#(also I don’t always dislike unrequited friends to lovers - it’s more about how the person with the crush reacts to being rejected

[cazshmere]

Synastry Observations Pt.2

materialist🔖

DISCLAIMER: These are just my personal observations and are meant for entertainment purposes only; it may not resonate with everyone due to the nuances of astrology. Please respect my work and avoid copying or stealing it. Enjoy reading!! 🍊⭐️

🍊 Mars in the 12th house synastry has got to be one of the worst things 😭. It’s confusing and exhausting. The Mars person seems to harbour some sort of irrational animosity towards the house person in a very passive-aggressive way. The house person can sense this too, but they are unsure if they’re making it up or not. Also, it’s such a blockage; you could be really close to each other and know of each other, but the conversation WOULD TAKE AGES to start because neither the house person nor the Mars person wants to initiate conversation. It’s like there’s an invisible barrier between you guys 🥲

🍊 Venus in the 8th house/ in Scorpio’s first romantic relationship or situation always ends up hurting them. I’ve seen this countless times where their first experience with romance either ends in heartbreak, unrequited love, or just a missed opportunity. This heartbreak helps these individuals immensely transform, and they might prefer to isolate themselves from anything romance-related for a long period of time. Honestly I think this is a canon event for every Scorpio/8th house Venus that I’ve met, including me lmao and especially if there are Venus-Saturn hard aspects, dear lord, sending love to all my scorp/8th house placements fr🫶🏻🥲❤️‍🩹

🍊 Something I’ve observed with Libra placements, especially the moon, is that when they’re in a relationship, it becomes the focal point of their life. They might go as far as changing career paths to be closer to their partner, altering their style to match their partner’s preferences, or adjusting their personality to be more appealing to their partner (yes I’m sure most of us do this to some extent but it’s a bit excessive for these peeps😭). Their relationship becomes such a central part of their identity that if anything goes wrong, it can feel devastating for them. For instance, I have a friend who is a Libra moon, and she always refers to her partner as “my boyfriend” instead of his name, even though we all know him personally, like gurl come on he’s got a name haha😭

🍊 Moon in the 12th house synastry can equate to the house person opening up to the moon person or just feeling extremely vulnerable around them. They’d share things with the moon person that they dare not share with anyone else. This synastry could also mean staying up late in the night and throwing your sleep away just to talk to each other 🧿

🍊 12th house synastry could also have undertones of enemies-to-lovers (the lovers part only if you ever get together, that is) because there’s this energy where you don’t know why the other person acts hostile/passive-aggressive towards you, ignores you, or sends you mixed signals that makes you dislike them but at the same time, you can’t stop fantasizing/dreaming about them in all these romantic scenarios or them showing up in your dreams outta nowhere like??😭

🍊 7th/8th and even 10th (to some extent) house synastry could indicate that one of the two, either the house person or the planet person (mostly the house person), copies the other, be it mannerisms, clothes, slang, or even certain traits of the other’s personality 💀. It’s because they notice how much attention or admiration the planet person garners, so to obtain that same kind of attention and recognition the house person might try to emulate the planet person 🫤

🍊 7th house Mars synastry can be very annoying and tiresome (especially for the house person). The Mars person could be a bit too much for the house person. The Mars person could get very petty and passive-aggressive towards the house person for no reason (this could go vice versa too). Yes there is sexual attraction and y’all could motivate/support each other through stuff but at the same time it’s draining asf, a big no no for me when it comes to synastry 🥲

🍊 Moon square Saturn synastry can cause delays when it comes to emotional attachment between two people, but once these two finally connect, it’s ride or die typa relationship fr 🥺🫂

🍊 Moon/Mercury in the 1st/5th/9th house synastry is very exciting and fun-loving, with lots of playful teasing and bantering with each other 😋🥰

🍊Moon /Mercury in the 2nd/4th/8th/10th/12th house synastry makes both parties very sensitive to each other’s words because these houses reflect our self esteem/self worth, the deepest parts of ourselves, our core, our reputation etc. A little bit of critique can also be taken personally by either party. Even harmless jokes could be taken in the wrong way and arguments could occur (especially if there isn’t 3rd/5th/9th/11th house synastry or any easy aspects in the synastry chart)

🍊 When someone's planets fall in your 8th house, they intuitively sense your true and deep needs related to that planet. For example, if someone's Venus is in your 8th house, they will know how to love you in a way that makes you feel unconditionally loved and appreciated. If their Mercury is in your 8th house, they will understand how to communicate with you on a profound level, meeting your need for deep and meaningful conversation. If their Mars is in your 8th house, they will instinctively know how to meet your sexual needs and desires and please you in bed🖤❤️‍🔥

© cazshmere 2024 [All Rights Reserved]

banner credits : @anitalenia <3

[deathsweetblossoms]

7 for the ask 💙🌙🍂

I really had to stop and meditate on this one for a second because I’ve read some romances recently that made me realize how much my tastes have changed over the years.

What kind of common romance tropes do you enjoy and what kind do you dislike?

Friends to Lovers — I hesitate to list this as a favorite anymore because it can so easily go off the rails. Friends to Lovers almost always includes Other Man/Other Woman tropes while the aforementioned Friends figure out their feelings for each other which I’m not necessarily a fan of. Sometimes it can get a little too melodramatic, but other times it really worked for me like in People We Meet on Vacation or Love & Other Words. Similarly, there’s an absolutely gorgeous Katniss/Peeta modern AU fanfic called Love Is… that contains just the right amount of angst, coupled with a beautiful, tender, emotional friendship between Everlark and really highlights the strengths of the trope for me.

Pen pals/Epistolary — perhaps it’s just the inherent romance of epistolary communication or the fact that I’ve had so many long distance relationships, but man do I love pen pals or any form of love letters. Some of my favorite pen pal romances have been Divine Rivals, The Flatshare, Hana Khan Carries On, and The Guernsey Literary & Potato Peel Pie Society. Honorable mention to the love letters in Red, White, & Royal Blue and these fanfics: Fauxmance, a Dramione fanfic that consists of a majority of text-versations but the banter is incredible, and The Snowflake Effect, which is also Dramione.

Forced proximity/innocent cohabitation — I don’t even know WHY but if I consider a good chunk of my favorite ships (Elorcan & Feysand, for instance), some manner of “oh damn now we have to team up” happens. Then they fall hard and I eat it up every time?? I have no explanation, I’m sorry.

Rejected by former lovers/family — I only recently realized that I go nuts over characters who follow this journey to finding their ride or die true love, who chooses them over and over again. Notable examples are Jacks of OUABH and Cardan from TFOTA.

Sworn off romance — another recently realized favorite, but I do really love it when one or both characters have given up/sworn off/aren’t particularly interested in romance and then they find their person. Emily Wilde’s Encyclopaedia of Faeries has this in spades.

Everyone can see it — I think this is more of a subcategory but I go absolutely feral when everyone can see that two characters are in love with each other while those said characters are in denial. It’s ALWAYS a fun time. It ALWAYS makes me lose my shit. Give me ALL the “everyone can see it” storylines.

As for things I don’t enjoy… it’s tricky to say because I can be talked into almost anything. For instance, I never thought I’d like an amnesia story, and then I read mightbewriting’s Wait and Hope and my entire life was changed. (But I’m not sure I would enjoy that in a contemporary romance book). Similarly, I’ve never been a fan of one night stand, surprise pregnancy storylines but Out on a Limb was one of my coziest reads of the year. I can say I don’t like any manner of cheating or unrequited love. I’ve also never been particularly keen on billionaire romance, love triangle, “you’ve changed” (where the story revolves around a couple on the rocks but they work it out).

Phew!! This turned into .. an essay 🫣 Wow! I really like talking about stories, apparenrly 😂

Thank you!!! 🫶🏼🫶🏼

[natlover4ever]

My ships are almost never endgame bc I usually prefer the less popular ships.

I seriously love ships that are more compatible & similar to each other (and wholesome & sweet to each other), than opposites attract or a ship that’s unrequited until the other person “finally” changes their mind. I usually find those ships toxic (not judging anyone for shipping them though) and people find my favorite ships boring lol.

Like this is my list compared to the popular (and usually endgame) ships:

-Stalia over Stydia

-Cordueva over Jafael

-Matlingsworth over Zaya

-Callie/Aaron over Brallie (not endgame thankfully bc they’re siblings) and currently hating the popular but politically opposite Callie/Jamie. Although Aaron also got kind of toxic during the AJ love triangle, so I’m hoping she finds someone new in Good Trouble.

And the show is still going but:

-Zimon over Zoemax

Any time a character (usually a guy) gets angry at his friend (usually a girl) for not being with him or for dating someone else, I immediately stop shipping them. It feels possessive, not romantic.

I don’t like the “dogged nice guy” trope, so that’s why I only like friends to lovers when the feelings are mutual, not when one person is pining for years.

