#(but also don’t actually wanna know because like I said. he’s just slightly too young for me and it feels weird)

[gingerwerk]

Devastating news folks- the work crush I thought i was 100% is not actually over because I saw him today and I regret to inform you he looked really good

[dumbseee]

saviour.

todoroki shoto x fem!reader.

genre: just tooth rotting fluff!

warnings: bad english/grammar :p

words: 2,3k

_

shoto was new to all of this.

pain and sadness was all he knew while growing up, he absolutely despised his father, he even hated calling him that. his mother also hated him, well that’s what shoto believed, seeing his two siblings was the only good part of going home for the young boy.

shoto didn’t have any friends while growing up, his father thought it was a waste of time and strong heroes didn’t need friends. he put that thought into his youngest’s head, making him believe that he was unworthy of love and friendship. so when shoto joined ua, and met everyone, met you. his view on life took a drastic turn.

his first awakening was during the sports’ championship, you had cornered him after his fight with midoriya, resulting in the green haired boy to loose and spend the next few hours at recovery girl. he was surprised to see you, he didn’t expect you to come find him. he had to admit that you surprised him during the championship, he never deemed you weak but he wasn’t expecting you to go that far, respectfully though. you sadly lost to bakugo and his bad temper, but you earned everyone’s respect during that hectic fight.

"you’re holding back." you stated, bandaged arms crossed on your chest, you also had a bandage wrapped around your head and shoto wondered if you didn’t leave the infirmary too early. your statement took him aback, he frowned and glared at you. "mind your business." he started to walk away from you, slightly bumping your shoulder with his. you grabbed his bicep, making him look at you with widened eyes. "it’s your quirk, todoroki, not his. bakugo won’t be happy if he sees you holding back." you quickly let go of his arm, almost running away from him, you couldn’t believe you spoke like that to endeavor’s son.

but your words kept ringing into shoto’s mind. all his life, he addressed his fire quirk as his father’s quirk and his ice quirk as his mother quirk. he never addressed it as his, he never even thought about it belonging to him. his father had engraved into his mind that shoto and his abilities belonged to him. but you were right, this quirk might be a curse to shoto, but at least it belonged to him and only him. after that day, shoto kept looking at you in class, watching you from afar when you were having lunch with your friends and wondering why your words were still haunting him. why did he listen to you of all people? why you?

"hey todoroki! wanna go to the mall with us, after school?" you offered to the young boy. he looked up from his book, slightly surprised that you thought of him. "ugh? hell no! i don’t want icy hot to come with us!" bakugo screamed from his seat, his hands glowing with small sparkles. you rolled your eyes and used your air controlling quirk to make bakugo spin in the air, a funny sight, really. "well, i want him to come, so deal with it bakago!" shoto didn’t know why he felt something strange tug in his stomach when you said that. he looked at you for a minute before nodding, if you wanted him to come then he’ll come.

hanging out with his classmates wasn’t too bad actually, aside from bakugo’s getting them kicked out of a shop and kaminari attempts at flirting with some girls, shoto had a great time. at first, he stayed behind, silently walking and observing his surroundings, but his eyes kept coming back to you. you were talking with mina and jiro, throwing your head back as you laughed loudly, making the weird sensation in shoto’s stomach reappear. when you noticed that shoto was walking alone, you felt bad, you wanted him to feel included and you hated the fact that some classmates didn’t like shoto because of his closed off behaviour. you left your friends to hang out with shoto, hands behind your back.

you did most of the talking and shoto listening to every single word that left your mouth with attention. you made sure to avoid anything to do with his father or even the championship. you learned a lot about shoto, and he learned a lot about himself too. he liked soba, cats, going to the library, watching tv and late night walks. when everyone had to go their own separate ways, shoto grabbed your hand, making you blush, when he saw the red tinting your cheeks he frowned. "are you okay? why is your face so red? are you sick?" he put his hand on your forehead but your temperature was normal. "o-oh, uh… i’m just hot! it’s getting hot here, ehe…" you stuttered, mentally slapping you but also grateful that everyone had left and no one could see you embarrass yourself in front of shoto. "oh." he simply said, before holding a hand next to your face and activating his ice quirk, making the air cooler for you. "are you feeling better?" you could only nod, still shocked at his sudden action. "i wanted to thank you for inviting me today, it was… fun." he looked down, slightly embarrassed. but you could only think about how gorgeous he looked, with the sunset glowing behind him.

after that, you and shoto kept being paired up together, for a school project, during practice, even during the internship you crossed path with him. you got scouted by gang orca and you were going home when you saw mirodiya, iida and shoto being attacked by the infamous slain. of course, you immediately went to help them, flying in the air while you sneaked an attack towards the villain, slamming him against the wall, full force. "y/n-kun!" midoriya yelled, happy to see you but also very worried that another of his friend could get hurt. you landed next to the group. shoto didn’t say anything but his mind was going crazy, you shouldn’t be there, you should be at home or with gang orca. you should be safe. shoto couldn’t risk anything happening to you, he wouldn’t allow it. his eyes were focused on slain, but he couldn’t help the small glances he threw your direction, just to make sure you were fine. everyone ended up being okay, except a few scratches you got on your face. shoto wasn’t even paying attention to what his father was saying, he simply walked away, towards you. "are you okay?" he gently asked, eyes full of concern. you smiled at him and nodded, you were getting your face wounds treated. "of course! stop worrying for me." you slightly pushed his shoulder. but he couldn’t get rid of that damn feeling in his stomach, what if something had happened to you?

since getting close to you, shoto had felt a ton of new emotions that he couldn’t name. when you were next to him he felt hot but cold at the same time, he couldn’t think straight, his hands were sweating, he was stuttering when you were looking at him with your big doe eyes. shoto was lost to say the least. "fuyumi, i think i’m dying." he blurted out to his sister, while she was making dinner. the poor woman almost cut her own finger at her brother’s statement. "w-what?" the todoroki siblings sat down, fuyumi eager to know what was going on. she was also surprised to see shoto open to talk to her about himself, that never happened before he joined ua. "there is this girl in my class, her name is y/n." the blush of his cheeks when he said her name made fuyumi chuckle slightly. "i don’t know what’s wrong with me but whenever we talk or she’s around i feel something weird in my stomach, and to the contrary when she’s not around or talking to someone else i feel almost… sad? or angry when she’s talking with another boy." he said, his face and voice empty of any emotion. fuyumi was stunned to say the least, out of everyone in this house, shoto wasn’t the one she expected to fall in love. "shoto, she grabbed his face with her two hands, making the boy frown. you are in love."

in love. you are in love. these words kept ringing in his ears, haunting him when he closed his eyes to sleep. he heard them when he looked at you, in class. he couldn’t shake them away, he kept thinking about what his sister had said. shoto didn’t know anything about love in general, the only type of love he ever received were from his siblings and maybe his mother when he was still a baby. shoto never loved anyone because he didn’t know what it felt to be loved by someone. fuyumi made him watch a ton of romcom that night, so he could understand better. she felt bad for her little brother, she wanted him to be happy and understand that loving someone wasn’t a curse, it wasn’t something bad, it was something beautiful and pure.

"shoto! truth or dare?" mina asked, a huge smirk on her lips. the whole class stayed late at night at the dorms to play some fun games and spend more time together. they had gone through some pretty fucked up things since the attack at the training camp and bakugo’s kidnapping. "truth." he crossed his arms on his chest, drinking his cup of water. "do you have a crush on anyone here?" the poor boy almost died from choking on his water. "w-what?" he asked, looking at mina with pleading eyes, anything but this question. but mina saw right through his act and repeated the question. "um… shoto looked up at you, you looked like you were dreading this question and you were, what if your feelings were one sided? what if mina was wrong and shoto didn’t like you back? "i do." he mumbled but mina heard him, she jumped from her seat and winked at you. "i knew it! who is it?" shoto shoved her away from him and lowered his head. "one question at the time, ashido."

shoto made a ton of research on love and confessing, he looked it up on the internet, read blogs, listened to some podcasts and even watched a few romcoms, fuyumi had requested him. and it all came to one conclusion: he had to confess to you. but he didn’t know how! he still didn’t understand why he was feeling like that and saying it out loud was still hard so confessing to you? impossible. but shoto had to do with, he wanted you to know and he wanted to know if it was one sided or not. he wouldn’t be mad at you if it was, after all, he had nothing for himself except childhood trauma and issues. "ashido, where is y/n?" he asked the pink girl, she blinked at him and immediately jumped out of her seat. "oh my god! i knew you liked her!" she jumped at his neck and hugged him tightly, making shoto panic slightly as he wasn’t used to pda. "sorry~ mina had noticed shoto tensing at her touch, and backed away. "anyways! she’s outside with jiro and momo, who knew you were that much of a romantic!" she beamed and shoto couldn’t be more lost. "what do you mean?" mina couldn’t believe this guy. "today is white day! boys are the one to confess to their crushes with flowers, chocolates, anything! what did you get for y/n?" shoto’s eyes couldn’t be more wide at mina’s words. he didn’t know today was white day.

you were having lunch with jiro and momo on the school’s little park. it wasn’t too crowded with students which you enjoyed. "seriously yaomomo, how many confessions have you received?" jiro rolled her eyes at her friend’s huge pack of letters, chocolates and flowers. "tons. i don’t even know how i am supposed to get these home." she blushed, which made you laugh. "don’t laugh, y/n! you got a lot too!" she added, pointing at your bag full of letters. you sighed while looking at them, you may have received a lot of letters, none of them were from the boy you loved. "oh, todoroki?" jiro looked behind y/n, making you turn to see. and there he was, shoto was sweating and panting as he was holding something behind his back. you stood up, concerned for him. "shoto? are you-…" he cut you off, handing you a bunch of flowers, who seemed to have been picked out from the school’s garden. "for you." his cheeks were flushed and he couldn’t look at you. "i like you, y/n. a lot, but i forgot today was white day so if you consider that i am not worthy of your love, i understand. you deserve someone who won’t forget such an important date." he finally looked at your eyes and you swore your heart would stop beating. you grabbed his flowers, tears starting to burn your eyes as you smiled. "idiot." you mumbled, before jumping in his arms while jiro and momo clapped and cheered for the love birds.

shoto was grateful for a lot of things in his life, he was grateful for his professors, who helped him improve and learn more about his quirk. he was grateful for his friends who made him understand that friendship wasn’t useless and was one of the most beautiful thing to experience. he was grateful for his siblings who always stood by his side. and he was grateful to you, for saving him.

he wanted the world to know that there was a woman named y/n l/n, who saved him by making him realise that he was worthy of love.

[n04hfiction]

Girl Dad Huskerdust HCs

Content/Warnings (If applicable) : fem!implied reader, profanity, daughter!reader goes to the age ranges of a young toddler to a teenager, brief mentions of alcohol + profanity

Proofread? : ✅

A/n : I think it’s a serious problem that I have parental HCs for nearly every Hellaverse character. I need to be stopped. (Or don’t, I don’t care)

Honestly, depending on your age, the “stricter” father definitely flip-flops here and there

For instance, when you are a young child, Angel is the “stricter” father, even if you don’t have the concept to understand what that entirely means, he’s the one who baby-proofs every thing while Husk kinda lets you run wild

But as you grow and get into your teen years, Angel becomes a lot more laid back, while Husk tends to be more picky about what he allows you to do

Mainly because Husk never imagined himself as a father, so in the beginning, he is sorta unsure, so for him, anything goes, but as you start to age he gets a grip and with that, comes strictness

When you are a younger child, Angel is 100% dressing you until you decide to do that on your own (part of him hopes you’ll let him dress you forever). He’s very protective of you when you’re a toddler/younger child, Hell isn’t always a safe place, everything even slightly unsafe or tempting is gated or baby-proofed

As you age, like I said, Ange is much more lenient. He’s ready to watch you rock the world! Wanna go out to a party? For sure! Be home by 2, go nuts! Have a crush? Great! Your old man will help ya out! Wanna get drunk as fuck? Fine, just do it in the house!

Honestly, Husk is a bit of a confusing father, to say the least. He’s lowkey freaked out by the idea of toddlers and younger children, so when you’re in your first few years he lets Angel take the lead, he kinda watched and observes his behaviors.

Which leads Husk to being more cautious of a parent as an adult (Learned from his hubby, that’s for sure). Even though him and Angel are far from over, he’s still very cautious about the idea of love, so he’s very sketchy about your relationships with boys (or girls! He doesn’t judge!)

When events like your first day of school, first boyfriend/girlfriend/partner, first heartbreak, homecoming, prom, etc - You may think Angel is the one to get emotional, but it’s actually Husk - Angel is just as excited as you are, getting you dolled up and whipping out his camera to take pictures, but deep down, Husk is honestly sad that his baby girl is growing up - Especially cause he was too tense in the beginning to really enjoy your younger years

Seriously though, Husk is happy you’re a bit older, he feels like he’s able to have more of a connection with you. He likes it when you come to the bar and just sit there and talk, even if you’re only drinking a juice box.

Husk still doesn’t know how to talk with a teenager all that well, but he’ll ask you how school is, and how you’re friends are, he wants to show that he takes a genuine interest in the other aspects of your life.

Angel on the other hand is very eager to walk with you through your teenage years, he’s the dad that all of your friends think is cool as fuck, but you think he’s crazy embarrassing. He’s the kind of dad to also be friends with your friends. He’ll come in your room during sleepovers and do your friends makeup, skincare, nails, ect

Despite the fact that Angel does pretty much let you run wild once you get older, he’s very strict on safety, in every aspect. - He doesn’t want you to get fucked over like he did, and he doesn’t want that to destroy you, he really does try his best to guide you on a different path, any path that isn’t the one he fell down

[e-dubbc11]

you said you could be persuaded to write about dean sooooooooo what about retired dilf dean? 🤔

My dear sweet Selene, it’s very hard for me to say no to you. 🤣 I came up with a little something for DILF Dean Winchester. I hope you like it, thank you for challenging me, my lovely friend ♥️♥️♥️

Carrying On

Photos are not mine. They are courtesy of Pinterest/Google.

Pairing: Dad Dean Winchester x F! Reader

Warnings: Couple of swear words, fluff, mentions of readers father’s death, smooches, a little hunter violence

Word Count: 1.7K-ish

Summary: You just bought a house in a new state, trying to see if you can move on after your father’s untimely death. Your neighbor introduces himself and already you’re feeling more at home

A/N: So this is my first time writing for Dean, dear god I hope it doesn’t suck. I wanted to write more for this but I still have asks in my inbox for my sleepover I need to get to(I’m trying my hardest to answer them all, I thank you all for your patience.) I’d even be willing to do another part for this because I had fun writing this one! I hope you like it! ♥️

As always, thank you for reading!  I appreciate it so much and comments, reblogs are welcome and encouraged. Don’t be shy to tell me your favorite part. 💕💕 💕

The house was at the end of a nice quiet street. Your suitcases were piled high in the back seat, almost too high to see out the rear window but it wouldn’t be for much longer. It will be nice to finally stretch your legs after being in the car for such a long drive.

When you pulled into the driveway, you noticed that the “For Sale” sign had been removed from the front lawn. This was your home now and you were determined to live your life as normal as possible from now on.

After your father passed away, you left the flat lands of Oklahoma for the mountains of Colorado. There was just something about that cool mountain air. But you didn’t want to live IN the mountains, you didn’t want to be alone so moving into a neighborhood NEAR the mountains was a good compromise.

A man and, what you assumed to be, his young son were playing catch in the front yard. The boy tossed the baseball to his father but the man wasn’t paying attention. He was too busy looking at your car which happened everywhere you went.

You and your father had rebuilt that car and restored it to its former glory. It was your dream car…a 1967 Pontiac GTO in midnight blue. The way the paint reflected the light, the car almost looked purple. It was a gorgeous car.

The car in your neighbor’s driveway was impressive also. It was a 1967 Chevy Impala, black.

“DAD!! You missed!” The boy shouted.

“Hold on, son. You see that car? She must be our new neighbor. Let’s go say hello.” The man said.

Reaching for the sky, you stretched until some of the tightness in your shoulders went away. You then saw your new neighbor.

“Fuck me.” You whispered under your breath.

He was very handsome with medium brown hair, a well-groomed beard, and green eyes. As he came closer, you saw a splash of freckles across his nose and his young son was a carbon copy of his father.

You smiled warmly as they came closer.

“Hi there! I’m your new neighbor. I’m y/f/n y/l/n.”You extended your hand to shake his.

After you introduced yourself, the man had a slightly confused look on his face that quickly disappeared.

He extended his hand for you to shake. “I’m Dean and this is my son Charlie.”

“It’s really nice to meet you.” You said.

Charlie interjected himself. “Dad missed the ball because he was staring at your car.”

“Charlie…” Said Dean through clenched teeth.

“Ah, well I do get that a lot. You wanna sit in it?” You asked.

Charlie’s eyes went wide. “Sure!”

You opened the car door so Charlie could sit on the driver’s side.

Dean pointed at the car. “That is a nice car. ’69?” He asked.

You bit down on your lower lip to keep from smiling. “It’s a ’67 actually, like your Impala.”

“Impressive…I don’t know a lot of women that would know that to look at it.” He said.

“Well, we do exist.” You said, a little sarcastically.

Dean smiled at you and said softly. “Yes, I guess you do.”

When he realized he was staring, he quickly snapped out of the trance he was in.

“Um, yeah so um, do you have furniture coming or anything? I’m happy to help.” He said.

“Oh the moving truck is coming tomorrow so I just have the bare essentials for tonight. Thank you for the offer, I may take you up on that.” You said.

“Well, we’ll let you get settled. Just knock when the truck comes…Charlie!! Come on, let’s let y/n settle in to her new house.” Said Dean.

As they walked away, you heard Charlie tell his dad, “Dad, you were staring at her.”

Dean narrowed his eyes and furrowed his brow. “No I wasn’t…get the ball.”

“Yes you were, Dad. I saw you.” Said Charlie.

You shook your head back and forth then smiled. They both seemed really sweet.

Three Months Later

You had settled nicely into your new home. The final box had been unpacked and you were adjusting to your new surroundings and your new neighbors. Although there was something that bothered you about Dean’s house.

Every so often, not a lot but every now and again, you noticed that the basement light would flicker. It wasn’t all the time but when it did, it was always at the same time, which you thought was strange.

Everything else seemed to be fine so you didn’t look too closely at it.

You really did like Dean and you adored Charlie. They were your friends, so you contemplated, at least telling Dean about your past, how your father really died, and why you left your home state.

One Saturday morning, all of the windows were open and you could hear music coming from their house. It sounded like…Asia – Heat of the Moment.

You giggled a little bit and thought to yourself, “Really Dean, Asia?”

Dean had a deep booming voice.

“Rise and shine, Charlie!!” He said, loudly but playfully.

After doing some housework, you heard a knock on your door. Walking down the hall from the bedroom into the kitchen, you saw Dean standing at the side door through the screen. He was leaning against the door frame.

“Hey there. What can I do for ya?” You asked, opening the screen door.

“Hey, I was wondering if you’d like to come over for dinner tonight? I thought maybe we could tell Charlie, um…well, about us.” He said, shyly.

Charlie didn’t know that about a month after you moved in, you and Dean started to hang out with each other after he went to sleep.

He’d come over for a drink, sometimes a movie, or a lot of the time, the two of you would just talk, and the relationship just sort of happened.

Charlie’s mom had passed away three years ago and it had just been the two of them since then. Obviously you weren’t trying to get in the way of their relationship and you DEFINITELY weren’t trying to replace his mom but you really did like the both of them and Charlie deserved to know the truth…they both did.

You snaked your arms around Dean’s neck, let your fingers run through his soft brown hair, and leaned in to kiss him. The bristles of his beard tickled your chin and you smiled in between his kisses. You really were smitten with him.

“I’d love to…I’ll bring you guys a special dessert.” You said.

A shy smile extended across Dean’s face. “Awesome…oh and I’m not much of a cook so I hope you’re ok with burgers. Alright? Ok, good talk.” He said, as he smacked you on the ass and turned around to walk back home.

You were going to come clean tonight.

Walking over to Dean’s, you remembered the first time you saw the last name on the mailbox…Winchester. Dean Winchester. All hunters knew that name, that family, his brother Sam, their father John, and their mother Mary.

They were famous in the world of hunting. Your family name stayed under the radar. Sure, you and your dad had some pretty big hunts and cases but nothing compared to the Winchesters.

Charlie answered when you knocked.

“Y/n!!!” He said, excitedly.

“Hey buddy!” You replied.

Charlie saw you holding the pie in your hands.

“Oh you brought Dad’s favorite.” He said.

“I did? Well I hope you guys like it, I made it from scratch.” You said.

“Dad’s always eating pie…he’s out back, come on!” He said, tugging on your t-shirt.

The three of you had a nice dinner together filled with a lot of laughs and you breathed a sigh of relief when Charlie said he was ok that you were his dad’s girlfriend.

The child like smile Dean had on his face as he was about to taste the pie made you smile. Before he could take his first bite, the lights flickered.

He looked up at the kitchen light as it continued to flicker. “Son of a bitch.” He boomed.

“Dad, language!” Shouted Charlie.

“Not now, Charlie.” He growled.

You stood up and backed away from the kitchen table. “Where’s the salt, Dean?” You asked.

“What? How do you--?” He started to say.

“The salt, Dean…NOW!!!” You shouted.

Dean got the bag of salt from underneath the kitchen sink and you had Charlie stand in an open area in the dining room, while his dad drew a salt circle around him. Then he pulled out two shotguns from underneath the couch in the living room filled with rock salt.

“Charlie…buddy, don’t move from this spot, do you understand?” You asked him, looking into his scared eyes.

He nodded.

Standing back to back, holding the shotguns, Dean asked, “Is there something you wanna tell me?”

As fast as you could, you explained yourself. “Ok, so I come from a family of hunters too, nothing like yours of course but I left Oklahoma after my father died saving me from a nest of vampires. It was just me and him, my whole life and when he died, I felt like I couldn’t hunt without him.” You said.

Low moans and hisses were emanating through the walls as the lights continued to turn on and off.

“I can’t believe you’re a hunter. That’s why when you introduced yourself, your name sounded familiar to me!” Shouted Dean.

Charlie stood petrified inside the salt circle. “Dad, what’s going on?”

“It’s alright, buddy. We’re gonna be alright.” Said Dean.

Two apparitions came through the wall and headed straight for you when you blasted them with rock salt.

“Are y-you m-mad?” You asked, while trying to catch your breath.

“Mad? I’m only mad that I didn’t get to eat my pie! As far as you being a hunter, well…I gotta say I’m a little turned on.” He said.

In the middle of a life or death situation, Dean managed to make you blush.

“What does that mean, Dad?” Asked Charlie.

In unison, you and Dean yelled, “Not now, Charlie!”

“When we’re done with this, we’re gonna have a talk.” Dean pointed his finger at you.

“But you’re not mad?” You asked with a slight smile.

Dean smiled at you, his bright green eyes looked like fresh blades of grass as he leaned in to kiss your forehead.

“Nah, I’m not mad sweetheart. Now let’s kill these things so I can eat my pie.”

Tagging: @munsonownsmyass @gijos

[kaiyunsim]

HEART IN THE MARGINS — chapter 3 : tutor !

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚ ˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚ ˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚ ˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚ ˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚ ˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚ ˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

written chapter (w.c : just over 750) - not proof read

You sigh, walking through the halls of the school, passing many rooms before arriving in the room you and Jake both agreed to meet up in. If it weren’t for Sunghoon, you wouldn’t even have to come in contact with the person you despised for so long. Despite the circumstances you still pushed through with a half smile, entering the library.

