#(for context this was in regards to tags on a post on where you keep your medication)
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your flatmate eats ibuprofen???? like that’s not good lol maybe they should stop doing that before they destroy their kidneys or get heart attack/stroke
sldkfjsd oh no, yeah, not like that XD it was something of a flippant overexaggreation in the tags because it's kinda funny to me that he's the main reason i even keep it (=i keep forgetting i have it/can take pain medication when i need it lmao) but flatmate has debilitating migraines sometimes and is forgetful in regards to restocking on stuff. So he comes by sometimes and asks if i can help out :)
(i hope this makes somewhat sense, my brain doesnt seem to want to make proper sentences today)
#i would have answered this privately but the button doesnt let me anymore????#did tumblr change that or is it just misbehaving for me#how rude#also i think the 'eating' was something of a joke-germanism i sometimes use and gave off the wrong impression#(for context this was in regards to tags on a post on where you keep your medication)#i mainly have meds and stuff in my room so i can keep track of them#also it's not like this is a regular occurence. maybe every few months#that being said idk how much he needs it outside of coming to me#but he hasnt built up a tolerance afaik so it should be ok
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wait, i don't understand, can u please if u want explain why they scrapped the "Stolitz Montage" song?
Yeah, I can explain! I actually have a lot of thoughts about these songs.
For context, at the beginning of Sinsmas, a song called Day By Day plays in the background while Blitz and Stolas run errands. Originally, a different song (untitled, so Sam Haft—the composer—unofficially called it Stolitz Montage) was going to play during these scenes, but they ended up scrapping it. I mentioned in the tags of a different post that I understood why they'd made this decision.
If you don't want to keep reading, my TL;DR is that I believe the tone and mood of Stolitz Montage doesn't fit Stolas' emotional journey in Sinsmas as well as Day By Day does.
If you do want to read my full personal analysis, keep reading below the cut!
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(Note: I'm going to focus on the songs' lyrics, because I'm not knowledgeable enough about music to analyse the musical aspect of the songs. If anyone else wants to add their thoughts in that regard, be my guest!)
Let's start by taking a look at the lyrics of the scrapped song, Stolitz Montage:
youtube
So you're having a bad time
You're stressing and everything all seems much so
You've been having a sad time
And your family probably hates your fucking guts so
The song starts by describing Stolas' situation and emotional state in the days following the trial: he is sad and overwhelmed, everything feels like "too much", and his family probably hates him.
It's pretty clear from the get-go that they wanted a song for this montage that conveyed Stolas' struggle to adapt to life as a commoner, away from everything he's known, and having gone cold turkey on his depression meds (the lack of which is emphasised visually throughout the song).
The song is also in second person: Stolas isn't him, or me, he's you. This is something both songs have in common. It keeps the song at a slight emotional distance from Stolas. Whereas a first-person song would make the feelings too personal—would make Stolas too aware of his own struggle—and a third-person song wound be too distant, the second person allows Stolas to be only passively aware of his emotional state. He's not the one singing; he's the one being sung about. What he's feeling is being pointed out to him by an external, seemingly omniscient voice.
The song continues:
Ooooh-oh oooh ooh
I know you feel it too
You lost your way
And just can't fake it for another day
It's hard to take it
Just pretend you're gonna be okay
Here is where I think the tone of the song starts to deviate from what they wanted to convey in this montage.
At first glance, this is a continuation of the previous verses, and mostly expands on Stolas' emotional state: "it's hard to take it"; "you lost your way".
The key difference is that the lyrical voice now plays an actual role in that emotional state.
First, it states that it shares Stolas' feelings ("I know you feel it too"—implying that Stolas isn't the only one who feels this way). Thus, the lyrical voice starts shifting into an active character within the scene. And not any kind of character—one that can relate to Stolas and, more importantly, one that can offer some comfort.
Then, there's the line "just pretend you're gonna be okay". Now, I see two possible interpretations for this line. It can either be a piece of advice for Stolas (hey, I know it's hard, but just pretend), or another description of his struggle, a continuation of the previous line: "(it's hard to) just pretend you're gonna be okay". Personally, I lean slightly towards the former interpretation, especially because the lyrical voice's intention to offer comfort and advice becomes clearer in the next line of the song:
You're not okay and that's okay
This is where the focus of the song shifts fully towards a hopeful, even optimistic view of Stolas' situation.
Now, I get where they were going with this. "It's okay to not be okay" is a very powerful thing to say to someone who's struggling with mental illness and hard life circumstances, and it's one Stolas badly needs to hear.
In fact, it is a message that is conveyed to Stolas multiple times throughout the episode. By Blitz. Not through words, of course—but through actions. In the montage itself, as well as throughout the rest of the episode, Blitz constantly stands by Stolas' side, offers him company and comfort, meets him where he's at emotionally, doesn't pressure him to be okay, and (especially at the end in their apartment) gives room for Stolas' sadness and grief to exist. He hugs Stolas, puts his hands on Stolas' arms, and opens up emotionally about his own sister, and those are all ways of showing Stolas that it's okay that Stolas isn't okay.
But here's the thing. The knowledge that it's okay to not be okay is Blitz's, not Stolas'. That is Blitz's emotional state, not Stolas'. Stolas doesn't know it's okay to not be okay, and even though Blitz keeps conveying this message to him, he's not able to hear it just yet. Not this early in his descent to rock bottom.
In fact, learning that it's okay to not be okay is a journey that Stolas only begins at the end of the episode. By then, Stolas still isn't okay, but he begins to come to terms with the fact that that's alright. And he does this by allowing Blitz to sit in silence with him, to dance with him, to pry a laugh from him, to hold him without any expectations of being held back. The final scene of the episode is all about them both being okay even though Stolas isn't. We see this in the fact that Stolas lets himself stay in Blitz's arms, going as far as closing his eyes. He's there. He's finally in the moment. He's finally allowing the "not okay" feelings in his body to just be.
The Stolitz Montage song ends with:
You put one foot in front of the other
Then you take it day by day
Knowing you got nothing
You still got each other
Ooooh-oh oooh ooh
Again, most of these lines do match Stolas' emotional state. In fact, the notion of just living life one day at a time, just focusing on putting one foot in front of the other, is very representative of what a depressive episode can and does feel like.
But, in the very last line, the song shifts right back to a reassuring tone: "you still got each other".
Now, not only does the hopeful, optimistic sentiment of this line belong—once again—to Blitz's emotional state, it also goes directly against what the emotional arc of the episode aims to achieve.
Sinsmas isn't about them having each other—Sinsmas is about Stolas having Blitz.
It takes him all episode to realise this, too. At the beginning, when the montage takes place, Stolas is just going through the motions. As stated above, he's just focusing on putting one foot in front of the other—he's fully on survival mode. During the fight with Andrealphus, Stolas is shocked that Blitz came to save him, that he risked his life. That is the moment Stolas begins to truly comprehend that he can lean on Blitz. And then, after they get home, he slowly continues to learn it, as explained above. By the end of the episode, he's only just starting to allow himself to lean emotionally on Blitz.
And significantly, Blitz doesn't lean on Stolas. Because he's at a very different part of his own character arc, and he already had his opportunity to lean emotionally on those around him with Millie in Ghostfuckers, and to a lesser extent, with all his employees during their mission on Sinsmas.
Blitz has gone through enough pain, character growth, and healing to both understand exactly where Stolas is at, and be able to meet him there and be a rock for Stolas to lean on.
So the reason that line—that last line, positioned strategically to drive home its message that it's all gonna be okay—doesn't work for the montage is twofold. Firstly, because Stolas isn't ready to see that he has Blitz. Secondly, because it is now Blitz's turn to give comfort without needing to receive it in exchange.
And, if we take a look at the whole song, the reason it doesn't work for the scene is because it doesn't meet Stolas where he's at. The song says, "yes, you're sad, but—" and shifts to optimism. It doesn't fully allow Stolas to simply not be okay. To not be there yet. It doesn't fully allow his depression to just suck. The feelings of sadness and overwhelmingness are shadowed by a positivity and hope that belong to Blitz, and not Stolas.
Let's now take a look at Day By Day, and at which ideas from the original song were kept, which ones were changed, how, and why it works:
youtube
Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh
You take it day by day
You got everything that you had thought you wanted
But you still feel so blue
And you don't know what to do
Right off the bat, the lyrics are very similar in tone to the ones at the beginning of Stolitz Montage. Once again, a lyrical voice in the second person describes Stolas' emotional state: he's blue (sad), he's taking it day by day.
But there's already a change. "You have everything you thought you wanted, but you still feel so blue".
The fact that Stolas had always wanted a life with Blitz is something the previous song doesn't touch on whatsoever. And it matters, because "what Stolas thought he wanted" is a central part of his arc in the episode. It comes back during his breakdown at the office: "and I did it for what?! These stupid, foolish fantasies?" And it comes back again when Blitz saves him from Andrealphus, and when Blitz dances with him and their eyes meet afterwards.
As stated above, this is the episode where it dawns on Stolas that he has Blitz. But he isn't there yet at the beginning of the episode, and so he still believes what he and Blitz had was just a fantasy of his. And because he's never had anything with Blitz that wasn't a fantasy, because fantasy is all he knows, he doesn't immediately know what to do with the real thing. With the domesticity, and the errands. He doesn't recognise the signs Blitz is sending his way that he's got Blitz to lean on.
These two lines are also important because they bring forth another aspect of depression that the previous song doesn't: that love doesn't cure depression, or make it magically go away. That going cold turkey on your meds and having a massive depressive episode is going to suck no matter how many good things you have in this life, because depression is a biological process, not a state of mind. Depression takes away your ability to find joy in things that used to bring you it. It takes away your feelings, your energy, your strength.
Notice that Stolas doesn't seem apathetic or hollow inside on the night of the trial and the morning after. Yes, he's had his title and power stripped, he's been physically assaulted in the street, and yes, he's worried about Octavia. Obviously, he shows signs of being dissociated, and he's exhausted. But, emotionally, he's still hanging on. He still thanks Blitz for everything, and he talks to Blitz in the morning, and smiles when Blitz offers to get him rats. Before the effects of going cold turkey on his meds start to kick in, he's grateful to be around Blitz.
It's during the montage, as the days go by, that he starts feeling blue. Because depression is very quickly taking away the joy he found in Blitz's company.
And that's why, even in the first few lines, this song conveys Stolas' state of mind so much better than the previous one. Because while the message in Stolitz Montage was "yes, you're sad, but—", the message in Day By Day is "yes, you should be happy, but."
It lets the sad win over the happy. It lets depression take Stolas down with it, it lets him feel helpless and lost. "You still feel so blue, and you don't know what to do."
The song continues:
You're sitting at the end of the rainbow, but the pain grows
And you can't help let the strain show
'Cause what else are you to do?
These lines emphasise the ideas presented in the previous ones: that Stolas should be happy, but he isn't. That the pain that has planted itself in Stolas is growing. So much so that he can't help but let it show.
Stolas' helplessness, his slow descent into misery, are given the room to exist. Everything around him seems fine, but he's not fine. And he's not told that it's okay to not be fine. Because this is Stolas' emotional state we're exploring, and for him, it's not okay to not be fine right now. He's too busy going through the motions to grant himself that kind of mercy.
The song finishes:
Keep it calm, life goes on, and on, and on
Nothing's wrong, nothing's wrong
So why do I still feel this way?
Ooh, ooh-ooh, ooh, ooh-ooh
You take it day by day
And, much like in the previous song, we get a small hint of what could be interpreted either as advice/reassurance from the lyrical voice, or as Stolas actively telling himself to pretend to be okay. "keep it calm, life goes on, nothing's wrong". In this case, though, I lean towards the latter interpretation for a very simple reason: the next line shifts to first person. "So why do I still feel this way?"
And that's the thing: once again, the hope and calm he's trying to make himself feel are immediately overpowered by his feelings of sadness. Once again, it's the sadness that wins over, and not the happiness. His depression is given room to drag him down, take him slowly towards rock bottom.
And once again, the last line—at least the last one before the chorus is repeated—is used to drive home the message of the song. But this time, the message is that, despite it all, despite having what he wanted, despite sitting at the end of the rainbow, despite trying to convince himself he's okay, he still feels sad. Because that's what depression does. No matter how many good things you have in your life, it drags you down.
And that message, in that last line, is delivered in the form of a question. "Why do I still feel this way?" This matters for two reasons. The first one is that it shows that Stolas isn't (fully) aware of what's happening to him. He obviously knows he needs his meds, he knows he should be taking them. We see him reach out for them. But he is also living his emotions, and not just experiencing them from the outside. And as the emotions take over, he loses perspective of where they come from, too caught up in how they're drowning him.
The second reason this matters is because the song and the lyrical voice don't offer Stolas answers.
In Stolitz Montage, Stolas gets an answer to his struggle: that, ultimately, [Blitz and Stolas] still got each other.
But in Day By Day, all Stolas gets are questions. What else are you to do? Why do I still feel this way?
Day By Day meets Stolas where he's at during the days leading up to Sinsmas after the trial. It allows for these questions to exist without an answer; it lets the answers come later in the episode. It lets his journey through the episode play out, allowing him to learn that he has Blitz, that he needs his meds, and that he has to be okay with the fact that things are not okay.
By the end of the episode, he can acknowledge that he made his choices and has to deal with the consequences. He starts to understand Blitz is by his side, willing to help him through this. That his relationship with Blitz might not feel like he thought it would, because he's too mentally ill and heart-broken to be there—but that they still have each other, they still love each other, and they'll be okay.
But during the montage, he's not there yet, and it wouldn't make sense for the song to be there, either.
So, yes, as cute and optimistic as Stolitz Montage is, and as glad as I am they released it anyways for us to enjoy, I believe the writers made the right decision by scrapping it for the episode.
If you read this far, thank you for your time! Please treat yourself to a glass of water for me, and feel free to share your thoughts ❤️
#helluva boss#helluva boss meta#helluva boss sinsmas#stolitz#Blitzwhore meta#This post took so long to write but I'm so proud of it#stolas helluva boss#Depression tw
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607. I MISS YOU.
" And I found photographs of our school, on the day we met I thought that you were so beautiful, it was love, I guess."
