#...at some point I should probably read the Kafka story too...

[pelahnar]

sometimes you read a book for school in 4th grade about a cockroach that wakes up as a human one day. And you find the book interesting and seek out a least one sequel; an even stranger story that involves characters bonding over their love of butterfingers. And this story becomes just "part of your childhood" that you assume most people aren't familiar with

then, 15-20 years later, you see tumblr posts about human/cockroach transformations, written to imply that the story they're referencing had a broad cultural impact. And you reevaluate - made that strange story was common knowledge afterwards!

eventually you realize that they are referring to a story about a man turning into a cockroach and that it was written 100 years before the book you remember, because the book you remember was actually conceptually based on the short story

it doesn't help that there's a side character in the book named after the main character in the short story

[throwaway-yandere]

A/n: ansy speaking, not her. Please. P l e a s e. Don't read ANY of the endings unless you've reached the end of the story in your own way.

Link to the fic.

Gepard Landau died on the same day you lost your leg. That was all you remembered.

His funeral was befitting a Landau. You didn't exit the car and simply watched from afar. No one knew who committed the crime, as far as everyone was concerned, you were also a victim of an aggressive assailant. Serval had done eerily good work at making you scarce. The visitors were either distracted by the fact you were just a few feet away from witnessing them lower down his casket or were too busy mourning over the loss of a great soldier.

Yet, there was someone who wasn't as convinced as the rest. 

Sampo knocked on your window that day, grating you with the happiest sounding "condolences!" he could boast. At the time, you wanted to punch his face in but feared you'd get an earful from Mrs. Landau. A no-last-name orphan like you can’t just buy a car.

You rolled the window down. Hearing him out was better than feeling whatever sinister emptiness resided inside your heart. 

Sampo cheerfully reached his hand out to shake yours forcefully. "Heyya there, friend! Long time no see, eh? Guess you can't catch me now, not with those legs, I mean."

You can't believe you laughed at such an insulting joke. 

"What do you want, Sampo…?"

"Hmm? Oh, nothing special."

The shady merchant rested his elbow on the car, giving you a lopsided smile. He radiated pure confidence, a trait you lack in those defeated times.

"Say, if I told ya I can bring lil Geppie back, would you make a deal with me?"

You scoffed.

"Bring him back?"

"Uhuh."

You chuckled emptily, staring away. The words that escaped your lips did not come from the heart, but it was the only thing you could insensitively joke about in response.

"If you plan on bringing him back, you might as well make him exactly like my type. Otherwise, what's the point?"

You slowly regained consciousness, your eyes fluttering open to reveal that you were positioned on a couch inside a dimly lit room. The air was musty and the only light source was a vintage-looking fan. We have received all the intel we needed, but Kafka was nice enough to watch the rest so you should probably thank her for adding this in our data bank.

A figure materialized in front of you. He was a dirty blonde man with a soft and concerned expression plastered on his face. This man knelt beside you and asked: 

"How are you feeling? I’m… I would like to apologize for yelling at you. It was not my intent to frighten you so much. I was caught up in my selfish emotions. Please forgive me."

You took a moment to assess yourself, noting that even though you were disorientated— you don't feel any physical pain or emotional distress. His presence compelled some sort of familiarity but your memory was frustratingly blank. 

As you tried gathering your thoughts, the sound of a distant radio static buzzed your ears. It was persistent. You strained to listen, but the man was oblivious to it. His blue eyes solely focused on you.

“... Are you alright, darling?”

You gave up trying to hear the noise and focused on your surroundings, ignoring him in the process. 

The space you were in was a deserted therapy office. The wallpaper, which had formerly looked rather professional, was peeling off and fading. There were lingering odors of mold and rot. The furniture was peppered in dust and cobwebs clung to the edges of the tables, cupboards, and walls. It simply wasn't a place to be.

There were remnants of the previous doctor inside— a torn chair, a used fountain pen, and most intriguingly, rowed forgotten photographs that have likely lived past the faces depicted. You swore you could recognize a person or two in those photographs. One had stylishly long blonde hair with blue streaks. She wore thick-rimmed glasses and a contagious smile as she lovingly wrapped her arms around an embarrassed young man and someone who looked exactly like… you?

As you gazed back at the dirty blonde man, it finally clicked. Though your memory fails you, you were almost certain he was the young man in that image. 

"Gepard?"

"I'm not–" He exhaled, soundingly resigned to his fate. "Nevermind. Yes, that's me."

Did you get his name wrong? Or was he just too quick to say no?

“...Was I wrong?"

"No, I could be him if you want me to be." He smiled weakly. “And based on what just occurred, I can surmise that is the case. I won’t try to be anyone else anymore.”

The radio static continued, stealing your attention once again. You turn to Gepard, desperation was evident in your voice. "Can you hear that? The static…”

He placed his head above his fist, pondering your words. "I... I don't hear anything. But if you’re hearing static, then I can only guess that Serval is overdoing her job.”

You raised an eyebrow, speaking slowly as if you didn’t want to come off as idiotic. “Serval is here?”

Gepard shook his head. “Not in the Back Alley, no.”

“Then what was that sound–”

“Just an old doctor’s device from the Xianzhou Loufu. No need to worry, (N/n).”

Gepard cleared his throat.

“(Y/n), I’ll have to go away for a while. Can you promise not to leave? It won’t be long– I’ll merely fetch you something to eat and drink.”

“But that shouldn’t be your responsibility. Having you do such simple tasks would bring me shame,” you shook your head incessantly. “Besides, I’m not hungry!–”

“(Y/n).”

He glared at you, feigning coldness. You were unconvinced but decided it was best not to test him. Gepard had always been caring for his people.

You nodded in agreement, your voice barely a whisper. "Okay, fine... I won't leave. I'll stay here."

“Do you swear it?” You’re not the sharpest person, but you still noticed how Gepard’s eyes lingered on the locks, contemplating if he should trap you inside.

“I promise.”

He smiled. 

"Good. Stay put and don't open the door for anyone. Dangerous creatures are lurking outside."

“Wait!!!”

As he turns to leave, you reach out, your hand instinctively grasping his arm. 

You nearly didn’t speak a word after. His eyes were dilated– afraid. But that fear was gone in a blink of an eye. You immediately let go of his arm. You had a feeling something traumatic had occurred that was similar to the action you had done.

Then again, he just spoke of dangerous creatures beyond this clinic. Perhaps it had something to do with them.

“...Please, exercise caution." You continued.

His gaze softened as his hand gently covered yours. 

"I promise, I'll be careful. My priority is to protect you, always."

The sound of footsteps outside drew your attention and your heartbeat quickened, worried about the aforementioned creatures in Gepard's warnings. Thankfully, it was just the man himself. He returned with a tray containing a straightforward supper. The aroma of warm soup and freshly baked rye bread wafted in the air, creating a cozy ambiance. Once upon a time, you would’ve politely declined this offer but you didn't sense any other noble birth in the room aside from him. Most importantly, you didn't sense Mr. Landau's presence.

He set the tray down in front of you, slightly ashamed about his delivery's lack of quality and quantity. "Here, eat. It's not much, but it'll help."

“T-Thank you…” You reluctantly took the plastic spoon. “But… would you mind filling me in with what’s going on, Young Master? I can’t remember a thing.”

“Master…” Gepard tasted the formal honorific and cringed. “First– what can you recall about yourself? What’s your occupation?”

“I’m a servant of the Landau family, taken generously by Mr. Landau’s endorsement.”

That man? Generous? As if.

“And the Silvermane Guards?”

You tilted your head.

“They are one of Belobog’s last bastions. Why do you ask? Has something happened at work, master?”

In other words: you don't remember what happened. To you, what happened around 5 years ago or so never occurred if you can't recall your time as a soldier. 

Serval's new device had worked, for sure.

Gepard exhaled loudly, “confirming” your suspicions.

“I’m not your master anymore, (Y/n).”

As you look at him now, something feels different. You were inclined to believe there is a merit to his words.

"Was I fired?" You asked, terrified.

He held your hands. His hands felt unusually warm and his eyes brimmed with an emotion you can't put a finger on. Gepard looked… hesitant, yet determined. A near oxymoron.

And he decided to commit to the worst idea he had in mind.

"... D-Darling, don't you remember?” He chuckled nervously. “We're not in that household anymore. We've eloped. We left everything behind to be together."

Your heart skipped a beat. You didn't take the time to think of his words and your mouth ran on autopilot. The Landau's principles were ingrained in you as much as it did to the siblings.

"Eloped? But... why? What about your family, your responsibilities?"

The sadness that flickered in his eyes was then swiftly replaced by a reassuring smile. "Dad never understood us. S-So, we decided to escape! To build a life on our terms."

That doesn’t sound like something Gepard would do.

But, if he would do that for you, then…

Foolishly, you still found yourself swept away by his romantic fibs of leaving everything behind for these flights of fancy. The stuttering happiness in his voice is infectious, and you can't help but feel a sense of elation. It's as if a weight has been lifted from your shoulders. Just as Sampo would've wanted for you.

… Doesn't that mean Gepard loves you as much as you love him?

"Why can't I remember that?"

"You must've just been too tired, sweetheart," Gepard muttered sweetly. "We had quite the busy day yesterday trying to find a safe location." 

"I... I can't believe it," you stammered, undeniably disbelieved and overjoyed. "W-We're alone together, just the two of us?"

Gepard nodded solemnly, looking to his left. His eyes were looking anywhere but at you.

"Yes, (N/n). It's just you and me now. No more hiding, no more pretending. We're free to be together, forever."

The truth of your past may be hazy, but the promise of a new beginning was exhilarating enough to discard any bad histories.

Gepard asked, slightly frowning. 

"But for this to work, I need you to follow my commands, is that okay?" 

"Okay." You nodded eagerly. “What is it, Young Ma— Gepard?”

“When I tell you to close your eyes, you’ll close your eyes. If I told you to cover your ears, you’ll cover your eyes.” Gepard slightly tightened his hold. “And when I told you to not question what you see, you won’t ask or try to rummage your head for memories or information. Is that clear?”

You were used to his authoritative tone. It was the mark of a Landau, it no longer struck fear in you as much as a normal citizen would have been. Instead of intimidation, you were informed of how dire these commands were, and you accepted without doubts much like a soldier.

“Understood. I’ll follow your commands to the best of my abilities.”

Gepard smiled.

"You're so obedient for me…" Gepard caressed your cheek with the back of his palm. "Just how can I reward you for this?”

"It's okay. You don't need to do that."

"Are you sure?"

"Affirmative."

He grinned wider and buzzed with happiness. 

"You make me feel so loved."

Gepard slowly cupped your cheek, eyes slit in a lovelorn gaze. His mind raced thoughts about your lips. How soft would they be? Would your lips feel chapped? Would he grip your shoulders should he part them open with his tongue? Much more ideas in that nature flooded his head, which only fanned the flames that heated his cheeks and ears. He wasn't sure how you'd react if he indulged himself— if you would forgive him for this— but he knew that if he didn't do it now, his curiosity and drive to keep you to himself will worsen.

He looked away, eyes childishly closed shut with a slight pout.

"(Y/n)."

You pretended not to know what he was thinking to save his pride. "Yes?"

"... Would it be alright if I add another segment to that list of commands?"

Just like his favorite theatre actress, your eyes crinkled as you put on a sly smile with good-natured mischievousness. Before leaving your hand pressed on your cheek, you adjusted a strand of hair and combed it back, angling your head at your best side. Needless to say, you were having fun toying with him. 

"Yes, sir."

"... G-Good."

Gepard cleared his throat.

"If I tell you to k-kiss me, would you?"

You chuckled.

"That doesn't sound like a command—"

"Kiss me, (Y/n)." He ordered, but as soon as those forceful words escaped his lips, he froze and raised his hands, attempting to take it back and sheepishly apologize.

That didn't stop you from taking him by his collar.

You grinned.

"Much obliged."

He released a muffled yet pleased noise as you pressed your lips against his.

As Gepard's lips met yours, neither of you cared for how dusty the place was or how eerie the surroundings were– it was only the two of you, alone in a gentle embrace. His lips were soft and tender as his thumb slid up the back of your palm, wordlessly asking for permission to deepen the kiss. You obliged by slipping your fingers through his hair– and that snapped something inside him.

Gepard instantly pulled you closer.

"M-Mhmm…"

His arms were forceful yet overprotective, enveloping you as though you were delicate. The warmth of his breath and his near inaudible yet high-pitched whimpers seeped into your very being. These served to make you feel safe and cherished. He tilted your chin up, faltering to catch his jagged breath despite how feather-like his movements were.

This is what the real Gepard Landau had always wanted.

This bliss is what he failed to attain.

Time stood still as you melt into each other. Gepard was savoring every moment– every connection between you two– before he pulled away breathlessly. With eyebrows furrowed, he loathed himself for needing air, but his expression softened as he caught you heaving. 

"I-I'm s-sorry–" he breathed in. "I s-should've practiced moderation."

His cheeks flushed more as he watched the silvery saliva that linked you both disappear, sputtering apologies for being "too rough" when he was anything but.

Gepard gazed into your eyes as you snaked your hands from his nape to his arms. He returned the favor, embracing you as the most precious treasure he's ever held.

With a soft smile, he whispered against your lips. 

You’re very obedient.

You’d do every word he says, wouldn’t you?

"T-Thank you for being here, for loving me. You're everything to me."

Then, stay here.

Never leave him alone again.

The soft morning light peeked through the thick curtains, painting the room in slivers of white and gold. Having no need for human necessities such as sleep, Gepard sitting by the bedside couldn't help but smile as he watched you rest. The sight before him was nothing short of wonderful. The soothingly paced rise and fall of your chest and the way your eyelids fluttered slightly in your dreams— mesmerized his unblinking eyes. He prided himself on abstaining from holding you for the entire night to not disturb your sleep. Gepard was content with simply gazing, without looking away for a single second.

Not once.

He won’t leave you ever again.

A soft sigh escaped his lips. In the “warmth” of this morning light, he knew that he was exactly where he was meant to be—by your side, in this makeshift realm.

He then whispered to you, knowing that you wouldn't hear them but wanting to express his emotions nonetheless.

"I wonder why Gepard used to deflect your affections so much. If I obsess over you then that means he loved you just as much… But there’s no point mulling over this, is there?" Gepard muttered.

As you writhe in bed, he carefully draped your blanket further upward, worried that you’d get cold. 

"Then again, unlike me, he has always been a man of tradition. He probably did not see it right to pursue a romantic relationship with someone under his station. A true Landau." 

The man’s smile disappeared. 

He is not Gepard. Not even his ghost. He is a manifestation of how the man desperately didn’t want to follow the family’s code of conduct. The true Gepard had always secretly wanted to break free from his shackling family bloodline but his father wanted to adopt you. And he couldn't bear the thought of having his dream spouse as his sibling either.

Despite that, the real Gepard had never resorted to manipulative tactics to control your emotions and actions. Not once has he tried gaslighting or using his position of authority to influence your decisions. Gepard was obsessive, but not unkind. He thought that perhaps letting you go would be a greater act of love. 

Such a “considerate” gesture failed. No longer do those sentiments matter now.

Gepard watched you sleep silently. As he fixed your stray hairs, he couldn't help but ponder over the subtle signs that your mind was broken. You seemed unfazed by the fact that you had both your legs, despite being paraplegic in reality. Similarly, you didn't react to how you’re wearing a wedding ring that you never had nor the sight of his arm, even though he had lost it before.

This alley you shared was a twisted reality. A merely distorted version of the past and present fueled by your desires and wishes– and you were lost in a maze of your own making.

Deep down, Gepard was disappointed that you couldn't see through the facade, that you couldn't recognize the monsters that followed you both as a manifestation of your psyche that wanted you to confront the truth. 

As he sat beside you, Gepard felt a heavy weight in his heart. He wanted to shake you awake from this dream, to make you see that the person before you was not him, but merely a reflection of your deepest desires.

But he held his tongue. He was far more selfish than the real Gepard, and that selfishness kept him alive longer than he did. Instead of breaking the happiness you and Serval carved for yourself, he stayed by your side. Thankfully, Serval is too caught up in her distress, thinking that she could save you from this alley. She cannot. The only thing she’s doing is making matters worse for you with that device of hers. But that’s okay. He would be there for you, even if you couldn't recognize him for who— for WHAT he truly was.

Gepard sighed wistfully.

