#(the smut is also 6k now but that’s between you and me)

[sometimesanalice]

This is how Wildest Dreams Pt 2 is going in case anyone wanted an update…

(For context, that man has been getting a [redacted] for like 84 years now so that was truly a very valid question from @gretagerwigsmuse lol)

It should be dropping later this week! (just like Bradley’s pants)

[strang3lov3]

Seeing Red

“Because if I don’t fuck you,” he says, “Then I’m gonna strangle you. So which would you like?”

Joel’s sorry that your period sucks, but he's reached the end of his rope with your attitude. (6k)

Tags - 18+ smut, brat taming, blow jobs, face fucking, rough period sex, fingering, mating press, overstimulation and multiple orgasms, creampie, aftercare in the form of a shared bubble bath, all things periods and period symptoms so headaches, breast pain, cramps, irritability that reader takes out on Joel. You will feel so bad for being such a cunt to this man but he gets to fill two of your holes with his cum so it all kind of evens out. takes place in jackson Fic help - @beefrobeefcal and @joelsdagger for all of their love and support and eyeballs, @noxturnalpascal and @endlessthxxghts thank you both for being my compass and giving me direction and helping to make this fic perfect. I love you <3 A/N - if you're on your period, i'm sending you a hug <3 if you're not i'm hugging you too

I was reminded of my friend @covetyou's fic "Sleepless" which is a lovely piece of classic literature, just like the rest of her works, and I'd like to credit her for inspo. Thank you Lo 🤎🩷💚

You should have guessed there’d be a bloodstain in your underwear, but despite the headaches, your sore breasts, and your cramping abdomen, you’re surprised when you’re met with rusty red in your panties. Fucking great, you whisper, dripping with sarcasm, this is not what you needed today. You had so many things you wanted to get done and now you were going to be spending the whole day miserable and in pain.

“Joel,” you loudly call out. You wait a beat, nothing. “JOEL,” you yell louder. 

You hear the faint sound of his recliner, the popping of his knees and the creaking of the stairs as he walks up them. His two feet are visible through the space between the floor and the bathroom door and then he knocks, “Whatcha need, darlin’?”

“New underwear,” you answer. “And a pad. Also in the underwear drawer.” 

Joel walks away and returns with what you’ve asked for and slides both items under the door. You change your panties and secure the pad made of old rags and t-shirts with the clothespin attached to it. “You got it?” he asks.

“Yeah,” you reply.

“Guessin’ you just started your cycle, then.” 

“Mhm.” 

“Can I get you anything?”

“Nope,” you answer. “I think I’m just gonna go to bed.” 

“Alright. I’ll join you, then.” 

 You wash your hands and rinse the bloodstain out of your panties with annoyance in the sink, wringing them out before tossing them in the dirty laundry hamper in the bathroom. When you unlock the door and leave the bathroom, Joel’s already asleep in your shared bed. He sleeps curled on his side and yet he still fucking snores - between that and the pain you’re in, you know it won’t be a restful night of sleep. You look at Joel, sleeping peacefully like a baby, and yet you wanna beat the living fucking crap out of him. You curl your body around his, stealing his body heat to soothe your cramps. 

Joel wakes up early the next morning and greets you with a kiss pressed to the side of your head. “Fuck off,” you mumble, your voice is still thick with sleep but he knows you mean it so he lets you sleep in a bit while he cleans the bathroom for you. He works as quietly as he can, scrubbing it and mopping it from top to bottom. He empties the trash can and the laundry hamper, he makes sure there’s a fresh bar of soap and a new washrag for you. Joel’s just finishing up and wiping dust from the mirror when you find him in the bathroom. “Mornin’, sunshine,” he says as he kisses the top of your head. “How do you feel?” 

“Shitty.” You grab at the mirror and Joel’s skin crawls as you touch the glass with your thumb, the smudges left behind from your fingertips clear as day on the freshly cleaned glass. He’ll just touch it up later. You pull out your toothbrush and frown, your nose scrunched in disgust. “It smells like bleach in here,” you complain.

“Well, yeah,” Joel chuckles. “I just cleaned it for ya. ‘Course it smells like bleach.”

“I didn’t ask you to do that,” you mumble. “The bleach you used makes my head hurt worse.”

“Oh,” Joel scratches the back of his head and frowns. “M’sorry, then. Well, we can let it air out for a while, we’ll leave the fan on. Shouldn’t smell for more than a day or so.”

“Yeah, I guess.”

If looks could fuckin’ kill, Joel thinks. You’re glaring at him. He takes that as his cue to leave. You shrink away from him as he gently brushes your arm when he walks past, then shut the door loudly behind him. Ouch. Joel knows not to take it personally, though. You’re crampy, but you’re also probably hungry. He’ll make you breakfast, something with protein because he knows you need it. 

He cleans the kitchen first. He washes the dirty dishes you must’ve forgotten about last night and wipes crumbs from the table. As you come downstairs dressed in sweats and a shirt you stole from Joel, he’s finishing up making your breakfast. “Sit down, I made your favorite.” 

You sit down at the table with your head in your hands. Joel puts a plate with two slices of perfectly golden brown toast and two over-easy eggs in front of you, then a fork and a knife on either side. He fills a glass with water for you as well. He walks away to clean up the stove, then turns around to check on you. Your face is contorted in disgust and you’re not eating. “What’s the matter?”

“I don’t want this,” you grouse.

“But s’your favorite. You love your eggs over easy,” Joel says. “And the toast, that’s fresh bread and butter. Eat up.” 

“Yeah, but I wanted scrambled.” 

Joel stares at you for a moment, dumbfounded. You usually hate scrambled eggs, and he knows this. But you’re not smirking or holding back laughter like you’re fucking with him. So maybe your tastes have changed, who knows. “Okay. Would you like me to make you scrambled eggs instead, then?”

“Yes,” you mumble in a small voice. 

“I didn’t hear ya, sweetheart. Speak up, please.” 

“I said yes,” you snap. 

Your clipped tone cuts like a knife. Joel bites his inner cheek as he takes your plate from you. He quickly scarfs down the perfectly cooked eggs and toast as he makes you a new plate of breakfast, this time with scrambled eggs. He places it in front of you with a little less care than before and waits for you to take a bite. “Better?”

“Just okay.” 

‘Just okay’. Of course you think it’s ‘just okay’, they’re scrambled fucking eggs - which you don’t like. You’re just being - 

Joel needs to cool off. Hopefully once you’ve eaten you’re a little less irritable. “I’m gonna head out an’ do some errands. Be back shortly,” He’s met with no answer from you, which he expected. 

-

He comes back an hour or so later with a few things from the market he’s been needing along with a couple of VHS tapes that he rented from the library. “So,” Joel says, “I picked out some movies for ya.” He lays four tapes down on the coffee table in front of the couch where you lay. “When Harry Met Sally, that’s a good one,” he begins, “Next is How To Lose a Guy In 10 Days, then Blade Runner, and I picked out My Cousin Vinny,” Joel says. He thinks you’re gonna pick out Blade Runner because it stars Harrison Ford, who he knows you have a thing for. “My Cousin Vinny is pretty good, I don’t think we’ve seen that one yet f’ya wanna give that a try.”

“Mmm, no.” 

Shot down. “Okay. How ‘bout Blade Runner, then. S’got Indiana Jones in -”

“No. I don’t care,” you interrupt, which hurts Joel’s feelings a little. A lot, actually. “I wanna watch this one,” you point to How To Lose a Guy In 10 Days. “He’s cute.” 

Of course you picked the Matthew McConaughey movie. God, Joel fucking hated him. He always seemed so skeezy, if there’s anyone who should’ve bit it on Outbreak Day, it should’ve been Matthew McConaughey. “Yeah, okay. Whatever. Do you think he’s dreamy too?”

“Fuck off, Joel.” 

So teasing’s off the table too, he’ll add that to the list of things that have pissed you off today. Joel turns on the TV and puts the tape in the VHS player before he sits back down next to you. At first you rest on his shoulder, then you spread out and lay your head on his lap. It’s not long before you fall asleep on Joel, leaving him to watch this dumb fucking movie all by himself because god forbid he move you and disrupt your nap. He knows better than to do that. 

-

“So fuckin’ stupid,” Joel whispers to himself as the movie plays, though he did find himself enjoying the part where the Kate Hudson sings “You’re So Vain” by Carly Simon. He always did like that song. 

“Mmmm,” you groan, shifting onto your back. Joel’s hand is stroking your hair as you look up at him, but you push it away. “You’re too close to me,” you grumble. 

“What’re you talkin’ about?” 

“You’re crowding me. I feel smothered.” 

Joel scoffs. “Oh, you feel smothered? You’re the one who laid on me.” Once again, your glare is all that you need to say. “Alright then, I’ll move.” Joel concedes. He lifts your head gently and scoots down to the opposite end of the couch. And then he hears you huff. “What?”

“Well, now I don’t have a pillow.” 

Joel sighs as he gets up to grab a throw pillow from the opposite couch. 

“The other one.” 

You’re referring to the other throw pillow that’s absolutely indistinguishable from the one currently in Joel’s hand, but he gets it for you anyway. “Lift your head,” he says softly, putting the pillow under you. He sits back down in the spot you made him move to as you both watch the movie play, but your soft groans interrupt. You’re no doubt in pain from all the cramps right now. “I’ve got somethin’ like a heating pad,” Joel says, looking at you. “S’a big sock filled with rice, I heat it up and use it for neck and back pain. Would that help with them cramps?” You nod without making any effort to meet Joel’s eyes, which he finds a little rude. But still, you’re hurting. He’ll give you grace. 

So, once again, Joel gets up for you. He goes upstairs to get his rice sock from his nightstand, then comes back downstairs and heats it in the microwave for a couple of minutes. He pokes the sock to make sure it’s plenty warm for you and then gives it to you to take. “Here,” he says, “Hold it on your tummy.”

“JESUS,” you yell at him. 

“What?”

“It’s too fucking hot, Joel, why would you make it so hot?” 

 “Just give it a second, sweetheart, you’ll get used to it.” 

“No. It was burning me.” 

“Okay, then let me have it and we’ll let it cool off a minute. Christ almighty.” Joel takes the sock back from you, and he knows his hands are pretty calloused but…it doesn’t feel that hot. When a few minutes have passed, he gives it back to you. “This should be better.” 

You lay the big, warm stuffed sock across your stomach and frown. “It’s not warm enough.” 

“You have gotta be kiddin’ me.” 

“Mm-mm,” you shake your head, giving Joel back his sock like you just assume he’ll heat it up again for you. 

“Just a couple minutes ago you screamed bloody murder about it burnin’ you. And now it’s not hot enough?”

“Yeah, that’s what I said.” When Joel doesn’t jump immediately to reheat the sock for you, you look at him impatiently. “Joel.” 

“You can ask, you know.” 

But Joel gets the hint and gets up for you a third time to reheat the sock he’s letting you borrow. You don’t say please, and when he returns with the sock reheated, there’s no thank you either. What does he get from you? “It’s too hot.”

“Then tell me how I should rectify that for you, because last time I let it cool off and it wasn’t warm enough for ya after.” 

“I don’t know,” you snap. “You’re just really upsetting me right now. Everything hurts and your voice is grating.”

“I’m upsetting you?” Joel repeats your words back to you. “And my voice is grating.” 

“Yes.” 

He’s about at his wits end. “You know, you–” Joel decides not to finish that sentence. Instead, he sighs as he pinches the bridge of his nose and breathes out on the count of five. “Two, three, four…You need to drink some water. S’your first issue, you’re probably dehydrated. Did you drink any water?” 

“It’s not your business.”

 Jesus fucking Christ. “Okay, well I’m makin’ it my business.” Joel gets up for the fourth goddamn time and slams the cup cabinet before filling a glass with water from the sink. He marches back to the couch, “Sit up,” he says. “Drink.” 

“I don’t want to,” you whine. 

“It’ll fix your headache. Drink.” 

“It won’t actually, that’s a myth.” 

“Right, what do I know when you’ve got an answer for fuckin’ everything. Drink.” 

You sit up, scowling at Joel as you take a sip. 

“All of it.” 

You drink the rest of it, glaring at him the whole time. He’s so full of shit, as if any of what you’re going through could be fixed by drinking a glass of water. Water won’t fix your cramps, won’t fix your aching and sore back. When you’re done, you slam the glass on the end table next to you and in doing so, break Joel’s reading glasses. Oops. Didn’t see those. The lenses aren’t shattered, but one of the arms is all bent now. When you look at Joel, he’s biting his bottom lip and breathing deeply. “Your glasses broke.” 

“Yeah. I see that.” 

“I didn’t mean to,” you tell him defensively.

“Right.” 

“But you really shouldn’t leave your glasses there, Joel.”

“Yeah, right. Shouldn’t leave my glasses on the end table,” Joel says. “I should leave them where, exactly? Maybe the floor?” 

“Somewhere else.” 

“Right. Somewhere else.” 

He’s hoping that by repeating your words back to you, you start to hear how absolutely ridiculous you sound. But you don’t seem to. Joel turns and walks away before he fucking throttles you. 

“Can you put on the next movie? I wanna watch My Cousin Vinny.”

Now, now you want to watch that movie. And Joel’s gonna miss out, because he can’t stand to be around you for one minute longer. “Are your legs broken?” 

“Yes.” 

Walked into that one. “You’re fuckin’ impossible. Fine. I’ll put it on, then I’m goin’ away for a bit.” 

“Good.”

Oh, he could fucking kill you. This whole day he’s heard nothing but complaints from your mouth, no pleases or thank you’s at all. Everything he’s done today has been for you, and you couldn’t give a flying fuck. 

Joel puts on the movie, grabs his bent glasses from the end table and heads out to the garage without saying a single word to you. You wonder what bug crawled up his ass. 

-

My Cousin Vinny plays just fine until Vinny shows up in his ridiculous suit to the courthouse. The tape begins to skip a whole bunch, the movie barely making sense, and you have no idea how to fix it - not that it’s your job to know, anyway. So you call out the name of the man whose job it is. 

“Joel.” 

No answer. 

“JOELLLL,” you yell. 

Same deal. You sigh as you sit up and get off of the couch, walking to the garage door. There’s finally a break in your cramps and you’re feeling halfway-human for the first time since yesterday. Entering the garage, you find Joel sitting at his workbench, he’s working on bending the frame of his glasses back into shape. “Joel.” 

He doesn’t turn around to look at you and in fact, he heard you calling for him. He had just ignored you. “Looks like your legs are workin’ now,” Joel replies, without looking at you. “S’a miracle. Means you can follow me around now, terrific.”

You choose to ignore his sarcasm. “Whatever. You need to do something for me. The VCR is messing up and you have to fix it.”

“Hm,” he hums.

“What’s hm?” 

“I’ve fixed lotsa things for you today,” he says quietly. “I need some time to fix my glasses that you broke. S’a difficult task on account of the fact I need my glasses to see.”

“You can do me one favor, Joel. It won’t kill you.” 

Joel stops and gently places his broken glasses on his work bench. He turns to his right and glares daggers at you. “One favor,” he scoffs. “Oh, you’re a fuckin’ peach. You wanna try that again?”

“Try what again?” 

You’re fucking with him. You have to be fucking with him. Why are you fucking with him? You’re not antagonistic like this, not usually, so he concludes that you must be looking for a fight. At this point, Joel is too. 

“I’ve done you countless favors today, sweetheart,” Joel gripes.

“Yeah, but-” you begin.

Joel’s large, warm hand suddenly covers the lower half of your face, silencing your argument. “If the next words outta this mouth aren’t thank you, then I don’t wanna hear ‘em. In fact…”

He bites his inner cheek, nodding his head as he thinks. The way he stares at you, his dark eyes piercing through you - you feel the chill deep in your bones. A wave of clarity hits you as you recall some of the details of the day, the way Joel was there at every turn and while you were busy being cranky and achey, he was trying to wait on you hand and foot. Shit. You’ve been a Grade-A bitch to him all day, a total fucking cunt.

Breaking the silence, Joel finally clears his throat and continues his thought, “I’m gonna give you two options,” Joel says. “You can walk the fuck away from me, or you can get on your knees. Whichever you choose, you do so silently. Nod if you understand.” 

It’s like you’re watching a scene from a movie. You hear Joel’s words, but you almost don’t believe they’re real and so they don’t quite register. He pulls his hand away from your face slowly. Your mouth falls open a bit but you don’t say or do anything.

“Nod. If. You. Understand.” You nod quickly. Joel awaits your decision as you look at the garage door and contemplate your clean way out from this situation, “So what’ll it be?” he asks. Despite it all, that uneasy feeling in your gut, you drop to your knees anyway, eyes still lingering on the door before you look up at Joel. You trust him to take care of you and you think you might owe him this obedience after your behavior today. “You’ve earned yourself brownie points choosin’ the latter of the two options, but this still ain’t gonna be fun for you,” he says. It should scare you - and it does - but you’re still thrilled by it, by the way he sighs and his knees crack as he gets off of his barstool, by the cold look in his eyes as he reaches under his thick belly to unbuckle his belt. Standing above you, he pulls out his half-hard cock and pumps it, feeling it grow to full length in his hand. He’s thick, veiny, and generously sized, a pearly white bead of precum sits atop his slit. His cock is just an inch or two away from your mouth as he holds it between his fingers, his thumb on top and middle and forefingers on the underside. With his other hand, he cards his fingers through your hair and pulls you close, the tip of his cock pressing against your lips. “Open.”

You part your lips open and with that, Joel pushes himself into your mouth inch by inch. You smell him first, that musky and heady sort of scent. Next, you taste the saltiness of his skin and his precome on your tongue and for a moment it’s pleasurable, with his cock halfway in your mouth. You wrap your hand around the end of his shaft like you know what he wants but you don’t know, not really - Joel holds your hand in his own and squeezes it so that your knuckles grind against each other a little bit. He pushes himself further and you can’t lick him or savor this like you wanted to, you just feel his cock intruding, sliding into your mouth. Joel’s testing you, making sure that you can handle all of him and if you can’t, you know he’ll make you. 

He draws out of your mouth entirely only to force his way back in, making you gag and sputter. You attempt to pull away but Joel keeps his hand firm on your head and holds you right where he wants you. “Nuh-uh. I don’t know where you think you’re goin’, hon.” 

There’s no gentleness to it, he fucks your mouth heatedly so that you’re drooling and choking on him, your eyes springing with tears as that pressure builds behind them. “Breathe through your nose,” he reminds you. “In and out. You ain’t done jus’ ‘cause you’re cryin’.” Your lips are sore with the repeated action, your jaw is aching. He rolls his hips, his cock is deep down your throat as he relishes in your warm, wet mouth and the way it makes him feel. 

“Mmm,” you moan, you’re not sure if the noise is indicative of your pleasure or discomfort.

“Quiet,” he growls. “Heard fuckin’ enough outta you today. You keep quiet.”

Your nose is buried in that thatch of coarse curls as he rocks his hips over and over, his soft and pillowy tummy bouncing against your forehead. You squirm and whine as his tip teases the back of your throat and your mouth feels so full, uncomfortably so. Joel picks up on that. “Let it be a lesson to ya, then, if it hurts. That mouth ‘a yours has done nothin’ but bitch and moan at me today. S’a punishment, ain’t ‘sposed to feel good.” 

He’s grunting and groaning, eyes screwed shut as he uses you, pumping in and out of your mouth. Your jaw aches with the brutality of the way he fucks your mouth, and just as you think you can’t take anymore, you feel Joel’s cock begin to twitch and pulse. He comes in your mouth without a warning, painting your tongue with his hot spend. It’s salty and bitter and warm on your tongue. Once you’ve swallowed, Joel reaches down and yanks you up by your bicep. He thought fucking your mouth and coming down your throat would make him feel better but honestly, it doesn’t. As he looks at your face, all puffy with tears and swollen lips, he can’t quite find it in himself to let go of his anger. Not yet, at least. “Let’s go,” he grunts as he drags you with him towards the garage door. He marches you though the house and up the stairs. 

“Where are we going?”

“Bedroom,” Joel growls, answering your question like it’s obvious. You suppose it should be, but you figured he was done with you. But he’s not. The regret begins to set in when you realize the retribution you’re about to be met with for the way you’ve treated Joel today. You’d be lying if you said that while wallowing in your pain you didn’t notice how your curt tone got under his skin, hurt his feelings and frustrated him immensely. The dread you feel can’t save you, it’s all too late now. 

 “Because if I don’t fuck you,” he says, “Then I’m gonna strangle you. So which would you like?”

“Fuck me,” you whisper. 

“Exactly.” 

Joel pushes you into the bedroom and locks the door behind himself. “Lie down on your back,” he says. 

You protest, “But the sheets, Joel. The blood–”

“I will wash the fucking sheets. We can add it to the list of all the things I’ve done for ya today, hm?”

When you don’t jump at his request, Joel takes initiative. He pulls off your - his - shirt from your body and then bends you over the end of the neatly made bed, the old and worn comforter feels rough on the skin of your cheek. Joel pulls down your sweatpants and panties in one motion and then flips you over onto your back, your legs hanging off the end of the bed. You feel embarrassed when you catch a glimpse of your bloodied pad and underwear, moreso when you feel yourself making a mess on his bedding and between your legs. 

“You didn’t make yourself come today, did you?”

“Uhh–” you stutter. “I - I…”

“No point in gettin’ bashful now, darlin’. Just gimme an answer.”

“No,” you tell him. It’s been a while. 

“Figures.”

Joel had assumed sexual frustration had been playing a role in your attitude today. Cramps, headaches, all sorts of things going on with you and a needy, aching pussy to boot. He does feel sorry for you, but he feels sorry for himself too. It’s why he got his first, but now it’s time for you to get yours. An orgasm should set you straight, or two or three. Whatever he feels is necessary. 

Joel undresses himself before pushing your thighs apart and hitching your legs around his waist. Slowly, he slides his thumb through your folds and then circles your clit. He knows you’re vulnerable like this - bleeding pussy on display for him as you make a mess of his sheets. But he’s patient, and he massages your clit calmly until you finally let a moan, a little mmm slip. He smirks at that. 

He pushes his middle two fingers inside you, pumping in and out slowly. He then curls his fingers, searching for that sweet spot on a woman he loves so much. “Fuck,” you cry out, legs instinctually closing shut around him, and he knows he’s found it. 

“Don’t fight it,” he says, opening you back up. He curls his fingers and circles your clit in tandem, making all sorts of lewd noises with your cunt. He admires your body all laid out for him like this, your breasts and your pebbled nipples, soft tummy rising and falling with your breathy oh’s and ahh’s, thick curls framing your pretty pussy like a picture just for him. Joel takes his free hand and uses it to press down on your lower stomach, intensifying the feeling of it all. You come hard, gushing on his fingers as you whimper his name. 

Joel pulls his fingers from your core and wipes them haphazardly on his own torso. “Joel,” you gasp when you feel the thick head of his cock at your entrance.

“I am sorry,” he begins, notching his tip inside you and popping it out. He slides the blunt head through your folds and over your clit, then taps the sensitive part of you with himself. “That you’re in pain. It isn’t fair and I know that. But you’ve done nothing but take your hurt out on me.” He presses himself inside you again, “I’ve got a half a mind to take my own hurt out on you, y’know.” His voice is dark and angered, but he speaks calmly in a way that contrasts the darkness but maintains his authority all the same. “And I think I’m gonna.”

“Joel, I– ”

“Quiet,” he commands. He begins teasing your slit with his cock once more before he speaks, “So this is what we’re gonna do: you’re gonna take what I give you, however much or little it is. You’re not gonna cry or complain ‘cause you’ve done enough of that today. Right?” Joel pauses, “Nod your head.” 

 You obey his rule and nod, yes.

He drags his cock up and down your cunt again, the soft skin of your labia rubbing so nicely against his thickness. He notches himself inside you over and over again, pushing in a little bit deeper each time and pulling back out. You whine, rolling your hips in search of more. “I know, I know, sweetheart,” he coos at you to quiet you down. “You’re all out of sorts today. M’gonna fix it. I always fix it, don’t I?”

Yes. You nod again. Quiet.

“S’right,” he says. “Good girl.”

With that, Joel pushes his leaking cock into you entirely, one gradual slide that has you sucking in a breath that comes out in a strained sort of whimper. His hard, warm shaft parting your insides, filling you whole. Joel hears it in the way that you sigh, that this, this is what you needed. He rocks his hips once, twice. Experiments with shallow thrusts, inching his way in and out of you before he draws out of your pussy entirely only to thrust himself right back in, deeper and harder than before. 

With the fullness of Joel inside of you, everything seems to melt away - all that anger, misplaced or not. Joel’s rhythmic thrusting soothes you, sort of. The soreness of your body, the aching cramps in your abdomen are all gone as you focus on the in and out, the in and out. He builds a comfortable pace, but one that borders on too much too soon. His hands on your waist, pulling you towards him as he pushes into you in equal measure. 

He fucks you without discipline, no tenderness at all to the action with those sloppy thrusts, but you’re more lost in him than he is in you - he’s focused on your face, watching you make an ‘O’ with your mouth, and he’s focused on your bouncing body, your twitching thighs spread wide. Your moans, your whimpers and your whines, babbling nothing but nonsense. Joel’s brow is furrowed as he breathes heavily through his teeth, his soft body jerking above you as he hits that sweet spot inside you over and over and over…

“It’s all ya needed, isn’t it? The whole goddamn time,” he pants. “Didn’t need to go an’ bitch me out all day if you needed lovin’ like this. Woulda been nice f’ya just said so.” Joel reaches for your breasts, harshly squeezing the tender, sore flesh. You wince in pain and he loosens his grip, focusing on your nipples instead. He twists and flicks the sensitive buds and your moans become louder, more high pitched. Joel fucking loves it when that happens, you never realized. 

“Oh, Joel,” you moan, “Yeah, fuck.” 

With one hand still teasing your nipples, he brings the other to your pussy. A few strokes of his thumb on your clit is all it takes to send you over the edge a second time, wanton moans and choked sobs spilling from your lips as he fucks you through it. 

And fucks you, and fucks you. 

And keeps fucking you. 

It doesn’t end, he doesn’t slow himself and you never feel that come down, that descent from pleasure. It keeps going, like pressure with nowhere to go and you feel like you might break. “I can’t, I need you to stop, stop, Joel.”

“Nuh-uh,” he shakes his head, thrusting still. “You can take it, be a good girl. Gonna fuck you good and deep like you need. You brought this on yourself, anyway. Two more.” 

This whole time, he doesn’t stop. It’s so much at once and when you thought it was going to end, it doesn’t. Tears of overstimulation spring in your eyes and flow freely down your cheeks. Joel lets you cry because he knows you need it, he knows the release is good for you. You poor thing, how much you must be feeling right now, both physically and mentally. “It’s too much, Joel, I can’t,” you plead.

 “Always the tears with you, huh?” he taunts. “Always somethin’. Oh, I know. I know.” 

It’s the way you look at Joel that causes him to cave, eyes all wide and tear-stained. You’re spent and he knows it, what with all that your body’s put you through. You’ve had a rough day and though he did too, he can’t help but feel sympathy for you at this moment. “Oh, my sweet girl. What am I gonna do with you, hm?”

“I don’t know,” you sniffle. 

“Know you don’t, ‘n you don’t have to. S’my job,” he soothes. With his clean hand, he traces the side of your face and rubs his thumb over your cheekbone. “How about this, then - what are we gonna do next time you’re not feeling so good?” 

“I’m - I’m–”

“You’re gonna tell me what you need,” he instructs, “And you’re gonna ask for it. Nicely. So that means usin’ your manners. Please, Joel. Thank you, Joel. Remember those words?”

“Yeah,” you nod, “Yeah, I remember.”

 “But you forgot ‘em the whole day today,” Joel says softly. “I think you gotta learn to compromise, too,” he adds. The guilt had begun to set in before, but you really start to feel the burn now. You were unkind to Joel, and he’s been nothing but sweet, doting on every one of your needs. “I think an apology’s in order for the way you treated me today.” 

He’s right, and you know it. “I’m sorry. I’m really sorry, Joel.”

“Oh, I know you are. You just needed the reminder, s’okay,” You hadn’t even noticed how his thrusting had slowed to a still until it picks up again slowly, as he presses kisses to you. Your cheeks first, then your lips. “I’ll compromise too - I’m only gonna make you come one more time, not two. Sound good? Sound fair?”

“I don’t think I can, Joel…”

“Yeah, you can, s’the last one. Take it good for me,” he encourages. “Take it good.” 

That’s what he repeats as his thrusts build again, fucking you deeply. Take it good, take it good for me. He hikes you up further on the bed and joins you so that he’s no longer standing at the floor, he’s got you pressed in half instead, your knees on either side of your chest and your feet above his shoulders. This angle intensifies everything and he knows, oh he knows how much it is for you. You’re tired, sore, overstimulated. But you’ll be done soon, he’ll be done with you soon. He takes your hand and wedges it between your bodies, pressing your own fingers to your clit, “Let go for me, I wanna feel you let go for me,” he says. “Focus right here. You’re gonna come with me, keep your eyes on me…”

You don’t even have to massage your clit, the way Joel angles himself has his body doing all the work, his pubic bone adding pressure to your fingers adding pressure to your clit. It’s intense, all of it - deeply energetic, overwhelming. You can’t quite discern your orgasm as it builds, there’s no definitive start but it’s powerful, devastating almost. Washing over you in waves, you feel it in the base of your spine first. You feel it in your gut, the backs of your thighs all the way to your toes. You hardly register that he’s coming with you, filling you deep with his come. His jaw is clenched tight and he’s groaning, grunting as he milks himself in you.

He leaves you there, whimpering, twitching on the bed. You hear the faint sound of running water, you figure he’s washing himself off. You’re surprised when he returns to you, pelvis covered in your blood, and scoops you right up in his arms. He helps you to your feet and on shaky legs, guides you to the bathroom. It no longer smells like bleach but instead, lavender. He’s got a candle lit on the sink and the bathtub is filled with warm, bubbly water. “Picked out a bubble bath for you earlier when I went out. Wanna test it out with me?” 

“Yeah,” you sniffle. “Yes. Please.” 

Joel sits in the tub first, spreads his legs and welcomes you to sit between them. He washes the blood from your poor, sensitive core and your thighs, washes it from his own body as well. When he’s done, he pulls you back into his chest and his hands find your breasts. “They’re tender, huh,” he murmurs into the side of your head. 

“Super, yeah. Sore.” 

“I’ll bet,” he says. He gently massages the tissue for you, his strong hands working you out in a way you can’t quite do. 

“Thank you,” you whisper. 

Joel chuckles. “Bout fuckin’ time you thanked me,” he says. “You’re welcome.” 

If you enjoyed, please reblog with thoughts, leave me a comment, or send me an ask! Your words motivate me to keep writing for you all 🩷

Least helpful cats award goes to these two 👇 if you’ve ever wondered what takes me so long to put fics out, it’s this. I try to write and I’m cockblocked by these fuzzballs.

[sourcherryandsprinkles]

How about Aegon or Aemond corrupting jace's twin? Maybe Aegon does the corrupting and Aemond is into her?

The list of morally wrong things in this one is astronomical, but it’s House of the Dragon so it’s okay. Also, this is part 1 (let me know what should happen in the next part!). I wanted to wait until it was fully finished to post, but this is 6k already so I'm splitting it

Warnings: 18+, smut, uncle/niece incest, corruption, fingering, oral (m receiving), non-consensual touch (not by Aegon or Aemond), protective!Aegon,

my taglists are here + you can send requests here at any time

—

It all began when a letter from your grandsire arrived at Dragonstone, inviting you to spend summer in King’s Landing. You hadn't seen your grandsire since his fiftieth namedays, which was about two years ago, so you were more than pleased to accept his invitation. The gardens were beautiful in the summer…and you hadn’t seen Haelena in a while. 

It was absolutely not in the hopes to see your uncles again.

‘’Are you out of your mind? You’re going straight to the dragons’ den! Have you forgotten how they treated us all these tears we lived there?’’ Jacaerys said, walking into your bedchamber like it was his own.

The news of your summer plans must have reached his ears after his lesson with the Maester. 

‘’They’re not horrible people, you just never got along with them,’’ you fired back at your twin brother as you continued packing your bags for tomorrow.  

Growing up, your brothers had a few differences with Aegon and Aemond — many stupid fights and a lot of bullying on both ends —, but you never had the same treatment. Mayhaps it was because you were spending more time with Haelena than the boys. Or mayhaps they just took their teasing too seriously. 

Jacaerys was not letting it go. ‘’They called you a bastard in your back, like they did Luke and I.’’ 

The first time you heard the word from Aegon’s mouth, it hurt you. Being a bastard was badly seen. Especially for the children of the heir of the Iron throne. His slur branded your mother as a whore. 

Having heard, Jacaerys had come forward, the two pushing and shoving until Ser Criston and Ser Harwin separated them. When informed that a fight had occured in the courtyard between Aegon and Jace, your mother was mad at Jacaerys but also flattered that he had defended her honor. 

‘’We both know the truth about our father, Jace,’’ you reminded him, refusing to be blind. 

Although you and your brothers were conceived from an infidelity, you didn’t feel shame in being your father’s child. You remembered Ser Harwin being around in King’s Landing and making your mother happy. He was a kind and honorable man. Leanor was rarely ever present. 

‘’If the court finds out about our father, I won’t be recognized as heir. They’ll never allow a bastard to sit on the Iron Throne.’’

‘’We’re Targaryens, and that’s all that matters, all you need to sit on the throne,’’ you insisted. ‘’Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to finish packing.’’

⁂

At your return from King’s Landing, you’ll be meeting suitors — which you dreaded. That meant that this summer was going to be the last summer before becoming a wife. The thought of getting married made your stomach churn. Marriage was not something that interested you — at all. Like your mother, you would much rather ride your dragon and travel than live in a Lord’s castle and start a family.

Your arrival was announced to the King, who summoned you in the throne room. 

He stood from the throne as you approached, a smile spreading across his face. ‘’Ah, there you are,’’ Viserys said warmly, stepping down to meet you. ‘’It's good to see you back in King's Landing.’’

You returned the smile. ‘’Thank you for the invitation, Your Grace,’’ you replied respectfully.  

‘’You’ve grown,’’ Viserys remarked, his gaze appraising you. ‘’And you inherited your grandmother's beauty.’’

Though you never had the chance to meet Queen Aemma, you knew it was a compliment. The King always spoke fondly of his late wife.

‘’I’ll be ten and eight soon,’’ you informed him. 

‘’Already?’’ The King raised an eyebrow and you nodded. ‘’Time flies, doesn’t it? We’ll have a tourney in your and Jacaerys’ honor. My first grand-children turning ten and eight, it deserves to be celebrated.’’

⁂

You changed out of your traveling dress, then went looking for your aunt and uncles. 

First, you spotted Aegon soaring overhead on Sunfyre, the golden dragon gleaming in the sunlight. He had gotten so large and beautiful. You’ll have to ask Aegon to ride together next time he goes. 

Next, you made your way to the training yard, where you knew Aemond often spent his time. As expected, you found him there, sparring with Ser Criston, his movements swift and precise. He was much better than your brothers at sparring, you mentally noted.

You called his name excitedly as you stepped down the stairs, which you realized was a mistake when he almost got taken down by Ser Criston. You apologized, but Aemond shook his head. 

‘’No harm done,’’ he assured you, putting away his sword and walking over to you. 

The last time you were in this training yard, you kicked Aemond’s ass. You were only kids, but it was still one of your greatest victories. Sword-fighting was in your blood. With a little bit of training, you would be as great as the boys in this yard.

‘’Can you still hold a sword, Princess?’’ 

⁂

You and Aemond cleaned up just in time for dinner, where you greeted the Queen and Helaena. They had the same hairstyle, which reminded of you and your mother, Rhaenyra. Children look up to their parents.

After dinner, you, Helaena, Aemond and Aegon retired to the latter’s chamber and spent the evening talking, laughing and eating small cakes and other sweet treats that you had requested from the kitchens.  

‘’These pastries are divine,’’ you said, loving the bitter raspberry mixed with the sweetness of the tart. ‘’We don’t have anything like this on Dragonstone.’’ You took another bite, humming at the taste.

Just as you finished your third tart, Aegon stood and excused himself. ‘’It's been wonderful having you here, dear niece, but duty calls.’’

You glanced out the window, noticing the silver glow of the moon and the twinkling stars against the dark sky. ‘’At late hour?’’ 

Aegon paused for a moment, a confident smirk spreading across his face. ‘’Some duties can only be fulfilled at night,’’ he declared cryptically, his gaze flickering mischievously towards Aemond, who could only shake his head in response.

‘’I wouldn't exactly call it duty,’’ Aemond remarked, trailing off as Aegon interjected with a mischievous grin.

‘’A treat, then,’’ the older prince continued, redirecting his attention to you with a knowing look. ‘’You enjoy pastries. I, however, have a preference for women.’’

Confusion clouded your expression. ‘’What do you mean?’’

‘’Sex,’’ Aegon declared boldly, his eyes gleaming with mischief. 

Your gaze fell to your feet, color rising in your cheeks. ‘’Oh.’’ 

Aegon's lips twitched with amusement at your reaction. ‘’Ever had sex, dear niece?’’ 

‘’Aegon,’’ Aemond interjected, his voice a warning.

You shook your head. 

It was a good thing that Helaena had fallen asleep or she would have covered her ears. Sex always made her uncomfortable. 

‘’Not even with yourself?’’ Aegon continued. 

Confusion struck your face. ‘’Eh, no.’’

‘’You’re missing out.’’ 

⁂

Every night, you watched from your window as Aegon sneaked out through the secret passageway of the Red Keep. You had discovered these passageways when you were playing hide and seek as kids. Aemond always complained that hiding there was cheating, but you and Aegon did it anyway.

You couldn't help but wonder what was so great about sex that made him go out every night.  

One night, you decided to follow him. The curiosity was too much to resist. 

You snuck early through the secret passageways and waited for any sign of Aegon's approach. The damp, narrow corridors brought back memories of your childhood games. 

Finally, you heard his familiar footsteps echoing down the passage. As he rounded the corner, you stepped out of the shadows. 

‘’What is my favorite niece doing here?’’ Aegon asked, raising an eyebrow. He had a dark cloak over his shoulders, covering any signs that could give his identity away in the city. 

You took a deep breath, your heart pounding in your chest. ‘’I want to come to the pleasure house with you.’’ 

Aegon stared at you for a moment, then laughed. 

‘’I'm serious, Aegon. I…I want to know about sex.’’ You tried to make your voice confident, knowing Aegon would send you to your chamber if he sensed a sliver of uncertainness. 

Taking your hand in his, Aegon led you through the maze of streets and alleys. It was bustling with people. Merchants and artisanal liquor sellers were pushing their beverages at you, almost forcing you to have a taste. Some people were drunk and stumbling about, while some were playing instruments with surprising skill, their melodies blending with the occasional fights breaking out nearby. You could hear obscene sounds from darkened alleys, adding to the chaotic symphony of the night. 

It was your first time coming to the city, and the overwhelming sights and sounds made you clung to Aegon, not wishing to get lost. 

He came to a stop when you reached a dark wooden door. Aegon pushed it open and pulled you inside. 

The stuffy air hit you immediately, making you wrinkle your nose. Aegon took off his hood, but didn’t let go of you. You were under his responsibility tonight. Around you, people lounged around in various states of undress, some lost in laughter, others in more intimate activities that brought a pink tint to your cheeks. 

Aegon made a stop to the bar, ordering two cups of wine. One for him, and one for you. 

‘’Drink,’’ he said. ‘’It’s nothing like what we have at the Keep, but it'll help you relax.’’ 

You took the glass and sipped tentatively, the sour taste of the wine making you grimace. He was right about this wine being disgusting. You had to force it down your throat. 

‘’What do you do when you come here?’’ you asked, looking around with a mix of curiosity and unease.

Aegon leaned against the bar as he downed the rest of his drink. ‘’I get my cock sucked. Or I fuck some whore. Depends how I’m feeling that night.’’ 

His bluntness caught you off guard, and you felt your cheeks flush. ‘’What of me? How do I…’’ You bit your lip, the words shy on your tongue. ‘’I don’t have a cock.’’ 

‘’You don’t need a cock for pleasure.’’ Aegon set his empty cup on the bar. ‘’Come with me.’’ 

You followed him through the mass of people, avoiding touching or being touched by anyone. Some of these people were very handsy and pushy, asking for things you didn’t quite understand. 

One the way, a woman approached Aegon, her dress barely clinging to her body. She smiled seductively at him, her eyes flicking to you briefly before returning to him. ‘’Care for some company tonight, my prince?’’ she purred, hoping to make some good money tonight. 

Aegon glanced at you, as if gauging your reaction, then back at the woman. ‘’Not tonight.’’

The whore looked at you behind Aegon, giving you a full stare down, and glared. Did she take you for another whore? In your silk dress and jewelry around your neck?

You followed your uncle to a room, gasping in shock when you saw a woman being penetrated by two men. One was standing at her head, her mouth wrapped around him. Spit was dribbling from her mouth, but she didn’t seem to care. And the other was thrusting into her from behind, loud moans leaving their mouths. To your right, a woman with saggy breasts was bouncing on a bearded man’s cock. She craned her head back to kiss her partner, sweat covering both their bodies. 

It was not at all what you had expected. No one seemed shy or embarrassed of exposing themself in front of so many people. In fact, they didn’t seem to care at all. They were just there to take what they needed. 

‘’Don’t listen to what your Septa told you. Sex is not just for baby-making, sex is for pleasure. For the woman as it is for the man,’’ Aegon purred into your ear as you watched the people around you. ‘’Men find pleasure from their cock.’’ He pointed to a man getting his male part sucked, his head thrown back and moaning. ‘’And women from their cunny.’’ He pointed to two women in a corner, one with her hand between her partner’s legs. She seemed to be feeling great pleasure, you noticed.  ‘’Although most people here indulge in penetrative sex, penetration is not necessary for pleasure. You can find that same pleasure — at least similar to — by yourself.’’

‘’I want to try,’’ you stated, wanting to feel the same pleasure as her. 

Aegon shook his head. ‘’We’re only here to watch. I’m not letting any of these men get their hands on you.’’

You frowned. ‘’How am I supposed to learn?’’ 

Aegon motioned for one of the unoccupied whores to come up to him. Her hair was brown and very long. He gave her body a few caresses, then pointed at you as he explained something to her. She nodded in understanding and took your hand, leading you to a corner where a ‘bed’ was not being used.

‘’Larissa is gonna teach you the ways to pleasure,’’ Aegon explained. 

⁂

On your return from the brothel, you said a giggly ‘good night’ to Aegon and disappeared inside your chamber, excited to undress and try what Larissa had taught you. You had studied her movements, which had triggered tingly feelings between your legs. 

You unlaced your dress and boots, then flopped down on your bed. You opened your legs, exposing your pussy, and took a short moment to look down at it. It was different from Larissa’s. Your hair density was different and you didn’t have the floppy skin she called ‘petals’, but you didn’t think too much of it. All bodies were different, she said. 

The cool air of the room made the throbbing between your legs worse. Was this how it was supposed to feel? 

Tentatively, you lowered one hand between your legs, right against your throbbing core, and breathlessly gasped when you made contact with your sensitive skin. You threw your head back against the wall and closed your eyes at the new found sensation. 

Wetness stuck to your fingers and you pressed harder against your core, causing your eyelashes to flutter. ‘’Ahh.’’ 

Your fingers traced the seam of your slit, spreading the wetness around. Each touch sent waves of sensation through you, making you want more. Taking it to the next level, you swiped between your folds, causing you to moan as soon as you met your sensitive flesh. 

You continued doing so, humming in delight and feeling yourself relax more into the sensations your fingers were bringing. Why had no one told you about this kind of pleasure before? It was much better than eating raspberry tarts. 

Another moan slipped past your lips, the tingly feeling between your legs intensifying. You pushed your hips down onto your hand and sighed softly, arching your back from the bed. But it wasn't enough. 

Something inside you was tingling. 

Finding no better ways to relieve these tingles, you slid your middle finger inside of yourself. Immediately, your walls closed around your finger, warm and wet. It felt strange — and sinful. You began moving it in and out, your mouth opening to form an ‘O’ shape. 

‘’Oh Gods…’’ 

You began pumping your finger in and out a bit faster, thinking it was what you needed, but it did not make the tingles go away. It did feel good, but after a moment, your hand was getting tired and the tingles were growing more intense. 

‘’What am I doing wrong?’’ you asked aloud, feeling frustrated. 

⁂

On the morrow, after your afternoon tea with Helaena, you knocked on Aegon’s door. He rarely left his chambers during the day — other than for dinner or to ride Sunfire —, so you knew he would be there. 

Taking a deep breath, you knocked on the heavy wooden door. The sound echoed in the quiet hallway. Moments later, the door creaked open, revealing Aegon in his usual princely attire. His silver hair was tousled, and his eyes had a tired look. 

‘’I need your help,’’ you said, not wasting time with formal greetings. ‘’Something seems wrong with my body, I’m afraid…’’ 

Aegon raised an eyebrow, leaning against the doorframe. ‘’What do you mean?’’

You hesitated, second thinking if you should be going to him about your intimate problems. After all, Aegon had boy parts, how could he help you? ‘’What Larissa taught me last night, it is not working. I tried, but I cannot…make the tingles go away. My finger is not enough.’’ 

Aegon's expression shifted from curious to alarmed as he glanced on both sides of the halfway, making sure no one had heard you. If anyone knew of your little escapade into the city, Aegon would be in a lot of trouble. 

Then, he stepped aside, gesturing for you to enter quickly. The room was somber despite the large window dorning over the city, and the bed was unmade. You couldn’t say you were surprised by the latter. 

Aegon shut the door behind you, pulling you out of your observation, and turned to face you. ‘’You should be more careful of the matters you speak about outside closed doors. You would be surprised by the number of ill intentioned ears that are waiting for bad whispers in this castle.’’

You nodded, having not thought of that. On Dragonstone, there weren't as many maids or servants.  They mostly assisted your mother and the younger children, or busied themselves with cleaning tasks in the lower floors of the castle. 

‘’Take a seat,’’ Aegon invited, sitting down in a large velvet chair at the center of the room and gesturing towards a loveseat right across for you. ‘’And tell exactly what you mean by ‘not enough’.’’ 

You pursed your lips, trying to find the right words. ‘’I do not know how to put it into words… All I know is that when I inserted my finger inside myself, it felt good. But the tingles intensified and my finger wasn’t enough anymore. A-am I broken, Aegon?’’ 

He laughed quietly at the last remark. ‘’Broken? No. You’re not broken, my darling. You’re simply not doing it quite right. You see, in order to truly satisfy yourself when you’re all alone…a finger simply isn’t enough.’’ Aegon leaned in his seat, speaking closer to you. ‘’Would you like me to show you how to truly do it, properly?’’

You were most certain that you should not be doing this, but going back to the brothel was not a possibility at the moment. It was likely closed during the daytime and, although Helaena was a woman, you doubted she could be of help. 

Aegon stood and pulled you with him, guiding you to his bed. ‘’Lay down. Make yourself comfortable.’’

You scooted back until you hit the pillows, glaring at the sheet when your foot got stuck in it. If Aegon would make his bed in the mornings, it would not have happened. 

Once you were settled, he pulled your dress up, letting the layers bunch at your hips and pushed your legs apart. You were completely exposed to him, and rather than feeling uncomfortable under your uncle’s gaze, you spread yourself wider, desperate to feel good. 

‘’Gods,’’ Aegon growled under his breath. His hand gently rubbed your inner thigh, caressing your soft skin. ‘’You have one magnificent cunny, dear niece.’’ He moved his hand up the inside of your thigh, gently playing with your soft sparse hair there, almost teasingly. ‘’Makes me want to kiss it.’’ 

You whined, feeling a tinge of shyness at his compliment. ‘’Aegon…’’ 

‘’I mean it. I’ve seen a lot in my short life, but none ever compared.’’ He pressed his fingers firmly against you, making you mewl from the contact. 

It felt different from your own fingers. More pleasurable. 

Aegon kept up the circular motions, using a bit more pressure, as he watched your expression flicker with pleasure, your mouth open and eyebrows knitted as a moan slipped from your lips. He began swiping his thumb over your clit and it made you moan so loud anyone who was passing in the hallway must’ve heard. 

Your reaction made Aegon chuckle, amused. He brought a finger over your lips, shushing you. ‘’If you do this again, you’re gonna alert one of the maids. We don't want that, do we?’’ He stroked a piece of your hair, looking at you like you were the most beautiful woman he laid his eyes on.

You shook your head. ‘’I-I’ll be quiet,’’ you promised.

‘’Now, I’m going to put my fingers inside of you,’’ he explained as two fingers slipped down and entered you, sinking between your folds.

You gasped and pushed your hips against Aegon’s hand, realizing this was exactly what you needed. ‘’Ahh, this feels so good.’’

Aegon’s smirk widened, his eyes darkening with desire as he felt your hips move against him. ‘’See, nothing is broken. You just needed uncle Aegon’s help.’’ He increased the pace a bit, his fingers moving rapidly as your breath came in short gasps and moans as your mind got lost in the sensations. 

Your whole body was on fire, trembling by need as his thumb started rubbing your clit again. You felt the heat inside yourself intensify, you could feel the release you so desperately craved was building. 

You whined, grabbing the sheets next to you. ‘’A-Aegon, something feels strange. I think— I think I’m going to pee.’’ 

You squeezed your eyes shut and focused on not wetting the bed. How embarrassing would that be?  

‘’You’re not going to pee. Don’t worry.’’ Aegon continued his ministrations. ‘’This is good. This is exactly what you want.’’ 

‘’No. I’m going to pee, I’m going to—’’ You interrupted yourself as your back arched off the bed as your final release hit you, your hands fisting one of the pillows so hard you almost pierced a hole with your fingernails. 

Aegon’s free hand covered your mouth just in time, muffling your cries while you rode out your pleasure on his hand. 

⁂

You sat on your vanity chair while servants were cleaning up the aftermath of your bath. Your chamber smelled of lavender oil, which you poured into the water to help get a great night of sleep. The beds were luxurious in the Red Keep, but it lacked the comfort of home. 

‘’Will it be all, Princess?’’ your handmaid asked after brushing your freshly washed hair. 

You thanked her for her service. ‘’Yes. Thank you, Dyana.’’ 

‘’I will see you in the morning, Princess.’’ 

Dyana left your chambers, and you waited for the servants to do the same. You didn't want to press them, but you were impatient to watch them leave. 

Once everyone was out, you laid on your bed and pulled up your nightgown. 

At supper, you had sat across Aegon and your eyes had fallen on his hand holding his goblet of wine. Precisely his long, thick, and dexterous fingers. You knew it was sinful to have such thoughts during a family meal, but you had been unable to keep yourself from thinking about the intense pleasure Aegon's fingers brought you. You had to clamp your thighs under the table, feeling a needy ache in your cunny. 

Your fingertips skimmed over your folds, and you let out a small moan. You've been waiting all evening to do that. Your index finger slipped down to the pearl Aegon touched this afternoon and you made small, soft circles around it. A jolt of pleasure went up your spine. That felt so good. You continued rubbing soft circles, causing arousal to leak down your cunny. 

You ceased the attention to your clit and brought your middle finger down to your entrance, spreading your wetness before sinking your finger inside. A sweet moan echoed in the room, but you reminded yourself to be quiet. Always quiet. 

Closing your eyes, you imagined Aegon slipping his long, thick fingers deep inside you. Your walls clenched down on your finger, and then you slipped in a second. 

‘’Ah, Aegon.’’

Like the night prior, your fingers were too small to reach where you needed. Frowning in frustration, you searched around your chamber for something that resembled a finger. There was a forgotten spoon from when you had tea brought up — too small — and a wooden stick used to roll parchment paper — too big. Lastly, you saw your hairbrush on your vanity. Perfect. The handle of it was smooth, it shouldn’t hurt.

You wiped your fingers on the sheets and got up to grab it. You brought the hairbrush handle down to your cunny and paused. Although you were alone in your chamber, you couldn’t help but worry you would get in trouble if anyone found out about this. Shaking that thought, you cautiously pressed the handle to your hole, and steadily pushed it in. You felt your cunny squeezing and slighting bucking your hips at the brush. 

The sensation was foreign, but not unpleasant. As you pressed the handle deeper, you let out a soft gasp, quickly covering your mouth with your free hand to stifle any more sounds. You moved the brush handle gently at first, allowing your body to adjust to the unfamiliar intrusion.

Your other hand moved back to your clit, resuming the soft circles that had felt so good before. The combined sensations were intense, sending waves of pleasure through you. Your breath was short and your eyes fluttered closed as you imagined Aegon with you, his fingers instead of the brush.

The handle moved in and out, your movements growing more urgent as tears formed at the corner of your eyes, overwhelmed by pleasure. Your hips rocked against it, whining needily as you felt the pressure building, your muscles tightening as you edged closer to climax. Your walls clenched around the handle, and with one final push, the pleasure overwhelmed you. Your body shook with the force of your orgasm, your back arching off the bed. 

You stayed there for a moment, panting and trembling, the handle still inside you. That felt… You couldn’t find any words to describe it. 

Slowly, you pulled the hairbrush out, and placed it on the bed. Its handle was coated with your slick but you didn’t bother to clean it, pulling the covers over your body and drifting to sleep. 

⁂

‘’Good morrow, Uncle,’’ you greeted, crossing paths with Aemond in the halls of the Red Keep after breaking fast.

Aemond gave you a short nod.  ‘’Good morrow, Princess.’’

‘’Are you heading to the dragonpit?’’ you asked, noting the faint scent of smoke clinging to his black leather riding doublet. 

‘’No. Returning, actually.’’

