idol rappers but is not true. He just doesn’t like companies making rap out to be like this thing you can do if you’re pretty and you can’t sing and he doesn’t like it when said pretty idols know nothing of it. he gets the grind but will side eye (benjy nd jerome already have a rivalry bc of this shit thank u interviewer)

-Dating scandals?? EHH. He almost had one with a Japanese model called Momo in the beginning of his career but BC did well of spinning them as friends and he legit had one with his ex last october which?????????? shit she touched his *spoiler* and it was *spoiler* . BC about to ban him from fashion shows damn. yoonah and him have to go to paris fashion week quick

-BC has yet to force him into a relationship tho. but damn he gonna be angry when that ever happens yoo. 

-Studied to become a cinematographer. Now is annoying as fuck during recording MV’s bc he butts into everything (BUT thats why his his mvs so AESTHETIC. eye for beauty bois)

-Holler at ya boi if you want a nice mv he’s involved like that

-Also to the girls who have been in an MV with Jerome.. know he probably flirted with you between takes bc during he’s grade a professionalism but he still a ho

-Actual catlady no questions asked (he feeds stray cats and gets cut up by edith when she smells other cats on him rip)

-Actual wife material no questions asked (to quote the great Halit Yilmaz during that time Jerome stood in the kitchen for hours making baklava and other Turkish treats for Halit’s Eid al-Fitr: “Shit, Jerome if you were a girl i’d marry you in a heartbeat.” and its true. we would ALL marry jerome. who says no is lying. )

-Smooth™

-Ok the ego thing btw its weird its an act but hes weird about it dont ask

idk what else to write ok short rundown of his bio as again i’m writing a new one and i cringe every time i look at my old one. im probs forgetting a lot but EYO ITS 6AM WHO CARES

CHILDHOOD age 0 to 10

-Born to a single mom who got fucked over by a smash nd dash dad. (we side eye Ok Chanwook in this household.)

-Moms family discouraged her from taking care of him herself so putting up for adoption it is.

-Very emotional not ok mom boram cry a lot pls. (got v angry too like boi if she ever sees chanwook again he can change his name to no dick larry)

-Adopted by a French couple called Lucas and Daphné (previously named Annelies). pretty kool peeps

-JK racist assholes who fetishize jerome a lot. PLEASE. the yellow fever runs deep. take him away from them,

-Raised in a small town in France and knew 0 Asians growing up. so thats nice

-Loves his adoptive grandpa to death tho (who’s he named after u3u)

-Actually hates the rest lol

-Ok uncle Rémy pretty cool bc he laughs at teen!Jerome shit talking his parents and aunt Camille. She a sweety ;3; a bit odd but a sweety #stanauntCamille

-Basically the people on the Gauthier side and born from Jerome and Clemintine are ok, the rest is shit (except for his dad Lucas. He a Gauthier but he shit)

-Junior/Senior relationship w granpda ;3; “Pépé!!” “Junior!!” *tiny jerome swings around grandpa’s neck* LOVE

-Grandma passed when he was 9. (he loved her very much and would always show her his drawings on her bed ;-;)

-Hard time adjusting at first when he was a tiny toddler. had a lisp talking french. ;3; baby rome

-young jerome had a bad case of the abandonment issues he literally held onto his dads leg for like 30 minutes before the teacher finally peeled him away from him. my smol boi

-Elephants. remember this. is important. /sob

-TLDR; biological mom didnt want to loose him. adoptive parents and dad are fucks. grandpa is kool. jerome had a good childhood until he didnt. thank u ignorance

TEEN YEARS age 10 to 20

-middle school very nice

-j FUCKING KKKKK EMO JEROME INBOUNDDDD

-kids are mean. teens are mean. young!jerome v lonely

-honestly he had no friends. except for like maybe this one kid on his sport called mattheo but he kinda a weeb so uhhhh ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

-the time comes that he feels uncomfortable with everything korean. he already learned korean along side french and english when he was growing up but now distances himself from further learning. he clings to french culture a lot and even to this day he refers to himself as french and european, and rarely refers to himself as korean or asian.

-feels disconnected from both though. its like.. his parents took his korean culture away from him by using it for their own amusement. it was not his to have basically. and french- a lot of people around him give the vibe he’s not “allowed” to call himself fully french. they see him as korean, korean-french but never just french. he feels very misunderstood. lack of identity and just not fitting in

-around this time (or earlier i’m musing still) his cousin Antonin (moms side) kind of fell out on him. like. wow. not good. fucked jerome up a lil. (issues intensify)

-inferiority complex inbound/ is he ok? no he isnt. he starts writing to get his emotions out.

