#(that's just my catch-all tag for any swaps I think)
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ministarfruit · 9 months ago
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pink-blue heterochromia outfit swap
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bweirdart · 1 year ago
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EVENT OVER! THANKS EVERYONE WHO JOINED IN U ALL DID AN AMAZING JOB <3 SEE YOU AGAIN NEXT YEAR IN MARCH FOR #mARTch OR NEXT OCTOBER (2024) FOR A NEW SET OF PROMPTS!!!!!
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OC-TOBER 2023 PROMPTS!!
general tag: #oc-tober / my prompts: #bweirdOCtober
F.A.Q:
Do I have to draw EVERY DAY?
NO! I highly encourage skipping as many days as you need to avoid burnout! There are 10 main days in the event (marked with a ⭐ star) that you can focus on if you don't feel up to doing every day, or you can choose your own adventure and just do the prompts you personally like!
Do I have to DRAW?
NO! You can also write fanfiction snippets, repost older art that fits the theme, tweet headcanons/backstory, roleplay in-character as your oc ... genuinely anything that fits the theme is OK!!
Can I start early?
YES! I understand some people work at a slower pace and might need a head start! So long as you wait until October to post it, you can start working as early as you need!
I missed the start of the event .. do I have to catch up?
NO! Please don't stress about days you missed, you're allowed to just skip to the current prompt!
RULES:
1. MAKE FRIENDS! The community is the best part of this event .. please try to follow new people, ask questions about ocs you like, compliment people's styles, ask friends to create with you, etc!
2. TAKE IT EASY! Skip a day if you're tired, busy or just not interested in the prompt. You don't have to catch up on it later. This is supposed to be fun, not work!
3. BE KIND! Please think about the people around you - don't give people unwarranted harsh criticism, content warn for themes/imagery in your work that could trigger someone, don't create anything hateful, etc
MORE:
text version / tips and ideas on bweird.art or below ↓
star = main prompts | no star = optional
INTRO WEEK
1: FAVE OC ⭐
-Which of your characters is your favourite right now?
2: NEW OC
-Who is your newest OC?
-Design a new OC right now
3: OLD OC ⭐
-Do you remember the first OC you ever made?
-Is there an OC you haven't drawn in a long time?
4: RE-DESIGN
-An OC who has changed a lot over the years
-Take an old OC and update their design right now
 
BACKSTORY WEEK
5: RELATIONSHIPS ⭐
-Who is important to your OC?
-Do they have a partner?
-Do they have a best friend?
-Are they close to their family?
6: SYMBOL
-What imagery do you associate with your oc?
-Are there any colours, flowers, animals or concepts that symbolize them?
7: PERSONALITY ⭐
-How does your OC behave?
-What are their positive traits?
-What are their negative traits?
-Are they extroverted or introverted?
8: PAST
-What was your OC like as a child?
-Where did they grow up?
-Are there any significant moments from their past that shaped who they are?
9: FUTURE ⭐
-Does your OC have a goal they're working towards?
-What will your OC look like when they get older
-Do you have a planned ending for their story?
PALETTE WEEK
10: pumpkin patch palette
#251604 #1E3807 #5B5E1A #A2A657 #EBA00F #F3ECCC
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11: hot cocoa palette
#520B13 #BB382E #E27E6D #88392C #AF5D40 #E1AFA4
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12: midnight zone palette
#000007 #000049 #183885 #004D4F #0E8788 #FFF1C0
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13: peachy palette
#DE6450 #DB9171 #FFC1AE #FEE1AD #FFF2E0 #D9D8D8
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14: haunted house palette
#552506 #6E25AA #ED690B #F925A0 #8F8BA7 #A6C1AA
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FUN + GAMES WEEK
15: MEME ⭐
-Post memes that remind you of your OC
-Draw your OC as a meme
-Fill out a character meme (classic deviantart style)
16: FOOD
-What is your OC's favourite food?
-What is their least favourite?
-Can they cook?
17: EYES-CLOSED ⭐
-Draw your OC with your eyes closed! No cheating!
-Write a scene without looking at the keyboard! Keep the typos in!
18: SWAP
-Swap the style or aesthetic of two of your OCs
-Species or gender swap AU
-Invert an OC's colour scheme
19: INSPIRATION ⭐
-Is your OC inspired by any pre-existing characters?
-Are there any particular songs/lyrics that inspired something about one of your OCs
-Do you have a dedicated pinterest moodboard for your character?
20: INVENTORY
-What does your OC carry around with them on a daily basis?
-Are there any objects that have sentimental value for them?
-Loot drop for your DnD OC
 
FRIENDS WEEK
21-25:
There's no specific daily prompts for this week, but here are some ideas you can try ...
-Art trades with friends who are doing the event with you
-Your OC interacting with a friend's OC
-Gift art for someone whose OCs you like
-Work together and collaborate on something with a friend
-Roleplay an OC scene together with someone
 
HALLOWEEN WEEK
26: FEAR ⭐
-What is your OC scared of?
-Draw one of your OCs trying to scare the others
27: MONSTER
-Do you have any monster OCs? (eg: vampires, werewolves, creatures, ghosts...)
-Draw a human OC as a monster
-Design a new monster
28: TRICK
-Play a trick on an OC
-Do you have an OC who would play tricks on people?
29: TREAT
-What is your OC's favourite halloween candy?
-Give an OC a special treat to make up for yesterday's trick
30: MAGIC
-Do any of your characters have magical powers?
-Give an OC a magical or cursed artifact
-Create a magic-using OC like a witch or wizard
27: COSTUME ⭐
-What is your OC dressing as for halloween?
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cheesiedomino · 9 months ago
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RentABoyfriend.com ꙳ ੭ * ‧
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synopsis: you’re tired of being single so you to take an unusual route in helping with that— but what happens when you start catching real romantic feelings for your rental boyfriend?
genre: seo changbin x fem!reader | fake relationship/dating au wc: 5.1k tags/warnings: fluff, v minor angst, mild cursing, (kinda) nerdy changbin, use of pet names, mentions of alcohol usage, just overall very cute story dw <33
[this is part of my valentine’s series where i write a short story for each member surrounding themes of love, newfound romance, relationship hardships & more.]
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“I have a date tomorrow guys.”
Everyone’s head instantly lifts up from their phones at this sudden announcement, collectively drawing their attention at you. You weren’t expecting all of them to gasp and swap such looks of genuine confusion. It’s starting to make you think maybe this situation was a lot more serious than you’ve bargained it out to be.
You couldn’t fathom it either honestly, the realization of you going out with someone probably won’t settle in until you’re physically on the date. Based on their initial responses though, you might regret everything you’re about to say, but it’s far too late to retract any of your statements now.
“No way.. with who??” Danielle is the first out of everyone to ask.
Taehyung chimes in as well, “Yeah, who’s the lucky person? They’ve gotta be something seriously special to be talking to you.”
Well, you suppose you could put it that way.
You already have a preconceived notion of what they’re going to think of this “idea”. Mentally preparing yourself to receive a flood of questions and critique from your close friends.
“Actually… I rented him. For the week.”
Now they’re all looking at you like you’ve officially lost it. The room got scarily quiet, no one wanted to be the first to speak. You should’ve anticipated on their reactions being like this, it isn’t everyday someone just openly admits to buying a partner online. Nowadays there’s a lucrative market for just about anything, when you stumbled upon an ad for this service called ‘RentABoyfriend.com’ you didn’t think much of it. You laughed the concept off at first, thinking how lonely people must be to buy someone else’s time.
But the ads kept popping up, they wouldn’t stop showing in almost every YouTube video you were watching— even one of your favorite YouTubers promoted them before! So one day you finally decided to check this website out, you wanted to see what the hype’s all about so you signed up just for shits and giggles. You weren’t expecting to actually be somewhat interested in trying this thing out, but after going through a couple different profiles and reading hundreds of positive reviews you were practically sold.
“You rented out a boyfriend..? Seriously ___? I mean, I’m not judging but you’re a gorgeous girl you can easily get a boyfriend without paying for someone’s companionship, I don’t see why you need to rent one.” Mark bluntly expressed his opinion, he was probably the most outspoken out of all of you guys.
Taehyung and Danielle both agreed in unison, it’s practically 3 against 1 at this point. You knew you should’ve waited to tell them but you weren’t anticipating on them being this judgmental about it. You were hoping for a little more support, as they’re all way more experienced than you in the dating scene and could lend some helpful advice about your first date, ever.
See, the thing is you’ve never tried dating before so you wouldn’t know the first thing about it or what to expect from your future partner. You’ve never had a boyfriend, let alone held hands or kissed someone of the opposite sex. Being in your twenties it’s kind of embarrassing to say you’ve never done those things, but you thought what better way to try it out than renting a full-on experience that can give you just that? Well minus the kissing part, but you can make it work.
You were skeptical of doing this whole ‘rent-a-boyfriend’ thing at first because you didn’t think there’d be anyone you’d find suitable enough. A big part of the reason that you’re still single is because you’re extremely picky, you want to date a guy who’s so perfect that he must’ve came straight out of an indie romance film. Your friends would tease you for having such unrealistic standards when it came to dating but you were the all-or-nothing type, you’ll be single with fifty cats before you settle for less. Renting a boyfriend is definitely an unconventional idea of easing into dating but you thought it might be worth a try anyway.
What’s the worse that could happen?
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( 1 day earlier )
Hovering your cursor over the bold red text of the website, you read over the main rules before going on to select the person you want for your date.
‘The rules are simple:
You are allowed to see only ONE person at a time, if you want to switch boyfriends you’ll have to pay a $50 fee.
MUST be over 18 to rent a boyfriend, we have implemented an age verification system before the date as we do not tolerate anyone under this age to use our services.
NO kissing, or sexual intimacy allowed. If this is found out later on by our agency we will terminate your contract and ban you from using our services in the future.
Remember to have fun !! ^_^ Our services are great for people who are new to dating or have never been in a relationship. We provide the ~ultimate~ boyfriend experience to all our clients. Customer satisfaction is 100% guaranteed ! (NO REFUNDS)’
Well jeez… they seemed a bit strict but you can deal with those rules and restrictions for the most part.
After hours of skimming through hundreds of profiles, you have a hard time choosing which you like most. Did you want an artsy, shy kind of guy? The tattooed, bad boy aesthetic type? You really couldn’t pick one until you stumble upon a particular profile that catches your eye almost immediately.
SEO CHANGBIN | 168 CM | PART-TIME LIFEGUARD | 24 | *POPULAR ↝
5 Facts About Me: I’ve traveled to over 50+ different countries and counting (ask me which my favorites are), I can speak 4 languages (working on my fifth), love to sing and used to have a rap trio with my buddies from college, I can & will easily lift you up ;) also have a secret talent for cooking, there’s nothing I can’t do!
Why Choose Me? First of all, why not choose me? I’m the best candidate for whatever kind of date you need, something casual, social gatherings, weddings, you name it! I’m very social and can make most people laugh (unless they’re the literal Grinch reincarnated), I’m able to get along well with anyone and just love to have a good time. I hope we can get to know each other and make great memories in the future :)
Going through his pictures you couldn’t believe someone was capable of being this humanely attractive. Don’t even get started on those impeccable muscles either… He really had to sport them in every other one of his photos, wearing the tightest shirts to show the outline of his insanely sculpted frame. You might have just been mesmerized from his godlike visuals alone. They even had a Valentine’s Day deluxe package that comes with seven dates in total for half the price, which they specified was for a limited time only.
$600 later you’ve got a full week of dates lined up with the hottest guy you’ve ever seen in all your years of living. You should’ve definitely went shopping before considering all this because now you actually have a reason to get dolled up for someone.
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You were so nervous about going on this date you almost cancelled last minute out of fear. Typing out several different elaborate paragraphs to Changbin on why you couldn’t make it. You didn’t have his real phone number, it was all through an app facilitated by the rental company that was included in the package. Even though you were feeling overwhelmed and practically shaking with anxiety about meeting up with a guy, you still forced yourself to go anyway. You didn’t just dish out all that money just to not show up and waste his time on top of all that.
Your rental boyfriend texted you the location to meet at, it was near a train station so you both could see each other out in a public open space. The outfit you wore was fairly simple, a black mini skirt with warm tights underneath and a cropped turtleneck sweater. You accessorized the look with some dainty jewelry, a thin scarf, and knee high boots to pull everything together. It wasn’t something you usually wore but you had certain clothes you saved for a special occasion like this.
Upon your arrival, you notice him standing near a vending machine and waves over at you with the biggest smile plastered on his face. You awkwardly wave back, giving a soft smile as you slowly walk up to him. He looks even better in person, you don’t even feel adequate enough to be in such a gorgeous man’s presence. No wonder he’s so popular on the site, he’s practically unreal.
“Hi, you must be ___. It’s so nice to finally meet you, might I add you look really beautiful today, I think you’re making my heart race just by looking at you. Happy Valentine’s Day!” Changbin introduces himself, buttering you up with some sweet compliments before handing you the most insane bouquet of roses you’ve ever seen.
You take the flowers and almost stumble backwards from how heavy they were, “Wow, thank you!” Changbin prevents you from falling, quickly coming up behind you to get your balance back.
“Careful honey, can’t have you injured on our first date!” He voices with concern, “I hope you love the idea I came up with, I’ve only been to this place once before but I’m sure it’s still as fun as I remember it, let’s go!” Eagerly grabbing your hand to begin the journey, he turns around again to examine your body language.
“You seem a little tense babe? Do you need a massage?” He asks in a concerned tone again, this is all really beginning to freak you out. You know this is what you signed up for but this was all starting to feel a bit too personal, all the nicknames and sweet talk he’s giving is just something you aren’t used to.
“Uh, no! It’s o-okay.” You shook your head, denying anything suspicious going on. Truth be told you were barely able to contain your composure right now.
Changbin keeps on insisting, “The massage is included in the package so you don’t have to worry about getting charged extra.”
“N-no it’s okay, really. I’m just nervous that’s all, sorry I just don’t meet up with guys…” you shyly admit, finding it hard to look him in the eye.
He nods in understanding, “No need to be nervous with me sweetheart. I’m here to make you feel as comfortable as possible.” The smile he flashes at you instantly makes you warm on the inside, he seems like a genuine, caring person. You think things might go well for you after all.
The rest of the night was full of only good vibes and laughter by the end of it all. Changbin took you to an adult arcade that had old video games like Pac-Man, Super Mario, and Space Invaders, the other side was a bar where people could sit, drink, and socialize. He bought all your drinks that night, let you use up most of his tokens and overall had the most fun you could’ve ever had with someone. He was so easygoing but also knew when to act super caring and would be all lovey dovey with you. He was gentle, nurturing, and could have conversations about anything. You loved that he’d randomly drop some interesting fact you never knew about, or talked about a certain niche topic that he’d go on multiple rants over. It didn’t feel like you were renting someone out to date you, it felt natural— like you’ve known him for longer than a couple hours. Changbin walked you home and held your hand the entire time, along with the flowers he provided a teddy bear and a heart shaped box of chocolates. If that didn’t scream boyfriend goals then you don’t know what does.
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The next day you wake up to Changbin blowing your phone up this morning. You had over 26 messages from him, which was pretty excessive in your humble opinion. The first thing he said was good morning then he goes on to express how fun yesterday was and he can’t wait to do it again. He even sent a couple mirror selfies of him at the gym, ‘conceited much?’ You thought. But then again, if you were Seo Changbin you’d probably be full of yourself too.
For today’s date you wore a pretty red sundress that made your skin glow in the sunlight. It’ll definitely get him to compliment you even more— which you secretly love when he does. Changbin calls you before he heads out to the date, letting you know how excited he is to see you again. You couldn’t stop smiling like an idiot on the train as you made your way to the destination, thinking about what he’s planned for you two next. This time you’ll be meeting up at a park but you still have no clue what you’re doing.
Changbin texts you where exactly he is in the park, it was pretty huge so it took you a while to get to him. As you get closer you see him sitting on a large blanket by the lake, on top of it were a bunch of different foods and snacks scattered all around that came out of a huge picnic basket. You were speed walking at this point trying to get to him. His arms opened out for a hug and you lean right into him, what you didn’t expect was for him to suddenly stand up and lift you in his arms to swing around you like a doll.
“Put me down I’m scared of heights!” You squeal out in fear of being too high up in the air. Maybe you really should’ve taken the bio on his profile more seriously when he mentioned certain things.
Finally putting you down after minutes go by of you protesting, Changbin sits you back onto the blanket. He brought an assortment of breads, cheese, fruits, lemonade that he made himself and a couple seltzers. You’ve never seen anyone put such time and effort into a date before, even being here with him is like living in a daydream. He was definitely succeeding in making you feel comfortable, which is something you never thought was possible with men. He actually took his time getting to know you and didn’t sound arrogant whenever he talked about himself, Changbin was so different than other guys who’ve tried hitting on you in the past. He was actually respectful, intelligent, and could easily carry a conversation without long, awkward pauses.
He was literally everything you’re looking for in a guy. But you’ll be seeing him for this week only then it’s bye bye forever. That revelation makes you a little upset, but you try pushing those thoughts in the back of your mind. It’s irrelevant and unnecessary to think about. Yet you can’t help but wonder about certain things though, wanting to know more about his job and what it’s like on a daily basis for him.
“Can I ask you something? I need you to answer it honestly.” You say out of nowhere, hoping that didn’t come out as weird as you thought.
Changbin nods, “of course, shoot.”
“How many clients do you usually get?”
This question definitely catches him off guard, he’s never really been asked this before and he’s debating on if he should as it might be a breach of privacy.
“I don’t think I can answer that, sorry.” He responds in the nicest way possible, but deep down he wants to know why you’d want to know how many other people he sees a day.
You were going to push him a bit more to try and get an answer but you decide to let it go and just enjoy the rest of the picnic. You didn’t want to bring the mood down with your odd questions and/or end up making him feel so uncomfortable that he won’t want to see you anymore. It was definitely something you shouldn’t have asked but you were curious to know anyway. Overall besides that small incident, you had another wonderful time with Changbin and couldn’t wait for tomorrow to come any faster.
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Changbin had a foolproof way of getting you to blush like a giddy high school teen whenever he texted you. He’d always refer to you as ‘pretty girl’ or ‘princess’ which gave you insane amount of butterflies. You loved how clingy he could get and would double text when you don’t reply fast enough, always needing constant attention from you which you never minded giving.
He texted you at around three in the afternoon, proposing his next plan for today’s date.
��Let’s go out for drinks tonight, it’s all on me ;)’
You liked his message, replying that you’ll be there and put a series of hearts at the end. Speaking of hearts, yours is fluttering at high altitudes from the way you can’t stop thinking about your “boyfriend” Changbin. This has been better than anything you could’ve expected, you never want this week to come to an end. It’s only been three days but you’ve begun to grow feelings for him, they weren’t too strong just yet but they were most definitely there. You couldn’t let that halt you from having a good time tonight, you’ll have to accept it soon enough he’s not your actual boyfriend. He’s doing this because you paid him to, if it wasn’t for your money he wouldn’t be here right now.
‘This relationship is purely transactional’ you unfortunately keep reminding yourself of the reality you’re in. Psyching yourself out of this sudden somber mood that’s consuming you, distracting your pessimism by raiding your closet for some cute clothes to wear tonight’s date. After what seemed like hours of tearing your entire room apart, you decide to settle on this sparkly black mini tube dress, pairing it with a leather jacket and more platform shoes because you’re obsessed with feeling tall. Once it’s 7 PM you head out to the bar you’re seeing Changbin at, he was already waiting for you inside the place. Eyes instantly lighting up when he sees you coming towards him, just like he always does he motions for a hug, pulling you in tightly like he hasn’t seen you in years.
His hugs felt so cozy, like sitting in front of the fireplace on a crisp, snowy winter’s evening. You never wanted to escape the warmth of his arms, it was one of those forms of physical touch that felt so overly personal to you. The thought of him hugging someone the same way he hugs you slightly enrages something in your spirit but again, it isn’t your place to get genuinely upset over him doing his job. You’re not entitled to him exclusively, but you feel like if you keep this up feelings will only continue to develop. This wasn’t something you considered when going into this and now you feel like you’ve just made a huge mistake.
