#*my boy is becoming an entrepreneur*

[userverstappen]

danielricciardo: Been workin’ on some fiiiine fine wines.

[octuscle]

Browth Spurt

Martin, Michael and Christian were interns at promaxx, one of the fastest growing venture capitalists. promaxx specialized in biotech, and the board's dream was to find the first unicorn capable of bionically optimizing humans.

"If they were able to do that, they hadn't done a good job on themselves," Martin whispered to Michael. He had to stifle a laugh. There were indeed a couple of rather ridiculous-looking nerds in the "growth spurt" presentation. They were talking about a combination of pills and autogenic training, which was supposed to unleash undreamt-of powers in men. There was actually a pile of CDs and a few packets of pills on the table in front of them. Images of men screaming "Alpha" from every pore flickered across the projector.

The promaxx product manager had either heard Martin or read his mind. In any case, he asked why the young men didn't look like the ones whose images had just been projected onto the wall. One of the start-up nerds, who weighed a maximum of 70 kilograms at around 200 cm tall, began to stammer that they weren't quite sure yet what the side effects on the psyche would be and that their minds were, after all, the company's greatest asset. Christian, who has always been a bit cheeky, laughed and said that this might not be a good starting point for entering the market. The product manager gave him a high five and added that he was not interested in hearing more, he was sure that everyone present could do better with their time, the meeting was over.

The start-up entrepreneurs from "growth spurt" stood there with their mouths open. They had expected everything, but not such an early termination. The product manager left the room without saying goodbye. Martin and Christian followed in his footsteps. Only Michael stayed for a moment, tried some comforting small talk and then left. The nerds packed up their things in disappointment and left the meeting room.

"Why were you still talking to the losers? "Christian asked Michael. Christian opened his jacket and took out a pack of tablets and three CDs. "That's why," he said with a grin. "We'll see what this stuff is worth now. And if it can become a unicorn, we can say we've discovered it."

That evening, the three boys lay in their beds. The tablets with a glass of water on the bedside table. The CD inserted in a player. They had all had to search a little to find something that could play this ancient media. The three of them chatted on their chatroom.

Michael: Have you already Martin: Nope Christian: Nope Michael: I've put the CD in, but I can't hear a thing. Christian: Same here. Martin: I've swallowed the pill! Michael: Okay, me too now Christian All for one, one for all! …

Christian fell into a deep sleep relatively quickly. His boner built an impressive tent in his bed. At some point during the night, he had a wet dream and blew an incredible load. And then once again. And then once more. And then he woke up.

Christian: Shit, are you awake? Christian: Shit, shit, shit! Michael: Bro, it's 05:00. A bit early for the gym. Martin: You say, weakling! I've been up for half an hour doing push-ups and squats.

Christian sits up. He burped. Must be from the pills. Like the puddle he had slept in. And that body that had torn his pyjamas to shreds. Martin sent a photo of a monstrous bicep with the comment "Then I'll see how I can get it to burn." Something was different. But Christian didn't know what…

Christian: Bros, I must have overdone it a bit, I don't fit into my clothes anymore. Michael: Same here, bros, had to train naked. Shit, my cock rubs against the floor during the push-ups and doesn't get limp at all. Martin: I was just at my brother's. His clothes fit me reasonably well. I'll pick you up and bring you something.

Christian went into the shower. His three-day beard went perfectly with his dark complexion. No need to shave today. His parents were still closing up when Michael and Martin pulled up outside the house. Christian opened the door, naked as God had made him. "You're a fucking statue, bro," Martin said as he handed him a pile of clothes. Christian posed. The light from the hall lamp cast his shadow on the early morning street. The milkman gawked. And almost had an accident.

"So, bro! We think you should think again about the nerds from yesterday," Michael said to the promaxx product manager. He just looked at them. He didn't notice any change. The three junior managers looked impressive as always. The fact that they called him "bro" flattered him. "Sorry, big boys, but the rejection is already out."

Christian looked at his bros and asked, "Do you think what I think?" "Shit, when I see you, I always think the same thing, stud!" said Martin. He obviously wasn't wearing any underpants. And he was leaking plenty of precum. "Michael grabbed his crotch and said "Let's fuck the guys from "growth spurt". Christian grinned. "At least there's one here who hasn't fucked his brains out or swapped them for brawn."

The three of them had quite a problem getting into the Uber. The driver said that with three guys that big, he would definitely need a gas surcharge for being overweight. The three boys laughed uproariously as if it was a good joke. They liked it when people admired them. And they were indeed admirable. "Stop, Taxi-Bro," yelled Mike. They had just passed a store selling gym gear. "We need to get in there quickly," he added. "Dude, you're a lifesaver," said Chris and gave him a fist bump. Martin's brother's suits were just too tight. And you couldn't show them off. And the sun was shining. Sun's out, guns out. Their motto is college days. Hehehe, they didn't do much other than hang out in the sun on campus. They were living proof that you could build a career on good looks alone.

"Damn, don't you think you should at least cover your nipples?" asked the Uber driver. "And what the hell is so smelly here?" Martin let his pecs dance in the back seat. "Bro, don't talk, drive! In tank tops, my monster pecs are like prison!" And in the passenger seat, Mike crossed his arms behind his head in such a way that the driver almost fell into the bush in his armpit. "Stink? All I smell is man musk". Christian farted a huge protein fart. "Not only musk, bro." The three bros laughed. The driver stepped on the gas, hoping the tip would compensate for at least some of the pain this ride was causing him.

The CEO and CFO of "growth spurt" looked helplessly at the three men, who could barely get anything past their lips apart from "dude", "bro" and "sick big muscles". The guinea pigs they had experimented with so far had also developed a powerful sex drive and tyrannized all the other reference animals. But at least they hadn't been tattooed and had smelled like a gym locker. Mike, Chris and Martin would make great advertising characters after all. Maybe they'd be able to collect equity that way. And they would need it. At least now they had three extra mouths to feed with a massive appetite for cum and protein.

Pics made @ki-kink

[writteninlunarlight-years]

@literallurker gave me this idea, and I wanted to share my headcanons on what I think everyone's MBTI is and why I believe that.

Charlie -ESFJ (Consul)

I mean, come on, this is so Charlie-coded. She loves helping people and putting a smile on their faces. She gets enjoyment and fulfillment from helping her people and those who lean on her the most. She is extroverted, in touch with her emotions, and in touch with others' emotions as well.

Vaggie -ISTJ (Logistician)

Vaggie respects how things should be run; look at how she reacts to Lucifer's appearance. She, however, is undeniably loyal and follows her heart when it comes to the one she cares about the most. She is quiet and reserved, only stepping up to the plate when it involves backing up Charlie.

Lucifer -ENTP (Debater)

Let's look at Lucifer's past, present, and seeming future. In the past, Lucifer questioned many things and wanted to know why and find out why things were how they were. Lucifer is a good leader when he is not depressed, he also shows pretty normal Extrovert traits he is just awkward cause he dedicated so much of his life to one person not the collective. We saw at the end of the show his true kingly and debater personality show where he agreed to help stick it to the angels and help Charlie.

Alastor - ESTP (Entrepreneur)

This man is a business tycoon, can we all agree? He has thousands of souls. He is a smooth talker and great at making deals. He has to be extroverted for that. On top of that, the only time we see this man dwell on his past is when he talks about his contract at the very end. Besides that, he is rooted in how he can benefit himself right here, right now. He also knows how to manipulate the situations he is in to benefit himself, something the Entrepreneur type is known for.

Angel Dust - INFP (Mediator)

Okay, hear me out, Angel is an actor; the Angel we see 90% of the time is not the real true him. When we see him in his raw form, he is really quiet and calm. He spoke of dreams and ideas he once had. Angel is forced to look extroverted when, in reality, he is the happiest in a small group of close people. He is happy making his friends happy. He loves helping even if he covers it up with his 'need' for sex and drugs.

Husk - INFJ (Advocate)

Okay, controversial, I know, but let me cook. Husk in the show fits this so well. He is compassionate towards Angel and the others, he is wanting to rebel against the contract system, he doesn't care about being powerful anymore now that he has lost all power. He is just a boy who loves his spider and friends. He has no issues helping Charlie the minute he finds out he was summoned for her, not Al.

Sir Pentious -INTP (Logician)

Man is socially awkward and inventing stuff left, right, and sideways. He is always curious to build the next best thing to make him the next powerful being. He never falters from his passion, either. He is passionate about the tasks he is given, which explains his displeasure in failing the Vees. Yet when Charlie gives him a new task, and he can excel at that, he is as happy as ever.

Niffty - ISTP (Virtuoso)

We have literally seen Niffty create the most horrid and cutest things out of her bugs. She is very attached to those she is close to, and she always has something going on in her mind. I think Niffty is a prime example of if it is in my head, I will be doing it, no questions asked.

Cherri Bomb - ENFP (Campaigner)

Cherri is the definition of a free spirit and a kind heart. She loves Angel deeply and would do anything to help cheer up her best friend. On top of that, she also has a no fucks filter and kicks ass to protect those she cares about. She is open and honest about her life style and her energy. Ready to take on the world one day at a time the best way she can.

Sera - INTJ (Architect)

Sera follows the rules and becomes the best she can be. She was given the directive of being the head angel and ran with it. She will do anything to keep her power and knowledge of the world. She is very smart and analytical when it comes to situations. Though she is in a powerful position, she is naturally introverted, often letting Emily take on more people-centric roles while she stands back and takes on more law and order roles.

Emily - ENTJ (Commander)

All right, this is more of what I just hope Emily becomes. In the span of minutes, we watched Emily completely turn her back on fellow Angels, all because she had learned what was really happening in hell. She would fight for the right cause and rally the troops for it. She is an energetic and open character who fights for what she believes is right. Seeing Pentious get redeemed, you bet she will be fighting for Charlie's plans.

Lute - ISFJ (Defender)

Okay, another may be controversial, but let me cook, please. Lute is super caring and concerned for her people, whether that is Adam, the exorcists, or angels as a whole. Yes, she looks like a big bad villain in the show because, well, she is. However, step into Lutes' shoes, and she is just trying to protect the peace of her people and family.