A pout formed on your lips, disappointed. ‘’That's unfortunate. I was heading there and hoping we could go together. I would go with Aegon, but he is not a morning person, as you know.’’

‘’We could go in the morrow after breaking fast?’’ Aemond suggested, watching as a smile lit your face. 

⁂

Just as you were about to seek servants and ask them to prepare you a bath, Aegon knocked on your door and asked if you wanted to join him for another night in the city. He didn’t have any friends to accompany him, and Aemond was too much of a prude to go to brothels. Although you were younger, you didn’t have a stick up your ass. 

On the way, Aegon dropped a few gold coins and got you sweets from a street baker. He wiped the cherry glaze on your lips with his thumb, sucking it into his mouth. 

You sat at a table and indulged in wine amongst the men. Around you, women were dancing in their smallest clothes, entertaining the customers inside the brothel. Beside you, Aegon watched the curious fascination on your face while sipping his wine, pleased to see you were having fun. He made sure to drink enough to relax, but not too much he wouldn’t be able to keep an eye out.

When you finished your cup, Aegon rose to his feet and took you to the back of the brothel. Excitement was bubbling in your stomach, hearing the sounds of pleasure coming from men and women behind each of the curtains. 

As you entered one of the rooms, a woman came up to Aegon and begged to suck his cock for free, desperately wanting a taste of the prince. She was only wearing a piece of cloth tied into a skirt, her small breasts and pointy nipples bared to all. 

‘’Watch and learn, little one. Your future husband will enjoy this,’’ Aegon said with a wink. 

He shoved his breeches down, exposing his surprisingly large cock to everyone in the room. You stared at it with wide eyes. Were all the cocks big? You peaked around you, searching for comparisons, but nothing seemed to come close. 

When you drew your eyes back to your uncle, the woman was kneeling before Aegon, his cock already in her mouth. The action surprised you, but you took notes and watched as she bobbed her head down his shaft, sucking and slurping as spit dribbled from her mouth. Your eyes flickered to Aegon, who was groaning, taking pleasure from the woman’s mouth. 

‘’Agh, fuck,’’ he slurred, his head slightly back. ‘’That mouth is made to suck cocks!’’ 

On the ground, the woman looked satisfied to please him. She moaned as Aegon grabbed a fistful of her hair and forced himself deeper into her mouth, groaning obscenely until he released his semen down her throat. Some spilled from her lips, but Aegon didn’t wipe it off like he did with the cherry glaze. He pushed her off him and re-dressed himself. 

‘’Do all men enjoy this?’’ you asked. 

He chuckled softly before responding. His eyes met your wide, curious gaze. ‘’Oh yes, most men enjoy it very much. Now, would you like another cup of wine?’’ 

You smiled. ‘’Please.’’ 

You sat on a couch by yourself, waiting for Aegon’s return. Before you, a woman was getting her cunny pounded by a bearded man. She moaned loudly, grabbing at her nipples. The sight made you think of the hairbrush you had inserted in yourself last night. It had filled you up nicely, but you couldn’t help but wonder how delightful a cock must feel.

Lost in your thoughts, you didn’t notice the man who approached you until he grabbed your hand and placed it on his cock. You froze, a bewildered look on your face. He said something, but you couldn’t hear it, too focused on how clammy and hairy he felt. You tried to retract your hand, but he gripped it tightly, forcing you to rub him.

The Gods must have heard your prayers because Aegon returned with the wine and saw what was happening. His jaw clenched, and his eyes narrowed in anger. He quickly stepped in, his presence commanding attention.

‘’Let go of her or I’ll cut your fucking cock,’’ he threatened through clenched teeth, his hand on the dagger tucked into his belt. His voice was low and deadly, leaving no doubt that he meant every word.

The man’s eyes widened in surprise when he heard Aegon, and his grip on your hand loosened enough for you to slip away. You wiped it on the skirt of your dress, trying to erase the feeling of the stranger’s cock. Washing them with soap and water would have been better, but there was no bassin to do so.

‘’I-I apologize, my prince. I did not know the whore was yours—’’ the man stuttered, making excuses, but  Aegon didn’t want to hear them. 

He grabbed his shoulder and pinned him against the wall, bringing the dagger to his throat.  The man's eyes widened further as the dagger's blade pressed against his skin, fear flashing on his face. ‘’She’s not a fucking whore,’’ Aegon’s voice was low and dangerous, his eyes burning with rage. 

The man swallowed hard. ‘’I-I apologize again, my prince. I meant no disrespect.’’

Aegon took a step closer, the dagger still at the man's throat. ‘’Don’t. Touch. Her. Again.’’ He looked down at his manly parts, then back at his face. ‘’Unless you want to lose your little cock.’’ 

 ⁂

The journey back to the Red Keep was silent. Aegon's grip on your hand was tight, his knuckles white from the tension. He was fuming, his eyes still narrowed in anger, his mind clearly still consumed by anger from the incident at the brothel. He kept you close, his gaze scanning the surroundings to ensure no one else tried to approach you. 

When you finally reached the safety of the castle, he stopped in his tracks and turned to you. Guilt was consuming him. What happened was his fault. If he hadn’t left your side, this man would not have forced your delicate hand on his filthy cock.

Aegon opened his mouth to speak, then shook his head. He walked past you, abandoning you in the secret passages. 

—

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[hannibals-favourite-meal]

Mutual worship between Steve Harrington X fem reader who is also like El with the powers or her sister, and she uses them to save him and it's like love at first sight for them, and he tries to prove to her that he is still not in love with Nancy and they give each other a chance

.⋆｡Soft Hands｡⋆.

Steve Harrington x plus size reader

You were meant to be a weapon, the failed experiment before your sister but he sees you as something so much more

Warnings: smut, oral (m and f receiving), protected sex, some angst, reader is El’s sister but no description is given, some blood, telekinetic!reader, jealousy, implied virgin!reader, insecurity WC: 2.1k

6k Follower Bingo Celebration

Library- @hannibals-favourite-meal-library

The feel of another person’s skin against your own was something entirely foreign in to you. The warmth was almost overwhelming to your delicate nerves but you found yourself craving more of it. 

“Steve.” Your fingers tangled in his perfect hair, tugging on the thick locks as his lips continued along their path down your chest. His toned stomach was plastered to your soft one, as if he were unable to part from you for even a single moment. His fingers dug into the fat of your hips as he wedged his body between your thighs.

“Beautiful.” He murmured reverently, sending a jolt up your spine. Your back arched and you tugged him closer.

——————

You could see the fear in their eyes, practically fucking smell it as the kids pressed together, your sister disappearing behind their small shoulders. You almost scoffed at their pathetic attempt to keep you back. “I’m not here to take her.”

“Yeah cause we won’t let you.” The one with the curly hair spat out, puffing up his chest in some vain attempt to look bigger. Eleven’s head popped up between his and another boy’s, the ghost of a smile on her lips. You sighed.

“Is there at least an adult looking out for all of you?” The boys glanced at each other then sent their glares back at you.

“We have a Steve.” 

“And who is that?” 

“Me.” An older boy stepped out of the shadows of the forest, a baseball bat over his broad shoulder, his jaw set. But his brown eyes were bright as they traced the curves of your body. And for the first time in your life, something stirred deep in your stomach.

——————

Your heels dug into his shoulder blades as Steve finally reached his destination. He was not shy in the way his tongue lapped up the slick juices that covered your inner thighs like it was the only thing he craved. Your teeth sunk into your bottom lip, muffling your moans as best you could.

The tip of his sharp nose brushed against your clit. “Fuck you taste so good baby.” He groaned, tugging your thighs upwards so he could delve deeper between them. You gasped and clutched at the back of his head.

“S-Steve.” You felt him smirk against your pussy before he finally took mercy on you. 

“It’s ok, I’ve got you baby girl.” Pleasure ricocheted through you, sparking a warm hum to spread across your skin, the weight of his arms around your lower stomach keeping you pinned as he feasted.

——————

“We need to get out of here now!” Steve’s voice was barely audible over the rumble of the earth above you.

“There’s not enough time!” A chunk of the concrete ceiling groaned and broke away, slamming down barely a yard from where you and Steve were standing. Your heart pounded loudly in your ears as panic quickly filled your veins. You couldn’t quite remember how exactly you had gotten here; a fight with your sister, then Steve, then you wanted to hunt down your makers yourself but the idiot King of Hawkins had refused to leave you alone. 

A wrong code entered into one of the ancient computers or maybe it had been a booby trap in the elevator but what mattered now was that an entire underground facility was about to come down on top of your heads.

Steve grabbed your wrist, fully intent on bolting for the elevator but you knew it was far too late. With all your might, you pulled Steve back into you. He stumbled but caught himself, his arms winding around your thick waist as you raised your own above your heads.

Power rippled through you, projecting outwards in a wave. Your body began to tremble as thousands of pounds of concrete and earth fell on top of you. Steve held you even tighter, his body curling around your own, as if he expected your power to fail at any moment and it would be his turn to protect you.

Blood dripped from your nose as the wave grew bigger, pushing away the material that almost entombed you. Just as the first light of morning broke through the haze of brown and grey, you blacked out, falling against Steve’s chest.

“It’s ok, I’ve got you.”

——————

“Ah god please baby, you’re killing me here.” Steve threw his head back against the pillows, his fists curled into the sheets on his bed. You smiled shyly against his pelvis, his cock resting against your full cheek. Your pussy clenched around nothing at how hot he felt against your skin, the way he throbbed as soon as his eyes met yours.

“So pretty Stevie.” You mumbled, pressing a gentle kiss to the base of his cock. Steve’s entire body flinched and he grabbed the sheets even tighter. You inhaled his thick scent, determined to commit it to memory, though you doubted this would be the last time you would be in this position.

You shifted onto your forearms, letting his cock fall back against his belly. A thick drop of pre-cum splattering against the dark hair below his belly button. “An’ it’s all mine.” Your tongue poked out from between your lips and you licked up the entire length of him, refusing to break eye-contact with him. 

Slowly, your lips wrapped around his tip, savouring the way he tasted on your tongue. Steve’s moan echoed through the bedroom.

——————

The alcohol in your veins made your body vibrate with a pleasant buzz. Nancy had somehow convinced you and Robin to have a ‘grown-ups girl’s night’ with some pizza, crappy horror movies and a couple bottles of wine she had somehow gotten her hands on. 

You were actually feeling care-free for possibly the first time in your life. 

You sat on the love seat by the couch, Robin sitting on the ground between your legs as Nancy trapped herself over the couch, an empty wine glass hanging precariously between her fingers.

“I’m telling you! Jonathan is absolutely godly in bed.” Robin made a gagging noise that made you dissolve into yet another round of giggling. Nancy just rolled her eyes and continued. “I mean he’s so much better than Steve was. God that man was selfish! Can’t tell you how many times I faked it.”

Your stomach dropped but in her inebriated state, Nancy didn’t notice your now sour expression. “I can’t even tell you how many girls he’s slept with and he was still shit at giving head.” She couldn’t be talking about your Steve could she? Not the Steve that showed you all the music and pop culture you had been missing out on. Not the Steve who would comfort you after your nightmares. Not the Steve who made heat crawl up your cheeks and your heart stutter.

“Steve?” Your voice trembled and Robin looked up at you, her brows scrunched.

“Yeah! Steve Harrington! Don’t know how that man ever got one girl into bed let alone the entire senior year.” She scoffed and went to take a sip from her glass, only to find it empty. “Need more wine.” She murmured and shakily got to her feet, her determined steps disappearing into the kitchen.

Robin’s fingers against your knee broke you from the downward spiral you quickly found yourself falling into. “You ok?”

You wiped the tears from your cheek as you nodded, your voice escaping you.

——————

The crinkle of the foil packet grounded your hazy mind. You were on your back once more, comfortably nestled in the mountain of pillows that smelled just like him. Steve looked ethereal in the yellow lamplight, the sweat along his torso was like drops of molten gold highlighting the dark hair that seemed to cover every inch of him. His chest heaved as he struggled to catch his breath and concentrate on the condom in his hands.

“Steve.” You urged, desperation bleeding into your tone. His long eyelashes fluttered as he let out a whine.

“I know baby, I know.” He ripped the top clean off, throwing the wrapper over his shoulder the moment he pulled the latex out. Your legs wrapped around his thin hips, urging him closer all while he rolled the condom down his length. He gripped himself by the base as he leaned down, plating his right hand by your head.

“You’ll tell me if it hurts?” You nodded frantically, making him chuckle softly and press a kiss to your lips. His head notched against your entrance, the threat of how far he would stretch you already palpable. He slowly pushed forwards, letting go of himself in favour of holding your hip.

You gasped and clutched at his left hand. Your fingers intertwined as he held both your hands against your soft stomach. He bottomed out with a groan, leaving your mind empty save for the feeling of just how full you were.

——————

“I just don’t get it!” You fought the urge to roll your eyes, anger still swirling in your gut. Steve was almost hysterical at this point but you didn’t care anymore. “I thought we were friends! And now you’re what, leaving Hawkins without even a good-bye?!” 

You slammed the suitcase shut, a parting gift from Hopper who was now acting as your sister’s guardian. “Yeah well my understanding of social interaction may be severely lacking but I don’t think friends are supposed to lie to each other.” You finally turned to face him, and for just a moment, you wanted to rethink your entire plan. 

Steve’s eyes were shining with tears, the tip of his nose the same shade of red as his cheeks. “When have I ever lied to you? Better yet, what would I lie to you about? Cause I’m damn-well sure that I’ve only ever been honest with you.”

“Really?” You glared at the boy, “So what do you call Nancy?” 

He huffed. “What the fuck about Nancy?”

“You dated her! You kissed her! You-“ You swallowed harshly, unwilling to let anymore tears fall for this boy, “You dated her and you never told me.”

“Is that why you’re leaving? Because I didn’t tell you about my dating history?” The flush that crawled up his neck now was decidedly not from sadness or some sense of betrayal, this was anger. “I thought you didn’t care about all that. You told me you didn’t when we were at the lake.”

“Because I didn’t know that she was one of them!” You snapped. 

The fight suddenly left you then and you sagged down onto the small cot you had been using as a bed. You sniffled, your eyes burning with tears you had already cried. Steve blinked, seemingly coming back into himself as you whispered. “Why didn’t you tell me that she was one of them?”

Steve kneeled in front of you, gently placing his hands on your knees like he was trying to comfort a spooked animal. “Why does this matter so much? Nancy is in the past for me, the way past. She’s not the girl I really want.”

“But she’s perfect. She’s not a killer, she’s not damaged.” Your fists clenched at your sides as your chest burned. You knew it had all been too good to be true, there was no way Steve had liked you, you were just safe. You knew how to keep secrets, that’s why he confided in you on that dark night by Lover’s Lake.

Steve scoffed. “I’ve seen Nancy wield a sawed off shotgun better than she can hold a pencil. I think she’s more of a killer than you.” He tried to take your hand but you snatched it away and stood up, darting to the other side of the room, out of his reach.

“That’s not the point!”

“Then what is?” He begged, still on his knees.

“That I’m a monster and I stupidly thought that I wasn’t and let myself believe.” Your arms curled around your stomach, avoiding his eyes as much as possible. 

“Believe what?” He sounded angry again but you couldn’t bring yourself to care, not anymore.

“That I could be loved.” Steve slowly rose to his feet.

“You’re a fucking idiot.”He grabbed your jaw and slammed his lips to yours as your nails bit into his shoulders.

——————

The room was stuffy and stunk of sex but neither of you dared to move even an inch, not wanting to break the peaceful bubble surrounding you. You could hear Steve’s heartbeat beneath your ear as you laid on his bare chest, the strong beat lulling you into an almost trance. His arm reached down the length of your back, the tips of his fingers just brushing the swell of your ass. 

You were pleasantly sore and exhausted, your mind empty save for the buzz of happiness that you knew you would already crave more of. “Thank you.” You pressed a kiss into his pec.

“For what baby?” His voice was thick, exhaustion bleeding into his tone. 

“Being kind.” Your other hand slipped around his waist, keeping his body bound to yours. Steve chuckled, his lips pressing to the crown of your head.

“We really need to work on your standards.”

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[moni-logues]

Thirteen Rounds

Pairing: Boxer!Jungkook x f!reader

Genre: smut smut smut smut smut! sex ban smut lmao; established relationship

Summary: JK's boxing coach tells him he can't come for four weeks before his title fight. Ah, four weeks isn't that long, right? ... Right?

Word count: 13.2k

Content: oral sex (m. and f. receiving), unprotected sex, masturbation (f.), orgasm denial, multiple orgasms, overstimulation, sex toys, uh implied come eating? (It's not mentioned but he comes in her then eats her out sooooo it's happening 😂), cutesy nicknames that honestly even make me cringe these days lmaooo

A/N: as I said in a post earlier today, this hit 6k notes on the old blog and I know crowing about notes is tacky and no one cares (and even I don't care! That's not why I'm here!), but I never really got to celebrate this fic when I posted it and it took the fuck off. So here's to another 6k 🤪🤪🤪

FOUR WEEKS TO GO

Jungkook walks slowly, very slowly, down the corridor to the door of your apartment. He does not want to go through it. He really doesn’t want to have to tell you what he’s about to.

Four weeks no sex.

That’s what Coach said. No sex, no masturbation, orgasms 100% completely verboten. He knows this is not going to go down well with you. From the very start of your relationship, you have never gone that long without sex. Jungkook isn’t sure he’ll be able to make it; he’s not sure if you will be either. A tiny part of him worries what it might do to your relationship – you’re stronger than that, aren’t you? This won’t hurt your relationship, will it? You’ve been together for years now, four weeks without sex can’t change anything… Right? Jungkook knows in his heart of hearts that it’s right but the thought of four weeks without you is so unutterably awful that he also can’t believe it won’t change things.

He flops face-first onto the sofa next to you and squirms immediately as you rake a hand through his hair, scratching his scalp lightly. Absolutely none of that from now on.

“You ok?” you ask and he can’t answer because the answer is no and he’s not going to be for another four weeks, another 29 days in fact. He mumbles nothing into the sofa.

“Just tired? Training hard today?”

Training wasn’t hard, especially. This conversation we’re about to have is hard, Jungkook thinks. Keeping his face shoved into the sofa cushion, he breaks the news.

“Jungkook,” slight impatience in your voice now. “I cannot understand you when you talk into the sofa; what’s going on?”

He lifts his head slightly but can’t bring himself to look at you.

“Coach says we can’t have sex until the fight.”

“WHAT?”

“We can’t have sex until the fight,” he repeats, quietly, miserably.

He clenches and unclenches his fists by his side, still not daring to look at you.

“But that’s four weeks away! Four weeks!”

“I know!”

He takes your hand and kisses it, leaning up on his elbows. He rests his head on your thigh, bumping it gently as if he were hitting it against a brick wall. He mumbles under his breath, as close as he ever got to invective against his Coach (whom he nevertheless trusts and respects deeply). You’re being quieter than he expected you to be and it makes him nervous. He expected outraged protestations, reasoned arguments, begging and pleading. But you’re sitting and thinking.

“Why?” you ask. “What’s it for?”

“He says it’ll improve my focus, power, and aggression if I don’t come between now and then…”

You hum in response and he risks a peek at your face. You’re smirking and something about it makes his stomach drop.

“So… You can’t come, but I can do whatever I want, hm?”

He hadn’t considered that. Of course, that makes sense; you’re not wrong, but Jungkook realises this with absolute horror. Not being able to fuck you for four weeks was going to be bad enough as it is, but four weeks of getting you off without a single second of relief for him? He feels sick.

“Noooo! Baby, please. Please, you have to do this with me.”

It’s not his usual role, but he is not above begging. You shake your head.

“No way; four weeks is a long time and I’m not fighting anyone.”

“I know it’s a long time! That’s why we have to do it together!”

“On the contrary, my sweet, little biscuit, the whole point is that we don’t do it together, isn’t it?”

You lean down and kiss his nose but it is of no comfort. He’s pouting now, both furious and devastated at this turn of events. When you start running your hands through his hair again and his dick twitches, he groans; this will kill him, he thinks. Stone cold dead, this is going to kill him. He holds your hand tight and looks at you, finally, dead in the eye, eyes wide and pleading, his absolute best puppy dog.

“Please,” he begs. “Please.”

“Why don’t we have one last night?” you suggest and Jungkook groans because he knows that tone. “You can start tomorrow. One night won’t make a difference, surely?”

You slide down the sofa until your faces are almost level and Jungkook is about to rest his head where your thigh was, but discovers your breast in its place. He holds still. This is his first test and, while you might have a point, he’s got rules to follow and he can’t break now, not at the very first hurdle. He’s got better self-control than that, hasn’t he?

“Hm?” you continue. “Start tomorrow… Come on, Kookie, please.”

He wants to say yes, of course he does, but if he’s going to last four weeks, he’s going to have to practise saying no.

You slide off the sofa onto your knees on the floor and he eyes you carefully. You’re dangerous and you know it. When you trail your fingers down his spine and kiss the back of his neck, he shivers.

“I want you so badly,” you whisper in his ear and he groans. You slip your hand underneath his T-shirt and he’s sticky with sweat. “I didn’t have you yesterday and now we have to go four weeks? Kookie, I can’t take it… Be good to me, Jungkook, please.”

He loves it when you beg. Hearing his name in your mouth all high and whiny, tremulous with need and desire. If he wasn’t hard before, he is now. Goosebumps follow your hand on his back and he shivers, groaning into the sofa, fists clenched again.

“My love, stop it, please. We can’t.” His voice is weak and he can’t believe how weak he’s feeling; if you persist might longer, he genuinely feels he might snap and he’s ashamed that his self-control is apparently all but non-existent. He must do better.

“But I’m so wet already.”

Fuck. He snaps. He kneels up and looks at you, your innocent, little face, a devil in disguise. If you’re just playing with him, just teasing, you’re going to be in big trouble.

“Get up,” he commands, slapping the sofa. You obey without hesitation and he grabs you by the legs, pulling so you’re falling onto your back. He tells him yourself you were lying, of course you won’t be wet; you’re just teasing him and he’ll tell you off and ask you to take this seriously and it’ll all be fine. Then he yanks down your trousers and your underwear.

“FUCK.”

He brings his hands to his face and rubs.

“Fuck, I thought you were lying just to tease me, but fuck, you really are.”

You are. Looking at you is almost painful; he’s desperate to touch you. You’re right there in front of him, legs spread, and all he has to do is touch you. But he can’t. If he starts, he won’t be able to stop. He shuffles back away from you slightly, hands moving to reach you and then pulling back. He swears again.

When you spread your legs wider and shuffle yourself down closer to him, he has to stand. He has to do something with his hands: clenching at his sides, on his hips, on his head, over his face. He’s pacing, too, unable to look at you once again. It would be all too easy to take his own trousers off, let his dick out of its cloth prison and fuck you into the sofa. He has to bite down on his knuckles to stop himself doing just that.

“Kookie,” you coo. “Aren’t you going to touch me? I need you… No one touches me like you do.”

Jungkook is open-mouthed and he has to turn away. He growls, deep in his throat, and gently places his fists on the kitchen counter, when what he really wants to do is smash straight through it. His whole body is tense, fighting itself in an agony of indecision. He needs you to stop; he’s sure you won’t. Not when you’re having this effect on him. He should’ve seen it coming. He knew you wouldn’t take the news well; for some reason, he didn’t expect you to immediately be so defiant. You were always so pliant and obedient for him. But then, this isn’t really his rule and you and his coach didn’t exactly see eye-to-eye.

He freezes when he hears the unmistakeable squelch of you plunging your fingers in your wet heat. Then you moan. Then you whimper.

“Jungkook, please.”

He can barely control his breathing as he stands, still with his back to you, unable to block the sound of you from his ears. He should be the one drawing those moans from you; he should be the reason your breathing is hitched.

He decides quickly that you have a point. He can’t come but that doesn’t mean he can’t do anything he likes. He crosses the space to the sofa in three large steps and forces your hand away from you. He doesn’t see the expression on your face as you look up; he’s too busy staring at his next meal. He squeezes your thighs hard and lowers his mouth to you.

“Fuck, yes,” you breathe and it goes straight to his dick.

He moans loudly as he licks from your core to your clit, drinking you in. He licks through your folds, not wanting to miss a drop. He swirls his tongue around your clit before sealing his lips and sucking hard; you grab at his hair and he flicks his eyes to you but your head is tipped back, your back arching off the sofa. He pulls your thighs, bringing you even closer, smothering him, burying him but if he can’t breathe, he doesn’t notice. He notices the pitch of your whines tilt; he notices your breath come quicker; he notices your thighs twitching under his hands; he notices you tugging harder and harder at his hair. He watches you as he works, alternately swirling his tongue across your throbbing bundle of nerves and sucking, until you’re screaming, your body writhing, shuddering under the waves of your orgasm.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck,” he swears repeatedly, almost sure he hears you saying the same, but he can’t move his mouth from your lips; all that fresh arousal dripping from you has his name on it.

You squirm and bring your legs together, your feet pushing against his shoulders and he relents, shifting backwards but still gripping your thighs tight.

“I love you,” he says. “I love you, I love you but fuck, I fucking love your cunt.”

His hands move higher, his thumbs spreading your lips, running up and down, the slick noises they make like music to his ears. He whines as he drops his head to your thigh with a heavy sigh. He squeezes his eyes tight shut for a moment, trying not to lose all control even as his cock aches in his pants, desperate for you.

While he’s trying to keep it together, you extricate yourself from his grip and sink onto the floor. While he’s off-guard, you spread his legs and slot yourself between them. It’s only when his dick jumps as you slide your hands up his thighs that he realises what is happening. He leaps up and away from you in one, quick, fluid motion.

“No, no, no,” he mutters, hands tangling in his hair, twisting his T-shirt, gripping the kitchen counter, anything to stop them wandering to the bulge in his trousers. He’s painfully hard now, twitching with almost no provocation; his restraint is hanging by a thread.

“Jungkook,” you call for him, still kneeling on the floor. “Kookie, come here, let me help you.”

He growls and takes a deep breath. If he even looks at you right now, he knows he’ll snap.

“I’m going to shower.”

He has to get out, get away from you, anywhere will do.

“You better not wank in there!” you call after him. “Or I’m going to be really upset!”

He chuckles bitterly; as if he would ever choose his hand over your sweet mouth. He strips quickly and steps into the shower, turning the temperature as low as it’ll go and the power on full blast. He gasps as a strong stream of icy water hits him; he shudders and shivers and forces himself to stand still. He’s panting and his skin turns red under the blast but he can’t move, not until he’s flaccid, not until he’s stopped thinking about your beautiful pussy and your soft, hot mouth and no-! Enough of this. He calls to mind all his least favourite things, conjuring up the worst images he can, disgusting, horrible, anything. He just has to stop thinking about you.

When he’s finally showered and clean and soft, he leaves the bathroom. It’s not late, but you’re already sitting up in bed, naked as you always are, and he groans, trying to avoid looking at you.

“Hey now, that’s not fair,” you tell him, sulking with an exaggerated pout as he takes the towel from his waist and rubs it over his hair.

He almost chokes on his indignation.

“Not fair? Me not being fair? And what do you call that, out there? Is that fair, huh? And this?” He gestures to you, chest on display, arms just slightly squeezing your breasts together, as if you think he won’t be able to tell. “Is this fair?”

Swallowing hard and taking a deep breath, he sits next to you on the bed; he simply will not survive the next four weeks if he can’t get you on-side. He has to stop you reaching out to touch his cheek; he’s only just been able to lose his erection, he’s not sure he can manage another.

“I’m serious, y/n, I cannot do this.”

He’s not sure he can look at you anymore. The thought of spending a whole night next to your naked form, your soft skin pressed against him… He can’t. He can’t even think it without feeling a stir in his groin.

“I can’t do this. I’m going to sleep in the spare room.”

Never in his life has he been more grateful to have one. He’d sleep on the sofa or the floor if he had to, but, if he’s doing all this to improve his fighting, he needs to keep his sleep up, too.

“Jungkook! Don’t leave me!”

When he risks a look at you, you’re wide-eyed and open-mouthed, dismayed. He doesn’t ever want to be the cause of that face; his heart aches. Maybe this would affect your relationship after all. He returns to sit on the edge of the bed and takes your hand. He kisses your palm.

“I can’t- I… I can’t even look at you, right now, without wanting to jump you.” He says quietly, sadly. “I just-“

“I can put some clothes on?”

Your hopeful face squeezes his heart and he wishes that would be enough.

“No, baby, thank you but we both know that isn’t going to help. I know what’s under there.”

“So, we’re not even going to be able to sleep together for the next four weeks?”

“No, we will, I promise. I just… Right now, I just need to get away from you.”

He chuckles, trying to lighten the mood, but fails. He misses you already.

“Can I at least kiss you goodnight?”

Jungkook isn’t sure. He’s not sure the one thread of sanity he’s clinging to will last, but he has to give you something.

“Of course, you can,” he answers, with only a little hesitation. “But please… Be nice…”

You take his face in his hands and he shivers. You kiss him once, firmly, and then again, softly, sighing against his mouth. He wants to wrap his arms around you and kiss you again, wants to melt into your mouth and roll your tongue with his. Then he feels temptation in his groin and has to pull away.

“Night night, my little custard cream.”

“Night night, my love.”

He leaves, and shuts himself in the spare room, wondering just how on earth either of you will make it through the next 29 days.

THREE WEEKS TO GO

Jungkook isn’t home so you’re taking the opportunity for a little Me Time (courtesy of your favourite rabbit). It’s been a week since the last time you came (courtesy of Jungkook) and you’re on edge. You feel a little guilty for the way you behaved, but you’ve been good this week in penance, even though you’re already missing him terribly.

At night, when he wraps himself around you, his hard chest against your back, his strong arms holding you tight, you feel a steady pulse in your core. You want desperately to shift, just push your hips back a little, bring his hand to cup your breast, do something to address your need of him. It’s worse than usual because, of course, you always want most what you can’t have. Isn’t that a universal truth? Last night, you even wished he would go and sleep in the spare room again; having him so close to you, knowing that you can’t touch him like you wanted to was beginning to get unbearable.

Hence, Me Time.

Jungkook is out and not due back soon so you have plenty of time to take things slow. Or at least, that’s what you intend. You take a nice, long, hot bath; apply your favourite body lotion: a rich, thick, cocoa butter that makes you feel expensive; you potter around the apartment for a while in your sexiest lingerie – there’s no one to see you, but it makes you feel sexy anyway. You think about Jungkook. You think about his hair, too short for your preference at the moment; you like it a little longer, a little wavier, giving you plenty to grab onto at the nape of his neck just as at the crown; you like it when it flops into his face and he pushes it back; you like when he lets you plait it and style it, just for the two of you, just for fun.

You think about his beautiful, brown eyes: huge and wide, bright and shining, so open and innocent. You think about the way he looks at you sometimes, like you’re his entire world, like he’s looking at the most beautiful, peaceful sight he’s ever seen. You think about the way he looks at you at other times: like you’re prey; like he’s calculating exactly the right way to destroy you; his eyes dark, black, piercing; eyes that silently command and will be obeyed.

You think about his mouth: his soft, pink lips and two straight rows of perfect white teeth; you think about his mouth on yours, the unyielding pressure of his lip ring, the hard bite of his teeth on your bottom lip, his soft, wet tongue rolling against yours; his soft, wet tongue swirling around your nipple; his soft, wet tongue licking through your folds, flicking across your clit, his lips tight around you as he sucks. You think about his long fingers, their reach; his strong hands and how they direct and control you, pinning you down and lifting you up.

You think about his cock, the prettiest you’d ever seen (though you weren’t surprised, given the rest of him); in perfect proportion, neither too long nor too thick, a slight, gentle curve, smooth but for one thick vein running the length of it. It makes your mouth water just to think of it; your pussy throbs, missing it and you settle on the bed. You can feel the crotch of your underwear is already sticky and your heart is already thumping but you’re still telling yourself that you’re going to take this slowly, because you have plenty of time.

You discard your bra, teasing your nipples beneath it, twisting at the barbells that run through each of them, remembering the way Jungkook had reacted the first time he saw them, as if it were Christmas morning and they were a brand-new puppy and a skateboard. You slip a hand down behind the waistline of your knickers and exhale sharply as you spread your juices across your clit. You’re aching now, with desire, with frustration but you take deep breaths to calm yourself down. You let your fingers work slowly, gently, dipping down between your lips to your entrance, exploring your folds, teasing and tapping your clit. It was almost like stepping into a bath: enveloped in warmth as blood rushed to the surface of your skin, cocooned in pleasure as it radiates outwards from your core to the tips of your toes. Goosebumps spread as a shiver rushes down your spine.

Then you get out your rabbit and the lube and shuffle out of your underwear. You coat the toy with lube, wipe your hand against yourself and turn it on, letting it rest against you for a moment, cycling through the settings until you reach your favourite. You think, not for the first time, as you slip it inside you, smoothly, easily, how much you wish you had one of these moulded from Jungkook’s cock. He thought you were joking the first time you said it, but you weren’t then and aren’t now. You want to be able to have him inside you even when he wasn’t around – or at times like this when he is around but isn’t allowed inside you. Nothing compares to him and while this toy might get the job done, it will never be the same.

The little rabbit ears press intently against your clit as you angle it inside you and start to rock your hips, working out a long, soft moan. You tip your head back and close your eyes, focusing on the coiling pressure in your abdomen. You cycle to another setting – higher, faster, more insistent now – and whimper with every breath as your climax comes closer.

“God, I’ve missed that noise.”

You sit up with a jolt to see Jungkook at the bedroom door, eyes roving hungrily over your naked body.

“Jungkook,” you gasp. “What are you doing here? I thought you had plans.”

He shrugs.

“Changed ’em... Though I might be sorry I did.”

“I thought you were going to be out... But since you’re here...”

You beckon him to the bed as you switch off the toy. He clicks his tongue and shakes his head with a sigh as he approaches you on the bed. You’re surprised; you thought he would refuse, hold back, protest even a little. Maybe this would be easier than you thought.

He looks at the rabbit, appraising.

“How does it compare, baby?” he asks, his voice low, a smirk just ghosting over his lips.

“It doesn’t, Kookie.” You flop backwards onto the mattress again. “Nothing compares to you.”

“Let me help you.”

You sigh with relief, waiting to hear his trousers unzip or the shuffle of cloth as he undresses but it doesn’t come. Instead, you hear the quiet whirring of vibration as Jungkook turns the rabbit back on. He chooses a different setting – short, intense pulses – and slips the toy back inside you, pushing the ears hard into your clit, forcing a choked moan from your throat.

“Jungkook... Kookie, no. I want you.”

The look on his face is fierce but softens when he looks into your eyes. He kisses your temple and whispers in your ear.

“You know you can’t have me now, baby. Stop playing dirty.”

He takes a hand and pushes low on your stomach as he rocks the toy inside you and changes the setting: insistent, hard vibration that almost sets your teeth chattering.

“Fuck,” you whisper as your walls start to clench and all your muscles tighten and you’re whimpering, mewling, seconds from climax, your breath catching in your throat. You’re a band stretched to its limits and just as you’re about to snap, Jungkook pulls the toy from you and sits back on the bed, not touching you.

“Wh-.. I...”

You look at him, dazed and confused, as he stands up and takes the toy with him out of the room.

“Where are you going?” you call after him, your voice weak and strangled.

You’re itching with frustration and impatience and when he returns, only a minute later, you turn to him, outraged. He’s empty-handed and he sits on the edge of the bed next to you and tucks your hair behind your ear sweetly.

“What are you doing?” you ask, still breathless, heart still pounding in your chest.

He leans closer to you, resting on his forearm on your chest, lightly crushing you beneath his weight as he takes your hand in his and directs it to his crotch, where you can feel his dick, semi-hard under his trousers.

“I’m showing you how hard this is,” he whispers menacingly in your ear. “You’re still not playing fair, little miss.”

He stands and walks out of the room, looking back over his shoulder at you.

“If I don’t get to come, you don’t get to come!” he calls.

You give a little, angry shriek and throw a pillow at him, which misses by miles, and you storm out after him.

“I did not sign up for that!” you shout, giving him a shove.

He grins at you and raises his eyebrows.

“What’s mine is yours, baby.”

“No way! No way! You know the second you leave, I can just make myself come.”

“That’s true,” he admits as he checks his watch, “but I’m not leaving again tonight.”

Furious now, you move closer to him, your hands on his hips. You lick your lips and move a hand between you, palming his erection. His eyes flutter closed.

“Two can play at this game, Jeon,” you hiss, sliding your hand between his trousers and his boxers, running your finger up his turgid length.

“Don’t call me Jeon.”

“Isn’t it your name?”

He tips his head back and bites his lip as you finally breach his boxers, wrapping your fingers around him, squeezing lightly.

“You only call me Jeon when you’re pissed,” he chokes out.

“Yeah, I’m fucking pissed.”

His head tips forward again and he looks at you as you sink to your knees, pulling his clothes down with him. You see him swallow hard.

“Not sure you thought this through, did you?” you ask, swiping your tongue across his head, tasting the tang of his pre-cum. “Here you are, all hard and ready for me...”

You take a hand through your lips, sweeping up your arousal and spreading it on the head of his dick.

“And me all ready for you...”

You wrap your lips around him and take him until he hits your throat, looking up at him through your lashes, then you come up and pause, just holding him in your mouth, your tongue running back and forth across the underside. Jungkook grunts and his eyelids flutter closed. You can see his fists clenching on either of him.

“Y/n...” he groans, quiet and strangled.

“Mm?” you hum, not taking him from your mouth, and you notice the muscle in his jaw jump as he clenches. “You started this,” you remind him, as you trail sloppy, wet kisses down the length of his hot, smooth cock. “I was going to be nice to you, but you had to go and spoil it.” You run your tongue flat across his balls as your hand continues to pump his shaft and he moans.

“Fuck, I miss you,” he whines, his voice high and tight as you run your tongue back to his head, enveloping him in your mouth once again. “God, fuck.”

You hollow your cheeks and suck, your hand and mouth moving as one. Jungkook’s fist moves to your hair, gripping tight, not directing you, just to have something to hold on to. As you push lower, tipping your head to take him into your throat, he jerks.

“No, no, no, stop! Stop.”

He pushes you back by the shoulders and stands, his breathing ragged, looking up at the ceiling and blinking hard. You let him stand there, recovering; you stay kneeling at his feet.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” he says, each more aggressive than the last. He pulls his boxers and his trousers back on and looks at you, eyes wild. “No.”

“Kookie... Please.”

You pout up at him, put your hands on his thighs, and shuffle just an inch closer.

“No. Fuck, no, I can’t. I can’t.” He looks at you, alternately desperate and resolved and then shakes his head. “Baby, god, I want to. You know I want to. I’m sorry, I’m sorry.”

His hand is in your hair again, gently pulling you upwards, pulling you closer. He kisses your cheek and your lips, each little peck lasting a little longer than the last, until he just barely parts his mouth and you grab his bottom lip in your teeth. He moans and pulls away.

“No, no, no, no,” he whispers. “I can’t.” He swallows hard and looks skyward again, praying for strength. Then he repeats his no before stalking off into the spare room, cursing under his breath.

You sigh, more frustrated than ever, and, having spotted your stolen sex toy on the bathroom counter, you go back to finish what you started.

TWO WEEKS TO GO

Jungkook is sleeping in the spare room again. He says it’s because you’re not to be trusted, but what he means is that he isn’t to be trusted. He could barely trust himself around you before, but two weeks into the ban, he can’t risk taking any chances. Especially not with the way you’ve been behaving.

Apparently, so you tell him, there’s very little evidence to suggest that sex before a sporting event has as negative effect on performance.

“I even read,” you say, not for the first time, “that not having sex for a while lowers your testosterone so it’s not just that having sex isn’t bad, it might even be good! Don’t you want that?”

He’s trying to block you out. You’ve already told him this and he’s already told you that he’s doing as he’s told. He focuses on the TV, trying to get invested in the storyline, trying to care about the characters while you pester him relentlessly. He has to grit his teeth together and breathe carefully.

“Don’t ignore me, my little hobnob.”

You always pull out that biscuit when you think he needs to lighten up. He tries not to grin, not very successfully, because it’s such a ridiculous name – who calls a biscuit that, really? Then you slip your hands around his waist and rest your chin on his shoulder.

“I miss you,” you say, kissing his shoulder and rubbing his back.

He sighs, dropping his head, carefully trying to revel in your touch without giving in too far.

“I miss you too, love. Just two more weeks.”

You sigh, aggravated, and sit back.

“Yeah, two more weeks; we’re only halfway through. We have to do all of this all over again. Is that really what you want?”

“No, of course it’s not!”

Of course, he doesn’t want it. What he wants is to pin you down and eat you out ’til you’re screaming and then he wants to fuck you like his life depends on it, spend himself on you so hard he literally can’t move. What he wants is the opposite of this. Why can’t you understand that?

He turns to you, shifting his body around and reaches for your hands.

“Of course, it’s not what I want. I want you all the time. Why do you think I’m sleeping in the spare room again? I can barely stand sitting with you like this; every part of me is screaming at me to just take yo-“

“Then do it! Do it! I’m telling you, the science is on our side!”

He has to take a deep breath; he knows you may well be right. And he doesn’t like the thought of doing all this for no reason, for, if the article you read is right, the possibility that he’s actually less strong, less powerful in the ring, but he’s on a path and he has to stick to it.

“I’m doing what Coach says,” he tells you, sounding more resolved than he is. “I hired him for a reason and he’s already said he can notice a difference. This fight is so important and I have to follow him to the letter. I am sorry. I am…”

He is what?

He puffs out his cheeks and sighs. He doesn’t know what to say. There aren’t words for this or, if there are, he doesn’t know them. He leans forward and grabs the back of your head, pulling you in for a kiss. He knows he shouldn’t, knows how dangerous this is, but he misses you so much and he’s so upset and you’re so upset and he has to do something.

You scoot forward and sit yourself in his lap. His heart hammers in his chest, anxiety or desire or a heady mix of both, he’s not sure but his mind is slipping away from him and he’s not sure he cares anymore. He wraps his arms around you as his tongue finds yours. You’ve hardly had this much of each other over the last week and he’s ravenous. You moan into his mouth as he sucks on your tongue and he feels a stirring in his crotch. He can feel you, just above him, and he wants to push you down, roll your hips over his, but he daren’t; he doesn’t think he’ll be able to stop himself if you do.

He's breathless with the need of you and it catches in his throat as you grind into him. He moans and bites hard at your bottom lip; you keep going, kissing him hard so that he can’t speak.

Jungkook gathers up his strength and pulls back, holding you tight in place so you can’t chase after him. He’s breathing heavily and his hand trembles as he reaches up to tuck your hair behind your ear.

“Y/n…” He doesn’t know if it’s a plea or a warning; he doesn’t have any more words to follow. There isn’t anything he can say or do that will make this situation anything other than torture. Nothing will make you feel better than being fucked by him, fucked hard, nothing more and nothing less. He knows because he feels the same. He’s almost dizzy with desire; he’s giddy but clinging with desperation to the last remnants of his self-control. There’s a tiny voice at the back of his head proud of him for having come this far, but he can’t listen to it because we all know what comes before a fall and he can’t afford a fall like this.

It's the title. It’ll be his first title. This win will put him on the map. This win will establish him as a real, professional boxer, one to beat; this will be, he hopes, the first of many belts, many titles. His coach has real faith in him, he believes he can make it to world champion if he works hard enough. And Jungkook wants it. He wants to work; he wants to win. And now, he has to win. Losing is not an option. And once he has won, once this is over – in two, long, painful weeks – it’ll have all been worth it and he’ll be able to have you six ways from Sunday, every day of the week.

“Please don’t stop,” you whimper and the open, desperate pleading of your glistening eyes goes straight to his dick. “Please, please.”

He’s had to resist your pleading before; he’s even enjoyed resisting your cries and pleas, but that’s when he’s been in control; that’s when he’s been ramping up to wrecking you once, twice, three times, as many times as you can take. This is ramping up to nothing and your pleading only makes him feel broken.

You bring your face to his again and he can’t back away. You kiss him with urgency, running your hands over his body beneath his T-shirt, teasing his nipples until he’s fully hard, straining against his boxers, pressing against your crotch. You strip off your own top and Jungkook’s resolve crumbles. He dips his head, lifting you slightly from his lap to kiss your breasts, to flick his tongue over your nipples and swirl them in his mouth, one at a time, until they’re tight and hard. He bites hungrily and you mewl above him, whining his name. It’s like heaven to him and he can’t believe he hasn’t had this for two weeks; the two weeks stretching out in front of you are paling, forgotten in some faraway corner of his mind.

He's kidding himself that he can last a little longer with you lifted up like this, your hips no longer grinding your core into him. He keeps his mouth occupied at your chest and squeezes your glutes in his hands, then slipping them into the wide legs of your shorts. When he pulls your underwear to the side with one hand, and slips the fingers of his other hand into your warm, waiting slip, he sighs with satisfaction. You’re tight and soft and so, so wet.

You take his face in your hands and pull him back to your mouth. The kiss is all tongue and heavy breathing, messy and far from pretty but you’re each so desperate for the other that nothing else matters. You kiss his cheek and his jaw and bite down on his earlobe, whining breathily as he presses insistently against your front wall, each curl of his fingers bringing you closer to the edge. He slips his other hand behind your underwear and spreads your slick over your clit, rubbing insistently, knowing you’re getting close. He can tell by the sounds you’re making, sounds he’d work out of you every day of his life if he could.

“God, Kookie, baby, yes.”

You plant your lips on his neck, muffling your whines and whimpers as the heat builds inside you. Jungkook groans, shivering as you suck on his neck, as your cunt clenches his fingers tight, as your legs shake on either side of him. He doesn’t stop, can’t stop even when you’re tugging his hair, even when you’re squirming, even when you’re screaming his name. He’s far away now, lost in the bliss of your velvet heat. He’s insistent and you’re so sensitive that he pulls another orgasm from you with a cry and a shudder that takes your whole body. He’s so focused on you as a way of distracting himself from his own intense, aching desire. He’s painfully hard; he can feel the spreading circle of pre-cum on his boxers; he’s not entirely sure he won’t come even if you don’t touch him.

Then you flop against him, spent, and your hand grazes his crotch and he jerks violently.

“Fuck!” he gasps and tears prick in his eyes. He can’t look at you; he stares far away, out of the window, trying to stop his dick throbbing, trying to slow his heartrate, trying without success to calm himself.

“Kookie,” you whimper, your voice shaky. “Let me-“

“No,” he whispers, no strength in his voice, no strength anywhere in his body except his stiff, swollen cock. He closes his eyes and he can feel a tear trickle down his cheek, followed by your lips as you kiss it away. He flinches at the contact and whimpers when you stroke his hair.

“I can help you,” you whisper but he doesn’t hear you.

He’s lost, his mind strangled with desperate desire. His brain is whirring, swimming, floating away from him; his fingers tingle and shake and his heart thumps erratically in his chest. He’s never been this excruciatingly turned on before and knowing that he can’t see it through is heart-breaking.

You move your hand towards the waistband of his trousers and he grabs your wrist. He’s gripping so tightly, he’s sure it’ll hurt, but he can’t be gentle now.

“Don’t-,” he starts but his words are swallowed by a sob.

You press your forehead against his and he can’t stop the whimper as you kiss him, so light, so soft. He holds your face in his hands, barely even really touching, trying not to tangle them in your hair and pull you closer. You stay like that, just looking at each other for a minute or more, his eyes never leaving yours. He knows he needs to calm down, knows he should be calming down now that you’re still but his breathing doesn’t settle and he can hear the thump of his heart and the roar of his blood in his ears.

“Baby,” he says eventually, his voice croaky and hoarse. He has to do something and it has to be something drastic. He needs a shock to the system, a full reset. “I need-… I need you to get something for me.” And he needs you to get it because he’s not sure he can walk, not sure he can move at all.

“Anything.”

“Ice. And water.”

“Huh?”

“Ice and water; I need a big, big glass- a jug of iced water please.” His voice wobbles at the end and he’s trying so hard to regulate his breathing, trying so hard not to feel the pulsing in his underwear.

“Ok…”

You shift on his lap but he can’t let you go. His fingers twine in your hair and you have to pry them out to allow you to get up.

With the relief of you off him, the air around him clears and he jumps up, taking off his T-shirt and pushing his trousers to the floor. Once again needing to do something with his hands while he waits for you, he holds them out to the side, not daring to let them anywhere near his erection, fists clenching and unclenching. He feels like he might really be on the edge of a heart attack or an aneurysm. He feels abnormal, like nothing he’s ever felt before. He could keel over.

He can hear you, the ice clinking in the glass and he taps his feet, impatient. When you hand it over, he takes it with both hands and up-ends it all over himself.

“Jungkook!” you cry, as water splashes all over the floor and the sofa and the coffee table, but it sounds distant, the shock of the water temporarily sending him far away. He’s gasping and shivering and blinking hard, then screwing his eyes tight.

“I need you to go,” he tell you, still unable to look at you.

“Go where?”

“Anywhere, baby, literally anywhere,” his voice is still wobbling, his teeth chattering. “If we’re still in the same room in five seconds, I think I’m going to die. Come or die, either way, I don’t know but please, please just go.”

“Ok, I’m going, I’m going.”

He can barely hear you; he scrubs his hands over his face, swearing over and over and over again, begging the universe to let him calm down, to make these next two weeks go as quickly as they possibly can.

ONE WEEK TO GO

Jungkook hasn’t taken any more risks since that night. And he has also told you, almost every day since, to behave yourself, to stop doing that; he’s asked if you’re trying to kill him and the truth is: yes. You’re sick of it now; it takes almost nothing to get you hot: just the thought of him, randomly popping into your head as you’re trying to send emails at work, and you’re getting wet. You can’t sleep anymore. He’s still in the spare room but you lie in your bed, thinking about him lying in the other bed, and you can’t help yourself. You make yourself come again and again but it’s never enough. You can’t believe that he’s not only managed to ruin all other men for you but also your own damn self. You know how to push all your buttons but it’s not the same when it’s you doing it, it's not the same without Jungkook between your thighs.

You know there’s only a week to go, but it’s too long and you’re too frustrated and you’re reaching your boiling point. So, you do what any other sane person would do: naked protest. You stop wearing clothes in the house entirely, getting dressed only to go out and stripping as soon as the front door shuts behind you. When you first walk into the kitchen as Jungkook is eating breakfast, he chokes on his cereal and you have to slap him on the back; you feel his eyes following you as you make yourself a cup of tea and some porridge.

Now he’s just ignoring you. He’s doing his best to stay out of any room you are in, but that’s fine. It’s a small apartment and you’ve hidden his noise-cancelling headphones, so you know he can hear you when you moan and whine, wanton and gratuitous, as you do your best to fix your frustration.

He still hasn’t broken. You’re impressed, honestly. You didn’t think that he would be able to hold out this long and, as aggravated as you are, as deeply, unutterably frustrated as you are, you can’t help but admire his self-control. Unable to be in the same room as you, he texts you and tells you that his trainer is impressed with his performance and is confident about the fight; he believes he can win. He had fucking better win is what you think, but you text back something a little more supportive.

Six days before the fight and Jungkook is in the shower. You’re at a loose end, so you decide to join him. You thank the lord that he didn’t lock the door; he’s got his back to you and doesn’t notice you there until your hands are on his waist. He cries out in surprise and goes to turn around but you hold him still, kissing his shoulder and his back and the nape of his neck. You run your hands up his abs, grab his fulsome pecs, and peeking around his shoulder, you’re delighted to see he’s already hard.

“Were you about to masturbate in this shower?” you ask him, only half-serious.

“No,” he groans. “This is how badly I want you, y/n. Why are you making this so hard?”

You giggle at his choice of words and he growls deep in his throat. He turns around and cages you in against the screen with his hands either side of you.

“In six days,” he tells you, his voice low, face serious, eyes pinning you to the spot. “In six days, I am going to fucking destroy you. I’m going to fuck you so hard you can’t walk straight for a week; I’m going to fill you up so completely, my cum never stops dripping out of you; I’m going to make you scream so loud, our neighbours want to call the police; I’m going to fuck you and fuck you and fuck you again, then I’m going to fuck you some more and I’m still not going to be done. I’m going to take this cock,” he says, grabbing it at the base and hissing hard through his teeth as he does, “and I’m going to wreck your pretty little throat and your pretty little pussy, is that what you want?”

You can only nod, mute with desire, as you can feel arousal drip down your legs and you shiver, despite the warm, steamy atmosphere. Jungkook nudges his nose against yours, eyes still black as pitch, and he whispers in your ear.

“In six days.”

Then he leans back and stands back under the stream of water.

“Now get the fuck out.”

You’re so overwhelmed, you just do as he says and he follows behind you, shutting the door – and locking it – as soon as you’ve crossed the threshold. You blink hard and, as you come to your senses, you feel too many things at once: hot, frustrated, desperate, livid, heartbroken, a little bit intimidated, a lot excited, and over and above everything else, impatient.

Jungkook stands in the shower, turning the water icy again. He’s shaking, trembling all over, and before he can get himself under control, he’s sobbing. Hands against the tiles, shivering with cold and shuddering through ragged breaths, he drops his head and cries. Cries because he’s so frustrated, because he misses you so much, because he’s so tired, because he hates disappointing you, because he’s anxious, because he’s not sleeping well at night without you, because a tiny, paranoid thought niggles at him that this is going to make you leave him, because he can’t live without you and if he didn’t know it before, he knows it now.

He cries under the cold water for so long that it stops feeling cold against his skin and when he finally steps out of the shower, his skin is livid red and icy to the touch.

He goes to stay at a friend’s house that night.

“Look, I love you so much and I miss you so much that I can’t be around you,” reads his text. “Just thinking about you makes me want to die a seriously Little Death. The fight will be over soon; just six more days and I promise, I’ll give you everything you want and more. I love you, I love you, I love you. Please, please, please wait for me.”