Again I respect all shippers and understand wanting more excitement in a ship, but I notice a pattern of which ships I prefer and which ones I can’t stand 💀

To add to this, this is why I don’t automatically ship friends to lovers. It depends on the situation. If it’s mutual pining, I ship it, or if one person has a crush but accepts rejection and staya friends, then I’ll ship it (or enjoy it as a friendship). But if the person with a crush responds to rejection with anger (which Zig, Brandon, Max, and Rafael have all done imo), I get whiny “friend zone” vibes and won’t ship it lol. Stiles I think was a good example of handling rejection, but I enjoyed their friendship and loved Stalia a lot so it was hard for me to appreciate stydia.

[anlian-aishang]

hello! i have a priority request: Bad day/hard times. i don’t want to go into too many details cause i feel dumb but basically i caught feelings for guy and he doesn’t really return them, even though i thought he did. Can i get Levi or Erwin comforting reader about a bad date with a happy ending? i hope that’s specific enough, i understand if it’s not. it’s also alright if you post it publicly to the blog.

thank you so much!!

Aww, I’m so sorry to hear about your hard times! We have all had a love unrequited, so just know you are not alone &lt;3 I hope this priority request can help a bit ^^

Word count: 1000 Tags: erwin x reader, fluff, modern AU, pining, friends-to-lovers, food mention, gn!reader

On paper, it should have been a perfect match. Taste in music was the same, playlists practically identical. You had seen all the same movies, liked and disliked the same ones. Over the phone, you had shared many late nights - dimming your screen, talking low - just so you could make the most of your days. Chatting before the date, you could not wait to meet him. 

But even as you sat across from him, admiring the outfit he wore and the bill he paid, you were thinking about the postmortem. It wasn’t that the date was bad on its own, but given all the build-up there had been, that was what really killed it. Not bad, just disappointing. 

Yeah, he said all the right things. Here, let me take your jacket. You look so beautiful tonight. It’s great to finally meet you in person. All his sentiments made you glow. 

But it wasn’t the feeling you got with Erwin. 

// // //

Back at your apartment, Erwin tried to keep himself preoccupied. It was a day he had been dreading. All the times he heard you locked in your room late at night, chatting and giggling with the stud on the other end of the line, it was the only thing that could turn your angelic voice agonizing. Your nights spent as roommates, as friends, grew fewer and fewer - as you chose your cell over him. 

He had exhausted all the coping strategies he could think of, and for a man of his wits, they were many. Timing his hangouts to overlap with your dates. Buying an expensive pair of noise-cancelling headphones. No matter how diverse his topics of conversation were, you always somehow managed to tie it back to your developing relationship. He’s so thoughtful, so funny...

When you went on and on about your newest match, Erwin learned to detach just enough. Uncharacteristically delusional for the man so ever composed - how he could hear himself in the words you spoke. He’s six feet tall. Drives a Mercedes. Works in finance. Erwin bit the inside of his cheek. Didn’t you hear yourself? Couldn’t you see? The man of your dreams was not in your future, but in your present. This very Saturday evening, awaiting your return home safe. 

Erwin tilted his head back against the wall, palm pressed to his forehead, and allowed himself an audible sigh. Others found him so put-together, but there was one who had worked their way into his home, his heart, his most vulnerable spots, and could truly unravel him. Everyone else named him the smartest guy they knew, but he thought himself so stupid - for signing that lease with you, for thinking you could just be friends, for believing that his feelings would ever disappear. Erwin thought your habits of leaving mugs all around and piling laundry sky high would make him realize that you weren’t the one, but instead, the opposite. He longed to wash your dishes. He longed to fold your clothes. He wanted to be that person - Erwin clenched his fist - and no one else. 

However, his own obstacle remained: he could hardly admit it to himself, let alone confess it to you.

And so, that was how he found himself here again. Sitting on the couch, waiting for you to come back, prepared as possible to hear you gush about this incredible date and this incredible guy. 

But this time was different, and though he had not expected it, he was more than ready for the surprise you brought.

// // //

He could tell just by the way you opened the door. The key was lazily pushed into the lock, the door slowly nudged open. On the front mat, you toed off your shoes and hung up your coat. A far cry from the enthusiasm you left with. 

Earlier than expected, too. Erwin checked his watch. Only 7:30, you had left at 6:00. Must not have been that great, but don’t let yourself jump to conclusions. He had done so and fallen many times before. He fumbled for the TV remote and flipped whatever on, covering up the evidence of how long he had sat here daydreaming.

When you turned the corner, your hair was undone, your outfit disheveled, as if you just didn’t care anymore. Still, as always, he found you beautiful. “Hey,” a strained smile, “everything alright?”

“Eh,” you shrugged, tossing your wallet and keys onto the coffee table, indifferent. “Coulda been better.”

Erwin pinched himself, attempting to subdue his dire curiosity. A desire to hear all the date’s shortcomings juxtaposed with his compassion - not to make you run it back. 

His lips parted, preparing to speak, but you closed your eyes and unknowingly cut him off, “Can we just - have a roomie night?” Hand scratched the back of your neck, his breath caught in his throat, “The two of us? It’s been too long.”

The only man you could rely on. The one who would always be there for you in whatever way you needed him. Sitting through junk TV and three-hour documentaries, never complaining. Playing video games together, always knowing when to let you win and when to give you a challenge. Tonight, he once again composed your perfect care package. Homemade popcorn, organic smoothies, a Netflix marathon. Transporting you from sadness to happiness - the song of your laughter filling the room - that was how it was supposed to be.

Over the night, your jokes and giggles were spaced more sparsely apart. Erwin began to worry that your dating woes were overtaking your thoughts, but instead, he leaned over to find you soundly asleep. Your head had landed just beside his thigh, your arm draped over the edge of the sofa, parallel to his shin. A blush complemented his pale skin, blonde hair, but he departed before you had the chance to see it - just to bring you the pajamas he had just gotten done folding and a fresh mug of sleepy tea. 

It was his greatest joy - to be what you needed: roommate, friend, a distraction to all those disastrous dates. Any of those roles, it was his honor to fulfill. And someday, you would realize, that there was no use in meeting potentials - for the whole package was already in your hands and wrapped around your finger. 

// masterlist //

[krappykawa]

ಌ i mildly like you more than like (p.2)

— in which an incessant fan girl, a kiss, and a little bit of denial makes oikawa tooru realize he might mildly like you more than like

description. you’ve been in love with oikawa tooru for longer than you can remember. having known him for the better part of nearly 11 years, you’ve come to accept that you’ll never be more than a best friend to him. but with the help of a few irritatingly persistent fangirls and a kiss that was only meant to drive them away, a tale of unrequited love might just prove to be something more. 

warnings. language

word count. 3.6k

oikawa x f!reader, childhood best friends to lovers, fluff, some angst

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6

It’s just really bad timing for Oikawa that the day after is the day in which the Aoba Johsai third-years planned their monthly hangout. 

He’s rocking back and forth in front of your house, trying not to let the weird feeling in his stomach eat at him. He hasn’t seen you since you both walked home the day before when he was secretly cursing the sun because “did you always look like you were heaven-sent or was it just the lighting?”

In his head, he’s trying to convince himself that he didn’t avoid you this morning - that the reason he didn’t spend the day over at your house before your hangout like he’d always done was because he would see you later anyways. He tries to say that it's because he just needed some time to recharge, which isn’t necessarily false, but it’s a half-truth all the same. 

“Hey.” His head turns to where you’re standing in your doorway, already smiling up at him. “Where’s that outfit from? Iwaizumi’s closet?”

Oikawa looks down at himself. He’s wearing one of the hoodies he did indeed steal from Iwaizumi a few months ago, and he had also opted for a pair of grey sweats that he haphazardly picked out without notice. He did have to admit that it was a very Iwaizumi-style outfit.  “Only the sweatshirt, Y/N-chan. Don’t tease,” he says with his usual chipper voice. 

You shake your head at him, and the small movement draws his gaze to the small alien earrings that dangle from your ears. He wants to ask if you could help him find a plush-sized version of that alien to add to his own plushie collection (that only you and Iwaizumi know about), but by the time he’s opened his mouth, you’re already turning to lock your door. 

You hand him a piece of candy that you had in your pocket and you both begin to walk in a slightly off silence to Iwaizumi’s house. There isn’t necessarily anything uncomfortable about it, but Oikawa’s blinking to himself because you don’t seem to be fazed in the slightest about the happenings of yesterday. Best friends must kiss their best friends all the time don’t they? That’s why you don’t seem to care. He doesn’t care. No, he doesn’t. 

Oikawa practically breathes a sigh of relief when Iwaizumi joins you two. He knows that if you were alone for even a moment longer, you would’ve picked up on his odd mood and asked him what was wrong. He wouldn’t have an answer to that. Not that there was anything wrong. There wasn’t.

Once Iwaizumi joins you two, Oikawa doesn’t have much time to be within his own thoughts because he and Iwaizumi quickly engage in a friendly teasing argument about the day before. You simply walk between them, piping up at times to tease Oikawa for some reason or another. It feels entirely too normal, and Oikawa isn’t quite sure how to feel about that.

“My legs are killing me,” you say after walking for about two miles, mostly due to the fact that Oikawa and Iwaizumi were having another back-and-forth that was slowly getting out of hand. “Did Matsukawa and Hanamaki really have to choose a place so far away? Actually, scratch that. Did you two really have to make us walk?”

