#......aUGH.. do you understand my vision??

[im-smart-i-swear]

heres some doodles of The Funky Guys TM from yesterday!

i havent really had the energy to really finish any larger piece for WEEKS so doodles are all youre gonna get for now.....

you KNOW im rotating that purple fucker(eenek) in my head when i can only draw them sobbing and angry and scared and frustrated over and over again :) 

MAN ive been thinkin about ‘em recently....... uhhh im gonna put some stuff about eeneks’s upbringing under the cut if anyone wants to read it(its a mess of paragraphs i didnt use when answering an ask lol so its propably not very good:/ its just some of my thoughts on een and galra as a whole)

okay so eenek is... how do i put this... fixated on the idea of the galran empire that they grew up surrounded by. they have this idealised view of how the world works and lets just say 'clones of the black paladin helping a galran and being overall nice people' doesnt really fit in there...

(btw for this au's sake lets assume an average galran lifespan is roughly similiar to humans or slightly longer, cause its way more interesting that way imo)

zarkon was the emperor for 10 000 years. ten thousand. thats generations upon generations of galrans raised in a culture of violence and hate and a sense of superiority. like..... thats fucked up right?? thats insane? after so many generations, can you even separate galran culture from the war itself?

so Eenek grew up surrounded by propaganda and war, convinced the galran empire is the best thing to ever happen to the universe. their life was relatively normal(or as close as you could get) until they were the galran equivalent of around eight. death somewhere in space or ‘in the trenches’ was propably a common occurance - sometimes it would be a friend's parent or a distant relative or some other person just distant enough to be bearable... until it wasnt.

i dont know yet if it was a parent or a sibling, but either way - they were gone. Eenek just lost a loved one, and it hit them hard. BUT instead of starting to question if the conquest was really worth all the grief, they just sunk in deeper. beacuse it has to be worth it, right? all the pain and death wasnt, couldnt be for nothing, their loved one didnt die in a pointless conflict right?? right???

and so Eenek decides to dedicate their life to the galran empire(at like. 8 years old..)

 its calm for a couple years after that(though they slowly drift away from their dad(who is actually secretly forging documents and helping escaped prisoners&deserters flee the empire but shhhhh eenek doesnt know that)) and theN QUIZNKING VOLTRON APPEARS and its all downhill from there :)

(damn the more i think about them the more i realise they really ARE like a chihuahua)

[the-way-astray]

i must be the only (kind of) unironic aldella shipper in this entire fandom . . .

[mamawasatesttube]

Janet lives au my beloved, I love the difference in the Janet lives vs the Jack lives au :)

Happy holidays! :D

thanks, happy holidays to you too!!!

also aughgh right??? there is so much to ponder wrt janet our collective beloved janet... i think often about this. like. his issues with jack would both shrink and grow because on the one hand jack is no longer actively around to do shit to feed into tim's many complexes. on the other hand, he now has jack up on the Perfect Dad pedestal in his mind because he's dead. can't criticize your dead dad that's fucked up and horrible. right?

and on the other hand. man. so lets posit he has a better relationship with janet than he would with jack (because janet is a better parent than jack, and let's be real, that isn't really a high bar. but given jack's... everything, i just kinda really get the vibe that he left most of the actual parenting to janet). now at first you'd think this is solely a good thing! ...but can you imagine how much more agonized tim is about having to lie to his beloved mommy???? all the time??? he's even more torn between The Mission and his filial piety this time around!!! augh!!!

like all those times jack didnt notice tim hiding bruises with makeup ? if janet's around it is sooo possible that tim steals HER makeup for this specifically at least once and She. Notices. deeply possible that she puts together "tim showing up with mysterious injuries he keeps trying to hide and also lying to me about it" with "tim getting closer with dick grayson and bruce wayne while i was away" and deduces that she doesn't know WHAT they've gotten her little baby boy into, but she IS going to kill those guys. tim keeps insisting that they're very nice to him but that really isn't helping anything. but just the entire concept of janet actually paying attention to tim's injuries - noticing if he steals her makeup!!! - or paying attention to things like. *checks notes* one of his classmates being SHOT DEAD at their SCHOOL ???? hey jack how did you not even check on him once after this. whats wrong with you. i just wanna talk jack

so i think she'd find out tim's robin way faster than jack. he probably would agonize about wanting her to know but The Mission and the need for secrecy, etc. but notably, when she finds out, i don't think she'd force him to quit - she'd really really want him to, because this is so dangerous and he's her baby and she doesn't want him to get hurt!!! but if he pushed back and tried to explain his side of it, she'd actually be willing to at least hear him out (unlike jack).

but also. not to be predictable but. i think it would be really funny if at some point during this drama kon-el shows up on the front doorstep looking for robin, and eavesdrops just enough to understand that janet knows now. because. hear me out. this is how we once again arrive at tim walking into his own house and home and just balking because kon is at the kitchen table hanging out with his mother. mom why the heck are you giving superboy my oreos!!!!

(also, calling back a little to the concept of baby kon somehow befriending janet, but. very specific vision in my mind of "janet lives past identity crisis too au" where at some point baby kon mentions to tim in her earshot that hes never had a mom and wonders whats it like?? and she doesnt say anything but this strikes her to the heart. several years down the line when timkon are established at some point she's like conner sweetie i know a long time back you said you don't have a mother, and i understand that completely and don't mean to try and take any place in your life you don't want me in, but if you ever would like to have a mother-in-law… and tim is just like. MOM. ARE YOU TRYING TO PROPOSE TO KON FOR ME??? THIS IS SO CRINGE. UGH MOM STOP)

[southparkhcsocs]

I NEED ANGST

Stans gang + butters with an S/O whose like severely injured and in the hospital?

I fucking love angst but I don't know if I did this justice! Sorry I didn't do butters I just don't know how to write him with in anything that isn't fluff!!

Accident

Stan Marsh

He was at home when he got the call. Just playing on his xbox, lounging on the couch. Then his phone rings, "Bebe?" Weird. Why would she be calling

"hello?"

"Stan, oh my god.. we- I'm so sorry! Y/N! They were in an accident!" Bebe voice was breaking with panic and sobs.

Stan sat up, leaning on his knees. "...what?"

"they're in hospital, Stan. I'm so sorry!"

Stans body went cold. "A-are they okay?"

Bebe whimpers through the phone. "I don't know.."

He runs out of the house. Picking up his car keys and running to his car. His hands are shaking and is really wishing he put a new battery in his key fob so he didn't have to fuck about with trying to put the key into the door. He speeds to the hospital, running amber lights. His vision getting blurry with tears. All he can see is your happy face. And that though of any harm to you is killing him. He needs you to be okay.

Once he gets to the hospital he doesn't get out of the car. He just sits there, gripping the wheel tightly. "Just do it. Stop being a pussy. They need you!" He tells himself. He watches as people leave and enter the hospital. But he just sits. Terrified. Not knowing if you're dead or alive. But too scared to leave. What if you die? He doesn't want his last memory of you to be all broken and covered in medical equipment. He sobs alone in his car. Fighting his fear to try and see you. But he can't.

Kyle Broflovski

Kyle's at work at the time. He didn't answer when you called. He's at work, you know he doesn't like being on his phone at work. And then another call. And another. When he answered he was annoyed. And god does he regret it because nothing could of prepared him.

"Hello? What is it? I'm at work." He answered sharply.

"hello, is this Mr. Kyle Broflovski?" An unfamiliar voice. Kyle checked his phone, he didn't even notice is was an unknown number.

"this is he." He replied, now thinking this was a scam.

"I'm calling to inform that Y/N L/N has been involved in a serious accident. Now they are in a stable condition but I would suggest you come in."

"i- what?!? What happened!?" Kyle stood at his desk picking up his car keys.

"this might be something to discuss in person rather other the phone." Kyle hung up. He practically ran to his bosses office and explained. Luckily his boss was a good guy and very understanding.

Kyle ran out of the office building to his car. Luckily for Kyle, he knew the fastest route as he's had a few trips to the hospital for illnesses.

He practically jumped out of his car when he arrived at the hospital. Running to the reception desk. "Hi, what ro-" he's stopped by a finger to his face. The receptionist sat there open mouth chewing her gum. She was slowly typing on her keyboard. It felt like hours had passed by the time she looked up at him and spoke. "Who are you visiting?" Her voice dull. "Y/N L/N." "2nd floor. Ward 6." Kyle didn't even wait for her to finish her sentence before running to the elevator. He pushed the button. Then he pushed it again. "Augh, this is taking too long!" He said to himself before running towards the stairs. Dude was missing steps as he ran to the second floor.

He burst through the doors to the second floor and looked around for a sign pointing to ward 6. Once he found it he charged in that direction. He caught a nurse as he arrived. "Y/N L/N? A-are they here? I'm their boyfriend. Can I see them?" He asked frantically. "Room 264." Kyle ran again, avoiding people and carts. He arrived at you room, hand shaking as he reached for the handle. He entered the room. Seeing you there, covered in wires and tubes. He pulled the visitor chair closer to your bed. You'd looks so peaceful if it weren't for all the medical equipment around you. He took your hand in his, planting a kiss on your knuckles. He stayed by your side. Everyday.

Kenny McCormick

I'm exhausted

Kenny was actually on his way to your work to surprise you with lunch he promised you a couple months ago. When he arrived he couldn't find you. He tracked down one of your co-workers. "Uh, hi, do you know where is Y/N is?" "Oh, uh, they've been taken to hospital. I don't know the details. Sorry." Kenny stood there frozen. He took a breath. "They're fine. I'm sure they're fine." He thought. He left you work and headed to the hospital. It started with a stroll. But the more he thought... "Probably something silly." "Why didn't they call me." "They're fine." "They're fine." He was sprinting before he even realised. Kenny of course knows the hospital well. He runs into the building up to the reception desk. "Y/N L/N, where?" "They're in emergency, you'll have to wait." Kenny scrunched up his face and dashed to the emergency ward ignoring the yells to stop. Luckily a nurse was leaving the ward so he managed to get to the door before it shut and locked. "Y/N? Y/N?!" He runs through the busy ward and finds you. "No, no, no, no..." "Sir, you can't be here." Said a doctor. "No! Y/N!" "Someone get him outta here!" "Y/N!!! Y/N!!!" He yelled as he got pulled away by security.

Eric Cartman

Eric was sat at home at the time. He was getting pissed, you were meant to be at his house way over an hour ago. And you're not answering your texts?! "What the hell, Y/N!" He growled. Then he remembered, you have your snap location on! "Bitch, thinks they can avoid me." And that's when he sees you're at the hospital. "Wha.." he raised an eyebrow at this. Now he tried calling you. It rang out and that's when panic set it. He didn't want to care. But god damnit! "Probably just... Something dumb. Dumbass just AUGH!" He pushes himself off the couch and heads out. "You're gonna get it, Y/N. I'm gonna kick your ass." He says to himself as he gets in his car. He doesn't rush. Why would he? You're probably just being dramatic as always. He arrives at the hospital. It's pretty busy. He walks up to a nurse who's running about. "You know where -" "I'm sorry sir, you'll have to take a seat! There's been a serious accident." The nurse runs off. "Rude." He tried getting the attention of another nurse or doctor but nothing. A big accident must of happened. But there's no way his s/o was involved. They're careful. They're... They're fine. Eyes wide, sweat drops form on his forehead. He grabs the arm of a passing doctor. "Y/N L/N. Are they here?" He asked. He wasn't going to let go until he got his answer. "Are you family?" "Yes." He lied. "We managed to stabilise them. Follow me I'll take you to them." The doctor speed walked and Cartman quickly followed. "They're in here. I've got to go. I'll be back." The doctor then ran off. Eric pulled the privacy curtain back and there you were. God, he could kill you for doing this to him. Unconscious, covered in wires, tubes coming out of your mouth. Why would you do this to him? He takes your delicate hand in his. "You better get better... Please..."

