#(i am so over the 'feel bad because i can't talk to them anymore' phase the days after i've left have been the best in a while)

[applepies-and-starlight]

YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE. FUCK YOU TOO. I STILL STAND BY THE FACT THAT THE FISH WAS A BITCH AND THE FAMILY WAS NOTHING SHORT OF MISERY PORN.

[sports-talk]

*ೃ༄ jannik sinner on doping case .ೃ࿐

"it was difficult first of all because i couldn't open up to many people. it was a very complicated period because i didn't know how i had to behave, personally, i didn't know what would come out, i didn't know what would happen with the team. it was very difficult, normally i'm always in control, and instead there it was quite easy to lose it, control. after a few weeks i woke up one morning and said: "but in the end i didn't do anything wrong, i didn't know anything, and so for me it was already over, then what comes out from the judge, what can or can't come out in the end l can't control anymore, right?"

“of course, it was complicated when I knew but nothing had come out yet. maybe I won a match and they saw me really down and said to me: "but you won, why are you like this?" what was i supposed to answer? i said: "no, no, i'm fine, everything's fine." and then there were matches in which i didn't sleep the night before. as you probably saw, before the match with medvedev (qf at wimbledon). the night before i didn't sleep. then of course i felt bad in the morning. then i should have played 5 sets, it's not a match that ended in 3 sets.”

“there are many things that happened in this period that i tried to put aside and understand what is the right thing to do at that moment. and to me, i'm talking about myself now, i have to thank my team that was close to me the whole time because needed it. for example, darren didn't go home to australia and came to me, he was with me, my dad came. thanks to them i felt safe. protected. and precisely for this reason when i say that when you win tournaments or even matches that mean a lot, i always dedicate them to the people who are close to me, because without them i don't know how i could have overcome all of this. i’m happy with how i handled it because it was very difficult. but the moment i go on the court and put on my cap, for me only the tennis ball exists. on the court i feel safe. then we saw that it is difficult to play like that, but that is another matter. but i feel safe. when i see the ball and i am about to serve, all my focus and desire is to hit the ball on the court. because in the end it is my job and my passion. the problem and the work had to be separated. and i have always tried to feel good on the court, i have always trained, i have always prepared myself mentally to play tennis well and in the end it is precisely for this reason that I succeeded. also because, this is the most important thing, if i had known that it was my fault, in my opinion i would not have played like that."

"the real difficult moment in my opinion was right when the news came out. and it came out in a very delicate phase because it came before a grand slam. i wanted to train already since wednesday, the news came out on tuesday and we decided it was better not to, because there would have been too much chaos at the club and so we went on thursday, in the evening, because so many people would have left. we got there and we had all the cameras on us, it was very hard. i looked at the other players to understand what they really thought. i asked myself a lot of questions, it was difficult to prepare for a grand slam like that.”

“deep down, however, i am convinced that nothing happens by chance, and perhaps this case was precisely to understand who is your friend and who is not. and i separated these two matters. and i understood that there are many players who i didn't think were my friends, and there is a fairly large number who i thought were friends and instead they aren't. and in the end i don't say that this did me any good but it made me understand a lot of things."

[lunardeao3]

Hello, I need to talk to you

In addition to make me sound like a gf about to break up with you, it turns out I actually have something important to tell you.

For as long as I can remember, I've been dealing with severe depression which I don't really talk about because I don't really see the point in exposing myself like that. However, I know I have built myself a small community thanks to my fics on AO3 (yes, it's very small but still, you guys exist) and I'm incredibly thankful for your support but I also know it comes with expectations which, all in all, are more than legit. I have failed you guys a lot this year; my schedule is a mess (there's no schedule at all anymore), I haven't updated certain fics in forever and I take ages to reply when you comment when I used to answer fast before.

The reason to that is because I've been struggling a lot more than usual since last December with my mental health. I haven't posted as much as I'd like, as often as I'd like either. Hell, it's barely if I could write at all this year. I regularly receive comments and texts asking me when the next update is gonna be and although it makes me feel happy to see my content makes you craving for more, I'm not gonna lie, I feel bad reading these cause I'd love to give you more, so much more, but my health doesn't permit it.

Without giving too much details, I have been stuck in a hypersomnia phase since February/March on top of the rest of my usual symptoms which means I sleep around 13 up to 18h a day. I am in a constant low level of energy and tiredness which I don't seem to be able to get rid of for some reasons. And where I could write chapters and chapters while having insomnias, it's honestly impossible for me to produce anything good when I go through hypersomnia. It's like I'm constantly drowsy and nothing good can come out of this.

Honest, I even considered deleting the on-going fics I haven't updated in too long so you wouldn't be expecting another chapter soon. I would've obviously reuploaded them as soon as they were completed but I know some of you wouldn't have liked it to see them disappear so I kept them up despite the lack of updates.

I really didn't want to make that post, it's incredibly embarrassing for me and it sounds like I'm complaining, which I am not. I just thought that after over 6 months of struggles, it doesn't seem like it's going to get any better soon and so because I respect you, I think I needed to be honest about it. Thank you for your love and support through the years, I appreciate every single comments you guys leave on my works and feel grateful for the interactions we have and I'm deeply sorry these became more and more seldom.

I basically make this post to explain why there's a lack of updates but still expect them to come scarcely. I am not giving up on my fics, they all still mean a lot to me, but I can't tell when I'll post anymore cause it really depends on my energy which is not something I have control over.

The last chapter of the second year of Downfall should be coming soon by the way, I've been working on it for a little bit over a week (it makes me sick to say that when I used to do it in one day 💀). Keep an eye out for the update!

[onyxheartbeat]

Should I send it?

You're a horrible person I'm finally making myself see it. I'm not the forgiving person I used to be for you anymore, and I finally am accepting it instead of being in denial. emotionally withholding when I ask for scraps. I've accepted your breadcrumbs, when you felt like giving them. then you'd switch up. yet I was basically a therapist and mother to you when you needed. treat me like a toy on a shelf to play with only if you're in the mood. you have severe avoidant attachment, and you don't even realize how much misogyny you have. for someone with a psych degree, you're unaware. I didn't say your issues to spare your feelings. a selfish user of women. seems like I've been the biggest punching bag as from what you've told me, you didn't slap or call other women you've been with a cunt over and over and over and over, violating their boundaries. but you 'don't mean it like that,' and it's a 'joke.' taking your life crisis out on me, when I was genuinely trying to bond and help soothe you out of love. holding you when you cried. yet I cried alone. COWARD afraid to hear what have to say, telling me you won't read my letters. porn addicted. just view women as temporary. call your exes 'friends' probably just so you can have access to emotional support if you want it. I should've never talked to you after the first ghosting. promised you wouldn't again, yet you did it again, BLAMING ME and saying it was because I was sending angry texts. that was NOT why. and I still forgave you and put in the emotional labor to reconnect and tried to be on good terms. said I can just come to you and talk stuff out then flipping the script and saying horrible things to me when I do when you're drunk, or just flat out not even talking to me with any affectionate tone at all if you're sober. shaming me for addressing your verbally abusive language, screaming at me to shut the fuck up when I wasn't even interrupting you, telling me you're going to commit suicide and not answering for hours, being drunk and using that as an explanation for the behavior. you're not like that because you were drunk, that's just who you are and it lies dormant in you until you want to take it out on me. you don't act like this to men in your life, so don't even think for a second you're not a misogynist. as you said, you just 'want to destroy.' textbook abuser, intentional or not. you have no idea how much I've protected your ego and life. I was the man in the relationship, the father, and the mother. YOU needed ME. forgave you when you got on your knees and begged once. but when I needed you, you weren't there. you lovebombed me in the beginning, holding me, telling me you're my man. then now if I ask you to say those things, you tell me 'I can't lie tonight.' even though when YOU needed me to tell you that I'd take a flight out to see you a few weeks ago, I SAID I WOULD. I never screamed at you until yeaarrrrs later and so many screams from YOU first. I was so sweet and loving and you still had it in your heart to speak to me so disrespectfully. I would've never done that to you. I still haven't. what I truly will never understand is how you can just keep apologizing and claim you feel bad, yet never do anything with YOUR ACTIONS to make me feel loved or important or safe. you treated me normally for like three months and then it became like dealing with two different people. I deserve an award for dealing with your mood swings so well. gave you flowers, cards, gifts, but I don't even get birthday messages from you. it was clearly a chase for a honeymoon phase high for you. Look into fearful avoidant attachment style and heal yourself for the sake of your child. tell your therapist about your usage of women. teach your son how NOT TO BE. you're getting your way, again. you pushed me out. just know the feelings never ended for me. I was always real. this is your doing. Don't talk to me again.

[enkisstories]

Detroit. Halloween 2038.

Caroline Phillips sits alone in the Phillips penthouse' open floorplan living room.

Emma is out trick 'n treating with her best friend at whose place she will also spend the night. A decision made in the best interest of the girl, but perhaps not in her mother's, as it now begins to sink in.

*tickle, tickle*

Caroline: "A ghostly hand...? I know who THAT can only be! Haha, come over here, dearest! No need to stand!"

Someting invisible shuffles over and takes a seat on the couch, then, after some hesitation, makes itself a little more comfortable.

Caroline: "I missed... am missing you so much! Without you, everything is more difficult and nothing feels fulfilling anymore."

Daniel: "Assume I acted surprised."

Caroline: "I can hear you! But your voice has changed?"

*swoosh*

Out of habit, not need, the ghost swings his leg over the couch's backrest.

John Phillips' ghostly form has exactly the same powers and limitations as Daniel's, no more, no less. That really puts things into perspective. The last doubt drops off the man. Androids are alive (well, not his anymore, but in general). In replacing Daniel with a newer model and ticking the "disposal of old device" checkmark he had ordered the execution of a sentient being.

There'll be time for guilt later, right now something else is more important.

John: "Good evening, Daniel."

Daniel: "Huh? You?!"

John: "We'll talk in a moment. First..."

(Spoilered for length)

John: "I've missed YOU, too!"

Caroline: "J... ohn? Then who is that on my lap?!"

John: "Well, who is always looking after us, even now? Who came here early to keep you company, when I was late today?"

John: "Thank you, Da..."

Amazed at the change in his former owner's attitude, Daniel doesn't think of warning John of speaking his name out loud. The moment the man has finished it, Caroline lets out a piercing shriek and jumps up. Doing so, she phases through Daniel's ghostly form and shrieks again!