“You okay babe?” Changbin notices you acting a bit strange, choosing not to pursue it after telling him you’re fine. He knows something’s wrong but doesn’t want to mess up the flow of the date, instead he orders a drink for the both of you and switches on to a lighter subject. “Let’s go shopping tomorrow at that new centre that just opened last week. I need to buy some new AirPods, I accidentally lost one of them in a taxi..”
“Sure,” you nod at his suggestion, in desperate need of some new clothes anyway. “Sorry about your AirPods, that sucks!”
He takes a sip of his bubbly drink that’s now on the table, “Eh, it’s okay this is probably the fourth time this has happened so far.” This has pretty much become a regular occurrence for him by now.
As the date progresses, things continue getting better. You’re both laughing, engaging in much deeper conversation than ever before. You definitely had more than enough alcohol in your system by now, feeling congested and claustrophobic as more people came into the bar. Changbin takes note of your discomfort and asks if you want to get some fresh air outside, you wasted absolutely no time to agree.
While you two were outside continuing your chat about some wild conspiracy he read about online, Changbin’s attention was soon drawn to a different building nearby. Gazing up in confusion at his sudden outburst of excitement, you wonder where he could be leading you next.
“Noraebang!” He shouts loud enough anyone miles away could’ve heard that, he’s now grabbing your hand to frantically drag you along with him.
You were never one to carry a tune but Changbin was actually very good at karaoke and singing in general, he had such a lovely voice. You could seriously listen to him sing all night— which you basically did since you kept begging for an encore until it hit 4 am. That’s when you both decided to finally call it a night, you wanted to pay for the Uber since he’s paid for all the drinks and every other expenses for today. You felt bad because you were the one renting him to be your boyfriend yet he’s constantly shelling out money left and right. He still insisted on paying and ultimately won the whole debacle, making you swallow your pride and get into the Uber with him. Changbin’s definitely not just someone you’re going to forget about after this week is over. You dread the day this all comes to an end, wishing there was a way to relive these moments again and again.
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“I’m a little under the weather today, sorry I can’t make it Binnie.” Your voice is hoarse from coughing and unbearable throat pain. You’ve already consumed half a bag of cough drops, throat lozenges, and random cold medicine you’ve found in your cabinets.
He sounds mildly disappointed, but springs back up with a new proposal, “I can come over and bring some soup if you’d like!”
You appreciate his gesture but still refuse, you know he’s only saying all this because he has to, not because he wants to. “N-no you don’t have to, I’m sure you can go see other clients today. One less person to worry about right?”
The call went silent for a minute, he wasn’t quite sure how to respond to such a deprecating comment.
“I don’t want to see other clients, I want to see you ___.” He sighs, unwilling to give up so easily, “I’ll be at your place soon, m’kay?” He hangs up before you could even respond or say no again.
You had no choice but to wait for Changbin to show up now. Before you got sick, the last two dates you went on were debatably the best so far. You had gone out shopping together, accidentally wearing almost the same kind of outfit. Changbin was wearing a white graphic tee with blue baggy jeans and you wore something practically identical. The two of you looked like a real, official couple and people would stare as you walked hand in hand, it really did seem like the perfect relationship on the outside.
You got even closer when he came over the following day, resulting in you two cuddling while watching movies and baking cookies. He’s expressed that he’s never been to another client’s home before but it wasn’t “technically” against any rules. The more you kept hanging out together, the harder it was coming to terms with the fact you’re actually falling for Changbin. He made every experience with you more exciting than the last, which he did exactly that night. When the cookies were done you fed a piece to him, making little airplane sounds as you do it, he eagerly takes a bite of the chewy treat and compliments both your efforts.
“These taste way better than I thought, oh my god they literally melt in your mouth. Try it!” He takes another cookie from the tray and feeds it to you this time.
There was something so overly domestic about that moment you couldn’t shake the feelings of wanting to kiss him right then and there. But you can’t. If you did such a thing you’d never be allowed to see him again, plus you don’t want to be known as that one creepy client who just couldn’t keep their hands to themselves. As you were cuddling on the couch though, things may have taken a turn for the better… or worse?
Changbin would “yawn” at the movie and subtly wrap his arm around you, he’d subconsciously pull you in closer and it didn’t make it any better that you were under the same blanket. You weren’t complaining at any of this though, you were pretty much in heaven. It took everything in you not to look up and stare, gluing your eyes to the movie that was displayed on the TV. But as the night progressed you were practically snuggling up with him like he was your real boyfriend. The way he’d run his fingers gently down your back, soothing you in a way that could lull you asleep. His touch was the most relaxing thing ever, you were so calm with him and loved how he brought a side of you that’s never been shown. After this encounter you can no longer deny the way you feel— you are officially falling deeply in love your rental boyfriend, Seo Changbin.
The sound of your doorbell ringing alarms you of a new visitor, who was none other than your “boyfriend” waiting patiently outside the door for you. You feel and look like death itself, coming downstairs to answer the door still in your PJ’s and hair a disheveled mess. Every five seconds was interrupted with you coughing your lungs out, barely able to speak above a whisper. Changbin looks thrilled as ever to see you, even when you clearly don’t look your best he’s still coming up to hug you tightly. His hugs are always blocking off your airways from the way his muscles squeeze you, it’s even worse when you’re sick— practically gasping for air.
“Sorry babyy, I just missed you so much. I couldn’t stop thinking about you all day and soon as you said you’re sick I dropped everything to go make you this soup. It’s a specialty I make whenever my friends are sick, the perfect remedy to cure my princess.” He goes into your kitchen to heat up the soup in your microwave, making you wait patiently on the couch as you’re wrapped up in multiple blankets.
Your body feels like it’s -2 degrees, you were freezing. The crazy thing is your thermostat was set to 80 degrees, it was definitely you that was the problem. He propped your feet up on the table, rested a tray in your lap and set the bowl of soup on top. Brushing a couple strands of hair out your face he looks at you intently, examining your symptoms as if he’s a doctor.
“It’ll be okay soon love, I’m here to nurse you back to health again. Can’t see my pretty baby sick like this, makes me all sad.” He pouts, giving you a soft head pat like you’re a delicate kitten.
He takes a spoonful of the hot soup, slightly blowing on it before telling you to open up so you can eat. You don’t know what’s gotten into you but you feel like he’s gone too far with all this. It’s not fair for you to continue on if it’s just become torture now. He’s practically dangling in your face that you’ll never have a partner as perfect as him in your life.
“I- I can’t do this anymore Changbin..” you say lowly, refusing to eat the soup he made.
“What do you mean? I’m just feeding you soup, it’s my duty as your boyfriend to-”
“This isn’t real… none of it is. I’m stupid for even doing this but I was lonely.. I’m sorry but I’d prefer something that isn’t temporary.” You cut him off to express your pent up frustrations, ready to be let down and rejected by him as gently as possible.
“Then let’s make it real,” he proposes without any hesitation, “honestly I stopped faking it around our third date, it was all me after that. I never said anything because well… this is my job and I’ve never fallen for a client before so this is still all very new to me..”
You’d be screaming right now if you weren’t sick, instead you’re internally freaking out at this confession, it feels like your hearts doing cartwheels and somersaults.
“Seriously?” Eyes widening as you look at him, suddenly your body heat rises and you know it’s not because of the soup or the layers of blankets that’s covering you.
He nods, “I thought it was kinda obvious when we kissed yesterday..”
Oh yeah… you forgot that did happen. You thought it was another fever dream you might’ve just made up in your head. You shared your first kiss with someone you deemed so special and important to you, someone you never would’ve guessed could come into your life and shift the entirety of your world like magic. There was no one else in existence you wanted more than Changbin.
“Doesn’t that mean you’ll have to quit your job? I don’t want to be the reason you stop making such good income.. I’ll feel so bad.” You knew deep down you didn’t feel that badly about him quitting to date you instead. It was just the thought of him leaving something he’s been doing for years behind all for some girl he’s known for simply a week.
He shrugs at your comment, “I’ll be just fine, I was planning on finding a new job soon anyway. It gets kinda old after a while, I felt like I was on autopilot most of the time. You were able to get me to open up and show my true self, I could never thank you enough for that ___.” Changbin couldn’t resist the urge to plant a kiss to your forehead.
After everything that’s been said and done. What you’ve come to understand is that love is learned, a development that takes time to grow and blossom into something extraordinary. Just like learning a new language or a musical instrument, we learn love from society and cultures we’re raised in, it’s a beautiful thing once we know how to cherish it. Your newfound romance with Changbin is something you’ll learn to cherish forever and ever.
[End <3].
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russellsppttemplates · 8 months ago
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I want this every day (Charles Leclerc)
Charles has been frustrated with the team's strategies and the results he's been getting lately so you find a way to cheer him up
Note: english is not my first language. I was going to write it earlier on the week, but then I felt like I a jinxing it so I stopped... but after today, I think it's a good place to start...
Thank you so much to everyone who likes and reblogs, your feedback is appreciated 🤍 and I'm taking requests so if you have any ideas or concepts you want to share, feel free to do so as I'll try to get to them the best I can!
my masterlist
Tw: mentions Jules Bianchi
Tag list: @myloverjk-blog @hiireadstuff @c-losur3
Another race weekend where he was out qualified by his team-mate left Charles with the feeling that if it came to it, he was almost one hundred percent sure they would ask them to swap positions.
Points for the team would be important anyway and they came away with a good amount and the car showed to be competitive enough considering the RedBull dominance on the grid, but the frustration was still there.
With the team and with himself.
They told him they'd keep him - there wasn't a quesion put down about his contract -, Il Predestinato wasn't something he carried lightly but often times it was confusing. Without the support and appreciation from inside the team, it was proving difficult to achieve their goals.
His childhood dream was driving for Ferrari and Suzuka always carried a heavier weight for him. As he took off his helmet and was faced with the number 17 on the side, he apoligised. To Jules, who he wanted to make proud every day but even more on this particular track. To his fans, who deserved better than this. To you, who were there for him, arms open for a hug and a shoulder where he could cry and let his feelings out on, to hold him and remind him every single time that all of the nonsense commentators and the media still had the audacity to say about him despite his continous shows of intelligence, skill and talent, and to love him.
The way you loved him was something he had never felt before and had never thought he deserved.
The face you were giving everyone in the garage that dared look at you wasn't unfortunately a rare occurrence, hence the fact that so very few team members approached you, "Charles is just finishing his interviews, he should be here soon", Silvia said before excusing herself from the garage.
You walked to your boyfriend's driver room, knowing he would end up in there soon enough after greeting the mechanics and engineers.
He stepped inside the room less than fifteen minutes later, finding your embrace immediately as his arms wrapped around your waist, "it's not fair that this keeps happening", he mumbled.
"I know it isn't", you kissed his stubbly cheek while rubbing his back soothingly.
"I thought I could've done so much better, for the fans, for you, for Jules", he hiccuped, letting himself be vulnerable after bottling up everything he was feeling.
"You did us proud, Charles - he is always so proud of you", you cupped hisface in your hands as you hoped the words got through to him, "okay?".
The flight back home had Charles sleeping most of the time, the whole rush of the weekend catching up with his body as he slept with his head on your thighs, your fingers playing with his locks while you arranged your schedule for the week ahead.
"I was thinking we could spend some time together today", you said over the phone, hoping he hadn't booked anything since you made sure that Andrea and Joris had cleared his schedule so you could make this happen without a hitch.
"You don't have work?", Charles asked, "no, I arranged a few things and a meeting got cancelled", you explained.
"Good, I don't have anything to do either, I was just going to stay home, but being with you sounds much nicer, my place or your place?", he wondered.
"My place, please", you replied immediately, "I just want to change my clothes and I'm feeling like spending the afternoon in", you tried, hoping he would catch on and not mess up your surprise.
"Okay, amour! Do you need me to pick you up from work?", Charles asked and you heard a small smile on his face. You weren't sure why, but Charles really got a kick out of dropping you off and picking you up from work, so you felt bad for the answer you were giving him, "it's okay, you can meet me there, I'm already walking", you said as you drove out of the shop and headed home. It was an inoffensive lie but you kept telling yourself it was for a greater good.
"Okay, I'll meet you there in twenty minutes or so", he said, "Je t'aime, mon amour".
Riccardo seemed to have parked the car at the front of your building, making you get the bag out of your car trunk and join him and his family, "hey guys! Thank you for coming to this", you smiled, touching Chiara's foot softly and getting a giggle out of the little girl.
"No worries, this is such a nice idea and we're happy to help!", Marta said, letting you walk up to the door so you could get to your apartment.
"For the first time in my life, I'm the first one somewhere, and then they showed up too!", Joris said as the rest of the group you invited stood up from the hallway floor.
"I'm sorry for making you wait, but I had to pick these up and then the call with Charles had to be done at the precise time so he wouldn't get here before I did!", you explained, unlocking the door and letting them in.
"So we're fine to wait, but Charles can't wait for you?", Joris teased, making kissing noises as you shook your head, "privileges of being my boyfriend - it is what it is!", you chuckled.
Delegating the small tasks you left for the last minute, Charles' text saying he had just parked the car was enough to capture you attention, "quick quick, go hide in the living room - careful with the board game boxes! He's coming up!", you ushered your friends to the living room before your boyfriend knocked on your door.
"Hello, my love", you said, kissing his lips and pulling him inside the supposedly quiet apartment.
"Hey, gorgeous girl - I missed you", he squeezed you tight once you closed the door, "I was getting in my he - what's that?", Charles asked as a noise came from the living room.
Chiara squealed loudly enough for him to hear, so in part your surprise was not such a surprise, "you're not alone?", he mused.
Lacing your hand in his, you pulled him to the living room as everyone jumped out of their places to greet him!
"Surprise - ish!", you waved your hands as if you were announcing some great show, "I gathered all your favourite people - Lorenzo is coming with Charlotte in a bit, he just picked her up from work and your mother also had a cliente so she'll arrive a little later. Arthur is in the bathroom?", you wondered as you saw him walk out and pat his brother's back, not missing the truly surprised look on his face as he pulled you closer to him, kissing your temple, "you're the best, amour, thank you", he whispered.
You had food laid out in the coffee table and drinks in the kitchen where everybody could serve themselves so you could have your dining table available for the board and card games you were playing along with some building blocks for Chiara who was immediately stolen from her parents once your boyfriend saw her.
"Do we want to make a castle? Or maybe a rollercoaster?", Charles mused with the little girl sitting on his lap, still keeping an eye on his Monopoly game to make sure no one was missing any of the payments on his properties, "Good job, chérie!", he congratulated her, kissing her chubby cheek.
"Do you want me to get you guys anything? I'm already going to the kitchen", you wondered, "can you fill this up for us, please?", Marta asked as she handed you the orange juice jug, "yes, of course!", you grabbed it.
"This was a great idea, Y/N", Lorenzo said whole he poured himself a drink as you stepped into the kitchen, "he's been in his head a lot recently", he began.
"It's not much, really, it was quite easy to put everything together and you being here was very kind", you brushed it off.
"Y/N, gathering his favourite people to do something he loves apart from racing may seem simple but it's what he needs right now - don't underestimate yourself or the ability you have to bring him back to a good mental space", he rubbed your shoulder before going back to open the door, "it's our mother", he excused himself.
You set the jug on the table and took Chiara from your boyfriend's arms, volunteering to change her nappy in your bedroom.
Charles hugged his mother tight, "Hello, mon petit", she cupped his face and kissed his cheek, "I'm not little anymore", Charles blushed, "you and your brothers will always be my little boys, I don't care how old or how tall you get", she smiled, greeting everyone else in the room.
His favourite people were all in the same place, Charles thought. Some were playing cards, some were just chatting and you just picked his friends' daughter to change her nappy like she was your own.
"Do you have room for one more? I'm usually pretty good at this!", Lorenzo said as he sat at the dining table, "you take my game - it's not too bad, just make sure Marta pays up what she owes me - two hotels in my blue cards", Charles raised his eyebrows, "I know you were counting on your daughter's cuteness to distract me, but I have excellent vision", he smirked.
Charles walked to your bedroom, seeing you close the diaper bag as Chiara kicked the air, layed on top of your comforter and giggling at the story you were telling her, "and then I had to tell the lady 'that won't do, because I have my boyfriend's family and our friends over for dinner and I can't have too little food! Even if I have left overs for weeks!' because that's what's right, right? She also had this very fluffy bread that was still warm from the oven so I asked her if she could add that because I knew you'd like it - bread is the best, isn't it, cutie?", you spoke.
You were it, he had known that for a long time.
You were the one he wanted to grow old with and go through every challenge life wanted to throw at you, because he knew you both could face them if you were there.
"And who is that spying on us, hm? It's Charles! Let's go and give Charles a big hug and many kisses!", you smiled, picking her up and approaching your boyfriend, cuddling into his chest as you kept the little girl on your arms, kissing his chest while Chiara palmed his face and giggled when Charles pretended to eat her fingers, "yummy fingers, nom, nom, nom".
"I need to get started on dinner - I'm doing that roast you really like", you offered, "I already prepped most of it, just need to cut up the veggies and then put in the oven, simple as that".
"C'mon, Chiara - I bet my mother is wondering where you are because she'll want a cuddle", Charles took her from your arms, "I'll be back for you", Charles slapped your butt playfully.
You were seasoning the food on the trays, making sure you weren't forgetting anything when your boyfriend walked up to join you, wrapping his arms around your waist, "thank you for this, I really needed it", he kissed under your ear, turning you around to face him and kissing your lips properly, "it's fine", you scoffed.
"No, I really needed it - it's easy to lose sight of these things and these moments", he began, "I was home and getting way too much into my own head and I wouldn't got to anyone unless they asked about it", he admitted, squeezing your body closer to his.
"I'm glad you liked it, it's truly nothing but I'm glad you're happy", you smiled, "I can't control what goes on your mind all the time but I'm going to make sure that whenever you're near me and say silly things about doubting yourself, I will always help you see the truth and work it out with you - no down talking about yourself when you're with me, understood?", you stated firmly almost like you were lecturing him.
"I know, amour", he giggled, kissing your forehead and then littering some more kisses on your face and making you break out in laughter loudly.
The dinner was great and everyone seemed to enjoy themselves as they ate the meal and spoke about whatever came to mind, summer plans already in discussion.
Charles was helping you put away the plates when he decided he would voice the thoughts running through his head. Usually at this time of the day he was already knee deep into strategies and failed attempts, but this time was different.
"I want this every day", Charles said with a big smile on his face.
"Well, not all of us have your schedule, it would be lovely, but maybe making it a weekly thing? Monthly maybe with your schedule?", you tried, not wanting to kick his idea straight to the trash.
"I don't mean that - I've been thinking about this a lot lately, and I was wondering if you'd like to move in with me", Charles clarified, "there's no point to keep two places when realistically, we spend most times at eachother's place - you're down to what? Sleeping two nights here per week?", he noted as you smiled.
"You want to move in together?", you checked and he nodded, "yes, I do - honestly, I've thinking we keep my place since you're renting here and that way you'd be closer to work, too", he suggested.
"Sounds good to me", you smiled, kissing his lips, sealing the deal.
"I don't want to be far away from you when we don't have to be, and this way you can save on rent, too!", he added and before you truly lectured him, he caught you ahead, "I know you won't let me pay for things on my own and we will find some arrangement for that, I was just saying you won't have to keep paying your landlord", he smiled.
"I mean it when I say I want to split expenses, okay?", you argued, "unless you start going with expensive caviar or any of that crazy expensive stuff - my salary can't take that", you joked.
"When have you ever seen that in my fridge?", he threw his head back as he laughed.
"I'm only joking, handsome - I can't wait to move in with you", you hugged him, "I love you, Charles, can't wait to be your new roomie".
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leafofkudzu · 4 months ago
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Greetings and salutations from a summer in full swing, everyone! I hope the season is treating you well, because the first Saturday of a new month is this Saturday, and the festival gods have blessed us with the perfect venue for yet another art party hosted by my guild, [VS] Verdant Shield! That's right, finally the cards have aligned for us to visit one of my favorite locations in game - the Labyrinthine Cliffs!