[waywardstation]

alright here we go...

I've brought together the basic outline of my idea... and since I said I share it here I am!

I really hope you like it and it is something interesting for you! I had a lot of fun fleshing out these ideas so it's alright.

~-~-~-~-~

Like it is established in your thoughts Warden Ingo is like an empty husk of who he used to be, torn away from his old life, his memories and from Emmet. I've added to this idea that there is a link between certain humans and Reshiram + Zekrom at all times. Aside the fact these humans have a high tendency of leaning into truth/ideals there isn't much else but it gives the dragons some kind of balance and ties to the people of Unova. Kyurem being "just" the husk has no such tie to the people, though it longs for one.

Ingos ties to Zekrom has been severed when he arrived in Hisui and as there already is a human tie in this time on top of being a shadow of his former self it has become a once in a lifetime moment for Kyurem to have a human tie as well.

Kyurem feels Ingo's presence all the way in Hisui and eventually seizes the opportunity to form a human tie with him. But things go horribly wrong and Ingo ends up being in a half frozen state. Never feeling truly warm; the few things his heart remembers from his old life keeping his core just warm enough.

With ice leaking out of him and an incident where he almost hurts (or does hurt) someone(not sure who), he steps down as a Warden and Instructor at the Dojo and decides to hide in one of the many ice caves in the Icelands, so he can no longer be a danger to the people. After all safety of others comes first, no matter what.

Enter Akari who just refuses to leave Ingo to his own misery and is determined to help him out of this no matter how. And no matter what it takes.

(I've also thought of the idea that since Ingo's tie with Zekrom has been severed it affects present Unova as well. With Zekrom being restless + causing random thunderstorms all over Unova. I can see N seeking out the Pokemon trying to find out what's wrong. Not sure though how much Emmet will be involved, I can see him being affected by the severed tie as well as Reshiram, not sure how at this moment though... Especially since Emmet isn't even aware of his tie... just that something is horribly wrong beside that Ingo is missing.)

~-~-~-~-~

and there you have it.

Its really just a rough outline, I think it will get better over time and sound less "rough"...

also excuse any mistakes. There are times I feel the face english isn't my native tongue come through and this might be one...

Hope you like it! Take all the time you need to reply! I am a bit nervous but I'm sure I'll be fine!

In regards to this post

OHHHH OH THIS IS SO COOL I LOVE THIS CONCEPT!! Kyurem wanting a connection with someone but it can’t in its empty state, augh… ;n;

MAN. I could certainly see how this tie would be severed especially if Ingo was placed into a different timeline when this happened (a timeline where he already exists and is fine in the present/hasn’t been sent back yet?). Putting something into a timeline separate from the Zekrom he’s connecting to, and into a timeline where a “him” already exists and is connected to that timeline’s zekrom would leave him without a connection at all. (WHEW THATS CONFUSING but I see your vision and ITS VERY VERY GOOD)

Especially if Ingo doesn’t know exactly what’s going on with this persistent cold and this feeling of connection, I could see why he’d want to separate himself from a situation. Even if it wasn’t a terribly bad incident, don’t give things a chance to do something worse, especially if you don’t understand what you’re dealing with.

I AM GLAD TO HEAR AT LEAST AKARI IS THERE TO HELP WHEN HE TRIES TO WITHDRAW. They will figure out what’s going on together!!!

I love the thought of Zekrom becoming restless. A tie was severed!! I doubt either of them have ever dealt with a situation like that and even know what a severed tie feels like. And the thought of N trying to figure things out and talk to the dragons as well… SO GOOD.

WHAT A GOOD OUTLINE, FRIEND!! I’m so glad you shared it, I enjoy this concept a lot and would love to hear additions you make to it as time goes on!! Thank you for sharing!!

[girlashfur]

augh. it sucks being disabled sometimes. especially when that disability directly interferes with what you want to do in life.

i've wanted to be an artist ever since i was four. and i've wanted to be an animator ever since i was six. i've been trying for years, but...my eyes don't agree with me on this. my vision is deteriorating the more i get old, and my art is constantly going downhill. most days i look at my drawings and feel nothing but emptiness because even if i feel proud of what i've made, it's just a reminder of the skill i'm actively losing, and how there will be a day where i won't be able to see good enough to draw like that ever again.

it's part of why i don't post alot of art i make on here, even if i do draw fairly often, because it's just. not good enough for me, or for anyone. like....the drawings i make become more and more "abstract" and hard for anyone to understand the more my vision gets worse, and the more i live, the more frequent that becomes. some days it just doesn't feel like it's worth trying any more to be honest

[bitwynn]

Playlist Clips

These are just short snippets inbetween the main fics and action, like those 4komas in mangas. Although the entire Playlist series is literally just (mostly) snippets inbetween the main action of running for your life away from the "fire nation". Also, yes its not lost on me that the entire thing is VERY similar to ATLA because, while they are running for their lives, a lot of the eps are very chill lol

Blue for Barbara, Yellow/Gold for Zhongli, Green for Wanderer, red for Diluc, Italics is Reader/General, Combined is Everyone. Colors only used for singing parts.

---

"No, no, no-- you don't just move your hand down, you're drawing a heart! Like-- half of one. Here, like this."

Barbara takes a step back, as you demonstrate. You hum as you dance, getting to the mentioned dance move.

"...I wanna know, know, know, know,"

"What is love!"

And with a swish of your hand, Barbara nods in understanding. "See? Just like that." After a moment of silence, she nods to herself.

"What if I do a little something like this?"

She does the move, drawing a half heart in the heart. But as she does so, hydro energy trails after her finger and actually drawing the heart in the air.

"Oh my god Barbara, that's actually perfect!"

She giggles as she waves away the energy into a mist of twinkling stars. "Its all thanks to you, really. I couldn't have become such a wonderful idol and Vision holder without you!"

"Awh, you're too sweet Barbs."

You could almost see the sweat drop form as she says these next words. "Although, I'd preferably become a better idol without the threat of death everywhere we go." "Gomen."

---

You were hauled over Diluc’s shoulder, as you two were running from the Treasure Hoarders you encountered while picking fruits. Wanderer was providing cover as Diluc ran, dark slashes of wind trailing down on the enemy.

But, you really needed these Hoarders off your tail and running while Wanderer wildly blasts air at them won't really do much. Diluc knows this as well, as he tightens his grip on you and puts on his game face.

"Hold on."

And as you scramble to find a good grip, Diluc skids to a stop-- practically drifting as he turns to face them. They couldn't know what was coming for them as Diluc suddenly showers them in a rain of throwing knives. All that was left to do was for Wanderer to finish them off. With a great leap, he jumps onto a tree and starts running on errant branches to reach camp.

Diluc sighs as he hears you start to giggle in his ear. "What is it this time?"

"Na na na na na na na, naaa na na na na na na, BATMAN!"

He sighs again, a smile forming on his face. No matter how much he denies it, he can see the comparison.

---

"Augh, Archons! Even babies can speak better Inazuman than you!" Wanderer was fuming as you sat with him near the fire. "The i in 'sekai' is silent, and its not pronounced like a bird caw, you imbecile!"

You wilt in your seat. "Man, I was just introducing you to a song!"

"Well, the song is in Inazuman! You think I'd just shut up here and listen to your screeching as you butcher my language?!"

Sheepish, you poke your fingers together. "Jeez, I was right to introduce you to this song..."

He raises an eyebrow. "And why is that?"

Looking away, a wry smile blooms on your face. "Because you really are the 'ichiban ohimesama'..."

"I'm going to strangle you now." "Fair."

---

He finds you in the dead of night, tears rolling down your face. He sits beside you, pressing a warm, tiny cup of tea into your hands. You curl up tighter in your balled up position, leeching off as much warmth as you can from your tea.

Zhongli's shoulder presses beside yours as he takes in a breath.

"Leaves from the vine, falling so slow,"

This pries a short laugh out of you, wet and harsh. A small, sad smile graces his lips.

"Like fragile tiny shells, drifting in the foam,"

You sniffle, wiping away some of your tears. "This'll only make me feel worse y'know?"

He hums. "I've found that... the catharsis in the reminiscing of old memories is much better than stewing in your grief." Zhongli looks down into his steaming tea. "Life must go on, even if we're without them."

You take a sip of the tea he brought you. "Do you ever stop missing them?" It's chamomile.

"No."

"Will it ever stop hurting?"

"The pain will fade."

You look at him, tears having dried on your face. "Then... I guess we'll be okay."

[cheemken]

Y'know what,, have some lil hcs abt Regulus and An-An bc I saw art abt them and y'all don't know how quick I get attached to crack ships and rare pairs

Anyways

•Horror movie marathons w the gfs, do you see my vision when I say Regulus canNOT handle horror movies, girl fucking hates it lmfao

-An-An tho? Loves them, has posters of her fave horror movies in her room that's why Regulus always insists they'd hang out in her own room instead of An-An's

-real tho, An-An purposely picks the movies w jumpscares in it bc she knows Regulus would cling to her when she gets scared. Bonus points she'd end up teasing her how weak she was w horror movies lmfaooo

•joyrides

-pls, Regulus is an absolute speed demon w her lil vespa, it's honestly surprising how fast it could go. An-An is the only one who can really tolerate and handle the fact Regulus has no concept of a speed limit

-but also it's cute bc it's also the same art that got me to ship them here look

-also it'd be fun if Regulus drives her to the haunted sites An-An discovered. She wouldn't join ghost hunting tho, girl would cry fr edit: y'know the more I think abt it, I think An-An wouldn't let her join sometimes bc she knows Regulus would have beef w the ghosts lmfao

•Regulus would ask An-An if she'd still love her if she was a worm, SHE WOULD

-i have this concept that Regulus pulled in Schneider and Sonetto on that, just a lil prank y'know, to see if their partners would say yes or not

-surprisingly enough, only Matilda passed the vibe check lmfaooo

-Vertin walking down the hall after Schneider kicked her out and saw An-An on her knees banging at the door of Regulus' room going "Reggie, baby, I'm sorry! I swear I'll still love you if you were a worm!"

-guess Vertin isn't the only one sleeping on the couch tonight

•attention whore Regulus is so real and dear to me you don't understand, like An-An working on her blog? Hah, best bet Regulus will sit on her lap till she has her full attention

-sometimes just to fuck w her, An-An wouldn't even look at her lmfao, she thinks it's cute when Regulus gets all pouty

•An-An saw Regulus try out her red/green shades* once and she hasn't recovered since, her girl was so cute in her shades holy shit

-she let's Regulus wear it more often

•imagine APPLe giving An-An the shovel talk tho😭

-just this tiny floating apple trying to act tough and serious to a person ten times his size lmfao

-but also him crying bc augh his daughter is growing up and now she has a gf and she's gonna leave the nest soon and he starts bawling

-An-An had to calm him down

•this makes me wanna write abt them now ough,,

[iwritenarrativesandstuff]

Trimax Thoughts Vol. 12 Pt. 1

Stream of consciousness thoughts. There are only three volumes left and I am scared. :)

There's NINE CHAPTERS??? HUH? Ok I'm breaking this up then. I'll do half here and half on another post.

Livio on the front cover. My good lad. :) I can't believe how much I like him; it took me no time at all.

So Chronica has already faced "many fused entities". What is happening on Earth??? There's so many questions I have about the Plants there. In the interim though, I'll just say Domina is so cute.

