#(and i forgiven her actions outside of the prison..)

[plan-3-tmars]

"forgiven Kotoko" I say into the mic. The audience boos and I usher myself off stage. Just before I step off, however, somebody stands up and shouts "wait!". They begin to furiously type a twitter thread on how I'm wrong. It's Fuuta Kajiyama.

[blueepink07]

Yuno's birthday is today, so I decided that I wanted to post something for her! I quite struggled to find a topic to talk about, because there are already many analyses of her birthday art, so I decided to take a look at the interrogation questions, and found something really interesting!

(not sure if it's a tw, but I talk about some negative aspects of society and some more or less sad things that life has to offer!)

"How many years do you want to live?"

Considering that with every birthday you are aging up, I wanted to do a short character analysis for Yuno, and reasons for why her answer makes sense. (Also, I felt like this answer of hers was overlooked a little!)

1. Yuno is a realistic person: she stated it herself in the interrogation questions and actively shows this in the voice dramas

"A realistic person is someone who believes that the world has a certain way of working and is willing to accept it. Realists are the people who believe that the world is not perfect and that there will be problems. They are not idealistic and have few unrealistic expectations."

In the first VD, Yuno shows understanding of how the real world works, how people act in certain situations, judge their peers for their own selfishness, to feel better about themselves. Yuno, despite her young age, already grasped the negativity traits of the society and how themselves are the cause of the enclosure of their minds and specific features in order to fit to what is considered the norm and morally accepted.

However, she thinks different in comparison with the majority. Yuno lives for fun, she wants to experience exciting things! She wants to avoid boring activities or situations. Problems or any kind of inconvenience are considered bothersome.

And there are plenty examples for that!

Yuno second voice drama:

"Yuno: I said so at the start, didn’t I? That punishing people outside of the law is boundless. And so I had no interest in Milgram.

Es: Yes, I remember. You said that you would pay my judgment no mind and remain as you were.

Yuno: Oh! That’s right! I’m happy you remembered. But, you know, I didn’t exactly hate it, Milgram. It’s nothing but weird people but it was warmer than my day-to-day life.

Es: It did appear as though you were having fun.

Yuno: Yes, it was fun! They may be murderers, but they’re interesting people! It puts me at ease, in a way, that we’re all people lacking in something.

Es: You are saying that that changed and it’s my fault?

Yuno: Yep! This situation’s bothersome-ness has won out over the fun so I am extremely cooled off. That is all."

During first trial, Yuno felt accepted in a group where everyone was lacking something. They are all murderers, so they can't be considered the norm or morally accepted. It was a mutual understanding that they are all different, they did something unusual, and so, for Yuno the atmosphere felt nice, calming. She always felt excited, because Milgram was a nice change of place for her, different from the judgemental people from outside who were bounded by the rules.

That's why she is expressing her total distaste towards Es's actions. They are the same as the society: judging the prisoners constantly, enforcing rules and punishments which are constraining their lives in Milgram.

Moreover, because of the first trial results, the prison is no longer a safe place, because of the conflicts that arose between characters, for example: Kotoko's rampage, Amane and Shidou.

If during the first trial, they were all the same, some people stuck in a weird prison, due to their unusual actions, in second trial, they were divided into two groups: forgiven and guilty, resulting in having different treatment, creating an imbalance between them.

The forgiven prisoners, although they still lack a certain something or desire, with an innocent verdict, it diminished a little that feeling of emptiness, happy that there is someone who understands them.

Haruka second voice drama

Haruka: I wanted to thank you, Warden-san!

Es: Thank me?

Haruka: Because you forgave me, Warden-san!

Es: …

Haruka: Because you told me that what I did wasn’t wrong…! That’s what changed me! I was saved by you, Warden-san…

Muu second voice drama

Muu: Ah, it’s been a while, Warden-san. – Things have gotten tough, haven’t they… Everyone seems to be struggling and the whole atmosphere feels tense because everyone’s struggling, it’s really troublesome.

Es: Is that so?

Muu: But as for me, I think Milgram has become a lot more comfortable! I know now that I can get whatever I want if I ask for it, so I don’t need to be so on edge anymore.

Or it evoked a new purpose in their life, a new change in their mindset.

Shidou second voice drama

Shidou: I need to be punished… but I need to stay alive, or young lives will be lost. I… I don’t know what to wish for anymore. I’m starting to think… that I want to live. That I want to be forgiven. Despite being so riddled with sins…!

The guilty prisoners, however, if they lacked something before, now that feeling is amplified. Some of them lost confidence of their initial thoughts, are broken and injured.

For Yuno, this imbalance of treatment between prisoners is similar with how people are acting in the real world. Those who have it better tend to turn a blind eye towards the problems. They are aware of them, but most of the time, don't act to resolve them, because it isn't a concern, or there must be someone who can take care of it. Sometimes, people tend to judge those who have it worse, because there it always must be a reason for why they are in such a difficult situation, most probably it's their own fault.

Yuno, herself, doesn't really like to associate with bothersome situations and problems, but she knows when she needs to take responsibility and will do anything to assure that her family and friends are in good health. When Shidou is not around, Yuno is the one who keeps Mahiru company and makes sure that she is fine!

In a way, it makes sense why Yuno dislikes Haruka and Muu. Although they know about these problems in prison, they were never seen trying to help a little, always living in their own bubble! Muu's lack of concern in this situation annoys Yuno, as it easily resembles the way society is.

Muu: The ones who are suffering are the ones who have done bad things, right? You know, like, what goes around comes around.

Es: …

Muu: Besides, Kotoko hurt and was mean to the people who didn’t get forgiven by you, right?

Es: …Yeah.

Muu: Wouldn’t it be weird for me to have any thoughts on that, then? After all, I didn’t do anything wrong. You forgave me!

Moreover, Yuno is an expert at reading the atmosphere and changing the way she acts based on which person she is with or situation, something that Muu doesn't really bother with.

Muu and Yuno timeline post

"Mu: Hey~~~Isn’t everyone a bit gloomy lately? I get that this situation isn’t ideal, but you’re really bringing down the mood for my birthday.

Yuno: Haha, surely even you can tell now’s not really the time for something like that right. Nobody’s really in the mood, or rather nobody has time time to deal with something like that."

It gets quite long, so I'll get to the point! Explaining why Yuno hates the society, makes sense for why she answered like this! She gives herself enough time to experience adulthood, as she wants to have a job which would interest her and still wants to experience some fun along with it! But she doesn't see herself as spending so much time in a world like this. Because it's too serious, too complicated and at a certain point, she'll get completely bored of it!

"Do you have any dreams for the future?"

2. As the years pass, you grow older and such have more problems or struggles. Financial issues, stress at job, taking care of the house, maintaining relationships can be more harder, feeling of loneliness.

Moreover, 40 years old is in average almost half of the lifetime for humans. In the second half, you start to experience a decline in health, meaning more stress and pain.

Describing all these in such a negative light really looks like there is a lot of hassle...

As I stated before, Yuno would dislike all these problems, it deprives her from the fun time and from the warmth she is actively seeking for.

Also, this timeline conversation with Amane, let us see an interesting part of her character!

"Yuno: Sorry for barging in when you’re getting into your worldview thing. But Mahiru-san’s finally managed to get to sleep. Humour me with some small talk while I take a break.

By the way, Amane. Have you ever wished you were never born? I’ve thankfully lived a pretty fun life so far, so haven’t really. But you seem to be struggling with something. So I kinda wondered if you thought like that."

It's human nature to wish to escape from this world, every time you reach a difficult point in life.

It seems that Yuno quite thinks the same. Despite not experiencing this feeling, because, so far, she had lots of fun, she doesn't have much interest in living in a world where there are many problems. She doesn't want to struggle much, so adulthood, if she's unlucky and doesn't fulfil her wish of having an interesting job, would not be very exciting...

Also, she doesn't have a positive world view when it comes to hardships.

Yuno first voice drama

"Yuno: Hm~What's this? A lecture? Are you a believer in Seishinron? I hate them more than anything else, you know?"

She's realistic, this kind of belief is used to motivate people in order to work more. It's an idolized version of the world, in Yuno's opinion. Already having this mindset, means that she is aware that not every future problem can be solved. Health problems? It depends a lot of the circumstances, but unfortunately, not always they can be overcomed. Stress at job? Or it's just a temporary event, or it is the norm. The option would be to find something else, but that also means again stress and sometimes is very difficult to find.

Anyway, Yuno gives herself time to experience adulthood, but doesn't want to spend much time as an adult.

3. Old people are most of the time treated as nuisances by the society...

And the way they are depicted, is something that Yuno would never want to be referenced!

Weak, frail, feeble... Financially distressed.... It reminds me of a certain line...

"Yuno: I’m not pitiable. My family gets along super well. And I’m not particularly struggling for money. I decided, of my own free will, to do it because I felt that it was necessary for me."

People tend to remember relatives mostly by the last moments of their life, usually when they are old. Yuno doesn't want to be remembered as weak, old or fragile! She wants to be remembered as a strong person, smart and fun to engage with! That’s why she would rather live a shorter, healthy life, than to be considered something that she hates.

4. In most cases, when people reach adulthood, they see their parents growing old. They are struggling due to health issues and, as their child, it can be hard to watch something like this. Also, you have this anticipation that one day, you'll never see them again.

Despite 40 years old it's not the most predominant age when it comes to family loss, there are still many people that experience grieving at younger ages.

Yuno cares deeply about her family, as stated in interrogation questions and minigrams. For her, the idea of losing a family member will be very sad and painful, a concept that she doesn't want to think of!

Interrogation question examples:

"What do you think about your family?"

"Is there someone you want to see right now?"

"Imagine you receive 1.000.000 yen that you must spend right now: what would you use them for?"

"If you had one wish, what would you use it for?"

If I think about it, Yuno has the most interrogation questions in which she is talking about her family!

Also, the minigram in question in which is shown her wholesome bound with her brother!

40 years old would be the perfect age in order for Yuno to not see her family members being in pain or, worse, losing them...

I hope I gave a good insight of Yuno's character and explained why this answer makes so much sense!

Thank you for reading! ~ 🎂

[purgemarchlockdown]

Hm...thinking about the Narrative Order in which everyone is introduced in Milgram. This is very speculative, I'm just considering how everything unfolded and how everyone builds off each other.

01- Starting with Haruka Just Makes Sense, his story is quite similar to a lot of common sympathetic murderers in fiction. A troubled kid in an abusive household who murdered animals. It's a good baseline for introducing the audience into Milgram and helps the conflict feel a lot simpler than it actually is. Haruka is Easy to Forgive, he's pitiful and shy. He won't hurt anyone else.

02- Continuing to Yuno also makes sense. Yuno's story is vague enough that it's easy to interpret as sadder than it actually is. Making it easier to sympathize (project) onto her. Plus Yuno as a character is charming and likable.

But Yuno also challenges the audience in her VD a bit:

"That’s right. You know those people who just wanna convince themselves, so they intrude in other people’s affairs even though it’s not their place—I despise them."

