#* &. you're still my best friend. ( VERITY )

[kennydied911]

"What died? Who are you mourning?" "A point of view." Or musings on facets of identity left holding the bag when the music stops

(spoilers for the Sandman comics and Loki Agent of Asgard)

YOU HAVE DIED! Congrats the previous facet of You just went out in a blaze! But of course since an idea as big as You (gestalt entity) can't die for realsies now there's you, yay happy birthday you poor fuck. The previous you left the barest of instructions and/or memories on how to be You but hey there's probably enough rattling in your skull to improvise! Probably! It'll be fine, it has to be after all the Previous you died and left you in charge so you were literally born for this (born? Eh, rose from your own ashes more like but that's semantics innit).

And it's unclear how far back the Previous you had planned this hard reboot ego death but no time to think about that, look it's all the Previous you's friends (maybe they'll be your friends too if you can convince them there's still enough You in there to love. Being a facet of a larger Whole is confusing to explain so good luck there bud). And they're mourning the Previous you who went and died on them. OOF.

You get to see your own funeral and it turns out that sucks actually, who knew? Now you get to stand there Alive while they look for the Ghost of you in your own face. Fun! Not awkward at all! (Hint: try not to flinch at the piercing question of why the previous you did this! you are the bullet and You are the shooter, you know exactly why You did this but good luck explaining it to anyone who isn't in Your head).

But you were chosen/designed/born full grown to Be a Better Version of You. Who knows what that means but whatever. Welcome to the burden of being a living palimpsest, no flinching from the spotlight now. Did you want this? Irrelevant! You're in it now darling so put on a show and do you best to dance around the previous you's still drying blood!

Change or die is the name of the game so you best hope you've changed enough (cue canned laughter from the Greek chorus). Heavy is the head that wears the crown and yours doesn't quite fit right just yet but It's Fine. (Two for flinching). And sure you're probably not as steady as the Previous Yous (but those poor fucks went and died so eh fuck'em) and you've got big shoes to fill so try no to stumble and ignore the blood pooling in them.

You've got this, you have your Role and you can adlib, fake it til you make it after all, and you have to make it, you Have To.

"Everything changes but nothing is truly lost." is your motto. Now there's your cue, put on a Face, step out on stage and give us a performance to remember (for as long as you can)! All the world's a stage darling so hopefully you'll fit right in.

[smirkingkitten]

Reading list November 2023

It's December and that doesn't just mean the Christmas season starts and it's the time for cozy evenings with candles, blankets and a hot chocolate, but also: it's time for another reading list.

It feels like it's been so long since Loki graced us with a new episode every week. I'm still not quite over the ending, although this interview did heal my poor heart a little, if only just a bit. I hope you're coping well with the ending. And now, happy reading.

✨And don't forget to reblog the storys you read to support all these lovely writers.✨

My other Reading lists can be found in my Fanfiction Bookshelf.

Series | Collections | Multi Parts

The Redbridge Hunts @fanficshiddles

8 Chapters (on going) | Vampire!Loki | fluff

prev. | Ch. 4 | Ch. 5 | Ch. 6 | Ch. 7 | Ch. 8

Summary: Claire moves to Demsdale to take up a new job as an assistant teacher for one Loki Laufeyson. She's also very intrigued with all of the rumours within the borough of Redbridge. However, as she starts to fall for Loki's charm and good looks, she also learns that all of the rumours might not just be rumours after all.

Double Cross @gigglingtiggerv2

12 chapters (on going) | Jaguar Villain!Tom | dark, smut

Summary: In Dante’s inferno, the Eighth Circle of Hell was reserved for liars, panderers, thieves and murderers.  For the criminal underworld it is an opulent London club, representing neutral territory where deals can be made, grievances aired and scores settled.

For the owner, Thomas Cross, it is his own private kingdom, one where he makes the rules and wields absolute authority. Recently, however, that authority has come under threat.  In order to maintain his standing and the Club’s ruthless reputation, it is imperative he find the perpetrator.

In this violent place, where lies are currency and everyone has their own agenda, who can he trust? Certainly not Verity Williams, the talented thief who has her own reasons for infiltrating his organisation. 

Neither can deny the sparks that fly whenever they’re together, but if he’s not careful, will those sparks burn down everything he’s created?

Déchiré @ijuststareatstuffhereok89

7 chapters (on going) | Loki, Bucky, Captain America | smut

You are a HYDRA agent sent to infiltrate the notorious Avengers, to tear them apart in the worst way possible in order to make them vulnerable to attack. In the midst of the wild heat you generate, three suitors take your bait.

One Shots

Firestarter @delaber

4,2k | AvengersMovie!Loki | smut, hatefucking

Rule Number One @just-the-hiddles

medium | Jonathan Pine | smut, dom/sub, daddy, spanking

Gorgeous @ghostofskywalker

1,2k | Avenger!Loki | fluff

Heavy Petting @wheredafandomat

800 | Loki | smut

I gave your girlfriend cunnilingus on my couch @wheredafandomat

short | Loki | smut, oral (f reserving)

Aftercare @sarahscribbles

680 | Loki | fluff, spicy

If I was your best friend @wheredafandomat

medium | Loki | smut

Worshiped by a God @sarahscribbles

1,1k | Loki | fluff, smut

Best of Friends @just-the-hiddles

long | Actor!Tom Hiddleston | fluff, friends to lovers

Duty of Care @muddyorbsblr

1,9k | Jonathan Pine | smut, fluff

Winter Warmers: A Winters Night on Asgard @lokischambermaid

930 | Asgard!Loki | fluff

The Sandwich Incident @holdmytesseract

1,2k | Tom Hiddleston | fluff, humour

My Girl @lokisgoodgirl

1,8k | Avenger!Loki | smut, man-bun

Lactation @viviluvssmut

1k | Loki | smut, oral (f reserving)

Drabbles

Don't Move, Darling @sarahscribbles

1,1k | Loki | smut, teasing, edging

Time slipping @wheredafandomat

600 | TVA Loki | smut, hurt/comfort

praise kink, gagging, hickies @ragnarachael

short | Jonathan Pine | smut, daddy kink

Headcanons

Loki and the Watcher @benevolentgodloki

✨Happy reading 😊✨

Back to my Fanfiction Bookshelf

Many of the fanfictions are 18+, so if you're under 18, don't read them.

[thestarfishface]

An assortment of D&Doodles I did while behind my artist table at a very slow con. I haven't had time to sit and doodle for weeks so I'm getting them all out of my system now.

My sweet baby Verity, a tiefling devotion paladin, finally reunited with her old BFF Rodin (dwarf cleric-turned-vengeance paladin) after she was dead for ~200 years and revived due to some shenanigans. Further context in the read more!

CONTEXT!!

Verity and Rodin reuniting after a very emotional fight where she basically watched him die (he was fine) (This is elaborated on in the next point)

A fuckin' evil wizard was after Rodin and using Verity as bait but part of Rodin's protection against the dude was to have a bunch of clones that were convincing enough for the evil wizard to kill and then leave, thinking his evil deeds were accomplished, leaving actual Rodin unscathed. It was still pretty traumatizing for Verity, though, as she didn't find out about the whole clone thing until AFTER she watched her best friend die horribly. She's going to have nightmares forever. Also, when not being used/killed off by evil wizards, the Rodin clones apparently just. Run around town running shit. So that's fun

TFW you find out that, after you died, your BFF spent the next hundred or so years being emo, writing poetry about you, and telling your story everywhere he went, then moved up in the world and started investing in small towns so they'd name stuff after you, getting bards to write 3-day-long epic plays about you, starting a legion of warriors and naming it after you, and getting so high in the social rankings that just about everyone knows who you are and thinks you're a big deal But now you're alive again and it's awwwwkwaaaarrrrdddddd

Verity's reaction to finding out about the Verity Museum, a few random doodles of her and Rodin (Rodin is hard to draw), and one of Rodin's tiefling great-granddaughter Certainty, who is 3x Verity's age but sees her as an ancestor and calls her "grandmother". Oh no

[authorscurse]

Love Leaves Scars: The Memories That Haunts

[L.L.S Masterlist] | [Main Masterlist] | [G.H Masterlist]

Warning: none

Pairing: Oc!Reader x Grayson Hawthorne

W.C: 2k

When I mentioned wanting lunch, ice cream never crossed my mind. Yet here I am, seated in a local ice cream store, eating ice cream with Nash Hawthorne.