“I love you, too, my little Bourbon,” you reply. “But I might never forgive you for this.”

“I promise, I’ll make you forgive AND forget, just wait ’til Saturday.”

He stares at his phone, wishing the messages said something different. He knows you’re joking, thinks you’re joking, hopes you’re joking, at least a little bit.

He sends a string of different kiss emojis and you toss your phone down beside you. Considering your small arsenal of sex toys without hope, you pick one at random, knowing even before you’ve started that it’s not even going to touch the sides of your desire. Your need for Jungkook has become a yawning chasm that stretches further than the eye can see; and it is a need for Jungkook specifically. For one mad moment a few days ago, you had considered the possibility of going out and getting fucked by someone else, but the second you thought it, it repulsed you: you don’t need a dick, you need his dick; you need his mouth; you need his hands. You need him, no one and nothing else. Accept no imitations. Which is really rather a pain right now.

You try to focus on your body, on the pleasure building there, the pleasant thrum in your core as you work with the vibrator in your folds and against your clit. You try to think about nothing, removing Jungkook from the equation, just emptying your mind and focusing on the physical sensations of your body.

It doesn’t work and you get so frustrated that you throw the vibrator in the bin and then, that not being enough, scoop up the others and chuck them in there, too. What’s the point of them, you think to yourself bitterly.

These had better be the fastest six days of your life or you aren’t sure you’ll survive.

FIGHT NIGHT

It was finally here. Jungkook had been working towards this for months, years, for his whole life in a way. It was both the pinnacle of his career and the first step of what he hoped would be a very long journey to the top. The final fight in his bid to be The Ring’s Super Middleweight champion: his opponent, Saul ‘Canelo’ Alvarez. Jungkook has him on reach and height, and he’s also lighter, which he thinks will be to his advantage. Canelo might be a slugger, but that’s where Jungkook excels. People think that his lightness is a disadvantage, that he doesn’t have the strength to throw hard enough punches, that he’s weak, that he’s Amir Khan. But he’s better than that. He’s agile and yes, slighter than other super middleweights, but he’s also strong and he’s also powerful and there’s nothing like seeing the surprise in his opponent’s face when he got his first punch in and they realised that for themselves. Of course, now he’s getting better known, he’s losing that element of surprise but it’s hardly the only thing he’s got in his keep.

But he’s not thinking about that. Today, just like all the other days this week, he’s thinking about you. His coach keeps telling him that he’s strong, that he seems focused, that he seems strong, but Jungkook isn’t entirely convinced. All he can think about is you; his mind is already beyond the fight and he’s anxious that this is going to be his undoing, that he’s going to have survived these past four weeks only to be so keyed up and desperate in the ring that he loses.

He wishes he could see you, just for five minutes, but you’ve been banned from his presence on fight days. You’re also banned from the gym on training days. Jungkook agrees with Coach that that’s probably for the best but it doesn’t mean he likes it. You are a distraction, there’s no denying it, but today, he really feels like he needs it. He needs you. Even an ounce, even a drop of you will do.

He pulls out his phone and dials your number.

“Kookie! Are you ok?” You sound concerned.

“Yeah, I’m fine, why wouldn’t I be?”

“We never speak on fight days; I thought something might be wrong.”

Jungkook sighs and leans his head back against the wall.

“Something is wrong: I miss you.”

“Jungkook! Don’t scare me like that!”

He laughs and knows he was right to call you; just hearing your voice is like a balm to his fraying nerves. He already feels more relaxed.

“I’m sorry, love,” he replies. “I just wanted to hear your voice; we haven’t spoken this week.”

“I know and whose fault is that?”

“I know, I know, it’s mine, but I can’t wait to see you. Even if I lose this fight, as long as I’ve got you, I’m good, I’m a winner.”

“Hey now, you’re not going to lose, my little oat and raisin cook-”

“You don’t like that flavour cookie, do you?”

“Well, I don’t, no, but I thought I’d go with the least sexy flavour, in respect of how easy it is to get a ‘rise’ out of you at the moment.”

He snorts, appreciative of the weird, little effort.

“I think you’re right: raisins are not sexy but cookies are sexy biscuits, aren’t they? By default? Sexier than normal biscuits, right?”

“So you’re saying we need a raisin biscuit that isn’t a cookie.”

“Yeah.

“Garibaldi?”

Jungkook laughs.

“I don’t even know what that is, love, but sure, it doesn’t sound sexy.”

“Ok, then, I know you’re not going to lose, my little garibaldi.”

He laughs again and tells you that his coach has said the same thing (“… not in the same words”). He wishes he could stay on the phone with you longer; having barely spoken to you this week, he misses your voice, your presence, your conversation, just as much if not more than he misses your body. He sees his coach crossing the room, approaching him and he rings off reluctantly, but relieved he got even a minute with you before tonight.

He’s pacing in the dressing room; it’s almost time. He considered asking you not to come to this one; he’s not sure that he’ll be able to focus knowing you’re so much as in the room. The usual rule is that you’re allowed to attend but you have to sit somewhere in the back, somewhere he won’t be able to see you; he’s not sure if that’ll be enough tonight. Coach is talking to him, trying to hype him up, but he can’t hear a word. He just knows he needs to end this fight as soon as he possibly can and that means not going out there all guns blazing like a reckless thug in a bar fight; it means taking a step back (and he physically does it, takes one step back), taking a deep breath, and remembering the strategy, remembering the training. He’s ready for this (“You’re ready for this, JK,” Coach cries); he’s going to destroy Canelo (“You’re going to smash it, mate; you’re going to destroy him!”); and then he’s going to destroy you and himself in that order.

Canelo seems thrown off by Jungkook at the start: his size, maybe, his strength, his Southpaw stance despite being right-handed, Jungkook can’t be sure, but he wins the first round decisively and it’s exactly how he needs it to go: he likes to be the underdog but he likes an early lead. Spite and competitiveness can get you surprisingly far in life. He was right that Canelo is heavy and Jungkook is able to run rings around him; he thinks he might genuinely be able to get this wrapped up early, if he can just manage to hit him hard enough.

That turns out to be an ambitious goal and, halfway through, he’s slightly down on points. He’s frustrated; he can’t quite work out why his punches aren’t landing. Are they really not connecting? It certainly doesn’t feel like it. Are the judges just not seeing them? He’s not sure what he can do about that. He spits out the water Coach squirted in his mouth and he’s nodding at his advice. As he stands to get ready for the seventh round, his eyes roam the crowd, not looking for anything, just looking. Then his stomach flips. He sees you.

You’re sitting in your seat, anxious and uncomfortable. It always makes you anxious to see him fight, even though you know he’s trained for this and he’s as safe as anyone else would be in the same situation, but you flinch every time Canelo lands a punch. Jungkook hasn’t lost a fight all year and you’re surprised to see him losing – even if not by many points. You hadn’t really considered the possibility of him losing, because he doesn’t. He’s Jungkook. He’s the Baby Assassin of Busan. He doesn’t lose.

But things go from bad to worse. The next rounds see Jungkook falter, making uncharacteristic mistakes and misjudgements that cost him points. As the bell rings at the end of the tenth round, you can see the frustration in Jungkook’s face from here. Your stomach twists; you know how much this fight means to him and how upset he’ll be if he loses. You try to rouse yourself; it’s not over ’til it’s over. There are two rounds to go and he’s not so far behind he can’t make it up. There’s still a chance.

When Jungkook stands for the eleventh round, you see him scanning the crowd in your direction. You panic, should you hide? Duck? Cover your face? Too late; his eyes find yours and the second stretches into eternity, just you and him, before he’s tapped by the ref and he turns away. You shouldn’t have come. You’re a distraction. You’re going to make it worse.

Jungkook is going to lose.

The bell rings and Jungkook feels sprightly, buoyed, suddenly less tired than he had done in the last round. He dances energetically around the ring, keeping Canelo moving, keeping him throwing punches and missing, throwing more punches and missing again and again. You’re on the edge of your seat; this is the Jungkook you know. All at once, he lands three punches on Canelo and leaps back out of his retaliatory reach. Then he settles in a bit closer and lets Canelo land a couple on him; this… isn’t the Jungkook you know. You can’t work out what he’s doing; you’ve not seen him do this before. You turn to the clock, watching the seconds of the round tick by. Thirty seconds left. You check the points. Jungkook still behind.

This is more like it, Jungkook thinks. He can end it. He knows he can. He just has to let Canelo let his guard down a little more, tire him out a little further. Jungkook is not letting this get to twelve rounds. It won’t happen. Not on his watch.

You’re so focused on the screen: the points, the time, that you miss what causes the crowd to suddenly surge and scream. Canelo is standing with the referee in front of him, looking a little dazed. The ref lets them continue and the round commences again. Before Canelo has even blinked, Jungkook has hit him with a left hook that you know he put all his weight into. Canelo falls to the mat and doesn’t get back up. The ref starts counting. The crowd count with him.

“8… 9… 10!”

The ref waves a wide cross in front of him; the commentator declares it a knockout; and the crowd is screaming. Jungkook’s arms are in the air, his coach lumbering into the ring to envelope him in a hug, along with everyone else, it seems, the ring suddenly full of people. You lose sight of Jungkook. You’re on your feet, straining to see over the heads of the people in front of you, who are doing the very same thing. Tiny red fists emerge from the mêlée and it’s him; you exhale a breath you hadn’t realised you were holding. You’re desperate to get to him. It’s over. The fight’s finally over. And he won. By knockout after a hard fight. This is absolutely the best outcome, better even than you’d hoped for. You bet he’s on cloud nine and you can’t wait to join him there.

Jungkook is buzzing. He’s done it. It’s finally over. And that means there’s only one thing on his mind. He can’t focus, is barely there as they hand him his belt, as he lifts it above his head to show the screaming crowd. People are congratulating him, slapping his back, rubbing his hair; at some point, someone takes his hands and rips off his gloves – he’s not sure where they end up. The fight was televised and a man with a microphone approaches him. He tries hard to focus on the questions, answering as quickly as he can and then the presenter asks just what he’s going to do now he’s won his first Super Middleweight title.

“Well,” he answers, “I haven’t come in four weeks so I’m going to go find my girl and fuck her in the dressing room ’til neither of us can walk straight!”

He points right at you, flicks a peace sign to the crowd and jogs back the way he entered 45 long minutes ago.

He keeps jogging all the way to the dressing room, stopping for precisely nobody. Coach tries to grab his attention, tries to grab his shoulder, but he shrugs him off. Wild horses can’t keep him from you now.

He swings open the dressing room, for a moment disappointed that you’re not there before him, but, of course you wouldn’t be. He’ll have to wait; it’s been four weeks, he can cope with another four minutes. Probably. He paces back and forth, back and forth; he chugs half a bottle of water; he almost wipes the sweat off his body, dries his hair, but then he remembers how much you like him dirty like this. Just the thought of you has got him hard already. He palms himself through his shorts and immediately has to stop himself; to come before you’ve even got in the door is unthinkable, unforgivable.

The door opens and there you are.

“Fucking finally.”

Jungkook slams his hands either side of your head, leaning down over you, sweat still dripping from his hair. He lowers one hand slowly to lock the door, his dark eyes never leaving yours, and then returns it next to your head.

“Did you have to wear fucking jeans?” he asks, laughing lightly. Of course, she’d wear jeans, he thinks, fucking tease. “Couldn’t find a dress? A skirt?”

“Sorry,” you answer, and you’re already breathless.

Jungkook kisses you, pressing his whole body against you and you sigh; god how you’ve missed this. He turns you around with one knock of his hand on your hip and he unbuttons your jeans impatiently. He shoves them roughly down your legs and you step out of them and your shoes at the same time.

“Oh baby, I don’t care. All I care about is finally getting to fuck you like you deserve. Please tell me you’re wet already. I don’t think I can wait a second longer.”

He’s usually more considerate; he would usually take his time. But this is not a usual situation. You laugh.

“Kookie, I’ve been wet for weeks, just hurry the fuck up, would you?”

He doesn’t need telling twice. He strips off his shorts and boxers and as he presses the head of his cock against your entrance, and it twitches, he gasps.

“Shit.”

He takes a few breaths, tries to steady himself. He kisses your neck, buying himself some time. He’s on a hair trigger and he’s not entirely convinced he won’t blow his load in one thrust.

“Just so you know,” he tells you, figuring there’s nothing else for it. “I’m going to last about ten seconds right now, but I promise, I’ll be ready to go again. I swear this won’t be it.”

“Just fuck me, please, Kookie. I’ll take ten seconds over none.”

Your whole body shudders as he presses into you for the first time in four weeks. You both moan low and Jungkook pauses at the bottom. You can feel him breathing heavily against your skin and he takes your trapezius in his teeth, taking a generous bite and not letting go as he drags himself backwards before thrusting in again. Your walls are spasming already; you’re so tight and he’s stretching you just right, filling you up like you’ve not been filled for 29 long days.

Ten seconds, as it happens, was an over-estimation. The way you grip him, the way he can feel your walls fluttering against him; you’re so hot and wet and tight and it’s been so long and he’s so sensitive. He lasts for all of a handful of thrusts before he’s groaning and shooting hot, white ropes of cum into you.

“Fuck, shit, sorry, baby, fuck!”

You can’t help but laugh as you turn around, keeping your legs tight together. He grins sheepishly at you and runs a hand through his sweaty hair.

“I’m sorry, love, I did tell you.” He rests his forehead against yours. “I’ve missed you so much.”

His hands meet across your lower back and he pulls you close for a kiss.

“I’ve missed you, too, Kookie,” you mumble against his lips, half your words eaten up by Jungkook’s mouth. You feel his tongue against your lower lip and you open up for him, sliding your tongue over his as he licks into your mouth. God, even this you’ve missed. You’ve barely even seen him in the last week, let alone got close to him, let alone touched him, let alone kissed him, even chastely. It’s overwhelming now to have him so close to you, all over you. You never want him any further away.

He moves his hands lower and lifts you up under your bum, carrying you to the sofa, where he strips you of your top and bralet – the black, lacy one you know he likes. You almost pout that he takes no notice of it but he catches you eye and grins.

“I notice, I know, I love you, thank you, but god, I don’t want a stitch on you right now. Nothing is better than you like this.” He stretches his hands out over your naked body and climbs over you. He ducks again, swallowing your next moan as he pinches at your nipple.

His mouth is everywhere, burning wherever it touches. You’re sweating and breathless and you think you won’t last much longer than ten seconds either when he finally touches you. Your cunt is quivering in anticipation, your clit throbbing a hard pulse, its echoes shuddering through you. Your back arches as Jungkook moves lower, his mouth on one nipple and then the next and then lower and lower still. He crawls off the sofa onto his knees and pulls you around, legs dangling from the edge. He spreads your thighs wide and takes a moment, looking down at your soaking wet pussy through half-lidded eyes. He licks his lips and clicks his neck from one side to the next before fixing you with a mischievous grin.

“If you even think about teasing me,” you gasp out. “I will fucking murder you.”

He laughs and kisses your inner thigh.

“You over-estimate my self-control, my love. I’m at my fucking limit.”

He is. He isn’t even close to finished with you. His cock is already stirring again as he dives straight in, licking a broad stripe from core to clit and moaning lasciviously as he does. You’re already so sensitive, whining and whimpering as he sucks and slurps at you, his face buried so far into the crux of your thighs, you don’t know if he can breathe. Almost immediately, you’re cresting, arching off the sofa, thighs clamping together on Jungkook’s head as a streak of hot pleasure surges through you and fresh arousal gushes over his face.

He brings his hands to your thighs and forces them apart without breaking contact with your cunt. He doesn’t stop, no matter how you squirm; you can’t catch your breath to tell him you’re over-stimulated, to beg him to stop, to give you a second’s break. A scream breaks in your throat as he pushes three fingers inside you and you’re seeing stars. He finally takes his mouth from you and breathes heavily against you, his breath sending sprinkles of goosebumps across your skin. He curls his fingers inside you and then tips your hips just slightly, suddenly hitting the perfect spot. You’re incoherent, animal, as you moan and whimper, stuttering to another orgasm under his ministrations.

You don’t have to find a way to ask him to remove his fingers as the waves of your orgasm roll through you but just as you are about to breathe a sigh of relief, his mouth is back on you. He’s gentle this time, more patient. He kisses your lips, licks through your folds slowly, moaning, his brows knitting together because it’s been so long since he’s tasted you and there’s nothing he’d ever rather eat. He buries his tongue in your hole, bumping your clit with his nose; if it were anyone else, it might be accidental, but you know Jungkook knows your body perfectly and knows exactly what he's doing. You’re raw, over-wrought, dehydrated. Your vision swims and your voice gets stuck in your throat, able only to gasp and stutter, not even able to scream his name out loud as you scream it in your head. Your hands tremble, one pushing back the hair on your head, the other finding its way to Jungkook’s hair, tangling there as if you could even dream of giving him direction right now.

His eyes flick to yours and they’re black, pupils dilated, lids fluttering quickly to a close again as he moans, vibrating lips sealing around your screamingly sensitive clit. Your hand pulls sharply at his hair, but he doesn’t even seem to notice. You feel like every atom in your body has been electrified, every touch, every movement – yours or his – sending sparks straight to your core, where they’re churned up into a tight ball. Like the death of a star, your body collapses in on itself, contracting and tightening as you are reduced to little more than a silent scream, and then explodes, a supernova of ecstasy exploding within you, scattering bits of you all over the room.

When you open your eyes, you can see stars wherever you look, which isn’t far because you can’t find it within you to move a single muscle.

“You ok, my love?”

Jungkook’s face swims into view, a dopey grin on his sticky, wet face. He looks drunk or high or both. He pushes the hair off your face, your flushed cheeks, fucked-out, dilated pupils staring straight at him; he thinks you look high or drunk or both. He kisses you so you can taste yourself on his lips and you’re suddenly hungry again.

“Kookie.” Your voice is hoarse and low, still strangled with need.

Jungkook hums against your mouth as he lifts you up, pressing your back into the back of the sofa.

“Kookie.”

You manage to grab his face between your palms and hold him still, giving you a chance to focus on him, see him properly.

“Tell me what you need,” he says, as eager to please and energetic as a new puppy and you have no idea how. He should be tired; he knows he’s going to crash hard, but right now, there’s adrenaline surging through him like there’s no tomorrow. He’s wired; he’s excited; he feels almost manic with love and lust and he’s so high, he can’t see the ground. He feels like he could go all night and he’s certainly going to try.

“I need you inside me, right now, right this second. Please, please, please.”

You aren’t exactly unaccustomed to begging but nothing will stop the stream of ‘please’s tumbling from your mouth. Nothing, that is, except the head of Jungkook’s perfect cock in your folds, waiting, teasing at your entrance.

He’s lifted you again, setting you on the arm of the sofa, him kneeling on the cushions; with nothing to rest against, you cling to him tight as your breath catches in your throat. He watches closely as he pushes into the tight, wet slip of your cunt, watching himself disappear into you. You want to make a joke about lasting another ten seconds but you don’t have the energy, the capacity, the mental agility to make it; you just about manage to cry his name as starts to thrust, smooth and slow at first, but soon, quicker, harder, accompanied by quiet growls and grunts as he grips you tight. You really do feel drunk, giddy, hysterical as he’s finally, finally back where he belongs. You feel tears prick in your eyes at the relief of it, the pressure, the pleasure.

“God, I’ve missed you,” he whispers. “Shit, I can’t wait to fill you up, stuff you fucking full. Can you take it, baby?”

He’s relieved he hasn’t come again already, though he knows he could. He’s holding back because he’s still so close to the edge. If he isn’t careful, he’s going to lose it again.

“I can take it,” you reply, voice high and tight. “Give it to me, Kookie- fuck.”

He grabs the hair at the back of your head and pulls it back, exposing your neck so he can kiss you, lick you, bite you there, moaning against your skin as you whimper and stutter.

“Kookie, shit, please. I need you to fuck me forever. God, don’t stop. Don’t stop.”

“Never,” he grunts. “Shit, won’t stop. I’m yours, baby.”

“Only mine.”

“Only yours.”

You press your lips to his clavicle, then lick a bead of sweat travelling down his throat. Jungkook moves faster still, his grip on you painfully tight as he threatens your cervix with every thrust. You’re so sensitive, you’re at an almost constant spasm around him; your limbs still heavy and weak, tingling like they’re both going numb and coming back to life. You simultaneously want this to last forever and feel like you’ll die if a single extra ounce of pleasure is put on you. Then Jungkook sucks at that one spot on your neck that makes you melt and you swear, voice wavering and breaking.

“Give me one more, baby,” he demands, so low you almost don’t hear it.

“I don’t have it,” you whimper.

“Yes, you do, c’mon, y/n.”

And he slips a hand between you, never letting his pace falter.

“Jesus, fuck!”

He touches you gently, but it’s enough to have reality slipping from view, your vision burning white, your blood roaring, screaming in your ears as you cum again. You hold him tight, your nails digging into his back, your teeth hard on the delicate flesh of his neck. It rolls through you, knocking your breath from your lungs, and once it’s passed, you’re trembling, shaking.

Jungkook is holding his breath, straining to last to fuck you through your orgasm; you’re so tight around him it’s like his brain loses signal, just a siren wailing an emergency. No thoughts, no words, when you collapse against him, he exhales, and releases into you with a long, high-pitched sigh.

He lies back onto the sofa, taking you with him.

“That was more than ten seconds, right?” he asks, breathless.

You laugh and pat his shoulder.

“Well done, little jammy dodger; I’m proud of you.”

“For lasting more than ten seconds or winning the title?”

“What title?”

The question leaves your lips before your brain has engaged and Jungkook laughs, first a little and then a lot, so much that you can’t help but laugh with him, can’t help but laugh until you’re crying, your abs hurting, you’re silent in your mirth, breathless and voiceless and hysterical.

When you finally stop, you bring your face level to his. He still has tears of laughter in his eyes and streaking his cheeks. You wipe them away with your thumb and he turns his head to kiss your palm.

“Both, I guess?” you answer.

He grins and shakes his head.

“I almost lost. I thought I was going to fucking lose,” he tells you. “That second half, I-…”

“What happened?”

“I saw you. I saw you in the crowd and I almost fucking came right then and there.” He laughs, though it was anything but funny at the time. “I couldn’t concentrate on the fight; all I could think about was trying not to get a fucking boner. Shit what a stupid fucking idea it was not having sex for four we-”

“I fucking told you!”

“I know, I know. I will never not listen to you ever again for the rest of my life, I swear. God.”

“No more sex bans?”

“No more sex bans. I am never, ever not having sex with you again.”

“Good.”

You lift yourself onto your elbows on his chest and kiss him first on the lips, then the jaw and neck and anywhere within reach.

“Speaking of never not having sex… Are you ready to go again?”

[freelancearsonist]

Whole

Steve Harrington x fem!Reader

Rated MA for the most long-winded poetic smut i've ever written jfc 🤦‍♀️ slow burn fluff with a couple sprinkles of angst for flavor, reader uses fem pronouns and is described as having female parts, it's dirty y'all but at least they use protection

7,470 Words

A/N: you all know my mo by now i disappear for a year and then come back and lay down some god damned PORN. this fic is no exception to the rule. @shakespeareanwannabe requested this back in july and she literally just asked for a cute moment between steve and dustin, sorry you got 6k words more than you bargained for 😂 but also thank you for betaing and the constant validation you're the best ily 🖤

Steve’s not sure how it even worked.

He can still remember the look on Robin’s face when you agreed, how she was speechless for almost ten minutes because she couldn’t process what had just happened.

Steve’s reaction was about the same as hers, in all honesty. He’s gotten so used to striking out that asking people out has become something of a game to him. He knows he’ll get a no, and he knows Robin will laugh her ass off at him. But what can he say? He likes putting a smile on his best friend’s face.

Needless to say, you’ve shaken him. In the best possible way. Because your answer was three letters instead of two.

And now, he's a little bit in over his head.

Or, to be more accurate, a lot in over his head.

It seems like it’s been ages since he’s gone on a date, even though it’s only been a few months at most. He feels lost, like he’s completely unlearned everything he ever knew about girls.

He hates it, despises it with every fiber of his own being, but he also knows it’s true; he needs advice. And although he’ll never admit it to the little shithead’s face, there’s no one better he can think of going to than his very own protege. Who better to remind him of his own prowess than the person who learned everything they know from him?

One look at Dustin’s smug little face and Steve almost regrets it. Almost.

“Just can’t stay away, can you?”

“Yeah, yeah.” Steve rolls his eyes and gives the younger boy a little shove, camouflaging it with an affectionate pat on the back. “This is strictly business, Henderson.”

“Oh, is it now?” The younger boy’s voice takes on a smug tone as he folds his fingers together and leans back in his chair. “Well then, why don’t you have a seat? Step into my office.”

Steve rolls his eyes and slides into the booth, shooting a smile and a “thank you” to the kind waitress who delivers two milkshakes to their table.

Dustin takes his time and makes a meal of unwrapping his straw, feeding off of Steve’s clear impatience Steve’s fingers tap against the table, reminding himself that patience is necessary when you come to someone for a favor. It’s just that it’s Dustin, and Dustin knows exactly how to get under the older boy’s skin in the most annoying-yet-oddly-endearing fashion.

“So…” Dustin finally says after a lengthy sip of strawberry milkshake. “What brings you so humbly to me?”

“I’ve got a date.”

And Dustin, the little bastard–he laughs. A deep, rumbling belly laugh, so pure and unfiltered that the three other occupied tables in the diner pause their conversations to get a look at the boy clutching his sides.

Steve’s a little embarrassed by the attention, but even more embarrassed that Dustin’s reaction is so genuine. The fact that the idea of him having a date is so laughable is a bit of a punch to the gut. It hasn’t really been that long, has it?

When Dustin’s laughter finally dies down he realizes Steve’s face is completely serious, and it makes him giggle even more.

“Wait, you’re actually serious? Who on earth did you manage to pull?”

Steve’s nearly bashful as he says your name, and even more bashful when Dustin’s jaw visibly drops.

“No fucking way. I’d believe anyone else, but her? She’s like… hotter than Phoebe Cates. There’s no way you wouldn’t strike out with her.”

Steve’s immediately on the defensive. Is it really so hard to believe that he, former king of Hawkins High, could pull the most gorgeous girl in town?

But that’s just it. There’s really no one like you, not in his eyes. He’s admired you since freshman year and never once even tried with you because he knew he wasn’t worthy. You were always in the background–a beautiful, kind, smart, funny girl just out of his reach. Part of the reason he even asked you out was because he was so sure he would strike out. In the end, losing his confidence was exactly what he needed to pull the girl of his dreams.

And that’s why there’s so much riding on this. You’ve always been his biggest “what if”, the girl he wonders about when thinking that maybe not trying has been holding him back. And apparently, it has.

“Look, I don’t even know how it happened, okay? But she said yes, and… and I really don’t want to blow it.”

“Well duh. You’ll have to leave town if you blow it with her, you know that, right? If she doesn’t think you’re worth it, no one else in this town ever will again.”

“That’s exactly what I’m afraid of!��� Steve groans, slouching down so far in the booth that Dustin can just barely see his poor, overwhelmed face.

“Steve, listen…” Dustin’s voice takes on an almost fatherly quality, an omniscient tone that gives off the illusion of great hidden knowledge. He gets like this sometimes, and Steve’s not always sure that it is just an illusion. “Don’t let this go to your head, but you’re, like, one of the coolest guys I know. If she doesn’t like you… that’s her problem, not yours. Okay?”

Steve straightens in his seat, a little shocked to hear such kind words from a friend that he’s used to being mercilessly teased by.

“No, no, no, it’s going to your head. I take it all back. Forget I said anything.” Dustin’s hearty giggle makes Steve smile as he sets a wad of bills on the table and slides out of the booth.

“You’re not so bad Henderson, you know that?” He gives the younger boy’s full head of curls an affectionate ruffle. “Thanks, kid. I’ll radio later.”

Not that Steve didn’t have total faith in his young protege, but it’s still a relief that the pep talk turned out to be exactly what he needed to hear. Dustin’s right, after all. Steve’s worked hard to become the man he’s always wanted to be. He may not be dripping charisma or sex appeal the way he used to, but he’s much more comfortable in his own skin. That’s what counts, right?

And you really are his dream girl. The opportunity to take you out tonight, even if it ends up being your first and only date together, is an honor. He’s much less focused now on all the ways he could screw up, hyper-fixated on putting the effort in to make this the best night of your life.

That effort comes out in the carefully selected suit jacket he dons over his white button-up, the extra spritz of cologne, the careful touch-up shave to vanquish his five o’clock shadow, the extra ten minutes using the perfect amount of product in his hair so that it stays in place yet is still soft to the touch.

By the time he gets to Enzo’s (half an hour early, mind), he’s practically vibrating with nerves and anticipation. He’s never been much of an overthinker, but he sure is tonight. Is this place too much for the first date? Would you rather do something lowkey, like catch a movie or go for a walk in the park? He has to remind himself a couple of times that you agreed to this, that you wouldn’t have said yes if you weren’t interested in the arrangement.

To say he’s prepared for this is putting it lightly. He’s run through every possible scenario in his mind, gone over conversation starters and questions he wants to ask you over and over again until he knows exactly how he wants to phrase each thing.

And still, nothing could prepare him for when you walk through the door.

He has to physically restrain his jaw from dropping because in the moment he sees you, every well-planned thought and all etiquette is flushed down the proverbial pipes. You’re nothing short of breathtaking in a dress that hugs all the right curves and shows just enough cleavage to have him imagining what else there might be to see. Your hair is pinned back out of your face, eyes framed by just the slightest bit of makeup to make the color of your irises pop. He swears he’s never seen a shade quite like them. It’s like you move in slow motion as you approach him–he sees the entrance of the smoking hot love interest in every romantic comedy, complete with smoke and fireworks, as you move towards the table.

And then some sense of decorum returns to his addled brain, and he quickly shoots up so he can pull out your chair for you like a proper gentleman. He catches just the slightest whiff of your perfume, and he’s a goner. He’s ready to sign his life away to you, to yank his own heart out of his chest to offer to your careful hands.

He has to give his head a shake to compose himself before he goes any further off the deep end. No one’s ever thoroughly shaken him the way you have, and it’s been a matter of thirty seconds. It’s almost intimidating, the effect you have on him.

“You look… incredible,” he fumbles as he takes his seat across from you. “I mean, you always do, but… wow.”

The shy giggle you emit tugs at a heartstring he didn’t even know he had.

“Thank you,” you tell him with a genuine smile. “You clean up very well yourself.”

“I do like to put in some effort every once in a while.” He flashes the most charming smile he can muster, and just like that he’s back. His resolve to impress you is reinforced tenfold. You’ve shaken him, and it’s such an unfamiliar feeling that he’s practically bumbling. He wants to shake you just as badly.

The food’s delicious, and the conversation’s even better. He has a track record for taking out a more–for lack of a better term–bimbo-y type, and that’s definitely not you. You’re smart, you’re witty, but you don’t make him feel like an idiot. He’s so taken with you that he doesn’t even notice that three hours have passed until he looks around the room and notices that every table is now empty and bussed.

The waiter delivers the check, and Steve notices you gnawing on your lip.

“What’s on your mind?” He asks, trying not to be too prying.

“I don’t want this to be over yet.”

Steve smiles. He’s got you; hook, line, and sinker. He’s never been so sure of anything, and that surprises him. He’s used to dates who are easy to read and even easier to take home, and those aren’t the impressions you’ve been giving him. To know that you’re feeling exactly what he’s feeling is a huge confidence boost.

“I don’t either.”

Your hand is so small compared to his. That’s all he can think about as he strolls next to you, his fingers intertwined with yours. He’s always considered hand-holding to be child’s play, it’s never excited him before the way it does in this moment with you.

It’s pitch black in the park and he can hear the overlapping chirping of summer cicadas and grasshoppers, the perfect background noise now that the conversation has died down. It’s less about getting to know each other at this point and more just basking in each other’s presence, prolonging the inevitable because neither one of you can bear to call it a night when it’s been such a good few hours.

You’re shocked, to say the very least. Steve certainly has a reputation, and it’s not for being a romantic. Yet everything tonight has flown in the face of all the rumors you’ve been hearing since junior high. You figured he’d be a fun fling, and probably only one night at that–you’d made your peace with the idea. To find that he’s kind, considerate, funny, and can match your intellect and quick wit… it’s a very pleasant surprise. And that’s what has you out well past a decent hour, giddy over simply holding his hand like you’re a damned school girl all over again.

“I should probably let you go home,” Steve sighs wistfully. He hates to be the one to bring it up, but you’re on your fifth lap around the park and about to circle back to where your car is parked so now seems the best time.

You’re chewing your lip again, a thoughtful habit that makes his heart pound just a little bit harder.

Here’s the thing: you’re really not the bold type. You act confident, sure, but in practice it’s a lot more difficult for you. So no one’s more surprised than you are when you say, “You could come home with me. If you want.”

Steve’s definitely shocked, too. Less shocked at your proposition and more at the fact that he’s tempted to decline. Because no matter how much he’s been running through the back of his mind what you might look like under that gorgeous dress, he doesn’t want this to end there. For the first time in his life, he wants to find more meaning than sex out of a relationship. He doesn’t want to take you home and never see you again. He wants to take you out again, and again, and again, and again after that. He sees a future, for once, that doesn’t look dim and hopeless. That fact alone scares the shit out of him.

He realizes he’s waited way too long to reply and fumbles for an answer. “Of course I want to. I’d be an idiot not to. But…”

You chew that cursed bottom lip of yours again, and Steve has to focus on the obvious cue you’re giving him rather than the fact that he wants to be the next set of teeth around that lip.

He stops in his tracks, gently pulling on your hand to face him so he can take your other hand in his free one. “It’s not a bad but. I mean, I’m going to go home kicking myself for saying no because I really honestly do want to… well, y’know. But… I want to do this right with you. I want to take you out again. I want to get to know you and see where this goes. I can’t… I don’t want this to end tonight.”

He’s eternally grateful for how dark it is as he feels a flush consume his face. He can’t remember a time he’s been so honest and open, especially on a first date; but the look on your face tells him he’s done something right.

“Okay,” you tell him, squeezing his hands in yours. “You… honestly have no clue how nice it is to hear that.”

“Of course,” he continues, “if you just want me for my body, no hard feelings.”

You laugh at that, genuinely laugh, and Steve thinks it’s the best sound he’s ever heard.

“No,” you reassure him. “No, I… I wanna see where this goes, too.”

You’re stopped only a few paces from your car, and Steve knows with a twist of his gut that this is the end of the night. It makes his gut turn with disappointment, but also with anticipation of when he’ll see you next. Already, his mind is flooding with ideas of where he can take you and what you’ll do together.

You drop one of his hands so you can walk but keep a tight grip on the other until you get to your driver’s side door, hesitating outside because you’re still not ready for this to be over. It takes every ounce of restraint he has not to kiss you, unsure of if that would be moving too fast.

Thankfully, you make the call yourself. Leaning up on your toes, hands against his chest for balance, you press your lips against his and he has to summon every mite of strength not to moan. No one’s ever tasted so sweet, molded against him so perfectly. His hands drift from your shoulders down your arms, coming to rest on your waist as he pulls you just a little bit closer. It’s a fight of will not to overstep, to break off the kiss before it can become too heated. His mind is spinning by the time you break away. He’s aching for more, and he hopes you are too. 

“Goodnight, sweetheart.”

“Goodnight, Steve.”

Your sweet voice replays in his mind all night, long after you’ve gotten into your car and driven away, long after he’s returned to his own vehicle and pulled the radio out from under the driver’s seat to check in with Dustin, long after he arrives home and soaks in a cold shower for longer than he probably should. He doesn’t think he’ll ever get your voice out of his head, and he couldn’t be any less upset about it.

He practically counts down the minutes until he sees you again. This time, he has a little less restraint. He greets you with a kiss–a sweet peck and a hand on your waist that leaves you aching for even more.

It’s a movie this time, a chance to enjoy each other’s company on a night you’re both too tired from working to engage in heavy conversation and getting to know each other further.

It starts with sharing popcorn, then holding hands, then somewhere along the way the film is completely forgotten in favor of your lips meeting his. His breath grows heavy as his hands hold your face, committing you to memory while resisting the urge to explore further. Your hands, meanwhile, are firmly on his thighs, gripping tightly to keep yourself steady as you do everything you can to keep yourself from crawling into his lap.

He whispers your name, and your grip on him tightens.

“W-we shouldn’t…” he murmurs, then gives up on the futile attempt at finishing his sentence so that he can pull you even deeper into the kiss as his tongue sweeps across your bottom lip.

It takes everything in him not to moan when your lips eagerly part to accept him.

Needless to say, once the credits start rolling you’re both more than a little hot under the collar.

“Let me buy you dinner,” Steve suggests as he woefully unwinds himself from you. Declining doesn’t even flicker through your mind as a possibility.

It’s not Enzo’s this time, but it doesn’t have to be. He could set a soggy peanut butter and jelly sandwich in front of you at this point and you’d still thank him for it. This time around, you’re not really as interested in the cuisine as you are just simply getting through this meal to what’s next. Because what’s next is all you’ve been thinking about since you walked through the doors the night of that very first date and saw Steve Harrington wearing a blazer for you. It’s a level of effort he’s definitely not known for–in fact, he’s built a reputation for putting in so little effort that it nearly made your jaw drop to see him trying. And it certainly made your heart skip a beat.

But then again, the Steve before you carelessly wolfing down his bacon cheeseburger seems very different from the Steve you knew in high school, even if you didn’t know that iteration as intimately as this one. That one was cool, collected, snarky and pompous and maddeningly desirable.

This Steve, your Steve, is nearly an exact foil. Much less cocky, a little less confident but more self-assured in the ways that actually hold meaning, less worried about what the people around him are observing of him than what you’re observing of him. He seems happier, more carefree, more eager to please others than simply himself. He’s grown so much in such a short amount of time, and you feel proud just for having the honor to witness it. Significantly more proud to be on the receiving end of his affections now that they hold the kind of value you’ve always wished they would.

He looks up and notices you staring at him while lost in thought, a small smile spreading across his lips as your eyes quickly dart away.

“What’s on your mind?” He questions as he licks a stray bit of ketchup from his thumb.

“Just… happy I’m here. With you.” It brings heat to your cheeks to admit it, but you don’t want him to go unappreciated in this moment.

It’s the right thing to say, because his smile grows even wider. “I’m happy too,” he admits. “I… I’ve wanted to ask you out for a while. Could never work up the courage, I guess.”

“Steve ‘the hair’ Harrington was intimidated by me?” You say it with a mock gasp, but your shock is more genuine than you give off. Never in a million years would you have thought that he, the man who could have whoever he wanted, would be worried over you saying no to him. It’s almost comical, especially considering the way you practically threw yourself at him on your first date. Of course then, you had no clue how much he’d developed as a person. You’re almost ashamed of your behavior now, as if you might’ve inadvertently been taking advantage of the new and improved Steve who isn’t just into you for a hookup.

He shrugs, nearly bashful at your teasing. “Never figured I was good enough for you. So I didn’t bother to try.”

You’re genuinely curious now, leaning in a little closer and brushing your fingers against his hand resting atop the diner counter. “What made you change your mind?”

“Honestly? I was so sure you’d say no that I asked just to give Robin a chuckle. She loves watching me get shot down.”

That makes you frown, and he’s quick to backtrack. “I wanted to! I just… I’ve had a bad track record lately. And you’re… you’re you. You’re the last person I should be worthy of.”

His eyes are quick to avert from your gaze, bottom lip tugged between his teeth as he contemplates whether he’s said too much.

“Steve…” you properly grab his hand now in the hopes that it’ll bring his eyes back to you, and it works. “You’re the only person I’ve deemed worthy in a long time, honestly.”

Steve Harrington is scaldingly warm. It’s one of many sensations forcing your mind into overdrive as he lays you delicately across the backseat of his beemer, one hand cushioning the back of your head while simultaneously deepening the already heated kiss and the other balancing his weight to lean over you in the cramped space without completely crushing you.

Your fingers tangle themselves into his soft brown locks, tugging ever-so-slightly as his tongue slips between your parted lips. He’s an eager explorer and you’re more than happy to let him take the lead, to show you all the skill you’ve heard so many whispers about.

You let out an involuntary moan as he wedges himself even closer to you, his body heat soaking through all the layers of clothing between the two of you and warming you all the way to your very bones.

You’re practically aching, ready to beg, and he knows it the second you wrap your legs around his waist in an attempt to get him even closer. If there’s one thing Steve Harrington’s good at, it’s assessing your needs. He pulls away just the slightest bit to adjust his position so he can get closer, wedging a knee between your legs to press right against your core, and it makes you jolt back against the car door at the same time his head hits the roof just a bit too hard.

You both pause for a moment, the reality of your situation hitting you simultaneously, and then you’re laughing. It’s light and edged with unresolved want, but it’s enough to fracture the tension of the moment.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers. “Shouldn’t have gotten so carried away. This isn’t how I want to do this.”

“No?”

“No. You deserve way better than this old beater,” he chuckles, then leans down to kiss you. This kiss is lighter, no longer edged with tension and lust. He kisses you just to kiss you–there’s no end goal to it this time.

“What could be better than a BMW?” You tease lightly, trying to reassure him that you’re less disappointed than you really feel.

“You know. Something romantic. A proper bed, rose petals, maybe a few candles…”

“I don’t need all that,” you try to tell him.

“I think I do,” he admits. And that’s enough to pull you back, to remind you that you need to be patient and grateful that he values you so much as to want to do this whole thing properly. That his affection is something to be cherished, not taken for granted.

“I’m sorry,” you whisper. “I didn’t mean to be pushy.”

“Please don’t apologize.” He hesitates to untangle himself from you, even though he knows he needs to. “I want this just as bad. I just… I need it to be right.”

“As long as I have you, it’ll be right,” you reassure. “I hope you know that.”

He presses his lips to yours again, a slow and passionate kiss that he hopes communicates every bit of adoration he feels for you in this moment.

