#(being that i could just die and no one would care for long)

[artinventor]

Ok let’s break it down shall we:

In season 4-5 I could already see the shipping potential with the concept of an angel pulling a faithless man out of hell, and said angel who is a robotic soldier suddenly starts to feel emotion after interacting more and more with said man.

Insane foundation already but I did think of how castiel seemed to already have a fascination with humanity after I saw his chat with uriel at the park where he tells dean that not only does he think all humans are works of art but that he already has doubts in heaven and in his absent father. Dean IS the one to inspire him to ultimately rebel and discover free will but I could excuse it as mainly a personal journey that you could certainly just say is a budding friendship. Setting aside the fact that they would constantly look at each other for long moments in a really charged way (for castiel I could say he’s a cosmic being that is unfamiliar with social norms or human emotion so staring intensely can be a byproduct of that but I don’t have an excuse for dean’s reactions to it, you can tell he wants to be threatened but my guy looked enraptured, if not ignited by it)

It wasn’t until season 6 and the episode The Man Who Would Be King that the “oh they’re so gay” hit me.

You’re telling me that this angel has been around for eons, witnessed the creation of everything on earth and observed it’s many big events, but did not start to feel emotion or act out until he met dean?? And he champions dean’s mission of free will even when he doesn’t fully understand it himself when the other angels ask him. I can say this is still apart of his personal journey but at this point I cannot deny that dean is the one that really spearheaded it forward. He starts a whole war in heaven so that he can maintain dean’s mission and so that his sacrifice (his brother) was not for nothing. The fact that cas’ bad decisions were all based on the fact that he just didn’t want Dean to be involved because he was finally retired and at peace so he had no one else to turn to except crowley. He really cares about dean’s happiness THAT much, that is a mighty intense feeling to have for someone to me.

Then they emphasize the fact that dean is the one who feels the most betrayed by cas after struggling to even accept it in the first place. There’s a lot of intensity within the dialogue in the scene they confront him about it, and they’re sure to give me a close up on only dean to make sure I know how he feels about it. The eye contact in that scene really goes crazy because there was so much there on a deeper level, It was like you could see how they both realized the betrayal was breaking the trust between them but they were still wanting to hang on to that connection because it was something they both cherished, the way dean looked back before leaving? Insane.

That episode was the main hit for me, but it was largely mainly on castiel’s end. The main hit from dean’s end for me was when I saw the purgatory flashbacks in season 8.

In season 7 it seemed to me that dean was very effected by cas’ death and handled it in the classic dean winchester way of internalizing it all, but we get lines here and there about how bothered he is by it whenever his concerning behavior is somewhat addressed. Before Cas even had a chance to redeem himself after what he did, Dean seems to have already forgiven him, defending him once cas re-gains his lost memory and says he deserved to die. This showed me that the connection they had meant as much to dean as it did to cas.

And he really shows how much it means to him with how he fights tooth and nail to get cas out of purgatory. Cas literally disappeared once they got there, making it look like he abandoned dean, and then actively ran away from dean because he thought he belonged there. Yet dean was so insane that he hunted down cas’ location, caught up with him and dragged him to that portal. He literally had a way out that he chose to ignore until he found castiel, and was willing to die to get him out. Dean very desperately wants cas to be around when he gets out, he did not like how it felt when he previously wasn’t. Again, that is a mighty intense feeling to have for someone to me. Especially with how his memory literally changed what happened because he couldn’t handle that cas was left behind??

I do think a big part of this storyline is showing how dean thinks everything and everyone is his responsibility because of the way he was raised by his father as a hunter and protector. But we’ve seen this in dean since the beginning, while not fully addressed until now, it’s not new, so the fact that they used castiel to further show this side of him is very insane. Leaving Cas in purgatory would effect nobody on the outside except Dean, Dean made it his personal mission to get that angel out even after everything he had done, and that level of intensity was another major hit on the Destiel train for me. That and the gay ass reaction dean had when cas walked out of the bathroom when he got back from purgatory???

anyway, I’m only on episode 8 of season 8 rn so that’s all I’ve seen so far.

y’all I am so sorry for years I assumed that gay ship in supernatural was just a delusion that people overanalyzed and claimed queerbait for no reason cuz I’ve seen that happen a million times but now that I’m actually watching the show they really were gay as fuck LMAOOOO

[natsuminmin]

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆ 500 MILLION HOURS -> ushijima wakatoshi !!!

ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 .ᐟ NOW PLAYING . . . alexandra by reality club

synopsis; in which ushijima slowly realizes he's grown fond of the unexpected, as long as it was in the shape of you cw: fluff/slight angst (?), yearning obvi , ushi doesnt what to make of his feelings , pre!timeskip, unproofread + lowercase, can be interpreted as gn! , self-indulgent , ooc grr... (lmk if i forget something!!!)