The cold spoon rests delicately between my fingers as I idly swirl the melting ice cream before me. I can't bring myself to take even a small bite. The chill in the room should make me shiver, but I am unaffected by the cold.

When we were younger, Nash had a habit of whisking me away for ice cream whenever I'm upset. I think he still does. It should bring me joy. Overwhelming happiness. Reuniting with people you haven't seen for years should elicit elation, especially when they've had a significant impact on your life. But I feel none of that. Maybe I do feel it but choose to ignore it.

"Are you okay? You haven't touched your ice cream," Nash's voice, accompanied by his accent, snaps me out of my trance. "Yeah, I just haven't had lunch yet. I don't want to spoil my appetite," I reason. "Oh, you could have told me," I shake my head, gazing down at the now liquefied ice cream. "It's okay. What's on your mind?" he asks. I hesitate to answer, opening my mouth but failing to produce any words. The cycle continues—open, close, open, close. No words emerge. It wasn't this difficult with Nash before. Before. This is now, the present.

"You seem uncomfortable, don't you?" Is it that obvious? Of course it is. "I'm sorry," I apologize as if my discomfort is my fault. Maybe it is. Nash shakes his head, offering reassurance. "No worries, I should be the one apologizing. I shouldn't have surprised you like that. A little warning would have been considerate," Even if there had been a warning, it wouldn't have made a difference. I would have disregarded it. I would have ran away, as I always do.

"He visited you, didn't he?" Nash inquires, causing me to raise my head and meet his gaze. "The Hawthornes do love their surprise visits, huh?" I joke and he chuckles. I'm not sure if I should miss the sound of his laughter. Silence envelops us once more. No words exchanged, just the two of us sitting in silence.

Until Nash breaks the silence. "I'm not angry at you for leaving. None of us are," Nash assures me. Lies. "If you think that will persuade me to return, you're making a pathetic attempt," I retort. Nash shakes his head and reaches for my hand, resting on the table, but I swiftly withdraw it before his touch can make contact.

"Please, don't touch me, Nash."

His hand retreats to his side of the table, perhaps realizing that his touch wouldn't offer any solace. Not like it used to. "I didn't mean to bring it up," he says, and I scoff in response. "Then you shouldn't have broached the subject," I reply. The jingle of the shop's doorbell signals someone's arrival or departure. "Verity!" a high-pitched voice calls out, instantly recognizable.

"I received your text— Oh! H-hi! Verity, you could have mentioned you were on a date," Asnid whispers the last part as she sits down beside me. Nash snorts, clearly having overheard her. "He's not a date of mine," I clarify. "Verity is not my type, unfortunately," Nash adds.

"Oh! I'm sorry if I interrupted an important conversation. I just got worried about you, Vers. I thought you were kidnapped," Asnid says. "Knowing Verity, you should be concerned that the kidnapper is the one being held hostage," Nash jokes. Asnid giggles and nods in agreement. "That's true," she concurs.

I observe their interaction, feeling a surge of jealousy rising within me. I suppress it, concealing my emotions. "I believe we haven't been formally introduced. I'm Nash," Nash extends his hand, introducing himself. I watch as Asnid extends her hand and shakes his. "Asnid, Verity's roommate and best friend," best friend. The term evokes unwelcome memories.

"Promise me I'll be your best friend forever?"

"I promise!" A broken promise.

"Nash's grandfather passed away, and I need to go with him for the will's reading," I cut to the chase and inform her. "I'm sorry for your loss, Nash. When are you leaving?" Asnid asks.

"Tomorrow—"

"Today—"

Today? I look at Nash, confused. "Tomorrow would be preferable," I interject, leaving no room for negotiation. This isn't up for negotiation. If he wants me to return home, he must adjust to my conditions. My rules.

"Enough time for both of you to pack your belongings," Nash smiles at Asnid. I feel her hand squeeze mine. Hawthornes always have that effect on women. I know because I was once susceptible to their charming smiles. Not Nash's, though.

"She's not coming with us," I refuse to bring Asnid along. I refuse to witness my best friend interacting with the people who inflicted wounds so deep that three years have not been enough to heal them.

"Ignore her. I'm coming with you guys," I attempt to change her mind, but Asnid glares at me. She rarely gets angry, but when she does, it's quite intimidating. I can only remain silent and watch them negotiate.

I must look like a child whose mother told them to be quiet while she talks to adults. "I'll book the tickets, then," Asnid says. "I'll cover the expenses. It's the least I can do for the trouble," Nash offers.

A few more details are exchanged, but I struggle to recall them. I find myself captivated by a homeless man playing chess with a brunette on the street. I watch as she defeats him in just five moves. He slumps his shoulders in defeat, and his lips move, likely accusing her of cheating or something of the sort.

"Verity, let's go," I turn my head to Asnid. She and Nash are already standing by the door. I grab my backpack and follow them out of the shop. The ride back home is uneventful. Nash falls silent in the backseat, while Asnid drives alongside me.

The only sound is the music playing on the radio. Suddenly, I find myself back at our apartment, in my room. My suitcase is laid out on my bed, with all my belongings scattered around it.

It's a mess. I can't bring myself to pack anything inside the suitcase. I continue to stare at it. Questions run nonstop in my head. Is this the right decision? Returning there? The place I fought so hard to escape, only to come back?

I place clothes inside the suitcase—undergarments, shirts, pants, socks—only to remove them again. Put them in, take them out. Repeat. A heavy sensation in my chest makes it difficult to breathe. My fingers tremble as I hold onto the sweater Asnid gave me for Christmas last year. I shouldn't be affected by returning there. I shouldn't feel like this. It's been three years. Shouldn't three years be enough?

"I already booked the flights," Asnid opens the door but stops her sentence once she sees the state of my room. "Why are you crying?" She asks, wrapping her arms around me. I didn't even notice that I was crying until she pointed it out. I bury my head into her shirt and let myself sob and cry.

"Let it all out, Vers," Her voice is gentle and soft. Her touch is as gentle as her voice. She runs her fingers through my hair, untangling the knots. Minutes later, I finally calm myself down, but Asnid never stops her calming and gentle touches. My breathing starts to regulate back to normal, and I can think properly now. "Are you okay now?" She asks me, and I nod, feeling myself brush against her now wet shirt. "Do you want me to help you pack?" I nod again.

She waits for me to release myself from the hug before helping me pack. While packing, I can sense that she wants to ask me why I was crying but hesitates to do so. "I just remembered something, Asnid. I'm fine," I assure her as I pack my toiletries in the pouch of my suitcase.

I know she doesn't believe it, but she still chooses not to ask anymore. Even after three years of knowing each other, I have never opened up about what happened before we met. I could never bring myself to talk about it. I wasn't protecting her; I was protecting myself. As soon as the clock hits five, we are done. "I'll go make dinner," Asnid kisses my cheek before leaving my room. With my suitcase packed and the plane tickets already taken care of, I have nothing else to do now. I put on my headphones and play music.

The whole night is a complete blur, even the morning at the airport. The only thing I can remember is Asnid and I meeting up with Nash at the airport. Now, all three of us are sitting in business class, courtesy of Nash. Thank you, Nash.

"I bet the people we're going to meet will be big shots. I hope they aren't those mean rich people," Asnid says. Who's telling her that they are? Oh wait, I should be the one to answer that.

"Don't get your hopes up, Asnid," I tell her. "They might be those rich mean people," Asnid sighs in disappointment. After that, Asnid falls asleep. I never really liked airplanes. They aren't exactly comfortable enough to make me sleep or enjoy the flight. So, as much as possible, I never wanted to fly to places in or out of the country.

A few more uncomfortable hours later, we finally arrive in Texas. Nash helps with carrying our suitcases and loading them into the car. "I'm nervous," Asnid announces, her leg shaking. "Calm down," I say, placing my hand on her knee to stop her from shaking.