Depression. :(

The Fall. July. Fifth Moon. That bitter expression. And then he looks up and thinks of all the people he knows. Because that's what it's always been about, hasn't it? Friends, allies, and enemies alike. AUGH

Sorry Milly's so cute here and I needed a screenshot. <3

OH GOD. WHY. WHY. I turn the page to that. Wolfwood's grave given the same page space as Rem. Are you for real here. His grave too, like not even his face. The past he tries so desperately to keep alive and the future he was forced to bury. FUCK OFF. STOP. What the hell. I can't do this man.

Oh this goes so hard.

Chronica and Domina's dynamic is super cute... but it makes me wonder what kind of crap Chronica has had to deal with to make her resort to such a strong offensive so quickly. I doubt the dependent Plants are going to like that at all.

KNIVES TELEPORTED? WHAT.

So, is Domina another Independent? Her hair is darker but not black... for some reason I thought Independents were all blond hehe

Knives why are you giving Domina visions.

AUGH WTF WTF! Ok up until now I was chill about the body horror but HOLY SHIT. DOMINA NOOOOO (she's fine, right? she'll be fine???)

So. Vash's bullets are cool. From what I understand they're cancelling things out? So did he sever the thread binding Domina...? Does that mean she's ok...?

His hair looks even darker...

"You're a hard man to understand." <- What a thing to think about your own brother. Your twin, no less. They've grown so far apart.

Knives is apparently really powerful for an Independent. But we know Vash is even more powerful than that. Really kind of. Terrifying.

"I know... that you've just decided to kill me." This plus the image of them as kids is a fucking gut punch.

...covering your own face this time, are you Knives?

Vash choosing to face Knives as a "simple gunman" instead of as an all-powerful being. Just hits hard.

They spent 80 years together after the Big Fall??? WHAT? They still look so baby though...

"I knew I couldn't leave him. It was that thought that made me keep him at arm's length." "Even though I saved you?" "You only fell for their lies because you're so gullible." <-YIKES.

I hate it. I hate it. He looks so baby. He's a traumatized kid and panels like this are a slap in the face.

He cut off his arm and then just left him chained up??? KNIVES WHAT THE HELL DUDE.

"We don't belong in the future of this planet." VASH NO.

THIS IS. A WHOLE LOT. Be back later.

[fictionkinfessions]

Theres this god damn quiz results screenshot that constantly floats around as a meme for a 'which character are you quiz' of my kin, Razor, and it makes me so mad.

"Youre probably 5 idk how you got here bc you cant even read"

Fuck you quiz maker and FUCK anyone in the fandom who constantly rags on my struggles with education or infantalizes me for them.

I know in my main tl this wasnt even an issue bc au wee but I do still have a more canon complacent timeline and GOD.

I WAS NEARLY AN ADULT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS TO LEARN TO READ AND WRITE AND SPEAK AT 18-20?? Sure learning a new language is one thing, but learning to do it aT ALL is a whole other.

For fucks sake Im not STUPID Im not a BABY. Im doing something NONE of you could even fucking DREAM of.

And god dont get me started on the double standard between me and Collei! She can ALSO canotically barely read but because she can speak full sentences clearly SHES not stupid but I AM? Even when I state. In canon. That I speak the way I do because talking is EXHAUSTING. Implying I COULD speak full complete sentences if I wanted and CHOOSE NOT TO TO CONSERVE SOCIAL ENERGY???

I hate that I even have to bring her up bc she was my best friend and I dont want her to feel bad so plz any Colleis reading this is NOT your fault. We're struggling together.

Just. Fuck man. Im already not that popular and while nobody out there really HATES me, most people see me as this little stupid baby who cant do anything at all ever and will always be stupid and will never ever read or speak correctly and AUGH.

I wish I could shove my main timeline in everyones face and go "LOOK AT WHAT I COULD HAVE BEEN IF VARKA WASNT A PIECE OF SHIT. I WAS THE SMARTEST KID IN MONDSTADT. THE AKADEMIYA BEGGED ME TO JOIN THEM. CANON HAD TO FUCKING NERF ME BECAUSE ID BE TOO POWERFUL BEING RAISED BY LISA."

Im STILL smart in canon, I canotically picked up rudamentary speech from just listening to Varka talk during the years he visited. I learned to fight without even understanding most of what Varka was telling me. I SPEAK WOLF. FLUENTLY. I picked up vision techniques from Lisa in barely a year of her training me! I may not know a lot in canon, but Im learning VERY quickly and I WISH PEOPLE WOULD SEE THAT.

~Razor🕯♟️ (GenshinImpact)

c

[diodellet]

hiya dio!! tossing in 3 (honkai star rail? 👀), 5, and 15!!

hiya ian! thanks for shooting me an ask!!

3.) Go to the [honkai star rail] tag and reblog some art you like that has under 100 notes

aight i gotchu oomfie, ill search for stuff to queue up 😤😤

5.) What genre do you like reading the best?

angst and hurt/comfort 🔛🔝!!!

it's painful, it's good, and it makes emotional processing so much easier and less burdensome because the difficulty goes into finding an okay sentence and stringing together ok-ish dialogue (but at least those can be solved with a banger ass playlist, ykw?)

augh special mention to one of my formative twst fics i love that grim has such a big role in this

15.) Worst fanfic tropes ever?

NOO!!!! U CANT MAKE ME SAY BAD THINGS ABT FANFIC!!! ALL FANFIC IS GOOD WHEN IT IS MADE WITH HEART!!!

(did i say bridal carry? ill just say it again for funsies HAHAHA i dont like bridal carries, it doesn't spark any joy, please just carry me like this🤧👇👇)

i'm usually really open-minded with reading fanfics... so aside from the obvious fanfic writing sins (using generative AI, plagiarism, not doing enough careful research for sensitive topics) OH WAIT--

(this is probably specific to genshin/hyv) but i Reaaaaally don't like it when fandom infantilizes characters that use the teenage model. like, there is such a thing as short adults! (me. i am one of them!) one time i saw someone say that lynette was probably a year younger than lyney and i was confused bcs aren't they twins??? like, are we forgetting that lynette was the primary "errand-goer" for the house of hearth upon getting her vision? girlie's probably seen more shit than lyney did.

^^semi-related to infantilizing characters, i dont like how some obm fics treat luke as a literal toddler. like, yes he's immature but he's got a good head on his shoulders and even if he's a low-ranked angel he probably has sm powers that he can make use of to protect MC. and i esp see how he gets left out even in gen/platonic fics and hcs. smtimes i feel compelled to look at the game's shitty pop quiz events for fanfic fuel (i mean, the luke tag has more ppl saying not to sexualize him than actual writing and that bugs me ://)

There used to be this really good obm fanfic (Nightmare by StarsEncrusted) and it had a plot point of helping luke get his wings, but it++the author's orig account got deleted from ao3. thankfully some fans had the foresight to archive it, so heres a wayback link to the fic and the accompanying side stories

i guess to expound more on my aversion to marriage in fanfic, it icks me when the characterization stops feeling like the characters themselves and the fic starts feeling heteronormative (also sometimes the writing comes across as if the marriage/childbirth "fixes" all those issues, which, it doesn't) and, well, i already kind of deal with the idea of "getting settled down" shoved in my face. it's really not for me. but i do understand why it's comforting to people, smtimes i can indulge in reading in it. but on a bad day, nah, i can't.

anyway, also special shout out to chat fics, they can be fun but idk it reads to me as a way to regurgitate overused incorrect quotes. (please some vines need to be laid to rest. also, can we stop quoting that one copaganda show oh my god)

(art appreciation ask questions, please bug me to rb some underrated fic and art)

[anendtopursuit]

here's some questions spam!

what do you think is the best joke in tgwdlm? which nightmare time episode is the strongest? would you vibe with any of the lords in black? opinion on webby? favorite character introduced in black friday? some people have said that the youtube version of nerdy prudes must die gets fanservice-y with its hatchetverse references - what're your thoughts? which hatchetverse couple is the most transgender in your eyes?

here ends the question spam

YEAAAA QUESTION SPAM I LOVE QUESTION SPAM!!! my laptop is currently updating and therefore i feel no shame doing this instead of my dissertation LET'S GOOO

best joke in tgwdlm? - augh, a hard one. idk if it's the BEST but i always lose it at the hivemind breaking out of unison and having to stop and find their notes/re-harmonise after not your seed (i've been there... SO many times)

strongest nightmare time episode - ok this is the part where i admit i am VERY behind on nightmare time and have only seen a few in random orders - my favourite of the ones i've seen is abstinence camp, though. i think it's a rlly strong, relatively self-contained story, and ofc i'm always down for a friday the 13th parody lmao. boy jerry and girl jeri are my little freaks and i love them (and ofc peter and steph my beloveds)

vibing with the lords in black? - i love all of them an unreasonable amount and would LOVE to hang out, honestly. i never stop singing so pokey would probably be fun company, and wiggly won my heart immediately since i LOVE possessed/evil toys (if the url wasn't a dead giveaway for that) and green is one of my fav colours. but honestly any of them!!! they're deliciously evil and i would love to chill (and then regret it when i inevitably face their torment BUT THAT'S A PROBLEM FOR FUTURE ME!)

opinion on webby - i haven't seen a ton of her but i think she's really cool, both conceptually and in the execution i have seen! i love how the visions she gives hannah are contextualised and start making sense slowly as you work through the show (which it took me AGES to figure out, admittedly, because i'm either eerily good or absolutely terrible at recalling dialogue, and fsr her prophecies always fell through my brain like a sieve)

favourite character introduced in black friday - i'm disqualifying wiggly bc we've established i love him already - honestly, it's a tie between linda monroe (one word: MOTHER) and ethan green (aka the sweetest motherfucker in hatchetfield, holy shit). i find both of their characters super compelling and also i'm very bisexual about both of them so !!!

were the npmd hatchetverse references fanservicey? - i mean... yeah? i don't super mind though, fanservice isn't inherently a bad thing. i do wish there was some way to watch a pro shot of the show as it was on stage instead (i Lost My Mind when i found out the gerald part was originally my favourite little freak boy jerry), but i've heard through the grapevine that there's apparently a way to get your hands on a digital ticket recording as a bonus feature or smthn similar, which is good enough for me. so whilst i do think they came on a little strong in some sections (particularly hatchet town), overall i didn't mind - the smaller call-backs don't really harm the show at all if you don't get them (e.g. richie's joke abt peter looking like the homeless guy downtown is still a funny jab without the knowledge of who exactly that homeless guy is and how he's related to peter) and for fans who have been waiting for years, it's an extra little reward. i've seen some people be incentivised to watch the previous shows so they'd understand the audience's reaction to certain lines, too, so there's that. tl;dr it is a LITTLE much sometimes but i don't personally mind it and thought they were all fun

most transgender hatchetfield couple - oh you are SPEAKING MY LANGUAGE, i LOVE transgenderifying characters. i think lautski (peter/steph) feel very explicitly-queer gen z t4t, if that makes any sense, but i wouldn't be me if i didn't at least mention my quietly-queer first loves paulkins (paul/emma). they're like the chill trans elders (as in the community title, not in reference to their age lmao they're like 30) to lautski's spitfire trans youth. if that makes literally ANY sense

my laptop has great timing and has now finished updating (!!!) so i must return to the trenches of university coursework but this was VERY fun thank u

