#(i'm being dramatic it's only been one week and we should be done by saturday) | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

miss-vanta-likes-to-write · 28 days ago

Text

He Canceled Hot Girl Summer 🔥

Series master list 18+ MDNI

The pregnancy test incident...|

Aaliyah had come storming into your apartment with another bag of pregnancy tests. She was like a bat out of hell as she pushed Jay away from you, who was slumped over the toilet, giving up your salmon. Rosette was busy pacing back and forth as she was hastily going through your period tracker app.

You were late late, and it was freaking all four of you out. “Ugh what's the verdict, Rose?”

“Who cares!? Piss on these sticks next. They all can't be loud and wrong!” Aaliyah shouted as she helped you off the floor. She tore open the box and shoved the pregnancy test into your hands.

Jay rolled her eyes, “she's already taken seven different tests. Face it she's done for.”

“I'm counting the days and weeks, and I keep coming up with the start of summer.” Rosette says, she's in tears, “who were you with?”

“I hope it wasn't that jack ass who could barely hold his liquor. His poor hair dye job barely made up for the wort on his nose.” Aaliyah snears.

“No, I didn't let him hit. His breath smelt too bad, and I wasn't drunk enough. I've only been with that guy with the mohawk.” You're sighing in relief as you pee on the stick.

“You're fucking with me!” Aaliyah shouts, “You let that fuck boy hit raw!”

“To be fair.” Jay said, “She's got an implant. We all keep plan Bs on hand.” she's the only one not freaking out.

“What are you gonna do?” Rosette says through her tears.

“Get an abortion is the only right answer.” Aaliyah folds her arms across her chest.

“I can't afford that, I just started working!” You whine, “I don't wanna take the pill and be done for a week!”

“Ask Autumn for the cash.” Jay suggested.

“He will murder me.” You cry thrashing about just being dramatic. “I can see it now ‘You said you were careful damn it!’”

All four of you sigh in defeat at the reality of you asking Autumn for help or risk putting your summer on hold.

Chapter 3: Brunch with a side of almost Tyler Perry Drama.🥐

Sunday brunch-day, a tradition as old as time for a woman like you. Brunch on Sunday was always something you and your friends did after a Saturday night full of sin. When you lived back in the States, Sunday brunch was Sunday Service and after Sunday dinner, and each time, you had a throbbing headache. So when you finally moved out of your parent's home, Sunday service became brunch, and with the help of mimosas, the hangover headache faded to a comfortable buzz.

Now, though, since the cancellation of what was supposed to be your hottest girl summer ever, your Saturdays were spent nursing Omari and your Sundays spent with Autumn and his boyfriend or girlfriend of the week. Today, though, there would be no third wheeling with Autumn and his newest hunch buddy. Instead, you were meeting the father of your baby.

“So” Autumn said as he pulled out a chair for you to sit in, “You got any idea on how we're doing this?” He took up his spot next to you, leaving the seat across from you both open for Johnny. “I was thinking good cop bad cop?”

“We” you readjust the blanket on Omari, he was still sleeping in his little pram, “are going to be nice.”

“Hm, you can be nice, this is still the fuck who ran out on you.” Autumn crosses his arms.

“He was a one night stand, gone wrong.” You sigh in exasperation, “besides it's not like he knew.”

“Yeah yeah whatever. I'm still confused on how I gave you the money for the abortion, sent Rossette with you and you both ended up spending that money at fucking Tesco.” He grumbled.

“Mistake one, you sent Rosette. She heard Omari's heartbeat and started crying, and then I started crying, and the nurse was confused, thinking we were a couple. If you wanted him returned to sender, you should have had Aaliyah go with me.” You shrug and pick up the menu and start reading over it. “Aaliyah would have performed it herself with only me and a set fucking steps, still would have taken the money to go shoe shopping after.”

“She had to work.” He leaned over you to check on his nephew, “but I'm glad he's here, couldn't imagine life without him.” There's a soft smile on his face.

In the beginning, he, like your father and eldest brother, had been angry. When Omari came into the world kicking and screaming, they all nodded their heads and said he was gonna be strong and a handful. Your mom, while hurt that the baby came before marriage, got over herself quickly the moment she saw the ultrasounds and proudly started calling herself ‘Mimi’ because she was too fly to be a ‘Granny' or a ‘Nana’ and her own mother had already taken the name ‘Gigi’.

“Bonnie lass.” That thick Scottish accent rang through the air above the quiet chatter of the patrons of the café.

You looked up to see the hostess showing Johnny to your table. He was exactly as you remembered him, broad shoulders, muscled body, lopsided grin, and that stupid mohawk that refused to be tamed. His gorgeous blue eyes lured you in, and you're reminded of exactly how he managed to ensnare you to begin with. Slowly, you stand up and step around the pram and hug him, just to be polite and definitely not to secretly feel him up. He hugged you back tightly, almost like he didn't want to let you go.

“Johnny, it's good to see you.” You stand back to get a good look at him.

“An’ ye still look as gorgeous as ever.” He smiles even wider, and he glances down at Omari, who is starting to wake up.

There's a cough, and you realize that he didn't come alone. The pretty boy from a year ago is with him, and he's holding a pastel baby blue bag. “We weren't sure what to get him, so we got him a bit of everything.” He offers the bag to you, and you take it with a smile.

“Kyle right?” You say as you all get situated around the table.

“Yeah, that's me.” He rubs the side of his neck and glances at Autumn, who is frowning.

It's a little awkward as the waitress comes by and takes everyone's order. You suddenly find messing with Omari's blanket more interesting than breaking the ice as Autumn orders the strongest drink on the menu. You roll your eyes, wishing that you weren't breastfeeding and could partake in some liquid courage. After the waitress leaves (no doubt is she gonna be watching this real-time Tyler Perry drama), you clear your throat and pull your son out of his pram.

“So.” You look at Johnny, and for a moment, you feel bad that this incredibly intimate moment is being held in public. The man is fighting back tears, “This is Omari Malachi Knights.” You're careful as you turn your large 99th percentile baby to face his dad. “Oma baby, this is your father, John.”

Omari is, of course, more interested in grabbing your hair and trying to yank it into his mouth. He only gurgles and coos, taking in his surroundings. You can feel your wig slipping at his little tugs, and you do your best not to let him embarrass you.

“Bairn looks jus like me.” Johnny says with a slight laugh.

“Unfortunate.” You manage to pry his little fist from your hair, “The audacity to look like you and I carried him for nine months.”

“He seem ta hav’ a penchant fa hair pulling, but he gets tha from ye.” Johnny laughs and tips his head back as he does so.

You gasp and laugh, too. The joke is a stark reminder of the fact that the father of your child is a clown. Him being funny is what led to Omari being here in the first place. Kyle only sighs and sinks into his seat. Autumn only frowns even more.

“Ain't shit sweet, my guy.” Autumn says, bringing your laughter abruptly to an end. He hasn't smiled or laughed yet, and you both know that joke was funny.

Johnny furrows his brows and looks at Autumn. The uncomfortable tension is starting to creep back. “Ach, jussa joke mate.”

“Pay him no mind. He's grumpy before he gets liquored up.” You shoot your brother a look to say ‘be nice’.

“I just don't want us to forget the main issue, we handle that then we can ah kee kee and hah hah.” He shrugs and leans back, “John, do you plan on doing right by my sister and nephew?”

Johnny genuinely looks offended at the idea of not doing right by you both. He looks Autumn square in the face and nods, “Yea, plan to, if my Bonnie lemme, I'd make a honest woman out ‘f her and her and Omari would have mah last name.”

Kyle chokes in shock and looks at Johnny with wide eyes. He is practically willing his friend to stay on script. You can tell they probably had talking points practiced for this meeting and Johnny really said ‘Fuck it. We ball.’

You stare at Johnny and absently bounce Omari in your arms. You were sure it was just him posturing against your brother, not wanting to be cowed. Your eyes slide over to Autumn, who has an unreadable look on his face, jaw clenched. The waitress chooses this time to come back to the table and silently give everyone their drinks. She takes your food order, compliments Omari sweet little toothless grin and hurries the fuck on (probably to tell her coworkers the drama she's been spying on).

Finally, Autumn sips his drink and nods his head, “That’s what's up.” He smiles, like Johnny passed some test that only men were able to give and pass. “Oma is a real handful, and I can't always help my sister out with him.”

You watch as Johnny visibly deflates and breaks into a grin, “Bairn is a MacTavish, he ain't s’posed to be easy.”

You raise an eyebrow at him calling Omari a MacTavish but make no comment on it. Instead, you check Omari over to make sure he doesn’t need a change, “You wanna hold him, Johnny?” You move to stand up, but he's already moving to help you out of the chair. His hand rests low on your back, and you have to suppress a shiver that wants to shake you. “I'm not letting you hold him standing up, and I can sit and stand on my own.” You pout.

“I ken tha, but ye cannae be tae careful.” He says.

You shoo him back to his seat and placed the baby rag on his shoulder. You're acutely aware that there are eyes on you as you do everything one handed. You look at Omari, and his little blue eyes are staring back before he gets to making his little baby noises, “Be good yea, no fussing.” You whisper, and then slowly, you show Johnny how Omari prefers to be held. He likes to sit up so he can see and still needs his back and head supported.

“Oh, he'sa big'un.” Johnny is all smiles as he watches his son. Omari looks up at him and immediately starts cooing and clutching to his shirt.

Kyle snorts, “I'm surprised your ugly mug hasn't scared him yet.” But he too is also smiling.

“Nah, tha would be his uncle Si tha scares him. Ach an’ wot ye mean mah ugly mug!?” He playfully glares back, “we all cannae be a pretty boy.”

You watch as the two of them trade barbs back and forth in between gushing over Omari. “Hm strange, he doesn't do well with new people.” You sip your drink.

“That's the boy's dad, of course he knows.” Autumn teases.

“He's four months old, don't tell me you're starting to be superstitious like mom.” You raise an eyebrow at him.

“Hmm” Autumn hums, “Your stomach sat low the entire pregnancy, and you had to return all that pink, so yeah.”

“How was the pregnancy if you don't mind me asking.” Kyle says, “It wasn't too difficult was it?”

At this, Johnny stops talking in some strange language to his son and looks up. He's a bit worried, “Yeah was it okay?” And the sincerity in his voice makes your heart melt.

“He was a fine pregnancy to carry, but pushing him out took forever and a day and by the time ten hours of labor had come the doctor was saying that if he didn't come out by sunrise, he was getting cut out.” You laugh, “Omari must have heard the threat because he was here at the crack of dawn the next day.”

“ ‘m glad ye had a safe delivery, Bonnie.” Johnny is looking at you, and he looks down at Omari. There are words he wants to say, but it's obvious he won't say them in front of Kyle and Autumn.

Taking pity on him, you stand up and grab the baby bag, “I gotta feed Oma, mind coming with me to keep me company?”

“Uh yea.” He stands and follows you to the little family room that the café has. It's got a changing table and a couch for breastfeeding purposes.

You close the door, lock it, and unbutton your shirt, “hand him here.” You say, and he does. It always takes a second for Omari to settle down to eat, but when he does, he latches and digs his little gummy mouth right into your nipple.

It's quiet as the two of you sit there, not awkward like earlier, and he is watching you closely. At once, you both try to speak.

“Johnny-”

“I'm sorry.”

You both stare at each other, and his blue eyes have unshed tears in them. You avert your gaze and sigh. “You first.”

“I'm sorry ah wasn't here chuilein.” He whispers. “Ye shouldnae had ta do it alone.”

“I was not alone, Johnny.”

“Ye ken wot I mean.” He sighs, running a hand through his hair, “despite tha alternative look tha mohawk gives me, I'mma family man at heart, and I wan’ us to be one.”

You nod your head once, “I'd rather us try co-parenting first Johnny. And if you're gonna do this, you can't half ass it.” You look him dead on with squinted eyes.

“I wouldnae dream of it.” He says, “What exactly do you need and what does Omari need, and I'll get it for ye.”

“I don't need anything.” You laugh, but he isn't laughing.

“Chuilein, I'm serious. I know you have your brother and friends, and they help but he's mah bairn, and rather you acknowledge it or not ye’re mah hen and I want to do everything for you both an’ make sure he has his mum an’ da in the picture.”

You sit there quietly and sigh, “we will give it a trial run. I'll let you come to my house on days I work from home so you can watch him while I work. And as we get more comfortable, we can talk about custody arrangements.” You nod your head, already knowing your people aren't gonna be happy about you diving head first into this. But Johnny has a point, you yourself didn't grow up in a single parent household, and you wouldn't subject Omari to that. Besides, your friends and brother couldn't always help, and daycare ate a hole in your finances, not to mention your lack of alone time and just time to be yourself.

You were feeling less like a bad bitch and more like a sad bitch these days. You didn't look like you were going through it, but gots 2 be glued, lace fronts (with half way melted lace), and concealer could only do so much. It would be nice to be even close to who you were before you dropped your baby and your world became about him. You didn't mind, but there was only so much you could take and as quiet as it's kept the first two months of motherhood you almost caved and went back stateside.

You wince as Omari starts gumming at your nipple and you switch him to the other breast. “Don't make him get attached just for you to decide you don't wanna do this.” You sigh.

“I won't do tha ta ye or him.” He gives you a reassuring smile. “are ye okay wit me tellin’ mah folks?” He asks, his cheeks are little red, and he won't look at you completely.

“Are you choosing now to be shy, John?” You nudge him slightly in the side.

“Nae, jus’ don' want ye tae freak out the moment mah mum and sisters demand fa me ta bring ye both home.” He’s pouting now, and his cheeks are really blushed.

“Sure. But as far as going to see them, let's give it a minute.” You agree.

After brunch, Kyle says that he's got plans to meet up with a friend and wishes Johnny good luck with the rest of his Sunday. You're not dumb, as the hot bitch group chat is going off and Rosette is saying that she's about to get her back blown out by that pretty boy. Autumn kisses you on the cheek and makes you promise that you'll call tonight, it's his way of reminding you to not sleep with your baby daddy or you'll end up with ghetto twins. And just like that you find yourself at your apartment watching Johnny get peed on because he was too slow to change a diaper.

In the end, you both decided to post a picture of Omari and Johnny on his private Facebook. He tagged the post with his mom and sisters. And put the caption as

‘Meet my twin. Omari M. MacTavish’

(You decide not to kick up a fuss about the MacTavish part.)

It wasn't even thirty minutes before his phone was blowing up with FaceTime calls from his mum and sisters.

Johnny decides to take the call in the nursery. He's got Omari in his arms, and he carefully sits down in the rocking chair. He checks on his little mini me and then answers the call. It's his mom and one of his oldest sisters. Both of their faces were in pure shock.

“Hey mum.” He whispered shyly, “can't be too loud. I'm trying to get him to nap.” At this point, Omari makes it his mission to start fussing and fighting sleep like it's an mma match. His little cries and whines are the only thing on the call.

“A bairn! A wee wean! Johnny, how did ye hide this from us?” His mum is in tears.

“Long story mum.” He really doesn't want to explain to her that her grandson is the product of a wild one night stand. His sister Davina only gives him a knowing look.

“Ach, f'course ye get wrapped intae this.” Davina frowns, “where's his mum?”

“Takin’ a shower. Mah, poor chuilein been doing it on her own if her brother and friends cannae help.” He looks down at Omari. He clearly has no interest in taking a nap. So he turns the camera to face him and his mom coos immediately.

“Oh Johnny, he looks jus like ya da with those eyes.” She sniffles “are ye on leave? When will we get tae see him and his mum?”

“I am, an' we're workin on it.” He sighs, “she wants ta do co-parenting and-”

“John MacTavish ye do plan on marry'n the girl!” Davina scolds, “Mum didnae raise you tha way.”

“It's not that simple. She wants to take things slow. ‘m jus happy she wants to let me ‘round.” He explained.

“Well,” his mum smiles, “be sure ta send me plenty ‘f pictures of mah newest grand bairn, an' ye make sure ye do everything she says.”

“Yes mum.” He turns the camera back to himself and smiles, “Gotta go, it's nap time an’ he really is kickin uppa fuss.”

They say their ‘I love yous’ and there is a promise to call as soon as he gets a moment to himself. Johnny looks down at Omari and grins as his son fights sleep. He is positive that things are gonna work out. And he adores the feeling that he gets holding his son.

There's no way things could go left…right?

Tag list: @evergreenlake @royalty-cashinout @leahnicole1219 @gxuxhdjdu @daft-queen

#black!reader #john soap mactavish #johnny mactavish x reader #johnny mactavish #johnny soap mctavish x you #johnny soap mctavish x reader #johnny soap mactavish #Johnny soap mactavish x black!reader #Johnny MacTavish x y/n #reader is female #reader is black

83 notes · View notes

happy-mokka · 1 year ago

Text

Hi there.

I'd like to start with a warning first: Beware!

I'm rather new to tumblr, so if what will come next turns out to be total bs, I hope you all get out of this unscathed, forget we ever crossed paths and will be able to go on with your beautiful lives.

If you're still here, you'll about to hear the nice and accurate story of a guy that stumbled naively into a Good Omens binge watching weekend and came out forever changed.

Roughly 4 weeks ago I was asking friends what they were watching currently. I needed new material to turn to.

That's when it happened.

One of them casually brought up Good Omens on Prime.

I should give it a try.

Angels, demons. Terry Pratchett. Neil Gaiman.