Jake sat at a table that is practically isolated, materials prepared and books out. He had his phone out, likely scrolling social media, passing time while awaiting his anonymous tutee’s arrival.

You pull out the seat in front of the young man, catching his attention before sitting down. He puts away his phone as you lay out your things.

“Are you here for me?” Jake asks, softly smiling which radiates a positive energy.

”Jake? right?” You ask, making sure you get the right person. After all, you never seen Jake in the flesh, just his name either below or above yours on the grading sheet.

“Yeah, and your name?”

”Y/n,” you reply, somewhat mumbling.

”Wait. You’re y/n? THE Y/N? Why would you need tutoring?” Jake asks, he was surprised. The person he would always compete with was actually asking help from him.

“I kinda failed the last test…” You reply as you scratch the back of your head. A wave of awkwardness and embarrassment crashes into you as you have to admit you need help.

Jake giggles to himself before calming down and starting his lesson with you.

“Wow, that's some blackmail that I'm going to use now” His accent catches your attention. You admit to yourself that it’s kind of cute.

You begin to regret telling him who knows that he’s going to do with that information,

“You better not,” You say, a tone of annoyance can be heard with it. You already didn't want

The more and more his lesson continues your start to notice some other things about him that aren't that bad. It slipped your mind of course as you were more focused on learning. His lessons are also really easy to understand. Like the material you have been studying for that took you a week to understand could be comprehended with a 2 hour session with Jake. He checks the time and it's been exactly two hours on the dot. His stuff was already packed and ready to go, you must not have noticed probably because you were too invested in the session.

“Well, that’s it for our first session i guess,” Jake says while getting up from his seat, dusting off his shirt in the process.

“First? There’s more? I thought there would only be one,” You responded, slightly surprised but not in a bad way. It’s not like you minded, after all he really helped you out with your work.

”We’re only 1/4th the way through the material…” Jake said with a slight smirk, “Besides, I'm sure you wanna check me out some more” Jake teases, smirking. He noticed you staring, especially when you should be looking at his notes.

You looked at him with an expression that showed your embarrassment. Despite his excellent teaching results and somewhat attractive looks, you wouldn’t want to be caught dead by anyone knowing that THE Jake Sim tutors you.

”Well, don’t expect me to come back for more,” You scoff, obviously annoyed. You pack your things and begin to stuff them into your bag. You quickly take out his payment for the service.

”C’mon y/n don’t be like that” He jokingly pouts which eventually turns into a sly smile. His posture had a teasing feel to it as his elbows remained on the table and head rested on his hands. “Who doesn’t want to be tutored by the one and only Jake Sim?”

”Jesus, can you not? Just leave me alone. I did your tutor shit, now I don’t have to do anything else.”

Jake gets up from his seat grabbing his things and slides a folded piece of paper towards you, “I’ll think about it, see ya later”

Before you even get to respond he leaves and you’re left there with your half packed belongings and that stupid piece of paper. You unfold it and it reads ‘my number xxx-xxx-xxxx, text me for your next session’

You notice there is another fold and you begin to unfold it, ‘you better come. your rep is on the line ;)’ You were so annoyed when you read that. You could imagine his mocking voice as if he was saying that to you right then and there. You could already tell he was going to have a lot to deal with.

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a/n : sorry for be ia for so long. life has been busy and motivation + inspiration has like been low but i think its starting to come back. also i decided to make the rest of the smau gn!reader because it’s easier to make.

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taglist : (OPEN !)

@onlyhyunjin @starchasing-cryptid @bubblztaro @kanattac @nootnootpinguuu @gnusihcom @kkurbys @wh0evenareu @ilovejungwonandhaechan

[synthetictorii]

Rumors ✧ Toshinori Yagi

Pairing: All Might/Toshinori Yagi x reader Genre: angst Summary: You've been called a lot of names, more than you can count. You've grown used to it - but your lover hasn't and it's about time it stops. Word count: 3.3k A/N: ...obligatory old and cringey fic ahead warning... + this was a wattpad rq

     You always lived your life in a way that made you feel like a side character of your own story. That was just you were content, putting others on the first place while forgetting about yourself. You were constantly trying to satisfy everyone, to help in any way you could. Many people told you that you were too kind for your own good. They were absolutely right, but you only felt satisfied when you behaved that way. You were happy only when everyone around you was smiling. Your way of thinking and behaving often caused you to be easily overlooked, this was also fine with you. You avoided attention as much as possible.

  Then it’s understandable why it was very surprising for you to wake up one day to find photos of yourself all over the news and in TV. Magically, overnight you became the talk of the town. Well, the only magic involved was the man standing right next to you on all of those photos. All Might. The symbol of justice and peace. The reports did a lovely job though, creating a beautiful collage tracking your yesterday’s date, your first “official” one. You turned the volume on as you curled up in your sofa. It couldn’t hurt to watch a bit, right? The show host was talking with the guests about each of them, guessing what was happening but they never got it quite right.

    The first picture was taken near the subway station where he was waiting for you with a single white rose, the same flower that was currently sitting in a glass on your kitchen table. You remembered times when a whole bouquet of flowers used to be there, sighing happily. Toshinori finally listened to your pleas and settled for something simpler. You never were one to enjoy getting gifts, especially expensive ones, always feeling that the bond you shared with people was more important. Yet he wouldn’t hear of it. You smiled fondly. “White rose, because your love is just as innocent as the color.” He said yesterday while giving you the flower, a hint of pink colored your cheeks.

  The second photo was taken through a window so it was slightly blurred. It showed you laughing, hand covering your mouth while he was talking sitting on a chair opposite of you in a little café, making grand gestures. It was a good one. They caught the moment when he was telling you about his students at U.A. You especially like to hear about one kid named Bakugou, he seemed to be quite a madman. You missed being their age, it was strange to feel like this when your age still sported the twenty in it but in your defense, things were easier then. You wouldn’t turn back time if you had the chance though, you were satisfied with your life the way it was now, especially with a man like Toshinori by your side.

  But surely enough, something had to go wrong the moment you thought just that. “They look like a happy couple, right?” said one of the guests on the show. You nodded, smiling from ear to ear. Well, you felt a bit guilty, agreeing without Toshinori’s opinion. Well, whatever, this once you’d allow yourself to be selfish and not care about his thoughts. “They do but you know what they say, even the sun sets in paradise,” said the host and the smile froze on your lips. You frowned and raised the volume, for once actually interested what do the people on TV have to say. “I don’t wanna spread rumors,” said the lady with a fake smile, “but there are some who feel like our dear All Might is only being used. I mean, I don’t want it to be true,” she huffed with laughter, “but she’s just so young, what else could possibly be her motivation? If she truly had feelings for him, she’d tell to wait for her until she learns how to take care of herself,” both the audience and guests bursted out laughing. “Yeah, I guess you’re right, like this was what I thought when I first saw-” you turned the TV off and threw the controller away. Your hands were shaking slightly in distress. How could they say something like this? Not once did the thought about his fame or money cross your mind. It was a thing that you literally couldn’t care less about! You shuffled on your spot nervously and bit your lip. You replayed all the occasions when someone looked at you yesterday during the date. Were they all thinking like this? Were they all against your relationship? You were prepared for some hate but not for this. You expected some mean comments but not for people outright saying you weren’t enough for him.

  Your pride or reputation wasn’t what mattered to you, even if it probably should, instead you were stressing about what Toshinori will think once he hears these rumors. You knew each other for over half a year but only started dating about two months ago, going out twice or thrice a week, always during late evening or night so you wouldn’t be constantly interrupted by his fans. Yesterday was a little test of sorts to see how it would go. Not well it seemed, you frowned bitterly, gently biting on the skin around your nails – a bad habit of yours when you were anxious.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

  He woke up well rested, actually feeling refreshed for the first time in god knows how long. His side didn’t hurt one bit and it was almost like before the incident. He whistled all the time during preparing his breakfast and coffee, his mind blissfully returning to yesterday’s events. When his ham’n’eggs was done and the bread was toasted, he set the food on the table and turned on the TV, eager to see what the media thinks about his relationship with you. Although he wouldn’t break up with you if they didn’t approve, public opinion was important to him – and also decided his pay check, so yeah. He clicked through the channels, always watching just for a while before checking elsewhere.  So far so good, the reactions were mixed as expected, but mostly it seemed alright. Then he hit the jackpot of hate. His grip on the fork got so strong he split it in half. Shit. This wasn’t good. You were sure to see this, you liked to watch TV in the morning to see what’s up in the world and he couldn’t guess how you’d react but he was certain you’d start worrying.

  He didn’t waste any more time, toast and a forkful of eggs laid rejected on the plate, and quickly changed into casual clothes he could were in his flexing form. He felt so frustrated and enraged by what he heard – how dared they gossip about you like that? You were the sweetest, kindest person he knew, if anything was supposed to taken apart by the news, it was how suspiciously perfect you were. He wasn’t able to count how many times he teased you for being too modest and, with relation to the rumors, how often he told to take advantage of having rich boyfriend. You wouldn’t hear of it! Yesterday was the same, he made attempt to pay for your coffee and cake but no, you paid for all the things you both ordered. Seriously, if he didn’t bring you flowers, you’d be the one in your relationship paying for everything – he was the one using you. He could only imagines the headlines if the media knew that.

  He rushed out of his apartment and jumped from roof to roof to reach your place sooner while attracting as little attention as possible. It didn’t take him long to arrive as you didn’t live too far away. He waited for a while until the street got empty and then he jumped on the fire escape staircase right next to your living room window. He saw you marching from one end of the room to another, freezing on the spot when he landed with a loud crack. It was a wonder the staircase withstood his little stunt. You turned around and he waved at you. He saw your features relax and gentle smile formed on your lips. You walked to the window and opened it for him to climb inside. “I have arrived, [y/n]! Now let me assure you that everything is alright!” He grinned widely and spread his arms for you. Your smile faded a bit as you gratefully hugged him, he pulled you close tightly, stroking your hair. “You were afraid, right?” He asked, his voice calm and patient. He knew that your feelings weren’t based on distrust towards him but rather your habit of underestimating yourself and he decided to be as supportive as he could in your fight with these feelings. You nodded into his chest, squeezing him harder. “You know, I think saying lies like that on public TV earned them enough of the villain status, want me to beat them up?” He gave you mischievous smile. You laughed and smacked his shoulder lightly. “You know how I feel about violence,” you chuckled and sighed. “I… I really don’t date you just for your money and fame, I swear,” you said, looking somewhat apologetically into his eyes. “I figured that much,” he huffed, almost pouting. He knew it never failed to make you all mushy seeing him act cute. Your giggling rang through the room as you reached up and raised the corners of his mouth with your fingers. “But it’s so nice to spoil you!” You said happily. He took your hands into his and kissed each of your knuckles before laying them on his chest, again holding your waist. “I want to pamper you too, young lady!” He protested while looking into your eyes. “It’s a man’s job to take care of his girl, isn’t it? So, let me take you out for brunch, my treat this time,” he shushed you before you managed to say anything. “I’ll wait here, unless you want me to help you change?” He flirted and you quirked a brow at him. “Is that what you want in exchange for the brunch?” You teased but laughed at the sight of his flushed cheeks and flustered gesticulation. “I’ll be right back,” you reassured him with a smile and gave a small kiss to his nose.

  He watched you run off and fondly sighed. How in the world did he deserve such ethereal creature like you? You were the perfect combination of cute and smart with a hint of flirt mixed in and he fell for you more each day. He stared longingly at the doors leading to your bedroom as if he could speed up the process of you getting ready. He tried hard not to imagine you in your underwear but boy, was it hard. Instead he sat on the sofa and turned on the TV with intention of getting more information about how the situation progresses. The conclusion was simple: not very nicely. Some other channels inspired themselves with the one he saw in the morning, throwing hate your way. It took every ounce of his self-control not to destroy the controller. “Are you sure you want to go out?” He turned to see you sheepishly playing with the hem of your hoodie, looking everywhere but at him. You were adorable beyond words. Your nicely shaped body was hidden under oversized [f/c] hoodie but your legs clad only in thin black leggings made up for it and hinted at your figure. He switched the TV off and made his way to you, stroking your arms. “The day I will say no will be my last,” he smiled and kissed the top of your head. “Then I hope you’ll live a long life,” you snuggled closer to him, enjoying the safety of his solid body whereas he appreciated your affection and nice words. It didn’t matter what happened, you always found the exact thing to say that he needed to hear or guessed what would help to make him feel better. It always left him amazed. Neither of you wanted to let go, however when your stomach let out quite a loud growl. “We should get going,” he suggested and this time you didn’t oppose him.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

  The walk was nice, the skies were blue without a hint of cloud and only a light breeze was blowing. You talked about everything and nothing, cracking jokes and laughing all the time. You clinged to his arm happily and momentarily forgot about your worries. This was the effect he had on you. Somehow with him by your side you could let go of everything that weighted down your mind and live in the moment. That’s the symbol of peace for you.

  However the peace was not supposed to last for long. Soon you were walking through busier streets than the ones near your home and people were staring. You remembered the words of the morning show’s host. She’s so young. All your insecurities hit you like a punch to the gut. You felt eyes of every single person around on you, burning holes into your soul.

“This can’t be true she’s not enough for him!” “Yeah, All Might deserves the hottest girls only!”

“What a joke, she’s still a child! Learn you place, girl!”

“Poor All Might, how can she be so cheap - using him without shame!”

“In my days it were boys digging gold!”

“Go back to high school he’s got more important job than to baby sit you!”

  You clenched your jaw, trying to ignore the ubiquitous whispering. You held onto Toshinori’s arm more tightly, afraid that someone will actually try to tear you away from him. He noticed your distress immediately. You knew from the way his muscles were tenser than usually, his features somehow looked sharper, his teeth gritted to the point of breaking as he tried to maintain his trademark smile. “Please, it’s alright, don’t... don’t make a scene,” you pleaded, voice barely above whisper. You were afraid it would only add oil to the fire and you didn’t exactly wish for more attention. You saw him nod and then his hand was suddenly no longer in your grasp but around your waist, pulling you closer. You smiled, thankful. “Not a word of that is true,” he reminded you with a stroke of his thumb over your side. “I know,” you sighed and closed your eyes for a moment, trying to blot out everyone staring at you from your mind and just focus on the positives. One, you were with Toshinori and he wasn’t fazed at all by the rumors. Two, he was as mad about the whole deal as you, meaning he cared about you just as much as you cared about him. Three, the man you loved with your whole heart was proudly showing you off to the world.

“There's no such thing as bad publicity, huh?”

“I don’t mind people with age difference between them dating, but isn’t she too young?”

“I hope he’ll dump her soon.”

“Be careful All Might, she’s no good!”

“Daddy kink alert!”

  The voices didn’t stop coming though and your boyfriend was getting visibly more and more upset. You bit your lip and laid a hand on his stomach, trying to bring him out of his thoughts. However your plan crashed as someone from the small crowd watching you two yelled, “Get your dirty hands off him, you sugar baby!” That was the last straw and all it took for Toshinori to snap. He stopped dead in his track. “Listen up everyone!” He shouted in his rich voice so loud that not even Present Mic would be ashamed of it. He gently pulled you in front of him and rested his hands on your shoulders. You backed down only to be met with his firm chest. Okay, this could do. He cleared his throat and scowled at everyone present at the moment. You noticed some cameras filming the whole scene from the corner of your eye too.

  “This is [y/n], and we’ve been dating for months now,” his voiced was calm, although he was not. Hearing your name come from his lips in the public, introducing you to his fans, made you blush a deep shade of red. He noticed and chuckled fondly, quiet enough for only you to hear. “I, All Might, am thrilled to share my life with this amazing woman and I would appreciate if you all could be more supportive of our relationship,” his hands gently squeezed your shoulders in attempt to ease your nervousness. He couldn’t imagine how difficult it must be for you to face all these unknown people, but he hoped he provided at least a little support. “[y/n] is the sweetest person I’ve ever met, angels aren’t as kind or gentle as this young lady standing in front of you. You don’t have to worry, I will continue in my fight against evil, but please understand, even a hero needs a home and I found mine in her arms.” You casted your eyes down on the ground as you felt them overflowing with wetness. His tender words filled your soul with warmth and made you wonder for thousandth time just today how did you deserved a man like him. He often joked around but never when it came to serious matters, relationship definitely being one. He was honest, confessing his love for you to the whole world. “Shall we go, honey?” He asked you, voice soft, turning you slowly to face him. You smiled brightly at your new nickname. “Yeah,” you whispered breathily and before you knew it, he carried you bridal style while you soared through the air. You let out a weak squeak, tears flying around as the wind rushed against your face.  Soon you landed on a roof of high building near the city center. “I’m sorry they cornered us in the end,” he apologized, setting you down. “It’s alright,” you gave him a reassuring smile. Your knees were still shaky from your touched state. “Thank you… for what you said back then,” you avoided his intense gaze, roses blooming on your cheeks. You wished your thoughts were more coherent so you could actually respond with a confession of your own, but as luck would have it, you were speechless blushing mess. “[y/n], I meant every word I said and you better be ready to hear more,” he took your hands into his, rubbing little circles over your knuckles. “And now that our relationship is official, you can’t run that easily from me,” he smirked playfully, invading your personal space. “As if I wanted to run, you dummy,” you jumped at him in excitement when the full weight of his words finally hit you. Yet you were still in denial over your luck. He caught you chuckling with his deep voice and leaned in to rest his forehead against yours. His proximity made the color in your cheeks more prominent. You stared into his fierce blue eyes and cherished the sudden tranquillity, a fond smile on your lips. “All Might, I think I’m utterly in love with you,” your teeth showed as your lips spread widely in a grin. His expression mimicked your and he shook his head in silent laughter. “You dork,” he closed the distance between you, kissing you deeply but gently. His lips were delightfully moist and soft against your own. Kissing him always felt so out of this world you briefly wondered if this was what heaven was like. It was everything. Only when your lungs screamed for oxygen did you break the kiss but still lingered close, your lips still touching. “I love you too, [y/n],” he said so sweetly you almost thought that suffocating during kissing wouldn’t be such a bad way to go.

[luke-hughes43]

i love love love the hughes sister you wrote!! and now all i can think of is having to to the ducks with leo carlson (maybe he went theif to the ducks, don’t know how they would work but this is a fanfic!) and as a rookies they get really close and maybe get together?

aww thank you!!

(I also totally forgot abt your asks but I am getting to them!)

so the ducks made a trade and got the 5th pick and drafted Leo. him and hughes sister exchange numbers and talk a decent amount to get to know each other. they get fairly close during dev camp and both sign ELCs right after dev camp.

they decide to actually get a place together in Anaheim for the season to help them adjust so they aren't alone. they are on the same street as trevor, jamie, and mason so they have older teammates nearby to help them with said adjustment.

they are very close friends for a while and then after Leo gets hurt is when hughes sister starts to realize that she might have feelings.

everyone else saw their feelings for each other except them. the ducks had an underground bet going on as to when they would finally admit their feelings.

Quinn had a sneaky suspicion when he sees them constantly being in the media together in Anaheim and her always mentioning him when he calls. he can also tell during their pregame interactions.

jack and Luke are little more oblivious being all the way jersey but jack puts a few things together when trevor mentions it. Luke doesn't really care because they are both in their rookie years and he's trying to give her space to find her own footing in the league.

ellen knows before all of her kids bc she knows her daughter and just knows about everything with her kids. Jim doesn't care.

but it's not until after the all start that something gets said about the feelings. trevor has them and few of the young guys over to just hang out off the ice and they have slightly too much to drink and kiss.

the next morning, they talk about the kiss and their feelings and start dating. but they decide to keep everyone on the down low bc she's a hughes and the first woman in the nhl and doesn't wanna deal with the shit of dating teammates and stuff like that.

she has enough to deal with being a hughes that plays hockey let alone dating a teammate. somehow they manage to keep on te down low from the media all throughout their ELCs and after the both sign extensions.

but maybe hughes sister doesn't sign with the ducks and signs somewhere else?

