#(but even losing - if i'm going to lose i want to lose b/c i'm wrong)

[carriesthewind]

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[azrielbrainrot]

NSFW Alphabet with Azriel

note: since i did the sfw version i thought i'd do this one too! i hope it's not too bad

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Az is definitely the sweetest after sex and he always makes sure you're okay and feel loved. He either helps you clean up or literally carries you to the bath. Also loves seeing you try to take care of him as well.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Wings feels like an easy answer. He's definitely proud that his are the biggest even though he never shows it, as nonchalant as he acts sometimes you know he's cocky as shit under it all. He's probably proud of his physique in general too.

Is saying everything a cop out? I don't see him having a preference as long as it's you.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

He almost always cums inside you. Loves seeing it dripping out of you too. Loves fucking it back inside you with his cock or fingers or even cleaning it up with his mouth for you, tasting you both together. Likes cumming down your throat too. And he'll probably like seeing you covered in his cum in general. As long as it was you making him cum and it ends up in or on your body he'll be happy.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Every once in a while he'll use his shadows to pleasure himself.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

I actually think he was the last of the bat boys to lose his virginity and get any action at all but, even then, of course he has experience. He's 500 years old. He's the type to make sure he knows what he's doing as well so he definitely practiced everything to perfection.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

I don't really know positions names but I imagine he'll like to fuck you in every way he can think of. Definitely likes missionary so he can watch every little expression you make but I don't see it being much of an actual preference.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

He's usually serious.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

I'm sure he keeps it groomed enough.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

He's very intimate. Even when he's rougher, he'll be sure to throw a softer kiss in there at least at the end.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

By himself I don't think he does it that often, especially after meeting you.

Loves watching you do it. You love putting on a show for him too. Like you know he's almost home and you just decide to start without him, letting him get home to the sounds of you moaning his name. He'd tell you to finish and take a seat so he can keep watching with the best view. Then he'll fuck you and keep telling how you did so good for him, putting on such a beautiful show.

I also think he'd use this as a kind of punishment sometimes. You'd be in bed masturbating, trying to make yourself cum and begging for him because his finger, his mouth, his cock feel so much better. But he'd just watch on and cum after you do, getting up to kiss you on the forehead and tell you "next time I'll take care of you if you behave" and walk to the bathroom leaving both of you not quite satisfied.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Let me pull out a list:

dom/sub dynamics. He definitely likes being in control. I see him as a soft/pleasure dom which also comes with a praise kink (I think he'd also like being praised depending on the mood);

voyeurism, but mostly watching you;

cockwarming. Loves watching you sitting on his cock, begging him to move. Which brings me to the next one;

begging. You just sound so beautiful crying for his cock, how could he not.

orgasm control, edging and overstimulation;

breeding. That special tea means he can pump you full as much as he wants without the consequences and he'd be a fool not to take advantage of it;

blood play. On days where things go a bit wrong and he ends up covered in blood so he just winnows in directly to you and fucks you against the wall, covering you in blood too, watching you get corrupted by him (so also corruption lol). He also likes either biting or cutting you a bit and either licking the blood up or writing his name across your body using it;

knife play, truthteller the mvp;

cockwarming;

bondage. I think he likes tying you up but I don't think it would happen that often to be honest. He's very touch starved so he likes when you tear up his back or hold onto him when he's fucking you so well you forget how to breathe. But he also loves tying you up with his shadows and hearing you beg for him, maybe even let his shadows make you cum while he watches.

choking. Loves knowing you trust him enough to literally control how much air you can breathe.

biting, scratching and marking in general. This goes both ways, he loves seeing the marks he leaves on you as much as the ones you leave on him. He definitely likes a bit pain with his pleasure too so he loves when you're tearing his back up with your nails.

a little somnophilia. Loves waking you up by eating you out or being woken up with your mouth or with you straddling his hips;

wing play, almost forgot. He likes it better on softer days or days where you're a bit more in control. When you try teasing him with his wings too much in days where he's feeling rough you always end up with your hands tied up and completely at his mercy.

These are just off the top of my head but I see him being into a lot of things.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

Bedroom. Az definitely likes privacy and, unless it's a quicker affair, he definitely makes a mess of the two of you so being safe in your room is just preferable for a lot of reasons. But his shadows give him endless possibilities so you two have a list of places longer than most. Also he fucks you in his dungeon sometimes and it's some of the dirtiest and best sex you've ever had.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

You. Short answer but I think he doesn't need much to want to fuck you senseless.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

I think he would do almost anything you asked of him. He'd draw the line at really hurting you. I can see him being into spanking, choking, even knife play, some rougher stuff, but never to the point of actually causing much pain.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

He could live the rest of his life happily with you sitting on his face. But of course he loves seeing you with his cock down your throat, struggling to fit everything. I think he's kind of in the middle, leaning more to giving.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Depends on the mood and the day. I think he leans on rough most days but it truly just depends.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

I think he'd always prefer taking his time with you but, especially in the beginning of your relationship, quickies were a regular occurrence. Again, his shadows make things easier here because he can hide the two of you so he doesn't even have to worry about location all that much. I will say quickier always ended with a promise of continuing on later.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Yes, he'll try anything you ask of him at least once. He probably tried everything he could think up before too, especially when he was younger.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

I mean he's a trained warrior so his stamina is probably insane. Let's just say he has definitely fucked you until you were dozing off quite a few times.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

I'm not sure toys exist in the acotar world but he totally would. I'm also going to consider his shadows as toys here because he uses them on you all the time in a lot different ways.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

He's a huge tease. Since he loves both overstimulation and edging and has a filthy mouth, either combination would have you with tears running down your face, considering stealing truthteller to stab him sometimes.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

I don't think he's that loud, maybe more when he's close. He likes hearing you more.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

For every time he fucks you dirty and rough he'll make love to you. Well maybe every two times. He's been waiting for a mate/wife for his whole life and he intends to shower her with as much love as he has to give. Obviously I see him being really kinky and I know dirty probably doesn't even begin to describe the things this man does but I genuinely think he likes soft and intimate sex just as much.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

He's canonically the biggest since the wingspan keeps being compared to other things. And let's not forget that Nesta couldn't wrap her hand around Cassian's so do with that information as you will.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Really high. I think even worse than Nesta and Cassian all over the House of Wind - he's just not getting caught. Maybe not as much before you but definitely after.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

He has trouble falling asleep normally so i don't think he'd fall asleep immediately. Also, like I said, he likes fucking you for hours so you probably knock out a couple minutes after laying down and he'd always fall asleep after you.

[linkemon]

I won't say I'm in love (Shroud Idia x Reader)

Friendly reminder that English is not my first language. You can check my Masterlists both in English and Polish here. Consider supporting me on Ko-fi. You can also check out my commissions if you’re interested.

Other oneshots can be found here.

ɪᴅɪᴀ ᴛʀɪᴇꜱ ᴛᴏ ᴅᴇᴀʟ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴛʜᴇ ᴜɴᴄᴏᴍꜰᴏʀᴛᴀʙʟᴇ ꜰᴇᴇʟɪɴɢ ᴏꜰ ʙᴇɪɴɢ ɪɴ ʟᴏᴠᴇ, ᴍᴜᴄʜ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴏʀɪɢɪɴᴀʟ ᴍᴇɢᴀʀᴀ ꜰʀᴏᴍ ʜᴇʀᴄᴜʟᴇꜱ. ᴏɴ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴀʏ, ʜᴇ ᴡɪʟʟ ᴘʟᴀʏ ᴏᴛᴏᴍᴇ, ᴄᴏᴍᴘʟᴀɪɴ ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ ʀᴘɢꜱ ᴀɴᴅ ᴡᴏɴᴅᴇʀ ᴡʜʏ ɪᴛ ɪꜱ ꜱᴏ ʜᴀʀᴅ ꜰᴏʀ ʜɪᴍ ᴛᴏ ᴀᴄᴄᴇᴘᴛ ɪᴛ.

— Ortho, can you repeat that again? — Idia blinked rapidly.  

He stared at his brother as if he had suddenly sprouted three heads. In the darkness, illuminated only by the light falling from the screen, he had the impression that the dark, robotic silhouette had turned into Cerberus. A huge dog standing guard in the doorway. He would love to cross to the other side of this imaginary Styx but he couldn't. Such betrayal? His own brother stabbing him in the back?  

— Bro, you don't have to be so dramatic…— Ortho shook his head. — I invited [Reader] because you haven't seen each other for a long time and...  

— And you don't see any problem? You're a huge red flag for doing this behind my back. —The older brother hugged the pillow. The huge dakimakura seemed to help him shut out the world.  

The youngest Shroud turned on the light. The glow of LED bulbs seemed to peer into every corner. It was looking for colourful wrappers from sweets imported from abroad. It skimmed over every screw and scrap of metal from failed projects. It even discovered piles of comic books mixed with records falling out of their packaging. The room was a mess. Ortho was aware of this. However, he stated that it was not worth turning the knife in the wound. He did not comment on the state of affairs. Instead, he turned on the quick cleaning mode. Idia joined him reluctantly. Silently, with a suffering face, he threw the garbage into a large bag.  

Ortho wondered what exactly he had done wrong. According to his information, [Reader] and Idia did not have a quarrel. On the contrary. Since everyone had returned from S.T.Y.X. HQ, he felt like his brother had finally made some friends. People he likes spending time with. They played games together and sometimes he even let them take him outside, which was a big success in itself. The prefect didn't mind his enthusiasm for fantasy. She seemed happy to learn about the media that reigns supreme in Twisted Wonderland. She hadn't had much opportunity to explore this side of the world, so Shroud was quietly happy to introduce the, as he put it, noob to the most important corners of Internet.  

The contact ended quite suddenly. Ortho didn't need special programs to notice that something was wrong. He asked [Reader] directly but she said that Idia was apparently very busy with a new project. He would have believed it if he hadn't lived with him. How busy can you be watching the same old Premo concert for the thirty-third time in two weeks? His brother looked like he couldn't find a place in his own beloved room and didn't want to say what was going on. So Ortho did what he always did — he pushed him. The invitation was the first step. What he will do with this fact will be his initiative alone. With that thought he left the room.  