"on a park bench, under the moon"

ushijima shouldn't have cared that much.

it was just a hug...right? it didn't mean anything?

enough, he wont torture himself with this. human emotions weren't exactly his strongest suit. he should just stick to volleyball.

but why did he feel his heart race when he looked down at you, with your arms wrapped around him? you who he towered over so easily? one look in your eyes and he found it hard to fight his irrational urge to pick you up and cradle you close to his body. excuse me...where did that even come from?

he cleared his throat to clear his mind, his gravelly voice filling the air.

"you're being clingy right now." yep, that was ushijima. blunt and concise as always. he saw you pull away with a huff, and he couldn't help but feel a pang of regret, maybe. he couldn't tell, all he knew was that he might've wanted your embrace around him for a second longer. his thoughts stopped swirling when you cut through it with your voice, something he always compared to the melodic tunes of a windchime, even as you used it to get sarcastic with him. he never did really get your humor.

"well, you should be used to it. we've been friends for forever."

"it's only been 5 years. besides, we'd both die before we become 'friends for forever.'"

you groaned at him with indignation, did he always have to take things so literally? it was only an exaggeration....you resumed your earlier pace, returning into a stride as you remembered why you were out so late at night anyway.

popsicles were far too good...it was a hot midnight and you craved some after being woken up to a dream of it. naturally, you texted him first. and here you were, sneaking out of the dorms as the both of you walked to the convenience store. you don't know how you managed to convince him to go with you. you didn't even notice how quickly his reply had sent, as if he was waiting for hours to hear from you.

just as you began to retort, he suddenly spoke and clashed with your own words:

"well-"

"you've never hugged me this much."

you cut yourself off to let him finish speaking. the both of you walk in the tranquility of night for a second, as if trying to let that awkward moment float away in the soft breeze.

what? why were you looking at him in that way? he was just being honest....you know he's always been blunt. you wouldn't judge him, would you? he was relieved when you broke the silence, letting out a soft breath. why was he so worried if he weirded you out? it's not like he expected you to run back to your dorm and leave him alone with a broken heart. nope, not at all.

"is it a crime to want to hug a friend? brighten up sometimes, ushi."

before he could say that he was not a flashlight therefore he could not brighten up, and that it was never a crime to touch someone unless it was to an extreme, you shushed him; as if you almost knew what he was going to say already. which you probably did...god, why did that make his heart squeeze?

"a-ba-bah-bah, don't say anything. let's just buy the popsicles.

─── ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ ───

he found himself sitting at a park bench beside you, who was noisily slurping up the popsicles you had purchased and was obviously annoyed that it had melted that quickly. well, that's what popsicles usually did in the heat, after all

your beauty was simply divine, even when you were making the silliest faces as you tried to catch the juice that dripped down the popsicle stick. he thought you could rival even the goddess' when he saw the moonlight bounce off your eyes, making it sparkle more so than it usually did.

he noticed that you downed both of the popsicles immediately, leaving you with two plain sticks. he watched you stare at them for a while, before tucking it under your lips to create makeshift fangs.

"i'm dracula, bleh bleh blegh"

then you doubled over laughing at the joke (?) you made, he presumed. he was not getting any better at this.

he doesn't understand you.

he hates it. hates not knowing what you'll do next.

strangely enough, it's what draws him to you. he wants to analyze you. he wants to laugh at your jokes. he wants to know how you wanted to be loved. he wants to learn every single nook and cranny that created the outline of you.

he's aware volleyball was all he's ever mastered.

but you....you make him feel emotions that he didn't know he was possible of feeling. like he could dive in choppy waters and remain unscathed. heck, he felt cocky enough to puff up his chest and say those three special words already.

my god, if he can't focus on the only thing he knows, then what was he?

oh no.

he. was. a. fool.

for you, no less.

he so badly wanted to risk your friendship and confess at that very moment, yearned to finally grasp you in his arms the way you did.

no, screw that. he wouldn't know what to do.

so he resolved to wait instead. to wait until you made the first move. to wait until you had shown reassurance that you longed for him as much as he did for you.

if only he knew what was running in your mind as you chewed absent-mindedly on your popsicle stick, then he'd know that his feelings weren't unrequited after all. all you were thinking about was your next move, you had to make it bigger and bolder, because he just wouldn't get it otherwise. the signs were all there, she , ushijima. it's a shame, really.

but whatever, he's decided that he'd spend 500 million hours waiting, dedicate all his minutes to you; in hopes that you would finally find your way to your rightful place:

by his side.

"but in full view of what you are, you’re a goddess, you’re my rock star"

a/n: hahehuhiho i love basing my fics on songs sm. i remember yapping to my friend about creating this fic and said i should go for it...uu have her to thank gyus UGHH I CANT GET OVER HIM I WANNA MAKE MORE FICS WITH THIS KIND OF USHI should i make this into a 3-part fic that ends in total angst

[acuteobserv4tion]

Idea for a future Shadow, Amy, and Rouge movie/mini series/ TV special that would take place after the 4th movie.