Adam - ENFJ (Protagonist)

He is another person who hear me out please needs to be looked at from his perspective. Adam is, by all means, the main protagonist in the Bible and in the world of heaven. He does what he believes is right and fights for what he believes is right. Even if he is an asshole, look at him from a different perspective than just through the eyes of Charlie, our narrator, through Hazbin Hotel. Adam believes his greatest purpose in life is to be the first man everyone has to look up to.

Vox -ESFP (Entertainer)

I mean, this is like writing itself; Vox is charismatic, has silver tongues, and is good with people. He can use his voice and charisma to woo people, and only then, if that fails, does he use his hypnotic powers. Vox enjoys entertaining by playing many roles in all his shows and assisting Vel and Val in any issue that seems to come up.

Valentino - ESTJ (Executive)

Hear me out, let me cook; we learn in should have stayed gone that Vox is pretty much powerless without the other Vee. It is also alluded to a few times that Val has been there the longest out of all the Vees. To be in the position of power Val is in, he needs to be an extrovert and have a way with words to lure people in. You may be thinking, but how does this tie into the executive role. I ask you to take a step back, like with the angels, and look at Val from the perspective of the Vees, not from Charlie and the narrators. He is set in his ways, expects perfection from his soul, and utilizes his power position as a form of mentorship for Vox and Vel so they can gain more notoriety.

Velvette - ISFP (Adventurer)

But she is a famous designer and sinstagram star. Yeah, and do you know how many influencers and social media people are actually introverts but come off as extroverted cause they are talking to a camera, not people directly. She is also suuuuper creative, and many fashion designers, just like other artists, have a hard time relating to people face to face and prefer to talk through their art mediums. I mean, look at how Velvette handled Val's tantrum. She called Vox cause she didn't know how to handle that situation.

[suckerforprettyboys]

illicit affairs- g.hawthorne

in which a simple interview starts fierce rumors of a secret romance.

wc: 1.3K

my inbox is open for requests! xoxo

The backstage room was cloaked in an awkward silence, broken only by the distant echoes of the camera and make-up crew doing their last minute touches. You, a well known and respected interviewer, were sitting patiently waiting for your interviewee to enter the room. You had your papers neatly stacked, hair perfectly set how you liked it, and a bright smile ready. 

Interviews were nothing new for you, it was quite literally your job, but today’s interview would be rather difficult in comparison to the usual interviews. You were interviewing a well known businessman and entrepreneur, the heir to the Hawthorne fortune: Grayson Davenport Hawthorne. 

Your mind is sucked from your thoughts as the door swings open, a rather annoyed and stoic looking Grayson straightening up his suit. He walks over, sticking out his hand for a handshake.

“Grayson Hawthorne, pleased to meet you,” he introduces himself, not even cracking a smile. 

You introduce yourself as well, presenting a sweet smile to go along with your words. He just stares at you, unimpressed, almost looking bored. 

“Oh boy, he seems like a joy” you think to yourself, not letting the negativity of your thoughts slip into your kind and warm demeanor. 

As the two of you settle into the interview space, the atmosphere grows increasingly frosty and tense. Grayson was clearly not in the mood to answer any hard hitting questions today, answering with the most vague responses possible. This left you to navigate through a maze of one-worded answers and dismissive gestures. 

It soon became evident that this interview would be a test of your ability to crack the enigma that was Grayson Hawthorne. 

The minutes ticked by slowly, and you pressed on, determined to unravel the layers of the unyielding celebrity. Little did they know, this encounter would become a battle of wits, a dance between an interviewer seeking to break through his icy demeanor and a stubborn man determined to maintain his impenetrable facade. 

Despite the obvious tension in the room, you continue on with your hard hitting questions, determined to get something out of Grayson Hawthorne. The air hung heavy, each question met with unspoken challenges and calculated responses. Grayson wasn’t a lot in your eyes, but the bastard was good. 

In a subtle shift, you decide to take a less business approach to the questions and quite beating around the bush. 

“So,” You smile sneakily, leaning forward as you fold your hands in your lap. “The Heiress, Ms. Grambs. Any comments on her you would like the world to know, or are you gonna shut this topic down too?” You smirk to yourself as you see a slight glimmer in his eye from your boldness. Maybe it was just the set lights that hit his perfect face just right, but you knew damn well he had something to say from the way he brightened up ever so slightly.

“No comment.” He says coldly, shifting in his chair. He crossed one leg of the other in your direction, body language indicating his slight interest in your approach to the questioning. 

He didn’t trust you, but he was opening up. Ever so slightly.

You smile warmly, laughing softly to try and clear the atmosphere. “Well folks, there’s your answer.” You turn back towards Grayson, looking him straight in the eyes as if willing him to give you something, anything. “Not to sound too forward, but you are a very handsome and wealthy young man. You have stated in previous interviews that, and I quote, ‘dating is not your thing, never has been and won’t be for the foreseeable future if you can help it,” You smile sneakily once again. 

“Does that still apply, or has a special someone changed your perspective on that?”

Grayson goes slightly stiff at your words. You take note of this, deciding that this would be that last romance question in an attempt to get him to feel comfortable. 

“I stand by the previous statements made regarding that particular topic.” He says, unfazed and bored. 

You lean back in your seat, uncrossing you legs and sighing, “Mr. Hawthorne, you are one tough cookie to crack.” You laugh, smiling sweetly at him. “I assume privacy is one of the things you value most?”

“Yes, it is.” He nods, but gives no other indication of emotions.

Bingo. You’ve gotten him to talk. And you are running with it. 

You smile, locking eyes with him again, “And is there any particular situation that made that choice set in stone? Or has that just been something you’ve always lived by?” You watch his eyes flicker with something, but you aren’t sure what.

“I grew up watching what the media had done to family members and the little bit they showed the press and chose to just steer clear indefinitely. It is better to avoid a burning building and wonder what would have happened then to walk in and burn.” He folds his hands in his lap, re-cuffing the sleeves.

You smile from ear to ear, overjoyed that he had gotten out more than a few words. “I guess I never thought of it that way.”

“You never had to.” Grayson cuts in, expression cold. It was clear this was a sensitive topic, so you decide not to push any farther. 

“I suppose I never did, my sympathy to those who found out the hard way.” You nod. Then, as if nothing had happened, your bright smile is back.

“Alright, Mr. Hawthorne. I believe that is all the questions I have for today.” You shake his hand again, thanking him for coming out and saying goodbye to your audience. Grayson gets up immediately, looking as if he was fighting to leave the room. 

You choose to ignore it, speaking with the camera crew and production team as the wrap up.

---

Less than a half hour later you are walking back to your dressing room, a nagging feeling in your cut. You feel guilty, not sure for what, but the feeling is there non the less. 

“Fuck it,” You think to yourself, heading towards the guest dressing room.

You knock on the door. No response. 

“Hello?” You call out, only to be met with no response once again. You continue to knock for a few more minutes, ear pressed to the door for any indication of life on the other side of the door.

Eventually, a staff member finds you looking like a creep with your ear pressed to the door. She tells you that Grayson was on his way to his limo and he was quite grumpy. At this news your stomach drops, concerned that you had been the root of his unhappiness. 

You weren’t sure why that particular fact bothered you.

You intercept him outside on the way to his car, hand waving in the air to catch his attention. 

“Mr. Hawthorne!” You yell, causing him to turn. His eyes narrow, brows furrowing as he looks down at you.

“Hi,” You smile, slightly out of breath from chasing him down. “Can I speak with you for a quick second?”

Grayson glances back at his bodyguard, giving a silent signal in the form of a nod. He steps off to the side, nodding at you stiffly. 

“Quickly.” He spits out rather rudely.

“I wanted to apologize.” You say softly, eyes locked on his to show your genuine intention.

This catches Grayson off guard, “Apologize for what exactly?” He slightly quirks a brow, still peering down at you.

“For overstepping the boundaries of the interview. The description of the question I sent your agent had nothing to do with personal life or romance and it was inappropriate of me to ask such things of a total stranger.” You ramble, talking with your hands, the complete opposite from your shiny and perfect interviewer persona. 

Grayson just nods stiffly at you once again, offering no answer as you continue on.

“I’ll have the production team cut anything other than strictly business conversation or we can cut the interview entirely if you wish.”

“No need.” He says quietly. “Just cut the things not described in the papers sent to my agent and myself.”

You let out a sigh of relief, smiling at him “Thank you so much, Mr. Hawthorne”

“Grayson.” He cuts you off. “Just Grayson is ok. Mr. Hawthorne makes me sound old.” He says curtly, turning to leave.

You just stand there as he gets in the limo, waving stiffly at you. Your eyes follow the limo as it leaves, confused as to what had just happened.

The picks up, causing you to shiver slightly, wrapping your arms around yourself. The shutter of a camera catches your attention in the distance. A group of maybe 3 paparazzi were huddled behind a group of bushes, holding their cameras in your direction.

You offer a sweet and warm smile, waving at them as they flick a few more pictures before walking off. You simply shrug, heading back inside for the warmth of the building.

Weird. 

---

Later that evening, you were finishing up with the production team getting the right clips in the right order and making everything look amazing. 

“Ok, guys. Looks great!” You smile proudly, thanking your team for all their great work throughout the day. The sound of your name being called catches your attention, causing you to turn.

Your eyes land on your agent, peeking her head through the door and asking to speak with you outside. You nod, slightly confused, and follow her into the small hallway. 

She looks at you with an odd look, “How are we gonna clean this up?” She says.

“Clean up what?” You laugh nervously, “What happened?”

She quirks an eyebrow at you, telling you to check your phone. You furrow your brows in confusion, pulling out your phone.

The second you laid eyes on it the screen glows with an endless amount of notifications: texts, dm’s, emails, and missed phone calls. Out of curiosity you click on one of the emails, leading you to an article link.

Hawthorne Heir Apparent and Heart-throb Grayson Hawthorne Spotted with Well-Known Interviewer and Possible New Girlfriend, and the cover was a picture of you and Grayson speaking in the parking lot.

Your stomach drops, “Shit.”

