#...don't think I've ever used this many tags for reach before lmao
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actually I've been thinking
Suddenly got real curious... You can't take back a Kudos so I think most people actually seem to wait until the entire work is complete—but if I read an unfinished work that makes me go insane, you KNOW I am commenting asap.
#...I think i've started leaving more comments than kudos lol#not by a large margin at all but just as of late#ao3#fic#fic writing#fan fiction#writing#polls#tumblr polls#kudos#ao3 kudos#not going to beg for reblogs but I will admit I am curious#I expect the first two options on the poll to be the most popular but I may be surprised!#poll#fanfiction#...don't think I've ever used this many tags for reach before lmao#writing community#writers of tumblr#readers of tumblr#fic reading
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Can you write Alastor x a Reader who works in radio? I don't think Alastor would let them on air since he doesn't seem the type to have a co host to me but maybe he'd have a intern who gets him coffee or a script writer.
"𝔦𝔱'𝔰 𝔤𝔬𝔬𝔡 𝔱𝔬 𝔟𝔢 𝔟𝔞𝔠𝔨 𝔬𝔫 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔞𝔦��" || {𝔞𝔩𝔞𝔰𝔱𝔬𝔯}
tags: gn!sinner!reader (described to have horns but is an otherwise ambiguous demon!!), fluff, pre-established relationship, mentions of death, true crime, vox being vox lmao, jealous alastor, blood/bloody play (sorta??), Valentino is his own warning (threats of SA but nothing happens), mentions of injuries and being kidnapped (use of chloroform), implied VoxVal, no smut but still MDNI
a/n: I hope you enjoy!! This got a bit long!
Much like Alastor's life before he died, you were also quite the popular radio host for your time. Engaging, funny, and respectable. Your audience loved tuning in the early hours of the morning to you recanting the strange occurrences of the multiple killings of men from the late 1920s until that stream suddenly stopped during the year 1933 within New Orleans, Louisiana.
True crime has always been your passion, in life and in death. You certainly didn't think you'd end up in Hell for taking the life of someone trying to mug you on the street. A tall, masked man who saw to it that you'd never see the light of day again. A couple gunshot wounds to your abdomen proved effective as you rest against the wall, bleeding out onto the concrete with your soon-to-be killer lying facedown and dead mere feet from you. Killed by the very thing you sought to bring awareness towards. Quite poetic in a way.
As your gaze clouds and vision becomes unfocused, you look up at the stars. The ares around you was beautiful. It was one of your favorite parts of town, even your death wouldn't taint the beauty of the stretching oak and maple trees reaching tall towards the skies. The faint sound of smooth jazz playing from the record shop only a few paces away mixing with the swirling scent of coffee. At least you were dying in a place that you loved.
Now, here you are. In Hell. Doomed to total damnation for all fucking eternity. You'd been down here for a couple months, taking up residence near Cannibal Town, yet still unsure of what to make of all the carnage, debauchery, and depravity. You didn't think you belonged in Hell, even if you took the life that simultaneously extinguished your own.
"What's wrong, dearie? I've known you to be quiet but today you are exceptionally so." Mused Rosie, her gentle tone pulling you out of your reverie. You glanced down at your tea, sighing.
Leaning your cheek against your palm, you meet her charcoal-black eyes. Genuine concern etched onto her politely beautiful face. "I'm just feeling lost is all, I guess. I told you how I ended up in Hell, right?" Solemnly, Rosie nods.
Placing down her tea cup, Rosie wiggles towards you a bit. "Maybe you just need to find that old spark again! Something that roused you when you were alive! I have a friend who was a radio host, same as you. He may be able to have a job for you! Alastor is as charming as they come!" She grins, her mouth full of pointed teeth on full display.
Your brow quirks. "Alastor? The Radio Demon?" Rosie nods, excitedly. Alastor had been the prolific serial killer that haunted New Orleans back in the 1920s. It felt weird that the main man-- subject, you studied in life would soon be your acquaintance and potential boss in death. You'd heard many hushed tales about the aforementioned Radio Demon dealing in bartered souls and how he wreaked havoc against his fellow Overlords overnight. He definitely seemed like the kind of demon you didn't want to make light of, or worse, be on his bad side.
"He's a quirky one, for sure, but don't listen to all those rumors and gossip!" Rosie waves her hand with a laugh. "Alastor is still a gentleman and I'm sure he'd be delighted to offer you a job! Maybe you can intern for him? Besides! If he's ever rude to you, ol' Rosie will kick him in the shins! I'll wear my extra-pointy boots!" She giggles, holding your hands in hers. "You'll be in good hands, my dear! I'll let Alastor know you're coming right away!"
Staring down at the neatly folded paper in your hand, you double and triple check the address scrawled in neat calligraphy.
Hazbin Hotel.
Was it normal for a former serial killer slash radio host to become a hotelier that's trying to rehabilitate sinners?
With a shrug, you made your way up the incline taking note of the rather ominous looking radio tower jutting out from the far-right side of the hotel. A sign displaying the words on-air was currently unlit and it looked quite dark inside from what you could see from the ground. Perhaps the great Alastor wasn't at home.
Knocking on the front door, you're greeted by a tall, deer-like demon with two-toned hair and sharp yellow teeth dressed in a dapper red-pinstripe suit complete with a microphone-like cane. Scarlet eyes stare down at you like a lion watching a gazelle. You feel utterly and completely exposed, like he's peeling back your every layer, surveying you, before he even said a single word.
"Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel, my dear! Quite a pleasure! You must be the little darling that dear Rosie sent, yes?" Alastor places his hand on your lower back, guiding you past the hotel's front doors and into the welcoming comfort of the establishment's front lobby and reception area. "This is a place where wayward sinners such as yourself can find peace and be led on the path of redemption to ascend to Heaven by Hell's very own princess, Charlie Morningstar!"
On queue, a blonde-haired girl sprints up to you squealing and flailing her arms a bit. She takes her hands in yours and offers you a big, delighted smile. You like her immediately. "Oh, my gosh! Welcome, welcome to Hazbin Hotel! I see you've met our gracious host Alastor! He's mentioned that you're going to be interning for him-- how exciting! We are so thankful to have you!"
With the attention directed back at him, Alastor grins with a whine of radio static. It was the equivalent of a lazy smirk with his half-lidded scarlet eyes taking you in one more, searching for any potential risks you may pose though you didn't intend any of that sort. You felt your skin begin to heat the longer his gaze remained on you, and hesitantly break the eye contact with the demon in favor of Charlie, who has been excitedly talking about all of the hotel's features.
To think, all those months ago had been the start of your journey with your friends. You had felt so out of place in Hell, in your new skin, uncomfortable with the weight of sharp horns protruding your skin and the strength of your clawed hands. You were quite pleasantly surprised at what you could withstand now as a demon.
"I brought your coffee, sir." Alastor hums out a soft 'thank you' yet continues to fiddle with the buttons and tracks on his console, not raising his head to look at you. "Rosie gave me some venison for you. She said aid it's your favorite when it's fresh and raw." Placing Alastor's simple black coffee on a small side table, you revere your boss with a fond expression. Rosie had been truthful she said he was the charming sort. There certainly was an air of respectability about him that men lacked from your time.
"Our dear Rosie is certainly a clever one, and she is quite correct. There is no better way to enjoy meat than having it served fresh. Preferably off the bone but this will do." Alastor tilts his head, turning to the side to regale you from the corner of his eyes. Those damn beautiful scarlet gems. "Something the matter, my dear?" Alastor's voice is a soft crackle.
Stumbling in surprise, you wrack your brain for a plausible answer. When you find none, you shake your head from side to side cursing the heat that sets your cheeks ablaze.
Alastor smirks, standing from his stool and approaches you. He grasps your chin between his thumb and forefinger; his claw lightly dragging across your lower lip. Blood beads up following the path his claw created. He swipes it up, licking it in front of you.
"Tasty," Alastor grins, leaning down and bumping his nose into yours. "As I said, meat is best when fresh." He squeezes your cheek lightly, chuckling at the exudes into his palm. "If I wasn't certain, I'd say you have a little crush on me, hmm?" He turns his back to you, those damned scarlet eyes that see straight through your soul strike you where you stand. "That'll be all now, dearest. Thank you for your time and your blood."
You couldn't get out of there fast enough. You weren't afraid of him, no, you were more scared of kissing him now more than ever. A fantasy of both of you pressed tight to one another with mouths soaked in blood would be all you can think of for hours.
Whatever was going on between you and Alastor continued on much like a game of cat and mouse only he seemed to be going out of his way more and more to fluster you, saying things that would catch you off guard.
"I don't think of myself as much of a man who desires a relationship beyond friends and family, but cohabitating with you as lifelong partners does sound desirable."