There was a faint knocking sound through the metal door. Idia felt like he had just had a heart attack. He had a choice:  

a) pretend he's not there (20% effective, most people on campus knew it wasn't true because he used this attack too often)  

b) say that he is sick (an even worse plan, because someone will definitely take him to the hygienist)  

c) ask [Reader] to go away (a tragic choice in RPGs that causes you to lose a companion; if she hasn't hated him by now, she definitely will after this option)  

d) open the door like a civilized person his parents tried to raise him to be (he will be given the fearful status but will gain +10 courage)  

He decided on the last option and, taking a deep breath, opened the door.  

— Hi! — [Reader] immediately went to her usual place on the huge pouffe. She fell on it like a giant starfish from the Octavinelle aquarium.  

The boy expected anything. Or at least reproaches. He didn't fully understand himself. Was he such a good liar? NO. He wasn't stupid. He knew his capabilities. He was never great at this. Unless we're talking about framing someone from the opposing team in games but that's not the case. Maybe he was annoyed that she didn't miss him as much as he missed her...  

— I brought us a new game. Cater recently mentioned that his sisters had some to give away because they were bored of them, so I took all they had.  

— What do you have there? — he risked a safe question.  

The girl handed him a colourful package. He guessed that the record was second-hand. The colourful cover looked like it had seen better days. However, after seeing a crowd of pretty 2D men, he guessed what genre he was dealing with. Visual novel. And not just any kind. In his hands he held an otome…  

— Reincarnated in a fantasy world with six princes after being run over by a carriage... Okay, this title is so long it doesn't even fit on the cover. Meet them all: rules-loving, wild, THIS ONE IS A MERMAID?!  

He didn't feel like reading the rest. Idia wasn't a noob when it came to otome. On the contrary. He ate his teeth on all possible game genres. Usually, however, he made sure that they maintained any level. However, this title seemed to him like a bunch of random tropes. Someone on the other side just had to wait to throw them all together and create their fan dream.  

— I guess we can just take making choices — he said, inserting the disc into the console.  

— Don't worry, good people, for ladyknightskibidi:3 has arrived! — announced the prince with the archetype of the mysterious figure.  

— Idia, you have the humor of a seven-year-old — said the girl, seeing the MC nickname written on the screen.  

— But admit it, you're enjoying it. — Shroud handed over the controller.  

The heroine's long hair waved in the wind. Her eyes seemed to contain the light of all the stars. Rose petals were floating in the air and their strong scent seemed to captivate everyone around. Even though it was the middle of winter and they basically should be dead...  

— You can even choose the colour of the horse. Do you think this is important to the plot? And what if we miss the illustration? — [Reader's] hand hovered over the controller.  

— It's an obvious move. They want us to think that white is assigned to the pretty guy and black is assigned to the mysterious guy. Meanwhile, it's quite the opposite. I don't know who the last one is assigned to but it doesn't matter — Idia said.  

The white steed, a brave companion on many journeys, headed towards the main gate, where ladyknightskibidi:3 met the archetypal prince with a heart of gold who was talking to an NPC. She made her purchases, although they actually had no impact on the plot and were just a cash grab to force players to buy new outfits for the characters. So she left without a new dress, which was highlighted in the illustration by the armor that did not match the idyllic setting. After all, who says you can't kiss in full armor on the beach...?  

— There's no way we're going to pay for any DLC. Who do they think they are?  

— Do you know what the process of publishing indie games looks like? They have to make money somehow.  

— I don't care, we don't pay! I got this from Cater. Free is a fair price.  

The heroine saw the ultimate villain of the series, whom she had to defeat. With the power of kindness, friendship and, of course, sarcasm. Mostly sarcasm. Dressed in completely mismatched clothes because good stats are the most important. Even if it means you get married in a neon hat... The most important thing is that MC and her groom rode off into the sunset. Good ending unlocked. Now just repeat this a few times and multiply it by each save to also make bad endings...  

— Is it the end already? I understand they had to cram in a few routes but this is so short. — Shroud shook his head.  

The screen showed a colourful collage of obtainable illustrations. The end credits and the creators' names were scattered between them.  

The chosen one of MC's heart seemed to be smiling mockingly at Idia from behind the glass. Here is another story where someone like Vil from Pomefiore wins a girl's heart. Handsome, rich and famous. The complete package.  

— Oh yes, beautiful and perfect type. Why am I not surprised that bishōnen won? — Shroud mumbled into his sweatshirt sleeve.  

Unfortunately not quiet enough.  

— Idia, need I remind you that you also made half of the choices. You're also responsible for the outcome — [Reader] commented, putting down the controller.  

— I chose exactly as normies do in real life.  

— It's not about the game at all, is it? — [Reader] looked straight at him. — You've been avoiding me for two weeks. — So he really wasn't a good liar after all, he thought. — I don't think I gave you a reason to be offended but if I did, just tell me. And if it's another S.T.Y.X. problem, I'll try to do something too but I can't help you if you don't talk to me at all.  

Communication was never his default stat. However, he had to admit that he rarely tried to put any points into this skill tree. He just didn't develop it. He really wanted to start but just thinking about it felt like the ends of his hair were starting to change colour. The edges of the metalic chairs reflected an embarrassing red. As always, his hair had to betray him.  

Idia was a nerd. He thought through the situation in several hundred different ways and came up with tons of potential solutions. So why wasn't this conversation in any of his plans? Why was it so difficult to put any of the imaginary conversations into action? His brain went into a glitch because he had to face this hopeless truth that he didn't want to reveal even to his own brother.  

What could he say? [Reader] didn't deserve this prolonged, embarrassing silence. But she waited patiently despite two weeks of being ignored. So he did what was the only thing that came to his mind.  

— I'm an NPC — he finally said.  

— Okaaay. — Prefect of Ramshackle tilted her head uncertainly.  

— No, you don't understand — he sighed, rubbing his forehead. — For example, take the MC from Reincarnated in a fantasy world... uh... the MC from this game. You are like her. The main character is always running around and helping all the characters around her, without looking at herself. She doesn't even realize that she is smart, selfless and beautiful. She always knows what to say to bad guys and is not afraid to fight. And then a prince arrives on a white horse. He's pretty, rich, and provides her with everything she needs. There are no flaws because that's not how you write ikemens. They just should be cool and that's it. Then these two come together and boom! Good ending. At their wedding, the creators will put the NPC who sells you items in the crowd because they don't want to make a new model, so they can use it. In the sequel, maybe he'll even say a few words and you'll find out that he has a brother, a magic workshop and will repair your carriage but that's where the relationship ends. He will stand by the gate and sigh because he loves her but he will never tell her because he is not even in this game. He was never selected so he didn't make it to the cover...  

Everything he said came to him with a delay. When it came to games, his brain had always thought faster. But now he cursed him inwardly because the statement seemed to hang heavy in the air.  

[Reader] looked at him searching for something. She seemed to weigh her words. But he was prepared for anything. He played so many bad endings. This one will just be another one of them. So why was his heart beating so terribly fast and he was silently praying to his favourite idols to just take him away?  

— There are almost always secret routes in otome — the girl said.  

— Huh? Idia blinked rapidly. — I've played more otome than you, I don't know if you should educate me…— [Reader]'s raised brow made him stop talking.  

— The truth is, I played it a little with the Cater's sisters. This game also has a secret route. The seventh romance character is hidden. You unlock it when you pass…  

—…all routes — Shroud interjected. — Okay, I'm seriously shutting up now — he added, looking down.  

— This character is an item NPC. — [Reader] paused in case the boy was to interrupt her again but nothing happened. — What I mean is that the MC can also choose an NPC. If only he tells her how he feels and wants to take part in the game.  

The screen illuminated her face with a pale glow and the boy realized that in the darkness she really looked like the main character. How can you seriously say something so cool, as if nothing happened? She stared at him with silent expectation. He wanted to scream into dakimakura but he probably wouldn't look too cool doing it. So he mentally prayed to his idols. If there was ever a time the Premos should help him, this was it.

— In the game, the MC makes decisions, so technically she has no causative power and... Ahem. Okay. I know that I'm going too far. Sooo... would you like to go on a date with me? But it's best not to go to Mostro Lounge because there are a lot of people there and for the first time it could be tragically scary and...  

— Idia?  

— Yes? — He swallowed loudly.  

— I'll go on a date with you but your hair is burning the controller right now...  

[angelicsjn]

how'd your yanderes react if their darling is so stressed they become su!c!d@l (either because of them or something else, but please do 'because of them for jae coz i wanna see that todic little shit suffer)?

YOUR SEVEN YANDERES.

A N: I am trying to fly through these old requests, I have about 38 to complete — I deleted loads of requests that were similar to each other so I don't feel swamped and give up, lmao.

A B O U T: You have had enough of them and their ways, but at what cost?

W A R N I N G S: Mentions of suicide, angst, and heavy topics based around mental health such as depression. Read with caution, stay safe, and remember that you are not alone.

— ROMAN BEAUREGARD.

With Roman, it would derive from the fact that he has made you become dependant on him.

When given that space away, for how many weeks or months, you feel at a literal loss. And then that's when it sinks in.

You can't live without him.

You would miss that routine, miss him telling you what to do, who you can't go out with, clothes to wear that makes him look good or to match, you miss the stability of his control.

With him gone, you have nothing but your own mind. But your mind became his, even if you dont realise it.

"I'm struggling, Roman." You say down the phone, voice as shaky as your hands. "I need you."

His heart swells with a mixture of emotions. First, happiness. He likes that you need him. He feels important because of it. But he also feels upset because he wants you there, too. Deep down, he needs you just as much as you need him.

He will have you take over to him, where he will cover himself over you until you feel better — he's never been so attentive in his life.

— LATEN REED.

It would be his constant need of being there.

Everywhere you go, he follows. Everywhere he needs to go, so do you. Every game. Every practice. Every party. Everything.

You have no breathing space, no time to be yourself and alone.

One day, you crack. It drives you to literally insanity.

"Just leave me the fuck alone!" You scream, eyes red and streaming hot angry tears.

He stands there watching you with wide eyes. He doesn't get what he did wrong, he's just trying to be a good boyfriend?

"You're always there. Always. It makes me want to fucking kill myself!" You scream out in a fit of rage.

His heart drops.

He made you want to ... die?

Laten sucks it up and attempts to hold back the tears. He can't let it be known that it affected him that much.

"I'm sorry. I'll leave you alone." And he does.

