#(they never mention it not working out and it's like a big thing in the final episode. feels like it's not just an experiment. idk)

[luminni]

This is some shit Johnny would say, it just is I'm sorry.

Johnny hates your new boyfriend. It burns in his loins every time you come over and complain about something stupid the git said. So often that now when you take a particularly large sigh, he's immediately asking "fuckin' 'ell, what he do this time eh?"

It hurts even more when you gush about something "good" your boyfriend did, even when it's just the bare minimum. Yeah he open the door for you on a date? Did you know that Johnny would have lifted up the globe had you asked him? Do you have any idea the things he would do if you so much as asked? No you didn't, because he was fairly certain you only saw him as your good friend, as you had been for years.

And Jesus did it infuriate him when you "laughed" your boyfriend's pitiful excuses for a joke. It wasn't your real laughter, it was a kind of controlled giggle. Johnny knew a couple words from him could have you full on belly laughing, gripping onto the nearest surface (usually his arm) to steady yourself. The worst part of it was, the sorry excuse of a man that had wormed his way into your life looked so proud of himself when you gave that fake laugh. Johnny wanted to wipe that grin off his face so bad. But he behaved himself, for you...most of the time, but this is Johnny we're talking about, he's nothing if not petty.

He pretends to like your sorry excuse of a boyfriend in front of you so that you invite him on your dates because you hope they can be friends. Johnny just wants to ruin things

When you make food, Johnny is there. Reminding your boyfriend he would never be the first person to try your recipes.

"Added some pepper since las' time aye lass?"

He then proceeds to taste test form the same spoon as you, side eyeing your "man".

And when you do serve the food, he eats 10x more than he usually does which is saying a lot for him. Just has to mention how many calories he's been burning at the gym lately. Does your boyfriend work out? Oh he doesn't? Hm, interesting.

Also the king of flirty jokes but turns it to 100 when he's around your new boyfriend.

"Jesus, you eat like a horse"

"Aye 's not the only thing about me thas' like a horse"

All said with that shit eating grin he knows pisses your boyfriend off.

Johnny knows this "relationship" (he refuses to believe you actually like the tadger) isn't going to last long anyway. He's the only person who could ever make you truly happy. The only person you'd wait for at the airport every time he got back from deployment. The only person you'd text out of no where at 3am to tell him you were hungry. He just had to help you see it was all and scare off your pathetic partner. If he couldn't manage it, he knew a couple big scary guys that could follow him home at night.

[syoddeye]

sliding scale

You're in need of a handyman. He has needs of his own. cw: discussion of kids/pregnancy, john price inserting himself into your life, heavily implied breeding kink, unsettling and smutless (my brand)

You win the jackpot. Okay. Not the jackpot, but you're hit by a respectable windfall. It's like a cheesy movie you'd watch around the holidays: A distant relative dies, you receive a very serious letter, and suddenly, your account isn't as sad as it once was.

So, you do the impossible. The unthinkable. You buy a house.

An old, well-loved house from an elderly couple.

The day you close, they tell you about raising their kids in the house and mention the names etched on the door frame. When you arrive home that evening, the empty house feels grand and hollow, but there they are, just where they said. Names climbing upward in uneven increments, faded with time, but legible. You trace your finger along the marks, imagining small hands and the measuring tape, the years slipping by. It makes you smile, despite yourself.

You've never wanted kids, not really, but the thought of this, people leaving bits of themselves behind—it makes you mushy. You figure, once the dust settles, you'll let rooms to friends, maybe friends of friends. Start a fun little commune of sorts, a collective of people coming and going.

The first night, you drink nonalcoholic wine straight from the bottle and lie on your mattress on the floor, staring up at the ceiling. There's no furniture yet, just your overnight bag and the smell of fresh paint from a patch you tested on the living room wall. You fall asleep smiling. The house needs a lot of work, but you're not worried. Some TLC and elbow grease can go a long way.

Over the next few weeks, you move in and start working. Anything is possible with the power of YouTube tutorials and the local tool library.

You start in the primary bedroom and bathroom, learning to tile, install flooring, and connect plumbing for the perfect vanity and sink you found at a thrift store. It feels good to learn how things fit together and see the fruits of your labor. At night, you sleep in one of the old kid's rooms. The wallpaper is covered in rockets and planets. A couple of glow-in-the-dark stars cling to the ceiling.

The bathroom comes together wonderfully, and you feel invincible.

But then you get to the kitchen.

After an outlet zaps you, you decide you may be in over your head. That there really is a limit to what one person can do on their own. You start looking up local contractors, but everything is out of your budget. You've been doing all the work yourself for a reason. Then, after digging for ages, you find a promising lead: John Price - Handyman - Sliding Scale.

On the phone, John seems normal. Charming. Funny. He tells you he's impressed you bought a house on your own. (You've heard that a lot lately, and while it feels patronizing, you let it go. You did jump up a band upon inheriting your chunk of Great Uncle Leroy's money.) He agrees to come by and see what he can do.

You have to admit he makes a good impression when he shows up. He's punctual, polite, and looks the part. Broad chest, thick arms, big hands resting on his hips as he surveys the kitchen. After only a few minutes, he says he'll take the job. No hesitation.

You explain your tight budget and that you'll work alongside him when you're not at your day job. You show him the money you've set aside, expecting him to back out, but he just shakes his head and nudges the folder back across the table.

"Said I'd do it. Don't you fret, darl."

You vet him afterward, just to be sure. His references check out. The reviews are solid. He appears to know a little about everything. You text him to confirm, formally offering the job, and he accepts.

On the first day, you let him in and immediately have to avert your eyes. You didn't realize a toolbelt could look like that on someone. His sleeves are rolled up, exposing his forearms, and the way he moves—confident, purposeful—makes you grateful you're heading out to work. You tell him when you'll be back and leave quickly, gripping the steering wheel tighter than usual thinking about the hunk of man in your house.

When you return, the kitchen looks different, unfinished, but vastly improved. John's already fixed things you didn't think could be fixed. Over lunch, he even scoped out other problems around the house: a crack in the basement wall, a loose board on the stairs, and spots where the flooring must be replaced. He gushes about the house, praising its character, the way it's held up over time.

John's face grows serious, and stares down his nose when he finally asks, "You're not gonna ask me to paint over the wood or rip out the built-in hutch, are ya?"

His relief over your answer is palpable: No. That's why you bought the house in the first place. You describe what you love about it: the glass doorknobs, the dining room archway, and transom windows above the doors. He nods. He knows exactly what you mean.

Before he leaves for the day, he stops at the doorframe and points to the tallest name etched into the wood. You explain it belonged to the previous owners, a family with seven kids.

"Seven," he repeats, eyebrows raised.

"Right? Can you believe that? Seven!" You laugh. Frankly, anything more than two sounds insane. 

But John doesn't laugh. He stares at the names for a moment, his jaw tight. "Yeah. Difficult to imagine."

After he leaves, you scold yourself. You don't really know John. You've known him for all of a day. What if he came from a big family? Or what if he doesn't speak to his family anymore, if things are complicated with his parents? You feel awful, and the guilt channels itself into stress-baking.

The next morning, when he shows up, there's a platter of breakfast pasties waiting on the counter. He hesitates, looks almost bashful, until you insist. He takes a bite, then another, and looks at you with genuine astonishment. He says if you leave food like this every morning, he'll knock his rate down even further.

It makes sense, financially speaking, so you agree. You start making breakfast for two, and in return, he keeps the repairs affordable. The ritual becomes routine: John shows up every weekday morning, you eat together, he gets to work, and you leave. You look forward to seeing him. Hearing his voice rumble out good mornings and goodnights.

For two weeks, you come home to find steady progress on the kitchen. You help him out for an hour or two in the evenings, and by the time it's nearly finished, you've started discussing other parts of the house.

You mention the two smallest children's rooms aren't really usable for tenants. You show him your plans to knock down the wall between them and create a library or office space.

But this time, John doesn't agree.

"First I'm hearing of this," He leans back in his chair at your table. His arms cross over his chest, legs spreading wide. Even sitting, you see what he's doing. Trying to take a posture that carries authority, to cow you. "Tenants? What about a family?"

You try to steer the conversation back to your plans, to the picture you've sketched. "I'm not planning on having one. So, like I was saying—"

"Why buy a house this big, then? Why spend all this time fixin' it up if you're not planning to honor its legacy?"

The tone of his voice shifts completely, with no trace of the easy, flirty banter that's been your norm for weeks. His words drip with disdain. His brow knits together. Nostrils flaring. He looks genuinely upset. Mystified that you're not going to fill the house with your…your brood.

It's as if your refusal to have children is an affront to him personally. 

It sends a chill down your spine. Instantly, your image of him—this dependable, good-humored man—cracks apart. You glance past him, searching for the right words, and focus on the kitchen instead. The cabinets, the fixtures, the paint. All of it bears his mark now, and it leaves a sour taste in your mouth.

The realization settles like a stone in your stomach. You can't keep working with him. Not if your plans for the house, your house, are going to be a problem.

You tell him as much, as gently as possible.

His anger bleeds out of him quickly, melting into embarrassment and shame. His shoulders drop, and he folds into himself in a way that seems almost impossible for someone his size. "Don't know what came over me, darl."

He packs up his tools while apologizing again, both for his outburst and for the unfinished work, and gives you the spare key you lent to him for emergencies. Before he leaves, he asks you not to write a review, not even a positive one, and you agree. Things had been good until now. You don't want to ruin him over this. People have bad days.

With the kitchen functional and nothing too big left on your plate, you cut your losses and decide to finish the work alone.

Progress is slow on your own, of course. One pair of hands, only so many hours after work to chip away at the list after work. Still, time moves faster than you expect. You push through exhaustion, head often swimming, and work late into the evenings. One night, you finish patching the floor and tackle the basement's cracked wall. Only when you get down there, it's already done. Smoothed over perfectly.

You tell yourself John must've fixed it before everything went south. But then you notice other things. Several odd jobs from your list are already complete.

Squeaky door hinges turn silent. The dings and nail holes in the walls, spackled over. The second toilet that kept running starts working correctly. It's partly a relief, like the house is taking care of itself, but also deeply unsettling. You don't remember doing it, you've never sleepwalked or slept-repair in your life, even in your overtired state, and you're still too sore over your falling out to text John and ask if he did it all.

Instead, you decide to take a break. A few days off work, a proper rest. Let the house settle, let yourself breathe. Nothing happens. No floating tools. No ghosts. It's like the house is waiting for you to look away.

Paranoia sets in. You order cameras—indoor and outdoor, enough to cover every angle.

The day they arrive, you barely make it through the door before tearing open the box. But something stops you. Your eyes catch on a strange wooden box sitting on the dining table. It's a shadowbox.

Inside the box is the slat from the front doorframe, the one with the heights and names of the seven kids who grew up here. It's been cut out, perfectly, and framed like an artifact.

Your stomach drops. You scramble to the doorframe and run your hands over it, frantic. The patchwork is seamless, so clean it's like the names never existed.

Then you notice the boots. Tucked in and lined up next to your own pairs. The extra jacket hanging on the hooks.

A shadow falls over you.

You freeze, heart in your throat, and slowly turn with eyes the size of dinner plates. Towering above you, sleeves rolled to his elbows, fists planted on his hips, is John. Grinning.

"Work alright today?" He bends down and pulls you to your feet by your wrist, wrapping you up in an embrace and welcoming you home. He sways slightly with you, like you're dancing, his chest rising and falling against yours. He looks at you with a clear fondness and affection, but there's something off, like a splintering foundation. Stable until you look too close.

You try to push yourself away, palms flat against his chest, but he doesn't let go. "What are—What are you doing here? What are—Why did you do that?" You glance again toward where the measurements used to be.

He chuckles, soft and unbothered, a wistfulness threaded in his words. "Well, we're gonna need the room for our little ones, yeah? Oh, we'll have seven or more, dependin' on what takes. Sliding scale and all that."

At your stunned, horrified silence, he slots a hand into the back pocket of your jeans. He gives your cheek a little squeeze and starts steering you toward the kitchen. The one he built for you.

"C'mon. Lemme tell you all about my plans for us."

[heyysteven]

I love, I love, I love

Summary: Some Husband!salesman headcannons

Warnings: Brief mentions of death and Fluff :))

Husband!salesman who just loves to be the little spoon, he absolutely loves the feeling of resting his head on your chest as you caress his hair talking about the details of your day. He didn't mind being the big spoon either. He just loves any reason to be wrapped around you really.

Husband!salesman who could hear you talk for the rest of his hours. Tell him about the book you just finished reading, tell him about the new recipe you wanted to try, tell him about new gossip at work. He would listen patiently and ask questions wherever he got confused.

Husband!salesman who texted you every two hours. Did you reach your office safely? I’m eating the sandwich you packed! Did you have your lunch? Any updates on the new gossip? Will reach home in twenty minutes;)) Do you want anything from the grocery store? Got you donuts just in case.

Husband!salesman who would take pictures of every sunset, every animal, every flower and send them to you because they reminded him of you and how you would have taken pictures if you were with him.

Husband!salesman who would buy you a huge bouquet of flowers before every date night, conveying different messages using the language of flowers. Last time he got home one full of red tulips and sunflowers (because his passion for you ran murderously deep silly!).

Husband!salesman who planned every date night down to the minute. He would book the reservations for that cuisine you once mentioned you wanted to try. He would whistle as soon as you step out the room in your evening dress, twirl you by your hand and ask for the n’th time how he got so lucky (would definitely be disappointed if you wore something without back zips). He would always be the perfect gentleman for you; right from driving you, opening the doors, pulling your chairs, all you had to do was shut your brain and enjoy the evening.

Husband!salesman who always tried matching his tie to the color of your dress.

Husband!salesman who loved holding hands more than life itself. He would love feeling the cold metal of your wedding ring every time you locked your fingers. He would walk around with the most proud smile ever on his face, softly swinging your intertwined fingers with each step.

Husband!salesman who could never say no to you. He was born with a lot of impressive abilities and strategic skills. Murdering someone with a fork? Easy! Selling people the idea of getting rich by playing a bunch of game? A piece of cake! Saying no to his wife? What is that? Shouldn’t it be punishable by law?

Husband!salesman who couldn’t cook to save his life. He somehow ended up burning everything he put on stove, so he just stuck to cleaning instead. It was a silent agreement, you would make the breakfast and dinners and he would wash and dust while you cooked. On days he ran late, he loved being welcomed by the aroma of the dish you were making. It made him feel like that this was the reason he was alive.

Husband!salesman who still got flustered when you kiss his cheek. It had quickly become your power move. On the rare occasion where you disagreed upon something, you would simply kiss his cheek and watch him fumble with his words. It was the most adorable thing ever.

Husband!salesman who would kiss and bite your neck every chance he got. He loved the fact that he could attack your neck any time he wanted.

Husband!salesman who loved when you asked him to pick you up after work. He waited for the moment you would come running and jump to hug him tight.

Husband!salesman who always noticed every single detail. Like the time he caught a man making you uncomfortable while walking. He did exactly what the man deserved; beat him till his teeth were bloody and carved his fingers out from their socket,  for ever daring to make his wife feel unsafe.

Husband!salesman who got jealous easily. He didn’t ask for much, he just wanted every single person with conspicuous intentions towards you to just get hit by a truck on the highway (with him driving the truck preferably).

Husband!salesman who always made sure to support your hobbies! Even if you abandon them after two weeks, he’s proud of you for trying.

Husband!salesman who hated your plushies and teddy bears. He hated how much distance they created between you while sleeping. He would just throw them to the floor when you weren’t looking.

Husband!salesman who doesn’t like getting his shirt bloody because “My wife chose that for me, its rude of you to bleed on my clothes.”

Husband!salesman who says I love you like it’s the air he needs for breathing. He would find every reason to squeeze your hands thrice.

[probablyreadinsmut]

The Cooldown.

One shot.

Pairing: Boyfriend! Joel Miller x Mid/Plus size Afab!Reader

Pictures used are just for reference purposes, you are the lucky gal in this fic

Summary: Your boyfriend can't resist offering you a little post workout fun. Completely inspired by those pictures of Pedro from yesterday.

This one goes out to all my thigh riding girlie's (gn) <3

Warnings: 18+ MDNI! Established relationship, AU no outbreak, Mentions of being body conscious in the past, vague descriptions of being fuller figured nothing specific though, sweaty post gym thigh riding, Praise, dirty talk. Undefined legal age gap. Spanking.

Not beta'd and probably not proofread very well, putting the disorder in adhd, as ever. ✌️

Word Count: 1.1k

Masterlist

“C’mere baby” Joel’s patting his thick thigh with a lecherous grin on his face as he’s watching you peel off your gym wear, the damp nylon is sticking to every inch of you.

You respond with a soft snort “What do you mean come here? Joel, I feel gross. That work out nearly killed me today.” It had been his idea to start going to the gym together, another ‘couples bonding’ experience he’d said. He was big into that kind of thing, but honestly you were pretty sure it was so he could watch your tits and ass jiggle, he thought he was slick.

“Do I look like I care darlin’? Get that beautiful ass over here and ride my thigh, c’mon...” It’s a command and an invitation all in one, your boyfriend of two years knew what he wanted, he’s never sugar-coated it and that horny, feral part of your brain loved that about him.

So, you shuck off your sports bra over your head, tossing it into the hamper. You can feel the sweat that had collected beneath the material was now running down your sternum, trickling to your belly button. You’d already be in the shower if you were alone, but these days doing anything alone is a huge feat in itself where Joel is concerned. On the days he’s not working, or when Sarah is at school, he’s with you, making the most of your time together. Usually naked.

You watch as his once brown eyes go almost completely black with desire, pupils blown wide, the bulge in his sinfully short shorts is impossible to ignore. You’d tease him a little more if you weren’t so fucking turned on. Maybe a joint session at the gym had been for both his benefit and yours. He’d been eyeing you in your figure hugging leggings and tight little sports bra while you’d been ogling his thighs and ass the whole time.

You should have known that once you made it back to your place, you’d both be spending the rest of the day engaging in a more horizontal form of exercise.

So you tug off your leggings, shimmying out of them as you take your panties off with them, his eyes never leave you for a moment, his gaze is both predatory and appreciative. You’re his. Every day he thanks his lucky stars for that.

You put on a little show for him as you strut towards the bed where he sits, his thighs parted wide, leaning back on his palms. Your hips shake hypnotically with every step. Before Joel, you hadn’t loved your body that much, but now with the way he worships every dip and curve, whether it be with his eyes, lips, tongue or fingers, now you love your fuller frame. Gone are the days where you’d be covering up in t-shirts that swamped you at the gym, you were beautiful and you didn’t feel the need to hide any more.