Ok. I like fantasy. I like good story telling. I have an odd sense of bad humour.

I decided to give it a try.

To my eternal shame I have to confess, that until lately I hadn't read a single line written by both Pratchett and Gaiman.

I've read thousands of books. My love for them is so widely spread over all genres, that it simply did never happen. There was always some other book and author that came next.

Oh, how blind and ignorant I have been. I now clearly see the grave error of my ways.

If you can't forgive me, that's ok. I'm having a hard time myself doing so.

Be that as it may, I'm currently reading Good Omens and won't stop there. I promise.

Update notice 2024-06-03 I am now 6 books into Neil Gaimans works, last one was this...

Update notice 2024-08-02

It's been now a few weeks since the allegations on sexual abuse by Neil Gaiman came to light. As a fan of his work I am devastated. As a decent human being I absolutely stand with the victims. Will I continue reading or watching his work? Well, I still have some books on my to-do shelf stack that I already bought and would not want to waste them. So I will read them at some point. Won't buy new ones, however.

As for shows he's involved with, I will continue watching them, if with the given circumstances anything new comes out at all... Too many good people are involved and invested in the works, that don't deserve punishment for his doings.

Good Omens was nothing short than life changing for me. I will never stop cherishing it and the person who brought it into my life (and I certainly don't mean Gaiman by this).

So, where was I?

Right.

Binge watch session of Good Omens season 1.

Saturday evening. Around 9:30pm.

Episode 1 wasn't even running for 5 minutes and I was already sucked right into it.

Frances McDormand's God intro and the garden eden scenes.

I was instantly in love.

Michael Sheen had already been one of my favorites. His first minutes as Aziraphale directly hit home.

David Tennant was familiar but I also hadn't been into Doctor Who, so it took another 5 minutes to also fall for Crowley...

The path was set and I started to deep dive in.

6 hours, 6 episodes, 1 Antichrist and 1 almost Armageddon later I crawled into bed on early Sunday morning to get at least a few hours of sleep. I fell asleep with an almost idiotic grin on my face and a feeling of deep content.

Only 5 hours later, technically still Sunday morning, I woke up, prepared a coffee infusion and switched the TV back on.

There were important deeds to be done. Episodes to be watched.

I could sleep later.

Narrator: No, he would NOT sleep later...

I again immediately fell for the 2 celestials.

The slightly different arc, no dramatic catastrophe on the horizon, instead beautifully written side characters and wonderful new details on the two main protagonists...an evolving love story that had already been clearly visible in season 1...

And god, or Satan, HOW I LOVED JON HAMM as Jimbriel...

I again ended up binge watching the whole season, only interrupted by a few coffee and bathroom breaks.

6 hours later. The end credits were already over for like an eternity and I hadn't moved. Just sitting there, all goosebumps and teared-up.

I ate something. Had to. Don't really remember tasting anything or remembering what I actually had.

I was dumbstruck.

The friend that had suggested to start watching GOs, hadn't let out much more detail, so I hadn't been prepared in the least, for the emotional train wrecked state it had pushed me into.

Hours later I finally fell into an uneasy sleep.

The next morning before work I just sent Tori Amos' Nightingale in Berkeley Park to my GOs friend followed by a ❤️, as a signal that I had watched it all and let her know that there was no need anymore to hold back with talking out of fear to spoiler me.

We had lunch together and spent the whole time rambling on our GOs induced emergency emotional state and the whole beauty of especially Gaiman's season 2.

The next days we kept randomly talking about GO before she pinpointed me to tumblr, in case I wanted to dare a real deep dive into GO fandom.

So here I am now. A week's passed. I've spent hours of reading so many amazing posts around here. So many eye-opening moments.

I'm not only speaking of all those perfect interpretations of GO and it's characters.

What impressed me so much more is the fabulous energy especially radiating from the queer community.

Not being queer, only having a few queer friends, I hadn't really realized, just how big a thing GO in general and season 2 in particular was for you.

Update notice - 2024/04/10

Attention! This installation of base module "Sexuality" is currently being updated to a more flexible one...work in progress...

Update notice - 2024/07/03

At an age where my eyeglasses turned bifocal, I finally came to the realization, that not only my eyes celebrate the duality of life. In fact my whole being did it for as long as I can think back. It is astonishing, how efficiently one can get used to ignore feelings, that society considers unseemly. So, finally, this is me here, bi and queer🌈.

I was raised to walk earth open-minded, to respect everyone, no matter of religion, gender, nationality and sexual orientation. This is so deep a part of my DNA and personality, that GO for me was just a beautiful story about the blind following of religion, the meaning of life and, most of all, love.

Both protagonists are played by male actors and apparently being in an ages long repressed gay relationship? I didn't even consider this unusual or anything else than normal.

2 immortals fall deeply in love, first into humanity, life on earth and then finally into one another, while trying to overcome all the madness of belonging to two opposing sides of the same medal.

A great parable on the pursuit of happiness. Skillfully written for the screen and perfectly casted and played.

Well that was then.

Now I see you and I have to thank you, for opening my mind even further.

For giving so much joy so generously, although every day is still a fight for your rights.

For giving me a space here among you and the chance to delve some more in beautiful minds and fanfiction.

So, if you're still here and reading this, maybe it was not all bs. Maybe it gave you some minutes of entertainment and distraction from every day's stress and problems.

It sure was for me.

I'll end this with some favorite Shakespeare quotes, although now I'm not so sure any more, if not some red haired demon might have actually written this...

"If we shadows have offended, Think but this, and all is mended, That you have but slumber’d here While these visions did appear. And this weak and idle theme, No more yielding but a dream, Gentles, do not reprehend: if you pardon, we will mend: And, as I am an honest Puck, If we have unearned luck Now to ‘scape the serpent’s tongue, We will make amends ere long; Else the Puck a liar call; So, good night unto you all. Give me your hands, if we be friends, And Robin shall restore amends."

☘️

A Midsummer Night's Dream - William Shakespeare

🔻🔻🔻

More personal middle aged ramblings:

👉🏻 birthday meldown 2024 🔥

👉🏻 my year in books 📚

👉🏻 1 year anniversary of Good Omens 😇😈

77 notes · View notes

lyon-amore · 1 year ago

Text

Time Trial Chapter 1-Introduction

Prologue

From: [email protected] For: [email protected] Subject: conversation

These days are being chaotic, a party is coming up in Duskwood and all the adults are going crazy.

Actually, I was sending you this message because I haven't heard from you in a long time and I was wondering... Have I done something wrong? Are you mad at me?

Maybe I went a little overboard when I told you what I felt, I'm sorry...

Can we talk again like before, Jake?

Sincerely, Hannah. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I lower the screen reading the last message my sister had sent me. It was not good to continue having this friendship. And her infatuation with me made me feel uncomfortable. I had always gone as a friend, someone she could have support from. The older brother I had always wanted to be for her. I wanted to have someone from my family close. Even if she was just my sister, I still did not dare approach my father. It was a bad idea. I throw my head back, releasing the heavy air from my chest. I was sorry for Hannah for cutting myself out of her life, but everything had gone wrong, I do not know when she thought I might be interested in her if I have never given those signals by message. How could I guess that my words had been attractive to her? Just thinking about it makes me want to vomit. “Of course! Here you are!” hands hold me by the shoulders, the scream makes me jump out of the chair “Right at the computer.” “Where did you want me to be, Al?” I turn the chair crossing my arms. Albert was not only my roommate, but also my best friend since high school. His chaotic manner somehow combined with my very relaxed one. For me, you could say that Al was like a brother to me. In a way, it saved me from the loneliness of high school, at a time when I just wanted to escape from the foster home. If it were not for him, I would have already left. ‘'I don't know, running through the streets like every Saturday?” “Well, you do not know me very well.” I answer, getting up from the chair and going to the door. “By the way, there is no coffee left.” I stop in my tracks and turn to look at him. “Was not it your turn to shop this week?” I look at him with a frown and he shrugs his shoulders. “I'm sorry? I have been a little busy this week with programming classes, working at the store-“ “And of course not at all busy with Bianca,” I roll my eyes, this time finally leaving my room. "I could say that if I knew where she was" I turn to look at him and see him take out his cell phone “. I haven't heard from her in days.” “Maybe she didn’t like you in the end.” “She told me she would call me.” <<Sometimes that is said out of politeness, not because they really want to date you.>> I grab the keys from the entryway cabinet, opening the door. Again, Al stops me. “Are you going to go see her?” He asks me in a funny tone. “No, I am going to make the purchase that you should have made, “mom” “ I answer with a certain regret in my voice. “Hey, don't talk back to your poor “mother” who breaks her back to pay us food and a roof to live in” he puts his hands on his chest, dramatizing with his voice. “A package has to come with a new hard drive. Can you stay until I return in case it takes a while to arrive?’ "Are you sure you don't want me to go?" “No, that is how I get some air. I will be right back.” “OK.” I leave the apartment throwing the car keys in the air and catching them. The fact that he asked me if I was going to see her meant that maybe Katherine had told him something. A small smile appears on my lips. We had decided to go little by little, getting to know each other. I do not think the word “dating” was even in our vocabulary yet. I greet some neighbors as I go down the stairs. They are quite older people and with whom we have had no problems, we behave well, we avoid having parties and if we bring more friends, we always do so without causing problems. We do all noisy activities in places where they are allowed, although I don't know whether to call myself noisy, I think I am the most responsible of all.

When I go out into the street, I receive a message on my cell phone. The chat did not stop ringing. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Katherine Guess! In a meeting with the teacher she said that we should choose a topic to investigate to gain points if we want And obviously I signed up I have had to investigate disappearance cases!

Jake Is not it still too early for them to give those types of jobs?

Katherine Shus, Jake! Not all of us have been lucky the first time with our talent 😑

Jake In our class they have not told us anything yet. But we are with classical literature.

Katherine I still don’t understand how come you never chose something regarding computers Al told us that you were good at it ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I try to write the reason, but I quickly delete it. I do not think she is interested in knowing why I chose it. It is not that I am going to write a book or anything like that, but I guess it is because I have more than just a computer under my arm. I want to have some connection with “her.” ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Jake I like literature. It makes me feel good. I do not think there is anything strange about it.

Katherine Of course not But it’s strange, I imagined you more in programming or something like that ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I roll my eyes. I do not need to learn something that over time, I had been learning without problems. Although I do not deny that sometimes it is hard, but I would not admit it in front of them. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Jake Well … let us change topic. Do you know anything about Bianca? Al told me that he has not heard from her in five days.

Katherine No, I don’t know anything about her But from what she told me, she used to disappear days as a teenager So I don't worry about her, she will appear soon

Jake Could you at least text her to properly reject him? He does not deserve waiting for her like this.

Katherine Oh come on, like we don’t know what Albert is like Aaaaaanyway What if we go tonight? I have thought about going out with the group

Jake I will have to look at my schedule.

Katherine And can’t you leave a space in your schedule for me? I promise you’ll have a good time ❤️❤️ You can bring Albert and Jeremy, my friends like them

Jake Alright.

Katherine I love that I can be persuasive with you

Jake :) Sorry, I guess I am still not used to it yet, you are my first relationship.

Katherine Oh really? Well, it seems strange to me, I thought you took everyone out on the street with that enigmatic air you have

Jake You should not pay attention to everything you read in books, did you know that?

Katherine Come on, don’t be angry I will treat you very well because I am your first girlfriend ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I notice how my face heats up little by little. I do not know how to react to her words. I knew that she had already had a boyfriend from some of the conversations on one of our group outings. “She seems happier about the situation than I am.” I tell myself, putting away my cell phone. I want to go easy with her, because she is my first partner and I want us both to be comfortable with our differences. Her last sentence is strange though, almost like she is older than me when we are the same age.

I get to the store and try to put Katherine's conversation aside. It is quite easy, I am used to quickly forgetting about uncomfortable situations. Just clear your mind and move on with your life. I will make it not affect me so much, what am I? Child? While I am grabbing everything we need at home, I see Jeremy restocking some cans. Al and I met him last year, he was the new kid and Al, with that tendency of wanting to be friends with everyone, made him join our circle of friends. Sometimes I think that he was not interested in me as a friend unlike Albert, who seems friendlier with him, maybe it is because he is more outgoing and funny than me. “Hello Jeremy.” I greet, approaching him. He adjusts his glasses and looks at me, raising a hand to shake me. “Hi Jake” he greets me back, continuing to replenish cans “. Let me guess: it wasn't your turn to shop today.” “So much notice?” I ask, carrying the basket. “No, I just received a message from Al asking if they brought those noodles that he likes so much today, so you can buy them.” And he just had to remember now and not when I was at home. I sigh and remember Katherine's invitation. I might ask him now that I am here. “Katherine invited us to the bar tonight.” I answer, a little disinterested. Today I wanted to advance a little in my studies, work occupies me more than I thought. “Will Bianca go?” His question surprises me, I did not know he were interested in her. “I do not know, she has not come home yet from the date with Al.” Jeremy nods, acting a little like he does not care much. "I don't know, Jake" he answers while scratching his forehead, uncomfortable “. Now you're with Katherine, Al with Bianca, I think it would be a hindrance to a couples night.” "It is not a couples' night" I answer and I am sure I am blushing. How long will it take until I can say that we are a formal couple? Weeks? Months? “, it is just going out in a group, she will go with her friends and maybe... well, maybe there is a girl you like who is not Bianca.” He laughs and lets out a sigh. He places the last can and takes control of the car again with the rest of the things he has to replace. "Well, it's rude to refuse an invitation" he shrugs and smiles “. Let me know if you are going and I will come to your apartment to look for you.” “I will send you a message. We will speak later.” “Yes. Speak you later.” I watch him leave and I get a little uncomfortable. I do not want Jeremy to feel displaced because Al and I are dating someone. I mean, it is not like we are both already used to seeing Al with some girl. But this was the first time I saw my friend excited about one he really liked. I am also trying not to be too curious about Jeremy and his crush on Bianca, from what I know, It is better not to get into a love triangle, they never end well and you always get hurt. And I am not saying this from my experience.

Once I return home, I hear insults coming from Al's room. “All good?” I ask putting away the purchases. “Yes, it's this damn code, I can't configure it correctly.” <<Then I am the one who works on a Saturday.>> I continue listening to insults and I lower my head letting out heavy air. I go to his room and see him with his arms crossed looking at the screen. "Leave it to me" I approach and read the codes “. Katherine told me that she invites us to the bar with her friends.” "Great, because I needed to get out" He stretches out in his chair and when I finished the code, he growls at me “. I hate you.” "You are welcome" I reply with a laugh ". So we go?" “Yes, of course” he gives me a look. I already know what he is going to tell me “Today is your night, Jake! Tonight you have to kiss her or sleep with her or both!” I put a hand to my face, embarrassed by his words “But that girl is waiting for you to take the first step. Or don't you want it?” Of course I wanted to, but I was terrified now that I might not be good for her. I could take the first step towards her and kiss her tonight. “But don't talk to her about computers, codes and your geeky movies, you'll scare her away.” "Well, there are girls who appreciate it." I defend myself as I cross my arms, annoyed. “Yes, but have you seen Katherine? Just talk to her about literature and things that don't make her run away from it” he raises a finger and lowers his head “. Which reminds me, that she will be scared when she sees your room.” "I am not going to take out the posters for my favorite movies." I reply, reproaching him. "Then use my room" he gets up from his chair and taps me on the shoulder ". Listen to me, Katherine and Bianca wouldn't date geeks like us, if you noticed, it's because we're attractive." I give him a push and he laughs and walks away. Even though Al denies it, he is also just as geeky as me, but he does not want anyone to know or his pride will go down with him. I text Jeremy that we are going to the bar and he says he is up to come with us. I will try to study a little before getting ready to go out.

While I try to concentrate on studying, I look at the computer. Hannah's last message is still etched in my mind. Before I could be happy knowing that I had contact with a family member. I do not want to think that it is like I lost my mother again and I was left alone without a family. Because I have Al, who is my best friend and therefore I should not feel alone. <<Although it was nice to be an older brother, I was happy to talk to my sister.>> I hear the door and get up, closing the notebook and documents. Opening the front door, I meet Jeremy. He was always the quick one of the three to get ready. "Hello," he greets and I let him in "Are you ready?" “Not yet, Jake isn’t” lbert comes out of the bathroom with the towel wrapped around his waist. Thank goodness there is not a girl living here or he would be in trouble ". I'm going to get dressed and Jake" he points out, looking at me badly "don't even think about wearing a sweatshirt, today is your night. I'll lend you a jacket.” I avoid complaining like a little child. I guess I will have to listen to Albert's advice today. "Okay Jeremy, I am going to take a shower, feel like you are at home while you are waiting for us" I tell him and I see that he does not answer me, as if he were distracted "Jer?" “What?” He looks at me, turning his head quickly “Oh, of course, I'll wait for you on the couch playing a little, can I?” "Sure." I indicate to the sofa despite having been here several times. I enter the bathroom noticing the heat that the hot water has left in the environment and I begin to undress, trying to see the tattoo that I had finished getting a few weeks ago. A pair of wings. The feathers were well detailed. It took the tattoo artist a long time to do it for me, but it was worth it. I thought I wanted something that reflected how I feel when I run through the streets, when I decided to go for a ride on the motorcycle or the car. Everything that at least I feel now after years of being bound by the laws for having been a child. Freedom. Some wings that would accompany me to remember that I can achieve everything I have been through. I still remember when Al joked that I had done it for “The Scouting Legion.” My level of geekiness was not that high... at the moment. "Maybe Al is right, Katherine would laugh at me if she knew all this." I sigh and turn on the water in the shower. I run my hands over some fresh parkour wounds. Lately because of stress I have been falling too much, it has never happened to me before. University, work, stopping talking to Hannah... My whole mind had become a whirlwind of thoughts, everything was supposed to be okay, but now it is like everything has come together.

