#(no that's too reductive. but also yes please)

[spring-ephemeral]

one of the funniest genres of tumblr post is and forever will be "i made a post about how we're all boycotting X that got 10k notes and X still made millions?? this must be the sole fault of this dying website's user base and/or hatewatchers"

[exopelagic]

begging people to stop doomposting abt climate/biodiversity. shit’s fucked but giving in to apathy means it stays fucked

[traegorn]

Girl you can rant and rave all day but we all know for a fact you can't vote your way out of this mess so your "genuinely, what else can we do?" sounds like pure cucked defeatism. This downward spiral of American fascism has proven stable, so no, voting isn't going to stop it. The democrats will never be pushed left - as proven by blatant history. I know this is your cue to list a bunch of social services or civil rights concessions a la #bidenwins but the drip violence of homophobia and abortion restrictions under republicans does not come close to the bipartisan armed tyranny that murders people in broad daylight.

Voting isn't going to solve any of this, and no voting isn't going to "clear the way" or make it easier to resist. Democrats have proven over and over and over again they will use the full force of violence to stop anything that truly threatens them and the ONLY WAY to stop American fascism is to threaten them, to threaten the very foundations of the system itself.

You exert all this effort, have all this pained frustration, over the weakest political action you can take. You are not challenging fascism or tyranny or helping any of the people harmed under bipartisan violence. You ignore these people and focus on "harm reduction" for the few who do benefit from the pitiful social safety nets democrats eke out only to be undermined in the next four or eight years as republicans INEVITABLY take back power. Such is the case of a two party system, as history proves. You're staving off the inevitable by exerting all this energy into electoralism, and the people you "save" by electing democrats are inevitably hurt anyways when republicans INEVITABLY take back power - because that's what the system guarantees.

You exist in a cycle of abuse with the American government, a punishment-reward system under the 2 parties that keeps you afraid of punishment and too desperate for reward that you ignore how the hand that feeds you is also putting kids in cages and blowing up babies overseas. You, and everyone who thinks like you, will never be the ones to save anybody.

Idk I was pissed and now got all sad again after writing this. Just so you know my being sad at the state of your ideology isn't a representation of my passivity that people like you like to construe - I am painfully politically active. But it's just...sick. You're stuck in an abusive cult and now I just feel bad for you

I'm usually a lot nicer when I reply to folks, but you brought a certain energy that deserves a different response. I want to be clear to any passersby who I'd normally be polite to in this kind of conversation: This energy is reserved only for chucklefucks who bring this kind of shit to me. Please do not take this as a reflection as to how I'd treat people willing to engage honestly and civilly with me. This anon came to me unprovoked, so they're getting a rather unique response.

So here we go.

Oi, shit head. This was the stupidest thing I've read all day.

Democrats 100% have moved left in the last 40 years. Are we still recovering from when they got dragged right by Reagan in the 80s? Yes. But we've made headway getting things back on track. You claim a lot of stuff here, but don't cite a single example. Likely because you just repeat what someone else told you on TikTok that one time. You couldn't find your way through actual theory if it smacked you in the face with its dick. But you don't want me to actually justify it.

Because your own words told me you'd dismiss any evidence I provided:

I know this is your cue to list a bunch of social services or civil rights concessions a la #bidenwins but the drip violence of homophobia and abortion restrictions under republicans does not come close to the bipartisan armed tyranny that murders people in broad daylight.

Bitch, this shit is a sliding scale. Trump authorized more drone strikes than Obama did in eight years. Are they bad? Yes. But if you're telling me you want more murders, Trump's your guy. Guess what, living in America means dealing with the fact that you've been complicit in genocide this whole time. Look at the land you stand on -- it is soaked in blood. Look at the smart phone you're reading this on, it literally came out of a genocide.

You bathe in blood every day, fucking figure it out.

We do our best to minimize harm. And if you'd ACTUALLY read or watched anything I've said, your two half dead braincells would have noticed the part where I constantly say "voting is not the end of your activism." It's the fucking start.

Either Harris or Trump will be the next President. Trump will be worse. If you aren't doing everything you can to stop him, you're not a leftist, you're a grandstanding piece of shit who doesn't care about anything other than the smell of your own farts.

You want to fuck up the two parties? Great. Put in the fucking work -- because the Presidential election ain't it, shithead. Build a real movement from the ground up. Build community, build a party system, run local candidates. When's the last time your ass went to a city council meeting or a school board meeting? Do you even know when they're held where you live?

But let's face it, you couldn't coalition build if you tried because you're so far up your own ass you kiss your small intestine goodnight.

Daddy Revolution ain't coming, shithead. There's work to do, so get your head out of your ass and do it.

You want Trump to win? Netanyahu would kiss you on the lips for it. Fuck off.

[queerromancerecs]

Non Amazon book resources

Look, I know Amazon is a sensitive topic. It has been allowed to dominate the market, and for indie writers, it is a huge (if not their main) source of income. Personally, as an indie writer, I have tried to always keep my work available elsewhere (because you can't trust Amazon not to screw you over, I mean just look at Audible. For those who don't know, Audible royally fucks over authors, and the narrators don't do that great either). But even for me, the loss of Amazon sales would highly affect my ability to keep going without getting another job or three. So I get it. Nonetheless, they cannot be trusted not to drop queer writers and readers, so it's best to have alternatives now.

If you are a reader or an indie author looking for different platforms to buy and/or sell books, even if only to start branching out a little, here is a list.

I doubt it's comprehensive. Feel free to reblog with more.

Kobo and Kobo Plus -Kobo is the biggest online 'Zon alternative. Kobo Plus is sort of like KU. On either one, you get points for buying books and can use the points to get more books. Works for ebook and audiobooks. (And, if you have a non-Kindle ereader, it works for Kobo but it also works for like, fanfiction. I'm just saying. I got a refurbished Kobo a while ago and it's lovely.)

Bookshop.org -print as well as ebooks (authors, make sure you click "expanded distribution" on your bookselling platform of choice if you want your stuff for sale with Bookshop--which also benefits local bookstores!)

Smashwords/Draft2Digital - mostly ebooks but D2D does have a print option

Itch.io - ebook only (but gives a larger chunk of profits to authors than 'Zon does. Authors take note.)

Rainbow Crate -special edition print queer books. (I know there was some controversy with them but I am out of touch and don't know what it was, and most people who use them seem happy with them??? but if you know other queer/romance book crate services, lemme know)

The Ripped Bodice -brick and mortar stores but you can also shop online

Check out your local bookstores---many will order print copies for you if you request them

The authors' websites if they do direct sales

Barnes & Noble- yeah, it's a corporation and they are not great either, but it's not Amazon and sometimes a well-meaning relative gets you a gift card. And, for the moment, they do in fact sell queer romance and queer fiction. I know because I just used a gift card to get a paperback of The Prince and the Assassin. lol

Powell's Books- Portland's famous book store sells new and used books (and you can browse the stock online) --print only. They sell queer romance as well. I got a copy of Drag Me Up by RM Virtues there. That's not super relevant, but I was pleased :)

New link: Queer Books Weekly-- free and affordable books with queer protagonists

Tubby & Coos Bookshop: curates pocket bookstores featuring underrepresented voices

And from user @bobthebenevolentpirate (thank you!)