[pleuvoire]

i've been meaning to ask for a while.. what are some of your favorite kamen rider fics? i've been looking for good recomendations and i trust your taste

unfortunately i don't have as many recs as you might expect because i'm highly picky and i don't read kamen rider fic all that much 😔 i kinda lost the habit because i feel like a lot of people in the tag have a different vision than i do. but let me dig a few up that i remember

first though to get this out of the way. i do in fact recommend my own fics. hi. here's all my kamen rider fics if you haven't checked them out already. at the risk of sounding conceited, i think they are really good. do let me know if you enjoy them as i love feedback

other general author recs! ihasa is prose/description goals to me, and i love their kuuga stuff in particular. bladebrave, parad, and realxeyez are all my friends who have written some great stuff and i will always hype up their excellent character takes. now for more specific fics. bolded are my favorites

impressions by estelraca - an interesting crossover take on how tsukasa lost his memories. ft lots of godai and ichijou which makes me happy because i love them :) a bit confusing in places but i liked it a lot

hanging tree by rainbowfootsteps - this is by my friend rain and was inspired by a wip snippet i posted which makes me very happy. a gloomy look at how a previous round of the rider battle might have ended

what do you call a male femme fatale? by chancellorxofxtrash - written for me for the toku holiday exchange and i was delighted to receive it. kirihiko/shoutarou fake dating

the other kind of yummy by laylah (explicit) - the most "yeah, that is exactly how it would go down" take on ankheiji having sex i've ever seen. foundational text to me

my madly-blooming feelings by shoceted - literally just now discovered this one going into the gouchase tag to retrieve another fic to add to this post (see below) AUGH IT'S SO GOOD. gouchase hanahaki disease. GOD THIS AUTHOR GETS IT. THEY GET IT

sick by oneatatime - makoala sickfic, pre-canon. pretty short but made me think "wow, this author really gets these characters" and more than that made me feel like i had a much deeper and better picture of their relationship, which is quite the feat

NOW HERE'S THE THING... a lot of the best kamen rider fics i've read are in chinese. i don't speak chinese past the beginner level but i've found deepl does the trick well enough to understand it. if you are also interested in reading chinese fics through deepl or another machine translator, here are a few more...

羚羊有一百条命 (antelopes have 100 lives) by ephedrine - satosano psychological horror and probably my favorite ryuki fic

run wolf run by liliamt - yuutaku high school au but takumi... is a werewolf o_O short but sweet

20th century boy by acetylcholine - overview of a year with ren and shinji. the prose in this is so, so gorgeous even with machine translate. some other equally beautiful works of theirs i like include special needs (yuutaku lesbians au), insomnia (heartbreaking faiz angst), it (kenhaji shape of water au), and like father like daughter (bittersweet kenhaji angst, and was a big part of the inspiration for my fic in the gaps of sunlight)

生活碎片 by fireworkinstar - post-canon gouchase that ends in them eloping. it's adorable

ok it's late and i'm getting sleepy. huh that is more recs than i expected to have. if i remember or discover any more i will add to this post, making this has inspired me to go digging for more fics and also actually read more of the many many chinese rider fics on ao3. goodnight

[connoreatspussy]

Hi I just finished binging your fic doctor the problems in my heart and I’m obsessed I’m going to have a heart attack. Adore the way you mortalize sampo w those bittersweet hints of insanity and those bells dinging in tune to the screws loose in his head. And yet he loves!! He loves so hard so clumsily he breaks he hurts Gepard and then he hurts himself in an effort to fix it. The fact that the part focusing on what’s hunting Gepard is written in sampos pov while vice versa will be with gepards pov… so scary so genius. And the fact that the first part has sampo so able to contact and communicate w Gepard while we start part 2 with sampo missing?? I’m losing it. Ahhhh I’m in love thanks so much for writing such a delight to read!!!! I’m so insanely excited for whatever comes next I know it’s going to rock all out shit collectively

ANONNNNN HHHFGNG FVDJ . YOUGOT ME BLUSHKGN HOLY FUCK!!!!

You get it YOU GET IT u understand my Vision w sampo like hes a fucked up dude and yet he Loves!!!! He loves geppie SO MUCH!!! He loves gepard in such a messy unsure clumsy way he loves him to the point of hurting himself its!!!!! OAUGH. and ya YA like part 1 is how sampo confronts the monster that hurt gepard and part 2 will be the inverse of gepard trying so fucking hard to confront those whove hurt sampo and A. HFBFVDDG

God GOD im so glad u dig it it makes me so fucking happy. And also

Yea YEA DIVINITY AU IS ME TOO BEKADBDH. i need to do more for divinity au it is so. AUGH. A

[twiggyart6]

collecting short funny things to write under fanart of characters you really love

please feel free to add more thank you :3

(this is long as shit be prepared)

ough

looking at them

my friend :)

mwehehe

augh

I can't believe this

brain blasted

what a little freak

do you even care

be so fucking for real

your kidding

what a weirdo

a wonderous creature

consider this

from my personal collection

what the

I'm so normal

I'm not normal

why are they like that

evil swag

TEEHEE

I'm gonna frow up

yeah this is pretty cool

pretty fucked up dog

have you seen this?

my beautiful princess

I'm ill

oh good heavens!

my son. he has every disease

this shit aint nothin to me man

I laurve them

yoink

just a little bit. as a treat

tell them to stop

me when I GET you

MY GUY

the psychic worm (wohwohwohwohw)

good lord

cuteness aggression towards them

what the fuck ever

im feeling something

sigh

me when the

GRRAAAHH

im fucking serious

love it when they appear

its becoming unhealthy

go white boy go!

your never gonna believe this

worst guy ive ever seen

their just so ... drawable

sorry guys

i saw it in a dream

she is very gorgeous to me!

i see them when i close my eyes

my little scrungle

be so fucking for real

i can do whatever i want

bitch

yeah

my baby girl

my little kitty meow meow

they've done something to me

i gotta get outa here

yep

my favorite white man

dude!?

full of joy a whimsy

going cray cray!

well....

erm

heyy gurl wasup

she is beuty she is grace

aaaaanything could happen

just like me fr

its time

yahoo!

divine retribution

yay!!

so was foretold in the prophecy

their so ... woah

yessir

god. fucking. damn.

they understand me

you are not immune to propaganda

Explodes character with mind

Forgive me

I would tell them my most depraved thoughts

for the win!

my treasure my beloved

awesome

oh yeah woo yeah

thats it thats the post

this above all else

-INHALE-

had to get it out of my system

you absolute baby buffoon

but make it epic

dont question it

gay baby jail

mwah <3

i want to make them into bread

no guys you don't get it

i got nervous

every fuckin time man

[puts face in hands and groans loudly]

no way

DONT DO THIS TO MEEEEE

take a deep breath

stupid little bow wow

cringeposting once again

abandon society, embrace insanity

god has let me draw another day

had to do it

changed my brain chemistry

so the thing is-

im going to make you so girlfail

pathetic wet cat

guys.

their neat idk

or something like that

ATTENTION!!

i have the disease and its terminal

shrimply amazing!

hits you with the beam

smile :)

send help

oh hi didn't see you there

no i will not elaborate

the creature is demonic in nature

i think there's something wrong with them

i think there's something wrong with me

its fine

woah woah woah

do you even realize what you've done

very cool

do you see my vision

whatever the fuck this is called

the strugler

interesting..

oh i got you dont worry

nobody move

character on the brain always and forever

#1 hater

funny you should say that

nature is healing

imagine a guy. now imagine them again

ooo mama

get drawn idiot

get obsessed over idiot

if only they were real

post this character instantly

your honor i need them

ive got some notes

A juicy morsel

I want to push them down the stairs

They wouldn’t dare

(Eyes wide and mouth frothing) yeah!

my beautiful wife <3

[death-and-other-myths]

Blue Lily, Lily Blue Deadass Book Review

By Maggie Stievfater

This is an unhinged book review/recap of Blue Lily, Lily Blue and shits about to get WIERD AS HELL for Blue and her 4 private school dude friends. AUGH!!

*SPOILERS AHEAD*

This book opens with Adam and Persephone standing on a mountain in the billowing wind doing cool psychic shit, like being able to turn and stand on the leyline and know exactly where it is. She asks Adam what he sees, he closes his eyes. She has to keep reminding him to look outside, not inside. Inside are painful memories and present anxieties. He thinks of the shattered glass things on Gansey’s mansion floor. But when he focuses, he sees 3 sleeping things that need to be woken up. Persephone sees them too, but says no.. it’s 2. One of them shouldn’t be woken up. 

So it’s been a month since Maura disappeared, leaving only a cryptic note. “Glendower is underground and so am I.” — Blue is being strong, but she can’t help but feel a little abandoned. Like we all know Maura went down there looking for Artemis. 

Luckily, we check in on Maura and she’s fine. Time doesn’t exist in the cave. So to her it feels like it’s been a few minutes but it’s really been a month. 

In the meantime, Blue and the boys have been going to hang out at Cabeswater every day. It’s fall, but when they’re there, they wish for it to be summer, so the forest makes it summer. YOU HAVE TO BE SO CAREFUL what you think in this stupid forest. It does nice things like makes the fish change colors, but if you think something like “I could just crawl out of my skin” you will literally be skinned lol. Literal-ass forest. 

There is this really beautiful part where Blue tests out the magic. She thinks of blue lilies and it starts raining blue petals. A petal lands on Gansey’s lips. He sits up and is like “Okay. It’s time.” 

Oh, Noah is there by the way. Hanging out with Matthew who is there visiting Aurora Lynch, who lives in the forest. She’s sweet beyond words. Literally a dream girl. If she leaves Cabeswater, she’ll fall back into a coma. Anyway, Noah and Matthew sit in the car to keep time. Because time moves strangely in Cabeswater.

They enter the cave and tie themselves together on a safety line. Ronan in the back, then Blue, then Adam, all led by our fearless leader, Gansey. Gansey orders Ronan to sing a song, so they can mark time (all of their watches have stopped) — He whistles Irish tunes as they walk. He starts by singing the Murder Squash song, which everyone yells at him about.

Things are going great until Gansey vanishes. Adam is yanked to the ground and manages to hold himself. Ronan grabs Blue tightly. Gansey fell down a FUCKING cave hole and for several terrifying moments, he’s not replying to them. With Adam as a counterweight (poor baby laying on the ground lol) Blue is able to peek over the hole and talk to Gansey — who is… UNDERSTANDABLY having a panic attack as he is free hanging over darkness. 

Again. We’re so used to confident, fearless-leader Gansey, it is fascinating to see him terrified. And this scene is terrifying. 

“There is something on my skin and it is reminding me of …” He trailed off. 

“Water,” Blue suggested. “Or mud. It’s everywhere.”

There was nothing but the sound of his breathing, jagged and afraid. 

Everybody realizes all at once that if they think of hornets, the magic is going to manifest as hornets. Don’t do it. Don’t do it. Then they hear the sound of wings. And thousands of moving things. Turns out it’s hundreds of RAVENS that swarm out of the cave to more ghostly chanting “Make way for the Raven King”. Gansey’s like… okay I’m done being in the pit. I’m coming up now. 

The next day, Adam tries to drive into a national forest to do Cabeswater business. It sends him visions and it’s up to him to figure out what they mean. Tarot cards help. He even lined his sink with tin foil and scryed about it! I love the thought of Adam doing psychic shit. Poor baby though… he’s kind of feeling lonely. He sorted out his anger and that’s doing much better. He even thinks of how scared Gansey sounded in the pit. Like too scared to even pull himself up at first. It reminds him of how he stayed with his abusive father. Fear does strange things to us.

Later, the gang (sans Noah) is crammed in the Camaro on their way to pick up Gansey’s British friend Mallory. They’re speculating as to how to explore that pit some more. Adam is passed out against the window from being magical and doing his 3 jobs probably. Ronan is looking out the window. So we get this ADORABLE SCENE FROM GANSEY AND BLUE.