"Hmm, tell me. Are your horns sensitive?" His breath ghosts then one day, causing you to shriek and cover them. You pout, turning your head to glare at him. Alastor's grin only seemed to stretch further. "Only teasing, darling, no need to get so uppity."
It was a slow evening, Alastor had sent you off on another errand. There was a sense of apprehension worrying his brow, glancing at the analog clock. The hour hand strikes the 3am mark. He'd sent you off almost an hour and a half ago, so where were you?
Interference crackles onto his radio, Alastor hissing as the feedback screeches. With ears pinned back, his eyes narrowed further when a familiar voice crosses.
"Ugh, I will never understand why thr fuck you use this shit, Alastor." Groaned Vox. "Anyway, I got your cute assistant here. You should see them, shaking like a leaf." The radio glitches in tune with Vox's laughter. "Valentino here has been itching for a new plaything, doesn't that sound good, sweetheart? Maybe we can broadcast that for all of Hell to see, right Al--"
Smash. Alastor's fist smashes through the radio cutting off Vox's boastful rant.
On the other side of the city, Vox blinks in confusion. "I lost the radio signal? Oh, fuck, God this shit is so old." He sighs, leaning back in his chair. Spinning around, he gives you a wry smirk. "Guess we'll see if the Great Alastor comes to rescue his lost pup, hmm?"
Glowering at him, left bound and gagged, sitting on the cold, hard floor. Valentino gives a harsh tug on your hair, your teeth sinking into the cotton gag shoved in your mouth, a muffled grunt leaving you.
An electric feeling in the air has your hair rising. Vox and Valentino share a confused look. A large fist blasts inside of the V Tower, claws sharp as they did through the metal like it was butter.
"Oh, fuck, it's Alastor!" Vox shrieks, scrambling to get away from the broken window. A second fist smashes through sending Vox into the opposing wall with a deep thud. Valentino runs to his friend's aid, helping him up.
"Well, this is what you wanted, honey."
Vox groans in protest. "I know."
Green electricity crackles, a dark shadow pooling into the room and with a shriek, manifests into Alastor.
Paying the two no mind, Alastor crosses the threshold and kneels down before you. His clawed fingers are gentle as he removes the gag around your bruised mouth. "Sorry it took me so long, mon cour." A tentacle bursts through his back, spiraling directly into Vox and Valentino, sending the two into the neighboring room with a loud crash.
Scooping you into his arms, Alastor calmly walks through to the next room, his hand cupping the back of your head. "Rest." He regards the other two males with a snarling crackle.
"If I didn't have more important matters to attend to, I would eviscerate you two gents. Touch what is mine again and I'll broadcast your fucking screams all over Hell." Alastor hums, exiting V Tower.
"Holy shit! Did you see?? He finally sees me as his rival!" Vox cheers, tossing both arms into the air in celebration.
Valentino sighs, "Honey, you need psychiatric help."
"This may sting, but I trust that you can handle it." Alastor says, rubbing off the blood from your brow with a cotton ball doused in isopropyl alcohol. Wincing softly, you take the moment to look at him closely. You'd never seen Alastor so disheveled. Even with dealing with enemies, he was always composed. But, tonight, he had been anything but the picture of composure. He looked positively feral.
"Is there something about my face you find interesting, dearest?"
Squeaking, your face flushes, shaking your arms frantically. Gasping you quickly place a hand to your ribs. Guess they really did fracture something when they knocked you out.
Alastor stills your hands with his own. "Easy now, pet. You're in no state to be moving around like an interpretive mime. I was only teasing you, my dearest. You had me worried tonight."
Hanging your head low, you turn your gaze away. "I'm sorry, Alastor. I don't know how they got the drop on me. I was walking home and smelled something odd--," you gasped in realization. "Chloroform. It had to be."
Alastor growled tensely at that. He tied the bandage around your arm and with a snap of his fingers the medical kit disappeared and a serving tray appeared carrying a kettle full of hot chocolate and a staple 1920s dessert: pound cake. This one was drizzled with a bitter chocolate and filled with strawberries.
Alastor takes your hand and gently kisses your knuckles. "Care to join me for a treat?" His tone was a touch more gentle than it had been a heartbeat ago. You smile, nodding eagerly. He grins and begins to cut the cake, serving you first. "One more thing."
Softly, Alastor kisses your cheek. It was the lightest of touches and over as soon as it happened. He busies himself by pouring two mugs of steaming hot chocolate, the apples of his cheeks were a rosy hue.
|| ᴘʟᴇᴀꜱᴇ ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ʀᴇᴘᴏꜱᴛ, ʀᴇᴜꜱᴇ, ᴏʀ ᴇᴅɪᴛ ᴍʏ ᴡᴏʀᴋꜱ ɪɴ ᴀɴʏ ᴡᴀʏ! ɪ ᴅᴏ ɴᴏᴛ ɢɪᴠᴇ ᴘᴇʀᴍɪꜱꜱɪᴏɴ. ᴛᴜᴍʙʟʀ ɪꜱ ᴛʜᴇ ᴏɴʟʏ ꜱɪᴛᴇ ᴡʜᴇʀᴇ ɪ ᴘᴏꜱᴛ. ᴀʟʟ ᴄʜᴀʀᴀᴄᴛᴇʀꜱ ʙᴇʟᴏɴɢ ᴛᴏ ᴛʜᴇɪʀ ʀɪɢʜᴛꜰᴜʟ ᴏᴡɴᴇʀ ᴀɴᴅ ᴛʜᴇ ꜱᴛᴏʀʏ ʙᴇʟᴏɴɢꜱ ᴛᴏ ᴍᴇ © ᴄʜᴇʀᴜʙꜰᴀᴇ 2024 ||
#hazbin hotel x you#hazbin hotel imagines#hazbin hotel x reader#hazbin imagines#hazbin alastor x reader#alastor x reader#alastor imagine#alastor x you#cherubfae 2024#tw: kidnapping
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chwedout has finally reached 1k followers! thank you to everyone who decided to press the follow button, from those who followed me way back in the spiderstingle days to those who only followed me recently, i really appreciate it! to celebrate this milestone, i've decided to do a few things.
first of all, i've finally started a tracking tag — #chwedoutbox. you can find more about it in this post. i can't wait for you all to use it so i can see and share all the cool things you create.
secondly, i've decided to open up my ask box to requests! all you need to do is choose one of the following prompts and send a request through my ask box.
seventeen member + music video (e.g. vernon in rock with you)
seventeen member + going seventeen episode (e.g. mingyu in svt's kitchen for two)
this or that (e.g. left & right era wonwoo or 24h era wonwoo/ long haired jeonghan or short haired jeonghan)
there's no limit to how many requests you can send, go wild if you want to. i just ask that you be patient with me as sometimes i do like to go outside to breathe in fresh air and touch some grass. sending requests on anon is okay too! however, i won't be able to tag you when i do eventually post your request.
now i just want to say a massive thank you to all of my mutuals! being sappy lowkey makes me cringe but i couldn't have reached this milestone without any of you. to my og mutuals (i won't tag you dw) who were here way before i turned into a kpop blog, to my newest mutuals who i probably haven't spoken to, thank you! i hope you all know how much i appreciate you and that you all mean so much to me ♡
first of all my ride or dies- the hhu wives- sarah @vertiny, bec @storyoflight, and alex (idk if you deactivated </3) i literally would not be here without all of you. we've been through so much together and i just want to say that i love all of you so so much! let's all hope that we can one day go to that svt concert together.
j @vcrnons - my dolly in crime and my first ever caratual on tumblr! if i remember correctly, you followed me way back when i hadn't fully committed to being an svt blog yet. thank you so much for being so kind and supportive to me when i first started. i mean it when i say i don't think i'd be here if we didn't become mutuals since your work always inspired me to start creating myself.
ophelia @lee-sanghyeok - another one of my fave vernon stans! thank you for always being a joy to see on the dash! you're so incredibly sweet and i know i can always count on you to send me vernon content when i ask for it.
kashi @jeonsupershy - one of my fave wonwoo stans fr! seeing all of your wonwoo gifs always puts a smile on my face. every time he does something i just know that i'm going to be reblogging one of your stunning gifs later in the day. thank you for always being such an awesome presence on the dash. i'm so grateful to be mutuals with you!
max @scouped - you are so incredibly talented and i really hope you know that! i'm always in awe whenever i see one of your creations on my dash. you definitely inspire me to push the boundaries of my creativity when it comes to making content. i do miss your presence on tumblr but i'm always happy when i see you on the dash from time to time.
tiff @uservernon - my beloved dolly moot! thank you for always being so sweet. you always bring such a fun and bright presence to caratblr and i love seeing you on the dash or in my notifs especially when you're screaming about vernon. the url is still a powermove in my opinion!