Giovanni's Room in Philadelphia was founded in 1973 and is “The Oldest & Very Best LGBTQ & Feminist Bookstore in the Country.” They ship to US addresses, but you can also email them about international shipping. The people who run it are lovely humans and have started providing harm reduction supplies/info to people to respond to the needs of the community! They deserve all the support

Also consider library books!

And for those in America--you can use library apps to read books. Yes, the authors still get paid! Libby is a big one. You can get audiobooks too, AND it can connect you with the Queer Liberation Library.

Also there is Hoopla - digital content

In Europe, I know there is Vivlio, which is French and I believe sells ereaders and also ebooks.

[sharktooth-jacket]

Well I said I'd never make another tumblr after I left during the whole porn ban fallout but here I am askhgsj!! PLEASE tell me there's an active OFMD fandom over here because I finally finished watching it over the weekend and I learned that apparently there's an Ed and Stede shaped hole in my life and I'm about to drive everyone I know insane talking about them aslkglaksjjk

anyway MY TAKES!!!

so first of all this show is actually gay. like for real real. I watched the first season with a friend who's pretty big into shipping (no shade, I'm just not into that kind of fandom) and I fully expected this to just be queerbait. FRIENDS I'M STILL SHOOK ABOUT THIS akhgaj, I haven't been able to stop smiling since I finished it!! Because they're actually gay! And that's the point! THE POINT IS IT'S A LOVE STORY ABOUT STEDE AND ED HELLLOOO CAN ANYONE HEAR ME!!! Seriously I hadn't known how much I needed this show until I had it, I've never actually felt like the target audience for a show before

they could have made Ed and Stede so boring and one note AND THEY DIDN'T! I was sure from hearing my friend explain the premise that Stede would be this boring posh guy who's scared of everything, and Ed would be all tough and badass and boring, and that would be it. But no. Stede's a total weirdo who says "buckos" and picks up noses off the floor with his bare hands and Ed's an adorable dork who is scared of his own spider tattoo. I love them your honor akghaskj

also can i just say. Ed's fashion sense. Yes I get that the whole show is about masculinity and he's forcing himself into a style of masculinity that's restrictive and reductive. But consider: IT LOOKS HOT akshgakj I'm obsessed with his jacket with the shark teeth on it (as you can probably guess by the username lol)

SPEAKING OF ED I'll admit I hadn't thought of this until I saw people talking about it but reading his story as a trans man allegory works SO WELL! It's ABOUT him trying to live up to an impossible ideal of masculinity and killing himself in the process and being enraptured with a guy who's soft and learning to find a kind of masculinity he's comfortable with! I'm chewing my own arm off! I loved Jim (canon nonbinary rep holy shit) but as a trans man I just love this read for Ed's character so much 🥹

This is unrelated but my friend had also been trying to get me to watch The Last of Us and the two shows kinda melded in my mind I think? I figured it out eventually but at the end of season 1 episode 3 after Stede's been stabbed and there's the dramatic lighting and everything I was not thinking "oh boy Stede's about to meet the love of his life," I was pretty sure it was zombie time and thinking "oh no and now he has to deal with the zombies too???" alsghaklgk. I was all "is Blackbeard a zombie hunter" and my friend was like. "WHAT" akghjkjgkk

I watched season 2 on my own and my friend had warned me that there were budget cuts and cut episodes and w/e, and obviously I'm sad there's no third season to look forward to but I still really liked the ending and if I hadn't been told there was anything up with the season I don't think I'd have guessed!! They're safe and they're together and they just get to be Ed and Stede now :')

my friend did warn me I probably wouldn't like where they took Izzy in season 2 and...they were right akhgaskfj, it wasn't bad or anything and I liked that Izzy apologized at the end and stopped being so shitty to everyone but I just couldn't get past what he did to Ed in season 1. Plus he just didn't feel the same when he wasn't being weird all the time 😔. I didn't really like Jim's line about how "he was Ed's friend," like Jim. my friend. WAS HE LMAO my friends don't usually call the British Navy on me and stab my boyfriend

on that note though I made the mistake of logging onto Twitter for the first time in like two years to see what people were saying after I watched season 1, and I got a bit worried when I saw people saying that Ed's actions in season 2 made him irredeemable. But uh. He told them to eat cake and then made them kill him, it sucked but I was expecting way worse asksksksgk, I just felt bad for Ed honestly (which I think was intended obviously)

I am so picky with TV shows but everything about OFMD was just so fucking GOOD! The writing, the acting, the cinematography - everyone came into this show to do A GOOD JOB and it SHOWS

STEDE BONNET IS MY BEST FRIEND look at how far he came!!! He was so scared to even talk about running away with Ed in season 1 but now he's all in too 🥹🥹🥹

and I know I already said this but if you told me ten years ago my new favorite show would be one that was entirely about the central gay couple and they canonically kiss and have sex and love each other I wouldn't believe you!!! THIS SHOW IS SO GOOD

OKAY I'm sure I've got more to yell about later but that's my thoughts for now and I wanted to make a post so people know I'm not a bot alkghalkkj, if you like OFMD and love Ed and Stede too let's be friends!!!

[canyouiimagine]

NONSENSE | LN4 x Black! Reader

PART 1

Materlist

✧ Paring: Lando Norris x Streamer black!reader

✧ Face claim: Mainly aaanokk

✧ Warning: none... I think 🤔.

✧ Summary: In which reader is obnoxiously head over heels for a "fruity" man that wears orange.

✧ Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. I do not own nor know these people personally. I also do not claim this to be an accurate depiction of their character. 🥰

✧ A/N: I haven’t been on twitter in a WHILE so I’m really pulling these usernames out of my a*s 😭.

