#... do i put this in the character tag. maybe i do

[dailynnt]

FRIENDS WITHIN TOUCHING DISTANCE

⊹ Summary: Jungkook and you, his childhood friend, live together in an apartment, sharing space as roommates. Your relationship, built on years of friendship, is gradually becoming strained by growing sexual tension. You decide to become friends with benefits, trying not to complicate your feelings. But Jungkook's world is not so simple. When you begin to realize that he is hiding something, you open the veil of his double life - a world of mafia, criminal activity, and risk that could ruin not only your deal, but everything you valued in each other.

⊹ Couple: Jeon Jungkook/ Fem!Reader

⊹ Characters: The Reader, Jeon Jungkook, Park Jimin, Kim Taehyung, Min Yoongi, Kim Seokjin, Kim Namjoon, Jeon Hoseok.

⊹ 🔞 Age restrictions: 18+

⊹ 👩🏼‍❤️‍👨🏻 Relationships: ⚤

⊹ 📘 Number of part: 29/30

⊹ 🖇️ Tags: best friends, friends with benefits, slow longing, sexual tension, protected sex, unprotected sex, alcohol, drunken sex, inexperienced main character, mafia au, illegal trade, deaths of minor characters, weapons, swear words, scenes of violence, coercion, psychological pressure.

⊹ 👩🏼‍💻 From the author: Hello my beloved armies 💜 I hope you are doing well 😊 I came to you with chapter 29... Um, I would like to officially admit to you that this chapter was the hardest for me to write out of all 29 that I wrote. Maybe 30 will also be difficult to write, but I'm ready for it 🫡 I don't know why, but it's hard for me to evaluate how this part turned out, whether it's worth all the time I spent and yours too, but this is how I see it 💔 Please let me know in the comments your opinion, maybe you don't like something? 🥺 As always, I appreciate and love everyone who reads and loves this story 🫂 You guys are priceless to me 😭💞

⊹ 🫂 Dedication: For you, my love @myjungkookthighs. You are my favorite person 😘🥰 You know that I appreciate you so much and LOVE you🥰💜

⊹ ⚠️ Warning: English is not my native language, so there may be mistakes in the text. Please don't get mad at me too much! Those under 18, please don't read this story!

⊹ 📋Tag list: @myjungkookthighs, @notsevenwithyou, @nikkinikj, @lovelyyylunaa222, @jiminiemanura, @jalexad, @kelsyx33, @bhonbhon, @unholyforjk, @ambiee3, @mianhae-baozi , @someoneelse0109, @medstudentlifestyle, @mskookie, @kooccult, @smokinghotstargirl , @curse-of-art, @curse-of-art2 @wintaemoonjen, @jungkookswifeeeeeee, @someonegoood, @kooko007, @indigomoonchild09, @zeytiable (If anyone wants to be in my tag list let me know)

≣ Chapter Index ↓

Part 29. Saved. 

Jungkook was not himself. He stood on the terrace of the top floor and nervously lit a cigarette. He inhaled the smoke and felt a little relieved. He had to go to Namjoon and his time was running out, but he needed to smoke at least one cigarette to put his broken feelings in order. He literally took puff after puff thinking about what happened and what he should do next.

Jungkook squeezed the cigarette with his fingers, finishing it all the way to the filter. His head was heavy with thoughts, and his heart was beating faster than usual. He replayed in his mind how he saw you in Namjoon's office. It threw him off balance. Angry, he later yelled at you in Jimin's office and sent you home because you had already done so much that you weren't supposed to. You did your part, even though he asked you to stay out of it, and that was the most annoying thing.

You always did everything for him. Even now, when you were pregnant, exhausted, ready to risk your life to get him out of this hell. You played spy games to get him out of the mafia world. You were threatened, but you did it anyway to find out important information and came to Namjoon to exchange it for his freedom.

He never wanted you to get involved in this shit. You were supposed to live a quiet life, not knowing what it means to trade information for survival.

Jungkook rubbed his palm over his face, exhaling the remaining smoke. He knew you wanted a different life for you. A life without blood, without blackmail, without threats. But how? How can he get out?

Once, at the beginning of all this, he wanted to escape. He fought. He tried not to get his hands dirty with what Namjoon made him do. But then he got used to it. And maybe he even started to like it. The power, the influence, the fear he saw in the eyes of others when he walked into a room... All these things made him who he was. And he was no longer sure if he wanted to leave it. So he was in no hurry to take any radical steps. And damn it, you noticed that, and that's why you're in Namjoon's office today. To beg for him.

Fuck...

Before all this, there was this bullshit about selling weapons to the Black Pearl. It's definitely Doohoon's handiwork. Jungkook knows that he did some business with Black Pearl's Sehun, so he definitely helped Doohoon pull it off.

Thanks to their actions, he was suspected of betrayed. Of offshore fraud, of a meeting that was actually trap. He flicked his lighter irritably, though he had no cigarette. He needed to get out of this somehow, to prove that he hadn't betrayed Namjoon.

Jungkook sighed heavily and turned to leave. But as soon as he stepped into the hallway, he saw Jimin. He looked worried.

"Jungkook-ah, I've been looking for you..." - He stopped a few steps away and looked closely at his friend's face. "Are you okay? Did Y/N leave already?" - Jungkook was silent. He didn't want to talk about your fight right now. But he had to say something, so he gathered all his will into a fist and said.

"I screwed up..." - Jungkook says tiredly, hinting at what you had fought about, and that he was set up and looks like a traitor to Namjoon. "And yes, she's already gone." - Jimin frowns. He realizes that something is going on. "Why were you looking for me?" - Jungkook asks because Jimin is lost in thought.

"Namjoon is calling us all together. He asked for everyone to be in the company this morning. And now we've been told that we're all supposed to come to his office. That's why I went looking for you, that we could go together." - Jimin replies. Jungkook nods his head and walks past Jimin, who immediately follows.

"I was just heading that way." - Jungkook says as Jimin aligns himself with him.

"What's wrong, Jungkook? Why is Y/N at the company today? And why were you two fighting?" - Jimin asks. Jungkook expected him to ask about it.

"Y/N came to get free me of Namjoon's hands." - Jungkook says shortly. He walks down the corridor confidently, taking a wide stride to make sure he makes it within the 20 minutes Namjoon has given him. Jimin walks beside him at the same pace to keep up. But when he hears Jungkook's words, he stops. Jungkook notices that Jimin has disappeared and turns around, finding him a few steps behind him.

"Free you? What does that mean?" - Jimin asks. Jungkook exhale heavily.

"That's what it means. She dug up information that the Black Pearl wants to take over Uranium from us. She came to Namjoon to tell him in exchange for my place in the clan." - Jungkook explains. Jimin widens his eyes, wants to ask something, but Jungkook doesn't let him. He turns around and walks away, throwing over his shoulder. "Come on, Jimin, I can't be late."

Jungkook and Jimin entered Namjoon's office in silence. The atmosphere in the room was tense. Everyone was already in place - Taehyung was sitting with his leg over leg, Yoongi was looking at some documents, and Hoseok was typing something quickly on his phone. Namjoon stood by the table, his arms crossed over his chest, and his gaze was as sharp as a knife blade.

Jungkook walked over to Hoseok and Taehyung and shook their hands, because he hadn't seen them yet. They sat down on the couch with Jimin and waited for someone to break the silence first.

"Is Jin not coming yet?" - Jimin asked to fill the silence, which for some reason seemed heavy, although Namjoon didn't say why he had called them. Everyone present, except Yoongi, who already knew the reason, realized that something serious had happened.

"He'll be later, we can start without him." - Namjoon said tensely and pushed away from the table and moved toward the chair. He sat down, put his hands on the armrests, gently squeezing the material of the chair and looked around at everyone in turn. Everyone present looked at their boss, waiting for an explanation. Only Jungkook was staring intently at the floor, clenching his intertwined fingers. "This morning, as soon as I stepped into my office, I received information that there was a rat in the clan." - Namjoon went on to say. The silence became even heavier. Everyone in the office seemed to be frozen, trying to understand what Namjoon meant.

Jungkook slowly looked up, but did not meet his boss's eyes. He could feel the tension coursing through his entire body, squeezing his lungs and making his heart beat faster. How do you prove you're not a traitor with all this evidence? His head hurt worse.

"A rat?" - Hoseok asked, leaning on the back of the couch. He tilted his head, watching Namjoon, trying to read his expression. "What do you mean?"

Namjoon gave a short hum as if he had heard a completely predictable question. His gaze rested on Yoongi for a moment, as if they had talked about this before, and then he turned back to everyone else.

"I mean, one of us has been transferring money through offshore firms, working behind my back with a man I kicked out of the clan a long time ago."

Jungkook didn't even need to ask who he was addressing. He knew. It was about him.

"Do you have any proof?" - Asked Jimin tensely. Namjoon nodded slowly, pointing to the folder in Yoongi's hands. He threw it on the table and leaned back on the couch.

"Of course there are, Jimin, otherwise I wouldn't have gathered you all here." - Namjoon said a little irritated. Jimin picked up the folder and began to look through its contents. Jungkook didn't even look at the files again, he knew what was in them. Taehyung frowned, rested his elbow on his knee, and intertwined his fingers.

"So who do you suspect?" - He asked without waiting for his turn to look at the evidence files. Jungkook looked up at Namjoon, and the latter he said his name directly into his eyes.

"Jungkook." - His name came out of Namjoon's mouth like a sentence. The room fell dead silent. All eyes were on him. Although he realized the gravity of the situation, he felt that he could handle proving his truth.

Everyone was looking at him-some with suspicion, some with doubt, some with indescribable shock. Jimin closed the folder and looked at his friend. His lips were pressed into a thin line, and his eyes were tense. Hosok took the folder and looked at the contents with Taehyung.

"I want an explanation, Jungkook." - Namjoon demanded. Jungkook sniffled and began to speak.

"I did meet this man, but I swear I don't know that he ever belonged to our clan. He called me when I was in the Suwon, I was waiting for a call about uranium. He said it was about a shipment, so I thought he was talking about uranium. And then he said he had samples and if I had time to meet him to examine them. I found this suspicious because I hadn't received any information about the samples. He started rubbing it in that if I didn't come, his boss would contact you and you would be unhappy. I went and when I arrived, it turned out to be weapons. Japanese weapons of good quality. I asked him where he got my phone, and he mumbled something at first, and then gave me a name. I think it was Takeshi Tanaka..." - Jungkook tells how everything happened that day, not noticing how tense Hoseok was. Jungkook had asked him to find out about this Japanese man, but he forgot to tell him that his people had gotten the information. Because of the whole uranium situation, it just slipped his mind. "I said I didn't know this Japanese guy, I said we didn't need the weapons and left. That was it, I never interacted with this man again. Namjun, I did not betray you. I have no reason to do so." - Jungkook finally finishes his explanation. Yoongi tilts his head and then rests his elbows on his knees, looking at Jungkook closely.

"What do you mean there's no Jungkook-ah? Everyone knows your position in the clan. You're not here of your own free will, and you could easily want to go behind Namjoon's back. Here are the facts: we get evidence of a meeting, a money transfer from our company, and it looks like you want to cooperate with the Black Pearl. And then your girlfriend comes in and tells us that the Black Pearl knows about Uranium, about which knew only seven people, and they want to intercept it. What are we supposed to believe?" - Yoongi asks. Jungkook took a deep breath, trying to control the rage boiling inside him. His fingers clenched into fists so hard that his nails dug into his skin. He turned his gaze to Yungi, who seemed to have already passed his sentence.

"Yes, I'm not here by choice, but isn't it stupid to betray your boss, who already has you in a vice grip? Why should I make my situation even worse? It's not logical." - Jungkook defended himself.

"You said that the man seemed suspicious and insisted that you examine the samples." - Jimin interjected. "Why didn't you call me, why didn't you ask me if this was the case or not?" - Jimin's voice sounded protesting. Jungkook deliberately kept silent, saying that he couldn't reach Jimin and Hoseok at the time because they were resting and simply didn't hear his calls, so he went alone to check what the samples were. Jungkook was silent, weighing whether to tell the truth.

"I called you, but you didn't pick up." - Jungkook said calmly. "I couldn't wait because that man was pressuring me, I couldn't not go because if it was really Uranium we would have gotten our asses handed to us by Namjoon." - Jimin's eyes run over his friend's face and realizes that he hadn't mentioned this moment during the story, but now he said it because he was pressured. Jimin cast a quick glance at Hoseok, and he looked as guilty as he did.

"Why didn't you tell us that you went to Suwon, by the way? Why were you there at that time? The photo said twenty minutes past nine in the evening?" - Taehyung asked, holding the photos in his hands. Jungkook shakes his head and barely holds back an exasperated exhale. He has to admit that he went to his parents' house with you to tell them that you two met, because it's his alibi. But he doesn't want you or his parents to be questioned.

"I went to my parents from Y/N. I had some time and so we decided to visit them. However, I did not know that I had to report to you about my every move. There was no need for that before." - Jungkook says, trying to sound casual but not irritated. Taehyung looked away, his lips pressed into a thin line. Namjoon sighed heavily, running his hand over his face.

"The evidence is well faked if it's not real. I asked Jin to find out everything about this evidence, so we only have to wait for him." - Namjoon said. Everyone was quiet. But not for long, because Jin walked into the clan leader's office. He looked as impeccable as ever, with a lingering smile on his face.

"You're all so miserable. Did someone die?" - He asked as he came inside.

"No one yet, but who knows if anyone will die today, it all depends on what you got." - Yoongi replies in an indifferent voice. Jin let out a short laugh as he sat down at Namdujun's table.

This was not a surprise to anyone. All seven men were very good friends and almost like family. Jin was the oldest, so he could afford to behave like this even with the leader of the Ran Noir clan. On paper, Namjoon is the boss, Yoongi is his right-hand man, and everyone else is subordinate, but in reality they were seven best friends who were very close, almost brothers. Even though Jungkook was with them for four years, he managed to become one of them. He has respect for his older Hyungs, especially Namjoon, even though he resisted him in every way possible at first.

Jin opens his laptop. Everyone looks at him intensely.

"Oh my God, Yoongi, what are you talking about? Inside you’re awakened your bloodlust?" - Jin turns his head to the window, peering out into the dusk. "Is there a full moon tonight or something?" - Yoongi rolled his eyes, and Taehyung and Hoseok laughed softly.

"Jin, that's enough, get to the point." - Namjoon ended his jokes. Jin bit his lip, still smiling, and then folded his hands over his laptop keyboard.

