#(can i say highbrow one more time do i dare to)

[schmorge-quostanza]

been having some kind of writers block on and off for. ages idk. main problem is i wanna write a romance novel so good it transcends genre and gets cast into the literary canon and elevates the romance genre to something other than popular literature trash which is really what everyone sees it as rn (me too)

anyway. proposal for solution is. write a romance novel riddled with genre tropes. no transcending. no casting into canon. no elevation. literally the blandest romance ever.

is this something

[rafeskiss]

dumb & poetic ! ᥫ᭡

pairing: toxic bf!rafe cameron x reader

summary: rafe went to a party without you and you hear from a friend that he hooked up with another girl. he gaslights and manipulates his way out of it. based on the song ‘dumb & poetic’ by sabrina carpenter

warnings: gaslighting, manipulation, cussing, mentions loss of virginity, toxic relationship, no smut

authors note: short n’ sweet is out and this album SCREAMS rafe mf cameron. possibly gonna do a little story for each song….

he’s lying to your face. seriously, his stupid fucking blue eyes are looking right in yours and he’s lying. the same eyes he used to stare at and call gorgeous are now meaningless as he looks right into them and manipulates you.

if you kept track of every shitty thing he did, you’d add a gold star for the reason being highbrow manipulation right about now. he was great at it. but as the months went on, and you started to realize maybe the way he treats you isn’t entirely love, but love for controlment, you saw past it.

“no, i swear, y/n.” rafe takes your hand in his softly, “nothing happened. i was just… just off my ass, you know? c’mon, baby, you know how i am.” he spoke kindly like he wasn’t just lying about hooking up with a girl at a party.

he sniffles, “really, baby. i love you ‘n shit like i wouldn’t cheat on you.” he nods, like he’s trying to convince himself more than he is you.

you just look at him, no emotion on your face. his thumb caresses your hand like a tactic he’s trying to use to make you believe him.

he’s trying to come off as soft and well spoken, but if anyone knows rafe like you do, he’s so unbelievably far from it. you know he knows he fucked up this time because he isn’t screaming and throwing shit at the walls. maybe he feels some guilt.

“scarlett literally said she saw you drag that girl into a room at the party. why would scarlett get off on lying about that?” you say while shaking your head.

he throws his hands up in the air, dropping yours and shrugging. “fuck if i knew. fuck. if. i. knew.”

he’s really trying to sell this whole act. it’s insulting how stupid he thinks you are.

you sigh and drop your head in your hands, “i don’t know what the fuck to do…”

rafe kneels down in front of you. you look up, still resting your chin in between your hands.

“communicate with me, y/n. what’s going on?” he asks like he really gives a fuck.

you softly shake your head, “i love you so fucking much, rafe. and you always have a way of making me look fucking stupid.”

he furrows his brows, “y/n. do you really think i’d cheat on you like that? do you think that little of me?”

your jaw actually dropped. you literally gasped and opened your mouth in shock. do you think that little of me? you repeated that inside your head.

you stood up, rafe still on his knees. “do i think that little of you? i gave you my fucking virginity. i think the most of you! i’m the one that tells my friends everytime they see you being a psychopath that you just had an off day. i defend you to everyone!” you yelled. rafe looked surprised you actually raised your voice at him.

he stood up and stared at you intently. “if all of your friends hate me then why are you still with me?” he said bluntly.

you didn’t know that answer to that. not really at least. you love him. you gave your virginity to him. yet another trophy he can display inside his head that makes him feel more man than his father. and part of you deep down believes you can fix him.

you were silent for a minute. a small smirk was painted on his face that basically read ‘you respect yourself so little that you still won’t leave.’ for such a coward, rafe cameron was the most powerful person you met. and you knew that you were too for staying.

“you can’t keep doing this to me rafe,” you said almost like a plead, like in another universe you were probably on your knees begging. your lip quivered and your eyes were glossy but you wouldn’t dare cry; it would make him happier. it’s like a fetish to him— fucking with girls heads. fucking with your head got him off the most.

he went from being innocent and apologetic to demanding and egotistical, but at the same time he never stopped being either of those things in this conversation.

he aggressively pulled you into a hug, pushing your head down into his chest. “i love you.”

you bit the inside of your cheek. “love you too, rafe.” you whispered.

you felt pain because you knew he did cheat on you, but you felt pain that you had to take the blame for because you stayed. and you always would. he knew it.

[is-she-suffering]

06/2000 - Dazed and Confused

QUEEN ADREENA WORDS: ROGER MORTON

AGAINST THE HARSHLY LIT BACKDROP OF CALIFORNIA, QUEEN ADREENA’S SEXUALISED ROCK THEATRICS APPEAR AS A WELCOME BEACON OF DARK.

“I think childbirth is pretty fucking amazing,” says Katie Jane Garside. “I think that sex isn’t golden copulation. I think sex is like childbirth really I do. It’s blood, it’s blood and it’s caring and it’s breaking out.” We are trying to draw correlations for Katie Jane’s rock'n'roll band, but somehow even with prompting in the direction of Frida Kahlo and some edging towards Anais Nin, we keep slipping out of highbrow into something more amniotic. It is disconcerting, particularly because the Pre-Raphelite dryad of a singer is intermittently slurping pink slush through a straw with matching coral vampire lips.

If the job of an artist is to make you reinterpret life, then Queen Adreena’s ectoplasmic chanteuse is due for promotion. It’s been a long time since a band came along with such a powerful, prenatural, psycho-sexual aura. Drop the fourth ‘e’ out of their name and you find its derivation in the notorious American dominatrix Queen Adrena, a six foot four giantess who specialises in crushing submissive men. A fascination with the fetish world surfaces again in Martina Hoogland-Ivanov’s Victorian postcard style short films made to accompany the album Taxidermy. In one scene guitarist Crispin Gray crawls on all fours with a bit in his mouth while a naked Garside rides forth. In another, the singer towers spookily, a 12 foot child giantess in a 19th century ballgown.

In less skilled hands the Adreenal vision of insane sex faery rock would be in danger of descending into the dungeon of camp, but Garside and Gray plus bassist Orson Wajih and drummer Billy Freedom have taken extreme pains and a good few years to perfect their current incarnation. In 1991 Gray and Garside were the creative core of the briefly mesmerising Daisy Chainsaw. Their electric chair punk and Garside’s damaged doll charisma made a sizeable impression, but only one album - LoveSickPleasure - emerged before “fragile” Katie ducked out of the spotlight, shaving her head and literally heading for the hills. Most of the '90s was spent recovering. “I haven’t ever not been involved, I’ve always just done music,” says Katie. “It’s the one thing that’s been consistent in my life from the moment I can remember. I’ve always sung and it’s always given me solace, sanctity. It’s what’s kept me safe. Because I think art, or whatever you want to call it, it’s not, in my experience, a choice. If I don’t do what I do, I get very sick. I don’t want to make it sound too melodramatic, but what it does is allow me to be a witness of myself so I’m not absorbed by the other stuff that’s going on around me. That’s what I mean by it keeps me safe.”

In the intervening years before she met with Crispin again and reconciled their differences, Courtney Love had popularised Garside’s ripped petticoat and lace “kinder-whore” chic (“I adore Courtney, I think she’s amazing”). But no one apart from PJ Harvey proved much cop at the lid-off-female-subconscious volition. Backed by a ridiculously great band, Katie Jane is now the most stage-articulate and daring woman performer in music, making Tori Amos look like Sarah Brightman.

In LA, showcasing he Taxidermy album, she terrifies the crowd at the Viper Room. Her voice is now beautifully controlled, cutting from petal-child to succubus harlot. Eyes rolling beneath the flowerpinned snake tresses, she approximates possessed sex with the mic stand and spends half the show upside down. Then she heads to the nearest strip bar to study.

The music and the performance express a version of sexuality that goes against the norm. Is that a political act? “I’m not sure that I want to be political, but I think the true feminine has been denied and is really being written out. It’s got just a tiny little edge of the screen and I think that’s why so many women are so down on themselves. You don’t really witness the true feminine at work very often at the moment, but I know that she’s bubbling underneath, and things like eating disorders, they’re symptomatic of that, because she’s being denied. She’s being forced out of existence, but whenever you repress something or deny something it comes back with such a force.”

Unlike her very distant relatives the goths, Garside does not melt in the tungsten sunshine of LA. She’s of a different shade. Her complexity and the close partnership with Crispin shine through in Taxidermy. “Madraykin” is a blues in calipers; “Hide From Time” a creaking womb; “Sleepwalking” a dreamscape and “Cold Fish” is bloody bones violence. It sounds like Jane’s Addiction fronted by Ophelia. Katie’s addiction however, is not going to fuck her up this time.

There’s a track called “Are The Songs My Disease?” which appears to be saying all this might be bad for your mental health. “Yep, that’s true. But that’s what I meant in the beginning about if you’ve got a choice about this stuff don’t do it. But I’ve got nothing left to lose in a lot of ways. See, when the struggle really comes on, it’s taken me to some really, really crazy places that I wouldn’t have anyone else go to. It’s the place where people become Jim Morrison and Napoleon Bonaparte and where you become God and omnipotent and you think you’re the only thing alive. That’s the most frightening place I’ve ever been to and that’s also a kind of living death because there’s nowhere to go after that.”

[nekoastral]

How NOT to start a meeting: Magnus edition.

If you were to ask Ultra Magnus about how he feels about his job, he would reply with a typical “As leader, I do not have words to describe my motivation to continue bringing peace to our fellow bots.” Once he was alone, however, the weight of the title can be too heavy to bare.

He misses the days where he didn’t have to worry about every little thing in terms of ranks, regulations, or the typical propaganda. He knows there’s corruption even among the Autobot ranks, but some were so minor that he often left it to the bot’s next chain of command to handle it. If he tried going down there himself, it would cause a massive panic since Ultra Magnus was the leader. If he has to come down and it’s not for a interview or a meeting, you screwed up big time.

It takes a lot of restraint on his part and a firm glare from his favorite judge to keep him going down without a proper explanation. Nowadays he just stays at the headquarters. This job can get stressful and take a toll on his processor.

There was three reasons he kept going. And those three were at daycare. The three tiny tornadoes known as his sparklings. He would like to be at home more and be with them and his wonderful conjunx Alpha Trion. But they both have jobs and they cannot always be there. They were fortunate the staff decided to open a daycare for the councils sparklings to stay while their creators worked. Alpha Trion updates on the little ones’ status via a personal commlink and sometimes Ultra Magnus could hear their youngest Elita babble on the other line. He only hopes their oldest sparkling Sentinel wasn’t causing trouble. He didn’t have to worry too much for their youngest little mech Optimus since he tries to be a good boy

He was thinking of stopping by the daycare to see his little ones. Their smiles always brightened his day. But reality came knocking when a incoming transmission flashed on his console.

Oh right…

He had a video meeting with the council today. So much for his little trip downstairs. Ultra Magnus presses a button to open the transmission. There was Highbrow from Intelligence, Perceptor from the Ministry of Science, Botanica, Yoketron of the Ninja Corp, and last but most certainly not least, Alpha Trion. The judge of his spark. He won’t dare say that in front of the council members. He caught Alpha Trions optic when he gave him a scolding look at him. He didn’t have lunch yet. HOW DID HE KNOW?!

“Good afternoon, everyone. Before we begin today’s meeting, I must step out for refuel. One moment.”

The towering mech hoisted himself from his chair, walked away from the camera, and toward the door. Highbrow rolled his optics before taking a swig of a rather large energon coffee. He must’ve had a rough recharge cycle with his own bitlet if he ordered that much coffee. Yoketron hummed quietly to himself before taking a sip of his own drink: energon tea. Quite bitter. Alpha trion shook his helm at his conjuxs antics. He was about to take a bite out of a macaron when he heard the door open from Ultra magnus’ side. Maybe he came back already-

Nope. It was a little darkish blue sparkling with a rather big chin. He waddled in with a inflatable hammer in his left servo. He scanned the room to see no one was inside before seeing there was a transmission going on. He immediately made his way toward the desk and struggled to climb up the chair. Alpha trion began to choke on his snack once he realized it was his eldest son!!!!