“Suck it up, my darling Y/N-chan, we’ve only got a few more blocks to go,” Oikawa says. He notices a soft redness on your cheeks. 

“You’re one to talk,” you mumble. “You were complaining just ten minutes ago,” 

“I’m allowed to be whiny.”

“No, you aren’t.”

“But Y/N-channn.” He makes sure to really draw out the latter half chan, his grin widening when he sees a slight pout form at your lips. 

“Don’t Y/N-chan me when you’re being a baby.”

“You can’t call me a baby! I’m practically a tree next to you!”

You cross your arms, and look defiantly up at him. “I’ll call you a baby if I want to.”

“I’m gonna throw you over my shoulder if you don’t take that back.”

“God you two are insufferable,” Iwaizumi mumbles from besides you two, but the small smile on his face betrays his attempt at strictness. You playfully roll your eyes at him and Oikawa is unfazed, much too used to Iwaizumi’s gruff exterior by now. “I’ll just carry her if it makes you two shut the hell up.”

At the same time that you shout “Really?”, Oikawa shouts “No!”

Both you and Iwaizumi turn to stare at Oikawa, who seems to lose his composure just ever so slightly. 

“Shittykawa, for the last time. I’m not going to carry you.”

“That’s not what I meant, Iwa-chan.”

“Then what is it?”

“I’ll carry Y/N-chan.”

Iwaizumi’s gaze focuses just a beat too long on Oikawa, and it’s all Oikawa needs to see to know that Iwaizumi will probably be watching him a little extra tonight. He always does that when he feels like there’s something off. 

Whatever he must’ve seen on Oikawa’s face was either satisfactory or something that puzzled him because he repents instead of interrogating him. “Fine. Carry her if it’ll heal your ego or whatever. Just don’t do shit to your knee or I’ll actually murder you.”

“Guys, it’s fine. I was only joking.” You pipe up, clearly confused at the interaction between Oikawa and Iwaizumi just now. Oikawa can feel something else in your gaze too, but he’s afraid he won’t be able to look away if he attempts to analyze what it means. 

Something in Oikawa deflates a little at your words though. You seemed all but ready to let yourself be carried by Iwaizumi, but the moment he suggested doing the exact same thing, you shied away. “Well the offer still stands,” he says, despite the minor sting of rejection. “Besides it’ll make up for the practice I was forced to miss yesterday.” 

“Really, it’s fine. I don’t want you to hurt your knee,” you reply. This time, he can practically hear the odd something in your voice. The fact that he can’t pinpoint what it is irritates him to no end. 

The rest of the walk to the karaoke place goes relatively quiet. Quiet in the sense that Iwaizumi and Oikawa don’t squabble, but rather all three of you have small minor conversations about anything and everything. 

Oikawa’s mood turns mildly sour when you tell him and Iwaizumi that by some unfortunate luck, you’d crossed paths with your ex-boyfriend while on a walk that morning. He wishes that he would’ve just sucked up his thoughts and just spent the day at your house so that maybe by some weird string of fate, you wouldn’t have seen the tall, brown-haired baseball captain while on a walk. Oikawa didn’t realize he was scowling until you poked a finger at his cheek and told him that he “had to stop thinking about Kageyama and Ushijima because they would only cause premature wrinkles and ruin his pretty face.” He doesn’t tell you that his two most bitter rivals were far, far away from the forefront of his mind at the moment. 

“Took you three long enough,” Hanamaki practically yells when he spots you three from across the street. 

You beam and yell, “Don’t yell, Maki. It’s unbecoming!”

“And you call me a hypocrite, Y/N-chan?” Oikawa nudges your side, smiling down at you. 

The feeling he gets when you stick your tongue out at him and dash across the street is familiar, which he’s thankful for. It’s the sort of feeling that makes him smile softly at your retreating figure, a feeling that he’s felt toward you for as long as he can remember. He’s happy for the familiarity of it because it gives him a sense of normalcy that perhaps the thoughts he’s been feeling are familiar thoughts that were probably just jumbled up because of his fatigue. 

That’s what he keeps telling himself anyway. 

Oikawa’s about to run after you when Iwaizumi asks a question from beside him. “Did something happen between you two?”

Oikawa turns to look at his best friend then back to where you’re standing with Hanamaki and Matsukawa. We kissed, he thinks. But Oikawa knows that telling Iwaizumi that might be more trouble than he’s looking for right now because he’ll surely start asking questions that Oikawa can’t even begin to find an answer for. 

“No,” he tries to say in his most convincing voice. “Why?”

Iwaizumi shakes his head. “Y/N just seems sadder today.” His words almost make Oikawa stop midway on the street. He knows that Iwaizumi notices, but instead of calling him out on it, Iwaizumi says, “Probably just because she saw Kaoru-san this morning.”

That’s when Oikawa realizes that the odd tone he heard in your voice earlier was sadness. He isn’t sure why exactly that was and why it was directed towards him. He can’t remember you saying anything out of the ordinary. All your texts to him that morning were of nothing new, and nothing seemed wrong the day before (except for the way that you were equally as quiet as he was during the walk home after your kiss). Surely, it wasn’t because of the stupid baseball player that barely lit a flame next to you.

He doesn’t know what he hates more - the possibility that it was him himself that was the cause of your sadness, or the possibility that you were sad after seeing your ex-boyfriend, which could possibly mean that you might still harbor feelings for him (which, Oikawa decides is something he never wants to think about again because he’s always disliked Kaoru, so he really can’t see why you’d still have feelings for him). Surely, you weren’t still hung up on a boy that you had broken up with? 

That’s what break-ups are for. They’re for when you no longer have love for the other person, or with Oikawa’s history of dating, when you find that the other person’s demanding schedule is something that becomes a wedge. 

It’s odd, but for the first time in their long friendship, Oikawa wants to punch Iwaizumi for making him think so indepthly about it. Instead, he walks quicker. He makes sure that his signature chipper smile is on his lips when he greets Hanamaki and Matsukawa. 

“What do you two have lined up for us today then?”

“We’re hoping that you’ll embarrass yourself with some karaoke, and then we figured we’d look through some of the shops around here. That may or not be because my mother’s birthday is in two days and I have yet to get a present.”

You shake your head at the taller male. “Makki!”

“Don’t Makki me! It’s Mattsun’s fault anyway. Don’t ask me why. It’s just always Mattsun’s fault.”

Matsukawa looks anything but pleased. “One more word out of you and I’m leaving your ass here and you’ll have to ride home by yourself.”

The only response Hanamaki has is a scowl in Matsukawa’s direction. 

By the time you five are seated in a booth, Oikawa feels the most normal he’s felt all day. Hanamaki managed to offend an older lady walking down the street by saying something loudly obnoxious, Iwaizumi yelled at Hanamaki for being so stupid, Matsukawa almost choked on a mint he had taken fron the front desk, and you had accidentally almost broken a vase because you pushed Oikawa a little too roughly. Oikawa would say that all that was pretty normal. 

It’s also normal for Hanamaki to suggest that you and Oikawa sing a duet because despite it all, you two have incredible voices. He used to try and convince Iwaizumi too, but when almost all his pleas were met with rejections, he’d eventually stopped asking. 

But Oikawa doesn’t feel any sort of normalcy when he smiles to himself as you shake your head and begrudgingly accept. He doesn’t feel any sense of normalcy as you take his hand and tug him upwards to the karaoke machine. Instead of the normal carefree environment he usually feels, he’s feeling something brew inside of him because everything he’d just described as feeling abnormal, used to be perfectly normal. 

It irritates him to no end because his feelings don’t feel any different, but at the same time his feelings feel so incredibly foreign that he wishes he could just pause time and just sit down to figure out whatever the hell is going on. 

But he doesn’t have the ability to pause time, and he doesn’t have any time to figure out anything before you start to sing and he feels his breath catch the way it always does. 

He’s always told you that your voice was angelic. He’s been saying it ever since he came over to play at your house when he was 10 years old and he overheard you singing as you doodled on a piece of paper. He’s told you all of this before - how beautiful your voice is, how you’re wasting your talent by not letting others see it. He even remembers begging you to sing him to sleep when he would sleep over at your house after particularly crushing losses. 

What he doesn’t understand is why he’s so very aware of the fact that your voice sounds like it descends from above. Before, the feeling was there like a natural instinct to hearing your singing voice. But now, he’s so very aware. 

It’s because of this thought process that he almost misses his cue to enter. Luckily, he feels a foot kick at his ankle just before he embarasses himself. Oikawa has a gut feeling that it was Iwaizumi who did so. 

Once he starts singing the lyrics, Oikawa has the thought to just murder Hanamaki on the spot because of all the duets he could’ve chosen, he had to choose a love song. 

He keeps his eyes glued to the words flashing on the screen despite having memorized every lyric of this song after singing it multiple times while taking a shower. He tries to ignore your voice and instead focus on the teasing remarks slipping from his teammates’ lips. For a second, he’s successful in doing so. 

