#*insert screaming cowboy meme*

[philicheesecake]

Support my comics!: https://theunseenlegion.thecomicseries.com/supportmywork/

Early access to unreleased comic pages for my Patreon supporters! Your support helps me continue to create this series!

[darklordofthesimp]

that moment when the funny cowboy quote is over the 75 character limit *anguished screams,, insert that one meme image of shinji on the chair* I am a broken man

NOOOOO NOW WHAT

[wordsonly]

The Monster Times

Peeking at far away

Magic dementia

Fabricated, true life, mega adventure

Social justice

Or just this ¿

A world burning-up

In fever bliss.

Together isolated

In his teleplay

Trickle down scream

For the brand new day

The military modeller

Taking flak

A charmless

Unilateral

Anxiety attack

Baseline tremor

Terrored blowback

Galvanised

Astro-zombie attack

A Cyclone tango

In fire rings

Space cadet force gently sings

The ting- a ling boogerloo go-go

Head blow

Comb- over

Podium muppet show

So

Stare at the medium as it mutates

The propagandist, dislocates

Spinning me meme byte sound bites

Stereoscopic 3D highlights

Photo.

Drug.

A view.

A gift.

Red-nosed

Cheese

Kodachromatic shift

To worldwide cowboy amber greased

Boomberz wideboy pouting crease

Real as life sparkling as lies

The

Biggest,

They all tell him,

The greatest

Biggest

Big

Big eyes

All the better to see you with

A folkloric pantomime-ic hiss

Just insert to view your favourite horrors

Thrill at

Billions and billions and billions of dollars

Illustrated

In three dimensions

To Squeezing eyes dry,

Release

The tensions.

[retainermcga]

Alexander's Motorcycle Diaries Episode 9 - Test Object into Test Subject

Bdsm / sexual Royal Psychology

"Alexander & Angelina on behalf of everyone at the Global Live Security Agency I want to apologi." "Neither of us accept apologies. New plan guys. I am sending orders we refuse to risk time reversal with Eternia ordering mission delay" Declared Angelina as she decidedly holds Alexander's hand in public for the first time.

"We at the GLSA need to address the swimsuit." "OH really asshole." Inserts Alexander with pause accepting his dominion will provide more words "triplicated test object event cycle kiss, swimsuit, lunch. Your dialog on approach identifies lack of preparation to both logistically and ethically introduce the topic. Now I am sending orders: We will change the test object into a test subject game test object game adancing our Royal Psychology."

A cell phone rings louder than usual. An agent places the phone on the conference room table. "This is a live call whom is speaking?" A loud first bite of the apple is heard and impressively loud chewing commences from the amplified phone volume as though eleven security and sound tests are being performed. "This is MOM Man or Machine. Response: Alexander is wrong as well. It was kiss, swimsuit off swimsuit on. His silent dialog further ordered us into position to takeover screens and begin training."

An agent screams out "Jesus christ someone call this outfit a wambulance!"

MOM responds "thank you for your resignation. These screens are popping onto a pornogrpahy set my operations has been planning this all day. Belladonna is on set available verbally say hi"

"Hey everyone it's a beautiful day in my neighborhood." A pithy cross reference to the Mister Roger's double bird meme training kit.

Alexander speaks " MOM when will the split screen turn on."

"As soon as you announce the test subject object or movement I will post the determinators. This is why we still held the live meeting and began with sending orders."

"Hey there cowboy you ready to whip this pawgs ass"

"I got whips and ropes I am out of jokes until I've given you pokes ten times tiffany into infinity."

Alexander mentally grabs the mic and speaks "her hat, her boots, and her knee high socks."

The screen populates three weeks delay, about 7 months delay, 329 days delay.

"The hat will be on her head while she is receiving head and we will see if she goes 8 seconds while giving head producer directed pussy licking following foreplay." Came over the conference line

"Enhencement if she takes the time to prop the hat or toss the hat end level." Spiked Alexander.

"Next Level is the boots make it through to hogtie or if her and the boots hang ten during her first anticipated cum from pussy licking. Or are they foreplay to reveal the knee high socks Alexander respond."

"I am starting with a gamble on this ramble with Belladonna onset and hogtie on the board I anticipate there is a good whipping warm up. Obviously to tie the bitch you need to remove the boots. That strap is worth a new Atlanta Hustle interplanetary connection line. The boots up in the air while cowboy whistles her along is the motorcycle are we no longer riding doubles on a side by side unqualified as quantified by the word motorcycle. If she takes them off during foreplay then we have a good rig. If they hold all the way into the hogtie and we win the gamble these will be Union grade Harley Davidsons."

MOM ends the orders "Atlanta Hustle third line will open with 360 variables the system accepts the Harley Davidson to Wynn wager."

The screen populates SOCKS values stars, stripes, Peanuts are black magic.

"Split this between Alexander and MOM."

"If it's Peanuts there will be three sock change designs no visual of performer changing clothes wil be noticed. Corporate licensing confirming this is for the riding gear necessary for the retail Harley Davidson motorcycles."

Belladonna "we made it to control - my ass can fit on the back of his, ready to play win."

"From the cue card: The performers were given three knee high socks to choose. Which is when we get into the video of the video of our body control test subject test object verification of certainty of outcomes."

Alexander closes with "stars means we have the rig. And stripes means new rig equals new design, Peanuts is a scale of opportunities and resources into two Harley Davidons at retail should we achieve excellence in Royal Pyschology and actual magic."

[ladyofvoss]

I'm taking @firelightmuse 's advice and practicing during the days leading up to this year's FFXIV challenge. Dusting the cobwebs off so here we go.

----------

Writing Prompt #2015

"Not every impulse decision I made was a bad one. This time, I managed to help save the world!"

Credit to @promptsforthestrugglingauthor

------------------------------------------------------

"Traders alive, Thalia"

Ibara was a woman of few words, and was not as expressive as the other two Voss sisters, so any moment where she openly expressed even a semblance of frustration was a rare moment indeed.

This was no less different, as Thalia looked up from the tome she was reading to take in the sight of her sister glaring at her metal leg, which was sitting on the small table in her meager little tent, nestled in the midst of the Grand Companies camp.

Thalia couldn't help but grimace at the sight, the leg sporting many dents, scratches, and warping that made the damn thing nearly unrecognizable.

