#(i'm really just focusing on contextualizing that scene in the show... but from what i heard about the books it's even worse there)

[phoenixyfriend]

Suggested Listening

I've heard a few distinct takes on the UN vote and the comparison of the US and Israeli actions in light of it. I don't fully understand everything about the politics around this vote, because it's a complicated dance and trying to understand what people are thinking is close to impossible when we don't know what's going on behind the scenes and what's just political theater... but I think listening to multiple perspectives might get us closer to understanding than just listening to one.

I have provided approximate bias/political spectrum position for each, as well as giving my reasoning or summary of why I think it's a useful listen.

This post includes The NPR Politics Podcast, Democracy Now!, Al Jazeera: The Take, and the BBC Global News Podcast.

To support my blogging so I can move out of my parents’ house, I do have a ko-fi. Alternately, you can donate to one of the charities I list in this post.

The NPR Politics Podcast - March 27, 2024 - Left-leaning, though not as far as some of the others. This contextualizes the relationship between Netanyahu and Biden among the history between Netanyahu and multiple past presidents, including Trump, Obama, and Clinton. It focuses in part on the domestic political dynamics and ramifications that Biden is facing, the question of funding, and the apparent self-contradiction of the US government when it comes to the possibility of conditions, sanctions, or other reprisal if Israel continues to disregard US concerns about the ground invasion of Rafah.

Democracy Now! - Several parts of the March 26, 2024 episode were focused on the UN vote and results - This is a far-left radio broadcast show that gets repackaged for online video and podcast dissemination. This coverage is much more critical, without 'well, maybe they're trying to [action]' as we see in some others, of the United States and its handling of the UN vote and subsequent fallout. The interview with Craig Mokhiber gets into some nitty-gritty details of something called the "General Assembly under the Uniting for Peace," which I didn't really understand. I can't speak to supporting that we take that part at his word, because it's not something I understand enough to endorse. He also refers to the United States as not only Israel's principal sponsor, but also its co-belligerent.

Short section: U.N.-Commissioned Report Lays Out Evidence of Israeli Genocide in Gaza

Short section: UNSC Approves Its First Gaza Ceasefire Resolution Ater U.S. Abstains

Full story: Ex-U.N. Official Craig Mokhiber: Israel Must Be Held Accountable for Violating Ceasefire Resolution

Full story: Jeremy Corbyn Applauds U.N. Ceasefire Resolution, Says World Must Prevent “Another Nakba”

Al Jazeera - March 26/27, 2024 (timezone-dependent, it was the 26th for EST) - I hesitate to place Al Jazeera on the standard left-right scale since it's outside the Western framework, as an independent Qatari news organization with some degree of funding from the government of Qatar. What I will say is that Al Jazeera provides a vital non-Western lens, even if some of the reporters are Western, when viewing politics in the Middle East. In this particular case, it also appears that they had a reporter much closer to the action in the UN than the others, as Al Jazeera has an office in the UN headquarters in NYC.

They also address a few curious things about last-minute negotiations on the floor of the UN, the immediate consequences of the US ambassador referring to the resolution as 'non-binding,' and asserts that the US warned Israel that they would be abstaining this time, which is why the US is seemingly confused at how upset Israel is about it. I'm not sure how intentional it is, but the message I got is that Israel tried to call the US's bluff and was then upset when the US followed through, because the US... wasn't bluffing. And did in fact abstain.

BBC Global News Podcast - March 27, 2024 - Dead center, variably left or right depending on the issue - This is a twice-daily podcast and generally contains three or four separate stories. Their coverage of Netanyahu walking back the cancellation of his officials' trip to the US is first, however, and I'm not sure how much it adds to analysis of the vote, but it is the most recent and has the latest of the updates.

To support my blogging so I can move out of my parents’ house, I do have a ko-fi. Alternately, you can donate to one of the charities I list in this post.

[imminent-danger-came]

Hello friend. At first, I thought it was a joke that there's a Lego show that people love. I've seen you post about it a lot so I figure it's just one of those things that maybe a couple people really really love otherwise, whatever. But I just sat that clip of that characters death and it made me realize I know nothing about anything ever lol. What is the Lego show about? What do you love about it? I'm just super curious

Well. Okay. My embarrassment aside, I totally get it—it is a lego show, but it's my lego show and I'll gladly tell you about it!

(my apologies this got a little long)

*inhales cigarette* I remember starting to watch lmk (Lego Monkie Kid) and not expecting anything except some very pretty animation—it's just legos, right? And then it completely blindsided me. Then I did some digging and realized it's a modern retelling of Journey to the West (jttw—one of the great classic chinese novels), and that half of the whole reason this show exists is to retell a familiar tale to the modern age. That's how the show opens, and that's how s3 ends.

And, at the risk of sounding a little deranged, I'm going to say that the show being legos is thematically relevant. It legitimately adds to part of the story they're trying to tell—and the story Lego Monkie Kid is trying to tell is legitimately very solid. It's super good. They completely blew me out of the water with season 4.

So. The first special and s1 isn't anything too unique on a first watch through. The characters are charming and the show is very pretty, but it's nothing I'd write home about (though, 1x09 is very good—in my opinion—and 1x10, the season finale, builds plenty of intrigue).

But here's the thing: legitimately so much is set up in s1 and you don't even realize it, and it's STILL being re-contextualized well into s4.

So, then the s2 special happens right after s1, and it's like, alright! The plot seems to be going somewhere! We get introduced to a few more antagonists and the status quo from s1 is already somewhat disrupted. But then the last half of s2 comes around. And they're all bangers. 2x05 Minor Scale is GREAT. 2x06 is pure game motif. 2x07 gives us backstory and continues the main protags negative character arc. 2x08 is one of my favorites in the whole show. By this point you realize how consistent the character writing is if you've been paying attention. 2x09 is the beginning of the end. 2x10 ends the season on quite the cliff hanger, and it's like. HOLY SHIT. WHAT IS THIS ABSOLUTE GEM OF A SHOW.

s3 is lovely, and the end of the s3 special has one of my favorite scenes in anything. s4 is so ridiculously good. Lmk honestly has what I would consider to be god tier pacing. They have 10 minutes to achieve their goal, and by GOD are they going to do exactly that.