-Blessed Freddy rolled in teen jerome’s life like: guess we need to do history homework together jerome: aren’t you gonna make a ‘do my homework bc you’re asian’ joke freddy: why would i jerome:

-they bond over music, freddy is the one who gets him serious about getting into it (we thank our lord freddy for this gift of life we call singer/songwriter jerome. pray to freddy 10 times a day *srry jisoos christ but ur out*)

-literally young jerome would be a great soundcloud artist in this day and age. he was like joji meets rei brown with more of an rnb tinge. he liked ambient because it calmed him.

-in his old bio thats still up bc im a slow writer his old name was some dumb shit like l.only DUMB its romeles now (get it.. jeROME LESlie gauthier. im smart)

-OK IM GONNA GO QUICKER NOW

-eMO FOR A LONG TIME BC OF LONELINESS AND OTHERING FREDDY IS HIS BEACON OF HOPE WE LOVE FREDDY IN THIS HOUSEHOLD!!!!!!!

-had a big ass fall out with his parents when he was around 15? was like “UHHH FUCK Y’ALL” and moved in with his grandpa (he was very disrespectful like damn boy but you know what. i support)

-best decision of his life because grandpa v lonely after his wife died and Jerome^2 is… so soft.

-Jerome dancing/singing to old tunes and being engrossed with old movies

-Learning how to cook ;3;

-I mean bc his middle and highschool were in Laval he spend a lot of his time w his grandpa already so he already had a bed and ;-; #jerome^2

-Halit rolls into his life. Braces, huge smile, lil prepubescent stash ohmygod. My child.

-BLANC is born. Freddy/Jerome/Halit’s musical trio. Stan the Three Musketeers

-Found his first best friend and a purpose in Freddy. Found a home in Halit. (sob)

-Finds solace in rnb and hiphop. People start noticing him because of it. Writes songs and performs them in café’s. Found his niche. 15 to 19 where his “best”  years

-THE BIG MOVE. After a concerned halit mom, a proud freddy mom and a “WHAT THE FUCK JEROME NO DONT GO” jerome mom they pack their bags and PARIS HERE WE COME

-Enter ex who haunts his life, Seo Yumi aka Marie (now model, v pretty, makes me cry)

-Spots her in the summer doing yoga in the park and boi he an assman so he got fucked up (jk he saw her face and was like wHAT love at first sight

-enrolls in film school, meets her there again and wow falls in love hard like wow calm down boy

-Dating~~~v possessive not good at ALL cALM DOWN JEROME

-ok he got his issues nd marie was the first one who openly listened to his problems and understood and made him appreciate his korean heritige bc she’s korean and showed him cultural aspects without the gross fetishizing that came with his parents and he just- he got intense ok. he already got a v intense personality so- still not good tho he needs to dial it down

-she thought so too and like after a year she was !!!! what the fuck. she is not one for serious relationships but jerome was like ehhh why not in the beginning its v nice to hear nd be seen as the most beautiful ok but then it got suffocating but instead of breaking up with him she kept him around. he a safe haven ya know. reliable. someone to built on later. *i wanna say she also didnt break up w him because his emo stories but marie,,, eh...* (funny tho like she got a thing for bad boys so she just “this is the fifth time you called me beautiful just degrade me lil like choke me idk” and jerome just “w-why would i do that you’re beautiful i dont want to hurt you” ah *looks into the future* ohhowthetableshaveturned.mp4 )

-Marie cheated on him the second she got the chance which was when jerome went to america w his bros

-Got offered a job as a songwriter when in ny. Wouldnt think he’d take it but after getting kicked out of school for beating the shit out of the guy marie cheated on him with and with marie out of the picture nothing held him back from starting a new life.

-TLDR; emo era. silver era. emo era 2 emo harder

ADULTHOOD age 20 to now

-Seoul make way for the rise of YUDDY™

-the name yuddy is from the film days of being wild. the character is kinda yuddy-ish too so he saw the film again and yep. thats my name

-Fuck_love.mp3

-Visits his orphanage. they like “nah boi u aint got no papers boi”

-Parents can give him access to his birthmother btw, aren’t doing it lol

-EMO

-Drinks. Sleeps around. Gets a reputation. You kno how it is. (gr8 ride tho. highly recommend. 5 out of 5 stars on yelp)

-SMASH ND DASH. Chanwook is that u??????