But luck doesn’t seem to be on his side tonight. Eventually, you hit a very impressive high note and Oikawa thinks he might just lose his mind because he hears you laugh afterwards and say a breathy “sorry,” that’s so mesmerizing that he turns his head. You’re already smiling up at him in that way that you always smile at him and he can’t help but feel his own lips tug widely upwards. He thinks he imagines how your own smile widens after that. 

After you two finish your duet and Hanamaki is up and belting out all the wrong notes, you nudge Oikawa. “A little off considering how good I can hear you singing it in the shower.”

“Keep your voice down, Y/N-chan. One word out of you and I won’t speak to you for a week,” Oikawa says with the familiar grin on his face. 

“You wouldn’t dare,” you dramatically gasp, which momentarily catches Iwaizumi’s attention. He turns away once he realizes that you were looking at Oikawa and nothing of importance. 

“Oh, but I would.”

“You wouldn’t last a day.”

“Yes I would.”

“You used to cry whenever Iwaizumi or I went on vacation. You’d come whining to me before the day is even over.”

He’s about to retort a reply, but Hanamaki’s return to the table catches both of your attention. “Man, my voice sounds like sandpaper.”

“More like a dying baby bird but I’ll let you think what you want,” Matsukawa snorts from his seat. 

“Mattsun, what did the baby bird ever do to you?”

After a few more rounds of karaoke (in which Matsukawa and Hanamaki serenaded the other and Iwaizumi agreed to sing for the first time in months) you all find yourself at the head of a row of shops that go down a few miles. 

“Do you think my mom would like a necklace? Maybe I’ll buy her a book.”

“Hanamaki, you are aware that we aren’t acquainted with your mother right?”

“Matsukawa is! Mattsun, help me out here.”

“Makki, she’s your mom man.”

After a few more rounds of bickering, Hanamaki and Matsukawa finally decide to just head into the bookstore. You, Iwaizumi, and Oikawa decide to visit the small trinkets store with the twinkling light up sign. 

Oikawa gets the urge to rip his hair out once he sees who the person behind the cashier is. 

“Kaoru! I didn’t know you worked here,” you say entirely too nicely. Oikawa hates how perfect you look at the moment because he’s almost certain that your ex-boyfriend notices it too.

“Ease up, Shittykawa,” Iwaizumi says from beside him. 

“I am at ease,” he says, but he can’t even convince himself. 

Iwaizumi snorts and shakes his head. “Sure you are. Unclench your jaw and stop looking at him like you want to stuff him in a bag first, then I’ll believe you.”

Oikawa turns his head to look back to where you’re leaning against the counter. He doesn't miss the way that Kaoru purposefully left his hand idly on the counter so that his fingers come just short of touching your arm. Oikawa feels his annoyance spike when he hears the man in question laugh at something you say. 

After glaring what felt like forever, Oikawa turns back to Iwaizumi, letting out an annoyed huff. “I just don’t understand why he of all people had to be the one working here.”

“The world doesn’t cater to whether or not the person working at a store is going to make you jealous,” Iwaizumi says as he shuffles through a rack of plain-looking hoodies. 

“I’m not jealous!”

Iwaizumi turns to Oikawa and deadpans at him, raising a brow as a challenge. 

Oikawa looks away from his gaze and crosses his arms. “I’m not,” he grumbles. “I just don’t particularly like his face or his voice or his stupid personality or really anything about him because really what’s there to like? It’s nothing new.”

Oikawa expects a retort or an insult, but to his surprise, Iwaizumi lets out a laugh. 

“What’s so funny?”

Iwaizumi continues to shake his head as he moves to walk down another aisle. Oikawa follows aimlessly behind him. “You’re so, so stupid. I cannot believe you’re one of the best volleyball players I know. There’s no way you’re the same person I play with on the court.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I think I’ll let you figure that out for yourself.”

Before Oikawa can question him any further, he hears your voice from somewhere across the shop. You pop your head out from behind a shelf and say, “Hey ‘Kawa! Come here for a second.”

Oikawa looks to Iwaizumi. 

“Go ahead. I’m gonna look through their collection of posters and see if I can find one for the monster movie I watched yesterday.”

When Oikawa gets to the shelf that you’re staring intently at, he’s mildly surprised. You’re crouched down and scrutinizing a row of alien plushies. More specifically, they’re the very same alien plushies that he had hoped to ask you about when he first picked you up from your house.

You grin up at him excitedly and Oikawa wishes he could take a picture. “Look what I found!” Oikawa walks closer and crouches down besides you. You turn to look at him again. “I noticed that you were staring at my earrings a lot tonight, and I know that you absolutely cherish your little alien collection, so I asked Kaoru if they had them as plushies and they did!”

Oikawa feels a warmness bloom in his chest at your excitement. He doesn’t tell you that he wasn’t staring at your earrings. He doesn’t tell you that he was always staring at you.

“You did that for me?”

“Of course I did. We always do things like this, don’t get all sappy now.”

He has the sudden thought to just pull you upwards and crash his lips into yours. He knows that he can’t necessarily do so, so he just stares at you instead and contemplates to himself if it really would be so bad if he just kissed you again right then and there. 

“Is everything okay? Do you not like it? We don’t have to get it if you don’t like it.” The smile falls off your lips, and he can hear that familiar sadness in your voice once again. It sends a spark of pain through him. 

“No!” He yells a little too loudly. “No, of course I love it. Thank you.” He reaches out and clasps his hand over your smaller one. 

You roll your eyes at him, but don’t make any move to push his hand away. “You’re blushing! Don’t blush! You might make me think that you’re in love with me, and we can’t have that can we?”

Oikawa tries to shake his head. He doesn’t point out that there’s a little dusting of red on your own cheeks. 

He only speaks again after you pick an alien off of the shelf and stand up. He stands with you. “I only very mildly like you more than like. None of that in love stuff, don’t worry.”

You elbow him and shoot him a glance. “Don’t steal my lines, Oikawa.” 

You smile as you say it. A simple smile. A smile that has practically been ingrained into his head after so many years of seeing that same smile thrown in his direction. But what scares him is the way that it sends a pleasant feeling to his stomach. 

It’s then that Oikawa realizes that there is indeed something that’s wrong - that there’s something very, very wrong. Something is very wrong because everything he’s feeling at the moment makes him think that maybe, just maybe, he’s the biggest liar in the world for claiming that he wasn’t in love with you.

i know that some people won’t be able to relate to the “angelic singing” part (i most definitely don’t have an angelic singing voice either lol don’t worry) but lets all just pretend that we can all sing ok thanku

[evitachristine]

Anti-Hophie Rant

So I finally finished reading One True King, and this is what I have to say. It’s long. 

WILL CONTAIN SPOILERS!

Before I get into this, just a small warning: If Hophie is your OTP and embodiment of perfection, this text is not for you. I will not argue with anyone, alright?

To start this off, in my opinion OTK is the weakest of the series. It just feels like a connection between the last book and the fact that Tedros has to become the King. Some might argue that the second book was the worst, well, I disagree. It’s not just because Hophie happens here, but I kind of believe that when the internet spoiled to me that my hated ship was going to happen (because I had to wait until the book comes out in my country), I was expecting more from it. That I would actually be convinced it’s meant to be, which didn’t happen. Also the execution of some characters (Ahem...Merlin) was just...why. It seemed to me that there were a lot of other fan services in this book, apart from Hort and Sophie getting together, but more about that later. 

 I need to remember this for good, and next time I become a fan of something, I will avoid its fanbase. I do not mean to offend anyone, but a fanbase can really ruin a platform, especially when the platform is still developping and the fanbase is influencing it, which I believe did happen a lot with SGE. I will not deny that a fandom can improve such thing - that is definitely true as well - but sometimes the line between improving and ruining is slim, and if it doesn’t ruin the platform, then it might ruin a couple of fans’ experience of it. 

Now to the point of me hating Hophie.

As I mentioned in my previous post, and above. When I discovered the fandom and found out that people are shipping Hort and Sophie, I asked myself “But why? Sophie doesn’t like Hort.” and I kind of thought this was a joke or a meme ship. I always ship characters where both sides have at least a visible bit of attraction towards each other. Whether its friends to lovers or enemies to lovers. Hophie, until the last book and half, was not the case. It was a typical example of unrequited crush, Sophie once only used Hort to make Tedros jealous. But if my mind isn’t tricking me, she was always disgusted by him and even during their first encounter, he attempted to harass her! And the fact that “they were still kids back then” is not an excuse to me. 

Allow me to make a slight turn from SGE. When I was about 8-10, my mum took me to see an opera called Turandot. I will not bother you with opera, but long story short: A princess is very beautiful and a lot of men want to marry her. So she is giving everyone three questions, if they answer incorrectly, they are executed. Everyone are getting executed until a prince in disguise arrives and is in love with her, answers all questions correctly. Princess doesn’t want to marry him tho, so he asks her to guess his name and if she succeeds, he will gladly die. The princess doesn’t feel love at all and doesn’t want to fall in love. She believes she is a saint. Then in a dramatic duet the prince kisses her and ALL OF SUDDEN the princess falls in love with him. 