[nikiluv]

I JUST WANNA SAY THAT I ACCIDENTALY RANTED!!😭 u dont have to post or answer to this but i had to get this off my chest. but bro ppl who in this fandom are literally so soft istg😭its so irritating like. they treat riki like he's a fucking kid when he's 18 turning 19🤦‍♀️so he's a YOUNG MAN!! A MAN A GROWN ONE BTW who just so happens to b young like what's so hard to grasp. Nbs saying you have to treat him like he done experienced every walk of life, but at the end of the day he's still a man and he should b treated accordingly. and it esp pisses me off cuz they have no issue sexualizing the other members specifically the hyung line. and ofc I see other ppl kinda fester this energy into sunoo and jungwon even tho its mainly riki. I vividly rmb someone making a tiktok AS A JOKE!! saying I wanna get aten by sunoo like that when he inhaled a cake and ppl were doing entirely TOO MUCHHH!! and she rightfully called them out saying if it was heeseung or jake nb would care and ppl would agree and its like literallyyy. I've also seen ppl on here say they won't wrote smut for sunoo and riki and its like there's nothing wrong with that at all but why are we leaving out jungwon like hello?? hes very much still apart of that line and sunoo is older than both of them so its like?? if u leave one out leave them all out😭🤦‍♀️i could name so much more examples but this is alr getting so long. but I also had to mention the fact that I VIVIDLY rmb when jungwon turned 18 or 19 or wtv age ppl immediately started pumping out smuts with absolutely no fuss and its like?? WHERE WAS THIS ENERGY AT W NIKI???At least keep the same energy if u do ts like. And its just so much that plays into it too because everyone knows enhypen is catered towards women. I feel like that was their first mistake but on top of that it brought in a lot of young girls who's minds clearly still aren't developed and they feel as tho its like their job?? to protect them when in reality half of the group could literally be their uncle or something. Idk its just so irritating to see ts within a fandom because although I don't claim any kpop fandom anymore. I use to b a engene at some point and a nctzen at some point and LEMME TELL YOUUUU its such a difference!! although ncity has had its moments that was like the only kpop fandom who were actually funny and wouldn't baby none of the members. even if u were underage they would still treat u accordingly without sexualizing u. idk ima stop here cuz this is getting to long but its just so much shit wrong w engenes. like I said earlier u don't have to read or answer to this!! but engenes just annoy the heck outta me🤦‍♀️

it’s fine, what you say was facts tho, like I was an nctzen arnd 2020-2022 ish, and like no nctzen smut blogs said anything about jisung smut being wrote, I mean there where that didn’t agree with it but no hate comments or anything

To me it’s so insane about how people write so much crazy shit about jw but don’t keep the same energy w sunoo and riki

For sunoo it’s probably because he is portrayed at “more feminine” which is just his image, and also because of his sunsun ship etc etc

To me it’s if you wanna give the same energy to Niki, keep that energy towards ALL of Enhypen, don’t just “defend” Niki, talking about writing smut for him just to make yourself better

And the craziest thing is those that are super pressed are always the Enhypen smut blogs ? Like bro ??? Ur writing smut too, what are you on about?? (If it’s fluff blogs then I understand because they do not want to see them, which is valid, so just block, it’s fine, you don’t have to see things you do not want to, no need to send hate )

I really detest that people wanna write the craziest most lewd shit for the rest of Enhypen but when someone writes something for riki even slightly suggestive or fluff smut , they go berserk? Like dude, u go on and on about how we should not sexualise them, then don’t write smut ? Bffr 🤣

[aliettali]

I wanna know more about your clone ocs!

thank you so much for asking this you have opened the floodgates i am so sorry! 

i have nine: tidbit, crypt, oops, flipside, sher, intel, three-two, pint, and dangle. i’ve only (officially) drawn crypt and tidbit so far, but i do have a sketch for oops that i’ll be putting in here as reference. it is also worth mentioning that only crypt and tidbit are actually alive - the others all died so they dont have as much lore!

everyone except tidbit (crypt + co) are batchmates. the large majority of them die before they can individualize so they don’t have many unique designs my bad! also they’re all relatively young- i’d like to think that they’re fresh out of kamino and get assigned to the 501st on umbara almost immediately. and that goes SPLENDID (all of them die except for crypt, who is left to deal with losing every single one of his batchmates within a single campaign)

putting things under a "keep reading" section because it gets pretty long

crypt ct-4342:

well he WAS going to be a medic and them umbara fucked him up so severely (physically and mentally) that he couldnt deal w the hypothetical consequences of having blood on his hands anymore

now hes a slicer (he goes back to get medic certified because he does want to save people but that’s a separate character arc) 

honestly i signed him up for bad things happen bingo and he just has to deal with it

doesnt get a name until after umbara, chose it because a) encryption, slicing reference b) crypt -> grave -> his brothers never got one

facial/corneal scarring that holds his right eye slightly open+ some hearing loss that he makes up for with (unsanctioned) modifications to his bucket. outer arm scarring too because he shielded his head

tidbit ct-2719:

field medic ! hes also a little bitch but a) older and b) aware of concepts such as “emotional maturity” and “compartmentalization” so he’s doing ok 

he and crypt hit it off pretty quickly because it took him exactly three whole days of being stationed w the 501st to sprain an ankle by doing a cartwheel on a sloped floor (dangle dared him to)... but he was polite and nice and compliant in the medbay which is rare

theyre the most brother figures to ever i love them dearly

anyway tidbit keeps his hair short because he got fed up w it getting in his face when leaning over people you know how it is. never plans on getting a tattoo because he’s seen too many people in the medbay with ink related infections for that to happen, settles for hair bs instead

got his name because he tells his patients random bullshit to distract them

mostly closed off bc he’s seen a lot of troopers die (he cares far too much and it’s becoming a problem) and if he can’t save them in time then it means he’s losing those he loves because of his own incompetence

oops ct-4748 (dies on umbara): 

this motherfucker decided to catch an activated thermal detonator and tossed it back so late that he burnt his eyebrows off permanently (he also has burns on his hand but they wear gloves)

the only thing he said was “oops” so that’s his brand now

overall he was a pretty chill guy too bad he died saving crypt 

(he dies draped on top of crypt, who wakes up half thinking that they’re back on kamino in a batch pile but nope! oops is dead sher is dead pint is dead three-two is dead he can only pray that dangle and intel are alright) (crypt gets up and casts oops off and has to leave him behind, stumbling through a veritable graveyard, almost blind in one eye and teary-eyed in the other, and almost gets shot when he finally finds more troopers) (they’re the 212th but its okay they're alive and okay) (he gets through the disguise clusterfuck and crypt races over to tidbit to ask about dangle and intel) (they’re dead and gone and he has never been so alone)

flipside ct-4344 (dies on umbara):

little bitch, got his name because he really hated the kamino bunk pillows and kept flipping them over to get at the cooler side (he just ran really hot for no reason)

dies in a classic krell “push forward no matter the consequences” maneuver- he's the first of the batch to die actually good for him

was probably the closest to straight up defecting out of everyone

sher ct-4190 (dies on umbara):

the calm normal guy, he and intel are probably the reasons the batch got off kamino in the first place

slightly longer hair than regulation - he wanted to grow it out into a ponytail but guess what happened

was an older brother out of necessity but the others realized how hard he was taking it whenever any of them did something reckless and got hurt as a result so they toned it down a bit

forces crypt to go on without him when he gets shot and subsequently dies alone

he was going to be a sniper bc he always had steady hands (his batchmates always asked him to cut their hair for them) (he was trembling when he died) (i think he was too kind to survive much longer than that anyway)

intel ct-4223 (dies on umbara):

REALLY focused on making plans, the second most responsible

“guys, please, what’s the plan? we have intel for this test, we just watched the other group take it-”

“you and your intel. i say our plan is to FUCK IT and BALL” 

he and sher try really hard to manage the others. sadly kamino does not manufacture child leashes

gets killed on umbara like a good soldier who follows orders (krell tactics again)

he dies painfully aware of his own insignificance bc preciously he was driven by some hope that hey!!! if we get past this training/test/battle we won’t be forgotten but exactly three people end up remembering him as a person lmao (tidbit, crypt, rex)

i think he and dogma fucking hated each other

pint ct-4337 (dies on umbara):

the only one of them to have paint on their armor pre-umbara and thats through sheer bad luck - he walked into a room and kicked over a can of paint and got some of it on his boot toe

dies alongside intel

three-two ct-4332 (dies on umbara):

never chose a name, pretty withdrawn from the rest of his batch bc he, unfortunately, is hyperaware of his circumstances and what will happen to his brothers after the war

aggressively regulation haircut

as soon as intel and pint are killed in front of him he realizes that they might not matter in the long run but his brothers wormed their ways into his heart and now they're gone before he even chose a name. he didnt even get to tell them his name and they're dead (messes up and gets shot moments later)

dangle ct-4322 (dies on umbara):

suspiciously flexible, probably hypermobile, loved dangling (!) from the top bunk with his legs on the bed and his entire upper body just. hanging there

saw shaak ti do a sick jedi trick ONCE and decided that was his brand so he liked practicing cartwheels and splits and backbends in his spare time

they didnt have music (cant have shit on kamino) so he hummed his own and imagined dances to them

dies on umbara ft the clone eating plant thing because he was under the impression that crypt was just killed

[blueiight]

back to wiaw…keeping them home fires burning readthru.

hilde’s graduation<333 i feel like a proud dad omg she was just 7 years old yesterday😢😢😢

Martin and Kircheis, neither of whom had any estates to speak of, remained silent, Kircheis with his placid smile, and Martin looking uncomfortably at Hilde. miss martin shaking up the table.. yang’s current situation im still reeling from how sotp ended. was not in the right frame of mind to fully process & still wont be until hes in the mix once more. hilde saying ‘HANK’ is Good with a capital G. like. u dont even know his name pop!.. hilde would be the perfect lawyer fuck this stone age empire. poor kircheis out of his body here 🤣🤣😢

good friends winkwink. yang noooo😢😢u not leeching off the mariendorfs they love u theyre literally the only good family on this side of the galaxy.

“I think we have more respectability put together than either of us have apart.” hes willing to rep reuenthal at grandpa’s funeral AND be maggie’s mutual beard.. one lazy man, roped into so much shit. its funny cuz in sotp it was maggie who was the high life baroness ‘marrying down’ but now with her 'fall' from grace itll be viewed as yang dragging her ‘back up’ into respectable society .. oh how the wheel keeps turning. or wdf this work is titled

Yang nodded solemnly. “The thing about mothers, young sir, is that everyone has one, whether she’s around or not.” stunning wisdom from our friend ‘HANK’

wiaw fred actually seems more like a haggard worn down slightly paranoid emperor than his enigmatic show counterpart. liking it. sad for yang, but dont worry my dear ‘HANK’ , at least one old man loves you (franz giving him the ring was so heartfelt). and having the emperor now dislike u should be an homage to ur waning proletarian spirit anyways

THE DREAM… ohmygod. something about how dreams neurologically work in that the mind goes into strange places but also knowing this is a fictional narrative so this means a lot. the cars running backwards. please visit my father, yang entering the door alone. wow. yeah. family. marriage. possible political problems. somethings going on here.

SIT flashbacks oh when it was all so much easier😢😢😢even if he was being a CUNT there

poppa r.. when is he ever not drunk. wait. grandpa being only 12 years older than the father.. that man said oskar’s mingling with the foreigners and the queers bc hes barely a noble (aka a ‘ bastard ‘ ) oh this family trifling & dubious AF. i love that his whole family situation is so enigmatic & haunts the narrative bc thats how it rly be in these fucked up family situations.

“He looks just like his mother, you know.” When Yang said nothing in response, Reuenthal’s father continued. “She was proud, too. I wanted her to ask me for forgiveness, but she never did, and then she killed herself rather than apologize.”

“What, exactly, were you waiting for her to apologize for?” Yang hated him.

“You know what.”

It was a testament to the brilliance of Reuenthal’s pride, that he would never apologize for existing, despite how much his father wanted him to. Yang loved him for it.

“I hope you realize someday, Herr von Reuenthal, that your wife and son never apologized to you because they had nothing to apologize for.”

“You don’t know anything,” Reuenthal’s father hissed, and Yang remembered, vividly, the same tone, the same voice, spitting at him from across the booth at Joseph’s bar, a lifetime ago. It was the same unbridled malice, when a Reuenthal was confronted with this truth, the one that they didn’t want to face because facing it would hurt too much. Only this time, it wasn’t Reuenthal-Yang’s-friend— it wasn’t Oskar— it was this living ghost.

“I know Oskar,” Yang said. “And that’s enough.”

Everything about this passage is so…my chest hurts. wiaw yang is so so sweet and loving of wiaw reuenthal in a way thats believable. its like how hes always in the mix of some bullshit in the gaidens+ canonverse wise and he doesnt wanna be there but hes there for his own interest in the topic and/or love for the person involved. and omg For Pride!!!! lotgh ep93 namedrop. it is all In the Name Of pride. but that pride is fundamentally rooted in spite which is a trainwreck we all just waiting for it to happen. this is relatable. the ova canon physical resemblance to his mother, the wiaw canon dispositional resemblance to his father in his (vilest) moments… amazing.

CH2 MITTREUEMITT on ISERLOHN together. i never mentioned it b4 but their flagships being named after 2 halves of the same city omg this is even more egregious than canonverse Brunhilde & Tristan somehow. its giving what needs to be gave

Reuenthal tapped his chin. “Stuck is an interesting word for it.”

Mittermeyer raised an eyebrow. “Dangerous talk.”

everytime someone in wiaw says 'dangerous' talk i smile like a hideous creature. wait. wait. theyre at iserlohn. and yang’s promise to braunschweig involved iserlohn. ohmygod and they dont even know💔💔

Seeing Reuenthal regularly did something indescribable and potent to his mind, made him feel like a student again, with all thoughts of home distant and unpleasantly vague, and Reuenthal right there, so physical in front of him.

u make me feel like i am young again… omg💔💔💔💔💔

Reuenthal’s hand tangled in Mittermeyer’s hair, almost pulling on it, and Mittermeyer nipped at Reuenthal’s lips in exchange, causing him to make a soft, needy noise, his other hand digging into Mittermeyer’s uniform.

Mittermeyer pulled him back towards the bedroom, and Reuenthal easily followed. They didn’t bother turning on the light, but light spilled in from the living room, plenty to see by, and Mittermeyer gave one glance at his bedside table, confirming that he had remembered to put away in the bottom drawer the photograph of Eva that usually had a place of honor there. It was as much for his sake as it was for Reuenthal’s.

. the mittreuemitt dynamic i sold my soul for at the cost of everything else (the actual rammifications. da rammys, brah.) id pay 6 billion dollars & comm all the rly lovey dovey scenes as RARE AS THEY ARE it just makes it better when we get it (& hurt more laterz.) im still at the reuenthal knight of kapche-lanka scene. but honestly mittermeyer knowing its some fuckshit impending when reuenthal’s voice is ‘light’ ohmygod i love it pillowtalking reassignments+ their ever present disdain for obes … n the association of home with heterosexual love and guilt! ohmygod..

i am amazed. im not a multi shipper like that bc i feel multi ships tend to have a preferred chara + snub others at best i prefer discrete pairings (having multiple ships but theyre discrete relationships at different stages of a character’s lives) but the writing of these relationships moves me.. like i believe they all love eachother in their own ways and thats what makes it hurt even more.

“You want to drive?” she asked.

“No,” he said. “I want to kiss you.”

mitt is the only one of the 479 mafia who learned how to spit game so thats why he has two— not even gone say it.

does wolfgang mittermeyer eat pussy, thread locked after firey debate

YANG😢😢😢that old heffa been workin him to death smh. and omg he rly cant drive.. my boy is useless below da neck frl

“If I was being mistreated at work, wouldn’t you want to know? Even if there was nothing you could do about it but worry?” she asked, cutting to the core of the problem with her hands tight on the wheel. “I love you, Wolf, and I don’t want to be lied to to spare my feelings.”

BABY GRL UON EVEN WANNA KNO THE SHIT YO MAN BEEN UP TO… ohmygod.

Dinner was a pleasant and cheerful affair, but Yang kept yawning, and the dark circles under his eyes made him look almost pitiful, so Mittermeyer’s mother had tucked him up in the guest bedroom immediately after dinner. omg hes so adorable i feel bad for him too FUCK BRAUNSCHWEIG

“Some of them.” He paused, then added, “More of them bring their mistresses.” and you get to work with yours!

The convo w his mom is scaring me .. after sotp we are getting into totally original content not to say nat hasnt been incredibly creative but ygwim here my knowledge of lotgh canon will not carry me thru these next parts like they did b4 and ik canon mitt was the immortal gale wolf but that convo gave so many death flags oh my lawd

DID EVA MISCARRY DURING THE STRESS OF THE FLEGEL SHIT OHMYGOD? My heart legit hurts 😢😢😢😢💔💔💔 WHY IS THIS SO SAD FOR ME???

“I know.” Mittermeyer looked away. “What did they think you were going to do?”

“Oh, I think they thought that you and I had something going on.”

they may have been wrong at the time but ngl i need there to be sum that go down between the two of yall. i have never begged for poly like this before in my 95 years of existence. reuyang still need they top, gurl LIKE u know his real name😢 u mess w the same girl its meant to be.

“No,” Yang said. “A friend of mine— Boris Konev— he made it up as a joke. It just sounds almost like ‘Yang Wen-li’ when you say it fast.” He shook his head. “That was a million years ago, now.”

I FUCKING KNEW IT KONEV UR SUCH A TROLL⚰️⚰️⚰️ Ugh yang hits different bc hes such an honest sort of sentiment i cant describe it hes not just kind hes truly genial& theres just this sense of weariness in wiaw so early here that he doesnt exhibit until the near end of his life in lotgh canon and it makes me so sad.

Yang shook his head. “I have no idea.” The melancholy in his voice was almost painful for Mittermeyer to listen to. He crouched down next to Yang, and handed him back the box with the engagement ring. Yang turned it over in his hands. “I have no idea what he’d think of me now.”

“You don’t think he’d be proud of you?”

Yang rubbed the back of his head. “I don’t even think he’d recognize me.”😢😢😢😢😢😢

chapter 3’s title. Oskar von Reuenthal Was Born Innocent. We gettin into it Na Chile

THAT OLD BITCH DIED WE SMOKING ON THAT PETER PACK…

The thing that made him clench his hands into white knuckled fists was the second part of the message, which said that Reuenthal had inherited everything that there was to inherit.

He didn’t want it. Not the money that was listed there in the message, not the investments that his father had made, not the house, not the land it sat on. He didn’t want any of it, and he had thought— by virtue of his father striking him from the family record almost a decade ago— that he would be free of it. He hadn’t given much thought to what would become of the property if his father failed to assign an heir (though the mental image of it crumbling into dust sometimes flashed through his head, when he remembered it,) and he had taken as much pride as he could in making his way in the world without any hope of an inheritance to fall back on.

As with every other thing his parents had given to him, it was his burden to bear, and he would bear it.

This is so powerful. and evocative. this is also the worst time for him to receive the sort of news about yang& maggie. this is perfect.

He didn’t even know if that was what he truly wanted— he knew he shouldn’t want it— but there was this sensation of pressure behind his eyes, an impulse that said the only way to free himself was to crash into something with great force, full body: a train, his face into a wall, a fist. It didn’t matter what. His body hungered for the pressure, a release valve for whatever thought he couldn’t put a name to.

like… i dont even have words i just love this. he drank instead. but he drank.

im fighting the urge to post every single paragraph of reuenthal in his father’s mansion. but im gnawing at it. just know. and in this. i remember reuenthal is the only living person who calls yang by his first name. and only in select moments. im...

“Come to my place.”

“No.”

“I’d like to see you,” Yang said.

Reuenthal took a long moment to weigh Yang’s tone. If he was offering out of pity, Reuenthal had no interest in seeing him. But if it was a genuine want on Yang’s part…

“Come here, then,” Reuenthal finally said.

“Okay,” Yang said. “I will.”

im horrified at seeing my pathology reflected here but poor yang can barely drive! and mind u its snowing ! ohmygod. OH wait we getting good fucking use of that tag i knew of it from em’s beautiful drawing but the Context makes it so much more meaty.

But Reuenthal didn’t need to keep his mother’s dresses as a reminder of anything. He had better ones. WAIT WHAT. AND WE WILL NEVER GET TO KNOW CUZ YANG IS HERE. AND.

He looked at Yang for a long moment more, the dream frozen. But then Yang stepped forward into the room, crossing the threshold, and the dream fell away, and it was just them once again, Yang coming towards him as he sat on his childhood bed. THE DREAM IS ACTUALLY SHARED AND ITS REUENTHAL’S NIGHTMARE?. WHAT IS IT WITH THESE FUCKING DOORS.

A housewarming party. im sure thisll go well/sarcasm

“Okay, then invite Evangeline too.”

“She won’t come anywhere near me unless Baroness Westpfale is also in attendance.” WHY U SO MEAN TO HER . I KNOW WHY. AND I WILL KILL U WITH ROCKS

Personally, Reuenthal didn’t feel like there was that much tension— Magdalena seemed perfectly willing to give better than she got— but Yang had been tugging at his hair watching their back and forth.

Tears ran down my face from how much i laughed at this. stop ittt ur hurting her (yang seeing two ppl he cares about go blow for blow). this is why i love wiaw cuz ppl love to force cringe ~sappho~ ~mulm~ soldiarity bullshit but maggie being brash and reuenthal being a sexist is so essential. im sure theyll get along even worse (/positively said. i love terrible things.) when he gets the tea abt maggie n yang </3. how can i speedrun to the elfriede reuenthal floor shit that i heard about

blue flowers in a gold and black beer mug. like . get it the fuck together girl.

MITTERMEYER. I SEE WHY THEY CALL YO ASS THE GALE WOLF. CUZ U MOVE FAST. this is the mittermeyer i love. i love how yang is so easy w/ reuenthal like easy kisses fade to black scenes do u want me to come by? in the snow? & i cant drive? while mittermeyer just jumps him hands on his hips while his ole lady upstairs. teeth clacking in the kiss. insane. insane. the 479 trio gets down hanny

reuenthal @ eva

“Oh, I don’t think that Hank has either the ability or the desire to dictate what I do.”

“Then you would make a poor wife,” Reuenthal said flatly. “And I would not wish you on him.”

There was a moment of awkward silence around the table, then Magdalena laughed, very loudly. “Oh, gods, Oskar, you are hilarious. I hope you come to our wedding and stand up and loudly object when they ask if anyone has a problem with us.”

THE WAY MAGGIE IS THE ONE WHO LAUNCHES THE WEDDING ANNOUNCEMENT IN SUUUUUCH A WAY. OMG.

this is the one of the only fanfic to ever exist. “Being married to Mittermeyer might be nice.” like. im cackling. this is one of the worst days in his life

OH. OH AND NOW. WE ALMOST SUCKIN DICK IN WINECELLARS NOW. WOW.

“I’ll let you know.” He would not let her know.

If Magdalena wanted the tour, he would give her the tour.

FUNNIEST thing ever. the trauma congaline is even funnier. ohmygod. pop dont ever get help💜💯DID YOU WANT ANY LEFTOVERS. THERES PLENTY OF CAKE. IM IN TEARS. hes so demented

Yang muttered. He finished his drink in what looked like one gulp, then leaned further on Reuenthal until his head settled, catlike, in Reuenthal’s lap. “I still do feel bad, though.” Yang’s eyes were closed, and Reuenthal stroked his hair. Magdalena watched, sipping her own drink, and Reuenthal silently dared her to say anything.

theyre so cute ohmygod. yang is so cute.. little kitty . im going to cut my fingers off and eat them. this is my most disorganized wiaw read (as if any of this shit was ever put together) im so gone rn. magdalena faking like shed throw the glass.

“I want to try this on,” she said, holding up Yang’s uniform, which he hadn’t noticed her carrying out of the bedroom in the dark.

ANOTHER USE OF THAT ILLUSTRIOUS TAG OMG she literally says in gaiden she would love to wear a uniform. oh my god this story is perfect

“Come on,” Magdalena said. “Call me sir. Just once.”

“Yes, sir,” Reuenthal said. It alarmed him how easy it was to indulge her.

Guys is this.

is this what.

“I don’t think this even belongs to him. I think you’re trying to trick me, for some joke.” He pulled the ring off his finger. He held it up to the light, then moved to toss it into the fire. She let out a yelp of surprise and grabbed his hand before he could let go of it, gripping tight with wide eyes and fingernails that dug into his skin. It was the first genuine reaction he thought he had ever gotten out of her, and he was smugly satisfied by it.

U wont be able to come back down 3-1 …

This simulacrum was close enough to be disturbing and fascinating, in a way that he couldn’t refuse outright.

OH WE SHOLL IS GOING THERE OHMYGOD. maggie wearing hank’s clothes in this simulacrum. her desire to take on these roles. ‘Hank’. he never got a chance to kiss ‘Hank’. theres this thing u did here w how reuenthal randomly has these moments of being in his head in the ova& getting caught up in his own illusions / head (“but im not a poet im just a vulgar warrior!” girl u was just waxing poetics about history wanting its blood n spacing out at the commander’s chair thinking about the police taking pics of ur mom’s death.) at times that. in wiaw its handled in such a tantalizing way is just. so so. wow. some ppl may find it tangential or slightly ooc but ur working magic out of scraps here n ppl dont see it. ppl dont see it. and it hurts my soul

And the morning after. i feel like something was fucked here thatll never go back the same. this and sotp is like. a complete fuckening. if thats even a word mane. omg. i done died

[elvenbeard]

I’m not very consistent with sharing these here as well, but oh well! Writing Update time!!

Last week was very productive (of course only when Nanowrimo was over already) and I wrote 11,662 words to add to my draft. I surpassed “The Hobbit” in length now, but I actually don’t think (and don’t hope) I’ll reach “The Fellowship of the Ring”. I’m more certain than ever that it’s the best idea to split this story into several books, and slowly but surely I’ll move away from calling this first one “The King of Ivendarea”. It was its title for so long and it’s going to be hard to adjust, but it was also just a working title all this time. 

Over on my Patreon I’m sharing snippets of what I’ve written each week, so if you wanna support my writing and art and other creative projects, consider supporting me there!

As a little treat, a small exchange between two of my favourite characters below the cut:

"What on earth was that?" Ricnan asked after a brief moment of silence, but tried to keep his voice low as he slowly turned to Elornan.

Elornan took a bite from his bread and smiled at him slyly.

"When I got home yesterday I saw her standing by the mailbox, even more red in her face than now," he said, "I didn't say anything, she didn't mention it. But, oh well..."