I lean my back against the wall and close my eyes, trying to calm myself. This is my night with Katherine, I will not let my stress manipulate me. After tonight, it will all be worth it. I let the water slide over my body, calming me. “Jake! Unless you've gone down the drain, get out already!” Al shouts from the other side of the door and I open my eyes in surprise “It's one thing to be clean and another to have our water bill go up.” “I am finishing!” How long have I been in a trance? I try to finish washing my hair quickly and leave the bathroom, drying myself. “Cologne… deodorant… What else?” I am so nervous that I do not even remember how to fix one. "The condoms are in the third drawer of the towel cabinet." Al answers. “I do not mean that!” “I just want you to be prepared” he continues speaking from the other side of the door, “you don’t want to be a father so young, right?” I swallow hard thinking about his words. Of course I do not want to. I could not even lead a life as a father now! I think I am getting nervous now about nothing. I do not want to go to bed with Katherine after a bar. The moment has to be special. Romantic. I leave the bathroom and see Jeremy and Albert playing Soul Calibur on the console. “Hurry up, Jake. What were you supposed to be doing in the shower? Were you touching thinking about Katherine or what?” Al asks me between moans, as if he were experiencing the fight. “Dude, no!” “Of course not!” Jeremy and I shouted at the same time. “I don’t mean that in a bad way.” Al defends himself. I grab a cushion and threw it at his head, causing him to be distracted and Jeremy managed to defeat him. Albert looks at me and I shrug, as if it does not matter that I had helped Jeremy by cheating.

When I enter my room, I see my clothes neatly placed on the bed. I sigh thinking it was Al. The clothes there are some of the best I own and clearly there are not any sweatshirts selected in the set. "Just like my mother left my clothes." I comment a little awkwardly. Albert really wants to go, maybe he is waiting for Bianca to show up. I take off the towel and start to get dressed. As I put on my jeans, I notice a small bulge in the pockets. I take it out and see the condom packet. No. Not tonight. I want to plan it properly. I am sure she will understand. Maybe it will be a little strange for Katherine, but not for me, I do not want her to get the wrong idea about me, that because she is my first girlfriend, she sees me as desperate. I let my hair dry naturally, letting it stay messy. I finish by putting on the black jacket, which matches the white shirt I am wearing. I look at myself in the mirror. I guess now I understand what Katherine meant. I am not saying I am attractive, because I do not think so, I look more average, but the style I usually wear is like I came out of one of those teen movies where the school bad boy is. I am regretting it now, like I look ridiculous. Is this what Katherine only sees about me? And thinking about her again, I better send her a message. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Jake We are going to the bar now.

-----Katherine has connected-----

Katherine Perfect ❤️

Jake :) Is Bianca there?

Katherine No Why? Are you interested?

Jake No, I just wanted to know.

Katherine Uhu… Well she’s not there But I do 😉

Jake Ha ha. Alright… We are going now.

Katherine We are waiting ❤️❤️❤️

-----Katherine has disconnected----- ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

<<Have she gotten angry because of something I said?>> I ask myself trying to know the reason for that attitude now. Let’s not think badly of her now...

The three of us arrive at the bar and see Katherine's group and her friends at the same table as always. As we approach, Katherine's smile widens. “You are here!” She exclaims, pointing to the free seats. "Oh, the boy of the moment." jokes his friend, I think his name was John. "Shut up John." Katherine replies. “Hello everyone.” Albert greets and sits in the chair, leaning on the table. He looks at everyone and then looks at Katherine “And Bianca?” "He hasn't returned from her getaway yet." She answers as if nothing had happened. "Sorry Al, Bianca doesn't seem to care much about you" responds the brunette girl next to John. Silvia “. You know how she is, she has a glamorous life thanks to her father, she is... unattainable for a boy in your class. Going out with her as you is a big mistake.” “Yes, if Bianca had rejected me like that, I would be embarrassed.” John continues. If we compare ourselves to them, their clothes seem to be tailor-made. I see how Al tenses at that comment, as if they have offended him. I run my tongue over my lips, thinking about how to help him. I should shut them up. “You know: A man should never be ashamed that he has made a mistake, which means, in other words, that he is wiser today than yesterday.” “What are you trying to say with that?” Silvia raises an eyebrow. "At least he is not going to make the mistake of dating someone from your class again if that is what you think of him." I try to calm down while defending my friend “. You are not even better than anyone else in this bar.” Her friends remain silent, not daring to look at my face. "Let us better go, it was a mistake to have come." I get up from the table and then listen to Al. “If you wanted to humiliate us, you have done well with him, idiots.” I hear his chair and he follows me. “Bye!” Jeremy exclaims nervously. I try to calm down. My hand shakes after telling them that.

Al puts his arm around my shoulders and laughs. “Thanks for defending me man, although they are right, they are superior to us” Al looks at Jeremy and me “. But at least we are more handsome by nature, surely they have paid a surgeon for it.” We laugh as we walk away. “Jake!” I hear behind us. We turn and I see Katherine running towards us. I had completely forgotten about her. I am an idiot. I put more hands into the jacket, trying to calm myself with it. “I'm sorry, their ego has been boosted because big television shows have chosen them for journalism work.” “Aren't you afraid of being seen talking to me?” I ask him annoyed. “Hey” she runs her tongue over her lips, nervous “What if we sit at a table and talk about it?” I look at Albert and Jeremy. “Alright-“ “We're leaving” Al gives Jeremy a light blow on the arm, as if giving him to understand to leave us alone “, I still have codes to do.” “Yes, and I have to study for tomorrow” Jeremy also plays along “. See you at the University.” “Take good care of yourselves.” Al makes gun-like signs with his hands and I tell him to stop by moving my lips. Katherine laughs and I get more nervous. I hope she did not understand the message. “Come on?” She points to an empty table and we approach. I order something to drink and she leaves the glass she had on the table. She did not want to bother me like this, it is not her fault. "I hope you don't think badly of me” she says in an uncomfortable voice "I... I'm not like them, I mean, I don't care." "I know" I agree, squeezing the drink tightly “. But they have no right to talk to us that way.” "They haven't said anything about you" she rolls her eyes “. But understand, they have been raised in a different environment, it is normal for them to sometimes show their “pompous” side” she says making the gesture of the quotes “. But you are different, Jake, you have an elite job, you study literature, you are educated, you have a good car... for them you are one of- “ She remains silent. 'Of us'. I thought she was really different, but it is not like that. She thinks like them. I guess I got my hopes up for her too much and she turned out to be someone who cares about her image. "But I have earned it with my effort" I respond, annoyed ", everything I have has cost me a lot, my life has not been easy." “Then tell me so I can understand it.” I open my mouth to start speaking, but I close it quickly. No. I can't tell hrr that I am the bastard son of a man I do not consider my father because he has never been there. I cannot tell her that my mother had to raise me alone because her family left her behind when she became pregnant. I also cannot tell her about my sisters, I am sure she would ask a lot of questions and want to know about them. "I can not" I finally answer “. I am sorry.” Katherine sighs and leans back in her chair. I thought it would be a great night, but I ruined it. “I'm going to the bathroom...” Katherine gets up, leaving her bag. Which means she is not going to run away from me.

While I wait for her, I receive a message from my boss. Great, I cannot have a quiet weekend. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Malcolm Jake, there is a problem with the National Bank website and I have my employees busy. I know it was your day off, but it is urgent. Can you take care of it?

Jake Sure, as soon as I get home will fix it.

Malcolm But don't delay, I try to control it as best I can. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I go to answer him when I notice a drink falling on my leg. I look at the beer they dropped and look up. A boy with blonde hair and blue eyes looks at me coldly. His glass is slightly upside down, he clearly threw it at me, he did not drop it. "My apologies" he says with the cigarette between his lips ", I spilled it when I tripped." I avoid getting up from the table and yelling at him. I know he is not sorry by the way he looks down on me. The guy walks away with a laugh and I see him approach his friends. One of them, with a tattoo on his neck of a bat, laughs as he looks at me. Today there are only idiots in the bar. As soon as Katherine gets back, I am out of here. I grab a couple of napkins from the napkin holder and start drying my pants. “What happened?” Katherine asks me after having returned. “That idiot over there, the blonde one.” I point with my head. "Jake, let's go" I look up and see her nervous “. Suddenly I lost the desire to be here.” I see her pick up her bag quickly and I get up from the chair, following her. We pass by the group and the guy from before speaks again. "Will you replace me with a cheap version of me, Kitty?" He asks her with a voice with contempt. I look at Katherine and she pulls me, pushing the guy away. She does not say anything, she just walks. I then decide to accompany her home after what happened, I think it is better this way.

We are silent during the car ride. The background music at least makes the atmosphere less heavy. “Aren't you going to ask me about that boy?” Katherine asks me, with a weak voice. "I thought you would rather forget it than remember it" I respond with a quick glance, smiling at her “. Do not worry, you will be home very soon.” “Thanks Jake…” “It is no big deal.” We finally arrive and I park. That is when she gets close to me and kisses me. I am slow to react, but eventually I place my hands on her back, pulling her to me. Katherine pulls away and I see that her lipstick has rubbed off a little. I must have her mark on my lips. “Would you like to go up?” She asks me whispering. There are two reasons to reject the offer: the first, that I do not have protection and the second, that the job demands me. “I… I am sorry, I received a message from my boss and-“ "They need you" she separates disappointed “. Then another day and… I'm sorry for what happened tonight.” "It is alright" I reply, squeezing the steering wheel ", you do not have to apologize." She smiles and leaves another kiss on my lips. “See you tomorrow Jake.” She gets out of the car and I watch her enter the apartments. I look at me in the rearview mirror. I see that my lips are stained with carmine. Our first kiss was not what I expected, but at least we kissed. I start the car back home with a smile. At least I am going to work knowing that it is official that we are together.

I finish fixing the code at five in the morning. Tired, I go to bed ready to sleep. I would have liked to have dreamed about her and the kiss we gave each other. Instead, my dreams are dragged into the past, remembering when I was left totally alone. I was only thirteen years old when they told me that my mother had died. In high school, studying with the rest of my classmates. "Jake?" I notice how they move me while I hear my name. I open my eyes and meet Al's nervous gaze. I have never seen him like this. “What us going on?” I ask still asleep. “You have to see this. Come on!” He pulls me out of bed by the arm, making me walk. I keep asking him questions and he takes me to the living room, turning up the volume on the television. “The mother of the young woman found murdered in her apartment, Frida Begum, has not yet wanted to speak to the press about the discovery in her apartment.” says the reporter as they show the teacher. “Bianca's mother?” I ask, even knowing the answer “What do they mean Bianca is dead?” “No… I don't know…” I see how Al puts his hands to his head, nervous “Shit… How- What happened? She was fine when I left her! I swear!” "Calm down Al" I place my hands on his shoulders, looking into his eyes ", I am sure they will find whoever did this to her." When he goes to talk to me, there is a knock on the door. “Sit down, I will go.” I advise him and he nods. Albert sits on the couch, moving his leg nervously. I open the door and see a man in his forties in front of my door and, next to him, a couple of police officers. "Jake Miller?" He asks me, fixing his brown eyes on my green ones, almost as if they were penetrating me, analyzing me. “Yes, Is something wrong?” I ask with fear. It is been a long time since I had face to face with a police officer. “I'm Agent Connors and we're here to take you and Albert Fischer to the police station for some questions about the murder of Bianca Fetcher and the disappearance of Katherine Beinh.” My breath catches when I hear his words.

Katherine was missing.

And I was the suspect.

Chapter 2

#duskwood #duskwood jake #duskwood everbyte #duskwood game #everbyte studio #everbyte game #duskwood fanfic

4 notes · View notes

doubleshotofsomething · 4 years ago

Text

To Hell & Back

Part Two: “Lucky for me, your kind of heaven’s been to hell & back”

Summary: You still hate Bucky. But you need him to keep you from going to jail... So, what’s the harm in inviting him over to dinner?

Prompt: “I don’t want to live on this planet anymore.”

Warnings: Angst?? (i think). Probably typos( which will be fixed). Implied violence.

Pairings: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Part one [In case you missed it]

----

It's Saturday.

Your day off. Well, what used to be your day off until it was turned into a family therapy session.

Well... Not an actual therapy session. It is literally just dinner with your family, including your sister's husband - a man you refuse to identify as your brother in law for reasons that will end in you being called the j-word. The husband, because he's the only son-in-law your parents have, has been dubbed the "referee" of the Saturday Sessions.

Each session, since you've been discharged, has made committing murder seem more and more appealing.

So appealing, that you're standing in front of your neighbour's door with a basket of muffins and a please-keep-me-from-committing-felonies smile.

Bucky, because he just spent the afternoon searching for a new bar, is standing on the other side of the door. Both confused and frightened to see you at his door voluntarily.

"Is there a bomb in that basket?" He asks, eyes roaming over you suspiciously. "Believe me, it's not gonna work."

You blink at him, then at the basket. Then back at him. "Why would I put a bomb in a muffin basket and then hold it?"

He raises a sceptical eyebrow at you.

You huff. "Fine, they're poisoned. I accidentally added laxatives while making them-"

"Accidentally?"

"Yes, accidentally-" you glare at him. "-they're not for you. They're from us."

He blinks at you, confused. You haven't spoken to him, actually spoken to him, for a few months. You avoid him like he has a disease and when your paths do cross, you just glare at him like he threw your cat into on coming traffic.

It's been a few days since the coffee machine incident. He has a brand new one - better than the last one - sitting on his kitchen counter, waiting for him to develop the courage to give it to you. It should be easy. He has mastered the art of making amends.

But... He can't, for some reason, bring it to you.

"Wait-" he frowns, your words finally registering in his head, "-did you just say from us?"

You set the basket down. "So, remember when you broke my one shot at happiness?"

"Oh god." He forgot how dramatic you are, as well.

"Yeah, you can fix that little error by being a doll and-" you pause, then frown, struggling to find the right words.

"Muffin poisoned your tongue?"

"I'm trying to ask you to be my plus one for tonight's dinner-" you grit your teeth, your blood beginning to boil. "-at my parents house."

You didn't look him in the eye when you said that. And by the sounds of it, he doubts this is something he should be going to. Or something you should be going to. Not if it brings out this side of you.

"Who are the muffins for?"

They were for your sister. You broke her nose last week, which was never your intention, and the guilt has been eating you up alive since. The punch was meant for her asshole husband.

"You coming or not?"

"Let me grab a wine and the keys."

"We have muffins. No need to waste your good wine on mediocre tastes."

"I'm bringing the wine."

"If you make us stop to pick out flowers, I will watch porn with the volume on full blast every night for a week."

"Why are you always so violent?"

"So, how bad is it?" Bucky asks.

You've been in the car for a half an hour, because you chose the busiest route and the most congested during rush hour, and that's the first thing either of you have uttered since you politely dragged him out of his apartment.

You shrug. "Three roads lead to this one, so we'll be here another half hour."

"I mean the situation-" he drums his fingers against the wheel. "-you literally chose to be in a car with me, for the longest time possible. Either you want to get there late or you don't want to get there at all."

"Maybe I just like spending time with you."

Bucky scoffs, but doesn't question you further.

The car is silent, aside from the traffic outside, and you could almost relax. For just a moment, you could close your eyes and imagine you're somewhere else.

But you can't. Because you're not. You're on your way to a dinner that shouldn't be happening and is only happening because you're part of your neighbour's redemption list.

Because he just had to have a conscious.

"I punched my sister last week," you mumble.

Bucky wants to laugh. He wants to laugh so badly. He has met your sister, a handful of times - at the hospital, outside your room and outside your apartment door.

Every time she'd come over, she would knock hard enough to make him think she's part of SWAT team. And each time, he would could hear you scramble to switch off all devices that could alert her of your presence inside.

One time, you'd both arrived a few minutes after each other. His door was closer and already open, so you shoved your grocery in his hand and dived into his apartment to hide from your sister. He had to pretend he hasn't seen you since you left for work , and that the packet of sanitary pads that fell out were for his girlfriend.

He didn't have one.

He wants to laugh, because he doesn't like her at all. But he doesn't, because she's your sister. "What did she do?"

"She married an asshole-" you scoff. "-and decided to get in the way and I tried to punch said asshole."

At this, he grins. "And you need me there because?"

"I need you to keep me from trying to kill him," you begrudgingly admit. "I'm too high maintenance for prison."

"How bad is this guy that you need me to help you not kill him?"

"Bad enough that I'm gonna need you to park a few blocks away from the house," you turn to look at him, his confused eyes meeting yours for a quick second. "I told them we're taking the bus."

"Wow."

"Which means we only get to spend less than two hours there, if you drive a little slow-" you pause when he drives passed a McDonald's. "-hey, can we stop and get milkshake?"

He deadpans. "We have dinner plans with your parents."

"I get that you and them might have gotten along since you decided to be a hero," you glare at him. "But they're not as cool as the hospital visits made them seem."

