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sunshinetoshi · 4 years ago

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New Dad Moments

Kuroo Tetsurou, Oikawa Tooru, and Tanaka Ryuunosuke

A/N: lots of self-indulgent fluff and some hq boy chaos. Tanaka’s was so funny to me like picturing it but it’s also half the length of the other two oops. pregnancy/labor/delivery and slight language (like really slight)

KUROO

You and your husband were taking your new baby boy home from the hospital. You sat by the hospital window, holding your son close as you waited for Kuroo to come back from packing the car. Your baby was blinking up at you and you felt your heart could combust right there. You started talking to your son, telling him how much you loved him. His little eyes looked sleepy but it made you smile how much they looked like Kuroo’s eyes. “I wonder what you’re going to be like when you’re all grown up.” He squirmed a little in your arms and you softly stroked his little arm. “Are you going to grow up like your dad? What do you think? If you do I know you’ll have an amazing heart, just like him.” You placed a small kiss on his head. You turned when you heard a soft knock on the door.

Tetsurou smiled at you two adoringly, “Let’s go home.”

After settling all your things you three had a moment to relax on your bed. “He’s so beautiful,” Tetsurou whispered.

You nodded in agreement. You couldn’t believe your baby was real. You were mesmerized. You were brought back to reality when you heard sniffling next to you. You looked at Kuroo. “Hey why are you crying?” you cooed.

Tetsurou had been especially emotional since he first held his son. Just this morning you caught him crying as he rocked his baby boy.

Kuroo used the sleeve of his sweater to wipe at his runny nose. “I love him so much I can’t comprehend it.” He furiously tried to wipe away his tears. He chuckled, “Damn it, I keep crying.” His eyes went wide and he slapped his hand over his mouth, “Damn, I just cursed..” Another look of realization hit him. “Aw, shit I just said damn again! Aghh wait I can’t stop! Motherfu-”

You quickly gasped and whacked him on the chest before he could finish, “Tetsu!”

A strangled noise fell out of him and his face went pale. “Y/N,” he threw his head onto your shoulder in despair. You tried to comfort him so you smoothed his hair. You knew he didn’t mean it and you knew he would be feeling way worse than needed.

He started mumbling apologies to you and to the baby. He eventually quieted and your thoughts replayed what just happened. You erupted into laughter and Kuroo sat up again. You started cackling so much tears were escaping. You tried to calm yourself down so you wouldn’t be shaking the baby too much. But Kuroo joined in on the laughter and it took a while for you guys to quiet up.

Eventually a calm took over the air again and you two were back to admiring your son. You felt so much joy and you almost started laughing again thinking about what Kuroo did. You spoke up and leaned your head closer to your baby, “Hey little, remember that thing I told you in the hospital. Maybe you don’t have to grow up to be exactly like your dad, hm? Less of a potty mouth perhaps.”

Kuroo’s chest rumbled in amusement. “Hey,” he chided. He lifted his son’s hand lightly, “Dada will do his best, okay buddy?” He turned to give you a smile and you felt flustered by how much love he looked at you with. “But I would not be opposed in the slightest if he turned out more like you. I think that would actually be really, really lovely.” He leaned toward you and placed a soft kiss on the cheek.

It was your turn to get emotional.

OIKAWA

You weren’t getting a lot of sleep with the new baby. You thought your pregnancy brain was bad but the sleep-deprived parent brain was working its way up to first place. One morning Oikawa wrapped his arms around you and told you to go take a nap. A long nap. Your head sank into his chest and you let out a deep breath. You pouted and looked up at him. Brushing his hair back you told him, “I can’t. I have to do the laundry, I have to make lunch, I need to give her a bath. I don’t think I have the time, love.”

He gently shook his head and tucked a piece of your hair behind your ear, “Make time. Laundry, lunch, baby. I got this. You need rest.”

Your heart swelled and your body wanted to immediately say yes to the proposal for sleep but you observed Tooru’s face. He wasn’t faring much better in the sleep department either. “Are you sure?” you asked him.

“Positive.”

You kissed him and made your way to your bed, sinking into sleep faster than you expected to. When you woke up you felt like a million bucks. Then your parental instincts went into high gear when you heard crying. You jumped out of bed but calmed down when your brain told you that it wasn’t your daughter. Then you recognized that the little sniffles were little Tooru sniffles. You found him in the baby’s nursery. He was rocking her around her room.

“Hey, handsome.”

“Oh hey sweetheart, you look refreshed,” he placed the baby into her crib.

“What’s wrong? You’re crying,” you say as you wrap your arms around him and look over at your little baby girl.

“I was just thinking. And I started crying,” he let out an embarrassed laugh.

“Well what were you thinking about?”

“One day she’s going to grow up.”

“Well we just have to cherish these moments then hm.” You gave him a tight squeeze before releasing him.

He turned to face you. He was pouting. “But Y/N, you don’t get it. She’s going to grow up and she’s going to be strikingly beautiful and intelligent like you and brilliant and hardworking like her daddy and then everyone at her school is going to flock to her but I already know she’ll be stubborn and she won’t want her amazingly kind and handsomely-aged dad to butt in. But someone’s gotta keep those crazy hormone-filled teens straight so then we’ll have to resort to asking Iwa-chan and then he’ll say ‘You owe me Shittykawa’ and then he’ll come and be an amazing uncle. He’s just going to show them that scowl and scare them off but then somehow one of them is going to weasel their way into her life and then they're going to confess and then they’ll start dating and then she’s going to get married. And she won’t be this tiny little baby anymore, oh Y/N I don’t know if I can take it. I’m not ready to walk her down the aisle.” He pulled you into a bear hug.

Your jaw dropped. These dramatic moments from Oikawa were few and far between since your highschool days and this was the most elaborate one in a while. You wanted to laugh but you wiggled your arms free so you could rub his back. You kept your hold on him until he lifted himself up. You brushed your fingers against his face and you wanted to frown looking at the dark circles under his eyes. He clearly needed a nice nap too. You ran your fingers through his hair. “If it makes you feel a bit better I don’t think she’s thinking about relationships at two months old.”

He cracked a smile, “She better not think about relationships until she’s thirty- no, forty.” It made you chuckle. He grabbed your hand and kissed the back of it. His smile was big now.

“Are you good?”

He nodded. “I made chicken.”

“What?” you giggled.

“For lunch,” he bent over the crib and gave your sleeping baby girl a kiss on the head and then made sure the baby monitor was on. Grabbing your hand he headed for the door, “Come on.”

“Okay but after lunch you are catching up on your sleep.”

TANAKA

Tanaka has always treated you like royalty, and pregnancy was no different. In fact it was probably even more extra during pregnancy. Will drive miles for the food you’re craving, give you massages, he did whatever he needed to make sure you were comfortable.

And now you two were in the hospital after your water broke. During the contractions, Tanaka gave you his hand to squeeze. And he kept encouraging you, giving you affirmations. After a particularly big contraction he smoothed your hair back. “You’re doing great, babe.”

“Thank you,” you gave him a smile.

He kissed you, “You look gorgeous.”

You laughed, “I look so gross right now, I feel so gross.”

“Well then you make being gross look really good.”

When it was time for you to start pushing Tanaka insisted you keep holding his hand. A big push came and you squeezed his hand tight. “Ow, babe that hurts, that hurts.”

The look of pure murder on your face when your head whipped to look at him as the baby was literally crowning out of your body.

His soul leaves the stratosphere. “You know what,” he puts his hand back into yours, “just break it.”

You grabbed it as the midwife told you to push again. As much pain as you were in you didn’t want to be mean to your husband one bit much less hurt him so you tried not to squeeze it too hard but something in your body told you to give an extra hard push and you couldn’t help it.

A small squeak escaped Tanaka before he crumpled onto the floor. You may have crushed his hand.

“Ryuu!” You tried to look over the bed at him but you were GIVING BIRTH.

“I’m okay, I’m okay. Keep going, beautiful. Baby Girl is almost here,” he groaned as he tried to pull himself back up.

#haikyuu #haikyuu headcanons #kuroo #oikawa #tanaka #kuroo x reader #oikawa x reader #tanaka x reader #kuroo tetsurou #oikawa tooru #tanaka ryuunosuke #i love you tetsu💛#tw pregnancy #☀tara writes☀

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wallwriterstuff · 3 years ago

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Pertaining to your post to the twins reactions to fire, how do you think their relationship is with the rest of the guard? Do you think they view Demitri and Felix as protectors or older brother type figures?

I think this answer changes based on which version of the twins your discussing really, though more for Alec than Jane. It turned a tad longer than I expected hahaha!

Canon Jane and Alec (13/14):

They are so very young still, impressionable, and highly traumatised by their human lives. For a long time they don't need anyone else, the guard are just a nuisance like that annoying fly that won't leave you alone. They expect them to leave, try to force them to even. It's safer when it's just the two of them after all. Except the guard don't leave, and despite his size Felix is actually very gentle and calm when Jane has a tantrum. Demetri's very patient to and becomes a constant presence in their lives. These two are the main people the twins will work with so getting them acclimatised to them is the most important thing.

Oddly, the distance the kings put between themselves and their guard actually helps Alec and Jane come round to them the most. It's quiet there and there's never any pressure to interact, so they can read or play chess or talk as they please and if Aro happens to have some input once or twice its okay, he'll leave them be again soon.

It's a very slow process but ultimately these two frightened and angry smol beans start seeking out those they know best when they want to explore or have been bothered enough by the other guard. In this scenario, canon Jane and Alec very much see the other guards as protectors. They not only saved them but they also trained them to be powerful and self-reliant. They can be trusted to solve problems, to be in their space. Though they may be old they are forever stuck as young teens, their more childish traits need to be tempered and after a few centuries Felix and Demetri have the power to do that.

Movie Alec and Jane (18ish):

Clearly, these twins are physically older and have had the chance to mature before their change. There's less of that childish need to seek out someone to help you and more of a drive to do things by yourself where you can. They don't need protectors now, they protect themselves and each other already and have had practice doing it, these twins just want friends. They never had any of those so again it takes a while.

This scenario is highly beneficial for Alec who never had many male role models in his life. He doesn't need to learn to shave anymore sure but having Felix and Demetri around is like having two older, annoying brothers. They will tease him to no end but if he asks for serious advice, they'll give it and no more needs be said about it. I really believe he's a curious bean and Demetri is very much the scholar, the pair get on well purely because of a shared love of academics and this is what built their friendship. Alec was technically already a man when he died so in the sad boi hours where the other two are reminiscing about their lost partners/families, Alec gets to chip in and wonder what he could have had.

Jane on the other hand...gets two more Alec's. Felix will crush anyone so much as looking at her funny and Demetri has a myriad of psychological tricks to make you realise you actually don't want to date her at all. She finds this infuriating and tells them so but Alec still quietly encourages them. They are confidants and allies where she never had them previously and Jane secretly adores the way Felix pats her head when he passes her in the hall, even if she pain drops him for it.

Her relationship with the female guard is somewhat strained. Heidi tries to use a shared love of makeup to connect with her but its only semi successful. Jane has spent so long with just Alec at her side she doesn't really know how to act with other women. The wives are the best company for her, because they aren't much for idle gossip given their prison cell doesn't let them go out hunting for it. Athenadora's battle stories are the best and Sulpicia helped her discover a talent for art she never knew she had. These evenings are quiet and suit her best.

#twilight #twilight asks #volturi #jane volturi #alec volturi

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mshermia · 4 years ago

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A Dream Or A Nightmare

By @mshermia for @blackchessknight

Rating: Teen & Up

Relationships: Peter Parker & Tony Stark

Characters: Tony Stark, Peter Parker, Natasha Romanoff, Helen Cho, Steve Rogers, Ned Leeds

Summary: Peter gets hurt during a mission. When he wakes up, it dawns on Tony that Peter doesn't remember a few things; he didn’t just forget about Tony but also being Spider-Man. While Peter thinks he's living his teenage dream spending time with the freaking Avengers, Tony is petrified he might never get the kid back who remembered being his son.

Many thanks to @friendly-neighborhood-exchange for all their work on this! This story is part of the Friendly Neighborhood Exchange #4.

AO3 Link

There were post-mission problems - like when Tony had to iron out the kinks in his suit - no pun intended-and had to pick up the bill for the remodel of a skyscraper - but then there were post-mission problems - like when his kid was passed out in a hospital bed, both his legs and one arm in a full cast.

Like right now.

It had been a few hours since they had patched him up, but so far, there was no sign of consciousness in Peter. Cho had reiterated once or twice that his body simply needed the rest and Tony would just have to be a little patient for his healing factor to pick up the pieces. It would take a little time and a lot of energy and Tony would just have to sit there and let Peter's body do its job.

Which was just great. Really. Just awesome, because patience, well, patience was one of Tony's core qualities. He was great at it. Top tier.

With a groan, he buried his face in both of his hands. They were at 8 hours and 47 minutes now. 8 hours and 47 minutes since Cho had rolled Peter out of the treatment room, her face solemn but not unkind.

"Just go lie down, Tony," she had said. "It'll be a few hours before he wakes up. Just get some rest."