[sgiandubh]

Good morning to you...as always, this person is very indignant and enraged.

https://www.tumblr.com/maximumwobblerbanditdonut/748583730081333248/the-unexpected-guests?source=share

Dear (returning) Mythomaniac Anon,

Sorry for the delay and see below why. Well, then: how was that, at their end of the rope, across the street?

I know, I am quoting BIF (that petty, nasty, condescending woman), their Main Intellectual Luminary (LOL for years), but see how easy it is to boomerang anything?

And I will even suit myself and quote her some more, lookie here:

I am not even sorry. Karma is a bitch, like that and it seems to have backfired badly on BIF's comadre, 'Max'. You see, I can immediately tell when people who have NO idea about what LAW really is, start talking about it. They will always be oh so damn literal and oh so damn mechanical in their 'reasonings'. I mean, if law were to be read as is, why would we even bother going to law school, right? Why not have AI sort it out, literally and mechanically, too (and boy does 'Max' sound like an android when she starts droning her maximum wobbling bullshit)? You see, in law, it's never enough to copy/paste something, because this is about people, money and interests, being those individual or collective. Timelines are important (and indispensable in any legal approach), but never enough: what makes the difference is always the particular context and the interpretation of facts - that is, by the way, called jurisprudence, when it becomes a legally binding precedent (not our modest case, here), in common law system countries (the UK, the US) or a complementary source of law, like in Roman/Civil law systems, such as the French and Romanian ones, which I know best. There is a technical distinction between those two concepts (legally binding precedent and complementary source of law) and I once passed a whole year written exam in Public French Law with honors, picking this exact topic, but I won't bother you with it, Anon. In a nutshell, tread carefully when you open that droning mouth and leave no stone unturned, if possible. Otherwise, you'd make a fool out of yourself, with bullshit like this:

There is no Midhope Distillery Company Ltd, you fool. There once was the Midhope Castle Distillery Ltd, as I have abundantly shown in not one, but two posts. It did not 'change its name' in 2023, it was dissolved by voluntary write-off (third time might be a charm, across the street, maybe the coin would drop?). And one more time, for you Mordor people in the back: there is no way to know who the shareholders of a given company are, based on the Company House records, nor the amount of their participation. This is confidential information, as shown also in the Planning Proposal - once more, I repost the screenshot:

' The Business Plan, submitted (...) under Private and Confidential cover, provides background information on the applicant'. Including, but not limited to, the existing investors/shareholders - it is essential to show the local authorities your business project is not a whim or a dream.

She also writes confidently stuff like:

That is simply not true. As I have also shown in my last post, Outlander is explicitly mentioned in both the first and the revised Planning Proposals, as a strong argument for the entire business project. It may serve to remember that one of the elements justifying it was to provide the 20k seasonal visitors of the Midhope Castle Grounds an opportunity to access the (vastly) improved interior of the castle, along with a whisky related experience/discovery activity, accommodation and high-end dining opportunity. Again, I repost the screenshot, because those people are mendacious by nature and it is perhaps the only way to show them some facts (not useless factoids):

That being said, we can speculate and deduct a simple correlation between a company actively looking for investors to support their now vastly revised, ten-year project and an actor-cum-entrepreneur who might be interested/already involved in that project. Unless he'd make a formal announcement himself, at some point in time, there is no way to confirm. 'Max' should perhaps learn to water down her confident tone, sometimes, especially when it is obvious she did not look at the documents herself, used only Google in the arrogant and foolish hope 'those tinhat shippers are stupid' and has 0 (zero) legal expertise.

This whole thing might be pending approval, but let's not forget the first Planning Statement was approved back in 2020 (which is a good starting point), that they have secured a business partnership with the owner of the land, Lord Hope (the 4th Marquess of Linlithgow) and that as far as I could read during those past two days, all the reports seem ok, at least up until this point in time. I see no reason why they wouldn't meet and talk about it: on which planet is that such a big deal and on which planet could that be construed as 'conflict of interest' (another one of 'Max's' arguments), given the organic link between OL and Midhope, since 2013?

I also have made a hasty mistake, in my previous post, when dealing with Ken Robertson's participation to the project. He continued to be involved, as my penned timeline shows, in both Hopetoun Estate Distillery Ltd and Hopetoun Estate Whiskies Ltd, as a Director, continuously from May 2017 until their dissolution, in December 2022. Again, it's all on the timeline - see what I just did, here? LOL for a century and a half.

And for Marple's 'Sorry' clip, I have the perfect reply. Especially the chorus, of course - ignore the rest, it's about some Seventies playboy, quite an Alternate Universe from hers:

I will stop now, Anon. With the MPC Gala just round the corner, all the eyes will be on that one. This drama will probably draw to a fizzled denouement, as they always do, in this fandom. But I will follow that business project and report from time to time. I bet the farm we'll have news, rather sooner than later.

[therealslimshakespeare]

IM SORRY DID U SAY YOURE WORKING ON A FIC ABOUT “COP BIG DADDY ELVIS”?!?- please tell us more because this sounds like the greatest thing ever 😭

I did, Mon ami, I did indeed…welcome to the demented 2009, sweaty and non famous cop AU that @eliseinmemphis and myself cooked up in our feral yearnings one night.

Edit: it’s here

Allow me to lay a bit of the setting for us all, and maybe even throw in a few lines from the draft below.

Life is insular when you’ve been born and raised in a trailer park. A little El Paso suburb was never a thriving metropolis, what with its gas stations and dollar stores on the way to nothingness in the desert, but the recession didn’t help none. Your dreams of buying a car that might actually make it above 120 mph and not guzzle your wages in gas is a far off dream when you learn from officer Presley that your entrepreneuring father has been incarnated for racketeering across in Juarez. It’s a shame, a damn shame but it hardly throws a wrench in your life, you were already used to making it however you could. When workin’ at the trucker’s club turns into something a lil more illegal and Elvis has his morning waffle ruined by Joe Esposito yacking about the powers of your pink tongue…he feels a little responsible for leaving you without a father figure. He’s got top notch swamp coolers in his trailer, plenty of food and tiger figurines out front -and he’s got an interest in fast things, just like you.

You could do worse than shack up with such a fella; not that he’s offerin’ but you can tell by the flicker in his eye and the smirk of his lips that he’s as susceptible as the next guy watching you on the pole. Except this sweet, world weary cynic just might screw your gooey insides up worse than any threat or ogle from another man.

Snippet:

“Well, well officer Presley, finally got persnickety about laws, have ya?” you observed to yourself with a grin as you watched the handsome man swagger towards you along the white line in your side mirror, tugging at his pants as he neared, trying to shimmy the article of clothing a little higher but is impeded by his belt, stopped by his sizable belly, his holster and buckle sitting under the bulge of it.

Your mouth watered. It had been a year or two since you saw him last. He was always built, intimidating to all the stupid rascals he keeps in line along the border, but now he had become outright fat and his khaki shirt pulled apart between each button. Yet when he came up to your window, that little boy grin was still gracing one of the most exquisite faces known to man, and his voice was tender and playful when he greeted you, just as you once recalled. You could see his sweaty hair, matted on his chest and belly between the gaps, his underarms had massive pit stains, doubly apparent thanks to the light color of his police uniform.

Your smile had something of the she-wolf in it as you greeted him, sniffing the air in hopes of catching a whiff as he leaned on your window frame, nearly crowding you from outside. “Hey Miss Sweet Cheeks,” he greets, “you know why ya been pulled over?”

“Haven't got a clue, officer.” You stated the truth and enjoyed the way his title rolled off your tongue in a bantering way. It was easy.

Officer, officer. Somebody important and authoritative. No sir, yes sir, Officer.

His left eyebrow quirked and you wondered what he looked like at twenty five, how devastating that expression would have been before his wound and his meds and the water retention. Whatever power it may have once held, it holds nothing to this slightly bemused, slightly cynical world weariness that shows in his every expression now, that had a twitch of an eyebrow making you feel a fool. “You’re goin’ seventy in a forty five, Miss.” his tone was patient even as his face suggested he’d like to tan your hide for being so reckless. “Reckless endangerment of others, and yourself,” he quoted sternly, “it ain’t no small matter and I don’t countenance it on my highway.”

Gosh, you just loved it when he laid claim to government property like highways and interstates. It helped you smile meekly at him and nod.

“Sorry officer, I got lax.” You purred, batting your eyes and you could see the heavy flap of their coal coated weight in your periphery. “I’ve seen you lettin’ me flyby on the interstate. I guess I thought…”

[formosusiniquis]

A Steddie / Buckingham comedy of errors of sorts. It goes like this.

Robin thinks Chrissy Cunningham might be her non platonic soulmate. She's smart, a little goofy, observant, seems like a great listener, and after what the rumor mill is saying was a pretty intense summer has really come into her own. It's a shame she went straight from dating Jason to Eddie Munson.

"She said she's working on herself," Steve claims, more in tune with the gossip than she is, "pretty hypocritical of you to say guys and girls can't be friends."

Which is pretty hypocritical of him when she knows he only cares cause he's already planning his wedding to Chrissy's new boyfriend; he needs Eddie to be single otherwise he's pining away for his perfect co-babysitter for nothing.

But it doesn't matter if they are dating or if they aren't or if Chrissy Cunningham with her perfect strawberry blonde ponytail is her soulmate, because her parents keep trying to set her up with some friend of a friend. She needs to do something quick before disaster strikes.

Melissa and Richard Buckley still know how to tie one on, when the occasion strikes. They're parents now, they've settled down some. Given in to the picket fence life, keep their yard mowed so Gayle Collins down the way stops glaring. They haven't done anything really crazy since that weekend they left Robin with Minerva and went to see what that whole Woodstock thing was about. Now they mostly just stick to getting as high as they can and stargazing on the weekends that Robin is off with Steve, a sweet boy kind of a square but the brownie recipe he gave them makes the best edibles.