"Sorry" she offered meagerly, to which her sister sighed.

"I suppose it couldn't be helped. Truthfully, I thought you'd come out looking worse after running around in two Garlean fortresses"

"Three, actually", Thalia corrected, earning her an exasperated look from Ibara.

"Thankfully", her sister continued, "your friend Master Garlond offered to help build a new one for you. Still, what did you do to this thing?"

"Technically speaking, it wasn't my fault"

"Ah yes, the immortal, all powerful sorcerer from another world". This came from her left, where her other sister, Narumi, was sitting beside her on her bed, alll proprietary as she poured over the literal dozens of correspondences for Thalia that seemed to appear overnight after Operation Archon concluded.

Thalia frowned. "I thought you were helping me with my letters, not supplying snark"

"I can multi task"

"Don't tell me you're mad. Give me some credit. As Ibara said, it could have gone worse"

"Oh, that changes things. It could have gone much worse than an ancient eldritch power nearly ending your life". Narumi huffed out a sigh before adjusting the papers in her lap.

"Of course I'm not mad. But honestly Tia, of all the muck your impulsiveness has gotten you into-"

"You say that as if I have a habit of getting myself into trouble"

The only response she got was a deadpan look from both her sisters, to which Thalia found herself sputtering in indignation.

"Wha-well.....in my defense, not every impulse decision I made was a bad one. In fact, this time, I managed to help save the world! So, you're welcome"

Narumi simply responded by hitting her with a pillow.

-----------------

Endings suuuuuck.

[gingersmiith]

sunshine deep inside

@ofsylleblossom said:

She comes to Saxham Outpost the way anyone does; by rail, among the common folks. Her money can only last so long, Lunafreya knows, and Saxham seemed the safest, furthest point on the station map. (The fact that she'd spent half the trip talking to the outpost's one school headmaster hadn't hurt, either, securing herself a job even before they pulled into the station.) When she steps off, it's hot, dusty, and she's got no idea where to go next.

One would think a rail stop would make a town bustling, and one would in fact be right -- but the war has taken its toll on everyone, and the rail hadn’t run for four years.

Saxham is recovering, slowly, from war and neglect, and Tredd is cautiously pleased to see it -- so long as the war stays away. Even the trains are running again, though few people actually stop here unless they’re lookin’ to buy a horse from Axis.

So when the fragile-lookin’ blonde lady steps off the rail, Tredd can’t help but raise a brow. She certainly doesn’t seem the type to travel alone, or stop in this sorta town.

But she does look lost, so he shrugs and steps out of the smithy, calling out, “You lost, ma’am?”

[prairiewolve]

@vitalsigned

‘ save it. ’ her voice hisses through the space between them. ‘ just go. everyone leaves anyway, maybe it’s time you followed suit. so just go.’

he started this wrong-- pretty much the same way he’s ever started everything in life. jesse’s ma told him once that he’d been born feet first, even came into the world the wrong way around, or maybe he’d just been born to be a runner. just like his damned father before-- the ghost of failure and dodging responsibilities that haunts him even now.    “ angie-- just, would ya at least hear me out here sugar? “ he’d reach for a hand but he knows too well by the cold look in her eye she’d smack it away or dodge it. 

              he’d deserve it anyway. 

“ truth be told--- i was sort of hoping you’d give me a reason not to. “ metal fingers taptaptap against his hip just where the holster ought to be or used to be. take the arm but he couldn’t seem to shake the nervous habit anyway. 

      “ maybe even come with me. things here--- they ain’t like they were.” and he’s too scared to stay is what he doesn’t say. too many shadows and strangers in eyes of friends and family, if it was gonna fall apart... or WHEN it fell apart. goddamn his yellow-belly but he didn’t want to be here when it did. didn’t want her to be here neither. 

[ofstarsandvibranium]

Insert Spiderman Meme Here

Fandom: Marvel (Twitch Gamer AU)

Pairing: Chubby!Bucky Barnes x GN!Reader

Summary: You're livestreaming Among Us for Twitch and you come across another person who's doing the same thing and they also happen to be your favorite gamer??? Whaaaat?

A/N: Based off my post here.

“Hello everyone!” you greeted your viewers that were hopping onto your livestream. You used your split screen feature to show that you were hopping onto Among Us, but you were also to be seen as well. 

“So like I said on my instagram story, I will be playing Among Us. Soooo let’s see how this goes!” 

You typed in your twitch username as your name for your avatar. You then tapped onto a server with seven people. You were assigned the color cyan and you went to pick out your accessory, “What should I wear, peeps? Should I wear a plunger? Oh, how about the flower? Wait! The cowboy hat! Save a horse, ride a cowboy,” you snickered at your statement. 

“Okay. Let’s do this!” you watched as the countdown started and you were assigned to be a crewmate. 

You looked at your list of tasks and proceeded to head to the admin first to swipe your card. Several other people did the same and you caught sight of a username you know, “Hey! BorkyBarks! i wonder if that’s actually him. Anyway, I’m gonna keep going.” your little cyan character went towards electrical and you found lime green dead. You immediately report and you’re all brought to an emergency meeting. 

Many players immediately ask, “Where?”

And you reply, “In electrical. Went fix wires and found lime. Didn’t see anyone else.”

The yellow character, whose username was MacnCheese, asked, “Wait, are you actually Y/N the twitch streamer?”

You look into your camera and shrugged, “Should I tell them the truth?” you read the chat on the side and saw many people say yes, so you did, “Lol yeah. It’s me. I’m streaming right now. Say hi!”

The users say hi and the supposed BorkyBarks exclaimed, “WAIT. I’M STREAMING TOO!” 

And then you craned your neck, looking at the game chat, “WAIT, YOU’RE REALLY BORKYBARKS?!”

“Lol yeah!”

You quickly pull out your phone and tap onto the twitch app, typing in BorkyBarks and see he’s streaming too. 

You screamed, “OH MY GOD, YOU GUYS! IT’S REALLY BORKYBARKS AKA BUCKY BARNES! WE’RE IN THE SAME GAME! HAHAHAHAHA! WHAT EVEN?!”

You quickly type, “LOL THIS IS WILD!” and then tap on skip since everyone else was doing so. 

