#...all the more reason to dive in and contribute

[mawlbone]

not on theme but what if......

pregnant ghost, pregnant nikto? pregnant krueger?????????

(i need them pregante)

WADDLE - GHOST, NIKTO, KREGUER

SNIPPET: A little peek into the domestic lives of these soldiers and their partners learning to adapt with a little one on the way.

[CW: amab reader, afab characters, and afab terminology usage, no reader’s pronouns mentioned, trans pregnancy, anxiety attacks, vomiting, cramps, slight rutting, and implied sex, and physical and mental health issues mention.]

[COMMENT: Thank you for the request! Sorry about writing this so late, I wish to do the shorter asks to clean up my drafts because I am mentally exhausted everyone. Also since I already wrote about pregnant Nikto in “Cracked Cradles”, I advise new readers to read that to get some context for his part. And special thanks to fish for giving me more brainrot for everyone. And there is angst because unfortunately these men are so miserable.]

Before the deep dive, there will be a lot of personal headcanons and thoughts given to each character that I will discuss before divulging into the ask to give more context as to how they will act during pregnancy in the order above. But I will TRY to keep it short and do a whole post about it later to save you the trouble! ٩(๑❛ᴗ❛๑)۶

For all what is considered “Simon” or “Ghost”, I wholeheartedly believe at the end of the day, he’s the kindest character in COD because of his upbringing and how he treats people he feels personally responsible for.

If you look back in the Modern Warfare 2: Ghost “Dead Life”, a lot of details are dropped of his childhood such as his father’s abuse, Tommy’s bullying and drug addiction later in life, and how it was only really having his mother defending him from everyone else. In this type of environment, it’s quite easy, hell even understandable for someone to become resentful and lash out. I won’t blame him if one of his main reasons to joining the Air Force was to escape the house once he was old enough.

But despite having to come home to his mother’s distress after his service to the news of Tommy’s newfound drug addiction and stealing to further fund it… He decides to take a long break and still decide to take care of the boy, now man that once too contributed to his troubles along with his father and get Tommy help and kick his father out of the house and declare he’ll be the one taking responsibility for them now as simply Simon.

He’s rational, he understands that his father is the root of everyone’s troubles such as introducing Tommy to drugs in the first place and constantly distressing his mother with his infidelity. And people may think this show of selflessness is only in 09’ Ghost but even 22’ Ghost, he is quite caring such as constantly joking with Soap with his dry ass humor to lighten up the tension during operations. Even dropping his professionalism when worrying about his sergeant during that specific scene when Soap collapses and didn’t hear a response from him with such a soft tone. All of that as if the nickname, “Johnny” wasn’t enough haha as Ghost too. Simon’s kindness never left him even after all his trauma.

He’s such a sweet boy.

Nikto and Krueger, while there is not a lot of detail for both of them canonically, I cry miserably at this, I do imagine both of them led quite lonely childhoods and joined armed service to find some purpose in their life. If not, possibly having some passive suicidal behaviors that never got really checked for their psych evaluation because the higher ups just need bodies at the end of the day to train, not humans.

Look, Nikto is considered still so useful and effective that the bosses declare him too valuable to waste which is scary to think about, so I won’t be surprised if Kreuger has some issues of his own that he keeps covered underneath that mask of his. I’ll write a whole analysis for them later too like Simon’s because I love them too! But this is already getting too long, so hope you enjoy domestic life with them.

Ghost

Being with Ghost means that you will have to deal with death constantly at the steps of your door with the life he leads. So he will be the type of person who absolutely will refuse to get pregnant unless he’s retired or has some 30 step plan in place to keep himself safe during it. Listen, he’s older and more experienced now, therefore that means he made a lot of new enemies and he already lost his family once, please don’t make him go through it again with you.

Though it doesn’t stop him from contemplating the family life with you still whenever he sees a family on the streets while you’re out on a walk together, it makes not exactly bitter, but somber if more so than anything wondering if he’s depriving you of that type of joy. He really likes his job, it practically defines him but staying at home and having a family again sounds a bit too good for now.

When he does get pregnant eventually after years of reassurance from you and preparation with the help of Price and Laswell to help him conceal his identity even further and moving somewhere quiet, Ghost will desperately try to be at peace throughout the duration of his pregnancy because he doesn’t want the baby to suffer from all his mood swings, and have issues because of all his hormones screwing with him.

Alongside this point, I do think the Rileys has a history of mental troubles and the last thing Ghost will want is to carry it down further to his baby. It’s not exactly that he’ll hate his child or his late family if they do inherit it but he will rather they led a much more happier life than he did without feeling like a burden all because he was greedy to have a family again.

He’ll heavily latch himself onto you whenever a nasty thought keeps cracking against his head. Getting all insecure and dealing with horrible intrusive thoughts wondering if he’ll repeat his father’s cycle of abuse onto his baby, it doesn’t help that he already looks so much like him. He will probably beg the baby to look more like you than him because the thought of seeing a resemblance to younger him makes him ill enough to lose any appetite for the rest of the day.

But months of watching you kissing and talking to the bump all while praising him for practically just existing makes his heart feel lighter about the matter when you stroke over his stretched skin and tell him how gorgeous he is still. His favorite however, that makes his heart unbearably warm is when he wakes up in the morning to see your sleepy head pressed against his tummy cuddling into the baby unconscious every time without fail. He doesn’t tell you about the countless photos he took of that moment with the golden light bathing you in warmth and illuminating that shiny ring on your finger.

During the pregnancy phase, you’ll have to move your shared bed to the corner of the room so he can feel safe while sleeping with the wall and you pressed again him, protecting and keeping the baby and him warm from the outside world. One of the many little things you had prepared for him to sooth his worries and insomnia, and when it gets so bad due to your husband’s anxiety, you’ll resort to taking Ghost into the car and driving endlessly throughout the night on long roads and around neighborhoods until the ride lulls him back to the gentle embrace of sleep fogs over his eyes once more. A large helping of sticky toffee pudding also gets him at ease enough to rest happily with how much he been craving sweets lately to end off dinner.

He becomes much more relaxed as he gets further along his pregnancy after his mind becomes more secure, just ditching the pants and wearing loose shorts and shirts around the house because he had enough dealing with soiled clothes due to his leaky chest and numerous bathroom runs because the child keeps kicking onto his bladder to annoy him for not giving her enough attention or when they just miss you too.

So you’ll have to deal with grumpy Ghost who become more needy and squirming to fit underneath your shirt to feel you skin to skin with him, badgering you to help him with his aches because it’s too uncomfortable and he’s tired! He becomes much more playful and all smiles when you decide to work from home so you can watch over him during the last few weeks until his due date. Long slow days where you get to see him sleep more and become louder, already preparing dad jokes and all that jazz.

But it’ll only be his misfortune one day when he laughed too hard at his own lame joke, leading his water to suddenly burst like a broken dam as you watched in pure dismay, as you lead him out the door with the bags to the base’s hospital with your now sheepish husband.

Nikto

Personally, Nikto in my interpretation has endometriosis and therefore has much more issues with getting pregnant in the first place with the additional pain onto him. So in “Crackled Cradles”, it was basically luck that he was able to get his daughter in the first place with more than enough affection to heal his pain away with the amount of pampering he gotten while pregnant.

With the newest addition in the family now, he’s perfectly content with you being out of his sight while he’s bonding with his baby and doing some housekeeping when you’re stuck in your home office for hours on end, just crying to yourself silently that you cannot be with Nikto despite only being a few rooms away because you have deadlines to meet. But hearing the happy cries and the warm raspy voice of your precious family just outside your door motivates you enough to continue on, even if you have to endure the droning old instructions that your superiors have to repeat continuously.

Days where he peeks into your office to drop off lunch and for some kisses or hearing your daughter crashing in on her walker babbling for some attention from you too, only for her to be dragged back outside as her protests fade away by Nikto’s hand dragging her car back outside.

Even with the abundance of affection, that doesn’t stop him from constantly pawing at your pants though as he whines and demands for another baby from you. You’ll find him begging, all teary eyed for one during his birthdays, anniversaries and even during the holidays because he wants more little you’s running around the cottage. It makes you sigh at his baby fever, especially when it gets the worst during his periods as he drag his bottom against your thigh to relieve his aches, trying to tempt you into knocking him up again, praying for hopefully more than one this time. He became so greedy and it’s your fault that he became like this after keeping him all sweet and warm, so take responsibility why don’t you?

If you wish to be mean to him, you can put on a condom on last minute to ease his aches and watch him sob when he feels rubber instead of you as he curses you for being to horrible to him. Thrashing and scratching up your back because while you’re relieving all of his bad aches, he truly wants another baby so he doesn’t get lonely too once you two grow old, he doesn’t like the idea of an empty nest in the next few decades.

So you shouldn’t be surprised the next night after tucking your daughter to sleep when you have to face your dear husband sitting atop of your bed, glaring at you to kill you twice before you turn your head to see his knife embedded into the empty box of condoms besides him. “Do it properly this time”, you’ll hear him growl as you feel cold sweat begin to drip down your back. It’s not exactly that you wanted to be mean to him, it’s that you will rather save him from the heartache since he’s already at a high risk during pregnancy. But you feel that’s too late to say as you watch Nikto begin to stalk towards you.

It’ll only be a few months later when you are met with a positive pregnancy test in your hand with Nikto with a smile so smug, he practically looks like the cat that ate the canary. You should had already learned to never mess with a dedicated soldier, especially if you are married to one. You don’t exactly have the heart to scold him gently that day for risking his health once again when he’s beaming so brightly at his bump once again.

You decide to hold it in and now just enjoy watching your daughter sleep in between her father’s legs for nap time, trying her best to lay her head as light as possible on her sibling when you came out of your office to check up on them, worried about the long silence for too long before joining their cuddle pile. You’ll take any chance for them to rest, as you gathered more cushions surround them as you continuously had to guide Nikto to go nap as well after spending too much time making matching clothes for the baby already.

Though his skin is already marred with heavy scars from the torture he had experienced, it’s not exactly he’s insecure of them much anymore with the new stretch marks littering about his arms and thighs after his first pregnancy when you made no shame in showing your appreciating by smoothing over the leftover flap of his stomach and helping him bathe and taking over his scarred skin. It makes him feel satisfied with this new life, even if he’s reduced to be more “harmless” now.

He doesn’t get what you mean when you say he looks “beautiful” when he feels all sweaty and disgusting from the labors of pain, but all that matters is the opinions of his children and you in his life, so he’s quite content even if it gets a bit busy and you have to work overtime sometimes to free your weekends to spend time with them, but life is good. He’ll have to get a bigger bed soon to fit everyone later and perhaps do some renovations on the cottage later.

Kreuger

For all what is known and isn’t known about the ever changing operator, under cold lights and the sturdiness of his form, he’s ever so reflective in the way those tiny green toy soldiers. You’ll watch dark beady eyes gaze upon you when he comes crashing into your clinic. And there you’ll become fascinated with the way his back muscles fold under your hands like cheap plastic. There’s no label for this, that’s just how it works between you, him, and the silence that envelopes you all into nothingness in the long quiet. So as long as no one knows what happens behind the closed doors of your office, this standstill will continue between you and him. Even when the heat becomes unbearably nauseating when teeth meet flesh.

It’s a familiar tango, there’s no rush for you to evade the cloak he surrounds himself with. Always rummaging through your file cabinets to help himself to your snacks, you had since learned to order more of his favorites for him. Greedy bastard… He’s cute enough to get away with it when he sleeps so soundly atop of you, with his head buried within your neck or in one of the clinic’s bed while you work. But you had been getting a bit worried with how he’ll been more sleepier nowadays. You’ll get an answer a few days later when you hear the familiar sounds of boots hitting tiles, only to be jolted at your disgruntled partner staring at you before sliding the positive test onto your desk.

There’s very little things that Kreuger can keep himself attached to. Constantly switching jobs and names entirely, except for skin and bones. It’s a shame that he keeps resting from his loneliness, he rather not open himself up for a knife to be rammed inside his chest. So forgive him if he’s a bit awkward, foolish at worst with how he tries to talk without sounding like an automated machine. He rather not leave himself all exposed but years of exposure under your hands left him trusting enough to tell you. If he wasn’t, he would’ve ran away long ago.

Arrangements had to be made immediately for him as he heavily insisted on keeping his career and the baby, but it’s fine, you had already understood this long ago when he first begin crashing into your life. Kreuger had always been adamant on having the freedom to move around, so if anything, it’s quite nice to see him more standstill if anything, all curled up and hogging the sheets. You’ll deal with the earful from your superiors later for taking him off the field for a bit.

And with how elusive Krueger is, it shouldn’t be a surprise that his pregnancy is too a mystery as you held his practically nonexistent bump. Feeling over the alabaster skin, you’ll move your hands to his newly formed love handles instead and squish the side of your hips as he complains about how much your child had been squeezing itself into the back of his stomach and them giving him back pains. You’ll laugh though when you gently poke the child to feel them and watch as they push against your hand all annoyed for bothering them. Before Kreuger deciding to grab your own to hold instead.

He’ll heavily complain about how clumsy he feels nowadays, unlike his agileness before, he more or less been could be taken as a penguin on olive oil with how much he has to hold himself onto you now. It makes him unbearably angry sometimes with how bad his legs cramp up and you’re not there to hold him. He doesn’t like anyone else touching him and he already shuns away from most of the base anyways, thankfully his silence is enough to scare most people off anyways. So you’ll try your best to massage his aches away and help him tidy up his scruff when he becomes too tired to do anything.