But like, what do I love about the show specifically?

The animation. The characters. The themes. I kid you not a major theme in s4 of the show is the fact that every single thing you do leads to pain. Being the hero or the villain, it doesn't matter—you cause suffering and destruction with every step you take. You hurt the people you care about. No, seriously. I'm not kidding. THAT'S one of the main focuses of s4, and oh boy is it a wild ride. You get used to legos crying. I am unironically expecting s5 of this show to be a tragedy.

I can not recommend it enough!

(If it's your thing that is! I TOTALLY get not being able to look past the legos, and the fast pacing isn't for everyone.)

Anyways, here's a bonus gif of Mei to end off!

[animehouse-moe]

My Happy Marriage Episode 4: The Gift

Another episode has rolled around, which of course means more to talk about. More about the supernatural side of the story, more about Kudo and Miyo's relationship, and just more about how Kinema Citrus approaches this adaptation. As per usual though, I remain a mixture of surprised and impressed with how this story handles itself.

Now I say that, but I do have a slight critique about this opening sequence of Miyo's dream. Much like the previous dream, this one feels far to exposition focused. It gives viewers too much convenient information in the form of dialogue from Miyo's mother. I think there's really only one possible way to alleviate this issue, and it's to have an explanation for it (which is possible). In this dream, Miyo's mother turns to look at dreaming Miyo in the end. Because of that, this dream version of her mother might actually be aware of Miyo, and as such could be feeding Miyo specific information. For what purpose, I'm unsure, especially as the dream is cut short, but it seems like the most likely avenue towards reasonable justification.

Miyo of course awakes from the dream and the episode starts in earnest with Miyo searching out something to give to Kudo as a gift of thanks for the comb she received previously. I don't think it's anything special in the narrative sense, but it has some rather nice visuals to it.

Like this one, for example. It's just plain satisfying with the patterns and layout, but hides a single key detail: Miyo and Yurie are slightly off-center. Whether it's because they didn't want a perfectly centered layout (which you normally shouldn't do), or because they're trying to avoid tangent lines (definitely didn't learn about this term just recently) with the seam of the two doors, it's an intentional decision which shows thoughtfulness even for something so simple.

They also have some surprisingly involved movement through this interaction that I wasn't at all expecting. Interesting to see them establish the superimposed backgrounds as a trait for this episode here however. It's not everywhere, but it's certainly used to good effect.

Moving forward, something that I've really liked is how well they've managed the layouts for Kudo and Miyo when they're together. That sense of space is apparent in some pieces, but is just as quickly erased by their proximity to one another. This interaction is a great example, as Miyo chooses to keep her distance from Kudo while talking to him, but Kudo responds by closing the gap to remain close to Miyo while talking to her. Not only that, but he kneels to meet her at eye level rather than remaining standing. Really great details to establish the unspoken aspects of their relationship and how they interact with others.

Also, we get a new character today! Kouji's older brother. Plenty of flair and playfulness, I feel like he already adds a great deal to Kouji's character and his struggles. Where Kouji is bound by family and responsibility, his elder brother represents the opposite. Where Kouji is reserved and somewhat more simple, the brother is lavish and outgoing. It's pretty clear that the brother is meant to represent everything that Kouji is not, and does incredibly well with the small amount of screen time they get in this episode to contextualize Kouji's flaws as a character.

Something else you notice through this interaction is how sparing Kinema is with using camera angles. A lot of the time they prefer more flat and head on layouts, but I think that's because they want those more angled scenes to come off stronger. A lot of it can read like a stage play, so when you throw in these incredibly well done 3D spaces it's quite something.

We quickly move on from Kouji and return to Miyo and Kudo once more. From a written perspective, this sequence until near the end of the episode is incredibly creative and well thought out. The entire point is that both are trying to do something for the other, and while they're confident/happy in what they're doing, these stories are presented as separate events, but as emotions brew the visuals of the pair merge together and overlap.

Anyways, the actual events. I'll start with Miyo's because I find it more disinteresting, personally. Her younger sister mocks her openly in the streets, and receives little support from Kouji as his hands are bound by his diligence and obedience. It's the catalyst that forces Miyo to spiral once more, and while I think it's a little heavy handed in terms of delivery, it's a well done piece that takes advantage of the moment. It's the first time Kaya's seen Miyo since she left for Kudo's estate, so of course painful emotions will have been brought to the surface.

Kudo, on the other hand makes a more interesting case for himself for Miyo's sake. I've been constantly impressed with how Kudo's handled himself through this, as it both aligns with his character, and continues to provide Miyo with help and love. I think the greatest example of this overlap is Kudo meeting with Miyo's father in the first place. He is attempting to reconcile the wrongdoings of Miyo's father first and foremost, to provide Miyo with closure in regards to her childhood. It's a very amicable and Kudo-esque approach that bases his effective "challenge" off information and standing, and it plays out really well, in my opinion.

Overall, Kudo's approach to helping Miyo through her emotions and trauma has just been incredibly well thought out. It all aims to help Miyo, but almost nothing he does is direct. He doesn't build Miyo up through his own means, but rather works behind the scenes to find the correct tools and circumstances to give to Miyo so that she can help herself. It's really exemplified by how Kudo interacts with Miyo when she's depressed. Rather than trying to overcome it in his own way, he once more opts to give Miyo the space and time that she wants in order to process things.

Of course, the icing on the cake is Kudo tracking down Miyo's old attendant Hana, which is a massive piece of allowing Miyo the ability to grow and move forward. It's a really well done moment between the pair that allows Miyo the ability to express her sorrow and challenges, and move on to properly face Kudo.

So Miyo does move on, she does offer Kudo the gift that she made for him, and I think it's a really great piece that builds off of those earlier aspects of spacing. Miyo still remains at distance to Kudo, and Kudo still waits for Miyo's consent to move into proximity of her. It's just such a great yet subtle dynamic that I can't wait to see them begin to change and reshape alongside this relationship.

