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lillaydee · 1 day ago

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I'm Right Here Part 12

BFF!Joel Miller / F Reader

Sometimes the person we've been looking for has been right there all along.

@copperhalfcent, @demonsasss, @bergamote-catsandbooks, @peelieblue @liciafonseca @ultra-nina-bella @joelmillerpascal @kirsteng42 @heartpatch @capnjaket @formulafun, @avidreadee123 @missladym1981 @titlee78

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WARNINGS: BFF Joel Miller, Protective Joel (The Last of Us), Joel is Bad at Feelings (The Last of Us), Good Parent Joel (The Last of Us), Angst, Love Triangles, Miscommunication, Past Child Abuse, Alternate Universe - No Cordyceps Outbreak (The Last of Us), Joel Needs a Hug (The Last of Us), Joel is a Clueless Idiot, Jealousy, Minor Character Death, Implied/Referenced/Supposed Sexual Assault, SEXUAL ASSAULT, SELF HARM, Joel has PTSD

SERIES MASTER LIST

Part 11

“Annie,” Joel hugged her, kissing the top of her head. “It was a joke. We were joking around. We didn’t mean it. You don’t need to do anything. I don’t expect you to do anything. I certainly don’t expect you to keep a promise we made as a joke, you silly bean,” he laughed, kissing her temple.

Annie laughed along, hugging her husband back. She decided not to press the issue right now. She knew how stubborn he could be. She also knew he would never, ever agree. Not even if you hold a gun to his head. He was just built that way.

He released her, telling her to go to bed, he’ll finish up. Go, he urged, swatting her skirt lightly with the dishtowel. Annie rolled her eyes and said goodnight. Sarah opened her bedroom door just as Annie got upstairs, peeking out to see her Mom looking straight at her. Annie walked over to her daughter, who quickly got out of her room, closing the door behind her, following her into the master bedroom, watching as her Mom got ready for bed.

“What did he say?”

“He said no, as expected. But he’ll come around. You know he will.”

“Easy for you to say. He’s been putting his foot down a lot more lately. I still couldn’t get him to agree to me having a kitten or a puppy,” Sarah sulked.

“Sarah, you know you’re not winning that one. I’m allergic. You were never gonna win that one,” Annie said, switching the bathroom light off. “You’re gonna sleep here with me?”

“Nah… not tonight. I still got homework to do.”

“Okay. Love you baby.”

“Love you too Mom,” she said, hugging and kissing her mother goodnight, closing the door behind her. “Night Dad! Love you!” she yelled over the banister. “Love you too BabyGirl, night. Don’t stay up too late,” she heard him semi yell back.

Annie smiled listening to her husband and daughter declare their love for each other. She listened a bit more intently, hearing her husband potter about downstairs before hearing the TV being turned on, the small clacking of the remote being tossed onto the coffee table and Joel’s sigh as he kicked his feet up for the night. She sighed contentedly at how much she knew him, how predictable his routine was to her. 15 years. Seemed like it was yesterday that she saw a man struggling to open a packet of chips. And now they had an entire life shared. She switched the light on her nightstand off and laid back, planning the next few weeks in her head.

Her mind betrayed her and wandered back to their conversation. He will never agree. Not that he had a choice in that matter. It’s a done deal, as far as she was concerned. He just needed a little push.

She’ll just have to make sure that when she does keep her promise, he will be ready.

Annie was up before sunrise as usual, going into the kitchen to get ready for the day. Coffee for Joel. Check. Sarah’s lunch. Check. Joel’s lunch. Check. There was not much butter left out so she took another one to soften in time for breakfast. Check.

Wait, should she call you? Ask you over for breakfast?

Your shoulder was still healing. Could you even cook yet? Maybe she should send some over. Just in case. How about lunch? What was on your schedule today?

Wait… what if you found her overbearing? She wanted to be on your good side. She didn’t want to scare you away. So maybe… text you and ask? Or just… leave you be? But it was 6am. She should wait, right? Text you around… maybe 730? What time do you wake up? Joel said you were an early riser, you jog. But surely with your shoulder…

Wait a minute. Was that…? No… it can’t be. What the heck?

“Joel.”

“Hmm.”

“Joel. Wake up.”

“Hmm?”

“Daisy’s out jogging.”

Joel lifted his head, confused as fuck. What?

“Daisy’s out jogging. She just had surgery 4 days ago. And it’s still dark. Can you go get her? Or at least keep her company? I’m worried.”

Joel sat up, looking around for his phone. “It’s 6am,” he groaned.

“I know, but she’s not 100% and I’m worried. Please? I need to get breakfast ready.”

Joel rubbed his face. “You’re sure she was running? She’s injured her shoulder before. She knows not to run so soon after surgery.”

“She zoomed by the house. Please?”

Joel threw his blanket off him, earning him a small cheer and a clap from Annie. “Thank you!” she said, going back to the kitchen. “Ask her to come over for breakfast please, I’m making her some too either way.”

Joel got dressed in a hurry, going outside, asking Annie which way you went. He walked down to the street searching, he couldn’t see you. There was no way in hell he could catch up to you if he were to go on foot, you had always been too fast for him on foot, walking or otherwise, injured or not. But taking his truck seemed excessive.

His traitorous mind went back to the last time you wanted to go on a run after an injury. He had told you that he didn’t love you enough to run alongside you yet. But he might just love you enough to…

Hey… that’s a good idea.

You were walking along the street as fast as you could, your good arm holding the arm in the sling steady. You weren’t running. You weren’t power walking either. You merely walked as fast as you could without hurting your shoulder. You knew you were supposed to be resting, but you couldn’t sleep well, new place and all. The fact that you spent the majority of your time at the hospital sleeping and taking super powerful naps didn’t help either. You had been in bed since Friday. Sleep was hard to come by last night. Your body was aching all over. You finally fell asleep at 2am and woke up around 5am to use the bathroom, tossing and turning since then. You were starting to fall back asleep again but it was already near 6am, so you decided to go for a walk, just so that you wouldn’t fall back asleep and miss your 830am appointment with the cleaners. You needed the walk anyway. At least try for your 10k a day, as farfetched as that may be right now. Your shoulder wasn’t hurting as much, but you were being careful. You needed to heal. Anything so that the work at Esther’s could move quicker and you could get out of here and go back to your life.

It was quiet, despite the distant sounds of traffic and the occasional barking. The sun was starting to peek it’s head, mixed hues of orange, pink and dark blue decorating the sky. You didn’t have your music on, having lost your Air Pods during the accident. You heard a steady squeaking pattern from behind you, turning around to see, ready to gun it should you need to.

Someone was headed towards you on a bicycle. You squinted to see better, your feet rooted to the ground. Whoever it was, they were not adapt at riding the bike, or the bike was too small for them. They rode over to you, wobbling left and right as they got nearer, their features still hidden behind the dim street lights.

It wasn’t until they clumsily stopped next to you, the brakes squealing as the bike groaned to a stop, accompanied by the brash scraping of their feet on the ground as an additional measure of braking that you realized it was Joel, his grumpy face still swollen from sleep, his bedhead like a bird’s nest, a light sheen of sweat all over his face. Your eyes travelled to the rest of him, his ratty shirt, his tattered sweatpants and dad sandals, his entire bear of a figure perched atop a pink bicycle with a white wicker-like basket in front, plastic flowers decorating them, complete with rainbow coloured streamers coming off the handles.

You stared at him for a good ten seconds, not saying anything.

And then you burst into uncontrollable laughter. Body-shaking, chest-heaving, fuck-I-cannot-breathe laughter. You ended up cross-legged on the sidewalk, your eyesight blurry from tears pouring down your cheeks, laughing so hard you couldn’t function. Your shoulder was starting to ache a little from it being shaken with laughter, from your body slouched over, from your dry heaves trying to stop laughing. You couldn’t even steady it with your good hand, it being busy clutching at your stomach which was starting to cramp up.

All the while, Joel sat on the bike, sour puss on his face, arms crossed across his chest, glaring at you as you laughed without inhibition at the sight of him. He shook his head, chewing his inner cheeks, jaws clenched, grumpy eyes staring daggers at you.

You snorted. Uncontrollably so. Over and over.

And just like that, his sour puss disappeared, an uncontrollable huff escaping his nostrils. Not even a second after, his shoulders started shaking, the corners of his lips turning up into a smile, his arms uncrossed as he brought a hand to his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose, trying hard to control himself.

Your snort turned into helpless wheezes as you tried to breathe, your lungs screaming for a break, your body all but collapsed fully onto the sidewalk.

He roared with laughter, bent over the handles of the bicycle, laughing from seeing you laugh. His entire body shook, the bicycle wobbling dangerously under him. He stood up and let go of the bike when it started moving from his shaking body, and he held on to it, crouched on the sidewalk, laughing with you.

By God, he missed seeing and hearing you laugh.

Took the two of you a few minutes, but you finally managed to compose yourselves, ending up sitting cross-legged facing each other on the sidewalk, the occasional laugh escaping your bodies.

“What are you doing here, Joel? On a pink bike, no less. Tell me that’s Sarah’s. Please tell me you don’t secretly have a pink bike that you ride when no one’s looking.”

“It’s Annie’s, I wouldn’t be caught dead on one. Until now that is. And to answer your question, I was all nice and warm in bed, sleeping, like a normal human being. But Annie saw you jogging past the house and made me come after you. She’s worried about your shoulder. And now I am here trying to get your ass back home so I could go back to bed.”

He stood up, offering you a hand to help you up.

“Aww… she’s worried about me? That’s very nice of her.”

“She’s a mother. Of course she is. What the fuck were you thinking anyway? You know you’re supposed to rest your shoulder. You shouldn’t be running.”

“I wasn’t. I walked. I have an early appointment for the house. Was just trying to keep myself awake. You didn’t need to come get me. I’m fine.”

He turned the bike around, got on, and waited.

You stared at him, unmoving.

“Well, get on, some of us have places to be.”

You scoffed, “I am NOT getting on that bike with you. I just had surgery on my shoulder, I am not risking falling over with you at the helm.”

“Hey!”

“Have you seen yourself ride that thing? That bike is too small for you. Seat’s too low. And to think you used to laugh at me for not being able to wheelie!”

He released a deep breath of frustration, getting off, wheeling the bike alongside him instead to walk with you.

“Why the heck would you need a bike to come after me anyway? I’m not that far away from your place. I walked!”

“I told you that I don’t lo…” he started. But he changed his mind and veered. “You walk too fast. How the fuck am I supposed to catch up to you?”

“When was the last time you were on a bike anyway?” you asked, distracted by a porch light turning off. Joel made a mental note to send Mrs Adler some flowers for distracting you enough that you didn’t notice what he almost said.

“I dunno. Pretty sure it was before you went off to college.”

“I thought riding a bike was supposed to be muscle memory. Like sex.”

You wanted to reverse time. Shit. Why the fuck would you say that? To him of all people.

He stopped walking. A small, cheeky smile forming on his lips. He was quiet for a beat, contemplating whether or not to joke about what you said. But instead, he pushed the bike forward and offered for you to ride it instead. See how well your muscle memory worked for you.

Yeah, no. You would rather jump off a cliff than be seen riding a frilly pink bike.

“I have one good hand. I’m not risking another injury to prove a point,” you said, rather indignantly, turning around to walk towards your rented place.

“Stop by mine, Annie made you breakfast.”

You stopped walking.

“What is it?” he asked, clocking the contemplation on your features.

“Joel, can I ask you something?”

“Course. Anything.”

“How much does Annie know about me? About our history, I mean.”

He gave you a soft smile. “Everything.”

“What do you mean everything?”

“Everything. How we met, how I feel about you, what we nearly became, what happened, how we got separated, everything.”

“Felt.”

“What?”

“How you felt about me.”

“That’s what I said.”

The two of you stared at each other for a while. You could’ve sworn he said feel. Oh well, maybe you misheard.

“And she’s okay with me living a few houses over? With you spending time with me? Me being in your house? Making me breakfast?”

“Yeah. Why wouldn’t she be?”

You gave him an uneasy laugh, turning around to start walking again. He followed, one hand on the bike, guiding it along. You shook your head. Men. What do they know?

That, or he did say ‘felt’ after all.

“I don’t know about you, Joel, but most women don’t like it if their husband’s former love interest came back into town, staying a few doors down.”

He smiled. “Annie’s not most women.”

“Is she being extra friendly with me to keep an eye on me? Make sure I don’t try anything with you?”

He got quiet for a second, before asking, “Does she need to keep an eye on you?”

“No,” you spluttered. Fuck. That was too obvious, wasn’t it? “But that’s not the point. I don’t want her thinking she’s got to worry.”

“She’s not. She’s not like that.”

You continued walking. “So how did you two meet, anyway?”

“It’s a long story.”

“I’ve got time.”

“No you don’t,” he said, tilting his chin up to show you that you have turned into his street. “I’ll tell you one day, I promise.”

“Not here for long, Miller. One day could mean years.”

Silence.

“Are you really leaving? The way Olivia talked I thought you were moving back. Or at least stay longer.”

‘Please don’t go,’ he wanted to say. ‘I’ve missed you. I just got you back.’ It was at the tip of his tongue, but he managed to hold it in.

“I can’t do that. I have a life there. My job. Friends. Apartment.”

‘I can’t stay here and watch you be happy with the nicest woman in the world I can’t even imagine hating or being jealous over. I’m not over you. I can’t risk falling back in love with you.’ It was at the tip of your tongue, but you managed to hold it in.

Your phone chimed.

Mike: Good morning. Sleep well?

“Do you mind if I answer real quick?” you asked Joel. He shook his head, his eyes turning away from your screen.

You: Morning. Not really. But have an early appointment. Can’t talk right now. Later?

Mike: Heading out soon. Teacher’s life, you know? Maybe think about whether or not you’d like to go out for dinner with me later? Let me know.

You: Will do.

You pocketed your phone.

“Who was it? Something wrong?”

“Just Mike. Asking if we can have dinner tonight.”

“Michael Parks? Sarah’s teacher?”

You nodded. He got quiet.

“You’ve been seeing him a lot.”

“I’ve met him four times, Joel.”

“In four days.”

“You keeping count?”

Silence again.

“He seems nice,” he said, not looking at you, focusing instead on the streamers on the handle that got tangled in his fingers.

“He’s alright. I don’t really know him that well yet.”

‘Yet. You said yet. You’re planning to know him.’ That was all Joel could think about.

The two of you got to the front of the house you were renting. As you turned to go in, he reminded you of breakfast.

“I don’t know, Joel. I just don’t think it’s a good idea. I really don’t want to give Annie the wrong impression.”

“Daze…”

“Go home Joel. Enjoy your breakfast. I’ve got to get ready for my appointment anyway.”

“What time is your appointment?”

“8.30.”

“Let me drive you. The place is on my way.”

“I can Uber Joel.”

“Daze…”

“Really, Joel, it’s okay. I’ve imposed enough. Go. Thank you for coming to get me. I’ll see you around, okay?”

He looked defeated, but he nodded. “See you,” he said, standing in front of you awkwardly with the bike between the two of you for a few seconds before finally wheeling it off towards his place.

You hadn’t even taken three steps away from your front door when someone knocked. You opened the door to a worried Annie.

“Joel said you were not coming for breakfast? Who’s gonna eat the many, many eggs and strips of bacon I have fried?” she chastised, her hands on her hips.

“Really, I don’t want to…”

“Impose, yeah, yeah. Come on. It’s a free breakfast, Daisy. Not feeding live alligators,” she said, pulling you by your good hand back out. You had no choice but to follow.

“So you were out to exercise? Willingly? Sarah said you were jogging at the park when you saved her. Why would you do that to yourself?” she asked, her hand still on yours, pulling you along, making you laugh.

You turned into her driveway, Joel closing the garage door with a smirk on his face upon seeing you. “I tried to tell you… but you wouldn’t listen…” he said. “How’s it feel to be dragged over like a five year old?”

You stuck out your tongue at him, following Annie obediently into the house. She kept her hand on yours all the way to the kitchen counter, plopping you on a stool. She placed a plate in front of you and asked you to help yourself. Would you like some toast? How do you take your coffee?

“She likes some hot milk with a bit of coffee in it,” Joel said, leaning on the kitchen wall with his arms and legs crossed, a cheeky smile on his face, receiving a death glare from you and a swat to the arm from his wife. She placed his coffee on the counter for him, going to the fridge to get you milk.

“It’s okay, Annie, I don’t need to have the milk…”

She brushed you off with her hand, taking the milk out to the steamer.

“I can do that mys…”

“Oh, hush. You have one good arm, sit there and eat,” she playfully chastised. “Is she always this stubborn?” she asked Joel.

Joel raised his eyebrows, sipping his coffee. He could feel the hatred ooze out of you next to him. He glanced over and gave you a cheeky wink.

Is he being serious right now? Winking at you with his wife standing right there? And of all the seats around the counter he had to sit right next to you? This man had a death wish.

You turned away from him, clearing your throat, nibbling at a bacon.

“You have a very nice kitchen, Annie,” you said, trying not to focus on the man next to you.

“Ah, you have that old friend of yours to thank. He built me this kitchen with his own two hands. Kept updating it as we go along, I’m lucky he’s my husband,” she said, pouring the hot milk into a mug for you before filling the rest with coffee. She looked at Joel, love in her eyes, the man quietly blushing at her compliment. She went over to him and gave him a peck on the cheek, walking past you, brushing your back with her hand, telling you she had to go wake up little miss Sarah for school.