Eventually when he reaches his third trimester, you relocated him back to your home with him to be more comfortably situated. No longer is he confined to the cafeteria’s slop or your cabinet to fulfill his strange addictions. Here in your kitchen, he can thrive on making his fancy little sandwiches with all types of breads, cheeses, and jams filling up your cabinets now. And other small finger foods like hard pretzels to eat throughout the day. He would rather not deal with the nausea from a full stomach nowadays. But the child seems to be delighted by the taste of apple juice nowadays as Kreuger bemoans about how they are the most active whenever he’s drunk some to satisfy his cravings and kicking him excitedly before resorting back to his spine out of all places.

Desperately needs some quiet or ambient music playing whenever he goes because he doesn’t look the fogginess of his brain screwing with him and despises vomiting, so often you’ll have some gum of smelling salts for him to cool down. It leaves him a little too raw for him to deal on a regular basis. You regularly go on your knees to massage his swollen feet and put socks on for him when he cannot anymore.

While Kreuger huffs and puffs all he wants about the pain, you’ll hear him speak little endearments to the child and catch him sleeping outside with a blanket over his stomach in a porch’s chair, letting the cool evening breeze rock him to sleep. You decide to make yourself cozy and settle beside him in another chair, watching how soften his face had become without the harsh lines of anger and that net casting his face into obscurity. His face become more rounded now, sharp lines turned puffy from sleep and more weight holding onto him. He’s more human than he ever been, no longer that statuesque toy soldier you once knew before. The moment would had been endearing if it wasn’t for Kreuger’s noisy snoring scaring away the birds.

Even with a few rough patches here and there, you’ll watch Kreuger pace around the house carefully as he holds his bump and asking you to rearrange the nursery around to fit his preference. With full drawers and the sight of your sleepy husband partaking in this joy of picking out what he wishes is peaceful. You’ll have to hire someone to help you both for the birth later with how Kreuger’s lack of identity will cause trouble for the baby later, but in the present moment, you’ll simply partake in watching your man trying to choose between the two different floral sheets to align the crib with.

[solarpunkani]

Things To Do To Maintain Hope In These Trying Times

Okay so look. This isn't the desireable outcome for me and my fellow solarpunks, but I personally find that I have two options right now--panic and wait for the worst; or dream of, hope for, and work towards the best that I can manage. And I prefer that second option. Is a single individual going to be able to remold the societal systems we find ourselves in, reshape the fabric of our government and turn everything for the better in the next four years? If someone can, it's not me.

But what I can do is do stuff to make things better, lighter, and more hopeful for myself and my community around me, through actions big and small. So here's what I plan to do, or hope to take on, to keep myself from absolutely doomspiraling. And if this list helps you, inspires you to take up an action I'm doing or to try something completely different, by all means that's amazing! What's more solarpunk than inspiring others to be more solarpunk?

Anyways

1: Trash Cleanups and Other Volunteering

I joined a mutual aid group a few months back and lately we've been doing a lot of trash clean ups, which I find really fun! It also helps feel like I'm making a tangible, helpful difference in my community--the areas look nicer for humans, there's less litter issues for plants and animals--it's just a general improvement! I have recently found nothing gets me fired up quite like a trash cleanup these days. I would also like to join more volunteering/mutual aid groups in the area, I'd just have to find ones that fit my current work schedule (and aren't a huge commute to and fro). Maybe someday this year I'll get the courage (and time) to join the Food Not Bombs in my city for a few events!

Maybe picking up trash at parks and ditches and intersections isn't going to improve the entire nation's situation, I'll never claim that it would. But improving the world around you, even a little bit, can help get the ball rolling for other changes--maybe people will start using a park more once its cleaned up, maybe native plants will reclaim that ditch and create a new habitat, maybe people will see us cleaning and see our flag and check out other stuff our organization does! Bit by bit, we're contributing to a brighter, cleaner future.

Maybe I'll get the courage to clean up some trash on my own, who knows.

2: Make Stuff With My Hands

This covers a lot of things, and not always a physical thing to hold. Maybe it's crocheting little plushies, or hats and cardigans, or anything I feel like to accomplish something. Maybe I'll learn to sew more things, or how to embroider. Maybe I'll draw, or write more short stories, or work on my longer projects.

Sure, some things can be made to give away or donate, or can be made with a specifically solarpunky end goal and message. But honestly, even if I'm not writing solarpunk short stories or drawing solarpunky art, if I'm writing or drawing anything it helps bring me hope--and brightens the day of my friends who enjoy it too!

3: Gardening and Sharing

It's winter as I'm writing this, which means its about time to dive headfirst into garden planning and seed starting! Even the process of watching something grow from a tiny little seed to a fully-grown plant brings me hope, and every different kind of plant gives hope for a different reason! My pollinator garden helps me take action to assist the native pollinator species by giving them a place to feed and grow, and the more kinds of native plants I provide the more habitat I create for them! And the fruits and vegetables I grow bring a sense of accomplishment with each harvest, and satisfaction as I share them with family, friends, and neighbors! I am still chasing the high of sharing bowls and bowls of tomatoes and peppers with my cul-de-sac.

In addition to my own personal garden, my volunteering group is looking into adopting an abandoned community garden and bringing it back to life! If we can (still waiting for approval), it'll bring access to fresh veggies and herbs to the nearby community, and if it goes well we may even try to take up more around town! I'm really, really excited about this project!!

Maybe sharing produce from my garden will inspire my neighbors to create their own (I'm already lowkey claiming credit for inspiring one neighbor to start growing tomatoes last year), and share their extra produce, and inspire more people to garden! Maybe talking about my pollinator garden and sharing seeds with my friends and coworkers will create more interest, and more habitat for for local creatures! Maybe if I yap about milkweed and tree snags hard enough, people will see the expanses of grass on the sides of the road differently, or find a different species to advocate for!

Then of course there's the possibility of guerrilla gardening. While there are a lot of reasons I haven't taken it up super hard yet (not finding good sites, not having a lot of money for throwaway seeds, not wanting to be a black woman in the south doing 'weird stuff' on the side of the road, etc), maybe I will. In any case, I have brought up the idea of scattering wildflower seeds at some of the sites we clean up to my volunteering group--if that idea gets taken up, that could in a sense be guerrilla gardening, right?

4: Clean My Goddamn Room

"Ani what does cleaning your room have to do with hope in these trying times" Clean room, clean mind, more room to start seeds, less environmental stress. Maybe just doing a few chores when I'm feeling anxious can help me take time to think things through instead of downspiraling, or can help me work my way through a plot hole in a story, or think of a new project to take up.

Maybe for you guys its not 'cleaning your room,' maybe its some other task. Sometimes doing a small, mundane task for yourself can give you the vibes and energy to take up another challenge!

5: Encouraging Others

I've said it before and I'll say it again, is there anything more solarpunk than encouraging other people to be more solarpunk?

Even if you aren't waxing poetic about the values and virtue of the solarpunk movement, being a source of hope and light for others can do a surprising amount to get things done! For example, if I personally can't muster the courage to go to an FNB event or a rally, or if something comes up and I suddenly find myself unable to garden this year or keep doing trash cleanups, if I--through talking about my hobbies or sharing resources on how to start or just existing and vibing with my gay little NPC bounce and chatting about sunflowers in a checkout line--inspire five other people to take up an action, that's five more people taking up an action. And that action can lead to them doing more and more, bigger and better things. If I help a friend feel better when they're feeling down, maybe they'll have the energy to help others, who'll then help others, and help make the world just that much brighter! Even if the action is unrelated to what I personally am doing, it'd still be a beautiful and amazing thing! If me sharing my crochet projects inspires someone else to take up leatherworking or sculpting or woodworking, that's still more creative energy in the world! If me talking about native wildflowers burgeons an interest in native trees, or grasses, or hell even something like green building design or community planning somehow, that's someone developing an entirely different skillset than I could ever imagine, which can be used to do amazing things!

I'm not gonna pretend like its going to be all sunshine and rainbows from here on out! We're still talking about the person who literally refused to leave the house yesterday because she was so anxious something might happen, after all. But if I'm given a choice between wallowing in misery and anxiety and despair, or doing anything I can--even the smallest things--to make things a little bit better and brighter for those around me? I know what my choice is.

[cobalt-drawlight]

I've fallen into the Persians ship train and I'd rather not get out of it, so have some lil doodles of mostly Nasiens

[es-draws]

If You Gain Faster, Does It Go to Your Belly?

Strap in folks, we’re going to take a deep dive into the Science of Weight Gain™. And for those impatient readers, the answer is…

Yes! Gaining weight quickly does seem to lead to more belly gains

As a precursor, I am not a doctor or medical researcher. I thought this study was interesting, and wanted to talk about it! But please don't take this as advice. Please don't go and gain based on the information presented here.

Let's start with some definitions. What types of fat are there? There are generally two categories - subcutaneous and visceral. Subcutaneous is the fat we all know and love; the soft fat that forms just under your skin, and is most commonly associated with the appearance of being "fat". This fat can form anywhere on the body, and is generally considered to be the healthier kind of fat. Then there is visceral fat, which is fat that accumulates deep in the abdomen behind the muscle layer. This kind of fat leads to a "ball belly" or "apple" shape, where the midsection is rounded but also firm, since fat is under muscle. Visceral fat surrounds organs, and for that reason is generally considered to have higher health risks.

Next, when you gain weight, what normally contributes to where the weight will go? There's a lot of research that shows this is mostly determined by genetics. What foods you eat, what exercises you do, and other environmental factors contribute little to where the weight goes[1]. In general, people tend to gain more subcutaneous fat than visceral fat[2].

So now to the question at hand - anecdotally among gainers, it's said that if you gain weight quickly, it will go to the belly. Is this true?

Turns out, a study has already been done on this very subject.

Let's talk about the Science™

23 subjects (15 men, 8 women) - all of whom were relatively thin (23.6 BMI) - were placed on an "overfeeding interval" of 8 weeks, where they were given 400–1200 extra calories over their normal intake. This was done in the form of ice cream shakes, snickers bars, or boost meal supplements[3]. In particular, this overfeeding period is similar to a lot of the rapid weight gain methods used in the feedism community.

Participants were weighed daily, and body fat was measured at the beginning and end of the study. Body fat was broken down into 3 categories; visceral fat, upper-body subcutaneous fat (fat around the midsection), and lower-body subcutaneous fat (fat around the butt and thighs).

Here are the results: on average, subjects on average weighed 158 lbs to start, and gained around 8 lbs over two months. On average, they gained 1 lb of visceral fat, 2 lbs of lower body fat, and 4.5 lbs of upper body fat.

What does this mean? It means that during rapid weight gain, over half of the fat gained goes to the belly. But importantly, it goes to subcutaneous fat - the fat directly under the skin that we associate with soft, jiggly bellies. Very little went to the visceral fat associated with firm, round bellies.

Anecdotally, this seems to correlate with what’s commonly seen with rapid weight gain in the feedism community. Most gainers, especially thinner gainers, tend to notice rounder bellies when they first put on weight. But this weight also tends to be soft - often times, gainers can still squeeze and squish their midsection, which seems to prove fat has built up just under the skin. Later, once they've gained more or the weight has settled, the fat may distribute more evenly over the body. Again, this is just anecdotal. But the data seems to support what we see!

There are still some things this study does not answer. There's no data published on biological differences, for example. There are almost double the amount of men compared to women in the study, and AMAB folks are known to gain more upper body weight compared to AFAB folks. We do not know if these participants are gaining in different ways. Also, while subjects were on average at a healthy BMI when the study began, we know that BMI is a flawed metric. It does not mean they were all thin. Some may have been overweight, or may have gained weight or lost weight previously. These factors might also contribute where weight is likely to settle, and we cannot infer from the published data alone.

And though this study shows that gaining weight quickly will lead to belly gains, it doesn’t answer why. For this I have a theory, but that will have to wait for the next installment of the Science of Weight Gain™.

So there you have it! If belly gains are what you’re searching for, gain and gain quickly! But be careful… once you start, it may be hard to stop. And soon you may find that your newly-formed belly is just the start.

[1]There's research showing sugar-dense and high-fat foods leads to more visceral fat gains, but proportionally this is very small compared to genetic or sex factors.

[2]AMAB folks, in particular, are more likely to gain visceral fat.

[3]This study sounds like a feeder's dream and it gets my blood up just reading it. How do I become an official Science Feeder™?

[wantingsobad]

an 'accident' | h.hj x reader (s, f)

masterlist | series masterlist

pairing : skz!hyunjin x reader (y/n)

content : 18+, morning sex, somnophilia, oral sex (fem receiving), finished in pants, most amazing bf ever hyunjin

wc : 900

The summer breeze flows through the screened window alongside the cascading light that shines over your and Hyunjin’s bodies. 

Hyunjin is restless. His arms lay over his eyes, battling his urges to wake you up in his moment of desperation. 

He should not be so turned on, but waking up to the sight of your barely clothed body lying in front of him got him too worked up to admit it to your face. This, along with the morning wood he woke up sporting, was the ultimate kill shot for his dignity at 8 in the morning. 

He really should not wake you up. You both had a rough night, returning

 from a hard day of work and practice to the point where you barely exchanged more than a few words with him before falling asleep. He had been worked up all day yesterday, and he hadn’t been disappointed or angry when you came home like a walking zombie, but he was pent up.

He wanted nothing more than to wake you up with his head in between your thighs, breathing life into him for the day by reaching you to your climax. 

He figured there was no harm in satisfying those dreams, as sleep sex had been something you commented on once or twice, saying it was “a dream” to wake up to him pleasuring you.

He figured it was about time that this happened, leading to him lowering himself down the bed and pulling back the covers to expose your soft skin. 