Melissa can tell her daughter is lonely, she notices a lot of things about Robin that she won't tell them. Richard has noticed that their dealer Eddie has started bringing a friend along with him. Eddie is a sweet boy too, raised well respects his elders something they care about now that they've become them, he is also obviously and fantastically gay. Like all the parents in Hawkins, Richard and Melissa have heard how Wayne Munson has taken in that Cunningham girl after she came back from her trip out of state. Melissa remembers being a vaguely out of control youth and knows that a trip out of state is code for one of two things, and Chrissy doesn't look like she's ever been pregnant. Chrissy seems like a girl who might like their daughter.

Steve would die before he denies Robin just about anything. She is the platonic love of his life, they nearly died together, they've come out together. He's pretty sure as long as he has Robin and his kids he'd be content for the rest of his life, romance be damned.

A sentiment Robin seems to agree with since she wants him to fake being her boyfriend. Obviously, he says yes. Steve is a good boyfriend, he's always been a good boyfriend. He's attentive, great with parents, knows when to keep the pda to a minimum but also knows when to put on a show. He used to be pretty sure that Mr. and Mrs. Buckley liked him. So he's not really sure why they pulled him aside before movie night.

"Your parents hate me."

"There isn't a parent in Hawkins who hates you."

"You mom just asked me if I didn't think it might be better if I found someone more suited to me."

"What does that even mean?"

"It's basically mom code for I think your the worst person my daughter could have brought home. If I had the choice I'd kill you so why don't you do us both a favor and fuck off."

"I don't think that's right."

"Rob, I love you but conversational nuance isn't exactly your thing."

Eddie likes his job. Sure it's technically not honest work, but who knows maybe down the line they'll legalize it. He's getting in on the ground floor, an entrepreneur. Hawkins is surprisingly pro-weed and Eddie is just fine sticking to that after this summer. His favorite customers are the old folks. Like Miss Brenda at the library or the Buckleys. He always brings Chrissy along when he goes out these days, she feels weird staying in the trailer by herself and he likes having her nearby. She puts people at ease.

Except the Buckleys, who seem strangely obsessed with her. They ask her pointed questions about Dorothy, and surely they mean an actual Dorothy, surely the nice middle aged couple aren't trying to figure out if Chrissy is queer. Sure he got some vibes off of Buckley the younger, but that was before she started dating the love of his life. Now he's starting to think his whole gaydar has gone to shit.

Chrissy, a baby gay who has just broken free of the nastiest case of comp het Eddie has ever seen, answer honestly. She doesn't know a Dorothy, is that one of Robin's band friends? How is Robin, she is so sweet. Chrissy just wishes she had more time in the day so they could see each other more. She's dating Steve right, they make just the cutest couple, don't they think?

Eddie can tell Melissa doesn't. A surprise when even Wayne likes Steve Harrington, thinks he's the bees knees. Loaned him a screwdriver or some shit when the guy was over fixing something at the Mayfield place. She smiles though and agrees that Steve is quite sweet, in a tone that Eddie is far more used to hearing used when people are talking about him than about Steve Harrington. He blinks and the next thing he knows Chrissy is agreeing for them both that dinner on Friday sounds lovely; she'll bring a dessert.

Like she's ever baked in her life.

Chrissy Cunningham has had a rough couple of months, but she's settled now. Sure, she had a breakdown so bad in Eddie's trailer that she ended up having to get professional help; but she got that help and a new support system for herself. Really, the only way life could be much better is if she were dating Robin Buckley.

Eddie likes to tease her, calls her a baby gay like she's a wobbly legged deer still figuring things out. She's had eyes on Robin since the fifth grade, when she got her hair cut short to her shoulders the first time and her teeth still had a gap before her braces went on. Steve is a great guy, she's seen him with the group of freshmen that follow him around like ducklings; she's also watching him now and he's spent most of dinner making moon eyes at Eddie instead of his girlfriend.

She doesn't understand how, Robin is a vision. Full of spit and vinegar, she is firecracker mad glaring at her parents across the table. "You really brought him here? I'm dating Steve, can you not accept that?"

A lot happens at once, Chrissy isn't entirely sure what is going on but it feels a lot like a pot boiling over, something left too long unattended.

"We aren't trying to set you up with our dealer," Mr. Buckley said. "You're not exactly his type."

"Chrissy is such a nice girl." Mrs. Buckley tries.

"You said you stopped that," Steve to Eddie, a lethal pout on his lips and downturned eyes.

"Well, I stopped with the kids," Eddie tries, "I gotta pay the bills somehow, sweetheart."

"Chrissy?" If Robin was a vision in her sharp eyed rage, she's radiant in her pink cheeked surprise.

Once the shock, surprise, and comedy wear off Chrissy thinks there will be tears. Robin's parents seem nice. They seem like the kind of parents you confide in and who hold you tight. She thinks about her mom doing something thoughtful, thinks of her quietly accepting who she is and who she loves; and when she can't do that she thinks of Wayne and Eddie and knows she'd cry once they were alone and the theater of it all was over. So she thinks she might need to make the most of her moment while it's there. "I don't want to be a homewrecker," she jokes, something she's picked up from Eddie, "but I think your boyfriend has his eyes other places."

"Boyfriend, what boyfriend?"

"They're showing Clue at The Hawk this weekend, if you want to go with me?"

Robin can't nod her head fast enough.

"Stevie, I noticed you find yourself newly single," Eddie says, sorrow so fake he should rethink his decision to go within 10 feet of the drama department. "If you could bear it, would you want to crash their date make it a double?"

Steve agrees so fast a bit of hair escapes his coif, it falls in a curl at his forehead.

Robin's parents both seem pleased, pleasant smiles that chrissy is becoming more accustomed to seeing on adults now that she resides in the Munson place. "They'll be smug about this forever," Robin confides. Her smile betrays her lack of real dismay.

Chrissy got her girl and her best friend got his boy, so she thinks it's all's well that ends well.

[melanieph321]

Dusan Vlahovic x Reader - Boss Me Around Part 1/6

I'm so excited for this one!🤭

Reader is a former yacht girl now newly moved to Turin, Italy for her job as a real-estate accountant. There she meets Dusan Vlahovic, a former client of hers, a client she never thought to see again. However, with Dusan being Readers new boss their past becomes a liability. Nevertheless the spark between them still lives. This story is a romcom with both His and Her POV!

Enjoy!

Miami did get a little crazy in the summer, thankfully it was your last year being a yacht girl. Yupp, you were keeping your promise. Once you were out of college you were putting your flip flops on a shelf and stuffing your bikini in the back of your pantie drawer. It was time to grow up and stop treating life like a circus. It was time to get a real job.

"But you'll still visit me when you move to Italy, won't you?" Izzy said, as the two of you shared a scooter on your way to the marina.

"Are you kidding? With my new salary I'm flying you out to visit me. We'll have so much fun together in Turin."

Although it was considered a job, you had formed many great friendships through yachting. Izzy was your best friend in the game, the one you never road without. If it hadn't been for Izzy teaching you the ways of the yachting game, you might as well have ended up in some really bad situations that a lot a girls do whilst seeking the fast way to earn some cash. It was important not to get too in awe of the experience. Izzy had tought you that. Izzy had also taught you that the biggest mistake girls in yachting did was fall in love with a client, a mistake you were thankful you had avoided throughout your career. Although college boys never realky gained your interest either.

"So who's this guy anyway?" You asked. "A nepo baby looking to party?"

"More like a self made billionaire. Raul says he owns like half of Serbia when it comes to real-estate."

"Impressive." You nodded. Your last job as as a yacht girl would be a breezer. It was easier to deal with rich entrepreneurs than spoiled nepo babies who believed to rule the world.

Or so you thought.

********************************************

"I think they're here." Alex said, looking over the boat deck, keeping an eye out for the girls. Once he spotted them Dusan rose from his taning bed, on his way to alert the crew to prepare the boat for departure.

"There's only two of them." Alex said, looking displeased as he returned from the deck, approaching his friend.

"Yes, one for you and one for me." Dusan said, pointing between the two of them.

"Man, you really have gone soft." Alex sighed. He was already suprised to be invited for a fun day out on his friend's new yacht, only to find the vessel empty of people if you excluded the crew members. "What happened to the old Dusan?" He said. "The one that likes to party. The one that taught me that the more the merrier, huh?"

Dusan chuckled. "I guess he's retired."

"At twenty four? How sad."

"Look, we can still have a good time. The girls said that they were up for anything."

"Yeah, but if I know you you're probably gonna ask them to watch you take a nap."

Dusan shook his head, a smile in his lips.

"When did you get so boring man, is that what a billion dollar empire does to you?"

Dusan opened his mouth to get back at his friend but that's when they heard voices below.

"Hello, anybody home?"

"Up hear!" Dusan shouted, a minute passing before they heard footsteps climbing the stairs. Two girls emerged, dressed in nothing but strips of fabric,  bikini's barley covering enough.

"Hi, I heard you guys were looking to party." The blond one said. Her hair was cut short with several tattoos covering her arms.

"Yeah, that's us." Alex grinned.

"Well, the party has arrived." She cheered.

Dusan had nothing against girls with short and bleached hair, but tattoos never did it for him.

"Great. How would you girls like your martinis?"

"Dry." The blond girl was quick to make clear. "And no olives."

"Got it, dry and no olives. How about your friend?"

All eyes turned to the second girl who's presence hadn't been as notisble as her friend. But now that he had his eyes in her, Dusan found it almost impossible to diverge his attention from her.

"Y/N?"

"Huh?" The girl seemed distracted,  her gaze having stuck to a point below Dusan's chin. He wasn't wearing a shirt,  only swimming trunks. Perhaps she found it rude, him introducing himself half naked. Not that she was any better.

"What drink do you want?" Her friend asked, in a bit if a rush to get the party started. The crew was heard above their heads,  the yacht would set sail at any minute now.

"S...ame as you." The girl stuttered. Her voice was unique. It was quite deep but in a very feminine way.

"No olives?" Her friend confirmed.

"No olives." The girl nodded. Her friend then followed Alex downstairs to the bar, leaving Dusan with no trail of thought in the presence of the girl which his eyes had yet diverge from.

"You have a very nice boat." She said,  trying to somther the rise of an awkward silence.

"Um, thank you." Dusan said, clearing his throat. "It's new actually."