You didn’t know how to feel. That little display of affection between the two of them had you feeling things you didn’t want to feel, asking questions you didn’t want the answers to. The rush of heat you felt in your face as she proudly proclaimed Joel’s act of service to her – was that to compliment him, or to show off to you? Look what I have? Or what a great husband Joel was? And that heat, was it jealousy for a life you once wanted, would’ve given anything to have, or just warmth for the affection they clearly held for each other?

You didn’t know.

“So what’s on your schedule today?” he asked, buttering several toasts at one go, placing two on your plate.

“Uh… the cleaners are coming to see the place, gauge the situation, and if they feel like they can do the job, they can start today or tomorrow.”

“You staying there while they do it?”

“I don’t know yet. Maybe. I’m still on sick leave. Why not? What else am I going to do?”

“If you need help, let me know.”

“Don’t you have work?”

“Perks of being the boss’s son for me, perks of being the boss’s daughter to you.”

“Pfft, I doubt your Dad still thinks of me as a daughter Joel. I haven’t been back in years.”

“You’ll always be family, Daze. You know that,” he softly said, his eyes earnest. “Oh, you’re not making any plans Saturday. Lunch. Mom’s making Italian. And believe me, her focaccia has gotten better with time.”

You nodded, clearly excited to go. The planned Saturday lunch before this was gloriously interrupted by your surgery. And by God you missed that focaccia. And you really like this bread you’re eating.

“Where’d you get this bread? It’s delicious!”

“Annie made them.”

Okay. You hate her. You hate her, you hate her, you hate her.

Damn it woman! Give other women a freaking chance!

“Okay, is she like… real?”

“What?”

“Your wife. Is she real? Like a real person? Or is she secretly a Stepford Wife? Go on, tell me. I won’t tell anyone.”

He laughed. Bellowed, in fact.

Okay, you hate him too. Hate him for laughing at you, hate his wife for being so freakin’ perfect, hate yourself for not being able to stop eating…

“What is so funny?” Annie asked, coming back into the kitchen, an interested smile on her face.

You pointed at her with the final bite of your toast, hatred in your eyes. “You… I hate you… so much.”

Joel moved your hand away from your plate, still laughing, placing two more slices of buttered toasts on them. “She loves your sourdough,” he said between laughter.

Once more, she brushed you off with her hand, opening the bread can and taking out a huge uncut sourdough, wrapping it in baking paper, placing it in front of you. “Oh, it’s easy to make, once you’ve gotten the hang of it. I’ll give you the recipe. I’ll come over and teach you!” she suddenly got excited, “And I’ll teach you how to make the butter too. It’s Anita’s recipe, but I added some things to it. It’s not so hard anymore, you know? You could use a mixer!”

You dropped the third slice of buttered toast you were shovelling in your mouth, your face going stoic. “What next? Do you have a farm out back I don’t know about? Slaughter your own pigs? Cure your own bacon? What?”

Joel was howling, far too gleeful at your misery. Annie was staring at her husband in disbelief, her lips curving into a huge grin, starting to laugh herself. Sarah joined the three of you in the kitchen, giving you a small hello hug, placing her bag on one of the stools, taking a seat, staring at her Dad, the same expression Annie had on her face.

Okay, too much, he needed to be put in his place.

“Oh my God!” you shrieked.

Joel’s laughter stopped abruptly, checking you for injuries, for some reason. “What’s wrong? You shoulder?” Annie and Sarah’s happy faces disappeared, looking at you with concern.

“I completely forgot!” you dramatically declared.

“What?” Joel was starting to panic.

“I should’ve taken a picture of you on your pink frilly bike!” you stared at him, looking vindictive. Laugh at me? We’ll see about that!

His ‘Uh-oh’ face came on. Eyes wide, mouth open, shoulders stiff, looking at the two women in his life, hoping to God they hadn’t heard you.

“You rode my bike? You told me you just wheeled it along for her!” Annie gasped, hands on her mouth.

Sarah looked as if magic had happened somewhere in the house. “You never rode it even when I begged! Dad!” she exclaimed, so excited at the idea of her stoic, grumpy Dad riding her Mom’s frilly, girly bike.

“Oh yeah, rainbow streamers and all!” you said, looking smug, raising an eyebrow at him. Who’s laughing now, Miller?

His eyes found yours. “You bi… B word!”

It was your turn to howl, joined by his wife and daughter, both asking you to describe the image you had seen.

“Oh, I would’ve paid any amount of money to see that!” Annie cried, wiping tears off her eyes. Sarah was practically bent double on her stool, nearly falling off. Joel immediately steadying her with his hands.

Joel shook his head, unable to help from smiling, even laughing a little at the image you must’ve seen. “Great. Gang up on me. Wonderful. Perfect. Just perfect,” he said, plating Sarah’s breakfast for her.

“Awww… are we sulking, Joel Miller?” you teased.

“Shut up and eat your breakfast,” he sorta snapped, still smiling. Annie and Sarah looked at each other, and then at you and Joel, happiness clearly written all over their faces.

“Sarah sweetie, eat your breakfast, your bus is coming soon,” Annie coaxed, seeing how enraptured Sarah was at seeing his Dad being so smiley.

“Oh I forgot my sweater.”

“Eat, I’ll get it,” she said, going upstairs. She came back downstairs with a purple sweater, sniffing at it, checking to see if it was still wearable.

Immediately, she began sneezing uncontrollably. Sarah got up and snatched the sweater away from her Mom. “Sorry,” she said, “I was playing with Lily’s dog yesterday.”

Annie took some tablets, her eyes watering. “Put that straight in the laundry after school today,” she said, Sarah nodding. She got up to place her empty plate in the sink. Joel went to check on Annie, looking concerned. You wanted to ask if there was anything you could do, but Sarah’s bag distracted you.

It was moving on its own volition.

Sarah noticed you staring, quickly picking up the bag, making a racket with the scraping of the stool and the clearing of her throat, the overly loud declaration that she had to leave, school bus was almost there, hugging her Mom and Dad goodbye, coming by you for a quick hug as well, “See you Auntie Daze,” she cooed, running out the door. Annie followed her, while Joel started clearing the table off plates and mugs, warning you to sit down when you tried to help.

When Annie came back in, she had the most puzzled look on her face. “Was it my imagination or was she in a hurry to go to school?”

Joel shrugged. “First time for everything. I gave up on trying to understand that girl a long time ago,” he said.

“Well,” you said, getting up, “I should get going, I need to be at Esther’s at 830.”

“Joel can take you, right Joel?” Annie said. Joel nodded, looking at you with ‘I told you so’ eyebrows.

“Oh, no, that’s okay,” you said, “I’ll Uber.”

“Nonsense. Joel’ will pick you up in 30. Go, and I will text you about the sourdough,” Annie said, shoving the packed sourdough on your sling, following you to the door.

God, can you ever say no to this woman?

You stood outside Esther’s house, quenching your thirst with some water Annie had sent you, along with what was left of the sandwich she brought with her. You had to shoo her to get her to leave, the woman rolling her sleeves up, insisting to help with the clean-up. It was almost 4, and your spine felt like it had severed in quite a few places.

You and the cleaning crew had been working since 10, and you hadn’t even cleared the front room. You didn’t even want to sift through anything, although the cleaning crew did suggest you did, the lawyer too. But the situation was so bad that papers were practically glued together from whatever questionable liquid that dripped on them from whatever sat on top of them for God knows how long that you just didn’t want to deal with it all. By lunch time, the skip was already full, and they had to tow it away to empty it. Everyone agreed that shovels would be involved from the next day on.

You were done for, your body aching in ways you didn’t know it could. Heck, you didn’t even feel like this after the almost-accident, and yet, all you did was take the trash out – the lighter ones at that. It wasn’t as if you had two good hands.

Your phone rang, your lips curving into a smile to see it was Mike.

“Hey,” you greeted, sitting down on the plastic chair the crew had placed for you.

“Hey yourself,” he said, his handsome face smiling. “You at your Aunt’s?”

“Yeah, leaving soon though.”

“So, any thoughts on my dinner invite?”

You pretended to scrunch your face up in contemplation, him putting on his best pouty, please-say-yes look while you did.

“Nothing over the top, I promise. Simple Taco Truck date.”

“It’s a date, huh?”

“Is that a problem?”

Just then, a loud siren went off, alarm from one of the surrounding houses. You were about to apologize to him for the noise when you noticed you heard the noise in your phone too. His expression changed. “Where is your aunt’s place exactly?”

You told him. He laughed, and you could see him stand up and move about, leaving his house and walking outside. Not two minutes later his head popped up from around the bushes, smiling widely at you, telling you he’ll call you back. He was still dressed in his work clothes, looking rather delicious, if you had to be honest.

“Hello,” he said, hands in his dress pants, bending down to give you a kiss on the cheek. “This is your aunt’s house?”

You nodded, “You live here? Big house for one person,” you quipped. The houses in the area were massive, 5 bedrooms at least.

“I’m renting a room, not the whole house,” he said, sitting down next to you. “It’s the smallest place on the street, to be fair. Right at the end of the street.”

He was about to ask you about dinner when someone started shouting at the crew out front, telling them they were trespassing. You went out to see, Mike following closely behind.

“Everything okay?” you asked, looking at the older man who was red in the face by then.

“Carl?” Mike asked, the man’s angry face relaxing upon seeing him.

“Oh, Mike. You know these people? They shouldn’t be here. It’s private property.”

“Yes, it is, mine,” you said, “I inherited the house.”

“You’re Esther’s niece?”

“I am.”

“Oh, thank God. I thought someone was breaking in. Heard the alarm, you know? Can’t be too careful. Carl Johnston. I live two houses down. I work with Mike here.”

“Except, I’m the temp art teacher and he’s the headmaster,” Mike said. Carl laughed.

“Well, okay, I’ve gotta go, but I’ll see you around?” Carl said, eyeing the crew coming out with more garbage. “It’s really bad in there, huh? We were shocked to hear how bad the place had gotten, let me tell you that. Esther didn’t open the door much these last few years. Just… let me know if you need any help,” he said, giving you a small smile before leaving.

“Are you gonna be here every day?” Mike asked you, pulling you to sit back down, “Cause I don’t think you should be lifting things,” he said, pointing at your shoulder.

“Nah, I’m just observing. Being available.”

He nodded, “So… I can come here every day after work to keep you company?”

“You want to be this close to that stink?”

He laughed, “If it means I can spend more time with you. And maybe have dinner with you after? I didn’t get your answer. Dinner? Tonight?”

“You know I’m only here for a few weeks, right? I just don’t know if it’s a good idea to be going on dates if I’m leaving.”

He dropped his head, nodding slowly. “I know. I just… I want to get to know you. I won’t pressure you, I like you. A lot. It’s just dinner. And if it goes well… we have another one.”

You took a deep breath, “And if they keep going well? What then?”

“We’ll cross that bridge when we come to it,” he gently said after some contemplation. “Please? Dinner?”

Oh what the hell.

“Okay,” you shyly said, nodding.

His smile was so wide he looked as if he could be floating. “Okay, pick you up 6.30?”

You nodded. He stood up, helping you up as well. You walked him out to the street, the man still smiling uncontrollably. He took a step closer to you, taking your good hand in his and thanked you for agreeing to go out on a date with him. He bent down and gave you a lingering kiss, just off the corner of your lips, taking his time before standing straight again. It was so intimate, so deliberate that you could feel warmth pooling under your cheeks.

The sound of a truck door closing broke your trance. Joel was walking towards you, asking you if you were ready to leave. Mike offered his hand to shake, telling Joel it was nice to meet him again. You told Joel you were just going to lock up, leaving the two of them to talk.

When you came back, the bag Annie had brought your lunch in in your hand, the two was talking about Sarah’s art project, Joel looking as if he was having the most uncomfortable conversation of his life. He took the bag from you, shaking Mike’s hand once more, telling you he would be waiting in the truck. Mike turned towards you, whispering that he would see you soon.

“Can’t wait,” you whispered back, raising yourself a little, giving his clean shaven corner of the lips a kiss.

Joel watched as you said goodbye to this man, Sarah’s very good looking teacher, the one who just told him the two of you were going out on a date tonight, not realizing how hard he was gripping the steering wheel. He only let go when he realized how painful his jaws were from clenching his teeth, only then realizing how tense he was.

You climbed into the passenger seat, Joel helping you with your seatbelt.

“I hear you’re going out on a date tonight,” he said before he could stop himself.

“Yeah…” you said, looking at him. “Is that okay?” you heard yourself ask.

“What? No, of course it’s okay. Good for you. He seems like a good man, Sarah loves him.”

‘He won’t accuse you of trying to take advantage of him, or push you out, or chase you out of the country like I did,’ he thought. ‘And unlike me, he asked you out after 5 days, not 20 plus years. He’s a better man than me, Daisy. And he’s single. He’s not married, unlike me.’ he said in his head, his thumb unconsciously playing with his wedding band.

“Yeah, he seems like one.”

Joel nodded, putting his truck into gear, trying to hide the devastation in his eyes from you.

Sarah was waiting for you in front of your rented place when you got there, still with her back pack. Joel wound his window down, asking her what she was doing there.

“I have Maths homework, and I need Auntie Daze’s help – Grandma said she’s good at Maths. Do you mind Auntie Daze? It’s just two questions,” she pleaded.

“Of course not,” you said, “Come in. I’ll walk her home after,” you told Joel.

“Don’t be too long, she’s got things to do,” Joel warned. Sarah shouted an okay and followed you inside.

She didn’t move from the door as you got rid of your purse and water bottle, waiting for her Dad to leave. She waited until his truck parked before coming inside to where you were in the kitchen, bent over the fridge asking her if she wanted a soda or juice.

“Auntie Daze, are you allergic to anything?”

You closed the fridge, a bit taken aback by her question. “No, why?”

A mewl sounded. And then a rustle. Coming from her pack.

“Sarah?” you asked. The teenager had gone all wide-eyed and innocent looking.

“Sarah, why is your bag meowing?”

“Please don’t be angry,” she pleaded.

You scrunched your eyebrows, really confused.

“Look, I know you don’t know me, and you don’t owe me anything, if anything I owe you my life, but I’ve heard all about you and I’ve always thought of you as a cool aunt, you know? Second to Auntie Ollie, that is, she’s the best. Do you know she used to model part time?” Sarah nervously rambled, not really looking you in the eye.

“Sarah…”

“Okay, okay,” she said, looking defeated. “I need a favour okay? Just until I could figure something else out.”

“A favour that is not Maths?”

She shook her head. She took a deep breath and placed her backpack on the kitchen counter, opened it, and produced a ruffled-looking ginger kitten.

“Is that?”

“The kitten you rescued, yes,” she nodded, her eyes wide, so like Joel’s you were considering avoiding them out of fear for entrapment into doing something you didn’t want to do.

“Sarah…”

“I just need you to keep her for a while, I’m looking for people to adopt her, I promise. I kept her in my room but you saw what happened this morning, my Mom’s allergic. Please Auntie Daze. I asked Auntie Ollie but she and Uncle Will sometimes work until late at night and they can’t take her to their work place and I don’t want her to be all alone. She’s really well behaved, you can take her to the house with you. Auntie Ollie will bring the things you need after work. Please…” she was practically on her knees, the kitten held high like Simba.

Awww shucks.

“I have a date tonight, Sarah, she’ll be alone tonight.”

Sarah’s face fell, “You have a date? But I thought…” she started to say but caught herself and promised you that Olivia could take the kitten until you came back. Pleeeease?

“Fine,” you surrendered, taking the wriggling kitten from her. You held her close to your chest, scratching behind her ears with your finger. She started purring louder than a motorboat. You laughed.

“She likes you,” Sarah said, smiling wide.

“Okay, I already agreed to take her. No need to sell me on the plan anymore. What’s her name?”

“Ellie.”

Part 13

#joel miller fanfiction #joel miller #joel miller x reader #the last of us fanfiction #joel miller x you #tlou fanfiction #BFF!Joel Miller

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randomfoggytiger · 2 days ago

Note

do you have any gossamer specific fanfic recs?

Collector's Edition: A Gust of Gossamers

I do, indeed! :DDD

Decided to pick authors who have crossover with each other, be it collaborations or dedicated mentions.

**Note**: There will be typos-- will edit them out later.

Loose chronological order below~

msk's

Home by Another Way

Neither of his parents had offered to come, so she'd stayed in North Carolina though it meant a run in with Blevens.

"You should have been with your family. Not hanging around my hospital room."

Truth be told, part of her hadn't wanted to come home and face the sadness.

Post Beyond the Sea Mulder and Scully bond over their fathers.

Final Arrangements

He'd insisted on bringing her home from the hospital, even though her mother had offered. Scully had sensed that it was important to him and had suggested her mother spend some time with Bill before he had to return to California.

Post Redux II Mulder finds Scully's pre-Gethsemane funeral plans.

The Brixton Witch by Kel & msk

She paused for a moment, one hand on the car door and waited for the lightheadedness to fade. Her hesitation wasn't lost on Mulder, who shot a concerned glance in her direction....

It wasn't as if she could order her body to hustle that cellular repair because she was tired of feeling cold all the time. If it wasn't for her silk-blend long underwear, she'd be shivering in the late October breeze.

She firmly shut the car door, and strode toward the shop. Mulder overtook her, reaching around to push the door open.