The car ride is short and quiet. For the first time on the whole trip, I fell asleep in the car. I guess that's why I thought it was quiet and short. "Verity, you need to wake up, we're here," Nash says, shaking me to wake up. I give him a sleepy nod before rubbing my eyes.

I can feel the luggage being unloaded from the trunk. When my body is awake enough, I decide to get out of the car and help with the luggage.

I take my suitcase and one of Asnid's carry-ons and follow Nash inside. The Hawthorne House. Where most of my happiest and worst memories were created. I feel a swirling feeling in my stomach. I hate it. This place makes me remember all the memories I want to forget. Every corner of this place is haunted by memories. From the gates to the rooms. The stairs, the gardens, the portrait, and the ceilings. All haunted by a memory, not even 3 years, could make me forget.

"Home already, Nash?" I hear someone ask. The voice is familiar. I raise my head and see a tall man in front of us. 6'0? 6'2? "Hi, Xan," His face is no longer filled with confusion but with happiness and surprise. "Verity!" He runs towards me and wraps his arms around my small figure. He has to crouch down a bit to reach my small height. "You're taller now," I tell him once he has placed me down on the floor. "And you've shrunk!" He is still cheerful.

"Hey!" I protest and smack him on the arm. "No hugs for me?" I look to the side and see Jameson. I open my arms, and he happily walks over to me and spins me around. "Jamie!"

"What's going on?"

Jameson places me down on the floor. I feel my smile falter when I see who the owner of the voice is. Grayson Hawthorne.

He looks the same. Tall, blonde, with piercing, cold eyes that could make you do whatever he wants you to do. The same eyes I once fell in love with. Maybe still in love with.

"Hi, Gray," I send him a small smile but receive nothing back. Nothing but hatred and anger swirling in his grey eyes. "What are you doing here?"

[alyshiba]

What are your thoughts on dain?. I’ve heard RY said she’s a dain apologist and he got better in IF so i’m afraid he might be a li in the upcoming books

Dain is a very complicated character. Spoilers for IF under the cut, as always

My mind has not settled entirely on one opinion. If I have to look at the books, and just take what's written as facts, without thiking that he may be a turncloack or a spy.. then I would say that he's just like Violet. He was born in a high raking military family, he's surely had his differeces with his parents as any child, but, like Violet, he never even once believed he was being lied to by his parent on the reality of the world situation. He thought, like Violet, that (aside from whatever opinions they had of their military parent) what he heard in battle brief, or from said parent, was the truth. End of the story.

Then your best friend, whom you've known since you were a child -and with which you're in love-, starts to get close to public-enemy-1, child of the big villain who killed her brother and tried to murder everyone (again, that's what everyone but the marked one know for a fact), you know he' wi'll try to kill her for her parentage (and Xaden thought it, from his POVS in FW -even thought he already made a pact with Lillith, which only these two knew about-) yet she doesn't listen, and you find out she's activelly betraing her country (and braking his beloved rules) to aid the same rebellion fought off by your parents 6 years ago.

What would you do if you were him?

I'd believe my father, the one who's always given me proofs (we know their forged, he doesn't) rather than, again, the child of the biggest Villain my country has faced in recent centuries and his followers.

So just the fact that he changed sides when shown that his father was the one who lied to his his entire life, is a huge thing. He's had the same arc as Violet.

I personally tend to think that he is actually a good guy, that he's really changed. Yet he betrayed Violet once, and rule-loving-Dain might do it again.

Anyhow, considering how in love Violet is with Xaden, and how still angry she is with Dain (she blaims him for Liam's death, which she has not processed yet) I don't think thare is a chance of them getting together. Plus Rebecca saied in the Verity interview that she doesn't like love triangles.

[infinitedilf]

∘°∘♡∘°∘ Worlds Collide: Esmary ∘°∘♡∘°∘

Prev | Next | Masterlist

"You're fucking kidding me!" I snapped. "We're in the middle of a fucking war and you want me to go make friends with Serphenda! Did you forget that we are, i don't know, in the middle of a fucking war!" What the fuck were these old bags of flesh and bone thinking, war means other countries are bad not friends.

"Miss L/N, if you could please consider." One of them started, his name was Sir Gideon Ford, he was the biggest ass kisser I've ever seen and yet here he is going against my will. "They want Amethyst, we need a bigger verity of food. If we make allies we can both get what we want"

"And then when we relax they'll attack!"

"Not if you sign the goddamn papers girl" There she goes Lady Hellena Ox, she's as strict as a religious school teacher. Old and wrinkled, I'm surprised she's still alive, she is as old as Esmary itself. "If you sign the papers they will have no rights to attack us"

"Oh yes of course, some paper with my signature on it will stop them from attacking"

"Lady L/N, your father wouldn't be impressed with this!"

"Fuck my father! It's not like he gave me this role!" He didn't give me the status of general, I earned it from the beginning.

This country is a broken one, society divided by money status. The bottom of the cliffs were the poor, constantly scrambling to get food, sickness everywhere you turn. In the cliffs we're the middle class, not rich enough to build a house so they dug into the cliffs for shelter, the area is beautiful but not the best. Finally the top of the cliffs, houses and stores litter the streets, the pathways were made of amethyst and gold. To get a job in this country your either born on the top or you fake it, I fortunately was born on the top although that isn't how I got here in the first place.

I thought for a moment, if we make friends with these people, not only will be have access to more food but we will have someone to fight with us if we are ever attacked. This could be a big benefit, more food for the poor and a higher chance of getting a job for the middle. "Fine, I set foot tomorrow at dawn" I sighed, this will either be a disaster or the birth of something amazing. Turning to leave the dimmed building.

I've spent years giving the military of this nation a good name, if you were to look at the library you would see how horrible we were and I don't mean we were weak. Yet when I look at the scenery around me -the sun at its peak, glorious light shining it's way onto the golden path and sparking into many other directions- I can't help but feel hatred, toward this country and some of its people. We didn't have huge castles covered in diamonds or marble, we had simple houses and shops, our people either lived in a cave or a building. I regret ever being born in this country.

storming my way down the weaved path and gliding down the flights stairs, to get to the mid section of the cliffs. Heading towards that creepy ass library, I needed to research these people before i confront them. Attempting to find the section of the library where they stored all the books about this world and it's people, having that eerie feeling I always get when here. I find one called 'The Water People', which as racist as the title is, it's the only book about them here.

[The water people, their main culture is food. Their diets mainly consist of seafood due to majority of produce coming from the vast majority of their land being lakes, ponds and rivers. They aren't very hostile however due to their 'kindness' towards others, many have been assassinated due to their guard being let down. Mannerisms such as being invited to eat, being overly loud and, being excellent swimmers were found while doing research. The weaponry they posses is quite unique, swords with a shell like look, arrows made of spines from one of their aquatic creatures and their amour is made of a rare form of metal that only they posses. Now for the sexual organs.]

I slammed the book shut, I was here to negotiate not fuck one of them. Who knew a book that was about three hundred years old could be so... explicit, thanks Alissa Ragenvar for the trauma. Deciding to leave the cursed library, I started my stroll home.

I've always enjoyed the view of our cave based home - despite hating the country itself - it's hard to believe that centuries ago our ancestors found this ravine and cut out holes into the edges to make homes. Over time vines and greenery grew and now the walls of our home is covered in beautiful flowers and fireflies, the luminescence of the moon mixing with the lighting of the lanterns perfectly.

Stepping foot onto the wobbly and uneven bridge that connects the leisure centre to one of the residential areas, I grip the weathered ropes as I cautiously cross the bridge. If only the upper levels gave a crap about how dangerous it was to cross these bridges in order to get places. Children cross these bridges alone to get to the education centre and yet there's holes big enough for kids to fall through. Unfortunately the middle class residents couldn't afford the rope or wood, having the only place to get it being too expensive.

I step foot off of the bridge, and travel through the caved path as I travel to my cave. Once I'm at my dear home I strip myself of my armour and head for the bathroom, running the water I prepare my bathing supplies. Setting myself down in the bath tub I start to think of how I will introduce myself to the people of Serphenda, especially their leader, Sir Taishiro Toyomistu also known as Fat Gum. If that book is correct, they should be friendly, if it's not then I'm screwed.