A gentle tug on your waistband brought a strong exhale to leave you, making Hyunjin flick his glance to ensure he did not wake you. You only shuffle around a little, spreading your legs more in a subconscious move from feeling him touch you. 

This excitement that runs through him is electrifying, bringing his every nerve to life and contributing to the pulsating of his groin. He didn’t know this would ever affect him like it was. He only scoffed a little laugh when you mentioned it before, not genuinely considering it until now. 

You settle, calmly returning to even breaths. This does not stay for long, though, as Hyunjin pulls your panties to the side, breathing onto your cunt before diving in for what he would consider to be his ‘breakfast.’

You whimper and thrash in your sleep, closing your legs around his had as he works to pleasure you. Hyunjin closes his eyes and works on you with full determination, rolling his hips into the duvet of your bed.

The pressure makes him groan into your cunt, halting his actions for a moment before returning back to his meal.

A hand is then entangled in Hyunjin’s blond hair, bringing him out of his pleasure-filled haze to look up at a newly-awake you.

He breaks away from your cunt to say, “Good morning, beautiful,” leaving a kiss on your throbbing clit and smirking, “you sleep okay? Any good dreams?”

You huff at his antics, pushing his head back toward your heat with a mumbled, “Stop talking, Jinnie…”

He airliy chuckles at your impatience, clearly not wanting to deal with his taunts this early in the morning. He appeals and lowers his head back to lap at your cunt.

You grasp your hand tighter in his hair as he hits your sensitive spots with his tongue. This drags a muffled groan out of him, feeling both pleasure from the tugs on his hair and the rutting of his hips that came in response.

Your eyes roll back as your high approaches closer, thrashing under the hold he has on your hips, pinning you down to the bed.

Hyunjin loves going down on you just for this reason, to see your pretty face twist up in pleasure that he is giving you, his angel. People like to say Hyunjin is a humble man, but when it comes to pleasuring you he takes full pride in his abilities.

“Jinnie- gon’ cum. Don’t stop…please-“ Your last sentence comes out as a breathy whine, making Hyunjin takes a deep breath to try and concentrate on what he’s doing before he finishes in his boxers at your heavenly pleads.

He focuses on you, honing in on your pleasure points that get you even closer to the edge.

Your grip tightens again and a cry leaves your lips as a wave of orgasmic pleasure washes over you, thrashing your hips further into his mouth even with the oversensitivity getting to you.

Your breathing subsides eventually, feeling calmed after Hyunjin brought you back down with kisses and bites across your body until his face met yours, giving you a long comforting kiss to ground you.

“Baby, let me help you now..” you drearily mumble out to him, ready to fully reciprocate the orgasm he just gave you.

“Don’t worry about that, honey,” he chuckles at you, motioning down with his head to the painfully obvious wet spot on his boxers that covers his groin. “I really tried to hold myself back, baby… but you looked too good, and I was too worked up.”

You giggle and cover your face with your hands, feeling something akin to pride at what you did to your angelic boy.

“Okay, then I promise to make it up to you later”

To this he lowers his head into your neck and mumbles back, “I can get on board with that..”

a/n : morning hyune is actually my brain rot. like it’s not a want anymore it’s a need. anyway i am very content with how this turned out and yall are NOT ready for what i have prepared for jisung. as he is my bias, i promise i will not disappoint and i will stay strong to my sub!han agenda. anyway ily all and stay safe!! - eb

taglist : @teenagemoonharmony @lovesunshinefelix @applepenelope @kookiesbunny @dahliadaenerys @dawooosh @hynmgj1nnn @binniesbang @diorrxluvskz @queen-in-the-shadows @hotseesaw @linosgoodslut

[hellfire-state-of-mind]

don't you worry your pretty little mind

pairing: Dave York x fem!reader

rating: PG for 1 (one) ass squeeze but otherwise just all the fluff

word count: ⁓ 1.3k give or take

warnings: none, i think?? teeny tiny smidge of angst at the very beginning, Dave being an adorable dad, one singular ass squeeze as mentioned above, reader has no physical description besides being called "wife"

a/n: my contribution to @happypedrohours's Charcuterie Board Challenge!! thank you Mel and Sara for putting all of this together 🥰 my pairing was Dave + feta cheese. the event doesn't technically start until Friday but i have another wip scheduled for that day 👀 and i was just too excited to wait to share this. happy belated father's day to our favorite murder daddy 💛

“Honey, have you seen the feta?”

Dave wanders into the kitchen to see your entire top half buried in the open fridge. He laughs at the sight and you whip around with wide eyes.

“Well?”

“It should be right there on the shelf in front of you.” Dave leans on the counter beside you, chuckling again as you dive back in.

“You’re right, it should be. But it’s not.” You slam the door closed and begin pacing around the kitchen, opening various cabinets in a frantic search.

“Sweetheart, it’s not going to be under the sink with the sponges.” Dave tries to reason with you but you’re set on your task. He finally sighs and gently takes your wrist, halting your movement. “Hey, relax. It’s just a stupid plat-”

“David York, I swear to God if you say ‘stupid platter’ one more time, I will hit you over the head with the cutting board,” you threaten only half-seriously. “This is the one thing your mother requested for this party and it’s ruined.”

Dave fights the urge to roll his eyes as you’re already on edge and he knows it would only piss you off even more. “It is not ruined because there’s one thing missing. Look,” he wraps his arm around you and directs you to the center island where your meticulously designed charcuterie board lays out, “there is plenty of food here already. Grapes, olives, bell peppers, pitas and hummus. Carrots and ranch for the girls.” He turns to you and lifts your chin to meet your eyes. “My mother is not going to miss one thing out of all of this.”

You huff despite your appreciation of his attempt to reassure you. “Yes, she will. Because she hates me.” You cross your arms, deflating as Dave scoffs and backs away, rubbing his forehead.

“We’ve been over this. She does not-”

“Yes, she does, Dave! She literally told me herself that I’m the reason you and Carol split!”

“And we both know that couldn’t be further from the truth!”

“Yes! I know that. You know that. But she is convinced that I’m a homewrecker and she’s on a mission to destroy me by nitpicking every single thing that I do.” You match Dave’s stance, rubbing your own forehead to stave off a headache. “I just…she’s your mother, Dave, and I…”

Dave sighs and closes the distance between you again, rubbing your arms soothingly. “I know, baby, I know. I appreciate you wanting to impress her but in the end, it won’t make any difference.” Your head shoots up, brows furrowed in confusion. “I love you. You’re my wife. And nothing my mother says or does is going to change the way I feel.”

You relax at his clarification. Scrunching your eyes closed, you groan in defeat and lean your head on his chest, wrapping your arms around his waist. You hold each other for a moment, Dave rubbing your back. Finally, Dave lets out a deep relenting breath.

“But if it really means that much to you, I’ll run to the store and get more.”

You squeeze him tight and peck his lips, a cheesy smile breaking across your face. “Thank you.”

When Dave returns 3 hours later, the kitchen is even more a mess than it was before. It looks like the fridge vomited all of its contents across the counters and dining table. Your charcuterie board, however, still sits untouched in the middle of the island. You’re nowhere in sight.

Dave sets the plastic grocery bag containing your cheesy trophy next to the culinary creation and opens his mouth to call your name, but the doorbell cuts him off. He goes to the door, welcoming in his daughters and ex-wife. Carol bears a tray of brownies and follows Dave to the kitchen while Molly and Alice race upstairs.

Carols lets out a low whistle at the tsunami of food items. “Doing some spring cleaning, Dave?” she jokes.

Dave just shakes his head in exasperation as you enter in from the garage. “I thought I heard the door!” You cross over to give Carol a quick, friendly hug and take the dessert tray from her.

“Baby, what…is all this?” Dave turns in a circle, motioning to the room around him.

You crouch down and rifle through a cabinet for a plate to set out the brownies. “I turned the entire fridge inside-out looking for the feta. No luck.” Standing, you see the grocery bag on the island and gasp delightedly. “You got it! What took you so long, anyway?”

Dave groans and drops his head back tiredly. “You would not believe the trials I endured to find that for you.”

You and Carol laugh at his dramatics. She pats his shoulder and ventures over to the stairs in search of the girls. You round the island and place your hands on his chest. “My hero.”

He looks down at you, smiling at the appreciation in your eyes and pulling you into his arms. “You’re lucky I love you.”

“Yeah, I am.” You lean up to kiss him and he happily accepts, cupping your cheek with one hand to deepen it. You pull away slightly to mutter against his lips. “I’ll have to figure out a way to thank you later.”

A rumble emits from deep in Dave’s chest as his other hand slides down to cup your ass, earning a soft squeak from you as he squeezes. “I might have a couple ideas.”

You pull apart from each other as a shout from upstairs warns the impending arrival of Molly and Alice. You unpack the cheese and begin slicing it as the thunder of small feet spills down the stairs and into the kitchen. Dave steps forward and catches Alice in his arms as she runs in, followed closely by her sister, lifting her with an exaggerated groan as she squeals in excitement. “You’re getting too big for me, baby girl.”

You laugh and smile fondly at Dave interacting with his daughters. Carol enters and quietly offers to help you arrange the platter, careful not to interrupt the heartwarming scene in front of you. You start handing her pieces of cheese as Molly walks over and plops her chin on the countertop with a disappointed huff. “Awww, you found it.”

You scrunch your eyebrows and look up at her. “What do you mean, sweetheart?”

“I hid the cheese, but you found it anyway.”

This catches Dave’s attention as he looks over, putting his hands on his hips in a typical dad stance. “Where did you hide it, Mol?”

The young girl crosses to the fridge but opens the door to the freezer instead. She digs to the back of the bottom drawer and emerges with a rock-solid brick of feta cheese. “Right here.”

Carol’s jaw falls open in surprise. You press your lips together, stifling a laugh. Dave stutters out, “W-why…why would you put it there?”

Molly shrugs, unconcerned. “Because it’s gross and I didn’t want it.”

You burst into a fit of giggles at the innocent statement and Alice joins in. Carol simply sighs and drops her head in exasperation before devolving into soft laughter as well. Dave, meanwhile, still stands with his hands on his hips, blinking repeatedly as he tries to comprehend his daughter’s words.

He finally looks over at you incredulously and you try to smother your amusement for his sake, but the look on his face is too priceless and only makes you laugh even harder.

“Happy Father’s Day?”

[snaccpopstudios]

Hi everyone! We're here with the long awaited post on our newest bachelor, Simoun. We know you've all been abuzz with questions about him so we hope to answer some of that in this deep dive into his creation. This post is in lieu of our usual Wednesday devlogs as we've been writing this over the span of several weeks, and was co-authored, edited, and reviewed by Tobias, Jude, ToyboxToonz, Primarvelous, and Sauce. The above image was drawn by @toyboxtoonz.

You can read the full post for free on Patreon, or click the readmore to see it all!

Personally speaking, some of my concerns since Simoun's debut are thoughts like "Do people think I'm making SnaccPop Studios push an agenda?" and "Do people think I'm going through a checklist while making new characters?" It's made it difficult for us to write this quickly because this is quite personal to myself and the rest of the sensitivity consultation team on the DachaBo team.

Concept to Creation

The story of DachaBo begins way before SnaccPop Studios itself was even a concept (that's Sauce's story to tell though). Early Patreon art of Simoun exists from November 2022, back before I was signed on to manage the Patreon and any other projects besides Sunny Day Jack. Sauce had some ideas laying around for several other characters in the DachaBo universe that didn't make it into the proof-of-concept demo:

I dug up an old draft for the DachaBo cat character we teased and it featured a story concept where the cat character was originally a female DachaBo character, referencing the original female design. And overtime he got tired of how he was being treated and decided to change his own self to reflect who he wanted to be, not the sycophants who collected the toys and whatnot ... It was shelved because I didnt have the means to sensitivity check it The designs are half cooked is all but he was supposed to be Indian ethnicity coded for no other reason than I've never seen a character like that

One thing that's important to note is that there definitely are Indian folks who are gender diverse (see Hijra on Wikipedia for a quick primer on one of the traditionally recognized nonbinary genders in South Asia) so it's not a novel concept by any means, but it's also not very common in media whatsoever.

Why The Long Wait?

One of the other contributing reasons as to why Sauce wasn't able to do much with the concept at the time is because we didn't have a VA for him confirmed yet, as I explained in May:

One thing that's rather unique to SnaccPop Studios in all of my experience as a game developer is the fact that all of our series involve coordinating with Voice Actors from the start, which means we need to take the VAs themselves into account when making characters. Adding another layer of complexity in hiring is the fact that SnaccPop Studios is a strictly Erotic Adult brand focusing on masculine love interests, and even if we focus more on the softcore, there's still the unfortunate stigma that any 18+ work has when attached to your name. All of these contributing factors make the potential talent pool that much smaller. This isn't to make excuses: I know SnaccPop Studios can do better on this front. While we can't make changes to some of the existing series' main cast (we don't want to put people out of a role they've been promised), we will do better moving forward to incorporate more diverse characters into our future titles, and that's a pledge

In the field of voice acting, it's best practice to cast actors with similar backgrounds to the character they're voicing, particularly for characters from marginalized populations (ethnicity, culture, gender, etc.), because it's a recurring issue in all professions where marginalized folks are regularly turned down for employment or career opportunities. You don't have to look far for instances where other voice directors failed to cast the proper talent for a character, even in the AAA sphere where they ought to have the resources to be able to find the proper talent; at SnaccPop, we wanted to avoid that situation at all costs.