"I... still don't quite understand I think. It's too early in the morning," Ricnan sighed.

Elornan laughed.

"Well, let's say it like this," he said, leaning in a little closer to Ricnan and lowering his voice ever so slightly, "Maybe she's not hungry because her stomach is too full of butterflies already."

That woke Ricnan up properly. He looked at the door, to where they could hear Neryssa rummaging in her bag in the next room over. Then he turned back to Elornan.

"You really think so? I mean... she never mentioned anyone special, she doesn't seem too fond of the majority of her classmates even..."

"I'm fairly sure," Elornan said, taking another bun, "You know, I had someone else sitting at my table here quite some time ago, similarly bad at hiding his thoughts and feelings. It's funny, you and Neryssa are not even related, but still alike in a lot of ways."

Now it was Ricnan's cheeks to flush pink.

"'Quite some time ago', I beg your pardon..." he mumbled with played offence.

"Aaages," Elornan continued to tease, "Actual Centuries... but time very well spent I'd say. Wouldn't have wanted to spend it with someone else, either."

Ricnan chuckled as he cut open another warm, soft piece of bread. In the hallway Neryssa scurried past the kitchen door yelling a quick "Bye!" with one foot out the front door already before slamming it shut.

Both Elornan and Ricnan couldn't help but laugh out loud now.

"Oh, to be young again, indeed," Ricnan mused but Elornan shrugged.

"Sure, some things are easier when you're young, but admittedly, most aren't," he said, "Not for me at least."

"So you don't mind me turning officially old tomorrow?"

"'Officially old'," Elornan snickered, "I'm still older than you."

"On paper, in numbers, yes," Ricnan said, somewhat more sober now, "But physically, one day I'm gonna catch up and surpass you."

"That is still far in the future," Elornan said, putting a hand on his arm, "and I prefer living in the here and now, not worrying about what might or might not happen someday."

"I like the sound of that," Ricnan smiled.

[tiltingheartand]

"so a professor and a sniper walk into a gay bar in florida"

I need to know.

ahahaha. so, actually, counting the dreamling fic i posted in november (which came third) and the jack/daniel fic i posted yesterday, at one point i had three separate “so these two people bump into each other in a gay bar” WIPs. the jack/daniel one came first; this one came second, so the name was mostly me making a joke at my own expense.

this one is for numb3rs, and i have no idea if you’ve ever watched that! the professor in question is charlie eppes, the main character, and the sniper in question is ian edgerton, the fourth-best sniper in … the country? i wanna say the country. (another character, at one point, calls him “one of the best snipers in the known universe”.) the show takes place in LA and LA-adjacent areas, which is why the florida part is relevant.

i find the dynamic between charlie and ian fascinating. the first time they meet there’s so much friction, but as the series progresses you can visibly see them thawing toward each other. when ian is trying to clear his name in “ultimatum” one of his initial demands is charlie, on a video call, in 20 minutes; when charlie gets there, ian apologizes for getting him involved, and you can see he genuinely means it. and in the last episode, ian’s “i cannot believe your brother didn’t invite me to his wedding!” is something he never would’ve said after their first meeting. neither of them probably would’ve believed they’d get to that point, after their first meeting.

this also stems from my general dissatisfaction with the charlie/amita relationship — don’t get me wrong, i absolutely loved amita as a character, but the will-they-won’t-they got so, so, so old. and even after they finally settled down together it … i don’t know. sometimes when i’m watching a tv show two characters will get together and my thought is “awwww, finally!” or something like that, and sometimes two characters will get together and it feels like they’re only getting together because the writers thought it was a good idea. which, like … i realize the inherent nonsense of that statement, don’t worry, but i can’t think of a better way to put it. it felt very forced, to me.

so that’s where this picks up: a year or so after the season finale, charlie in florida because he’s been at loose ends for a few months since the visiting professorship and his marriage both ended and he figured, hey, why not? and ian in florida because his last assignment was in florida and his bosses have been Strongly Hinting that maybe he should take some of his vacation days, perhaps, please.

also, here, a snippet:

“Well well well,” he hears, a second and a half later, and turns his head despite himself, because that sounded an awful lot like Ian Edgerton, which is ridiculous. Except when he looks, Ian just raises his eyebrows a little, looking like he’s trying very hard not to smirk. 

“Ian,” he says. “Hi.” 

“Professor,” Ian replies, nodding slightly, letting a bit more of the smirk out. “What’s a nice young man like you doing in a place like this?”

“Well,” Charlie says, “I’m guessing you’re looking for a more detailed answer than drinking, even though it would be accurate?” He holds up his half-empty glass as proof.

“Good guess, although you don’t actually have to answer,” Ian says. Then, after a pause, “Also, what is that you’re drinking?”

Um. “Hmm,” he says out loud, looking down into the glass thoughtfully. No drink name written on the underside of the glass; that would be too easy. Also too complicated, probably, in the long run. “I don’t remember what it’s called, actually, but it tastes like pineapple and coconut and blue.” 

“Blue is a flavor?”

“Absolutely.” Probably.

(ask me about any of my WIPs, if you would like!)

[wench-and-jezebel]

Dark Angel Reaction: C.R.E.A.M.

Jezebel (@typicalopposite) reacts [with occasional asides by Wench (@scripted-downfall)]

Brief aside for yet another stunning introductory conversation:

Jezebel: How many episodes are in season one? Wench: kjdsflkajs Like, 21 Jezebel: Season two? Wench: Also 21 Jezebel: And how many is Ackles in? Wench: Um… 21 - 3 + 1, so 19.  Ish. Jezebel: OK that’s good Wench: ??? Jezebel: I was like am I really gonna have to deal with this version of Max for that long and not even get my fill of Ackles Wench: askdjflkajdflkjadf The first Ackles ep is episode 17 of s1; you'll have a fix soon.  Jezebel: Yeah but he dies that’s… That’s like getting a fix but it’s laced with something that cancels the fix  before you really enjoyed it Wench: ... I'm adding this conversation to the post

There ya go; an insight into our bonkers mental states at the start of this episode

– – –

[Okay, I’m sorry, but this is the third of three non-pilot titles in a row that is an innuendo in one way or the other; was this intentional or did they just get reallyyyyy unlucky?  Or.  I guess.  Really lucky.  You never know.]

It’s the guy from water boy.  Not really but how he talked

Logan so mysterious

She looks like Ziva (Tony’s love interest in NCIS)

"Your.  Father.  WAS.  Disappeared." ??? Say it weirder why don't you

“So depressing”  Bitch

Oh find something that made it up your alley huh

ITS A TRAP!!! THATS PENNYWISE!!  RUNNNNN KIDS  [He comes up later, actually.]  TIM CURRY?  [No, Pennywise]  Lame  [LKA;LDSKFKL]  Tim Curry’s awesome 😂

Lintlicker the dancing clown

This opening end kills me. The fetus doing cartwheels in her eye is just… wot [alksjdflkajdsflkasjd I KNOW.  But it gets worse in s2]  Like it would have been edgier to have the young version

I LOVE HIS ACCENTTTTTT  [I wanna say his name is Herbal, btw]  Like the tea! Makes sense his voice is calming!

*sigh* how cliche

That Nintendo?  THATS NINTENDO!

Them and the damn bike tricks

I love her.  OC I mean.  (Then again the other her is Max so that should have been easy to understand)

Ewwww the trash water

Is that money?

Does NO ONE look up in this show?  Ever?  LIKE. she wasn’t even inconspicuous!  [NO THEY NEVER DO]

Matilda.  The scene where she’s under the table hiding

“What if I wanna hold it over here”  ☠️☠️ [Oh, look, she’s showing off again.]  Wot.  Ma’am's little speeches hurt my brain

☠️☠️☠️☠️"It looked like a girl"

SHIT I NEED TO DO THE ASK ABOUT NORMAL!  SORRY ANON!!!  I’LL DO IT SOON  (But at least I will have a little more to go off)

I thought he said the dad was hitting the bong and had a boyfriend

Iss me, oh my

[Not Logan offering her a way to seem slightly less blatantly transgenic/conspicuous by carrying a gun and her saying “Nah I wanna show off my asskicking powers instead.”]  ☠️☠️☠️☠️ Women! Lol

– – –

Midpoint (Kinda) Judgement (aka: this practice came about because we keep having to pause in the middle, and this time it was slightly before halfway through, but it counts enough ig): Ok, so this one doesn’t feel as Max heavy. But alas she’s still there and still got her new and improved (hah) attitude. Although it’s not as strong as last ep. BUT again this doesn’t seem as Max centric as the other three, so maybe that will change second half.  [Are you talking about the way there's a second plot with Sketch, OC, Herbal, et al?]  Yeah and then Logan looking for the girls father. Just seems everyone else has been on screen more and she pops in says something with attitude thens like gotta blaze gotta jet gotta fly. Gotta do whatever.  [That's gonna be pretty off-and-on common.  s2, for example, usually has two plotlines; Max-centric and other-centric.  A lot of the time, that's Alec's plotline, but sometimes it's Joshua or Sketchy or one of the others.  It's nice in some ways, iffy in others, but yeah]  Ahhhh! I see! Not complaining :) lol

– – –

Oh that was money!

bitch slappppeddd

I get those too I get it (ulcers).  (I don’t really.  Well, I might.  Idk)

Oh man

Looooool “bounce”.  That ones new

Poor Sketch (sarcasm cause he is kinda sleezy)  [You mean... sketchy? :)  But he gets a bit better]

How does he make those damn glasses look good.

I love her hairrrrrrr.  If she’s gonna be a bitch, why did she have to change the hair??? Gimme something Alba!  *sigh*

Le gasp!  Isn’t he the dead guy

He is!!!  Plot twissstttt

Ahh love.  It be doing thing to ya

Man you can’t see her

Don’t you know that’s how you get dead?  Has he not watched tv?

If she.  If.  She.  If she says one more thing that seems like a slap to his wheelchair boundness.  😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨 "A girl who moves the furniture (cause you can’t)"

How did he abandon you, chick?  Y’all were estranged!  Do you know know what that means?

Girl/thought-dead father vs Max/red balloon.  Not the same

☠️  Letting that balloon go messed her up ☠️☠️  [LKJLKADSJF;LKASJDF;LKSAJDF; NOOOOOO!!!  I’m ded.  I’m.  Dead.  That’s it.  You killed me.]

😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨  Looking like one of Charlie’s angels

Bimboooossss 🙂 damn being a girl comes in handy

“Cause I’m a super human.  I told you this last episode.  Not my fault you didn’t buy it.”

☠️☠️☠️☠️ “17 black, like me.”

☠️☠️☠️ Here we play for money  (You know he didn’t want to say that)

☠️☠️☠️☠️ YOU SHOULD THROW ONE OF YOUR TENS… YOU GOT TOO MANY

[The absolute wall of skulls here.]  …..☠️☠️☠️☠️

Dramatic card-playing

[... Gonna be honest... new ship unlocked]  I knowwww  [Just saying, Max/OC would also explain the latter’s tendency to view Max as amazing regardless of context.  She screwed with Logan’s brain too.] This is very true!

I TOLD YOU I WAS A SUPER HUMAN

POWER OF THE BOOB.! That money held up that whole fight

[Poor Sketchy is such a screw-up.  I forgot how bad s1!Sketch was, because s2!Sketch is at least vaguely competent.]  😂😂😂

Welp.  Here’s where either one or both die.  Or she kills him.

Huh.  Damn.  Called it

Oh boo boo hoo.

[Logan: *Angstily exercises*]

Sad death video

[“C.R.E.A.M., baby.  C.R.E.A.M.”  WHAT DID I SAY!??!?! THAT WAS FREAKING INTENTIONAL.]  ☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️

More talking in circles  [Simultaneously: She did the "or maybe not' thing agai- askdjf;lkajdf Same brain cell :)]  *sigh*

Aight done and done!

[dragonmasterkaylz]

Detectives Luna & Rena Wilde

This is a Big Sky fanfic that takes place in Season 3, after Episode 9, before the kidnapping of Denise and Emily. Also… like I say with all of my FanFics… if you don’t like, don’t read! Luna and Rena Wilde also belong to me and, I hope you enjoy.

On the streets of Montana, two beautiful women were walking towards the Police Station. One had dyed silver hair and the other had dyed ginger hair, both with bright green eyes. The two walked in and then Jenny turned to them. “Detectives Luna and Rena Wilde?”, she asked. The two nodded and smiled. “And you must be Deputy Jenny Hoyt”, Luna said before shaking her hand, leading Rena to the same. “It’s nice to meet you”. “Yeah, you too. Now come with me”.

Beau was throwing his football up in the air and catching it when Jenny walked in with the two Detectives. “Oh! Hello Detectives!”, he said with a charming smile, causing Luna to blush slightly. “Luna and Rena Wilde. Twins. Previously stationed in L.A. Why did ya leave?” Rena smiled and said, “We just wanted to leave the big city, so when we saw job openings in Montana… we just couldn’t resist!” He smiled and said, “Well, your last boss said some great things about you two”.

The two frowned and then looked at each other before Luna said, “Really?! We thought he hated us!” Beau shook his head and said, “No, he actually liked you both. You did your jobs well, always came up with results, but what he did say was that you two were like a wolf and a fox. He also said, ‘Luna’s the brawn that will protect people and stop at nothing to find the culprit. Rena’s cunning, sly and smart. She can think like a criminal and easily figure out all possible motives’”.

Rena giggled and said, “Sounds like us~. He called us a ‘fox’ and ‘wolf’ so much that we decided to dye our hair~”. Beau chuckled and said, “Well, we have a case for the two of you already. I know, it’s your first day, but I kinda wanna see you two in action, since your boss said some amazing things about the of you. Our suspect for a murder is in the interrogation room and if you don’t mind, I’d like to observe the two you”. Luna smirked and said, “Rena will crack him. Don’t worry”.

After reading the case file, Rena put it down and then looked at Walter before observing him. “Protection dolls? Paige’s body doesn’t show up? Yeah, I don’t think you killed her or any of the other victims for that matter! So, why are you protecting the woman that clearly manipulated you?” Walter just looked down, making Luna smirk. Jenny frowned and asked, “Why do you say that?” The Detective then said, “The 15 Million Dollars, that’s why”. Beau then said, “We need more”.

“A young woman and her boyfriend go to a camping trip to get away from her possible pursuers because of the money they stole. They get separated and she’s left alone with someone who might protect her, so she uses love or possibly sex to manipulate him into doing so. She’s without the means to get the stolen goods, so she needs protection from whoever might try to take the money and that’s why she needs him. The cops show up, he turns himself in to give her a head start”.

Luna then asked, “Did you collect Paige’s property by any chance?” Beau nodded. “All of it”. “Are you sure something isn’t missing? Because there might be, you just haven’t seen it”. Jenny then ran to the evidence room and collected everything before returning very shortly. Luna put on some gloves and went through everything until she got to the book. She flipped through it and smirked. “Jackpot! Two pages have been freshly torn out. Now, who wants that money so badly?”

Beau then asked, “Are you saying that diary has something to do with the money?” Rena then said, “If I wanted to keep something secret, I’d put it in my super secret diary. But we have no one else to clarify this since the other person who could’ve know about is dead. Unless… someone other people knew about it~”. Jenny then said, “Tanya and Donno know about it”. “And possibly Avery since he went snooping in their tent”, Beau said. “Who’s more desperate?”, Luna asked.

“What?”, Jenny asked. “Who’s so desperate that they would commit a federal crime?”, Luna asked again. The Sheriff sighed and then said, “Avery. Alright, you two come with me!” The three walked out of the Station and then Luna said, “We should probably take my car. He won’t recognise it if we’re parked up”. Beau nodded and said, “Good call”. He looked at a silver car and mumbled, “That’s an L.A car for sure”. “You might wanna get in the backseat”, Luna said. “Uh… okay…?”

Once they got to the hotel, Beau got out and said, “You’re a fast driver!” Luna smiled before saying, “I don’t mess around~”. They walked in and headed straight for Avery’s room. Rena then whispered, “You two, hide at either side of the door frame”. “Okay?”, Beau said, confused by how they did things. After the two hid, Rena knocked on the door and sweetly said, “Housekeeping~!” Once the door opened, Avery frowned and said, “It isn’t that time, darling”. “Oh, I’m aware…”.

Beau and Luna then came out from hiding, both pointing guns at him. “Get in”, the silver haired girl said. He walked back with his hands in the air and she cuffed him almost immediately. Rena then put on gloves and giggled. “What do we have here~?” “Is this how you usually do things?”, Beau asked. “Yes, this is only temporary. Just so Avery doesn’t mess with the evidence”. Rena then walked up to him and said, “I found the pages, so what are these highlighted parts?”

“It’s an encryption code to the money. I need to assemble it together in order to get it. If I don’t, they’ll kidnap Carla and Emily…”, he said. Beau’s eyes widened in shock. “What?! Why the hell didn’t you tell me?!” “Because I didn’t want to scare you!”, Avery said to him. “Well that didn’t work now, did it?!” “That’s enough! Both of you! You can tear each others throats out later!!!”, Luna shouted. Rena then said, “Someone’s encrypted it~! Now, who are you working for~?” “What…?”

Luna then knelt down. “Who. Are. You. Working. For?” “I don’t know his name, but I do know his identity and where he hangs out”, Avery said. Beau then said, “Let’s take him in”. Luna dragged him up and said, “To save Beau’s family, you are gonna tell him that you have the money and tell him to meet you. Rena!” “Oh, I’m ten steps ahead!“ Avery made the made the call and when it ended he said, “The Boot Heel. At midnight”. Rena then smirked and said, “This’ll be good~”.

Once they got to the Police Station, Avery was placed in the interrogation room and Luna sat with Beau. “So, Emily’s your little girl and Carla’s your ex-wife?” “Yeah… and they’re very important to me. I don’t know why he would put them in so much danger for the sake of his own goddamn problems! Shouldn’t family come first?!”, he asked. She nodded and said, “Family always comes first and I’ll be damned if they get hurt”. Beau nodded and said, “Thanks for that, Luna”.

At midnight, the mob walked into The Boot Heel and only saw Rena standing there with a smirk on her face. “Well, who do we have here?” “Your worst nightmare~!” They all pointed guns at her and she snapped her fingers. Beau, Jenny, Cassie and Pop came out from all sides. Luna, who came out from behind them, shouted, “Move!!! Now!!!” They walked forward and Jenny shouted, “Put the guns down and put your hands in the air! Now!” They did so and Rena giggled sweetly.

“Do what my sister says now. You don’t want to make her angry~”. “Down! On your knees! All of you!”, Luna shouted. They did as she told and she cuffed them all, but when she got to the big boss, he head-butted her from behind. “Argh!” She stood up, her nose bleeding, and then shouted, “You bastard!!!” She grabbed his arms and shoved him down onto the floor before cuffing him up. “What did I say…?”, Rena asked. Beau then gave Luna a tissue for her nose. “Oh! Thank you”.

“Get them outta here!”, he shouted. Other officers walked out and then took them out of the bar. “I have to say… that was a great plan”, Jenny said. Cassie smiled and said, “You two are brilliant”. “Lure them in and catch them at their weakest~”, Rena giggled. Luna sighed and mumbled, “I’m sorry… she gets way too into her job…”. Beau nodded and asked, “Are you alright?” “Yeah, I’ve had my nose broken before. This ain’t that, so I’m fine”, she said with a sweet smile. “Good”.

After the case had been solved, Beau took everyone to the bar for a celebratory drink and he discovered pretty quickly that Luna could drink a lot. “Woah!” “Yeah… Luna is a heavy drinker”, Rena said with a shrug. “Surprisingly, she never throws up or gets a hangover with how much she does drink!” Beau chuckled and said, “I could do with a dance. Who’s with me?” Luna then said, “I’ll dance with you~”. Rena sighed and then Jenny asked, “Does she like Beau?” “Oh yes!”

“What?!” “Rena… shut up!!!”

To Be Continued…

[mindofharry]

In which dilf!harry gets insecure about his age and takes it out on his younger girlfriend Y/N.

ENJOY THE ANGST AND FEEDBACK IS WELCOME AS ALWAYS!!! HAPPY READING!!! :-)

✧ ✧ ✧

Harry loves Y/N.

With all his heart. But recently he’s been felt this unfamiliar feeling seep into his body, making unwanted visions occur every time he closed his eyes. Visions of Y/N with younger men, out on the town in clubs. His daughter finding out about their elicit relationship.

It became too much.

There were a number of reasons why he felt so unfamiliar in his relationship. A big one would be that he met Y/N through his daughter, more specifically Y/N is Blair’s best friend. That is more than enough to make you nervous. But another reason as to why Harry was feeling imposter syndrome or some sort of guilt is because of his age. He had Blair young, but ageing didn’t escape him. He’s older and it stops Y/N from doing stuff normal people would do.

For example, going out to clubs, she had stopped doing that completely. Y/N now spent her Friday nights cuddled up against Harry.

“I haven’t been clubbing in ages. I feel so old.” Y/N whined, hugging Harry from behind. Harry frowned and continued washing the dishes.

“Why would that make you feel old?” Harry teased and Y/N shrugged, leaning back against the kitchen island.

“I don’t know. I feel older than I’m supposed to be.”

That’s what struck him.

Was Harry holding her back? He was way too old to be traipsing around town getting drunk until he black out. He had his days. But that didn’t mean Y/N had to stop, she seemed to miss it and he didn’t want his age and needs to get in the way of what she wanted.

It sounded pretty logical to him at the time. If he distanced himself a little, maybe Y/N would want to go out a little more.

“Hey! It’s Y/N. Just wondering if you’d wanna watch a movie with me on Friday? I’m free all weekend too and I know Blair is away with her mom. Let me know, I miss you.”

Harry sighed and leaned back in his chair, drinking the rest of his scotch. He knew this was for the best.

Y/N was laying in bed, her phone on her stomach and her eyes a little watery. Did she say something? Do something wrong the last time they hung out? Was she too much? Too innocent? Too dirty? All of these thoughts plagued her mind as she looked through all the texts she had sent Harry.

She looked so desperate.

Y/N groaned and through her phone at the floor.

“Are you ok?” Her mom yelled, Y/N winced.

“I’m ok, momma. Just dropped something!”

Y/N bit her lip and then stood up from her bed, deciding what she’d do. She’d pay Harry a visit and see what this is all about. At the end of the day, communication is key. She needed to talk about her feelings.

Y/N also just needed her Harry.

What she imagined was they’d talk, maybe a cry a little and then they’d kiss and make up for whatever the problem was. But that is actually far from what happened.

“Y/N?” Harry asked it was more a slur of words to be honest, his eyebrows furrowed as he walked towards her.

“Are you fucking drunk?” Y/N asked.

“I’m a grown man. I can drink whenever the fuck I want.” Harry said standing in front of Y/N. Y/N sighed and nodded.

“You’re right, I’m sorry. But maybe we should go to bed. Talk about stuff when you’re sober?” Y/N asked and Harry scoffed going back to his drink and gulping the rest of it down. Y/N bit her lip and came towards Harry putting her hands up.

“I think you should slow down a little.” Y/N suggested and then shit hit the fan.

“You’re what? Twenty Three? What the fuck do you know?” Harry asked, his voice raising slightly. Y/N flinched and bit her lip to try and keep her tears at bay. She’s a sensitive person.

“You gonna cry? Like a little fucking baby.” Harry slurred getting into Y/N’s face. Y/N sniffled and looked down.

