#(it’s fabio.) or diggia actually but

[moonshynecybin]

in the absence of vale who in the grid is the best at eating pussy. i dare to ask

[winterisol]

guys ive been drown in work, stressing over uni and i return to motogp only for diggia to immediately injury himself???? I hate it here the world is out to get me or something

[topnotchquark]

Joining the war against the vr46 racing team livery on the side of vr46 racing team livery

[motocorsas]

motogp as restaurant staff

management:

valentino: the kind of owner that likes to occasionally show up just to sit in his office in the back and pretend to do paperwork while gossiping with managers about hiring decisions

aleix: kitchen manager (used to work the grill)

dovi: used to be assistant/hiring manager but quit </3. still shows up to chat and have a beer sometimes and ppl are always trying to give him free stuff but he's too humble

dani: used to be front of house manager. had a secret tryst with lorenzo that the entire restaurant found out about and resulted in a slow motion mega-breakup and they both got fired

lorenzo: used to be kitchen manager (see above)

marc: neurotic lead server/front of house manager who is always stressed about something but customers love him. threatens to quit all the time

front of house:

pecco: the actual best server but is always getting shit bc vale (a "family friend" who is basically his father) got him the job

joan: server who disappears for 15-30 minute increments to go have mini breakdowns

fabio: server who shows up for opening shift & everyone saw him partying on instagram last night but he doesn't seem hungover so he keeps getting scheduled for it anyway even though it is secretly killing him

bezz: server who is super popular with costumers but forgets orders more than anyone

luca: host who can do no wrong

enea: host who is ALWAYS getting shit from the servers for overseating their section but he doesn't care

maverick: lead bartender who knows how to work basically every station in the kitchen

jack: second bartender/barback who really wants to learn grill but aleix won't promote him bc he knows jack and maverick used to have a thing when they were literal teenagers & he's obsessed with playing with his coworkers like dolls. he doesn't even rly want them to get back together he just wants to see how long this weird animosity will go on for

back of house:

taka: easily the best cook but is never scheduled for more than 2 or 3 days per week. no one has any idea what his main job is, but if he's this good at his side hustle, it's gotta be something insane

morb: cook (can work grill & saute interchangeably) who never shows up on time and never answers texts but basically can't be fired because he's one of the best cooks, always helps clean and never calls out

jorge: grill cook who everyone thinks might actually be dating aleix since they go for breaks together all the time but aleix for sure has a wife and children... everyone's gathered around the backdoor listening to them chat outside trying to deduce whether or not adultery is occurring

brad: actual best grill cook and Good Bloke

alex rins: salads & cold apps. bc he's vegetarian. always shows up early to chat with aleix and stays late to help clean up but no one ever hears from him on days he's not scheduled. always claims he's hanging out with aleix and jorge but cannot substantiate it

alex marquez: king of expo who is the only one sending orders out on time. if marc is running an order they will always whisper with each other... who knows what they're discussing

diggia: dishwasher extraordinaire who desperately wants to work literally any other station

oliveira: meal prep. runs the walk-in like he was born in it and has the best gossip about everyone

zarco: butcher (derogatory)

spanish rookies (raul, augusto, pedro): the busboy brigade and ALWAYS scurrying around and it's unclear whether they like each other or if they've turned bussing into some sort of competition

[formulapookie]

Diggianini 60

60. Truth serum/spell

He doesn't know precisely when it started, if this morning or yesterday already when he told his physiotherapist his shoulder hurt so much he barely could eat with that arm at lunch, all he knows is that this is really fucked up.

He cannot help but tell the truth, compulsively, repeatedly, about everything. He looked online for it, fearing a tumor or something similar, a problem with his brain maybe, neurons not acting properly.

Google told him there was a condition like his caused by a truth serum, the one you usually see in spy movies like James Bond, and he never actually thought those were real.

He read it can be contained in certain types of medicines and painkillers, and started reading through the impressively long list, it's always cited as a side effect, who even reads those, they're like Terms and Conditions that appear when you download an app on your phone. The serum is in two of the four painkillers he's prescribed, a rate of manifestation in the patient rated 1.5/1000, what a fucking joke really.

"Fuck"

In his job, lying is important, whenever they ask him about the shoulder, or the feelings after a race, he mostly lies, if he ever got the truth out it would be terrible for his PR image.

He quickly gets to the track, and starts walking around once he's inside his motorhome, pacing in weirdly shaped circles.

He wonders wether or not he should inform the PR team, Uccio maybe even, to ensure he's excluded from media questions until the effects die down.

Eventually he calls his PR manager, quickly explains the situation, and he assures him they'll take preventive measures to protect him from eventual mediatic disasters.

The one thing, or rather, person he didn't hold into count when thinking of his situation is Enea.

Him and Enea they have a kind of arrangement, a strange one, made back in Moto3, strengthened in Moto2 when they were teammates. The agreement is simple, the two of them fuck, but since it's only between them and only after races it's not a gay thing to do, they're just guys releasing adrenaline.

And it's been fine for years now, none of them ever rethinking about it, wanting to change something in the dynamic.

Well. Ok no that's a lie. Diggia wants to, has been wanting to do it for a long time now. He wants to be able to stay after they finish fucking, wants to hold Enea close in his arms, kiss him gently, stroke his hair as he falls asleep, breathe in his perfume when they lay side by side.

And of course he never told him that, Enea wouldn't like it, he's sure of it, whenever Diggia tries to go for a kiss after Enea jerks away, if he's too gentle while they have sex Enea will do something to get him to be rough, Enea never stays, Enea never lets him stay.

But - now what if they do this and then he speaks up? Would he tell people? Would he tell the media?

He'll have to avoid him. At any cost he'll have to avoid him. Or it's gonna go to shit.

•••

The race is over, Bez finished just ahead of him, he feels the arm hurting, he'll need more painkillers now, and Enea, he won.