maddie @jeonwon-wonwoo - you are genuinely one of the kindest and friendliest people i've met on tumblr. i've had so much fun talking to you about the most random things. i'll never forget our chats about the walking dead and teen wolf. i hope you're doing well!
yena @fairyhaos - my fave joshua stan! i hope you know that every time i see the couch shua pic i think of you lmao. i always love seeing you lose your mind over shua and you never fail to make me laugh with all the tags you leave on posts. thank you for bringing such a positive energy to caratblr! i'm so glad to have you as a mutual.
zaynab @galatariel - another one of my insanely talented mutuals! your gifs are always so gorgeous and always inspire me to go out of my comfort zone and create something new. i always enjoy seeing you make content for the things you love. thank you for being so kind and helpful.
nuri @jjunhui - again, another mutual who is extremely talented! everything you make is just stunning and your svt as text posts gifsets never fail to make me laugh. thank you for being so supportive and kind. i am so grateful to have you as a mutual.
nana @kyeomies - so glad to see that you're back! i've always enjoyed seeing your pretty gifs on my dash and can't wait to see more of your content. i hope you're doing well!
yo @redrcbin - literally one of my most beloved mutuals! i'm still not 100% sure when we became mutuals but i think it's pretty funny if it was because of the c-word game. i always love seeing you on the dash and in my notifs, especially when i see you losing your mind over wonwoo or mingyu. i'm so happy i get to call you a friend.
and to all the mutuals that i haven't talked to or interacted with that much - @jeongtokkie, @kimsmingyu, @wonboos, @leedonghun, and @soonhoonsol - thank you so much for being awesome! i really hope we do get to talk more in the future.
now i'm going to kick myself because tumblr won't let me tag anymore people and i'm pretty sure i've missed out on so many beloved mutuals of mine. i'm extremely sorry if i did, but please know that i appreciate every single one of you so much!
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20 Questions For Fic Writers
this has been sitting in my drafts for probably months and i actually don't remember who tagged me at this point sorry </3
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
26
2. What's your total AO3 word count?
168,724
3. What fandoms do you write for?
currently just rise but i've had some other fandoms i've written for in the past
4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
call me here (i will appear) Use Only For Intended Purpose The Idiot's Guide to Blindfold Chess new phone who dis because i fear i'm lost (and i cannot be found again) wow big surprise(/s) all of these are rise al;jfldksjfkd
5. Do you respond to comments?
i try to but uh </3 i am not very good at it
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
ummm. probably waiting for answers, wasting time bc even if u know the comfort and healing comes there very much isn't any in the fic itself so whoops </3 i am not good at hurt/no comfort so i don't. have a lot of fics that would really qualify
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
uuhhhhh ig fibonacci? most of my fics have relatively happy endings and. this is the one with the least angst overall so
8. Do you get hate on fics?
not yet thank god
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
i do not alfjdlkjfkdls
10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?
imma keep it real with you chief most of the crossovers that i've written are with other people's aus and idk if that counts
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
not that i know of fingers crossed
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
nope
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
yeesssss? sorta? it's not like, on ao3 but i've done some collab crossover stuff with friends (see aforementioned crossover question)
14. What’s your all time favourite ship?
god idk. i don't do a lot of shipping these days sorry </3 i have some ships i think are cute but i'm not like, into them enough to say they really qualify
15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
i want to finish idiot's guide and cmh very very badly and i refuse to jinx it. idk abt npwd solely because of like the type of fic it is, idk if it'll ever be finished finished yk. like there'll always be more little scenes i can do
16. What are your writing strengths?
um. i've been told i'm good at character voice
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
sweats nervously
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?
i don't really do it? i probably wouldn't unless it was like, just a couple words - i don't mind too much when other ppl do it bc i have a translation extension on my laptop but i don't have many options when i'm on my phone
19. First fandom you wrote for?
doctor who........ i was like. god idek. fifteen? maybe younger i straight up don't remember <- also none of this is on ao3 this was like, back in my ff.net days and i don't think i even remember my login lmao
20. Favourite fic you’ve written?
hmm hm hm. okay. probably because i fear i'm lost. just bc like... idk i'm proud of how it turned out and i'm really . idk. happy with the reception it got. i'm happy it reached people who can relate to it. and it's short enough that there's not like, enough space for there to be parts where i just have to force myself to write stuff i'm not 100% happy with to fill in the gaps. if that makes sense
tagging: You
#talk tag#hi sorry its been a million years since i even posted. im surviving#no ao3 writers curse i just have zero energy and some other stuff going on ie Bad Mental Block that i cannot for the life of me climb over#but i did get a tiny bit of writing done like... last week or something before it came back so! progress#fic talk#i think that was one of them. obligatory 'i forgor all my tags' tag
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Fic Writing Ask Game
I was asked to play by the wonderful @shooshopath ! I'm sending it to @toiletpotato @queenoftherandomword @spacebeyonce @surkovhasherpes
1. how many works do you have on ao3?
45
2. what's your total ao3 word count?
943,229
3. what fandoms do you write for?
Currently, just Patrochilles (TSoA and Hades)
4. top 5 fics by kudos?
Flashing Lights, Restless, to face the sea, where flowers bloom, Paradise, & and the nights, they are endless
5. do you respond to comments?
I do! I used to think it was really nice when authors answered my comments. I always make a point to answer comments to let people know I care about their feedback and that I appreciate their support, especially if they choose to become a consistent reader. It's a bit embarrassing though, half my comment count is me responding 😭
6. fic you wrote with the angstiest ending:
Lacrimosa
7. fic you wrote with the happiest ending:
I think the rest are all generally happy ending 😅 can't really pick one.
8. do you get hate on fics?
I had for a couple of my Patrochilles and Parenthood series, particularly on my OC. Tbh, I'm shocked I don't receive more, given that Black female characters usually receive minimal grace. Everyone's been very supportive, if not necessarily completely understanding the perspective of the narrative (thus the "your OC is a self insert" comment. Like, I'm writing about the experience of Black girlhood, where else am I gonna pull from lmao we tend to go through particular things!)
9. do you write smut? if so, what kind?
Nah, not really. I'll usually include a sex scene here or there, but I don't write just straight smut. There's always gotta be some angst or some sort of plot. I don't think my writing is good enough for straight smut, so I leave that to others.
10. do you write crossovers?
Technically my Patrochilles fics are crossovers, but fr I just tag both fandoms for reach. If I'm focused specifically on the TSoA rendition, I only tag for that. Otherwise, no. Same idea with MDZS.
11. have you ever had a fic stolen?
Apparently so! Well, not stolen, but heavily inspired by. Since it wasn't word for word, I'm not willing to get lynched by white fandom to start an argument about it.
12. have you ever had a fic translated?
I have!
13. have you ever co-written a fic before?
Nah 😅 unfortunately I'm too territorial about my writing process.
14. all-time favorite ship?
Patrochilles, with AshEiji as a close close second.
15. what's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
Blooms of a Wilting Garden. It's a WangXian fic I was super, SUPER passionate about... And then I burnt out of both the fic and the fandom. It was just so toxic in that space that I got disillusioned. Maybe I will- it is outlined!
16. writing strengths:
I personally think that I'm very good with dialogue and character motivations. I'm also very passionate about movement while I write, bc I think that it adds emphasis to both of those things. But yeah, I'm very intense about motivations- how might someone's character change in certain situations? What might cause an outburst in one moment might generate an incredibly calm response in another, all for the same character. It all depends on the situation, and I like exploring that.
17. writing weaknesses:
I feel like I could do better with "prettier" writing. On the one hand it's a style choice, I tend to prefer words that get to the point I'm trying to depict. On the other hand, sometimes I wish I could write as beautifully and set up as well done a setting as other writers. I've been trying to do better with that. But I also write fic as a hobby so... 🤷🏾♀️
18. thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?
I've tried direct translation (language, then the English translation next to it) and italicizing. Some phrases I know well enough to use the former, but if I get caught up I will use the latter.
19. first fandom you wrote for:
On AO3? Bnha, tododeku (thus the name of the blog. I was pretty intense about it. Oh how I've grown in 4 years).
20. favorite fic of yours:
Hmmm... This is hard. I love all my fics as a favorite for different reasons 😭😭 the overall winner? Restless, my first AshEiji fic. It's one of my fics that I'm always rereading, and I love how it came about because of two nightmares I had. Like they really worked in allowing me to write a perspective on Eiji that I felt I wasn't seeing in the fandom at the time. Protection (my second Philia fic) is my second place.
Thanks for sending this to me! I'm so happy to see it 😊 I miss talking about my stuff sometimes.
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WIP Whenever (Actually on a Wednesday!)
@chevvy-yates had tagged me in a WIP Whenever thingy last week (I think? What is time) and @breezypunk sharing their WIPs reminded me I meant to do this. So, stuff I'm working on!