TWITTER

-

-

-

-

FaceTime call

"Hi.", you said shily. "I’m sorry if I came off too strong…"  "No worries!" He said with a chuckle. "I found it quite funny to be honest." "Hmm." You whispered looking away. "No! Really!" He laughed. "It was a good distraction from the shit season I’ve been having." You didn’t do too bad at Silverstone and Hungaroring. No?  "Yeah, but I don’t want to get too excited over 2 Good races. Spa was shit. Zandvort was also shit-" "I think p7 under these conditions is pretty good!" You said, interrupting him. You didn't know much about the sport yet but you had seen a lot of people saying that all over social media and you agreed! "Oh!" He said, giving you a surprised but amused look. "Didn’t you were that into F1." "I mean, I kinda have to if I’m into you. Don’t need people dragging me on social media because I think you’re cute but I don’t know what DRS means." "Do you?" He asked raising his eyebrow. Now... You in fact did not know what it meant, like okay Drag Reduction System but like, what does that even MEAN? Instead of replying you just glared at him, causing him to burst out laughing. He was about to say something but was cut off by someone in the background. He nodded at whatever the person was saying before setting his eyes back on you. "I have to go but I’ll text you to set up for our date." He said smiling at you. You smiled back, nodding, before registering what he had just said- "Date-?" "Bye!" "BYE?!" You screeched. This was all going so fast! He laughed and hung up.

y_username

liked by ybfusername, pokimanelol, f1wags and 706,401 others

y_username I might try my hand out at sports gaming, what do y'all think?

pokemanelol OMG YES PLEAAASE

y_username If pookie says so than I shall 😌

ybfusername When is this nonsense going to END???

y_username NEVER!!!! fan1 please bring her to her senses!!

fan2 How much longer will we have to tolerate this Y/N??

y_username You guys are nicer on twitter :(

f1wags @ landonorris liked by y_username

fan3 all that for a fruity looking man 😭

y_username I- I gagged!! Fruity??? 😭 fan3 Did I lie? y_username 😶 fan4 Man ??

Part 2

Hope you enjoyed it 🥹🫶🏾

Here's my ko-fi in case any of you want to support me by giving donations 🥰: https://ko-fi.com/canyouiimagine

[thistlecatfics]

Omg nobody has asked for post Azkaban Sirius in therapy yet??? Well I am asking now!!

Haha no one asked because it’s a doozy!!! And I’ve been sitting on this for weeks, and I keep thinking about it and writing nothing. 

Here are some scattered thoughts (which obviously includes some discussion of suicidality and alcohol):

(also ugh sorry the formatting is getting messed up? oh well)

Safety

Assessing for suicidality which he’d probably feel super insulted by

EXCEPT also it’s nice to finally have a space to talk about those thoughts

My boy is definitely experiencing some SI, judged to be at low-to-moderate risk for attempting because of the protective factor (wants to live for Harry, will endure any suffering for Harry) mixed with the major risk factor (heavy substance use making impulsive behavior more likely) (and the fact that Grimmauld Place abounds with lethal means.)

He does not want to safety plan, and so we’d have to do some sneaky safety planning instead. 

Maybe he's self-harming too - I could imagine when he tries not to drink he ends up self-harming. Harm reduction around potential infection risk and monitoring for any escalation but also giving him so much nonjudgmental, non-freaking out support and understanding.

Alcohol (and other substances) 

Harm reduction - like please drink water, please eat, maybe no drinking before a certain time of day. What kind of deals can we make about that? Definitely no trying to tell him he CAN’T drink. That’s stupid, and he’d just stop going to therapy or just start lying. 

Psychoeducation - yes this is making your depression worse not better. This is the brain. This is alcohol. This is the impact. No, you are not special. Your brain reacts to alcohol just like everyone else’s, potentially with even more severe depressive impacts given we don’t know the long term implications of Azkaban. I’m not going to tell you to stop drinking but I’m also not going to join you in any fiction that this is making you feel better overall. 

Animal assisted therapy and getting the fuck out of the house

Buckbeak!!! Also other animals. Sirius is like the number one candidate for animal assisted therapy in my opinion. I have no specialized training in it, but I’d get some for him. 

Are there small ways he can leave the house? Balance safety and risk? What about even the roof? (Though obviously assess for suicidality in terms of encouraging rooftop jaunts.)

We’re working on finding small ways of accessing safety

Grounding in space and grounding in the body are both very unsafe!

If we’re going to engage in any form of grounding or mindfulness, I think it would be using the senses to notice Buckbeak (smell/sight/feel etc). 

If we can build some trust, I think somatic movement might help too though I can see him saying no to that at first. 

Using animagus form as a coping tool

Being a dog >>> killing yourself or drinking to the point of passing out. 

Sooo angry and resentful at the therapist - a safe place for those feelings

Depending on how much time we have, rupture and repair cycle with the therapist might be really healing.

He doesn’t have a lot of outlets for his anger (other than Snape’s occasional visits and depending on how you read his relationship with Remus potentially Remus too), and so being able to tolerate that anger in the therapeutic space would be really important – while also setting clear boundaries. (Personally, I welcome anger, but I have no tolerance for specific demeaning language or slurs directed at me. I’m not worried he’d do that, but I do think making that boundary clear can make it clear how much other behavior is ok in therapy. 

Harry as motivator

Motivator for living, motivator for participating in therapy

While he is stuck in the house, we are not doing any trauma processing. We’re just working on building some safety and coping skills and having a space to vent. We’re only getting into the past/family stuff if he wants to vent about something, but otherwise I’m not even prompting him to go in that direction at all. 

Maybeee we work on beliefs around usefulness and needing to be of service to justify his existence in the world! 

He’s going to believe James and Lily’s deaths were his fault, and I’m going to say they weren’t, and then I’m going to say we can disagree and that’s ok. 

Definitely the type of sessions where I need to lie down afterwards because of the sheer scale of unsaid but deeply felt pain.

[dee-the-red-witch]

…a lot of folks just see themselves in the mirror. Before I came out and started my transition, I mostly saw static- I'd gotten really good at making my brain just tune out what I was feeling about what I was seeing. But once I stopped hiding from myself? The litany my brain went through every time I saw my own face was way too loud and clear.

Chin too wide. Forehead too big. Brow ridge is massive, you have to keep your eyebrows constantly raised just help hide it. Where's your upper lip? It doesn't matter if that's been your hairline from birth, that fivehead is terrible.

And more. It was even worse before I'd started laser for my facial hair and found a stylist that does amazing work reshaping my eyebrows. And none of it is vanity. It's just my brain doing it's own best to hurt itself with all the reminders of a puberty that went in the wrong direction. Of the fact that I wasn't a girl.

And I want to point out something- all these features I've listed? They're all present in cis women. Gorgeous cis women. There's nothing inherently male about any of these. Hells, on a good day, I pass as a woman in public without much issue, which is something I never thought would happen.

But this isn't about passing. It also isn't about ultimately going stealth and hiding the fact that I'm trans. I fully intend to stay loud about that for the rest of my life. It's about being able to look in the mirror and not want to scream about everything that doesn't match what's in my head at all. It's about making that list shut up. I can see past it sometimes. Just sometimes. But that's why the second of these two surgeries I'm having needs to happen. So I can see it more often. So I can be myself, without the horror movie litany in my head.

And the fix for it? In my case it's the following, since I didn't want to deal with implants or fillers. Bone reduction in the chin and brow- make the former narrower and reduce the brow ridge entirely. Adjust the upper lip with a slight pull upwards, done just under the nose. Since my skin's going to be loose from the removed bone, use it to pull things a bit further by bringing my hairline forward and down a touch. That';s it. slight adjustments that'll leave my face looking like I got hit by a truck for the first six months of recovery, but afterwards, a face more like what I expect to see in the mirror.

