#(and it'll be a long long time until they can all be together again after that)
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captainsparklefingers · 2 years ago
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You know what I love?
(and by love I mean am emotionally crushed by?)
We've now seen Vax and Vex's connected threads of fate severed. They're on different paths now, not fated to always be connected, because now Vax's fate is directly tied to the Matron of Ravens (to death).
And you know what else?
Vax is the only one in the opening who doesn't see or react to the thread of fate. All of Vox Machina does, save him.
Vax is the only one who won't have the same fate as the rest of his friends and family. He's destined to be on a separate path from the rest of them. Vox Machina gets to stay together. They're all connected. No matter how much he may want to be, Vax doesn't have that connection. And one day, he'll have to walk away to where his thread of fate leads him to. To the Matron. To death. To divinity.
Without his family.
....I think I'm gonna go lie down now.
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tacticalprincess · 6 months ago
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imagining blue collar könig nd im going a bit feral rn 🧑‍🦯 ijk that man will get you pregnant any chance he can get
tw heavy breeding kink, lactation kink, pregnant sex.
blue collar!könig who gets off on being the cause of your wide hips and full, heavy breasts. goes insane seeing you walk around the house barefoot and swollen with his offspring, your soft, plump body a telltale sign of how well taken care of you are by your husband. a sick, possessive side of him loves knowing that when you're out in public, it's apparent that you're taken and claimed by him in every way, that his children are growing inside you.
pregnancy has granted you an ethereal glow that makes it impossible to say no to you, his cock chubbing up at the sight of you so domesticated for him. it doesn't help that your pregnancy hormones have you sopping wet and ready for it all hours of the day, keen on spreading your legs for him as soon as be gets home from work, begging for him to stuff you and make your cramps go away. and who is he to deny the mother of his children in her time of need? it's his duty as his husband to take care of you.
he fucks you as much as he can, the positions getting more and more accommodating as your stomach grows, but no less filthy and desperate on both ends. he helps relieve the pain in your tender breasts by sucking at your sensitive, leaky nipples while his cock pistons inside you, pumping your full womb while he laps at your sweet milk.
he falls in love with your wailing, chubby baby the minute you give birth, and it gets harder to adhere to the doctors orders of abstinence the more he sees how well you take to motherhood. he settles for eating you out after he's put the baby to sleep, helping you relax in the best way after a long night of staying up and tending to them. if you're up for it, he'll have you push your soft tits together so he can rut his hard dick into them, his thick cum mixing with your pearly milk.
however, the moment you come home from your follow up appointment after being given the okay, he's bending you over the nearest surface, intent on knocking you up again. promises to dote and take care of you all over again, as long as you give him another baby (or two or three.) doesn't let you off his cock until he's sure it'll take, only satisfied when your womb is bloated with his seed and your pregnancy tests come back positive. <3
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coff33andb00ks · 5 months ago
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Rule Breaker - Pt 1
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max verstappen x single mom!reader
{next}
face claim: none, random pinterest find warnings: cursing, max is broody, jos is an asshole, fluff, barely proofread, idk red bull team aside from Max, Checo, and Horner... (y/n's bestie is named after my irl bestie bc she told me to write this, and y/n's son is not named after Magnussen i swear) Summary: Max has it all...right? Besides, he's too busy collecting trophies and completing side quests for anything else. Until... You moved across a whole ass ocean to start over, uprooting you and your son's lives to become social media admin for cars that drive in circles. word count: 4293 auth.note: hiii new to writing for f1 so I'm posting this in the middle of the night and hiding in bed - feedback greatly appreciated. also this is forbidden love/he falls first/friends to enemies to lovers
"Hey Max, come meet the new social media admin."
On his way out, he barely heard the words. But they registered and he immediately turned, knowing how important it was to have a good rapport with the social media personnel. He only had to meet them, then he could leave and go to the team apartment and… He didn't know. Pass time in his sim until he couldn't hold his eyes open. Maybe he'd go for a run until he was close to exhaustion. Or see if Lando was in the country and they could go out together. It was only when he was about to pass out that he was able to sleep and not be plagued with dreams.
His eyes swept the small office, swiveling to focus on the new face. She smiled, giving him a little wave as she set down her slice of pizza.
"Max, this is y/n. Y/n, this is Max."
"Hello," he said, watching as she wiped her mouth with a napkin.
"Hi, sorry." She took a sip of her drink and wiped her mouth again. "Sorry – It's so great to meet you."
She was American. Walking over, he extended his hand. "Where are you from?"
Shaking his hand, she smiled up at him. "Well most recently I was with—"
"No, no, where in America," he corrected.
"Oh! North Carolina. I try to keep the country accent to a minimum but sometimes I slip up." She motioned to the pizza box on the desk. "You want a slice?"
No, he had to leave. His work was done, he didn't need to hang around and kill his precious down time. Besides, his diet was strict for the next few days, what with the race coming up. He had to focus on… Within fifteen seconds he was sitting across from her, holding a slice in one hand. One slice wouldn't hurt, he decided as he took a bite. "How long have you been in England?"
"About three weeks?" She glanced at her watch and nodded. "Three weeks tomorrow. I was staying at an Airbnb until a week ago when I moved into my apartment."
He nodded. "Are you going to be based here or go to the races?"
"Races. Gonna be living the glamorous life of travel and hotels and surviving on caffeine and sugar," she said with a roll of her eyes.
"It's not so bad."
"I'm sure I'll get used to it. You've been doing it for, what, half your life now?"
Shrugging, he took a sip of his water. "More than that, really. Are you saying you don't travel?"
"Not like this. I lucked out with my last job because I was able to do it mostly from home. I think I went up to New York or out to Cali maybe six times total? But I know I can do it," she added when his eyebrows lifted. "It'll just take a little getting used to, especially with a little one in tow a lot of the time."
That surprised him. His eyes immediately moved to her hands, which were completely bare of rings. "A little one?"
Y/n nodded, her eyes lighting. "He's three."
"What's his name?" Max asked. It was none of his business about the boy's father, anyway, so he wasn't going to ask about him. And he didn't even care.
"Kevin." Her smile was both shy and sparkling.
His chest tightened. Kevin, he knew, was one of the most loved children in the world. "What's he like?" The words came out and only after saying them he realized he wanted to know.
"He's… He's Kevin." She laughed. "He asks a million questions and will talk to anyone about anything. He's high energy but has laser focus when it's something that interests him – Like the other day I took him to the park. I expected him to be running around and trying out all the swings and stuff, but he spent an hour crawling in the grass following a caterpillar."
"Laser focus can be good at times," Max told her, earning a warm smile.
"I know. He comes by it honest because I do the same thing when I'm working."
"Will you be bringing him to the races?" Finished with his pizza, he shook his head when she nudged the box towards him and sat back to finish his water.
"Yeah. Not all of them, but to the next few. I already talked to Mr. Horner and Wanda about it," she said quickly, as though expecting him to be upset about her bringing her child to work. "He won't be in the way. My best friend – Ellie, she's his godmother – is traveling with me to Imola and Monaco to watch him for me. But her new job starts the first of June so I have to make arrangements before then."
"Does he like racing?"
"He's three," she deadpanned. "He loves anything with cars or trucks."
"You'll have to bring him to the track—"
"He also loves fart jokes and bugs."
Max blinked at her, snorting on a laugh when she grinned at him. "Fair enough."
"I do have to warn you, though," she said carefully, standing to gather the napkins and throw them into the trash. Closing the pizza box, she used a clean napkin to wipe off the desk. "He likes McLaren."
"It's the orange livery isn't it?" Max sighed. When she nodded, he shrugged. "I'll do my best to not hate him."
She giggled, letting out a snort.
And, for the first time in six months, Max felt lighter.
*-*
"There's my lil doodle bug," Viv cooed as Kevin leapt off the couch and ran towards her. Dropping her purse and work bag, she scooped him into a hug. "Hi sweetheart. How was your day, hm?"
Her son grinned, squeezing her tight. "I fell in poop!"
Viv froze for two seconds and leaned back a little. "What kind of poop?"
"Dog. Yes, it was fresh. Yes, he had a bath. Yes, I washed his clothes," Ellie announced as she came out of the kitchen, wiping her hands on a dish towel. "Your dinner's almost done – How was work?"
Viv kissed her son's cheek and set him down so she could pick up her bags. "I spent the day reading protocols and policies and signing contracts. Oh, and getting my uniform."
Ellie took the knapsack stuffed with team shirts and jackets. "Good thing you love blue huh?"
"No kidding." She glanced over to Kevin, who had climbed back onto the couch and resumed lining his hot wheels along the back. "How was he today?"
"He was fine. You worry too much, mama," Ellie said gently, following y/n to her bedroom. Setting the knapsack down, she took the work bag and reached inside to switch off y/n's work phone. "Ah, ah, you're off now. You don't officially start work until Monday, so they can't expect you to be on call."
"Yes ma'am." Y/n held her hands up in surrender. "I'm gonna change and get him tucked in then I'll eat, promise."
"Perfect. Bridgerton tonight?" Ellie asked on her way out the door.
"You know it!" y/n called after her.
Once she'd changed into sweats and an old t-shirt she went to the living room. "C'mon, doodle bug," she said softly, smiling when Kevin slid off the couch without hesitation. She helped him pack his cars into their cubby, telling him about her boring day at work while she led him to the bathroom so he could brush his teeth. Then to her bedroom, wishing she had been able to afford a larger apartment so he could have his own space. But he didn't seem to mind, and more often than not he ended up crawling into her bed during the night. Something she treasured, because she knew that all too soon he would be "too big" to share a bed with his mama.
Three storybooks and a rambling made up tale about a one-eyed dragon and the princess that saved him from the evil knight later, she pressed a kiss to his cheek and turned off the light. "Good night, sweetheart. Sweet dreams," she whispered before she left the room.
"So I met Max Verstappen today," she told Ellie a few minutes later while fixing her drink.
"Ooo Mr Tu Tu Du Du himself?"
Y/n snorted. "Yeah, that one." The chicken alfredo with a side of broccoli looked so much more appetizing than the greasy pizza she'd had for a late lunch, and she almost felt like she'd cheated on her best friend for ordering takeout.
"What's he like?" Ellie asked, scooping a little more sauce over the noodles.
"He's nice."
"Just nice?"
"I mean, he asked me surface level questions and laughed at my lame jokes? Yeah, nice." Y/n pulled her plate away before Ellie could push more food onto it and sat down to eat. "Everyone's been so nice, Ellie…"
Her friend squeezed her shoulder. "I'm so glad. I have good news, too."
Y/n lifted her eyebrows, unable to speak because her mouth was full.
Ellie sat down, smiling brightly. "I spoke to HR today and Kev will be able to use the daycare."
Gulping down her mouthful of food, y/n gasped. "Oh that's great!" she cried, feeling the weight of worry that had been plaguing her for three weeks lift. "They're sure?"
"Yep, you just have to come in with me before the first and sign a document giving me permission to take him from the premises."
"Excellent, we can go in the morning? I have to go in after lunch to get my kit. Camera, laptop, all that. And Wanda told me to get more shirts so I don't have to worry about laundry while on the road – Oh and I'll be getting our passes."
"Kevin is so excited about Italy. He wants to see the leaning tower of pizza."
"Bless his heart, maybe I can take him one day."
Plans made, she finished her late dinner and did the washing up then changed into her pajamas before settling on the couch to watch Bridgerton. They were rewatching the series so she didn't feel guilty about scrolling her social media, finally biting the bullet and following all of the RedBull people she knew from headquarters.
"You are the bane of my existence… and the object of all my desires."
"Ugh," Y/N and Ellie whined in unison.
"So much nicer than you've had me hard since we met," y/n muttered.
"Let's be real, practically anything is better than that," Ellie agreed.
They finished the episode and y/n headed to bed, keeping as quietly as possible even though she knew her son could sleep through anything. Digging her work phone from her bag, she powered it on to check for any missed messages, smiling slightly when she saw Max had added her on WhatsApp. Adding him back, she was about to turn the phone off again when a new message popped up.
👋🏻
Rolling her eyes, she replied with the same emoji and waited a few seconds before plugging the phone in and turning on do not disturb. She wasn't going to have a late night chat with Max Verstappen of all people. He was probably just being nice, she told herself as she brushed her teeth and did her skincare. Wanda had told her that Max added everyone but rarely messaged anyone aside from Mr. Horner or the engineers.
Besides, she wasn't there to make friends, she reminded herself as she climbed into bed. She could be friendly, but she was there to do a job.
And no flirting with him either, she thought, immediately wondering why the idea had popped into her mind. She would never – okay, she might, if unintentionally. She knew it was a protective thing, knew it was because she had the undesirable need to have everyone like her. But she couldn't do it. Not with him, especially. He'd probably laugh in her face. He was younger than her and probably had a never ending line of gorgeous women waiting to please him.
Before she switched off the lamp she glanced over at her sleeping son. A living, breathing, very real reminder of what she'd gone through just four years ago. And she knew she couldn't go through that again. She wasn't strong enough. She refused to endure that torture and heartache. Kevin needed her, so she had to be strong for him.
Not to mention there was a no hanky-panky clause in her contract?
She had barely closed her eyes when she heard his toddler bed creak. Lying there, she listened to his feet whispering against the rug, smiling in the dark when he slowly slid the covers back.
"Mama," he whispered, and she reached for him. He snuggled close, tucking his head under her chin as she pulled the covers over them.
"Love you, sweetheart," she murmured, pressing a kiss into his hair.
"Love you, Mama."
*-*
"I think it's good, yeah," Max said, eyes scanning the screens of data from the upgrades. "It'll be great for turn seven." Nodding, he listened to the engineers as they went over potential upgrades for Monaco. Once the meeting was finished he grabbed his water bottle and left the room, ignoring the almost immediate phone call from his father. He knew it was his dad without checking, and strode down the hall, intent on leaving and heading straight for the airport to go home. Where he could ignore everything and everyone until Sunday when it was time to fly to Italy.
Rounding the corner, he lurched to a stop as a small child darted in front of him, his giggles echoing down the corridor. The little boy stopped and looked up at Max, blinking slowly.
"Hi!" He waved.
"Hello." Max heard rapid footsteps and glanced up to see y/n iquickly approaching.
"Kevin Scott—"
"I've got him," Max told her with a quick wave, squatting down to the boy's level. "So you're Kevin?"
The boy nodded, light blonde curls bouncing on his head. "I'm Kevin. That's Mama."
"I'm Max. I heard a lot about you."
Kevin's eyes widened. "You know Mama?"
"About this much." Max held his thumb and index finger barely a centimeter apart. He quickly looked to y/n, who was walking up behind Kevin. "I work with her."
"Ohh… She's gonna take me to see cars. D'you like cars Mister Max?" he asked seriously. As though cars were the most important thing in the universe.
"More than I like myself some days," Max quipped, reaching to check the miniature car the boy was holding in his hand. "I drive one like this."
Kevin gasped. "Do you got it here?"
Max chuckled. "We have a lot. Do you want to see them?"
"Please," the boy said, and Max couldn't have said no under any circumstances.
"You have to ask your mum," he said gently. "And maybe say sorry for running away from her?"
Kevin immediately turned to his mother. "Mama I sorry. Can Mister Max take me to cars?"
She sighed, squatting down to fix his shorts. "We've gotta be more careful, sweetheart. And yes, Mister Max can take us to see the cars."
Kevin spun to face Max again. "She said yes!"
Grinning, Max nodded and stood.
"Thank you," y/n said softly. "I'm sor—"
"He's three, yeah?" Max reached to place his hand on the boy's head, gently guiding him closer when he started to wander off. "Don't apologize for him being a child."
She tipped her head at that, then nodded, grabbing hold of Kevin's hand as Max turned to lead them back down the hallway he'd just left. "I only came by to get my kit, and his aunt had paperwork at her new workplace to finish up, so I had to bring him."
"I'm glad you did." Max gave her a gentle smile, using his card to open the door leading to the back of headquarters. "Have you been back here?"
"Only on my tour the other day."
"Just stick with me," he said. They wouldn't be entering the engineer or design areas, only taking the corridor to the garage. Otherwise they'd have to travel all the way to the main entrance and walk around to the back, which would be tedious for her son.
"I'm under contract and signed an NDA, and it's not like I'd know where to go to sell team secrets," she told him. "And I wouldn't even know what I overheard."
"Not a car fan?" he asked, accepting the model car Kevin was shoving at him. Slipping it into his pocket, he guided them along the curving corridor.
"Eh… Kinda? I like racing. I don't understand all the mechanics to it, I just like the adrenaline of watching twenty guys drive really fast. And I can admire good craftsmanship, like a Bugatti or a McLaren, ya know?"
"What do you drive?" Max asked, using his card to open the door to the garage. Met with the faint aroma of rubber and asphalt, he inhaled deeply, catching with it a lighter, more pleasant scent.
"Nothing at the moment. I've been taking an Uber to and from the apartment," she explained. "I'll probably get a used car after my first paycheck."
Max furrowed his brows, stopping on the catwalk. "You haven't gotten paid yet?"
"No? Well, only my signing bonus, and that's gone to household necessities like rent and food. It's fine, Max, I don't need a car right now."
What are you going to do, give her one of yours? he thought, reaching to Kevin and lifting the boy to his hip so he could carry him down the stairs to the main level. Kevin was already oohing and aahing over the neat rows of cars. "It's just me, Brandon," he called, seeing the member of the security team at the other end of the garage. "A quick tour for a new friend, yeah?"