Of course, the episode isn't just sunshine and rainbows and romance, the supernatural aspect remains as we discover Kouji's father is the one behind the shikigami. It's the sort of thing that you really should have seen coming, but is nonetheless a solid idea. It adds yet another layer to the challenges that face Kouji, and the eyes that remain fixed on Miyo. I think my only complaint is that it places Miyo squarely in the "damsel in distress" framework, and if they're not careful I feel like it could really end up ruining Kudo and Miyo's relationship and how Kudo is trying to help Miyo grow into a self-sufficient and confident woman.

So at the end of the episode, it's yet another job well done for Kinema Citrus and My Happy Marriage. The story deftly (if not narrowly) avoids any number of pitfalls that can plague a romance story like this, all the while offering novel additions to the plotline and keeping more than just our main romantic pair in focus. The visuals are pretty, the lighting and composition is as stellar as you'd expect, and there's a surprising amount of good animation in the mix. My Happy Marriage continues to be one of the most solid offerings in terms of new anime for this summer season.

[aparticularbandit]

I don't know if you talked about this already, but that extra scene on Thrall made me go back to Kisses to see if it really was new or i just didn't remembered, and Wanda seemed to skip over the whole thing, as if the kiss never happened

Did Wanda just did this unconsciously and doesn't remember? because that'd be concerning

Or Wanda is just kind of an unreliable narrator? If so, I wonder if there's anything else she just skipped over

And also, does Sarah remember? or just Agatha?

sorry for the silly questions, just something i got fixated on :p

Absolutely no worries! I haven't talked about this (I don't think?), so these are all good questions!

Actually, you have caught the thing!

One of the main things I struggled with when writing Thrall was making myself adhere exactly to what happened in Kisses with no deviations. I found that doing so...really stifled the scenes that we're seeing from Agatha's perspective because they weren't allowed to breathe and be their own thing.

So! While this is probably the biggest deviation from the original, it isn't the first (and it probably won't be the last).

For instance, the entire second chapter is a new addition. Wanda never addresses this, never references it; it isn't important to her the way that it is to Agatha. (In the original, this was me adhering strictly to the WandaVision schedule - that decade only lasted one episode, we saw the entirety of that episode in the show, etc. I gave myself more freedom to deviate in Thrall.) I also added in a new scene in chapter four - Agatha checking, again, to see if Wanda knew what she was doing - and another at the beginning of chapter five.

In most cases, those additions are Agatha focusing on moments that weren't as important to Wanda. In the same way that there are scenes in Kisses that aren't in Thrall - the beginning of seven, for instance, where Wanda learns what Agnes has been doing in Westview while they're still carrying extra stuff Sarah needed them to purchase for the party. This is an important conversation for Wanda. As is the entirety of the conversation of Agnes getting her to stay at Sarah's party - even before the glamification scene. These aren't important conversations for Agatha, so they don't show up.

To be fair, also contextually, these conversations are important from a narrative perspective re: Wanda's relationship with Agatha. They're important for her character development. However, they're not important for Agatha's character journey, so they aren't in Thrall.

But those are additions, not deviations, which is really what you're asking about! (Actually. Rereading your question. This would fall under stuff Wanda skipped over, so you asked about this, too! I'm not as thorough here.)

So. Deviations from the original script. :D

In the third chapter - and again in the sixth - there are moments where Wanda glitches due to the weight of maintaining the Hex. In the show, we see the world glitching around her; in Thrall, Wanda is glitching. She doesn't remember what happens around her during the glitches; Agatha does.

(The third chapter also gives a bit of a mindmeld where Agatha's narrative is exactly the same as Wanda's POV. (It isn't even about Agnes. / (At least, Wanda tells herself that.) / It is about being so horny Wanda would go to town on a hot dog if she'd been given the opportunity.) But this is not what you're asking about. >.>;;;;;)

But chapter three also gives a second kiss where Kisses only gives one. ("I'm stopping," Agatha purrs before kissing her again, much more chastely this time.... / Wanda rubs her finger in circles along Agatha's waist. "No," she murmurs, looking down at her with large green eyes, "you're not...." in Thrall vs. "I'm stopping." / "No, you're not." in Kisses.)

Chapter five has an additional "It's an instinct, the purest form of it, when Agatha curls against her again and wraps her arms gentle around the small of Wanda's waist. "It's okay, hon," she says. "You don't have to--" / "Do you want anything?" Wanda repeats, voice hushed through gritted teeth. Her knuckles grow white. It has Agatha replying to Wanda's request to wear her shirt by telling her "Put it on, dear. You're shivering." instead of bringing up Vision and telling her she's attractive and flirting with her.

Even the conversation leading up to the glamification is different - in Kisses, it's less blatant in terms of the point here is Wanda choosing to trust Agnes because, ironically, Agatha is more subtle and plays naive, but in Thrall, where Agatha constantly narrates how subtle she is, she's not subtle. She literally tells Wanda to trust her, tells her Agnes won't ever hurt her, and then makes a point of pulling out Wanda's insecurities and telling her that she trusts Wanda to not hurt her, even if Wanda says she shouldn't.

In most cases, I would say that the deviation is similar to the additions - things Agatha picks up on that are important to her that aren't for Wanda. How a lot of times when you talk to multiple people about the same event, they remember things differently. Even when you go see a movie with someone, each of you will likely pick up on different scenes or moments, some of the details you might remember differently (I ran into this when I was writing Glass Onion meta - and I distinctly remember having to go back and edit some meta because I'd remembered something wrong). This is basically what you're seeing in these two fics: Wanda and Agatha remember things differently because different scenes or moments are highlighted for them.

In the case of this particular moment, however.

An additional fun thought.

Wanda cuts off the narrative in Kisses. There's an abrupt sort of--

...before she gently presses her thumb on Wanda's lower lip, parting them, and leans forward to-- / The door creaks open....

It's possible that Wanda just doesn't want the reader to know. That's a big fourth wall breaking thought, though, and would require Wanda to have the meta-textual knowledge that someone externally is paying attention to the narrative. (Or at least a subconscious awareness of it.) Similar to how she could rewind and change things in the Hex. The story itself could be a whole other form of Hex.

(That wasn't the intent, but you could read it that way.)

Or, in the moment, Wanda blocking it out of her mind because she's trying very hard to not do anything with Agnes because she's very aware that Agatha is stuck in Agnes and would probably not consent to any of this stuff, which is why drunk!Wanda totally has that entire other scene we haven't gotten to in Thrall yet because being drunk lowers your inhibitions.