He doesn't attend parties for a while, and when he does, he looks down. You don't go to practice, he doesnt wait outside of your class until you finish, he stops it all.

He only sees you when you initiate it. He withdraws, and though he doesn't want to end it, he believes that you're done with him.

He's waiting for you to drop the bomb break his heart.

— JAE 'NIKO' LEE.

I'm sorry. But with Jae. It's inevitable.

He's too much to handle, it's bound to happen at some point.

You withdraw socially, you look different, you don't eat, you have pretty much no life because of him.

You fall into a lull of the same shit every day, and at some point, you don't feel like you're even living at all.

You don't even cry anymore. He shouts, you're glazed over and you don't even hear him.

He thinks that he's won until he sees the destruction, and thank God that it wasn't too late.

After the incident, he tries so hard because he realises that you are fragile. You can't handle him. He attempts to be kinder, to keep in touch with his softer side for the sake of you.

But he watches you sometimes and sees nothing there.

— KAIDAN WOLFE.

"Why do you want to die?" He asks you, your diary in his hand.

You panic a little. That's your privacy in his hand. The only bit you had left.

Kaidan cries, so hard, "i can't lose you."

But he doesn't see that's it's him that pushes you towards that mentality.

The constant brain-fucking or his delusions drove you to just wanting to give up. What's the point when he doesnt listen anyway?

He keeps that up even after reading about it in your diary because he doesn't see that the problem lies between you both.

It's always something else. You two are too perfect.

— HAYDEN WEST.

Hayden wouldn't do anything to make you feel this way, so I doubt it applies to him. Anything you want, you have.

So, maybe it's your mental health.

He will Google ways to help. Use his own experiences to make you feel better.

He does all he can to help you be okay, to not feel the way that you have been.

— JOSHUA WHITE.

Just like Hayden, he wouldn't ever do anything to push you in that direction.

When he sees your struggles mentally, he takes extra time with you.

Take baths together, cuddle extra before bed, take more walks together, go to church together, and involve you in the community to belong somewhere kind.

He wants you happy and safe, so he treats you as such, keeping an eye on you and being there to listen when needed.

— BLAKE CROSS.

His life is hectic. Always something going on and that can become a lot, especially if you deal with bad mental health.

Blake may be as forward and vocal as the other yanderes, but he wouldnt ever push you towards doing and thinking of such things.

He cares deeply and knows when to back down with you, unlike others. He couldn't give a shit about others — but you? You're his world.

When he sees that everything is becoming too much, he takes a step back and puts himself into your shoes.

He's never been suicidal. Never wanted to do such things. So he doesnt get it. But he sees the pain that you feel and it kills him.

He will go on a trip with you, somewhere nice to refresh and escape a little. You can focus on each other and ignore the world.

When you're back, he's delicate and asks you what you want to do. Not tell you that you're going to join him.

[gatorbites-imagines]

Would it be too wild of me to ask for plastic man because my autism chose the silliest guy to be my favorite 💔💔

I dont think this is too insane but I'm literally desperate for any content I'm going to explode I don't even care if it's just headcanons sfw or not or anything I will implode into confetti

this would obviously be with male reader but I don't mind if it's ftm because I am trans so uhmm do whatever

Patrick “Eel” O’Brian

Sfw alphabet

Plastic man has a special place in my heart too, so I get it. have an alphabet.

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

It depends on who you are, but assuming that you are his romantic partner, then I could see him being very affectionate. Both physically and emotionally. Since he doesn’t age or has the ability to die, Patrick would hold onto you and love you as much as he could, since there will be a day where he is gonna lose you. Shows his affection mainly through physical affection, its not unusual for some part of him to be coiled around you whenever you guys are together.

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

Patrick would be a great best friend, he’s ready to square up with anybody who crosses you, always batting for your team as long as you aren’t extremely in the wrong. He has moments where he would be quite insightful as well, if that’s what you needed. The friendship probably starts because you are a hero, villain, etc, too. Or because you were in the wrong place at the wrong time.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

Pat loves to cuddle, he wraps himself around you like a blanket most nights. He will keep human shape if that’s what you prefer though, he just loves to be completely wrapped around you and just squeeze you close.

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

I could imagine part of Pat wants to settle down and just live a normal life, but its hard when you have the powers he has. he would be willing to give it a try though, if that’s what you wanted too. I’m not sure I can imagine him as the greatest cook out there, but I also don’t see him as someone who’s against doing chores and manual labor.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

It depends on why you guys break up. If it was something like to keep you safe, then he might come up with some cover or excuse. But if it was for some more painful reason like cheating or something along those lines, then he would be a lot more blunt and just tell his partner to their face that its over and why its over.

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

Like settling down, I can imagine part of Pat really wants to get married. Hes loyal to a fault when it comes to the one he sees as his one and only, and it all depends on his partner how fast he wants to get married. I could see him as the kind to have dated for a short while and think “yup, I’m gonna marry them”, but he doesn’t want to rush you.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

I think Pat would forget his own strength sometimes, resulting in too crushing hugs or you getting thrown around from he’s excited, but he always apologizes whenever it happens. Hes also gone through quite a lot in his life, so he would have a lot of insight in emotions, but I could imagine its hard for him to talk about at times.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

Yes I think Pat doesn’t just like hugs. He loves hugs and he would hug his partner any chance he gets. Just being close to you is a blessing for him, especially if it’s after that time he was “dead” and putting himself back together for thousands of years.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

It depends. Some might see Patrick as somebody who would drop the L-word immediately after you guys start dating, but hes also been through quite a lot and has lived a long life with a lot of experiences, so this is an area where I could imagine he takes his time since it’s a very serious word for him.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

I don’t think he gets jealous super easily, since hes sure in his relationship with you. That doesn’t mean he never gets jealous, just that he doesn’t get jealous by small or everyday things. He still get jealous if somebody else flirts with you, which ends up with him hooking an arm around you and butting in in some way.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

Like hugging, Patrick would love to kiss. He kisses you all over, littering you in pecks all over your face, neck, hands, etc. but when it comes to kissing you on the lips, Pat would take his time to really put his love in it. he loves to kiss you pretty much anywhere, but he does prefer on the lips. Which is also why he likes being kissed on the lips the most. He comically melts every time you do, since he has the ability to do so.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

In the comics, Plastic Man has a kid or kids, but it all depends on you if you guys have any. I do imagine he’s great with kids though, taking his time with them and letting them feel safe and heard, especially since he grew up with an abusive father. He wouldn’t want kids to feel unsafe around him.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

Pat is one of those people I can imagine wakes up refreshed and bright eyed, or is it goggled in his case? Hes always more refreshed than you, but he likes to just lay and admire you for a while. Being stereotypically romantic, Pat would probably also bring you breakfast in bed if you guys have time for that. Likes to wake you up with kisses before your alarm goes off.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

When he’s really tired, Pat will just start outright melting or deflating and collapsing on the floor or on top of you, sighing and complaining about how tired he is. Ends up with you dragging his deflated body to bed where you guys can cuddle, which is one of his favorite times of the day. Because of his powers, I don’t think Patrick needs much sleep, but he wants you to get a healthy amount of sleep.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

He comes across as a very easygoing and bright guy, but I think it would actually take quite a while for Patrick to open up about himself and his past, like his childhood or how he used to be a criminal, unless you somehow already knew that, like if you were a hero too. Things would get told little by little over time as he starts to feel safer and deeper connected, most stuff you learn being from comments or things he does without thinking too much about it.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

When it comes to you and everyday things, I think Patrick would have quite a lot of patience. Why get angry about not being on the same page about dinner, or who needs to do which chore, especially when you can live and have lived as long as Patrick. He would get frustrated and angered if you put yourself in danger though.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

He shocks you by remembering quite a lot about you, remembering small details you have mentioned maybe once or twice. He tries to remember important days too, but he never feels bad if you don’t remember it in return.

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

When you agreed to be his partner, or if you guys are married, when you said yes to marry him. Other than that, his favorite moments are the small everyday domestic things, like going shopping together, cooking together, or just sitting and watching a movie.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

Being a superhero, there is a level of protectiveness in Patrick, especially with the kinds of baddies he fights and the kind of rivalry he has going on. He doesn’t joke about your safety, and would also make sure you teach you how to defend yourself, or get you in contact with other heroes that could keep you safe if he couldn’t.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

Goes comically over the top, its honestly charming how much he cares. Like the type to set up a whole thing on the beach with balloons, roses, candlelight and the works. If you don’t like huge shows though, Pat would do something more lowkey but just as meaningful.

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

I could see a bad habit of his being not telling his partner when he goes on missions, or dangerous missions. I don’t think he does it on purpose most times, it just slips his mind since its such a normal part of his life. He always makes sure to apologize and make up for it though, and he does try his best to remember.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

Pat would act like he doesn’t care too much about his appearance. But I think after a while of dating you, he might start doubting himself, seeing as he has one outfit and one color scheme. Hes pretty good at hiding it, but you’ll figure it out at some point where you reassure him that it doesn’t bother you.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

He would. Those times he’s gone longer periods without his partner always left him feeling hollowed out and like something important was missing. This is also why he does his best to live life to the fullest with you, since he knows there is gonna be a day where its just gonna be him. He doesn’t want to think about it, but he lays awake at night sometimes thinking about it.

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

A cat person. He doesn’t hate dogs, he just likes cats more. He always jokes that they’re long and loose like he is, and that like cats, he’s a liquid too.

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

If you were a judgmental person, and didn’t believe that people could change if they truly wanted too. With his background and experiences, I couldn’t see Patrick dating somebody who looked down on others, especially if that other person was in a bad spot.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

Clingy sleeper, like you don’t need a blanket because he just turns into the blanket and wraps around you like a burrito. Better get used to not being able to move too much at night, it’s like a sleeping bag, or like a bat with its wings wrapped around it.

[the-power-of-a-pen]

To Love, To Lose

Fandom: Insomniac Spider-Man

Summary: Harry shows up to May's house while you and MJ deliberate. He seems... different.

Word Count: 1068

Pairing: Harry Osborn x reader (romantic - established)

Trigger(s): Cursing, Light angst

A/n: I wrote this in 10 minutes and I wasn't going to post it b/c I didn't think it was up to my usual standard? But hey, the Harry Osborn fans have such little content, so why not. Might delete later, but feel free to request something!