Brandon waved and disappeared around the corner.
At the bottom of the stairs, Max set Kevin down, ushering him to the nearest car. The boy's excitement was contagious, and Max gleefully told him about each one that he'd driven, helping the boy climb into each and press buttons on the steering wheel. Laughing when Kevin made racecar noises, he pulled out his phone to pull up some videos for sound effects. Swiping away the notifications from his dad, he turned up the volume so the engine sounds echoed in the garage, enjoying Kevin's childish glee.
"This one you know," he said, guiding him to the most recent addition. Lifting him into the seat, he squatted down. "This is a car I drove last year, which—" He pulled the model car from his pocket and set it on top of the steering column. "—is just like the one you have."
"Wow." Kevin looked at him with pure awe. "Did you win?"
"I did. And I won the championship too."
"You're a champ-een, Mister Max?" the boy gasped.
"I am."
"Like Lightning McQueen?"
"You could say that," he chuckled, affectionately ruffling the boy's curls. Glancing over at y/n, he paused when he saw she was holding up her phone.
She peered at him over the top. "Is it okay to take pictures?"
"Of course." He had a feeling she'd already taken dozens. He stepped out of the way so she could get photos of Kevin in the car, then lifted him out once she tucked her phone away. "Have you seen the trophies?"
"No. Can we see 'em, Mister Max? Please?"
"You have to ask your mum." Turning, he sent y/n a pleading look as Kevin asked permission.
"As long as Mister Max doesn't mind," she said, rolling her eyes when Kevin squealed yay.
"It's a long walk, do you want me to carry you?"
Kevin squirmed, wriggling so he was piggybacking. "Thank you Mister Max."
His chest tightened, and he reached to adjust the boy's legs around his middle. "You're welcome, Kevin. We do have to make a stop on the way to the trophy case, though."
Next to him, y/n cleared her throat. "I can take him if you've got something to do."
"No, it's fine, a quick stop," Max assured her, motioning for her to go up the stairs first.
"A pit stop?" Kevin asked, giggling as Max jogged up the steps.
"Exactly that. No more than ten seconds," he promised.
Fifteen minutes later, he was squatting down to fix the collar of Kevin's new shirt. "There you go, mate. What do you think?"
Kevin grinned and gave him a thumb's up.
Max looked up at y/n, who rolled her eyes. "He has to be Team Red Bull," he explained with a shrug, adjusting Kevin's new cap with a grin. Thanking the merch manager, he handed over the bag of goodies he'd grabbed and motioned for Kevin to climb onto his back.
"Thank you!" Kevin called, waving enthusiastically as he was carried out.
"Thank you, Max," y/n murmured while they walked towards reception. "But please don't get him anything else."
"I won't," he said softly. "If I overstepped—"
"No, no, it's fine. He'll wear the shirts until they're too small and he'll play with the models until they fall apart. I just don't want him to think he'll get this type of treatment all the time."
"I understand." He nodded. She didn't want her son to be spoiled. Which he found admirable. "…So giving him one of my old cars is out of the question?"
She halted, jaw dropping. "Max!"
"A joke!" he promised, flashing her a grin as he jogged ahead.
"Not funny," she scoffed behind him, and he heard her huff as she ran to catch up. "Those things cost probably a million—"
Max swung around, easily catching Kevin and swinging him back onto his back. "The car for Miami was about sixteen million."
Her eyes widened. "Sixteen—" She pressed her hands together right in front of her mouth. "Million? As in sixteen then six zeroes behind it?"
Nodding, he started walking backwards, amused at her reaction. She was staring at him in shock, and her son was giggling. "It's hard to pinpoint an exact cost, because we reuse some components from race to race. A chassis, or wings, yeah? If you really wanted to know I can pull up the data and get the price for each part—"
"No," she said, shaking her head slowly. "Please don't. I'd probably faint."
"It's an expensive sport, y/n," he reminded her.
"Yeah no shit," she muttered, exhaling harshly. "I've got so much to learn."
"You'll be fine." He'd meant it to come out in an offhand manner. A generic it's okay so feelings wouldn't be hurt. But it came out gently, laced with reassurance and promise. And, before he could stop himself, his mouth opened again. "If you have any questions you can ask me."
"I can Google," she told him.
"I can change my Wikipedia to say I'm eighty-six. Doesn't make it true," he quipped.
To his relief, she laughed. "Fair point. I'll be sure and ask you."
He turned his attention back to Kevin, swinging him from his back to his hip. Reception was empty, and he set the boy down so he could explore the various displays. "He can't hurt anything," he reassured her, knowing she was watching carefully as Kevin ran over to a wing displayed on the wall.
"I just worry," she sighed.
"Why do you sound like you're apologizing?" Folding his arms over his chest, he watched Kevin walk around the large room, drinking it all in. "You're his mother, you're supposed to worry. If you didn't you would have to apologize."
"Thank you."
"He's a good kid, y/n," he said softly.
"I think so too." He could hear the smile in her voice and turned slightly to see it on her face.
Every other time he'd been in this room the weather outside had been cloudy or rainy. He couldn't remember the sun ever shining as he'd stood there to soak in all the history. Until now. It poured through the windows, causing the trophies in the cases to sparkle and the polished floor to gleam. It shone into her eyes, and he could only stare at her as she squinted a little, a tiny dimple appearing in her left cheek.
God, she was lovely.
She glanced at him and his breathing kickstarted. Unconsciously licking his lips, he cleared his throat. "You seem to be doing well, for a single mom."
Her smile faltered and he mentally kicked himself. She looked to Kevin, who was studying the Red Bull logo on the wall, and looked at Max again. "I didn't have a choice."
"I'm sorry," he said automatically.
"Oh he's not dead." She watched her son, her smile gone. "Just dead to us."
"Then I'm sorry for bringing it up." It had ruined the day. Well, alright, not the day but the moment. They'd been having fun, he'd been having fun.
You always fuck up don't you?
His jaw clenched as the angry voice from years ago echoed in his mind.
"It's okay, Max." Her gentle voice cut through the echoes of the past and he forced his jaw to relax.
Nodding, he uncrossed his arms and called to Kevin, taking him by the hand and leading him to the towering trophy case. "Come on, y/n, time to learn some history."
She snorted on a laugh but joined them, and he could tell she was paying attention as he rattled off years and races and drivers to Kevin.
You're going to fuck this up too, the voice sneered.
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whateveriwant · 1 year ago
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Can you please do Task force 141 finding out they’re having quintuplets! I’d imagine that they wouldn’t plan to have that many….at least not all at once 🧍‍♀️
Ghost
When the technician points out the five distinct dots on the ultrasound, he immediately goes dead silent
I mean, he's always pretty quiet anyway, but this is like quiet quiet
He doesn't utter a single word for the rest of the appointment, nor on the ride back home for that matter
This has you more concerned than you care to admit because you know that, not that long ago, he didn't think he'd ever have (much less want) kids of his own some day
So now that he's learned he's about to have five? You can't imagine what's going through his mind right now
It isn't until you're walking through the front door that you're being stopped with a gentle hand tugging on your wrist
You turn to look at him and, without a word, he drops to his knees before you, rolling up the bottom of your shirt to expose your belly
He'll press the softest of kisses just beside your navel, before looking up at you with expressive eyes that convey the foremost thought in his head: Thank you
Soap
Nearly shits a brick the moment the words leave the technician's mouth
All the color swiftly drains from his face and he has to sit down before he keels over right in the middle of the office
It's not so much fear that has him going paper white but pure shock at hearing the unexpected (yet not unhappy) news
While you'd already discussed having a big family together one day, you didn't think you'd get it done in one fell swoop
However, maybe you should've seen it coming since you both come from families that have had multiples
The possibility of this happening was decently high, so in a way, you're not all that surprised by the revelation
Once he's composed himself and is a little less ghostly pale in the face, he's eagerly requesting the technician to print out an excessive number of copies of the ultrasound
Why? Well, he's gotta send them to everyone, of course! His family, your family, all the lads at work. Hell, maybe your neighbor Charlie would like one too. Better print several just in case
Gaz
"C– Come again?" He thinks he misheard the technician at first
However, even hearing it a second time, he has to stand up, round the bed, and get about an inch away from the monitor to confirm for himself
It's almost comical the way his eyes widen at the screen, darting around the black and white image like he can't comprehend what he's seeing
It'll take some coaxing to get him back in his seat, and as he does, you hear him mumbling to himself – something about nappies, never sleeping again, and *shudders* University
At some point, out of the corner of your eye, you see him messing with his hands
He's putting his palm in front of his own stomach then drawing it about a foot or two away, as if trying to visualize the size your belly is destined to grow
Even when you get back home, it's like reality hasn't fully hit him yet
It's not until you find him at 2am looking up double decker prams that you realize it's finally starting to sink in, and he's more than ready for the challenge ahead
Price
Seems awfully calm when the technician breaks the news to you two
Based on his reaction – a light smile and mere "Oh, that's wonderful" – you'd think he'd just been informed of the weather or something
To be honest, his reaction (or lack thereof) is a little disarming, but you don't comment on it until you're buckling up in the car, mentioning his seeming total lack of nerves about the future
He chuckles and jokes that he already has to look after three big kids at work. What's five little ones at home to compare?
Though you think you can see what he's getting at, his cool-headedness about it all still has you in a bit of a tizzy
Is he not even a little surprised by the news? After all, it's not every day that people fall pregnant with quintuplets
At your question, he smiles and leans to press a bristly kiss to the back of your hand. When he pulls back, he's smirking, giving you the smuggest look you've ever seen from a man
"Told you I've got strong swimmers, love"
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amazinglyashy · 20 days ago
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HI I LOVE ur lads headcanons ‼️ idk if u do angst but im feeling some angsty/hurt/comfort........... can i pls request the lads men's reaction to the reader rejecting their confession bc we think they deserve better...... someone who doesn't have a heart condition (like the mc) or something........
Oh my gosh, thank you so much!! And oh man, I love angst and hurt/comfort, as long as I get to give it a tiny bit of hope/a happy ending! I felt this one though, I've thought about it before with my own MC…….. a few dozen times- Hope you enjoy, and thank you for the request! <3
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Love and Deepspace Li’s reactions to you rejecting their confession due to feelings of inadequacy
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Rafayel -
Rafayel is… surprised, to say the least.
Not only do you not have any memory of him or the things you did together- the things you did to him- but you also are straight up turning him down when he finally realized that he needs to confess to you all over again.
He's pretty upset.
It'll definitely turn into an argument, and you know he's hurt. Damn, you're hurt too, just having to turn him down. He makes you feel something, like you're special. Like you're everything to him. Like you're not…
Broken.
And it'll come out eventually. Maybe not blatantly so, but in small ways, your feelings of inadequacy will start to leak through the cracks that are forming in your resolve as you try to refuse a man who has already been refused his love by fate and prophecy for far too long.
And somehow, that makes it so much worse. Because he can fight fate, he can go against the currents of time and the ever evolving cruelty of human nature. But he can't do anything about the feelings raging inside your own head.
He's sure going to try though.
Angrily but calmly, he will start firing off things he has done for you, just because he's loved you so much, throughout all of your time together and even before. He doesn't know if it'll make it worse, make you feel like he already does too much for whatever it is you see yourself as, but he's going to do it anyway. And slowly, it'll start forming into the things you two do together- the things you've done for him when he needs you.
And you're going to be there a while, because until you start to realize, until he starts to chip away at that dark feeling in the deepest reaches of your mind and heart, he's not going to let up.
Not now, not ever.
Sylus -
He's a bit taken aback, but he's not particularly surprised. He had seen this coming, mentally prepared himself for it, even. He knew after his treatment of you when the two of you had just met again for the first time, that any sort of official relationship between you two would be tricky to get to. Especially putting an actual label on it.
He'll be a lot more surprised when he reads between the lines at your words, and realizes it's not because you're still scared of him, but because you don't think you're good enough for him.
"You can't be serious, sweetie."
He's not going to force you to accept his confession, but regardless of how timid or aggressive you become, whether you escalate it vocally or try to exit the conversation, he's not arguing with you. He pretty much refuses to, as he instead begins to state snarky facts as he crosses his arms, watching your reactions as he does.
"When you patched my wounds a month ago, was I not deserving of your hands caring for me because they were shaky and belonging to you? How about that girl you muttered about that we saw at the café who was mad at her boyfriend to the point of shouting, when he didn't get her the right cake she wanted? Are you saying you're worse than her? Helping me on jobs simply because you want to exist near me is… not good enough for me?"
"Sylus, that's not what I'm saying-"
"Oh don't worry sweetie. I know exactly what it is you're saying. I just know it's a particularly misinformed, self loathing thought for you to be having. Don't you think it's insulting for you to decide who I give my love to? After every calculated decision you have witnessed me make?"
He'll finally soften, reaching out a hand to gently rest on the side of your neck, his thumb brushing against your cheek in a gentle back and forth.
"You don't need to be concerning yourself with what I deserve in a partner. You should have faith in my opinions, if not for yourself, but for your confidence in me, sweetie. After that, the rest is up to what you truly want in your heart."
Zayne -
His reaction is definitely the most reserved initially, especially until he realizes why exactly you're turning him down.
He definitely has the passing thought that maybe you're just misunderstanding him again, just like back with the snow seals when the two of you were still kids.
When he realizes that's not the case, and instead, it's your own internalized feelings, he's first a bit relieved, and secondly- pretty perturbed.
"It's interesting to know that's your perspective, given how much you enjoy those fictional stories with ironic pairings. I would think that it would be the most romantic thing for a heart patient to be in a relationship with a cardiac surgeon.
His biting but well-meaning quips aside, he's not quite sure how to break it to you that he used to be in a similar boat, and still is to some capacity. Which is partly why he's a bit upset to understand your perspective.
He's genuinely surprised you haven't processed the timeline of the two of you and your lives. Your accident that caused the state of your heart, his leaving to study medicine and become a specialist in cardiology and a renowned cardiac surgeon- are you not able to see that it's not an inadequacy for him, but his own lack of knowledge when you first started having issues made himself feel inadequate? Why he left without a word for years in the first place?
And not just that- it also applies to other fields too. He has no issues helping you where you need him, because he knows the extent of your capabilities, much like he knows his own. And he will spend forever if he needs to, to show you that loving is not about who does more. It's about doing what your partner needs, no matter how much or how little that is, and loving each other through every hard moment.
And you're about to hear every ounce of his convincing, opinions, and own feelings, until you start to see. Until you finally see.
Xavier -
Unless you tell it to him straight, he's not going to know why you rejected him. He'll be hurt, but he'll accept your rejection graciously and politely, before trying to figure out just how to get you to accept it.
There's an increase in claw machine dates, movie night invitations, and how much he helps you with missions or even just around your apartment. Eventually, you process the weird behavior and you're all but forced to confront him on really truly why you rejected him.
It's Xavier, so you try to play it off as a lighthearted situation or a joke, but you can see his expression darkening, and you're not sure if it's because of him being upset at your words, or realizing just how much time he has sunk into you with how... broken of a person you are.
Turns out, it's the former!
It's hard to not realize such, as he's pulling you into the tightest hug he's probably ever grabbed you into.
For a while, it's just you and him standing there, with him squeezing you tightly and you not knowing what to do with your hands or the lump rising in the back of your throat. He doesn't really know what to say, but he does know he needs to say something.
"I'll definitely make you see that you're more than enough for me."
"Xavier- that's not how this work-"
"I know, and I don't care. I- I need you to know that you're everything to me. You're not inadequate, or broken, or anything you've been telling yourself. You're more than enough. You're more than everything to me. And I'm not going anywhere until you finally understand that."
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mostlymarvelsstuff · 4 months ago
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Good Luck Babe
Summary: Natasha is conflicted on her sexuality due to the way shes been raised. This causes her to act rather harmfully as she pulls both Y/n and Steve along for the ride. (No powers AU)
Authors note: In case it wasn't obvious this fic was very much inspired by "Good Luck, Babe!" by Chappell Roan
Warnings: smut(fingering, hickies, scissoring), angst(internalized homophobia, brief Nat x Steve), hurt/comfort, happy ending
Word count: 5748
Natasha Masterlist Marvel Masterlist
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     Natasha shivers as the air in the room starts to feel cold on her exposed body. Noticing her discomfort you quickly reach over and pull the blanket over you both. Her eyes drift up to your face and you smile softly at her while admiring the different green hues and flecks of gold that make up her eyes
   “Y/n….” She whispers, not wanting to disturb such a serene moment 
   “Yeah baby?”
   Her heart almost always melts whenever you call her that, though she may never admit that to herself,  “Kiss me?”
   You had to chuckle a bit. This wasn't your first time in a situation like this with her, plus the two of you had just spent hours entangled in each other while having sex. And yet here she was acting almost shy. You lean forward and connect your lips to hers. The kiss is soft and sweet, and if you didn't know better you'd say it was filled with love. But you do know better. And you also know, she'll be gone by morning.
   You both break apart and she scoots impossibly closer, resting her face against your chest as her arm drapes over your midsection, “Goodnight Tasha”
   “Goodnight Y/n”
   The next morning when you wake up the opposite side of the bed is empty, and the lack of presence from the redhead stings despite this being exactly what you expected. The bed always feels colder without her, and though your brain tells you it'll never happen, a part of your heart longs for a day when you wake up to her greeting you a good morning.
   Eventually you had dragged yourself out of bed and gone about your morning as you normally would. Breakfast, shower, drive to work. Once at work your day was rather dull, full of paperwork, phone calls and meetings. As per usual. And also as usual your best friend texts you just as your lunch break begins, once again giving no indication that last night's events had transpired
   Natty: Hey, you coming to the club later?