-One girl who he got with multiple times reminded him of Marie tho and that fucked him up for a bit (PSST ITS A PLOT WINK SO IF YA GIRL OF AGE IN THE 2013′S HMU BC ITS DRAMATIC HE GHOSTED THE SHIT OUT OF HER)

-Writes a lot of songs, a few for BC (knight baes). BC like *eye emoji* who dat boi who him iz

-Gets sign w BCreate and is like eyy life pretty good

-but lmao he debut and oh who’s that pretty girl promoting that lipstick?? oh.. its marie ;3;

-imfine.jpeg

-Joins main label and literally joins w a blessing stream limbo on spotify

-wgm era was a great era of jerome lmty his hair was great, shared cute personal things, manager was happy, slept with his best friend, was married to a sweet beautiful girl ya know the good stuff  👍 no im not crying you are

-triple fantasy era was awful we dont talk about that he looked like his brother and i’m still emotional about him wow. 

-instagram is a great song

-Interviewer: u mention an ex in ur song tell me more Jerome: *SWEATS*  

-Marie: my short hair DOES look pretty thank u babe ur red hair was cute too <3<3

-The fact she linked to him now is spook

-But ok he still flirty, still daring, still yuddy™ but definitely less of the whole “sleeping around” thing now bc he… he uhh closetoyou.mp3

TLDR; he turned into his dad but romeo is rising AND HE IS SCARED!!!!!

also never forget jerome is the messiest king in this ok non y’all are as messy as him. he fucked his ex’s friend oK THERE IS NOTHING MORE MESSY. dONT COME FOR HIS CROWN

[unconqueredfun]

Hey ya’ll. I made a grand daiklave. Also tumblr killed my formatting I made in the write up and I’m not redoing it. But maybe add some more decorations.

Stormrune Blue jade grand daiklave Artifact rating 4 Attunement: 5m Type: Heavy (+1 ACC, +14 DMG, +0 DEF, OVW 6) Tags: Lethal, Melee, Reaching, Balanced, Two-Handed Hearthstone slot(s): 2 Era: Age of Sorrows

From the diary and collected notes of Peleps Liao Wen, maker and first wielder.

Sun’s day the 22nd of descending fire. Realm Year 762.

        Today marks the forty-eighth day since I came to the Blessed isle. It has been a very rainy day, I am not one to complain however. I quite like it. However I find it noteworthy to point out as it gave me great inspiration for the making of a great blade. As I visited the Dragon’s footprint temple to study its ancient architecture, a storm rolled in overhead. As I walked around the temple under my umbrella, studying how the ancient constructors funnelled the rainwater so neatly into the moat and ponds lightning starts to thunder overhead. I found myself upon a bridge of the moat overlooking the greenery and the twin waterfalls of the Blessed Tiger and Blue Eyed Doe rivers when suddenly lightning struck an old pavillion. The old green copper spines of the roof glowed red hot and hissed in the rain as it melted and ran down the water spouts made of stone in the shape of dragon-maws.

        I ran over to check and do what I could to save the pavillion from collapsing, I found that the copper had solidified and looked a lot like lightning bolts of their own, forking over shingles and out of the pillars created by the fall. They had splashed down down onto the cobblestone into a puddle, droplets cascading out of it shaped like dragon-tongue letters, bursting out of it. Much to my surprise however I found that despite that the spines were no longer there, the structure made from the melted copper and hardened by the rain again carried the shingles and roof just fine. The bolts carried the rainwater out of the dragon-maws and onto the stone and into the moat just fine as well. I find it hard to appreciably describe what I saw to give it any justice. I feel like I can only describe it as seeing the elements in harmony with one and another in a tiny scale.

        Seeing the lightning carrying the rain and becoming a focal point to carry the structure upon itself gave me ideas for a blade. Upon which I aim to contain this harmony as caused by lightning into a blade that functions in harmony with its own design, where its own elements become a mighty dragon in combination with each other. I think the letters that the copper spelled out in flawed strokes would be ideal for this, but to make inscriptions in jade as fine as brush strokes will be a great challenge, but nevertheless I believe this will hold the power of lightning for the blade. Together this sword will move quicker than its peers and fork into many avenues of approach for the strikes.