Like that line had ever worked on him. Like he had ever left Peter's side after a mission before. No, even if the thought of May's ghost coming back and haunting his ass for leaving Peter would have had its perks, he'd made a promise and meant to keep it. The kid was it for him. His responsibility. His job. Out of all of them, by far Tony's favorite job. His life, really.

There was no version of this where he would move from Peter's side.

The idea of sleep at this point was a farce. Whenever Tony even attempted to close his eyes, the memories of that afternoon washed back up. No matter how deep he tried to bury them, they just wouldn't stay covered. He could still see it, the force with which Peter had been smashed into the building. Could still hear the white noise of his racing heart as he had desperately tried to move the debris under which Peter had been buried. He didn't need the nightmares that were waiting for him to just give in, to rest and sleep. No, when Peter would wake up that was when he'd even start to think about getting some rest.

With all his determination - and the frequency that Tony had spent time next to Peter in the med wing over the last year or so - you'd think he might have invested in a few more comfortable chairs but there was something about him being in discomfort that made waiting for his kid to wake up a little more bearable. Only this time, it took a little too long. This time it wasn't just Tony's back that was strained and his legs that were cramping. His nerves were on edge. 8 hours and - now - 48 minutes.

It felt like it was a little too long. He couldn't remember Peter ever being out cold this long before.

It took another 2 hours and 21 minutes until - thank the gods, all of them - Peter's eyelids fluttered. Slowly at first, confused and dazed until he squinted to the side, looking right at Tony.

"Good morning, sunshine," Tony greeted him, the smile on his lips entirely genuine.

For what felt like an unusually long moment, Peter simply looked at him like he didn't really see him. Like Tony was part of the wallpaper rather than sitting there, leaning in closer. The poor little buddy was still all punch-drunk, a little lost even.

"How's your head, kid?"

Peter blinked a couple of times, his eyes growing a little rounder, definitely wider, but his gaze never left Tony's face. "You... You're Tony Stark."

Panic flashed through Tony faster than lightning, goosebumps rising on his arm. Was he... did he not remember?

Peter's eyes on the other hand grew a little wider if that was even possible. "OMG, Iron Man... you're Iron Man." The corners of his mouth pulled into a wide smile.

That little prankster... Tony huffed out a breath, one hand clutching his heart. "Jeezes kid, you almost had me." Adrenaline was still pulsed through him but he couldn't help but laugh. It wasn't often, that Peter's pranks worked on him.

"H-had you?" The smile on Peter's lips faltered just as his brow furrowed. "Oh... oh, what the..." He pressed his eyes shut. Fingers and thumb of his right hand - the one left cast-free - rubbed across his temples.

As fast as Tony's cramping legs allowed, he rushed forward, one hand on the back of Peter's head, the other on the side of his face. "It's okay..." With practiced ease, his fingers ran through Peter's hair, tracing back and forth across his skull with just enough pressure that it should help ease the pain.

Little by little, Peter's heavy breathing slowed, the tension on his face slowly ebbing away.

"FRI, let's tilt up that headrest a bit." As the bed was moving Peter into more of an upright position, Tony tried to catch his eye. "That better?"

When their eyes met, he couldn't help but flinch at the look of utter confusion on Peter's face. "Y-yeah," he mumbled, never looking away from Tony.

"Where else does it hurt?" Tony's fingers were still rubbing back and forth through Peter's soft locks, the pressure low just like Tony knew May used to do for him. Like he had done so many times ever since it had been just the two of them.

"I... I'm not..." He couldn't seem to find the words. "What happened?"

Tony tried to swallow the rising panic attack that was brewing just below his skin. "You don't remember?"

Just then, the door edged open. Natasha stuck her head into the room. "Well, look who's back amongst the living!" She smiled warmly as she stepped in.

Peter's face on the other hand went a little paler. "It's... it's the Widow," he mumbled to himself, then sucked in a shaky breath. "Black Widow and Iron Man. Black Widow and Iron Man. This is... this is... wow."

Nat glanced over at Tony, her eyebrows slowly rising. "Uh-oh... that doesn't sound good."

Tony swallowed hard. "FRI, can you get Helen for us? Fast."

"Right away, boss."

Peter's eyes blinked up to the ceiling. "Shit, that's so cool."

"Hey, buddy..." Tony's hand on the back of his head gave it a soft squeeze, just enough to get his attention back. "Pain level? On a scale of 1 to 10, where're we at?"

"Erm..." He wasn't even blinking, just staring at Tony.

"1 is stubbing your toe, 10 is Toomes dropping a building on you." His heart was racing but this was absolutely not the time for Tony to have a panic attack.

"A... a building," Peter asked, dumbfounded.

"Fuck." Tony's hands were starting to sweat.

A glance at Natasha didn't help his nerves at all. A deep frown and an unambiguous sense of worry had replaced the cool facade she usually displayed.

Once again, the door to the room was pushed open. Helen Cho was on the other side of Peter's bed before Tony had even blown out a deep sigh of relief. With Helen, Peter was in good hands, the best hands.

"Hi there, Peter." Helen smiled down at him before her eyes moved back to the monitor displaying his vitals. "It's good to see you up."

"Er... hello."

"His memory," Tony spluttered. "Please, do something!"

"Alright, relax..." Natasha stepped up next to him, her hands on his arms pulling him away from Peter. "Give her some room to work."

"It's okay. I got him, Tony." Helen gave him a smile that was surely meant to look encouraging. It was everything but that though. It resembled the one that she had given him right after the last time Tony had needed a long-ass session in the cradle, resembled it a little too closely for Tony's liking. Her smile turned a little warmer when she looked back at Peter. "Do you know who I am, dear?"

"You..." Peter blinked a few times, his cheeks turning pink. "You're the doctor? M-my doctor?"

"My name is Helen."

"Oh, right..." Peter gave a swift smile. "He-hello Doctor Helen."

"Do you know who this is?" She pointed at Tony.

The nervous little laugh that bubbled out of Peter would have been cute in any other circumstance. "That... that's Tony Stark," he whispered, repeatedly glancing at Tony, then added "Iron Man" just as quietly and with just as much awe.

Helen's smile didn't falter though. "Do you remember when you met Tony for the first time?"

"Er... well, yeah actually, it..." He rubbed a hand through his hair, eyes now on the sheets. "When I was... er... when I was 8. He..." The color on Peter's cheeks turned a little darker. "well, we didn't like meet-meet but kind of... met at the Expo. He... he helped me. Erm... blasted one of those Hammer drones away that... that was right in front of me."

Helen stole a glance in his direction but Tony could only shake his head. He had no idea what Peter was talking about.

"Okay, what is the last thing you remember doing?"

Peter opened his mouth, then frowned. "I... er..." For a moment he just sat there, blinking at her, mouth still open. "I... I don't know."

"Alright. That's okay. Look at me for a moment." She leaned towards him, a little flashlight in her hand. "Do you know what day it is?"

"Er..." He struggled to keep his eyes open as Helen moved the light from one eye to the other.

She studied him closely, her frown deepening. "What year?"

Peter didn't even try for an answer this time. His face fell a little with every passing moment, panic steadily replacing the awestruck expression on his face. "I don't... I don't know. I don't know!"

"It's alright," Helen soothed, patting his shoulder.

With wide eyes, Peter turned to Tony like he had all the answers but he was completely useless, struggling to even think of how to start fixing this. "What's happening, Helen? What... what do I need to do? Talk to me!"

"Okay, let's just... let's just stay calm." Natasha took another step forward, positioning herself between Tony and Peter's bed. "Tony, I'm looking at you."

His eyes shot up at her but the loud drum of his heart thundering in his ears made his head hurt.

"Right," he breathed.

"Listen, this, er..." Peter's voice was quiet, close to shaking. "Thank you, you know, but I... I should really call my aunt and uncle. They... they're probably worried and I don't want them to have to worry because if they worry then I worry and I—"

"Alright, just..." Tony's heart was racing. "We'll... we'll figure that out, okay?"

It took all the strength he had not to go running from that room. If his nerves had been rising before it was no contest to the adrenaline that was now pumping through Tony's veins.

Peter didn't remember. Ben and May Parker were dead and the kid didn't remember.

Instead, he was staring at Tony, eyes wide in starstruck wonder. "Oh, okay," he nodded, cheeks burning. "Thank you, Mr. Stark."

Before Tony could even think about how he was supposed to deal with telling Peter the truth, once again, the door to his room was pushed open. This time it was Rogers, positively humming with his never-fading good spirits.

"Hi there, Peter." Steve cringed as he took in the casts on both his legs and arms, then winked. "You look a little tied up there."

"Captain America... Captain America knows my name," Peter mumbled as if to himself, eyes wide in awe.

Eyebrows raised, Steve's glance shifted to Helen, then Tony. "Yikes."

The room was getting too crowded, giving Tony a fresh vibe of claustrophobia. Like she could smell it on him, Natasha grabbed him by the arm.

"Maybe you should discuss the details of the situation with Helen in her office, hm?" 'Or anywhere but in this room' - was what her eyes were saying instead.

"No," Tony mumbled. "I can't— I won't—"

"Nat and I will keep Peter here some company," Steve chimed in before flashing a toothy smile at Peter. "Sound good, kid?"

Mouth a little gaping, Peter nodded slowly.

"Nat can tell you about the time she went to Kalkutta and tried to outsmart Bruce Banner," he smiled even wider. "That sound good to you?"

"Really... er... really good," Peter mumbled.

The idea of leaving Peter had Tony's anxiety spike but not as much as the thought of having to tell him about his uncle's murder and his aunt's illness. He didn't resist, letting his feet fall in front of each other one step at a time as Helen tugged him by the arm.

"We'll figure this out, Tony," she said after she closed the door behind them. "Just take a breath."

"I'll take a breath when I know he'll be okay," Tony hissed through his teeth. "What is going on? You said you did a scan! You said he'd be fine!"

She held up her hands like it was going to calm him. Like he was a fucking horse that got a little spooked.

"I'll have to run some more tests but with how you described his crash, it is likely that he suffered a traumatic brain injury which affects the memory-storage areas of his brain, which is why we originally did the first scan when you brought him in."

Goosebumps erupted on his skin and had him shiver in reaction. "He's got amnesia."

"Right," Helen nodded. "We'll have to monitor him to figure out how much of his memory he has lost and if it's limited to a retrograde amnesia or also impairs his ability to form new memories."

"Jeezes." His face buried in both his hands, Tony had trouble focusing on one coherent thought himself. He swallowed hard, eyes back on Helen. "Well, when are his memories going to be back?"

Helen's face was somber. "It's something we will have to reevaluate step by step."

"But..." Panic, worse than before, was making his heart race. "But he is going to get his memories back, right?"

"I don't know, Tony." Her sympathetic frown was not helping with his panic at all.

"Well, what do you know?!"

"Hey..." The door to Peter's room had opened and closed. Steve was next to him in a matter of moments. "You need to keep it down out here." One of his hands was on Tony's shoulder and led him further down the hallway as his head bowed towards him. "We'll figure this out, Tony. Just breathe, okay?"

It was easier said than done. Tony's lungs were reluctant to work. With every frantic beat of his heart, panic seemed to vibe in his core a little stronger.

His focus was still on Helen. "There has to be something we can do, just... just tell me what I have to do!"

"I'm sorry, Tony, there is just too little that we know. With his healing factor, the injury to his brain might have been more severe than we could detect by the time you brought him to the Compound. It's possible that his body had already started the healing process and what we see now are the lingering symptoms from the injury."

"He can't... he can't even remember his aunt and uncle dying! What..." Tony tangled both hands in his hair, pulling hard like the pain of it would ease the agony of his racing mind. "What am I supposed to tell him?"

"It's a difficult situation," Helen said, entirely unhelpful.

No longer able to keep his feet still, Tony moved away from her, back towards the door of Peter's room only to remember that behind lay his kid that didn't remember ever really meeting him. Didn't remember the months of agony after May's death they had overcome together. Tony couldn't do that again. He wouldn't be able to bear it, to see the kid hurting like that again, not now when Peter had finally managed to brave the heartache of his loss.

Tony turned away from the door to stalk down the corridor, running as far away as his trembling legs would let him, only to be stopped by Steve.

"Just sit down for a moment, okay?"

Tony shook his head. He couldn't sit. He couldn't keep the panic at bay any longer. He was going to combust.

But instead, two strong hands pressed down on his shoulders and he found himself sat in one of the chairs that lined the med wing's hallway. As fast as his knees gave way, so did his emotions finally bubble out of him. His face hidden behind both his hands, Tony tried to cover up the tears, his unsteady breathing as his anxiety got the better of him. Steve's hand that lay heavy around his shoulders actually didn't hurt. It grounded him just enough to cling to some of his composure.

"You should get some sleep," Steve mumbled. "He's not gonna be awake for long anyway with his body still healing. Just... lie down and rest and—"

"No," Tony croaked. Steve's arm slid away as Tony sat up straight again. "I'm not going anywhere." Repeatedly, he rubbed the sleeve of his sweatshirt across his face. "I'm all the family he has left. Just me and—"

Right, there was one more person that was like family to Peter, like a brother.

"FRI!" Tony's eyes flickered up to the ceiling. "Get Happy to pick up Ned Leeds. Tell him to hurry."