MJ was pacing around in May’s house while talking to Peter on the phone when knocks came from the front door. 

“I’ll get it,” you told her. You were already jittery enough with the state of the city and you needed to move around.

Pete’s voice was barely audible from MJ’s phone, saying, “Just… try to stay away from Harry. He’s not himself anymore.”

You shuddered and toyed with a hair tie on your wrist. The last time you saw your boyfriend, he lashed out and yelled at you to leave his apartment. It was the first time you had ever been scared of him, and unfortunately, it wasn’t the last. 

You opened the door and yelped when you saw Harry leaning in the doorway with a distant, mischievous look in his eyes. You immediately went to slam the door shut, but he put his hand on the door and pushed it open with an unprecedented amount of force. 

MJ had had to deliver the news of what had happened to Harry in the Oscorp lab. About how ghostly he looked, and how angry he was, and how that thing swallowed him whole. How it made a mockery of one of the kindest souls you’d ever met by speaking as if they were one. 

But in front of you was Harry, your Harry, in the flesh. He looked more alive than ever before.

“Babe,” you started cautiously, hoping to appeal to whatever was left of your boyfriend. “I haven’t heard from you in while. I was worried.”

He took a slow step towards you and you fought the urge to move back. Some scuttling in the background told you MJ was searching for her gun behind the kitchen counter.

“I’ve been busy.” He took another step closer to you, and this time, you bumped into a stack of boxes behind you. His eyes traced your silhouette. “Do you know why I fell in love with you?”

You didn't even bother trying to find out where the fuck he pulled that question from. He's still there, you told yourself. Just respond how you normally would. "Because I'm hot?"

Harry put his hand on your cheek. “Charming, as always.” He let his hand fall. “It’s deceiving.”

“What do you mean?” Hurry up, MJ.

“This is me giving you a chance, love,” he drolled. “I fell in love with you because you’re always helping people. You’ve always been that way. With your work in FEAST, with Pete and his hero work, when Mom passed…” Harry’s eyes fluttered and you willed him to hold onto that bit of consciousness. “I’m better now. I have the power to make everything better. The question is, are you going to join me?”

“Harry,” you began, looking down. He grabbed your chin so that you met his gaze, with more force than need be. You squeezed your eyes shut.  You were trembling now, and his grasp did not loosen. “I want to help you,” you whispered, “But this isn’t the way.”

“Look at me.”

You obliged, and locked your jaw to gather some nerve. 

He took a step back and released you, seeming shocked at his own on-and-off behavior. “Are you scared of me?”

You reach out to him tentatively and brought the sides of his jacket closer to his neck. He was seeing through you, his eyes scrutinizing your every minor movement, so you said the only honest comment that felt safe to say. “I’m scared for you.”

His tendrils shot out abruptly and grabbed your arm, making you scream. “After everything we’ve been through together, you still won’t trust me. You’re so fucking blind!”

“Harry, this isn’t you.” You fought to get out of his tendrils’ grip, but they move to take hold of your neck. 

“Wrong,” he grinned, applying more pressure. “This is the real me.”

Harry spasmed suddenly and fell to the floor, dropping you in the process.

"Back window," MJ ordered, taser gun in hand as she ran to meet you on the other end.

You didn't hesitate. How could you? You always thought your loyalty would overpower your survival instinct, but a loved one binding with an alien and choking you seemed to be the breaking point of that value. The feeling of betrayal burned, and you couldn't decipher it.

You ran through the kitchen and into the backroom, then vaulted through the window -- but not before grabbing a box cutter on your way out. MJ helped you to your feet, but Harry had already recovered and was in pursuit.

MJ put her hands up in surrender, and you mirrored her actions. "We love you, Harry. Do you know how much it hurts to see you like this?"

"It hurts to see me healed?" Harry laughed darkly. "Some friend you are. Maybe that's why your writing never goes anywhere."

You turned to your last ditch effort. "You're right," you told him, stepping forward while MJ stood frozen behind you. "We haven't been listening to you. You look healthier now, because of... the suit." You took a few more steps forward. His tendrils swirled behind him - he was wary, but not enough to attack. "Who's to say what else it can do? I'm scared, Harry, I won't lie. But I'm tired of not being able to save the people I love."

Harry closed the distance and took your hand. "You're ready to take that leap of faith?"

You gulped and nodded. The symbiote travelled from his arm to your enclosing around it and spreading to your chest. "One more thing, though." You pulled him closer with your free arm and whispered in his ear, "I don't go down without a fight."

You plunged the box cutter into Harry's side.

Harry didn't react. Harry wasn't there at all. The symbiote, no longer attached to the both of you, consumed Harry entirely. It was a looming, hideous monster. "Naïve. We should have known better. But you should have, too."

His tendrils shot out towards MJ. You ran to free her, but got thrown into the wall of the house by another tendril. MJ screamed and clawed at the grass, but the symbiote overcame her in angry strands of red and yellow until a smaller, more terrifying version of Harry's monster took hold of her.

"Show them what they're missing," the larger symbiote called over its shoulder before launching into the distance.

[roo-bastmoon]

So privacy has been violated OR...

... a smear campaign has begun.

Let's just get this new dating scandal out of the way so we can get back to buying and streaming...

Listen, I don't share unofficial content, but by now everyone in this tag knows there's a video going around that's supposed to be of JK in his apartment with Bam, walking around back-hugging and perhaps kissing a girl. Folks say there's the same couch, same wall panel, and a mood lamp.

I'm side-eyeing this because it's super grainy footage, the windows are different, the wall panel seems to be in different places in the two videos, the guy is shorter than the girl, and he's wearing a mask indoors. Plus, the account that dropped the videos supposedly posted then promptly closed up shop, which seems like they had the intention for deliberate sabotage instead of clout chasing as a sasaeng.

But people say the apartment set up seems really similar and the man has a similar hairstyle to what JK had in the beginning of 2023. So I guess it's Schrodinger's cat at this point.

(Isn't it curious that apartment-related scandals seem to happen on the day new content drops? Hmm... I digress.)

Look... If Jungkook (or Jimin) ends up dating someone else, I'm still going to support them as individuals. I'll be sad of course, because Jikook had AMAZING chemistry and I was really rooting for them to be together forever and all... but, I want them to be happy and fulfilled more than I want them to fit into any fantasy or ideas of my own.

That being said: at this very moment, half of Jimin's insta feed is about Jungkook. Most of Jungkook's lives for 2023 have JK mentioning Jimin, or even being totally focused on Jimin. There's years of super duper sus history between them. Right up to and including yesterday, where Jimin very heavily implied they are sharing Chuseok together.

It feels really weird to me that Jimin would want to tie JK's hair back neatly, call JK baby, beg JK to stay longer at his rehearsal, and joke that he can handle seeing JK naked -- but JK can't come over to shower and visit b/c Jimin says he just isn't that easy... if JK were in a relationship with someone else.

It also feels really weird to me that JK would light up like a super nova any time Jimin commented on his lives, would beg Jimin to hang out, would sing all of Jimin's songs and memorize Jimin's interview content, would travel with Jimin for his debut, then roll around naked in bed grinning and blushing while flirting with Jimin on live... if JK were in a relationship with someone else.

That would make Jungkook kind of a shitty boyfriend and Jimin kind of a shitty friend.

I know Jungkook is cultivating this cool guy/ladies man image right now and that is kinda baffling. I know friends can play-flirt, too... but to do all that on lives, after all their history together, knowing what half of Korea and ARMY thinks? Hm.

That's not "fanservice;" that's really toeing the line of queerbaiting. And it's really hard for me to imagine Jimin or Jungkook doing something like that. Jimin said he hates fake bromance stuff. (I guess anything is possible. It's a new chapter, after all. Maybe it's par for the course in idol-world.)

Hey, maybe Jikook had an amicable break up but are still really close and are fine teasing each other? Maybe they always liked to flirt but never were together? Maybe I've been reading it all wrong this whole time? Or maybe this is a bullshit video?

Whatever the reality is, I'm prepared to acknowledge it. At any time.

I'm not in a cult. I don't have to convince myself of anything. Jikook's behavior had made me think Jikook were in a relationship. If JK is dating someone else now? Okay then. I will just stop posting Jikook content and continue to help OT7 and celebrate my bias with all my heart.

No need for elaborate conspiracy theories or coping histrionics. If JK is in his Loving Women Era, good for him. Go with god, my brother. (Personally, I'd never recover from losing my chance to be with Thee Park Jimin, but that's me!)

But something about this just doesn't quite feel right. I wonder if he'll address it at all, like he did when folks filmed him in his gym or sent food to his home? Because if this is somehow real, it's a HORRIBLE invasion of privacy; home is supposed to be a safe place, and stalkers are scary.

And if it's not real, then someone is going to an AWFUL lot of trouble to overshadow Jungkook's release and upcoming album and that is unhinged. The kind of trouble that reminds me of apartment break-ins and tampered mail.

In any case, like I said: I'm ready to accept whatever the reality is, once the reality becomes clear.

I really love Jungkook. I really love Jimin. I really love BTS. They were there for me at the darkest, lowest point in my life. So whether I was right or wrong about Jikook, it doesn't really matter. In the end, I support them as far as I can.

But also, I sorta think this video may just be bullshit. So let's let them have their privacy, and focus instead on voting for Jimin and buying and streaming for JK instead, hmm? Eventually the truth will come to light.

No matter what happens, let's behave in a way that would make Jimin and Jungkook proud.

Love, Roo

[bl00dlight]

Question for the Culture...

Some thoughts on s2, Aemond needing mothers milk, alicole pussy rubbing, the Greens writing & characterisation.