He smiles absentmindedly when he sees the result of the Sprint race, he's happy for him. He'd be happier if it was him instead of Martin on the second step of the podium alongside Enea but he's happy like this too.

Seeing Enea smile it's worth staying a bit more in front of the TV screen in the garage than he should.

He gets cleared of media, declared "unavailable" for non-specified reasons.

He rests in his motorhome, when there's a knock on the door, and he goes to open it, thinking it's Uccio.

But when he opens it a strong smell of champagne hits him, the bright smile of his friend blinding him.

"Can I come in?" "Yeah"

Dammit, he should've said no. But he can't lie.

"You showered already Fabio? Could've waited for me" "Wanted to" "Oh you wanted to?" "Yeah"

Fuckfuckfuck stop please stop asking me these questions shut up shut up

He is clearly about to ask why but Diggia offers him a can of monster, which Enea refuses, smiling once again.

Diggia can't help but look at him, his soft features, soft lips, soft hair, soft skin, all remind him of the warm sensation he feels every time they fuck, when Enea is riding him and he's trying to slow down the pace a bit just to enjoy it for longer, or when Enea has his back against the mattress and keeps chanting his name, and Diggia wishes he could kiss the sound coming out of his lips instead of biting at his collarbone with force

"Well that's a shame now, but I won no? Don't I deserve a little celebration?" "Yeah you do" "Choose, you can decide-" "Vojo succhiarte il cazzo" (I wanna suck your dick)

Which gets Enea a bit incredule, because Diggia never sucked his dick, if not once while drunk, so it doesn't count. Because Diggia always (if not once, drunk there too) topped, and had Enea suck his dick not the opposite.

"Ok nice, let's get to the bedroom then"

And Diggia doesn't know how to react, he really does want to suck him off, but also only did it once, what if he's not good at it? He's had girls being bad at blowjobs, it really kills your libido.

His thoughts are shut off when he sees Enea taking off his leathers completely, he's wearing the white undersuit that makes Diggia go absolutely crazy, il clings to every muscle of his upper body, especially his pecs and biceps, and Diggia can't help but stare at the scene, because Enea looks simply perfect.

He checked, the truth serum makes it impossible to lie in general, wether to other people or to the affected individual itself. So each and every thought he's having is real, true, undeniably his.

He takes off his shorts, because God forbid he wears a shirt when he's in his motorhome, and he's left in boxers, the bulge visible already, while Enea is just wearing boxers and his damn white undersuit.

He wants to bite his tongue, to shut up before causing damages, but he's not quick enough.

"Leave the undersuit on, it's hot" fuck stupid ass idiot you're a dickhead

"Didn't take you for that type of things but yeah, as you wish Fabio"

Enea sits on the edge of the bed, he's clearly hard already, grey boxers doing nothing to hide it. And Diggia would stand there staring, but the need to make him feel good is stronger, and he quickly gets on his knees, tugging down Enea's boxers, who bites his lip and gets a hand in Diggia's hair.

Enea is bigger than him, not by far, but he's still longer, so his first attempts at swallowing him don't go too far, but nonetheless he manages to get more than half of his cock in his mouth, moving with a rhythmic pace and humming when near the base.

"You should do this more often you know Fabio? I bet you'd be able to take me whole after a few tries, you're so good already"

He fucking moans at the praise, causing Enea to buck his hips and make him choke. He lets go of his cock to cough, then gets back to working Enea up, using his hand to cover the part he can't yet reach with his mouth. Enea feels even bigger, his throat clenching around him, and the older is fucking loving it

Once Diggia resumes his pace is really not long before Enea needs to cum, and since the other today seems pretty up to doing thing he usually does, he forces him to let go, tilting his head back.

"I'm gonna cum on your face ok? You like that fabio" "Yes yes please do it" "You're so fucking needy today, open your mouth"

Diggia complies, opening up and taking his tongue out, and three seconds later he can taste the bitter taste of cum on his tongue, drops falling on his lips and cheeks as well, as Enea throws his head back moaning.

Diggia swallows everything, licking his lips and before he can do it Enea collects all that's left with his thumb, then presents it to Diggia, that sucks it clean making Enea moan again.

Now Diggia is really fucking hard, he needs to fuck Enea right now.

"On. Get on the bed Fabio, no don't worry about the lube, I prepped myself before coming here, figured it'd be better, right?"

And Diggia would normally say yes, it's better like this, but this fucking truth serum doesn't let him lie. Not in the slightest.

"Could've done it myself, I like watching you when I open you up" "Ah really? Well next time I promise you will ok?" "Ok" "Now get on with hit and fuck me"

Diggia doesn't wait, immediately taking off his boxers, squirts some lube on it and strokes his dick a few times. He didn't lie, he can't, about the under suit, but when he fucks him he wants to be able to leave marks, bites, hickeys, bruises all over his torso, hand-shaped bruises on Enea's hips looking sinfully attractive.

"Take - the undersuit I wanna see you without it, please"

Enea has never seen this side of Diggia, he sounds almost pathetic. God it's hot. He doesn't answer, just gets naked completely, laying down on the bed as Diggia parts his legs to get comfortable between them. He hooks one leg over his shoulder and pushes his cock inside, it goes without resistance, and it already has him moaning.

"Come on" "Yeah yeah ok"

The pace he sets is rude and quick from the start, Enea sounding so angelic already, he wants to kiss him, god he wants to kiss him and never stop doing it, he wants to make him his in every way, mark not only his chest, that can be easily covered, but his neck too, so high it can't be hidden, but displayed for the world to see.

"Fuck Fabio there, again, there please god yes like that"

He hits his prostate, again and again and again, moaning in his ear and panting hot air on his neck, wishing he could just sink his teeth there, in the invitingly soft flesh.