For those who aren’t familiar with art parties, they’re a concept carried over from Final Fantasy XIV - in-game get-togethers for artists/writers/creatives of all types to hang out, chat, and create together! Get your favorite character/look together, head to the location, find someone that catches your eye, and create! Afterwards, everyone posts their creations in a shared tag (ours is #VSArtParty) so others can see, interact, and share! Tl;dr: the ‘goal’ of an art party isn’t to be drawn, but to draw others, and share with the community!
Time and /squadjoin information is under the cut, but will also be posted again via reblogs as the squads go up on the day of the party!
Location Information:
No picture needed because the Labyrinthine Cliffs are unforgettable! When the Festival of the Four Winds started on Tuesday everyone should have got an invitation to the festival grounds, and if you didn't you likely have an old one lying around, or can find a portal to the locations from just about any major location you can think of! Head to the Cliffs and look for my tag down by the water - there's a good chance I'll be on the NPC boat that cruises around, or lounging on the beach awaiting the next treasure hunt with everyone!
Time & Squad Details:
As we always do, we’ll be having two parties - one on EU servers and one on NA ones - with an hour break in between. People tend to arrive early and/or jump between accounts as soon as the break comes up, so don’t be surprised to see tags and announcements going up ahead of schedule!
The first party will be on EU servers and begin at 9pm Central European Summer Time (aka 3pm Eastern Daylight Time or 5 hours before in-game reset). I’ll be hosting on my EU alt account, so to join either /squadjoin or whisper Ashelin Falstaff for an invite.
The second party will be on NA servers and begin at 7pm Eastern Daylight Time (aka 1am Central European Summer Time or an hour before in-game reset). I’ll be hosting this one on my main account and may swap characters a few times, but a safe bet is to either /squadjoin or whisper Teekzi for an invite - just don't be surprised if you get a response from a different character name!
Closing Words:
As is clearly evidenced by this post being in the right format, I did mostly cobble my computer back together after last month's implosion! I wanted to wait until the Festival was announced in order to confirm that it would be active for this month, and then IRL got in the way again (but in a pleasant way this time don't worry), so I'm a smidge delayed. But we got there! Thank you for rolling with my weird Situations these past few months - hosting these events is a joy I will continue to prioritize as long as you all continue to come by and make them awesome! Keep being kind to each other, and I'll see you all on Saturday! ♥
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starrayblogs · 11 months ago
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Not So Rock-Hearted || Floyd (Trolls) x Reader
a/n: MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE! or happy holidays~ i hope you all had a wonderful day, and i hope this new chapter is a fun read! likes/reblogs are appreciated, and asks are welcomed c:
tags: @brights-place
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✩ previous chapter
v. Keep on Watching
It’s the day of the Secret Holiday Gift Swap.
And you’re panicking.
“Barb!” You barge into the longue room and watch as the mentioned troll shouts, jumps, and drops her invitation. 
“What the- I know I told you you’re welcome anytime, but you can knock-” She tuts when she recognizes that it’s you, bending to pick up her card again.
“I got him!” You pop up in front of her, grabbing her by the shoulders and stopping her from picking up her card again.
“Who’s ‘him’?” Barb raises a brow, leaning her head away and tucking her chin to further emphasize her confusion.
You let her go with furrowed brows and a dreaded look in your eyes. “I got Floyd!” You say, out of breath, like you’ve just sang your heart out.
“Wait, what’s wrong with that?” Barb places a hand on her hip, finally having the opportunity to pick up her invitation.
“Uh- what isn’t wrong with that?” You extend your arms and shake your head in quick, short motions. “I’m already having a hard time confronting my feelings for him, now I have to think about him even more!” You exclaim, letting your weight fall on your butt and your back against the couch. 
Barb laughs, taking her seat next to you with her knee up. “Man, I would have never assumed you’d be a softie underneath all that edge. Then again, that’s any of us actually…” She trails off a bit before letting out an amused sigh, turning her head to you. “Seriously though, don’t complicate things too much.” She shrugs.
“Easy for you to say, who did you get?” You cock your head in her direction, watching her open her card.
“I got…” You hum, watching her pull out the name. “Aww, cool, I got Riff! I totally know what to get ‘im.” She smirks confidently, tucking the piece of paper back in the pocket of the card. 
“Good for you,” you quip quickly before catching her attention. “But what do I get Floyd?” You ask worriedly.
“Uhh… Well, what do you think he’s like?” Barb asks. You look ahead of you, thinking back to him.
“He’s… kind. Very kind, it’s like his whole charm. He’s sweet too, like cotton candy. And he’s reeeaaally cool, I mean come on! The hair was one thing, but spending the weekend with him… When he sang, I immediately got hooked on his voice.” You inhale deeply. “It’s gentle. Like the way he speaks to me, it’s like he cares about me…”
“Maybe because he does.”
You swiftly turn your head to Barb with a deadpan look, who raises her hands up in defense before motioning for you to go on.
“Ugh, he’s just! So…!” You plop your head down on the couch behind you, reaching for a pillow behind you and plopping it on your face.
“So… from all that, what do you think is the best gift for him?” She asks again, but you sigh. You remove the pillow from your face and glance at her. “Hey, you’ve got three days to think about it. I’m sure you’ll come up with something…” She reassures you, patting your shoulder.
And you did, but you weren’t confident with it.
You clear the cough in your throat as you hop off your bike, adjusting your guitar strap. You look ahead to Pop Village, seeing all the other trolls and their gifts. “What if you just handed the gift to Floyd and told him I got sick?” You rapped to Barb, holding your gift nervously.
“Dude.” She looks at you with a ‘seriously?’ face. “No. Poppy always said, it’s the thought that counts when it comes to gifts.” She pokes a finger to your chest. “And every rock troll knows how much you thought about this gift.”
Your cheeks warm up a little, and you let out a long sigh. “You’re right, you’re right.” You hop a bit on your feet, telling yourself to relax a bit. You look at the colorful light bulbs hanging across the entire village, lighting up the night, and smile a little.
“Come on, the gift swap’s about to start.” Barb starts walking with her gift in hand, and you follow her to a big stage where Poppy and Branch stand atop it.
“Welcome to our second Trolls Kingdom Secret Holiday Gift Swap! I’m so glad to have you all here again, and with some new faces this time.” Poppy grins, pointing in the crowd and having a light shine down on the pointed area. You see that it’s Viva, her Putt Putt Trolls (which she told you about), and Brozone all condensed in one area. 
The crowd welcomes them with a cheer, but you find your eyes on that pink-haired troll. You chuckle when you notice the piercing in his ear turned into a snowflake to match the holiday. You turn away and look at his gift in your hands, frowning a bit. You look up when Barb speaks.
“You’ve got this.” Her hand moves to pat the place where your heart would be. “Time to let someone new in this, ya know?” She chuckles and you do the same, following it with a whiney ‘yuck’.
“That’s the sappiest thing you’ve ever said.” You comment, and she shivers.
“Yeah, I think Poppy’s rubbing off on me.” Barb shakes her hair as if there was dirt on her. “But, you know what I mean.” She smirks, nudging your shoulder.
“Now, who’s ready to gift-swap!?” Poppy announces and fireworks shoot up into the sky. “Reveal your secret troll!” She hypes, and the crowd starts moving to find the person they got (who was scrapbooked on the invitation, conveniently).
Barb waves you goodbye to find Riff, which you return until she’s eventually lost in the crowd. You look to where Floyd was previously, but can’t get a glimpse of him from everyone running around. You frown, beginning to aimlessly walk around the crowd to find him until someone lifts you up in a hug.
“Amiga!” You let out a sigh of relief when you realize it’s Viva. When you’re let down, you turn around and return a quick hug.
“Happy holidays, Veev!” You greet and she giggles, still holding her gift. “Who’s the special troll?”
“Barb! The one you always hang out with, have you seen her?” She tilts her head, pursing her lips. 
“Got separated, but I hope you find her. I don’t think you’d miss that bright red mohawk anytime.” You snicker to yourself. “I like your clothes.” You comment on her white leotard with red trimmings and her matching red-and-white striped leg warmers. 
“Aww, thank you, you too-” she’s cut off with a gasp when she does a double take on your hair. “Did you..?” 
“Yeah…” You run a hand through your hair nervously. “Does it look fine?”
“Fine? Fine doesn’t even cut it, you look amazing!” Viva squeals, looking up at your newly two-toned hair. “Guess I don’t have to guess who you got, hm?” She smirks, raising her brows teasingly.
“Yeah…” You smirk eases into a smile. “Have you seen him?”
“Oh, I got separated from him too…” Viva frowns, which causes you to do the same. “But, I have no doubt you’ll find him!” She recovers, jumping on her toes excitedly. “I have a hunch that this holiday is gonna end up so well~” She sings.
“Can’t hide it from you either?” You raise a brow, tilting your head embarrassingly. 
“I’m your childhood best friend, what is it you can hide from me?” Viva smirks, punching you in the shoulder. “I was the one who came up with the idea to put you two together for the morning last weekend.” Your jaw drops, pointing a finger at her.
“That was your doing?” She giggles and winks, turning her back to you and running off with a jolly ‘see ya!’. “Viva, we’re talking about this later!” You yell into the crowd, hoping she hears that.
Your cheeks flush again as you grumble your way to Branch’s bunker, hoping to wait for the crowd to die down and you’d eventually spot Floyd. You hold his gift gently in your hands, maneuvering through the others who are either still finding their troll or are celebrating with their gifts already.
Once you make it out of the cramped area, you walk slowly to the bunker. You kept your eyes on your gift, overthinking if it was good enough to give to him. Then you hear your name.
You hear your name in his voice.
You turn around and see him emerging from the crowd, holding his gift. “Floyd.” You say, out of breath. Your eyes flutter as you watch him walk closer to you. Both of you are now far away from the noise, just the two of you right outside Branch’s house. Just like how you arrived.
He opens his mouth, but then he notices how you look tonight. You’re still dressed in your usual fashion, but for colder weather. Then his eyes met your hair.
“Oh…” His cheeks darken slightly as he sees what you’ve done to your hair. Instead of the highlight in your hair being your favorite color, you dyed it white in the meantime. Your hair matched his. “Your hair…”
“Yeah… I figured I could rock the look, ya know?” You chuckle, trying to keep up your cool image. When he doesn’t laugh with you, your brows furrow, and you frown as you try to meet his eyes. “Do you… not like it?”
“You look great.” He meets your eyes with a wide smile, and, for the first time, you see both of his eyes. “I like that we’re matching.” He follows up with a soft chuckle.
He’s beautiful.
Your frown slowly lifts into a smile as you laugh softly. “Now we’re both cotton candy.” You joke, and he laughs with you this time. There’s a small pause between you two after it dies until he speaks up.
“I’ve been looking for you.” He smiles at you. Your cheeks warm up again, and your shoulders straighten.
“You were?” You repeat, and he nods. He holds out the gift in his hands toward you. Your eyes widen, and you nearly drop your gift for him in shock. “You got me..?” You look back up at him in disbelief.
“Happy holidays.” He simply says with that stupidly charming smile of his. “I hope you like what I got you.” He nudges the box into your hands, and you reluctantly take it after propping his gift against the wall. 
“If it’s from you, Cotton Candy, I’ll enjoy it.” You chuckle. There’s truth in your words, but you were still putting up walls. You unwrap it and reveal a box. You lift up the top and mutter a soft ‘no way’, tossing the cover to the ground. 
Inside was a guitar strap. You gently take it out and set the box on the ground, letting the strap unfurl to its full length to see its design. It’s a simple black strap, but it’s stitched with several symbols related to rock in your favorite color. You don’t notice how wide your smile has gotten, and it only gets wider when you notice the stitched shape of cotton candy on a cone.
“Do you like it?” Floyd asks, bringing your attention back to him.
“I love it.” You reply, holding it close to your chest. You take off your electric guitar carefully, detaching your old guitar strap for your new one. “I’ll wear it forever. Thank you, Cotton Candy.” You laugh softly, placing your old one in the mess of your hair and wearing your guitar again.
He smiles, watching you adjust the guitar to your back again. “So who’d you get?” He tilts his head a bit, and you inhale sharply as your smile drops.
“Oh, funny you ask,” you chuckle nervously, reaching back for his gift again. “I got… Uh, I got you.” You hold out the present to him, looking away with downturned ears and darkened cheeks. “I hope you like it.”
His eyes widen in genuine surprise. His hands slowly rise to take the gift in your hand, trying to guess what the present could be as he turns it around. “I wasn’t sure what you wanted, and I was worried the whole time, wondering if this would make you happy.” You explain, watching him carefully tear the wrapping. “Then, I figured that if you don’t like it, I would dye my hair to match yours to make you happy… If you thought I would look funny or, I don’t know.” You fiddle with your (new) guitar strap.
He stops just as he was about to open the box at your words with a furrowed gaze. “Why would I think you’d look funny?” He asks, upset. 
You open your mouth to explain, but no words come out. You shrug your shoulders.
“I would never laugh at your appearance,” Floyd says, stepping closer to you. “I like how you look. I like that you thought about me enough to go as far as dying your hair.” He lets out a small laugh. “You keep getting cooler to me.”
If steam could come out of your ears, you wouldn’t be able to hide how much his words made you feel. Your chest is light again, and your heart is tugging in his direction. Your lips managed to turn into a smile. How can he keep doing that?
He returns to the gift, taking off the cover. “Woah.” He murmurs as he pulls out the gift from the box. You fiddle more with your guitar strap as you wait for more of his reaction.
You got him a rouge-colored acoustic guitar. The sides, fretboard, and soundhole were trimmed white to match. Most importantly, the fretboard was in the shape of a cotton candy swirl and colored both rouge and white. You worked on that guitar for the last two days, getting as much help as you could, but you did most of the work.
“Do you like it..? I wasn’t sure if you could play instruments, and you seemed like a guitar-type guy, so I could teach you-” You began to ramble worriedly until you were interrupted by a few notes played.
You watch him play the guitar smoothly before he stops with a smile, followed by the brightest laugh. “Thank you!” He says, his eyes turned into crescents. “It’s been a while since I’ve played. This is amazing,” he says your name and your worries fly away.
You smile sheepishly, running a hand through your hair for a moment. “I’m glad you enjoy it.”
“I love it.” He corrects you, just like you did. You share another laugh together. 
You hold your gifts to each other gently. His hands are careful with the guitar, and your thumb is carefully stroking the stitched pattern of cotton candy on the guitar strap. 
You’re so focused on his smile as he looks at you that you didn’t even process what he said when you saw his lips move. “What did you say?” You blink your eyes, telling yourself mentally to get it together.
“I asked if you’d like to spend the holiday together. It’s the weekend, right?” He tilts his head with a smile.
“Just the two of us?” You ask, dipping your head but keeping your eyes on him.
“If you’re only okay with it.” He quickly replies, his brows raising with his smile growing sheepish. “I was hoping we could play some songs together.” He chuckles, mostly to himself, but your head rises with a smirk.
“Is this some trap to hear me play again?” You chuckle. He hums, shrugging his shoulders innocently.
“I don’t know what makes you say that.” You laugh a bit harder, and his eyes soften.
You aren’t as scary as he thought you were the first time he saw you. He was taken aback by you’re casual compliment about his hair at the cantina, his heart thumping a bit faster from surprise. When he met you again, he thought you were cool and confident, finding himself interested in you. Then you left your guitar behind, and he took up the responsibility to take care of it until the next morning. When he saw your edgy exterior drop when he gave you back the guitar, something tugged at his heart again. 
And it’s tugging at him again, telling him to find out more about you.
“Come on, I recently got my own pod. We can jam out there.” Floyd suggests, and you nod your head as your laugh dies down.
“Ohh, trying to get a VIP rock show, are you now?” You snicker.
“Stop revealing my plans.” Floyd points a finger at you, trying to contain his own laughs by turning around and leading the way.
You breathe deeply as your face settles in a grin. That felt nice. He makes you feel so nice, and you remember Barb’s words. Your grin drops to a hesitant, small smile as you watch him walk. You think for a moment, wondering if you should just take the leap and grasp that happiness right in front of you.
“Are you coming?” Floyd stops and turns around to find you still standing. You blink and fiddle with your strap again, but you make up your mind. Your smile settles softly as you begin to walk up to him.
“Yeah.”
You two walk away together, making small talk on the way to Floyd’s house. You two walk away, unaware of the crowd watching you.
“Are they gone?” One of them whispers from under the mushroom. 
Branch, who reveals himself by dropping his disguise (which was a fluff ball, with the help of his hair), steps out under the mushroom and looks in the direction you two walked off in too. “Clear.”
There’s a pair of squeals as everyone’s hair disguise reveals themselves underneath the mushroom. “We should’ve put a mistletoe on top of them!”
“Woah, too early, Poppy.” Bruce raises a hand with a light chuckle.
“My little rockstar is growing up.” Barb steps away from Poppy, pouting her lip with a hand to her chest. “It’s sickeningly sweet, but aww, but also eww…” She fake gags, which receives a friendly hit on the back from Poppy.
“They’re adorableee.” Viva coos, her hands pressed to her cheeks.
“If adorable, you mean Floyd can’t even recognize his own growing feelings.” Branch rolls his eyes as he crosses his arms.
“Like you were any better.” Poppy smirks, hand on her hip.
“I agree with boytoy over there, though.” Barb raises her arms and dips her head in surrender. “It’s all cute seeing them together, but I don’t think I’m emotionally prepared to be a possible confession dummy.” She contemplates, scratching her ear.
“How long do you think until they get together?” JD tilts his head with crossed arms.
“Oh, I think they’re just like this sad romance book I read where-” Clay starts rambling about his predictions, earning the approval of Poppy and Viva, with the others weirdly agreeing with him too.
✩ next chapter
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kalmiaphlox · 4 days ago
Text
Damn, this is what it feels like to be you?
AO3 Link / Masterlist
Part 1 / Part 3
Guide Me As You Do
Twisting his head up to rest his chin on her chest, Astarion smiles big and wide. Hircine is immediately suspicious, red eyes narrowed to slits, awaiting whatever he's about to say. “My love, can I play with my—yourself?” “Clarify.”
Pairing: Astarion x Named Female Tav (Hircine)
WC: 6.5k
Main Tags: Body Swap, Humor, Fluff, Smut, Body Worship, Guided Masturbation, Massages, Little Edging, and stretching because its good for the body.
A/N: Don't walk on people's back. it really isn't good for the spine.
A big thank you to @amoremagnificentbastard for your kind words on this chapter 🥰
Tag list: @zozoparsnips
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Maybe being alive is the worst thing someone can be. 
If Astarion never uses the toilet again, it will still be too soon. Ugh, he feels so dirty—tainted. 
Still stuck in Hircine’s body, still subject to her body's needs, he laments his state. 
He furiously scrubs his slim body down in the bath, leaving red marks where he might have been a touch too rough and maybe taking too long to thoroughly inspect the wonderful tits now attached to his chest. Any slight movement has them swaying and the way they squeeze and conform around every touch or surface has his core quivering for something. It's so strange, the need to be filled instead of to fill. He wants so badly to slide his fingers into this heat, to know the feeling of being inside himself like that, but Hircine might not like him doing that to her body. 
So, fondling his breasts will have to do for now. It's not easy turning Hircine into a whimpering mess that begs for his cock even on their best, most lustful days when she's so tired, so overworked, and then she said she isn't attracted to her own body which certainly puts a damper on getting hot and heavy. Sex might be off the table, and while it's unfortunate to not experience such a once in a lifetime opportunity, they will be just fine without. 
He'll take this chance instead to learn what feels good in Hircine’s body so he can apply that when—not if—they return back to themselves.
Newly refreshed, Astarion towels off, but a shocking sight catches his eye.
My—no, Hircine’s reflection!
How did he not even think of the opportunity mirrors provide now?!
Trotting up to the mirror, Astarion gapes in awe at having something shown back at him, even if it isn’t exactly what he wants to see. Hircine is so lucky that he loves this beautiful face, so staring at it in adoration for much too long is no skin off his back…
Oh, he can make those jokes.
His pretty drow wife stares back at him now. Her soft, light gray skin with those rosy undertones that makes his mouth water from how inviting it is, is lit wonderfully in the bathroom candlelight, and the shiny slate and silver streaked hair long, silky and… grabbable. He loves the way her head will bend back when he takes a fistful of those locks to plant a kiss upon her lips or to sink his fangs into the sensual curve of her neck. 