In the rearview mirror, he caught Blue’s eyes by accident. Strangely enough, he saw his own thoughts reflected in her face: excitement and consternation. Casually, out of view of Ronan, making sure Adam was still sleeping, Gansey dangled his hand between the driver’s seat and the door. Palm up, fingers stretched back to Blue. This was not allowed. He knew it was not allowed, by rules he himself had set. He would not permit himself to play favorites between Adam and Ronan; he and Blue couldn’t play favorites in this way, either. She would not see the gesture, anyway. She would ignore it if she did. His heart hummed. Blue touched his fingertips. Just this — He pinched her fingers lightly, just for a moment, and then he withdrew his hand and put it back on the wheel. His chest felt warm. This was not allowed.

Oh god oh god they like each other so much. He’s supposed to die. She can’t kiss him. Oh god.

They pick up Malory and his 30 suitcases and his dog that has anxiety and cram back in the car. Malory talks about this ancient Glendower tapestry he found under his BARN on a leyline in the UK. And he shows them a photo of it. It has 3 women with red hands on it, and they all have Blue’s face. The camera gets passed around the car and everyone agrees, that’s Blue.

Later that night Blue is ambling about the house. She talks to Persephone about how much she misses her Mom and the consensus is “Maura knows what she’s doing. If she wanted help, she’d ask for it.” — In a funk, Blue calls Gansey. Just to hear his voice. They do that a lot. They have a super brief exchange, a little joke, where she says she dialed the wrong number. And she says she might do it again. He says she shouldn’t, but he hopes she does. 

Adam and Gansey take Malory out to see the leyline. Not Cabeswater, but around the mountains of Virginia trying to find another way into that cave. Adam and Gansey have a sweet moment were Adam tells him “I’m glad we’re not fighting any more.” And Gansey tries not to overdo it with how relieved and happy he is. Then Adam goes on to say “Also, sorry about the whole Blue thing. I realize now how crazy I was to try to date her now that she’s one of us. I mean that would be weird right? Like what was I thinking?” And Gansey’s like “HAHA YEAH HAH WEIRD YEP.”

Blue is in school getting ready to talk to the guidance counselor when Noah shows up! I love this line. He’s so cute.

“I think I miss this part,” he said. “The beginning. This is the beginning, right?” 

“First day,” Blue replied. 

“Oh, yeah.” Noah leaned back and inhaled. “Oh, wait, no, it’s the other one. I forgot. I actually hate this part.”

Well the meeting goes poorly and not just because the guidance counselor is a condescending bitch who basically tells Blue she’s not going to be able to afford getting into any good schools. Things go south when Noah becomes a ghost tornado, throws paper everywhere, then dissapears. 

Blue immediately goes to the factory to look for him, but he’s not there. She peeks in Ronan’s room and sees that freaky mask from the last book. The one Calla said to destroy. It has tire tracks on it. That’s when Gansey and Malory get home. Gansey is so happy to see her there, it’s silly. She accompanies him into the kitchen slash bathroom slash laundry room and they have a sweet moment where she’s trying to act okay when she’s not, and Gansey says “We’ll find her.” And they stand really, heartbreakingly close to one another. 

When they come back into the main room, Malory is like “One of your friends is hiding under the pool table.” (Cool that he can see Noah!) and Blue and Gansey try to talk him into coming out. But he’s crying and REALLY upset. Says he’s just tired of decaying and insists they have no idea how this feels. He starts up another ghost tornado, pulling so much energy off Blue she’s feeling lightheaded. But her mom trained her for moments like this. She knows how to visualize her energy and cut it off. So she pulls the plug on Noah’s energy source before he can hurt her or destroy more things. He’s super sad poor baby and just fades away after that. And Blue feels a little fuzzy when Gansey tells her that was impressive.

That night, a well-dressed douchebag comes to the psychic house. Things are going normally until he shuffles the cards, and pulls a three of swords out of it (the heartbreak card) and is like “So ladies, how do I make this happen?” And you don’t fuck with the cards, so there’s instantly something threatening about him. He asks where the third lady is. The one that looks like Blue. And they’re just like GET OUT. So he STEALS Calla’s three of swords card and leaves. DUDE.

Oh god oh god oh god it’s the first day of school at Aglionby, and despite some truly adorable bits with the 3 boys getting along and Adam thanking his lucky stars that everything is okay between himself and his friends… Maggie drops this bomb on us. Their new Latin teacher is fucking Colin Greenmantle… Mr. Gray’s boss from the last book! AHHHHH!! Nooooo!!! Why are all the Latin teachers evil?? This is like the Defense Against the Dark Arts teaching position in Harry Potter nooooo!!

In the next chapter, we get to know Colin Greenmantle and he’s pretty much awful. So is his wife. They’re renting a farmhouse and while they’re definitely funny and entertaining, they just objectively seem like AWFUL PEOPLE. They’re magical artifact dealers. And have a personal vendetta against Nial Lynch and Colin says he can’t wait to fail Ronan in his class. He kind of reminds me of a man child.

Gansey and Ronan go over to Blue’s house and find the Gray Man play fighting with Calla, or teaching her how to break someone’s wrist. They tell him that their Latin teacher is Greenmantle, and Gray is like… well shit. Okay you kids don’t do anything, I’ll handle it. He tries to warn Ronan that if he does anything stupid, Greenmantle will do something horrific like take one of his brothers’ arms or something. Ronan just storms out. Gansey is sad because his friend is sad, so Blue gives him the fruit at the bottom of her yogurt. That helps a little. 

When Adam gets home from work late, Gansey shows up in his pajamas and an overcoat. He’s there with some kind of excuse about homework, but really he just wanted to chat. Adam realizes something about Gansey is off. He hasn’t really been the same since that moment in the pit. His confidence has faltered. Adam always thought he wanted Gansey to “get a taste of the real world” and experience how scary and unfair it is, but now he’s not so sure. He likes him the way he is. And does what he can to cheer him up in his Adam way. I love this line:

Adam couldn’t remember how they had managed to fight so continuously over the summer. Gansey, his best friend, his stupid and kind and marvelous best friend.

Gansey mentions that when they find Glendower, he wants to wish to bring Noah back to life. Then he heads out. We learn that Adam is hiding a letter with a court date for his father on the shelf. He doesn’t want to tell anyone about it. OH BABYYY!!

Blue gets into a fight with Orla when her cousin basically says “You need to make some actual friends at your actual school and quit hanging out with these rich idiots who are just going to leave you for the Ivy Leagues in a year. Also it’s weird how much you all love each other.” And Blue says “Fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you Hey Gansey.” And they drive off together with Malory and his dog. They knock on the doors of local hillbillies, one of whom, Jesse Dittley, shows them the cave in his back yard that might be connected to the Cabeswater cave. Only he says it’s cursed, so they can never ever explore it. Now they have to decide if they’re going to persuade Jesse or trespass. 

The Gray Man shows up to Greenmantle’s farm house and points a gun at his wife’s head and the guy doesn’t even give a shit. He just eats cheese crackers while he threatens him. Piper (his wife) doesn’t care either. Greenmantle says he’s going to ruin Gray’s life if he doesn’t turn over the Greywaren in 9 days, and Gray said he’ll consider this and just leaves. I’m like COME ON GRAY. Just SHOOT THESE PRICKS like you SHOT YOUR BROTHER. But then we wouldn’t have a book and I do suppose I want to see what random way this book’s villain ends up dying in the end lol.

Adam is working alone at the mechanic shop at night during a thunderstorm when spooky stuff starts happening. At first he thinks it’s Noah, but he figures out pretty quickly that it’s Cabeswater trying to communicate. It doesn’t really know how else to communicate other then fucking scaring the DAYLIGHTS out of him and warping the scenery and showing him dead people. He scrambles to the tarot cards, flips 3 over, and focuses until he figures out what Cabeswater wants. It’s just a crack that needs to be repaired in the leyline. He’s just gotta move some rocks around somewhere. He says cool, I’ll take care of it this week and the room stops warping into nightmare world. Adam is relieved, but jittery, and it certainly doesn’t help when the fucking albino night horror monster shows up, next. 

Adam is crumpled on the ground when Ronan steps in like “Shoo. Go on, get.” — They exchange some sassy words. Ronan thinks school is lame and Adam tells him to go do his homework. Adam is making very conscious efforts not to fight with Gansey or Blue ever again, but he has a comfortable enough relationship with Ronan to know they will still have many fights. Ronan leaves in a huff. But when Adam gets in his car after work, there’s a jar of DREAM LOTION for his chapped hands that have been driving him crazy in his car. “Manibus” it says (Latin?) “For your hands”

AWWWWWWW YOU GUUYYYSSS!!! I think Ronan has a huge crush on Adam’s hands.

Gansey and Malory have a discussion about Glendower and the 3 people sleeping underground and blah blah blah. Okay then Noah shows up hahaha. They have a super cute exchange over this little metallic snowman Noah found in Ronan’s room. And then Gansey tells Noah he’d like to ask Glendower to give him life. Noah is touched by this, but doesn’t seem to believe it’s possible. The whole time they’re talking, Gansey is touching his ear because he thinks he feels hornets there. Noah stops him and blows cold air on his ears, saying “It’s okay. You’re safe. There’s nothing there.”

Because it was Noah and no one else, Gansey could admit, “I don’t know what I’ll do if I find him, Noah. I don’t know what I’ll be if I’m not looking for him. I don’t know the first thing about how to be that person again.” Noah put the clay in Gansey’s hands. 

“That’s exactly how I feel about the idea of being alive again.”

That’s the end of the chapter. AUGH I love these KIDS!! I love how much they love each other! They don’t behave like realistic teenagers AT ALL. They’re too emotionally mature and kind and intelligent hahaha But I love it all the same!!!

Also? I can’t reiterate enough how obvious it is that Gansey’s near-death experience obviously shook him. He’s been obsessed with Glendower ever since then, puzzled by the nagging feeling of “why me? Why was I saved?” — and he literally doesn’t remember who he was before this obsession. Beautiful character building.

Blue gets into a fight with Calla because she’s in an awful mood and misses her Mom so much it’s driving her nuts. Calla reveals that she misses Maura too, but their powers don’t work where Cabeswater is concerned. They can’t see events happening in it for some reason. Blue finds the list of names she made on St. Mark’s Day and takes it outside. She thought that hillbilly sounded familiar. And sure enough, his name is on the list. The Gray man is out there having a beer and I love that he’s like…part of the family now. They have the sweetest conversation and he sees Gansey’s name on the list. He tells her fate could change. Fate is a promise and promises can be broken. And he has a decision to make before Sunday. 

Gansey is laying in bed at night with his phone on his chest, waiting for Blue to call. Hoping she’ll call. (She doesn’t have a cell so he has to hope she’ll creep down to the reading room and also have insomnia like he does). Just as he’s chastising himself for wanting her to call him, she DOES. And they have a severely stupid conversation about ducks lol. But hearing her voice puts him in such a good mood. They hang up and then Ronan bursts in on him in the kitchen/bathroom/laundry room. There’s a cute moment where he tricks Gansey into listening to the murder squash song on his headphones, and after they laugh about that, he’s finally able to feel happy and go to sleep.

The next day at school, a classmate named Henry Cheng asks Gansey to sign his petition to hold an election for student council. Henry seems really sweet and like a good guy. So it sucks that Ronan is mean to him! Bad Ronan! He’s just crazy jealous. Like Orla said, it’s weird how much these kids platonically love each other.