John: "Better now?"

Caroline: "A... little? I can feel you... Both of you."

John: "That's the closest we can come to the world of the living. And only tonight. And only because Daniel isn't fully dead yet."

Caroline: "Daniel is dying ever since August? I noticed that he had started lagging, but hadn't expected it to be this bad!"

Daniel: "I guess that settles whether I got my atrocious social skills from you or John..."

The accusation is solely in the dead android's voice. His hand on Caroline's shoulder to the contrary feels both supportive and a little clingy - in short, it feels distinctly like Daniel's, freed from his programming, would have felt in life, had not that terrible night occured.

Speaking of night... the family sits until the sun comes up. And when that happens, the men turn visible!

Daniel: "Before we go, we need to deliver a message. Or a challenge. See, it's November now. In the near future something will happen in Detroit, or TO Detroit. Two futures are looming ahead, both with some variations, and which one exactly will come to pass hinges on several factors, one of which being our mutual old "friend", Connor."

Caroline: "That scary thing?!"

Daniel: "My words exactly. So, the safest course of action would be to sell everything, take Emma and the fishes and move away from the city before mid-November. Nobody, myself included, would judge you for that or think lesser of you."

John: "Or you could take the car, drive to Ferndale and look for a decommissioned freighter. You'll find Daniel there, in a fashion. Sorry for being so cryptic. It'll be quite the scare, but you'll be alright. And then you need to... to... erm..."

Daniel: "Can't speak it out loud, huh? Oh, John..."

John: "To give away all our remaining money to "Daniel" and his crew, in order to prepare them for what is to come."

Daniel: "You'll be piss poor and shunned by everyone except for the most undesirable company for many years. But by allowing that to happen, the best of possible futures will get realized and after that difficult time you'll be happy and respected."

It was a dream, right? She had fallen asleep on the couch and dreamed of John and Daniel?

Everything would be alright without moving or giving away all her money...

[my-jokes-are-my-armour]

I wish I was willing to watch things that are enjoyed by everyone right now. I know I would probably enjoy several of these shows. But I simply don't want to watch or to be part of the thing.

My current experience of fandoms isn't very nice (not much in this bubble but more around it - like in general). I just feel strange to like certain things the way I do. I feel they linger longer in me than for most and I can't move on easily.

Yesterday I quitted a stream because the streamer had his mind done already over the game he was playing, and he was trashing every details before even trying to play it. And it reminded me all those witcher video on youtube. Millions of views for trahsing. Ghosting for mixed or positive points of view.

Was it a good game? I don't know, probably not, I don't care anymore. I really didn't want to enter that vibe. So I stepped out.

The fact that he did it, visibly knowing he was gonna hate it, and then finding obviously every stone to throw at it and himself to finally say this is trash and the game was an insult, every way possible, just triggered me bad. Justification. I have to test it, this is my fandom and my work.

Well I guess he feels trapped in something that he doesn't like anymore. That's valid, but why do I have to receive all that passive aggressivity?

The thing is I don't find many places where people enjoy the same things I do. I step out more and more often. Not because they don't like something I enjoy - I am capable to take an opinion -, but the way they don't like, if I make sense.

All details that are like unworthy and so rarely details that are good. Glorifying the bad before pushing the thing out to the bin. To the point where I begin to wonder. Do I really have bad tastes ? Do I have too simple needs to fill? Should I want more ?

So when I see other stuff that I could possibly enjoy, I am like. Hmmm well, how long before people would begin to trash it too ? Do I really want to get invested in something that will follow the same path as everything else that I enjoy ?

The same reason blocks me in writing/finishing my analysis. There are 3 of them rotting in my draft with edits I have made, things that I wanted to talk about, etc. So I put the smallest content. I try to avoid being too enthusiastic.

I am bit jealous that people can invest themselves in several fandoms. Jumping from turmoil to another. For me the transitioning phases look like more like me partying hard in silence. Then just giving up. Then I move on. And eventually pick up something new.

Why do I keep interest in things for so long each time ?! I am talking years there.

I still can't figure out if I am the problem, others are to me or if I just can't adapt to the fast pacing of fandoms.

[kurazaru]

The honeymoon phase of my college is over✨ I've started to slowly dislike some ppl... My roommate is too fucking touchy md annoying. Two of my roommates including this one talk shit abt my north Indian frnds. Like fuck y'all they r wayyyyy better nd understanding u guys could ever be. I hate the racism here. Idk why we as adults are so fucking divided by race. It's so goddamn shallow and disgusting. Refusing to accept an entire group of people just because they are frm the northern part of your own country is sooo narrow minded nd backward. And the same thing goes to my north Indian frnds who don't particularly like the south Indians, though it's not as much as the south Indians... And omg ive removed all my college frnds frm my CF on insta. Most of them were north Indians. They keep telling me "why are you posting such stories" and "stop posting stories of what you eat" like??? It's my fucking insta and hence it's my fucking choice. And it's not even some aesthetic insta bullshit, like I ate this one new chips and it was really good and so I posted abt it and they got offended like??? So yeah they aren't there anymore.

And I haven't found that "one frnd" you know. Like that one frnd who u can go to anytime. Like whenever I'm feeling down or just want peace I can go to their room nd chill or study. But I don't get that vibe frm any of my frnds.... Nd i feel like i won't be finding someone like that anytime soon... Nd i feel so undesirable coz almost everyone I see has that one frnd nd i don't.... I wanna go home dude... I tried spending time with 2 ppl nd I thought they could be that one person but then i tried testing something. I am the one who usually goes to their room and calls them to come and eat food with me, but this time I didn't do that fr like 2-3 days. They never called me. I felt really hurt dude. But it's fine ig. You can't expect everyone to like you. Or maybe I just hv a bad personality idk. Anyways I'm gonna keep to myself more now. I'm just gonna grind nd study nd have my own fun. Anyways IDC abt what ppl think of me or my interests. If I like something I will do it nd if i don't like it i won't. Simple. Im not changing anything for you. They aren't that close to me for me to change things I like abt myself. Anyways enough ranting fr todayyy

[nature-played-a-trick-on-me]

I've been following you for a while and I really admire your strength and will to get better! It is so, so difficult to even get to this part, you can be so proud of yourself even tho it's still more than difficult to get through the getting better phase. (note: better does mean whatever this means for you and not necessarily becoming a functioning member of capitalism) I am rooting for you and sending warm hugs!

That said: Your bf doesn't seem to be mature enough to be in a relationship at all, independent from your struggles. Because he is not willing to get better and he seems to be completely inconsiderate towards you and I bet this is a problem he'd have with another person, too. So this is not on you! I know it is not my place to say anything here, but I don't even know you or him but always feel disappointed in him when you talk about him. And if he doesn't make you feel good about yourself and doesn't support your healing journey as he should, then I don't know if he deserves to be part of that journey... And I think you need to think about if he really does help you on that journey or if he's (even unintentionally) hindering you. That doesn't mean he doesn't love you or you him, but gotta be real here: sometimes love is not enough, when a person (him in this case) still has a ton of growing up and self-discovering to do.

Thank youuuu I really appreciate this 💕💕💕 (lov for the wide definition of getting better as well)

It's difficult because in many other situations he is super considerate and happy to help out. I also often come here to vent and less so to gush about him so that might skew with how he seems.

We asked him to call me at a certain time with his decision and it worked, and we had a good conversation about it all. I definitely want to have conversations around issues before drawing my conclusions too strongly.

I know myself and I can easily get upset or overwhelmed and I don't want to make decisions based on those feelings, it's better to talk it over when I'm calmer and then I can figure out how I actually feel about the whole situation (instead of going by the initial 🚨🚨WAAAAH🚨🚨 induced by overwhelm and flashbacks )

We talked about his comments on my housekeeping recently and it ended up clearing a lot of stuff up and it's not really an issue anymore, so I do sort of trust we can talk through other issues as well!

His parents' house is on the verge of being a hoarder home and unfortunately getting increasingly full and dirty and offers to help out aren't accepted by his mother, his dad is ill and cannot help - it's just a complex situation he can't fix and neither can I. The atmosphere can be really bad and tense and it's not a place he can grow in and I'm getting so uncomfy there that I've asked to spend more time at my place instead. It's hard to overemphasise how choking that place is, he can barely even make a cup of coffee in peace... he's thought about therapy but thinks there's little point in it while he lives there. I don't entirely agree ( I mean a therapist could help him cope) but I do agree that moving out will probably improve his mental health in the long term and will give him room to grow.

Bf is on a waiting list for his own place with some support, he should be nearing the end of the waiting list in the next few months. I expect that moving out will help him and us a LOT. No longer having 24/7 hovering and not being in a dirty overfilled home... him living alone will also be a bit of a struggle at the beginning I think but ultimately it'll make things better for everyone.

TL;DR is like. I can react really strongly emotionally due to ptsd and other stuff, and in those moments I need to pull the hand brake and not act on those emotions in that moment.

When I've calmed down, we can successfully talk through things and figure them out. And he is moving out in the foreseeable future, where he will have more room to grow as a person.

[im-invisible-erased]

I just had to back off from someone who was going through that like.... BPD Mania phase when you get like a new FP/relationship and its all consuming and they start acting like really hot and cold towards someone else...(me) I can only handle so much of being talked down to like im a fucking child and that they're a genius talk before it starts effecting my own mental health... I'm really bad at just removing people because im always afraid they're going to track me down and try to get back at me for it

also there is a lot of like reasons to why I removed them they have caused me to split before and was constantly causing me to split the last couple of days and it wasn't entirely because of him showing symptoms of things. The main issue was that he said I never bothered to get to know anything about him. And unless I feel close to someone I don't really try to pry into peoples past or traumabond or anything. If someone wants to share that because they want to or trust me enough then they will... But he rarely did and him throwing that in my face I think made me snap. Like I didn't try to get to know him and I don't know anything about him... Then if he is causing my mental to go wack and split and me trying to constantly have to apologize and deescalate while he's being an asshole then fuck him if I don't know anything about him then I guess it's not a friend worth keeping around if that's how he feels. Self preservation? Idk ... I hate cutting people out like that but also he was mean and then love bombing after I apologized and just... No no.... There is a limit to how someone can treat me and he crossed the line too many times especially for someone I didn't consider that close)

Sigh why is protecting myself from severe splitting cause so much stress because I feel bad removing him from discord friends and since he randomly deleted his discord server we had In common next time he tries to contact he will just get the message I guess.