"So the evidence we got on Jungkook is overwhelming." - Jin said. He connected the laptop to the display that hung in Namjoon's office and brought up the images taken in Suwon. “But let's take it from the beginning. Jungkook drove there in his father's car. I checked the license plate, and it's his father's car." - Jin flipped through the photos, and everyone looked at them carefully. "Here's a picture of him getting out of the car, and in the next one they're shaking hands. Then Jungkook and this guy go into the warehouse. And in the last photo, where Jungkook appears, he gets into the car and drives away. The time on the photo is 8:34 pm. That is, their meeting lasted about 15 minutes. And there are no more photos. But I am the best hacker Korea has ever had. So I got the video. The video near the warehouse and also in the middle. By the way, I did a little digging and found out that this warehouse belongs to Doohoon’s father." - Jungkook raised his eyebrows at this, his gaze turned angry. This was the proof that Doohoon was involved. He stared at the monitor as Jin opened the video file, and didn't notice Hoseok fidgeting nervously on the couch.

"Well, here's the video. But there's a caveat, it's without sound, so it doesn't tell us much." - Jin said, pressing the play button. The video starts and Jin comments. "We see Jungkook pull up. He got out and stopped. You can see he doesn't shake hands with Hyuwon right away. Then he's obviously inviting our tongsung to come in and evaluate the goods." - Jin turns off the video and turns on the second file. "Here's a video from the warehouse itself. Jungkook is looking at the weapons in the crates..." - He zooms in on Jungkook's face. "Hey Jungkook-ah, you look confused, not like someone who knows there are weapons in the crates." - Jin turns to Jungkook and winks at him.

Jungkook looks at the older hyung in surprise, as if he knows how to prove his innocence. Jungkook purses his lips and nods in appreciation. He glances around at everyone, and they're all looking at the video carefully. Jin plays the video back as it was and stops it when Jungkook leaves the warehouse. Jin goes to the folder where the video files were and Jungkook notices another file. Another video.

"So what? We don't know what they were talking about." - Namjoon says when Jin turns off the video. He smiled and turned in his chair.

"Did I mention I'm the best hacker in Korea?" - He asks everyone. Yoongi rolls his eyes so that he looks like he's seen his own brain, and Jimin huffs.

"Yes, you did." - He answered for everyone.

"I'm the best because I'm good at getting things that seem inaccessible, and I'm good at hiding things that need to be hidden. I had to find out what they were talking about. The camera does not record sound, but there is a program developed by our native Korean IT specialists that allows you to read words from lips. Guess who has access to it?" - Jin triumphantly opens the third file and text appears next to the video. It's a video of Jungkook and Hyuwon standing in a warehouse. "I'm about to save your ass, Jungkook-ah!" - Jin says jokingly. "You can read the text they're saying on their lips." - Everyone reads the running text carefully.

"Who gave you my contact number again?" - Jungkook's line appears on the screen.

"Takeshi Tanaka, you worked with him. He mentioned you and said you'd be interested." - Everyone reads Hyuwon's response. Hoseok interrupts the silence that was caused by everyone reading.

"Is this the Japanese guy you asked me to find out about?" - He asks Jungkook suddenly. He nods slowly. Everyone else in the room looks at them.

"Yes, about him." - Jungkook says softly. Namjoon turns his gaze to Hoseok.

"Did he ask you to get the information about this Japanese guy?" - He asks tensely.

"Yeah." - Hoseok says, a little guiltily. "I had completely forgotten Jungkook-ah. He called me that evening, probably after he met with this man, and asked me to find information about Takeshi Tanaka. I was at the club at the time. And the next day, I instructed my manager to find something on this man. If Jungkook-ah asks me, I know it's important." - Hoseok says.

"So did you find out anything?" - Jungkook asks, looking at hyung.

"I did find something, but with all the chaos with Uranium, I forgot to tell you." - He admitted. "Tanaka has ties to the Black Pearl, but he's not an arms dealer or anything. He's a drug supplier. We have never dealt with him. So it's obvious that this whole meeting is a setup." - Hoseok concludes. Namjoon exhales a deep breath. He seems to be convinced.

"I told you from the beginning that our golden maknae couldn't have done it." - Jin chimes in. "That's why I checked everything carefully. The money transferred through the offshore account that Jungkook allegedly made was made on the day he was in Suwon. Therefore, he could not physically authorize the payment. This required his personal verification code, which he could only enter from a device connected to our closed network. And that was not possible in Suwon." - Jin explains.

"It's obvious that Jungkook is innocent, judging by their conversation and the fact that someone had access to his device, the code that no more than 10 people know." - Jimin summarizes. "Jungkook was set up well." - Everyone is tensely silent. Namjoon runs his hand over his face and exhales heavily.

"Yeah. Now I see that Jungkook was really set up." - He stands up and walks to the window. He puts his hands in his pockets and stares out at the Seoul night skyline. "So there is a rat after all! And he's working for the Black Pearl!" - He says angrily.

Jungkook stands up and gives a grateful look to Jin and Hoseok, who have essentially proved him innocent.

"Namjoon, I know who set me up…" - Jungkook says confidently. "It's Doohoon, I'm sure of it. I know he's been friends with Sehun for a long time, the Black Pearl's makne. They share a common interest in destroying not only me, but you as well." - Namjoon slowly turned around, his gaze even more intense. The room fell silent, everyone waiting for his reaction.

"It's that little shit again. He still can't stop?" - Namjoon asked.

"Yeah." - Jungkook said. "I think it's all his fault." - Namjoon thinks about what Jungkook said.

"But then who is the rat who told the Black Pearl?" - Taehyung asks.

"It's someone who communicates with us directly. I think it could be our managers." - Jimin suggested. Everyone paid attention to him. Yongi sat up straight and spoke.

"Why don't we use the information that Y/N brought us?" - Yoongi suggested. Jungkook abruptly turned his gaze to his other leader and glared at him.

"What do you mean?" - He asked Yoongi. He looked lazily at Jungkook, explaining his proposal.

"We'll arrange everything as shown in the screenshots that Y/N gave to that journalist, but we'll only change the mode of transportation. In a casual conversation with our managers, we'll say that we had to change the transport because Taehyung reported on inspections from the authorities at the previous location. And then we'll find out which manager could be the rat." - Yoongi finished.

"And how will we know which manager was the rat?" - Taehyung asked. "If everyone knows..."

"Let's get the best hacker in Korea to put a tracer and tap on their personal and work phones." - Namjoon said as he walked over to Jin and tapped him on the shoulder.

"Geez, Namjoon-ah, could you think of anything more boring and unbearable for me than following your managers?" - Jin asked, whimpering. Namjoon slapped him on the shoulder and grabbed his collar, forcing him to stand up.

"Get up from my desk." - Jin stood up grudgingly, grabbing his laptop. "You'll need to keep an eye on Jimin's manager, Hoseok, two of Yoongi's managers, and three of mine. Twenty-four hours a day, checking everywhere you can, I need to know who the traitor is, and when I find out, I'll skin him. They have all forgotten who they are dealing with." - Namjoon said menacingly. Everyone fell silent, and Jin stood next to Jungkook and hugged him like a little brother.

"Well, we have a plan of action." - Jimin summarized, getting up from the couch. "I wanted to suggest that we all go to Muse, we didn’t celebrated Seollal. After work at 7:30 p.m., we'll all go to the club. I think after all this, we need to relax a little bit." - He suggested.

Everyone agreed, and gradually the room began to empty. One by one, they left, discussing plans for the evening. Namjoon was sitting at the table, continuing to work, and when Jungkook took a step toward the door, he stopped him.

"Stay a minute." - Jungkook looked at Jimin, who. He stepped in front of him and raised his eyebrows in surprise. Jimin pursed his lips and sent support in the form of a nod. Jungkook closed the door and walked over to the table.

When they were alone, Namjoon ran his hand over his face, as if to wash away the fatigue.

"I..." - He fell silent, then exhaled and looked Jungkook straight in the eye. "I'm sorry." - Jungkook looked surprised, raising his eyebrows.

"For what?" - He asked, not really knowing.

"For doubting you." - Namjoon said sincerely. "I know how dedicated you are, but when the whole situation started to unfold... I really thought you might have betrayed me."

Jungkook was silent for a few seconds before responding seriously.

"I would never do that." - He assured him. Namjoon looked at him and then nodded.

"I know. I know now." - He was silent for a moment and then added. "If anything ever goes wrong, remember that you can come to me. Always." - He said suddenly. Jungkook tensed a little, but then nodded.

"Thank you." - He bowed low.

"I know you're not here of your own free will, and your girlfriend asked me to let you go in exchange for information she brought me. And it's really valuable information, and it turns out I have to keep my word. So..." - Namjoon stood up from his chair and walked over to Jungkook. Jungkook looked at his boss carefully. "I forgive you all of your debt. You no longer owe me anything. You've worked hard for me all these years, so I've decided that you're now free from our agreement." - Jungkook could not believe he was hearing these words. They had been necessary for him at one point, but why wasn't he as happy as he had imagined when the debt was paid off?

"Are you serious?" - Jungkook asked in disbelief. Namjoon smiled sadly.

"Yes, our golden maknae." - He tapped him on the shoulder. "So if you want to leave, I'll understand, but not right now. Please finish the business with Uranium and you can be free." - Namjoon pressed his lips together. He looked like he was going to cry. Jungkook wanted to laugh that a man like Namjoon wanted to cry for him. He would finally be free.

But something in the middle of him was twisting. He had wanted to leave the world of the mafia for years, and now that he was really free, he seemed... reluctant to leave. He dreamed of this moment, of freedom, of being able to just disappear and start a new life. But for some reason, now this freedom seemed empty to him, like something he does not remember, as something unknown to him. But there was you, and you were pregnant. You will definitely be against it if he stays.

Silence hung between them, but this time it was not tense.

"Namjoon..." - Jungkook looked up again at the man in front of him. He looked calm, but his eyes betrayed fatigue and... sadness?

"Yes?" - Namjoon raised his eyebrows slightly.

"Why now? Why did you decide to let me go now?" - Jungkook asked. Namjoon tilted his head slightly, as if evaluating his words, and then exhaled heavily.

"You've always been one of the best, Jungkook. I've seen you as a potential since the first time we met. And I know I kept you here longer than I should have. But after everything... I realized that I don't want you to stay here just because of your debt. If you're going to be a part of this world, it's going to be by choice." - Namjoon said honestly. "Besides, I made a promise to your girlfriend. How can I not keep my word to her, she's so brave and she really loves you to put herself through such a trial." - Jungkook smiled warmly. But he immediately remembered how he yelled at you today. His heart clenched and he felt terribly guilty. Jungkook didn't know what to say. He nodded, as if accepting Namjoon's words, but his mind was also full of questions that he couldn't find the answer to. "You can think about it." -Namjoon patted him on the shoulder. "Now go. You have a lot of work to do." - Namjoon returned to the table, and Jungkook bowed gratefully and turned and left the room. He was greeted by the warm voices of Jimin and Taehyung, who were waiting for him near Namjoon's secretary.

"Well?" - Taehyung asked when he saw Jungkook leave.

"Is everything okay?" - Jimin was also concerned, nudging him lightly with her elbow. Jungkook nodded but didn't say anything else.

Jungkook went into his office and immediately dialed your number. You were out of range. Jungkook raised his eyebrows. Jungkook stared at the phone screen as he dialed again and heard a cold, automated voice: "The caller is out of range..."

He sighed, running a hand over his face. This was suspicious. You rarely turned off your phone, especially now that you were carrying their child under your heart.

He remembered yelling at you. How his own voice cut through the air, and your eyes gradually filled with pain.

"Fuck..." - He muttered, clutching the phone in his hand. You couldn't just turn off the phone. Was you really offended? That would be fair enough... He was being an idiot.

Jungkook leaned back and closed his eyes. Memories came flooding back to him.

He had known you all his life. At first, you were just friends, inseparable since childhood. You were always there for each other, sharing secrets, laughing, quarreling. Then everything changed. You started living together because he offered to save you some money and it seemed convenient, logical, and right at the time.

This offer changed his life forever. He is happy that he offered you and happy that you agreed at the time. He remembers all the fights he had because of those stupid rules you made up. It makes him smile now, but back then it was so annoying.

There was sexual tension between you because you started to react differently to his jokes, to his touch, you were jealous of the girls he brought home back then. On the day you had a big fight and wanted to move out because he specifically did not follow the rules you created, he realized he had to act.

He realized that you seemed to like him and he was right. Soon after that you two became friends with benefits, and the sex with you was so passionate and insatiable that he was just crazy about you. And then... Then he realized that he could no longer imagine his life without you.

Jungkook was head over heels in love with you. He adored you. And the fact that you loved him back was the best thing that had ever happened to him.You had gone through so much in those six months that it seemed like you had been together forever.

Jungkook always knew you were special. Ever since we were kids, you were more than just a friend to him. But he didn't pay much attention to it - it was just something he was used to, as natural as the air he breathed.

He fell in love with you gradually, unnoticed by himself.

First, he fell in love with your laugh. You laughed loudly, openly, without holding back your emotions. He could recognize your voice among hundreds, and as soon as you laughed, his heart began to beat faster.

Then there was your stubbornness. You always had your own opinion, you were not afraid to object to him, to argue, to prove your point. Sometimes it annoyed him, but at the same time, it fascinated him. He loved that sparkle in your eyes when you were passionate about something, loved your confidence with which you challenged him.

And then came the passion.

It was always there between you - even when you were just friends. Invisible, hidden behind innocent touches, glances that lingered a little longer than they should have. He remembered the first time he touched your lips - you were so sweet on his lips, so provocative, and he fucking loved it. He remembers your first sex. How your skin trembled under his fingers, how you squeezed his shoulders as if you were afraid he would disappear.

Jungkook remembered every night he spent with you. How you whispered his name, how you curled up in his arms, how you gave him your trust and tenderness. These were the moments when he lost his head, when nothing existed but the two of you.

But it was something else that captivated him the most.

The fact that after all the passionate nights you stayed with him. He would wake up in the morning and see you next to him - with tousled hair, slightly swollen lips, still sleepy, but so dear. You would hug him in his sleep, looking for warmth, and then he would realize that you were not just his passion. You are his love.

And this love has lived in him ever since.

You had to do was look at him and he would fall back into that whirlpool. You had to say something in your quiet, trusting voice or run your fingers over his wrist and he would lose control.

You were his fire and his calm. You were his temptation and his refuge. His best friend, his love, his universe.

And every time he looked at you, he fell in love all over again.

Jungkook finally opened his eyes. He will work for a few more hours and then go home. About forty hours passed and he dialed your number again.