Finishing washing myself I dress and then prepare for the early rise. I pack my travelling  kit before I turn to my bed and lay to sleep.

[ilikereadingactually]

looking back, because libraries taught me about assessment

imo reading is NOT about quantity, and NOT always about quality. reading is about the pleasure it brings, and that's it! there's no reason to feel shame about what or how much you read, if you are enjoying yourself. that said, for me, i can see the place reading has had in my life changing by looking back at lists of what i read. over the last decade, my pleasure reading decreased by 93%, and the last three years were the lowest (gee, i wonder why). but i did read some really excellent books in those three low years, and i want to start this blog with a shoutout to them before i dig into what i've been reading in 2023.

this is a long post, so here's what you'll find below the cut:

Uprooted and Spinning Silver by Naomi Novik

The Ascendant Trilogy by K. Arsenault Rivera

The Pearl Thief by Elizabeth Wein

Binti by Nnedi Okorafor

The Tensorate Series by Neon Yang

When You Trap a Tiger by Tae Keller

The Mushroom at the End of the World by Anna Lowenhaupt Tsing

Klara and the Sun by Kazuo Ishiguro

The Book of Boy by Catherine Murdock

The Scholomance Series by Naomi Novik

Judas by Jeff Loveness and Jakub Rebelka

The Locked Tomb Series by Tamsyn Muir

Uprooted and Spinning Silver by Naomi Novik

absolute standouts in the wide field of fairy- and folktale retellings. though i list them together here, they're standalone books that feel connected to me by virtue of style. both feel timeless and a little bit dreamy even as they are rooted in solid, practical, sturdy detail. both pull from Eastern European (and in the case of Spinning Silver specifically, Jewish) folklore and culture. both subvert the story you think you're getting several times before the end, in ways that delighted me. try them if you're into folk magic, women getting things done, and compelling ensemble casts.

The Ascendant Trilogy: The Tiger's Daughter, The Phoenix Empress, and The Warrior Moon by K. Arsenault Rivera

the SCALE of these books! and the STAKES!! i started reading the first one on a whim while i was sitting in the sff section of a bookstore waiting for my friends to be done chatting, and i had to go back to the counter and buy it so i could keep reading it. this is an East Asian-inspired fantasy world, which is always refreshing to me, though there were one or two aspects of the worldbuilding that i bumped on as being on the line between in-universe fantasy racism and real-world racism. i'm not from or deeply educated on any of the source cultures involved, so take that with a grain of salt. but oh, these lesbians live in my heart. i still think about Shefali and Shizuka and their epic, bittersweet story on the reg. THEY'RE TWO PINE NEEDLES, OKAY? T^T try them if you're into queers saying fuck homophobia, horse girls and flower girls, fated/doomed-ish love, fantasy politics, or cliffhangers.

The Pearl Thief by Elizabeth Wein

taken on its own, this is a charming and thrilling mystery story filled with fantastic characters, and it glitters in my mind like sunlight on water. i adore Elizabeth Wein and everything she writes. but i was a little nervous to actually read this book, not out of any fear for its quality, but fear for my emotional state. this is a prequel to Code Name Verity, one of my favorite books of all time, and also the book that has absolutely wrecked me the hardest. i don't think i will ever be able to reread that book. i read it when it came out in 2012, and i STILL can't actually think about it without crying, i am crying as i type this. i have never been so devastated by a piece of fiction, and i was worried The Pearl Thief was going to be hard as a result. and it was, kind of! but also felt nostalgic and kind of sweet to me in a way i wasn't expecting. so! if you read Code Name Verity, read this! if you didn't read Code Name Verity and you have the fortitude for a gorgeous and compelling and tragic and horrifying WWII story about two best friends, read that one first. if you don't have the fortitude for that and never expect to, The Pearl Thief is worth reading on its own. try it if you like historical mysteries, the Scottish countryside, or possibly unreliable narrators.

Binti by Nnedi Okorafor

compact and so beautiful! the kind of science fiction that is so grounded in the emotional struggle of real life that it makes even the most fantastic elements seem real too. Binti comes from a culture based on the Himba people, and her struggle to both break away from her culture and to retain it in her life is extremely compelling and pays off in such satisfying ways. and the sensory details of this book have stayed with me for YEARS! there are some horror elements too, which are sometimes my thing and sometimes not, but in this book they were pitch perfect. i have the complete series in my tbr pile next to my bed, i am so looking forward to reading the rest this year. try this if you like the terror of space, interspecies bonding, Africanfuturism, or defying restrictive systems.

The Tensorate Series: The Black Tides of Heaven, The Red Threads of Fortune, The Descent of Monsters, and Ascent to Godhood by Neon Yang

i'm so pleased that these novellas are all together in one volume now, because they're so so good and one at a time doesn't feel like enough, it's like eating one piece of popcorn at a time. NO! I WANT A FISTFUL! another East Asian-flavored fantasy (i like those, can you tell?) full of really fascinating magic and terrible politics and monsters and people doing gender in cool ways and romance and tragedy and an ensemble cast of characters who were each distinct and delightful to me. i'm SUPER eager to read Neon Yang's newest book, The Genesis of Misery, it's on my list for this year. try Tensorate if you're into unique magic systems, gender fuckery, twins, prophetic visions, or social and emotional struggle that pays off.

When You Trap a Tiger by Tae Keller

this book won the Newbery in 2021 (an extremely well-deserved recognition) and entered my life at a time when i was still working "temporarily" from home, and i have a distinct memory of reading it while riding my stationary bike, and just weeping so hard i had to cut my workout short. an extremely lovely, family-centered story made magical by Korean folktale elements, giving it a pleasing feeling of cuddling up at home when it's stormy outside; there's danger and fear and thrill but also safety and love. Try this one if you've been waiting all your life for magic to happen to you but are a little afraid of what you would do if it did, had a grandma you loved, or if you're into tigers.

The Mushroom at the End of the World: On the Possibility of Life in Capitalist Ruins by Anna Lowenhaupt Tsing

i don't read much nonfiction because i find it a lot harder to focus on, but this book was really fascinating!! this is exactly what i always want nonfiction to be: presented in an order that builds my understanding, with stories and anecdotes and narrative elements to hold my wandering attention interspersed with just really interesting information and theory. i can't restate the arguments in detail anymore, but the tl;dr stuck with me: that as much as humans impact the environment around us in bad ways, we also create new opportunities for nature in our wake. it gives the sense that there are ways forward through the irreparable alterations humankind have wrought on the earth, and that in fact finding those ways forward might be the only way to coexist. it's a really interesting take on the future of the earth, when that topic is so on my and many minds. try it if you are into mushrooms, the venn diagram where ecology meets capitalism, or worry about our and the earth's survival.

Klara and the Sun by Kazuo Ishiguro

GOSH this book was right up my alley!! really beautifully written, a small contained story that was at the same time incredibly broad in its questions, a tightly limited pov, just charming and wonderful and sad. i love many flavors of sad books, and this one was a hopeful sad, a gentle sad. i cried a lot! i loved Klara so much, really felt for her and with her, and rolled around in all the complicated and chewy implications of her presence and consciousness and personhood. also somehow though i own several of his books, i had not yet read any Ishiguro, and this one really confirmed for me that i should get back to those other ones i've been holding on to in my tbr. try this if you're into existential quandaries, dramatic irony, the implications of artificial intelligence, or sweet cinnamon rolls too pure for this world.

The Book of Boy by Catherine Gilbert Murdock

ok listen. i was a Catholic teen, and the bits of that i have hung onto are a love for the aesthetics, the music, and the lore. so this book DELIGHTED me. what could be more fun than a sweet kid who can talk to animals going on a quest with a mysterious pilgrim to steal relics of St. Peter? what i did not expect was to be so cleverly led, and to straight up burst into tears when the suspicion i'd been harboring finally paid off. i love a book with a reveal!!! i love a book filled with charming heresy! i love a medieval setting! i love a mysterious prickly character who is soft inside! what a delight. try this one if you also love any of those things.