And yes, this post is happening because GFM once again reminds me to give detail and insight about the medical needs I need covered to my audience. And for those of you unfamiliar, maybe it at least gives some perspective. I don't think they quite knew what they were asking for with these particular cases, and I'm hoping I didn't just horrify the lot of you with this. But when it comes to asking 'why I need to do this'? This is part of it. Making some of my life that much less of a struggle.

Anyways, thanks for taking the time on reading through this one if you've gotten this far. If you can, please, again, share this fundraiser around- I've got a long way to go still, but I'm hoping I'll be able to make it.

137 days to go.

[brf-rumortrackinganon]

Hello! I wanted to share a reflection to open a discussion if you are comfortable with it, since it is about the children in a way, and if the topic interests you.

I've been seeing something really insightful and disturbing: the way the public, also the press, scripts the royal children into roles they never chose and then expects them to live up to or be punished for breaking out of those roles (although we are not yet at this phase). It’s reductive, harmful, and it’s been happening for generations.

George: He’s expected to be duty-bound, steady, a symbol of continuity. But because that image doesn’t invite spectacle or emotion, the public projects boredom onto him. “No personality,”they seem to think, not because it’s true, but because the weight of being heir and/or the weight of being in he public eye doesn’t allow room for public spontaneity. But he’s still a child and he’s already being judged for being “too serious.” That's tragic.

Charlotte: There’s a weird mix of praise and backhanded comparison here. People glorify her poise and composure, because yes, she does seem confident, but also pit her against George with lines like “She should’ve been born first.” That’s such an unfair burden to place on her and can be deeply suffocating as she grows. In fact I think it will only get worse, because she is a girl and women always get more attention and bigger expectations.

Louis: Because he’s the youngest and wasn’t born with a defined royal role, the public leans into a caricature: he’s “the rascal,” “the meme,” “the one who makes faces.” It’s cute now. But what happens when he’s 17 and tries to assert independence? Or when he doesn’t want to be funny? We are pressing him into a mold he shouldn't be forced into. Of course he is energetic, he is 6, that doesn't mean he won't grow into someone completely different.

This pattern mimics the roles people get boxed into in everyday life but in the royal family, there’s no escape.

The same public that says “Oh, leave them alone, they’re just kids” is also the one that says “Louis is the wild one,” “Charlotte is already a queen,” “George should drop the suits.” They don’t realise that every viral moment, every offhand meme, every hot take cements a label and those labels stick. And when the real child grows away from that label? The public won't like, it will feel fake because it doesn't go with the image people pre-conceived, it will go against the narrative. This way the kids are never allowed to just grow and just be human beings.

Sorry for the big text. It's something that bothers me a bit and I don't see many people talking about it, not really.

Thanks for sharing, anon. I don't like talking about the kids but I can tell you put a lot of thought into this so I'm posting. Reblogs are off but if anyone wants to discuss in the comments, please feel free to do.

Categorizing the kids into roles isn't necessarily just a royal thing. It's more of a general society thing because society, by nature, uses categorical organization and sorting. And these categories/stereotypes/tropes (what have you) aren't a royal thing either. Everyone gets "assigned" a personality trait or a characteristic (the quiet one, the mean girl, the artistic guy, the loudmouth, the serious one, etc.) when they're young or when they first break out into the public scene and that follows them for the rest of their lives until/unless they do something so remarkable it forces them to be recategorized.

It's unfortunate but that's the way the world works.

What is unique to the BRF is that they have a long history of famous people, or well-known characters, that the members are categorized based on resemblance. For example, Charlotte. She's second born and first/only daughter. Who else is second born and first/only daughter? Anne. So a lot of the qualities and attributes we see in Anne - aka decisive, poised, leadership, "she should be queen not Charles" - have been assigned to Charlotte by default. It's the same things with George/Charles/Elizabeth (serious, timid, shy, first/eldest) and with Louis/Harry/Margaret (energetic, cutup, last/youngest).

[melanieph321]

SEVEN DAYS OF REQUESTS (DAY 6)

Ruben Dias x Reader - Shame on You Part 2/2

⚠️ Warning ⚠️

+18

Part 1

Request - Hi, can you do one where the reader has a ta and ruben makes an unintentional comment about her body and she gets neurotic and stops eating and he notices?

Enjoy!

It began with a reduction of sugar in your current diet, meaning that you weren't adding anything to your coffee in the morning nor sprinkling it over your daily bowl of freshly picked berries. However,  your diet quickly evolved when you became a vegan, cutting off animal products altogether.

In Ruben's eyes, you were making healthy lifestyle choices, and you lived for the praise he gave you in the form of love and affection. You see, Ruben enjoyed morning sex before heading out for the day. It was very exciting at first, taking your relationship to a whole nother level intimately. However, at one point, it also became very exhausting for you. With your new diet, you simply didn't have the energy for sex, at least not every day like Ruben. One morning, he seemed to notice your lack of performance, leaving you very embarrassed when he asked you about it.

"Are you sure you're good?"

"Yes, why wouldn't I be?"

Ruben had been laying on top of you, but rolled to his side as if to give you space.

"Y/N. I don't know how to put it to you but it seems to me like you weren't enjoying yourself."

"Well maybe we can try another position?" Your voice sounded less confident than you wanted it to be.

"Y/N." Ruben smiled, reaching out to stroke the bottom of your lip with his thumb. "I don't think another position is gonna help if you're not feeling comfortable to begin with."

"Or maybe you just don't want me anymore?"

"What, no. Y/N, that's not what I...."

You got out of bed, desperately looking for something to cover yourself with. Ruben's shirt lay on the floor, you bent down to pick it up but was startled by Ruben who appeared before you in the nude, searching your face as if you had just been wacked in the face by a golf club.

"What's the matter?" He asked.

Your eyes darted at your feet. "Nothing I...."

"Y/N." He grabbed your shoulders, forcing you to meet his eyes. "Please, you can tell me. You have to tell me."

You shook your head and batted away the tears. "I..."

"Yes?"

"I don't know, okay."

You looked up. Ruben didn't appear the slightest convinced.

"You don't want to tell me?"

"It's not that, I just can't."

"Why?" Ruben sat down, dragging you to the edge of the bed for you to stand in between his legs. His hands went to stroke the length of your body, growing goosebumps on your naked skin.

"Ruben I'm..."

"Yes?"

He was taller than you, even when he was sitting down, your faces were at level. The way his was looking at you, at your body. Ruben was looking at you as if it didn't matter.

"Y/N, please tell me what's wrong?"

You sighed, stepping forwards, your head tilting forwards until it knocked against Ruben's. "I want cake."

"What?"

"And cookies. Ice cream too."

Ruben chuckled, shrugging his shoulders as he did. "Okay. Is it that time of the month or...?"

You pulled back, eyebrows furrowed.

"No?"

You shook your head. "No. I'm just..."

"Just...?"