“Alright. I’m gonna finish these tasks.” you travelled to electrical to do your long task. You did the wiring there, then moved to admin, then while in the middle of fixing the cafeteria wiring, a meeting is called. 

Black, whose username was sndnoods, said, “I SAW ORANGE VENT!”

To which orange replied, “whaddahex i didnt vent!”

Black, “YES YOU DID! I SAW YOU!”

“Hmmmm...,” you pursed you lips and narrowed your eyes, “Should I vote for black or orange?”

You read the chat and got more replies on black than orange, so you voted for black. While waiting for everyone else, you asked, “Hey, Borky, you almost done with tasks?”

He replied, “Yeah. I got two more.”

Then you responded, “Wanna stick together when you’re done?”

“Sure!”

So, black got voted off and he wasn’t the imposter. So the game continued. You went to finish the wiring in the cafeteria, and then empty the garbage shoot in O2. Lastly, you had to go to weapons and shoot debris.

While you were in the middle of it, a death was reported. 

Orange was dead, so that meant they weren’t the imposter either. Some people left the game, so it was only five of you now. You and Bucky as Cyan and Blue, then brown, red, and green. 

Brown said that red was looking sus and green agreed. It seemed like there was a consensus so all of you voted for red, but red was taking a while to vote. So in the meantime, you chatted to Bucky.

“Can I just say that you’re one of my favorite twitch gamer?”

To which he replied, “No way! Same here!”

And then he added, “I meant, you’re my favorite twitch gamer too. lol.”

Then you said, “[insert spiderman meme here]”

Your phone started blowing up with notifications from twitter, so you quickly checked it out.

gamergirlxoxo: OMG. BUCKY AND Y/N ARE BOTH STREAMING ON TWITCH AND THEY ENDED UP IN THE SAME GAME AND THEY’RE EACH OTHER’S FAVE TWITCH GAMER. WE LOVE TO SEE IT.

meesaisamessa: wait, ngl, bucky and y/n would make a really cute gamer couple. i ship it.

Meanwhile on Bucky’s end....

“Oh my god, oh my god,” he cups his round, bearded cheeks and stares at his computer screen and then his camera, “I’m Y/N’s favorite gamer? What? How? I-” he pauses to chuckle in disbelief, “This is so crazy, guys. I’ve been following Y/N’s twitch career from the beginning. They’re an awesome player and so cool and I’M their favorite gamer?! So fucking unreal!”

The meeting ends and, obviously, red is voted off, but isn’t the imposter. 

Bucky’s finished with his tasks, so he goes to follow you to watch you finish your tasks. He wipes his hands on his tshirt that hugs his round belly, “I’m suddenly nervous and I don’t even know why. I’m not, like, actually meeting Y/N, so I don’t know why my hands are super sweaty now. Heh.”

You finish in weapons and he thinks that’s your last task since you start just roaming around. When you get to storage, the doors suddenly shut in front of Bucky and he’s freaking out, “Oh no! Y/N!” he starts running around in circles waiting for the doors to open and when they do, he rushes inside to find your dead body, “OH NO! Y/N!” he reports your body and then types, “I WILL AVENGE YOU Y/N!” and then added, “also they were found in storage. I was with them, but got locked out and when the doors opened, they were dead.”

“It’s gotta be brown.” Green said and Brown immediately defended themselves, “No! It’s Green! They’ve been faking tasks!”

Bucky groaned, “Shit, I don’t know who to choose. Guys, help.”

The chat started blowing up with different people saying Brown or Green, but a lot of people were saying green. 

“Alright, I’m trusting you guys!” he votes green and then the Victory screen appears. 

“Aaayyee! We did it!” when he’s back in the lobby, he immediately goes into the chat, “Y/N, I AVENGED YOU!”

You replied, “lmao! thank you! green was a punk for that!”

He smiled at the screen and then checked the chatbox:

ZoeSmoey: LOOK AT THOSE HEART EYES!

ZoeSmoey: BUCKY TOTALLY LIKES Y/N!

greenmeansgtfo: tell them you love them! lol!

thatspideyguy: Dude, go for it. Message them!

He snorts, “We don’t even know each other, guys! I don’t wanna be creepy and shit!”

He reads the incoming messages of encouragement and then throws his hands up in the air, “Fine!” he picks up his phone and pulls up his twitter. He knows you two are mutuals, so he goes into your DMs and types up, “Hi. I know we’ve been following each other for a while, but I figured I’d give a proper greeting, not on the livestream.” when he’s done typing, he looks at his camera, “There, I did it, guys. I don’t think they’ll-”

Ping!

He looks down at his phone to see that you replied and his eyes widened, “I stand corrected!”

The two of you proceed to make your own Among Us server. Bucky is the host and he sends you the code. As soon as you’re in, he opens it up to the public and people start pouring in. You two play for another hour before you have to go. 

You leave him a DM saying, “That was fun! We should play again sometime! Let me know! xxx-xxx-xxxx”

And it was the start of a beautiful friendship. 

[theoriesontheory]

Can Your Heart Be on Your Sleeve while Your Tongue is In Your Cheek?

Irony, Sincerity and the Internet

In their video essay “David Foster Wallace – The Problem with Irony” Schoder breaks down David Foster Wallace’s views on the downfall of entertainment, namely tv due to a saturation of irony. (2016) After introducing the problem of an overly ironic, snake devouring itself, media landscape, the solution seems to be proposed, a tonal shift towards sincerity. (ibid) Shows like The Office and Community and Parks and Recreation in some cases maintain post-modern traits in order to subvert them but more and more, mainstream media is focusing less on the deconstruction of the meta narrative and more focused on the micro-relationships. (ibid.)