For an hour and a half, Tony allowed Steve to distract him in the communal kitchen. He ate some of Sam's lasagne, snuck about 4 cups of espresso until FRIDAY finally announced the arrival of Ned and Happy.

It wasn't Ned's first visit to the Compound. Even though Tony and Peter usually lived at the Tower, he had taken the boys out to the Avengers complex upstate for a number of weekend trips. It got Peter's mind off his worries and the awestruck look on Ned's face was always a picture.

This was likely the first time that Ned refrained from gawking at the high ceiling of the lobby, his eyes on Tony.

"Let's go," Tony mumbled, dipping his head toward the med wing.

Ned didn't hesitate, his tension visible in his clenched fists. "What happened?"

Tony gritted his teeth, pushing the memory back down that wanted to send him spiraling once again. "He got thrown against a building and that hard skull of his brought down the whole thing on top of him."

Ned blew out a shaky breath. "But he's awake?"

"Yeah, only can't remember m-much." Tony had just about stopped himself from a 'remember me' slipping off his tongue.

Ned glanced at him. "And you think me being here will help?"

"He doesn't remember that May and Ben are dead. I think maybe... maybe a friendly face will help. Even if it doesn't trigger anything. Just to..." Tony sucked in a sharp breath, "to soften the blow."

Ned cursed then his head turned back to Tony. "Wait, but..." He shook his head. "He still knows who you are, right?"

Avoiding Ned's face, he tried really hard to keep the emotion out of his voice. "He remembers Iron Man."

Before Ned could say another word, Tony pushed open the door to Peter's room. Natasha was still sitting next to his bed but quickly receded to the back wall as Peter's enthusiastic voice echoed through the room!

"Ned! You're here!" Awkwardly with his legs and one arm a little elevated in their casts, Peter waved at him with his good hand. "Hi there, Mr. Stark," he added, his cheeks once again blushing profusely.

"Shit, dude, your legs!"

A little hesitant, Ned moved closer to the bed. But when Peter stretched out his hand, ready to greet him with their signature handshake, the tension in Ned's shoulders lifted.

"I know right? It's sick!" Then he shrugged. "At least it should get me out of PE."

"For a little while at least."

Helen had made her way back into the room right after them. She placed a hand on Tony's upped arm, squeezing it reassuringly. This is where they were supposed to start. Talk about Peter's physical recovery before they headed down the dark winding road of his amnesia.

"When you've eaten, we'll have to get a couple more scans in but right now," she continued. "But right now I see no reason why it should take you longer than the normal ten days for multiple broken limbs until the casts can come off."

"Ten days? What," Peter snorted. "What kind of doctor are you?"

"Dude..." Ned's eyes were wide, as he glanced over at Helen.

"I... I'm sorry! So sorry," Peter's face turned beet-root-red. "I just... last time I broke my arm it... it took like seven months till the cast came off. Re-remember, Ned? I...I couldn't even play with your new playstation all summer!"

It didn't come as a real surprise to Tony, not at this point. He didn't remember being Spider-Man. Tony had feared as much since Ben Parker had died a few weeks after Peter's bite.

"Yeah, but..." Ned looked right at Peter. "But that was before."

"Before?" Peter frowned at him, then shook his head. "Before what?"

Both Ned and Helen turned to Tony, waiting expectantly for him to say something but Tony couldn't find the words. He didn't know where to begin. Before panic could take hold of his body and soul once more, it was Natasha who stepped up.

"Before you got your powers," she said like she was talking about yesterday's weather.

Slowly, Peter's eyes shifted from person to person before he glanced back at Nat. "My powers?"

"Yes, that was before you were bitten by a radioactive spider and developed superhuman strength and healing abilities." She tilted her head a little, studying him like this was the key that would bring back the kid's memory. "You also stick to things. Like walls."

"Radioactive spider?" Peter's eyebrows slowly rose closer and closer to his hairline. "And I stick to things." After another glance at Ned who nodded enthusiastically, Peter bit his lip. "So, I have superpowers. And I guess... I guess being here with you..." there was another pause while he gnawed at his lip a little harder. "I guess that means I use those powers to like help you?"

She narrowed her eyes at him. "Correct."

The corners of Peter's mouth twitched. It was painfully obvious how he tried to suppress a wide smirk. "Can you imagine?" He turned to Ned. "May finding out I'm a superhero? She'd lose her mind."

"Er... Peter..." Ned's face was long and a little spooked.

"What?" Peter mumbled, the smile falling off his lips. He looked from one person to the next waiting for someone to offer up more information.

Tony's chest was tight but there was no way around it. This was his responsibility. He would have to be the one and he'd catch Peter once again when he would crumble under the news.

"Peter, I'm afraid your aunt and your uncle, they are no longer with us." Tony did his best to keep his voice clear, his tone sincere. He edged a little closer to Peter's bed then sat done at the foot end of it, ready to pull him close. "Ben died a little more than 2 years ago. May a year later."

"Oh." For a moment, Peter's face was blank, then he grimaced. "Damn, that's a little harsh, killing off the family to hang out with the freaking Avengers. Your brain's messed up, Parker," he mumbled under his breath. "I'm gonna have to bake them a cake."

"Pete..." Tony frowned and reached his hand out, not quite finding the confidence to take Peter's hand, he awkwardly squeezed the side of his bed instead. "I'm really sorry."

"Yeah, no, right..." Quickly, Peter nodded, his eyes on the hand Tony had edged towards him. "Me too. Me too. That's... that's not cool. I mean like... like bad."

Dread was crawling up Tony's spine.

"So then," Peter cleared his throat. "I guess I'm not staying in the apartment anymore or did I..." He squinted at Natasha like she was the best source of good information. "Did I get a job?"

"No," Ned shook his head, a subtle sense of irritation swinging in his voice. "You live with Tony."

"With Tony?" Peter followed Ned's finger that was pointing straight at Tony's chest. "I'm living with Tony." His hand flew up to cover his mouth a little too late to cover the snort he hadn't been able to hold back. "Sorry, of course I do..." Peter mumbled through his hand as Ned turned around looking right at Tony, his face full of shock.

All Tony could do was sit there. This was worse than he would have thought. This was a whole different level of denial.

"I'm sorry," Peter mumbled again then pointed at Ned, "you'll get such a kick out of this." The hand now rubbing across his face, he shook his head and mumbled, "God, I hope, I'll remember this when I wake up."

Tony's heart sank. It sank all the way to his stomach where it lay like a heavy undigestible piece of useless flesh. Which was worse, Peter's refusal to believe the painful truth or that the idea of him living with Tony was such a joke? A sense of bottomless sorrow washed over him unbroken as Natasha pulled him out of the room by his arm.

"He'll get there," she mumbled, squeezing both his shoulders. "It's a lot to take in all at once but there is no way around it."

"I... I don't know how to do this," Tony whispered.

"We're here with you." One of her hands forced his chin up, forced him to look at her through his tears. "We're right here with you. Every step of the way, okay?"

###

Of course, I couldn't resist making this a longer story, so there'll be a second chapter (probably) tomorrow ;)

#irondad #IRON DAD AND SPIDER SON #amnesia #friendly neighborhood exchange #spiderman fanfiction #tony stark fic #tony stark #iron dad fic #spiderman

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drivingbatty · 4 years ago

Text

― rory keaner fluff alphabet

i know this is sorta random but what can I say? I love this batty boi💗. I'll probably be doing this with everyone else too! gifs by @bodhirookes

➥

A ctivities - What do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them?

One thing that is certain about Rory is that he’s not the best at saying “no”. So he’s up for whatever you are! Even though he can get a bit antsy he won’t mind spending a quiet day with you and he won’t mind running around town causing mayhem. He’s very neutral is what I’m saying. If he had to pick a favorite though, he loves it when you let him take you flying! He thinks it romantic.

B eauty - What do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?

He admires your kindness and patience. Most people (aside from the Gang) would immediately snap at him for bothering them or asking a ”dumb question” but you answer them without much hesitation or annoyance. And he loves you for that

If we're talking physically, he absolutely loves your smile. Just knowing that his favorite person in the whole world is happy makes him 10x as happy! And he makes sure to let you know that. When you’re sad he’ll poke your face or do something stupid to get you to smile.

C omfort - How would they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack etc.?

He's not the best with words so he'll try to cheer you up the best can. Just tell him what you need, and he’s got you. Snacks? He’s already back in 5 seconds with your favorites. More tissues? Bam, he’s brought you a baker’s dozen of boxes because he didn’t know what brand to get. Cuddles? Hell yeah!

D reams - How do they picture their future with their s/o?

He doesn't have any plans, he just hopes that you two will be together until the day you die. Rory’s an “in the moment” thinker and he plans on being in this teenage honeymoon stage forever. He might turn you though, but only if you're okay with it.

E qual - Are they the dominant one in the relationship, or rather passive?

He likes to believe he's the man in the relationship as most teen boys would, but he's hella soft and if you so much as look disapprovingly at him he'll shut up pretty quickly. So yeah, he's pretty passive.

F ight - Would they be easy to forgive their s/o? How are they fighting?

Rory is not very good at holding grudges. So he's very quick to forgive you whenever you have a disagreement, which rarely happens since he's pretty hard to upset. If things ever somehow managed to escalate he'd stay quiet until your done talking to apologize and change the subject. He really hates arguing and wants it to be over as soon as possible.

G ratitude - How grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their s/o is doing for them?

He thinks about how lucky he is everyday and will never take anything for granted. He's not used to receiving attention (physical or otherwise) so he'll dwell on even the smallest things forever. He just can't believe that you are interested in him.

H onesty - Do they have secrets they hide from their s/o? Or do they share everything?

He might hide his vampire-ism for awhile due to Ethan and Benny, since apparently not everyone finds being with an undead creature of the night appealing. Aside from that he's an open book! He has a tendency to ramble so there will be virtually no secrets between you two.

I nspiration - Did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? Like trying out new things or helped them overcome personal problems?

Congrats, you've just made him even more clingy! Now he's physically incapable of being alone for too long and will seek you out because he misses you :( even if its been like 10 minutes

J ealousy - Do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it?

Rory doesn't get jealous due to his issues with social cues so he won't overthink any interactions you and someone else may be having. But on the off chance that he does get jealous he'll just get really pouty and try to drag you to do something else.

K iss - Are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like?

Rory is pretty inexperienced in the smooching department but he tries his best. His kisses are kinda stiff at first but the more comfortable he gets the warmer they are and the more he seeks them out. Surprise kisses are his personal favorite. He also loves doing the exaggerated 'mwah' sound too, the goof.

L ove Confession - How would they confess to their s/o?

Being the wannabe Casanova he is, I feel like he asked you out a million times before you actually said yes. The time you said yes he actually tried to ditch the pick up lines and be sincere about it. I mean, how could you say no that face?

M arriage - Do they want to get married? How do they propose? What would the marriage be like?

Eh, he's thought about it. Again he's never really been known to think ahead so it probably doesn't cross his mind all too often. But if he was asked he'd most likely say yes since "That's what people usually do, right?"

N icknames - What do they call their s/o?

Literally every single one in the book. He's also pretty creative if "spice angel" and "blonde hottie mclovely" is anything to go off of. So you have an endless supply of petnames coming your way. His favorites are probably sweetcheeks, angel face, gum drop, fruit cake, and ragamuffin. He's very corny.

O n Cloud Nine - What are they like when they are in love? Is it obvious for others? How do they express their feelings?

You're all he will talk about. Ethan and Benny will be tired of it pretty soon. He'll also become more susceptible to his floating quirk whenever you so much as look at him. His head's in the clouds and his heart is full. Impressing you will become a main priority and he will not leave you alone. He's basically a lovesick puppy that follows you around.

P DA - Are they upfront about their relationship? Do they brag with their s/o in front of others? Or are they rather shy to kiss etc. when others are watching?

Rory is very upfront about it. He's always bragging about you to everyone in the vicinity and he will be damned if someone won't hear about you atleast 5 times that day. He wants people to be jealous. And they should be! He gets to date you and they can't! The poor fools.

As for physical attention, he might be kinda shy to it at first. He's a teen boy and while things like that are exciting, he's also scared of embarrassing himself. So he mostly held your hand everywhere and refused to let go. But once he gets comfortable expect everything to be going your way. Pecks on the mouth, cheek, hugging, hand holding, the whole works! Though he won't do anything to risque like making out or anything.

Q uirk - Some random ability they have that’s beneficial in a relationship.

Oddly enough, Rory is pretty good at reading your face. Or maybe he just worries about you alot. All you know is that any minute that you're not beaming with joy he's already asking what's wrong and if he can help. He just really doesn't want to see you upset so he'll make sure to check up on you when he can.

R omance - How romantic are they? What would they do to make their s/o happy? Cliché or rather creative?

All Rory knows about romance are loads of cliches he's seen. He use to play up how bad alot of them were before he was with you, but now? Ho boy, they are his only language. Getting you gifts, saying weird lines, attempting to get dressed up for dates, and getting flowers (he'll do this no matter what gender you are and you can't tell me otherwise). Though he fumbles in the "smooth" part of the romantic gestures, he's really trying.

S upport - Are they helping their s/o achieve their goals? Do they believe in them?