   Y/n: Yeah, I’ll be there
   Natty: Great :) See you later then
   Y/n: See you tonight  
   You’d made arrangements days ago to meet up with your friends at a nearby nightclub after your shift today, and honestly you were dredging doing so now. Natahsa was going to be there, which was doable. You’ve been pretending to still be nothing more to her than her best friend for the past month now so it wasn’t a strain, just disappointing. What you were actually concerned about was Steve. 
   He was sure to be there, which normally meant little to you, but lately he and Nat have been getting rather close. Close enough that there's talk of them potentially getting together soon. And that thought made your heart sink. You figured what you had with Nat was fleeting, she was clearly scared to embrace the fact that she was into women, but that didn’t mean you were ready to let her go. It didn’t mean you didn’t actually have feelings for her and were ready to watch her just move on. Especially with Steve of all people. But what could you do?
   Hours later you find yourself at one of the club's tables with Sam, Maria and Steve waiting for the others to arrive. Thankfully the blond doesn’t talk to you much, not that you struggle to be cordial, you just really didn’t want to engage with him. Which you suppose was a bit unfair considering he didn’t know what you and Nat had going on, but despite this you all manage to hold a conversation until Bucky and Sharon show up. With all but one now in attendance you all decide to go ahead and order your drinks, but before you can tell the bartender what Nat would want Steve does. You try not to frown, afterall this didn’t mean anything, everyone in the group knew everyone's orders. But it still puts a bad taste on your tongue.
   Finally the redhead shows up, and she offers you a bright smile as she approaches the group. You smile back but it's all for show really, because you know she’ll take the empty seat across from you next to Steve instead of the one next to you. Your heart sinks when she proves you right and you can’t help but let your smile drop. You thought you'd be used to this by now. She always goes back to acting as if she's not attracted to you. Acting like Steve is who she wants to be with when they haven't even entered a relationship and she's entering your bed most nights. 
   But you aren't used to it. It still stings and makes you jealous. But you kept your mouth shut. Better to have her one way then never at all. That's what you'd first told yourself. But now, you've fallen deeper for her, and watching her try to fall for someone else while still holding you, hurts. And you know that you have to say something soon or you'll only be hurt worse.
   As if trying to prove your inner monologue correct, Natasha leans closer to Steve and sets her hand on his forearm. Her thumb starts to rub soothing circles on his bare skin, just like she normally does with you when the two of you are alone, and he turns to offer her a smile before returning to his conversation with Sam. The interaction has you downing half your drink in one go and if you hadn’t been so quick to leave the table and excuse yourself to the bathroom you’d have noticed the look of concern that crossed the redheads face
   You stare at yourself in the bathroom mirror lost in a whirlwind of thoughts for a few minutes until the cause of said whirlwind opens the door. You attempt to straighten yourself out so you can ignore her arrival and leave but you should have known she wouldn’t let this be easy.
   “Are you alright?” she asks, placing her arm on your bicep to stop you from passing by
   Part of you feels cared for by the concern in her tone, but the other part of you remembers that she is the reason you feel this way, “Yeah, I’m good.”
   Her eyes soften as she looks you over, “You're not though. Something is bothering you.”
   You glance at the floor to avoid her gaze but she doesn’t like this very much and cups your face to bring your gaze back to her
   “You can talk to me, you know?”
   “I know” you admit, briefly contemplating if you really wanted to have this conversation in a dirty club bathroom, but you really don’t. You’d rather not have to have it at all truly, “Lets go rejoin the others before they get suspicious”
   She follows you back out and you both sit back down at the table. More drinks are ordered and the night goes on, and you do your absolute best to avoid how close Nats mouth gets to Steve's ear when she tells him things or how Steve's arm curls around her waist to keep her close to him. But while you're doing your best to ignore them Nat keeps her eye on you. She won't lie, she knows what she's doing is taking a toll on both herself and especially you, and she knows she'd be hurting if the roles were reversed. But she's terrified to allow that part of herself to exist, knowing the ramifications.
   Steve was the stereotypical “perfect” guy, and she knew being with him would make her parents happy and proud. They would love him. He was the safe choice, he was acceptable, he is who she's supposed to want. But that's the thing, she doesn’t really want him. She wants you, but every fiber of her being tells her that it's wrong. That she's not supposed to want you that way, that she shouldn’t be engaging in the sexual activity that she is with you, that her parents won't accept her. But each moment she spent with you just felt so right. She felt so hopelessly stuck on what to do
    A few days pass before you hear from Natasha again, and to no surprise you find yourself right back in the same position you always do, naked and in your bed. She's laying below you with her hands wrapped around your neck and her legs intertwined with yours as the two of you engage in a heavy and heated makeout session
  The need for air has the two of you breaking apart and you slowly make your way down her neck to her chest, kissing as you go. She lets out a few moans and whimpers each time you hit some of her more sensitive places, and she can tell by this that you're trying your best to work her up slowly. Problem is she can’t do slow, not tonight. Even though she desperately wants to
   “Y/n…” she moans as you near her hips
   “What is it baby?”
   “We can’t take too long” she admits in a hushed tone, “My date with Steves in a few hours”
   Your movements stop as you take in her words, and it honestly feels like your roof is crashing down over your head. How could she think coming here before going out on a date with him was the right move? And how could she think that you’d be okay with her just bringing that up while you're in this vulnerable position with her?
   “Natasha, I can’t keep doing this”
   This takes her by surprise and the use of her full name has anxiety building inside of her. She sits up on her elbows to look at you, “What do you mean?”
   You scoff, “You know exactly what I'm talking about. I'm tired of not being able to have you fully and always playing second to him. I'm tired of having your possessiveness but not your heart.”
   Oh if only you knew the truth, if only she could muster the courage to tell you. Instead all she can do is fumble her words, “Y/n, I…”
   “Save it.” You hiss, standing up. She feels more vulnerable than she ever has with you and moves her arms to cover herself. You feel guilty for this, but you can't hurt yourself anymore, “Get your clothes back on Natasha. I wouldn't want you to be late for your date. We’re done anyway”
“Are …are you saying we can't see each other anymore?” she asks, tears already starting to slide down her cheeks. She had expected this, had known it had been building for a while now and had a feeling that news would be the final straw. But she couldn’t hide this from you, nor would she ever lie to you about it 
   “Yes Natasha, that's exactly what I'm saying. I can't keep doing this back and forth between him and me. I need certainty and commitment, and I know I'll never get that from you” you admit, trying to blink away the tears in your eyes, “Whatever this was, is done. You can’t have both of us, and it's clear you've chosen him.”
   Her lip quivers at your harsh but not unfair words, and her heart aches, “I- ”
   “Just go Natasha!” you snap
   She quickly gets off your bed, picks up her clothes from your floor and dresses herself as she makes her way down the hall. Tears blur her vision as she continues towards your door, and her hand trembles when she reaches for the knob. She closes it behind her and rushes to her car before her emotions get the better of her.
   As soon as you hear your front door shut you let yourself slump down on your bed with a quiet sob. Part of you had hoped she’d fight what you were saying, admit to be scared and she’d stay looking for your comfort and support. But the other part of you had tried to be prepared for this outcome since day one. Tried being the key word, because when you love someone, you can only be so prepared to say goodbye when you're not the one chosen.
   Out in her car the redhead has no qualms about breaking down, and she does so right there in front of your house. A sob escapes her as the reality of the situation hits her. This isn’t what she wanted, but she knows it's what she caused by everything she put into motion with Steve. And honestly that makes the pain even worse, she's lost you and it's all because she's a coward.
   She somehow manages to make it back to her house despite crying almost uncontrollably the entire drive. Once inside she finds herself at a crossroads. Does she postpone her date with Steve, crawl into bed and mourn what could have been with you? Or does she find her resolve and force herself to see this through and go on pretending that it's Steve she wants?
   An hour later Steves at her door, and she opens it to greet him. He's in a nice pair of jeans and a button up shirt with a collar. His hair is neatly combed and he's sporting a huge smile. His eyes widen when he takes in her sundress, and her heart aches as she remembers that you’d had nearly the same reaction
  “Wow Nat, you look great” he admits before pulling out a small bouquet, “I got you these”
   She puts on her best smile and takes the flowers from him, “Thank you Steve, let me put them in some water and then we can go. Please come in”
   The blond stands in her living room, watching her with a fondness as she moves about the kitchen to find a vase and fill it with water. She sets it on the kitchen table before making her way back over to the man and he offers her his arm
   “Shall we go?” he asks, and she can only nod due to the lump in her throat
    He takes her to a quaint little restaurant that's a family run establishment, and they find themselves in a booth towards the back. Instead of sitting across from her he slides in beside her and though he seems to like this arrangement it makes her stomach drop. She wasn’t uncomfortable necessarily, but she certainly wasn’t at ease either. She didn’t want him to be so close, not when it was your presence she was craving.
   The two order and as they await their meal a casual conversation is had. Natasha thinks she's handling herself quite well in the face of everything until his arm moves to rest on the back of the cushion behind her shoulders. Instead of her usual nonchalance to his touch she finds herself starting to spiral. All she can think about is your touch, how your arms feel around her when you hold her. How safe and cared for it makes her feel. And instead she's here with Steve. She shouldn’t be but she is, and it takes almost everything in her not to tear up at the thought of you.
   Thankfully the food soon arrives and so his arm moves, allowing her to feel a bit calmer again. They carry on with sporadic conversation as they eat and while it's clear he's truly enjoying himself here with her, her mind drifts away back to you every chance she gets. How were you handling this? Were you alright? What on earth was she doing? If he notices her lack of attention or interest he doesn’t say anything, and honestly she's very grateful for that. 
   After they finish their meal he walks her back to his car and begins to drive her home. It wasn’t bad until his hand found purchase on her thigh, but she does her best to ignore the burning feeling of guilt and longing in her heart. But when his thumb starts to caress her skin as you usually did she finds herself becoming quite nauseous. Thankfully they finally pull up in front of her house and she tries not to seem too eager at the prospect as she exits his car.
   However Steve is a gentleman, and he insists on walking her to her front door. And though she should have expected his next move due to everything he's hinted at this evening, her mind was obviously a bit jumbled. So when he leans in for a kiss it takes her a moment to even process that his lips are on hers. Once she realizes however she finds herself panicking and unable to carry on this charade any longer. This was wrong. All wrong. 
   She brings her hands up to his chest and pushes him away, causing him to look at her in confusion. Tears start to build in her eyes as she rushes to explain herself, “I’m sorry Steve, I’m so sorry. I can’t do this, this was a mistake”
   He nods solemnly, “There's someone else, isn’t there?”
   “Yes, there is. And I shouldn’t be here, shouldn't have agreed to this. I should be with her” she admits, and it feels like a weights been lifted off her shoulders, “I’m so sorry, I never meant to lead you on or hurt you, and I never wanted to hurt her either”
   “Nat, breathe. Relax and take a deep breath” she does as told and he continues, “Its okay, I’m not mad. A bit disappointed this didn’t go as planned, sure. But it sounds like you were just trying to figure yourself out, and I can’t be upset at you for that”
   She lets out a deep breath and looks at him with gratitude, “Thank you, I just didn’t know what to do and now I’ve ruined everything”
   “Hey, you messed up, but nothing is ruined” he says, giving her a soft smile, 
   She scoffs “She probably hates me. Probably wouldn’t even trust me after this.”
   “Nat, this girl clearly has your heart. If you don’t at least try, you’ll forever live with the what ifs.”
   She looks at him and knows he's right. Plus she owes it to not only herself but to you to finally be honest and sincere about everything, “Thank you Steve, for everything. I've got to go”
   He nods and watches her rush off to her car and stands there still as she pulls out of her driveway. Her tires squeal as she turns and he can’t help but think how lucky this mystery girl was to have Natashas affections, especially when they appeared to run as deeply as they did.
   You're startled by a loud and frantic knocking at your front door and cautiously make your way to open it. To say you're surprised to see the redhead there would be an understatement and you certainly weren’t prepared for the words that rapidly spill out of her mouth either
   “Y/n, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. And I understand completely if you still send me away after this, but you deserve to actually hear it. I've been an idiot and a coward, and I haven’t been treating you right at all. I made such a mess of everything all because of my fears and I selfishly dragged you and poor Steve into my mess. But please know I’ve never wanted Steve, not ever. I’ve just been too afraid to admit to both myself and anyone else what I like and who I truly want.” 
   You carefully cup her face in your hands, and she looks at you expectantly through her watery eyes, “And who do you want, Tasha?”
   “You, I want you.” she finally admits, sending both of your hearts racing, “All I could think about on that stupid date was you. And god Y/n, I never wanted to hurt you, leaving here earlier was such a mistake- ”
   Your lips crash into hers, effectively cutting off her rambling, and she practically melts against you. Her arms wrap tightly around your waist as if to show you how she never intends to let you go again, and your thumbs brush away the stray tears from her cheeks as you deepen the kiss. And her hold on you never falters even when you pull away for air
   “You came back” you whisper in disbelief, making her heart ache
   “There's nowhere else I'd rather be. I’m just so sorry it took me so long to find my courage, detka(baby). Ya tebya lyublyu”
   Now it's your turn to shed a few tears, “I’m pretty sure I know what that means, but I’d like confirmation”
   She smiles at you, “I love you”
   “I love you too” you reply, your voice a bit strained from choking back your emotions. Afterall, you never thought you’d hear her say it, let alone have the chance to say it back, “I thought I’d lost you”
   Her hold on your waist tightens, “I’m so sorry. I’m never going anywhere. Not ever again. I’m yours, if you’ll still have me.”
   You really never thought she’d choose to be here with you over the life expected of her. But she did, she's here and finally ready to be with you fully, “Of course I’ll still have you, Tasha.”
   She smiles an ear to ear smile and lets out a carefree giggle before launching herself into your arms, “I won’t ever let you down again, I promise”
   “Come on, let's head inside” you suggest, kissing the top of her head before gently tugging her towards the house
   She eagerly follows and you barely manage to get the door shut and locked before she's wrapping her arms around you once more. Your arms instinctively wrap around her waist as she nuzzles her face against your neck, and you can’t help but smile when she lets out a soft giggle. You can tell how happy she is now that she's embracing her true self with you, and it honestly has you elated. Not just because she chose to be with you either, while that does add to it, but because she's no longer letting anyone else's thoughts, opinions, or judgements dictate how she lives or loves.
   After a few more moments she leans back out of your embrace and begins to pull you out of the entryway and further into the house. She doesn’t keep her hands off you for long though, because as soon as you enter the living room she's guiding you over to the couch. You plop down on one of the cushions and before you can even question what she's up to she's straddling your lap. Your hands find purchase on her hips while hers rest on your shoulders. She looks down at you with a smile before leaning in for another kiss. It starts off as a series of soft and loving kisses, but the longer you two sit there the more it evolves into a full blown make out session.
   Before long her hands are tangling in your hair and your grip on her waist moves up under her shirt to caress the skin by her waistline. She lets out a soft moan at the touch but pulls back away from you a bit. At first the rapid movement of her chest leads you to believe that she's only catching her breath but that's not the case
   “Are you sure?” she asks with a vulnerability you've not yet seen shining in her eyes
   “Tasha, this isn’t anything new for us” you point out with a smile
   “But it is,” she insists, “Every other time both of us were unsure of the other's feelings and trying to ignore our own. And don’t get me wrong the sex was good, like really good, but it was just hooking up. This time I want something….”
   “Real” you finish for her, looking at her knowingly, “You want something as intimate as you feel”
   “Yes. And I definitely don’t want it on the living room sofa”
   You chuckle, “I agree, come on”
   She quickly removes herself from your lap and waits for you to stand before she begins to make her way back the hall to your room, and you find it quite adorable how her smile never fades from her face. Once in your room she approaches you and her hands find the familiar place on your hips once more. She kisses you again, softly yet hungrily before tugging on the bottom of your shirt
   “Can I?” You nod and lift your arms to help her get you out of your shirt, and your bra follows soon after it, “God, you're so beautiful detka(baby). I haven’t told you that enough, but I won’t go a single day without reminding of it now”
   Your cheeks flush at her words and you manage to get out a hushed, “Thank you Tasha”
   She smiles and pecks your lips again before her hands find the waistline of your jeans and she looks at you expectantly. You nod your permission once more and soon your pants and underwear are on the floor too. 
   “Your turn” you tell her, reaching for her shirt, “If thats ok?”
   She eagerly nods, “Yes. Please”
   Her clothes get taken off even faster than yours had it seems, and your eyes rake over her bare body for a few moments before returning to hold her gaze. The way you look at her makes her bite her bottom lip and you let out a sigh
   “You're absolutely gorgeous, baby”
   It's her turn to flush then, and she finds herself unable to wait any longer. She surges forward, wraps her arms around you and kisses you passionately before moving you closer to the bed, “Lay down for me, please”
   You do as you're told and once she's sure you're in the position you want to be in she straddles you again. It's different this time though, because now you can feel her bare heat against your thigh, and she's already wet.
   Your hands move to her hips ready to help her start moving against you like you normally would, but she stops you, “Tasha?”