Post Redux II Scully and Mulder investigate a haunted bakery.

And So It Goes

I sat up, heart pounding, gasping for breath as Mulder stumbled into the room. His hair was sticking up in the back like a rooster's comb, and if I wasn't having a breakdown, I would have laughed. "A bad one?" he asked.

"I give it a nine." I ran a shaky hand through my hair as Mulder brought me a glass of water from the bathroom.

"Yeah, but I bet you can't dance to it," he quipped as he handed me the glass and sat next to me on the bed. I took a long drink and wondered why people bring you water when you're upset. He rubbed my back as I took deep breaths and felt my heart try to escape my chest. "Which one was it? The one on the examining table?"

I bitterly regretted telling him about that particular horror show.

Post One Son Scully and Mulder investigate another abductee case.

Jabberwocky by bcfan & MaybeAmanda & Amy & Tesla & msk & Marchmont, Lucy & Kmom

Mulder's eyes moved from Sybil to Scully. "Fro--Melvin said you had information. What's up?" he asked, the lack of expression in his voice expressing the utmost suspicion.

Sybil leaned forward, and the lazy drawl was nearly gone from her voice. "I think the company I work for is running insurance scams with the undead."

Post Bad Blood Scully and Mulder find themselves-- courtesy of the Lone Gunmen-- investigating another suspicious Texan town.

Mezzo Luna

"I think Carmela's emotions were carried through the food she cooked to the people who ate it. She was angry when she made the ravioli, and the people who ate it became enraged." He sat back and folded his arms, as if daring her to take her best shot.

Scully took a sip of her club soda and fought a smile.

Mulder and Scully investigate a town embroiled with heightened emotions (and confront a few of their own.)

"The Freedom Squad Birthday by Kel & msk

"He wants a Freedom Squad Battle Fortress."

"I'm sure he'll like that mitt just fine."

Mulder was grinding the ball into the glove, forming the pocket. Which really wasn't necessary, but still, that's what a guy does with a new glove.

"I went to World O' Toys and Big Box Toys in Alexandria. I called a couple of stores in Arlington. I didn't get very far."

"He didn't give you much notice," Doggett said. As in, maybe if you talked to him more than once a month, you would have known earlier.

AU-- Post Existence Mulder is unstable, flaky, and constantly in and out of Scully and William's life.

mimic117's

Supermarket Sweep

Why don't they include this in the training? Especially for guys. It's gonna come up at some point. It's inevitable. You get comfortable with each other. You trust each other. You'd even die for each other. So why shouldn't you do this one little thing, too? Easy, right?

Wrong.

There's too many choices.

S1 Mulder is sent on a period shopping expedition.

One Another's Best

"I miss her, Mulder."

He places his hand on her sleeve.

"I know."

Post Paper Clip Mulder understands why Scully is snappy at work.

War Stories

How do you burn a ring inside a shirt cuff? He just smirked when I asked about that one.

He does that a lot. Never really explains anything, just shrugs or smirks.

Post Bad Blood Mulder's dry cleaner is used to regular damage.

Imperfect Penance

It's a dangerous assignment, I won't kid you about that. I knew what I was getting into from the start, although I wasn't happy about going in without backup. Still, Skinner was right. I couldn't risk the operation just because I feel naked without her next to me. But she found out anyway. Wish I could have seen her worming the details out of Skinner.

Pine Bluff Variant Mulder is glad to have Scully on the "in."

Getting By

It took a moment to achieve upright and stable, but once she did, Scully found she could shuffle with the best of the octogenarians. She'd made it around the bed, on a steady course to reach the door in under twenty minutes, when she remembered two things. One, there was someone in her apartment. Chances were really good that it was just her mother, who'd called the previous night and used her maternal radar to deduce her child's state of health. But two, she couldn't be sure of that and her gun was safely locked away in her end table. She turned and looked. Way back there. On the other side of the bed.

She swiveled slowly toward the door again and caught sight of the baseball bat standing in the corner.

S6 (or S7) Scully is very sick... and very loopy.

Jersey-deviled

"So *anyway*.... I'd just gotten close to the door when it opened again. The woman standing there yelled, 'Hey! Come on in!' and hauled me into the room."

"Did you get her description?"

"I already told you I didn't. It happened too fast, and once I was inside the room, I was mobbed."

"Right. I forgot."

Mulder and Scully, on the road with concussion stories.

Jaded

"Well, you're not upsetting me, Miss, uh..."

Ms. Cool Cucumber doesn't like it when Hotshot has to remind her of my *real* last name. Wish I could see the look she gave him. She's the one in control here and she seems to think I'm hiding something.

First Person Shooter's Jade Afterglow has thoughts after Scully and Mulder's interrogation.

Coming up Roses

"Look on the bright side, Mulder."

"Is there a bright side?"

"Of course there is. This time you weren't hurt enough to need drugs, so I won't have to listen to your snoring at night."

"Sez you. And I do not snore."

"Yes you do."

"No I don't."

Mulder is scratched up by rose bushes.

Chip Off the Old Block, Chip Off The Old Block 02 - Serendipity, Chip Off The Old Block 03 - Veracity, and Chip Off The Old Block 04 - Duplicity

Trading glances with Mulder, Charlie took on the task of deflecting his sister's annoyance. "We were almost mugged coming out of the gym, Sis. No big deal. We just didn't want to worry you."

"Yeah." Mulder dove through the loophole he'd been handed. "It was just some hop-head trying to score a little cash. We got the bad guy, the cops took him away, and we're both fine. End of story."

Glaring from one man to the other, Scully crossed her arms and lowered her brows. "Why do I get the feeling there's something else you're not telling me?"

AU-- Post Existence Mulder, Scully, and William are awash in Charlie Scully misadventures. (Turns out, William's little powers are genetic.)

Emily Sim's

Aeviternal

He closed the door and scooped up his jacket and a sweater he'd left on the couch. They joined other discarded parts of his wardrobe on his bed. Good to know the bed was good for something.

Post Fire Mulder ruminates on the word 'love'.

Softly

I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you. It thrums through his body with every beat of his heart, with every step that he takes towards her hospital room. How many times over the years has he done this? He’s only been gone a few minutes to grab some food for himself, but he can’t shake eight years’ worth of hospital visit paranoia from his shoulders.

Existence Mulder keeps watch over Scully and their son in the hospital.

Satchie's

Dancing with Mephistopheles

"You've sustained an injury to your left anterior cerebral artery, which has caused some hemorrhaging into your brain. That's why you're having speech difficulties and the weakness on your right side. We're going to repair the damaged artery and evacuate the clot."

Brain surgery? You've really outdone yourself this time, Mulder.

Post Demons Mulder realizes that it was Scully's blood, not her tears, on his shirt.

Renaissance de Mal

Scully glanced back at the abandoned vehicle. "Don't move. I'll bring the car over here and get you situated. Then we'll go to the emergency room."

Mulder gingerly flexed his limb. "Nah. I think it's okay. I just need to work out the kinks. Probably twisted it funny or something."

"Uh huh. It's the 'or something' that worries me.

S5 Mulder adds another injury to his list while chasing after a demon dog.

Claimed

Scully frequently volunteered to handle this unpleasant task, but his misplaced guilt prevented him from accepting her gracious offer this time. For crying out loud, he nearly died simply because he went to an out-of-town basketball game. It was so senseless and humiliating. No, he would fight this battle alone.

Mulder's insurance company has no mercy.

In Extremis

The worst part of my decline is having to face my trials alone. So many times I've debated whether or not to tell Scully about my illness, but I can't seem to arrive at a decision. For crying out loud, she's a doctor. Sooner or later she's bound to notice the subtle clues of my deterioration. Do I honestly believe I can keep this from her until the bitter end? No matter how I check out, she's going to be heartbroken.

AU-- Pre-Requiem Mulder is too afraid to tell Scully about his brain disease.

Jenna's

IOU

We spend the next few hours reliving the past 22 years through my eyes. I tell her everything, but mostly about my time spent with Scully and all that has happened to us over the last two years. She finally has gained the nerve to ask "the" question.

"This Scully, is she is a "partner?" Or is she is a "partner, partner?"

AU-- Mulder and Samantha root around in their parent's attic.

Amy's

Where are You, China Blue?

"Listen to me."

He looked off, annoyed.

"You're not listening."

"Yes, I am."

"Then stop it, Daddy. Just hear me out. I don't care anymore. I don't care. It used to be fun. It used to be this great game. 'Don't get caught, Sammy', you'd say. It was great. My whole life was great. Until last week, I thought it was going to be that way forever."

AU-- Post Redux II Samantha is sick and tired of the games.

Through the Mist

You approach my body. I expect to find shock, horror and sadness etched within every line of the face I know better than my own. Instead you are smiling, you approach me as you have every other day of our friendship, your eyes take in my body with reverence, a small smile is dancing on your lips. Your arms are held behind your back and as you approach the bed I can see the little game you have intended to play. A date. The remembrance of the word is almost unbearable. Your smile grows as you present my corporeal self with the bouquet from behind your back. I can hear you lightly mocking me, laughing at the fact that I had said that fortunes would come between us and normality. You are out to prove me wrong, not out of vengeance or spite, but because that is how you and I grow and move forward.

AU-- Scully's spirit watches a broken Mulder take her body home.

Tesla's (Site)

Get Up, Mulder

He rolled onto his side. He still had his gun. What was the problem? He felt blood trickling from his scalp. Someone must have sapped him. He was such an idiot. He wiggled his fingers, tried to send a message to his feet. They moved. Good. Houston, we have movement.

"Scully?" he said, tentatively. He was in a parking deck. Something about a suspicious sale of fertilizer. Great. Wonderful. He knew Kersh wanted to kill him, but he had thought it would be death by boredom.

FTF and S6 Mulder's many "passing out" adventures.

After the Ship

"When a man has to start all over again----when a profiler, who sees evil everywhere, has to start over again- ---how do you rejoin the world?"

Black's eyebrows twitched once. "Ah," he said. "But I have a connection to the world. I have my daughter."

Mulder grimaced.

Black reached in his pocket for a couple of dollars. "Yes, Agent Mulder, I'm luckier than you. You have to find your way back without a lifeline."

Post Three Words Mulder remains disconnected, dully wondering if he's a clone.

Kel's No Longer at Ease Here

He looked over at me, nodded, and turned back to look out the window.

"If that's true, you have my deepest sympathy," he said.

If that's true. Like I'm a liar.

"Squamash, Pennsylvania. Sound familiar?" I asked him.

That got his attention.

Vienen Doggett tells Mulder about his own experience with death.

Kmom's How I Want The X-Files To End

"Scully? You awake?"

"Sure, Mulder, I'm awake." The voice is deadpan. "I'm always awake at... uh... 3:35 am."

"Well, I was wondering... "

"What else is new? Make it quick."

"Do you think it's possible for dinosaurs to still be walking the earth somewhere?"

Post Existence Mulder and Scully have an early morning conversation about reinstatement.

bcfan's

Party Line

At Mulder's hurt look, Scully swallowed and closed her eyes. Get a grip, she scolded herself. You usually love his brilliance and energy. Thinking back to yesterday's discussion - childhood report card comments - Scully remembered she'd shared "plays well with others." Mulder had countered with "has a low tolerance for repetition."

That's the key, Scully decided. I have to find a way to pull us both out of this miasma of snarkiness. I have to give Mulder something new and different to think about.

Post Firewalker quarantine slumber party.

Wired

"I'm enlisting your help on a field assignment, but it's going to be undercover. Can you get away unofficially for a few days?"

"Well, I have some back vacation time coming. Agent Scully, might I ask-"

"No. I'm on an unsecured line. Drop off whatever paperwork you need to fill out and meet me in your own car - not a Bureau car, Agent Pendrell - at the food court of the Key Mall in Frederick. It's about 40 miles from D.C. Do you know where it is?"

"I'm sure I can find it. I'll be there as soon as I can."

Scully nodded. She still had one friend in the FBI.

Wetwired Scully is on the run, calling up Pendrell for help and fleeing to her mother's.

Bon Voyage with an Open Book

"No, I'm thinking about early humans. It must have been confusing for the first people to dream - to go somewhere without going."

"I never thought of that before."

Mulder throws his arm over his eyes and murmurs. "I don't want to go somewhere anymore, Scully. It's too hard."

"Mulder, I'm coming over."

Post Paper Hearts Scully drops by with a present.

Hanukkah

Scully spotted it on a dusty shelf at a gas station QuikiMart, propped next to boxes of tinsel and faded red and green ornaments. A quick decision later, the miniature menorah was tucked into her plastic bag with sunflower seeds and a lottery ticket promising 38 million dollars.

Mulder looked surprised as he examined her offering.

"For good luck," she murmured.

Post Kaddish Scully buys Mulder a menorah.

Twin Paradox, A New Interpretation

"Perfect timing, Mulder. No haircut, but I just got rid of three days worth of beard. How are you feeling?" Scully again held the water to Mulder's lips as she spoke.

"Better," he quietly replied, then gestured weakly with his hand. "Roses?"

"From my mother. Don't worry, she signed my middle name on the card. I knew they were for you, though."

Mulder smiled, and Scully's heart turned over.

"I've been dreaming. Good dreams. You're in them, Scully."

Amor Fati Mulder recovers in an old folks' home.

The Breakfast Club

"I'm cooking this morning, Mulder. Do you have a toaster?"

"Of course. This place has all the accoutrements of civilized dining."

Scully stepped into the kitchen. "Where is it?"

Mulder squeezed around her and crouched low, fishing with long arms in the back of a bottom cabinet. "Ta da." He held up an avocado clunker from the 1970s, covered in grime.

Post Amor Fati Scully keeps Mulder well-fed during his recovery; and he begins to return the favor.

Pine-scented

The funny little Charlie Brown Christmas tree looked almost lovely if he squinted and turned his head sideways. Lights sparkled in the windows and soft music caressed the room. It was beginning to look a lot like happiness realized.

Will climbed on Mulder's lap as he sat cross-legged on the floor, taping wires to the branches so the baby couldn't pull on them. Will drooled on his shirt and grabbed his nose. "Gah."

Post Existence Christmas, with poop and romance.

Obfusc8er's

Mandates from Heaven by Obfusc8er & Xtreme Unction

Mulder leaned against one of the columns, casually crossing one ankle over the other, and squinted. He was trying to make out the textual message in the shimmering, as he is wont to do every time he visits the Lincoln Memorial. As usual, the epistle hidden in the water eluded him. He and Samantha used to play this game as children, making up imaginary Pentateuchal directives during every visit to the national mall. He smiled at the memory of some of the more ridiculous mandates from heaven they pretended to see.

AU-- Pre-S1 Mulder sees a "happily ever after" doppelganger.

Spending Time

I close my eyes briefly, trying to blink away the encroaching fog. I bite my lip until it bleeds. Even as I fade, I want her badly. She winds her hands together and shoves rhymically on my chest in a futile attempt at resuscitation. How lucky I am that my doctor is the pathologist who never says die.

Post Dod Kalm Mulder and Scully swap music requests after a night of nightmares.

True Reflections

Over here! Don't forget me! Mulder shouts silently.

"Okay. If I'm leaving anything behind, I'll just come by tomorrow to pick it up. I'll leave you alone now." She turns to leave.

He cannot take seeing her walk away right now, and he swallows hard.

"I don't want to be alone."

Post Grotesque Scully stands by her shaken partner.

Russian Roulette by Obfusc8er & bcfan

The next time he awakens, Mulder bites his lip hard to keep silent, but he can't prevent the shakes.

Terma Mulder's stint in the Russian gulog.

Kiss and Makeup

"I got here as soon as I could. You sounded...lonely."

He lowered his eyes before saying the last word, unable to meet her gaze. She nodded at him, noting that he was no longer making an effort to pretend that his visit was anything but personal. She backed away a couple of steps, leaving the door wide open. He stepped inside and closed the door behind him. He stood fidgeting with the cuff of his trench coat, waiting for a cue, for a hint of what she needed from him. He was willing to do anything for her.

She wanted to let him hold her, but a lump was growing in her throat. She was busy trying desperately not to cry in front of him.

Pre-Gethsemane Scully and Mulder have a frank conversation about her health.

Reverto Ad Noctum

I can smell your fear.

Detour-- the Mothman's perspectives.

Convergence

Everything is running smoothly, and it all results in a living being, itself interacting with other beings in much the same way the wandering atoms within it do. The organism moves, communicates with, and manipulates members of its own and other kinds to become a part of an always-jostling, writhing whole conglomeration clinging precariously to a tilted, rolling rock. The system is humming along nicely, taking care of itself quite well.

And then something goes terribly wrong. The steady fluid pressure inside the organism's network of blood vessels rises slightly, the heart pumping frantically. The adrenal glands release endocrine and adrenaline into the bloodstream, causing the blood to become a much more efficient oxygen carrier. The protein hasn't made it back to the lungs yet. The combination of speeding heartbeat and frantically pumping lungs makes the entire system shake and vibrate with anticipation.

Monday, and one of the many days Scully lived through.

Deus ex Machina

Her partner was staring at the low tree stump upon which Legere had been splitting wood. She walked toward him, stopping when she saw the subject of his inspection. The face of the stump was sawed off with a smooth surface. The gray weathered grains were stained black and brown in a starburst pattern. Scully leaned closer and squinted. The stain was more recent and thinned around the edges, revealing its true pigment. It was red.