He believes in you so much its insane! He's literally your biggest fan when it comes to anything.

"You got a test coming up and you're worried about passing? There's no need, babe! You're a genius!"

"You're doing a certain extra curricular or club? Everyone is gonna be jealous of your greatnes. They can't compete!"

Hell, he'll even encourage you in things that sound absolutely terrible.

"Wanna try and eat 5 whole tacos in 1 minute? I'll go set the timer!"

T hrill - Do they need to try out new things to spice out your relationship? Or do they prefer a certain routine?

Being with him is honestly a series of surprises. You never know what you're in for whenever you two meet up. Sometimes you might even get pulled into whatever The Gang™️ want to solve. But you guys have one routine of always having a movie night on Fridays. Cuddling and snack binging ensue.

U nderstanding - How good do they know their partner? Are they empathetic?

Even though he's scatter-brained he actually has a pretty great memory, especially when it comes to you. He notices a lot of your ticks due to almost always being around you somehow.

Rory doesn't always get social cues, so some things may fly over his head. But once he understands the situation he totally has your back.

V alue - How important is the relationship to them? What is it’s worth in comparison to other things in their life?

Rory doesn't have . . . a lot of priorities. He has his friends, his mom, and virtually nothing else. So you're pretty high on his list of important things! If he could, he would most likely die for you (although possibly by accident).

W ild Card - A random Fluff Headcanon.

He always visits you in the morning. Since vampires don't need to sleep he's usually already there before you wake up. And he'll be super annoying while trying to wake you up too. Then after you get ready you both go to school together, either by flight or just walking.

X OXO - Are they very affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddle?

Definitely! As I said before, PDA isn't a big problem for him and he's still just as affectionate in private. I'd have to say he prefers kissing but he's honestly up to anything when it comes to you.

Y earning - How will they cope when they’re missing their partner?

He can do pretty fine on his own at first, but he gets pretty bummed after a while. But like, its not like he can't see you. This man got all the way to FLORIDA I doubt he'll let a little bit of distance get in the way of you two.

Z eal - Are they willing to go to great lenghts for the relationship? If so, what kind of?

Again, he would die for you. He'd even commit a felony for you if he had to! Honestly you might need to teach him that he has a choice and that he doesn't have to do everything for you.

🦇

#baby boy. baby.#hes pure fluff and he needs👏more👏content #gonna try and do this with everyone else :)#my babysitter's a vampire #my babysitters a vampire #my babysitters a vampire x reader #rory keaner #rory keaner x reader #fluff alphabet

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mikauzoran · 4 years ago

Text

Lukadrien: Your Hands Hold Home: Chapter Twenty-One

@lukadrien-june

Read it on AO3: Your Hands Hold Home: Chapter Twenty-One: Heartbreak

Adrien hadn’t intended to eavesdrop.

His only aim in coming above deck was to ask Luka what he wanted to make for dinner, since it was their turn to cook for the family.

In the upstairs living room, he found Luka and Xavier-Yves, curled up conspiratorially on the couch and looking like they were having a serious discussion.

Not wanting to interrupt, Adrien turned to go, but, just then, he caught XY saying, “I wrote a song about you”. Adrien froze, interest piqued.

“Er…actually, about us. Our relationship,” XY revised sheepishly. “Would you wanna hear it?”

Adrien certainly did.

He mentally kicked himself for never thinking to serenade Luka before as he began to fret over what his love rival had come up with.

“You wrote a song about us?” Luka chuckled, wide-eyed with delight and looking thoroughly touched at XY’s romantic gesture. “That’s so awesome, Xavier-Yves. Of course I want to hear it.”

XY perked up, a goofy grin spreading across his face. “Yeah?”

Luka nodded. “Yeah.”

That was all the encouragement Xavier-Yves needed. He whipped out his laptop and cued up the song.

Adrien hadn’t listened to XY’s music much over the years. Chloé had a fondness for it, so he’d heard some when he was in his early teens, but after XY and Bob Roth’s stunt of stealing Kitty Section’s song, Adrien had made a point to avoid XY’s music when at all possible.

The song Xavier-Yves played for Luka now didn’t really resemble what Adrien remembered. It was still electronic, synthesized music, but it was nothing like the brain-rotting drivel Adrien had listened to with Chloé five years previously.

It was still repetitive, but instead of being relentless and grating, it put Adrien more in mind of the work of Philip Glass. There was a point to the repetition. It grew and changed subtly, building on what had come before and evolving with each layer XY added.

It was amazing to witness how transformed XY’s music was from what Adrien had heard previously, and the debt Xavier-Yves owed to Luka’s influence was obvious. With Luka’s guidance, XY’s music had become complex and sophisticated even.

The song started with a tense passage in the strings with percussion striking like thunder and flutes playing slippery, serpentine melodies reminiscent of lightning fliting across the sky.

“This is when we first met,” XY narrated, nervously watching Luka’s face, tracking his reactions.

The storm in the music quickly abated and took on a bouncing quality as a new theme was introduced.

“And this is us becoming friends,” Xavier-Yves informed, chewing on the inside of his cheek.

The passage kind of reminded Adrien of the chorus of Sweet’s Fox on the Run. It was an odd shift, but XY’s song was filled with weird juxtapositions of genres and styles like that that somehow managed to blend together and work to tell the story XY wanted.

Adrien tensed as an electric violin played a leitmotif that sounded exactly like Luka’s laugh.

Luka recognized it too and, caught off guard, started to laugh, only highlighting how exactly XY had captured the sound in his song.

“That’s brilliant, Prune. You got it just right,” Luka praised, clapping XY on the back.

Adrien tried to quell the spike of jealousy that shot through him, but it was so hard to fight the negative feelings when it felt like XY’s success was at Adrien’s expense.

The melody gradually morphed again, slowing down and taking on an achingly vulnerable pining quality.

A light crease developed between Luka’s brows as he struggled to place the emotion in the music and then tie it to something in his relationship with XY.

Adrien recognized the emotion right away, though. It was soul-baring longing so raw and honest that Adrien couldn’t help but be moved by it.

He wished he could be so honest with Luka about his own feelings.

Before Luka could puzzle out what that part of the song meant, the music changed again.

A shimmering, breathtaking piano solo emerged from the pining theme and took off at a run, its heart so full of hope that it brought tears to Adrien’s eyes.

The melody broke free and soared triumphantly until it disappeared over the horizon, sparkling out of existence with a graceful flourish.

Luka was left speechless as a single tear trickled down his cheek.

XY smiled tentatively. “…So…what did you think?”

“Xavier-Yves…” Luka breathed, “…that was truly beautiful.”

XY’s hesitant smile bloomed into a wide grin of pride and delight. “Yeah? You thought so?”

Luka nodded emphatically. “I loved it. I just… What was…what was that last part? What came after the part about us becoming friends? I’m not sure if I…”

He bit his lip, trailing off as he searched XY’s face.

Xavier-Yves’s grin softened, and a warm look came into his eyes. “That was me falling in love with you.”

Luka’s breath caught in his throat.

“I really like you, you know?” XY explained, reaching up to cup Luka’s cheek.

Adrien willed his feet to move and his voice to come unglued from where it was stuck in his throat, but he found himself mute and fixed in place like a decorative sculpture.

“People don’t really treat me so good,” XY elaborated earnestly. “I mean, I know I’m kind of dumb and obnoxious, but…but you’ve always been kind and patient.”

“Xavier-Yves…” Luka whispered, still dazed at this revelation and trying to sort out everything he was feeling.

“You believed in me and told me I could amount to something when my dad said I was useless and stupid and talentless,” XY stressed passionately. “You made me think there was something good about me after all…so I don’t think it’s weird, me falling in love with you.”

Luka’s eyes zeroed in on Xavier-Yves’s lips as their faces slowly drew nearer and nearer.

Adrien watched as Luka’s eyes slipped shut and he closed the distance between them.

Adrien felt something crack inside of his chest. It was a lot like being impaled.

Silently, he backed away and slipped back below deck. He made a beeline for his cabin, deaf to Plagg’s attempts at comfort as he buried his face in his pillow and sobbed.

It had been hard enough to accept that there was no future for him and Marinette. Being star-crossed a second time felt too cruel. He didn’t think he had it in him to put himself back together and fall in love a third time.

His shattered heart couldn’t take it.

Luka was just about to deepen the kiss when his brain caught up with his body.

He pulled back with a gasp.

“Sorry. Did I do something wrong? I’ve never done this before,” Xavier-Yves hastily rushed to explain.

Luka shook his head, mentally cursing himself for screwing everything up. “No. No, you’re a great kisser. That was awesome. I just…”

He winced. “I’m sorry. I can’t do this. There’s a part of me that wants to. I mean, I really do like you, but… It’s complicated,” Luka finished with a groan, looking up, ashamed, at XY, his eyes pleading for forgiveness. “I think we should just stay friends. I’m sorry.”

A wry smile curled up the corners of XY’s mouth. “Because of Adrien?”

Luka’s whole face went red, but he forced himself to look Xavier-Yves in the eyes as he nodded. “Not for the reason you think, though.”

XY quirked an eyebrow, settling back against the couch cushions. “Oh, yeah? Are you going to try to tell me that you’re not in love with him? Because, if you’re gonna turn me down, Six Strings, I’d like you to be honest about it.”

Luka’s face scrunched up in a grimace. “No. I wasn’t going to lie. I do have feelings for Adrien. I have for a long time, and, I mean…I do get the sense that he might be starting to reciprocate at least a little, but that’s not the reason I’m saying no to you. I’m not picking him over you. It’s not like that.”

XY nodded, seeing that Luka truly believed what he was saying. “Okay. So? What is it like?”

“Adrien’s been kind of rough lately with everything that’s happened. He’s in no shape to be in a relationship anyway, even if I did tell him how I feel and he felt the same,” Luka explained. “Adrien doesn’t have a whole lot of people he feels like he can count on in his life, so I really need to focus on being there for him. I can’t date right now, Prune. Not anyone.”

XY hummed thoughtfully. “Well, I mean…it’s kind of messed up to put your whole life on hold for someone like that, but…I get it.”

Luka blinked, surprised that this conversation was going so well. “Wait. What? You do?”

XY nodded. “I know how you are. You always put yourself last when someone you care about needs you. You’d do the same if it was me having the meltdown or one of your sisters or your ex, Jacob, or whoever, you know? You’re just like that.”

A sheepish smile gradually made itself at home on Luka’s lips. “I do have a bit of a martyr complex, don’t I?”

XY held up his thumb and pointer finger, bringing them so that they were only a few centimeters apart. “Just a teeny, weenie bit…but I’d put my life on hold for you too, so…I get how you feel about Adrien, even if I don’t like it.”

Luka winced again as guilt weighed down on him. “Prune, I’m so sorry. I—”

XY held up a hand. “Just answer me this: could you love me, do you think?”

Luka bit his lip, not wanting to lead his friend on but not wanting to lie either. “Xavier-Yves, I don’t want you waiting around for me.”

XY shrugged. “Tough. Sometimes you don’t get what you want. Isn’t that what you taught me? Just answer the question.”

Luka sighed. “Oh, all right. Yes, but please don’t wait around for me.”

“I do what I want,” XY snickered. “I know you’re picking Adrien, but there’s no telling when he could screw it up and give me a chance to sweep you off your feet.”

“Xavier-Yves,” Luka groaned.

XY tussled Luka’s hair with an affectionate smile. “All joking aside, I hope you change your mind about me, but I just want you to be happy, Six Strings. Okay?”

Luka’s eyes narrowed as he tried to discern any hint of deceit.

He found none.

“For real?” he asked in amazement.

Xavier-Yves nodded. “For real. So…can we still be friends? How does this work?”

“Absolutely,” Luka assured vehemently. “I never want to lose what we have, Prune. If we could just go on like we have been…?”

XY nodded in agreement. “I’d be down with that. Besides, who knows? Maybe one day I’ll get lucky and you and Adrien and me can be a threesome. The kid’s kind of cute when he’s not being a brat.”

Luka burst out laughing.

He shook his head and clicked his tongue. “Adrien’s cute especially when he’s being a brat.”

“You can have him when he’s in brat mode, then,” XY snorted, starting to pack up his things. “But I should skedaddle. I’ve got to meet up with my dad to talk about my next album. Want me to text you when I’m done?”

“Please,” Luka responded, leaning in to press a whisper of a kiss to XY’s cheek. “Thanks, Prune.”

Xavier-Yves grinned, winking as he got to his feet. “Sure thing, Six Strings. Check ya later.”

“Later,” Luka echoed, waving after XY as he went.

As XY disappeared from view, Luka took a deep breath and closed his eyes, trying to process everything that had just happened.

He sat for a few minutes, waiting until he felt more grounded to get up and head for his room. He needed an instrument to help him sort through everything. Maybe his guitar or violin. He always processed best through those.

He stopped in the narrow hallway just outside his door when he thought he heard something.

Frowning, he listened hard, and it wasn’t long before he heard the muffled, choked sound again.

He took a few steps and stopped outside of Adrien’s cabin door to listen again.

It was now more apparent that the strangled sobs were coming from within.