Alright so Gansey is speaking with the principal about something we don’t know yet… so Ronan takes Adam out to the Barns. He shows him what he’s been working on… Which is trying to dream up an object that wakes up the comatose things his father dreamed. He shows Adam his “workshop”, which used to be Nial’s “workshop”, which is really just a dusty tack room with a chair and a blanket in it. Ronan shows Adam a few objects he’s made. One is this weird mirror, shifty, strange thing that Adam can’t look at for more than a second. When he holds it up to a cow, it’s ears twitch but it doesn’t wake up. 

Ronan reveals that the reason he’s so desperate to make an object like this… is because he realized that HE DREAMED MATTHEW. ON ACCIDENT. When he was a child. Declan told him. So he’s terrified that if/when he dies, Matthew will be comatose, and he doesn’t want that. 

This chapter is also RIFE with Ronan/Adam flirting!

As they moved through the old barn, Adam felt Ronan’s eyes glance off him and away, his disinterest practiced but incomplete. Adam wondered if anyone else noticed. Part of him wished they did and immediately felt bad, because it was vanity, really: See, Adam Parrish is wantable, worthy of a crush, not just by anyone, someone like Ronan, who could want Gansey or anyone else and chose Adam for his hungry eyes.

And when looking at the beautiful pictures in the tack room (contrasting Adam’s father’s office, which was all trucks and pin-up girls):

It was so different from what Adam’s father had pinned to his workspace walls that again Adam considered Ronan’s admiration of him. Someone like him treating someone like Adam as someone worthy —

When Adam asks why he keeps driving all the way out here to dream, Ronan answers that sometimes he dreams of wasps. So he can’t try this at Monmouth. Also, he says, he’s dreamt a punch of epipens and hidden them all over the factory and school. WHICH I TOTALLY CAUGHT. There was a line in the previous book when those thugs are going through the drawers, and an epipen spills out. But I’m pretty sure when we first meet Gansey in book 1, it says that his one and only epipen is in the glove box of the Pig. Anyway, I think it’s sweet that Ronan is scattering them all over the place. Gansey’s allergy is so bad, epipens might not even help, but it’s sweet that he wants to try.

Adam asks why he showed him all this. Ronan replies: “I hear if you want magic done, you ask a magician.”

That night, Blue calls and asks Gansey to tell her a story about the leyline. He does. Then afterwards, he feels all floaty again after getting to hear her voice before bed. 

There was nothing inherently guilty about the moment except that Gansey burned with guilt and thrill and desire and the nebulous feeling of being truly known. It was on the inside of him, and the inside was all Noah ever really paid attention to. The other boy wore a knowing expression. 

“Don’t tell the others,” Gansey said. 

“I’m dead,” Noah replied. “Not stupid.”

Meanwhile, Colin and Piper are like… the dumbest villains ever lol. And I don’t mean conceptually, I mean intellectually. Wow I hate these guys!! Good job Maggie! They’re just so shallow and callous with people’s lives and hurtful and SHALLOW. Piper has a little rat dog now. She reveals to Colin that she bought spelunking equipment because she thinks “Gray’s psychic bimbo” is down in the underground leyline caves. Thank goodness they don’t know where those caves are, right??? EEEHHHH NERVOUS.

Blue takes the car back out to Jesse Dittley’s house and Noah tags along. She strikes a deal with this hillbilly giant that if she cleans up his yard, he lets them explore his haunted cave. There’s a cute little montage of Blue (tiny but strong) getting the job done. Jesse says “Good ant” because she reminds him of an ant lol. 

 When her and Noah are planting the flowers, he starts acting weird. He starts chanting “Blue Lily, Lily Blue” and his eyes turn into black sunken craters and he’s being CREEPY AS FUCK and getting up right in her face. Jesse sees what’s happening and shoves a mirror in between them, which makes Noah shrink away and scream and then dissapear. Jesse makes her spaghettios and they talk about the nature of the haunted cave and how his family has almost been making like… sacrifices for generations? Like he knows one day he’ll go into that cave, and be killed by whatever is in there, then his son will have to come collect the bones. Like he did for his father. (UGH right??)

Well then Calla and Gansey burst into the house PISSED OFF because it’s been 6 hours since she took the car, she only has a learner’s permit, and she has no cell phone so no one knew where she was. When they get back to 300 Fox Way, EVERYONE is there (except Noah obvs). Ronan. Adam. The whole gangs there because they were out looking for Blue. Blue explains how she knows Jesse Dittley is going to die (tells them about the corpse road) and ADAM — our sweet, intuitive, intelligent, beautiful boy — catches on fucking immediately that one of their names is on that list. He knows she’s lying. ADAM IS SO FUCKING SMART. So he finds an excuse to pull her aside and is like “Which one of us is it?” And she is quiet at first, but eventually tells him, Gansey. And Adam is crushed. Then he’s like… well I fucking know what favor we’re asking Glendower for, then. 

Alright, Chapter 26 is a DOOZY.

Blue wakes up pissed off. Just pissed at how unfair and difficult everything is. So she calls Gansey and asks her to come get her. He seems kind of in a mood too. Not a bad one, just a real genuine… no more pithy little dialogue. Just raw and…REAL!

This wasn’t the Gansey she’d seen in the kitchen earlier; this was the Gansey she secretly called at night.

They drive around. Hands holding over the clutch. He teaches her how to drive the Camaro haha. THEN THIS HAPPENS:

She pulled over. She had thought it was such a simple thing to avoid kissing someone when she’d been with Adam. Her body had never known what to do. Now it knew. Her mouth didn’t care that it was cursed. She turned to Gansey. 

“Blue,” he warned, but his voice was chaotic. This close, his throat was scented with mint and wool sweater and vinyl car seat, and Gansey, just Gansey. 

She said, “I just want to pretend. I want to pretend that I could.” 

He breathed out. 

What was a kiss without a kiss? It was a tablecloth tugged from beneath a party service. Everything jumbled against everything else in just a few chaotic moments. Fingers in hair, hands cupping necks, mouths dragged on cheeks and chins in dangerous proximity. They stopped, noses mashed against each other in the strange way that closeness required. She could feel his breath in her mouth. 

“Maybe it wouldn’t hurt if I kiss you,” he whispered. “Maybe it’s only if you kiss me.” They both swallowed at the same time, and the spell was broken. 

They both laughed, again at the same time, shakily. “And then we never speak of it again,” Gansey said, mocking himself softly, and Blue was so glad of it, because she had played the words from that night over and over in her mind and wanted to know he had, too. Gently he tucked her hair behind her ears — this was a fool’s errand, because it had never been behind her ears to begin with and wouldn’t stay. But he did it again and again, and then he took out two mint leaves and put one in his mouth and one in hers.

WHEW!!! Fuckiiiin loved that. Well fuck it’s kind of short lived though. On their way home, they come across Henry Cheng whose car is broken down (at like 3am?? Dude.) so he asks to use Gansey’s phone. And his presence kind of breaks the spell of the night. Blue hates how Gansey’s voice changes when he talks to his Aglionby friends. She tells him this. I think she’s so wound up and hurt from wanting and not being able to have… and probably some dumb part of her 17 year old brain wants to spoil it for reasons other than the curse. 

Because she says some hurtful shit. Like “What was I thinking? You and I would never work. We’re from two different worlds.” Gansey is pretty wise though. He can tell there’s another component than this other than her dislike of how his voice changes when he talks to Henry.

“When are you going to tell me what this is really about?” This made her heave a great shuddered breath that was close to tears. “Never.”

AW BABIES!!

Okay so, I read the next chapter last night? And literally had to put the book down. I was like NOPE! TOO SPOOKY! Too late. Too dark. Too scared. This is what happens:

It’s the day the gang goes to explore Dittley’s cursed cave. It’s raining. Gansey feels off. Just like one of those days where nothing goes right. The mood is sour. His favorite sweater is dirty, so he has to wear one he doesn’t like. YOU KNOW. He’s also like… not ready to find Glendower. He’s like the dog that chases the car and doesn’t know what to do once he’s caught it.

But weird shit starts happening as soon as they enter the cave. Adam is like “shut up Ronan, cut it out. Quit singing.” And everyone says “Ummm Adam? No one is singing.” Then CHAINSAW THE BIRD opens her little beak like a record payer and stars “singing” haunting music about “all hail the Raven king. Here he comes lalalala” and then she flies off into the cave. Ronan is like…. “NO MY BABY!” And wants to go chase after her solo but everyone is like hell to the no, Rone this cave is fucking with us. Gansey asks Adam what he thinks, and when Adam touches the cave wall, his EYES TURN BLACK. I think this is something that’s been happening for a while when he does psychic stuff. He thinks they should keep going and the cave is just trying to scare them as a defense mechanism. 

So they keep going until they find like… basically a tomb. Decorated with statues and carvings and raven stuff and it’s like… this is it. This is the tomb of Glendower. They found it and it was THAT EASY — which just totally unsettles Gansey. The whole time he’s thinking… this is nothing like the vision I had in the spirit tree (because he literally saw that moment and this space looks different. The energy is off). They find a tomb with a big heavy lid/statue on it….

They found Chainsaw by the way and she’s fine lol

And here’s where I was like…nope. Too scary. They open the tomb, and it’s not Glendower. It’s a woman with her wrists and ankles bound, laying FACE DOWN, and when they open the impossibly heavy lid, and it falls loudly, HER HEAD SNAPS ALL THE WAY AROUND TO FACE THEM and she crawls out of the box. The way she’s described, she sounds like “The Ring” girl lol all long black stringy hair. And she’s singing the weird Blue Lily, Lily Blue song and laughing. Gansey flips from nervous and uncertain to calm, collected badass in a second. This lady is in her 20’s and is coo coo bananas. Keeps flirting with all the boys. Singing nonsense. They decide they can’t just leave her in the cave, so they take her out OH FUCK GUYS! REALLY???

I have such a bad feeling about this. The psychics said there were 3 sleepers and only 2 should be woken up. The other one they said ABSOLUTELY NOT TO WAKE.

Well they get outside and it’s raining blood and windy, and the sun is out, and there’s a, um… COMET IN THE SKY?? Gansey says that in the texts, there’s mention of a comet on the day Glendower was buried. The lady says she doesn’t like Adam. She calls him a mongrel (which actually really hurts his feelings). And Gansey sets her straight like “Hey we’ve been nothing but nice to you. His name is Adam Parrish and you will address him as such” and she’s like “YES MY LORD”. Turns out she wasn’t even asleep. This witch was buried and has been lying face down for hundreds of years. They take her to Jesse and she admits to haunting his family and killing his ancestors and is like “SORRYYYYY” and then they stuff her in the suburban. Blue has a cute moment with Jesse and says “We broke the curse, so now you can live happily with you family. Please don’t die” and he’s like “GOOD ANT.”

They take her to 300 Fox Way. 

Calla: “Do you remember how I said that there were three sleepers, and Maura’s job was to not wake one of them, and your job was to wake one of the others? Remember how I didn’t say anything about the other one? I did not mean bring her to my kitchen.”

Okay well at least she’s not the BAD sleeper. I was so afraid of this witch lady at first and now I’m calming down. She’s kind of more silly than anything. She says her name is Sorrow but she speaks in poems so I don’t know how true that is. Calla tells Adam and Ronan to go get supplies for her.

Adam and Ronan exchanged a wide-eyed look. Adam’s look said, What does that mean? and Ronan’s said, I don’t care; let’s get out of here before she changes her mind. Gansey frowned after them as they scrambled to the front door.

Fucking love them. Lol I love the imagery of these two SCRAMBLING for the door. I’d be like yeah let’s get away from the lady that can possess ghosts and birds please. Alright so crazy lady says that Artemis is the one who tied her up!! As punishment? When they untie her hands, she spins around and tells Gansey her name is actually Gwenllian. And he’s stunned, because that’s the name of Glendower’s daughter.