"Enea you're so good fuck I can't - I dreamt of doing this last night" "Mh don't stop, tell me that again" "You feel perfect around me I swear, every time we fuck I want it to last longer, want to keep you here in my bed forever"

It's all Enea needs to cum, hard and fast all over the sheets, moaning Diggia's name and clenching around his cock.

One, two, three, four thrusts and Diggia is coming too, and he's too close to Enea's ear, too taken from the moment, too fucking earnest.

"I love you"

He doesn't even realize it until he's filling Enea up, what he said can't be taken back, he's coming inside him and just told Enea the three words he swore to himself he's never tell him.

Fuck nononono he's gonna leave he'sgonnaleavehe'sgonnahateme he's never gonna look at me in the eyes again

Diggia pulls out in fear, staining the sheets, Enea turns around, half shock half surprise written on his face.

"Sorry sorry Bestia fuck" "No Diggia wait you said-" "C'ho sta roba che devo di per forza a verità e che me sta a fa impazzire, non posso mentirte Enea, non ce riesco, io me so innamorato de te e non so che cazzo fa"

They're still naked and panting from their orgasms, Diggia not looking at Enea in the eyes, too scared and disgusted with himself. Not being able to lie to himself comes with accepting the fact he does like guys, a lot, maybe even more than girls. And it's scary.

"C'ho paura Enea, che mo so frocio e te me odi e non me vuoi più vedere perché te faccio schifo" "Diggia" "Don't hate me please, don't hate me" "Fabio, look at me"

He does, because he's basically being forced to do it. Enea taking his face between his hands and looking at him with - softness?

"Fabio are you serious about the truth thing? You are not lying?" "No, it's like a serum or some shit in one of my painkillers" "Ok. I trust you. Now, can you say that again?" "What again?" "Tell me the truth, how you feel about me" "I love you" "Again" "I love you"

Enea kisses him, and it's not one of their usual rushed and bruising kisses, it's gentle, caring, slow.

"You. Fabio you have no idea how fucking long I wanted to hear these words coming from you" "What do you mean? You were the one who said no staying over, or no kissing unless we're fucking, or no -" "I was scared you idiot. Scared you'd hate me"

Diggia wants to punch himself in the face right now.

"No no no Enea I could never hate you no, I love you, have loved you for a long time now, I want to be with you, properly, want to kiss you and hold you after we have sex, and stay over"

Enea smiles again, and to Diggia it's perfection again, perfection made human, hopefully made his.

"I'll stay then, as long as you want, I'm not going anywhere, I love you Fabio, I'm so glad that stupid serum got you to tell the truth" "Me too"

They kiss again, and it feels like two puzzle pieces fitting together after being apart in a box full of extra pieces, trying to find each other.

Put That Guy in a SituationTM Ask Game/Prompt!

[42bakery]

So Franco is saying that riding for Vr46 would be like closing a circle (and of course Valentino will keep the seat for him), and there have been rumors that Diggia has chosen to stay with Vr46 (usually reliable source). Uccio said that they really want to keep Diggia and also that next year they’ll have one GP25 and one GP24 and that Ducati will only produce three GP25. So this would mean that Fermin will ride alongside Alex in Gresini for next year even if Gresini isn’t the factory supported team

Hi there anon 👋👋👋👋

I think I agree with you, but I also don't trust Ducati at all.

For me it was a given that Franky was going to go to VR466 once Pramac was going to Yamaha. There's no way in hell Vale will let Franky go back to Yamaha after the way he went out. Or the lack of relationship with Fabio or the way Franco pestered Yamaha or the way he showed how much he didn't want to be there. So Franky to Yamaha was a no go. I don't think Yamaha would have proved it either. I know that Pramac now has the control on who they put in the bikes, but usually satellite talks with the factories, so Yamaha would say they don't approve.

Now Diggia to stay in the VR46 makes sense, because it gives the team some stability. They don't need 2 riders to get used to the team, they just have one. Also because Diggia was hand picked by Ducati to be there, and it's probably the reason that VR46 is getting the 3rd GP25. Now I don't know how far the negotiations are, because I think Ducati was involved last time and this time is just Uccio, Pablo, Diggia and the manager, so no Ducati banking there. I also read that Diggia would like a role on development/close to the factory, and I don't know how much Ducati will let him, so the Yamaha is still an option. And Fabio said it himself, he has more than 1 option (3 in fact, one which we don't know anything).

Now about Fermín, if the above is true, then yes, he's going to the Gresini team, but I do remember Pablo Nieto, VR46 team manager, say that they actually want Fermín. And this is not something new, last year they pushed, hard, very hard and got cockblocked by Ducati and Luca Boscoscuro. Nieto also said and they won't make the decision until the break. Also he's not the one who will decide, nor Uccio, it's Vale the one who has the last word in this so who knows. Fermín said he doesn't care between Gresini or VR46, but he likes/feels like VR46 is his home (it was in Assen) (Also ironic he said that when he's a Marc fan, but whatever)

Now lets go to the bike. That is a freaking mess. At first it was said Fermín would have the GP2024 and the GP26 for 2026 year, then in COTA Fermín was told by Ducati he was going to get the GP2025. I do believe him because Ducati is tricky and likes to play mind games with all their riders, and if the said 'we only have 4 one one is for the rookie' they could make riders panic and rush the decision for shitty/bad/worse conditions. But here comes Marc, who by not playing the game, he screwed Ducati, so they don't have that leverage card, or that pressure anymore. There's no official satellite team, and no team has the GP25 exclusivity any more. So the GP2025 is for the one with better negotiation skills or the one who plays Ducati game the be Fermst.

So I've been hearing that Fermín's contract with Ducati is 1st year a bike to Ducati's discretion and the 2nd one with the official bike. I do remember reading at first that for the 2025 season it was going to be the GP24, and maybe they aim to give him the GP2024 as it was first planned. But then again, they can use Fermín as leverage with other teams, like if you keep him and assume his salary, you get the GP25 bike, which is something I think Ducati is capable of doing.