"It's blood," she stated, mostly to herself.

S6 Scully (and Mulder) come face-to-face with a demon on one of Kersh's patrols.

Papercut

"Don't move, Mulder. I'm not yelling. You have a concussion...among other things."

He winced as he felt fat raindrops falling on him with stinging force. Everything before him was a blur. He waited, and Scully's form slowly took shape.

"How many fingers am I holding up?"

He looked at her, but his thoughts were clouded by pain in his head.

"Yeah. Fingers."

Scully finds her partner after he narrowly escapes a tornado.

One Man's Journey

I sense a wave of trembling pass through her frame as I marvel at the implausibility of our circumstances. Her head rests against my chest, against the very place where someone, or something, split me open and tried to remove my faith in her. When they realized they could not have that, they took everything else?

Post Three Words Mulder is desperate to keep Scully around while (temporarily) helpless to re-situate back to "normal."

Waddles52 and Little Bullit 89's Spectacular Lights and Chili Nights

"The injection should make you sleepy. I'm going to talk to the manager and find out where the closest medical facilities are. You need to be seen by a doctor."

"You're a doctor," he said sleepily. The phenergan was beginning to take effect.

"That's true, but in case you haven't noticed, the vast majority of my patients are dead.

AU-- Mulder and Scully, emergency appendicitis, and an important "I need you."

bellefleur's

Kiss of an Angel's Wings

Every time he closes his eyes, he sees her face. It's been like this for months now, maybe years, but never like tonight. Never like this. The memory of those baby blues riveted to him is seared into his soul.

Post Tempus Fugit Pendrell's last, besotted thoughts.

Iced

After the fact, it was hard for Scully to describe just what had occurred since it all happened so quickly. Ernie had just finished a rousing rendition of "Rubber Ducky," and as the music changed, the other characters emerged from the curtain, one by one, for the final number. Her focus, of course, had been on Big Bird, hoping for his sake that the show could end without incident. But as she watched him glide gracefully along behind Elmo in the long line of figures circling the ice, suddenly he broke formation and made a beeline for Oscar. With a dive at the garbage can, he and the Grouch slid toward the center of the rink, in a mangled pile of feathers and fur.

Post Detour Mulder and Scully are sent on an FBI undercover mission... as Sesame Street characters on ice.

When Cows Fly

Scully froze. She stopped breathing altogether, hoping that complete lack of motion would prevent him from waking further so that she could surreptitiously pull herself away. Slowly resuming her breathing, she began to plot another run at the alarm clock when a nearby rumbling startled her.

"If you wanted to cuddle you could've just asked."

Rain King Scully is flustered by Mulder's oblivious consumption of her space.

42 Flavors

Scully turned at Mulder's voice to see him pull up alongside her, and then she followed him out the door. One of the tables they had passed on the way in was now vacant, so they took their places in the wrought iron chairs flanking the matching round table.

"So, was it a good birthday, Scully?"

"Best one I've had in six months."

Post The Unnatural Mulder whisks Scully away to get gelato.

Combustion

She and her partner had faced this situation too many times, with one possibly losing the other permanently. Had this become almost mundane for them? To someone who had never faced this trauma before, the occasion magnified lost moments and things left unsaid. But for Scully, such thoughts had not even occurred to her, until now. Was it possible that she may never see Mulder again and never have the chance to express how she truly felt about him?

Mulder survives a bomb blast cave-in; and reunites with a relieved Scully, ready to take the next step.

In Heels

You'd think by now I'd be used to getting ditched, but with Mulder, it was never about gender. Sure, he was trying to protect me from taking the same stupid risks he was, but not because he thought I was a liability. That doesn't mean it didn't piss me off, but this--this one was a personal insult. And I don't like being insulted.

Mulder's swollen ankle prevents him from joining Scully and a misogynistic detective on the field.

Mother Love

Scully had invited him to join her and her mom for brunch that Sunday, but he politely declined and explained simply, "There's something I have to do." She accepted his excuse without question, perhaps understanding, or simply respecting his need to open up to her in his own time.

Post Sein und Zeit Mulder visits Tena Mulder's grave for Valentine's Day.

Triple Returns

"The Son."

Scully and Hughes both turned to look at Mulder who had now moved into the living room and was standing over the tape outlining where the body had fallen.

"Pardon me?" Hughes inquired.

"The Son. Daniels was the only son in his family, just like the second victim of each trio before. The original killers saw themselves as an unholy trinity, and they killed along the same pattern."

AU-- S7 Mulder and Kristen Kilar meet again.

Visceral

Your focus turns back to the steel pan containing the most poetic of my earthly remains. You place it inside the frame of the scale then write down the weight. You set my heart on the cutting board and pick up a long knife, your actions practiced and controlled, almost mechanical. The blade presses against the mottled epicardium, expressing thick, clotted blood from the vessels. But you pause, held back by something invisible and unspoken, your masterful hands trembling. Turning, you look at my opened body, my innermost self exposed. A few clear drops run from beneath your mask, dripping onto the front of your gown, mingling there with a smear of red.

Post All Things Daniel Waterston selfishly watches Scully autopsy his dead body.

Then Comes Marriage

"C'mon, Scully, it'll be fun. The lights, the magic. There's no other place like it on earth."

AU-- Mulder and Scully accidentally get married in Vegas.

Arms Wide Open

It hits me again: We did it. We made a life. I can't believe it.

And once more I laugh to myself in disbelief and start crying. This seems to be an automatic response for me.

AU-- Requiem Mulder wasn't abducted; and bolts from room after being told the surprise news.

Easter Vigil

All she knows for sure is that he was dead. She held his lifeless body. She touched his decaying flesh. She stood watch as they sealed him in the casket and then lowered him into the ground.

He was dead. And then he wasn't.

He is risen.

Deadalive Scully thinks of her waxing and waning faith in miracles.

Simple Man

The moment was interrupted as Will emerged from his room and rejoined them. It was Mulder who first noticed him, and Scully followed his gaze. Their son was now wearing jeans, a Yankees shirt, a ballcap, and his baseball mitt--the way he usually dressed when his father took him to the park to play catch.

AU-- Post Existence Mulder and Scully discuss his childhood while William changes his Halloween costume.

Is There a Doctor in the House?

Mulder was standing on his desk, holding something above his head, apparently installing...

"Ceiling tiles? Mulder, what are you doing?"

He almost fell off the desk, startled by her presence, but she quickly reached out to steady him. He smiled sheepishly and climbed off the desk.

AU-- IWTB Mulder keeps putting off his doctorate.

truthwebothknow1's

Natiruvaaq

He tried to cut through the fog that left his mind in a painful vice.

Mulder, caught in the fog.

Echoes

Her aunt had been bugging her for months about coming over to spend a few days and finally meet her.

S6 (or S7) Scully vacations in Ireland, where she not only finds her own X-File but runs into her partner.

Enchanted Shores

The soft crunch of feet through wet sand broke her out of her reverie as her partner approached her, grinning like a little boy bringing her a natural sea treasure.

The man with the child in his eyes.

S6 (or S7) Mulder and Scully take a lovely dovey trip to Maine.

Home Alone

He stood at the lip of the stairs swaying and was feeling quite disorientated when the downstairs phone ringing tore a path through the cotton in his head. His good foot shifted inadvertently onto the first step but his toes could not dig into the carpet enough to stop his forward momentum. A final sway and his crutches slipped from his grasp with a clatter and he pitched forward, too shocked and slacked jawed to cry out. The hall flooring came up to collide with his nose at an alarming speed just as the answering machine kicked in.

Mulder gets into progressively worse scrapes on Valentine's Day, resulting in Maggie's arrival, Scully and Skinner's panic, and a reporter's opportunistic attempt to snap a photo.

My December

And then they found him.

Mainly because the puddle of red stood out in stark contrast to the endless white. Fortunately, they'd spotted his limp body wedged upside-down against a snow-covered rock before the last gimlet slither of light vanished over the next mountain. Only Mulder could render himself trussed up like some macabre raspberry ripple snowball....

AU-- S7 Mulder is wrapped up in barbed wire after a disastrous car accident. With no other recourse, Skinner and Scully prepare to pull it out themselves.

If I Close My Eyes Forever and Vortex

He was so excited at the thought of revisiting his old haunts and he hadn't really come down since. He called it his Oxford beat. Scully had nearly fallen out of the boat, laughing as he said it. They nearly both ended up in the river. Good memories, he was going to need them, they both were.

A sudden slither of melancholy caught her in the ribs. His hand tugging gently at hers brought her out of her reverie.

AU-- Mulder wakes from a dreamworld, nearly debilitated with serious injuries. Scully takes him to England to help him move on from the FBI; and the two-- of course-- stumble across an x-file.

Si la vie est un cadeau

I'm not the Close Encounter hero, but I'm close to something...terrible. I'm Fox William Mulder... the most colossal looser of all time. I am both found and at the same time irrevocably lost to you...to this. And I want...no need to think that I didn't have a choice, ...like Sam, that all this was inevitable for some universal goodness concept, which somehow got lost or derailed along the way. I made the choice Scully, but was it mine to begin with? Was this not ordained long ago by happenstance of my birthright? When I think of what I've cost you...

Maybe I deserve all this; perhaps everything was leading to this, in some divine plan that was kept secret from us. Though I'm sure you would be the first to tell me that, God doesn't use power tools against helpless living flesh.

S8 Mulder recounts the temporary bouts of reprieve he'd feel amidst the trauma of his torture.

BONUS

I can't bounce from this list in good conscience without mentioning Vickie Moseley and Donna and Sheryl Martin and RocketMan and Cecily Sasserbaum and prufrock's love, authors I've put a lot of hours into. However, since Tumblr has limits on links per post, I'll merely suggest you search their names (e.g. #Vickie Moseley) on this blog; and limit this rec to a fic I became reacquainted with today.

prufrock’s love/plenilune’s (Ao3, Gossamer, WBM, colonizationhq)

Malebolge

"I'm not eating a bat, Mulder. We don't have any food, no drinkable water, and you've got to be freezing. Better start climbing, partner."

"I wanted to wait until you were awake - to make sure you were okay before I left you." He's on his knees, facing me, very close. I can feel the heat radiating off him in the darkness like an aura and a warm hand touches my good shoulder. "You know I care about you, don't you, Scully?"

Something was very wrong if Mulder was saying this while kneeling on my wet trench coat, half-dressed, in a cave. Maybe he hit his head - that usually precedes declarations of his love.

"I know you do, Mulder. Just go."

"Do you love me?" He'd found my hand, holding it tightly in his.

Bad wrong.

"You know I do. What's wrong, Mulder?"

AU-- Mulder and Scully (and a tour guide) become trapped in an underground cave-in, and slowly realize they're not getting out.

Thanks for reading~

Enjoy!

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insomniac-astronomer · 3 days ago

Text

Thunderbolts Fam x fem!Reader: Trying to be Sneaky

Description: Despite your best attempts to hide your chronic GI issues, Yelena and Bucky find you sneaking your medication.

Pronouns: she/her

WARNINGS: this is about gasteoparesis. Swearing. Mentions of symptoms related to that, medication (laxative). Medical gaslighting that everyone goes through when they tell you "just take miralax twice a day 😁"

Note: because I'm learning that hot girls have GI issues and it actually shouldn't be embarrassing.

*not my gif*

You gently close your laptop as your stomach begins to twist uncomfortably.

Fuck.

You were so absorbed in your work that you forgot to take your second dose of miralax. Usually you slip it into your drink at dinner so no one will notice.

You sigh, heading to the kitchen.

Surveying the drink options, you decide hot chocolate would at least be somewhat rewarding despite your stomach actively trying to strangle itself alive.

But, you're all out of packets. Only K-Cups left and the Keurig is on its last leg.

You load the pod in and press start, cringing as the machine groans to life. You glace around to make sure no one else is awake.

Finally, it starts pouring your drink and quiets down. You breathe a sigh of relief.

You shuffle back to your room and grab the miralax bottle carefully hidden in your T-shirt drawer. It feels light, you'll need to pick up some more tomorrow.

You hurry back to the kitchen before your drink can get cold. You open the bottle and begin to pour out the familiar white grains into the cap, until the flow stops halfway.

Shit.

Well, more like no shit. You peer in to check for anything that might be blocking it, but the empty bottle stares back up at you.

Suddenly, the bottle is ripped from your hand.

"Laxatives?" Yelena's familiar laughter rings from behind you. You feel your heart rate pick up, not wanting to face her while she's still holding what society might consider the most embarrassing medication to take.

"And-" Bucky slides into your view, grabbing your mug. "A cup of hot chocolate."

This could not get any worse.

You stand physically frozen. How are you supposed to respond in a situation like this? Two of the strongest assassins on Earth catching their assistant with miralax?

Yelena's laughter dies down the longer you stand there.

"Are you okay?" She places a hand on your shoulder, setting the bottle back down on the counter.

"Yep," you respond meekly.

"You woke up the whole damn tower brewing your drink." Bucky says as he fills a glass with water.

"I'm sorry," you clear your throat to get the words out.

"Um, I think-" now Bob is here, wonderful. "Maybe, we should-"

He points sheepishly to the hall. A look of understanding washes over Yelena's face.

"Oh, did I embarrass you?"

"N-" your voice catches again, "no."

"I am so sorry!" She wraps you in a rough hug from behind. "Go, take your medication."

"Okay, great-" you die slowly as you pour the half-filled dose into the cup.

Then, you realize you never grabbed a spoon. Bucky is leaning against the silverware drawer.

You take a breath of courage and awkwardly reach for the handle. "Sorry, I'm just gonna get in here-"

"Yeah, sure," he jumps away and you quickly grab the first spoon you see.

You reach for your cup, hardly paying attention. It slips from your hand and shatters onto the ground.

You stand there, spoon in hand, just staring at it.

Bob moves to start cleaning it, which snaps you back.

"No, I got it, I got it." Just as you were starting to get comfortable living with these people, something like this has to happen and ruin everything.

"Okay," Yelena bends down and begins picking up pieces of shattered ceramic. "Now I am actually sorry."

"Do you have another one?"

You jump as Ava materializes next to you, holding the empty bottle.

"No, it's fine." You focus intently on wiping up the liquid and whisper to yourself, "oh my God, this cannot be happening."

"I can go, buy you another one-" Bob steps forward, but pauses at the tears starting to roll down your cheeks.

"Hey," Ava leans down next to you. "What's going on?"

"I'm so sorry, I woke all of you up, I was already running out, now I have none, not that it helps anyway, and now you're all here trying to help me-"

"Nope, come on." Yelena wacks your arm. "No more tears. We are all friends and we all help each other."

You take a deep breath. "Thank you."

"Who made this big mess?" Alexei is suddenly towering over you wearing the largest robe you've ever seen with a giant Avengers logo on the front.

Yelena groans, "not now, Dad, go back to sleep."

"No, who smashed the mug? Was it you, 'Lena? You waking me up-"

"No, no, sorry, it was me," you carry a clump of paper towels to the trash can. "Butterfingers, anyway, I'm just going to go back to bed. Sorry to wake everyone, thanks for helping me clean, see you tomorrow."

"Bob, what happened?" Alexei turns to Bob as he awkwardly laughs. "I know you cannot lie, tell me now. That was my favorite mug."

"I have literally never seen you touch that mug." Bucky comments.

"Nonsense, I use that mug everyday."

"She, uh, we, kinda, saw her trying to sneak miralax into her drink but then she got nervous and," you give Bob a death stare. "Dropped it."

"Bob!" You snap.

"S-sorry." He takes a few steps back toward the nearest wall.

You sigh, "no, I'm sorry. I'm just . . . feeling a lot of emotion right now."

Alexei shakes his head disapprovingly. You dread what he is about to say next, expecting the worst. "What is this? You are too young to have problem. Now, I- I have problem all the time-"

"Dad! No one wants to hear that!" Yelena whines.

That just makes you feel so great about yourself.

"Why, why are you taking this bullshit?" He abruptly knocks the bottle off the table.

You are slightly stunned from the sudden violence. "My, uh, doctor told me to? I tried to tell her it wasn't working but she just, um, told me to keep at it. Forever, I guess."

"Bah!" He suddenly yells. "I go pay doctor a visit in the morning and I wear Red Guardian suit. I threaten her and if she tells you that again, I strangle her-"

"Okay, that is very much not necessary, but thanks. I'm actually good to just keep trying."

"You shouldn't have to settle." Ava says softly. "You deserve to find something that works."

"Yeah, well, at this rate, I won't. I appreciate the thought, but it's pointless." You shake your head, putting the spoon back in the drawer.

"Not that I like to agree with him," Yelena gives her father a pointed look. "But I think we should go have a little talk, see what her professional opinion is then."

"Either way," Bucky steps in before Alexei can get too excited. "We're here to help you."

"Yeah, you don't have to hide this from us." Bob says.

You smiles softly. "Thanks, guys."

"Okay, I'm exhausted. Don't wake me up in the morning or I'll tie you to the helipad for an hour." Yelena heads down the hallway.

"Same," Bucky follows her.

"Okay, kids, goodnight. I will see you in the morning for possible mission," Alexei wraps you in a bone-crushing hug.

"Yeah, possibly," you squeeze out. He finally releases you and you take a huge breath.

"If you need anything, I'm right down the hall." Ava gives you a smile and exits.

"I was serious. I can go buy you more if you need." Bob slowly creeps up to you.