Mercury's day the 12th of resplendent wood Realm Year 763.

        My toil with this blade has reached an end with this blade and it is a mighty fine one if I am to be allowed to boast. I do not know if blades have been made a like it, but I find my design to be very interesting. I can hold it in several ways and the way it's formed allows me to switch between my hand to hand techniques, even if they are a little inelegant at times, and the greatsword between heartbeats and without losing any of the defensive posture I desire.

        My own affinity for lightning and storms however may have bleed more into the sword than I had intended. Nevertheless, it has created a versatile greatsword that carries the unrelenting fury of a storm and the alacrity of lightning. I'm sure it would be a great boon to my immediate future as war looms between my home and invaders from the further north.

Attunement benefit: Stormsurge Slash unlocks at no extra cost. Additionally Stormrune’s design allows the wielder to easily hold onto it, in the heat of battle she suffers no penalties for making unarmed attacks while wielding Stormrune and do not need to drop it even during a grapple. Additionally unarmed attacks made without artifact weapons gain +1 overwhelming that does not stack with charms.

Stormsurge Slash Cost: 1m Essence: 1 Duration: Instant. Keywords: Withering-only, Stackable Type: Supplemental Prereq: None Each slash energizes Stormrune. The runes along the blade light up with bright blue and electrical sparks travels down the furrow between the two sides of the blade.

Every successful withering attack made supplemented by this increases the withering damage by 1 of Stormrune until the next turn. This effect stacks up to (lower of essence or 3) times and each consecutive use extends the duration until the end of the next turn.

Dragon Thunder Might Cost: 3m+ Essence: 2 Duration: Instant Keywords: Decisive-Only Type: Reflexive Prereq: Stormsurge Slash When making a decisive attack with Stormrune the she may transfer as many threshold successes as she has charges of Stormsurge Slash built up. She may activate this after the attack roll but When three charges are spent in this manner the decisive damage gains double 10s.

At Essence 3, the wielder may activate Dragon Thunder Might during a clash by spending another two motes before the attack roll, to release an electric shock from the runes of the blade. For each charge being spent she removes one success from the opponent’s successes.

Lightning Flash Crash Cost: 2m 1i Essence: 2 Duration: Instant Keywords: Perilous. Withering-Only Type: Reflexive Prereq: Stormsurge Slash After missing a withering attack, the wielder can attempt a follow up attack making a secondary withering attack using an unarmed jab holding Stormrune with her other hand. This secondary attack takes into account the onslaught penalty occurred by the original strike. If this unarmed strike lands, it automatically extends the effect of Stormsurge Slash until next turn.

The attack is considered to be mundane unarmed for the purposes of damage and accuracy. But may inherit the protection or unbreakability of an artifact if a defensive effect calls for it.

Special activation rule: This cannot follow Thunder Follows Lightning or One Weapon Two Blows strikes.

Thunder Follows Lightning Cost: +1m +1i Essence: 3 Duration: Permanent Keywords: Withering-only Type:  Permanent Prereq: One weapon two blows, Lightning Flash Crash This permanently upgrades One Weapon Two Blows  and allows the wielder activate regardless of whether or not she passed her victim in the initiative order, as long as she hit her target but not crashed them, by paying an additional mote and one initiative. This attack may only be withering.

Coil of the Stormdragon Cost: 5m 1wp Essence: 3 Duration: Instant Keywords: Perilous Type: Reflexive Prereq: Thunder Follows Lightning After successfully crashing an opponent with a withering strike. The wielder may forgo the initiative gained by the damage and grapple the victim as if she had successfully landed a grapple gambit. For the control roll she gains automatic successes equal to Stormsurge Slash charges in the blade and an additional number of dice equal to the victim’s onslaught penalty.

Thunderbolt Hold Stance Cost: 4m 2i Essence: 2 Duration: Until next turn Keywords: None Type: Reflexive Prereq: Lightning Flash Crash Charging her speed and reflexes from the energy of the blade, the wielder flows her attacks in harmony with defense as the elements remain in harmony with each other. At the end of her assault the wielder may reflexively take a full defense action by grabbing a hold of the back end of the daiklave and using it similarly to a staff or spear.