You lower yourself onto his thick thigh, more defined these days, he’d said a while ago that he wanted to stay in shape now he was getting ‘older’, if not for his sake then for the sake of his babygirl and you were more than happy to support him, they way he supported you in everything you wanted to achieve.

“That’s it” He coos, leaning back just pinning you with a stare that has you melting already “Fuck darlin’ look at you, pretty as a picture. Y’look good just like this...”

You preen under his praise, a little giggle leaving you as you plant your hands on his broad shoulders and start to glide along his thigh, the ridges and hairs tickle your clit just right. “Maybe we just skip the gym next time... Stay home and fuck all day instead?” That earns you a sharp spank, making you gasp, soothed by his thick fingers pawing at the fleshy part of your cheek. It’s a sweet sting that’s left there, one you know has probably left a red mark, one that has your cunt clenching around nothing nonetheless, dribbling onto his naked thigh.

“I could spend all day in this pretty little pussy, y’know that” His hands come up to your hips, kneading the soft flesh under his fingertips “But there’s just something about you... All hot and sweaty out in public that makes my motor run baby... maybe next time y’let me fuck you in the locker room huh? Stay nice an’ quiet for me while I bend you over one of those benches? That sound good sugar?” he’s guiding you now, pressing you down harder against his thigh, urging you to roll those gorgeous hips of yours.

With a breathy moan you nod and he spanks you again, the slap echoing throughout the bedroom.

“Use your words sweetness, need t’hear you say it.”

You feel your release quickly creeping up on you, his thigh is getting slicker by the second. You grind yourself deeper agaisnt his thigh with his guidance giving your swollen little clit all the attention she so desperately needs. “Yes! Fuck baby- P-please next time... N-next time fuck me just like that...”

He can feel you tensing up on top of him, he can hear the little hitches in your breath all the subtle cues that tell him you’re about to make a mess on his thigh.

“That’s it darlin’ just like that, keep goin’.. Fuck... After this we’re gonna go take a shower together and I’m gonna bury my cock so deep inside you, that you won’t know where you end and I begin... Gonna make this tight little pussy sing for me” His jaw is set and tense as he grits his teeth, urging you to move faster, you look between the two of you seeing his cock straining painfully against the stretchy fabric of his shorts, begging to come out and play.

You throw your head back, nails digging into his taut flesh as your orgasm washes over you like a tidal wave of pleasure. The deep, filthy groan that leaves him as he watches you fall apart is one that will be engrained in your memory for years to come.

His thigh is soaked, he can feel it running down his knee and he fucking loves it. Your cries of ecstasy are just dying down when he releases his grip on your hips and helps you up onto your feet, holding you upright since you’re knees are buckling like a deer taking their first steps.

He’s guiding you towards the ensuite when he ducks his head down to drawl in your ear “C’mon baby, let’s get you all cleaned up so I can make you dirty again”.  

Tags: @almostempty @itwasntimethatdidit40 @joelmillerisapunk @baronessvonglitter @syd-djarin @mysterious-moonstruck-musings @guiltyasdave

[vantedaes]

cry, cry, cry

pairing: nanami kento x f!reader tags: porn with little plot, dacryphilia (or an attempt at it at least) soft dom nanami, slight breathplay, fingering, alcohol use, body fluids mentions, unprotected sex, manhandling, slight objectivization, passing out, hair pulling, pussy spanking, slight breeding kink, reader does not talk but because of the context no because she can't. NO PROOFREAD. an: English is not my first language, there might be mistakes that would be addressed,,, someday, for now I just want this to be posted it has been sitting on my drafts like forever. Inspired by this tiktok of my lovely bbh

MINORS DO NOT INTERACT +18 ONLY!!!

!Husband Kento was not a stranger to being enraged when working overtime, however, he didn't make a habit of taking that rage home, where his lovely wife was waiting for him. Unfortunately for him, today was one of those days he couldn´t stop the bubbling wrath when returning home after insufferable overtime hours cleaning everyone´s messes.

Of course, he had sent you a text beforehand letting you know that it was for the best to allow him time to cool down before talking to him, and thankfully you've been supporting and understanding as ever telling him that he shouldn´t worry and that a glass of his favorite bourbon was already served in his study.

You knew exactly that your lovely husband had an especially rough day, you could tell by the sound of the door opening an abrasive almost like the FBI was breaking into your house, you could hear from your shared room the loud slamming of the door, so strong it made you flinch, your cat scaping your blanket running into hiding somewhere in the closet.

Closing your book you put it on your nightstand and heard how the heavy steps of your husband made their way to your home, you could listen to the rustling of his clothing and another slam of what you could guess was his suitcase, oh, he was real upset, Not long after that you hear him opening the door of his study. Standing up you got out of your shared room, you didn't want to bother him at all knowing he had to blow some steam, so you just went to the drawing room to assess the situation, with soft steps you saw how his coat was thrown under the hanger and his suitcase a few steps from the coat, open, revealing what you could only assume was red numbers and some other reports he had to deal with, you did your best to accommodate everything in its place hearing your husband going slamming things in his office.

You knew it was better to just go to sleep and wait for him to come to bed whenever he felt like it, but, you were also curious, you´d never seen him this upset, so after getting his things together you made your way silently to his study, almost on tiptoes, the door was wide open which made your little espionage easier. Only the light of his desk was on, you leaned in the doorframe like a child trying not to get busted when they know were being naughty, your breath caught into your throat when you saw him, his back to you pouring even more of the bourbon and gulping it in just one quick motion, his muscles evidently tense making him look even bigger, menacing even, his big hands gripping the glass and the movement of his throat working that burning alcohol down like it was nothing.

And dear lord, you could feel your pajama shorts getting soaked.

Your skin burned like it had caught on fire, you weren't unfamiliar with how insanely hot and attractive your husband was, but this was different, this was the first time you'd seen him, this, this enraged, his whole demeanor changing in a drastic form that you've never experimented and your eyes were glazing for just the sight, your fingers itching to help you relieve some of that tension desire building in the pit of your stomach. Your husband then sits on his chair, his strong tights expanding, and his crotch more prominent, his hair like a full mess, golden locks falling into his gorgeous face that was contorted into a hostile expression that only made you press your tights even closer to each other, you could feel yourself trembling with a raw need that was taking over every grain of your sanity.

But then in a swift motion, after struggling to take off his tie he simply opted for tearing the damn thing apart, the buttons of his shirt flying to different parts of the room, allowing his massive chest to breathe and with that sinful sight you couldn't help but gasp. Still, in reality, it was more like a pitiful whimper that was capable of getting your very angry husband´s attention to you.

The moment your eyes connected with his dark eyes you didn´t move an inch, something like fear and excitement creeping into you, like a fear of a beast that found the most helpless prey on its own lair, which was accurately what was happening.

Your husband stood up and gulped the whisky quickly, licking his lips as he addressed you.

"C´me here" His voice was raspy, like going through your whole body, it made you quiver even more, made your whole being more intoxicated.

Slowly you approached him, his eyes never leaving you for a second, and you were used to Kento´s eyes on you, his attentive and longing gaze every time he looked at you, but the way he was looking at you now was something else, like drinking the sight of you, like devouring your whole image, resembling a madman that has been starved. When you got close enough you stopped, just a few centimeters separating you, he smirked cockily his lips glazed with the bourbon, and your nostrils were filled with the scent of his cologne mixed with alcohol it roamed through your figure and you find yourself inhaling it, fueling even more the heat that was about to explode inside your body. Your husband looked amused at how you were paralyzed in front of him like you were asking permission to touch him, your own husband, it was ridiculous, and yet it was what his good girl knew had to do.

"Look at you, shamelessly spying on me when I perfectly told you to give me space" His hand gripped your chin with a strength that made you part your lips in surprise "Now that you got what you wanted...you´re all shaky, angel"

You wanted to answer sure, it wasn´t your nature to stay quiet, you were always quick with a comeback but just like in a trance, you were just mute and so fucking needy, he, your husband, was not a man who loses his calm like ever, one year of marriage and you've never seen him this deranged.

He could hardly blame you for how your body reacted, you yourself didn't know you could find him even hotter.

Quivering, you tried to speak "I—"

And without any kind of warning, he grabbed your waist with a strength that made you gasp in surprise, the sound of shattering glass stealing your attention for a quick second —he really threw his glass on the floor—, but as soon as you felt your frame pressed tightly at the body of Kento your mind went to a fucking blank again, contemplating how his normally hazel color eyes were totally pitch black. His arm was like an iron band around your waist and your hands posed on his big chest trying to hold onto something, his closeness making you quiver like a leaf and you could just read in his expression how much he liked all of your wretched reactions.

"Shh...it´s alright angel" he whispered hotly upon your lips "I already know what you want"

Before you could process any of his words he took you and bent you over his desk, your hips pressed against the edge of it and all of the stuff on top of it falling down, the bottle of whiskey spilling over the wood surface where your face was now pressed against wetting your cheek and lips, you were never a fan of whiskey —or any strong alcohol really—, but right now you welcomed it eagerly with your mouth hanging open when you felt the hot and rough hands of your husband stripping you off your pajama shorts, your cunt being met with the breeze of the room, soaked, you felt how your juices were already trailing your tights. You moaned pitifully, your hole clenching into nothing.

Nanami laughed in a vibrato that made your knees buckle, "Look at that, so fucking wet..." his fingers trailed your dampness pressing over your wet swollen lips gathering all the liquid before entering your entrance in a quick movement, you let out a high pitched moan at the sudden intermission "That´s right angel, you will take it"

He kept moving his fingers inside your cunt quickly while his other hand kept your head firmly pressed into his desk, the whisky fusing with your saliva as you kept loudly moaning, your body going into shambles quickly, Nanami was like a feral beast fucking you with his fingers letting out the hottest low grunts that were making your orgasm approach in a tidal wave in just mere seconds of his fingers inside you.

"Yes yes yes" you chanted in ecstasy, your legs fully trembling as your orgasm hit you with an intensity that would almost make you fall if it wasn't for the firm hand of your husband keeping you still on the surface of his desk, a loud moaning of his name leaving your mouth.

"made a mess of my fingers angel, so needy you came so fast" his fingers leaving your leaky entrance and trailing through your cunt greedily. you were panting with the aftermath of your orgasm, the whiskey now soaking the whole table and part of your hair "Filthy, filthy girl, looking like a used whore after just taking my fingers"

He roamed a chuckle, then you heard him sucking his fingers nastily, sounding richly across the room, and in a quick moment he slapped your pussy making you scream your already shaky legs buckling and almost falling to the floor only to be grabbed by your wrists and manhandled to your position on the table.

Another smack on your pussy made you yelp, "Come on now, don't act like this cunt doesn't like it rough" You felt him pressing against your ass, fully clothed, and yet you felt the big bulge twitching against your bare cunt, soaking his pants, it was unbearable to have his cock still on his pants when you wanted it so so so bad.

However, you could only mutter pathetic whimpers, so clouded and drunk on his cock that wasn't even inside you. "Stay put" Your husband demanded and you immediately went still, excitement filling your body as you heard him unfast his belt followed by his zipper and a delicious groan as his cock was fully out

You couldn't quite see but you knew he didn't take off his pants by the way you could feel the fabric on your tights and fuck, you could come just right there again.

"I believe you know I have no intend of going soft with you tonight," He remarked while tracing his cock on your swollen lips, his precum fusing with your juices "Oh, but look at you angel... so fucked up looking like you could die if I don't give you this cock"

"I—" A slap to your asscheek cut you off to a pathetic moan, and soon you felt the hard body of your husband pressing on your back to whisper in your ear.

"I don´t want to hear anything that is not those pathetic little moans you made" His hot breath against your neck had you shivering, with his hard cock nestled between your folds you could do nothing but behave, tears escaping your eyes betraying how much you wanted it, how much you need it, Nanami trailed your neck inhaling your scent like he needed it more than air, getting drunk on it and leaving wet open mouth kisses on your boiling hot skin. Despite the twitching of his cock against your folds he did nothing more than tease your skin with his hot breath on your most sensible zones, driving you into absolute madness, your hole clenching, hungry, and desperate.

His hands gripping your waist tightly, you were sure tomorrow it'll have a mark. "Nothing more than a slut for this cock hm?" he teased leaving your back, standing again he took your jaw turning your face to him, when you looked at his handsome face his eyes looked like a deep endless void of how black and dilated they were, not a trace of his usual hazel like eyes, he looked at you with ravenousness, his eyes darting through your face that was now covered in tears

His cock twitched at the sight of your whipping face, you started sobbing, your lips trembling in a way of begging him to fuck you.

"Oh fuck" He moaned leaving your jaw to tug on your hair and grabbing the base of his cock he finally directed his tip to your needy entrance, you moaned even more between tears feeling how the length of your husband's cock stretched you.

Fuuuuck, your husband was big and, oh, he did not intend to go soft with you, remember? So you should have expected when his full-length slammed into your cunt in a strong thrust, making you cry loud, your hands grabbing the edge of the table, you could feel his cock molding your insides, his veins popping through your walls and if you were already not intoxicated you surely were now.

Nanami moaned feeling your pussy tightening around him like you want to cut him off, he pulled your hair into his fist harder and looking straight at your eyes he hissed, "Put your fucking hands were they where"

Looking at him with big tearful eyes you clasped your hands together behind your back, your whole stability now depending on how your husband had your hair pulled into his fist. "Such an obedient girl... Now keep sobbing like a dumb slut while I feed you this cock"

And with that, you could only hiccup pathetically, Nanami's thrusts were erratic and fast, kissing every bit of your insides, he looked at you with a deranged look, enjoying how you were drooling and crying while taking his cock so harshly, he fucking loved it, having you go all fucking stupid on his big cock and have you reduced to a needy little thing.

"Yes, fuck—that's right, so fucking tight around me" his sloppy thrust was making you dizzy on how deep he was reaching into you, your orgasm already in the making ready to burst with the warning of being even bigger than the last one and your husband knew it completely, that smirk of his adorning his lips, with that your second orgasm erupt shaking your whole body, your husband groaned pulling on your hair harder making you stare at him while you creamed his cock and your eyes rolled, tears trailing down your face to your throat disappearing on your breasts, your husband's depraved eyes look at it and soon you had him turning you around without leaving your sloppy hole to now have you laying down the desk in a more comfortably position

A position that allowed you to look upon your very disheveled husband, through your teary and hazy eyes you could see and drink at the sight of Nanami just fucking into you like a mad man, like a fucking wild animal, his hands now gripping your jaw playing with it like you were a useless doll, his fingers entering your hot mouth pressing on your tongue while he kept pounding that fat cock into you, you whimper so cockdrunk you were about to pass out feeling his hard cock kiss your cervix every time, he was ruthless in the way he was fucking you and you were obsessed with it.

"Fuck, I'm going to fill you up so fucking good" he left your jaw and slapped your tits before rubbing your clit in a maniac rhythm that pull you out of your drowsy state and soon you were filling up another orgasm approaching, "come for me sweetheart, I know you can, fuck—do it"

His thrusts were, even more, sloppier, erratic, and quick you felt like you were about to explode, it was way too much, you were pushing the limits of your oversensitive body, but oh, how you loved it especially when you felt his hard cock stiffen even more inside you and warm cum filling your insides and soon you were cumming a third time, this time even more intense than the previous ones and your whole body shudder at the immense pleasure and the fullness of the cum inside you, your husband moans in the background of your nirvana, it was as you where losing your hold on reality and soon everything went blank.

!Husband Kento was heavily panting rolling off the immense orgasm he had, only to find his lovely wife passed out on his desk, and even though his first response was to get worried that he indeed had been too rough with you, but, the happiness on your —very fucked up— face told him everything he needed to know.

Taking his dick out of you he put himself together and took your limp body in his arms to carry you into the bathroom, somewhere along the way you regained consciousness, your pretty confused eyes looked at him and soon your cheeks turned red "Hello beautiful, I'm going to take care of you now"

Simply he assured you with a smile and a kiss to your damped forehead, you smelled like sweat and whiskey.

"..." You looked like you wanted to speak and Nanami could only chuckle affectionately at your uncertainty.

"You can speak now angel"

[withleeknow]

wishful thinking. (08)

chapter eight: ships in the night

summary: the instruction was plain and simple: no strings attached. but you should’ve known from the beginning that it could never apply to you and him.

pairing: minho x f!reader rating: 18+ (minors dni) genres/warnings: friends to lovers, friends with benefits au, college au; fluff, angst, smut; i’ve been told this is the angstiest chapter yet saur yk you’ve been warned, mentions of past seggsy times, oc is self-deprecating self-sabotaging, oc has an anxiety attack in this one, erhm just Big Sad overall methinks, also could've been more edited but i am a godless monster word count: 7.2k note: wt is backkkkkk!! and it's the penultimate chapter omg :( lowkey nervous about how this is gonna be perceived bc i feel like my brand is Sad™️ and i haven't properly written anything Sad™️ in a WHILE. but yeah, wt8 is yours now have funnn. also ty chessica @matchannie for proofreading!!

as always, i’d appreciate any thoughts or comments you may have, and please drop a like and/or reblog if you enjoy reading ♡

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Sorry, I know that comment wasn’t funny Just wanted you to love me, but I didn’t go about it right Sometimes the best advice that I can give Is to bite my lip and listen with my big fat mouth shut tight

big fat mouth - Arlie

You don’t think you can ever forget the look on his face, the hurt in his eyes when the words had tumbled out of your mouth in a panicked frenzy. The regret was immediate, but so was the damage.

Saying things you didn’t mean, watching Minho so utterly defeated that it kills you, and the deafening silence after he had walked away from you on heavy footsteps – you can’t describe how it all felt that night. It’s just… sinking, and sinking, and sinking; endlessly spiraling in an ocean of your own guilt and despair. It’s true what they say – misery loves company.

Distractions don’t work, because whenever that overwhelming dread eases by even a fraction, you’re once again reminded by the bracelet that’s wrapped around your wrist with the tiny dove charm hanging on the side. Neither of you paid it any mind the other night, that much is clear.

You know you should return it to him eventually; it’s never belonged to you and it never will. But every time you go to take it off, you can’t bring yourself to simply undo the clasp and hide the bracelet somewhere you can’t see. It lets you delude yourself into thinking that you haven’t lost him even after what you said, even after you stomped on his heart and left it bleeding where you stood. 