And the last part, about Gresini not being factory supported is not actually true. Ducati has his own engineers there, and they do treat their satellite teams ferly okay, and if Fermín goes there and the team doesn't get the GP25 I think they will demand more support to level up the field with VR46.

Now this is personal, and people might not agree with me, not I have anything to back this, but I don't understand why Fermín is not getting the GP25. I know he's a rookie, well other rookies had gone to Pramac and got the factory bike (Bagnaia and Martín). I also feel it odd because he will get the GP24 but then move to the GP26, so either Ducati already know that the GP25 is not going to be a good bike or suit him, or they want to screw him. I mean I already know they have screwed him because:

a) 2 + 2 year deal, which probably says he can move to the Factory in 2027, but then Ducati won't honour it because that is what they told Martín, and look where he is.

b) He's a Ducati rider and Ducati is already saying they won't pay him. They literally said that they will only pay 2 riders, and Fermín has a contract with Ducati Corse, so whose paying those 300.000 euros? (Probably more due to the pole, podiums and win bonuses they get, but still).

c) It's Ducati. it's in their nature to be an ass to their riders (points at Casey, Andrea, Jorge, Andrea again, Danilo, Miller, Enea, Martín, Zarco).

For me it's also difficult to see why if Fermín is going to Gresini the GP25 goes to VR46. Fermín is getting the official bike next year, so wouldn't it make sense for him to go to the 'official' satellite/the satellite with the official bike? But as I say this is just personal

Do I agree with you? Yes, but until everything is closed, I won't trust anyone because we are talking about Ducati

[batsplat]

you don’t need to answer top2 if you wish but how do you think the championship standings will look like next year? besides the obvious stuff, i’m v excited to see what diggia has in store + bezz going up against martin + acosta (and ktm as a whole really) + the rookies!!

now see usually i'm a coward with this stuff and wait until pre-season's done to do predictions for the season, both championship order and rider market. this approach is a good idea because you're like 5% less likely to end up with egg on your face, just a bit more data to go off for both individual riders and - more importantly - broader manufacturer trends. i also usually don't post these predictions on the internet, which helps with the egg on face situation. i'm not sure predictions this far out are particularly useful because like. how would i know what aprilia's doing this winter. this is basically complete guesswork. but also it's funny being publicly wrong about things, so i'm not going to overthink this and just give you a championship order based on nothing but vibes, hope, and a dream

marc

pecco

pedro

jorge

diggia

binder

vinales

a. marquez

morbs

fabio

bastianini

bez

aldeguer

zarco

rinsy

oliveira

r. fern

mir

ogura

marini

miller

chantra

i did this in two minutes and i don't like it!! the main one that i don't feel GREAT about is bez, i thought the vibes were pretty good from his first test and it feels like i've stranded one aprilia in a completely different bit of the field to all the others. idk i think it's just that i see everything after the top two as quite congested and there were a bunch of people where i wasn't quite sure i could justify ranking them lower in my head - and admittedly some insane hopium where yamaha is concerned (listen, they can't be THIS shit forever, they just can't). (and hey, there's always a chance i'm actually being too pessimistic, and that midfield being kinda mid will get yamaha back in the mix!!) so that's how bez ended up slipping down quite far. the other problem is the ktm situation... the moment i commit to pedro at pee three i am apparently predicting that ktm has a remotely workable bike for this year despite *gestures*, which then means that i suddenly have three highly rated riders i can't be putting miles and miles away. and for that matter, bastianini having a mildly meh catalunya test (i automatically wrote valencia test lol) isn't really justification to put him four places behind vinales. but we move. 8-9 is a concession to the idea that the gp25 doesn't seem to be as radical a transformation as gp23 -> gp24 and year old bike this time will suit the michelin rear better - at which point a. marquez being a reasonably reliable performer and morbidelli being used to the machinery do come into play. i am actually an aldeguer hopeful (still, barely) but also idk man, i think if that bit of the ranking is congested then he could easily drop down quite a few places and i also think he could struggle quite badly especially early on. nothing ogura has done this season justifies me putting him fifteen places behind the lead aprilia, and yet idk who i'd bump for him. i think fourth for jorge is kind of pushing it and i could also foresee a season where... well, he's got his title now, he's not going to be fighting for the title this season, so he can go back to his high risk high reward ways of just trying to go for the win whenever possible even when the bike isn't QUITE there and as a result regularly binning it. but also idk who i'd want to bump ahead of him!! i think jorge has shown this season he CAN be an extremely reliable points scorer and he also ultimately i reckon he has more raw pace *even on limited machinery* than some of these other names so. idk. i think diggia will have a good season but fifth in the championship is already A Big Step for him and with that kind of injury, also no guarantee he'll be 100%. ultimately the problem is that i'm kinda not really particularly high on the stonks of any non-ducati manufacturer, but also the ducati rider field is SO depleted that i kinda feel like surely some riders can sneak through to take some spots in the chasm of ability that comes after marc/pecco. you can tell i rate zarco and do not rate fernandez and also think honda will just like... never get better ig? anyway i didn't actually switch a single position from when i quickly did this in two minutes and now i'm just over-justifying unknowable predictions so let's leave it at that, happy holidays lads

[burirammin]

hiii🤍 do you reckon it will rain tomorrow during the race? i hope you still enjoy it (+i hope you get to witness a marc podium)🫶

the answer got a bit long sorry heheh. I hope the same as you do and in addition I hope Fabio can do something in the race. His starting grid is great and he likes the circuit afaik 👊👀

About the weather, there will be rain (if the forecast can be trusted that is) but I’m not certain it would fall during the race. Would spice things up if it does tho, that I am quite certain of.

First things first, I do enjoy the gp. The atmosphere and the people more than made up for it. Not even mentioning that all the other sessions were great to watch. Marc’s beautiful entries in turn 3. Somkiat’s gorgeous home livery. Fabio’s hot lap so good it got him straight through to q2 from q1, and in p1 no less???? Dudeee. I would never ever regret attending it. These bikes are hypnotizing to observe.