Chapter 29 is Adam and Ronan shopping for Gwenllian (wow that’s a pretty name) and I am here for it. “I don’t even know what to get, a kennel?” — Ronan. This whole scene is really adorable. Watching them throw toothbrushes and shampoo and shit in the cart. Like we all know the guys are friends. But I don’t think we’ve seen so many scenes with Ronan and Adam casually hanging out up until now. They see Colin Greenmantle’s wife with a shopping cart full of gardening stuff that looks dangerous. But they decide to drop it and leave the store.

There’s a random scene in the parking lot where Ronan is like GET IN THE CART PARRISH. And they behave like teenaged boys for a minute and ride/slam the cart Jackass style into Ronan’s BMW. This is so cute and spontaneous, I can understand why I’ve seen so much fan art of it lol. Ronan asks Adam to tell him what he’s researched about Greenmantle so he can get to dreaming about it.

Blue has a sweet conversation with Malory where he reveals his therapy Dog is for anxiety. But he doesn’t really have anxiety. He can sense auras. And when he’s around big crowds, it gets overwhelming. He says that Blue has a BLUE aura… the color of psychics. He also tells her about when he first met Gansey, this young squirrelly teenager who blew in one day then left the next without explanation. He tells her about how he kind of still had some PTSD back then… he’d collapse and claw at his face like hornets were there. I mean poor baby had this wild experience of DYING horrifically, then having a ghost…voice…revive him and tell him about Glendower. Or was it Glendower’s voice?? It’s not specified. They talk about Gwenllian being an illegitimate child of Glendower’s and how she might have been buried in a “shill” grave. Like a fake one to throw off grave robbers.

Okay so um, this next chapter. Fuck. Ronan and Adam are hanging out in the St. Agnes church. It’s night time. No one is there. Ronan takes Adam up to the choir pews where the organ is and a statue of Mary with little candles all around her. It’s very romantic, and they behave accordingly, sneaking glances at each other. Catching each other staring. It’s all very sweet. 

So they get to talking about what to do about Greenmantle. And Adam has this plan…. But it’s a nasty plan. The problem is they need to frame this guy for a murder he actually did commit (hiring a hit man to kill Nial Lynch), but doing that is going to be really hard. So Adam has an idea to frame him for a different type of crime. One that is taken VERY SERIOUSLY and is easier to put people away for. Maggie doesn’t go into details here, but I think it has something to do with…. Illegal… children stuff….. Ronan is VERY NOT OKAY WITH THIS. Because he’s the one that has to dream up the “evidence” to plant on this guy. But he understands why it needs to be done. 

He tells Adam “fuck it. I’ll do it now. Leave and I’ll make your stuff.” And Adam is like “I don’t wanna leave. Also brb I gotta go scry/separate my soul from my body for second to talk to my forest and ask Cabeswater to show you what kind of phone Greenmantle has, so you can dream up a copy.” - the fact that Adam can do this, that he knows how to ASTRAL PROJECT by staring at a flickering candle flame, is so cool. I love that he’s magic now. 

Well when Adam comes back from his conversation with the forest, he finds himself staring at a badly beaten, carved up, dying in pain…Ronan. AUGH the description of it is so gruesome. Adam is horrified, and moves to help, but is interrupted by the REAL Ronan perched up on the pew. He explains that he tried to warn Adam. Sometimes his bad dreams come back with him. He didn’t want him to see stuff like this. (I think Adam is white as a ghost at this point) — Like, HOW MANY TIMES HAS RONAN BURIED HIMSELF? How many times has this HAPPENED? He had to dream a double of himself for the monsters to kill, otherwise he would have brought them out with him in the real world. Ronan is pissed at Adam for making him dream this depraved shit… and seeing what I’m sure is something really private (his dream…deaths..) and they say nasty words after Ronan demands Adam leave.

Back in his apartment, Adam takes a long shower. He’s going through a lot… So it doesn’t help AT ALL when his fucking FATHER shows up at his door and pushes his way in. To Adam’s credit, he doesn’t rise to any of the bait that is being put out there. His father is saying this whole court thing is ridiculous and there’s no way he’ll win. He knows the judge. Adam is just crying for attention. Etc. Etc. Adam like… retreats into himself and can feel and smell Cabeswater and the branches growing protectively around him. His body is in that room, but his spirit is somewhere else. When his dad tries to touch him, he gets pricked, and has a thorn sticking out of his hand. Then he leaves. (So cool)

Adam stood there for a long moment. He wiped the heel of his hand over his right eye and cheek, then dried it on his slacks.

AUGH this poor KID!! Fresh off this traumatic event of watching his friend get brutally murdered… he’s got a magic forest talking to him in his head… and now this douche canoe of a father comes and starts shit. Like WOW why can’t Adam have nice things??

So Colin and Piper are in the cave and you want to hate them, but then they do really funny things. Like Piper is such a dingbat. She brought her dog and is picking up poop in a baggie. You almost, ALMOST like them and then Colin says shit like this: “What I’m going to do is hire a billion million minions to come look in caves for this woman, and if that doesn’t work, I’ll just eviscerate her daughter in front of the Gray Man instead.” - AUGH. FUCK YOU DUDE. Piper stops because she hears something, but we never get confirmation as to what. Colin randomly thinks about people sleeping and wanting to wake up one of them (??Cave, what are you doing??). Then they decide to leave. 

Blue sure wishes her mom would come home. Gwenllian is hella weird and exhausting to be around. But she’s getting more likable too. She’s like the house crazy lady now. Stealing everyone’s clothes, talking to trees, and storing things in her hair lol. Gansey keeps showing up to try to get info out of her, but she’s hard to wrangle. Lately everyone has been busy. Adam and Ronan keep running off to do their thing. Noah hasn’t shown up since he freaked out at Jesse’s house. And Gansey has some mysterious after-school commitment he keeps running off to. 

Gray comes over and Gwen is pulling a vacuum around the house like a dog lol She tells him her sad story of hearing about her Dad’s advisor trying to incite war. So she tried to stab him at dinner. She was sentenced to being buried alive after that. Gray tells Blue that Adam and Ronan HIRED him to help with this Greenmantle framing thing. He won’t tell her details but asks about her haunted cave and if she thought it might be a good place to hide bodies. Then he asks her to show him, so she’s like okay!

Sometimes this book just… makes you forget what you’re reading about lol. Blue tells her aunts the hitman is taking her out, so they go on their adventure. 

I love that Jesse and Blue are friends, and I love that he calls her Ant because she reminds him of these tough African ants he saw in a documentary once. Blue and Gray ask to see the cave, and Jesse is like “Sure but I gotta warn you, weird shits been happening lately” and he shows them. And basically these like… MONSTERS are coming out of the cave. Gray shoots one and it has like…3 heads? Blue thought they broke the curse by taking Gwen out of the cave, but Jesse thinks she was holding these monsters back. So. Now that’s a thing. 

ALSO WHAT HAPPENED TO THE COMET AND THE RAINING BLOOD? Did that go away? I suppose so since society isn’t falling apart??

That night, Gwen comes to Blue’s room with a spoonful of mayo lol. I like her random objects. Gwen, in unhinged sing-song, explains that she and Blue are similar. Blue would call herself a battery. Gwen calls them mirrors. Gwen also says— “YOU’RE A WITCH, HARRY!” And Blue is a little excited at the thought of finally having a name, even if it is witch. Gwen shoves Blue to stand between Neeve’s two mirrors, and when’s he looks to her left and right, her reflection vanishes. But she’s still there in the room. So that’s weird. Gwen eats her mayonnaise. I’m sure those mirrors will mean something later!!

Also I’ve decided I love Gray. He’s on the list with the boys, and Blue, and Maura — the list of people I will be heartbroken over if they die. Gansey is at the top.

Colin notices that his wife is acting super weird. She always stares at herself in the mirror, but when he calls her name she doesn’t respond. She’s staring off into space and then kicks him out of the bathroom.

In Chapter 37, Gansey is relishing moments of high school monotony. The happiness of walking in between Ronan and Adam. Watching the crowd part for them. Dew on the grass. Coffee in the air. Normal teenager shit. They run into Henry who is still on his very passionate quest to convince the administration to instate a student council. Gansey goes to get Henry coffee in the teacher’s lounge, which is adorable that he can just WALK in there and take stuff. Then he hears someone shout Adam’s name, followed by a LOUD NOISE.

Gansey spills back into the courtyard to see that some construction workers dropped a bunch of concrete panels, and it’s broken into pieces — fine shards — all over the courtyard. Ronan and Henry are COVERED in dust. Adam is standing eerily in the center of it, perfectly calm, protected by a bubble of air. Like he’s untouched. The grass around him is completely clean. WE LOVE OUR MAGIC BOY!!! Everyone is taking pictures like “omg Adam you’re so lucky!” I love this exchange:

Gansey leaned and Adam pulled him in even closer, gripping his shoulder tightly. Right into Gansey’s ear, he whispered, voice tinged in disbelief, “I didn’t — I just asked — I just thought —” 

“Thought what?” Gansey asked. 

Adam released him. His eyes were on the circle around him. “I thought that. And it happened.” The circle was absolutely perfect: dust without, dustless within. 

“You marvelous creature,” Gansey said.

Thank you for saying what we were all thinking Gans!

Okay so the next day is the court case. Adam is, understandably, a ball of nerves standing in the courtroom. Cabeswater is there with him in spirit. He can feel leaves wrapping around his body that aren’t really there. Adam is really regretting being there alone, now. He misses his friends. He wished he could get over his pride and let them in. THEN GANSEY AND RONAN SHOW UP. Ronan even tucked his shirt in and did his tie correctly. And Gansey strides up to the judge and shakes his hand because he KNOWS THE GUY and asks to be character witnesses. So the Judge is like “I’ll allow this!” — YOU ARE SO FUCKED ROBERT PARRISH. YOU’RE SO FUCKED!!

Adam has this amazing growth moment of realizing Gansey has always seen him as an equal. It was never a charity case. It was just friendship. Like real love for his friends.

Smash cut to a few days later. I guess we don’t get to find out what happened in court yet! But Adam asks Blue if she wants to come along on Cabeswater business. He’s sitting in a gas station wondering if the pulse in his veins is blood or the leyline and Noah shows up and is like “Yeah I wonder the same thing.” — Adam is like….ummmm did you just reply to my thoughts? Noah’s like I dunno.

OMG can we appreciate this scene, where they turn on the radio and the murder squash song comes on… and Adam panicky and ejects the tape. Blue is like HOW? HOW did that make it off the internet??

Noah cackled and showed them the cassette. It boasted a handmade label marked with Ronan’s handwriting: PARRISH’S HONDAYOTA ALONE TIME. The other side was A SHITBOX SING-ALONG.

Ronan dreamed him a mix tape. So fucking cute. 

They get to the forest and a tarot card tells Adam where to head: 3 boulders making something of a natural gazebo. There he scries, and says he’s never done this in front of people before, so he doesn’t know what he looks like. He thinks it’s not happening at first, but realizes pretty quickly that when he talks to Blue, she’s not responding. And his spirit is outside his body. He figures out that some rocks need to be rearranged on the mountain to help the leyline. Cabeswater asks for the Greywarren and Adam is like nah, he’s not here, just me lol. He figures out that there is more than one Cabeswater and he doesn’t know how awake the others are or if they’re connected somehow. I guess there’s a network of magical forests on the leyline. He drifts and drifts and finds himself in a cave with a spooky red door and a woman who seems familiar, but he’s so in spirit-mode he can’t remember her. A man is with her. They tell him to GO. I think this is Maura and Artemis. But we don’t know. 