“It certainly looks like it.” Yoketron added.

Sentinel managed to get up onto the chair and quickly positioned his squeaky hammer forward. He wanted to be just like his sire. A little too badly. He would never leave Ultra Magnus’ side once he was in his sights. Alas, this isn’t the case at the moment. Sentinel looked up at the monitors before scrunching up the most serious face a sparkling could muster. He tried to look cool. But he wasn’t. He was all cute. Botanica giggled at the attempt while Perceptor shook his head in disapproval. He would say something if it wasn’t for the death glare of the elder council member. No one was going to diss his beloved sparkling. Not right now. Not ever. Or at least not while Alpha Trion is around.

To the poor bot’s horror, Sentinel wasn’t the only sparkling who escaped. Two more sparklings was spotted at the door. One was a light blue mech with a red onesie on. He was holding a rather small femme in his arms. She was yellow with a light yellow onesie. She had a purple pacifier in her mouth. It was his second oldest son and only daughter!

“Optimus-?!” Alpha Trion coughed. There was crumbs of macaron stuck in his throat.

The young bot had heard his carrier’s voice and immediately smiled bright. He made his way over toward the chair where his big brother sat. Elita blinked as her brother helped her onto the chair. Sentinel moved her about a arms length away. She could still be shown on the camera. Then little Optimus tried to climb up to join his siblings. Sentinel frowned at his little brother and whacked him with his squeak hammer.

“Nwo!”

They could see Optimus lose his grip and fall rather hard on the floor. There was a loud THUD. He must’ve hit his head on the leg of the chair.

“WAAAAAAAH!!!!” Optimus wailed on the floor.

“My bitlet!!!!”

Mama Alpha was now considering running to the office. Yoketron was wheezing, Highbrow had spit out his drink, Botanica was concerned of the hurt bitty, and Perceptor was….just sitting there.

“Can we go on with this meeting.” The emotionless bot said.

“MY SPARKLING IS HURT AND YOU WANT TO START THE MEETING?!!” Alpha trion screeched.

Ultra magnus had just returned with a cup of hot energon when he heard his beloved yell. Just what was going on??? When he saw two of his bitlets in his chair and one on the floor crying, he dropped his cup and quickly ran to them. He scooped up Optimus who wanted a hug. Elita just now noticed her carrier had her favorite snack with him and glared at him. He wasn’t sharing!!! Ultra magnus picked her up next and she didn’t break eye contact. The poor bot sighed. There goes his private snack time.

“I relieve you of your post, young one.” Their sire said to Sentinel.

“NWO!”

Oh boy. Not even grown and he’s already defying him. Sentinel kept saying “no” as he was hoisted up by his sire. At this point, the meeting would have to be postponed until he brought them back to the daycare.

That wasn’t the plan. Whenever he got close to the door, all three sparklings’ screamed their helms off. Ultra Magnus would step back and they would cease. Step closer. More screaming. Step back. It stopped.

Looks like three more bots joined the meeting

——-————-—————————————————

PLEASE FOLLOW ASK-THE-SPARKLING-SIBLINGS-AU! They are the inspiration for this fic!

[bloody-wonder]

Hi...... If you don't mind me asking, what are your top 10 favorite books ever (fiction)? And why do you love them? Sorry if you've answered this question before....Thanks...

no i don’t think i have answered that before🤔 

thanks for asking! :D this is in loose most to least favorite order let's goooo

1. the lymond chronicles by dorothy dunnett. let’s get the enfant terrible out of the way. i love historical adventure stories and have a fictional crush on the mc of proportions embarrassing at my respectable old age. a gallant renaissance courtier, a cunning swashbuckler, a brilliant schemer, a queer icon, a tortured soul, a secret agent extraordinaire “whose tongue is as sharp as his rapier”, the Man, the Myth, the Legend - lymond has it all. if only i could condone the narrative tomfoolery of the last two installments, the lemon saga would’ve become my favorite series of all time. still gotta put it in the first spot bc rn i’m biased - i’m re-reading it with my bestie and hell’s own apollo is very much there, inside my mind💖

2. the secret history by donna tartt is the book that established dark academia - a lucrative subgenre of mediocre campus novels trying to imitate tsh written by authors who unfortunately don’t understand what makes it iconic. the secret special ingredient being some substance under the aesthetics and - how do i put it without sounding like a snob - literary value. this is not the main reason why i love it though, not the thing that made me binge it overnight several years ago which was how i found my way back into reading after uni drained me of any desire to do it - those were the characters. i think they’re fun and relatable in terms of qualities which i’m not necessarily proud of but which are nevertheless an integral part of my personality - such as, for example, being a snob.

3. all for the game by nora sakavic is probably the most unique book i have ever read - and that’s saying something bc i read over one hundred per year. do i dare to attempt to explain what it is about in a concise manner? no, i don’t think so. i’ll just say i love it bc it showed me what can be achieved if the author isn’t constrained by arbitrary rules of storytelling or social conventions or judgements of “good taste”, bc it inspired me to actively participate in an online fandom for the first time and to build a community of tumblr mutuals (which tbh was probably the only thing that helped me stay sane throughout 2020), bc it made so many memories and experiences click into place and made me realize i’m aroace and queer. i’m glad i discovered it at the right time in my life and i genuinely believe it’s in its rightful place next to the more “highbrow” books on this list.

4. harry potter. unlike many fans i read hp relatively late in my teens and so i don’t think i could say i’d grown up with it or that it had been an important part of my childhood. nevertheless when i read this series it captured my heart and soul and it never lost its charm on each subsequent re-read. now jkr is being rightfully condemned and the story itself viewed with increasing criticism, but still i can’t agree with people who claim it was never good in the first place. something is very special about hp, something contemporary authors apparently can’t recreate or another middle grade or ya fantasy would’ve overshadowed it by now. i used to think this special thing can’t be tainted by the discourse but to tell the truth now i’m not so certain anymore. maybe i’m just becoming more and more disillusioned with the idea of escaping from real life problems into magical fictional worlds... watch starkid’s a very potter musical on youtube if you haven’t already btw.

5. confusion by stefan zweig is a novella written in the 1920s and it follows a relationship between a young university student and his mysterious english professor who has a dark secret. this is probably (and unfortunately) the least famous book on this list and so i have made it my mission to recommend it to people as often as possible. zweig is a wonderful writer who focuses on deep dives into the characters’ psyche and interpersonal relationships that can’t be easily defined or put into boxes. i can’t really explain why this obscure short story is in my top 5 favorite books of all time without going into spoilers but i will say that i myself fully understood why it’s so important to me only after i realized i’m aroace. it doesn’t have any aroace characters - that would’ve been too galaxybrain for the time period - but the questions the protag grapples with in the story are in my opinion some quintessential aspec questions which i sadly haven’t seen explored in any aspec rep book i’ve read so far. 

6. eugene onegin by alexander pushkin. despite its immense fame and popularity in russia and all the lands it colonized, some western readers might not be familiar with this classic - i assume because it’s written in verse and so even the best translator wouldn’t be able to render this text in all its glory. i have re-read onegin countless times, far more often than any other book on this list, and each time it presented itself from a new angle: as a 12yo i thought it was a failed love story, as a 20yo i thought it was a failed friendship story and now, that i’m the same age as onegin at the end of the book, my conclusion is it’s about how some people just can’t be happy. how very byronic lol

7. a song of ice and fire by george rr martin. i used to believe this is the superior adult fantasy series bc of its complex and compelling characters - but that doesn’t seem right bc many authors offer good character work. what actually sets asoiaf apart imo is what i call “complex morality” - this is basically grey morality except as applied to the world instead of, as it commonly is, to the characters. a “morally grey character” is, especially today, a pretty uninspired narrative tool if they exist in a world where good and evil are real and absolute categories. despite the fact that many readers (but mostly, i think, the show viewers) have divided the asoiaf cast into the “good” ones, the “bad” ones and the “redeemable” ones (ugh), i believe martin succeeded in creating a world where each character will inevitably end up on the crossroads between a bad action and a worse one and their choice will be a juicy insight into the conditio humana. for some reason i like when the fiction i read for escapism reflects my cynical pessimist outlook🤷‍♂️  

8. the three musketeers by alexandre dumas. the og historical swashbuckling adventure story, the first book (series) i was ever obsessed with. can’t say much about this one bc i read it when i was 12 and haven’t re-read it since, my love for it being kept alive throughout the years by the soviet tv adaptation. i really want to re-read it soon but also i’m nervous that it won’t live up to my childhood memories. still had to put it on the list bc in many aspects it was foundational to my tastes in media and fiction.

9. the talented mr ripley by patricia highsmith. before the secret history dethroned it by offering similar themes in a more attractive package, this used to be my favorite book. no one can write a queercoded sociopath like highsmith. i remember finishing the book, then starting it again immediately bc i was just fascinated by ripley’s mind, by how subtle the writing was and how it managed to convey a sense of constant anxiety and tension. i think tom ripley is an important figure in the fictional serial killer canon and deserves more attention from fans of guys like hannibal lecter and joe goldberg. hopefully the upcoming mini-series will do him justice - as in “faithfully depict and popularize his story”. real justice being done to him is the last thing ripley wants lol 

10. a little life by hanya yanagihara. a very important novel whose broad thematic range is overshadowed by the notoriety it gets in the online book community bc of its heavy subject matter. this book wants you to witness the darkest moments of one man’s life, follow him on this tragic journey and see how the society that means to help often ends up harming further bc it fails to acknowledge many uncomfortable truths about individual mental health. honestly i could spend hours talking about all the subversive and taboo topics this book explores and why it’s important and why it’s bad that we don’t engage with them more often, but if i had to pick one it would be the idea that some of us will only get a little life to enjoy and that is okay and our experience is still worth recounting and witnessing, it’s still valuable and liberating even if it doesn’t fit into the common understanding of “happiness” which anyway is nothing but a construct that can seem misleading and oppressive depending on one’s experiences. ngl i couldn’t in good conscience “recommend” this book to anyone, as in “suggest they read it”, but i think i personally will revisit it at different stages in my life bc i’m sure it will reveal new depths. and also bc, as you should’ve gathered from this list, i like pain😅😬

other books i consider my all time favorites that didn’t make the list: the hunchback of notre dame, wuthering heights, phantom by susan kay, perfume: the story of a murderer, gentlemen and players by joanne harris, howl’s moving castle, captive prince, the grandmaster of demonic cultivation (mo dao zu shi), the history boys, crime and punishment

[mayihavethisdanse]

“What is this, the Dark Ages?”

Or, Arthurian themes and allusions in the Brotherhood of Steel mythos as seen in Fallout 4. (But that’s a lot of words.)

Yep. We're doing this. 

First, some obligatory caveats: there is no single Arthurian canon, just 1500 years of assorted fanfic based on the whims of whoever was writing at the time. For this extremely highbrow Tumblr meta, I have ignored most of it and drawn on my favorites. Also Wikipedia.

Also, I am not an expert in Arthurian literature (or Fallout lore, come to that), and I preemptively beg the pardon of anyone who is.

Finally, in no way am I claiming that all these parallels and thematic echoes are deliberate or even significant. In fact, I'd break it down into:

Clearly deliberate allusions, whether in or out of universe;

Probably coincidence, but could be someone deliberately capitalizing on a coincidental similarity;

Almost certainly coincidence, but fun to speculate about; annnnd

Blatant Monty Python references. (Because of course there are.)

I'll start with the big one.