VIOLINIST AU MASTERLIST
It's here!! The official lore-filled post for the Violinist AU that my wonderful anons, @shalomniscient's godly input and I have concocted over the past three months. This masterlist will serve as guidelines for the AU so that newcomers and current enjoyers (me included lol) can easily refer to it and see if any burning questions have already been answered or not. Speaking of, every anon questions and rambles can currently be found under the #violinist au tag. Things will inevitably be added as time goes by, so I'll do my best to update this post when they do. Let's get into it! ♫
SOME BASICS!
SUMMARY ♫
╰┈➤ Kafka and Reader are classical musicians and childhood best friends who have been playing together since their respective instructors discovered their potential and made them work together on a piece at just 8 years old. At the time, they are both young prodigies in the making who share a dream of becoming the best in their field. They navigate the carefreeness of childhood, heavy expectations, close friendships and tumultuous high school years hand in hand. As they grow, so does their music. The two are intrinsically tangled up; where there is one, you can surely find the other. One day, when they're around 16 years old, R moves away. Their last bus ride together is a memory Kafka holds close to her heart and she remembers it viscerally whenever comes the time to bring an especially complex composition to life. This musical prowess eventually becomes the source of her recognition and success.
After R moves away, Kafka loses herself in her ambitions and Elio's strict teaching. He continues to groom her into the perfect musician and has little regard for her self-destructive behavior if the results surpass his expectations. She isolates herself from her friends, practices until her fingers ache, and spends a long time exteriorizing her feelings of abandonment through her music. She’s snarky, irritable and mean. She grows up to play the violin professionally and is recognized as a prodigy in that world. She goes through pianist accompaniment after pianist accompaniment, always looking for the “missing key” to her art that’s disappeared alongside R, but it remains unattainable.
R grows up insecure due to Elio’s hurtful favouritism towards Kafka; they never feel skilled enough to keep up with her, strong enough to shoulder their instructor’s expectations for them and thus worthy of Kafka’s attention and respect. When they move, they stop playing the piano for a while. Even they pick it back up eventually, it’s never in a professional context. While KFR have different relationships with music, since they’ve learned it as a duo, they understand each other’s art like no one else. R now makes records of songs covers that they’ve only recently started selling due to their popularity among the locals. It’s a hobby, not a career.
PRESENTING... KFR ♫
╰┈➤ KAFKA
We all know her, we all adore her, forever a superstar... Kafka's as close to HSR's canon as I could make her. Since this is an AU, there are obviously backstory/character traits that I've added to further flesh her out but the base of her character remains the same. Classical music is her life and she's played professionally as soon as she could; praised and admired almost all of her life (by her instructor and her fellows), she's a goddess with the violin. She's playful, confident with the skills to back it up, and guards her true feelings behind easy smiles only the ones closest to her can pick apart.
Some Kafka facts:
She's most definitely a media sweetheart. Her practiced elegance and distinct fashion style make her look very Cool, and it's an image she's carefully built brick by brick!
She lives in a condo with minimalist design, so it looks pretty empty despite her collections of records, musical instruments and mini libraries filled with books, music sheets and the likes. You can find an intricate, pretty vase in almost every room.
Outside of music, she doesn't do commitment. She sucks at it, hates feeling "hindered" and is often preoccupied by someone something else anyway. Hookups and FWB are more her style. She’s had like one serious relationship up until the present time.
As a teen, she was pretty rebellious. Though rigorous when it comes to the violin, she was never above skipping a day or two of class to have some fun and almost always dragged R along whether they thought it was a good idea or not. As an adult, she still enjoys the thrill but is much more calculated due to being under the spotlight most days.
She’s always heard humming! Though singing’s not her thing, she’s constantly humming her favourite orchestras, pieces she’s currently learning or just songs that she likes.
Heavy smoker, especially when she’s feeling some type of way.
She has no living relatives.
She harbours some repressed anger that she’s never fully healed from until the present time. That explains a lot of her defense mechanisms and current guarded behaviour.
She wears her sunglasses when she wants to hide.
Her closest relationships are: Blade, Acheron and Black Swan.
She meets Blade sometime after college and offers him a job as her personal driver. He understands her needs implicitly and she deciphers his moods just as easily. He’s the one who takes care of her when she drinks too much or needs to clear her head with a long drive. Sometimes, shared silence is enough. Kafka and Acheswan have been friends since high school and have stayed friends throughout adulthood. The three of them grew closer right after R moved away.
╰┈➤ Reader
Because this is still an x reader AU, they don’t have a specific appearance. All of their specificities lie in their character. R is an excellent pianist despite their traitorous mind convincing them otherwise, they genuinely have a passion for the piano and classical music as a whole so they’re very knowledgeable when it comes to it. They currently work at a record store alongside Serval and make music for themselves that others happen to enjoy. They’re an overthinker and tend to diminish the place they take up in people’s lives but they’re also very sweet, reserved and thoughtful.
Some R facts:
They’re a terrible liar. It’ll show on their face whenever they’re bothered by something, or they’ll have little tells like fidgeting or avoiding eye contact.
Funnily enough, they were the most direct one out of the two as teens. R had no issue calling Kafka beautiful on concert night or holding her hand unprompted as they walked to the bus stop. While she hid behind shitty humour and sarcasm, they were more open in their affection. It’s a little more complicated in the present time, as they have to relearn each other with their respective baggage.
Elio's berating is the reason why R starts hiding things from Kafka and their other friends. As a teen they keep more secrets from her than she thinks, it's something she'll come to realize in the present time.
R moves away for a couple of reasons; their parents consider moving due to having to take care of chronically ill relatives but that decision isn't cemented until R tells them that they're okay with it. By the time they make this decision they've let their dwindling passion for the piano, years of Elio's expectations and their own insecurities take up so much space in their mind that they simply don't believe they're needed anymore. They couldn't do it anymore, look at Kafka and be reminded of how insignificant they were. They don't inform her simply out of cowardice. At 16 they were going through so much that they just believed leaving was for the best.
They have a little sister! She's 14 years younger than they are, so she was 2 when their family moved away. In the present time she's 14!
R sings! Not professionally or anything, but their singing voice is (one of) someone's favourite sounds.
They live in the one bedroom apartment right above the record store. It's cozy and seems packed at first glance, complete opposite from Kafka's home. There are music sheets and drawings from when their sister was younger on the fridge, pictures framed on the walls, old posters of bands they still love in their bedroom, etc.
Their closest relations are: Serval, Acheron and Swan
Serval and R met at the record store, where she already worked at before they were employed there. R is often invited to her band's performances, and they grew close from working together so often (outside of the owner, they're the only two employees in the store.) They're here for each other as they both go through these ridiculous homoromantic situationships... Acheswan are high school friends and once KFR reconnects, so do R and our fav purple ladies. They're closest to Acheron.
TIMELINE ♫
╰┈➤ KFR are the same age and meet at 8 years old. They grow together under the same instructor, Elio. They go to the same school and don't live that far off from each other, only one bus ride away.
At 14 years old, in high school, KFR befriend Acheron and Black Swan who have just started dating. They're high school sweethearts!
At 16 years old, the Bus Breakup happens and R moves away. Kafka's left to finish the rest of the school year with Acheswan and throws herself into her music/goals to cope with R's sudden absence.
Kafka starts to get recognition in the classical music world in college, but more so in the years that follow. At 23, she's already pretty known as a violinist prodigy. Also the year she meets Bladie!
Around a decade after they last saw each other, at 28 years old, KFR meets again in the vintage record store R works at. When I say "present time" I'm referring to their first meeting and on.
KFR officially get together about a year later, at 29 years old.
SOME FUN STUFF!
DRABBLES
╰┈➤ I've written a few short drabbles for specific moments of KFR's lives together that particularly spoke to me. I intend to write more whenever I feel inspired, and you're all welcome to pitch in as well !
🎼 Bus Breakup
🎼 Record Store Shitshow
🎼 Random KFR drabble
HEADCANONS ♫
(more like fun facts since I decide what's canon...)
╰┈➤ These aren't in chronological order because that would take me an insane amount of time to figure out. As always, if anyone wants me to elaborate on any of these they can always send me an ask :)
R has natural perfect pitch while Kafka's worked hard to hone hers. In the present time, she’s much better than they are due to playing consistently and professionally.
Kafka picked up smoking in college to alleviate her stress. Very bad habit that she can’t seem to stop.
Kafka has tattoos! I don’t care, she at least has a spine tattoo. Her and R probably get matching ones at some point, much smaller though. I’m thinking particular music notes.
R eventually comes to own the record store they work at.
Kafka’s very close with R’s family. They hang out without R often. Their sister loves her and they've had a few spa days.
R’s dog tag is from a grandparent that passed away. It’s sort of a way for them to remember to keep their loved ones close. I can see Kaf gifting them one with a date engraved on the back.
Kafka’s tried her hand at composition but the one she’s been working on and off on for years is still unfinished.
Once KFR gets together, they're always touching in some way. One of them toying with the other's fingers is a common occurrence.
R still has the drawing their 8 year old self made with Kafka somewhere in their teenage bedroom. They've also held on some specific annotated music sheets/partitions that they've worked on with Kafka when they were in the school orchestra.
Kafka and Serval have a funny relationship; Serval loves to get on Kafka's nerves because she's a rich snob and Kafka's always a fan of getting even. The passive aggressiveness between them is off the charts, but they can also be found giggling together when drunk. They'll deny it wholeheartedly.
R and Himeko are friends! They go to the same coffee place almost every day and see each other often but work in very different fields.
Serval and Cocolia have something weird going on. They've been friends who kiss sometimes since college and now they have different career paths that add some distance between them but they still want each other but Cocolia tends to prioritize her work and Serval feels she doesn't care as much anymore and--- it's complicated. Bronya doesn't exist at this point in the AU, but she likely will in the future.
R's followed some of Kafka's success on social media for a few years before they met again. Kafka has a little fanbase!
R sells their personal collection of the records they make at the store. When Kafka gets wind of it, she makes sure to have a copy of each (mostly by having Blade buy them from people’s hands…) and keeps the records at home. That’s before they get together.
R plays the piano for Kafka for the time the morning after they sleep together hehehe.
R confesses to Kafka about Elio's mistreatment after Swan convinces them to. I would say it’s the biggest chance Kafka has to make them understand that she wants them at her side.
Swan was the pretty but kinda weird girl in high school who was very into palm reading and tarot cards. Acheron was probably on the track team or something. Super sweet but reserved.
Kafka and Acheswan see each other pretty often. They have brunch.
Acheron studied philosophy in college.
Acheron mostly taught Kafka how to do her makeup as teens.
Swan has always been able to see through Kafka's bullshit and defense mechanisms.
When they were in high school, R’s house was the designated hang out spot for the 4 of them. At school they had classroom 311B which was often vacant so they hung out there most of the time.
KFR's confession happens in R's teenage bedroom after a family dinner. Sev and I already have the whole thing planned out...
Their bus number, 607, means “I miss you” in pager code! I thought I was being clever when I chose it lol. It’s kind of the official title me thinks.
CONTRIBUTIONS!
╰┈➤ KFR PLAYLIST MADE BY @blinkinn <3
Very grateful and giddy about this one because I still can’t believe my brainrot has inspired someone to make a playlist out of it. It’s full of angst, as it should be, so I’m very happy. I’m still adding on songs that make me think of them and have some instrumentals/violin sonatas that I need to add as well, and I'm always taking anon suggestions for songs y'all think would fit them <3
╰┈➤ KFR PINTEREST BOARD
This pinterest board is unfinished but is essentially meant to be a progression of KFR’s childhood to adulthood. It was supposed to start off representing childhood carefreeness and nostalgia then progresses into their angsty teenage years, their separate lives, all to come back to the time they meet again well into adulthood. However, the board is structured from most recent to older years, so the oldest memories are at the bottom.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/511bbd1218c820bff339e584c30cef28/b94b5db21739e196-05/s1280x1920/77c88fa1838b2f6392acdcab9ab09a934abbef0e.jpg)
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/eb3cf3b4a07f78b879a5a455f1284fd3/b94b5db21739e196-2b/s1280x1920/9a932a9bfbc5199d1c4e3a16cf7b4ad54212e1bb.jpg)
Thank you to all my anons and Sev for brainrotting with me, this AU is getting kind of big now and I’m really happy about it. I’ll add more info to this post periodically, I think about it often and I’ve likely forgotten some stuff that has been mentioned to me before so it’s a work in progress!!! Hope more people enjoy what we’ve all made together <3
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!!!!! Tw: faked suicide not by Steve or Eddie. There are ⚠️⚠️⚠️ before and after the most graphic parts which can be skipped without needing too much context. I tried to be vague but it can still be triggering. !!!!! (Thank you everyone tagging it as such)
A sort of different type of TikTok Modern AU…
Eddie Munson is a famous rockstar and honestly doesn’t post much on TikTok, but he occasionally finds himself scrolling though the app which is how he finds Steve.
He’s gorgeous. Exactly Eddie’s type with luscious, gravity defying hair, a sharp jaw, pretty lips, and he bets if he had a closer look, Steve would have the most charming eyes. It’s a shame the camera is so far away from him, and Eddie almost wonders why until Billy Hargrove is in the shot.
Eddie’s stomach sours at the sight of the man. Yes, he’s attractive, even Eddie could admit that, but there was something about him that made Eddie feel uncomfortable. Plus, there were a few scandals surrounding the tiktoker regarding previous racist Tweets and comments which he has responded to with a thrust trap to “Nobody’s Perfect” by Miley Cyrus / Hannah Montana.
So yeah. Eddie didn’t particularly like him and the stuff he got away with just because he’s hot.
He tunes back into the video which has him holding his finger to his lips, and Eddie is already rolling his eyes. The caption says, “Pranking my boyfriend, Steve 🤣😱” and Eddie can already tell it has to be fake with all the dramatics that Steve just happens to not see.
But then Billy carefully sneaks behind the couch where Steve is sitting and dumps a bucket full of water and ice onto him which has the man yelling and standing up in shock. He stands still for a minute and then yells, “Why the fuck would you do that, Billy??”
The tone and overall reaction has Eddie actually wonder if the video is fake or if Steve is just a really good actor. But he watches it again and notices that the man doesn’t look toward the camera once and something about that makes him feel really uneasy.