Spoilers: You know the drill

They combine the Team Dark plotline from Sonic Heroes with the Black Doom stuff from the Shadow the Hedgehog game.

I think we all know an amnesia plotline would be pointless in the movies. So instead, how about they finally introduce Rouge. We can't have her working for GUN in her debut since they just keep leaving a stink on the Sonic cinematic universe.

Amy finds Shadow, and she drags him around, kind of like she did to Silver. We dont know where Shadow landed. She reminds him of Maria, and he takes Sonic's advice about new love and finding family to heart. Just taking the natural route for their dynamic that Sega refused to expand on.

He follows her, mostly quiet, mostly observing. Amy engages with him. Just full of energy, being herself. Not a one to one of Maria, but more casual. Amy is just enjoying the world. A world Shadow never got to experience.

And Amy takes care of Shadow, holding his hand, answering his call. She doesn't even know she's doing it. That's just who she is. Shadow occasionally recoils from the light coming off her. Maria's light. The story would be about that connection and helping Shadow adjust.

Rouge gets introduced as someone drawn to the explosion of chaos energy in space like Knuckles and Tails were. My original thought was that she was searching for the Master Emerald, too. But that might have to change.

There was no Space Colony Ark. So, how would Gerald and Black Doom have communicated without a fuss? Maybe Black Doom had an envoy?

Perhaps Rouge's people could be servants traveling across the Galaxy under orders. Minor scouts. Expendable. Only given minimal information for their tasks. But Rouge is a sneaky creature, lasting this long due to cunning and gathering info.

When Gerald's Eclipse Cannon goes off, the Black Arms recognize the energy as their creation. They send Rouge to check it out. Rouge would be the B plot. Keeping track of her progress with Amy and Shadow in the background.

She arrives at the military base. Finds it empty. She doesn't pay mind to the wreckage like Sonic would. She goes through the tunnels.

Back to Amy and Shadow: Eventually, as they traveled the world together (with Shadows' underlying angst), Shadow tells Amy that he needs to get/do something. Something important. Something he didn't think he would need to before. (After all, the plan was for everyone to die, including him and Gerald)

Amy being Amy says she'll go with him. If he'll let her. She knows he's not telling her everything. But she's willing to wait.

When they get to the base, Amy sticks by his side, looking around, because this was his home. Shadow is still pained. Maybe he tells Amy that he had a friend here.

Rouge's presence is made known. This infuriates Shadow like it did when Sonic, Knuckles, and Tails intruded. Like a tormented ghost haunting a grave site. His energy starts bouncing off him, and Rouge recognizes it from what she saw when receiving her mission.

Rouge is caught. So, of course, Rouge blends in, like she always has. She engages with Shadow and Amy.

She plays herself off as a treasure hunter/explorer. Someone searching for rare artifacts and specimens, but was drawn in by the massive energy beam that came from this planet a while back. Saying she came to learn what it was.

Of course, Shadow is hesitant to say anything about that to either of the girls. Though Rouge already suspects that he's the result of Black Arms DNA.

They explore past the tunnels. I believe they would find a robot friend down there. A seemingly unfinished thing that reminds Amy of the metal hedgehogs she fought before. Only closer in design to the egg bots. Almost like a prototype, but not quite.

Shadow knows what it is. Another Gerald Robotnik discovery. (Opens up a future for Gamma and Omega after the Metal Sonic stuff. Personally, I think Gamma)

Maybe they come across the Biolizard down there. Dead or barely alive. Resting, possibly. Or Shadow simply has a flashback of the Biolizard hanging on to life, that he wasn't the only one confined to this place. Possible Shadow feelings on his predecessors?

Rouge is smoothly digging through old Project Shadow files the whole journey, but still being, well, Rouge.

Amy is unsure about the bat. Maybe even confronts Rouge at one point, saying that if this goes bad for him or Shadow is hurt in any way, she'll have to answer to Amy Rose. Protective of this quiet, overwhelmed boy that she found.

Of course, Rouge isn't nearly as repentant(yet) on the other side of Amy's little confrontation

We keep searching. Shadow learns about and recognizes the horrors of Gerald's experiments. What it may have taken to complete him. He doubts his own purpose. Emotional support hedgehog Amy Rose works to put a stop to that.

We only saw his eyes surrounded by rock, and he said he had no memories beyond earth.

We learn about the Black Arms. Why even the doctors looked at Shadow the way they did. Maybe Shadow wasn't fully formed when he crashed on earth. Why? Where did he come from? What did he come from?

Rouge is suave while she guides them in the direction of Shadow's past. Amy tells him he doesn't need to do this if he's not ready. Shadow has no idea where he came from, how he got here.

Well, now is his chance to know.