   “Shh detka(baby)” she coos, leaning over you slightly, “Just let me take care of you. Let me show you how special you are, how much you mean to me”
   “Okay” you agree in a mere whisper, your mouth too dry to be any louder currently
   Natasha smiles down at you while placing her hands on your stomach, and she traces shapes against the soft skin there before letting her hands roam across the rest of your body. Her touch is slow and gentle, but when she reaches your breasts you're unable to hold back a whimper of pleasure
   “That's it, let me hear you” she coaxes as her hands continue to palm your breasts, which causes more sounds of pleasure to leave you as her lips once again meet yours
   As her fingers tweak your nipples she ends up swallowing the next moan you make, which has her subconsciously grinding down on your thigh a few times, which only makes you moan again, a bit louder this time. She eventually pulls back from you only to start kissing down your jawline and to your chest, and your so distracted by the way her mouth feels that you hadn’t even notice her one hand had moved to brace herself on the bed while the other had moved to your pussy until her fingers are swiping through your folds
   “Don’t worry” she mumbles against your chest as she glances up at you, “Gonna take such good care of you”
   Your mouth parts with yet another moan as two of her fingers slip inside you, and she hums at the way your walls squeeze her. She starts to curl them and lets her palm brush against your clit as she continues to kiss your chest, slowly moving towards your breasts. She kisses one of your plump mounds a few times before wrapping her lips around your nipple, and then she finally begins to thrust her fingers
   “Oh god” you mumble, back arching slightly at the sudden spike of pleasure. She merely hums in acknowledgment as she continues her movements, and it isn't long until the sounds of your moans and arousal fill the room 
   She lets go of your nipple with a pop and quickly kisses her way back up your chest and jawline, “You're so wet detka(baby)”
   “Mhm” you answer, unable to currently form words, which proves to only spur her on. Her thrusts pick up speed then, causing you to cry out, “Ah! Tasha! I’m so close”
   Suddenly her lips brush against the shell of your ear, “Konchi dlya menya, moya lyubov'(cum for me, my love)”
   You aren’t sure what she's said, but it doesn't seem to matter, because it's what finally pushes you over the edge. You cum hard but she continues her movements, albeit more gently now, to help you come back down from your high. But as soon as you let out a whimper she knows you're too sensitive to continue. She lays herself further on top of you, calming you with her weight, then pulls her fingers out of you. She brings them up to her own mouth to clean them, and if you were more cognisant you'd have made a comment on it
   You spend the next minute or two catching your breath before you realize just how wet your thigh is, and you find your energy coming back as you get excited by the prospect of taking care of her now.
   You gently nudge her waist with your hand, “Roll onto the other side of the bed for me baby”
   She eagerly does as she's told and sits herself against the headboard, but you have to hold back a moan at the sight of her slick covered thighs as she gets herself comfortable. She bites her lower lip as you straddle her, and her hands instinctively grab your waist and pull you closer until your nose is brushing against hers
   “Hey” she breathes out, her eyes looking straight into yours
   “Hi” you reply, smiling stupidly before kissing her fiercely
   The two of you sit there making out for who knows how long until Natasha can ignore her aching needs no longer. She whines into your mouth and bucks her hips hoping you’ll get the idea. And you do, but she's a bit confused when you move back off her lap
   “Lift this leg for me” you pant, still a bit breathless.She does as you ask, but was in no way prepared for the way your warm and soaked pussy would feel right up against hers
   “Bozhe moy(oh my god” she moans, letting her head fall back against the headboard
   “Well, that sounded like somebody likes this”  you tease as you roll your hips, causing you both to let out moans 
   As your hips slowly keep moving you bring your hands up to her chest, and you gently squeeze her breasts a few times before you let your thumbs brush over her sensitive nipples. She brings her arms to hold you once more which in turn helps you in your movements
   “Oh! Feels so good!”
   You reply with a moan of your own as you lean into her, letting your forehead rest against her shoulder for a moment as you still toy with her tits. You can feel how rapidly her heart beats under your fingertips, and pride fills you knowing that it belongs to you as much as yours belongs to her. Of that you could be certain 
   You're suddenly overcome by the need to mark her flesh by her neck, and though you have had this urge before you had never acted on it due to all the complications. But it felt appropriate to act on it now. You bring your mouth to her neck and begin to kiss the skin there, which she doesn’t think twice about until she feels your mouth beginning to suck against her pulsepoint
   “Y/n” she whimpers out as her hold on your waist tightens
   You're sure there will be marks there tomorrow based on how you can feel her nail dig in but you hardly care. All you want is to make her feel as good and loved as she just had you feeling, and if that came with visible marks to either of you, then so be it. Your mouth moves to suck another, and then another and it has the redhead nearly falling to pieces 
   “I’m gonna cum. Please cum with me”
   You nod against her and she meets your next thrust with one of her own, sending you both headfirst into your orgasms. The low moan she lets out as her cum gushes against your own cum covers cunt is a sound you've not heard before, but your damn well determined to hear it again now
   The movement of her hands from your waist to the back of your neck has you focusing on her once more and you nearly melt when you see the love sick look on her face. You bring one of your hands up to cup her cheek and she leans into your touch with ease
   “I love you Natasha”
   She can’t help the tears that build in her eyes once more, “I love you too”
   The two of you bask in each other's presence just a bit longer before going to get cleaned up. Not wanting to be apart from each other you both agree to a shared shower in which you both help clean the other and wash their hair. Once your out and dried off you find yourself and Nat some pajamas and as soon as your both dressed she's dragging you back over to the bed for cuddles
   You both stay there the rest of the evening and into the night, sharing conversations as the tv plays quietly in the background. But eventually she drifts off to sleep in your arms so you just hold her a while longer before tucking you both into bed.
   When you wake up the next morning you find her still nestled beside you with her arms now wrapped around your midsection. And you smile at the fact that your bed is warm. Just as it should be.
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imagine--if · 11 months ago
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══⋆✰* Dating Cha Hyun-Su Includes: *✰⋆══
A/N: In honour of the second season of Sweet Home, this was mandatoryyyy 😁 just started off with some relationship hcs first but feel free to send some imagine or other headcanon requests through my inbox for Sweet Home characters if you're into it! These headcanons cover season one and two. Enjoy reading 🖤
Warnings: Sweet Home series spoilers, mentions of violence
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🩸• Starting from the beginning of this monstrous series of events, the most likely way you'll meet Hyun Su is at Green Home a bit before the monster outbreak and apocalypse comes along. All you'll see of the quiet, sullen young man is his weary, unfocused gaze that briefly trails up from the ground to glance up at you in acknowledgement as he bumps into you somehow while moving into his apartment in the complex. The only sign of his interest in you from first looks is his stare lingering for just a beat longer than he'd usually bother... and that's about it. Boy's too shy and broken and tired to feel like he's good enough to do much else, let alone have a shot at even being friends with someone like you, so he'll just admire you from afar every once in a while and leave you to live your life while he despises his.
🩸• HoWeVeRrR-
🩸• The apocalypse unleashes its hell before much else can happen, and before you know it, you two are out surviving in a ruined world riddled with horrifying monsters and mutations, hiding out inside Green Home as you form the group together with the rest and try to fight off the monsters inside the building along with it infecting and warping others into gruesome, inhumane figures.
🩸• This boy's absolutely damaged and drained from all he's been through before moving to Green Home, and so it takes a lot of energy for him to slowly, slowly break out of his shell and reach out to you in return. But he will. He just needs time and patience, and Hyun-Su will find himself making the tiniest amount of small talk when you're together with the rest of the surviving group in the apartment complex. Or, most likely, it'll be him giving you most of his food when you're eating by silently and gently pushing it over to you, no eye contact, no words.
🩸• Before you, he didn't have the slightest will or reason to live, and so the only idea he can think up while dragging himself around the wreck of Green Home along with the rest of the group of survivors is to follow you around and protect you. The way he wants to die is for you, shoving himself into the way of the monster or whatever else the danger is to take him instead. Hyun-Su's absolutely fine with that idea...
🩸• Until he starts falling in loveee- 😏🖤
🩸• Everyone gets used to the sight of this boy following around after you like a moon-eyed puppy, having a tall, slightly dropping shadow trailing behind your own whenever you go somewhere to find food or weapons or whatever you've been sent to find. From Season One, where Lee Eun-Hyuk tries forcing him to do everything and using his monster side as an advantage, if it involves steering clear of you or putting you in any danger, boy's had enough. Hyun-Su will defend himself in his own quiet but intense way, his dark glare bleeding into Eun-Hyuk's with a few mumbling words of a threat before he wanders off to find you again.
🩸• Hyun-Su does consider trying to completely leave you alone, since everyone's aware that he's dangerous with his monster brimming to the surface from inside of him and his other symptoms and dangerous instability being infected, but it feels like the worst form of torture. He's alone again, in a world grimmer than the last, and he has no idea what to do with himself except feel like crying and telling you everything about everything when you sit by him and ask him if he's doing alright.
🩸• I think that this guy would be mega touch-starved after living in isolation for so long after all the bullying and tragedies with his family, so having you as a comforting voice of reason and warmth is something he can't help but melt into after you've been unspoken friends during the apocalypse and doesn't have the fight left in him to reject you if you try to clean bloodstains and patch up his wounds after a nasty confrontation. After that, it's safe to say that out of the whole group of survivors together in Green Home, he'll always be naturally apprehensive and distrusting towards them all, but if it's you that's trying to point something out or is worried about something; let him go get his weapon, he's coming with you.
🩸• His general aim and instinct is to protect good people and be some source of help and comfort that's been so unfamiliar to him personally, but with you, instinct is boosted 10000000% because it's you. You're too good for this world, way too good for him, and if you die, he dies. This concept basically becomes something Hyun Su isn't even fully aware of until the point where you might almost die somehow being confronted by monsters with the others, which is where you'll witness himself having a full-on freak-out in his mind and using all his strength and darker, monstrous side to come out on top to save your life.
🩸• After the danger's gone and you're alone in a quiet room to recover and process what happened, that's all the time you need to make it official, hugging him tightly and thanking him, while Hyun-Su shakily pats your back in return before giving up and hugging you back equally as tightly, staying in a protected embrace as long as time will let you.
🩸• There's so much raw love and trust and protection in a relationship with Hyun-Su, it's unbelievable 😭 he's so clingy and sweet and ridiculously romantic in private with you until you point it out, which results in a blushing red sight and not being able to look you in the eye in bashfulness for about a straight hour before he gets over it. In public, it's still obvious that you're together, with smaller signs of affection and togetherness like holding hands, or doing that coupley thing where you whisper together in the back corners of rooms or give each other brief, subtle looks that say everything you need to understand what it means and where to run or go or something.
🩸• At first, he is a little reluctant to get too close to you because of that lingering fear of accidentally hurting you or his monster side popping out to ruin everything, but with some time and small steps, he'll eventually give up trying to be overly cautious and let him be wholly soothed by you, which was the biggest relief of all for him.
🩸• But just as you're getting properly closer and in touch with each other as romantic partners as well as best friends and survivors in this mess together, his monster alter ego personality will find it the perfect time to mess around with his head and find a way to overpower Hyun-Su, meeting you properly in the process.
🩸• Now, his monster side is a whole other story when it comes to personality, but if you think that means you'll be left alone or hated or something, think AgAiN, and then again, because no :)
🩸• Hyun-Su's monstrous side is darker, daring, dangerous, and with you, madly possessive and protective. I mean, he won't even try to hold himself back from taking things to extremes and spilling as much blood as necessary if he gets a weird vibe from someone around you, or if someone outrightly tries to attack you. Even if it's a monster like him, there's enough threat in thrashing them through a few solid walls and leaving some biting words behind before stalking off.
🩸• Monster Hyun-Su's a massive starer by the way, so those unnervingly blue eyes are going to be a sight you'll have to get used to, like literal inches away from your face when you wake up, studying you for wounds, or just studying you in general. There's something about you that's just so fascinating to him, and this side of him literally does not know what boundaries are, so he's all up in your face studying you in curiosity with a soft but dark smirk on his face, while you're just "😐"
🩸• Kind of gross but Monster Hyun-Su has the weirdest affection ever. Like, he enjoys feeding you when you're hungry, mostly questionably bloody-looking things until you get it in his head that you're not Hannibal Lecter and just want a breakfast bar or something 😭 and when this guy goes to hug you, it'll be ridiculously tight, sometimes his wing breaking out of its shell to wrap over you, which is kind of sweet. Until he goes to kiss you and it's not a kiss at all, it's more him living up to his monstrous reputation by licking at your skin like some kind of dog until you squeal and push him away, which he always finds hilarious. Meanwhile, normal Hyun-Su's mortified 😂
🩸• Normal Hyun-Su and Monstrous will most likely make an agreement between them to make sure you're kept alive and as unharmed as possible, protect you from any sort of danger, so if you thought you had a shadow following after you before the split between them, you've got a much more threatening one now, so it'd be very hard for much damage to come to you at all. And good luck if you want some time alone to wander and think by yourself, because if he doesn't straight-up follow you out with no buts like usual, he'll be watching you somewhere close at all times.
🩸• I feel like Hyun-Su's monstrous side would find it funny to make you jump, like falling down out of nowhere from a building or something right in front of you when you thought you were alone or something stupid like that. You'll give him an annoyed glare of protest, and he'll just smirk smugly and teasingly with a fake-innocent shrug of "something wrong?"
🩸• To sum up the whole. predicament you've gotten yourself into here, falling in love with Hyun-Su would pretty much protect you from ninety per cent of the apocalyptic mess of the world while being showered with all the lost love and affection and longing he thought were dead along with all the rest of his hopes and energy from the beginning. And then to keep you on your toes, you've got the monstrosity inside of his head coming out at random moments to obsess over you before Hyun-Su can come back to reality again. But whoever's at the surface, and wherever you two are, he'll always, always be there watching you and with you, one way or another.
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endless-ineffabilities · 4 months ago
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Chemical Override (bonus chapter)
Ewan Mitchell x actress!reader
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a/n: surprise! Something to tide you guys over until the heart-wrencher that is part five!! Y'know, gotta have some laughs before everything blows up 💣 or something like that :)
previous chapter ▪︎ series masterlist ▪︎ main masterlist
What happens when your castmates decide to have a drinking game based on yours and Ewan's interviews? Chaos. Absolute chaos.
"Is it just me or does my head look abnormally large in this?" comes Tom's query as they sit on the floor around the low table in Phia's living room.
Phia, Tom, and Olivia are snug on the carpet, legs strewn in varying postions, their attention on the laptop on the table.
"No, just you, mate," Phia responds.
"Nah, look at 'im," Olivia counters, "Looking like a right old egghead."
"I knew it," Tom clicks his tongue, smiling at the jab.
The friends were just having a nice time catching up in Phia's apartment, and after several coffees and rolled cigarettes, they found themselves nestled on the floor, beers in hand.
Someone made a suggestion to check up on the interviews being released as part of the media rollout. And so they watched the cast's interviews, already having done with the one from Wired, MTV, and the Buzzfeed Puppy Interview.
"I loved those pups," Olivia remarked jokingly. "But they didn't love me back. Story of my life."
"Oh, I love you, Liv!" Phia had exclaimed, pulling her friend in for a hug.
"Aaanyway," Phia says, reaching forward and scrolling through the suggested videos, "how about this one next! I miss those two." She clicks on an interview you and Ewan had done together, in that long press day where you guys were paired by the media team.
"They look adorable, don't they?" Tom says. "Here's to hoping the lad's finally made a bloody move."
"What about the goss on that girl you all were with? The one at the pub?" Olivia curiously asks, not kept in the loop due to her holiday abroad.
"All bull. You know how the tabloids are. She was sweet and everything but Ewan was practically side-eyeing her all the way into oblivion when she kept clinging on his arm. Poor girl." Tom smirks, the memory still fresh in his mind.
"Awww, look! Ewan's looking at her all gooey-eyed. Even then!" Phia simpers, leaning against Olivia.
"Of course, I was extremely excited and nervous to join the cast for season two," you can be heard saying, "being a huge fan of the book and the first season... I mean, it was such a tall order for me to step into this world but you know - "
"She did it so flawlessly," Ewan says to the interviewer. "We were so lucky to have her join the show."
"Oh, come on," you can't help but blush and shake your head. "Everyone was so welcoming, really."
"Well, it's safe to say that the audience loves your character!" the interviewer says kindly.
"Thank you so much, I'm glad to hear that," you beam in return.
"What a character, indeed," Ewan says, looking at you again.
Tom giggles, swinging his beer, "The look on his face, oh my days! Ewan is whi-ipped, I'm telling you. Just look at those stars in his eyes, you'd think she's an angel or somethin."
"She is an angel," Phia muses.
"Lovely girl," Olivia agrees.
"Oh!" Tom sits upright suddenly, leaning forward on his knees, "How about this? They've got a couple interviews up, right? Drinking game then, shall we? A shot each time Ewan looks at her or pays her a compliment!"
Olivia laughs nervously, but she's more than game to participate. "A swig of beer or... "
"Nah!" Tom scrunches his face in response. "Say, Phi, have you got vodka or tequila or whatever?"
"I... think I've got some leftover tequila," she ponders. "Are you proposing a shot of tequila every time Ewan fawns over her? Isn't that a bit dangerous? Should we stick to beer?"
"It'll be fun," Tom reassures, already getting on his feet to fetch the bottle from the kitchen. "Ewan's a professional," he says, when he returns with tequila and three shot glasses. "Surely he maintained his focus during all of that. Can't be more than - what, three or four shots each?"
Oh, how wrong he is.
It only takes another interview for them to realise that they might have been overzealous in taking on the challenge.
Most Likely To with the cast of House of the Dragon, the screen displays. You and Ewan pop up in intervals, and they eagerly await your clips with shots in hand.