After some consideration, I think the reason way the brothel scene is so jarring is because we've spent so little time with Aemond as a character, and S1 purposefully set up this very real mystique around him - espeically regarding duty, having disdain for Aegon's depravity (and literally being above it himself?) Etc, that we didn't get to see the process of what actually led Aemond there as a character. I actually do think it's because we are getting so few episodes that they are bypassing the very needed character progression that Aemond 10000% needs. It feels out of character because the show has set up a character which was exceedingly adverse to that behaviour. And you can feel the shift in his character, this season. To me he feels completely different, which shouldn't be the case just yet since like... Luke supposedly died only two weeks prior to the start of the season. We didn't get to see his progression into going from Alicent's #1 ride or die, to being her biggest hater? Nor did we see his progression into why he was even at the brothel? The leaks spoke about Aegon taking him to Cock Inn during B&C and well, we know that was the case because the Madam mentioned that. But? Why would they not show us that? Why would they not show us Aemond's progression into making that decision in the first place and the after effects leading him to returning back there? I think the scene was within his characterisation but like... not out of the blue. It felt like something we needed to see unfold. Because also, now all of his mystique is shattered. Like those are such STRONG choices to make him a milk drinking, fetal position, mummy's milkers ass bitch straight off the bat. Like??? Considering that two weeks ago he was like "Bro I am so much better than Aegon. I don't do that depravity shit. I'm dutiful, I should be King cause my brother is fucken gross and weak." Well? Okay... now Aemond is objectively grosser and weaker. Which was likely always the case, but it's something that should have been developed and revealed with time? They inadvertently destroyed the idea of his "mask" and his character being a massive antagonistic force that parallels Daemon. Because we've spent 10x more screen time with Daemon and we know underneath he is also fragile and vulnerable. We know that his dependence on Rhaneyra is significantly more complicated than it being about ambition. But it's not shown yet, he still actively is maintaining this incredibly antagonistic mask that makes him more elusive to the audience. We don't truly know his true intentions, his true vulnerabilities yet. So his actions come across as significantly more threatening, for all we know he could truly just be that malevolent while at the same time - we have seen glimpses which prove otherwise, that he is vulnerable and does desire love, comfort etc. But we don't quite know what that vulnerability truly is yet.

But with Aemond it's fucking beyond on the nose having him laying in an older woman's lap, drinking MILK and having his head patted while being cooed upon. Like okay so now we know exactly what the fuck is wrong with him. And he loses all complexity (currently) because we've not been shown the progression of this drastically opposing character choice. We've gone from a dude who was licking his lips at the sight of Daemon slicing and dicing Vaemond, who was posting up to his kid nephews and literally denouncing Aegon for his sexual depravity - to homeboy needing mummy's milk straight off the back, no inner conflict shown. It would've been nice to SEE him actually struggle with this level of vulnerability. It would've been nice to see his character unravel to the point where that scene didn't feel like I've just skipped several episodes of characterisation. And yall can say what you want, but I am right on this. It would've been far more compelling for them to keep his mystique for longer, to keep that vulnerability of his hidden and watch him struggle with it. Because now I know exactly what the fuck he is thinking, exactly what is wrong with him. There is no ambiguity left in his motivations nor whether or not his whole black leather edgy boy thing is a mask. Because now we know it's a mask, so all of his choices don't feel as.... threatening? They feel more like an angry teenage boy who needs a hug. Which is totally fine, but it's more intriguing if it weren't so explicitly shown to us that's what he is. I'd rather that be woven into his character and his of mask edgelord666 not be so suddenly stripped from him? Because now I know he isn't a raging psychopath, now I he isn't driven by his chaos. With Daemon, he still gives the impression he genuinely might be unredeemable. And that should be the case with Aemond.

And while we are here, I fucken hated the line of the brothel Madame reminding him of the smallfolk.

1) What authority does she hold over him to essential give him council or reprimand him on his behaviour. Why does she have the confidence to council him in the first place given she is in a position of vulnerability. That's the paradox, he could absolutely have her killed or hurt her and face zero consequences. So what gives her the security in knowing he wouldn't respond negatively to being counciled on the political repercussions of his behaviour? Why have they not SHOWED US their dynamic? Because I'm going into this knowing Aemond is about to commit mass genocide against the smallfolk? So unless that comment was just a throwaway liner to set that up, why would she feel compelled to be direct in that way? Why would Aemond a man who actively does not give a SHITTTTT about the lives of those below him, let a brothel Madame get away with saying that? And since he did let it slide, WHY???? Show us WHYYYY he would accept that advice?

2) If that line was used as a recalling to Aemond potentially feeling regret for the choices he is about to make, then just cut the cameras. Cause I think that would be an absolute waste of his characterisation. Everyone already feels bad about the smallfolk. They are really hammering it home. Even Otto gives a shit about them. The last person I want to see care is Aemond. Because it just doesn't make sense, why the fuck would he care? He has no reason to care given the role he plays in the war.

I want to use Cersei Lannister as a point that you don't need to implement a sense of societal empathy for your antagonist to have softness within them. Cersei is like number 1 bad bitch, doesn't give a fuck, is a number 1 hater and will straight up blow a bitch UP. But we see glimmers of softness with her children, with Jamie and even Margaery. And I think that just makes her so much more intriguing because we know something else resides within her other than malevolence but we the audience have to watch her go through the motions of it.

So far I've seen Aemond go through ZERO motions and I've seen the writers play their cards already. I hope I'm wrong. But we have 6 episodes left of s2. And so far, I've learnt so little about him as a character, while also knowing exactly what his core wound is.

I'm a tad worried for s2, and I'm a tad worried that the short season lengths are forcing the writers to speed up the way they allowed these characters to develop. There have been some incredibly strong ass moments, like Otto being THAT bitch and telling Aegon what's good. That was unbelievably incredible. Literally the entire scene between Daemon and Rhaneyra. IMPECCABLE character work, IMPECCABLE acting 10/10. Oh and everything Helaena at the moment is also beyond perfect. That funeral scene was harrowing.

But the downsides have been huge. To me, Aemond is drifting into a territory which is making me kinda not enjoy his character so much. Cause now I know what's good, he doesn't compell me right now. Knowing what lies beneath the surface isn't always a good thing, espeically given he has had like maybe 40 minutes of screen time overall in the series. And Alicole suffers the same fate. It was implied in season 1, 100000%, but uhhhhh its jarring because we never got to see HOW it unfolded. The process that lead alicent and criston into this very complex reltionship. It feels like they've been fucking for years, yet it's been like two weeks on canonically? Oh and having the green siblings not interact after B&C is diabolical. That is fucking lazy writing. Sorry. Because they haven't mentioned the fact Helaena has had neither Aegon nor Aemond acknowledge her. Which again, feels so fucking out of blue? It doesn't even have to be a whole process, it could've been one scene where one of them attempt to comfort her and fail because they fundamentally don't know how to display that level of kindness towards one another. It's that easy. Oh and Daeron? Fuck off. That was an ABYSMAL way to introduce him. Why does Otto need to remind Alicent that she has another son? What grandfather says "remember that third son you've always had and have forgotten about for the past 6 years? *wink, wink*" Like fuck off.

I think they are suffering from too many ideas all at one. And trying to rush major character arcs in order to get to the dance. But what makes GRRM writing and works so interesting and what made GOT (early seasons) so good was the fact they took time to develop the characters and show those lengthy discussions/character interactions. It's ABSOLUTELY insane we haven't seen the green siblings interact properly and may not at all. There is no reason for that, you can't put it down to "dysfunctional family dynamics" if you don't SHOW us the dysfunctional family dynamic and the siblings failing at communicating. B&C would've been the perfect time to show the audience WHY they can't comfort each other and HOW their family system has failed them. It's so deeply unbelievable to me and getting the actors justify it as it being a poor family dynamic is LAZY. Show the audience. Don't have your actors tell us.

[asagirisfavpen]

I said it before and I will say it again. The one to be transferred to the Mafia is Fukuzawa. He's just the most fit for it.

It's not Dazai, because Mori is not stupid. Dazai rejoining the Mafia, especially through this agreement, would be the end of the Mafia. Besides, it would destroy his whole character and evolution.

It's not Yosano, Fukuzawa made it clear. That woman is not stepping foot in the Mafia's buildings.

It's not Kunikida, his ideals simply don't allow it. It would be stupid of Mori to choose him. Kunikida is not afraid to die, he would rather die than go against his ideals. And yes, I'm counting Kunikida as alive cuz I refuse to believe him or Kenji or Tanizaki or Teruko are dead. Asagiri is still a fucking coward.

It's not Atsushi either. He's supposed to be the good guy. The one that brings ppl to light not the one that moves to the dark. Besides, he's in the Mafia in Beast so I don't think he should be there in this universe too.

It's not Kyouka because a) she's useless for Mori now and b) Kouyou will personally kill Mori is he chooses Kyouka.

It's not Kenji, he just isn't. His ability is useless for Mori and his mind set is just not what Mori wants.

It's not Tanizaki cuz it's too obvious. He just said "then I'll go" and nobody protested or anything. This transfer is supposed to he something more (because of the lack of words) dramatic. Yes, his ability and down-for-murder attitude fit the Mafia, but it's just not him. It just feels wrong. I do agree he's second most likely to join tho. (Plus if he joins the Mafia literally every1 would mistake him for Tachi tbh)

It's not Ranpo cuz a) no ability, b) the second he steps foot in the hq the Mafia is doomed, c) he doesn't take orders, he's useless for the mafia and d) he's loyal to Fukuzawa until the day he dies and after. Any word he hears in there is going to Fukuzawa within 10 seconds.

I'm not even counting Naomi and Haruno in. Not even Naomi's bg that's coming now can make me change my mind on this. No matter how deep or dark their past is, they don't have abilities, the Mafia barely knows about their existence and Tanizaki would kill Mori if he chose Naomi.

And we're left with Fukuzawa. And honestly he makes most sense. Especially after this arc. Because he's not risking losing any of the ADA members after this. He's not risking it. Besides, he's a former assassin, his skill is wanted in the Mafia. His ability would be helpful for Mori, they could skip any possible ability trainings for new members. He's known Mori for a decade and he worked for him before as a bodyguard. (I lowkey think that Mori will use Fukuzawa as a bodyguard for a while just because he can, like beastzai did with Beastchuuya, but unlike Chuuya Fukuzawa won't give a shit. He saw it coming). And Natsume would definitely like Fukuzawa there to keep Mori "in check", to keep an eye on him. Plus, if Fukuzawa leaves the ADA, both Atsushi and Kyouka will lose control over their abilities and that would benefit the Mafia as the ADA would be even weaker.

And do y'all remember that episode/OVA when Aya first appears? Ranpo and Dazai said it, Kunikida is Fukuzawa's succesor. Why mention it if Fukuzawa keeps the position during the entire show? No, we will have Kunikida as ADA's president. And Chuuya was put there by Asagiri so the Mafia will know who the ADA's next leader is, so they'll know who they'll be fighting against.