In August of 2017 Kirin J. Callinan uploaded the music video for his latest single “Big Enough” featuring Alex Cameron, Molly Lewis and Jimmy Barnes. In September of 2017 a tumblr page posted a clip from the video, which was later uploaded to youtube and went viral as “Screaming Cowboy” (knowyourmeme, 2018)

The remixes and overdubs spread like wildfire and to this day, through apps like tik tok and Instagram the song and meme is heard around the world by listeners who potentially could never have heard anything else the artists have done or anything beyond the 43 second clip. In interviews on the piece featured artist Alex Cameron explains that the piece came out of the idea that people would constantly compare himself and Callinan in the relatively small Sydney Pop scene and thinking about how the world is so often divided. They wanted to remind people that everything wasn’t all about conflict but there can be unity. (Fluffy, 2018) Callinan himself describes the song as “sincere.” (Gaca, 2017) Beyond being a song about unity, represented by the two artists coming together but it also represents a deconstruction of genre boundaries for the artist. When first experimenting with making EDM, a genre he did not care for Callinan describes making something “aesthetically displeasing and pretty unexciting as an idea,” with “a euphoria that’s just infectious.” (ibid.) He continues, detailing how after hearing Sweedish House Mafia’s ‘Don’t You Worry Child’ that he was able to get past his own preconceived and taught notions of genre and boundaries between high and low art and understand that the heart of the work was important. (ibid.) This is immediately shown in this piece, bringing together the unique blend of two underground pop artists from Sydney, a world famous whistler and an Australian Rock icon. This song is the perfect representation of the idea of synthesis, it feels like a creative artist having fun while telling a sincere and genuine story about unity, not only in the lyrics but in the production of the song and the incorporation of a diverse range of cultural touchstones, the work is an intellectual masterpiece!

… But it’s still a meme and I didn’t actually listen to the whole song until around two years after it came out when I finally heard it through a bad Bluetooth speaker in a backyard somewhere. The question then stands, does the fact that something is a meme make it any less valuable as art? Looking back at the Schoder video, the first wave thinking of post modern media, the thinking that spawned shows like Seinfeld and Always Sunny, (2016) would say that this song was brilliant and funny. It’s a deconstruction of the notions of pop and using all kinds of semiotic messages that are understood by the knowledgeable and reference soaked internet generation, it did exactly what it was meant to do clearly, it’s making fun of the entertainment industry. And while it is all of those things I don’t think that is all the song is. I think this song is an example of an Office type TV show as described by Schoder. (2016) this song and the video does all of those things but still feels very human and genuine. It doesn’t stop at the deconstruction but also works on focusing to the right thing, connection and community.

Despite this wholesome message at the song’s core, some argue that the last refrain takes the song into parody

Image: Screenshot of Lyrics to ‘Big Enough’ from Genius.com

But if you think about songs that have called for peace and unity before,

Image: Screenshot of Lyrics to ‘Imagine’ from Genius.com

 I think that ‘gen z’ who was raised in cynicism would see both sentiments as equally as realistic. Meaning the only differences between the two songs are the choice of instrumentation and who’s singing it. Toward the end of the Gaca interview Callinan says, “I’d like to write more songs that are emotional and real and not full of so much fucking bullshit. But at the same time, it’s the bullshit that makes it fun. No one’s interested in listening to an acoustic singer-songwriter.” And I think that this song is a move in that direction for him.

To insert some of my own romantic thinking, in a way the fact that this song is being shared to so many different people in so many different contexts as humour, shows that the message of unity is being spread through comedy.

While the internet took this song and video and gave them a life of their own, at their core still stands an artist with a message. While a majority of people might know the song as humour, Callinan was able to achieve his artistic goal and make a song that he enjoys, as well as collaborating with a friend in Alex Cameron, an interesting and unique person in Molly Lewis and a childhood hero in Jimmy Barnes. It was funny, it was serious, it was entertaining, it is art.  

References:

Gaca, A. (2017, November 8). What Exactly Is Going On With Kirin J. Callinan? Spin. https://www.spin.com/featured/kirin-j-callinan-bravado-interview/

Fluffy. (2018, January 18). Interview: Alex Cameron Talks Style and Substance. Under the Radar. https://www.undertheradar.co.nz/news/13758/Interview-Alex-Cameron-Talks-Style-And-Substance.utr

Knowyourmeme, (2018). Big Enough. https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/big-enough

Schoder, W. [Will Schoder]. (2016 October 7). David Foster Wallace – The Problem With Irony [Video]. YouTube. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2doZROwdte4

Other media in order:

Kirin J Callinan. (2017 August 17). Kirin J Callinan - Big Enough (Official Video) ft. Alex Cameron, Molly Lewis, Jimmy Barnes [Video]. YouTube. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rvrZJ5C_Nwg

CarrierBK (2017 September 9) AHHHHH [Video]. YouTube. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yBLdQ1a4-JI

Image: Screenshot of Lyrics to ‘Big Enough’ from Genius.com Captured 07/07/2021 https://genius.com/Kirin-j-callinan-big-enough-lyrics

Image: Screenshot of Lyrics to ‘Imagine’ from Genius.com Captured 07/07/21 https://genius.com/John-lennon-imagine-lyrics

Red Lama (2017 October 5) Dank Meme Compilation – Big Enough [Video]. YouTube. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RWc-7Q8NbVA

[what-a-messsss]

2x1 rewatch

My poor Netflix is so confused.  I’ll hop on my phone to see if I can find a detail in an ep and then it’ll try to start the show again at halfway through 4x7 or the end of the finale, and I have to figure out what ep I’m actually looking for.

All aboard for “Unquiet Mind.”

Ok, realizing that Jacob and Vic are both ‘play with the radio’ types and Henry and Walt are both ‘or silence’ types is probably a bit funnier to me that it should be.  Didn’t really expect to be finding character parallels between those two.  

BAAAABY!  I totally forgot about the baby buffalo!  Eeeeee!  

Interesting that the prisoner (whose name I have totally braindumped, whoops) knows that Walt would know about the meaning of the white buffalo to the Cheyenne.

$10 says that doctor agent is a redhead because of Starling.  For being 2% of the population, redheads sure do make up a disproportionate part of fictional character real estate.  (I say with lots of love for Cady...)

Also, I feel offended on behalf of both the Red Pony and the Busy Bee by the sign Cowboy’s Corner claiming they have the best food in 3 counties.  Piffle.

“Progress.  Prosperity.  People.  I’m Branch Connally, and I can alliterate.  Vote for the PP People.”  Shut uuuuuup.  Jacob, I’m blaming you for this.  If it weren’t for you, he wouldn’t have had the money to be annoying us even when he’s hours away.  Boooo.  (I mean, obviously also blame Barlow, but that’s more of a ‘with a shovel to the face’ kind of blaming, rather than an eyeroll and calling ‘boooo’ at the screen because your fav was a pain.)