"Most likely to be late on set?" you say, raising your hands when you answer with, "I'm happy to say that it was not me."
"No?" Ewan asks.
"Nope, early each day," you smile at him.
"I believe you, I mean, I wish we actually had scenes together," Ewan says, smiling right back, eyes lingering on you when you add something more to your answer.
"Shot!" Tom exclaims. The trio's faces crunch up when the burning liquid slides down their throats.
"Fuck's sake," Olivia mutters. "Ewan better keep his googly eyes to himself."
"Don't get your hopes up," Phia says, knowing the both of you well.
"Most likely to accidentally date a serial killer? What the hell is this question?" Ewan snorts, eyebrows shooting up.
"Are we even in the right show for this?" you joke, and Ewan laughs harder, his hand finding your forearm and squeezing briefly.
"Shot, I suppose," Phia mumbles. "I mean, look at his face, the sweetheart."
Another round, and everyone feels warmer and more lightheaded.
"Wouldn't be me, I don't know about you?" you ask Ewan.
"Oh, I wouldn't. I don't think Aemond would either, he would see right through that."
"Next, most likely to show up in a stunning outfit," you read from the prompts off-camera.
"Hmm," Ewan muses, "I would say maybe Liv Cooke... she's had really good outfits on the carpet lately..."
"I agree," you nod enthusiastically. "Liv's killing it."
"And you, definitely," Ewan turns to you again. "I mean, stunning would be an understatement."
"Shot!" Olivia half-yells. "And bless her, look! She's turned all red from Ewan's flirting."
"Thanks, mate," you say, tilting your head at him. "You as well! Your stylists have outdone themselves this press tour, for sure."
"Half a shot cause she gives something his way?" Tom suggests, comically shrugging. By the end of the video, the group had done three and a half rounds of shots, all growing redder in the face, their laughter turning unhinged.
"I'm actually scared to do another interview," Olivia groans. "Can those two just shag each other already? Goodness!"
"Who knows? Maybe they have? Would be about time," Tom cheekily says, ever the agent of chaos.
"Ewan did fly out to see her," Phia nods. "They're both in America right now, my darlings."
"Another interview!" Tom gets to clicking, landing on the one you and Ewan did with Rotten Tomatoes.
"We ask everyone this question - can you tell me your favourite movie from this year?" is what the interviewer starts with.
"That's a good question," Ewan says. "Uhhmm, well, it isn't from this year I think but her film - " he gestures to you, " - is one of my all-time favourites. I think it came out late last year, if I'm not mistaken?" He looks to you for confirmation, and your flustered self manages to hum a response. "I just think the whole film was brilliant. It definitely showcases her talents and solidifies her as one to watch."
"Oh, for fuck's sake," Tom sighs, and they all bring the shot glasses back to their lips.
"Guys, I might pass out by the end of this." Olivia stands to fetch herself a glass of water. "Ewan's a menace!" she calls out from the kitchen.
"We shouldn't have done this," Tom shakes his head.
"You suggested it!" Phia punches his arm, laughing.
"I guess I underestimated the degree of whipped that Ewan is. That cheeky lad."
Four more rounds of shots later, and the group has their tally up to eight and a half.
Yet another interview plays on the screen, and when Ewan - with all his bloody audacity - pushes a lock of hair away from your face on camera, Tom's eyes nearly bulge right out of his head.
"Oh my god!" he cries out. "He's trying to kill us! I think I'm actually going to puke."
"I quit." Olivia slumps against the base of the velvet couch. "I can't drink any more. Ewan wins."
Phia giggles at the screen, at the sight of her two dear friends slowly but surely falling in love right before the audience's eyes. In some show of celebration, she takes another shot, the last player left in the game.
▪︎ ▪︎ ▪︎
Meanwhile across the Atlantic...
"Hey, darling," you hear Ewan's voice on the other line. "I just settled in my hotel in New York."
"That's good! Did your flight go well?"
"Mhmm, my meeting's tomorrow afternoon so I've got time to prepare," he takes a breath, before softly saying, "I miss you."
You laugh, "So you keep telling me, Mitchell."
"We're still on that huh, darling? Shouldn't you be calling me something more... personal, by now?"
"Like what?"
"I don't know, you tell me."
"Well... the internet does call you their babygirl."
"Oh come on," he complains, smiling nevertheless.
"What is it, babygirl?"
"That's how you want to play it, bunny?"
"Ewan!" you groan. "Okay, okay."
"Anyway, darling," he says. "I really do miss you. I can't wait to see you again.'
The longing is clear in his voice and it tugs at your heart so much that you need to pause and collect yourself, before finally saying, "I miss you too, baby."
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Cheers to all of yous who voted here! Baby it is ~
In the meantime...
Update! ~ part five
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silverynight · 3 months ago
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Eight years and counting
Contains manga spoilers
The first year comes with so much planning and preparation, Katsuki barely has time to keep up with graduation and the agency interview. He's a war hero, he knows it'll be easy for him to get in any agency he wants and even though that'd make his middle school self excited, he's not that kid anymore.
He cares more about Izuku now. No, he only cares about Izuku now.
Katsuki watches closely as the last ember dies and Izuku pretends it doesn't take his last bit of hope with it; he wants Izuku to be more open with him, to tell him how he truly feels about being quirkless again, but Katsuki knows him well enough at this point to expect something like that.
But he also knows his Izuku won't be completely happy with being a UA teacher, no matter how much he loves that school. Izuku is meant to be a hero, like Katsuki. Actually, he's meant to be a hero and fight by Katsuki's side.
And Katsuki is going to make sure that dream comes true.
So he plans; Izuku needs a new suit, one that can emulate OFA to perfection because if Katsuki is going to give anything to Izuku, he's going to make sure it's absolutely perfect.
It takes a while for him to finish the design and as soon as he does, the first step is to show it to All Might. Katsuki knows he used a mecha suit during the final battle so he probably has an idea if Katsuki's design is possible or not.
"For young Midoriya?"
All Might already knows it's for Izuku, but the question is not exactly about that and Katsuki is perfectly aware of it; he can see it in the soft smile of Izuku's mentor, he can see it in the way his blue eyes shine with knowledge.
Katsuki blushes, but he doesn't look away from the former symbol of peace. He's not that middle schooler hot-heated kid anymore. He's done hiding his feelings behind anger and he's not ashamed about what he feels for Izuku. He's pretty sure All Might knows about that, he's probably waiting for a confirmation.
Katsuki nods, blush spreading down his neck.
"It'll take years to make something like that."
"I'm aware."
"And a lot of money," All Might keeps staring into his eyes, and Katsuki suddenly feels like he's being tested, but he doesn't care. He's going to get Izuku his suit no matter what. "A lot."
"I'll work hard. I can pay for it."
All Might smiles fondly at him before putting a hand on his shoulder.
"You should talk to young Midoriya."
Katsuki shakes his head with a fierce determination. He's not going to get Izuku's hopes up only to shatter them when something doesn't work. This is just an idea and he's not sure how long it'll take.
Katsuki will rather stab himself than breaking Izuku's heart.
"I can't do that. Not until it's ready."
"I'm not talking about the suit."
His cheeks are warm again as what All Might is trying to say finally sinks in.
"I will, but not yet."
***
By the second year he's already mailing the designs to All Might's friend in the US and constantly sending texts and visiting Hatsume in her new lab. She's excited about it and happy to start working on it; she's fond of Izuku too and loves challenges so Katsuki knew she'd say yes.
It takes a little bit more to convince Shield, but she agrees after reading Katsuki's long mail, that looks dangerously close to an essay about the amazing things Midoriya Izuku could achieve with it.
Maybe Izuku is right after all; he's kind of a nerd too.
She agrees to the project and assures Katsuki he can send her low amounts of money every month until the suit it's completely done. After a few weeks, both Shield and Hatsume start working together on it.
Then he contacts his former classmates, because All Might told him they'd want to know about it.
Not only they seem really excited about the project, they offer their help and tell Katsuki they'd like to give him a bit of money for the suit too.
He agrees gladly because he knows Izuku will be happy to know everyone participated in the making of the suit. Besides, he knows it's important to let people help when they can and want to.
***
He's not going to lie, the third year is harsh for him.
Between the videocalls with Shield, the visits to Hatsume and the extra hours he has to work to make more money, Katsuki barely has time to hang out with his friends, although it's not like they have much time either.
He stills sees Izuku a few times a week though because he's physically incapable of being away from him for too long. Sometimes Katsuki wonders if he has noticed, and then he remembers he's a nerd who won't recognize unconditional love even if it hit him in the face.
They talk about Izuku's students, about the UA and Katsuki's hero work; he was a bit reluctant to say anything about his job in front of the nerd at first, but he realized that Izuku genuinely gets excited and happy about Katsuki's pro hero journey.
He notices the nerd gets a bit sad sometimes, especially when he mentions their other friends, because they all are professionals now and Katsuki knows Izuku would like to share that kind of feeling with them.
It only makes Katsuki want to work even harder.
And he does, even if he ends up half dead on his couch after a very long shift; he somehow manages to wake up early next morning with Izuku's dream in his mind.
It's enough motivation to keep him going.
However, his body does get tired and it shows sometimes in the way he acts around others; that's probably the reason why he starts snapping at annoying fans and the videos end up on Tiktok and Instagram; his hero name trends for a while, but he honestly doesn't give a fuck. He's still making money and saving people.
Although, even if he doesn't care, he knows others do.
Because of that, Aizawa starts scolding him about his public image and the way it'll affect to his current ranking.
But Katsuki doesn't care about rankings anymore; Izuku is not there to compete against for the number one spot so it's not remotely interesting to make an effort now.
He'll save that for when Izuku becomes a pro hero.
***
By the fourth year, Aizawa decides to play dirty and use Katsuki's only weakness, so he starts showing Izuku the videos of him growling at civilians.
"Kacchan!"
It's ridiculous how Izuku's sad puppy eyes and his worried expression is the only thing he needs to make Katsuki do as he pleases, but Katsuki has been acting that ridiculous since the war ended so it doesn't matter.
It's not like he's gonna stop now.
"Fine! I'll try not to punch them in the face!"
"Did you actually do that?" Izuku finally snaps his head up from the homework he's grading and looks at him with shock, concern and disbelief at the same time.
"Of course not!" He rolls his eyes. "No matter how much I want to sometimes..."
"Kacchan!"
He does behave a bit better after that and Ashido makes fun of him because of it.
Then All Might figures out he's working too much, and also uses Izuku to make Katsuki take a break.
"Are you overworking yourself, Kacchan?"
Again with the sad puppy eyes! He needs to develop a shield against them. Izuku can't keep using them like a weapon all the time.
"I'm fine!"
The nerd is even better at handling him; Izuku nods and smiles before changing the topic to one of his students (he adores them as much as they adore him) and Katsuki visibly relaxes.
Which is a huge mistake.
"When's your next day off, Kacchan?" Izuku casually asks three days later. He smiles sweetly at him and Katsuki wonders for a moment if he actually knows how much power he has over him. "I would like you to stay over at my apartment someday. We can watch a movie and order takeout!"
"You mean like a... sleepover?" he clears his throat, cheeks turning slightly pink. He crosses his arms over his chest as a shield because he doesn't want to think of any of his multiple daydreams about spending a night with Izuku. It's too dangerous.
"Yes!"
It's not fair. Izuku looks so excited he basically has stars in his eyes as he looks up at Katsuki.
The next thing he knows is that he's asking Hawks for a day off and the whole agency starts gossiping about it because he hasn't taken one of those in years.
Only when he's sitting on Izuku's couch, completely relaxed and happy, it occurs to him it was a trap to make him take a break. And even though he knows now, he keeps falling for it every single time.
Because he can't say 'No' to Izuku.
***
Izuku's gauntlets are completely ready five years after Katsuki designed them. They look exactly like the ones he used before, but they have OFA's puch power and release energy threads he can use as he did with Blackwhip.
They're perfect.
Katsuki stares at them for a moment with a stupid, fond smile on his face and he decides to do something sentimental and even more stupid because he's an idiot.
"Can you change mines?" He asks Hatsume after a while. "I want them to look like Izuku's."
"You want them to match your boyfriend's?" She says so casually that Katsuki realizes she's been thinking of Izuku and him as a couple for a long time now. "Sure! He'll probably love that too!"
Katsuki can tell her she's mistaken, but he doesn't. Instead, he thinks about how it'll look when Izuku finally wears his hero suit and stands next to him.
His grin becomes even wider.
Izuku tears up when he sees Katsuki for the first time wearing his new gauntlets; he immediately recognizes the design, even though they're a different color.
He doesn't ask why Katsuki decided to change his gauntlets, he just walks towards him and pulls him into a tight hug.
"It... it doesn't bother you?" He's so drunk in Izuku's scent and physical closeness, his voice shakes a bit. Katsuki hadn't realized how starved he was for Izuku's touch until that moment. "I mean, are you okay with them looking almost like the ones you used to wear?"
The last thing he wants is to make Izuku upset with his own need to feel close to him, even if it's something stupid like making his gauntlets match his.
Izuku shakes his head, smiling up at him.
"I think it's really sweet."
Blushing to the tip of his ears and making Izuku giggle in the process, Katsuki realizes how much he has changed over the past years.
He's a completely different person from who he was in elementary, middle and even the first year of high-school.
The old Bakugo was made of various layers of anger issues and insecurities that were falling off of him as he grew as a person, leaving only Bakugo Kacchan in their place.
He's Izuku's Kacchan now. The version of himself that was born the moment he met little Izuku and wanted to be a pro hero with him; he's always been Izuku's Kacchan.
And he's mature enough to admit and embrace that now.
***
It's the second time, in years, his parents pay him a visit; Katsuki has been avoiding that moment as much as he could, going to their house instead, but his mother probably got suspicious and decided to find out what was going on by herself.
She takes a look around and quirks up a brow at him, even though Katsuki is doing everything in his power to ignore her.
He focuses on his Dad instead, but Masaru has a terrible poker face so Katsuki can tell he's noticed his son lives exactly the way he did when he started working as a pro hero.
"You haven't redecorated the place yet, huh?" he offers kindly, prompting Katsuki to roll his eyes.
He's aware of what's coming. It doesn't matter how much his Dad tries to dismiss the subject because he knows his son doesn't want to talk about it.
But Bakugo Mitsuki doesn't like that type of approach.
"Why do you still live in this crappy ass apartment?" There it goes. His mother crosses both arms over her chest and Katsuki knows she will not leave until he gives her a good explanation. "I thought you made good money! It's been years, brat! Don't tell me you somehow got attached to this place?"
Katsuki pinches the bridge of his nose, takes a deep breath, sits both his parents on the couch and offers them tea as he start explaining everything to them.
By the time he's done he looks up only to find them staring back at him with a very proud smile on both their faces.
Masaru hugs him before his mother starts ruffling his hair in a way she hasn't done since Katsuki was in elementary.
"He's going to love it," his father assures him; a little bit of the weight Katsuki has been carrying over his shoulders vanishes because even though he knows Izuku, part of him was sightly afraid he wouldn't like it.
They spend the rest of the afternoon looking at Katsuki's first designs as he tells them in detail how each piece is going to work.
"We've been testing them for a while and they work quite well," he says with a satisfied smile.
"What about the measurements?" Mitsuki asks then. "If you want to keep this a secret from him, how do you plan to make this fit to his body type?"
"I know Izuku's measurements," he says with a confident smirk that quickly vanishes as soon as he watches his parents exchanging a look. "Not like that! I've know him my whole life! I know him better than anyone!"
There's an uncomfortable silence before Mitsuki shakes her head with an amused grin on her face.
"You know an engagement ring would have been way cheaper than this, right?"
"Shut up!"
***
The UA students know him quite well now, especially Izuku's students. Uraraka and Todoroki help Izuku too every now and then, but Katsuki is the only one who's always available when Izuku calls.
And no, not all the students are fond of him, especially because he plays the villain quite often and he easily defeats them in the blink of an eye.
"Don't be too hard on them, Kacchan!"
"How will they learn what a real battle looks like if I'm not, Izuku?"
After a while, Katsuki hears a couple of students calling him Midoriya-sensei's boyfriend and he doesn't correct any of them.
Then the rumor reaches social media and Katsuki doesn't bother to deny it during interviews either; he only says he doesn't like to talk about his private life, which only makes everyone think it's true.
He's being selfish and he knows it, but he doesn't care at all.
However, Izuku apparently does because he corrects his students when they call them a couple, and even though he's telling nothing but the truth, it hurts Katsuki a bit.
"What is it, Kacchan?" Izuku notices immediately of course, and looks back at him with concern. "Are you alright?"
"I'm fine," he manages to smile, reminding himself that Izuku's suit is almost done and they'll be hero partners soon.
It's all that matters.
"You're an idiot!" Ashido hits him on the back of his head as they have lunch together outside her agency; it's been years since he has actually seen her face to face, and that's the first thing she does? He shouldn't have come. "Why haven't you told him?"
Katsuki huffs, getting slightly irritated.
"We have already discussed this. If the suit is not rea–"
"Not about that!" She rolls her eyes before taking her phone and showing it to him, almost shoving it to his face. "I'm talking about this!"
It's a picture of Katsuki in his hero suit talking to Izuku; they're in the UA so one of the students must have taken it.
Katsuki doesn't need her to say anything else for him to understand what she's talking about; it's written all over his face, in the fondness of smile and the glimmer in his eyes.