"The caller is out of range..." - His fingers nervously tapped the table. He looked at the screen and saw that he had already called you four times.

Something was wrong.

Jungkook tried to concentrate on his work, but nothing was working. Thoughts of you were always in his head. He tried several more times to contact you, but it was all in vain. After two hours, he couldn't take it anymore. He stood up decisively, took his car keys from the desk, and left the office.

Jungkook went to Jimin's office and he was talking to someone on the phone. He had to wait for five minutes, which seemed like an eternity.

"Jimin, I came to tell you that I'm going home. Y/N is out of the zone and I don't like it. Her phone has been off for two hours now." - Jungkook said. Jimin got up excitedly and came over to him.

"Don't worry buddy, she probably just got mad at you and turned her phone off so you wouldn't call." - Jungkook shook his head. He thinks so too, but he'll be calm if he comes home and you're still mad at him and he'll do everything he can to make up with you.

"Yeah, I'll go." - Jungkook says, about to leave, but Jimin stops him.

"Hey Jungkook, when you and Y/N make up..." - He winks at Jungkook, hinting at sex between the two of you. "Come to “Muse” and we'll celebrate it together." - Jungkook smiles.

"Okay, Hyung, we'll come. When are you going to go there?" - Jungkook asked.

"I have some things to do. So I'll be there around 8:00." - Jungkook nods and says goodbye with a final "See you at the club".

On the way home, he tries to call you again, but your phone is off. Jungkook starts to get nervous. He arrives at your apartment, goes up to the 7th floor, enters the code to the door, and immediately realizes that you are not home. He looks for you in all the rooms, hoping that you are just lying there upset with no light on, but you are not there. Not in any room. The apartment is empty.

Jungkook is afraid to imagine what could have happened. He quickly goes to the car and gets behind the wheel. He starts the engine and drives to his apartment. Maybe you wanted to be there. To hide? On the way to his apartment, Jungkook dials Jimin.

"I'm listening to Jungkook-ah." - He says cheerfully.

"Jimin, brother, can you please check Y/N's location on her phone? She's not at home."

"Yes, Jungkook-ah, don't panic, okay?" - Jimin immediately felt the tension in his voice. "I'll check the geolocation now. Maybe she just turned off her phone somewhere."

"Please do it quickly." - Jungkook gripped the steering wheel so hard that his knuckles turned white.

"I'll call you in ten minutes." - Jimin said.

Jungkook drove fast and arrived at his apartment, ran out of the car, and quickly went upstairs. He entered the code, opened the door, and his heart went cold. There was no sign that you had come here.

He walked from room to room, peering into the darkness until didn’t beat the wall. His breathing was labored, his chest tightened with a bad feeling. He instantly turned around, ran out of the apartment, and rushed to his car. As soon as he got behind the wheel, the phone rang.

"Well?" - He asked impatiently, answering the call. Jimin paused and then spoke.

"Kid... I don't want to scare you, but her last location was the Panho Bridge, near the Han River. And then the signal just disappeared." - Jungkook felt his chest tighten with panic.

"Wh-what?!" - He compress the steering wheel hard, trying to control himself. "Are you sure?"

"Yes. But calm down. The phone could have just blow off, or..."

"Or it could have been thrown into the river!" - Jungkook growled, nervously running his fingers through his hair. "Oh my God, she's been kidnapped? Fuck Jimin, she's pregnant... I have to find her!"

"She's pregnant? Oh my god! Jungkook, calm down! We'll find her! Just give me a minute, I'll check the cameras outside her house." - Jimin soothed.

"Do that. And please do it as soon as possible." - Jungkook dropped the phone, started the engine, and sped toward the bridge, ignoring the red lights and other drivers' signals. He was afraid that Doohoon might be involved in your disappearance again. Jungkook gripped the steering wheel with a terrifying force. The fucking sucker! He had enough. He's going to kill him if he's found to be responsible for your kidnapping.

The touches of reality come slowly. At first, it's oppressive darkness. Then - a heaviness in the head, as if consciousness is breaking through a thick fog. Your eyes do not open yet, but the sensations... they cut through this darkness, make you feel.

Cold. A piercing, unfamiliar cold that gets under my skin. You smell dampness, and dust hangs in the air.

You open your eyes. You see a dusty room in front of you. Darkness envelops every corner, with only a faint ray of moonlight coming through the dirty window. The air is frozen, musty, as if this room has not been opened for years.

Your body aches. You try to stand up, but your muscles refuse to obey. Your head is dizzy and your mouth is dry.

What did he do? What happened?

The last thing you remember is Doohoon pinning you to the car, the pain of a needle piercing your neck, and then darkness.

You don't know how you ended up here, but you know it's bad. Very bad.

Your foggy mind tries to figure out what's going on, but it fails.

Your baby.

Your heart is beating faster. What's wrong with her? Panic rolls in like a wave. You run your hands over your stomach, as if that can make a difference. What if it hurt the baby? What if...

No. If anything happens to the baby, you swear you'll kill Doohoon with your bare hands.

You turn your head involuntarily. The phone is gone. Your bag is gone. Nothing. You are cut off from the world.

Panic builds like a snowball, but you force yourself to breathe steadily. Now you can't show fear. You can't panic. You need to understand where you are and what Doohoon is up to.

You have to hold out. You have to find a way to escape. But above all, you need to understand how far Doohoon is willing to go.

Suddenly, the silence is split by the sound of footsteps. Heavy, measured, and you freeze. Your heart beats an anxious rhythm in your chest. The door creaks as it opens. A silhouette appears in the moonlight. Tall, tense. Doohoon.

His eyes are dark, shining with something inexplicable. He stares at you for a long time, as if reveling in the fact that you is helpless here, in front of him.

"Are you awake, Candy?" - His voice is soft, but you can hear the hidden tension in it. "Finally." - He closes the door behind him, and you suddenly realize that the trap has closed. It's hard to breathe from fear and pain, but you won't give up. All that matters now is the baby. You have to get through this. You have to endure it. Save the baby. You think about Jungkook and you want to cry. Sooner or later, he will find you. He will find you.

"He won't find you." - Doohoon suddenly says, as if reading your mind. He stops in front of you. He takes a chair that was standing nearby and sits down. He has a strange smile on his lips that you want to wipe away with your fists.

"Doohoon, have you gone fucking crazy?" - You say, your voice hoarse. You're shivering from the cold, your head hurts, and the gap is still spinning.

"Are you cold?" - He ignores your question and asks his own, a damn stupid one. You raise your eyebrows, wanting to strangle this idiot with your own hands.

His indifference only adds fuel to your anger. You're shivering, but you don't know if it's from the cold or from hatred.

"Are you serious?" - Your voice breaks into a rasp. "Doohoon, you injected me with something and kidnapped me, and now you're asking me if I'm cold?" - He sighs, leaning forward a little. His gaze is full of condescension.

"Well, it doesn't mean I want you to be sick, Candy." - He says it so tenderly, as if you were really his precious treasure and not a kidnapping victim. It's disgusting. It's...

You think of your baby. You look down, and almost instinctively put your hand on his. Fear clutches your throat. He notices your movement and squints.

"What's wrong?" - His voice changes, becoming more alert. "Worried about the baby?"

You force yourself to meet his gaze, trying not to show fear. You look at him with hostility.

"What did you inject me with?" - You ask. He does not answer. He just looks at you. Your patience is running out. When he doesn't answer and you feel like you've been waiting forever for him to answer, you can't contain your anger any longer. "WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO TO ME! ANSWER ME, YOU SICK BASTARD!" - You scream.

Everything happens quickly. He flies up to you and grabs you by the hair with one hand and the cheeks with the other. You automatically grab his hands. His fingernails dig into your soft skin, and his other hand clutches your hair painfully. He brings his face dangerously close to yours for a short distance. His face is still beautiful and flawless, but you see only the monster again, not the beautiful man.

"Who gave you permission to raise your voice to me?" - Doohoon says, lowering his voice to almost a whisper. His breath is hot and unpleasant on your skin. His eyes are dark, almost crazy. He squeezes your face harder, making you feel weak, defenseless. "You know I don't like it when you act so rough, Candy." - His voice is almost caressing, but it sounds threatening.

You gasp for air, trying not to let your fear show. His fingers dig painfully into your jaw, but you don't look away. Your heart is beating in a frantic rhythm, but you force yourself to hold on.

"Just tell me…" - You say, holding back tears. He looks at you, letting go of your cheeks. Then he touches your face gently, almost weightlessly, with his fingers. You resist, but he holds you back by pulling your hair, reminding you that you are in his hands.

"You're so beautiful, Candy. Have I ever told you that?" - He asks, his gaze locked on your eyes. You look at him angrily, no you look at him with eyes full of hate.

"I don't need your compliments." - You say, your voice trembling with hatred. Doohoon laughs. He looks at you for a second longer before suddenly letting go. You can feel the pain where his nails dug into your skin. But you don't lower your head.

"You talk too much." - He sighs, as if tired of your disobedience. Then he tilts his head to the side and changes his tone. "Sleeping pills. That's all." - You don't believe him.

"You mean it won't harm the baby?" - He presses his lips together as if thinking, before answering calmly.

"Why would I lie?" - He asks, putting his hands in his pockets. You look at his figure towering over you. Your hands clench into fists.

"Because you're an asshole." - You say through gritted teeth. He laughs. The sound makes you feel even worse.

"You're so outspoken, Candy. That's one of the things I hate about you." - He admits.

"Why am I here?" - You abruptly change the subject because you can't take the tension anymore. He doesn't answer. He hurls at you an irritating view. Doohoon decides that you have nothing more to talk about and walks away without answering you. "Hey, are you deaf? Where are you going?" - You try to get out of bed and chase him, but he's out the door. When you get to the door, it is already locked. You beat on the door with your hands, screaming, calling out to him, but to no avail. You slide down by the door, sitting on the cold floor and crying.

You sit on the cold floor, clutching your knees with your hands, and tears roll down your cheeks one by one. They are hot, stinging, but you do not wipe them away.

You are desperate. You don't even try to hide it - who needs it? You sob, biting your lip to calm yourself down a little. Everything is so bad that you don't even know how to cope with it. Why you? Why do you have to go through this?

His face pops into my head. Jungkook.

His deep dark eyes that always looked at you with such passion and care. His strong arms that hugged you as if they could protect you from the whole world. His voice full of tenderness when he called you by your favorite nickname...

"Jungkook..." - You whisper it barely audibly, as if this word could make him come here. But the silence in the room only proves once again that he is not here. That he doesn't even know where you are.

Pain rips through your chest. You clench your hands, your nails digging into your skin, trying not to cry even harder. But you can't stop yourself. And then your hand, almost instinctively, falls back on your stomach.

You inhale sharply. A baby. Your baby. You're not alone. You close your eyes slowly, forcing yourself to breathe more evenly.

For her... or him. For your baby's sake, you can't let yourself fall apart now.

A chill courses through your body, forcing you to finally lift your head. You take another breath, swallowing back tears, and finally force yourself to stand up. One step at a time. With your palms resting on the floor until you feel your body finally lift. You go back to the bed and slowly sit on the edge.

You're shaking, but you try to focus on your breathing. Take a deep breath. Exhale. Don't be nervous. Don't think about the worst.

You throw your head back, looking at the ceiling. But instead of a white canvas, you see him again. You remember his warm embrace. His chest, which you pressed against and felt so warm. His hands that touched you so gently.

You bite your lip, trying to push it out of your mind. But your heart feels like it's going crazy with pain.

"Jungkook..." - His name escapes your lips again, like a mantra. You want to be in his arms. You want to feel his warmth. You want him to be with you now... But he's not here. Only you are. And the darkness, which seems to be getting denser by the minute.

You climbed onto the bed, wrapping yourself in your coat. It was dirty, covered in dust. You sat staring at one point and didn't know what to do. You didn't know how much time has passed. An hour, two hours... you completely lost track of it. Your head hurt from crying and stress. Suddenly you heard footsteps again. Doohoon was coming toward you.

You tensed up against your will. How you wanted him to disappear to forever.

He enters the room and you notice that the light is on in the corridor. A strip of light makes its way into the room where you are sitting. Doohoon finds you sitting on the bed and flips the switch.

A bright light fills the room, and you put your hands over your crying face, you can't see the light because you're used to the darkness.

Doohoon goes inside and closes the door. The smell of ramen reaches your nose. You take your hands away from your face and see him putting a box of ramen and a corndog on a chair. He pulls the chair with the food closer to you.

You looked at the steam coming off the ramen, the smell of the seasonings should have awakened your appetite, but you didn't. You looked up at Doohoon, who took another chair and sat down next to you.

"You need to eat." - He said coldly. There was no trace of the softness in his voice that he usually showed you.

"I'm not hungry." - You said, looking away. You turned your face the other way so you wouldn't have to look at Doohoon, who you hated.

He presses his lips together, your words irritating him, but he doesn't say anything. He just pushes the food even closer, as if that will make you change your mind.

"Eat." - His voice is sharp, without any warmth.

"I said I don't want any." - You stubbornly turn away even more. Doohoon exhales, as if he's trying not to get angry.

"It's not up for discussion." - His voice becomes lower, more threatening. "You need to eat. You can't get weak."

"I don't care what you think." - You say colorlessly. You hear him smile.

"What? You decided to torture yourself? You've want to starve yourself until Junguk comes for you?" - Doohoon asks. You turn your head sharply toward him.

"It won't take him long to come get you!" - You say in exasperation. His eyes flash with curiosity. Doohoon gets up and walks over to the bed. He sits down in front of your legs tucked under your arms. You keep your eyes on him, as if preparing to defend yourself.

"You do realize he's not coming, Candy." - His voice is almost gentle, but there is only coldness in his eyes. You hate it when he calls you that. You hate the fake calmness in his voice. You hate the arrogant expression on his face as he looks at you now.

"He's coming." - You clench your teeth stubbornly. Doohoon laughs softly.

"He doesn’t care about you." - His next words make you freeze. "Jungkook won’t be getting out of that hole I drove him into anytime soon." - You blink. What? What has he done again?

"What did you…?" - You say quietly. He smiles contentedly.

"I made sure he wasn’t a problem anymore." - Doohoon replies. Your stomach clenches in horror.

"What are you talking about?!" - Your voice trembles. Did he hurt Jungkook again? He’s been everywhere. What kind of person is he?

Doohoon catches your gaze relaxed, enjoying your reaction.

"I set him up so that it would cost him his life." - He says.

"No…" - You whisper.

"Yes. And I tried to make it look very… convincing. It was easy to make him a traitor." - He says it lightly, as if it’s not a human life.