"I can see that." She seemed fairly fascinated, as she dared approach the boats railing, admiring the view of Miami Beach.

"Yeah, how so?" Dusan asked, joining her side. But instead of admiring the view, he couldn't help but to admire her. She had eyes that sparked something within him, a sudden thrill.

"What do you mean?" A frown ruined her face.

Dusan felt the need to make himself clear. "You said that you could tell that my yacht is brand new,  how so?"

"Oh." She turned for her back to rest against the railing, her eyes now wandering across the newly swiped deck. "Well, it's every billionaires dream to own a boat and put it on display in Miami, or am I wrong?"

"I don't know." Dusan smiled. He was quite entertained. "I've never heard of this fenomenon. Surley the expert is you considering your experience with billionaires and boats."

The girl's eyebrow rose with interest, however Dusan's slik comment did not seem to have insulted her.

"Perhaps it's not every billionaires dream." She said, turning her head to face him. Again, her eyes sparked a thrill within Dusan, a thrill he was more than excited to explore. "But it sure is every newly crowned billionaires dream."

He wrinkled his nose.

The girl had a twinkle in her eyes. "My friend googled your net worth on our way here."

"I see." Dusan nodded. "Fair enough. I may or might not have bought this yacht in honor of my business flourishing this past year. However I'm not planning on docking it in Miami for display."

"Your gonna sail it across the seven seas?"

Dusan snorted, unintentionally of course. How did she make him do that? Her comment caught him of gaurd. "Not really." He said, collecting himself. "I'll have a friend of mine bring it home for me. He's more of a professional."

"Yeah, that's probably a better idea. Sailing a boat through pirate infested waters can be tricky without experience."

Again, the girl made him chuckled. It was pathetic how tipsy he came across. The girl must smell the glass of champagne he had earlier on his breath and think he's one of those creeps to invite yacht girls on their boats just to get them drunk. He had to assure her that he wasn't like that. He had to assure her that she could feel safe with him.

"We got martinis!"

Just as he was about to ensure her safety, the girl's friend showed up, followed by Alex who carried a tray of filled glasses. "Let's get this party started!" He said, handing out the drinks, making sure everyone had a glass in their hand for a toast. "To a lovely day, spent with two lovely girls." He said, as cheesy as ever.

"Cheers to that!" The blond girl said, rasing her glass.

Before downing his drink Dusan turned to her friend, making sure that she looked to be having a good time as well. He was suprised to find her smiling at him, an empty martini glass in her hand. "Drink up." She winked.

Dusan did exactly that. He would do whatever she asked him to, whatever.

[barbsgirlfriend]

Velvet & Veneer Headcanons Pt. 3

(If you notice inconsistencies between posts it is because I use google translate. My first language isn’t English, it is Swedish. And I also changed some stuff)

Velvet✨✨

Basics

Full name

Velvet Lyric Mazzola

Alias

Vel (pretty much everyone), sis (Veneer)

Age & DOB

19 31/7/05

Gender & Pronouns

Cis Female She/her

Sexuality

Lesbian

Occupation

Singer & Performer

Religion

Agnostic

Appearance

Weight

68.95 kg (152 lbs)

Height

192 cm (6’3)

Body Shape

Rectangle

Body Type

Mesomorph

Skin Color

White

Face Shape

Circle

Hair

Long, wavy, healthy, bright green

Eyes

Round shaped, bright blue

Normal Apparel

Extravagant clothing, skirts, jean shorts, crop tops, makeup

Distinguishing features

Beauty mark above lip, scar on her left arm from childhood, dimples, five tattoos, and a big ahh forehead

Personality

Personality Type

ESTP-A (the entrepreneur)

Short Description

Velvet is extremely goal-orientated, and would put her friends or family down to reach her own goals. She strives for attention and love. Velvet might seem mean on the outside, but deep down she has a soft spot for her twin brother, Veneer. She’s extremely protective of her loved ones, but she isn’t the most reliable. Velvet barks more than she bites, but she can knock a bitch down.

Traits

Mean, ambitious, artistic, humorous, intelligent, controlling, protective, talented, somewhat toxic, and strong

Likes

Bubble baths, perfume, money, shopping, expensive clothes, praise, candles, mani pedis, the beach, purple crop tops, and roses

Dislikes

Trolls, being ignored, cheap perfumes, the feel of velvet fabrics 💀, her parents, being bossed around, balloons

Hobbies

Singing, dancing, songwriting, yoga, sketching makeup ideas, collecting vintage magazines, hairstyling, and zip lining

Fears

Thantophobia, atychiphobia, athazagoraphobia, cynophobia

Backstory

On July 31st, 2005, Velvet was born along with her younger twin brother. Her parents only wanted a boy, so she never got a lot of attention. She was cared for on and off by her parents and grandparents. Velvet made a strong connection with her grandmother, January, who was a famous singer in her days. Her grandmother was the main reason she wanted to start singing.

At the age of six, she was enrolled to a private primary school with her brother. Velvet became instantly popular for her famous grandmother and dentist parents. She became friends with almost everybody and loved her younger years. In year 3, her grandmother passed away. It was difficult on Velvet as she lost her main caretaker and friend.

At the start of secondary school, Velvet started becoming rebellious. She and Veneer would sneak out of the house to go to parties, smoke, etc. Eventually, the two were caught. As a punishment, they were given too many activities to worry about instead of sneaking off. She really started to despise her parents.

Velvet would skip her extracurriculars and use her free time to hangout with her friends or sleep. In year 12, she started dating. Velvet was dating the goalie for the school’s football team. However, he was a cunt. He was toxic and emotionally abusive towards Velvet.

This relationship was very draining for her. It made Velvet’s mental health really decline. One day, she got into a heated argument, and he hit her. Velvet went to protect herself, but Veneer jumped in and beat the fuck out of him. Safe to say, he never messed with her again.

Around that time, she started her singing career. Velvet would post her songs on SoundCloud, and got a few thousand followers! She felt consumed by the fame and wanted MORE. Velvet convinced her twin brother to start singing with her a bit after. They became insanely famous stupidly fast.

Velvet was blinded by her fame and money, making her toxic and controlling. It was so bad that she had to go to weekly therapy to control herself. She moved out of her parents house and into a beach home for her and Veneer.

She lives with Veneer right outside of Mount Rageous. she’s pretty happy now. She loves her life and how far she’s come.

Favorites & Least Favorites

Food

F: East Coast oysters. LF: scrambled eggs

Drink

F: raspberry lemonade. LF: Pepsi

Song

F: Agora Hills (Doja Cat). LF: 9 to 5 (Dolly Parton) she’s sick and tired of crimp singing it

Season

F: Summer. LF: winter

Place

F: her grandmother’s music hall. LF: childhood room

Color

F: purple. LF: red

Relationships

Mother: Veronica Mazzola/56/living

Father: Valentino Mazzola Jr./58/living

Brother: Veneer Mazzola/19/living

Other: Grandma/Mom’s Side/January Harmony/85/deceased, Grandpa/Dad’s Side/Valentino Mazzola Sr./92/deceased

Lover(s): Joey/20/living/ex, Orchid/18/living

Other

Birthplace: Mount Rageous

Residence: 5 miles out of Mount Rageous in a Beach House

Nationality: Mount Rageon

Ethnicity: Mount Rageon

Veneer

General

Full Name

Veneer Adagio Mazzola

Alias

Ven (almost everyone), bro (Velvet)

Age & DOB

19 31/7/05

Gender & Pronouns

Cis male He/him

Sexuality

Bisexual with pref for men

Occupation

Singer & Performer

Religion

Christian

Appearance

Weight

67.13 kg (148 lbs)

Height

183 cm (6’0)

Body Shape

Rectangle

Body type

Ectomorph

Skin Color

White

Face shape

Circle

Hair

Medium, wavy, soft, bright green

Eyes

Round and bright blue

Normal Apparel

Extravagant clothing, heels, jeans, t-shirts, tank tops, bracelets, earrings

Distinguishing features

Scar on upper lip, tooth gap, and three tattoos

Personality

Personality type

ESFJ-A (the consul)

Short Description

Veneer is extremely smart… like VERY smart. He’s insane with how good his intuition is and how quick he can find your biggest insecurities. Veneer is goal-orientated like his older twin sister, but he’s more secretive about it. To most, he only seems to be a flamboyant himbo. But in reality, Veneer is a caring but shady bitch.

Traits

Loud, judgy, overall friendly, happy-go-lucky, flamboyant, sensitive, protective, strong, talented, intelligent, mean

Likes

Pop music, gossip, anything gucci, the champagne toast scent from BaBW, beanies, vintage clothing, expensive jewelry, smell of gasoline

Dislikes

Cheap food, being bossed around, cigarettes, Velvet spraying perfume on him, being tickled, being alone, lavender scent, having no money

Hobbies

Dancing, singing, gardening, shopping, sketching fashion ideas, crocheting, acting, playing tennis, fishing

Fears

Atychiphobia, acrophobia, traumatophobia

Backstory

On July 31st, 2005, Veneer was born along with his older twin sister. Their parents only wanted a boy, so Veneer got the most attention growing up. He was spoiled to death by his parents, but it made him uncomfortable. Ever since he was a toddler, he was weirded out by his parents. However, there was an important figure in his life that made him not uncomfy: Valentino Mazzola Sr.

His grandfather supported his love of dance and acting, but also taught him “manly” things. Veneer was very close to his grandfather. He started attending a private primary school with his twin sister. Quickly, he became popular; not just by his family being famous. Veneer was an extremely nice kid in Primary School.

In middle school, Veneer started to experiment with who he was. He started painting his nails, got his ears pierced, and acted more feminine. But this angered his parents; they said that they didn’t want a gay child. With that, he started becoming very secretive. Veneer didn’t talk to certain people for months on end.

When he got to year 10, his grandfather past away. It was really hard on Veneer. On top of all the stressful activities he had to do; he had to suffer loss. This was when Velvet and Veneer started their singing career. (Ha that rhymed).

He felt so happy that people adored him; he felt even happier his sister was getting the attention she deserved. Due to getting famous, Veneer really stopped caring. He became himself and didn’t give two shits if his parents started complaining.