Eddie has to reason with himself, if the man is dating Billy Hargrove then he must not be a great person, and maybe he deserved the bucket of ice water. But Eddie still closes out of the app and tries his best not to think about it.
-:-:-:-:-:-
He opens the app a few days later, having forgotten about the whole incident until he comes across another video by Billy and the word “prank” in his caption catches Eddie’s eye. He sighs wondering why it’s on his for you page, but right before he swipes past it, he catches the gist of the prank.
Billy fills a syringe with mayonnaise and injects it into a donut, and then it cuts to him giving it to Steve from a camera that once again seems to be hidden although Billy keeps glancing at it with a smirk on his face and evil in his eyes. Steve, on the other hand, doesn’t glance toward the camera, but his face lights up with glee when he’s handed the donut. “You got this for me?” He asks in an awe filled tone as if the donut means the world to him.
“Yeah, why don’t you take a big ol’ bite of it for me?” Billy asks, voice low. Eddie watches as Steve shifts uncomfortably and puts the donut down.
“This isn’t another prank, is it? You know I don’t like them,” Steve says which honestly surprises Eddie. His tone is entirely genuine, and he feels like he’s peering in on a private moment.
“Of course not baby. Told you I’d stop,” Billy replies with a big smile.
Eddie can’t help but click on the caption: “Simple prank makes boyfriend storm out!” With a shit ton of hashtags that Eddie doesn’t bother reading.
Sure enough, Steve bites into the donut and immediately spits it out. He doesn’t say a word, just shakes his head and storms out of room.
Billy laughs loudly, “Oh, don’t be like that, babe! You know that was funny as shit!”
Eddie opens the comments, and is surprised to find people actually defending the prank. There are some people who comment shit like, “date me instead! I would never get mad at your pranks 🥵”
There’s only one comment that says, “Don’t really find this funny.” But it’s swarmed with hate comments from Billy’s fans that has Eddie scoffing as he scrolls onto the next video. He watches for a few seconds before scrolling back up when he realizes something. He looks at the date of the TikTok and realizes it was posted the previous month which means…
Eddie sighs realizing that him looking through Billy’s videos will only give him more attention and views, but he needs to know how long this has been going on for. And he really needs to find out if Steve is in on any of it or at least had gotten Billy back.
He begrudgingly clicks on Billy’s profile and scrolls through. He finds several videos with the thumbnail being of Steve mid reaction to a prank, and Eddie notices that every time, the camera is far away, and there doesn’t seem to be a single video of him up close.
The whole thing doesn’t feel right to Eddie. But what can he do about it? It’s not like he can report the videos. He could simply just block Billy and try to forget it all.
He scrolls back to the top and accidentally refreshes the page. He’s about to block him when he notices a new video pop up, where Steve looks like he’s in the middle of a panic attack. Eddie immediately presses on it.
⚠️⚠️⚠️
Billy smiles at the camera, no shirt in sight as he laughs, “This is my biggest prank yet. Steve should be home in less than a minute. And look,” he holds up his phone and shows a bathtub filled with red water that almost looks like blood.
Eddie’s shaky hand covers his mouth. He wouldn’t.
Billy laughs and continues, “I sent him a text that says ‘I’m sorry’ and a picture of an empty pill bottle, and he’s been texting me non stop for the past few minutes. Shit, he’s on his way now so it’s time for me to hide my phone and make this look as real as possible.”
Eddie watches as Billy puts his phone on a shelf and seemingly stacks towels up to cover his phone and hold it in place. He looks away when Billy takes out a bottle of fake blood and stages a suicide. He practically shakes with anger. Steve has to be in on this. He has to just be a good actor.
Eddie’s stomach drops when he hears Steve yelling Billy’s name rushing through the house. He bursts through the door and falls against the wall in shock. “Tell me this is a damn prank Billy. Billy…” he gets closer and shakes him. “Billy!” He yells shaking. “Shit. Shit. No no no. Fuck. What the fuck…”
Steve sits next to the tub and puts his head in his hands having a panic attack. Billy’s eyes open and he winks at the camera before grabbing Steve’s shoulders and yelling, “Boo.” He starts cackling loudly as Steve confusedly looks around trying to catch his breath. “I got you so good!” Billy yells through laughter.
Steve shakily gets up, tears streaming down his face and runs. Billy gets out of the tub and makes his way to his phone. “Don’t worry, I’ll make it up to him later,” he says with a wink before the video ends.
⚠️⚠️⚠️
Eddie sits as the video reloops. He’s shaking with anger. He doesn’t think as he duets the video and mutes the other audio. “This is the most fucked up thing I’ve ever seen. These ‘couple pranks’ are stupid enough and not funny, but to fake a suicide and call it a joke… you have to be an extra type of fucked up asshole. There aren’t enough words to describe how evil of a human being you have to be to do something like this to someone you love. I don’t care if this is staged or not. This is not okay. And fuck you.” Eddie quickly censors Billy’s half of the video with a note of “watch at your own risk.” He doesn’t care if his manager is pissed or if his account is filled with Billy’s fans hating on him or whatever. He presses the post button and turns off his phone. He needs fresh air.
He grabs his keys, a hat, and sunglasses, and makes his way out of his apartment. Hopefully the damn paparazzi back the fuck off today. He makes it down his street and walks quickly, fuming with anger. He weaves in and out of people and curses the busy LA streets.
He turns the corner and rams right into someone walking at an equally fast rate. He holds onto the stranger to steady himself and keep them up. “Sorry,” the man chokes out and Eddie is about to brush it off when he realizes he recognizes him.
“Steve?” He asks. He knew Billy lived in Los Angeles but he didn’t know he lived so close. The thought makes him kind of sick to his stomach. He thinks he might punch him if he ever saw him in person.
Steve wipes at his face and narrows his eyes at Eddie. “Sorry, do I know you?”
Eddie glances around before lifting up his sunglasses and hat, waiting for Steve to recognize him enough to gain his trust. Instead, Steve just stares at him blankly.
Eddie’s heart races. This has never really happened to him. He puts on the hat and sunglasses sheepishly. “Uh, I’m Eddie. I know you from Billy’s TikToks.”
Steve just tilts his head in confusion. His eyes are red and puffy. He wonders if Billy posted the video so soon after his prank and if Steve is currently in the aftermath of it. “Um,” Steve says and clears his throat, “Was I in the background or something? He told me I wasn’t in his TikToks.”
Eddie’s heart drops. He opens his phone and goes to Billy’s TikTok, ignoring the way his own TikTok is blowing up. He turns his phone to Steve and picks a less traumatizing prank to show him.
Steve grabs his phone and his eyes widen. A look of confusion crosses over his face that slowly turns into realization and numbness. “He’s been using me for views after promising he wouldn’t, isn’t he? I even asked if the pranks were somehow stupid content but he said they weren’t. He…” he trails off and shakes his head. “Sorry, I don’t mean to be unloading all of this onto you.”
Eddie shakes his head. “No, no. It’s okay. I’m sorry that I told you.”
He watches as Steve numbly nods and scrolls presumedly through Billy’s profile. He looks down at the screen and back at Eddie. “Is this you?” Steve asks hesitantly as he turns the phone back to him.
Eddie confusedly looks at his phone and sees that Billy has apparently replied to his TikTok already. Then, to his left, he hears a bit of commotion and sees some cameras flashing. Fuck. “Do you trust me?” Eddie asks.
Steve looks at his phone and back at Eddie.
Yeah, that’s a lot to ask of him. “Okay, how about this? You keep my phone, and we run back to my apartment around the corner and talk in private before we both end up in shitty magazines?”
Steve tilts his head and glances toward where a few people with cameras make their way to them yelling, “Eddie! Eddie Munson!”
“You’re not a famous serial killer or something, right?”
“Musician,” Eddie says and holds out his hand. “One who hates Billy Hargrove.”
Steve looks down at his hand and takes it running alongside Eddie who tries not to think about the stories that might come out of this. Gosh, he thought his biggest scandal would be when he came out as gay.
He makes his way back to his apartment telling his doorman, “Paparazzi! He’s with me!”
Hopper just nods in response and opens the door quickly. Eddie sighs in relief when he makes it through and to the elevator. Steve looks at him and asks, “How offended are you that I don’t know you?”
Eddie laughs. “Mildly, but it’s a relief really.” He realizes that isn’t the biggest concern in the moment and changes the subject. “Are you okay?”
Steve sighs and runs a hand through his hair. He opens his mouth but the elevator dings, and Steve almost looks relieved. Eddie doesn’t press it as he leads him to his apartment. “Make yourself at home. Do you want water, coffee, tea, soda, or anything?”
Steve numbly shakes his head, so Eddie grabs two bottles of water and two cokes from his fridge. He puts them down on his coffee table and sits on the couch, watching as Steve kind of hovers in his living room with his arms crossed. “I won’t bite, and I certainly won’t pressure you to do anything. But you can sit on the couch if you like.”
Steve eyes him and asks timidly, “You’re not in on anything with Billy, right?”
It breaks his heart seeing and hearing how on edge these pranks have made Steve. “Fuck no. I promise on my guitar I have never had anything to do with Billy and I never will. Well… unless you count me calling him out on his shit on TikTok.”
The words seem to get through to Steve who sits down on the couch next to Eddie while keeping his distance. “So… that’s why you were on his TikTok.”
Eddie’s heart hammers. He nearly forgot that Billy had apparently dueted his own video. “Yeah, but it has to be really new because I only posted mine literally a minute before I ran into you.”
Steve looks down at Eddie’s phone still in his hands. “Why?”
“Why what?” Eddie asks genuinely confused.
“Why did you call him out?” Steve asks, not sounding angry just… curious.
Eddie shifts and play with a string on one of the rips of his jeans. “His most recent video with the faked suicide. That wasn’t fucking cool, man. None of the pranks he’s done have been okay. And I’m sorry that you were put through them - especially this last one.”
Steve’s face turns almost white. “He posted that? Was I… was I in it? Like… my entire breakdown was…” he trials off as Eddie slowly nods. “Fuck,” Steve says burying his face in his hands. Eddie is about to apologize or go on a rant about how much he hates Billy Hargrove when Steve asks, “Can I see the video you made?”
Eddie’s cheek flush red, but he replies, “Yeah, uh, I don’t exactly remember what I said because I kind of went into a fit of rage and posted whatever came to mind. But yeah, my password is 051599.”
Steve types the password into his phone, and stares at the screen blankly. He looks at Eddie and asks, “I’m not on social media… ever so… could you show me?”
Eddie nods and slides over until he’s a few inches away from the beautiful man, and he does his best to try not to think too hard about how attractive he finds him as he goes to his profile and presses on his recent video. His nose scrunches up at the sound of his own voice, but he doesn’t disagree with anything he said. Billy Hargrove is a dick.
“Can I see the comments?” Steve asks. Eddie nods and clicks on them.
“Woah,” Eddie can’t help but say as he sees blue checkmark after blue checkmark. The top comments are from @ ronancetheromance with the couple saying: “Only an absolutely vile person is capable of such a fucked up prank. #SaveSteve”. Another from @ willthewise: “remember to comment on here instead of the original video so it can get less attention!! #savesteve”. Several of the rest of the streamers who call themselves “The Party” reply to Will’s with the hashtag “SaveSteve”.
“Who are these people?” Steve asks as he scrolls through the comments. He comes across one from @ billyfan4everandalways saying: “Watch Billy’s new video and stop being so quick to judge!!”
Eddie clicks on the replies, and the top liked one - having more likes than the original comment - is from @ ericasinclair: “that ugly mullet man’s explanation is bullshit and everyone knows it. let Steve talk for himself or I’m not buying it. #SaveSteve #CancelBilly”
Eddie nearly follows the girl, but realizes that Steve had asked a question. “Most of them I don’t know personally honestly.”
“Then why are they defending me? I’m nobody,” Steve says as if it’s a common fact.
Eddie turns off his phone and puts it down, properly facing Steve. “I know I don’t know you well, but you are not nobody. And these people are defending you not only because Billy is a dick, but this prank stuff is abusive and shouldn’t be normalized especially with the following he has. Nobody should go through that.”
Steve turns slightly red and looks away before asking, “Can we watch his reply?”
Eddie shudders a bit at the thought, but turns on his phone and goes to his page. “Are you sure? I haven’t seen it yet either, and I’m a little prone to getting pissed at him.”
“I’m sure,” Steve says and even reaches over to open the video.
Billy still has fake blood on him and is scrubbing it off with an angry look on his face. He looks at the camera every so often, and it’s clear that he’s staring at himself in a mirror. What a fucking asshole. “These pranks are harmless, and even my boyfriend would agree with that. He enjoys them and he makes sure to show me how much once the cameras stop rolling and his shock has died off,” Billy says so with a smirk on his face that sends chills down Eddie’s body. “So, stop making assumptions about me and my boyfriend and keep making shitty music instead asshole.” The video ends with him flipping off the camera.
“Charming,” Eddie comments, pausing the video so it doesn’t endlessly loop, and turns to see Steve’s reaction. He runs a hand through his hair and shakes his head.
“He’s lying. I’ve been begging him to stop for weeks. Even slept on the couch in protest. But that last one was the last straw. I just… don’t know where to go,” Steve sits back against the couch and mumbles, “Fuck.”
Eddie shifts and looks at him. “Do you have any friends or family that could take you in?”
Steve laughs humorlessly. “My parent disowned me when they found out I was dating Billy. Didn’t want a bi son ruining the family image. I had to move in with Billy, and he used to be sweet really. Well… I thought he was for the first three months. When his TikTok career took off he moved to LA, and I felt like I had no choice but to go with him. I grew apart from the few friends I had before the move, and I was just stuck with Billy here. And I… I don’t know,” Steve sighs and puts his head in his hands. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to dump all of this on you. I just… haven’t really had anyone to talk to.” The man lifts his head, his eyes are tired and filled with unshed tears. He’s gorgeous really, but that’s the last thing Eddie needs to be thinking about.
Eddie takes a moment to consider things. Steve seems like a good guy. He has plenty of extra room in his too big apartment and money to spare that he doesn’t know what to do with. Honestly, he’s not meant for this lifestyle and never has been. He’s happy that his uncle Wayne is retired and living comfortably off his too big income, but it’s lonelier than he imagined it to be.