Lavender eyes with a gold ring around the pupils reflect back into his gaze, catching the light perfectly. He can’t believe he ever thought them strange, and now the glow that shines so bright in the dark is always something he searches for in their quiet moments of peace in bed or on the den couch. Lavender and gold, a much better combination than the maroon that infests nearly every corner of their lives. 
Her straight, high-born nose, and her lovely plump mouth, unfortunately stained with a plum colored lipstick. He understands why she hides her natural lip color under it, but Astarion wants nothing more than to see her ghostly pale lips at all times. 
Maybe one day.
Thinking of ghostly pale, he draws his fingers down the smooth skin of her neck until he meets the ridiculously plush swell of a breast, watching as it indents with his touch. Beautiful, truly. He cups the left breast, Belbol as he’s named such a gift, and then moves on to the right one, Iiyola, his treasure. The areolas and nipples are the same bone white of her lips, with the slightest flush of pink beneath the surface. Fuck, he loves sucking on these.
Looking down, Astarion considers, could I? Just for a moment, see how it feels for him to taste his own tits… Hircine does it for him when asked, so why can't he?
Good gods, is he horny. He shakes the thought from his mind, freeing himself from the lust that threatens to overtake him.
With a fluffy, cotton robe wrapped around his body, he returns to the bedroom, throwing open Hircine’s closet to dig out a pair of panties from a dresser that he slides on quickly. 
I would much rather be naked, but I'm trying to be respectful.
Hircine stands by the fireplace, running a finger along the marble mantle. She turns, quirking an eyebrow at his appearance. “Did you bathe?”
“Yes,” he says, tightlipped, wrapping his arms around himself for some comfort.
“Wha-What happened? I thought you only needed to pee?”
He claps his hands over his ears. “Don't talk about it! It was awful and everything is ruined!”
The whole ordeal was traumatic. Astarion very badly wants to return to his vampire self. Gods, the grass really isn't greener on the other side. 
Taking pity on him, though he can absolutely see the smile she's smothering, Hircine holds out her arms, beckoning him to her. Rushing to melt into her embrace, he's not surprised to find why she likes to be held by him so much, strong arms supporting his thin frame, easily resting her chin on the top of his head so he's swallowed in solace.
What he does not enjoy is the distinct lack of heartbeat from the chest he's resting his ear against, but Hircine, his perfect girl, she never complains about such things.
Hmm, what else is his perfect girl good at? 
Oh, he knows.
Twisting his head up to rest his chin on her chest, Astarion smiles big and wide. Hircine is immediately suspicious, red eyes narrowed to slits, awaiting whatever he's about to say. “My love, can I play with my—yourself?”
“Clarify.”
“You’re so bendy. I want to try it out, you know, like when you lay on the floor in the splits or touch your toes to your head.”
“Ah, I see. Go wild, Husband.”
He purrs into her chest, “I love when you call me ‘husband’ in my voice.”
“You are so weird, Husband,” she says as a kiss is pressed to his forehead, “Off you go. Be flexible or whatever.”
Letting out a girlish shriek that they are both alarmed by, Astarion slides the lounge chair against the wall to give himself some space before settling down cross legged on the rug. Maybe he’s getting ahead of himself, now at a loss for what to do next. “So, what do I do?”
Hircine chuckles, a nice deep rumble that he likes. “I’d recommend some stretching so you don’t tear a muscle… Eugh, that’s the worst.” She sits down across from him, straightening her now much longer legs along the floor and Astarion copies the movement. “This is a perfect opportunity because I don’t think you stretch this poor body near enough.
“Now, follow my lead, Husband, but even if you feel like you can go further in your stretches, don’t strain yourself.” One leg is kept straight as the other is bent in, placing her foot against the first leg’s inner thigh. “Try not to arch your back, stay straight and lean forward to touch your toes. You should be able to wrap your hands around your foot.”
Following her verbal instructions and visual cues, Astarion stretches as she does, feeling the pull in his hamstrings. His stomach and chest are pressed against his thigh which isn’t so bad, though he’d prefer them pressed against his actual body.
She demonstrates some more stretches that they perform dutifully before Hircine gives him the go ahead to do as he pleases without wrecking her—his body.
The goal is the splits.
Returning to his feet, Astarion moves off the rug, letting his feet slip slowly out from under him sideways on the polished wood floor. He’s seen Hircine do this a thousand times, she’s always slow and steady with it. Eventually his groin meets the floor, having lowered himself all the way down. Gods, what fun! Hircine is still stretching every single muscle in her body, and Astarion clears his throat to get her attention, smiling deviously. “When we switch back, I am begging you to slide down like this onto my lap, preferably naked.”
She rolls those glinting red eyes, turning over on her side away from him to continue what she was doing in peace, the broad slopes of her back now concealing her completely.
Leaning forward so his stomach presses against the ground, he adjusts his legs out behind him, curling them up and arching his back upwards. 
And just like that, his toes are touching the top of his head.
He giggles quietly to himself, giddy at the strangeness of it. “Maybe we should start stretching together. I want to be able to do this.”
“Honestly, I expected you to be in much worse condition. If we stick to a good schedule, I bet you could be bent in half before the year is over.”
“Only if I get to bend you in half afterwards, my love~” He sings in the nice lilting tone of her voice. 
“Hmmm…” Is her only response. 
Playing around a little longer, Astarion twists this way and that, even doing what she calls a back bend with his forearms and elbows laid flat on the ground. The soreness that's plagued his body settles into a dull ache after all these tests of her flexibility.
Hircine is tense all the time. He can easily recall occasions where he’s rubbed a hand along her shoulders and remarked on the tenseness there. The body must feel so sore since Astarion is more loose…
Has he ever given Hircine a massage? Perhaps not, but now is a good opportunity to try so they can learn what the other wants.
“Pet?” He calls.
Hircine stops rolling her head around on her neck to look at him. “Yes?”
“Care for a massage? I do you, you do me?”
“Oh, that sounds nice.” Getting to her feet, Hircine points to their bed. “Does that work?”
“Yes, love. You lay down first.” He waits at the edge of the bed while she climbs up, bouncing on the balls of his feet. “Actually, uhm—”
“What?” She asks.
He wets his plush lips. “Can you take the clothes off? I need to see myself naked, please!” Voice morphing into a beg, the kind she uses when she wants him to come on her face, the deviant.
Hircine sighs, the sound one he is all too familiar with from himself. 
Gods, this whole experience is strange. 
Always one to give in though, Hircine begins undressing, but that's not what he wants. Rushing forward, Astarion slaps her hands away and starts unfastening each button on his own. 
“You just wanted to feel yourself up, didn't you, Husband?” She says, easily letting him do all the work.
“Guilty as charged, my love~” Ah, the sing-songy tone is very fun. His real voice just doesn't hold those notes as smoothly. 
The shirt is quickly shucked off, baring the smooth planes of his—now Hircine's chest to him. 
Oh, he could just run his tongue over every part of that body. The chiseled pectoral muscles, flat abdominals, those tight pink nipples… He drags the tip of his fingers along every bit, the silky soft feel of his real skin a delight for the senses, making sure to circle the nipples the way Hircine likes and—
Nothing, of course. She stares at him in her usual expectant way. 
Astarion pouts. “Are you not turned on because I'm you or because I'm a woman, now?”
“Both.” Not even a speck of hesitation. 
“Eugh,” How did he end up with a misandrist that is only physically attracted to men? “What if I turned into a man?”
Those glimmering red eyes flick around the room before closing with a groan of disgust. “Then you'd look like my brother and that's even worse.”
Ah, right. 
“Fine.” He sinks into her firm chest, enjoying how it stands strong against his weight. “Hold me tight, please.”
In an instant, Hircine’s arms wrap around him, squeezing Astarion until his breath is forcefully pushed from his lungs in a grunt, and then the pressure is lessened with an “Oops, sorry,” muttered into his hair.
Is he really that strong? 
Alright, that’s enough. Astarion pulls away, holding Hircine at arms length. “Still not naked enough.”
If her pretty claret eyes could roll all the way into the back of her head, they absolutely would. 
He drops to his knees, just the same as Hircine has many nights before this, always ready to please. They can roleplay for a bit, not that it will amount to anything when Hircine won’t get into the mood. More buttons are undone, pants pulled down, and all that’s left is the underwear. Nothing special, of course, because he wasn’t expecting to be eye level with his cock anytime soon—or ever.
A glance up at Hircine, who looks a mix of bored and intrigued, if such a thing is possible. Well, it’s Hircine, so yes, it is. “Are you about to be weird?” She asks.
“Just let me do this, Hircine. Don’t say anything.” It’s a desperate plea.
“Alright. Can I lay down so you can do… whatever it is you’re about to do?”
“Yes.” He springs to his feet, catching her off guard when he shoves against sturdy chest, sending her back onto their cozy bed. The pants are ripped off completely, tossed somewhere far away before Astarion crawls up, hands on her thighs. “Let’s see what all the fuss is about, hmm?” Hircine covers her handsome face with her hands in response. 
Tsk, shy thing. 
Straddling her pale thighs, Astarion bites his lip, taking a deep breath to steady himself as his hummingbird heart hammers away at an alarming pace. The sound has always been so delightful for him, but the feel is something else entirely, not quite painful but also a little unnatural—to him at least, this is normal for his lovely Hircine if all their nights together is anything to go by.
Index fingers feather around the edge of his underwear, teasing, ready to enter at any moment. 
It’s time. He has to see it as it’s meant to be seen.
Both fingers hook under the fabric, tugging each side down to slowly and delicately reveal the hidden treasure underneath. 
For the most part, it’s the same as it's always been, just from a slightly different angle. A cock with testicles. Too bad he can’t get it hard, that’s really what he wants to see. No matter, Astarion can still take a gander. Lifting his flaccid penis, he wraps a hand around it, testing the weight within this body’s smaller grasp. The foreskin is pulled back, exposing the glans. 
Is his mouth watering? 
Astarion ignores that and the heat pooling between his legs currently. It will do him no good to want his body so badly when the one inside it won’t respond well to any advances. 
Gods, they can’t turn back to their bodies soon enough. He needs to be plunging this cock into Hircine's tight cunt now.
He looks up, an arm is thrown over her eyes while he handles his own cock with care. Different bodies be damned, this cock is all his. 
“How does it feel?” He asks in a raspy whisper, his mouth so dry from hanging open as he fights with the urge to do something he probably shouldn’t.
Hircine shrugs, indifferent. He swallows down a sigh. He loves his wife as she is.
Dropping his cock in defeat, Astarion slips the underwear the rest of the way off and—
Maybe just a little smell… He brings them to his face and inhales. The underwear also gets scented with his cologne, not that Hircine cares when she isn't all that turned on by smells the way Astarion is. Rosemary, bergamot, brandy and a touch of undeath. Not surprising.
He sighs again and tosses them into the void with the pants.
Massage time. 
Propping herself up on elbows, Hircine gives him the saddest, wettest eyes he's ever seen. Is that what he looks like when he's pleading? No wonder his poor wife bends over backwards for him—literally.
“I'm sorry, Husband. I am trying, it's just—”
Astarion halts her words with his finger pressed to her lips. “Hush, pet. There is no need to apologize for not liking something. If you aren't into it, then you aren't into it. I would never begrudge you that. Now, roll over so I can sink my hands into those muscles.” 
Always a good listener, Hircine lays face down on the bed with arms crossed under her head for some support. Straddling her hips, which are surprisingly wide comparatively to the body he’s in now—thank the gods Hircine is so flexible—Astarion runs his hands over the rippling muscles in her back. Oh, these are nice. 
The hellish, scar-tissue ‘poem’ etched into his skin is promptly ignored. He's focusing on the good today, not the bad. 
He kneads his small hands into her upper shoulders, trying to press firmly into them until she shows any discomfort, but nothing comes. “How is it?” He asks.
“A little like nothing, honestly… Am I really so weak?”  
Well, that’s disappointing. “I’ve never thought you strong, but I didn’t realize it was this bad. What should I do then? I want you to feel good.”
Lifting her head, Hircine considers what to do. “How about you walk on my back? I bet the weight would feel nice.”
“Gods, my love and her big brain… or is it my brain?” She ‘tuts’ at him as Astarion gets to his feet, balancing carefully atop her back. Even though he’s now used to her more… top-heaviness, what with the mass of hair and her ample bust, balance isn’t something he’s mastered yet, so he steadies himself on a poster of their bed frame. He plants his feet along her shoulder blades. “Is it actually alright to do this to your back?”
“I don’t know—” She groans in his own lustful voice and Astarion’s knees might give out from the sound. Why doesn’t it sound like that to his actual ears? “Ooh, but it feels so good…” If he hadn’t put on panties, slick was going to be dripping from his legs by the end of this. 
He walks up and down Hircine’s broad back, putting attentive focus onto spots that get satisfied moans and groans out of her. The feeling is so strange, just digging his heels and toes into someone’s back instead of using hands as a massage… Maybe they’ll have to do this more often if the noises are anything to go by. 
It’s really hot. This whole thing is so hot. Is he really so attracted to himself or could this possibly be some leftover remains from Hircine’s body? He doesn’t care, Astarion is loving it.
The thighs are a little too slim to fully walk on, so Astarion works a foot and heel into a thigh one at a time, slowly moving up to the real prize.
That beautiful ass. 
It’s perfect. Gods, he hasn’t—Has he even seen it outside of the sides when he twists around best he can? 
Hircine is more into his back from how her hands roam up and down the curves of muscle, trailing along his shoulder blades and spine to the dimples in the small of his back. 
Astarion much prefers the tits and arse, of Hircine and of himself, apparently. 
Settling down to his knees, Astarion roughly pinches one arsecheek and Hircine jolts, peeking over her shoulder with a sharp glare. A wide smile strains his face, probably because Hircine rarely smiles, and he takes handfuls of each of her cheeks, rolling, kneading and squeezing them around. 
He leans down and bites one right in the center—hard enough to leave teeth marks.
Hircine yelps, swatting at Astarion. “Alright, enough, you wild animal.”
“Hircine, my darling love, my sweet pet, my perfect girl,” he begs in her adorable whiney voice, “I completely understand that you aren’t able to… get it up, but can I find some release here? I-I need something, I feel like I’m melting. It’s too much.” Astarion is squeezing his thighs together, anything to help the burning within.
It does not help.
Those deep pools of ruby look over his figure, probably finding it all much too desperate. Hircine chews at a lip, the motion so similar to how she does it in her own body. “I don’t mind, but could we… do it together? I could show you what feels the best to me.”
Astarion dives into her bare chest, wrapping his arms around her neck. “Oh my gods, I love you so much. You're so perfect for me, pet. I can put my fingers in my cunt?”
“Mine or yours?”
“Yes. Both. All of it. Anything, please.”
“You're so hungry, Husband.”
“I always am for you.”
She pulls away, pinching his nose. “And you. Can I put something on, please?”
Daring a peek back down, he sighs at his cock. Wretched thing might not be getting any action tonight. “Yes. Underwear only though. I need that skin-on-skin contact.”
“Yes, my lord.” Hircine mocks in a deep, affected accent as she slides off the bed, searching for wherever he threw the underwear. 
Is that what it sounds like when he’s being a brat? No wonder she finds him so silly all the time. 
“Wait, how should it lay?” Hircine asks. His cockhead sticks straight up out of the underwear, calling to Astarion, pleading to be free once again. 
Ignoring the siren call of his own penis, Astarion laughs, beckoning Hircine over. He sticks his hand into the underwear, holding back the snort of laughter when Hircine jumps while he adjusts his cock until it rests where it should, though it’s weird from this angle. “It should just… feel right? Does it?”
“I think so? I’ll get used to it.” 
“Good. I am very excited, though I’d much rather be back in my body, shoving my fingers and tongue into your cunt instead.”
“And I would much rather have your cock down my throat, but here we are.”
Hircine dirty talking him in his own voice? Could he come from listening to her describe everything in explicit detail?
Oh absolutely, yes. That's undeniable, but he wants something inside of him. So desperately, horrifically much. His cunt is throbbing with need and he knows the panties are soaked through completely. 
“Alright, pet, tell me what to do.” He takes her face in his hands, brushing a thumb across a sharp cheekbone. This is such an amazing experience. Each and every moment will be committed to memory with perfect clarity, if only they had one of those memory shards on hand so they could rewatch this as much as they please.
“I guess it’s time for you to get naked.”
His heart soars, the rhythmic pounding vibrating through his chest. “Will you help me?”
Hircine smiles, soft and sweet and he just adores the way those eyes crinkles around the edges. “Of course, Husband.” She unties the already loosened robe completely, flicking it over and down his shoulder.
With a smug grin, Astarion squeezes his arms around his tits and shakes his shoulders so they jiggle with the movement. He likes it when Hircine does it. 
An unimpressed, raised brow is all he gets for that action. “It's just a mirror.” She mutters.
“A mirror? What do you mean?”
“I'm pretending I'm looking into a mirror. This whole thing,” she waves between the two of them, “is hurting my head. I don't know if it's helping.”
“This hurts your head, but not the—” Astarion winces when, as if summoned, Herma-Mora's discordant chittering pierces a blade through his skull.
A̴̢̭̱̘̖͙̮̭͉̙͓͇̯͙̜͒̆̂͑ǫ̷̼̜͉̦͙̊̎̓͋͗̃͛̕ͅͅb̶̢̭͈̹͖̖͑̈́͂̀͐Ý̵̡͎̪̞͓̭͈́̆̓̏̐̈́̐ͅQ̷̡͉̭̙̪̼̲̪̩̣̣̻͇͕̼͂̍̀
Pinching the bridge of his nose, he groans. “I want it to stop.”
“I rarely ever hear him when I'm… enjoying myself—outside of when I seek him out intentionally. Stop thinking about him.”
“Are you thinking of another man when I'm inside you?!” I'm right here! How could she think of that vile monster when I, a beautiful, gorgeous, heart-breaking piece of man, am by her side?!
“He's not a man, and no, that's not what I meant. Let's move—”
“Hircine, my pet, I'm all for trying out new things, but bringing your mind-invader into the bedroom is not what I—”
Seemingly had enough, Hircine finds his nipples easily and pulls. Not hard, but it's enough for Astarion's brain to pleasantly shatter, the sting of arousal striking white-hot through every fiber of his being. His limbs turn to jelly, his core is screaming for something to fill him. The lewd moan that slips from his mouth couldn't possibly be contained even if he tried when his eyes slam shut, rocking forward in the hopes that Hircine might do more.
Instead, the traitorous (wo)man leans forward with a frown, releasing her tight hold on those peaks of delight much too early. “How about we move on to what's got you so bothered instead? I can smell the change… it's strange…”
“That's how I, uh, always know you're in the mood.” He's panting. His heart’s pounding. This body is absolutely quivering for more. 
How does Hircine keep it together when she responds so wholly with her body?
“Seems like cheating when you can just smell the difference.”
He wipes some drool from the side of his mouth. “That's called a natural advantage, pet. Not my problem that your body just… weeps for me.”
“Do you want to touch yourself or not?” 
He all but launches himself into Hircine’s chest, clutching at the curls that frame her beautifully pointed ears. “Please, I need it!” If he can't have his own cock, then the fingers will have to do. 
“Alright,” she climbs onto the bed, spreading her legs and patting the spot between, “sit here, back to me.” The robe is thrown to the floor, and panties, which are soaked as expected and he beats down the urge to taste them as he always does, are thrown away before Astarion dives in, situating himself right where she asked. Her cool hands immediately slip between his thighs and pry them open with ease, knees raised and feet planted on their soft bedding. The cool air in the room meets the wetness of his cunt for a very refreshing feeling. That’s nice. 
He’s stunned and insanely turned on by the forwardness Hircine is presenting when she is always the one waiting for his command. Being in his body must make her bold. 
“To start, your hands, please, Husband.” Both her hands are held up in waiting, her lips close to his ear, speaking in heady, hushed tones that have him fighting the urge to just shove her fingers into his dripping cunt so he can fuck himself silly on them.
Astarion enthusiastically places his hands in Hircine’s, and she guides them to his heaving chest to cup each breast in a hand. “To get started, sometimes I like to squeeze and roll them around,” and they do just that in tandem, gently squeezing the soft, weighty flesh of his tits, admiring how they spill over in his smaller hands. “Harder,” she whispers, digging their fingers in, right on the cusp of too hard. His head falls back, a breathy moan and wiggling hips, his response to the alluring sensation. 