You won’t get to know the truth.

And it’s for the best if it meant having you all forever to himself.

For this is the only way "Gepard Landau" can atone for his sins.

[ihatechosingnames]

Alert Theory!!! Luocha

I hope everyone did their companion quest for Luocha and actually got him on the Parlor Car because otherwise this is SPOILER.

To use with caution.

So, if you went back to check the video at the Commission you will get, first of the achievement for the hidden side of Luocha, and then this scene play:

So, Luocha got his coffin at his side (how? he went back to the inn to get it?) and he is also talking to it. That should be the Ambrosial Arbor?

So, what do we know about Luocha? Not much, he is a travelling merchant, so probably has a lot of names depending on the planet to make himself look more friendly. I don't know if there is a language barrier between the different planets, but definitely there is a cultural barrier. Maybe his name is too much different from the names used on Xianzhou that he switched on a more familiar name for his clients to use while on the ship.

We know, thanks to Dan Heng's side story, that Luocha was on Cloudport after it was closed for the emergency, and after Silver Wolf hacked our way in. Dan Heng found him alongside Sushang maybe 30-45 minutes after Stelle, March and Welt departed and met Tingyun that says "nobody else should be here", so he possibly came a little after the main team but before Dan Heng. If my reasoning is correct, Luocha didn't cause the Stellaron incident, since everything was closed because of the Stellaron Incident. Kafka asked the Astral Express crew's help because the Xianzhou had a problem with the Stellaron but it wasn't their (Kafka and Blade) fault (most likely they knew that was going to be a problem and needed the AE crew to be there for all the reason to get the MC powerful enough to fight Nanook).

But why was he in front of the Arbor before it was revived with the Stellaron?

He says "yes, none of this is our concern... The journey has only just begun to-" that can be read differently if you think he did revive the Arbor or not.

He didn't revive the Arbor: Luocha being there to do something about the Arbor being revived even if the conflict between the Sanctus Medicus and Xianzhou is not his problem.

He did revive the Arbor: the conflict between the Sanctus Medicus and Xianzhou, the problem the Arbor will cause, all of this is not his concern because it's only a step for a journey that has only begun.

If we take the complete phrase, the second option is the most likely. At the beginning I was thinking he didn't revive a thing and he was most likely a red herring to point the direction of the audience elsewhere, while the culprit did everything. But I find it's unlikely for Hoyo to do so, I mean, look at Dan Heng, we speculated about him being a dragon boy because there were hints about it and if we look now at certain promo images, everything fit. And here there are hints that says the Luocha did something on or near the Ambrosial Arbor, he is hiding something inside the coffin, and he is kind of suspicious even inside the Parlor.

So, he has sensed the Stellaron in our "possession" but it's different from the others Stellaron.

First of all, I don't think Luocha is Otto or Void Archives from HI3. There would have been an hint about it in his dialogue with us on the Parlor (since Welt is there!!) but nothing. Actually he doesn't acknowledge anyone in it, until we speak to him. The others interact with Himeko and Welt in some way, Luocha doesn't. Even Welt says it's possible that he is just someone who shares the same appearance:

and we have a very present example of this: Bronya Raad and Silver Wolf. Both share the same appearance but have different ages, different experience and different lives. Himeko herself is a different version of another Himeko, Seele, Bronya, Natasha... they all are.

From what I see, Luocha is marginally involved in everything in Xianzhou, but his appearance, the fact is hiding something, especially during a time like that, make him very suspicious and this could be something that Elio and the Stellaron Hunters are using at their advantage. He is also very powerful and most likely an ally than an enemy.

Basically my theory is that Luocha is a Red Herring, one crafted by the story so that we can focus on him and not on someone else. He is definitely hiding something but it's not related to this Stellaron Crisis. He managed to gain Dan Heng's trust so he was invited to the Astral Express (I absolutely think that The Astral Express got a consciousness and physically can stop people from accessing without an invite, different problem is when they are not physically there, like Kafka and Silver Wolf's hacking, or the Messenger for the Forgotten Memories) but he won't interact with anyone on his own.

What do you think? Is Luocha involved with this crisis or has a bad timing?

[sinkableruby]

more ougi spoilers. thinking some things

thinkin like... how doomed ougi SHOULD have been by the narrative. like all the signs were pointing to it, to the point where ougi herself (someone who has some very real level of mysterious narrative awareness and also someone who loves stories, something which CAN'T be a coincidence in a series literally called Story Series) believes she's doomed and accepts it fully. she's completely committed to her role, and to her role of being the bad guy.

and it's sad because like... in her "final" moments, she's so committed to it that she doesn't even show outward fear. she stays completely calm even while the darkness destroys everything around her (and after she admits she's scared!!)-- to critique araragi's lack of composure (LN line). as what is shown time and again for ougi, her commitment to the narrative robs her of the ability to express herself and live her own life. it's self-sabotage. and it's sad because. the commitment to the point of that self-sabotage is absolutely inherited from + a reflection to araragi's tendency for self-sacrifice. but not just that, ougi was an oddity created by araragi for a specific purpose. and ougi's personality was framed around it too-- their desire to correct comes from his self-criticism instinct (AC line). and they were born with the desire to try and fulfill their given purpose in life. meaning circumstantially, there wasn't really a way to avoid ougi being self-sabotaging. Ougi is Ougi so ougi was always going to be like this. they were Made to Fit a Specific Narrative Perfectly because that's what koyomi wanted from them. he wanted someone who would judge him. and so ougi became someone who would, at the cost of being someone who would be able to truly advocate for themself which basically means that ougi was doomed to not have a chance at self-expression from the start. but at the same time they are obviously like a person. in tsukimonogatari we see this most clearly: araragi asks her what she's doing out here alone in the cold. he offers to take her home. she says she doesn't have one, and then immediately backtracks and pretends she didn't say that. she says she's been waiting there since morning (it's nighttime). she's reading kafka's metamorphosis on her phone. she talks about why she thinks she's here, what her motive is. but she doesn't use 100% clear terms. she's grappling with her existence here, as we all do, and she's dealing with like how things kind of Suck for her, and how that kind of Sucks, as we all do. we get more hints of this periodically, like when she mentions she's tired in hitagi rendevous (but keeps on going anyway). this is what i mean when i say ougi needs nice things: they want nice things!!!! they want and like the nice things like any other person would!!!!!!!!! they are, in fact, their own person, independent from anyone else, with their own experiences (certainly araragi did not sit there in the cold for at least 10 hours reading books on his phone) who wants their own home and thinks about their own identity and place in the world!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! but their head is just too stuck in the ground to actually get those things for themself!!! and the ground is work and narrative and purpose!!!!!!!

recently i've been thinking of it like this: ougi the oddity, the role, the bad guy, and ougi the, like, person. who is obviously a person ougi as a person likes stories, likes all that stuff, so it's not like they don't get enjoyment out of what they do. but because they tie their value as an existing being to that work (see Zoku Owari)-- to Oshino Ougi, the pseudo-darkness, the Oddity-- the narrative-helping-along, the role fulfillment, they don't actually have much of a life of their own (even though all signs suggest they would probably want one). the commitment to the work is so full that any chance of autonomy or self expression is gone. hey. where. have i heard this one. before.

in a line in one of the audio commentaries ougi says she's married to her work and its like. yes. she really is. and it's not a good thing (she should be at the club)

thankfully araragi remembers to not be a dumbass and saves her. and she becomes oshino ougi. which in a better series would mean we get ougi stories and see them explore their identity and stuff but nisioisins a hack so they get stuck in the school forever instead whoops. catch me on ao3 where i write an actual ending for them and destroy capitalism with facts and logic and feelings

[zippocreed501]

AUTHOR EXTRAORDINAIRE

1. On individuality: 'Everybody has at least one story to tell.'

2. On interruptions: 'The only thing that’s bad for writing is being interrupted. You have to have time to write. And while that seems obvious, you're probably living a life with a lot of interruptions.'

3. On unused writing: 'Writers are like cooks. They keep everything in the refrigerator and put it all in the casserole. What doesn’t go in for dinner tonight, well, it’s gonna show up next Sunday.'

4. On staying engaging: 'There's only one rule of show business, or writing. And that's don't be boring.'

5. On brevity: 'If you can tell a story as briefly as possible, it's more dramatic. If it's too long, then it has the problems of pacing, it could get a little slow. But the shorter you can make a story, the better.'

6. On writing from diverse points of view: 'It's very important to project your own imagination into someone else—for instance, if you're a fairly young person, to write from the point of view of an older person. It's so much more interesting.'

7. On reading: 'I would say almost dogmatically that you can't be a writer unless you're reading all the time and reading with purpose.'

8. On experimentation: 'Writing is a matter of experimentation. And all writers do a lot of revision. So, first you might write a paragraph, and then you might rewrite it, and you might rewrite it again, and then you might write a page. And then basically you keep rewriting to find the rhythm and the voice that's suitable for that story.'

9. On building an audience: 'I think it's very important for writers, whether young or older, to have an audience—to have people who are sympathetic and supportive, but also fellow writers who have critical ideas and constructive suggestions.'

10. On having fun: 'I think one of the main things to remember when you're writing is that writing should be pleasurable. It should be fun. It should be exploratory. You should be writing about things that surprise you.'

11. On looking within: 'Writing is like a spiritual manifestation of something deep within us we don't really know is there.'

12. On giving a voice to the oppressed: 'Another very strong motive throughout history is bearing witness, particularly for people who can't speak for themselves—writing about people, telling the stories of people who have been muted or silenced or even exterminated, and being the one to tell their stories in some historic forum, or as journalism, or as fiction, or poetry. I think that's a very strong impulse.'

13. On playing with structure: 'It's very exciting to experiment with structure. I think that many stories are best told in some elliptical way or some unusual way.'

14. On journaling: 'Keeping a journal sharpens our senses. It's like an exercise in writing. If you're describing a scene, you are practicing the act of writing—which is very important—and thinking in language. Otherwise, you just sort of go through the day with stray thoughts floating around in your head of no particular distinction. But if you're writing things down and really thinking about something and observing, that gives a certain sharpness to your powers of observation.'

15. On the necessity of storytelling: 'There is an instinct in our species to tell stories. It's a way of explaining the universe and explaining our world.'

16. On learning from masters: 'You may want to read Faulkner, Hemingway, James Joyce, Kafka, Thomas Mann, Virginia Woolf. You may want to aim very high because the more you read and the more you're absorbing. When you start to write, you're gonna write on a higher level than you would be if you didn't read these people. It's like the old saying, ‘If you want to learn how to play tennis, you play tennis with somebody who is better than you.'

Author Extraordinaire Joyce Carol Oates

16 quotes on writing

source: www.masterclass.com

[thekitschdiet]

the kitsch diet part II

part one alr posted!! this chunk is about 3,000~ words long... let me know what u think :-) thank u all for all the luv already!!! looks like I really will hit 31 followers by easter!!!!!!!!

  Who is the Kitsch Girl? 

 I think this is more loosely defined, but The Chic Diet did a truly admirable way of reducing a girl to her YSL bag and her really skinny legs. Now, that implies an archetype, or a population in a specific location. I think kitschness is kind of the niche you fill when you’re not really much of anything else, sort of your own conglomerate of mainstream-specific. One major requirement, though, is being a little too into something somewhat uncool. And the whole illusion falls apart if you have any sort of outward insecurity. See, the Kitsch Girl is somewhat undefinable because she is so much of everything. She exists in multitudes, in a way that is also quite simple to understand; think of a list of axioms, or principles to live by. And now add a section to each one that says “but…” to make a collection of verified exceptions. Say, the kitsch girl will never wear jeans. But she thrifted this pair of vintage flares she just loves. She doesn’t reply to texts efficiently, but sometimes she will within a couple seconds. No mascara, no dinner forks, candles are to be collected not burned; but that was a gift, or something. It’s not personal, of course, those are just the contradictions she exists in. Don’t try to understand it, the enigma is essential to the facade. Or maybe she just lives like this, and her character is so homogenous with her inner world there’s no sense in trying to separate it. You have to have a little bit of an individuality complex about the whole ordeal, which is normally so eugh, but if you’re kitschy enough it works on you. Trust!The Kitsch girl is not someone unlikeable, but amiable and well heeled. I double checked that last one, assuming it meant liked by most, but apparently means affluent. I suppose that is an aspect of the kitsch girl too, having seemingly endless frivolous expenses with no real strain, but that’s not important right now. People that don’t like her think so out of jealousy, or something. Envious that her clothes are all kind of shake-it-up-esque and her highlights desperately need touching up, but she still seems so enthralled with the whole of life… How does she enjoy her own company so much when other people want to know her better? Doesn’t she feel weird about blowing people off to make a joke about reading Kafka in the bath? Why would she document her cluttered, unexciting life on Instagram so delicately, so vibrantly? Of course, no one would say this to her face because they are really baseless claims. She’s nice, generous, and valuable to have as a friend. Trade-offs exist, as they do with anyone. But I like thinking it’s easier to overlook a forgotten birthday when your kitschy best friend gave you a multi strand pearl necklace to celebrate the welcome breeze of June. Or some other made-up holiday. She is so unassuming if you’re not really looking. Girls want in on her inner circle. Or they just don’t care. Nothing wrong with being liked or thought of naught, for the most part. Boys are either enthralled or repulsed by her. Her doctor knows her as something of a hypochondriac, but only minorly. It’s just carpal tunnel, don’t worry… The sales staff at CVS turn a blind eye when she slips an eyeliner pencil into her tote bag. She shoplifts on occasion, just to see if she still knows how. But she is not a shoplifter. $9 here and $6.45 there doesn’t really add up to much. Everywhere she goes, she makes a tertiary friend or two. The term of friend is loosely used here, of course. But it is nice to tell a stranger you like her earrings. Or her phone case is so fun, is it Wildflower? The kitsch girl has an eye for this kind of detail. Simply put, she is sort of unspectacular. But in a way that makes you sort of wish you knew her better.

Phone cases

The phone case is, like, religious for the kitsch girl. Sorry, but there’s just no other accessory as flippant and expensive and single-purpose as a trendy little iPhone case with some semitacky stickers plastered over the design. I used to have an iPhone XS- extrasmall-  with like, 18 phone cases. It was kind of a sordid affair. I jest, but really… owning that many phone cases was kind of sick. We get it, you are frivolous and spontaneous and sooo stylish! Stop posting mirror selfies on your Instagram story, your crush isn’t going to see it. Kidding again. Having an extensive collection of phone cases is just so fun because while attainable, most people just simply do not partake in it. That makes you kitschy and unique. I really thought I had more to say about the IDEA of the phone case, but I guess in practice it is all very, very simple. You can slide your driver’s license in the back of a clear case. At what point does it stop being cool to have legal operational control of a vehicle? I don’t display mine because I don’t really like the photo. I look round. In the eyes but also just in general, swollen, unglamorous. Whatever. Not like I drive a Nissan or anything. I drive my *Mom’s* Nissan. Playing Bladee in the car seems sacrilegious. She would hate it.Back to phone cases. Sonix ones are cute but kind of overpriced retail- unless you have like, an iPhone 12 Pro Max or whatever the fuck is new this year, just go to Winner’s. They always have Xs and 11 cases. I had a cherry one for my previous phone, like the exact one Lana Del Rey had? Thank god I sold it before she got outed as a copfucker or whatever. Casetify is for an inadvertent flex. Flexing your lame, lame taste. Sorry, I know you bought it because you liked it, but what you failed to consider is just how un-Kitsch they are. SO common, and they advertise on Instagram. Sorry, I just can’t get into it! Kind of how I just never liked the Brandy Amara tanks. Or lowtop converse. Otterbox is just distressing. Like, if my boyfriend gave me an otterbox phone case I would probably break up with him because somebody clearly isn’t paying attention- one of my favorite, potentially overused joke is how Otterbox cases are the equivalent of orthopedic insoles. Sorry but if you have poor arch support or whatever, but no pain is worth giving up a good pair of Margiela slingback tabi heels. Obviously I couldn’t afford that right now because all loose income goes directly to Wildflower and my cig boy. But like, one day. I hope you want to punch me in the face a little bit after reading that.  If Wildflower isn’t your thing, at least have the decency to get a beaded phone strap. But not from String Ting. Pray tell you aren’t keeping score, but they are one of my several parasocial enemies. That should have been ME collaborating with Wildflower! Should have been ME mailing shit to Caroline Calloway (more on her later, but she is the only blue check I follow. I adore her! I was on her patreon for a bit I thinkl!!) …. Side note. Phone cases are cute but there is no way to properly protect your laptop without looking just absurd or colossally lame. The foam sleeves… ick.