Like yes abandonment hurts and I just abandoned someone else but also I am not going to deal with someone splitting on me that is causing me to split on them and be the person that has to act like the bigger person and then they still try to do the stupid my life is worse than yours or I've overcome harder things. Or whatever you call the who is suffering more game that people like to do....and you know nothing about this.

Ugh whatever not my problem anymore.

Leave me alone forever.

Can't even sleep because I'm so stressed out over this.

[hallelujahmeatgod]

"Do you want to talk about it?"

KEN "DRAKEN" RYUGUJI X READER

+word count: 1580

+warning/s: cursing

+genre: kinda fluff, kinda comedic

"He's in his room and he haven't left that damn room since he arrived"

"He didn't even spare a glance around like he'd usually do, he just went straight to his room. He'd usually help around first before disappearing in there"

You nodded in understanding, looking around the brothel which just opened a few minutes ago.

The people at the brothel called you out of concern for Draken, saying he's been moody and not his usual self. They asked you if you know as to why he's acting the way he is but you haven't got a clue yourself. Quite frankly, you haven't seen Draken yourself for a few days since you've been taking care of family matters.

They asked you to come by since you haven't been in the brothel for quite a while, also to talk to Draken since none of them wanted to deal with him.

"I honestly don't have a clue, but I'll try talking to him. I tried asking Mikey about it but that kid isn’t any help either" You replied, giving them a soft smile for reassurance.

You asked Mikey about Draken before you went to the brothel but that kid just gave you a petty answer, so you're convinced that they're not the bestest of friends right now.

"Honestly, what would we do without you? Anyway, go and talk to his moody ass cause he's getting a little annoying for our liking. Then when you guys are done come out here and let's catch up and eat the snacks you bought!"

You nodded and made your way to his room. Thankfully he didn't lock his door so you were able to just enter. You were expecting to see him splayed on his bed or be working out but he's nowhere to be seen.

"Ken" You called out softly. No reply.

You set your school bag on the ground and walked further into his room. Just when you're about to walk past the bathroom you hear water gently splashing a bit inside.

You slowly opened the door and there he was in the tub, head resting back on the tub facing the ceiling, with his eyes closed. You can tell he's not relaxed at all because of the tensed muscles on his arm and his furrowed brows.

"That tub looks relaxing yet there you are still looking like you're about to fight someone" You said to get his attention. You leaned on the door frame as his eyes shot open.

"Y-Y/n" He said, looking a bit surprised, sitting up straight from the tub.

"Ken" You gave him a small smile.

"What are you doing here?"

"Am I not allowed here anymore?" You asked not too seriously.

"You are. You always are. It's just that you seem busy these days" He looked down at the water.

"I'm sorry for not being around, Ken" You gave him an apologetic look.

He shook his head lightly, still looking down at the water. "No need, I understand"

You stayed silent and just observed him. How he's looking intensely at the water, that you swear he could probably boil that water right now just by staring at it. How he's muscles are still nowhere near relaxed. How his breathing isn't steady. How his brows are still furrowed. And how his lips pout a little bit.

You pushed yourself from the door frame, walked up to him and crouched down beside the tub so that you're eye level with him.

"Ken, what's troubling you?" You asked, putting your hand on his nape and caressing it.

He slowly looked at you, looking vulnerable. A sight no one often gets to see, even you. It honestly pains you a little to see such a look from such a strong, stern man who's always got his composure.

He sighs, leaned over the tub and drops his head on your shoulder. "I-I... I'm just not that okay nowadays. I don’t even know anymore.” He admitted.

You hummed in understanding, caressing his nape all the way to his hair, pulling his hair tie to let his hair loose. You ran your hand through his hair, untangling some knots, and for the first time since you saw him he relaxed. You saw his shoulders drop slowly as he let out a breath.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"There's just so many things bugging my mind. Life here in the brothel, the gang, and other things. It's just one of those phases wherein everything dawns upon you" He sighs, lifting his head just to hide it on the crook of your neck.

"I texted Mikey before going here and he just gave me a petty reply. That also bothering you?" You asked, massaging water on his head to hopefully help him cool down.

"Yeah, we ended up arguing cause he’s not in a good mood and so am I. It's all just chaos in my head right now really" He groans, lifting his arms from the tub and wrapping them around you. You're a little soaked now but you didn't mind, all that matters is him.

He hugged you tighter and tighter until you guys were literally flushed against each other, soaking you more.

"I'm sorry, it's just that I badly wanted to just go to you, to seek refuge in you and just to lay and hold you like this, to calm my mind. But I knew you were dealing with family stuff and that it means a lot to you, so I just bottled it all in."

"It's okay" You pulled away just enough to see his face. You held his face in your hand and caressed his cheeks. "I'm sorry I wasn't around. But now I'm here, you don't have to go through such tough times on your own. It’s okay to feel sad sometimes, just take your time, I’ll wait for you'' You smiled, making him smile. You kissed the corner of his mouth making him roll his eyes. He pulled you on a proper kiss, sighing against your lips.

"Thank you" He said when you pulled away. "Thank you for always being by my side and showing me affection even though I tend to suck at it and sharing my feelings. Just how would I repay you"

"Repay me by relaxing properly, dropping the attitude towards other people, and reconciling with Mikey" He groaned at the last part which made you chuckle.

"What? You'd be doing the gang a favor if you take the initiative, Ken. We all know Mikey wouldn't dare do it, and the longer you guys aren't besties the more agonizing it'll be for the rest of the gang. Imagine the captain and the vice captain being petty, ugh, I already feel bad for all of them" You said humorously, making him pull away completely and sit back on the tub as he pouts.

"I'm always doing it." He pouted even more.

You chuckled, ruffling his hair. "You know Mikey can be an extreme kid when he's not beating up someone."

"Why do I always have to be the bigger person?" He said under his breath.

"I mean you are 6'1 and Mikey's only 5'3"

"You're lame" He immediately countered before laughing lightly, making you laugh too. If being lame means you'll get to hear this giant laugh, well maybe being lame isn’t too bad.

"IS THAT THE GIANT'S LAUGH THAT I HEAR?!" You heard someone say from the outside. Suddenly the door burst open revealing Remi.

Draken rolled his eyes, flipping her off and she flipped him off too.

"Now that the giant doesn't seem like an asshole anymore Y/n let's go and catch up!" She grinned, pulling you up and out of the bathroom, not giving you time to reply.

"Hey! You can't just take her away!" Draken protested, standing up from the tub quickly wrapping his towel around his waist.

He grabbed your wrist and pulled you, restricting Remi from pulling you away. He and Remi immediately looked at each other with daggers as they kept on pulling you. At this point they could definitely cut your body in half.

"Well I already am, what are you gonna do about it?" Remi spat.

"Umm….Pull her away from you? You midget" Draken spat back but more calmly, which is honestly annoying. It's always the most annoying when people talk back in a calm manner...or is that just me?

"At least I'm not as moody as you. You act way worse than a woman on her period or a pregnant lady!"

They went back and forth with you still in between them. For every comeback they kept on pulling you.

"OKAY! Kindly shut the fuck up you two?" You smiled sarcastically at both of them, pulling your arms from them. They both pouted and huffed like little kids, turning away from each other.

"I'll go with Remi now since it has been a while since I saw them." You said, making Remi light up and Draken give you an offended look.

"WHAT--" Draken was about to protest but Remi burst into laughter pulling you to the door. You shrugged at Draken as he gave you a narrowed look and mouthed "traitor"

"Oh-- and when you're done, change the bulb in the lounge room, jerk!" She stuck her tongue out.

"Seriously, when will I ever catch a break-- you know what? Just get out you two!" He groaned, making you and Remi laugh.

[whatifyoulivelikethat]

friendships and growing apart(?)

I feel like my best friend and i are growing apart.

A couple of days into the new year i found out my best friend has basically been lying to me for a while now.

We graduated last year and happened to be accepted in the same university and everything was going great, at least for me. It was my most desired choice and i was over the moon. It wasn't my bff's first choice but it still fit what she wanted so she was still happy. Even more since we were also gonna live together.

We moved in together and started uni together and everything was going great. It was all new and kinda scary but you know, that's how life is. Everything was going great or at least i thought.

A couple of days after the new year's she texted me that she wants to stop going to uni, because she doesn't like it and she did it only because she saw the reactions of people when sb would say they don't want to continue their studies and to please her parents. She told me that she liked absolutely nothing about uni although she loved living with me. She told me she had been miserable all this time and she can't do it anymore. She stresses too much about uni work ,to the point of hurting herself , and the social relations that come with it and also told me she doesn't really like the city the uni is in either.

I'm not mad at her about feeling like that. It's normal to have those moments. We have both been through quite a lot and seen each other at our worst. What i'm mad about is that she knows me better than my mom, we talk about everything, EVERYTHING, and she knows i would have never judged her if she told me from the start that this wasn't what she wanted. I want only her happiness and well-being. What i'm mad about is that she never told me, not even hinted about those feelings. We were together pretty much all the time and she never gave any indication she didn't like how her life was turning out.

So i feel a little betrayed. I hope it's not selfish but i do. When she was telling me all that it sounded as if she blamed me and everyone that loves her and that makes me super mad. I know her family and i know all of her close friends so i know for sure NOBODY would have judged her, nobody. And as i said before, especially me.

There are a lot of complications that come along with her decision that are not worth mentioning but, ever since we had that talk we've been kinda distant. I ask her how she is every day and all i get are curt responses that lead to no further talk. That has been going on for a month. A couple of days ago she also told me that she doesn't really love kpop as much as before and that she thinks she is growing out of that "phase". That irritated me for a lot of reasons but all you need to know , is that this is extremely unusual of her in a very bad way.

I hope i'm not selfish. It's just that i've always been so clear about what i want and what i fear and i thought she was too, so when that all happened it felt like a low blow. I truly felt betrayed. I don't really let people close to me, so when i find someone i like i really cherish and show that person they mean a lot to me and i felt like i've done that with her. I am good at reading people, all my life whatever i've "predicted" about the social connections around me has happened so me getting the cold sholder feeling from her frightens me to no end. Because she is like a sister to me and i don't want her to ruin her life and i definitely don't want her to leave mine.

I'm scared, confused and sad, please give me your advice.