So, they go run across the world using Rouge's rings. The current GUN doesn't have the answers. They search through Walter's old stuff.

And that's how Shadow would learn about Black Doom. What deal was it that Gerald made.

Maria didn't seem to be sick in the movie, and there was no indication whatsoever that Shadow was ever going to be used for cures or medicine. The only thing we know is that they were obsessed with his energy.

What is Rouge's Endgame? Is she supposed to bring Shadow back with her? Is she meant to trigger something? Is there a beacon? Are the Black Arms coming here?

So yeah, that's my theory.

Hopefully, Shadow will be with his girls at some point, having an arc.

[free-fart-avenue]

But they also know who he is.

At the end they hear about how he's from "another dimention" and want to know more, what if he meets with Sans briefly and asks if they should share Everything, Most things, or just make things up, then Papyrus and/or Frisk come over and remind them the hell they (almost entirely Geno) went through to just learn the lession that

They can depend on and tell their friends things. They don't have to lie about who Geno is because that would For Sure lead to more isolation.

Maybe Papyrus and Frisk don't even need to be there. Geno and Sans are both very smart and know that their friends, with being so strong already and now having a happy ending, could handle knowing that Geno was Sans. They both talk and figure that, nah, lying and hiding things is how they got here. How Geno got here, existed in the first place.

It could go either way, and would be up to whoever makes this into an actual thing if they do.

The others would have issues though. But maybe Geno's voice is more hoarse? Can you imagine how much he might have cried over.. everything? Watching his family and friends die, not being able to do anything, but he could probably deal with that, he knew something like that would happen long ago. But with how much he tried to convince himself just to be abandoned when his only hope of ending the pain gets taken from him again and again and Again.

Torriel would know Sans and Geno apart the best, Geno sounds sadder, but he puts more effort into talking then Sans does. Geno's voice is more tense.

Once the others all learn about and accept the fact that Sans and Geno were the same person, they can help show Geno how he is an individual, and one who lost all he cared about, just to get it replaced with copies.

Undyne keeps looking at him, he is quieter and he thinks maybe she is trying to see how they are the same, or how they're different, but then one day she approaches and tells him her thoughts.

She couldn't imagine losing all her friends, she'd make sure that'd never happen. But right in front of her, Sans did let that happen, but got everything back by going through hell. She probably doesn't think it was all bad that Geno went through the hell he did because that was what it took for her best friend's brother to actually open up to those around him.

I can keep going with just Undyne's pov, but this is about Geno.

With him trying harder to be open to his friends, he can confide his guilt and shame into them, he can tell them how he feels and what he thinks and they can help.

He probably would spend time with his aquentences more, but if he is able to grieve the loss of his world, his family and friends, and even his own identity, all with the support of his friends and brothers, then it could be a healthy change, one because he is a different person from Sans, and he can have different.

Maybe he gets closer to them first and they help him work through his pain, that seems more likely.

They all have a lot to work through, and I can keep going, but this is getting long and I'm getting tired, so I'll make less sense and say dumb stuff.

do you think geno post-aftertale gets guilty for "replacing" his papyrus with the current one (and by extension everyone else). like yeah there's A papyrus here and he's his brother along with sans but he's still wearing the scarf of his papyrus.

the papyrus he failed to protect.

and like sure since the timeline reset technically the current papyrus IS his papyrus but both geno and sans being here could probably mess with him.

he knows he's here because of determination but maybe sometimes he can't help but look at the scarf he's wearing and papyrus and feel an immense sense of guilt

that's not to mention how everyone will think of him as a stranger. can you imagine they're all hanging out and then undyne tells geno something that sans did. but he already knows that because he did that but that's weird to say. "oh yeah i remember that i did that." they dont know that, you're not their sans.

does toriel sometimes get unsettled by how sans and geno's voice sounds the exact same. how often would she mistake the two at first when they're talking out of sight. how often do they get mistaken in general? and when they do get mistaken do people always assume it's sans and never geno?

like yeah aftertale had a happy ending but there's still so much to explore after it. how does geno adjust to being in the real world again (and on the surface at that). how does geno deal with his identity. does he keep his name? does he explain who exactly he is to the others or does he let that go unspoken? does he sometimes look at sans and get jealous he didn't have to go through everything that he did to get this happy ending and then feel bad for getting jealous?

i think it would be nice for geno to hang out with people that are less familiar with sans but still people he knows, like asgore, mettaton, napstablook, etc. there'd be less of that "i know sans well but you're almost like a stranger". it's simpler with acquaintances because they simply don't know either of them well enough. so geno doesn't have to be worried about being compared all the time, consciously or not

[theceaselessidiot]

Eloise Bridgerton being an absolute mood:

and Cressida's reaction of 'this girl is so weird, but I'm into it??? Wait am I into this??'':

