#... I added ONE exclamation point line to the monologue. And then I tried to end every sentence in this post with an exclamation mark.

[chemicalarospec]

This little monologue has ruined the whole scene! Because I'm not going run it without it but I'd rather not leave it in, even though it's super in-character, because of the tone dissonance.

(Context is that L has said "Light, if you wish to become more of a gentleman, I can teach you.")

If I say no, I have no interest in self improvement — a Kira-like trait —, but Kira would say yes to avoid suspicion and comply with L regardless. He knows I have neither a strong interest in nor aversion to gentlemanhood, so I can't simply reject his offer outright because I'd hate the lessons… but they'd take up so much time that I'd rather spend scheming. He has me cornered -- I have to accept! However, a lack of strong interest means it is also not in-character for me to jump on an offer which was phrased to put the burden of interest on me. How to best accept in a mild manner that is also not Kira-like..? I can't say "I'd like that" because it would be a lie and lying is a Kira-like trait. "That sounds nice, Ryuzaki," Light said. 

Pov fix and quotation marks because even though I'm saying it "ruined" it, I totally wanna branch out a whole new fic from this scene hehe.

I tried doing an overthinking-monologue in Light's fic and now I think I may have to cut the whole scene for tone haha (and make into a separate fic, of course). I've never cut for tone before (and tbh Demolition Duo suffers a little from it) -- if I'm writing a Normal scene in an Angst fic but my brain goes "wouldn't it be funny if..?" I usually just leave the Funny in.

[stitch1830]

Bets

Happy Mondangst! Here's some angsty Kantoph :)

......

“Da.”

“That’s right, baby girl!” he cheered in his most ridiculous baby voice. “Da da! Da da!”

Lin giggled in her father’s arms, and Toph jokingly scoffed at the two from the couch. She lay on her back with her hands behind her head, enjoying the vibrations of the two through the ball of her foot that she kept firmly on the ground. “You two are giving me a headache.”

“C’mon, Toph! It’s Lin’s first word, how can you hate this?”

“First off, she’s babbling. It’s not even words yet. Second, the fact that she’s making ‘D’ sounds instead of ‘M’ is the other reason.” she explained simply. “If she says ‘Dada’ before ‘Mama,’ that’s betrayal right there.”

“Sorry, Angel. I just have that effect on women, I guess.”

“Gross,” she complained, but pointed a smile at him, and she felt his heart quicken ever so slightly and his voice let out a quiet chuckle at their antics.

And when his gaze turned back to Lin, Toph could feel through the earth how at peace he was at that moment. Complete adoration for their baby, and she silently laughed to herself at the thought of him having to deal with Lin as a teenager. Oh, she would have him wrapped around her finger for all of eternity, Toph just knew it.

His voice broke up her thoughts. “Hey, what if we had a little competition?”

Toph said nothing, but raised an eyebrow at him, prompting him to continue. “What if we compete to find out who Linny walks to first?” he asked.

“What are the stakes?”

“If I win, we start trying for another baby.”

“Are you out of your fucking mind?” she laughed.

“And if you win, Lin’s our only perfect little girl.”

“And if she doesn’t walk to either of us??”

“Then we let fate and destiny take over,” he answered rather smugly.

Toph smirked and sat up from her position, ready to playfully protest this silly competition. “You realize that she’s gonna walk to you, right?”

“We don’t know that.”

“Right,” she responded sarcastically. “Lin, the little Daddy’s girl who shares the same birthday as her Baba and whose first words are gonna be ‘Dada’ and ‘Baba.’”

“Mama could be a close third,” he defended.

“Yeah, sure. I’m going to shake on a bet I’m bound to lose.”

“Just a little fun,” he replied, and she could hear the grin in his voice. “Obviously we’ve got time, but, I don’t know. I think it could be fun!”

“You and I have two very different definitions of fun,” she teased.

“But it’s harmless!”

“Harmless?” she laughed. “I could end up fat and pregnant at the end of this!”

“Only if you want to,” he added.