Ah ha, title drop.  I haven’t really paid that much attention to the episode titles, I’ll be honest.  This is the only title drop I can actually remember other than Jacob’s line about “Dogs, horses, and Indians,” although it still bothers me immensely that the episode title doesn’t have the Oxford comma, omGs.  

Durrel’s discoloured eye is really good.  I’m guessing a scleral contact lens?  Just different enough to be noticeable and a little off-putting without drawing too much focus.  It keeps the mental discomfort we get from it just around the unconscious level.

That’s right!  Ruby is out of town!  Min and I decided that she was at a conference in Idaho Falls, since we had already said that her family lives in Texas, and I like the idea of her also doing vocational enrichment training and keeping on the cutting edge of her wheelhouse of policing.  She’s a heckin’ boss, and I adore her.

This is the most random thing in the world, but that’s sort of my wheelhouse... Does Katee Sackoff have a scar on the tip of her nose?  Because I swear at 9:09-11 it looks like it.  Not that it matters, but I’ve never noticed it any other time, and now I’m really curious.

Ope, longer hair Henry in this flashback.  With emotions and it’s killing me.  I also didn’t think about the fact that the Halfmoon’s were talking to the white police instead of (in addition to?) the tribal police.  Though that would have been during Malachi’s reign, since it was 4 years ago.  Oof.

Is that a gas fire?  Because if that’s one of the lines on fire, isn’t the whole place in serious danger of going up in a massive explosion?  There was an explosion like that locally last year and it took out the whole station and killed two people.  Please tell me they called in the fire as soon as they saw it when they were pulling up.  (Of course they didn’t, who are we kidding.  It’s these two.)

So they’ve been driving along with their lights on, pull up maybe 8 feet from the abandoned prison van...  explain to me why he turns his headlights off at that point?  Anybody waiting to ambush them is going to have their eyes more adjusted to the dark, and these two loose the light and there is already no element of surprise because they pulled right up to the van.  Why did you turn the lights off, Walt?  I mean, maaaaaaybe the headlights being on would have reflected off of the van windows and make it harder to see inside?  But that is not particularly good reasoning, I feel.  (Meta guess being that the director/whomever figured that the lights off left them in a colder colour palate and heightened the drama.  Which... they’re not wrong.  But whyyyyyyy would Walt turn them off, not the director?)

“Come on out and I won’t shoot you!” prisoner McGoober yells, having just tried to take Vic out with a shot to center mass.  Ok, sure buddy, we believe you.  The laser sight catching the falling snowflakes does look cool.

Good use of an elbow, Walt.  I’m not actually sure if it was supposed to be a punch but wasn’t lined up great with the camera, but I’m ruling it an on purpose elbow, because Walt is absolutely a dirty fighter, and an elbow is more likely to lay somebody out if you’re close enough.

Oo, what amazing precautions you’re taking.  You actually grabbed a scarf.  And my gods, gloves.  ...work gloves?  Which I know from experience save next to no heat, what the hell, Walt.  I just... why hasn’t he closed his fucking coat??  ::screaming::  Staving off hypothermia isn’t emasculating, you KNOB.  Well at least the snowbunny actually brought a flashlight.  How forward thinking of him.  And has zipped up his coat.  Lawd.

Ew, I just agreed with Branch.  :(  How dare the writers make that happen.

And in strolls Agent Pretty von Douche to make everything just that much more annoying.  Special Agent in Charge Towson, FBI.  Burrpaderrpaderp. Myeh.  

Such special, very agent, much in charge, wow.  >insert doge meme here, lol<

“Whose in charge in his absence?”  Hmmmmmmm.  They ended the shot on Vic, and the look on her face is just... prophetic for how I figure she handles being in charge when Walt abruptly decides to fuck off into the wilderness for the Treasure Hunt portion of his Manly Midlife Crisis, before they can have an election.  Lol.  Womp womp.

Dang, spit strings dangling from your stubble is... uh, a look.  >.>  Did you know that your nose is one of the first parts of you that tends to get frostbite?  And that we know you have a scarf?  (Yelling at Walt is my new hobby.  It’s not a good hobby, but it is mine.)

HI HENRY.  Great, you’re at the hallucinating part of the fieldtrip.  Not that I’m complaining, because even your imaginary Henry is more sensible that you will generally let yourself be.  (Also, he’s pretty, and I am very shallow.)

Yeeee, one of the only poems that I actually have memorized.  Lovely Robert Frost.  Though Robert Burns would also be quite apt.  And miles to go before I sleep and all.  

“The cavalry has arrived.”  Henry is so fucking droll.  I can just imagine the little kernel of muted glee he has at the irony of using that phrase.  I adore him.  “We ate,” says von Douche.  Honey.  Booboo.  

Fuck off, von Douche.  He’s so In Charge.   Burrpaderrpaderp, pthb.  “Any request for activities will go through me.”  That’s so cute.  And Henry’s look would kill you at a thousand paces.  

It does annoy me that Vic keeps calling him Walt when talking about him with the fibbies.  Like, we get it, you’re real close with your boss, but you might get more traction with them by reinforcing the fact that he’s a fellow law enforcement officer and the head of your department by calling him the Sheriff rather than broadcasting how unprofessional you both are.  

Bless Ferg for actually speaking up, though.  Branch just falls in line without a peep (though if I remember, he’s plotting his own little insurrection.)  And Henry is just quietly in the background, gathering data and being invisible as he decides to be.

“I don’t like your tone.”  Well I don’t like you FACE.  That’s actually a lie, it’s a very nice face.  But you’re just such a douchecanoe.

For all that Branch is a rusty wingnut, he does occasionally have decent observational skills.  And he is less emotionally riled, so he sees that Henry is planning something while Vic is too busy fuming.  I’m wondering how that lands with Ferg/why he doesn’t notice, and I think he’s still just isn’t very good at thinking out of the box yet.  Or seeing stuff that’s out of the box.  He definitely gets better about it as time goes on, but it’s an interesting thing to think about as far as his character development.  He’s focused on what he can think of to help, and isn’t expanding that to see thinking about what others might be able to do to help, which Branch does, but Vic doesn’t.  