“Adrien?” He knocked perfunctorily before opening the door and finding Adrien curled up in a ball around his pillow, bawling his eyes out.

“Adrien,” he breathed, rushing to his beloved’s side. “Hey, what’s the matter? What happened?”

Adrien gasped, sitting up and gawking at Luka in horror.

“N-Nothing. I—Nothing,” he insisted even as he gritted his teeth in his effort to stop the tears.

His lip trembled, unable to help itself in Adrien’s distress.

“Oh, P5,” Luka muttered, kicking his shoes off and climbing up onto the bed with Adrien. “Come here.”

He pulled Adrien onto his lap and squeezed him tightly, cooing, “It’s okay. Whatever it is, it’s okay. Just let it out.”

To both of their surprise, Adrien did.

He clung to Luka as a fresh wave of grief washed over him.

Dutifully, Luka held him, rocking him from side to side and making reassuring noises. He didn’t let go until Adrien had worn himself out.

Adrien didn’t have the strength to fight as Luka gently cleaned up his face for him afterwards. He also found himself unable to protest when Luka tugged him into the main cabin and snuggled up on the couch with him.

It barely registered when Luka started Castle in the Sky, and Adrien remained nearly catatonic through dinner.

The fog of misery only cleared at bedtime when Luka tried to herd Adrien into his own cabin, saying, “Why don’t you come sleep in my room tonight?”

“I want to be alone,” Adrien insisted petulantly, trying to pull away.

Luka’s grip on him tightened. “I don’t think that’s the best idea right now.”

“I said I want to be alone,” Adrien growled, finding the strength within him to break away.

He turned on his heel and fled to his cabin, taking refuge under his covers from the world.

His solitude only lasted a matter of minutes.

Luka entered and silently made up a sleeping bag on the floor as Adrien glared him down.

“…I’m sorry,” Luka finally sighed, taking a seat on top of his blankets and meeting Adrien’s hostile gaze. “I won’t talk to you or anything, so just pretend I’m not here.”

“What do you want from me?” Adrien demanded half testily, half sulkily.

Luka shook his head. “Nothing. I just want to make sure you’re all right. I’m really worried about you, Adrien.” He hesitated before adding, “Whatever’s going on, I’m here, okay? I love you. I hope you know that.”

It was too much.

Tears spilled freely down Adrien’s cheeks, and he quickly absconded back under the covers.

Half an hour passed in relative silence as Adrien struggled to get his emotions under control and Luka stared up at the ceiling, feeling helpless.

“…Orpheus?” Adrien called, voice raw and plaintive as he peeked out from under the covers.

Luka sat up. “Yeah? What is it? Are you okay?”

Adrien swallowed audibly. “…Could you come up here and just…just hold me, please?”

Luka breathed out a sigh of relief, smiling indulgently as he climbed over Adrien to take his place by the wall.

“Happy to help,” he assured, slipping under the covers and pulling Adrien close.

Adrien wrapped himself around Luka like a vine, burying his face in Luka’s neck. “Sorry. And sorry about the way I’m acting. I’m not being fair. It’s not your fault, and I shouldn’t be taking it out on you.”

“It’s okay,” Luka replied reassuringly. “Thank you for the apology, though. I appreciate it…. Do you maybe want to talk about it?”

Adrien shook his head definitively. “No. Thank you.”

“Okay,” Luka agreed, backing off the issue.

In the morning, if Adrien still didn’t want to talk, Luka would encourage him to go see Nino or Marinette or check with Doctor Katsuragi to see if she had an opening for them to discuss Adrien’s sudden turn for the worse.

“…I…I love you too,” Adrien hiccupped.

Luka squeezed him tighter, giving his hair a nuzzle. “I know. Don’t worry, Angel. I’m not going anywhere. We’re going to get through this together, all right?”

Adrien nodded, but his tears started to fall faster.

23 notes · View notes

awhitehead17 · 4 years ago

Text

Universal Signs

Epilogue / Previous Chapter

A/N: This is the final chapter and I want to say a huge thank you to everyone who has read this story, who has stuck by it from the start and to everyone who interacted with the story. It's all greatly appreciated, so thank you.

Also on AO3

Enjoy! :D

After slapping a sticky note on the fridge Tim heads out into the gardens of Wayne Manor. He feels the need to be alone and plus he wants some fresh air, the garden is a great place that provides him with both of those things. The note just happens to be letting everyone know where he’s gone off to. It wouldn’t be the first time its happened so they know to leave him be.

Tim walks through the grass and heads into the cluster of trees at the back of the property. Over the last few months, this area has become his escape for solitude. It’s peaceful, hidden away from the manor and no one else goes there. There’s a small gap in the grove, it’s big enough for him to settle on the ground, the tree roots emerging from the ground provide a good support to lean on and the grass there keeps it somewhat comfortable.

He comes here when he needs a break and today is no different. Being inside the manor is suffocating him and Tim just needed to get out, he needed to get away from the same walls in attempts to try and clear his mind.

Settling down on the ground Tim lets out a sigh and takes a moment to observe the nature around him. The leaves on the trees are slowly beginning to turn into a mixture of reds, oranges and browns, a clear sign that autumn is on the way. There are birds chirping away in the trees. There’s an occasional rustling of leaves where there are squirrels hurrying along the branches above him.

After a while he closes his eyes and leans back against the tree root he’s come to favour over time and lets his mind wonder.

It’s been six months since he’s returned home from being in space. At this point he’s somewhat adjusted to being back however there are plenty of times when he struggles with it. There are as many good days as there are bad days, they seem to balance one another out with how often they each occur.

The first month had been the hardest. His emotions were all over the place, everyone was on high alert, there were so many things Tim needed to catch up on like events in the world and even just his family relationships. Tim’s mental health went downhill, not alarmingly so considering what had happened but it was still a cause of concern for his family. He was constantly hit with anxiety, paranoia, disorientation, nightmares and insomnia.

Tim absolutely refused to go to therapy. No matter how much his family tried to convince he just outright refused, even straight up walking out of the room when the word was mentioned. He knows it would be good for him, however what the fuck was he supposed to say? How would he describe about being kidnapped by aliens? They would think he's insane and would probably try to lock him up in an asylum! The easiest way to avoid that is to simply avoid therapy.

He did find though once he told Dick and Jason what happened things became a little easier. A weight disappeared from his shoulders and he could be open with his brothers. Not about everything that occurred but most things and that alone made a difference.

Things stayed rocky throughout the second month and it wasn’t until the third month that things started to improve. Tim started to handle his mental health better, it took some time but he came across a variety of resources online and used those as guidance. While he didn’t magically heal overnight and still had problems, they slowly became less severe and easier to handle.

When the fourth month came around they let the public see Tim for the first time since he returned. That had been a mistake. The Wayne’s are well known in Gotham City (and somewhat the world) so there had been spotlights on them from the moment it got declared Tim was missing. While the spotlight lessened over the course of the two years Tim had been gone, once Tim’s return made it to the news the family were instantly highlighted once again.

Bruce and his team kept Tim out of the way, they kept statements and quotes pretty vague and anonymous. Of course there were lots of conspiracies on what had happened to Tim, where he had been that entire time and how he had managed to return home. If Tim was being honest some of the theories were pretty hilarious, though not one of them even came close to the truth.

The time they decided to get Tim out in public was during the annual charity event that took place in city hall. Majority of his family were attending meaning Tim wouldn’t be alone, the spotlight would theoretically only be on him for a few moments until the next celebrity showed up. Tim had been reluctant at first but after reassurances from his family he said yes. After all if he made an appearance the media may calm down and leave them alone.

The moment Tim stepped out of the limo they arrived in he had been bombarded and it didn’t let up the entire night. Even with his family there and the bodyguards no one really left him alone. The press were savages hunting for food.

Before getting kidnapped Tim could handle the press well, he knew how to play the game, how to avoid and deflect questions and answers, but this time he couldn’t. It was all too overwhelming, his emotions and mind went into overdrive and panic. He couldn’t help the panic attack no matter what, fortunately his family caught on to what was happening and managed to get him away somewhere private by the time the attack happened. They supported him through it and then called it a night. He hasn’t been in public since.

The fifth month had been a mixture of month two and three. Tim had his ups and downs but he was handling it the best he could. His family were always there to support him no matter what.

During the fifth month Tim decided to tell Bruce what had happened. He sat down with his adoptive father, Alfred too, in his office and Tim told him everything that had happened. Tim had been a nervous wreck and it took encouragement from Dick and Jason for him to finally do it.

Both Bruce and Alfred seemed to take it in stride. At first they seemed like they didn’t believe him but after a couple of days thinking about it they said to him they believed him, why would Tim make up something like that? On the other hand his story seemed to only encourage Bruce to try and get him a therapist even more and once again Tim blatantly refused. He argued he was handling it and so on. With reluctance Bruce dropped the topic but Tim knows it’ll come up again soon enough.

Now though, at six months, Tim thinks he’s doing okay (besides the obvious). He would like to believe he’s doing okay. There’s not a day that goes by where he doesn’t think about the aliens that saved him, or some of the events and adventures that had happened when he had been with them.

If there’s anything positive that’s come from his experience it’s that he's decided on a career change. Before getting kidnapped Tim had been working at Wayne Enterprises in the offices doing a mixture of roles. At the time he had been looking into the future of helping Bruce to run the company, he was well on his way to do it too despite his age. However his trip has opened his eyes up and he’s decided a career change seems suitable. He’s now going into astrophysics. A job in the sciences and looking at space, time and the universe.

Tim has only recently started up online courses because he needs to work on getting a degree in the field before moving onto getting an actual job in the area. He’s smart enough for it, and now that he has the interest and even first-hand experience in the area its all the more interesting. He finds it particularly fun when the question “is there life on other planets?” come up.

Apart from the online classes Tim’s time is spent catching up with things and generally chilling around the house unless he's dragged into something by one of his siblings.

Oh, doesn’t that make him think of another major adjustment he’s had to come to terms with. Damian. Bruce’s biological son. Tim knows his story of arriving to the Manor but he doesn’t fully know the details of his past. There was tension between them but they were civil to one another any time they cross paths. It certainly took time, and still is taking time, to get used to that he has a younger sibling. On the bright side at least he’s not the youngest anymore!

It was also thanks to Damian that Tim learnt that his universal translator works on Earth too. Upon his arrival back home, Tim had completely forgotten about the little device installed in his teeth and the remote that came with it. His mind had been on other things after all but it wasn’t until Damian spoke in his native tongue, Arabic, that Tim realised the translator is still implanted in him and it works with Earth languages too.

After that discovery Tim spent a good five hours on YouTube watching a range of videos in a variety of languages. It blew his mind that he could understand every single one of them. However, even though he can understand them, he can’t speak the languages nor can he write or read them. It had been an interesting discovery, now any time Damian speaks Arabic and Tim hears him, he can’t help but snicker at the teen’s language and the kinds of names he calls their siblings.

He sighs again, feeling oddly unsettled. His life seems almost rather dull now in a way. If anyone heard him say that after knowing everything he went through they would call him insane, but it’s like his “space life” had always been one adventure after another, always something to do, or a danger to be aware of. Now that he's back on Earth where there’s not so much of that it feels strange.

With that pleasant thought in his mind Tim opens his eyes up and starts to make a move to leave. He usually comes out to this forestry area to clear his mind but unfortunately today that doesn’t seem to be the case, his mind doesn’t seem to want to shut up. Tim trudges back to the Manor through the gardens as the sun begins to lower signalling the approach of the evening.

The next few days seem to repeat themselves until the weekend rolls around. It’s Saturday when Dick decides he wants to take Tim shopping. It’s a risk going out into public like that, as Tim pointed out to him, but Dick argues it’ll do him good to leave the Manor and how it’ll make a change of scenery for him.

Tim only agreed in the end when they compromised they’ll only be out for no more than three hours. Dick wanted more and Tim would prefer less, three seemed to be a good balance for them. Apparently his brother wanted to get himself some new clothes and there was the fact he needed to get Barbara something for her birthday that’s quickly approaching.

Together they go to the closet mall and Dick drags him into about five different clothing shops. The man gets himself a variety of new autumn clothes and even grabs Tim a fluffy sweater and a new jacket. Tim really did have to stop him when he tried to by an elephant onesie though, Dick may like the damn things but that didn’t mean Tim did.

After clothes shopping Dick decided to duck inside a jeweller’s shop on the way out of the mall. While Dick is inside buying who knows what, Tim choses to wait for him outside the shop. He stands by the door, leaning against the frame and people-watched as they walked by.

No one paid him much attention as they went about their days. Each person, family, couples all absorbed in whatever activity they were doing or what shop they wanted to get to. It still was bizarre to Tim, even after six months, that everyone here just goes about their days without the slightest bit of clue to what’s out there above and beyond. It makes him wonder what and where he would be if he never got kidnapped.

Tim shifts his position against the frame, propping his back up against it more as he continues to look around. He freezes however when something catches his eyes at the other end of the mall. There’s a small group of people who were stood off to the side by the wall out of the way from everyone that catches his attention. Their heads were ducked together as they spoke to one another and they all had their backs to Tim so he couldn’t see their faces. Tim doesn’t look away though because there’s something about them that seems familiar.