And with that thought Eddie tells Steve, “Then live here for a while. No pranks. I won’t use you for clout or whatever. I have a guest bedroom with its own private bathroom, and I usually never have visitors. And I hate parties, so you don’t have to worry about that either. I may be writing songs in the middle of the night, but my music room is fairly soundproof. And trust me, I would appreciate the company or feeling like my money is going toward something important.”
Steve stands up and shakes his head. “It’s okay, man. I don’t want your charity. You’ve already done enough.”
Eddie stays on the couch and says, “Please, Steve, stay a week or just a few days. If you hate it here, I’ll help you get on your way. But trust me when I say you’ll help me too. It’s…” he sighs and runs a hand over his face, “It’s lonely in LA.” He cringes as he quotes the title of his favorite song that he’s written. It’s also his least popular one, but it’s the most honest thing on any of his albums.
“Reminds me of that song,” Steve says with a small smile.
Eddie’s head snaps up. “You know it?”
Steve hums the chorus of Eddie’s song and Eddie joins in. Steve stops to ask, “You know it, too?”
Eddie huffs a laugh. “I wrote it.”
Steve looks at him for a few moments longer with a combination of shock and hesitation. Then he surprises Eddie by asking, “You really wouldn’t mind if I stayed?”
“Not at all. Unless you ended up doing something really drastic like trying to murder me.”
Steve snorts, and Eddie finds it endearing. He tries to shake the feeling away. He can not fall for this man when he’s a guest in his house and especially not after everything he’s been through. But then Steve gives him a real smile and holds out his hand saying, “It’s a deal.”
And when Eddie takes his hand and feels how warm and nice it feels in his, half of him wants to argue that it’s just because it’s been a while since he’s actually had a genuine conversation with another person. But the other half is quick to accept that he’s absolutely fucked when it comes to this stranger that he feels like he’s inevitably going to fall in love with.
#steddie#eddie munson#steve harrington#stranger things#steddie ficlet#tw: faked suicide#tw: abusive relationship#not Steve or eddie#thank you people in tags for reminding me to tag these things
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I didn’t watch the video and I won’t because I don’t enjoy their takes or the way they present their content so I may be missing some in video context but someone mentioned something that really struck me this morning in the tags. I don’t add on to posts as a general rule unless I really feel the need, and this is in no way meant as a call out for either source but I do want to address the general idea presented.
Stolas was never triggered by Stella yelling at him so he should not have been triggered by Blitz yelling at him.
There are a few very glaring things about this idea.
First the entire premise that a person wouldn’t have different reactions to different people in their life doing similar things is kind of silly on its face. There are a number of reasons why you would have a disproportionate reaction to being yelled at by one person over another.
Being yelled at by a stranger in a public confrontation is much different than being yelled at by someone you know in a space you consider safe, for example. Being yelled at by someone you consider physically intimidating is much different than being yelled at by someone you don’t. Being yelled at in a professional space is much different than being yelled at in a personal one. Etc. etc. etc. They all produce very different emotions and very different responses.
There are a number of contextual circumstances that will change how someone reacts to a similar situation as well. The most obvious to apply here is the relationship dynamic between the individuals.
On the one side we have Stella who Stolas in no way wants to be with, who he has been forced to be with for 17+ years, and who has seemed fairly consistent in her treatment of him over that time period. Where we see Stolas in the narrative is after many years of putting up with her behavior. Not only would Stella’s yelling be something Stolas is probably a bit inured to after dealing with it for so long, but he has also trained himself to change his behavior to keep the peace as it were. On top of that he has spent the past 17 years pushing down his own emotions and reactions to provide a family environment for his daughter. And we do see Stolas react negatively to her abuse, he flinches, he drinks excessively, he takes medication to regulate his mood, he backs away from her, he modulates his behavior to placate her.
Blitz on the other hand is someone Stolas is emotionally invested in. He cares for Blitz and while Blitz is abrasive and crude we don’t have examples of him outright yelling in anger at Stolas. He has also mentioned multiple times that Blitz is the one who broke him out of this repression. Of course he would react differently to Blitz versus Stella, they are literally the two opposites ends of a core character conflict he has.
We must also consider the power dynamic. Up until this point Blitz went out of his way to maintain their relationship, he deliberately avoided confrontation. He states this directly in his part of the duet, we see it in his text messages or the lack there of, we have evidence of it with the sex chest and his little shopping spree. So from Stolas’s point of view this person yelling at him now has only ever accommodated him or avoided him before, which, while also being a huge issue in their relationship, also escalates the moment when Blitz does push back and break down.
Stella has none of this baggage, her yelling does not reveal hard truths Stolas has to also deal with and confront. Stolas can justify his behavior with her because she never cared for him anyway, he did not hurt her with his actions. Stella’s yelling does not come from a place of hurt and betrayal regarding Stolas as she never cared for him or their marriage anyway. He did hurt Blitz however, and that hurt is being presented to him in a very aggressive way, and he had hoped up until this point that Blitz cared for him as well. So not only does he now realize Blitz doesn’t care for him (or that’s how he interprets it) but that he also views him in this really horrible way, as someone who takes advantage of those lesser than him, that he is pompous and unfeeling and cruel. He is the monster he feared being.
Which leads me to the next glaring difference. Stolas spent however long preparing for this moment where he revealed his feelings, he was hopeful and excited and nervous. He is then, in his mind, rejected. He is experiencing a range of emotions during this confrontation that all come to a boiling point.
With Stella her yelling is not a building confrontation of emotional ups and downs, it’s an environmental constant. In just a matter of minutes with Blitz he goes from nervous hope to rejection to realizing the person he cares for thinks really terrible things about him and the manner in which that is revealed is extremely charged. There is a world of difference between something you expect to happen (Stella yelling) and something you didn’t. Stolas has no idea Blitz had these feelings inside him, that’s part of the problem, and they were revealed to him in a very crushing and intense way.
We also have to consider that these are not real people reacting to the situation as real people might. This is a story being told to us and the writers and animators are presenting what is relevant to that narrative and these characters in a very concentrated way. They only have so long to get a point across and they must continue the story by contriving reactions we would not see in reality. In this episode and in the story overall so far we are given all the information we need to see it from both points of view and see why each of them reacted in the ways we did.
With storytelling of this nature you are not in the character’s heads so you much rely on actions, dialogue (which can be reliable or not) and environmental cues to get these points across. They did a phenomenal job in my opinion.
We have both of their mental headspace’s at the beginning presented in song, we get an idea of where they are at when the confrontation begins, and where they end up is a natural conclusion to the high emotions on display. The atmosphere is tense and dark, it’s a building anticipation with the music and the silence and the lightning being used, how the shots are framed. We get a sense of Blitz chasing him down, weaving through hallways and kicking open doors. It’s cinematic, because it’s a visual medium. Stolas HAD to remove Blitz from the situation in order to continue the narrative, he has magic in this story so he sends him away. In the real world there would be a lot of “Get out.” “No.” “I said get out” etc etc but that’s not interesting for the audience and in this world we have magic so whoosh, out he goes, the conflict continues into the next episode.
There are a number of things I could discuss related to domestic violence, or emotional triggers, or trauma responses but I don’t think that’s necessary here. Not only are these not real people and we are not privy to all of the baggage they have, how their individual brains process it and how they respond to it but the storytelling method is not conducive to those kind of real world considerations. What we do know is people react to different things in different circumstances with different people and the narrative absolutely justified Stolas’s response to Blitz and its contrast to his responses to Stella.
That is actually kind of the whole point?
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So, with the main part of this whole thegirlwhorideslikeasamurai (Samurai from here on) situation having blown over, I thought I'd make a final-for-now summary post that outlines the key points in this situation so that I can cap this for the time being. It's also for the people who've stumbled upon one of the many posts about this and have no clue where to start or don't understand the context, because yeah, there's a lot. I've had multiple people reach out who were in that situation, so here's the summary for anyone who's interested.
Links to all the posts in this situation:
Initial posts: 1. Samurai's answer w/ my response 2. Samurai's response to me
Main threads: 3. Culture and fandom thread 4. Screenshots thread
Other threads: 5. Initial receipts 6. First ask 7. First anon ask, rebuttal 8. Second anon ask 9. Third anon ask 10. Fourth anon ask 11. Fifth anon ask 12. Sixth anon ask, thread 13. Disclaimer to not misuse my posts 14. Follow-up regarding Samurai's continued hypocrisy
I will be referring back to these post in the normat "no. #".
There are multiple key players in this whole thing but seeing as this post contains primarily my words and take on things (and the others involved have honestly had enough stress about this for one month) I've elected not to tag them. You can find them in the posts I linked to. However, I will note the abscence of any real response from Samurai. I'll get into that further down.
A big thank you to everyone who's contributed to this discussion. It's been wonderful finally getting all this stuff out in the open.
Break for those who want a usable dash or don't care. But I encourage you to do so because this does matter for your fandom experience going forward.
So first, what happened? Well, the first thing to understand is that this whole thing started a long time ago, and the reason it's becoming a big thing now is pure chance. It was going to happen eventually. It happening now is just how it went. But for the sake of cohesion, I'll approach it from where the situation itself arose, especially since it displays some of the behaviours I'll be highlighting later pretty well.
The way this all kicked off was that Samurai posted no. 1 in response to an ask about the canon vs. fanon spelling of Yuuri and Viktor's names. In this response Samurai was pretty rude and demeaning towards Japanese name translation inconsistencies. There was also a minor spelling error. I pointed these things out in a reblog of Samurai's post which can also be found in no. 1. Now, Samurai did respond to this, but not in the way you'd think. She didn't reblog my post. Instead, she quietly edited the spelling error in her original post (just became incorrect in a different way), and then reblogged that new version of her own post and tagged me in it. Strange, but okay, I guess. In her response she apologised for the cultural insensitivity and explained that English was not her first language which, sure, that's fair. However, she also went on to explain the spelling error was actually just a misunderstanding, and then was even more wrong about Japanese in her explanation of that. Go to no. 3 to get an explanation as to why she was doubly wrong. I couldn't be bothered to start anything about this poor response, so I reblogged it so people could see it, said "sorry if I was harsh, have a good day", and went on my way.
Later that same day I then got an ask (no. 3 and 4) about that last reblog which said that I shouldn't have apologised for being right, and explained that Samurai was not a stranger to poor behaviour and bad takes. I was already tired of Samurai and had been for a while, so I answered the ask by explaining that I just apologised to keep the peace, but I was over trying to do that anymore.
And this is where the situation took off from. People started reblogging my post with their own grievances about Samurai, including bad experiences from interacting with her, and I began getting asks where people corroborated these claims and shared their own frustrations. I won't explain those asks and reblogs here since they're in the links at the beginning, and their main points can be boiled down to the following:
Avoiding accountability Samurai has a knack for worming their way out of taking accountability for their actions. She'll divert attention from the issue at hand, she'll use whataboutism to point fingers back in your face, she'll fabricate a sympathetic angle of her actions and use your natural tendency to want to see the good in people against you, she'll make sure you know just how sad and insecure she is, and she'll do it all while talking like she's an expert. Like when she responded to my post but didn't actually admit that the spelling mistake was just that. A mistake. She didn't have some advanced knowledge that she proceeded to explain. She was just wrong. Twice. And she couldn't even just say "Ah sorry, my finger slipped."
Victim complex She's also always the victim. She doesn't get enough engagement? The fandom doesn't understand her. She's trying so hard, why are worse posts getting attention when she makes such high quality stuff? The fandom must be rotting from the inside with no academics left to admire her supreme intellect. Someone posts an anylisis similar to hers? Plagiarism! Thievery! Piracy! It could never be because there are only so many scenes and conclusions to draw about said scene in a show that people have been analysing for eight years. Someone disagrees with a conclusion of hers? Well they're an acephobe, of course! A bigoted Karen who's trying to erase the real academics in the fandom! God forbid someone criticises her? Blocked, blocked, blocked, the fandom is so toxic, omg, she needs to get better at recognising fake friends, smh.
Manipulating the narrative As you might not be surprised, she also loves being in control of what her audience sees of the discourse she gets into. See: her not reblogging my post and instead making a separate post when that was more work than just responding directly. She's also notorious for editing her posts so when people criticise them she can feign ignorance and claim she never said that. And in terms of the individuals who've been intimidated into silence by Samurai and her entourage, if their stories got out, that would be a catastrophe, right? It would hurt her precious reputation after all.
General Manipulation and Gaslighting And yeah, that leads us to the big one. Now, these are hefty accusations and I'm especially bringing up the latter a bit dubiously. However, I think it needs to be said that many of the tactics she uses are manipulation strategies. I'm saying that as someone who's been at the receiving end of these methods. They get you to shut up. They get you to doubt your own judgement. They get you to think things you wouldn't have otherwise. And, most importantly, they get you to forgive things you never would. They worm themselves into your brain and get you to question your own ability to make decisions and understand the world. And that right there where it becomes gaslighting. Again, I'm not saying Samurai is being all that extreme but I am saying that she's leading people down the slippery slope of accepting this type of behaviour by convincing them that it's actually okay because she said so.
Insincerity This overlaps a good amount with manipulation, but I thought it was necessary to point out separately, because she's notorious for it. As was mentioned in no. 12, she has repeatedly displayed disingenuous behaviour across social medias and has used those different behaviours to twist the story into what she wants it to be, so she comes out of it looking either like a victim or like an underdog and saviour of the fandom. Is it a crime to want to look good online? Of course not. Does she use that liberty to fabricate a benevolent image of herself despite repeatedly not living up to said image? Very much so.
Bullying and Namecalling This goes back to how I mentioned her accusing people of being acephobes for not agreeing with her very important and perfectly correct analyses. Beyond this, she has also called people illiterate for not agreeing with her analyses as if these "academic" takes of hers are so obviously right that only someone incapable of accessing the source material would disagree, has called someone a Nazi for using the actual current DSM-5 medical term for autism (as far as I've been informed in private, see no. 3, 4, and 5 for partial context), and has recently become very fond of calling people dicks.