Whew. Sorry, I tried to make this as short as possible. I remember asking my mum after this: “Why is the girl always forced to love the boy?” Little me didn’t like this idea of a “magical kiss” already, lol. Mum’s answer was “Because it was written by a boy.”, but that’s not even my point here. Do you see the pattern? Girl keeps refusing guy but in the end he still gets her. THIS RIGHT HERE is the main reason why I hate Hophie. It reinforces the stereotype that if a guy is persistent enough, he will get the girl even if she said no a million times. 

Another note I’d like to say about this, and I’m going to receive hate for this opinion. I started book 1 when I was 16. Now I’m in my early twenties and I get that most SGE readers are still teenagers. The age of crushes, clumsy love experiments, etc. OK now I sound like a grandma. But I think this is where Hophie stems from. Everyone are seeing themselves in Hort. Your crush doesn’t like you back, his crush doesn’t like him back. Something like Éponine in Les Mis��rables. If Marius and Sophie both fall in love with the person who likes them, it’s like the crush of the fan does. Can we call this the Hort-Éponine complex? 

Aside from that, I believe that people who already experienced both sides of unrequited love (like yours truly grandma, right here), meaning Sophie’s side of it, are less likely to support such ships. 

I will now dive into the OTK “resolution” of this pairing. First let me just say, this book made me, if not hate, then at least strongly dislike Hort’s character. The first half of the book and even a some time after before he finally gets with Sophie, his character is disgusting to me. He is so obsessed with her, even while he’s still dating Nicola. As in my previous post, it’s like a huge part of his character is only “I LOVE SOPHIE”. While he’s still with Nicola, he never fails to mention “his FRIEND Sophie”. I will now paraphrase because I read a translation, not the original, but even when Hort’s singing to the guards to distract them so Agatha and Tedros can sneak into the Library, he sings something along the lines “Girlfriend Nikki and friend Soph”. I’m not sure if this was meant to convince the reader that Sophie ending up with Hort is a good idea, but with me, it did the exact opposite. 

In general, their “romance” feels extremely rushed to me. Compared to Sophie’s previous love interests, regardless of who they were as people, these two have zero chemistry. It seems as if Sophie decided to settle because there was no other guy for her. And the description of her suddenly being in love with him, as mentioned above, is another of those “magical kiss” stories. It is hardly believable and kind of... shallow. 

There even were several moments when Rafal was mentioned. In COT, when the protagonists wanted to flee Camelot but Sophie decided to stay, she saw Hort flying to her and she mistook him for Rafal. Goodness. Even in OTK there were a few moments when it seemed that Sophie still has issues from that relationship. Very few, but they were there. 

Therefore I refuse to believe that the reason for this was anything other than to satisfy the majority of the fandom. In addition, the entire book feels like one huge “fan service”, as other ships are “sailing” as well. We have Hestadil and Bogden/Willam, but these two are at least believable. Hestadil started, even tho inconspicously, two books ago, and it resolved naturally. And beforehand they were close friends, so there’s that. As for the boys, they were side characters, so we can only think that all resolved while they were off the scene. 

To sum it up, I thought of three different endings I’d prefer for Sophie. 

On the first place, this was mentioned several times by other people, is that she should have stayed on her own. That happened in TLEA, but this time, really. I hated that OTK made it seem that she really needs a partner. Yes, love, but heck... is romantic love the only thing that is out there? How about friendship? Content with oneself? Pursuing hobbies that you love? Freedom? Come on. Awesome characters that end up single AND ARE HAPPY should have more representation. And I think Sophie would have been amazing like that. 

On the second place I have two things. First, Sophie with a girl. Only I’m not sure who. Maybe Nicola, or Betty if she survived. Or maybe, people might hate me for this, but... Dot? I don’t ship it but I think it could have been cute. Maybe they would start off getting closer as friends and the rest would be left up to the reader’s imagination.

The other preferable ending I have at second place was originally on the third place, but some weird nostalgia overcame me when reading OTK and I had to move it up. People will hate me. But if Sophie should end up with a guy, it should have been Rhian. Yes, I know what you are thinking right now. But think about it. That guy really believed he was Arthur’s son. Imagine if he found out the truth. Something tells me it would be really hard for him at first, but in the end, if he found out that Japeth really only wants Aric, he could’ve joined the protagonists. In my opinion Sophie had the best dynamic with him, before it all spiralled downwards with snakes etc. Maybe he could pretend to help his twin but in the end... I believe I read something like this somewhere on Tumblr as well. Also this kind of feels as if it could have been Soman’s original plan before he turned to pleasing the fans. Or maybe I’m just fantasising too much.  Regardless of how much you’re cursing me right now, I believe Rhian deserved better and shouldn’t have died. After all, he was the better twin. 

As for Hort, well, before OTK I didn’t really care for his character, I didn’t dislike him but he wasn’t my favourite. I simply wished him well hoping he’ll get over Sophie so he can be happy, either with Nicola/someone else, or on his own. After the last book made me resent him, I’m not sure. He could have died, but I know that is cruel. 

He could have been slowly realising that he doesn’t need Sophie, his love would fade away, maybe Nicola could break up with him in the process, then they would get back together, at a natural pace, realisation, etc. Or they wouldn’t, or they wouldn’t break up at all, just separate on different missions, and then reunite and realise they were truly meant to be together all along. 

Whew, if you made it here, congratulations. If you read this as a Hophie shipper, I’m not taking away your opinion. I just needed to let this out. Hope we can respect each other. 

...But I still kinda wish we could get another version of OTK where Hophie doesn’t happen. 

[life-rewritten]

Spooky Season! A look into a Masterpiece (He’s Coming To Me Review)

I've been waiting to talk about this show and how my love for it will never end. Surprisingly the source of the show is GMMTV, whilst known for so many problematic elements in BL genre; He's coming to me manages to avoid every single issue naturally had with this genre. And because of that, this review is an ode to a masterpiece that should not be forgotten and should not be underrated. It's also Halloween, so this is another excuse to go back and look at the best things about this show. Hopefully, we get more like this GMMTV.

Ratings: Plot: 9/10 Directing: 9/10 Acting: 910 Satisfaction: 9/10 Overall: A* Rewatch factor: 8.5/10

AN IN-DEPTH REVIEW

Nothing wrong to say about this show. And that's a breath of fresh air; I remember first watching this show in 2019 very late because we had issues with the subtitles, and I went into it very sceptical and had low expectations. By the end of this show, I was so grateful and happy that this exists. 

The title of the show (He keeps coming to me) is what the heart of the show is about.  Thun, our main character who keeps going to Mes,  a ghost who he can see, his determination in keeping Mes by his side, to being his childhood acquaintance, to his best friend and finally to his lover, is felt and focused on when he has to brave the world and society norms, and some truths about himself.  Meanwhile, Mes has to discover his reason for being a ghost and unravel the mysteries tying him to his fate with Thun. So incredible to watch and see their love story unfold. 

Criticisms/ Comments

As I said, there are no negatives when it comes to this show.  All we could maybe mention is the slow pace from episode 1-3. But even at that, the relationship dynamics are shown genuinely because of the time it takes to develop the story.

This love story uses the trope friends to lovers which entails a soft cute and heartwarming bond between Mes and Thun since they first met each other. The two want to spend as much time with each other even though their worlds are different (spirit realm vs human realm). Thun is determined to have Mes keep coming to his side, learning about the lore and rules surrounding ghosts in our world; the use of incense, the way Mes starts of not being able to hold onto anything, the fact that Thun is the only person who sees Mes. He can't hide his feelings even when he's with his friends, he makes up excuses just to return home to spend time with Mes, and he makes it his mission to discover why Mes died, so Mes gets reincarnated. The slow pace might make people think the show is a bit boring, but it's just a way to introduce and show exposition to the other characters surrounding this world. If you rewatch the show, you also start to recognise foreshadowing symbolisms, devices and hints pointing to the final revelation about how Thun and Mes are tied together.

I also think some people struggled with as well the lack of 'skinship' from Thun and Mes, but this is a device used to emphasise one of the obstacles of our couple;  the lack of touch ( because Mes struggles to learn the rules of how to hold objects or touch Thun). We the audience try to uncover the reasons for why sometimes they're able to feel each other by mistake and Mes starts to work hard to hold objects and cook, and turn on the incense which keeps him tied to the environment it's in. I didn't have an issue with the skinship because the actors were phenomenal at showing little subtle hints to feelings on their faces of longing, want and love. The scenes where skinship was required wasn't stiff or awkward or weird like other shows of this genre make you feel about them. It felt natural,  a tad unrealistic (in terms of the way their heads tilted and the camera spun) but so what?  The show wasn't meant to focus on that; it focused on the bond and love between the two, they just enjoyed talking and spending quality time being domestic with each other, and that's adorable. Alright, let's look at the positives:

Character Breakdown and Plot Meaning

The characterisation of HCTM is so excellent; it still shocks me how much I didn't expect it to be this way. All our characters are critical to the plot, even when they're just side characters with no deep story arcs to themselves. Thun and Mes interact with people who are part of their path in recognising what they are to each other. Before I praise the characterisation of the two, let's focus on some other characters who were so good in this show:

Thun's best friends: Prince, Plufai and Khiem

These were a phenomenal group of friends who were so caring and patient and genuinely the heartwarming part of this series as well. I enjoyed watching how much they went out of their way to ensure that Thun was okay, even when they didn't understand why he was the way he was and also felt frightened by some of his actions (talking to himself randomly, and acting out). One of my fave story arcs during the season is when Khiem (Played amazingly by Sing) thinks Thun is taking drugs and so starts a secret series of investigations keeping an eye on his actions. It wasn't because they were judging him but because they were worried about his wellbeing.  