Arthur Maxson, boy king and unifier

(source)

So across all the retellings and variations of King Arthur’s life story, there are a few consistent elements, particularly in his early life and rise to power. Some of these threads are echoed in the Fallout universe, specifically (and unsurprisingly) in the person of Arthur Maxson.

Both the legendary King Arthur and Arthur Maxson were born with a claim to power lying in their ancestry, both were fostered away from their families, and both proved themselves in combat at a young age. 

King Arthur united the warring kingdoms of Britain into a single entity, making them stronger against outsiders and receiving general admiration and acclaim. Arthur Maxson united the divided factions of the BoS after the events of Fallout 3 and is held in similarly high regard by his men.

The name Prydwen is a reference to the ship of the original King Arthur. Presumably, Arthur Maxson (or someone in the BoS who anticipated his promotion) christened the airship in a deliberate homage to the Arthurian myth.

King Arthur is associated with his legendary sword. I think it’s notable that Maxson’s legend is associated with a bladed weapon, too. ("He killed a DEATHCLAW with a COMBAT KNIFE!”)

Probably coincidence, but fun: the historical emperor Magnus Maximus, who pops up a lot in early Arthurian legend, was known in Welsh as... Macsen. (⌐■_■)

Round Table, but make it dieselpunk

(Continued under the cut.)

Moving away from obvious allusions and into some looser parallels:

Like the Round Table, the Brotherhood is an exclusive knightly order with its leader being the one able to open it up to his chosen few.

Like the Round Table, the BoS sees itself as defending human civilization against forces of chaos. (I’ll touch on their tech-hoarding tendencies when I get to the Grail stuff.) This idea of civilization in the face of chaos goes back to the BoS’s founding, even though the level of isolationism we see in most of the Fallout franchise is not exactly what founder Roger Maxson had in mind: “Notably, Maxson's ultimate intention was to establish the Brotherhood as an organization that works closely with people outside of the Brotherhood, as guardians of civilizations, not its gatekeepers.” (source) In a lot of ways, Arthur Maxson represents a return to his ancestor’s original ideals.

Renegade knights? Internal politics? Traitors within? We gotchu.

In both the medieval legends and in all chapters of the BoS we’ve seen, there’s a big focus on bloodlines (ew). Ironically, it’s probably Arthur Maxson’s unquestionable ancestry that allows him to be more progressive than either of his East Coast predecessors when it comes to boosting Brotherhood numbers by recruitment (even though you can still see a clear division between “born Brotherhood” and recruited soldiers, but that’s a topic for another day). Maxson sees himself as an Elder who "cares for the people"—however misguided and patronizing that attitude might be—and whatever else you might say about the guy, you can't say he doesn't believe he has a duty. Which brings us to…

Know Your Enemy: Danse as Gawain

Before I start this section, an acknowledgement of authorial bias:

Gawain, as portrayed in the Middle English poem Sir Gawain and the Green Knight, is my very favorite of King Arthur’s knights. (Other stories aren't always as flattering, but like I said at the outset: I'm sticking to the ones I like.)

That poem is my very favorite piece of medieval Arthurian literature. In this section, I'll refer to the modern English translation by Simon Armitage.

...that’s it, I have no other biases to disclose. 

What? 👀

(Art: Clive Hicks-Jenkins)

All right. So in Sir Gawain and the Green Knight, you’ve got this himbo loyal knight of Arthur’s who finds himself caught up in... you know what, let me just paste in the Wikipedia summary. (The Toast, RIP, also did a pretty entertaining and more-or-less accurate recap.)

It describes how Sir Gawain, a knight of King Arthur's Round Table, accepts a challenge from a mysterious "Green Knight" who dares any knight to strike him with his axe if he will take a return blow in a year and a day. Gawain accepts and beheads him with his blow, at which the Green Knight stands up, picks up his head and reminds Gawain of the appointed time. In his struggles to keep his bargain, Gawain demonstrates chivalry and loyalty until his honour is called into question by a test involving the lord and the lady of the castle where he is a guest.

Don’t worry too much about the plot details, though; for this post, I’m more interested in the thematic parallels. The Green Knight story is full of contrasts: order vs. chaos, civilization vs. wilderness, mortal man vs. Other... but let’s start with Gawain himself. 

Some stuff to know about Gawain:

He was "as good as the purest gold, devoid of vices but virtuous and loyal". Gawain took his principles more seriously even than the rest of Arthur’s knights, not out of pride but out of humility: "I would rather drop dead than default from duty," he says. 

He’s faithful and honorable and never even tempted to betray an oath, even when offered every variety of seduction and riches, except for a single moment of weakness in a desperate desire not to be executed for random shit by powerful forces for reasons he doesn't understand.  

Even though he doesn’t really understand why he needs to die, he sticks to his oath. Gawain's one weakness is a moment of desperate, private, human desire for survival. He'll submit to the headsman’s axe if he has to, but he'd still rather live. 

Above all, Gawain is the ideal of a human man: he might be the bravest and loyal man there is, but he’s still fundamentally human.

You can probably see where I'm going with this.

A few more fun facts about Gawain that resonate with Paladin Danse’s story:

He’s got a bunch of really shitty brothers. (No comment.)

Gawain (SPOILERS!) doesn't actually end up beheaded, but he does willingly kneel for his execution and gets a cut on the throat as a reminder of his sin. And, uh, Danse can also get his throat cut! It doesn’t end as nicely but it’s, you know, a thing that can happen.

Gawain might be a really good guy, and he tries really hard to be one, but in the end he’s nothing more than that: there’s nothing supernatural about him, he has no special powers beyond his own principles and devotion. He’s just a dude doing his Best. 

Wait, why not Danselot?

Oh, that guy? Here’s the thing.

Lancelot personifies the continental ideals of courtly love that became popular in the High Middle Ages. Central to his story is the prioritization of personal relationships and romantic feelings in a way that you don’t really see in Gawain's, at least in the Green Knight tale. (Later stories hook Gawain up with an extremely delightful lady, but even that is a different flavor of romance than Lancelot's and has more to do with Gawain honoring his word and his egalitarian treatment of women (hell yeah). In the poem, Gawain is impressed by Bertilak's wife but resists her temptation; in fact, the biggest risk is not that he'll yield to her advances but that he'll be discourteous to her, i.e., violate his principles and cause dishonor to his king and his host.)

Lancelot is driven by passions over principles in a way that Gawain never really is (at least in the stories I’m talking about; later writers have committed character assassination to various degrees). Yes, you could argue that both Gawain and Lancelot betray their oaths, but Lancelot’s betrayal is never, um, blind. He knows what he’s doing and makes a deliberate choice to prioritize his love for the queen over his love for the king. It doesn’t make him a bad guy—he too is an ideal knight with one fatal flaw—but his character isn’t as comparable to Paladin Danse. 

Yeah, Gawain is (in most stories) a prince and a kinsman of Arthur’s, but he’s ultimately a native boy who doesn’t break the mold of a Knight of the Round Table. Likewise, Danse is portrayed as competent and valuable to the BoS, but not exceptional or breaking the mold of what a BoS soldier should be: he simply represents the ideal. Meanwhile, Lancelot is a foreign prince who was marked from childhood as special and fancy, and his storyline goes alllll over the place. (Much like this post.)

For example, Lancelot goes to absolutely absurd extremes to prove his devotion for no other reason than to prove it. (“I’ll do any useless humiliating thing you want. I’ll betray every oath except the one I made to you. That’s what love is!”) Gawain would never. Danse would never.

Ultimately, Gawain's tests are of his character and not of his love. And like Gawain, Danse’s devotion is to service and his principles, not to another person—even Arthur Maxson.

All that said, there are some similarities: both are beloved by Arthur, both are held up as the ideal of what a knight should be. And even if their fatal flaws are different, both make the point that no matter how good and brave and loyal they might be, no human being can be perfect. 

(Except Galahad. Who is, as a result, very boring.) 

I’ll conclude this section with a quote from someone else’s take on the Greek Knight poem:

I like Gawain. He’s not perfect, but he’s trying his best which is all any of us can do. He’s not like the other knights in the Arthurian legends who occasionally ‘accidentally’ kill women on their little adventures and then feel hard done by when they have to deal with the consequences of that. Gawain holds himself to a high standard – higher, it seems, than Arthur and his knights hold him to considering how hard they laugh when Gawain tells them how bad he feels about the whole thing.

I think Gawain is very relatable in this story. We all want to be better than we actually are.

And that, more than anything else, is Danse.

The Grail myth

What’s that? Lost relics of power? Better send some large armed men after ‘em!

The parallels to the BoS’s tech-hoarding ways are obvious enough that the games themselves lampshade them (albeit by way of Monty Python). But it also ties into the larger themes of “purity” versus “corruption” and the BoS’s self-image as a bastion between civilization and chaos. (See Maxson's line in response to the Sole Survivor’s quip about the Dark Ages: “Judging from the state of the world, it wouldn't be a stretch to say we're living in that era again.”)

But the ultimate futility of the Grail mission is also worthy of note. The BoS might want the power of prewar tech on their side, but they’re no more to be trusted with it than any other group of human beings. No matter how they try, the “corruption” of humanity can’t be overcome as long as they’re striving to harness power for their own ends. You can only achieve power by surrendering control of it.

The death of Arthur

The nature of gameplay being what it is, it's not guaranteed that the Arthur figure will be fatally betrayed, bringing Camelot down with him—but it's not unlikely, either.

Awkward.

Some final spitballing:

Outside the Brotherhood, there are some fun parallels of the Arthur myth with the rest of Fallout 4. Betrayal by one’s own son, for example.

The key difference between the BoS and the legendary Round Table: King Arthur’s knights, for all their flaws and human weaknesses, are usually presented as unambiguous Good Guys. The BoS is... a little more ambiguous...

...but damn if they don’t think they're the good guys. 

A-ad victoriam, fellas!

[morlock-holmes]

i suppose in some kind of cruel and twisted way that prageru graph about art/standards declining was right, if only for entirely different reasons (capitalism, as opposed to like, minorities existing or whatever as the culprit - and mainstream/social media as the medium for the decay instead of thoughtful art installations)

That's the common problem with right wing culture warriors like the folks at Prager U, isn't it? They attribute things to vague forces like "culture" even when there are extremely clear economic incentives involved.

I'm not familiar with the graph you're talking about so I had to look it up. It's a bit silly, isn't it? I've definitely been talking way too broadly, so I'll say that I'm a fairly big fan of movies, and that's where my thinking lives. I'm not able to argue about whether movies as a whole are getting better or worse, but I do think it can be argued very persuasively that the kind of auteurist cinema that film snobs value is made far less often than it used to be. Brett Heinz has helpfully lays out the problems with Disney's film monopoly here, and notice that the argument doesn't rely on abstract or subjective criteria like whether or not films have decreased in quality:

Disney shows some signs of producing more output now that they’ve acquired Fox, planning to release 18 movies next year (though this number is likely to be lowered as some films are shelved or pushed back). But of those, at most half appear to be original scripts or new films based on books, while the other half consists of remakes, sequels, spin-offs, Marvel movies, and one tie-in to boost the profitability of a Disneyland attraction. Looking back at 2000, sequels and re-issues made up less than a quarter of the 21 films Disney released. Welcome to Monopoly Disney.

The Disney corporation, and the other big six, have been consolidating; they make fewer movies per year than they did 25 years ago. In the case of Disney, more and more of those movies are sequels and attempts to keep milking various IPs.

It's very well known now that the Marvel movies, or the Star Wars movies are not really made in an auteurist fashion; chunks of several movies are made at once and then the pieces are distributed based on constantly updating thoughts about what audiences want.

The Star Wars sequel trilogy very famously had no plan behind it, there's no coherent artistic intent from those movies and they were made in a way that prevented that kind of thing.

If you are a fan of daring auteurist cinema, Hollywood caters to you probably less than it ever has and as Brett has also pointed out, the monopolies in film and theater ownership means that this effects what you can watch.