You’d been upset, thinking that you were the only one falling, terrified that you’d crash headfirst into the cold, hard ground because there’d be nobody to catch you. And yet, when Minho told you he loved you, it provided you no relief at all. The fear magnified tenfold, taking over you until you couldn’t see straight, until it consumed you whole.

Home is something you find, and you’ve found it in him. Your sun and your spring and your home, and everything good that you can ever name.

All your life, something is always missing, an empty space that you never learned how to fill. Like when you exit a room and there’s a nagging feeling in your gut telling you that you’ve forgotten something even though all of your belongings are accounted for. Like when you lose your favorite ring, one that’s a little too loose but beloved anyway, slipping over your knuckle without your permission and disappearing forever, and you keep running your fingers over where the golden band used to be until you come to terms with the fact that it’s never coming back and you’ll spend the rest of your life mourning the loss of that familiarity.

You’ve always looked for things you lost in places you’ve never been.

You just want to go home, but you know you’ll only ruin it in the end.

The problem has never been Minho or anybody else. It’s you, and how there’s something intrinsically wrong with you. You paint the ending before there’s even a beginning. You’d rather run and hide than let yourself feel anything, because if there’s happiness then there’s going to be hurt inevitably.

You don’t want him to wake up one day and look at you like you’re a stranger, to realize that he’s wasted his time and effort, that you just weren’t worth it after all. 

It’s funny how, when you’re a child, time seems to move so quickly. One minute, you’re four, maybe five years old, and your mother is refusing to speak to you because she thinks you ruined one of her bags, a large scratch running along the otherwise smooth leather surface like it’s been met with a pair of scissors or simply accumulated on her way to work and she hadn’t noticed until she got home and you happened to be in the vicinity of her anger; the next, she’s letting you relish in all your favorite desserts, cavities be damned.

One minute, you’re being rushed to the hospital with a bad case of food poisoning, your parents staring down at you as if you’re actually about to die; the next, you’re already at home, watching cartoons that you couldn’t understand but you like anyway because they’re full of pretty colors and princesses and fairies.

You don’t remember how your mother came to forgive you for the bag even though it wasn’t your fault, or what the hospital felt like or if what the doctors and nurses did to make you feel better even hurt. You only know that you wish to return to a smaller version of yourself whose memories you can’t even recall, return to a time in which you once so desperately wanted to escape from.

Now, when you’re hurt, time doesn’t pass in a blink of an eye like it used to. It stands still, sucks you down a vortex and makes you feel everything. 

No one ever really warns you about growing pains, that they’re unavoidable no matter how hard you try to avoid them, that they can last a lifetime because you never really stop growing, and it never really seems to ache any less.

Hyunjin: Attachment: 1 Image. Hyunjin: i sent this one in  Hyunjin: u??

You’d almost forgotten about the exhibition until Hyunjin had sent you those texts. Even though you’re not one to neglect deadlines, you suppose it’s fairly reasonable that this one in particular had slipped your mind. You haven’t really been able to wrap your head around that many things after all.

Every semester, yours and Hyunjin’s department rents out a gallery near campus for a whole week to showcase students’ works. It’s nothing exclusive, nothing like a competition where they pit a couple hundred kids against each other just for a spot at a fancy art gallery. Almost anyone in the Faculty of Arts can register before the submission deadline, and you suppose that’s another reason why you’d overlooked it so easily – because you didn’t earn it. It didn’t feel special. It was just another meaningless event to attend.

Regardless, you spent a chunk of an afternoon pondering your selection though it didn’t matter that much, almost two hours dedicated to picking out paintings you realized you didn’t love. Some you even turned out to hate, even though you could remember the pride radiating from you the moments the canvas had felt the last brush stroke. Maybe the glamor eventually wore off, the momentary high that coursed through you when you’d shown your finished works to your professors and peers, and received showers of praise in return.

The piece you chose in the end wasn’t your favorite by any means, but it was one of the only pieces you could still bear to look at without nitpicking too much. It was a painting of the waters, and you’ve always loved the waters.

You could recall the day you went to the promenade by yourself with a need to be away from everyone and everything, and an overshirt that was too light to combat the September evening chill as summer transitioned into fall. You watched the sky slowly darken after the sun had disappeared from view, watched as the buildings on the other side of the river lit up one by one until they made up for the light that retired for the day.

The thin layers made you shiver – the consequence of your poor choice in clothing that night – but there was something about sitting by the waterfront after dark, kicking pebbles around underneath your feet, and the gentle caress of the wind on your face and your hair that made the cold feel welcoming. You always thought the city was more beautiful at night, more calming amidst all of its perpetual chaos. It made you feel like you were inside a dream long forgotten, took you back to a north star that you left to gather dust on an abandoned shelf.

You could recall wanting to dive into that dream again, a dream in which you could chase a perfect version of you that would never exist and find light at the end of the tunnel, instead of returning to the reality where you always wound up suffocating in darkness. You wanted to be free, free from the noise and free from your own life despite one simple truth that you knew all too well – that you could run but never from yourself.

When you were young, it’s the moon that used to follow you everywhere. As you get older, it’s all of the things that keep you up at night.

You could recall your phone buzzing to life in your bag with Minho’s name on the screen, like a sign from the universe saying “Hey, this one’s for you. Don’t drown. You have a lighthouse.” and it was as though he could sense that you were falling, like someone had tied your heart to a rock and threw it into the very river in front of you to sink to the bottom. Your friends often said he had some sort of sixth sense when it came to you. Maybe there was some truth in that.

His voice pulled you out of it, even though he only called to ask if you wanted to come over and eat the boatload of food his mom had sent. He made you want to disappear a little less and in that moment, it was enough.

You left your hiding place to go to him, to lose yourself in stupid jokes and not-too-sweet desserts even if it was only for a couple hours. And when you returned home that night, everything spilled onto the canvas just from memory alone, from the feeling that you were desperately clinging onto with your shaking hands.

You always thought you could only run away to places. You didn’t know people could be escapes too, and somewhere along the way, that was what Minho became to you — your treasured escape, your new hiding place.

You manage to avoid everyone – with the exception of Hyunjin; you do have to see him in class after all – over the two and a half weeks leading up to the exhibition, drumming up excuse after excuse to bail whenever any of them asks to grab a bite together or just to simply hang out. If they saw you, they’d notice your puffy eyes and ask if you’ve been crying. They would ask why, and you can’t find in yourself to make up a lie believable enough for that kind of question.

You think Hyunjin has noticed. He’s a bit of an idiot sometimes, but he’s not stupid and he’s still blessed with the gift of sight. He doesn’t mention anything though, despite you showing up to almost every class with puffy eyelids. You suppose you’re grateful for that.

Minho hasn’t talked to you at all since that night. Doesn’t ask you how your project’s going, doesn’t ask you about the exhibition, barely even speaks in the group chat, not even a boring comment about the weather. What were you expecting anyway? You get it, you do.

But despite the silence, you never doubted that he would show up to the exhibition. If not for you, then he would be there to support Hyunjin.

The only person who really has an inkling that something is wrong is Jess, when you were getting ready together earlier tonight and she helped you conceal your puffy eyes. She’d tiptoed around the question before settling on  asking “Everything okay?” — simple, easy, quickly dismissible if you didn’t feel like sharing.

You didn’t, and she dropped the subject because there was no point in badgering you for answers anyway. 

Chan picked the both of you up afterward, and Jess didn’t have to explain anything to him when she slipped into the backseat with you instead of riding next to her boyfriend.

Now here you are, standing in a room full of your friends and peers, wearing a black dress that Jess helped you choose, and Minho is nowhere to be found. You’d spent all day pacing around, anxious at the mere thought of seeing him and even talking to him. What you hadn’t anticipated was the disappointment, the unbearable feeling in the pit of your stomach in response to his absence. You can’t tell which is worse; maybe every moment without him all sucks the same.

When Hyunjin starts whining and takes out his phone to spam Minho’s messages demanding his location (you’re thankful that it didn’t have to come to you), all he receives in return is a measly “Running late.”

And that’s it. A mere text is enough to satiate everyone’s curiosity. Well, everyone but Hyunjin, because he’s still a nagging drama queen.

Minho is running late, and to anyone else, it’s the most normal thing in the world.

But to you… it means something beyond that. Because this was him. This was your Minho. Your Minho who’s never been known for his tardiness, who’s never once broken a promise, who’s always there for you no matter what.

All you know right now is his absence, and it makes you sink.

You sink, and then you wait. Not a lot to be done about it.

You slip away to a quiet spot, a vacant hallway, to be by yourself while everyone is out there wandering around and gorging themselves on the free food and drinks. You shouldn’t be with them anyway. All you need is to wallow in peace and not be the black cloud hanging over everybody’s heads.

There’s something so incredibly lonely in the act of waiting. Waiting to board a plane, waiting in line at the grocery store. Waiting for a phone call or text message that you know won’t come, waiting for a person whom you can only hope would show up. At the end of the day, that’s what waiting is, isn’t it? It’s wanting. It’s hoping, and if there’s one thing you know about hope, it’s that it’s dangerous.

You wonder if this is how Minho felt all this time, waiting on a girl who’s always prepared to leave. You wonder if, that night, he had expected you to reciprocate his feelings. You did. You do, and a part of you wanted to tell him that you loved him too. The words were there, and yet…

It’s true that you love him, and it’s true that you don’t want to. If hope is dangerous then love is fucking terrifying. 

He’d been so patient with you, so awfully gentle and quiet in the chasm of his waiting that you mistook the tenderness for everything except for what it actually was – love. Or perhaps you did know. Maybe deep down, you knew that you would’ve loved him back with everything you had, with every fiber of your being. That you would’ve let him be the only one to ever really know you, and it felt like a fear greater than you could bear. 

In the end, did you lose him? Can you lose something you never had? It wasn’t a love that you let slip away; it was a what if.

You’re in a room with people who love you and yet, all you can think about is Minho. You miss him so much that it feels like someone has spliced you in two, that it physically makes you ache every second that he isn’t with you. As selfish as it sounds, you want him to walk through the door and you want everything to be okay again. You want to be back in a bubble with just the two of you and a locked box filled with words unsaid. You thought you could stay in that bubble forever, where it was safe and you could pretend that you were happy, and maybe you really were happy with him. But all things — good or bad — must come to an end. The bubble burst, and this was the real world.

You want to undo your cruelty, want him to take back his sincerity. You want an ocean of distance between you and him, you want to pull him as close as humanly possible. All your wants are contradictions. You’re a paradox of puzzle pieces that never seem to fit together.

You want to tell him that it hurts. Want him to make it better because he’s the only one who can make it better.

But miracles rarely happen and there are no shooting stars in sight. Minho was the closest thing you got to a shooting star, burning across your night sky for just a brief moment. Blink and you could miss it. Blink and you did miss him.

Your fingers find his contact in your phone before you could stop yourself, and soon enough, you’re pressing the call button. It’s like drunk dialling, only you aren’t intoxicated. Or maybe you are; maybe you’re under the influence of his absence and how much it stings.

You don’t know why you’re calling him, don’t know what to even say when he picks up.

Thankfully, you don’t have to wonder for long.

“Your call has been forwarded to voicemail. Please leave your message after the tone,” comes the automated voice on the other end.

For some reason, you don’t hang up. You wait for the beep, then you wait some more. It’s not until ten seconds later that you find your voice, the only thing to come out of your mouth is a quiet Hey.

You clear your throat, rub the sweaty palm of your free hand on your dress. “Hey,” you try again. “It’s… me. I’m at the gallery with everyone. Uhm, they’re all waiting for you. Are you on your way? Are you stuck in traffic? Or did you forget it was today? Hyunjin is trying really hard not to blow up your phone–” You pause to chuckle dryly. “But you know it would mean a lot to him to have you here. It… it’d mean a lot to me too if you were here. I don’t know, I assumed you’d come. I’m sorry, that was stupid of me. I just…” Another pause. This time, it’s so that you could take a breath. “Listen, Minho, I didn’t mean what I said to you. I’m sorry I was an asshole. I’m sorry that I hurt you, I don’t have any excuse for that. You deserve better than me. It’s going to pass, you know? I’m sorry if you’ve wasted your time on me, but… you’re going to find someone else, and you’re going to get over it. I’m sorry I fucked everything up. It’s fine if you never want to talk to me again, just please don’t let it get between you and our fr–”

The line beeps again. “To replay the message, press 1. To save the message, press 2. To delete the message, press 3.”

You purse your lips together. There’s still a lump in your throat and no peace to be made. It’s like drunk dialling, only you pull yourself together at the very last second. Your thumb hovers over the dial pad on your phone until you eventually end up on 3, because your cowardice will always triumph in the end. Back to square one. Everything’s still the same as it was five minutes ago.

You force your legs to move, like how you'd force yourself to get up and eat and drink water and shower and be a person these days. When you round the corner, you bump against something solid. A person. The collision isn’t hard enough to knock you backward; they weren’t moving, they’d only been standing still.

You look up at Seungmin, who merely blinks at you. You don’t know how long he’s been here, if he heard anything at all. You swallow once, considering whether you should just play dumb and gauge his reaction or ask point blank if you’ve been caught. He beats you to the decision though.

“You and Minho,” Seungmin says, a bit hesitant, like the topic is weird to bring up. “You’re the girl.”

A deer in headlights, you are. A pathetic one at that, too.

But even then, you’re not panicked, not really. You’re just sad, and the truth was bound to come out eventually. 

“Please don’t tell anyone,” you say.

The discarded voicemail that he overheard, the dejection written all over your face, the silence from both you and Minho recently — it’s obvious to pretty much everyone, and Seungmin is smarter than most.

He opens his mouth and shuts it again like he’s choosing his words. The Seungmin-esque blank stare melting away to make space for some pity, then a question, “Is there anything left to tell?”

You escape to the empty garden in the back where there were a few lonely chairs set up, so you could have some privacy to talk. Despite everything, it feels like you’ve got a little breathing space, just being able to share this with someone. To not have to carry it all on your own. You’re glad that it was Seungmin who found out first. You have a feeling that he would understand, at least to some degree. You’re relieved, even when the first question that he asks is, “So, how did you fuck it up?”

“Why do you just automatically assume it was me?” You’re mildly offended, even though he’s right.

“Between you and Minho, I’d bet on you.” Seungmin shrugs. “You spook easily.”

“I deeply resent that notion.”

He turns to look at you, no trace of any teasing. “Can you prove me wrong?”

But you can’t, and it tells him as much when you avert his eyes in favor of the ground, where you kick at a lonesome pebble sitting among the grass. It lands somewhere between the green blades, lost in the shadows that cast over parts of the garden that are poorly lit.

“So what happened?” he asks, turning away again to stare out at the empty space. You like to think of it as him giving you some elbow room, to ease the pressure of being scrutinized. And as much as you appreciate it, it still takes you another brief moment before you can formulate a coherent sentence, another minute of twiddling your fingers in your lap.

You tell Seungmin about your first night with Minho – not the details, of course; that would be weird and it’s none of his business. Just that it happened, how you both let it keep happening over the past few months while nobody suspected a thing.

Seungmin nods solemnly, like he’s putting together the missing pieces.

“Did you ever notice anything?” you ask.

“I mean… not about you hooking up, but we thought you’d end up together eventually.” He shrugs. “We always kinda assumed that you two would become those people who make a pact to get married if you’re still single by 40 or 50, if you didn’t get together before then. It makes sense. You and Minho just sort of make sense.”

“Oh,” you say. Your heart swoops. Hearing it from Seungmin makes you sad. Not the same brand of sadness that you’ve been wearing lately though. A different kind, the kind of sadness that’s a little numbing and makes it difficult to breathe. “Well, sorry to disappoint everyone but I don’t think any of it is gonna happen anymore.”

“So… how did it happen?” Seungmin asks again, mimicking explosions with his hands.

You let him off easy without a punch in the shoulder, because you just really don’t have the energy for it right now. “Minho wanted something more,” you tell your friend, fiddling with the rings on your fingers, then with the necklace charm resting on your collarbone. “And I just… I don’t know. I guess I freaked. I… said some awful stuff to him.”

Seungmin hums a sound of acknowledgement. He looks like he’s thinking about it, about you and Minho and what it means. “Classic,” he chuckles after a brief moment, mostly to himself. Maybe he’s thinking about what it means beyond just the pair of you too.

You side-eye him. “You’d know all about it, wouldn’t you?”

He shoots the glance back at you. “What are you trying to say here?”

You remember her, the only girl that Seungmin has ever hinted at liking. He never admitted it out loud to any of you, but you could all see it.

You only used to see her in passing at house parties, and even then, it wasn’t Seungmin nor her who brought the other one around. They would show up separately with their own group, mingle for a while, find each other after a couple of drinks before they disappeared to god-knows-where for the rest of the night. Sometimes, Changbin or Hyunjin would catch them before they could sneak off and insist that Seungmin let everyone get to know his friend.

These brief interactions are all you have with her, meaningless small talk for a few minutes before Seungmin’s patience ran thin and he whisked her away like they’d both intended. You liked her; she was nice, and she was really pretty. You liked her even though you didn’t know her, because she was the one person who Seungmin cared about enough to keep away from prying eyes. A secret shared only between the two of them, a bubble in which only they existed.

The last time you saw her with him must’ve been at least three months ago, maybe even longer. No one really knows what happened, just that she stopped showing up to parties, and Seungmin never brought it up again. You all assumed whatever he had going on with her had run its course, though it doesn’t really stop Hyunjin and Jisung from mentioning her every now and again just to tease him.

“I seem to recall a Halloween party last year and a certain someone was in a bee costume and–”

“Fine,” Seungmin interjects, rolling his eyes. “Fine, we can form our own dumbass club. Happy?”

You laugh a little, even though the whole thing isn’t very funny. Your shared experience is nothing to take pride in.

“So how did you blow it up?” you ask.

He gives you a sour glare before his eyes soften. He doesn’t say anything for a while, and in his silence you find that you and him are more similar in ways that you’ve never cared enough to admit before. This sadness that you carry, you have a feeling that he knows it all too well.

“Like I said, classic,” Seungmin tells you. “She wanted something more. I freaked. I ghosted her.”

A mirror. Two sides of the same stupid coin.

You lean back against your seat. “Did you like her?”

It takes a beat, but his answer comes out as an honest, “Yeah, I liked her. Liked her too much.”

“Why did you do that to her then?”