Over my Christmas break, I just started barely scratching the surface of working on my own custom poses. Because I'm me, I desperately need some battle couple poses--Fighting side-by-side, holding the other one while they're wounded, maybe fighting each other, etc. I compiled a Pinterest inspo board here to get an idea of what I'm going for.
This pose isn't anywhere close to being finished, but it's a start:
A small confession: while I actually like working in Blender quite a bit, I kind of hate everything else about modding, lmao. I've probably said it before, but my day job requires me to use so many shitty apps and software that always require 37 workarounds just to perform normally--I really don't have a lot of patience for troubleshooting shit during my leisure hours. Hopefully, the project won't become too much of a headache when I get into importing and working with props. 🤞
Virtual photography is always a constant for me these days--I was actually thinking yesterday how it feels like the absolute perfect creative medium for me. I like drawing and writing and 'real' photography, and I very much need to make sure I have more analog and tactile creative projects to keep me sane, but VP just hits in a way nothing else really has.
I am still working on the photostory I shared last time, but I don't want to give away too much there. It's also on a bit of a pause while I figure out some tech issues (read: I regret updating my game, lmao). However, I already have a ton of shots/mini-stories I need to queue up:
Other than that, it's kind of personal reflection shit and contemplating goals/resolutions for 2024. Getting long-winded and a little blunt under the cut:
I've always really struggled with making goals--I don't think I've ever had a situation in which I explicitly stated "I have a goal of XYZ" and then I achieved XYZ. I've had plenty of nebulous "Hey, I think I'd like to do XYZ" thoughts and then lo and behold, I do actually make XYZ a reality, but as soon as the word "goal" is attached to something, I just check tf out.
It was actually something I was trying to talk to my therapist about last summer, and then we kind of hit a dead end on that specific topic and decided I had other problems that were more pressing to deal with, lmao. But all the best goal advice in the world--following the SMART method, sharing it with someone for extra accountability, etc.--Just does not work with my brain.
(The accountability thing in particular always hugely backfires for me because just telling someone I want to do a thing tricks my brain into thinking I did that thing and now I don't need to anymore. Also, I don't like people telling me what to do, so if someone was like "hey, shouldn't you do this thing so you can meet your goal" I will say no just on principle of being a brat, lmao. I really hate that piece of advice.)
I know some of it, probably a lot of it, is fear of failure if I don't meet the goal. I'm very hard on myself--That's a no-brainer.
But I also think some of it, maybe just as much, is fear of success. Which I used to think was the stupidest fucking thing anyone could say about this shit, but success can mean big change. Success can mean increased feelings of imposter syndrome. Success can mean attention and responsibility I don't want. Success can mean bigger consequences if I do fuck up later.
I've come to realize that success is honestly as equally scary to me as failing.
I think this is a big reason I've always been content (or convinced myself to be content) with being good and not great, even if that means I'm not reaching my ~*full potential*~. (There are other external/macro reasons for that too, like my loathing of people trying to push me to monetize my passions, but I don't feel like getting into systemic gripes, lmao.)
Goals that require me to step outside of my usual routine also give me a lot of anxiety, which is something I've working towards managing (you could say that it's a goal of mine to get that under control dfgjhfjgdf), but that's still a very real hurdle for me.
Like I've been trying to go back to a minimum of 20 minutes of dedicated exercise (versus just walking a lot) a 3 times a week, and I get stressed if I miss it, or even just feel like I'm going to miss it (like if 7 PM starts creeping up and I haven't started it yet), but I also get all bent out shape spending 20 minutes on exercising while I'm doing it as if there's a better use of that time and THERE'S NOT. Like, what am I really missing? 20 minutes of scrolling Tumblr? Shut the fuck up, lmao.
All this to say that I don't really feel like I'm ready to set goals in a traditional sense, and that might not be something that ever works for me, but there are things I think would just be... kinda nice for me to do for myself that I want to do this year:
I need to actually be nicer to myself. As a matter of fact, @ren3gade--I hope you don't mind the tag, but I've been meaning to thank you for the "forgive yourself" advice you shared a couple of months back. I started making it a point to use that in my self-talk when I start spiraling, and it has been one of the best means of mitigating certain aspects of my social anxiety. I felt goofy as hell when I first started doing it, but that shit works. Positive self-talk makes you feel better, wow, who knew certainly not me
In a similar spirit, I want to stop being so judgemental about my limitations, and I need to mitigate feelings of guilt when I set boundaries for my mental health and energy. This is something I want to achieve in all areas of my life, but I think the easiest place for me to start flexing these muscles is with fandom. Because, damn, I let myself get into some really bad habits with the CP77 fandom (and I forgive myself for that 🙌). One of the big ones has been putting pressure on myself to keep up with what all my CP77 mutuals are doing at all times, and I'm not doing that to myself anymore. I've spent so much time in the past two years methodically going through tags and blogs to catch up on stuff I missed, and I'm just... relieving myself of this obligation. I know a lot of folks have tried to mitigate that for themselves by encouraging everyone to use their username-tracked tag--I'm not doing that. I'm not giving y'all more tagging work, and I'm not going to give myself the same obligation just in a different way. If I miss a post, I miss a post. Of course y'all are always more than welcome to @ me or send me things you think I'd enjoy (I love that, actually!!), but I'm just one person--I'm incapable of being an omnipresent fandom cheerleader and I don't know why I was pushing myself to be that. Well, that's not entirely true--I have some idea of why, but that's also a mentality I'm leaving in the dust. 😘 Also, for a long time, I did not use the like button for anything other than personal posts purely out of spite because I got tired of people complaining when they'd get likes but not reblogs--My asshole mentality was "Fine, now you get nothing." And that worked for me for several years and several fandoms, but I'm frankly tired of the "like" slander on Tumblr. It's a valid form of interaction and letting someone know you liked their stuff. I don't say this with malice, but other people's mentality of being unhappy with likes instead of reblogs is not my burden to bear. Anyway, I don't want to turn this into a rant about fandom stuff, lmao, but the point is I need more boundaries in my life, and I'm starting here.
I'm happier when I spend more time than I have been on traditional art and creative things that get me off my PC. Like I said above, I love VP so much, but it does unfortunately tether me to my computer desk longer than is probably good for me in the long run, mentally and physically. I stocked up on some new traditional art supplies, and I need to put those to use now that I'm settled into my new place. (And I've been itching to do a charcoal portrait of my bb girl.)
Reading books (gotta be physical, no screens) also makes me feel better. I've got about 7 books on my nightstand that I could totally finish this year--Doing that might be the one stereotypical goal I make for myself.
I want to reevaluate how I "multitask;" in particular, I want to break the habit of always having to have a background show/movie on OR always feeling the need to do something on my computer/phone while I watch a show/movie. Even as a kid (way before I lost my attention span to my smartphone lmao), I've always been inclined to doing something else while I watch shows and movies, but that used to be limited to drawing or painting my nails, which I think is fine. Now I just always feel like I need a screen nearby to do something else, even if there's really not something else worth doing. And listening to music or podcasts while I work on a thing is also fine, but it's gotten to the point where I almost can't have complete silence, and I don't like that. I miss being comfortable with silence while I pour all of my focus into a project. I just need to find some equilibrium here.
I know this isn't exactly a standard WIP Whenever, but me is what I'm working on, and I think it's all essential stuff to nurturing my creativity. 😊
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I was tagged by @go-go-devil!
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
I currently have 151.
2. What is your AO3 wordcount?
327,526
3. What fandoms do you write for?
Currently the most recent fics I wrote have been for Cadence of Hyrule but I've also recently written for Iconoclasts and Pokemon.
4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
The Ferris Wheel (Bugsnax, Snorplo) - 248
Gemini (Bugsnax, body horror) - 169
Imitation Beef (Bugsnax, continuation of a canon scene) - 165
Imago (Elden Ring, Miquella wakes up as a big bug) - 154
Field Notes (Bugsnax, AU, cosmic horror) - 148
5. Do you respond to comments?
I always try to, even if it's just to say thanks.
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
oh god probably one of my bugsnax fics... bugsnax really was ripe for angst. Both One Last Dance and Weary end in the implication that everybody has succumbed to the snax. I tend to leave things on more ambiguous notes than angsty, so even if the characters are in a sad or desperate situation it's uncertain what's going to happen to them next.
7. What is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
Sleep is Dark Souls III fic that implies the age of dark is actually a good thing and Lorian and Lothric survive to see it after all they've been through. I know I have written other happy things but this one is very hopeful.
8. Do you get hate on fics?
I've gotten a couple shitty comments or ones where I was just like, I have no idea what you're trying to communicate to me, but they're extremely rare and I just delete them if I do get them.