"No, I'll be okay. Thank you, though. I appreciate it, Bob." You offer him a sincere smile.

"Yeah, of course."

You awkwardly wait for him to say something else. "Well, goodnight, then."

"Yeah, yeah, goodnight. Don't let the bed bugs bite."

You laugh. "You, too."

Sorry, I hate John. Actually have no idea how I would write him into this. Though I do low-key ship him and Ava so I'd prob write that.

#marvel x reader #marvel x y/n #marvel fanfiction #marvel fic #avengers x reader #avengers x you #avengers x y/n #fanfictions #thunderbolts x you #thunderbolts x y/n #thunderbolts x reader #thunderbolts #thunderbolts fam x reader #thunderbolts fam #avengers tower #yelena belova #bucky barnes #ava starr

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valeisaslut · 2 days ago

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3 YEARS?!!

oh my god in her sleep, on the guitar, ellie miller my baby.

“How she left with your heart in her hands and didn’t look back.” i know you know you cooked with that.

Just imagining Ellie being begged by Joel to go to rehab is bringing me to tears. how come in every au she’s still a girl who needs her dad. i should replay part 1

i cannot fathom how fucking awful that mustve been for y/n to be blamed for everything. lowk reminds me of Amber Heard (still feel bad for her ngl)

JOEL MVP IM IN TEARS (can we tell i don’t have a good relationship with my dad)

“Your voice, your strongest weapon, was now was working against you. It kept betraying, trembling with every word, cracking more horribly each time you tried to swallow the grief. The grief of singing songs you once believed in. Songs that were alive when she still was yours.” I died. my funeral is monday.

“Not because you wanted to. Not because you could. But because it was all you had left to give.

And the only thought echoing in your skull was how impossible it felt that this had once made you happy. That once, the stage had been freedom. Purpose. Joy.

Because now, it felt like a sentence.”

you are so sadistic bc how could you want characters to go through this much 😖😞

“‘You’re safe,’she murmured. ‘You made it through. It’s over, baby. The show 's over.’”

i need a rachel.

“‘I’m done, I'm done,’ you choked out, not even able to hear your own voice over the pounding in your ears. ‘I’m done. I can’t do this anymore—I’m not going back, I won’t—I can’t—I—I want it to be over—‘“

Nothing can describe this absolutely debilitating feeling of throwing in the towel.

I know you know you cooked with:

“‘She won’t recover if you kill her first.’”

the taco bell weed penthouse 😞

HER FAMILY DIDNT CALL??

crying for and mourning yourself is another level of dread and helplessness

“You flopped backward on the pillows, arm thrown over your eyes. ‘So maybe I’ll just go back to my fucking hometown in the South. Marry a man. Have a lavender marriage. Get a dog named Earl. Die slowly.’”

But in a way, that would be dying quickly. it’d be suicide, killing every aspect of herself to live this life.

“You sighed, turning to face the wall. ‘Maybe I’ll move to a little town in Argentina. Change my name. Get three cats. Upload music to SoundCloud under an alias.’”

Hey Val do you have cats or a soundcloud we don’t know about.

“The city was still there.”

actually hit so hard bc life is still going world is still turning, ellie is still there somewhere, but she is not the focus.

“‘And this one… I wrote a long time ago. After I found her in the bathroom. I don’t think I ever really came back from that.’”

Going through that would be so traumatizing honestly. I think about that all the time myself.

“‘Let them cry in the club.’” LFMSOOO

LMFAO RACHEL HAVING A LAW DEGREE OFC YOU NEEDED TO MAKE HER MORE OF A SELF INSERT BABE

“They didn’t understand why, after all that, after everything—you still sang about her like she was holy”

OH MY GODDDDDUHHH THE WORLD

DOESNT EVEN UNDERSTAND THEY PLAYED A PART IN THE BREAK UP. THRY WERE WHY ELLIE DID DRUGS WHICH LEAD TO EVERYTHING ELSE.

“‘Supernova isn’t a comeback album. It's not a rebrand. It’s not an apology or a reinvention. It's a war report. My version of the story.’”

OHHHHHH MYY GODDD IM SORRY FOR BEING RECEPTIVE BUT MY JAW CANNOT FALL FARTHER.

"’Because that’s what a supernova is—a dead star. A star that explodes at the end of its life, and still manages to shine brighter than ever before. A last, defiant burst of light.Brighter than anything else in the sky. Brighter even in its ending.’”

how tf did i not pick up on that when i first read it i feel stupid.

“‘And if the main person who inspired this album is watching…’” stab me in the heart sure why not?

“‘I hope you know I made it through.’

Your voice cracked a little. Tears started flowing with more force.

‘I hope you found your way back to yourself, wherever you are. I hope you’re safe. I hope you're not afraid of your own name anymore.’”

stop it. please i beg they deserve joy. hell, I DESERVE JOY.

“‘I will love you until the day I die. Always .’”

OH GOD. pouring one (bottle) out tonight.

ABIGAIL ANDERSON WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?!

“And then she kissed you.”

Ms.Anderson consent. por favor. hello. i already don’t like her.

“Inside: a diamond necklace. Massive. Blinding.”

oh thank god i thought it’d be a ring.

“She hadn’t asked about your day. Not about what you were writing. Not how you were feeling.

Just sports. And how hot you looked. And diamond gifts you didn’t ask for.”

exactly she’s not our girl who only eats the blue peanut m&ms.

“Music didn’t just tie you together. It fused you. Deep and sacred and permanent .”

Rocket Queen 2:16

“#1: Lover, You Should’ve Come Over – Ellie Williams”

oh. my. god.

oh my god. no like oh my god.

this is a spiritual reading. a sermon. you’ve taken each line and wrung it out like it bled into your veins and now we’re just here, lying side by side in the wreckage. i feel like i just had a religious experience in reverse.

starting off with “3 YEARS?!!” as a war cry is so real because yeah. three years of silence. of grief calcifying into survival. and then you hit me with "ellie miller my baby” and i was done. flatlined.

she’s still a girl who needs her dad. in every timeline. in every universe. the world changes, but that truth doesn’t. and the fact that you connected that to your own relationship?? i’m holding your hand. i’m holding it so gently.

“I know you know you cooked with that.” yes. yes i did. and i appreciate that you said it.

the quotes you pulled. the way you felt them. "the stage felt like a sentence" / “she won’t recover if you kill her first” / “the city was still there”—you understood. you saw the entire shape of the ache. you didn’t just read it. you carried it.

and the commentary??? “her family didn’t call??” / “taco bell weed penthouse 😞” `(I DIED AT THIS ONE LMAO) / “thank god i thought it’d be a ring” no like HOW ARE YOU FUNNY AND TRAGIC. who gave you this much power.

you quoting “you still sang about her like she was holy” and then immediately screaming about how THE WORLD PLAYED A PART IN THEIR BREAKUP… i’m sobbing. because YES. people always forget that kind of harm. the passive destruction. the watching. the silence. the shame they encouraged. ellie didn’t burn out in a vacuum—she got watched into ruin.

and the fact that you caught that “Supernova” isn’t just a metaphor but a scientific fact wrapped in grief?? like “a dead star that shines brighter at the end”??

“stop it. please i beg they deserve joy. hell, I DESERVE JOY.” YES YOU DO. YES THEY DO. YES WE ALL DO.

and then abby shows up and you’re just like “Ms. Anderson, consent. por favor.” NOOOOO 😭😭😭 CONSENTIMIENTO. POR FAVOR.

you are everything. your brain is perfect. this message is going in the vault. thank you for screaming and mourning and clawing through every inch of that chapter like it was a grave you were trying to resurrect someone from. you get it.

🕯️ meet me at Rocket Queen 2:16.

#val answers anons!💜

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ghouljams · 12 hours ago

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hi, I hope you don't mind me asking a few questions about the super divorced price situation bc I love it, big fan of women leaving shitty men.

How many of the weddings have the rest of 141 been invited to? Did anyone had the balls to tell price "sorry man I'm busy that day but I'll catch the next one"?

Did price actually believe these marriages would work out? Like, after a certain number of divorces did he start to pick up on the fact that the next marriage would probably be ending the same way but was just too stubborn and selfish to stop turning his new wives and children into collateral damage, or did he honestly think on marriage number 8 that THIS was the one for sure?

At some point has anyone (ex wives or the 141. or both) start making bets with each other on how long it will be until the new mrs price gets sick of John's shit?

And last, do the ex wives ever get together for a big family photo and if so are any of them sending that it on Christmas cards? Because if not, as ex wife 8 we should organize that.

yippee a lore drop question

The first of Price's weddings that the 141 went to was for Wife 5, but they had previously met wife 4 and they'd all felt sort of weird about Price being married to a woman half his age, so they were glad Wife 5 was at least, like, more reasonable... The 141 thought this was Price's second wedding, but wife 5 made a joke about "fifth time's the charm" and all of them turned to look at Price so fast Johnny got whiplash. They tried to play it cool for his sixth wedding but by seven they were over it. Ghost was telling Price maybe marriage isn't for him, Soap was already raising one of Price's kids, Gaz was pining for wife 4, it was a mess. None of them were surprised when the marriage was over within the year, and none of them were surprised to see the invite to your wedding.

Price doesn't care whether or not the marriage "works out" because for him the marriage isn't about love it's about convenience. "Wife" is what you call the thing that takes care of the house while you're away and lets you fuck it when you're home. Sometimes the wife gets pregnant and it makes him feel like more of a man, but he doesn't really like kids so he's never sad to see them go. It's annoying when the wife leaves, but they're replaceable so he doesn't really care.

The 141 will give a very quick "six months" "I think a year" "no no this is gonna be one of the longer ones, three years" at the wedding and then won't discuss it again until Price stops wearing his wedding ring. Then one of them gets 5 quid. The ex wives don't make bets as much as they make contingency plans. "So this one looks gullible and she totally brushed off 2 which means we're looking at a few years and probably a kid, let's set up a college fund and start adding to the slush account again so that when the divorce happens at least she has a safety net, God knows John isn't giving her one."

The ex-wives usually do Christmas cards both individual and with the whole family. The one with all of them and all the kids usually only gets sent to the 141 (minus Price) mostly because they're the ones that think it's horrifying in a kind of funny way. Usually it's only sent out if a new ex joins the group as a "It's an Ex(wife) :D" sort of announcement. Otherwise everyone makes their own cards to send to their own families. The wives and kids get along fine, but their extended families aren't close with each other, so they don't really care about seeing who else their Price in-law was fucking.

#x oc #cod x oc #the divorced price au

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stormsbourne · 6 hours ago

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the thing that really makes me mad honestly is the people who are like "well, I should be rewarded for all the Correct Choices I made in dao/2/i by having the south survive because of who I put on the throne or if I supported Merrill" or whatever. it really drives home the idea that dragon age "fans" just want a pat on the back for making the Right Choices. a lot of people are very attached to the world states they made where they made shit choices. people shouldn't get rewarded because they made the choice that you specifically think is correct.

I'm very attached to my dwarf warden, Maesha. Maesha desperately, desperately tried to get Alistair to agree to the dark ritual and he simply would not do it (hardened + crowned, that makes him very unlikely to agree!) should I be punished for playing her in character since Kieran doesn't exist, even though she tried her best? should I be punished for the fact that she chose to sacrifice herself, which btw, is the most common ending? I'm a fan of my inq Mhasi, who exiled the Wardens because she believed that they couldn't be trusted after they panicked and started summoning demons. should I be punished for playing her arc in character? I'm a fan of my Hawkes who had Isabela leave after act 2 or ones who tried to deter Merrill from her work with the eluvian (don't ask how many Hawkes I have). should I be punished because they didn't comply with the Most Ideal Worldstate? I like my Wardens who crowned Anora, I'm attached to my inquisitors who sided with the templars, I have Hawkes who ended up viscount because they went along with the templars.

Sure. I get it. You're frustrated that they "destroyed the south," as though southern thedas hasn't been through this kind of shit multiple times in the past 20 yrs. This is reading unnecessary malice into a bit that's intended to show how wide reaching the conflict is, not to tell you "your work was for nothing!," but whatever. Fine. The solution to that is not to have One Correct World state that makes the south invincible. what you are saying is that you want bioware to wind back on the entire concept of dragon age as a series where you can make whatever choices you want. what you are saying is, "but I did all the RIGHT things! I should be rewarded for doing all the CORRECT THINGS!"

(this isn't even MENTIONING how one reason datv has so little past world state stuff is because it was intended to also appeal to people who have never touched the series, lol, but that's not relevant to my wider point, which is:)

I made a post months ago speculating that a lot of people were unhappy with veilguard because they wanted to be rewarded for making the Right Decision and this is where so much arguing about Treviso and Minrathous came from. frankly I've only been more convinced of this take since, as I saw people arguing that specific character choices were "obvious bad endings" and anybody who chose them made the Wrong Decision -- even though maybe your elf Rook wants the elves to make their own identity instead of clinging to the propaganda computer of an ancient fascist, or maybe your mourn watch Rook understands that Manfred is still intact back in the fade, his original home, or maybe your Rook thinks anger is a justifiable emotion for Harding to have in the wake of what was done to the dwarves, and that it can be forged into a weapon. there's no bad endings or wrong choices. but the fandom desperately wants there to be, so they can call people names for picking the wrong city or attempt to frame anyone who made different decisions than them as not only Wrong, but also Bad.

one of the themes of dragon age is that the world is complicated, that the choices you make are shaped by the world you come from and the information you have. and also, that those choices will ripple outward in ways you can't anticipate. what point is there to having a Correct Canon Good Worldstate besides to assuage the players who are too attached to the decisions they made being Correct? it would go against the themes of the series in general, but especially the themes of veilguard, a game about how you have to stop having regrets about what you did or didn't do and stop dwelling in the world of could-have-been. or you will be trapped in that false, illusory world forever.

#datv #dragon age fandom critical #I guess that's the tag for this shit #I got recommended that one “I KNOW BETTER THAN YOU BIOWARE” post again and saw red. sorry #dragon age #dragon age the veilguard #dragon age veilguard

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iamthemess · 23 hours ago

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I'm having the most insane brain fanfic rn (day dream)

The absolute chaos that could be Bruce one day finding a positive pregnancy test in one of the Manor bathrooms.

One of two options happen from this. One, he respects everyone's privacy and let's them deal with this on their own terms.

Two he goes full freak out dad mode and gathers all his children in one room for an emergency meeting because he needs answers right now so he can handle the situation.

The second one is much more fun.

He assures them all that whoever it belongs to, he's not mad at them he just wants to know so he can support them in whatever their choices are.

Everyone is shocked, mouths are agape and they're all looking at each other as if they'll know who it is at a glance.

No one admits to it.

Bruce nods calmly and let's them know they can talk to him at any time.

They think this is going to be the end of it. It's not. No one is allowed to leave until he figures it out.

He needs to know so he can support them and also its been a few hours now and when he saw his children all together in one place his curiosity to solve the mystery over took his brain.

Like a murder mystery without murder.

He interrogates each of them individually, giving the same spiel as before about wanting to help and support them, financially or emotionally.

He's totally fine with this. If it's his older children, he's going to be overjoyed, but if it's the younger ones, he might have a minor heart attack first, but really, he should have expected that.

As the youngest Damian gets hounded on the most, mostly with love and support and Damian is losing his mind. He says it has nothing to do with him over and over as Bruce let's him know that whatever he does is okay he just needs to make sure they're safe.

Damian refuses to admit to anything.

Duke is next.

He refuses to admit to anything and stares Bruce down for half an hour in silence like he's being interrogated by a cop as Bruce is on the verge of tears. Duke tells him it's got nothing to do with him, but either way, he should drop it and respect privacy. (He wants to know too badly and will be trying to snoop on his siblings later.)

Before he leaves he turns to Bruce, looks him dead in the eyes and asks how he knows it isn't him.

Bruce has to make some calls and in the next hour Selina shows up. She denies all involvement, she wants to be included in the drama.

She also talks privately with all the kids just to make sure everyone is alright while Bruce is full on interrogating them.

Bruce is full on crosses Tim off his list on the account of being very gay right now. But his siblings are cornering him in the living room and forcing him to admit if he cheated on his boyfriend or not.

He swears up and down he didn't.

Steph is next and Bruce is stating at her more judgmental than the rest as she gives him a look that says, really?

He says something about her being statistically the most likely candidate before she shakes her head refuses to admit to any involvement and leaves the room.

He marks her down as a possible candidate. Pissing her off is okay as long as she's safe.

Jason's next, he glares at Bruce, says No, and tries to leave as Bruce is asking if he's absolutely sure.

Jason flips him off and tells him to get out of everyone's business.

He's put down as a very wobbly, maybe.

By the time he gets to Cass, Selina says she's heading off and knows all she needs to know without elaborating. She does not answer any of Bruce's questions about the matter.

Cass stares unblinking at Bruce 💅🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈

He marks her off the list.

Dick refuses to go next. He's a damn adult and should not be treated this way. Bruce forces him into his makeshift interrogation room.

He starts off with, "for the record. I don't know anything about that." And the rest of the conversations turns into a yelling match about wanting privacy and safety and something about responsibility.

Babs doesn't go into the room. She death stares him and tells him it's not her, but if it was, he has no right to do this to her or anyone, and he should be ashamed.

He has everyone call up their friends (anyone who's been in the Manor recently) and talk to them about it.