“Why did you do that to Minho?” Seungmin deadpans, but he doesn’t seem to want a response from you. He just sighs, wistfully adding, “I’ve thought about it a lot. It’s scary to be wanted because it means someone’s putting you on a pedestal, and when you’re on a pedestal, the more it’ll hurt if you fall off. The more they’re counting on you to not let them down, the easier it is to fuck it all up. People like us, we’re flight risks. We can’t help it. We think it’s better to just leave before we can do any real damage. When you said whatever terrible shit you said to Minho, that was the first thing you thought about, right? To be cruel? That’s what I did too. Such a fucking stupid knee-jerk reaction.”

You don’t know how to respond, so you just sit there, completely still. 

Then Seungmin turns to you, and for the first time in all the years that you’ve known him, he’s looking at you, really looking at you. No snarky side-eye, no playful faux glare. Just a strange and unfamiliar sincerity, like he’s asking you to fix what he couldn’t, undo the cruelty that he never bothered apologizing for.

“Minho would understand, you know? If you’d just talk to him,” Seungmin says. “You made a mistake in the heat of the moment. But you want to have something real with him, don’t you? Otherwise you wouldn’t be here talking to me about this and beating yourself up over it.”

“I told you. That ship sailed.” And you’re standing up for no apparent reason other than the fact that you’re suddenly restless, your stomach twisting in knots out of nowhere. “He’s not even here. He didn’t even show up tonight. I think that’s saying enough.”

Your friend rises to his feet too, probably because he thinks it’s weird to be the only one sitting now while you’re upset and pacing about. It’s not until Seungmin takes a step closer that you realize you’re shaking a little.

“Hey, you good?” He puts a hand on your shoulder. “I talked to Minho yesterday. He said he’d come. Maybe something came up or he just–”

Hyunjin’s voice interrupts Seungmin in the middle of his sentence, the excited squeal carrying itself from all the way inside the gallery to the back garden through the door left ajar. Speak of the devil and he shall appear, maybe there’s a reason why people say it. It’s laughable, really.

You and Seungmin both turn your attention to the brief commotion indoors, where you see Hyunjin smiling so big that his eyes have crinkled into crescent moons, where he’s standing with his arm thrown around Minho and shaking him by the shoulders.

These days, it’s easy to pretend that time is standing still. You don’t even know if time is even passing at all; you’re just looking at him, dressed in a black blazer and some dress pants. Casual but he looks good. He always does.

You watch as he says something to Hyunjin that seems to calm the latter down a bit, at least enough for Minho to quickly scan the room, searching. You watch as his eyes sweep through all the people gathered inside, not stopping until they land on you, finding you on the other side of the glass door. Even in this terrible lighting, not entirely visible you assume, he sees you.

There was a conversation you had with Minho some time ago, when you two were sprawled out on your couch munching on strawberry Peperos and not paying attention to the movie that was playing on your TV, when he asked how you wanted your life to be at 40.

You knew what the boring answer was – you wanted your life to be stable, and you told him as much. Isn’t stability always the goal? Maybe a lame corporate job if the whole starving-artist-who-makes-it-big-overnight dream didn’t pan out. A cat and a dog named Mochi and Mocha, if you could afford two pets at once. An apartment that you owned, with framed pictures of everything you loved scattered all over the place, and stupidly cute fairy lights that you often see on Pinterest, and an unfathomable amount of plushies that your inner child was never indulged in. A peaceful and quiet life, at least to some extent. 

The honest answer, the one that you didn’t tell him, was you wanted to not live with regret.

But as you lock eyes with him, for a split second there, you know that you will.

About twenty years down the line, when you look back on your life and think of this chapter, you’ll think about a boy who loved you and whom you loved. How you broke both of your hearts trying to protect your own. You’ll wonder if he’s married, if he has kids, if he still reminisces about the girl he used to love when he was young. If he’s happy and if his dreams came true. If the sadness you caused yourself was worth it, if the pain meant anything at all. If you could go back in time and undo everything, would you?

You’ll get over it eventually – surely you will; heartbreak isn’t the end of the world – but you’ll live with the grief of what could’ve been if you weren’t afraid. You’ll be left to mourn the road not taken, your almost but never was. 

You’re the one who moves first, when it starts to become a struggle just to breathe. You stumble away from Minho’s line of sight, until you find a wall that you can rest against.

Seungmin is quick to follow. “Hey, woah, are you okay?”

Your hands alternate between balling themselves into tight fists and attempting in vain to grab at the flat surface of the concrete. There are no words that you can form to answer him. Only your ragged breathing and your pathetic effort to take in some air through your mouth.

“Okay, shit, uhm,” Seungmin sputters. “Hang on.”

Then he’s taking off. You don’t know how long he’s gone for, where he’s gone off to, and frankly, you can’t really bring yourself to care. Your hands abandon the wall in favor of your dress, something that you can actually hold onto. Your trembling fingers clutch the hem of your dress like they’re pretending it’s a lifeline, bunching and twisting the fabric in your sweaty palms. Hoping it’ll help, but it doesn’t at all.

Even over the sound of your heartbeat ringing in your ears, you could hear new footsteps coming out into the empty garden. Rushed at first, then they stop for a brief moment. You know who it is before he even approaches you.

Damn that Kim Seungmin.

The familiar scent of his cologne greets you before his voice. You spent hours and hours enveloped in this scent until it was dulled by sweat from the activities you were engaged in, if it wasn’t already softened by the kisses you would leave all over his skin.

When he calls your name, it comes out so soft, like you never broke his heart in the first place and that night was only a figment of your twisted imagination. He sounds so gentle, yet it sends you further down the crippling spiral. You don’t deserve him; maybe you never did, despite what Seungmin tried to put through your head earlier.

“I’m fine.” But you know your appearance has already betrayed your words. The first thing you say to him in weeks, and it’s a lie. You’re still leaning against the wall with your arms wrapped tightly around your trembling frame and your eyes squeezed shut. It’s a pitiful sight. Even more so when it registers in your brain that it’s Minho of all people who’s witnessing it. 

He doesn’t say anything else, only lets out a sigh, and then his hand is on your body, a warm palm touching the small of your back out of habit before he moves it upward to rub between your shoulder blades. “Can you breathe?”

His question makes you all too aware that there’s something gnawing inside of your chest, makes you think for a second there that you’re going to die though you know that you won’t. You shake your head with your eyes still closed, your breathing coming out more ragged by the second. You can’t even bear to look at him and absorb the worry in his eyes; you’re sure you’ll only cry if you do, and it’s the last thing you need right now.

But it turns out that seeing Minho’s face isn’t the only thing that can bring you to tears. When you feel him tug at your arms, his warmth on your bare skin, you start crying anyway and that makes it even harder to breathe. There’s not a single ounce of resistance in your body, your limbs obeying him easily when they untangle themselves around your waist to fall by your sides as he pulls you into his chest, with one hand over your sternum and his thumb rubbing back and forth. He’s careful about it too, like he’s handling broken pieces of something that used to be beautiful.

“You’re okay,” he says, but you’ve got your face pressed into the crook of his neck and your tears are staining the collar of his shirt. “You’re gonna be fine. Just… listen to me.”

You stay quiet, waiting for him to speak next.

“Name three things you can see,” he says. “You don’t have to say it out loud. Just think about it.”

You open your eyes finally, angling your head until most of your vision isn’t obstructed by the proximity of his body. Minho tightens his arm around you, and you blink away some of the tears.

Your black heels that your mom got you for your birthday a while ago.

The grass, darkened green and damp.

Him. 

“Three things you can hear.”

Light chatter coming from inside the gallery.

Cars passing by on the adjacent street.

Him, the sound of his breathing.

“Three things you can touch.”

The soft material of your dress against your skin.

The bracelet, hugging your wrist, weighing you down like an anchor.

And… him.

Him, him, him.

You don’t know what reason Minho makes up to excuse you for the rest of night, but you don’t bother asking. There’s really no space left in your head to think about it twice, to care about leaving your friends or feel guilty about Hyunjin because he was so excited about today. It’s too much; all you want is to go home, get away from here.

Minho calls you both an Uber back to your place. During the entire ride, he doesn’t say a word and neither do you. And even though you mostly opt for looking out the window at the other cars and houses and people passing by, every now and then you could feel his eyes on you from the other side of the backseat.

When you arrive, he keeps a hand on the small of your back as you make your way up the stairs. When you unlock the door, you leave it open so he could follow you inside. You suppose that one is a force of habit. You’re not used to shutting the door in his face. At least, not in the literal sense anyway.

Then it returns, that gnawing feeling. A feeling far too colossal for your body to house. It sits somewhere inside your ribcage, sharp and desperate, with claws trying to dig its way out. And for the first time in maybe ever, you understand what it truly means to want something this badly. You love him, and it hurts. You love him even though it hurts.

Minho moves around the place while you remain frozen in the middle of your own apartment, as if he’s the one who lives here and you’re just visiting for the night. You let him take off your makeup (with a wipe; you’re going to hate yourself in the morning), let him help you change into clothes that you can sleep in, even let him tuck you into bed like you’re a helpless child. If he notices the bracelet on you, he doesn’t say anything. Everything is done in silence.

You don’t look him in the eye. You don’t think you can handle what you’ll find there.

But you do reach for his hand when he tries to leave now that there’s nothing left for him to do here. There’s not a single thought behind your action, just a need to have him near.

“Can you…?” 

You aren’t brave enough to finish the question, your voice trailing off and the words dissipating like smoke after a lonely cigarette drag. You’re being selfish right now, you’re awfully aware of this.

Minho doesn’t say anything, doesn’t even let out a single sigh. For a second there, you think he’s about to leave you here, cold and alone, just like you had done to him. It would be nothing less than what you deserve.

But then he’s shrugging off his blazer and your heart is in your throat. When he slips into bed beside you, something hurts, the kind of ache that spreads all across your chest and makes your lungs burn.

Earlier tonight, he could’ve walked away and let you be somebody else’s burden. Your friends were all there, it’s not like they would’ve left you stranded.

You’re not really sure what to think. It doesn’t mean that he doesn’t hate you, but maybe it’s just enough confirmation that he doesn’t hate you more than he loves you.

You break the deafening stretch of silence with a whisper, “I’m sorry.” You don’t know what the apology is for. Are you sorry for that night, for the things you said to him? Are you sorry that you’re only yourself, that he just had to go ahead and fall for you of all people? Sorry that you’re too much of a coward and a lost cause to love him right? You don’t know, but it feels appropriate to apologize. You owe him that much.

“Don’t…” Minho says after a while. “You don’t have to do that.”

The familiar sensation returns – the one that stings the back of your eyes, burns your nostrils and makes you all choked up. You try to hold your breath and will it away, but the first tear spills without your permission, and you can’t help the shaky inhale – close to a gasp and followed by a sniffle – that punctuates your lungs when they start protesting against the sudden lack of oxygen. 

You grip the sheets so hard you think you could rip through the fabric and dig into your own palm. It’s a pathetic feeling, like a strange kind of embarrassment that you can’t quite describe. The room is deadly quiet; you know there’s no way he didn’t catch the noise.

You hear Minho shift from where he lays behind you, some rustling when he moves against the duvet and the mattress. “Don’t cry,” he sighs. And it’s still so gentle. You’ve never known him to be anything but gentle.

You bite the inside of your cheek, blinking some of the tears away. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize. Just… don’t cry.” It sounds like he’s holding something back but you aren’t sure. “Don’t cry. Go to sleep. We can talk in the morning, if you want.”

You sniffle some more, and maybe that makes Minho think he still needs to appease you even further. He reaches out finally, to brush a comforting hand against your arm. “Go to sleep. Promise I’ll be here when you wake up.”

You don’t know if you want to talk in the morning, because there’s nothing for you to say. All you really have is what he’s already heard – I’m sorry, like an utterly broken record. But you want him to stay even if it’s only for the morning. Even if all he’ll get is silence at best and choked up breaths at worst. Your last-ditch attempt at grasping straws, a futile effort to chase running water.

“Okay,” you tell him, and neither of you says anything afterward. The tears keep falling for a while, and at some point it tires you out enough to slip into a dreamless sleep.

When you open your eyes hours later, the sun is already up. The clock on your phone reads 7:06AM and the first thing you register is an uncomfortable dryness in your throat. Behind you, the bed is still warm. You can actually feel it underneath your fingertips when you reach out, the warmth dwindling from the side of the bed that’s been left vacant. Minho has never broken a promise to you before.

He’s gone, and you sink again.

all rights reserved © withleeknow. reposting, translating and/or modifying is not permitted by any means. [posted 08.01.2025]

[thanosscross]

Baby - Choi Seung Hyun/T.O.P x reader Part 3 Smut

Summary: After months of being together, everytime you sleep together it feels just like the first time still, but Seung Hyun throws a twist in this time

Warnings: Smut, lots of smut

Seven and a half months, that's how long it had been since Seong Hyun asked you to be his girlfriend, and while you were both reserved in public, you didn't hold back in the bedroom, as more time passed though, the more you learned about your lover, that in reality, the big ego, cocky, outgoing Seung Hyun was just for show, in reality, your boyfriend was basically a big teddy bear, one of the first males you met that was actually in touch with his feelings and fears, and wasn't afraid to admit it. He was your everything at the moment, you both came dependent on each other while still keeping to your independent natures, you could go days without seeing each other, but neither of you would really sleep well or truly relax until you were together again.

"Seung hyun" You whined, desperately trying to wake him up, it was a Saturday, meaning you both had the day free of any responsibilities, and while you had planned a day with your boyfriend, it seemed he had other plans of sleeping all morning. You couldn't lie though, he looked adorable laying curled up under his fluffy comforter, not to mention relaxed and peaceful, sighing you just climbed out of bed in defeat "Fine, I'll be back at noon" You threatened kissing his forehead gently, he just turned away tiredly, pulling the stuffed animal he had used as a pillow with him. You rolled your eyes giggling to yourself as you made your way out of the room looking around for anybody who was awake. "Bo-mi!" You heard the boys shouting in chorus, you just raised your eyebrows at them in confusion "Oh! y/n! We thought you were Seung hyun" Dae-Sung apologized sheepishly, blushing softly "You're fine, you guys are pretty too" You offered with a smile before making your way to the kitchen to get your morning (coffee or tea, just your choice of morning drink). Walking back with the mug, you sat next to Ji-yong glancing at the game they were playing on the tv.

You ended up playing with them for a good two hours before you all just ended up talking, it started out sweet, them complimenting you on how much you've changed Seung Hyun to where he's been a little more outgoing with things, you complimenting them on how hard they've been working lately, until they started interrogating you. "We never you see you anymore!" Ji-yong groaned "Seung Hyun stole you!" Dae-sung added, you laughed loudly hiding your face in your blanket you had wrapped around your body "He's my boyfriend!" You giggled loudly before looking towards him again "We miss you!" Tae-yung agreed crossing his arms "I miss you guys! But I practically live here! I'm right down the hall" You giggled, you could feel your face heating up as they continued "Don't think we can't hear what's happening in there! Oooo Seung hyun!" Ji-Yong teased mocking your words from the other night, whenever you thought you both were alone.

You squealed hiding your face again "Leave me alone! We're literally together! and adults!" You argued giggling loudly before looking to them "You all wouldn't understand, you're children" You giggled, they gasped at your comment before jumping and screaming out whenever they heard your boyfriend cough from the hallway "If I remember right it was, yesss, seung hyun" He stated making his way tiredly to you "You said you'd be back at noon" He frowned, you smiled at him, trying to hide the fact you were extremely flustered by the others knowledge of what exactly you sound like during sex. "Sorry, the boys are upset they don't see me as much" You giggled, Seung Hyun taking his rightful spot next to you on the couch, wrapping his arms around you tightly "They live with you?" He questioned before catching on laughing "Oh my!...you know..you guys are more than welcome to invite her to game or hangout, you just don't" He chuckled, you agreed, resting your head on his shoulder, only now realizing he had no shirt on, Not wanting to put him on the spot about his new found confidence you just smiled even wider hugging him "Not whenever you steal her!" Dae-sung whined, Seung Hyun just smirked "What you mean like this?" He asked before scooping you up with ease rushing to your bedroom, you screamed holding onto him tightly, not liking the fact he was running around corners with you in his arms.

As you got back into your room he smirked at you "Oh god, what do you want, my love?" You asked resting your hands on the base of his neck, admiring his eyes as he slowly lowered you down to your feet "You look really good in my clothes" He whispered stepping closer to you "You look really good with no shirt" You complimented, your words brought a bright pink hue to his cheeks as he blushed "You had my shirt" He protested shyly, you just shook your head giggling kissing him softly, Seung Hyun had other thoughts, taking the back of your neck in his hand as he pressed his lips against yours needier and rougher than you did. You just placed your hands in his hair, his other arm going around your waist to pull you closer to him if possible. "What has gotten into you?" You teased as he pushed you down onto the bed "You have changed me" He growled against your neck, you tilted your head to the side allowing him more access as he continued "I feel..more myself with you, you let me live my life while still being a big part of it, you know just what to say, you're perfect" He whispered, you just now realizing his lips were pressed against your jaw "You're so sweet, but I didn't change anything, you did that, Seung Hyun" You smiled, moaning softly whenever he started to leave a trail of hickeys across your neck "See? Just what to say" He smirked against your skin, before pulling away to make eye contact with you "I love you" He said, causing you to stare at him in shock, you watched the emotions run over his face "I love you too" You finally found yourself saying looking into his dark eyes, his smirk returned before you pressed your lips to his.

Gasping as Seung Hyun lined himself up with your entrance, you glanced up to look at him, his eyes were trained between the two of you, more concerned about getting everything right so he didn't hurt you. You slowly raised a hand to his cheek, tilting his head slightly to look at you "You're okay" You smiled, nodding a bit before leaning up kissing him deeply, Seung Hyun took that as his sign to ahead, pushing his dick fully in, bottoming out before he brought his hands to your face, cupping his cheeks as he kissed you deeply.

It didn't matter how many times you guys fucked each other, it would always take you both by surprise, Seung Hyun groaned quietly panting against your lips as he slowly started thrust his hips, You weren't doing much better to compose yourself, running your nails down his back and chest, trying your best to stifle your moans so your eavesdropping roommates wouldn't hear. "gongjunim, baby, easy" He groaned against your lips, it wasn't that it hurt him, he just didn't want to cum this early, not only would it be embarrassing, but he also wanted to savor the feeling before he had a whole new week of writing and recording. You turned your hands from his back to his hands, which he quickly used the advantage to pin them above your head, interlacing your fingers together as the speed of his hips thrusting increased, you whimpered loudly wrapping your legs around his hips, his hand finding it's way to your clit, rubbing a mixture of circles and figure eights against it, pulling away from your lips, he leaned back, getting a full view of you underneath him.