“You’re so much younger than me, like fuck. How did I get someone like you?” Harry asked, Y/N almost thought it was nice. “Someone so fucking stupid, doesn’t even do shit! Just sits around and clings to me all fucking day!” Harry slurred, seething. His face turned red with rage and Y/N whimpered.

But she didn’t let that effect her.

“I like to think you’re pretty lucky to have someone like me. Not many people like you. I can see why now.” Y/N said shortly, bringing Harry over to the couch and laying him down.

“Baby…. come lay with me.” Harry mumbled, making grabby hands like the last few minutes hadn’t happened. Y/N held in a sob and put a blanket on him.

She kissed his forehead, got him a water and an advil to take before bed and then she up and left.

And Harry had no idea what had happened when he woke up. All he was left with was a note and a banging headache.

‘Hope you’re happy, Harry. Truly. Y/N.’

🏷 TAGLIST:

@damnasstyles @michellekstyles @handsomerry @meetmymouth @harryssweatcreaturee @lidiyatakesadderall @ally5sos @hrryology @onlyangellrry @mrdarcyplease @goldensonlyangel @swiftmendeshoran @cathrry4 @xoxoloverb @milfrrynation

[kpopmakesmeweep]

badboy!yeonjun x innocent!reader 

word count: 21k

angst, fluff, smut

when your teacher asked you to tutor in the beginning of the school year, you were hesitant even then. 

you knew that it meant your lunch period and one study hall for the day were gonna be completely booked, helping younger kids grasp the basic idea that the mitochondria was the powerhouse of the cell.

but then you met one young girl desperate to pass her first test in october and knew your teacher had gotten you, sending a small, defeated smile her way as you gave her the okay to put your name on the list. 

you didn’t expect to come back from winter break with the news that the next student you’d be tutoring wasn’t a sweet 7th grade girl but none other than choi yeonjun. 

the overwhelmingly attractive but horribly intimidating boy who was a year older than you and had, quite possibly, one of the worst reputations the school has ever seen.

if he wasn’t getting suspended for fighting or smoking on school grounds, you’d attempt to block out the mindless gossip about him and all the college girls he’d frequently fraternize with. 

he was in your lunch period when you were a sophomore and he was a junior and you couldn’t help but be fascinated by how handsome he was. how he carried himself and how everyone else seemed to be fascinated by him too.

he was always wearing some variation of black, like his closet was just an empty void of black leather, dark cotton and chains. if he didn’t have on a beanie or hat, his then blue hair was a mess of waves that always made you look a few seconds too long.

you’ll never forget the day that he caught you, your nose in a textbook as you studied for a midterm before a loud shout of his name caught your attention. 

you looked up and watched one of his friends playfully punch him in the arm, something about him hooking up with the older girl he had his eye on first and yeonjun only smirking at him devilishly. 

he didn’t look apologetic or regretful in the slightest, more so like he’d do again just because he could and just because he knew the girl would be eager to have another go with him. 

your breath caught in your throat when his deep brown eyes met yours, his head cocked as he held your gaze with all the confidence and smugness you could never have. 

it took his lips quirking into a cocky smile for you to snap out of it, cheeks warming and stomach churning at getting caught before you dropped your gaze right back down to your book.

it was a quick and thorough reminder that this is where you feel comfortable and this is where you belong - with your nose in a book and your mind on your studies. 

you’ve always intended to just get through high school with good grades and minimal distractions, a small (almost non-existent) friend group that left you able to make straight a’s and work a small, part-time job.

you’d done a pretty good job of that thus far, no bad boys covered in all black and sliver chains to show you that, maybe, getting out of your comfort zone isn’t such a bad thing after all.  

you met yeonjun during your 7th period study hall a week later than intended, him not showing up to either of the periods your teacher informed you both last week. 

you weren’t surprised in the slightest but also wouldn’t dare tattle on him, simply dodging the questions from your teacher or giving her a polite smile and cryptic answer. 

but you couldn’t even stop the way your eyes widened when the library door opened and he was making his way toward you, black beanie placed on his head along with a dark shirt tight across his chest paired with gray sweatpants that made you bite down on your lip.

his hair was pink now, long with a slight wave to it that looked all too soft and inviting to touch; the color probably shouldn’t work on anyone but, of course, it works on him. 

devastatingly attractive in a way that doesn’t seem fair nor human. 

he hasn’t said a word to you, he wasn’t even within six feet of you yet, but you were already scared shitless. you already didn’t trust yourself to be around him and not make a bumbling fool of yourself. 

a pretty smirk crossed his face when he stood in front of you, looking down at you with a playful look in his eye that was far too mocking and sinister. 

“hey. y/n, right?”

you never would’ve pictured this man saying (or even knowing) your name, nor him looking at you so willingly and intensely, but you have to quickly snap yourself out of it. 

this was as professional a relationship could be between two students and you really had to get it together. 

“hi, yes... that’s me,” you say softly. 

so softly that you’re not even sure he can hear it but you can, unfortunately, hear the tremor in your own voice and it’s nothing but absolute embarrassment. 

he happens to like it though, if the way his eyes light up and his smirk widens tells you anything. 

“i’m yeonjun.”

“i know.”

you say the statement far too quickly and it causes your face to warm, your mouth hanging open as the amusement continues to build behind his eyes; you can see with your own that the boy is too handsome for his own good but something tells you he’s probably far too charming as well. 

“i mean... we were supposed to meet last week,” you attempt to clarify.

it seems like a good save, something to make, both, your embarrassment lessen slightly and for him to know you’re aware that he missed the two sessions last week. 

but it doesn’t seem to work, the boy sitting down across from you with all the confidence and smoothness in the world. he leans in closer and you hold your breath, horribly lonely and touch-starved heart fluttering in your chest. 

“i know, sorry about that,” he says, a genuineness in his voice that you can’t help but question. “i was busy with some things.”

you don’t know what to say so you don’t say anything, not even wanting to think about what kind of things keeps a man like him busy.

your teeth sinks into your bottom lip nervously and you can just feel his eyes burning into you, moving across your pink face and down to your soft white sweater; it makes you look every bit as innocent as he’s presumed you to be and he can’t say it doesn’t make him smile. 

“and yet, the teacher didn’t say anything to me about missing.”

you meet his eyes at his questioning tone, so scrutinizing and intense that you feel very grateful about your decision not to blow up his spot; you don’t even wanna know what he looks like when he’s angry. 

or maybe you do, some darker and suppressed part of yourself thinks. 

“that’s because i didn’t tell her,” you say quietly, a lump forming in your throat that you’re trying desperately to push down. “i didn’t wanna....” 

you almost say tattle and you think your face wold turn an unnatural shade of red if that silly word left your mouth in front of him.

so you meekly and sweetly decide on, “i didn’t wanna get you in trouble,” a smile gracing his face that almost makes you feel like you’d done a good job or something. 

and how ridiculous does that sound? you did a good job for the older, delinquent boy - you don’t know what’s gotten into you. 

maybe his smile and his eyes and just the way he’s looking at you is making you feel as if you’re actually something to look at - you’ve never really been observed the way he’s observing you. 

a deep, melodic chuckle leaving his mouth causes you to swallow nervously, watching him with a blank expression because you’re not sure if he’s laughing at you or with you.

your heart stutters when he leans back to stretch, his arm squeezing at the back of his neck; it takes everything in you not to watch his arm flex.

“how’d i know you were a good girl, hm?”

your eyes widen at his words, stomach swooping in a way that’s only ever happened when you watch couples on tv or read about a romance in books. 

because it’s not only his words, it’s the way he carries himself. the way he’s looking at you and speaking to you, the way you never thought anyone would - let alone him. 

he must mistake your utter...shock and fascination for confusion, eyes wide and cheeks flushed and he suddenly wants to place his hand on your cheek. 

see if it’s as warm and soft as it appears to be in this very moment.

“you were in my lunch last year, no?” he hums, looking directly at you with zero ounce of fear and ever bit of confidence. “always with a textbook or writing something.”

he doesn’t remember all the girls that gawk at him but he remembered you immediately. 

caught your gaze early last year and saw something flicker in your eyes, a soft and innocent fascination he wasn’t used to seeing but immediately made him wanna ruin you - he wanted to ruin you and he didn’t even know you. 

he just knew that he’d watch you sometimes, discreetly and quickly, but enough to get his fix.

when he entered the cafeteria and made sure you were sitting there with your your face buried in a book. 

when you’d get up to buy lunch or a bottle of water, pull down your skirt or adjust your hair in a way that made him wanna touch you in a similar fashion.

when you’d leave five minutes early (in what he fantasized was so you wouldn’t be late) and send him one last glance. feel your soft, hesitant gaze on his face and meet it carelessly at the very last second.

just enough to watch you get shy and see the blush so similar to now cross your cheeks. 

he didn’t know your name and he, truthfully, never intended on learning it. because as much as he wanted to truly ruin you, he knew that’s all it was - a dark, twisted fantasy that someone like him shouldn’t act on. 

but then when he walked in and saw you here, the tutor he was dreading to meet in such a familiar position, he knew immediately that you were her. 

the cute girl from his lunch he wasn’t sure was an angel he wanted to protect or someone he wanted to fuck the shit out of. 

you weren’t sure what to think right now, not wanting to get your hopes up or think too much into his question - you were in my lunch last year, no?

think that you were special and he remembers you for reasons far too fantastical so you only nod, figuring he could be taking a guess; there’s only three lunch periods after all. 

“yeah. your hair was blue.”

a smirk crosses his face, chest warming at the fact you remembered him (even though the cocky, confident part inside of him knew you would). 

“yes it was,” he confirms, smiling down at you in a way that makes your heart jump and pound even more. ”i was hoping you’d remember. because i knew i recognized you from somewhere.”

you don’t know how you’re gonna do this. you can barely look at him, how are you supposed to talk to him and teach him twice a week and actually-

“i do wanna ask you something else though.”

your eyebrows pull together at the slight change in his voice, cocking your head to the side as you look at him.

he’s leaning in a little closer now, tiny pink strands hanging from his beanie as his brown eyes bore into yours. there’s still some amusement twinged in his eyes but it all looks very deceptive, unnerving a part of you that your stupid little heart is ignoring. 

he doesn’t allow you to ask him what before he starts talking again. 

“how about we keep these sessions the way they’ve been?” 

your eyebrow raises as confusion continues to plague you; your sessions haven’t even started? 

you haven’t even taught him anything, what could he possibly- but it’s the moment he opens his mouth to speak again, you realize that’s exactly the point. 

“you tell the teacher i’m coming to these and i’ll tell her what a good job you’re doing. how much i’m learning from you and shit.”

a smirk crosses his face when he peers into your eyes, catching the nervous, unsure look in them that only makes his smirk widen - you really are too cute. 

you, on the other hand, don’t know how you feel about his suggestion; you just know how you feel about lying. 

it doesn’t sit well with you and you don’t wanna get in trouble. 

the teacher has a class during this period so it’s not like she’d come down and check but it still makes you incredibly queasy. 

and if he needed tutoring in the first place, he obviously needs help. he’s a senior and needs to keep his grades up so he can graduate. it’d be your fault if he didn’t pass and you’d hate to be the reason he gets-

movement in front of you causes your thoughts to immediately stop, body freezing as you watch him lift his arm and bring his hand to your head. 

he moves a strand of hair from your face before smoothing out the slight crease in your forehead, biting down on his lip when he feels your skin is just as soft and smooth as he suspected. 

“what are you thinking so hard about?”

the deep, low tone of his voice and inquisitive look on his face is dangerous, almost as dangerous as the frantic beating of your heart and the way it’s about to pound out of your chest. 

it’s like he has electric sparks shooting from his hand, making you feel extremely exposed and vulnerable even though his touch is quite gentle and innocent.

“i.... it’s just....” you stutter out, taking a deep breath because you know you need to get it together fast. “you’ve been having trouble, right? that’s... why you needed tutoring in the first place.”

his eyebrow quirks up at your comment and for a split second, you think you’ve offended him. 

“i don’t want you to fail, yeonjun.”

he doesn’t allow himself to dwell on your words, realize that no one has so openly and sweetly said that to him before. or even cared enough to tell him that they don’t want him to fail.

he knows the teachers and counselors get him help because it’s their job. 

he knows his parents bitch and complain about it because they don’t want him repeating high school or wasting their money. 

he knows anyone who says anything to him about it is just doing it to make themselves look like a good person or friend. 

but you just so openly and sweetly said it, a deep concern in your eyes that he knows he can’t dwell on or his similar feelings are gonna arise from last year’s lunch.

where he’s about to throw caution to the wind and do anything and everything he wants to someone as innocent and sweet as you; but he can’t do that and he knows it, he knows that’s why these session can’t happen - on top of the fact that it’s not only you. 

he smokes during lunch and into this period. 

and there’s just no fucking way he’s spending that time suppressing his predatory attraction to you while learning about shit he doesn’t understand and being high as a kite. 

“you don’t gotta worry about me, angel,” he hums lowly, the name falling so naturally and smoothly from his mouth, he doesn’t even realize. “just do that for me, yeah? then you’ll have 7th free.”

you don’t hear much after he calls you angel, just that he’s asking you to do something for him and you’re blindly and dumbly nodding because he just called you that.

and it’s not until he smiles and thanks you deeply, looking over your face once more before saying that he’ll see you around that you realize you’re alone. 

sitting there as you watch yeonjun walk out the door without a glance back and come to terms with the fact you just agreed to lie to your teacher for him.

for almost a month, you were able to keep it up.

it was terrifying and debilitating and it almost sent you into a full blown identity crisis, but you’d somehow managed to do it.

that was until this afternoon, when your teacher cut through the cafeteria during lunch with a cup of coffee in hand and suspicion in the pit of her stomach. 

she saw you sitting there alone, your own books sprawled out around you as you wrote down notes before her short call of your name had your head snapping up. 

her eyes watching you quizzically made your own widen, stomach sinking and heart starting to pound as he she made her way over to you. 

“hi, y/n. where’s yeonjun today? it’s wednesday.”

the period only began ten minutes ago so it wouldn’t be weird for you to say that he wasn’t here yet. that he got held up after class and would be on his way shortly.

but you were just nervous and so bad at lying that you blurted out that he left to go to the bathroom, her eyes roaming the table in what you could only assume was for his books. 

“he took his backpack with him,” you tell her quietly, smiling softly in an effort to hide your guilt and distress. she only hums softly before nodding her head, taking your word for it because why wouldn’t she?

you’re good and studious and wouldn’t ever lie to a teacher.

but then when she comes down to the library next week during 7th period with her class, catching you at the table by yourself, you do it again. 

look her in the face and panic, make a scene of collecting your books as you tell her you forgot you guys were meeting in the cafeteria today - placing the blame on yourself.

you spent the rest of the period in the bathroom, collecting your thoughts and attempting to calm yourself down because you can’t keep lying. 

you haven’t even talked to yeonjun since the first time you met in the library, only seeing him in passing in the hallway or after school. 

he’ll send you a nod paired with his signature smirk and you’ll send him a small smile back, dipping your head before your cheeks flush at the mere sight of his eyes. 

you wish you hadn’t agree to this. 

you wish he didn’t effect you so much and you wish you could tell him you either need to actually help him or tell the teacher he doesn’t want to, because you’re losing your mind. 

you’re anxious and upset and not feeling good about yourself, barely able to look your teacher in the face these days. 

it’s on a friday before lunch, the bell ringing ready to dismiss you from her class, that it all comes crashing down.

she asked you to stay behind for a moment, everything about her face calm and neutral as you made your way over to her desk. 

you were anything but calm as you stood before her, that familiar feeling of dread and guilt rushing in your stomach as you smiled softly at her and asked if everything was okay. 

“yes, i just wanted to say what a great job you’re doing with yeonjun.”

you don’t even know what your face looks like but you know it’s probably the face of someone incredibly guilty, being praised for something you haven’t been doing and taking credit for it even though you know it’s wrong.

the feeling in your stomach confirms all of those feelings, tight and fluttery and buzzing with upset.

“o-oh?” 

“yeah,” she smiles tightly, looking over your face before speaking again. “we just took our third test and he did great. in the low 90s.”

a part of you desperately hopes that to be true, that maybe he started applying himself and somehow started to grasp the material all on his own. you smile at the thought that that’s the case, nodding your head as you, against your better judgment, keep up the facade. 

“i’m happy for him. he’s been working very hard. w-we studied at our last session for it, actually, and he really seemed to be understanding it.”

the contemplative look she gave you should’ve been the first sign that she knew you were full of shit, a quiet hum leaving her mouth. she holds your gaze until the moment you drop it, looking down at your white sneakers until she calls your name softly. 

“y/n... why have you been lying to me?” 

your lips press together as tears prick your eyes, all of the guilt and shame rushing through you at once. 

“he failed his test and i know you guys haven’t been meeting.”

she knows that because you can’t lie. she knows that because yeonjun still doesn’t know anything and all of the students she’s recommended to you have passed with flying colors. 

she knows because when you look up at her, your lip is trembling and it looks like you’re about to burst into tears.

“i... i’m so sorry.”

but even then, even after this moment right here, you’re still not gonna tell on yeonjun. because you don’t want him getting in trouble and you’re not gonna try to excuse your own behavior by admitting you agreed to it. 

you’re just as at fault as the older boy and you’re not gonna pretend you’re not. 

“why have you been lying? you could’ve just told me if you didn’t feel comfortable tutoring him or it wasn’t working out.”

because she knows yeonjun’s reputation. she knows he’s a year older and that you’re one of the shyer students in her class. she was hesitant at first to even put you two together but thought you’d be able to get through to him. 

and because you don’t know what to say, how to make up an excuse that puts neither of you at fault, you don’t say anything. just continue to apologize with teary eyes and a shaky voice before she eventually lets out a sigh. 

“take the next few days to figure it out. try to work on it with him or come to me and be honest that it’s not gonna work. but you didn’t have to lie to me, y/n. i’m a little disappointed in you.”

those words hit you harder than you care to admit, more tears building as you nod your head and quickly leave the room.

you knew from the beginning that it was wrong.

you never felt good about it and you knew it was bad but you still took part in it. she has every right to be disappointed in you and it feels like everything you worked so hard for has been ruined. 

now you look like a liar who can’t be trusted. 

now any time you tell her about another fellow student you’re working with, like the 7th grader you got through to or the 9th grader you helped get an a on their test, she’s gonna wonder if you really did that.

if you really helped them or if you’re just lying about that, too. telling them the answers to their homework or lazily explaining the concepts to them like you don’t work hard with each and every one of them. 

you’re surprised to see yeonjun when you make it to lunch a few moments later, your stomach still in knots and left over tears in your eyes. 

you don’t even realize you’re standing in front of his table until you hear one of his friend’s deep voices, a brash “who are you?” not even filling you with fear. 

you’re only looking at yeonjun pathetically, wide teary eyes and pouty lips in an effort to hold back more tears.

yeonjun’s dressed in his usual attire but you can’t even focus on that, his pink hair flawless against his black shirt and chain hanging around his neck as he adjusts it carelessly. 

soobin’s words catch his attention before your appearance does, looking at the front of the table and taking in the sight of wide, teary eyes and pouty lips; it pulls at something in his chest more than he cares to admit.

“yeonjun, can i talk to you for a second?” 

your voice is wobbly and timid and everything about it so incredibly embarrassing, the tears in your eyes obvious to all the young men around the table. 

you probably look like some girl he slept with and then left on read, begging him for another chance because your heart can’t take not being with him. because you got attached and now it feels like you need him. 

but, really, you just need him to let you tutor him. 

you can’t disappoint the teacher anymore and you had a job to do with him; you should’ve never told him that lying would be okay. 

“who’s this?” his friend asks with a smirk, his hair a bright shade of purple that looks striking next to yeonjun’s. 

“no one,” yeonjun’s quick to snap, looking at you before quickly getting up and guiding you out of the cafeteria by the small of your back. 

he walks down a secluded hallway and out to the garden of the school, looking at the tears in your eyes and feeling himself frown. 

“what happened?”

“i... she found out we haven’t been meeting,” you mumble, feeling silly and childish for crying in front of him about something like this; but you can’t help how you feel, you can’t help feeling sad and guilty about all of this. 

your heart drops when he actually smirks at you, looking over your face with a gaze that’s just as soft as it is amused.

you’re almost positive he’s about to laugh at you, call you a loser for crying over something as juvenile as getting caught in a silly lie and hurt your feelings even more. 

but then you’re quickly stiffening when his hand reaches up, gently brushing at your tears and marveling in just how soft your skin is. 

“that’s why you’re crying?” 

you’re embarrassed to say the least, any words you’d use to justify your reaction caught in your throat - and the smirk on his face isn’t helping either.

“you’re too pretty to cry over stupid shit like that, y/n.”

“it’s not stupid,” you respond, voice shaky and demeanor meek but still able to talk back. 

because it’s not stupid to you. wanting to be nice and studious and a good person isn’t stupid. not wanting to be a liar or someone who goes back on their word isn’t stupid. 

“she trusted me to help you and i lied to her.”

“we lied to her,” he says, voice and eyes teasing as he bends down to be on your level. you think he’s trying to make you feel better, a soft playfulness on his face that does anything but.

because you aren’t like him. 

you aren’t cool and feared and you can’t not care about how you effect other people. 

“why didn’t you just tell her it was my idea?” he asks suddenly, his eyes roaming your face in such a gentle but curious way. “she probably already knows that.”

“i... i didn’t want you to get in trouble.”

he rises to his full height as a small smile crosses his face, your soft voice and sweet words again effecting him far too much. he shouldn’t feel this way toward you and he shouldn’t want to be tutored now.

he shouldn’t be reaching out to touch the smooth skin of your cheek, a few stray tears making his lips fall into the smallest of frowns as you hear his voice the softest it’s ever been. 

“i wouldn’t get in trouble, angel.”

and there’s that word again. making your wet eyes widen and stomach to flutter, wondering how and why that simple word sounds so nice leaving his mouth. 

maybe because you’ve never been called that before. 

could only imagine being called that by someone, let alone him, in such a way. or maybe it’s because it is him, the boy you watched for months on end, forever fascinated by the way he carried himself. 

or maybe it’s because-

“but even if i did, how’s that your problem? why would you care?”

it’s a fair question you suppose but it doesn’t stop you from licking at your lips nervously, an all too familiar (and embarrassing) blush warming your cheeks. 

“i mean... it’s not,” you mutter shyly, not sure if you’re more intimidated by him calling you out or the look on his face. 

but even with those feelings, you’re still able to meet his gaze. 

take in the deep, dark intensity staring back at you in his brown eyes. they’re softer than one would expect, almost soft enough to make you forget what you were wanting to say. 

“but it’s just as much my fault as it is yours. so it didn’t seem fair.”

he smirks so he doesn’t say anything too brash, looking over the blush on your cheeks. his hand itches to move your hair behind your ear, a move he’d always do because he knew it was charming. 

knew it’d get him laid and get a girl’s heart fluttering.

but now he wants to do it just to touch you, feel your hair and skin and watch the blush on your cheeks deepen; but before he can do anything, he’s surprised to hear you speak anything.