It's some of the most awkward phone calls they've ever made.

It's getting late, and there are no leads. Bruce has no idea where the fuck this thing came from but he will be making up a power point and a lecture about safe sex and birth control and options.

Alfred figured it out by the end of the day. He made sure they were okay and made them explain themselves. It was a false positive but they were so freaked at the time they forgot to properly dispose of the evidence.

That's enough for Alfred. He keeps this information to himself and tells everyone to have a good evening as they all pack up and leave.

It drives Bruce insade for a month before he decides to give in and forget about it. Obviously, it's not a big deal to them, but he's still curious af who it is.

#batfam #batfamily shenanigans #batfamily #bruce wayne #bruce gained several grey hairs #the whole thing made him slightly more nuts #ill let you decide who it is #Dick absolutely tried to say it was him messing around but that panicked Bruce even more #Dick got a full body scan that day and a health check up #even if Bruce knew he was lying and trying to cover for someone

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inawickedlittletown · 8 hours ago

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Working on part four of Through The Darkness To The Dawn my 8x17/8x18 fic. It's a Tommy pov so of course Lucy has suddenly made an appearance. I'm a little over 1k into it so I figured let's give everyone a small snippet:

“Hey, they’ll make out of this. They always—” Lucy trailed off. “Sorry, I guess they don’t, but they will. They will this time.”

Tommy forgot sometimes that Lucy had worked under Bobby too for a time.

“They will,” Tommy said.

Lucy nudged him. “Have you talked to any of them? How are they doing?”

Tommy thought to the day before when Evan had arrived at his doorsteps with bags full of groceries and his duffle slung over his shoulder. He’d looked a lot better than the first night he’d arrived there, but there was no denying the cloud of grief and sadness that clung to him.

“I saw Evan,” Tommy said. “Haven’t seen or heard from the rest of them since the funeral. I guess I can’t blame them.”

“No,” Lucy said. “How is Buck?”

“He’s doing his best,” Tommy said. “He’s thinking about transferring to another station. Actually, he’s pretty sure he will.”

Lucy’s eyes widened. “What? Hey, you should tell Cap, she’ll definitely be interested in bringing him over. But wait, why? This is Buck we’re talking about. He loves the 118. I heard he even sued the department so he could keep working there.”

Tommy didn’t like the gossip, but he did need to talk to someone about it and Lucy knew the 118. He’d worked with them. Lucy probably knew more about that lawsuit than Tommy did since Evan had never talked to him about it.

“I guess ever since Bobby passed things haven’t been the same,” Tommy said.

“What did he expect?”

“Maybe for them to be there for each other?” Tommy asked. He was still more than a little annoyed about it.

At that Lucy frowned. “What does that mean?”

So, Tommy explained. He told her about Evan coming over the other night and how isolated he’d been feeling, how Eddie had made him feel selfish and put Bobby’s death on him and how no one seemed to care or see how hard he was trying.

“Wow,” Lucy said. “And I thought they were all way too codependent.”

Tommy shrugged his shoulders. “Me too. I guess…well, they’re all dealing with it differently. Evan just feels like he’d be better off taking himself out of the picture and starting fresh at another station. Not this one.”

“Why not this one?”

“Because this wouldn’t be a fresh start. For one thing there’s me and for another there’s you. He needs to go somewhere where he isn’t known where he can prove to himself that he isn’t that naive probie that Bobby helped shape into a great firefighter.”

That was how Evan had put it the night before while they ate dinner.

#bucktommy #bucktommy fic #911 fic #tommy kinard #lucy donato #911 abc #writing

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seaglassmelody · 2 days ago

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A Word With Friends

Haha I'm a day earlier this week!!

Thanks so much to @davrinsleftpectoral for hosting this week! Thanks as always to @hedwigoprah for the game and thank you @blackwall-my-tiny-husband for the tag :D

Tagging @thedissonantverses, @chaosherald, @thecraftybaroness, @antivan-sprig, @therivercrow, @basedonconjecture, and anyone else who wants to do it! If you've done it already, let me know I wanna see!!

This week's word is: Susurration

Definition (noun): The indistinct sound of people whispering/whispering, murmuring, or rustling

Little post-Veilguard walk in the woods under the cut! Wanted to focus on the idea of continuing adventures together, and had to include Davrin for Davrin week <3

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The forest was peaceful, for once. No surging magic, no falling rocks, no marauding constructs.

Sabriel stood, listening to the susurration of the wind through the trees, carrying the faint voices of the spirits that still roamed Arlathan. She hoped to meet more of them, to see how their perspectives differed from those in the Necropolis.

She had taken the initiative in Dock Town to speak to spirits - Eulogy had been quite generous in their help with contacting the ones that were friendlier to the living. But the ones in Arlathan seemed more skittish, distant.

"Rook? Are you even paying attention?" Davrin's voice came from atop the ridge.

Right. She was actually here to check on the griffons with him. After days of meandering the hallways of Villa Dellamorte, Lucanis had practically kicked her out.

"You need something more active to do." He had said. "If the Necropolis won't have you, I'm sure Davrin or Bellara would be happy to take you on a hike."

Honestly. She was trying to be on hand in case he needed help catching up on work for the Crows, but clearly her presence had been unwelcome.

"Rook!" Davrin was getting a little impatient.

"Coming!" She hurried up the ridge, her lungs burning by the time she reached the top. "Sorry…there's…spirits nearby…"

Davrin shook his head, stalling so she could catch her breath. "It's like dealing with Antoine all over again."

"Well…I would say my mysterious whispers aren't likely to influence my mind, but that wouldn't quite be the truth would it?" Sabriel laughed self-deprecatingly. "Don't worry, I won't let them distract me from our real objective. I have to see how big Stormwing's gotten!"

Davrin smiled, pleased. "Crookytail was the biggest last time, but I think he might get overtaken soon."

Assan crowed dissent, making Davrin laugh.

"Crookytail was bigger than you and you know it."

Sabriel patted Assan on the side. "No one can beat our Assan for speed, though." The griffon squawked triumphantly.

Davrin smiled. "Don't get a big head now, boy."

Assan flicked his tail and took off into the air, flying ahead of them as if to prove just how fast he was.

Sabriel sighed wistfully. "Just think. One day you'll be able to go up there with him."

Davrin nudged their arm as he picked up his pace to lead the way to Eldrin's. "I might be able to persuade him to take you too."

"Oh, I'm sure that would make Spite terribly jealous."

"Well then maybe Lucanis should get off his ass and let Spite take you flying."

Sabriel choked on a startled laugh. "I'll tell him you said so."

"Oh you better not-"

The lighthearted conversation echoed through the trees as they approached Eldrin's cabin, where they greeted by a chorus of discordant squawking and begging for treats.

#a word with friends #I'm not making this an official davrin week submission bc it's short and not really that focused haha #but I wanted to write him some more #he's fun #oc: sabriel ingellvar #my writing #dragon age #veilguard

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danganronpasurvivoraskblog · 2 days ago

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THE HUNDRED LINE: LAST DEFENSE ACADEMY - Journal #6: Route 0 Days 67-80. [MASSIVE SPOILERS]

//Yeah, I wanted to play as much of this game as fucking possible. Pumped as hell because I'm for sure at the home stretch now.

//I distinctly remember some people who read my previous journals didn't give much away, but they were telling me that I was really gonna enjoy this next portion of gameplay.

//And you guys were definitely right about that. The Moko chapter of this route and the horrific imagery we saw of that definitely got my heart racing, but this was an emotional pummeling of its own.

//It interests me that the more we go along and the closer we get to Day 100, the worse things seem to get for us.

//One of my biggest highlights of this section is that it actually reprimanded a lot of the problems I had with the Tsukumo Twins and their initial character arc in the story, even though Ima, for reasons we covered at the end of the last journal, is mostly absent for this one.

//But I digress. We've got some shit to cover, so let's just get into it, and as always...

DO NOT READ THE REST OF THIS POST IF YOU HAVE NOT PLAYED/SEEN THE HUNDRED LINE: LAST DEFENSE ACADEMY. I WILL BE TALKING ABOUT VERY SPECIFIC PLOT POINTS AND MAJOR SPOILERS FOR THE GAME.

//So let's get started:

DAY 67:

//To give a quick recap as to where we left off, things have kind of brutally hit the fan.

//The group is reeling after the devastating loss of Moko, only for things to get worse the next morning. The captured Invader escapes under suspicious circumstances.

//The crisis deepens when the Tsukumo Twins go missing. Kako returns alone, injured, revealing that the Invader escaped with Ima, a new team member who had just begun fitting in.

//Worse yet, the group is trapped inside the school by surrounding flames, with broken fire extinguishers and no way to escape or resupply.

//For now, it's up to Tsubasa to prepare the Fire Extinguishers so we can go after Ima and potentially save him, but again, I wasn't holding my breath. This game has clearly shown that it's more than willing to kill off its main characters with reckless abandon. If Ima came out the other side of this as a corpse, I wouldn't even be surprised.

//Leave it to Kodaka to cut character arcs short, hahahaaaa...

//Anyway, today was another day of just Free Time, so not much really happened. However, I was curious whether or not the Report Card had changed now that we had confirmation that Moko was dead. Because she did appear in the file once she joined the group.

//Turns out I was right, because Moko's character sprite in the Report Card is darkened. Which...yeah, she's basically never coming back I guess...

//Interestingly, Hiruko still isn't blacked out, which suggests that MAYBE she could return? But it's been two months now since she went missing. I'm not holding out for a hero.

DAY 68:

//So Darumi gained the ability to read minds and see through the fourth wall!

//In other news, as expected, Kako is depressed over losing her brother, so she won't leave her room. Tsubasa is still trying to fix the extinguishers, but it's pretty challenging work, even for her.

//However, on top of all that crap, we now have another NOTHER problem! As Nozomi comes into the cafeteria and...collapses.

//Now, I kind of saw this coming, because Nozomi has been working herself to death trying to take care of "Moko" and now she should be winding down, but curiously, she mutters that her condition has something to do with "rejection symptoms."

//Takumi, Kyoshika, and Kurara take her to her room, and she's gonna be bedridden for a while. And unfortunately, these two clowns STILL for some reason think Takumi wants to have his way with her, so they're guarding her, and he can't ask her for any follow up questions.

//Nozomi already let her guard down enough to tell Takumi that the circumstances on which she joined this war are a bit different from the rest of us, so of all people, he's the one she's most likely to choose to open up to. But so long as Takumi is being cockblocked by these two, it'll be a while before we get our next Nozomi Lore DumpTM.

//So yeah, more Free Time ensues.

//I actually got a little miffed with this one, because right now, I've been trying to focus on leveling up my social stats/grades so that I could get it to a high enough level and upgrade my equipment. Like my traps and potions and stuff, because I'd like to have some of these in a higher quality.

//However, while getting the stats is simple enough, I don't currently have enough resources to craft/upgrade them. Which means I need to go on another search mission to get what I need.

//But on top of Nozomi being indisposed, meaning I can't as readily go out and get the materials I need, since my healer isn't here to keep the party spick and span like usual, but even if she was here, I can't go out anyway because the EXTINGUISHERS ARE BROKEN!

//The ONE TIME I actually WANT to go on one of these missions, I can't! GREAAAAT!

//It's especially bad when upgrading the thing I REALLY want to boost, which is the Spring Traps.

//No, not THAT ONE!

//Spring Traps, since I haven't brought it up yet, are craftable devices you can use in battles that let your characters bounce to distant areas on the battlefield with no movement cost. Really useful if you need to get someone around, however they are very limited in supply and need to be upgraded to get more, just like every other special equipment.

//But these one's are SO EXPENSIVE! Not only are they resource heavy, but you have to have Level 3 in Social Studies, Gym, AND Linguistics in order to raise them to a level higher than 2!

//WHY!? And why those three stats in particular!?

//Eh whatever...this sucks...I must be turning into Gaku because I have the worst luck in the world.

//Anyway, we end the night with another Karua scene and...this is the last one we have for what feels like a WHILE. The game even points out that this is the last one we see.

//And we actually don't get much from this one. We just see Karua taking care of a stubborn Takumi who is sick in bed. Apparently, so is his mother.

//Most of Karua's scenes in the game tend to hint towards situations that happen to Takumi in subsequent days of the story. For example, the first one was of Takumi finding Karua after she got lost, and then the very next day, needs to employ those same skills to rescue Eito from a difficult predicament.

//And then we have the scene of them at the fast food place, where Karua asks Takumi what he'd do if she woke up one day and didn't know who he was. Subsequently leading to Takumi meeting Nozomi for the first time, who seems to be Karua with amnesia.

//This one's a little different because this time, it's NOZOMI who's sick, not Takumi. So the connection is not too clear this time.

DAY 69:

youtube

//THERE IS NO FUCKING WAY YOU MADE A SPECIAL UNIQUE MORNING ANNOUNCEMENT TO CELEBRATE DAY 69!!!??

//This is normally the part where everyone (myself included) would make a really unfunny joke and say "nice" or some bullshit! But these jokes write themselves!

//Sirei's English Voice Actor in these scenes sounds like he's struggling to read these lines with a straight face, and is even laughing in the middle of it. I don't see why else he would let out those sudden breaths like that. But hey, the man does his job right.

//And hilariously, as Sirei says in this clip, for today and TODAY ONLY, the background music that you hear every day in this game is replaced by a rock and roll cover of it.

//AWESOME! lmao!

//At the same time though, is this an implication that the BGM, at least when we're inside the school, is canon? I'm...not sure what to make of that honestly.

//Anyway, today was actually a lot better in terms of the group's mood, largely because Kako made her grand return.

//...much more quickly than I thought she would. I seriously was thinking she might up and vanish for a few days, but no, just the one.

//Kako reveals that after their battle with the Imposter Moko, she and Ima made a promise. Should one of them died during the war, the other wasn't allowed to follow them into death.

//Apparently, it was a reversal of their old vow.Originally, they swore never to be apart, having only ever relied on each other and distrusting outsiders. But their time at the Academy, and the compassion they received despite their past behavior, changed their perspective.

//She also shares that the night before, she had a dream, or rather, a memory, of Ima from their childhood. In it, he told her that isolating herself and crying wouldn’t fix anything, and that nothing would get better unless she took action.

//Remembering this gave her the strength to keep going, and now she's more determined than ever to find and save her brother.

//Takumi even points it out in the scene, but it feels a lot like his own dreams/memories with Karua.

//And in the back of my mind, I'm thinking maybe something is happening to us that is triggering these memories. Maybe it's related to the Hemoanima or something, but it seems convinient that Takumi, Kako, and Shouma all had dreams/memories about their past that have proven to be very relevant to whatever current situation we are in.

//I'm willing to bet the rest of us are having these same dreams, and most are just not talking about them.

//I really like the character progression with Kako here. And it bounces back on Ima in some regard as well. Previously, most of the scenes the twins got, which wasn't that many because they weren't frontline fighters for the longest time, most of their scenes had Ima be the dominant character in them.

//It sucks that he's gone, but at least it gives Kako more space to actually be a character independent of her brother, even if her motivation is still to rescue him.

//And she's very slowly encroaching best girl territory now that she has a chance to flaunt her (not physical) stuff.

//She immediately proves to be a massive G, as she gives Takumi the opportunity he needs to talk to Nozomi, by asking him if he can help her carry some water to her room. Apparently, Kako had a vision that not only was Nozomi in trouble, but that Takumi helped her out of it. So she gives him the chance to get by Kurara and Kyoshika's oppression and talk to her.

//The girl is a legend, but unfortunately...said talk doesn't go too well.

//Takumi earnestly wants to help Nozomi, but Nozomi feels like she's being pitied because she happens to look like Karua. Despite his insistence, and despite her willingness to open up to him, and despite the fact that she's really badly sick, she doesn't cave to him, or tell him about her symptoms.

//During today's Free Time event, I wanted more of Kako, so I spent some time with her. There was this really funny scene where she admits that she's trying to figure out who in the academy she would kill and how if she were to commit serial murder here.

//It's okay though; it's for a novel she's writing.

//I'll be completely honest. I haven't spent all that much time doing hangout events in this game. I probably should, but when it comes to increasing stats, they're pretty nonessential in comparison to just giving gifts that the characters like.

//But the downside is that it means I miss out on awesome conversations like this one, and the one where Kurara threatened to shoot Gaku. Which is a bit disappointing.

DAY 70:

//Day 70, which means we only have one month left, and we're basically done with this school. Feels kinda surreal that we're at the home stretch now.

//And with it comes some good news, and some bad news.

//The good news is Tsubasa successfully managed to repeat the fire extinguisher, which means we should be able to leave the school again.

//The bad news is we can't rescue Ima, because we need to school bus if we're going to catch up with the invaders that took him, we need the school bus. And even though Tsubasa was able to repair the extinguisher on THAT, the bus itself is still currently out of gas.

//Thus, Takumi, Eito, and a very enthusiastic Kako head out with the new pump to get some.

//Standard exploration mission here and we achieve our goal, but THANK GOD my FLAME LEVEL FINALLY WENT UP ONE!

//Does this thing only get stronger every month!? I've seen this shit go up to at least Level 6! Is there any way I can make it better myself, or do I just wait for plot progression?

//Someone please genuinely tell me. I don't want to be playing this game wrong.

DAY 71:

//I got really scared when Sirei's morning announcement got interrupted, but thankfully there was no alarm. Just Kako showing up, super excited to rescue her bro.