Anyway there’s a spooky red door that is eerily enchanting. It’s equal parts terrifying and makes you want to open it like you’ve never wanted anything else in your life… but you’re also afraid. Adam gets sucked into this feeling and almost opens the door when Blue and Noah cut his hand and he gets thrown back into his body. They said he just went blank, and quit blinking, then he quit breathing, so they panicked lol. GOOD FRIENDS.

They move some rocks. The leyline is so happy, Noah is able to look SOLID and human. Not even a smudge. This cute thing happens:

They staggered back toward the trail. Blue’s arm was linked around the back of Noah, and her fingers grabbed Adam’s T-shirt so that they were one creature, a drunken six-legged animal.

Suddenly Adam remembers it was Maura he saw in the cave, and he tells Blue. DUN DUN DUNNN!!

Okay but seriously though, what about the comet and what about the court case MAGGIE??

Persephone calls Adam to have a one last psychic training session, and its at a general store on some rocking chairs. Adam is trying to get some information out of her. Like is Maura alive? How do I save Gansey’s life? But Persephone is all dreamy and just wants to talk about the number 3. And how significant that number is. Then, she vanishes, and Adam asks the clerk if he came here alone or not. And she says he’s just been talking to himself this whole time. 

Oh my god Chapter 41 is NUTS. Blue races home to find Adam and Calla getting ready to do some scrying in the reading room because Persephone is missing. Adam, who doesn’t trust anyone, tells Blue “I’m trusting you” — and Blue and Calla hold his hands. Blue is going to amplify his power and Calla is going to keep an eye on the thread to make sure he doesn’t get lost. If your soul strays too far from your body, you die. Adam’s eyes go completely black. And for a moment, he speaks WITH Persephone’s voice calling out for Maura. But then his voice comes back, calling for Persephone. Calla is finally like “alright, pull the cord” and Blue has to let go of him and sever her energy so he’ll wake up. 

“Cut him off,” Calla snarled. “I know you can. I’ll pull him back!” 

As Calla used her free hand to press a thumb to the center of Adam’s forehead, Blue frantically imagined what she had done to pull the plug on Noah back in Monmouth. Only it had been one thing to do it while Noah threw things about. It was another thing to do it as she watched Adam’s still chest and his empty eyes. Another thing as his shoulders sagged and his face fell into Calla’s waiting hands.

She tried to visualize the white light pouring down to strengthen them, but it was hard when she could see Adam’s body sprawled limply across the end of the reading table. Calla slapped his face. “Come on, you bastard! Remember your body!”

It takes a minute. But when he comes to, he says Persephone is in the house. Around some mirrors? So they race upstairs and they find Persephone between the two mirrors and she is DEAD!! WTFFFF!!!

Gansey and Ronan arrive late because Gansey’s phone was off and Ronan never answers his. Gansey leaves Adam with Ronan on the porch (after saying some very sweet things to the effect of “It’s not your fault, Parrish”) — and goes inside. Calla is SO UPSET. He says he’s going into that cave and he’s going to get Maura back. Calla is like NEAT I’m coming too. He leaves the psychics in the kitchen and goes upstairs to find Blue sitting on the floor by Perseophone’s bed. And we get this adorable scene:

It was against the rules, but Gansey crouched down beside her, one of his knees against her back, one against her knees, and hugged her. She curled against him, hands balled up against his chest. He felt a hot tear slip into the dip of his collarbone. He closed his eyes against the sun through the window, burning hot in his sweater, foot falling asleep, elbow grinding into the metal bed frame, Blue Sargent pressed up against him, and he didn’t move. Help, he thought. He remembered Gwenllian saying that it was starting, and he could feel it, winding out faster and faster, a ball of thread caught in the wind. Starting, starting — He could not tell who was comforting whom.

“I’m part of the useless new generation,” Blue said finally, the words right on his skin. Desire and dread lay right next to each other in his heart, each sharpening the other.

Maggie just… wtf. Beautiful.

Gwen kind of spins into the scene and speaks in songs and riddles. Says something about how Artemis taught her how to borrow people’s eyes. That’s how she spent the last 600 years. She says some riddle about a tree at night and Gansey asks Gwen to come with them to the cave.

Earlier that day or later… I can’t tell:

Adam and Ronan stand badassily in Colin Greenmantle’s field until he notices. They come out there and exchange some threatening words like “I know what you are” to each other, and Adam produces a Manila folder. 

Oh fuck is THIS how it goes down? Is THIS the plan, boys? I thought they were going to anonymously give it to the police or something. This is ballsy, but I have a bad feeling about this. Okay well they tell him that if he’s not out of town by Friday, everything in this folder comes true. Colin is especially unnerved by Adam, who has the same regal, far-off look as Piper who has been staring at the mirrors in a trance all day. The folder contains a CHILD’S SEVERED HAND in a baggie, and tons of emails, photos, texts, etc painting him as a murderer and pervert. Holy shit, game on. 

Colin…to my complete surprise…looks at the folder and is like HAHAHA YEP. Fuck this. Fuck all this. Clearly those boys have the Greywarren and know how to use it and IIIIIII no longer care. Honey! Get your coat. Pack your bags, we’re leaving town.

But Piper says NO. I hired two thugs and we’re driving out to the boonies to enter a cave, because I’m having visions about doors, they’re calling me, and we’re fucking going in the cave. Colin comes along, hoping he can convince her to stop it on the way, but they end up running into Jesse Dittley guarding the cave and she fucking SHOOTS HIM. Gray shows up and tries to stop them, but Piper is in full on badass mode and takes him hostage. Colin and Piper get in a fight, and then she tells him to just leave. Go run off like a coward. AND HE FUCKING DOES JUST THAT.

Alright, so the Gansey gang also enters the cave on the Cabeswater side. Calla stays in the car to keep time with Matthew after Blue begs her. Adam is at the front of the line with Ronan behind him, because they figure Cabeswater is more keen to protect the two of them. Ronan also brought his ghost light, one of his dream objects. Gwen is singing her crazy songs. They find THE PIT and Adam and Ronan opt to go in and check it out first. They’re like… full on besties now. Ronan even squeezes Adam’s arm when they’re looking down the pit as if to say “Don’t fall in”

When they get down there, they find some hornet nests (EEK!!) and between Adam’s magic and Ronan’s dream powers, they transform them into birds. I did not know this was something they could do. But NEAT!! They’re Gansey’s magicians. I think it’s the same Cabeswater magic that manifests your thoughts. 

Okay so then they go get the gang and bring them down there, and they find a massive room occupied by hundreds of animal bones - just standing on the ground, fully in tact and suspended upright. Some of them are from animals that are extinct or thought to not exist, like UNICORNS and primordial beasts no one has ever heard of. Gwen says some shit like “If you cannot wake these beasts, then how do you expect to wake my father?” — and Adam hatches a plan to pull his leyline magic toward Ronan, who has his weird dream object no one can look at, and Blue can amplify, and Gansey can point the rocks accordingly. They almost pull it off, but it’s not working. Then Gansey says, with authority, “Wake up” and the skeletons become real animals. YES. I think Gansey’s magic is… commanding things. He is the group leader, after all. 

The animals start stampeding toward the exit. Ronan and Blue manage to hop on the backs of some of them, and they hop out of the room before Gansey, Adam, or Gwen can follow.

Ronan and Blue adventure! LET’S GO!! They’re in a room with a cave lake that doesn’t make any ripples when you throw stuff into it. Ronan is so done. “Hey, I have an idea! Fuck magic. Fuck this.” — When Blue looks into the lake, she sees her mother’s dead body. Ronan pulls her back, saying it’s a trick. He saw his Dad, even though he’s buried in the ground. 

This is sweet. 

For a moment they remained that way, Ronan holding her as tightly as he would hold his brother Matthew, his cheek on her shoulder. Every time she thought she could go on, she saw the face of her mother’s corpse again. Finally, she pulled back, and Ronan stood up. He looked away, but not before she saw the tear he flicked from his chin. “Fuck this,” he said again.

Man, fuck this cave for showing these kids their dead parents. 

Blue remembers some nonsense Gwen said about mirror magic, and how people (witches?) with their particular ability had mirror powers. So Blue thinks she can walk across the shallow lake and be okay. But it’ll swallow Ronan if he goes in. So she has to go alone. He gives her his ghost light, which is super sweet because that means he has to sit there and wait there in the DARKNESS.

Holy shit. So Blue makes it across the river and finds a small chamber with the creepy red door. The door that holds the sleeper we are definitely NOT supposed to wake up. She finds ARTEMUS there, kneeling and looking worse for wear, then also MAURA BEHIND HIM!! She’s alive!! And she is not okay. Apparently they’ve been down there for a very long time, trying to resist the door. It’s so bad, they can’t move. Blue is okay. She hears the door tempting her, but she is a mirror, so it’s not as bad. She ties her parents’ hands and is determined to get them out of there. 

But then Piper shows up with one of her thugs and Mr. Gray in tow. They exchange words. Piper is truly awful and very stupid — going for the door that is probably promising her fame and money. There’s a scuffle, and for some reason the cave is COLLAPSING while everyone is fighting. I forget why it’s collapsing. Maybe from the stampede. It takes some effort, but Blue and her parents make it out safely, along with Mr. Gray. THANK GOODNESS. 

Okay… but what about THE GUYS?? MY BABIES?????

It jumps to a week later. Everyone made it out okay, yay! They gang is dropping Malory off at the airport. Adam picks at the scabs on his hand and thinks about what Persephone told him:

She had told him that there were three sleepers. One to wake, one to not wake. One in between. The others thought that Gwenllian was the one in between, but that didn’t really make sense, because she’d never been asleep. So he didn’t know if it was true or not, but he sort of liked to believe that the third sleeper had been him.

So that’s interesting. Maybe the third sleeper was Adam’s psychic ability. 

One is definitely Glendower. 

One is maybe Adam.

The third is some kind of bad no no we don’t want to wake up. 

Alright well in the epilogue, Piper wakes up in the cave. And NEEVE IS THERE. FUCKING NEEVE. And Neeve says “Hey, wanna get out of this cave? Help me wake them up.” And Piper is like “Fuck yeah!” And they OPEN THE GOD DAMN DOOR. FUCK!

And this?

The sleeper wasn’t human. Piper wasn’t sure why she’d expected it would be. Instead, it was small, and black, and shiny, with more legs than she’d expected. It was powerful. Neeve said, “We have to do it at the same time to get the fa —” Piper reached out and touched it before Neeve could move. “Wake up.”

And that’s the end of book 3!!! 

As always I’m finishing this book like “HAHA I LOVED IT! I THINK? What happened???” — like some of those parts felt rushed. I wanted to see the courtroom scene, but understand why that was cut. (Would have liked to hear the results of it, anyhow!). Still curious about the comet and raining blood lol. And the 3 headed monsters that were spilling out of the cave? What were Gansey and Adam doing while Ronan and Blue were trapped in the room with the mirror lake?? Is Artemis just like, out in the world now? Is it going to be weird with Mr. Gray there. 

Well all the same, I love this book. I love these characters and their severely strange and often scary adventures. I love the relationship emerging between Gansey and Blue. I love the relationship emerging between Adam and Ronan. I love Noah. He’s scary and adorable all in the same breath. They’ve got their group dynamic DOWN with the king, the mages, and the mirror. Everyone is starting to realize their powers, even Gansey, whose power is inspiring everyone and being POSITIVE. EXCELSIOR!

There’s one more book in this series and I’m not ready. AUGH. Here we go. 

Deadass Rating: 7.5/10

Unofficial theme song: “Cosmic Love” by Florence + the Machine