"Do you know Namjoon personally? If not, I can safely say that everyone who betrayed him is long since resting at the bottom of the Han River." - He says with a wide smile. He sits down closer and you tense up even more.

"No..." - You repeat again, not believing his words. And now you realize that this is the case Namjoon was talking about. The arms trade connected to the Black Pearl is the work of Doohoon.

"So I don't think you should go hungry. You should eat and think for yourself." - You were silent. You are breathing heavily, and you are filled with anger. For the fact that Doohoon can't accept Jungkook's existence. For not realizing that you hate him and that you will never reciprocate. For not being able to stop himself in time and making it all go crazy. Doohoon reaches for the box of ramen and hands it to you. You look at the food and then push it with your hand. All the ramen flies to the floor.

Doohoon sees what you did and his patience is over. He stands up and grabs you sharply. Doohoon squeezes your wrist so hard that you scream. His face is distorted with rage, his eyes dark as a bottomless pit.

"You're unbearable, you know that?" - His voice is husky, threatening. He pulls you sharply toward him, forcing you to rest your arms against his chest to keep your distance. You hit him, try to break free, but his grip only tightens.

"Let go of me!" - You scream, wriggling, but he doesn't even blink.

"Stop playing around. You're mine, and it's time to accept it." - He says. He leans closer, his breath burning hot on your skin. His fingers grip your jaw roughly, forcing you to look into his eyes. His other hand goes around your waist, trying to hold you close. Panic flares up in you even more.

You try to pull away, but in vain. In a moment, you find yourself on the bed, pinned down by his body. You look at him with eyes full of horror. If he does this to you, you just won't survive it.

He tries to kiss you, but you turn your head away, and then you feel his lips on your neck. The adrenaline in your blood is going through the roof. You start to resist even more, screaming. His breathing is hot and ragged, and his grip is iron. You pull with all your might, but he doesn't even move.

"Don't touch me! Stop it!" - You scream, your voice trembling with panic. - "Doohoon, don't you dare!"

He just smiles wryly, his fingers clenching your jaw ruthlessly, not allowing you to turn away.

"There's no need to provoke me, Candy." - He speaks in a low tone, his voice laced with irritation and morbid desire.

You can't breathe. He's too close. His weight is overwhelming, squeezing your chest, leaving no room for resistance. But you are not going to give up. He tries to get through your clothes and you're glad you have a coat on.

"Let me go, or else..." - Your voice breaks, but you force yourself to continue. "If you... if you do that, I'll kill myself!" - Doohoon freezes. His eyes darken even more, and this time there is something new in them - anxiety. He looks at you, his breathing steadies, and his fingers weaken. He is breathing heavily, just like you. You are painfully disgusted with him lying on top of you. He looks at your face for a moment longer, then lets you go and sits on the edge of the bed. He runs his hands over his face.

You can only hear his heavy breathing in the room. You climb further up on the bed, farther away from Doohoon. He turns to you, seeing your frightened look.

"You prefer death to being with me?" - He asks, more disappointed than angry. You look up at him, frightened, exhausted, and broken. Hot tears flow down your face from your shock. You hadn't eaten properly for two days and didn't sleep well, and you didn't have the strength to fight him because he is a healthy, strong man. Even if you knew some taekwondo moves, you couldn't use them, you just don't have the physical strength.

You are silent, scared to death. Doohoon approaches again, but he doesn't get too close. Your eyes are pure fear.

"Candy, you'll be mine willingly. You'll see, I'm much better than that bastard. We'll be happy together, you just have to accept me." - He looks at you, and you don't say anything, still crying. He curses, exhaling heavily. "I'll prove to you that you won't be disappointed in me. Just give me a chance." - He says desperately. You shiver from the old age and the cold.

"I'd rather die than be with you." - You say, determination in your voice. "You are a sick bastard who attacked a pregnant woman and kidnapped her." - You say, finally trampling on Doohoon’s hopes of having any kind of relationship with you. His eyes express anger. He raises his eyebrows and looks at you for a long time. Then he stands up abruptly. He turns to you and his voice is colder than the weather outside.

"I told you that you are mine. Whether you like it or not." - He pushed his foot away the chair with the cold corndog still on it. "Jungkook will not find you, and we will leave here very soon. To a place where no one will know you or me. And of course , I won't let you carry his child." - You freeze. It's like you're paralyzed.

"What...?" - You whisper unconsciously.

"Do you think I'm going to let you have of his child in you?" - His face distorts with anger. "I'll take it away, just like everything else."

You clutch your stomach, as if that could somehow protect your child.

"You won't do that..." - You say, shaking your head.

"I've already decided." - His voice is cold. "Jungkook is dead. And his child shouldn't live." - You clench your jaw, feeling the hot tears running down your cheeks in a thin ribbon along the route you've already laid out.

"If you ever hurt my child, I swear with everything I have, I will kill you." - You threatened. And you were one hundred percent sure of your words. You would never have thought of saying such words before, not even in your mind, let alone felt that you could do it.

Doohoon doesn't answer. He turns around and leaves the room, locking it.

The morning greets you with a coldness that penetrates to the bone. You sit with your arms wrapped around yourself, trying to keep warm. Your eyelids are heavy from a sleepless night, but you don't even think about closing your eyes. You can't. Everything is too quiet in this room, and every rustle seems as loud as thunder.

You don't know what time it is, but the sun has already risen high enough that a gray, dim light is shining through the bars of the window. It makes this room even more depressing - the walls seem even dirtier, the ceiling even lower, and your helplessness even more bitter.

You got up several times to stretch your muscles. You went to the window to study the area. There were bars on the window. You tried several times to loosen them, but to no avail. You couldn't make much noise so as not to attract attention. After trying for the third time, you gave up. You closed the window because the room was already cold.

You went to the door and listened. Doohoon's quiet voice was coming from behind the door. You could hear his words broken off: "at the company," "I got rid of phone," "the situation." The only thing you could understand from what you heard was that Doohoon had got rid of phone, but which phone was he talking about? Was it yours or his?

You listened again, but there was silence. You stood at the door, listening intently, but it was still quiet. You exhaled heavily. Your stomach growls, and you are hungry. You glance at the ramen scattered on the floor, and then at the cordon lying on the chair next to the bed. You turn away and go to the bed.

You lie down facing away from the door, curled up in a fetal position to keep warm. You close your eyes and feel terribly tired. You lie there wondering how to escape, what to do next. Is Jungkook looking for you? He should know by now that you are gone.

Your chest is pierced with pain, he is definitely looking for you. Namjoon didn't kill him. He couldn't have. He would've definitely looked into whether Jungkook could've betrayed him first. You think that would have been the case. But what if he didn't? Your blood runs cold at the thought that Jungkook could have been killed. You quickly push away the horrible thoughts that you shouldn't get yourself worked up.

You almost doze off. A cold, unpleasant dream was beginning to envelop you when suddenly you heard a loud bang. You sat up sharply on the bed, frightened. It felt like someone smashed a chair against the wall.

"FUCK! WHY THE FUCK IS THAT BASTARD STILL ALIVE!!!" - You hear Doohoon's furious voice. Your heart is pounding in your chest in a frantic rhythm. He's alive. Jungkook is alive. And he's looking for you. You run to the door, listening to what's going on behind it. "I PAID YOU MONEY TO DO THE RIGHT THING! LISTEN, YOU DUMBASS, IF I GET TO YOU, AND I WILL, YOU'RE GOING TO BE SORRY YOU DIDN'T DO IT RIGHT." - Doohoon is shouting somewhere in the next room and you can hear him clearly. He stops talking and you listen intently to the silence without even breathing. "Is he coming here?" - You can barely hear. A smile touches your lips. Your heart is racing. Jungkook is coming to get you.

But you cannot rejoice for long. You hear quick footsteps and run to bed. You barely have time to lie down on it, turning away, when the door opens. They swing open with such force that they kick up dust in a shock wave. You turn your head. Doohoon bursts into the room, his face contorted with anger, his eyes full of madness.

"Get up!" - He barks. He walks toward you and you notice a rope in his hands. You don't move. "I said get up!" - He shouts again. You look down at the ropes and notice on his wristwatch that it is 7 am.

He grabs your arm, pulling you to the edge of the bed. Before you can resist, he deftly throws the rope and ties your wrists together. Tightly. So hard that you can barely hold back a moan of pain.

"What are you doing?!" - You struggle, but it's no use. He ties you up. Your hands are tied behind your back, in a tight knot, binding them very tightly.

"We're leaving." - His voice is cold. He pushes you toward the door, forcing you to walk ahead. A few minutes later, you find yourself at the car. Doohoon opens the back door and then shoves you inside with a sudden movement. "Don't think about anything stupid." - He warns you. "I'm not an idiot to give you a chance to be free."

He drive for a long time. You don't know exactly how much time has passed. The windows are darkened, and your hands are cramping from the rough rope. You are worried that he has taken you too far. But Jungkook will definitely be able to find you, you are one hundred percent sure. You are sure that his friends from Ran Noir are helping him. They must be helping him.

When the car finally stops, Doohoon pulls you out and leads you inside a building. It's a small motel. The lamps on its sign have long since burned out, and old yellow light bulbs glow dimly in the corridors. It's almost at the end of its life.

"Be quiet." - He orders, stopping you at the threshold. "If you make a sound, you'll regret it."

You walk into a horrible lobby. An old man sits at the reception desk. He looks at you indifferently. Doohoon doesn't even try to hide your tied-up position. His hand squeezes your shoulder so hard that you're sure it will bruise.

"We need a number." - He says sharply, throwing a money on the countere. The old man looks at you lazily, then shrugs and holds out a key.

"Second floor, end of the corridor." - He answers, grabbing the money and starting to count it. You raise your eyebrows in surprise. This old man doesn't seem to care that you are tied up and dirty. Maybe he sees pictures like this every day, or maybe the earnings in this motel are so meager that he doesn't neglect any earnings.

Doohoon pulls you sharply behind him, forcing you to hurry up the stairs. The door closes with a loud click. The room is filled with the musty smell of dampness and dust. The gray curtain is barely hanging on the curtain rod, and there are dark spots on the ceiling.

"Sit down." - He orders, pushing you toward the old sofa. You don't argue. There is no point in it. You just look up at him, not hiding your anger.

"What are you going to do now? Are you going to sit here and watch me until your plan falls apart?" - You ask. The hope that Jungkook will find you soon gives you strength.

"Shut your mouth!" - He growls. "Don't try my patience!" - He warns. You shut up, thinking it's the right thing to do.

Doohoon doesn't sit down. He walks nervously around the room, clutching his phone in his hand. You realize he's nervous.

A few minutes later his phone rings. Doohoon answers it almost immediately.

"Yes!" - His voice is tense. You stare at his face, trying to understand what's going on. But it's not him who gives you the answer.

"Doohoon, I just found out that they've tracked you down. I saw that Jin is monitoring the roads from Seoul to Osan and Cheonan." - The voice on the phone is clear enough. You hold your breath. Ran Noir is looking for you, along with Jungkook. All you have to do is hold out until they find you.

"Damn shit!" - Doohoon curses. "DO SOMETHING! Turn off the lights, turn off the internet. Do something to buy me some time!" - He yells, ordering.

"Yes, Doohoon, I'll do anything for y..." - Suddenly the sound in the phone changes. It's screaming. The man on the other end seems to be choking on his own words.

"What the...?!" - Doohoon doesn't understand what happened. He hears the rustling and screaming. "Hey Insoo, what's wrong?" - Doohoon waits for an answer. You strain your ears. And you hear someone answering.

"Hello, honey." - You hear a familiar voice, but you can't remember who it belongs to. "Hey Doohoon, I think you're in big-big shit." - You catch the jovial tone and realize it must be Jin.

"Fuck!" - Doohoon throws the phone against the wall with all his might. You duck as the phone goes straight over your head. It shatters, falling into pieces. You realize only now that it was not his phone. He was using an iPhone, and the broken phone, the pieces of which are lying not far from your feet, is a Samsung. You don't have time to say anything. He abruptly grabs you, forcing you to stand up.

Doohoon drags you outside. He opens the car and pulls you into the trunk. Once you're in it, panic immediately clamps down on your throat. There is not enough air. There's not enough space. Your head is pounding, but you try not to panic.

You don't know how much time is passing. You were counting the minutes, but then you lost track. You were also ready to remember whether he turned, whether he turned on his turn signals, whether he stopped at a traffic light. But it was useless. You drove straight the whole time, not stopping anywhere.

When the car finally stops, Doohoon pulls you again. Your whole body hurts and you are exhausted to the max. The building he brings you to looks like it should have collapsed long ago. You inhale the dust and metallic flavor. An aluminum factory or something like that?

Doohoon drags you up the stairs, which sway under the weight of his steps. He sits you down on the floor. And he looks nervously out the window, which looks like it leads to the road. You see him reach into the waistband of his pants and pull out a gun. You freeze in horror.

He twirls the gun in his hands as if thinking about something, and then abruptly puts it down on the windowsill, sighing heavily. The room is in tense silence, broken only by the sound of the wind seeping through the cracks in the walls.

You clench your fists, feeling the ropes cut into your wrists. Your heart is pounding furiously.

"Why did you do all this? What have you achieved?" - You ask, your voice hoarse with fatigue. Doohoon doesn't even turn his head.

"You should have been mine from the beginning." - His voice trembles with anger. "He stole you from me, shamelessly, when I told him I liked you." - He turns to you, and his eyes are fierce. "You chose a scumbag. You chose him!" - Doohoon takes a step closer, and you instinctively move away. "And I... I loved you all my life!" - You shudder at his words.

"Love?" - You laugh bitterly. "Is this love? Kidnapping, violence, threats?" - He clenches his jaws, his eyes full of hatred.

"I could have given you everything... You ran to him. To an arrogant, narcissistic bastard who fucked everything that moved! And you took him when he was sated enough." - You look up at him sharply.

"You think you can hurt me with that? Do you think I don't know that?" - You ask. Doohoon grinds his teeth.

"You know…" - He said with venom in his voice. "So that means you just another one on his list. Another Jungkook’s whore!" - Doohoon says roughly and approaches you.

"And you're just another pathetic loser who can't accept the fact that he's been rejected!" - You reply with no less rudeness. His fist clenches. And a moment later you feel a sharp pain as his palm comes down on your cheek with all its strength. Your head falls to the side, your ears ring.

"SHUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTH!" - Doohoon screaming. You accidentally bite your lip, not expecting a blow, and it starts to bleed. You remain silent, licking your lips, the taste of blood flooding your mouth. "I'll wait for him here." - Doohoon says, grabbing your hair. He tilts your head back and looks right into your eyes. "And this time it really will be over." - He pulls your head back and walks away.