Superiority complex This all of course comes down to the actual issue at the bottom of all of this: Samurai thinks she's better than the rest of us. She thinks she's more academic, more literate, more intellectual, and laments the lack of people who can match her frea- I mean, level. No weird takes on her blog as she says (no. 4). This is a "dick" move to use her own vocabulary but is even worse when you realise that she's not all that academic or intellectual herself. Which, by the way, is completely fine! You don't need a PhD to discuss anime men. However, she makes it sound like that. She belittles posts that aren't as "academic" as hers simply because they upset her or have more interactions. She belittles the entire fandom simply because other people don't subscribe to her lonely intellectual narrative and enjoy fandom casually. She insists that her analyses are better than other metas when the academia she's so proud of isn't even really there in a lot of them. And she will absolutely make you feel worthless for thinking you can contribute to the fandom on her level because no one is as good as her.
Do I really care much about some arrogant loser on the Internet? No. Do I care that she's belittling her entire community by ridiculing their contributions and positioning herself as the one true deliverer of gospel? Absolutely. See, the issue isn't just that she's arrogant. It's that that's not enough for her. She pushes the rest of the community down so that she can feel even more superior. She also routinely complains about her lack of engagement which, wow, what a mystery, what might be scaring them away? But secondly, she's indirectly belittling the support the fans of her content are giving her. No. 11 is from one such fan who experienced this. Let it be made clear that Samurai might genuinely want to form a community and be social, but she does not see herself like the rest of us when it comes down to it. She sees herself as better. Or, at the very least, she posts as if she does.
Okay, that's all well and good, but Arom, why does this matter? Isn't it just petty fandom drama? Why should we care? Well, you should care because the people who've been hurt by this behaviour and those who've left the fandom to be free of it are your peers. They're not random Internet strangers. The next one could be your close fandom friend. The one after that could be you. The reason I'm making this post is so that you can understand how Samurai operates and not fall for her tactics. They're incredibly easy to start forgiving. I've been there. You have to catch this stuff before it turns into something legitimately damaging. I also want you guys to be able to take this situation with you and apply what you've learned to other actually dangerous people. I don't consider Samurai dangerous. To be frank, I consider her an immature embarrassment. Can she hurt you? Of course, but the scope will be limited. However, there are plenty of people of there who are much better at doing these things and do them far more insidiously with far worse goals. I want you all to be able to realise before it's too late. I was in one of those much more insidious friendships once even if the goals weren't any worse than Samurai's. They sneak up on you so damn fast.
And now, because I know some of Samurai's entourage might be itching to hit me back with this: Why is this public? Shouldn't stuff like this be kept private? Isn't this just us bullying Samurai in the hallway where everyone can watch?
Now, if you're a specific person, you'll likely recognise these coming points because yes, they're lifted directly from your ask. However, seeing as this ask was not sent to me (I'll leave you guys to ponder why that is considering all other asks were) and has not been published because the recipient didn't want to spend their energy on it, I'm not going to say who the asker is nor am I going to be speaking to them directly in this part. Rebutting a statement no one but me and a few others have even read wouldn't be fair to the asker. However, the ask brings up some very common points in discussions like this that I want to catch right now before anyone starts thinking those points are good.
So first: Why is this public? Now, on the surface this seems quite reasonable to ask, right? I personally agree that private beef should stay private and that there's no need making a bigger scene out of things than necessary. But this beef isn't private. It's not a one-off thing, and it's not new. It's been happening for at the very least months and has been happening both publicly and privately on different social medias. Oh, also, it has already been attempted to be handled privately. Doing so did diddly squat. People have actually been scared into silence by attempting to handle it like that. Some things just cannot be handled one on one because one party is entering it with malicious intent.
Allegedly Samurai has also been called out in a Discord server before (no. 12) which I can't confirm but wouldn't surprise me. Guess how much that did. Nothing. Nada. Nul og niks. But then you might be asking why a second call-out is supposed to do anything, and that's where I get to the real point of this whole thing: Getting the word out. This and all the previous posts aren't about actually getting through to Samurai because I'm acutely aware that she won't actually change by being told off. She's demonstrated time and time again that she'll simply wait the situation out and then vaguepost about how much of a victim she is and how toxic her ex-friends are.
So, instead of getting her to own up, we're trying to reach everyone else. If we can make people aware of her tactics so that they can avoid her or at the very least be wary around her, I consider that a success. If we can limit her access to victims, we'll have done what we set out to do.
Second: What about Samurai's mental health? Aren't we hurting her by destroying her reputation? Well, dear reader, what about everyone she's hurt? Do they not deserve to talk about this stuff simply because it'll make Samurai upset? This might be a kind of wild suggestion, but there's a very easy way to not be publicly called out for being an arse: just don't be an arse. No one made her do these things. Like mentioned in no. 12, she destroyed her reputation all by herself. If stating aloud what someone has done ruins their reputation, then the person who did said things is at fault. Spare the messenger. They've already been hurt enough. If Samurai had simply owned up to her behaviour and apologised and made a change when people had called her out in the past, we wouldn't be here. She made this necessary. Don't feel bad for her that she's getting what was always coming to her.
Third: Why are we digging up old posts? Isn't it unfair to hold Samurai's past against them? Now, I want you to notice what this whole situation is actually about. Is it about a single incident? No. Is it about a set of repeated behaviours which are harmful and manipulative? Now you're onto something. I agree that digging up unrelated dirt on someone just to slander them for their past when it has no or an at best flimsy relation to what's actually being discussed is mean and unnecessary and should not be done.
However, the point of showing those older posts is to make it clear that this isn't a new thing, and it's repeated and unchanging. Bringing up their posts about being insecure and being sad about not getting traction isn't about those posts, it's about showing how much Samurai clearly cares about interaction and to point out a repeated behaviour of deflecting criticism by hiding behind insecurity and making their own fans feel bad about not being good enough. It's not about the posts. It's about explaining why Samurai is uncomfortable to be around.
Oh and fourth because this is the funniest thing: What about the new fans? They'll think we're all mean and negative! Okay so first of all, and please excuse my French, absolutely dogshit take. "What about the new fans?" Dude, what about the ones who are already here and are being driven away by Samurai's awful and demeaning behaviour? What about the people who've been hurt and are finally being heard? What about when the new fans see Samurai calling others acephobes and Nazis for disagreeing with her? Is that not driving them away? Is that not projecting negativity?
Now, yes, that was targeted towards the asker because oh my fucking stars, I haven't seen a take that bad in a while. If you want to ignore or criticise this point of mine, go ahead because I can't source it and the asker's full statement isn't publicly available so I'm aware that this is a weak argument. But I want everyone to know that if you've been ignored and demeaned and called names for simply trying to assert yourself, you're allowed to be negative publicly. You're allowed to publicly make it clear that someone isn't listening privately and so you're speaking in the only place they can't ignore. You're allowed to not be peachy and positive at all times just because a new fan might come across your post. You don't have to treat every post and word you make public as an exhaustive representation of the entire fandom.
And so, with all of this outlined, I have a personal message for Samurai and Co.: Do. Better. I know you can because I've seen you interact amicably with the fanbase multiple times. I'm not here to tell you to get off the Internet and I'm not here to get you to stop participating in fandom. What I am here for is to get you to treat the fanbase with the respect it deserves. You're not better than people just because you're queer. It's the Yuri!!! On Ice fandom. Basically everyone is queer. Get over yourselves. Develop some maturity and accept that you can be contradicted. Accept that not everyone will agree with you. Accept that just because you point really hard at canon, your analyses will still just be theories. And that's okay. You don't need to be an academic to be part of fandom. You don't even need to be right. You can be straight up wrong and still be allowed to be here. However, you also have to let others do all that stuff too. You can't tell people to be nice and then not be so yourself. Fandom is collaboration which means that sometimes you have to just accept that some members of the group have takes you disagree with or find straight up stupid. However, that does not give you the right to tell them they're doing fandom wrong or claim that your way of doing it is better. Because that's how you come across. Whether intentionally or not, that's the message you're sending. Stop acting suprior. It's actually very easy and frankly embarrasing that you haven't figured out how to not be insufferable yet. You're adults. Act. Like. It.
Finally, and I promise this will he the last thing: What do we do now? Samurai has been exposed, hasn't responded, and will probably just wait for this to blow over. What are we supposed to do with all this information? Well, you're free to choose of course, but my suggestion is to simply keep an eye on her and her entourage. They've so far showed no sign of wanting to change, and if you see them misbehaving, don't be afraid to hold them accountable, or, if you'd rather not be mixed up in this, feel free to shoot me a DM or even an anonymous ask. If I get enough reports or the reports are egregious enough, I might make a follow-up post just to keep people updated.
And if keeping a 40+ year old (yes, Samurai is really that old, I was shocked too) on an Internet leash seems extreme, just remember that she made it necessary. She clearly won't listen when people tell her directly how she's hurt them. In my opinion, some social pressure to behave is in order. All she has to do is be nice and nothing more will come of this. It's up to her. It takes a village and sometimes the entire fanbase.
So, it's up to you, Samurai. Your behaviour will be the direct catalyst for whatever I and others choose to do or not do. All you need to do is behave. If you can do that, we'll get to go our separate ways. If you can't, well, you've seen what that results in. But if you do legitimately make a visible effort to change, I'll gladly make a post about that too. I'm all for a redemption, but you're the one who has to put in the effort. Not your friends, not your fans, not your victims, not me.
Your choice. I'll be waiting.
And to anyone who's dying to tear my head off: Please read all the posts linked to at the top before responding. I'm not naming any names. You know who you are.
#that got long but is anyone surprised anymore?#anyway i hope everyone is having a good start to the new year#yuri on ice#arom antix
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Massive thank you to you and everyone else who calls out how shitty it is to get mad at peoples interpretations. Sleep tokens music is romantic. Its also toxic. These statements can coexist. Its not your business if someone plays bloodsport or vore or hell even atlantic at their wedding. Youre not them, you dont know what the music means to them. If you see a weird take just roll your eyes and move on, its not a big deal. Absolutely sick and fucking tired of all these "why are you calling this romantic/sexy? Youre stupid and a terrible person!" takes like fucking relax. Media literacy is important yes. Respecting that this music is dark and personal to vessel is also important. Same goes for respecting how people relate to the music in dark ways. But as long as people are not saying things directly to vessel or fans about how their individual trauma is sexy then just chill out and respect peoples different interpretations. It sucks that i cant talk about how i view certain songs without being called horrible things and having really fucked up vitriol aimed at me. Yall need to grow the fuck up and get over yourselves. Im not thinking of your personal shit when i call a certain song romantic/sexy, i dont even know you, sometimes im thinking of my own trauma actually lol. Lets all discuss this music maturely where we respect each other and what each of us as individuals bring to the table for interpretation, stop making this fandom toxic as hell for anyone who doesnt agree 100% with your own interpretation. (Also the whole "youre not allowed to say this song is romantic/sexy" thing is very dismissive of some peoples trauma in itself, it ignores how messy someones feelings toward their abusers/toxic partners can be. Pretty fucked up to call a trauma survivor stupid or a terrible person because a song reminds them of their positive feelings towards someone who hurt them) Anyways yeah, just tired of people being so harsh because they refuse to see other peoples perspectives. I genuinely think one of the most toxic aspects of this fandom is the vitriol over different interpretations, people act like outright children at times with it im ngl, especially with more sexual discussions. It also feels infantilizing towards vessel at times, hes a grown adult who put romantic/sexy elements in his music and he doesnt need people trying to protect him from those themes. Im rambling but this stuff pisses me off so much, this fandom needs to do better
Context post for the clueless ones - regarding my tags/replies
Here's the thing - I've been in fandoms for many, many, MANY years. This type of discussion isn't anything new nor unique to Sleep Token, but it sure does make a comeback quite often. It's tiring to keep repeating the same things over and over, but that's what fandom is all about isn't it?
Someone needs to say something, and I am not one to shy away from uncomfortable conversations like these. Something something, build your own community, be the change you wanna see, etc etc.
I've said pretty much everything I wanna say already under that post, but for the sake of clarity, and because I can't keep my mouth shut apparently -
Under the cut for length - you know the drill:
Music is art. And art is subjective. Meaning, each individual will have their own personal connection and interpretation of a given piece of art, which in this case is Sleep Token's music.
Did Vessel write the songs with a certain intent or meaning? Most likely yes! It's not hard to connect the dots and guess what events/emotions might've transpired and served as inspiration for them (accuracy to personal life is irrelevant and none of our business, but it's also no rocket science to understand what's been said).
Can we establish a base meaning for any given song, or better, can we have a general consensus of what a song is about based on its lyrics and themes? Absolutely! Not every song is like that, but we can all agree there's a lot of recurring themes of past relationships and mental health struggles.
Is it wrong to diminish the songs to one basic element (eg. the sexual undertones) and/or completely disregard the bigger, more important theme? I'd say it is.
Giving Atlantic as an example (which as a lot of you know, is my most favourite song of them and very dear to me): this one has some very blatant references to suicide and depression. Regardless of whether it is based on irl events or not (none of our business!!!), it is extremely heavy and emotionally charged. I find it incredibly disrespectful when people say random stuff during the rituals when he plays this one.
Or for example, how certain people reduce Sleep Token to "baby making metal", instead of acknowledging the insane (insane!) variety of genres and the profound lyricism they present.
Should we limit our views, and by extension, those of others, to surface-level interpretation, without allowing room for different views and interpretations, either fictional lore based or not? ABSOLUTELY NOT.
Vessel himself said to "not restrict ourselves to labels or genres because music transcends it all" (paraphrasing here). It's literally their whole thing. It's very hypocritical to be shouting from the rooftops about "media literacy" and assuming people are stupid or idiots for not understanding the basic, surface-level meaning of a song, when Vessel himself constantly writes in metaphors and half-truths.
I've touched on this a lifetime ago on one of my analysis, but if you *actually* look at the lyrics, you'll realise Vessel hardly ever says what he means. There's always something else behind his words, something he purposefully keeps hidden. It really sneaks upon you sometimes! I'm over a year in and I still find something new everyday on their music. That man has a way to weave in a hundred and one statements under a single sentence, that is just truly beautiful to study.