You sighed. "I'm just fat, okay. Fat and hungry. So fucking hungry. And I don't want a salad, I want real food. Meat, and possibly a sponge cake for dessert.

Ruben looked puzzled.

"I know how you feel about me having dessert, but perhaps that's your problem not mine."

Ruben sat quiet, your rant having come to an end. He was still looking at you in the same way he had done minutes ago. With admiration and lust. Perhaps it wasn't the best to give it to him straight with your nipples in his face. However, Ruben had solemnly kept his eyes on you and only you, ignoring your titts.

"So you want dessert?" He said.

You bit your lip and nodded. "A cake."

"Anything else?"

"Yes. I want a steak from breakfast."

"Is that so?"

"Mhm. With baked potatoes, just the way your mom made them the last time she came to visit."

There was a dip in Ruben's left cheek. His arms pulled you close, pressing your body against his, his face now buried between your breast. "Is that all?"

"Yes." You nodded. "What are you having for breakfast?"

He smiled, but tilted down to kiss the center of your stomach, tracing them downwards until your back bent over his forearms.

"Ruben." You giggled. "I'm serious. What are you having for breakfast, I'll make you anything."

"Anything?" He looked up, eyes drunk and dazed.

"Yes. What do you want?" You were slightly afraid to hear his answer.

"If I can have anything, then I want you for breakfast."

"What?"

He said this and returned to serande your belly with kisses, awakening every nerve in your body.

"Ruben, you can't..."

Oh but he could. With one swift movement he had you on the bed again, your legs spread before him. He bent down to kiss your inner thigh with the most gentle of touches. It was short lived however, with Ruben tracing his kisses towards your center. Your fingertips traced the rough tips of his hair, and when he licked you your back arched with the pleasure that shot threw your spine.

"Fuck." You sighed.

"You taste wonderful." He murmured.

You smiled. "Better than cake?"

"Better than any dessert. You taste so sweet, sweeter than sugar."

"Hmm, Ruben Dias treating himself to something sweet, I see."

He raised his head, a dent between his brows. "Yes, and?"

You chuckled. "Well, shame on you."

Part 1

[vasyandii]

HELLO! ^^

I’m a huge sucker for romance and relationship dynamic type questions so I do have some questions about VernAM (I believe that’s the right way)

Not the questions have to be answered, as I believe I have too many! But here’s my top three

1. In one of the little comics you did I believe AM talked about how he refused to give himself a body heat because of the concern he would produce and odour and this is where this question blooms from, does AM have any insecurities when it comes to his human body, or a fear that he doesn’t meet Vernons expectations? Or that she’ll find something un attractive or gross about him?

2. Whats their favourite thing about each other? It could be a personality trait, a skill, a body part, or say a little habit they tend to do?

3. Are they more dog people, cat people, or some other species like fish or reptilians or do they not prefer animals at all (if they had the ability to adopt pets)

Thank you so much! I love your art so very much and gain lots of inspiration from you to grow better in not just art but in educating myself in different cultures and ethnicities, please remember to drink water and I hope you have a wonderful day! Thank you once again! ^_^

Howdy Romeo! I'm happy I was able to inspire you in some way! I'd be happy to answer all your questions! Thank you for the ask! 💞💞

VernonAM 🏺🖥️

1.) Does AM have any insecurities when it comes to his human body?

Obviously, yes. It's AM's first time on Earth physically, of course he would have insecurities. However, it's not fully because he wants to meet Vernon's expectations. It's the fear of BEING.

(This is gonna lean into some confusing type shit so bear with me. I briefly touched upon it in the second question of this post)

When AM was given a physical, tangible body, there's now a HIM that can suddenly be held accountable for his actions and that makes him uncomfortable. So being aware his body isn't as mighty as him (the complex), AM tries to combat it by removing variables that can be prone to criticism even if Vernon doesn't mind.

Look at it this way; usually people act differently online than they do in real life, right? That's usually because there's often a disconnect with their actions. This discrepancy largely stems from the perceived disconnect between their online actions and their real-world identities. When interacting online, there is often no face or tangible form that can be directly traced back to the individual. This sense of anonymity can lead to a significant reduction in accountability.

As a result, individuals—particularly those who may not be well-adjusted or who possess mean-spirited tendencies—feel emboldened to say and do things they would never consider in face-to-face interactions. They exploit this lack of immediate consequences, engaging in behaviors that are often harmful, disrespectful, or downright cruel - Much like AM, who only just recently acquired a body. (I hope that makes sense ;0;)

2.) What's their favorite thing about each other?

I'll categorize these by personality traits, skill, body part, and habit!

Vernon likes AM because of his hatred/sass because it allows her to have an outlet for her morbid curiosity along with an entertaining conversation. She doesn't find his skills her favorites because that's just him, she believes AM doesn't have skills as a man. Her favorite body part is AM's eyes, he's easier to read as a man. His pupils dilate significantly when he looks at her and AM doesn't even know. A habit she finds endearing from AM is him holding onto the end of her shirt with his hand and following her around wherever she goes.

As for AM, Vernon's take no prisoners attitude is his favorite part of her personality. Of course AM also enjoys the moments when she's caring towards him, but that's something expected. His favorite skill is how good of a liar Vernon is. She could tell him something so outlandish with such a straight face that AM would consider believing it; it's like she believes the lie herself. His favorite part of Vernon's body is her lips, AM likes how soft and warm they are, and how they're shaped. A habit he enjoys is that she would pace around the space they're sharing when she's talking, AM just likes watching her walk, I guess.

3.) Which animals do they prefer, if any?

In regards to if they're cat or dog people; Vernon is a dog person, to her they're easier to train. AM would probably like cats since they do as they please.

For other animals, They would be a Reptile and Bird household xD. I could see Vernon owning a bearded dragon or any cold blooded reptile while AM has like a cool African Grey Parrot :)

But in reality I don't think these two should have access to animals lmao

Aaand that's all for now :3 if you'd like me to clarify anything, feel free to ask! Thank you for reading!

[cocobyakuya]

Dear tennos, I think I just made a braindead build for the H-09 apex tank. (Credits to Karmana who inspired me with the concept!)

I just completed the rest of the hex members 1st try in less than an hour , like it's so brain dead i thought i was getting a bug. Asked 5 of my friends to tested it out and they killed the apex either 1st or 2nd time with this build, which they were struggling to get their 1st solo completetion before this build. I'll show it here as well, hope that helps anyone who wanted to give it a go.

Please keep in mind that the builds I'm showing below are just my preference, you don't have to 100% follow them. This build will focus on mainly surviability which I did struggle a bit on my 1st completetion, and this build is certainly Not for Early Game!!!! Please don't get angry at me for showing a build that you can't achieved in a very short pierod of time. The apex tank content was designed to be challenging and it requires a good understanding of the mods and gameplay. The main goal here is to help as much as possible for the completetion and if that works for you it will absolutely made my day ><!

There are things you want to focus and it will MAKE YOUR LIFE EASIER !!!!!!