The gunshots in the cabin and the lever action rifle and all are taking me straight to the beginning of Red Dead2.  Sadie, is that you?  Nope, it’s Omar, aaaaahahaha, I forgot he was in this.

I love that Henry keeps his saddle at home/the bar.  I don’t know why I’m surprised, though.  Maybe figured that he’d keep it where the horses are stabled, I guess.  But I can imagine him keeping it close in case, and cleaning the tack and oiling the saddle as a way to unwind after a hard day or something.

Heeeeehehehe, the look on Henry’s face when he leans in to Branch and goes, “...supporting the FBI.”  Such a beautiful way of expressing how very little he thinks of Branch without ever having to say it.  “Right now, I am the sheriff.”  You are so deeply obnoxious.  And do not play nice with others.

And here’s Walt with his circumstantial evidence, laying out his assumptions, and being right, which is all good and such now, but he is so in the habit of doing this shit and being right that he cannot accept when he isn’t right about things.

Well at least Omar has his place stocked for the weather.  I know I fall farther on the ‘over prepare’ end of the spectrum, but Walt not having better gloves in his truck in the dead of winter makes me roll my eyes so dang hard.

This hallucination of Fales is a fascinating bit of character study both for Walt and for Fales.  Walt’s subconscious effectively calling him out for his suicidal tendencies with not there Fales asking him, “Are you looking to get yourself killed?” is more honesty than it seems like Walt tends to allow himself.

ASAC Hall is actually better at dealing with people like a human, but von Douche isn’t actually wrong.  Vic is understandably pissed by the withheld information, but she does stomp around like a bull in a china shop and pretty much never stops to think.  Maybe they all would have gotten farther if von Douche or Hall had asked the night before if the locals had other options, but unlikely.  

I FORGOT SHE PUNCHED HIM.  The look on Hall’s face was priceless.

Eeeeeee, I do love that Walt left a trail, knowing that Henry would be coming after him.  Branch’s comments to Henry show that while he can observe people and sometime predict how they’re going to act, he can’t really understand why they’re doing it, if it’s beyond his own lens of experiences (which are pretty fucked up).  Whether it’s cynicism or just stunted empathy, conceiving of someone’s motivations being selflessly altruistic are just beyond his ken.  That’s pretty sad, honestly, and makes me hate Barlow even more.  Everything in Branch’s life has been transactional, calculated.

Oh, and now he pulls something up over his mouth.  Ok.  Great, into the water.

I fucking love Ferg.  His gleeful awe over Vic hitting Towson literally made me press my hands to my face, giggling.  And he’s such a good friend.  And she’s such a pill.  I get that she’s feeling guilty and hurting, but it takes no effort not to take it out on Ferg.  How easy would it have been to say, “Somebody has to keep working on finding them.  Go back inside, Ferg,” instead of “You have to get out of here,” and just running him off like a jerk.

Cady having cut off contact with Walt gives me life.  AND THEN his shitty self-protecting LYING brain comforts him by having her say, “You were only trying to protect me, Dad, I get that,” because that’s what he keeps telling himself to excuse taking her agency away and lying to her for at least a year, and continuing to manipulate her!  GAAAAAH!  “I can’t lose you...”  THEN CHECK YOUR DAMN SELF, DISASTER BOI.

I’m not sure if hallucination!Theo telling him that there was nothing he could do is a sign of a healthy recognition of that, or the same kind of lying to himself because it’s what he wants to hear that he’s done with Cady?  The “...but I knew someone was coming to help me,” rather smacks of the latter, since earlier in the ep Walt says that that’s what he would want to know if he were held hostage.

I have decided (with my shippy goggles firmly in place, if not molecularly fused to my face) that him doubting that Henry is coming to help him is what makes him realize that he’s getting hypothermia.  Because the idea that Henry wouldn’t be coming to get him is so utterly ridiculous that clearly his brain is on the fritz.

The fact that the phone works after his dunking is also a minor miracle.  I know I said earlier that Walt is a dirty fighter, but oof, he’s the one who just took a dick shot.  I mean, that’s one way to use a cell phone.

Again, not super sure what it says about Walt for him to imagine Theo watch him in the process of killing Durrel.  Poor Henry.  That whole mess would have been incredibly stressful.  Your jackass boyfriend is way high maintenance in rather spectacular ways.

[vitulum]

duskrot replied to your post: duskrot replied to your post: ...

they are not and YES HE DID . THIS IS WHAT HE FELL FOR !!

Yyl’s mind: *insert screaming cowboy meme*

[namelesskitten22]

ASFDSKLGF KITTY!!! D8 YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO REBLOG IT I JUST NEEDED PEOPLE TO KNOW YOU GOOBER!!! *insert that one screaming cowboy meme*

OooooOOOooooh leeeeeei you know I had tooooooo. >w>

[visible-bisexual-confusion]

*insert screaming cowboy meme audio here*

Braiden Scream

[blauliebling]

hello toads @asrekt bullied me into doing this questionnaire for my apprentice asphodel and we’re ride or die so i gotta

Part 1.) Characterization. Use these questions as a way to flesh out some of your character’s personality, background, likes/dislikes, etc.

Their surname?

Sabbagh !

Halloween costume?

Oh fuck idk ?? probably some sort of like, elemental being maybe? 

Familiar/animal friend?

He has a spotted gecko named Diego! Lil boy lives in his pants but it’s always the pants he’s not wearing 

Big spoon or little spoon?

My main pairings with Ash are Asra and Portia so he’s lil spoon w/ As and big spoon with Porsh 

Religious?

Not really nope

Favorite fruit?

Grapefruit! Eats them at breakfast 

Idea of a nice date?

Literally anything. He’s very easy to please. He just wants to hold ur hand

Favorite season?

Summer b/c it’s warm 

When is their Birthday?

August 23rd!

Favorite carnival ride?

Swings

Favorite emoji?

The flame emoji

Like to do in their free time?

He really likes to just. See sights and go exploring and that good stuff. Broaden his horizons 

What sports would they play?

What kind of car would they drive?

How do they treat their significant other when they’re feeling unusually affectionate?

You got a puppy on your hands and I am so sorry he’s going to be sooo cuddly and whiny 

Favorite manga?

I haven’t read enough for this but I’m feelin Heart No Kuni No Alice 

Main store to shop for clothes (if they lived in our world)?