Wanda doesn't want to think of herself like that and doesn't want to be like that. Especially in Westview. Where she very unintentionally definitely did a lot of things to people they did not consent to - non-sexually, of course. But she did mind control a lot of people and made them do a lot of things they didn't want to do. And she doesn't want to be that person.

Even if a part of her - as brought up in that scene in Kisses that we haven't gotten to in Thrall yet - absolutely thinks that Agatha deserves it.

BUT YEAH TL;DR - there are a lot of scenes like that and it's mostly prompted by me not wanting to stifle myself by forcing myself to keep everything exactly the same and the different people remember things differently phenomenon that you see play out IRL.

I wouldn't say Wanda's unreliable. She just remembers the events differently. ^^

(I don't know if Sarah remembers or not. The impression is that Wanda rewound time. But she doesn't have that ability without a Time Stone (or outside of the Hex), does she? Food for thought!)

[leagueofgardens]

Deep Dive: Let's Go Find Some Fun!

GEHENA Labs has uploaded a subtitled video of "Let's Go Find Some Fun!" and since it's my favorite memoria story, I'm going to talk a whooole lot about it.

Yeah, this picture isn't from "Let's Go Find Some Fun!", but I'm gonna talk about Tazusa first, so...

I think Assault Lily is not very realistic in that, with a few notable exceptions, it rarely shows the girls suffering any mental consequences because of the battles they fight. They're teenagers; it feels to me like when other people, sometimes their friends and loved ones, get hurt and die right in front of them, those Lilies who are able to just brush it off and keep going ought to be an exceptional few and not the vast majority.

While it's nice in a way that the stories never revel in traumatizing the characters like some "dark magical girl" anime do, it's also a shame that they rarely attempt to explore how the grief and regret caused by death affects people, in the manner that Assault Lily Bouquet did. It was one of the things that made me fall in love with the setting in the first place.

There are exceptions to Lilies taking death in stride, and one of the more subtle ones is Andou Tazusa.

Tazusa is a complex character. Not all of her trauma is because of her experiences on the battlefield. She was tortured, experimented on, has nightmares of the past, and hates what she's become. But in Let's Go Find Some Fun!, I think she is clearly experiencing a different kind of trauma from all that: survivor's guilt.

"Earlier today, we were so delighted. Having so much fun. Is it really okay for us to be like that?" ���Tazusa in "Let's Go Find Some Fun!" (Translation by Letheka)

She struggles to believe that, when other people have died in front of her eyes, she deserves to be happy. That she can be happy. And Mai contrasts her as living proof that Lilies don't have to feel that way.

This is very interesting when you use it to contextualize the first story event in Last Bullet which focused on Tazusa, Boosted Friend. Boosted Friend is a version of a story that first appeared in the original Team Hitotsuyanagi novel, and later also in League of Gardens and its manga adaptation (it's in chapter 8 of the manga.)

This story is that Tazusa, who can't be killed easily due to her regenerative abilities, at last fights a solitary battle where she's completely outmatched. It appears that death is about to come for her, and she welcomes it, because she thinks she's a monster and hates herself. But when Riri saves her and tells her that she isn't a monster, Tazusa finally starts to believe that life is worth living.

In most versions of this story, Tazusa is forced by GEHENA to fight this battle that will claim her life. In Boosted Friend, she goes to fight it of her own free will (sort of; she sets in motion the events that lead to it happening by purposefully returning to GEHENA, her one-time captors, and I very much doubt she failed to anticipate that she might die as a consequence.)

What possessed her to do that?

"The time I spent with everyone, well, it was… quite enjoyable indeed. Even for an empty shell like me, I feel as though something has finally sprouted inside of me. That's why… Riri. I want you to stop following me from now on." —Tazusa in "Boosted Friend", scene 4-1 (Translation by Hắc)

In Boosted Friend itself, none of the various reasons Tazusa claims to have (that it's necessary to atone for her father's misdeeds, that there's no escape from GEHENA even now that she's under Yurigaoka's protection, and that she's protecting the others in Team Hitotsuyanagi by returning to GEHENA) make much sense. Boosted Lilies like Tazusa have been described as often suffering from paranoia and mental instability, and it's tempting to chalk it all up to that.

But seeing Tazusa's mental state in Let's Go Find Some Fun! makes me wonder if there's something more to it, something she couldn't admit to herself during Boosted Friend. Maybe Tazusa doesn't believe she deserves the happiness and the peaceful life she's finally found as part of Team Hitotsuyanagi. Maybe it's her sense of guilt over having survived the experiments, and the battles she's fought as a Lily, that drove her to return to GEHENA.

It's just a theory. Maybe I should even call it a headcanon. But thinking of it that way elevates Boosted Friend from the worst version to the best version of Tazusa's story for me.

Of course, there's another focal character in Let's Go Find Some Fun!: Yoshimura Thi Mai.

Frankly, Mai's been treated even worse than Tazusa by Assault Lily as a franchise. She has never gotten a long-form story that focuses on her. The closest thing is Ensemble of the Eldren Valkyries, which is 1/3 about her at best.

So I can't really say I know how her mind works, just what it is that motivates her to be cheerful all of the time. I've talked to a friend who thinks it's all an act she puts on, like Shenlin's outward persona; something that Mai purposefully does so that she's never a burden on her friends, and so that she never has to show them what she's really feeling. I'm not sure.

What I do think Let's Go Find Some Fun! shows us is Mai's reason for getting involved with Tazusa.

"You're the sort who bottles everything up and tries to seem tough. And you know, I've been cozy with a certain other somebody like that for a long time, so I've got the hang of you types!" —Mai in "Let's Go Find Some Fun!" (Translation by Letheka)

The official Mai/Tazusa ship used to feel to me like they got pushed together because they were the only ones in Team Hitotsuyanagi not already shipped with anyone else, with their mutual love of cats being tacked onto them solely for the purpose of giving them some kind of connection to one another. But Let's Go Find Some Fun! finally made me warm up to them as a couple, and in that story, I think it's meaningful that Mai compares Tazusa to Yuyu.