//She's adorable~

//But yeah, like Kako says in this dialogue box, we go to hold a strategy meeting in the War Room for what we're going to do about rescuing Ima and recapturing the prisoner. Fortunately, we already had a plan set in motion.

//Apparently, Yugamu had a hunch that Shouma might try something suspicious with the prisoner, like helping her escape, so as a precaution, he secretly planted a transmitter on her.

//He doesn’t reveal exactly WHERE he hid it, which is more than a little unsettling...but it at least gives them a way to track her now that she's gone.

//What's more important though, is he explains that he kept this move to himself because he suspects there might be a traitor among them.

//FUCKING FINALLY someone says it out loud!

//Even if it's just a hunch, it's such a goddamn relief to hear that someone else is starting to realize their group could be under attack from within!

//I should also mention here that interestingly, Eito was the first to dismiss Yugamu’s theory, which is a little too fast and defensive for comfort.

//Now, with Ima in enemy hands, a strike team has been assembled to rescue him. Takumi, Tsubasa, Kako, and Shouma will be the ones heading out to face whatever threat is out there.

//Hi yes, hello, HOW?

//Daddy wants to drive the bus today~ Daddy wants to drive the bus~ Little bit of daddy bus drivin'~ Daddy wants to drive the bus~

//Also, real talk, why does this CG on the bus look like it was drawn by a completely different artist in a completely different style? This looks like a painting!

//So yeah, we get on the bus, and Tsubasa drives us all the way to where the prisoner's signal is being transmitted, BUT-

//It leads us...to an ENEMY BASE.

//We don't have sufficient enough firepower to storm this place and rescue Ima, so we currently have no option but to retreat and inform the others back at the school.

//Which...I kind of call bullshit on? We've fought this many Invaders in WAY fewer numbers. Four people, which is what we HAVE, is typically what we use for scouting parties?

//Eh, plot says no.

//I was really worried at this point that Kako might do something reckless, like storm the base herself, but thankfully, she seems to have more common sense than that. So we table the issue for the next day.

DAY 72:

//I gotta say, I do love it when you get to see the characters talk war strategy. It really makes the situation we're in feel more authentic, especially when we don't have Sirei, Hiruko or Nigou here to instruct us.

//But suffice to say that things have gotten a TAD complicated.

//The problem we face currently is we need as strong a strike force as we can muster to raid the enemy base and potentially rescue Ima if he's there, but at the same time, we can't leave the school defenceless either, which means the team is gonna have to split up for now.

//It takes a bit of discussion, but Takumi, Shouma, Kako, Eito, and Takemaru all agree to go fight the Invaders at the base, leaving Darumi, Tsubasa, Gaku, Kurara, Kyoshika and Yugamu to defend the school.

//However, it's not all doom and gloom, as Kurara sends a message to Takumi revealing that Nozomi is willing to speak to him.

//I do love it when Nozomi gets to be the plot girl. As I've said a few times before, I ADORE the worldbuilding and lore of this game. It's not something Kodaka really does with Danganronpa a lot, and when he does, it's usually in his less-impresssive projects (DR3 and Ultra Despair Girls) but DAMN is he good at it in this game! Tribe Nine too as a matter of fact.

//Takumi goes to meet Nozomi, and kicks off the conversation by telling her that he's no longer comparing Nozomi to Karua, true connection be damned. I know for a fact that this isn't gonna be the end of the mystery though, even if Takumi doesn't keep searching for it.

//Especially because there's an interesting little scene here when Takumi finally namedrops Karua to Nozomi.

//I think there's a little bit more to her reaction here than her just reacting to Takumi bringing it up. I think the name is familiar to her, even if she doesn't quite know why.

//But we don't get any more details on that in this conversation. We DO however, get a pretty hefty lore dump on the truth behind this war! Including Nozomi confirming something that I had GUESSED a long time back!

//Something that, I'll be honest, WAS pretty obvious, but even so, score!

//I'm effectively about to paraphrase what she said, purely because I'm super into this lore. So I hope you guys don't mind.

//Nozomi begins her explanation by finally revealing the truth behind her mysterious illness. The “rejection symptoms” she previously mentioned are actually her body reacting negatively to the Hemoanima within her. Essentially, her own blood is rejecting her.

//Until now, everyone, including Takumi, believed that Hemoanima was simply the result of their blood being altered when they stabbed themselves with their Infusers. They were told that the Infusers themselves were tools that allowed them to access their Class Armor and Weapons.

//But Nozomi explains that this understanding is incomplete. If Hemoanima were just a byproduct of the infusers, then anyone could use it.

//The reality is that the infusers don’t create Hemoanima, they AWAKEN it. They only work on individuals who already possess a rare type of blood that contains dormant Hemoanima.

//Everyone at the academy, including Takumi, was chosen precisely because they carry this special blood. Which is exactly what I predicted when I played the prologue for this game.

//This rare blood type is called "Cryptoglobin." A term coined by Nozomi’s mother, who was a leading researcher on the subject.

//Cryptoglobin is no ordinary blood. It has bizarre, almost supernatural properties that can’t be explained by current medical science. It can shift between liquid and solid states at will and reacts directly to the host’s emotions, especially aggression and willpower. In essence, it’s combat-adapted blood, seemingly designed for warfare.

//HOW CONVINIENT!

//Nozomi’s mother conducted her research at Kamukura General Hospital, which, while appearing to be a normal hospital, was actually a covert Cryptoglobin research facility.

//This ties back to a memory Shouma once shared, where he recalled seeing everyone being treated like test subjects at that very hospital. The experiments aimed to infuse Cryptoglobin into ordinary people, but most attempts failed, with Mrs. Kirifuji's subjects consistently suffering from violent rejection symptoms.

//Now that Nozomi herself is experiencing those same symptoms, which in itself confirms she was one of the experimental subjects in her mother’s trials. Though she did say before that she was one of her mother's experiments, and now we finally have context for that line.

//The very power that lets her fight is also what’s slowly killing her. This is why she’s always been hesitant to use Hemoanima in battle, though the demands of fighting the Invaders eventually forced her to draw upon it, and triggered her condition.

//Worse still, Nozomi admits she doesn’t know whether the rest of the group was born with Cryptoglobin or had it successfully implanted by another, more advanced experimenter. As far as she knew, she was the last surviving subject, meaning Takumi and the others' origins, and the truth of their abilities, are still largely a mystery.

//We get a lot more information about how Nozomi fits into this dychotomy of plot dumps later, but there are other things to cover here.

//Unfortunately, there’s no known medication that can effectively treat Nozomi’s rejection symptoms, or at least, none that’s currently available to us. However, there was one method she and her mother previously experimented with that showed temporary success.

//One of Cryptoglobin’s more disturbing traits is its cannibalistic nature. It has the ability to absorb other Cryptoglobin to increase its own power. Essentially, the blood strengthens itself by consuming more of its kind.

//Takumi quickly connects the dots, as this is basically what we've been doing to the enemy Commanders every time we beat them. We absorb their Hemoanima, or rather their Cryptoglobin, and they end up as blackened mummies as a result.

//So we've been unintentionally harnessing this cannibalistic feature of Cryptoglobin the entire time, absorbing the blood of fallen enemies to enhance our own power.

//However, this also comes with a chilling confirmation that the enemy Invaders ALSO possess Cryptoglobin. Which suggests a direct connection between the Invaders and the experiments that created the Special Defense Unit.

//However, Nozomi can’t shed any light on this connection, since her mother never mentioned anything about Invaders during her research, leaving this piece of the puzzle frustratingly unresolved.

//My personal theory at the moment is that all of us are secretly part of the Invader's species ourselves, or that we're at least a cross-breed between regular humans and Invaders. The latter theory would explain why we transform into uniforms, while the Invaders turn into giant monsters.

//Returning to Nozomi’s treatment, in one of their more desperate trials, her mother injected her with additional Cryptoglobin in an attempt to force-feed her blood with more of its own kind.

//The result caused the rejection to stop, at least temporarily. The theory is that her blood, when given more Cryptoglobin, stabilized by absorbing and integrating it into itself. It wasn’t a cure, but it worked, for a time.

//This is enough for Takumi though, and he comes up with a plan. If absorbing a Commanders Cryptoglobin will stop Nozomi's symptoms, then the only choice is to take her with us to the enemy base when we raid it, hoping to find and fight one of them, then have Nozomi get the killing blow on it.

//As it turns out, Nozomi isn't the only one coming with us either.

//After Nozomi declared she would be joining the vanguard, Kurara had Kyoshika tag along with us to serve as Nozomi's bodyguard and protect her.

//Which I am MORE than happy about because Kyoshika is at least a solid 40% of DPS on this squad. She's constantly heralded as one of the best units in the game when it comes to damage dealing, and I can indeed confirm this to be the case.

//Takumi, Nozomi, Eito, Takemaru, Shouma, Kako, and Kyoshika board the bus and head out toward the enemy fortress, ready for what could be their most critical mission yet. Once we arrive, our next big battle ensues.

//The operation kicks off with a unique challenge that we haven't actually seen yet. The goal is to eliminate all visible enemies in a SINGLE TURN using strategically placed explosives scattered throughout the battlefield.

//Basically the closest we get to a stealth mission in this kind of game.

//Also, because she's still suffering from her rejection symptoms, Nozomi enters the battle already slowed and slightly injured. Which is not good for her, because Nozomi has very little health to begin with.

//Also, at this point in time, I was wondering that if Nozomi was having a rough time with her ailments, why she didn't just use her healing abilities to get rid of them, lol? She literally cures every stat condition in the game, including stun!

//Then again, the hemoanima abilities themselves are what's causing it, so I wouldn't be surprised if it didn't work.

//Once the "stealth" section ends, the real battle begins. The team unleashes everything they’ve got.

//What follows is a grueling boss fight against a surprisingly menacing enemy commander. The commander pushes them hard, but thanks to smart team coordination and relentless stacking of damage thanks to Last Yell, we eventually overwhelm him.

//Seriously dude, Last Yell makes this game SO EASY! I sometimes worry about using it because it just means the battles aren't a challenge anymore.

//Nozomi lands the finishing blow—her first time dealing the final strike to a commander. And thankfully, absorbing the Commander's power does the trick, and her rejection symptoms vanish. It’s not a permanent fix, but for now, it buys her more time.

//In more unfortunate news, Ima doesn't appear to be in the base after all; but OF COURSE HE'S NOT! It was stupid to even assume that things were gonna work out and we were just gonna get him back that easily.

DAY 73:

//The search for Ima lasts all night, but there's still no sign of him.

//Fortunately, we don't return empty handed!

//UNfortunately...we don't return empty handed.

//Eito finds a mummified corpse drained of it's Cryptoglobin inside a small room of the base. A very unexpected surprise, but fortunately, it's not Ima's body.

//But it IS apparently the body of the Invader Commander with purple hair that we captured!

//STOP KILLING THE HOT GIRLS!!!!!

//Sorry! I'm a little MAAAD!

//Well, there goes my potential 16th party member. I wonder how this might change on the other routes honestly, because her having a character icon on the map CANNOT have been a coincidence.

//Eito claims that another enemy commader must have done this to her, but is confident that Ima isn't dead yet, otherwise we would have found his corpse here too.

//Everyone seems to agree, but...did they already forget what happened to Moko? Why is nobody coming to the conclusion that they're going to invaderize Ima just like they did with her?

//I mean, later on they say that the ability the Commander used to copy Moko was an ability unique to it, but that doesn't mean they can't do similarly terrible things to him.

//And we do actually see that later, but...spoilers. Anyway, in the meantime, we've got no choice but to hea back to the school, which has been fine in our absence thankfully.

//One other thing I want to mention here is that Shouma goes into a bit more detail about why he felt such a kindred spirit for the enemy Commander, and treated her so nicely.

//Shouma acknowledges that, yes, the enemy commander was technically our...well...ENEMY. But that doesn’t stop him from feeling genuine sympathy for her.

//While she was held captive, he remembers hearing her cry through the night, as if she desperately wanted to return home. It struck a chord with him, and he started to wonder if she had something, or someone, waiting for her, just like all of us do.

//He reflects on how everyone in the group continues to fight because they’re driven by the hope of returning to someone they care about at the TRC. Whether it's family, friends, or the life they had before, they’re all fighting for the same reason. To protect what matters to them. Shouma believed the Invader might have shared that same longing. He dared to hope that beneath her alien nature, she had something relateable.

//Kyoshika, however, coldly dismisses the idea. She insists the Invaders aren’t human in any sense and therefore can’t feel things like longing, grief, or love. Clearly still very hung up over how they treated Moko, which is more than fair.

//But Shouma pushes back. If the Invader was truly devoid of emotion or self-preservation, why did she surrender in the first place? Why cry? Why beg for life?

//That kind of desperation, he argues, doesn’t come from programming. It comes from a WANT to survive, and to return to something meaningful. He had hoped that if he could bridge the gap, learn her language, and understand her thoughts, he could uncover the truth behind her actions and perhaps find common ground.

//But now that she’s gone, that fragile possibility is lost. Her death has left him full of conflicted emotions. He didn’t just want to spare an enemy—he wanted to understand her. And now, he never will.

//Like...I LOVE Shouma in this scene. And there's never been any point more where I've just wanted to give the guy a hug!

//What he's saying is correct, and entirely fair, and yet everyone is coldly dismissing it (or at least Kyoshika is) like a bunch of warmongers. And he seems to be the only one with any genuine empathy or understanding that this war appears different to both sides.

//He understands that we are the bad guys to the Invaders just as much as the Invaders are bad guy's to us. And yet in the end, he himself is so self-loathing that he settles on himself being the one in the wrong.

//It's just painful, man. I feel so much for Shouma in this whole situation, just as much as I do for poor Kako. I know this is an impossibility at this point, but I wish Shouma would find it in him to put himself first for once.

DAY 74:

//MORE LORE YIPPEE!

//Before we get into that, there's a few things to mention.

//First off, is Yugamu the only smart one here? Why is HE of all characters the one bringing up all the points I make?

//A couple days of him missing, and his disappearance literally happened the DAY AFTER we found otu Moko was an Imposter, and yet Yugamu is somehow still the first person to bring up the possibility that they might somehow screw with Ima, or make him an enemy or some shit!

//Granted, he does specify in this scene that they couldn't use Ima the same way they used Moko because he's pretty sure only one Invader, the one we already killed, had the power to copy our abilities. But that doesn't mean none of the other Invaders have abilities that are SIMILAR. Or at least similarly fucked up.

//On a lighter note, I notice that Takemaru has been crying a lot in these scenes recently, and it's funny that every time, he always comes up with a different excuse as to why he's crying.

//But yeah, that aside, Nozomi suddenly asks Takumi if she can come by his room later, and when she does, she finally gives us a lot more context on the story she fed us before about her condition. Not so much on the war itself unfortunately, but more of an explanation as to why she's here and how.

//First of all, as we kind of got hinted at before, unlike the rest of the group, who were recruited or forced into joining Last Defense Academy, Nozomi enrolled willingly. And she had two deeply personal reasons for doing so. First, to carry on the dream she shared with her mother, and also to seek revenge for her mother's tragic fate.

//Her father had died in a car accident when she was very young, and her mother, though loving, was almost never home due to her demanding work (which is the same case for Karua as we know.) But when her mother WAS around, she would confide in young Nozomi, sharing details of her research like they were secret stories meant only for the two of them.

//These intimate talks became the only real connection Nozomi had with her mother. Through them, she learned about the devastation caused by World Death, the truth of the Tokyo Residential Complex being a subterranean shelter, and the grim reality that humanity’s days were numbered unless drastic action was taken.

//Nozomi basically knew all of this stuff even before Nigou told the Second-to-last Defense Academy group, and before they told the rest of us.

//At the time, Nozomi didn’t understand the full implications. She just saw her mother as a hero, someone working tirelessly behind the scenes to save the world. But as she got older, those bedtime stories started to take on a darker tone. She began to grasp the depth of her mother’s desperation and the ethical gray area of her research.

//Her mother devoted everything to the project: her time, her health, and eventually her relationship with her daughter. Her life's mission was to unlock the potential of Cryptoglobin to make humans capable of wielding its power.

//But when her experiments began to repeatedly fail, and management cut off further testing, her mother made a fateful decision. When Nozomi was in the upper grades of elementary school, her mother sat her down and asked Nozomi to become her test subject. Not out of malice or cold ambition, but out of desperation and love twisted by purpose.

//Shockingly, Nozomi agreed. At the time, she felt proud to be useful, proud to help her mother’s dream come true, and above all, glad that this meant they’d get to spend more time together. She admits that she was essentially brainwashed, convinced by her mother’s idealism and her own desire to matter.

//On a day when the hospital staff were off-duty, Nozomi accompanied her mother to the lab, and they attempted a transfusion of Cryptoglobin into Nozomi’s own body. Her mother clearly struggled with the ethics of experimenting on her own daughter, but Nozomi, young and naive, didn’t see the problem at the time. In fact, she remembered those days fondly, not for the pain or danger, but for the rare moments she got to be with her mother.

//However, the procedure didn’t work. As the experiments went on, Nozomi began to show increasingly severe rejection symptoms, and her health started to deteriorate. Despite the setbacks, her mother continued to push forward, until everything came crashing down.

//Just as Nozomi entered high school, her mother took her own life.