Feeling conscious of everything on your body settled over you as you noticed Seung Hyun's staring, you bit your lip, looking away from his gaze "Baby..look at me" He whispered, resting his free hand on your stomach as his thrusts slowed, whimpering as his dick basically slammed in and out of you. Slowly you looked over to meet his gaze "You're breathtaking my love, just like the most beautiful waterfalls, the most expelling art piece, just like the beauty of true unfiltered pure art, and it's all mine" He whispered, you wanted to giggle, even as he basically taking away your ability to properly walk for the next day, he still finds a way to be as charming as possible. "I love you Seung Hyun" You giggled, pulling him closer to press your lips against his hungrily, between his fingers on your clit and him inside of you, you were desperate to cum, but his speed was like a constantly tease, bringing you to the edge before ripping it away. "Fucking Please Seung Hyun" You moaned, growing frustrated with his teasing antics you threw your head back "Huh?" He teased, smirking, you rolled your eyes, of course, you had done it once before, as a joke, and of course he wanted you to do it again. "I'm not doing that" You giggled "Please just actually fuck me, baby" You asked, purposely pitching your voice lower with a slight seductive tone, Seung Hyun squeezed your hip tightly, not liking the reaction his body had to your voice. He just persisted, only now his lips were attached to your nipple, swirling his tongue to match the movements of his fingers on your clit, you whined loudly, cheeks growing hot with a blush, of course he had to think one of your cringiest jokes was hot.

"Please fuck me, Top, I swear I know all the words to your songs, you're so fucking hot- God damnit please!" You whined, your tone going from annoyed to just frustrated, he just seemed to find enjoyment in your neediness and frustration. "I guess" He smirked against your skin, pulling his lips off with a pop, replacing them with his hand that wasn't between your legs. "Just remember, whenever your legs hurt later, you wanted it this badly" He teased before moving his hips at a pace you swear you had never felt before, you couldn't stop the moan that was pulled from your lips as you arched your back, his fingers increasing their speed on your clit as well. You ran your hands down his back, feeling it arch under your touch, you whimpered as he groaned against your collarbone, trying to stay mindful of the headboard not smacking against the wall.

As you got closer to your orgasm you felt Seung Hyun move your legs slightly higher on his waist, his hand going right back to your nipples after words "I'm not cumming until you do, Gongjunim" He grunted, you just squeezed his shoulders tightly in reply, knowing if he kept up with the abuse on your clit you'd definitely fall apart soon. Before Seung Hyun could say anything else you pulled his lips to yours, desperate to try and muffle your moans any ways you could, your legs squeezing tightly around his waist as your pussy squeezing his cock even tighter if possible. Seung Hyun moaned himself for the first time with you, tilting his head down as he dropped to his elbow propping him up "That's it baby, use me for anything you need" He whispered leaving a final hickey right above your left nipple, you whimpered loudly as you came around him, Seung Hyun waited a moment to catch his breath before grabbing your hips, groaning, still in love with the fact your hips fit perfectly in his hands. You bit your lip looking up at him, this time as he looked between the two of you, he had a different look in his eyes, he bit his lip as he started his pace again, this time alot more sloppy, he felt like he was about to explode, somehow harder than he had been in months, and the way you felt around him wasn't helping the situation, the closer he got to cumming, the worse it got. Noticing his pace starting to falter, you placed a hand on his chest pushing slightly to roll the both of you, positioning yourself to straddle him, you started to roll your hips against his. His grip on your hips tightened as his head fell back "Fuck, please don't stop, baby" He begged, his tone pitched slightly higher "Why would I stop, my love? You look fucking amazing like this" You asked pressing soft butterfly kisses down his jawline and neck, leaving hickeys as soon as you got to his collarbone, knowing that they needed to be hidden in order for him not to be in trouble.

Seung Hyun never realized how hot it'd be to have you on top, especially while having you try to boost his confidence, but here you were and he'd be lying if he said it didn't make his cock even harder if possible. "Fuck! Fuck! Baby I'm so close" He groaned sitting up to bring your lips to his for a very sloppy kiss, a mixture of tongue and teeth connecting as you copied your previous movement, squealing as he dug his nails into your hips, holding them where they were, his hips lifting up to meet yours as he started to cum, you kissed him deeper as you felt the warm liquid spill into you. After a few minutes, Seung Hyun slowly shifted to lay you onto the bed and pull out of you, much to your dismay, you let him, not without giving him one last short kiss. "I swear..everytime is like the first time" He panted as he hid his face in the curve of your neck, you trailed your nails over the back of his hairline and down his neck, feeling him slowly catch his breath, you couldn't shake the thought you had the entire time Seung Hyun said I love you. "Baby?..are you okay?" His deep voice pulled you from your thoughts "I'm amazing..trust me..but..did you mean what you said?.." You asked nervously, now twisting his messy hair in-between your fingers "That I love you?" He asked, almost like he could read your mind, you just hummed in agreement "Of course I meant it, I wouldn't ever say something to you that I don't mean" He said, leaning away to be able to look you in the eyes "I love you, Y/n, You make me feel like a good..happy person" He smiled softly, pressing a gently kiss to your forehead "I love you too, then" You smiled, before starting to sit up "Shower with me?" You offered, he just smirked standing up offering his hand out to you, taking a moment to admire how truly amazing he looked naked. "Oh Y/nnn.." He called out in a teasing tone "You like?" He smirked turning to face you to pull you up out of bed "I very very much like, sir" You replied, placing your hands on his chest as you walked him backwards into the bathroom.

--

You like? No seriously though, I tried my best but everything today kept snapping me out of the zone, so I apologize it's not my usual smutty work

[gothicfied]

Kang No-eul / Guard 011 Headcanons

Pairing: Kang No-eul / Guard 011 x fem!reader

Warnings: Mentions of drinking/alcohol, other than that it's just fluff, not proof read (english isn't my first language)

જ⁀➴ Working that shitty job as a costume performer at your local amusement park was hard enough, and the money problems that plagued your every thought were making the situation worse. Most of your co-workers would go out for dinner together after your shift, basically only to drink their problems away and forget about this hell for a night. The only one who'd also stay behind like you was No-eul. You didn't know much about her, as she'd be super secretive about her life, but you at least knew she was a nice person.

જ⁀➴ One time after work it was literally pouring outside, and since you didn't own a car or an umbrella apparently, she offered to take you home with her. You guys hurried over her car and got in as soon as possible and only then you noticed that it seemed like she was living in here. Looking at No-eul, you could tell that she was slightly embarrassed, so you didn't bother mention it or asking about it — Instead, you thanked her a thousand times and more for taking you home.

જ⁀➴ From then on, she'd drive you home one or two times a week so you wouldn't have to take public transportation. At one point, you invited No-eul in, offering to cook dinner as a thank you to her. After a few times it became a regular thing and she actually seemed like she was enjoying it, a smile replacing her usual stoic expression. You also never quite understood how she was so good at her job, entertaining the kids and all, when she was the complete opposite when taking the heavy costume off.

જ⁀➴ She'd help you out in the kitchen sometimes, often catching herself staring at some old childhood pictures of you that you hung up on the refrigerator.

"Oh, that one is cute." No-eul mumbled, pointing at a picture taken at one of your school's dance recitals when you were quite young. "Huh? Oh yeah," you turned around to the picture she was pointing at chuckling a bit, "I was like what? Maybe three? Four? It's one of my mom's favorite pictures, though." You didn't get a reponse back. When you turned around again, No-eul was still staring at it almost longingly.

જ⁀➴ Back at work, you were the only person she'd talk with during the breaks. Some of your co-workers would ask you how you gained her trust like that, since No-eul didn't even speak to them directly at all. You'd just shrug, not knowing how to answer them. Perhaps it was a bit strange how much she seemed to like you, but you certainly weren't complaining.

જ⁀➴ After some time, she'd open up to you about some of the things in her past and she explained her reason for living in her car with that she simply didn't have the money for an apartment. Apparently, she urgently needed it for something else, but she wouldn't tell you more about it. Just the fact No-eul was ready to share bits of her private life with you made your heart feel warm. You liked that she felt safe around you, and she did, too.

જ⁀➴ It got really late one night, so you offered her to sleep over at your place, since you probably owed her so much in gas money anyway. With a bit of hesitation, she'd accept, a genuine smile gracing her face. She was kind of forced to sleep in your bed as well, since your couch was just not big enough for one person to sleep on. No matter how much you apologized for that, No-eul would reassure you that this was more than fine and that she was really thankful you did this for her. She'd take your hand to squeeze it a couple of times to emphasize her words, even.

જ⁀➴ It felt like you two were teenage girls again, having a sleepover while you got ready for bed. No-eul showing you real emotions like happiness, excitement and gratefulness was so weird but also very appreciated by you. You never thought you'd come this close to her, shoulder on shoulder while laying together in your bed. Neither you or her minded it at all though and that was evident through the comfortable silence between you two. Not much had to be said in the moment for it to not be awkward.

જ⁀➴ When you woke up the morning after, No-eul was gone. You had figured that she'd probably be prone to do that, but you were still a bit baffled when finding the spot next to you cold and empty. She needed to get something done, that's at least what her text message said. This was typical No-eul, even if this was the first time this had happened.

જ⁀➴ No-eul wasn't able to get you out of her head. You were so irreducibly kind, soft spoken, pretty and just something that sge wasn't. Even back in the car she couldn't contain a smile when thinking about you, the conversations you had, your laugh, your face.. it wasn't like she didn't like it. She just wasn't used to this feeling at all ever since leaving her home years ago. But perhaps, just for you, she'd be ready to get used to it again.

[jiinxswife]

Jinx x fem!Reader NSFW alphabet

Trigger warnings: smut. Wtf did you expect from a NSFW alphabet? Image of hickeys on h

Thats my first time writing smut, I hope it doesn’t sucks completely-

A- after care

Cuddles, lots of cuddles and reassuring words, some teasing too

B- boundaries

I don’t think jinx has many boundaries, she was to try a bit of everything. I think the only things she wouldn’t be up to would be to be tied down or have a roleplay or something related to her hallucinations

C- cum

Jinx is definitely a squirter, her cum is lightly pink, like her tears. She makes a mess and won’t quite admit it, but likes to see you lick her clean

D- dirty secret

As mentioned on jinx’s relationship headcanons, she stalks you, Convincing herself that is to keep you safe. I also think that sometimes, when she’s on a longer mission or just wants to be well, horny by herself, she steals and gets off with some of your used panties yes she will hint you about it, no she will never admit, yes she does that to get your attention

E- eating out

If she’s eating you out, get ready for the most sloppy, desperate and whiny oral ever. She’s messy and desperate to make you feel good, she basically just laps at your folds, doing her best to get an orgasm out of you

F- favorite position

It really depends. If she’s using a strap on you, I think she’d like doggy style because of the wonderful view of your ass it gives her or missionary, because she loves to see your expression, same if you’re using a strap on her, I think that she’d like for you to see how good you’re making her feel. About orals, if she’s receiving, any position where she can tug at your hair, and if she’s giving, any where she can look at your face

G- goofy

Really goofy most of the time, some jokes and teasing, if you want her to shut up, you better keep her mouth busy

H- hickeys

Gives you hickeys all the time, I think that she’d give you hickeys that form a drawing, like a heart on your boobs or a “J” on your stomach

Something like that 👇

I- intimacy

Tells that she loves you at least once or twice; although she expects you to say it a lot more

J- jerk off

I think that she does that from time to time when she’s alone for long periods of time and gets bored. Don’t think she masturbates much without you to at least watch she likes the attention

K- kinks

I think her biggest kink is the praise kink, maybe even food play, like dropping chantilly on your boobs and licking it clean and I’m not sure if that’s a kink but she’d 100% draw on your naked body

L- location

Her bedroom or workplace. Principally against her messy workbench or on your shared bed

M- motivation, what keeps her going

Uh. Praises, praise her and she can go as long as you want. If you want to turn her on, just wear her stuff and kiss her neck

N- no

Will never ever consider a threesome or polyamorous relationship, if you ever even suggest, she will get pissed. Also a big no for “disgusting” stuff

O- open, how open is she for new people?

Completely closed, and you are too

P- peace

Idk man, she goes however she feels like, she’s a jinx, she’s chaotic, she will be fucking your brains out and then she will go slow and gentle

Q- quickie

Not the biggest fan, but it’s nice when she has to go to work or take care of isha and you two don’t have much time

R- risks

Girl, she’s definitely into public teasing. She will shove a vibrador down your pussy and walk around Zaun with you, teasing and making fun of you all the time. Will do that around everyone, poor Sevika, who gets traumatized once she understands why you’re sweating so much and so pissed off and whiny her only exception is Isha. She won’t do something like that around the kid

S- stamina

Has a lot of it, don’t expect her to get tired easily, once she starts, she wants to keep going forever

T- toys

Doesn’t lets you buy any, if you want one, she can make one herself! Expect it to be completely personalized so even if you decide to get off without her, you will still think about her

U- uuuuu- UTEASING (yes, teasing now starts with u)

Teases you a lot. Like, a hell lot, generally ruins your orgasm at least 2 times before actually giving it to you

V- volume

Loud. Really, really loud. Wants to make you see how good you make her feel, why would she hide if from you?

W- wet, how wet does she gets?

Really wet, and easily wet. She doesn’t touches herself much, nor had someone to do that for her before you, so her body almost craves it, she’s easily wet. Really wet

X- x-ray

Her clothes are short, you can see almost everything- matching, infantilized panties and bra. I think she definitely has a pair of ones with her favorite animals-

Y- yearning

Depends on the situation, place you’re in and mental health. In good times, generally three to four times a week, in bad ones, once a month

Z- zzz

Depends on the stage of the relationship. If the relationship is new and she doesn’t really feels secure, she will only fall asleep after you, once she trusts you more; you will find yourself cleaning her limp body as she snores softly

[lynnaredfield3383]

Not my characters. Aged up 21. Fem reader. Warning!!! Weight insecurities. Chubby reader insulted. Angst. Sex inflicted scratches/bites mentioned. (Understand Bokuto kept the secret because reader would break up with him if he didn't.)

"Wow. Yer girl is vicious,” Atsumu said as he passed Bokuto in the locker room.

Atsumu’s words had the rest of the team looking at Bokuto's back. Meanwhile, Bokuto laughed proud of the marks left by his girlfriend.

“Nah…She likes to bite and I'm all for it,” Bokuto spoke like a man whipped for his woman.

“When are we meeting this mystery girl?”

Hinata asked pulling his shirt on.

“I was thinking this weekend,” Bokuto shut his locker turning to his teammates.

“Is she shy or sumthin’?” Atsumu asked grabbing his bag.

Bokuto rubbed the back of his neck, not sure how to answer the question.

“Not normally, but she's not a big fan of athletes or volleyball.”

“How does that even work?” Kiyoomi asked.

“Look, she didn't want me to say anything, but we've been together for 8 months now and…”

“Eight months!!! You kept it a secret?” Hinata spoke in shock.

“She went to high school with Sumu.”

Everyone stopped what they were doing assuming what came next would be juicy gossip. They weren't wrong.

“Huh? Did we know each other?” Sumu asked surprised.

“Yeah. You insulted her. She's over it because it was high school, but she hasn't really wanted to meet the team because…Uh, she can't stand you.”

All eyes on Sumu, he himself was surprised. Insulting people on a daily basis through high school made it impossible for him to narrow down who it might be.

“You didn't call her an oinkin’ pig, did you?” Hinata asked.

“I…I don't know who it could be. I mean I insulted anyone that crossed my path but in fun, never hurtful.”

Bokuto looked really uncomfortable and grabbed his bag.

“Jellyroll. You called her a jellyroll because she was a little chubby.”

All the color drained from Sumu’s face, his heart stopped. Swallowing hard he met Bokuto's gaze.

“Y/n? Yer dating Y/n?” Sumu stuttered.

“Oh gee, looks like his brain stopped functioning,” Kiyoomi spoke bored.

“Yeah. She was sure you wouldn't remember her,” Bokuto said.

Sumu could never forget Y/n. He'd had a crush on her since 1st year and at the end of 2nd year after they'd lost at Nationals she'd come to support them. Sumu being angry and an idiot had told her to get lost. That he didn't need a jellyroll trying to make him feel better. When 3rd year came around Y/n had transferred schools and he'd never gotten a chance to apologize. Or to confess.

“I hurt her bad. Always felt awful ‘bout that,” Sumu nearly whispered.

“Well, you'll get the chance to apologize,” Hinata smiled brightly.

“Yeah. Maybe she'll start coming to the games,” Bokuto added.

“Okay, what does she look like now?” Meian finally spoke up.

Bokuto grinned happily, pulling out his phone and his favorite picture of Y/n. It was Y/n & Bokuto on a beach date. Y/n wore a black one piece bathing suit with the sides cut out.

“Wow.” Hinata whistled lowly.

“Those are some dangerous curves,” Meian added.

“Very pretty,” Kiyoomi offered with no energy.

Sumu hesitated, and when he looked, his heart stuttered. She was as beautiful as he remembered.

“Congrats man. Sorry, my high school self screwed things around for ya.”

"All good. Can't wait for the rest of you to meet her! Night!"

Hinata sat next to Astumu once the others left.

"Ya good?" Hinata asked.

"Not a bit. C'mon. You're my sober driver."

[adobe-outdesign]

Shiny Ralts line review?

(Grouping some of these together for efficiency's sake.)

Ralts, Kirlia, and Gardevoir: All three of these are pretty good, doing simple, consistent swaps; green to blue, red to orange, and adding a slight magenta tint to the white of the body. All of the colors are sort of adjacent to the original palette, but are still distinct enough that you'd never mistake these for the originals. And there's not much of a theme here color-wise, but the horns are meant to be vaguely representative of Gardevoir's heart, so the warm orange makes sense in that regard.

My only issue here is that Ralts seems to be slightly different shades of blue and orange than the rest of the line, and the body is way more magenta than the rest of the line. It might just be this specific render, but if it's not... uh, why?

Mega Gardevoir: Mega Gardevoir is nice and consistent, following the same color swaps as the rest of the line with the only exception being the lack of magenta tint on the body (which isn't really noticeable anyway). However, it ads a major twist by making the "dress" black, as opposed to regular mega Gardevoir where it's still white.

I'm not always big on shinies that randomly add a color to one part of the body because it can throw off the balance, but in this case, I think it works; Mega Gardevoir has very little color on it, so I understand wanting to do something to make the shiny more distinct. The black is a neutral that compliments the blue and orange, and it helps define the dress better than regular Mega Gardevoir does. I like this one a lot.