Also, my heart melted for Prince (Played by another excellent favourite Chimon),  who had unrequited feelings for Plufai and struggled to deal with her feelings for Thun and his own seemingly cold/nonchalant/evasive actions concerning her. It's the way he wasn't toxic or problematic and also was willing to step down if Thun did have feelings for Plufai. I also really enjoyed watching his relationship with her develop and the natural chemistry between the two.

Lastly, PluFai first starts as every female character from a GMMTV show, a competition, someone there to be a beard to the main character. Still, I enjoyed her heart. I also loved her being the mirror character to Thun's mum when it came to her relationship with Mes in the past. Both women show strength and understanding and acceptance once they discover the sexuality of the person who they had feelings for. And I thought her way of dealing with it, their friendship being robust and full of communication was really what sold it for me. There were moments when I was frightened about her connection to the mystery of Mes's death, and it broke my heart when she realised what she was to him and what it meant for her grandfather. I also enjoyed the way she takes it on her self to make it up to him and how forgiving she is to her grandfather despite the fact I didn't think he should be. She showed strength, understanding and warmth and kept being that way and also consistent.  And I love that because she wasn't problematic female stereotypes that GMMTV loves to add to women, she stayed great and true throughout the show. And I loved it.

Thun's Family: Mum and Dad

Honestly, the way the writing of these characters was what made me love this show the most. Thun's dad shows up only in episode 1 before he dies surprisingly and Mes sees his ghost disappear. I thought that's all we needed to know of him. Still, we really get to learn more about Thun's family dynamics; there are answers to why his mum didn't join them during the grave excursions, why she was absent during those years he meets Mes, his father's knowing and understanding gaze as Thun cries about not being able to see him and also how he's hidden the fact he sees ghosts. We get information as well about the relationship with him and the mum after Mes broke up with her.

Next, we have Thun's mum, her first appearance is warm and pleasant. Still, we won't be able to fathom that she's wearing the watch that Mes has been drawing all this time, she's the girl who provided Mes with the same gift he created for Thun, she's already been close with someone who came out and so she was a source of strength for Thun when he struggled with accepting his sexuality. That coming out scene is so incredible and has made this show a fantastic piece of media for representation for LGBT. I loved her relationship with Mes, despite it being an obstacle to our couple at first, she's so understanding of him, and she's so grateful he returned and is the person her son loves. But also it's the plot twist that Thun sees ghosts because she too can, and she was hiding that as a secret until she meets Mes. It made it better, a relief to know that he's not alone and there is a reason for why he's able to see them. It also made the relationship with our couple easier because she understood and saw Mes, so Thun and Mes's relationship was more readily accepted.

He's coming to me brought these characters and connected it to its world-building, rules and understanding of its supernatural themes whilst still providing consistent dynamics about friendship and family and life in general. Not only is it a BL show, but it had other focuses as well rounding it up and making it much more wholesome and needed. The characters held no toxic tropes commonly also found in BL, the relationships felt real and authentic, and each of the characters had development and growth that tied them together to the plot overall. Now onto the heart of this show: My all-time faves Thun and Mes

Thun

One of my favourite characters, honestly rewatching this show was so incredible, especially when I started to notice more about this character after all the revelations revealed throughout the show. I went into the show surprised at how open Thun was to Mes already, the way he cared and wanted what was the best for Mes who has always been alone and neglected. Even when older Thun shows up and still shows the same amount of care even though he dislikes the fact that he could see ghosts, he's so warm and protective over Mes, and it made me swoon and smile. I enjoyed watching him come to terms with who he was.

At first, we don't see any hints that this is something the story will focus on.  But as we go deeper into his university life and his reason for why he studied law etc. It becomes evident that Thun knows he's gay but is struggling with internalised homophobia, it's also pretty clear he's had feelings from the beginning for Mes. He even knew when Mes started having feelings for him too.

They just didn't want to confront what it meant. Ohm Pawat's acting is so incredible you can see the subtle changes in Thun, and meanings with his actions with Mes that they both have requited feelings for each other but they don't want to cross the line. Thun has memorable speeches during the show as well about his struggle with his sexuality and how people perceive him. It's incredible how the show mirrors his on the surface secret about seeing ghosts and being seen as abnormal to the world to his internal/ more profound secret about his sexuality and also feeling abnormal. It's so telling that once Mes enters his life, he no longer feels it a struggle to embrace who he is, he uncontrollably speaks to Mes and laughs and stares romantically whilst hanging around his friends, he can't help but run to him when he needs him. Especially during the rooftop scene, the fear of losing Mes causes him not to care what others think, and he proceeds to call for him and confess his feelings and stay out in the rain waiting for him. He also proceeds to accept his sexuality even more, once Mes enters his life, he kisses Plufai to determine what he truly feels and once that occurs he decides to head straight and try to talk to Mes about it, thereby afterwards always making Mes know what he is to him is more than friends. I can talk a lot about his character and how much I enjoyed his development and how he chose to finally trust the people around him and also his determination to keep Mes by his side.  Which we, later on, find out is also the reason for why they could touch and feel each other. The show emphasises that it's about his determination, his perseverance and love for Mes that keeps the latter coming to him. And towards the end, his wish comes true, and Mes returns to his side because of that. Awesome and beautifully written.  

Mes

Singto has been an unstoppable force in GMMTV as an actor, and Mes is another character that is just as memorable and great as the others. While Thun's characterisation surrounds his will and determination to keep Mes by his side, Mes's surrounds his warmth and caring aura. I love. love realising that both Mes and Thun mirrored each other when struggling with their sexuality, both had girls who were loyal and great to them, but they couldn't hide who they were anymore.

The show emphasises the importance of this,  telling the audience that yes they're gay, this is a show about two gay boys falling in love, and this is also about how they accept who they are whilst dealing with the obstacles that are supposed to separate them.

Mes is so soft, he's this adorable, mischievous (with personality), ball of fluff and I enjoyed his character. He wasn't written as a stagnant and a boring character; he had his own goals, his own self-exploration, his own storyline and mystery to be solved. And the way the show told his story, was fantastic, the way they mixed the supernatural elements of Mes and the mystery of his death back to Thun was so great. Mes and Thun were always destined to find each other; they were on the path to each other though one of it included him being murdered by his relative, every character is connected together to help get these two together at the end. I love how the show makes us feel like Mes has an unrequited love for Thun at first.

We see Singto's acting to the finest, the longing, the jealousy and the worry about their new blooming relationship. He also shows guilt and character depth when he realises that Kwan is Thun's mother. The pacing and directing keep us in the dark for why he's gone for so long and ran away after their first kiss. We later get the truth revealed as Thun comes out to his mum, and it's such a brilliant way to get the audience even more heartbroken about the reveal. Due to dramatic irony. The mum is the reason for why Thun can happily accept Mes as his lover in his life yet is also an obstacle because Mes can't get over what he did to her in the past. It's brilliant, and such a great way to write the story.

I am so happy as well that Mes returns to Thun's side. I cried like a baby watching their week together, knowing that the time to say goodbye was coming closer. Their conversation about everything and their uncontrollable feelings was so meaningful and heartbreaking; their confession about how they've loved each other from the start; how they've known how the latter felt but refused to accept it because of all the obstacles in their way. Mes still unsure but deciding to spend the last moments together as much as possible. And their relief in discovering that they can touch each other, and the reason for why. These two's love was so beautiful to see.

Lastly, I enjoyed the fact that this is a happy ending. With this genre when surrounding these topics death, separation etc. You expect sad endings mostly because that's the way directors like to end LGBT shows for a long time (something I absolutely detest), from episode 1, the show actually foreshadowed the ending, and comes through with it, I cried so much when I realised that it was not yet Mes's time to go all because of the reasons stated in episode 1. I also cried because GMMTV directors let a great representation show have a hopeful, romantic ending, and a show for many people to relate to, but also to run to and forget about reality.

 That's why this show is a masterpiece. I didn't even go into the devices and symbols used in this show, but there was a lot of meta, foreshadowing, dramatic irony etc. That also made this show brilliant. The directing and production quality is also fantastic and deserves praise. The actors; all of them were incredible. I just want another show like this please GMMTV?

[ardentaislinn]

Yuletide Letter 2020

Hi! I am also ardentaislinn on AO3. Thank you so much for volunteering to write one of my chosen fandoms! I really can’t wait to see what you come up with. Most importantly, I hope you have fun writing whichever of my fandoms it is. Any suggestions I make here are optional.