In Ensemble of the Eldren Valkyries, we saw how much Mai regrets that she couldn't help Yuyu move on from her grief over Misuzu's death. We see that she harbors mixed (although mostly appreciative) feelings about Riri being the one who finally saved Yuyu. I think that in Tazusa, Mai sees someone who's in pain like Yuyu once was, and is determined not to leave her alone and make the same mistake that she did with Yuyu.

And that? That's a pretty solid basis for a ship (even if it's part theory, part headcanon.)

[magnus-sm-writes]

2023 Writing Update

I've written quite a bit this year. Is all of it good? Absolutely not. In fact, I'm certain that most of what I've written will not get published. Sometimes I just write to figure out characters, or to figure out a location, or to just find the general aesthetic of a piece.

This writing update honestly has it all. I'm glossing over things I've written in 2023, with most of it focusing on what's happened in the past month, since that's what I remember the best.

Poetry!

I've written a lot of poetry in the past year. If you saw my Instagram post (shameless self-promo, my Insta is magnus_s.writes), I can't post much about my poetry because it would pretty much just be considered "published", so no one would publish it. Since my main goal (other than personal growth) is publication, posting excerpts from my poetry is mostly impossible.

However, I can discuss my inspiration.

I've been continuing my The Thing-inspired poetry kick. Lots about body horror, which is one of my favorite things. The Thing is such a fantastic movie with so much material to write about, both on-screen and contextual.

More poetry themes I've been exploring recently is inspired by food. Mainly fruit, since I've been reading The Book of Difficult Fruits. It's been fun to write complex fruit metaphors. And make fruity jokes about myself.

Short Stories!

Remember when short stories were my bread and butter? I'm still trying I swear.

This year, I've been very into sci-fi horror. You can thank Wendigoon's video on Roko's Basilisk and the my own face blindness for that. There's something about the horror of AI and the horror of not recognizing faces that's mixed within the past couple of years to become a deep interest in sci-fi dystopias. (I still have to watch Cyberpunk: Edgerunners, whoops. I've seen Arcane, though.)

I have two short stories cooking. One is based on the aforementioned Roko's Basilisk/AI in a Box. It's a short story dealing with loneliness, cancer, and AIs, two of which I've gotten personal experience with as of late.

The other is based on the doppelganger and the uncanny, which were the topics of my senior capstone project. It features a young man, Basil, and an AI, Iskos. It's a short story where nothing really happens, just a lot of emotions and general horror. The usual for me.

This one has an excerpt!

He watches Iskos in the mirror like Medusa, as though the uncanniness won’t hurt him through it.

I'm hoping to find a satisfactory ending and polish it up for publication in the next few months.

Novels!

I've been writing quite a few novels. I haven't finished any, but I'm still just playing around and trying to establish my style in multiple genres. That's why I have a day job.

Greenest and Of Valor & Honor have been my main novels. They're both fantasy, which I'm learning how to write through practical application. Recently, though, I've found that I want to rewrite Hamish, an old gothic literary fiction novel I wrote in 2020 (when I was still a woman, holy shit).

Greenest has been the project I've written the most for this year. That's because I love the dynamic between Sigma, Experiment #24, and Valor. They're such an excellent group of friends to write for.

Honestly, most of what I write for Greenest is either massive scenes (with lots of plot points) or little fluff pieces where I describe Experiment #24's obsession with dissection and figuring out the human body, so I don't have many things to pull. But I did write a little Easter egg for Tsarevna of the Horned Crown into a scene, which I'll share. It's a little treat. For me. :3

Sigma walks the throne room by himself. He studies the various statues of the half-daimon woman. She is smaller than him, even when he first met Valor and hadn’t grown to his full height yet, and well-fed. In some of the statues, she is wearing full armor, and in others, she is wearing very few clothes to show her muscle-heavy arms. The ax she carries is almost impractically large for her small frame.

When it comes to Of Valor & Honor, I wrote a little bit of the first chapter, which I might not end up using for story reasons. But I do love the descriptions from Honor's point of view. She's a character I have rarely written for, and she's incredibly difficult because of that. I'm mostly trying to establish the character voices for Honor and young Valor.

(It's so strange to write young Valor. That's why what I'm sharing has none of him in it.)

Merchants nod at her as they paddle past. Their boats are loaded with goods both exotic and local. Traders from the other towns of Rhuaja with lily-ropes and dried components for potions. Fishers with the daily catches: crabs both blue and red, soft-turtle eggs, fish of all sizes. The traders from Uli-Yuleon with their many gauzy scarves and unusual powdered components.

I was trying to get Honor's love for her country to show on the page. She's a character who fully appreciates her surroundings and the other people around her. I love how observant she is. That's a little weird, but I use Honor to describe the world, and Valor to describe the politics.

And Hamish. Oh, Hamish. Me deciding to rewrite Hamish was a whim a few days ago that I've been following through. I'm seeing it as a marker of my progress as a writer. To see how I've improved at being a gothic writer over three years. Since I got my degree, I hope it's improved somewhat.

I'm honestly going to do an entire update on Hamish alone, both for the progress tracking I've mentioned before and for the maybe two people who followed me back in 2020. The person who wrote that is a completely different person from who I am now.

So I'll just include Van Gogh's Skeleton with Burning Cigarette, like I did in the WIP Intro (more shameless self-promo) as an IOU.

Random!

I might be doing a Sherlock Holmes rewrite for fun? It's mostly just a way for me to get my nostalgia for BBC Sherlock out of my system while actually exploring The Sherlock Holmes canon in a way that makes me happy. It's basically just a goofy personal project that I want to get out of my system.

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@moonlarked

[bootlegramdomneess]

@thoughtfulchaos773 I love that you keep adding to this making my brain rot, my brain work.

this conversation will continue next season in a huge blow up. It's interesting because Carmy does look as though he wants to say more. He often does this. The words won't come, but the look is there.

When Sydney tells him off and says "....you miraculously made this about yourself.." and he is making it about himself, but I get the sense he does not believe it or see it this way. He is like, no I'm doing this for YOU. Yet he shuts his mouth and doesn't speak more.