In these conditions, I am extremely skeptical of the potential for the cultural boundaries that separated highbrow and lowbrow film to continue to exist; with fewer "high brow" films being made for less money and shown at fewer theaters there's literally less to be a snob about. There is less auteurist cinema being made at the same time that the distinction between high, middle and lowbrow art in general is declining, so I don't see how film snobbery can continue to really exist as an actual general social sorting heuristic.

Again, going back to that business suit analogy: You might know that morning dress is the most formal dress, but here in the US literally nobody will ask you to wear it. Hell, even the suit and tie is becoming more and more the symbol of the stuffy and out of touch.

Yes, lawyers going to court you probably need to wear one, but if the bosses at your company make eight figures and come to the office in shorts and flip flops then it's pretty bizarre for you to be complaining about all the corporate squares who force their employees to wear ties if they want to get promoted.

[ariel-seagull-wings]

TOP 12 WICKED QUEEN PORTRAYALS

@sunlit-music​ @mademoiselle-princesse​ @princesssarisa​ @superkingofpriderock​ @metropolitan-mutant-of-ark​ @amalthea9​ @theancientvaleofsoulmaking​ @astrangechoiceoffavourites​ @giuliettaluce​ 

Alongside the Big Bad Wolf, Cinderella’s Stepmother, The Giant from Jack and The Beanstalk, The Witch from Hansel and Gretel and Bluebeard, The Wicked Queen from Snow White is one of the most iconic fairy tale villains of all time. A lot of people come to consider her the real protagonist of the fairy tale, since is her desire to be considered the Fairest of All and her actions to keep that title what puts the narrative in motion. And today, i will rank my favorite portrayals of this fascinatingly nasty foe.

12º Miranda Richardson as Queen Elspeth in Snow White: The Fairest of Them All (2001)

Talk about being typecast: before that turn as Snow White’s Evil Queen, Richardson had portrayed an Evil Sorceress Queen and Stepmother in Jim Henson’s The Storyteller (’The Three Ravens’ episode) and she was a wicked Sorceress Stepmother in Tim Burton’s Sleep Hollow. So it was neat for her to be called for the role of the most famous Evil Sorceress Queen and Stepmother in this Hallmark TV Movie. Elspeth is the sister of a strange, mysteryous creature known as the Granter of Wishes. Having been recently released from his freezing prison, the Granter of Wishes makes a spell to make her look beautifull for human standards, and marries her to the newly crowned and widowed King John. At first she looks content with the prospect, but as time passes, she grows more and more unsatisfied. Her source of joy is the Magic Mirror that praises her beauty, and casting spells to turn gnomes into garden statues. But when the Magic Mirror says that Snow White’s beauty surpasses hers, the unsatisfaction gets mixed with paranoia, and Elspeth slowly abuses her power in constantly harming other people, until there is no magic enough...

11º Herta Kravina in Schneewitchen (1971)

This german TV Movie is the most faithfull adaptation of the Grimm’s tale original edition, not only keeping the three murder attempts by ribbon/lace/corset, hair comb and apple, but also being the only one to show the Queen dancing to death with hot iron shoes in Snow White’s wedding. This is enough to make it worth a checkout. The other reason i find this version interesting is how the Queen comunicates with the Magic Mirror: they sing to each other. And Kravina has a really good voice (no wonder she was a voice actress for Peggy Lee in the first german/dutch dub of Disney’s Lady and The Tramp). Sometimes that is enough to get a spot in a ranking.

10º Mari Yokoo/Caterina Rochiara/Regina Reagan/Carol Jacobanis as Queen Crystal in The Legend of Snow White (1994)

From the outside, Queen Chrystal appears to be calm, regal, and sophisticated, but in reality, this collected and stately facade hides an extremely sadistic, hateful, cold and sinister person. She is ruthless, jealous and obsessive and wants nothing more than to be the fairest in the land. She also has an extreme vanity that made her utterly intolerant of rivals. Being solely focused on the idea of becoming the fairest of all, Queen Chrystal does not appear to be significantly involved in governing her husband's kingdom, though the skeletal remains of prisoners in her dungeon point to her being a villainous ruler. In the end, her mad vanity and jealousy of her stepdaughter Snow White drove her to murderous insanity. Later is revealed that Queen Chrystal is not unredeamably evil as everyone thins, but an actually kind and gentle person who is possessed by an Evil Spirit. 

09º Diana Rigg as the Queen in Canon Movie Tales: Snow White (1987)

This lady is the personification of paranoia multiplied by the double. Why? Because the Magic Mirror didn’t needed to say that the little child Snow White was the fairest, this queen just feared so much that the princess’s beauty would outgrow hers that she ordered the huntsman to kill her. Basically: run, she is bad news.

08º Jeri Arredondo as Sly Fox in Happily Ever After: Fairy Tales For Every Child (1995)

Sly Fox... What a cunning diva. People try to counsel to not use alone a Magic Mirror that is a portal to the spirit world, but who says she listens? She is just there to hear the singing of her praises, and will try to eliminate anyone who gets on her way. She even goes so far as taking the appearance of the kind hearted nurse Sage Flower to lure her stepdaughter White Snow to eat the poisoned appled. What is not to love about that bastard?

07º Kazue Komiya/Arlene Banas as the Queen in Grimm’s Fairy Tale Classics (1989)

Interestingly this encarnation starts naturally cold, calm and collected, ocasionally at the princess Snow White to see if she can ever grow more beautifull than her, and dismissing the girl with contempt. It is years later that she lets go of acting calm and collected, because after hearing some gossips in the palace, she asks Snow White if she thinks of herself as more beautifull than the Queen, and her stepdaughter reacts by exclaiming that the Queen is vain and cruel, and to her eyes that makes her ugly. So besides the desire of being considered the most beautifull, you get the feeling that this Queen pursues Snow White as a way to shut a person that dares to rebell against her, wich ads new interesting dimentions to their antagonism.

06º Dorothy Cumming as Queen Brangomar in Snow White (1916)

Brangomar was once a lady in waiting of the palace. But one day, she met the powerfull Witch Rex, who offered to give Brangomar anything she wanted. And what Brangomar wanted was to become a beautifull Queen. Wich was achieved by a faustian deal where Witch Rex would cast a spell that killed Imogene, the previous Queen, while in return Brangomar would have to find a way of getting Snow White’s heart for the Witch. Years have passed, and now Brangomar  must kill the princess to pay her debt, or else everything she got will be lost. Hey, here is a way of making a villain tragic, almost simpathetic and complex while keeping clear that she is still a villain!

05º Vanessa Redgrave as the Queen in Faerie Tale Theatre (1984)

The most loud and bombastic portrayal of the Wicked Queen ever put on screen. Bringing to television her sperience from stage, that allows some more over the top emotional reactions, Redgrave had the time of her life in that role, indulging in twirling, preening and screening as much as she could, and his Queen is all the most fun for it.

04º Gudrun Landgrebe as the Queen in Schneewittchen (1992)

What i live about Landgrebe’s Queen is her range: at first she acts all humble, discreet, cold and mysteryous. Then her husband leaves to fight in a Crusade, and she trows the white veil and gray clothing of humility to show a diva red hair and orange dress, as to say “Hey, the King leaved, i have all the power here now and you must do as i say”. Later, a knight comes, offering a magical crystal ball that connected to a mirror says all the truth, and the Queen takes posession of it to ask about her beauty. When Mirror says that the most beautifull woman in the kingdom is Snow White, she gets infuriated, than goes to carefully plan ways to eliminate the princess once and for all. The highlight is when she takes the disguise of a russian male doctor to offer the apple (where she injects poison into with her ring) to Snow White.

03º Maria Antonieta de Las Nieves in El Chapulin Colorado: Blancanieves y los Siete Churín Churín Fun Flais (1978)

This three part episode of the mexican comedy superheroe show is a loving parody of the Disney version, that stands out as an enjoyable retelling of the classic fairy tale in its own right. Interestingly, while most of the comedy in the episode is delivered in the form of over the top slapistick, de Las Nieves’s delivers a straight faced, contained performance. Wich makes her answers to the absurd situations in the story all the more funny.

02º Patricia Medina as the Queen in Snow White And The Three Stooges (1961)

This lady was a hell of a foe: she not only antagonizes Snow White for the title of the Most Beautifull, going so far as to lock the princess in a dungeon for no crime at all, but also, alongside her partner in crime Count Oga, ordered a murder attempt aggainst Prince Charming when he was a child, to prevent him from marrying Snow White, and this way she could become ruller of the kingdoms of Fortunia and Bravuria. Troughout the film, you think that she could win, since she has powerfull magic, spy and a mighty army at her comand, wich makes the viewer get all the more excited on the seat, that is how enjoyable Medina’s Queen is.

And my Number One Portrayal of the Wicked Queen is...

01º Lucille La Verne as the Queen in Disney’s Snow White and The Seven Dwarfs (1937)

The first encarnation of the character that i ever saw in my childhood, and the one that still sends chills/shivers to my spine. As a young Queen, she rarely smiles, acting cold and calculating, intidimidating who is subordinate to her with the expression of her eyes and highbrows. And as a Crone, she lowdly indulges in her cruelty, offering the poisoned apple to her pet raven to scare him, and mocking the dead skeleton of a prisoner inside the castle’s dungeons. That balance between cold calculism and loud cruelty, where both are equally unsetling and scary, is something very hard to achieve, but i think this encarnation did a very good job in achieving that balance, that every other  portrayal that camed tried to draw influence from it ever since. And that’s why Disney’s Wicked Queen is my Number One portrayal.

HONORABLE MENTIONS: Addi Adamets in Schneewittchen (1955), Marianne Christina Schiling in Schneewittchen (1961) and Sonja Kirchberger in Sechs Auf Einen Streich (2009)

[go-redgirl]

Ron Johnson, Mitt Romney, Donald Trump and Joe Biden Photo illustration by Salon/Getty Images

People tend to think of "activists" as left-wingers who march in the streets against wars or organize rallies for civil rights and social justice. And there is a great tradition in America and around the world for such liberal activism. But it's not just the left that has an activist tradition. The right has one too — and it's often extremely effective.

In the post-WWII years, the right in the U.S. was focused on anti-communism and far-right groups like the John Birch Society attracted middle-class men and women to join clubs and meet to discuss how to fight the onslaught from inside their suburban cul de sacs. In the New Republic some years back, historian Rick Perlstein recounted a hilarious quote from a Dallas housewife in Time Magazine in 1961 saying, "I just don't have time for anything. I'm fighting Communism three nights a week." From the Goldwater campaign in 1964 on, right-wing activists focused much of their energy on getting Republicans elected to office, from school boards to the presidency, and were quite successful at it.

The right-wing grassroots has always organized itself around the idea that they are under siege and unless they pull together to defend themselves, everything they value will be destroyed. Whether it was fighting communism, secularism, terrorism, civil rights or whatever social justice movement that was supposedly threatening their way of life, the right has always been convinced that they are in imminent danger. And when they find themselves at odds with their own fellow Americans, as they so often do, this sense of victimization and martyrdom is what fuels the culture war at the heart of their complaints. As Perlstein wrote in that 2006 piece:

Conservative culture itself is radically diverse, infinitely resourceful in uniting opposites: highbrow and lowbrow; sacred and profane; sublime and, of course, ridiculous. It is the core cultural dynamic--the constant staging and re-staging of acts of "courage" in the face of liberal "marginalization"--that manages to unite all the opposites. It keeps conservatives from one another's throats--and keeps them more or less always pulling in the same political direction.

Donald Trump, however, has upended that longstanding dynamic — and the party establishment has no idea what to do about it.