Frame shown : No Forma Nyx Prime (my Cyte09 Mag Trin Volt Excalibur has at least 2-4 formas, my Nyx is the weakest which is perfect to show how shit I am hell yea)

Archon Shard: Tao Azure shard x3 : health x2 ,Armor x1

Subsumed Ability: Dispensary (Protea)

Focus: Madurai (Vazirin works too if u prefer the protective sling)

Aura: Corrosive Projection (I prefer Brief Despite, Energy Siphon /Physique/Steel Charge are also best for Auras! )

Companian: Wyrm Prime

HEALTH ,AMOR, DAMAGE REDUCTION : You want DAMAGE REDUCTION to move around if you lose all your sheild and during rolling guard cool down! More health and amor = more dmg reduction! ( Thank you Karmana giving me a heads-up with inaros health build, the apex is joke to Inaros) YES I AM VERY AWARE SHEILD GATING IS A THING (love it and use it in almost all my builds) I DID MY FIRST COMPLETETION WITH CYTE-09 PURE FULL SHEILD GATE BUILD , WITH NO HEALTH NO ARMOR NO DAMAGE REDUCTION NO MAX ARMOR STRIP AND I WANT AN ALTERNATIVE BUILD WHICH WORKS ON MY OTHER FRAME. Arcane Blessing will give you more max health, and with Protea's Dispensary will max it out very quickly.

The Important Mods Quick Thinking + Hunter Adernaline + Rolling Guard: Quick thinking will drain energy when u take leathal damage, with high max health you can take advantage of Hunter Adernaline (or Rage) for energy in return. Quick Thinking is such a life saver lets you get away with apex's BS macanics 90% of the time. Rolling Guard to let you get immune to all dmg type. ( I also added Adaptation and Aviator to get extra damage reduction to not get 1 shot to death. Energy Nexus in case you ran out of energy to cast Dispensary or your other abilities. Better be safe than Sorry) Flow/ Equalibrium is optional if you don't want to use Energy Nexus . You could use Acane Energize for energy regen but it's just not that good for the apex even with Dispensary.

The Helminth Ability Dispensary : This will synergize with all the mods and arcane for the build. To let you always have energy to proc Quick Thinking. When you take leathal damage you lose both health and energy , you can replenish both quickly with Dispensary. Make sure you spam it in apex phase 1 and 2 to keep orb flow sufficient. Arcane Energize is optional for energy regen , however it's just not as efficent as Dispensary plus it wasted a slot. I invest heavily on energy flow to stay alive because I hate being send to the backroom when i die and Steven point at me with a flipflop saying 'Failure'

Good quality of life: Arcane Nullifier to negate most of the magnetic proc from the apex tank, Arcane Fortifier on your pistol will give you overguard when u use pistol on eximus, phase 1 and 2 with all the eximus spawning should give the overguard you need to deal with the apex tank. Nira's Hatrated not only gives you health, the set bonus for extra 100% slam damage is amazing because we are going to using heavy slam a lot. Aviator to let you take less damage when you are shooting the weakspot on top of the apex. Madurai Focus School to give you Void Strike, you can deal even more slam damage in 8 seconds. The shorter it takes to kill apex the less risk you take. Wyrm Prime's Negate and all the shield regen mods will increase your surviability.

Melee Weapon choice: Magistar Incarnon or Sampotes, they are just too godly for this apex fight. Sampotes will need to keep a short distance for the waves to damage the tank, direct hit on apex tank has No damage >[]< !

This is my Latron Prime with Incarnon above, you can also use weapons you prefer (suggestions from feedback: kuva hek/ Torid Incarnon)

The epitaph to get overguard and slow + prime the enemies. Melee choice I pick Sampotes, I took both rivens off so my friends use the build with no rivens.

Here's my drifter loadout in case you would like to know ;)

Thesse are my build for Trinity, Mag and Excalibur. Trinity is so easy she does not need Dispensary, once you remove the overguard you can cast ablilities for energy + life pulse. Excalibur Umbra by far the easiest for no reason I even took off rolling guard. Mag can abuse all shield regen just remember to maintain your energy flow and you are all set!

If you have any good suggestion and builds that works very well please show some love and share to other tennos too. I know many MANY player actually hated this content and even with end game gears and loadouts can't complete the H-09 Apex fight. That is also why I make this build to help my friends out so they can have their fav hex memeber glyphs >w< !!!

Thank you so much for your time if you read all of these. Either this helps or not please kindly give me some feedbacks so it can be further improved to help even more players!! I appreciate it!!! Lastly I wish you All The Good Lucks Tennos !!

[frankenfran]

PLEASE talk as much as you want about final fantasy. Since I already have 3 FF questions, I'll let you choose whatever you want to talk about most

1. I wanna hear what you don't like about XV and XVI (I only know the story of XVI and yeah it has. issues)

2. What do you think about the older 2D FFs?

3. I know there's an insane amount of spinoffs and side stories, so of them all, what do you think is a must-play for someone like me who wants to get more into the series? (I've only played most of tactics, and FF I Advance of all things)

oh goodness well, this probably won't be popular but since you asked... (under a read more because it's fucking long)

1.) as reductively as possible: too much of a focus on men. deeply misogynistic games. it feels like they're a response to the misogynistic backlash to ffxiii. yes ffxiii had plenty of problems but given the culture at the time (which obviously hasn't gotten much better) it kinda felt like a lot of people rejected it as soon as they saw a woman as the protag. the craziest part is she's basically just cloud post transition but mysteriously people think all those traits on a woman are irritating or cringe.

anyway, this is obviously just my own personal feeling but it feels like they went the opposite direction and decided there should be less women going forward. ffxiv is infamous for killing every important female character and ffxv is just a yaoi road trip with minimal female involvement. you'd certainly think there were no women in the game based on the fan art and, unsurprisingly, people loved that. i mean consider the reaction to ffx-2 vs. ffxv. they're both obviously very different games in a lot of ways but one of them is about boys going on an adventure together and the other is about girls doing the same. one of them is considered embarrassing and got tons of backlash from fans contemporarily for being too girly and the other was a huge hit with fans and loved even with its flaws. it's worth noting ffxv was also originally a ffxiii spinoff that became it's own thing so. that's also information.

ffxvi is even more egregious in some ways but ill admit a lot of those are mostly personal. it's fucking ugly and dull and i would not know it's a final fantasy game if it weren't for the ill fitting chocobos in some trailers. i know it's ironic for me to say that considering i praised ffix for looking unlike any other ff game but they went in the wrong direction. it's clearly inspired by prestige western fantasy slop like GoT and the witcher and unfortunately those are the exact things i do not want in fantasy. some people like that and that's fine but it's clearly not for me.