Gallade and Mega Gallade: Gallade follows the same pattern as the rest of the line, though it does bug me that it randomly uses a darker shade of blue for no real reason. It also has the addition of a third color to deal with, which is handled by swapping out blue for gray. I don't mind this—it's a nice neutral color—but I do think the gray is either too light or too dark, which causes it to vibrate against the blue pretty fiercely.

Mega Gallade is consistent with regular Gallade. No complaints here, though the contrast thing I mentioned with regular Gallade still applies here.

Overall: A very solid line of shinies that are both distinct from the originals and very consistent across the board. Mega Gardevoir's probably my favorite, but all of them are good.

[throatgoat4u]

hold me again

previous parts: part one | part two

word count: 1.3 k

summary: in a desperate attempt to see you again, matt succumbs to something so pathetic, and foolish. returning to the park every single day.

warnings: angst, mentions of cheating, obsessive behavior, unhealthy relationships, mental heath issues (kinda).

a/n: this may feel like really really repetitive but that the point! it’s supposed to be repetitive to make it sadder. like the whole thing is just one big repetition for a reason. i hope you like it. this part is the one that makes me cry so i hope it does the same to you!

matt was sick to his stomach after the encounter he had with you. it made him overthink every single bit of his relationship with victoria. did he really want to be with her or was he just trying to fill the void that you had left in him. either way, he was overthinking.

one thing matt was positive about was that he needed to see you again—to talk to you again. so, that led him to return to that very park bench, every single day.

everyday—whether it was after filming a car video, or doing absolutely nothing—he’d go to the park, sit at that same bench, and wait.

all day, his thoughts were plagued by you. the park, that day, you walking away, it replayed over, and over in his head. the regret of letting you go a second time weighed heavily on him. he was desperate to see you again. he knew you’d be mad if he showed up at the restaurant where you worked as a waitress, or at your apartment. so the bench was the next best thing he could manage.

at this point, going to the park was second nature; it was in his routine. on a busy day, he’d wake up, do all his work, and then immediately rush to the park and sit at the bench for the remainder of the day. on a not-so-busy day, the moment he finished his morning routine, he’d head to the park. matt was usually the type to wake up at around 1pm. but now? now he woke up at 8:30 every morning so he could get whatever it was that he had to do done so that he could spend the rest of the day there.

he’d go, sit on the same bench, and pray. he’d pray, and pray, and pray that you would show up. he didn’t know if you would—he was more than sure you wouldn’t—but he always kept hope in his heart that you would. the thought of you never returning, the thought of never being able to see you again, drove him insane. so instead, he’d sit there, and the whole time, to distract himself from reality, he’d make up scenarios in his head. some scenarios were about what would happen when you’d come back. he’d imagine you in that same white dress, running up to him with that beautiful smile on your face and giving him a big kiss, telling him you missed him. other times, he’d imagine the life you two could’ve had if he had never done what he did. he missed you. all this time, he missed you. but he could never admit it to anyone. he could never tell a soul how much he wanted to see you again.

the entire time, he was filled with hope. he’d always come to the park, ready, and hopeful—beaming with excitement as he sat down, and waited. though, the results were always the same. complete and utter disappointment.

but matt—being matt— was stubborn. the constant disappointment was not going to deter him. if anything, it fueled his resolve. every time he came home, he told himself tomorrow was going to be the day. tomorrow you’d show, and it would all be worth it. he held onto that thought like it was a lifeline, even as the days turned into weeks. 

his friends began to notice his absence from their usual outings, and victoria… well, she was beginning to piece things together. she confronted him quite a few times, asking why he was always gone, and why he seemed so distant lately. his answer was always the same, he was working. it wasn’t all a lie, he reasoned. waiting for you was work. grueling, heart-wrenching, and entirely self-imposed, but work nonetheless.

this continued for a while. him coming home late, victoria confronting him, him using the same excuse, and then them getting into an argument. victoria couldn’t take it anymore, she was sure he was cheating. so she packed all her stuff into bags, wrote him a letter, leaving it on the table, and left.

when matt came home that night, he saw the letter on the table. all he needed to read was the first sentence before he stopped caring. over the few weeks he spent at the park bench, his love for her had slowly started to fade as he realized it was you he loved. it always has been you, it always will be you.

soon enough, the weeks were turning into months. where were you? there’s no way you haven’t once been to the park. the thought gnawed at him day and night. maybe he had missed you. maybe he had gone for a coffee run at the wrong time, or had left a minute too early. nonetheless, those thoughts were eating him alive. the possibility of him missing you haunted him, and he started to grow paranoid. so—like any logical human being—he started to stay longer, arriving earlier, leaving later, completely cutting his coffee runs out of the schedule. even then, he never saw you—you never showed.

matt was slowly going insane. he started to analyze the faces of passersby, just incase one of them was you in disguise. it sounded ridiculous, but at this point, matt wasn’t necessarily running on logic anymore. he was running on the need to see you, hug you, hold you. he knew he was driving himself to insanity, but he found himself caring less and less about his own personal being. 

december was slowly approaching but that didn’t stop him. he started wearing more and more layers. base layers, two long sleeve t shirts, a hoodie, a jacket, and then a coat on top. he wasn’t going to give up. he couldn’t… he couldn’t.

the park was dusted with snow. it was cold, and dark, but matt still sat there, not budging even if he was still shivering through all his layers. there was no way you’d show. why would you be at a park in this freezing weather? but his paranoia—the small voice in his head—kept him there. he was fearful that the second he’d get up, and leave, you’d magically appear at the bench. so he waited. he waited for you to magically appear.

his teeth had began to chatter, his nose turned red, and his lips blue. he could barely feel any part of his body, especially not his ass. he shoved his gloved hands into the pockets of his coat and pulled the hood up over his beanie, but it did little to warm him up. he was going to get hypothermia at this rate. 

he really should’ve gone by now, he knew he should’ve been gone hours ago. but, he couldn’t bring himself to get up, he couldn’t bear the thought of leaving right before you came. so he remained seated. his leg bouncing up and down, trying to get some movement in that would hopefully warm up his body.

the world around him seemed to slow as the biting cold settled deeper into his bones. matt’s breath puffed out in visible clouds of smoke, the only sign of him still being alive and stubbornly clinging to hope. he tried to distract himself, playing back his memories of you—your laugh, the way your eyes lit up when you were excited about something, the way you’d sound saying his name. it wasn’t enough to keep the cold away, but it was enough to keep him there.

“hey are you alright?” a familiar voice from behind him called out.

he froze in an instant. that voice… no… no, it couldn’t be. could it? could it really be you?

he turned his head around, looking at the face that matched the voice. it was her. it was his girl, his doll. it was the girl he had spent almost a year and a half at a bench for. it was the girl he longed for every second of the day. 

his chest tightened, and for a moment, he thought he might actually stop breathing. you were standing there, looking just as he remembered—maybe even better, if that was even possible. the cold had painted a faint blush over your cheeks, snowflakes speckled in your hair, sparkling like tiny stars under the dim light.

 it was you. it was really you.

a/n: i know the breakup with matt and veronica isn't long, i just needed her out of the way and could not be bothered with writing a long ass breakup.

toodles sluts :)

[osohchoso]

Blood and Chains

Chapter Five- Is There Someone Else?

Choso x F!reader

Previous | Chapter Index | Next

Content: fluff, date night, keeping secrets, reader has trust issues, small mention of blood, suggestive content MDNI

Every detail of that night remains burned into your brain. The way he looked at you, the way he smelled, the way he tasted. It was a night you will never forget for years to come. The day you were finally able to start calling him your boyfriend. 

That night, he slept in the bed next to you, instead of curled up on the couch all alone. You changed into your favorite pair of pjs for him, a silky pink set consisting of shorts and a cropped cami top. When he saw you in it, you swear he almost fainted. So used to seeing you in just casual or comfy clothes, never something as revealing as this. Though, part of you hoped that they will be on the floor by the end of the night. 

He joined you under the sheets a moment later, wearing only a pair of deep purple pajama pants. Your eyes roamed over his shirtless body, finally able to take in his muscular form. Large pecs and sculpted abs, he resembled a Greecian statue. Slipping in under the covers, you instantly wrapped your arms around his body. Hands feeling the hard muscles underneath his scar lined skin. Fingertips tracing lines that follow the shape of the rough marks, a story of hardships etched into him, his body tensing with each touch.

He tilted your chin up to look at him, lips parted as he gazed deeply into your eyes. Within the next second, his lips are pressed against yours. Tasting your own cherry chapstick off his soft lips. Your teeth gently graze his bottom lip, sucking lightly. A small moan escapes him and he returns the favor. Strong hand gripping the hair at the back of your head, tilting your jaw up toward the ceiling. He leaves feather light kisses down your neck, stopping at your collar bone to leave a soft bite. Heat pools to your core, your hand sliding down his stomach toward the waistband of his pants. 

Before your hand reaches the edge of his clothing, his free hand grabs your wrist to stop you. Holding your hand gently in the palm of his own while looking into your eyes. His breath coming out in quick pants, heart pounding out of his chest.

“How about…we just cuddle for the night?” He speaks gently, offering a soft smile. The hand behind your head moves to sweep a strand of hair from your face, now unable to hide behind it during your embarrassment of being caught. His other hand releases your hand he was clutching, and you retract it to yourself.

“Sorry…I was just caught up in the moment I guess.” you blush and look away, slightly ashamed. It has been a while since you have been intimate with anyone. You started to get a bit excited to have someone who looks the way he does, your now boyfriend, in your bed. He cups your cheek, rubbing his rough thumb over your soft skin.

“You have no reason to apologize, because if I’m honest I want that too…but I also don't want to rush things with you.” he brings his nose to yours, nuzzling against you. “And waiting will make it so much sweeter” he whispers low. Your face heats immediately underneath your skin and a low rumble of laughter vibrates in his throat. You set your burning head down against his chest, the fire on your cheeks seeping into his skin. The steady beat of his heart pumping against your ear as it lulls you to sleep. 

That was the best sleep of your life you decided the next morning. Choso really is like a big cuddly teddy bear, wrapping his arms around you the whole night. Enveloping you in his warmth. You wanted to spend the whole next morning in bed, bodies pressed against each other, but reality had other plans. 

Buzz buzz! Choso’s phone rings, he picks it up and frowns at the incoming call.

“Sorry this is work, I need to take this.” He gets out of bed and walks to the other room, shutting the door behind him. You can hear him speaking sternly in the other room, his voice just barely low enough that you can't decipher the words he's saying. A few minutes later he returns, wearing an expression of annoyance.

“I'm sorry… I'm needed at work” he leans down to kiss your forehead. “I'll call you later okay?” 

“Okay” you smile, trying to hide the disappointment of his abrupt departure. You were hoping to be able to enjoy a relaxing Saturday morning with him. Making him a cup of coffee, cooking breakfast together, watching some TV in your pjs. Something so simple and domestic yet it sounded perfect. He easily saw right through the fake happy mask you wore to hide your true feelings. Reaching down, he grabs your hand and lifts it up close to his lips, planting a soft kiss to the back of your hand.

“I promise. I'll call you as soon as I'm done working” he whispers against your skin, thumb skimming lightly over your knuckles. With that, he gathers his things and leaves. He kept his promise too, the second he got home he called you right away, asking all about your day.

˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　　 . ✦　　　 　˚　　　　 . ★⋆.

A few more weeks pass by, and Choso's girlfriend comes so naturally. Texting all day long, calling each other at the end of the night until you both pass out on the line. He visits you more often now too, spending the night holding you to him as his little spoon each time. You started buying extra toiletries for when he visits and he leaves spare clothing and other items around the apartment, a constant reminder of his presence. Still, you haven't gotten intimate together yet. The mystery of what lies beneath each other's clothing testing both of you. While waiting is a tease, you still don't mind. Knowing the anticipation is just going to make your first time together so much more special.

You enjoy every second with him, despite the rules he put in place. Choso had insisted on two major rules at the start of this relationship. He wanted to keep you a secret, insisting it was for your own safety. You were skeptical, feeling like maybe he was ashamed to be seen with you in public, but you agreed still. Deciding to put all your faith in him.

The first rule was not to tell anyone about your relationship. This killed you, because you wanted everyone to know. You wanted to take pictures together to post on your socials, to tell your friends, to shout it from the rooftop. The other rule is not to be seen in public together. Another let down as you were excited to go out on a real date with him, and not be stuck in your apartment watching movies every time. He doesn't even invite you over to his own apartment, always just coming to visit yours. He claims he put these rules in place for your own safety, and reminds you of it every time you complain about it. This is kind of annoying, but you hope that in time, things will change. 

Choso, however, has broken both of his own rules. How could he keep such a big secret from his little brother? Yuji would have started to suspect it sooner or later anyways with how often his brother was absent from his own home, and Choso didn't want to have to make excuses. So he decided to tell him the truth immediately, making Yuji swear on his LIFE to keep it a secret. Choso also couldn't resist visiting the café you work at. Coming in, he pretends to be just a casual acquaintance to any watching eyes. Part of you thinks he really is only coming to satisfy his caffeine addiction. Though the longing looks and the purposeful brush of his fingers against yours tells you otherwise. 

Sunday morning, you enter the café bright and early for an opening shift. It was hard for you to leave the bed, Choso still peacefully asleep next to you. You practically had to pry his arms off your waist as he held you in his sleep. Part of you really debated on calling in today, just jumping back in bed and dozing off again. But you didn't, the fact that you were the only one working the opening shift, that no one would be available until noon, swayed your thoughts. Moving slowly, you change into your work uniform, fixing your bedhead and applying some light makeup so you look somewhat alive this early. Glancing at Choso every so often, watching the steady rise and fall of his chest, his fingers twitching from your absence. Before leaving you planted a few quick kisses to his forehead, he hums softly in response.

Once the café opened for the day, you were immediately hit with a rush of people. Many the same age as you, looking like they are hungover and seen better days. You laughed to yourself remembering the last time you and your friends went out drinking. You and Emi trying to support the weight of Suki as she stumbles out of the club. It was a miracle you all made it home still in your heels considering how much the three of you drank. That was before you met Choso, you haven't seen them much after meeting him. Rescheduling your plans with them to give yourself more time with him and his busy life whenever you can. You make a mental note to plan a night with your girls soon.

After the rush passes, you brew yourself a cup of coffee. You will need the energy to keep going the rest of the day. You pull your phone out to check for any messages from Choso, wondering if he's still in bed or if he will be there waiting at the end of your work day. The front door swings open and you quickly push your phone back in the pocket of your apron. 

“Welcome in!” You say cheerfully, eyes closed shut as you wear a big smile. When you open your eyes you spy a familiar pink haired boy. A wide grin on his face as he stands in front of the counter, wearing that navy blue uniform with the golden buttons, a red hood sticking out from underneath. 

“Hey Y/N” he continues to smile, waving excitedly.

“Yuji!?” you ask in disbelief, Choso has shown you enough pictures of his little brother that you recognize him immediately. You pinch yourself, thinking the caffeine rushed to your head and created a hallucination. What is he doing here? He leans on the counter, elbows resting on the wood, hands propping his head up as he looks at you.

“So you're the one who stole my brother's heart” he laughs warmly. “I'm glad…he's been needing someone, and from what he's said you're very kind. He needs someone like you.” 

“Thanks” You twirl a loose string of your apron as he showers you with compliments. “Still…why are you here Yuji?”

“Oooh I was just stopping by between jobs, and thought I should meet my big bro's girlfriend for myself” he smirks. “Plus he says this place has the best coffee”

“You're not wrong…I'll make you something” you tell him. As you brew him a latte, extra sweet like he asked, you wonder how much Choso has told his brother about you. Clearly, he's not following his own rules but expects you to. He tells his brother everything about but you can't even tell your friends you're no longer single. He visits you at work yet you can't even come to his apartment. It's a double standard and it's starting to bother you more than you want to admit. You set the coffee down in front of Yuji, brows still furrowed in thought.

“You okay?” he asks, taking a sip of the hot drink.

“Yeah, I'm fine” you do your best to soften your expression, trying to wear a disguise that hides your fears, trying to convince yourself that everything is ok. Yuji raises an eyebrow, clearly not buying it. Just as perceptive as his big brother, easily seeing right through you.

“You can tell me. I know we have only just officially met…but I already know so much from all of Choso's yapping. I feel like I've known you my whole life.” Yuji giggles, you can't help but join in.

“I could say the same. I know almost everything there is about you thanks to him.”

“My brother gets like that when he really cares for someone.” Yuji smiles, stirring the coffee. “Come on, tell me what's wrong.”

“Okay…” you take a deep breath, gathering the thoughts before you voice your concerns. “I guess, I just don't like hiding our relationship. It makes me feel like he's hiding something from me.” You frown as you speak these words out loud for the first time. You want to trust him, but your past makes you over analyze every little thing. “I just worry about how he really feels about me” Yuji's usually cheerful face turns serious.

“I promise you, Choso really cares for you. He does. You have to be one of the most important people in his life, probably even surpassed me at this point.” He flashes a smirk at you before continuing. “Choso can be…overprotective. That's just how he is, trust me. The first year I lived with him he acted like a helicopter parent, never letting me do anything on my own. So he's just taking precautions for what he feels is best to keep you safe, even if it comes off as overbearing and sneaky.” 

“His last relationship ended horribly, I don't know what he's told you about her. It’s not my place to say, but I think he will open up when he's ready. I think he's really scared of messing things up or getting hurt again.” Yuji continues, a glimmer of sadness in his eyes as he thinks back on his brother’s heartbreak. “It was really rough on him, I never want to see him go through that again. He’s always trying to be the big, capable older brother for me…but sometimes I need to take care of him too. Promise me you'll treat him right?” Yuji looks at you with big pleading eyes. You reach out and grab one of his hands, looking into his golden-brown irises.

“I promise Yuji! I would never ever dream of hurting Choso.” You intend to keep every word of this promise. You release Yuji's hand. “I just wish we could have a normal relationship. I want to walk in the park with him, go out for drinks with my friends. I don't like being a secret” You frown as you imagine the normal relationship you dream of.

“I'll talk to him. I think he's acting a little excessively. He might listen to me if I try to reason with him.” Yuji finishes his drink and hands the empty mug back to you. 

“See you around” he waves as he exits the cafe.

“Bye Yuji, take care” you call after him.

˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　　 . ✦　　　 　˚　　　　 . ★⋆.