Igor Bobick of the Huffington Post recently reported that Republican officials are anxiously awaiting a resurgence of the Tea Party, which they have been expecting to reconstitute in the face of Joe Biden's ambitious agenda. It was, after all, a smashing success back in 2009 and 2010 in opposing President Barack Obama's health care plan. You'd certainly assume that they'd be getting the band back together. But so far, it isn't happening. And there's a reason for it: people like what they are seeing.

Bobic quotes deficit hawk Republican Sen. Mike Braun saying, "even my counties back in Indiana are happy, which is a very conservative area. They're asking, 'How can I spend $15 million in a rural county?'" Braun ruefully admits that Biden's agenda is a smart political move and he's right. Biden and the Democrats are betting that people are hungry for some positive government action and they are determined to deliver it.

But there's more to it than that.

The Tea Party was a grassroots movement but it was also heavily subsidized by some of the wealthiest activists in the country. The Koch brothers' operation and other wealthy interests spent quite a bit of money to make the Tea Party a reality because their libertarian ideology really was on the line. But when you think about it, it was a bizarre set of issues for grassroots activists who usually organize themselves around a sense of victimization. And it didn't really fit their usual modus operandi. The "threat" was a total abstraction. How were they "victims" of other people getting health care?

Sure, the right has always opposed government programs if it would benefit those they believe don't deserve them (and I think you know who those people might be). But the outrage against Obamacare was really all about Obama. They had to sublimate their racist backlash into something and that was on the menu but the war the Tea Party was really fighting was against the election of America's first Black president.

Yet some Republicans in Congress are still operating under the illusion that their voters really did care about deficits and will be moved to protest despite the fact that they still adore Donald Trump, a man who didn't care about any of that. In fact, right-wing grassroots activists are already engaged in a battle that is far more energizing and interesting to them than any of that egghead economic stuff ever was: Donald Trump's Big Lie.

According to a new CNN poll, 70% of Republicans believe the election was stolen. And they are taking action. We all know about the flurry of restrictive voting laws that are quickly being enacted all over the country and the preposterous "audit" taking place down in Arizona by a bunch of Trump fanatics and conspiracy theorists is probably just the beginning. The explosion of GOP grassroots activity in the states isn't just about Joe Biden or the events happening in Washington. They are also working night and day to punish Republicans who dared to disagree with Trump's version of events and ensure that Trump will be able to win the next election.

The Washington Post took a look at some of the grassroots action taking place around the country. They interviewed one Michigan organizer who is trying to censure and remove a Republican Party executive who accepted the results of the election. She said, "I think I speak for many people in that Trump has never actually been wrong, and so we've learned to trust when he says something, that he's not just going to spew something out there that's wrong and not verified." That sort of cultish delusion is forcing official rebukes and purges of Trump apostates all across the country.

The motion to censure the former GOP presidential nominee failed 711-798, which I'm sure softened the humiliating blow. But it's bubbling up to Washington as well. The House GOP caucus thought they had successfully managed the "Liz Cheney problem" but it's coming back. Axios reported that there may be another vote to remove her and from the behavior of the leadership, it seems as though the worm has turned, no doubt because these Representatives are getting an earful from their activist base. The party is now eating its own.

Republicans counting on the Tea Party zombie to rise again had better come up with a Plan B. The activists the GOP in Washington wants to organize against Joe Biden's program are already booked. They're busy fighting other Republicans three nights a week.  

[airiat]

44, 55 and 65 for the OC asks? :D

I’ll answer for my 3 OC’s Fjoara, Morvera, and Vesta!

44. What are some things that greatly upset your OC?

Fjoara: She gets really distraught at needless violence/death as she is really more of a pacifist. She carries a weapon and knows harmful spells, yes, but self-defense is necessary sometimes, especially in a place like Skyrim. She’s gotten pretty good at compartmentalizing—it’s easy for her to kill the cultists on Solstheim because they all wear masks and are hostile, for example—but I don’t think that she’ll ever really feel comfortable with killing. Non-fatal incapacitation is probably gonna end up being her thing.

Morvera: Restriction of freedom and independence. Rules, guidelines, social conventions, expectations, etc. She just wants to live her life the way she wants and do whatever she wants (honestly, not always to the best end for both her and those involved) and how dare anyone ever try to tell her differently. Her reaction to any kind of loss of freedom can be a bit rash sometimes, so while it isn’t always that big of a deal, she makes it into a huge deal. If I end up putting her in LMNIT, I’ll have to raise the stakes for her/create some major incentive to make her want to be one of Fjoara’s followers. Otherwise, she’d never consider such a path.

Vesta: I think injustice is going to be a big thing for her. I don’t know too terribly much about Oblivion yet in order to say specifically how this will manifest, but I can definitely see her as someone who will campaign for a marginalized group or some other societal issue. Mistreatment or unfairness upsets her deeply, in general. Unlike Morvera, though, she’s got a much better handle on her emotions (and also that Morvera usually doesn’t really give a shit about most others). And unlike Fjoara who’s more highbrow and will mingle with powerful people in order to incite change (which sometimes causes the wrong kind of change), Vesta is out there in the field trying to improve things as directly and with as much involvement as she can.

55. What are your OC’s thoughts on death?

Fjoara: To be honest, I kind of hc the Dragonborn having a bit of an extended lifespan, though still mortal. I can see Fjoara, as a human, living well into her 100s, but more than likely under her 200s. definitelydidnotthinkofthissothatsheandteldryncouldgrowreallyoldtogether Regardless, I don’t think Fjoara is too preoccupied with death initially, just hopes that she’ll go to Sovengarde when it does come. She’s too cautious and aware to get killed accidentally, and she knows this, barring any freak accidents. However, when her father is killed by Ulfric, her relationship with death will change and she’ll have a realization of the fragility of life. Eventually, she’ll outlive all of her friends and family which will be hard on her, but Teldryn will be around for the better part of her life, so she’ll find comfort in that.

Morvera: Live fast, die young is Morvera’s modus operandi. She’s all for reckless hedonism and welcomes death with open arms if she’s going out in a glorious way. Unless I decide to give her a bit of luck and make her die of natural causes, she probably will get killed pretty young in an accident or in combat. The latter is totally fine with her, though.

Vesta: She has an appreciation for death, but she doesn’t think about it too often. Even with her involvement in the Oblivion Crisis, she knows that if she were to die, she would be doing so for a good cause. She’s incredibly brave and courageous. She’s gonna be in for a hard time emotionally when Martin dies, but she also knows that it was a necessary sacrifice.

65. What is your OC’s favorite drink?

Fjoara: Loves a glass of stupidly expensive red wine, probably imported from the Imperial City. Can also get down with a pint of mead or a cup of tea, something floral and luxurious.

Morvera: Look, she says she doesn’t have a drinking problem, but she certainly has no qualms with indulging on a regular basis. Any Dumner spirit is preferable, but if it’s got alcohol, she’s not complaining.

Vesta: She’s only a social drinker, but even then, drinks very moderately. She likes sweet beverages like fruit juice or sweetened tea.

Thank you so much for asking! :))

[hellyeahrihannafenty]

The Totality: Rihanna | ELLE Magazine

Let’s just call Rihanna what she is: the coolest woman on the planet—with beauty, talent, attitude, and personal style to spare. Here, the global megastar answers questions from a cross-section of her famous fans.

Somewhere between releasing her debut single “Pon de Replay” (to blitzkrieg effect) in 2005 and sitting down to discuss international education with Emmanuel Macron in 2017, Rihanna has become much more than a pop star. The music is still absolutely vital, yes—her eighth album, Anti, which has been kicking up dust on the dance charts since it dropped last year, was deemed by Forbes to be one of the most successful recordings of all time—but as an icon, she represents something far greater: what a woman can achieve when she tackles her career, and her life, on her own terms. Rihanna is always fearlessly, unapologetically herself, whether she’s making maverick fashion choices on the red carpet, calling out body shamers, or adding yet another unmistakably RiRi-stamped endeavor to her string of (singer-actress-designer-entrepreneur-philanthropist-etcetera-etcetera) hyphenates. We can now add beauty mogul to that list.

The singer has poured her uncompromising attitude into a much-awaited makeup line, Fenty Beauty by Rihanna, poised to launch with a big bang of 91 products on September 8 at Sephora (expect lines) and on the brand’s website (Internet = broken). Its focus, perhaps surprisingly from a practiced maquillage peacock who has been known to rock vivid blue and ink-black lipstick with defiant flair, is gleaming, satiny, flawless skin, built around an assortment of user-friendly highlighting and contouring sticks, and a whopping 40 shades of foundation. “The biggest void I’ve found in the industry is the lack of variety in foundation shades,” Rihanna tells us. “That’s one of the things that was most important to me—to make sure everyone was included.” It’s a nod, too, to the complexion-perfecting gateway drug that ushered the Barbados native into beauty in the first place: “Foundation was the first product I ever owned,” she says. “It was like magic, and I’ve been in love with makeup ever since.”

Avidly hands-on throughout the collection’s development, Rihanna helmed everything from the playful name selection (there’s a gold powder highlighter, for instance, dubbed Trophy Wife) to the packaging, which, like its creator, is multifaceted, with tough, graffiti-inspired outer boxes opening onto sleek, streamlined, sweetly pretty individual products. “There are plenty of options out there when it comes to makeup,” Rihanna says. “My approach with Fenty Beauty was just to do things my way.”

19 QUESTIONS FOR RIHANNA, FROM 20 OF HER FRIENDS AND FANS

Tyra Banks, Model/Entrepreneur: You’re so successful and surrounded by people who want to please you. Who gives it to you straight?

Rihanna: For me, it’s my mama. They all fake, LOL, and fired!

Eminem, Rapper: You don’t seem like you’re ever thinking about trends when you go in the studio, yet you end up setting them. What are you looking at when you start your recording process?

Rihanna: I rarely know exactly what I want to do, but always know exactly how I want it to make me feel. Feeling always leads the sound!

Wyclef Jean, Rapper: The last time I saw you was at the World Cup. If you could be any football player in the world, who would it be?

Rihanna: Cristiano Ronaldo. But then again, Beckham did marry Posh Spice.

Laura Kim and Fernando Garcia, Designers, Oscar de la Renta: What’s your best vintage find?

Rihanna: On New Year’s Eve, 2016, I bought this costume from 1952 that was worn in the movie Singin' in the Rain.

“Rihanna is today’s most fascinating performer, a mysterious amalgam of amiable warmth and glittering charisma. With her keen creative eye for line and color, she has become a fashion icon, like Audrey Hepburn. Yet she is a tempestuous wild child and international adventuress, like Ava Gardner. Most importantly, as an artist in this overmechanized age, she bravely draws on deep wells of pure emotion, endearing her to millions of fans worldwide.” —Camille Paglia,Author/Critic

Tricky Stewart, Record Producer: Do you remember the first time a crowd gave you goose bumps singing all the lyrics to your song in concert?

  Rihanna:  Yes! I was on tour, and the whole crowd started singing “Take a Bow” word for word…to the point that I couldn’t even sing. They performed the entire song for me.

April Bloomfield, Chef: What do you cook when you want a little comfort?

Rihanna: Bajan macaroni pie, which is our version of a baked mac ’n’ cheese.

Zac Posen, Designer: What’s your secret family recipe?

R:It’s a secret! LOL. But they make a mean “cook-up” and pepper pot. Both are Guyanese recipes.

Jacquie Aiche, Jewelry Designer: What’s your favorite body part?

R: Well, my favorite body parts on pretty much any woman are the collarbone and shoulders.

Charli XCX, Singer/Songwriter: What’s your ultimate karaoke song?

R: Bon Jovi, “Livin’ on a Prayer”; Journey, “Don’t Stop Believin’ ”; Brandy and Monica, “The Boy Is Mine.”

"Rihanna brings ‘global gumbo’ to the culture. Her voice unites the world through positive music vibes." —Wyclef Jean, Rapper 

Danielle Steel, Best-Selling Author: I love your shoe passion, especially your collaboration with Manolo Blahnik. How much of the designing do they let you do?