The Scholomance Series: A Deadly Education, The Last Graduate, and The Golden Enclaves by Naomi Novik

this is where i put my bookseller hat on, because these books are not precisely my thing, but i can easily see whose thing they are, and also they're good!! Naomi Novik is back at it again with the white vans. she just has a way of writing that keeps me in it, even when she's not writing for my tastes specifically. there are many fun and familiar elements here, with interesting twists and perspectives to keep it fresh. love a mean and cranky narrator, love to see characters building ride-or-die friendships, love a magic school story. i had some trouble in between the second and third books, i felt a bit like she had written herself into a corner regarding the magical world outside the school and i wasn't sure how she was going to get out of it, but the third book did most of the work i wanted it to do. try these if you are into het romantic storylines, school stories, scholarly magic, the younger generation changing the world, or you like reveals to confirm all your strong suspicions rather than blow your brain up.

Judas by Jeff Loveness and Jakub Rebelka

hell yes, we're harrowing hell. this graphic novel is everything i love, stunning art, subtle writing, angst, and turning maybe the most well-established story in Western culture around like a prism to see other angles. "maybe Judas got screwed" isn't a new perspective, but it's one i could see represented again and again and never get tired of it. i stared, i cried, i drank it in. try this if you like comics, you've ever shipped Jesus/Judas or were a Godspell or Jesus Christ Superstar kid, or you're into interesting visions of the landscape of Hell.

The Locked Tomb Series: Gideon the Ninth, Harrow the Ninth, and Nona the Ninth by Tamsyn Muir

MY CURRENT FAVORITE BOOKS OF ALL TIME, likely to stay in my top ten forever!!!!!! what can i even say about these books. they're wild and twisty, funny and devastating, clever and super readable to me. i understand in a general way that they are not for everyone, but they are SO VERY MUCH for me. queer space catholics with magic and swords, huge ensemble cast, a world that gets bigger and weirder and closer as you go. these are books that are stunners on the first read, but continue to hold up on the second, and third, and fourth, and keep revealing new layers of foreshadowing and reference and allegory. i think to some folks they come off as pretentious or tryhard, but they don't read that way AT ALL to me. these books are my weirdo friends that i would tuck in bed with me at night if they were a little less likely to papercut me in my sleep. i am already planning to have some of the many beautiful words in these books tattooed on my body. i am in a constant state of high frequency vibration awaiting the fourth and final book of the series. try these if you're looking for something very fresh and you're willing to go with the flow, if you like a million incredible twists and lots of depressed and unstable women and plots that resist "typical" relationship storylines, if you're queer and you want to see a world with 99 problems but homophobia doesn't exist, if you're aspec, if you like a little horror and a little suffering, if you enjoy Kiwi slang...honestly just try them, and if you don't dig the first 10-20 pages of Gideon then maybe it's not for you but if you DO then you won't be able to put it down anyway. OH! and the audiobooks are spectacular too!!

[switchyftm]

19, 34, 37, 61, and 98

19. What underwear would you like to buy/be gifted?

(pics welcome)

Eerrmm I don’t know honestly, I don’t massively care too much as long as they’re comfortable hah.

34. Do you like dirty talk? What names do you like calling/being called by?

I enjoy a verity of names hah, depends if I’m sub or dom honestly. I enjoy daddy and sir when dom, like using names such as pup, doll, princess, stuff like that for my partners. When I’m sub I enjoy calling my partner daddy/mommy, and they call me pup, sweetheart, sweet boy. I like all of those.

37. Do you enjoy receiving/inflicting pain? How strong?

I do enjoy giving, when dom I can lean quite sadistic. Receiving I’m still experimenting with, however I’m realising I like it a bit more than I expected hah

61. Have you ever worn a toy in public?

I have indeed, I’d like to do it more.

98. Do you have many kinky friends? Do your friends now you're kinky?

My best friend is also very kinky and we can have open talks with each other. Always down for more people to dm my if you want more kinky friends haha

[ravenwolf1132]

That's fair. I can see the appeal for Polnareff being an Aphrodite kid, I was actually thinking that myself before settling on Athena. You're right, he is a ladies man, but I see him more as the type to hit on the Aphrodite kids and that would just be weird if he was his their brother. Also the fact that he's not strategically oriented is comedic irony to me, like he's more like his battle oriented Ares cousins than his own Athena siblings XD

As for Kakyoin, I was actually thinking Athena at first before I thought, "actually let's make him something else, have a little verity." Hades is definitely an idea, though I thought he was just Lord of the Underworld. I can see it though.

(Yess, wagging tail. Happy little fox boi with his Greek fam)

For me, my version is based on the "Jotaro and Percy are half siblings" thing, that was the whole appeal for which made my mind go BRRRRR. So, the Jojo timeline has been pushed up to meet the time when Percy gets to CHB and the Egypt trip takes place in between Lightning Thief and Sea Of Monsters - so sea of monsters is now pushed up as well.

To be honest, I was thinking of giving Polnareff the Sokka Treatment. He's brash and hot-headed, but still honor bound - just look at his fight with Avdol. He's sees himself as responsible for his little sister and others close to him, like when Avdol almost got killed the first time or the Anubis fight when he personally almost killed Jotaro. No doubt he felt responsible for his friends getting hurt. And just look at his Stand, Silver Chariot is this fast and precise killing machine that can go toe to toe with fucking Star Platinum. On that note, other than Kakyoin, Polnareff is Jotaro's best friend. Have you seen the scenes they're in together? Bromance material, my guy, and a parallel for Percy and Annabeth.

In ATLA, Sokka sees himself as the man of the village, the one to protect his little sister, and on some level feels guilty that his mother is gone. But Sokka goes through some phenomenal character growth, going from this brash and hot-headed - like Polnareff - teenager, into the leader we all know and love. Suki humbles Sokka's ass so hard he not only has the sexism beaten out of him but is actually willing to learn and grow.

Give that treatment to Polnareff so he can grow and change in a way that he doesn't lose his legs (looking at you, part 5 Polnareff). Polnareff shows up in CHB as a young teen like other demigods, and when he gets there he's humbled within days. Give him insecurity for not being like his siblings so he over compensates by honing and sharpening his swordfighting skills and putting himself at this impossible standard. When Sherry dies, he's furious, not just at his sister's murderer but at himself as well for not being able to protect her. When he comes back to the camp, for once he throws himself into study like an actual Athena Kid and starts taking stuff a lot more seriously. The news that he's lost his sister spreads quick, the Athena kids pitch in to help him study, the Hermes kids try to cheer him up but also cut back on the pranks, the Hephaestus kids make him a new sword as a gift.

Then this new kid shows his face and shakes things up because he's a Poseidon kid. He makes this huge first impression and a hell of a reputation. Takes no shit from anyone, strong as hell both physically and power wise to the point he can cause earthquakes (Poseidon is a God of earthquakes too, not just the sea), has absolutely no interest in the Aphrodite kids much to their frustration because this kid is gorgeous. And almost the moment they meet, Polnareff and Jotaro have a rivalry.

Eventually, things come to a head while on a mission; "You have no idea what it feels like to lose someone you love!" "Well at least you HAVE siblings!" But on the mission, they work out their rivalry like "why are we even fighting to begin with?" Maybe one of them saves the other's life or does something that earns the other's respect, and they become close friends afterwards.

Just... can you tell I love Jotaro and Polnareff's relationship? Bros...

When Kakyoin shows up, Polnareff basically just goes "mine now :D" and the three of them become an inseparable trio.

One of my favourite character tropes:

Character: I don't care if the world explodes, not like there's anything worth saving it

*Mom gets hurt due to the end of the world plot*

Also character: WHO MUST I KILL?!

[egoburned-arc]

tag dump !

[autumnklare]

thoughts about verity

Hey. Welcome to another session of talking to myself via this application. Do people still use this app? Well, I hope they do because this is the only app that I use where I am free to talk about stuff my friends don't usually care about.

For a second there, I thought I have lost this one because It has been awhile since I opened this app, and the main reason why I remembered that I have one was after I went back to reading.