He’s not sure how long he stares at the group of three but they don’t move from their position in that time at all. He doesn’t think they’re up to anything as they don’t seem suspicious but there’s a tugging feeling inside of Tim that’s telling him there’s more to the group.

When one of them turns their head around to observe the surroundings as if trying to find something, Tim gasps. Surely that can’t be…

“Tim!”

Tim blinks and looks away from the group to find Dick standing next to him looking at him curiously.

“What’s gotten into you? You okay, I was calling your name for ages.”

Tim blinks at him again before looking back over the group, he sucks in a breath when he finally sees all three faces of the group. He watches with wide eyes as they start to move from their position and Tim knows he needs to go after them.

Without saying anything he pushes off the door frame and heads in that direction as the group starts walking in the opposite way. If Tim doesn’t catch up to them now then he’ll lose them and that isn’t an option.

However he doesn’t get more than a couple steps away before he's stopped as his arm is caught in a tight grip by his older brother. Tim tugs his arm roughly as he tries to get Dick to let him go. He frantically looks between his brother and the slowly retreating group.

“Dick, please, let me go… I need to go.” Tim begs. He could feel the desperate need to go and approach that group, he could feel his heart pounding and even some excitement stirring inside of him.

Dick’s grip only tightens. “What the hell you on about Tim?” His words are stern but Tim could hear how they’re said with an anxious tone.

Tim tugs his arm again, this time reaching out with his other to shove Dick away. “I’ll explain, I promise, just let me go…”

“No, not until you tell me what you’ve seen.”

When Tim looks over the group was now almost out of sight and Tim could feel his heart dropping. This was his last chance just to make sure he hadn’t been seeing things. Knowing Dick wasn’t going to let him go, Tim shoves him hard and yells at him.

“Let me go!”

In either shock or panic, Dick lets him go and Tim couldn’t be more relieved. As soon as his brother’s hand is off his arm Tim is shoots off in an instant, he ignores all the eyes now staring at him as he runs by them in the direction the group had disappeared from.

Miraculously he manages to catch up to the retreating group. He spots the three familiar figures manoeuvring their way through the crowd heading towards the other end of the mall where an exit is. Tim rushes forward, not caring about how manic he looks as he passes by strangers, and as soon as he’s in hearing range he shouts to try and get their attention.

“Kon! Kon, Cassie! Guys. Bart!”

The shouts get him a few more weird looks but he continues to be oblivious to them as he’s tunnel visioned on the three people in front of him. Thankfully his shouting gets the attention of the right people because the group stop and turn around in their place.

Suddenly Tim couldn’t breathe. There in front of him were the aliens who he thought he would never see again, the aliens who saved his life numerous of times and the ones who returned him home.

Kon, Cassie and Bart stand in front of him staring back seeming just as shocked as he is. For a long time none of them move as they all take in that they’re actually seeing one another again. If Tim weren’t so surprised by their appearance he would be questioning it, but he’s too elevated to give it much thought in that moment.

Without realising it Tim is moving and so were they. They meet in the middle and Tim finds himself wrapped up in a group hug. He breathes deeply, wondering why the action feels so familiar, and even safe, when he hasn’t seen them in six months.

He pulls back and looks wildly between the three of them. He can’t believe they’re here. Could this be a dream?

“Tim! We were just looking for you!” Bart grins brightly.

Tim shoots him a look, then glances at the other two. “Looking for me? Why what’s going on? Wait, wait, wait, how are you guys here? Why are you here?”

Bart’s smile falters a little at Tim’s rapid questions. “Because we wanted to find you.”

Tim shakes his head, feeling a little guilty that his questions came across wrongly. “No, I didn’t mean it like that, I’m just completely surprised to see you that’s all. This is totally unexpected.”

“Tim, as wonderful as it is to see you, do you know a place we can talk privately and not in the middle of… this place.” Cassie says glancing around cautiously.

Tim copies her and he finally realises how many people are looking at them funnily as well as giving them a wide berth as they pass by. Tim nods his head in understanding, this isn’t the kind of topic a group of people can discuss in the middle of the mall.

Just as Tim was thinking of a place they could go for privacy a shout gets his attention.

“Tim what the hell!” He turns around and is met with a furious Dick marching up to him. “What the fuck were you thinking running off like that?”

Tim huffs and rolls his eyes, he gets why Dick is worried but at the end of the day he is in fact an adult and not a toddler. “Dick it’s fine, I’m sorry but this is important.”

Dick studies him for a moment before his eyes flicker over to the three aliens standing opposite them looking awkward at the sudden appearance of his brother.

“Right so, Dick, this is Kon, Cassie and Bart,” he points to each alien in turn, “guys, this is my oldest brother Dick.”

There is a pause between them all and while the aliens look confused he could see the wheels turning inside of Dick’s mind. As if it’s clicked, Dick turns to Tim with wide eyes, “Are these the ones that saved your life?”

Tim smiles, feeling pleased that his brother has remembered his story and those involved. “Yeah that’s right.

“What are they doing here?”

Tim shrugs and turns to the others. “What are you guys doing here, beside looking for me?”

“Can we go somewhere else first Tim. Like away from all the eyes.” Cassie says pointedly.

Next to him Dick looks confused. “Tim what did she say? Wait, how do you understand them? That isn’t any language I’ve heard of.”

Tim blinks trying to comprehend everything going on. The aliens that saved his life are on Earth and he doesn’t know why, his brother is clearly confused and the others are looking at him expectantly. Tim is starting to feel pretty overwhelmed by it all.

In attempts to control his thoughts and emotions Tim takes a deep breath. “Right lets go somewhere else. Then everything can be explained.”

The private place they end up going happens to be a nearby park. It’s a large open space, where people are scattered over the place, it’s private in the sense that no one is paying them any attention and unless someone walks directly next to them, no one can hear their conversation.

The five of them settle down on the grass in a circle, the aliens and even Dick all look a little apprehensive for the choice of location but it’s not like there’s many others. It’s not like Tim and Dick can return home with the aliens in tow and expect Bruce to be okay with it.

“Right,” Tim says getting everyone’s attention. He glances at his friends, while still feeling completely gobsmacked by the fact they’re here, and gets down to business. Tim needs to find out what’s going on.

Now they’re all sat down Tim blurts out his questions without restraint. “How are you guys here? Why are you here? I thought you were all being punished or put on probation? Did you complete it, did it end and now you’re free to do as you please once again?”

None of them respond to his rapid questioning, they each look at him blankly like they couldn’t understand what he’s saying. When the silence drags out for too long Tim is about to repeat them when Kon speaks up for the group.

The Kryptonian sends him an empathetic look and with patience says, “Let us just explain what’s happened that’s brought us here, hopefully the story will answer your questions.”

Tim has to retrain himself from firing out the questions again. He wants answers! He can’t believe they’re here, he thought he would never see them again but here they are!

Next to him Dick lightly smacks his shoulder to get his attention. “Tim what are they saying? What’s going on?”

His brother is looking awfully confused and concerned. Tim can’t exactly blame him. He’s dragged Dick with him to sit down with practically three strangers and is now witnessing a one-sided conversation because he can’t understand the other three.

“They’re about to explain why they’re on Earth. I honestly thought I would never see them again, I’m just as confused as you are.”

“Are you sure this is a good idea Tim. What if it’s some sort of… trap or something?”

A surge of anger rises inside of Tim at the accusation. He understands Dick’s worries but this isn’t a trap and he knows it. They wouldn’t do that to him, not after everything they went through together.

“Dick shut up for a moment.” Tim snaps at him after a pause once he’s got his emotions under control. “Also they can understand you too, so watch what you say. If you don’t like it, go away and I’ll come find you later, or sit here and be quiet, it’s your choice.”

Dick stares at him, clearly taken back by the aggression of his words. But Tim isn’t relenting. He narrows his eyes at his brother, daring him to say something. In the end Dick raises his hands up in surrender and stays where he is. Once he’s delt with Tim turns back to the aliens.

“Sorry about him, there’s just a little misunderstanding. Please tell me what happened and how you’re here.”

Kon launches into the explanation of what happened after they took Tim home. Apparently they returned back to Krypton before finishing off their collection job, what they had originally been doing when they first met Tim. Once they completed that they were put on probation and were kept under watchful eyes for a long time. They weren’t allowed on any missions, they had to go back to the basic training skills and from there build the trust back up with their so called leaders.

Once some trust was established they were allowed on missions but only with other older members of their squadron, they described it like someone was babysitting them. They also had to report back on anything and everything during the mission. Because of good behaviour from the each of them, they were then allowed out on missions independently as a team some time later.

After more trust had been built, after they had once again proven themselves apparently Kal approached them for a very specific mission that would suit their abilities and past experiences.

Kal had given the three of them the mission of doing recon and observing humans on planet Earth. Apparently their files and databases don’t have enough accurate information on humans and after the fiasco with Tim, it’s about time they start taking human beings into consideration and start learning about them properly.

The three of them were to stay on Earth for an extended period of time to gather the data they need and to regularly report back to the leaders with their findings. They didn’t go into detail on what it is they need to do or what they need to observe but Tim can easily overlook it because at the end of the day they are in fact here on Earth and with him.

“So Kal sent you here on Earth to ‘observe’ humans because of you guys knowing me?” Tim asks just so he’s clear on it all.

The three of them grin and nod in response. Amused, Tim snorts softly. He settles back on the grass, using his elbows to keep him propped up. “Surely he knows that as soon as you land you would try and find me. By the way, how did you find me? I thought I was unable to be tracked?”

“We parked the ship where we dropped you off. We’ve hidden the ship from anyone seeing it or anything detecting it. Once we’ve found a more suitable place we’ll move the ship.” Cassie explains waving her hand around subconsciously as she talks. “Knowing that the city next to it is the one you said you lived in, we took a chance and started looking for you. As you pointed out, we can’t track you, so we’ve been relying on nothing but hope and chance in bumping into you.”

Tim shakes his head in disbelief. So it had been by pure chance that they happened to be in the same part of the city, in the same mall, at the exact same time as Tim.

“I’ve always wanted to come to Earth, especially after meeting you Tim. It’s strange, different from other planets we’ve visited before. Also why are the days so short? Everything is bright because the sun is out and you’d practically blink and it would suddenly be dark, but after that you’d blink another time and it’s light once again.” Bart starts rambling from his position in between Tim and Kon. He looks around curiously, taking in everything and Tim could see him shaking in place, it’s like it’s taking all of Bart’s self-restraint to not go speeding off into the city in his excitement.

Tim laughs at his comments, Bart is just the same as he remembers. They all are really and it fills Tim with a warmth he can’t describe.

“How have you been since you’ve been back? Is everything alright, run into any trouble?” Kon asks him sounding concerned. Tim notices the way his eyes drift over to Dick who is currently on his phone not paying them much attention. Tim gets the feeling Kon may be feeling a bit protective of him, especially after seeing how Dick had unintentionally treated him earlier.

Tim shrugs, pulling a face as he looks around the park. “No more than what was expected to be honest.” He looks back at the alien. “So far, and touch wood, I haven’t run into or even seen any League members. There’s been my own personal stuff I’ve had to deal with but nothing like what you’re thinking of really.”

Cassie sits up straighter, she’s also eyeing Dick like he could be a threat of some kind. “And him there?”

Tim rolls his eyes in response. When will everyone stop treating him like a kid that constantly needs to be protected? “He’s fine. He gets a little over-protective and after not seeing me for a couple years, especially after what happened, he wants to make sure I’m fine. He’s not a threat.”

Both Cassie and Kon don’t seem satisfied with his answer but they let it go. Tim lets out a long breath. “So what now? You guys are here, what did you have in mind once you found me? How are you planning on completing your mission?”

“We were hoping you would be able to show us things about the human life.” Bart says looking at him hopefully. “After all, you know what you’d be talking about, there’s also the matter of fact no one can understand us except you because of the translator.”

“Yeah okay, I think I’d be able to help you. After all, it’s the least I can do since you saved my life several times. However I won’t be able to be with you all hours of the day, I have commitments to deal with as well.” Tim points out. He would love to help them out but he can’t just drop his life to do so, not that there’s really much going on but that’s not the point.

The three of them nod in unison, clearly understanding what Tim meant. “Any help would be great Tim, thank you.”

They get talking about a few other bits, like what they have discovered since being on Earth for themselves. During that conversation there were a lot of snarky comments made about how underdeveloped humans were, surprisingly those comments no longer annoy Tim, he simply rolls his eyes and moves onto the next thing.

Tim’s broken out of the conversation after Dick nudges him to get his attention. Tim blinks at him, completely forgetting he was even there to begin with. “Tim it’s getting late, we should probably get heading home.”

Tim glances at the clock on his own phone and is surprised to see the time. They’ve spent hours talking and catching up.

After a brief conversation about where they could meet up the next day, they settle on a time and place before parting ways. Once they were out of hearing range Dick puts his attention on Tim. “So they were the aliens who saved you? I didn’t expect to meet them, they don’t look like what I expected them to.”

Tim rolls his eyes. “I have described to you before what they look like Dick, not all aliens are huge and green with tentacles, antennas and multiple eyes.” He certainly isn’t going to tell Dick that there are in fact aliens that look exactly like that.