"This is what you wanted.." I first thought he meant this in a sarcastic asshole way, but he really meant it. While I'm not a huge fan of the love languages, I do use it as a tool for communication skills, and for those who struggle with affection and emotion. having a broad way to contextualize your partner's actions as love is ideal for people. when Carmy says "This is what you wanted." he's saying i'm doing this for you. I'm getting this Star for you. which is "Acts of Service" This also makes me think of the Chef's jacket he brought her after realizing she needed a new one. "I saw you needed this. You're important to me. I will be here for you. You're not alone."

Carmy cannot say the words or finish his thoughts in this conflict that keeps arising. I think in part because he has not consciously realized he's in love with this woman. But romance aside, Carmy shows his love through acts of service. He did it with the beef, with this obsessive need to fix it for Mikey. He did it for Richie by sending him to Ever.

After his fuck up. The first thing he said to Sydney was "I'm sorry. I left you alone. It'll never happen again." He is so ashamed that he fucked up. I get the sense that Shame is something he experiences DEEPLY. It destroys him. Now he has this obsessive need to make it right by getting her that star. Carmy is often misunderstood because he doesn't fucking speak and prefers to let his actions speak for him even though those are often misunderstood as well.

There is this invisible labor going on where he is doing this thing for Sydney and he can't understand why she doesn't recognize it or is annoyed at him for it. I think he's so used to the Synergy between them. Sydney always knows what he means, or always understands him. They are always able to combine their energy to create something greater than their separate parts, and he is not understanding how they aren't on the same page now.

Sydney, on the one hand, knows he knows what he is doing in terms of what it takes to get a star, but she is interpreting his actions in part as selfishness. She is seeing he is shutting her out in all ways. But there is something holding her back from saying the words to him. She has a history of feeling comfortable in telling him about himself. Even in this scene here she is expressing her annoyance to him. But in the later episodes, her silence has become deafening. I think she shares the love language "Acts of service" with Carmy, that's clear, but I think her true love language is quality time. Sydney's silence is partway because she made a promise to Carmy. She promised he wouldn't be alone. She's promised to stand beside him even though she is misinterpreting his actions which will lead to the blow up. This happens often with partners. The silence turns into resentment and anger. Which turns to silent resignation that this is over.

this is sort The Bear hijinks where people are just misinterpreting how they're showing love to each other. Carmy's actions show selfishness but that's not what's happening, at least from his prospective.

Carmy is lost in the woods. He doesn't know why their synergy is gone. He doesn't understand why she's so annoyed with him or confused by his actions. He refuses to examine what is going on inside and is instead focusing on his shame and getting Sydney this gift so she could love him have everything she deserves.

I mean, just look at him trying to vomit up words, but they just won't come and Sydney is just looking at him confused as hell...

smh.

I'm adding to my previous post about a scene I'm obsessed with. It's that moment when Carmy meets Richie's eyes as Richie looks at him, and the next episode, Richie keeps saying to Carmy, "I see you," while Carmy tries to dismiss him.

Richie seems to be telling Carmy, "I know your secret." Another thing; It's not that Carmy stops because the faks walk in; it's because Sydney told him she has a migraine; he'll continue staring at her stewing in it wanting to say more but when Sydney tells him off he listens.

[ohifonlyx33]

if you like darklina, this post ain't it for you. you may want to move on. this post is unashamedly about why I don't like it. you can't convince me otherwise. i'm tagging it appropriately to avoid a fight. you were warned.

....anyway.

I don't see the darkling having any actual care about consent. and this isn't just a post about how later he ignores the idea of consent later when he mutilates her body and steals her powers to do do horrible things, although that action certainly supports what I'm about to say.

In that moment when he and Alina are kissing, he gives lip service to consent, but he doesn't actually care at all about it. He would stop if she said no, but only because he's playing for her trust in the long run. Not because he cares about her, but because he has an ulterior motive. He is more interested in making sure he can keep his sun summoner in his pocket than he is interested in instant gratification.

Oh sure, he will use her that way too, gladly... but that part could wait if need be... because he has bigger plans and he needs her on his side. He knows that she's vulnerable, scared and alone, because he reads her letters (but also because it's not hard to figure out), and he uses that to prey on her. So he tries to get all close to her and give her that intense stare (creepy to me!), gives her sad backstory to sympathize with him, and he calls her The Special One and lets her believe she has control. He feeds her ideas, but wants to make sure she sees it all as her idea. That's how manipulative people work.

It's the same way debt collectors will let you run up a debt with high interest. Loan sharks will lend you more money, knowing you can't pay it back. Mobsters will grant you a favor in return for something. After reading a bit about sociopaths and psychopaths, I'm inclined to believe it's pure psychopathy--the charming and level-headed mimicry of emotions to emotionally manipulate people without ever feeling anything, even remorse. But I'm open to the idea that he could be a sociopath.

He plays into Alina's hand, to give her a false sense of security, so that when her defenses are down, he can use her. And when she kisses him and consents to more, that's his sign that her defenses are down and he has enough sway over her to use her in this way. Which is why it's so terrifying when she says yes.

Now maybe he was attracted to her (ew) and maybe their powers draw them to each other in a metaphysical way (eh), but I don't think that should be confused as love. Perhaps he saw glimpses of her as an individual underneath her power. But her power was the thing that he was obsessively drawn to, not her soul. So no, I don't see him having any real feelings for her besides "well, she's the only one who will live long enough to not die before me, so i guess that means eventually we'll have to get together and I don't have to be lonely!" which again is why he's willing to wait and manipulate her in the long game. But using someone to fill a void is not the same as love.

likewise, I don't see Alina having any meaningful feelings for him, other than the physical attraction of a handsome man paying you compliments, the possible pull of powers, a bit of the sympathy, and her own emotional vulnerability. Between the absence of Mal and and ongoing identity crisis that forced her to form a new identity, she had a pretty big void she wanted to fill.