“So this isn’t even a bet at all,” she commented. “It’s just fake stakes on the table.”

She felt him shrug. “Bit of pride on the line, I suppose. What do you say?”

Toph wanted to continue berating him and teasing him, but his heart sang whenever Lin made a noise or reached out for something, and he adored playing little games like this with her. Perhaps deep down in a place that she barely allowed to admit to herself, she could imagine them having another baby. Even if Lin was almost 6 months old, she thought that maybe, just maybe, a family of four would be nice. And when Lin giggled at her father once again, Toph’s resolve to say no to those two disappeared.

Spirits, they had her whole heart, and she couldn’t help but shake her head as she smiled and extended her hand out to him.

“It’s only a bet if we shake on it.”

His silly cheer caused Lin to giggle more, and after he shook Toph’s hand to signify the start of the bet, he playfully kissed each knuckle before Toph mildly complained as she tried to free herself from his grasp.

~~~

They sat on her living room floor, engaged in small talk while they paid attention to Lin’s every move. The elephant koi in the room became a semi-permanent resident in the Beifong house, but everyone learned to live with it, Toph especially.

Sokka carefully treaded every conversation as he supported Lin to standing on her own two feet. Every now and again, his gaze would turn up to Toph to catch her expression. Today it was unreadable, but she sat on the floor with her legs out and leaned back on her arms, a sign of openness.

That was a good sign, right?

The warrior never knew what was good and what wasn’t anymore, because everything reminded them of him. Of Kanto.

And it was unfair, because Toph deserved to go about her life without having to be constantly reminded of the man she loved and lost to a crazy person. But there was no escape; Kanto was at her place of work, at their home, and he was there whenever Lin moved or breathed or learned something new.

None of that seemed to matter to the universe, however, and Toph and Lin and everyone else that loved Kanto lived with the reminder like chronic pain: constant, relentless.

Still, Toph’s body language was more positive than usual, so Sokka took the opportunity to strike up another small conversation.

“So,” he began by clearing his throat. “What do you and Lin have planned for the rest of the day?”

His friend shrugged in response and a nonchalant wave. “Eh, same old shit, Sokka. Maybe I’ll take her to the park. It is a nice day out.”

“How come you only call me Sokka, now?”

Toph shot him a confused look. “Because it’s your name??”

The man rolled his eyes to himself then said, “Well, yeah. I just mean you almost always called me ‘Meathead’ or ‘Snoozles’ or ‘Captain Boomerang.’”

A quiet scoff fell from Toph’s breath, and she dug her knuckles into her earthen floor. “Yeah, well nicknames are for fun times, and I haven’t been in a jovial mood as of late—”

“Toph I just mean—”

“So forgive me if I don’t feel the need to call you by some dumb nickname that reminds me of all the other stupid ones I called him.”

Sokka shut his mouth, but still held onto a bouncing Lin and stared at Toph. Her expression contorted into one of regret, and she let out a tired sigh.

“I’m sorry, Sokka. That was rude.”

“No, Toph, it’s okay,” he reassured her. “I just—”  Sokka paused before he continued. What he wanted was to help his friend and hoped she would return to her old self soon.

But the idea seemed silly after a second thought. How could she go back to her old self? Going back wasn’t an option, only forward, to a different Toph Beifong who loved and lost and learned to adapt to this difficult change.

So instead of saying I just want to help you get back to your old self, he amended his statement. “I just want to help you.”

“I know,” she sighed again as she moved to lie down on the ground. “I know you’re all trying to help.”

And Toph did know that. The whole group seemed bent over backwards in helping her through this mess of her life, and she not only wanted, but needed their help. However, figuring out things that did help seemed to be a challenge, for it all required talking or thinking about him.

She really couldn’t do that at this point, not even nine months after his death.