“It’ll be perfect. I swear,” he vows. You’ve never believed anything more whole-heartedly than you do this promise. 

~~~

“Wait, you’re telling me that you literally had her under you and you stopped?” Robin’s halfway through chewing a mouthful of popcorn and the absolute carnage inside her agape mouth makes Steve give her a light shove.

“It’s not polite to talk with your mouth full, y’know.”

“It’s not polite to blue-ball either!” She shoots back in utter disbelief.

“How do you think I felt? I was this close,” he holds his thumb and index finger barely millimeters apart, “to sealing the deal.”

She just shakes her head. “You, Steve Harrington, are a genuine, bonafide idiot.”

She’s not telling him anything he doesn’t know. It’s been three days since the aborted fling in the backseat of his car, and he’s barely thought of anything else. Especially since you’ve been away from home both of the past nights when he’s called. He’s starting to worry you’ve gotten the wrong impression, that he’s not interested or that he’s toying with you. It’s the exact opposite. He wants nothing more than to know you in the most intimate way he can know you. But he needs it to be flawless. He needs it to be well thought-out and precisely planned, the most romantic event in the history of copulation. He won’t settle for anything less, not with you. You deserve perfection, and he won’t give you anything less.

“It’s not that I don’t want to,” he tries to explain. “I want to more than anything. But if you’re gonna go to town on a goddess, you need to do some worshiping, y’know? I don’t feel like I’ve done enough.”

Your heart pounds in your chest as you hear this admission. You weren’t sure what to expect–worried that maybe visiting him at work was an overstep–but hearing him call you a goddess certainly wasn’t on your radar.

“You’ve done more than enough, Steve.”

The sound of your voice makes Steve jump and whirl around, oblivious to Robin’s sly smirk and mumbled excuse of needing to attend to something in the back room.

“H-hey!” He squeaks, then clears his throat in an attempt to get his tone back to its normal octave. “What… what’re you doing here?”

“Oh, just came to pick up a tape,” you tease. “But mostly I came to see you.”

“Me?” He takes a moment to ground himself, loosening his too-tight grip on the counter. “I mean… I tried to call you last night. And the night before?”

Your brow furrows. “Really? I didn’t get your message.”

Because he didn’t leave one. He clears his throat and says, “I just figured you were busy.”

“Oh, well, I volunteer at the animal shelter on Wednesdays, and last night was my friend’s 21st birthday. I’m sorry I missed you, though.”

He can tell that you’re really remorseful, and it makes his heart squeeze in his chest a little bit. He plays it off with a dismissive wave of his hand. “No, it’s fine, it’s… are you free tonight?”

You giggle at the abrupt redirect, but he’s played directly into your hand.

“Yeah, actually. I was hoping maybe you could help me pick out something for us to watch tonight? If you’re free too, that is.”

His dark eyes blink slowly, wondering if you’re aware of the implication behind your completely innocent words. You. Him. A movie. Alone. It’s enough to make his head spin. 

“I’ve never been freer.”

Conveniently, you’ve come in close enough to the end of his shift that by the time you’re done combing through Family Video’s vast selection for the perfect film to use as background noise, Steve’s ready to clock out. And since you walked over after finishing your own shift at the local dollar store up the street, it works out perfectly that he can give you a ride straight to his place.

You only glance in the backseat once, but it’s enough to get your mind churning. Remembering the feeling of him, of what could’ve been. Anticipating what will be.

“Parents home?” You ask as he pulls into his driveway and parks, trying to sound casual and utterly failing.

“Nope,” he answers easily. “Took a detour to Cabo on their way home from Hawaii.”

“Sounds glamorous. You opted out?”

“I’d rather be here in Hawkins with you than on a beach alone anyday.”

He must know the effect his words have on you. Surely he can hear the way your heart picks up pace as he looks at you with those dark, affectionate eyes.

“So… this is home.” He waves a hand around the entrance hall like it’s a shabby nightmare, not the grandest house you’ve ever been in.

“I’m starting to understand why they used to call you King Steve.”

He’s almost embarrassed at the mention of that old high school nickname. “Trust me, this isn’t why.”

“Well, a palace does befit you,” you tell him with a smirk.

“Stop, you’re gonna make me blush.” The wink he shoots you makes your gut erupt with butterflies, a sensation that would normally make you a little uncomfortable. With Steve, you’d take the butterflies all day long.

He gives you a cursory and oversimplified tour of the ground floor before leading you upstairs, and suddenly he’s sheepish. It’s been a few moons since he shared his room with a girl, so the nerves are justified. But that’s too simple an explanation. You’re not a girl. You’re his dream, his muse, his–to re-quote himself–goddess. No one he’s ever cared about more has stood where you’re standing, and it terrifies him.

He hides it well, though, busying himself with making a comfortable nest for you in his bed before setting up the television set on the dresser against the far wall. If ever there was a time to regain his confidence, it’s now. He curses whatever god there is that he feels like a fumbling virgin in this moment when nothing is even happening, when just the anticipation is enough to make his hands tremble.

There’s no more stalling once you’re comfortable and the tape is set to play. His heart pounds to the steady and frantic rhythm of one of those heavy rock songs Dustin listens to now as he sits next to you, hands itching to take a hold of you but also eager not to move too fast.

Almost as if you can sense his hesitation, you reach over and take his hand. “Steve?”

“Yeah?”

“Kiss me.”

And so he does, and the second his lips slot to yours all the worry and anxiety is gone. He’s Steve Harrington, and he knows what he’s doing. You’re you, and he’s wanted this for so long. After years of being lost, he deserves to finally find the love he’s been looking for. He’s never been so sure of anything as he is, in this moment of initial clarity, that he’s in love with you.

He can’t say it, not yet. He’s sure it’s too soon, and the last thing he wants is to scare you off. But he’s determined to prove it to you, and the only way besides words is action.

He can handle action.

There’s no more restraint or hesitation behind his touch. This is it, this is what you’ve both been waiting for. There’s no way in hell he’s not going to deliver now. He’s desperate for you, and it shows in the heavy way his hands drag along your curves whilst committing you to memory; the way his tongue languidly swipes across your bottom lip; the way he shifts effortlessly to hover over you even while deepening the kiss.

He’s overwhelming every single sense of yours in such a sudden fashion, and you wouldn’t want it any other way. Especially not when his hips meet yours in a deliciously slow grind and you finally get your first little taste of what’s to come.

He keens at the little breathless whimpers that leave your mouth, reading every single signal you provide him with and accommodating each. Moaning? He continues what he’s doing, intensifying if deemed necessary. Whining? He adds something, because he knows it’s hard to use your words when you’re wanting so badly. Squirming? He pays attention to the direction of your movement and pulls away or presses closer depending on necessity. It’s down to science for him; he only really cared about extracurriculars in school anyway, and this was certainly his favorite.

But then he comes to his senses–while he doesn’t pull away completely, he needs to clear his mind and he does so by letting up a bit, allowing the kiss to become languid and the heat to extinguish a bit. It only makes you whine more, and Steve curses his damned formula. You shouldn’t be part of an equation. You’re everything he’s ever wanted, and every aspect of your relationship so far has been a new experience for him. He needs this particular activity to be different too. No formulas or calculations. Just you and him and whatever happens naturally.

Clearly you can hear the cogs in his mind turning. You pull away with a concerned look on your face and ask, “what’s on your mind?”

Now’s not the time to hide anything from you, he reasons with himself. He wants to be authentic with you, and part of that means telling the truth, even if it’s not something particularly comfortable.

“I’m… falling into a routine. And I don’t want to,” he admits. He sighs and leans back, one hand dragging through his shaggy and disheveled hair, sure that he’s going to ruin the mood if he carries on like this. But he refuses to back away from the truth now. “This… it’s always been like…. Like a series of checkpoints. Boxes to check, y’know? Kiss you, take your clothes off, make you come, fuck you, say goodnight. And I don’t want… I can’t let it be like that with you. I need this to be… real. Not just some list to cross shit off of. I don’t–”

Steve takes a long, shaky breath before he can ramble on anymore. Never has someone so thoroughly gotten under his skin. He’s never felt so insecure, so unsure. It’s terrifying. The most terrifying part of it all, though, is that he likes it. He loves the feeling of the unfamiliarity, of doing this right. In a way, it’s almost like he’s doing all of this for the first time all over again. You’re his first date, first kiss, first time. All because he’s changed so drastically, because he’s not even remotely the same person he was just a year or two ago.

Your hands are so gentle as you cup his face, tenderly forcing his eyes to meet yours.

“Steve… we don’t have to do this, not if you’re not ready. I want to be with you, not just for this, but for everything. Everything that comes with you… that’s what I want. There’s no pressure. I would wait a hundred years for you to be ready so long as I could still have you.”

Steve’s breath shakes a little as he comprehends the gravity of your words. There’s nothing he can say that can properly convey the gratitude he holds for your words, so he says nothing at all.

In his silence, you continue. “You’re more than a body, you know that, right? You’re funny, and kind, and smart. Yes, smart, don’t look at me like that. You’re everything I’ve ever wanted to be close to. I just… I want to spend time with you. I want to watch stupid movies and eat diner food until we get sick and laugh at your stupid jokes… and maybe make love with you, sure, but that’s pretty low on the list as long as I just get to be with you.”

He doesn’t notice the tears until it’s too late–by the time you’re wiping them from the apples of his cheeks it’s far too late to take them back or hide them. With anyone else, he would be angry; at himself, for allowing himself to be so vulnerable. For allowing himself to be so emotional. With you, though… with you, his emotions make him feel strong. 

For the first time since you walked into his life, he’s not scared of losing you.

“I love you,” he tells you. His voice is firm, as fierce as the kiss he presses to your mouth, as powerful as the waves of emotion vibrating through his very soul. “I love you so much.”

He barely gives you a chance to reply, as keen as he is on physically proving his love to you through myriad passionate kisses that leave you breathless. But when you finally get the chance to use your voice after a barrage of kisses that start to trail down your neck, you whisper, “I love you too.”

Four words, and they’re all he needs to quell every worry or fear he’s had over doing this relationship properly with you. Why should he have to worry, after all, when he’s already succeeded? 

“I love you,” he whispers as he trails down your neck and to your chest, leaving tender love bites on the tops of your breasts once he’s properly liberated you from your shirt.

“I love you,” he mumbles through sucking a mark a few inches north of your navel.

“I love you,” he murmurs when his lips meet your waistband. His fingers make quick work of your pants as he scatters kisses over your stomach, unable to part his mouth from your skin for even a moment.

“I love you,” he affirms as his mouth meets your hot and waiting core.

There’s no more checklist. Because this isn’t simply sex, as it always has been for him in the past. This is love-making: the kind of sappy shit they talk about in all those Hallmark movies that he rolls his eyes at the sight of. It’s like losing his virginity all over again.

He understands the old adage of “the other half” now. You’ve ripped him to shreds and sewed him back together with strands of yourself. The end result is better than the original ever could’ve even dreamed to be. He’s sure he couldn’t possibly live without you now, that losing you would be like ripping out fresh and unhealed stitches.

You’re not sure how long he camps out between your trembling thighs, but it’s long enough for you to lose count of the number of times he pulls you apart–first with his languid tongue; then his long, curved fingers; then a combination of the two. It’s like he loses himself completely in your pleasure, not a single thought in his head except what he can do to bring you to the edge again, and again, and again.

You’re trembling with oversensitivity by the time his own needs overtakes his desperation to unravel you. So out of it that you feel drunk, like Steve’s laced you with absolute bliss so pure you can barely stand it.

You’re hardly present enough to appreciate the adonis before you when he finally undoes his own jeans, and that’s a damned shame because he’s so damned pretty. Long and thick, flushed at the girthy tip from his hitherto unacknowledged arousal. His lean thighs are pure muscle, and the dark thatch of hair that trails south from his navel makes your mouth water. He’s everything you dreamed he’d be and so much more.

“Steve…” You don’t know what else you can possibly say. All you can do is vainly hope that one whine of his name can convey all of the heat, frustration, tension, and above all longing, swirling through your head in the moment.

He breaks from his lustful reverie for a moment to smile as he leans in for another heated kiss; you think it’s safe to say you’ve gotten your point across.

He slows from his mania for a few moments, lips tender as they explore against yours once more. These kisses are languid, slow, yet no less heated. Even now, he’s trying to prove his love to you. As if you could somehow not believe him after everything that’s happened, every small moment you’ve spent with him witnessing how hard he’s trying for you.

Somewhere in between kisses he manages to wrestle a condom out of his nightstand, miraculously without ever breaking from your lips.

Now is where you cut in, finally fading out of your over-pleasured fugue and back to reality. You take the little foil packet from his hands and tear it open, eager for this small chance to finally get a hand or two on him.

He lets out the most gorgeous noise you’ve ever heard as you roll the rubber down his length; a deep, earthy, diaphragmatic moan just from the simple touch of your hand. You want to touch him even more, to wrest out more of those sounds from him; to see what other undiscovered responses you can pull from him as you pleasure him. But you know that now, he needs to set the pace. He believes he has something to prove, and you’re more than happy to let him prove it. There will be plenty of other opportunities to have him completely at your mercy, anyway.

There’s no way to describe the feeling as he slides into you. It’s more than bliss, more than euphoria, more than earth-shattering toe-curling mind-altering pleasure. It’s nothing more than feeling whole. Of never knowing you were missing a part of yourself until it’s suddenly returned to you. Of never knowing what home felt like until this exact moment.

Maybe it’s overdramatic. Maybe it’s outlandish and outrageous and a million other adjectives to feel something so overpowering and overwhelming from such a seemingly simple physical act. But in this moment, you know you’ve never felt anything as right as being connected to Steve in this way.

His lips hardly leave yours while he rolls his hips against you, easily finding the perfect angle to make your breath hitch and your hands scrabble for purpose.

It admittedly doesn’t last long, but it doesn’t have to. Once you start to tighten and pulse around him, he’s a goner–deep purposeful thrusts turning to hard, arrhythmic plunges in desperate search of release.

You’re still shaking from your high when he slowly pulls out of you. He keeps you close, arms linked around your waist and dragging you to lay on his chest as he flops back against the pillows. 

You’re not sure how long you lay like that, with Steve whispering sweet nothings into your hair and pressing absentminded kisses to your face. All you can really focus on is one all-consuming, life-changing fact.

“I love you, Steve Harrington.”

“I love you too,” he whispers back. He kisses you again, just a simple peck on your lips, and you know that he’s telling the truth. It’s an eternal truth: one that can’t be changed or altered in any way. Steve Harrington loves you with every fibre of his being, and he will for the rest of his life–even if you’re both blissfully unaware of it for now.

THE END

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[miraclewoozi]

ODE TO A CONVERSATION (STUCK IN YOUR THROAT) - c.sc

Everything with Seungcheol has always been easy. Easier than with anyone else, anyway.  (and it hits me — i don’t want anybody else touching you like i do, like i do, like me. is it okay? that i don’t want anybody else touching you like i do.)

pairing; choi seungcheol x fem!reader.  genre; smut (MINORS DO NOT INTERACT) with a little bit of plot. friends-ish to lovers to (healthy) exes to fwb to -- warnings; writing early parts of this felt low-key pretentious but it was kinda on purpose because i was trying something stylistic and outside my normal?? so??? but on a real: swearing. alcohol consumption (they aren’t drunk at the time of having sex). reader is written to be wearing makeup. it's kinda just filth. proof read but all the words just melted together eventually (if i missed a typo, no i didn't <3) smut warnings under the cut! w/c; 6k. a/n; del water gap’s ode to a conversation stuck in your throat was my most listened to song last year. i now can’t listen to it without thinking about s.coups (i also just point blank can't stop thinking about s.coups) -- enjoy x

smut warnings: big! dick! seungcheol!, making out, fingering, oral (f rec), unprotected p-in-v sex (make good choices), lil bit of edging if u squint, overstimulation if u tilt ur head like 82º to the left, manhandling, soft-ish dom!cheol, lotta praise, use of pet names (babe, baby good girl, my girl, sweetheart), kinda possessive!cheol, jealous!cheol, biting and marking (hickeys, digging nails in), light light light light light crying/dacryphilia (not really, like there are Some tears in eyes but just to be safe ig)

Everything with Seungcheol has always been easy. 

Easier than with anyone else, anyway. 

You’d known him in passing for a long time before anything happened. A friend of a friend — someone you always smiled at and chatted with at social events, because he was easy to smile at, and so very easy to chat to. You can’t even remember which birthday or New Year’s party or Halloween bash or Saturday night jamboree was the first: they’ve since all just dissolved into one pleasantly foggy memory, and every time you saw him thereafter he made you feel so comfortable, so at home that it felt like the hundredth.

And it continued that way for a few years. Pleasantries exchanged in friends' kitchens, conversations across beer-garden tables. Catching up on each other's lives in a hallway outside the bathroom for handfuls of minutes at a time before one of you inevitably got tugged away by the friend you were waiting for. You were comfortable with him, around him: he just had that kind of energy. So on a big group night out one evening, when you found yourself feeling a little uncomfortable being flirted with by someone you had never met, you instinctively flashed Seungcheol a look from across the bar. He came straight over and immediately to your rescue; with him slipping all too naturally into the fake role of your unimpressed significant other, you realised that it was easy to be whisked away under his arm, easy to let him buy you your next drink, easy to let him kiss you breathless just to really drive the pretend point home. 

Staring up at him after, feeling his drink-chilled hands cupping your cheeks, watching his gaze flicker between your lips and your eyes, you realised that igniting a spark had never felt so…

And it was easy to kiss him again later that night under the influence of a little too much wine and blanketed by a couple of lowered inhibitions. It was easy to giggle into the crook of his neck as he leaned against a stone wall, trailing his fingers up and down your arms, rambling about how he wanted to kiss you again and again and again and forever, maybe, because he thought your smile was beautiful and your lips were so soft and you tasted like cherries, and he liked cherries, and if you could kiss him every day he’d never have a reason to be unhappy ever again. It was so fucking easy to fumble in your purse for your phone, to let him put in his number, and when he asked you if he could take you out for dinner, when he messily typed a text message out begging the same question and sent it to you (‘so we both remember, tomorrow’), it was so, so easy to say yes. 

Then, the first date? It was beyond easy. You talked and talked and laughed and laughed, each of you having a few cocktails with your food, never running short of conversation, never not finding little ways to touch each other both under and over the table. Arranging the second, and then the third, and inviting him up for a coffee after date number five was easy, and falling into bed with him was easy. Holding him close, your sweat-slicked bodies moving as one entity in the dark: it was easy, and the pillow-talk after about what this growing thing between you was, came so damn…

So you introduced him to your parents, and your other friends, and in turn he did the same with you. Two and a half years breezed by, then, and even the hard parts… Even the arguing and time spent away from one-another, whether he was sleeping out on your couch following an emotionally charged spat or trips taken as part of his job demanded he spend weeks at a time without you. The hard parts? By comparison to everyone before him, they were easy. Anniversaries and birthdays and Valentine’s days: he spoiled you, and you doted on him, and being together was just so–…

Even the day you decided to end your romantic pursuit, while impassioned, wasn’t hard. In part, maybe it was because it was a long time coming: you still loved each other deeply but your lives were so chaotic and different, and it wasn’t fair to keep waiting around for each other when it just clearly wasn’t your time. And in part, because he was so calm in how he held your hand tightly in his (even when he dried your tears), how he kissed your forehead, in how he told you that you deserved more than the life he could give you. And at the end of it all, when he promised to always be there for you, naturally you promised the same back. 

Keeping that promise? Well. It was easy. 

So what if it took a few weeks for things to feel sort of normal? If you had to remember how to greet him without offering your lips for a kiss or your arms for a hug? If you had to get used to sleeping alone, and waking up alone, all over again? The thing that mattered was that he was still in your life, and you were still in his: your relationship wasn’t broken, it was just different, and once the little transition period was over, once you were both used to your new normal… Being ‘just friends’ was kind of easy. 

(Kind of, being the operative phrase.)

Six months post split, you mentioned to him in passing that you were going on a date the following day. As soon as you realised what you’d said, you regretted bringing it up, but without missing a beat Seungcheol lowered his drink and raised an eyebrow at you, excitedly asking you to tell him everything. The person’s name, what they were like, how you met them, where you were going. He didn’t feel like your ex-boyfriend, then and there: he felt like a best friend. So you told him every detail, and he listened intently, following up by requesting you text him when you got to the date and again when you got home so he knew you were safe. Of course, you said that you would. First, because it was sensible. Second, his requests were easy enough.  

And the date went okay, all things considered: the guy was nice, if a little bit awkward, and you had a good time bowling with him and playing some games in the old arcade, but there just wasn’t a spark. Everything felt difficult. Forced. So when he was the one to say to you after that he’d had a nice evening but felt that maybe you should just be friends, you couldn’t help but feel relieved. Letting out a breath and giving a genuine smile, you agreed, thanking him for his refreshing candour, before bidding him good night and making your way back to your car. 

You held your phone between your fingertips for a while as the engine ran and the heating started to kick in, slowly warming you from the outside, in. As you thawed, you bit the inside of your cheek absentmindedly, a potentially questionable decision planting itself in your mind. Your body didn’t mind how good of an idea your brain thought it was, though. Your fingers moved entirely of their own accord; finding and pressing Seungcheol’s contact name was so starkly different to everything else had been, all damn night. It was easy. His sleep-roughened voice drifting down the phone sounded so easy. Asking if he minded you swinging by his place for a coffee and a debrief felt easy.

Two hours later, writhing on his mattress, two orgasms deep with his head still buried between your thighs and one of his hands groping at your tit as if his life depended on it?

Fucking. Easy.

So then, started the pattern. Waking up the next morning absolutely swimming in one of his oversized t-shirts should’ve felt like guilt and a betrayal of all your self-growth, of your moving on, of your friendship. It should’ve felt uncomfortable and gross and maybe a little panic-inducing, but it never did. It was warm and cosy, it was familiar and comforting, and when he greeted you ‘good morning’ with a pillow to the face, you knew that nothing was ruined; rather, this was just another new difference to your ever-changing relationship with him. Waking up this way… Well, it felt—

Look, you’re only human. You both have needs. After spending two and a half years learning each other's bodies, being together in that way again came so, so… 

After every date gone wrong, after every stressful week at work, in the midst of every family drama and friendship breakdown, you found yourself seeking respite in his apartment, between his bedsheets. In his tongue lapping at your pussy; in the head of his cock bruising the back of your throat until he spilled his release into your mouth; in the slow, deep, precise thrusts of his hips as he buried himself inside you over and over and over and over, taking your mind off the stress and concentrating only on making you feel good, on helping you forget everyone and everything else–… 

And now?

Well, now, you’re on your way back from yet another miserable date.

About three months ago, you stopped even considering giving the taxi drivers directions to your own place. Now, when you slide into the backseat, you automatically reel off the address you always end up at after a night like this. When your dates only talk about themselves, or say something so wildly out of pocket that it makes your toes curl (and not in a good way), or exclusively go on and on and on about their ‘crazy’ ex partner, you’ve grown all too used to showing up pouting at your friend’s front door. 

What? 

Being greeted by his knowing smirk and him inviting you inside is familiar; stepping across the threshold and kicking off your shoes in the hallway feels just so… easy.

Flopping down on the couch is easy, and waiting for Seungcheol to come back into the living room with two gleaming glasses and a bottle of wine is easy. Shuffling closer until you have your head resting against his shoulder is easy. Sipping at a chilled glass of rosé with his arm around you, the tip of his finger rubbing tiny circles against the point of your shoulder, eyes fluttering at this perfectly normal, totally platonic, absolutely-not-leading-anywhere-this-time contact is…

“Do you want to talk about it?” he asks a few seconds after you set your now half-empty glass down. Your lips curl a little into a grimace on one side and a soft laugh rumbles deep in his chest.

You swear you can feel it vibrate all the way down to your bones.

“What is there to even talk about?” you sigh. “He wouldn’t stop comparing me to his mother, strike one. Spent twenty minutes explaining the plot of my favourite movie back to me, strike two. And then, after all that, threw a tantrum when I swerved his kiss goodbye after he’d eaten basically a whole loaf of garlic bread. Strike three. You’re out.”

He laughs again, and you adjust your head to peer up at him but he isn’t looking at you. He’s staring off at the opposite wall, not even glancing down when his arm tightens to pull you even closer. On cue, you nuzzle your head down into the muscle beneath his t-shirt, and you sigh. 

“What’s so funny?” you ask. 

“Nothing,” he says breezily. “Just… You sure know how to pick ‘em.”

“I don’t deliberately go out with people one screw short of a toolbox, Cheol,” you grumble, lightly slapping his chest. “They always seem fine when we start talking.”

“Mhm,” he hums. You feel him move slightly and then his lips are being pressed to the part of your hair. You’re sure it’s supposed to be a little condescending, but it kind of tingles instead. But that’s just because of the way his breaths play over your roots. Isn’t it? “I know.”

“Trust me, I’d love nothing more than to find someone who—”

“Hey, I know, y/n,” he says again, still softly but just a little firmer this time. “It’s not your fault all these guys are dicks. But-…”

He trails off, tongue pressed lightly against his top teeth, and decides that maybe finishing this sentence isn’t the smart way to proceed. You wait a few seconds, just in case he changes his mind, and poke at his chest again when he doesn’t. 

“But what?” You ask. 

He shakes his head. “Nothing. It was a stupid joke. Don’t worry about it.”

“Tell me,” you whine. “You know I hate it when you do that.”

It’s his turn to sigh, now. “But…” he starts, pausing for a mixture of allowing his nerves to settle and for dramatic effect. “I’m not complaining: the worse your date goes, the better sex we have after.”

It momentarily stuns you into silence and you suck your teeth at the remark, shaking your head. But you don’t sit up, you don’t shove him away, you don’t argue the point he’s just made whether it was a joke or not. Because…

“I hate that you’re right.”

His hand slides down behind you until it’s wrapped around your waist, his bicep strong against your back and his fingers light as they fiddle with the fabric of your blouse. 

“No you don’t,” he tells you, lips tweaking up on one side. 

You sigh, burrowing closer into his chest. He’s wearing the cologne he knows you like most and it smells faint, worn, as if he’s had it on for hours, all despite being only dressed in basketball shorts and a white vest. His plans tonight started and ended with you, and showing up here wasn’t promised until you were on his doorstep. Something about knowing he wore it just in case triggers an all too familiar ache between your legs.

Giving in to it?

Ha. 

It’s too fucking easy.

“Shut up,” you grumble. Your hand uncurls and your fingers splay over his chest, confessing your agreement and laying the foundations for you even if you deny what you want out loud. “Yes, I do.”

“Oh?” He asks at the exact moment you can feel his nails graze at your skin beneath your shirt. “Do you really?”

“Yeah.” You shift slightly, searching for just a crumb of relief from the press of your thighs, but it never comes. 

“I see.” He flattens his palm against your side, the other hand tucking a piece of hair behind your ear, eyes not quite meeting yours as they fixate on the strands already sliding back to their former place against your cheek. 

He gently clears his throat, tongue darting out over his lips for the most fleeting of moments, and when he speaks again, it’s lower, quieter, softer. “But if you hate it sooo much…” he ducks his head, close enough that his lips brush the corner of your mouth as he moves them. “Why are you here?”

He bumps the tip of his nose against your cheek, subtly turning your face so if you so much as shuffle, hiccup, breathe in too deeply, your smiles would meet. But they don’t. A hair’s breadth apart, you linger, eyes meeting his in a scorching challenge. One he doesn’t back down from. One he holds, and holds, and holds – waiting, for you, for his answer.

“Because,” you croak. Your throat feels dry, your eyelids suddenly heavy, lashes fluttering. 

“Because?” he taunts, his chuckled exhale tickling the tiny hairs all over your skin. 

You maintain his gaze still, and he chuckles, holding your chin between his thumb and forefinger. when you don’t speak for a few seconds more, he takes it upon himself to finish the sentence for you.

“Because you know,” he drawls, gravelly but still somehow heaven-sent and honey-sweet. “That no-one else does it for you the same way I do. Do they?”

You shake your head, the muscles in your neck tight as you wrestle with them not to surge forward and topple against him in a kiss. Seungcheol is an easily pleased man, but you know he loves a bit of a chase and it would be a little rude not to reward his hospitality by giving him one. 

“Say it,” he urges. You’re acutely aware of how his breaths stop fanning against your face once the words are out of his mouth, but you don’t give him anything yet. “Come on. You could have any one of those idiots if you wanted them, but you don’t.” A pause. “Do you?”

You swallow hard, cheeks growing hot. You shake your head again, “No.”

“Because…”

And after one, two, three, four, five thundering beats of your heart—

“Because I want you.”

Seungcheol smirks as he pulls your chin up, finally bringing his plush lips down against your own. It’s soft. almost tender. Barely moving — just a press, but it sends waves of energy through you anyway. 

“You’ve got me,” he says, pulling back an inch, studying your desperate eyes with his own. “Always gonna have me.”

And suddenly, it’s like his entire world might stop if he lets you go.

Both of his hands cup your cheeks as you shift up onto your knees, your own fingers grasping for dear life at his vest. He kisses you as if he could swallow you whole: hard and deep, breathing hot through his nose as his tongue works its way into your mouth and finds your own. You groan, and hearing the sound draws one out of him, too. There’s just something about kissing Seungcheol, and being kissed by him: you don’t even have to think. He just does. You just do. It’s easy.

His hands find the bottom of your shirt and he pulls upwards, separating from your lips to pull it over your head and toss it haphazardly towards the floor. He reconnects with you almost immediately, hands sliding down from your face to your exposed neck, to your shoulders, toying with the strap of your bra.

“You wear this for me, or him?” he asks, breathing heavily as he looks down at your covered tits, the red and white garment sitting pretty against your skin.

“Who d’you think?” you ask, equally fighting to gasp air into your lungs. 

“Better not have been for fuckin’... Captain mommy issues,” he mutters, kissing you hard one more time before his lips attach to the side of your neck. “Never liked the sound of that guy. Thought you were too good for him.”

“S’that right?” You ask, tilting your head back and stuttering out a sigh, lacing it with wisps of a laugh. “You never said so.”

He sucks your skin into his mouth and you swear you can feel every capillary beneath the surface burst one by one, your body-heat climbing to almost unbearable territory. “You were excited,” he says. “Just ‘cause I don't agree with your choices, doesn’t mean I’m gonna be an ass about it.”

And for someone trying their best to cover your throat in as many bruises as possible (no doubt so that if you bump into the asshole from HR who took you out tonight when you’re back at work on Monday, he’ll see that you had a plenty good time without him), it… feels kind of sweet that he’d hold himself back in the name of your theoretical happiness.

“Too good to me,” you chuckle. You’ve long since released your hold on his vest and are now threading your fingers through his hair. He kisses and sucks down over your collarbone, grinning against your skin all the while. 

“So?” he asks, tugging the top of your bra in between his teeth.

You glance down at him, biting your bottom lip at the sight. His pupils are blown-out, drowning his familiar warm, chocolatey eyes in black pools of desire. No lies, that’s always been your agreement. No lies. So you tell him the truth, pushing your chest up towards him and pressing his head down slightly so his top lip brushes against your tit. 

“Wore it for you, Cheol.”

“Mhm. That’s my girl.”

He sits up straight and pulls you down to him, smashing his lips against yours again as his hands slide around your back, fingertips making quick work of your bra clasp. He pulls the straps down your arms, grunting at the feeling of your breasts relaxing against his own chest; the bra joins your shirt on the floor, and soon after follows his vest, your hands clawing at it to get it off him as fast as you can.

“Up,” he says as your hands trail over his stomach, fingers dipping into every groove of muscle, feeling how they ripple as he reflexively tenses them under your touch. “Now.”

You oblige, climbing off the couch and standing upright. His hand finds the back of your shoulder and he guides you around to the side of the sofa, promptly pushing you down over the arm-rest so your face meets the cushions you were both just sitting on. He pulls your pants down your legs and helps you step out of them, dropping down to his knees and kneading at your thighs with a guttural moan.

“Gonna make you forget all about him, y/n,” he says. “Make you feel so good you won’t even remember his name.”

“Please,” you gasp, feeling his teeth sink into your ass. “So-... fucking good to me…”

He adjusts the position of your legs, bumping them apart until he can settle on his knees between them. His nose drags against the crease between the top of your thigh and the bottom of your ass, his lips trailing kisses all the way from the outside of your leg to where your pussy is throbbing for him. He skips over it, though, nipping and licking at the back of your other thigh, until you’re rocking your hips back to try and push him into your core.

“Be a good girl,” he chuckles, thumbing over the wet-patch in your panties. “I’m gonna look after you. I promise.”

His tongue meets your wetness just a moment after, dragging over the fabric and making you whimper. Your hands scramble to clutch onto something, one grabbing the edge of the seat cushion and the other balling into a fist. 

“Fuck, Cheol,” you hiss, feeling the heat from his mouth all over you. “Please – I need it. I need you.”

“Shh,” he says. You can feel his lips twist into a smile. God, you wish you could see him right now. “I’ve got you.”

When exactly his fingers tucked themselves under the waistband of your underwear, you’re not sure: all you know is that one minute, he’s breathing in your scent through the seat of your panties, and the next he’s yanking them down your legs and diving into your cunt like it’s his last meal on death-row. The sheer force of his hands gripping your thighs and his head burying itself between them makes you stumble forwards, the couch groaning as it shifts against the laminate flooring, and you cry out a wet sob of his name.

Who were you kidding, before, when you thought that this wasn’t going to go anywhere tonight?

The build-up to this started the second you told him about the date a week and a half ago.

But you can’t think about the mediocre pasta dish you ate this evening, or the moron who sat across from you at the table who kept checking his phone and glancing over your shoulder. You can’t think about how many times he went to the bathroom after receiving a text, or how he came back grinning cockily before he sat back down. 

All you can think about is how deep Seungcheol’s tongue fucks into you. How he fucking slurps all the wetness your pussy can give him, how he groans and moans and chuckles every time he shifts his head forward and flicks the muscle over your clit. Your head is spinning and your eyes begin smarting at the corners when his nails on one hand dig harshly into the fat at the top of your thigh. It stings, but it feels so fucking good. Your knees are weak, you’re about to bite clean through your lip in an attempt to be respectful to Seungcheol’s neighbours, and your knuckles are sore from the force with which your fist is clenched. 

Lord, he’s good.

“Don’t hold back,” he gasps, pulling away from you, a string of his own spit and your arousal still connecting him to your pussy. “C’mon, babe. I can feel you’re close.”

The loss of his mouth genuinely feels like the end of the world and you could buckle, in this moment. But he’s done this on purpose: he always does. He knows you. He knows the sounds you make and the way your body moves when you’re tantalisingly on the edge of your climax. His thumbs rub circles into your thighs and you just know he’s got the most obnoxious, insufferable grin on his face behind you while he does it: you can picture it, so perfectly. So easily. 

The orgasm you didn’t quite reach starts to ebb away from you and you give a grumble of frustration, pushing up onto your palms to turn around and look at him.

“You’re such a bastard, Cheol,” you hiss, and he grins back at you, his lips swollen and shiny as he licks over them.

“Get that pretty face back down, baby. I’m not done.”

It feels like a delightful punch in the gut, so you do. You drop back down onto your elbows, feeling him shift his position but you can’t see to what; his body heat never leaves yours even when his hands aren’t on you anymore, so you know he hasn’t stood up or gone far. It’s only when you clear your throat that you feel him again. Sat down with his back to the couch, between your thighs, nosing at your clit to get you worked up all over again: his fingers trail over your folds, collecting your arousal, spreading your lips and tonguing between them. You whine for him, keening and confused but overwhelmed at the stark shift from before. How he touches your pussy like it’s the first time, like it’s the last. 

He presses one long finger inside you, free hand pushing your hips into just the right position that he can suck your clit into his mouth. You feel yourself grinding down against his hand, begging him for more without having the words to ask for it, but Seungcheol doesn’t need to be asked. It’s intuitive to him. Eating you out could well be his day job. Another finger joins the first and he pumps them in and out of you at a pace you adore, his tongue flicking precisely over the bud in his mouth.

Your disappointingly lost orgasm from before starts to creep up on you again, and you know he knows it too. But this time, he doesn’t slow. This time, he doesn’t stop. He hums in the back of his throat: it’s permission, you realise, to come undone; burying your face further into the cushions, you let out a muffled series of expletives, sobs, moans of his name. You tumble over the edge with a broken cry, fingers curling into the couch cushions, and he only pulls away when your knees actually give out.

His strong frame is the only thing still holding you up by the time you’ve stopped twitching through the aftershocks, remembering how it feels to have full lungs and a working pair of eyes. You roll your head to the side as he slips out from beneath you, immediately sliding his arm around your waist and leaning over you to keep you steady. Through the material of his shorts, you can feel his hard-on poking at your ass: the fact that you’re this fucked and he hasn’t put his cock inside you yet makes your eyes water.

“Okay?” he asks, pressing tender kisses down the length of your spine. You just breathe, nodding with difficulty owed to your current position and the way all your muscles suddenly feel a hundred times heavier than normal. “Talk to me, sweetheart. You okay?”

“M’okay,” you say. “Just… gimme a sec…”

He keeps pressing his lips all over your back, hands rubbing soothing circles on your hips as you fully recover. You nod again when you’re a little more communicative, pushing up onto your elbows once more.

“Said I’d look after you,” he says. “And you were so good for me.”

“Yeah?” you ask, swallowing hard as you twist your spine uncomfortably to look back at him. Fuck it, maybe he’s the most gorgeous man you’ve ever seen. Is that some great secret? Is it such a crime?

“You always are, baby.”

He looks down at you again: at the shape of your body, bent so crudely over the arm of his couch. At your messed-up hair, your smeared makeup, your soft, dewy eyes. He bites his bottom lip, swallowing hard, running a finger from between your shoulder-blades all the way down towards your ass.

“Can I?” he asks, pushing his hips against you again, your still-soaked pussy smearing arousal all over the front of his shorts where it meets them. 

“Please,” you nod, shifting your legs slightly to try and get more comfortable. He drops his shorts in a matter of seconds, cock springing free from their confines. It’s thick and veiny, leaking in his palm as he strokes it, one hand coming back to rest on your hip.

“Fuck, babe,” he sighs. “You’re doing so good.”

The head feels delicious against your swollen cunt and you gasp at the pressure of him sliding through your folds, leisurely lubing himself up with your arousal. It glides over your clit and you can’t contain the slight hiss that escapes you. He starts to say something, his voice just audible to you where you’re propped, but for some reason he stops short, and you don’t quite hear him anyway. There’s not enough time to dwell on it though: your eyelashes flutter closed when he prods at your entrance, pushing into you with hardly any resistance at all, and his unstarted, unfinished sentence is forgotten.

It’s still a stretch to take him and he eases himself deeper until his hips are pressed fully against your ass. He rests there for a moment, letting you adjust, letting your body mould to the shape of his own, and it’s only when you reach back with one hand to gently nudge against his wrist to give an okay that he starts to move.

“Good girl,” he says, quieter this time. Like he’s distracted. Like he’s contemplating. But you don’t ask, because you don’t really want to know: every drag of his cock against your walls feels like fireworks bursting over every inch of your skin, like being engulfed in flame, and nothing could take you out of how electric you feel. “Taking me so, so well.”

His hips start to thrust against you quicker, snapping so his cock buries itself deep but mercilessly quickly into your pussy. It’s only a matter of minutes until you’re clenching around him and when you do, Seungcheol – who you noticed early on into your relationship was one of the most vocal men you’d ever had in the bedroom – stops holding back the sounds you think back to when it’s just you and your trusty vibrator against the world. You swear that half the reason your sexual chemistry with him is so unrivalled is because of how loud you can both get.

You don’t know how long he’s fucking you for, sweat beading over both of your bodies and leaving you slick all over. What you do know, though, is that when he bends down over you, supported by one hand bracing his weight against the cushion by our head, he’s close. 

He isn’t groaning and grunting anymore. He’s whining. So agonisingly hard and so painfully wound up that he could snap. His voice is little more than a whimper in your ear when his lips ghost over the shell of it, thrusts slowing as he tries to stave off his high just a little bit longer.

“Wanna drown in this pussy,” he says, eyes squeezed shut, jaw falling slack as you spasm around his length again. “Shit – I love y-... love this… love this so much-...”

And this time, you fucking notice.

This time, you hear him. You know what he said before, now. When you didn’t care, when you just wanted him to fill you up, when you just wanted to have him pound into you until your brain disconnected from failed romances and shitty dating apps and people who weren’t him. Because he started to say it then, too – started to say I love y–

And this time… you say it, back. 

“I love you too, Cheol.”

Jesus, fuck.

Loving Choi Seungcheol is the easiest thing in the world.

He freezes, buried inside you all the way to the hilt, a bead of sweat running down the bridge of his nose and hanging onto the tip for dear life. His eyes shoot open, his head turns, and you meet his gaze by turning your own. He’s feeling everything. All at once. So are you. Arousal and need and fear – God, so much fucking fear – but love. Adoration, affection, endearment, devotion – shit, he feels it all, and it’s written in every line of his face, and when his lips move into a smile, when the corners of his eyes crease, when he lets it wash over him, it feels better than any orgasm he’ll have for the rest of his life.

Even the one that explodes through him when you start to grind yourself back on his cock and he lets go, fingers scrabbling to hold your hand, lips finding home on the back of your shoulder. He paints your insides with his cum, fucks it into you for as long as he can physically withstand. You don’t even have it in you to chase another climax of your own, too blissed out in the relief of your own feelings to feel inclined to try. 

So, maybe there’s a reason you kept accepting dates with men you knew you weren’t compatible with. 

Maybe there’s a reason you didn’t give those other people a real chance.

Maybe there’s a reason you always found yourself looking forward to the end of every night having dinner with a stranger.

Because all the roads lead you here. Because it’s easy being here – it’s where you belong.

He stays sheathed inside you for a little while longer, pressing kisses everywhere his lips can reach before he has to pull his softening cock from its home between your legs. You lament at the feeling of emptiness, even as his strong arms wrap around your waist and pull you upright for the first time in so long that your legs feel like jelly. It’s okay, though. He holds you against his chest, burying his head into your neck – there’s no way you’re going to fall.

(At least, no more than you already have.)

“I’ll give you everything,” he whispers to you, moving your hair out the way so he can press small, doting kisses to the line of your jaw. “I can give it to you. I was a fucking idiot before – I’ll give you everything I have. I don’t know if I can be perfect but anything you want–...”

“I just want you, Cheol,” you tell him. “Everything – screw all that. I just want you.”

“Be with me?” he asks. You nod, feeling him light up in a smile for the hundredth time tonight. Even though you can’t see it, you’re sure it’s as blindingly beautiful as the first smile he sent your way, all those years ago. (It was Joshua’s birthday. You remember that, now.) And the second. And every damn time since. “Forever, this time.”

“Forever, this time,” you agree.

Because spending forever with the man who lifts you into his arms and carries you towards his shower, so you can clean down and get ready for bed? Right now, it sounds so –

But everything with Seungcheol has always been easy. Easier than with anyone else.

thank u so much for reading! likes, reblogs, comments + feedback are all always so appreciated<3

[wanderingxiao]

-Claiming-

NSFW, 18+ only Plz~

Summary: a few vendors are at Wangshu Inn hoping to sell their goods. You decide to go down and have a look. Xiao is quietly watching you atop his spot at Wangshu Inn. A foreign feeling comes to his chest seeing another man touch you. What is this feeling?

Pairing: Xiao x Female Reader

Warning: jealous/possessive Xiao, lots of lewd biting, little bit of blood, unprotected sex, and some swearing. (This is like… so much smut w/ fluff)

Word Count: 6K (again, how tf is it so long?!)

Enjoy~

Sharp inhuman ears could hear the sounds of your beautiful and pure laughter from afar. It put the yaksha’s stony heart at ease knowing that you were safe and sound, but it also gripped it like a vice whenever he found out that another man was the cause of your laughter. His perch on Wangshu Inn gave him a perfect view down below, where you were talking to a rather tall man about some of the items he was selling in his booth. Your smile was directed towards him, his hands coming slightly behind your back to urge you to look closer at the items he had to offer. Your smile had only faltered in the slightest, your discomfort clear from your body language. The yaksha did not take too kindly to this gesture. He began to feel a foreign feeling bubble in his chest, it was a feeling he did not appreciate and did not know how to get rid of. He teleported down to the venue area of Wangshu Inn, quickly approaching you and the vendor.

“Hey.” Xiao was quick to approach you and the mysterious man, his yellow slitted eyes glaring harshly at the hand that was on your shoulder. You turned to give a soft smile to Xiao, moving slightly in order to get the man’s hand off you.  “Oh, Xiao! I wasn’t expecting to see you down here, what a pleasant surprise. Please excuse me, sir.” You stepped out of the man’s booth and came beside your lover, your soft hands cupping his cheek to place a gentle kiss on his smooth skin. His cheeks blossomed into a light pink, averting his gaze quickly from you to the plains of Liyue, his expression clearly flustered. “What are you doing down here? I thought you didn’t like human gatherings?” You had caught on quick to his out of character behavior and shot him a slightly worried look. His cheeks only became redder as you stared at him, awaiting an answer. “D-Don’t you humans know it’s rude to stare? I’m fine.”

“If you say so… Oh! Excuse me, sir!” He watched in disappointment as you flagged the man from the booth and resumed your merry conversation with him, now a bit more cautious about his overly friendly behavior. Your smile was absolutely radiant. He thought he would go blind if he continued to look at it, not that he minded be blinded by you anyways. His honey-amber eyes gazed quietly as you picked out some nice-looking fans, the paper folded and creased with expertly ease. The paint flawless. You pulled your wallet pouch out and started counting your mora. “Oh, it’s okay darlin’, just take them. It’s on me.” Xiao didn’t miss the way he slipped that little pet name so casually. Something you usually give between lovers. Or so he had heard. “Oh, are you sure? These fans are beautiful and very well crafted. I want to pay you for your work.” The man shook his head and patted your shoulder, only furthering the adeptus’ protectiveness. “It’s the least I could do for such a kind and beautiful woman.”

“Let’s go.” Xiao demanded, glaring at you as if to tell you he had had enough your social interaction with the vendor. You turned to him holding the two fans you got from the man and then looked around at the other booths. “Oh, you can go back up without me, I was going to go look at some more booths. I promise I’ll call your name if something goes wrong.” His eyes narrowed further towards you, a silent warning telling you that he wasn’t asking you, he was telling you to go with him. You were a bit puzzled by his sudden demanding behavior, but figured something must be wrong, so you bid the man a farewell and thanked him once more before going to Xiao with a soft sigh. “Okay, let’s go.” Without another word, he wrapped a strong arm around your waist, and teleported you both to his room at the inn that he only just started using because of you. Once arrived, you stepped out of his grasp and came in front of him. “Xiao? Is something the matter? You seem a bit off…”

“That guy. He was getting too close.” His answer struck you into silence, pretty much stunning you into place at the sheer realization that Xiao had gotten a bit jealous seeing the guy being so kind to you. You stifled a small giggle in front him, quickly stopping once you saw his serious face. “What is so humorous? Did I say something wrong?” You shook your head and gave him a small smile before running a hand through his hair slightly, making a blush creep up the yaksha’s pale features. Human affection was still so foreign to him, but you made everything feel so natural and easy for him. You certainly were bad for him. He might find himself craving your touch more often than he would like to admit. “No baby, it just sounds like a certain green-eyed monster was whispering things in your ear.”

“Green-eyed monster?” Xiao looked around the room with a confused expression, coming back to land on your gentle features. You could only laugh again. He never did understand the ways of humans very well. You were probably the hardest one of all. “It’s a saying. Basically, you were just jealous.” A look of disgust and utter disbelief washed over his pale face. He should have just left you down there if you were going to insult him! “Jealousy? How absurd for you to think adepti experience such pointless human emotions such as that.” You gave a small roll of your eyes and kissed his cheek. His cheeks darkened once more, embarrassed and annoyed by your affectionate actions. “Well… whatever the reason, you have nothing to worry about. I’m yours Xiao. I see only you.” The adeptus’ eyes shifted from your face to your chest, the gentle rise and fall of your chest making his brows furrow.

“That doesn’t mean people won’t try to sway your judgement or disregard your requests. Ah, wait, that’s… not what I meant…” The almighty adeptus rubbed the back of his neck and averted his gaze away from you, nervous about somehow offending you. Your judgement and love for him was strong, he knew you would never disregard him like that. “Humans can be despicable beings. They are bound to put you in danger.” You gave your lover a smile and moved your shirt to the side a little bit to expose your shoulder. Hearing the sound of clothing moving, he brought his gaze back to you quickly, blushing at the exposure of more of your smooth skin. “If you’re so worried about someone else trying to steal me away, then you can mark me if you’d like. A symbol that I’m taken, and I belong to you.” Xiao’s eyes widened upon your suggestion, his Adam’s apple bobbing as he took a thick gulp. His face had almost turned completely red at this point. Your smooth skin, your carefree smile, the gentle tone on your voice, it was beginning to make him feel all hot and tingly. “I’m yours, Xiao.”

Xiao remained silent; his body completely rigid, nervous to make the next move. His eyelids began to become heavy, only getting heavier as he took a hesitant step towards you. You weren’t scared or nervous in the slightest of him, he was your protector after all. He would always protect you. The pads of his gloved fingers reached out to lightly glide over your exposed flesh, his breathing slowly increasing. His hand came to grasp onto your shoulder lightly, holding your clothing out of the way for his face. You replaced your hands on his back, rubbing up and down his slightly exposed skin to ease his anxiety. A shaky breath fanned over your exposed skin, his mouth getting closer to your skin until his lips lightly pressed a kiss against your shoulder. The adeptus closed his eyes before taking a rather harsh bite into your shoulder, emitting a small wince of pain from your lips.

“X-Xiao.” Your voice called his name so sweetly despite your pain, he thought he was about to lose his mind. His non-occupied hand came behind you and tugged your body towards him, his teeth sinking deeper into your smooth flesh. He could taste the irony flavor of your blood on his tongue. From this alone he knew his mark was satisfactory. His teeth were removed from your shoulder, feathery lips peppering gentle kisses on your new mark. The innocent kisses he intended to give you became laced with need. His lips traveled up your neck, biting down lightly against your pulse point under your jaw before he got to work swirling his tongue over your skin and sucked on that spot. Your hands clung to his back, the warm and comforting feeling of his bare skin stirring a heat inside you. “Xiao… mph, what’re… you doing?”

“I’m sorry… I can’t… control myself.” He bit into your shoulder again, gentler this time, his hands moving from your shoulder and back to grab ahold of your waist, holding you closer to him. You submitted underneath his possessive actions, fingers curling around his dark evergreen locks. Your fingers threaded his hair, slightly calming down his erratically racing heart. A flush of blood rushed through his cheeks, adorning a light pink appearance to coat his skin. He pulled away, only to swoop back in and press his lips against yours. An intoxicating mixture of love, lust, and desire swarmed your mouth, the irony taste of your own blood coming to your taste buds. The adeptus’ hands slid their way up your waist further, his gloved hands gliding smoothly over your breasts. He pulled away briefly, staring intently into your eyes with his glowing amber orbs. “Is… Is it okay to continue?”

“Of course, Xiao.” Your affirmation made his once tense shoulders relax at the acceptance of his actions on your body. You gave him a confident smile and pressed your palm against his cheek lovingly. “You don’t need to ask every time you know? It’s not like we haven’t done this before.” Your lover averted his gaze from you, his hands finding yours before carefully pulling you to sit on the soft cushiony bed. He looked nervous. “I-I’m sorry… all of these… mortal things are still very perplexing and strange.” He watched closely as your head tilted in confusion at his confession. A worried look crossed through your eyes. “Do you dislike kissing me and having sex? If you aren’t comfortable we don’t have to-“

“No! That’s not it!” He gave you a firm glare before his eyes softened and looked down at his lap. His previous actions were unbecoming of a stone cold yaksha. To succumb himself to petty physical human desires such as sex. It bothered him how addicted he was becoming to you, and how vulnerable he had started to become. “I-I don’t dislike it… it’s…I’m weary… of how I let my guard down too much around you. It’s… dangerous.” His amber orbs observed the way your expression turned to one of worry at his words. It was clear that you were hesitant to continue or even touch him for that matter. He gave a conflicted sigh, raising a hand to his face before he gripped his dark evergreen hair. “My karma… your mortal life span, and the dangers I could possibly bring you. I-“

“Xiao.” He was quick to shut his mouth upon your gentle voice calling out his name. His hand lowered, heart rate increasing when you placed your hand in his. Your fingers pulled his chin slowly to make him look at you, a bright and unnerved smile appearing over your shy lips. “I would battle the archons and lose… if it means being with you. Nothing in this cruel world can pull me away from you. Let me shoulder your burden with yo-“ He cut you off with a firm rejection, brows furrowing deeply at the suggestion. You gave him a sympathetic look. “Xiao… I don’t mean to let me solely deal with your duties or take on all your karmic debt… what I mean is, let me be your rock. Let me be the stone in your soul that keeps you sane, that keeps the darkness at bay. And… come home to me and let me hold you and keep you safe from the corruption of nightmares. I love you, Xiao. I want to do this for you… as you always do for me.”

The vigilant yaksha was rendered speechless. Your heartfelt confession and plea to him made a deeper blush bloom over his pale cheeks, and the rapid beating of his heart hammer harder against his ribcage. Your smile was unwavering as you leaned closer to him, initiating that you wished to kiss him. Xiao obliged to your actions, meeting you halfway to press your lips together in a lovingly passionate kiss. He resumed his advances, gloved hands coming to slowly push you down against the bed before maneuvering them down to rest against your breasts. A sigh slipped into his mouth before he swallowed your sweet noises with his tongue. His hands groped your fleshy mounds, kneading them carefully. He broke the kiss to pant against your face, a flustered and loving look in his golden eyes.

“I’m going to continue.” You nodded your head to him, raising your arms to wrap around his neck and pull him in for another kiss. He reciprocated your actions, his body carefully shifting to place himself between your legs. One hand squeezed and groped your breasts while the other trailed down to lay his palm on the underside of your thigh, slowly sliding up until his hand firmly grasped your ass. He relished in the way you gave lustful sighs of bliss into his mouth, encouraging him to do more. Your hands intertwined into his dark evergreen locks, pulling him impossibly closer to attempt to meld together with him. Xiao pushed himself further towards you in response, his groin firmly being pressed against your crotch making him shudder at the friction against his shamefully hard length. “Xiao, I love you.”

“I know.” Your heart swelled at his loving response. He was a man of few words and had difficulties expressing his emotions. His actions reflected every emotion he was thinking. Love with the way he passionately kissed you and held your body. Desire with how his rough hands squeeze your curves so eagerly yet gentle. And lust, displayed by the way his hips rocked back and forth against yours to induce friction on where you both wanted to feel it the most. The grip on your ass tightened briefly, a groan rumbling through his toned chest. He removed his hands only to grab your waist firmly, pulling your hips to grind back against him. You gave him a quiet moan in response while he let out a sigh of bliss and relief. “Can I-… Uh, I’m… going to take your clothes off.”