It's an easy forgiven but we're already alluding to some greater themes here.

03- Fuuta is a Great Choice to insert after these two. After two more-or-less easy forgiven prisoners, we have a guy whose rude, ill-tempered, and unwilling to admit fault for his behavior. It really makes sense that Fuuta would get a not forgiven verdict since he comes after two of the most sympathetic characters in T1. But he also challenges the audience even more since Fuuta is parallel to them and introduces some more fun themes about justice and righteousness.

04- And it makes even more sense that Muu got forgiven because she just came after ill-Tempered Mcgee here! Fuuta is set up to fail and Muu is set up to win in a way. Muu is pitiful, shy and similar to Haruka. And since she's coming right after Fuuta, those traits contrast with him. Even though there's a lot of hints in both her VD and her MV to Muu's more manipulative and callous behavior.

05- While everyone else's stories seemed (Highlight: Seemed) straightforward. Shidou's is vague, confusing and is alluding to him killing A Lot of people. Yet Shidou is affable and "kind" in the VD and seems grief-stricken and remorseful in Throw Down. I would joke about how Shidou is divided like this and how he's 05 but I don't know how to set that up. My point is he basically introduces more ambiguity and confusion to what Seemed to be a simple job before him.

06- Mahiru is interesting since people more or less ran based off a interpretation that had very little proof outside of Psychogram. I'd imagine that her placement in the lineup is to continue the increasing ambiguity in the character's stories and the dissonance between the personality and the actions they committed. Mahiru is so sweet and lovesick and her MV reflects that, yet we know Something Happened under all of this sweet fluff. We just don't know exactly What and Ai nan desu yo doesn't really make it Clear. And Mahiru seems so nice...she wouldn't of hurt him for no reason, would she?

07- Then Kazui comes in and makes things Even Worse. This job being simple? Completely throw that idea out of the window. What the hell happened in Half? What's going on with the lady? Did he cheat on his wife? Did he not? It doesn't seem like her directly murdered his wife what's up with that? You know he's lying, he told you in the VD so what is he lying About? Is he actually as tired and resigned as her presents himself in his VD? Is he scheming? You Don't Know and Es Does Not Know.

08- Amane's MV isn't really ambiguous, its highly symbolic yes, but it's easy to put together (Mostly) what's going on. Compared to Throw Down or Half. But her verdict is probably one of the farthest from simple in the series. Amane seemingly has the same stock sympathetic murderers backstory that Haruka does. An troubled kid in an abusive household. But since Amane personality is not traditionally sympathetic and her motives seem more threatening and dangerous, she's more easy to punish than Haruka is. But also...you'll be punishing an abused child. It's not easy.

09-010: these two are being put together for one reason: They Seem Simple. MeMe leans so Hard into the serial killer and evil alter idea and Harrow leans so Hard into the vigilante for justice idea that they Feel Simple. Mikoto jumps Es, Kotoko helps out Es. After Shidou, Mahiru, Kazui and Especially Amane. Having two characters whose stories seem Simple is reliving. Mikoto is Obviously like that and Kotoko is Obviously Like this. It's easy, it's real easy. Comforting even.

And then T2 starts and Everything goes to Shit as you realize that NO everyone is way more complicated than you initially thought and your all Fucked.

[unmeritedunearnedundeserved]

Another Joseph Prince Law Of Attraction Analogy

I like to take sentences out of Joseph Prince’s books, and allegorizing them into their principle centered equivalent.

Joseph Prince is a Christian pastor who I believe is one of the absolute greatest Law of Attraction teachers of all time and doesn’t even know it.

Here’s one of his quotes..

“My friend, knowing that you are completely forgiven destroys the power of sin in your life.”Pastor Joseph Prince, from his book Unmerited Favor

(My commentary and interpretation)

Many people in the world today feel that their manifestations are contingent on their performance and behavior.

They feel that if they do good, they’ll get good and if they do bad, they get bad.

This system is known as meritocracy and is based off of the idea that certain actions have (or ought to have) specific consequences.

And so, above, when Joseph Prince talks about being forgiven, this is really the idea of a person feeling deserving of a manifestation in their life despite the “bad” things they’ve done and despite their failure to meet certain performance standards.

Being “forgiven” allegorically speaking is an awareness that you are no longer subject to the consequences of your actions and in fact can override “consequence” through the power of your imagination.

“Sin” refers to the state of consciousness one enters when they believe in external powers and causes outside of their consciousness.

When one is in this “second cause consciousness”, they are “living in sin”, for they feel subject to the world and all its consequences.

And so the above statement that knowing you are completely forgiven destroys the power of sin in your life, is really an allegorical way of saying that, when you know that you are the First Cause and that your own thought is the one and only power, this destroys the power of the external world (sin) in your life.

In other words, when you know the Law of Attraction / Law of Assumption, you effortlessly rise above every condition and challenge.

When you know the Laws of Mind, you are subject to no man and no thing.

When you know you are the First Cause and that thought CREATES, you are IMMUNE to consequences.

You are no longer subject to that which the world is subject to. You are no longer of this world and you effortlessly express all you desire, without works or merits or reasons.

The laws of the world no longer apply to you.

You transcend what the world feels is true and effortlessly manifest your desire, even if the entire world feels you haven’t worked hard enough for it or don’t deserve it.

My friend, know that greater revelation of the Law of Attraction completely destroys the power of the external world and apparent “external causes” in your life.

You will be delivered quickly and easily from the most complex of conditions, for you know that all is an expression of your state of consciousness.

For Example: In prison, I once asked a female guard who was driving around the perimeter if she would throw a pack of cigarettes over the fence.

I was of course joking but I noticed that her tone of voice dropped and I could literally feel that she was unhappy with my request even though she drove away.

I returned back to my unit, afraid I would get a “write up” for soliciting staff, which is a serious write up.

Deciding not to resist the situation, I became at peace with it.

I told myself, “I’m going to visualize being safe and sound and having a clean and clear record. But if it happens, it happens. Whatever. I’ll be ok.”

And I fully accepted the idea of the potential write up.

As I expected, I was called down to an office to speak with a higher ranking officer who proceeded to ask me if I had asked so and so to throw over a pack of cigarettes.

I told her, “yes sir I did. And I’ll have you know that it was a joke, but I understand the seriousness of what I asked. And if you feel that you must write me up I completely understand and will ‘take my licks’.”

The officer told me to go back to my unit and that he would let me know his decision later.

I never spoke to him again.

You see friends, there is power in indifference and making up your mind that you are whole and complete regardless of what you want not happening.

The great irony is that once you make up your mind that you’ll be completely ok even if what you want doesn’t happen, it ends up happening anyway!

So when you know that you, as the First Cause, are not subject to conditions or to consequences, then decide that you are whole no matter what happens, then knowing you are completely “forgiven” from conditions and from the consequences of your mistakes, will destroy the power of “sin” (second causes / external powers) in your life!

And I love what Esther Hicks (Abraham) says

“You don’t ever have to experience something you don’t want to”.

[givemeanaccountalready]

Hi! Off sideblog/anon but anyways For the milgram ask game: Yuno for 2, 5, and 18

2. Favorite music video moment/frame?

Hmmm, I think this one is my favorite:

Pop off, queen 💅🏻

Honestly, I love the irony of Yuno going, “Oh, so you love your ideal me? How about I break it and see how much you love me then?” To which the Internet told her, “YAAAAS, SLAY GURL SLAY.”

Yuno is going to live her life the way she sees fit, and you can’t stop her or her catsona. In all seriousness, I do admire the confidence and agency that they gave Yuno in Milgram. It would have been so, so easy to say she did sex work as a last resort to make ends meet or some other reason, and Yuno makes it clear that her choices, while we may not agree or like every single one, are entirely her own. No one forced her to do this. This was something she chose. Not only is her agency very refreshing, but I also enjoy her acceptance that she may be condemned and is even open to it, even if it is only there to kill this pitiable image of herself. Maybe condemned isn’t the best word… open to the consequences of her actions, be it good or bad? She doesn’t shy away from what she’s done or that she won’t stop because people tell her not to. It’s interesting. I like her character a lot actually. She’s in my top 3 for Milgram 😅

5. Favorite voice drama line/moment?

“Well, if I were to say what I was trying to say… It’s fucking bothersome.”

Iconic.

It doesn’t help that I’m weak for precision F-strikes. I think she’s the first, and so far the only character to say fuck and I am here for it. I remember having English teacher after English teacher emphasize the importance of a good hook, and Yuno executed it beautifully. Her hook is succinct and strong, and then she goes straight into ripping Es a new one over the changed circumstances of Milgram. I know Yuno has a devil may care attitude, but that attitude reads to me more as a defensive front to present to the world rather than her being flippant and ditzy. She foils nicely with Fuuta and Kotoko in how the three of them look for justice. Fuuta focused more on calling out bad behavior than reparations before Milgram and during Trial 1, while Kotoko is almost certainly doubling down on her belief that she is the fang of justice. During Yuno’s first trial voice drama, it seems like she’s trying to feel things out and see what exactly Es and Milgram have in store for her and the other prisoners. During the second voice drama, she seems to have a grasp on what Milgram wants (justice outside of the law, seemingly without regard for nuance) and decides not to play ball.

She lists all the new issues with the Milgram prisoners that she is aware of and presses Es on what they are going to do. When Es is verbally cornered and repeats Milgram’s purpose statement, Yuno asks if repeating it makes it easier to believe (also iconic). Yuno doesn’t seem to be interested in making Es pay, just aware that they are not infallible, so don’t act like it. She doesn’t beat the dead horse with assigning blame, like Trial 1 Fuuta would have, but she isn’t trying to force consequences for Es’s decisions like Kotoko would have.

Fuuta and Kotoko operate on simpler terms of black and white morality, which feeds their behavior before and during their time in Milgram. Yuno is acutely aware of society’s perceptions and that situations vary in terms of complexity so blanket statements like FORGIVEN and NOT FORGIVEN are ultimately useless. It doesn’t allow for nuance and just causes trouble.

18. What non DECO Vocaloid song fits them?

To be honest, I don’t really know any Japanese songs outside of Milgram. She’d probably sing Katy Perry’s “Hot n Cold” to Es and Jackalope as an additional middle finger to Milgram.

Maybe, Kesha’s “Woman��? No, I think “Die Young” fits her vibe better. It’s a fun song to dance and sing to, especially when the drums hit. Yuno can pop off to it.

[genderqueer-miharu]

Talking more about yuno's situation, the whole abortion thing doesn't really make sense to me because if that's really what she did then it'd be really...boring??? I mean compared to every other prisoner yuno already feels out of place here but in a good way, she's observant, she's more self aware than anyone else, she's great at reading all the other prisoners she was the first one to say "fuck you" to everything in milgram, which is already such an interesting stance and direction for a character to take in a project like this, so why would they waste such a good and interesting concept like this if her "murder" was just abortion.