[iliveinprocrasti-nationn]

fauci saying “vulnerable people will fall by the wayside” and that some will die but that’s ok because we’re not going to see the “tsunami of cases” we’ve seen before is so dehumanising. so babies with no immune system, elderly people, disabled people, and people without adequate access to healthcare can all die of covid. but it’s ok guys because actually they’re just falling to the wayside and everyone else will go back to normal and be fine (sarcasm).

my death or the deaths of my family or friends wouldn’t be us “falling by the wayside”, it would be us being failed by our government, healthcare systems, and communities who have refused to take coronavirus seriously despite mounting anecdotal and scientific evidence of the harm this virus does. fact that people can accept the deaths of vulnerable groups just because they want to eat in a restaurant or don’t want to wear a mask is horrifying

[summertimesadnessirl]

You don't get it.

If I recover, that means it doesn't matter that someone murdered me and left my body alive.

I have to die because otherwise no one will ever care that someone raped me to death.

It took 15 minutes.

It took 3 years.

It took a lifetime.

If there is a god, any gods, all gods, I want them, all of them raped to death because this happened.

[eievuimultimuse]

     SUPERFLY CONTINUES TO quietly listen as Xever proceeds onwards with his explanation. ‘The world is a cesspool,’ indeed. Seems even for a former human as himself, Xever still understands just how much this world takes from people like them. How uncaring it could be. It took away someone very important to him, and even if he did still have people, it left him in a position of taking care of others and protecting them when he had needed that himself  ( not that he would ever admit to such a thing ). It does admittedly ease his mind to know that they have a mutual understanding of that much.

     Red hues reflect the bright lights as they drive past them, dimmed only by his brows continuing to knit together while Xever delves into the condition of his most recent form. He supposes he could understand the initial disdain he had for becoming a fish. Frankly, had Xever not specified that he prefers being this way now, Superfly would’ve assumed that he hated it the same way humans seemed to hate mutants. After all, he could understand how perhaps being a fish was as undesirable as being a fly  ( he’d admit, it crossed his mind to wonder how much their Stockman enjoyed being one. But he’s trying not to think about it, because the thought of his father being a fly like him feels…WRONG, confessedly ).

     Even without pupils, the slight movement of his head indicated that his gaze shifted to the air tank when the fish mutant confessed that he would DIE without it. A shiver involuntarily went down the fly’s spine at such a cruel thought. And his mind wanders to his own aquatic sibling, and he has to shake it lest he feel ill.  “ That sounds awful, “  he says bluntly. Maybe Xever’s gotten used to it and doesn’t care, but even for someone like Superfly who had to do a lot to survive, it just sounds…unfortunate. But the statement applies to everything else he’s said too, especially the notion of having no autonomy over one’s own life.

     “ My dad had fought t’ keep us from bein’ controlled and caged. It cost him his life. So I’m sure you can imagine just how much I despise the idea. “  It’d be no different than if the man had died for nothing, as far as he was concerned. The fly hesitates to share details about himself, but considering how much Xever decided to tell him just now, it only seemed right to return the favour.

“ Humans took his life. Turned on one of their own just ‘cause he was the only one who gave a damn about us. Then fourteen years later, some humans tried t’ kill me and my siblings. I nearly beat one of ‘em t’ death just to protect ‘em. “And myself, he decides not to add. He doesn’t like talking about what happened when he put himself between his family and that man, what happened when he caught up to him with his bat. It made Superfly feel small and he HATED that.  “ After that, I realized life was never gonna be safe so long as humans were around. I still think that. My folks…wound up disagreeing for reasons I couldn’t freakin’ begin t’ tell you. After everything I did to protect them, they just…TURNED ON me in favour of the same people that hurt us. All ‘cause those turtles got it in their heads that humans are all that.Ridiculous. “

"Oh trust me you and I agree with that. Unlike you I never had anyone. I was alone my whole life, my parents threw me away like trash when I was still a kid. I had to struggle to survive completly on my own, with no one there to save me. This world is a cesspool and I hate it for what it did to me. And I hated it even more when I someone who was able to survive on my own became an invalid who was beholden to people who didn't care if I lived or died."

They turned a corner, more bright lights shooting past the pair. Xever felt he had to tell this story since he wanted to be honest for once. This guy had been dealt a hard hand too, so did Xever long to connect to him on some level? Did him being alone all the time cause it?

"I did hate what I became for a while. I mean, I was a landwalker who suddenly became a fish out of nowhere because of someone else's dumb choice. I was trapped in a tank for ages as they worked on the tech I have now. But, once that tech was made I was basically a puppet on strings which they could cut at any time they wanted. My life wasn't my own anymore and I had to just accept that."

Xever had a feeling Fly had some beef with humanity I mean most would they were a disgusting species who brought a lot of harm to the world around them. Xever never thought much of it though, he was never a big picture guy because survival was what he tended to focus on. And taking from others was how he had survived.