First of all, I would like to thank the booktok community for always rummaging my tiktok feed and encouraging me to buy books I know I will never read--unless there's a storm and electricity's out and I have nothing else to do but read. But, that is of course a joke because as you all know (you don't), I am a literature major and it is part of my daily life to read (but not my preferred novels anyway!)

NOW, Verity is a book by my favorite author, Ms. Colleen Hoover whom I personally love and adore ever since I started reading her works, she literally was the one who save me from my years of reading slump jeez. The first book that I read from her was All Your Perfects which became my ultimate favorite, no one touch me I'm still crying whenever someone mentions me that book.

However, Verity pulled me from the dead and called me to read her so I did. If you haven't read the book and you're still here reading my random rants please get out because the next parts may contain spoilers!

SPOILERS AHEAD

The book began with Laura (i am not sure anymore?? I am so bad at remembering names) her mother just died from cancer, and she's off to continue her life after nursing her for how many months. Everything feels surreal after her first steps back from the outside world, but, she was offered a job, a proposal, in which she decided to attend to. Upon her way, she met this dashing man who swept her by her feet. (Well, he's handsome and he gave you his shirt) only to find out that the man will be his boss.

She was assigned/ chosen to continue the book of his wife, Verity which is a best-selling author because apparently she mastered the art of story-telling through the lens of the antagonists. Verity was in a car accident in which resulted to becoming her being brain dead, she could no longer finish her book so they had to hire a 'ghost-writer' or co-writer to finish the book. Well, our main character here was convinced upon a few kicks and push as the offer was huge and can help her continue her life.

So, Laura proceeded. She was invited to Verity's house so that she could do her research, read Verity's previous series, and look for footnotes, journals, everything that can help her continue the stories, but upon investigating, a very special manuscript landed her eyes--it was Verity's autobiography.

At first, Low felt that it was too personal to read, but she later on convinced herself that it might help her write, to read what's on Verity's mind, so she did. The manuscript contained everything that she need to completely freak out and question her position in that house. "WHO THE FUCK IS THIS BITCH AND WHY DOES SHE THINK LIKE THIS?" that kind of level.

Bitch when I was reading the book, YOU HAVE NO IDEA ABOUT THE NUMBER OF TIMES I YELLED AT HER TO FUCKING QUIT, because If I was her, the moment that Verity stared at me from a far, from her room through the window, I would have packed my bags immediately and run. I swear.

The manuscript contained how Verity met her husband Jeremy, how their relationship revolved around sex, and how they can't get their hands off each other. She was obsessed. Until she got pregnant and how she did everything to kill those kids because she never wanted them in the first place, she was obsessed to the fact that she was too afraid that her husband's attention will focused on their children (which is the obvious thing to do, duh). But like I've said, the bitch was crazy. She never loved anyone else except her husband.

I think the scene that traumatized me the most was when she tried to kill Harper, one of the twins, how she fucking shoved her fingers inside that baby's mouth--that I'm still fucking picturing up to this day because it literally broke my heart, poor Harper and Chastin.

But, I think I have lost my mind when she finally confessed in her manuscript that she purposely planned to kill Harper at the lake. The way she fucking whispered to Crew to hold his breath as she knew the canoe will turn backward. She left Harper there to die.

You guys have no idea how my mind cried when both of her twins died and all she could fucking think was why her husband's not fucking her anymore, like bitch. You need therapy.

Well, eventually, Jeremy finally found out about the truth and killed her for killing Harper. (I'm not going to lie but I was opposed to that idea, but okay..) anyway, moving on because I am already tired from typing this and I'm doing my best to shortcut the story since it is only I that will be reading this anyway and I'm just looking for excuses to rant my thoughts.

A few months after Verity died, Low found out that she was pregnant with Jeremy, but they had to go back to Verity's house first as Jeremy finally decided to sell the property, and now they are just there to gather up a few more of his remaining things to finally start their new life.

Crew have said something to Low that made her look. Low fiugured that there is a hidden cabinet on the floor where Verity used to hide her knife, and it was a letter-- addressed to Jeremy. In that letter she said that the manuscript is not true, and it was just a exercise that was given to her by her publisher so that she could continue writing her stories on the same perspectives. When Low read that, guilt swallowed her completely as she knew that they killed her. But still, she decided to throw that shit up because she knew it will destroy her growing family.

ALRIGHT ALRIGHT HERE IS MY FINAL RANT.

At first, I don't know which side I should take because that motherfucking manuscript was detailed and shocking. The details the she put in was extraordinary, Verity is really good at painting characters in a bad light, which is perfect for her as like I've said, she writes book in the perspective.

I am mindblown with the idea of how obsessed she is to her husband, how she fucking hated being pregnant, how she tried killing her babies when they were still inside her, and how she tried to kill Harper after having a nightmare.

I am so heartbroken for her twins, when she decided to favor only Chastin and ignored Harper all her life, I am devastated of how she only cares about sex, and to please Jeremy when in fact that wasn't even Jeremy wanted-- her husband wanted to build a connection, a life, a communication, a language in which both of them can only understand, but instead, she was just focused on the idea of giving pleasure-- that's all she knows.

Now, that letter. I know for a fact that she only wrote that letter because first of all, she was not brain dead, she did that because she thought her husband can take care of her after finally losing the twins, she did that because she watched how her husband fell in love with a new woman inside her house, how he fucked her knowing she was upstairs-- she did the letter because it was her only way out.

She knew that Low will be the one to find the letter, because she knew how anxious Low was in the first place, how Low discovered Crew holding that knife in her bed, how she fucking searched that knife but it suddenly disappeared. She knew that Low knows that she's alive and okay.

That was her way of revenge, tormenting, manipulating and guilt-tripping Low even if she's already dead. Because how will that fucking letter defend the fact that Crew was so scared to talk bout Verity in front of Low that he fucking bit the knife which caused for his mouth to bleed, because Crew was too afraid that he'll get punished. And don't get me started to the bruise on Chastin's cheek.

In the end, I am no longer neutral, I am proud that I am team manuscript, good night.

[sergeant-spoons]

C, F, H and T 🥰😘

Ask game linked here (it won’t show up on my blog, for some reason, and a chance to link to @mercurygray’s wonderful profile is always a plus - go read her work!).

C: What member do you identify with most?

Hmmm—that’s a hard one! I think, in a way, that my OCs all derive from a part of my own personality. Their core traits tend to be the traits I wish I could amplify in myself. So I suppose it’s fair to say that I identify with Phyllis Dotson’s love of baking and want for a family just as much as I identify with Verity Rich’s mom-friend instincts and introvertedness. The same goes for Harley Gibbs’ independence, Judy Hartmann’s love of writing (no surprises there, I bet), Leslie Sheppard’s die-hard loyalty; the list goes on.

F: Share a snippet from one of your favorite dialogue scenes you’ve written and explain why you’re proud of it.

This one took me a while to figure out. I think my favorite dialogue scenes are from this one shot—From May to June—this other one shot—There’s A Fine, Fine Line—and this scene in In Defense of Chicanery—Chapter 36.

For From May to June and There’s A Fine, Fine Line: I think these two pieces are some of the best characterizations I’ve done with George Luz and Bill Guarnere respectively. 

Ex (From May to June):

“I love that laugh.”

“Mine?”

He snorts.

“No, General Taylor’s.”

and (There’s A Fine, Fine Line)

Powler seems about to correct him, then decides it's not worth it.

"No. You're not sleeping there."

"Ain't ya choice, Miss-"

"If it's too small for me it's much too small for you," she argues before he can think of an applicable epitaph other than 'Gorgeous'.

"Are you callin' me fat?" He knows she isn't, but he thinks it will make her squirm, and he's right.

And from IDOC:

“Huh!” Skip waved, smirking with his usual cheer and charm. “Consider us blessed. Hey, Victor Rich, over there, huddlin’ up to Doc- not so lucky. Got knicked in the ear by a bullet from the heavens above.” 

Skip cupped his hands around his mouth as if Verity could no longer hear him quite so well. 

“How’s that old thing healin’ up, you poor martyr?”

She mustered an empty chuckle for his sake, consoled just enough by Gene’s distant warmth pressed against her side.

“Well, I can still hear, so not as hole-y as you think.”