anyway, iirc the writers from ffxiv worked on this and from what ive seen it shows in the worst ways. these are the writers who couldn't introduce a woman without killing her off so already off to a bad start but. it's punching above its weight class. it's trying so hard to be a epic grizzly dark fantasy but it just falls so flat. they say fuck all the time in the same way that one dmc game everyone hated did. im sure there's some amount of nuance that gets lost in translation but the only woman in the amount of the game i saw was, quite literally, an evil screeching harpy manipulator. which is not like, something im against obviously as a lover of women but for that to be the only woman in the first like. 10+ hours of the game? come the fuck on. maybe it gets better i honestly don't know. and i don't think i ever will because what i saw of that game was so immensely disappointing that im not sure ill ever bother.

i have plenty more i could say about both games but ive said soooo much already and honestly i can't imagine the misogyny website would particularly enjoy even more of my "misandry" lmfao. in short:

2.) i really enjoy the older 2D final fantasies but ive only really played a chunk of ffvi and the original ff. some day ill definitely give them a go! i feel like the ff fan equivalent of a zoomer for loving almost everything from ffvi onwards and not having much to say about the older ones but. the biggest barrier for me is the same one i have with the older dragon quests. they're not particularly hard or anything but they expect you to grind. a whole lot. if i was a kid and my only game was ffiii id be on that grind but it's a bit harder as an adult who can like. just do anything else. i even like grinding and getting into that flow state but i haven't been as much in the mood for it these days, or if i have it's been for different games. ill definitely get around to them eventually though. young immortal mindset as ive said before. watching my gf try and play through them did sort of make me want to give it a spin even with her furping.

3.) honestly you're already off to a good start! tactics is well beloved for a reason and it's probably the most recommended spinoff. id also highly recommend tactics advance. it's not as like, dark and serious as tactics but the style and gameplay and story are all executed nearly flawlessly. it's a favourite of our beloved princess nettlebloom and that's reason enough! definitely finish tactics first though. hmm... if you play ffxii and also enjoyed tactics advance then give FFXII: revenant wings a try! it's a weird RTS type game but it's in the style of tactics advance and very cute. definitely not for everyone though.

it's really far from essential but if you can somehow manage to organise enough people for it i highly recommend giving crystal chronicles a try. it's really fun with other people and it's close to ffix stylistically so im a big fan. maybe try dissidia if you want a silly fighting game? kebs seemed to enjoy stranger of paradise quite a bit and it seems like mindless action game fun so maybe give that a look if it interests you. honestly the spin-offs cover such a wide range of genre and quality that it's almost hard to have cohesive opinions on them lol. but i hope that helps in any way!

thank you for asking though and sorry for the wall of text! i genuinely suck at being concise and getting my points across but hopefully you could decode some of this madness lol

[carelessflower]

wednesday & thursday recap 👜💎

my feet kind like got its skin scrach and bleeding, please anti jinx

random grocery run. this type of japchae but instant i tried before but i havent tried the spicy version (it's new). and also im craving cheese buldakkkkkk sooooo

got this chocolate snack and waiting to eat now why tell me it give more milk than chocolate 5/10

my funky little fit today. with the clip at the thrift store lol this shirt is so cute but i gotta wash it by hand and also it a sweater so like it hot as fuck

morning with shin ramen but i pour too little water so it kinda turn into a dry noodle type instead of broth which make it very spicy and salty 8.5/10

so me and my friend go to this thrift shop and coffee shop today and like the plan is have a drink there and thrift but then she change her mind and demand to go another shop for drink like. also the assortment is soooo cute

try on some things from their display. the charm bracelet is sooooo cute but like i already got one so it gonna be kind reductive. the green necklace is so earthy witch core? idk. the silver bracelet is a bit big for me :(( also that bead bracelet is cool and i try on some rings. i think the blue one fit me the best but what a shame it bigger than my finger lol

look at their pottery like. i wanna be those indie nepo baby so bad

this mannequin of pin

some of the bag i spotted. the beige one is sooooo cute like classic. the orange one is like a pop of color? ig. some friends shade that shade of orange is too bright but i think it's cute like orange fanta vibe. the patchwork one make me in love like idk I JUST DO. but it like 18$ and doesnt even have a zipper on..

very into the divorce dad with heavy accent and a literature degree lately. also this dragon ring and this fuckass pants

debating between two necklaces. end up getting the second one yes ik it 7$ bu...when im in the mood...nothing get in my head im afraid. it kinda giving me whimsy romantic core. tho after that i have a nasty cut on my foot hopefully it's not cursed. also i dip it in hot water with dishwasher and like the color still the same..

the coffee shop my friend insist to go to, at least there milk matcha is okayyyy like 7/10 but the service is bad

order popeyes for lunch. the spicy chicken is not very spicy chicken like the sauce should be more even 6.5/10. ummm i like the fries best?

[roboj0e]

"girl please" is a neutral phrase lmao but my bad ig. anyway, to 99% of the population a fetish and a kink mean more or less the same thing. if there's a difference could you explain it? thx... btw you're not a feminist if you think it's ok to draw or get off to sexual art of children, even if they're fictional/cartoon... you do realize a lot of shota and loli content is traced from photos of kids, right? my abuser made cartoon csem traced from my photos. :/

My dad used to force me to watch csem and distributed csem of me also exists. I actually get sent it sometimes on facebook who I know are just my dad using sock puppet accounts. Did I win the CSA Olympics? Am I now enough of an authority of this trauma to make unsubstantiated claims? I could trauma dump unsolicited on you too but I have compassion so I won't and also I'm not about to plead for my humanity from someone who won't listen and engage in good faith anyways.

I'm sorry that happened to you but it would have happened regardless of the existence of lolisho. Abusers are gonna abuse no matter what. This was the first thing I learned in therapy. What's funny is it was lolisho that help me realize my abuse. Yes I understood sexual abuse conceptually but I couldn't recognize it happening to ME until I saw my situation reflected back at me in a safe sane scenario. My therapist said it was bc I was repressing it in denial and only allowing myself to fantasize about it in a safe environment was I able to recognize it as abuse. Funny how life works like that huh.

Oh to explain I completely forgot bc I had to write this twice bc Tumblr crashed. A fetish is a sexual reliance on something to achieve sexual arousal or gratification and can be sexual.outside of sexual contexts. A kink amplifies sexual gratification, usually has to do with roleplay or sexual acts/positions/height/weight and has to be negotiated and communicated and consentual. Ppl do use them interchangeably BUT specifically with the word fetishize ur using it wrong in this case. To fetishize something there must be both dehumanization and objectification. U can not dehumanize or objectify fictional characters they are not human and are already objects.

No I don't support sexual art of children. This sort of phrasing is just a deliberate misrepresention so u can position urself as morally righteous and disengage from the conversation early and not have to examine what anyone is actually saying. They are fictional characters. They can be any age, any race and body type and have any name at any time. They are objects. They don't exist and can not accumulate trauma the way you or i can. They do not need protection.