In conclusion, Fukuzawa will be the one to be transferred to the Mafia after this arc ends. Argue with the wall

[trashcanwithsprinkles]

I'm turning jg over in my brain. So much. It's so good. Your talent at laying down plot threads and then creating long-arching follow throughs is genuinely second-to-none. I've been born in the correct generation I swear.

Related to that though: what's your writing process like?? Your plots are so interconnected and complex, how does planning for that work? Also, you write so quickly?? It's so cool?? How?? I'm flabbergasted?? My flappers are gasted.

Anyway I love you very much. Please take of yourself and have a great day

i uh- wouldn't know how to explain it lmao i just write. i guess the good memory certainly helps w keeping things in order? i do also have like- a notes document. sometimes it hasn't been a document, sometimes it was just the bottom of the fic back when i used google docs where i'd keep notes on plotpoints i wanted to happen and some things i needed to keep in mind. literally just an annotations bit

actually come to think of it cyanide only had like- a single paragraph of annotations. which is fucking wild given the size of jadeite's annotations? but the problem with jadeite is that i learned my lesson from cyanide in that i always fucking- lose count of how many days have passed in-story??? so i've started doing a day counter, which is somewhat working as a skeleton for the story even tho it's- not really much,, probably another reason why jadeite's annotation page is so long is bc it's somehow more convoluted than cyanide, plot wise. like i know cyanide was convoluted af but at the end of the day there was only a couple of things to keep track of. like it was only one plotline, three if you want to argue (you wouldn't be wrong), but only one main one all the time. not with jadeite lmao there's like 10 plotlines going on simultaneously in this beast

(the fact that i switched to another writing program that lets me make tabs per work may have enabled me to keep a dedicated anotations page that i can just have handy. that's also probably why)

also i don't think itysg had an annotations page. i uh- wrote that straight through beginning to end like a maniac w little to no backtracking

not sure if i'm actually answering the ask w this LMAO i think it helps to keep like- i always write w the ao3 fic open on a different tab, sometimes in 'entire work' and sometimes per chapter, when i want to back-check some stuff,, ctrl+f saves lives.

as for the actual plot- god i'm sorry it's just cause and effect for me. idk how to explain it. to me it's like you're asking me why 2+2=4. A happens so B happens so C happens. A wants this so they do B and that causes C to do D. genuinely at a loss for how to answer this my bad hahah;;,

as for the speed- i'm just a fast writer and my brain has never known peace

[zerofuckingwaste]

Easy zero waste tip no. 6: Find out what caffeinated beverage you actually want/need, then learn how to make it; aka "The Starbucks Lie"

Tl;Dr: You may be misinformed about how coffee actually works, leading you to purchase beverages that you may not actually like, that may not serve the purpose you want them to serve, and you can save money (and the environment!) by learning to make something you'll actually like at home.

Last week, I went to Starbucks to get a pumpkin chai latte, because I'm not perfect and needed to fulfill a craving on a bad day- but at least I used a reusable cup. Anyhow, while I was there, I witnessed the following conversation, not for the first time, nor the last, which I'm sure is commonplace:

Barista: What can I get you?

Customer: Do you have a dark roast? I like my coffee dark.

B: We just have a medium roast ready, but I can do a dark roast pourover.

C: Nah, that's not going to be enough caffeine for me, and I need drip coffee, not anything fancy. I'll have an Americano, then- espresso beans should be high enough in caffeine!

Now, if this seems like a reasonable exchange, that's ok- you're likely not a trained barista, and even if you are, there's a chance your training was at least a little bit wrong. Let's walk through it point by point, to explain why this exchange made me want to tear my hair out of my head.

"I like my coffee dark!" Most likely, this is false- studies have shown that people are most likely to say they want dark coffee, when they actually most enjoy a lighter or medium roast. Darker roasts are bitter, partially due to having more tannins- which is why they can cause more side effects, like headaches and digestive issues.

"Not enough caffeine" In fact, the longer (darker) you roast coffee, the more caffeine it loses. If you want a highly caffeinated beverage, you should opt for the lightest roast available.

"I need drip coffee, not anything fancy (pourover)" Pourover is essentially a method of making drip coffee one cup at a time. No machine or anything, it's the least fancy coffee option possible.

"Espresso beans should have high enough caffeine" The beans used for espresso are the same as the beans used for the drip coffee- they're just ground more finely before going through the machine.

"An Americano [...] should have enough caffeine" An Americano is a double shot with hot water, about 160 mg of caffeine if you're getting a 'grande'. A drip coffee that same size is over 300 mg.

This man claimed to love coffee, but didn't understand anything about it, leading him to pay $4.39 for 160 mg of caffeine instead of $3.28 for almost double that- keeping in mind that number could easily have been doubled again had he opted for the lighter roast. So, let's fix that.

1. Light or Dark Roast?

Have you ever wondered why Starbucks has a medium roast, the Pike Place, as their go to roast all the time? It's because it's the most middle of the road, bland option, completely inoffensive- not very good, but also, not too bad. It's a blend from a bunch of places, so there's no overwhelming flavor besides coffee with a slight hint of being burned. That burn taste everyone complains about, btw, is a result of the roast being too dark for them, hello tannins!

A lot of things happen to coffee as you roast it. Let's go through each point one by one:

The color changes. The darker the roast, the darker the roast- literally. This is best gauged with ground coffee, where you can see the average of the whole bean, not just the outer shell.

The mass decreases due to a loss of moisture. However, the bean actually expands in volume due to the strength of the cell walls. In essence, the density decreases.

Oils seep out from inside of the beans, coating them, and protecting volatile chemical compounds that give them flavor.

The caffeine content is lessened the longer you roast.

With high heat, the Maillard reaction occurs. While this reaction is responsible for the lovely color and the viscous, dark flavor notes, it's also responsible for breaking down the citric and tartaric acid, which causes the sweet and fruity flavors to dissipate. It also breaks down chlorogenic acid, creating caffeic acid and quinic acid, aka bitter, bitter tastes.

High heat also causes caramelization of sugars- but at a certain point, those sugars start to burn away.

Taking all this into consideration, we can begin to figure out what kinds of coffee you'll actually like. One quick note: always get single origin coffees. Each region has its own flavors, and if you're only getting coffee from one spot in your cup, then those notes will be amplified for your enjoyment.

A dark roast will have less caffeine, a stronger coffee bitterness, and very simple, up front flavors: chocolate, nuts, smoke, wood, etc. (My favorite tastes like dark chocolate with a hint of hickory)

A light roast will have more caffeine, a lesser amount of bitterness, and very complex, more nuanced flavors: citrus, caramels, fruits, florals, etc. (My favorite tastes like blueberries and white chocolate, with notes of almonds)

No two coffees are alike. My recommendation is that you purchase a bag of whole beans from your favorite local cafe or roaster based on your caffeine needs, and try out different beans until you find one- or two, or five, or a dozen- that you really love.

One quick note- a much, much greater flavor difference can be found in aerobic v. anaerobic roasted beans. I recommend reading into this process on your own, it's fascinating- both of my favorite coffees are anaerobic roasts, as it happens.

2. How should I make my coffee?

I'm a big fan of the affogato. I'm a dessert for breakfast kind of gal, so it makes sense; a hefty double shot over a scoop of ice cream. Absolutely divine; I pretty much only do espresso for myself, although my partner greatly prefers French press.

The overall rule for caffeine in your coffee is that the finer the grind, the more caffeine you're going to get out of the bean. That being said, that doesn't mean the final product will actually have more caffeine than another method, as different ways of making coffee require different amounts of coffee grounds. Keep the ratio of grounds to water in mind for this reason. However, you must remember that the perceived strength of the beverage- the concentration of flavors- is not necessarily correlated to the amount of caffeine. I'll now go over a few methods of making coffee which can be 100% zero waste (assuming you compost those coffee grounds!).

Cold Brew- You either let grounds freely float in water, or let them steep inside of a little filter bag. Let it rest overnight, up to 48 hours. If you like your coffee cold, and not a lot of effort, this might be your best bet.

Pourover- You put grounds into a little filter over either your cup or a pitcher. Pour water over the filter and let it drip down. If you like having a calming morning ritual, this might be for you. Essentially the same as drip coffee, except you don't have to care about a machine.

French press- You put grounds in the bottom of the press, then fill with hot water, and let it steep for a few minutes, then press the grounds down. If you don't mind a little work every morning, waiting a few minutes (when you could prep your breakfast, perhaps) then give this a go.

Moka pot- You pour water into the base, then put grounds into the basket, then screw on the top. Place on the stovetop, and remove as soon as the coffee begins to come out of the spout within. If you like a strong cup but don't want to invest in espresso, this is a great option. The pressure is too low for it to be true espresso, but it's very good.

Manual espresso- This is a bit more complex. It will be the same as automatic espresso, except there's no chance of the machine failing for any electronic reason. You fill a little basket with grounds, then tamp them down. Water is brought to temperature, then pressed through the espresso at a relatively high psi. If you want espresso, this is the way. You can get an entry level (Flair makes several that are fantastic) or you can get something high end with a built in boiler (I have a La Pavoni with an attached steam wand, great purchase).

Automatic espresso- Essentially the same as manual, but the machine does the pressing for you. If you love espresso but don't want to do a lot of work for it, this is a great investment! If you can buy used, do- just make sure the brand is one that offers replacement parts.

There are plenty of other options, but these are a good place to get started, when figuring out what works for you.

3. Why do I want my coffee?

Are you looking for a caffeine boost to get through a rough workday? Do you want something sweet to accompany your breakfast? Are you just bored?

Figure out why you want your coffee, then tailor your morning experience to your needs. If you need a caffeine boost for a rough workday, maybe don't do anything time consuming- prepare a middle of the road medium roast cold brew for the week on Sunday, and go ahead and grab a glass in your hurry out the door each morning. If you want something sweet with breakfast, get a light roast and a French press, and make it part of the routine for the meal. If you're bored, do pourover with a dark roast into a funky mug, or learn to steam milk to make latte art.

Really, coffee is something lovely, that you should enjoy, without mindlessly spending money on something that's not even good. As a bonus, you can support local businesses (coffee roasters and cafes), develop a new skill, and better the environment.