Having the shittiest music taste ever

So like, here’s the thing. I’m an Apple Music user, which sort of reinstates my status as an unironic My Bloody Valentine Hyperpop Death Grips kinda gal. Read; volcel. My most recent conquest ended up being a huge L on my part, but also… I totally dodged a bullet. The guy had an iPhone 11 (female trait) and didn’t know who Rei Brown was, which just seemed suspicious given his Niche. I just know he had a “making out playlist” comprising entirely of like, Joji. Which isn’t a bad thing I guess but so unembarrassing it horseshoes back to being humiliating.Like I said. Having the worst music taste. It’s nice how subjective and deeply personal your music taste can be; no one really Needs to know you’re a die hard drainer. But there’s also no point in being a die-hard drainer and Not capitalizing off it somehow. I added it up and I have well over 150 hours of just Bladee and Yung Lean. Which is so yass? The more I write, using myself as a case study, I realize just how desperately jobless I am. And Yogenfruz isn’t even hiring! UGH!I think there is something very kitschy about liking hyperpop in the least ironic, least obnoxious way. Sort of feeds into a “I’m not like other girls” thing, but I mean… That’s kind of the idea of kitsch, isn’t it? Be a little different but also the very same as your lipgloss brethren?!Side note. If you make monthly playlists I am genuinely kind of afraid of you. That is just so organized!! I just make playlists with esoteric titles and then make a new one when I’m sick of the stuff on the last. I have exhausted most genres but I think my favorite is the “I’m wearing f****ng air forces and my teeth are SO white”. Guess what genre it is. Or don’t, but it’s probably what you think is. Okay, moving on….

Curating a scent

I like thinking I smell like mango and peach, Glossier you, whatever citrus is in that Lush shower jelly and mint 5Gum. But of course it is probably less distinct and just kind of generally fruit-floral-mint. Anyway. I think Glossier You is the perfect scent for anyone with a rather elementary understanding of the whole.. Perfume business. Every bottle of intentional fragrance I own was made via aesthetic choices… it really helps that Glossier You is so cute And so universal. Now, Glossier is kind of interesting to me because it really is at the intersection of cheugy and kitsch. Kind of basic, overplayed, unspectacular. But also…. Often popular things are popular because they are good. Glossier has excellent customer suurv, they ship SO fast (and no import duties! W!) and their stuff is just so sweet and nice if not unoriginal, in kind of the same way strawberry ice cream is. Which is still my favorite, of course, especially if there’s a vegan option. I was talking about Glossier. What the hell! It’s really worth trying out. A huge principle of kitsch is just… having as many possible layers and appendages to your composure as possible. And adding a signature scent just really completes that! When curating your own, I say this as a complete amateur, know-nothing; make it something that comes kind of naturally to Your Character. Like, I’m just not a Chanel No 5 kind of girl. Odds are you aren’t either. My bottle (before she asked for it back when I told her I didn’t use it, in exchange for a Nordstrom’s gift card) was from my grandmother. Ummm.. Yeah, I really have no expertise in curating a scent. But it is nice to have a signature. And having a bottle displayed on your dresser next to your aughties McDonald milkshake themed beanie baby and a handful of lip products is just way too fun! This is the kind of girl I am, everyone! Cluttered, but prioritizing pretty-delicate things!

Cheugyism

Cheugy is a relatively new word that has unfortunately wormed into my vocabulary to replace “uncouth”. Which I use to mean graceless or tacky, but if that isn’t what it means…. Don’t tell me. That would hurt more than weighing myself after a “feast” slash pastry binge at my dear Grandmothe’s house. Like I was saying. Cheugy. It’s sort of a fucked up concept to me because it is a critique on consumption, but not the pace or volume or magnitude of it. But rather… the idea of not being “good” enough at engaging in microtrends, or involvement in the fast paced fashion cycle. Don’t get me started on TikTok, or do, but… yeah,. No. That will require a cigarette because I’m so sorry, but writing a thinkpiece on social media is so lowbrow I would need to find about six ways to aesthetically counteract it…. Moving on.  I think the idea of cheugy is good, we really do need a word to simply and efficiently define “out of date/uninspired/lame”. But the way it is used to shame others for not liking the same trends or whatever is kind of gross. If you use cheugyism to put other people down and not as a neutral identifier umm… you will become what you fear. Sorry, that’s what happens. Some things that I think are cheugy or embarrassing, or just not part of my stylistic lexicon are… 1. Hooded or zip up clothing, or things with a large graphic on the back. Bingo if it's all three! I just can’t get behind it. Side note, my summer home outfit is brandy sweats and a tube top (Urban Outfitters tank I ripped the straps off) and a large cardigan that should have belonged to a stoner, but probably didn’t. I can dunk on bulky, uninspired clothes because I would honest to God NEVER be caught DEAD out of the house wearing any of it. I’m so serious. Next segment should be about the kitsch girl’s inadvertent affinity for diuretics. Remind me….. One of the ports of my laptop is dead. Not really sure what to do about that.

Eye makeup and what it means to me….

Personally, I am one of those people who never wears foundation and kind of has a complex about it. The kitsch girl wears fluffy eyelashes and owns a plethora of sparkly eyeliner. Or maybe she doesn’t, but she has something distinct and a little ritzy, if not haphazard. We all saw Euphoria and it like, totally imprinted on us. The way glitter sits on your face after a long day is so resplendent. When it’s shining and a little bit melted off from your long, semi-productive day… ugh! Just made for film. Pictures on film. But not the Prequel app. I keep getting fucking ads for it. But it’s so embarrassing. Like, isn’t the whole point of film the authenticity of the moment? The texture of the afternoon? Why would you fabricate that? Prequel is just so cheugy. More on that later. But anyhow. Wearing a ton of eye makeup kind of fits with the idea of film too I think. Like, look at you, in the moment. With your strip lash falling off! It’s all so tres-chic. Plus, for whatever reason, it’s kind of unique or notably dedicated to ~Pull up to the function~ with more eye makeup on than everyone else. Sorry, but it really doesn’t take that long! But yes I will gracefully accept your praise… it’s kind of like the dropshipping of complements if you think about it. Easy to source with little to no effort in the curating. Side note, lashes are like $20 for 40 weeks if you cut them in half and use each pair about 5 times. You could probably do more but I lose track. How the fuck is it almost June? I was trudging through the snow to check the mail for my Online Ceramics shirt just last week, I swear. The trick to cutting your lashes (the way I do it anyway) is pretty simple. Get out two lashes that are symmetrical. Find the middle and cut one slightly to the left and one slightly to the right. This means you have two sets (one set is a little more dramatic than the other but at least they are symmetrical) with longer outer edges. Glue this to the outer corner of your eye and you will look so Composed… obsessed with how this layers with three eyeliner tails (one traditional one pointing up and one pointing down directly below it, sort of like the tail light on a 2019 Lexus UX) and one below your eye, like a clown. Fun, irrelevant fact, is the first time I added this third tail to my eye makeup, my dad had just gotten home from the hospital because he was sure he had like appendicitis or something and it was actually.. Not that. Typical indie hypochondriac. He made me bring him cottage cheese on a plate with a teaspoon that evening. I put black pepper on it for flair, which he hated. Walking up and down stairs with a plate of cottage cheese is much more imprinting than most of the multiplication tables. Don’t forget to use a bright shimmer eyeshadow in your inner corner. It really opens up your eyes. I recommend Too Faced.  One time I got a little bit too high and tried to film an “editorial” makeup tutorial. You will never, ever, ever see that video. But I essentially covered my whole eyelid in the ABH shadow “palermo” and smudged out the edges with a tan Tartelette Toasted shade, coupled with my long-expired Milk Makeup holographic stick. Lopsided lashes and near-blinding eyeliner experience aside, it was kind of cool. My point is, you really cannot go wrong with an arsenal of shimmers, taupey mattes and a good eyeliner pen.

[sserpente]

Hiiii so I saw someone asked you for book recommendations and you recommended The Gospel of Loki. Any other Loki related book recommendations? Also, I'm curious, I've noticed now that you like reading, have you ever find a book that's changed your perspective of life?

cause, you know, some people said reading is life-changing but so far, as a person who doesnt read that much, I havent really found life-changing book and am not very happy about that😂

Heyho there, love!

First of all, definitely read the Eddas! The Poetic Edda and the Prose Edda (the latter of which is younger, easier to understand but heavily christianised) to give you an idea of the real Norse God Loki. Joanne M. Harris has written more books on our favourite Trickster (The Testament of Loki, Runemarks and Runelight) so you should definitely check them all out! Then, of course, you've got Mackenzi Lee's "Loki, Where Mischief Lies"! And in this ask, you'll find a list of books on the Norse Myths if you are interested (just scroll down to find the English translation of the ask)!

Reading is certainly life-changing and it took me quite a bit of time to find an answer to your question but to be truly honest with you, there are way too many different types of readers out there to pin it down! Personally, I don't usually read books that deal with topics like e.g. women's educational rights or tragic diseases (even though those are very important topics like so many others in our society) so I couldn't say a book has actively changed my perspective on life.

For me personally (and it's the same with movies and TV shows), books constitute an escape from reality. Romance is, 90% of the time, my genre for that, you'd never make me happy with a bloody thriller or a crime novel or a "regular" contemporary novel. If it doesn't have romance of some kind, it will usually not interest me (there are a few exceptions though, like The Handmaid's Tale for example). It's a bit weird to explain because there are very serious topics that relate to real problems in the books that I read too (take the Divergent series as an example: a corrupt government, cruelty, secrets, prejudice, "order" to the point of absence of free will, murder, etc.) but they are not a complete reflection of reality like Anne Frank's diary for example). Some people might claim that this is naive but reading something entirely different just wouldn't make me happy. And that's what hobbies are all about, right? They're supposed to make you happy because you like doing them--and that's probably the reason why I absolutely hated reading Goethe and Kafka at school. I love literature--but I don't have to like every genre and it would be impossible to explain why I enjoy works like "Hamlet" but hate the guts out of things like "Die Verwandlung".

I don't even have a book that I'd say got me into writing. I have just always enjoyed the idea of creating stories and fascinating villains and I happened to channel that through writing since I was in primary school when I learned how to write. What I can say, however, even with running at risk of sounding like a cliché, J.K. Rowling's Harry Potter was what got me into fanfiction and it opened up an entirely new world for me, especially concerning what I can do with my writing and where it could take me. If it wasn't for the Wizarding World, maybe I wouldn't be here on Tumblr today.

If you guys are interested, I could make a Goodreads profile and create a list of all the books that I really enjoyed (and trust me, that would be a very long list). I've been meaning to do that for a while anyway. However, it might take quite a while longer as 99% of my books are still in Austria and with the panini, I haven't been able to travel back and forth a lot to get the rest of my stuff to my new flat). Okay, enough talking, I hope that answer helped and feel free to ask me more about the world of books anytime, haha! ♥

[florrickandassociates]

TGF Thoughts: 5x03-- And the court had a clerk...

Hello again! It’s nice to have this show back. This episode was a bit less of a standout than the previous two, but I’m still happy with the overall direction for this season. More under the cut (or here, because tumblr sucks). 

When Robert King tweeted the episode title, I asked him if all the titles this season were adding up to one long sentence/story, hoping he’d confirm it and give a little more information. He did! He said it’s “in the Farmer in the Dell mode” and while I think I get what he’s saying, I’m very curious to see how it plays out. Haven’t been able to track down 5x04′s title yet, but the promo is out. (As of this morning! It’s interesting they’re not putting them after the episode this year; I kind of like it.) 

Kurt’s job is up in the air given the new administration. I think this scene exists mostly just to remind us where Kurt works and the stakes.

What month is this supposed to be in? The transition seems recent but no one is wearing masks.  

Kurt spots a poster asking for help ID’ing people at the Capitol on January 6th. He thinks he recognizes someone...

And now we’re in case of the week land. This case is about a small business owner whose business went under after someone created fake news articles accusing him of pedophilia.  

I think the whole point of this (kind of long) scene is to show that this case is a pretty small deal. Low stakes, inexperienced opposing lawyer. (Not even sure why Liz would be arguing this in court, but whatever.)

Tbh I thought this was going to wind up in 9 ¾ court.

Now that we have junior level characters, we get scenes showing that there are, in fact, people at RBL who are mid-level. Liz asks an associate to work on something, he asks another associate to work on it, she delegates to other associates, and they delegate to Marissa and Carmen. This work seems terrible.  

It’s so funny to me how this is probably more realistic than most of the lawyering on the show and yet it only shows up selectively. We only see the hierarchy here to make it clear that Marissa and Carmen are at the bottom.  

David Lee interrupts and asks for Carmen. He’s very rude to her. Interestingly, she’s hesitant to leave her grunt work and follow David, even though she must know he outranks the associate who gave her the grunt work.

“Why am I supposed to know you?” David asks her as they walk through the halls. “I don’t know if you are,” Carmen responds. “Why does Benjamin Dafoe know you?” he asks. She doesn’t know who he is.  

“Who are you?” Dafoe asks when Carmen enters. She states her name, again. “Why are you important?” he asks. “I don’t think that I am,” Carmen responds.  

Then Dafoe says his top client, and it’s a name that the characters all know. I’m glad this scene is free of any “he’s the white OJ” expository lines (that’s from Sweeney’s introduction) -- it’s clear from the reactions and the discussion of police and rape that the top client is a bad guy, probably a rapist. The rapist wants Carmen to represent him.

Putting 2 and 2 together, Carmen asks if the rapist knows Rivi. He’s not, but he’s at the same prison. As soon as Carmen says she’s representing Rivi, David Lee switches gears, understanding the situation and trying to sign the new business. He’s so shameless!  

Marissa sorts ALL the papers. There are a LOT of papers. I’m swamped. Look at all this paper.

She catches the associate who assigned her the task leaving for the night just as she finishes up, and cheerfully notes she’s finished the task. Then the associate mentions this was only half of the bills. Marissa does not like that. Since her goal in wanting to be a lawyer is mostly just to give her something exciting to do and earn respect... this hierarchy thing is not going so well.

Marissa decides that after her rough day, she’s going to stop by Wackner’s court. He’s in the middle of a case about Emily in Paris fanfiction and he’s very happy to see Marissa.  

Wackner’s night court has a program—it notes the sponsor is Copy Co-op (I thought it was Copy Coop?) and the paper products were also provided by them. And “there will be regular intermissions at the discretion of Judge Wackner.” It’s very theatrical.  

Wackner takes a recess and calls Marissa to his “chambers.” He asks for her thoughts on the case. “All they want is attention and to feel like they’ve won,” Marissa notes. Wackner’s on the same wave length and compares it to the Scarecrow’s diploma at the end of The Wizard of Oz. So, he makes copyright certificates and some minor modifications to each of the fanfic books. They say “I respect you and I love you” and that’s that.

Wackner catches Marissa before she leaves and asks her to be his law clerk—part time or full time, 10% of all the legal filings and unlimited use of copy machines. She is hesitant because she “doesn’t even know what this is.”

Wackner says his court is “the future.” Marissa turns him down; notes she wants to pass the bar. “You know why all these people are here? ‘Cause the courts and the lawyers and the appeals have made justice... unattainable. Out of reach. To anyone who doesn’t have a shitload of money to wait it out. That’s why Exxon beats out Mr. Nobody. Read Kafka’s Before the Law.”  

I just read it, and you should too! It literally is a page, but tl;dr, there’s a man who wants to get to the law and instead he spends his whole life trying to win over the first of many gatekeepers on the path to the law. He never gets through the gate.  

“Justice is only just if it’s available to everyone,” Wackner says. Marissa thinks about that.

As I said last week, it’s smart that Wackner makes so much sense. Hearing him say all this, knowing that it’s true... it makes it very easy to get on board with the thought experiment. Of course there would be huge repercussions to this kind of system, but it makes so much sense it’s compelling TV!