Is, say, The Love You Want, about a man (Vessel) mourning the fact that his love isn't reciprocated? Yeah! Is it about someone who, despite knowing they can never receive from their lover the attention and affection and care they want, will stay by their side anyways? It is!
Is it about bitterness, spiteful accusations aimed at the one person who should love you fully? Or a reflection of how little self-regard the singer has, so much that they are willingly and actively choosing to stay in a sinking one-sided relationship, because the alternative is too painful to bare? Can you flip the switch and see it as someone who is obsessively pursuing another person, and painting themselves as a victim? All of this, yes!
You can even eliminate the romantic aspect all together and apply it to a relationship with the self (past or future, or an alter ego), or a parental figure. The options are endless. There isn't one universal truth when it comes to music, and as such, all of these takes are 100% correct.
Many statements can be true at the same time - it doesn't make one more true or correct than the other. Simply different. The way we connect with music is very much dictated by our own life experiences, and no two people have lived the exact same life.
Can you prefer a certain way to look at a song, or completely disagree with certain takes? Absolutely! I know I sure as hell do! That's normal and expected and part of the fun in being in a community such as ours. More people means more ways to look at a song - isn't that just wonderful?!
Now, this is very obvious for most of us, but some people, especially in the younger rage, have been taught to look at things in a very black and white way. Not to be that person, but the truth is that the rise in awareness of social issues and "pc-ness", is slowly starting to eliminate the possibility of things being flawed and nuanced.
If you're wrong, you're awful. If you're right, you're obnoxious. Made a mistake? Get cancelled. Grow from your mistakes, but not like that. Learn from your actions, but change your whole personality in a day otherwise you're problematic.
You know what I mean.
Life isn't black and white. Art isn't black and white. Music isn't black and white. What may seem like a toxic, dark, obsessive depiction of a relationship to you, might translate to the deepest and most truest of loves to me. I can acknowledge something is Not Right, while still drawing my own conclusions.
Is Blood Sport a sad af song? Yeah! Definitely not the first thing I'd think of when in a happy relationship. But maybe that's the point. And maybe I do. And that's okay, and none of anyone's business. "Okay but The Apparition isn't a good example of a healthy and romantic-" TO YOU! Maybe that's what love looks like to me! Maybe I just happen to be into it! And what about it?
Maybe to me love comes with all the ugly sides too. The violence, the despair, the self-doubt. Who are you to dictate what I can or can't think? I highly doubt Vessel would go 🗣️ "WRONG! NO! ABSOLUTELY NOT! >:::(", so why would you?
You can, and should, discuss the songs with others! Maybe some people do genuinely need a fresh pair of eyes to help them get to the juicy core of the songs - that's why we're here! To discuss, and exchange ideas! You can, and should, call people out when their engagement with the music is being harmful to others (joking and laughing during Missing Limbs? No bueno. Speculating about Vessel's personal life? VERY no bueno. Choosing a potentially weird song to walk down the aisle? None of your business + not your wedding + you weren't even invited + none of your business. Notice how I've been repeating that. Notice again).
You shouldn't, however, shame and ridicule others for having different views from you.
I think, rather than engaging in pointless discussions and start accusing people of being this or that, we should all exercise a little "don't like? scroll past". Is it harming you or others? No? Then scroll past! Is it an awful, truly horrendous take about something you're really passionate about? Okay! Disgusting! Scroll past! Good for them! 👍
Also - keep an open mind. We're all doing this living businesse for the first time, no one holds all the answers to everything. It's okay to change your mind. It's okay to say the wrong thing and backtrack. It's okay to make a mistake and learn and grow.
You know what's not okay? Being a dick to others because the thing you like is being misinterpreted. It's hard, I know!!! You can block people! You can scroll past! You can look at pictures of your favourite vessel and cleanse your brain!!!! I know I do!!!!!
And this is a last afterthought but - you don't get to complain about the fandom you're in if you're doing nothing to change that. I see many, maaaaany of you bitch about this and that, while having 0 engagement aside from the bitching. Like?? Maybe if you spent more time reblogging cool art or gifs and less time whining about literally everything, this would be a much more pleasant space!! And I DO get to be a little petty here because I sure do try my best to make this a fun and nice community. I am allowed a little bitching 😌
Anyways, tl/dr: don't be a dick; don't like - don't engage; keep an open mind; gaze upon the vessels. Peace and love yall 💙💫
#i think i may have gotten a little carried away but! you get the gist#very rich of me saying don't like - scroll past while engaging in Discourse™ i know 🙄#but. well. i kind of really really don't like this whole “you bad me right” attitude some people assume when talking about certain topics#(and this goes for both the recent discussions of the referenced post and the whole identity reveal thing)#is it too much to ask for a little respect? dang it#i swear december is a cursed month for Sleep Token and fans. last year we had iii's absence + the Wembley situash + THAT WHOLE THING in here#(remember that? lmaoooooo)#and now we're repeating the exact same thing? cmon guys. euclid. break the dang bough already and be someone new#i said i wouldn't get pissy but here we are LMAOOO HYPOCRIT NUMBER 1 IS ME!!!#in my defense. i couldn't not say anything about that Espera thing 😤 my queens. my lieges.#and this. well. i am just annoyed enough to engage 🥰#ANYWAYS!!#gonna schedule this and go honk shoo some more#i wanna be peaceful eeping while ~this~ goes live 💙 muwah#sleep token#darya is unhinged#<- it warrants the writing tag#darya answers#anon ask
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The art I posted yesterday was a bit more suggestive than my usual fare. I'm going to talk about this in detail, but here's the long and short of it:
If you don't want to see tickling content from me that is suggestive, block this tag:
#fluffyspice
Here's what suggestive content from me might entail: shirtless men, kisses on tickle spots, expressions of pleasure or gratification from being tickled (verbal and/or facial expressions), hypnosis, or any of these things combined with bondage.
I will not be using this tag for bondage alone. I have always drawn light bondage (wrist and ankle cuffs, ribbons, and/or pinning). If you have a problem with that, even when the context is not romantic/sexual, then I'm gonna be real -- my content probably isn't for you.
More detail about this below the cut.
TW: Discussion of sexual topics and my personal feelings about sex.
I am primarily doing this out of respect for my sex-repulsed ace followers, particularly as a person who is also on the ace spectrum. I don't want to make my existing followers uncomfortable just because I might want to draw more physically intimate scenes. Please keep in mind that I have been drawing for less than a year, so this form of expression is still new to me; I do not know where my art journey will lead me, yet, but I really do not want to limit myself in that way... particularly since my content has been romantic and emotionally intimate from the start, so this shouldn't really be a surprise.
Sex without emotional intimacy does not interest me. This is not a condemnation of casual sex, sex between friends, or sex that is for pleasure and nothing else; there is nothing wrong with those things, they just don't do anything for me. I am telling you this so that you will understand the perspective of the intimate content I might make -- the intimacy and vulnerability are what I'm interested in, not the act of sex. I don't have a desire to draw "porn" in the way people typically think of and enjoy porn (I am also not claiming that porn is always devoid of real emotional intimacy, but I think we can all agree it is typically not the focus.)
Does this mean I'll get upset if you're getting off to my content? This might shock you, but no, I won't. I think self-love is healthy. If what I'm making evokes those feelings in you, that is, as they say, "between you and the lord." I am not trying to make you feel that way, but it doesn't bother me if you do; everything I draw and write is between consenting adults.
So, I guess I'll cut to what you're probably wondering at this point: Am I going to draw bobs, vagine or peanits? Probably not, both because I don't really have a desire to, and it would probably get me flagged if I did. There will (continue to) be shirtless men, though, and I might even draw them being tickled on their nipples. There might be buttcheeks, too (ouh là là).
That's all I had to say, I think. If you have questions about this, I'm happy to answer them (or try to, at least) but please keep in mind I am not an "authority" on these topics, I'm just a guy telling you how I feel. I am going to put either a link to this post or some explanation regarding this in my pinned post, when I get around to revamping it (whenever that is, haha).
I love you, and thank you so much for reading this and enjoying my content. I know I get ranty sometimes, but my experience on this app is 90% positive and I am so, so grateful for your support and kind messages. Even if I don't always respond, I read every one, and I appreciate it so much. 💙
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Yet Another Fandom PSA - tagging ships
Hi, it's me again.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/2a4eea3e39c01c0fa4d3c67f8a668e2f/2d4d92456eede539-19/s540x810/01e5213866569a424819c45e79e08ae43b8e13ff.jpg)
Today I come with a small (ish?) pet peeve regarding proper tagging - tagging ships.
(⬆ This is where the magic happens)
What should you tag in "Relationships"?
Tag only the main relationship(s) that show up in the story. The relationship the fic is really about. Is about siblings? Is about a romantic relationship? Is about a platonic ship? Tag that, and only that.
Note: For Romantic relationship, use Character A/Character B. For Gen and Platonic relationships, use Character A & Character B
Don't tag relationships that are not relevant, or appear as background.
That includes, secondary ships that develop in the background or are established "off-screen" and don't actually have any screen time in the fic.
What if I want to warn/describe a ship that does show up anyway?
You can tag them as background in Additional Tags, adding some information that nuance how they show up if you want. For example, if it's a mention, or past relationship or if it's a temporary pairing but not the endgame.
eg. "Background Character A/Character B" or "Minor Character A/Character B" or "Mentions of Character A/Character B" or "Past Character A/Character B"
You can also use the Summary to specify and give context in what manner these relationships show up.
Why would I care? Is just a tag.
There are many reasons why tagging relationships properly is beneficial for the fandom as a whole.
First of all, keeps your tags clean and simple. It is easier for people browsing the Archive to know at a glance what the fic is about if your tags give the right amount of information and nothing more.
Second, it makes very difficult to filter if you like a ship that's not as popular as others. It can get very frustrating expecting your favorite ship to appear only to get to chapter 13 and neither of your ship shows up.
Third, the "otp:true" trick can only do so much.
If this is the first time you hear about "otp:true", it is a filtering trick that will automatically filter out all fics that have more than 1 "/" ship tagged in Relationship, leaving only the ones that have just the main ship tagged.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/1c4912c51b06a7e93aeb55b8619c31a5/2d4d92456eede539-4a/s400x600/9eb7d7c346efda35052a3f830bb12b5307bb461b.jpg)
ID has been added to the pictures as ALT text.
For more info, you can check out AO3 official Tagging FAQs and this helpful guide: "The Fanfic Author's Guide to Metatext" (This is the chapter about relationship tagging)
Here's more filtering tricks for AO3
As always this post is not meant to shame if you do or have done this. I have done this too.
I felt so bad when someone approached me and said "hey, your crossover fic with this ship is the number 1 fic by kudos when you search for one of the main fandom's small ship" and honestly? wake up call.
So there's that!
Remember to be kind and happy fandom! 🥰✨
#fandom PSA#PSA#tagging ships in AO3#AO3#Archive of Our Own#i know im not the only one who has done these i know#if you have more information to share please feel free :)#this comes after a friend ranted to me about this topic and uggghhhh please
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Could I get a little context about the "DinoDad!Starscream" AU?
I just read the post of the ask you recently answered, and I find the scenario interesting, but I could use a little bit of context, if you don't mind 😅
Primeval Anon
Yeah, I decided to give that specific AU a proper tag with 'Dino!Dad au' to make it easy to consolidate all the posts about it.
Overall, it's a TFP divergence of the Rogue!Starscream based on an ask sent in. Basically, Starscream made completely different decisions where he managed to find a Primal Artifact with the capabilities to revive Cybertron from sheer desperation and pure gambling... only to have it disintegrate in his hands. The Emberstone then utilized the bones within the pool it was housed for an eternity to bring back a little Predacon femme to life along creating a brand new line of beastformers with a baby Utahraptor and Deinosuchus bones.
Starscream isn't in a really good mental space prior to this, so he gets weird dreams and audio-visual hallucinations of his dead trinemates that implore him to take them in. I'm keeping vague on whether or not he's having a complete breakdown due to Seekerkin quirks as he's essentially alone and without resources or if Skywarp and Thundercracker are really speaking from beyond the grave since the Aligned verse is just that wild.
Bottom line, I've been receiving a lot of asks in regards about this AU since last year, and I'm going back into it since I've given it more thoughts where to take it as I really want to explore the concept where Starscream remains a rogue, delve into Predacon species and their relationship to modern Seekerkin, the (mis)adventures of a father with his animalistic and semi-feral children, Starscream forming friends/acquaintances with a random rural community and the local college, and actually has the power to actually make a decision on whether or not to rejoin the war on either side...
Plus, I think it would be absolutely hilarious for both sides to go 'pstpstpspt' to him for different reasons. Autobots since Tempest, the littel Predacon femme, has the capability to seek out Energon deposits as her sensors are more finely tuned and far more advanced than modern equipment, and the majority believe that Starscream has no parental instinct or will allow M.E.C.H. access to them. Deceptions as Starscream has now become the foremost expert in extinct frames and the only mech with healthy sparklings, so Shockwave can't let that professionally slide and Soundwave would like to hear pattering little pedes to tell himself that the movement was worth it as those three wouldn't have the yoke of the Golden Age upon them.
#ask#primeval anon#transformers#dino!dad au#transformers prime#tfp#starscream#parental relationship#original characters#bitlets#sparklings#cybertronian biology#cybertronian culture#maccadam#my thoughts
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This week’s writer spotlight feature is: Pricklywhicket/@messessentialist ! Prickleywhicket has four fics published to AO3 -- All in the Steddie tag!
Our anonymous nominator recommends the following works by pricklywhicket:
so let's sneak in from the cheap seats, honey
it's supposed to be fun (turning twenty-one)
start by pulling him out of the fire
"Sadie is so super talented in the way she describes literally everything. She is so good at writing and it's a shame that she's flown under the radar because she's not the quickest at putting things out there." -- Anonymous
Below the cut, Pricklywhicket answered some questions about their writing process and some of their recommended work!
Why do you write Steddie?
Why do any of us write anything? Because we want the story to exist in the world, and it doesn’t yet, so we gotta hike up our pants and do it ourselves!
What’s your favorite trope to READ?
Hurt/Comfort. I’m always a sucker for the blorbos taking care of one another, in whatever form that takes. This has always been true, across a truly astronomical number of fandoms I’ve found myself dabbling in over the years.