Your parents have invited him over to dinner a handful of times, and each time he had to decline. You and him weren't on the best of terms, and he didn't want to make things worse by showing up for dinner without your knowledge.

He knows, first hand, that a few interactions aren't enough to give the full depth of a person. But he saw how devastated they were, how heartbroken they were, at the sight of tubes and needles sticking out of you.

He doesn't believe, he can't believe, for a second that they're as bad as you say they are.

But he won't argue with you. Not about this. "We'll get milkshake after."

"Hey, remember that coffee machine you br-"

"Oh, fuck you!"

***

You're not a fan of wine. At least, not the wine Bucky brought to the dinner.

An hour into the dinner and you've already had enough glasses to have Bucky worried. The wine is halfway to empty by the time dessert rolls in, and when your sister's husband clears his throat, you abandon the glass and drink straight from the bottle.

The second hour into the dinner is where things got interested. Interesting enough for Bucky to take the bottle from you before you could throw it at someone's head. Mainly because he wanted to throw it at someone's head. Your sister's husband's head to be specific.

Just as your mother gets up to start making tea for the muffins you brought, Bucky is the first on his feet and the first to use the 'we have to get going before we miss the bus' excuse.

You grin at him, vision slightly hazy from the wine you drank on an empty stomach.

"Mhmm," you hum as you cling into him to get to your feet, "the bus. We gotta- the bus. Bah-yeee."

"I'll make sure she gets home safe," he promises to your parents and they believe him.

Hell, you believe him. If there's one thing you can trust your neighbour to do, it's to save your life. But not your coffee machine.

He guides back to the car, which is parked exactly where you told him to, and he's never been happier to have listened to you. You sing all the way back, some ridiculous song about when you're fat and old, and you're the most content he's ever seen you.

Drunk off wine, eyes glassy and smile wide, as you try to mimic his steps. You sigh when you get into your seat, even though you fight him on opening your own door, and fumble lazily with your seat belt until he helps you clip it in.

Your struggle to find a comfortable position, but forget all about that when he parks the car outside your favourite coffee shop. You're out before he can even unclip his seatbelt and you're inside before he makes it to the door.

"Hi," you whisper-yell as you lean against the counter. "Pssst. Hi. Hello."

The barista blinks at you. Bucky cuts in before he can get a word out. "We'll take coffee. Filter. And anything that's bread-"

"-don't listen to him, he breaks hearts for a living. Sometimes he rips them out." I jab your pointer finger against the countertop. "I will take the strongest coffee you've got. I'm in the mood for bad decisions and-"

"We'll be at the booth, in the back." Bucky gently pries you from the counter. "One coffee and two bottles of water-"

You try to smack his hands away. "Why must you be so- Barnes, I swear to god, I will take your parking space."

He shoves you into the booth, then takes a seat opposite you. You attempt to make a break for the counter, but the glare he fixes you with is enough to keep you in your place.

It should scare you. The look he gives you. You know what he is capable of, without mad scientists to control him, you know the damage he's done. It takes a special kind of strength to face people like the flag smashers, and a special kind of crazy to go after them.

Bucky is both. And yet, his glare doesn't scare you. So much so, that you return it.

"I hate your brother-in-law-"

"Sister's husband," you cut in to correct him. "I refuse to recognise him as my anything."

He nods. "Right. So, let me get this straight-"

Bucky pauses as the barista sets down the coffee, the water, two croissants, some breadsticks and a garlic roll. When he's satisfied that there's nothing else, he leaves you alone with Bucky and the breads.

"You got work tomorrow-" he puts sugar into your coffee and stirs, before handing it to you. "-so you're gonna need to eat as much, so that it absorbs all that wine."

You glare at him but still do as he says. He's right and you'd rather sulk than admit it.

"So," he clears his throat to get your attention. "Your sister is an asshole, that married an asshole. And your parents are enablers of all that bullshit?"

You nod, practically shoving the garlic bread into your mouth. You didn't touch the food your mother cooked and, other than that milkshake Bucky bought you, you haven't had anything to eat all day.

"Instead of just sending you to therapy-" he scrunches his face in disgust at the thought. "-I can't fucking believe I'm advocating for that, but instead of paying for therapy. They do that? Host a dinner, sit a circle and kumbaya the problems away?"

Taking a sip from your coffee, you continue to nod. "Is it helping?"

He frowns, meeting your eyes. "What?"

"The mandated sessions-"you swallow. "-I heard you and Wings talking about it."

Thin walls. Shared balconies. Despite not being in each other's life, both of you know more than enough because of your apartments.

Your balcony and his are separated by a small barrier, but you can still hear his conversations - and visa versa- if you leave your glass door open enough when he's out there.

The wall that separates your apartment is thin enough for him to pick up on your habits. You don't think you're a creature of habit, but he would disagree.

He can tell, just from your foot steps, what you're going to watch or do in the living room. From the little sounds you make, he can tell which series you're binge watching for the umpteenth time and which one is on just for background noise.

If you weren't a creature of habit, he wouldn't have found you in time. You wouldn't be sitting in front of him, asking about his wellbeing, instead of dealing with yours.

"Wings is Captain now," he corrects, and you accept the deflection.

You would never overstep, or push. Not with him. Never with him.

"If Captain, why Wings?"

Narrowing his eyes, he pushes the bread sticks closer to you. "Fine, Captain Wings."

Again, you obey the silent instruction.

"Where were we-"

"We were plotting an asshole's abduction," you tell him, "and then dropping him off at the bottom of the Atlantic ocean. If that's not available, then maybe near Dyer Island."

He raises an eyebrow at you. “Why would we drop your sister’s husband on an Island?”

"It's a place, with a shitload of great white sharks."

"And you know this because?"

"I like to always be prepared."

"For what?" His brows furrow. "Do you just know random places to dump people that–"

You cut in. "–will lead to an inevitable death by natural causes? Yes."

He stares at you. Actually stares. Openly, at you. He can't remember the last time he did that, looked at you, for no other reason than to just look.

You didn't always hate him. When he first moved into your apartment building, and the landlord introduced you too, you were indifferent. He didn't think you knew who he was, most people don't at first glance, so he was relieved. Indifference was definitely better than everything else.

That was until you walked passed him and Sam in the lobby of the building, a week after he moved in.

"Sarge–" you nodded at him, as you checked your mail. Then nodded at Sam as you made your way out of the building. "–Wings."

You knew, you always knew who he was, and just didn't care. That was refreshing, to say the least.

The hate only came that night, or the following morning, he wasn't sure. All Bucky knows is, he meddled, and now you hate him for it. For saving you.

He's tried to talk to you about it. Countless of times, he's tried, and each time you hate him a little bit more. Or so it seems.

He wants to talk about it now. It's obvious in the way he's looking at you, like he can't believe you're here, in front of him. You can't either, but you won't ever admit that to him.

Hell would sooner freeze over before you actually admitted that maybe, just maybe, he should have meddled sooner.

You won't. So, instead, you put down the bread stick and sit back. "I know a really cool coffee place... If you still need a new place to hang."

It's an olive branch. You don't ever say what you really mean, he knows that, and he smiles at that little fact. That he knows that, he knows you.

"Is the barista as dramatic as I hear?"

"Only to strangers that break down her doors," you shrug. "Oh, and guys who break her coffee machine–"

"You're never gonna let that go, are you?"

You grin. Because you're just as petty as he is.

---

Tags: @sunflowerxbarnes , @ginger-swag-rapunzel , @arctic-duchess

#Bex's 1.5K Meme Challenge #Bucky Barnes #marvel masterlist #x reader #reader insert #bucky barnes x reader #bucky x you #marvel writing challenge #part 2 #neighbours au #enemiestolovers au #bucky fanfic #series #mcu x reader

59 notes · View notes

yehet-me-up · 4 years ago

Note

*busts through the door like I'm the Kool-Aid man* BONJOUR FUCKERS I'M BACK!!! It is I, the Theatrical Gay Anon™! I hope you're ready to endure my endless babbling for a bit cuz I've got lots to say holy shit. Consider this part 1 of like, 1000 cuz I think Tumblr got rid of the submissions feature. I apologize in advance for the spam hehe.

Okay, with that out of the way. Ms. Yehet-Me-Up, may I call you Sarah? Sarah, what the fuck!? I can't even rn. I I give you a simple suggestion, no expectations behind it. I say "Hey, don't you think it'd be cool if Zitao was in the Exodus Mall universe?" to which you said "Yeah, that'd be neat, I might do that. Perhaps make him work at an Irish pub or something" and then I flip out with gratitude and excitement thinking you're gonna do like, a DRABBLE. 500 words at MOST -Theatrical Gay Anon

Imagine my SHOCK, my STUPEFACTION, upon realizing that you wrote OVER TEN THOUSAND WORDS about Huang Zitao aka the wind beneath my wings, the rain to my drought, the corny joke to my Junmyeon. And not only that! But you did this A MONTH AGO. I could've been reading this for so long and I had no idea! How foolish am I? I can't believe you wrote all of this based off of a silly little suggestion I made. I feel like bowing over how not worthy I am Wayne's World style -Theatrical Gay Anon

NOW IN REGARDS TO THE CONTENT OF THIS MASTERPIECE OH MY GOD WHERE DO I EVEN BEGIN!? I am floored by your preeminence. First things first, the title? Perfect. Full disclosure, I suck at titles. I've been writing for over a decade now and I'm still shit with titles. It's so hard to come up with just a few words to encapsulate everything you wrote but you do it SO WELL. The moodboard? Amazing. I've always loved that picture of Zitao and it fits so well with the pub setting -Theatrical Gay Anon

I'm afraid you've written "Fractions of Tomorrow" so well that I don't see there being a need for anyone to write anything else...ever. Stories? CANCELED. Poetry? CANCELED. Biographies? CANCELED. It's all over folks. Sarah has written The Best Thing Ever. We've peaked as a society. After I finish writing these asks I'm gonna become a hermit in the woods and make friends with all of the woodland creatures that inhabit it. -Theatrical Gay Anon

But seriously though, I love absolutely everything about this story. As a Zitao fan, I'm used to getting breadcrumbs. Not a lot of ppl write fics about him. I can count on one hand how many long fics of his you can find on Tumblr. But THIS?? This was no breadcrumb, this was a whole fucking bakery. And it all appeals to me so much oh my god? The sappiness of it all, the flowery prose, the rebellious rejection of cynicism, it's all so beautiful I want to marry it. -Theatrical Gay Anon

If I discussed all of the sentences in this fic that made me giggle with joy and kick my feet around I'd be here all day so keep in mind this is just a FRACTION of the ones I loved but I couldn't go without mentioning at least some of them so here we go. "It’s not his first time here, but it’s his first time paying attention" SHUT UP this line is go good it's so simple yet so nuanced I adore it. Seriously, why hasn't anyone hired you to write a screenplay? -Theatrical Gay Anon

"He wonders if you ironed the collar of your shirt to be that precise or if you simply move through the world without acquiring any wrinkles" God, this line is so CUTE it's DISGUSTING he's fond of the reader's un-wrinkled clothes that's such a specific thing to like and is totally the type of thing I've done with the ppl I've crushed on throughout my life. -Theatrical Gay Anon

"‘Zitao,’ he says finally. ‘Cute.’ You say" this is such a little thing but I love that you included his full name in this. I love his full name so much it sounds really pretty. Whenever I hear him refer to himself as "Huang Zitao" in interviews my heart soars. Hearing him speak Mandarin in general is a delight as well. It's an audibly gorgeous language and any racist who says otherwise can EAT MY ENTIRE ASS -Theatrical Gay Anon

"For someone who’s been in love for as long as you can remember she fights awfully hard against Baekhyun’s romantic nature" DEAR GOD I LOVE THESE TWO! I love these movie loving lovesick fools. I love that everyone in the world knows they love each other except them. I love seeing bits and pieces of their story throughout this written universe. I can't wait to see it all come together in Baekhyun's Exodus Mall fic. It's gonna be GLORIOUS -Theatrical Gay Anon

Also! I know you enjoyed my song recs that I thought fit perfectly with All Our Broken Places so here are some for when the Baek x Hitchcock fic drops. I know it's not done yet but I just *know* what it's gonna be like I can feel it in my bones. "Sidekick" by Walk the Moon and "Tongue Tied" by Grouplove. As for Fractions of Tomorrow I knew right away what songs I'd pick. "Dreams" by The Cranberries, "Jumpstarted" by Jukebox the Ghost and "Don't Stop Believing" by Journey -Theatrical Gay Anon

Gosh, this fic filled me with so much energy and joy I feel like a toddler on caffeine. But I really should sleep now though. It's gotten so late that I can see the sunrise peaking up sdksdksl. I'll see ya soon! I will be spamming you with more compliments about this fic once I wake up though! - Theatrical Gay Anon

Hi! I'm back. Okay, now where was I? Oh yeah, I was talking about some of my favorite lines from the story. "‘Hey man, how’s it going?’ Baekhyun reaches out and does a complex handshake with the man before you. ‘Oh, you know. Just working at the salt mines,’ Tao says with a laugh." I LOVE that you made Baek the one Zitao was close with. I miss the beef brothers so much. I'll never forgive SM for what they did to OT12. They were all such good friends 😔 -Theatrical Gay Anon

"‘I’m not sure.’ For a flash Tao’s eyes linger on you once more. ‘I think it would depend on the person.’ And then the bastard goes and winks at you." GOD, HE WOULD DO SOMETHING LIKE THIS! HE'S SUCH A SHAMELESS FLIRT I HATE HIM *narrator voice* This was of course a huge a lie, he in fact loved Zitao immensely -Theatrical Gay Anon

"‘Sweetheart, I’m everyone’s type.’" You've captured Zitao's unlimited confidence so well and that makes me really happy. It's one of my favorite things about him. The man truly loves himself and I think that's awesome -Theatrical Gay Anon

"Tao looks at you through his lashes, bending close enough that you can feel his breath on your lips when he speaks. ‘Words are just the appetizer, darling. I prefer to have an entire feast.’ 'Any other questions or can I grab your orders?’" ASDKDSDSL SO YOU'RE JUST GONNA SAY THAT PANTY DROPPER LINE AND GO BACK TO BUSINESS AS USUAL ZITAO???? HUH??? IS THAT WHAT WE'RE GONNA DO??? -Theatrical Gay Anon

"‘Oh, nothing.’ He looks like the cat that caught the canary. ‘I just love being right.’" Something I love about EXO fic writers (myself included lol) is that despite all of the different ways they'll write the other members, there is one member who is always written the same and that's Baekhyun. He will always be written as a cheeky little shit cuz he *is* a cheeky little shit. That's just who he is. Messing with ppl is a favorite past time of his. -Theatrical Gay Anon

"'So, love, huh? There’s not some girlfriend or boyfriend of yours waiting for you at home?’" Thank you for not being heteronormative with the "are you dating someone?" convo. I know it might not seem like much but I really appreciate it. -Theatrical Gay Anon

"The beginning of love is always a lightning bolt. If that’s all it ever is you never have to deal with being knocked on your ass by the resulting thunderstorm" OOF, this one got me. So very true. The beginning of love is so scary! -Theatrical Gay Anon

"I could argue that anarchy still is love. Love of your beliefs and love of a person or a place or a thing so much that you’re willing to fight for it" OKAY BUT PASSIONATE LEATHER JACKET WEARING ANARCHIST ZITAO IN A ROCK BAND IS SUCH AN ATTRACTIVE CONCEPT!!! There's nothing sexier than a bad boi that will hate capitalism with you! He'd probably be the one to give ppl rides to protests and stuff I LOVE IT -Theatrical Gay Anon

"If we say love is a feeling, who’s to say that we aren’t in love? If we decide it’s an action then which one is it? A kiss or a commitment or - maybe it’s nothing more complicated than putting words to the way I feel when you look at me?" Listen I don't mean to be dramatic or anything (wait, who am I kidding? I'm literally the Theatrical Gay Anon being dramatic is like my Thing) but if a guy ever said that to me my trans boi pussy would be open for business IMMEDIATELY

Alright, so, uh Final Thoughts. This may be my new favorite work of yours, and no it's not just cuz it's got my ultimate bias in it lmao. This year has been so shitty and it's made my depression + anxiety reach the highest possible levels but reading this, this love story filled with hope and certainty despite not knowing what the future will hold for them, made this year seem easier to cope with. Thank you so much for making this, it means the world to me. -Theatrical Gay Anon

ALRIGHT, LAST ASK AND THEN I'LL SHUT UP I PROMISE but I personally headcanon that Double Shot + Zitao stayed together till the very end. They didn't get married cuz they hate formalities but they got matching tattoos and even when they're old and grey you can still them clear as day on their wrists. When they're asked how they met no one believes their answer lol. And when Double Shot died of old age before Zitao he would sing her favorite song by her grave every Saturday -Theatrical Gay Anon

OKAY SO I know I said I was done and I know I've already sent in like, 30 bajillion asks but I'm curious does Yifan or Luhan also work at the Irish pub?? Or do they work somewhere else in the mall? Inquiring minds want to know -Theatrical Gay Anon

When I tell you this made my entire month (when you sent it weeks ago, I’ve been hanging onto these because they seriously bring me SO much joy holy crap) I am not remotely kidding j;oaisjdflkasdjfa

I am absolutely going to put on these song recs while I work on the next chapter!

a;osdfjlaksdfjasl the fact that you stayed up late to read this warms my heart so much. It reminds me of all the times I stayed up til the ass crack of dawn reading fanfics because I simply could NOT stop reading, so the fact that you enjoyed this like that makes me helllllaaaa emo 🥰

I just??? 2020 was indeed such a long year and affected my energy and creativity and honestly don’t really remember writing this hahaha. I kind of go into a fugue state with these longer fics and they just EMERGE. So to see you reflecting back some of what I wrote allows me to enjoy the process so much more. Makes writing and tumblr fun and I seriously wish everyone writing and creating could have someone as passionate and thoughtful and hilarious as you hyping them up 🌟 it honestly feels like a GIFT and I will absolutely keep writing this series and hoping to be worthy of it 😘

We will definitely get to see more of these two in the finale fic! I got into EXO after Tao, Yifan, and Luhan left so I’m not quite as familar with their personalities, but I could definitely see Yifan working at the US Bank haha. Business suit by day and partying/flirting by night. As for Luhan I feel like he’d work somewhere like the bookstore or the music store?? somewhere quieter and more contemplative.