R; They really give me all the creative freedom I could ask for, but of course I have this unique opportunity to work with Mr. Blahnik himself, so his expertise is always more than welcome!

Kelly Fields, Chef (Willa Jean, New Orleans): Your preferences in fashion and art appear to embrace the entire scale of highbrow/lowbrow—which is how I like to cook. I’d love to know if your preferences in munchies run along that same scale?

R: You mean KFC on a private jet is not normal?

Laverne Cox, Actress: You’ve had so many iconic fashion moments and take so many risks. The CFDA Awards Adam Selman dress in 2014—what gave you the courage to take that risk that was so perfect and elegant yet daring?

R: Dear Laverne, I took advantage of my titties before they go south. I saw my window, and I took it.

Pharrell Williams, Musician/Producer: You’re a pluralist in every sense of the word. Did you always have these dreams to do so many things, in addition to being an artist? Or have you just figured that out along the way that there are other things you can do very well?

R: I’ve always been a dreamer…or let’s just say I kept my options open. In my heart, I knew singing was gonna be in my future, but I considered psychology, hairdressing, banking, teaching, acting, modeling, aviation, and philanthropy. I just didn’t know I’d pretty much be doing all of these things eventually!

Gary Ross, Director, Ocean’s 8: What’s the first thing I should do when I get to Barbados?

R: [Fast-food] Chefette and a rum punch!

"I love Rihanna. I love that she is herself with no apologies. Her sense of style and self is unique. I love how she transforms herself with each album, each campaign. Always evolving. A true icon." —Venus Williams, Tennis Champion

David Copperfield, Magician: I’m not kidding, this is a real offer: I can make you disappear and reappear anywhere in the world. Where do you want to go, and why?

R: Ten minutes before I lost my virginity…and I’m holding you to that offer. LOL.

Emilio Vitolo, Restauranteur (Emilio's Ballato, New York City): What’s the name of the soup dish that’s the most popular in our region of Italy?

R: It’s my favorite on your menu...pasta e fagioli.

A$AP Rocky, Rapper: Tupac, Bob Marley, and Time: Fuck? Marry? Kill?

Shit, well, we stay killing Time. Fuck Tupac. Marry Bob, duh.

Olivia Wilde, Actress: What’s the most valuable mistake you’ve learned from?

No cheese for Jay Brown before a flight.

Patricia Field, Stylist: Would you consider having a cocktail with me sometime in the near future? I’d like to get to know you better. (Not hitting on you.)

Your place or mine?

"Rihanna’s MTV 2016 VMA performances were groundbreaking, paradigm- shifting moments in female swag. She represents badassery, positive self-esteem, and in a great way. She is powerful and vulnerable simultaneously, which makes her a revolutionary. Yes, she’s sexy, but once she’s got your attention, I don’t think you can ignore what she’s saying to you: She is curated and deliberate without feeling staged, and her intent is as real as anything out there. I respond to her as a writer, a woman, and a fan.” —Courtney Kemp, Showrunner/Creator, Power (Starz)

HERE, RIHANNA'S INSIGHT AS THE PROPRIETOR OF FENTY BEAUTY

ELLE: When did you first wear lipstick?

         Lipstick always got me in trouble. Whether it was at home as a kid, or my early teenage years in my career, I always had the urge to wear it. So I broke all those rules. Now lipstick is like my li’l secret weapon!

What is the craziest thing you’ve ever done/tried for beauty? Would you do it again?

         A corset! I’d do it again, though. I’d wear it every day if I could make it out alive!

What makes you feel dressy/“done,” beautywise?

         My finishing touch is usually my highlighter. I love highlighter—it just adds this sense of fantasy to any look.

"What is incredible about Rihanna is that in a world facing a deadening crisis of leadership and the constant negation of creative efforts, her music globally moves and inspires us to be completely alive without restrictions or prohibitions." —Richard Phillips, Artist

Of all the celebrities you’ve met, who smells the best?

         [Photographers] Inez and Vinoodh! Inez smells delicious. She actually gifted me her scent, because I always asked her about it.

Who’s your hair idol?

         This is probably confusing to most, but it’s in between Toni Braxton from back in the day with all her short haircuts…and Cindy Crawford. She had the most effortless yet stunning hair.

Who’s your makeup idol?

         I have to go with Veruschka. She made makeup look like silk!

This article originally appears in the October 2017 issue of ELLE. [Buy]

[spamzineglasgow]

(HOT TAKE) Quarantine Phenomenology: The Curious Case of Daddy Conte, by Denise Bonetti

‘Teenage by design’? SPAM founder and editor-in-chief Denise Bonetti, tapping into her Italian roots, takes us on a whirlwind journey around the lustful theme park that is meme space in the time of quarantine. For many, especially those who aren’t on the frontline as key workers, self-isolation is thrusting us back into a rude adolescence. Having exhausted our usual channels of recursive entertainment, where better to look than to the political (yes, wybi?!) heroes of meatspace to fantasise the intimacies and reassurances we’re otherwise deprived of. 

(CW: sexually explicit references)

> Comedian Dan Sebree tweeted that this whole quarantine situation is the closest any of us millennials will get to retirement. The joke is funny because it’s most likely true: the idea of people in my age bracket (mid-20s to mid-30s) ever retiring seems like a fairytale we tell ourselves to keep our boomer parents happy, something we play along to because frankly it’s easier than sharing the extent of our doubts in the future. (Find someone in their 20s who can say ‘when we all retire’ without a shred of irony).

> Sebree is right, most of us are playing retirees now. 80% of your salary to repot your plants, make sourdough, and fend off waves of existential dread here and there: not too shabby - if you used to have a stable job, that is. Things obviously aren’t so chill for quite literally everyone else: NHS workers, shopkeepers, supermarket employees, people on zero-hour contracts (which make up around 9% of all the UK workforce under 25), gig economy workers, freelancers by choice, people whose employers can’t be bothered putting them on payroll, and have therefore decided for them that they’ll have to be freelancers - the list goes on. 

> Yet beyond the retirement vibes, there is a stage of life that seems even more appropriate to represent the mood that this pandemic isolation has been creating. We are feeling manic and depressive, anxious and idyllic, bored and obsessive; we have been dying our hair and we’re allowing social media challenges and email chains to make a comeback ( 😩). We’re raging that we’re being told how & when we can go out, and we want to see our friends like our life depended on it. I hate to be the one to break it to you, but we’ve all gone back to being teenagers. (For some of us, the transformation is even more literal: everyone who’s had to move back to their parents tag yourselves.)

> In ‘Glitching the Collective Mind’ a three-part essay published on SPAM a few months ago, Dan Power noted how ‘spending too long online (or rather, too long outside of the real world)’ can easily give way to ‘feelings of melancholic or manic absurdity’ by way of ‘saturating the mind’ with the infinite possibilities of content. In the same essay, Power reflects on the nature of the virtual space this content is localised in, what Grafton Tanner has called the ‘virtual plaza’: a non-place through which ‘we drift and consume, lulled by the saccharine tones of muzak’. Power argues that what the ‘non-local’, ‘homogenized’ structure of the virtual plaza takes away is precisely that something around which the occupants can build a sense of identity: ‘When the features which distinguish one place from another are removed, stable sense of belonging and understanding are removed with them’. 

> Although Power could not have predicted this current weirdness, I am interested in his linking the internet’s hypertrophic, endless-scroll format, eradicated from any sense of place as we know it, to its capacity both to strip us of our identity, and to reduce us to a melancholic, manic mess - a passive, wide-awake anonymous content-consumer, lying in bed between waves of anxiety. A teenager who is grappling with their identity because they’re not quite sure where their emotions are coming from - literally and metaphorically.

> Critic Amanda Hess has recently written in The New York Times about the comfort of playing childhood video games during the lockdown. ‘It’s not so much that I miss my childhood’, she writes as she becomes re-obsessed with her 11-year-old self’s favourite game, Myst, ‘as that I feel seized by it’. And I, currently taking a break from a 12-hour The Sims 2 Bon Voyage build-mode marathon to write this, can only confirm such claims. 

> I’m sure the fact that we gravitate towards this simple kind of pastime has a lot to do with the fact that no one can be arsed engaging with highbrow content during such traumatic times. (Let me take a break from following the dead count on BBC News by watching Battleship Potemkin, said no one ever.) However it’s not only that we’re drawn to accessible content, it’s that we are drawn exactly to the kind of activities that our teenage selves used to be into. (Otherwise, explain why The Sims 2 is having a resurgence - sixteen years after its release [!], and not either of its two successors.)

> If nostalgia is generally understood as originating more in the disappointments of reality than in the draw of the object of nostalgia itself, then the grimness of the pandemic is also to blame for the current millennial vintage trends. As Hess observed elsewhere, the quarantine has forced us into lockdown with the very devices designed to amplify our obsessions, cranking up that very fixative impulse that makes adolescence the curse and blessing that we all know.

> In Italy, where the full lockdown has been going on for over 5 weeks now, the signs of this 30-going-13 epidemic are in full swing. Everybody knows about Italians competing with each other on who can sing the cringiest medley of 00s songs from their balconies. But there’s something even more beautiful that the Italians are doing, and The Answer May Shock You. Platonic love has infiltrated every corner of Italian social media, and the object, I tell you, is no one other the prime minister Giuseppe Conte.

> Just like teenage love, the obsession is platonic socially-distant just as much as it is carnal. ‘Giuseppe Conte’ has reportedly been amongst the most searched terms on Pornhub over the last few weeks. Spurred by sheer investigative rigour I decided to carry out further research on the platform, and can confirm that the PM-themed content abounds. The material itself varies from adorably chaste, SFW picture montages of the prime minister (‘ITALIAN PRIME MINISTER GIUSEPPE CONTE MAKE YOU CUM HARD’, as uploaded by user TheMinisterOfLove), to the literal hour-long speeches that the PM has delivered to the senate, to more visually explicit heart-reacts to the government’s directives (‘HUGE CUMSHOT WHILE LISTENING DADDY GIUSEPPE CONTE’). 

> Pornography aside, the memes have taken over the Italian gram and Twitter. It all started when influencer and entrepreneur Chiara Ferragni regrammed to her 19.5m followers a post by the Instagram page @daddy.conte back in March, erroneously crediting it to @lebimbedigiuseppeconte (Giuseppe Conte’s Little Girls) - now two of the most popular hormone city pages dedicated to the PM. The content is genuinely too much and too good for me to present exhaustively, but I need to show you some favourites so you can get with the vibe (all from @daddy.conte):

[‘Italian daddy locks his girls home’]

[’From today, I declare your smile illegal’]

[’There’s a smile underneath that face mask’]

[’hey baby’ / ‘daddy come to me, my parents aren’t home’ / ‘WHAT’]

[’don’t you dare get close to my girls’]

[’who wants a goodnight story?’]

[’Hi gorgeous, if you’re reading this it’s because i’ve been trapped in a wormhole the only way for you to free me is to stay home until 4th April please do it there is no time i know you can save me baby’] [lol at how quickly this has aged]

>The spinoffs quickly proliferated, I’m talking dozens and dozens of pages devoted to the PM’s fatherly aura and classic good looks - most of them with not a huge amount of followers; a sort of decentralised, massively participatory network of adolescent erotic surplus. Some of these pages specialise in things like the PM’s smile or dimples (for the more faint of heart), inscribing the phenomenon in that Renaissance love lyric convention of praising the object of love’s beauty through a catalogue of their body parts. 