He's sure out of all the pictures of pro hero Dynamight on the internet, that's the only one in which he's smiling that softly.
Because it's the only picture of him looking directly at Izuku.
"I will tell him... eventually," he mumbles in a tone that lets Ashido know he doesn't want to talk about it anymore.
Izuku needs to focus on fulfilling his dream first.
***
It's been eight years since Katsuki started this project and now that Izuku's suit is finally done, he has decided that the right person to hand it to Izuku is All Might.
"You should be there too," the man insists, giving him an encouraging smile.
Katsuki shakes his head, looking at the floor; it'd be too overwhelming for him, he's sure he'll tear up if he sees Izuku's face when he gets the suit.
He asks All Might to tell Izuku that everyone funded his suit, that they contributed the same amount to it.
The next day he's back at the agency to keep himself busy; he's about to head to his first patrol of the week when Izuku walks in, wearing his hero suit.
Katsuki chokes, blushes and almost tears up at the same time.
He looks perfect.
"Thank you, Kacchan."
The blinding smile and the happiness in his voice is what ends up undoing him, because what he realizes in that moment is that Izuku hasn't smiled so freely, so sincerely in years and Katsuki is the reason he does now.
He starts tearing up the way he did that day at the hospital, the only difference is that it's happiness what makes him so emotional this time.
Izuku takes a few steps closer and presses their foreheads together.
"Thanks for making my dreams come true."
"It wasn't just me," Katsuki manages to say, but his voice sounds choked. "Everyone-"
"I know you planned it, designed it, got everyone together to work on it and paid the most for it. All Might told me everything."
"The old man can't keep a damned secret now..."
Izuku chuckles and his laughter is music to Katsuki's ears; it's true, he doesn't care how sappy it sounds. Izuku's happy chuckle is the best kind of music to him.
Then, Izuku takes his face in his hands and makes him look down at him.
"I love you too, Kacchan."
Katsuki is sure he's dreaming; it must be getting late, he needs to wake up.
But then Izuku kisses him and the kiss is clumsy and wet, but it's perfect because it's their first and now Katsuki knows it's real.
***
He doesn't need to work extra hours now, which means he has time to help Izuku train to get used to his new suit and the quirks it comes with.
It takes him just two months to accomplish that, and another one to feel ready to apply to Hawks' agency.
"I'm ready to get a hero partner now."
"Really?" Hawks looks at him in disbelief before grinning. "Alright, I have a few suggestions..."
"I want Deku."
Hawks rolls his eyes, but doesn't look surprised in the slightest.
"At least wait for me to hire him first," Hawks continues, staring up at Katsuki with a little bit of irritation. "I just got his application."
"Well, when you do, make him my partner," he's aware that he sounds demanding and although he's not like that anymore, he can't hold back the urgency in his voice because he has waited for that moment for eight years.
"I can't," Hawks says, taking a deep breath, bracing himself for a long discussion. "Even though Deku is a war hero and I'm sure he'll become an excellent pro hero, he has to start at the bottom, like everyone else. However, if I put you with him, you'll have to endure all those boring patrols and easy missions that are given to new heroes in training."
"I know that. Just put me with him. We'll get to the top in no time."
Hawks stares at him and blinks a few times before chuckling.
"Well damn. Guess they weren't rumors after all," he smirks. "Alright. Just invite me to the wedding."
"Will do."
***
Katsuki hears Izuku ramble excitedly about being hero partners and their first patrol together in the comfort of their shared apartment, one that his mother finally approves of, although he has the feeling that she doesn't care that much about the place, but the person her son is living with.
Mitsuki has always loved Izuku.
They have breakfast, Katsuki prepares two bentos for the both of them and they head to the agency, directly to the locker room.
Even though it's not his first patrol, Katsuki notices his heart beating faster as he walks out as Dynamight, right next to Izuku wearing the suit he worked so hard for.
The suit that made their dreams come true.
"Come, Deku," he says, because he can do that now, he can offer his hand to Izuku, knowing he'll take it without hesitation and a blinding smile on his face.
They're partners now, in more ways than one.
It's been eight years to get to this point, but Katsuki know it's just the beginning for the both of them.
***
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rueclfer · 29 days ago
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heyy there can i request some more touya headcannons? i really enjoy your way of picturing him because it’s just so canon and he’s kinda a lovely dick y’know. whatever comes to ur mind. thank u so much!!
weelll since you gave me so much freedom here r some touya as a housemate hcs ANNDD a moodboard bc i enjoy the visualization <3 since we talked abt this the other day too !! (i yapped so hard here sry sry this is so indulgent)
bakugou's and sero's version too hehe
housemates // touya todoroki
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touya hates the idea of living with a complete stranger or one of his siblings, so what other option does he have other than forcing his best friend (crush) on a lease with him?
the newfound freedom definitely puts him on his ass for a few weeks. barely sleeps. eats like shit. trash is scattered everywhere. several unpacked boxes. it stays like this until fuyumi comes over to check our the place and gives you two a hard scolding to get your shit together.
more often than not, you'd end up waking up on the couch with your legs sprawled out across his lap and his upper half leaned over the couch arm rest in deep sleep. staying up so late was probably one of his favorite things about living together. being able to talk as loud as you wanted, watch movies late into the night, look over the city from your balcony- he found solitude in existing with you.
if he wasn't already codependent before moving in together, just know his ass will be GLUED TO YOU. you'd be doing work in your room and he'd barge in and flop down on your bed without a word. maybe he'd gotten a bit too comfortable.
if he's feeling extra annoying that day, he'd bring in his guitar and amp and keep asking you to rate his riffs until you entirely give up on work and give him some attention.
is it obvious his love language is quality time? not only that, gift giving too. he's like a fucking crow.
"look what i found. it's a rock. for you."
makes him soooo giddy to see your display of the rocks, feathers, and dried up flowers he picked up for you on his walk. sometimes you'd come home and there'd be a new addition to the ever growing collection.
ofc you'd return the energy in a different way. touya will not cook for himself. ever. he eats like shit as an internal rebellion against the healthy diet he was forced upon as a kid, but you will not allow that boy to rot himself from the inside out!! he can expect several tupperwares of portioned out meals with notes attached to the lids if you know he'd be home all day by himself.
"to t <3. if you don't eat every last bite i'll find out and it'll hurt my feelings and i might combust into flames or something idk don't risk it!"
i can also imagine him holding back tears whenever you ever come into his room to hand him a bowl of cut up fruit. the first time you do it he'd be speechless like jaw dropped taken aback. has he ever felt love like this??? i think not.
despite all of the kind gestures, he's still touya todoroki. hides your keys if you annoyed him that morning by rushing him in the bathroom and makes you a few minutes late to class/work. chronic door slammer. pisses with the door wide open. no sense of privacy and do not gaf to knock. always locking himself out -> i feel strongly about this like imagine coming home after a long day and he's sitting out in the hallway with a pouty face waiting for you hehehe.
i don't think he'd realize this crush until a few months after you've moved in together. how could he when you two practically already act and bicker like an old married couple?
yes- peanut butter belongs in the fridge. no- it doesn't. stop leaving your socks everywhere. you forget to flush again. stop slamming the doors. you ate my chips, didn't you? don't lie. did you really need to put the mugs up that high? (he does it on purpose, and tightens the lid to every jar too.)
it wasn't until one late evening when he comes home to find you frantically mixing a doughy substance in a large metal bowl. you never bake, but you have your own oven now, so why not?
"god, finally. help me, my arms hurt." you groan, shoving the bowl in his hands. "i think i fucked up."
he sees the hurricane aftermath of your kitchen- flour everywhere, egg shells left on the counter, every single jar imaginable opened and scattered around. he could be teasing you about the mess, but god you looked so beautiful with that stupid wrinkle in between your eyebrows as you read over the recipe, and the streaks of flour across your pant leg from wiping your hands, and the way you swipe away the stray pieces of hair falling in your face with the back of your hand- oh fuck.
he thinks he's falling in love with you.
he swallows it, but he starts acting kinda weird around the apartment.
like he's.... avoiding you?
living with his best friend whom he just so happens to develop a crush for, would eat him alive. he locks himself in his room and chain smoke out his window while he's stressing the fuck out. he told you he'd stop smoking, but he's sure you'd understand the need for it right now. he hopes you can't smell it.
i also think he'd be a stress cleaner lmaaoo he cannot sit still with his thoughts for too long, so the headphones are ON and blasting and he'll definitely use that as a scapegoat + the loud ass vacuum for ignoring you if you try to talk to him while he's on this cleaning frenzy.
you think he's sick LMAO imagine the pain he feels when you come knocking on his door and calling out that you're leaving a bowl of soup and cough medicine outside his door for him. he doesn't tell you that yeah he's sick but *not in that way*
lovesick. that boy is lovesick!!!!!!
how do you avoid your housemate while you figure out how to control your feelings?
he confesses via note that he leaves on the kitchen counter. really simple tbh nothing too extravagant, but he signs off by telling you that he's staying crashing at fuyumi's for a couple days.
you text him a string of obscenities to get his ass back home and he does (he's scared of you).
he CAANNOOTT talk about his feelings in an adult way. he is sitting on the complete opposite side of the couch, twiddling his thumbs, and staring down at his feet like a child while you reread his confession note out loud to him. you find his discomfort hilarious but endearing. he finds you unbearably insufferable.
jesus the amount of times in that apartment where he would storm off to his room whenever you two got in an argument or you pissed him off...old habits die hard, you guess, because this isn't the todoroki household anymore and you aren't scared to lose that deposit and kick a door down.
once you corner him and get him to open up about his feelings the air in the room suddenly shift!! the clouds are clearing and the sun is shining woooowww look at what good communication can do.
sharing an apartment with your BOYFRIEND is no different than sharing one with your best friend. i think he'd like to keep your separate bedrooms to have your own space, but you'll rarely sleep apart.
so! many! new! traditions!
helping him dye his hair on the first saturday of every month. biweekly horror movie marathons. counting the communal piggy bank ever couple months. trying new takeout spots until you find THE spot for every category- chinese, pizza, ramen, etc etc.
and finally, an everlasting mark on your first apartment together: a small carved out heart around your initials left on the inner corner of a kitchen cabinet done with his pocket knife on a random weekday evening while you two are cooking dinner together.
-
touya tag: @moonchild701 @kaldurahms-lover @themultifandomgirl @devilslittlehelper @porusuniverse @ratatellie @katbug37 @ggriwm
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lyrefromthesea · 4 months ago
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Since you lost your list of requests, I'll write mine again 😅. how hashiras would punish reader if they get on their nerves/make them jealous/disappointed them/etc.
Male Hashira x Reader - the punishment you deserve
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pairing: Tengen x reader, Obanai x reader, Rengoku x reader, Sanemi x reader, Giyuu x reader, Gyomei x reader
content warning: slight angst?
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Tengen:
• truthfully, i think he often gets upset about the smaller things in life. the decisions made in his family of four always have to be in sync with his wants and beliefs, otherwise he could get petty.
• his punishments are unspoken, nothing he really tries to force on other people. however, after Suma, Makio, Hina and you all vote against his plans, his mood immediately drops.
• the punishment you'll receive from him will not only influence you, but his other lovers as well. he's down and nothing is as he wants. he's not happy and through little acts and petty comments, his mood will become all of your moods too.
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Obanai:
• he will ignore you. i would bet my right hand. this man will get upset over something either justified in every sense of the word or the most stupid act you'll ever see, because you can't influence it.
• don't get him wrong, he loves you and he's a gentle lover too, but not after you made his day turn out this way. Kaburamaru is not allowed on your shoulder anymore, he stays by his side or can get ignored just like you.
• he'll make a point out of seeing you enter a room and looking the other way, pretending like that wasn't fully intentional.
• however, he stops punishing you rather quickly, because he wants to spend time with you. punishing you is indirectly a punishment for him.
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Rengoku:
• i think that Rengoku and you at least share one hobby that you both love. having thrown this into the room, it'll be a thing for the two of you to spend evenings together and live out that hobby.
• he doesn't punish you often, but he has a good reason when he does. his punishments aren't meant to hurt you either, it's more like your actions made him upset.
• he cancels your little hobby dates, saying that he doesn't want to do it in this state. the way he often sadly trots away makes you swiftly follow after him, resulting in a long talk about how certain things just aren't okay.
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Sanemi:
• he's downright mean. he'll make a point out of mentioning what you did wrong every chance he gets until you apologize.
• you accidentally fall? "are you trying to make me jealous again? it's not working this time." expect that you hadn't tried to make him jealous to begin with. another person had complimented you and, like the fool you were, you blushed.
• he's a jealous man, and while he often knows how to hide it, he'll also have times to let his frustrations out in these kinds of "punishments"
• "i already said i'm sorry, Sanemi..!" your sad expression makes him pause, quietly apologizing for being rude and helping you up.
• he's jealous, not a monster.
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Giyuu:
• just like Obanai, he'll probably ignore you. however, he does it subconsciously.
• there are certain things Giyuu just doesn't like and he'll get upset seeing you do them. the unwanted feeling of anger or sadness forces him to make a quick decision. ignore you or possibly hurt you with his words.
• he'll try to avoid you until he has grown calmer, less prone to acting on his emotions. it's just that you'll feel hurt by the time he finally talks to you again.
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Gyomei:
• he's not the type for punishments, at least not for any kind of punishment that could harm you.
• i believe he only really gets upset in extreme cases like hurting other people, which you probably won't do or - the more likely scenario - when you do something reckless.
• he'll certainly tell you that he wasn't fond of your actions, not liking that you put yourself in danger.
• however, if you have an upcoming event with him, like training together, he will cancel it. it's not a punishment in his eyes, he just doesn't want you to get hurt. of course, you perceive the canceled time differently.
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tealgoat · 9 months ago
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Writing from @felikatze !!!
The Favor Tree. Not something uniquely Vaugardian, mind you. Plenty of powerful trees are strewn about Ka Bue as well, but this one *is* Vaugardian, and so you'd like to wish on one at least once, for completion's sake.
What to wish for, though? You can wish for Vaugarde to be saved, of course. But, in all likelihood, everyone in Dormont already has, so what will your wish even accomplish, then? The logical part of you wants to make it a test. Something simple to see whether these wishes have any merit to them.
If they don't, you'll save Vaugarde by your own strength. If they do, a little help goes a long way.
Right, something simple it shall be. A coin flip. You'll wish to win your next coin flip.
You clasp your hands together like Mirabelle does, close your eyes, and
"That's not how you wish, Madam!"
"...Siffrin?"
With quick strides, Siffrin catches up to her. Hadn't they meant to go later? Oh, in her dwadling, Isabeau already left.
Siffrin smiles with curiosity next to you, and you untangle your hands. "What'd you wish for?" they ask.
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"Nothing yet. After someone so rudely interrupted me." You say it with a sarcastic tilt.
Siffrin mirrors you after a beat. He looks around. "So rude! We gotta find the culprit! Oh, maybe they're hiding up in the tree. It's pretty..."
You know what's coming.
"TREE-mendous, after all!"
Despite yourself, you snort.
"So, my brave hero, if that's not how you wish, how do you do it then?"
"Uh!" Siffrin startles. "Uh!" He bends to the ground and picks up... a leaf?
"Here!" They hold the leaf out to you. You try to grab it, but they snatch it back. "No! First, pick the leaf you like best. That best represents you."
You don't know anything about Siffrin's past. Or where they're from, at all. So if he's sharing this piece of tradition... it won't hurt to humor him.
Your knees seriously don't like bending down like that. Instead of grabbing the first leaf you see, you ponder them for a little bit. Eventually, you decide on one that's a little longer than the others, with an odd bend in its tip.
"This one." You push yourself off the ground. It is. A struggle. Siffrin offers you a hand. You take it without aknowledgement. "What next?"
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Siffrin puts a hand on his chin and squints, as he does when forgetting something. What, did they forget in the middle of showing her?
No, Siffrin proceeds by instinct. They bring the leaf up to their mouth and whisper far too softly for Odile's aging ears. Then, he folds the leaf and lets it go.
It drifts on the wind, higher and higher, until it disappears into the trees.
"There. Whisper your wish into it three times, fold it, and let it go."
"I've never seen a Vaugardian do that."
Siffrin seems lost. "It's not... It's..."
You drop the subject. "Why thrice?"
"That's just... the way to do it? You can also do six and nine, I think, and seven and thirteen."
"Multiples of three and prime numbers?"
"Prime numbers?"
"Forget it. Alright."
You hold the leaf to your face, curling it to speak into. A simple, logical wish, to test the Favor Tree. That'd seems rude now, after Siffrin shared part of his culture with you.
Something better. Something... genuine. And that's the hard part, isn't it? You have a reputation to uphold. It's easier that way. Like... like you don't care how much Siffrin's eye sparkles right now, waiting with bated breath.
It'll be easier to leave them again. Bonnie will go to their sister, Isabeau to the Defenders, Mirabelle to the House, and Siffrin...
Siffrin is a traveler too, is he not? Maybe the others won't go with you, but you could show them Ka Bue. Teach them how to pray at shrines, about all the different foods you ache for, all the culture you left to find something new. Despite it all, Ka Bue was your home, and... you'd like to share it with them, if you can.
Ah, you just want to stay with them.
You fold the leaf, and it leaves on the breeze.
"Hah."
"Madame?"
"You're rubbing off on me, Siffrin."
You pat them on the shoulder. Siffrin freezes. Until your hand leaves them again.
"My apologies, Siffrin."
It's quite silly to think they'd go with you after all.