On other note : it’s so nice to see visible improvement on some of the bikes. On friday, the hondas got wheelie problems accelerating into the long straight out of turn 3 (especially joan) but it’s almost entirely gone on Saturday! Small victory!!

As for the sprint. I’m just a bit sad that no other bike could compete with the top three and the gaps just got pulled farther and farther every lap, even marc stops pushing so hard in the latter part of the race (which is understandable). But the saddest thing I’ve witnessed might be savadori. I know he’s a replacement rider but the gap was so horrendous, I fear that he might actually get lapped in the full race. I probably would not know this from the broadcast so I’m a bit surprised to see it. (He did run out of fuel in the out lap and have to be taxi back to the pit. Might have something to do with that. Maybe aprillia is experimenting, who knows) Bezz, diggia and binder did swap places quite a bit at turn 12 tho and it was awesome to see. It ain’t much but that was my highlight of the sprint.

I might sound a bit negative but the gp is fun! Don’t let my disappointment from the sprint sway it the wrong way :)

[collecting--stardust]

random (very weird - sorry for that) question: think of the motogp grid (2023 or 2024), pls sort the grid in "cat vibes" and "dog vibes" (not related to the pet the rider has; more like personality vibes), which riders have dog vibes and which riders have cat vibes ? like, for me Bez has the ultimative dog vibes, while Marc has cat vibes (and i can't explain why) 😂💕

Hello Mira 🫶🏻 It's not a weird question and really interesting actually! It got me thinking and while I do face some difficulties on some riders, here's my take:

dog vibes:

- raul (I mean look at him! No explanation needed.)

- alex marquez (idk he always gives off huge puppy vibes kinda like a husky?)

- alex rins (actually he reminds me of a cat too but I think he's slightly gives off more of dog vibes)

- enea (sometimes he gives off 'cat sleeping in random sun spots' vibes to me but after I saw his dog hagrid I was like ah, yeah that makes sense he does gives off dog vibes I'm just blind to it lol)

- aleix (he reminds me of a dobermann)

- bez (literally the epitome of dog vibes)

- augusto (if aleix is a dobermann then augusto will be great dane)

- martin (like rins, I am stuck between cat or dog vibes but yeah I think he falls onto the dog vibes category more)

- taka (he gives off black cat vibes sometimes but overall vibes he's more to dog vibes to me)

- zarco (idk much about him but he certainly is not cat vibes)

- miller (same reason as zarco)

cat vibes:

- miguel (he gives off fancy cat vibes like persian cats)

- fabio q (idk he sure has the dog vibes going on but I think he's like a maine coon and I dont even know why)

- franky (black cat personified)

- pecco (come on there's no way he's a dog vibes person)

- maverick (he's unpredictable to me so really cat-like)

- marc (to me he's a ragdoll cat and I don't take any criticism)

- mir (idk he really reminds me of that cat in the ghibli movie kiki's delivery service)

- pol (idk much about pol but from the clips and videos I've seen of him he gives off cat vibes to me)

- brad (another rider that idk much about but he gives off the opposite vibes from darryn which is 100% dog vibes so I assumed he's a cat vibes type of guy)

- diggia (he reminds me of a Scottish fold lol)

- luca (he's a tough one. I spent too long because he looks exactly like his cute poodles but I think personality wise he's more of a cat. A calm one, but can be mischievous at times.)

- pedro (listen. this guy reminds me of a squirrel for some reason so this is extremely tough for me but after a long time thinking, I have come to the conclusion that he seems like a siamese cat too so yeah.)

I don't know if it's accurate or not but it's just my opinion. Thanks a lot Mira 🩷

[moonshynecybin]

would you mind sharing your marc marquez likes you power ranking?

im still working it out in my minddddd… so. with the caveat that i am just saying words recreationally:

alex

HUGE gap

aleix has known him FOREVER. theyre complex but im throwin him here bc there arent many men on the grid marc would let ass-lift him to the moon

im gonna say. fabio. traded helmets. always friendly. also fabio LOVES HIM and marc will usually match someone's energy…. have they hung out much this year? no. but we always have TOMORROW

enea… maybe… he’s ALSO known him about ten years by now and enea is like. the contrarian of the italians. friendly little guys having gay brunch together as ive discussed… again marc WILL meet your energy and i think enea is just kind of a dreamy lil sweetie sometimes and he can leave stuff on track pretty well. marc appreciates that i would wager…

about on par with enea if MAYBE slightly under him depending on who we’re talking about are the rest of the spanish/catalan riders... he helmet traded with jorge martin last year, he was teammates with joan... i think mileage varies depending on how long hes known em but we can go ahead and group them under distantly friendly but bonded by place of origin. pedro not really a marc fan but also a child so he maybe drops a few places but not too far.

luca. true neutral. would be friendlier but the vale of it all prevents them from wearing joint turtlenecks to some event in like. cunty solidarity

diggia? needs further investigation

pecco. do i think hes UNfriendly no. do i think they could easily GET unfriendly absolutely. they dont super jive to each other's jokes, pecco was mean to alex like three weeks ago, they genuinely would rather crash than let the other pass, and there's the specter of vale's little legacy coloring every interaction. that being said i think they are both VERY invested in not having the media recognize it as an actual personal rivalry and could play a game of cards in an airport waiting lounge if pressed. pecco i think in particular has this gentlemen's duel perspective, but marc simply doesnt want to get asked about it every weekend until he dies... pecco ALSO likes to get a lil bitchy in presscons and i think marc doesnt like that lol. have some couth. anybody remember BYE BYE HONDA ? not endearing

franky. marc and alex have had an INSANE relationship this year with franky including like. rushing to his aid in a medical emergency and numerous racing incidents where franky was low key being a maniac with BOTH of them. lots of that. franky had been around the longest of the academy kids so he has enough context to keep his cards relatively close to his chest but i get the sense hes a little WISER than some of these other punks so hes kind of an x-factor. ranking him below pecco purely bc i dont think marc in particular takes kindly to alex slander lol sorry 2 my frankyalex queens you are correct but MARC. is stupid thx

jack miller. called marc a whiny princess or something about his arm surgery that marc ranks among the most traumatic events of his life. im guessing marc did not enjoy that.

bez. no quarter for this clown.