>A similar sexy/cute type veneration also seems to have developed radially around other Italian political figures such as President Sergio Mattarella, however predicated on a completely different set of desirable traits. Conte’s cult is all about a sort of sub/authoritarian kink power dynamic: ‘Dom daddy tell me what to do’. (Problematic? Potentially. However, wholesome? Absolutely). Mattarella’s cult is inevitably linked to the Italian President’s political function, that of protecting the Constitution, coordinating the three branches of government while heading none. A sort of hands-off grandaddy figure there to break up fights, if you will. Combined with his sweet mannerisms, the result is more of a GILF, sitting-together-on-the-porch kind of desirability, as hinted at by the following meme: (@lebimbedisergiomattarella)

> As a testament to this systematic linkage between quarantine and teenage emotional turmoil, the same dynamic of desire has also developed around political figures in the US. Foremost examples are New York Governor Andrew Cuomo (who we now think might have nipple piercings), and Kentucky Governor Andy Beshear - a ‘clean-cut sex symbol for the coronavirus age’ according to this Salon article explaining how ‘his calm and empathetic leadership’ (read: wholesome daddy energy) have thousands of thirsty people in self-isolation lust after him (via memes, of course).

> The ethos of memes in general is already teenage by design (hypertrophic, impulsive, obsessive, thriving on a sort of possessed desire towards repetition that I refuse to compare to masturbation). But there’s something special about the dreamy, sublimated, Platonic, cute-aggressive nature of these memes in particular that makes them the epitome not only of #quarantinevibes, but also of the virtual plaza’s mood, more broadly.  Quarantine has exposed and legitimised, exacerbated and normalised, the internet’s power to make us regress into horny, anxious blobs. And memes like these are the very crystallisation of that ambivalent process. 

> Analysis aside, we love a meme (always already), and we love a femme fandom moment. We stan the birth of a wholesome masculinity mythology for 2020. I can think of worse Internet Utopias. Now back 2 The Sims.

-

Text: Denise Bonetti

Lead Image credit: @onlyconte (Instagram)

Published: 17/4/20

[blackbeerandcoffeemovies]

The Man Who Killed Hitler And Then the Bigfoot

(Watch your head: POTENTIAL SPOILERS AHEAD!)

Apparently, there are just some pairings that the universe conspired to bond together. The result is a bond so elegant, so timeless, so right, that it seems inconceivable that one can exist without the other. The results can be the stuff of legends! To wit: Thor and his hammer, Galileo and his telescope. Sherlock Holmes and his pipe. Jim Bowie and his butcher knife. Eric Clapton and his guitar. Batman and his. . . car. 

Convinced yet? 

Here’s one more: Sam Elliot and his mustache. 

YES indeed! That pairing is as unmistakable as the pyramids of Egypt. Throughout his career, he’s capitalized on this image playing the roles he’s been most known for: as the archetypal, rugged American cowboy in several western films. He casts a lean, weathered shadow and that deep, resonant voice helps complete the package.   

Outside of his western persona though, one role I’ll always remember him by was the roguish but aging mentor to the toughest, hunkiest, most “alpha” among men and famed bar bouncer (played by the late Patrick Swayze) in that testosterone-filled masterpiece, “Road House”. After that, doing what he’s always done best, he took on the supporting role as brother (Virgil) to the legendary lawman Wyatt Earp in 1993’s “Tombstone”. As always, he projected an imposing, stoic figure, stable as a rock but ready for a dust-up if needed.      

I’m definitely a fan of the man but what about the film itself? Shown wide in February of this year, how can you NOT sit-up and take notice of a movie with a title like that? I certainly did! I genuinely thought it was some sort of parody or a sort of subversive superhero theme going against the prevailing genre of champions from the comics.

NOPE. It wasn’t. . . and therein lies my problem with it.   

Elliot as the protagonist plays an elderly senior trying to live a simple retiree’s life, only he’s no ordinary senior citizen. A great part of the film revolves around the vivid flashbacks of a young man’s life, both in love and war. The “old soldier with PTSD” trope is also a main character plot point as he has lived the life of a top operative for the Allies during WW2. It was at that time he was given the mission of all missions (to which the title already gave away to no one’s surprise): to kill Der Fuhrer himself, which he did. The rest, as the conspiracy theorists say, is covered-up history.   

What about the second mythical beast the title alludes he’s killed? At the present time, he’s a late septuagenarian again on a lone mission to hunt a legendary creature that has, quite frankly, earned its reputation because no one’s ever been able to kill or capture it. Why such an errand? Apparently, said legendary creature is carrying a plague of such apocalyptic magnitude that it’s going to wipe out all of humanity!  This daunting task isn’t so much a suicide mission per se, but as a matter of convenience, he’s also immune to the said plague.  

What a giant plot leap, huh?   

Another “tender” subplot all throughout the film is the renewal of brotherly relations with his younger sibling, played by actor Larry Miller. The film certainly tries to explore and give ample time for this aspect of the story, especially since both characters are already in their later years. Miller’s character acts as a confidante and as if, an anchor, to prevent him from floating away into the sea of wretchedness and misery.         

So what’s my issue with the film? I think the most glaring one is how incongruent the offbeat title seems to project compared with how serious the film tries to take itself!  

Second, the overall effort felt very sophomoric in its execution. It was very ROUGH storytelling with characters that seemed to be cut-and-paste to fit the story. Elliot’s caliber as an actor isn’t in question. It’s everything else that he has to work with though! This film was trying to be many things at the same time. It’s not so much that the genres can’t be melded together successfully. However, trying to make it into one functional, homogenous narrative IS the challenge. It all boils down to the execution and it felt that writer/director Robert D. Krzykowski didn’t know how to tell the story.

Perhaps the clearest part showing this lack of narrative direction is the anti-climactic last act. Should a film end with a hero’s glorious death OR wrap things in a nice fuzzy, feel-good resolution? Pick one, because you certainly can’t have it both ways! Then there’s the box. A simple wooden box. That box he longingly clutches but dares not open. I REALLY couldn’t understand the function of this plot device featured all throughout the film except maybe for Krzykowski trying to mess with his audience!   

One absolute defining moment in the film though was the “confession” monologue. In a word, Elliot’s acting was PRISTINE. It was an unsullied moment of catharsis that finally found release. Definitely my favorite moment of the film where Sam Elliot the thespian shines.  

I guess somewhere in all of this was an attempt at an allegory of an elderly man coming to terms with the past. If you do really want to delve deep into highbrow symbolism further, you might even say it’s treading on the Beowulf epic, but let’s not go there shall we? 

If you want movies with similar themes but executed with far better storytelling, director Tim Burton’s “Big Fish” or David Fincher’s “The Curious Case of Benjamin Button” come into mind.        

Personally, the film was a good concept but ultimately fell short of its intention.    

[cinemameta]

A Series of Unfortunate Events: Subverting Expectations

To label A Series of Unfortunate Events a children’s novel would be somewhat of a disservice. Yes, the books are heavily marketed towards children but throwing labels out of the window, it becomes clear the author Daniel Handler, guised under the penname Lemony Snicket, wrote the series with a mature audience also in mind.

The books follow a straightforward plot, which gets pretty repetitive in some chapters, but the overarching themes of tragedy, moral complexity, adultism and the author’s knack for clever wordplay and literary, often time, esoteric references are what make A Series of Unfortunate Events more than just a children’s novel.  It subverts children’s literature by taking familiar tropes, dousing them with dark humor and absurdist satire then setting them afire with Snicket’s ever popular meta-writing. Throughout the pages, allusions to nonfictional characters and pop culture are scattered, with some cleverly integrated to the story and world-building, two favorites of mine would be Sunny exclaiming “rosebud” as she prompts the group to use a sled as an escape vehicle and a villainous optometrist/hypnotist named Dr. Georgina Orwell. The books are abound with off-kilter reference jokes I begin to worry if it’s too alienating for an average child but then again, maybe such highbrow jokes aren't meant for them to understand now. Perhaps their purposes, other than to prove Snicket is a snob, is to introduce and intensify children's thirst for literature.

Other than flexing his extensive knowledge of books, Snicket also dares to impress with his playful, deliberately skewed writing. There are many instances in the books where Snicket totally abandons conventional narrative structure and gets truly creative with syntax and phrase construction but still cautious enough not to be too jarring. Where else can you find sentences being repeated in order to demonstrate the feeling of déjà vu? What book would have a whole page filled with the word “ever” so as to project strong emphasis? Who else would leave two pages entirely printed in black to show how one is speechless and lost for words? Such willingness to be playful with language and narration mirrors the very sentiment of the whole series: even against the backdrop of darkness, it doesn’t hurt to find time to revel.

Upending established tropes is not the only goal here, Snicket also aims to respect the younger ones instead of patronizing them with black-and-white morality. Good people aren’t entirely exempt from doing bad things the same way bad people are not incapable of goodness. The books’ refusal to adhere to moral dichotomies elevates the series a tier higher than those clichéd feel-good fairy tales for it understands that in real life, there are no princes, princesses, witches or evil stepmothers. As a character succinctly puts it, “People aren’t either wicked or noble. They’re like chef’s salads, with good things and bad things chopped and mixed together in a vinaigrette of confusion and conflict”.

This rings true with our central villain Count Olaf who, from the very start was painted to be a morally corrupt, sinister arsonist who greatly despised reading books. And yet towards the end, when accused of setting the Baudelaire’s house on fire, an event which served as the catalyst for the series, countered it with “Is that what you think?”. Mere seconds later, he even recites poetry as he nears his final moments. These contradictions in character afford Count Olaf a layered complexity suggesting there is more to him than just a villain.

Much like the antagonist, our protagonists also have their fair share of paradoxes. Perhaps my favorite moment in the entire series would be when the three protagonists begin to question their own nobility as they are forced to recount the many instances they had to resort to wicked deeds for the sake of a noble cause. We assume them to be completely innocent while judging Count Olaf as guilty for his actions but in retrospect, the Baudelaire’s have also lied, stolen and even burned down a hospital themselves. A Series of Unfortunate Events succeeds in acknowledging how futile it is when complicated topics like morality are trivialized and relegated into a two-choice dilemma for children’s consumption because the truth is, even adults tend to have a hard time grasping ethics.

With this, Snicket uncovers perhaps one of the gravest mistakes an adult could do to a child: to maintain the illusion that wisdom is something bestowed as time passes which in turn, undermines the child’s ability to examine the world through their lenses and make their own observations. Adults can be just as clueless as a toddler about the world around them; wisdom doesn’t come with age, sometimes it comes with tragedy. This becomes evident as one by one, most of the adults the Baudelaire orphans encounter continue to fail them despite their best efforts and their noblest intentions.

For all its inclination to the grim and macabre, and its tendency to subvert expectations of children’s literature, A Serious of Unfortunate Events functions excellently as a novel series shedding light on the bleak, often unheard of, chaotic phase that is childhood. If what you expect from these 13 novels is an unremarkably-constructed, middle-of-the-road goodness-triumphs-over-villainy story dashed with unearned B-plot romance, topped off with shoehorned life lessons about friendships or some sort then as Lemony Snicket would say, "Look away". While other books in the children’s section are still too concerned dissecting Neverland, A Series of Unfortunate Events is already on its way up there with the classics.

[kristannafever]

In The City of Angels - Chapter 2

KRISTANNA MODERN AU Rating: M (swearing)

Chapter Index

Anna pulled away from the lips of the athletic looking, auburn haired man and smiled, but she suddenly looked over to see Kristoff watching her, as if she had felt his eyes on her.  Kristoff hoped that he was able to wipe the stricken look off his face before she noticed it.  He must have, becuase she waved him over with a big smile.

Kristoff approached her numbly, unable to do anything else.  His body was moving automatically, like he wasn’t even in control of it, fake smile plastered all over his face.

“Kris, this is my boyfriend Hans, and Hans this is Kris Bjorgman,” Anna said, taking the ice from his arms and leaving them to talk.

“Nice to meet you,” Kristoff said trying not to deadpan as he shook the smaller man’s hand.  Hans gripped his first tightly, squeezing down with as much force as he dared, like he was trying to prove something.  It wasn’t exactly comfortable, but it was a far cry from actually hurting Kristoff’s large palm.