Kurt’s showering when Diane gets home, which gives her time to stumble across the WANTED poster and notice that Kurt has drawn facial hair onto one of the pictures. “Who is this?” she asks him. “No one,” he says. “Well, you drew in a beard and a moustache on him,” Diane notes. Kurt says he was doodling, but Diane calls him out as he is the “exact opposite of a doodler.” Kurt says he thought it was someone he knew, but he’s not sure. Diane pushes him to tell the feds. Kurt reiterates he’s not sure, but it’s someone he went shooting with. “Oh my God, then it’s him,” Diane jumps to (not incorrect) conclusions. Kurt says he didn’t talk that way; he’s a veteran. “Kurt! That’s the profile!” Diane argues. Kurt isn’t convinced and he doesn’t want to be responsible for naming names. He notes he’ll be threatened with indictment for not naming names and then only lawyers will end up benefitting. Diane is not convinced.

I think this is an interesting conflict for Kurt and Diane. I understand why Kurt is hesitant to speak out before he’s sure. And I understand and agree with Diane that it’s important to identify the attackers and prevent anything like that from happening again.

I don’t mean to blame Kurt, exactly, but I feel like all of what happens next could’ve played out differently if Kurt had been just a little clearer with Diane about why he was hesitant to ID the man. Like, the threat of indictment for not naming names sounds like some typical anti-government rambling. Saying you specifically are afraid that this will turn back on you and you need to weigh your options and come up with a plan first would put Diane in a very different mode, in which they’d work together to craft the best strategy. Because this man would’ve been ID’d by someone, sooner or later, and Kurt would’ve needed to be prepared.  

Diane stares at the wanted poster at work and asks Jay to find his identity. He’s on the FBI TEN MOST WANTED? Ten!? Ok!  

Diane shares the extra information she has—the gun range and that he’s a veteran—and Jay gets to work.  

Turns out there’s no money in the case that Liz, a name partner, is working on and Marissa just spent all those hours sorting bills for. I could’ve told you there was no money in that case lol.  

Jay IDs the guy very fast. He’s faster than the feds because they didn’t know where he shot. The range had his license on file, and Jay got ahold of it.

“Well, we don’t pay you enough,” Diane says. “Oh, I know that,�� Jay laughs.  

Diane says she’s going to think about calling the feds—it's definitely the same guy.

Marissa notes someone high profile (David Cord, who I presume is a thinly veiled stand-in for David Koch given the name, his role in the plot, and the fact that he is “David Cord of the Cord Brothers”) in the lobby giving a fake name and goes to tell Liz.  

David Cord is performing magic tricks for the receptionists (they don’t recognize him) when Liz and Marissa show up. “I knew your father. I hated your father,” Cord says. “Yes, well, he hated you too,” Liz says. He says he gave a fake name to see what the reception would be like since he’s kinda infamous.  

Liz introduces Marissa as one of the law clinic lawyers. Marissa knows what to say in this situation. Specifically, she knows that it is the exact right moment to name drop her father.  

“Democrats as far as the eye can see,” Cord notes. At that, Liz asks Marissa to get Julius involved.

More good expository work! (No, editor feature of Word, I do NOT want that to say “Better expository work,” that would change my meaning, go away and please stop grading my recap??? I don’t know how I brought this up but it’s telling me my score is 72%, so a C, and it’s driving me crazy. Oh, now I’m a 71%. It had me at like, 50%, because I had written “Wackner” and “Wackner” is not a word. No shit.)  

Anyway, back to the exposition. I like that we don’t get a line like, “Liz! David Cord, the Republican super donor, is here!” We just get to see Liz’s reaction, Cord’s hate of Liz’s father, and the line about democrats. Then it becomes clearer who Cord is.

Just noticed Liz is wearing an Apple Watch.

Liz stands for her meeting with Cord, likely to maintain power. Cord says January 6th changed everything to him and now he’s all about unity and loving America.  

Cord has something to say about Liz’s case, the one that’s not making any money, and he seems to know quite a lot about it. That spooks Liz.  

Then Cord offers her $12 million to continue the case for another six months (all of these months, seemingly, will play out in the couple of days the rest of this episode takes, but, whatever). He just wants them to go after the social media company that distributed the fake news... and Section 230.

Don’t know what that is? Now you do, because there is a Good Fight short! These work so much better when they’re actually needed (explaining concepts, etc.) than when they’re trying to force one into every episode (remember that Downton Abbey one? What... was that?)  

I was talking to @mimeparadox about this short and he pointed out that this short has a VERY clear POV on an issue that actually doesn’t seem to be all that straightforward. If you’re like me and only had a vague sense of what Section 230 was prior to this episode, this short is telling you what to think of it—it isn’t just explaining what it is.

I do tend to agree with the show’s POV on most things, but this is an issue I’d like to read more on. I love how Section 230 was something I hadn’t really read up on prior to this episode and now that it’s been on TGF I realize it’s something that actually, yes, I would’ve been interested in knowing about earlier. Is this because things that are on TGF are interesting to me because they’re on TGF or is it because TGF generally only discusses things that would be interesting to me? Probs a little bit of both.  

Diane asks Jay how to make an anonymous phone call and he hands her a burner phone. She calls the FBI with the rioter’s name. She doesn’t leave her name and then she dumps the phone.  

Credits! Did you catch there’s a Jordan Boatman in the credits? She plays one of the associates who passes down the grunt work to Marissa, and she’s Michael Boatman’s daughter in real life! She’s also been in one other episode, in season 3.  

I never get tired of these credits!  

The RL partners (and some associates who are on the case? I think these are the same ones who delegated the work to Marissa?) debate whether or not they should take Cord’s money. Madeline notes that he’s funded a lot of Republican campaigns; Julius notes that both Republicans and Democrats agree that Section 230 is flawed and this is an opportunity for unity.

Diane notes that the right doesn’t want to stop conspiracy theories from spreading, so is this really that bipartisan? “It would help if the boomers would stop falling for those conspiracy theories and sharing it with their friends,” an associate (I believe this is Michael Boatman’s daughter again) notes. That quiets the room and the partners all glare at her. Yeah, that was a kind of stupid thing to say. First of all, it’s just not appropriate to say to the partners, and it’s also, like, missing the point? If it’s easy for conspiracy theories to spread among boomers, maybe just expecting each member of that generation to suddenly have a millennial’s understanding of the internet is the wrong strategy? Maybe there’s some structural issue here? That maybe, just maybe, this case is actually about?  

The associate also points out that the internet is currently a place where people can speak out about sexual harassment-- “they repeal section 230, and there would be no #MeToo.”

One of the partners says he doesn’t believe that—if they regulate section 230, then newspapers can actually be competitive and there’s still free speech online.  

“We’re not going back to reading newspapers, grandpa,” some associate says. What the actual fuck, dude? Who talks like that to their boss?! It’s so condescending. He’s also wrong! “Newspapers” are not just physical things... reporting by major publications still matters and will continue to matter. Like, is he suggesting that in the future all news will just be random people tweeting things they think are true with no fact checking or curation? Sure, journalism is struggling right now—but I don’t think that’s because there’s a lack of desire for well-reported news.  

I am glad the partners call him out on saying “grandpa” and honestly I’m shocked he isn’t asked to leave the discussion after that rude remark. Unless this young looking dude is a partner too? But I don’t think he is.  

Julius notes that if they’re going to pursue this case, they need money like Cord’s. At that, Liz starts to leave the meeting. “We haven’t decided if we’re taking this Cord money yet,” Madeline protests. “Of course we are,” Liz says and leaves.  

Now that’s more like it! I’m not sure if this is necessarily the best way to handle this, but she’s a) correct, they were always going to take the money because it is $12 million and an issue of interest and b) using her authority. Should Liz be making decisions totally on her own? Maybe not. Does Liz making this decision and then leaving (with everyone accepting that she’s correct) cut through a lot of bullshit and establish Liz as the one in charge? Yup.

Diane says, “Ooh-kay” with a little bit of an eyeroll after Liz exits, but she’s still laying low. I think in a different season Diane might’ve tried to push back.  

Is it me or does Baranski get a lot of material this episode we haven’t seen before? Lots of really good reaction shots/tones in this episode I don’t really think we’ve seen from Diane before. I’m impressed there’s still new stuff after 12 years.

At some point maybe I will actually write the essay I’ve been wanting to write for ages about how TGF is still so relevant despite being in a universe that should be showing its age by now. I wish I could find the first time that I called TGW a period piece set in the present day (I know it would’ve been during season five) because I think that’s the key to TGW/TGF’s enduring success. The shows always feel timely because they try to capture the present moment (which is, of course, always changing) and don’t get stuck in any one moment in time. Further, the fact that the writers are always so tuned in to events and skilled at quickly reacting to what happens in the world makes them VERY good in a pinch, which is (I think) why they’re able to make the most of unexpected situations (Josh leaving TGW, the pandemic).  

Liz and Julius bring a suit against ChumHum to attack 230. Judge Friend is initially skeptical of their argument that 230 is unconstitutional; then she’s intrigued. I am too. This argument about the press is a very interesting one. I obviously have a lot of reading to do on 230, but my take after this episode is pretty much that social media platforms have to be held responsible in some way, but I don’t think it’s feasible or desirable for them to be responsible for every single one of billions of posts. I think there has to be some way to regulate social media giants that would allow everyday people to share things and speak out but would prevent the curated (even by an algorithm) spread of fake news and make social media giants accountable when there are very public bad actors using their platforms. What that regulation would be I have no idea. I just refuse to believe that our options are to give the social media sites full immunity or to regulate the internet so strongly that no one is able to speak freely because all the platforms are worried about lawsuits.  

Over at the VA, people are being fired. When Kurt gets into his office, Madeline Starkey (wait, are there two characters named Madeline in this episode?) is waiting for him. She’s still very quirky and scary.  

Starkey says the guy that Diane reported is now saying Kurt trained him on using assault rifles and buying ammunition in bulk. Kurt notes these were topics covered in a group setting, which Starkey knew—and what she’s really after is the names of the others in the group. (She may already know them, since she knows there were five of them.)

Kurt refuses to name names and just stares at her.  

Case stuff happens! (I liked the last two episodes a lot but it’s much faster for me to just write, “case stuff happens” for some of the scenes.)

Hey, surprise Aaron Tveit! (Not really a surprise; he is in the credits. But still yay!)  

I don’t really know why Liz and Julius are talking about newspapers specifically and not all types of fact-based journalism/press? I feel like their argument is most convincing when it’s about actual newspapers (especially local ones) but still would apply to cable news...

Marissa’s still hard at work sorting papers when the associate comes back in and informs her she can stop; they’ve changed strategies and everything she’s done is now irrelevant. She also says “I forgot to tell you” at the start of that thought, meaning that she neglected to tell Marissa this important information earlier and wasted her time. Marissa is not pleased and so she goes to Wackner’s court, where Wackner now has a deli ticket machine and is wearing super-sized novelty sunglasses. Why not!

He sees Marissa and calls a five-minute recess. In “chambers,” Marissa tells him she’d like to work for him part-time but keep her RL job.  

Wackner needs her help processing more copyright certificates. He’s priced them competitively at $20 and found that a lot of writers want these certificates, even though they have no legal value. (Neither do actual copyrights, Wackner notes. And he notes that if anyone plagiarizes, they can sue in HIS court.)  

“Marissa, I’m building something here. I want you to join me. I want your advice on cases. I want to bounce legal theories off you,” he says. “What are your legal theories?” she asks. “I don’t know. That’s why I need to bounce them,” he says.  

Marissa gives him from noon to 2 and 5-7, which seems awfully ambitious for someone working at a law firm!

“That’s how revolutions are made. Back rooms of copy shops,” he says, accepting her offer.  

Kurt is sulking in the dark when Diane arrives home. He lets her know about Starkey’s visit and she immediately goes into lawyer mode. Notably, this scene does not spend much time on how Starkey found out the rioter’s name. Curious if they’re saving that for later or if Diane and Kurt both know what Diane must have done or if Kurt think’s it’s a coincidence.  

Kurt SET UP A TOUR OF THE CAPITOL for one of the veterans in his shooting group, and that tour was ON JANUARY 6TH! I really do wish he’d told Diane that upfront.  

Maybe the long pause where Kurt refuses to tell Diane which congressperson arranged the tour even after she promises she won’t say is him letting on that he knows that Diane ID’d the guy? Or maybe it’s just Kurt.  

I do not like the dead birds in Starkey’s office, mostly because I do not like thinking about dead birds.

Starkey compares Diane and Kurt to the Conways.  

And now more case stuff happens.  

Julius gets to question a witness for the first time in two years! He’s a little shaky at first but then he does a fantastic job! Yay Julius!

When Diane arrives at the office, reception is filled with around a hundred teddy bears. “What?” she asks. “Build-a-Bears. They were sent to Marissa,” the receptionist explains. “Okay... why?” Diane asks the logical next question. The receptionist does not know.  

“This one’s a Marissa bear,” she says, showing Diane a bear wearing boots and a wig. It does not look much like Marissa and it says “Hug me.”

Diane looks confused and furious at the same time. Her look here is, like, a milder version of the death stare she gives Alicia in Outside the Bubble when she learns about Alicia and Cary’s plan to leave.  

“Why don’t we, meaning you, take all these stuffed animals and put them in the conference room,” Diane instructs the receptionist. She is NOT! HAPPY! The receptionist seemed to be having fun with the bears, but clearly the right answer was to have done something with them and... not to have put them over every surface in reception. Eeek.  

Carmen’s new client, the rapist, arrives at the firm before anyone can hide the bears. “This may not be the firm for you,” his advisor/lawyer (I’m not totally sure what this dude’s job is) warns.  

Madeline notices the rapist and glares at the receptionist. “I know. I’m putting them in the conference room,” the receptionist says, thinking Madeline is upset about the bears. She is not upset about the bears.

Diane finds Marissa, who’s working with Carmen again. She asks Carmen to give them a moment.

“Why are there hundreds of teddy bears in our reception?” Diane asks. Marissa is confused. Diane shows her the Marissa bear. Marissa looks horrified and amused. “That doesn’t even look like me,” Marissa notes, completely missing how pissed off Diane is. I don’t think we have seen Diane be this direct/no-nonsense in ages.  

“That would seem to be beside the point. What is going on, Marissa?” Diane demands. Marissa suspects this is based on some advice she offered to a client who was buying a Build-a-Bear franchise and thinks this is a thank you gift. “What client? You’re not a lawyer! Why do you have clients?” Diane says exasperatedly.  

Marissa gives her a look, and Diane immediately understands that she’s been back to Wackner’s court. “Oh my God, this is about that Copy Coop court?”

“Marissa, no. By participating in that simulacrum of a courtroom, you exposed this firm to malpractice, sanctions, and God knows what,” Diane says. If that were really true, she wouldn’t have sat there and argued. I mean, I don’t know the legality of this all, but I feel like it’s a bigger optics issue than legal issue if Diane and other lawyers are willing to even consider participating?  

“If you wish to continue your employment at this firm, you will never do anything like that again. Do you understand?” Diane says. She will not hear any arguments.  

I love that Marissa is the thing that keeps Wackner coming back. It’s a good plot for her, but structurally, it also allows the show to keep Wackner around without many contrivances. Wackner sees that Marissa would understand what he’s up to, she sees that he shares some of her frustrations with the law, and they both want to work together again. It’s not like suddenly everyone’s talking about Wackner’s court and all the cases somehow end up there or anything.

The receptionist, who is having a truly terrible day, comes into announce that Kurt and Starkey have arrived. “Don’t put them in the conference room!” Diane commands, knowing that the teddy bears will be there. It’s too late, though, because the receptionist (who previously seemed to be fine at her job if bad at recognizing public figures and understanding that partners might not find teddy bears amusing) has already put them in the conference room. I feel bad for her, and don’t think the other things were her fault, but I feel like she could’ve seen this one coming...  

I find the teddy bears HILARIOUS, mostly because the reactions to them are so funny. It’s kind of the same gag as the balloons for Lucca in season two, but I don’t really care, because I’m getting to see Diane Lockhart treat hundreds of Build-a-Bears like they are a real work problem.

Starkey jokes about the bears; Kurt is silent.  

The rioter from the poster is now accusing Kurt of coming up with the STRATEGY for January 6th, which Kurt and Diane both dismiss as bullshit.  

I could do without Starkey’s musical cues.

I can’t tell if Kurt is in trouble here or if she’s just pressing him to name names. Why wouldn’t she just have rioter guy name names if he’s so eager to blame Kurt? I guess maybe if the others were actually there, he might be less likely to name the names of his actual co-conspirators? Or, Starkey might already know the names (surely the shooting range has logs) and be using this to raise the stakes.  