9. Do you write smut? If so, which kind?
I do not write smut. Just not my thing.
10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest crossover you’ve ever written?
Not often, I have a few Fromsoft crossovers but I did write a Bugsnax/Nier Automata fic that never got finished. That's Between My Teeth.
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Not that I know of!
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
Yes, quite a few. Ao3 user Dashana in particular has translated a number of my Iconoclasts fics to Russian. I will probably never say no to having a fic translated if it helps it reach a larger audience, especially because I tend to pick niche fandoms or subjects.
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
I have, with @malicious-fisheeves and with @wheeled-jack as well as some other friends who don't really use tumblr.
14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?
I really don't feel that strongly about ships much of the time but I do really like Wally/May from Pokemon RSE/ORAS and Gwyndolin/Darkmoon Knightess from Dark Souls.
15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
Ugh I have this Mochi Mayhem rewrite thing in the works but I just can't seem to make any progress on it. I may put it out there unfinished but the problem is I have a big chunk of the beginning done and then a scene at the very end and nothing in the middle lmao.
16. What are your writing strengths?
I've been told I'm really good at building dread. I personally think I'm good at writing platonic and familial character relationships, and writing characters who might be antagonists but who are complex and sympathetic.
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
I have some trouble when it comes to writing incidental side characters that might serve a purpose for one scene but aren't really that important.
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?
I really enjoy writing dialogue, it's one of my favorite parts of the process.
19. First fandom you wrote for?
I wrote a Rayman 3 fic about some OCs of mine probably back in 2003 or something. It was about these griffin-like creatures that had the powerups tested on them and it fucked them up because they were flesh and blood rather than made of cloth like the Hoodlum enemies are. They were trying to escape the facility they were kept in. Unfortunately I do not think it's still posted on my old ff.net account so it may be lost media.
20. Favorite fic you’ve written?
I'll always be extremely proud of Monarch Sunrise (the bugsnax timeskip cruise fic) for the sheer scale of it (as far as my fics go) and for all the help I had plotting and editing it.
This is a tough question to answer though because I'm really happy with many of them. I'd say my favorite thing I've written lately is Lyre Lyre, my Octavo backstory fic, because I think it does a good job of laying out his situation in a concise and entertaining manner, like he's telling this story to a crowd.
as for tagging folks uhhh how about @wheeled-jack @mumagi @disco-descent
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Ao3 20 Questions
thank you @kagedbird for the tag!! <3<3 i will tag some friends @daedrabait @miraakswhore @somethingscarlet13 @queerbashir if u wanna participate <3
How many works do you currently have on ao3? Currently 25. holy shit, i thought it was more than that lol
What's your total ao3 word count? 98,336. Used to be like 200k before i cleaned out some old works i didn't care for anymore.
What fandoms do you write for? Skyrim and Star Trek TOS & AOS
What are your top five fics by kudos? Sorry Lass, Make Me Feel Mortal, Don't Shut Me Out, Fascinating, and Destroy Rebuild
Do you respond to comments? Sometimes! Honestly it depends on whether or not i'm online and see them. if i don't respond right away it feels rude to respond weeks after the fact, but for repeat commenters or usernames i recognize i try to!
What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? Idk i used to like to emotionally beat up Jim a lot, so probably one of the short stories where i explore all his traumas
What is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Probably Sorry, Lass. I originally wrote it in 2015 and i'm fairly certain it ends with a mushy marriage scene.
Do you get hate on fics? Surprisingly, no. I think i got a few rude comments back when i first started, but honestly everyone's been too kind to me.
Do you write smut? If so, what kind? Hell yeah brother that's what i do!! I love angsty, emotionally charged smut. my personal favorite to write is angry, hatefuck type of stuff. or when they're using it to avoid talking about feelings.
Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written? Not that i've ever posted lmao. I don't usually post non canon compliant fics for whatever fandom i'm working in.
Have you ever had a fic stolen? Kinda. a few years ago someone let me know that my work had been reposted to a fic site i don't use and one quick message got them to take it down. Also, i once posted a fic as a one off, forgot that i'd done that, and used the same scene much later in a larger story - and some nice commenter on the original let me know that someone had stolen my idea lmao
Have you ever had a fic translated? Nope, never had anyone request that and don't want to do so incorrectly.
Have you ever cowritten a fic? Kind of? an old friend and i used to write separate chapters of our self insert marvel fics and mush them together into one story lol. never posted it anywhere, it was just shared emails and google docs.
What's your all time favorite ship? God, that's hard. probably McKirk. as i've gotten older and unlearned all the internal shame about self inserts it's gotten easier to do a self insert story instead of an established pair.
What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? Every few weeks i pluck away at my regency au Miraak fic. i don't think i'll ever actually finish it because it's just so big in my head it's hard to get on paper, but i hope i do someday.
What are your writing strengths? I'm very comfortable writing sex scenes. I think that often when the author is uncomfortable about writing explicit sex the reader can really feel it in the story and i put in a lot of work to get over those mental hurdles. i've been told i'm good at characterization, which is awesome! i love getting in a character's head!
What are your writing weaknesses? Very often i find myself bogged down with the need to describe every little scene. it's a major reason i haven't posted a longfic in a while - i want to write these big stories but find myself getting lost in the little details. i also have a terrible habit of editing myself while i'm writing, which just gets me stuck in an unproductive loop.
Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? Since i'm only fluent in English, this isn't something i am confident in. i've written in a few fictional languages for fics before but would probably reach out or suggest another author if a reader wanted something that heavily involved this.
First fandom you wrote for? Twilight babey!!! self insert oc to smooch Edward Cullen when i was a little middle schooler!!! i didn't know what fanfiction was but i knew i had a big ol crush on him.
Favorite fic you've written? not to be cringe on main, but most of my favorites are things that never got published. they're the little things still hanging out in my google docs that i go back to over and over. i rewrote all of star trek into darkness word for word just to make bones and jim kiss, i made a self insert just to smooch skurge after hyperfixating on thor ragnarok, and the weird time a few months ago where i wrote like 40k words of a cowboy romance. i read them often and wish that i'd written more on many of them but i do not read my published works.
thanks to anyone who read my rambling lmao. love you all sososo much, thank you for reading my silly little stories and caring about them. <3<3<3
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20 Questions For Fic Writers
Thank you for the tag @marley-manson!
I'll be tagging @seaofolives, @alovelyburn, @white-winter-hymnals, @moonlight-blue-rose, and @shiroganeryo
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
Currently six, five complete and one ongoing
2. What's your total AO3 wordcount?
16,145
3. What fandoms do you write for?
Mainly Berserk but I also write for D.Gray-Man and dabbled in SK8 the Infinity
4. What are your top five fics by kudos?
A Familiar Canvas ➡️ wild (like young volcanoes) ➡️ say me, wight in the bom ➡️ One of Heart, One of Mind ➡️ Encompassing Lust
5. Do you respond to comments?
I always do!
6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
Probably Take Me to the Poppy Field. It's pre-canon ManaCross, so ofc it's angsty, and I do love myself some good ManaCross angst
7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
Easily One of Heart, One of Mind. It's a Yulma wedding fic and I shoved all the fluff and happy feels into it as possible
8. Do you get hate on your fics?
Not yet and not to my knowledge
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
Uhhhhh let's see. Encompassing Lust contains sexual content but I wouldn't go as far as to call it smut. I'd like to write a proper smut fic one day but I'd have to be in the proper mood for it, if you get my gist
10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?
wild (like young volcanoes) would be considered a crossover by some, but it's really just an au, a Percy Jackson au
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Hopefully not
12. Have you ever had a fic translated
Not yet
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
Not yet
14. What's your all-time favorite ship?
This is hard! Can I cheat and make it a three-way tie between GriffGuts, Yulma, and Matchablossom? I tend to alternate a lot between these three and I love them so much.
15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
My GriffGuts lovechild au. I've shared snippets of it on this blog before but every time I try to work on it, my mind takes me elsewhere. I still want to finish it though! The question is when
16. What are your writing strengths?
That's a very good question that I have no good answer to. I guess I'm pretty good when it comes to descriptions. And metaphors. I love myself a good metaphor, so when I have the opportunity to add one, I will
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
I'd be here all day if I listed off every one of my writing weaknesses lmao. But if I did have to narrow it down, it'd definitely have to be my perfectionism and chronic revisionism. I can't stand it when a word or sentence structure doesn't sit right with my mind. I'll just stare at it for minutes and if I can't find a solution, I'll just straight up nuke the entire doc because everything else starts to look wrong in my mind. My beta readers can attest to this
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in a fic?
*traumatic flashbacks of all the VLD fics that had Lance speaking bad Spanish/Spanglish*
I don't think writing dialogue in a different language is bad at all, it's just very obvious when the author is 1) a non-native speaker and 2) uses Google translate. Don't be afraid to reach out to friends who speak the language you're trying to write!