Thank you again for sending this and for being you <3 I hope 2021 is a wonderful year for you and that you know how AMAZING you are 💖💖💖💖💖

#asks #theatrical gay anon

5 notes · View notes

punkscowardschampions · 5 years ago

Text

Jimmy & Janis

Jimmy: what are you doing tonight? Jimmy: the answer is saving my life, if you need a clue but Janis: dramatic Janis: but I do know first aid so 👍 Janis: should be good? Jimmy: dress like you're going to dinner with a casual racist, his fancy woman & some unloved kids then meet me at my house for Ian's clocking off time Jimmy: alright? Janis: oh no Janis: really? Janis: it's your birthday, Ian, could do anything you want Jimmy: he's been there done that, we skipped it Jimmy: but my postcard did arrive so 👍 Janis: it's nice he missed me and all but Janis: ick Janis: alright Jimmy: you ain't actually invited by him Jimmy: just me Jimmy: don't be too 💔 Janis: shh Janis: such a hater Janis: do you actually want me to dress like a respectful church girl or am I meant to come full slut, like what's your vibe here Jimmy: bring a bag big enough to stuff the 🐶 in, she is & she'll wreck the place quicker than even Bob could do Jimmy: as for what you wear, express yourself, babe Janis: 😂 Janis: is that white people code for ethnic Janis: bit #problematic Jimmy: there's no code Jimmy: or dress code Jimmy: you hate him, you know what to do Jimmy: it ain't what we wear that matters Janis: but miraculously, I don't completely hate you Janis: not tryna fuck it up in the wrong ways, like Jimmy: he can't stab me with a salad fork or do me over with a corkscrew in the middle of a restaurant Jimmy: gutted for him Janis: political correctness gone mad Janis: but true Jimmy: we'll leave before his girlfriend does so he can't say or do owt Jimmy: don't worry Janis: trust he's not hit you yet then for going AWOL Janis: not very family-friendly Jimmy: she was here when I got in so nah Jimmy: maybe she'll move herself proper & really fuck his life up Janis: 💕 Jimmy: it'd be a first but he's one year closer to 💀 & that's at least 20 off by northern standards Janis: might've been hasty, not having you around to raise them for a whole week Janis: rush her up the aisle, Ian Jimmy: he don't have a shotgun license 💔 too 😭😭 to be allowed Jimmy: unlucky dad Jimmy: he could try knocking her up but she ain't that much younger than him so Janis: grim Janis: happens sometimes Janis: not putting it past my mother to have a last hurrah Jimmy: don't Jimmy: I ain't raising no baby for him Jimmy: got enough on Janis: she'll have to at least do the breatfeeding bit Janis: pull your weight, evil stepmum Jimmy: 🍼 as soon as Jimmy: that's how we were all churned out Jimmy: no hippies here Janis: brave, the health visitors practically crucify you for that Jimmy: like he's bothered Jimmy: parent of the year 🏆 Janis: all this talk of babies is giving me ptsd Jimmy: shut up then Jimmy: I need to be able to touch you later Janis: charming chat as ever Jimmy: 💕 Janis: good thing you don't need it Janis: already miss you so Jimmy: if you need it you know I will Jimmy: I miss you too Janis: not gonna make you seduce me in your hour of need, babe Jimmy: it ain't all about him though Jimmy: I wanna see you Janis: I know Janis: it's been so shit being back Janis: worse than I reckoned Jimmy: & so quick Jimmy: I thought we'd have time to take a fucking breather at least Janis: yeah Janis: no chance Janis: nan had to kick mum out earlier it was such a farce Jimmy: 🙄 Jimmy: I didn't even ask Jimmy: sorry Janis: no big, I ain't asked how work was either Janis: I wouldn't speak to her, did my best not to listen either so meh Jimmy: still Jimmy: we don't have to do this Jimmy: now or ever Janis: I wanna Janis: not like, this is exactly how I'd choose to spend my saturday nights wanna Janis: but if you have to then I'm gonna Jimmy: I get it, you wanna see what Bob chooses when I let him dress himself no saying nah to nowt Jimmy: same Janis: 😂 Janis: I'm sure it'll beat whatever the fuck dad of the year would put him in Jimmy: he'll probably wear something of mine & whatever you've left on my floor Jimmy: he don't hate us for going like Cass does Janis: how pissed is she Janis: like do I need to wear protection from salad forks too Jimmy: not as bad as she was when she worked out mum was gone Jimmy: but as close as I've seen her Janis: shit Janis: like, knew she would but still Janis: how are you making it up to her, got a plan yet? Jimmy: I don't know where or how to start Jimmy: my room is trashed which is 👍 Janis: 😕 Janis: we'll brainstorm Jimmy: & I don't mean Gracie don't know what to wear, I mean my door won't close 'cause it's been booted Jimmy: tah for stepping in on that one, Ian Jimmy: A+ parenting Jimmy: bribes ain't gonna work this time Janis: might've helped Janis: the mature response Janis: we'll think of something, swear Jimmy: wouldn't be surprised Jimmy: like I won't be when nowt works to sort this Jimmy: playing happy families with whoever the fuck she is ain't gonna help Janis: I'm sorry Janis: I shouldn't have let you come Jimmy: you'd be sorry if you tried to stop me Janis: 🔪or 😭 Jimmy: I'm serious Jimmy: I wanted to come Jimmy: I needed to Janis: I know Jimmy: I can't be her brother, her mum & her fucking dad Jimmy: she's old enough to get it Janis: yeah, but she ain't old enough to leave herself Janis: like I get it Janis: when my brothers and sisters got to leave I hated them Jimmy: & I get it Jimmy: I hate my mum for that Janis: yeah Janis: but you came back Janis: so she can't stay mad forever Jimmy: it don't mean shit when she knows I wanna go again Jimmy: that I will Janis: you're not gonna just desert them though Jimmy: how she sees it is I don't love her enough to stay which makes me as bad as my mum Jimmy: worse 'cause I was there for that Janis: she knows it's more complicated than that though too Janis: even if she hates you for that it's still true Jimmy: yeah but she also ain't cut her hair since 'cause she got one the day before Jimmy: she's a kid still Janis: yeah Janis: so are you Jimmy: piss off am I Jimmy: I don't get to be Janis: how long can you cope with being mum, dad and brother so she gets to keep being one, even a bit Jimmy: as long as I have to Janis: okay then Janis: then we'll find a way to make her believe and know that Jimmy: easy to say Jimmy: fuck knows how we're gonna do it Janis: well no Janis: but we got time Janis: she ain't beyond hope yet Jimmy: can you just Jimmy: be here now Janis: um not to be a dickhead but not right now Janis: give me about half an hour, then I can Jimmy: okay Janis: had to go home, ain't I Janis: got fuck all here Jimmy: I would buy you new shit to avoid that Jimmy: you should've said Janis: nah, it's fine, I can be stealth Jimmy: such an athlete yeah I know Jimmy: always going on about it you Janis: you know you ain't been complaining Jimmy: only 'cause you'd fight me & you're so 💪 Jimmy: can't handle the loss right now Janis: better shh then, boy Jimmy: alright Janis: you know we ain't taking nothing but Ws tonight Jimmy: yeah Janis: teamwork Janis: okay Jimmy: 🥇 or nowt Jimmy: I ain't forgot Janis: it'll be shit but for him too Janis: realistically the best I can offer Jimmy: shitter for him than the rest of us is all I want Janis: 👍 Janis: lbr, me being there = night ruined so Janis: anything else is 🍒 Jimmy: it'll be interesting to see how he tries to handle you being there when she is Janis: gotta ascertain if she too, is a casual racist, I suppose Jimmy: Cass wants to bring her mate & he ain't white either so Jimmy: you're getting close to surrounded, Ian 💔 Janis: and when you're the foreigner Janis: headfuck Jimmy: exactly Jimmy: 🎻🎻🎻 Jimmy: what would buble do, dad? ask yourself Jimmy: already accepted him as his lord & savior Janis: is he a racist Janis: damn Janis: what a loss 💔 Jimmy: don't you have like a little book of racists in your house Jimmy: I was hoping you'd know Jimmy: should cover the 'celebs' at least Janis: a who's who of who to avoid Janis: sadly not Janis: how 'woke' are you now, lads Jimmy: gap in the market there Jimmy: crack on, babe Jimmy: get even richer Janis: what you chattin' Janis: omw to getting disowned here Jimmy: all the more reason to get busy with it then Jimmy: I ain't funding no #lavish life Janis: 😱 Jimmy: should've backed Pete 🐎 Jimmy: be his groupie by now if you'd grafted Janis: well you did kind of ruin that for me Jimmy: well I'm giving you a second chance Jimmy: 🎣 him from the CG I have Jimmy: I know how to graft Janis: yeah? Jimmy: he starts next week Jimmy: get your shit together Janis: I bet you just told him there was fit girls that work there Janis: who am I to ruin his job satisfaction Jimmy: It ain't my fault he'll be 😍 for my esteemed pink haired colleague after one shift Janis: 😒 Janis: shut up Jimmy: come on, he's actually got a type Jimmy: & when he hears her sing he'll be 🤤 Janis: I said shut up Janis: so rude Jimmy: 💔💔 Jimmy: get some vocal coaching & a box dye Jimmy: you've got time Janis: I can sing fine Janis: it's not hard Jimmy: me too but fine ain't 🤤🤤 Jimmy: you've got the nose ring already that's 1 point Janis: 😑 Janis: don't test me 'cos I have to come Jimmy: do yourself a tattoo while you're home you'll be well away Janis: I'm ignoring you now Janis: good day Jimmy: so mean you Jimmy: I'm being well helpful towards getting you on Pete Janis: you gave me false hope then snatched it away, you mean Jimmy: how? Janis: oh pete's gonna work with me again oh wait I've lowkey whored a bitch out for it Janis: 😒👌 Jimmy: you said that, I never Jimmy: she's got a boyfriend remember Janis: and he had a girlfriend, last I heard Janis: what's that matter, obviously Jimmy: I like working with 'em both Jimmy: that's it Jimmy: let me have my #dreamteam Janis: save me the love letter Janis: you're gross Jimmy: but I wanna write you one Jimmy: bit rude Janis: no you don't Janis: you wanna write pete and whatserface one on the back of a to-go Janis: you massive 🤓 Jimmy: yeah I do & no I don't Jimmy: if I tried to write one on their skin the way I do to you, I'd get sacked for a start Jimmy: or need a longer break than I'm allowed Janis: 💀 Jimmy: baby Jimmy: come on Janis: don't baby me, dickhead Jimmy: please be my BFF again 💕 Janis: literally have never been your bff Janis: Twix's only Jimmy: 😱 I'm wearing my half of the necklace right now Jimmy: 💔 Jimmy: wounded me Janis: lied for the jewellery and I'll do it again Janis: kinda girl I am Jimmy: brutal you Janis: you started it Jimmy: I started nowt Jimmy: like I told you, I was trying to help you ride Pete off into the sunset Janis: mhmm Jimmy: scroll up if your memory's gone Janis: my memory is fine Janis: you want him to be your work bff Jimmy: just 'cause they both annoy me less than the 99% of other colleagues and customers I ain't gonna buy them necklaces & form a #squad Janis: likely story Janis: 👍 Janis: got form, you Jimmy: you don't count Jimmy: broke all my normal rules for you Janis: really Jimmy: obviously Janis: hmm Jimmy: you know it, don't be pretending you need to think on it Janis: hold on Janis: I'm here, wish me 🍀 Jimmy: 👌 Jimmy: not that you should need it Jimmy: 🥇 at being stealth or not Janis: [suitable amount of time later] Janis: ugh Janis: they're being so extra right now but I styled it out and took as much shit as I could so Jimmy: 👍 Janis: be with you now then Jimmy: okay Janis: that was fun Janis: do you think my nan and granddad will let me stay 'til we can go Jimmy: you can stay here if not Janis: who's gonna 🔪 me in my sleep first, like Jimmy: they'll get me first it's alright Janis: oh so I have to watch you die, lovely Jimmy: already 👻 me remember Janis: fair, he really would keel over if we pretend I need to move in 'cos my fucked up family Janis: no styling that rage out Jimmy: I'm not pretending Jimmy: you can Janis: shit's gonna be hard enough with Cass for you, I ain't gonna do that Janis: but thanks Jimmy: shit's always hard Jimmy: stay with me Janis: we're always together anyway Janis: we'll work it out Jimmy: I'll get a bigger bed if you want Janis: you're so Janis: stop Janis: probably should for the sake of your back Janis: to be fair Jimmy: say you'll stay Janis: okay Janis: I'll stay Jimmy: you promise yeah Janis: I promise Janis: 'less your Da literally calls garda or something Jimmy: alright then Jimmy: 'cause he won't Jimmy: too shit scared I'll let 'em know that he smacks me about Janis: and he needs you to wanna stick about, like it or not Janis: fuck it Janis: you want me to, yeah Jimmy: I ain't only saying it for you Jimmy: I'm that dickhead Janis: I love that dickhead Jimmy: I love you Janis: I love you so fucking much Jimmy: it's gonna be alright, like it'll be shit but I'll make it okay too Janis: me too Janis: I'll get a job and all and we can save and yeah Jimmy: I'll get another job Jimmy: now I ain't on the clock as your fake boyfriend I can have two again Janis: lowkey feels like you're just tryna best me but okay 😏 Janis: #illget3 Jimmy: I have loads of money saved from before & now Jimmy: some of its for the kids but Jimmy: not all of it is Janis: yeah? Janis: we can make this work Janis: I ain't just saying it Jimmy: me either Jimmy: I promise Jimmy: I'll show you when you get here, there is loads but I've not counted it properly for ages Jimmy: be that nerd for me, tah Janis: do my best Janis: should've probably paid more attention in maths but remember that much Jimmy: my northern education don't go beyond counting to 10 so Jimmy: have a better crack than me Jimmy: need my #dreamteam to hand out the change Janis: 😂 Janis: poor boy Janis: not to be fucking depressing about it but Janis: this is the first time I've felt Janis: hopeful Janis: since Janis: yeah Jimmy: I get it Jimmy: you know I do Jimmy: I feel it Jimmy: I'm not gonna let you down, I swear Janis: I know loads of stuff is still fucked but Janis: it's like Janis: not entirely helpless, with you, us Jimmy: loads of stuff is always gonna be fucked but I'll make you happy still Janis: you do Janis: that's all I wanna do for you too Jimmy: you do Jimmy: I don't know how to explain how fucking massive it is that I even wanna do that for you, never mind that you can do it for me Jimmy: without sounding like a dickhead Jimmy: but I'd given up ages ago on that Janis: yeah Janis: I get it Janis: I really didn't like anyone, you know Janis: it's the truth Jimmy: I know Janis: but you just Janis: I dunno why it happened or how Jimmy: It don't matter Jimmy: I'm just glad Jimmy: I didn't like anyone either, I don't Jimmy: I love the kids but I also hate them 'cause of everything they make me do Janis: understandable, think anyone would Janis: in your shoes Jimmy: there's no room for like in that Janis: no time either Jimmy: even when I thought I loved my ex I didn't like her loads of the time Jimmy: couldn't Jimmy: she was just Janis: not enough of a dickhead? Jimmy: too much of one Janis: colour me offended Jimmy: she was just another mess for me Jimmy: you've never been that Janis: but if I move in Janis: won't I be doing that Jimmy: I take care of you, you take care of me Jimmy: it's mutual Jimmy: not like here's my mess carry it for me while we pretend you ain't holding your own too Janis: yeah Janis: okay Janis: that makes sense Jimmy: I can't remember her asking me a question Jimmy: about me I mean Janis: known plenty of people like that Janis: I guess, you wanted that, at first, yeah Janis: easier Jimmy: yeah except nobody else does either Jimmy: just you Jimmy: you asked me why I don't answer 'em there's the answer to that Janis: yeah Janis: well I am a notoriously nosey bitch so Janis: never stop, me Jimmy: I like it Jimmy: you Janis: good Janis: don't fancy sharing a single bed if you don't, tbh Janis: awkward Jimmy: I said I'll get a bigger one, don't need to beg Janis: 😏 Janis: I hear you though, you know Janis: even if I ask questions and then don't know what to say back Janis: I still give a shit about the answer Jimmy: even when my mum was about she never asked me how I was or school or nowt like that Jimmy: at least you try Janis: fucked, really Janis: that's what fills live up, the questions, however boring or throwaway Janis: for normal people, like Jimmy: nobody in my fucked up family wants the answers Jimmy: even Bobby knows not to ask and he's 6 Janis: then it gets so you only talk when something unavoidably fucked has happened Jimmy: or not even then Jimmy: 👍 Janis: yeah Janis: hm Jimmy: just preparing you for what a barrel of laughs it's gonna be for you living at my house Janis: don't worry Janis: not like I won't fit right in Janis: so much you're gonna be booting me out sharpish Jimmy: never Jimmy: if you're going, I'm going Janis: promise Jimmy: I'll swear on owt you want Jimmy: Ian's balding head Jimmy: Cass' growing rage Jimmy: name it Janis: 😂 Janis: I love you, Jimmy Jimmy: 'course you do Jimmy: best boyfriend ever Janis: mhmm Janis: I see no lie Jimmy: as soon as we get a bigger bed we're gonna have a kid & a dog in it & be no better off Jimmy: that's what I'm seeing Janis: you just scared the shit out of me 'til I realized who you meant