Not only that but like, every other character in milgram has done really bad things, like outside of their murders every other character has done something terrible too. Haruka killed a bunch of animals, fuuta was harrassing people online, mu bullied people at school, kotoko was beating people for fun, amane is here trying to start a cult again, shidou stole people's organs for god sake, compared to them what did yuno do? Like she was a sex worker and...had an abortion??? That's it?? It just doesn't track. From a narrative perspective and from everything that milgram is trying to do it doesn't make sense for yuno's murder to be an abortion.

But aside from all of that her reaction and behaviour in this trial makes more sense to me if she really did kill someone. She is annoyed at the audience for seeing her as a poor naive little girl who didn't know what she was getting into so then she went "i knew very well what i was getting into i chose all of this you think i'm some victim you really don't understand anything about me right?" And she literally said "innocent? I'm so not that" does this mean she wanted to be guilty? Not necessarily, she just doesn't want to be judged or psychoanalyzed like that. She hates people making assumptions and speculating about her, but unfortunately this is the way milgram works, which is why she mentioned in her audio drama that she hates milgram, the position she took goes against the way milgram works, it's like she's opposing the entire system. I don't think she would've been happy with either result, she already told us "Don't weigh me, meassure me against your morality", she doesn't need our opinion and she doesn't need our validation, she doesn't want the opinion of someone who doesn't know her, she doesn't need someone else to choose wether she's forgiven or not.

To me her reaction doesn't just say "stop telling me i'm innocent because i want to be guilty" but rather "stop trying to judge me and my actions based on the idealized fake version of me you've created in your head". She's not just angry that she was voted innocent, that's part of it but at the end of the day i don't think she cares either way, she's mad that she was voted innocent AND that people are going out of their way to make false assumptions and incorrect theories about her, this includes her abortion being her "murder". She's mad because people who don't even know her are judging her based on things that are just not true, or at least not the full story. This is why in Tear Drop she destroys that luxurious and elegant room she was in, that she was forced to be in, this is why she jumps towards us tearing the curtains apart at the end, she wants us to see her true self, she jumps in front of us in a way we can't ignore. This is why she says: "If you want 'me', come marco i'll polo" along with the reference to Umbilical right after this, she wants to be caught, she gave us the clues already, they're there in her first mv, it's up to us now to find out what she did, to find her true self, after all that's what we're here to do right?

[heartfeltgram]

𝟎𝟎𝟔 𝐕𝐎𝐈𝐂𝐄 𝐃𝐑𝐀𝐌𝐀 — 𝐏𝐒𝐀𝐋𝐌 𝟑𝟒:𝟏𝟖

CW HEAVY RELIGION / CATHOLICISM, IMPLIED ABUSE

[The only thing audible from the cell this time is the sound of radio static. It seems like this prisoner was able to obtain a radio - but they hadn’t properly adjusted the channel ; it was just white noise at this point. White noise, and silence.]

SHIKI: Oh… Is that the radio you requested? I was wondering why…

IORI: I wanted to listen to the sermons. 

SHIKI: Oh, so you’re religious? Hmm, didn’t they mention something about that…?

SHIRO: They said he was a “religious nut” and to ignore him if he starts talking about God too much… 

SHIKI: Riiight. You have a better memory as always, Brother! ^-^

IORI: …I’m not a religious nut. My parents are catholic, so… it’s my duty to be as well.

SHIKI: Is that what you have to do, or what you want to do? There’s a difference, you know that, right?

IORI: Isn’t it what I should do? It doesn’t matter if I want to or not. 

SHIRO: [Under his breath] Talk about a loss of autonomy…

[Iori reaches over to the radio and turns it off. The static finally stops and now the room is completely silent, with the exception of breathing.] 

IORI: I don’t know why they’ve sent you. I already know that I’ve been damned to hell, so what purpose does it serve to be judged by you? 

SHIKI: We’re just here to ask you a few questions. No need to get so… defensive about it. Firstly, what’s your name, age, and occupation if you have one?

IORI: …My name is Iori Flynn. I’m 14. I go to a Catholic boy's school and live in the dorms for a good part of the year. 

SHIKI: …Why does that kind of make sense?

SHIRO: Shiki… it’s not nice to assume things about people…

SHIKI: [Hushed] But, Brother… isn’t it kind of obvious from the way he’s acting…?

SHIRO: [Whispering] Is what obvious, exactly? 

SHIKI: [Hushed] I mean, just… he seems… it feels like he’s too compliant…

IORI: You don’t have to whisper about me, you know. 

SHIKI: Ah— Sorry about that, ehe… ^^;;

IORI: It’s whatever. 

SHIRO: Hmm… well, uh, uum. How was dorm life? How does it compare to being here? 

IORI: …It was fine. We were kept on a tight schedule. It feels… odd. To not have that here. I was hoping that I’d still be able to access some form of mass but, the radio won’t pick up any stations at all. 

SHIKI: Nothing at all? It’s almost as if we’re cut off from the world… Kinda scary, huh?

IORI: It is, a little bit. But I’m supposed to believe that my faith will carry me through any hard times. 

SHIKI: All this talk about “supposed to”... Is there anything that you want outside of that? Anything at all? It seems to me like you aren’t allowed to say or think anything else…

IORI: I’ve always been told to do good in the eyes of the Lord. Maybe I took it to heart too seriously. 

[Quietly] It does feel like I’m not allowed to do much else, though…

SHIRO: Is this something your parents told you? 

IORI: No, not really. My mother is often telling me to loosen up a bit, that what the school teaches isn’t that important. But she wasn’t catholic until she met my father, and he says I have to pay attention to my studies. If not studies, then whatever I do should be actions that a man of God would make. Even if I’m 14, and don’t understand what it means to be a man yet… 

SHIKI: Wow… Your dad sounds like a lot to handle. That’s a lot of pressure he’s putting on you at your age.  [She pauses for a moment, then widely grins.]   Well, no need to worry, ‘cause he’s not here, right? You’re free to do whatever you want now, aren’t you? What’s holding you back?

IORI: Isn’t God supposed to be able to see me wherever I am? Know what I think and what I do? 

[There’s a long pause of only silence.]

IORI: …Do you think I’d be forgiven, if I let my guard down?

SHIKI: [She opens her mouth to speak, and then promptly shuts it.]  I… I don’t know.

Well… have you talked to any of the others? Made friends with them?

IORI: I tried but… Choko didn’t seem to like me much and Kaede’s too energetic for me to handle, it’s almost intimidating, and those are the only two around my age… I wouldn’t want to burden any of the adults by talking to them. 

SHIKI: Hmm… Well, aren’t you using their first names, though?

IORI: …I always forget I’m not supposed to. Japanese is my second language and I don’t get to use it a lot at home. 

SHIKI: Oh! You’re not from Japan, then? Then, where are you from? If you don’t mind me asking…

IORI: Ireland. 

SHIKI: Oh. Interesting! So do you speak Irish, too? Do you know any other languages?

IORI: Since my grandparents can speak some, I’m able to speak a little Gaelic myself. Other than that, I’m mostly fluent in English. And before you ask - my mom moved to Ireland from Japan. 

SHIRO: ...Sorry for interrupting the flow of the conversation, but does that mean you’d be able to help translate for the other prisoners? We were told one of the others doesn’t speak a lick of japanese. 

IORI: …If the situation calls for it. But I’m not allowed to be present during other interrogations, so you’ll have to deal with it on your own.

SHIKI: Understandable, but… it’s kind of unfair, isn’t it? How do they expect us to interrogate someone that we can’t understand?

IORI: Maybe that's their way of making sure it isn’t. It’s not impossible that they rigged the system, right? 

SHIKI: But… Why would they? Don’t they want us to find out the truth?

IORI: Who knows… I guess part of me fails to see the point in being able to be forgiven. I’ve prayed in confession time and time again but I know I’ll never be clean of what I did and there’s people way worse than me here. Who’s to say that they want us to be innocent at all? 

SHIKI: Hey… Are you… alright? 

IORI: ….I’m fine. Why wouldn’t I be. 

SHIRO: Isn’t it about time we move on to the next question? I’m not sure how much time we have left here. 

SHIKI: Brother’s right. Hmm… Let me put it this way. How would you react if, and this is just an example, God were to view you as a sinner, a murderer, unforgiven in every sense?

IORI: As far as I’m concerned, he already does. 

SHIKI: Uhhh… Right. Brother, you take it from here. I feel… unqualified.

SHIRO: I’m not sure I’m any more qualified than you are…

How about we phrase it differently - ignore the idea that it’s God watching you. How do you feel about being put in prison, that people know you killed someone? 

IORI: I feel like… like I know that I can’t deny what I did. But I’m conflicted and can’t tell if what I did was the right thing. I did it to save myself… but I still had that intent. I feel like I made the world a better place… but I still have to take the blame for it. 

SHIRO: …Was it life or death? 

IORI: Sometimes it felt like it. 

SHIRO: Then don’t the means justify the ends? 

[The mechanical bell tolls once more, quieting all voices who hear it.] 

[Shiki gives her brother a knowing look. It’s the end of the interrogation.]

SHIKI: Well, do you have anything else to say before the end?

IORI: You make it sound like I’m getting executed.

SHIKI: Who knows, really? We’ll have to see.  [She clears her throat.]  Prisoner Number Six…

SHIRO: Iori Flynn…

SHIKI & SHIRO: Sing your sins!

[MV: Shounen to Priest]

[mukuberry]

It's fun that half (maybe more) of the prisoners have basically already received judgements for their sins before coming to Milgram, and i love how it's reflected in their behaviour

Haruka, Fuuta and Muu have all be unforgiven by the people around them (Haruka's mother, Fuuta's online friends and Muu's classmates) and it's clear in their behaviour. All 3 have dealt with extreme shame since the moment they arrived in Milgram.

Haruka and Muu were forgiven by us and because of that they're acting overly confident and only listening to eachother. They both deal with clear guilt from both their murders and the rejection they received and now that we've forgiven them they're desperately burying that guilt and blocking out everyone that disagrees (esp seen in Haruka considering Es to be one of his 'mothers' before changing his mind when Es starting criticising his actions)

Fuuta on the other hand was voted unforgiven by both the people she trusted and us, and its so obviously eating away at her. Since no one is defending her, she defends herself as aggressively she can, lashing out, denying her involvement, putting the blame on others, and comparing her actions to others who have done worse.

Amane and Kotoko, however, were voted innocent by the people in their lives. Both show dependence on those people even when inside Milgram and as with pretty much every character (except Yuno ig good for her) have guilt over their crimes, but they've effectively suppressed it due to the support given.

Kotoko was forgiven by us, and because of that she isn't talking about the people who understand what she's doing as much, and is using Es as a replacement for them now. It's very clear in Deep Cover that she needs us to keep giving her that forgiveness, just as she constantly looked for reassurance in her old allies.

Amane was voted unforgiven by us, and has completely fallen back onto her cults endorsement for support. Without us to forgive her she's lost her individuality and acts as if she was the cult itself, using their violent ways to get us to do what she wants and even referring to herself as the cult itself instead of as herself (using we instead of i/me).