“but it’s also not fair to keep lying,” you say softly, a broken little smile crossing your face as you look at him. “i actually really hated the lying... so if you don’t wanna do the sessions, i’m gonna tell her it’s not gonna work for us. but if you change your mind, i’m still free during those periods.”

at that moment, he had every intention of telling you no. 

he didn’t wanna give up his free time and energy to learn about things he’s absolutely sure he’s never gonna need to know after this. 

he didn’t wanna sit through the sessions high or not get high at all, the only way he’s able to cope with the last period of the school day knowing that he could roll a joint in his car with soobin. 

he didn’t wanna resist his obvious attraction and borderline fascination with you, act on it in a way he knows you’re not ready for and in a way he shouldn’t.

but when he walked in the library on monday, the time he told you he’d get back to you, you looked up and smiled at him. it was such a small, quick smile but everything about it called to him.

the twinge in your eyes and the way your hair fell, how even though your smile was small, it lit up your face and made you the prettiest girl he’d ever seen in his life.

at that moment, you were positive he was about to tell you no.

that thanks but no thanks, he’s absolutely not gonna spend his free period being tutored by a younger student who only stutters and blushes in his presence. 

but when he sat down in front of you, a smirk on his face and eyebrow quirked, you couldn’t even hold back your look of surprise. 

a deep chuckle left his mouth when he caught your expression, the sound one of the best noises you’ve ever heard.  

“what? did you think i wasn’t coming back, angel?”

it took you a month to see yeonjun was just as confident and just as much trouble as you’d expected. 

he was far too charming and attractive and funny, a sarcasm and wit in him that made you muffle your giggles like a middle school girl. 

you weren’t used to talking playfully with the people you tutored, always so focused on getting the work done and making sure you were doing a good job explaining the material for them.

but yeonjun always made sure to delay it, attempt to get to know you before you could even discuss his homework or review sheet; and even though it hasn’t been easy, he’s been persistent in breaking down that wall you put up.

“did the flashcards help or do you think you’re more of a-”

“why don’t you ever go out?”

you suppress the urge to let out a sigh as you turn to look at him, his expressive eyes looking over your face.

you’ve gotten used to the feel of his gaze on you, almost like it was burning into your skin and leaving you exposed to the bone, but it didn’t help when you made eye contact.

looked into his eyes and saw him looking back at you so confidently and so easily, you couldn’t help but feel flustered.

“what do you mean?”

you know exactly what he means but it’s the only thing you could think to say.  

you know more than anyone how much time you spend alone in your room, watching tv series and reading books and reorganizing until you don’t even recognize your own space.

but it’s not that you’re bothered by it, that’s what you like going. not going out isn’t something you find bad or upsetting.

“i mean i see people from your grade at our parties a lot,” he hums lowly, his eyes leaving yours only to look at the soft, pastel pink material of your sweater.

“but you’re never there,” he continues, looking at you and cocking his head to the side questioningly. “why’s that?”

“well, i’m not...invited, i guess,” you mumble out, ignoring the way your cheeks warm even more. “i like sticking to myself. and staying home.”

the words and your tone bring a pout to his face, your eyebrow raising at the sight. why is looking at you like that?

“well now you have an invite,” he says, a teasing smile crossing his face. “come to my friend’s party tonight. soobin, do you know him? he has the purple hair?”

his voice is far too sweet and soft compared to the look in his eye, teasing and flirty and reminding you of just how dangerous he is. how he’s capable of having so many different sides, he nearly gives you whiplash. 

he’s the bad boy everyone thinks of him to be, skipping class and getting high and ditching tutoring lessons by smiling too kindly at a mousy little tutor. 

he’s the play boy you see come out when he looks at you a second too long, bringing a blush to your cheeks and stirring something very unfamiliar in the pit of your stomach. 

but then he has a softer side you see sometimes, like when he decided to do these lessons in the first place because you cried to him and made yourself look even more pathetic. 

“i’m happy you decided to do these,” you say to him quietly. 

it was only your second session but you wanted him to know you were supportive of his decision. that, even if your word meant nothing (because, really, who are you to him?), you were proud of him.

it’s not easy for a senior to give up a period or two to learn about things they don’t understand; you probably wouldn’t wanna do it either, if school and learning didn’t come naturally to you. 

but for whatever reason, he agreed to do it.

“oh?” he hums, the trademark smirk on his face causing your cheeks to warm.

“yeah,” you smile softly, nodding your head before looking down at your clasped fingers. “i just... wanted you to know that. i understand why you didn’t want to but i think it’ll be good for-”

“why do you think i didn’t want to?” 

you look at him and for a split second you’re scared that you offended him. you suppose you don’t really know him well enough to make an assumption about him but you just assumed he-

“or, you know what, no,” he says, shaking his head as he pushes his chair closer to yours. 

he leans over the desk the same way he did during your first meeting last month, bringing your faces closer until you can smell cologne and the faint stench of cigarettes. 

“i wanna hear why you think i changed my mind?”

you quirk an eyebrow as you look at him, staring blankly until you realize he just plans on doing the same. 

“well... i guess it’s because you wanted to do good, right?” you ask meekly, unsure why he changed his mind but knowing that you were happy he did. “and maybe you didn’t wanna disappoint the teacher.”

a deep chuckle leaves his mouth that has butterflies erupting in your stomach, watching as he shakes his head and meets your gaze again. 

“is that no it?” you ask bravely, your wide eyes and confused look causing his own stomach to do flips. “what’s so funny?”

but he’s quick to push it down, reach over to ruffle your hair in a way that makes your eyebrows pull together. 

“nothing, angel,” he mumbles, his eyes roaming yours. you see the exact moment there’s s witch behind them, a flirty and darker front he puts up melting into a soft, vulnerable look.

“but thank you for telling me that. because i’m happy i’m doing them, too.”

he has yet to tell you the reason all these weeks later, probably because you wouldn’t dare ask again, but whatever it was, must’ve greatly inspired him.

because over these weeks, he’s really been putting in the work. writing notes and listening to you and asking questions when he’s not making you blush or inviting you out just for you to decline. 

“so...?” he asks, a charismatic smile stretching across his face as he looks at you awaitingly. “what do you say? you wanna come?”

“no, thank you,” you smile politely, feeling bad for downright denying it but the offer feeling far too similiar to cliche movies you’ve watched. where the popular boy invites the nerd to a party and everyone laughs at her, questions why the hell she’s here and pulls some stupid, immature prank on her.

but this isn’t a movie and you don’t think you even have the capacity to show your face there, nor would anyone care that much to target you. 

dismissing him is easier than really considering you hanging out with him outside of this library. seeing him in a different setting and allowing him to see a different side of you.

not you looking at him pleadingly, your eyes moving to the paper in front of him as you ask him to do the next question.

“i’ll do it if you come tomorrow night,” he says, a sigh leaving your mouth as you look at him in frustration.

“yeonjun...”

because if there’s another thing you’ve learned about yeonjun, it’s that he knows you have trouble saying no to him. it could because he sees the naivety in you, seeing something good in him at times and thinking you’ll really be able to help him.

but maybe he hopes you can help him, too. be a person he can lean on and know 100% is gonna be there for him. 

“c’mon, y/n, don’t you wanna have a little fun?”

“i don’t think i’d find it fun,” you mutter honestly, a pout forming on your lips that has him swearing he’s never wanted to kiss someone as much as he wants to kiss you in this moment.

just brush his lips gently against yours, hear the little sounds and see your reactions that he knows will be the best thing he’s ever had. hold your waist and feel your skin against his that while it’s juvenile to him would be so much to you. 

“you don’t know until you try, y/n,” he mutters lowly, looking up at him and seeing his gaze is, as usual, unrelenting. “have you ever been to a party before?”

of course you’ve been to parties before; birthday parties, graduation parties, wedding parties - but you’ve never been to a high school house party. 

and are you about to tell him that? absolutely not. 

“of course i have,” you mumble, a smirk on his lips because he can tell by the way you avert eye contact that you’re lying. “but it’s just... especially with kids from school who i don’t know? i don’t think it’d be fun, yeonjun.”

“but i’d be there?” he whines, something very uncharacteristic of someone who is known to be a bad boy. “isn’t that fun enough?”

you let out a groan as you frown again, tapping the notebook in front of you lightly as you meet his close gaze. 

“your test is next week, yeonjun. can you please focus on that right now?” 

it’s not until the next session that he thinks to use that to his advantage, supposing he can stand one more party without your presence as he smiles over at you. 

“let’s make a deal, angel.”

you know when he calls you that that you’re not about to talk about school or his test, looking over at him with a raised eyebrow. 

“if i get 100 on my test next week, you come to one of soobin’s party.”

you have to suppress a groan at the way he’s not letting up on this damn party, biting down on your lip as you do your best to give him a serious look.

“you should get the 100 because you want to, not because you’re trying to-”

his finger on your lips is the next thing you’re only able to focus on.

not the pounding of your heart or increasing anxiety at the thought of a party or  the fact that there’s more people in the library than usual today. 

you’re only aware of him touching you, a quiet “sh,” leaving his mouth that has your stomach fluttering far more than you care to admit. 

he meets your wide-eyed gaze and smirks at the look on your face. his finger presses down on your bottom lip gently, dragging it slowly and watching as it pops back up. 

there’s an almost pained look in his eyes that you can’t make out, his eyes never moving from your lips before meeting your gaze again. 

“i want a lot of things, y/n,” he says, his voice deep and gruff and making your heart pound even more as he looks to your mouth again. 

you feel your lower stomach swoop at the way he bites down on his bottom lip, his other hand ghosting over to rest of your knee. 

your uniform skirt comes just above your knees, becoming higher when you sit and perfectly exposing your tight covered legs. his large hand rests on your knee like it completely belongs there, like he’s gonna dare anyone to tell him it doesn’t belong there and to take his hands off you.  

“things i probably shouldn’t tell you yet so your pretty little face doesn’t become beat red,” he mumbles in your ear, his warm breath fanning onto your skin and making a shaky, embarrassing sigh leave your mouth.  

but just him realizing that makes your cheeks flush. everything about his closeness and his words and the way he’s just saying these things to you right in the middle of the library. 

the way his hand is slipping inside of your knee, fingers resting on the inside of your thigh that has some dirty, repressed part of you desperate to spread your legs just a little bit more for him.

feel more of his skin on you and heighten the feeling building in your lower half. 

“but i can assure you, none of them are an on my test. but if that means getting you to spend time with me outside of this fucking hellhole, i’m gonna do it.”

just as fast as his hand was on your thigh, it’s gone and cupping your face. holding on to your jaw as he makes you look at him and has a look of softness and amusement but also darkness and arousal. 

it probably has every bit to do with the fact you let out a tiny squeal when he did so, your eyes widening and legs now spreading apart ever so slightly. 

“do you understand now?” 

you should have the power here being his tutor but you don’t. you’re the cat and he’s the mouse, you’re the prey and he’s the predator and you’re not about to do anything to stop it. 

“ye-yes yeonjun,” you say, a groan almost leaving his mouth at you how compliant you are already. 

and it’s that reaction right there that has him skipping the party on friday and spending his weekend doing something he never thought he’d do his senior year - making flashcards and studying his ass off. 

you remember being incredibly proud when, two weeks later, yeonjun came to your session with his graded test paper in hand. 

he looked happy and accomplished and ready to take on the world, a warm feeling blooming in your chest at the look on his face.

“how’d you do?” you smiled up at him, your eyes soft and expression excited.

when he flipped the test over to reveal his 100% test, your first instinct was to raise your hand for a high five. it’s what you always did with the younger kids, praising them and sharing their excitement over a test that they worked incredibly hard on.

so when you did the same thing to him, quickly realizing he’s not one of your 7th grade students but an absurdly attractive man, your cheeks flushed and you stuttered out a “sorry.”

but he only chuckled lightly and high-fived you immediately, lacing your fingers from across the table before you could pull away. the action caught you off guard more than your nerdy high-five, eyes looking down to your conjoined hands before you gave him an incredulous look.

“what are you doing?” you squeak out, fearing that your hand’s about to get clammy and your heart may explode.

“don’t tell me you don’t remember our deal?”

you realized before you even entered soobin’s house that you made a grave mistake. 

music was pounding through the open windows of the house and a few people were littered across the lawn. a drunken couple sloppily making out while another one fought about someone dancing with a stranger all before ten p.m.

you truly intended on never coming, telling yeonjun you seriously could not go through with this and had to flake out on your deal. 

but he’d been so proud of his test. not just because it meant you were coming but because it showed him he was actually capable - or at least, that was the story he told you.

and whether you were silly and naive to believe him was on you since now, you’re walking into a party looking like someone’s holding a weapon to your back. 

“so i’ll see you tonight, right?” 

you were still hesitant even during 7th period this afternoon, looking at yeonjun with a pained expression. 

“yeonjun... i really don’t know if i can do it.”

“why not? i’m gonna be there, just for you.”

you swallow down a bold, sassy remark that he’s gonna be there anyway, probably to remind your fluttering heart not to think too much into his comment. 

but is him being there enough to make you go? or is that scaring you more? seeing him outside of school, around his friends, in an environment where he can be even more bold and daring. 

after all, being in the school library didn’t stop him from creeping his hand up your inner thigh.

“i don’t just wanna follow you around all night and bother you like a lost puppy,” you whine quietly, knowing this was part of the deal but seeing just how impossible it is. 

“how could you think you’d bother me?” he asks, his head cocked to the side just as the bell ringing interrupts you. 

you let out a sigh as you stand to gather your books. you can feel his watchful eyes on you, attempting to ignore it as you silently get ready to go to next period. 

he mistakes you walking away from the table to throw out a stray sheet of paper as you leaving, quickly rising from his feet and pulling you back into him. your body collides with his before he presses you against the table, the library nearly empty as the loud chatter of students can be heard from the hallways. 

“were you gonna leave without answering me?”

his voice is deep and has a certain dominating darkness behind it, your eyes raising to his just in time to see him cock an eyebrow up. 

“i... i was gonna throw this out,” you answer dumbly, raising the crumpled up paper behind your back. 

he hums thoughtfully before taking it from your hand, crumbling it up and tossing it in the nearest garbage can. he misses but makes no attempt to pick it up, keeping you pinned between him and the table with no qualms about it. 

“you missed,” you point out obviously. 

a smirk crosses his lips as he lets out a hum, bringing his hand up to smooth out a piece of your hair. 

“i’m gonna ask again,” he mumbles lowly in your ear, his large body and deep voice quickly making your breaths quicken. 

“how could you think you’d bother me when i spent my entire weekend studying for that test?” he asks, his hands snaking down your body before gently resting onto your hips. 

him pulling you closer causes another shaky sigh to leave you, your low, warning mumble of his name only making him smirk. he shouldn’t like this so much, how you sound so sweet and flustered and are allowing him have you like this. 

“that was all for you, angel. not for me or the teacher or my parents or anyone else. just you. because i wanna hang out with you.”

you swallow the nervous lump in your throat as you raise your eyes to meet his, the playfulness that was in them turning the slightest bit dark. something in them making you lick over your lips as you try to calm your racing heart.

“you won’t even know when i’m there. how am i gonna find you?”

it’s the worst excuse you could have ever thought of but you’re not surprised since yeonjun was pressed against your body and breathing down your neck the way he was. 

he chuckled lowly like he also knew it was the worst excuse you could’ve thought of, taking your phone from the table. he slides it open and looks to you, his eyebrow raised when you just continue to stare at him blankly. 

then you remember, like every other teenager in the world, you have a lock on your phone.

“0319.”

he smirks at how easily you give it up, tapping a few buttons on the screen before handing it back to you.

“i put my number in there. text me when you’re there, 

so even with a pit in your stomach and anxiety coursing through your veins, you go to his new contact name and type out “i’m here.”

you’re faintly aware of the fighting couple’s voices growing louder, his deep groans mixed with her higher pitched whines causing you to look over. 

“i saw you touch her waist!” the girl yelps, her hands on her hips with a very obvious look of distaste. “so obviously you didn’t mind! maybe you should dance with her the rest of the night!”

“maybe i will, since you’re so god damn annoying,” he yells back, your lips falling into a frown. 

the girl meets your gaze and it’s then you recognize her as a girl in your grade. she’s from the popular group but is one of the nicer ones, always smiling politely at other students and listening to teachers during their lessons. 

she almost looks embarrassed to be caught in this scenario, a broken smile crossing her face before her boyfriend notices your gaze; you don’t recognize him, so you think he must be in yeonjun’s grade. 

“what the fuck are you looking at?”

your cheeks flush as you immediately snap your head away, quickly becoming scared and uncomfortable. you can hear her chastising him but just want to be away as soon as possible, the prospect of this drunk man cursing at you somehow worse than a house full of strangers.

yeonjun hasn’t answered your text but you still take a deep breath as you walk toward the front door, immediately hit with the scent of alcohol, b.o. and weed. there’s loud music blaring from the speakers and making the house vibrate, bodies littered throughout the house as they all talk loudly and dance.

your eyes scan the room for his pink hair, stomach sinking when you see no sign of him. 

is he even here yet? he told you he was coming at nine but could he be running late? or did he forget entirely, ignore your text as a joke and now you have to-

“hey. how do i know you?” 

the first thing you see is purple hair and you’re immediately thrown back into the crowded cafeteria all those months ago. when you so boldly went up to yeonjun with tears in your eyes and he was quick to pull you away. 

you remember the boy in front of you asking who you were, the same curiosity in his eyes now as you stand in his house looking extremely uncomfortable and out of place. 

“i... my name’s y/n,” you begin quietly, the boy barely able to hear you over the music and loud chatter. “i had to talk to yeonjun during lunch once so i went up to your table and-”

“well shit, so you’re her.”

there’s a smirk on his face and gleam in his eye, like he knows something you don’t. you cock your head to the side in confusion, watching as his smirk widens and he nods his head approvingly. 

“his tutor, right? he told me about you.”

“oh... yeah,” you say quietly, because yeah, that would make sense - his friends probably wonder where he goes during his free period now; there’s a few beats of awkward silence before he speaks up again.

“so what are you doing here?”

your cheeks flush and you wish you could blame the stuffiness of his house, looking to him as you stutter out that yeonjun invited you. 

“did he now,” he hums, his eyes roaming your face and stopping on your cheeks. he doesn’t know what exactly yeonjun wants from a girl like you but he has to be honest in saying he sees the appeal. 

“follow me then, sweetheart. you want a drink?”

you shake your head before following behind him, making eye contact with one too many intimidating boys and girls before landing on your feet. everyone’s in pretty heeled boots and crop tops, dancing and singing and grinding like they don’t have any cares in the world. 

like they’re not terrified and dreading being here, even with the knowledge that the attractive boy they may or may not have developed a crush on is lingering  around.

“oh, yeonjunnie,” you hear soonbin whine sarcastically, your eyes shooting up just in time to see his familiar black attire. his pink hair is poking out of his black beanie, the chain around his neck hanging low as he turns to look at his friend. 

“i found someone for you,” the boy says before yeonjun can respond, bringing you around to the front. 

you’re in the middle of both boys who tower over you and you’re not sure if you’ve ever felt more threatened; especially because when yeonjun looks at you, you’d think he didn’t know your name. 

because he doesn’t give you a hi or a smile or even a flicker of recognition in his gaze.

he looks at you and simply says, “well, shit, i didn’t think you’d actually come,” with such a handsomely conniving smirk, you’re not sure what to think in that moment. 

because it seems as if all your silly, irrational fears are coming true in this moment. very much like the movies you’ve seen and scenarios you’ve pictured where you’re humiliated at a party or by the popular boy. 

but his smile and his words seemed so genuine. he’s seemed so genuine getting to know you these past few months, how could he have faked it so well? 

the way your face drops and cheeks warm cause his heart to break a little, still all too aware of the questioning eyes and lingering looks thrown your way. 

“didn’t you invite her?” soobin questions, looking between you and him and noting how embarrassed you look.

“i did,” is all yeonjun responds. no rhyme or reason or answer as to why he did. just that he did. so it could very well be a joke. 

“well then, welcome, y/n,” soobin responds, reaching his hand out to you. “i’m soobin, in case we weren’t formally introduced.”

you give him a tight smile, yeonjun’s piercing gaze on yours as you take soobin’s large hand in yours. 

“nice to meet you.”

your voice is soft and shaky and brings more heat to your cheeks, wanting to die when soobin rips up one of his friends for you to sit on the couch.

“i don’t mind standing,” you insist, shaking your head and offering a small smile to the other boy.

“no, no, pretty girls shouldn’t stand,” soobin says with a smirk, catching the way yeonjun’s eyes roll and jaw clenches; it all goes unnoticed to you, though, too busy sitting down and looking at your hands nervously folded into one another.

“so y/n,” soobin says, sitting down across from you and leaning forward the same way yeonjun does during his tutoring sessions. “what’s it like to tutor this idiot?”

his words are laced with affection, as are his actions as he ruffles yeonjun’s beanie playfully, but they still make you frown. still make you wanna defend him in front of others and ensure that he’s not an idiot. 

“he’s great actually,” you say softly, lips pulled up in a soft smile. “very smart and learns fast. definitely not an idiot.”

you look to the boy to see him staring blankly at you, heart sinking in your chest; you’re becoming increasingly uncomfortable in this environment and a big part of it as to do with his attitude. 

you weren’t expecting him to be overly excited, kiss your feet upon seeing you arrive or proclaim an irrational excitement. but it kind of seems as if, right now, he could care less that you’re here.

“ahh, that’s cool then,” soobin smiles. “you’re a year younger than us, right?” 

you can only hum a small “mhm,” yeonjun’s gaze burning into your face causing you to look at him. 

it’s the same soft, wide-eyed look you give him during your sessions but right now, it’s making him feel far too unsettled. like people seeing him with you are gonna show them a different side to him he has yet to acknowledge. 

“why’d you decide to come?” he asks, not being able to stop the words; he already knows the answer, he basically begged you too. 

and because you’ve been nothing but sweet and soft to him, he’s not surprised when you don’t throw it in his face that he’s the one who enforced this. that he studied for nights to pass that test so you’d feel inclined to come. 

“i thought it’d be fun,” you say sweetly, i thought we’d be able to have fun outside of school like you claimed to have wanted. “i don’t really come to parties a lot.”

“i can’t imagine why, you seem really sweet and funny,” soobin says, a flirty smile on his face that makes a blush creep up on your cheeks; he’s so bold and confident, you don’t know both of them do it. “you should come to more.”

seeing that shade of pink on your cheeks from someone else angers yeonjun more than he cares to admit, throwing his friend a dirty look before growling at him to shut up. 

“why? she’s sweet, isn’t she? maybe i need to be tutored too,” soobin says, throwing a smile your way as he plops down in the spot next to you. “what periods are you free? maybe we can go out for lunch and have a session.”

“i... i’m not allowed to leave for lunch.”

that’s a school rule - only seniors are allowed to leave for lunch. but with the way soobin laughs and yeonjun hold back a smirk, the other people littered around also letting out soft chuckles, it appears that’s something not many people follow. 

“you can with me,” soobin assures, patting your knee softly as he sends another charming smile your way. “i’ll make sure you don’t get in trouble.”

you smile in an effort to downplay your embarrassment and discomfort, an annoyed sigh leaving yeonjun as he rises from his seat. he looks even more big and broad surrounded by these people for some reason, in his element where he fits in like a glove.

it’s even more evident that you don’t fit in here - at least in the library, that’s a place you belong. the quiet, the smell of books, the solidarity, a keen sense of-

“i’m getting another drink.”

yeonjun’s words are short and deep as he quickly gets up, hauling ass to the kitchen before anyone can even respond to him. his friend must see the look on your face too, a small pout on your lips that has the boy frowning next to you.