Janis: well you know Janis: least they still love us Janis: gotta keep 'em on side Jimmy: inviting 'em off the street, in you come lads 👌 Janis: also no, but that is about as batshit an idea, yeah Jimmy: batshit'd be right Jimmy: that's my life, girl Jimmy: welcome & tah for the RSVP Janis: 😏 Janis: least it's different from my own Jimmy: get famous off the comic strip won't I & you'll really love me then Janis: that is what I'm after Janis: fame and money Jimmy: your #thirst for Pete is blatant so I'm aware Janis: firstly I loved him before I knew he was in a band Janis: and he'll never be famous or rich, he's the bassist Janis: how many bassists do you know Jimmy: 1 & that's him Jimmy: but I'm antisocial that don't count Janis: exactly, it's him and Paul friggin McCartney Janis: who I would never bang Jimmy: hang on Jimmy: he was the bassist Janis: right Janis: you didn't even know Janis: proves my point Jimmy: fuck me Jimmy: my world is rocked Jimmy: & not by his bass notes Janis: I know, it's less clout than the drummer Janis: at least at a glance you can tell the difference between a drum and a guitar Jimmy: I'd only fuck George always or Ringo now 👴💕 not that you asked Jimmy: bit rude Janis: I'm sorry but I respect your choices Janis: probably would John 'cos he was a massive dickhead and just my type so Jimmy: I ain't growing my hair for you Jimmy: will stay in bed though Janis: will need that bigger bed Janis: they were not doing that in a single Janis: fuck peace then, eh lads Jimmy: what else do we need in my room though really Jimmy: floordrobe Jimmy: done Janis: exactly Janis: my life is in this bag Janis: was gonna find a squat for you, not that picky Jimmy: just train the dog not to piss on it all & we're 👌 Janis: genuine q Janis: what are we doing for a door tonight Janis: as yours is fucked Jimmy: shit Jimmy: maybe we can bodge it some way Janis: yeah, sure we can Janis: i'm a pro Janis: my brother is always breaking things, doors included Jimmy: but like if we're got the kid & the dog in, Ian's downstairs & Cass is probably pretending I drowned at the beach so Jimmy: not as much of an issue as it sounds Janis: true true Jimmy: which brother Jimmy: the deaf one Jimmy: or the other one Janis: other one Janis: kind of a savage, don't tell Ian Janis: he'll be buzzing Jimmy: he would love that Jimmy: so secret's safe Janis: so many stereotypes being met Janis: thanks lads Jimmy: he asked Cass if she was a lesbian Jimmy: might also be a homophobe Jimmy: we're doing great here ourselves Janis: 👍 Janis: only one of ours is Janis: some of the others say they're bi but you can ignore that 'cos it's not real Jimmy: 🤞 she is to fuck him off Jimmy: he calls Bobby by girls names all the time 'cause he says he is like a girl for crying & shit Jimmy: give the man another 🏆 Janis: ain't old enough to be claiming that shit as generational Janis: no matter how northern you are Jimmy: our kid has got loads to cry about Jimmy: I say let him Janis: why not Janis: save a fortune on doors Jimmy: think it through Ian Janis: does it help Jimmy: what Janis: crying Janis: do you think Jimmy: it don't do fuck all for me Jimmy: but nowt does other than you Jimmy: still happens sometimes Jimmy: you just Janis: can't help it Jimmy: or you think maybe it'll help just that once even though you know it's bollocks Janis: and what do you have to lose Jimmy: exactly nowt Jimmy: like I'm gonna call Ian's bird mum all night, don't have to remember her name & get to make it weird Janis: oh God Janis: that is funny, even though I should feel sympathy 'cos you did that to me Jimmy: if you wanna sit next to her & commiserate about the Taylor's, go on Jimmy: not stopping you Janis: gonna find out how well suited she is to Ian first Janis: but tah Janis: love some #sisterhoodsolidarity me Jimmy: as long as you still sit next to me Jimmy: do what you want Janis: obviously Jimmy: I'm not doing your sister's double dating seating plan bollocks Janis: 🙄 Janis: don't Jimmy: if I can't touch you under the table I'm not staying sat down Jimmy: hill I'm dying on tonight Janis: damn Janis: noble cause Jimmy: there's only so many 🚬 breaks we can take even if they do annoy the birthday boy Janis: don't he smoke? Jimmy: he's a hypocrite of course Janis: he could quit any time yeah Janis: ugh Jimmy: he might do for her 🤞 the damage is already done Jimmy: if I get cancer & he don't, fuming Janis: my God won't let that happen Jimmy: your god that don't exist yeah Janis: that's the one Jimmy: 👌 Janis: he don't wanna upset me Janis: trust Jimmy: that's just good sense Jimmy: your bad side is like Jimmy: I ain't even finishing the sentence is how it is Janis: wise Janis: 😒 Jimmy: come here I need you Janis: I'm near Janis: couple more stops I think Jimmy: but be nearer Janis: I'll take over the bus, hold on Jimmy: good Jimmy: it's about time Janis: what am I like Janis: not appreciating you at all rn Jimmy: anyone would think you were still faking it Jimmy: no effort Janis: no one ever thought I was faking it Janis: 'cept you Jimmy: I didn't Jimmy: I've told you loads of times you weren't that good, babe Janis: 😑 oh please Janis: you thought I hated you Jimmy: please what, pretend that you didn't want me so badly & it was so obvious Janis: UGH Janis: turning this bus 'round Janis: gonna do the normal route, like Jimmy: you won't Jimmy: nowt's changed you still want me so badly & it's still so obvious Janis: shut up Janis: least I weren't that obvious Janis: could've got in real trouble, perv Jimmy: you weren't that obvious to who, baby? Janis: I hate you 😣 Jimmy: so much, I know Janis: hmpf Janis: like you were so 😎 dickhead Jimmy: always am Janis: 👌 Jimmy: go on, when weren't I Janis: when have you ever been? 🤔 Janis: real question Jimmy: 💔💔💔 Janis: you were mean first Jimmy: still waiting for you to give me an actual example of me ever not being 😎 as fuck Janis: I don't know why you wanna be mortified Janis: by your shameless past thirst Jimmy: I know why you can't think of one & you're playing for time Janis: might not have been that long but you've packed in loads of 🤓 Jimmy: sounds like an excuse that Jimmy: no shame in not being able to come up with one Janis: 🙄 Janis: what about every time I've beat you at everything Janis: for starters Jimmy: letting you win is #goals & therefore 😎 Janis: you ain't once Janis: liar liar Jimmy: that's what you think 'cause I'm good at faking it, unlike you, babe Janis: firstly you were awful at it Janis: why do you think it went by the wayside so fast Janis: secondly how do you know I'm not still faking it #longcon Jimmy: I told you, 'cause you wanted me so bad & it was so obvious Jimmy: which is the same reason I know you ain't faking nowt now Janis: the Lord is testing me Janis: thought this dinner was meant to be the hard part Jimmy: I said you were hot from the off, that's how 😎 I am, alright Janis: peppered in with many, many insults Janis: sure Jimmy: I meant them as well like Jimmy: 💕 Janis: 💋🍑 Jimmy: 😂 Janis: such a pisstake Jimmy: you love it Janis: hmm Jimmy: & me Janis: yeah Janis: more fool me Jimmy: it's a top move, smart girl Janis: you sound like a teacher Janis: not a mood Jimmy: but I don't have coffee breath & I'm here to meet you off the bus so Janis: it's a start 😏 Jimmy: you'll know when I start Janis: I hate it when you're right Janis: even a little Jimmy: no you don't Janis: 😩 Jimmy: me knowing what I'm doing is as good for you as it is for me Jimmy: I'll show you Janis: fuck Janis: [off the bus like hey] Jimmy: [picks her up to get her away from the other people getting off like excuse us] Janis: ['they might think this is a grabbing, you know'] Jimmy: ['I'll take my chances either way' sits down on the bus shelter seat with her in his lap like always so a make out can ensue] Janis: [telling him how much she's missed him in between breaths 'cos always true and saying how bad she wants him 'cos true now] Jimmy: [he can't look at her because he's been crying on & off throughout this day & convo cos he's soft & it's been a one but hiding that as best he can with extra kisses & touches & words spoken into her neck or shoulder or wherever] Janis: [all the comforting touches and holding him so tight with all the ilys ever] Jimmy: [saying it back & trying to pull her closer to him than he's probably ever, soz about it] Janis: [touching his face and looking right at him like 'you're so perfect for me'] Jimmy: [says 'you' but the softest & quietest] Janis: ['you, baby' hugging him like it's been a lifetime 'cos today lowkey has] Jimmy: [the tightest & longest hug they both need with soft kisses that get less because like you said, what a day & desperation is allowed] Janis: ['please tell me we've got time to be alone one last time, like'] Jimmy: [nods because he'd make time if they didn't] Janis: [soft but needy moan into his mouth 'cos you know, thank God] Jimmy: [literally does whatever he can to make her do that again because] Janis: [saying his name over and over under her breath] Jimmy: [says 'fuck' but we know its a moan really who are we kidding boy] Janis: ['please'] Jimmy: [shamelessly going as hard as he can here & now 'cause he don't wanna move yet & lbr they've done more public places at this point] Janis: [soz world but they need to so, not even soz for how much noise she's barely toning down here] Jimmy: [likewise him cos when is he ever chill about anything] Janis: ['this is- you're everything'] Jimmy: [gives her so many 'you' s & her name like shh but don't] Janis: [when this just encourages you to go harder but at least you're bitey so you aren't as loud] Jimmy: [and what you give you get back so we're all having a good time] Janis: ['make me cum, I couldn't without you earlier, I was so...'] Jimmy: [can always go harder & will because what more encouragement could he need honestly] Janis: ['scuse her, now all the neighbours probs know his name] Jimmy: [excuse him because intense eye contact forever & he's not being any more subtle so] Janis: ['you're actually killing me'] Jimmy: ['I know you can take it'] Janis: [unholy noises] Jimmy: [being even more extra like see, I told you you could handle this & also this] Janis: ['Baby'] Jimmy: ['it's alright' the most intense kissing ever because why not thanks bye] Janis: [the most needy kiss she'd have ever lbr and clinging onto his neck] Jimmy: [the most important of ILYs after] Janis: ['I love you the most anyone has loved anyone ever'] Jimmy: [has to just kiss her & hold onto her because the emotions bitch] Janis: ['I lost count though'] Jimmy: ['I don't mind'] Janis: ['doesn't bode well for my accountancy career but it was mostly your fault so'] Jimmy: [little lol] Janis: [smiling 'no one has ever felt this good, just me'] Jimmy: ['what about me?'] Janis: ['I hope it feels even half as good for you too'] Jimmy: [is just smiles & heart eyes cos obvs & god bless these two] Janis: [snuggles for a time 'come on then, let's go fuck shit up'] Jimmy: [tries to snuggle in more/shamelessly hide cos doesn't want to] Janis: ['I know, baby but it'll be alright, promise.'] Jimmy: [starts kissing her anywhere & everywhere so she won't wanna go either cos cheeky like that. 'it's alright here'] Janis: ['It's more than alright' the but don't need to be said 'cos duh 'when do we have to go?'] Jimmy: [keeps being very distracting but gives her a vague answer like 'we're got ages'] Janis: [is dubious but ain't that bothered obvs 'fashionably late is fine but can see your house from here so'] Jimmy: [carries on because trying to make a round 2 happen here as if they don't have somewhere to be. 'All I'm bothered about is if they can hear us from here.'] Janis: [has to kiss him 'cos the noise is too real] Jimmy: [so many kisses because he's such a clingy bitch we know & it's only slightly less needy than before obvs] Janis: ['I love you'] Jimmy: [says it back of course & how much he does] Janis: ['why the fuck do I wanna cry though?' is loling but hiding too] Jimmy: 'Baby'[makes her look at him because hands in her hair but gently though. 'Today's been...' he don't need to finish that sentence cos we know. 'it's alright'] Janis: [pulls his hands to her lips and kisses them, before moving them down 'cos wants to forget that moment ever happened and fast] Jimmy: [that's fine by him cos he's done enough crying for everyone today thanks] Janis: [enough talking yo] Jimmy: [enjoy lads cos its downhill from here cos actually do have somewhere to be in a bit] Janis: ['I need to get changed' whilst making no effort to move] Jimmy: [him too obviously but shrugs and just keeps snuggling until his phone rings. He don't answer it but we know who it is & why] Janis: [leaves it 'til the second ring before getting up, pulling him up with her] Jimmy: [handholding on the short walk back to his & as soon as he gets there it's time to sit on the doorstep & 🚬 cos we're gonna make Ian late & annoyed kids] Janis: [goes in and gets changed, awkward, least Twix and Bobby will be vaguely happy to see her] Jimmy: [eventually comes in & gets Bobby sorted out with whatever his hilarious outfit is gonna be, taking his time & even playing with Twix cos that's the mood] Janis: [comes down in some bomb Ian angering lewk and joins in] Jimmy: [is obviously distracted by how fucking good she looks excuse him] Jimmy: 👍 Janis: [😏] Janis: 👍 Jimmy: [is a mixture of 😍 & 😳] Jimmy: you look Janis: idk what's pissing him off more, your reaction or the actual 'fit Jimmy: either way 🥇 Jimmy: any chance you packed a dress for me, that'd really wind him up Jimmy: or skirt, not fussy me Janis: 😂 Janis: you'd look hot Janis: he's just jealous Jimmy: he'd 🔪🔪 for these legs, babe Jimmy: so did you or am I gonna have to find the most 'fuck you dad!' outfit from my own wardrobe Janis: have a look what takes your fancy, babe Jimmy: 👌 Jimmy: you coming or staying with 💕🐶 Janis: coming, obvs Janis: 🐶 probs gonna come too though Jimmy: [picks Twix up and carries her like a baby because we're annoying Ian not cos he loves her or anything shhh] Jimmy: let's go then Janis: [takes picture 'cos ha got you and 😍] Jimmy: [puts that little pup on his bed & flops down too cos don't wanna do this but she's loving him cos good egg] Janis: [comes and lies down with 'em, just stroking his hair but Twix gets jealous so also loving upon her, 'course] Janis: [oh idea, it should be the club outfit for the throwback feels 'cos not just about killing you, Ian] Jimmy: [little group snuggle pause cos they need it] Jimmy: alright fuck this Jimmy: [still hasn't moved even though] Janis: come on Janis: make yourself look fit or ridiculous Janis: that's the choices Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: [finally does start getting ready because have to at some point] Janis: [just perving and chilling, gets a messages but ignores it] Jimmy: [comes back to the bed as soon as because she really does look GOOD and it's distracting so make out session much to Twix's annoyance soz pup] Janis: ['good choice, babe'] Jimmy: [before he can answer the front door slams which means Cass is also back which is gonna be fun for all the fam] Janis: [squeezes his hand comfortingly] Janis: here we go Jimmy: [everyone can hear her kicking off at Ian downstairs so obviously he has to get up & go sort that leaving her with Twix and Bobby who has also come in cos not about this drama] Jimmy: one sec Janis: 🍀 Janis: [just having a chat with Bobs about the fam 'cos he loves and it's not painful at all lol] Jimmy: [just can hear everyone shouting for a bit which is delightful & then Cass comes upstairs & slams her bedroom door & he comes back up not long after] Jimmy: [gets busy immediately making sure Bob is alright cos what else can he do or say like] Janis: [is realistically even less use and defs gonna keep quiet 'cos no comment needed rn] Janis: need a sec? I can go 🚬 Jimmy: he's alright Jimmy: that's round one Jimmy: loads more to go Jimmy: [tells him to go get Twix a treat though to keep them both busy] Janis: 👍 Janis: his blood pressures already through the roof looks of, no one's lasting 'til dessert, like Jimmy: oh didn't I tell you the plan was 🔪💀 Janis: didn't Janis: and bit rude to spring murder spree on a girl but 👌 Janis: I'm down Jimmy: one bloke ain't a spree, my love Jimmy: but alright we'll hit your house next & make it one Jimmy: since you're down Janis: so pedantic always, my dear Janis: but such a romantic with it 😍 Jimmy: we'll be getting the summons to head off soon Jimmy: let's go 🚬 Janis: aye aye Jimmy: [carries her down the stairs cos if it winds up Twix it annoys Ian & off they go outside] Janis: [is 😏 'til they outside] Janis: ['you're gonna do your back in, you know'] Jimmy: ['you ain't that heavy, calm down' & he proves it by sitting her back on his lap cos fave & they both need the closeness to get through this shitshow] Janis: [rests her head on his chest so she can hear his heartbeat, 'why are parents the worst people in the world?'] Jimmy: ['might just be ours' & shrugs then lights a 🚬 but not his own yet cos obvious a bit in his thoughts like] Janis: [shakes head but just smokes in silence for a bit, 'Mia should have a kid, or make one of her underlings who is still physically able, like'] Jimmy: ['you're gonna wanna take that back 'cause you know she'd ask your sister & make you be auntie to it'] Janis: *[makes puking motion, 'not being an auntie to the actual ones that exist, never mind satan's spawn'] Jimmy: [does 👍 IRL] Janis: ['is Cass' mate coming or?'] Jimmy: [shakes his head. 