19. First fandom you wrote for?
Officially published? Berserk. But first ever? That would be Percy Jackson. It's a stapled five-page, handwritten reader insert fic and I still have it in my room, under my bed.
20. Favorite fic you've written?
Oh hands down it's One of Heart, One of Mind. Yulma is a ship that means so much to me and it quite literally defined the way that I viewed queer ships in media. It took me forever to write this fic but that was because I wanted to do them justice.
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fic writer meme
I was tagged by @ziusik <3
1. how many works do you have on ao3?
between my two pseuds, 132. I started posting end of 2018 and i orphaned 1 fic so that's everything
2. what's your total ao3 wordcount?
996,548 words
3. what fandoms do you write for?
Right now various Thai BL, mostly offgun, and I'm on the docket for a DCU fic for a pal who won me in a raffle
4. what are your top 5 fics by kudos?
the top 17 of my most kudosed are all MDZS wangxian, what a powerful fandom (then a witcher then a leverage)
Love Is More Than Telling Me You Want It - the omegaverse big gender feels one
Yeah I Know How You Like It - wwx gets telepathy and lwj is horny then touching about it. love every time i get a comment on this that's like this is a pwp why am i crying. hehe
your persuasions - lwj has a big dick and wwx is a san francisco based high tech software programmer. they fuck about it
the earthquake in the room - alternate universe Canada modern university fic. In which lwj does not make wwx toast
wild for your skin - canonverse pwp
from this i suppose that most people are pretty disappointed when i update and it isn't smut
5. do you respond to comments?
always! I feel like fandom is this thing we're making together and when people reach out to me I reach back and in that way we both add stitches to the tapestry that is the community
6. what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
I think most of my fics have a hopeful ending. So it might be Verbs are a Tragedy the Captain Marvel Carol/Maria fic about Maria grieving. Or wait! maybe the Never Let Me Go fic because it ends right before you know that Chopper is about to get his heart broken. Or the John Wick fic about Helen cause you know she dies later and isn't able to keep her promise of helping John leave the business? Ok maybe I do have some angsty endings.
7. what's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
ha what is happy. Maybe the Leverage fic where Eliot has to pretend to be married to Hardison even though they are exes and that one ends with him proposing to Parker and Hardison and them being happy together
8. do you get hate on fics?
Rarely. Not usually hate at me but sometimes my fics make people pretty angry. I don't love it when people yell at the fic. the funniest though is getting an angry bookmark on a fic that i turned comments off of cause people were angry. like you do you in the bookmarks but lmao
9. do you write smut?
do i ever
10. do you write crossovers? what's the craziest one you have written?
I write fusions and crossovers! My wildest crossover is a 5x fic about Fezzik and Inigo from the princess bride meeting different other characters which actually might be the angstiest one now that I think about it because their last section is them going to the grey havens from lotr so they can sail into the west together. they also party with phryne fisher
11. have you ever had a fic stolen?
i think only onto wattpad
12. have you ever had a fic translated?
Yes, and it's so cool!
13. have you ever co-written a fic before?
Twice! One time on a leverage fic and it taught me how to use semi colons and also write introspection, a lesson i have forgotten and one time lesbian beach volleyball porn with a friend.
14. what's your all time favorite ship?
uhhhh oh no. they're all my favourites. of the ships i've written... no can't do it.
15. what is a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
I dream of finishing my pacific rim x avatar fusion with mdzs. the worldbuilding was so much fun.
Everything else I think I've comprehensively abandoned in drafts. rip carol and maria having fun in space, jon and tormund going to winterfell, and the shl ocean's 11 au oh shit also the fic where wwx was adopted into the nie sect and it changes very little in some ways. Otherwise I tend to finish things I'm kind of a robot
16. what are your writing strengths?
smut and extended metaphors
17. what are your writing weaknesses?
description, romance, tenses, character introspection. i also think my sentence level writing is not that strong
18. thoughts of writing dialogue in another language in fics?
do whatever you want forever
19. first fandom you wrote for?
leverage! my first fanfic is on ao3 for that show. though technically i did a creative writing exercise where nietzsche and the librarian from a Borges short story hooked up as a class assignment in university so idk i guess maybe literary rpf
20. favorite fic you have written?
uhhhhh. i genuinely don't know. they're all their own little thing. im more interested in hearing which of my fics are other people's faves
tagging @idrilka @defractum @daltoneering @giraffeter @ginnymoonbeam
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20 Questions for Fic Writers
@zombiethingy tagged me right when I was about to exit tumblr to work on my final paper for this class and because I am a procrastinator, I'm doing it 😇
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
...136 (but to be fair that includes all of my one shot requests and microfics)
2. What’s your total AO3 word count? 597,089. I wanted to reach 750k by the end of the year, but I just don't think that's gonna happen and that is OKAY!
3. What fandoms do you write for?
Stranger Things only. I know in my heart I probably could go back and write some Stucky things, but with what time?
4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
call me sunshine, send me to space (chaptered)
i thought we were more, why aren't we more? (ficlet request)
one little nugget (chaptered)
it brought us here (ficlet request)
it led me to you (chaptered)
5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?
Yes! Sometimes I only have the spoons for emojis, but I do always respond. I want people to know I see their comments and appreciate them 💖
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
Any of the works in the my heart has changed, my soul has changed series. I definitely want to continue that series, but life is angsty enough right now.
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
ALL OF THEM. Truly can't write things that don't end happy or at least very very hopeful.
8. Do you get hate on fics?
Uh nope. I have moderated comments turned on though, so I think that deters any hateful comments, and I have literally only ever gotten one negative comment on a headcanon post on tumblr and just blocked them. Here for a good time, not to please everyone.
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
Yeah. I laugh because I started writing in January and was like "I can't write smut" and then by March I had a fic started that was rated E for extra sex. Incredible what a little time on this website does to the brain. It's just whatever fits the moment.
10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?
Hard no.
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Not that I know of. I'm pretty open about encouraging people to write their own versions of my stuff, but if I ever see a direct copy and paste it's on sight.
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
Not that I'm aware of? I really don't think any of them except for maybe call me sunshine would even be considered popular enough for that lmao
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
No, it makes me nervous. I always think everyone who I speak to on the regular is worlds more talented than I am and that I would be the deadweight in the group project (despite always being the leader of every school and work group project I've ever done). I wouldn't necessarily say no in the future with the right person!
14. What’s your all time favorite ship?
Steddie, though Stucky was it for me from like 2012-2022 and I do still love them so much.
15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
I really only work on one thing at a time, but I still want to write a part 2 to two request ficlets. They deserve the story being continued, but I don't know for sure when that will happen.
16. What are your writing strengths?
Strengths? What are those? I can lift my body weight, does that count? Okay, ummmm, writing strengths I guess would be finding ways to write these two idiots so in love in any situation. I will always always find a way to make them be in love.
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
I'll be kind to myself and narrow it down to two things: Environment descriptions. I can see it in my mind, but can I put it into words? No. Somehow still getting so carried away?! Genuinely don't know how I manage to not describe a lot of things and still describe too much.
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?
It's very difficult since I don't actually know any other language. I really don't do it unless it is absolutely necessary and I usually warn that I use Google Translate (which is not accurate).
19. First fandom you wrote for?
The first I published for was Stranger Things. The first I wrote stupid little things that I immediately deleted was Captain America/Marvel.
20. Favorite fic you’ve written?
I have to say I am so so proud of call me sunshine, send me to space. Not just because it's what's been most popular, but because I went so far outside my comfort zone to write and post it. It was the first time I felt like I had truly developed a universe for these characters and it's just a nice story.
No pressure tagging some people (seriously NO PRESSURE, we have ENOUGH PRESSURE): @wormdebut @wynnyfryd @messessentialist @steves-strapcollection @simplebtromance @stobinesque @starryeyedjanai @patchworkgargoyle @scarcrossdlvrs @ghostevie @yournowheregirl @thefreakandthehair @vecnuthy @theheadlessphilosopher @legitcookie @corrodedbisexual @flowercrowngods @vampeddie @matchingbatbites @judasofsuburbia @griefabyss69
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tag game ✨
I was tagged ages ago (sorryyy! 🙏) by the lovely @markpakin. Thank you so much! 💜
1. why did you choose your url?
Way back when I got back into giffing after a year of lurking in the BL fandom I needed a new url. I don't like using urls that are too obviously fandom-related (I don't mind them on other blogs at all!) but I did like Pha from Gen Y so I saw an opportunity and took it. This is before they killed Pha off due to some stupid fandom vote and ruined p much every couple in the series. 🤡
AND THEY DIDN'T EVEN GET HIS NAME RIGHT ON THE FAKE GRAVESTONE!!