[anitalianfrie]

Wait when you mean tits out Fabio do both Fabio's count?

Well it was tecnically intended as quartararo but now that I think about it is actually equally probable Diggia will do it

[topnotchquark]

Now that Pecco has flopped his way to a second championship I think we should send his ass back to Moto2 so that he can actually learn riding. Maybe give Bezz that Ducati seat while we're at it. Then watch as Bezz and Marc go at each other like two rabid crazies. Let Luca use all the Ducati secrets and come up with a Honda fitted with a nuclear reactor. Enea and Diggia will look hot on the Podium in the background as everyone around them fights to death. Fabio should be given a pass for one murder on the grid because he is suffering on that scooter and that's the least we can give him for always having the tits out. Trust me on this I have a plan.

[unhinged-motogp-confessions]

i forgot it was threesome thursday fuck

so

mav and fabio q

diggia and bezz

vale and casey

dovi and a second dovi just because

marc and dovi

diggia and enea (actually just to see what those two do privately together)

pedro and tony

.

[batsplat]

as might have come across by now, i love doing dumb rankings for things, which obviously includes ranking top ten riders after the season ends. which is only fun to do if you do not take it too seriously!! this is just as a laff. did it very very quickly top off my head before listening to the race podcast episode ranking the riders so I could argue with them in my head, was curious if they'd change my mind on anyone, they did not

just for reference the race's combined rankings were: 10) vinales 9) binder 8) zarco 7) diggia 6) bastianini 5) fabio 4) bagnaia 3) acosta 2) marc 1) jorge (impressive this did actually match up in terms of the riders i picked because i swear their one last year was bizarre)

here is my quick fire justification for each

Next off - always a coward's concept but idk, I'm clearly too fond of aleix. retirement privileges. the poles were neat, the races frustrating but ultimately also a bit inevitable feeling, too much of the year too anonymous. flyaway kinda a waste (also it makes sense to have a next off in this case because there was not a single other rider I considered even for a second for this list, like it's very much a grid in two halves for me this season idk)

10. Diggia - was generally impressed and happy he cracked on from last year, love athletes getting better at things. It's the Marc comparison that kills him for me. You don't need to be beating marc but you need to be close to him SOMETIMES and like. finish ahead of him when he's not gotten a penalty. just do not think the gp23 was quite as poor as the non-marc riders were looking, have to accept that bez's season was basically a write-off and go from there. Late stretch with the injury was really strong - positive season by his standards but that ends up bagging him tenth

9. zarco - some really impressive pace on a really poor bike. The qualifying is obviously the big thing, like the one lap pace was just consistently... surprisingly impressive.... Felt very yamaha era, I didn't realise he still had that in him. Races meh but no more so than other Honda's and he showed a little of what that bike was capable of. zarco to me feels like one of those riders who does need to feel comfortable in an environment to properly perform, and I get the vibe the lcr set-up is doing him a lot of good. still a bit of a terrorist sometimes in races - but unlike a couple of riders who did not make this list, at least he actually backed it up with a little bit of magic

8. Vinales - man this guy... I mean cota was obviously amazing and so was portimao tbh, but unfortunately it's a twenty round calendar. The starts are abysmal even by aprilia standards, after phillip island I made a vow with myself to never put him in my fantasy league team again and then broke that at catalunya ii, a race I'm not convinced he was physically present for. also with all love and respect for aleix, genuinely remarkable it's taken three seasons for vinales to actually get the better of him - and even that was helped by aleix disappearing over the flyaway stretch. extremely vinales season, we all know what we're getting at this point

7. bastianini - not even BAD as much as I found it deeply uninspiring. obviously also pretty damning he failed to secure third place. he flirted with the idea of involving the best bike on the grid in the factory team in a title fight two thirds into the season, then instantly changed his mind. just basically IMMEDIATELY crashed when the title contender shouts started... so much for the consistency thing when he's actually pushing huh. the qualifying h2h with pecco is criminal, which to some extent reflects well on pecco but. not that well. Late race pace gimmick only takes you so far buddy. Fell off less than the three guys ahead of him in the standings, but at least those three were clearly trying to be fast which fundamentally I think is a good idea in motogp. I also still haven't forgotten whatever tf he was getting up to in the catalunya i race, though admittedly catalunya ii was in itself a memorable follow-up. the post-race aleix comment is a genuine contender for the funniest thing anyone has said all year and almost pushed him into my top ten just because of how much i enjoyed that. and now for the good stuff!! when bastianini's on it he's clearly super fast, the late race pace gimmick DOES still do crazy things sometimes, and he did have some serious consistency going for him even when he was twenty seconds back on the other guys. race craft always been a bit dubious to me but like. points for pulling some of those moves off without crashing. improved his sprint performances and did manage to bounce back from serious injuries last year. interested to see how he gets on next year

6. Binder - I did not think I was being generous with this ranking!!! he was the top non ducati points scorer and I still believe on balance the gp23 is a better package than what binder had. sure, this was another pretty uninspiring season but like... maybe the issue is that I've long felt binder was overrated and the ktm was underrated, like I never bought this whole 'he'd win a title on a ducati!!' talk. so I felt vindicated early in the season and then I got over it and could appreciate the performances he put in. he outscored a guy I think most people agree is a truly generational alien-level talent - didn't outperform him, but that is still a respectable accomplishment. the ktm might not have slipped down the pecking order but it WAS relatively further adrift from ducati than last year - lack of peaks hurts binder post Qatar and how pedro just reliably seemed the best ktm in terms of pace but. y'know. that gets you sixth