Obviously their own personalities and pasts outside of their judgements play into this, but its fun seeing how their reactions to our verdicts of their crimes mix with their first judgement by people on the outside. You could also argue that Shidou was unforgiven by the flower person dying after all the people he killed, and I'm sure theres other too but I'll just leave it at that for now :)

[melishade]

More Black Panther: Wakanda Forever Shit with spoilers (Because this has officially consumed me). Part 1 of my thoughts are here and now let’s get into Namor. Because a lot of Namor’s actions, were out defense, or an action of an outside force.

I have a vague idea that Namor was some sort of anti-hero in the Marvel Comics, but I didn’t know much else about him. But Ryan Coogler has so far made antagonists in the MCU more...sympathetic. Or at least someone that has a point. I mean it was because of Killmonger that T’Challa decided to open Wakanda to the rest of the world. A villain ended up influencing a hero’s decision by the end of the movie.

But besides that, Ryan Coogler’s framing of Namor is really brilliant because Namor’s actions are out of defense and/or are justified.

When Namor returns to the surface to bury his mother in her homeland, only to find it desecrated, people that look like him enslaved and beaten, and the slave masters calling him demon, he responds by burning everything up there to the ground and preparing for the day of a possible invasion from those same people.

When T’Challa reveals Wakanda to the rest of the world, causing other countries to scramble and try to find Wakanda under the sea, Namor responds by killing everyone that attempts and tries. It might seem cruel, but if a single person on that vessel at the beginning of the movie, made it out and said that there are blue people in the water, his kingdom would have been discovered, and his people would be in danger. He has no choice but to make sure that there are no witnesses. 

T’Challa’s actions are also why Namor decides to approach Ramonda and Shuri after the attack. He’s probably thinking: even if it was an accident, Wakanda put my people in danger. You can help rectify that mistake by bringing me the scientist who helped with creating a machine to find vibranium, so that I may kill them and keep my people safe.

Then Shuri decides to go to Talokan willingly, and Namor responds by showing her the kingdom, and even explaining his backstory, and why he is doing what he is doing. Shuri’s actions are ones that show Namor that she is willing to understand. She wants to find a peaceful way. She wants to know why. Namor even states that he was blinded by hope when addressing his people about Shuri’s escape. He saw Shuri’s actions and responded with hope.

And even though the attack on Wakanda was devastating, and the loss of Ramonda has caused a pathway of anger and revenge for Shuri, it was a valid response from Namor. Think about it this way: Ramonda tricked Namor. Ramonda took Namor away from Talokan so Nakia could break Shuri and Riri out of prison, resulting in the death of two of his subjects. Who as far as we know, were innocent, especially since one of them responded in horror to Nakia when she killed one of their own. Even if Namor was aware that Shuri didn’t want this to happen and was under the assumption that Shuri had no part to play, her mother created a plan that compromised his people and got two innocent people killed. So he responds by invading Wakanda and taking Ramonda’s life. Her death was repayment for the lives that her plan had taken.

And when we get to the part where Shuri is completely ready to end Namor, she chooses mercy. She tells him to yield and they will create and alliance. Namor responds by yielding to Shuri. He knows for a fact that Shuri has not forgiven him for his actions. He knows that it’s because she feels empathy for his people, and that Wakanda has no allies. The world wants their resources. The only people Wakanda can trust, is a kingdom that is exactly like them.

So again, many of Namor’s actions were acts of defense to what was going on around him, and he was thinking of the benefit and safety of his people. I am really happy that Namor is alive by the end of this, because he is a really compelling character. Can’t wait to see him further in the MCU. Also, Tenoch Huerta did a phenomenal job as Namor.

(So tomorrow, I’m going to talk about the ancestral plane scene and You-know-who if you’ve seen the movie already).

[justanotherthrowaway1950]

Why Did Suki Quickly Become Friends with Zuko, Mai, and Ty Lee

A common complaint people have about Suki’s character is the fact that she not only quickly became friends with Zuko, Mai, and Ty Lee while letting the latter into the Kyoshi Warriors, but also became Zuko’s bodyguard in the comics at Mai’s request, even though the Kyoshi Warriors have no ties to the Fire Nation and the Earth Kingdom needs help rebuilding.

For Zuko burned her village and only offered a meek apology when she pressed him about it while Mai and Ty Lee, even if they were instrumental in helping her, Sokka, and Hakoda escape the Boiling Rock, are never seen on screen or on panel actively rejecting the Fire Nation’s imperialist ideology or apologizing for the actions they took under Azula’s commands, acts that include helping Azula imprison the Kyoshi Warriors before using their identities to overthrow the Earth Kingdom.

So why is Suki so quick to forgive and befriend Zuko, Mai, and Ty Lee when they, on the surface, have done little to apologize for their past actions and Suki still vehemently dislikes Azula, Zuko, Mai, and Ty Lee’s former associate?

Well, in regards to Zuko, best explanation for Suki quickly forgaving him is that without him defecting to the Gaang, not only would she still be in the Boiling Rock getting tortured (deliberate starvation is torture), but also the Earth Kingdom would have been burned to ground since the Gaang would have never confronted Ozai before the Comet passed without Zuko telling them of Ozai's plans for genocide. 

Moreover, assuming Aang doesn't find a way to restore the Avatar State without the pointy rock, or he never finds Iroh and learns lightning redirection from him, Aang would have died to Ozai's lightning if he tried ever tried confronting Ozai, especially during Sozin's Comet. 

Additionally, even if Suki hadn't completely forgiven Zuko by the time the Kyoshi Warriors became his bodyguards, she is smart enough to realize that if Zuko dies: the old and disgraced, both in the Fire Nation and world at large, Iroh takes the throne with no guarantee he lives long enough to raise another heir to adulthood; the world goes back to war since no one in the other nations would find it acceptable to have Ozai or Azula on the throne; or the Fire Nation devolves into civil war, with the rest of the world suffering as the violence will mostly likely not be contained in the Fire Nation, and the Fire Nation would likely to be unable to continue paying reparations.

Meanwhile, I think the best explanation for Suki quickly forgiving Mai and Ty Lee, outside of them betraying Azula playing a key role in her and half of the Gaang's survival, as well as playing a major role in Azula's defeat, is the assumption that they were forced to do Azula's bidding the whole time under the threat of death, or worse, to themselves and/or their loved ones. 

For I know people hate it, but the comics strongly imply that Mai and Ty Lee were never really friends with Azula, only her coerced subjects who had no choice but to follow her unless they wanted to suffer.

So I guess once Mai and Ty Lee got to explain themselves to the Gaang and the Kyoshi Warriors, with Zuko providing context, I think Suki decided to let bygones be bygones. 

Especially since she knows first-hand that Azula is willing torture those who have "crossed" her, and Mai and Ty Lee, at least until Ty Lee was transferred over to the prison where the other Kyoshi Warriors where staying, got thrown into the tortious Boiling Rock when they disobeyed Azula to protect a loved one.

So to conclude, the reason why Suki is so quick to forgive Zuko, Mai, and Ty Lee while also allowing Ty Lee to join the Kyoshi Warriors and eventually become Zuko’s bodyguard is because: their actions at the end of the war were instrumental to her and the Earth Kingdom’s continued survival, she knows first-hand how scary Azula can be, and because she knows Zuko remaining on the throne is key to ensuring the post-war order remains in tact.

[cakejots]

this is us trying, Chapter 1 - The Beginning of an End

In this AU, they don’t know each other outside of the suit. And in this AU, Ladybug and Chat Noir love each other. But in this AU, Chat doesn’t want their identities revealed.

Written for @ladynoirjuly 2021

notes: this is a coherent story based on all the prompts; each chapter contains at least 3 prompts

Ch 1 | Ch 2 | Ch 3 | Ch 4 | Ch 5 | Ch 6 | Ch 7 | Ch 8 | Ch 9 | Ch 10

Read on AO3

1. Older

“Well, Chaton?”

Chat stared at Ladybug as though she had grown an extra head.

“My lady, are you sure you want to know?”

“Oh come on Chat, there are at least tens of thousands of people who are of the same age. There’s no way you can figure out who I am just from that.” She leaned forward, chin on her palms and eyes sparkled with anticipation.

“Hmm, that is true.” His fingers under his chin, eyes searching the sky. “I'm turning 21 this year.”

Ladybug looked dazed for a moment before smugness took over. “So I was right about your age! Well, the age range at least.”

“Oh? And how did my lady manage to guess it?”

Ladybug slowly ran her eyes down his body before peering right back into his eyes, and she smiled innocently.

Chat barked out a laugh.

“Now guess mine!”

“Don’t need to. I know you’re in the same age range as meow.”

She raised an eyebrow and his lips curled slyly. “The same way you managed to guess my age. Do you really want me to say it? Or in this case, show it to you?”

Ladybug couldn’t help but blush. “Okay, okay. You’re not wrong, I’m turning 21 this year too.”

Chat’s child-like demeanour came back, eyes lighting up. “Okay, but now I have to know who’s actually older! Mine’s in September.”

“I'm Leo, so the range is from July to August,” she grinned.

Chat regarded her with a mixture of awe and shock. “No way�� You’re actually older than me!”

“Why is this a shock to you? I am more mature than you are,” Ladybug giggled.

“I mean, yeah, but for that fact to get thrust into my face, it just feels—”

“Surreal. I get it,” she sighed blissfully.

They fell into a peaceful silence as this new realisation settled within their hearts and minds. They were finding the most minute of things to share without giving away their identities, and just this tiny, basic fact about each other was overwhelming enough.

This, was something they could experience soon enough, to be normal again and enjoy the process of courting. This, was something they could slowly discover about each other soon enough, to fall in love harder, and to fall in love all over again.

“We are so close. So so close.” Chat gazed into her eyes, took her hand in his and squeezed, much like how his heart was feeling as it was overcome with emotions.

“We are finally nearing the end of all of this.” Ladybug pulled him into a tight hug.

2. Masks

It was over.

It was finally over.

It was a joyous day for Parisians as the supervillain who had been terrorising their city over the past few years had finally been caught and sent to prison.

It was a joyous day indeed.

But why was the atmosphere surrounding him so burdensome, just like the downpour that struck ever since he had entered the Agreste mansion?

The thunderstorm that raged above him, the Butterfly and Peacock Miraculouses that sat in his palm, and the face of the supervillain who was actually his father, glaring at him from a distance away with absolute despise and fury, they all seemed to be mocking him for his ill-fortune.

Of course there was no happy ending for him, even after the final battle. How could he have been so naive to believe that there was a positive outcome for him? He was the epitome of bad luck. From being chosen to be the Black Cat Miraculous holder, right down to his fate that had decided his course for him ever since he was brought into this world.

He was all alone now. His mother’s passing during his early teenage years had left an open wound in his heart. He saw the funeral happened. He cried as the ceremony went on for days on end. He was there to witness the burial of his mother. Those were definitive proof that his mother had passed. He has been mourning for his mother every year on her death anniversary.