This is decadent! He can’t believe Hircine is always so quiet in bed when it feels like this. His cunt continues to clench around nothing, and Astarion can barely wait for more.
“And when that isn’t enough anymore,” she says, shifting her grip to lay his fingertips onto his nipples, “then I know this is what I need.” They brush featherlight over the tightened buds, very gently circling around the areolas and good gods, Astarion wishes he could just come from this and literally nothing else. His tits are alight with the most delightful tingle that trails like fire through his stomach and loins, and this is only his touch, not Hircine’s.
“Can you—Can you do it?” He gasps out, arching his back to rest his head on her strong shoulder and jut his chest out. If he doesn’t get some more stimulation, he might explode. 
“Oh, my poor, needy Husband… You want me to touch you?” She coos.
“Fuck—Please, I need it, Hircine!” He demands, rocking back against her, looking down to relish in the way his tits bounce with the action. Finding it within herself to be gracious, Hircine cups his breasts now, thumb and forefingers pinching over his pale nipples to twist them around. His thighs slap together when he moans loud and long and desperate, struggling to comprehend how amazing it feels with her hands on him now. She could probably rip his nipples right off and it would still be one of the best experiences to date. 
She hums, a thoughtful noise that rumbles through her throat, and he can hear the smile in her voice when she speaks next. “I don’t think we play with our ears enough…” A wet tongue snakes along the shell of his ear, shockingly tender and sensitive, and Astarion’s breath hitches. Between the ear licking and the nipple touching, it’s all so much, so perfect, so good. 
And then Hircine pushes his breasts up towards their faces, releasing him so they bounce back into place. “Do it to yourself some more.” She commands, not all that stern in case he were to reject such a thing. As if. Following instructions like the good husband he is, Astarion returns his hands to where they belong, missing Hircine’s touch, but loving his own all the same. 
While he appreciates how much Hircine is getting into this, Astarion is stunned that she is noticeably not hard against his back. How?! 
Oh, well. His pleasure is the most important right now. 
Pinching, pulling, rolling, with this body reacting by clenching, yearning, throbbing… A frantic energy is building up within him, but with his touch on his breasts only, he knows there will be no reaching the brink of satisfaction.
As usual, Hircine’s timing is good, or maybe she knows her body well enough to understand that this kind of play would not be enough. Her fingers tickle down his flat stomach and he watches at it involuntarily clenches at the funny feeling. She then stops right at the apex of his sex, drumming against the pubic bone.
“Hmm, do you want to tease or shall I?” She asks and Astarion’s heart flutters. 
“You.” His desperate response is instantaneous. Why would she ever ask when she knows it’s so much better that she do it?
One hands scoops up a breast, lightly massaging it in a firm grip, but much to his dismay, the nipple is ignored entirely while her other hand pries open his thighs once again, palm and fingers smoothing along the supple flesh of his inner thigh, occasionally circling dangerously close to his lower lips before skirting away to repeat the motion. On his own, he could see how this wouldn’t be all that exciting, but with Hircine’s strong hands initiating, it has him on the verge of begging. 
On another lazy pass by his folds, Hircine leaves her hand to rest there, but finally offers some relief from the toying by brushing the thumb on her other hand over a peaked bud, and Astarion realizes he’s been holding his breath for much, much too long, his chest constricting with need until he sucks one in with a gasp as his hips jerk up, eager for Hircine to continue.
Her quiet voice, insistent and urging, reaches him. “Touch yourself, Husband.”
Biting back a moan, Astarion does as he's told, no hesitation, digits sliding down his stomach just as she did before, aiming for that swollen, sensitive bundle of nerves that he knows gets Hircine off so well. The second his fingers make contact, crackling sparks of pleasure jolt through his body, unleashing a debauched gasp that he didn't even know Hircine’s body was capable of. 
He’ll take more of that. His fingers slip down further, swirling just outside the hungry mouth of his cunt to coat himself in slick, and that movement is carried back up to the clit, gently rubbing around it for the most glorious sensation. Hircine, not one to sit idly by, turns her attention to his tits, kneading them with fervent affection and pulling on the impossibly, hardened peaks. He’s so breathless as his hips buck, searching for some more friction. 
“Oh, fuck, Hircine, it’s so, so good!” He mewls as she tenderly pinches his nipples. “Can-Can I put my fingers inside? Please, I want it so bad!”
He can hear how she licks her lips, letting out a quiet huff of laughter. “Are you going to fuck yourself on your fingers?”
“Yes!”
“Then do it.” She whispers. 
Instantly, he sinks his middle finger inside that glorious wet heat, then another follows immediately after because Astarion is craving it so deeply. His cunt grips his fingers as they slide in and out at a slow, cautious pace, reveling in how slick and warm and hot it is. While Astarion is lost in himself, Hircine flicks her fingers across his clit and roughly twists one of his nipples with the other hand, and he is lost to the shock of overwhelming euphoria that burns its way through his body. Her strokes on his clit continue, gentle and sensuous, urging him down a path to a mind-blowing orgasm, the likes he might not have experienced before. 
A third finger is added, a comfortable stretch inside him as he seeks out that spot Hircine loves so much and gods, does he want it. The coil is tightening within his belly, and Astarion presses back into Hircine, whining and moaning and gasping, and then—
Hircine stops, stilling all her movements completely.
Astarion is a yearning, flustered mess as he removes his fingers, panting hard when no release comes to ease the overwhelming burn. “Wh-Why did you stop?!” 
“It’s not fun if you come so quickly… I like the buildup, personally.” Her cold lips meet his cheek for a loud, smacking kiss that leaves him feeling dissatisfied. 
“Tch, I want to come, not play games.” Guess he’ll have to take his pleasure into his own hands if she’s going to be evil.
Wrapping an arm over his tits and covering his clit with her hand, Hircine smiles deviously against him. “No, we’re going slow.”
He scowls, “Is this because I fingered you under the desk while that gnome was asking for an advance payment last week?”
“Hmm, well now that you remind me… Yes. It is.” Hircine nibbles at his ear, fangs scraping against the sensitive skin there so gooseflesh raises across Astarion’s body, and he shivers. Running her fingers down through his puffy folds, she dips into his cunt once, then twice, before stroking the entrance and back up to his clit, teasing gently. “Also, my dear husband, I think it’s only fair that you know what it's like to be played with.”
It’s outright vengeance. Fine, they can play. He opens his slim legs as wide as he can, offering himself up completely for whatever Hircine has planned. Her fingers have warmed up to his body temperature now as she swirls them around, making a mess of his slick all along his cunt lips and thighs, occasionally giving some much needed attention to Astarion’s clit so he whines and squirms at the pleasure that strikes through his nerves.
Touch like this could feel just as good in his own body, but maybe it's the thrill, the strangeness, of being different that has him singing so much for each stroke, swipe and pinch. Hircine is rarely ever interested in self-pleasure unless he asks for a show, so the fact that she’s able to toy with him so well like this, knowing exactly the buttons to push, is a wonderful surprise. 
If it’s some advanced level of torture she’s learned or the height of absolute delight, Astarion is brought so close to the edge of oblivion, only to be brought back down again and again… and again, while Hircine whispers sweet nothings and taunts into his ears.
Whether her vengeance has been sated or she just knows he’s had enough, Hircine nuzzles her nose into his neck, trailing up until she murmurs in that decadent and deep voice. “Had enough, Husband?”
“Please.” A whispering plea slips past his lips, chest heaving and sweat clinging to his body as she works him over so thoroughly. Slickened fingers are brought to his mouth, and Astarion opens, keen to taste that nectar he so eagerly feasts on any other night. Musky, salty and sweet, not quite the same as it is when he’s tasting with his own tongue, but delicious all the same. Seeking out her lips, they meet in a slow, heated kiss to share his arousal. 
Hircine hums when she breaks away, red eyes narrowed thoughtfully. “Different… Interesting. I’ll stop playing with you now.”
He melts into her chest, drawing circles over one of his pale nipples with an index finger, “Oh, thank the gods, I’m rea—Ah!” She buries two fingers inside his cunt before he can finish speaking, curling them up just right to hit that spot inside, while the other hand seeks out the rosy bud at the apex of his sex, rubbing it perfectly between her fingers. Astarion’s been kept mercilessly at the edge of bliss, so these intent ministrations by Hircine shoves him right over. 
His eyes screw shut while a choked cry echoes out into their bedroom as he comes, writhing in her arms when shockwaves of his orgasm overtake this body. Stars are seen, breath is trapped in his chest, and his nails dig into his tits while each rippling wave sends him reeling in euphoria. The two stroking fingers inside of his core are constricted as the walls of his cunt pulse in tune with his fluttering heartbeat, ebbing slowly to an occasional twinge as Hircine helps him ride each crest, before it abates fully, and Astarion is left a trembling and limp pile of limbs.
Eventually enveloped in a tight embrace, Hircine holds him close, placing sweet pecks to his temple. “Was that what you wanted?”
He groans and swallows to wet his dry throat, feeling like dropped jelly. “Does… it always feel like that?”
“Sometimes.”
“Fuck, that’s amazing.” Finally some sense is returned to his loose arms and legs, and Astarion curls up against Hircine, feeling purely satisfied. “Thank you, my love.” His eyes are already growing heavy, all the energy drained from his body after that mind-bending orgasm. 
Maybe after a short nap, everything will return to normal.
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le-trash-prince · 2 months ago
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Em, I came into the whole 'Benz-Garfield are desperate to get paired and/or make KimKenta happen' thing halfway through and I feel like I'm still desperately playing catch-up. Congratulations to them on making Part A happen and good luck with Part B, though! But in the interests of me continuing to play catch-up on this whole fascinating process, do you know if there's a timeline of events or a tiktok folder or *something* out there to help me piece together when all of this properly took off and when Benz in particular decided to go full unhinged with it?
Thanks for your help!
Anon if you weren't watching Pit Babe as it aired, I hope you are prepared for the emotional roller coaster that happens when you are waiting every week to see if Kim and Kenta even get screentime together. I felt like I was watching the last several episodes of Pit Babe on a fever high.
I am actually working on a timeline, but it’s not fully cohesive nor complete yet, since there’s simply so much to sift through on multiple social media platforms, and no platform has a perfect search function. It also doesn’t yet include social media posts where they were simply just… flirting with each other, but all the social media posts on the blog should at least be dated.
If you want to go through things more quickly, the archive page has a tag filter (one of my favorite tumblr features), and you can swap in any tag you like in the url, since the dropdown only lists featured tags.
It’s also hard to pinpoint a single moment when Benz decided to go unhinged with it, since he’s been pushing it from pretty early on. There also aren’t any dedicated translators in BenzGarfield fandom who are fluent in both Thai and English, so we either get machine translations or translations that are few and far between. There's also a lot of old posts that have been deleted, or accounts that have gone private, so even just the act of gathering everything is an effort, let alone organizing it into a big picture.
Here's what I can give as a highlight timeline though.
They met in late 2022 (Love Fest Thailand in November or December I think, I couldn't find pics, but I did just watch an old interview last night where they talk more in depth on their first impressions, which I plan on recording and uploading, but Garfield said something that can be paraphrased to the extent of "Do people this friendly and charming exist in real life?")
Benz was mingling with Change2561 actors, but they officially became coworkers in Feb 2023 when they were both cast in Pit Babe
Boys Journey started filming very shortly after—I don’t have a sharp timeline but the range is sometime from Feb to May. Benz was already going at it in Boys Journey (“BenzGarfield forever” - ep 10), when they ostensibly didn’t know their roles or if they’d be put in an actual ship (they were somewhat rotated around with ppl until later in Boys Journey, when I imagine the staff had chemistry based partnerships in mind)
In March, Garfield said he would choose Benz to flirt with out of all the cast.
By August, Benz was asking Garfield to take his last name 🤷‍♂️ (but Garfield keeps trying to take Benz's first name instead)
There was a lot going on while Pit Babe was filming (Sept-Nov). They were excited about filming the two whole scenes they had together, they tweeted about it the night before, they were improvising what communication between Kenta and Kim might be like, Benz was visiting set even when he didn't have any scenes (albeit likely for the free food, but keeping Garfield company while Charlie fakes his death is a nice bonus)
I haven’t been able to find it again (yet)(thank you YT’s horrible search function) but there was a livestream last year where Benz talked about Kenta calling Kim and inviting him to Thailand, which… never happened, so I can only assume they were at the point of making things up (which actors sometimes do when they need a better grip on a character), and probably explains the really loaded look they gave each other in the elevator, bc to them there had been more interactions between their characters.
The first event they did together (outside of full-cast stuff) was the RealMe sponsorship in September 2023, but it was presented as Garfield & Benz (didn’t stop Benz from once again asking Garfield to take his name). The first time (that I’m aware of) that they had an event with their ship name was the GarfieldBenz x Central Rayong event in December 2023. Filming was completed in November, so they obviously had known for a while that KimKenta weren’t a couple, but that wasn’t going to stop them from bickering over which of their characters would like the other first
In February, they were posting really shippy stuff right before the Pit Babe finale, which felt like queerbaiting at the time, but we didn’t know that Long Beans was being planned (they would begin the physio workshop a month later), so I think this was either a “we’re excited we get to play a ship but can’t say anything yet” or a “staff hasn’t made up their minds on casting us so let’s just show some potential.”
Also at the finale in February, Garfield said he wanted to be Kim's faen.
By the time Long Beans was announced in March and they were officially announced as BenzGarfield, there was no holding back, especially on the KimKenta front. Benz made a fuss during Long Beans presscon about them not getting any screentime together, and during the Changing event in April they talked about going to the writers and begging for KimKenta/KentaKim.
Anytime they're asked about S2, they're vague about it, and I imagine they will be until we see something onscreen (they have to keep me desperate and foaming at the mouth), but they have expressed that they want to continue working as screen partners for a long time. If KimKenta happens I don't think anyone will be happier than those two.
I hope this helps, anon! Trying to capture and organize all of their moments is a daily task, and it sometimes feels like I am Sisyphus.
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illtakethatroad · 8 days ago
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I'm not quite sure how to word this properly since I've been out of the writing game for a while but I'll try. So...hear me out.
I was letting my mind wander after seeing this picture and it's very foreboding. It's GREAT and it got the wheels in my head turning. (Now here's where I'm probably going to mess up something/everything because it's been YEARS since I've written anything Naruto related but...)
I've seen fics branch out and have Tobirama go forward in time since Flying Raijin is a space-time jutsu. So I'm thinking about it in a 'space and time' context and wondering if it's possible for him to jump forward while also moving to a different 'space,' so to speak. What if he takes or swaps out the place of a different reality's version of him? What if he lands in a universe where Madara won and succeeded in enacting the Eye of the Moon plan but without the whole Kaguya thing afterwards?
And then I got to thinking more on it, contemplating what other differences there could be. Which led to this universe's version of him and Madara meeting at the Naka River and became somewhat friends instead of how it turned out in Tobirama's timeline. At least getting friendly enough to the point to Madara, albeit subconsciously at the time, sees Tobirama as his even after the reveal of them being from opposing clans. Perhaps it was done by Hashirama because that's his little brother and the way Madara looks at him sometimes is unnerving. Whether or not it's the same as canon but with different players is up for debate because I'm only skimming the surface of this thought. Clearly, things didn't end well for them because, again, Infinite Tsukuyomi happened. But here's where things get interesting.
Madara, upon seeing him actually living instead of Edo Tensei'd, is all, "Oh, so you've finally decided to show up." And Tobirama is very confused because where is he? Why is there a giant tree with what looks like mummified bodies strung up? Why does Hashirama look like that when he saw him hale and hardy yesterday? On that note, why does Hashirama look absolutely terrified when he looks at Tobirama? And why does Madara sound so...pleased to see him when, ordinarily, he can't stand to be within ten feet of him? Madara, taking his moment of silence or a surprised, 'What?' as a means to continue, goes on to explain that he's seen this moment coming and has been waiting for it to happen for a very, very long time. And now that Tobirama's here with any type of resistance being futile at this point, as no one can stop Madara now, he makes it clear that Tobirama won't be escaping now and that Hashirama won't be able to stop him this time. He then tells Tobirama that he needn't worry as Madara doesn't plan on killing him. However, he needs him out of the way to finish what he's started before taking what's rightfully his.
And Tobirama makes the mistake of looking Madara in the face during this exchange and catches sight of the Rinnegan and starts to tip over like he going to fall because he's put in a Genjutsu/sleep-like state but Madara or Hashirama, I'm not sure at this point, catches him before he hits the ground but the last thing Tobirama sees is Hashirama looking so, so scared as he rushes towards him.
I know it's a jumbled mess of rambles but I want to emphasize the danger Tobirama's unknowingly gotten himself into and that Hashirama KNOWS the kind of danger it is. One that he'd managed to prevent years ago and had convinced his Tobirama that Madara was dangerous. Think Optimal Sibling Hashirama if we're going by AO3 tags. But it's not a noncon levels of danger but more like an Uchiha is OBSESSED with him and will burn the world down if he has to just to get to him.
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nattikay · 2 years ago
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Shoutout to my mom who let me dump a bunch of spoilers on her so I could cry about Neteyam. Finally had the chance to get all that sobbing that dehydration robbed me of yesterday out of my system, and I’m feeling a little better now. I mean, the situation still makes me sad, but I don’t think I’ll continue to have my eyes suddenly start leaking every other hour like they did for most of today. :’)
so uuuhhh now that I’ve more or less gotten over that hurdle, I can finally sit down and make a post about all the other stuff from the movie! So here’s a list of some of the other thoughts and observations I had, not exactly comprehensive cuz this is all coming after 24 hours of grieving so I may not remember every single little thought I had, but here we go anyways (also tagging @tenebrius-excellium cuz you said you wanted to hear my thoughts):
-I just want to watch the first five or so minutes on loop for a while (although maybe without the cuts to Neytiri singing the songcord because 🥲, good golly the moment I saw that shot I, already being familiar with the lore behind songcords, was like oh NOOOOO), just the scenes of those ~14 peaceful years where the kids are growing up and the RDA is gone and everyone is happy together and it’s all just so sweet, this is the content I want, I want more of it, please pretty please, I know it’ll be a while before all the gif-makers are able to get a hold of those scenes but man as soon as they do goodness gracious I’m just gonna stare at it all for hours 😭
-While I was already assuming that the Metkayina didn’t actually know English and that we the audience were only hearing English for convenience, I was expecting that issue not to be directly addressed. So I was pleasantly surprised when it was subtly addressed with Jake’s voiceover about now being familiar enough with the Na’vi language to understand it as easily English as the audio of the kids bickering swapped from Na’vi to English. Theory confirmed!
-Speaking of the Na’vi language, I did feel very excited because I was able to understand some of the unsubtitled lines, which was a goal! so yay!! I mean, I didn’t understand every Na’vi line spoken (some of the longer ones I’ll definitely have to listen to more than once to piece together), but to even understand any of it at all, especially the ones without subtitles, felt very awesome!! dopamine rush babey!!!
-And on that note, the fact that Quaritch of all characters was making an effort to learn the language really surprised me! He struck me as the type of character to not give two craps about that sort of thing but hey. I definitely got a kick of out of Spider absolutely roasting him for his lack of skills hrh (note, I very most certainly do not condone actually mocking new learners making mistakes, obviously, but seeing as this is Quaritch we’re talking about...^^”) Spider’s line here was also a place I even managed to catch a subtitle discrepancy -- iirc, the subtitles read “You sound like a three-year-old!” but the actual line was nga plltxe na ‘eveng ahì’i! you speak like a small child! Which, I mean, y’know, same gist, but it was cool to be able to understand the actual words!! I also greatly enjoyed Spider trying to teach Quaritch the distinction between na and nga, just because man that’s one of those things every learner has been through, idk it was delightful to watch it go down between canon characters hrh
-Speaking of Quaritch and Spider....wow, I was surprised just how early they dropped the “Quartich’s son” bomb. That had been a pretty popular and plausible theory for a while, but I was expecting it to either be left up to interpretation or used as a bombshell later in the film. But nope, from the get-go it’s pretty heavily implied that not only is Quaritch Spider’s biological father, but that they’re both aware of this. So. Yeah, that was certainly a surprise.