You are left alone. Your chest heaves painfully with deep breathing. Tears are in your eyes, but you don't let them escape.

And suddenly... A barely audible rustle. You raise your head sharply. And you meet his eyes.

Jungkook.

↰ Previous chapter ⋮ ≣ Index ↓ ⋮ Next chapter ↱

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Pent Up 1

No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.

Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as noncon/dubcon, virginity loss, age gap, and possible untagged elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: you seek validation through online correspondence with incarcerated men, only for one to lock you down in turn.

Characters: convict/excon!Thor (silverfox)

Note: It's an addiction now.

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me.

Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!) Please do not just put ‘more’. I will block you.

I love you all immensely. Take care. 💖

'I never thought I'd be writing to someone like you, but you've shown me a different side of things. I hope that my emails give you comfort and can help you through. Even on the other side, they get me through my day. I'm always excited to read when there's a ding in my inbox.

I hope you also enjoy the little bit I could put in your commissary. If I lived closer, maybe I could bring you something homemade. At the moment, bus fare is a bit too much for my pockets.

Anyway, signing off.

Yours,

Diamond'

You add a whole line of heart emojis to the email then hit send. You giggle and click on the next. You don't have the heart to copy and paste so you add a bit of variety to the next.

This one is... Thor? That's his name. He's a funny one. Considering he's in the pen, you're surprised by that. The others are so dire; pushy too.

You hit reply on his last email. Something about a fight and apologising for not replying earlier. He says he was in solitary for a whole week. That sounds miserable. The thought is enough to scare you straight. It's why you've never done anything wrong in your whole life. Until now.

It's not really wrong. It's allowed. It's legal. You're just sending messages. If anything, it's a community service. These men don't have much more contact than each other and that's a recipe for chaos.

You won't admit that other reason aloud. That tickly feeling in your stomach. When they compliment you, when they say they missed you. You can't help but smile, even giggle sometimes. It's nice to be appreciated, even if it's all a fantasy.

You'll never meet these men. That's the fun part. You don't have to worry about any of this. Maybe that helps. Maybe you think too much when you're face-to-face. That explains why every cute guy you talk to sees past you.

'I forgive you, sweetie. It must have been so hard in there. The important thing is you replied. I got so worried! I hope that after all that, my email can bring a bit of comfort. I have to be honest, I never thought I'd be chatting with someone like you. That I could find this type of connection. Please, take care and email soon.'

Another parade of emojis follows and you send it off happily. Now you just have to wait and see who gets back to you first. If it's Ernie, you're not sure you'll respond. He's been fixated on his cell mate and his emails are getting a bit scary. That's the other great part. You can always just delete and block.

The response comes an hour later. You're sleepy and ready to pass out. You read it anyway.

'You are so kind, my queen.' You giggle. Yeah, he calls you that sometimes. If only he knew you were sitting in bed with an ice cream sandwich wrapper and your cell phone. Definitely not queenly behaviour. 'I got through it by thinking of you, of dreaming of the day when we can talk face-to-face. Wouldn't that be lovely? For all my mistakes, I think they will mean something if you and me can be together.'

You make a face. He's so cheesy. You can't help but laugh again. You're not trying to be cruel, you do empathise with his situation, you can't imagine being in prison, but like anyone else, he earned his time. There's one last light.

'If it isn't too much trouble, would you kindly send a picture so I have a face to admire in my lonelier moments? I've attached my own. Forgive me as it dates a few years back.'

You're not smiling anymore. You haven't sent any of the men pictures. They haven't offered theirs but you can look up their mug shots easily. You hate to ruin the fantasy but curiosity has you tapping the attachment.

Oh. You're surprised. He's older than you in this picture and by his own confession, is more so now. But he isn't repugnant. Anything but. Tall, blond, thick! You don't know if you've ever seen a man that size.

Even in a suit, it's obvious that his arms are bulging and his chest is ripe to burst out as the jacket button clings for dear life. The photo is cropped so that whoever he took it with is out of frame. His blue eyes sparkle above a defined smile. Has prison worn down all that?

You squirm. Guilt needles in your chest. You could close out and worry about it in the morning. You shouldn't be that sympathetic. He's still a criminal. You can say no. Easily. What's he going to do about it?

What could it hurt? If he saw your face. It's not like anyone would know. That anyone would recognise you or that he could find you anywhere else. You keep your social media anonymous. You aren't like the influencers who get attention just for being pretty.

It's that that gives you pause. You aren't anything but average. It's easier to pretend you're some pretty thing as you message these faceless men. Well, maybe that's a good thing. Maybe once he sees you, you won't have to worry about all that other stuff. He'll cut you off at the pass.

The thrill of it overwhelms your reluctance. It's like gambling, it could go either way.

You start a new message. More meaningly rewording of previous sentiments. Nothing new. Then you scroll through your photo roll. You take a breath and press down on a photo you think isn't half bad. It's from market day you went to with your aunt. Not exactly cutting edge but fun. She snuck in the shot as you smiled down at your gooey cinnamon roll. The impromptu snap is better than most of your posed ones.

You send and quickly lock the phone. You shove it under your pillow and swipe up the wrapper beside you. You leave it on your night stand and sink down, your insides swimming with anxiety. You're going to regret this in the morning.

🎀

'Will you call me?'

The question makes you sweat. You don't know why you feel bad. You've said no before. To him. To all of them. You draw a thick line between your secret little hobby and your real life. You shouldn't have ever sent that photo.

Despite your regret, you smile. His response was more than you could expect. The praise! You don't know that anyone ever even called you cute but he as good as wrote you a poem about your beauty. You have to remind yourself, given his circumstance, he's starved. He'd probably think your nan is sexy.

Still, you're having a hard time typing those two letter; N-O. Thor is so nice. And he asked so sweetly. But you can't do that. What if someone found out?

This whole thing is starting to feel like a big mistake, but it's so much fun. When in your life will men ever be this into you? When have they ever?

'I could call' you type without thinking. What are you doing? 'Let me know how to do that and we can set a time maybe.'

Don't hit send. Don't hit send.

Email sent.

Shit. Oh gosh. Why did you do that?

You close your laptop and leave it on your desk. You need to get ready for work. You can't be worrying about a man you'll never meet. It's all virtual, it's not real. You'll be okay.

You get yourself together and brace yourself for work. You don't really like your job. You work the counter at a tech repair shop. Independent so it's small and slow. Your boss is a bit strange too.

The only benefit is it's close and it pays a few bucks more than the alternative. You're even allowed to work on your online courses at the service desk. Really, it's perfect. You guess you're just not happy with things being boring.

You blow over the lid of your Sailor Moon travel mug and knock on the door. Jensen lets you in with a grin and stifles a yawn in his elbow. You step past him with a sheepish smile.

"If it isn't the champion of justice," he greets smugly and locks the door. You won't open for another half hour.

"Huh?" You go to the counter and slide your bag onto the shelf underneath.

"Your cup," he crosses the shop. “I am Sailor Moon, the champion of justice. In the name of the moon, I will right wrong and triumph over evil… and that means you!”

"Oh, right," you snort at his cheesiness. "You have espresso or something?"

"Red bull," he admits guiltily.

"This early?"

"Early? I never went to sleep," he comes around and goes back to typing on his glowing gaming computer. "Couldn't let my crew down."

You could roll your eyes. All he does is play Fortnite or Halo. He looks like he does too. Yet, he's in here moping after every rare stunner that walks through the door. That's why you'er there. He gets all tongue-tied with women. Well, all of them but you.

"You should join the party," he suggests.

"Well, I don't really play anymore," you shrug. "It was only for fun. My siblings... like it."

"Oh yeah, how's the family?"

"Good, I guess. They don't really call."

Your mom's too busy rebuilding her life with your step-dad. Rather, building the perfect life she never had. You sigh and open up your laptop. You grab your coffee and sip. You're tired of being forgotten.

"Jake," you say, he winces at the use of his first name, "Jensen," you glance at him, "you're a dude."

"Yeah, I am" he answers uncertainly.

"Well, you might know more than I do. You know anyone in prison? Any guys?"

"What?" He exclaims. "Where did that come from?"

"Mm... I was watching a documentary last night," you lie. "About prison or whatever."

"Oh?"

"Yeah, and about you know," you sway and look at your laptop. You're terrible at lying. "The women who like write to them or whatever."

"Ew, like the Ted Bundy weirdos?" He scoffs.

"Not exactly. I mean, none of them were murderers. I think," you shrug. "But... like, if you were in prison, you'd need that, right? I mean, it's just to get you through."

"I don't know. It'd be lonely, yeah, but like... what about after?" He scratches his neck. "I got a buddy who was in for a while but he's a good dude. He was only selling... stuff."

"Really?" You perk up, "he went to prison?"

"Well, he doesn't like to talk about it," Jensen says. "Why are you talking about this?"

"Making conversation. I was just thinking about the show," you sign into your laptop. "Just thinking... I mean, how do you even end up there?"

"Bad things. I learned my lesson when I was sixteen. I broke into the high school on a dare and the cops put me in cuffs for two hours. They let me go once I cried... I mean, I was a kid so..."

You nod and try not to show any judgment. That sounds about right. A notification pops up in the corner as Jensen goes back to the fluttering over his keyboard. You click on the email.

'I've been granted call-time at noon. You can call the number below and request by my inmate number...'

You quickly minimize and hide behind your cup as you slurp. Shoot. You didn't think he'd be so fast. A call at noon? You can't say no. Not now that he got approved.

Well, this is the only time it's happening.

[finishwhatyoustarted-event]

Finish What You Started 2025 - Event Rules

[simple ID, more in alt: basic rules for the event. End ID.]

The goal of this event is to get things done that you’ve already started. We all have unfinished projects whose incomplete status haunts us. Those are what we want to tackle!

The structure is loose, as this is a multimedia event. While primarily aimed at writers, this event is open to any kind of creative fanwork. Fics, translations, podfics, fanart, animations, cosplay - if you started it and never got it done, it qualifies. There is no sign-up required. I will not assign beta readers for writers, but I can boost requests for those who want them! And I can boost messages of those who would like to beta read.

The mod is a danmei fan mainly, but your work can be any fandom. Maybe something you started before your current fandom excitement took over, or one you keep putting off in favor of compelling new ideas.

Feel free to pass this event info along! The more the merrier!

Further rules and clarifications:

Alt text is very encouraged, especially for boost posts or artwork! Remember, alt text is searchable (so much as anything ever is on this site), so it can help more people find your work as well as letting vision- and internet-impaired fans enjoy it (which is its main purpose).

Machine Generated or “AI” images and writing are not permitted. If you are found in violation of this rule, you will be removed from the event. All images, writing, or other works must be your own.

If your work is NSFW, I will only boost it if it has appropriate content warnings. Spoilering images is recommended but not required as long as it’s tagged. Do not letter-swap or abbreviate content warnings. These are so people can mute them as needed. Example: “gore” not “g0re”

Remember Tumblr can mute phrases, but each warning should be its own tag as well as in the body.

Please use genderbend or genderswap for characters depicted not as canon genders. Example: “#NSFW #genderbend #gore”

Please use Omegaverse or A/O/B for that content. The original letter order is a slur against Aboriginal peoples and will not be tolerated here, even with the slashes. It, like other racial or identity-based slurs, fall under hate speech and are thus not permitted.

This is a positive, shared space. Do not belittle other creators’ medium of choice. Please no fandom/character/ship/creator bashing, and don’t berate artists or authors for not being done with something, even if they don’t finish by the end of the event. Also, please don’t passive-aggressively send this event to the author of an unfinished fic you want to see done faster. 😥 Be cool, respect each other, and keep any interpersonal disagreements to your own tumblrsphere.

Schedule and Hashtags

This account will post weekly morale-boosting messages and helpful resources. Every Friday, starting March 14th, will be Finished It Friday. All the completed works posted that week will be boosted together in a big thread, so we can celebrate your accomplishment!

Halfway-point check-in is April 1st. Final event deadline is April 30th. The last Finished It Friday is May 9th.

All posts and boosts will be crossposted to the event bsky (finishwhatyoustart.bsky.social) and Discord. Expanded rules, explanations, and Dead Dove guidelines can also be found on the Discord. (invite link in pinned post)

Fics can be posted to the AO3 collection (archiveofourown(dot)org /collections /FinishWhatYouStarted2025_Spring)

Work-in-progress posts should be tagged #FinishWhatYouStarted2025 . If you complete a wip within the event, tag it #IFinishedWhatIStarted2025 for boosting so we can all celebrate!

FAQ:

Q: Are original works acceptable?

A: This is primarily a fanwork-focused event. If original work is the only WIP you have to work on, it’s certainly fine to work on it during the time frame of the event. If it is posted publicly when finished, you may tag it for boosting.

Q: Are there any restrictions on topics?

A: No, so long as your event # post is properly & fully tagged for content (see rules about tagging above). "Dead Dove” topics are allowed. Some submissions will be 18+. For me, this is less about the content and more about finishing it.

Q: Are there any restrictions on media that can be submitted?

A. All content created must be your own and must abide from other stated rules. The usual restrictions based on laws and Community Guidelines of course apply, so you may need to tailor how you post to which event space your interacting with. Twitter, Tumblr, and Discord all have their own rules. There are also some topics that are in poor taste to make fanworks around. The event organizer and mods reserve the right to not boost your work if they decide it is rage-baiting or trolling. They are not responsible for negative reactions to your works. Please be respectful of those you share a digital space with.

Keep in mind that when I link to your finished work during a Finished It Friday, it may reach a wider audience than you may be used to.

Find more information and community on the Discord, if you want! Joining the Discord is not required for the event. As always, if you have questions, don’t hesitate to reach out!

[colliemom2001]

For a LGBTQ+ book collection, you can get a free digital card from the Queer Liberation Library! Check out there collection, it’s awesome.

As for libraries, lots of libraries try to have diverse books and I recommend searching there online catalogs as many of the books have digital tags. You can search by title or author but also genre and subject matter. Most libraries should have something, but I can’t say anything definitive because it depends on the country, but explore your library! Libraries are supposed to be welcome and safe spaces for all!

Some libraries will put little signs that these books contain queer characters and subject matter (some obvious displays, but they are usually more subtle like placing rainbow bookmarks in the joke ) but many are hesitant to advertise books as such (with stickers or displays) for patron comfort and safety. I didn’t do a display for pride month last year but maybe I will this year, especially because we are updating the collection.