The next few days come and go, you haven't seen Choso once since Sunday morning before you left for work. He was called into a job before you could make it back to your apartment. Since then, your work schedules haven't been lining up to see each other. The time you did have off of your job was spent working on the final project for this semester and studying for exams. Instead, you have to settle for long late-night chats with your boyfriend at the end of each day. Still, you missed his physical presence.

It's odd for you to have a Thursday evening off, all you had was morning classes and it was the last day of the semester at that. Now you're off of school until the coming fall. It's even more rare for you to have work off the following day. Though you have no complaints, you settle down into your couch and prepare to start reading the book Choso bought for you a week ago. A vampire romance novel, he thought you might like it because of how much you like Twilight. 

Before you can even open the book, you pull your phone out and think about inviting Choso over. Hoping that by chance he would have some free time tonight too. You prepare to type a message, but you receive one from him before you can even hit send.

Choso: Hey little flower, what are you doing?

You can't control your smile. He started calling you that cute pet name the day you two became official. You're not sure how he came up with it, but each time it never fails to brighten your day.

You: Nothing actually, I'm off today and tomorrow.

Choso: Perfect, I'm almost there!

You stop suddenly. He's on his way?? A surprise visit is so unexpected from him.

You: What would you have done if I said I wasn't home??

Choso: Be sad :/

Choso: I'm coming with a surprise!

Your head buzzes in excitement for what he could be surprising you with. Quickly, you rush to the bedroom to change out of your lazy day sweats and into something nicer. Pulling out a flowy maroon dress that is both cute and casual. You say a silent thank you for the fact you decided to shave yesterday, legs looking smooth and flawless. Glancing in the mirror, you make a few touch ups to your hair and makeup. As you stand back to admire yourself, you hear a key turn in the front door. It startles you at first but then you remember giving Choso his own key to lock up when you leave for work while he's fast asleep.

You bounce down the hallway, excited to see him. He stands by the kitchen table, wearing tan pants and a black button up shirt, the sleeves rolled up to his elbow and the top few buttons undone, showing a peek of his bare chest underneath. His hair styled loosely, free from the pigtails today. Having his hair down is one of your weaknesses and he knows it. Seeing him like he is now takes your breath away. Completely lost for words.

“You look beautiful” he smirks as he takes in your appearance. He walks forward, holding a bouquet of deep red roses. “Some flowers for my little flower” he leans down to kiss your cheek and thrusts the bouquet into your arms.

“Cho…you're so thoughtful. And, wow…you look amazing.” Your cheeks flush slightly as turn your head toward the roses, briefly pressing your nose into them and breathing in the aroma. “What are you doing here anyway?” you ask as you move to retrieve a vase from under the kitchen sink, filling it up with water. 

“Well, tomorrow is our one-month anniversary, you know.” You giggle at his explanation, not expecting him to want to celebrate something as small as one month. “And I was off work tonight and tomorrow, I couldn't wait to come see you. I just had to surprise you.” His eyes crinkle up in a genuine smile, one you love to see him wear.

“Are you taking me out!?” you blurt out excited as you place the roses into the vase. His smile falters slightly.

“No. Not out. Yuji has been trying to convince me to stop worrying so much but I don't want you to become a target. It's not safe, please believe me.” 

“I believe you Choso” you sigh as you rearrange the roses inside the vase. He moves to stand right behind you, his hard chest pressed against your back. His breath tickles your ear as he exhales.

“But I still wanted to treat you to a date night. I want to show you how special you are to me.” His fingers gently move the hair away from your shoulder, his other hand holding you tightly around the waist. He lowers his face to meet the bare skin of your neck, inhaling your scent. Lips begin peppering your soft skin in kisses, eliciting a soft gasp from your mouth. He moves from your shoulder, up your neck and finally your ear. “I missed you so much” he whispers before nibbling your earlobe. 

“I missed you too” you turn your head to look at him. He smiles, satisfied with your response to his touch. He releases you from his grip and backs up, leaning against the kitchen table.

“I thought we could cook dinner together. No ordering out, no movie. Just a nice dinner, you and me.” you glance over to the counter and notice a couple paper bags marked with the logo of a local grocery store.

“That sounds great, Choso. What are we making?”

“I thought maybe we could make a salad and some pasta” he moves over to the bags on the counter. “Are you hungry?” He asks you. Your stomach growls in response.

“Yes…I am” you admit with a laugh. “Are you a good chef, Cho?” you ask.

“I like to think I am. I'll let you decide after tasting my cooking.” He walks over to your cupboard and starts rummaging through, looking for the utensils he needs. He found a large pot and began to fill it with water. “I only recently started cooking when I moved in with Yuji. He showed me that there is so much more to food than just nourishing your body. There are so many different tastes to explore. The first year we lived together I swear I gained 20 extra pounds” he laughs.

“I'm not a very good cook” you admit as you watch him place the pot on the stove burner. “I'm better at baking.” He smiles and pats you on the top of the head with his large hand, messing your hair up slightly.

“That's okay, you can help with an easy task. How about the salad?” He hands you one of the paper bags. You peer inside and notice different ingredients to create a Caesar salad. “And maybe later you can whip us up a sweet treat. Or maybe I'll just have you for dessert” he pokes your nose with a smirk on his face before turning back to the pot to add the dry linguine noodles to the boiling water.

“Damn tease” you mumble, rubbing your nose where his finger touched. You move to the counter next to the stove and start adding the lettuce and croutons to a wooden salad bowl. All that's left, besides the dressing, is to add the cheese. You pull out a cheese grater and begin to shred a block of parmesan into the bowl. You glance over at Choso and watch as he starts to work on making a sauce in a smaller pot. No store bought from a jar sauce, no, he is making it from scratch. Using a mix of various ingredients, like fresh cream and cheese. The smell is absolutely divine. You admire watching him, his insane focus on the concoction, how his arm muscles bulge as he stirs the wooden spoon around.

“Fuck!” You shout suddenly. In your distracted state, your hand slipped, slicing the side of your index finger across the cheese grater. 

“What's wrong!” he drops the spoon immediately, letting it fall on the floor with a loud plop! Creamy sauce splattering everywhere. Panic spreads across his face as he searches yours.

“It's nothing, just cut myself a little.” your thumb on the opposite hand holds the cut, applying pressure. His concern doesn't subside. He lifts you up onto the only free counter space left, having you sit on it with your legs dangling off.

“Let me see” he holds his hand out. You show him your finger, a few fresh beads of blood forming the second your thumb releases the pressure. “It's not bad,” he admits. Moving to the sink, he grabs a few squares of paper towel, wetting it under the faucet. He gently cleans the cut, using light touches to not irritate the skin further. Then he finds the band aids you keep under the sink, wrapping one around your finger. 

“My precious little flower, you need to be careful.” he whispers, bringing your hand up close to his mouth so he can apply a kiss on top of the bandaged finger. He moves back to clean up the mess from when he dropped the spoon. You go to jump off the counter to return to making the salad but puts his hands up to stop you. “Nope. No more sharp objects for you. Just sit there and look pretty for me alright” he smirks.

“Aww but I still want to help” you pout, he shakes his head. 

“Sorry, cooking is now off limits for you, my clumsy girl. Just sit back and watch me” he throws away the paper towels and retrieves a new spoon from the drawer. You watch him as he goes bad stirring the pot. Spooning out a small amount and lifting it to his mouth, tasting the mixture. His pink tongue darts out to lick some of the cream off his lips, his throat bobbing as he swallows. He lets out a hum of contentment.

He scoops another spoonful, this time moving to stand in front of you on the counter. His body positioned between your legs, the spoon hoovering before your lips. 

“Want to try?” He asks. You nod, opening your mouth for him as he moves the spoon closer. You wrap your lips around it, holding eye contact with him as you taste it. It tastes absolutely delicious. Rich and creamy, layers of cheese, a hint of something spicy. 

“Wow Cho! This is...amazing!” You watch as his face lights up at your praise. 

˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　　 . ✦　　　 　˚　　　　 . ★⋆.

Dinner was phenomenal. Never have you had such a good meal in your life, and never would you have guessed Choso was that good of a chef. You definitely want him to cook for you more often, especially if you get to play the part of princess on the counter, not having to lift a finger as you watch. Though, since he did all the cooking, you decided to do all the cleaning. There wasn't a ton of a mess to clean up anyways, just a couple dishes used to create the meal.

While you were in the kitchen cleaning up, Choso excused himself to the bedroom. He promised to return momentarily but he was taking a suspiciously long time. You finish drying the last plate and place it back into the cupboard. As you do, you hear Choso calling your name from the bedroom. You follow the sound of his voice and see him sitting on your bed. The lights in the room off, but several candles are lit and scattered around, setting the mood. Giving the area an aura of romance. 

To your disappointment, Choso had changed out of his outfit from earlier. No longer is he wearing those form fitting pants and open buttoned shirt, trading it for something new entirely. But much to your delight, he sits on the bed completely shirtless, his well sculpted muscles on full display. On his legs, he wears dark gray shorts with a dangerously short inseam. The contour of the muscles in his thighs catch your attention, and it takes all your strength to not run up and cover his quads in bites. 

“Choso...” your breath catches in your throat slightly, eyes scanning the setup of the room. He smirks at you confidently as he rises from the edge of the bed. “What's going on?” You ask, a slight heat gracing your cheeks as you imagine what he might want to spend the rest of the night doing.

“I have another surprise for you” he walks toward you, holding a hand out and motioning for yours. You place your hand into his palm and he wraps his fingers around it. He leads you over to the bed. “I thought it would be nice to give you a massage tonight.” He continues. “I know your classes have been stressing you out lately and I haven't really been around to help you. I want to do something special for you tonight.” You sit down on the edge of the bed, Choso bending down to rest his forehead against yours. 

“You're so sweet Cho” you reach a hand up to twirl a strand of his hair.

“Anything for you” he leans in further, face close to your neck. His lips brush gently on your exposed collar bone, leaving a few light kisses there before he moves up to meet your lips. You kiss him back, matching his passion, getting lost in the moment before he stands tall in front of you. “Now lay down and get comfortable” he smirks while cracking his knuckles. 

You lay back and turn over, situating yourself on your stomach. The bed creaks as Choso positions himself over you, his knees resting on either side of your upper thighs. Reaching forward, his index finger hooks one of your dress straps around your shoulder.

“It will be easier if you slip this off. You don't even need to take it off fully, just so I have access to your back.” He whispers. You realize he is right, and slip your dress down your body until it looks nothing more than a skirt clinging around your waist. “Much better” he whispers. You feel his weight shift as he settles on the back of your thighs.

His hands move to your shoulders, brushing your bra straps down your arms to give him better access to where he needs to focus. His fingers move slowly and methodically, making circles into the muscles. Your shoulders have been tight lately, with you hunched over your desk working on your final project for one class or studying on your laptop with another. As his fingertips dig into your skin you can practically feel the tension melting away along with all the stress from the previous semester.

“That feels great Cho” You hum, a sigh of contentment escaping you. He briefly moves up your neck, carefully not to apply too much pressure to this sensitive spot. Then his large hands travel down your upper back, smooth rhythmic strokes to ease your pain. Choso is paying attention to how your body responds under every touch, adjusting his technique as necessary to make this the most relaxing experience possible. No one has ever treated you with this much care, this much attention. Hell, no one has ever even offered to massage you like this before. His fingers trace around the edge of your bra, poking the clasp at your back.

“Can I?” he asks hesitantly.

“Yes” you reply, barely a whisper. 

He unhooks the bra effortlessly, your back bare before him. Returning to his role as massage therapist, he works up and down your back. Applying varying depths and pressure, making sure to hit every screaming muscle you have. He's relaxing you so much that you are on the brink of sleep, eyes closed but fighting mentally to stay conscious. The soothing smell of lavender and vanilla radiating from the candles. In this state of bliss, you completely lose track of how much time has passed. It could have been 10 minutes or 2 hours, there was no way to tell.

Just as you are about to drift away to a quiet dream, you snap back to reality. Choso's fingers now replaced with his lips as he leaves your back covered in tender kisses. You shiver beneath him. His fingers dig into your exposed hip as he kisses up your spine toward your neck. Leaving a hot trail where his lips touch your skin. 

“God…you drive me wild” he growls into your ear. You can feel his arousal growing, resting firmly against your ass. Burning heat radiating from his clothes through yours. Heat that your body mirrors in response, instinctually craving him just as he does you. 

“Choso…I want you..” you murmur softly. His body seems to move on it's own, holding your hips against his as he grinds slowly against you. A tantalizing rhythm that makes you want more, need more. You flip over to face him, gazing up at him. His face immediately flushes pink at the sight of your exposed breasts, unable to tear his eyes away. You feel his hard cock throb through his shorts. Your admission was all he needed to continue.

“I need you…so bad” he whispers, your name falling off his tongue like a desperate prayer. With help from his fumbling hands, the two of you slide the rest of the dress off your body, leaving you only in a pair of black lace panties. You wrap your legs around him to pull him closer to you, his face inches above yours as he looks down with hungry dark eyes. The thick outline of his aching length twitching in the confines of his shorts as he fucks you with his eyes.

With one hand, he locks his fingers with yours holding it hostage above your head. His other leaves a trail of light touches over your waist and up to cup your breast. Thumb brushing lightly over your nipple, causing a soft moan to escape your throat.

“You're so beautiful” he breathes out onto your lips before crashing his mouth to yours. Enveloping you in a soft yet possessive kiss. Your free hand travels down his toned body, reaching the hard length restricted to his gray shorts. His teeth grasp your bottom lip with a gentle tug as you palm him through the thin clothing. Releasing your lip with a low moan, he looks down at you. Panting, eyebrows upturned, a pure picture of need and desperation. Your own breathing quickens as you reach for the waistband of his shorts, you need to feel him against your skin.

Buzz buzz!! Before you can remove his clothing, the vibrations of his phone on the nightstand rudely interrupt you. He grumbles and attempts to disentangle himself from you, releasing your hand he had held captive. Though your legs refuse to release him from your grip.

“Sweetheart” he murmurs, looking at you. “I need to check that…it could be important” he frowns.

“Choso…” you pout as you reluctantly release his waist from your thighs. He pushes himself off the bed to walk over to the phone. His eyebrows furrowed in irritation as he unlocks it to read the message. You know it can only mean one thing, his stupid boss sprung a stupid last-minute job on him. “Don't leave me tonight…not like this” you sit up on the edge, crossing your arms over your bare chest. He lets a long and frustrated sigh.

“I'm so sorry, little flower. They always do this to me, but it should just be a quick job. I promise. I'll be gone maybe an hour and a half tops.” He walks over to the overnight bag he brought, pulling out a familiar uniform with gold buttons.

“Can't you just ignore them? You were supposed to have today off” you shift on the bed, crossing your legs as you watch him change. He turns around, buttoning the last golden circle near the collar.

“No, I can't. Trust me, I wish I could, but it's not possible. I think they would kill me if I tried.” His eyebrows pressed in a tight v as he imagines the consequences. “I'll be back soon. I promise you, and then we can continue this” he smirks slightly before cupping your pouting face in his hands and planting three sweet kisses to your forehead.

“Be safe,” you whisper. 

“I will. I'll be back soon” he promises before turning to exit the room. You listen as he makes his way out of the apartment, hearing the click in the door as he locks it behind him.

You lay back on the bed with a frustrated sigh, staring up at the ceiling fan. A million questions plague your thoughts, brought on by your own mistrust through past relationships. Am I not good enough? Is he not attracted to me? Did I do something wrong? Is there someone else? You want to trust Choso, you really do. He doesn't seem the type to cheat and sneak around, but he's just so secretive sometimes that you can't help but doubt him.

It was your last relationship that ruined you, that made you like this. That completely broke your trust, stomped all over your heart. The only person you have ever been in love with. You were with him for a year, and he made you feel…special. Showering you with love and kisses, presents every time he saw you. You never suspected a thing. You fell head over heels, and thought he felt the same. Eventually you saw through the lies, the deception. He was sneaking out after sleeping with you, ghosting your dates that were planned weeks in advance, coming up with excuses like ‘work’. You tried pushing those thoughts away, telling yourself he loves me. It wasn't until you saw a message on his phone from another girl that forced you to connect the dots. While you knew it was wrong, you looked through all his messages. Seeing countless different girls and hookups, all under the impression they were his girlfriend too. That was the end, a year wasted with a piece of trash like him.

But Choso is different. He is genuine, and he's kind. He shows you his love and care both through his words and his actions. Your night wouldn't have felt this special if it was all an act. Surely his own brother wouldn't have defended him so loyally if this meant nothing. Unless he was also given misinformation. He wouldn't lie, wouldn't cheat on you. Right?

The secrets, the mysterious job he hides from you. It reopens the wound of mistrust. You refuse to fall into the darkness again, refuse to be hurt by another man. You just need one answer, one confirmation that he's as loyal as you want to believe he is. 

Before you know it, you're changed. Wearing skintight black leggings and a shirt, covering your head in a dark beanie. This is stupid, you tell yourself as you reach for the door handle to exit the apartment. Nausea bubbles in your stomach, threatening to vomit up the pasta from dinner. You slip into the shadows of the street, avoiding the dim lights from the passing buildings and the streetlamps. You wish you could make yourself go back inside and sit on the couch and wait for his return. But something needs to ease the growing seed of worry inside. Just to make sure he's not sneaking off to another girl, to confirm you're his one and only. To protect yourself.

In the distance, you can barely make out his outline, he hasn't gotten far. His hair now pulled back up in his usual pigtail fashion, bouncing around under the streetlights. Keeping your distance, you tail him. Concealing yourself to the shadows as you follow.

You wish you would have just turned back to the safety of your apartment, as this night unfolds into a nightmare. The night everything goes wrong.

dividers by @thecutestgrotto

Taglist: @lavenderdaydream97 @angel04-01

Likes, comments and reblogs greatly appreciated :) <3

[wlwsoccerfics]

Girl of my Dreams(Sara DoorsounXReader Feat Fletcher)

Warning: swearing, mentions of s*xual content

You and Sara have been dating for around 8 months now. Basically since you transfered from Wolfsburg to Frankfurt. Originally you have been from New York City. Your dad is American while your Mom is from germany.

The brunette was so excited to go to a Fletcher Concert with you. You did manage to hide the fact that you weren't looking forward to that at all. Not because her music was bad because it wasn't, but more because quite a few Songs were about you. The two of you used to date when you and her were like 17 years old.

So the fact that you two were invited to Go backstage because Sara talked about your ex on social Media and said how much she enjoyed her music made you feel sick. Somewhat in your mind you were hoping cari wouldn't make it known that you knew one another when you would go to her concert but of course that was most likely wishful thinking.