“Go ahead, silly adeptus.” You jokingly teased at the way his words stammered while he was trying not to repetitively ask you permission but also being more assertive. He gave you a bit of a glare and flicked your forehead lightly before he replaced his hands back on your hips. He looked up at you again, making sure you were okay. You gave him a smile and a nod. Xiao took a short breath before he slid his hands up your shirt, the feeling of his rough gloved hands making you wiggle underneath him. “Xiao… please touch me.” He stopped his movements and looked at you with a straight face. His cheeks were lightly flushed, still embarrassed to be taking more initiative in such a sinful act and intimate act such as this. “I-I am touching you. Do you not like it? Where do you want me to touch you?”

“It feels good, but I want to feel your bare hands on me, please.” Oh, the way you asked so nice and sweet for him to touch you with his heavy hands. He couldn’t help but grant your wish. He removed his hands, a bashful expression across his face as he removed his gloves, showing off the black nails he had underneath with blunt crescent curves that simulated his true form. “I wish you would let me see your true form, Xiao. I bet it’s beautiful, just like you.” You swear you’ve never seen Xiao’s face a deeper shade of red than it was right now. His face was practically as red as a chili pepper. “D-Do you mortals ever know when to keep your mouth shut!” He averted his eyes quickly before he roughly pulled your shirt off out of embarrassment. You could only give a small giggle and look up at him with a gentle smile. “Then… make me shut up, Xiao.”

Xiao flinched at your words, shameful in the way your suggestive words made his cock jump with excitement. His golden eyes lowered to gaze at your chest covered by a curvy laced bra. The swells of your fleshy mounds had his mouth practically watering at the sight. He yearned to feel the softness of them in his sinful hands. You caught his staring and slyly started to pull the straps down, making him audibly swallow the saliva beginning to pool in his mouth. “I need you, Xiao.” He loved when you called out his name like that. He leaned down and reached behind your back, patiently and easily unclipping your bra to slide it off your shoulders. The cool air erected your sensitive buds, much to his pleasure. “So gorgeous…”

A small smile with a tint of pink washed over your own face as you reached out for his strong hands, placing one firmly against your breast. He squeezed his fingers and sighed in bliss, eyelids fluttering slightly as he struggled to keep himself composed while touching you so sinfully as he’d done before. The calloused fingertips of his rough hands glided along your skin before his fingers came to grasp around one of your nipples, his hungry eyes flickering up to watch your expression twist. He relished in the way you bit your lip when he gave it a gentle pinch. Your legs attempted to squeeze together, eyelids becoming heavier while you looked down at him touching you so nicely. “Mmm, Xiao…” He continued his actions swiftly, rolling the hardened bud between his index and thumb before he lowered to your unoccupied breast, hot breath fanning over your skin. You had to look away due to the intense eye contact he insisted on making while his tongue swirled lewdly over the hardened bud. “Look at me, (Y/N).”

“Hah, mmmm, e-embarrassing… Xiao.” You looked back down to him, his eyes staring intently into yours. You could clearly see the way his tongue flicked back and forth against your nipple, all while maintaining his lewd eye contact with you. Archons, having you watch him pleasure you was such a turn on for him. The free hand he had he pressed against your clothed core. The redness of his cheeks on increased when your back arched against him, your eyes fluttering closed to moan for him. “Moan my name more, please.” The Adeptus wrapped his lips around your nipple, sucking lightly on the sensitive bud before he became rougher in his movements. The hand against your pussy was now tugging harshly on your clothing, desperately trying to get it off without taking his attention off your chest. His hips bucked lightly against yours, larger for some kind of friction. “Xiao, baby, take it off, please.”

The adeptus released an excited groan, grabbing the hem of your pants and pulling down both your bottoms completely. You were now left completely bare in front of him. Exposed for his eyes only. It must have been some blessing from Rex Lapis himself for him to gift Xiao with someone as understanding, patient, loving, and beautiful as you. Every scarred imperfection, curve or stretch mark, blemish, or freckle. Every part of you was perfect to him. Your eyes gazed at him longingly and he almost couldn’t control the way his hands grasp at your thighs, pulling them closer towards his thin frame. His mouth popped off your erected bud, his hands now leaving your chest completely to replace lower and focus on an a more sensitive area.

“Hah… I can smell how aroused you are.” The light pants that left his mouth met your skin in a breath of sinful heat. His eyes lowered to carefully watch as his fingers slid past the curls of hair outlining your nether regions to slide his digits along your slick folds. Your back arched into the adeptus’ still somewhat inexperienced touch, breathing a sigh of pure bliss at the feather light touch he gave. “It’s warm and wet… do you want my fingers?” His question made your head spin with desire, your lip catching between your teeth before you gave him a small nod. His other hand came to cup your cheek, pulling you forward to kiss him while slowly sliding his index finger inside. A whiny moan was swallowed by the adeptus, his slender digits engulfed by the searing heat of your gummy and smooth walls. “I-Is it okay for you, (Y/N)? It doesn’t hurt, does it?”

“N-No, Xiao… it feels good… you can do more.”  Your lips vibrated against his own as you voiced your need for him to continue. His golden irises shimmered in the lowly sunlit room, his eyelids heavy and droopy over the hungry gaze he laid into you. A flutter of his lashes and his lips were on yours again, warm palms sliding to run in your hair. His middle finger glided easily into your slippery core, your slickened arousal making his job much easier. His fingers curled upwards, massaging your walls while he pumped his fingers back and forth at a slow pace. A blissful arch graced your back once more as you breathed out a shaky moan. The feeling of his knuckles bumping against your core could only stimulate you more. “Xiao, hah, Xiao please, hmm…”

Not a word was released from the smooth plumpness of the adeptus’ lips. His mouth lowered to your cheek, peppering kisses along your cheek, and cascading down your jaw. The rhythm of his fingers increased; the arousal trapped within his pants pressing painfully against the breathy fabric oh his pants. His tongue came to glide along the delicate skin of your pulse point beneath your mandible, sharpened canines hungry for a taste of you again. Indulging in his selfish desires of claiming you as his own, his teeth sunk into your neck lucidly, the pace of his fingers becoming harsher and quicker. Sloppy wet sounds gushed from your nether regions and fell upon your flushed ears. Uncontrollable moans falling from your throat to grace his inhuman ears.

“Ahh! Xiao!” The tips of his slender fingers jutted against your sweet spot, curling so deliciously to the point your knees began to shake. His thumb came to search messily for your excited bundle of nerves, easily finding your stimulated clit in mere seconds. His teeth sunk deeper, tongue lewdly flicking over your skin and lapping any traces of blood that threaten to bead up on your lovely skin. Any pain or discomfort from his teeth was swallowed by the sheer overstimulated pleasure you were receiving from him. “It’s too much! It’s too much!” Your body jerked against him, legs flailing beside his hips while he struggled to maintain his claim on your neck. He finally released your neck and removed his fingers out of your aching insides. “Hah… I… want to… do it right now.”

“Xiao please… hah, claim me.” Your warm nimble fingers reached down, running your palm along the tent in his pants before forcing your hand up his tight white shirt. The feeling of his toned abdomen made your lip catch between your teeth, relishing in the sculpted tone your lover held. As impatience settled deeper into Xiao’s bones, he hurriedly removed his shirt and religious items he wore to fend off evil that dared to sink its claws deeper into him. The clambering of his dark violet boots accented in glamorous jade echoed the room as they fell to the floor. The baggy pants that normally adorned his waist now scrunched slightly below his hips. He never liked to fully undress, wanting to be prepared for any emergency that may happen during intercourse. “I’m… going to claim you and make you mine, permanently. Is… that something that you intend to take responsibility for?”

You were confused by his question but looking at the anxious gaze in his eyes you had an idea of what he meant. The pads of your fingers lifted to graze his shoulder lightly, running your fingers along the jaded markings of his illuminated beast tattoo. “Yes.” Your tone held no waver in the slightest. The plague of anxiety or uncertainty was absent, making Xiao’s heart race with anticipation of sheer admiration for you. His Adam’s apple bobbed as he took a thick gulp, leaning his face down towards yours. “Okay, I’ll try… to be gentle with you.” One of his arms came to rest beside your head to hold himself up while the other reached down to push his underwear down. The piercing gaze of his golden sunlit eyes never faltered from yours, the shaky breathing of his lungs fanning over your face once he freed his hardened length. “I’ll do it now. Is it okay to continue?”

“I told you, Xiao…” Your hands moved to hold his smooth and warm cheeks, your fingers lightly tucking some of his dark evergreen locks behind his ear. With a smile and a peck on the lips, you reassured him of your resolve once more. “You don’t have to ask if I’ll be yours… I already am, and I always will be.” The adeptus’ face twisted into an expression you’d never seen before. An expression of pure love and happiness. The smile that graced his typical frowning lips warmed your heart and caused butterflies to spread throughout your stomach. He pressed his forehead against yours, piercing eyes staring intently into yours. The nudge of his sticky cock head bumped against your folds, giving you a silent warning before he penetrated your eager insides. “Keep your eyes on me… and don’t look away.”

“Y-Yes, Xiao…” That was easier said than done. Just at the sheer touch of Xiao’s sinful heat pressed against your inviting cunt was more than enough to have your eyes rolling back in anticipation. Your breath mixed with your lovers, tingles of desire buzzing around your mind as you felt a pressure applying to your entrance. Xiao’s gaze was unwavering and lovingly intense, almost as if he was trying to practically see through you. With the last bit of pressure, he had slowly pushed the head of his cock inside. A moan slipped past your lips, eyelids drooping slightly at the blissful stretch that surrounded your nether regions. Xiao only sighed out sexily, pushing further to let his sinful length be engulfed by your gooey heat. “Xiao, hmm, I love you.”

His only response was to grab your face and smash his lips against yours in a messy kiss, his tongue invading your mouth dominantly while his pelvis pressed against yours in an eager attempt to get as deep as he could. A low groan caught in his throat, hips lolling back only to come and meet yours once again to connect your drooling sexes. Your hands came to his back, clinging to the rippled muscles on his back. The nails of your delicate fingers pierced his pale skin, forcing a painful yet satisfied grunt out of the adeptus while he continued to melt your tongue with his own. His hips rolled into yours slowly, the low and wet sounds of your sexes colliding was quiet, accompanied by the occasional creek of the mattress in his small inn room.

“Faster, please Xiao…” You parted the kiss, pleading softly to speed up the sinful rhythm of his lust. Xiao obliged by your naughty wishes; his face so close to yours while the speed of his vivid thrusts has your mind in a haze. Your back arched, nails digging deeper into his back at the new pace he chose. He could feel your hot moans against his ear, his own face heating up as he could only feel his cock get harder and twitch slightly at the feeling and sound of your pleasure filled noises. “Ngh, I-I feel good… hah, do you feel good too?” You couldn’t form a complete sentence, submitting completely under his overpowering thrusts. Xiao’s hands removed from your face, propping himself up on the bed before he scoots his knees forward. His thighs pressed against yours, pushing your legs more in the air while he practically straddled you. His hands found your waist, holding firmly before he started to thrust harder, moaning out your name. “F-Fuck, (Y/N)… I can’t… control myself, hah.”

Xiao looked absolutely breath-taking like this. His evergreen bangs were hanging loosely from the slender frame of his face. A rosy blush coated his smooth skin, the plush softness of his lips swollen from his hunger to mark up every bit of your body with him and him only. The small bit of blood smeared over his lips was almost unnoticeable. Through his heavy and sexy pants of uncontrollable bliss you could clearly see the shimmer of his white fangs, sharp and forever wanting to be embedded into your flesh. The possessive look in the adeptus’ eyes only grew heavier once he realized how intently you were starting to stare at him. Your eyes gazing up at him with lust and utter adoration making his stomach twist while his heart hammered against the strong bones of his ribcage.

Your appreciation for Xiao’s beauty was interrupted at a sudden harsh thrust into your core, hitting that heavenly spot inside that made stars appear in your vision. “Ahh! Xiao! R-Right there, it’s—oh my god, Xiao!” Xiao groaned in response to your pleas to keep hitting that generously pleasurable spot inside, his rough hands pulling your mortal body back against him as he thrust his length as deep as he could. His golden eyes narrowed gazing at your marked up skin under his teeth. Would now be a good time? No, not yet he wanted you to cum when he permanently engraved his teeth into you to place a possessive mark on your body. A low and husky growl erupted from his chest, his muscles rippling under intense emotions feeling you tighten around him. “Sh-Shit I can’t… hah, can’t hold it anymore…”

“Xiao, Xiao, I’m cumming… I’m- hmm! I’m cumming!” The harsh rhythm of his hips crescendoed into loud and lewd slaps of skin, more grotesquely wet noises coming from your sexes colliding repeatedly. The bed started to whine underneath the intense shifting of weight, the headboard smashing against the wall underneath Xiao’s erratic thrusts. The stench of sex filled the adeptus’ sharp nose, his eyes rolling back at the way you tightened around him so blissfully. Your head threw back into the sheets with a loud moan as a hot wave of bliss washed over your body. The uncomfortable knot in your abdomen snapping to release your essence all over Xiao’s cock. A gooey white ring circled Xiao’s length, your release pushing him over the edge. He lunged forward, biting the space between your neck and shoulder harshly when he came. A dark aura surrounded him, his teeth sinking deeper and deeper the more he felt his cum pump inside your warm welcoming insides. “XIAO!”

He hated the painful way you called out his name when he was marking you. He knew it hurt you, but he promised this would be the only time he would ever hurt you. The irony metallic taste of your blood touched his tongue, savoring the sweet way it tasted against his inhuman tongue. A soft cry passed your lips, whimpering in pain and pleasure. The way his tip twitched with his release made your legs start to shake, generously overstimulated by his cum filling your now sloppy insides. Finally, his cock became soft, sharp fangs removing from your neck to show the dark evergreen mist flowing around your new mark. Xiao was shamelessly pleased with his mark on you, the wound scarring almost immediately to show that you belonged to him. He was painfully selfish when it came to you. You were his happiness, and he’d be damned if anyone were to try to take you away from him.

“Xiao… T-That… really hurt.” Reality of the current situation came back to him, red blossoming over his pale cheeks immediately as he realized he had only been thinking of himself in that moment. He pulled out slowly and rose one of his rough hands to gently stroke your cheek. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to hurt you. But you agreed to be mine so… I-I gave you a mark. Mortals, gods, and other adepti can… c-can tell you’re mine through this.” His voice was calm and soothing, yet also sorrow-filled at the reminder of having to inflict this pain on you. To his surprise, you only gave him an understanding smile in return, leaning up weakly to peck his lips tiredly. “I see… thank you, Xiao. I love you.”

“I… I-“ You could tell he was struggling with expressing his affections through words. Xiao was an individual who showed his affection and trust by letting you near him. His tendencies to avoid mortal or heavenly contact was obvious. He secluded himself to focus on his duties and not burden others by his presence alone. Your eyes focused on his rosy cheeks, red in embarrassment, golden irises shifting from different spots on the bed in discomfort. He wanted to say it. He wanted to say those three words that he knew you wanted to hear. To confirm to you that he did in fact have a heart and it was absolutely overflowing with love, all for you. With a thick gulp of the saliva gathering in his mouth, he opened his mouth only to be stopped by your finger against his lips. “Shh, you don’t have to force yourself to say it, Xiao. I know you love me. Just being with me is enough to show that.”

Xiao was silent for a moment, nervous eyes finally coming to meet yours. He searched your gaze for any signs of distrust, any sign that you were lying just for his sake. No traces of a lie lingered anywhere in the loving gaze you set upon him. You truly meant every word you said. A soft sigh left his swollen lips, his body shifting to come and lay his head against the soft swell of your breasts. His arms circled your waist, pulling you impossibly closer to him. You smiled and began to run your fingers through his dark evergreen hair, soothing him into a relaxing state of domestic bliss. The sound of your heartbeat calmed him, and he could feel any burdens of his karmic debt vanishing from his veins in your comfort. Maybe he can start relying on you more when his burdens pile too high. He was still learning how to be better for you and give you everything you deserve. As the sunset on another day drawing to a close, the adeptus whispered to you, oh so quietly, his overwhelming feelings for you that he would one day hope to be brave enough to say aloud.

“…I love you too…”

“I’m far from human. I can’t make much of human emotions.”

-Xiao

[peachhcs]

it’s a forever kind of thing

hughes!sister x will smith au (samy + will)

while in san jose, samy and will realize they can’t stay away from each other and all it takes is a dinner out to get them back together

6k words

warnings: 18+!!, smut (but like halfway through), making out, hickeys, oral (m + f receiving), unprotected sex (she’s on the pill), please read at your own risk!

GUYS! it’s here!! the long awaited fic where samy and will get back together! instead of breaking it into two, i made it one long fic, so halfway through is when they have sex, so if you don’t wanna read that u can skip over it, but i decided to just put it all in one. this took me forever to write lowkey bc i never knew how to write it, but i like how this came out so i hope you guys too!! yay!! get excited for happy will and samy coming your way again!

au masterlist

the san jose heat wasn't a joke. any room in the apartment felt like it was 100° and it didn't help that they were trying to unpack boxes and build things in the high temperatures. samy was on the floor trying to figure out how to put together a shelf while also wiping the beads of sweat running down her forehead every five seconds. even the five different box fans scattered around the apartment didn't do anyone justice.

somewhere further in was will helping his mom put the bed together while grace did her best to hang frames in one of the hallways. the four of them were working hard, but the heat was quickly getting to everyone and what should've been a four hour job turned into almost six hours by now.

"what the fuck," samy mumbled to herself, eyes bouncing between the directions and the pieces of wood that definitely didn't fit together even though they were supposed to.

will should've recruited her brothers to fly over since they were way better at building things than she could ever be. whatever the directions were trying to tell her were not making any sense.

she was really tempted to call luke and bug him about it, but a different voice startled her a bit before she even pulled her phone out.

will's gaze stuck to hers where he stood in the doorway, "need help?"

samy met his eyes, flushing under his stare and sweaty figure, "uh..i mean..i think i'm doing it right but for some reason it doesn't look like it," she admitted truthfully.

will took that as his cue to crouch down. samy slid him the paper and let him read it over incase she was just missing something entirely.

"well i think the first problem is that these aren't the same pieces in the picture," the blonde determined, eyes gazing at the wood.

"i fucking knew it! i knew they didn't go together!" the girl exclaimed in triumph because she'd been feeling stupid about that for thirty minutes.

"i don't need shelves anyway. they're stupid," will shrugged some while disregarding the paper onto the floor.

"yeah, just make your own or some shit," they shared a small laugh which was happening a lot more frequently since they got there.

things were..rocky still, but it wasn't as bad. they even sat next to each other on the plane even though neither of them really spoke. it was progress and that was what mattered anyway.

"i can't believe it's so hot. i feel like i'm dying," will slid further onto the ground where he spread himself out against the hardwood.

"you better get used to it. it's supposed to get even hotter next week," samy informed, slipping to will that she may have been looking at the weather for san jose for him

"ugh, don't tell me that. i'm not made for the heat," he pushed his curls away from his sweaty forehead, but samy sort of found the movement just the tiniest bit attractive.

both of their hair was way more frizzier than usual because of the crazy heat, but something about it made the brunette a bit weak in the knees seeing will like that.

"did you get the bed together at least?" the girl wondered, leaning back against her palms.

"mostly, yeah. mom's doing the finishing touch. i had to walk out of there before she like exploded at me," the hockey player laughed and then samy did too. they knew how colleen got because she always wanted everything to be perfect.

"hey, one bed down. that's a win."

"yeah, sure. it's a win if you don't count my mom snapping at me every five seconds," will rolled his eyes.

"the heat makes people cranky. i don't blame her. you're kind of hard to work with sometimes," samy shrugged and will's head snapped up.

"what does that mean?"

"i dunno. whatever you want it to mean," she hummed earning a playful groan from the boy beside her. she managed a small smile, lifting her gaze to the rest of the apartment.

the four of them got most of it decorated and it was actually coming out really well. it screamed will and samy knew it was because almost all the ideas were taken from the pinterest board she made for this exact occasion.

most of the apartment was thanks to samy. colleen always said she had an eye for designing.

the girl's gaze landed on a picture frame stuck up on a shelf that did get put together and hung up. she stared at it for a moment, trying to figure out who was in the photo because she'd never seen it before. it wasn't until a minute later that she realized it was a picture of her and will.

they looked a bit young. 17 or so? samy was in her high school soccer uniform with a large medal hanging off her neck and will hanging off her side. they had big, bright smiles across their lips and both of them held the number 1 on the fingers for the photo. samy had no clue when or who took that photo, but it brought another smile to her lips.

"who took that photo of us?" she let the question slip out. will finally sat back up, trying to see what photo was being asked about.

"the one up there?"

"yeah," samy pointed to the shelf.

"uh..i think my mom took it. you'd just won the state championship for your last high school game," will explained the backstory and suddenly, it all came back to the girl.

"samy!" the brunette spun around. she caught sight of her three brothers rushing towards her in pure excitement. luke got to her first as he picked her up and spun her around in a tight hold.

"i'm so proud of you, samy!" the curly-haired boy exclaimed.

"you did so great, squirt! congratulations!" jack and quinn hugged her next. samy beamed from ear to ear at all the praise while the emotions of her last high school game ever started coursing through her.

"you're a fucking state champion for the second year in a row! how fucking cool!" jack rambled on and said how there's gonna be competition on the mantle where their parents put their kids' most important trophies and medals.

samy sort of stopped listening to her brothers when she saw will pushing his way through with grace and his parents in tow. she sort of shoved jack away as she rushed to will. he opened his arms wide and they met in the middle win a similar hug that luke gave her.

"i'm so, so proud of you, hughesy," will hummed into her shoulder.

"i'm so glad you came," the girl grinned some more.

"i want a picture!" colleen said, her phone already out. will let samy go as he shuffled to her side. she leaned her head into him until their heads touched and then she stuck up her pointer finger to signal as number 1.

she must've been so caught up in the moment that samy forgot the picture was even taken. the memory made her smile because she had all of her important people at that game and that meant so much to her.

"wow, that feels so long ago," samy finally spoke again, bringing her knees to her chest.

"yeah, i know. we were so..oblivious back then," will let the words slip from his mouth as he watched the girl's reaction.

her body tensed up a bit because she knew what he was talking about—so oblivious to the feelings they had for each other and what was to come out of that and where it would lead them.

"yeah. we were," the brunette hummed out.

she thought about the conversation with gabe and ryan from last week. she knew that everything they said was true, she just hadn't chosen to believe it quite yet. plus, what if she was scared of what her heart was trying to tell her?

obviously, it had something to say if she was sitting in san jose helping her ex decorate his new apartment even after he broke her heart and she was supposed to hate him for it. where was the hate when they sat inches apart in the living room without a couch all while reminiscing on their younger years?

"when do you start preseason?" will changed the subject and samy refocused her attention on him.

"next week," the girl beamed a bit. she was excited for the new season knowing a national title was definitely in their future this year.

"wow, that's soon."

"i suppose so, yeah. when do you start?"

"next week," will said and it was hard to believe this whole nhl thing was actually happening.

it didn't even seem like a reality when they were kids and now will was living out his dream of playing for an nhl team.

"i don't know if i've said this..but.i am proud of you. really proud. you're gonna do great here," the air in the room shifted a bit. it felt bittersweet hearing samy say those things after will basically pushed her out of his life.

she'd always support him no matter what.

the boy's gaze softened out as he ducked his eyes, "thanks, samy. that means a lot coming from you."

"you really do deserve all of this. you've worked really hard for it," she nodded as if she was affirming her words.

will blushed, but he didn't do anything to hide it, "thanks for coming. i-i know things haven't been...and i know i can't keep saying it, but i really am sorry for hurting you. i thought i was saving you from hurt, but i did the opposite."

"thank you for saying that. i..i don't really know what our relationship will be or if it ever will go back to how it was before this, but..i'm willing to try," the two shared a smile.

"i know this is probably gonna be a crazy ask, but..since we only have one more night until you leave tomorrow, would you wanna..like..get dinner? just the two of us?" will dared to ask because he'd regret it more if he didn't ask and lose his chance at proving himself to her.

this time it was samy's turn to blush, "are you asking me on a date?"

"do you want it to be a date?" they held each other's gazes for a moment before samy slowly nodded.

"yeah, let's go to dinner together," she smiled and so did will.

"really?"

"yeah, i think it'd be fun."

so it was settled. will and samy were going on a date that could potentially fix everything between them or be a total shit show. they both secretly hoped for the former.

—

they decided on 7. samy came out of the guest room in a dress marcie packed away for her when she told her friend she was flying to san jose with will. marcie claimed it would be "this exact occasion" meaning the girl was also hoping they'd make up their differences on this trip.

it wasn't anything special. it went down to her ankles in a soft pink with embroidered roses down each side of the dress. samy paired it with some sandal wedges and maybe her hand shook she did her makeup, but that didn't matter because this felt like another grace period.

if it went well, then..who knows. if it went horribly, they'd never talk about it again and at least samy was leaving so they wouldn't have to face the awkwardness too much. again, both of them hoped for the former.

grace saw samy first when she walked into the kitchen. the older girl's expression slipped into a smirk as she nudged her brother's arm who's gaze wasn't on samy. however, when he did see the girl for the first time, his eyes were the size of the moon and he couldn't look away.

"too much?" samy wondered nervously. she didn't know how dressy they were getting, but based on will's button down and dress shorts, she decided it was the right option.

"no, no. you look..you look great," will gulped while grace didn't stop her little snicker.

"oh wow, what's the occasion?" colleen came into the room, a look of surprise on her features seeing will and samy so dressed up.

"we're going for dinner," the blonde explained to his mom.

"the two of you?" the older woman's eyebrows raised

"yeah. it won't be long," will said.

the look on colleen's face said everything she didn't except a little, "have fun then."

the two managed small smiles as will led samy out of the apartment. grace and colleen didn't say anything until the door closed and gentle smiles fell on their lips.

"i really hope it works out between them," mrs. smith hummed.

"oh, i think it will. he won't let her go again," grace said.

will and samy started up the street where they'd have to walk a few blocks to the restaurant they decided on. they didn't say much, but the silence was comforting. it felt like a first date all over again except they knew everything about one another already.

"this is weird, but like in a good way," samy finally spoke first.

will managed a light laugh, "what does that mean?"

"like..weird i didn't think i'd ever agree to this, but i'm glad i did?" it was hard to put into words for samy.

her heart told her one thing while her head said something completely different.

"well, i hope you're still glad by the end of the night," will said, their gazes meeting briefly.

samy thought he looked better than ever. his curls were the perfect amount of curl and whatever the dev camp did to him worked some wonders because..wow. not that samy could ever peel her eyes off him, she really couldn't now.

they made it the restaurant and samy got another perfect excuse to stare at will when he sat down across from her at their little table in a corner.

"this okay?" will wondered, meaning there they'd been sat.

"it's perfect. i like how cozy it feels," the brunette smiled. will did too because he knew how much samy liked the corner tables because he also knew she felt too open when they sat in the middle of the room.

they spent a bit of time looking over the menu when the waiter came over. she smiled at the two, "i really love your dress. it's beautiful," she said to samy.

"oh, thank you. i appreciate that," the younger girl beamed.

after ordering, samy and will got into a bit of small talk that slowly shifted into regular talk that shifted into what felt like how they used to talk before things happened.

"you ever think about what you'd do if you got injured or something and you couldn't play anymore and had to retire?" samy stirred her straw around her cup.

"yeah, all the time. that actually might be me and my parents biggest worry," will laughed lightly.

"what would you do?"

"probably be really sad for awhile, but i'd get better and try to find another hobby i could take on," the blonde shrugged.

"i remember when we were kids you always said you'd become a coach if you couldn't ever skate anymore," samy said softly and will's own expression softened at the idea of samy remembering that.

"i really can't picture my life without hockey," they shared a laugh.

"yeah that sounds like you. you're all in, but i get it. hockey's my family's whole life. i can't imagine life without it either," the soccer player hummed.

"i just know i'd be so upset if the one thing i dedicate my life to can't happen anymore. it'd honestly make me have an identity crisis," will frowned.

"i kind of feel the same way about soccer. i don't really know who i am outside of the sports i've grown up playing," samy laughed but more as to hide the small pain she felt at the idea of really not knowing who she was.

"well, i think you're really generous. you have a big heart and you don't ever back down from anything. you're great with kids and your love for everyone you meet is super contagious," will didn't miss a beat with that leaving the girl across from him in surprise.

her cheeks flushed an embarrassing red, "you're just saying that."

"i'm not. you're probably one of the best people i know."

the look in will's eyes told samy how serious he was being. she just disregarded his comments despite the pounding in her chest and her hot cheeks.

the two spent the entire rest of dinner lost in conversation. both of their hearts felt full when they made it back outside where the temperature finally felt a few degrees cooler.

"this was a lot of fun. i really enjoyed it," samy said to will, a deep, loving smile on her lips.

"i'm glad you had fun. i did too," the boy smiled back.

they stood in a beat of silence trying to figure out what the next move was. tension filled the air, but not an angry one that's been there for awhile. this tension was different. it was thick, but heavy with what seemed like love and lust.

"would it be crazy if i kissed you?" will's voice was small and a bit shaky when he asked.

his eyes were everywhere on the girl in front of him because he'd been inching touch her since she walked out in the dress clinging to her body. actually, he'd been thinking about this since last week when they were at his going away party.

"no. i don't think so," samy inched herself closer to the blonde. her eyes were also everywhere and her breath hitched when he laid a hand on her lip.

will looked at her for one last reassuring look that he could go all in. when samy nodded he took that opportunity. his lips were hard against hers and so was his hand on her hip.

they molded into one another like they never spent time apart. samy's hands found their respective places on will's chest and in his hair at the back of his head.

their steady breathing turned into heavy pants when they pulled away for a second. big smiles danced on both of their lips at the feeling of being pressed up against one another because it was a feeling they missed a lot.

"is this.." will's voice faded off because he didn't quite know what he was asking.

"it's okay. more than okay," samy nodded eagerly.

"maybe we should go back to my place?" the boy said because they were still on the sidewalk and people were walking by.

"yeah, right. of course," the girl nodded and they started back down the sidewalk to will's apartment.

the smiles on their lips were evident and they grew even bigger when their fingers slowly intertwined with one another. earlier samy's heart and head were in different places making her feel lost. right now, they were in the exact same place and she knew exactly what she was feeling: love.

because she'd always love will. even after he broke her heart. even after he did everything to prove to her he regretted everything he did. she loved him through and through and samy knew he felt the exact same way about her.

of course, that didn't mean her guard was broken down completely. there was still a lot of cracks to be repaired and that only came with time and more trust.

right now, though, none of that mattered when samy stumbled back into the apartment with will. it was dark since grace and mrs. smith headed back to the hotel room for the night because maybe they both knew the date would lead to something more.

will's lips were back on samy's as soon as the door was closed. he pushed her up against the hardwood as she reciprocated his actions, kissing his lips hard and running her hands through his now messy curls.

they were fully making out—hungry for each other's lips because they'd been apart for so long. samy's hands fumbled with the buttons of will's shirt in a desperate attempt to peel it off of him.

"i really missed you," will mumbled against her lips between the kissing. he felt the girl smile.

"i missed you too," she said as the blonde pulled her closer against his body.

his boner pressed against her lower stomach and it sent butterflies through the girl, especially when will's one hand moved to grab her ass. a noise escaped her lips right into will's mouth.

"is this okay?" the blonde asked, worried he was moving too fast.

"yes, it's perfect," samy started becoming breathless again. she pushed the rest of his shirt down his arms, exposing his entire torso. her eyes racked down his toned body, gripping slightly on the muscled arms.

"they've been working you good," the girl laughed a little making will blush.

"you think so?" he grinned, always loving samy's praise.

"mhm," her words got lost in her throat when she pulled the boy back to her lips.

they made out a bit longer until will's lips dropped further down. he kissed down her neck until getting to her collarbone and the top of her breasts. the blonde began sucking lightly and little moans finally escaped samy's lips at the feeling. her head hit the door, her grip hard on will's arms.

"fuck, will," samy moaned out, her sounds going straight to his dick still throbbing in his pants.

"missed this so much," the boy's voice was muffled against her skin. she laughed, tugging his curls which in turn made will suck harder.

"you're gonna get me in trouble with these," samy said knowing all the girls in the locker room would see them next week. all will did was shrug.

"good. they'll know who they came from," he looked up for a second and the look in his eyes held a certain type of possession in them.

"can i at least return the favor?" she's been dying to have her mouth on will's body since she saw those pictures of him at the bauer combine a few months ago.

"just keep them low so no one sees them," will said, standing back up with a little smirk on his face.

they switched positions so will was against the door and samy didn't waste any time placing her lips halfway down his stomach. immediately, will's head was against the door with his hands gripping the girl's arms. he really did miss her lips on him like this.

"jesus christ," he mumbled lowly, eyes closing in pleasure.

the girl's lips nipped and sucked every part of his skin. sometimes she'd give a little bite and will would have to restrain himself from tugging her hair. when she moved further down closer to his waistband the blonde nearly saw stars.

she didn't even have to touch him and he was falling apart for her. "oh, samy. fuck," his moans filled her with pride because she knew no one else could make will feel like this just from some little hickeys.

she stood back up and will's lust-filled gaze stuck to her. their lips met again in a more passionate kiss where will led her to the bedroom since the living room still had no couch. samy left her shoes and followed the blonde to the bed where she had one thing in her mind.

she went for his pants, tugging them down his legs and leaving him in just his underwear. will looked up at her with slightly heavy pants, his heart pounding but not because he was nervous. samy's eyes were on the bulge in his underwear, reaching forward to wrap her hand around it. will jumped from her delicate touch, jaw clenching.

he was hot and heavy and samy knew he was already ready for her. she liked how hard will always got just from making out where she barely even touched him.

"s-samy, please," will got out, desperate for anything more than her stroking him. his desperate tone made the brunette smile as she finally took him out of his underwear.

he was red all over and samy's mouth watered in anticipation. she leaned herself down, sticking her tongue out to slowly lick a stripe from the bottom up. will's hips immediately stuttered on the first touch.

"fuck."

samy grabbed ahold of him with her hand, her thumb swiping over the sensitive tip before plunging back down his length. will groaned out, gripping the bedsheets while his stomach clenched multiple times. finally, her mouth locked around him, going in deeper than ever making the blonde nearly scream.

"shit. shit," will instinctively bucked his hips up where samy placed one hand down so he couldn't move.

"gotta stay still, pretty boy," the nickname left her lips faster than she could stop it. it was music to will's ears though because he's missed hearing her call him that.

"i'm sorry. i'm sorry. feels so good," he mumbled out a bit incoherently. any straight thought was quickly leaving the hockey player's brain while the pleasure took over.

just for that, samy sucked him harder, using her hand to pump the part she couldn't fit in her mouth. will was on cloud 9. his head pushed back into the pillow while he did his best to keep himself from bucking up, but each little suck and scrape on his cock was making it harder and harder for him to stay still.

"fuck—i'm not gonna last. gonna make me cum," will got out when he forced his gaze back on the girl below him. the sight was to die for. samy was on her knees still in her dress, but her tits were practically spilling out of it along with the hickeys scattered across her chest.

she figured will wouldn't last long based on the way he kept twitching in her mouth. she didn't blame him though because her underwear were soaked all the way through at the sound of him begging to cum.

"uh, samy. fuck— please. wanna cum," his words jumbled together as his stomach clenched and the feeling continued building.

"come for me, will. it's okay," samy finally said and will let go. his hips bucked up, uncontrollable moans escaping his lips as he released his load into her mouth.

she took it all, swallowing it down until he was finished. she let go with a pop and will's dick fell back onto his stomach twitching still. samy grinned at him.

"f-fuck. i haven't..done that in so long," the blonde mumbled meaning he hasn't done anything with anyone since they broke up.

he pulled her down on top of him, going for her lips again where he could taste himself on her and some of her strawberry lipgloss. in between the kissing, will's fingers found the little zipper on the back of the dress. he slowly pulled it down where samy helped by taking her arms out of the straps and pushing it the rest of the way down her body until it pooled at her legs.

the hockey player's gaze glued itself to the matching set samy sported. her pretty pink lacey bra and hot pink thong matched her dress perfectly and will swore he felt his cock harden all over again.

"what is this?" will mumbled, eyes still glued to the underwear.

"what? my underwear?" samy laughed lightly.

"you're gonna fucking kill me," the blonde said making the brunette smile. she let will flip them over so she was on the bed now. he stared down at her, eyes filled with lust and love.

"gonna make you feel so good," he said with one finger hooking into the waistband of her thong.

"you better keep your word," samy teased him.

will's lips were on her a second later. he started just below her chest, kissing down her stomach in slightly wet kisses until he reached the waistband. he pushed the band aside, eyes glowing at the site of samy's already wet pussy.

"jesus. i haven't even done anything and you're this wet already?" his eyes briefly found hers and all samy could do was shrug.

"your moans were hot. what can i say?" as much as will tried to show his dominance, the twitch in his cock at her words said everything about how much control samy had no matter what.

will didn't waste another second attaching his lips. his grip was hard on her thighs as his tongue slowly explored her insides. her hands flew to his hair where she pulled and tugged hard when will found the perfect spots.

"mmm, fuck will. just like that," samy nodded, eyes closed and back arching off the bed the deeper he got.

"fuck you taste so good," the blonde said. he could do this forever if he could because there was no better taste or feeling than his girl and the way she harshly tugged at his curls.

her little moans and whimpers started getting to him again. will moved his hips against the mattress, desperate to find some relief in his already aching cock while he continued his attack on samy's beautiful pussy.

"will, i'm gonna cum," samy got out, that feeling quick to snap in her stomach because she too hasn't felt this in so long, so she wasn't gonna last at all.

"that's it, pretty girl. come for me," will encouraged and samy did just that.

she released right onto him in a loud moan, glad that they had the apartment all to themselves. when she was finished she met will's gaze where he licked his lips clean and beamed up at her.

"you're actually amazing," he hummed earning a little eye roll from the girl. she tugged him up to kiss his lips, also tasting herself on him. will pulled at her hips, their bodies pressing together until samy flipped them over again. she straddled his lap, the hockey player gazing up at her in a loopy grin.

"wanna fuck you," she said, hands running down his torso. he nodded, hands eagerly squeezing her thighs.

"yes, please. want you to ride me. haven't seen you on top in months," will was a mess making samy smile. she leaned back to stroke will's cock again, getting it ready for her.

"wait, fuck. i don't have any condoms," the blonde quickly realized that in the moving process he didn't buy any and he threw away the ones he had before so his mom didn't see them.

"it's okay. i'm on the pill and i trust you," samy said like it wasn't a big deal but will's eyes widened.

"a-are you sure?" he's dreamed about having sex without a condom, but he didn't think that would happen for another year or two.

"positive. do you trust me?" samy asked and the boy quickly nodded.

"of course i do. i-i just.." his voice faded.

"we don't have to if you're not comfortable. i was just offering it," samy noticed his shift, but will shook his head.

"no, no. i want to. i just.." his face blushed a hot red, "i probably won't last long at all," it felt embarrassing to say, but samy only smiled.

"it's okay. honestly, that's flattering of you to say," they shared a laugh and she felt will relax a bit more underneath her.

"as long as you're sure, i'm sure," will nodded more firmly this time.

the brunette giggled as she pushed her thong aside and started lining will up with her entrance. he slipped in almost immediately and both of their eyes closed at the feeling. he stretched her out, the pleasure outweighing the pain and will's hands carefully gripped samy's hips in an attempt to keep his hips still until he was all the way in.

"oh god. holy fuck," he stuttered, his cock already throbbing for a release.

samy smiled, carefully moving her hips when she felt ready. the pace started slow until will started matching her pace with little thrusts of her hips. they began moving at a more steady pace, the only sounds in the room were their skin slapping together.

"fuck, yeah. feels so good, will," samy moaned out, hands sprawled across his chest for leverage.

"you're so beautiful," the boy mumbled, eyes roaming everywhere across her body.

his hands grabbed handfuls of her ass, moaning out at the feeling of her in his hold. little beads of sweat littered their bodies and it wasn't just because of the 100° temperatures anymore.

"fuck samy. 'm so close. god, you're so beautiful. i love you. i love you," will's words jumbled together again into incoherent thoughts and sentences. samy blushed hearing him say i love you.

"gonna come for me will?" she said between her own pants.

"yeah, gonna cum. gonna cum so hard," he continued.

"me too, pretty boy. you feel so good," samy threw her head back. the way will's cock continuously pierced her open had her falling apart on top of him. the feeling she was familiar with built up in her stomach until finally snapping when will thrusted particularly hard.

she moaned out, her hips stuttering and her orgasm taking over. the feeling of her clenching around his length also sent will over the edge.

he thrusted up, spilling his load inside of her, more uncontrollable moans leaving his lips and his head digging into the pillow.

"fuck, fuck, fuck. oh, fuck," he thrusted one more time into her, the last few drops leaving his now throbbing cock. samy fell onto the bed beside him, their chests heaving in an attempt to catch their breaths.

"that was.."

"really great," will finished her sentence. they laid there staring at the ceiling for a few more moments until the blonde shifted his gaze over to her.

he suddenly worried what this meant now. especially because samy was leaving tomorrow to go back to michigan. she felt his gaze on her, so she turned her body into him, eyes on him as well.

"so.." the boy became shy, his voice fading off in fear that if he asked, samy would say that this was a one time thing and she didn't want him back after all.

"so.." she copied his tone, her finger tracing his shoulder.

"what now?" he dared to ask.

"you said you love me?" samy said, remembering will's confession through his pleasure a few minutes ago. she watched his cheeks heat up again, but he didn't look away.

"i do. i mean i always have," the blonde admitted because it was true. he loved the girl beside him a whole, whole lot.

"you really hurt me," samy stared at his arm, will's smile disappearing into a frown.

"i know," their voices were quiet now.

"it's not gonna be all perfect like it was before all of this happened, you know," she continued.

"i know."

"it's gonna take awhile for me to completely trust you again."

"i know."

samy met his gaze again. his eyes had never left hers and she could see the love hiding within them the more she stared at him.

"i love you, too, will," their smiles slowly started returning.

"i promise i won't hurt you. i can't lose you again and i know that now," will shifted so they laid facing each other. he reached his hand out to brush some hair away from her face.

"you never lost me. i was always there," samy smiled a little and will beamed, pulling her closer to him so they were nearly chest to chest.

"i wish you weren't leaving tomorrow," the sadness crept back in knowing they could've had so much more time.

"me neither, but maybe i can make something happen to fly out for your first game," the girl grinned, trying to keep the mood light.

"i'd really love that," will returned her contagious smile.

they spent the rest of the night wrapped in each other's arms, holding onto all the time they had left until samy left for michigan and their long distance continued. this time, samy definitely knew her heart and head were on the same page because each of them were quiet in her mind as she fell asleep in will's hold.

[holdmytesseract]

A Stroke Of Fate

☆ The Baby Fever AU ☆

Loki x Y/N

Summary: Life isn't always sunshine and rainbows. You and Loki learn that in a very hard way. A path you are forced to walk on, which puts your love, relationship and even marriage to the test.

Warnings: 18+! MAJOR TRIGGER WARNING! PROCEED WITH CAUTION! Angst, grief, sadness, loss, fights, mentions of injuries, pregnancy/pregnancy loss! trauma, misunderstandings, inappropriate touching - no rape, but it goes in that direction, violence? fluff! tiny bit of suggestive smut - blink and you'll miss it. Tell me if I missed something!

Word Count: 6k

a/n: This is most likely the saddest thing I have ever written - and it hurt me to the very core to do this to Y/N and Loki, but I had to. The idea was in my head for a long time. I fully blame 'Stay' by Rihanna and Mikky Echo.

Also, this isn't just another Baby Fever fic... This takes their story into a new direction - kind of...

Baby Fever Masterlist °☆• Loki Masterlist °☆• Masterlist

divider by @fictive-sl0th <3

Loki’s eyes widened in realisation; jaw slacking. He wasn't able to move a single muscle. All he could do was stare. Stare at the tiny, seemingly plain object laying inside his big palms.

Millions of thoughts ran through his head at lightning speed. The god's heart pounded violently against his ribcage. He tried to focus, but he couldn't. Too overwhelmed by the various emotions coursing through his veins.

But at last, he felt how the happiness finally took the upper hand and overweighed everything.

Tears started to pool in his oceanic blues; clouding his vision. And with the first tears falling from the corner of his eyes, Loki sunk to his knees on the bathroom floor; clutching the small object tightly against his chest; crying.

All he wanted was to get a towel from the little cabinet underneath the sink to clean up the mess two-year-old baby Narfi had made with his sippy cup - and now he was holding the future in his hands. Literally.

Loki had anticipated a lot... But certainly not to find a positive pregnancy test. Obviously, your pregnancy test; hidden in between the towels.

"Rogers!" Loki called after Cap, before he could step inside the elevator. The blond man's eyes lifted and landed on the god, who was literally jogging down the long hallway, with little Narfi on his arm.

"Have... Have you seen my wife?" He asked; tears still pricking his eyes. Steve raised an eyebrow and thoroughly scanned the prince's features. "Is everything alright, Laufeyson?" Loki nodded quickly; causing his raven locks to gently bounce against his shoulders. "More than alright, Rogers. Now have you seen my wife?" "Um, yes, I- I think she's in the training room, testing her new combat suit. At least that's what Y/N said earlier when we-" Loki slapped Steve's shoulder; interrupted him. "Thank you, Rogers." The god smiled at Steve and rushed past him; quickly pressing the button on the elevator.

Before the soldier could react, the metallic doors shut close in front of him.

Loki could barely contain his excitement. Something the little man on his arm noticed as well...

Narfi looked at his father with big ruby eyes. Sure, he didn't understand the situation, but the boy also didn't have to yet. He was still so young. Lifting a little blue hand, Narfi touched his father's cheek; feeling a tear against his tiny fingers. "Daddy?"

Loki smiled at his son. He adjusted the two-year-old on his arm and turned his head; kissing his palm and blew a raspberry against the skin - which caused Narfi to giggle and Loki to smile even wider. "Let's go, see mommy, yes?" He run his free hand through Narfi's short black curls; still fighting the tears. "See mama?" The god nodded; chuckling. "Yes, little man."

With a ding arrived the elevator on the 5th floor and the doors slid open. Loki stepped out and let Narfi stand on his own small two feet. Then the god squatted down and quickly fixed the boy's jumper. Today he wore the beige one with the dinosaurs on it - gifted to him by his uncle Scott. Narfi's forest green sweatpants needed adjustment, too, since they were still a little too big. After that was done, he stood up again and took Narfi by his hand. "Come one, buddy."

Together, they rounded the corner and entered the training room - well, rather small hall. It had everything an Avenger needed to prepare and train for missions.

Loki’s eyes immediately searched for you - and they found you quickly. You were standing on a mat; doing some stretches, launches and small jumps. Testing your new combat suit - like Steve said. If it weren't for all the Serotonin and Oxytocin coursing through his veins, he'd probably ravish you right then and there. Anyways, he was happy that no one was around...

Narfi was the one to announce your men's arrival. As soon as he saw you, he squealed out and ran as fast as his little legs carried him towards you.

"Mama!"

You immediately turned at the call of your child; seeing Narfi and Loki. You smiled and squatted down; ready to catch the boy. "Mama!" "Hey, sweetie!" You hugged him close and pressed a lingering kiss on his cheek. "Are you and daddy visiting me?" Your son nodded. "Uh.Huh." "Ohh, that's great." You ruffled his hair and stood up again to greet Loki.

"Hey, babe." You smiled and wrapped your arms around your husband's neck. "Hello, love." He placed his hands on your hips; pulling you closer. That was the moment you saw tears glistening in his eyes. He cried... You were of course immediately worried; your brows slanting. "Loki, why are you crying? What is-" He interrupted you with his lips on yours; kissing you with all the love he possessed for you.

Only Narfi's little tuck on his sweatpants was able to break the kiss. "Daddy! Narfi pway ball?" Both, yours and Loki's gaze followed Narfi's pointing. Loki chuckled; realising that the blue softball the boy always played with when he was with you or Loki laid only a few meters away from him. "Sure, buddy, go play."

Narfi ran away; giggling and started to kick the ball across the floor.

"Loki, what is it? You are crying, what's the matter?" Your husband smiled; thumbs tracing over your clothed hips. "I love your new suit." You couldn't help but smile as well, but still quite a bit confused. "Thank you, I... I thought it was time for a new one." "It fits you, my love. You look absolutely ravishing, if I might say so." You bit your lip; noticing the naughty, mischievous glint in his blue eyes. "Ahh, I see..." You giggled and pulled him into another kiss; not forgetting to cast an eye on your son now and then.

With a soft pop ended Loki the kiss - still smiling like a Cheshire cat. "But... You won't need this suit very much longer, right?" He whispered, and you could see how another tear rolled down his cheek.

And suddenly it fell like scales from your eyes. Your brain had quickly connected the dots.

You swallowed. "You... You found the-" "Pregnancy test, yes." Loki finished your sentence with a small sob. "B-But how? I thought I hid it so well..." The god chuckled; shaking his head. A tear dropped from his chin on his sweater. "Not good enough, my love. Narfi spilled water over the table with his sippy cup a-and I needed a towel, so..." You face-palmed yourself. "So you looked in the cupboard underneath the sink, of course. Silly me..." You giggled along Loki, who pulled you closer again.

"I assume you planned to surprise me. I apologise for ruining it." You shook your head; playing with the curls on the nape of his neck. "Indeed yes, but it's okay. It's been a surprise for you nevertheless..." Your husband shook his head - still in disbelief and with silent tears running down his cheeks. "I can't believe that this little joke of ours turned into reality so quick." "Well... I have been asking for it and challenged you, so..." A deep chuckle rumbled through Loki's chest. "Never challenge a half Frost Giant in spring to such things." "Yup, lesson learned," you giggled.

Your husband wrapped you up in a big hug then; holding you close, while you kissed his tears away. "No, honestly, darling... This is great," he whispered; gazing deeply into his eyes. Loki was positively radiating happiness - you could feel it. You nodded. "It is."

He kissed you once again; soft lips melting against yours.

You and Loki sat down on one of the benches then, which lined the wall beside the entrance; watching Narfi play and burn off energy. You had placed a hand on his thigh - which Loki had now wrapped up in his bigger hand.

"When did you take the test, love? And do you know how far along you are? I tried to figure it out myself, but we do way too much love making to do so." A snort, followed by a laugh slipped past your lips and you slapped his thigh. "Loki!" "What?" He asked; smiling mischievously and shrugged his shoulders. "It's the truth, is it not?" You just giggled, but nodded.

He wasn't wrong, after all.

"I took the test three days ago, but I have absolute no idea how far along I am. I'm gonna call my gynaecologist tomorrow and make an appointment." You smiled and squeezed his hand. "You could accompany me..." Loki gazed into your eyes and tuck a loose strand behind your ear. "I'd love to."

Just a few days later, you had your appointment at your gynaecologist's. Loki accompanied you. Ella was at school and Narfi with his auntie Nat. A white lie needed to be told to your best friend, since you didn't want to shout the good news from the rooftops yet.

The pregnancy test you took didn't lie to you. You were, in fact, pregnant again. Five weeks, said your gynaecologist, so it was new, fresh and vulnerable. You and Loki decided to tell it nobody yet. Not a single soul. Not even Frigga. And it turned out to be the right decision, because what happened only three weeks later was something you never thought would happen. At least to you...

"Are you sure you don't want to join us?" You asked Loki, while you stood in front of the mirror. The god was leaning against the wall of the bathroom behind you. He had his hair tied up into a bun and his hands buried in the pockets of his sweatpants. "No, thank you, darling. I'd rather stay here with the kids." You giggled and caught his gaze in the mirror. "Does that mean you prefer Ella's tea party over a night out?"

Loki couldn't help but smirk, "Oh, definitely." and join your laughter.

"Alright..." You started; lastly applying some perfume to complete your look. "I'll be going now." You turned to face your husband. Placing both hands on his chest, you leaned in to kiss him.

Loki nodded; pulling you closer by the belt around your waist. "Take care, alright? Please, by the love of the Norns, look after yourself and the little bean, yes?" You rubbed your palms across his pecs. "Of course, my love. I promise." You kissed him again and then left the bathroom. "And no alcohol!" You heard Loki calling after you. "I know, babe!" You giggled.

After you bid your goodbye to Ella and Narfi; giving them both a big smooch on the cheek, you met up with Nat and Jane to go out for a, well... small girl's night out.

The actual plan was to do a 'couple night's out' - but none of the boys wanted to join in and Pepper and Jane didn't have time in the end as well. Therefore it was just you, Nat and Wanda.

"No Loki?" asked Jane as you walked out of the building. "Nope... He preferred Ella's tea party." That had the three of you giggling. "Understandable," threw Nat in. "Ella's tea parties are the best."

You and the girls headed for your favourite bar; talked, danced and definitely had fun. It seemed like a perfect night. At that point, you not waisted one thought that it could turn some way somehow sour...

But it did. In the worst way possible. A harmless night, which turned into a nightmare.

Shaky hands reached for your mobile. It was almost midnight. You had danced around this for minutes now; not conjuring enough bravery to call him. By now you've tried about a million times - failing.

So, once more you took a deep breath, squeezed your red and teary eyes shut and swallowed the lump in your throat. Your finger hovered above the green button beside your husband's contact.

I have to, I have to, I need to, I want to, you repeated within your head like a mantra, now or never - and finally tapped on the button.

His phone rang. One, two, three, four, a fifth time. You already were on the verge of hanging up when a sleep filled voice croaked out: "Darling?"

On every other day you'd have found Loki's sleepy voice drop-dead sexy... Not today.

"L-Loki?" You heard a bit of a rustling on the other end. "M here, my love, 'm here," he said huskily; "Wha' is it?" audibly trying to wake up. You swallowed hard. "I-I..." You had to cut off your own sentence, in order to hold back the tears - unsuccessfully. A small sob slipped past your quivering lips. Something the god on the other end picked up. It didn't slip his notice.

He immediately sat up and switched on the lamp above his bedside table; wide awake all of a sudden. "Y/N, what's wrong?"

"I... I am at t-the h-hospital."

Loki's eyes widened instantly in shock and fear; his heartbeat skyrocketing. "I beg your pardon; you are where?" You swallowed again; feeling the tears run down your cheeks. "The h-hospital."

Loki was already jumping out of bed.

"What?! Why?! By the Norns, what happened?! Are you hurt?!"

You wanted to scream.

"T-There was... was an incident at the b-bar and-" Loki was already slipping inside a white shirt; hastily buttoning it up and totally forgetting about his magical abilities at that moment. All he could think about was you... And his unborn child.