As for the books. Be an advocate, give us resources! If you want specific books please give us librarians recommendations and purchase requests. We want a diverse and representative collection. Us librarians want to have material that our communities want to read.

how do you even go about finding queer friendly libraries or queer owned bookstores?

This is a complicated question depending on where you live. I wish I had a handy-dandy list for you, but unfortunately I don't. But here is my experience, which is largely informed by a lot of privilege.

A great way to see what your library is open to is visiting your library, look at their displays (especially around pride month) and see if there are any queer books dotted in there. If there aren't that doesn't necessarily mean that the librarians themselves are unfriendly to the idea. It might be in accordance to local regulations.

But one big thing you can do to effect how queer friendly your local library is use it. Give them data that they can point to and show their board to say that queer books are in demand.

That can look as obvious as requesting books or as subtle as picking up queer or queer adjacent books and putting them on the carts to show that someone was looking at them.

I don't want to assume your experience or your country of origin, but if you are going to a larger city, you should be able to use a search engine to look up if there are any queer specific bookstores there.

Otherwise you can also contact local queer orgs, and see if they have a library themselves, because some do! Again this varies greatly depending on where you live.

That being said, libraries in my experience give so much room for advocacy. There is a reason I talk so often about requesting queer books, and checking them out from libraries. Honestly libraries are one of the best places to make big waves with small actions.

[tomahachi12]

Meet the Doormans!

see I'm working on AU stuff lol

still no name for it though, but I'll figure that out eventually

Info about them down belooooow

Cyn "Cynthia" Swapped with - Uzi Age - 18 She was 6 years old when her mom died and the trauma from the event caused her to shut down and stop talking. She learned sign language from Noah so she could communicate. For anyone else that doesn't understand her, she'll either use text on her visor or a projected text box. She doesn't interact with anyone and prefers to keep to herself, the only one she really opens up to is her brother. He's the only one who can call her by her actual name, she'll ignore everyone else. Inherited her solver from her mom, which activated after her mom's passing. She's scared of Khan.

Noah Swapped with - No one! Rewritten for story Age 25 7 years older than Cyn. He was 13 when his mom died. No one knows why he's so tall. He took care of Cyn after their mother died. He learned sign language and taught it to Cyn. He's a member of the Worker Defense Force. Loves doing anything! boi stop hiding your pain and get help He wants his dad's approval, not only for himself, but for his sister as well. Does not have the Solver at least not yet

Khan Swapped with - No one! Rewritten for story. Leader of the Worker Defense Force and Outpost 3. Very stoic and closed off, especially after Alice died. After his wife died, he completely threw himself into his work, neglecting nearly everything else (including his kids ): ) Because of Cyn's strong resemblance to Alice, he can't bear to even look at her. He killed his wife.

Alice Swapped with - Nori Huge fukin nerd. Western movies were her favorite. Her pet-name for Khan was "Sheriff" She loved to play "dress up" especially with her kids. She was still part of the Solver Experiments, but did not cause the implosion, that was still Nori's doing. She had pretty bad Solver Moment when it took her over and she slaughtered an entire apartment block. She couldn't stop herself and begged Khan to kill her. She was 33 when she died.

[tenderjock]

I’m with you, my love The lights shining through on you Yes, I’m with you, my love It’s the morning and just we two

[incomingalbatross]

Don't quite know how to put this but there are certain story beats that, in order for me to actually like/admire the story, specifically have to be accomplished without being a big deal.

Like, does your story present ordinary, mundane, even ridiculous people as possessing worth and dignity? Cool. Does it pat itself on the back about doing that? Unfortunately, that has circled back around to patronizing.

Does your character make the lives of bit characters and nameless bystanders a priority, even when it distracts them from Important Plot Things? Nice! Does your character make a big production of/express a lot of angst about doing that? This only barely edges out "leaving them to die" in terms of my respect for said character.

Ordinary people are just as valuable and important as Our Heroes. But the narrative should have enough conviction about that to take it for granted, and let the audience catch up if need be. A Hero should definitely take it for granted, unless they're still in the process of becoming heroic.

Otherwise, I'm left with the sneaking suspicion that the writers don't really see this themselves.

[emborami]

Hi so in case anyone was dying to know, this is what i think some of the cast of the terror would look like as animals :3 notes under cut

From left to right:

Crozier- Irish Terrier

Silna- Polar Bear

Goodsir- ryeland sheep (known for tasty mutton ;3)

Hickey- red fox

Franklin- old english game rooster

Fitzjames- red deer

I had fun coming up with them :) and I kinda wanna doodle some screencaps but with like a lil short sheep goodsir and his bestie the giant polar bear lady silence whom he thinks would love England. Or like hickey on his bullshit but with more flair bc he would have a fox body and tail to really fuck up that line of action

Anyways heres some closeups and sketches

[peachypine]

the roomies!!! i originally designed this ososan oc trio in full about a year ago to write on an rp blog. it's not really active rn, but i still want to talk and post about 'em, so here they are! just basic rundowns, but i'd be curious to hear which one (if any) is your fav of the three (feel free to leave it in the tags?? if u want!)

bonus transparent of them all together:

aaand some rambling under the cut about their designs

anzu:

i wanted to use orange as a character colour bc it's one that wasn't already used in the matsu rainbow, and i had a concept of a gyaru character named anzu kicking around in my head for a long time as well, so here we are. miwa from the mixer ep inspired the eyeshadow (orange rather than miwa's blue obv, to keep with her colour theme) and delinquent totoko's design inspired her ombre dyejob! i went with a blonde-to-orange look as a nod to anzu's namesake fruit (apricot).

the strands framing her face are split into 3 sections at the end (2/3 are grouped together and 1/3 flips in the other direction) which is a little nod to her being one of 3 siblings (eldest), as well as the "三" character used in her surname (mikado) meaning 3. the rest of her hairstyle is just because i thought it looked cute, though.

ososan's style is more simplified, but i wanted to convey makeup that was a little bold, but cute (long false lashes, eyeshadow, & and a soft pink or nude glossy lip). clothing-wise, she mixes and matches a few different substyles (agejo and onee are prominent, with some ane, tsuyome, and general old school gal influences as well?), with a particular fondness for animal prints, esp. tiger print. (that said, orange tiger print doesn't seem all that common in gyaru clothes, so in-universe i like to think that the top pictured above was originally a black-and-white zebra(?) stripe print she thrifted and dyed at home--close enough!)

her nails day to day are usually medium length since she has a lot of hobbies that involve her hands and anything longer makes those things a bit more cumbersome. sometimes they're decoden/bedazzled, sometimes they're just painted a cute colour/pattern, depends on the day! and i think she opts for press-ons over extensions for longer nails, since it's cheaper.

ran:

i'm just a bitch who loves purple, that's the reason for this one. i think the hime cut with shorter bangs is nice because you can showcase the eyebrows (i think eyebrows can really elevate a character design so i gave all 3 their own brow shape) without worrying about the lines for the eyebrows and bangs intersecting in an annoying way when you draw it. i like shorter, slightly sharp eyebrows like these because they're easy to draw, lol. i think they're usually furrowed like she's displeased with something, but that may just be her resting face. i also thought this blunter, sharper-looking cut (bold, standoffish) was a fun contrast to anzu's flippy half-updo (bright, bouncy) and yuzu's short, wavy hair (languid, relaxed).

5 piercings on each ear (2 spiked helix & 3 lobe) = 5 siblings including ran (4 older brothers). the other reason for this number of piercings was that her namesake flower (orchid) had--i thought--5 petals, but as it turns out i'm a fool, it's actually 3 petals (including the lip) and 3 sepals??? ah, well.

clothing-wise, influences from various punk/vkei styles alongside some rokku gyaru. (maybe anzu introduced her to this one?) this brash style is the total inverse of how she was expected to dress growing up. (when she and anzu first met, she was an OL with no piercings, undyed hair, and positively miserable, but that was a number of years ago now.) i'm really not reinventing the wheel with "small and angry", but y'know, we have fun here.

yuzu:

is teal distinct enough from blue to count as its own colour? i think so. for yuzu, i really loved the concept of a deadpan-looking character who is very much not the straightman, who in fact wants very badly to be the funnyman 99% of the time. that kind of straight-faced but silly comedic character is always really fun to me.

half-lidded/heavy-lidded eyes paired with thick brows are always a winner to me fsr, and i wanted to give her a more "handsome" looking face with a bit more of a defined jaw than you typically see on women in ososan. as a treat. i wanted her to look a bit like a mysterious prettyboy, but she's not actually mysterious, she's just a space cadet. (and very straightforward about her thoughts and feelings, saying them with little fuss or thought.) expectation vs reality, people deciding what you're like based on their own perception vs what you're actually like, etc. etc.

i don't have anything deep to say about her hairstyle, but maybe that's how yuzu would like it, what you see is what you get. (again, eyebrows vs hair... let that eyebrow scar that i gave her for no reason shine.) as for clothing, she prefers things that are easy to move around in, so her style is the most "matsuno"-like (t-shirts, hoodies, basketball shorts, sweats, etc.). in particular, she likes shirts with phrases, usually in english, that are funny or almost make sense but not quite ("for background visual gags" and "for the english speakers in the audience").

[cryptids-do-autism]

Happy holidays to everyone! I say several days after the holidays are over.

[lacrimosathedark]

Hiya. Aroace-spec enby Hazbin fan and Radioapple shipper here. No hard feelings here, but you are incredibly misinformed so allow me to learn you a few things.

Firstly, I can tell that this is something of a vent post. That's okay, sometimes you need to just get your feelings out into words and be heard by somebody, anybody. That's alright.

That being said, when that vent includes something people enjoy in non-harmful ways (like shipping fictional characters) you don't add those tags. Ship hate stays out of ship tags for everyone's safety; so the shippers aren't hurt during what could be their only fun time, and so you aren't hurt when less understanding people retaliate. Because they will, as you've maybe noticed by now.

I'm putting the rest of this under a cut because it's long because I am incapable of shutting the fuck up and overexplain. I just want you to know I'm not yelling at you and hopefully don't feel too overwhelmed by this.

Now, I'm glad you want to defend us, but defending us without accurately understanding us only causes harm. As someone on the trans spectrum that's usually overlooked (and maligned if you're transfem) I hope you recognize that. People are so intensely misinformed on sex and gender that even when they advocate for us, sometimes they unintentionally spew transphobic bullshit. That's kind of what you're doing now.

Asexuality and aromanticism is, as you said, about attraction, but that's all it is; attraction. It's that yearning or hunger for that specific thing. This does not preclude aromantics from participating in pseudo-romantic relationships or actions of various kinds, or asexuals from sexual relationships. Sexuality is not synonymous with libido or hedonism, romance is not synonymous with intimacy or companionship. There are lots of sex-positive asexuals who are some of the horniest motherfuckers in the world; they just don't feel attraction. Similarly there are aromantic people who want the reliable closeness of a romantic partner just without the lovey dovey stuff, and may even act in ways that can be perceived as romantic from a platonic standpoint. And the mesh point non-sexual non-romantic aroace committed relationships is a queerplatonic relationship. It's kind of like "best friend" but more committed and takes many forms.

Also presuming we need to be sheltered, that we're all sex-repulsed and romance-repulsed and should be protected from such things, is a little infantilizing. I'd love more media without sexual implications, and I know aros who are beyond sick of all media being about romance. But we live in this world every day. Personally, I'm infantilized enough as a small transmasc. I appreciate the intent, but your methodology is flawed.

Now to the Radoapple of it all.

You're commenting on a fandom you aren't in and know nothing about. You weren't even sure how to spell the character's name. That's not a good starting point.

Alastor is NOT canonically aromantic, though that's a common headcanon. He IS asexual, but as mentioned, it is a spectrum, and he's only shown blatant repulsion to he topic in regards to a character who is hypersexual, which could make even allos uncomfortable. The creator has given shippers her blessing to do what they will, so there's no issue there. And for the "strongest" shippers, even her disapproval wouldn't have stopped them. How often do you see straight characters made gay and gay characters made straight in fandom for the sake of a ship? That's ignoring canon characterization AND it's bi erasure and it's common as fuck and that drives me nuts but I'm getting side-tracked.

Alastor shippers are often very respectful of Alastor's identity. Some of the most common ao3 tags for Alastor are "Non-Sex Repulsed Asexual Alastor" and "Sex Repulsed Asexual Alastor". People come at his sexuality from both sides.

Radioapple in particular is one of the healthiest ships Alastor is put in, in large part because everyone is in Hell and his other big ships have a History behind them.

There's also just who Lucifer is as a person. He may b contentious with Alastor (I'll get to it) but on the whole, Lucifer is very sweet. He adores his daughter more than anything. He very blatantly misses his ex-wife who has been absent for at least 7 years. And we could all but guarantee that if he were to somehow date Alastor, if he said no sex ever, Lucifer would accept that. Partly because he's been alone without his wife for who knows how long so it's nothing new, but also how he won Lilith over in the first place.

Lilith left Adam because he demanded she be subservient. In mythology this is often boiled down to he insisted on "topping" and she refused to "bottom". She's a proud woman and would not be under anyone's control. But she met and fell in love with Lucifer soon after, so you can imagine what that may imply about him. At the very least, he showed Lilith respect and didn't make demands of her. He knows how to respect someone's boundaries. (where also, notably, Alastor's other common ship partners canonically don't. No shame on those who ship them, just making a point)

Alastor and Lucifer met on screen, and sparks flew. Literally. They were firing shots at each other. It was mostly verbal with magical flourish for visual, but it was also the first time in the series Alastor was less than composed. He'd had one big on-screen confrontation and a few small ones before that and he never lost his head or so much as swore. He said "fuck you" to the devil's face less than 5 mins into meeting him. And they got very in each other's faces. People were going to ship them.

So, this? This is why they're shipped.

On top of this, lot of fledgling aros and aces explore their identities through Alastor and shipping him in whatever ways they like. And it's fan work not official work, so where's the harm in self-exploration? A lot of even some of the nastier fanfiction is people processing trauma, which is healthy and can help those who find it too. The existence of "bad" fan work is 9 times out of 10 a good thing.

But I'm guessing you aren't so much reading as seeing drawings, but here's the thing about that: unless it's a comic, a picture is a single moment. You don't have context of the artist's perspective on his identity unless it's right there in the color palette or there's a straight up flag. You don't know if the artist respects Alastor's sexuality or not. You don't know if, hey, they find his design appealing and wanted to mess with it. At a glance you can't know. And assuming the worst, that all these artists are aphobic, is not good for you, them, or us.

Try not to jump to conclusions just because you saw a suggestive drawing.