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luveline · 1 year ago
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how about some domestic stuff of post-prison reid and stripper!reader??? that one fic broke my heart in the best way
Prison changes a lot of things about Spencer, so when you get back to his place after a quick run to the grocery store and find him packing away some of his things into boxes, you're not alarmed. “Spring cleaning?” you ask, stepping around him carefully where he's kneeling by the TV stand. 
“Making room,” he says. 
He must have bought something. You put your tote bag in the crook of your arm and bend a touch to kiss his cheek, his hair brushing your face. “You have so many things, Spence, you need a storage locker. You need two.” 
He feels blindly up your arm. 
You put the groceries away, wash your hands, and cut some veggies. You season them and put them in the oven to roast, calling Spencer to see what he wants with it. “You could have the leftover chicken, or I can make, like… anything you want, actually. Pork chops, or maybe forget that and we'll have pasta, I can frankenstein the– Hey, Spence? You listening?” 
You're not mad. He's always been prone to deep thought, but usually he isn't looking straight at you while you talk. “Spencer?” 
“You'll move in with me, right? If I ask?” 
You wring your hands. “You've asked me a hundred times.” 
“But this time, you'll say yes.” He's staring at you. He already knows. 
“You can at least pretend to ask me.” 
Spencer closes the box in front of him. “Please, move in with me. I can't spend that long away from you ever again.” 
“You see me almost every day when you're not working.” 
He shrugs, smiles. “It's not enough.” 
You sit on the couch. He leans over his box to hold your leg. Spencer's asked you a bunch of times, first because he worried about your safety, then because he felt it was a good option as his friend, and then again because he loved you. And you always said no because you didn't want to depend on him, and because some nagging voice in the back of your mind kept telling you he'd realise he didn't want you as soon as you got close enough. But it's been a long time since you thought that way, and his stint in prison emphasised how badly you need each other. 
“So, it'll be equal?” you ask in answer. 
“I'm not saying that. The rent is ridiculous, and you didn't sign up for that, and I have no idea where we'll put all your clothes. But it'll be half yours, absolutely.” He looks especially happy though apprehensive; he hasn't realised you don't need convincing this time.
“I want to bring my pink lamp for the bedroom.”
Spencer's smile changes his entire face. Puppy dog eyes turn thinner, his lips part, his perfect teeth like pearls. “I want you to bring the pink lamp. Bring everything. No one will ever understand our decor.” 
You sink down on the floor in front of him and nudge aside his box for a hug. He gives it to you, and, in a slightly uncharacteristic move for him, he cuts the embrace short to kiss you soundly, his hand on your cheek. He kisses you again and again until you're laughing into his mouth. 
“Does this mean you'll let me propose?” he asks softly. 
Your breath catches. He doesn't sound particularly put together himself, bringing his second hand to your face, holding your forehead to this. 
“I don't think it's something I have much choice in,” you say eventually, your smile audible and immovable. 
You get to say yes or no, but his wanting to ask is all on him. He's flustered you unexpectedly, and the quiet laugh coming from what feels to be the deepest recess of his chest tips you over. You dip down into his neck slowly, hiding away in the curve of his shoulder as his arms come heavy behind you. 
“All I could think was how much stuff I didn't get to say to you, or do with you,” he says. “If they couldn't clear my name, I kept thinking about how much time I wouldn't get back.” 
You breathe out in a rush against his neck. “But you're out.” 
“Yeah. I am.” He strokes your back. “Lucky me.” 
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harzilla · 2 months ago
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Original post found here. https://www.tumblr.com/harzilla/760718001365549056/ohh-brain-rot-time-long-lost-sibling-au-except
Expanding on the idea. I want to thank @achromaticbibliophile for a lot of these ideas
Riddle and Yuu growing up in complete opposite lives. Riddle under strict parentage while Yuu grows up in a family similar to the Robinson's in Meet the Robinson's. A chaotic but loving family that sees failure not as a bad thing, but as a way to learn. Who finds a baby on their doorstep and adopts without hesitation. The two butting heads at first. Until the truth of Yuu being Riddle's sibling is revealed. Perhaps Yuu's hair is platinum blonde or even white. Perhaps Riddle is the Red Queen to Yuu's White Queen. Riddle who is introduced to Yuu's adopted family and it's all so chaotic, dinner nearly a food fight and afterwards he's brought into the kitchen to help make the dessert. Messing it up and he thinks it'll be another oyster sauce incident. But instead everybody cheers and ohh. It's actually okay. Yuu and him sharing the story of him messing up the tart after his overblot The family turns it into a silly joke. The dessert is missing something, why not oyster sauce? The family, having a contest to see who can create the weirdest dessert, and Riddle winning by making a traditional Queendom of Roses star gazey pie. Riddle, who finds himself laughing along with the rest of the family. Welcome to the family Riddle.
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Leona, who has always been the unfavored. Who is brought to meet Yuu's adoptive parents. Leona, who had to convince Falena not to come but instead sends a note thanking the parents for raising the third Kingscholar child. Yuu's parents shocked to see their lost child come home sporting ears and a tail and bringing home a brother. Leona, who finds himself at ease when they ask him about his aspirations, his plans for the future, he's just Leona to them.
Jade and Floyd. Who grew up with a mother who was always worried about them. Eventually learning about a third eelver who was lost to the tides. One day a kid runs up to their parents with a baby wrapped in a towel. The adults panic but the couple eventually adopt the child. Yuu who doesn't have a clue until the day they go to the coral sea to retrieve the photo and transform into an eel mer. Jade immediately separating Yuu and bombarding them with questions while Floyd keeps the others away. Jade and Floyd who drag Yuu back to NRC.
J&F: Found our lost sibling.
Azul: What?
J&F: *dumping them into a tank* Found our lost sibling.
Rollo, who hates magic. Magic lost him not one but two siblings. Rollo, who plans to rid the world of magic. The masquerade invitation to NRC. Rollo, who is shocked when the previously uninvited Prefect looks strikingly similar to himself and his deceased brother. Perhaps he sees Yuu as an even bigger motivator for his plans. Magic took his siblings from him, and if he destroys it, then magic can never take Yuu from him again. Yuu who at the end tells him that yes, magic may have separated them but magic also brought them back together and perhaps magic may allow him to see the world they grew up in.
Malleus' was expanded on a lot and is practically a fanfic in onto itself.
This idea is actually thanks to @kitsun369
The Spade family, a set of baby paternal twins. One that looks like their father, and the other who looks like their mother Dilla. The parents separate after a particularly nasty divorce. Only for the baby with dad to disappear after their father is attacked and injured. The parents, but especially Dilla spend years mourning the loss of one child. One day, Deuce overhears his mom on the phone crying to his grandmother because she's afraid something will happen to Deuce if he doesn't get on the right path. She's already mourned one child. She can't bare to mourn another. That day Deuce decides to turn his life around, he never wants to see his mom cry like that again.
Deuce who becomes friends with the prefect. They're like peas in a pod. They're each other's biggest supporters. The day they go to the White Rabbit festival and Deuce introduces his mom to Yuu, she's shocked because this child is practically the spitting image of her ex-husband when he was that young, even down to the same hair color. She doesn't want to get her hopes up but could it be?
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no-phrogs-in-hats · 4 months ago
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Addison Montgomery x fem! Reader
Could I please have an imagine where the reader is Meredith’s childhood best friend that came to work at Seattle Grace with her. While Meredith is pining for McDreamy her best friend wants McDreamy’s wife. (Imagine all of the hilarious and awkward moments this would result in).
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Hi! I couldn't figure out how to turn this into a oneshot, so I just gave you a shit ton few scenarios!!
Sitting at lunch and getting the whole McDreamy situation out of Meredith and Cristina and Izzie spilling more to you than Meredith
Standing at the nurses station with MAGIC and Addison is on the other side of the station filling out a chart
She has her glasses on.
And her white coat.
And she's wearing black heels with a nice professional dress.
Mommy.
And you can't take your eyes off of her and you lean into Meredith and ask, "Who is that?"
She responds, "McDreamy's wife."
"So, is she into the whole adultery thing too?"
Cristina chimes in, "Considering that's why they seperated, I'd say so."
You can't stop thinking about McMommy Addison for weeks
Then, you're assigned to a case with her.
You get incredibly involved with your patients
Addison admires you so much for it.
"The world needs more doctors like you," she says after a crash C-section.
You ask, "And what do I have?"
"Empathy. You don't see very many doctors who want to get to know their patients. Most of them just see them as something they can cut into."
You're on her service almost every day for the next few months.
Asking Dr. Bailey, "Can't I have another assignment?"
Her responding, "Dr. Montgomery-Shepherd asked for you specifically, take it up with her."
But you didn't want to take it up with her.
At lunch, George brings it up and you say, "Meh, I don't really mind it."
But you start blushing.
And Cristina and Meredith start teasing you.
"Oh, she's got a crush on McDreamy's wife."
"George says, You can't have a crush on her, she's married."
"So is Derek and I still slept with him."
Cristina grins, "No wonder she has you on her service every day. You're her little bitch."
You insist that it's not true.
They continue teasing you until your pager goes off.
"Aw, is it Addison?"
"Give her a kiss for us!"
They continue making kissy faces the entire time you leave.
The first time you two kiss it's after you lost an OB patient.
Both of your emotions are running high.
You're trying to calm yourself down in an on-call room
She comes in and tries to comfort you
"It'll be okay."
"How are you so calm about this?"
"Well, eventually, you learn how to cope. You'll never get used to it, but you'll learn how to cope."
You lift your head off her shoulder and look at her in the eyes
Then your eyes flicker to her lips
And hers do the same
You finally give in and press your lips to hers
She returns the kiss and suddenly both of your scrubs are on the floor
Months of longing looks and pining and private moments in the elevator, you want to make your relationship official, but you know you can't
You're both in an on-call room once again making out
You pull away quickly and stop her
"Addison we shouldn't be doing this"
"What do you mean?"
"You...Addison, you're still married. And until you file for divorce, I can't see you."
She's speechless.
You, Addison, Derek, and Meredith all end up in an elevator together.
But weeks later, she presents divorce papers to Derek
And just a week after that, she shows you the signed papers
You don't know what to say.
"You actually did it? You filed for divorce?"
"I've made a lot of mistakes in my life...but you...you're not one of them."
This is the first time she says 'I love you'.
She gets a nice hotel room for you two that night.
Meredith asks why you aren't going home with them and then it dawns on her
You see that shit eating grin
Izzie and George and Cristina start cooing at you
"Awww, you're officially Addison's bitch."
"I am not Addison's bitch!"
"You so are!
"You'd do anything for her!"
"...Okay, fine, so I'm her bitch."
And it turned out to be a very lovely night.
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blackhairedjjun · 10 months ago
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rebound and restoration
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pairing: choi yeonjun x fem reader | genre / tropes: angst -> fluff, friends to lovers, post-breakup, non-idol au; ft. soobin + mentions of the rest of txt; reader is yeonjun's age (soobin calls reader "noona") | word count: 5.4k | warnings: post-breakup heartbreak, profanity, food, kissing
additional note: fic is mostly written but contains a few texts
summary: with his heart still aching after just getting dumped, yeonjun turns to you, one of his closest friends, for comfort. that is, until he kisses you - and your friendship starts to change.
author's notes: honestly i feel like if i don't post this soon i'll be dissatisfied with it forever and edit it endlessly and it'll never get past my drafts LOL perfect is the enemy of done!! anyway i wrote this while i was feeling stressed and insane during the holidays and wanted... an angsty kiss for whatever reason. lmao yeah
(support by reblogging banner by @cafekitsune)
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when yeonjun arrives at your apartment, it’s still early in the evening; the two bowls of pho you ordered for takeout are still hot, and you’ve left your laptop open at a selection of cheesy netflix rom-coms. perhaps the selection is a bit ironic, but you mused that the feel-good escapism is just what he needs.
he pulls you into a hug and you give him an extra squeeze and a few pats on the back. you can’t help but ruffle his hair a little as he pulls away. 
“hey, jjun...”
“y/n!”
“how are you feeling?”
“ah, a bit better, i think.”
he gives you a slight smile, and you’re too relieved to notice that it doesn’t quite reach his eyes. it’s a miracle to you that he’s even smiling again two weeks after his breakup. you still remember the cracks in his voice when he called you after it had happened, the rims of his eyes red with crying when he finally crashed at your place half an hour later. that night you held him tight as he told the story to you in between sobs: hana had broken up with him over a call that lasted less than a minute. she was bored and tired of him and just stopped caring, she said, if he were a toy she could throw away if she didn’t want to play with it anymore.
you swallowed back the anger in your throat back then, though you couldn’t help the tears of your own that fell. now you push the anger back down again as you lead yeonjun to the small table at your kitchenette, one of the bowls of pho steaming in front of him. now is not the time for indignation; your friend needed comfort, and it’s comfort you will give.
yeonjun’s eyes light up at the sight of the pho. your heart swells, and you don’t hold it against him when he sits down ahead of you and picks up his chopsticks, ready to dig in. in between slurps he grins like he’s just received the best present of his life. “this is so good!” he said in between mouthfuls of noodles. “it’s been way too long since i had this.”
“i know! feels like we haven’t had this in ages.”
“remember when we tried to make our own?”
“oh god, not that!” you laugh, dropping your chopsticks. “we got impatient and that broth tasted like nothing.”
“your kitchen smelled like ginger though,” yeonjun recalls with a giggle. “it was nice visiting for a while.”
“my kitchen smelled like ginger more than the actual broth, jjun.”
“maybe we can try again one of these days? and if we mess up, at least you’ll have a nice-smelling kitchen again.”
all you can do in response is laugh, and for a moment you forget that you stopped having pho nights together when hana entered his life.
he fills you in on video game night with soobin and kai, shopping with beomgyu, and his so-called revenge gym day with taehyun; he beams with pride while describing his new weight record just as much as he does when talking about managing a hard-earned victory over soobin at tekken. you laugh along with him, knowing that his friends blocked out their schedules just to comfort him for a day. and when you talk about your new project at work and the new books you bought yourself as a treat, his eyes fill with that indescribable look you’ve seen before. you can’t quite place what it is, but it reminds you of afternoon light, of summer days, of lingering hugs after a long day together.
you don’t need to ask for yeonjun to help you clear out the table and pick up the snacks you set aside for your movie, and you make no effort to resist. there are no words exchanged: he simply places all the disposable pho bowls and chopsticks together, and you reach for a clean garbage bag and put them all in. the only communication between you is a shared look and a nod.
perhaps it’s just your imagination, but that look lingers a little longer than you’re used to, and you can’t help but give him a satisfied smile.
you’ve seen him look at hana that way, too many times to count, especially during that early-dating phase when the thrill of emotions was still high. you wondered what it was like to be on the receiving end of that gaze, for yeonjun to look at you as if you were the most precious thing in the world. and you wondered if hana really was that precious 一 if she were just as precious to him as you, his best friend, if not more so.
you let yeonjun select the movie. at first you doubt your idea to present him with rom-coms, of all things, but you let out a sigh of relief when he happily chooses one of them. both of you have seen this one many times over, but you don’t mind. there’s comfort in knowing that a happy ending is guaranteed to happen.
the two of you are slouched on your couch together, the laptop balanced on a pillow between the both of you. yeonjun sits close to you, an arm around your shoulder, a gesture that he hasn’t done with you since he started dating. you let yourself lean against him (so that you can see the screen better, you tell yourself). the two of you start a running commentary on the movie 一 “why would he say that?!” “aww, they look so cute together,” “oh god, that was so stupid!” 一 and both of your laughter fills the apartment, the sound like a duet in harmony.
it’s so easy this way, you think 一 just you and your best friend in your own little corner of the world. you steal a glance at yeonjun while he’s absorbed in the final confession scene, a soft smile on his lips and his eyes gleaming with anticipation for the big kiss. a string of memories flash before you before you can help yourself.
“she said yes,” he says, his whole face flush with excitement. “she said she’ll be mine.”
his hands are on your shoulders and he gives them a gentle squeeze. “there’s no way hana can’t like you. you’re one of my best friends, i’ll make sure you get along.”
“i think hana’s mad at me,” he tells you as he fiddles with the beanie in his hands. “but don’t worry about it, we’ll talk it out, i promise.”
his head is in his hands as you sit across him from a restaurant booth. “i don’t know what i did wrong, she looked so bored through the whole date...”
you hold him close as he sobs in your arms, his whole body shaking. “sh-she said she’s... tired of me…”
“y/n?”
you snap back to reality as yeonjun glances at you, his head tilted. the ending credits of the movie have started to play. “are you okay?”
“i-i’m fine.” you reach out to touch his cheek, then hesitate. “are you okay?”
“i’m fine, y/n.” he picks up on the meaning of your words. “i know i looked really bad that night, but i’m getting better, i promise.”
“good.” your eyes meet his, and your cheeks grow warm. “we can have nights like this as many times as you want until you feel better, okay?”
“yeah, i know. i missed having nights like this, actually.”
“me too. i really liked it when we did this all the time...”
“i know. i’m sorry. hana didn’t like一”
“hey.” your hand comes up again and this time, you gently hold on to his cheek. “it doesn’t matter what she thinks anymore.”
“y/n... i’m really sorry. i feel like i neglected you, and you’ve been my friend for so long...”
tears form in his eyes, and you feel them warm against his cheek. you wipe them away with your thumb as you move closer to him. he continues to ramble as you do.