Lightning Animated Blade Cost: 2m (+2i) Essence: 1 Duration: Instant Keywords: Perilous Type: Simple Prereq: Stormsurge Slash, Lightning Fingers (merit) Aligned with the element that Stormrune carries within. The wielder can use their own ability to manifest lightning and use it to charge the blade. After a jolt, the blade keeps its current charges of Stormsurge Slash active until the end of the next turn.

Alternatively she can attempt to animate the blade further by spending 2 initiative and roll her intelligence + occult for lightning fingers . If she succeeds at this it adds another Stormsurge Slash charge to the blade and extends the duration to the end of the next turn.

Heaven Cleaves the Mountain Cost: 5m 3i (1wp) Essence: 4 Duration: Instant Keywords: Decisive-Only Type: Reflexive Prereq: Dragon Thunder Might, Thunder Follows Lightning The wielder raises the dragonblade above her head and brings it down with thunderous might upon her foe. As the attack is dealt, Stormrune lets loose a thunderous crash in a flash of light that blinds and deafens anyone present save for the wielder upto medium range. Significant opponents receive a -3 dice penalty to all non-movement related actions for a number of turns equal to the amount of charges of Stormsurge Slash expended by Dragon Thunder Might to a minimum of 1. Trivial opponents gains this penalty for the rest of the scene. If it deals at least one level of damage, Heaven Cleaves the Mountain knocks the victim prone from the force of the blow.

Heaven Cleaves the Mountain may only be used once per scene but may be reset by building up to three charges of Stormsurge Slash and landing a decisive attack that deals at least three levels of damage.

Special Activation Rule: When a melee withering attack crashes an opponent she may activate this reflexively. If it follows One Weapon Two Blows or Thunder Follows Lightning the cost is increased to one temporary point of willpower.

Thunder Tempest Burst Cost: 10m 4i 3a  Essence: 5 Duration: Instant Keywords: Decisive-only, perilous Type: Reflexive Prereq: Heaven Cleaves the Mountain. Bringing herself in harmony with the runes of her blade and the storms kept within, the wielder makes use of its power in one tremendous burst of speed and power. The wielders makes a fierce uppercut that sends her target soaring and then leaps after. Where the wielder is seen slashing with unrelenting ferocity over a short moments in the air until bringing herself and the victim down to the ground like a lightning bolt hurtling towards the ground. From the impact excess lightning arcs and forks from Stormrune into any unlucky being that happen to be nearby.

When at 15 points of initiative she may choose to use an unarmed attack from which she unleashes her tempest, declared before the attack roll. If this attack succeeds the target is launched up into short range with the wielder and Stormrune in hot pursuit, but no damage is rolled. The threshold successes instead become bonus dice on a withering attack made with Stormrune where the target suffers the prone penalty to their defense. The damage from this attack is instantly rolled with the initiative as decisive damage as the wielder brings sword and target down to the ground. If this damage is avoided fully, the target takes short fall damage instead. Once completed Stormrune unleashes a one time environmental effect difficulty 5 damage 5L that afflicts everyone in close range as lightning chains and forks through everyone nearby. Only the original victim and the wielder are not affected by this.

Special activation rule: If the target is grappled then wielder may use this as her grapple actions. It succeeds automatically as she throws the victim into the air. The remaining rolls of control is added as bonus dice on the attack roll and then proceeds as normal.

[fmlfpl]

Lineup Lamentations - GW2

Our Transfers, Captains, and Starting 11s for the week!

—

WALSH

TRANSFERS:

OUT: Havertz and Jota

IN (for -4 points): Bruno and Anguissa

Welp. Went from saving to hitting...such is life. As the age old adage goes, there's not better time to hit than the present.

Jota.. obviously a huge issue, on his way to livp, whatevs. That gamble didn't pay off not by a long shot. I looked around in the 6.5 and under bracket and while Podence is a guy....and I considered Foden again there...it just didn't feel right. I'm half thinking Trossard won't last for long on my team and that seems like a better spot to get Podence in if I want him so I opened my mind and looked at Kai more closely.

Realistically there are a lot of question marks around him, too many to go into here, as well as with Ziyech and Puli out the team is not at their best. I am taking an aggressive line here and getting rid rather than being patient through their easier fixtures gw3-5 so I won't really know if this was a good move until then.