Veneer became an icon in Mount Rageous quickly. He is just as greedy with his fame as Velvet, but he can control himself more. He loves his life, his family, his boho chic home decorations, and his money.

Favorites & Least Favorites

Food

F: Lobster tail LF: coconut

Drink

F: Pipeline Punch Monster LF: sparkling water

Song

F: I’m Not a Girl, Not Yet a Woman (Britney Spears) LF: Rude Boy (Rihanna)

Season

F: Fall LF: Winter

Place

F: the beach LF: elevators

Color

F: hot pink LF: bright yellow

Relationships

Mother: Veronica Mazzola/56/living

Father: Valentino Mazzola Jr./58/living

Sister: Velvet Mazzola/19/living

Other: grandma/Mom’s side/January Harmony/85/deceased, Grandpa/dad’s side/Valentino Mazzola Sr./92/deceased

Lover(s): Kid Ritz/19/living

Other

Birthplace: Mount Rageous

Residence: 5 miles out of Mount Rageous

Nationality: Mount Rageon

Ethnicity: Mount Rageon

(Thank you for reading this massive thing <3 )

[boringkate]

I watched Lena Dunham's Sharp Stick (2022) with a babe last month. Which I absolutely loved!!!

It's never explicitly acknowledged, but the main character is clearly supposed to be (despite the producers claiming otherwise) in some way neurodivergent. Or something. She's meek and impossibly sexually naive (to the point where me and the girl I watched it with had initially assumed the character was intended to be a child). Apparently they had approached an autism sexuality advocate to work as a consultant for the film before backpeddling.

Trans girls tend to be autistic.

The main character also had a hysterectomy (as did Lena Dunham).

Trans girls tend to be infertile.

She's shown taking estrogen.

Trans girls tend to take estrogen.

She becomes obsessed with porn and begins having one night stands with random men from the internet in hopes of finding validation by proving her sexual desirability.

Trans girls tend to do that shit.

It ends with her realizing and leaning into her impregnation fetish (while getting fucked by the one black guy she knows who had just brought over some 40s and called them homies and also while her black step sister's hands unexpectedly drift in from off screen to hold her because even when she managed to push it off to the last second Lena Dunham is incapable of being chill and normal about race).

Trans girls can't go ten seconds without making the same joke about how if you don't think you can get a trans girl pregnant then you just aren't trying hard enough (and the frequent fetishization of black men in trans and especially neighboring sissy communities can't really be denied).

Also the bartender is played by Tommy Dorfman (a trans woman) with it being her first time playing a character with a girl name.

But I'm not trying to suggest it's intentionally a movie about the tgirl excperience. That would be silly. Really the takeaway should be that (no matter how varied women's lives may be) we (trans women and cis women etc) can still always find common ground and shared excperiences. We're all in this together.

But anyways I was looking at Lena Dunham's Instagram yesterday (I've been off and on again rewatching Girls, so she's stayed on my mind).

One post features the music video she directed starring famed trans girl Hari Nef.

Another post shows that she recently read trans boy Elliot Paige's memoir Paige Boy.

Another post shows a conversation she had with Jon Bernthal (on his podcast) where she explains the word cis to him and talks about having also explained it to her husband (this is the only clip from her appearance on the podcast that she chose to post).

BTW did you know that she was an executive producer for the 2021 show Genera+ion (which I recall featuring a trans boy actor playing a cis boy character who gets a girl pregnant).

Fascinating!

Meanwhile. Ten years earlier. In 2013 (a year into my transition and a year before Time declared that we've reached the trans tipping point) an episode of Girls features a doorman telling one of the titular Girls that "a tranny walked in last time and he was just walking around the floors, but it was nothing." (lmao)

UPDATE: s05e02 features a "did you just assume my pronouns" bit. (in a way that felt reactionary and gross because the theyfab saying it was an absurd hipster barista that the audience isn't intended to sympathize with)

UPDATE UPDATE: s06e02 features the leader of a group for women entrepreneurs saying "For those of you asking on our Facebook if the group is open to trans women: The answer is: We don't know. Okay?" (which I thought was fun)

UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE: s06e03 (the literal next episode) "I even went to a couple of hookers and one of them had a dick."

[roodllle]

Baldur's Gate 3 Act 3 spoilers under the cut

I have not seen anyone talk about these notes you find about Gortash so I'm going to post them!

So if you go to the Flymm store you'll meet Enver's parents and you can learn by using the tadpole that they sold him to a warlock. But it seems that as he got older he went into the smuggling business and was already showing how controlling he will become. Looks like someone tried to warn other smugglers, but clearly that failed horribly.

You find this note under Franc Peartree's house and I'm going to read way too deeply in this note lol

"Weapon distribution continues like a parent saving their drowning child: swimmingly"

Ugh ok when I read this I thought 'does he just think constantly about how his parents threw him to the wolves. is it a subconscious thing??' I wouldn't be surprised if he was the type to think that he wound up better off without his parents and that he may have actually choose this life anyway. But in the back of his head he may also wonder what life would've been like if he had loving parents ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ who knows

Then one of my fav lines:

"You are a treasure, and I should like to hold you in my arms and whisk you about! How you would laugh, Franc! Of course, people would say we're in love. And I do. I do love you, Franc. I love any man willing to birth a little more slithering, wet malice into the world. By sending out my weapons, putting them in groping, willing fingers, you've done just that."

Ok there are 3 things that came to my mind.

1. Queer Gortash? Is he being facetious?

2. Maybe Gortash is being chummy and him and Franc have known each other for awhile?

3. This is what really made me think though was that Gortash for all his tyranny has never been the type to revel in malice. Like ye he knows he's a tyrant but he wants slaves, he doesn't want more bloodshed in the streets nor does he usually talk so......poetically.

You know who does though? Orin. Especially since Franc ends up being a part of one of her assassinations. Get the guy to make more weapons then silence him?

Maybe? Maybe I've pegged Enver all wrong but who knows. I'm probably going to go back to Franc's house to see if my hypothesis is right.

And this last note I have has been my absolute fav that you can find when freeing Florrick. It's in one of the jail cells with a skeleton.

It was a very nice to initially refer to Enver as, Enver Flymm.

I don't know who Vance Farnol is but he seemed to know a crap ton about Gortash.

Farnol doesn't seem to know that at one point Enver was sold into warlock/demon slavery so maybe his POV is that he saw Enver as an urchin boy with his shitty parents.

Doesn't see him for awhile. Then sees him as a smuggler in the streets.

Enver joins a gang and that's when he changes his last name. Was it recommend as being a new member of the gang? Did people automatically think of the shoe shop when hearing Flymm? Was it more for Enver to distance himself from them?

He eventually becomes the Kingpin and seems to call himself an independent entrepreneur

Rivals? All my rivals are dead. I have not gotten to Gortash's boss fight yet but no one has to tell me this man can't actually fight. Is he probably good with a dagger and a fist fight? Possibly, but it's more likely he's good at weaseling out of situations and getting other people to do the dirty work.

Zhent's Days is Past, I missed that part in Act 1 where there's a sidequest to help those guys? So maybe I missed something in their hideout which would give their POV to this situation.

Then it seems he strikes a contract/deal with the god Bane and then strikes an Oath with Orin

"Not Even Everything is Enough" Someone never told Gortash that acquiring the world is never going to fill that empty black hole of a heart he has

And then we have him working with Kethric, getting the Gondians to serve him and then his most hammy line

Call me LORD Gortash

I love how there's so much depth to this character, makes me sad there aren't actually a lot more scenes with him. I know romancing him would be almost impossible but just having more scenes would be wonderful.

Anyways thanks for reading and share your thoughts!!

[twofortea]

HELLO FELLOW KKSK SHIPPER 🎉 hope you don’t mind me sprinkling some recs your way (saw the ask you got about underrated fics and oh boy do I have some)

One of my all time favorites is Ninja Dorks Flailing at Interpersonal Relations by lulu42!! It’s so 🥰

Another good one is To Give is to Receive by yunyu (who doesn’t love fics with Sukea 📸)

This one is incomplete and idk if the authors still around but Reflection by Tsumeinuzuka is a fairly good mulan au 🤌🏻

Yes, Chef by mummapaintstheblues is 🔥🔥🥵

I have so many more but I’ll end it here for now to not clog up your ask!!

YAAAS these are all great! I will link for ease of reading :)))

Ninja Dorks Flailing at Intrapersonal Relations by lulu42

Yamato-sensei was crazy. There was no way she was going on a date with the Rokudaime. A heartwarming tale of poor social skills, cuddles, and denial.

To Give Is To Receive by yunyu

A flash went off. Sakura blinked as Sukea said cheerfully, “Oh, that will be a great picture. You really are a beautiful couple.” He propped up his elbow on the bar and rested his head on it with a contented sigh. “Ah, Sukea, isn’t it? Here to try to get my mask off again?” said Kakashi. “Well I was thinking of getting a few things off, starting with your wife’s clothes, but now that you’re here…” Sakura widened her eyes at the audacity of his joke, especially since he was pausing so long without laughing it off with something like I guess that plan is out. “…I wouldn’t mind getting yours off as well.”   --- Written for the "salty" prompt for KakaSaku Week 2016.

Reflection by Tsumeinuzuka

How could she sit by and watch as her village throws their most vulnerable into a war they had nothing to do with? Mulan AU.

Yes, Chef by mummapaintstheblues

Entrepreneur and chef, Kakashi Hatake, finds fortune overnight. Pursues his dream of building his own restaurant, and in turn, becomes a success that people flock to from all over. The only regrets in his new life being the endless stream of food bloggers who dog him, and that he'd never been able to bed his former hostess, Sakura Haruno. When she turns up out of the blue, Kakashi has to be sure what she wants. And he's more than willing to give it to her.