For this ^^ excerpt, it was (and remains) one of my favorite scenes to write. This is the wounded list scene with Skip, Lipton, Popeye, Liebgott, Guarnere, and the rest of Easy in Bastogne right after Joe Toye returns from the aid station. The scene in the show is a breath of fresh air in the middle of a very difficult and damaging situation—writing it in IDOC felt very much the same.

Also, I love this bit, a little earlier in the scene...

“Perry Bloom over there,” he [Skip] announced, “got his fingers nipped at by the winter, but he’s got a mean left hook, so he fended off the freeze alright.”

“I taught him that,” Toye cut in, and Perry nodded along gladly, sharing a glance with Toye that made Verity shrink slightly into her scarf. They were being a bit bold, weren’t they? Then again, what she wouldn’t give for the chance to express warmth and seek comfort without having to hide it all the damn time.

...because it is one of very few moments in which we get to see Toye and Perry’s blossoming relationship.

H: How would you describe your style?

I think the biggest thing I would identify with my style is the habit I have of using actions between dialogue more often than dialogue tags (or, similarly, using a dialogue tag with an action attached). My ADHD leads me to pay attention to whatever a person is doing while they are speaking (if I am physically present with them) and something I have noticed is that there is very rarely stagnancy in a natural conversation/situation. Life is full of motion. Even the most minute actions—like the tapping of a foot, a glance at a passing butterfly, or the flickering of a smile—can add that pinch of realism I’m always looking to put into my writing.

T: Any fandom tropes you can’t stand?

None that I can think of off the top of my head in the Band of Brothers fandom, but in The Hobbit fandom, there is a shocking number of (quick trigger warning) incest fics with the Durins (Thorin, Fili, and Kili), a ‘trope’ which makes me very uncomfy.

Thank you so much for this ask, Francy! ILY, my dear. 🥰💕

[rizaoftheowls]

get to know ur dnd characters: 69 (nice) for all three of them

NICE.

69. How would they describe their party members?

Yashiko (the Ranger/Rogue): "They're all very strange people, but they've grown on me. Kita's probably the best friend I've ever had - and she was always wiser about how the world worked than I ever was.

Willem is incredibly capable. I respect that he took the time to understand our way of life instead of just pushing his own ideology on us, and yet stayed true to his code even when it indicted his own people. A very honorable man.

Junji is...odd, and giving him my trust felt like a mistake at first, but I've never regretted it. He constantly surprises me. He finds so much joy in discovering new experiences - I wish I had the time, and lack of responsibilities, to join him.

Also if you look at any of them funny I will filet you."

Shoshana (the Sorcerer): "These people literally saved my life. I was...in a bad place, and they came along and went NOPE YOU'RE OUR FRIEND NOW LET'S GO DO HEROICS.

Valeria is somehow the actual caricature of an Honorable Paladin, which is kinda insufferable sometimes but is honestly, like - it makes you believe stuff could turn out okay? Which is in short supply in the friggin Cursewood.

Gral thinks he's all emo but he's actually just a levelheaded, friendly guy. It's really good to see him start writing again. He seems a lot happier than he used to, I think having a purpose and some victories has really done him good. The creepy stuff just proves he's a real good actor.

Vigdor needs to stop running head first into danger like it's offering him free candy. Dumbass has a big heart, but apparently used up every last brain cell for medical school. I think maybe he needs a hug though? I'm not great at hugs, I can attempt a noogie at best."

Verity (the Warlock, pre-campaign): "I haven't really seen any of them in years! Shaz is doing well for himself but the last couple times I sent him a letter I just got a form letter back. I suppose that's how fame goes. [Unnamed-as-yet Plasmoid] always sounds like she's having great adventures out there; I'd love to have her over for tea the next time she's on the island, though Hells know it'll make my life more, uh, complicated to get an unvarnished report on overseas politics. Cleverspells? I remember her, that was so long ago! I wonder if she knows the side effects of our little misadventure are still making life, er, complicated..."

[deans-mind-palace]

Masterlist

So, welcome to my master list. It will be updated every few days. Gifs are not mine, they belong to their creator!

Dean Winchester

Ripped at every edge - Dean x Neutral!Reader. After a hunt gone wrong, Sam and Dean fight. As soon as Sam leaves the room you have to pick up the broken pieces of Dean Winchester. Based on ‘Colors’ by Halsey.

Two little letters - Dean x Fem!Reader. With Dean’s help you manage to escape an abusive and unhealthy relationship. You live a happy life until your past catches up with you. A chain of unfortunate coincidences leads to a heartbroken Dean. Will you be able to save your relationship? (requested)

Stitches - Dean x Fem!Reader. Y/N is in love with Dean, unbeknownst to him. During a hunt he saves her and risks his own life. He nearly died and now you have a grumpy, on the floor bleeding hunter sitting on your bed and you are just about to explode. (requested)

Sweet as marshmallows - Dean x Male!Reader. Things get heated between you and the elder hunter after a dangerous Wendigo hunt. (requested)

Icarus - Dean x Reader. You‘re an unworried person who is always optimistic and such a sharp contrast to your secret crush Dean. You have to show Dean that he mustn’t carry the world‘s pain on his own shoulders. Sometimes you just gotta live a little. Skinny dipping is the solution.

Verity - Dean x Neu!Reader. During her last breath, the witch had taken revenge. Things get interesting when Dean’s hit by a truth spell. Unfortunately, it is not easy to hide a secret if you always have to tell the truth. But that doesn't explain why Dean is avoiding you all the time, does it?

Sam Winchester

You’re a hooker, sweetheart - Sam x Reader. You’ve always had a thing for the younger Winchester brother. Ever since you first met Sam and his cute smile. But you were always too afraid of confessing your crush to him. One day he hooks up with a random girl after a hunt. That’s when you’re having it! You’re tired of suppressing. What will Sam have to say? (requested)

Suspirium - Prof!Sam x Fem!Reader. You’re in your last year of your Classics and Modern Languages studies and you’re majoring in Latin and English. Then you get assigned to a different Latin teacher. And damn, he loves his subject. Too bad that he’s also hot. What is just a childish crush soon develops into something way more complicated.

Castiel

That’s the thing with nightmares - Cas x Neutral!Reader. Sweet Castiel comforts you after a terrible nightmare which leads to lots of cuddles.

Heavenly touch - Cas x Fem!Reader. You’re in your last year of high school. But nothing goes according to plan. While your older brothers are hunting demons down you have to attend school in whatever forsaken town they drag you to. You are bullied because you have no boyfriend, no sexual experience and you not even have had your first kiss yet. Dean doesn’t get your problem and Castiel is curious. That won’t end well.

Forget me not - Cas x Fem!Reader series. Cas was your guardian angel and best friend. He protected from everything that tried to harm you as a child. But a terrible accident caused him losing you. Years later, you’re still determined to find your guardian angel again. What happens when you meet him under unexpected circumstances?

Glooming hearts - Cas x Fem!Reader. The one time Dean plays matchmaker for his socially awkward friend and an angel who is just as worse. It’s funny and maybe he gets a lot more involved than he wanted to. Both  have no experience with dating and Dean likes watching how the chaos he caused envolves around him. What could possibly go wrong? (requested)

Conversations in the dark - Cas x Neu!Reader. Nothing’s real if it happens in the dark. That’s what your mother told you about nightmares. But you’re hunter and you know that nightmares exist in the daylight, too. Your relationship with Cas isn’t always easy. However, in moments of doubt it’s good you have each other. Because that’s all that really matters.

Other SPN characters

Another love - John x Fem!Reader. You had a wonderful thing with John Winchester. One night he leaves without coming back. 