(Because Mal was some she'd known since childhood to be sweet and kind to her, dependable, protective, good-hearted, and trustworthy--someone she feels safe with, someone she never wants to leave, someone she talks to and values and loves deeply, someone she knows better than anyone, someone who shares her scars but still brings her joy. Likewise, Mal knows her deeply in the same way and loves her for the person she is, wants to be the person she wants, and is willing to accept her however she is. And that's love. But this post wasn't gonna be about Malina)

[roblox-sleep-aphasia]

Thoughts on encanto after thinking on jt and dewatching it

Don't open this if you can't handle other people's opinions, I'm not talking to be harassed please. I just want to share my own thoughts, thank you

I get this movie is very well liked and I like it well too but I still have both positive and nitpicky thoughts just as with any media because nothing is perfect.

And of course, SPOILERS!!!!!

▪︎I can't stop thinking about Isabela accidentally growing a cactus some time then stepping on it

°Music music MUSIC I LOVE this movie's music

•I absolutely adore that Mirable is the leading factor into Antonio's love for animals, leading to his gift.i like to imagine special interests is how a gift is determined in the family.-

Maybe Bruno had an interest in fortune telling or the general magics for fun

-We see peppa gardening but maybe she had an jnterest in weather or playing in the rain

Julieta could've shown great promise in cooking from a young age, or helping the injured

before j go on I've heard that the novel adds more context which is just pulling a balan wonderworld imo.

You shouldn't have to contextualize your story in a novel especially if it feels like the og is missing something. I'm mentioning this in case something is mentioned there I ramble on about

•Bruno is a very likable character but I feel like he should've had some more time on screen or a bigger role in the story instead of just being a plot device kinda(people hate Lin I don't care, I wish Bruno got a song explaining his anguish with being so far from the family) or be given a flashback of Abuela demonizing him after the mirable vision. Maybe it's traditional that he reads each baby when born for their future(or when they're about 3 or 4) and he had that, and she freaked out on him and then called his miracle a curse, and he wasn't hurt, but he believed it and left to protect everyone Then Abuela could have her own pov of what happened and she's mortified that when she goes to apologize and ask for more context to protect the magic, Bruno is gone his door is dark and she feels like the day she lost her husband, only now it's her only son gone

●Dolores is a great interesting character but we don't get much of her or much of anyone given an arc besides Isabela, and i feel her one line where she's in love fell flat as we weren't given anything else until the rapid wrap-up of everything at the end(off topic I loved the ending and I would adore that new door as a tapestry for my wall, gorgeous) and i feel like we should've been given something , even if comedic relief, like her caught listening to him sing when Mirable goes to talk to her about the magic, but maybe this is contextualized in the novel more

•Bubo ❤

° Socks concept art ❤

Small nitpick Feels like it should've focused on the family a little more rather than just magic and mirable and the movie itself kind of reduces the characters to their gifts when the message was the head of the family shouldn't be doing that but it's fine its not really an issue just kinda funny Side note The scene with the father of the triplets, you can see her pain and we can only imagine what she had to go through. Props to the animators being able to show that kind of raw genuine emotion and reaction. Very talented people for real, has to be the most heart breaking but my favorite scene

°Music music MUSIC I LOVE this movie's music

•I absolutely adore that Mirable is the leading factor into Antonio's love for animals, leading to his gift.i like to imagine special interests is how a gift is determined in the family.

-Maybe Bruno had an interest in fortune telling or the general magics for fun

-We see peppa re j go on I've heard that the novel adds more context which is just pulling a balan wonderworld imo. You shouldn't have to contextualize your story in a novel especially if it feels like the og is missing something. I'm mentioning this in case something is mentioned there I ramble on about

•Bruno is a very likable character but I feel like he should've had some more time on screen or a bigger role in the story instead of just being a plot device kinda(people hate Lin I don't care, I wish Bruno got a song explaining his anguish with being so far from the family) or be given a flashback of Abuela demonizing him after the mirable vision. Maybe it's traditional that he reads each baby when born for their future(or when they're about 3 or 4) and he had that, and she freaked out on him and then called his miracle a curse, and he wasn't hurt, but he believed it and left to protect everyone

Then Abuela could have her own pov of what happened and she's mortified that when she goes to apologize and ask for more context to protect the magic, Bruno is gone his door is dark and she feels like the day she lost her husband, only now it's her only son gone

●Dolores is a great interesting character but we don't get much of her or much of anyone given an arc besides Isabela, and i feel her one line where she's in love fell flat as we weren't given anything else until the rapid wrap-up of everything at the end(off topic I loved the ending and I would adore that new door as a tapestry for my wall, gorgeous) and i feel like we should've been given something , even if comedic relief, like her caught listening to him sing when Mirable goes to talk to her about the magic, but maybe this is contextualized in the novel more

•Bubo ❤

° Socks concept art ❤

Small nitpick

Feels like it should've focused on the family a little more rather than just magic and mirable and the movie itself kind of reduces the characters to their gifts when the message was the head of the family shouldn't be doing that but it's fine its not really an issue just kinda funny

Side note

The scene with the father of the triplets, you can see her pain and we can only imagine what she had to go through. Props to the animators being able to show that kind of raw genuine emotion and reaction. Very talented people for real, has to be the most heart breaking but my favorite scene

[scriptstructure]

How can the size of paragraphs be used to indicate mood and flow of a scene? Does the range of the paragraph sizes have an impact on readability, and are there typically different ranges and lengths common to certain genres (like comedy, horror, romance)? I'm attempting to write my first long story, and I want to figure out how to use the format of paragraphs themselves - especially in unison with others - in order to indicate some themes and tones, but I'm not sure how to go about it.

Paragraphs break the information in a scene/ chapter up into coherent sections. A paragraph in fiction often works very similarly to the way you’ve probably been told to write paragraphs for academic papers and such: you set up a concept (topic sentence), you explore the concept (body), and you reach a conclusion.

Note: I say ‘often’ and ‘similarly’ because obviously the nature of prose fiction means that these structures often look nothing like their academic cousins. The function is the same, the form it takes is often completely different.

Also note: While many prose fiction paragraphs do the above, prose fiction also utilises paragraphs to set pace, to produce imagery, to create mood and tension, etc. Prose fiction uses both ‘proper’ paragraphs, and paragraph ‘fragments’ in order to achieve the proper aesthetic and informative effects.