I know this was a lot, but I hope this helps you.

not aro or ace, but whenever I see radioapple in particular, like Lucifer/Alastar or something, I forgot bro's name.

I get so fucking pissed, because it's SO popular, but I'm pretty sure Alastar is aroace and everyone keeps on excusing it on the 'aces can feel sexual attraction too' or something for aros and I just.

YEAH. Yeah I agree. I might not know the concept personally, but yeah.

But to me at least, it's never been the point of being aroace???? the, well the centre of it?????

like, to me being aroace is not feeling romantic attraction/sexual attraction

or being on the spectrum of something like that.

tbh it's a bit easier to understand the spectrum if you think it's kinda like the nonbinary spectrum.

I'm a demigirl, I can safely say I fall under that.

So....maybe ?? It's like that for aroaces too? ...sorta?

I just feel like everyone keeps on dismissing the aroace thing, just to focus on their fantasies.

Like.

I don't know following my previous thought, I see Alastor (ohhhh) kinda like Paintbrush (II)

I might not understand much, but Paintbrush is nonbinary they/them

being nonbinary is a spectrum, but their identity in particular is also the clear 100% of what you first things first think a nonbinary person is. the pinnacle, the top of a mountain.

kinda like non-diluted alcohol.

the (1)

To me Alastor has never really been stated to like ummmm....... well...... be apart of the 'Ace people can feel sexual attraction too' thing? or maybe romantic attraction for aromantics....??? I dunno

There's lots of terms tbh, arospec, acespec, I can say im nonbinary and still be a demigirl.

can acespec people say they're ace and still mean that too? bweh....

but like, yeah.

I think I always saw Alastor as like a clear no on those topics, so I've always disliked people loving to ship him....... sorryy?????????

then this sorta stuff happens irl, and I just.

feel pissed.

because it feels like weird weird weird discourse is targetted towards aro's and ace's in particular and I nfjcjcksjdcndkjd.fjcmn. if i see one more guy say weird shit about clothing being an invitation,

ugh.

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Doing Time 4

No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.

Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as noncon/dubcon, threats, age gap, and possible untagged elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: you try to keep your brother safe in jail but put yourself in danger along the way.

Characters: con/ex-con!Steve Rogers

Note: Hi hi hi

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me.

Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!) Please do not just put ‘more’. I will block you.

I love you all immensely. Take care. 💖

You don't own many dresses, and those you do, are more office casual than date night. Still, you have no time to stall, no room for excuses. You pick out the only one you think you can still squeeze into.

A button-up black dress with long sleeves, a white collar, and white trim around the sleeves and ruffled hem. It's something that would look much better on Audrey Hepburn. 

You check yourself in the mirror. You shouldn't care but you have to. If you want to get out the other side of this, if you want Vaughn to, you need to go along with it. You need to keep Steve happy. 

You emerge, as content as you can be with your appearance after a day of work and an unsettling homecoming. You keep your eyes on the floor as you wring your hands. You need heels, something to match. 

Before you can pass him, Steve stomps toward you. He pinches the frill around your skirt. "You look amazing, sweetheart." He lets go and drags his hand up your thigh and hip. "Can't believe it's the real thing, right in front of me." 

"Uh, yeah," you agree weakly. "I need shoes." 

"Sure, sweetheart, take your time. Get dolled up," he moves away with a sultry sigh. 

You feel him watching you as you shift around and search the shoe rack. You bend over to take out the black vinyl kitten heels and he purrs. You wince and stand up, wobbling as you step into them. 

"Hate to be too forward but I was away a while. Pretty lady like you has me all hot under the collar," he snickers. "Gotta say that dress hugs you in all the right places." 

"Thank you," you murmur and untangle the thin strap of a small purse. You shuffle around your work bag and slip your ID and debit card inside, along with a tube of lip balm. 

"You don't gotta be so shy," he nears. "I mean, I should be. Being locked up, I forget the way things are out here." He steps close and spreads his hand across your ass. "Just so nice to touch you...but I'll be a good boy and take you on a date first." 

You shudder and resist the urge to shove him away. You force a smile, "where are we going?" 

"Somewhere close," he answers and peels his hand off of you. "Been a while since I had a date," he snorts. "If you can't guess." 

"Me too," you mutter as you back up toward the door. You grab your keys. 

"Oh yeah? How long?" He asks as he opens the door and gestures you through. 

"How... er..." you think about it.  

You've not been on many. Vaughn always kept the men away. Even if they wanted a second date, it was never many more than that. 

"At least a year, I think," you step into the hall and he comes out after you. 

You lock the door as he stays close. You tuck the keys into your purse and he offers his hand. "Ready, sweetheart?" 

You don't hesitate. No more of that. You can't keep pushing your luck. You put your hand in his. You can feel his strength. 

He takes you down the hallway and patiently assists you down the stairs as your heels make your steps unsure. Or maybe that’s him. He’s especially gallant for someone like him. A criminal. Wait, no, he’s been absolved, hasn’t he? 

He slips his hand along your lower back as you come outside. There’s a hitch in his strut. Victory. 

“Got her out of storage, fresh wax,” he announces as he approaches the white vintage car you noticed before.

It’s strange how you can pick every single thing that’s out of place but you can never put them together. It was the same with Vaughn. 

“It’s very nice,” you say. “I don’t know much about cars, my brother...” 

You trail off. You’d rather not think or talk about him right now. 

Steve opens the passenger door for you. You get in and he lingers at your door. He purrs. 

“You really do look just perfect, sweetheart.” he tickles your jawline then draws back.  

He finally shuts you in. You shiver as you watch him through the windshield. You fix the hem of the skirt as it rides up with the two sizes you’ve put on since you bought it. Or maybe it shrunk? You pinch yourself as you do, hoping you might wake up from this nightmare. 

No, you’re already awake. Painfully so. 

Steve gets in and you peek over for just a second. The seat emphasizes his size. Everything seems to remind you of his power over you. Over your family.  

You’re so stupid. You have no one to blame but yourself. What were you thinking? Thanking a convinct? A criminal? A murderer? Or not a murderer? 

“You’re tired,” he says as he backs out, “seat belt, sweetheart. Last thing I need is an accident.” 

You buckle up. You dab your nose as it tingles. Don’t cry. You have to play this right. Pretend. 

“A little, yeah. Work...” 

“At the clinic, right?” He prompts. 

It’s like the phone calls. That familiarity he puts on. Your head spins as you replay all those nights in your head. It struck you then how presumptuous he could be. How he said ‘we’. His presence then reframes every call, every visit. They were not the same to him as you. 

“Yeah, a lot of phone call,” you swallow as your throat scratches. “People don’t like waiting.” 

“Tell me about it,” he chuckles. “After how long I waited for this...” 

You stare at his hand. Huge, thick, gripping the slender wheel. You put your eyes to your lap and play with the ruffle. 

“We’re gonna have a good night, sweetheart. You and me.” He preens. “A lot of them.” 

You nod and turn your face to the window, “yes, Steve. Thank you.” 

⛓️‍💥

The restaurant is nice. As you’re greeted at the door, Steve snakes his hand down your arm and twines his fingers through yours. As he squeezes, you realise how strange it must be to him. You shouldn’t empathize with him, not with all the threats, with how he’s taken your life over in less than an hour, but you do. 

“Table for two,” he says. 

The hostess smiles, “yes, sir. I can find you something.” 

She grabs two menus and a smaller one from the desk. She turns and leads you into the dining room. You walk just ahead of Steve as he urges you on, though his hand stays on yours. She stops you at a round table framed with a crescent bench. 

“Booth alright?” 

“Sure is,” Steve answers. 

He holds onto you until you sit. You slide around and he follows. The hostess lays out the menus. 

“Drink menu,” she points to the thinner folio, “a server will be by soon.” 

“Thank you,” you gulp out of courtesy, Steve echoing you. 

You clasp your hands in your lap as he takes the wine list and opens it. You’re not very hungry. Or thirsty. You’re scared. 

You glance at him, the around the restaurant. To the other diners, to the staff, he’s just another man. The suit hides his true character. If you passed him on the street, you’d assume he was some refined businessman. 

“Red or white?” He asks. 

You look at him again. The silver strands woven into his blond shine beneath the chandelier lighting above. You drag your hand up your sleeve. 

“You know, I’m not much of a drinker,” you murmur. 

“Well, it’s a special night, isn’t it, baby?” He drawls and closes the folder. 

He sets it down and you shift forward on the seat. He touches your lower back again, tickling you through your dress. Your posture goes rigid as you open the menu and focus on the options. He pulls his menu down, leaning it on the table’s edge as he continues to pet you, his other hand cradling the folder. 

“Steak. Mm. Been a while since I had a good filet,” he growls. 

“Sounds nice,” you nod. 

“What about you?” He wonders and traces his finger up your spine. 

“Hm, the pistachio crusted halibut sounds interesting,” you tap your nails on the page. 

“You don’t gotta peck like a bird around me,” his hand falls right back down, right along the top of your ass. “You really got a nice figure, sweetheart.” 

You fidget and flutter your lashes, “thank you. It’s not that. I was thinking... something light for dinner and the rice pilaf sounds interesting.” 

“Ah,” he trails along the cushion of your rear, “god, you’re so...” 

His voice peters off and a server appears across the table. He sits up and clears his throat. The man in his pressed white shirt and black slacks is amiable as he prompts you for your order. Steve lets you go first. You close the menu and hand it over after you order. 

“Of course, miss,” the server smiles at you. He’s young and handsome. These sort of restaurants only hire a certain type. 

“Bottle of champagne,” Steve begins, “we’re celebrating,” his arm curls around your middle, “and the New York Strip...” He finishes up his order and shoves the menu across the table. What’s that about? 

“Yes, sir, I’ll be back with the bottle and put your order in,” the server nods and glances between the both of you. 

He strides away and Steve growls. His fingertips dig into your side. He leans back and sucks his teeth. 

“Is something... wrong?” You twist to look at him. 

“That... guy. Looking at you like that,” he sneers. “He’s supposed to be taking our order, not ogling you.” 

“No, he wasn’t, Steve,” you assure him. 

“Sure as hell was. You’re just too sweet to notice. His eyes were all over you,” he huffs and his leg sways in agitation. “Judging me. Thinks I’m too old.” 

“Steve, he was perfectly polite,” you say, “please, you said it’s going to be a good night.” 

You bite your tongue as you examine his face. His sudden anger, his paranoia, unsettles you even more. His jaw ticks as he grits his teeth. 

“Steve,” you touch his sleeve, “please, I’m not here with the server, am I?” 

His blue eyes flick over to you. They search your face. You force a smile. 

You have to keep from wincing as he reaches for you. He frames your face with his large hand and grins, “you’re right, sweetheart.” He draws you closer. You let him. “All mine.” 

He meets your lips with his and you swallow a gasp. His nose brushes yours as he kisses you, softly, then his tongue glides over your lips. You resist for only a second then let him in. His hand slips behind your head as he locks you in. You brace his chest as he takes your breath away. 

“Ahem,” the server clears his throat. 

You rip away from Steve as he snickers. He wipes his mouth shamelessly as you shrink down in embarrassment. The server uncorks the bottle with a pop, his smile effortlessly hiding all judgment. He’s probably honed against all types of customers. 

He pours the bubbly and leaves the bottle. You watch him go and squirm. Steve sits up and takes his glass, “what’sa matter, sweetheart?” 

“N-nothing, I don’t-- I don’t usually do that... in public,” you sniff. 

He laughs again, “I know, you’re a good girl.” He hovers his glass. You take yours and he clinks his against it, “to us.” 

“To... us.” You echo softly. 

You drink as he does, mirroring him. It’s sweet and bubbly. He sets the glass down and reaches for the bottle. He grips it and drags it closer. 

“Only one for me, since I’m driving, so help yourself,” he says. “You deserve it. A nice night to let go.” 

“Oh, I...” you stare at the dark glass. Why did he order the whole bottle? 

He slaps his hand on your thigh and you squeak. Your hand falls over his instinctively. You look at him and lick the moisture from your lips. He growls and kneads your flesh. 

“Sweetheart,” he rasps. “Aren’t you happy? I’m here.” 

Your eyes dart back and forth, “yes, I’m happy.” 

He pushes his shoulders back and his cheek dimples, he shifts on the cushion. His other hand tugs at the top of his belt. 

“Not gonna lie, gonna be hard to hold out all night,” he smirks. “Six years...” 

You blink at him. You won’t look down. That’s too much. 

“You gonna be nice to me?” He leans in to nuzzle your cheek, tickling the back of your neck so you shiver. “Huh? I’m so pent up, baby, you gotta take it easy on me.” 

You shudder and ball your hand up tightly. Your stomach is roaring but not from hunger. The more you think about what he means, what he expects, the sicker you feel. 

“It’s been... a while for me too,” you assure him. “We can take it slow.” 

“Slow, baby?” He hums. “Oh, I don’t think I can.” 

[nerdyspies]

You're not the son I raised

nnrhahahh i dont like this oneee TT the kristen is a REALLY old sketch from may last year i think? i liked how i drew them and i didnt want it to go to waste LMAO.

honestly this is just so i can get the idea of kristen control baby out of my mind for a while ijbol TBH TBH that entire album is very fantasy high coded (fire4fun and risk risk rism are so kipperlily and riz but thats a whole other thing i could do later)

just needed to clear my mind from this so here you go tumblr erm bye

[dizzybizz]

some doodles

[bitegore]

# oh??? that also sounds so cool!!!!!, Ik for a fact that I'd play the hell out of smth like that, even tho I'm awful at combat, actually I think that'd only elevate the experience with the helplessness, anyway!!#that sounds like it'd do such a good feeling of unease and terror before the switch, and that switch would bring such an interesting crash of absolute panic down on the player when they're already in such high alert, jdgftsgbjdgduv, yeah very interesting very horrifying!!! (tags modified slightly to be a little easier to read)

Grabbing you. Talk about evil game design with me. Hi. You get it.

This is ofc one of my awful evil very-bad-no-good ocs, so I obviously know what her deal is, but the thing about the.

Well actually let me start at the beginning.

(also GOD DAMN this got wordy, so here's a cut.)

In its purely joke-level form, this started as a sort of mean-spirited jab at the spectre of the "I wish this game was in an alpine village rescuing my neighbors' cats" school of thought, which I was kind of unfairly conflating with Stardew Valley, which i was also unfairly conflating with Animal Crossing. At the time I was so sick I thought animating would be easier than drawing, so we're clear. I know those are three different games with only some vague crossover and not one coherent concept when I'm not sick, I promise, and also I don't even have anything against either of the actual games lmao. But conceptually, the idea was that - well, Erica has the demure pretty girl thing down, that's part of her character concept, that she looks like a demure pretty girl exactly as long as it takes for you to write her off as "not a threat" and then she kills you. So I was thinking to myself that it would be really funny to put Erica in a game that looked like a cozy resource management sim, and then just let her start wreaking havoc 3/4ths of the way through the game.