No one (except maybe the partner named Daniel) is happy about the rapist in reception. “Since when are we representing people like Wolfe-Coleman?” Julius asks. Didn’t these people help both Sweeney (though I think Sweeney was in some weird police brutality case and they didn’t actually want to represent him) and Bishop? And Rivi? But they draw the line here? Sure.  

Ah, there we go, an expository line-- “he’s the next Jeffrey Epstein”. Almost made it the whole episode without one of these. I’ll forgive it since it’s so late in the episode lol.  

“Did you approve this, Liz?!” Madeline demands. Liz did not. Daniel wonders if that means Diane approved it. Liz doesn’t think so and calls Diane (who happens to be walking past) in.  

“I know, the teddy bears. I’m working on it,” Diane says when she opens the door. I think the teddy bears are a bigger issue to Diane than to anyone else.  

Diane didn’t approve representing Mr. Rapey either. She’s uncomfortable that a meeting was happening without her; Madeline notes that she is standing there specifically because they wanted to involve her.  

David Lee pops up out of nowhere with the answer: one of the new associates (not Marissa, “the real one”) pulled in Mr. Rapey. Are there only two associates now even though orientation was for a big group?  

Firth is gone, btw. David Lee is the new Mr. Firth. I have no idea why David would want to be STR Laurie’s guy for managing RL but... sure, whatever? David Lee is an effective antagonist, especially in small doses, and this allows the writers to keep him around and continue the STR Laurie plot without a key guest star. If STR Laurie is still a thing, and it seems like it is going to be a thing for a while, then having David Lee take on this role makes sense for plot. Otherwise they’re going to have to shoehorn him in to every plot somehow. At least now he has a reason to be around.  

Liz and Diane take a walk to chat. Diane is worried about having David as their boss. Liz says she has a worse worry—David Lee knew exactly when to come downstairs with information, suggesting he know what they were talking about. “Would he do something like that?” Liz asks when Diane wonders if there’s a bug. “Oh, yeah,” Diane replies. Hah, yeah. He absolutely would.  

They decide to have Jay search for bugs and Liz is frustrated with how much time they have to spend on things other than lawyering. Yup.

“What is going on with all the teddy bears in the conference room?” Liz asks as they head back to the office. “It’s a long story,” Diane sighs. I also love that the teddy bears link the various pieces of the episode together—it feels like all of these threads are happening simultaneously because of that constant.  

I don’t get RL’s approach to clients. Bishop and Rivi are ok, Wolfe-Colman is not (except that actually he is fine). Cord is okay too. Do they draw the line anywhere? I know Liz was right when she said that OF COURSE they were taking the money, but is there really nothing that differentiates that situation from this one? I feel like there should be.

Marissa goes back to see Wackner. Since someone refuses to say “I respect and I love you,” Wackner reverses his ruling. This is part of the “Bad Loser Law of last Wednesday,” so the rules of Wackner’s court are clearly a work in progress.

Marissa explains she can’t be the law clerk because of Diane. She tries to connect him with a real lawyer, still not understanding exactly what Wackner’s after. “You know just enough not to crush what I’m doing here,” Wackner explains. “A real lawyer will look for reasons why not. I need someone to look for reasons why.”  

Case stuff happens. I cannot read Cord’s handwriting. Liz and Julius lose the case because Judge Friend says what’s happening isn’t fair, but it is constitutional. (So here we have, at least in the show’s POV, a good and attentive judge who can’t make decisions that make sense because she’s bound by a document written before anyone had ever dreamed of the internet.)  

Cord is waiting for Liz in her office. He’s prepared to bankroll an appeal. Did they blow thorough that $12 million already? Impressive; it’s been like a day.  

Cord says they are definitely the firm he wants. Interesting.

Now Liz wants a meeting with Carmen, so it’s Marissa who leaves the room. This scene seems like it was meant to be a different day?  

Liz wants to talk about Mr. Rapey. Carmen is, yet again, chill about the case. “Carmen, is there anyone that you would not represent?” Liz asks. Funny, Liz, I could ask you the same. Being hesitant about it is not changing the fact that you’re representing bad people. Carmen’s just cutting the bullshit.  

“I don’t understand. Is there someone you don’t want me to represent?” I love how Carmen’s incredibly polite responses always seem very pointed. There is absolutely nothing wrong with Carmen’s reply, and yet it puts Liz in a place where she can’t dance around what she’s trying to say.  

“I’m just trying to get a sense of who you are,” Liz explains.  

Then Liz decides she’s going to help on the Craig Wolfe-Colman (Mr. Rapey) case, and they will keep talking about her career path. Liz, this does not seem like the right solution! You're worried about your associate representing bad people so you’re like, I know, what if I ALSO represented bad people? If your goal is to convince Carmen not to take clients like this, you’re kinda shooting yourself in the foot!  

“Are you worried about me?” Carmen says, again turning things on Liz. “I don’t know what I am about you,” Liz replies. Me either. Well, I know I'm intrigued, but beyond that, no clue!

All the bears have ended up in Diane’s office, where Wackner is waiting. He jokes about how his court is always seen as informal, yet this real fancy law office is covered in Build-a-Bears. Then he says he wants to hire RL—he's willing to pay. He wants consultation from Marissa (“consultation on legal issues”) and he’s prepared to spend a lot. And, if there’s one thing we know, it’s that they’re always going to take the money. So, they do.

I love that Wackner’s goal is to “perfect my little clubhouse of the law.” It’s a fun plot, and it also allows for the rules in his court to change (I’m sure we’re going to be treated to/subjected to a lot of whimsical gags around changing and ridiculous rules). It's also a good way to work through the thought experiment over the course of the season. It’s not like Wackner already has a system set up and it’s perfect—I'm sure we’re going to see his system run into issues and explore that more, too.  

Wackner monologues a bit here about why he’s running fake court, and he lets us know he’s going to monologue. Basically he thinks people no longer want to help people and are only motivated by their own self interest. He notes that no one talks about the Peace Corps anymore and asks the last time Diane heard anyone say those words. I’m sure I’ve heard a reference more recently but my mind went RIGHT to season one Cary Agos saying “Peace Corps. Belize,” as some kind of smarmy pickup line. This is likely not where my mind was supposed to go.

Wackner wants “A new Peace Corps. For America.” Diane’s sympathetic to that and agrees to take him on as a client.  

Wackner asks if he can take a bear. Diane instructs him to take two.  

Aaaand Wackner and Cord end up on the elevator together. Wackner hands Cord a bear, the elevator doors close, and the episode ends. Since last episode ended with Marissa and Carmen in the elevator together, I’m hoping this will be how every episode this season ends. I think using the Kings’ favorite liminal space to transition between episodes is kind of fun, and it fits with the ellipses at the end of every episode title.  

Speaking of... did you see today’s elevator-themed episode of Evil? It was written by the Kings. Those two have been obsessed with elevators for at least a decade.  

[grandhotelabyss]

Now that the “dunk” cycle has passed, I do have something to say about this viral Tweet. First, like all sublimely stupid remarks, it passes into brilliance. “Allegory of what” is a reasonable and even eloquent characterization—it would be a good title for an essay—putting in the vernacular Walter Benjamin’s famous description of Kafka’s works as Haggadah without Halachah—i.e., Talmudic illustrations of the law sans the law itself. What kind of sensibility does this offend? Well, let’s not defang the modernists—it honestly might irritate anyone. I myself have a somewhat checkered relationship with Kafka; I like him short, in aphorisms and prose-poems, and I think his masterpiece might be “A Hunger Artist,” an absolutely perfect story, which I don’t quite understand, except that it’s about me and my experiences, which I don’t understand either. The longer pieces, especially the novels, don’t have the same power, because the oneiric style feels forced and willful when extended. (I should say I’ve read a lot of Kafka but not all and never systematically, just in fits and starts between my teen years and today; my major omission is The Castle.)

Still, Dawkins’s remark also illuminates a larger phenomenon. I saw the other day a social-media inquiry, with what agenda I don’t know, about whether there was some continuity between Dawkins’s New Atheist movement and today’s wokeness. The answer is the opposite: official anti-wokeness, the Intellectual Dark Web, descends from New Atheism. But they share a sensibility, since both New Atheism and wokeness can be described, maybe unfairly but not simply in jest, as puritan sects. And what does the puritan want from a text? Governor Winthrop explains:

At Watertown there was (in the view of divers witnesses) a great combat between a mouse and a snake; and after a long fight, the mouse prevailed and killed the snake. The pastor of Boston, Mr. Wilson, a very sincere, holy man, hearing of it, gave this interpretation: That the snake was the devil; the mouse was a poor contemptible people, which God had brought hither, which should overcome Satan here, and dispossess him of his Kingdom.

The interpretation is so insistent and indisputable that the allegorical surface, here nature itself, is wholly dispensable. The New Atheist and the woke want a text the opposite of Kafka’s, one whose narrative, drama, style, and imagery are so morally legible that no “wrong” interpretation is even imaginable. Hence to the New Atheist, anything that calls for interpretation is irrational, while to the woke it’s elitist or crypto-fascist. American literature is the struggle of the puritan interpretive impulse toward complex artistic expression. This often results in amputated allegories, which is why Hawthorne and Melville often sound like Kafka.

Yet I’m sure I go too far. “Franz Kafka or Thomas Mann?” Georg Lukács rhetorically wondered—for the communist critic, the right answer was Mann, since he was (supposedly) a realist. David Mikics, reviewing a re-release of Mann’s Reflections of a Nonpolitical Man (which I’ve never read), reminds us of how Mann caught the character of the totalizing puritan by semi-caricaturing Lukács himself as Naphta in The Magic Mountain. Mann showed Naphta as a Jewish-turned-Jesuit Hegelian nihilist, which is to say that all traditions harbor their own oversimplifications. They always beckon us into the purity spiral. For nonpolitical Mann, that stolid German burgher and paterfamilias always about to melt into the Mediterranean, purity’s opposite is art:

Mann knew in Reflections that individual freedom, which he identified with the writer’s talent for playing with ideas, must stand against all political demands. It is on behalf of that life-giving freedom that Mann celebrates “art’s lively ambiguity, its deep lack of commitment, its intellectual freedom ... someone who is used to creating art, never takes spiritual and intellectual things completely seriously, for his job has always been rather to treat them as material and as playthings, to represent points of view, to deal in dialectics, always letting the one who is speaking at the time be right.”

The higher playfulness that Mann espouses in these sentences from Reflections perfectly suits his dazzling, many-faceted Magic Mountain, so different from today’s prizewinning novels, which present uplifting lessons endorsed by the socially conscious author and his or her tenure committee. In Mann, each character is right when he or she speaks, and the whole revolves in crystal.

A serious way of not taking things seriously—all those italics!—but still heartening. Mikics argues for a continuity between the early Mann and the later, though the author’s career is more customarily seen as a consistent drift from right to left. Considering Mann’s middle-period novella, Mario and the Magician, which exposes fascism in a wholly fascist way, and his almost unbearably excellent late masterpiece Doctor Faustus, a novel that criticizes the daemonic work of a genius while also being the daemonic work of a genius, he may be right. 

I am more interested in the irony that everything I’ve written above would have been considered looney-left academic gibberish at the peak of neoconservative hegemony and New Atheist ascendancy about 15 years ago, whereas now it is considered reactionary obscurantism. It’s no sign of virtue alone to be attacked by both the left and the right—three people can be wrong at once—but to be scorned by the puritans of all creeds for not writing stories with obvious morals probably means an author is onto something. To quote Lukács from before he joined the Party, “Art always says ‘And yet!’ to life.”

[bangtansfavwriter]

📚🌱book store owner! namjoon🌱📚

- you were still trying to find your way around town as you moved there like 3 weeks ago

-you spent most of your time furnishing your flat and getting groceries as you were snacking all the damn time

-the weather was also kinda bad so you didn't really mind

- on one morning you got up and it was surprisingly sunny outside

-so you thought "why not explore the city a bit?", got ready and went out

-after an hour or so that you've spent in a stationary shop, you noticed a cute book store that was right across the street

- you almost didn't notice there was a shop in there bc of all the plants and flowers hanging down the balcony above the shop

- that's why it felt like a huge discovery to you bc this was probably the cutest book store you'd ever seen, with a very handsome guy sitting at a table in the front of the shop, between some peonies and dahlias that were planted in raised beds

- the guy was fixing something which you recognized as a ukulele when you walked past him and quickly made your way into the book shop, when you heard him grumble and say something like "broke it again..."

-you shook your head when you walked in and forgot about the angry ukulele guy when you got the first look at the superbly organized and clean shop with freaking bonsai trees literally everywhere you'd look

- there were 2 kids at the comic section, some youngsters revising something at one of the tables inside the shop and an old man reading a book next to a tabletop fountain

- as you made your way through the store you noticed something else that made the store even better than you thought, because whoever owned this shop was a salty but funny book nerd

- the book sections were titled in a rather unusual way.. to say the least. one section, for example, was called: "books you probably hate when you start reading but when you get to the end you have an existential crisis because of how good it was"

-you walked to the next section, already curious to see what was next and were surprised to see pretty much the entire bibliography of kafka right there in the "love him or hate him, you ain't him" and chuckled, because you too didn't know anyone with a neutral opinion on Kafka, people either loved him or hated him for his work

-you, however, loved him and apparently so did the person who put this section together

-you full on started laughing when you saw the section "kinda overrated, but suit yourself" and saw "romeo and juliet" displayed at the very front

- "guessing from you laughter, I'd assume you probably agree with me" you heard someone say behind you

- you turned around and zoned out for a sec, as you mustered the gorgeous man in front of you who had the sweetest dimples you'd ever seen

- "you know... I'll get shy if you stare any longer" he said with his deep voice and a slight smirk on his lips

- you snapped back into reality after he said that and quickly tried saving yourself because you already felt your cheeks burning, and you didn't want him to notice that

- "oh sorry, I suppose I was just startled. you're very tall, you know? kinda intimidating with all that... height.."

- he smiled and nodded and you mentally slapped yourself for this statement of yours

- "you're right, by the way, about romeo and juliet. absolutely overrated story about dramatic teens." you said and put the book back "did you come up with these categories?"

- "yeah, maybe it's a tad bit too personalized, but it's my humble opinion about some 'classics' the general public is trying to shove down our throats" he said

- "like 'old man and the sea'" you said and started laughing when he shot you a look of bewilderment

- "don't you dare insult hemingway in this household" he said, but started laughing himself after he said that

- "that was by far one of the most boring books I have ever read in my entire life!!"

"but it depicts the long struggle of the old man who faces his struggles and realizes how they ultimately become his-"

"boooring! and hemingway got a nobel peace prize for literature? for that writing? you should make a new category in your store - 'got prizes but at what cost (hint: my patience)'"

-he broke into laughter and you physically had to refrain yourself from poking his dimples

- your felt your blood rush into your head again when he shot you a beaming smile and said "maybe I should make a new category. 'controversial opinions from a gorgeous stranger' - how does that sound?"

- you quickly changed the subject, because his smooth answer actually made you flustered - something almost no one ever succeeded in

- "are these all your bonsai trees?" you said and walked some steps away from him, secretly hoping he'd follow and continue the conversation you were too shy to make a flirt out of

-"yes, cost me a lot of money and almost a friendship, but these are my babies."

-"this friendship... there was a rather angry looking guy sitting in front of your shop. does it have to do anything with him?" - "did he have a ukulele?" - "...yes." - "yeah that's him. jin hyung is mad at me because he helped me carry that big boy there (- he points at the biggest tree next to the check-out) and I obviously couldn't see what was around me and I accidentally kicked his ukulele. apparently it's broken now, I don't know." - you could somehow understand the flower-boy's anger but the book store guy was cute so: "he shouldn't have left around a damn ukulele then?? i mean?? "

- you giggled as he blurted out "I KNOW, RIGHT?" while wildly gesticulating in excitement about the fact that a stranger agreed with him

- you both went silent after laughing together, the tension didn't go unnoticed by neither of you. you remembered what he said to you earlier and had to suppress your smile. these couple minutes you spent with this stranger made you smile more often than you probably did this month altogether and you were aware of the fact that this is obviously something very special. but you just moved here and had to get adjusted to your new life in this city, would it really be sensible to get a new guy this quick? hell, he probably isn't even single, right? with these looks AND that height plus these dimples that you highkey wanted to kiss?