"I'm coming, love! I'm on my way, I-" "No," you interrupted your husband; causing him to stop dead in his movements - frowning.

"Stay w-with the kids, okay? You..." Fresh tears ran down your cheeks. "You can't leave them a-alone." "But..." Loki threw immediately in; blinded by his fear and worry about the woman he loved; about to just act headless. "Please, Loki, please," you pleaded. "Natasha is going t-to take me home. I-I just wanted to... To tell you."

Your words confused Loki. She can leave the hospital already? "B-But, love, what-" You couldn't take this anymore. You didn't have the strength to talk to him further - and you'd need all your remaining power to keep up the façade later in front of your best friend. "I'll tell you later, I p-promise," you managed to somehow choke out...

...and hung up.

Natasha and you had returned to the Avengers compound about an hour later. Now you were standing in front of the door to your family's apartment. You were exhausted. So utterly exhausted. All your power spent on crying and pretending everything was alright. All you wanted was to break down and cry yourself to sleep - but you had to talk to your husband first...

Unlocking the door, you stepped inside the dark apartment. Mostly dark apartment. The only light source came from the living room. He was waiting for you. Of course he was waiting for you.

You could already picture it in your head. He'd walk up and down in the room; worried and afraid - like a caged and hurt animal.

You took a deep breath; gathered all your leftover strength and made your way into the living room.

Loki was indeed walking up and down the room, but currently had his back to you and a hand in his messy curls. You swallowed.

"Loki..."

The soft, almost inaudible call of his name attracted his attention. He swiftly turned around; facing you. Worry was written all over his face. Your husband's eyes widened, "Y/N!" before he literally ran over to you. His big palms landed on the sides of your upper arms and his oceanic, tear stained blues wandered up and down your body; searching for injuries. "What happened?! What is wrong?! How are you feeling?!" The god's mind was racing - already. And you'd make it worse.

Tears pooled in your eyes again, just at the mere thought of what you were going to tell him.

"At... At the bar, there was an... an incident and-" While you spoke, his palms had wandered down your arms and to your hands. He lifted them gently and wanted to kiss your knuckles, as a frown formed on his forehead. "Y/N, what..." Loki interrupted you; thumbs brushing over the bruises on your wrists. "What is this? Tell me what happened, please. Right now."

You swallowed again, nodding. "There was a-a man. He... He had his eyes on me the whole evening. I could feel it. He was watching me. Just me. Not N-Nat or Wanda. Me." You could already see how Loki's jaw tightened. Anger was taking over his system already. "At s-some point I had to go to the ladies. He... He followed me. He said that he had cast an... an eye on me and that he would like to..." You cut off your own sentence. Not that you needed to finish it. Loki knew what you were going to say. "I refused, of course. T-Tried to stay polite and leave, but... He didn't let me. He... He trapped me inside the ladies, caged me against the wall." That's where the bruises come from, Loki thought. "I fought against it - against him. He was so strong."

Loki felt like he could burst because of the anger and fear running through his veins. "Please tell me he didn't..."

You knew what he wanted to say and quickly shook your head. "N-No, I headbutted him, t-then kicked him in the balls a-and perhaps even broke his nose." A relieved breath left your husbands lips. "That's my girl."

"He fled then, but..." Loki’s face hardened again. "But what?" Deep down the god knew there must have happened something else. Unless Natasha and Wanda wouldn't have taken you to the hospital.

"He... He had slammed my head against the wall, which resulted in a small cut and-" "There's more?!" You could already hear in his voice that he was furious once more. You knew that he'd love to find that guy right now and do terrible, awful things to him.

You nodded once more. "When he grabbed me, I... I tried to fight against him a-and escape. I almost made it, but then he..." You had to swallow down the lump in your throat and suppress the tears. "He kneed me in the s-stomach to prevent me from e-escaping."

Your husband's mind was way too clouded with anger and fear. He couldn't think clearly, and therefore was unable to connect the dots. Norse curse words spluttered from his lips and his eyes darkened. Threat his family and you'll bring out the darkest side of him - you knew that.

"I'll find him, my love." "Loki." You spoke in a weak voice, trying to get through to him. "I'll find him and then I'll kill him." "Loki." "Slowly and intimately." "Loki, please." "I'll make him pay for what he did to you and-" You couldn't take it any longer. You had to tell him.

"Loki, I lost the baby."

Your sentence cut through the air like his daggers through skin. Loki's mouth clapped shut and a very unpleasant silence spread in the living room. He needed a second to process your words. You just stared at him; silent tears running down your cheeks and dripping on your blouse, as you watched Loki fall apart in front of you.

"W-What?" He croaked out; seemingly still unable to grasp this.

"I... I lost our baby."

He started to shake his head. "No, that's... It can't be. Everything was alright!" "I know," you sobbed. "But I was at the hospital... They checked. The incident caused the m-miscarriage." You stepped closer and reached for his hands. Loki blinked; tears escaping the corner of his eyes. "I-I'm sorry. I-I'm so sorry."

You wanted to hug your husband; catch him mid-falling and preferably crash on the hard ground of reality together with him - but he took a step back. "No, no, no, no..." His hands suddenly dropped yours. Without his touch, you had never felt more cold and lonely.

"Loki, what-" "This is your fault." He suddenly exclaimed; driving an invisible dagger straight through your heart. "It's your fault, Y/N and you know it. I told you! I told you to stay and not go in the first place! I told you to take it easy this early in the pregnancy!" He ran both his hands over his face and tugged frustratingly at his raven curls, while you just stood there; frozen. You didn't know what was happening.

"We almost lost Narfi, because you explicitly wanted to accompany me to that stupid charity event and now?! Now exactly that happened, of what I've always been afraid of! Of what I've always warned you! But no... You just didn't want to listen!"

You were still staring at him, mouth agape. This wasn't real, you thought. I must be dreaming.

"M-My... My fault?" You croaked out; feeling like you were going to fall apart. "Yes!" Loki hissed. "You heard what I said, did you not?!" Sure, you understood that this was equally as hard and sad as it was for you. You understood the cocktail of emotions which must be brewing inside of him, but that... That was unacceptable. You hoped he'd catch you, be there for you, grieve together with you... But certainly not that he'd blame you.

"How can you blame me for this? I didn't kick myself in the gut, did I? Besides, you could've just accompanied me! Perhaps all of this would've never happened, but no, Mr. Laufeyson didn't want to!" You felt how anger rose within you as well. It was just too much.

"Me?!" Loki hissed; pressing his pointer finger in the muscle on his chest. "Oh, I'm the one to blame now?! Sure... It's easy to blame me - for everyone! Just blame the former war criminal. Just blame the untrustworthy god. Just blame the monster from another realm - and all your problems are solved!" He laughed bitterly; shaking his head.

"That's... That's not what I meant - and you know it!" Your husband cocked his head. "Oh no? It's not? Enlighten me then, Y/N!"

You sighed. "Look... I understand your worries. I really do, but I can't just sit on the sofa 24/7 and not move a muscle, just because I'm pregnant! That's not how it works!"

Loki snorted. "Well, it should! As you can see, everything else is apparently not working!" You shook your head; stepped closer to Loki. "We... We just lost our baby... Shouldn't we... Shouldn't we grieve toge-" The god interrupted you, tears streaming down his face. "Yes, and I'm not the one to blame." With those words he brushed past you, "I will be sleeping on the sofa tonight." and left you behind; feeling more cold and lonely than you ever did in your whole life before...

The loss of the new life growing within you and the fight you and Loki had that night caused a wide rift to appear between the two of you. It split your relationship apart. Everything else would be a lie.

You felt how he grew cold and distant. Just like you did. The once perfectly harmonic, loving and desiring bond cracked.

Sure, there had always been fights, misunderstandings and disagreements - totally normal things. But this... This was different.

...and you just didn't know how to stop your marriage from falling apart...

Whenever you tried to speak with him about the topic, he'd immediately steered the conversation into a different direction. Hence, he talked less to you in general. No deep conversations anymore, no love declarations - nothing.

The communication lacked, just like the physical touch. You'd get a kiss from time to time, yes, but nothing more. Barely cuddles, no long, intimate kisses and certainly no sex.

It hurt you. To the core - but the sad thing about it all was, that you actually hadn't a single reason to complain, because you weren't better. You gave him just as little as he gave you. It was a mutual thing - and at some point didn't go unnoticed anymore...

"Y/N."

"Y/N, hey."

Natasha's voice urged to your ears, but didn’t reach your brain. All you did was staring ahead; totally lost in thoughts. Only when you felt her touch on your shoulder was your best friend able to get through to you.

"Babes, your glass in flowing over." You snapped your head down at her words; eyes widening. "Shit, shit, shit." You hastily turned off the tap, while Nat helped you to dry the outside of the glass, so you could wipe your hands on a kitchen towel.

"Thanks, Nat." You took the glass, "I-I've been a bit lost in thoughts." and gave her a small smile. "Yeah, I saw that," the Widow pointed out and crossed her arms over her chest, before she leaned against the bar counter across from you.

"Okay, babes... We definitely need to talk." You swallowed; frowning. "Talk? W-Why?"

Nat scoffed. "Oh, please stop that, Y/N... You can't fool me. Perhaps the others around us, but not me. Something's off. I can tell. You've been so absent-minded lately. Always in thoughts and very quiet. Your smile doesn't reach your eyes either - and..." She gave you an intense look. "... the most worrying thing... You behave differently around Loki. More distant. Colder. Less touchy." Her eyebrows furrowed. "What's wrong between you two? And no, don't tell me it has just been a small fight, because this goes already on for at least two weeks. I saw it. So, don't even try to shit me, girl."

You swallowed again. That was clearly an order. You already knew that you weren’t going to lie yourself out of this situation, but... Did you even want that? Perhaps it was good to finally get this off your chest...

So, you nodded; nervously fumbling with your hands. "You... You are right. But, please can we talk about this in private?" Her eyes widened. "It is that bad?" You took a deep breath; nodding again."I'm afraid, yes."

Natasha nodded; rubbing your upper arm in a reassuring manner. "Let's head over to mine. Bruce is in the lab."

You followed your best friend to her apartment and only five minutes later sat down on her sofa; Nat following. "He didn't cheat on you, did he? Because if this fucker did, I'm going to cut off his ba-" "He didn't," you immediately interrupted her. "Loki never would. I know that. You know that." The red-haired beauty looked you straight in the eyes. "What did he do then?"

You swallowed. Memories of that night four weeks back started to flood your brain and causing you to hold back the tears.

"Remember that night where... Where we were at that bar? You, Wanda and I? And that incident with that strange man? You, taking me to the hospital afterwards?" The spy nodded; "Of course, yes." listening to you patiently. "I told you it was about the cut on the back of my head - and that was the truth, but... There was also something else..." You had to take a deep breath.

No one besides Loki had known about the pregnancy... Until now.

"He kneed me in the stomach - which wouldn't have been that much of a problem, but in my case it was, because I..." Your best friend's eyes widened. She was smart and therefore seemingly already had connected the dots. "Are you saying what I think you're saying?" Nat's eyes dropped to your stomach, before they lifted to face you again. "Are you...? Again?"

You nodded. "Pregnant, yes. I-I was pregnant again." Those words still hurt you more than you thought. You lowered your head; feeling a few silent tears running down your cheek.

"No... You... Oh my gosh..." Natasha gasped; immediately reached for your hand. "You're telling me that this wanker caused you to have a... miscarriage?" "Yes."

"Shit, I'm so sorry, babes. Gods, that's horrible. Come here." Your best friend hugged you tightly against her chest; just letting you cry for a while.

"And... Loki?" You snivelled. "Well, that's the point... I told him afterwards. We kinda had a fight and... He blamed me, I blamed him and ever since we didn't properly talk. We are drifting more and more apart. What had happened, split our relationship. We are losing each other - and it kills me." "Why didn't you talk with him then?" You swallowed; shaking your head.

"Because I feel like the rift between us is already too big. I won't make the jump." Nat squeezed your hand. "But you gotta try, babes. You love that man, right? He's your soulmate. The love of your life. Your baby daddy." You nodded. "Yes, I... I do. With all my heart." "See? You gotta try. But remember... It takes two to tango."

Her last words roamed through your head even several hours after the conversation. Perhaps it was really both your faults... You took a deep breath. You and Loki had to save this ship from sinking - at all costs. You didn't want to lose him. Never.

"Daddy?" Loki looked up at Ella. She was seated on the sofa backrest above him; legs dangling over his shoulders, as she was braiding several plaits into his long raven locks.

"Yes, princess?"

"You love mommy, right?"

The god's eyebrows slanted. "Of course, princess. Why are you asking?" The little girl shrugged her shoulders. "Because you and mommy don't have private time anymore."

Loki swallowed; realisation hitting him like a truck – completely out of the blue. "Well..." He cleared his throat. "Sometimes, we have little time for this, you know?" "Oh... Okay." Ella paused and Loki hoped that she'd just drop that topic know.

She did. Almost.

"Is mommy happy?" Ella dropped the next question, while small hands worked through another strand of her father's hair.

Again, Loki had to swallow - hard. "Y-Yes, I think so, why?" Yes, it was a lie. But he couldn't tell his eight-year-old daughter that you just lost her baby sibling, could he?

"But why is mommy crying so often then?"

Ella's next words hit Loki even harder. It felt like his heart was jumping over the edge of a cliff; free falling and shattering into a million pieces.

"W-What?" He croaked out; mouth falling agape.

"I see and hear mommy cry a lot."

Loki wanted to scream from the top of his lungs. You had shut him out - of course you did. After all he said why wouldn't you? You had every reason to banish him.

He blamed you; acted headless and stupid. He pushed you away when you needed him most. He fucked it up - real bad this time.

"I'm a fool..." Loki mumbled underneath his breath to himself. "I'm such a fool..."

"What did you say, daddy?" His daughter's innocent voice cut through the air once again. "Nothing, princess..." Loki answered; shaking his head. "I'm going to talk to mommy, okay?" Blue eyes looked up to meet his identical ones. "Will you make her feel better?" A breathless laugh escaped the gods lips; tears dripping down his chin. "Yes, princess... By the Norns, yes."

Loki watched you move through the kitchen from the hallway. He had just tucked the kids in and was finally able to talk with you. The conversation was long due.

Taking a deep breath, he stepped closer; feeling his heart hammering against his chest. He was so nervous. So afraid. What if you couldn't forgive him? What if he was going to lose you?

"Y/N?" The god called out your name softly. "Yes?" Your voice was cold. Distant.

A shiver ran down his spine.

"Darling, we... We need to talk... Please."

You froze in your movement; back towards your husband.

"Why? When I tried to talk to you a few weeks ago, you blocked me." Loki swallowed hard; Adam's apple bobbing within his throat. "I-I know, but... I see clearly now." He cautiously approached you. "I am so sorry, my love. I know now that I really fucked it up. I was- am such a fool. Norns, I don't know what has gotten into me. I... I just... saw red. Blaming you for the loss of our baby is the worst thing I ever did in my whole life." Tears pooled in his eyes, as you turned to face him.

"I pushed you away when you needed me the most. I should've been there for you. I should've supported you and help you through this, but no... I did the exact opposite." Loki paused for a moment; trying desperately to control his tears.

"I know what I did is unacceptable and I can't expect you to forgive me, but..." The god felt how his knees started to buckle. The weight of the possibility that you weren’t going to forgive him or even worse... Leave him, was hitting him full force. All his strength left his body and he fell down on his knees in front of you. "I-I'm begging you for forgiveness. Please, my love, please... I beg of you. Please don't leave me. I couldn't take it, I-" The lump in his throat cut off his sentence. All he could do was cry.

You witnessed the scenes in front of you; heart shattering.

"Loki..." Your soft, almost angelic voice urged to his ears. "Loki, I... I would never, ever - not in my wildest dreams leave you. You're the best thing that ever happened to me. I never could, I... I love you."

Blue eyes looked up at you in disbelief. "W-What? You... You forgive m-me?" You nodded; feeling tears build up in your eyes as well. You couldn't help but lower your hands and cup your husband's tear stained cheeks; feeling his soft skin underneath your palm. "Of course, my love."

Loki blinked. "Why? I treated you so bad. Something I swore I'd never do and yet I did... I blamed you for... For something which was entirely my fault."

You frowned. "Your fault? Why would this be your fault?" You wiped away another tear with your thumb. "It isn't, Loki. When it's somebody's fault, it's mine. You were right. It is my fault. I should've been more careful." "No..." Loki shook his head quickly. "No, Y/N, stop that right now, please... Don't blame yourself. I should've protected you better... And the baby, I... I failed."

You feared that your heart was going to stop beating right then and there. It hurt. Seeing Loki like that destroyed you. "No, Loki..." You sobbed and sunk to the floor as well; immediately embracing him. "We both failed, but... It happened. We can't change the past. We have to live with it." You felt Loki nod against your shoulder. "I-I know."

You squeezed him tightly against your body, just like Loki frantically tried to hold on to you. Finally, you felt better again. Since weeks. You had missed the comforting touch of your husband. It was all you ever wanted and needed. Just like he did.

You almost physically felt how the rift between you got smaller and smaller with each passing minute.

You had found each other again.

Neither of you knew how much time had passed. An hour? Two? More? But it also didn't matter. Not right now, not here. You were still embracing each other; your hand gently running through his long curls. "We're going to make this, okay? Together. Like everything before." Another nod from Loki. He was overwhelmed by all the emotions running through his veins. "Yes."

And you did.

Sure, what had happened didn't fail to leave marks on both you and Loki; a deep scar carved into your heart and soul - but it also didn't fail to make your bond stronger. Even if it did not seem like it at first.

Baby Fever Crew: @muddyorbsblr @mochie85 @asgards-princess-of-mischief @jaidenhawke @multifandom-worlds @jennyggggrrr @mishkatelwarriorgoddess @fictive-sl0th @herdetectivetheorist @hisredheadedgoddess28 @chennqingg @princess-ofthe-pages @km-ffluv @simping-for-marvel @huntedmusicgardenn @lokiforever @stupidthoughtsinwriting @loz-3 @jaguarthecat @icytrickster17 @eleniblue @yourfriendlyslytherinhc @kimanne723 @lou12346789 @mypainischronicbutmyassisiconic @smolvenger @lokisrealpurpous @isaidoop @lokisgoodgirl @aagn360 @cakesandtom @alexakeyloveloki @glitchquake @anukulee @lady-rose-moon @ainsley30 @lovingchoices14 @lokischambermaid @irishhappiness @mandywholock1980 @totsnotlynn

[neopuppy]

Arcade (M)

pairing. Jeno x female reader

genre. hmm what’s all this then? anyway…… smut, M/F, pwp

warnings. vaginal/backdoor unprotected rough sex, rimming, non-consented camera use, you don’t have to read Switch+Chain to understand but it might help. minors DNI.

wc. 6k+

now playing. Arcade//NCT Dream

It’s hard.

It’s been hard actually, attempting to commit to some type of relationship while living in the same household as your.. whatever he was.

First love, the man who took your virginity, your boyfriend's father.

It doesn’t help that things have been really tense between you and Jeno ever since your mom refused to move out, claiming Johnny needs to compensate her for uprooting her life with false hope of a future together.

He acquires the guest room most nights, or…doesn’t come home, and you notice— you notice it every time. When he shows up the next day, neck garnished with bitten bruises poorly hidden under his collar, lips swollen red from whatever he got up to. The avoidance he graces you with— never once meeting your gaze as he passes by on the way to his office. It’s been about a month of this; and on top of it all your mother refuses to let you enjoy any alone time with Jeno.

‘I don’t approve of this.’ She repeats daily, shoving between the two of you sitting together in the living room. ‘You are not allowed to date this horrid insolent boy.’

Jeno can’t stand it either, not helping his case with his rude and disrespectful responses, arguing back and forth with her about how this is technically his house and she can leave.

“I can’t deal with your mom anymore.” He whispers. It’s 1am, also the time your mother typically passes out after raiding Johnny’s wine cabinet. Keeping you up later every night as you have to wait to sneak to each other’s bedrooms. “It’s been two weeks.”

Two weeks since you fucked.. in the upstairs bathroom at Mark’s house, some Saturday night kick back. Even then the two of you hadn’t mentioned your.. situationship to anyone. Jeno’s friends finding it peculiar how often he’s canceled on them to hang out with his… whatever you are.

“We can try a quiet activity..” you tease, tickling under his shirt.

“I can’t even fuck you in my room anymore without her breathing down my neck.” Jeno scowls, pushing his nose against your forehead. “Besides, we both know how loud you get, baby.”

“I’ll keep my mouth shut.”

“I have an idea,” Jeno had already brought up getting a hotel before, foregoing the thought as his bank account stared back at him looking bleak; failing to mention that his father had cut off the weekly allowance he’d become accustomed to after their blow up(you know, the one about you). “Haechan just became a keyholder at that arcade place he works at.”

“You want to play video games, right now?”

“No no, I’m gonna ask him for a favor.” Jeno smiles, pulling you close to his chest. “For us.”

“Where are you going?”

Your foot tracks come to a halt just as you reach the front door, more dressed up than usual. Nothing much, a short velvet dress with lace trimming, something Jeno picked out from your closet without knowing who gifted it to you in the first place.

Placing your hand on your chest in mock-shock, you gasp turning to face Johnny. “Oh my God, I haven’t heard your voice in so long— I’d forgotten you even live here.”

“I remember this dress.” Johnny’s gaze traces down, stopping at your chest for a second too long as his mouth tweaks to one side. “You were supposed to wear it—“

“Yeah.” You interrupt, reaching for the hem floating just under the jut of your buttcheek to play with. “For our next weekend together, you said I looked pretty when I tried it on.”

“You do,” Johnny’s eyebrows come together, trailing down lower to your strappy heels and manicured toes. “You look beautiful, sexy. Gorgeous as always.”

“..do you miss me?” The question comes out unexpectedly, biting down on the sides of your tongue after asking, nervously pinching your thighs together as he nods; hand running through his loose hair and tugging at the ends.

“Of course I do.” Johnny nearly smiles, the corners of his lips pointing up, none of it reaching his dark eyes continuing to stay low and avoid your face. “But you’re going to meet my son right now, aren’t you?”

“No!” You snap to answer too fast, clearing your throat and swiping your hair back. “I’m meeting my friends.”

“You don’t have friends.” Johnny scoffs a laugh jokingly, shrugging half-apologetically. “Your mom asked me to make sure you stay away from Jeno, you know.”

“He’s my boy—friend..” you say hesitantly. “I think..”

“Yes, you do seem to be a pair.” Johnny hums, leaning against the hallway wall. “It’s almost as if your mother won’t leave my son's side and Jeno won’t leave yours. I don’t believe I’ve seen you once without him around ever since..”

“Ever since we broke up?”

“We didn’t break up.” Johnny’s fast to correct. “We were never together, not you and I anyway.” He waves off, more sluggish in appearance now as you step closer and take in his tired expression. “I should have left you alone.”

“What do you me—“

“You should get going, Jeno’s been waiting outside for a while now.” Johnny cuts you off, motioning to the front door. “Probably getting annoyed knowing him.”

“Did you ever love me?” You know you shouldn’t, but Johnny’s right; if Jeno’s not plastered to your back then your mom’s hovering around with her nose deep in your business. Over the last few weeks cuddled up next to Jeno wide awake as he softly snores you can’t stop your mind from spinning, asking questions you never received answers to.

“You still have to ask?” His shoulders fall, slumping further against the wall, hooded eyes falling to his feet. “Of course I did.. I still do. I always will.”

“Then why did yo—“

“What’s taking so long!” Jeno busts through the front door, pausing with his knuckles turning white where he grips the handle hard enough to break off. “What the fuck is going on here?”

“Nothing.” Johnny says casually, shoving off the wall to stand up straight. “As we agreed to, nothing at all.” He nods in Jeno’s direction, returning to his usual stature of living without acknowledging your existence, not even a ‘goodbye’ wave before exiting the room.

Jeno grabs the crook of your elbow tugging you back into his chest hard enough to have you stumbling, gasping out of shock. “Was he talking to you?!”

“Huh? Ow! You’re hurting me!” Tugging your arm away at the same time Jeno releases as if you’ve burned off the skin off his palm sends you tumbling forward, saved by his arm swiftly coming to wrap around your waist; eyes bouncing around full of concern and confusion.

“Sorry! I mean..” Jeno’s teeth grind together, softly squeezing you in his hold. “I’m sorry, didn’t mean to..”

“Okay.. is everything alright?”

He frowns, ducking in to press his chin against your shoulder, eyelashes dragging down to the side as his eyes fall and lose their usual sparkle. “Yeah, I’m sorry…”

“It’s okay Jeno.. let’s get going, yeah?”

“Yeah yeah.” He nods, pecking your skin before moving back to get the door for you. “I didn’t think he was home, swore I heard him leave earlier. Thought he’d be gone for the night fucking some whore.”

Jeno leads you to his car, missing the way you flinch at the mention of Johnny’s reoccurring activities, still sensitive as you try to process the answer you’ve been looking for.

I always will. That’s what Johnny said.. but there was something else.

Jeno’s driving, drumming on the steering wheel to calm his anxiety, the image of your back facing him with his fathers lazy eyes on you as you stood much too close together won’t leave his mind. He’s sick of it really, fighting his own father for the same girl; brainstorming new ways to threaten him. Even breaking into the old man’s home office to look through his patients files for some dirt, completely illegal but what about this predicament isn’t at this point.

“Back there..” you break his thoughts, clearing your throat.

“Huh?” Jeno glances, shifting his tense shoulders to relax and lean back in his seat. “Back there?”

“Your dad.. he said something, about ‘as we agreed to’ I think..” you say cautiously, picking at your cuticle. “Did you guys ever talk? About.. us?”

Jeno steps down on the brake abruptly, hurling your chest forward restrained by the seat belt that tightens up around you. “What?”

At least the lights red, you think, rubbing at your sore chest. “...Ow..”

Jeno sighs, more annoyed now, tapping the steering wheel with more aggression. “What the hell are you talking about?”

“Things have been weird, awkward I guess.. ever since..”

“Since he dumped you?” He sneers, pushing down on the gas pedal too hard and revving off down the street, luckily empty at this late hour.

“We weren’t together, not like.. not like how you and I are. I mean—“

“He took advantage of you..” Jeno shakes his head, zipping through intersections without bothering to slow down or stop. “He took advantage of you, and you let him.”

“That’s not—“

“It’s okay.” Hitting the brakes he stops, pulling into a parking spot with ease, using one hand to steer the wheel into place. “It’s okay.” Jeno repeats again, as if to reassure himself more than anything. “My dad, that fucking asshole..”

Pulling the shift into park, he leans back again, the back of his head slamming against the seat frustrated. “It’s not your fault. When I was a kid he used to psychoanalyze me too, used that shit to manipulate me.”

Johnny didn’t manipulate me, your lip twitches to say, folding your hands together as you purse your lips tight.

“He blamed me, you know— for my mom leaving..” Jeno’s tongue drags inside of his cheek, wandering eyes gleaming more beneath the night sky breaking through the windshield. “I never stood a chance against him honestly, even now I can’t trust he’ll leave you alone.”

“He does leave me alone, Jeno.”

“Yeah.” He pauses, turning halfway in his seat to face you, head tilted as he takes in your confusion. “I told him to leave you alone, is that a problem?”

“..and he agreed? Is that what he meant?” You ask wearily, picking up over time that Jeno can’t keep eye contact when he lies, becoming shifty and distracted as he mumbles.

He blinks slowly, tongue poking between his lips in thought without tearing away from your gaze. “I told him that I really like you, and for once in my life I want to have a chance at something genuine.”

Jeno’s playful demeanor you’ve become acquainted with(although still perplexing at times) seems to disappear the more he speaks, concerning you enough to take a hold of his hand. “Hey..”

He mumbles something hard to make out, sinking against his seat. “I hate seeing him around you, I know you don’t see it the way I do but.. he used you.”

Ouch.

How could Jeno so easily ruin your delusional high of believing his father had actual feelings for you with just a few words. It’s not worth discussing, not with him, he’d never see it the way you do.

Understandably so, to him Johnny may as well be the scum of the earth while he consumed your entire world, day to night; continuing to daydream of the future you could have with your boyfriend's dad. The idea alone fucked up enough to make you nauseous now, having to swallow the bitter taste of bile down. As sick as it is, Johnny had made a home for himself in your heart.. at least the parts Jeno hadn’t managed to infiltrate.

Half of you really contemplated choosing stupidity, ruin your chances of getting dicked down tonight. Perhaps spice it up, Jeno had become.. soft as of late, but the distress across his pretty face quelled your hunger for drama, for now.

“So, what you’re saying is..” you bend in closer, jerking his chin up to look at you, hand squeezing around his. “You really like me?”

Jeno’s smile returns, huffing out a laugh, hiding half of his face in the seat. “Fighting my dad for you wasn’t enough? I have to say it too?”

Shrugging, you lean in closer, biting at his earlobe. “Wouldn’t hurt to hear once in a while after years of thinking you hated me.”

“Well..” the sound of keys jingling turns your attention to Jeno’s hand coming up between you, eyebrow lifted suggestively. “I think you like it, actually— I know you love it when I fuck you like I hate you.”

“You’re gonna fuck me in the arcade?” You glance outside, ‘High Scores’ lights up the hood of his car, the rest of the street dim and empty compared to the bright neon light flickering above you. “Does Haechan know you’re risking his job to have sex uninterrupted?”

Jeno laughs, opening his door to get out and grab yours, the nice gestures still taking awhile to get used to.(This is the same guy that made you get out of his car and walk to school just to not be seen with you afterall.)

“Most he said is to not leave a mess behind and make sure I lock up when we’re done here.” Helping you out he pushes your back to the passenger door, gaze back to the excited playful one you prefer. “I can always fuck you here instead.”

Even now the thrill of secrecy reminds you of him... the times he’d pull you into the backseat of his SUV to steal a kiss; softly pecking your lips while mumbling that he needed a little taste of you everyday, thumbing at his bottom lip while he sat across from you during dinner and stole glances at you. The craving for more always lingering.

“Right here? Where anyone can see?” You ask, pretending to be shocked with wide eyes and clutching your chest. “You think I’m some whore you can just fuck on the street?”

Jeno bites down on his tongue, smirking and grabbing your hips. “I knew this dress would look good on you.” He hikes up the sides around your hips, lifting you up onto the hood to sit and make space between your thighs. “I like it when you listen to me.”

It’s little things like this that heat up your chest, stinging from within between guilt and a yearning need. The twisted part of your mind consumed by the thought that Jeno’s so similar to his dad, just younger, a little naive, but he’s definitely not as dumb as you had assumed.

“Do you think I look pretty?” You ask coyly, pulling his hips in closer with a tight squeeze of your thighs. Jeno wraps around your waist, face only an inch away from yours now, his tone lowering to a deep rasp.

“You’re always pretty. You know when I brought you around my friends I had to stop myself from putting Jaemin in a headlock with the shit he was saying.” His hands roam lower as he goes on, smoothing up the sides of your thighs to play with the straps of your underwear. “Had to remind myself that they don’t know about us.. yet.”

“Yet?”

Jeno hums, gathering your underwear to one side to swipe his thumb between your folds; his cheeks rising upon making contact with your wet entrance. “Once your mom gets off my ass it’ll be easier for us. I guess I’m still worried.”

He mumbles with lowered eyelids, grabbing onto your inner thigh to spread you open further. Not quite lying, not quite telling you the truth. “You still don’t trust me, right?

The skin between his eyebrows wrinkles slightly, long eyelashes fanning across the tops of his cheeks. “Seeing you with him today, I feel..”

“You can be honest with me baby.”

Jeno nods, the wrinkles on his forehead deepening, smearing two fingers over the outside of your entrance haphazardly. “I’m annoyed, I’m mad. I hate that he still gets to see you— to see you look pretty for me.”

“We didn’t talk.” You lie, cupping his face to smooth away the stress tightening his jaw. “He was just passing by.”

“You’re not lying, are you?” Jeno asks slowly, also familiar with the way you bite your lip when you lie. Even the smallest movement of biting one corner is enough to give you away.

“I’m not lying.” You say, tugging your lip in under your teeth with a smile, quickly moving to kiss his nose before he can continue interrogating you. Jeno’s eyes drop shut swallowing back his disappointed sigh, hand sliding away to grip your thighs and pull your core closer to his crotch.

“I know we don’t talk about this,” his face dips into the crook of your neck to hide, breath fanning down your throat mixing in with the chilled night air. “..and I know I can’t ask you to ignore him, we all live together..”

“Jeno” you say, pulling back to grab a hold of his face again. “We live together, you realize that? It’s always you, me.. and my mom unfortunately.”

He smiles at that, playfully biting at your thumb poking against the corner of his mouth. “I’m not used to my dad actually doing something nice for me.” Other than funding him with money, which hasn’t been the case as of late. Jeno considers that maybe you were the exchange, no more allowance but hey- I’ll let you have the girl.

Fixing his wind swept bangs to uncover his forehead, you wonder what exactly was said in this agreement; had Johnny really given up on you so easily? How could he say he still loves you and watch another man, let alone his own son, prance around in his face holding and kissing you? It didn’t make any sense..

Jeno shivers, smoothing your dress back down and nodding toward the Arcade. “It’s getting cold, wanna head inside and play?”

He helps you off the hood, taking a hold of your hand and using his other to unlock the front door. “Oh? You know, I can kick your ass at Pac-man.”

Jeno pulls you in, locking the door back up, the inside mostly dark aside from a few strips of neon lights bordering the ceiling. “Is that all you know how to play?” He laughs, drawing you further in with both hands taking a hold of yours. “We both know I can eat you up easily.”

Coming to a stop he flicks on a switch, the room coming to life with lights and mixtures of video game music from different machines. Most of them classic vintage games, a few pinball machines and air hockey table. Nothing much, but a gamers safe haven nonetheless.

“There’s Street Fighter, Ninja Turtles, Super Mario Brothers, Frogger..” Jeno walks around keeping you by his side, chuckling at your lost expression as you look at him like he’s speaking a foreign language. “Pac-man it is, winner takes it all yeah?”

“What are we playing for?” You grumble, feigning annoyance because this is not what you had in mind when Jeno texted you about sneaking out together.

“If I win, I get to do whatever I want with you.” He beams, eyebrows raising up and down before inserting coins into the game.

“What if I win?”

“If you win..” pouting his lips, Jeno sways in thought, snapping his fingers. “I get to do whatever I want with you.” He says proudly, displaying all of his pearly white perfect teeth.

“Don’t you already?” You say in an annoyed tone, nudging against his side and grabbing onto a joystick.

“There is one thing, actually.” Jeno lowers his gaze scanning down your figure, eyes ending on your backside. “I believe you know what I want.”

“Right now?” You have to splutter a bit, nervously squeezing your thighs together. “Won’t it hurt though?”

He laughs, barely, more of an act to stop himself from replying with ‘That’s the point.’

“No baby, it’ll feel good.” Jeno sticks out his pinky, jutting his pink bottom lip out covered with a sheen of spit. “I prom.”

“Prom?” You question, distracted by how enticing his mouth looks pouting at you paired with a wide glossy gaze.

“Half a promise,” he winks, locking your pinkies together. “It might hurt actually.”

“Jeno!”

“Winner takes it all!” He laughs, returning to focus on starting your game of Pac-man.

“Jeno, what the fuck! This isn’t fair!” You panic, immediately falling behind as his hand seems to blur and you crash into another ghost.

“What can I say? I’m a pro.” He says nonchalantly, the smirk painting his lips growing. “You know what else I’m a pro at eating?”

“Jeno!” You splutter, distracted by the wink he shoots at you as another sound of disappointment blasts from the game's speakers, on your last leg of life attempting to catch up to your opponent nearing the end.

“Winners win.” Jeno’s arms lift up proudly, boasting his victory with flexed biceps. “Losers lose.”

He keeps cheering, arms pumping and pretending to wave at a crowd as the game congratulates his victory. “You didn’t tell me you were good at this game!”

“Well, you said you could kick my ass.” He shrugs, grabbing your wrists and dragging you toward him. “It seems I will be the one beating your ass up instead.”

Jeno taps the pout that’s formed on your lips, disguising how irritated he feels in actuality. Tapping your bottom lip, he hums and leans back against a wall. “You wouldn’t lie to me, right?”

“Why do you keep asking?” You lilt, tilting your head suspiciously as you reach for his neck. Jeno snaps away too fast, quickly averting his gaze aside before you can catch his disappointment; his palms finding purchase around your waist and manhandling you against the wall.

“No reason,” he whispers, trapping your earlobe between his teeth and knocking his hips along your backside. “Don’t forget who won.”

The sound of his belt unlatching scratches at the back of your skull drowning out the arcade noises around you; with a bicep locking your arms together he wraps it around your elbows. The restraint tightens immediately, locking your arms in place behind your back. “Does it hurt, baby?”

‘Does it hurt badly?’

Pressing your cheek to the wall you shake, quietly muttering ‘no’, the churn in your stomach confusing you with arousal and guilt.

“That’s too bad..” pulling up your dress to bunch at your waist, Jeno slaps your ass softly, stroking his fingers over the roundness of your hips, dipping beneath the juncture between meaty flesh meeting thigh. “I know how much you love when it hurts.”

“Je—“

“Shhh.” Biting down on your earlobe, he tugs until you squeal, knees knocking together from the pain shooting through your ear. “See how you’re so fucking loud?”

Jeno sinks down into a squat gripping the sides of your ass and squeezing. His palms feel hot, heavy, digging his thin hard fingers into your cheeks. He pulls you open watching the thin string of your underwear fail to cover your holes completely, breath suctioning loudly between spit when he hisses and presses forward digging his nose against your barely concealed hole.

“Fuck!” You bite down, struggling to stay still on your toes digging deeper into the sole of your heels, his nose dragging up and down between releasing groans and deep breaths. The moans vibrating between the back of your thighs playing as a soundtrack for his disgusting euphoric high, leaving his mouth popped open, teeth catching onto bits of flesh hidden inside of you.

“So good.” Jeno laps at your rim, soaking up the thin piece of underwear there, teeth biting down and pulling away enough to watch your hole flutter. Slapping at your ass with a firmer hand he tugs the string off to one side, leaning forward to press his pouty lips against your hole. Mouth hot and breathy as he stays there tracing his words against your opening. “Want me to fill your little tight virgin asshole up so fucking bad, just look at the way you’re opening up for me already.”

As if on command slick drips down your inner thigh, rim convulsing around nothing. He snickers, tapping the tip of his finger against it. “So nasty, who taught you to be this fucking nasty huh?”

Oh.

Your eyes wrinkle together, hips jumping back in search of something wet, something to quell your need.

A succession of hard slaps stills your movement, ass stinging under his palm smoothing down, jiggling your cheek against his face. “Can’t even stop yourself, can you?”

“Please…do something.. please.”

Begging, you’re always such a beggar. Jeno can’t stand it, how your writhe and whimper, so desperate to get fucked. Can’t stand how pretty you sound when you beg, when you shout his name with your eyes facing the back of your skull. He can’t stand the way his cock jumps in his pants, twitching against his phone like a reminder.

“Ask for it.” His face rubs side to side, engulfed in your aroma, nose burying in and out of your hole teasingly. “Be a good girl, ask.”

“Jeno.. please,” sniffling, you have to shut your eyes to keep your mind blank. The similarities between two different men sit on your chest, sinking into the hollow, breaking down the bones and muscle protecting your heart. “Please baby.”

“Please what?” Pulling out his phone, Jeno double checks the silent button, hitting record and focusing on your ass sticking out; lower back making the shot from the way you dip in and arch out.

“Please, please fuck me…”

“Where?” He questions, tone falling deep, raspy, scratching up his vocal chords. “Tell me where.”

“My..” breath gets caught in your throat, hole clenching up as embarrassment flows down your face. Breaking out into a whimper at the first sign of moisture reaching the rims of your eyes. “My ass.. please fuck my ass.”

“That’s right,” Jeno groans, smoothing the pad of his finger around your wrinkled hole. “No one will ever fuck you the way I fuck you.”

Spit lands on your rim, the last shot he captures before sending the video off to a text message with ‘Asshole’.

‘Only for me.’

Pocketing his phone again, he focuses on collecting your wetness, swirling it together with his spit. The sounds of your needy whines only egg him on to work fast, lapping at the skin around his fingers until your knees bend and you shove back against his face.

Jeno contemplates for a second, mindlessly prodding the tips of two fingers in and out of your pulsating rim, your wanton cries driving him mad the longer he teases.

It shouldn’t hurt, but you deserve for it to hurt, because you’re a fucking liar, because you’d rather lie to him and allow his mind to wander.

Before he can shake away the worry, his phone buzzes, distracting him for a moment before pressing into your hole to keep you occupied.

‘Ask your little girlfriend about our conversation you rudely interrupted. I wouldn’t be so sure if I was you.’

Jeno can’t believe how fast this fucking asshole replies, nearly crushing his phone and jabbing his fingers into you roughly at the same time.

“Ahh!”

“Shut up.” He growls, shoving his phone away, proceeding to jackhammer two fingers inside your ass. A wad of spit lands around them adding a small amount of lubricant, his roughness forcing your ass to shake around the pressure.

“Baby please, ah!” Struggling to stay still, your toes pinch together, pushing your forehead against the wall with another cry. Tears stain down your cheeks the more he ignores you, muscles rippling up his forearm beneath pulsing large veins. “Please, slow..slow down!”

Another growl is all you hear in response, dipping in to lavv at the tough skin constricting around his fingers, his free hand reaching between your thighs to pinch at your clit and distract your mind from the pain.

Jeno’s ears fill up from the heat surrounding him, forcing another digit inside your hole and groaning at the visual of how obscenely stretched you are around him. Still managing to push in past your resistance, his stare burns, stuck on the little flex and pinch your ass gives with each push inside.

“Fuck, you feel so good.”

A startled broken moan slips out of you, caught off guard by how deep, near demonic his vibrato’s fallen to. The surprise has your hips canting back full of fear, excitement, Jeno’s fingers digging deep into your ass pushing against your walls.

“Relax, you’ll make this hurt more than it has to.”

The glide of his nose pressing to your neglected hole has you jolting up, legs pin straight the second his tongue flicks at your clit. His hand reaches around grasping your thigh, strong hold pushing you to sit down on his face. He tongues at your bundle of nerves viciously, nose suffocated by the ridiculous amount of slick pouring out of you, the majority of it dripping down past the consistent small dip in and out of you, trickling a pathway down his thick neck, bobbing and struggling to breathe with his airway full of arousal.

“Ah fuck! I’m close!” Full of urgency you scream, hands twitching like crazy to grab onto something, anything to help you stay attached to reality. He only speeds up, the fat of his tongue dragging along your swollen clit roughly, powerfully working you into a faster frenzy until your thighs quake.

Jeno’s relentless, tongue blurring against your clit with speed, nose stuffed as deep as possible, the three digits curling up and pulling. Pain and pleasure hit a new high, bending your neck back into a deep arch as your climax hits and erupts hard enough to choke him between the wet squirt and weight of your lower half coming down.

Slapping down on your upper thigh, Jeno gags, coughing from the fluid filling his nostrils, fingers crooking up before sliding out and smearing the mess of spit down your leg.

“Come here.” He drags your lifeless body down to his lap, switching to hold his weight against the wall, lips landing against yours in a mess of heat. The drool pouring from your mouth blends with his spit coated lips vocalizing the hunger of your mouths fighting for dominance. “Wanna..”

Jeno pants, licking at every crevice of skin and tongue like a thirsty puppy, eyes glazed over as he gazes at your already wrecked face. “..see you, wanna see you.”

“Uh huh,” nodding you wrap around his neck, forehead landing against his cheek lazily as he positions you over his length. The whole act feels dirty, a memory you’ll recall someday; how silly it is to be a teenager having to sneak around just to get laid(all because you fucked your boyfriend’s dad). “See you.” You repeat breathless, cock dragging between your folds drenched by wet arousal that won’t stop leaking.

“Pussy dripping wet for me, know why?” Jeno’s arm squeezes around your middle, hot mouth dragging up your jaw to whisper in your ear. “Cause you’re a fucking slut, and all sluts know how to do is take cock.”

The cry you let out shaking your head with denial gets lost, Jeno capturing your bottom lip in a rough kiss and thrusting up to fill you halfway. He grunts, pushing your body lower to bury the rest of his length inside and swallow down your cries. “Slutty fuck hole.”

Eyelashes flutter along your cheek, hot tightness wrapped around his size drawing deep guttural moans out. Hips jerk upward, lodging the entirety of his length inside of you. He’s overbearing, sucking the moans out of your mouth, slapping down on your ass to move and ride his length despite your cries.

“Feel good?” Jeno’s bicep flexes, snaked around your waist tighter than a boa constrictor, making it harder to breathe with the incessant ramming of his hips fucking you up and down his size.

“S-so so so good,” you sigh between tears, scratching your nails through the back of his scalp and sweaty nape. “So good inside.”

He wants to be mean, wants to pull you off him, throw you down on the ground and fuck you like nothing but a useless whore; but he can’t. Mentally cursing himself out, he shifts to lay you down, throwing your thigh around his hip for leverage to grind into you, eyes burning over your dazed expression.

Pretty.

Kissing the backs of his teeth he fucks into you faster, chasing his own need to get off without much concern for yours. This isn’t about you, this isn’t about your glazed gaze, parted swollen lips, the tear tracks rolling down past your jaw following the dips of collarbone rising and falling at a rapid pace, breasts bouncing near out of your dress with each beating thrust.

Jeno feels crazed, hot, throat burning from the inside out from the endless groans tearing through his chest. Bending forward, his weight throttles into you, jostling you to slide up. Palms attaching you to the ground with a vicious chokehold. Teeth grit and grind, wrinkling the skin on his cheeks and forehead, cock fucking in and out, in and out, the loud squelch of wet somehow louder than your pleasured sounds combined.

“M’gonna..” Jeno gulps, swallowing the wads of spit and drool collecting at the sides of his tongue. “Fuck you, fuck you all night. Fuck your ass open, break you.”

Unsure he can even last with how tight you grip around him, Jeno pulls out, shushing the loud whine you let out, pouting and crying harder about how close you were. “Shh..” slapping down between your thighs, he licks at his lips hungrily, entertained by the way you twitch and cry, still lifting your hips for another slap on your pussy. “Turn around.”

Knowing you can’t do much with your arms constrained, he manhandles you onto your front, noting how your flesh folds over the leather belt, sure enough to leave marks behind the more you struggle. He pulls at the leather, shoving your dress to the top of your back completely bunched up, wrinkling the nice material that someone else would have stripped off of you gently..

“Mine.” Jeno swipes his fingers around your exposed rim, lightly laughing at how you jerk forward and arch out more. Cock slapping down between your ass with a hiss. “So pretty like this..”

He’s done bothering to prep you, on the brink of insanity listening to your shattered whimpers, the exhausted, depraved little way you repeat his name. “So mine.” Resting his length on your rim, he reaches lower, scooping a wad of wetness globbed at your entrance, the only extra he’ll spare you, smearing the mess of it up and down his size.

He presses to your rim, biting down on his lip hard enough to break skin and compress the growl trying to escape. “God, fuck.”

Jeno thinks he can’t breathe for a moment, sinking in through the insane tightness, his stomach sucked empty, raggedly inhaling the more inch by inch disappears inside of you.

He thrust shallowly, experimenting with short and fast grinds until every bit of his size can no longer be seen, eyebrows crushed together as he struggles to breathe and crashes a harsh slap down on your ass. The growl escapes similar to a feral animal on the run, animalistic much like each barreling thrust colliding with your ass.

Jeno loses it from there, a string of curses running off his tongue between groans, hammering his hips forward, his free hand reaching for one of your shoulders to press your chest down. The extra hold only enforcing more power behind each slam, burying his cock deeper than you can even begin to fathom. “Gonna fuck your ass all the time now.”

“Hurts! Hurts so much!” You moan, stuttering between each syllable, arching deeper for him to fuck faster.

“You love it.” He bends forward, chest pressed down on your back knocking out your air flow. His other hand trailing from your hip to slap against your cunt, fingers pressing down on your clit and rubbing in fluid motions of figure eights.

“Ah fuck! Baby!”

Jeno knows you’re close, tightening up around his cock making it harder for him to shove in past your resistance. Pussy quivering the more he plays with your clit. “Yeah, just like that.” He pants, thirsty like a dog, tongue wagging out drooling. “Fucking tight, so fucking tight.”

He starts fucking at an unreal speed, rapidly ripping past each clench. The growls behind you akin to a beast, sucking bits of your soul with each thrust bottoming out inside of your ass.

“Jeno!” It’s barely a whimper, too empty headed to process anything beyond the heat coiling down your stomach, toes curling against your heels, the cool wet smeared down your thighs.

A pinch at your clit has you leaking, squirting around nothing and clamping down on the cock filling your ass, Jeno’s hand drenched by your climax pouring to the floor around his fingers.

He can’t believe it, you really came from this, asshole stuffed to the brim with cock for the first time. The thought alone tightens up his balls, jackhammering against your limp frame, falling into sloppy mismatched thrusts until the heat in his chest snaps. Cock crammed down to the hilt jerking and pulsing inside your warm heat. Sticky and obscene, the thick milky cream collecting at the base of his length with each last pitiful thrust.

Jeno finishes up, throat visibly bobbing as he takes in your backside covered in the excess cum, dragging his wet cock on your heated flesh. The white liquid gliding down your soft skin, ass gaped and ruined, his arm reaches around patting for his pants in search of one thing.

Jeno types with one thumb, quickly filming a clip of his hand sweeping up the back of your thigh, rubbing his release into your skin, the last shot ending on your holes.

The text finishes sending, a pleased grin lazily fitting his face before leaning down to kiss the middle of your back.

He mumbles mindlessly against your damp skin, imagining his recipient's face opening the message, pleased by the thought of his father’s enraged face.

‘Only mine.’

[kingofbodyrolls]

Hoseok fic recs 2024 🥳

In honor of Hoseok’s birthday, I want to share my ultimate favorite Hobi stories, that I’ve read this past year (2023-2024) 💜 I want to thank each and every writer on this list for creating such wonderful stories and art - you are truly amazing ✨ All the fics on this list hold a dear place in my heart 🥹

❗Most of these fics are smutty as hell or contains dark themes, so minors dni.❗ 

If you read anything on this list and you like it, please leave a comment to the writer or reblog the fic, it might seem like a tiny gesture, but it really means a lot for writers and I can guarantee it will put a smile on their faces💜 Let’s share and give lots of love! Looking for more to read? Check ‘The Library’ or last years recs 🙂

[index] → jan | feb (💜) | mar (myg) | apr | may | jun | jul | aug | sep (jjk)(knj) | oct (pjm) | nov | dec (kth)(ksj) | Emoji meaning → angst = 🌩️, smut = 🥵, fluff = 🥰, comedy = 😂, yandere = 😈, thriller/dark = 👻, fantasy = 🪄.

⭐Helping Hands by @m-yg93 [6k] // jhs x f.reader // f2l // 🥵

📝 Between your boyfriend getting into bed with another girl and finals taking all your time a cold rift has emerged between the usually warm movie nights with your best friend. Thankfully exams are over and Hoseok is back on your couch where he belongs. When some shit talking gets a little too close to home and Hoseok finds out you’ve never even had an orgasm he decides to take things into his own hands, and yours. 

🗨️ This was so hot, like what 😳🥵 also a bit funny, but mostly smutty 🤭

⭐Flight 18 by @noona-la-la-la [9.5K] // jhs x f. reader // flight!au, idol!au // 🥵😂

📝 Korean Air Flight 18 leaves daily from Los Angeles traveling to Seoul.  You’ve taken this flight before, but this time you’ve got an irritating passenger in the neighboring seat.  Little did you know that he would end up giving you the ride of your life.

🗨️ This was just really really amazing; utterly funny (like I was laughing at certain points), so much sexual tension that evolves into satisfying smut 😗

⭐Ho Ho Horrible @ugh-yoongi [5.6K] // jhs x f.reader // e2l, neighbor!au, holiday!au // 🥵🥰😂

📝 (or, the one where your neighbor is a relentless christmas caroler and refuses to take a hint, but at least he's really hot.)

🗨️ No– this was just so freaking cute! 😭 Like fluffy cute and also extremely funny, just what I love. I loved this so much 💜 OC’s friendship with Tae, their banter was 💯 and then with Hobi, just so so good! It was so cute and OC’s internal dialogue is just funny 😂A really cute holiday themed Hoseok fic that I can’t recommend enough!!!! Everything was just great. Had me smiling and giggling a few times – please go read it 🥹💜

⭐Started with a Sparkle, now we’re on Fire @the-boy-meets-evil [6.5K] // jhs x f.reader // f2l // 🥵

📝 You're feeling self conscious about your recent break-up and hoseok is more than happy to teach you a thing or two.

🗨️ Really really good! I really liked it 💜 I really loved how both sweet and demanding Hoseok was, guiding oc through everything.

⭐Watch Yourself by @boymeetsweevil [7.7k] // jhs x f.reader // non idol au, pwp // 🥵

📝 It starts with an invitation from your ex. It ends with Hoseok’s hands down your pants in said ex’s kitchen.

🗨️ Oh this was hot alright 🥵

⭐In the Car @floralseokjin [14.7K]  // jhs x f.reader // mechanic!hoseok, street racer!au // 🥵🥰🌩️

📝 all you had was a dead car battery, you weren’t looking for romance, regardless if the charming mechanic had other ideas. You’ve heard stories that could put you off… Can he change your misconceptions, or will they prove correct after all…?

🗨️ oh my- really really good 💖 something about mechanic AND street racer Hoseok has me question my sanity 🥵

⭐Two in one @here2bbtstrash [12K] // jhs x f.reader x pjm // best friends!au, threesome // 🥵🥵🥵

📝 you finally have a much-needed smoke session with your best friends, just like old times. you’re also pretty sure they’re gay… right?

🗨️ the chemistry between them, how they have been friends for so long, oc’s assumptions lol, and their humor too! Priceless 👏💖 Gosh! It was pure filth, in the best way possible, so sinful and dirty— and, and—, PLEASE GO READ IT IF YOU HAVEN’T ALREADY 😭💖

⭐Floored @lavienjin [5.2K] // jhs x f.reader x pjm x jjk // idol!au, established relationship with Hobi, foursome // 🥵🥵🥵

📝 in the midst of your reunion with your boyfriend after not seeing each other for some time, you’re interrupted by two sets of eyes. not wanting to waste the opportunity, hoseok proposes a foursome and hey, “the more, the merrier”, right?

🗨️ what did I even read? 🥵 (it was good!)

⭐Good Morning @ppersonna [2.1K] // jhs x f.reader // established relationship // 🥵🥰

📝 hoseok’s methods of waking you up are … unconventional, but effective.

🗨️ omg I loved it 💖💯

⭐To the Beat of my Heart @jeonggukingdom [7.2K] // jhs x f.reader // dancer!au, sort of e2l // 🥵

📝 when you walk into the studio that Sunday afternoon, all you expect is a lonely and chill practice session but, a few hours later, your programs are shattered in thousand pieces by the unexpected presence of Jung Hoseok. And nothing could have prepared you for what he had in store for you.

🗨️ wow, this was incredibly good! Well written and it was just so freaking hot, I loved it! 💯✨

⭐Holiday Inn @bangtanintotheroom [36.6K] // jhs x f.reader // non-idol!au, rap group!au, s2e2l // 🥵😂

📝 if it’s not the loud music, it’s the constant rapping. If it’s not the constant rapping, it’s the hysterical laughter. And if it’s not the hysterical laughter, it’s the moaning and screaming women. How the hell hasn’t your neighbor been kicked out yet? Oh right; he’s a beloved rapper.  

🗨️ I’m just— WOW 🤯💯 This must be one of the best Hoseok fics I’ve ever read. Damn it was fucking amazing 👏 I loved the assertiveness of reader, and how that tension just build so fucking perfectly! Everything was so freaking good. A masterpiece!! 💜✨

⭐Make Me @violetsiren90 [16k] // jhs x f.reader // idol!au, f2fwb, BDSM lifestyle // 🥵🥵🥵

📝 You’ve been friends with Hobi for years, and he’s your comfort zone - but when he gets wind of a dark secret you drunkenly let slip, things between you take a sudden extreme change.

🗨️ Oh. My.Goodness. My soul left my body multiple times when I read this!!! It is incredible!!! Really love this one, and if you like BDSM this is definitely for you, but even if you don’t (like me, this was out of my ‘comfort zone’) you will still enjoy it ✨👏💯

And as a something a little extra, here’s a few fics that I haven’t had the time to read yet, but damn I’m buzzing to get to read them:

Sonic Rain [25k] @jungblue

The Retreat [19.6k] @ugh-yoongi

Fake Love [16.2k] @aquaminwrites

The Night Shift [11k] @prolixitae

The Treasured Thief [16k] @justimajin

Happy birthday HOBI!!!! 🥳💜✨

[userpedros]

personal stash || joel miller

pairing: Joel x female!reader

summary: Joel decides after patrol it'd be a good idea to steal from Ellie's stash and things get a lil heated.

word count: 6k+

authors note: I wrote this in pretty much one go, so it is what it is. has not been beta read, barely proofread - mostly skimmed. also, Joel isn't as much of a hardass in this because he deserves a break okay. my mans gotta be tired from always being so angry.

warnings & content : 18+. Incredibly mature themes. Mentions and use of marijuana. established friendship. age gap (15+ years (honestly probably more like 20 but)), smut, fingering, unprotected p in v, oral - fem receiving, creampie-ish, slight cum eating, slight choking. pet names (dirty and nice!) (lemme know if i missed anything!)

“Are you sure she’s not going to notice, Joel? She’s your daughter, she’s pretty observant.” You looked over at Joel, giving him the side eye as he brought the lighter up to the end of the joint. You placed it between your lips as he lit the end, the tip illuminating a bright red before you inhaled, the end of the joint finalizing into a smokeable piece. You inhaled as Joel watched you, taking a deep breath in, holding it, and letting it out. The smoke began to curl and fill the air as Joel began to answer your question.

“’ M positive. Do y'think she’d ever suspect me? Nah. I reckon she'll suspect you.” He winked as he took the joint from your fingers, his large ones making the joint look minuscule between them. He inhaled, his eyebrows furrowing as he closed his eyes, and leaned his head back. As he breathed the thick smoke out, he sat back up, staring straight into your soul.

His salt and pepper brown hair tousled, strands going about every which way. His brown eyes looked you up and down as you took your turn with the spliff.

“Why ever would she suspect me?” Your eyebrows rose as you inhaled, and watched him watch you. “I don’t live with her.” You exhaled on the last part, watching his every move as he scooted a bit closer to you.

“I live with her but I’m not the one she usually smokes with on patrol, sweetheart.” He cocks an eyebrow and smirks as your face falls.

Your high was already beginning to settle in. You drank his words in as you realized that he paid a little more attention to you than you had originally thought. The couch in his living room began to swallow you whole as you began to drift into thought from his statement.