5. pedro - yeah man, what a stunning rider. I always try to set the hype levels low when a guy is switching class because you truly never know, but he's the real deal. felt very casey-esque in vibes more than result in that his ultra promising start to the season actually slightly hurt him afterwards, but quite frankly this is also down to bike performance and him overreaching on machinery that doesn't allow it. you could feel him losing his patience... he's hungry and knows he should be fighting right at the sharp end of the field. which is fine - to a degree. inevitably some of the mistakes end up costing him in this ranking, even though I still feel like they tell me nothing about his ultimate potential. the comparisons to marc's rookie season are worse than useless because if you really think marc wouldnt have crashed more in his rookie races than he did if his debut had been with, idk, Ducati ... Idk what to tell you man. Hopefully he's gotten some of the stupidity and recklessness out of his system, but yeah he could do with that bike things none of the other riders could. also CONSISTENT high pace - even if the conversion wasn't always what is should be, he really was almost always the fastest ktm rider in any given weekend. looking forward to next year if ktm still exists

(also sorry but you CANNOT rank him this much higher than binder if he's been outscored by him on the same bike, like it's a top ten best riders not top ten riders who you vibed with the most. binder outscored pedro and u put him SIX places lower in the rankings?? it's not supposed to be a ranking relative to expectations - maybe this is also what hurts marc slightly in my rankings... he clearly adapted very well to the ducati BUT the fact that he was adapting just inevitably meant some of his performances especially early in the season weren't quite *there*, which knocks his ranking slightly. this 2 me is how you do a ranking of the 'best')

4. Fabio - the problem with ranking fabio is that fundamentally you cannot really compare him to some of the guys in this ranking because he is just riding with a completely different set of challenges and priorities. he's not under the strain of a title fight, he's not got a decent benchmark (think the injury is still a serious factor), the eye test tells me he was highly impressive but I also can't really rank him higher. he has a massive machinery deficit but also fundamentally that means if he has a shit weekend, he's going to just be essentially invisible. even though I fully believe he would be right up there with the guys ahead of him given the correct machinery, if not beating them, just kinda inevitably means he cannot put together as complete a season as the guys ahead of him. also helped by how the Yamaha has gotten generally somewhat better over the course of the season, which means recency bias is swaying me. really recaptured some of that old qualifying magic at times. That race where morbidelli took him out haunts me. He's also kinda hurt by me not seeing enough of him on my screen but this is not his fault. I would be fine putting him first lol

3. marc - he's very likely gonna win the title next year, for now he gets third in this ranking. in the pro column is obliterating with the gp23's, though quite frankly that also reflects how unimpressed I was generally by most of those guys. I think the bike was nowhere near as good as he made it look for much of the year, especially given the rear tyre situation... I also don't think it was quite as poor as his fellow gp23's regularly made it look. he adapted very well to the bike especially at his age, he showed he still has the old magic, he did everything he needed to this season to fight for the title next year. a lot of the year he spent riding with bikes he had no business racing, there were some inspired rides through the field, and all three of his sunday wins were impressive in different ways. he also had more than his fair share of bad luck. but y'know, he was in the title hunt vibes-wise long enough that it's worth pointing out he finished over a hundred points off the top two in the rankings. which probably feels like more than it is given the sprint factor - still, percentage-wise that clocks in at just under eighty percent of bags' points... I'm not discounting the machinery difference but it makes me more comfortable with giving him third. the qualifying isn't actually as poor stats wise as it FEELS (average grid position another stat you can whack bastianini with if you are so inclined btw), but it still wasn't what it should have been. gp25 will probably be good enough he can at least slot in besides pecco, but he doesn't want to get into that 2015 era valentino habit of continually having to do Very Impressive Rides with great overtakes and all the rest of it from pee nowhere at the end of the first lap. also a bit too crash-y - and I do give him one or two penalty points for stinky race craft working his way back up the order lol. he's too old for that, and also there may come a time where he does need to start watching that crash count a bit more (throughout the weekend). maybe it's sustainable, but it might well not be. I didn't like those numbers in his prime, I like them even less now. all that being said he could easily go first in this ranking and I almost put him there, to me there's no real distinction. post-summer break I think I would put him first

(editorial note: twas interesting to see catalunya ii qualifying felt like the first time catching a tow off pecco actually *worked*, and I am a little bit curious if that was because pecco was deliberately attempting to give him said tow or whether he's figured out not to bin it on the ducati in that situation. watch this space ig)

2. Bags - the fastest rider this year and should have been champion, so of course you have to penalise him for not winning. I do actually think he performed better than martin but also he had the factory apparatus behind him and martin did what he needed to do. seven crashes - one he was completely blameless for, two racing incidents he was at most in that 40-60% range for, four on his own. I find the sepang sprint crash quite excusable, catalunya sprint I am pretty unimpressed by, misano ii I honestly still don't understand anything about his race and Silverstone sprint I am very meh about. the racing incidents do feel like major punishments for minor crimes but fundamentally just like... don't be in that situation I guess. if you don't watch where you're going when you cross the street under a green light and get run over, even if it's not your fault that won't actually do you much good. genuinely had some quite poor luck, like I don't think all this bike/tyre stuff was just bullshit on his end - same with martin last year at... I want to say qatar? shit happens. I do think he needs to get more serious about sprints, though to some extent his ranking reflects a continued stubbornness on my part on the sprint front. you're supposed to be fast on a sunday!! he was fast on a sunday. eleven wins are eleven wins and don't suddenly get erased if you don't win the title - sure he was on the dominant bike but he wasn't the only one. eleven wins can be used to slam him but fundamentally they are still eleven wins. and did I mention that he did ungodly things to bastianini in some of their h2h's, who theoretically is quite a highly rated rider... I am always a fan of a good exercise in futility and some of his late season performances very much moved me. decision making sometimes a bit ass, race craft less so. hope he doesn't die in a ditch next season