[blueskittlesart]

This is kinda stupid but as a Zelda expert I wonder if you'd have any tips for me. I got BOTW like years ago bc I'm obsessed with all the content that came out of it but with a combo of general anxiety + the fact that I am egregiously bad at playing video games I have uhh barely played it. I kind of had the same issue with Stardew Valley of all games b/c the mines gave me anxiety until I was given tips for getting through them quickly. Now I really do wanna finish BOTW bc if I can finish then reasonably I should be physically capable of playing TOTK???

i think that botw can be a particularly overwhelming first play bc of the sheer size of the world and the lack of guidance, but just so you know most of that anxiety you're feeling is unfounded. despite how much it builds itself up in-game as having very difficult combat situations, botw is a relatively easy game in terms of combat difficulty, and you can actually avoid a good amount of combat altogether once you get off the plateau. like with almost any open-world enemy you can just run away and they'll eventually stop chasing you with no fight needed. but the open world enemies also become stupid easy once you get some halfway decent weapons and armor. i suspect you're probably just stuck in plateau purgatory where everything is hard by virtue of you having very few hearts and shit equipment. this is unfortunately the only segment of the game where you CAN'T really set your own pace and have to do things in a certain way, but there are only four shrines to complete and the second you complete them everything gets way easier, i promise. if you ARE off the plateau and still feeling that anxiety, it might be helpful to nail down some objectives to combat that open-world-endless-possibilities fear factor. i would suggest focusing on building up your heart count with shrines (you can find them pretty easily by climbing sheikah towers at night and looking for their orange glow) since having more hearts is going to make everything a lot less difficult for you in general (i wouldn't bother with stamina in early game, get a decent heart count first. at least 13.) as well as building up your armor and weapon stashes to a point where you're confident enough with menial enemies. getting as much of the map as you can in early-game is also really helpful because it makes it much easier to find and access points of interest like villages. you might try practicing archery or swordsmanship if you're really concerned about that element--there are several in-game training spots that you can utilize basically as much as you want in order to get the button combos down. then once you're confident enough in your abilities you can switch gears to the main quest (divine beasts!) and just remember, there's no wrong way to play video games and there's no penalty for deaths or failures. if link dies all the game does is drop you back into your last autosave, and botw's autosave is so good that you probably won't even lose any progress. no one is going to get mad at you if it takes you a few deaths to beat a boss. no one is going to get mad at you if you need to google walkthroughs to beat bosses or puzzles. your gameplay experience should be enjoyable, and whatever accommodations you have to make for yourself in order to make it enjoyable are fine! there's no reason to suffer through something that could be made easier just for the sake of doing it right.

[porcupine-girl]

Please watch Super Star Academy.

I'm going through my Twitter and saving threadfics and individual tweets I don't want to lose before I delete it all, and I discovered a thread I did when my sister and I were about 1/3 of the way through our watch of Super Star Academy - which is, unironically, my favorite show ever.

So I am reposting this thread here for posterity, and in the hopes that maybe it will get one or two more people to watch this magical, incredible show:

----------

My sister @ bitter_tea and I are watching Super Star Academy, a 2016 vehicle for the guys in X-NINE, Xiao Zhan’s boy band. This will be a thread of why you should drop everything and watch this show, which is on YouTube.

First, the basics: SSA is a… College? But could be high school? For teens with superpowers. The superpowers are determined by your zodiac sign (Virgo Leo etc, not Chinese zodiac). Our protagonist is a girl who’s a Virgo but doesn’t think she has powers.

Ok first off, in the second episode we suddenly leave the school and go into some telenovela shit where some guy is dying and his son has to be born a Leo to take over the company. Rumor is the kid was stillborn two months early.

Then his wife goes and… causes a car accident that doesn’t kill some other super baby and somehow she steals a baby but we’re not sure where she got the stolen baby? But it’s not the car accident baby bc we saw that one saved by its dad???

Then her dying husband names the stolen baby and THAT is the point where you realize this whole thing has been a flashback bc he gives the stolen baby XZ’s character’s name so he is Stolen Baby but somehow his mom was using an iPad back in like 1996.

So XZ is Stolen Baby and the leader of one of two rival gangs in the school. They are both gangs of rich kids, but his gang is the preps and the other one is the punks, which you can tell bc a) they have a rock band and play at the extracurriculars fair

b) The leader has blue hair and c) they go around proclaiming themselves to be punks

At one point the two gangs go head-to-head in a croquet match. Which is… the school’s main sport? Now we’re getting into what kind of show you’re actually watching here.

Also the croquet trophy is MADE OF CHOCOLATE and Protagonist Girl accidentally eats it during the match. No one notices of course, even though she’s sitting there in front of the entire full bleachers.

So Protag Girl doesn’t think she has powers, right? But the school principal happens to eat at the noodle shop she & her uncle run & the noodles she serves him move in funny shapes so he decides she does have powers and gives her an admission letter.

Which he sets right down on a lit stove.

When she points out that it’s burning, he whips another admission letter out of his jacket because he goes everywhere prepared to admit ten new students to his school.

Speaking of her uncle, at one point he’s like “remember what I told you happened to your parents?” And she recounts a story about them meeting on a boat and then her father dying when it sank and he’s like “yeah I lied that’s the plot of Titanic.”

When Protag Girl gets to the school, she’s taken to the Clothing Department, an upscale clothing store where all the students can pick out five outfits and two dresses. Ah, don’t we all remember our first trip to the college clothing department.

Then you never see anyone wear anything but the school uniform or a croquet uniform ever again. No idea where the evening gowns on display at the clothing department went.

But you see, it was a vital scene because this is where PG meets XZ! Because she accidentally goes into his personal dressing room and of course neither of them notices they’re right next to each other separated by only a thin screen until they put on each other’s pants.

So from then on she yells about him being a pervert every time she sees him but he’s the rich popular croquet gang leader so no one believes her, which is fair because she’s wrong.

Side note: I just realized that calling Protagonist Girl PG has the potential to be confusing because that is, in fact, my name. That’s ok, though, because I think it will just make this thread feel more authentic to the incomprehensibility of the show.

PG, you eventually learn, was saved by a little boy her age when she was about 10. She was hanging from a cliff for Reasons and he moved a big rock and pulled her up. He gave her his school badge (of the SSA elementary school) and she gave him her embroidered hankie.

At one point she becomes convinced that it was Blue-Haired Punk. He makes it very clear that it wasn’t him because He Is Punk and Punks Don’t Save People Apparently. But she continues to accost him several more times as if she thinks he’s just forgotten.

Each time she confronts him makes less sense than the last, which is great.

At one point she is walking home in the rain and some Asshole In A Sports Car splashes her with water. Then backs up and does it again. Then is revealed to be XZ and (in all apparent sincerity) is like “oh sorry I didn’t see you” even though he backed up to splash her again.

This matters bc he loans her some clothes. Later, she tries to return them and he’s like “ew no now that someone else touched them I don’t want them.” So she pokes him in the shoulder to make him take off his current shirt. Whatever you think he’s wearing under it you’re wrong.

(Unless you’ve seen this scene)

He is revealed to be wearing a Powerpuff Girls t-shirt. So she pokes that and he has to take THAT off. Luckily though this show is family-friendly so instead of XZ’s chest this reveals…

Another Powerpuff Girls t-shirt!

He and the principal were in the same Boy Scout troop and are prepared for all eventualities.

Meanwhile PG is making friends with a nice boy who is from her same poor neighborhood.We’ll call him Boy Next Door. I worry about BND because clearly she’s gonna end up with XZ but they’re leaning on PG/BND pretty hard so either he’s gonna get his ❤️ broken or he’s secretly evil.

He is in Regular classes instead of Elite classes and I have no idea what that means because I don’t think it ever actually tells us. He has super powers though? And I think PG is in Elite even though her powers still haven’t manifested?? And she’s not richer than him either.

So he’s not in class with her so she has to sit between her only two other friends, who are bf/gf and spend all class literally making kissy faces at each other. They literally say something like “oh yeah we do nothing but this deal with it.”

There a Big Competition coming up! PG has no idea what really is so neither do we. But one of the Mean Girls (who I haven’t even talked about) tricks her into signing up.

Which is terrible! Because once you’re signed up you CANNOT UN-SIGN-UP!! It’s not clear what the consequences are if you drop out, you just can’t.

At this point my husband said something like “oh, it’s the Triwizard Tournament” and we were like oh yeah haha but THEN the principal goes to announce who will actually be competing…

And this is determined by a glowing orb that spits out the names of some of the people who signed up. She is not chosen… but THEN… after it has spit out the number of people it’s supposed to spit out… it spits out another one! And it’s PG!!!!! Dun dun DUNNNNNNN

So now we’re sitting there yelling at the TV “Cheng Zhi’er didja putya name intha goblet o’fiyah!!!”

(That is her actual name, not Protagonist Girl.)

Side note about those Mean Girls: One of them believes herself to be XZ’s girlfriend but as time goes on it is looking increasingly unlikely that he is aware of this.

Also the product placement puts Wolong Nuts to shame. Everyone drinks these blue and pink drinks and at one point the Punk Gang is drinking them and Blue Hair is like “let’s pretend we’re doing an ad” or something &they all start smiling at the camera & extolling its virtues.

Then later there’s a whole comedy of errors I won’t get into with a pizza but the end result is that BND winds up sitting in PG’s noodle shop with some middle-aged lady he doesn’t know. They start talking about how awkward it is and then suddenly she’s like

“Well if it’s going to be awkward, let’s sell these backpacks instead” and turns to the camera to sell us whatever brand of backpack he’s wearing.

One night she goes into this room with a sign on it that clearly says it’s like a study lounge or something that belongs to XZ’s gang. Who have their own study lounge I guess. There are chess boards all over the place?

He comes in and she’s like “what are you doing here?” and I said to the tv “well it does belong to his gang” and he’s like “uh it belongs to my gang.” Through some contrived contrivances they wind up leaning over a desk almost-kissing.

Then somehow (this might not happen til they leave the lounge? I forget) she realizes he has her old handkerchief so HE was the kid who saved her. But she doesn’t like him now so she demands he give it back and then she chases him like… all night long or something

Like she’s still chasing him when it’s light out AND he’s changed clothes.

Then somehow she gets the handkerchief but somehow he’s replaced it with a FAKE HANDKERCHIEF that has some other phrase on it. Kids these days and their handkerchiefs!