Forever 21 probably 

What were they like growing up?

The lizard and mud pie child

What kind of drunk are they at a party?

A giggly one 

Reaction to someone telling a dirty joke?

Probably blush and be surprised but then laugh because it’s still funny as fuck

Reaction to stubbing their toe?

A Scream

Favorite color?

Purple, surprisingly 

Favorite See’s chocolate?

A truffle I’d like to say, or something fruity 

Favorite poptart flavor?

Chocolate strawberry 

Favorite hobby?

The Lizards........

How they sing at karaoke parties?

Horribly 

Preferred social media platform?

Probably instagram 

Opinion on puns?

Absolute comedic genius ironically 

How do they typically deal with their problems?

BOTTLE THAT SHIT AND CRY IN PRIVATE LATER 

Spice girl nickname?

robin said twinky spice but he’s baby spice truly. or lizard spice 

Personal hygiene routine?

Bathe and drink water that’s it 

Favorite alcoholic drink?

Favorite genre of music?

Acoustic shit no matter whether it’s the original or not 

Modern AU job/career?

This is typical as fuck but probably a fire breather at like Cirque du Soleil or something 

Favorite musical?

Of the few musicals I personally know probably uh. Matilda 

How would they celebrate their significant other’s birthday?

The best date EVER aggressively trying to top every previous year

Would they rather turn into a tiny rhinoceros or a giant hamster?

Tiny Rhino 

What would they do for their significant other for Valentine’s Day?

Same as birthday but with saucier sex probably 

Pros and cons to having them as a roommate?

Pros: a sweet important good boy who always wants to accommodate u

Cons: u are now the proud parent of at least ten lizards and other reptiles 

On a scale from 1-10 how Extra are they?

A 0.2 everything he does is genuine 

Favorite meme?

THE COOL GUY MEME

Favorite three pokemon?

Kecleon, Cyndaquil, and Charmander 

How tall are they?

5 feet 8 inches 

Part 2.) Scaling. Using your best judgement, where does your fan apprentice fall on these scales?

[Example: Shortest to tallest?

Portia, Asra, [MC name here], Nadia, Lucio, Julian, Muriel]

Most to least superstitious?

Portia, Julian, Asphodel, Nadia, Lucio, Asra, Muriel

Most to least excited to be at a WWE event?

Portia, Lucio, Asra, Julian, Nadia, Muriel, Asphodel

Worst to best at handling children?

Nadia, Lucio, Muriel, Asra, Asphodel, Portia, Julian

Worst to best alcohol tolerance?

Muriel, Asra, Asphodel Lucio, Julian, Portia, Nadia

Best to worst at keeping secrets?

Asra, Muriel, Nadia, Asphodel, Lucio, Portia, Julian

Best to worst dancers?

Asra, Portia, Asphodel, Julian, Nadia, Lucio, Muriel

Most to least likely to slap you for stealing a mcnugget?

Nadia, Lucio, Asra, Portia, Julian, Muriel, Asphodel

Least to most likely to eat something weird on a dare?

Nadia, Julian, Muriel, Asphodel, Lucio, Portia, Asra

Least to most old?

Asra, Asphodel ( he’s 21 so I don’t fuckin know ) Portia, Muriel, Julian, Lucio, Nadia

Part 3.) Extra characterization tidbits (whether you want to make a description or insert a photo for these is up to you!)

MC as a:

•MCR song

Fuck as cliche as this is probably teenagers but I don’t know that many 

•vine

the cowboy bebop lizard vine

•a piece of furniture

ffuck probably a lamp

•character from the Labyrinth

I DON’T KNOW IF HE HAS A NAME BUT THE FUCKING BLUE WORM WITH A SCARF 

•character in a cliche Noir film

the sad mail room intern 

•Tarot card

strength probably 

•Michael Jackson song

SMOOTH CRIMINAL BUT ONLY BECAUSE OF THE ONE VINE 

•character in the play “Cats”

•Panic! at the disco song

i feel like golden days is something he would dance to

•cliche high school student stereotype

honestly idk but he’d probably wear a shit ton of crop tops and have a lizard in his pocket 

•furby

•flight rising dragon breed

•deadly sin

sloth

•DnD class

•character from Mean Girls

•hogwarts house

his interests say slytherin but his personality says hufflepuff 

•cryptid

Nessie is his gf 

•monster factory character

slime grandma from da:i

[mistermike1967]

Nintendo Switch Presentation Livestream Reaction Log

Hot off the press, here are my thoughts on the Switch Stream!