- he interrupted your train of thought by just clearing his voice, which you were incredibly thankful for, as you got very tongue-tied that moment:

"I should probably get back to work..."

-that was definitely not what you wanted to hear and you clearly couldn't hide your disappointment, bc his eyes widened all of a sudden and he started fidgeting nervously.

- "I should go, too, then..."

-that was not what he wanted to hear either... he sighed deeply and looked around quickly before softly pushing you into an aisle ("yearning 101")

- your breath hitched, his breathing became rapid too, as there were mere millimeters parting your lips from each other.. he gently ran his hands up your arms and you felt goosebumps all over your body. the only time his eyes left yours that moment was when he looked at your lips, that were more than eager to meet his at that moment. just as he was about to lean into you - "KIM NAMJOON! You owe me a new ukulele, you airhead!" was heard across the entire shop, followed by the front door slamming shut

-both of you stared at each other in shock before breaking into loud laughter

- "Oh my god, way to ruin the mood!"

You rubbed your sides that started aching from laughing so much. "You should go after your friend, you know" you said and could tell, by the look on his, that this was certainly not his priority at the moment. He scooted closer to you again. "Tell me your name, gorgeous." - "Y/N..." - He repeated your name with a hushed voice, as if he wanted to keep it a secret from the world. The mere melody of name leaving his lips affected both of you in a way, that you knew you had to explore further. "Say, Y/N... Any chance you might come along again tomorrow?" - "Most definitely" you replied with a smirk on your lips. "Oh, that's a relief. That'll bring me through the day and dealing with hyung. Maybe I'll even build a new section until you come back." You chuckled and looked at him. "Surprise me then, Namjoon~" you teased. "Maybe something like 'books to read all night because you thought of someone cute'?" - "'Books I randomly put together after I saw the cutest smile on earth" may be an option, I don't know" - "Oh, you're getting bold! 'Books I should have sorted instead of blatantly flirting with a customer'. What are you intentions, hmm?" you retorted sarcastically and slowly made your way to the door. You laughed as you saw the slightly offended look on his face. "Books I need to convince a sweetheart that I'm nothing like Joe Golberg!" - "Books how to learn to let people go and then go apologise to people!" (You two were now shouting through the store, the customers were confused but smiled at you two)

"books I will never read today because I'll see you tomorrow!" he yelled last, before you waved at each other with a smile and you left the store.

- Namjoon was growing more and more impatient the next day, as he jumped everytime he heard the door open, but each time it was some customer and not you. He ultimately starting losing hope and felt a little stupid for actually staying up late and creating a whole new section in the shop, hoping to show it to you as soon as possible. The mere thought of seeing you again made his heart race, that's why it was even more disappointing for him when it was almost time for him to close the shop and there was still no trace of you. He heard the door again and sighed very, very deeply, as an old man walked into the store who was one of the few people Namjoon actually despised, because of his overly-specific wishes. And, of course, the fact that he never actually bought a book. As his life energy was once again being sucked out by the most pointless conversation ever, he thought of you again. He wondered if something happened that made you change your mind. Was he too cocky? Did you think of him as some player who just flirted with each customer he found attractive? He sighed again. "Young man, you don't sigh in front of customers! Were you not taught any manners!". Namjoon, with his best customer service smile, tried to convince the man that it was just him, being absent-minded and that he didn't mean to offend him (even though he'd have every right to do so). In-between all the hassle, he didn't even hear that the door opened once again. It wasn't until you called out for him, that he noticed you finally were in the shop, with him. He stared at you with a blank expression on his face when you rushed towards him and immediately apologised for taking so long, which was because of the moving company being earlier than expected. Namjoon just stared at you while you rambled on, as did the old man. You apologised over and over again and then excused yourself when you finally realized that you probably interrupted Namjoon while he was talking to a customer. "Y/N!" he called after you. You turned around and looked at him with a quizzical look. "There's a new section in the back... Maybe you should check it out." You two smiled at each other, neither of you wanting to break your gaze. "Young man... I think I'm gonna take this book here. You can never go wrong with the classics" the old man said and grabbed 'The old man and the sea'. Namjoon did his very best not to laugh in his face, only did he now have a smile on his face that he absolutely could not hide at that moment. Two victories in one day. This day could only get better.

Meanwhile, you went to the very back of the shop, curious about what would expect you in the new section. A book joke again? One of the things you were talking about yesterday? You lost your train of thought when you noticed a section, that you didn't pass by yesterday. "My loneliness is killing me", with books by Dickinson and Poe at the very front, followed by "I must confess, I still believe" with romance novels all across the table, decorated with peonies he was growing in front of the shop. "The new section is in the next aisle, love" you heard Namjoon say behind you. You hesitated a bit, kind of overwhelmed with how fast you could feel everything developing. Yet, everything felt so right. "Go right ahead, I'm right here", he said reassuringly, as if he sensed your hesitation. You nodded and smiled at him. The most beautiful table in the entire shop awaited you in the next aisle. Inbetween beautiful bouquets and absolutely dashing table decorations were Shakespeare's sonnets and other love poems that were among your personal favourites as well. You looked at the section title, written on a card that was put into one bouquet.

"Books that will help me ask you out"

💕

[rigelmejo]

Reading the Listening Reading Method articles and contemplating. Just some quotes. From here: http://users.bestweb.net/~siom/martian_mountain/!%20L-R%20the%20most%20important%20passages.htm

---

Read a page or a paragraph (in your mother tongue), do STEP 2 AND 3 one to three times and go on. Do it from the beginning to the end of the novel. Then start again from the beginning, it will be much easier. The third time should be quite easy or not even necessary.

The longer the novel the better.

---

What you should do in STEP 3 is

not just look at the translation but READ it before the matching texts in the recording reaches your brain, and try to simultaneously attach the meaning to what you're hearing, at least part of it, without stopping the tape (= audiofile) all the time. If you're not able to do it, you must repeat Step 2.

---

Example:

L2 German, the book: The Trial by Franz Kafka,

translated into Polish by Bruno Schulz (his woman translated it to be exact), the translation is very good and very faithful.

It took me 3 (three) days (30 to 35 hours of listening) to be able to understand every single word in the book read in German by Gert Westphal.

What I knew before I started to L-R it:

I knew the book (I read it in Polish, Russian, etc) and loved it.

I could recognize all the German phonemes and their corresponding letter combinations.

I was able to recognize basic grammar structures (morphology and syntax).

I could recognize in speech and in writing the meaning of some 800 words. (probably less).

(I couldn’t speak the language, I never try until I reach ‘natural listening’ stage. Of course, I would have been able to speak ‘survival’ German, if I’d been forced to.)

I used cassettes and two printed books, I had no parallel texts.

When I started only listening to it I didn’t understand anything, just a word here and there.

But when I started reading in Polish and listening to the German reader at the same time I was able to understand virtually everything, for a fleeting moment of course, I didn’t bother to memorize anything, I was just going with the flow of the soul shattering experience that only a masterpiece can deliver/provide/drown you.

As I had no parallel texts with matching chunks, I did the following:

(step 1 - read in native language, theirs is polish. step 2 - listen to target language while reading target language)

I read a page in Polish, I listened to German and looked at the German text, I paid attention to the meaning, grammar, and letters-phonemes correspondence.

Then another page, and so on, until the end of the book. I understood almost everything.

It was the first day.

The second day:

(step 3, and natural listening)

I only read in Polish and listened to the German reader and the same time. I understood everything.

The third day – I only listened to the German reader. I understood almost everything.

I worked ten to twelve hours a day. I made 15-minute breaks every 45 minutes. I did some physical exercises.

I had three meals a day. I slept eight hours a day. I was healthy.

And then I tested myself:

I took a recording in German – it was The Snow Queen by Andersen. I hadn’t read the story before, so I knew nothing about it. And... I understood it...

I noticed something very interesting about intensive L-R (and then natural listening) – after a while (two-four weeks, 10-15 hours a day), speaking (and writing for languages with alphabet) come naturally, there are only two conditions to activate the skills, phonetic training and repeating after the recording here and there while listening to something you understand and enjoy.

---

I don’t know how many words there are in Der Prozess (“The Trial”) by Kafka, I’ve never counted them. However, I DO know that you can understand each single word in the book after thirty to forty hours of “listening-reading”, provided it’s done in one go, to prevent forgetting and to do the right amount of good quality input. (Garbage in, garbage out.)

If you work on it 10 to 12 hours a day (I can do it easily), after a week’s time (70 to 80 hours), you’re able not only to understand what is being spoken (if it is not too technical), but you’re in a position to speak as well, enough to be able to engage in small talk at least.

In 70 to 80 hours it’s possible to “listen-read” 3 to 5 average novels, and that’s quite a lot. The first one will be a little bit difficult, but the rest will be much easier, you’ll be able to “shadow/echo” it (= repeat after the reader) at the same time, and I DO know from my own experience that when you’ve “shadowed” 3 to 5 hours, you can speak as well. It does not matter if you repeat every single word, it is the amount that counts. Taking part in a conversation means first of all to understand what is being said to you, and if you do, you can react accordingly.

A great deal depends on the “density” (new words per minute) of the texts you “listen-read” and “echo/shadow”. If it’s too low, it won’t be possible for you to put across your thoughts in a coherent way, simply your vocabulary would be too poor.

---

(mejo’s summary) Summary:

Step 1: Read a paragraph/page/chapter in native language.

Step 2: Immediately after, listen to target language while following target language text. Pay attention to: meaning, grammar, and letters-phonemes correspondence. (You should understand a decent amount, since you read the story first in your native language)

Step 3: Once step 2 has been done for whole book (though you could do this after each chapter), listen to target language while looking at native language text. Attempt to read it before the matching line in the recording reaches your brain, and try to simultaneously attach at least part of the meaning to what you're hearing. (You should understand almost everything).

Repeat steps 2-3 one to three times until you understand the novel well.

Test: listen to audiobook on its own and see if you can understand it.

Test 'natural listening': find another audiobook the same difficulty or slightly easier, listen to it. If you can understand it, you have gotten to a natural listening stage.

---

Another summary found here: https://www.jonkenpo.net/method-listening-reading/

The Listening – Reading Method

The order ought to be EXACTLY as follows: 1. You read the translation. If it is a text you have read many times in your life, much better.  You must be passionately in love with the text you’re going to study and know it well.  You only remember well what you understand and what you feel is “yours” psychologically.  

2. You listen to the recording and look at the written text at the same time. Because the flow of speech has no boundaries between words and the written text does, you will be able to separate each word in the speech flow and you will get used to the speed of talking of native speakers – at first it seems incredibly fast.  If you’ve ever tried to listen to native speakers of any language, you must have noticed that at first you do not know which groups of sounds form words and that the speakers speak as if they were machine guns.  The aim of STEP 2 is to cure these two small drawbacks, and at the same time to get some exposure to meaning, sounds, rhythm, intonation in L2.

*  If you already understand quite a bit of the text, can recognize the boundaries between words and the speed is no longer frightening you can skip to step 3.  If the speed is frightening you go on until it stops being so.

3. You look at the translation and listen to the text at the same time, from the beginning to the end of a story, usually three times is enough to understand almost everything.  If you’re a fast enough reader you can read much faster than people speak, so you’re able to know IN ADVANCE the meaning of what you’re going to listen to, and to be in a position to guess at least some meaning (with a good translation almost everything) of what you’re listening to. This is the most important thing in the method, it is right AT THIS POINT that proper learning takes place.  If you’re not capable of doing it without stopping the audio, you might decide to read a page (or a paragraph) and listen to the passage once or twice and go on.

Because of the IDIOLECT of the author the first 10-20 pages might be a nightmare for some, but then it’s getting easier and easier, the longer the text the easier it becomes, but it’s still the same IDIOLECT, variation after variation on the same theme, more and more celestial music.

[laemony]

What I’ve read in 2020!

Welcome back to this thing I started in 2017 and still don’t know WHY it should matter!

2017  2018  2019

This year has been a shit show but I must admit I’ve read quite a lot (who knew that staying at home with nothing else to do, except watching the world burn, could lead to this?!) Anyway! This is it, enjoy!

WAR AND PEACE, L. TOLSTOY – biggest book I’ve ever read in my life, I don’t know how but it’s never boring, I loved the characters and I adored the historical knowledge; the two subjects mix, when people are at war they miss peace, and when they are at peace they miss and look for war; it’s full of time skips in a very Russian fashion… only thing it bothered me, in my edition at least, all the paragraphs written in French didn’t have a translation, I hope I didn’t lose too many infos lol 8,5/10

PERSUASION, J. AUSTEN – this book! A surprise, a revelation, a discovery! Brilliant! Funny! Lovely! Anne’s expressions of her family are hilarious; one of my favourites so far, even if “lost love who is not as forgotten as you thought they would be” sounds way too much like the story of my life 10/10

THE YEARS, V. WOOLF – it felt lonely, yet lively; a bit hopeless, but not too sad; the chatter, the teasing, is all very familiar, as if she wrote about my own family; simple in its day-to-day life; felt like autumn (if it makes sense????) 8/10

THE DEAD SOULS, N. GOGOL – ridiculous characters, ridiculous conversations, I loved the ironic way it depicts Russian society and its people; the last chapter is a mess, I couldn’t imagine how it could end and to be honest I still have no idea 7,5/10

THE PROCESS, F. KAFKA – no time-line; not a single emotion, not from the characters neither from the author; a cold, indifferent depiction of a series of facts, which are everything but clear; not an inch of silence, just words; it tired me out, I just needed a bit more silence 5/10

THE WHITE GUARD, M. BULGAKOV – I simply love how he writes (wrote??) and his characters are always so unique and interesting; I adore the references to Tolstoy and Dostoevskij; this book has more of a painting than a book; it’s an impressive recount of a fundamental historical moment; the end is not clear but beautiful 9,5/10

THE HANDMAID’S TALE, M. ATWOOD – I thought I wouldn’t have been able to stomach it, and then I found out that there’s a right way to tell a story about violence and she mastered it; cruel people are just that, no craziness, no dark past, just thirst for power and the confidence of knowing what’s best for everyone; it gave me chills, it made me angry; I love how she writes, it’s the first time a first person pov doesn’t make me want to tear my eyes off my face… people who watched the series: do you know what’s the real name of Offred? I need it 10/10

PRIDE AND PREJUDICE, J. AUSTEN – as usual, her books must be read in one breath; Jane and Charles’ story is my favourite; I love Mr Bennet as much as I can’t suffer everyone’s sisters (except Miss Darcy of course); it has an amazing mix of characters, I absolutely love the drama that follows Mr Darcy; I honestly expected a more dramatic confession at the end but it was great 9/10

NOTES FROM A DEATH HOUSE, F. DOSTOEVSKY – a bit too auto-biographic for my tastes, but I adored his depiction of a humanity which is often forgotten; it’s very disturbing in its actuality if you stop to think about it; he never tires himself saying that those “criminals” are also and foremost human beings 7,5/10

ASYLUM, P. MCGRATH – the first part is fast-paced, it leaves you breathless and with an anxious need to keep on reading; then it started to be a little more psychological and it kinda bored me; I liked the narrator very much, it was really disturbing 7,5/10

DOCTOR ZIVAGO, B. PASTERNAK – every Russian book I’ve read gave me a glimpse of Russian history and culture, yet they’re all different and I think that’s often underappreciated. Now, this book. This book is, simply put, breath-taking. The landscapes are immense and colourful, the talent of this man is unparalleled; it has a devastating end, it’s a book I’ll probably read over and over again just ‘cause reading it is “such a sweet sorrow” 10/10 (this rec is shorter than what it should have been in my mind, but I’d probably end up talking about this book and only this book so that’s it, it’s called self-control)

EMMA, J. AUSTEN – at first I was annoyed by Emma’s character, but then she proved herself so oblivious it started to become pretty funny; I can’t get over how much people talk in this book, the irony is SO on point, I love it; I probably like it more than Persuasion, because there are so many twists that the ending left me really surprised for once. And let me tell you, Jane Austen is THE BEST at depicting insufferable people 10/10

UNO, NESSUNO, E CENTOMILA, L. PIRANDELLO – look at me, reading Italian literature, world must be ending… to be honest? I don’t remember much of it? And I didn’t take notes as I usually do? I must’ve been bored out of my mind… I’ll give it a 6/10 on trust alone because I know Pirandello is great lol

HIS DARK MATERIALS, P. PULLMAN – finally got to this and it left me pretty confused; the first book is great, I loved the characters and the scenery, but in the other two I felt like too many things were left unexplained and Lyra’s character too lost some of its greatness; the end brought very little clarity, if at all, and of course I hated it with a passion; I don’t think he expressed the maximum potential of the world he built, but I liked it alright 7,5/10

1984, G. ORWELL – saying I was disappointed might be an understatement; I like how it’s written but the story in itself is frustrating, frankly boring, and disappointing, especially the end; you don’t build so much tension just to end it like that! Tho, maybe that’s exactly what he wanted to convey; everything is pretty much hopeless, made me angry 7/10

CARRIE, S. KING – first of his book I’ve ever read, AND I LOVED IT; it’s not a style I like very much, letting us know how it will end since the beginning, but it was great, magnificent, empowering; I don’t know if I’ll ever have the patience to read the others (they’re all so big) but this certainly got me curious 9/10

JACOB’S ROOM, V. WOOLF – confusing, very confusing, more confusing than anything of hers; of course it’s very beautifully written, but I have no idea what happened there 6,5 maybe 7/10?