You were a lot younger than Joel. He was in his early fifties and well, you were a little far off from there. You’d just moved to Jackson, stumbling upon it with a group you’d been with, when you decided to stay and they decided not to. You’d made a lot of friends, weirdly enough, his surrogate daughter being one of them. Her and Dina had become like family to you, and you’d been like family to them. You’d become close enough to them that you’d obviously been spending time with Ellie’s makeshift father after your patrols together.

You had to admit, the way that Joel talked, with that Texan accent, absolutely melted you. The way he cared for Ellie, made you absolutely gooey inside. There was so much about him to like, that you couldn’t decide what you didn’t like. Well maybe besides his absolutely shit attitude sometimes but that had really grown on you too.

You knew it was probably a bit weird to be falling for your good friend’s dad, maybe to Ellie, but it had honestly started to happen before you’d even really become friends with her. But you couldn’t think about that right now because well, you were already spacing out and Joel was definitely onto you.

“You alright there?” He waved a large hand in your face as you came back to Earth. You shook your head as you looked back into his brown eyes once more before speaking.

“I’m just peachy, Joel. Just peachy.” You beamed a great big smile, or what you thought was great while he snickered at you. He coughed into his hand to hide his laughter. “What are you laughing at Miller?”

You frowned a little as you grabbed the joint from his hand, taking another few hits before handing it back.

“Ellie was right. You can't handle your weed well.” He shook his head as he peeled off his tan jacket and leaned back into the sofa. You craned your head to the side as you scoffed, dramatically jumping to sit sideways so you could look him in the eye.

As you sat cross-legged next to him, he lifted his eyebrow again and took the joint from your small fingertips. He had to lean a little to get to it, and his hand brushed against yours as he removed the burning flower from your fingers, stubbing it out in the ashtray in front of you both on the coffee table.

The brush of your skin against his sent a burning sensation throughout your body. He seemed to notice it too, never taking his eyes off yours as he grabbed onto your leg and scooted you closer to him. The area on your leg he had just been touching still seared after he removed his hand.

“I may not be able to handle my weed well, Miller, but hey, tryin’ counts for somethin’ right?” You leaned your head against the couch, watching his every move as your knee brushed against his leg.

You let it sit there for a second as he leaned his head back against the cushions and closed his eyes. He mumbled something under his breath, which you ignored as you closed your eyes. You both sat like that for a few minutes, your highs beginning to take over you both.

You and Joel had recently started to become close as you’d been with Ellie. You started taking over some patrol shifts for her whenever she wanted to spend time with Dina, and she’d taken some for you. She’d also known that you had a slight crush on Joel so she liked to call it a bit of charity that she’d extended. But she’d never tell you that she was moving patrol shifts around on purpose. She liked how you looked at Joel. He deserved someone that was compassionate, caring, and able to stand up to him when need be. You were also incredibly gorgeous so that didn’t hurt.

You’d really started to get a handle on how to talk to Joel, and he had started to learn how to talk to you. He knew, hell, everyone knew that you’d had a crush on him. It wasn’t just Ellie. It didn’t help that your face was totally readable, every emotion that you ever felt splayed across your face, even when you were trying to be discrete.

You came back to Earth a few minutes after you both had leaned your heads into the couch. The weed had been a nice way to relax after a long night of patrol. Joel had the bright idea to come back to his place and take some from Ellie’s stash, claiming that it was okay because he’d given up so many Chef Boyardee cans to her on the road so many years ago, it was the least she could do for her dear old dad.

Of course, you laughed when he said that. Rolling your eyes and blushing at the way he smiled when he talked about Ellie. The way he cared for her light a fire in you that you didn’t know existed. To see how much he’d given for the ones he loved was an attractive quality. Loyalty was important to you, especially in the world you were in now.

Joel patted you on the leg, bringing you back to reality as you lazily picked your head up to look at him.

“You alright there, lightweight?” Joel laughed as he scanned your face, taking in how happy you looked in the moment you were in. Your smile was bright and wide, something he’d grown used to in the past few months.

“’M great.” You went to speak again but a loud crash sent both of your heads whirling towards the direction the noise came from.

Of course. It was the cat Ellie had insisted Joel rescue from the cold Wyoming nights that had the ground blanketed in snow. He’d told her it was a waste of time, the kitten was completely feral but Ellie brought it home anyway, and of course Joel was unable to say no to her.

The bright orange cat mewled as he knocked over yet another small stack of books, looking back towards Joel as if to say, ‘look at what I just did.’

Joel groaned as he watched the cat knock off a small candle, going to get up to scare off the feline.

“Leave him alone. He just wants your attention. He knows you hate him so he just does this to piss you off.” You shrugged, grabbing Joel’s arm and pulling him back onto the couch.

“Y'see, I hate that damn cat. He’s always breakin’ shit and then I'm havin' to clean it up. Should’ve never let Ellie bring him home.” He groaned as he looked over at you, a smile breaking across his face as you both heard another crash from the dining area.

You both cracked up as the cat really began to howl, trying to steal the show and attention, which it seemed he was successful at.

You realized your hand was still on Joel’s arm, and you went to remove it but you decided to leave it there as you spoke. You squeezed his arm as your words spilled out of your mouth. “You let her keep it cause you’re a softie Miller.” His eyes went wide as you continued, the word vomit now unable to stop as your high took over. “But that’s not a bad thing, it’s actually really attractive how much you care for-.”

That’s when he cut you off. His hand flew to your mouth as he leaned over you. His eyebrows were scrunched together again, in his signature stare that he usually wore when he tried to close himself off.

“I’m gonna stop you right there, peach, I’m not a softie.” He leaned back as his skin burned into yours. He finally removed his hand, your mouth still feeling like it was on fire. His scent was assaulting your nostrils from being so close to him. Everything smelled like thick amber and pine.

It seemed that he had chosen to ignore the second thing you’d said, which you were grateful for, considering you had definitely not been thinking when it slipped out.

You snorted as you finally realized what he’d just said. “Okay, sure. If you’re not a softie, then I must really need glasses, my vison must be incredibly foggy.” You laughed as he continued to look irritated.

“You do have foggy vision, sweets. That’s why I do most of the work when we’re on patrol.” He rolled his eyes as he continued, “Hard for you to see what’s out there in plain sight when you’re too busy starin’ at me the whole time.”

With his last sentence, he began to smirk as your eyes grew wide. Well, can’t say you didn’t walk yourself right into that one.

You watched as his brown eyes watched you. It was now a game of who was going to talk first. Was his thick Texan accent going to be the first sound in the room or was it going to be your quiet voice?

Luckily for you, it was the stupid cat again. The reason this whole conversation had taken a turn. He jumped right into your lap and nuzzled into your hand as Joel continued to watch you. You both continued to stare directly into each other’s eyes as the feline called for attention in your lap.

After a few seconds of unrequited feelings on your end, the cat took off, leaving you both sitting there, still staring, neither of you saying a word. The smoke still lightly hung in the air; the lamp next to you illuminating the small space. The air was thick with tension and you decided it was time to speak. It didn’t seem that Joel was going to be the next one to talk as he carefully watched you, his eyebrows reaching the top of his forehead.

Your voice was barely a squeak as you finally spoke. “You mean to tell me you’ve noticed the whole time?” You cringed, breaking eye contact as you looked down at the worn, brown couch. “You really just let me stare at you the whole time and never said or did anything.”

You whistled as you began to get your bearings and deciding maybe it was time to go. The tension in the air was awkward for you and uncomfortable. It was finally noticeable to you now how obvious your small crush had been and well, you were a little embarrassed. That meant he didn’t feel the same way, if he’d known the whole damn time and never done a single thing.

“Well, I guess I should get going, it’s getting kind of late. Not to mention I’m completely embarrassed now.” You went to stand up, not moving your eyes to his when he gripped onto your leg.

“Didn’t ever say anything to you darlin’ 'cause I was a bit worried where it might go if I did.”

With his words, your eyes shot back to his once more. The weed took control, your confidence soaring as you sat back onto the couch. It was now or never and you were going for now.

“Let’s pretend you’re not worried, where would it go?” You grabbed his hand, latching onto that small piece of courage you had and laced your fingers with his. He gripped onto your hand as you set your joined palms in your lap. “I’m curious.”

You watched as he stared down at where your hands were joined, the tension in the air changing to something else, thicker, desire seeping over every pore in your body. Joel’s body language began to mirror yours as his eyes began to fill with something darker, his pupils dilating as he looked back to you.

“It might go a lil’ somethin’ like this.” With that, he leaned forward and crashed his lips to yours, instantly sealing the deal, that your relationship with him would be forever changed. You two would never be able to turn back now. Especially not when you kissed him back and pulled his bottom lip through your teeth, earning a groan from Joel.

He pulled back instantly, a pang of sadness filling you as he did. You already missed the feeling of him on your lips, it was an instant connection you’d never felt with anyone before, and it all happened within a single kiss and a split second.

“’M not sure we should be doin’ this. 'S not a good idea.” He shook his head as he started to stand up, your hand still in his. You refused to let go as you looked at him bewildered. You nodded for him to sit back down and words spilled out of your mouth again.

“You can’t just kiss me like that and then get up to go, telling me it’s a bad idea without even telling me why.” You shook your head as he continued to stand, his hand still in yours, watching your every move. His long-sleeved green flannel looked worn and tight against his arms, a small hole in his bicep now becoming your focal point. The embarrassment overshadows the fleeting confidence you just had.

His face became hard as he removed his hand from yours, placing it in his pocket. Your hand grew cold instantly from the lack of heat, falling into your lap. Sadness sank deep into the pit of your stomach. You weren’t sure how the night had gotten turned around like this but you just wanted to go back to how it had started. You wanted to go back to just being a young idiot who pined after a man old enough to be her father. It was simple and easy to do, but now you were stuck somewhere you didn’t know if you’d be able to pull yourself and Joel out of.

“I’m not good enough for you and you’re too young for me.” He turned around, walked over to where the cat had knocked things over, and picked them up. You watched the whole time, waiting for him to continue because surely, he had much better reasons than those.

But the other reasons never came out of his mouth. You watched as Joel began to build his walls up again. The same ones you had worked so incredibly hard to tear down.

You took a deep breath in as you decided you weren’t going to let this be it. You were done pining. You were either going to go home tonight and know that there would never be a chance in hell for you to be any sort of anything with Joel, or you were going to go home tonight knowing that something good was going to come out of this. Something had too.

You stood up and made your way over to where he was leaning against the dining room table.

“I know you’re not old enough to be losin’ your fuckin’ mind, Joel, because those are the lamest excuses I’ve ever fuckin’ heard.” You crossed your arms as you watched his back straighten through the worn flannel. His knees locked in his worn jeans that you loved so much.

“We live in a world where there’s goddamn mushrooms controlling and eating people. I don’t think it matters how old you are in a world like this.” You shook your head as he turned slowly, his gaze sweeping over to you. “I could give less than a single shit if you think you’re good enough for me. If I think you are, why question it? We’re in the fucking apocalypse for Christ's Sake! I don’t think there’s a single person left who is inherently good.”

You let out the long breath you’d been keeping in, not noticing how loud your voice had risen as you waited for him to speak. He had turned around and he was just staring at you now, leaning up against the dining room table, staring you down.  He stood there for a few minutes, contemplating his next move before finally standing up and walking over to you, his tall figure towering over you.

“Good god, you’ve got a mouth on you.” He grabbed your hip with one hand as he tugged you into him. “You done now or are you goin’ t’ yell at me some more, sweetheart?”

You looked up at him, pulling yourself together, and taking a deep breath before speaking. “I think I’m done now.” You linked your arms around his waist as you watched him. You guessed that your tiny little rant had changed his mind. You weren’t going to question it.

“Wise choice, darlin'.’” And with that, he crashed his lips onto yours, taking you completely off guard.

Your lips melded into his as you two began to basically swallow each other whole. You didn’t know where either of you began as he flipped you around to where he was. He walked you backward, still keeping his mouth on yours, biting down on your lower lip as you hit the edge of the dining table behind you.

He lifted you onto the table in one swift motion, earning a grunt from you as your bottom hit the wood beneath you.

You pulled away for a second to say, “Not bad lifting skills for such an ‘old man’.” You giggled as you watched his gaze harden as he looked down at you. He pulled your hips into his, his growing erection visible as it strained beneath his jeans.

“I thought you said you were done talkin’? Do I need to shut you up again?” His fingertips pressed into your hips as his hold on you hardened.

“I think you might hav-“ He cut you off mid-sentence, placing his mouth on yours once more.

He pulled back slightly to say one last thing before his tongue delved back into your mouth.

“We only have so much time before Ellie gets home from hangin’ out with Dina. So do me a favor pretty girl, cut the chit-chat.” He lifted his hand, bringing it to your chin, grabbing it harshly as he angled your head up more. “I still have yet to have my midnight snack. I get real hungry after I smoke.”

You shivered with his words as they left his mouth.

"You sure you wanna do this on your dining table, Joel?" You whispered, the words barely leaving your mouth. They hung like ghosts in the air as you waited for his response.

"Dinin' table is where you're meant to eat, ain't it?" He looked down at you with an eyebrow cocked. His words hung proudly in the air. You both eagerly closed the distance between you two once more, your mouths melding together once again as if they belonged together. You were sure nothing would ever feel like this again, the feeling of his lips on yours.

You grabbed ahold of his shirt and pulled him into you more, leaning back with every pull into him, until your back hit the cool wooden surface of the table. As it did, you groaned, Joel collapsing on top of you.

He leaned back a little, pulling his mouth from yours as he eyed the long sleeve shirt you had on.

“Hope you’re not too attached to this.” He grunted as he grabbed the neck of the fabric. His knuckles rapped along your skin as he tore the material down the middle, opening you wide to his gaze. He reached his hand into the back of the torn fabric and unhooked your bra, ripping the fabric from your body and tossing it behind him into the living room somewhere. You both went wide-eyed as you heard the clasp of your bra hit the lamp, toppling the feeble piece of furniture over.

“Oops.” Was all you managed to get out as you pulled him back to you. His lips went straight to your chest, taking one hardened pink peak into his mouth, sending your head flying back, hitting the hard wood. You didn’t even care about how bad that had hurt as he nipped and sucked. You only cared about how good it felt to have Joel’s mouth on you.

You let out a string of curse words as he pulled your nipple between his teeth, looking up at you. He than began to kiss his way down to your navel, stopping just above your pant line.

He unbuckled your pants, his lips hovering over your stomach. As you helped him shimmy yourself out of your jeans, they fell onto the floor with a smack.

He leaned down, kneeling before you as he ran a finger over your slit through your panties.

“They don’t sell things like this in Jackson, where’d these come from pretty girl?” His accent was thick as he continued running his finger over you through the lacey material of your thong.

“I’d have to kill you if I told you.” You breathed out. He smirked as he tore them down as your words left your mouth. Your slick heat glistened under the only light left in the room, the small lamp that illuminated the dining room.

In all reality, you’d just stolen the pair from an abandoned Victoria’s Secret before you’d arrived in Jackson. You never really wore them but you were glad you’d decided to take a chance tonight.

He whistled as he stared directly into your heat, rocking back on his knees a little. “Look at how ready y'are for me already. Needy little thing.”

You whined, smacking him on the shoulder, barely able to reach. “Joel.” Your breath was incredibly labored as you watched him trace over your slit once more. He traced back down, entering one finger into your pussy.

He watched you as he tunneled his finger in and out of you, curling it to hit your sensitive spot each time, earning moans from you with each stroke.

You were getting louder as he continued to stroke his finger in and out of you, the wet sounds coming from you filling the room along with your moans.

He added a second finger, mumbling a string of curse words to himself. You dared yourself to look down at him and it was the best sight you’d ever seen. He was on his knees directly in front of your aching pussy, staring down at it like it was the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen.

His fingers that were driving in and out of you were slick and glistening. As soon as he saw you staring down at him, he did something even better than what he was doing at the current moment. He leaned up and attached his mouth directly to your swollen clit and began to take turns sucking and licking.

"'S sweet for me, don't think it gets much better than this." His breath was hot on you, making it impossible to breath, only adding to the pleasure.

You couldn’t think straight, you closed your eyes and let your head hit the table once more, crying out as Joel continued to go to town on you.

“That’s it, pretty girl. Wanna hear you.” Joel whispered into your pussy as his fingers sped up, scissoring in and out of you.

“I’m pretty sure the whole town can fuckin’ hear me Joel, no need to worry.” You whined out, grabbing onto the sides of the table your knuckles turning white.

He continued for another minute, tantalizing your very near and pending orgasm before he abruptly stopped. Of course he stopped right when you couldn’t stop muttering his name. He knew you were close and It didn’t seem as though he was going to let you have it.

“Why’d you stop?” You whined out once more as you started to sit up, but were pushed down with Joel’s hand that wasn’t covered in you.

“Don’t need that bad attitude, sweet girl. Need ya to be loud for me. Want the whole neighborhood to hear what I’m doing to you.” He chuckled as he moved his glistening hand up and moved it to right in front of your mouth. “Now open wide, want you to taste how sweet you are for me.”

His fingers nudged at your mouth, you took them in, swallowing and sucking your residue off of him, maintaining eye contact with him the entire time.

“'S my good girl,” Joel muttered as he continued to watch you.

You swirled your tongue around his fingers one last time tasting your tangy residue and let his fingers go with a pop.

He leaned back and started to unbutton his shirt, beginning to pull it off.

“Oh that’s right Miller, give me a strip tease.” You whopped as he glared at you, stopping what he was doing.

“You’re annoying, you know that?” He huffed as he stared you down.

You giggled as he started to take his clothes off again, shedding the plaid and yanking his pants down. It was truly a sight to see and you were so grateful for the show.  You watched with anticipation, biting your bottom lip as he kicked off his pants and threw them behind him. He stalked over to you before yanking you to him without warning. You hadn’t even really had time to admire how incredibly thick he was. As you slid towards him, your ass hanging off the table as your groin smacked into his.

“You’ve got such a sweet little pussy darlin, can’t imagine how good she’s gonna feel if she tasted that great.” He grunted as you sat up on your elbows to be closer to him.

He leaned back down, taking your mouth in his once more. One of his hands snaked around and grabbed your neck, his hand now your own personal necklace. He squeezed lightly and you moaned into the kiss. He snapped his hips into you when the sound escaped your throat.

His stiff erection was now pressed into your hot, dripping center. The feeling of his thick cock strained against you was sending you into a frenzy. You broke the kiss as you leaned back as much as his hand on your throat would allow.

You looked down at where your hips met and moaned again, the sight was so incredibly hot to you, you didn’t know if you would be able to take it when he finally pushed himself inside of you.

“Admirin’ the view, you filthy little thing?” He moved his free hand to grip his cock, stepping back slightly.

He gripped his length and smacked it against your clit, sending curse words out of your lips and his. He dragged his thick length down your slit and back up again, collecting your juices on his tip. He smacked your clit once more, sending your head snapping back.

It was all too much, the feeling of his hand on your neck, his thick dick hitting your sensitive bud. You knew he wanted you to beg. Hell, the man made you beg for him to do the stupidest shit whenever you were on patrol together. You didn’t know if you should appease him or wait for him to spell it out for you. Luckily you didn’t have to because Joel seemed to be impatient enough this time.

With one final smack and a gasp from both of your lips, he ran his cock down your slit one last time before positioning it at your entrance. He looked from where you two were about to join and into your eyes.

“Y'ready? Y'sure about this? We’ll never be able to go back to how it was after this darlin’.” He huffed out as he waited for your answer. "Gonna have t'have this pussy every time we're on patrol now."

“’M sure, Joel. I’ve been waitin’ for this for a while. Need your thick cock, baby.” You whined once more as he started to push himself in.

“Oh god, don’t think I’ve ever wanted to hear somethin’ more darlin.'” And with that he pushed himself completely in, bottoming out inside of you. “Good lord, you are something else. So fuckin’ tight.” He gritted through his teeth as he pushed out and back into you.

You both watched where the two of you were joined, enjoying the view as he continued to pump himself in and out of you at a slow speed. It was so incredibly hot to you. His thick length tunneling in and out of you, looking like it belonged there. It stretched you out completely, filling you in a way you didn’t know was possible. You were pretty sure you could die happy right now with Joel Miller’s cock stuffing you full.

“Holy fuck Joel. You’re so big.” With that you looked back up at him, your eyes completely wide as he continued to watch himself. You watched as he brought one of his hands around and grabbed your right leg and hoisted it over his shoulder.

He hit a completely new spot with this position, getting a deeper and better spot with each thrust.

"And you're so incredibly tight, can't believe I waited this long t'have you."

He brought his other hand around to your front, his calloused thumb ghosting over your clit. His rough pad began to rub small circles, causing your head to snap back once more.

You kept yourself balanced on your elbows and brought your head back up, looking at him as he looked up at you.

“Ain’t nothin’ ever felt this good before wrapped around me darlin’.” He grunted, whistling immediately after as he continued to stare you down. “’M hooked on you now, pretty girl.”

You let yourself fall backward as he leaned forward, keeping a finger on your clit, still rubbing small circles, driving you absolutely mad. His lips ghosted over yours and he held himself there. His eyes screwed shut as his rhythm began to pick up.

“Holy shit Joel, don’t know how much more I can take.” You managed to squeak out.

“Is my cock too much for ya? That’s too damn bad, I’m never givin’ her up now. Gonna make her mine, make her full of me.” His breath was hot on your mouth.

You cried out as he continued to hit the most sensitive spot in your cut, you were getting so close, especially with his finger on your clit.

"Look at how drunk you're gettin' on my cock, takin' it so well for me."

You couldn’t hold it in anymore. You began to grow louder with each thrust until you suddenly burst, stars and blackness clouding your vision. You started to collapse and fall backward but Joel moved a hand from your leg and placed it behind you, steadying you.

“Mmm, couldn’t wait for me could ya?” He sent a smack down to your clit, removing his fingers. You were still convulsing with aftershocks so the smack to your sensitive only added to the experience, making the stars in your vision explode.

His groans began to grow louder as he got closer to his release. His pace sloppier as his cock started to twitch inside of you.

Suddenly, he started to explode inside of you, painting your walls with his thick cum. He pulled out just as it started and started to cum all over the outside of your pussy, he drug some up to your stomach as he rested his length there for just a second.

You were finally starting to come back to life when you noticed how incredibly sticky you were about to be.

You swopped your pointer finger down to the small little pile of cum that had collected right underneath your belly button and ran your finger through it, collecting it pad of your finger. You brought that finger to your mouth and sucked the sticky sweet residue off as he watched. His eyes grew wide and his eyebrows shot to the top of his forehead.

“You tasted me, Miller. It was only fair I get to do the same. I’ve gotta say, we taste so good together.” You moaned out the last part, watching as his pupils dilate with your words.

“Fuck, sweetheart. Gotta give an old man a second to recover before you say shit like that.” He looked away from you as he whistled out, grabbing his boxers off the floor, bringing them up to you, and cleaning you off.

You let him swipe the thin cotton material over your sensitive parts, breathing out as your swollen pussy was taken care of by him. As soon as you were cleaned up, Joel motioned for you to come closer to where he was, getting up off the table. You obeyed and walked over to where he was standing. Your legs were weak and wobbly, which Joel took notice of.

“Care for some help there darlin'?” He said, looking down at you. You just nodded as you held your arms up. You two seemed to understand each other because he swooped you up off your feet and carried you up the stairs, stopping in front of his door when you heard the door below you slam. You were naked, curled up in Joel’s arms as he held you and his boxer briefs, which he’d used to clean you up.

As the door slammed, Joel pushed into his room, tossing his briefs somewhere before shutting the door behind him. You were tired from the long shift of patrol and your vigorous nighttime activity so you were beginning to fall asleep in Joel’s arms. You couldn’t even seem to care that your clothes were strewn apart on the living room floor downstairs, giving whoever had just walked in a hint as to what the previous activities had just been.

He laid you down on his bed and tucked you in under the covers. The soft cotton and smell of Joel overtook you fast. You heard a whistle coming from outside the door, as Joel tugged on his sweatpants. His bedroom door opened as he left the room. All you could hear was Ellie giving Joel shit and him rushing down the stairs to gather all of the articles of clothing you two had left strewn about. You tried to keep your eyes open but with the high still lingering in your head and your body completely worn out, it was pretty impossible. You waited for a second as you heard his feet pound up the stairs. The door opened and a pile of clothes fell onto the floor in front of the door, Joel coming in and closing it behind him.

You watched with hooded eyes as he climbed into bed from the other side. He pulled you into him, resting your head on his chest.

“I had fun tonight.” You managed to say before closing your eyes. You took in his scent once more and the feel of his chest against your cheek before you began to drift off into sleep. Joel said something back to you but you were unable to hear it as you drifted off, grateful for weed and grateful for dining room tables.

[justagalwhowrites]

Nobody's Soldier

As a FEDRA officer, you really shouldn't be friends with Tommy Miller. But as you both struggle to survive in the QZ, that doesn't seem to make a difference.

Pairing: Tommy Miller x Female FEDRA Officer Reader

Warnings: SMUT! Unprotected P in V sex, breeding kink if you squint, oral sex (f receiving), mention of just all the shit that goes with surviving in a QZ, No use of Y/N, 18+ only, Minors DNI

Length: 6k

A/N: I kept thinking about this idea after hearing Hozier's latest so... I wrote it. I hope you like it!

Main Masterlist

It was well past curfew when you got to Tommy Miller’s apartment but that didn’t matter. At least, not for you. FEDRA officers didn’t have to worry about things like curfew. 

You pounded on the door, thankful for the sound of rain and thunder covering the noise, fist meeting the wood again and again until he opened it. 

“Well hi there GI Jane,” he said, looking damn near cocky as he leaned against the doorframe. “What can I do for FEDRA’s finest this evening?” 

“Fuck off, Miller,” you snapped, pushing past him and into his dingy apartment, pulling off your wet hat and dropping it on the beat up table just inside the door before you started pacing. It didn’t take long to cross the combined living room and kitchen, hands in fists at your sides. 

“Somethin’ on your mind there?” Tommy teased, closing the door and watching you pace. You glared at him, at the smug expression on his stupidly handsome face. But the look slipped, his chocolate brown eyes softening, his hands going into his pockets. “Sorry, not tryin’ to make fun if there’s something actually going on. Talk to me, honey.” 

You walked the length of the room one more time, eyes darting toward Tommy as you did before stopping near the table, arms crossed over your chest, trying to decide if you could do this. If you could really do this. 

It felt like you could. If you believed this feeling you got whenever you were anywhere near him, you would do just about anything for him. 

You’d known Tommy and his older brother, Joel, for years now. It hadn’t been on purpose, of course. No one in your position would seek out a connection with the Miller brothers on purpose. But you’d been patrolling the night you met them, when they were coming back from a run and you found them, scrambling below the fence, Joel with blood dripping from his leg. 

“Fuck,” Tess, their smuggling partner said, putting her hands up when your flashlight beam fell on them. 

You’d expected Tess and Tommy to take off, to leave the man who was bleeding and limping for you to contend with and save themselves. But they didn’t. Tess stood her ground, her chin defiant and held high, and Tommy stepped between you and his brother, his hands up, too. 

“Know you’re just doin’ your job,” he said. “We don’t want to cause any trouble. We got plenty of pills that you can have if you just forget this ever happened.” 

You frowned, looking between him and Tess. 

“I don’t want your fucking pills…”

“Cards, then,” Tess said, cutting you off. “We can also get you cigarettes, liquor…” 

You rolled your eyes and Tommy seemed to realize then that bribing you wasn’t going to get them far. He’d always seen you clearly, even from that first meeting he saw you.

“We’re just tryin’ to make a living,” he said quietly. “Life’s hard here. You know that. C’mon, GI Jane. Can’t you just… let us go?” 

You looked at him for a moment. You hated this part of the job, the one where you were supposed to turn in people who were just trying to survive the end of the world. It’s not like they were raping or murdering or even, from what you could see, running some sort of gang. Turning them in wouldn’t help anyone. And there was something about the man in front of you, something about the softness in his brown eyes and the kindness in his face. 

“Keep your hands up,” you said, lowering your gun and taking out your scanner. You checked each of them. Unauthorized exit but no sign of infection. You didn’t give a shit about the unauthorized exit part. You sighed and put the scanner away. 

“You’re cutting it awful fucking close on curfew,” you said, grabbing a note pad and writing a pass to get the elder Miller in at the clinic without too many questions. You handed it to Tommy. “Get him to a doctor and try to get off the streets before someone fucking arrests you.” 

He smiled, taking the note, looking you up and down as he did. 

“Thanks,” he said. “Appreciate it.” 

It was your first run in with the three of them but not your last. It wasn’t always sneaking out or back in. Sometimes, it was some brawl that your unit got called in to break up. Others, it was them in unauthorized areas. Once, it was because they were in lock up when you came by to drop off actual dangerous people. Every time, it pissed you off. Every time, you knew Tommy was better than this. He was oddly optimistic for a person who’d survived the end of the world, something about him giving you hope for this dying species. Every time you saw him in some compromising position, you worried it would be the last time, that he’d get himself killed doing something reckless and stupid when you weren’t there to bail him out. 

Eventually, you got sick of them cutting it too close for comfort and showed up at Tommy and Joel’s door, much like you had tonight, knocking until Tommy answered. 

“Hey,” he frowned when he saw you. “What…” 

You shoved a piece of paper with your work schedule into his hands. 

“Don’t try to come and go from the QZ outside of these times,” you snapped. “I can’t fucking cover for you if I’m not there to do it and they’re going to crack down eventually and I don’t want to see you in lock up for the rest of your life. Got it?” 

He looked down, reading the paper, a slow smile spreading across his face before looking back at you. 

“You’re worried about me,” he smirked. 

“Don’t read into it,” you rolled your eyes, turning to go. But he caught your wrist, stopping you. You frowned, looking down at his fingers around your arm before looking back at him. “What?” 

“Thank you,” he said, those damn eyes of his all soft and earnest. “You’re probably saving my life and my brother’s life, too.”

“I know,” you said quietly. “Try not to blow it, OK?” 

His eyes drifted to your lips for a moment before finding yours again. 

“OK.” 

There started to be more formal lines of communication then, the two of you meeting in secret a few times a month to exchange information. Eventually, it became more than that. There were the intimate touches - your hand on his bicep or his on the small of your back. Tommy started to bring you little gifts, things he thought you’d enjoy from the outside - books, CDs, a set of colored pencils, a bottle of wine. 

“I dunno if we should keep doing this,” he said one day, quietly, as the two of you stood in an alcove in part of the QZ that FEDRA had largely given up on. You always ditched your uniform before going to meet him. That day, it was late July and the heat oppressive, leaving you in a tank top with a loose skirt so you wouldn’t sweat to death. 

“If you mean you should stop risking your life for ration cards, we’re in agreement,” you said wryly. 

He glared at you. 

“I mean,” he said. “I’m worried I’m gonna get you into trouble.” 

“Tommy…” 

“Don’t act like I’m crazy for thinkin’ it,” he cut you off. “They catch you colluding with me? They’ll kill you.” 

“Please,” you waved him off. “Guards buy from smugglers all the time, it’s not like…” 

“I’m not just smuggling anymore,” he said. “I’m tryin’… I’m tryin’ to do the right thing for the QZ. For…” his voice trailed off, looking you up and down before casting his eyes to the ground. “For everyone. I get caught, they find out you’re involved? They’ll kill you.” 

You frowned, everything taking a moment to click. 

“You’re a fucking Firefly.” You didn’t ask it. You didn’t need to. But the look on his face when he raised his eyes to yours told you that you were right. “Goddammit, Miller! What the fuck are you thinking? You know they don’t have a shot in hell at doing anything worthwhile! FEDRA is a fact of life at this point, just like cordyceps, just like the shit rations, just like the sun fucking rising and the seasons changing! You’re just going to get yourself killed and for what? For some fantasy world that’s impossible? You can’t just do that! Your life is worth so much more than that, you’re worth so much more than that I’m not going to just let you…” 

He cut you off with a kiss, backing you into the wall behind you but catching your head with his large hand before it smacked into the brick. You kissed him back, your arms going around his neck, pulling him close and tight as his tongue dipped into your mouth. Your fingers tangled in his hair as he devoured you and his hand ran down your body to your ass, your thigh, fingers sinking into the thick of your leg to hitch you up and over his hip as he ground himself against your already aching center. You groaned into his mouth at the feel of him, hard against your sex and you rolled your hips against him, finally giving into the heat of want that had been rising for him for the years you’d known him. 

“Fuck,” he breathed, pulling back from you enough to speak but keeping his forehead pressed against yours, his eyes searching your own. “Can I…” 

“Do whatever you want,” you panted, desperate to kiss him again. “I don’t care, I just want you, I…” 

He didn’t give you a chance to finish, kissing you again, pressing you harder against that brick wall before reaching between the two of you to free his cock and shove your panties to the side and then he was in you, the thick heft of him forcing your walls apart sharp and hard, stretching you open and easing the ache inside. 

Tommy moaned and stilled when fully sheathed in you, panting into your mouth as your body adjusted to the size of him. 

“Goddamn you feel good,” he said, pressing himself deep, making your breath hitch. “Fuck, so fucking good.” 

He kissed you again before fucking into you hard, fast, urgent. It was heady, intense, but you knew it had to go quick, you were exposed here, just one idiot turning down the wrong alley and you’d be discovered. 

That, though, just seemed to add to the thrill. The leg that he’d tugged over his hip tightened around him and he grunted as he thrust into you again and again and you rocked your hips against him, working your clit against his pubic bone, trying to take him as deep as possible with every forceful stroke. 

Your orgasm built fast, your cunt growing tighter and tighter around him until it became too much and you burst with it, all the heat inside you shooting out from your core and into the rest of you as your pussy pulsed around him. You cried out with it, not caring that you were exposed and in the QZ and that you were a FEDRA officer and he was a Firefly. All you cared about was him, how he was filling you, how he was making you feel more like yourself than you had since the world had ended more than a decade earlier. 

“Fuck, gonna come,” he managed, fucking you through your orgasm, his motions becoming harsher, more clumsy as his own climax drew closer. “Gonna fill you up so good, honey, fuck!” 

You didn’t have a chance to respond before you felt his orgasm take him, his cock shoved deep, the heavy throbs of his pleasure spilling into you hot and thick. You went limp in his arms as you took it, back against the brick, his head against your shoulder as he panted for breath and his orgasm started to ease. 

You stayed like that for a minute, his cock starting to soften inside you, the thud of your heart heavy in your ears. 

“Fuck,” he said again, not filled with passion but loaded with realization. He straightened, still a little breathless, and looked at you, cupping your cheek gently and still buried inside you. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have…” 

“It’s OK,” you said quickly, still a little breathless yourself. “My period is due any day now, it’s fine…” 

He nodded, still looking at you for a moment before slowly, gently, pulling himself from your body. He tucked himself away and adjusted your panties before making sure both of your feet were back on the ground and stepping back from you. 

“We shouldn’t do that again,” he said quietly, still watching you. “We… we shouldn’t see each other at all. Not now that I’m…” 

“A terrorist?” You asked, brows raised, remembering why you’d been mad at him just a few minutes earlier. 

“Fightin’ FEDRA,” he said. “I can’t… I can’t let you go down with me for this, honey. I can’t.” 

“And I’m, what, supposed to let you face this shit alone?” You asked. “I’m supposed to sit back and watch you get yourself killed?” 

He sighed and shook his head, picking his pack up from the ground before going to respond but you didn’t let him. 

“I’ll deal with the risk,” you snapped. “And we can keep our distance from each other but Tommy? I’m not letting you just get yourself killed. I’d appreciate if we worked together on that.” 

He looked at the ground and nodded slowly before meeting your eyes again. 

“Gotta promise me one thing,” he said. 

“What.” 

“Promise that if I tell you to get out or to stay away? You do it,” he said. You went to argue but he cut you off. “I mean it, honey. I’m not letting you get hurt for me. I can’t do that. I won’t.” 

You ground your teeth. 

“Fine,” you said eventually. 

He nodded again. 

“Good,” he said, turning to leave but stopping before he did. “Oh, I uh… I almost forgot…” 

He went into his pack and pulled out a small bundle of wildflowers, their cut stems wrapped in wet paper to keep them alive. 

“Saw these outside,” he said, holding them out. An offering. “Thought of you.” 

You took them, delicately tracing the soft petals. It was hard to believe there was something like this that still existed in the world, that it was still able to grow in the destruction you knew lay just outside the walls of the QZ. His hand found your elbow, holding you gently before pressing his lips to your cheek. 

“Take care of yourself, honey,” he said softly. 

You took a deep breath, still looking at the flowers, trying to keep the pinch of tears at the back of your throat from your voice. 

“You, too,” you said, looking up. But he was gone and you walked home with his come leaking from between your thighs and his flowers in your hands, hoping it wasn’t the last time you’d ever see him. 

It was a few months before you saw him again, when he sought you out because he knew that what he was doing was risky and he wanted to see if there was a way to do it under FEDRA’s nose. You helped him as best you could, both of you straining to keep an emotional and physical distance that felt almost panful now that you’d had a taste of what could be possible. But it worked, and the two of you figured out a new, tenuous structure to your relationship after that. You did your best to avoid what you both knew was right in front of you, what you both knew was impossible as long as you were a tool of the state and Tommy was fighting against it. But you couldn’t avoid him, seeking him out as often as you seemed to find a reason to, Tommy doing the same, always finding little reasons to touch each other, stand a little too close together, pass a cup of whiskey back and forth so it was almost like your lips were touching through the glass. 

Six months ago, though, Tommy had sought you out much like you had found him tonight, pulling you into an empty building as you walked home from a shift on guard, a job that was feeling worse and worse as the years wore on. 

His hand had clamped over your mouth to keep you from crying out when he grabbed you, pulling you back into his body. 

“Just me, GI Jane,” he said before you had a chance to really fight him. “You’re safe.” 

You jerked away from him all the same, peering out through a clouded window onto the dark street outside. You didn’t see anyone else. 

“Jesus, Miller, you trying to get yourself killed?” You snapped, adjusting your shirt from where it had gotten twisted against his body. 

“Sorry,” he said. “But I needed to talk to you.”

“And it couldn’t wait until our next meeting?” You asked, brows raised.

“Don’t know that I’ll still be here then,” he said and you froze, not even breathing. “The Fireflies… they’re sending me west.” 

“What?” You said quietly, watching him. 

“There’s a lab out that way,” he said. “They’re developing a cure, they want me to go help protect it.” 

“What? No,” you shook your head, heart racing. “No, you can’t, it’s too dangerous, it’s…” 

“S’why they need me to go, honey,” he said gently. “I’m pretty good at what I do, as it happens. They want my help out that way and, well… if I can be even a small part of fixin’ all this? I want to do it.” 

“Tommy…” 

“Come with me,” he said. You laughed but he shook his head. “I’m serious. Come.” 

“You want me, a FEDRA officer, to pick up and move across the country to be a Firefly,” you said, incredulous. “Sure, because they won’t just shoot me on sight when I show up at Boston HQ…” 

“I’ll vouch for you,” he said. “Come with me.” 

You sighed. 

“Tommy…” 

“It’s gotta be better than here,” he said. “Think about it, about what there could be for us out there. A place where we don’t gotta spend our days burning the dead or puttin’ people at gunpoint for breaking bullshit rules and…” 

“You really think there’s better than here out there?” You asked. “Look around, Tommy! The world ended, what, 15 years ago? And all that’s happened is more and more people get infected. More and more packs of raiders fighting to control shit. The closest thing we have to safety and the closest thing we have to a guarantee of making it to tomorrow is fucking FEDRA! You think I like this? That I like patrolling and arresting people and controlling shit like this? No! Of course I don’t! But I hear what it’s like out there and, what’s worse, I hear what it’s like in other QZs! There are executions and starvation and…” 

“You think we’re not headin’ that way here, too?” He demanded. “It’s not gonna get any better! Shit’s gonna get just as bad here and it won’t be long and I’m telling you… just come with me. I’ll take care of you, just… don’t ask me to leave you here. Please.” 

“Tommy…” 

“Please,” he said again, his voice cracking. “I can’t, I can’t just leave you here. I couldn’t do it, honey, I…” 

You cut him off before he said what you were afraid he was going to say. 

“I can’t watch you get yourself killed,” you said. “Don’t ask me to.” 

He sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“I’ll put off leaving as long as I can,” he said eventually. “But I’m telling you, we need to get out of here. We can’t stay here, not forever, not like this.” 

He walked you home, both of you keeping an eye out for anyone who might spot you together and make it a problem but it was quiet. When you got to your building, he looked around quickly and pulled you to him, holding your face and tilting you just so before kissing you, his lips soft, his skin warm. It was the first time you’d kissed since that day in the alley, a day that was years behind you but always so close in your mind.

“Tommy,” you breathed when he pulled back from you, his eyes searching yours. 

“I’m not leaving you here,” he said. “And if shit looks bad? Come find me. I’ll help you.” 

You watched him closely. 

“You, too,” you said and you felt his eyes on you until you were safely inside you apartment, your door locked behind you. 

His eyes were watching you like that now, all soft and open and concerned. 

“C’mon, honey,” he said again, coaxing. “You can talk to me.”

“I had to work an execution today,” you said, your voice cracking. “There were six people, Tommy. Six. All they did was break curfew a few too many times, because apparently that’s punishable by death now, and I had to stand there and make sure that no one stopped it and I can’t do this, I can’t support this, I…” 

“I’m sorry,” he said quietly, coming over and pulling you into his arms. He held you close, tucking your face into his shoulder and neck and you could smell the warm, comforting scent of him. Tommy had always been like that, like sunshine and fresh cut grass and wild flowers, like springtime made corporeal. “I’m so sorry, honey.” 

“This isn’t what I signed up for,” you said, choking up a little as you did. “When I joined, it was because it was this or doing who knows what to survive and they said this could help people. I wanted to help people, I didn’t want to kill them.” 

“I know,” he said, his voice velvet soft. “M’sorry.” 

You let him hold you for a while, soaking up the closeness with him that you knew you’d missed but hadn’t fully realized how much. Eventually, his hand stopped running the gentle path up and down your spine and came to cradle back of your head as he pulled back from you ever so slightly, his eyes searching yours. 

“I can’t keep being their soldier,” you whispered. “I can’t do it.” 

“You gonna let me help you, honey?” He asked gently. “Gonna let me get us out of here?” 

Your throat got tight, more tears tugging at you but you nodded, your eyes drifting to his mouth, to the soft plush of his lips below his mustache, your heart beating fast in the cage of your chest. You looked back to his eyes and saw your own feelings reflected in him, the want and care almost burning in his gaze. 

You kissed him then. You couldn’t seem to stop yourself, even if it wasn’t smart, even if you had so much more to figure out. He kissed you back, gentle at first but turning fierce and hungry quickly. But when you started tugging at his clothes, he stopped you, his large hands closing over your smaller ones to hold you still. You pulled back from him and frowned, concerned, but he didn’t give you a chance to ask. 

“We only did this once before and we didn’t get to do it right,” he said, his voice husky and his drawl thick. “Not makin’ that mistake again. Wanna take my time with you.” 

You just nodded and let him lead you to his bedroom. 

In another circumstance, you’d want to take a moment to appreciate that. The fact that you were here, with him, in his space with his things. You’d want to take a moment and see what he chose to surround himself with, to take in this part of him, too. But you weren’t able to focus enough on anything but Tommy enough to do that now and he didn’t give you much opportunity to. His mouth was on yours again quickly, unbuttoning your dark blue uniform shirt, pushing it down your shoulders and letting it fall to the floor. You looked down when it did, the fabric a pool on the ground, the patch with your last name embroidered on it all but glaring at you. Tommy gently took your chin and turned your head to face him. 

“Never have to put that on again,” he said quietly. “You’re not theirs. You’re mine.” 

You just nodded and kissed him again, undressing him as he finished undressing you in return. Soon, he was bare against you and you felt him in a way you never had before, the last time so hurried you didn’t even get the pleasure of his skin. But you did now as he walked you slowly, gently back toward the bed and lowered you onto the mattress. You watched him with wide eyes, taking the chance to actually see and appreciate him like this and he stroked his cock as he watched you in return. He tilted your chin toward him and kissed you before reaching down and spreading your legs, making your breath hitch. He knelt between your open thighs, trailing wet, lingering kisses down your chest and stomach as he did. 

“Gonna do this right,” he said, licking his fingers before gently, almost reverently, opening your sex to him. He groaned at the sight before lightly circling your clit with his thumb. “Gonna take real good care of you.” 

He leaned forward and kissed the top of your slit, wetly mouthing at your swollen clit. You moaned and that just made him more eager, licking and teasing at you as a finger circled your entrance before pushing slowly, firmly inside. He ate at you like that, licking and sucking and savoring and enjoying as he worked you with his thick finger and you couldn’t help but fall back on your elbows, back arching as he did. 

Your orgasm was building fast, everything in you going molten and hot, drawing tight and low inside yourself, everything he was doing putting you just on the edge of your climax but not quite close enough to reach it. 

“Fuck, Tommy,” you groaned, grinding your hips against his face, wanton and wild, your pussy not quite full enough to come. “Fuck, please, I…” 

“You need more?” He asked, pulling his mouth away from your slit and replacing his roving tongue with his thumb on your clit as his index finger continued to work you from the inside. “You need more than this to come?” 

You nodded frantically and he pulled his hand from you, making you groan. But he pushed you further up the bed, keeping your legs open and kneeling between them, his fingers finding your dripping heat again quickly. 

“Don’t want you goin’ without,” he said, panting and hungry, two fingers inside you now. “My girl needs more, I’ll give her more, give her everything.” 

He hooked his fingers inside into the soft, spongy parts of you that made you gasp and your body tense, just on the edge of your orgasm, teetering at the edge. At the last second, he took his hand back again but, before you had a chance to protest, his cock was filling you deep and hard, making your back arch as his thumb found your clit again, working you in firm circles as your body stretched to take him. 

“That what you needed?” He asked, grinding himself deep inside. “That little pussy all nice and full of me now?” 

“Fuck!” You cried out, your orgasm all but slamming into you, your muscles throbbing so hard it almost hurt, your cunt straining to hold his thick length inside as you came around him. 

“Goddamn,” Tommy groaned, his cock buried in you to the hilt, pulling back ever so slightly before thrusting back in so hard it was like he was trying to disappear into you. “That’s it honey, you come for me, you make a mess of this fucking cock.” 

He didn’t wait for your orgasm to fully ease before he started fucking you, really fucking you. His hands found the soft flesh of your inner thighs, spreading you open as far as he could, his fingers sinking into you there as his length found every part of you inside. Every movement stretched you, more than anyone else you’d ever taken before, but you wanted it so bad it wasn’t painful, just overwhelming in the best way. You wanted your body to shift to take him, to shape itself to hold him the way you so desperately needed to. He was inside you, over you, the smell of him on his sheets - all warm and wild - around you. You wanted to take him into yourself and have him take you, to bind yourself to him in a way that was fierce and inextricable. 

Your body wanted it, too, your slick dripping down your thighs and his, your cunt growing tighter and tighter around him, this orgasm taking hold faster and stronger than your first. 

His hands ran over your thighs toward your center, his thumbs stroking your lips, finding your clit and toying with you for a moment before taking your hips and adjusting you so that your sensitive nub was pressed against him, making you groan. His hands ran up your sides, over your stomach and waist, cupping your breasts before he folded himself over you, his bare skin pressing against yours as he kissed you. You whimpered at the feel of him, so soft but firm, warm silk drawn tight over the muscular structure of him. He took your mouth the way he took your pussy, firm and desperate and commanding, his tongue twisting with yours like he was trying to occupy every part of you he could reach and driving your pussy even tighter. 

“Not gonna last long, you grippin’ me like that,” he panted, his pace not slowing as he kept fucking into you. “S’it OK if I come inside you? Fuck, honey, I need to come inside you.” 

“I’m not…” you closed your eyes, having a hard time focusing, a moan pulled from you as his cock hit just the right place inside you. “Fuck… I’m not on anything, you might…” 

That just seemed to make him fuck you harder, his body pressing yours deeper into the mattress. When you opened your eyes again, you found him looking back at you, gaze hungry and open and, in that moment, you didn’t care what happened next. Like the apocalypse didn’t exist, like you hadn’t spent the last decade and a half living through hell, like it was just you and Tommy and wherever this led, it led and it would be OK because you’d be together. 

“Come inside me,” you whispered, eyes on his, your body moving to meet his on every aching stroke. “Fuck, please, please come inside me.” 

He kissed you again, the tangle of your tongues and teeth wet and messy, your legs coming up to bracket his hips as he drove himself into you harder and faster and you arched into him. Your orgasm was so close you were buzzing with it, not able to hear anything but his heavy breaths and your own blood in your ears, but you wanted to come with him, wanted to fall apart to the feeling of him leaving part of himself behind in you. 

Then, he thrust deep and hard, holding himself there against that soft and tender part of you and you felt the heavy pulse of him inside as he moaned into your mouth. The throb of his come spilling against the most intimate part of you setting off your own orgasm, your pussy fluttering over him, pulling every ounce of his come from his body into your own until both of you went limp, his heady weight enveloping you. He buried his face in your neck, his breath hot on your skin as the two of you panted for breath and your hands trembled as they drifted over his back, trailing up and down his spine. 

Tommy pressed his lips into your shoulder, your throat, your jaw, his nose nuzzling into your cheek as he pulled himself from your body before he left for a minute, returning with a damp washcloth. He climbed between your legs and groaned, his thumb tracing your slit. 

“I’m leakin’ out of you,” he said, his voice low and gruff. “Goddamn, love seeing you full of me.” 

He pushed his come back into your still slightly gaping hole and you moaned. 

“Sorry this ain’t warm,” he said before pressing the washcloth to your skin and cleaning you gently. “Water heater died about two years back.” 

You laughed a little. 

“Can’t remember the last time I had a hot shower,” you said as he dropped the washcloth somewhere to the side of the bed and lay beside you, propping himself up on his elbow to look down at you as he trailed his long, thick fingers gently over your stomach. “God I miss those.” 

He smiled, a little sadly. 

“Lot I miss about before,” he said. “S’why I’m trying to hard to get that back.” 

You watched him in the dim glow through the window of the streetlights outside. He was so beautiful, something soft and hopeful about him, something so lovely and wonderfully human that you weren’t sure existed in many people anymore. 

“Do you think they can?” You asked quietly. 

He shrugged. 

“I’m not smart enough to say,” he said. “But… I do know that if I don’t try? I can’t live with myself. I need to do everything I can to try to fix this because if I don’t, why am I here? If it’s not to make shit better for…” he took a deep breath, his eyes running over your body as he did. “For you… then what the hell am I doin’?” 

“Do you think the Fireflies will let me come with you?” You asked quietly. “Or how long it’ll be before we can leave if they do?” 

“They’ll let you,” he said. “Already talked to Marlene, told her all you did to keep me alive over the years. Plus, with your knowledge of how FEDRA works from the inside? You can keep helping us, even if you’re not still on the inside. And… I told her I wasn’t goin’ if you couldn’t go, too.” 

You shoved him lightly and he laughed, leaning down to kiss the tip of your nose. 

“We can leave in a few days,” he said. “We got a group headin’ that way at the end of the week that we can travel with. You can just lie low here until we do.” 

“You were leaving that soon?” You asked, heart cracking open a little at just how close you’d come to losing him without even realizing it. 

“No,” he shrugged. You frowned, confused, and he sighed. “I told you, they want me out there, I could have gone with whatever group I wanted but I wasn’t about to leave without you. I’ve just been waitin’ for my girl.” 

You smiled in spite of yourself. 

“Your girl, huh?” You teased. 

“My girl,” he smiled. “And me and my girl are gonna go save the world.” 

You moved closer to him, to that warmth he seemed to radiate that touched every part of you, kissing his bare chest as you did. 

“Yeah,” you said, that warmth taking root in your chest and blossoming into something like hope. “We are.” 

[2chopsticks2eyes]

Obsession

2chopsticks2eyes - Masterlist

Pairing:

Bang Chan x Fem Reader

Hwang Hyunjin x Fem Reader

Themes: Smut, Pining

Word Count: ~6k | AO3

Warnings: Smut, Explicit Sexual Content, Cussing, Oral Sex, Hand Jobs, Vaginal Fingering, Blow Jobs, Vaginal Sex, Cum Eating, Pining, Protected Sex, Ambiguous/Open Ending

Summary: You find out that this new guy you are going to start dating, Chris, is your best friend's new roommate. You are excited, but your best friend, Hyunjin (who may or may not be madly in love with you) is not so thrilled. Chris notices this and the two men settle on some sort of... agreement.

Author's Note: This work was inspired by a request from @stayandot8. I think this might be the shortest fic I've written, but I promise I put my heart into it! 💖 Proofread was only skimmed over so I hope it isn't trash. 🙃

__________________________________________

Hyunjin had been your best friend for what felt like ages. However, in reality, you two only met a couple of years ago when you started teaching with him at an art studio. You bonded with him over your shared affinity with fine arts and it was the most natural friendship you had ever experienced. You were just simply comfortable with one another.

Some might say a bit too comfortable. At least for a friendship between a boy and a girl.

Since you were co-workers, you spent most of your time with the man. You would have your meals with him, spent your days off with him, and even spent some nights at each other’s places if one of you was too lazy to go home for the night.

You don’t think that there was anything you wouldn’t be comfortable with around him. That’s what lead you to ask him to come shopping with you for your new date.

“How long have you even been talking to this guy?” He said as he stole your coffee from your hands while you strolled through the outlet mall, looking for a place to shop. He emptied the contents of the drink and tossed it into a nearby garbage bin.

“Just a few weeks, but we really clicked on Tinder and he agreed that he wasn’t just looking for a quick fuck.” You glanced in one of the windows of a shop and decided against it, continuing your walk with your bestie.

“And you’re sure he’s not some creep?” He glanced at you speculatively.

“I’m sure, you worry wart. Plus, if he is you know I can handle myself.” You bumped elbows with him and he rolled his eyes.

“Okay, okay fine. Just wanna look out for my girl.” He winked down at you and you scoffed. Always the biggest flirt, this guy. “What’s this guy’s name again? I think I tuned you out when you said it before.” He said nonchalantly.

“Yah!” You weakly smacked him on the arm, making him dramatically hold onto it as if you had shot him. “It’s Bang Chan, you pabo!” He immediately halted in his tracks, making you stop as well to raise an eyebrow at him. “Jin? Did you malfunction?” You shook his arm with a chuckle.

He stared down at you in disbelief. “Did you say Bang Chan?” He sounded as if you just told him that you were the Queen of England and you giggled.

“Uhhh yeah? He also goes by Chris. Why? Wait–” Your tone quickly changed into one of exasperation. “Hyunjin, please don’t tell me you went to a fortune teller again. Did they ward you away from any ‘Bang’ family names or something? I told you to stop going after what happened last time!” You scolded, memory flashing back to when he only wore white 24/7 because it was ‘guaranteed to bring him great wealth’. You had to help him with his laundry for weeks because he couldn’t stop getting stains on everything he wore.