1. jm - yeah man what can you say, just such an impressive all round season. you can penalise him a bit for the win count I feel ... It's one of those weird seasons because apart from mid season he generally ended up in a position where he was *defending* a points lead, so it was consistently sensible for him to settle for results rather than do anything silly. But there was a lot of settling!! I think it's easy to complain about that on entertainment grounds, but fundamentally this was probably his one shot to win a title (after last year) and he did so. both him and bagnaia made a step up from last year which as stated earlier on I always appreciate - I still think pecco is the all round better well rounded rider with more to his game, but also literally who gives a shit. it's about winning the title!! shout out to his starts... I don't like how important they are in the current version of the sport but they are and his are consistently excellent. the qualifying battle between him and pecco is worthy of mention in its own right - I KNOW you don't get points for qualifying, I'm not even that big a qualifying girl normally, but idk some of those sessions moved me. doing all that with a satellite team (albeit a very well-supported one) and knowing he was leaving next year... yeah. now admittedly he did do the single stupidest thing I'd seen all year when he changed bikes at misano i, which if I had my way you'd get negative points for, but also all those guys behind him made mistakes so whatever. I find the sachsenring crash fairly excusable, the jerez one a lil less so but also fine, mugello sprint was a wee bit silly and likewise indonesia. did also potentially get extremely lucky marc crashed when he did in thailand - if martin's right and he would have crashed there, that's double the title-winning margin right there. race craft a bit eh and I feel like I never really expect him to win any of his encounters with pecco and Marc (and even bastianini), but also le mans was great so. Doubt he'd be champion without sprints but we do have the sprints, congrats on a great season etc etc

and there u go. top five are interchangeable for me and so are the bottom five but i feel quite strongly about which rider belongs in which group. fun season, i enjoyed it

[batsplat]

hihi i was wondering if you are rooting for anyone in particular for the 2025 motogp season? Ik you are a Marc fan so maybe him but I also remember you said in the past that you like rooting for runner ups so maybe Pecco? Or maybe they’re both too basic as choices to root for idk, I think you said you’re a Yamaha fan in the past so maybe them? Anyways l love reading all your posts sm and I hope you have a fantastic year!

this is only barely relevant but guess who had their beautiful baby girl return home from the war today. it has been almost a month. customs wanted to steal her but she has come back to me. fabio quartararo 2025 title campaign starts HERE

anyway as to who I will be rooting for..... uh this is such a loser answer and in the past I suspected people were lying when they said shit like this, but my unironic answer is 'close racing and a close title fight'. like genuinely even on a weekend to weekend basis I really do just want riders to be close on the track together. I wasn't really rooting for pecco in qatar but WAS in catalunya ii, so yeah there is just a natural inclination to back whoever's gonna come out second best. and also varied results!! I want martin and acosta to win a couple races, I'd like to see diggia have a good season. objectively NOBODY needs to be winning 10+ races a season like who asked

but yes I WILL be rooting for my lads at yamaha and in particular the only guy who can occasionally do something respectable on that thing, mr quartararo. I've consulted the tea leaves and I'm pretty high on yamaha's season, like I genuinely think we'll see fabio on a few podiums and maybe even scam a win in the latter half of the season. (the actual reasoning here is that this is when ktm might start really suffering and aprilia traditionally starts spontaneously combusting in autumn, so with only three gp25's there's at least more of a possibility for someone else to slip in, even without a massive gain in actual performance levels.) which means that it should also be quite emotionally satisfying to like,, do some more suffering early in the year and roll my eyes and throw my hands at how AWFUL yamaha is and how we should all DIE. which then makes the payoff even more pleasing when they don't suck quite so much. an autumn pick-me-up

also tbh the way I follow racing, I think it's usually Good and Healthy to root in any one weekend for a mix of frontrunners and midfield contenders. it's character building to be happy about a p7. but yeah wrt the title fight, I do genuinely like both marc and pecco and I think it'd probably be a good story for either of them to win the title. I kinda feel like I was rooting more for marc in a passionate sense 2021 until 2024 aragon but like,, once I saw him dominate I think some of those emotions kinda drained out for me. and pecco I was kinda cold on when I thought he'd win the title but he got me back on the mission,, he's actually low key the perfect athlete for me because I really struggle with dominance but he always keeps me honest by.,, *gestures*. but mostly I want drama!!! I don't really care how we get there!!! I want them to (safely) crash into each other, I want them to become increasingly incapable of talking normally with and about each other, I want them to try and sabotage each other in the team, I want them to despise each other. I'm not super high currently on my chances of GETTING any of those things, but crucially that is what I'm rooting for more than any actual individual athlete. I want the vibes to be so so rancid, I want the viewers to get radiation poisoning just by looking at the screen. I want some towing altercations, I want pecco to imply marc's brother is a dickhead again, I want ducati to do what they did with jorge and dovi and hold peace talks. I want bridges to be set on fire so bad you never even knew there was a bridge there to begin with. bring back real sports 2k25

that being said!! I do think compelling narratives ARE possible without blood feuds, I just also think feuds tend to make compelling narratives a hell of a lot more likely. and really I do just want to see something interesting. I would like the sport to emotionally Move me. the worst case scenario for me is a sort of dovi/marc 2018 vibe where it's like... they get on fine but also aren't super interested in each other as people, either in a positive or negative sense... the runner up is a bit too resigned to his ultimate fate and also makes it all a bit too easy for the title winner... it's not a crazy compelling season by the champion and the end result just never really felt in doubt... AND the racing will be worse than in 2018, which makes it even MORE important somebody moves. I will support any attempts made by any rider to give me something more exciting than that