So imagine his shock when he saw her in the basement he didn’t know existed, still as radiant and beautiful as he remembered. And to be slapped with the knowledge that his father had a hand in all of this.

He had a hand in withholding the truth about his mother’s whereabouts all this time. The truth that he had rights to. That she was well and alive but in deep deep slumber, one that she might never awake from. He had a hand in causing him so much pain, so much trauma. To be the perfect child he is to be, else he was no son of Gabriel. The direct role his father played in causing him to feel neglected, unloved, and worthless. Just so that he could play the supervillain and recruit innocent Parisians in his quest to obtain the Ladybug and Black Cat Miraculouses.

He caused Parisians so much pain, stripping them of their right to feel what they feel. A minor slipped up from being unable to control their emotions and they became the villains for the day. He had used them for his selfish desires, to do his dirty work for him. All this for not being able to move on from the death of his wife. Not being able to accept the natural cycle of life.

And all of this had happened under his nose, but he didn’t even know. He has been living with the supervillain all his life. He has interacted with the supervillain almost daily. He has shown care and concern for the supervillain. He has forgiven the supervillain for his actions, always telling himself that he had his reasons for acting the way he did. He was a superhero and he didn’t even know.

If he had known, maybe he'd be able to convince his father to stop whatever he was doing. Maybe even prevent the current outcome of events, and even save his father from serving jail time. Some superhero he is.

He didn't know what would become of his mother, but he had long accepted that she had passed. And now, his father will leave his side, to pay for what he did.

Chat was truly alone now.

“Chaton?”

He blinked and looked over to his left. His lady was standing right beside him with concerned eyes, her hands on his left arm. The rain had lightened up considerably and he could see her as clear as day. He didn’t register her touch until he had seen it himself.

Chat wordlessly turned towards her and extended his right hand, the hand that held the two missing Miraculouses. He was expecting her to take them from him and called it a day with their habitual fist bump, but she closed his right hand and held both his hands in hers tightly and peered into his eyes.

“Chaton, are you alright?”

Ladybug cursed herself for asking the obvious. Clearly, he wasn’t feeling his usual self. The cheeky and confident demeanour he always had after the end of a battle was gone. His ears, tail, and posture seemed so deflated and depressed that he just looked like a kitten kicked hard.

She touched his face.

Chat grabbed her hand on his face and wanted to smack himself. His lady was right beside him all this time as he was drowning himself in self-loathing and self-pity. He couldn't let his gloominess take hold of her on this glorious day.

“I’m fine,” Chat showcased the brightest smile he could muster at that moment.

Ladybug worried her lips, not buying it for a single second.

“Chaton…”

He knew she wasn’t going to buy his act with the way she was watching him. Chat really didn’t know what he should do. His hand squeezed hers, he closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

“Can we go for a run, just for a while? I promised we’ll talk when we meet up again at the Eiffel Tower.”

When Ladybug didn’t respond, he opened his eyes to beg. “Please?”

Ladybug squeezed his hand before nodding and letting go, giving him a head start. Chat caught her hands before they fell completely by her side, and placed the Miraculouses within her palms. He made sure she put them away securely before jumping away. She followed him soon after, giving him the time and space he needed.

.

When Ladybug arrived at the Eiffel Tower, Chat seemed really nervous. She really didn’t know what made him like this, but he shouldn’t be that restless. Not of the revelations he made during the final battle and his rooftop run, and he definitely should not be uneasy about her arriving.

She extended her arms towards him. “Minou, can I hug you?”

Chat rushed to her and embraced her tightly. Her hands drew soothing circles on his back to release tension from his body, and he relaxed ever so slightly into hers.

“Okay, I’m ready to talk.” He took a deep breath to mentally prepare himself before he continued. “I-I know you’re looking forward to the reveal after the final battle. I am too. We’ve waited years for this moment. But… but can we not do that now?”

Ladybug instantly pulled back and gawked at him. To say that she was shocked was an understatement. She did not expect this at all. Yes, she totally forgot about the reveal because she was so focused on making sure he’s alright, but for him to just drop the bomb on her like that. “But—”

“I know this is a really unfair request from me,” he quickly added. “But I don’t want to deceive you. We can go on dates in our suits! So that you get to know me. All of me. How I act in and out of battle.”

He slowly averted his gaze. “And that the feelings you have for me will still be there even after our dates.”

Ladybug couldn’t believe her ears, Chat is still Chat, no matter the situation. The fact that he didn’t even include her in the proposal he just suggested made it obvious that he wasn’t even convinced himself. They both knew that they weren’t going to act any different. They’ve hung out outside of Akuma attacks, they will be the same in and out of the suit. It just didn’t make sense.

“Chat...” she pleaded.

“I’m so sorry, I’m so so sorry. Please don’t leave me,” he sobbed and enveloped her in a bear hug, afraid that she'd run if he didn’t have a tight enough grasp on her.

Wait, what? No, no! Where did he get the idea that she’s going to leave?

“I-I can’t—”

That's absurd.

“Chat, you don’t have to explain.” Her hands continued the back rubs from before, making sure that it soothed him enough till he’s comfortable loosening his grip. She slowly pulled back and cupped his cheeks, a smile on her face. “Words are not needed. I may not understand the reasons behind your decisions now, but I trust that your heart is in the right place.”

That subtle shine in his eyes did not go unnoticed by Ladybug. “Words cannot express how thankful I am, my lady.”

“Well, then better make it up to me with the dates you promised.”

“Of course, my lady.”

Judging the look on his face, she slowly added, “Do you need more time to sort things out?”

“I don’t know. Can you stay with me a while longer?”

She nodded understandingly and went back to hugging him. Chat tightened his arms around her and breathed in her scent. Her fingers left delicate touches in its trail from his back to his scalp, knowing full well that it's a gesture he’d appreciate. Low rumbles of purring slowly filled the air around them.

They stayed tangled for who knows how long before Ladybug popped the question.

“About the masks, are you sure?”

“Yeah. We don’t drop them,” Chat said with a conviction he knew was never there.

3. Tease

It’s been a week since the defeat of Shadowmoth.

A week since Chat broke down from whatever he had experienced during that short time frame of the final battle.

A week since he had declined the reveal.

Ladybug wasn’t pleased, how could she be? She had waited 6 long years for that, ever since the day they first met and swore to protect Paris from Hawkmoth’s clutches. Well, Shadowmoth now.

It sucked. Even Shadowmoth has had development. Her relationship with Chat? Null.

No. It wasn’t fair to say that. Of course their relationship had developed. From practical strangers to lovers, they trusted each other with their lives, even if they didn’t know who the other was behind that mask. That’s some intense trust they have right there.

But still.

She was really looking forward to the reveal. They were really looking forward to the reveal.

Chat must have had a reason for what he chose that day, strong enough to throw away what he desired most. But what?

Ladybug sighed, she supposed the only thing she could do was to hope that nothing about their relationship had changed. And be there for him when he needs it, like a good girlfriend she is. Are they even a couple? The unnamed boundaries were causing her additional anxiety she didn’t need now. She guessed she’d have to talk it out with Chat and make clear where they stood.

She got broken out of her thoughts when she heard footsteps approaching her.

“Hey...”

Before she even turned around, the tone of his voice sounded so tired, as though coming here was a chore for him. He had shared with her before that meeting her is always the highlight of his day. For it to become a chore… He must be really affected by it.

“My lady?” He stopped behind her.

That wouldn’t do.

She whipped around and flicked his bell, “Hey Chaton, you’re here!”

And as if that wasn’t enough, she had the sweetest smile he has ever seen plastered on her beautiful face. Those rosy cheeks and welcoming lips upturned, and the whites of her teeth slightly visible from her smile, directed at him. So happy to see him. So thrilled for him to be here.

It shot right through his heart. He couldn’t do anything else besides fixate his eyes on her radiant and alluring face.

“Aww, cat got your tongue? Or in this case, a ladybug got your tongue?” She cooed and flicked his bell once more.

She was relieved she still has this effect on him.

“S-she definitely did.” A pink hue dusted his cheeks.

Cute.

Ladybug figured the only thing she could do was to remind him of all the enjoyable memories they had together and banish the sad ones that gripped him from a week ago. The reveal can wait. What's important was to make sure he doesn’t forget why they wanted the reveal in the first place.

She concluded upping her tease factor was the way to go.

“I’ll make sure you know that my feelings for you are real and you won’t be able to resist my charms any longer.”

“My lady,” Chat whined. He was already regretting his decisions from a week before.

Ladybug, on the other hand, was grinning. She’d accept whatever he’s willing to give. She supposed she could get the ball rolling, to begin filling in on fresh empty pages as they experience falling in love all over again. Because deep down, that is what they’ve wanted after all.

[felidaefighter]

What Fate Cannot Burn

[Written before Niki had the news broken to her by the Syndicate; starfate is a platonic soulmate/best friend relationship, coined from @ufuckingpastry and their amazing fics! My wonderful friend and beta-reader @voidofthestars​ also has amazing fics with the term!]

Niki and Fundy don’t want to call themselves starfated, thinking it too cruel with their pasts. But someone has to break the news about Wilbur’s revival to Niki. They have a chat.

     Fate, it seemed, had always been against Niki and Fundy. Perhaps that was why they had always danced around their courtship, never solidifying anything as pale, never calling themselves starfated. The two had grown up together, embraced by the blackstone walls of L’Manberg. They had fought for their freedom and pets together, they had survived famine together-- they had, despite all their hurt, forgiven the traitor who raised them together. They had campaigned together, side by side, sharing ideals and morals and an understanding that they refused to color. They had also watched everything they’d been raised as, the ideals they were taught, had believed with all their heart, crumble with the walls to reveal the harsh truth of what was buried underneath, deeper than the TNT that waited amongst its foundations.

    Manburg did horrible things to its people. One of the worst things it did was destroy the pale courtship of Niki and Fundy. Fundy, coddled yet abandoned, desperate for love with no cornerstones to ground him, stayed loyal to the place that had been promised him, rather than its ideals. Niki fell the opposite way, and had screamed to the sky as the trust for her moonstruck-companion evaporated into the sky with the smoke of the flag she had sewn with her own two hands, with the symbol of everything they had ever fought for. Even the steady, parental hand of Eret could not calm the pain she had felt as she lost the relationship she never dared to name to a tyrant’s command. Eret could never understand. Only those in L’Manberg knew true betrayal. As it had always been.

    After the war, L’Manberg just wasn’t the same. And neither were two of its youngest citizens. Not just for the way that Niki couldn’t so much as look at Fundy without seeing the burning flag, or the way that Fundy couldn’t look at Niki without knowing she truly thought he would be so willing to side with Schlatt. Because Wilbur was dead, and Wilbur had been everything. Wilbur had been the embodiment of L’Manberg, and he had killed it, just as he’d killed himself. Because he was Fundy’s dad and Niki’s friend and he would rather destroy himself and the nation he had built than let them have it. Neither of them really knew who to blame or where to turn. But they didn’t turn to eachother. No matter how much their hearts ached and how they could read one another in a single glance, even now, they turned away. Fate had never been kind to them. They refused to give it one more thing to tear away.