Anyway I still really like the name so I'm probably never going to change it (I say all of this as I sit on @winnertanatat).
2. any sideblogs? if you have them, name them and why you have them.
I have archived sideblogs/fansites for old fandoms but other than that...
Oh wait, I have @dancingwithmyphone now where I reblog all the pretty things that I no longer reblog on here because it's mostly about Thai BL now. Does that make @pharawee the sideblog? 🤣
3. how long have you been on tumblr?
Uh, since 2011, I think?
4. do you have a queue tag?
I used to use my queue for aesthetic posts (that now go on @dancingwithmyphone) but now I exclusively use it for posts that tag me. I named the tag ♥ because ♥
5. why did you start your blog in the first place?
Because livejournal went under (I'm aging as I write this) and none of its clones seemed like a good alternative.
6. why did you choose your icon/pfp?
I had to (and also I really like YourMOOD):
7. why did you choose your header?
I made a header for every new HYBS mv. That was before they divorced called it quits and now I'm actually a bit sad every time I look at my header. I should really make a new one. :(((
8. what is your post with the most notes?
I'm super happy to say that it's about Thai marriage equality.
9. how many mutuals do you have?
Uh. Is there a way to find out?
10. how many followers do you have?
I recently reached 6k followers, half of which followed me after I started posting about BL. I honestly don't even know what to think of a number this big lmao hi!!
11. how many people do you follow?
The sidebar says 298.
12. have you ever made a shitpost?
No, only shit posts.🥁
13. how often do you use tumblr each day?
Several times... but not as often as I used to because I have some serious hobby burnout right now. :(
14. did you have a fight/argument with another blog once?
No, never. I'd cry.
15. how do you feel about 'you need to reblog this' posts?
I don't reblog them. Which is probably a bit petty, sry. 🙏
16. do you like tag games?
I love them so much but I just don't have the time to do them very often and I feel so bad about it. I even have them all saved for when I find the time but then I never do. :((((((
Of course then I also feel bad when I no longer get tagged in things due to not doing tag games. I am the architect of my own destruction.
17. do you like ask games?
I do! And I love sending people asks for ask games because hopefully it brightens their day a bit. 💜
18. which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?
You're all tumblr famous to me. 🥰
No, really, when I first got into BL tumblr I felt a bit like
Negl I still do. Idk what the arrows are. Weird fandom takes on twitter and mdl, I guess.
19. do you have a crush on a mutual?
Don't tell @cytharat but I've been crushing on her for ages. ❤️
20. tags?
@cytharat because I like her shoelaces 😘
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Twenty Questions for Fic Writers
Thanks @closetfascination for the tag :)
1. how many works do you have on AO3? 50
2. what's your total AO3 word count? 1,653,390
3. what fandoms do you write for? Currently Spider-Man and 13 Reasons Why
4. top five fics by kudos:
I Still Reach For You (To All The Boys I've Loved Before)
You and Me We Last Forever (To All The Boys I've Loved Before)
I Have and I Always Will (To All The Boys I've Loved Before)
What Makes A Family (13 Reasons Why)
Danger Always Was a Friend of Mine (To All The Boys I've Loved Before)
5. do you respond to comments? I do! Sometimes it takes me a bit but i do get back to everyone :)
6. what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? Hmm i don't actually know? i tend to have a habit of leaving things on a nice ending lol
7. what's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Almost all of them haha but recently maybe i swear that i'll be around for you
8. do you get hate on fics? Every once in a while
9. do you write smut? No, not really. i kind of just skirt around it
10. craziest crossover? I don't think i've ever written a crossover!
11. have you ever had a fic stolen? A long time ago yes!
12. have you ever had a fic translated? No
13. have you ever co-written a fic before? No
14. all time favorite ship? Toooo many! right now it's PeterMJ, but i felt like i could have written Lara Jean + Peter from To All The Boys forever (and i still miss writing them!)
15. what's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will? I go in with the believe that i will finish all my WIPs!
16. what are your writing strengths? Maybe dialogue? i'm not sure actually
17. what are your writing weaknesses? I feel like my descriptions could use some work
18. thoughts on dialogue in another language? It doesn't bother me, it's just not something i usually do
19. first fandom you wrote in? It... was the Jonas Brothers. i was like 13, long before AO3. i don't know that i've ever admitted that lmao
20. favorite fic you've written? Hmm I don't know that I really have a favorite but I was really proud of I Still Reach For You and more recently still a flicker of hope that you first gave to me
My AO3, in case you're interested in any of this madness:
momentsintimex
No pressure tags: @sahtinekryze @pichitinha @iovewords
and anyone else that would like to participate!
#the top 5 fics get me every time#sometimes writing for TATB feels like a fever dream but i miss them!!!#tag game
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Mutuals who just radiate positive energy-
weeee another moot game!! thank you anon <3
ps. im tagging the ones that i interact/talk to the most!!
@sungbeam - hear me out folks. beam is literally one of the sweetest human bean you'll ever find here cs honestly never in a million years i'd imagine us to be moots when i've been following her works WAY BEFORE writing myself 😭 though now we're just two crackheads who literally scream abt anything/everything everyday now lmao 🤡
@cloverdaisies - there is a reason why i call her my love bcs it is what it is. i love her sm, clo is just always there for me and checking up on me daily, like???? yes everyday i thank God for blessing me with such a beautiful soul 🤧💚
@flwoie - my OG best supporter of my works!! sona's been there since the beginning of my writing journey and it always flatters me how she speaks highly of my works (bcs i myself do not think of it that way honestly before meeting you???) the way how she only has nice things to say is just- 🥹🥹🥹
@hanniluvi - i met soph through sona bcs of how she recommended my hyunjae series to her (which btw i'll always be grateful for both of your reviews and thoughts abt my first baby 🥹) soph's the sweetest and always tagging me in lot of the moot games too!!
@cupidjyu - another sweet meimei 🥹 honestly both her and her works just straight up radiate positive energy 24/7 like 🥹🥹🥹 yumi's just so sweet and cute i love interacting with her always!
@zzoguri - another one of my biggest supporters!! i enjoy every single conversation i have with moni and i find myself smiling all the time as i chat with them 🤧 and thank you too for actually reaching out to me first in the dms!
@heemingyu - sana was the first one to hop into my dms and i can't tell you how grateful i am for that 😭 (bcs im shy and don't usually start the convo first ajskdjdj) i love how we've just naturally be able to talk to each other well & literally have some of the same interest too!! (ps we will ignore the fact how she's always sending me sangyeon stuff and enjoys watching me lose my shit- 💀)
@stealanity - our big sister matty!! i've mentioned this in a previous moot game but she's literally the sweet unnie who would send you a positive message always and just makes your day a whole lot better 🫶����
@haet-sal - my fellow hyunjae wifu!! lacey is just so freaking hilarious yall i can't even begin how many times she has made me cackle so hard 😭
@i520cm - my fellow malaysian moot!! 🇲🇾 another one who makes me cackle bcs ipah would literally pop up in our gc and suddenly drops a random ass topic which makes us drop dead cs of how funny it is 😭
@daisyvisions - my fellow ult fav sangyeon stan!!! daisy has always been so sweet and nice to me since the beginning and i can't tell you how happy i was when you first interacted and followed me 😭 i always love talking to you whenever!!
@kinouuu - we just recently became moots but the way how boki's already giving me such sweet and positive energy vibes is just 🫶🏻 i look forward to having more convos! (and im still shooketh and so happy with the fact that ive finally found a fellow irish moot!!! 🧡)
@etherealcheol-mp3 - another recent moot!! im so happy you reached out to me first in dms and i can't believe that we've already been able to talk about so many things!! hehe i look forward to more convos with you toro & YALL I FINALLY FOUND A FELLOW 01 LINER 😭😭😭😭😭
#tag games! 🎮#sweetest anon! <3#mutuals! <3#dearest beam ✨#clo my love 💚#sonata 🎶#soph 🎀#yumi 🩷#moni 🦝#sana 🍀#matty 💫#lacey 🍡#ipah 🐿️#daisy 🌼#boki 🍯#toro 🫧
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20 questions for fic writers
thanks for the tag @kiwiana-writes ❤️❤️❤️
I wasn't going to do this because a silly part of me was feeling some imposter syndrome - mostly because I haven't published a fic for RWRB yet, and that makes me feel like I'm not a 'real' fic writer (yes silly I know) 🙃 reminded myself that I have published stuff on ffn/ao3 before even though it was 6+ years ago 😅 ANYWAY filled this out so I can look back in a year or so and see what's changed 🌞
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
5 on my old AO3 account that I pretend doesn't exist 😂 1 on my new AO3 (though it's just a fic where I dump my drabbles)
2. What’s your total AO3 word count?
48k
3. What fandoms do you write for?
only RWRB now
4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
lmao not going specifically name them because these days I like to pretend all my old fics don't exist but my fic with the most kudos (354) is a soulmate fic 😌
5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?