Finding Simoun's Voice

So we had to confirm a VA first before we could do anything. Sauce, Reece, and I all tried to put private ads out for a trans masc POC (any ethnicity with dark skin) actor for a R18 game, which was largely met with silence at first, then responded to by folks who didn't fit the role in a full capacity (many only hit one or two of the criteria we laid out, some of them none at all). And it's not hard to imagine why: it's common knowledge that the majority of erotic works often fetishize marginalized people who are otherwise underrepresented in mainstream media. Things such as skin color, body type, hair color, age, etc. are treated as traits to be objectified, and on the off chance that queer folks or people of color might see themselves in porn… it's usually not for the most flattering or empowering of reasons. How could we, an exclusively Adults-only studio, convince someone who isn't familiar with us that we wanted to make something for people like them rather than something that turns them into mere masturbating material?

We were almost about to give up on the Catboy until I decided to take a chance on contacting a VA whom I hadn't had any formal and proper interactions with before. I'd been a fan of his work and knew him from an audition he sent in from a previous game I had worked on, but he knew me solely by name at best since we were following each other on Twitter. Still, it was a lead, and after chewing my nails for half a day, I shot off a message to Soren Viloria.

And what do you know? He said he'd give it a shot as his first NSFW role.

Naming the Lad

Soren is a Filipino VA, and despite the fact that I myself seem to be mistaken as Filipino by other Asians quite regularly, I'm actually not as well-versed in that culture as I ought to be.

There's actually a reason why we were so secretive with Simoun's name for a while: he didn't have one yet, so internally we just kept calling him "the Catboy." We wanted to pick a culture-appropriate name for him, something that was meaningful: Soren initially suggested "Siopao" as it was a common cat name (it's a type of Filipino Steamed Bun, so think of how many pets you've seen who have names like Cupcake or Nacho Supreme), but that didn't seem serious enough for a tsundere catboy like him. A few days later, Soren did a little research on a few well-known characters from Philippine media/culture that fit the bill a bit better:

Elías from the Philippine Revolution novel Noli Me Tángere (a required reading in the Philippines). Cat may like his radical tendencies for revolution and his deep, devoted connections.

Simoun from Noli's sequel, El filibusterismo. Holds revolutionary values similar to Elías, but far less noble and more of a loner. Violent at times, and will do what it takes to get his way.

Panday/Flavio, a very popular hero. Part of his charm is that he doesn't have special powers, but took matters into his own hands and forged a magical blade. Has been portrayed in both 'cool' and comedic ways.

Ricardo "Cardo" from the Philippines' longest-running TV drama Ang Probinsyano. Just a cool action hero dude who cares about family, but is also very ambitious and angy.

Seeing as how we already had an Elias Gallagher, Simoun seemed to be the perfect fit, and the name stuck pretty easily.

Simoun's Boundaries

Now that Simoun had a name, we were able to talk about him more seriously beyond the simple "tsundere cat" tropes. You've all already met Gil Finnegan, who we originally brought into SnaccPop Studios to handle the narrative design for DachaBo but was then onboarded to help with Sunny Day Jack, and those of you in the Patreon Discord server are familiar with our mods Tobias and Jude; along with me and Soren Viloria, that brought the grand total of openly trans masculine members on the team.

We all talked about our personal experiences as trans masc/AFAB people, what things we rarely saw reflected in both mainstream and indie media, things we wanted to see more of. Something we all agreed that was difficult to find was trans masculine folks in sexually dominant roles in erotic media, whether that was live video, audio, writing, art, or a combination thereof; there was only a handful of series we could count on our fingers as far as sexually explicit content that featured trans masculine people in roles that weren't exclusively submissive/bottoms, and the majority of us had already seen those or at least heard of them before (ie. Gummy and the Doctor and Sasha From The Gym were prominent ones). Either discovering this content was difficult due to Search Engine Optimization favoring depictions of trans feminine folks, or it simply didn't exist.

All of this, along with the backstory that Sauce had for Simoun, led us to determine that Simoun would be adverse to submissive roles in intimate situations. Simoun isn't the type to want to be penetrated either due to previous trauma surrounding his gender. Bear in mind that this isn't meant to imply or suggest that there is only one "acceptable" sexual preference for trans masculine folks, nor is Simoun meant to represent all of trans masculinity; he may be our first trans masculine character but certainly isn't the last, as we hope to feature more types of characters at SnaccPop Studios.

As an aside, it should be noted that the trend of erotic trans feminine content being more readily available doesn't necessarily mean that trans women have more positive representation per se; for every kinky piece of art created by trans feminine folks out there, there could be ten more works that fetishize and objectify their bodies. We probably don't need to tell you about the common derogatory slurs that have been used to refer to them; trans feminine and trans masculine people deal with varying levels and types of transphobia as well as situations that oversexualize (or even undersexualize) them, and it's important to focus on content that doesn't strip them of their autonomy.

There actually was a period of time between the release of his concept art after Soren was onboarded where the team observed comments both on Patreon and in the Discord regarding Simoun, and we discussed how we could avoid having people try to ship Bo and Simoun together; because Simoun hasn't had bottom surgery of any kind, we wanted to ensure that tokophobia (fear of pregnancy) or dysphoria wouldn't become a thing for any of us involved in the team or for our trans masculine Patrons. It was a bit of a chicken or the egg situation, trying to keep up with the evolving comments about Simoun to try and anticipate what people might accidentally say.

Debut Day Thoughts, & Moving Forward

We were quite happy with the general reception everyone had with Simoun, and we're excited to see so many people taking a liking to Simoun after his reveal. SnaccPop Studios has always strived to provide inclusive and diverse stories for those who don't often get represented in media, much less NSFW media, and the team was quite elated to see folks who were just as happy to see Simoun.

We hope that the love and care we put into building Simoun has shone through in this post and will continue to shine as we write more of him for DachaBo, because we're just getting started.

[pompomchihuahua]

Do you think there is anything symbolic on why Sanemi looked the way he did? Out of all the siblings, he is the most distinct with white hair while the rest had black. His hair is also almost the same as his father’s. Whereas Genya looked like some of his brothers, specifically Hiroshi aside from the eyes. Why do you think Gotege made Genya look similar to him, as they both of Mohawks? Also, what’s your opinion on the means of their first and last names? Thanks!

A very interesting question! Thank you so much anon and let's dive in!

So, to start, let's examine what white hair in media typically represents.

White on its own in Japanese culture is often used to represent purity, divinity, truth, simplicity, humility, and mourning.

Traditionally, before Western influence, it was actually commonplace to wear white clothing to funerals rather than black.

In media, white hair can represent many things, depending on what the artist is trying to portray. It can represent wisdom and maturity, which is why you see a lot of mentor-type characters with white hair, like Kakashi from Naruto.

White hair can also be used to denote otherworldly powers, such as in the case of Gojo from JJK, or when you see fantasy races such as elves with white hair. You also see it appear in other places in Demon Slayer, such as with the Spider family.

One thing I've noticed is that Gotouge likes to give in-universe explanations for a lot of the stranger hair colors. Many rely heavily on anime logic, but Mitsuri's wild pink and green hair comes from an overabundance of Sakura mochi. The Rengokus' golden and red-tipped hair comes from a ritual wherein the mother, while pregnant, stares into a flame for hours. Even Zenitsu's striking blond and orange locks have an in-universe explanation - he was struck by lightning and got his wild dye job as a free side effect! The anime gave a retroactive explanation for Genya's yellow highlights too! It's apparently a result of his demon-eating!

But Sanemi is interesting because there is no in-universe explanation for his distinct hair. Even with Tengen Uzui, another white-haired character, when we are briefly shown a faceless shot of his other siblings, we can spot a few who also have white hair, and can infer that it's just a common trait in their family.

So, even amongst white-haired characters, Sanemi is unique in that none of his siblings and neither of his parents have white hair.

I believe Gotouge chose to give Sanemi white hair to denote that he is special amongst his family. In Japan, the most common hair color by far is black, and thus, giving the rest of Sanemi's family black hair may be a way to imply that the rest of Sanemi's family are just "ordinary" people. (Including Genya, who is regularly put down as weak and talentless). It also may be a hint at his Marechi blood, as there is no indication that Genya or any of the other siblings have even a weaker variant of Marechi.

For this analysis, I want to also look at another character who was given white hair, despite having a sibling and parent depicted with black hair: Ume.

In Ume's case, her hair as a human was very deliberately chosen to contribute to her most defining feature: her beauty. The author chose to give her white hair to give her more of an ethereal and distinct look, to emphasize that she was uniquely beautiful and to separate her from the rest.

I find it interesting that as a demon, she chooses to hide her white hair despite it being a carryover from when she was a human and not a specifically demonic feature. This shows, at least to me, that even in-universe, white hair is unusual.

So, we can see the author uses white hair in many ways, specifically to denote when something is unique about a character. They wanted to distinguish Sanemi from the rest of his siblings for many reasons, including: Sanemi always being the only one intended to survive, Sanemi being the only one with special Marechi blood, Sanemi quite possibly being the only one of the siblings even capable of becoming a Hashira, etc.

As far as in-universe explanations go, there's the boring explanation: White hair is a recessive gene in the Shinazugawa family, and Sanemi just happened to inherit all the right gene copies to acquire the white hair phenotype.

However, it could also be that the same recessive gene that gave him his white hair is also what gave him his ultra-rare Marechi blood.

Another theory I've seen floated around is that his hair went white due to stress. However, I feel if this were the case and Sanemi's hair were at any point a different color, we would have gotten some kind of allusion to it.

The final theory I've seen is that Sanemi has albinism. As fun as it would be to imagine, I find this one also highly unlikely, as Sanemi doesn't have any of the other symptoms associated with albinism: i.e., pale skin (he's no paler than any of the other characters), his eyelashes are dark, and he doesn't seem to have any vision problems (the color blindness is highly debatable), no sensitivity to sunlight, etc.

The most likely in-universe explanation is probably the first one: it's a recessive gene. I would place my bets on it being linked to the Marechi gene (there is no evidence to support this but I feel it in my bones).

As for why Genya looked so similar to his siblings, this was likely for the opposite reason they made Sanemi so distinct. Genya was set up narratively as being not special (despite him having one of the most unique powers in the series). Whether Gotouge succeeded at giving Genya the narrative of the "weak one", is another post, but that was the intent, in my opinion.

Now, for their names, Gotouge is well known for their love of hiding hidden meanings within character names!

For example: Tanjirou(炭治郎) I won't go deep into details but there's the kanji for charcoal, heal/cure, and son in there, which basically gives you a nice summary of his character and goal.

So, for the brothers, let's start with their last name: Shinazugawa (不死川)

不 means impossible while 死 means death, so put together, they are "immortal" (This is the Shinazu part of the name) while 川 (the -gawa) is river. Altogether, it roughly translates to "immortal river."

Now, for Sanemi's name. 実弥

実 - (Sane) - truth

弥 - (mi) - complete, full of

実弥 - Complete truth

Then there's Genya.玄弥

Now, keen-eyed readers may have already noticed something. The second kanji in Genya's name and the second kanji in Sanemi's name are the same! (弥) They actually function the same as well despite having different readings too!

弥 - (ya) - complete, full of

Now, 玄 (Gen) is where it gets a little muddied. There are a few different readings you can use for it. One reading is "mysterious, occult." This could be in reference to his demon-eating ability. 玄 can also mean jet black, but I highly doubt that's the intended meaning. And for the last reading, 玄 can mean illusion or lie.

So, with this final interpretation, when you put their names together, Sanemi is the true immortal river, and Genya is the false immortal.

This shows that Genya was always intended to die at the end of Sanemi's arc.

Sorry if this was incomprehensible in some parts. I didn't intend for this to get so long!

TLDR: Sanemi's white hair is most likely a plot device to set him apart as distinct from his siblings and maybe a hint at his Marechi blood and talents. Their names were foreshadowing for how their stories were intended to end.

[musingsofasidechracter]

Image from Pinterest!

*Author’s Note! Please forgive any format issues, this is my first tumblr post literally ever! I decided that if I’m going to scour this site for all the things I love to read, I could contribute as well! Please enjoy the mess inside my head!*

Pairing: poly!marauders x fem!reader

Content Warning: Fluff, angst, hurt/comfort, like two swear words, reader is insecure but the boys make it better!

Missing Piece 🧩

Selfish… That’s the only thing to call this feeling. Because how else does someone describe a feeling of longing when every dream you’ve had for yourself has come true. You were surrounded with love, on every side. Quite literally.

On your left was the calm to every storm life has thrown your way. Your peace, and the only thing you need after anything brings you even slightly down. Your Remus. Your head on his shoulder, one of his hands playing with yours in his lap, attention more or less on the book he was holding. You could feel a chuckle rumble through his chest every now and again, a clear sign he was enjoying the story that Sirius had picked for him.

Oh, Sirius… The man who makes you brave. Who has fought for everything this life has tried to take from him, and who has come out the other side stronger than ever. He makes you feel beautiful and seen. With a lazy smile, or a mischievous glint in his eye, or a rarely serious set of his jaw, he always knows exactly what you need in every moment. Like now, while you show no outward sign of distress, he somehow knows you need a gentle hand in your hair, calmly running his nails over your scalp, in a way he knows brings you immense comfort. He was doing it almost unconsciously, while talking with James about one thing or another.

And James… sunshine incarnate. Always with a smile on his face, his mouth built with a natural upturn. A wicked sense of humor and love to spare. He was so free with the love he gives. Never an hour going by without the words falling from his lips. Like if he didn’t say it enough, his essence would cease to exist. Love shining in his eyes for just about everyone he speaks to. Warmth radiating from him always, like the sun itself. The center of the group you’ve created with these men, pulling you all together. Even now, sitting on the floor in front of the three of you, you notice how your bodies all face him, without a single one of you meaning to do it.