Saying his name sent her down a spiral of thoughts of longing and regret, the feeling so strong that it tempted her to visit their bedroom again. But she hadn’t stepped into that room since she was dragged out by Sokka, because she wasn’t sure she’d have the strength to leave it a second time.

Instead of visiting their shared bedroom or speaking her dead almost-fiancé’s name or figuring out what could possibly help her through this, she lay on the ground, focusing on the earth’s humming while blocking out all other erratic and uneven vibrations. It was soothing, being completely one with the earth and ignoring everything else. Her mind wasn’t racing, her heart wasn’t hurting, and she felt a feeling that strangely resembled tranqui—

“Toph?”

Her focus was broken, and as annoyed as she was, Toph responded to her friend and asked, “What is it?”

“Are you okay?”

“Stupid question.”

“I just mean—”

“Mama!”

Lin’s interruption pulled Toph further from the earth, and so she waved her hand in the air and exclaimed, “Mama’s right here, Lin. Just wallowing in self-pity as a widow does, although I’m not even sure I can call myself that.”

“Toph,” Sokka began, but Toph continued her useless ramble. “Probably not, since he didn’t even ask me to marry him. Kind of a requirement to be in the mopey widow club, don’t you think? Pathetic, really, I don’t even have a dead fiancé, just a dead baby daddy.”

“Toph—”

“You know what, guess it doesn’t matter I could just—”

“Toph!”

Sokka’s exclamation startled her, but she didn’t move from her spot. She waited for him to continue with whatever was so important to interrupt her self-deprecating monologue, but he didn’t speak again.

Instead, she felt little, uneven, and heavy footsteps toddle toward her. Toph sat upright in an instant, completely shocked at the sensation of Lin walking.

“Go Lin!” Sokka cheered.

Toph cheered as well and held her hands out excitedly to catch her daughter. “C’mere, Lin! You got it!”

And with a few babbles and shouts for Mama, Lin made her way into Toph’s arms.

The earthbender pulled Lin in for a tight hug and smothered her cheek with kisses. “You did it, baby girl! You took your first steps!”

“She’s a natural, Toph! Gonna be running tomorrow,” Sokka teased.

Toph grinned at the thought, and moved to balance Lin’s tiny feet on her knee. She felt Lin squirm in her arms and crane her neck, as if she was looking for someone.

“Dada.”

And with a single exclamaion of Lin’s favorite word, Toph’s heart shattered just as quickly as it soared a moment ago.

…….

Sokka’s grin faded slowly with Toph’s as he watched her realize what Lin wanted. In a second, one of the greatest feelings and feats of Toph’s baby girl turned into a situation of pure grief. And All he wanted was for his best friend to have a single fucking moment not be ruined by the memory of losing Kanto.

But that was impossible. Every accomplishment was tainted with this memory, and there was nothing to do but accept that harsh reality.

He watched Toph suddenly become overwhelmed by the grief. She bit her quivering lip as she combed through Lin’s hair over and over, fixating on a few curly strands at the top of her head.

They stayed like that for what felt like an eternity, all the while Lin kept asking for her dad. Sokka was about to intervene, but then Toph let out a quiet breath and answered Lin.

“Yeah, Lin. Dada would be so proud of you right now.” She formed a small, sorrowful smile at Lin while tears fell down her cheeks. “I’d rub it in his face, too.” Toph choked out a chuckle, then continued, “But Baba isn’t here anymore, baby girl. It’s just you and me.

“Don’t worry, kiddo. All your aunts and uncles will be around to bother us, especially this Meathead over there, okay?”

When she pointed a finger at Sokka, Lin turned to see, and smiled at him. And Sokka found himself grinning back at Lin for only a second. For when he turned his gaze to Toph, he saw her tear-stricken face and any signs of happiness left Sokka’s face.

He saw Toph hastily wipe at her eyes, then stood up with Lin in her arms. “Thanks for uh, coming by, Sokka. But Lin and I are gonna spend some time together alone.”

She walked out into the backyard before he could even protest.

Sokka didn’t move from his spot, however. He just sat there, thinking and wondering and hoping there was something he could do to help his friend. But she was a silent sufferer, carrying the burden of grief everywhere she went and barely let on what hurt the most about it all. As a bystander, it hurt Sokka to see her shoulder it all. What was he to do, though?