-Kiri “I would rather drink acid than have Norm be my biological father” good gracious girl! like I mean yes the idea that Norm and Grace were secretly hookin’ up is obviously preposterous, but what did Norm ever do to you to deserve that reaction ^^; haha
-I mentioned in my High Ground post the three primary theories on Kiri’s origins. Having now seen the movie, I now think the mystical-Eywa-conception theory is by far the most likely. However, canonically it still remains a mystery/up to interpretation. Perhaps we’ll get more answers in movie 3...
-Y’know what, vulgarity is not typically my type of humor, but Lo’ak flippin’ Quaritch the double bird when asked to let him see his fingers did get a chuckle out of me hrh
-hey um yo the Metkayina kids were absolute JERKS, what the heck?? like good golly heckin’ rude. Except for Tsireya she’s chill I like her :)
-Personally I don’t think the story of this movie is a total rehash of the first one overall, but I can very mostly definitely see how people would consider it so. There were several lines in two scenes in particular, the one where the Sullies arrive at the Metkayina clan and the one with the tulkun hunters, that were just soooooo similar to lines from the first movie, not quite verbatim but certainly awkwardly close. I can absolutely see this becoming a common complaint from internet critics.
-Tuk pretty much solely exists to make the audience go d’awwwww!!, and y’know what, that’s ok because boy did she succeed :’)
-unfortunately, Quaritch’s ikran has by far the coolest design of all the ikrans, like bruh that color palette is heckin’ dope. what a shame ur now stuck with this jerk lol. Though I did snicker at Quaritch feeling the need to bond with the ikran “the hard way” solely because he couldn’t stand to be outdone by Jake lol
-I liked Lo’ak and Payakan’s friendship, it was very sweet. Also very interesting design-wise that a tulkun’s queue is in his mouth, and that the mouth has more of those bioluminescent patterns on the inside.
-The fact that the tulkun hunters are 100% aware that the species they’re hunting is fully sapient feels very ick to me. Sir that’s...that’s murder. Good gracious. and um “tulkun brain juice stops human aging” wh...what?? can uh...can we get some more explanation on that??? like is that gonna be somehow relevant to later movies or is it just some arbitrary thing to make the brain juice valuable, valuable enough to attempt to justify murder idk but uh....yyyyyyeah 😬
-minor thing, but I was surprised that the swimming baby from the trailer was, in fact, not Ronal’s. In fact, we never actually meet Ronal’s baby, which, again, surprised me. Why make her pregnant if we don’t get to see the baby, it feels kinda random ^^; to link her to her spirit tulkun who just had a calf I guess?? idk. once again, maybe it’ll become more relevant in movie 3.
-until proven otherwise, I am heretofore declaring that final “a son for a son” line to be Spider’s official adoption into the Sully family 😭😭😭
anyways, I guess that’ll do for now. I’m sure there was other stuff but I’ve been sitting here typing for over an hour already. Perhaps later I’ll come back with more comments, idk. I’ll be seeing the movie again next week with the rest of my family, so maybe I’ll notice different things/remember stuff that got swallowed up in the feels. Will I cry more than I did on my first viewing because I’m gonna try not to go in dehydrated again, or less because by then I’ll have had a week to process and accept everything? I have literally no idea. Guess we’ll have to just wait and see...
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endwersed · 6 months ago
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WIP Wednesday
Cashing in on the open tag from the amazing @renmackree 💖
Here's a bit more from my current Sterek FWB AU - you don't see me. Derek continues to be straight (ha, sure) and Stiles continues to enable him. A li'l nsfw.
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“I feel like I should argue, on account of your heterosexuality, and all,” Stiles says, tongue darting out to wet his lips for a second, “but I’m definitely way too horny to be a gentleman right now, so… get your pants off and get over here, Hale.”
Derek doesn’t quite trip and fall into a heap on the floor in his haste to step out of his shorts and briefs – but it’s a pretty near thing.
The clothes leave a dark cotton puddle behind his hurried footsteps, and it’s barely any time at all before he finds himself kneeing his way onto the bed, the soft mattress dipping beneath him as he chases Stiles towards the centre of it. Stiles has this huge, borderline ridiculous grin on his face as he watches Derek catch up to him, his eyes lidded, the brown almost entirely eaten up by the black of his pupils as he looks his fill.
In the mussed-up sheets, his fingers flex and unflex, pulling the fabric between his knuckles as he rolls his bottom lip between his teeth. The inviting smile remains around it.
Without a word needing to pass between them, Stiles leans himself up and rolls himself over, flopping down onto his belly, the round of his perky ass now on full display for Derek’s laser focus. He pulls his legs underneath himself and shoves his shoulders against the bed, presenting himself face down and ass up, his knees shifting apart as he twists his head on the pillow to peer at Derek over his shoulder.
Derek knows he looks more than a little moronic right now; blinking down at Stiles with a gaping mouth, his hand curled tightly around his dick to stroke himself to full hardness – not that it takes much at all. But there’s very little he can do about it when it feels like his brain is threatening to leak out of his ears pretty much any second now.
“Condom?” he just about finds the cells to ask.
Immediately, he kind of really hates himself for even offering in the first place. Truly, he cannot think of something on this godforsaken earth that he wants more than to feel Stiles' tight, hot asshole clinging around his raw cock.
But it's what he should do; it's the right thing to do. So, even as he burns to bite them back, he lets the words spill from his lips just like acid, all the same.
Derek's skin grows hot with a renewed hunger when Stiles gives a quick shake of his head.
“I’m not seeing anyone. Still clean.” He shoves his forearms beneath the pillow he rests his head against, hips hitching just that little bit backwards, still not quite close enough for any skin-to-skin contact. “You?”
Derek feels something settle in the deep recesses of his bones, hearing that from Stiles. A question, unasked but introspectively obsessed upon, all the same, has been nudging at his bristling consciousness ever since Scott and Allison’s engagement party. A question of whether anything had blossomed from Scott practically forcing Stiles to meet that loser Brad.
He knows that they swapped numbers, couldn’t get away from the conversation fast enough to avoid hearing Stiles telling Scott all a-fucking-bout it. But he could never find the right way to ask Stiles whether anything came of that exchange; whether this… thing between them, between Derek and Stiles, had a quickly approaching expiry date, because somebody finally clued up and realised that Stiles is quite possibly the ultimate gay catch.
With a deep-seated sense of tranquility, he knows, now. Stiles isn’t seeing anyone. Stiles is still in this, with him. Stiles is still… his.
Whatever the fuck that means.
“Yeah,” Derek finally answers Stiles’ returned question. “Still clean, too.”
Stiles flashes him a grin, all teeth and promise.
“Then what are you waiting for, big guy?” he goads. “I was ready before you even joined the party.”
-
Low low low pressure tags 🥰 @dear-massacre @eevylynn @hedwig221b @lucky-bishop @violetfairydust
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emilykaldwen · 8 months ago
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The Maiden and the Drowning Boy | Aegon x OC | Chapter Five
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Rating: Explicit Ships: Aegon II Targaryen x Abrogail Strong (Lyonel Strong's Daughter), Jacaerys Velaryon x Helaena Targaryen
Summary: As the kingdom teeters on the edge of chaos, Alicent Hightower swaps the pieces on the board: Aegon will marry Abrogail Strong, Larys’ younger sister and heir to Harrenhal. Caught in the web of intrigue and political machinations, the pair must figure out where their loyalties lie, and what they mean to one another.
Tropes: Childhood Sweethearts/Friends to Lovers, Generational Trauma and Cycles of Abuse, It's All About the Character Development, Unreliable Narrators, Multi-POV, Canon Divergent, Bisexual Aegon II Targaryen, Book/Show Mash Up, Fix-It Of Sorts, Stopping the Cycle of Abuse before it gets us all killed, Team Neutral, fairy tale vibes meets victorian medievalism meets grrm
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Chapter One | Chapter Two | Chapter Three | Chapter Four
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CHAPTER FIVE - PAIN IN MY HEART
Some time has passed for the dust to settle in the wake of the betrothal, unshed tears, and attempts at fratricide. Aegon and Abby begin adjusting to the new state of things and Alicent begins to show her hand. Mommy issues abound for all.
The maester's hands were cold and uncomfortable as they examined him, searching for sores and whatever the fuck else he rattled on about as he came entirely too close to his person. Aegon's fists clenched at his sides, his head tilted back so he had no chance of catching sight of the grizzled head below him, bobbing around his cock. It would certainly ruin any pleasure that he would ever experience again.
It was too damn early for this. The sun was still creeping over the walls of the Keep, not even past the early morning. Dreadful.
"No unsightly marks, your Grace," the man affirmed. "Ensure that any pleasure house you visit keeps clean quarters, and you should be safe from giving illness to your Lady wife."
His Lady wife. He saw the smile that graced her features, the spray of freckles along her nose and cheeks. Her bright eyes were blue as the sky he found escape in, and her cascade of sunset curls were his. Every bit of her would belong to him in a few moons. Cool hands that tempered his fevered skin would touch him without a barrier. The soft pout of her heart-shaped mouth pressed open by his thumb-
"I don’t need guidance on spreading illness to my wife when I visit her bed. I’m more concerned about avoiding having my cock fall off," he snapped defensively, yanking his trousers up as soon as the maester pulled away, not wanting the stirring from where his thoughts had been wandering to manifest in front of his current company. Ser Criston was on the other side of the low partition and Aegon did not need to meet his gaze to know that he was being examined and judged and found wanting.
Aegon could barely resist mouthing the words that followed, for they were as familiar as his mother's prayers. "Every woman is an image of the Mother and should be treated with respect," Cole reminded him with a level voice. Aegon knew it, as intimately as his mother's judgment, that the man was disappointed; disappointed in his inability to be better in the training yard, and his inability to keep his cock in check.
For as long as Aegon could remember, Ser Criston Cole had been by his mother’s side and by extension, that of him and his siblings. While Viserys (he could never think of the rotting king as his father, only Sire, for all that the word entailed) had noticed him in Aegon’s earliest memories, telling him how he would tame a dragon one day, and regaling his young self with stories of the Black Dread, it was Criston who came to his mind when one asked or spoke about father. Just as he desired to keep and then win back his mother’s affection, lost to time as it had been, he felt the same with the man who was currently judging him like the Father and Warrior themselves. Once, Cole had seemed heartened by Aegon’s natural talent with a blade and his hunger to prove himself in the training yard, especially in the face of Rhaenyra’s growing brood of dark haired brats. It hadn’t hurt as much then, the lessons. The weight had not come upon him all at once. It was a slow build. Stone by stone, they pressed down on his shoulders, with each turn of the moon until he struggled beneath the weight of the expectation.
His mother’s growing paranoia and panic with each new son born to his sister, and what Aegon suspected was pressure from outside sources, left his cheeks mottled pink and red from her hands and the bite of her nails on his shoulders. It left him sensitive to raised voices and sudden movements. It left him pretending to be more in his cups than he was, if only to keep watch of what went on around him, what people said, what someone might do to him. Then came the times when he was beyond caring of his fate and hoping some percent oblivion might be found beyond the next bottle.
Cole’s growing shift in praise to Aemond and his increasing barbs for Aegon to pay attention and how a warrior and a prince did not prowl after the ladies and the serving maids poured salt on the growing wounds his mother gouged.
“A man saves himself to perform his husbandly duties,” he’d said when catching him in the hall with his tongue down Lady Melia’s throat when he was three and ten. The older girl had been dismissed from his mother’s service within days of the event.
Ser Harrold had told him that he should not force himself on a lady, that a good and honorable man does not use his power as an advantage over young lasses. A good and honorable man treats them with respect. “A man denies the temptation to sully himself for one night for a simple promise or a hope of a dream,” he’d said when Aegon had been dragged back from the Street of Silk, soaked to the bone from the rainstorm, and bruised and beaten from the paramour of the woman who’d lured him in. He’d been five and ten. She had been the daughter of a merchant, sharp and lovely with brown ringlets that frizzed in the heat. Aegon thought she loved him, or at the very least, desired him enough that maybe he could run away from everything that hurt. Maybe, with this other woman and her dark curling hair, he could forget how beautiful Abby looked laughing beneath the dappled sunlight of the weirwood tree, for surely he would never be allowed to have her. She would be sent away, meant for someone else because he was a growing disappointment and do you not see how Aemond applies himself? Why is it so difficult for you?
Ser Harwin had sat him, Aemond, and Jace down one afternoon after coming upon them doing something ridiculous in the garden. He couldn’t remember if it was because he had pulled Abby’s hair, or the fact that Aemond and Jace had been fighting over something - a toy or some such nonsense. He’d said that when you found the perfect someone, you would make a deal with the seven devils if you had to, to be with them. And that it was always worth it.
“Women and young ladies are not here for such earthly pleasures. They are all that is pure and good in the world, and are ruined beyond measure when they fall into the depths of pleasures of the flesh. Every woman is the image of the Mother, and every young girl the Maiden herself. Protected and unsullied,” Criston said when Aegon had come bounding to him, barely ten years of age, flushed and with bubbling nerves and excitement in his belly. He’d asked if Abby kissing his cheek meant that she loved him. “Do you think Mother would let me marry her if I asked?’” For she was his Rhaenys, and Cole knew his mother better than anyone in the world.
‘Always with the Mother,’ Aegon thought, feeling as if the cascading shadow of the Seven-Pointed Star shone on him now. ‘Always with the Mother, and every girl an image of the Maiden, so thank you so much for that.’
The smile Aegon turned on the Kingsguard was deceptively innocent, dimpled cheeks and all. "Funny, pretty sure the two I fucked the other night would have my queenly mother scream in terror and bar herself in the sept."
Now Ser Criston wasn't even trying to hide the look of judgment on his oh so perfect face. Aegon snatched his tunic off the partition and shoved his arms through. "Is she going to keep me under house arrest until the tourney? The wedding? Lock me in a tower like a maiden in a song?"
"Your mother could have married you to the princess."
Aegon felt a curl of nausea in his stomach at the thought of bedding his sweet sister, regardless of the custom of his forefathers. "And make dear little Aemond a kinslayer? I would not survive long enough to make it to the sept."
"Or she could decide to marry Lady Abrogail to your brother."
“And we’re back to Aemond kinslaying, or worse, to get himself out of a marriage he never asked for. Not with our sweet sister right there and ripe for the taking.” It mattered little to Aemond that it was becoming increasingly obvious to anyone who cared to look that Helaena’s affections had withered, that, in truth, they had really never been what their little brother thought they were. Aegon scoffed. “It puts us all back in the same boat." His gaze flitted to meet the knight's through the mess of hair hanging in his eyes. "Me miserable and alone, or dead. Such love you hold for me. Not to mention, how cruel of you to flaunt my betrothed’s narrowly avoided demise to prove a point." His waspish tone didn’t feel like enough to banish the pressure of unease that settled inside Aegon’s chest at the thought of harm befalling Abby, poor point or not.
Such love and regard his family held for him, while screaming that he was to be king. Expecting one thing from him, and something he didn't want.
At least we like one another. That counts for something, doesn't it, Aegon?
But it didn’t count, did it? Liking had nothing to do with what he wanted. He didn’t want the neglect and cruelty within his parents’ marriage. He didn’t want Abby to simply like him.
Aegon lifted his wrist to adjust the cuff of his sleeve and hissed softly when the fabric dragged over the healing scratches Abby had left. He instinctively pressed his mouth against the injury to soothe it before doing the clasp. So rarely did Abby’s teeth bite at him, and there was something satisfying and pleasing at the reminder of it.
Unlike Cole, who continued to speak to him as if he were a child, as if he were some squire or recruit. Sometimes Aegon felt as if the knight treated him no better than a troublesome hound. As if the man were his true father, thinking it his right to speak to him in the same tone he already heard from his mother. This man was Kingsguard, his mother’s sworn shield, and if they were so hellbent on making him king one day, Cole would answer to him. Perhaps he should remind Cole of that more often.
"You didn't answer my question, Ser Criston." Still waspish, his tone grew firmer. He might not be king yet, but Aegon was a Prince of House Targaryen, one of his father’s heirs, and a dragonrider - no mere mortal man, not a backwater soldier from who knows where.
Cole watched him steadily, the muscle in his jaw ticking before averting his eyes "Not so much locked in a tower, but confined to the Keep, my prince.” Cole spoke as if the proper etiquette physically pained him and Aegon smirked, humming softly. “You may go to the Dragonpit, escorted, but should you try anything, your mother has ordered that we bar you from it."
Something ugly curled in his chest and he barked out a laugh as he pushed open the door and headed out. "Cruel woman." It almost impressed him. Only once had they ever barred him from Sunfyre, and it was when he thought, after several cups, that going riding was the best idea ever. He still thought it was. His mother? Not so much.
He still had the scars from her nails along his elbow. A half crescent around the joint like a bite mark.
Cole was not far behind, and he glanced sidelong at the man. "Is there a schedule now? Classes with Aemond and his favorite maester? How lovely to be shown up by him in another arena."
"Well, that's why you're going to the yard. Your… everything could use some work. And it'll be a good release for you, since you're under confinement."
They had confined Mother for three moons before she had Daeron. Seven hells, he and Abby were going to have to have children. He was supposed to sire heirs and be a father, and his father was utter shit. But making heirs wouldn't be so bad?
A clap on his shoulder jogged him back to attention. "Physical exertion helps."
Aegon sneered. "Says a man who doesn't fuck. You can't trust a man who doesn't fuck, with only his own hand for company." He made a lewd stroking gesture before miming a spray of victory.
"Says a man who was once seven and ten," Ser Criston corrected, and Aegon rolled his eyes. His point still stood. Fucker never gave into the bait that he laid for him. Aegon still felt annoyed, although he acknowledged it deserved some respect.
As they reached the training yard, his eyes still bleary with sleep and the lingering headache, the coil of tension in his chest eased. Aemond was not alone, making the impending humiliation more bearable. Helaena may cheer for every time he'd get whipped in the yard, but there was no malice in his sweet sister.
"Good morning!" Helaena sang, her voice like a bell bouncing off the worn red brick of the yard, and she waved excitedly at him and Ser Criston. "It's been so long since I've seen you with a sword."
Sweet, supportive sister.
Aegon peered into the basket she was holding, snatching a piece of gingerbread. "Wine?" he asked with a hopeful look.
"Mother says you're to dry out so that you stop sweating wine." Aemond's tone was neutral, but his sly little smirk - what Mother would call sweet innocence - was all that he needed to provide.
"Does she not care to witness her son's humiliation that she ordered by her own queenly command?" His voice was light as he pulled on his padded coat over his tunic. At least Ser Criston was letting him ease back into things. No need to cut him and have him grow leprous the way their father had. He felt a vague dread at his siblings' pitying glances. He yanked at the strap on his tunic as Aemond moved towards the ring, twirling his wooden sword in hand.
His brother had long moved to live steel and Aegon's bitterness was acrid in the back of his throat. Or maybe it was just the lingering effects of the wine. He grimaced at the weight of the practice sword in hand and reached for a second one. It had been months since he'd dragged himself to the training yard. When Aemond lost his eye, he threw himself into the blade, and Aegon felt overshadowed as his brother earned admiration and love for something he was supposed to excel at. The presence of Daeron would worsen the situation, but it might shame Aemond with him before the shining little star.
"Alright, let's warm up. Aemond, what we did yesterday. You," Ser Criston pressed the tip of his own wooden sword - a toy in the hand of a Kingsguard and the Queen's sworn protector - into Aegon's chest, “You surely remember how this goes, right? It's been some time. Mayhaps you'd like to start off with only one, my prince?"
The taste of bile continued in the back of Aegon's throat. This man might be the closest thing he had to a father, no matter how he rejected it. Ser Criston Cole was there, without his gleaming Kingsguard armor, and he spoke to him in the same holier than thou tone he would to Ser Harwin Strong.
“Breakbones.” Ser Criston's voice would drip in sharp venom. Breakbones to the man who he'd witnessed act with kindness to his little sister, who had inquired to his well being when Aegon had been hacking away at the practice dummy until splinters of his sword had embedded into his palms. Who'd pressed a cup of cold water in his hands and simply sat with him as he desperately tried to catch his breath.