    Even amongst the crowd after Dream had promised annihilation on L’Manberg, they didn’t speak to one another, didn’t make eye contact. And as the next day they watched their home, the place that bore every footprint and memory from their childhood, turn to rubble beneath their feet, they exchanged not a word, but a silent understanding as the two stood together and Niki herself burned the last roots they had to the doomed nation that would never again fail them as it had so many times before. Together they mirrored one of the men who had raised them, and saluted in heavy silence as a final goodbye.

    And with no more roots to hold them to a place they could no longer call home, Niki and Fundy parted. Niki tried to tell herself she didn’t care where Fundy had gone, and in time her moonstruck feelings were buried under the mountains of rage and grief and resentment that had piled on over the years with no true outlet. To Niki’s surprise, she found a companion who shared not just her resentment, but her childhood home-- it seemed that she and Jack shared a quartz-colored heart, so they claimed themselves a duo and started working together. It was nice. It was almost starfated. They shared goals and even acknowledged it as courting.

    But as Niki started to find herself and move on from the endless pain, no longer focusing on the harm of others but on the healing of herself, she found what everyone who seeks a cornerstone relationship eventually finds to be true: When resentment for the same thing is the only thing shared, there can never be true peace or trust or understanding between them-- not when one moves on and the other sits in their pain and anger. After a heartbreaking discussion, Jack and Niki ended their courtship, all the more pained for having known it as such. Niki’s pale heart sang for the loss of Jack, and she found herself missing the quiet understanding that she and Fundy, even at their worst, even angered to the core at one another, had shared. It was a feeling that could not be replaced. She ached for all she had lost, but knew she could not sit in her pain. She moved forward. She found ideals that suited her and were not thrust upon her. She harvested wheat, made flour, made dough. She baked.

-----

    Niki had stopped work on the city for the night, closing the door to her own living space within the cavern walls and sighing. She put a kettle on the stovetop, preparing to relax. Most of her day had been spent acclimating new refugees from other areas of the land into the city, cataloguing how many of the pre-made apartments had been taken and attempting to calculate what would need to go into the expansion. The city and citizens were getting used to one another, so to speak, and Niki was rather proud of how beautiful it all was. The only thing they really needed more of was chunks of ice; caves were kept at such a consistent temperature that any baking or cooking needed an outside interference, since they couldn’t just open a window to cool off their apartment. Niki was so wrapped up in her thoughts about the day that she almost didn’t hear the short, timid knock on her door.

    “Coming! I’m coming!” She called, rushing up to the door. In her defense, she hadn’t exactly been expecting visitors-- she opened the door and stood in minor shock-- especially not this one. “Fundy…?” Niki asked softly, surprise coloring her words. Ears flattened back against his head and fidgeting with his own padded fingers, Fundy stared at the ground, hardly even glancing up at her. “Hey, Niki.” She… she didn’t know what to say. This was the first they’d spoken to one another in what seemed like years. She knew what to do, though. Niki opened the door wider and stepped aside. “Please, Fundy, come in!” Fundy hesitatingly stepped inside-- he finally looked at her, and it was with such a pure expression of feeling lost that it made her almost want to take him into her arms, run her hands through his fur and soothe his aches-- a feeling that startled her, that she hadn’t felt since she broke off her alliance with Jack.

    She couldn’t bring herself to do that, though. It had been too long and there was too much unspoken. Instead, she decided on practicality. “What brings you here, Fundy? Do you need a home? We still have a few apartments that aren’t taken,” Niki said, attempting to anticipate his needs. “Nooo, it’s not that…” Fundy replied, drawing out his words, and Niki gave the fox hybrid a patient smile. He’d always had trouble articulating bad news-- that was okay. She didn’t have anywhere she needed to be for the rest of the night. She gestured to the sofa, and Fundy took a seat, sitting on the edge as if he didn’t belong and might need to bolt at any second. Niki was grateful she’d started making tea; there wound up being just enough for one cup each. She handed one to Fundy and his ears flicked in silent thanks.

    Niki sipped her tea as Fundy stared straight into his. “I wanted to find you because, well, I think… I think you should know.” Niki gave a soft questioning hum, encouraging him to continue. “So… y’know Wil… my dad… your friend… he died…” Niki frowned a little. If it had to do with Wilbur-- her heart ached, and she felt a kinship with Fundy in that moment. She knew. She did. “Yes,” Niki answered quietly, “I know. It’s been-- it’s been a long time since his death. It’s been hard. What happened, Fundy? Has something new come up?” Fundy’s yellow eyes flicked up and met Niki’s own, filled with grief and confusion. His gaze softened, remembering that they had, in fact, been-- almost been. He relaxed a little more into his seat, but he kept his hesitant and uncomfortable expression.

    Foxes don’t like to go in straight lines when they travel, and neither did Fundy like to speak in one. “So… something happened, at the prison, with Wilbur’s ghost… he was there with Tommy… and Dream…” Niki stiffened a little bit at both the names, and decided to hold off on her confusion about a ghost. “Because Dream has this revive book, right? So Dream… he threatened to Tommy to bring Wil back… apparently Sam fucked up…” Niki furrowed her eyebrows, desperately attempting to not become aggravated. It was a lot of non-information. “Fundy, what are you saying right now? What happened?” She asked, needing clarity. Fundy sighed, straightened up, and looked at her with a sudden focus to his gaze. “Dream… Dream brought Wilbur back. Wilbur is alive again. Tommy and Tubbo and Ranboo have all seen him-- I told Phil and I think he might be with him now.” He stared at Niki, tail twitching nervously.

    Niki was frozen. She held her teacup in a strange, mid-sip position, as if time for her had stopped before she took the action. “Wilbur is… back?” She asked, voice shaky in disbelief. “How?” Fundy shrugged helplessly. “I… the revive book, I guess. It’s real-- apparently Dream guinea pig-tested it on Tommy and it’s real. And now Wil is back. He’s alive again. Good ‘ole… Wilbur…” Fundy trailed off as it sank into both of them. Wilbur. God, what had he become? In Pogtopia? The dark ravine where the resistance gathered, the desolation that drove him to destroy his own home and force his father into an assisted suicide. Wilbur, when he had died, was not the man they knew and loved growing up in the safety of L’Manberg’s blackstone walls. Niki set her teacup down and watched it grow cold.

    Screwing together her eyes, Niki took a deep breath to steady herself and made a decision. She picked her teacup back up and took a sip-- it wasn’t yet lukewarm. Fundy, seeing her do so, did the same. “I don’t know how I feel about that,” Niki finally admitted. “Yeah,” Fundy agreed-- there in his voice was the telltale shake of an almost-laugh, done in nervousness, and it dawned on Niki that it was a family trait that he shared with Phil. “Phil will be happy, at least,” She posited, and Fundy agreed. “Yeah. He seemed hopeful. Wil-- he said Wil lied to him about the elections. I don’t really… know what that means.”

    Niki put a hand on Fundy’s shoulder. “Maybe… maybe you aren’t the only one who just wants his dad to be proud of him,” Niki offered with a small, empathetic smile. Fundy let out a very strange noise that was partly a sigh, partly a groan, and partly a sob. “I guess.” But she could tell he knew she was right. “Wilbur is…” Here, Niki tried to piece together her own thoughts. “Wilbur is a very complicated man with very complicated morals and relationships. He was our friend, and he hurt people-- but he was hurting too. I don’t know what death is like. I don’t know what being dead for so long would change him to be like.” Fundy, despite the somber mood, was relaxing a little-- and Niki, to her own surprise, found herself doing the same. He enthusiastically agreed with her description of complexity. It was definitely true.

    Niki took another big, courageous breath. One step at a time. She knew how to do this. “But if there’s anything I’ve learned lately, it’s that we cannot stop living our lives because of something like this. We can’t let ourselves become overwhelmed and paralyzed because of one big emotion. It isn’t good for us. It isn’t good for anyone.” Her grief, the loss of L’Manberg. The rage at Tommy and the feeling of entitlement, that if they just got an apology they could move on-- but not before that, never before that. The ache she felt, that shooting star that almost could have been before Jack sank himself so deep into rage it made him mad that she wasn’t drowning in it too. All of it came pouring out of her in that moment, like an overflowing cup that had finally finally been allowed to spill over. She might have been crying. Fundy’s eyes, too, shimmered with the same pain and understanding.

    “What do we… what do we do, then?” He asked, voice ragged as if he’d been holding back the tears that were now being blinked away for years (he had). “What do we even do? What can we do?” He nearly shouted it, desperation leaking from his voice. Niki sniffled, wiped away her eyes, picked up the empty teacups and brought them into the kitchen. Fundy followed, a familiar feeling to it all. “We can… well…” She set the cups down gently, turning to Fundy. He looked ready to listen to anything, about then. Gods above, the two of them had missed eachother more than they’d ever be able to put into words, huh.

    Suddenly, Niki smiled warmly, and Fundy picked up the nostalgia on her mind. “Do you remember, way back in the old days? When L’Manberg had its walls?” Fundy looked at her inquisitively, but his ears were perking slowly as realization started to find its way into his head. “I remember a lot of things from back then,” He said-- and it was true, they both did. The phrase pale danced around her head, the word starfate itched at her heart. “When I was stressed out,” She recalled, opening cabinets and drawers and handing things to Fundy-- who was arranging things in a specific way, but didn’t seem to realize he was operating on muscle memory or he would’ve known where she was going with it-- “Or when I wanted to create something. I would go down to the docks, because--”

    “Your bakery,” Fundy realized. “I do remember that.” Fundy looked down at his paws, realizing he was mid-measure and, subsequently, losing his place. “Oh god I think I fucked it up,” he muttered under his breath-- and Niki laughed, pleasant and happy. “You were doing fine, Fundy. It’s the last scoop of flour,” she reassured him. As Fundy muttered about the quality of the cake and Niki started measuring the other ingredients, she tried to clarify what she had initially been getting at. “For a long time, I was swallowed with anger,” she explained. “Anger about everything that had happened, because it was so unfair. But it wasn’t anyone’s fault. There was nobody to be angry at. The only person it was hurting was me.” And Jack. Jack’s own anger was hurting him, too. She swallowed down the broken shell of quartz that memory made her feel.

    “So you just… stopped being angry?” Fundy asked, genuinely trying to wrap his mind around it. Niki shook her head. “I don’t think it’s quite like that. I just needed to focus on myself, instead of what others had done. Do what I like and try to think for myself instead of just believing everything everyone else told me to.” What Wilbur had told her. What Wilbur had told them. She shook her head a little to clear her thoughts. L’Manberg had been good, but… it was never perfect. Not the way they were taught it was. “I guess I get what you mean,” Fundy said, and Niki felt enveloped by the sense of understanding that came with being with Fundy. He knew her just as she knew him, and even limited in their words they could communicate to one another what they meant. Even after all this time, it seemed they wouldn’t fall apart that easily, that they were two of the same according to fate.