"I am so glad to be free, and I grew to accept what I am. Being a fish wasn't the problem it never was. It was the humans who sought to use that form against me to use it as a means to control me. I can't breathe air, in fact you could kill me right now if you destroyed my tank. I can't live without it or my legs. I am always one step away from death. So why not live upon that edge? That became my life."

[tenwhiteandalusians]

and then no one said anything about the fact that if i watched ONE MORE episode tenax pulls a "i'm not angry i'm just disappointed i'm hurt" about scorpus signing with the white faction.

[kalgalen]

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[fragglerockopinions]

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[nazghcul]

FOR ONCE someone cared, not that he didn't have his broski and friends supporting him when it came to his music career, it felt better knowing Benny became so passionate about his music. His heart did that little dance in his chest that was felt all the way down the pit of his stomach. "Thanks for the interest babe, didn't expect you to be so supporting or even passionate about my songs. With all these copy and past versions, i feel like people mostly listen and not appreciate or give credit. Maybe i'm being a bit petty, but that shit irks me. I'm no one sticking my nose into other people's musical choices or how they take their career you know. But, of course i'll break down the subliminal messages and translate the wording for you. Italian is no different than spanish but i know you'll get certain phrases however, i'll translate any you don't fully understand." He smiled at his boyfriend. "I will say that i don't like that guy, as long as you play his songs while i'm present, we're good or else i'll be all types of grump." There was no denying Ludo had anger issues more so when this italian copy version Benny mentioned popped up in their conversation. Thankfully that guy was now a switched up topic. For the better.

"I've never messed around anyone outside my age range. I don't know what's the appeal there, fucking around with old people isn't right, i see them as my parents or grandparents. And i see why you dated outside your age, no hate. It was never my thing. Sorry you had to go through that, as always your father keep sticking his nose. He tried with me, and here we are." Ludovic never feared anything, not even death but he did fear not having Benny part of his life anymore. Crazy how he ended up changing for someone when he never thought that would be possible. Benny flipped the world upside down for him, all it took was one kiss to set him free. "Hope you can trust me. It's okay if that's hard for you now but, hopefully i can change that for you." Ludo whispered softly, kissing the other again. Only Benny could ever set him free, giving up on him for whatever dumb reason would be idiotic in itself. His tongue slipped between Benny's soft pillowed yet warm lips. When the kiss broke, hazel hues locked with Benny's blue ocean like ones, smiling at him.

"The ocean is like hell, dense, lonely, dark. Beautiful to marvel at, yet deadly. I guess for you, i can see why you choose it. it's less painful than a plan crash, i assume you'll feel the pain there compared to the ocean, you are more than likely to feel like another sleepy night. Just that you won't wake up. Well, given your tan skin, and how the ocean seems to call you. You are one hell of a sexy merman, take me with you. On the ship and boat, die a slow death in your arms." This was a deep conversation however, Ludo was being serious. If anything, he wanted death to be nice and take him with Benny. As they headed into this shop, Ludo had seen this nice silver pendant in the shape of an ocean which also had initials, lucky he saw one with and L. Guiding his boyfriend to the spot where he saw the necklace, taking it out from where it hung, showing Benny after. "Saw this, and luckily they have one with a B."

Visibly,   Benji   pursed   his   lips   into   a   pout.   He   hated   knowing   that   Ludovic   wrote   songs   for   him   and   Benji   had   been   unaware   of   it.   Why   didn't   he   listen   to   those   rumors?   Because   mostly   rumors   like   that   were   just   bullshit.   ❝I'll   listen   to   all   of   them   from   now   on,   and   ask   you   frequently   when   I   don't   understand   something.   Luckily,   Italian   and   Spanish   are   similar.❞   If   Benji   was   honest   he   had   to   admit   that   he   couldn't   wait   to   know   everything   Ludovic   kept   hidden   in   his   songs.   But   listening   to   all   of   those   had   to   wait   until   much   later.   Back   at   his   personal   prison   with   his   father,   Benji   would   have   enough   time   to   listen   to   all   songs.   Right   now,   he   rather   enjoyed   the   free   and   carefree   time   he   could   spend   with   his   new   boyfriend.