He let out a tired sigh. Sometimes there was nothing to do but be there, even if it made him feel useless.

……

“You’re  a terrible listener.”

Sokka ignored her jab and sat down next to her, Lin bouncing gleefully in her spot in front of her mother. He gave her elbow a light nudge and replied, “I know, but I know you don’t actually want to be alone.”

“I just said—”

“Listen, Toph. We don’t have to talk about it, about any of it. But you’re like me, okay? I don’t like talking about what’s bothering me, but that doesn’t mean solitude is the answer.”

Toph bit her lip as she considered the offer, but made no outright objections to his presence. So they sat there, silent and contemplative about everything and nothing in particular.

It wasn’t until minutes of silence (and little babbles and single words from Lin) that Toph finally spoke. She chose her words carefully, as if saying the wrong thing would send her down a rabbit hole of despair. But Sokka watched her and steadied her with a reassuring hand to her shoulder.

Toph gave a sad smile as she spoke and played with Lin’s wavy hair. “We, uh, we made a stupid bet.

“He liked these silly games and it made him so fucking happy, I didn’t think twice about them. And it gave us a reason to be competitive, and you know how we would get with this shit. Still, they were harmless.”

She hastily wiped her eyes then continued, “But then he wanted to have a bet on who Lin would walk to first, and he said that if Lin walked to him, we’d try for another baby. If she walked to me, no more kids.”

Toph let out a sorrowful chuckle as she slightly hung her head low and let the tears fall in her lap. Sokka’s eyes grew misty at the thought. A silly bet turned into a reminder for Toph, and it felt cruel.

But then Toph took in a deep breath and brought her head back up, pointing her gaze toward the warrior. “You know what’s even crazier? I was gonna let him win. Under the illusion I was upset, of course.”

Sokka softly chuckled at that.

Lin cried out and turned to face Toph, who gently rubbed her daughter’s chubby cheeks. Sokka still sat there, hand on Toph’s shoulder, and watched through his blurred vision his best friend continue to open up to him.

She sighed again. “I’d let him win all the silly games if it meant—”

Her sentence was left unfinished, but nothing else needed to be said. Toph pulled in Lin to an embrace, breathing deeply into her hair as the gravity began to weigh heavy on the pair.

Toph mindlessly played with Lin’s soft curls. “But I guess all bets are off, or I win them all now.

“I don’t feel like the winner, though, Sokka.”

Sokka’s grip tightened on Toph’s shoulder as his sign of support, because he truly had no words. All he could do was sit and stare and hope that there would be something on the horizon to look forward to.

And yet, in that very same moment, he couldn’t help but silently admire Toph’s strength. Her ability to carry on and raise Lin while facing practically an insurmountable amount of grief was something that couldn’t be overlooked. He’d seen his friend show great feats of strength and resilience in the past, but in the back of his mind, he thought that perhaps this was the greatest one of all.

Still, he’d be damned if he was going to let her face this mountain on her own. So they sat there silently once again as Sokka’s hand remained on her shoulder, reminding her that he was there no matter what. He would be there to help her and to hold onto her through it all.

She deserved that. She deserved that and much more, but this was their reality. It would have to do.

[minimalexertion]

Chapter 5

On Your Own

Chapter 5 - On Your Own

Step 8 - Do Your Job

Congratulations! You have finished the basics of dimension traveling, and now you must pave your own path. No doubt that it will be fraught with danger and near-death experiences, but you have mastered the basics so now nothing can step in your way! The rest of this book will be filled with tailor-made tips and tricks from your protector eorum on what to do in a couple of strange situations specific to your dimension.

With that, we, the council of infinitum, bid you good luck on your mission.