    “It seems hard, though,” Fundy said, setting a glass bowl on the counter. Niki furrowed her eyebrows again thoughtfully. “It is hard. It’s better than being miserable all the time though.” Fundy jiggled the bowl as Niki poured the mixture, evening it out so it would cook properly. Fundy opened the oven door, and Niki slid the cake in. “I guess I am pretty tired of being miserable,” Fundy agreed with a hesitant chuckle. “That’s the spirit!” Niki exclaimed, grinning at him. Fundy laughed properly this time, three short bursts that sounded from his chest, and grinned back at her. “Hey, if you say so. It’s not much though. It’s really, really not.”

    “Nooo it’s good, it’s a good start! You have to start somewhere, Fundy,” Niki encouraged, and Fundy just shook his head, laughing ever so slightly. “I dunno, I mean… kinda hard to do when I don’t have a home and none of my friends talk to me anymore and Wilbur is suddenly alive again.” Niki looked at him sympathetically. “You could start by doing something that makes you happy. What do you like doing, Fundy?” Fundy stared awkwardly around the kitchen. “...Eating cake,” He offered with a hesitant giggle. Niki giggled in turn. “Well,” Niki said, “Lucky for you, if you stay here for a little bit you can do that pretty soon.”

    “I don’t know what I’m going to do after that,” Fundy said, turmoil in his heart too easily stirred, “But yeah. I’d like that.” He absently started wiping down the counter, old routine still embedded into them both, and Niki stared at him, gaze lingering for a moment. Looking at him now, she could see how his ginger fur didn’t shine the way it used to, how his ears were in a constant flicked-back state of distress. They’d both been uprooted when L’Manberg was destroyed, but it seemed he may have been left far more unmoored than she had. She wanted to groom his fur. She wanted to hold him until his tension was gone and his ears perked up bright and happy. She wanted to get rid of the ache in her chest and the ache in his. She wanted to get rid of the way her heart sang moonlit songs around him, despite it having been years. She wanted-- she wanted him to stay. Just for a little bit.

    Niki started to get out the frosting. “Stay here for a few nights,” she said unprompted, “In the city I mean. While you sort out your thoughts. I know I’ll need to sort out mine too. Maybe--” And here, she hesitated-- “Maybe we can try and sort them out together.” It was an invitation of vulnerability that neither of them had in a long, long time. Fundy stopped what he had been doing to stare at her; Niki vehemently ignored his gaze to continue focusing on the task at hand. He thought for a moment, and she hoped desperately he wasn’t thinking about the implications. “I’d like that,” he finally answered, quiet and truthful. “That would-- yeah. That would be nice.”

    “Well,” Niki said to fill the awkward silence that had sprouted after that, “One thing at a time. First you’re going to help me frost this cake when it’s ready.” Fundy laughed and agreed. And Niki thought about what she’d said to Jack, and what it had really meant. Baking again. Trying to heal despite it all. And she thought about the fox hybrid next to her, who, despite all his troubles, was baking too. L’Manberg was gone forever-- it was never coming back. Even if Wilbur did. And, well. Neither of those things had been quite what they had seemed. Places were gone and people had changed. Some for the better. Some for the worst. Some just… different, in inexplicable, unattainable ways. In ways that couldn’t be reached.

    But Niki was slowly realizing that not everything was gone. Fundy was still here, in her kitchen, baking with her. And in as many ways as she couldn’t figure out how to feel about Wilbur being alive again, she was grateful for one tiny thing about it. That it had brought Fundy to her doorstep. That she could share cake with someone who shared a quartz-colored heart with her. Maybe-- maybe it was fate.

    With the quiet hum of the oven being the only sound in the small apartment, Niki leaned against Fundy’s shoulder, feeling the soft fur of his neck against her cheek and hearing it squish against the fabric of his jacket. Fundy carefully put an arm around her and placed his chin on her head. “Yeah, I missed you too,” He murmured. Niki let out a heaving sigh and let herself sink into the warmth. And they still couldn’t call themselves starfated-- not after everything. Not yet. But for a moment, tucked away in a small apartment, hiding in the rising scent of cake and the warmth of an oven, they could feel it; they could know it. They understood one another. And, just like when they were kids-- for now, that was enough.

[purgemarchlockdown]

#i love hiw Anane states emotions and logic are different things#because it highkights out of all the prisoners she's the only one to fully comprehend what she did was logically wrong#yet emotionally fulfilling#despite stating in the portal timeline that her actions while not the best obes were still hers#magic highlights her regret showing that maybe if she just did things right they could have lived happily#purge march shows her justified rage at doing everything right taking her punishments and the sufferibg still not ending#and instead extending to the animal she loved#it's her anger and hate at the unending unfairness of it all#something that isn't helped by seeing all the people be forgiven outside of herself that din't even view taking a life as bad#as she clearly does tags by @archivalofsins

...Do you guys ever think about how in the T1 VD Amane clearly states how her crime was done partially out of hatred but Magic shows how it was also partially done for god and how in T2 VD Amane talks about how she did it for god but Purge March clearly depicts her doing it out of hate?

[mallowstep]

Twigpaw hadn't ment to overhear--she assumed Onestar thought the Thunderclan apprentice den was empty, and that's why he had attempted to talk to Mistystar so close to it. The minute after the Windclan leader's personal apology had dropped from his lips, an icy hiss had left Mistystar's.

"My youngest son is trapped as a prisoner due to your cowardice, Onestar. Because you were too ashamed to take care of your kits! Five of my warriors are dead, one of them being my other son's mate, leaving their young kits without a mother. Don't fucking apologize to me. Especially when both of us know Windclan was far more welcoming of outsiders when Tallstar was leader, and you knew he would have welcomed that queen and her kits into your clan. You brought this onto the clans! You did! If Reedwhisker dies, I assure you, I WILL take your remaining lives." The Riverclan leader had hissed, voice smooth as ice.

Twigpaw had never been quite so scared of the riverclan leader before in her life.

oh my god this is so good go OFF mistystar my beloved.

i think the scene in shattered sky is after reedwhisker is rescued? but i could b wrong, 0 memory of avos. regardless, regardless, more importantly, i just realized something.

skyclan doesn't know Shit about tigerstar? dang. so much potential but like. they wouldn't Know. this is when twigpaw is in skyclan i think? i don't remember? twigpaw bounces so much i stg. but either way like.

they're all in thunderclan's camp and most cats don't know, actually.

like. bramblestar and feathertail being angry at each other because "this isn't the time, feathertail" "when the fuck is, bramblestar?" and like. hawkwing is just. trying to figure out what the fuck happened.

"violetpaw do you know what's going on"

"dad i'm a child"

but also like -- riverclan and skyclan are now besties because they Fucking get it.

"a tyrant invaded your home?"

"yeah did urs kill a bunch of people?"

"yeah. did urs kill the deputy?"

"yeah omg let's be besties"

hnng. yes. leafstar sees what's up between mistystar and onestar. onestar hit a Deeply Personal Nerve. and maybe i don't know.

("Well, we need to work together. Now isn't the time to bring that kind of thing up," Tawnypelt says, her tail tip twitching against the ground. "He apologized. Do you want to get your land back or not?"

"Shut the hell up," Feathertail hisses. "You don't get a voice in this."

Violetpaw glances between the two of them. She's probably not supposed to be here, but she was looking for Twigpaw and now the only way out of the apprentice's den is to walk between them, and she thinks that would make everything worse.

"You can't -- he's trying to make up for this, Feathertail. And regardless of how you feel about it, we need WindClan to get RiverClan's territory back."

Feathertail scoffs. "Remind me, next time ShadowClan destroys RiverClan, to just not care about it."

Next time?)

and violetpaw would definitely try to track down who to ask about this. maybe she starts with alderheart? foster dad and all that.

("Did something happen between ShadowClan and RiverClan?"

Alderheart's whiskers twitch. "They've been at odds for as long as I've been alive. I think it's just -- one of those things."

Violetpaw sighs, but she sees Mothwing looking at them. The golden she-cat blinks a few times, then licks her shoulder. Alderheart follows her gaze.

"She might know about it." He licks her on her head. "You know I've missed you, right?"

Violetpaw's ears flick. Sometimes it's harder, to let herself think about what might have been.)

hm. mothwing would -- she didn't live through it, but,

("We've been enemies since before I was born," Mothwing says.

"Feathertail said next time. Like this wasn't the first time."

Mothwing sighs. "That was -- a long time ago. Feathertail was about your age." Her ears fold back slightly. "Mistystar never forgave Blackstar."

Violetpaw's nose twitches. "You're avoiding the point."

Mothwing takes a long, deep breath. "It's not a story I've had to tell for a long time, Violetpaw, and it's not a good story. ShadowClan -- has not had a good past. And this is the second time RiverClan has been the victims of ShadowClan's errors." She closes her eyes for a moment. "But -- there was a leader of ShadowClan who...convinced the leader of RiverClan to join forces. And he was responsible for a lot of hurt to my mother, and all of RiverClan."

Mothwing stands. "I want to go check on some of our cats.")

ah violetpaw. just trying to know. yeah. ironically, if someone told her the story like a fable, she'd probably relate to tawnypelt.

but at some point, someone should really explain to skyclan why shadowclan and riverclan are at odds.

(Squirrelflight is the one to take Leafstar aside.

"RiverClan and ShadowClan haven't agreed to anything in years," she starts. "So -- sorry about that. Tends to make a lot of decisions endless bickering." Her whiskers twitch.

"I noticed." Mistystar and Russetstar are on neutral enough terms, but as soon as someone suggests a course of action, they never end up on the same side.

"They've got history."

Leafstar takes a deep breath, trying not to let Squirrelflight's uncharacteristically meandering speech to irritate her.

"I just -- we just--" Squirrelflight takes a deep breath. "You should know. It was a long time ago, before I was born. Bramblestar was an apprentice. ShadowClan and RiverClan joined together, tried to force the other Clans to join them. But -- RiverClan had four known half-Clan cats in it at the time."

Leafstar's tail twitches. Being half-Clan seems entirely foolish to her. She has no "Clan blood," but she has nine lives and as many bones to pick with StarClan as the rest of them.

"Mistystar, Stonefur, Stormheart, and Feathertail," Squirrelflight says, and things begin to make sense. "RiverClan's never forgiven ShadowClan. Usually, we just try to keep them apart, but...")

i don't know what's going on i wanted russetstar but darktail would have to take over shadowclan a different way and look. that's not important. the important thing is u got me thinking.