THE WITCH, S. JACKSON – my personal Halloween challenge begins with this; short, CREEPY, VERY CREEPY, to the point (what point?); absolutely loved it 8/10

THE HAUNTING OF HILL HOUSE, S. JACKSON – listen, creepy houses are my jam, they’re the best; my first impression of the characters went like this: they’re all batshit crazy, I love them; it honestly gave me nightmares; I wish I would’ve read it in English tho 8/10

THE ABC MURDERS, A. CHRISTIE – the queen of plot-twists herself, she never disappoints; not my favourite, mind you, but it was great how she built the story of the murderer just to… well, you’ll have to read it 7,5/10

THE FALL OF THE HOUSE OF USHER, E. A. POE – I love when short stories such as this leave so much space around them to build whatever plot your imagination can come up with; it’s great, even left like it is 8/10

THE PENELOPIAD, M. ATWOOD – whatever guys, this woman has the ability to write the worst things in such a delicate way simply out of this world; I ADORE HER 9/10

THE UNCOMMON READER, A. BENNETT – hilarious from start to finish, kinda frustrating in the way only royal etiquette can be; I love how the Queen relates to others and I adored her inner monologue; the end is brilliant and the whole book (more or less 100 pages) feels like a breath of fresh air 8/10

THEATRE

THE COMEDY OF ERRORS, W. SHAKESPEARE – funny, brilliant, it became one of my favourite comedies (and there aren’t many of them) 8/10

CYMBELINE, W. SHAKESPEARE – nice little thing, with all the ingredients of a tragedy but with a happy ending; for a moment I thought it would end in a King Lear’s way, glad it didn’t 7,5/10

THE TAMING OF THE SHREW, W. SHAKESPEARE – the first of Shakespeare’s plays that I didn’t like at all, and I think the reasons are pretty clear to whoever has read it; it kinda felt “out of character” for him, but maybe I’m just an ignorant 4/10

POETRY and LETTERS

ARIEL, S. PLATH – raw, powerful, sad, everything I expected of it, I also have the best edition ever, she’s great 8/10

POEMS FROM THE MOOR, E. BRONTE – the talent, the power of this woman; I’ll cry the loss of the Gondal’s saga for the rest of my life 8/10

LETTERS TO A YOUNG POET, R. M. RILKE – amazing, the thins this man could write even in such a trivial thing as a letter, I love him 10/10

MARINA CVETAEVA – I must admit, I like her prose better than her poetry; her letters are heart breaking yet so full of enthusiasm you can’t help but feel for her; also, she loves Boris as much as I do, her letters to him are my favourite thing in the world 9/10

BORIS PASTERNAK – this man was the best present this year could give me, do yourself a favour and go read him 10/10

SPECIAL MENTION: THE SECRET HISTORY, D. TARTT – I may have a problem with her books, but I’ve started this in January and never got the patience to finish it; chapters WAY too long, characters that are so insufferable they can’t be real; pretentious, boring… I can’t give it a rating because I didn’t finish it and I’m not a monster, but the bar is very low

This is it I guess! I hope I gave you a little bit of entertainment, this is something I usually do for myself but I’m glad to share with you every year. I wish you a better end of 2020 than the whole, stay strong and stay safe!  A virtual hug to everyone 💚💚💚 

[firequeenkitty]

TW: abuse and suicidal thoughts probably?

Really random think to talk about, but I feel like this is my mind dump place, I really like The Metamorphosis by Franz Kafka. Even though it's been quite some time since I read it, I just think about it sometimes.

Like, I remember having to read it for AP English 2 in highschool and all of my classmates were complaining about having to read this disgusting bug story. I would even laugh along and say "Yeah it's gross" because I was too embarrassed to say I liked it. When I read it, while there were things that were gross, I just felt a deep sadness about the whole thing. Maybe I couldn't put it into words but I definitely could relate.

I know it's supposed to be a big metaphor and what not but at face value it's just as sad. He was a young man who had wants and needs outside of his family but he kept to a job he didn't even like because he was the sole provider in his family and he wanted to help his sister whom he loved deeply. But the second he is incapacitated and unable to benefit them they essentially are just ready to be rid of him. It doesn't matter how much he's done for them up to this point because now he's just a disgusting bother. And yet even then he still loves them especially his sister. So much that when he hears her suggest they should just kill him and be done with it he just lets himself die and his family just gets to drive off into the sunset finally rid of him.

I grew up in a really shitty household because of a narcissist stepmother and enabler father. It didn't matter how much I did to be the "good kid", I was always the scapegoat and the problem child. I would do all the chores in the house on the daily and my stepmother would still scream and throw tantrums that no one helped her. If I even forgot something she would be telling my dad how horrible and lazy and ungrateful I was. And I always had to apologize for it. Since I was maybe 12 I had to "be the bigger person" so she could act like a child.

There was once a time that I used to carry my late mother's picture in my binder. I absolutely looooved this picture because people would look at it and ask if it was me. I would be so flush with pride because people thought I looked like my mother. But my stepmother hated it. She complained to my dad that she didn't like it, that she felt that I was comparing them, that I wished my mom was here instead of her. My mother fucking died. Yes I wish my mother was here are you fucking kidding me? But what did my dad do? He asked me to stop carrying it around.

There were times where honestly I wished my stepmother would drop dead. I though if she wasn't around my dad, stepbrother, older brother, and me could all just exist in peace. There were also times though that I wished that I was dead. I imagined that they would all probably run off into the sunset happy to be rid of me. My stepmother never saw an issue though. It was okay because she wasn't beating me or sending me out into the streets to prostitute myself. How can your standards for parenting be so low?

Sorry for the gross mind dump if anyone reads this. I have just been panic attacking a lot lately and thinking about literature. The Metamorphosis was just something that popped into my head that I could never quite articulate why I liked it and it made me feel so sad.

[drmedicsgamesurgery]

Danganronpa Togami Volume 3 Part 9 (Summary)

Thanks to @enoshima-pyon @shockersalvage​ @jinjojess​ @hopeymchope​ 

CHAPTER 14- I Don't Want To Be Like Cinderella

1.

The city of a hundred spires. The city with fingers of rain. The hometown of medieval rock. The spells carved on the forehead of golems. The story of the headless templar. The legend of the sword hidden at the pier. The sound of the military boots that once stepped on the cobblestone. Kafka’s lifetime. The aftertaste of the Baroque dream. "Pravda vitezi". My eye of the typhoon. All now at the center of the world. [1-9]

Prague.

I am back.

2.

Shinobu goes back to Prague. There, many UN soldiers are patrolling every corner of the city. Compared to them, the number of citizens who walk outside is very small. Shinobu wants to break through the soldiers to save Byakuya, but without Borges it would be impossible.

There are only a few cars, so she thinks she would draw too much attention with the old Skoda. She decides to leave the car and hide somewhere. It shouldn’t be hard since the city is basically a big maze. She walks on the stone road while paying attention to not being spotted by the soldiers. Shinobu wishes she could go back to the time when she wasn't worrying about her existence collapsing in on itself, when the concept of “I” hadn’t died. Immersed in the sweet memories of the never-ending, a poster flying with the wind lands at her feet reading:

 “Emergency Declaration:

 1. Byakuya Togami and his accomplices have breached containment at our convoy.

 2. Assisting in the arrest of Byakuya Togami and his accomplices will grant bonus awards; if you hide or assist Byakuya Togami, or if you don’t report spotting Byakuya Togami, you will be severely punished.

 3. It is forbidden to harm or kill Byakuya Togami and his accomplices.

 4. Now that Prague has declared a strict martial law State of Emergency, the specific details are as follows:

a. It is forbidden to go out at night before the situation subsides, no exceptions.

b. Restaurants, bars, cinemas, theaters and other recreational facilities are closed without exception.

c. Those who violate the ban at night and do not immediately identify themselves will be arrested on the spot.

d. Other regulations will be published through posters, broadcasts and other channels.”

 -Orvin Elevator, Captain of the World Health Organization Infectious Disease Control and Prevention Unit

 Looking around, Shinobu sees that several posters have been hung all over the city.

She wonders why the WHO wants to keep Prague under lock and key. Was it because it was the origin of everything that has happened so far? Or...was it because they know Byakuya is somewhere within the city? She couldn’t say at this point, so she decided to move forward. She arrives at the Strahov Monastery [10], known for containing pieces like the Dodo specimen, located near the Hunger Wall [11]. Shinobu theorizes if she can pass through the courtyard of the Monastery she’ll be able to reach her destination and Byakuya. However, the problem was that it would probably be heavily guarded. Since she lacks an invisibility cloak...or any sneakiness for that matter she feels as though she’s gonna have to win by using her wisdom alone. She starts thinking but realizes her ideas aren’t going to necessarily pan out in her favor. Call the police? Working with WHO. Get a disguise? Shops are closed and the few people out here would make dressing up a waste of time.

Not to mention all potential allies she could have used are gone now. Hiroyuki Ketouin? Dead. Pennyworth and the Needle Force? Not equipped to handle this. The 78th class which came to Prague (Sakura, Celeste and Hifumi)? No word on them after they escaped arrest. It was up to her and her alone.

In the gradual expansion of despair, the observations that tend to be hopeful will bring death.

“It’s so pointless. How utterly despairing.”

However, with the knowledge of war movies and video games at her disposal, Shinobu continues onwards crawling and hiding behind things like flower beds, even thinking of watching out for security cameras even though there didn’t seem to be any around. She notes at that point that losing Borges she also may have lost the grasp of her character at that point. As a consequence of her ‘everything is a battlefield’ mentality, this results in getting herself stuck hiding behind a flower bed and unwilling to pop out unless she finds a good opportunity to do so.

At this time, in the silent city of Prague, the sound of an engine suddenly roared. I decided to believe my instincts and rushed out of the flower bed and quickly passed through the courtyard. I hid in the bush next to me and observed the road outside the courtyard. A jeep turned over the road along the Vltava River and drove towards me. The United Nations soldiers saw the jeep and saluted. judging by that, whoever is in that car should be someone in a high position. The moment the jeep passed by the bush, I saw someone I was very familiar with in the car.

Kazuya.

And…

Suzuhiko.

My mind was in chaos as I was watching the jeep disappear out of my vision. Under the protection of UN soldiers, my brothers are sitting side by side in the city of Prague...? The two of them always had their own differing opinions on me. It was hard to imagine that these two people would shake hands and talk, and it was impossible for Suzuhiko to lose to Kazuya. He must have come to an agreement with Kazuya. That is to say, an agreement for Kazuya to recruit Suzuhiko, he held off his own self-esteem in order to find me and Byakuya Togami. For the object that he once was so hostile and did not hide his desire for challenge, he now shook his tail. While feeling guilty about this and Kazuya, I also learned a truth from it: in order to achieve the goal, I can’t take it now. The means of choice.

The jeep disappeared, and the United Nations soldiers stopped saluting and resumed patrolling. I turned back into the garden, went the other way out, and rushed into the alley. I once again chose to believe in my own consciousness, ran for a while, and finally found the jeep parked in the corner of the alley. Since I returned to Prague, I have only seen the one jeep just now, so I think this is the same one as they were sitting in. There was no one in the car. I was going to hide in the car before they both came back, but the jeep was too narrow and there was no place for me to hide. At this time, my ears caught unsuspecting footsteps. I thanked that Prague’s roads were made from cobblestone, followed the footsteps and found the back of the person I was looking for. I did not hesitate to say "Wait!".

When he turned around, his expression was a little surprised, and it seemed that he was not surprised by me, but that I actually appeared on my own. Suzuhiko concealed that rare expression with a smile, and still made unsuspecting footsteps approaching me.

"No use, Shinobu. Is anyone else gonna come out from playing hide-and-seek, halfway through the hiding like that?" snarks Suzuhiko. 

"I don't want to hide any more."

"Well, it looks like it. Then, what's the matter?"

"Let me say something first."

"What?"

"Be my companion."

Translation Notes:

[1] Prague is also called the "City of a Hundred Spires", based on a count by 19th century mathematician Bernard Bolzano; today's count is estimated by the Prague Information Service at 500.

[2] The city with fingers of rain: Prague with Fingers of Rain is a book written by  Vítězslav Nezval in 1936, showing off the many sides of life in Prague. Mixing real and surreal, Nezval evokes life's contradictoriness in a series of psalm-like poems of puzzled love and generous humanity.

[3] The hometown of medieval rock refers to the buskers of the city playing a unique genre of music to collect money.

[4] The spells carved on the forehead of golems. The most famous golem narrative involves Judah Loew ben Bezalel, the late 16th century rabbi of Prague, also known as the Maharal, who reportedly "created a golem out of clay from the banks of the Vltava River and brought it to life through rituals and Hebrew incantations to defend the Prague ghetto from anti-Semitic attacks" and pogroms. Depending on the version of the legend, the Jews in Prague were to be either expelled or killed under the rule of Rudolf II, the Holy Roman Emperor. 

[5] The story of the headless templar. According to legend, a headless Knight Templar rides a magnificent white horse carrying his own head. He appears on the cobbles of Liliova Street between midnight and 1:00 o’clock. His ghost is doomed to roam the city until someone is brave enough to stab the Knight through the heart with his own sword. Some claim to have seen the ghost – and some have even claimed the horse kicked them.

[6] The legend of the sword hidden at the pier is referring to the legend of Bruncvik’s sword. Bruncvik was an adventurer who came across a magic sword who would kill at just the command of the user. It is a story of tragedy with the sword ending up hidden near Charles Bridge in Prague.

[7] The sound of the military boots that once stepped on the cobblestone is referencing the Nazi occupation of Czechoslovakia. 

[8] The aftertaste of the Baroque dream is referring to the type of architecture used commonly throughout Prague's beautifully designed cities. 

[9] "Pravda vitezi" meaning “Truth Prevails” is the national motto of the Czech Republic.

[10] Strahov Monastery is a Premonstratensian abbey founded in 1143 by Jindřich Zdík, Bishop John of Prague, and Vladislaus II, Duke of Bohemia. It is located in Strahov, Prague, Czech Republic.

[11] The Hunger Wall is a medieval defensive wall of the Lesser Town of Prague, today's Czech Republic. It was built on Petřín Hill between 1360 and 1362 by order of Charles IV. Marl from quarries on Petřín Hill was used as construction material. The purpose of the construction was to strengthen the fortifications of Prague Castle and Malá Strana against any attack from the west or south. Originally the wall was 4 to 4.5 metres high and 1.8 metres wide and was equipped with battlements and (probably) eight bastions.

To Be Continued

https://drmedicsgamesurgery.tumblr.com/GameSurgeryDRTranslations

[thevagueambition]

I was tagged by @antirococoreaction to talk about five male characters I love

(God, only five? However will I choose between my boys >_< ?!)

This is most certainly not going to be a literary as your offerings, lmao. When it comes to literary fiction I mostly like Kafka and Kafka, by the nature of his writing, writes thoroughly unlikable characters.