'Dad of the year said no'] Janis: [tuts like 'course, 'shoulda just showed up, kid'] Jimmy: ['if you want your thunder stolen, girl, yeah'] Janis: ['obviously not, massive attention seeker, me' gestures at the outfit 'cos ur welcome, Ian and Mrs Ian 'but you know, might get her in a slightly better mood, 'cos that I can't do right now'] Jimmy: [can't help staring cos she's drawn attention to how fucking hot she is again so don't mind him he's shamelessly 🤤 like has he even heard the 2nd bit of what she said lol] Janis: [pushes him, but gently 'cos don't also wanna fall here 'don't disagree then, dickhead! actually fishing there, for once'] Jimmy: [is looking at her like ?? cos was too distracted to even, soz bout it] Janis: ['least do something about it if you're gonna look at me like that, boy'] Jimmy: [a kiss like he wanted to give her when she first wore this outfit but obviously couldn't so] Janis: [is now the one shamelessly 🤤 don't get too comfortable lads, does the blowback thing to him this time for them mems too] Jimmy: [so much intense eye contact when he's not also staring at her lips or her body like somebody stop him you can't hook up again here & now lads there isn't time or opportunity but damn] Janis: [makes frustrated noise and pushes him again, still gentle, but mad about it] Jimmy: [kisses her again to try & get some of the frustration out cos same girl but not really gonna help is it boy] Janis: ['this is gonna be the longest night ever, isn't it'] Jimmy: [nods because all he can do in his frustrated state & also all he has chance to go cos finally time to go so there's that interruption I imagine Ian's girlfriend awkwardly appearing like 'ahem'] Jimmy: [okay so the idea is JJ go with her cos they'd need two cars to fit everyone & that way they can be basically alone cos ignoring the gf when Ian ain't there plus if Jimmy was in a car with his dad they'd get killed/end up in a car wreck + this way it's more 'fun' for Ian cos Bobby would be whinging since he's JJ's biggest fan & Cass would be annoyed that he's being annoying on top of the mood she's already in. Enjoy fella} Jimmy: [oh & I nearly forgot he sends her a fire sext as they are getting in cos the combination of sexual frustration + that outfit is such a throwback so it's like everything he would've done then & everything he's gonna do cos she's his now so basically the hottest one to date not soz] Janis: [just dying in this lady's car like] Janis: really Janis: first you spring a spree on me Janis: now you straight up kill me Janis: and just Jimmy: [just know he is sitting in the middle so he's closer to her to be that dickhead & also doesn't have his seatbelt on which is blatantly gonna make this poor woman be like 'ahem' again when her car alerts her at some point but for now, gotta use the extra movement available to kiss her neck & collarbones cos they are so #exposed in that top & if you wanna talk about dying babe like & also touching her boobs cos they're also out I remember, excuse me lady] Jimmy: not yet Jimmy: but it can be a 💀💕 note yeah, 'cause it is my masterpiece Jimmy: if you want Janis: you are so Janis: 😣 Jimmy: go on, compliment me Jimmy: what do you wanna say Janis: you're the biggest dickhead I've ever met Jimmy: cute 💕 Jimmy: so romantic you Janis: don't call me cute 😡 Jimmy: or what you're gonna fight me Jimmy: have a go, she ain't my mum but she might turn this car around Janis: yeah I wish Janis: not that 🍀 Jimmy: yeah you are Jimmy: [points at himself like you got me cos such a nerd] Janis: how are you the same person Janis: does someone ghostwrite your sexts for you Janis: and can I meet 'em Jimmy: 💔💔💔 Jimmy: [puts his seatbelt on cos 1. the poor woman be like can you just & 2. offended at the bae being rude] Janis: hey Jimmy: ? Jimmy: [is doing a pouty face exaggerated] Janis: baby Janis: [cups his chins] Jimmy: [kisses her cos can't even pretend he don't wanna] Janis: [how painful it'd be to not go hard rn, 'scuse you lady] Jimmy: [he would anyway cos lowkey forget she exists soz woman] Janis: [having to be like no no for your own sake 'fore it gets too real] Jimmy: [at least it isn't a long car ride] Janis: you're mean you are Jimmy: I'm nice me Jimmy: what are you on about Janis: nope Janis: starting things you can't finish Janis: rude Jimmy: we can finish Jimmy: just be quiet Jimmy: easy, yeah Janis: 😑 Jimmy: you're really gonna turn down such a simple challenge right now Jimmy: 👌 girl Janis: I didn't say no, did I Jimmy: still waiting for the yeah though, aren't I Janis: now he's being considerate Jimmy: you trying to outmean me when I ain't even being Jimmy: top one, babe Jimmy: 🏆🏆🏆 Janis: I am not Janis: you'd know if I was being mean, babe Jimmy: just come here Janis: [when are you not on his lap] Jimmy: [eyes on the road lady you don't need to see none of this] Janis: I missed you Jimmy: I missed you more Janis: [shakes head] Jimmy: [nods] Jimmy: Can't you feel how much Janis: [makes little noise despite trying really hard not to] Janis: Baby, please Jimmy: [kisses her so he don't make any noise himself except into her mouth cos he's not as good at this we know] Janis: you meant it, yeah Janis: when you said you'd touch me under the table Jimmy: I don't say shit I don't mean Jimmy: not even to piss him off Janis: good Janis: 'cos I want you, not just to piss him off Jimmy: [more kissing & touching cos he wants her too literally always & Ian ain't even here rn] Jimmy: I love you, not just 'cause it pisses him off Janis: I know Janis: not that good an actor, babe Jimmy: [is being saucy as hell] Jimmy: let's see how good of an actor you are Janis: fucking Janis: fuck Janis: challenge accepted Janis: I've got this Jimmy: [is 😏] Janis: [kisses his smirky mouth 'cos] Jimmy: [bites her lip cos needs to bite his own rn really but less fun] Janis: [know for a fact wheever they're going ain't gonna be that far away and you're gonna be even more frustrated] Jimmy: [literally not gonna take a 6 year old on a long drive to a restaurant when they are everywhere are you so think on lads] Janis: [is so grumpy when they gotta get out lmao] Jimmy: [likewise & then literally all I can imagine is them trying to go to the bathroom together when they get there but then Bobby's like I wanna go too so cockblocked] Janis: [from the ladies oh kids] Janis: your brother is cute and everything Janis: but I ain't sharing my dessert with him now Jimmy: he can have mine already lost my appetite when I caught this bird making 😍 at Ian Janis: such a catch Janis: but control yourself, please Janis: have some decorum Jimmy: I give it 10 before Cass bounces a bread roll off both their heads though so Janis: nothing like kids to kill the mood Janis: 👌 Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: outside it is then he can't follow us to smoke til he's at least Cass' age Janis: your dads gutted his lady is too #classy for that Jimmy: I'll invite him just to watch him have to say no Janis: 💔 Jimmy: I know you are but I'll make it up to you Janis: how, got something stronger on you? 😏 Jimmy: come with me & find out girl Janis: [duh, how rude honestly lads but yolo] Jimmy: [when Ian is fuming and they ain't even looked at the menu yet lol] Janis: [alone at last for however long you can realistically 'fore Ian drags you back in] Jimmy: [at least they don't long with how turned on they both are, you're welcome Ian] Janis: [coming back to the table like it ain't dead obvious ok] Jimmy: [when your dad makes you go up the bar with him to get the drinks so he can have a go at you without his missus hearing lovely] Janis: [the most awkward table ever] Janis: tell him his inside voice could do with some work Janis: heard that bit then Jimmy: I'll give him a smack in a sec that'll shut him up Janis: bars pretty crowded, could say he got elbowed in the face or summin' Jimmy: tah babe Janis: jus' sayin' Janis: back you up Janis: or I could come elbow him in the face Jimmy: 😍😍😍 Jimmy: go on then Janis: I have changed my mind anyway Janis: defs making it a triple Jimmy: you can also cover me while I pour extra sugar into my brother's juice Janis: 👍 Janis: already blowing her mind over here Jimmy: 'cause he's chatting & she's never heard him before or 'cause he ain't & she thought they were over that bit 💔💔 Janis: first onw Janis: he's missed you Jimmy: & you Jimmy: 💕 Janis: well reckon he can count as my favourite person in this shithole, when you ain't about so Jimmy: mine too Jimmy: unless Barry moves over, of course Janis: well I'll console poor Bobby in that eventuality then Jimmy: & Pete is pretty high on my list of faves, soz our kid Janis: 🙄 I know but if you mention her my elbows are gonna get confused Jimmy: who? Janis: I don't know her name but I can be descriptive if you really want Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: you should've caught it so you could stalk her socials Jimmy: some 🔥 pics of me in my uniform Janis: ignoring you now Janis: goodbye Janis: we're having a great time over here Jimmy: yeah? Jimmy: 👌 Janis: yep Janis: so much fun Jimmy: you ain't got better at faking nowt have you, my love Janis: like I'm here to be being nice and sociable Janis: would have invited your other girlfriend for that Jimmy: yeah I would Jimmy: [comes back with the drinks] Janis: [down it] Jimmy: are you telling me to piss off again or just having that much fun Janis: 🤷 Janis: could be both Jimmy: [downs his drink too] Jimmy: come back up the bar with me then Janis: [does] Jimmy: what do you want, lightweight? Jimmy: don't have to be same again Janis: 'cos mixing is sensible 😏 Janis: whatever though Jimmy: tonight it is Jimmy: & why you're here, like Jimmy: my other girlfriend can hold her drink better Jimmy: no fun for the family in that Janis: look Janis: here to fight Ian, not you Jimmy: then don't Jimmy: [pulls her in for a really good kiss moment] Janis: stop being a dickhead then Jimmy: teamwork Jimmy: I promise Janis: mhmm Jimmy: [kisses her again to prove that he means it] Janis: come on then Jimmy: we could just leg it Jimmy: should Janis: you mean you don't want me to get shitfaced now Janis: make up your mind Jimmy: if you could let me know what kinda drunk you're gonna be Jimmy: I will Jimmy: 🤞 for fun & nice to me Janis: already established that's your other girlfriend, haven't we Jimmy: could be both Janis: why would it be Jimmy: why wouldn't it Jimmy: I'm so nice & fun Janis: [rolls her eyes and starts heading back to the table] Jimmy: [pulls her back cos he is that dramatic. 'Do you want me to get down on my knees in this restaurant too. A fake proposal is just what this family dinner needs & Ian ain't showing no signs of stepping up with his'] Janis: ['do you want me to actually slap you or' pulling him forward like come on] Jimmy: ['been there before & you wouldn't, remember'] Janis: ['well I'm full of surprises'] Jimmy: ['prove it'] Janis: ['I'm no more gonna slap you in the middle of this restaurant than you're gonna fake propose so shut up'] Jimmy: ['then you better say yes 'cause that sounds like a challenge to me, babe & I've never not accepted'] Janis: ['do not'] Jimmy: [is 😏 'you're right I'll do it at the table, more of an impact. Tah babe. You always have top ideas.'] Janis: ['cos you really want your entire fam to witness that L, alright' shaking her head like gimme strength as they go back] Jimmy: [shrugs 'gotta tell them you're moving in anyway, can carry you over the threshold this way, can't I. The romantic in you'll love that.'] Janis: ['how you reckon you're getting a yes and a slap, idiot?'] Jimmy: [I know you so well, Juliet'] Janis: ['you wish'] Jimmy: [shakes his head cos he does know her & we know it & gets comfy in his seat] Janis: [dranking] Jimmy: [likewise but also trying to find something Bobby will eat cos this ain't the cali gaff & he's being deliberately fussy cos don't wanna be here & we know Cass is too but can't pick for her] Janis: shoulda gone for something themed Janis: less choice Jimmy: you wanna see me in the outfit or you wanna wear the outfit Jimmy: either way 👍 Jimmy: missed a trick Ian Janis: what you chatting Jimmy: if there's a theme, no half measures Janis: I meant like Janis: nandos, or a burger place 😂 Jimmy: spoilsport Janis: that's me, babe Jimmy: [nudges her playfully] Janis: why are the kids menus always so much better Jimmy: order off it Jimmy: he ain't your dad he can't stop you Janis: 😂 Janis: tah Jimmy: so welcome Janis: better remind her not to get the salad Janis: yeah you look #skinny but you'll end up with spinach in your teeth Jimmy: there's all that #femalesolidarity you always say you don't give a shit about Jimmy: get her to order something heavy on the garlic 💔 gutted Dad Janis: she defs didn't ask for this Jimmy: 🎻🎻🎻 Jimmy: makes all of us that Janis: 🤷 obvs not Jimmy: [back to the bar for more drinks excuse him] Janis: not getting an invite this time, alright Jimmy: so you need one every time, alright Janis: brb Janis: [🚬] Jimmy: no invite for no invite then, yeah Janis: reckon we both need a sec, yeah Jimmy: 👌 Janis: come have one if you want Janis: know this ain't about me and it's more shit for you and whatever but I can still need some space, can't I Jimmy: I said alright, didn't I Jimmy: two's a crowd, I get it Janis: whatever Janis: I knew this was a bad idea Jimmy: nobody said it was a good one Janis: 👌 Jimmy: if you wanna go, just go Jimmy: you don't need to be here Janis: you want me to Jimmy: is that a question Jimmy: I said if you want Janis: it's a question Jimmy: I want you to stay but Jimmy: if I don't want to then Janis: then I will Janis: not like anyone wants to be here Janis: but you asked Jimmy: leaving would piss him off more than owt we've done yet Jimmy: maybe we should just Janis: do you wanna, like obviously but Janis: is it worth it or do you wanna stick it out and just ruin the night some more Jimmy: I don't know Jimmy: we could try letting Cass in on it, might make her hate us less Janis: worth a shot Janis: even if she's still mad with us, also permanently with him so Janis: text her Jimmy: one sec Jimmy: alright she's in & coming outside with me so hang on Janis: 👍 Janis: no one can resist being a dick to their 'rents Jimmy: or the lure of 🚬 take that 🚭 Jimmy: not that I'm gonna really let her but Jimmy: [comes out & has brought her drink with him cos good boy like that] Janis: so uncool, babe Jimmy: piss off Janis: [winks 'cos cheeky and takes drink and kisses his cheek] Jimmy: [Cass comes out just as he's kissing her properly cos typical so she's like 😒🤢] Janis: [makes a whoops soz face like] Jimmy: [is 🚬 & Cass is brainstorming out loud about pissing Ian off, first one being kicking Bobby under the table so he cries & Jimmy has be like probably don't lol] Janis: [lols 'cos 100% something she'd have done to grace] Jimmy: [Jimmy's like also encourage him to fuck shit up though like drawing on the table, kicking off, not staying put etc typical kid things that will annoy Ian] Janis: [She's like 'you should facetime your mate in the middle of food, like' to Cass] Jimmy: [actually gets a smile out of her before she remembers she hates them cos great idea] Janis: result Janis: [victory sip] Jimmy: [cheers' her drink with a nod that they should probably head back in, in a sec. Cass goes & does kick bobby 'accidentally' as she gets in her sit cos cool kid who don't have to listen to you Jimothy] Janis: [Ian shoulda ordered for them 'cos they 'weren't here' such a dickhead move] Jimmy: [Jimmy sets Bobby up doing art but he's still whinging cos nobody's trying to stop him rn except Ian who can't] Janis: just like you Jimmy: nah better Jimmy: I've told him to draw the gf so 🤞 it's unflattering or that'll backfire Janis: kids drawings always are Janis: they don't sugarcoat it Jimmy: the one he did of my dad was 🥇 Janis: mhmm Janis: tell him I'll pay him to do you later yeah Jimmy: tell him yourself he loves a chat with you Janis: dunno why Jimmy: SUCH a conversationalist Jimmy: [meanwhile Cass is name dropping their mum & talking about her to make Ian & the gf uncomfortable cos that would work amazingly but poor Jimmy is likewise feeling tense af] Jimmy: I'll be back in a sec Jimmy: [leaves the table again it's like musical chairs bitch] Janis: 👍 Janis: sure thing Jimmy: [is not back in a sec] Janis: lost, or purposefully 'lost' Janis: the starter sharing thing is here Jimmy: Ian would be devastated to have to eat my share, I'm sure Janis: there's only so much defensive eating me and Cass can do 'fore we chunder Janis: you alright? Jimmy: I just Jimmy: she did that to get at me too, you know Janis: probably Janis: she isn't doing it now, you can come back Janis: or I am can come to you, for a bit Jimmy: [comes back] Janis: [squeezing his hand under the table] Jimmy: [gets an eyelash for her but we both know it's just