With you in the middle, most people would feel like absolutely nothing could be better… so why, why did you feel so out of place. From the moment you met these three, they have made it clear they wanted you. From that first night out, in a random pub in London…

It was your first true night in your brand new home. You’d moved to London a full week ago, but that was filled with moving boxes, and paperwork, and trying to find the best place to buy all the necessities for your apar….flat… they call it a flat here. Today you opened the last of the boxes that had littered your home, and you felt that was reason enough to celebrate. You called the one person you know on this continent, your cousin, Catherine. She had convinced you to move like she had a year before, and she picked a pub close to you, The Black Dog. You should have known better though, ever the social butterfly, it wasn’t long before Catherine was pulled away by some man hoping to take her home, and you were left at the bar alone. You wouldn’t call yourself an introvert by any means, but a brand new city can be overwhelming enough, and you were content to take it all in rather than dive headfirst into the scene around you.

You ordered your drink, something strong and fruity and moments later it was delivered. It was somewhere between pink and red, in a tall glass, with oranges on the side and cherries sitting on top. You took your first sip, and let out a small noise of appreciation. It was a bit loud in the pub, so you were surprised when the man beside you noticed the sound you made. He turned toward you, smile beaming in a way that almost hurt to look at. You noted then, that this man was like the sun…little did you know how right you were.

”That good, love?” A chuckle fell off of his lips with his words, and you couldn’t help the smile spreading on your face. Maybe it was the shots Catherine had convinced you to take before you left for your evening, or maybe it was the smile that was infectious on his face, or maybe it was the confidence you’d decided you had now that you were brave enough to move across the pond, but something inside you made you respond, “Wanna find out for yourself?”

You held out the drink for him to try. The man’s smile (somehow) widened, and his eyebrows shot overtop of the round glasses on his face. He leaned forward, just in your space, and took a sip from your straw. You noted the curly hair then, that sat messily on top of his head and the fact that whoever was sipping from your drink was one of the most handsome men you’d ever seen. He made a noise similar to the one you had made moments ago and a laugh tumbled out of the both of you. “Seems like it’s that good indeed!” You laugh again at his little joke, sticking your hand out for him and told him your name. “James!” he said in return, but rather than take your hand for a shake, he wrapped his arm around your shoulders and pulled you into his side for a hug. Warmth spread across your body, and for the first time since your plane landed you felt like your were truly home.

He pulled you across the crowded room, arm still around your shoulders as he lead you to a couch with two other men. The curly haired man at your side introduced you to Sirius, the long haired one with a cocky smirk on his face, whose arm was around the other man, who you were told was Remus.

“Like the werewolf story?” He seemed to pale at that, and had you had a bit less liquor in your system you would have noticed. “Like the story of Remus and Romulus! Well, I suppose it isn’t a true werewolf story, the babies were just raised by wolves…at least I think that’s how the story goes, and then they go on to found Rome, so your name is in good company” His shoulders relax at that, and later you would find out just why those words made him antsy around you at first. He chuckled, and stood to shake your hand. Sirius looked to James, a bemused expression on his face, “Where did you find this little dollie, Prongs?” Remus leans into James before he can reply and said just loud enough for the four of you to hear, “I don’t care where you found her, but I kinda want to keep her.” The boys chuckled at the blush that littered your cheeks, and your night went on filled with these three ridiculously attractive men, that you took no time at all to fall in love with.

You often remember that night. How deeply you fell for each of the three men you had met. Months later, as your friendship grew, and you were made aware that the three were all involved in a romantic relationship, they all came to you to express their love for you as well. They asked you to join their relationship and the rest, as they say, was history.

After a year of being together they shared with your their little secret of magic, stunning you into amazed silence as they used it to make your anniversary the most special thing. Later that night, as you sat in bed with them, basking in the glow of your night together, Remus was in tears as he shared with you his “furry little problem” as the boys would refer to it. You joked that you were in too deep at that point, so even if you had wanted to walk away (you hadn’t considered it for a second) you wouldn’t have been able to leave them. A week later they had asked you to move in with them. James and Sirius both came from money, lots of it you had gathered, and so the home they all shared was more than big enough. Catherine had joked with you that you had scored bigger than she ever could as she helped you to get settled into your new life with the men you loved so much.

Here you were a month later, and selfish was the only thing you felt that you could put into words. Because even though you were the happiest you had ever been, with three men to love you and a life that was more perfect than you could have imagined for yourself, you felt…wrong. Maybe this was just the honeymoon phase wearing off, but you couldn’t help but notice the cracks you felt forming around you. You couldn’t quite explain it, but you felt…other. Separate. You knew you were solidly a part of the group around you, but you felt still somehow on the outside. Like the last book in a series, written decades after the original trilogy. You hated feeling this way, and you hated more that you didn’t know how to fix it. You were on your own in your head with it though, wholly unwilling to bring it up to your lovers, afraid to point out what they seemed oblivious to. What if, once you pointed it out, they wouldn’t be able to ignore it any further. They’d realize how out of place you were with them, and it would be the beginning of the end for you and them.

“Dove, would you care to tell me why you’re crying?” Remus whispered in your ear. You hadn’t even noticed the tears falling from your eyes. “I know Pads and Prongs are droning on about nothing, but that’s no reason to be upset.”

Sirius and James looked up at this, hearing their names more than what else Remus had said. A slightly offended, “Hey” fell from James’s mouth before he caught onto the tear tracks coming down your face. He moved to his knees just in front of you and took your hands in his. Sirius straightened up and turned his whole body towards you, his full attention on you now, the hand that was just scratching your scalp now resting on the small of your back. Three sets of eyes looked at your face, while you were unable to meet any one of them.

“Doll, what the hell is going on?” Sirius’s tone was firm, edging on panic. Of the three of them, he was the most sensitive to negative emotions (thank you very much Walburga Black), and the curse fell from his lips, not out of anger, but agony at seeing one of his lovers anything less than happy. “You’ve been off for a few days, is it all coming out now?” Being that emotionally intelligent was the work of James and Remus over their many years together. While Sirius hated seeing a negative emotion, he was often the one to realize the root of it.

“I…” you didn’t know what to say to these men you loved so much, and instead of words, sobs ran out of your mouth without ever being told they could. The three all but suffocated you with their love. Remus pulled you to his lap and moved to the middle of the couch, making room for James to join you off the floor. Two more sets of arms wrapped around your body, and words you couldn’t quite make out surrounded you. Sweet nothings and words of encouragement, you were sure. Not an ounce of judgement could be felt in the room, and for that thought alone you cried for longer.

Once you were settled down, finally pulling your face out of the crook of Remus’s neck where you had found strength and comfort, you were finally able to meet their eyes. “I’m so sorry…”

“Nothing to apologize for, love…” A hint of a smile hit your lips at the nickname for you that James had never quite dropped since first meeting you. “We’re just worried for you, but that’s no reason to say you’re sorry. Should… should WE be apologizing…?” That brought more tears to your eyes, though you were able to let them fall quietly this time. You hated that James jumped to something they might have done wrong, as if they could ever be less than perfect to you.

“No! Never, my love. You’ve all been so amazing to me, always…from that very first night. It’s just…” You couldn’t help but notice the way their shoulders relaxed at that, though their attention never wavered off of you. You knew then that you had to come clean. You couldn’t be the reason they felt they were anything less than perfect.

“You’re all so perfect for each other… and then there’s just me. I mean, you’ve all had years together, and you have so much history. Like all the way back to high school, history. And before that! You’ve known each other since you were eleven, and you’ve BEEN together since, what seventeen or eighteen? That’s more than a decade of falling into a rhythm together and then I show up and just… I don’t know why you needed me. I know you love me, don’t get me wrong. It would be impossible not to feel the love you all have. But I just feel like… a piece of a puzzle that doesn’t quite fit…”

The three were uncharacteristically quiet. They didn’t know what to say to let you know how wrong you were. After a full minute looking at you, hurting to see you hurt, it was no surprise that Remus was the one to speak first.

“Dove, can you please… give us an example? I don’t think we quite understand what you mean.” You thought about it. You needed them to see that it wasn’t their fault, that it was you that was wrong. You tried to remove your emotion from it, to use what you thought was logic about the situation.

“Okay…an example… Last week, when that black envelope showed up at the window, and none of you blinked at the fact that an owl was delivering mail at night . James didn’t hesitate to take it and throw it in the fireplace, while Remus walked straight to you, Sirius and just hugged you for a while. I still barely know what that was about. I just sat there wondering why the mood shifted in the room, and the three of you fell into this routine that I didn’t even know needed to happen.

Or every month, when Remus needs some taking care of. I know I can’t go out with the three of you, but when you got back from that night a couple weeks ago from wherever it is that you need to go, you fell into a routine I didn’t know how to join into, again. Sirius grabbed the weird bottles from the cabinet I can’t reach, and James got the first aid kit that Remus always keeps stocked and you went into the big bathroom and took care of what needed to be done. And then you all fell into bed together, and even when you pulled me into you, James, I felt like I had no right be there, and interrupt the way you were taking care of each other.

Or even when we all sleep together in that giant bed… You three had a way of crawling into bed and moulding yourselves around each other, and before it was a fun sleepover, but now that I live here, I’m just interrupting that every night. We have to think about who is next to who and who’s turn it is to be next to who and its just… I’m the difference. I’m the one who disrupts all those routines and the one who doesn’t get the inside jokes and the one who needs to be told how magic works… and I just…” Three sets of eyes met each other and, as if to prove your point, had a silent conversation without you.

“That’s just what I mean!” You stood up, unable to be in between them, cutting them off from each other for a second longer. Your hands dragged through your hair, and down your face as you tried to keep yourself calm while already missing the warmth of the three of them. “You all just had a full conversation and didn’t have to say a single word. I can’t do that with you at all, but you shouldn’t have to explain it to me after the fact…that’s not fair to you. I should just… get it.”

Sirius stood and took a step toward you. You wanted to step away, tell him to go back to the men on the couch, but if you were feeling selfish tonight, then you supposed you could be one more time before they decided you were right. He took your hand and pulled you into his chest, and his next words broke you.

“You’re right…” He felt your body tense, and heard the intake of air in your lungs and was quick to clarify his meaning. “Not about most of that, not about you not fitting, but about a couple of things. The lads and I do have history together. History that we can’t make go away, and no matter how much we might want to it’s history we can’t fit you into. We can’t help that my love… but that and your second right point go well together. We can have a conversation without words, but we’re always more than happy to pull you into that loop. And would you like to know what we were just thinking with one another?” You nodded your head from his chest and looked up at him. He turned to James, who had tears in his eyes at the sight before him, and came to take you into his own arms.

“Shortly after we graduated and we were in our very first flat together,” he said in between kisses to your hairline, “Remus all but had a panic attack. It was terribly tough to see him suffer through some kind of emotion Sirius and I couldn’t understand. He himself found it hard to put into words what he was so upset about. We got him calmed down and when he was finally able to put his feelings into words, the only word he could think of was incomplete.”

You looked to Remus, a question written all over your face and he stood and joined you. You were passed into his arms this time and he pulled you into the crook of his neck again. He started swaying to some music only he could hear, and he spoke low and calm, with some other emotion lacing his voice. “I just felt that we weren’t done yet… the three of us. I couldn’t explain it, and I felt like a right idiot for even thinking it. I was surround by two loves of my life, who gave me every bit of themselves, who I hoped to share every part of myself with, and I felt that, for some reason, part of my heart was still missing. But because, like you said, we’re all so in sync with each other, the moment I could say what was on my mind, they told me they’d been feeling it too.” Sirius wrapped his arm around the both of you, joining you in your sway. He spoke barely above a whisper.

“There is an area of magic called Divination, and witches and wizards hold varying degrees of belief in it, but it looks to the future. A GOOD Seer can tell you what hasn’t happened yet . So James here, decided to call one up. He needed to know if anything was meant to happen that could take this feeling from us away. He felt it too, but he couldn’t stand to see Remus so out of sorts over something we weren’t sure was meant for us. But he went and found something out, that he kept a secret for a long, long time.”

James himself spoke up at this, a cheery, prideful tone to his voice, “Hardest thing I had EVER done, keeping that from these two! But finally the time came for me to spill, on none other than the night I saw a pretty girl in a bar making the sweetest, happiest noises at a drink in her hand. The Seer confirmed that something was missing in our lives. That three was never enough for our group, and that the love we had to spare for each other, wasn’t spare love at all. It was meant for someone else. She described to me… so perfectly now actually. Hang on…”

He left for his office, a room you rarely go in for lack of understanding anything held there. Remus moved you back to the couch, but it was Sirius who claimed you for his lap. He whispered low in your ear, “You’re going to love this next part, dollie…” You smiled a him, a proper one this time. You had a feeling you knew what the rest of this story held but you waited to hear for yourself. James returned moments later and handed you a worn piece of paper. You could tell it had been folded and unfolded many times. He continued this story holding the paper in your hand until he was ready to let you open it.

“The Seer described, and even sketched for me, the thing that was missing from us. I didn’t understand it at all at the time, but all was clear to me that night we met. I felt so drawn to you, from that first little noise you made and the second I saw you, my breath was stolen. I had to drag you over to meet the others, I had to make sure they were as drawn to you as I was. And then that night, after we were home, with the most ridiculous happy tears flowing, I told them what I had done years before and I showed them what you have in your hand…” He let your hands go, and signaled you to open the folded paper. You looked to the three of them, making eye contact with each of them, and in their eyes you saw the same thing: love, admiration, and pure joy. When you looked to the picture in your hands a very different set of tears sprung from your eyes.