This got way too long bc I’m incapable of not gushing about my faves when given the chance lol 

Zuko from Avatar: The Last Airbender

It is my enduring opinion that if you want to see a redemption arc done right, look at Zuko’s arc in The Last Airbender. He’s a scared, abused kid who managed to build up personal morals in a system that discouraged them, and was harshly punished for daring to voice them. He’s someone who always wanted to be good, but struggles with defining what good is, given that his culture and upbringing has taught him one thing, but his heart (and his uncle) tells him another, and his new experiences reinforces that. After he figures out what “good” looks like, he’s always held accountable for his past actions. He makes amends, and he accepts it, for the most part, when people aren’t ready to receive them. His anger issues, as well as how he sees himself as someone who had to be hardworking because he isn’t talented (however far from the truth that may or may not be in reality) are also aspects of him that appeal to me and indeed that I relate to. 

Anakin Skywalker from Star Wars

My love for Anakin is not dissimilar to my love for Zuko, though the quality of the writing in question certainly is. I love an edgy boy, is what I’m getting at, I guess :’D More seriously, Anakin’s story is ultimately one about control, which is a subject that interests me quite a bit. Anakin is never, at any point, really in control of his own life. He’s never really truly free. He’s born a slave, he joins the Jedi Order and he becomes Palpatine’s apprentice. He always exists within rigid systems of control, until his very lasts moments with Luke before he dies. With how Palpatine essentially groomed him, thinking of Anakin as equally a victim of Palpatine and a perpetuator of his (metaphorically speaking) abuse is also interesting to me. Certainly his clearly distorted thinking (eg convincing himself he can’t trust Obi-Wan, for instance) is also hugely important to his appeal to me. Also? He’s SO EXTRA I can’t with him lol 

(That’s your LIFE SUPPORT SYSTEM you turned off, Anakin!!! I know you’re depressed and dissociated and also The Drama but damn!!!!!!)

Nicodemus Ravens from The Shamer Chronicles (Skammerens børn)

The Shamer Chronicles is a series of Danish fantasy books for kids, and probably the most popular books of that type (particularly the first book, The Shamer’s Daughter). Nico is a major character, though never a POV one. 

Nico was, essentially, abused by his father for not living up to the male gender role. He didn’t want to learn to use a sword, he didn’t want to kill, and his father hated him for it. As a result, he’s a teenage alcoholic and profoundly at war with himself. He constantly have other people telling him narratives about who he is/should be: first, he’s the younger son who should bring his father glory, then he’s the heir unfit for the throne, then he’s, depending on the political position of the character in question, either a monstrous murderer who must be killed by the glorious leader or the rightful heir to throne, a hero ready to bring war to his enemy and liberate his people, then rule them in benevolence.

Nico doesn’t want to be any of those things. He knows who he is, is stubborn about it, but also can’t shake the belief that his relative pacifism is really just cowardice. I’m just going to quote one of my favourite scenes here (forgive the translation, it’s my own, I don’t have the official one at hand):

“[...] They want a hero, I think.”

“Is that so bad? It’s better than being a monster, at any rate.”

“You think? Have you noticed how often heroes die in battle? Of course everyone mourns them afterwards and write beautiful ballads about them, but the heroes remain dead. Stone-dead. And I’m in no hurry to get on my white steed and start slaughtering people until someone better or luckier than I sticks a sword in me. No, thank you.”

He looked both obstinate and shameful, as if he thought he really should get on his white steed and all of that. I could understand why he didn’t want to die, and yet… Well, I think I’d always expected him to return to the Lowlands to fight Drakan at some point.

“What do you want, then?” [...]

“I just want to be me,” he whispered. “Is that so terrible? I just want to be Nico and not a lot of other people’s hero or monster.”

Anyway there are Two Crimes when it comes to Nico: the fact he isn’t gay in canon and how so many adaptations turns him into the Generic Fantasy Hero he’s a very conscious subversion of in the books (the other principle male character is essentially someone who’s hurt by toxic masculinity as someone who buys into it, while Nico ofc is hurt by it because he doesn’t/can’t, so the series certainly had an opinion about it). 

Albus Dumbledore from Harry Potter

Dumbledore is, to me, someone who chose what was good for the world over his own happiness. He chose to be the one to dirty his hands, the one two make the terrible decisions, do the terrible things, that were necessary in the battle against facism. There is something very brave and admirable about that to me. It’s not that he never did anything wrong, he certainly did, but again, I think he was very aware of the terrible things he was doing, and part of the reason he keeps everything so close to his chest is because he doesn’t want anyone else to have to make those decisions, to have to feel that blood stain their hands. Dumbledore loves the people in his care profoundly, he loves Harry profoundly. And it kills him to have, as Snape puts it, “brought him up like a pig for slaughter”. 

Whether something is morally justified and whether it’s necessary to prevent evil are two different questions, and I don’t think Dumbledore feels particularly justified, but I do think he does what he perceives to be necessary to prevent facism. And hates himself for the decisions he takes along the way. And all of that comes back to, to some extent, his survivor’s guilt over the death of Arianna and the profound wake up call that was Grindelwald 1) turning on his family 2) being a very violent fascist, rather than just a theoretical one like teenage!Dumbledore was. In his mind, Dumbledore is already condemned for what happened when he was 18, so it’s better that it be he who takes the terrible things upon himself than an “innocent.” It’s better that he try to atone. Dumbledore is working towards a redemption he never (to his mind) arrives at. 

In regards to his sexuality, Dumbledore was certainly written with the trope of a “tragic old closeted gay” in mind, but of course JKR never made anything much canon aside from his “flamboyant” sense of style (that the movies have ROBBED us of >:( ) and hobbies, so to a certain extent, I get to ignore that homophobic intent. In the books themselves, the only thing you can really read between the lines is that Dumbledore was in love with Grindelwald, not whether it was 1) reciprocated 2) acted upon, so with only the canon, we also get to mitigate some of the Implications of “Dumbledore dated Wizard Hitler for a while”.... 

I mean I do Love Mess(tm) so Dumbledore having that terrible wake up call is certainly also part of the appeal for me. Personally I enjoy the interpretation that Grindelwald deliberately manipulated Dumbledore’s feelings. 

Captain Flint/James McGraw from Black Sails

BE GAY DO CRIME BE GAY DO CRIME BE GAY DO CRIME BE-- *coughs*

As you might guess from my description of Dumbledore, a lot of the reasons I love Flint are similar to why I love Dumbledore (and Solas, but we won’t go in to Solas rn lol). Flint is also someone who chooses to do the terrible, necessary things, who chooses the fight over his personal moral cleanliness. In a more obvious and extreme way than Dumbledore, certainly, but the principle is essentially the same. Of course, Flint’s fight is personal in a completely different way from how Dumbledore’s is. Flint’s fight is simoultaneously his revenge, a fight against the corrupt system that ruined his life and a fight for something better. Dumbledore is defensive, Flint is offensive. 

The self-integrity he has is truly amazing. He’s cast aside by everyone but Miranda, and yet he never starts thinking he has anything to apologise for. To ask for a pardon would be to ask for forgiveness, and he doesn’t think he needs to be forgiven. Not for loving Thomas, not for anything he did while he was still English. He perceives the reality of the situation, he sees what is right and what is wrong, and he knows that he is the wronged party. He stares at the behemoth of the entire social structure of his world and says: No. You move. I am not in the wrong. England should apologise to me.

Flint is my angry gay dad and I love him. 

I tag (as always, completely optional ^^ ): @teddy-stonehill​ @thebearmuse​ @andvaka​ @solitarelee​ @gallifreyanathearts​ @sinni-ok-sessi​ @melle93​ @papanden​ @seimsisk​

I feel a bit dishonest leaving Grantaire off of this list, lmao, but I talk about him enough as it is. 

Other honorables mentions go to: Enjolras (Les Mis), Captain Jack Harkness (Doctor Who/Torchwood), Solas (Dragon Age), Fitzwilliam Darcy (Pride and Prejudice), Kim Kitsuragi (Disco Elysium), Harry Potter, Remus Lupin (Harry Potter) and my soap boys Robert Sugden (Emmerdale), Richard “Ringo” Beckmann (Unter Uns) and Ben Mitchell (Eastenders). 

[afinepricklypear]

Compare and Contrast: K Project vs. Bungou Stray Dogs - Part 2

Read Part 1

Story

In general, K Project does a lot better job of maintaining a consistent and focused story, especially in Seasons 1 and 2 than BSD, with almost no filler content.  There aren’t nearly as many open plot threads or divergences from the main story, and everyone introduced has a very cohesive purpose to the plot. This may largely be due to the fact that K was originally envisioned as a complete story, with the movie Return of Kings and season 2’s Missing Kings and other added materials being, somewhat, after thoughts consequently ordered due to the popularity of the show. Season 2 does offer a very decisive end to the tale, with the destruction of the Dresden Slate, mysterious source of all supernatural power. On the other hand, BSD is an ongoing serialized manga with no set beginning or ending that we, as the audience, are aware.  BSD’s author, Asagiri Kafka, isn’t telling a self-contained story with a determined beginning, middle, and end, so often times characters and plot devices are introduced which may not have bearing on the current arc of the story, they hint at things to come. This might be frustrating for viewers that aren’t interested in long-term serialized works, which does have the tendency to fall victim to filler episodes in attempt to make a certain quota or make up for any lulls in the story.

That being said, BSD, thus far, does a lot better with world.

In K, the concepts of Clans and Kings, the Dresden Slate, and the Swords of Damocles are never fully fleshed out satisfactorily, to the point that aspects of it feel completely illogical, convoluted, and conveniently there merely to move the plot forward. Fantasy stories are generally under no obligation to provide explanations for where magic abilities come from, K makes an attempt with the Dresden Slate, but overreaches with an established protocol of Kings and Clans in regards to these powers with no explanation for where or why these rules manifested or why anyone feels obligated to follow them. For example, the Red King Mikoto is not shown to care too much for being a King, or even wanting obligations to his Clan, yet he maintains it and his Clansmen show loyalty to it, and there’s no explanation beyond “well that’s just the way the Dresden Slate works”.  That would be fine, if this wasn’t established as the expectation of anyone who is “awoken” as a King. In that same vein, a lot isn’t really clarified in terms of what really happens to Clansmen when their King dies (Clansmen are shown to still maintain powers granted from their former King but that’s just speculation from viewers, and doesn’t make sense if there powers stem from their Kings) and what is meant to happen when a new King takes their place (though we do see Clansmen turn on the new Blue King, in regards to Munakata taking over Jin Hibari’s role, or choosing to continue following the new Red King, as we see in HOMRA with Anne taking Mikoto’s place). Worse, these rules are just universally known in a world that isn’t supposed to know about these Clans and Kings, leaving no one to explain these rules to newly awakened Kings although these rules are shown to be universally known and accepted by them. More questions than answers are raised.

In BSD, people being born with or manifesting abilities is shown to just be a facet of this world. It’s just one of the physical laws, much like how the sky is blue, grass is green, some people can conjure demons that kill you. This is just the world they live in, and in that sense, the people in this world are the ones that determine the rules that govern these abilities without expectation. This treats us to various different ideas and philosophies for how ability users should apply their abilities or how the users themselves should be managed. The government attempts to regulate ability users, through licensure for organizations that wish to operate as ability user specific. This provided a cool storyline where we see Port Mafia obtain its license to operate as an ability user organization during the Dark Era, through nefarious plotting on leader, Mori’s part, which also highlighted that the Port Mafia is a criminal organization because prior to obtaining this license they were operating without one. We also see the Armed Detective Agency undergo a plot to take their license away, and since they are the morally upright group, in their minds, losing their license means they will cease to exist. This places explanation firmly on the goals of their given society, something that is relatable and understandable for readers, and shifts it away from the realm of unexplainable and increasingly convoluted magic.

On the flipside of that, however, K does a much better job of balancing powers. Which brings me Nakahara Chuuya.

I’ll throw this disclaimer in here, Chuuya is my favorite character. I fell in love at first sight. Unfortunately, he gets little to no screen time, I could count on one hand his number of appearances throughout the first two seasons. He gets three episodes at the start of Season 3 that explores his history with Dazai, and I feel I’m in no way biased (**cough, cough** 100% biased) saying these are the best three episodes of the season. Then we see him maybe in two more episodes until he gets trapped in a book for the rest of the season, leaving me screaming furiously at the screen. Manga chapters that go beyond where the anime left off are not filling me with much hope for more Chuuya in Season 4. Seriously, I don’t recommend loving this character, you’ll only get your heart broken.

The problem with Chuuya that becomes rampant throughout BSD in other characters, is that he’s a side character for a rival organization and he is super OP. Since the creator seems adamantly against making him a more main character (either as antagonist or protagonist…hell, majority of his appearances have been to literally save the day for the heroes), not to mention the lack of anyone in our heroes’ corner that could reasonably take him on (even Dazai is outmatched despite his nullifying ability, because Chuuya also happens to be Port Mafia’s best martial artist) the only recourse is to leave him conveniently absent from majority of the story. Which, okay, this can mostly be explained away that he’s an Executive in Port Mafia and probably has a lot to deal with in terms of making sure their operations continue to move smoothly, but it leads to ludicrous scenarios such as the end of the Guild Arc when a whale sized airship is being dropped on Yokohama by the Guild. We’re told this ship will wipe out a large portion of the city. At this point, the Detective Agency and Port Mafia are on semi-good terms in order to stand against their common enemy, the Guild. You would think, large object being dropped on the city, Port Mafia has a powerful gravity manipulator on staff...one phone call to Dr. Mori, “Hey...do you mind sending Chuuya to take care of that whale bomb....or are you just cool with the city being flattened?” All Chuuya needs to do is parachute down, once he touches the ship, he could tear the whole thing apart and fling its pieces to every side of the ocean. They call it a day in thirty seconds, tops, back home for dinner. Yet, for some odd reason, the course of action that the Armed Detective Agency decides on is to send rookie agent tiger boy to infiltrate the ship and fight his way to a possible transponder they can use to reverse the ship���s course, despite having little experience, and no specialized abilities for the task, let’s not get started on the ridiculousness of that transponder anyways. This decision is based largely on the fact he once was held prisoner on the ship and so…should know his way around? I get that they supposedly don’t want to owe Port Mafia, but this kind of seemed like an odd time to play loose and fast with the city’s safety. The point is, Chuuya is powerful, which makes his lack of presence during crucial moments pretty heavy handed.

That being said, however, this OP situation, is a problem throughout with other characters as well. There’s no balance of powers, and characters are shown to do things that don’t fall within the realm of their abilities, may never have previously been display or given proper explanation prior to introduction, and sometimes comes across as just thrown in last minute as a plot device. A few examples, able to transform into a tiger also, somehow allows Atsushi to heal at a rapid level and regrow limbs. Forget about the implications that he’s got some “special” light attached to his ability, as well. In a recent chapter of the manga, we see a newly introduced character, one of the Hunting Dogs, slap a bullet out of the air and stop a large projectile with her bare hands. Her ability, however, is age manipulation so there’s no given reason why she should’ve been able to do those things. While it is mentioned that the Hunting Dogs are also genetically engineered, she did this to save another Hunting Dog who is duly is surprised by her actions and expresses that he could not have done the same. I’m baffled. This is to say nothing of the multiple time characters without regenerative or durable abilities are stabbed, blown up, and impaled, only to walk it off like it’s nothing. The Agency healer, Yosano, has an ability called Thou Shalt Not Die, she can heal someone but only when they’re on the brink of death, so her ability is essentially that trope in action films where the bomb is always disarmed with one second to spare. Let’s not even talk about the new revelation that Dazai can control his heart beats to the point he can use it for passing secret code. It becomes plot armor so thick that it entirely erases the stakes for our characters. They’re all treated as practically immortal, able to overcome anything thrown at them, I’m not even worried anymore when a character takes a lance through the heart, I know he’s walking it off in the next scene.

K is a lot more balanced with its abilities. None of the characters, outside of the Kings, feel so overpowered that they are impossible to stop and they’re not shown to be capable of things outside of their given abilities or established, and might I say reasonable, skillsets.  Even the Kings have their peers in the other Kings. Sure, Clansmen can dodge bullets, but if they’re hit by one it hurts and, notably in the case of Totsuka, it can kill. No one is getting impaled multiple times then walking it off. Mikoto is run through with a blade once, and as it should be, he dies. Not only does this maintain the stakes for our characters – they are at the end of the day mortal, and they can get hurt, they can be beaten, they can die – it also gives us a more complicated, and darker story with characters that we can relate to on an emotional level.

Read Part 3