Aegon felt the muscle in his jaw tense and jump, his ears burning with a feeling that he would not acknowledge. It was the wine. The hangover. Nothing more. Aegon used his left sword to knock Ser Criston's away and the man let him with a smirk.
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He should apologize.
He should ask Abby how she truly felt. He should ask her why she had gotten so upset when he laughed. He should… do a lot of things. Aemond was probably right, insufferable as always, despite his lack of understanding when it came to their sister.
Riding. He would take her riding, Aegon decided, while his man set out fresh clothes and his riding leathers. He scrubbed the sweat off the back of his neck and concocted his plan. Yes, he'd pack a basket of wine - no, cider, Abrogail preferred cider, but he preferred wine. So, a sweet wine. Yes. Perfect. There certainly would be cakes in the kitchens, and they would picnic beneath the afternoon sun in the Kingswood. By the lake, he thought, tugging the loose, bleached linen shirt over his head and shoving his legs into his trousers. Black wool for warmth and leather along the inside of the thighs for strength. The lake where they'd played as children would be perfect.
The last time, they'd played capture-the-treasure, during Rhaenyra's nameday before she'd left for Dragonstone. Helaena refused to be the princess, so Abrogail took her place and had been quite the quarry. She'd called Jace and Luke for help and he had to fight them off until Aemond and Helaena showed up.
Aegon paused as he pulled his hair back from his face. Maybe he should get her something. Girls liked trinkets and pretty things. It always excited Helaena when Aemond brought her bugs and flowers. A frustrated sigh and he grabbed his jacket. "Where's my sister and her ladies?" he asked his man, who'd been tossing the used water out the window.
"With her Grace, your mother, my prince," he said with a bow.
He winced. With his mother. Aegon wondered if he should ask if Lady Abrogail was there, but Abby was always with Helaena.
The path to his mother's room was an achingly familiar one, and the knots in his stomach were frustrating and unpleasant. Why did she have to be with his mother? She'd been angry about the fight, and Aegon had been doing his best to avoid her while Aemond sported the worst of the bruises. Laughter echoed down the hall when he made the turn towards her chambers, and he flexed his hand, wiping it along his thigh. Ridiculous. Utterly ridiculous.
"You are close enough to my size, but I do not think this suits you for a wedding," came Mother's voice, through the half-open door. Thoughtful, critical, but not bad-critical. "Turn? I don't think this shade of red goes well with you."
"The curse of red hair," was Abby's reply, light and agreeable as always. "It's a beautiful dress, your Grace, but should this not be for Helaena?"
"I don't like it," came her sister's complaint. "It feels like it wants to hook into my arms. Oh! Hello Aegon!" she called, and he realized they caught him before he could even announce his entrance.
He wondered if Helaena knew he was coming.
Mother's room was full of afternoon light streaming through the southern facing windows. Helaena sat on the couch facing towards him, running her fingers through an assortment of brightly colored ribbons in her lap. Mother stood by the window, speaking to the woman who knelt at her feet, adjusting the hem of the dress that Abby wore. She stood on the stool in front of the mirror, and from where he stood in the doorway, he had the perfect view of her reflection.
The red of her curls glowed almost as gold as Sunfyre's scales where the sun caught them unbound down her back. Abby smiled uncertainly as she gazed at her reflection, her hands on the golden dragon decorations on her shoulders. She wore a cream dress with deep Targaryen red slashes in the back of the skirt and long tapered sleeves lined in the same blood crimson.
Aegon's mouth went dry at the sight of her, and the way her eyes widened when she looked towards him over her shoulder. As his mother turned to look at him also, he tried to school his appreciating expression to one that wouldn’t get him scolded and thrown out. Abby’s face was one of surprise, his mother's expression one of exasperation.
"I…" He couldn't speak. His tongue felt heavy in his mouth and he wiped his hand on his thigh again. The twisting sensation in his gut moved lower, familiarly, and he shifted his jacket in front of him.
"Ser Criston tells me you performed well in the training yard this morning," his mother said, and the exasperation turned… into a smile. Not a large one, but a genuine smile all the same.
"Did he?" Abby asked, looking at his mother, then she positively beamed at him, which wasn’t what he expected after the way things ended in the garden a fortnight ago. "Well done! Did you use both swords today, or just the one?"
Aegon swallowed and felt the blood rush to his cock and to his cheeks. "Just the one. The one sword." Not quite a lie, as his dual swords did not last very long. Why did he sound like that? High pitched and voice cracking as if he were a kitling like Aemond. "I don't think Ser Criston wanted to face me with both, no matter how rusty I am." He cleared his throat, rocked on his feet. "Need to lull him into a false sense of security. Underestimate. Your opponent, I mean."
Helaena giggled.
Aegon's cheeks flamed hotter.
"Well," his mother stared at him, and it really did nothing to dissuade the discomfort in his trousers. "I'm very glad to hear that. Was there something you needed?"
‘Her. I need her.’ Aegon didn’t know how to voice the prayer.
"I… I was just letting… I'm going riding. On Sunfyre. I'll be back by supper." His voice didn't crack again, and he got all the words out. Huzzah.
"Oh! Abby's outgrown my old riding clothes," Helaena said with such excessive delight that Aegon wanted to throttle her. "We should also have new ones made for her. Perhaps they could match Aegon's!" His sister's bright eyes met his, and he could sense the mischief radiating off her. "You could leave your jacket, wear your spare today."
Aegon took everything back. He hated his sister.
"That's a good idea, but Aegon doesn't need to leave anything," Mother mercifully cut in. "Enjoy your riding, Aegon."
"Have a wonderful ride, Aegon," Abby echoed, averting her eyes and turning back to the mirror.
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"Are the rooms prepared for Lord Tully and his retinue?" the Queen asked Lady Fossoway, who sat across the table with parchment scattered across the blue and green tablecloth. Abrogail took her seat on the other end of the Queen's settee, the elder woman sparing her a glance and a small smile of greeting.
"Yes, your Grace. Lord Tully and the Lords Bracken and Blackwood will have rooms within the South Tower," Lady Fossoway confirmed. "Lord Vance will join them, and Ser Simon Strong will meet with their party when they reach Harrentown."
"Uncle Simon's coming?" Abrogail broke in. Lady Fossoway's green eyes flicked up to her and Abrogail felt as if she should apologize for speaking out of turn. The words caught in her throat and she broke the lady's gaze to look at the Queen, who was watching the exchange with an unreadable expression in her dark eyes. Something in it felt like a test, and so Abrogail continued. "Larys said that Uncle Simon would relay to Aegon and I about the current state of Harrenhal and where we might start."
She almost said where Aegon might start, but Abrogail understood that in running a lord's holding, both husband and wife had their duties. Queen Alicent sat on the Small Council, and she knew from stories that her own lady mother had run Harrenhal before they joined her father in the capital.
"Yes, he'll be staying with us through the tourney, so that the pair of you may be better acquainted," the Queen confirmed and Lady Fossoway's eyes averted back to the parchments. "Abrogail, I'd like you to join me in the small council as our cupbearer."
Lady Fossoway's gaze rose again, only just.
"Shouldn't…" Confusion overtook her previous uncertainty. "Shouldn't that be for Aegon, or Helaena, or even Aemond?" Or Jacaerys, she thought, but did not say.
"Aemond will also serve. The two of you will take turns, but I want you to have the experience before you leave for the Riverlands. Della, Lord Grover's maester, has requested a meeting with Grandmaester Mellos to see about the ailments he's having. Make sure he tends to him. Can't have him dying beneath our roof." Clipped tones, matter of fact, one item after another.
They passed a parchment to her, and Abrogail took it. A list of ladies and houses filled the page. Alerie Blackbar, Wylla Karstark, even Allana Tyrell and Josana Lannister. She even saw the names of the Blackwood girls as she scanned down the page. "You and Helaena will each take a Baratheon into your circles, and then between you both, you can find which of these ladies will be appropriate for your needs." The Queen continued to speak to another of her ladies who had just come in and Abrogail took a deep breath, fingers wrinkling the edges of the page.
"Aegon should do it," she said in a rush, and the gazes of the three women now gathered around her turned to look. Abby took a deep breath and licked her lips.
Marrying Aegon makes me a princess, she thought. And she wants to make him King, and I'll be his Queen.
"With respect, I am grateful for the opportunity, but Aegon should be cupbearer before we leave. It would be prudent for him to understand the workings of the council, especially since he shall be in the position of vassal in the future." Vassal to his elder sister. To speak otherwise would be treason, even among this circle.
The Queen’s large, brown eyes watched her for a long moment and Abrogail did all she could not to shrink away from it. There was something deeply unsettling about it, as if she saw something weak inside her that she wanted to sink her teeth into at worst, or at best, bat around like a lazy cat to see what Abrogail might do. The watchful gaze felt like it lasted for eternity before the Queen finally lifted a hand towards her ladies in dismissal. The women quickly moved and Lady Fossoway shut the door, leaving Abrogail with Alicent Hightower and the anxiety at speaking up threatening to suffocate her.
"You are a good girl, aren't you?" she said after a long exhale that did not quite ease the tension riddled line of her shoulders. The Queen reached out and her cool fingers tucked Abrogail's hair behind her ear. Her curls hung free down her back, a simple twist on either side of her head keeping them from getting in the way.
The Queen was beautiful, as she always was, with her auburn curls pulled back with tendrils loose around her face, untouched by gray. Beautiful, and ever melancholy. Even when she smiled, it did not wipe away the shadow that lingered along her regal features.
Abrogail would never speak it aloud, but the Queen and Aegon looked more alike every day, and it broke her heart.
She did not answer, and one did not appear to be expected of her. The knuckles of the Queen's hand traced along the curve of Abby's cheek and instinct compelled her to reach up and take the woman's hand in her own to hold. No different from what she might do with the others, even if it was stepping over a boundary that she wasn’t supposed to cross. There was pain in the woman's eyes that hurt to see, for the Queen, for Alicent Hightower, was the closest thing that Abrogail had left to a mother anymore.
An almost child she might be, but Abrogail was under no illusion that she was as important to the Queen and the Hand as if she were a true child of the crown. There was no one left for that, and so, she would do all that she could to be valuable.
"I am merely a reflection of the lessons and values you've instilled in me, your Grace," Abrogail said, fingers squeezing the Queen's hand. "I want to make you proud, and to not dishonor you, especially now that I am to be your good-daughter."
"A daughter," came the swift correction that had Abrogail looking up with surprise. "You are like one of my own children. I have watched you grow the same as them. The only difference is I don't have to worry about you the way I do them, now do I?" The Queen extracted her hand and Abrogail folded hers in her lap. "You are a wonderful influence, and I am ever grateful."
“Always smiling, it warms my heart in these trying times, a stór,” her papa would tell her when Mama was sick. Never stop.
So she didn't.
"Forgive a mother for her inclinations," the Queen continued. "I understand that the decision made has changed everything for you and it's not a simple thing. This is one of those events in our lives that we as women must endure, and we must make do." The Queen paused, looking away, and Abrogail watched the Queen's fingers twist, fingers picking at her thumbnail. “Aegon is certainly not whom you imagined. I never thought I would marry the King. I was young and thought I might marry a Tyrell, or perhaps a Tarth. Knights of flowers and charm."
Something cold settled in Abrogail's stomach. It was an unsettling and familiar sensation, one that ran through her veins when they stood as witness to Aegon's tongue lashings, the sharp crack of a hand. Sometimes there would be the thunderous threat of warning when the Lord Hand was giving it, for he would raise a hand to Aegon and Aemond both.
She'd noticed the Queen flinching during those moments, a pale look of dread on the woman's face in the presence of her father.
"My apologies, your Grace," Abrogail spoke softly, mouth turned into an uncertain, her brow furrowing. "I don't quite understand what you mean."
She wanted to hear Aegon's mother say it.
The Queen reached out to take both of her hands and held them tightly, thumbs rubbing soothing strokes along the back of Abrogail's palms. Brown eyes glistened with unshed tears, a softness to the Queen's features that reminded Abrogail of Aegon and a faint memory of her own mother.
"Aegon refuses to listen to me. He’s out of control. He is determined to flaunt every privilege granted to him, every opportunity we set before him." When the Queen took a shuddering inhale, it felt as if she was drawing the air from Abrogail's lungs to sustain herself. "He's like Rhaenyra in that way, but she was eager to serve the King on his council. Aegon, sadly, lacks the same ambition she has. Fortunately, you and I, my dearest, are very much alike. Therefore, I've asked you to serve, not him."
Abrogail's gaze followed the Queen's fingers as they held hers, unable to face the hurtful expression in her eyes. She thought of Aegon vomiting in the bushes after he dragged her from the Hand's tower. He clutched at her like demons from the hells would reach up and tear them apart. Even when he’d hurt her the way he had, unintentional as she was sure it was, Abrogail couldn’t hate him.
Slowly, she extracted her hands from the queen and leaned back to put some distance between them. Teeth caught at her lower lip as she tried to find her words.
‘I am to be his wife, and that is a sacred thing,’ she thought. It didn't matter if they were Lord and Lady, or King and Queen. They would be Aegon and Abrogail, married beneath the eyes of the Old Gods and the New, and like the example shown by the Queen, Abrogail would stand by Aegon through whatever trials awaited.
The promise was made years ago in the cold room at Driftmark, while she cut his long curls with embroidery scissors and he wept for his brother and cursed his father.
"You've watched us our whole lives. You’ve borne witness to the games we've played, the companionship and trust that we've built, and yet you feel you must apologize to me?" Her voice wavered, but her posture was strong, and she held the Queen's gaze. "I know Aegon. I've known him my whole life and while maybe we aren't as close as we once were, I know these good things are still there."
Abrogail remained steadfast and silent, hoping the Queen would understand Aegon was not a punishment. Despite everything, she knew that the kind boy she had known was still there, and she was confident that she could help him find his way back. She wouldn't have to spend her nights wondering if news of Aegon's death in Flea Bottom would reach her by morning.
"Abrogail, your heart is gentle, but your fond memories do not erase the egregious things he does now. Not his drinking, his lechery, his bad habits. But, if we work together - you, me, and your Uncle Otto? We can shape him into the king that he needs to be. That takes trust, my dear child." With each word out of the Queen's mouth, Abrogail's heart fell, and a mournful understanding took root inside her chest. "We do not leave you to handle Aegon on your own. You tell me everything, and we'll handle it. Do you understand, my sweet Abrogail?"
Did she understand everything, sweet girl that she was?
Sweet girl. Darling girl. Dearest Abrogail. Sweet Abrogail. Little Maiden Marchpane, sweet as honey, and so easily devoured.
Mo stór beag, Papa would call her, the River tongue rolling off him as easily as common. My little treasure.
The loud sound of the door opening broke the silence, boots scraping across the stone floor, and both of them jumped at the suddenness of it. Aegon entered silently, his jaw tight, lips pursed, and hair disheveled.
"Aegon," she said, her voice lilting, immediately drawing back from the Queen, feeling an easing sensation in her chest that chased away the cold. Abby smiled while the queen frowned at the intrusion.
She watched him move, glancing between them, and Abby stood up, fingers smoothing the pale blue and gold silk of her gown. She wondered if she still had to curtsey to him now that they were engaged; Aegon was apathetic about such things, while the Queen was not.
At the moment, Queen Alicent's thoughts were irrelevant to her. Despite still feeling heartsore from the morning in the gardens, Abby smiled at Aegon. It was not a bright one, but it was there all the same, and focused on him.
Aegon seemed confused, then his face softened as he searched her face for something she didn't understand. He then turned his gaze to his mother. "Abby's coming with me this afternoon," he said with no sort of greeting except the clearing of his throat. "We're going riding. We'll be back before nightfall."
The command of it all brought a flush to Abby’s cheeks, and she cast her eyes to the ground to avoid the piercing look the Queen was giving them both. It was a complicated feeling that tumbled inside of her chest; she was still hurt, though the bruise on her arm from where he’d grabbed her had faded. In truth, Abby was still sour about it all, but in the wake of the conversation and the Queen’s request, in the aftermath of her frustration and distaste for her son, and her own insistence of Aegon being given a place to serve and not her, she felt protective of him - gentled towards Aegon. And it was a feeling that was most certainly helped by the way he simply walked into his mother’s room to state "Abby’s coming with me." There was no asking for permission, nor even a greeting to his mother. She wondered if it was nerves, she wondered if he had seen something in her expression that spurred it.
Abby knew though that she didn’t have to wonder at her answer to it.
"Abrogail is assisting me with the arrangements for the tournament, Aegon. Perhaps you should find Aemond. I believe he's still training in the yard with Ser Criston," the Queen said, indulgent but firm in her tone.
Abby's mind was racing as she swallowed nervously. "Your Grace, I apologize, but Aegon and I had already planned to ride." She looked at the Queen with her eyes demure, a curtsy dropped, the lie flowing from her so easily she could not believe herself. "I’ll take the time to pry his mind for things he'd like at the feast."
As Abby moved, Aegon's gaze shifted from his mother to her, making her stomach tighten. It reminded her of the look on his face in the fountain beneath the weeping cherry tree. Her hand reached out for him and she bobbed another graceful curtsy to the Queen. "Your Grace," she murmured. It was her turn to pull him out of the suffocating room and Aegon’s huff of surprised laughter made her grin.
[Chapter Six]
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lover-also-fighter-also · 1 month ago
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THE PRINCE SWAP
CHAPTER 1 PART 3: THE UNEXPECTED GUEST
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Banner credits: @cadybear420
Links to previous chapters:
Chapter 1 part 1
Chapter 1 part 2
Tags: @cadybear420 @somerandomjewelleryonthefloor @choicesmc @choicesficwriterscreations
Summary: a rewrite of The Princess Swap, but featuring our OG: HSS MC's, Jeremy Rin (my MC) and Alan Parke (Cady's MC).
Additional Notes: DM me if you want to be tagged for regular updates
Jeremy stares at the huge palace in front of him, awestruck by its beauty. Magnificent gardens surrounded the palace, adding to its grandeur. Gardeners rushed about, tending to the flowers and the plants, and bowed to Jeremy as he passed them.
'Wow, it loos even bigger than it does from the campus.' said Jeremy, as he and Aveline walked towards the grand staircase, leading towards the huge ornate doors of the palace. 'Just wait till you see the interior.' said Aveline, as they reach the doors. A pair of guards bow to Jeremy as they open the doors for him.
'This weekend is going to be a breeze, I could get used to this treatment.' thought Jeremy, smiling to himself. But as they enter the palace, the whole place was bustling with activity, with servants rushing from place to place, adjusting the decorations and nobles squabbling with each other. Jeremy caught a few snippets of conversations as he and Aveline passed by.
'What was Ismar thinking?'
'Has anyone seen my dusting feather?'
'Put six, no eight mince pies in the oven!'
'Uhh…Aveline, you have any idea what's going on here?' asked Jeremy, turning to her.
'I have no idea. Everything was fine just this morning…', said Aveline, looking equally confused. She flags down a maid holding two different flower bouquets. 'You! What's everyone in a tizzy about?'
'The Ismari princess has just arrived!' said the maid.
'Today?' said Aveline, shocked.
Noticing Jeremy beside Aveline, the maid sweeps into a curtesy, scattering flower petals on the ground. 'Your highness, should we set out Monterrian roses, or the Ismari wildflowers for our guest?'
Jeremy was taken aback for a moment, but quickly got his confident face up. 'Set the Ismari wildflowers, it will make our guests feel at home.' said Jeremy, in a perfect imitation of Alan. The maid nodded, and scurried away.
'You handled it very well.' whispered Aveline, looking impressed. 'How did you do that?'
'Just one of my many talents.' said Jeremy, running his hand through his hair. 'But this is crazy, we should get out the way.'
'Let's get back to Alan's…sorry your chambers before anyone else comes.' whispered Aveline, and grabs his hand to take him upstairs, but their path was blocked by a noble.
'Your highness!' she said, before curtseying. 'We need your help. There's no way the palace can be ready in time for our guests. How can we avoid a diplomatic incident?' she looked really panicked. Jeremy gives a firm grip on her shoulder and speaks. 'Hey, calm down. We can't be blamed for their early arrival, so they have to deal with the best we can do.'
The Lady slightly relaxed before smiling. 'Thank you, your highness. We will just have to show them how accommodating Monterre can be.'