In an earlier scene, her uncle is shown knitting in the noodle shop and the pattern in his knitting changes from ? to !! so we’re theorizing that XZ has the same needlecraft-changing superpower as her uncle.

Anyhow we’ve only watched like 8 episodes out of I think 30 (they’re very short though) and I’ve only covered like half the completely unhinged things that have happened so far. Much of what I haven’t explained is because I don’t actually understand wtf is happening.

It’s basically the best show ever produced, you should all watch it.

Now PG’s uncle is drunk-knitting over his shoulder

Also at one point in the middle of an episode, when we haven’t seen the uncle in several episodes, it randomly cuts to him knocking his glass of orange juice down and yelling “oh! My orange juice!” with absolutely no context or explanation and then they never speak of it again.

Also-also the bad guys put PG in a burlap sack, then XZ saves her and proceeds to use her (in the burlap sack) to hit the bad guys.

Basically this show just keeps getting better.

Oh! I forgot! The bad guys attacked XZ with Sissy Boxing and gave him orchid fingers! Don’t ask me to explain, you now know as much as I do.

[terapsina]

And those rarest of creatures...

My Top 10 Favorite Canon ENDGAME OTPs

(and I realize some of these will be a surprise because I haven't posted that much about them but... well, when everything is perfect and nothing hurts there's less need for venting... also a bunch of them don't align with my Tumblr heavy periods or precede them entirely, so...)

1. Parker and Hardison - Leverage

The absolute sweetest couple maybe ever. The way Hardison just... loves Parker, without ultimatums or impatience. Just there once she's ready to meet his feelings with her own. And Parker, knowing she's developed feelings for... 'pretzels' and admitting it in the only way she can initially. So good.

---

2. Aneela and Kendry - Killjoys

You give me two amoral queens, have them be evil and immortal, and have them fall in love? I was a goner from the word go. Giving them a sci-fi kid just added fuel to the fire.

---

3. Jo and Zane - Eureka

I shipped the 1.0 version too. But when they accidentally erased the original timeline and had Jo remembering being in love and nearly engaged and having Zane not? Damn. Talk about angsty ship bait.

---

4. Kensi and Deeks - NCIS: Los Angeles

Sunshine and gunpowder. Freaking made for each other and doing a proper piney slow burn. My jam.

---

5. Magnus and Alec - Shadowhunters

I mean. Do you think I could resist a grand wedding crash with a 'if your son wants me gone he's going to have to say it to me himself' with the widely grinning sister of the miserable groom going 'I invited him'? What am I, made of stone? (War of Hearts is tattooed on the inside of my eardrums).

---

6. Nico and Karolina - Runaways

Okay. But like, even beyond the flawless imagery of Gothic Witch Queen and Royal Heir of Sunshine and Rainbows... they were so captivating. So ready to sacrifice anything for each other's happiness. I love them your honor.

---

7. Xiao Lanhua and Dongfang Qingcang - Love Between Fairy and Devil

"Everything in this world is fate. Only love is not fate."

Talk about ripping out my heart. In a story built around two people more trapped by fate than anyone, they save each other by doing the one thing fate has no say over.

(I usually prefer my romances to be the B and C plots, but these two? They are the exception that proves the rule. This whole show is their love story and I was spellbound for 36 episodes straight).

---

8. Shawn and Jules - Psych

So. Much. Pining. And the inclusion of the cruelest 'I love you' known to man, because who doesn't love a good 'I've been shot, and the guy who shot me just let me call my girlfriend but I'm using the call to give out clues about how to find me, so I'm pretending you're Abigail, but he's listening and he wants me to tell you that I love you and I know... think... suspect... that saying it will hurt you, but I don't have a choice and I'm so sorry'.

---

9. Nikita and Michael - Nikita

They both know what it feels like to lose someone you love. Which is why the way them kinda having at least a scene a season where one of them thinks the other just got killed is brutal. But I live for the looks on their faces when they figure out they're wrong.

---

10. Korra and Asami - Legend of Korra

What's more fun than falling in love with the ex boyfriend's ex girlfriend? Nothing. They got me to stand up and pay attention right quick once I realized where this was going (and the finale was how I started watching reaction videos... it made me so happy watching everyone else cry, cheer and squee too)

[doubleddenden]

Thoughts on Uzumaki the anime, now that it has completely finished airing:

Animation be dammed, I think they needed to give more episodes so that proper tension could be built and it not just be a series of "wow that's fucked up- wow that's fucked up- wow that's fucked up-" over and over.

That being said, from a very casual fan and from the perspective of someone that doesn't like horror- especially cosmic horror- this was decent for me. It's not quite the animated classic I'm sure a lot of people wanted- especially for episode 2- but it is a decent popcorn with friends type scary, imo.

Episode 1 was probably the best for obvious reasons, but truth be told, I was probably more unnerved for the hospital scenes. Genuinely, I felt a moment of fear and uneasiness - the scenes of people eating the snails in ep 4 is close, but 3 really fucked me up for that one scene in particular.

I do feel bad for the people that probably got screwed over and the people that were really hoping for a master piece- and DeMarco and Adult Swim better learn whatever God damn lessons they need to from this, because AS and Toonami already have a bad rep for animated originals. In the case of Lazarus, a 13 episode series scheduled for next year that they claim ALL episodes will be directed by Watanabe, they better make damn sure that goes off without a hitch, or risk losing opportunities in the anime industry going forward.

As for Uzumaki's story as a whole- I think I really appreciate Junji Ito's simple "hey wouldn't that be fucked up" approach to creating with a very simple concept. Some things definitely feel not scary at all, in particular the twister gangs- except for when they reveal pseudo cannibalism. That's not even the spirals' doing- in fact, the strongest horror in this series comes not from the spirals, but from the people themselves losing their god damn minds and giving into depravity and chaos. More than any jump scare or super natural being, I truly believe the most horrifying things to write with are with people and the horrible things they do to themselves or each other, and Uzumaki captures that.

The ending mystery is intriguing- but while I do understand that horror stories and especially cosmic horror rarely have happy endings, I can't help but wish for it. I think the ending is certainly just as terrifying, and the lack of solution- the exhausted acceptance of horrors beyond your imagination and knowledge that it is doomed to repeat forever- that leaves a very uneasy feeling inside of me. I personally don't enjoy this feeling, but that's certainly just a matter of taste and not a reflection of story quality- it's a fine enough ending for the genre and delivers on its job.

I don't think I'll watch it again, truth be told. It's not a story for me, and that's fine- again, just my taste, as I'm not really a horror fan anyway.

I think the most compelling things going for this anime is A. The gorgeous animation in episode 1 and the overall inky black and white colors, which really help build an atmosphere that would be list with color imo, B. The amount of people going for the manga will definitely increase, and C. The genuine curiosity about the production- what went wrong, why so many studios and an inconsistent quality. Perhaps someday an answer will be given.

I'll be honest, I kind of prefer the shitty live action movie if for nothing else that it was actually hilarious.

Anyway I'll give it a 6 or 7/10. Again, not for me, could do better with pacing, and an inconsistent animation quality can take me out.

[vxmpyr-clxb]

☆ . . . LEARN THE ALPHABET WITH SAGE!

A is for — “And here I thought Jake would’ve been the first to lose a limb.” Playing COD and other shooting games with the boys.

B is for — "Bitches love me bitches love me-" Jake on live and going to ask Sage if she wanted to join. Only to open the door and hear her screaming the lyrics to a song. Jake immediately slamming the door shut after hearing her.

C is for — “¿Cómo te va? Ten cuidado. No te caigas.” Teagan randomly switching languages when speaking to the boys in a en-o’clock ep and not even realizing it for a good 20 minutes.

D is for — "DEEZ NUTS!...I'm sorry." Her on a live, and letting the intrusive thoughts win, pt. 1.

E is for — “EVERYTIME WE TOUCH I GET THIS FEELING!" Karaoke with Heesung, Jay, and Sage is chaotic to say the least.

F is for — "FUC-FLIPPING FONGTASTIC PENGUINS!" Teagan stubbing her toe on the counter in I-land.

G is for — "Get me out of here.." Sage looking towards the cam during a live, with Niki and Jake, like she's in the office.

H is for — "HEKVSFKJASK-" Her literally getting choked out by Niki when they were roughousing and him dragging her off the side.

I is for — "I’ve accidentally indulged in too much ‘me time’ and must now suffer the consequences." Sage leaving her room after 24 straight hours of gaming and just hanging out and almost falling due to lack of iron.

J is for — “Just take me out! I wanna go back to bed." The group playing paintball while on a variety show episode and Teagan standing in the middle of the arena with her arms open.

K is for — "Kill me and I'll haunt you for the rest of your days, Kim Sunoo." Enhypen playing Mafia together.

L is for — "Likeee- You can’t sit with us.” Enhypen playing a game on one of her vlogs where you have to guess the person they’re pretending to be.

M is for — “MONSTER ENERGY!” Playing that one guessing game with headphones and Teagan being absolutely wrong in her guess.

O is for — “One more week of being stuck here with this *bleeep* cabeza de mierda and you will find a dead body.” Sage whilst on i-land and the boys keep eating all her favorite snacks when she started her period.

P is for — “Please, for the love of Christ, stop throwing monopoly money like we’re in a strip club!” A clip from one of her vlogs on Enhypen's group game nights.

Q is for — "QUACK QUACK HOE!" There's compilation of Teagan accidently cursing in public on YouTube somewhere, I just know it.

R is for — "RAAHHHH!!” Sage randomly using British slang out of nowhere and the boys getting confused.

S is for — “Shit..Oh fuck!…Who said that??” Her in the background of one of the other’s lives and dropping something and cursing.

T is for — "This is our village idiot—" Sage showing off her family pet, Rex, in a vlog.

U is for — "Ur joking.. Ur joe-king." The girl mimicking that one tiktok trend and dying of laughter on live.

W is for — "WAKE UP IN DAY ONE!" Shouting the lyrics to their song during a karaoke challenge.

X is for— "XYNDNDK” The girl falling out of her chair while laughing in an en-o’clock episode.

Y is for — “Yang Jungwon, I know you are not killing people without me!!!” Sage messing/joking with Jungwon when they all played Among Us together.

Z is for — "Zesty? Girl what.." Sage reading comments on live and laughing at goofy ones.

should really be named sage can't stop cursing pt.1