A white snake wrapped around a black crescent moon, with stars scattered around it. To anyone else this would have meant absolutely nothing, but to you it shifted the world on its axis. You had gotten this exact image tattooed just under the bend of your elbow during the last week in your home town. Catherine had convinced you to get it, while she had its sister marked on her own arm. A tattoo you had gotten on a whim, to commemorate the changes you hoped to come in your future. You breath caught, and you were unable to form words. It was Sirius who finished the story for you.

“After that night at the pub, we talked about you the whole way home. We all decided we were just taken with you. Your wit, your sense of humor, how wicked smart you are, how well you were able to take our shit and throw it right back at us. We all knew life wasn’t going to be the same any more, and we were all so excited for the change the winds were bringing. And when we heard what James had done and saw the picture of that tattoo we’d spent minuets discussing with you, everything clicked for us. We were half in love with you already, and that just confirmed that we were always meant to have you. So that… that is what you mean. You mean completion for us. Wholeness. We were never done, not until you breezed into our lives. You were the missing piece of us, and you fit so, so right. The rest of it will come with time. We’ll teach you how to help Moony when we get back from the full moon. I’ll explain all the black envelopes I can’t look at to you. We’ll make more inside jokes that anyone but the four of us would never have a prayer of understanding. The magic will become mundane for you one day too. And for heavens sake, the only reason there is a debate on whose turn it is to sleep next to who, is because we’re all so jealous when we’re the one who can’t be right next to you, and Remus says we aren’t allowed to just dog pile on top of you because we’ll ‘suffocate’ you.” You laughed at that, a real one this time.

You looked around at the boys, and noticed how well they had formed around you. For perhaps the first time, you saw it too, how well the four of you fit together. Sirius was right, with time you would have a rich history with them as well. One you would be able to look back on with joy and love in your heart. You met their eyes again, and leaned in to kiss each of them one at a time.

“Thank you for loving me so much. I could never have imagined myself with three different people to love, but now that I have it I couldn’t imagine loving anyone else, and I couldn’t imagine a single day without the three of you to make it better. Thank you for telling me that story. I needed it, my loves. I’m sorry I was feeling some type of way. I really can’t remember why now…”

“It’s okay, dollie, sometimes I cry just for the attention too,” Sirius said with a smirk.

[rune-rambles-art]

Okay I have to yell about Koleda Belobog Zenless Zone Zero because I feel like I love her in a very specific way that I haven’t seen a lot of people talk about. More under the cut because I have,,, so many thoughts.

Koleda is such a good portrayal of someone who struggles with their perception as an adult. A pretty easy conclusion to make with the first thing she usually says on the character select screen being “Hey, don’t look down on me!”, but it definitely goes a lot deeper the more you spend time with her. Specifically, she seems to struggle in her perception of herself as someone much more mature than her younger peers, but still not on the same level as the adults in similar positions of power as her. I kinda. Hate zenless for not explicitly stating how old she is, but given she rose to her position at Belobog “when she came of age” (which honestly, I still can’t give a concrete answer to what hoyo means by this? Some searches I found claimed the working age to be 16 in China, I’ve seen others online claim 18 but that’s not reliable. Hoyo I'm begging you put official ages on your characters it's a cool and based practice), she waited for a significant amount of time before taking up her role as president. She is an adult from what the game implies, and a core part of her character is fighting against the constant infantilization she faces due to how she looks.

Let’s start with her love of desserts (and a honestly this is the reason I started writing this). It’s her most highlighted character trait (it is also the first known attribute in her trust rank profile when you unlock her), and most of her trust events on 6th street revolves around them. Initially, she hesitates in proclaiming her love for them, likely to avoid being perceived as childish.

Her rank 4 trust special event is, admittedly, my favorite, but it’s one of the best breakdowns of this.

In order to maintain her image as a mature adult, she uses her position as company president to get around having to request a special dessert drink by name (in her defense, "Sweet Girl Fluffy Marshmallow Lambkin Milk" is an insane mouthful of a product name). At the end of the event she admits that saying its name “wasn’t as bad as she thought”, but her initial kneejerk reaction was a complete rejection of even entertaining the idea of doing something that could put the image she worked so hard to create and maintain at risk. Despite this, she still refuses desserts that aren't tooth-rottingly sweet, even if they are seen as the more mature or "refined" option. It's only around people that she really trusts does she allow this part of herself to be known, because she knows they wouldn't misconstrue this behavior as childish.

I also think her perception on the differences between kids and adults is interesting ("thank you agent story quest" we all say in unison). She doesn't ever feel like she fits in with other kids, probably due to all the responsibility she had to take on as the eventual heir to her father's company. But she also holds a vocal distain for many of her adult peers. Her declaration of "When I was younger, I thought the whole world was rotten, trying to make people just as rotten when they grow up." is a reflection of how she struggled to find her place in the world as she was forced to suddenly transition into adulthood, while still trying to understand the actions of the adults around her.

Her relationship with her father becoming strained contributed significantly to her world outlook as well, and may have caused such a specific distinction of what she deems "the world of adults". I don't want to dive too specifically into that because spoilers and the game is only a few weeks old so. Pin that for another time maybe? It definitely matters in the sense that the loss of her father is the catalyst for the loss of her childhood, but a lot of the specifics in how that affected her are speculative (and I don't wanna get too headcanon-y in this particular post) and she explicitly chooses not to discuss it too in-depth with the proxy (which, girl. Valid). But she's slowly learning to cope with that loss, at least it seems that way by the end of chapter 3. Honestly I could probably find more to add about the agent story in particular, but I would have to replay it to get a better idea.

To me, Koleda Belobog is very solid representation for women who had to grow up too fast, struggle with the perception of being seen as an adult, and hold guilt about indulging in acts that can be perceived as childish by their peers because they never fully got the chance to just be a kid. It truly did resonate with me, and it feels like such a specific "if you know, you know" kind of experience that I don't feel is talked about as much in media, especially with people who identify as female during their youth.

Also, also! I hope they dive in a bit more on how she got/has so much hollow corruption at a young age. Because they imply that she is so short as a result of this hollow corruption. Like that's so damn interesting conceptually and I know they delved on it more in Rina's agent story but. It was more of a mental affliction than a physical one.

Anyway I've been working on this for like 2 days now but that's all I have in terms of like. A canon-compliant character analysis.

TLDR; Koleda is such a perfect example of "God forbid short women exist" and I love her for that. Thank you for coming to my TED Talk.

[archivistofnerddom]

The Batch + Life In Retirement On Pabu

Slightly AU: Tech lives, though he’s got a prosthetic leg as a result of his fall.

Hunter’s fashion sense swiftly nose-dives into that of every dad at an amusement park. Don’t ask why that happened so quickly. It just did. He’s rocking cargo shorts, corny shirts, and comfy shoes like they’re going out of style. (Crosshair gave him a tactical fanny pack as a joke. Hunter wears it all the time with all due seriousness.) It takes years for the rest of the Batch to get him to branch out from that.

Tech alternates between his space jeans and sweatpants, depending on his mood. The sweatpants were necessary when he first got his prosthetic leg during his post-Eriadu recovery process. He too starts wearing ironic shirts, but somehow makes them more fashionable than Hunter.

Crosshair has the widest selection of island-appropriate hats and sunglasses anyone has ever seen. No one knows how he gets so many, and he’s certainly not going to tell on himself. Omega is the reason why he has so many floral-print shirts though.

Wrecker discovers overalls and pretty much lives in them. No less than half of his overalls have the legs cut off at the knees. This is more practical than fashionable though. He’s just so big that he has a hard time finding pants that fit him at the waist and have a long enough pant leg.

Omega finally gets to decide on her preferred style now that they’re permanently in one place. She still wears a lot of hand-me-downs from her brothers though. Omega spends a lot of time helping out around the island, so she needs clothes that no one minds her getting dirty or ruined when she’s working on a project.

Echo has an extensive collection of sarongs he stores on Pabu that he only busts out when he’s visiting. Rex knows not to ask Echo to do anything if he sees him wearing one. (Visiting the family on Pabu is the only time Echo gets a break or a chance to relax and destress.)

Batcher gets a pretty collar and a massively cushy bed. Someone starts bringing her sweaters to wear when she gets cold. (Crosshair is the leading suspect. Hunter won’t confess to anything.)

Wrecker has an extremely extensive cookbook and recipe collection. He picks up cooking as a hobby post-retirement, and he is really good at it. Given the diversity of people and species on Pabu, Wrecker spends a lot of time learning different recipes from across the galaxy.

Crosshair and Wrecker go fishing together pretty regularly. They don’t say a lot during those times, but that’s okay. Crosshair enjoys spotting where the best fishing areas are. Wrecker just sits back and lets his baby brother take the lead on this. (He brings snacks and a cooler of drinks to keep them fed and hydrated when they decide to make a day of it.)

Tech upgrades the Archeum to improve how things are stored and protected. Omega helps out. They spend a lot of time adding details about the specific items housed therein, including any historical details, cultural relevance, and any notes about how best to handle the items. They’re working with Phee on an oral history component to the Archeum as well, so that the stories about the items in the Archeum and the residents of Pabu are preserved.

Crosshair makes hammocks and strings them up around the island in random places. He says it’s so that he can take a nap wherever and whenever. Really, it’s just his contribution to life on Pabu. (Plus, making hammocks were good physical therapy when he got his new prosthetic hand.)

Omega instituted regular family game night. (Echo is expected to be there as his work with Rex allows.) Depending on their moods, Batch family game night is either extremely chill or extremely cutthroat. There is no in-between.

Wrecker is the first one to “move out” of the shared family house. It’s only because he built an upgraded kitchen with a huge family room attached. The shared family home couldn’t accommodate those upgrades. His house is two houses down and is still where everyone eats dinner almost every night.

Tech moved out second. He moved in with Phee. It was a combination of their evolving romantic relationship and him wanting to be closer to the island repair shop that he runs in his spare time. (Tech became the island’s mechanic once he recovered from the injuries he sustained on Eriadu.)

Hunter develops a massive green thumb. The family shared house (which eventually is just him, Omega, and Crosshair full-time) is overflowing with plant life. He built and maintains a greenhouse for Wrecker to grow speciality plants for his cooking.

Echo usually crashes with Wrecker when he comes to visit. Wrecker renovated part of his house to be prosthetic leg friendly and got a really comfy recliner for Echo. Crosshair put in a hammock for Echo in the backyard.

Crosshair, Hunter, and Omega go on early morning runs together. It’s their bonding time.

Tech upgraded the whole family’s prosthetic limbs many times over the years. Hunter made a point of keeping the older models as a reminder of how far they’ve come since they retired.

Batcher is the most spoiled dog on the island. She adores the attention and winds up becoming the unofficial therapy dog for every new resident and refugee who finds their way to Pabu.

[mochiajclayne]

thoughts on naruhina + boruto and their...family

Will preface this by saying that this is a combination of observation and analysis and if you don't agree with me, take this with a grain of salt and scroll away.

(If you're a naruhina/nh shipper, do yourself a favor and scroll away because this isn't your cup of tea.)

sasusaku + sarada version.

Personally, it's almost emotionally triggering for me to watch the NH family because it reminded me of what my family dynamic used to be and witnessing it unfold in the sequel from a viewer's perspective made me realize how dysfunctional it is and what could've been done better.

Let's start at the issue at hand: Naruto not coming home, being too busy as Hokage to the point that he misses important family events like birthdays.

Boruto's reaction to the issue is realistic, especially to a kid that doesn't understand. I'm not saying that Naruto doesn't have a contribution to that mess at all (it's worse when you realize that he would rather be in his office worrying about the number of headbands than be with his family but that is a separate discussion that I will dive on in the near future, among other things). Basically, he wanted his father to be, well, present, so he does everything to get his attention. And no, those pranks aren't pointless. Being a Hokage means attending public functions and being involved with the community and what's the best freaking way to get your dad's attention by embarrassing him while on the job (which happens to be the same thing that stands between him being a good father)? Now, this wouldn't escalate into massive proportions like cheating-on-the-Chunin-exams level if Hinata was able to placate and explain things to her son.

In terms of explaining, there are several things to consider:

realizing the issue

being logical about the reasons

seeing eye to eye with your kid, emphasizing on how your kid perceived this issue emotionally and determining what they want

not making excuses and stating the reasons in the perspective that your kid can understand

openly communicating the issue to the ones in concern and expressing your stance on this, hearing them out, and reaching a consensus (or a conclusion)

But the thing is, Hinata herself doesn't see the problem, thus eliminating the chance to see her kid eye-to-eye on this particular issue--given that they aren't on the same page from the start. It's baffling as well as concerning to see that she doesn't have any qualms with her husband making a secondary residence in the Hokage Office, sleeping on the couch and not on their shared bed, overworking himself to the point that even his freaking advisor tells him to go the fuck home, would rather eat cup ramen than enjoy a home cooked meal, and the tipping point: is okay with her husband sending a clone to celebrate their daughter's birthday.

And her telling Boruto that his father is the Hokage and it's a busy position pretty much doesn't cover how fucked up the issue is. Boruto could easily counter that with well Shikadai's dad is the Hokage advisor but he can go home so what's stopping mine from doing the same? In short, she keeps on excusing the behavior which in turn gives off that Naruto prioritizes the job the most and their family clearly comes second and oh my, does that sound so appealing on a child's ears? Definitely not.