“don’t worry about him, he’s grouchy tonight,” soonbin says reassuringly, wrapping his arm around you affectionately. “some girl stood him up.”

the first thing you feel is a blow to your chest, an unfamiliar pain right in the center as you register soobin’s words; he begged you to come tonight but was waiting for another girl.

probably one of the many college girls, who are prettier and funnier and more charismatic than you.

so, really, you can’t be surprised. you were silly to think he liked you in the way you thought, in the way you’ve come to discover you like him because he makes you smile and laugh and feel warm inside.

but even so, you’re hurt.

you’re hurt and embarrassed and feel humiliated even though no one knows the real reason you came here and stepped way out of your comfort zone. thank god for that, you think, because it’d be even more horrible if people knew you came for yeonjun, all while he was waiting for someone else.

“oh,” you manage to squeak out, a soft look on your face despite the pain and embarrassment inside of you. “that’s too bad.”

“yeah,” soobin says, looking at you with sympathetic eyes you know you can’t trust. “he’ll be good, though.”

you bet he will, you think, because that’s just who choi yeonjun is. he doesn’t care who he strings along or makes believe is special - he’s gonna do what he wants when he wants it with no regard for how it effects other.

even a sweet little meek tutor he was able to get under his thumb the first day he met her.

when yeonjun returns, he can tell immediately that something is wrong with you. your hands are clasped together and you’re biting the inside of your cheek, fiddling nervously as you listen in on the conversation around you.

you meet his gaze and he’s quick to look away, one because he got caught and two because he doesn’t know if he can handle the look in your eye right now.

you’re always almost about to make him crack, break down into being someone worthy of you, and he doesn’t wanna do that tonight. doesn’t wanna show everyone here that, if he wants to, he can be a worthy person.

you’re a second away from breaking before soobin asks if you wanna dance, a tight smile on your face as you shake your head.

“i... i’m actually gonna go outside for a sec,” you say, knowing full well you’re gonna book it to your car and never return. “it’s hot in here. i need some air.”

“there’s plenty of air in here, angel,” soobin remarks, your eyes widening at the term.

it sounds different coming from his mouth, not as deep and melodic and it doesn’t let off a bunch of butterflies in your stomach. you’re too busy giggling softly as you shake your head that you don’t hear the deep, low noise of distaste leave yeonjun’s mouth.

you only see him grab soobin’s arm when he tries to get up to follow you, a lowly growled “let her go,” that makes your eyebrows pull together; you don’t know if he’s trying to hurt your feelings on purpose but he’s certainly doing it a lot tonight.

it feels like you can finally take a deep breath when you get outside, no one around except the chilly air and starry sky. it makes you feel a bit better, sinking down on the stairs and humming contently when your hands meet the cold concrete.

you passed by the dancing people and laughing, smiley couples inside and felt silly for coming here. silly for thinking yeonjun wanted you in his life without him getting something out of it.

what would he want from you anyway? what could you possibly give him when he’s already had so much better?

tears prick your eyes and you bury your face in your hands, taking deep calming breaths so the harsh winter air doesn’t feel like it’s burning you.

you avoided boys and feelings like this for so long and with good reason; you’re too sensitive and naive and always try to see the good in people.

you’ll put your feelings aside in order to spare someone else - you saw it in the beginning, pushing down your qualms about lying to the teacher to further appease a boy you found cute.

and when you put it like that, it sounds really fucking stupid. it sounds like, maybe, you’re just-

“didn’t i tell you you’re too pretty to cry over stupid things?”

your first instinct is to turn around when you hear his voice, his tall, dark figure looming behind you. 

you should probably smile shyly or say that you’re not crying but you can only stay silent, turning back around to avoid his intense gaze and your own humiliation. 

the same way he should probably go inside and carry on with his night the way he usually would. drinking and flirting and dancing before he probably brought someone home or into the bathroom. 

when he moves behind you, that’s what you think he’s about to do. 

but then he’s walking around your sitting frame and bending down to you, looking up at you from his crouched position. his hand reaches out to touch your face, forcing it up so you can only stare at him with teary eyes and flushed cheeks.

there’s a frown on his face as he runs his thumb across your cold cheek, his gentle touch a shocking contrast to his harsher appearance. 

“what happened?”

what happened? you think, not used to feeling so snarky and hurt. what happened was that he got your hopes up, was nice to you and invited you and kept making you feel special, just for them to come crashing down.

but then the more you think about it, the silence between you getting longer and longer, the guiltier you feel - because your feelings aren’t his fault.

you taking his looks and kindness and lingering touches for something deeper was a mistake. you know the kind of boy he is and have still been foolish enough to fall for him.

“nothing,” you grumble, a wet, humorless laugh leaving you as you shake your head. “i’m just being silly.”

but you can’t look up from your feet, your eyes roaming the cracks in the concrete, and that’s how he knows you’re lying; that, and because he knows he was being a fucking dick. 

but seeing you in this environment was weird for him. seeing people look at you and look at him, specifically soobin who got it out of him that he might like you, was unfamiliar for him.

the same way this was unfamiliar for you - which is why he wants you to talk to him. 

“what happened, y/n?” he asks, voice a tad bit harsher and deeper as he cranes his neck down. he hears your harsh, nervous intake of breath and resists the urge to reach out and touch you. 

you need to answer him before he can touch you. 

but you never do. not after ten seconds and not after a minute, prompting him to let out a sigh and pop his neck to the side. your face pulls into a grimace at the crack that sounds through the air. 

his cold hand touching your face causes you to jump, your eyes meeting and a lump forming in your throat; his eyes fool you too much and that’s exactly the problem here.

“talk to me, angel, c’mon.”

your eyes start to burn when a harsh wind passes, tears stinging your eyes and coldness rushing over your face. why does he have to keep calling you that? why does his voice have to sound so sincere and why does he have to look at you the way he is right now?

like he cares so much and hopes those tears aren’t because you’re sad.

“there’s nothing to talk about, yeonjun,” you blurt out, anger and humiliation seep into your tone before you can stop it. you let out a sigh as you try to get it together, taking a few calming breaths before shaking your head. 

“just go back inside, okay? i’m going home. t-thank you for inviting me but i-”

“i don’t want you to go.”

he blurts the words so loud and fast, it even sounds a little awkward to your ears. but he sounds and looks almost desperate, your eyebrows pulling together and heart sinking as you take a deep breath.

because you know you can’t stop the next words from tumbling out of your mouth.

“well, it doesn’t seem like you want me here.”

your words are soft and quiet but they still physically pain his chest, his eyes roaming your face as he brings them to your cold cheeks. he wipes under your eye when wetness forms, the cold biting wind rushing around you both. 

“i want you,” he reassures quietly, his voice just as low and gravely as he speaks hushly to you; he thinks it’s the most honest and true thing he’s ever said to someone. “i want you more than you know.”

“then why are you acting like that?” you question sweetly, the pout on your lips nearly making him groan and cover them with his. “you were being... mean. i felt like... you didn’t want me here at all. or didn’t want people to know you invited me.”

your words break his heart but he also knows they’re true, his fingers caressing your face gently. he notices then how freezing and red it is, looking you over and rising from his feet.

you look disappointed that he’s gonna leave, your face falling and eyebrows furrowing before he reaches his hand down to you. 

“let’s talk in my car,” he clarifies, nodding his head toward his vehicle. “it’s freezing out here.”

you bite down on your lip, contemplating it for a few seconds before another harsh gust of wind passes. you let out a sigh as you take his hand, grateful to enter his car the moment you sit down. 

he turns it on and the engine roars to life, his fingers reaching out to turn on your heated seat. 

the next few moments only consist of the car’s engine warming up as you wait for the heat to kick on, you and yeonjun stealing glances back and forth at each other; you both miss the others gaze by a few seconds and if anyone were to be watching, it’d be obvious you both were nervous right now. 

dancing along the line you’re both nervous to cross for entirely different reasons - you because you somehow don’t think he reciprocates those feelings and him because he knows you deserve more. 

but in this moment, he decides he has to be selfish. watching you with a flush in your cheeks and your lip drawn into your mouth.

“i like you, y/n. that’s why i wanted you here,” his voice says, breaking the silence in a way that almost seems more terrifying. “but that’s also why i didn’t... want people knowing.”

your eyebrows pull together and immediately your mind goes to him being embarrassed. embarrassed that you’re younger and quiet and that no one really knows who the hell you are.

he’s infamous and cool and a senior, obviously he should be with someone similiar. like a popular girl in his grade or a college girl or maybe even a the girl who stood him up.

“not because of you, angel, but because of...”

“you?” you interrupt, a snark in your tone neither of you except; but you’ve heard this line one too many times, not expecting to ever ever hear it real life, let alone toward you. 

“it’s not you, it’s me?” you ask, a gentle, faux smile on your face as you shake your head at him. “is that what you’re about to say?”

he clenches his jaw so he doesn’t smirk, resisting the urge to laugh as he looks you over carefully. it’s obvious your smile’s fake because it doesn’t meet your eyes, the teary glint in them every bit sad as they are frustrated. 

but of course, you’re too sweet to treat him as he deserves. 

his hand reaches out to grab your chin, his thumb and pointer finger on either side as he forces your gaze to his. his smirk comes through when he hears your sharp intake of breath, tongue peeking out to lick at his lips. 

“if you let me talk, angel, you’d know what i was about to say,” he hums quietly, his breath fanning into your face at his closeness. it smells of mint and beer, it should probably be gross but surprisingly isn’t.

his words successfully stir you into silence, partially from fear and partially because the look in his eye has caused you to grow warm all over; and once he sees that, he begins to speak again.

“i didn’t want people knowing because i didn’t want anyone fucking with you, y/n. because if they did, i’d have to ruin them and then everyone would see it.”

“see what?” you ask quietly, the air between you thick and buzzing as you hold his gaze. 

hold it so adamantly and intensely, you’re barely able to register him leaning closer. inch by inch by inch, until his lips are pressed against yours and you’re kissing choi yeonjun in the front seat of his car. 

you’re stiff and awkward and don’t really know what to do but it’s fine because he laces his fingers in your hair and pulls you closer. parts your lips with his tongue which causes you to kiss him back with a slow, unsure pace.

but it only causes him to smile, retracting his tongue and keeping it sweet before he pulls back and rests his head on your forehead. 

“why i decided to spend my free period during senior year getting fucking tutored, angel,” he chuckles lowly, his hand running through your hair gently. 

the soft look in his eye causes you to swallow nervously, words caught in your throat as you stare at him wide-eyed.

“i... i thought you... you said it was...” you let out a shaky breath as you try to get your thoughts together, completely unable to remember your conversation from weeks ago. when he cryptically asked you your thoughts about just why he agreed to stop lying to the teacher and do the sessions; 

so instead, your cheeks warm and you’re hit with the reminder that you just had your first kiss with him. and that you were probably absolutely terrible at it. 

“that was my first kiss. i... i’m sorry if it was bad.”

a small smile crosses yeonjun’s face as he shakes his head at you, thumb dragging down your cheek gently to feel the warm, smooth skin of your cheek. 

“it was perfect, angel, you’re perfect.” he mumbles, your eyes widening and heart stuttering as a ball forms in your throat. “so perfect that i thought you stood me up and weren’t coming. so let’s go on date. a real date, this time.”

in the beginning of the school year, you would’ve never imagined your study sessions with yeonjun would be turning into dinner dates; but as you sit in your room and get ready, your heart pounding and palms sweaty, that’s exactly what’s happened. 

it’s the fourth date you guys are going on and you can officially say that you really, really have feelings for yeonjun. you’re still shy and nervous around him but it’s only because he’s more comfortable with you too.

he takes your hand with ease and laces your fingers together that he was meant to do that.

he’ll shamelessly peck a kiss to your lips and deepen it at any given time, your cheeks burning and embarrassed voice telling him to stop when he did it in the middle of the bowling alley last week. 

he’ll watch you and smile at you and just touch you with the softest of intentions, you almost can’t believe this is the bad boy everyone claims is so mean and heartless. 

you say almost because you still don’t do it in school. it’s still a somewhat... secret fondness you have for one another. he’ll play with your fingers under the table during sessions and wink at you in the hallway but that’s about it. 

he’d probably never kiss you in the hallway or cafeteria but you also wouldn’t want that. it would draw way too much attention and probably leave your face with a permanent, embarrassing flush. 

“are you going out?” you hear your mom ask, her head peeking in before a smile brightens her face. “aw, you look beautiful, y/n. yeonjun must be coming soon.”

the topic of dating had been undeniably embarrassing with your parents, mostly because they couldn’t believe you were showing an interest. but they welcomed yeonjun with open arms, insisting to meet him at the front door to ensure he was a nice boy.

and oh had he really showed you just how charming he could be. 

“mom,” you whine in embarrassment, her laugh echoing in your room as he throws her arms up defensively. 

“you guys be careful. it’s supposed to rain soon.”

you nod your head as you finish getting ready, smoothing over your hair once more before your phone vibrates against your desk. he texted you that he was on his way with a smiley face and heart, sending one back before looking at yourself in the mirror. 

you don’t know what the hell he sees you or why he likes you but you know if you dwell on it, you’ll talk yourself out of everything. convince yourself that this is all a joke and he’s gonna turn around and say he pities you. 

even though, when you brought this up to him, he was quick to calm those worries. 

“c-can i ask you something, yeonjun?”

you were walking home from the movies with your hands intertwined.

the cold, harsh winter had blossomed into spring, the night air growing less frigid; there was a still a bit of a chill but it was nothing a jacket and yeonjun’s warm body couldn’t fix.

“of course, angel,” he mumbles lowly, a small smile on his face as you stop in your tracks. he’s quick to follow, eyebrow raising and body turning so he can look down at you. 

he cocks his head to the side when you don’t speak for a few seconds, his lips falling into a pout as his hand tightens in yours.

“you okay?” he asks quietly, thumb tracing small circles into your skin. 

you lick over your lips nervously, feeling silly for the need to ask this question but it’s one you can’t help. it wracks your mind over and over again and it feels like you’re about to-

“why do you like me?” you blurt out, unaware you even said the words until you notice yeonjun’s face morph into one of surprise. 

his mouth opens and closes for a moment, brows pulled together as he tries to make sense of your words.

“i mean, what’s not to like?” he asks softly, taking you by the hips and pulling you closer to him. 

you’re in the middle of the sidewalk but there’s no one around, the sky dark and streets desolate as you both meet each others gazes - yours full of doubt and his full of confusion. 

“i... i don’t know,” you mumble sheepishly, looking down at your intertwined hands. “i just... it doesn’t really make sense.”

“why? because i’m older? because you’re smart and i’m not?” he teases, your panicked eyes immediately meeting his.

“no! more like the exact opposite,” you clarify as you shake your head. “because you’re popular and attractive and charming and i’m just.... not.”

his eyes roam your face and his heart sinks when he sees the doubt and nerves continue to grow. how you really feel this way about yourself and are pondering the idea that someone like him would want someone like you, when really, it should be the opposite. 

“y/n, i’m lucky that you’re settling for me,” the pink-haired boy laughs out, squeezing your hips reassuringly. “you’re good and sweet and so fucking beautiful. i wanted you the second i saw you, you know, but knew i shouldn’t.”

your eyes widen at his words, shock behind them that has a laugh bubbling from his chest. 

“in lunch. i noticed you the first day and thought you were an angel,” he says, the nickname he always calls you particularly getting the butterflies going tonight. 

“i could tell that you were good. you just have this.. aura, y/n, and i knew that i would taint it. i knew you deserved someone way better. because i’m not good like you.”

"yes you are,” you respond immediately, a frown appearing on your face as you shake your head. “you pretend not to be, but you are, yeonjun. i can see it.”

“you can see it because i wanna be good around you, baby. i wanna be someone good for you.”

tears prick your eyes as a lump forms in your throat, overwhelmed and unsure of how to respond to that. he smiles softly as he takes in your face, leaning forward to press his lips against your forehead. 

he inhales your sweet, vanilla smell while you take in his cologne and faint scent of cigarettes, swallowing down the lump and praying you don’t burst into tears on the spot. 

“don’t doubt yourself, angel,” yeonjun mumbles against your head, puling you closer until your flush against his warm, broad body. “i’m the one who got lucky here.” 

even though it meant wasting away in the fucking library. 

“the library isn’t that bad, yeonjun,” you whine ten minutes later in his car, heat blasting and music low as he drives to the restaurant. one hand’s on the steering wheel while the other’s laced with yours, your body turned in his black leather seat to look over and chastise him. 

he confessed to you that your sessions were the first time he’d ever stepped foot in that library; he hadn’t even been positive that school had a library until he walked through the door that day. 

“it smells like dust and the librarian’s a bitch.”

“she is not!” you squeal, smacking his arm lightly as you throw him a chastising look. “she’s just a little... misunderstood. people don’t respect her space.”

even you can admit sometimes she does go a little overboard; you saw her once lecture a younger student for a half hour because they mistakenly put a book on the wrong shelf. 

“you’re too nice, baby. maybe even a little biased, since you’re the only one she seems to tolerate.”

“probably because i’m there every day,” you tease lightly, your eyes widening playfully before a loud crack of thunder causes you to jump in your seat.

your mom hadn’t been kidding when she said there was gonna be a storm tonight. you’d ran to yeonjun’s car shielding the top of your head, rain pelting down and wind howling as your mom’s “be careful!” got drowned out.

and right now, it only seemed to be getting worse. 

“you scared of thunder?” 

you hear the smirk in yeonjun’s voice and resist the urge to stick your tongue out, not about to admit that, yes, you’re nearly an adult but still terrified of rain and thunder. 

“no, of-of course not,” you grumble, snatching your hand away from his. “it just surprised me.”

yeonjun looks over at you and sees the nervousness all your face, not commenting as he silently snatches your hand back. he intertwines your fingers as he raises your hand to his mouth, pressing his lips against it while he drives through the rain.

it’s getting considerably heavier by every second, his foot pressing off the gas every time he drives past a puddle. 

“i used to be scared of the rain, you know.” 

you look over at him and see him looking peacefully at the road, pink strands of hair hanging in his face. 

“oh, yeah? when you were like five?”

“twelve,” he corrects with a smile, doing his best to distract you from the chaos outside. “i used to wake up crying, sometimes. i know that’s hard to believe now. because i’m so cool and what not.”

“oh please,” you giggle out, the sweet sound filling the car also distracting him from the pounding of rain and crackling of thunder; he’s outgrown his fear of storms but even he can admit this one is a little bit scary right now. 

“what, you don’t think? i’ll have you know-”

the skidding of his tires mixed with your frightened screams is the next thing he hears, a strangled “yeonjun!” in the background as he attempts to take control of his car.

there’s the boom of thunder and lightning and loud blares of horns before everything goes still, his body acting on auto pilot as he safely pulls off on the side of the highway.

his first concern isn’t damage to his car or the heightening storm outside - it’s you in his passenger seat, eyes closed tight and tears on your face. 

“are you okay?” yeonjun’s voice frantically asks, barely able to feel the sensation of his his warm hands on your face. your heart’s pounding and your hands are shaking and for a moment, you thought you were about to die. 

your eyes pop open to meet his and the concern in them only makes your eyes water more, bottom lip trembling as you nod your head. 

but even though you’re nodding he sees you’re not. he sees you trying to catch your breath and your eyes looking back and forth nervously outside.

“hey, hey, angel. it’s okay. i’m here,” he hums lowly, his thumbs running over your face soothingly. “i’m here and you’re okay.”

you attempt to catch and slow your breaths as your eyes never leave his, his only leaving you to quickly assess you for injuries.

“i know that was scary. i’m sorry. i should’ve been more careful.”

“it wasn’t your fault,” you squeak out, swallowing the knot in your throat as you shake your head. your eyes roam his and you pout when there’s guilt and sorrow in his eyes, your own hand snaking down to hold his hand. 

“are you okay?”

his eyes soften as he cups your face and brings you to closer to him, a quiet “yes, baby,” leaving his mouth before he places his lips on your forehead.

you breathe in his scent and he breathes in yours, not allowing himself to pull away until he feels you relax under him.

“i’m gonna drive us to my house, okay?” he says, his eyes back on you looking cautious. “we can order food. i just don’t want us driving in this if it’s gonna get worse.”

you nod your head before reaching down to grasp one of his hands tightly, his small smile meeting you before he carefully pulls back onto the highway. 

the storm gets substantially worse as he makes his way to his house, hand grasping yours tightly as he drives slow and steady. 

he’s flooded with relief when he finally pulls in his driveway, running around the passenger side door to help you out. his hand doesn’t leave the small of your back until you’re in his room, a big space with white walls and black furniture that doesn’t surprise you in the slightest.

contrary to most teenage boy’s rooms, his smells really good. like a mix of his cologne, laundry detergent and a distinct smell you’ve just deemed as his natural scent.

it’s comforting and makes you feel at ease, licking over your lips nervously as you realize this is the first time you’ve been in a boy’s room.

“you want anything to drink?”

“i...i’m good,” you say, sitting on his bed as you look around.

there’s no decor on the walls except for a large flat screen tv across from his bed and above his dresser, a pile of clothes off to the side. 

“sorry, i didn’t expect to have anyone over so it’s a little messy.”

you look over at him sitting beside you, a sheepish smile on his face. you think it’s the first time he’s ever sounded somewhat... nervous and out of his comfort zone. 

maybe because he knows you’ve never been in this situation before. 

“it’s okay, i like your room,” you smile, spreading your fingers out across his soft, dark comforter. “it’s very fitting.”

“oh yeah?” he smirks, inching closer to you and making your heart speed up. “and why’s that?”

there’s that dark playfulness you’re so used to seeing swarming behind his eyes, just as teasing as it is intense that makes you hold back a squeak. he quirks his eyebrow as he moves closer, pink tongue peeking out to roll over his lips.

you can’t help when your eyes fall to them, missing the feel of them on yours. 

you two haven’t gone past making out, a clash of tongues and teeth that have you quietly moaning into his mouth. but when your body acts on its own accord, pushing yourself closer to him or grasping at the bottom of his shirt, he always stops you.

“what are you doin’ baby?”

you were in his car after a tutoring session, the parking lot of the school completely deserted. your cheeks flush and you immediately draw your hands back, lowering your head slightly as embarrassment took over. 

“i...i thought that was...don’t you wanna...”

because clothes come off, that’s how it starts - you know that much.

and you can feel how much he wants to go further, the hardness under you that scared you at first now the thing begging you to go further.

you feel wanted and desired and even though you’re scared, you want to go further.

“we don’t have to do anything, baby. this is fine,” he says softly, his hand reaching up to cup your cheek. 

“but i want to,” you mumble, not even sure if he can hear your words because of how quiet you are. 

you know he must though because he draws his fingers under your chin to lift your face, eyes heavy of fondness and arousal making your stomach flutter more. 

your first instinct is to assume he doesn’t want you - why else would he stop you? but you can see in his eyes that he does...right? because it really does look like that.

what other reason would he have to stop you though? maybe he just doesn’t-

“whatever you’re thinking is probably wrong,” yeonjun mutters, tightening his hold on you and bringing you closer to him. “i don’t wanna go further with you while we’re in the car, angel. you deserve more than that.”

“hm?” you hear him hum, ripping you from your memories. 

you look from his lips to his eyes watching you with lust, the beginnings of your nonsense words cut off when he kisses you. 

your heart flutters and stomach swoops immediately, kissing back with an embarrassing amount of fervor. he smirks against your lips as he pulls you on his lap, your arms circling around his shoulders.

his tongue traces your bottom lip before you feel it in your mouth, daringly meeting his back in a way you’d never done before. it causes him to bring his hands to your hips, squeezing and massaging them with his large hands. 