The two of you won't be going alone though. No Laura & Stina would be going with you. This was probably gonna make it even more awkward. But you just couldn't get yourself to admit that the songs your girlfriend liked so much were partly about you. Like 'S*x with my ex' or 'wasted youth' yeah those for example.

A little while later that day the four of you were having some lunch at a little Café close to the venue in Cologne where the Concert would be. Turned out luck really was never on your side because sure as hell Cari (Fletcher) walked in with her best friend Alex and her band. Even worse for you, both Cari & Alex noticed you right away walking over to you. "Y/n! Long time no see!" Alex spoke up. "Yeah it's has been quite the few years!" You replied. "You still look like a fucking dream!" Cari told you. What you also noticed was the eyes of Stina, Laura and Sara, your girlfriend were on the two of you. "Wait you call her Cari? And she said you STILL look like a dream? Do you know her personally?" Sara wanted to know. Alex was too quick to answer so you couldn't slowly let your girlfriend in on this. "They know every Inch of one another." She told your girlfriend and your friends. "Alex!" You and Cari spat out at the same time. "We were a couple, in high school." You explained. "And hooked up a few times when we were like 19. After that we didn't really communicate much. Just a Message whenever one of us had a Birthday." You explained "Some Songs are about me but Babe i promise that it doesn't mean anything. I only love you!" You were really stressed out about this. And for sure did regret not telling your girlfriend about it. Stina & Laura just stared back and forth between you, sara and cari. "You didn't think mentioning that the Artist i like happens to be someone you slept with?! And some Songs are about you?! Babe that's not cool!"Sara answered. At least she still called you babe so things were still fixable. Good for you! "I know Babe! I am so sorry! I didn't want to make a big deal out of it!" You tell her and take her hand. "Can we talk? In private?" You wanted to know and she nodded her head, standing up as you lead her to the restroom.

Leaving Cari, Alex, Stina and Laura behind. You lock the door behind the two of you. "Please Sara don't break up with me! I know i messed up by not telling you! I just didn't want to make it awkward. Didn't work that well, did it?" You stammer out. Sara let out a small chuckle. Taking your hands in hers. "Love, i sure not happy about you not telling me and i hope you will be honest with me from now on but it's not like you cheated on me and i am not gonna lie i find it kind of hot that i am with you while she clearly still has a thing for you! Yet i am the one you kiss and sleep with!" She answered. There was this mischievous grin on her lips and you knew what that meant. So you grinned as well now. "Honesty from now on!" You whisper out as she pushed you against the Wall of the restroom, biting your earlobe gently ,which resulted in you covering your mouth with your hand moaning into it. Things got alot more heated and let's just say you left the bathroom with shaking knees and Hickeys in different places of your body. Life was great at the moment.

When you two got back to your table Stina & Laura were alone. Cari, Alex and the Crew were gone. By the way the two of you looked when you returned both could tell what you did in the bathroom. "Had fun, talking?" Laura asked teasingly. You blushed and sara chuckled softly. "We did! Thanks for asking, Laura!" She replied and slapped your butt playfully. Which made you giggle shyly. Was a bit embarrassing but oh well. "That is wild! Even for you Guys!" Stina answered and laughed. "If you are curious they left a while ago and said the look forward to seeing us later at the concert!" Laura informed you.

After you ate and talked some more you went to the Concert & went Backstage to talk to Cari. She actually ended up being quite happy for you two and said she would sing at yours and saras wedding. For free of course. All of you ended up at a bar somehow and you just all enyjoyed eachothers company. You and sara always stayed close to one another . One of the most fun but also weirdest days in your lifes.

[loki-licious-945ad]

The Auction

Summary: Prince Loki hosts auctions for desperate, rich, old, men and women who need some help with their desires. Loki never bids. No one ever piqued his interest. Until he sees you. So cute. So innocent. So his.

Pairing: Dark!Loki x female!reader

Word count: 2363

Warnings: 18+, Innocent kink, virginity selling, cheatingish, knife kink, oral(f receiving), praise, degrading, light slapping (thighs, arms), cumming inside, squirting, foul language obviously, iron mentioned (not detailed), nipple sucking, masturbation, grinding, blindfold mentioned. Please let me know if I missed anything!

Also this is my first fic so please be nice. I worked really hard on this! If you don't like dark fics then find another fic to read. I put warnings for a reason. Read at your own risks.

Songs I listened to/used as inspo as i wrote.

Post that got my brain going.

Loki never bid. Even in the auctions he hosted. No one ever piqued the prince's interest. He only hosted these for the older upper class. The old, desperate men and women who needed something to deal with their desires. The auctions were also for a good cause to a point. The poor would sell their virginity for money. They use the money so they can lead a bit of a better life, but for the expense of their virginity.

Loki sits on Odin’s throne, watching over the auction. The throne room is dim; except for the stage that is lit with torches. The virgins come in many different shapes and sizes. Some have more revealing outfits than others. The more revealing the better. Right?

Wrong. The majority of the bidders like to have more clothing on their virgins. It’s like a present waiting to be opened. A sweet present.

One after the next virgins are sold in Loki’s auction. Some are far more interesting than the others. All bids start at 2,000 Asgardian coins. Loki starts to get bored of his own auction. The auction is so deplorable he starts to drift off to sleep on the throne.

As he begins to finally fall into slumber a big roar from the bidders startles him awake. Bidders start to caterwaul bids. A woman stands, “2,500 coins!”

A man interrupts, “5,000 coins!”

Loki watches as one after the next bid for a woman. A beautiful, perfect, innocent woman. Such a perfect virgin. His virgin. No one has piqued his interest. So why this one?

The bid gets higher and higher. Until Loki can’t bear it anymore, “Half a million coins!”

Everyone looks back at Loki with a gasp. They know Loki never bids. Even the ones up for auction know that. Everyone is surprised to see Loki stalk his long legs up to the stage. The bidders watch silently as Loki stomps up onto the stage, throws you over his strong shoulder, and announces, “The auction is over with. Leave at once.”

You squeal as he throws you over his shoulder. He strides out of the throne room and towards his chambers with you over his shoulder. Why does he want to fuck you so badly? Never faltering as he walks through the halls of the palace. Servants and guards bow their heads towards Loki. Even under the odd circumstances, they know not to question Loki and the woman he is carrying. You swear everyone can hear your heartbeat. The prince. The prince of Asgard. He bid half a million on you. You.

As if Loki could hear your thoughts he interrupts them, “You are going to regret selling your virginity. You are mine, darling. You will be my toy,” he chuckles lowly, “and sweet thing I can hear your thoughts. No secrets from your God.”

Loki throws you on his plush bed. Only a bed a prince would have. You hadn’t even noticed that he walked into his chambers. You lie in a four-poster bed made out of wood with gold woven into the wood. Interesting. Exotic furs lay over the bed as well as the richest silks. Bookshelves line the walls. Weapons of all sorts, mostly daggers. Unique art and tall windows adorn the walls.

“You think too much darling. Too observant. Shall I put a blindfold on those lovely eyes? hm~?” You whimper out a ‘no’ as you face your head back to Loki. You whimper once more as you see how he towers over you as you lay, on his bed, on your back.

“Agreed. It would be a shame to hide those pretty eyes of yours, because you’re too nosy,” Loki smiles darkly down at your smaller frame, still laying on his bed. “Sweet little virgin~ Why is it that you decided to sell this pretty little virgin cunt?”

You stammer over your words, but eventually get them out, “I needed money for my boyfriend. He needs it.”

“Mmm… Darling if your boyfriend really needed it he could have sold his virginity,” Loki places his knees on the bed between your legs. Loki traps you between his arms as he looks down at you. “Something tells me that he has already lost it, so he has to use you for money. What a sad man. Good thing you’re mine now.”

Loki watches as you try to wiggle out from under him, but he just presses his body into yours. “Come on darling, don’t run from me. You knew what you were getting yourself into when you sold your virginity,” he presses you deeper into the bed sheets, his lips just above yours. His cock pressed against your cunt. You let out a soft whimper from his weight.

“Tell me darling. Have you ever seen a cock? Touched one? Dreamed of one day being fucked?” Loki moves to kiss your jaw. He loves the noises you make. So innocent. So pure. So his. He nips at your jaw to force an answer out of you.

You let out a whimper as he nips your jaw. “Yes! I’ve seen one… never touched… I’ve dreamed of it many times…” Loki chuckles as you admit you’ve dreamed about being fucked. Even saw one.

“Such a naughty girl. Don’t worry darling, you'll forget about your boyfriend and those dreams. Especially since you’ll be on my cock,” Loki sucks a dark mark into your neck. He can feel your pulse quicken as he does so. Loki grinds his cock down on your panty covered cunt. You whimper once more.

“You will call me ‘My God’. Do you understand darling?” He stands once he is satisfied that you understand him. He stares down at you. Your dress has ridden up around your hips exposing your wet panties, “Looks like someone has enjoyed themselves.” He continues to stare down at you. Your hair frames your face perfectly as you lay against his sheets. Dress creased from Loki’s grinding. Legs spread. Loki glares at you as you try to close your legs from his prying eyes. He slaps your thigh.

“Don’t you dare. Do you understand me!?” Loki pulls your legs apart, he drops to his knees, and pulls you to the edge of his plush bed.

“Yes- yes, My God,” You gasp and stutter as he pulls you closer to the edge. “Good darling. Such a good girl for her God.”

Loki knows it's over the top, but he loves the power he has over you. Loki summons a dagger to cut your panties off, throwing them to the side. Loki growls as you shut your legs once more. Loki drags his dagger across your right thigh. “Naughty girl. You were being good… Darling if you don’t open these beautiful legs I’ll fuck you with the dagger,” though Loki would only use the handle of the blade, but what you don’t know won’t hurt you. He chuckles as you open your legs quickly. Exposing your cunt. Pink, dripping, and so needy. Loki hoists your thighs over his shoulders. He drags his dagger over your thighs. The dagger drags over the mound of hair you have, then over your puffy clit softly. Loki chuckles as he hears a whimper that’s mixed with pain and pleasure. Loki sets the dagger aside. Without warning he wraps his hands around your thighs, then stuffs his face in your dripping cunt. Sucking on your puffy clit.

“Oh my God!” Loki moans with you. Your taste is one he’ll never forget. He’s keeping you. He’ll fuck every thought of your boyfriend out of your brain. Even as he eats your delicious cunt. Sucking and tongue fucking he still manages to let a few words out, “Yes darling I am your God.”

You arch your cunt closer to his face as you grip onto the silk sheets and furs on his bed. Loki chuckles as you arch your greedy cunt closer to his face. He doesn't blame you. He is a God with a great mouth. A silver-tongued God. He loves how greedy your virgin cunt is. He nips and rolls your clit between his teeth. He moans as he feels your hands shoot to his head and into his dark locks. This only spurs him on. Gods he’s so hard. He laps at your clit, sucking and licking. He then tongue fucks your cunt. He loves the way your virgin cunt clenches around his tongue. His nose nudges at your clit with every thrust of his tongue. Your moans start to get louder, your grip on his head tightens, your thighs do so too.

All you can moan is ‘Oh God’ and ‘Oh My God’. Loki moves back up to your clit. Sucking your clit between his lips. He knows you're close. He knows you're about to cum. 

An unfamiliar feeling rises higher and higher in your stomach. It finally snaps. Your back arches even more. Plump thighs squeezing his head. Hands pulling his dark tresses. Your moans mix with the sound of Loki’s cunt devouring. All you can see are stars. This is bliss. Loki continues to devour your cunt as you cum. Loki laps at your sweet cunt until you can’t take it anymore. Before Loki stands he kisses your swollen clit making you whimper. 

With a flick of his hand, both of your clothes are gone. His cock standing proudly, just like him. Loki glares at you as you try to cover yourself with the silk blankets. He swats at your arms. Loki gives a mischievous smile as you move up the bed towards the pillows. He starts to jerk his cock. The tip of his cock dripping with precum. He loves the way you watch with fear and arousal. You’ve pressed your back against his headboard. Trying to escape him and his cock, “Oh darling you can’t run. You are mine. I own you now.”

Loki loves the way you look at him in fear as he jerks his cock. He can hear your thoughts. You’re worried about that stupid boyfriend. Loki releases his cock, climbing in the middle of the bed, his cock bobbing as he moves. He grabs your ankles. He loves the way you gasp when he yanks you down the bed. Your back hitting the bed makes you squeak. Your tits bounce as you hit the bed. Loki is kneeling between your thighs. Those pretty thighs of yours are wide open and no way to close them because of Loki. Your cunt so pink and wet. Precum drips from Loki’s cock onto your cunt. All you can do is whimper at the feeling. Loki rubs the head of his cock over your clit, smearing his precum with your arousal. Small moans come from your mouth. Little begs. For what? You don’t even know. Loki pulls your ass on his thighs. Your back arched so beautifully. Those legs of yours over his strong shoulders. His long cock lays over your cunt, “Oh darling~ You’ll be ruined for any other man. This pretty, virgin cunt will only want my cock. No one will satisfy you like me.”

The head of his cock is positioned at your cunt. As he pushes the head of his cock in, you let out the most delicious moans. Cunt clenching his tip so well. “Darling you’re so tight. I hope you’ll be able to take my whole cock,” he grins as you let out a whimper. “Don’t worry darling I’ll make it fit. One way or another.”

A loud, mischievous, laugh sounds through his chambers as he bottoms out, loving the loud moan you let out. Mixed with pain and pleasure. “By the norns- You were definitely worth that half a million- So damn tight,” Loki thrust a few times loving your moans, “Looks like your God popped your cherry. What a sweet treat. What a sweet present.” The smell of sex and iron waft through the air of Loki’s chambers. The thrusts become faster, harder, and deeper. Loki watches as your eyes roll back, hands gripping the bed sheets, tits bouncing as he fucks you hard. Fuck. Within a second Loki has your knees bent into your chest. His strong hands pressing down on your plump thighs. Squelching sounds from your cunt through the chambers. Moans so loud that the whole palace can hear, no doubt. The bed creaks and hits the wall of his chambers. Loki continues to hammer into you, he groans as he hits your g-spot. Your back is arching against your legs and his body. Your cunt clenches repeatedly on his cock, “My God~,” your mouth gaped open with sweet moans. Eyes rolled back. You could probably see your own brain if Loki hadn’t fucked it out already.

“By the norns you look like a Goddess. My Goddess,” Loki throws his head back with a groan as he feels you clench even harder at his praise. He bends down to latch onto one of your nipples. Sucking and nipping at it. Hitting your g-spot even harder with the new position. Fuck. His pubic hairs rub up against your clit. Skin slapping loudly. He knows you’re going to cum. He’s about to cum. His balls tighten. He wants to make you cum first.

“Oh my God!” Loki moves from your nipple, watching as you moan and jerk from the immense pleasure. Like a damn painting. He’s definitely painting this later. Cunt clamping down on his cock. FUCK. Did you just squirt? Loki couldn’t hold back anymore. He cums. Balls deep, with a loud moan. The feeling of Loki cumming deep in your cunt makes you moan. You both are seeing stars. Are we both in Valhalla? Loki finally stills. Cock still twitching in your cunt that is still clenching.

Loki gives his signature mischievous smile as he looks down at you, “Oh darling. You squirted on me. What a mess. You really enjoyed the fucking? Hm?”

You try to apologize, Loki shushes you, “Oh sweet girl I wasn’t complaining. It means you’re hydrated. Such a good girl.” Loki pulls out of you. He gazes at your dripping cunt.

“Since I’ll be keeping you. What’s your name?”

[crystalmagpie447]

mmm, good good, excellent

*pulling up a chair and looking at you with my big ol eyes*

Tell me more about your boys! What's their personalities? How do they treat each other? How do they each interact with yn? Anything you have I will eat up, and no worries if there's certain things you're still waiting to reveal :)

THERE IT IS!!

Plotline (or soemthing): management decides to give the daycare attendant wings, after an accident that caused their zipline to break midair ☠️. (This isnt thatbig of an unusual change because every human type person has wings ((avians??idk i just like wings)

Somehow during maintenance, sun and moon get tha virus™ 

This makes them more irrated/closed off/nervous than usual, but they dont understand why (virus gets worse as the story progresses, y/n takes it upon themselves to figure out how to help)

Personalities!!

- Sun (pre-upgrade): joyous and silly!! For the kids at least 

Never really liked talking w/ human staff because they never talk to him

(Post upgrade and when reader starts working at the plex): joyous and silly still!!! But as time goes on you wonder how much of it is an act. His smile only really seems full when hes entertaining the children, and you figure its because thats what he was built for. 

Usually steers you away from topics and conversations he does not want to talk about, but if you pry too much hell probably snap and saysomething mean (OURGH i think itd be easier to draw or write interactions in order to explainthis better sorry☠️☠️)

Nicknames for reader: buttercup, busybee, sunshine

Moon (pre- upgrade)

Jestery and silly!! Ofc ofc but also a kind/ comforting presence, loved naptime, and the kids loved him!!! 

Never interacted with human staff tho, but if he ever caught  a worker (or any adult rlly)  staring at him, or saying mean things abt either attendants, hed probably stare creepily at them untill they got freaked out and ran away lol OR find someother way to spook them if that wasnt scary enough)

(post upgrade)

Alot less patient, alot more mean/intimidating (and off-putting)

Parents (and staff) complained abt him acting weird and most stopped taking their kids to the daycare 

Soo sun takes over naptime, and moon becomes security at night (yesyes the usual ☝️)

When y/n meets him hes mean and tricky, because he expects them to be just like all the other staff

But when he realises youre not, (and at times when hes more in control) his slightly ill-intended pranks lighten up to teasing and playfulness (huzzah!!)

Has a music box in his chest 

Nicknames for reader: dragonfly, nightengale, starlight

(THEY CAN BOTH FLY!! How?? Idk ☠️)

Reader: s ome guy (lol) (in their early 20’s orsomething ((ill probably never really mention this if i ever do choose to write stuff, so ‘tis up for interpretation!!) looking for a job 

Juggling college and hoping to earn some money on the side 

Has some kind of defect where their wings stopped growing at one point, and are too small to allow them to fly 

Personality: ourrgh i dont think ive thought too much abt their personality actually LOL

S t ubborn (will get irritated but cares too much to give up!!)

Jumps to conclusions but will wait until evidence is provided in order to believe said conclusions (doesnt want to be wrong or annoying) 

Nickname for sun: sunny

Nickname for moon: moon-man

@midnight-mourning

HAVE AT THEE!!!