Dick laughs at his sarcasm. “You know that’s not what I meant. They each have a different language yet you spoke to the three of them with no problems.”

“Yeah that’s because of the universal translator I have planted in my teeth. Its one of the first things they did when they found me. Once it was implanted I was able to understand everything they said, it’s how they all communicate out there.”

The two of them finally reach the car and climb inside.

“So what are they doing here on Earth?” Dick asks as he starts the car up and begins driving them home.

“They’re here because they’ve been sent to do recon on humans, they need to report back their findings to their leaders. While being here they decided to come and find me, they have also asked if I could help them out. Since they saved my life, agreeing to help them isn’t an issue, it’s the least I could do.”

Dick asks him a few more questions about what they discussed, his brother is still put off by the fact they all have different languages and yet they can all understand one another, but on the most part he seems okay with them.

It makes Tim wonder if he should let his family officially meet the aliens, if he did how would it all play out? Communication will obviously be an issue, Tim will have to be their translator but it may be worth considering in the long run. The aliens showing their powers to the family would certainly be interesting and with how private Wayne Manor is, they could get away with it and not be spotted.

Those thoughts remain in Tim’s mind for the rest of the day, into the night and stay with him until the next day when he meets the aliens again. Tim makes sure to keep them all away from too crowded areas (they ended up in the park again) and makes sure he’s prepared for anything that may go wrong. It’s one of the first times he’s left the grounds on his own since returning home and he’s nervous. His anxiety does calm down a little when he finally meets with his friends but he stays alert just in case.

They have a brilliant day together. Tim answers as many questions as he can when they each ask him stuff, he also shows them what he could, stuff that really helps humans in their day to day lives, for example his mobile phone. Alongside that Tim introduces them to the internet. Witnessing them using google for the first time was as amusing as it was painful to watch.

Don’t even get him started about when Bart tried to talk to Siri.

When their day starts drawing to close, Tim’s earlier thoughts come back to the fore front of his mind. In the end he decides to bite the bullet and turns to the aliens.

“How would you all like to meet my family?”

There's a pregnant pause between them and before anyone could reply Tim starts rambling on. “I know that communication may be an issue but we can get around that. I think it would be good for you to meet the ones I spend most of my time with. Not only that, I can then also show you what human family life is like, how homes operate and what gardens can be like. It may be worth considering?”

When there’s more silence Tim winces, curing himself for his eagerness. It’s stupid, of course they wouldn’t like the idea. Why would they –

“Yeah okay. That sounds interesting, of course only if you’re sure about it.” Kon says eventually looking thoughtful.

Tim whips his head around and stares at him. “Really? You want to?”

Kon shares a look with the other two, who nod in response, and turns back to Tim. “Like I said, if you’re sure about it, yeah.”

“Okay, okay…” Tim mumbles now getting equally excited and nervous about this happening. After they agreed Tim called Alfred up and asked the butler to come and pick them up. While on the phone Tim explained to Alfred the situation and how he’ll have company with him. God bless his soul, Alfred took it all in stride. While he seemed dubious about it, he agreed to let them come back to the manor.

Once Alfred arrived Tim took the others to the car and guided them inside. He greets Alfred before diving into an explanation on how cars work.

The journey back to the Manor is a short one and Tim has the fantastic opportunity to watch the awe expression cross his friends faces as they see the manor for the first time. Despite how many places they have travelled to, it seems like this really captures their attention, something that’s truly impressed them and Tim couldn’t help but feel slightly proud of that.

Once they’ve parked up, Alfred goes ahead first, probably with the main intentions of warning everyone what’s about to happen. Tim hovers behind for a while as he lets his friends stare at his home and the surrounding gardens. When more time than necessary has passed, Tim gently nudges them up towards the stairs, saying he’ll take them on a tour later on.

When they enter the manor they’re greeted with the sight of Alfred, Bruce Jason and Cass standing in the hallway watching them come in. Once they were all in Tim closes the door behind them and moves so he’s standing in front of his friends and faces his family.

Tim shuffles uncomfortably in his place, he’s feeling the apprehension of this meeting now more than ever. Taking a deep breath he addresses those in the room. “Everyone I would like you to meet Kon-el of Krypton, Cassandra of Themyscira and Bartholomew of Keystone. These three are the ones who saved my life while I was gone, without them I would have died long ago and never would have returned home. I owe them everything.”

Tim stares at each family member in turn, observing their reactions. Alfred of course is aware of them already and seems pretty neutral, Jason narrows his eyes at the aliens in distrust but doesn’t comment, Cass looks at his friends with curiosity which seems to be on the more positive side of things and finally Bruce seems stoic as ever, Tim couldn’t really tell what he’s thinking.

Eventually the thick atmosphere in the air is broken when Bruce steps forward, eyeing each alien carefully until a smile takes over his face and he relaxes his posture, letting go of what Tim could describe as the ‘alpha’ persona (the one where Bruce tries to make it clear he’s the one in charge and has all the dominance in the room).

“Thank you for helping my son and bringing him home. If I could ever repay you please let me know.”

Of course the aliens could understand Bruce but if they spoke then he wouldn’t understand them. In return to Bruce’s words, they each smile appreciatively and duck their heads. Bruce doesn’t seem bothered by the lack of verbal response, he resumes on as normal.

“Since we have guests how about something to eat. Tim, I’m sure your friends would be interested in trying some of our food?”

Tim glances at the trio, raising an eyebrow in question. They each look back at him and shrug nonchalantly, clearly not bothered either way, or at least that’s Kon and Cassie, Bart on the other hand looks as eager as ever to try food.

Tim turns back to Bruce. “Yeah they’ll eat. I hope you have a lot because Bart will literally eat everything in the house. He’s a Speedster and naturally eats more than the average person.” Tim laughs letting his adoptive father, and even Alfred, know in advance.

“There’ll be plenty Timothy, no need to worry about that. Now if you would like to follow me, I’ll show you where we will be eating.”

Without waiting Alfred turns around and heads into the depths of the manor. After sending a glare at each of their guests, Jason is quick to follow Alfred. Cass smiles politely and trails behind Jason with Bruce behind her.

The trio glance at Tim, clearly waiting for his cue before doing anything. Tim rolls his eyes and gestures on ahead, “Go, it’s going to be fine. Plus you’re going to absolutely love Alfred’s food, it’s the best.”

“If you say so…” Cassie mutters walking ahead.

Bart is about to speed off down the corridor but Kon catches his arm just in time to stop him from doing so. “Bart. Be careful, this isn’t somewhere you can easily run around in.”

“After we’ve eaten I can show you the gardens Bart, its plenty big enough outside for you to have free reign.” Tim says, knowing the Speedster’s way of dealing with his energy. Bart rapidly nods in response and starts after Cassie, not in a run but certainly a quick walk.

Then it’s just Kon and Tim left. They share a knowing smile. “It’s good to see you again Tim and it’s great to know that you’re still safe.”

Tim grins, feeling warmth rise up inside of him. Before saying anything he gestures for them to get walking, as they do he speaks up. “I missed you guys too. While I don’t particularly miss space and everything out there, I miss being with you three on the ship. I certainly wasn’t expecting to ever see you again.”

Kon shrugs, a sheepish smile playing on his lips. “Well we, or rather I, planned to visit you from the moment our probation was mentioned. I knew as soon as we had free reign again, we were going to come and visit you.”

Tim’s eyes widen at that. So even before they parted ways, Kon and the others had wanted to continue seeing him. “Well I’m glad you’re here, and that you’ll be here for an extended amount of time too.”

When they reach the dining room, they stop just short of the door. From inside loud sounds where being made and Tim dreads what kind of chaos he's about to walk into. It’s just another usual family dinner at this stage, there’s always some kind of drama going on. He turns to Kon with a thought, before he enters the room he shoots him a sly look, unable to help himself. The Kryptonian has no idea what he’s about to be in for.

“I’ve experienced your life Kon, now you get to experience mine. It’s probably going to be the wildest adventure you’ve had yet and that’s truly saying something, I hope you’re prepared.”

As he walks into the dining room, Tim leaves behind a bewildered looking Kon. For the first time since everything had happened, Tim is actually forward to what the future will bring. He knows that ups and downs will happen but he’s also excited to see what’ll occur with his new friends by his side as they learn about his way of life. It’s certainly going to be an experience.

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appledotcodotuk · 3 years ago

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why the hive fckin suck at its job: a rant

spoilers for tgwdlm ahead!

first of all, it's important to consider what exactly the hive's job is. my answer is... who the fuck knows. literally. what is the hive's aim. what do you want Paul? more like, what do you want hive? let's find out!

it kinda evolves, as the play progresses. the intial aim of the hive, and one that does actually remain consistent is the constant burning need to grow and devour and gain more and more (insert capitalism metaphor here).

however, this is distorted by the people it possess who influence that aim, as we'll see later.

also the fact it crashes into a theatre displaying Mamma Mia gives the hive the motive it need to fit the world around it to the structure of the musical. having no originality of its own, the hive instead just picks up what is given to it. kinda like an evil baby.

it wants uniformity, that is indeed its ultimate goal and desire, no duh. it thinks it can achieve that through musical theatre, shame that the hive is dead wrong. cause the hive fucking sucks at its own job / aim / ultimate purpose / one concrete goal that motivates all its actions.

can't maintain control over its subjects

okay, so, the hive wants uniformity. it wants everyone to be dancing to the beat of its own tune. right? yeah. shame it literally can't keep its own possessed subjects in line at all. at the risk of sounding like the 10th doctor waxing lyrical abt humanity for the 50th time, humans are really difficult to control cause we're not really motivated by an altruistic allegiance to one primary good. we've got icky emotions that often move us to do stupid unpredictable stuff way more. it makes me wonder if the reason the hive wanted to use musical theatre to try and persuade ppl was cause it seems to think that is how theyll get emotive humans; through emotive songs. anyways. let's look at some examples shall weeeee?

Mr Davidson:

so, Mr Davidson. funnily enough, he's the guy whose in part acting as the hive trying to figure out what it wants through his interactions w/ Paul. every person it possess gives it just a bit more humanity and curiosity abt the world it is currently taking over. at least I think so. hence why as the musical develops u get character's like possessed!Alice wondering 'why does it hurt to love?' - the change in music and mood to something much more introspective really suggests to me that the hive is beginning to question the thoughts and emotions of its human hosts.

Mr Davidson is a family man through and through, he loves his wife Carol. she's his muse, his source of light. his feelings for her are not concrete or easy to explain and solve - hence why his sudden ahem demand of her is so hilarious and also jarring. it completely clashes with the 'I want song' which is simple, and often pushes forward a wider cause. not so with Mr Davidson, he just really loves his wife man. enough to break a frickin alien possession.

tbh I think its hilarious that (at least to me) the hive has to force him to forget and continue with the song, like, he straight up is just talking to his wife in that phone call, talking, not singing. so, no possession until he reverts back into song. ergo, the hive cannot maintain the uniformity it wants. even from the get go when theoretically its control should be stronger cause it has less ppl to co-ordinate. bad. at. its. job.

Paul:

this one hurts folks. yes, I know it's generally agreed, though somewhat debated that the state of Paul by the end of the tgwdlm is not purely possessed. I agree. once again, the hive is unable to truly enforce uniformity.

at this point, the motives of Paul and the hive are kinda just mixed, neither fully human nor fully alien. hence the constant shifts between pleeing for her to get away, to hide, to stay safe: 'what if the only choice is you have to sing to survive' and just full on old style hive nastiness 'let me puke in your mouth and just open your food bin girl' (so romantic 🥰 /j).

the hive has gone away from its original aim, and become something... different. no longer stuck to just one type of genre or style of song, it's really clever to show the developing complexity of the hive by showing how it is now juggling lots of different motifs with references to all the old songs from before recontextualised in a new way - its learning. evil baby... no longer uniform.

general miscommunication:

there are several instances of the hive not fully having uniform control over its subjects. for instance, right after not your seed with the three teens having to like... calibrate. they aren't just completely connected then?? also, this is a very small thing, but uhhhh at the end of inevitable when Paul is about to say the apotheosis is upon... the chorus interrupts him with USSSSSSS. interruptions??? not very in sync of u hive.

I think this inability to exert uniformity is also shown in the contrast between genre of musical theatre. my alien abomination cannot decide whether it wants to be the more modern edgy rock musical (join us (and die), not your seed ) or super happy go lucky old style musical theatre (lah dee dah dah day, and inevitable). it tries to do both, even while trying to encourage union, and sticking to one thing. hypocrite!!!!!

2. aims are guided by the people it possess

so, I mentioned this a bit already, but the hive isn't only mutating the humans, the humans are mutating the hive right back. this is more an interesting observation than any actual analysis but let's goooo.

greenpeace girl:

I think it's very likely that greenpeace girl is one of the first to be possessed. This is probably easily debunkable but whatever this analysis is flying by the seat or its pants anywayyyyy. why? cause where else would it pick up that whole 'this planet needs fixing' thing? it's interesting too, cause it morphs from expressing the desire to join hands and sing together, unity and peace with no actual action behind it. this then goes right to the other end, with the hive going 'fine I'll do it myself' and trying to save things by enforcing a dictatorship on the world. it develops and changes, and strays from its original means of accomplishing its aims! speaking oooooof...