No matter who it is - friend, family member, spouse, anyone - it is their choice when it comes to what they want to share. In fact, sometimes the closer you are to someone, the more you want to hide specific feelings from them, especially if they are negative.

I understand that perhaps you may not feel this way. It is not your nature to hide yourself from those close to you because part of showing how important that bond is to you is sharing everything that you are thinking. Since opening up is not easy for you, you place great importance in the other person reciprocating the same. When they do not, it feels like a breach of trust. Questions start swimming in your head. Have you not been a good friend? You've given so much; why could she not give you the same? How could she keep her feelings from those most important to her? Especially you, you could have done something; you could have helped, couldn't you?

Take a deep breath.

It is very likely that she did not tell those closest to her for several reasons. Perhaps she felt they would try and pressure her into continuing university. She has already admitted she felt pressured by society in general to attend in the first place. Maybe she felt the weight and responsibility of living with you, which I assume is not for free. It's also likely that for a long time she has been thinking about if she truly felt this way or if it was simply nervousness from being in a new environment. She ultimately decided to give it a try, at least a semester, and see if she could power though this initial feeling. Regret about a huge life decision is not a small thing. And, finally, perhaps she knows you so well that she felt that she could anticipate your reaction to her declaration and has been avoiding it, until these emotions have reached their peak and she could no longer keep them in any longer.

To you, this feels like a huge bomb has been dropped on you. For her, she has felt this probably since graduation, maybe even before. But everyone around her keeps telling her to go to university. Shouldn't she be excited to start the next chapter in her life? Shouldn't she be excited to live with her best friend? Shouldn't she feel elated to tackle the next challenge? That's what everyone else is doing.

Right?

In her eyes, she sees you handling the pressures so easily. Maybe she even envies how you are thriving and/or she feels that she would ruin your experience by even mentioning her reservations. She couldn't tell her close friends and/or family - what if you find out that she told them first and not you? Perhaps this is the reason she told no one and kept it all inside.

You are not selfish for caring. You are not selfish for wanting the best for her. You are selfish for thinking that this is betrayal to you. This is not about you. This is about her uncertainty for her own future, about her frustrations in not knowing her path and perceiving that others around her have it "all figured out". It's not true, but she can't quite see that. Being told you should like something and then realizing you actually don't is confusing. On top of that, this is university, her very important future, taught by family, friends, and media that she should feel a certain way and she just doesn't.

And that is terrifying.

How you feel is how you feel, both for you and for her. You are allowed to feel hurt that she didn't mention these things until now. She is allowed to not say anything until she was ready to talk. When you say that you feel that she should have said something, that is your opinion. When you say that you would have said something if you were in her position, that is also your opinion. She had her own opinion about when she felt that she was able to voice her concerns. I don't believe she was trying to be malicious by keeping it from you. I think her intent was to protect you and this important friendship. It didn't quite work but you can't know that until the aftermath.

Talk to her about this. "Hey, can I ask you why you kept it in so for long?" I know it may be tempting to add how you feel about it, but hold back for a moment and listen to what she has to say. "Did you feel pressured because I was excited to live and experience university with you?" Understand that even though you had no malintent, it is possible that it happened to have a negative effect. It doesn't mean that you were wrong for feeling happy about it. It only means that life, emotions, people, they are all complicated. Let her know your concerns.

"I don't want you to feel so bad to the point of hurting yourself. I want you to know that I am here to support you. Are there things I could do better as your friend? Please tell me honestly."

Be willing to receive what she has to say. It may be unpleasant. It may be something you do not want to hear. Before you start formulating your response to her answer, stop. Listen. She is telling you these things in a vulnerable state. Consider what she is telling you objectively. Although you have good intent, it may not always be perceived that way. That is nobody's fault. Depending on your emotional state, your perception of the situation will differ. Encourage an open communication. Determine why she did not feel comfortable doing so before and learn from it. Although you may feel it is important for you to share everything with her, she might feel that she does not want to stress you out with her negative emotions and that is how she shows that she cares about you.

You are not less important to her because she didn't share. You may be the most important person and she might have been scared that she was disappointing you by not enjoying university as much as you do.

As for her saying that she doesn't love kpop as much as before, I do not think it is a dig at the music. Very likely it is because kpop is full of happy memories and right now it is hard for her to enjoy. But also, the music people listen to fluctuates all the time. I don't quite know the context and it is hard to tell what she meant by it, so I am simply throwing that option out there. For me, I also stopped listening to kpop for some years because it was something I used to listen to when I was going though some dark shit. I stepped back and came back when I was ready (*cough* and somehow started a porn blog *cough*).

Ask her about her future, what she would like to do, and how you can best support her. She may not know. Would it help if you offered suggestions? Or is it better to not pressure her about the future and just see where it goes? Is she thinking of taking a gap year to find out what she wants to do? Perhaps she can try a variety of hobbies and find something that suits her. She can always go back to secondary education, no matter how old she is. It is important to support her now more than ever. Although you may not always be physically together anymore, it will be interesting for both of you to share your varied life experiences. With that aid of technology, you really can still spend so much time together.

I believe you both can get through this. It's possible that your friendship will grow and become even stronger. The wonderful thing about friendship is how people from different walks of life can get along, support, learn, and grow from one another.

One from the moon, one from the stars.

Alexa, play 'Friends' by BTS. :)

[jaedreaminn]

Final Part

Characters: Taeyong, Ten, Mark, Jeno, Heachan.

Theme: Family bonding, humour, crack, fluff,angst, happy ending.

Parings: «mentioned» someone x Haechan, someone x Ten.