“look at you,” he mutters almost condescendingly, falling back onto his bed and causing you to squeal. you’re holding yourself above him and his eyebrow is quirked, red lips puffy and pink hair messy causing your heart to flutter mercilessly.

“if i didn’t know any better, baby, i’d think you’re real eager tonight.”

you bite down on your lip as you adjust yourself on him, your hips straddling his and brushing over him. your building heat is right under him and it takes everything in you not to moan at just the thought, his hands strong and firm.

and just as you’re about to answer, tell him that, yes, even though you’re not familiar with.... any of this, you’re eager and ready, your stomach growls and ruins the moment.

it causes a smile to light up his face, a deep chuckle leaving him before he flips you over. he’s hovering above you now, no parts of your bodies touching except for his hand a few inches away from your head. 

“or you’re hunger, my mistake, angel,” he says with a smirk, pressing a peck to your nose sweetly. “what do you want?”

you spend the next hour laying in his bed waiting for the pizza, the storm just as wild outside as it was when you were in the car. you bit down on a squeal threatening to leave your mouth every time there was a terrifying boom, your body shimming closer to yeonjun’s.

he smiled against your head and welcomed your body closer, bringing your head to his chest.

“you’re cute,” you hear him mumble, the swooping in your stomach causing you to feel warm.

you look up at him and smile shyly, tucking your head closer into his chest. you have to hide your growing smile when you feel his lips brush your head, deep content hums leaving his chest.

the doorbell ringing rips you two apart, his mumbled “i’ll be right back,’ causing you to sit up. you brush your fingers through your hair as you sit up, looking around his dark room and feeling something brewing in your stomach.

you feel every bit as nervous as you do excited and eager in his room with him right now. 

it’s still scary because you’re new to this. because you’ve never done anything like this before and you know you don’t know what you’re doing. 

but a part of you wants to kiss him on his bed. go further than he’s allowed you to because if he only didn’t want to be with you in the car, this should solve that problem, right?

you’ve never felt as desired and warm as you have with him these past months. no one’s ever looked at you the way he does or have made you feel the way he does. 

you’re usually too scared or uneasy to talk to people or form a connection; but from the moment you met him, you were able to do that. a part of you just felt inclined to help him, be a person that he knows would be there for him even if it meant in the form of helping him study or motivate him.

you never would’ve expected for him to reciprocate your feelings. nor would you have expected to be in this current situation, want and need bubbling in your stomach at the thought of yeonjun doing-

“pizza’s here,” yeonjun says, popping his head through the door holding a box of pizza. 

you smile upon seeing it, your stomach growling at the smell; if he hears it, he doesn’t say anything. just walks over and places the box on his bed, offering you a slice that you take immediately.

“thank you,” you squeak, bringing the food to your mouth.

he watches you for a few seconds, suddenly all too aware of him looking at you. you raise an eyebrow as you chew, a shy look coming over your face that causes him to smile. 

“what?”

“nothing,” he says, shaking his head as he takes out his own slice. “my mom called me and said they can’t come home tonight because of the storm.”

you take the time to chew your food as you take in his words, the fluttering in your stomach a mix of nerves and excitement. 

“oh.”

“yeah...” he hums, his eyes roaming your face; he doesn’t want his next suggestion to make you uncomfortable but he also thinks it would be best. for both of you. 

“and i don’t know if i should drive you home, angel. it’s supposed to get really bad. do you... wanna stay over?”

there’s a lump in your throat for all the reasons there shouldn’t be. 

not because this is your first time sleeping over a boy’s house or the fact that his parents aren’t home. or because you’re gonna have to call your mom and say you’re sleeping over a friend’s house.

or even because you don’t know what to expect tonight.

it’s only there because you know, in a new form of acting on your deeper desires and not suppressing yourself to just being some innocent girl, you wanna get railed.

“i... i guess i can do that,” you say, some nervousness still behind your voice because when it comes down to it, you’re unfamiliar with this situation. 

“well yeah, but do you want to, baby?” he asks with a small smirk, his hand reaching up to toy with your hair. 

his long fingers run through the strands before tucking them behind your ear, his hand slinking down to rest on your neck.

“if you don’t feel comfortable, i’ll take you home later,” he says, thumb running across your skin slowly. breath catches in your throat when he leans closer to you, his lingering scent and broadness causing you to bite down on your lip.

“i just thought it’d be nice to lay with you tonight. or wake up with you.”

“or let us go further since we’re not in the car.” 

you don’t know who’s more shocked by your words but you know you’re definitely more embarrassed, a rampant blush crossing your cheeks as you attempt to hide in his shoulder.

he’s quick to pull you away with a small “tsk,” the smirk on his lips quickly widening despite the soft look in his eyes. 

you bite back the noise threatening to leave your mouth when he wraps his hand around you hair, the slightest of stings ripping through your scalp when he pulls you forward.

“go further?” he asks lowly, his eyes peering down at you only making you feel more warm and flustered. 

words are caught in your mouth and you can’t find it in you to say anything. not only because you’re too embarrassed but you don’t even know what to say.

you know you want more than kissing and that there’s always a building pressure between your legs when he pulls you on his lap. 

you know on more than one occasion, you’ve wanted his hands that’d rest on your hips to go just a little further down. slip in the waistband of your pants and meet the wetness and heat through your underwear.

you’ve wanted to see his pink hair between your legs as you experience getting eaten out of the first time, holding back moans in the crease of your elbow as his tongue explores every inch of you. 

you know you want to look up at him with tears in your eyes and a heaving chest, ask if you can please suck him off because you’ve also never done that before. 

he can see the arousal and lust clouding your eyes the more the silence elapses, his cock quickly hardening as he takes in the sight of you on his bed ready for him to take you. 

it’s just a matter of how and when he’s gonna. how and when you tell him like the good girl he knows you are. 

“how much further are you thinking, angel?” his deep voice finally asks, successfully breaking the silence and building the thick tension. 

you let out a breathy exhale when he pushes you on your back, the knot in your stomach tightening as he looks down at your body. 

“what do you want me to do, huh?” he asks, the smirk and feeling in his chest growing when he sees you start to breathe heavily on his bed. your legs are nearly shaking from the build up in pressure, your tongue licking over your dry lips. 

“i... yeonjun...”

he bites back the groan threatening to leave his mouth at you moaning his name, holding himself above your body as he hand spays out against your stomach. 

“why are you moaning my name baby? i haven’t even done anything.”

“but... but i want you to. so bad.”

your voice is whiny and pathetic but it’s all it takes for him to snap, his hand moving from your stomach to between your legs. 

he can feel the heat and pulse of your pussy and has to suppress his own groan again, completely getting off on the feeling that you, the innocent little tutor he’s been wanting to ruin since he saw you last year, is laid out on his bed and dripping just for him. 

“please, yeonjun,” you whine again, completely out of your mind with lust when you feel his hand on you. 

he bites down on his lip before he starts gently running his hand over you, barely putting any pressure on you. he’s just relishing in the how only that makes you spread your legs immediately, hips bucking up closer to his hand. 

he pulls his hand away and pins your hips to the bed, his face hovering above yours before you can even whine again. 

“be patient, angel. or this isn’t gonna work,” he growls lowly, his thumbs running over your pants gently. 

“i- i’m sorry,” you gasp out, tears pricking your eyes because this feeling is so new and foreign and overwhelming. “i just... i’m so...”

“you’re so what?”

“i want you,” you say immediately, thinking back to your conversation with him outside of soobin’s house. when the words you’re telling him now are the same ones he told you. “i want you more than you know.”

a scoff leaves his mouth when you say that, remembering those words leaving his own mouth that night.

but the difference here is, he thinks, is that you really didn’t know that.

you didn’t know how just sitting there and smiling at him and talking to him so sweetly was making him want you. your soft smiles and vanilla scent and the wide-eyed look you’d always innocently give him.

but he’s aware of how much you want him, in this moment. he can feel it, smell it, see it. he knows just how much you want him because he wants you the same way. 

your pants and underwear are off in one shot, a gasp leaving your mouth when you realize you’re completely bare in front of him. 

he’s quick to look at your face to see if you’re okay, that teary wide-eyed look and teeth sinking in your lip greeting him; another whiney and mumbled “touch me,” leaves your mouth before he can ask.

a smile lights up his face that makes your heart jump even through this all, a teasing look in his eye even through the arousal and painful hardness in his pants.

“say please, angel.”

“please touch me, yeonjun. please.”

his fingers are on your clit right after the words leave you, your mouth hanging open and legs spreading when you’re immediately filed with a sense of some relief. 

“you’re so wet for me, angel. how long have you wanted this, huh?”

you babble out something you can’t even hear through your pounding ears but it must be something good and polite enough because you feel a finger enter you a few seconds later.

he hisses at the tightness around his finger and has to remember to be gentle with you, fingering you slowly and sweetly as he toys at your clit. 

“you’re doing so good, baby. so good for me.”

you cry out a moan that has his fingers moving quicker, curling them just right before you scream out his name; you’ve never ever felt anything like this before.

“yeonjun, oh, my god.”

“i know, baby, it’s okay,” he says, allowing his fingers to work over you and in you for a few seconds before he forces himself to remove them. your head shoots up and the sight almost makes him smile, a frustrated look in your teary eyes that has him cocking his head.

“why did you-”

the fingers just inside you are below your chin, the slickness of his fingers on your skin making you widen your eyes. is that... is he about to make you...

you hold back another moan when you watch him raise his fingers to his own mouth, his eyes rolling back when he tastes you. you don’t know if you’re a little grossed out or even more turned on but you think it must be the latter if the way your legs start to shake again and your lower stomach tightens. 

“you taste so fucking sweet, angel. can i eat your pussy?”

he could tell how scared you were when you first got here, not seeing a hint of that fear now but still needing to check before he pulls you on his face and has his way with you.

“y-yes, please, yeonjun, oh my-”

you can’t even get the words out before his hands are taking off your shirt, removing the straps of your bra and pushing them down until your boobs pop out. 

perky nipples spring into the air and he can’t stop the groan that leaves him, circling his tongue around each of them before he tells you to unhook it. your eyes meet his for just a few seconds before you reach out to take it off, quickly throwing it on the floor before you, without thinking, cover yourself. 

his eyes flash and he immediately snaps out of his trance, placing his hands on your arms but not attempting to move them. 

“what are you doing, angel?”

and it’s at this moment, something as silly as him seeing your chest completely naked, that you’re feeling insecure. 

you know he’s been with girls before this, college girls who definitely have bigger boobs than you and know what they’re doing. girls who are prettier and sexier and don’t blush or whine at the slightest hint of his touch of them. 

“i... i know you’ve been with prettier girls before. an-and i don’t think they’re that nice.”

“angel, i don’t know if i’ve gotten this across enough but you’re the most beautiful girl i’ve ever met,” he says, the sweetest words to ever leave his mouth not even making him blink.

because he needs you to know in this moment that you are. he can’t stand the insecure, fearful look in your eye that he’s not gonna find you desirable because you’re comparing yourself to other people. 

“that’s a lie,” you weakly mumble out, tears stinging your eyes because this is so stupid. now you’re ruining the moment and he’s not gonna wanna do this with you. you’re proving just how inexperienced and unfamiliar you are with-

“i don’t lie.”

your eyebrow raises and he can’t help but smirk, the realization that your whole relationship started off lying to your teacher making him let out a deep chuckle. 

“i mean i don’t lie to you, angel, i would never lie to you,” he says, reaching down to press a long kiss on your lips. it’s the most intimate kiss you’ve ever had with him, mouths parting on one another like you’re trying to get all your worries and reassurances out on one another.

him that you’re just as desirable as he knows you are and you that you really don’t know what you’re doing but you wanna do this with him. 

“you’re beautiful, baby, and if anyone’s not worthy of the other, it’s me.”

his words make your eyebrows pull together, the look in his eye one you’ve never seen before. probably the most vulnerable and honest you’ve seen him look at you. 

“but i’m gonna do my best to be, angel, so please... don’t think that,” he says, pulling your arms away from your chest. 

he feels relief flood through him when you allow him to do say, his head dipping again to place small pecks on your chest before taking another nipple in his mouth. 

he moans around you at the same time you do, throwing your head back against his pillow. your fingers lace through the back of his pink hair and you feel your pussy clenching around nothing, moaning out his name when his tongue carefully and slowly licks around the other neglected one. 

“you also have the sweetest pussy i’ve ever tasted,” he mumbles around your nipple, swirling his tongue around it one more time before grabbing your hips and throwing himself on his back. 

“so sit on my face, angel. now.”

you have no time to feel hesitant or insecure because, one, he pulls you up before you can do anything else and two, you’re far too eager to feel this for the first time. 

his tongue latching onto your clit causes you to moan out his name, trying your best to not buck your hips against his face. but his tongue feels like it’s everywhere, flicking at it your clit and up inside you and quickly making your legs shake around him. 

your hazy eyes look down and you see his own looking up at you, a hot arousal in them as you cover the rest of his face with your body. pink strands stick to his forehead and you bite down on your lip so you don’t scream, your eyes rolling back when he eats you out like a man starved.

he’s moaning against you and pulling you closer to his face, your hips bucking into his mouth as you whine out his name over and over. 

you’re so out of it and dazed with arousal and need that you don’t even think twice when an idea pops into your head. 

you buck your hips a tad harder than usual that he disconnects his mouth from you, about to ask if he hurt you somehow before you flip over on his face. your body leans over his stomach until your mouth is by the tight groin of his sweatpants, clumsily slipping down his boxers until his cock springs free.

it’s hard and red and looks completely neglected, screaming to be relieved by you.

so even though you have no idea what you’re doing, only guided by works of fiction and things you hear in the hallway, you wrap your mouth around the head of his cock.

you hear him growl at your name but only continue to suck him off, your tongue circling around him as your mouth moves up and down. you smile when he moans against your pussy just so moan around his a few seconds later, like he knew you were smiling against him at hearing that noise leave him.

he didn’t think he could get any harder than he already was but you continue to impress him and prove him wrong, his mouth working quicker on you to aid in his growing arousal. 

a loud moan of your name leaves his mouth when you deep throat him, a growled “fuck,” against your wetness that makes you whine against him. 

“i wanna fuck your mouth so badly,” he growls against you, wrapping his tongue around your clit just as you let out a strangled “please.” but he only shakes his head and continues his vigorous assault, sticking two fingers inside you that causes your scream to be muffled around his cock.

“you’re gonna come first, angel. i want you to come on my fucking face.”

and even though he already seemed to know it from the moment he met you, he sees that what he wants from you, he’s always gonna get. 

your lower stomach tightens before a feeling of euphoria consumes you, your legs shaking and hips bucking before an orgasm rips right through you. your head is leant against his head as you try to catch your breath, whining slightly when he pulls you off of him.

he lays you down gently on the bed before placing a kiss to your cheek. 

“you did so good, angel. how do you feel?”

“mmm.. that was the best thing i’ve ever felt.”

a deep laugh leaves him at your sleepy, dazed look, taking his shirt off so he can dab at your wet legs. you wince a little at the sensitivity and he mumbles an apology, laying on his back and opening his arms to you.

“lay with me, baby.”

a small smile crosses your face as you fall into his bare chest, sighing contently with your head resting over his chest. you can hear his heartbeat against your ear and feel his lips against your head, his fingers running over your arm slowly.

you’ve never been more comfortable and at ease than you are in this moment. even with the storm raging outside and the unknown parts of your relationship still coming, you feel happy. 

happy and safe and so stupidly content.  

“angel?”

you look up at him when you hear his voice break the silence, your chin against his chest as you meet his gaze. 

he smiles upon seeing you, his hand coming up to pat down your messy hair. 

“i like you. a lot.”

you bite down on your lip to hide your growing smile, daringly taking the first move to press a sweet peck on his lips.

“i like you, too. a lot, a lot,” you giggle out, the pink on your cheeks making his heart squeeze in his chest. “but i think you already knew that.”

“i was hoping,” he hums lowly, bringing you back into his chest. you smile against him as you inhale his scent, moving your body closer to him until you feel your leg hit a hard, fleshy piece of skin. 

your eyes widen and pulse quickens when you see he’s still hard and aching, the content look on his face completely disregarding it. 

“yeonjun...” you mumble, shamelessly staring at his dick a few inches from your leg. 

he peeks an eye open and sees you staring down at it, a sheepish smile crossing his face; he looks a tad embarrassed and you shouldn’t find it as endearing as you do. 

“sorry. it’ll go down eventually.”

eventually being when he gets up to go to the bathroom and jerks himself off. because there’s no way in hell he’s gonna go flaccid with you all naked and cuddled against him.

“you mean you’re not gonna fuck me?”

his eyes widen and cock twitches when those words leave your mouth, his hand falling to your jaw so you can look at him. his eyes roam your face when he sees the heavy desire building in your wide-eyed gaze, the perfect contrast of sweet and lustful that has him holding back a groan. 

“where did you learn to talk like this?” he hums lowly in your ear. 

you smirk against him before you bring your hand up to his mouth, his eyes searching yours. but you’re only staring back just as intensely, rubbing yourself against his leaking cock laying between you. 

“spit on it, please.”

he can’t even stop his groan from leaving him this time, painfully hard and ready to bust. you learned so fast what he likes and that’s when you’re both polite and eager.

“baby girl,” he moans, bringing his face down to place a messy, dominating kiss on yours. he pulls your mouths apart after allowing his tongue to explore your mouth, a string of spit connecting your lips. 

his eyes fall to your mouth before he’s tipping your head back, your hand clutching onto his shoulder and tightening when, suddenly, he spits in your mouth. 

your eyes widen but he smirks before you can say anything, wordlessly bringing your hand to his mouth and spitting on it as you so requested. you let out a shaky sigh, eyeing him warily before he gives you a nod.

it’s only then that you wrap your hand around his cock, watching as his eyes flutter shut and he leans his head back. 

“there u go, angel,” he hums lowly, your hand twisting over the tip before exploring down. 

he can feel your hesitance and unsureness but it only makes it that much more enjoyable for him, knowing this is the first time you’ve done this - although he does wonder how you knew to spit on it first. 

his words spur you on and you wet your hand again, twisting and turning on every ridge of his cock. his moans of your name cause wetness to gather between your legs, your eyes meeting his to see them right on you.

“please fuck me, yeonjun.”

you didn’t have to ask him twice before he pushed you on your back. he fumbled to take his sweatpants off fully, discarding them on the floor before pulling you toward the end of bed.

you look down at him with furrowed eyebrows before a loud gasp leaves you, his mouth back on your pussy before he slides two fingers in. he preps you again until you’re coming around him, his mouth hot around you while his fingers are curled and relentless.

“p-please, yeonjun. i wanna- feel you.”

“and you will, angel, i promise,” he says, pressing one last kiss to your swollen, wet clit before going up to your face. “you’ve never done this before, right?”

he knows it and you know it but he still needs to ask. needs to know he’s gonna be the first person to take you and ruin you. 

“no,” you immediately respond, shaking your head as tears well up in your eyes. 

he responds by smiling, placing one last long kiss on your mouth before cupping your face gently.

“it might hurt, okay? i’ll go as slow as you need.”

you nod your head as you relax on your back, looking down to see him positioning himself between your legs. he swirls the tip of his dick around your wet clit and opening, watching as your dripping hole tries to suck him in.

“holy fuck,” he growls out, “you’re so wet, baby. it’s gonna feel so fucking good.”

you whine unintelligible words but he knows to just soothe you. bring his hand to your waist and rub slowly as he promises to be in you soon.

the stretch at first in painful and unfamiliar, your face pulled into a grimace despite the deep groan leaving him.

“oh, angel,” he growls lowly, his dark eyes meeting yours to see your face twisted in pain. “are you okay? does it hurt?”

“y-yes, but it’s okay. just... slow,” you say quietly, nodding your head reassuringly. 

he hovers over your face as he inches himself in further and further, your breaths shaky and body tense as the pain worsens. 

“i’m sorry, baby, you’re doing so good.”

you nod your head and he kisses away the tears, a sigh of relief leaving you when he stops moving. he’s still inside you for a few seconds, allowing your tight walls to adjust around him before he starts moving.

it takes a few thrusts for the burning pain to subside, replaced by a full, warm feeling that had you moaning quietly into the air. 

“does it feel good now, baby?” you hear yeonjun ask, his thrusts speeding up as his body lays over you. “do you like my cock in you?”

“y-yes,” you mumble out, throwing your legs around his waist. 

he growls lowly as he starts fucking into you, keeping his pace steady and just hard enough to make you lose your mind; because he doesn’t wanna hurt you but you also feel so good, he can’t help but chase after his orgasm.

“tell me you’re mine.”

“i-i’m yours, yeonjun,” you whimper out, his hand coming down to your clit making you cry out again. “i’m yours. yours, yours, yours,” you repeat dumbly, having no sense of control over yourself as an immense pleasure builds inside you. 

he thrusts into you hitting a certain spot that has a scream leaving your mouth, a sadistic smirk on his face.

“that’s right, angel. you’re mine. you’ve been mine ever since i saw you last year,” he growls lowly, remembering the first time he saw you and knew you were gonna somehow effect him like this. 

“i wanted to ruin you then, baby, because i knew you’d be mine.”

“yeonjun,” you whine, thrusting your hips into him at his words. remembering all the times he caught you staring at him. all the times you’d watch him and thought about how handsome he was.

how someone like him would never want someone like you. 

but he wants you and you want him and it’s still something you can’t quite believe. you know you’re both different but it seems to be something that works, him bringing you out of your comfort zone and you making him wanna be someone better.

“i’m gonna come, angel,” he grunts out, “i’m gonna fucking come. come with me.”

you feel the knot in your stomach unravel before you’re both moaning each other’s names, chests heaving and his breathing harsh as he holds himself lazily above you. 

he drops his head into the crook of your neck, attempting to catch his breath despite the feeling of your post orgasm spazzing around him.

the pounding takes a few seconds to subside, a final moan leaving him before he pulls out of you. 

he’s quick to collapse onto his back, hanging his arm off the bed lazily as he searches for his shirt. 

he cleans you up a few moments later, watching you with a small smile before he pulls you down onto him again.

“how was that?” he mumbles quietly, his eyes closed and head resting atop yours. 

“really good,” you mumble back, your own eyes closed as you attempt to catch your breath. you still feel a little sticky but it’s not something you mind in this moment, your post orgasm daze leaving you content. 

it could be the post orgasm daze making you say the next words that leave your mouth. on such a high of emotions and endorphins and utter contentment that the warm feeling in your chest if confused.

or maybe it’s the months of getting to know the boy beside you who had such a bad reputation. who you were terrified of at first and thought was mean an scary, thought for sure he was gonna find you weird and nerdy.

but you’ve never felt more wanted or desired by another person. no one’s ever looked at you the way he’s looked at you before or made you feel the way he’s made you feel. 

“i... i think i love you, yeonjun.”

love had always scared yeonjun and especially hearing a confession like that after sex - it had always been his worst nightmare and, truthfully, an embarrassing moment.

but he’s never felt as listened to and comforted by someone else ever in his life before. someone who, from the second he met them, trusted him and thought of him to be good and smart and capable. 

he didn’t know why and he didn’t know what he did for you to think of him that way but he knows he’s never gonna take it for granted. because from the second he saw you, he really did know you were gonna be his.

“i think i might love you, too, angel.”