Bruno is someone I've been having a hard time quitting. I seriously looked at hiding him in my GW1 team and I just want him. This move comes down to just wanting to get him more than anything else. It leaves my 11th man a fucking mess, but hey I got 10 out last week and it was fine. I've got Aubz outgoing after the whu game so I'll likely address this with a hit next week, or with my next two free transfers. I'm jamming in another premium asset so hoping that they prop up the dog shit guys at the other end of the team for the time being. Also with the Jota news into Livp it doessss kinda feel that Brewster might go soon? If that happens then suddenly this hit is just fucking brilliant and I start Brewster for the foreseeable. It's not nothing, altho it could be nothing, but just chattin. Just chattin fpl.

GK:

Ryan (new)

Newcastle looked good against West Ham last weekend so the clean feels a bit more tenuous than I had probably thought before GW1 started off. That said, Brighton are a good solid outfit and I am pretty happy with Ryan. Would never be surprised at a clean in this fixture, so hopefully it comes in.

DEF:

Dier (sou)

Everyone suddenly shitting all over Spurs but whatevs. Mou will probably go set up to park against Ralph and honestly I feel like Spurs are a good bet for a clean home or away against any non top 4 side in the division. It's just how they set up and after Southampton were a little off it against us last weekend maybe they continue to struggle and their press is fucked up with another possible miss in Redderz. Dier feels fine and happy I have him.

Shaw (CRY)

Pretty nervous about owning this thicc boi since it seems like they are actively shopping for a LB but as of this moment he's their starter. He played in that friendly thing against Villa the other day so hopefully he's ready to start. Hopefully we keep Wilf on the other side of the pitch so he doesn't get a card, but whatevs. If Manu don't sign a left back in the window he still feels like a good option. And if they do, and don't sign a CB, then I guess I can always laterally swap to Lindy even tho I hate him. Bottom line I still like the 5m price on Manu cleans as I expect them to get many this season.

Trent (che)

As we all saw, was being overloaded and a bit off the pace last game against Bielsaball. Not much to say about Trent here. Tough fixture, but it's Trent. Clean would be surprising but he's always got the shout for attacking returns. Steady hold.

MID:

Aubameyang (WHU)

Nice goal in the opening game against Fulham and another nice fixture against a team that is in disarray. These two games is why he's in my team and he didn't disappoint GW1 so hopefully that carries on into this one.

Salah (che)

The form man...just needs to remember to shoot on sight with the opponents not having a functional goalkeeper between the sticks and he should do just fine. Kinda feeling like Livp are going to disassemble Franklins team this weekend so feeling more hopeful for Mo points than I did a couple weeks ago when I saw this fixture on the slate.

Trossard (new)

Important game for this boy in my team and for what my thoughts are with him moving forward. I didn't select him thinking he'd be a medium term hold...more of a punty OOP cheap guy who I could throw out for a couple and then reassess who emerges but he might play his way into my side for a while yet. Newcastle far from convincing defensively with that 442 so if Bruce plays something similar I imagine that it could be open with some chances for Brighton in this one. I'm hopeful here and good for the boy to have bagged one in the opening game. Go on tr0ss.

Andre-Frank Zambo Anguissa (lee)

A man deserving of his full name to be noted here. Honestly got hot for Zambo after watching his cameo at the end of the Arse game after knowing about him from his time in Liga last year coming back from loan. He started and played 60odd midweek so I'm a little little bit nervous if he's ready for 90 but I'm hoping so since I just bought him in. He's classy and I like him. Probably no more than a 2 pointer kind of guy but he might have a little bit of license to get to the edge of the box and be an extra guy if he's playing with Reed and/or Lemina or some shit.

If he's still seeing the pitch in my fpl team in a couple of weeks...well I'll have been fucking up...so hopefully this is the first and last start he makes for my team :) Should be a nice first shield on the bench, though, which will probably be useful given that my bench is a laugh riot.

Bruno Fernandes (CRY)

He's in and I can now watch Manu games without persisting feelings of dread. Good fpl pick, good player. Long may the pens floweth.

FWD:

Werner (LIV)

No matter how fucked up Franklin makes the team and sets it up to fail one thing is certain from watching the Brighton game to me...this kid will get points. He's going to be a danger man all season and it would take a lot for me to remove him from my team it seems. Happy to hold him while they wait for the unfit lads to get fit etc. Good guy Timo. Love him.