Words: 2.3k

~~~

"You're the first one here" Ten smiled at Jeno who had just walked into the bar.

"I've always been on time and you know that" Jeno smiled sliding into the booth, sitting next to Ten.

"God knows who you got that good habit from because no one in our family is on time unless it's absolutely necessary" Ten teased and Jeno's eyes disappeared into half moons. "And from what I remember you were always late to school."

"I wasn't late hyung I skipped school" Jeno deadpanned and Ten cringed, "Yea the Jeno delinquent phase was definitely.... interesting"

"Ahh I miss those times because atleast my friends-" "Can you even call those people friends?" Ten interrupted and Jeno glared at him, so he simply mouthed an apology and went back to sipping his water as Jeno continued to speak, "Atleast my friends then were scared of me so they never said anything. Now if I'm late I have to deal with an angry Renjun and his wrath is the scariest thing on this planet." Ten cringed silently at the mention of the smaller boy as he remembered experiencing Renjuns anger first hand and it wasn't pretty.

"Thank God for that though, otherwise I would be sitting here alone on my bachelor party"

"True that" Jeno said lifting his glass of water and clicking it with Tens glass.

"How boring, you guys are only drinking water" Donghyuck said as a form of greeting sliding into the booth, sitting on the other side of Ten.

"I'm waiting for everyone to arrive before ordering the food and drinks" Ten said rolling his eyes and then flicked Donghyucks arm, "And I wouldn't have to wait so long if you were on time"

"Ow!" Donghyuck whined rubbing his arm as Jeno chuckled.

"So how are things going for the two of you" Jeno asked eyes grinning mischievously as Donghyuck sighed and dreamy sigh, "Better, I think I want to make it official soon"

"About time!" came Taeyongs voice and all three of them looked up to see him walking towards the table.

"How did you even hear what Hyuck was saying from so far away" Jeno asked and Ten chuckled when Taeyongs face scrunched up in judgment as he took of his coat, "I raised you people, I just know"

"That doesn't make sense" Haechan frowned and Taeyong glared at him as he folded his coat and sat down.

"I've been raising you since I was thirteen I would be damned if you doubted my super hearing"

"Fine fine Whatever you say" Haechan lifted his hands up in surrender and Taeyong grinned scanning the table, "Where's Mark?"

"He isn't here yet" Ten said and Taeyong frowned.

"You're telling me these two have been here before Mark?" Taeyong asked pointing at the two youngest at the table earning protests from both.

"Yep" Ten said popping the 'p'.

"But dont worry he should be here soon" He added, reassuring Taeyong.

"Right, we're here to celebrate you getting married" Taeyong cheered changing the topic and Ten grinned like a fool in love.

"Yeah I can't believe the wedding is so close" He said smiling excitedly.

"About time you two have been engaged forever" Jeno scoffed but the smile on his face showed how happy he was for his brother.

"I know we're basically married" Ten chuckled as the others cheers'd to that.

"Ahhh sorry I'm late" Mark said rushing in sitting on the chair opposite Ten.

"What's with all the bags Markie?" Donghyuck asked curiously looking at the the five small paper bags in his hands.

"Well I remembered something from when all of us went camping and I thought now was a good time to do this" Mark said laughing nervously, "But I'm not sure if you guys would really like it now" he said handing everyone a bag.

Ten peeked inside and immediately smiled, "Oh wow I forgot that we wanted to do this" he said pulling out a cap with the words 'The Lee brothers' written in neat cursive.

"Oh yea we wanted matching caps for the five of us because we thought shirts were too tacky" Donghyuck chuckled holding onto his cap as of it was his greatest treasure, while smiling brightly.

"Wow we really love these Mark, can't believe we almost forgot about this" Taeyong chuckled looking at his cap with awe and then his eyes brightened "It even has my name on the back"

"Yea it does and I also almost forgot about this too" Mark smiled brightly as he saw his brothers looking at the caps with smiles on their faces.

"Our family isn't very normal is it?" Jeno smiled and the others nodded.

"To think we were this close to being eachothers worst enemies" Ten laughed and Taeyong frowned, still not able to joke about it.

"Yea that was crappy of me" Taeyong said looking down at his glass of water as he remebered how he treated Ten and Donghyuck.

"I can't believe you still beat yourself up over that hyung you were a kid! You were allowed to feel angry and be defensive and irrational" Donghyuck said grinning brightly and a small sad smile graced Taeyongs face because a smile from Hyuck was contagious, "And at the end of the day you came around and now we've got such a strong bond. And you did a lovely job as an older brother I mean look at how I turned out" Donghyuck smiled proudly.

"I thought we were making him feel better not worse. You turned out to be a pain in the ass" Jeno said with a playful smile on his face and Donghyuck pretended to be shot, looking at Jeno in betrayal as Jeno smirked proudly like an evil villan.

"We really need to seperate those two because Jeno has been catching on to Donghyucks dramatic attitude" Ten said watching the two youngest judgingly and Mark just drank (his water) to that.

"Please you're one to talk Ten" Taeyong scoffed rolling his eyes, "You're the one who taught that brat how to be dramatic"

"I object"

"Hyung that's not how it works" Mark sighed, smiling at Ten.

"Ahhh I agree with Taeyong, I am who I am because of Ten" Donghyuck chuckled and shifted away from Ten quickly as the other tried to hit him.

"Ya come here I'll show you dramatic" Ten yelled, trying to attack Haechan who was hiding behind Mark.

"You always hide behind Mark as if Mark would fight for you" Jeno rolled his eyes and Donghyuck stuck out his tongue.

"If I think any of you would attack Mark I wouldn't hide behind him cus he's a weak little baby but I know none of you guys would hurt a hair on Marks head so he's the safest to hide behind"

"He's not wrong" Taeyong shrugged.

"That and Donghyucks favourite is Mark" Ten complained and Donghyuck grinned nodding his head and Mark just sighed trying his best to order drinks for everyone with Donghyuck standing behind him and Ten ready to pounce in their direction at any moment.

"When did he even get so attached?" Jeno asked latching himself onto Tens arm. Ironic.

"Probably the first time Mark spoke during dinner without us having to ask him anything" Taeyong chuckled at the memory and everyone smiled.

"I was so amused that he was an actual person with feelings" Donghyuck perked up from behind Mark who glared at the boy and flicked him on the head.

"I'm not safe anywhere" Donghyuck whined running to Taeyong and dramatically falling onto his lap.

"I was just excited about a song I liked that day and I felt so concious the way all of you looked at me with big eyes" Mark said recalling the memory with a frown.

"Yea it was a quite dinner that day because Jeno and Hyuck were fighting at it got awkward to talk and suddenly out of the blue YOU, of all people spoke." Taeyong said smiling looking at the two youngest who just stuck their tongues out at eachother at the mention of their 'fight'

"Yeah I remember, they were fighting over something very stupid and they got so excited that Mark had spoken that they completely forgot about their fight" Ten chuckled whole heartedly joined by Taeyong and Mark.

"Now that I remember we left our fight half way I'm not talking to you anymore Jeno" Haechan said, puffing his chest and pouting.

"You're really high maintenance you know" Jeno said coking an eyebrow and Haechan just laughed at that statement, not denying it.

"Yeah you are. You once tried jumping out of the second floor window because someone told you you were to much of a coward to do so" Mark said with a frown, accusingly pointing his finger at their youngest. Jeno wasn't wrong, dealing with Donghyuck wasn't an easy task.

"Oh yea I remember Jeno couldn't stop Hyuck so he ran to Mark's classroom which was closest and then came all the way to the other building to get us" Taeyong said with a lopside smile.

"Ahhhh yess I remember you people scolding me so much and Jeno refused to speak to me the entire day at school and then cried when we got home" Donghyuck chuckled as Jeno blushed.

"I'm sorry I was scared that you were going to die!' Jeno yelled defensively and everyone laughed.

"Mark yelled at me so much and scared everyone in my class and then oh god when Taeyong and Ten walked in angry I almost shat my pants"

"Angry Taeyong is a scary Taeyong" Mark shuddered.

"Even your mother was scared of you angry and you were only thirteen back then" Ten smiled at Taeyong cheekily and the boy just sipped on his drink that arrived a while ago looking elsewhere.

"Well I was pissed that they kept dragging Hyuck into their petty arguments. God I hate that woman so much." Taeyong said, getting angry.

"I feel bad that I haven't invited them to the wedding because at the end of the day they took me in when my parents died but I just hate them so much" Ten frowned and Mark patted his brothers back.

"Dont worry we all hate them, they would have spoilt everyone's mood." Mark said and then scoffed, "Dad's finally given up on trying to persuade me to steal your business" Mark chuckled and Ten smiled at him.

"Yea now he's trying to persuade me." Jeno rolled his eyes and Ten chuckled.

"Like, as it is we have stability because of our shares now he's being greedy again? Didn't his greed ruin our lives enough" Mark said clutching onto his drink angrily.

"The only good thing that came out of his greed was Hyuck" Taeyong said hugging the youngest who just looked sullen.

"I wouldn't say good thing... their fights got worse because of me. I mean I don't blame Mrs. Lee for hating me" Haechan said eyes downcast.

"No don't make excuses for that woman" Jeno growled.

"But I'm the reason her marriage was compromised." Haechan frowned.

"She compromised her own marriage because she was an awful person no one wanted to spend the rest of their life with and she had no right to take it all out on you" Mark said angrily clutching onto his drink.

"No Mark you don't get it, it was only fair to hate me" Haechan said with a frown and Ten and Taeyong looked at eachother with worry, patting the yongers back.

"She had no right to hate you" Mark said getting angrier by the second and Jeno tried to calm his brother down. This always was a sensitive topic.

But Heachan nodded his head in disagreement, "I was born because her husband cheated on her"

"And I was born because she cheated on her husband" Mark yelled and everyone at the table looked at him wide eye'd.

"This is one hell of a bachelor party" Jeno said reaching for his drink, still shocked at what Mark had just said.

"Mark what are you saying..." Taeyong asked, placing a hand on Marks knee as Mark tried his best to avoid evryone gaze.

"I didn't know how to tell you guys but that's why dad stopped bothering me, because he recently found out I'm not his son" Mark said eyes downcast and then scoffed, "So now he's cut all ties with me"

"Oh I'm going to go punch that greedy old bastard" Jeno said with a growl to his tone and his fists clenched.

"Dont waste your time I don't care but it hurt how easy it was for him to drop me and now I hate my mother even more considering she knew about this since I was born but still fought with dad over him cheating and gave Hyuck crap for it" Mark frowned.

"Ugh this is so fucked up" Ten said taking a chug of his drink.

"I'm not a Lee" Mark sniffed, "I'm not your brother"

"Ahhh thats bs we're all brothers" Haechan said hugging Mark from behind.

"Yea and we've been through hell and back together" Ten grinned.

"And we'll always have eachothers backs and there's no easy way for you to get out of being our brother" Jeno said lightly punching Mark on his shoulder.

"I haven't raised you all my life for you to think I'm not your brother" Taeyong smiled and Mark chuckled slightly at that.

"Taeyong you're not their brother you're basically their mother" Ten said and everyone chuckled.

"Yea the constant nagging and the obsession with cleanliness and Febreze" Haechan said with a laugh and everyone chuckled.

"Yea so I don't know why you thought anything would change Mark" Jeno chuckled and Mark smiled.

"Yea we had messed up parents but luckily we have eachother" Taeyong said and Mark smiled.

"Yea we're definitely all Ten has" Haechan said wiping a fake tear, "No friends, just his brothers to have his bachelor party with"

"Okay now you're dead" Ten said chasing Donghyuck around the bar.

It resulted in them getting kicked out but they all laughed as they made their way to cafe moon, talking animatedly and happily.

The night was long and their futures prosperous.

~~~

The Lee Brother's- A mini series

Previous Part: Lee Donghyuck

[obsidiancreates]

I posted 13,285 times in 2021

1208 posts created (9%)

12077 posts reblogged (91%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 10.0 posts.

I added 417 tags in 2021

#danny phantom - 183 posts

#long post - 37 posts

#vent - 31 posts

#rant - 30 posts

#vic - 30 posts

#sid does makeup - 30 posts

#fanfic - 20 posts

#my attempts at fanfic - 19 posts

#my ocs - 19 posts

#what we do in the shadows - 18 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#louie and wakko run a scam where they sell the things wakko pulls form seemingly nowhere but  the  scam is  that those items cease to exist

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

Two Halves Are NOT Better Than One

When Danny's parents found out he was Phantom after a fight gone wrong, he thought they'd taken it surprisingly well. They apologized for shooting at him, helped patch him up, and sent him to rest. For a week, he heard nothing more about it.

And then he walked into his house, Sam and Tucker behind him, and was blasted in two.

Tucker caught the Human Danny, and Sam caught the Ghost Danny.

"Got 'im!" Jack pumps his fist with joy while Maddie lowers the gun, smiling.

"WHAT THE HECK WAS THAT?!"

"We saved Danny!" Jack gestures to the Human Danny. "Ghosts were after him because of his condition, so now they won't be!"

"But you split him in half! The last time this happened it was terrible!" Sam shakes Ghost Danny at them (he's very light of course, like a tuft of fuzz).

"Into a hippe slacker and an old cartoony superhero, right?" Jack says. "We prepared for that! His brain isn't split like that this time, don't worry!"

Sam and Tucker share a look. Yeah, they're still worried. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"How many fingers am I holding up?"

Danny is frowning, arms crossed. "Three."

Maddie grins. "Perfect! Alright, now-"

"Mom. Give me back my ghost half."

"It's too dangerous, sweetie. But don't worry, your father is making sure it's also functioning right. And it'll stay with us until it's adjusted."

"He, Mom."

"Sure. He."

Jack nocks on the door, and slowly opens it. He has a sheepish grin. "So... you know how ghosts can go through walls? The good news is the Ghost has that power working just fine."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Danny slams his locker shut. "I feel worse than when Spectra was counseling everyone!"

"Because you can't phase out of lockers anymore?" Tucker asks.

"Because of all of it! I swear, I'm about one bad piece of luck away from-"

"Hey, Fen-Turd!" Dash picks up Danny by his shirt collar. "What's wrong with you? Miss your Nerd Club? Ha!"

Danny scowls. "Not in the mood today, Dash."

Dash drops him. "Not in the mood, huh? Then let's see who is!"

He grabs Tucker next. "Hey Drool-y! Let's see how you look with this stupid beanie stuffed down your throat- AHCK!"

Dash drops Tucker as Danny leaps to tackle him like a raccoon! Dash doesn't fall over, but screams and stumbles as Danny tries to take him down, completely clinging to his torso!

"AHHHHHHHH! GET HIM OFF OF ME! GET HIM OFF!"

"I'M GOING TO TAKE ALL MY RAGE OUT ON YOU!"

"NOOO! NOT A TASTE OF MY OWN MEDICINE! THAT FORTUNE TELLER WAS RIGHT!"

See the full post

243 notes • Posted 2021-10-13 12:54:33 GMT

#4

Good For Now (Sequel to Pushing Buttons (Until They Break))

(I'll put part one in the reblogs)

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Danny flies right into Sam's room, hands still gripped over his mouth. There's ectoplasm leaking from where his nails are digging in now. He looks for her, and sees her at her computer playing Doomed.