What’s your favorite trope to WRITE?
…actually, probably hurt/comfort! I just need to get those little dudes some validation and unconditional positive regard, okay?
What’s your favorite Steddie fic?
I’m sure I won’t be the first one to say this, but: I HAVE TO PICK ONE????? Okay, alright. I can do this. I’m gonna say…Sanctuary by SpicedSage.
Is there a trope you’re excited to explore in a future work but haven’t yet?
I’ve only written canon or canon-adjacent fic so far, so I’m eager to work on something that’s completely AU. I think there’s a unique challenge to keeping characters recognizable as themselves in a world that might not have all the same contexts that made them into that person.
What is your writing process like?
I would love to say it’s super organized and well-planned, but the truth is it’s mostly about routine and responsibility. I set aside time to do it every day, even if I can only tap out a few sentences. I’m not very strict about writing in a straight line - I can stop a scene if it’s giving me trouble, write a note about what I think happens in some [brackets], and move on to something that I have more fully fleshed-out ideas for. Sometimes writing the next scene helps you know more about what needs to happen in the current one.
Do you have any writing quirks?
I'm sure my betas would say yes 🙃 I tend to write a lot of dialogue - a lot of my revision process is going back through and realizing I have two pages of a conversation with no indication of what’s physically happening in the world around the speakers.
Do you prefer posting when you’ve finished writing or on a schedule?
Definitely when I’m finished. Prior to my ‘23 bang fic, I had never written anything chaptered. I knew going in that I could NOT start posting if it wasn’t finished, because I’ve been burned too many times by abandoned works. I didn’t want to do that to people reading my fic, and the best way to avoid it is to finish before you post.
Which fic are you most proud of?
Easily start by pulling him out of the fire. The biggest, most ambitious thing I’ve ever attempted - I still kind of can’t believe I wrote 85k.
How did you get the idea for start by pulling him out of the fire?
Like most terrible ideas, it was spawned in a fandom discord chat. We were discussing the tendency of Steddie fics to centralize the party at Steve’s house, because his parents are never there anyway. And then someone mentioned what if the parents came home and found their house occupied, and someone else mentioned Wayne being there, and it just sort of…spiraled out from there.
When writing start by pulling him out of the fire, what was something you didn’t expect?
I had no idea, going in, that I was going to write a comprehensive history of the Wayne and Eddie Munson relationship. I started writing it where I did to give some background on Wayne’s existing distaste for the elder Harrington, and then I just…kept writing. Over the course of a month or two I wrote 20k of WayneAndEddie that I had no idea was in me - it just kept coming.
What inspired it's supposed to be fun (turning twenty-one)?
@wynnyfryd. It was a gift for her birthday. We were talking about our mutual love of Letterkenny, and she mentioned that the episode was her favorite and wouldn’t it be funny if someone wrote… and the rest is history.
What was your favorite part to write from it's supposed to be fun (turning twenty-one)?
I had an unreasonable amount of fun with that one in general. But I think my favorite part was Eddie polling the party about what Steve means to them all. It was fun to sort of put myself in each character’s shoes and think about how they would answer. Plus y’know, any excuse to unironically love on Steve Harrington.
How do/did you feel writing so let's sneak in from the cheap seats, honey?
I believe my exact words upon deciding to write it were “jingles miserably to a blank google doc.” This was a classic case of saying “god I wish there was a fic where—” and having friends tell me that it was now my responsibility to write it. I’m glad I did, though. I love that story, and it proved to me that I could write sex and publish it and not burst into flames. I also just really, really love summer storms. And Wayne’s use of the singular ‘herpe.’
What was the most difficult part of writing so let's sneak in from the cheap seats honey?
Getting over the fear of publishing something E-rated. It was just something I hadn’t done, and I had a lot of anxiety that people were not going to respond well to it. I made three people individually review the sex scenes before I even asked anyone to beta the full fic. Of course I was worried for nothing, the reception for that fic was super lovely and gave me the confidence boost I needed to attempt start by pulling him out of the fire!
Do you have a favorite scene and/or line from any of your fics?
This is like asking me to pick a favorite child. I’ll say this: most of my favorite lines in start by pulling him out of the fire were taken directly from conversations @wormdebut and I had about the fic. She’s my number one cheerleader and sounding board, and sometimes she’s so goddamn funny that I just have to include it. You have her to thank, for instance, for Steve quite literally dropping his croissant when he first sees Eddie in glasses.
Do you have any upcoming projects or fics you’d like to share/promote?
I have a couple of irons in the fire, but nothing I’m ready to share just yet! I’ve been taking a breather from writing (blame baldur’s gate 3, okay) but my WIPs are still very much IP. Stay tuned!
Outside of these questions, Is there anything YOU would like to add?
Not that I can think of!
Thank you to our author, Pricklywhicket, and our anonymous nominator! See more of pricklywhicket's works featured on our page throughout the day!
Writer’s Spotlight is every Wednesday! Want to nominate an author? You can nominate them here!
#writer's wednesday#writers on tumblr#steddie writers#steddie#steddie fic recs#steve harrington#eddie munson#steve x eddie#stranger things
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i can't link it but I'm still thinking about your tags on the post about ja'marr reassuring evan that he'll be there for him no matter what 🥺 and how ja'marr's comments always get taken out of context and made to seem worse. and how ja'marr seemed to take a dig at evan in that post-game interview, but did he mean it like that?? or was he just saying shit frustrated after a loss! and i'm thinking about ja'marr maybe seeing that going around, seeing what people are implying. and how he DOES love evan, how that's been his guy since they were rookies together almost 4 years ago! and like!! do we think he went out of his way to reassure evan this week, because he didn't want him thinking that he's just throwing that friendship away after a few bad games (we KNOW how much friendships mean to ja'marr 😭)
anyway. just felt like yapping in your inbox. have a lovely day <3
:((((((( as you can see i got incredibly into my feelings regarding the whole ja'marr and evan thing 😭
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/63d338bc432dffd90ba82017d00686d1/067225254b6d39f9-6d/s540x810/8f6af704613ccea68592d8e33ac054ad97340796.jpg)
i can't even begin to figure out why he replied the evan question with the big bucks thing sigh. his face when they mentioned the two missed kicked goals :(((( man was most definitely beyond pissed at himself and the entire play-calling and missed fgs and defense etc that he actually called out the play-calling and getting asked about the missed fgs probably pissed him off even more 😭 like 'yeah evan did miss those kicks fuck' and maybe reminded that evan did get extended ahead of him (probably got brought up during the discussions with the fo tbh) and his mouth ran faster than his brain or he just didn't even bother thinking about it at all because he was so pissed that he just blurted it out.
i highly doubt he meant it as cruelly as people think he did though. he's just the type of person to be straight up when you're playing shit (proven btw with him needling evan's missed kicks that one mic'ed up training moment). he loves evan, they were THE 2021 rookies extraordinaire who were undeniably one of the main reasons they made it to the super bowl! he knows exactly what evan is capable of, 'he knows to make those kicks', mentioning he got paid could also possibly be a reminder to everyone that they did extend him for a reason!! that he's proven many times before he's clutch, the amount of times he's won them important games from his game-winning kicks!! but again this is all speculation who knows what goes on inside ja'marr's head and i don't actually know him lmao.
no idea if evan approached ja'marr or the other way around but it's nice to read that they did talk after the entire shitshow!! ja'marr throwing his full support for evan :(( 'have the sort of relationship where they’re comfortable needling each other about mistakes' very obviously having joked around before on their mistakes but the one last week seemed to have broke their little friendship bubble and taken to the fucking grinder by the public so they had to do some good old fashioned reassurance. the way evan said ja'marr said would always be there for him 😭 oh shut up that's cute as hell.
ja'marr complicated mess of a man with big feelings and incapable of keeping his mouth shut at times 😔 i think ja'marr is just....incredibly blunt with his words 😭 had like 6 mandatory pr training in his life and walked away with nothing but 'don't cuss in front of the cameras so help me' and even then his impulse control is....shit.....and probably learned more from real life experiences than any actual trainings. (incredibly cute when he fails to keep his mouth clean though like that time when he cursed about d-lines shit cleats (look at tee's face at ja'marr's little oop and look around!!!!) or that 'always open' comment where he followed up with 'excuse my profanity' (incredibly attractive tbh))
and it just pissesss meee offfffff when his locker room quotes post loss (when he's in his feelings, when he's trying to defend himself, when they're obviously baiting him for a shitty soundbite to get taken out of context when he's never fully mastered how to pr talk and probably never will) gets clipped and shared around all these sports accounts and gets added clickbait captions that just make him seem like a shit teammate or a shit friend or a shit player who is just unsportsmanlike?? and when his thursday (??friday???) solo pressers gets clipped and posted they comment shit like 'i didn't know he was so funny' or 'never seen him smiling like this' or 'surprised he isn't bitching about something' like excuse me?? that's from the narrative you 🫵 put out yourselves 😭😭 so it's a good thing he has those pressers and gets asked these light hearted questions where he can joke around with the reporters who aren't hounding him after a shitty loss!!
and he's always been so blunt with words, words things in ways that can be taken out of context very easily by the public (its just who he is as a person okay 😭 like look at all those quotes about joe...) and the only way to stop people from running with the shit he says at times is basically to just lie his ass off (bless him. though the madden lies still confuse me. i think he just forgot tbh.) or just say 'i don't know' and clamp up (good on him tbh. do you think he's ever gonna have a little 'im here so i dont get fined' marshawn lynch moment). essentially though it's very much a ja'marr chase get behind me 𝖎 𝖜𝖎𝖑𝖑 𝖕𝖗𝖔𝖙𝖊𝖈𝖙 𝖞𝖔𝖚 kind of deal for me <3
and i mentioned malik (the qrt askfjkjfj truly fascinating how nearly all star wr1s are like this tbh) lmao people have commented absolute crap about him taking lessons from ja'marr in a very much /derogatory way but let me take things from a way more lighthearted point of view and say wow 😭😭 that's exactly a ja'marr fucking chase locker room interview special /full of love and joy and fondness. the gum chewing, the 'i don't knows', telling them to ask his coach, the absolute terrible choice of words 😭😭😭 my fondness for malik nabers has gone exponentially up i fear. he didn't even walk his shit back after this on his next interviews!! adore him <3
and thank you!!!!! i had a lovely day of voting mayoral elections and sleeping all day lol. i hope you have a lovely day too 🥰🫶
#ask#ja'marr chase#evan mcpherson#and a bit of#malik nabers#who is a darling <3 i will also protect you#diva wide receivers /fond and in love#like forgive me they're incredibly honest about the type of person they are and refuse to give bland pr answers!! they have a SPINE!!!#full respect to athletes who do pr talk btw a whole other form of not catering to the shit media wants and protecting themselves#also evan said something that boils down to he has to start playing right or he isn't going to be playing at all#and fuck offfff immediately wanted to cry i am not built for sports or just life in general tbh 😭
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https://www.tumblr.com/nalyra-dreaming/750916431920676864/hi-nalyra-i-may-be-reading-you-wrong-so-clarify
Regarding my last ask I have a rough idea but you can go ahead and explain
Sure!
So, buckle up ;)
So I just checked but the only true Loumand post I tagged “lol“ on was this one (if I saw that correctly):
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/82b27816c53a6ef31d3d8c61699ce2ec/73523dabba97bcb0-fa/s540x810/2b01d8b08208bb6c760121655067dc17c6b75f39.jpg)
Note that "I can SMELL the discourse that will happen already" there.
That is something I anticipate - because, well. Armand... is Armand.
I'll elaborate the (book) canon on that below the cut:
Armand has been a coven master for centuries, in the Children of Satan/Darkness and later as the master at the theater. He was literally tasked to uphold the laws of the vampires and did so as he saw fit. I have talked about them here, note also the difference these laws go through in the books:
Armand does what he sees is best, which does not always align with what others think is best. For example he usually hunts down rogue vampires, "cleaning up" so to speak, which is something that Lestat for example is loathe to do in the later books.
And he canonically influences Louis several time with the mind/spell gift, to make him do something - even after he promised Louis not to do so (here an ask with quotes):
Armand originally is interested in Louis because he is Lestat's ... he literally "imprinted" on Lestat when showed up after his turning, because Lestat reminded him so much of Marius.
Lestat goes to him to plead for Louis' and Claudia's life after Claudia tried to kill him, and Armand, though he did promise he would help Lestat if he asked him to, throws him into a dungeon instead, starves him, and then uses him at the trial against Louis and Claudia.
The trial itself happens because Louis - even deeply infatuated with Armand - decides to leave with Claudia and Madeleine after all. (And of course the coven knows, and insists on the rules.)
Armand uses the spell gift on him as they are taken by the coven to be tried.
Louis is sentenced to be entombed, something the original cult Armand was the leader of did to young vampires - until they're mad or manage to dig themselves out.
Claudia is sentenced to death. Madeleine as well. Later on it is revealed that Armand has a little surgical theater there as well, where he conducts the experiment of chopping off Claudia's head to sew it onto a grown woman's body. But he is unsatisfied with the result and puts Claudia and Madeleine into the sun after.
Armand digs Louis out after a while, and Louis feeds (a lot) and destroys the coven.
He thinks Lestat died there, but actually it is later revealed that Armand throws Lestat off a tower instead, and tells Lestat Louis and Claudia are dead.
Louis goes on, numb, and Armand... tags along, keeping a "veil" between Louis and the world.
Louis stays with Armand, because he has nowhere else to go - and despite knowing that Armand killed Claudia.
He stays until the veil is lifted and Armand finally tells him Lestat did not die.
Armand... is Armand.
We will see the horrific things he can do wrt the Devil's Minion arc with Daniel as well, because Armand hunted Daniel. And the beginning of their relationship was far from cute. I think that will be episode 5.
Also, Armand is not too big on consent. He does what he thinks best.
I reblogged something earlier wrt this as well:
So where does that leave us with the show and wrt my tag? :)
When Armand says he never hurt Louis then he is not lying. But look at their faces after:
That's history, baby.
Because no, Armand does not physically hurt Louis.
But he literally hurts everyone Louis loves in an effort to keep Louis for himself.