3. inconsistent in means of accomplishing aims

okay, ur an evil hive mind. u think musicals are the way to win over these silly humans cause they're all weak and emotive and seem to respond to them. but, wait! schwoopsie! you haven't realised that for emotional depth and growth to mean anything, you need there to be established development and well... growth. otherwise the sentiments are as vague as the ones expressed in What Do You Want, Paul?

this show has genuine emotional moments, just not really during the musical numbers WITH EXCEPTIONS. any strife is smoothed over quickly, and so the development and change that would have to go into such growth is just gone. (see, You Tied Up My Heart) all so it can achieve its own desire to grow and grow and grow, maybe a metaphor for art being killed under late stage capitalism??

what actually matters is the impact the songs have afterwards, in causing a death - because we have a bond and care abt these characters. those short scenes between Paul and Emma are actually way more resonant than any song. except... inevitable, and also not your seed a bit. at this point the hive has learnt a thing or two, and can actually twist human emotion a little. but for it to do that, it has to reject the uniformity it prizes, and be adaptable. point towards being more human than it first thought? methinks so. and yet it's just not enough...

it's also why let it out, to me, feels really ingenuine. Paul has expressed himself in much better ways already. what they're doing is clearly paining him, and hurting the guy. he's terrified bless.

you can't force someone into being emotional vulnerable, man.

it's why all the deaths for the characters who are forced to express themselves are really violent, involving them being ripped open - literally forcing them to expose themselves from the 'inside out' as Alice reflects in Not Your Seed. you can't force genuine emotional connection, it has to be fostered, shown in the much more affecting relationship of Paul and Emma. the only reason the hive actually has power over our characters is because of these genuine emotional connections, which it tries and often fails to take advantage of, resulting in just resorting to brute violence. messy hive, very messy.

at the core, the musical's a kinda attack on that toxic positivity mindst: trying to force people to reach the sort of easy solutions by sharing feelings in a way that feels pretty invasive and deciding you are instantly fixed. the problems these characters face are jarringly not really what you'd expect a character in a musical to face, cheating, a lot of it, mid-life crisis. problems that are bland, or wayyyy too real. this is purposefully done, to reveal just how silly the hive's aim to use musical theatre to solve everyone's problem is. life is more complex than that smh.

4. a human can write a much more expressive, and genuine song than they ever could lol

u know which song I'm talking abt. what more is there to say. so much for making persuasive songs to tempt people over.

5. make me sad cause they took some perfectly nice ppl and funked them up 😭

this was a stupid point lol. basically I'm just bitter that this hive took a bunch of perfectly okay ppl and gave them hive brain. screw u hive. I swear I'm gonna watch Black Friday soon, cause I'm sure it's gonna completely destroy every thought I've had so far, but whateve,,, just take this as a look at tgwdlm like it's a stand-alone piece.

these guys are supposed to all be 'individuals' on one level, but also 'appendages of a much larger organism'. there's a little too much individualism and fracturing to be cohesive enough to do that I feel. the hive to me is not an infallible, unstoppable force, in fact, every human it takes over only brings it closer to understanding us. so that's maybe a slight positive note??? idk ?! I just have lots of thoughts and feelings abt this musical even if this doesn't make sense I'm proud i wrote it down hehe.

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heademptycarla · 4 years ago

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∘₊✧ ─ ✧₊∘ ➵ @magslikesmusicals said; HELLO ITS ME AGAIN 😭 do you have any headcanons on vanessa, dani and carla’s relationship? i’m sorry that i’n flooding your inbox it’s just that i love your take on certain things!

you don’t need to apologise at all, it means a lot to me that ppl want to hear what i have to say about these things considering i’ve been sitting on a lot of my headcanons for a couple years but i’ve had no-one to tell them to !!

okay so the age difference between carla and daniela is considerable (like, twenty years), and no i won’t take any age gap slander here when it’s so obvious they’re both in a happy, loving, functioning relationship with no weird power dynamics – but this also makes the dynamic between the three of them quite interesting.

daniela isn’t traditionally very motherly, in fact at a first glance you’d wonder if she’s motherly at all because she has a tough exterior. but most everyone in the barrio knows that daniela is a ride or die, and if you need help she will help you, so long as you’re helping yourself too. (eg. in the original she refuses to help vanessa when vanessa refuses to put herself first above her mothers needs.) like i honestly consider daniela the next matriarch after abuela passes.

so because of this vanessa finds herself coming to daniela a lot, in fact i would say vanessa would come to daniela more than she came to abuela claudia during her young teen years because vanessa was worried about stressing abuela, whereas daniela would give it to her straight.

however, even though realistically vanessa and carla have the same kind of life experience despite their slight age difference (i headcanon vanessa like, early-mid twenties, and carla late twenties / just turned thirty ) carla often tries to give her advice and daniela isn’t afraid to step in and be like “no, this is what you want to do-“

but keep in mind, the second daniela suggests anything, carla immediately agrees. carla could be insistent on one thing one moment, dani steps in and suggests something else, and carla will be like “yep !!!! what she said !!!!!” ( she has the ability to think for herself, of course, but she just thinks dani is oh so v smart !! )

so instead of vanessa having two maternal figures in the couple, daniela is more like a maternal figure (giving tough love) and carla is more like a cool older cousin who doesn’t always encourage the best decisions.

dani is still very overprotective of carla, so if vanessa’s teasing gets a little much for carla to handle, she gives vanessa a look + vanessa knows to back off a bit. carla won’t always defend herself

i already said carla playfully bullies vanessa but dani also playfully bullies vanessa. daniela has been sending vanessa across the street for the most minor things hoping that she’ll catch feelings for usnavi, and carla doesn’t really understand this plan but she’s on board !!!!

#i'm so sorry this is so long hgjfkdhgkjlfdshgjkfdhgkjfdls #also idek if i gave you anything useful i'm sorry ghfdkjgfds #tell me something i don't know ∘₊✧ ─ ✧₊∘ ➵ answered #no me diga ∘₊✧ ─ ✧₊∘ ➵ personal #headcanon #headcanons #in the heights #in the heights film #ith #carla in the heights #daniela in the heights #vanessa in the heights #vanessa morales #also i know u won't judge the dynamic w dani and carla but i know others will ghfjdklsghfdlskj

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rosemary-is-in-pesterquest · 4 years ago

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ooh! I have thoughts on Eridan!

okay so, to me, Eridan ties into this thing that homestuck has going on with a lot of its more morally grey characters... the question of how responsible young people are for their negative qualities and actions, and where the age threshold for personal responsibility is.

the characters in homestuck all straddle this line between being young enough to consider them victims of the forces that influence them, while also old enough to understand what they're doing and how it affects others... especially because a lot of these kids come off as really smart for their age, and very precocious. we've all been through phases in our lives that make us cringe, not because we're ashamed of something harmless, but because we recognize that we had absorbed something harmful, and took longer than we wish we had to unlearn it. it could be as simple as being kind of a jerk in a misguided attempt to seem cool, or as dramatic as actually hurting someone in an attempt to remedy one's own insecurities by putting down others to seem better by comparison... but how far can you push that before people aren't willing to forgive? before people abandon the notion that better guidance and more appropriate role models could reform someone? and it's especially interesting when you consider how old homestuck's core audience might've been when they first encountered this story, and how it affected their perception of the characters if they saw them as peers, rather than as children from an adult's perspective.

so to talk about Eridan, I wanna frame this in terms of his classpect, because it actually goes a long way towards contextualizing his behavior. Eridan is a prince of hope, meaning that he destroys hope or uses hope to destroy... and this can be seen in practically every conversation he has. if Eridan is contacting someone, it is because he expects something of them. advice, or consolation, or a solution to a problem he's having... it's always something. when he contacts Kanaya, he wants her to auspistize between him and Vriska. when he contacts Feferi, he wants her to give him encouragement, and maybe date him when he asks. and in every case, the way he demands these things by being rude, whiny, or self pitying, makes people reluctant or unwilling to give him what he expects. he destroys what he hopes to obtain.

it goes deeper than that though. Eridan has absorbed this ideology of sea dweller superiority from living on Alternia... and he actually takes it way farther than it even makes sense to. the aristocracy on Alternia use the lower class for all sorts of menial work that they feel entitled not to have to do themselves. they might have the ability to freely cull individual low bloods for any reason, but eradicating all land dwelling trolls would leave a lot of unpleasant yet necessary tasks with no one to do them. I don't think Eridan actually wants to live in a reality where sea dwellers have to pick up the slack of doing things like sanitation work, or construction or something... but another concept that is heavily tied to the hope aspect is delusion. Eridan is exaggerating. he's trying to agree with Alternia's ruthless class structure so hard that it's actually kind of absurd. but Feferi calls him on that... she says she thinks that he self sabotages on purpose. because he knows, at least in some capacity, that the consequences of getting what he "wants" would actually be really uncomfortable to live with.

so not only is Eridan's goal to destroy... it is also a false goal that he constantly undermines. and all of his waffling between grandstanding and self pity destroys his romantic prospects, which are what he actually seems to want the most.

if you look at the way Eridan pursues relationships, he actually makes a lot of logical sense, but not a lot of emotional sense. he's idealized the act of perfectly filling the relationship requirements of each quadrant. he wants Feferi to be his matesprit, which is purely based on the fact that she's high enough on the hemospectrum to be an appropriate match in terms of status. he wants Vriska to be his kismesis, and Kanaya to be their auspistice, and there are hints that Karkat might've been someone he was considering for moiraillegience, though it wasn't emphasized as much. and there you go! his goal is specific, but it's based more on ideals than on the actual needs and feelings of the people involved, and it's totally self centered... he always wants them to cater to his own needs. the reason why he gets as nihilistic as he does on the meteor, is because all of his endeavors to achieve these relationships are falling through. he feels like he has no hope of mending his existing connections, because he still only sees them in terms of people either giving him, or not giving him, what he wants. but the rest of their race is dead. as the last twelve trolls in existence, they only have each other as romantic options. and as Eridan gets more and more desperate, he gets more and more demanding, which is the exact quality that drives everyone away from him to begin with, and it culminates in him having a "if I can't have what I want then nobody can have any of their hopes either" meltdown.

to backtrack a bit, I wanna reconsider questions such as, when is a kid old enough to be held responsible for their own negative qualities? like... when are you comfortable with ceasing to blame environmental factors? when are they just a bad person? is it after they've refused a certain number of chances to make better choices? when do they reach an age, or level of bad behavior, that makes you think they can't be helped to reform from these negative qualities? where does an adult lose their patience for the idea that a kid is just a victim of their upbringing?

obviously Feferi is Eridan's peer, but these are basically the questions she grapples with when she talks to Eridan. it's like growing up next door to a kid whose parents have some aggressively wrong-headed political stances. as you grow, that kid might mirror their parents' way of thinking... and by the time the two of you are in your teens, it's hard to ignore how much of a jerk that kid is becoming. but you've seen them at every step of their development. you know where it comes from. maybe theirs is the dominant political belief in the community, even if your own parents aren't like that. maybe you wonder if you would've agreed with them if you grew up under their circumstances. you've felt the pressure, but you haven't lived in it like they have, and maybe if they just had the chance to grow up under different conditions, they wouldn't be this way. and you are aware that you could be an influence on them... maybe they need you to help them see another perspective. you always got along so well as kids. when did things even change? and that's kind of where I imagine Feferi is at when we're introduced to her and Eridan. it's a crossroads between believing that you might still matter enough to them to change their outlook, and the persistence of their ingrained beliefs. it's tiring to do that kind of work, over a long period of time, to minimal results. when is the appropriate time to give up? in this way, Feferi's own hopes for Eridan fade over time. she says at one point that she was mainly acting as his moirail so he wouldn't try to underfeed her lusus and kill the land dwellers that way. she's not sure how serious he is, and she can't take that risk. deep down, I'm pretty sure Eridan knew he was never actually going to commit a genocide... but his need to grandstand, and legitimate belief in his caste superiority, had convinced Feferi enough that she still felt obligated to manage him as though he was a real threat.

these characters are thirteen years old. they're right at the edge of childhood and adolescence... right at the age where children aren't quite so innocent. they want to assert themselves. they aren't mature, so there's a lot of responsibility that they still shouldn't be trusted with yet, but they've become aware enough to feel like that's demeaning, and to want to be taken seriously. in an effort to make people acknowledge them without looking down on them, they'll try just about anything. they don't have the experience to know what they're doing yet, so it doesn't always work in their favor, and that's frustrating. you can see bits and pieces of this in homestuck's characters. like with the way they try to paint themselves as an authority on something, or shit talk each other in order to emphasize their own strengths. it's a really interesting theme, because homestuck pushes some of these young characters really far in terms of how bad the things they've done can be, or how much their lived experiences have taught them that what they're doing is acceptable. they can be really self aware in some ways, and come off as really childish in others. it's hard to know what you'd do about them in real life... and your answer changes depending on your own age and perspective. it's a really cool gray area to poke around in, and homestuck is excellent at it.

wtf I like Eridan now

#when you think about it a lot eridan really was just a misguided 13 yr old

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