[jqmalikhsgib]

stars

two

yn had been here so many times, it hurt less and less each time. she knew once she shared a little bit about her life people would pry more and more. this had been different though.

yn has been ready to tell the world about her amazing boyfriend and their adorable kid, but she wanted to do it at her own pace, in her own time.

slowly giving the world hints on who the man of the hour had been is amazing. millions of people speculating who it could be, she’d admit, it’s fun watching them squirm. she even replied to some fans that asked about him.

she loves sharing a little piece of herself. what she didn’t like was the obsessive prying eyes of the media. they found the location of aarons work, camping outside the building in case she had come out holding hands with the infamous mystery man. unfortunately they got nothing from her.

she hated that they’ve stalk her and they could potentially stalk aaron. aaron kept reassuring her that he’d be okay. he was sorta use to the cameras and a bit of the spotlight—dave is a famous author after all—paparazzi camped out the building long before they even met. yn just didn’t want him to get hurt by these vultures. aaron just laughs at her antics because, well, he’s an fbi agent. nothing a few paparazzi could do to him is anything like he’s had done while being on the field.

she realized how silly it is to fear for his safety. she just didn’t want this to ruin their relationship. it’s one of the many reasons why she stays in virginia and not in california or new york city. it’s quite quaint and simple.

the next few weeks had been pretty busy for yn. she’s been working on her own cosmetic line and another studio album. she’s excited for her new brand and possibly her last album for a little while.

yn is ready to slow down a little! her and aaron’s relationship is going amazing and she wants to eventually get married and have more kids. technically speaking, they’re already engaged! aaron proposed to her last year. she said yes immediately, but she didn’t want to officially get married until she was ready to take a break from music and do one last world tour for a little while. she also didn’t wanna tell anyone he had proposed just yet. not wanting people to know until they’re officially ready to plan the wedding.

aaron’s beyond proud of his girl. she’s finally doing something she’s wanted for awhile besides music! yn had been talking about becoming more of an entrepreneur for about two years now but had been afraid she’d failed. aaron assured her that she’d be very successful simply because she is smart and talented. her fans will love anything and everything she puts out there.

“darling, come to bed.” aaron whispers in her ear as he wraps his arms around her waist. she’s doing some last minute touches on a few designs she had in mind. not knowing how she wanted the logo for her cosmetic line to look.

“in a minute, babe. just gotta figure this out.” yn concentrate on a few photos. aaron sighs. he spins her around, gently grabs the papers, and sets them down. aaron caresses her cheek and kisses her gently. “hey, they’ll be there in the morning. you’ve barely got a lick of sleep the last few days. im worried about you.” aaron frowns. he rest his chin on top of her head. she sighs as she wraps her arms around his waist

“im sorry, baby. just want everything to be perfect.”

“and they will, yeah? because you’re a genius! but you don’t need to overwork or stress yourself. what is it you always tell me, huh?”

yn smiles. “work will be there tomorrow, family may not.”

“exactly! our son misses his mammas cuddles.”

yn felt awful.

“hey, i know what you’re thinking. none of that, you hear!” aaron leafs no room for arguments

she hums. “where’s my boy?”

“upstairs in his bed. he’s waiting for us to read him his favorite bedtime story. says he wants you to do it because you do the voices better.” aaron playfully scoffs.

“of course i do! mister monotone.”

“im not monotoned.” aaron argues. yn just shakes her head as she heads upstairs to their sons room. aaron follows right behind.

“ready, baby?” yn asked as she gently walks into jacks room.

“yeah, mamma!”

[edutainer2022]

It's Scott Tracy's birthday, but all my WIP stories are kinda angsty atm. So I decided to revisit this little thing on the day - it always makes me smile. It's mind-numbing fluff. A morning talk-show with Jeff Tracy upon return to Earth provides grounds for some much needed revelations. And hugs.

ONE WORD ANSWERS

As interviews were going these months, this was a smaller one. Done privately from the desk in the lounge via a holo-com. Ever since the dramatic return from Oort Cloud, already christened the "Rescue of the Century", every media outlet worldwide wanted a piece of him. Jeff didn't feel much like putting up with most of it - eight years in outer space on meager rations and slim hope was a brutal awakening once they were safely back on Earth. Besides, he'd rather not waste any more time than necessary on media coverage, away from his family. He'd done his fair share of that in his active duty days, and Lord knew he had A LOT to catch up with in his sons' lives. A lot! Some things he gleaned and pieced together in observations and a backlog of reports were more... thought provoking than others. But some visibility was needed and even expected. He understood that.

The interview for a morning show in a different timezone was to be short, capped up with a ten-questions blitz to lighten the mood. The outline of questions, as per usual, was screened by John and Tracy Legal, and pre-approved by Jeff himself. His only recommendation this time around was the order of points in a blitz.

If the boys were surprised he asked them to sit in through the interview, obscured by the sunken lounge, they didn't show it. Jeff made sure everyone was on the island, Scott back from NYC and the Tracy Industries Board full of questions and incessant worries as to the perspective changes in status quo, Alan back from campus orientation, even John planetside for the weekend (something that had become a frequent and welcome habit). They knew Dad sometimes struggled with social situations these days and needed some cheering along and support - which was provided with unreserved abandon.

The interview was running its course smoothly, as they neared the 10 questions section. The show anchor was all smiles - the mock-blitz questions were submitted by the viewers and the most frequent or special ones were selected.

- So, Mr. Tracy, you were the First Man on Mars, the Founder of International Rescue, you set multiple supersonic speed records. How would you describe yourself in one word?

Oh, that was an easy one. He would have used so many words years ago as applied to himself - some more on point, some vain. A pilot. An astronaut. An entrepreneur. A husband. A son. A Thunderbird. A man of the world. A friend. A savior. A failure. An idealist. A leader. A survivor. Jeff Tracy still was all those things, in different measures. But eight years of the endless night, with nothing but his thoughts, memories and dreams for company, have distilled his self-awareness to one point of absolute clarity:

- A father.

He could hear the collective breath escape his sons' lips and a soft glow washed over their features.

The blitz went on.

- What are you most proud of?

That too was a no-brainer, but he might need more than one word to answer exhaustively. Never hurts to elaborate on global television:

- My sons. There are no words to express how proud I am of their accomplishments and of the incredible people they grew up to be: my youngest son Alan is a prodigy, the youngest rocket pilot in history, Gordon is an Olympic champion, an environmental activist AND an Aquanot for International Rescue, Dr. John Tracy, the Voice that Answers, holds multiple PhD degrees in Astrophysics and Computer Science, my son Virgil is an accomplished pianist, like his mother, and a recognized artist on top of being busy full time with International Rescue engineering.

Smiles were blooming on his boys' faces up to a point it became apparent he stopped his answer at four. Jeff could swear there was a sheen of tears in Alan’s eyes, whereas light brown and turquoise turned momentarily hard. Virgil's whole face was a shimmer of disbelief and betrayal. Scott's eyes, soft and understanding, and infinitely sad, would be enough to stop the interview right there and backtrack. But he needed to see this through just right. The news anchor was beaming, as they were down to the last question:

- That is certainly a LOT to be proud of, Mr. Tracy. I'm sure the whole world, anyone who has ever needed help from International Rescue, would agree. But our viewers want to know one last thing from the Hero of the Century. Do you know you're called that? That's a tough mark to measure up to! Well, who is YOUR Hero, Mr. Tracy?

The anchor probably would have never guessed how simple and ready that answer was in his mind. He didn't need a moment to think:

- My eldest son. Scott Tracy. Everything International Rescue is today, everything our family is today - we owe him. I owe him my life. I know nobody stronger in the face of so much pain and pressure. I could survive in outer space, but I am not sure I could ever do what he did in my absence. I could never admire or respect anyone more. I am a better man for being his father. So it's simple as that, Scott Tracy is my hero.

The holo projector barely flickered out when he was barreled into midriff by a flurry of warm and blond, and fierce. Alan hugged him tight and mumbled "Thank you!", no doubt aimed at his words not only on all other brothers, but on Scott. He meant every one of those. Soon he was in a circle of strong arms and within reach of the most beloved young faces, incandescent with emotions and hope. All but one. Scott lingered behind, as he was disturbingly wont to since their first hug in the Oort Cloud - hence Jeff's little staged performance today, as a desperate measure. He held his eldest son's gaze unwaveringly across the lounge, aware of the tears streaming from still astonished blue eyes. It was an instant loss to step out of his boys' embrace even for a brief moment, but there was something he needed to do. He crossed to the couches in three big strides and held Scott as tightly to himself as the still recuperating muscles would allow. It hurt to know the boy would be this surprised to be acknowledged and appreciated. But Jeff was gifted a second chance to let all his sons know how cherished they were. How precious. He'd waste no minute of that. A tight circle of strong arms was soon  embracing him and Scott again, more confirmations of affection all around washing over. There was nothing he'd rather do for the rest of his life.

[vi-who-sims]

Gilmore Girls: Mini Legacy Challenge

Hi everyone my name is Vi, this mini legacy challenge is based on one of my favorite television shows, Gilmore Girls. I tried to play it as close to the story as possible but added a few twists.

I hope you enjoy it. :)

◈ Basic Rules:

Gender is not really specific to any of the generations, although I will specify what gender is recommended/what the gender is in the show.

◈ Generation One: Lorelai “Trix” Gilmore the First

You’re Lorelai “Trix” Gilmore the First a very modest woman. Born into a rich family you’re determined to keep that money in the family. Even if that meant marrying your cousin… well second cousin.

Traits: Proper, Self-Assured, Lazy

Aspiration: Mansion Barron

Career: Stay-at-Home Parent

Gender Recommended: Female

Rules:

Start in a home worth 50,000 Simoleons

Marry your “second cousin” (keeping the Gilmore last name)

Have at least 1 boy and 1 girl child

Become a widow when your Heir becomes an adult 

Move across the “world”

Reach level 6 of the Parenting Skill

Reach at level 3 of Mansion Barron Aspiration

Optional:

Complete the Mansion Barron Aspiration

Reach level 10 of the Parenting Skill

Reach the top rank of Vampirism

◈ Generation Two: The Richard Gilmore

Growing up you were very close to your mother and always did your best to make her proud. You always did well in school and ended up at a prestigious university thanks to your hard work. At university, you met the love of your life and knew she was who you wanted to spend the rest of your life with. The only problem… your mother doesn't approve and tries to get you not to marry her.