He experiments and then kills Claudia (and Madeleine). He hurts Lestat and tells him Louis is dead. He tells Louis Lestat is dead and keeps him under the "veil".
And it will be far from pretty.
#anonymous#ask nalyra#armand#consent#mind gift#spell gift#iwtv s2#iwtv#amc iwtv#interview with the vampire#interview with the vampire s2#amc interview with the vampire#interview with the vampire amc#iwtv amc#louis de pointe du lac#loumand#links#book quotes
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Warning! Potential leaks for season five of Stranger Things!
Alex (aka @dyersfilms on twitter, used to be swiftlynatalia) is the person who successfully leaked most of season 4 due to her knowing a source. She did, however, insist Byler was entirely platonic that season and they fought for most of it and only made up at the end in the pizza van, so…
Here’s her saying she won’t post any byler leaks this time around, which she has said previously.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/ffe74d4fd06a09ec4479055c96150b1d/71d9fe2d44edd424-c8/s540x810/df5f2037de5af81f61b87d3a423b1c167ba580f0.jpg)
She got a message saying they’re all fake, and she thinks they all are, so keep that in mind.
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Here’s a short one: Will distancing himself from the party bc it’s too hard to be closeted and to be around Mike. If real? Endgame fr.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/b0c2a76b1b2866b5b5265eb4bcabad13/71d9fe2d44edd424-95/s540x810/f0f82a1e55941c0dcc1451525174456258d1f374.jpg)
A ‘leak’ from episode one where shit goes down after the opening scene of Will singing SISOSIG, Will falls, and Mike helps him up,
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/d71bb84d07cfda316a8f5f02a1953df1/71d9fe2d44edd424-0a/s540x810/b00852f35d25aff75ab411ce4ee6fc43b95c05bf.jpg)
Here’s an extremely detailed one that casually drops Mileven breakup, Robin-Mike bonding over Vickie and Will, Will trying to avoid Mike ‘confronting him about the painting’, Mike and Jonathan fighting over Will’s safety. Nothing here is debunkable but…. Yeah. God, would it be nice, though.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/c20182ac0a72148b13066041fff9a062/71d9fe2d44edd424-32/s1280x1920/f07a34304d18a77c3f349952ab5fa9eac48726a4.jpg)
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/b360b6096baaa6dcfbb41872c83509e9/71d9fe2d44edd424-ae/s640x960/421c69616915f4b911199206b0ad8f9b8ea7341c.jpg)
The two most interesting ones. First, an ask that’s almost entirely plausible except for the mileven part - and that part, specifically, I’m calling bullshit on bc it claims that Hopper is still on the Mike Hate Train. It was made abundantly clear, after their talk and their awkwardly long hug at the end of season 4, that that’s in the past. Besides, it just wouldn’t fit tonally. S3 was the heterosexual-cliché, silly filler season. S5? Nah. Can’t 100% say it’s fake, but even Alex agrees this one isn’t real.
Lastly, an interesting one that’s plausible throughout which claims Mike gets seriously injured and spends some time in hospital. Will stays by his bedside after everyone else leaves and kisses Mike on the forehead. Mike wakes up after he leaves - I think the insinuation is that Mike does a Half-Blood Prince and wakes up knowing that someone he felt safe with was there, but he doesn’t know who it was. If that’s legit? As I said, endgame fr.
I do want to note that both the mileven and Byler asks word the ‘main character getting injured part’ as everyone being ‘shaken up’ so there are a few options: it’s the same person with legit leaks, and Byler isn’t endgame. That, I’d be more willing to accept, cautious as I am, were it not for the Hopper part, which sticks out like a sore thumb. Second option: it’s the same person messing around. Third: it’s two people, one building on the other.
Cannot emphasise enough that these are most likely just bored people having fun, but I figured I’d share them all. The last one is getting passed around the tag sans context, and I wanted to clarify everything else Alex has received. Do not get your hopes up about Byler based solely on these.
Letting my imagination run absolutely wild here for just a moment, however: Maya and Vickie are confirmed to be filming at the hospital set, presumably visiting someone. There’s also a pic of someone with bloody shoes. Imagine if Robin visits Mike in the hospital, witnesses some Platinum-Tier Will Byers Pining™️, and ends up talking to Mike after he wakes up - no mention of how long he stays there.
Lastly, it is fun comparing these to the more doom-and-gloom (re: Mike) leaks Sapphicjopper on twitter got. The awesome @solgmorell has a post explaining those in detail.
Oh, and an interview came out today where Shawn Levy said something insane but, you know, water is wet.
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[COMMISSIONS OPEN]
!!Emergency!!
But also, no pressure! - A friend from work and his mom are having a hard time keeping a roof over their heads. They have have opened a GoFundMe, however sharing this link would doxx both him and myself. So, I've decided to open commissions to raise some money to help them out :]
Disclaimer; Due to my tight schedule, I will not be able to fulfill commissions as quickly as I have in the past. And, because of the sensitive time frame of this fundraising, I have not been able to make a fancy commission info sheet(s) like last time, so we're doing this old fashioned text; Apologies for the long read in advance. For more information about expected timeframe to receive your commission, please read through to the bottom.
What do you charge?
Headshot/Icon (from collarbone area and up): $25 USD Flat color, $45 USD Full shaded
Half body (from the waist up): $50 USD flat color, $75 USD Full shaded - Not available for ponies
Full body: $75 USD flat color, $100 USD Full shaded
Additional characters can be added for additional 75% of the original single character cost. (Example; 2 characters in a pic fully shaded will be $100 for one, and $75 for the other making the total price $175)
May charge extra for complex or busy designs that take longer to draw :(
Simple backgrounds (color, pattern, shapes) are no added cost, however Full background requests will be an additional $15 USD.
I do take style requests, but only with the understanding that I might not copy the style 100%
If you want something done but is not listed (Like turning a human character into a pony, a pony into a doll, character redesign, etc.) feel free to still contact me and we can discuss the logistics of fulfilling such commission!
I do not issue refunds
Commission Boundaries:
Will do:
Humans
Ponies
Fan art or OC
Context dependent:
Turning real people into styled portraits
Anthro (Its not my strong suit, but I can do some)
Special commission requests not listed
Hard No:
Heavy gore (a little blood or bruising is fine, but beyond that is forbidden)
Anything sexual or related to kink/fetish, nudity, lewd, or otherwise NSFW
I do not do realism, though I doubt anyone stumbling to my page will ask for that.
Anything that promotes a hateful message.
Money will be asked for UPFRONT - I know some will be sketched out by this. Please rest assured, I am not a con artist - only a broke artist trying to help another broke service worker out.
Money will be sent through CashApp - No clue if it's weird for online commissions to use CashApp, but it's what I'm used to and I will not be accepting other payment types. I will send my cash tag when it comes time to pay up.
If you want to post commissioned work from me on this platform or elsewhere, I only ask that you credit back to this tumblr blog and provide link where possible (I know some apps don't allow links though.)
For tax reasons, I will be putting a cap on raised money at $400 - All money will be going towards helping my Coworker/Friend out. If you'd like to see proof of your money going toward his fundraiser I can provide screenshots with censored personal information. I will be allowing commission slots until that $400 is as close to maxxed out as I can get it, starting at 4 commission slots and will provide updates if I can open any additional slots.
Slot 1: [OPEN] Slot 2: [OPEN] Slot 3: [OPEN] Slot 4: [OPEN]
I will be sharing blog names of those who are booking their commission slot, as well as posting finished commissions here on my artist blog - UNLESS otherwise requested. You may ask to stay anonymous and/or not have your finished commission posted on Tumblr/Discord, or anywhere else public.
Time frame expectations:
In the past I have been able to do commissions within a few weeks of receiving the DM regarding it - I will not be able to work that quickly this time. Due to a large project I'm preoccupied with until the end February, I will not be starting on these commissions until the beginning of March. Despite the delay on starting the art, I will ask that payment be sent ahead of time, with the trust in me that I will fulfill your order when March comes around. Pinkie promise!
I will work in order of when I received Payment, and thus as your name is numbered in the Slot list. I will work on them (ideally) one or two at a time. I do not do commissions with due dates unless the due date is far out. This will likely take several weeks before I finish the last commission, but I will do what I can to fulfill each one in a timely manner and communicate progress as we go forth with the creative process.
I will send you a message when starting the drawing, as well as sending progress pics after rough sketch, line work, and after flat colors. I can also provide additional progress pics upon request within reason. I only ask for patience and understanding of my circumstances, and a willingness to communicate back and forth through the process. :]
If for any reason you do not want me to message you with progress updates, please let me know.
All that being said, you can contact me through DMs to place an order and I will work with you from there.
Thank you for any and all contributions to this fundraiser! Reminder that there is no pressure to donate at all, I just know I've been asked about commissions lately and this is the least I could do to help a friend out. ^^
-Mod Bee 🐝
#commissions open#art commissions#furry commissions#emergency commissions#commission sheet#open commissions#art commission#commission art#art commisions#pony commission#oc
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Unecessarily long explanation/analysis of what Re:vale's name might mean
I don't know how to start this ok so basically this post and these tags from @nitunio
inspired me to try to explain my own interpretation and I maybe accidentally spent several days looking into the etymology in the process and now I have more to say about it than I did initially. So I wanna start by outlining every potentially relevant definition/use of re and vale that I found and then I'm gonna talk about how some of them relate to Re:vale. This post has sections and a reference list baby let's go
1: Definitions of re
1. In music terms, re is the second syllabic note in a diatonic scale (do re mi etc.)
2. Re: specifically with a colon at the end is often used as an abbreviation of 'reply' (especially in emails) and/or as the Latin re meaning 'regarding' or 'in reference to'
3. In most cases, re as a prefix/affix indicates 'back' (as in return) or 'again' (as in repetition)
2: Definitions of vale
1. The Middle English vale (pronounced like veil) is another term for valley (derived from the Latin vallis), used in literary/poetic contexts or place names to mean:
A low stretch of land surrounded by hills or mountains, usually with a river flowing through it
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/c8079ccb1a8e2e20ee3df8cf8581de10/113cb544ae85fb37-d9/s540x810/3211482439511cdb163646ffb95b38bef6c128da.jpg)
The world or mortal life (figuratively and often with connotations of sorrow or hardship, such as in the phrase "vale of tears")
2. In most modern uses, the Latin vale means 'farewell' or 'goodbye', especially in the context of death (apparently this is really common in Australia? I've never heard it before)
3. This use is derived from valeō (or present infinitive valēre), which basically means 'be well/healthy' - so vale in Latin means 'goodbye' in the sense of wishing someone good health, safe travels etc.
Valeō/valēre can also denote strength and worth, and it's the root of both valour and value
4. From what I can find, vale in Spanish is mainly used as a colloquial term similar to 'OK' or 'cool' in English, but it's an inflection of valer which can mean 'valid' or 'worth' and is also derived from the Latin valēre! everything is connected :D
TLDR two main uses of vale both derived from Latin: vallis meaning valley and valeō meaning to be well/healthy/strong/worth
3: What 1 year and 4 months of being a Re:vale fan does to a man
Yuki and Momo's symbols are both repeats, and the two dots (resembling a colon) are what distinguish repeats from final barlines in sheet music (more of me rambling about their symbols here - it's also where the design on their rings comes from, which is something that I keep realising and then instantly forgetting about).
Considering this, I think that the most relevant and likely intended meaning of the 're:' in Re:vale is repeat - we also see English words with the prefix used in this sense pretty frequently with Re-raise, 'revive' and 'rebirth' in Dis one., and 'restart' and 'reborn' in Period Colour. The 'back' aspect also has some significance here, especially in Re:member (the word remember doesn't mean you're like. membering again. it refers to memories. but the title re:member is very intentionally split that way because re:vale both gains and loses a member, so it works with both the again and back implications. anyways). This is also a bit of a recurring theme in i7, what with the whole "the ideal idol is one that doesn't end" thing.
Turning our attention to vale as in valley, once you look into it the whole "vale of tears" meaning doesn't really align with Re:vale unless you only interpret their story as a tragedy, but if you were to look it up and just see the definition "the world" with very little context, then it seems pretty fitting for the most famous currently active idols in the Idolish7 universe. But it actually symbolises how they mean the world to me and also to each other. And the figurative world of suffering that they have put me through thank you and goodnight. Just kidding there's more. I would say something about the valley (landform) and how Yuki is the river and Momo and Banri are the surrounding hills but you get the idea. Momo would live by the river...... he wouldlive by the river. I think about this every day
Anyways. So I really can't say how much of this is intentional but the 'goodbye' vale is especially accurate if you consider the underlying meaning - it's a way of saying goodbye, but it's also sort of a way of saying good luck and be strong. It's the same as how Banri has to say goodbye to Re:vale, but he also tells Yuki to "find a place to sing as yourself". And valour is kind of Trigger's thing (see: valiant) but reaching a little further for the 'value' meaning, it goes back to the whole Mikansei Na Bokura thing - all three of Re:vale's members had to lose something important to them, but the time they spent with it was still valuable and in the end they're able to retain those experiences and move forward to something just as valuable. In the end the name is a bit of a cluster of things vaguely related to them but I guess if you put it together it's like. The repetition of them saying this to each other. Yeah Momo after his injury getting that push from Yuki and Ban's concert to start saying goodbye and moving on and yeah like nitu said him affirming Yuki. Banri saying goodbye/I can't be there next to you anymore but I'll cheer you on from the sidelines and remember the time we spent together fondly and be able to smile once we meet again (<- from the end of his re:member pov). Yuki stabbing me 12 million times in the chest I mean um. Yuki... yeah I'm gonna need another 14 days to write that post let me get back to you on that one. But you get the idea. You get it
I think I had another point somewhere in here but this post has been sitting in my drafts for ages and I still haven't thought of it. But thank you very much for reading if you've gotten this far!!! As a reward you get a hug from me and the reference list :D
4: References
These aren't organised well at all but hopefully it's not too bad
Australian Writers' Centre: Q&A: The Origin of 'Vale'
Dictionary.com: Re • Vale
The English Idolish7 Wiki (my beloved)
Reddit: Contextual Use of "Vale"
Wiktionary: Vale • Valer • Valeō
also the google definitions of most of these terms but idk how to link those and I can't be bothered
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