Calvert-Lewin (WBA)

One of my better picks pre-gw1 happy to have him in for their nice little mini run of fixtures here. West Brom will be a lot better with Ivan but luckily he won't play this weekend. I'd be surprised if Everton don't score 3 or more so when that happens usually DCL will have something to show from it. Looks like a nice pick and a nice hold who I don't have to worry about or spend time thinking about.

BENCH:

Hide your eyes..

Brewster (che), Mitchell (mun), Ferguson(mun)

CAP:

Aubameyang (WHU)

Not really in question here. Give me the good guy against the bad team - not really much to think about here. Go on Aubz.

—

ALON

TRANSFERS:

OUT: Alli

IN: James Rodríguez

Did this move before we even Friday My Life’d to beat the Alli price drop. Duno. I knew I wanted Hamez and also knew that seeing Alli/Pulisic in my team made me want to blow my brains out for being so fucking bad and dumb.

Guess I’ll be spending FTs righting my mistakes for the first few weeks of the season and then I’ll be behind and wildcarding.... and yeeeaaaaaahhhhh rinse and repeat nightmare season incoming yet again. I suck at FPL.

GK:

McCarthy (TOT)

Meh sure whatever. It’s cleanable but unlikely. Hopefully at least gets a save point here.

DEF:

Alexander-Arnold & Robertson (che)

Good guys gettin’ forward. Maybe Thiago will allow them to get even more forward and less ball progression responsibilities..? Can see a world where Fabinho drops between the CBs and it’s almost a 3142 kinda thing. Duno. They’re great and I don’t really care about fixtures.

Justin (BUR)

Great fixture. Come on Justin do it again lad.

Shaw (CRY)

ManU’re doing everything in their power to get a new LB and fuck Shaw off (about damn time) but hopefully they fuck up all their transfer business as usual and Shaw remains the chosen one. TBD.

For now he’s a good pick and this is a great cleansheet fixture as long as Wilf isn’t running in open space against The Fridge.

MID:

Mane (che)

Mane good.

Rodriguez (WBA)

Hamez pleases me a lot. Happy to be early to the party here and hold him for a long time. AKA until I wildcard.

Pulisic (LIV)

Frank has blatantly lied in pressers before and he will lie again. I mean don’t get me wrong Pulisic is an absolute piece of shit. No question. But just hoping Frank is trying to “mind-game” Klopp (lolol) here and the Yank-cunt™ surprise starts.

FWD:

Martial (CRY)

Tony is love Tony is life.

Calvert-Lewin (WBA)

DCL made us so proud. He should be lookin to bang vs. WBA get in there Dom.

Werner (LIV)

Timo is really good. Nothing surprising at all there man. He’s just really good and I agree with Walsh he’s just gonna get points no doubt.

There’s space behind Liverpool who look to be starting slowly again at the back like last season and that’s the space that Timo will look to exploit.

BENCH:

Walker-Peters (TOT)

Probably coming in for Puli.. It’s not great but it is cleanable and he could also get an assist it’s fine. More likely is they lose 2-0 and he yellow cards Son. Can’t wait!

Reed (lee)

Smallbone (TOT)

CAP:

Martial (CRY)

Sticking with the preseason plan of capping Tony here. Go on Tone please do the things and let’s have none of the things come from Bruno assists, strictly Shaw assists :) :) :). Go on.

[rougesrant]

Premiers Finish Over The Top Shamrocks

Welcome Back Rugby! The weather was fine, the sun was shining bright as Rugby returned to the Illawarra. The opening Round of Illawarra Rugby for 2020 saw last year’s Grand Final sides Avondale and Shamrocks opposed at Gerry Cappetta Oval. Despite the long layoff the healthy crowd was exposed to a very entertaining afternoon of Rugby with no less than eleven tries laid on by two well prepared sides.

Avondale took the points for the opening Round of the Peters Woods Challenge Shield series, with a hard fought 45 to 34 win over the Rocks. After a see-sawing first forty minutes the teams went to the break even at 17 each. The Wombats laid on three tries in the closing stages of the match when it appeared that the Rocks were going to get revenge for their loss in last year’s decider as the Woonona side led 34 – 24 with ten left on the clock.

Both sides were missing players from their 2019 teams and it was clear that the long layoff had not been kind to the fitness level of both sides. However the standard of play was high and both clubs coaching staff would be pleased with the effort from their sides given the unusual nature of the offseason we have been forced to endure.