Traits: Overachiever, Materialistic, Ambitious

Aspiration: Successful Lineage

Career: Business: Management Branch

Gender Recommended: Male

Rules:

Always get A’s in school

Graduate College with Honors

Go to Britechester for Communications

In your last semester of University, you meet the love of your life (they must be mean and a snob)

Marry your lover although your mother doesn’t approve

Have a falling out with your mother (never reach the red)

Don’t talk to your mother again until your child is a teen

Have only 1 child

Fall out with your child when they runaway as a teen

Reach level 7 of the Logic Skill

Reach level 8 of the Business Career

Reach level 3 of the Successful Lineage

Optional:

Complete the Successful Lineage Aspiration

Max Logic Skill

Reach level 10 of the Business Career

◈ Generation Three: Lorelai Gilmore the Second

Growing up you were the only child. Your mother was overbearing and mean at times but you brushed it off until your teen years. You were never of fan of the frivolous life your parents lived. You were fine just hanging out with your boyfriend at home. Although that leads to a baby. Being a pregnant teen is bad enough but having your parents fight with you over your baby caused you to leave home for good.

Traits: Slob, Goofball, Good

Aspiration: Serial Romantic

Career: Run an Inn (Use 4 Rent)

Gender Recommended: Female

Rules:

Argue with your mother growing up never become more than friends.

Never have more than 2 friends in your childhood

As a teenager date one of your childhood friends

Become pregnant as a teenager

Drop out of high school

Break up with your boyfriend in your third trimester

Runaway from home with your child is an infant

Move to a small town and live in a one-room house until you are halfway through young adulthood

Become best friends with a Sim in the small town

Run an Inn together that you buy when your child is a teen

Don’t date until your child is a teenager

Reconnect with your parents when your child is a teenager

See them once a week from then on

Reach level 8 of Parenting Skill

Reach level 4 of Entrepreneur Skil

Reach level 6 of Comedy Skill

Reach level 3 of Serial Romantic Aspiration

Optional:

Reach level 10 of Parenting Skill

Reach level 5 of Entrepreneur Skill

Reach level 10 of Comedy Career

Complete Serial Romantic Aspiration

Have your Inn reach 5 stars

◈ Generation Four: Lorelai “Rory” Gilmore

Growing up you were raised by a single mother doing her best to make the two of you survive. You did have much contact with your father and you honestly didn’t miss his presence. You spent most of your time studying and having your nose in a book. You always excelled in school but this caused you not to fit in even from a young age. You only had one close friend in school and didn’t talk to many people until high school. Although many people were 

Traits: Overachiever, Genius, Bookworm

Aspiration: Academic

Career: Writer: Journalist Branch

Gender Recommended: Female

Rules:

Reach level 8 of the Research and Debate Skill

Reach level 7 of the Writing Skill

Reach level 8 of the Journalist Skill

Reach level 3 of the Academic Aspiration

Only had one friend all through elementary school.

Read at least 4 books a week

When becoming a teenager visit your grandparents once a week

Halfway through your teen years, you switch schools to a fancy private school for genius’ (make one of their everyday outfits as a school uniform)

Always have an A in school

Graduate high school as Valedictorian

After “switching schools” you meet a boy who is new to town and you immediately fall for each other. You date for a little while but break up.

After breaking up go to a high school party and kiss a boy from your school.

Get back together with your ex for a short period of time until you meet someone new (a bad boy)

Have a fling with the bad boy but never make the relationship official

After you graduate high school you go to your Grandfather’s alma mater Britechester University for Communications

At University you meet a party animal who instantly falls for you and does everything he can until you give in

Date him until you graduate college where he proposes to you and you say no.

Right before you become an adult woohoo with your college ex and your bad boy fling.

Those woohoo's lead to pregnancy

Optional:

Max Writer Career

Complete the Academic Aspiration

Reach level 10 of the Research and Debate Skill

Reach level 10 of Writing Skill

Read one book every day

Never know who the other parent of your child is

◈ Generation Five: The Baby

You’re raised by a single mother with lots of love to give. You saw your grandparents and great-grandparents once a week and formed a good bond with them. You were extremely close with your grandparents. Spending so much time with your grandparent their creativity rubbed off on you. This caused you to fall in love with art.

Traits: Outgoing, Art Lover, Unflirty

Aspiration: Painter Extraordinaire

Career: Freelancer Career: Painter Branch

Gender Recommended: Male (gender is unknown but I feel a male sim fits)

Rules:

Reach level 2 of the Photography Skill

Reach level 7 of the Painting Skill

Reach level 3 of the Painter Extraordinaire Aspiration

Paint at least 3 times a week

Get nothing higher than B’s in school

Become best friends with your grandparent

Always be at least good friends with your parent

As a teen become curious about your other parent

Ask your parent about it

When your parent doesn't have answers you go searching

Although you get stuck at a dead-end

Become a 3 Star Celebrity by selling paintings

When you become a 3-Star celebrity your other parents see your last name and reach out

Find out who your other parent is

When you tell your parent you guys get into an argument

Your parent comes to terms with your findings after a while

Get to know your other parent and form a relationship with them (and your siblings if the parent has other kids)

Optional:

Reach level 5 of Photography Skill

Reach level 10 of Painting Skill

Complete the Painter Extraordinaire Aspiration

Paint 5 times or more a week

Become a 5-Star Celebrity

[archiveofkloss]

There is no question that Karlie Kloss is the ultimate achiever. Known for her work as a supermodel, you may be surprised to learn that Kloss is also an entrepreneur, philanthropist, and mom. And now she can add “Thorne partner” to her resume as the face of our latest global brand campaign, Find Your Way.

Kloss took some time out of her busy schedule to sit down with our team and share a bit about why she loves the brand and what the Find Your Way message means to her.

1. Thanks for taking the time, Karlie! How were you first introduced to Thorne and why do you trust us?

Certainly! I first heard about Thorne from my nutritionist and was drawn to the brand’s meticulous focus on clean, high-quality ingredients. Thorne’s dedication to quality and science is why I trust them. Their process is super transparent, which gives me peace of mind that I’m properly fueling my body.

2. What does the “Find Your Way” message mean to you and how do you embody that in your everyday life? 

For me, it’s about staying curious, finding your own personal way to the healthiest and most meaningful life possible. It’s very authentic to the way I live my life because I’m constantly having to balance my variety of interests and aspirations with my daily health regimen, and overall busy lifestyle.

A lot of people know me for starting my career in fashion as a young girl, but modeling is just one facet of my career – my path has never been linear.

I went back to school, learned to code, and started Kode With Klossy, an organization to teach other young women and gender expansive youth how to code. I also consider myself an athlete. But my most important job is being a mom to my two young boys.

3. What are your favorite Thorne products?

My favorite Thorne products are PharmaGABA-100 to support better sleep, Magnesium CitraMate for overall wellness, and Vitamin C for immune support. I also love Memoractiv for brain health support and the Basic B Complex for enhancing energy. These have all made a big difference in supporting my healthy routine.

4. You love fitness! Can you talk about your passion for movement and how you found it?

It started at a young age with ballet. Ballet taught me the importance of discipline and strength. Over the years, I’ve explored various forms of exercise, from running and cycling to yoga and Pilates. Each activity offers something unique, whether it’s the meditative quality of yoga or the adrenaline rush from a run. Movement is a vital part of my life, helping me stay centered and energized.

5. You also love food! How has your approach to nutrition evolved over your lifetime?

It’s definitely changed! Growing up in the Midwest, I learned to love food from an early age and still love to indulge now. But it’s all about balance, maintaining a healthy relationship with food, and understanding what makes me feel my best. 

As I have gotten older, and through my pregnancies, my relationship to my body and focus on overall wellness has become a lot more holistic. It’s not about fitting into a certain size; it’s about taking care of my body from the inside out so I can keep up with my busy life! 

6. What exercise and nutrition advice do you have for busy readers?

People are always asking me how to manage a busy lifestyle. I’d say finding a routine that works with your schedule is key. Even quick workouts can make a big difference! I try to aim for consistency over perfection.

When it comes to nutrition, I recommend focusing on foods that are packed with nutrients and give you lasting energy throughout the day. And don’t beat yourself up when you indulge – enjoy what you love!

7. You’ve mentioned that you are oddly competitive with yourself about rest! Can you talk about the importance of sleep?

Throughout my teens and twenties, between school, work, traveling, late nights, and early mornings, to try and squeeze in everything I needed to – the thing I would always compromise on if needed would be my sleep.

Something changed during the pandemic when I stopped constantly working and traveling, and actually prioritized my rest. It was life changing. I have found it has helped improve my skin quality, my mood, my energy... I felt like I was suddenly more present in every aspect of my life – my work, my work outs, my relationships. It was a major wake up for me.

So now, I keep track of my sleep patterns and try to stay consistent, even when things get busy. Quality rest helps me do better in every part of my life.

8. People appreciate the importance of fueling for sports performance but fueling for mentally-taxing exercises (for example, coding) seems to fly a bit more under the radar. Can you talk about the importance of getting the nutrients you need to support your creative endeavors?

Research shows that our brains consume around 20 percent of our metabolic energy, so the idea of “brain food” is real! Nutrition and oxygen are crucial for optimal cognitive function, so I focus on foods rich in omega-3s and antioxidants. It's easy to say and harder to do, but staying hydrated, eating balanced meals, and limiting my sugar and caffeine intake help my concentration and creativity.

9. What other wellness topics or facts do you “geek out” over?

I'm a deep believer in the impact mindfulness exercises like meditation and yoga can have on your wellbeing. I'm fascinated by the science of nutrition and how different foods affect our organ function, our cellular health, and overall energy and mood. I'm also very interested in sustainable living and how it connects with personal health.

10. What insights or tips do you have for readers who want to exercise their mind? 

Exercising your mental muscles is just as important as going to the gym! When I have some downtime, I love to read, and I always set aside time every day for meditation, one of my favorite mindfulness exercises.

I’m also working on learning Spanish with my kids. I’m almost fluent in French, so that’s something I wanted them to start learning while they are young so they can use it for a lifetime.