9:50 - Began writing. 10:00 - Finally found the stream. The first thing that popped up was streams by ya boy Etika, Rich of ReviewTechUSA, etc. 10:01 - My ass is ready. 10:06 - I have now come to the realization that I'm gonna have to find something to do for about an hour. 10:07 - Guess I'll just post some hopes for the stream then. I really hope the new Mario game is more open like Super Mario 64 was, 'cos as much as I love Super Mario 3D World, I really miss being able to travel through parallel universes. 10:09 - I caught a shiny Mimikyu today. Cute as fuck but has a Calm nature, which lowers it's attack. Thankfully this doesn't mean much when it's attack is +4. 10:28 - There's music playing now. I did not expect this. 10:32 - I HEAR HORSES NOW. Oh wait, it's just the Switch tariler. 10:34 - God this song is fuckin' good. "I need you like bacon needs eggs." 10:40 - 20 Minutes. God this is taking FOREVER. 10:44 - OH SHIT IT'S A STAGE. Neon lights and everything, man this won't give me seizures. 10:45 - Nice trance(?) music. Too bad it can't calm me down from this hypegasm. (Did I really just fucking say "hypegasm"? The fuck is wrong with me?) 10:50 - 10 Minutes...! The anticipation is murdering me... 10:51 - If this is all just the fucking console I'm gonna be... mildly dissapointed. Seriously, they'd better show off some games for this thing. Not ports or remakes, GAMES. 10:55 - 5 Minuets! Alsmost there...! 10:57 - Shit seems to be quieting down a tad. 10:58 - The overlay is gone now. We're nearly there... 10:59 - Here we go. 11:00 - IT'S STARTING!! Oh shit there's a countdown! 10:01 - Thirty seconds! 10:02 - IT BEGIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINS!! 10:03 - President dude is out. Kimishima is here. Talkin' 'bout that Switch. 10:04 - Launch date and price! March 3rd SHIT THAT'S SO CLOSE!! And the price is... 29,980 Yen, $299.99 NIGGAS IT'S PRETTY CHEAP SORTA! You can do online shit with smart devices. Sounds good. 10:05 -  Paid online service?! WTF?! NO REGION LOCKING AWW SHIT YES!! 10:06 - Another dude is comin' up on stage. 10:07 - Just goin' over the previous consoles and controllers. NINTENDO CONSOLES LEND SWITCH YOUR ENEGRY!! 10:08 - Switch Trailer. Shit we already know. Where are the games? 10:09 - Play styles. MK8 Switch gameplay shown. Looks pretty sweet. NEW BATTLE MODE STUFF! 2.5 Hrs to 6 Hrs of battery life. Meh. 8 controllers can connect at once. 11:12 - Game stuff imcoming! Detailed look at the controllers. Looks nice. He's stripping the controllers! Damn, that's lewd. Going over controlls. NFC in the right Joycon. 11:13 - Dedicated screenshot button. It's pretty much just all the other consoles merged together. 11:14 - "Sharing the Joy." (LENNY) 11:15 - Red and Blue Joycons! Joycon straps! Tennis time my dudes! 11:16 - Sensors in the Joycon. WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS WIZARDRY?! REALISTIC ICE CUBE SENSORS CONFIRMED!! 11:17 - NEW GAMES YESSSSSS!! Cowboy game...? Jesus christ this is so cheesy. 11:19 - What is this shit? Fucking western duels and and wizardly? Huh. Not really my thing. 11:20 - 1, 2, Switch? I have no idea what to think about this. Video games without screens. What the fuck. Okay, this is just fucking stupid. 11:21 - This coybow and cowgirl image needs a JoJo edit. Fucking party games, man. 11:22 - Released alongside Switch launch. New game. What is this. Oh god is it fucking sumo? Japanese are weird. 11:23 - Is this... a boxing game? Okay, now i'm confused. Oh shit, the protags looks cute. 11:24 - New IP. Looks fucking lit. Porn is already being drawn. 11:25 - ARMS. God this looks like fun. This is fucking crazy. Little Mac confirmed? 11:26 - Battle showcase. Let's go. Spring Man vs. Ribbon Girl. Wait, Ribbon GIRL?! FUCKING TRIGGERED! 11:27 - "Oh, Spring Man won." Misogyny won lol. Online confired. Spring 2017. 11:28 - A weapon to surpass Splatoon?! No wait here's Splatoon. 11:29 - Looks good! Dark Souls rolling confirmed? 11:30 - New weapons. God this looks INSANE! Splatoon 2! Voiceover guy is very enthused I can assure you. 11:31 - Splat Duelies. I'm already giggling heartily. Missle Launchers. 11:32 - Splatoon 2 coming this summer! 11:33 - "What Squid you think?" 11:34 - Splatoon Mobile game? New Mario game! Oh shit Mario is wrecking this up in New York. OH SHIT SM64-like MARIO!! 11:35 - Mario can toss his FUCKIN CAP?! LIKE A WEAPON?! God this looks so fucking EPIC!! 11:36 - Super Mario Odessey. HIS CAP IS ALIVE WHAT THE FUCK! OH MY GOD I'M SO FUCKING HAPPY! 11:37 - Mario Sight-seeing Simulator. Christmas 2017 WHYYYYYYYYYYYY?! 11:39 - Monolithsoft game. New Xenoblade game? Looks anime as fuck. 11:40 - Xenoblade 2. Looks neat I guess. New Fire Emblem game? Oh shit it is. Fire Emblem. Yeah, that's Fire Emblem alright. 11:41 - Fire Emblem Warriors? Huh, sounds neat. MORE GAMES! Dragon Quest 10 and 11 on Switch. Dragon Quest Heroes. 11:42 - Atlus has a new game. Looks ominous. Is it Persona? 11:43 - Yep, it's Persona. Not really my thing. Another game, this time by Square Enix. Cute pixel art. 11:44 - Project Octopath Traveler? Neat. Oh, and that wasn't Persona I guess. It's Shin Megami Tensei. 11:45 - Dude from SEGA talking now. 11:46 - Dude from SEGS not talking anymore. Todd Howard reveals Skyrim. Nobody is shocked by this. 11:47 - Toddie jerking off the Switch like a pro. Suda51 guy screams like a weirdo. Wonder what he's offering. 11:48 - No More Heroes 3? Cool! I've heard that game is pretty good. 11:49 - And now he's gone. By Suda guy! 11:50 - OH BOY HERE WE GO IT'S (((EA))). FIFA shit. Whatever, don't care. Bill Trinnen doing a bang-up job at translating. 11:51 - You can almost see the truth buried under all his lies. 11:53 - Alright, next person. Sizzle reel time! 11:55 - Sizzle reel end! Lots of games. 11:56 - Talking about what's included in the purchase. Can't wait for the memes and YouTube Poops. 11:57 - Two versions, only difference is the Joycon colours. 11:58 - OH GOD THE ENGRISH!! Events kicking off for Europe. More events later. Nice. 11:59 - REGGIE TIME! *Insert standard reference* Reggie knows that we meme. 12:00 - "Man, WHAT GAMES." Breath of the Wild. Where is it? 12:01 - Reggie snitching on Miyamoto. No bitch niggas, no snitch niggas. This sketch boy. 12:02 - Breath of the Wild release date is... AWW MORE TALKING. Support earned. One more thing! 12:03 - Breath of the Wild trailer. Looks gorgeous! Master Sword confirmed! 12:04 - God this looks awesome! SAND BOSS! Water Arrows? 12:05 - NAKED ZELDA?! Damn! Red-Haired cutie confirmed. GOGONS CONFIRMED!! OH DAMN THERE'S TOO MUCH SHIT! 12:06 - Release date? MARCH 3RD BABY IT'S A LAUNCH TITLE!! 12:07 - Stream is over. Pretty good. 7/10 perfectly satisfying.

[treki684]

You know what this seems the /Purr/fect opportunity to insert the screaming cowboy meme  XD