Here you’ll find:

My general likes

My DNWs

And prompts for the following fandoms:

Peninsula: Train to Busan 2 (2020) - Jung Seok, Min Jung, Joon Yi, Yoo Jin

Stranger | 비밀의 숲 - Hwang Si Mok, Han Yeo Jin

Kingdom | 킹덤 - Prince Lee Chang, Seo Bi

Illang: The Wolf Brigade | 인랑 (2018) - Im Joong Kyung, Lee Yoon Hee | Kim Seo Hee

A quick note on the Korean names - I’m fine with however you choose to transliterate them. Hyphen/no hyphen, Shi Mok/Si Mok, etc. Just do what you are comfortable with and I’ll adjust no problem. No need to add the honourifics, though

My likes:

I love getting together fics most of all. I love almost every kind of trope (fake dating, slow burn, rivals-to-lovers, “unrequited” pining (that is really requited), found families, etc.) Also, casefic, epistolary fic, consent, forbidden pleasures, beta heroes, bed sharing, masquerades, military kink, physical imperfections, ladies being badass and female relationships (whether romantic or friendship), relationships that build tension before exploding, equal relationships, trapped together, competence, communication, U/RST, positive endings.

You may notice from the below that my ships mostly involve sweet and occasionally broken men being head over heels for awesome ladies, (and usually not feeling worthy). So that dynamic is strongly encouraged.

I also like smut, but it certainly isn’t a necessity. For smut, I’m (sadly) fairly vanilla. But I like light bondage, cunnilingus, shower sex, and accidental/consensual voyeurism, (Particularly guys taking matters into their own hands when they think they can’t be with their lady, and the woman stumbling across him mid-act. Possibly my favourite kink ever? Writer’s choice whether the woman joins in or gets embarrassed)

Happy endings (or at least hopeful endings) are preferred. Like, super, super preferred. I don’t mind angst at all, but it kinda has to be on the way out of the darkness by the end.

Dislikes/DNWs:

Miserable endings. Major character death. Baby/Pregnancy fic. Humiliation. Drug use/drug mentions/addiction. Self harm/abuse. Non-con/rape. Heavy kink. A/B/O. M-Preg. Incest. Bestiality, animal harm etc. Underage sexual content. 1st person POV (unless for epistolary). Not big on high school AUs or Rock band AUs. Unbalanced power dynamics in ships without acknowledging/exploring that. (This effects one particular ship below, which I’ll discuss in more detail in the fandom section).

I think that’s it?

And so, to the fandoms, in no particular order:

Peninsula: Train to Busan 2

Jung Seok, Min Jung, Joon Yi, Yoo Jin

While maybe objectively not as good a film as the first one, I still enjoyed the hell out of it. Given that it was essentially a cross between Escape From New York and Mad Max, what isn’t to love? I loved the expansion of the world and the clever uses of zombies in the chase scenes. And I loved that the message was that being logical and self-sacrificing isn’t always the right choice - sometimes you should be driven by heart and empathy. And I really liked the idea that anything can mean happiness when you love and are loved in return - particularly in regards to Joon Yi, but also Jung Seok (and his found family?).

What would interest me the most in this fandom is post-movie fics. But if you wanna do a canon divergent/au thing, I’d be cool with that, too. Some prompts:

Joon Yi struggles a lot more than her sister to readjust to a “normal” life

In order to stay together after being rescued, Jung Seok and Min Jung have to pretend to be married

After four long years of loneliness, Min Jung just wants to be touched

Jung Seok isn’t surprised to find himself in love with Min Jung - and wanting to be a father to her girls - but is he good enough for them? He’s left them behind once - can he forgive himself? Can Min Jung?

The zombie plague escapes from Korea - and Jung Seok, Min Jung, and her girls are the closest thing to experts on how to fight back and contain it that the authorities have. Will their nightmare never be over? Or is this a chance to end it once and for all?

With Min Jung in hospital while her leg heals, Jung Seok suddenly finds himself a surrogate father to two very unruly girls.

Stranger | 비밀의 숲

Han Yeo Jin, Hwang Si Mok

This show is just so good, and Si Mok and Yeo Jin - and their relationship - is a big part of that. He’s logical and doesn’t feel things the way most other people do, but that doesn’t mean he’s given a free pass to be an asshole. He’s a good man who always does what’s right. And Yeo Jin is just as smart as he is, and equally committed to doing what’s right, but in a different way. They make a perfect team.

I love how much they absolutely, completely, trust and respect each other. Si Mok cares about her as much as he is capable - probably more so than he cares about anyone else. There isn’t any drama or jealousy or anything like that in their relationship. They are both practical adults. But it doesn’t mean they don’t have a deep bond. I do ship these two - and would love getting together fic if you can!

Prompts:

Yeo Jin will probably have a tough time of it from now on. How will Si Mok support her through it?

How will Yeo Jin and Si Mok keep in touch now that he’s moved away again? Late night phone calls that slowly become more intimate? Texts or emails (epistolary style)?

In the last episode, there was a hint that Si Mok had a prophetic dream. What if he really did develop a power? And Yeo Jin was the only one he trusted with the truth?

What if Yeo Jin and Si Mok had to travel somewhere for an investigation - and there’s only one bed…

Si Mok isn’t incapable of noticing when a woman is attracted to him. But what if that woman is Yeo Jin? Do they try to make a friends-with-benefits arrangement work? Or do they like each other two much for that?

Everyone already knows Yeo Jin and Si Mok are close - but why do their friends suddenly think they are dating? What’s changed? And how do they stop the rumours - without disappointing all the friends who were hoping they’d finally become a couple?

Yeo Jin had drunk one too many shots of soju and thought she might never see Si Mok again - so she’d jumped his bones and snuck out before he woke, full of regrets. But what happens now they have to work a case together again?

Feel free to bring in the other characters, too, as long as Yeo Jin and Si Mok remain the focus! I love the various dynamics they have with the people around them.

Kingdom | 킹덤

Prince Lee Chang, Seo Bi

Like with Si Mok and Yeo Jin above, so much of what I like about these two is that they are great characters separately - but work so well together as a team. They trust each other. He has great faith in her abilities and respects her so much. And she is loyal to him and respects him in return because she knows he’s a good man and a good leader.

I also love how the show uses both politics and horror elements, both to best advantage. It’s so well-written and compelling.

Now, I can see how this ship skirts close to my “no unbalanced power differentials in relationships” DNW, since he’s a prince, and she’s very much not royalty, so I thought I would clarify my position on this. I would most like fic set after he gives up his place in the royal family, since I think that mitigates basically all the issues. Even though I don’t think he would have intentionally abused his power over her, and Seo Bi was never particularly deferential to him, it still would have effected the relationship. Now that they are on more equal footing, there may be some lingering, residual issues surrounding this, but I feel like it’s at the level of bringing some interesting angst into the equation without feeling icky, if that makes sense.

Prompts:

Lee Chang and Seo Bi are somehow transported into modern day Korea. How will they adapt?

Both Lee Chang and Seo Bi have seen horrifying things - and they have the nightmares to prove it. How do they help each other through?

I feel like there are a million stories you could tell within the time jump at the end of the second season. Seo Bi and Lee Chang are travelling together, but no doubt keeping their mission to find the resurrection plant a secret. Are they pretending to be married? Is there anything Lee Chang has to adjust to now that he’s no longer, technically, the crown prince? How are they making money? Is Seo Bi hiring out her medicinal knowledge, while Lee Chang sells his sword? How far will they go to find the answers they seek?

The properties of the resurrection plant are still largely unknown. What horrors will they have to face next, now that another outbreak is looming? 

Lee Chang decides that Seo Bi needs formal fight training - and takes it upon himself to teach her.

What moments of levity can they find together amongst the horrors?

Lee Chang knows he shouldn’t think of Seo Bi in that way - they are colleagues, and despite everything he is still from a royal family. He needs her too much to risk everything because of his desire. But oh, how he wants her…

Illang: The Wolf Brigade | 인랑 (2018)

Im Joong Kyung, Lee Yoon Hee | Kim Seo Hee

So much about this movie is absolutely my jam. The action scenes, the exploration of what desperation can drive people to, the unclear loyalties that are slowly revealed. That whole sequence when they first meet and spend time together is like a distillation of so many of my favourite things. He sees her and is just instantly gone on her. And she for him. And from then on it’s just a quiet, intense longing between them. They are so aware of each other, every sense drawn towards the other. But he’s so broken, and he sees himself as more animal than man. And it’s revealed that she has equally deep wounds, too.

An argument can be made that at least some of it was an act, of course. They were both trying to deceive each other after all. But I think it’s pretty obvious that there were real feelings there, particularly because she tries to warn him that he’s walking into a trap, and he comes back to save her. Maybe even they don’t know how deep their feelings go, or the other’s feelings, but the audience knows.

And yet...I’ve seen it twice now, and the ending is still no clearer to me. Like, is he dead? It doesn’t seem like it, since both she and her brother saw him at the train station. But maybe he’s like a guardian angel now? And if he’s not dead, where did the shot come from? A hidden gun? The sniper? And most importantly of all, if he’s not dead...why aren’t they together??? Like, aren’t all the potential impediments to their relationship gone by that point?

So, I guess most of all I would like fic that makes more sense than that ending - preferably by giving them the happy ending they deserve.