The point is, a kid would go through drastic measures to find the assurance and approval that they need especially if it wasn't provided to them. The pranks stopped when Sasuke entered the picture. He was able to talk to Boruto about his dad. Give opinions about Naruto as the person, not just someone in a high position. That's exactly what Boruto needed to hear.

Now you may wonder why Sasuke was able to do this and not Hinata? That's because Sasuke pretty much understands Naruto and he is able to provide more input about Naruto outside of his achievements and position. Not to mention that Sasuke pretty much took Boruto under his wing to train him if he wanted to defeat his dad. And one thing about Sasuke is he isn't pretty much holding back when he calls out Boruto, something I've noticed that Hinata wasn't able to do. Watching the scene of Sasuke scolding Boruto in front of his own mother is pretty funny because why is your husband's best friend giving off mother more than you?

[varusha-asmoday]

Satan is the God of Suffering. Why the HELL would somebody worship that?

This is a question that I imagine pops into a lot of people’s heads whenever I’m talking with them about my faith and practices. And you know, it’s with good reason that it is a question one would ask. Christianity and the rest of the Abrahamic faiths have done an impressive job at painting the Devil and his other portrayals as a god of malice, temptation, and pure evil. And now you have me, a Theistic Satanist seemingly elaborating on that point in calling him the God of Suffering. It doesn’t make me look good without me taking the time to explain and break down what it all means to me, so that’s what I’ll be doing in this post here.

Before I get into the whole God of Suffering part of things, I’m gonna first dive into who Satan is based on the etymology of his name.

Satan’s Name

If you’re reading this in English, then you should be familiar with the name Satan. Other spellings and iterations of this name exist such as: Satanas, Shatan/Shaitan, Al-Shaytan, Ha-Satan, Satanael, etc. These all find their origins in Satan— a Hebrew word meaning “adversary, accuser, or to oppose/obstruct” Adversary is defined as “one’s opponent in a contest, conflict, or dispute” Satan gets his “evilness” due to his opposition to God and to the Abrahamic faiths, that is enough to deem something as evil. “If you are not with me, then you are my enemy.” kinda thing. (Shoutout to Star Wars for that perfect parallel lmao) I do not think this is a good mindset to carry and impose on others, as it creates a deeply-rooted intolerance for opposition and adversity when these are just natural parts of life. Differences should be celebrated and more thought should go into whether something is good or bad for you than just the fact that it is contrary to what you believe.

The God of Suffering

Suffering is defined as “the state of undergoing pain, distress, or hardship.” Suffering is not a human concept, rather it is something that exists universally and is a part of the natural world— of nature. Satan is a nature god in this sense. Natural disasters, disease, predation— suffering has its place in nature. A harsh world shapes its inhabitants, and in response, these inhabitants learn to survive, to cope, to refine themselves. Natural selection, evolution, competition, these are all concepts born of suffering— of hardship.

We as humans have regrettably contributed greatly to the suffering in this world. Hatred, violence, war, genocide. These are aspects of human suffering, and they have existed alongside humanity for as long as our history goes. This is the depiction of Satan that is spread like wildfire and most people would associate these acts with Satan. The major religions of the world have tacked the Devil’s name to the worst aspects of humanity, when in actuality, it is the fault of us as humans for human suffering. Hell, it’s even in the name, how could we get it so wrong? Humans are responsible for how humans are treated, imagine that. Accountability.

Does this mean I wish suffering upon others?

Gods, no. I wish nothing but the best for all people— as human beings. Sure there are horrible people who do horrible things to others and deserve the absolute worst in return, but at the end of the day we as human beings all deserve love and happiness and safety. Some people just never got what they needed and get really lost and tear down others with them. The world can be cruel and unfair in so many ways, and I wouldn’t want anyone to suffer if it were up to me. But it isn’t. When I say Satan is the God of Suffering, I also mean it in the sense that he is the God of THE Suffering, or rather those that suffer. Victims of suffering. Those who are oppressed, subjugated, discriminated against— Satan is the god who looks over those people. Satan is a God of Liberation, of reclaiming power for oneself. Historically, devil worship (and witchcraft in general) was a religion of slaves and serfdom. These people practiced in retaliation against their cruel lords and the God they worshipped. These people weren’t oppressed because they were witches, they became witches because they had been oppressed and Satan was their liberator. Satan is rebellion, Satan is liberation.

Suffering is always going to exist in our world whether we like it or not, and the best we can do about it— for ourselves and for those around us is make our peace with that fact. Become better people. Act out of love and good intentions, but not turning our backs to suffering. To ignore suffering is to invite it upon yourself. Suffering, as a universal force, is something that can be harnessed for good if we carry it with the right mindset. Let’s say I want to become a bodybuilder, it’s going to take a lot of hard work, strenuous exercise, blood, sweat, and tears. But it will feel really good when I reach my goal and all of that hardship was worthwhile. When we take all of that suffering and point it towards a goal, it doesn’t feel as such, rather it moves like a well-oiled machine towards something better.

Closing Thoughts

I’m a huge fan of the phrase “Do no harm, but take no shit.” And I believe this is a mentality we as humans should all adopt and hold dear. Nothing good comes from pointless hate, violence, and suffering, but a world can be rebuilt with love, compassion, and community. Hold these concepts dearly, but also be willing to fight for yourself if you must. There are truly rotten people in this world of whom would inflict pain and suffering upon others for their own agendas or beliefs. Do not lot those people win. Do not let them destroy you. Do not let your suffering be in vain.

Suffering is always going to be around, so I might as well make my peace with it and live each day striving to create a better world.

Satan is always going to be around, so I might as well make my peace with him and live each day striving to create a better world.

Now tell me, does that make me evil?

[kbookblurbs]

Wind and Truth - Brandon Sanderson (Stormlight Archive #5)

4/5 - midseason-finale ass book; he needs to scrap this editor; this book simply never ends

MAJOR SPOILERS BELOW!! LIKE FIRST LINE!!!

We finally come to the end of the first arc of the Stormlight Archives and they are going to need a new name. Before we dive in, I want to clarify that I did enjoy this book! I think it tackled a series of very hard-to-conclude plotlines in a relatively good way, and I think it sets Sanderson up for success in the latter half of this series. With that said, I'll be splitting this review into four parts:

Kaladin, Szeth, & therapy speak

The Spiritual Realm plot

Azir

Book mechanics

Kaladin, Szeth, & Therapy Speak

Now first of all, anyone who's read anything I've written knows I love Kaladin - he's one of my favorite characters of all time and his journey through depression is one of my favorite parts of this series. That said. I find the whole timeline of this healing to be highly suspect, and his attempts at therapizing embarrassing at best and deeply annoying at worst. What context is there for him to go from literally attempting suicide in the last book to semi-competent therapist in no time at all? Need I remind Sanderson myself that there is no time skip between the end of RoW and WaT?

The language is also just bafflingly modern in a way that nothing in this series has been before, but we'll get to more on that later.

The flip side of this criticism is that Szeth's plotline was easily my favorite of the book. His completed arc might rise to rivaling Kaladin's (thus far) in terms of how much I enjoyed it. His backstory is so tragic (slay for the almost successful military coup though?) and I truly believed he wasn't going to make it through the book until the very last page. His moments with his father, in the past and present, brought me to tears more than once.

The Spiritual Realm Plot

This whole plotline took too long and frankly, it was boring. Watching Shallan slay her demons for the umpteenth time and deal with Formless again and kill her mother again was, and this may be controversial, not a very interesting plot point to me. She's done all this before. I feel that this book, as a whole, gave diminishing returns on her pagetime to character development ratio. I also don't feel that Shallan, with all her everything else, needed a Herald as a mother as another twist, but maybe that will be more relevant in the future. For that reason, and that reason only, I'll bite my tongue on criticizing it unnecessarily

While it was nice to see Renarin and Rlain get together, I have to admit that Renarin's POV didn't add much for me. I think Sanderson could have written the entire plotline for these two from Rlain's perspective and it would've been far more interesting since he is, in my opinion, the more interesting character between the two of them. Renarin's POV does not reveal anything that isn't already clear from other POVs.

I also just wanted more of Ba-Ado-Mishram. She was haunting the story but not present. I understand that's likely for later plot reasons, but it did make this section drag. Dalinar contributed to that but  we don't have time to get into that right now. I was happy he died though (long overdue, in my opinion).

Azir

Adolin #1 character of all time? The only one to save their assigned city and did it with 0 Radiants and the power of friendships? Nobody is doing it like him.

I loved the founding of the Unoathed and, particularly, Yanagawn's development. I'm really hoping that Yanagawn becomes a more important character in next major arc, since he was so sweet here.

I did not love that we spent probably 25% of the book in Azir fighting battles. Contrary to the opinion of Sanderson many fantasy authors, there is an upper limit on how many battles you can include before I get tired of reading them. There's only so many ways you can swing a sword or block a pike etc etc before I'm bored.

Book Mechanics

Overall, I find this concluding book to be much weaker than the other 4 in the series. Whereas it had seemed that the pacing was improving in Oathbreaker and Rhythm of War, here we were back to all over the place. While I liked that he split the plot into each day leading up to the contest, the timeline genuinely made no sense.

Beyond that, this entire book was filled with oddly YA-style prose that has never appeared in the Stormlight Archive until now. I think whoever edited this book must be different from the other four because, in my opinion, it was much too modern, not as tight, and frankly, not as good. And I know this might be controversial, but I did not think Maya calling Adolin a slut was funny. Why would she even use that word? Whore or prostitute would've been acceptable because they've been referenced here before but I found that example and others like it to be jarring.

Conclusion

I liked this book, but it's by a longshot my least favorite in the series. It was too long and frankly, some of the characters didn't even sound like themselves. I know that Sanderson can do better than this, but it leaves me a little wary for the next arc.

There's lots here I didn't cover (Jasnah my beloved, Sigzil! I'm in mourning) but this was already quite long. DMs / ask box are always open if you'd like to chat more.

[itsallpoliticsstupid]

The US Presidential Election 2024 - A mini Deep Dive into what went wrong for the Democrats

I would say this will be my last post on the US Presidential Election of 2024, but we all know it won't be.

I wanted to bring all my thoughts together as to what I perceive the biggest issues for the Democrats were, and how this needs to be rectified in 2028. Well, they won't listen to some random person on a Politics blog with *checks* 44 followers (oh hi, thanks for following), but this is my opinion.

And interestingly, it all starts with the sale of a certain social media platform.

October 2022 - Elon Musk buys Twitter

In my personal opinion the acquisition of Twitter was a major contributing factor to how the election was won. Elon Musk has never been quiet about his Political leanings being closer to the Conservative ideology and how he believed that it was wrong to silence those on the right for their views. So Trump et al. Going as far as to reinstate their accounts.

We all know that Twitter has now become a very toxic place. With extreme ideological views. I feel it was easy to use this platform to peddle a more Trump ideal for the election. It's still one of the biggest platforms out there, why wouldn't it be used to try and win an election. And without it, it would have made things significantly harder for the Republicans to reach a larger audience.

Anyway, this isn't just me twitter bashing. This is me actually analyzing what the situation is.

So back to what the Democrats did wrong.

Joe Biden confirms he will run for President

I believe the election was lost from the moment that Joe Biden made the decision to stand as President for a second term.

This is where everything fell apart, and set a tone for the remainder of the election. Joe Biden was not medically fit to run for the Presidency, and it had been so clear towards the end of his first term as President. You could see he was struggling in front of camera. Getting words wrong. Forgetting the most basic of things. It was a bad look for the Democrat's, and something that the Republican's could easily jump on.

It meant they could capitalize on it and make the Democrat's look like a party of weak leadership.

By the time he dropped out, Kamala Harris had approximately 100 days of campaigning. It wasn't enough. It didn't allow her to really put herself forward as an ideal candidate.

Which leads me to...

Kamala Harris - what did she stand for?

Outside of the right to healthcare/abortions I can't name what Kamala Harris stood for in this election. To me she was a status quo candidate at a time where American's needed assurances due to the increase in cost of living; terrible wars in the Middle East and Ukraine; and high levels of immigration.

Regardless of how bad Trump's policies were (and as we are seeing they are BAD) they were offering an alternative. One that people have been crying out for because they're struggling with the most basic things in their life.

Unfortunately the alternative is likely to make things significantly worse for the American people. But when somebody is saying they will lower costs for you, it's something you take at face value. Especially if you don't necessary understand the impact of raising tariffs or the removal of the affordable care act.

It's just sad that the Democrat campaign was so bad and didn't offer an alternative, it allowed this to happen.

Celebrity Endorsements

I was in two minds about what to put next. This or negative campaigning. But I think this one works.

Whilst Trump was backed by people like Elon Musk, I don't believe he had anywhere near the level of celebrity endorsements that Kamala had, and it very often doesn't work in a persons favor for a couple of reasons.

The first is I think there was a heavy reliance on people listening to their favorite celebrities when considering who to vote for. But in many cases, people will see an endorsement from Taylor Swift, or Misha Collins, or Bruce Springsteen and think 'well, what the hell do they know about what I am currently facing.' A lot of people will view celebrities as out of touch with the reality of today's world.

I'm not saying this is always the case. But that's what the average voter who has zero understanding of Politics will think. That somebody who has millions in the bank will never understand the struggles of having to hold down three jobs to feed your children, or pay your mortgage. And yes, there is a level of cognitive dissonance there because they don't think the same for Trump or Musk, but they seem them as a ruling elite who have the knowledge to make things better for the country. Not just a 'bleeding heart liberal' who just hates the right and has no business being in Politics.