“No, no, no. What does this guy look like?” He looked almost panicked now and you started to become concerned.

“Ummm, well… He’s a bit shorter than you. Super muscular with broad shoulders. A super bright smile and dimples that I just want to swim in…” You started to sound wistful as you described the dreamy beefcake. “Oh and don’t even get me started on his di–”

“Oh god, Aegiya, STOP.” The man sounded disgusted and you doubled over laughing. You were only a year younger than him and he just had to milk it by always calling you a baby.

“Dude, what’s the deal?” You finally wondered.

He huffed and continued walking, annoyance written all over his features as he stared straight forward. “Well, apparently it appears that your new boy toy also happens to be the new roommate I got last week…” He grumbled and now it was time for you to stop in your tracks.

“What??” To say the least, you were pretty surprised.

He just continued to walk and you scurried over to catch up to him. “Yyyyep. Congrats. I now get to help you plan for your date with my fucking roommate.” He sounded super put out and you cackled at him.

“Are you fucking kidding me?! That’s fucking hilarious!” After a moment of your chortling, your brain cut you off short when you felt a lightbulb blink to life. “Oh my god, Jinnie! You have to tell me about him! Do you think he’s into more of a wild girl, or a shy one? Does he cook? Clean? What kind of music does he–”

“Hey little lady, you probably know more about him than I do. Like I said, he just recently moved in.” You gave him puppy dog eyes and he glanced over at you momentarily, quickly looking straight forward again with a disbelieving huff. “All I can tell you is that he produces music, he constantly works on it day in and day out as if his life depends on it. I’m surprised he even found the time to date.”

You smiled to yourself. He made time for me? As if fate had heard your conversation, the two of you started getting nearer to the perfect store. “Let’s go in here, Jinnie!” You grabbed his arm to pull him in, but he was as firm as a statue.

“Nuh-uh. Nooo way am I going into a sex shop with you to help you bone my fucking roommate. You’re nuts.” He looked at you as if you had grown two heads.

“Awww c’mon, Jinnie, pleeease? I need the male objective’s eye! I don’t want to go in alone!” You grabbed onto his hand and looped your fingers to intertwine with his. “Please…” You donned your cutest pout and squeezed his hand.

His brows furrowed and he looked like he was having a genuine internal battle. “Damnit, Aegiya…” He closed his eyes and sighed deeply. “You’d better make this quick. AND you owe me a shit ton of ice cream after this…”

A smile burst out across your face and you threw your arms around his shoulders, giggling like a school girl. “Ahhh! Thankyouthankyouthankyou, Jinnie! This is why I love you!” When you pulled back from the embrace, he looked annoyed, but you could definitely see a rosy color dusted across his cheeks and a deep red bloom on the tips of his ears.

You intertwined fingers again and dragged him into the store.

You felt like a kid in a candy store, finding set after set of lingerie and handing it to Hyunjin to hold onto. “Okay, I think we’ve accumulated enough, little Miss Pamela Anderson!” He shouted at you from behind the pile he had stacked in his arms.

You giggled at his drowning appearance and led him to the changing rooms where you sat him down on the bench just outside the door. “Wait here, I’m gonna try them on!” You grabbed the first set from his arms and skipped off to try it on.

You struggled a bit on the first one just because it was so intricate, but you ended up figuring it out. It had crossed your mind that it might feel a bit weird for some girls to show their male best friend themselves wearing lingerie, but, again, you were just so comfortable with Hyunjin that you didn’t think twice.

“Jin, I think this might be a bit much, what do you think?” You said as you opened the door to show him.

At first, he wasn’t really paying attention, just mindlessly scrolling away on his phone. However, when he looked up, the phone clattered to the ground, which he quickly retrieved while clearing his throat for some reason. “Uh– I– Um, it looks– uh… good? I guess?” He said, desperately avoiding eye contact with you.

“Yeah, but look–” You turned around to show him the backside that looked like a damned jungle of straps, buckles, and latches. “Doesn’t this seem too complicated?” When you looked at him again, his whole head and neck were a deep crimson as he zoned out on your ass. “Jinnie?”

He quickly snapped out of it and his eyes darted anywhere and everywhere away from you. “U-Uh yeah– y-yeah…” 

You figured you didn’t want it to be too hard to get out of because that’s just not sexy if you have to struggle in the moment. You just shrugged. “Okay, then. Next!” You grabbed the next piece off the pile and shut yourself back into the changing room.

You repeated this several times, you put on the next set after the next set, continuing to ask Hyunjin for his input until you slipped on the final piece.

It was perfect. A completely black (which you knew Chris liked) bustier with mesh, lace fabric woven over the spines of the top. Complete with a garter belt and crotchless panties. All you needed were some stockings and it would be perfect.

However, you obviously couldn’t show these to Hyunjin, they were crotchless! And contrary to popular belief, you did have some standards. Anyway, you knew it was perfect with or without his opinion.

You quickly changed back into your clothes and stepped out, items in hand and ready to be purchased. “This is the one! Ready to go?”

Instead of a grumble with a remark like ‘finally’ or something equally as chafing coming from his mouth, you were surprised to hear him say– “What? That’s it? But you didn’t…” He stopped mid-sentence and blushed.

“I couldn’t show you this one, Jin. It was a bit much, even for you. But, trust me, you would have loved it.” You said enthusiastically as you walked to the checkout counter.

He just simply replied with– “Oh… okay…” And was suspiciously silent for the rest of the day.

- - - - - - - - - - 

Jinnie 🥟🍦:

Ur date is tonight right?

Aegiya ❣🎨:

?Yeah, why

?Omg did he say something

?Did he ask u abt me

?He’s not calling it off is he

As much as Hyunjin wanted to lie and say yes, he wouldn’t do that to you.

Jinnie 🥟🍦:

No no, I was just checking

Was thinking about going out tonight too

(He wasn’t)

Jinnie 🥟🍦:

Ya know, give u guys privacy

Aegiya ❣🎨:

Ur such a sweetheart, Jinnie

But I don’t want to kick u out of ur own home

We will probably go back to my place anyway

The thought gave Hyunjin a knot in the back of his throat.

Jinnie 🥟🍦:

Oh ok cool

Have fun

(He hoped you wouldn’t)

Aegiya ❣🎨:

😉 Will do

He grumbled at his phone and flopped onto his back on the bed. Ever since he met you, he knew you were special. However, since you were coworkers, apparently that meant he had a big ole ‘FRIENDZONE’ stamped on his forehead in red and he would never make it any further than #besties.

But it was fine. He was just happy to have you in his life because you were, in fact, a really cool person.

You had dated a few people here and there in the years since you two became friends and he obviously wasn’t a fan, but he was happy any time you were happy, so he stayed silent.

However, when he found out that you were going to date his freshly new roommate, he started to get a bit more agitated. What if you two really hit it off? Yes, you would be around a lot, but would you still come around for him? Or would you only want to come to see Chris? Not to mention the fact that he would have to listen to the man fucking you just down the hall!

…

Okay, maybe the idea of being within such proximity to you while you were moaning and whining and getting fucked silly might be a turn-on… even if it wasn’t him making you feel that way…

Ever since you took him shopping, it was like his horniness was amplified by ten and his mind was on a constant loop of images of you in that lingerie. Whatever caused you to feel the need to model them to Hyunjin, he didn’t know, but now the godforsaken thoughts plagued him day and night! 

Sometimes he even got a little pissed, thinking you were just stringing him along to tease him, but he would quickly come to his senses because in his heart he knew that you loved him. Even if it was just as a friend.

A knock on Hyunjin’s door disturbed him from his thoughts. Of course, the man of the hour would show up right in the middle of his very important brooding session. “Come in!” He shouted to his roommate.

The door opened and he was greeted with the bright smile of that damned Aussie. Hyunjin couldn’t even hate him and that pissed him off even more. Chris was just such a genuinely good guy. He could literally befriend anyone he wanted and he was super talented too. Hyunjin never had any self-esteem issues, he knew he was gorgeous, but the fact that Chris was the one to snatch you kind of hurt his pride.

“Hey, roomie! Whatcha doin?” He plopped down next to the younger on his bed.

“Just thinking of where I should go tonight. I’m not really interested in hearing…” The words were left unsaid, but Chris understood right away. 

Chris was pretty surprised when you told him that Hyunjin was your best friend, but he was also kind of happy that you were already so tight with his new roommate.

Although, when Chris talked to Hyunjin about the topic, he noticed that the taller man became a bit sullen any time your name was brought up. Chris could instantly tell that Hyunjin was in love with you.

He thought he should have maybe been pissed or concerned, but he wasn’t. He moreso felt sympathy for the young man. Yes, Chris was also incredibly smitten with you, but that only made him feel more sorry for the younger. Because he knew the effect you had on both of them.

He placed a gentle hand on Hyunjin’s shoulder. “Hey, man, listen,” Chris said apologetically. “Don’t think I haven’t noticed that you like her. I’m not blind.”

Hyunjin shot up into a seated position. “W-what are you talking about? I’m not into her like that at all!” He himself knew he didn’t sound believable. “We’re just friends…”

Chris just sighed. “Okay, sure, but the statement still stands. You don’t have to leave our place on account of me. Me and her can go back to her place after.” Chris gnawed on his lip as if he was contemplating something and Hyunjin was intrigued. “Or…” He rubbed the back of his neck nervously. “We could still come over with you here…”

Hyunjin couldn’t lie to himself, he always wanted to hear what you would sound like in bed, but it just felt… wrong? “I dunno hyung… I don’t want to spoil your guys’ date.” Although it pained him to say it.

“Well that’s the thing, I don’t think you would.” Chris countered and Hyunjin just looked at him quizzically. “Okay, let me explain. So she told you we met on Tinder, right?” Hyunjin slowly nodded, not sure where he was going with this. “Well, we really started off talking about our… sexual preferences–” Hyunjin was certainly intrigued now. “And she had mentioned once that she always wanted to try a threesome…”

Hyunjin’s jaw dropped. “Oh…” He didn’t know what else to say. Where was Chris heading with this?

“Take it however you like, but just know that if you just so happened to be home and just so happened to walk in on us… I don’t think she would be opposed to some… company… if you get what I mean.” Chris hinted and Hyunjin was frozen on the spot.

“And you want that??” Hyunjin was flabbergasted.

Chris chuckled. “I mean, I know what it’s like to be friendzoned by a girl and I also know what it’s like to have bad blood between roommates. And I don’t want either of those things, so why not let her decide?” Chris was genuinely too good to be true. “And don’t think I don’t want her to myself, because, trust me, I do. But you are an important part of her life. It’s best that she knows how you feel before things get too serious.”

Hyunjin didn’t even know how to respond. Hell, he didn’t know how to think in that exact moment. All he could register was the word that came from his mouth. “Okay…”

- - - - - - - - - - 

Chris was a perfect gentleman, through and through. The dinner he took you to was delicious beyond reason and the conversations he led were the most engaging that you had ever experienced. Everything just felt so easy with him. Plus, the chemistry between the two of you was off the charts.

Small touches and lingering hands left you buzzing with need and you found yourself having a hard time keeping your hands to yourself. The only odd thing, not unwelcome, just odd, was the fact that he kept bringing up the topic of your best friend the whole night.

He wanted your opinion of him and what you thought of him. Some people might have thought it was out of jealousy, but he didn’t really give off the jealous vibe. He seemed to genuinely want to know what your relationship was like. And you loved your best friend, so you were happy enough to discuss him.

By the end of dinner, the sexual tension was suffocating and you just wanted to rip his clothes off then and there. When you hopped into the car and he started driving, you felt yourself shaking with anticipation when he rested his hand on your bare thigh where your little black dress was too short to cover.

You were super impatient to get back to your place, but as he kept driving, you realized he wasn’t heading in the direction of your apartment where he picked you up. “Hey Chris, do you know the way back to my place?” You turned to look at him to find him blushing. God, he’s cute.

He cleared his throat. “Well, I um… I was wondering if I could take you back to mine? I’m sorry it was a bit presumptuous of me, but I have a surprise for you…”

Electricity shot through you and you didn’t think twice to consider what you told Hyunjin. “Not presumptuous at all! I’m…” You blushed when he glanced at you with his stupidly sexy half-grin. “...looking forward to it.” Your eyes were glued to his face and you squeezed your thighs in arousal when he slid his hand a bit further up your thigh.

He looked over at you just as you bit your lip, your eyes hazy with lust. He bit his own lip to suppress a smile when he looked back at the road and you felt his hand slide to your inner thigh as his fingers closed in on your crotchless panties. Never touching, just teasing.

- - - - - - - - - - 

When you arrived at his and Hyunjin’s apartment, everything happened in a blur. As the front door closed behind you, you felt Chris’ hands wrap around your waist from behind and a warm press of lips close in on your neck. 

Chris was intoxicating, everything about him made you dizzy with want and you quickly spun around in his arms, throwing your arms around his neck and smashing into his lips with your own. He instantly pressed you up against the wall and you arched up into him, silently begging for more. His arms were wrapped low around your waist to pull you suffocatingly close and you kicked your black heels off when you wrapped your legs around his waist.

He responded by holding you up underneath your dress by both ass cheeks and he pressed his slowly hardening dick against you as he moved to devour your neck. He grinded into you and you threw your head back as far as the wall would allow you as you moaned his name.

“Fuck, you’re so gorgeous.” He growled into your neck as he kneaded your ass with his fingertips. 

All you could reply with was– “Ngh, fuck, Chris. More. I need more...” Your voice was whiny and already fucked out, but by the low groan he breathed into your neck, he was very much in a similar state.

He pulled you back from the wall and carried you down the hall to his bedroom where he eagerly plopped both of you down on the bed. You writhed underneath him, trying to pull him impossibly closer as he moved to grope your breasts over your dress. You whined and pleaded for more and he complied.

He released one of your breasts and slid his hand down between your legs. What he felt (or really the lack of what he felt) made him gasp and look down at you incredulously. The crotchless panties were definitely a good choice. “Fuck…” He pounced on you with one long, hungry kiss and then released you to crawl down between your legs. 

The moment you felt his mouth close around your clit, you saw stars. You cried out with labored breaths and it took him no time at all to push you over the edge. You curled your fingers in his dark brown locks and he guided you through your orgasm, head popping up with a breathtaking smile when you came down. “Holy shit, Chris… that was probably the fastest anyone has ever got me to cum.” You giggled and you internally cooed when he blushed at the statement.

However, that was short-lived as the sex-god side of Chris returned and he ripped off his shirt and slacks, leaving him in just his boxers as he nestled back down to sit against the headboard. “C’mere, baby girl.” He patted his lap and you quickly crawled over to straddle him. His hands instantly flew to your hips and ass where your dress rode up.

Now was the moment you had been waiting for. You decided to cut to the chase and you grabbed the hem of your dress and slowly pulled it up over your head. When the fabric that was blinding you was finally pulled from your face, Chris’ expression was almost humorous. You felt his fingers gradually tighten more and more on your ass as he assessed your undergarments.

His face looked like he was in some sort of trance of crazed hunger and when he looked back into your eyes, you saw pure carnal desire. “What do you think? I got it just for you, Chris.” You said with hooded eyelids that ate up every inch of skin he had on display.

“What do I think?” His voice must have dropped about ten octaves and he harshly pulled you to directly sit on his achingly hard cock through his boxers. “I think you're a motherfucking goddess.”

He then proceeded to capture your lips once more in an absolutely filthy kiss, tongues clashing and teeth gnawing. You started grinding on his dick and he growled into your mouth, pulling away moments after you started.

“Do you want your surprise, baby girl?” He said as he guided your grinding hips with his hands. You were so fucked out that all you could do was nod your head profusely. He then turned to look at the door you had left open behind you. “Hyunjin-ah, would you like to come in?”

You immediately stilled and whipped your head around. You felt the hands on your hips tighten. “Jinnie?!” You were shocked. How long had he been watching??? By the completely beet-red face and the huge bulge in his pants, you would say it had been more than just a few moments.

You heard a shushing from the man underneath you and you turned back to him. He looked deep into your eyes and you felt him slowly glide his thumb over your sopping clit, making you gasp and your eyelids flutter. “I asked Hyunjinnie to help bring your fantasy to life.” You instantly knew he was talking about the threesome you had hinted at one time. “And he was more than willing to help out.”

You slowly turned back to your best friend that had taken a few steps further into the room. “Is that true, Jinnie?” You were mostly worried about his own comfort. 

He nodded with a hazy stare. “It’s not exactly how I pictured it happening… but yeah…” What did he mean by that? 

You didn’t have much time to think on it, however, because you suddenly felt Chris easing a finger inside you. You gasped and whipped back around to face him, your hands flying to his broad shoulders to ground yourself. 

“Do you mind if he watches while I fuck your pretty little hole first?” Your mouth was perpetually hung open as you nodded in compliance. “Good girl, now get on all fours, gorgeous.” He pulled his finger out of you and, before you did as you were told, you grabbed Chris’ hand and took his spunk-covered finger into your mouth. Both men groaned at the sight and you weren't ashamed to admit that you were feeling pretty proud of yourself. 

Once you released his digit and you turned to do what you were commanded to, you looked straight into Hyunjin’s eyes and crawled to where he was standing at the foot of the bed. Without warning, you grabbed him by his belt loops and pulled him flush to you where you stood on your knees on the bed. You could feel his erection push into your stomach and you felt a new wave of arousal stir in your core.

“We can talk about this later, but right now, I want this…” You deftly undid the top button of his shirt. “...and these…” You moved a hand down and palmed at his hard-on, making him gasp, then popped open the button on his jeans as well. You stretched up and brought his head down so you could whisper in his ear. “...gone.”

When you released him with a wicked smile and resumed your position on all fours like you were asked, Hyunjin quickly got to work on your request.

You suddenly felt a hand gently wrap around your neck to pull you up and back flush against Chris, his now bare cock resting between the cleft of your ass cheeks. “You think you can take all of me, sweetie?” He said as he grabbed your wrist with his free hand and lead you to feel his sizable dick. You almost choked on your gasp. Now, you knew Chris had a huge cock, you both had sent each other plenty of nudes these past weeks, but to feel it in your hand, it just didn’t feel real.

You tried to turn to look at it, but his hand on your neck kept you still and you whimpered. “Now, you have some options, baby girl. Either you take all of me now without seeing it first–” To be honest, that sounded pretty hot, but you were also dying to take a peek. “...OR, you can look all you want, but I’ll get off in that sweet mouth of yours instead while Hyunjinnie does whatever he wants with your tasty little cunt.”

You couldn’t control the pornographic moan that escaped your lips from the pure filth coming from his lips. You could see Hyunjin start to form a slight grin from watching this unfold and that in itself had you shaking with want. “B-but what if I want both?”

You could feel the rumble against your back coming from the depths of Chris’ chest from the question. “A greedy little one, are we?” You then felt yourself abruptly being pushed face-first into the mattress with your ass in the air. “Then I guess we’ll just have to give you all we’ve got…” Chris growled as you heard the tear of a condom wrapper open.

“J-just–!” You looked up at Hyunjin, as best as you could from your squished position, from his rushed outburst. “Just… don’t hurt her…” He sounded a bit hesitant to say it, but he looked down into your eyes with pure concern. Your heart soared.

“Jinnie…” You held up your hand and he crouched down next to your face. You crooked your neck up to whisper directly into his ear, loud enough for Chris to hear. “I want you to hurt me…”

He pulled back incredulously and his shocked eyes bore into yours. “Holy fuck, can you be any more perfect?”

“I know, right?” Chris said with a chuckle.

Everything that happened next all happened simultaneously. You felt Chris shimmying behind you and felt his warm breath fan over your folds. You felt him lick a long, fat stripe up your opening then felt him shimmy again to get into position. You felt the tip of his cock wedge its way into your entrance and you saw Hyunjin step back and finally drop his boxers to the floor.

Your. Jaw. Dropped.

Not only from the breathtaking feeling of Chris’ dick splitting you in two, but also at the mesmerizing sight of Hwang Hyunjin stripped bare with his beautiful, leaking cock in his hand. “Like what you see, Aegiya?” All you could do was nod dumbly with a red face that was struggling to adjust to Chris’ size.

You needed a distraction from the pain. You pulled yourself up on your hands and reached out to Hyunjin. “Wanna taste…” You whined pitifully.

He cockily smirked with his tongue prodding at his lip. “Anytime, baby.” You felt fire in your veins from his words and you felt in desperate need for more stimulation.

Just as you grabbed ahold of Hyunjin’s gorgeous cock, you pushed your ass back into Chris, shoving him even deeper inside you and the three of you moaned simultaneously.

You quickly started lapping up all of the precum that coated Hyunjin’s tip and he slowly tangled his hands in your hair. “You taste so good, Jinnie.” You said with fluttered lashes, right before you took his head all the way in.

“Fuck, Aegiya. You have no idea how long I’ve been waiting for this…” That one statement blew your mind and you instantly looked back on your entire relationship. Hyunjin wanted me?

Again, you couldn’t think on it long, because Chris suddenly decided to start pistoning fast and hard into you, shoving you down onto Hyunjin’s cock even further. You held back your gag reflex and allowed yourself to bask in the eroticism of being used by these fucking drop-dead gorgeous men.

“Goddamn, baby girl. You’re doing so *ngh* fucking good for us *huff* …taking all this cock so fucking well.” Chris growled as he nailed you over and over again in all the right places. 

“Shit, Aegi. You’re so fucking sexy with your mouth around me *hiss* fuuuck you’re so damn good at that!” Hyunjin threw his head back with a laugh and it was one of the most beautiful sights you had ever seen. “I can’t wait to taste you, baby.”

That’s what threw you over the edge, screaming as loud as you were able to with a throat full of cock. They both seemed to slow down as you rode your orgasm, but they were definitely not done with you yet.

Once you seemed to have come down from your high, Hyunjin spoke up. “Hyung…” There seemed to be some sort of silent communication going on because before you knew it, you were completely empty on both ends.

You slumped down on the mattress, your intense orgasm seemingly having taken the life out of you. Your eyes fluttered shut while you tried to regain control of your breathing and you felt someone sweetly petting your hair. “Did we wear you out for the night? Sorry, Aegiya…” Your eyes snapped open to see Hyunjin knelt down next to your head at the foot of the bed.

“N-no!” You grabbed onto his hand, pleadingly. “Not done! Need more… use me…” You were suddenly too cockdumb to form complete sentences, but what you did say made both men curse in tandem. Hyunjin smirked and quickly stood up.

The men grabbed each end of you and flipped you onto your back. Your vision was blurry with lust, but you could still clearly see that Chris had removed his condom and Hyunjin donned one now instead.

With one sharp tug, Hyunjin pulled you into position where his face hovered over your folds. You looked down at him right as he placed those plump lips against your throbbing clit in a torturous kiss. You whined at the damned tease and he smiled against your skin. 

He then went from zero to sixty in the blink of an eye.

He began to you out as if his life depended on it and his long tongue reached even further inside you than you thought was possible. Your head craned back as you belted out a silent cry of pleasure. However, Chris used your open mouth to his advantage as he positioned himself at the foot of the bed and you finally caught a glimpse of his dick coming straight toward your mouth.

And HOLY FUCK was the man packing, or what?

There was no way in hell you were going to be able to deepthroat that monster! Yet you took him in your mouth nonetheless. You knew you still had a wicked tongue when it came to giving head. “Shit, baby girl. Your mouth really is magic.” Chris groaned.

You felt pride fill your smug little bubble, but you were soon preoccupied with your next orgasm rapidly approaching from the skilled tongue of Hyunjin. You whimpered on Chris’ massive cock and he moaned from the vibrations. Your orgasm was just as powerful as the last as you released all over your best friend’s face.

You heard a long hum come from the man between your legs. “You taste so good, Aegiya.” Hyunjin said once you were finished and he kissed his way up your body, only to stop to suck each nipple at a time into his mouth. Chris had started fucking your face shallowly and he was able to get painfully deep from this position. 

As you felt Hyunjin move up to suck on your neck, you felt his cock start to prod at your entrance. You were more eager than you thought you should be to feel him inside you, but when he absolutely slammed into you, you almost choked. Hyunjin was waaay longer than Chris and he reached spots inside you that no man had ever reached before.

You whimpered on Chris’ cock and you felt him start to stutter in his rhythm. “Fuck… M’cummin…” Sure enough, after a few more pumps, you felt hot ropes of his seed hit the back of your throat. You always had this really sick pleasure of cum eating and he thankfully spared you none.

More and more kept coming, and just when you didn’t think you could fit anymore, he finally finished and pulled out. You closed your eyes and hummed in bliss, sloshing the thick fluid around in your mouth before savoring every gulp to emptiness. You had realized that Hyunjin had stopped moving and you opened your eyes, offended that he would rob you of that delicious sensation he was giving you.

Yet when you opened your eyes, you found both men staring at you with shock on their faces. “Fuck, that’s gotta be the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen…” Chris said with heavy breaths as he, too, was coming down from his high.

“Nasty, baby.” Hyunjin said with a smirk as he lowered himself down to hover just above your face. He looked apprehensive for a moment, seemingly searching your eyes as he slowly rocked into you with a steady rhythm and quick glances at your panting lips.

You decided to cut to the chase and you wrapped all your limbs around him, crashing him fully down onto your body and connecting your moistened lips. 

Well shit. Why did he have to be an amazing kisser too?

His pace picked up along with the hunger in his kiss and you were suddenly overwhelmed with the feeling of having your best friend fuck you senseless.

Although Hyunjin’s dick was beating your cervix to a pulp, the pain led you to yet another climax that you didn’t even think was possible. He pulled back and brought his hand up to thumb at your lips. “Get this wet for me, pretty?” You instantly sucked his finger in and his heavy-breathing, open mouth formed the sexiest fucking smile you had seen on him yet.

He retrieved the dripping digit and brought it down to your over-sensitive clit, almost instantly pushing you over the edge. Without further ado, Hyunjin also climaxed and he came with your name on his lips. Holy shit, you just fucked your best friend…

Things were hazy after he pulled out. 

First, you felt two pairs of hands strip you out of the uncomfortable lingerie and begin to wipe you down.

Next, you were easily repositioned under the covers to rest your head on a comfy pillow with the softest sheets you had ever felt. 

After that, things got quiet. You didn’t know why… but you suddenly felt… lonely.

You felt a kiss on your forehead and that’s when you forced your eyes open. You caught his hand as the man started to retreat. “Jinnie?” He returned to you with a sad smile.

“Yes? What is it, Aegiya?” You squeezed his hand tighter.

“Stay? Please?” He looked startled and he glanced at the man that had evidently crawled under the covers with you. You turned to Chris’ confused face and looped your other arm around his strong bicep. “Both of you?” You knew this would probably be weird in normal circumstances and you would have to address your feelings in the morning, but right now you just wanted to snuggle up to both of the men you adore inside and out. And, thankfully, they seemed to agree.

The rest is tomorrow’s problem.

__________________________________________

If you've made it this far, thank you so much for reading!

This one is a spicy match!! Tbh I have no clue if I would be able to choose between the two... 😳

Please like, follow, and share! Thanks baby stays! 😘

2chopsticks2eyes - Masterlist

[tangerinesilk]

－ I CAN SEE YOU : TANGERINE X FEM!READER

tangerine is going on a solo mission… well, at least he thinks he is. with lemon missing by his side, he’s left with one other option that is supposed to make his job easier. unfortunately for him, you’re not the easiest to work with. stubborn, strong-minded and feisty. you’re both so alike yet nothing has made your bloods boil more than each other. 

rating ✷ r (18+ minors dni!)

warnings ✷ (very quick) smut: fem receiving, kisses all over bodies, a needy but quick hj, p in v, dirty talk, praising, implied rough (consensual) sex / others: cursing, drinking alcohol, mention and use of guns and violence, male hurting female (?) but not between main characters, mentions of blood and wounds.

tropes ✷ enemies to lovers!!!, person a is all talk no bite + person b knows that but still pushes them, playful banter, hiding together in small spaces, fake dating (?), if one is hurt– the other goes a bit crazy, says ‘i dont care’ then cares 5 seconds later. 

word count ✷ 6k!

songs that fit the vibe ✷ i can see you - taylor swift | moth to a flame - swedish house mafia + the weeknd | king of my heart - taylor swift | attention - charlie puth | nonsense - sabrina carpenter

a/n ✷ so i made a poll a months ago and this trope + pairing won! i’ve honestly been wanting to write a dave lizewski one as well and got a request idea. so.. we will see lmao. i will probably post then maybe edit later if there's still things i don't like... also, if you couldn't tell but im kind of a swiftie so i will love to write fics inspired by whole ass albums y'all.

but i hope this is what u guys expected and wanted. i actually do love writing for tangerine. just gives into my delulu thoughts. also, if you guys would like a plain pwp fic and not all of this fluff and dialogue stuffed inside, pls let me know bc i am definitely into that idea. 🫡

“You had to go and get yourself shot… then you wonder why you have to wear a bulletproof vest. Fuckin’ hell.” 

Tangerine kept his voice at a hushed tone, basically talking under his breath as he strutted through the grand hall of the hotel. Golden light glossed over his figure, passing by couples who were at standing tables with their cocktails.

“Well, Thomas said-”

“Thomas didn’t say shit. Don’t get me fuckin’ started now.”

Lemon already knew Tan was in a bad mood. Another Thomas the Tank Engine factoid wasn’t a playful move right now.

“Hey, mate. Don’t get all fussy wit’ me. You’re just mad about your new partner for the night.” Lemon rolled his eyes.

“Can’t believe I can’t be held accountable of myself. I can handle it on my own but you had to call the fuckin’ princess-” 

“She’s good. Your denial is obnoxious, bruv. It’s only a night, you get in and get out.” Lemon replied, holding his wounded side as he laid in his bed back in England, “What happened between you two that you’ve got beef like this?”

“No time to explain nor do I have the patience.” He arrived at the small bar to the side of the room, “If I leave her behind, can I take half the pay that’s supposed to be hers?” Tangerine asked.

“She’s supposed to be wearing a red dress. You’ll see her there… and please don’t cause a scene.” His brother begged.

“No promises.” He replied before hanging up. 

Tangerine blows a sigh past his lips, quickly asking for his drink of choice before scanning the mass of people around him. His blue eyes could only search so fast for the man that the hit was called on, causing him an instant frustration when he’s already worried about you ruining things regardless of how long you’re together.

“He’s next to the woman in the tacky gold ballgown… about two feet away from the ice sculpture.” Your soft voice suddenly spoke next to him, “But, I didn’t need to tell you that, right?”

The smirk on your face burned at his nerves and you noticed the clench in his jaw.

“Well, if it isn’t the fuckin’ Queen herself.” He said in a stern tone, “What? Germany was too borin’ for ya? Had to figure out a way to ruin someone’s operation?”

“Lemon is the one who called me in, and it isn’t about you. It’s about the pay out… you’re bound to screw something up with your ‘shoot first, ask questions later’ tactic.” You trailed, rolling your eyes as you turned your head away.

“And I’m certainly not afraid to use that tonight and not your fucked up, painfully long mind games like some fuckin’ psycho thilling killer.” He spat as his drink was place in front of him.

You narrowed your eyes at him, “Fuck you.”

“Darling, I’m flattered, but we have more important things to do right now.” He lowly groaned, purposefully looking at his target so his back was facing toward you.

Behind his tall stature, you glimpsed past his shoulder and saw your target chatting up a woman. 

He won’t be smiling for long, you thought.

“Alright, I’ll wait for him to slip away, follow him and you go through the kitchen.” Tangerine said under his breath, keeping quiet for only you to hear him.

“To go where?” You ask, walking around him to stand face to face.

“Erm…” He sighed, “Whatever car or vehicle you got here in, drive yourself back to whatever place you’re staying and I’ll figure out how to wire you the money.” He shrugged, downing the rest of his drink.

He took a step but you placed your hand on the center of his chest, “Not so fast. I’m not going down if you make a mess of this.”

“I don’t make messes. Well, actually, I get away with them once I’ve done ‘em so, I don’t need to worry about a liability.” Tangerine smirked, a bit of a tilt to his head. Cheeky bastard.

“The only liability here is the one who is ready to pull the trigger in his back.” You said before huffing, “I’m not sorry for what happened in Paris, but that was my choice. So, I’m going with you because it’s our operation. You know… I don’t need a fucking helping hand either.” You practically growled.

The two of you held a long gaze, creating a tense eye contact before he sighed, “Didn’t even say anythin’ about Paris, but if you’d like to assume I’m still mad ‘bout that, be my guest, princess.”

His shoulder bumped yours, making you clench your jaw before quickly following behind his tall stature. While he seemed persistent, you grabbed his hand which made him stop in his tracks in the middle of the dance floor.

He turned, “Am I your babysitter?”

“No, you’re my date. Hold my hand, you idiot.” Your eyes pierced through his.

As he looked down at your hand, he slowly grasped it, your fingers intertwining with one another’s before he proceeded through the glamorous crowd.

Couples swayed and waltzed between each step you took, assuming you were unnoticed by your target. Tangerine kept his eyes on him, easy to with the frosty-white full head of hair he had slicked back. The woman in the tacky dress ran her hand down his shoulder, pressing her lips to his ear to whisper something which made you and Tangerine veer to the side at a standing table.

“Are they movin’?” He asked, facing his back toward them.

Your eyes smoothly shift, taking a quick glance at the assumed couple. You ran your hand down Tangerine’s arm, accidentally feeling how toned his bicep was through the thick fabric of his suit jacket. You almost glanced down, wanting to give another squeeze before clearing your throat. A heat rose on your cheeks as you turned your head to face away from him.

“Y-Yeah, near the bathroom. There’s also a backdoor that leads up to the second floor… lots of private rooms for reasons that are obvious.” You said in a hushed tone, moving away from him to the other side of the table.

“Alright, since you wanna tag along, I’ll follow them and you cover the door.” Tangerine suggested once again.

You furrowed your eyebrows, “You do understand what teamwork is, yes?”

He chuckled, “Yes, I go up there, shoot a few rounds, then we make a getaway.”

“Will you just trust me?”

“Your trust means nothing… I need to know you’re not going to fuck anything up. Just like in Paris.”

You smirked, “So you do have that against me.”

“Well, it’s not like it was your best. Leave me with a shot in the arm, Lemon on the ground and you, little miss greed, get away with your cash. If we all did this job for money, we wouldn’t be riskin’ our lives just runnin’ around killin’ or resucin’ people just for someone’s dime. You obviously do though.”

You narrowed your eyes, “You don’t know me…”

“Nor do you know me so…” He huffed, “Let’s just do what we have to do.”

There was tension between you, as if there was more fo a protective instinct than hate toward one another. You couldn't figure out Tangerine’s deal. Why was he so hostile toward you? Yes, what happened in Paris was fucked up, but he wasn’t the type to hold a grudge. He didn’t take shit from anyone, so why were you getting under his skin?

“Shit!” He grunted under his breath, seeing your target disappear into the hall.

The two of you hurry, yet still try to act casual to not raise eyebrows, and exit into the same hallway. As you push open the door, you hear the two talking in the stairwell before another door closes.

“You got your gun on you?” He asked as his hand slid into the back of his pants.

“Of course.” You scoffed, tearing up the slit in your dress. He saw the small pistol strapped to your thigh, making his mouth a bit dry.

He nodded, “Good…” 

Taking a quick breath, Tangerine opened the door. You slipped through and he followed behind, your backs facing one another as you scanned the hallway. It wasn’t narrow but if anyone slipped out of one of the rooms, they were right in your sights.

“I’ll take this one, you take that one.” He whispered, pointing his gun to the opposite door of his.

With your heart in your throat, you slowly crack the door open and don’t see anyone before a body flies from behind and slammed the door open from Tangerine’s side. The woman lied dead on the floor, blood all over his dress, and just as you turned around, a punch slid across your cheek. 

Instinctively, you ducked to dodge the second jab and swoop under to get on the other side of the man as Tangerine wrapped his arms around the guy to pull him to the ground.

Tan loudly grunted as he tried to gain control, basically attempting to straddle him in order to push his arm against his neck. Even with all his strength, the man gripped his hands around Tangerine’s arms to throw him off along with trying to push his knee between his crotch.

“Watch the door!” Tan directed to you. 

You nodded, catching your breath with your back against the wall by the door. The adrenaline ran through your veins and heard your heartbeat in your ears as one tear of blood dripped down your cheek. The crack of bones made you turn your head, seeing the man’s body go limp as Tan began to stand over him.

He quickly walked over the man, as if he was in the way, and comes to your side.

“He nicked you bad. Lemme see.” Tan said, your eyes meeting his as he held your cheek. The touch of his hand seemed to be some comfort, his thumb wiping the blood away and trying to see how bad the wound was.

“Bastard.” He muttered, “C’mon, let’s go before someone comes up.”

Without a word in, he grabbed your hand and dragged you behind his lead. You two headed for the exit door down the other side of the hall as you heard footsteps rumble from the other stairs you came up.

“Wait a minute.” Tan said, fiddling with his belt buckle.

Your eyes widen, “What on earth are you doing?”

He smirked, “Relax, darling. You flatter yourself too much.”

You rolled your eyes as the sound of his belt slid against the fabric of his belt loops before curling the leather strap around the door to keep it locked. The two of you fled down the stairs and suddenly found yourselves in the kitchen area. A few eyes followed as you both ran through, very obvious that you were running from something, but still aimed to get to some kind of exit.

With sudden luck, Tangerine saw his car across the street, instantly knowing which way he was supposed to go. Without skipping a beat, he grabbed your hand once more and the two of you ran across the street. Hopping into the passenger seat and Tan taking off was like a blur, just happening in seconds.

“Y/N?” Tan saying your name woke you from your trance.

“Huh?” You asked, shaking your head.

He quickly turned his head, “You alright?” He said with concern, one hand on the steering wheel and his foot easing off the gas.

“Y-Yeah, I’m okay. I don’t know what happened back there.” You trailed, a bit embarrassed. You were never one to let your guard down, well– enough to get hit right smack in the face.

“Are you sure?”

You turned your attention to him, “I’m fine, why wouldn’t I be?” You asked rhetorically.

“‘Cause of that big cut on your cheek.”

You narrowed your eyes, “Alright, what’s your big plan now, Einstein? Were just going to sleep in your car and hope we don’t wake up decapitated?”

He half-chuckled, “You truly think so little of me, don’t you?”

“Is that rhetorical?”

Tan rolled his blue eyes, “We’re goin’ somewhere safe.”

– – –

You wanted to believe you were strolling into some kind of trap. The lobby had a classic aesthetic to it, pale gold wallpaper and a wall of keys behind the person at the small front desk. You two placed your go-bags on the red carpeted ground as Tangerine checked into a room.

“Hello Mr. Tangerine.”

Oh, great. He’s some guest of honor here.

“‘Ello, Colin. My usual room.”

“Is that what you say in front of all the girls?” You tilted your head, standing behind him.

He rolled his eyes, “‘Cuse her.”

The man chuckled, crinkles by his eyes, “How many nights are you staying this time?”

This time. You could scoff out loud but you didn’t want to hear the tude from him.

“Just overnight. Nothin’ too serious.”

“Well, enjoy your stay, as always.” The man nodded before Tangerine thanked him.

The two of you head toward the old elevator, watching him quickly press the up button before you stand by his side. You half chuckled, “I’ve never seen you act so kindly toward anyone, tell me, does he see you bring girls through here all the time or-”

“Has anyone ever told you to shut your pie hole?”

“Hmm, not verbally. But, those eyes of your say enough for me… you’re too predictable, sometimes, Tan.”

He gave you a lingering look as the door opened, passing him into the elevator. The two of you make your way to the fifth floor and the hall is eerily quite for a hotel full of private contractors and assassins. You had your hands behind your back then patiently waited for Tangerine to jiggle the key into the lock, opening a door to a huge room with a surprisingly wide view.

“You’d think the curtains were closed.” You muttered as he walked over, closing them anyways.

Suddenly, he stripped from his suit jacket and you couldn’t help but see how tight his button up was around his biceps and chest.

“Did you get that a size too small?” You ask as you chunk your heels into the corner.

“Well, I certainly can’t kill fuckin’ bloaks wearing baggy clothes now.”

“But, you can in a three piece suit?” You cocked your eyebrow.

He licked his lips, “As if your dress is a flexible material.” Tangerine said as he pulled his rings off, placing them on the night stand.

“I can say the same for your pants.”

Tangerine wanted to look down but didn’t give into your comment. You place your bag down on the bed, grabbing your silk pajamas nearly folded on top and changed in the bathroom.

“God, just go to bed. We’ve got a long day tomorrow.” You somewhat groaned.

You sit on the top of the bed, unfolding the duvet before shoving it off to get underneath them.

Tangerine paused, “What the fuck do you you’re doin’?”

You furrowed your eyebrow, “This thing called going to sleep. Try it sometime, you’d be less grouchy.”

He rolled his eyes, “I know that, smartass, I mean what’re you doin’ in the bed that I’m goin’ to be sleepin’ in too?”

You rolled over, putting your weight on your elbows, “I know you’re dramatic but this takes the cake for top performances.”

He faked a laugh, “If you don’t get your ass out of that bed in two seconds, I’ll throw you in the tub with a pillow.”

“Oh, wouldn’t you like to. Fine, do it.” You said before laying flat into the mattress, staring straight at the ceiling.

He didn’t care for your equal amount of sarcasm, but he just gave you a cocked eyebrow.

“Okay, fine. I’d rather sleep on the floor anyways.” He said, stretching his arms up and behind his head. Your eyes quickly admired his muscles before turning back.

“Be my guest, princess.” You scoffed, slipping on your pajama shorts, “I’ll enjoy my big comfy bed.”

You pulled the heavy duvet over your waist, curling up with the dense pillow beneath your head. 

Tangerine stood there, biting the inside of his cheek as he watched you roll on your side. He tilted his head back before unbuttoning his shirt and tossing it on the desk chair. Although your eyes were closed, his side of the bed sunk in and you tried to hold back your smile at his faded stubbornness.

With your backs facing one another, you two just listened to the silence of the city. It gave you a moment to think of Paris– the last time you were with one another or much rather supposed to be against each other. You were a double agent, not exactly proud of it but you let greed take over your motivated justice. 

Having to scam Lemon and Tangerine wasn’t your finest hour either, you thought about it for months and finally coming face to face with Tangerine (out of the two, he wasn’t the one you would want to bump into again), all the guilt came rushing back like the snap of an elastic band.

– – –

The morning sun runs through the thin silk of the curtains, shining over your bodies in the bed. You wake up to the sound of light snoring, happy that you could sleep through it, and Tangerine in a deep slumber with his arm over the bed. He suddenly looked like innocence, so soft and tender, simply laying there like it was any other day.

You sit up, putting your hair out of your face then head to the bathroom. When you turn the light on, you’re almost surprised to see your reflection. Forgetting about the scar against your cheek, you look more rough around the edges. You sigh as you run your fingers over it, remembering the way Tangerine did last night.

After washing up, you go back out and Tangerine is now standing up and stretching his arms above his head. Your eyes quickly shift up his body, admiring the tattoos in their random places and how the band of his briefs rest on his hips. You sealed your lips from smiling at how sharp his v-line was accompanied by the happy trail disappearing into his pants.

“Sleep good with that stick in your ass?” You retort, passing him.

He rolled his eyes, “...You’re annoying, ya know that?”

“Oh, you’ve made that clear.” You mocked him as you closed the curtains more, “That’s why I love to do it.”

Tangerine flicked on the lamp, giving the room a warm glow.

“Alright, I say we lay low today. Better to be out of sight and–”

You cut him off, “Stuck in this room together?... are you trying to kill me t–”

He then put his hand over your mouth, looking deep into your eyes, “Yes, stuck in this room where we can keep an eye on each other and you can’t screw me over again.”

Your heart stopped for a split second, as if he couldn’t have been more of the controlling one. He took his hand away and you gulped, “Yep. Fine. Fair.”

Tangerine pressed his tongue against the inside of his cheek before you go to your bag in the chair that’s pushed in the corner of the room. You slightly bend over to look inside your duffle and his icy eyes can’t help but look up the back of your thighs and straight at your ass and lower back. How he could easily put his hands on your hips and make you hold onto something.

He shook his head, feeling like he was coming down with something to even imagine that thought.

You pulled out an old novel and sat yourself back on the bed, hoping that the hours would pass as you sank further into the broken-in mattress.

Tangerine sat down in the chair nudged into the corner, adjacent from your view, and he pulled out his gun that was conveniently tucked into the back of his pants.

“Are you actually holding me hostage?” You furrowed your brows, but didn’t take your eyes from your sentence.

“Whatever fantasy you’d like you believe.” He trailed, opening his gun and emptying his rounds into his palm.

– – –

Suddenly, you leaped out of a deep sleep. Your book laid open on your stomach while an extra pillow was between your legs. Your eyes fluttered open, thinking the past few days has been a dream, until you noticed Tangerine wasn’t sitting in the chair. You quickly looked around before hearing the bathroom door open and he stepped out, shirtless and in new dark slacks that rested on his hips.

Your mouth became dry. How could you dislike him so much yet here you are, ready to jump his bones as he crossed the room.

“What are you getting dressed for?” You asked, rubbing your eyes.

He half-chuckled at your groggy voice, “I want a drink.”

“Oh, like you’re not just going to abandon me here like I did you?... Where you go, I go.” You warned him.

He rolled his eyes, “Don’t be so dramatic.”

“A bit hypocritical coming from you.”

Tangerine just ignored your smart comment and opened the door, letting you through first before he followed. His eyes, once again, trace your lower back and trailed down your legs. His cheeks flushed pink as he quickly looked away, clearing his throat as he caught up to you so you two were walking side by side.

You pushed the faded down button as you pushed a big breath past your lips. Tangerine put his back against the wall and crossed his arms, his muscles basically restraining in his light button up. As you turned around, you rolled your eyes– but not at him, just at yourself. How could you have any little feeling for someone who also annoyed you to your core?

He took your silence as a bit of a tease. To be fair, you two didn’t really know one another. You met once before and then you simply betrayed him. Quickly, you were dead to him, but now you’re forced to be together and it raised an important question to himself too. Why was he helping someone who obviously can’t be trusted? 

Tangerine furrowed his eyebrows at that thought, knowing he would have thrown you to the wolves last night after you closed your eyes. He played with his watch a bit before the elevator dinged and caught both of your attentions.

After entering, the low-sounding shifting mechanics of the elevator were the only sounds between you two. You heard Tangerine sniffle, seeing him stretch his neck out of the corner of your eye, but you kept a straight view to the doors. While Tangerine thought you were continuing to give him the silent treatment, you were lost in your own thoughts of the past.

You flashbacked to your last night in Paris together, and remembered how the guilt creeped up on you knowing that, in a few hours, you’d have to betray both Lemon and Tangerine. Before knowing them, you didn’t care, but now that you’ve realized how hard you were falling for Tan, it felt like a double edged sword. If you didn’t do it, maybe you could stay with him– have a life together. But, if you went through with your selfish heist, you’d lose the guy who made you comfortable with being vulnerable after a long time. 

Obviously, you regretted your decision.

“Is this what you want?” You simply asked.

Tangerine quickly turned his head, “What?”

You rolled your eyes before facing his direction, “This.” You gestured between the two of you, “The weird animosity and constantly arguing and nit-picking?”

He never thought you’d be so bold to point it out, “I mean, we don’t like each other. Simple, isn’t it?”

“I guess…” You trailed, facing back toward the doors.

Tangerine licked his lips, wondering if he should utter the words on his tongue.

“...But, that doesn’t mean we can’t start over.”

You looked over your shoulder once more before turning around to him, “You mean that?”

He arched his eyebrow, “Should I regret it now?”

Just as the elevator dinged, the doors slowly opened and the hotel lobby appeared empty. You smirked to yourself, “Why don’t we catch up over that drink, huh?” You sort of teased– not sure if it had purpose.

– – –

Your drink tasted smooth, easily trailing down your throat as you leaned your head back to finish off the rest of the liquor in your glass. Once you tilted your head back straight, you were met with Tangerine’s signature eyebrow arch.

“Don’t worry, I’m paying for my own drinks.” You sighed, placing your glass back down on the wooden table top.

“As long as I don’t got to carry you back up to the room.” He sighed, sounding more defeated than witty, then his blue eyes glanced down then back into your eyes.

You hummed, running your finger along the rim of the empty glass. 

“‘right so, what’ve you been doin’ since we last…” He cleared his throat, “saw one other?”

You crossed your leg over the other, “Not much. Actually, it’s the first time I’ve been out for a while. After leaving you guys, I laid low in Tuscany.”

“For how long?”

You shrugged, “Five months? I was on the countryside and I wanted to be alone…” then, you smirked, “I heard that you were in Kyoto.” 

Tangerine could chuckle about it now, “For a bit. Had a job to do for some psychotic, fucked up family. The dad called in us, they were all turin’ on each other. Whole fuckin’ thing…”

“As in…” You trailed, “Against one another? The whole family?”

He just nodded before taking a sip of his drink.

You raised your eyebrows, “Wow… and you got out with no bruises or cuts? Bullet holes?”

Tangerine licked his lips before he presented the side of his neck, lighter skin over his tanner tone to show the scar. You carefully reached out, brushing your fingers against it which made a tingle go up his spine. You sit back down as he turned back in his chair, and he seemed to tense up.

“Amazing you survived it.” You sealed your lips.

He crossed his arms, “I supposed…”

A comfortable silent fell between you, the light, jazz music playing at a low, and Tangerine’s eyes trailed up the side of your bare leg. He didn’t mean to stare this much, but he felt more vulnerable than usual. One thing you knew is that Tangerine was a layered person, you had to take time to get to the center of him and realize he’s not so cold once you get to know him.

“Five months in Tuscany, I bet that was lovely.”

“Not really. I isolated the whole time… I wanted to be by myself, but I felt bad about what happened… what I did in Paris.” You admitted, but didn’t look into his eyes, fearing that he would turn on you in a second.

Tangerine sighed, “You had to do your job, we did ours… that’s ‘bout all that can be said.” 

Assuming from the lack of eye contact and his tone, he seemed hurt too. You could easily let it boost your ego, but, you actually felt a relief. This hatred you’ve held against each other has finally come down and even though it wasn’t actually said, both of you can feel hostility leave the room.

You bit the inside of your cheek, “Remember, we’re starting over. Clean slate. I hope I’m making a good impression so far.” You raised your eyebrows, lifting your glass again just to drink the mixture of watered down liquor. 

He chuckled, “You’re just lovely.”

The comment made your face get hot. You blame the accent and how it can just get under your skin.

“I don’t think you’ve ever called me something so nice.”

Tangerine smirked, “Funny since we’ve just met, darling.”

Darling.

It was the first time you heard it as a term of endearment then pure spite.

You rolled your eyes, but you could humor that Tangerine was going along with it. This new cheeky side of him was something you didn’t think existed– maybe it was the liquor talking, but you hoped it wasn’t just that simple.

“So, what brings you here?” You continued to tease, placing your elbows on the table, “Business… or pleasure?” Your hand laid on top of his, brushing your fingertips along the chunky rings that perfectly fit his fingers.

Multiples thoughts sounded through both your minds.

“Maybe it’s the liquor.” “Maybe we’re a little over our heads.” “Maybe we’re bored.”

But, Tangerine held your hand on top of the table, gently holding it as his thumb grazes over your knuckles.

“Depends…” He trailed, now leaning in too, “What are you here for?”

– – –

In just a few minutes, you two were back in the room you felt trapped in for hours.

Tangerine pressed your back against the wall, a tingle running up your spine from the coolness of the wallpaper. Your lips pressed together over and over, tilting your head before biting his bottom lip. He effortlessly lifted you up with his hand under the back of your thighs, and your ankles meet around his back.

He needed so bad, desperate even… and the feeling was mutual.

He put you down on your feet again, pressing a kiss against your scarred cheek then another on your jaw. His light kisses run down the middle of your breasts as his hand lifted up the end of your skirt. You pushed your hips out as your back was against the wall still, watching him pull down your panties in an instant. You kick them to the side and Tangerine placed your leg over his shoulder, kisses along your inner thigh and your hand ran through the front of his curls.

Suddenly, his tongue ran over your swollen clit before sucking on it. With one hand in his hair, the other caressing your breast and running your thumb over your nipple.

Tangerine panted, moving his hand against your pussy lips. He pushed them apart, showing your tight hole and how you clench around nothing. He lowly groaned, running his fingers over your clit before sliding his two fingers into your pussy. You bite your bottom lip to hold back the moan stuck in your throat, watching him suck your clit and finger you at the same time.

Just as your climax neared, he felt your cunt tighten around his fingers. He couldn’t end it like this so, he took them away. You let your leg down, watching him come back up and tower over you.

“If I’m goin’ to make you cum…” He sighed, “I’m gonna be deep inside you when you fucking crumble.” He said so low before pressing his fingers against your tongue, and you tasted yourself.

You pulled his hand back, running your thumbs over his tattooed hand.

“Not if I make you cum first.” You trailed, moving his hand down so you could kiss him.

He could drop to his knees in an instant, but Tangerine surprisingly kept his composure. 

You smirked as you pushed him toward the bed, the back of his knees hitting it to make him sit down. As you stood in front of him, he leaned on his elbows as he watched your dress drop to the floor. It pooled at your ankles and when his eyes shifted back up, so glossed over, your bare body was the center of his attention.

“Hmm, I don’t think you’ll last.” You taunted.

As much as he could snap back, you straddled him and pulled apart his tightly buttoned shirt. Your hands ran over his toned and tatted chest before reaching down to his pants, unzipping the fly and he shuffled a bit to shift them off his hips. His cock was hard, restrained from his boxers and you felt flattered.

You giggled, leaning forward to share a slow kiss with him. Your bare pussy rubbed against his cock as you moved closer to him. A low groan mumbled between your makeout, and you pushed him back so you two both fell on the bed.

Your hands pressed into each side of the mattress, gaining strength to help yourself grind against his hard. His big hands tightly held your hips as you continued your smooth momentum, whimpering at your clit being rubbed by your harsh grind.

As heat rose in the room, your right hand dipped between the two of you, and ran over his hard cock once more. Tan’s lips now desperately met your jaw before taking a light bite at your neck. The feeling of your hand caressing through his boxers could make him release right there.

Becoming more impatient, you finally pushed your hand into the band of his boxers and he once more moved his hips to shift out of them. 

“Fuck, your cock is so big… can barely hold it with my hand. God, I want you to stretch me out…” You moaned, “Is that okay?”

You purposefully let him believe that he was in charge, and you were falling into the submissive role. Tangerine gained a bit of confidence from your desperate comments, and he sat more up on the bed.

“Fucking christ…” Is all he could say.

He moved the swollen and red tip against your wet slit, also aching and needing your walls to wrap around him now. At first there was pressure, pushing the tip inside your hole then slowly guiding your hips down to completely take in every inch of his cock. 

Once he bottomed out, your body lightly shook as your lips brushed against his. He was fully inside you, the tight and warm feeling making him wither beneath you.

Tangerine moved his hand, kissing your shoulder, “God, you feel like fuckin’ heaven.”

“Don’t stop. Please…” You huffed.

– – –

Then, it was morning. 

The rising sun peaked through the small split of the curtains. As you tried to shift, your body ached throughout every muscle. A small groan left your lips, but you were pulled back by a strong arm wrapped around your waist.

It snapped you back into reality. Last night really happened… and you were okay with that.

Tangerine’s tattooed arm unconsciously tightened around you, holding you close still as he still slept behind you. You barely look over your shoulder and saw his face, his eyes still shut and his curls looked wild.

You faintly smile as you turn around to face him, and that’s what woke him up. He pulled his arms back and rubbed his eyes from the brightness of the sun coming in. You run your finger along a curl on his forehead, pushing it to the top of his head and your heart melted from the sight of those blue eyes.

“Did last night really happen?” You mumbled, but with a faint smile on your lips.

He placed his hand gently on your cheek, caressing his thumb against your jaw. 

“I think the real question is…” He trailed, “Do we stay another night or go back to pretending to not know each other's existences?”

You bit your bottom lip, lightly giggling, “I think we pick secret option three and go somewhere else. Get away for a while… see where this is going. Don’t you?”

Just at that moment, Tangerine’s phone vibrated in his pants that were on the floor next to the bed. He turned over on his other side, reaching down to pull it out and reading a text Lemon just sent.

“Got a call about a job in Budapest. Are you in or overstaying your weekend?”

Tangerine smirked at himself, then felt your lips press against his neck. You placed another kiss on his shoulder, leaving a tender love bite before he turned back around to kiss you. Maybe it was the natural thrill of the chase, but you loved the not knowing. 

Whatever was next, you could only hope that he kept it interesting.