an excuse he's just soft] Janis: [real smile, real moment, sod everyone else] Jimmy: [smiles back & it's genuine too even though he's obvs still a sad boy] Janis: just tell me what you need, yeah Janis: anything Jimmy: you Jimmy: that's it Janis: seems bit too easy Janis: but alright then Janis: if you're sure Jimmy: don't be calling yourself too easy babe Jimmy: that's a bit rude Janis: 😏 Janis: bit true Jimmy: it's actually well untrue before me Janis: oh really Janis: #yourinfluence Jimmy: exactly Janis: 🙄 don't be cocky Jimmy: it's what you like about me though Jimmy: are you sure Janis: only sometimes Janis: and not about devirginizing me, tah Jimmy: it weren't my fault I did that Janis: not really about fault is it, div Jimmy: just saying you could've worn a badge or whatever Jimmy: sign round your neck that kinda thing Janis: [kicks him in the shin] Janis: you're such a dick Jimmy: oi 💔💔 Janis: don't oi me Janis: your fault Jimmy: I didn't do owt except point out you didn't look like a massive virgin Jimmy: which is a compliment Janis: you and compliments Janis: someone needs to re-explain to concept Jimmy: go on then Janis: okay, hold on Janis: [takes a large swig of her drink for effect] Jimmy: [shakes his head for effect] Janis: so, a compliment, is when you say something nice about a person Janis: not when you say something rude af and then add in some half-baked 'but I meant-' after the fact Janis: got it? Jimmy: say it slower & in a northern accent Janis: 😏 Janis: just stop trying with them, yeah Janis: that's a compromise I'm fine with Jimmy: 👌 Janis: then you can't get moody at me about it either Janis: win win Jimmy: or you could just accept 'em like I want Jimmy: that'd be a win win Janis: oh sure Janis: I'm so hard up I need 'didn't look like a massive virgin' Janis: 👌 Jimmy: alright it weren't my best one Janis: 😂 Janis: like I said, dickhead Janis: and clearly I didn't or you would've clocked it Jimmy: It weren't like I was looking for badges or neck signs Jimmy: unless one said like 🐇🍳 or 🔪💀 not gonna put me off Janis: oh tah Janis: 'cos it was such a big undertaking for you Janis: so much hassle Jimmy: shut up Janis: you said it, boy Jimmy: what are you on about Jimmy: no I never Janis: yeah you did Janis: why would it put you off Janis: not a disease Jimmy: it wouldn't Jimmy: which is what I said Janis: hmm Janis: easy to say now Jimmy: easy to say then too Jimmy: you know how bad I wanted you Janis: I weren't frigid alright Janis: it was just timing, that's all Jimmy: that dickhead made it clear, tah Janis: yeah Janis: well Janis: don't think I was waiting for someone special or anything weird Jimmy: I don't Janis: 👍 Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: [let's all take a moment to appreciate the food Ian has ordered as it arrives] Janis: oh yum Janis: swap with me Jimmy: [does but is 😒 and all wtf is this out loud at Ian & then swaps with Cass like musical plates] Janis: Imma get one of those stupid big sundaes for dessert Jimmy: be quick about ordering it before my dad has a go for you first though Janis: I don't think he'd be ordering me one full stop Janis: why'd he get you all meaty shit and me a salad Janis: is he calling me fat 'cos that's just inaccurate, buy me a burger to fatten me up if anything Jimmy: sexism Jimmy: or being a tight bastard Jimmy: maybe both Jimmy: he could've got you nowt like you don't exist I suppose Janis: 😂 Janis: would've been funnier Janis: and then I coulda got something decent Jimmy: [just voicing all these complaints and more to Ian to annoy him while Cass 'eats' the salad by dramatically gagging etc & then nicking Bobby's plate which is a big drama] Janis: [takes the salad back to be mature about this, casually sharing meals here] Jimmy: [takes it off her & gives her his for good because love bitch] Janis: 💕 Jimmy: [Cass doing her facetiming before Ian has a chance to calm down lols] Jimmy: now that's 💕😍 Janis: deffo Janis: kinda feel usurped Janis: but it's cute Jimmy: you're cute Jimmy: [kisses her, not sorry Ian or his missus] Janis: actually so competitive Janis: I like it Jimmy: I know you do 💪🏆 Jimmy: 🥇 or nowt remember Janis: 'course Janis: how could I forget Jimmy: I ain't letting you Jimmy: [kisses her again even better] Janis: promise I didn't need it but Janis: never gonna turn down a reminder Jimmy: [draws the 👌👍's on her leg with his finger cos that's always a mood] Janis: [holds his hands there for a while 'cos wanna] Jimmy: [writes ILY there too but like over and over cos extra] Janis: [kisses him 'soz everyone but not] Jimmy: [he's lowkey dying cos always does when she kisses him first but still not soz everyone] Janis: [Cass be gagging again] Jimmy: [throws salad at her cos v mature & lbr he don't wanna eat it] Janis: [feeds him some of hers like a romcom to really make everyone vom] Jimmy: so #goals Jimmy: you're gonna make my fake mum 😭 Jimmy: 💔💔 Janis: having the evening she wanted for her Janis: #livevicariously Jimmy: #realitycheckbeforeitstimetowriteoutarealone Jimmy: [Bobby going so hard with the fake voming that he nearly chokes for real god bless] Janis: gonna actually 💀 with our love Jimmy: you just can't stop being 💕 Janis: does that mean you can Janis: 🤔 Jimmy: does that mean you want me to or you don't Janis: why would I want you to stop Jimmy: don't love a rom com you Janis: like I said, you ain't got it down so Janis: not too offensive Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: [Ian dad of the year that he is decides to take Cass' phone cos still facetiming so that's all kicking off & is lovely] Jimmy: let's not go back with them, alright Janis: yeah Janis: alright Janis: we can go anywhere you want Jimmy: I don't care, I just Jimmy: want it to be us for a bit Janis: easy Janis: you're definitely owed at least a few hours of not thinking about Janis: any of this Jimmy: or anything Janis: exactly Janis: can give you that Janis: promise Jimmy: I'll give it you back too Jimmy: promise Janis: I know Janis: you always do Jimmy: [writes 'you' on her leg & a heart cos he's soft] Janis: [draws a heart on his but then a cross through it 'cos not soft her, nah] Janis: if you could live anywhere, like semi-realistically Janis: when you leave Janis: where would you go Jimmy: as long as it ain't back where I came from, I don't mind Jimmy: I ain't been nowhere else before here Jimmy: where do you wanna go? Janis: yeah Janis: I dunno either Janis: don't matter Janis: just not here Jimmy: easy done Jimmy: nowhere too hot though I'm too white & northern for that shit Janis: but you love short shorts 😂 Jimmy: yeah but pink ain't my colour babe Jimmy: nevermind 🦀 red Janis: 😍 will see me through Jimmy: be offering to suncream me up & doing 🎨 on my back Jimmy: 🍆 like Janis: not that predictable, how dare 😉 Jimmy: know what you're about Janis: getting to be really thorough with your sun care, yeah Janis: but I'd be way more creative Jimmy: yeah? Jimmy: what's your masterpiece gonna be then Janis: gonna just write northern twat probably Janis: or call for a good time Janis: possibilities are endless, babe Jimmy: 😂 Janis: probably stick with english speaking countries, you struggle enough as is Jimmy: that's your fault Jimmy: distracting me in every paddy lingo class I've ever been in & dragging me outta half my french ones Janis: okay, that can be my fault Janis: worth it and you know it Jimmy: you are Jimmy: you know it Janis: shut up Janis: got a no compliment rule remember Jimmy: make me Jimmy: it's a fact Janis: dork Janis: if I make you how you wanna he might actually keel over legit Jimmy: you agreed to 💀🔪 already so Jimmy: go on Janis: but I wanted dessert 😋 Jimmy: you still can Jimmy: my new mum will be alive Janis: sticking 'round to bury him and buy the milky bars Janis: what a babe Jimmy: & if she gets mardy 'cause he ain't a handsome corpse well Jimmy: you got me Jimmy: I'll get it Janis: thought you was offering yourself as a sexier corpse Janis: true but unnecessary Jimmy: sexy 👻 lad me Jimmy: ain't offering myself to her though tah Janis: don't Janis: she's no MILF Jimmy: she ain't got no kids unless Ian's offering to change that one way or another Jimmy: but I doubt tonight's the night either way Jimmy: even if he does stay alive Janis: mood #rekt babe Janis: no more brothers or sisters to raise, thank you Jimmy: 🎻🎻 for Ian's lost redemption arc only Janis: gutted Janis: #adoptdontshop Jimmy: now the 🐶's gutted 💔💔 Janis: poor baby Janis: truly Jimmy: 🤞 she's trashing the house & doing her bit Janis: would she do a thing like that Janis: 😇 Jimmy: you trained her so yeah Janis: my evil plan Jimmy: 😈 you Janis: [gives him a saucy look] Janis: don't forget Jimmy: [touches her under the table in a saucy way] Jimmy: don't forget what a perfect match we are Janis: [breathe, bitch] Janis: not gonna let you off that easy Janis: you're stuck Jimmy: nah Jimmy: I'm exactly where I wanna be Jimmy: [keeps touching her to prove his point] Janis: good Janis: I'm Janis: not mad about it either Jimmy: encouraging Jimmy: never off as my #muse you Jimmy: I'm so inspired right now Jimmy: [proves it] Janis: tough job but someone's gotta Janis: if you wanna be 🥇 Jimmy: & you know I do Jimmy: [is 😏 because peak under the table saucy behavior happening rn like] Janis: [casually grabbing his leg 'cos harder to be subtle than she reckoned] Jimmy: [gives her an innocent look like ?? while going harder than before cos he's so cheeky] Janis: you know how much I hate you Janis: yeah Jimmy: so much Jimmy: just don't make it obvious to everyone else Janis: I'm trying Janis: go easy on me Jimmy: if that's what you want, baby Jimmy: [is being a tease now lol] Janis: you're so Janis: 😑 Jimmy: say what you wanna say Janis: when can we leave Jimmy: as fast as you can order & eat the pudding you want Jimmy: that's how soon we can get out of here Janis: Baby Jimmy: ? Janis: I don't want it now Janis: you gonna make me sit here and eat a whole sundae when we could Jimmy: I was gonna make you share it with me actually but Jimmy: we can go Janis: you can have whatever you want, baby Jimmy: I only want you Janis: then let's go Janis: piss him off anyway Janis: height of rudeness Jimmy: I ain't offering to pay owt either Jimmy: he'll be 😭😭 Jimmy: come on Janis: [being blase af like toodles! lmao and essentially running for the door with him] Jimmy: [leg it lads] Janis: [dramatic af smooch outside 'cos love and they're free] Jimmy: where to then Janis: anywhere we can be alone Jimmy: [more kisses just because] Janis: ['I love you'] Jimmy: [says it back obvs] Janis: [says well done etc 'cos knows that was rough] Jimmy: [says tah & we know he really means for being there cos there's the look of love bitch like don't cry again boy] Janis: [shrugs like don't mention it and more kisses but more soft] Jimmy: [then some handholding & walking because gotta go somewhere kids] Janis: ['pub?'] Jimmy: [nods] Janis: [happy dork like 😊] Jimmy: [stops to kiss her again because she's so cute & happy & he can't not] Janis: they should do studies Janis: on how depressed parents make you Janis: I feel 10x better already being away from mine and yours, like Jimmy: [does a little lol but obvs same] Jimmy: when we get our own place, no keys for none of 'em Janis: don't even tell 'em where we are Janis: give 'em no chance to just pop 'round Jimmy: not like we need help with moving 💪 Janis: [also lols] Jimmy: [looks at her as if to say what are you laughing for I'm so strong & picks her up to show off] Janis: [rolls her eyes and is like 'here we go again' but loves it and is loling even more] Jimmy: [make out sesh to 'shut her up' but actually just wants to cos the lols get him] Janis: [look of love bitch] Jimmy: [we need a piggyback moment here so they can get where they need to be, run boy] Janis: [destination Janis: okay 💪 lad Janis: get the first 'round in Jimmy: [does] Jimmy: find us the loneliest corner you can, yeah Janis: 👍 Janis: you forgot who I am again? Jimmy: 'course not Jimmy: the name's Janet, right? Janis: think that was your da's bae, legit Janis: 🙄 thanks, mum and dad Janis: you dicks Jimmy: [lols I hope she can hear it from where she is while he's still at the bar & its not that loud] Janis: 💕 you cute as fuck Janis: I'd try and pull you if I saw you standing there, like Jimmy: go on then Jimmy: have your best crack at it Janis: seriously? Janis: require more chatting up than an actual boyfriend you do Jimmy: challenge refused? Jimmy: alright Janis: challenge? 🤔 Janis: #slag Jimmy: worked in your favor didn't it Jimmy: if we both played as hard to get as you, you'd still be a virgin & I'd be 💔 Janis: bit rude Janis: not my fault your chat is shocking Jimmy: piss off Jimmy: my sexts killed you, ain't my fault you want everything Janis: challenge refused? Janis: 👌 Jimmy: [is 😒 as he brings the drinks to her] Janis: [kisses his cheek and takes drink as per] Jimmy: [pouty boy be drinking] Janis: ['Baby'] Jimmy: [looks at her like ??] Janis: [smiles at] Janis: like that Janis: don't be grumpy Jimmy: [is trying his best to still be in a mard but she's so cute when she smiles that he can't help being 😍 every time] Janis: [its returned so] Jimmy: [kisses] Janis: ['even more like it'] Jimmy: [gestures that she should get even closer to him because standard] Janis: [snuggles into his side, head on his shoulder] Jimmy: [plays with her hair forever cos absolute fave mood] Janis: how can I miss you when I've been with you Janis: other people ruin it somehow, always Jimmy: there's your answer Jimmy: but when they try & ruin it for us we ruin it for them twice as much so Jimmy: 💪🏆 Janis: [little lol] Janis: true enough Jimmy: [more kisses cos of the cuteness of the lol] Janis: maybe next time we go, we could take the kids, win her back 'round Janis: at least temporarily Jimmy: [a genuinely happy big smile because that's a good idea] Janis: [shrugs like nbd] Janis: caravan's always there, like Janis: no one uses it much now Jimmy: [nods to downplay how KEEN he was just then lol] Jimmy: 👍 Janis: depending how much of a shit her little mates 'rents give, he could come Janis: then we only really have to look after Bobs Jimmy: reckon she'd talk 'em round easy even if they are actual parent of the year candidates Jimmy: long as she ain't gone off him by then Janis: subtle hint, babe Janis: keep me on my toes Jimmy: [little lol of his own] Janis: ah to be 12 again Jimmy: you're alright tah Jimmy: didn't know you then Janis: awh Janis: whatta smoothtalker Jimmy: just how it is Jimmy: life was as shit then as it is now basically Jimmy: you're the only diifference Janis: yeah Janis: things were slightly worse Janis: in theory anyway Jimmy: I'm taking that compliment Jimmy: nowt you can do to stop me Janis: fill your boots, lad Janis: know you need all the help you can get 😉 Jimmy: shut up Jimmy: [tickles her like excuse you] Janis: [punchy] Jimmy: [play fight moment] Janis: gonna get us kicked out, boy Janis: know it's rare you make it in, come on Jimmy: piss off Jimmy: that was one club one time Jimmy: if you'd told me you wanted me to dress like Jimmy: that Janis: [loling] Janis: I dunno if that would've worked entirely in your favour either, like Jimmy: it would've worked on you Jimmy: give a fuck about whoever else Janis: is it? Jimmy: deny it Jimmy: you'd have been well 😍😍😍 & 🤤 Janis: [makes 'psh' noise but ain't denying it] Jimmy: [gives her such a hot look] Janis: [rolls her eyes] Janis: it weren't no gay club Janis: that would've kinda defeated the point Jimmy: anywhere's a gay club if you want Jimmy: ask Barry Janis: would've been easier to spin that than random bitches, like Jimmy: they're easy enough to spin too though Janis: shut up Janis: idiot Jimmy: [is 😏] Janis: [is 😒] Jimmy: what's that face for? Janis: yours Jimmy: yeah you are Jimmy: so calm down Janis: piss off Jimmy: [pulls her closer to him as an unspoken no] Janis: mean it Janis: [but doesn't pull away] Jimmy: I mean it Jimmy: you're mine Jimmy: I wanted you then & I want you now Janis: [looking at him intense af] Jimmy: [holds her gaze as intensely of course] Janis: ['you're so'] Jimmy: [says ILY] Janis: [more desperate kissing] Jimmy: [puts her on his lap for more kisses because its been a minute & that's unheard of for them so] Janis: I still like you Janis: even though you are a bit of a dickhead Jimmy: you're the dickhead Jimmy: but I still like you too Janis: nah, don't lie Janis: you more than like me Jimmy: maybe Janis: definitely Jimmy: & you tell me not to be cocky Janis: come on Janis: you said it Janis: you want me so bad Jimmy: alright Janis: is that denial or agreeance Janis: can't tell Jimmy: I reckon you can Janis: [makes noise 'cos indecent] Janis: yeah but Janis: you know I like hearing it Jimmy: yeah but Jimmy: if I say it again what are you gonna do about it Janis: [gives him a look like 'do it and find out'] Jimmy: [tells her out loud giving her a LOOK the whole time] Janis: [after hot n heavy makeout, pulling on him like come on 'cos privacy needed] Jimmy: [don't need to tell him twice, on you go you two] Janis: [lowkey forgot the point of this convo lmao off you go into the night babes]

1 note · View note