We’ll use some excerpts of Virginia Woolf’s Orlando as an example, this paragraph is early in the first chapter, describing Orlando’s character. We have an introduction where he is sneaking through the grounds of his father’s estate:

and then the body of the paragraph follows along with what Orlando does and sees while he’s sneaking:

And the paragraph concludes with an observation on what this means to his character:

This isn’t academic writing, the exact way that these elements are utilised will change to suit the writer’s preference, but this is how a paragraph is structured. Similarly to a scene or a chapter, a paragraph should enclose an idea as a single discrete narrative arc.

(If you’ve been following this blog a while you might be noticing that writing takes on a fractal quality, when you look at it long enough, a large piece work has a similar broad structure to any small part of it -- not something you need to think about while writing, it would probably drive you up the wall, but very interesting and cool to think about)

Paragraphs break to signal a topic shift. This might be as subtle as going from talking about the weather in general (It was a dark and stormy night, and the forest around the black castle tossed and howled like the sea in a gale ...) to focusing in on how the protagonist is affected by said weather (In the top of the highest tower of the black castle, the imprisoned Prince Prism stayed tucked in the corner under the meagre blankets he’d been given, and hoped that the tower wouldn’t topple over in the wind ...) Being aware of when you shift focus or topic and beginning a new paragraph accordingly keeps your prose clear and easy to keep track of.

Paragraph breaks also indicate changes in action (paragraph 1: character a does something, there is some description, paragraph 2: character b reacts, and there is some description of that reaction). 

This is also why when you’re writing dialogue it is important to make a new paragraph each time the speaker changes.

(from The Short Happy Life of Francis Macomber by Earnest Hemingway, because Orlando doesn’t have a lot in the way of conversational exchanges)

You might have found this yourself at some point, but not been able to place quite what was wrong, often I’ll read something (usually fanfic or self published: fiction editors are usually very good at sorting out this kind of issue) and find that there’s a paragraph that just goes on and on and on and I lose my place and have to go up a couple of lines and try to figure out what happened but then I can’t remember what happened at the beginning of the giant paragraph so I have to go back and start over but at that point I just close the story because I’m reading for pleasure and this is too much like work, you know?

When a paragraph goes on for too long, covers too many topics without breaking, it becomes difficult to read. Functionally, the paragraph break signals to the reader that the concept has been concluded. They can distill that paragraph down to an easily retained bit of information (Orlando likes to sneak around so he won’t be disturbed reading), and then move on to the next bit. When the paragraph doesn’t break, it’s indicating to the reader that the concept isn’t finished, and that they have to hold onto all the disparate ideas they’re being handed until the very end of the paragraph before they can distill it.

This doesn’t only happen in prose fiction, by the way, this is one of the structural areas where a lot of academic writing falls down too, because there’s so much contextual information needed that the writer keeps on going rather than breaking it up and dealing with their different points one chunk at a time. (You know those textbooks where you start reading and then halfway through a page you have no idea what you’re supposed to be getting out of it? That.)

Of course, this is not at all to say that long paragraphs are all bad. Done well, a long paragraph can assist in creating mood and pace of the story. But it must be coherent in itself, and it must have a clarity of progression through the concept that it is setting out.

Long paragraphs can create a sense of lingering over details, it can indicate a lull in action, or a calm moment. It’s also often used in setting scenes or elaborating on the internal moments of characters.

Medium sized paragraphs can also set scenes or detail internal moments, but they are more often the vehicle for propelling the action forward. Things happen, those things tell us something about the characters, setting, or situation, and we learn from them.

Paragraph fragments break up the page, used well they can make a point stand out to the reader, it’s an emphatic way to place a line on the page. Paragraph fragments can also be used to indicate that events are happening at great speed, or to create the sensation of a cascade of experiences. Action scenes often benefit from paragraph fragments, but so do moments of realisation, or emphasis.

In the following excerpt from Orlando, there is a couple of long paragraphs detailing why Orlando has become disenchanted with the people he meets and wishes to isolate himself, but also that he is conflicted in that he loves the works that people create (he loves poetry and reading) and then the final conclusions are repeated in isolation:

(the pension referred to is to retain a poet in his home to produce new works for him, even though Orlando has just realised that the poet is a scammer and has upset him pretty badly)

The first line must break because it is a new line of dialogue, but it also serves as a paragraph fragment to show Orlando’s new approach to isolating himself, he orders the servants to leave him alone and just takes a few dogs up to his rooms. But the second paragraph fragment shows the contrariness of his nature, after several paragraphs detailing how upset he is and how much he wants to be alone, he’s still paying this guy to stay. 

These two fragments reveal a lot of character in just two punchy little lines. They’re cushioned in among a lot of much longer paragraphs, which makes them stand out even more. If you’ve not read Orlando, I’d really recommend it, and any of Woolf’s other work, she’s got a great approach to tone and pacing.

And changing the length of paragraphs is going to be something you learn to balance. It reminds me of this quote about writing sentences that are interesting to the eye and mind (remember what I said about fractal structural elements?)

“This sentence has five words. Here are five more words. Five-word sentences are fine. But several together become monotonous. Listen to what is happening. The writing is getting boring. The sound of it drones. It’s like a stuck record. The ear demands some variety. Now listen. I vary the sentence length, and I create music. Music. The writing sings. It has a pleasant rhythm, a lilt, a harmony. I use short sentences. And I use sentences of medium length. And sometimes, when I am certain the reader is rested, I will engage him with a sentence of considerable length, a sentence that burns with energy and builds with all the impetus of a crescendo, the roll of the drums, the crash of the cymbals–sounds that say listen to this, it is important.”

--Gary Provost

Just like sentences, you want your paragraphs to be varied. Not always wildly different, but if you tend to write longer paragraphs, you might want to mindfully utilise shorter paragraphs to break things up and lighten the load on the reader. Similarly, if you find yourself constantly writing page after page of paragraph fragments, you might want to see if you can piece some of those together or expand on the concepts you’re attempting to capture, and have some longer paragraphs in there.

Variety, balance, like so many things paragraph size and structure is something you need to work out as you go and it will change with each story. Most of the time it will probably come naturally to you because our brains are used to making stories and sharing information in the way that it is easiest to understand, but sometimes it goes wrong and you can’t put your finger on why, and it can help to have an understanding of what paragraphs are for and how you make them do what you want them to.