Tazuna, the bridge-builder whose name I suddenly remembered, then burst into a monologue about the situation his town was in, and being the type of person with an attention span of a 7 year old child, I immediately zoned out, fiddling with my fingers as if they were the most interesting thing to ever exist. There were more important things to think about that Tazuna's sob story, like how to stop Zabuza and Haku from dying, how to brush off accusations from Sasuke, Sakura, Naruto and Kakashi, and most importantly, how to make it to the end of the story-line.

I blanched as I realised Naruto's face was right in front of me, his nose a few millimetres from mine, as he asked, "Yo, [f.name]. Can you see if I become Hokage with your fortune-telling? I'm totally the Hokage in the future, right?" There were several things that happened after Naruto asked that:

1. I screamed. 2. Naruto screamed. 3. I slapped Naruto in the face. 4. Naruto screamed louder. 5. I screamed. 6. Sakura screamed. 7. Kakashi sighed.

Sasuke could feel his eyebrow twitch in frustration at the sight of the [colour] haired girl apologising profusely to Naruto, the latter sporting a large red hand-print on the side of his face. His usual scowl painted on his face, Sasuke slouched further into himself, wanting for this mission to be done and over with, as if he was the only one that wished for that.

You had stopped apologising to Naruto after the 15th time, before pondering whether or not to answer his question, 'If I tell Naruto that he will be Hokage, would he still work as hard as he did in the anime series? Or will he slack off?' Deciding that you liked, and I quote, 'A little sprinkle of drama in your life,' You just replied with a vague, "Eh, maybe. Maybe not. The future can change and the spirits haven't told me that, yet."

Naruto looked a bit too pleased at your vague answer, Sakura was struggling to keep a neutral face after nearly spluttering out a 'what', Kakashi merely looked amused, whilst Sasuke still had that annoying smirk on his face. You swore that one day. One day. You would wipe that condescending smirk off his face.

"Oh yeaaaahhh! Did you hear that, Sasuke?! I going to be the Hokage in the future." Naruto bragged, jumping around excitedly. Your [colour] eyes widening as you thought, 'I think I can see his ego inflating.'

"[f.name]-chan literally said maybe, Naruto!" Sakura interjected punching said boy in the back of the head, which then instantly halved Naruto's ego.

Just before Naruto was about to retort, no doubt with his phrase 'believe it', Sasuke quickly cut in, his voice cold and mocking, "If anyone is going to be Hokage, it's going to be me, you idiot."

"That's not true, you bastard!"

You turned to Sakura, "Does this usually happen? Or is this like a once in a blue-moon sort of thing?"

Sakura only replied with a tired sigh, and by doing so, answered your question. With a teary face, you pat Sakura on the shoulder reassuringly, "I'm sorry, Sakura. I don't know how you live with this. But, now. I'm here to help you live through this. Let's get through this together."

Thus, the greatest friendship between two people was born, out of the necessity to live and survive with the idiotic rivalry between their two teammates.

"Thank you for taking us this far." Tazuna said, as the 6 of us disembarked from the the small vessel. The boat driver nodded, waving goodbye as he slowly disappeared out of sight.

You stretched your legs, the cramps from sitting down for too long finally getting to you. You sighed in content, feeling the satisfying crack of your shoulders and knees as you elongated your limbs and contorted your body into weird shapes. Sakura giggled at your antics whilst Sasuke and Naruto continued to butt heads.

Walking down the dirt path, Sakura and you bonded over training techniques as she taught you about the basics of being a ninja. In other words, it had been a few months since you had arrived in Naruto's dimension but only now had you started to learn the basics of being a ninja, Ninja 101 if you will. Apparently, the fact that Naruto had done nothing in the past attack weighed heavily on his mind, as he mindlessly threw kunais in a couple of directions in an effort to not be outdone by Sasuke.

"Hey, Naruto! Stop trying to show off!" Sakura berated.

"Don't use kunai knives so carelessly, Naruto!" Kakashi added.

But to your amusement, Naruto immediately threw another kunai knife in another direction only to find a petrified white rabbit. As you stood there nonchalantly, watching Naruto cuddle this terrified poor bunny, you looked at one of Naruto's kunai knives that had struck the ground next to your feet, missing out on Kakashi's warning of, "Get down!"