He flies over and becomes visible again. Sam nearly jumps out of her skin. "Ah! Danny, what the heck-! Whoa." She takes off her headset. "Danny, are you okay."

He tries to speak. His voice still won't work. Danny shakes his head.

Sam turns towards him competently, turning off her computer. "What happened? Can you talk about it?"

Another head shake.

"Was it a ghost?"

Shake.

"... You parents?"

... Hesitant nod.

"Did they hurt you?"

His eyes well up again. When he shakes his head, the tears fall.

"... Did... did you... hurt them?"

... A nod. And a sob. And then he stiffens at the sound, curling in on himself a little.

Sam's eyes go wide. Clutching his mouth, can't talk, can't even make a small sound... "Did you Wail at them?"

Danny shakes.

"Oh, geez... okay, I'm going to call Tucker. Is that okay?"

Danny nods.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Okay, okay, how do we find him?" Jack has various gadgets spread out on the table. "The Fenton Ghost-Finder? It's not our most advanced, but there's no weapons attached to it."

"What about the Boo-oo-merang?" Maddie suggests. "It's always locked onto him."

"It hits him in the head, remember?" Jazz points out. "Why can't we just call him?"

"He left his phone," Maddie sighs. "And even if he had it, I think that scream broke all the electronics in the room."

"Scream?" Jazz twists her hands together. "Okay, well, we know he probably didn't go far. What did you guys say to him? Anything that might've caused an extra intense reaction?"

"How does that help?" Jack inspects the rest of the gadgets for any weapon features.

"It'll let us know what kind of comfort he might need to seek out!"

Maddie and Jack think. "He didn't like when we mentioned blowing up ghosts," Jack says.

"Well, duh. But that wouldn't make him mad enough for that amount of damage, you guys say that all the time."

See the full post

331 notes • Posted 2021-10-08 14:21:08 GMT

#3

Born This Way (Because Of Negligence Towards Basic Scientific Safety)

(IDK how far apart the Fenton kids are in age, so Jazz is an Undetermined Age Where She's A Toddler But Also Very Verbal. Maybe it's the Genius Genes letting her learn faster. Let's go with that.)

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Maddie coughs, spitting out another glob of ectoplasm. "Well, at least know it's not an issues with the cooling system."

Jack sneezes out the ectoplasm stuck in his nose, and then grins and stands triumphantly. "Still a step towards success!"

Jazz frowns from where she's playing with her doll, safe within a Fenton Anti-Ghost Toddler Chamber. "Mommy, you should cover your mouth." She points at her own mouth. "Mr. Wummy on TV says dat getting weird stuff in your mouth is bad."

"Mr. Wummy is a cartoon, dear. We're seasoned scientists, we know what we're doing." She wipes herself off, and sits down. "If there were any side-effects to accidental ecoplasmic consumption, we'd know."

"But what if Danny doesn't like it?" Jazz point at her mother's belly.

Maddie pats her belly. "The baby is still just a fetus, sweetie. It can't tell what it does and doesn't like yet. And why are you so sure it'll be a boy?"

"Because I'm your baby girl. So now you need a baby boy!"

Maddie tilts her head and smiles lovingly at her daughter. "Oh, you're adorable." Nothing cuter than Child Logic.

Maddie stands back up, and puts her hands on the workbench. "Now, let's see about that firing mechanism..."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Maddie brushes her teeth, sighing when her toothbrush comes away glowing green. "We really messed up a lot of experiments today. I think I swallowed a whole ghost's worth."

Jack spits a similarly colored mouthful of toothpaste foam out. "At least it doesn't taste as bad as it smells."

Maddie puts her hands on her belly, the bump now quite obvious. "II hope we're right about it not having side effects."

Jack's expression softens. He gently pulls his wife into a comforting hug. "The doctors all say he's as healthy as can be, Mads. You don't need to worry."

"I still worry anyway, though."

"Of course you do. You're his mom! But we'll worry together, and if you ever need me to, I'll do the worrying for us both! While you relax and give him more tips on how to avoid ghosts once he learns to walk."

Maddie giggles, and sighs. It'll all be fine... nothing to worry about.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Jazz has her arms crossed, a teddy bear hanging from one hand. "Five times!"

"Yes, and did we mention we're so proud that you can count so we-"

"Five times!" She shouts again, waving her little sticky toddler hand at them. "I saw you eat the bad green stuff five times!"

"We didn't eat it," Maddie says patiently, "It got into our mouths by accident."

"You swallowed it!"

"Only a tiny bit, only on accident, dear."

Jazz puts her hand on her mom's belly. "Danny is gonna be here soon and he's gonna be mad!"

"He won't even know it happened, sweetheart."

"Yes he will! He'll be the smartest ever, just like me and like you and like daddy! And he'll be so upset and never stop crying!"

See the full post

395 notes • Posted 2021-10-05 14:41:58 GMT

#2

An Honest Talk

(Got to the episode where Valerie gets the ghost hunting stuff. I just want her to be happy and not Filled With Vengeful Rage so, here's this.)

Jazz sees the whole thing.

Really, Valerie isn't even good at hiding it. As soon as that Ghost Hunter shows up at that school game, Jazz figures it out. Not just because her voice is the same, but because of the insults she shouts while hanging in that basketball hoop. Sure, Jazz is in a higher grade, but she's heard that A-Lister group plenty of times in the hallways and after school.

They're real jerks. But not murderous jerks.

So she decides to do something about it. No-one attacks her baby brother. ... Well, except other ghosts. But Jazz can't always help with those.

This? No problem.

"Hey, Valerie."

Valerie jolts, yelping and almost dropping what is clearly some kind of ghost-detecting device. "Who are- ugh, aren't you Fenton's sister? What do you want?"

"To talk to you," Jazz says in her most empathetic voice. "I noticed you're having kind of a rough time."

"Why do you care?"

"Because my brother does." Cares about not being pummeled, at least. But Jazz is sure Danny hopes the best for his schoolmate, even with the attacks.

Valerie huffs. "Great, pity from the loser kids."

"Come on, it won't hurt to talk about it?"

"Talk about what? That some ghost kid and his dog ruined my life? That we're broke, and all my friends hate me for it? yeah, talking will fix everything."

Jazz sits down on a bench, and pats the seat next to her. Valerie looks away.

But then... she sighs. And sits. "I keep thinking about that five hundred dollar shirt I ruined. Maybe if e hadn't bought that, or I hadn't worn it to school, we'd be a little better off right now."

"It's not your fault."

Valerie grits her teeth. "Yeah. It's that ghost kid's."

"Ghost kid?"

"... You believe in ghosts, right? Because of your parents?"

Jazz nods. "Plus, that thing during the school game,, Kind of hard to deny."

"Heh. Yeah. ... That dog broke into the place my dad was working for. he was showing off what he did for their security, and none of it stopped the dog or the kid. And then they showed up again at the garage sale and wrecked our moving van, and the dog stole my lunch after all my friends rejected me!"

Valerie wipes her eyes, scowling. "It's not fair!"

Jazz hands her a tissue. "It's not, not at all."

"I wanna destroy that kid," Valerie growls. "Like he destroyed me."

"... Valerie... how old is he?"

"About my age, I think."

"And he's a ghost."

See the full post

724 notes • Posted 2021-10-04 09:20:28 GMT

#1

Pushing Buttons (Until They Break)

“Danny, we need to talk.”

Oh, brother. Danny looks up from his Doomed game. “About what?”

His parents stand in his room, both concern looking and... a little ticked off, too. Danny already hates this conversation.

Maddie holds up a report card. “We knew you were struggling in school, Danny, but this is absurd. You’re failing every class except Lancers, and we know he lets you retake tests more often than he lets other students.”

Danny looks back at his game. “I’m just having a hard time, okay? Normal teenager stuff.”

“And we get that, son,” Jack says, walking over and picking Danny up out of the chair. “But this is getting serious. We thought you were just being lazy, but now we’re really worried.”

“... Now? Now you’re worried?”

Maddie nods. “Is something going on, Danny?”

“Is something... going on?”

“Go on, out with it.” Jack pats Danny’s back. “We’ll support you however we can.”

Danny grits his teeth and pulls away from his dad. “Like when you spun around at high speeds when you thought I was hallucinating?”

Jack and Maddie don’t meet his eyes. Not their finest moment as parents, and they know it. ... Especially after Jazz lectured them about it.

“Look, I’m fine.” Danny moves to try and get back to his computer. “Nothing for you two to worry about.”

“But we do worry, Danny,” Maddie says, clasping her hands. “We’re your parents. We just want to keep you safe.”

“Like when I had The Accident?” Danny snaps before he even realizes he was about to speak at all. He immediately regrets it, turning around. “I get that you worry, just-”

“No.” Jack stepps in front of Danny, and... and his eyes are watering. “I think we need to go back. Do you... blame us, for The Accident?”

Yes. “No, I don’t know why I said that. Just uh, lashing out, I guess.” Danny goes for a smile and hopes they just leave.

“Danny, sweetie.” Maddie comes up behind him and puts a hand on his shoulder. “We thought you were okay, that you’d moved on.”

Moved on. Those words sting a little, down to his Core. He can’t move on, not even if he wanted to. “I did, it’s fine. Can I go back to my game?”

“No. I think we’re long overdue for this talk.” Maddie sits down on Danny’s bed, and Jack picks Danny up again so that they both sit down. Maddie and Jack have Danny helplessly sandwiched between them.

“Honey, we thought the portal was completely defunct,” Maddie says. “We had no idea it even had power actually running to it.”

“You forgot to hit the ‘On’ button,” Danny mumbles, arms crossed.

“... Is that what happened?”

Danny slouches deeper. “Does it matter?”

“Yes, it does. Why did you go inside of it?”

“Were you trying to fix it?” Jack asks. “Please tell us you had your HAZMAT suit on.”

“I did.” And now he has it on forever. “I wasn’t trying to fix it, I was just... curious. I wanted to look inside.”

“I told you we should set security cameras up in there,” Maddie says, glaring at Jack over Danny’s head.

“We can install them now!”

See the full post

867 notes • Posted 2021-10-07 20:05:41 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

[khaleesiofalicante]

All of this is crap, feel free to delete , please !!

_

I have been feeling low, for almost 7 months now, past few month have been very overwhelming for me. I don't know what phase is this but it is getting bit much to handle.