I see the second that it took away from Kamala Harris as a candidate, and shielded a lot of the issues that she had. I think the endorsements worked for Obama because he had charisma. He offered something different. But for Harris, it was just a shield to show she had nothing.

And really, for the reasons above, it was a shield that didn't work as many people were turned off and inevitably chose not to vote.

Negative Campaigning

It never works. It's as simple as that. It never works.

And ultimately I feel that's what the Democrat campaign boiled down to. Being as negative as possible about the Republican's. About their views on abortion. About how many of them are Russian sympathisers. About Trump's health. And that always leaves people thinking 'they can't be that bad though.' And I think a lot of people got turned off by voting Democrat for that reason.

There is more. If I was to do more research I could continue for hours with this. Maybe I will come back with a part 2 when I have had more time to digest everything. But right now, these to me have been the biggest drivers behind the Democrat's losing the election.

And not the fact Kamala Harris was a woman like some people who like to believe.

It's time for the Democrats to stop burying their head in the sand and listen in time for the 2028 election.

[crystallinecardinal]

So I was thinking about Starlo and Chujin

Hi. I love overanalysis. It’s in my blog title as “lore enthusiast.” Most of this probably means nothing and was unintentional, but I’m like an English teacher when it comes to media I like and am scrounging for canon content— I will see something that might have capital I Implications if you think about it hard enough, and I will shake you by the shoulders and go “WHAT DOES IT MEAAAN”

Which brings me to Starlo and Chujin and a thing I noticed while looking through the Spriter’s Resource for Starlo references. Long rant and UTY spoilers below the cut.

I should start off by saying that Starlo and Chujin are similar, in a way. Both of them are nerds, although for different things. Both are said to be caring. Both dedicated their lives to their work. Both wanted to help monsterkind. Both loved Ceroba. Both had secrets.

These similarities have not gone unnoticed, I’ve found— both by the fandom and the devs of UTY.

(Transcript:

Sword: “It does make sense that, like, Chujin and Starlo are kinda similar, and Ceroba, yknow…. She has a type, I guess.”)

So it’s not a secret these two are similar, and it’s probably intentional to make them parallel each other.

But from there, we get to the meat of this post:

These sprites.

This is where I dive into a lot of overanalysis— I’m giving that as a warning before I start. My point here though, is that these two sprites feel incredibly similar in a way where I speculate if it was intentional or not.

I’ll play devil’s advocate first, though. I’m an artist. I draw things, mostly characters and creatures. Sometimes you just have two pieces looking similar— not because you intended it that way, but because the blocking and composition was best that way.

For Starlo’s sprite, the answer feels simple. All of Starlo’s talk portraits are front facing, so this one doesn’t have a need to be any different. If it was, it may feel out of place amongst all the other sprites, especially because there isn’t a reason for him to have this sprite in particular face a different direction. He isn’t looking around, and isn’t averting his gaze. He’s being direct. The best way to convey that is with eye contact (or at least, implied eye contact) via a front facing sprite. Additionally, even if Starlo was averting his gaze, with how UT’s talk sprites work, there are better ways to convey that than changing the way his talk sprite faces.

Starlo’s character as himself also contributes to the way this sprite looks. It’s a direct contrast to the loud, boisterous North Star. This is the monster behind the persona— one who’s a lot less confident, one who thinks himself a ghost to the people around him. A “nobody farmer,” in his words. When trying to get this across, art-wise, the way Starlo’s talk sprites look as opposed to North Star’s talk sprites are a perfect fit! It’s in the subtle expressions versus animated expressions. This is even down to how Starlo’s glasses are drawn, not showing his eyes behind them, giving him a much more distant look.

As for Chujin’s sprite, the answer also feels fairly simple. The sprite pictured earlier was for his tapes, where it would make sense for most of his sprites to be front facing. He’s talking to the camera, it’s a video log. Being silhouetted also works here— it makes him more mysterious in a way.

That’s what I have to say if you look at it JUST from an art point. However, we like to be a little silly in this house (my blog), so I’m going to overanalyze the hell out of this.

So. The pose.

I’m probably going insane at this point. I’ve already explained the most likely reason for the poses being similar, and don’t get me wrong, that’s probably the main reason why. But also— note the eyes.

According to the Spriter’s Resource, Chujin’s sprites usually have his eyes visible from behind his goggles.

But.

There are exceptions.

I think the reason for this lies in the same reason we never see Starlo’s eyes behind his glasses after he takes the hat off. I explained this earlier when discussing the artistic reasoning behind these sprites— not seeing Starlo’s eyes makes him appear more distant, which highlights the part of his character that’s much less confident in himself. We go from seeing his eyes (or at least, the shape of them behind his glasses, this is a consistency with UTY sprites I can talk about later) to not at all.

This is what makes Chujin’s sprites so important to me.

We’re meant to like Chujin. At least, before we know the truth. We’re meant to think he was always a kindhearted man, a loving father and husband, and a good mentor. All the good things. It’s only as the game continues that you see the imperfections. By talking to Dina, you see he didn’t like the Wild East due to what it stood for, and you learn of the time he came into the saloon all disheveled, uncharacteristically asking for a drink, only mentioning he thought he “saw a ghost”. You learn in the Steamworks of his research, and how he wasn’t as good at robotics as he was made out to be.

That’s what makes Chujin flawed, though. It’s not necessarily a bad thing, none of these things will make a player dislike him. As said— we’re supposed to like Chujin. An opinion and a mysterious saloon visit isn’t the end of the world. We also grow to learn more and more about him, and he seems just like a kind man with a love for robotics (even if he struggled).

And then we learn of Ceroba’s plan. And we learn of something hidden in the abandoned Ketsukane Estate.

This is the first time in the Pacifist route that we actually SEE Chujin, first in a photo.

Note the eyes.

We see Chujin’s eyes behind his goggles here! Once again— this is likely for the reason mentioned before. We’ve only been told mostly good things about Chujin so far! Here’s a photo of him and his family— how could this kind man be wrapped in anything suspicious?

Which then makes the sudden change in the tapes crucial.

We can no longer see his eyes— he’s grown distant, mysterious. This is the part of Chujin that he kept secret from even Ceroba, up until he was on his deathbed. It’s the part of him that isn’t necessarily the loving husband and father we know him as, but rather, this is the part of him that was a determined researcher on a mission. And therefore, Chujin goes from lively to cold.

I’m sure that last bit doesn’t ring any alarm bells at all.

Hey! Remember how I said Starlo and Chujin are similar in ways? This is where I get into that. I’m applauding you from behind my screen if you’re still reading.

I’m now going to talk about Starlo and Chujin as characters, as well as the parallels between the two sprites that started this analysis. For simplicity, I’ll break these into sections. Funky names for a funky reading experience, so I’m not just word dumping at you.

1) Got a secret, can you keep it?

Soooo. Chujin and Starlo’s secrets.

One of the first things that rings alarm bells for me is the situation in which both of the sprites I’m analyzing pop up in. Context is key. Specifically, both of the sprites are used when we’re learning the truth about each character.

For Starlo, we’re learning about who he really is, the monster behind the persona. He takes his hat off, reveals the monster underneath, and we get his new talk sprite. He’s finally stopping, for a second— taking a moment to break the act he’s been playing for YEARS. And he does it all to show Ceroba he’s still there underneath it all, as well as reveal to Clover who he really is. He’s at his most vulnerable state, revealing how he sees himself as a nobody, and a fraud.

For Chujin, we’re learning part of the truth of who he was, when he’s at his most morally dubious. We learn of his experiments, the ones he worked on and hid from his family until he was about to die— only then did he tell Ceroba. We also learn of his views and opinions, the reasoning behind them, and how he lied about his job at the Steamworks. He couldn’t bring himself to tell Ceroba he was fired, because he didn’t want her to think less of him.

So, the main points of this:

Starlo and Chujin both had their own secrets

Both of their secrets are revealed when these sprites are used

Both secrets reveal more about the characters’ identities

Both want to be seen in a good light

The main difference, I think, other than what the secrets entail themselves, are what they mean for each character.

2) Light and dark symbolism?? In MY overanalysis??? It’s more likely than you think

Chujin and Starlo’s secrets both weigh on them. Starlo doesn’t want to break character— he enjoys being North Star and wants to bring a smile to the faces of monsterkind. Chujin doesn’t want Ceroba to think any lesser of him for his mistakes.

Additionally, the reveal of their secrets marks two different things for their characters. For Starlo, it’s a step forward. For Chujin, it’s spiraling down.

This gets really fun considering these two sprites, and light and dark symbolism (not in the traditional good versus evil way).

Starlo’s in the light. He’s showing himself, he’s maturing. He’s being incredibly vulnerable for probably the first time in a LONG time, and finally breaking the persona. He’s working towards a better goal, accepting both North Star and Starlo as facets of himself, but it starts with taking off the hat. It starts with coming into the light, and letting the shadows fade away.

Chujin is silhouetted in darkness. As said previously, we only ever hear mostly good things about Chujin from those who were around him (barring Starlo, although that’s secondhand information, and by some extent, Dina). Martlet and Ceroba saw the best in him, a mentor and loving husband respectively. But as he rambles off to his tapes, shrouded in shadow and secrecy, we learn of what was happening behind the scenes: he reveals part of who he really was, and how much he hid away from those he loved, all away from the rose colored glasses.

3) “Your opinion is wrong” -Chujin, probably

To just point out more ways Chujin and Starlo parallel yet also contrast one another (which I will mention for the section after this as well): I think it goes without saying that Starlo and Chujin have opposite worldviews when it comes to humans.

Chujin believes the worst in humans, primarily due to the Snowdin Attack. He hates them— The War was when the blade was plunged into monsterkind’s flesh, and the Snowdin Attack was only a twist of the knife.

Starlo admires humans, maybe a bit too much for some monsters. He loves their stories, loves the idea of cowboys and Westerns, so much so he creates the Wild East with his posse.

This is what makes these two different, only strengthening the light/dark contrast. The ideas of hate and admiration fit well into that theme, don’t they?

Stick with me here. I promise this is going somewhere.

4) “Monsterkind’s Hero is a title soaked in blood.”

So, the aforementioned views of humans? This gets really fun when you apply it to the crux of Starlo and Chujin’s missions: to help monsterkind during their time underground.

Both want to be heroes, in a way. They both want to help. Of course, this is in different ways— but the main intention behind it is the same.

Chujin, as said, hates humans. He wants monsters to be brought to justice. After the Snowdin Attack, he decides that if he can’t help through Axis, then he’ll help another way. Thus starts Chujin’s dedication to his experiments, which he makes his work and eventually the rest of his life. All of it for a chance to help monsterkind when the time comes.

Starlo’s dedication to the Wild East is similar, in a way, yet directly contrasts Chujin. His admiration for humans and Westerns goes to the point he wants to provide monsterkind with their own “slice of the Surface.” He wants to see those around him smile— his own way of helping monsterkind when they’re still stuck underground.

My point here is that while they find different ways to accomplish their missions (and you can drag more light/dark symbolism out of this— Chujin hidden away in the shadows of the basement in the Ketsukane Estate versus Starlo out in the spotlight), both have so much dedication to it that it becomes their lives.

Chujin, although having a family he loved and cared for, let his experiments drive him onwards to the point it cost him his life. Starlo willingly gave up who he was to be North Star, letting the Wild East become his life.

5) Yes, and?

I could go on and on about more similarities and differences between Starlo and Chujin, but I feel like I’ve brought up what I need to for now.

Why bring all of this up in the first place, though? What’s the point of going on about these characters’ missions, or their secrets, or all the light and dark symbolism you could hypothetically draw from it?

Let me talk about those sprites again.

I’ve spent ages going on about Starlo and Chujin, and how they parallel, yet contrast each other. They’re foils, in a way. These similarities and differences are what make these two little sprites so interesting to me.

You could say it’s all because that’s what the scene needed at the time, and that statement likely has truth to it. I already talked about how. But the knowledge of the context of the scenes and these two characters is what makes me wonder if it all was done on purpose.

Chujin, shrouded in shadow, revealing a part of him kept secret from even those he loved most. His reasoning for his hatred for humans comes on full display, and he begins to formulate a mission, the same one his life would eventually fall to. If the royals won’t see how much he cares for monsterkind, he’ll show it himself.

Starlo, left in the Swealterstone’s light, revealing a part of him the Wild East knows nothing of. His mission starts to redefine itself, and it’s original intent becomes more clear. He only ever wanted to be someone. He only ever wanted to help. Maybe now, with the hat off, he can learn to make others happy, but not forget himself in the process.

A conclusion:

So. Do I think that these two sprites for Starlo and Chujin were intentionally made to parallel yet also contrast each other?

My answer is a big fat Maybe. I can’t be entirely sure.

Truth is, I’m not a UTY dev. I literally only discovered and got into this game a little over a month ago. I don’t know the true intent behind the spritework, I don’t know the conversations that happened behind the scenes. I am literally just A Guy ranting on the internet about a silly little fangame that I have brainrot over.

But! I do have a finalized game and commentary I can analyze, and knowing that some spritework details were intentional (the way that Chujin’s talk sprites face are made to match Ceroba and Kanako’s), I could see something like this being either intentional or a really fun coincidence. The type of thing the devs can look back on and realize “oh! That’s funny how I accidentally made that parallel. I didn’t mean to do that, but it works.”

I can only hope it was intentional. Chujin and Starlo are both incredibly interesting characters to me, especially in how they can be seen as foils. Something as minor as this I think just shows the love put into this game and these characters. UTY is just a great game overall, in my opinion.

But yeah! That’s my ramble, all because I was doing sprite studies and looking for references in the Spriter’s Resource for art. Hopefully I made at least some sense :)