Beware of the daddy - John x Fem!Reader. The reader gets drunk in a bar and doesn’t want to be alone at night so she is searching for an one-night stand. She finds a good-looking guy, but suddenly she ends up in a dicey situation. John comes to the rescue. (requested)

SPN Actors

Lullabies - Jensen x Fem!Reader. Jared x Fem!Reader. You're pregnant. Every couple would be happy to hear these news. Don't get me wrong, you're happy. Only problem is you have no idea who the father is... It‘s either Jensen Ackles' baby or the one of Jared Padalecki. The two men don't know about the big news yet. How will they react? Part 2 here. (requested)

Adorkably - Jensen x Neu!Reader. After you had a stunt accident on the Supernatural set, your leg is broken and you have to stay in bed while being on some high painkillers. Good thing, Jensen takes care of you. Well, in his own dork way anyways… (requested)

Nightcrawler - Jensen x Neu!Reader. Jensen and you never got along well. But when a stunt accident almost caused him losing you, everything changes. What will Jensen have to say if you wake up? (requested)

Cloudbursts - Jared x Neu!Reader. You were determined to do it. You never told anyone about your fear and you wouldn’t let it bring you down to your knees now! Not in front of all these people! Well, the anxiety attacks were an obstacle you didn’t think of... (requested)

Rock 'n' Roll, baby - Jensen x Male!Reader. Jensen has always been such a flirt. There has always been a chemistry between you that neither of you can deny. But no-one makes the next step. What is only a flirt for fun soon turns out to be more. (requested)

Love and hair - Jensen x Daughter!Reader x Jared. Part 2 to Lullabies. Set 18 years in the future. Reader wants to know who her biological dad is. (requested)

An apple a day - Doctor!Jensen x Fem!Reader. You were just having a bad day, that’s it. I mean, dislocating an arm while carrying cartons into your new apartment? That could happen to everyone. But intentionally miss three vaccination appointments? That could only happen to you. If only the doctor wasn't so cute... (requested)

Skies are different in Vancouver - Jensen x Neu!Reader. You have a hard time while your finance is in Vancouver for three months. However, you know that Jensen will always return to you in the end. (requested)

Hot as hell heaven - Misha x Neu!Reader. Filming can be quite dangerous sometimes. Good thing you have your personal doctor. (requested)

[literaila]

oh, three? that's pretty young. he can talk? sorry, i don't know how babies work. that's sad. maybe try not taking their candy next time. it is?? wow. that sounds like a really cool name. either ash or asher works.

so do i. of course they aren't. you believe in magic too, huh? they don't exist. i'm sure of it. if we don't anything about other galaxies, how do you know they're real? uh huh.

question. do you prefer mr or ms? or mx? i need to know which one so i can mock you. :)

even strangers. once i saw this really cool person at hot topic with a pretty dress (i think?) or something. i still remember them. never had a stranger compliment me. do i? i always try to act like i have the biggest dick in town. don't think it's working very well.

maybe not. but you're still a good person.

no darling, i'm skilled. it's a talent. i lie about everything for no reason. i don't know why. i'm used to it, though. i think i'm very fake, i have about 30 different personalities

you're a hopeless romantic. no denying it, love. at least you're self aware. give me one movie that's good and sappy. i've never heard of one.

you should give me yours too, y'know. only fair, right? only joking. most are.. weird. i don't know. i swear what i listen to are better than my playlists. you should listen to 'lover is a day' by cuco. it's really good. if you haven't already.

i don't have much coffee. i've never gotten into it. don't go insane with the caffeine, v. have you ever drank monster? do you have a favorite flavor?

thank you. i haven't heard that in a while. seriously, verity. means a lot. i'm glad! do you go in person, or what? i've never really known how therapy works n stuff.

school isn't too bad for me. the only negative bit was a practice quiz. i filled in half of the questions, and got all but 2 wrong. it's okay. i guess. on monday we'll take the same quiz, but i don't wanna get it wrong. it's easy too! i'll study, i just suck at memorizing stuff. continents and oceans, match them and blah blah. probably 4th grade stuff but i'm still bad at it. even if i do bad on monday, it wouldn't make me dumb. right?

sorry for responding late. i went to sleep at like 11 pm yesterday, i was tired. got good rest?

ahh, okay. yes, that makes sense. enjoy the weekend!! hope you feel better now? relax, love. take it easy and do whatever you enjoy the most. right now, i hope you're feeling refreshed and nice. new day, new start. agh, sorry. i don't know what to say. but today will be different, good, hopefully.

(i said hope a lot, huh?)

did you? it's not long at all, but you finished it in a day? i'm glad you liked it! it also has a nice cover. i think my english teacher has another book from mitch albom, so i'll ask about it once i finish twilight. also. i'll read more of it today!

— 🐢

most kids start actually talking from anywhere from 9ish months to 2 years. but, obviously, they can make noise before that. i started talking pretty early as i’m told. he talks extremely well. pfft. i give him candy, if anything. i just don’t see him enough.

it is pretty cool, annoying in school though. ash or asher, got it.

not magic. i wish. honestly, humans can’t be the only living things in the universe. think of how many species are just on earth.

any and all. though i don’t prefer the mocking (yes i do).

technically i’m a stranger, and i think you’re amazing. so there. it’s working very well, i assure you.

have you ever told me a lie? i won’t be offended if you have. you’re not fake if you know that you lie, and if you think you are? clearly, you’re very real.

um, 2005 pride and prejudice. crimson peak. 50 first dates. literally dr strange. the loki series?? they’re all sappy, they’re all good. do you have a favorite movie btw? we’ve discussed shows, but not movies.

i don’t actually use spotify a lot. but maybe i’ll make a playlist and then give you it. it’ll be embarrassingly sappy, i assure you. i like your playlists! i listened to some of them while i finished cleaning last night.

ahahaha i am a caffeine monster. literally. i got absolutely insane with caffeine and then i crash. so i don’t have it too much, don’t want to become addicted and all that. but coffee is the love of my life, anyway. umm i’ve tried a tangy one? i think that’s a flavor? usually i just drink the ones my friend leaves behind. what’s your favorite flavor, maybe i’ll try it.

i used to go fully in person but then covid happened and we switched to online for a while. i go most times now, but sometimes online if my schedule is difficult. if you’ve ever seen therapy in a movie, it’s pretty similar. honestly just more down to earth, less dramatic. at least, for me.

quizzes are literal hell. i hate them, i hate tests. and i’m really bad at taking both. geography sucks, i don’t know anything about it. just that. well. there are seven continents (right?) of course it wouldn’t make you look dumb. you’re very smart.

glad you went to bed then. i slept strangely, and woke up early. i’ll probably sleep more tonight.

went to the store today. bought another blanket (i had four on my bed) and then i have an eye appointment soon. so, better. i do best when i’m busy. which is why i clean so much.

i read really fast. too fast. yes they seem like a really good writer. i’ll look for some more in the library. enjoy twilight!

-v

[worstloki]

I don't know if you're still doing writing prompts but if so I would love to combine my two favorite best friends, Verity and Loki, and Jenna and Julien. Like J&J's kitchen with Loki going fucking nuts while cooking and even tho he never measured everything and always makes a mess the food still comes out great. Verity loves what Loki cooks but just can't handle their vibes

“Welcome to Loki & Verity, our weekly podcast! Today we’re going to be cooking spaghetti and Loki is going to run us through the steps since he’s a genius at cooking basically everything and I NEED to know how that works!”

“Hi, I’m obviously Loki, as you can tell by my effortless charm and good looks, and that amazing lady over there is Verity, and today we’re cooking spaghetti - step one: punch the ingredients for dough until its consistent”

“I’m sorry did you just say punCH-”

“step two: stuff all the dough into this spaghetti cutter and turn it on”

“Don't ignore me this is not correct practise you cant just do it like this the machine will break-”

“It hasn't broken yet so anyways - step three: throw the dough into this pot of water and let it boil for a bit”

“Maybe tell them for how long...?”

“No. Step four: mix together mushed tomato's and any assortments of herbs you want to create a paste and throw it into the pot, personally I use coriander mint parsley thyme and chives”

“Did you just say you put MINT into the sauce??”

“Step five: Once the food looks ready to eat sprinkle some frozen shredded cheese and serve!”

“I have given up. I just don't care anymore. If this is what it takes to make delicious food I don't think I can manage another cooking session. Loki, I think this joint show was a bad idea”

“Verity loves my cooking so I’m not concerned. Anyways guys thanks for watching, see you next week where I’ll be putting together a prawn and cereal pizza!” 

“WAIT YOU’RE TELLING ME YOU PUT CEREAL IN THE PIZZA LAST NIGHT-”