❝Yeah,   I   really   thought   that   at   first.   Two   or   three   years   before   I   met   you,   I   dated   someone   my   age   briefly.   If   you   can   call   it   dating.   But   turned   out,   he   said   that   he's   never   been   interested   in   me.   Richard   paid   him   for   leaving   me.   This   made   me   stop   trusting   guys   my   age.❞   But   with   Ludovic   it   was   definitely   different   and   Benji   understood   that   now.   Yet,   he   also   had   no   doubts   that   his   boyfriend   could   get   everyone   to   spread   their   legs   for   him.   Was   this   triggering   his   jealousy?   Yes,   secretly,   Benji   felt   the   little   green   monster   of   jealousy   creeping   up   again.   He   didn't   even   want   to   imagine   how   everyone   was   swooning   over   Ludovic.   And   sadly,   Benji   was   already   well   aware   that   they'll   run   into   a   bunch   of   ex-flings   sooner   or   later.   Will   Benji's   jealousy   endure   that?   Probably   not.   Benji   could   already   tell   that   he'll   start   an   argument   when   it'll   become   too   much.   Luckily,   the   kiss   distracted   his   mind   right   away   from   unnecessary   overthinking.   All   he   wanted   was   to   enjoy   their   date   for   as   long   as   it   lasts.   Sooner   or   later,   they   will   both   lose   their   patience   and   crave   each   other   again.   Benji   could   already   feel   that   his   body   was   growing   impatient.   Ludo   was   just   too   handsome   and   his   kisses   were   pure   sin.   The   only   way   to   distract   himself   was   to   keep   moving   while   holding   a   nice   conversation.   His   mind   shouldn't   go   anywhere   sinful,   not   yet   at   least.

Benji   hummed   and   nodded,   not   surprised   at   all   that   Ludovic   considered   both   scary.   It   was   the   most   rational   answer.   ❝It's   mainly   a   question   of...which   death   do   you   think   you   could   deal   with   a   little   better.   Most   people   will   probably   choose   death   by   plane   crash   because   they   hope   it'll   be   faster?❞   Benji   shrugged   a   little   bit.   ❝But   if   I'd   have   to   choose,   I'd   choose   the   ocean   and   the   ship.   Drowning   is   torture,   that's   true,   but   having   the   ocean   as   your   grave   sounds   nice   to   me.❞   A   bright   smile   settled   on   Benji's   lips.   ❝That   was   a   downer,   I'm   sorry.   It   didn't   mean   to   be   one,   I   just   love   the   ocean   a   lot.❞   He   chuckled   and   followed   his   boyfriend's   gaze   over   to   the   shops.   Immediately,   his   blue   eyes   flickered.   ❝Don't   mind   actually.   What   did   you   see?❞   he   asked   as   he   moved   closer   to   the   small   shop   Ludovic   mentioned.

[steviescrystals]

there is no feeling worse in the world than missing your grandma :/

[mrmathmanwr]

okay, tbf, tbf, i gotta defend my dudes here. Inuyasha not only went back to Kikyo due to an INSANE amount of guilt he felt for more or less (in his mind) CAUSING HER DEATH, and wanting to reconcile and console (hope thats the right spelling) her, but also because she was already dead, and he cared too much for Kagome to see her hurt. He wanted to help Kikyo get revenge, and she was already dead as well, so maybe if she died, she’d find solace instead. 

I RANTED SO HARD, PLEASE FORGIVE ME.

Kikyo came back hating him, and as we saw in the flashback around chapter 47-ish iirc (one where he is telling the story of him and kikyo's relationship to Kaede) he probably would've felt horrible about this. When he offended Kikyo by saying "I'm not like you." He immediately followed it up by the line "Her face... It looked so utterly alone.... And for the first time in my life, I felt I had done something wrong." Now imagine this reaction, but instead of loneliness, it is sheer hatred. Wishing for nothing but to see you dead. This woman, your only solace in this world, the only person who doesn't see you as a monster, wishing for your death. Imagine that. 

now, going beyond that, he also wishes for this to never happen again to Kikyo, which I think is fair. The entirety of chapter 173 is dedicated to Inuyasha just saying “I don’t wanna see Kikyo have her life fucked over by Narkau again.” and his guilt is shown massively here too, or at very least it is in a line he says. “If he attacks you again… Who will protect you? I’m the only one you have!” He legit is saying “I would feel sole responsible if you died trying to kill Naraku.” He’s already failed her once, and he cannot STAND the thought of it happening twice.

That last part also loops back around to why he doesn’t want Kagome to be around while he’s still dealing with Kikyo, not only because he feels like shit for doing this to her, but also because, as Inuyasha said, he can’t afford her love. Not when love killed Kikyo. (GOD I FUCKING LOVE CHAPTER 176 AWORJAWIRJ) Literally, as he said, “I have to protect her, I have to give my life to Kikyo.” THEN, AS KAGOME HERSELF SAID TO IMMEDIATELY FOLLOW UP, “I know, I can’t compete against Kikyo. Because I’m… I’m still alive.” OMGOEJRAWIORJWAR. I say this with love, not malice, please, read chapter 176 of the manga. If you want, I can provide a link to it, but it alone I think perfectly encapsulates their relationship up to that point. (i am only on the early half of book 7, so I can’t say anything for beyond it.)