[papers4me]

Fruits Basket, Se03. ep 7 (part 1)

Just to clarify, the only thing I didn’t like abt this ep is tohru, the rest is so good. kyo’s mental state is at its lowest & you can feel for him! ugh!, surprisingly akito’s own lid was so well-done!, Ren & shigure were epicly disgusting & fascinating!, kureno was so well-written, the final scene of tohru & kyo rightfully setting for the climax! Before moving on to the good part,  I’ll quickly go over why torhu’s character was once again the most inconsistent character in the show:

Ep,6 ending showed us a completely broken kyo in full display in front of tohru, best furuba cliff hanger to date hands down, followup: tohru laughing, cooking & wondering if kyo is asleep!!!. Complete detachment & extreme insensitivity to what she witnessed earlier. Not an ounce of wonder if kyo is okay or if sth is wrong with him. Not a single inner thought of “ I hope he’s okay” or “ oh momiji don’t call him, He’s a bit tired” while flashbaking to his traumatized face. Honestly, all they needed to do was a small quick inner thought to connect the scenes. No need to write new scenes. Alas, Tohru’s complete lack of compassion struck me deep. I was told ep6 ending was an anime original scene, I don’t mind any diversion from the original since I don’t know the it, but those writers who wrote a complete new scene didn’t feel the need to transition from it to the rest of the manga? really? It’s hard to believe.

Choosing the kitchen’s happy scene after of kyo’s nightmare is not bad as it shows that nobody either care or know abt his issues, fair enough. However, choosing the kitchen’s happy scene after the PTSD in tohru’s own bedroom & not modifying tohru’s happy go lucky, let’s cook yay face to a realistic concerned expression is absurd! It really takes plenty from tohru as a character. This comes after tohru’s long awaited background ep which returns tohru back to square one.

Just last ep, tohru opened her lid in front of kyo & he comforted her, While she still yet to overcome her fears, she failed miserably in doing the only thing that she’s been doing since se01, ep1, being compassionate & thoughtful. Oh well, adding a light scene in the midst of kyo & akito’s dark sequence is more important than tohru’s character consistency & growth.

moving on from tohru~~~

-Kyo’s suffocation: (guilty or not, it doesn’t matter)

we get kyo’s nightmare really gave me chills & was visually well-done. it brilliantly conveyed the feeling of suffocation, blinding fear, & intensified trauma. The nightmare’s horror vividly showcases kyo’s deepest insecurities & trauma:

It started with his mother’s “ it’s not your fault” sth kyo craved to hear from her very badly. Yet, it contradicted her action: Choosing death over staying with him.

His mother brings salvation: the cat’s cage. The cat’s room parallel’s kyo’s real life at his parents house. In se01, eo24, kyo said, he wasn’t allowed to play outside or watch TV, while his bracelet ”handcuffs”  were routinely checked by his mom. Just like a prison. His mom sentenced him in the new prison fitting for more horrible sins. The cat’s cage for the rest of his life.

While kyo looks panicked & horrified but on the verge to refuse, kyoko appears. “I won’t forgive you” solidifying his mom’s judgement.

They both warn him of the consequences of living & be forgiven: tohru’s death. Go on, kyo. Add one more victim to suffer in your behalf while you roam free. You might think that you can escape the cat’s cage but your hands remain dirty with blood. Others might not see the blood on yoyr hands, but YOU do.

Kyo is torn between being an actual sinner or a victim, between causing intentional harm or unintentional hurt, between being guilty or not. It all doesn’t matter & kyo knows it. What matter is the punishment has been going for years now & he’s tired, broken, lost & just wants it all to end. Death. Slow death in a tiny cage is so fitting for all the pain he caused others, for all the pain he suffered.

Kyo knows (a) suffering in front of tohru is hurting her. (b) Accepting her love will lead to hurting her: confessing of kyoko’s death. (c) Abandoning her is hurting her. (d) kyo knows that he doesn’t deserve her, not after he caused all this pain. (e) Above all, kyo can’t live with himself anymore. being close to her hurt so much.

-Akito’s lid: ( broken home & broken self image):

I must say they did an excellent job of presenting akito’s past! (a) It was a mixture of narration through (shigure & Ren), (b) actual animation of her parents causing her pain & traumatizing her (the scenes of Akira’s last words, her mom’s accusations), (c) Actual animation of the origin of her parents (Ren & Akira’s relationship), (d) akito herself confessing abt her pain in front of kureno. Tohru’s own lid on the other hands was presented through (a) excessive narrative with minimum animation (the grandpa’s endless exposition of tohru’s background quickly wrapped up), (b) no real animation of kyoko actually hurting tohru or how she did it, just again the grandpa narrating that kyoko “went away”. (c) tohru’s own self recall of her past being cut into pieces & divided throughout the ep, once after running from shigure & another in the sheet scene. Tohru’s ep wasn’t bad at all, it was good, but it was evidently shortened & summarized lazily. Oh well. What both eps serve is painting tohru & akito as foils of each other:

Both are attached toxicly to their parent. Tohru: kyoko & Akito: akira.

Both were welling to create a fake persona or an image that keeps this toxic love alive & cling to it no matter what.

Both hurt themselves the most & are struggling to let go of this bond.

Both have parents that hurt them. Akito: ren & tohru: kyoko, altho it is not clear how kyoko hurt tohru but kyoko is more a ghost than a real character.

Both cling to a dead object that represent their deceased parent. Tohru & the photo frame & akito & the box.

Kyoko existed to be this perfect mother with no sins, the character that tohru embodied to “fix” & “ heal all broken kids”. She lives only in memories. Even other characters think of her as this holy being. It is alluded Kyo seemed to know her as a real person who can commit mistakes, therefore, to kyo, kyoko isn’t an angel or a holy being. However, thanks to their encounter at her death & her “ I won’t forgive you” words, kyoko now is a haunting ghost to kyo. Akira on the other hand, existed as this sickly, pale & fragile head of the house, treated with so much aura & holiness. He died but his sins remain in how he raised akito.

Both must let go of their toxic bonds. Tohru of her deep attachment to her mom & akito to the zodiacs.

Both must learn to form healthier relationships.

However, there are striking differences between them! tohru never abused anyone nor attempted murdering someone by throwing’ em from a terrace, or locking them & torment them or stabbing them with a knife!! Tohru’s sin is torturing herself which by consequence tortured kyo, too. Cuz there’s is a theme of a loved-one’s pain is mine as well. Kyo’s mom hurt her own self & ended her own life. This resulted in her son’s years of immense pain, trauma & self-loath & similar suicidal tendencies, se0, ep16 “ I’ will yuki & then kill myself”, & se02, e9 “ mother, if only you killed me instead”. tragic.

Side Notes:

I will say this with a broken heart....... Tohru must learn to let go of.... kyo.  She is suffocating him. Not on purpose. I want them to be together! so bad! they’re so perfect for each other, but also, right now is NOT the time for this. Kyo & tohru’s character issues is NOT abt romance. They have real traumatic issues that are hindering their growth as independent characters. Tohru’s growth might not be well-written or well-presented, but kyo’s growth is still not explored. Next ep is where his lid opened! it must be painful. A person suffering from extreme self-loath & suicidal tendencies shouldn’t be presented so lightly in favor for the love cures all fairy tale! PLZ! NO!

Tohru must learn to not repeat her mistake again & live only for one person. She must let go of kyo in order to gain kyo back. Right now, She can’t have him! kyo is suffocated by his own trauma & adding tohru’s guilt on top of it is devastating. I mean, This could go differently & kyo might accept her love on the spot, & tohru might save him again or sth. I can see this being going deeper or shallower depending on the desired theme. Which of furuba’s heavy themes will be given to climax?

why is momiji doing a rabbit burger? he’s not cursed anymore. I know he’s keeping it a secret, but I thought momiji’s whole growth was abt letting go of the past. he still identifies with the zodiac rabbit?

Ren is hella sexy! & her Japanese VA deserves an Oscar! The way she expresses sexiness, seductive, anger, hate, contempt, sarcasm, delusional screaming, pain! EPIC!

“I thought I was created to receive others contempt” ugh! this hurt, kyo.

Shigure’s line abt looking at Ren to fantasize how akito will look if she were allowed to be a woman, ewww!!!! hella disgusting! imagine sleeping wth someone & fantasizing abt her daughter or vise versa!

Honestly, this ep while not excusing akito’s crimes & abuse of others, it did paint her in a human light. I really don’t want her to end up with shigure. Akito’s whole life is abt misunderstood love. Give her time to discover herself. A guy who slept with her mom is never a reasonable partner even if he loves her for eternity. but oh well~

Shigure indirectly caused Isuzu’s near death abuse by Akito. all in his attempts to free akito from the curse. I love how disgustingly selfish he is.  I remember his “ you mom told you to not interfere, kagura” in se03, ep3. shudder!!! if hiro never met haru that day & confessed to him, if kureno never noticed the maid! Still, he went & visited isuzu after her 4 moths imprisonment in the cat’s cage her hospitals discharge & recovery!

ngl... Shigure & Ren’s sexual tension is the biggest in furuba. Eww!

I’ll talk abt kureno & akito more in part 2. but I felt nothing watching kureno get stabbed lol. this is due to the trailer spoiling it & the ED having him happily in love -_-’.  bummer!.

I love tohru & kyo’s outfit in the ep cliff hanger. lol. Tohru really dressed up to confess.

Tohru read the room! Even if you magically forgotten how sickly & out of it he was in your room earlier, remember this: Kyo always have bad mood in the rain! Then again... he did hug her for the first time & called her by her name in the midst of a rainy storm. se01, e024. >_<!

[genderqueer-miharu]

so i'm looking into this milgram thing and i don't understand what happens to the people who are voted guilty vs. what happens to the people who are voted forgiven

Ok I don't know if you've watched all the mvs yet but tldr: according to the summary video for trial one, the innocent/forgiven prisoners have freedom of thought and their ideas are accepted and validated. It's also implied that they can ask for items from the outside world. The guilty prisoners on the other hand have their ideas rejected and are phisically restrained. This and their mental state starts to deteriorate as well. I'll go into more detail under the cut but there are spoilers if you haven't seen all the videos yet so be aware of that.

Being forgiven is basically like telling a prisoner that what they did was justified. Each prisoner will process this in different ways. Haruka and mu feel like they didn't do anything wrong, yuno hates her veredict and it made her more isolated, shidou feels conflicted on this, and kotoko thinks she has authority and permission from us to beat all the guilty prisoners. It's also implied that the innocent prisoners can ask for items from the outside world. You can see this in their trial 2 artworks: Mu asked for jewelry and in one of her answers she was thinking of asking for make up, shidou asked for medical supplies kotoko asked for weapons, and it seems like yuno is the one who asked for a weelchair for mahiru tho this is more speculation.

The guilty/not forgiven prisoners on the other hand have their ideas and thoughts rejected and are restrained phisically though it's never specified how this restraint happens, but it seems that the same invisible force that protects es when a prisoner tries to attack them is put on these prisoners, which is why fuuta and mahiru couldn't defend themselves from kotoko. It makes it so that they can't attack other prisoners but we don't know if this is all there is to it. The way the rejection of their ideas work is that they're basically able to hear the audience's thoughts and opinions on them, this is also never said, but in some of fuuta's and mahiru's conversations after being found guilty they mention how they can now hear voices of people condeming their actions and judging them, and beacuse of this their mental state also deteriorates. The only exception to this seems to be yuno who was voted innocent but was still able to hear people's thoughts about her but i think this might just be because she's more self aware than the rest.