“Likewise,” he said with a highbrow pitch in his voice. “I have to profess, I’ve never actually seen one of your movies.”  When he dropped Kristoff’s hand he absently brushed his own against the length of his sweater, like he was trying to rid himself of germs.  “I find Action movies to be too pedestrian.  I’m more into dramas, documentaries and thought pieces, you know the like.  Or perhaps you don’t.”

Kristoff was speechless, not knowing how anyone could respond to such a comment upon first meeting someone.  “Well, I have to take off.  Nice to meet you again.”

He left quickly and quietly, not wanting to look into Anna’s eyes again, and certainly not wanting to carry on a conversation with Hans.

Kristoff was dumbfounded as he walked slowly down her driveway back to his home.  He wondered if Hans talked like that all the time, or if he was just saying those things because Anna was out of earshot.  He never would have imagined that she would be interested in someone who acted so high and mighty.  Of course he had to admit he didn't know her at all, and now he probably never would.   That sudden realization stung him in a way he was unfamiliar with.

When he got inside, he shut the door and leaned is back against it.  “Fuck,”he muttered to the empty house. “Of course she has a boyfriend.  How could someone like her be single.”  

He was suddenly chilled with the thought that maybe those cars belonged to Hans. No.  No, they are hers.  You can feel that.  They would be too ‘pedestrian’ for someone like Hans.  All the more reason he couldn’t figure out that puzzle.  He did at least find a small amount of pleasure in the fact that Hans had been acting like a man who felt threatened, and he was glad he was able to provoke that kind of emotion from him.

He got undressed slowly, mulling over all the relationships he had had with women.  When he was a struggling actor he would never get a second glance from anyone in the fairer sex.  He was just some nobody that was trying too hard.  There were many times he was flat out turned down when he would ask a woman out, and on top of that there were so many work rejections;    You’re too tall for this roll...    You are way too rugged looking for what we had in mind...    I think we are looking for someone with more experience...    We need someone with a smaller build...    Uh... sorry no.

He booked work whenever he could, commercials, crime scene re-enactments, small plays, all while auditioning for any role in anything.  Then all of the sudden, he landed his first major part and his name was up in lights.  It was a breakout new action movie that spawned an entire series. 

The movies turned out to be gold mines, and suddenly Kris Bjorgman was Hollywood’s go-to action star.  Everyone wanted them in his films.  He suddenly realized he could choose roles that were offered to him, instead of trying desperately to land anything he could.

He soon had more money than he knew what to do with, and women flocked to him, literally threw themselves at him.  At fist he thought it was great, finally being sought after and not just viewed as an outcast or a loner, but he soon came to understand how fake people could be.  The women who seemed to be attracted to him (to his money and fame) were shallow and vapid.  There were many times he would take someone on a date that he thought would be promising, only to realize that they had nothing in common, and there was no future between them.  The women who showed no interested in him apparently did so for a reason.  They were either already attached to someone, or just flat out didn’t want anything to do with him.  It soon came to the point where he rejected almost all of the advances from women in hopes to just meet someone special by happenstance.

He desperately wanted to find that someone that he had a real connection to.  He wanted to find someone he could easily spend countless hours with.  He wanted a companion, and a best friend, and a lover.  He wanted a soulmate.  He began to think back that maybe he was trying to find that in Sunny since the first couple of times they had gone out he had actually seemed to enjoy himself.  But he realized that there was no denying the fact that he was ignoring that she was basically like all the others.  He had just wanted something to work so badly he turned a blind eye to her true personality. 

And then Anna came into his life.  He didn’t even know why he felt a pull towards her, but he did.  Many beautiful women jogged past the path that bordered his property, but she was somehow different.  He barely talked to her and yet he felt somehow that he knew her.  He couldn’t pinpoint why, but something deep inside him told him so, and so he had watched her and finally met her, and it had left him with hope.  

And then of course, he met Hans.

He laid awake in bed that night trying not to think about Anna’s easy smile and her blue eyes with the curious playfulness he saw in them.  He tried not to think about her suited up in leather, taking the seat of that bike, or sliding on some sunglasses and getting behind the wheel of those cars.  He especially tired not to think about Hans.

He fell into a fitful sleep, dreaming of everything he tried in vain to push from his mind.

*****

Five days had passed before he talked to Anna again.  In that time he focused on trying to resign his feelings for her, even making sure that he was avoiding the window when he knew she would be running by.  But as soon as she caught him driving out of his gate that day, approaching his vehicle to talk to him, all that careful mind work went right out the window.

She had a garden glove on one hand and a small trowel in the other.  Her sun hat flopped sideways on her head as she rose to her feet to approach his truck.  She was wearing shorts; her knees dusted brown from kneeling in the dirt at the end of her driveway.  She wiped her ungloved hand absently on the green tank top, staining it with earth.  She smiled as he rolled down the window to talk to her.

“Hey, I hope Hans wasn’t being an asshole the other night,” she said, which somewhat surprised Kristoff.  He wasn’t used to people talking to him with such directness.

“Uh, no.  Not really,” he didn’t want to lie to her, but he had no idea what to say.

She shrugged and smiled.  “He can be a real dick to other guys sometimes.”  She laughed and it was like music to his ears.  “He’s kind of jealous.  I was just surprised you left so abruptly, I was worried he had said something.”

He shook his head slowly.  “Nothing I haven't heard before,” he said, realizing there was actual sadness in his voice.

Her smile fell and her eyes narrowed slightly.  “I knew it, he said something stupid, that little shit,” she shook her head.  “Well, I want to make it up to you.  How about we grab a beer and a bite tomorrow night, my treat.  I know a good place... out of the way.  No one will bother you.”

“Uh... I don’t know Anna...”

“Oh come on!” she said placing a hand on his arm through his open window.  “It’ll be fun.  We can get to know each other.”

The thought about knowing more about her hit him, and it hit him hard.  “Sure, ok then,” he said before he could stop himself.  There was no way to halt the genuine smile that spread across his face.

“Great!” she said.  “How about you come over at 7.  We can take one of my cars if you like.” 

His heart soared and everything he felt about her suddenly came crashing back all at once.

“I’ll even let you drive one....” she sang playfully.  “It took you so long to fetch the bag of ice I thought you might have been admiring them?”  Her smile was absolute dynamite.

“Well how could I say no to that?” he said enthusiastically, butterflies frantic within him.

She winked at him again as he slowly pulled away. 

He drove to his meeting that afternoon feeling everything good that life had to offer.  The air was warm and with his windows rolled down the passing air tugged pleasantly at his hair.  With the music blaring he felt like he was on top of the world.

[go-redgirl]

How Donald Trump is helping Joe Biden build back better

People tend to think of "activists" as left-wingers who march in the streets against wars or organize rallies for civil rights and social justice. And there is a great tradition in America and around the world for such liberal activism. But it's not just the left that has an activist tradition. The right has one too — and it's often extremely effective.

In the post-WWII years, the right in the U.S. was focused on anti-communism and far-right groups like the John Birch Society attracted middle-class men and women to join clubs and meet to discuss how to fight the onslaught from inside their suburban cul de sacs. In the New Republic some years back, historian Rick Perlstein recounted a hilarious quote from a Dallas housewife in Time Magazine in 1961 saying, "I just don't have time for anything. I'm fighting Communism three nights a week." From the Goldwater campaign in 1964 on, right-wing activists focused much of their energy on getting Republicans elected to office, from school boards to the presidency, and were quite successful at it.

The right-wing grassroots has always organized itself around the idea that they are under siege and unless they pull together to defend themselves, everything they value will be destroyed. Whether it was fighting communism, secularism, terrorism, civil rights or whatever social justice movement that was supposedly threatening their way of life, the right has always been convinced that they are in imminent danger. And when they find themselves at odds with their own fellow Americans, as they so often do, this sense of victimization and martyrdom is what fuels the culture war at the heart of their complaints. As Perlstein wrote in that 2006 piece:

Conservative culture itself is radically diverse, infinitely resourceful in uniting opposites: highbrow and lowbrow; sacred and profane; sublime and, of course, ridiculous. It is the core cultural dynamic--the constant staging and re-staging of acts of "courage" in the face of liberal "marginalization"--that manages to unite all the opposites. It keeps conservatives from one another's throats--and keeps them more or less always pulling in the same political direction.

Donald Trump, however, has upended that longstanding dynamic — and the party establishment has no idea what to do about it.

Igor Bobick of the Huffington Post recently reported that Republican officials are anxiously awaiting a resurgence of the Tea Party, which they have been expecting to reconstitute in the face of Joe Biden's ambitious agenda. It was, after all, a smashing success back in 2009 and 2010 in opposing President Barack Obama's health care plan. You'd certainly assume that they'd be getting the band back together. But so far, it isn't happening. And there's a reason for it: people like what they are seeing.

Bobic quotes deficit hawk Republican Sen. Mike Braun saying, "even my counties back in Indiana are happy, which is a very conservative area. They're asking, 'How can I spend $15 million in a rural county?'" Braun ruefully admits that Biden's agenda is a smart political move and he's right. Biden and the Democrats are betting that people are hungry for some positive government action and they are determined to deliver it.

But there's more to it than that.

The Tea Party was a grassroots movement but it was also heavily subsidized by some of the wealthiest activists in the country. The Koch brothers' operation and other wealthy interests spent quite a bit of money to make the Tea Party a reality because their libertarian ideology really was on the line. But when you think about it, it was a bizarre set of issues for grassroots activists who usually organize themselves around a sense of victimization. And it didn't really fit their usual modus operandi. The "threat" was a total abstraction. How were they "victims" of other people getting health care?

Sure, the right has always opposed government programs if it would benefit those they believe don't deserve them (and I think you know who those people might be). But the outrage against Obamacare was really all about Obama. They had to sublimate their racist backlash into something and that was on the menu but the war the Tea Party was really fighting was against the election of America's first Black president.

Yet some Republicans in Congress are still operating under the illusion that their voters really did care about deficits and will be moved to protest despite the fact that they still adore Donald Trump, a man who didn't care about any of that. In fact, right-wing grassroots activists are already engaged in a battle that is far more energizing and interesting to them than any of that egghead economic stuff ever was: Donald Trump's Big Lie.

According to a new CNN poll, 70% of Republicans believe the election was stolen. And they are taking action. We all know about the flurry of restrictive voting laws that are quickly being enacted all over the country and the preposterous "audit" taking place down in Arizona by a bunch of Trump fanatics and conspiracy theorists is probably just the beginning. The explosion of GOP grassroots activity in the states isn't just about Joe Biden or the events happening in Washington. They are also working night and day to punish Republicans who dared to disagree with Trump's version of events and ensure that Trump will be able to win the next election.

The Washington Post took a look at some of the grassroots action taking place around the country. They interviewed one Michigan organizer who is trying to censure and remove a Republican Party executive who accepted the results of the election. She said, "I think I speak for many people in that Trump has never actually been wrong, and so we've learned to trust when he says something, that he's not just going to spew something out there that's wrong and not verified." That sort of cultish delusion is forcing official rebukes and purges of Trump apostates all across the country.

And then this happened to Sen. Mitt Romney, R-Ut., over the weekend:

The motion to censure the former GOP presidential nominee failed 711-798, which I'm sure softened the humiliating blow. But it's bubbling up to Washington as well. The House GOP caucus thought they had successfully managed the "Liz Cheney problem" but it's coming back. Axios reported that there may be another vote to remove her and from the behavior of the leadership, it seems as though the worm has turned, no doubt because these Representatives are getting an earful from their activist base. The party is now eating its own.

Republicans counting on the Tea Party zombie to rise again had better come up with a Plan B. The activists the GOP in Washington wants to organize against Joe Biden's program are already booked. They're busy fighting other Republicans three nights a week.