I didn't had much things that gave me happiness but now those things have stopped making me feel good, like I love(d) chocolates , every fibre of my body crave(d) for it and whenever I ate one I used to feel content, it was my comfort food (?) but recently it doesnot make me feel like that anymore. And this same happened with few other things , I found myself thinking about it and this made me sad. I don't know what it means and I don't think I even want to but this sometimes scares me , i don't know why but it does.

There are certain things that i never knew i paid attention to and even remembered that were said to me . I didn't knew recalling them would hurt me even tho they didn't affected me the time they were said or maybe the case is they did but i just repressed the thoughts and feelings. Maybe hearing same things time to time took a permanent place in my brain that can never be abandoned, then the recurring process of flash of memories from beginning to end make it worse.

I 've been from a long time being told to look after my weight and skin. Everytime I meet some close relative even before having a proper greet the first thing I am made aware about is either my weight or how the acne on my face is looking. Like now it has become so normal that everytime someone comments I just say ,"its been happening for a long time" and they too know about it. I do get affected by them saying things but what affects me most is when this thing is pointed out by my family . Yesterday i was laying on bed and my mother came into room and looked at me and said in the best nicest possible way that "why one day your face seems clear and why next day there are so many pimples and spots and whatever". My dad always points this out by saying that please take care of your skin/face i want my daughter to look the most beautiful. I know they want best for me but they 've been saying this for almost half the years of my life i've lived so far ( i am almost 20)  . Still i wait for that day when they'll say you are perfect the way you are , you don't need to change. But I know it won't happen ever. Only if they knew how much it hurts everytime someone points it out, how much I curse my existence at that very moment, how much insecure and worthless and inferior I feel within seconds of time, how much urge I feel to just run away from all this. I know they want good for me but why they feel that being flawless is good. It hurts , sometimes too much.

I have never been one of those who could express things easily , I find it too damn hard to say what I want what i feel .Though I try sometimes but not too hard just a bit because whenever and to whomsoever I tried to even show bare minimum of something either its been talked over or the other person is not able to understand or the other person can't do anything except nod in agreement or I start to feel so anxious that I myself drift away from topic or ...... And I don't blame anyone for this , how can I when I am the one who doesn't try, I just can't.  I don't know what keeps me from saying things outloud but something does.

*deep sigh* :/

-

THANK YOU for reading and SORRY for wasting your time.

Hello, my love.

Thank you for sharing this with me.

I just want to start with something simple - I'm ready to beat the shit out of people who have been ignorant and unkind towards you. So, just keep that in mind.

Alright now.

You remind me a little of Alec, you know? You say you can't express things easily and here you are coherently and patiently explaining something that is troubling you. I see you, little Alec!

If you are having trouble talking to those around you, that's okay. Sometimes it's not that we don't know how to say things, but we get more worried about what would happen if those words leave our mouth. So, we don't talk. We pretend like we don't know how to. Or we tell ourselves that we don't have to. You talk when you feel like it. You express your feelings when you feel ready. There is no rush.

Acne doesn't make a person not beautiful. Gaining weight doesn't make someone not pretty. The funny thing it is very common for women to experience both - especially when they are stressed. So, if someone is making you feel bad about experiencing something like acne and putting on weight, then they are just stupid. They don't understand biology.

A side note that acne and weight gain (along with some other symptoms) are often connected to hormonal imbalances. This is why we notice girls feeling bloated or having pimples when they get their period. It's natural. It's science. There are many women who experience conditions such as POCS which leads to such symptoms too. If there is a medical issue, taking medication does help. If this is something you want to learn more about and understand better, I'm happy to take you through it since it's something I focus on at work.

Every time you remember something someone said about you that wasn't kind just tell yourself their opinion doesn't matter. Because that's all it is. It's just an opinion - one that you didn't even ask for.

As for the chocolate....Sometimes chocolate can increase acne and as we know sweets can contribute to weight gain. Perhaps one of the reasons you don't want to eat it anymore is because somewhere in your mind you believe that you shouldn't eat it anymore.

But fuck that. If it is something that makes you happy, then you are allowed to enjoy it. It's alright if you can't get back to enjoying chocolate right now. You can get there slowly. Until that, find yourself another comfort good. There is so much yummy stuff out there.

Just remember that you are so much more than what other people tell you - cause they don't see everything. They only see what they want to see. They see what they think is important. That is not who you are. Never let them tell you who you are.

Unless it's a doctor, no one is allowed to tell you what you should eat. Unless it's Magnus Bane, no one is allowed to tell you what you should look like or what you should do with your life.

If your parents don't appreciate you for who you are, that says more about them than it does about you. it's something they need to work on. You will find things to be happy about again. You will find things that will make you feel good. We can start trying by diverting your attention a little towards those and less towards those judgemental relatives (who once again I am happy to beat up <3 )

Start small. You could consider doing one thing - just one tiny thing - that makes you feel good every day. Just one thing. And we'll take it from there.

Also, you say you are not trying. You don't want to try. But here you are talking to me about how you feel. You are trying. And I think that's fucking amazing.

You know what I realised after the pandemic? Life is really too fucking short and unpredictable. So, letting judgmental adults and some acne determine who we are and how we should feel is a little scary. Fuck the relatives. Fuck the acne.

You do you.

All my love,

Dani x.

[hoaxsen]

| angst has been coming to me easy now and idk how to feel about that.

| tw; character death, in depth talk of death, mentions of blood and other gruesome parts, season three spoilers.

| word count; 1.8k.

It was all over, spreading like a plague inside the walls upon their arrival. The victory of Wall Maria, along with the near extinction of the Scouts. How many supplies were lost during it? How much destruction was there while it all went down? Does anyone have a true number on how many bodies were being carried back on those flatbed carts after that expedition? 

They were mostly parts of bloodied and mangled things, some weren't even able to be called a body. More like a massive piles of mixed dirt, debris and whatever part of the human body there could be. One hundred and ninety nine people, turned into one enormous jigsaw puzzle that anyone has ever seen. How many carts were used for that, and which cart did this specific body rest upon? 

This body held the features of bright blue eyes, that the captain of the Scouts could sometimes find himself staring into for hours on end. Unknowingly at that. Blonde hair just swept back and kept so neat with its undercut. Sometimes Levi wonders if it was soft to the touch, it doesn't look to be hard, or dirty. Just right, minus those brows. If anything there were times where Levi wanted to trim the blonde bricks of hair off Erwin's face himself. 

Now, days like that will never come. For the sole purpose, of Erwin Smith being deceased. Giving his life up to his stupid cause and dream, this isn't what Levi meant by plundering your dream and lead those crying brats to hell. Was it selfish of him to think that Erwin might come back alive for him? It was, wasn't it? The man having to live through this shit as the leader, making gambles that no one knew how the hell they paid off. Let's not forget about the cadets and soldiers lost along the way in his gambles. A devil among men, though it was Levi wanting to be the one to raise hell right now. Bring a darker hell to the one on this very Earth for the fact that he chose to revive Armin instead of Humanity's Hope. 

Cold, and hardened steel grey hues watched as his body was pulled away, riding alongside on his own horse with this cart. Levi felt only himself at fault, what if he did revive Erwin? Despite the small specks of rocks, falling out and shredded intestines, and lack of life in the blonde's eyes, how would he look taking on the power of the colossal titan? Would he have looked the same as the treacherous Bertholdt, or better? If anything, he'd be alive right now. . .fighting a war once more in this hell. Yes, it was selfish, but Levi Ackerman had his reasons to be selfish in a time like this. Bringing back Erwin instead of Armin wasn't just going to be for humanity, it was also going to be for his own desires. To stop toying with the feelings the ravenette has for the blonde, to stop the daily lies about his ' small crush ' being just a phase. 

The captain never even got to make good on his promise before the commander passed. Wanting so hard and bad to end the Beast Titan, to make him feel the pain Erwin did before his final moments. Hopefully that chance comes back for him some other time. How badly Levi needs it, it'd only be fitting since Erwin gave up his dream for the wall retake to even have happened and succeed. 

For all Levi could do now, was regret and hope that Erwin's funeral would bring him into a small state of piece. Since the ex-commander was already in a permanent state of his own, never to be disturbed. The Ackerman slowly starts to wonder to himself, which kind of suit would really bring out a dead man's eyes? For blue, it had to be a subtle white, right? An ashen grey? Whatever color it was going to be, Levi knew he'd detest it. Knowing it'll be the final suit he sees Erwin in. 

Fast forward a bit to the lowering of the old Scouts' commander into the ground, Levi stayed behind a little ways after the ceremony. Standing before Erwin's grave, a short sigh leaving him as he placed a hand on Erwin's tombstone. 

Erwin Smith 

xxxx - xxxx 

Humanity's Beacon of Hope.

The words Levi read over, and over, and over again. Humanity's Hope, snuffed out a little ways too soon. Levi just had to wake up and face the music, it was bound to happen one day or another. He just wishes that day came a little later than this. Brushing his hand over the words, better now to say this before he keeps it inside for too long. He already regrets not saying this to him when he was alive. 

" How many of these have we attended for our fallen? Now look at you, dumbass. Right there with them, tell Petra I said hi when you see her. " 

His last chance to say this all know, because whatever God out there knows that Levi wouldn't visit Erwin's grave again after this. For the small grudge he'd hold against himself for using the syringe on Armin. 

" I followed you into the fire, made it out with a few scrapes. Though you were burned, still had the guts to carry on more bravely than me. . .even make a choice with that odd line. ' What if there is humanity outside the walls. ' Or some shit like that, and then I realized, and knew. . .that was how you were plundering your dreams and leading those crying brats to hell. " 

Unbeknownst to the captain, he wasn't alone. Just standing from afar, was another grieving heart. Armin Artlet, another soul wanting to say an unspoken peace to their old commander. But ended up seeing Levi there before him. 

" It's not fair you know, Erwin. Or that just might be me being selfish right now, yeah sounds like it. A biased opinion, since I fucking loved you and didn't have the guts to say it. Wanna know why? Cause I'm a coward. Since people I love keep leaving me in ways like this, death. Am I that detestable that death is the only way out? Gotta be, shitty way to go if you ask me, but probably your only way. Call it a curse, I guess. Sadly shit like this happens in the fucked world. I didn't even want to use it on Artlet, but you made your choice. So I had to make mine, fucking bastard. " 

Now that was a surprise to the little eavesdropper in the back, covering his mouth with his hand to not make a sound. Azure eyes bugging out of his head as the captain droned on. Armin himself wasn't even sure why he was saved, wouldn't Erwin have been a better pick? The power of the titan wasted on him, that's how it sounded. On the bright side, the colossal titan was in their arsenal with Eren's titan. Just with the wrong user in Artlet's mind. 