'Wow, at this rate, you can take over for Alan.' whispered Aveline, 'but don't tell him I said that.' she added quickly. Jeremy imitated zipping his lips. They start towards the foyer but were soon overwhelmed with a tow of servants and nobles.
'Prince Alan, what color scheme do you suggest for the third-floor room?'
'Do you suggest a dinner of shellfish or roast beef for our Ismari guests?'
'Ladies and Gentlemen, please!' shouted Aveline, trying to control the crowd. 'Let the prince review the itinerary before making a decision.'
'But-'
'Everyone, calm down!' shouted Jeremy, before catching himself, as everyone stared at him. 'Look, I know this is an unpredicted incident. But panicking is not going to make things easy. Give me some air and I will get back to all of you.' Before anyone could say anything, Jeremy runs off to the nearest opening in the hallway, and without thinking twice, rushes into it, and saw that it led to a balcony.
He took deep breaths, trying to control his heartrate, when a voice calls out to him. 'Excuse me sir, are you feeling okay?'
Jeremy looked across the balcony to find that the place was occupied by someone else, and he was spellbound by whom he saw.
She was a beautiful woman, with long blonde hair that reached her waist, and deep brown eyes, that Jeremy felt he could get lost in them. It was her voice broke him out of his trance.
'Pardon me, but it looked like you needed some help.' she said.
'Oh no! Don't mind me. I am perfectly fine.' said Jeremy, straightening himself. 'I was just passing by, and was wondering what a woman, as beautiful as you is doing all by herself here.' he said cheekily, giving her a small wink. She blushed faintly, her milky white cheeks growing a faint pink.
'Oh nothing! I was just going to head back! You see, I'm…scared of new places.' she said, embarrassed. 'But I had to come, you see. I was sent here by my father, to see the prince.'
'So, this is the princess from Ismar.' Jeremy thought privately. 'She still doesn't know I am the "prince", so let me play along for a while.'
'Oh? And what do you make of the prince?' he asked innocently, trying to make her feel at ease. 'I don't know…' she said, frowning. 'But I have heard some things about him. Not that I trust royal gossip or anything…'.
'Hey, it's okay. I am not going to judge you, Ms.-' he said, raising his hands.
'Emma.' she said, curtseying to him. Jeremy curtseyed back, before looking at her sincerely, and said 'You can tell me anything.' she looks at him, pondering whether to trust him or not.
'Well…' her voice drops in a whisper, but they were interrupted by voices coming from the other side. Jeremy noticed a tight grip on his arm, and saw that Emma was holding onto him nervously. Jeremy looked down and saw that the balcony was not too high off the ground.
'Hey.' he whispered. 'What do you say we take this conversation elsewhere. Away from the crowds?' she doesn't say anything, but slowly nods. 'Excellent.' he says and swings his legs across the balcony railing and slipped down, holding onto the vines. Emma looked at him from above. 'It's okay. Just hang on to the vines. I will catch you.' he called from below. She hesitatingly leans across the railing but does not climb down.
'Do you trust me, princess?' said Jeremy, giving her his most honest look.
Emma nodded, and swung her legs across the railing, her dress restricting free movement. She awkwardly slipped down, hanging onto the vines for dear life, and nearly lost her footing, but Jeremy caught her in his arms.
'Hi there.' he said, smiling at her.
They were not aware of how close they were, till she stepped back politely. 'Thank you for catching me.' she said.
'Right.' said Jeremy, pulling himself together. 'I think we should get going before anyone catches us here.' he said quickly, avoiding the awkward silence between them.
They quietly sneak through a set of doors into the lower floor of the palace. 'So, where are we going?' asked Emma.
'Somewhere where they cannot find us.' said Jeremy in an air of bravado, but honestly, he did not know where they were going. He was in the middle of somewhere in a place he didn't know, and on top of that he dragged a princess into an impromptu adventure with him.
They turned into a corner and thankfully, Jeremy caught the smell of freshly baked bread coming from the doors near them and Emma looked like she recognizes the place as well.
'The kitchens?' she asked confused. 'Are you sure -' she suddenly went quiet, and grabbed Jeremy's arm
'What -' said Jeremy as she pulled him into a closet. 'Shh' she whispered. Jeremy heard the voices of a couple of servants outside the closet and nodded.
They held their breaths for a few moments, until they were sure that nobody was outside. Jeremy slowly opened the closet door and stepped out; Emma followed him closely.
'That was quick.' he said. 'How did you know that they were coming?'
'Umm…' said Emma, blushing 'I don't know…it's just that I am used to avoiding people. Not that it's a useful skill…'
'Well, it certainly helped us today.' said Jeremy, giving her a sincere smile.
They continue running, till they were in a place which almost looked like a Zen Garden, right outside the doors. A small stream flowed peacefully below a bridge, which lead to a gazebo. 'Wow.' he thought but didn't let his surprise be noticed.
'It's a really beautiful place.' said Emma, taking in her surroundings. 'You really seem to know your way through the palace. Have you been here long?'
'You can say that.' said Jeremy, 'highly relieved that the wandering led to somewhere beautiful, otherwise he would have lost face in front of a princess.
'It must be nice, staying in a palace with such beautiful sceneries. My home is more like a castle.'
'Yeah, now I really appreciate the finery of the place, the company also helps.' he said pointedly looking at Emma. she gives an amused laugh. 'I'm glad I'm able to help.' she said, smiling widely.
They walk a few feet, towards a gazebo and Jeremy leaned on the railing.
'Soo. How do you feel now? A new place must be highly exhausting.' he said, trying to add his own experience with moving to Monterre and now the palace.
'A bit better actually. I'm really dreading meeting the prince.' she trails off, looking nervous.
'Oh why? Is the prince very horrible on Royal Gossip?' he asked, now curious. 'Well…' said Emma. 'I have met him only once as a kid and he was…a complete diva.'
'What?' said Jeremy, trying not to laugh.
'The prince. He has a bit of a dramatic streak.' she said, looking serious. 'Oh, what makes you say that?' he asked, making a mental note to tell Alan about this later.
'I heard he refused to wear the royal robes to a ball and threw a huge tantrum over it.' said Emma
'And that's a bad thing?' asked Jeremy. 'Maybe he wasn't comfortable with them. You know, gossips tend to exaggerate even the simplest things.'
'That's also true…' said Emma, looking thoughtful. 'Maybe I'm overthinking but he might be a little too intense, and…I don't have good experience with such people.' Jeremy looked at her sympathetically.
'Maybe he might have changed, who knows?' said Jeremy 'literally.' he thought at the back of his mind. 'I am sure if you asked him to tone it down, he would.' he continued. 'Besides, he would be a criminal if he said no to a princess the likes of you.' she laughed. It was a pleasant laugh, almost like a melody. Like an idiot, Jeremy found himself smiling at her. 'Don't worry about the prince.' he said 'I'm sure it's just gossip. You can't know a person without spending time with them.' she smiled easier.
'You know what, you're right. I won't know anything until I meet him myself.' she looked slightly more confident. 'Thank you for hearing me out. It's nice to talk to someone like this.'
'Anytime.' said Jeremy.
'Oh! Forgive my terrible manners, I haven't got your name, sir.' she said. Before Jeremy could reply, the bushes rustled, and a nobleman stepped out.
'Princess Emma, there you are!' he said. 'King Edmond is waiting for your audience.' he looks at Jeremy standing beside her and said 'Oh! I see you have already had the chance to meet Prince Alan over here.'
'What?' said Emma, shocked, looking at Jeremy. 'You're the prince?!'
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captainnait · 5 months ago
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(Decided to reuploded this post because literally no one saw it. . . Oh well. Might as well tag @whocaresifwearecrazy since they could be interested in this idk)
Something that literally no one asked for - a TTwM compilation!!
youtube
I enjoyed gathering all the questions for this one. I'm not sure if I found *all* of them, but. . . Yeah. Some clips (4 out of 13) aren't mine, so I left the source in the description.
Also I wrote a little analysis/commentary thingy for all of these, which you can read down below. It's mostly just me rambling about Bob and Milan and how stupid these two are, so don't take it too seriously. I just— I just need to get this off my chest, okay 😭 also sorry for the broken english in some of these. I was half-awake when writing lol
Anyway, would really appreciate if you watch this compilation. I might do some others in the future idk. Enjoy 💖💥
As for commentary, here it is ✨
"Ode to a Garbage Can": I put this one first in the compilation, because (imo) it shows Bob's and Milan's overall dynamic perfectly - Bob tries to be as positive and supportive of Milan as he can (although with a mild success), while Milan. . . Well, he's just being himself - extremely forward and harsh, but, in the end, not minding Bob's attitude, and even engaging in a playful back-and-forth with him. It's simple, it's nice and it's going to be a repeating pattern.
. . . Aaand it's probably the most analytical I'm going to get here. Probably.
Anyway, can't say much else about this one. They're silly
"A Crappy Question": Bob here sounds so genuinely guilty 😭. And the fact that he immediately tries to make up by helping Milan with his classes— it's pretty wholesome. . . Milan slapping the living shit out of him in the end isn't tho lol
"Get Your Finger Out of Your Nose": Milan calling out Bob on literally anything is also the main point of a lot of these. And, tbh, if I worked as a janitor somewhere, where mfs like any of ydkj hosts work, I wouldn't be so happy either bruh
Anyhow, the gross out humor in the end is nothing unusual for this game. But damn, the way Milan said "chucklehead" at the end. . . He loves that idiot I'm sorry 💥💥💥
"Urinal Chips and Dip": Bob being an idiot and getting what he deserves will NEVER not be funny to me
"Wait a minute, is this a trick question? 😠" "For you? Yes 🙄" I can't with them—
Also Milan helping Bob out a bit at the end was surprisingly nice. . . And uncommon too
"Swapping Spit": Milan calling Bob "host boy" at the start caught me off guard completely when I first heard it. And yet, somehow, he gets even more wild with the nicknames later on in the other questions lol
"Moron? Hey! >:[" Bob sounds so hurt here 😭 i like to imagine that before that he wasn't catching any insults from Milan at all up until this point. He's clueless like that
"Ugh, Milan! Why do you say things like that?" "To make you blush" Okay that's just straight up flirting—
Also Bob doesn't sound so opposed to that huh. . . Interesting. I wonder when this is going to come up again—
"Things Nobody Wants To Lick": OKAY FUCK I'M SORRY THIS ONE IS JUST INSANE. MILAN JUST CASUALLY RIPS HIS SHIRT AND SAY TO "LICK UNDERNEATH HIS SWEATY ARMPIT"? AND NOT ONLY BOB IS IMPRESSED WITH MILAN'S BODY (as he says himself), HE ALSO ISN'T OPPOSED TO HIS REQUEST IN THE END (even though it wasn't even addressed to him btw)? AND EVEN ADVICES TO SAY "THANK YOU!" AFTER THE PROCESS?? HELLO?? WHY SO 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴𝔂? WHY NO ONE TALKS ABOUT IT—
Ahem. Anyway, "Bob-friend" is such a great nickname, 10/10, amazing job, Milan.
Bob's "MILAN! WHAT? 😨😳" is literally my favorite thing ever
"Please? Look, begging is not gonna help, my friend" yup, I figured
(I'm not even going to comment on the last few lines lol this is already too much)
"Seven Minutes in the Broom Closet": And just when you think it can't get gayer than the last one. . . This title. What the fuck are they doing in the closet—
Bob mistaking alliteration with liter is just so him
"Haha, you said pee :D" this man literally has a mind/humor of a toddler
And yeah, Milan leaving Bob confused with his words/sayings is. Everything
"I'm Not Your Chew Toy": I'm pretty sure this is the shortest question in this category in terms of dialogue
I love that this one highlights just how patient can Bob be with Milan's rather snappy attitude (which, to be fair, is pretty reasonable for him to have)
"Gift Ideas from the Bathroom": This one. This is my favorite question in the whole game probably. . .
Milan calling Bob "Robert" (which continues running joke of Milan calling Bob different nicknames). Milan sharing his collection with Bob, who seems to be not only interested in it, but also wants to implement it in the question. Bob being a clumsy ass moron and dropping the jar, with Milan following with his (almost) catchphrase "I'm not cleaning that". Milan sharing his culture with Bob and feeding him a homemade soup, with Bob being absolutely joyful and excited to learn new things from his favorite person (while also being taken care of by said person). Milan's little "jerk" at the end, that sounds just a bit too soft to sound like an actual insult, and more like an affectionate pet name. I love this. This is amazing. If this isn't not one of the most wholesome moments in ydkj series, idk what is tbh
"Little Red Outhouse": "Hey Milan, how you doing? Good to see ya 😁" "It's a pleasure for you to see me 😇" "Yeah, i— Uh what? 🤨" This is one of my favorite exchanges between them. Milan has such a way with words sometimes idk. . .
Not much to say about this one, except the fact, that Milan washes Bob's microphone in the toilet bowl, becomes much more disgusting when you know, that in one of the questions Bob smooches his microphone. You're welcome 😇
"It Happens to the Best of Us": Crying Milan is the last thing I expected from this game, but here we are ig. As much as I feel sad for him, I can't deny that his crying voice is incredibly stupid (/pos)
"It was a horribly sad incident which took place today" I like how even when he's distraught he still tries to flex his english skills. What a king
The way Bob instantly goes "yes sir" right after Milan tells him to shut up is just. . . 😭 no comments
"Don't Forget to Wipe": Ah yes, the one where Milan blackmails Bob. Anyway
"Hm, would you like to know" THE WAY HE SOUNDS HERE I— 💥💥
Also the way Milan interrogates Bob here is just so funny to me. He's like an annoyed and slightly disappointed owner that find out his dog made a mess in the living room again. . . Weird comparison, but oh well (I've been writing this commentary for way to long)
"There's a Swosh™ on My Tush": I love this one. Mf just plays basketball in the middle of his work day and that's it. No disgusting twist, just basketball
. . . Well, except the last few seconds, where Bob straight up drools on Milan's shoes. . . Like a dog—
Okay, nah, that's it, that enough of these guys for me today istg
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gettinshiggywithit · 2 years ago
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!Ranpo with an s/o who prefers spicy snacks over sweets!
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Scenario:- Ranpo tries spicy snaccs!
Pairing:- Ranpo Edogawa x gn!reader
Genre:- fluff
Type:- oneshot/hc
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Honestly,one thing that brought you together was your love for snacks
Although you liked savoury and he liked sweet
It didnt really matter tho
At first~
Everyone knew that ranpo edogawa didnt share food,and they all soon learned that neither did you :’)
But the only exception to your rule seemed to be eachother
He was a bit reluctant to try your snacks,but seeing you enjoy them(the pure look of satisfaction and enjoyment on your face always made it obvious that you were eating) made him want to try them too!
So one fine day he suggested you both swap snacks
You looked at your spicy bites and then at his marshmallows,deciding it wouldn’t be the worst to switch over to sweet for a second to calm your taste buds,you agreed and the swap was made.
You started gobbling up his marshmallows and the switch from crunchy and spicy to soft and sweet definitely helped you,it almost balanced it out!(perfectly balanced;as all things should be!)
But ranpo....he was a little adamant to try yours.
Now you were the kind of person to keep eatin ur snacks even if your mouth was SCREAMING for relief.you just loved the flavour!
But um,ranpo didnt wanna go thru that so he hesitated,contemplating whether or not he should just swap back your bites for his mallows
You saw this and clarified that these one’s werent the rly spicy ones,they were mild at best.
And after hearing that he popped the first one into his mouth!
It was a stark contrast from his usual nom-ings(yes ik thats not a word it just sounded right!) but he welcomed the challenge!
After all, a master detective should be flexible,adaptable and able to withstand anything!
He took bite after bite,digging into the bag like a raccoon in a trashcan! And soon your bag was finished!
He tossed it aside and drank from his bottle of cream soda before looking back to you,who had done the same(finished the snacks i mean!)
“Soo...,” you began, “how were they??”
He thought for a second before replying, “a stark difference to be sure but a welcome one...although....i think I’ll stick to my sweets thank youuu very much~”
You laughed to yourself and shook your head
“Sure ranpo,go ahead”
And with that you each opened your next bag of snacks and dug in
While you were enjoying yours,you felt eyes watching you ,and sure enough when you looked at ranpo he was watching you.
“Want some??” You asked,shaking the bag in front of him.
He looked back to his bag,then to you,your bag and then back to his.
“Dont worry i wont take any of yours...” you said knowing he was wondering whether taking yours would mean hed have to give you some of his again.
But after Your clarification,he took a few pieces and popped em into his mouth
He uh quickly regretted not trying one first
These ones were significantly spicier than the one he’d had before and the effect it had on his tongue was causing him to chug his soda and the next one too
Soon once he felt better he cleared his throat and glared at you snack bag,clutching his to his chest and holding on for dear life
After a few seconds, he hissed out in a tone filled with the purest sense of betrayal, “NEVER AGAIN!” And then went back to practically inhaling his gummy bears
You laughed again and them resumed your snacking too, “dont worry popo,we’ll build up your spice tolerance!”
“NOOOOO THANK YOU.”
“Oh well.” You said with a shrug as you made a mental note to definitely make him build up his spice tolerance~(but not if he really doesnt wanna k?!🔪)
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please dont repost my work here as your own on any platform all rights belong to me except that of the characters used,their right belong to their respective owners.but these stories? mine.
feedback,likes,reblogs and comments are so very appreciated tbh :’)i hope you enjoyed and ill catch ya next time!
Comments & Reblogs w/ tags >>>>>>>>>>>likes please
Taglist open for anyone interested!
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tonydaddingham · 1 year ago
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Honestly? The most striking thing about the sideburns and other continuity errors isn't even how bizarre they are, how numerous or how they mostly seem like easily fixable things. It's Neil's non-answers! Except for the missing fifteen minutes in the Final Fifteen I don't believe he's outright called any of them continuity errors even when that's surely the simplest option. Of course, even odds he's doing it just to wind the fandom up, but that still leaves a fifty percent chance there might be a Reason. Or, if it is specifically to wind us up and make us chase our own tails, you could argue that makes it a red herring. In which case, what Clues are the continuity errors meant to distract us from?
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hey anon!!!✨ okay so here's where im just basically going to talk about good omens in general, both seasons, because honestly? im completely with you, and i think that rationale is bang on the money. its the whole reason why i try to look at outside, sometimes blatantly in a different direction, to what the show (ignoring the book for a hot minute) is telling us.
s2 in particular, but i'll include s1 slightly, feels like it really leans into misdirection as a narrative technique - the red herring. as you rightly pointed out, we have the baby swap/three card monte in s1. we have three cowrie shells in s2. we have the goats hidden as crows, where (by my count) you see two, possibly three, flying off in the background behind crowley. we have the three children hidden as lizards (lots of threes which is interesting but not my Point rn). the bullet catch. aziraphale distracting furfur with the envelope whilst he hides the photograph up his sleeve. probably others that ive forgotten.
so, suffice to say, it's a fairly major part of the story, and this is where i come to my point; in my opinion, tricks are being played on us as the audience, and we ourselves are being led by misdirection. now, im sure some of these may turn out to be true, but the below are a couple of examples of things from s2 specifically that have been spoonfed to us, and therefore - i think - are not 100%, if at all, true:
crowley was a high-ranking angel/archangel
maggie is a demon because she misspelt 'urgency'
the book of life is a book, and has the ability to erase existence
the 25-lazarii miracle was successful in hiding gabriel, or was as powerful as it was because aziraphale and crowley did it together simultaneously.
i've talked about all of them in various tags, so i won't go over them, but i think we need to consider that what we've been taking as read needs further evaluation. that's not to say that one or multiple could in fact be the truth - there is, after all, the actual money card in three card monte - but im hesitant to put a guess on which one is the case.
but this does kinda come back to the batshit time travel theory - does the magic trick extend that far? or, at the very least, what is the trick being played by the varying hair length/sideburns/glasses change, if we accept that they're not factors external to the narrative? if they're deliberate, in-story choices, what is it telling us? there's the speculation that the flashbacks in s2 are skewed because they're all told from aziraphale's perspective - is possibly the case for the entire season? does that explain the colour grading?
personally, i think we're seeing more red herrings than we realise!!!✨
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