And I know you didn’t say this, but he always loved Kagome too. I feel like I really don’t need to explain, but there are SEVERAL occasions in the series where Inuyasha and Kagome only defeat the big bad evil trying to kill the because of their love for eachother. It could be argued that Inuyasha only killed the Thunder Brothers BECAUSE he loved Kagome, and seeing them die sent him into a blind rage, not to mention his reaction when he thought they died because of the thunder blast. The first time he unlocked his demon form was pretty much entirely because Kagome was about to be killed. I could go on but this rant is too fucking long and I am actively not eating tacos because of it.

LASTLY, just as a tiny footnote, I can’t entirely blame him for being salty over Koga. Koga tries to kill him and the gang, steals his girl (literally), puts her in IMMENSE DANGER (as stated previously, his biggest fear,) and then she seems flattered? Not to mention the other times he is constantly gawking over Kagome while FAILING TO PROTECT HER? All he sees him as is a danger to Kagome. still love my boy though, koga fucking rules.

And I am sorry if this whole rant seems angry, it’s not, my brain just wouldn’t let me not write this. Inuyasha’s guilt over Kikyo is something I find so fucking fascinating, and I couldn’t just let this fester and rot in my brain. It was like a tumor, pushing on my skull to get out. anyways i fucking love my dudes, and I hope this makes you love them a little bit more.

Kagome is so strong because I would lose my shit if I was nice to a guy and my crush were to start being jealous and angry and then he turns around and is still all over his former love.

[tojbnuy]

by popular demand and since i hit 1k! here’s a part 2 💞 find part one here! art by @ _3aem on twt!!

bestfriend!satoru who always takes you on late night drives if you’re feeling upset. he’ll buy you something sweet and when he drops you back home he’ll always leave you with a little kiss. he doesn’t want his favourite girl being sad.

bestfriend!satoru who absolutely adores the way you smell. everytime he’s near you in class he places his hands out for some of your hand cream and he sits there sniffing his hands afterwards.

bestfriend!satoru who will always suggest a horror movie when it’s movie night with your friends. he knows it’s only a matter of time before you’re freaking out and you’ll climb into his lap. ‘sshhh you’re okay baby i’ve got you’ and while you’re distracted his hands will find their way under your top and start stroking your back and tummy.

bestfriend!satoru who insists on massaging your back when you come round. ‘take your top off baby it’s just me’. he’s working on getting you to take off the bra too, all in good time.

bestfriend!satoru who is so used to you wearing long sleeved and baggy hoodies that the random times you wear something that clings to your figure he all but passes out. suddenly his hands are all over you and to everyone else in the room you probably look like a couple. (just how he intended)

bestfriend!satoru who insists kissing your best friend on the lips is normal. it’s cute. ‘come on baby another one. i’m your best friend’. is using tongue normal? he doesn’t care.

bestfriend!satoru who wears compression shirts around you all the time because he overheard you talking about how much you like guys with big biceps. he doesn’t want to sound big headed but he’s caught you staring a few times now.

bestfriend!satoru who goes through your underwear drawer when you’re not present. he wanted to know your cup size but the pink and the lace got him distracted.

bestfriend!satoru who really is such a perv when it comes to you. he can’t help it you’re like a drug. sometimes he knocks his pen off the table because he knows your sweet self will quicky bend over to retrieve it for him. he’s left with the adorable sight of your panty clad ass, white ones today just how he likes. ‘thank you baby.’ ‘you’re welcome toru.’ god you’re just so cute.

bestfriend!satoru who helps you dye your hair. he doesn’t care that he’s leaving with splotches of black on his arms and hands. it’s worth it when you give him those big hugs with your arms wrapped around his neck.

bestfriend!satoru who is in love with your handwriting. ‘course a pretty girl has pretty handwriting’ it’s all cursive and slanted, he even makes jokes about you writing something for him to get tatted.

bestfriend!satoru who knows you love to cuddle. he was never much of a cuddler himself but he would have to be sick to pass up on the chance to hold you. ‘no of course i dont mind pretty.’ your head lays on his chest and one of your thighs covers his stomach. he could die like this and he would die happy. (preferably he would die in between your thighs but)

bestfriend!satoru who gets upset when you’re laughing a bit too loud when talking to suguru. he knew for a fact suguru was not that fucking funny.

bestfriend!satoru who absolutely abuses pet names when it comes to you. His baby His pretty girl His dolly

bestfriend!satoru who’s always patting your bum. for what reason who knows.

part 3 !! part 4 !!

taglist : @haruhatake @moncher-ire @startwithrecords @ranatherealestsigma @chjinua @whozeurdaddy @sukuxna0 @purp1eha1o

[walking-loather]

I think. If you take out a loan. You should be able to pay off the principle first, and worry about the interest afterwards. The way loans work currently where you spend years just paying off interest first before you even touch the principle is just so fucking predatory. Like it's just about greed. Just money, money, money, and keeping the poor and working class imprisoned in debt for their whole lives. Makes me furious. I'm never going to take out a loan if i can help it.