You bent down slowly to pick it up, thinking, 'Huh, these don't look that hard to throw. But, you know what would be cool to have in this world? A gun. I would like a gun.' Feeling the sudden rush of air fly above you, you stood back up, only to jolt at the sight of a massive sword stuck in a tree with a half-naked, masked man perched on top of it. 'Wait, what the fuck did I just miss?'

"Ah, if it isn't the Rogue Ninja of the Hidden Mist, Zabuz-"

With absolutely no tact in mind, you spoke cutting off Kakashi's introduction of this peasant secondary character, "Having leg-warmers and arm-warmers without a shirt is just a contradiction you know. Make up your mind, are you cold or what?"

"[f.name]! This isn't the time to joke around." Sakura hurriedly whispered out.

"Nevermind that, just get into Manji battle formation and protect Tazuna!" Kakashi ordered, his hand reaching up to unmask his other eye. Sakura, Sasuke and Naruto quickly formed around Tazuna.

You blinked slowly, before whispering to yourself, "They don't teach you this Manji formation shit in college." As you turned to protect the rear, continuing on to say to the others, "I've got all your backs, because no one has the heart to tell me where to stand."

Slipping off your footwear once again, you ignored Sakura's exclamation of, “[f.name], this isn't the time to worry about your shoes!" Placing the shoes next to you, you got into your own battle stance, closing your eyes to try and focus on the vibrations through the earth.

In other words, you attempted to pull off Toph's seismic sense. Granted, your were not that great at it, but if could help in this situation where you knew this half-naked man would create a thick fog in an effort to blind all of you. As you closed your eyes, you feel Zabuza leave his perch on the tree, and Sakura gasping out a, "Where did he go?" 

Sighing, you opened your eyes to the sight of a thick fog before praying quickly in your head, 'To whatever higher being exists, I beg of you to please let this shit pass quickly. Please.' 

My prayers were apparently not heard, as there were a few expositional points we had to get through, like what is the Sharingan, what is Zabuza's fucked up back story, what Kakashi's Sharingan could do, what the bingo book is, etc..

Zoning out for most of it, I jolted when Zabuza's voice cut through the mist, "Eight points."

"Huh, what's that?" Sakura asked, her green eyes flickering around trying to place down where Zabuza was.

Zabuza's reply was calm, "The larynx, the spine, the lungs, the liver. The jugular and the subclavian arteries. The kidneys, the heart. Now then, which vulnerable spot would be good?"

Piping up, I quickly cut in, "Uh, not to be such a Debbie downer, but I prefer literally none of those. I think any of us prefer those methods. I would like to die peacefully in my sleep, thank you very much."

I was ignored to the nth degree.

Visibly drooping, I started to only focus on keeping Zabuza far away from Tazuna, which was rather successful since the ground just happened to get super slippery whenever Zabuza got too close, or when a random wall of earth popped out to force Zabuza to change directions, or the fact there just happened to be a ball of fire staring him straight in the face when he nearly succeeded.

I watched with a blank look on my face as Zabuza and Kakashi played a game of 'Which one of us is the real one?' Blinking slowly, I observed Kakashi get stuck in a ball of water, snickering quietly at the distortion the ripples created of his face. As Naruto and Sasuke teamed up to attempt to take down Zabuza's water clone as Sakura and I kept an eye on Mr President [Tazuna's new nickname which I came up with in the past 10 minutes], I turned to Sakura, "Sakura, what I'm about to do is very dangerous. So first of all, do not try this at home. Secondly, please make sure that Zabuza doesn't decide to go ape shit on us and kill me from behind. Got it?"

When Sakura gave me a quick nod, I stepped forward and took a deep breath. Focusing on the water prison that Kakashi was in, I tried to find a way to grasp onto it, just a sliver of water just so I can break this prison open. I could feel a grin split my lips, as I chuckled. 'There it is, my opening.'

Earth-bending skills: 8 out of 10

Knowledge of ninja basics: 2 out of 10

Probability of survival: 46.32%