“i feel like an idiot. like a total dumbass.” the pitch of his voice begins to rise. “god, i was so convinced that hana and i were the perfect couple, that we’d be happy. i-i thought about her more than she d-did about me, y/n, and i stopped hanging out with you一 when you’ve always一”
“jjun, please don’t apologize anymore,” you say, your voice trembling. “i’ve never been mad at you over her, not even once. i just want you to feel better, okay? i... i just want to see you be yourself again.”
you want to see the yeonjun you’ve always loved.
you’ve lain awake at night wondering if he’s ever sensed your feelings for him, and if he’s ever felt the same way. on the day he told you that he and hana were officially together, you spent that night sobbing in your bed, convinced that your friend would never see you as a lover. and yet you said nothing of that night, and of other nights similar to it, because you told yourself that if hana made him happy, then you would be happy too.
and now you want more than anything to see him happy again.
yeonjun says nothing, but instead places a hand on top of the one you have resting on his cheek. you feel it trembling, but you don’t resist as he grasps your hand to intertwine his fingers with yours. he swallows hard to push back the rest of his tears, and his eyes soften. once again there’s that indescribable look of his that makes you feel light.
“y/n...”
he says your name softly, as if in reverence. his face inches closer to yours and you don’t pull away; instead you feel lighter than ever, your gaze falling to his lips as your eyes flutter shut. everything that follows feels slow, gentle; his nose brushing against yours, then your lips on his.
he kisses you slowly at first, but as you kiss him back you fill with a new fervor, wrapping your arms around his neck and letting him wrap his arms around your waist to pull your body flush against his. warmth blooms in your chest, and every movement of yours betrays your feeling: your lips moving against his, your hands making their way into his hair. you want to kiss him until the pain he feels has been replaced by the love you have for him 一 i love you, i love you, i love you.
you’re completely absorbed in him and let out a soft sigh when yeonjun snaps out of it 一 he breaks apart from you, breathing hard, eyes wide as he’s hit by what he’s just done.
“shit, y/n一” he gets off the couch, one hand running through his hair over and over again. “i’m so sorry. fuck, i shouldn’t have done that一”
you’re snapped out of your trance as you stand up to chase after him. “jjun, hey, wait! listen to me—”
he’s picking up his bag from the foot of your couch. he can’t even look at you, instead occasionally letting out a shit or two under his breath.
“yeonjun, please一”
you stand in front of him to block his way from the exit. at first his head is bowed, avoiding your gaze, but when he finally looks up his expression is solemn.
“you are not a rebound to me,” he says at last. “please don’t ever think that i just used you to make me feel better.”
“i never accused you of that! look, i’m sorry too, it was my fa一”
“i’m really sorry, but i can’t stay here anymore. i’ll make it up to you, y/n, i promise.”
“wait一”
yeonjun walks past you and before you can protest any further, he’s out your door. you push it open and try to chase after him, but after a few steps you stop, thinking better of it. what would stopping him even do?
you walk back inside and slump back down on the couch. the screen of your laptop faintly glows, and a half-eaten bag of chips has fallen to the floor. all at once the reality of what happens sinks into you: the kiss, his words, his departure.
you are not a rebound to me. the words echo in your mind.
a strange tension fills you, and you can’t even tell what emotion it’s supposed to be from: confusion, frustration, anxiety. with your whole body seemingly on edge, you grab a throw pillow from the opposite side of your couch and press it into your face.
you sob into it the tension crashes down on you in full force.
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for the next few nights the scene replays in your dreams: yeonjun leaning in ever closer towards you, your lips meeting his in a fervent kiss 一 each night’s dream-kiss more fervent than the last 一 and him suddenly pulling away. you awaken each time just as he breaks the kiss, the shock and confusion coursing through you again, and immediately after you reach for your bedside table to check your phone.
still no text from yeonjun.
you consider texting him again, but each time you type a new message you erase it, the blinking cursor driving you mad. how would you even know what to say? do you want to apologize? to beg for his forgiveness? to ask if you can still be friends?
you hate to admit it, but every morning you lie in bed for a few moments more to allow the dream to sink in. the look on yeonjun’s face appears vivid to you, from his eyes blown wide to his mouth slightly agape. your mind travels back to the moment he breaks the kiss, as if a sudden force pushed him away, the shock of it hitting you. then it wanders to the kiss itself, the feeling of his lips soft against your own, his arms warm as they hold you by the waist…
you shake the memory away, drag yourself out of bed, and continue on with your routine: breakfast, shower, get dressed. you resist the urge to check your phone for as long as you can. you stare at the little contact photo you set of yeonjun and remind yourself: you’re his friend. you need to help him heal. 
you recount your worries to soobin over snacks one day.
“i feel like i’m being selfish,” you say in between munches of potato chips. “he hasn’t even moved on from hana”— soobin winces at the acridity you mutter her name with—“and now one of his closest friends kisses him like she’s madly in love. how is he supposed to move on? he’s hurting enough as it is.”
soobin sets aside the bag of chips you just finished. he rubs his face with his hands as he tries to choose his words carefully.
“you’re not being selfish, noona. you sound like you’re trying to be careful so that you don’t hurt him,” he says at last. “and yeonjun hyung feels just as bad about it. he feels bad that he even started the kiss, and for making you feel like a rebound. you two sound like each other, to be honest.”
“i know he feels bad, it’s just 一 i don’t know how that will fix...” you wave your hands wildly in the air, “this.”
“you can start by talking to each other?”
“he didn’t reply to my last texts. and i… i don’t know if i should text him again.”
a moment of silence. soobin opens a pack of candy and chews on it, just to give himself time to think. he fiddles with his phone as he does, absentmindedly scrolling through his old texts, when one of them catches his eye.
“so, there’s this new restaurant that beomgyu wants to check out.”
“really, soobin, what does this have to—”
“he was thinking of inviting all of us there to hang out,” he continues. “including you and yeonjun hyung. we can plan for it a week or two from now so that you have space? and then you can get used to talking to him again there. if things get awkward, i can ask beomgyu to fill in.”
you purse your lips. “i dunno, i might cry if i see his face again.”
“if you don’t feel like it, just call in sick.” soobin’s mouth twitches into a small grin as he says it — you know he’s used that excuse to get away from social situations he doesn’t want to be in. now you’re starting to see the appeal of it.
“okay. i’ll think about it.”
ultimately you do decide to go, and two weeks later you’re the first to arrive at the restaurant. you can feel your hands trembling as you push the door open and your heart hammering in your chest. in your head you’ve prepared what you want to say to yeonjun and you mentally rehearse your words for the hundredth time.
you slide right into the booth and take a deep breath. you check your phone to keep yourself busy, letting yourself calm down until your hands have stopped shaking. as you’re scrolling through your camera roll looking at some memes beomgyu sent you, someone slides into the booth seat opposite yours.
“hey, y/n.”
yeonjun gives you a shy smile and the nervousness in your stomach kicks into overdrive. he looks much better now; the bags under his eyes have lessened, and his smile seems genuine. still, you can’t help but remember the last time you saw him, and you shudder.
he sees your reaction and winces, averting his gaze. when he speaks, his voice is soft. “y/n... are we okay?”
the question breaks you and whatever words you have prepared fly out of your mind. as you try to grasp at them again, tears prick at your eyes.. “yeah... yeah, we’re okay,” you say. you take a gulp of water to hold back the tears. “i was never mad at you, jjun, i’ve been worried out of my mind一”
“i’m sorry i never replied to your texts.” he places his hands atop your trembling ones. “i just felt so ashamed that i didn’t know how to face you.”
“and i’m sorry i never tried texting you again, i just didn’t know what you thought of me, and i was so scared that i lost you...”
“i was so scared that i lost you.”
you sniffle. “that makes both of us then. god, we were so stupid.”
“i missed you, y/n.”
“i missed you too, jjun.”
you let out a laugh of relief and he laughs too. with the sound of his laughter melding with yours, everything else seems to melt away: the tears in your eyes, the other noises of the restaurant, the baggage of the last two weeks. sitting before you is your old friend, holding onto your hand to comfort you, laughing together with you just like you always have. 
and just as always, you want nothing more than for your friend to be happy.
“so,” you begin, giving him the most reassuring smile that you can muster, “let’s start over?”
yeonjun glances down at the table, but you can see his eyes crinkling as they usually do when he smiles. “yeah, let’s do that.”
when beomgyu enters the restaurant right afterwards, all it takes is one glance at the scene before him to understand what happened. he turns his head towards you, meeting your gaze, and you give him a nod.
it’s going to be okay.
the kiss becomes an unspoken part of your history together, never mentioned and never acknowledged. you stop searching for hidden meanings to it, and instead settle on the explanation that it was simply a spur-of-the-moment reaction from pent-up post-breakup emotions. it doesn’t matter to you whether or not this explanation is true; it’s the explanation that gives you the most peace of mind, and that’s what matters. as the days pass, you think of it less and less, and eventually it is filed away in your memory, like a book never checked out of the library collecting dust. 
in the meantime, you pour your energy into rebuilding both your friendship with yeonjun as well as his fragile heart. the first few hangouts with just the two of you are awkward with a tinge of melancholy, with conversations feeling a little too short. fortunately, your shared friends are there to help: you and yeonjun are invited to video game nights at soobin’s, or a cute new cafe that kai wants to check out, or just a walk around the park. the silences feel less awkward when it’s quickly filled by a joke from beomgyu or witty remark from taehyun.
from time to time you see the shine in yeonjun’s eyes disappear, even for just a moment, when he encounters something that reminds him of “the ‘h’ word” (as beomgyu refers to her): a park bench where they had a date, or a dress on a passerby that looks a lot like something she would wear. sometimes one of his friends would recognize it and quickly divert his attention elsewhere. soon those diversions occur less and less often as fewer and fewer things remind yeonjun of her.
but things don’t truly feel normal to you until a month and a half later. your project at work has gone well, and yeonjun has completed the first draft of a mixtape he’s making. just as you muse to yourself that a reward would be nice, your phone buzzes.
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that afternoon you and yeonjun stroll down the shopping district a few minutes away from his house, trying on this and that. it isn’t long before you find yourself spending over your budget; it’s hard not to when yeonjun is constantly egging you to buy something you really want. “c’mon, y/n,” he whines as you put back another cute button-down on the rack. “you deserve it! you can wear it to work for the next phase of your project!”
he giggles when he sees your eyes light up at his words. “we do have another presentation for it,” you muse.
still, you draw the line when you spot an elegant tan jacket worn by one of the storefront mannequins. you stare at it longingly as if you’ve found your soulmate, and yeonjun sweet-talks you into entering the shop and trying it on. but when you see the hefty price tag on it, you sigh.
“i can’t justify this, jjun…”
“but you look great in it! and you want it so much. you’ll feel worse if you don’t get it.”
“maybe…” you glance down at the shopping bags in your hand. “i dunno, i’ve spent so much already.”
you sigh in defeat and turn back to the store exit before you can second-guess yourself. yeonjun doesn’t follow immediately, but instead watches you go as he lingers a bit longer.
later that day, the two of you sort through all the things you bought (mostly clothes and accessories, but also a vinyl for yeonjun and a novel for yourself) in between giggles and wide eyes and a shower of compliments. yeonjun puts on a completely new outfit for you and struts down his apartment like a runway model, and he pulls you up from the floor to do the same. soon you’re laughing and clapping at each other’s performances, and yeonjun even whips out his phone to take photos of each other’s best looks.
as you rummage through your haul for one more outfit to assemble, your eyes land on a familiar spot of tan fabric. your mouth falls open when you pull it out and see that jacket — the one you’re pretty sure you didn’t buy. you glance up at yeonjun and he licks his lips before forming a mischievous grin.
“jjun, is this...”
“it’s yours.”
“you didn’t have to一”
“i saw the way you were looking at it, y/n. i just had to get it for you. c’mon, put it on.”
hesitantly, you take off the jacket you’re already wearing and put on the new one. it fits perfectly, just a little loose to let air flow in, and you love how it frames your figure. yeonjun is still smiling at you, but it’s a different smile. he looks at you as if you’ve transformed in front of him.
“you look really pretty,” he says. “let me take a few pics, okay?”
he snaps a few photos of you and you pose for the camera, and a comforting warmth settles over you. if this happened a few months earlier, you would have blushed and your heart would be doing somersaults, but now all you feel is a light flutter. everything feels fit in, like the final piece of a puzzle slotting into place.
you lock eyes with yeonjun as he takes the last photo and puts his phone away. as you whisper “thank you” to him, the gleam in his eyes is reflected in your own. there it is, that indecipherable look of his that makes you feel warm.
you still love him 一 there’s a part of you that still knows that. but over the last month and a half you’ve simply learned to live with your feelings, letting them fill you with lightness for a few moments and then letting them go. feelings or not, you’re just glad to have yeonjun in your life again. even as a friend, his presence is a soothing balm against the stresses of life.
months later, yeonjun is sprawled on your couch again, his head on your shoulder as you scroll through your list of rom-coms on your laptop. at one point the two of you resumed your pho and rom-com nights, and you’re glad for it; few things give you as much comfort after a long week of work.
after scrolling back and forth a few times, you pause on the same movie you’ve always watched together and give him a quick look. he simply smiles.
“don’t you get sick of this one?” you ask.
“not really, the ending always feels nice. are you… tired of it?”
“no no, i— i was worried that you’re tired of it.”
“me? never.”
“perfect, ‘cause i’m not either.” you give him a knowing grin and press play.
at this point you both know this movie so well that you recite along to every line. you do the female lead’s lines, yeonjun does the male lead’s, and you even sing along to the soundtrack. yeonjun stretches out on your couch even more, his head ending up in your lap, and in the movie’s quiet moments you find yourself playing with his hair. when the big confession happens you can feel him holding his breath and then releasing it in a laugh when the two leads finally kiss.
the credits roll and he glances up at you, smiling in satisfaction. you smile too and hum along to the end credits song. as the movie ends, you let yourself bask in it: you stretch out your arms, yeonjun sits up to lean on your shoulder again, and you lay your head atop his. the two of you remain like that for a while, sitting in comfortable silence.
“don’t you ever get jealous of them?” you ask.
you feel his head shake a bit as he chuckles. “i hate to admit it, but yeah. rom-coms always make getting together look so... fun.”
“right? i wish my life was like that.”
“god, me too.”
“i swear, it drives me insane,” you huff. “every time i watch this i want to start dating again or something.”
a few more moments of silence. yeonjun lets out a soft exhale and you feel his body grow tense. the air in your apartment seems stuffier.
“speaking of which, i have to tell you something.” 
“me...?”
you’ve never heard yeonjun sound so solemn. his head weighs down on your shoulder. “y’know, i’ve been uh... thinking of dating again.”
“oh... where are you dating this time? did beomgyu set you up again?”
he shakes his head, looks up at you for a split second, then looks down at his hands. you see the tips of his ears turn pink.
“actually, i... i have someone mind. someone i want to ask out, i mean.”
with those words the feelings you’ve brushed aside for so long come back in full force. your heart beats so hard it feels like it’s slamming into your chest. when you speak, your voice shakes.
“oh... who’s the lucky one?”
“i-i’ve known her for a while. she’s sweet and fun to be around... we’ve been hanging out a lot more often these last few months. we get along really well, at least i think we do...”
“sounds like you have chemistry with this special girl,” you say, the words heavy on your tongue. the hammering of your heart floods your ears. “so what’s stopping you from asking her out?”
yeonjun sits up to face you fully. you sense the effort it takes for him to look at you 一 has he ever been like this around you before? 一 and you reach for his hands. they’re trembling, and his ears go from pink to red.
“a long time ago,” he starts, voice shaking, “i kissed her. i kissed her after my last breakup. and i wasn’t thinking straight, i was just so lonely that i wanted to be loved again 一 but i can’t do that to yo— to her, she’s one of my best friends, i don’t want yo— her to be a rebound 一 but then you said we could start over so we did and i dunno, at one point i started liking you, i fell so hard i don’t know wh一”
you interrupt him with a kiss, your lips gentle on his. you feel him kissing you back, his movements gentle as his hand comes up to hold your head in place. you find yourself pressed against him and he’s even warmer than you remember, warmer than those dreams you had so many months ago.
when you break apart, his eyes are glazed over in a look of pure admiration. 
“y/n...”
“jjun, i...” heat spreads across your face. “i’ve loved you for years.”
“then why didn’t you say anything?”
“how could i? what if you didn’t feel that way and it ruined our friendship? and with all the other guys too?” your heart is still beating fast but you let out the words while your boldness still has a hold on you. “and then you dated hana and i cried but i wanted you to be happy 一 then you broke up and you kissed me and i liked it, and i hated myself for liking it because you were 一”
yeonjun pulls you into him, arms encircling you, and as you keep rambling into his chest he soothes you with one hand combing through your hair. his other arm grips you firmly, and your own arms find a firm hold around his neck.
“i love you too, y/n,” he whispers into your hair before leaving a kiss there. “it’s okay.”
“i love you, so much...”
he pulls apart to get a good look at your face. as he sees a few tears start to roll down your cheeks, he brushes them aside with his thumb.
“so this girl,” he says, affection lacing his words, “after we kissed, she said we could start over. and we did. and i’m really glad we did, because i fell for h一 for you so hard.”
you lean your head forward so that your forehead touches his. “really?”
“really. and i...”
“do you want to kiss her again?”
yeonjun’s breath hitches and his eyes meet yours. there it is 一 that same look of his that makes you feel light. the one that, you realize, makes you feel loved.
“can i?”
“please,” you whisper.
he closes the gap between your lips and his, and this time you feel only relief and bliss.
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