" It's not fair, you asshole. You get your peace, and leave me behind in this hell with a bunch of brats! Yes, they can pull their own weight. But you're not leading them anymore, instead it's gonna be someone else who can't live up to your name. All because I got emotional and saved that runt, when I knew, even with Hanji, that you were the better pick! A massive fuck up on my end, but then a small lived victory right? We have another titan ready to fight for us when needed. But I want you here! It's not fair, you trusted me to do the right thing with that weird liquid, and I don't know if I did! I promised myself that I'd follow you wherever, why did you have to go somewhere I can't go yet?! You and your stupid gambles, well make one with the devil down there and win, come back goddamn it! " 

At this point, Levi was screaming to a grave on the verge of tears. From standing to dropping on his knees, the turned up dirt from a freshly dug hole in the ground was staining his pants. Giving him the feelings of touching the underground floors, though this time he didn't care. Fighting back an attack of tears, his hands digging into the soil and gripping it. Dirt being trapped in his fingernails, a fierce look on his face with a few stray falling tears from his eyes. 

" I promise you, I'll make that sonva bitch pay. Along with aiding in to see that your final goal, your final dream is fulfilled. Even if I have to  die to make that happen. " 

It was a footstep, and the use of sharp senses that brought Levi out of his moment. Spinning around quick as could be, just to be met with a crying, tear stained face of one of his cadets. This was Levi's moment of vulnerability, being seen by Armin as if privacy wasn't a thing. Though now, the man couldn't hold it against the boy, dusting off himself to be free of the dirt and grime. Levi sent Armin a small glare, no words have been spoken yet, and not one really knew what to say. 

" Captain . . . I'm sorry, but you should have us--. " 

" Can it brat, I dunno how much you heard, and I hate repeating myself. But I'll make an exception, Erwin made his choice. I acted on it, now you might have to step up to bat. " 

Levi's words drew a small gasp from Armin, making him want to roll his eyes. 

" No one can live up to be Erwin, but I trust that you know what you're doing. Don't make me regret saving you now. " 

" Y-Yes sir! But can I ask a question? " 

That made a brow raise on Levi's face, a sign for Armin to carry on with what he was saying. The boy had to take a deep breath to even get the first word out. It almost made Levi scoff at a time like this. 

" Y-You l-love Commander Erwin, sir? Is-Is that true? " 

The stuttering fool really had the balls to ask. The captain almost looked impressed, but at the same time angered somewhat. 

" Yeah, I loved him, Artlet. A main factor playing on in why I wanted to use the syringe on him. But something happened during it, like I said. Don't make me regret it. " 

All he got was a frantic nod from the other blonde, even a salute for some reason. Levi responded with his own nod back, figuring now that his time alone with Erwin was up. Looking behind him at that grave, he sighed, his eyes narrowing somewhat. 

' Don't worry, Erwin. You won't be along for long, I said I'd follow you right? Into that same fire I'll soon be going. ' 

He whispered out, making his way to leave now. Going as far as to pat a startled Armin on the shoulder. His own line echoing inside his head to help cope with this, just tweaked a bit this time. 

' Plunder all your dreams, and lead those crying brats to victory. In his name. ' 

[ehbunnehsblog]

So someone made this post I thought was really cool and I wanted to answer it the person who made the post goes by @buh-beep so please go give that post a like and follow them with all that said here are the questions

1. What is the oldest doll you own?

Probably my Beautiful Crissy doll from 1968 although that may not be the date for that exact doll she is pretty old. She was made by the company ideal.

2. What is the doll you got most recently?

My Bratz Collecters Yasmin from 2018 by MGA. When I lived with my mom she bought her for me I think she gave me a card and we got it. I don't have her or any of these dolls anymore since I don't live with my mother for personal reasons.

3. Favorite Type of Doll?

Hands down Bratz. They have been my absolute fave since I was a little girl and i still love them their fashion, makeup just everything really is iconic and I really believe that they might have the same impact as Barbie once I get older. Now if we talk about favorite lines? That will have to be for another time.

4. Least Favorite Type of Doll?

Pinkie Cooper. It's cute I had one but I was just not interested in the dolls sadly I definitely think it was an interesting idea though and its probably perfect for some people I just never knew where she would fit in with my other dolls. Also when I saw my cousin and his ex they had stuff for me and for some reason I could only take two things home and my mom sorta had me take her home when I could have had a Hannah Montana doll so rip :p

5. How many dolls do you own?

Zero now rip but honestly idk. I had mostly Bratz and sorta collected but now I might genuinely try to collect them.

6. What is a doll you had and wish you still did?

Tan Bratz Passion 4 Fashion Cloe. I still really wish I kept her but I was going through this dumb phase where I just stopped caring about my dolls and we had this science project in school and I did mine on hair dye and dyed her hair using some fruit or something and gave her away. If anyone knows where I can get her (hopefully for cheap) please tell me I really loved her she was also one of my friends absolute favorites.

7. What does your wish list look like?

A lotta Bratz mostly but that would be a very long list so to save you the details two of the series I want are the Tokyo a Gogo dolls, Formal Funk and Flashback Fever.

8. Prettiest Doll you Own?

Honestly have no clue all of them are gorgeous but I think one of my prettiest is definitely Rock Angelz Sasha I would love to own more Sasha dolls shes so gorgeous.

9. Ugliest Doll you own but love anyways?

I don't think I own any ugly ones really just ones that had messed up hair so I don't really have anything to add here. Actually hmm maybe my first edition Cameron and Dylan Bratz dolls they are still cool though.

10. Cutest Doll you own?

Either my Barbie Peek a Boos or my Mindy Mint Chocolate Chip Yummyland doll. I love Bratz but I really wish I saw more cutesy but fashionable dolls I believe they should bring back Yummyland dolls they smell so dang good and because kids love slim maybe they could add a small bottle (in a shape of a drink) that smells nice too? Idk lol.

11. Biggest Doll you own?

A Barbie doll that is I believe 28" in size after that I would say my Beautiful Crissy Doll and than my Yummyland doll.

12. Smallest doll you own?

All of my Barbie Peekaboos and Polly Pockets. Since Polly came back I think Mattel has the perfect chance to bring back Barbie Peek a Boos. They are pretty small so I kept them in a basket I am used to the size of Bratz I find them easier to hold over Barbie Peek a Boos or Polly's.

13. What doll in your collection is worth most?

Hmm probably Beautiful Crissy tbh I wanted her because when i was in grade 8 i watched these old vintage commercials on YouTube and i saw her and i just thought she was one of the most gorgeous dolls. I don't have her now because again shes at my moms but I don't think I could sell her shes just really cute and I think dolls from that time and older are special and tell a story and show a different time.

14. Doll you will never buy and why?

Lamilly and American Girls. I know these dolls especially American Girls are very popular for a lot of people but I am not really into dolls that are supposed to be like me I like fashion dolls mostly or really cutesy dolls. I think American Dolls are pretty iconic in their own way but I just can't see me owning one and for Lamilly same deal I feel like its trying to put down other dolls and make Lamilly seem superior and I just don't dig it. I don't like Barbie's a whole lot but I dislike like Lamilly I think it's a good message but it just feels meh? Idk other dolls I will never own are Blythe's I have this thing with dolls with eyes like that and I think it would probably spook me a bit.

15. Strangest doll you own?

Pinkie Cooper hands down. Again she just doesn't fit anywhere and shes so odd and really stands out from the others not that that's always a bad thing but as someone who is mostly into Bratz, Monster High and Ever After High she just doesn't go anywhere although she would probably fit in maybe with the EAH dolls. Another is probably the big Barbie like I didn't want her I just got her as a Christmas present one year and yeah that's that.

16. Biggest Doll Related Regret?

Giving away that Cloe doll I will always regret that also almost wanting to sell my Bratz and not bringing my dolls with me when I left my moms and went to my dads. Also I just wanna say my dad is the coolest and one day we had a nice convo about toys and stuff it was pretty rad.

17. What's the most important aspect of a doll in your opinion?

I just want to say I absolutely love this question this is the main reason why I wanted to make this post. I believe the most important aspect is if the owner finds joy in that doll because if you don't we wouldn't have so many people collecting dolls and dolls wouldn't be sold. I think dolls are very important and can build up good skills. Another important aspect is if you can pose the doll and depending on if it's a fashion dolls is if it has good clothes and good fabric all of these are so important but as long as people find joy that's the most important.

18. What's your doll related pet peeve

People are gonna hate this and I apologize but I find it difficult to watch or look at people changing the dolls like not in clothes changing but repaints it's cool and some of them are absolutely gorgeous but sometimes I have a bit of a pet peeve of them mostly because I am so worried that I will never find those dolls because people use them and repaint them. Their aren't many Bratz repaints though so I don't get bothered too much and when they do repaints they make the faces so pretty and I would love for MGA to use some of the screenings some of these people use because they look so good.

19. When did you start collecting dolls?

This might be an odd opinion but I think that anyone can be a doll collector even if they don't mean to be like for me I don't call myself a doll collector but I sorta am? Even though I never meant to be but now I do want to collect but it started with Bratz when I was young but now I want to take it a bit more seriously.

20. Have any doll related stories?

Well I never first fought anyone I was way too young lol but I do have two good stories number 1 is on Christmas a few years back my grandparents before they both passed bought me a Holiday Yasmin doll from 2007 don't know how they found it but they did and I loved that doll but again at my moms rip another one is one Christmas I got two of the same Bratz Cade dolls and for the longest time I thought it was Dylan because the doll looked exactly like Dylan does in the movies and shows lol! I might go into more stories on my dolls because there are a few that I really like.

With all of these questions answered I will once again ask people who see this to go like and follow @buh-beep who made the original post. This was intended for doll collectors I believe personally I don't call myself a collector but as someone who loves dolls I thought this would be fun and it really was if anyone wants to this I suggest it. Its really fun and I like sharing this stuff with you guys.

☆With all that said I hope you liked this post. Please give me a follow i post a lot of stuff like this☆