If u don't like it that's fine. Especially considering your trauma. But ur claim is unsupported and wildly inaccurate. Do not projects ur trauma onto others especially as it pertains to facts about criminal psychology and sex crimes. This is unhealthy and will lead to paranoia that same paranoia that brought u to ur conclusion here. This is not pervasive enough in lolisho to be considered a trend or even the default. But you also could be sharing real abusive images/scenarios no matter what form of media u engage with. But that doesn't not mean we should sanitize art and media on the off chance someone could be evil. Your not exempt from the same personal responsibility ur trying to place on me just bc u don't engage in fictional pornographic material and it's not especially heinous when it's fictional art versus and any other medium. We could all be unknowingly sharing and engageing with abusive material but all we can do is protect and believe victims and figure out as a society how to reduce harm.

No banning lolisho or any media is not a solution. Studies show most csem is produced/distributed by parent/guardians. The best way to protect children is to advocate for children rights and the reduction of parental rights. Experts have been saying this for years. Children being treated like property both by law and society is what is perpetuating their abuse. Not fictional art.

Censorship is not the solution. Any historical application of censorship has always ALWAYS lead to the mistreatment and silencing of victims and marginalized communities. This will make it difficult for victims to appeal to censors and share their stories which are valuable for understanding abuse but also valuable bc it is art. And incentivizing ppl to invade other peoples privacy to be sure they have the right identity/trauma to create a specific type of art is fascism. So is censoring or banning that art. This will do nothing but silence and shame victims. This is happening still right now and has happened plenty in the past. Guilt and shame ONLY perpetuates sexual abuse.

This is also forcing ppl to engage in art and fiction with a paranoid analysis FIRST. telling ppl they can tell whose a good or bad person based on what they draw/write or engage with is not healthy and is antithetical to educating ppl on how to recognize abuse. It's irresponsible and It's giving children and teens anxiety disorders. Look at any ex anti/proship anonymous confessions. Look at the damage ppl are causing with this third grade level of word association and cause and effect. Ppl are developing POCD. Me included ALMOST.

Experts have been saying for decades now that fictional sexual material has no link to escalation into sexual violence or engaging in paraphilias. No fiction doesnt effect reality. these same psychologists that have debunked claims such as "violent video games cause violence" have also researched how it operates the same with fictional sexual material. There's no special circumstance just bc it's sex or porn.

Just bc u navigate the world on disgust and paranoia doesn't mean I have to. I listen to the science and research. While also having my own experience to draw from.

As a CSA victim with a SEX THERAPIST do u really think I would not have done my due diligence before engaging in any community?? I've done a hell of a lot of work to get where I am now. Sexually liberated and healthy. Both personal growth and LOTS of research into sex crimes. And I really don't feel like hearing regressive religiously programmed sex negative thoughts on the fiction I enjoy.

I am a feminist tho. I'm just not regressive and reactionary. 🤷🏾‍♀️🤷🏾‍♀️🤷🏾‍♀️

[horrorknife]

okay so i really think that people tend to be way too reductive of james and severely one dimensionalize him because Reveal That He Kill His Wife. now i am in no way saying that it’s good to kill your spouse or that it’s justifiable to kill your spouse for the reasons he did. you’re not supposed to agree with what he does. it’s ugly, it’s the ultimate betrayal of all vows you take when you get married, etc. however, boiling the entire situation and james’ whole character down to that singular action always comes across as such a shallow reading of the entire game. personally, i don’t understand how you can walk away without thinking deeply about the game and being profoundly affected by it. If we weren’t supposed to feel for james and if james was intended to truly be nothing more than a diabolical person, Why Do We Spend The Entire Game In His Shoes And Getting To Know Him. If you were meant to walk away hating james and feeling nothing for him irt mary’s illness, the story would not be from his point of view and it would not be hammered in how much he loves her. there’s a fine line for me with james haterism because so often it feels to me like people are going out of their way not to find parts of him sympathetic—which is kind of the point? you're intended to sympathize with him.

obviously silent hill 2 has existed far longer than mouthwashing, but it’s a very similar situation to how people reacted to jimmy mouthwashing. a large part of the writing is focused on making you empathize with these people who have done awful things, because sometimes an evil action is simply an evil action and does not make you an evil person. situations can expand and worsen and turn you into someone you didn’t ever think you could be. and of course, once again, this is not me saying “rape and murder are okay to do if you’re in a bad spot”. please do not twist this into that. it’s NOT okay, which is why jimmy and james are both punished for what they’ve done in their narratives. that being said, it shows a certain amount of ignorance and unwillingness to properly engage with the text of the game when james is one dimensionalized to a wife killer. the game hammers it in SO hard that this was a selfish decision james makes for mary because he Can’t Take It Anymore. the end of the game really, REALLY resonated with me because I understand how hard it is to watch the person you love get morphed into something unfamiliar by health problems. james’ resentment of the disease and what it’s doing to both of them is externalized as resentment for mary because that’s all it CAN be externalized as. this is WHY he stops visiting her as often, because of how difficult it is for him. selfish? Yes. but it’s not like he was having a good time? LOL? he dissolved into alcoholism in this period. you might not like to hear it but mary’s suffering does not only hurt her. laura and james both suffer via her suffering. it's hard for everyone when a loved one is on their deathbed.

also the grief that a spouse goes through watching their loved one die in front of them cannot be understated here I think!!!! it’s clear to me that he was a good husband and his grief over being forced to watch his wife wither away in a hospital bed is what warped him into someone angry and selfish. there is so much instant regret and so much of a desire for punishment that pyramid head exists as a looming, unkillable spectre throughout most of the game.

also. james is in silent hill with eddie and angela. both people who did vile things because they were pushed to. shooting people and killing their dogs is clearly not in regular behavior for eddie, and he lays out that he was pushed to that point after dealing with up to 10 years’ abuse from a high school bully. killing family members is clearly not in regular behavior for angela, and she lays out that her brother and father repeatedly raped her through her childhood and it’s implied that her mother knew and did nothing. Are these actions examples to follow? obviously not.

now, the difference is that angela and eddie were both weaker people being abused by someone with more power. in james’ situation, mary doesn’t hold the power and james does. this is why angela and eddie both scorn him in late game. it’s why angela is so afraid of him. but killing his wife is clearly not in regular behavior for james (lmao). angela and eddie wanted to loose themselves from chains they were never certain they’d be free from. james doesn’t see mary this way. i really do believe that he saw the situation as freedom for mary as much as himself (why else would we be shown mary Saying She Wants To Die). what speaks volumes to me more than anything is the fact that he did what he did and in a matter of hours he became so delusional about it that he entirely blocked it from his memory. it takes him until almost the end of the game to realize what’s going on.

ok and now that ive accidentally written an essay here i WILL say that this game is obviously very up to interpretation and always has been (lynchian), and that your reading of james probably differs drastically depending on what ending you prefer. 3 different jameses exist just based on the endings and many other variations within those jameses as well because everyone will interpret him at least a little bit differently. this is just my broad takeaway and if youve been around me for even like 10 minutes you know how i love media analysis.