//She left behind a note containing fragments of her remaining research and final thoughts. According to the note, Cryptoglobin was meant to be humanity’s salvation, and a tool to fight back against what her mother referred to as "the enemies of mankind".

//Enemies we can now assume are the Invaders.

//She believed that if she could create stable Cryptoglobin carriers, those people could stop World Death and ensure humanity’s survival.

//But despite her years of work and personal sacrifices, the higher-ups abruptly shut down her research. They never explained why. No final review. No closure. Just silence. After pouring everything into her mission, and risking even her daughter’s life to complete it, Nozomi’s mother found herself abandoned and discarded. It BROKE her.

//Nozomi wasn’t just heartbroken when she found out. She was just furious at the cold, uncaring system that chewed up her mother and spat her out.

//After her mother’s suicide, Nozomi couldn’t just move on. Grief gave way to obsession, and she found herself repeatedly sneaking into Kamukura General Hospital, desperate for answers. She wanted to understand why the administration had suddenly cut off her mother’s research, and why the project that had consumed her mother’s life was so abruptly shut down.

//During these covert visits, she discovered files and restricted data revealing the existence of a newly-formed Special Defense Unit composed of teenagers who possessed the power of Cryptoglobin.

//I.e. Takumi and the others.

//Whether they were born with it naturally or someone had succeeded where her mother failed didn’t matter. What mattered to Nozomi was the grim realization that she and her mother were no longer needed. The project had gone forward…just without them.

//Digging deeper, Nozomi learned that the mission of these Cryptoglobin-powered teenagers was to destroy the enemies of humanity and, ultimately, save the human race. Exactly the goal her mother had spoken of with so much passion and hope.

//But then, a thought occurred to her: what if she could continue that dream herself? What if, by joining the Special Defense Unit, she could prove her mother’s work had been worth something after all? Maybe then the people who had shut her down and effectively killed her would be forced to recognize her contributions. Maybe Nozomi could redeem her mother’s legacy.

//On her final trip to the hospital, fate presented an opportunity. While sneaking through a restricted area, Nozomi stumbled upon what we currently believe to be a transport chamber housing Takumi and the others, unconscious and sealed in pods, clearly being prepared for deployment.

//Without hesitating, she climbed into one of the empty pods and hid. The next thing she knew, she had arrived at the Second-to-last Defense Academy, alongside Kurara, Yugamu, Moko, and Kyoshika.

//However, Nozomi chose to keep everything she had learned, and everything she had done, to herself, with Takumi being the first and only person she confided in about this. She felt that the others were angry about being dragged into this war, forced to fight without their consent as humanity’s final defense.

//If they found out that Nozomi had entered this world willingly, knowing what it meant, they might see her as complicit in the system that enslaved them. Worse, if they learned her mother had been one of the researchers responsible for the Cryptoglobin program, they might suspect her of being involved in the conspiracy itself.

//Nozomi didn’t want to risk being ostracized, especially not after everything she had gone through just to be there. But at the same time, the deception weighs heavily on her. Every time she sees how broken, afraid, or angry her friends are, she feels the guilt tighten around her.

//I just really like the way they handled this scene. The dialogue is great, the lore is incredible, and the emotions are real. And I'm really hoping it pays off in these final few days.

//One other interesting thing we find out here is that Nozomi has no recollection of the TRC getting attacked by the Invaders. Which is odd, but at the same time, this is the second time we've seen this phenomenon.

//Hiruko claimed she'd been fighting off the Invaders for a long time before she arrived at the school, which is why her stats were so much higher than ours. Yet Takumi and the others never knew about it.

//But this also made me think about another thing that happened MUCH MUCH earlier on in the story, which I kind of didn't pay much attention too at the time, but with that scene of Hiruko and now this one with Nozomi in mind, it takes on a bit of a different meaning, and it's this one:

//At the time, this really does just feel like a mistake Sirei made, because it's not too out of character to him. But when I watched NicoB play this game, he picked up on it, and thought there was more to it than this.

//At the time, I thought he was reading between the lines a little too much. But now, looking back, I'm not so sure.

//Did the fight at the TRC not happen then? That could have very well been a VR simulation or something, since we know we have the tech for it. But then what do our families think happened to us?

//I really have no clue what this plot is setting us up for. I hope the payoff is great when we get closer to Day 100.

DAY 75:

//Another Free Time day today, but there are a couple things to note.

//First of all, Yugamu has been spending a strange amount of time away from the cafeteria in the morning. Hell, for most of the day, he's locked himself up in the bio lab, and I discovered at some other point that I can't even take him out for exploration missions.

//Same for Nozomi, even though she's doing better, because she's locked up in there with him.

//Good news though. I knew today had to be the day it happened, but we finally got more VR missions.

//Albeit only one, and the BP increase is only slightly higher than before, but hey, I'll take it. Especially since it gives me more of a chance to use Ima now that he's...indisposed.

DAY 76:

//I only have one real highlight for today, and it's not really a good one. The breakfast conversation this morning was honestly really awkward.

//Kurara is feeling uneasy about how close Nozomi and Takumi have gotten recently, and she's both confused and upset that Nozomi would be involved with Takumi, whom she still sees as a creep.

//Eito tries to defend Takumi by reminding everyone that he already has Karua back at the Tokyo Residential Complex. However, this backfires when Kurara recalls that Takumi once said Karua and Nozomi resemble each other, leading Kurara and Kyoshika to accuse him of projecting Karua onto Nozomi.

//Meanwhile, Darumi wants us all dead just because we’re "normies."

//Also, I'm stupid, because I didn't realize until this point that Kako and Ima aren't actually high-schoolers yet. They're still both middle-school age, and it wasn't until Kako said so here that I figured that out.

DAY 77:

//Okay, so first of all, before I say anything else about this day...

//How!? How is that already a thing!? Why do you guys know what sunscreen is!? You HAVE NO SUN!

//Can someone actually explain this to me, because this is fucking with my brain! Takumi didn't even know what the MOON was before coming to Last Defense Academy!

//Like, they must have SOME kind of substitute for the sun in the TRC, because Tsubasa and Takemaru wouldn't be that tanned if there wasn't, but even so, is it ever actually explained anywhere? Like in one of the books? Have I missed it?

//Other things of note. For both today and the previous day, Takumi tells everyone that he and Nozomi have become close friends, but every time he does, Nozomi looks a little downtrodden. I guess she's being friendzoned because she thinks Takumi likes Karua?

//Alsom Gaku and Eito are up to something. Which I don't like, for obvious reasons.

//I'm gonna be honest, this day was SHIT. I did NOT have a nice day today.

//Despite knowing it was probably a bad idea, I decided to go exploring today, even without Nozomi at my side. My flame level had increased, unlocking new areas and giving me access to more content, so I figured I’d take advantage of the opportunity.

//Unfortunately, that meant leaning heavily on save scumming just to keep my party alive, and I had to reload more times than I care to admit.

//In the end, it was all for nothing. I gathered a ton of loot and resources, but none of it was remotely useful. I was specifically looking for tech-related items, and somehow walked away with everything BUT that. It was frustrating, exhausting, and honestly kind of demoralizing.

//I finally threw in the towel and decided I won’t be venturing out again until Nozomi is back and available to join me. Without her, the whole thing was a nightmare, and not one I’m eager to repeat anytime soon.

DAY 78:

//Can someone tell me why 78 is a special number? Or is the game just trolling me? Because I am genuinely curious, and it feels like it could be a number of things, yet none of them feel right.

//So yeah, Eito and Gaku apparently set up a special festival in the gym for Kako to enjoy herself at, since she's been super depressed the whole time since Ima went missing, and has just been putting on a brave face the whole time.

//Kudos to Gaku for being a nice guy thinking about others for a change, even if he did screw up the music. But again, I got really nervous with this scene because it feels like Eito and Gaku forgot what happened the last time we gathered everyone together was.

//I'm talking about when we had a barbecue and we woke up two days later to find out all our food had been burnt. What's stopping that from happening again?

//In fact, why HASN'T that happened again? If we lose this batch of food, we're royally screwed! Whoever did it could easily just do it again, even if it took a while.

//Then again, I guess there's more of us to keep track of now, so it's not gonna be that easy. By coincidence, Shouma is the only one who avoided getting drugged last time.

//Kako is cute in this scene as always.

//Honestly, I really don't have much to say about the festival itself. Nothing really happens, we just get to cheer Kako up a little bit.

//The only other meaningful moment during the festival comes when Nozomi opens up and confesses that part of her feels deeply sad. They’ve created something special here, and the thought that they can’t stay like this when the 100 days are up weighs on her.

//Takumi listens and then admits that, for better or worse, being drafted into this war has become one of the most defining chapters of his life. Even though they’ll eventually return home and go their separate ways, he tells Nozomi he genuinely wants to stay connected, to remain friends with everyone, no matter what the future holds.

//I couldn't really focus on all this though because I was shitting myself, waiting for something to happen. But nothing really did. Some of us slept in the hall because we partied all night, but everything was fine-

DAY 79:

//I SPOKE TOOO SOOOOOOOOON!

//We woke up after spending the night sleeping in the gym, only to discover that the school is under attack! The Invaders have broken in, and the alarm didn't even sound!

//We obviously can't fight them off without our Hemoanima, so we need to get to the War Room and grab our Infusers. As Darumi puts it, the game has now shifted genres: it’s basically a stealth game, and our current objective is to make it to the war room without being spotted.

//I'm not gonna lie, this segment is INTENSE! And it genuinely gave me the heebie-jeebies! You can't pause the game, you can't check the map, and the rising heartbeat sound that signals an enemy is nearby does a great job of cranking up the tension. It’s GENUINELY nerve-wracking.

//Thankfully, I managed to get there in one piece. I first I thought that during the festival, someone had fucked with the alarm system while the rest of us were having fun, which means we now have to keep an eye out for enemy attacks ourselves, making things even MORE difficult for us. But thankfully, the alarm system seems fine.

//Turns out the invaders breached the school by tunneling in from underground. There's a huge swarm of them, and only four of us are on the field to begin with—Takumi, Gaku, Kurara, and Kako. Darumi splits off from us to go clean the Invaders that got into the school building out, and to wake up the others who went back to their rooms.

//Soooooo the odds are not in our favor.

//Good on you, Kyoshika!

//We also get another transformation sequence here, this time from Eito’s perspective, which we've already gotten once before, and I wasn't expecting to see it again honestly.

//This actually made me wonder if there's a possible route or alternate storyline where Eito becomes the main protagonist instead of Takumi. The way the scene plays out definitely plants that seed in my head.

//The good news is the rest of the squad shows up not long after, though I didn’t even realize Yugamu was missing at the beginning of the fight. That tells you how chaotic everything was.

//Also, CHRIST, this battle is NO JOKE! Even spamming the everloving fuck out of Last Yell to persist through the rounds, it’s surprisingly tough and drags on longer than expected, lasting for 5 rounds, which is the longest any of these fights have been so far.

//But when the invader commander shows up, and the situation gets even worse, because...

//WUUUH-OOOOH! Who could have seen THIIIS COMMIIIING!?

//Yeah, it seems to have somehow absorbed Ima into itself, which is… unfortunate. To make things even more difficult, hitting the commander directly causes damage to Ima, so we’re forced to hold back until we can come up with a strategy that doesn’t hurt him.

//Kako is getting absolutely steamrolled by the narrative, just like how Nozomi was. She's been depressed for basically this entire chapter, and everything’s coming at us so hard and fast, and the game isn’t pulling any punches.

//Yeah, I alrea kind of said it, but this was, without a doubt, the most hectic, chaotic and overwhelming boss battle we’ve faced so far. The first three rounds were tough enough on their own, but things went off the rails in round four when both Takemaru and Kyoshika were suddenly absorbed by the damn thing, just like Ima.

//Then, FINALLY, Yugamu makes his entrance. Turns out, the entire time he was missing, he’d been developing a bioweapon specifically engineered using the commander's DNA. It’s designed to target Commanders only, which means we could potentially use it to neutralize the enemy without harming our absorbed teammates.

//In a shocking twist, Nozomi is the one who ends up delivering the poison. She sacrifices herself, allowing herself to be absorbed by the commander in order to get the bioweapon into its system.

//To be honest though, I was a little confused on first watch of this scene, and I would appreciate some clarification. I actually thought Nozomi had taken the poison HERSELF and used her own body as a vector. I’m still not 100% sure, since that part is kind of ambiguous. Maybe she was just holding the poison when she got grabbed, or maybe it was all part of her plan.

//Also, despite the buildup, the actual climax of the fight was oddly...anticlimactic...

//Mostly because Last Yell is so fucking busted, it ended things quickly once the setup was in place.

//I decided to let Kako land the final blow; after everything she’s been through, it felt right to give her that moment of closure.

//Still, I have to say, the BP reward for this fight was seriously underwhelming. Five full rounds of combat and all the emotional carnage, and we end up getting like...2000 something?

//Unfortunately, the victory is bittersweet. We managed to defend the school and survive a seemingly hopeless battle, but the aftermath is rough. Takemaru and Kyoshika are a little woozy, but ultimately fine after getting free.

//Ima, on the other hand, has been inside the commander too long. His DNA had begun fusing with the creature’s, and while Yugamu’s bioweapon did its job, it worked too well. It targeted Ima as well because of the genetic overlap.

//Ima himself is, SOMEHOW, still alive, but he's indefinitely comatose, and his body is slowly decaying. Because his DNA has been screwed with, we can't bring him back with the Revive-O-Matic either.

//Unfortunately, because none of us are really doctors, nor can we properly heal (WHY DOES NOZOMI NOT USE HER FUCKING HEALING CANNON ON HIM TO FIX HIM OH MY GOD-) our only real option at this point is for Yugamu to do some Robocop shit on him to "Bring him back." in VERY BIG quotation marks.

//Surprisingly, Kako is okay with Yugamu doing this with her brother's corpse.

//Kako makes it clear that as long as there's even the slightest chance to save Ima, she's willing to take it, no matter the cost. She tells Yugamu that she doesn't care what Ima ends up looking like, whether he comes back scarred, altered, or inhuman. If the alternative is letting him die, then it’s worth trying anything. Death, to her, is the only truly irreversible outcome.

//Yugamu, however, to his credit, doesn’t sugarcoat the risks. He warns her that even in the best-case scenario, Ima won’t be able to return to his original form. His body, and possibly his mind, will be permanently changed. And in the worst-case scenario, he could end up as a twisted, mindless creature, unable to speak or recognize anyone.

//But for Kako, even that is preferable to complete loss. A flicker of life, no matter how broken or altered, is still something. It’s still him, in some form. She says she’s willing to take that risk, and shoulder the consequences.

//If, when it’s all over, Ima wakes up and feels horrified by what he’s become, and if he begs for an end, Kako promises she’ll be the one to do it. She won’t let anyone else bear that burden.

//She even adds that, knowing Ima, he’d much rather die by her hand than be killed by the Invaders. And honestly? She’s definitely right about that.

DAY 80:

//Yugamu takes Ima into his "care" and starts modifying him into a new body. We'll have to wait and see exactly how that stuff turns out.

//Nozomi explains during breakfast why she chose to deliver Yugamu’s poison herself, because she mentioned previously that "only she could do it."

//Yugamu mentioned that his poison works by attacking specific cells in the Invader's bodies, but Nozomi suspects that that cell is Cryptoglobin. That means the poison could be deadly to the entire team as well, and we even see it when Takemaru and Kyoshika get out from beign absorbed. They fall sick for a little while.

//Since Nozomi's Cryptoglobin behaves differently in her system, she took the risk, as she figured she had the best chance of surviving long enough to make sure the poison reached the commander without putting the others in danger.

//Free Time came around, and I chose to stop here for today.

Conclusion:

//It was late when I stopped playing. I'd already crammed in hours for this part of the story, and I didn't want it to end! I was so hyped to see what would come next, but I HAD to STOP!

//This game, as I've said before, is so addicting. I loved everything that happened in this part of the story, particularly the fights, which were among the more extreme we've had so far, and the lore dumps surrounding Nozomi, and why we're actually here.

//My takeaways:

Kako has very quickly joined Nozomi and Kurara in the best girl's squad. She was handled really well in this part of the story, and I'm having tons of fun with her. She's so cool and cute.

This arc fixed a few of the problems I had with the twins and their arc earlier on in the story, even though Ima isn't physically present for most of it.

Yugamu got some chances to shine in this part of the story. I love Yugamu, and I think he's really interesting, but the problem is he hasn't been given much of a chance to shine on his own just yet. Not even now. I feel like there's a lot more to him; we just haven't seen it.

The fights are super intense now, and I love it, but at the same time, Last Yell is making them a little too easy in the final parts.

I feel like all the characters are at a point in the story where I like them all a lot, with no real problems with any of them.

This part made me feel bad for both Kako and Shouma; the latter over the loss of the prisoner and his genuine reasons for feeling sympathy for her. I hope in other routes, we have a chance to save her and make him happy.

//Anyway, that's all I've got for now. I love this game. To no surprise. I'm having so much fun as we get closer to the end of this route. Stay tuned for more!

-Mod

#mod #the hundred line last defense academy #the hundred line #last defense academy #takumi sumino #kako tsukumo #nozomi kirifuji #eito aotsuki #takemaru yakushiji #darumi amemiya #gaku maruko #tsubasa kawana #kurara oosuzuki #yugamu omokage #kyoshika magadori #shouma ginzaki #ima tsukumo #journal #review

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