Mostly! (I've tried to respond to all of them but I'm always fighting the procrastination monster)
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? 7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
Confession for these two questions - I've never actually finished writing a fic 💀 but! I don't think I could ever write an angsty ending - I need a happy ending 😂 I'm going to finish a fic one day, I swear (hilariously I think the first fic I'll ever finish will be the Vampire Henry fic at this rate LOL)
8. Do you get hate on fics?
Thankfully no
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
I've always planned to but I've never actually reached that part 💀 (see above confession about never having finished a fic lol)
10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?
Nope! Don't think it would be something I would do in the future either.
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
No and I don't think anyone would want to steal any of my half finished fics LOL
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
Nope
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
Nope
14. What’s your all time favorite ship?
Alex/Henry 🥺
15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
Ahh all the unfinished fics on my old AO3 account. Sometimes I still get comments on that soulmate fic asking if I'm ever going to update and while I'd love to finish it, I'm in a different headspace now from when I started it (10 years ago!)
16. What are your writing strengths?
Let me see if I've got an answer for this in a year because right now I genuinely don't know 😅
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
Does being a slow writer count? Never finishing a fic? I'm working on it 😅 I have 6 (whoops) WIP's right now and there's two that are SO CLOSE to being done - I've just got to keep fighting my easily distracted brain 🥲 The day I finish writing a fic, I'll genuinely cry and probably buy myself a cake to celebrate 😂
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?
I'd like to? I do love reading fics that include Spanish dialogue. But my second language (Tagalog) is kinda useless for this? 😂 You'd think it'd be helpful cause it uses a lot of Spanish words/phrases, but it's too much of a different language overall to be of any use. (lol I'll read fics with Spanish dialogue and randomly be amused when I recognize a word that's the same in Tagalog - "I know that word!!!")
19. First fandom you wrote for?
HP (hate what jkr has done to taint it tho 🙃)
20. Favorite fic you’ve written?
Since I've never finished a fic, my fave WIP's right now are my Fake Dating/College AU fic and my Vampire Henry fic 🥰
no pressure tags as always (sorry if you've already done this and I missed it 😅) @heybuddy-drabbles @affectionatelyrs @littlemisskittentoes @cultofsappho @happiness-of-the-pursuit @read-and-write- @14carrotghoul @inexplicablymine @suseagull04 +anyone who wants to do this
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Got tagged by @queenofbaws like 6 seconds ago to do this thing and because I'm currently trying SUPER hard to stay awake for at least another three hours to get me back on a 'normal' sleep schedule for the next week and a half, we're doing this shit now! ...and also because if I don't do it now then I'll just forget about it and never do it asjdhkjahsdkjs
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
59! Not a bad total all things considered 😤
2. What's your total AO3 word count?
337,514. That's an average of 5,720 words per fic btw akjdshjkahsd
3. What fandoms do you write for?
Until Dawn mostly. Got a decent amount of Tales of Phantasia stuff as well as a lot of ideas for it but cause that fandom is even deader than ud's, I never actually write any of it lmao
4. Top five fics by kudos
Valentine's Day Prompts (crossed out because while it's *technically* my highest I do not count it for the sole reason that like literally not even ten minutes after I uploaded it I got like 50+ guest kudos all at once so those are clearly bots and the correct kudos count is probably somewhere between 20 and 30 lol) What I actually consider my top five fics by kudos are:
The Final Days of Our Youth
More Than Worth It (though considering it was posted only barely a week after the vday prompts the kudos may be a bit suspect here as well 🤔)
Nothing and Nobody But You
The Sound of Silence
Baby It's Cold Outside (so hold me tight in your arms and don't let go)
5. Do you respond to comments?
I did/do. And by that I mean I love to, but the last couple of years I've been letting the few I've gotten pile up due to not being in a good headspace to answer/I've just been really busy at that exact moment. Which is important, cause if I don't have the time to respond then and there, I will just keep forgetting to reply. Which is how I've reached the point where I have almost 2 year old comments that I want to respond to but I feel like shit answering them now 2 years later, and let me tell you the feeling does NOT get any less guilty the longer I wait to respond aksjdhkajsdhjk
(maybe I should use this time to answer them while I try to stay awake lmao)
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
Hmmmm. I mean, technically the one I'm writing now? It's probably between Winter is Death and Not Only Monsters Hide Under the Bed where one fic involves Hannah slowly losing her free will as she spends a year with the Makkapitew taking over her body and the other is about a little girl hiding from the people sent to kill her village but being found and killed just before her brother got home to save her.
7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
...Somehow, this is the harder of the two to answer aksdjkjahsdkjashd uh.... pretty much any chrashley focus fic where the ending involves them actually confessing and getting together I guess? But if I have to chose one, I think The Final Days of Our Youth cause it's chrashley confessing and getting together, but also repairing their friendship that Chris very nearly torpedoed cause he's an avoidant moron.
8. Do you get hate on fics?
Surprisingly no! Thankfully anyone who does not like the ships I write for does not read my fics and thus does not leave comments. And if there us people out there who just do not vibe with my writing style (understandable) they've just clicked back and not responded either.
9. Do you write smut?
Once! I did it once and only once because I just really, really wanted to read about an awkward and clumsy first time between Chris and Ashley and that, uh, did not exist. So I (unfortunately for everyone lol) took it upon myself to write it. That being said, because it is smut, it is unsurprisingly the one fic I can always count on getting a new kudos or bookmark on every now and then.
And I will probably never write another one again sorry not sorry lol.
10. Craziest crossover?
I mean the only crossovers I've ever done is my Outlast au stuff but I don't really consider that a 'crazy' crossover lol.
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Not that I'm aware of! Like I'm not even sure that they've been scrapped by AI sites. Not sure why anyone would want to steal my fics in the first place though honestly.
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
I mean, no one's ever asked so I assume not? If they did though than all the power to them.
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
Nope! Never been asked and never asked anyone lol.
14. All time favourite ship?
I mean, Chris/Ashley easily, though Chris/Josh/Ashley is a *very* close second lol. (Chester/Arche is also a very close third but no one other than me here knows who they even are so askldjaslkdjsa)
15. What's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
Oh god, the actual main outlast au fic that really delves into how the initial prank on Hannah snowballed into climbing chrash being thrust into experiencing the events of the Outlast video game. Except that's not a wip I've even started despite all the notes and timelines in my head 😭
16. What are your writing strengths?
I do think dialogue is my strongest strength personally. I think it flows fairly naturally, to the point where I've sometimes gotten stuck on a scene and switching over to some dialogue either earlier on or just throwing a line in randomly will just unstick *something* in the brain and my creativity output stops being a blockage and returns to it's trickle aksjdhaskdhj
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
Literally everything else? Descriptions. I just feel like I can't describe things very well and so I'm always worried that my writing tends to read flat because of it.
Also, due to being told that I'm a waste of space, stupid, ugly, blah blah blah by like 99% of my classmates from like grade 1 to grade 9 my self-esteem when it comes to shit like this is unsurprisingly pretty fucking abysmal! So every time I go to post something new I spend way too long hovering over that upload button convinced that this is the fic that will convince everyone that I'm actually a terrible writer and they won't like me anymore lol
18. Thoughts on dialogue in another language?
Never had to use it before myself but it's neat when done... not right or well but, like, done to achieve something you've planned out. I'm not sure what ways I would use it myself, I think it would depend on what use I need it to have in the story itself.
19. First fandom you wrote in?
Oh Class of the Titans easy. Inuyasha is where I discovered fanfiction, but CotT is what inspired me to try it out for myself (my first attempt was uh, not great aksdjklasjdlkasj)
20. Favorite fic you've written?
Oh god, there's a tough question lol. Uh, probably between Baby It's Cold Outside (so hold me tight in your arms and don't let go) and Artificial though. Both are my babies, but Baby It's Cold Outside is the fic that finally started me writing again regularly since middle school after a like almost ten year drought. And Artificial is the one where I finally got to really sink my teeth into what makes my outlast au actually outlast and really get to experience a bunch of shit I had never really written before (torture (physical and psychological), whump, body trauma) and it turns out it was a lot of fun sdlkajsldkjaslkdj
Oh god I have to tag people to do this now don't I? Uhhhhh, @chris-hartley, @icequeen-07, @hannahwashington, @eurazba but if there's anyone else who follows me that wants to do this than please by all means go ahead! Share your work with the rest of us 💖
#god i'm so tired#i've been up for almost 24 hours now#so it this seems a little more trauma dumping than usual that's probably why aksdjalksjdljsad
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