Avondale exploded from the kick-off and had their first try on the board before a minute of the match had passed. Big Prop Forward Anthony Amone found space on the left when the Rocks conceded possession from the kick-off running twenty meters to score in the Change-room corner. Within minutes the Wombats were in again when wingman Jesse Leng showed all his pace to score in the same corner off a slick Wombat backline play. With one conversion from Silipa Tuigamala, Avondale were out to a 12 – 0 lead after three minutes.

Shamrocks refused to be rattled by Avondale’s early success and with Fly-Half Tom McDevitt showing the way the Rocks posted their first points a matter of minutes later. McDevitt split the Wombat defense in center field and put Fullback Ben Ridgeway in the clear who raced forty meters to score under the posts. McDevitt converted to reduce the lead to five at 12 – 7 at the seven minute mark.

Both sides quickly settled down with play moving at pace from one end of the field to the other in an absorbing contest. Jesse Leng repeated his display of blistering pace when he scored in the same left side corner off another well worked Wombat backline maneuver for Wombats to take a 17 – 7 lead after eighteen minutes.

McDevitt impacted the game again when he put center Matt Suana through the Avondale line on half way. Suana fed midfield partner Ben Stewart who found McDevitt backing up down the middle of the field as the number ten scored under the sticks. With four minutes left to the break McDevitt goaled and on the stroke of halftime added a penalty goal to tie the scores up at 17 all.      

Avondale got the best of the early minutes of the second stanza after a string of penalties enabled them to camp in the Shamrocks half for long periods. However the tenacious style of the Rocks 2019 defense was there again as they repelled the best that the Wombats could offer. Avondale eventually broke the deadlock when Leng scored his third try down the left for the Wombats to lead again by seven at 24 – 17 after fifty minutes.

With the Wombat effort showing signs of fatigue, Shamrocks put on the next seventeen points putting themselves in what appeared to be a match winning position with ten minutes remaining. McDevitt was instrumental in much of what Shamrocks did in attack. The Fly-half found fullback Ridgeway again on the right who expertly positioned winger Tim Hawkins on a run to score in the corner. McDevitt converted and at the sixty minute mark started the backline raid that produced his side’s fourth try. Center Stewart running off McDevitt fed winger Liam Vuik on the left and the winger showed good pace to score wide out. McDevitt converted and minutes later added another penalty goal to take the Rocks to a 34 – 24 lead with eleven minutes to go.

Avondale started the match with young attacking star Allan Tuigamala on the bench. Tuigamala joined the match after the Rocks last try and brought a new lease of life to the Wombat effort as they scored three tries in seven minutes. He sparked several attacking raids before Lock Jake Kamire forced his way over the Rocks line from close range as the game went into the last ten minutes. Silipa Tuigamala converted the try and then instigated the plays that saw the Wombats steal the match from the Rocks.

An attacking midfield kick saw what a Rugby Ball can do with an horrific  right angle bounce opening up an opportunity for James Benn who secured the ball to run away and score a converted try putting Avondale back in front 38 – 34. With Avondale on the attack again in the Shamrocks quarter, Silipa Tuigamala pounced on a loose ball from Shamrocks to score and convert bringing up the final score of 45 – 34.

Given the unprecedented nature of the lead up to the belated start to the year both sets of Coaches would be pleased with their side’s efforts in this match which was an entertaining affair for a very appreciative crowd. The winners Avondale were well served by hardworking Lock Keiren Jack, Flanker Michael Malaki, No.8 Tuu Taanoa and center Nua Alone. McDevitt was a standout for Shamrocks scoring 19 points for the match and was prominent throughout. In another busy defensive effort Shamrocks forwards Gareth Thomas, Jesse Roche, Kalem Smith and Damien Clarke were strong. Center Ben Stewart and Ben Ridgeway also stood out for the Rocks.

Avondale 45 (Jesse Leng 3 tries, Anthony Amone 1 try, Jake Kamire 1 try, James Benn 1 try, Silipa Tuagamala 1 try, 5 goals)

Def Shamrocks 34 (Ben Ridgeway 1 try, Tim Hawkins 1 try, Liam Vuik 1 try, Tom McDevitt 1 try, 4 goals, 2 penalty goals)  

Other Match Results

Vikings 17 Def Shoalhaven 10

Campbelltown 33 Def Kiama 22

Tech Waratahs 41 Def Camden 12