(That has been its own idea since forever - that most of my OCs work pretty okay as deuteragonists or primary villains, but Erica would be incapable of not coming off like a very boring side character until a late-game twist where she suddenly reveals herself to have been orchestrating all manner of problems and nursing some awful grudges behind a pleasant facade.)

Anyway the construction I came up with first was: resource management & character-driven dating sim, but then at some point, Erica starts killing characters and then she kills you and skips town. The only kind of combat system I like playing is the soulsborne-style kind that requires you to pay a lot of close attention to timing and spacing, so that's the kind of combat I was imagining. And. Well, like you said, I sure thought that it would be fun to play, actually, too.

So I settled on some mechanics.

The first part of the game is riffing very closely off games like Stardew Valley and Harvest Moon, where you have a farm, and you grow your crops and raise some animals, and then you take them into town and trade them for money and maybe points with some of the NPCs you get to interact with. You have an enemy set up - Erica's dad, petty nobility and autocrat of the town who no one likes - who will send saboteurs your way and try to price you out, but you can scare them off. There's a tutorial character (tall redhead with red sunglasses who doesn't talk much and spends most of the game writing in a notebook or making graphs; if you know my OCs you might have an idea who that is but don't worry about it!) who gives you the farm and all but demands you get into some sort of conflict with this petty noble, helps you set things up, and then generally goes about ignoring everyone and reading books while sitting around so you can click on him for tooltips if you want reminders of how the controls work. There's also a weird monster in the forest you keep hearing about and sometimes see the eyes of. Most if not all of the NPCs are neutral-to-friendly outside your established enemies, i keep going back and forth on if there should be any explicit Not-Affiliated-I-Just-Don't-Like-Outsiders characters but like there's enough going on and I want the players to get to at least the middle.

That's because, at some point about halfway through the "growing season", Erica's brother disappears off the face of the earth. The bad guy sends his cronies to run about town for a while asking the NPCs if they know anything, but the NPCs openly love you and kind of hate him, so you hear about it basically when he sends someone to your door with an apology and a letter asking you to look into it, because he cares more about his son than he does about keeping his economic stranglehold over the town or whatever. You can, like, turn this down, but if you don't, you get access to a second part of the game: PUZZLES!

(This is because the entire game is a puzzle, but we haven't gotten there yet. Kind of thing you're supposed to solve on the second playthrough.)

Anyway, Erica's brother is the first to die, but not the last. Next up is the post officer, so news can't leave town. Very scary. Then NPCs start dropping like flies but in an order that doesn't matter because I'm not introducing all of my cast here. But what you get to do is go to the scene of their (either last sighting or grisly murder), and there you get to get two pieces of "information" (old notes, 'this looks like zyx's handwriting', footprints that don't match a certain kind of shoe, etc) spelled out for you by clicking on the right items, and one puzzle you have to solve - like a cryptogram or figuring out what the code to a safe is with a note written over it - to get a third piece of information. You also get a list of 20 scenarios that might have happened, or a list of live NPCs you could blame for the murder. You have to match the right scenario to the right murder, and if you get it wrong, you only lose access to that scenario but it doesn't tell you what the correct one was, only that you were wrong, because I want to force you to do the other thing instead. Which is - if you think you know who did it, you can confront them. It'll only hurt your relationship a little, unless you're right about who it is, in which case Erica goes and does what you see above and then she KILLS YOU!!!!!!!! >:3

Well, not necessarily.

It's the kind of game where you're supposed to want to build up a relationship with the characters (so you care about them turning up dead and want to stop it from happening and all) so Erica is another character you can have conversations with, and stuff. She's actually positioned to be relatively important - she'll give you insider information if she likes you on her dad's business ventures, and she's romanceable! (But watch out.) This means that it would only be fair if I added a secret option where like.

Okay. Erica's deal is that she wants to look defanged, so that when she starts killing people, no one thinks it could possibly be her. So she watches her words, and she watches her mannerisms. Underneath that, she is a seething bloodthirsty person who hates almost everyone around her, has a ledger of slights a million incidences long she intends to repay tenfold in blood for everyone around her, and she also has the means to carry it out. What she doesn't have is a way to get away with it without someone pointing out that she did all this and it following her around. Which means: she is absolutely playing a particular role. But if you encourage her to get mean and bloodthirsty, she'll decide you like her mean and bloodthirsty because you are mean and bloodthirsty, which means... well, maybe you can be an accomplice and not a total 100% murder victim or nothing. So like. If you went the "man Erica your dad kinda sucks I think I want to kill him" route and didn't try to romance her!!!!!!!!!!!! then she'll invite you to go kill everyone in town with her actually. That's a different thing, this is long enough so I won't get into the mechanics of that one but it's a crowd rush (obviously) and designed to be a lot less Extremely Fuckhard.

But like, normalstyle, first she goes "wow omg that's such a hurtful thing to say! what's your problem :( my fucking brother is dead and you said i did it? what's WRONG with you? LOL SIKE yeah i did that shit and it was awesome. and im going to gut you like a fucking fish now" and then she hard-cut drags ydou into soulsborne-style boss combat.

She's got three phases! Uh... let me just copy-paste from my working document for this, actually, it's easier than describing it all casual. Please ignore the all-caps.

PHASE I: SPEED She is INVARIABLY FASTER THAN YOU. She has a small handful of common melee attacks that involve darting and lunging toward you. She has two less-common melee attacks where she comes close and stabs at you multiple times for combo damage, but does not block or defend herself, opening herself up to attack and knockback, which she is susceptible to. She has one rare melee where she feints and then hits you with the stick of her cane, dealing a mild bludgeoning damage but inflicting knockback, and then following up with her knife while you are dazed, dealing combo damage again. She has a dodge that triggers randomly. This phase lasts until her health is at 50%, and then the animation and then second phase is triggered. PHASE-CHANGE ANIMATION: MUH EPIC KNIFETOSS ERICA stops to inform you that she's kind of impressed, actually, she thought you'd be mincemeat by now. She then throws her knife aside, and switches her grip on her cane so that she can swing it like a bat. She does not have I-frames during this time, so she can straight up just be whacked at here. PHASE II: HAMMERTIME ERICA uses her cane as a WAR HAMMER (large, slow, blunt weapon) to deal HEAVY DAMAGE and DEBUFFS slowly. She is about half as fast as you. She has a most common melee attack that is just whacking you with her hammer. This STUNLOCKS you after a KNOCKBACK. She has a less common melee of sweeping you with the butt of her hammer, which deals KNOCKBACK, and then bringing the hammer down on you while you're stumbling in a twofer. This STUNLOCKS you. She has a least-common ranged attack that only triggers like, once per every fifteen minutes or something, where she just straight up kicks something off the ground in your direction. This is homing and cannot be dodged. It deals some minor damage but is mostly just a random thing to bother you with if you're playing ridiculously cautious. She has no dodge here. This phase lasts until her health reaches zero. PHASE-CHANGE ANIMATION: WELL NOW YOU'VE DONE IT ERICA gets annoyed and flings her hammer down, but before you can react, she is shapeshifting into her fox form. This one DOES have I-frames for coding reasons.

PHASE III: HEY GUESS WHAT IDIOT IM NOT A VAMPIRE AFTER ALL! ERICA turns into her FOX FORM, the STRANGE FOREST BEAST! This comes with a SECOND HEALTH BAR about the same size as the first, but ERICA's RESILIENCE is higher! She uses her FOX FORM as her weapon (unarmed melee is the fastest kind of weapon and she has teeth. which are basically blades). She has multiple hand grapples. She has multiple swats that deal KNOCKBACK (no stunlock). If you're really bad at dodging, she can pounce on you with both hands, which deals DEVASTATING DAMAGE, STUNLOCK, and KNOCKDOWN (not KNOCKBACK, which is a stumbling); this comes with a short period where she holds still, laughing, and you can attack her if you want. She has a mouth grapple that allows you to cheese her by utilizing the last couple seconds you have mobility to stab her through the mouth; this is very hard. The grapple deals DEVASTATING DAMAGE and inflicts BLOOD LOSS, a mechanic that only appears for this boss fight and saps your health. She can bite normalstyle, which deal HEAVY DAMAGE. She moves VERY QUICKLY because she moves at the regular speed she walks at but she is now about 5x the size of her usual sprite, which means she covers ground much faster - and she's FAST in her first phase. You have to know WHERE she's going by LEARNING HER ATTACKS or you are just FUCKED fucked. At the end of this phase, if you beat her, Erica laughs, and then collapses to the ground. WINNING the fight on the first run triggers an ANIMATION: Erica, laying down, says "Wow. I really underestimated you. You and I, we must be more alike than I thought. Fair's fair, I guess. Should've done my homework." Then she coughs and slumps. As soon as the camera is pointed away from her, there's a rustling sound, her laugh sounds, and when you turn back, she's just gone. WINNING the fight AFTER the first run triggers a different ANIMATION: ERICA, laying down, says "Ah... you've - oh, you've beaten me. Woe is me... took you long enough, but truly, I have been bested," and then she more dramatically coughs and slumps. As soon as the camera is pointed away from her, a voice line plays - she says "Sike! You don't have it in you!" and when you turn around, she's just gone.

So you see. She's kind of mean once the jig is up. She's not like that before this. But also like, even if you win you don't win. On account of this isn't the end.

Also if you don't guess that she's killing people, or you just fully ignore the entire mystery (you can get involved after the first invitation!), there's a different thing that happens. One day you come into town and everything is just on fire, and also Erica is covered in blood (see: above LOL) and holding a knife. my girl is killing people. no longer up for debate. When she sees you, unless you were doing the secret pro-murder route (which means you have to succeed at a conversation first and if you answer the wrong way she does still try to kill you) she just goes to try and kill you pretty much instantly. If you win at the conversation you get to kill everyone with her again. But either way, at the end of this one, there's still nothing to do, really. Except go home.

So you go home. Your tutorial guy is still there. He's still not talking to you. Your farm is just on fucking fire though. If you click on him, the usual tips menu is replaced with text that says something along the lines of "Tips: LOL".

There's a-- it's not a cutscene because you CAN technically interrupt by attacking them if you want, it's just a terrible plan because you'll aggro them both at once. But Erica shows up and it's basically a cutscene. She and your fucking tutorial guy (he's 'the redheaded man' on account of he never tells you a name lmfao) have a conversation that makes it very clear they were working together this entire time. Like, here's a piece of that exchange:

ERICA: You were right about schemes, turns out. ERICA: They're so rewarding to finish. THE REDHEADED MAN: Nothing like knocking down the dominos, huh? ERICA: Mm... I don't think I'd say dominos. It's too juicy. ERICA: Bringing a real mean plan into fruition. THE REDHEADED MAN: Fruit, huh. ERICA: You nurture it, watch it grow, and then when you taste it... ERICA: ...It's the sweetest thing in the world. THE REDHEAEDED MAN: You're wasted on murder. You could be a poet. ERICA: I'm multifaceted. I can do both.

Then at the end of this they agree that you're like, a perfect patsy, and fuck off to go travel the world now that someone else is going to stand accused of all their murders, since you're a stranger from out of town who showed up, openly had a conflict with the guy who ran the town, and then there were ~all those murders~. Anyway, roll credits!

Then like. There's a second thing I was thinking about and... well, honestly, almost definitely want to keep because it would be a little miserable otherwise. Which is that you can just swing a weapon at anyone at any time, but the game won't like, prompt that basically ever unless someone starts it. That's because unless you swing it at Erica or one of the enemy characters, nothing happens and they just go "[player name], what was that for? ow!" or something.

With one other exception. Which is the tutorial character, our late-game turncoat.

If you swing on THE REDHEADED MAN, he dodges and takes off his glasses. This triggers one of the only directly-triggerable voice lines. THE REDHEADED MAN: I assume that that was an accident. If you swing on THE REDHEADED MAN a second time, he dodges again and throws his hair out of his face. This triggers another voice line. THE REDHEADED MAN: What are you doing, [PLAYER]? If you swing on THE REDHEADED MAN a third time, you can actually hit him, revealing the health bar. It is fucking ridiculously huge (actually, the same amount of health as ERICA, but visible all on one bar). THE REDHEADED MAN: Are you fucking stupid, or are you smarter than I think you are? THE REDHEADED MAN: I guess we'll find out, hm? This will trigger the SECRET HAVEN FIGHT.

yeah okay that tells you his name, this is my oc Haven. in the actual story with him and Erica they DO work together to kill everyone in Erica's hometown, starting with her family but certainly not ending there; they don't quite do it like this though. Also of note is that this is the only character in the entire game who swears, because I think it's funny to have a marker on the game for profanity but it's for a route that only happens if you do something that the game doesn't tell you to do.

Anyway I haven't ironed all the mechanics of this fight out yet because I'm not sure how to make the character work while also making the fight, like... theoretically beatable. me when i have a character who likes to use mind control to tell people to hold still so he can disembowel them and then i need to make you fight them and have some way to win:

But that's what I got.

And i can't even lie. If this was a game someone else made and I could get through the resource management part without getting horribly bored I'd have such a good time with the rest of it. As long as I get the combat system right anyway.

also of note is that there's wolves who will steal your livestock and troublemakers who will steal your crops on top of the saboteurs and you can get in scuffles with them all if you want, also that there are ghost stories you can collect that are all actually about erica in her guise as The Scary Forest Monster Fox or haven/tutorial guy in weird costumes breaking into people's houses at night, there's a polyam grocer couple that wants you to be their third super badly and will bribe you for it, there is an anachronous lesbian biker gang, and you can get 'chaos jobs' that you can pick up that occasionally include 'break a window in xyz's house and we'll give you twenty bucks'. also that our tutorial guy can't be prompted to speak but, if you spend a lot of time around certain characters, has rare voice lines that trigger *eventually* that are like. mild catty insults except for erica. who he likes so he says something complimentary instead. I have a lot of things going on here.

Dont worry about it!

Stardew Valley-inspired Erica animation, drawn sometime in January while I was sick as a dog. This took ages, and all because I wanted to animate the bloodstains moving properly. The framerate isn't even quite right lol.

[nabaath-areng]

I have way too many alts that I keep to myself (which is why I generally refrain from posting them), but I'm going to ignore that habit for a moment just because I'm feeling particularly insane about this guy.