Prompts:

Joong Kyung watches over Yoon Hee from the shadows - but she always knows he’s there. How can she convince him to come into the light, and back into her life?

Yoon Hee’s brother gets himself into trouble, and the only person she can turn to for help is a man she hasn’t seen in too long - Joong Kyung.

Joong Kyung now walks the line between the living and the dead, but he can’t stay away from Yoon Hee. (Paranormal/magic AU?)

Has there been too many lies between them to make a relationship work? Neither think they are worthy of the other, but when they are pulled back together (to give evidence for an official inquiry?) they can’t quite keep their distance.

Joong Kyung is on the run, and he doesn’t know who to trust - except the one woman he’s never forgotten.

Misunderstandings and lies abound between them - but what happens when they are trapped together and must wait for rescue?

If you don’t want to do a post-canon fic, how about canon divergence? What would have happened if the phone hadn’t rung in that warehouse at that moment? Might Yoon Hee have told herself that she could use her body to prove her loyalty to him? And might Joong Kyung have told himself that it couldn’t hurt to succumb - that it didn’t mean anything?

I think that’s everything. Thank you so much!

[isabvllas]

         ♡ . *  (   jennie  kim,  cis  female,  she  /  her   )   have  you  heard   ?   it  seems  like  the  heir  of  the  MUN  dynasty  was  very  close  to  liam  yu  too.  they  go  by  ISABELLA  and  they  were  liam’s  FAMILY  FRIEND.  their  networth  is  of  82M  and  they’re  only  TWENTY-THREE  …  what  a  burden  it  must  be.  i  heard  they  can  be  very  COQUETTISH  and  VIVACIOUS.  but  these  last  few  months,  their  DISINGENUOUS  and  VAIN  personality  has  been  showing  more.  the  media  is  sure  having  a  field  day  with  them   !   i  hope  this  road  trip  with  friends  will  help  them.  did  you  know  that  CHEWING  BUBBLEGUM  AFTER  LUNCH,  WHISPERING  SECRETS  TO  A  LOVER,  CANDY  HEARTS  and  PILLOWS  STAINED  WITH  TEARS  really  show  their  true  persona   ?    maybe  liam  was  the  only  one  who  knew  that  ...   

         hi  everyone,  i’m  so  happy  to  be  here   !!!   my  name  is  diana,  i’m  twenty,  go  by  she  /  her  pronouns,  and  reside  in  the  est  timezone.  some  quick  facts  abt  me:  i’m  a  libra  and  girl  group  stan   !!   below  u  can  read  a  bit  abt  my  muse  isabella  hehe  if  u  like  this  post  i’ll  hit  u  up  for  plots   !!!   my  discord  is   missing blackpink hours#5522  if  u  wanna  message  me  there,  but  if  not,  im’s  work  just  fine  <3

♡ . *    𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒔𝒕𝒊𝒄𝒔    !

full  name :  isabella  grace  mun

nickname(s)  :  bella,  isa  (  by  liam  only  )

age  :  twenty-three

zodiac  :  libra  sun,  scorpio  moon   (  click  )

sexuality  :  bisexual

alignment  :  chaotic  neutral

pinterest  :  click

♡ . *    𝒃𝒂𝒄𝒌𝒈𝒓𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒅    !   (   drug  tw   )

keeping  up  appearances  has  always  been  the  mun  family’s  main  focus.  everything  they  do  is  an  attempt  to  better  their  public  image.  her  parents  marriage  was  merely  another  business  agreement  between  two  powerful  families

her  father’s  side  works  in  finance  and  investments,  while  her  mother’s  side  owns  one  of  the  wealthiest  PR  firms  in  the  world

her  parents  got  married  because  there  was  nothing  the  public  loved  more  than  family.  you  could  get  away  with  almost  anything  with  the  illusion  strong  family  values  under  your  belt.  isabella’s  conception  was  just  part  of  the  arrangement

her  mother  was  not  particularly  maternal.  her  husband  was  a  few  years  to  her  senior,  so  she  was  still  fairly  young  when  she  got  pregnant.  however,  they  had  already  been  married  for  two  years  and  a  baby  was  part  of  the  deal

isabella  was  passed  along  through  a  string  of  nannies.  none  of  them  stuck  around  long  enough  to  give  her  the  emotional  support  she  so  desperately  desired.  she  clung  to  adult  figures  throughout  the  majority  of  her  childhood,  from  boarding  school  teachers  to  private  tutors

as  she  grew  older,  however,  she  began  to  understand  the  way  of  things.  she  barely  spent  any  time  with  her  parents,  but  the  one  thing  she  learned  from  her  father  was  how  to  look  out  for  herself.  no  one  else  was  going  to  do  it  for  her

throughout  secondary  school,  she  perfected  the  art  of  getting  what  she  wants.  she’d  put  on  a  sweet,  helpless  act  to  manipulate  those  around  her.  she  became  fluent  in  lying,  and  it  always  worked  to  her  advantage  that  she  had  a  face  people  could  trust

she  spent  her  teen  years  growing  a  social  media  following,  becoming  a  beauty  influencer.  she  was  seen  as  an  it  girl,  credited  for  starting  various  fashion  trends

without  anyone  looking  after  her,  isabella  was  able  to  do  whatever  she  wanted.  however,  she  also  learned  from  her  parents  the  importance  of  maintaining  a  pristine  image.  so,  she  partied  and  had  her  fun  out  of  the  public  eye,  or  so  she  thought

at  seventeen,  isabella  had  her  first  coke  scandal  after  pictures  of  her  were  leaked  to  the  tabloids.  it  was  like  a  rich  kids  right  of  passage.  her  parents  were  furious  with  her.  for  a  moment,  isabella  felt  hopeful.  they  were  furious  because  they  cared,  right  ?  unfortunately  for  her,  it  wasn’t  because  of  what  she  was  doing.  they  were  only  angry  she  was  stupid  enough  to  get  caught

isabella’s  mother  took  care  of  cleaning  up  her  image.  after  all,  damage  control  is  what  she  knew  how  to  do  best.  isabella  was  forced  to  take  a  break  from  social  media.  according  to  the  statement  her  family  put  out,  she  was  under  a  lot  of  stress  from  running  a  social  media  empire  at  such  a  young  age.  as  per  her  mother’s  instructions,  her  social  media  blackout  lasted  a  year.  by  the  time  she  was  back  in  the  public  eye,  she  had  graduated  high  school  and  was  started  the  next  chapter  of  her  life

however,  the  year  she  took  away  from  social  media  was  the  most  time  she  had  ever  spent  with  her  parents.  she  was  forced  to  stay  with  them  so  they  could  keep  her  from  further  tarnishing  the  perfect  image  they  had  created  for  themselves.  during  this  time,  she  found  out  she  hated  her  parents.  they  were  cold,  and  completely  emotionless

she  felt  alone  most  of  the  time.  her  friends  were  almost  always  fake,  and  so  was  she.  she  was  always  putting  on  a  mask  too,  so  it’d  be  unfair  to  even  judge.  but  the  only  person  she  could  ever  trust  was  herself.  except  liam  was  different

she  knew  liam  her  whole  life  through  familial  connections,  but  she  only  got  closer  to  him  over  recent  years.  he  seemed  to  be  the  only  person  who  could  understand  her.  she  started  to  confide  in  him  with  a  lot  of  things.  he  made  her  feel  less  alone,  a  true  friend.  it  was  unlike  anything  she  had  ever  experienced  before  and  she  wasn’t  used  to  anyone  genuinely  caring.  he  would  let  her  sleepover  whenever  she  was  going  through  something

his  loss  hit  her  hard.  even  though  she  tries  to  appear  like  she’s  grieving  his  loss  healthily,  she  isn’t.  isabella  has  convinced  herself  she’s  cursed,  like  his  loss  was  her  fault  just  because  he  was  associated  to  her.  like  everything  she  touches  falls  apart.  she  kinda  started  using  drugs  again  more  heavily  because  of  everything,  where  before  she  mainly  only  used  in  social  settings

♡ . *    𝒑𝒆𝒓𝒔𝒐𝒏𝒂𝒍𝒊𝒕𝒚    !

isabella  appears  to  be  an  extrovert  on  the  surface.  even  though  most  of  it  is  an  act,  she  has  a  lively  presence.  she  likes  to  be  the  life  of  the  party  and  the  center  of  attention,  but  when  it  comes  down  to  it,  it’s  just  part  of  the  persona  she  puts  on  for  others

she’s  playfully  flirty  with  almost  everyone.  it  started  as  a  way  to  manipulate  people,  but  she  also  finds  amusement  in  it  now.  to  her,  everything  life  is  a  game  and  she  wants  to  win

she  is  always  trying  to  manipulate  people  for  her  own  selfish  gain,  however,  she’s  extremely  careful  to  be  lowkey  about  it  so  no  one  really  knows.  she  appears  to  be  very  sincere  and  considerate  of  others.  most  people  view  her  as  harmless,  which  is  exactly  what  she  wants.  she  wants  people  to  underestimate  her

isabella  can  be  quite  full  of  herself.  she  obsesses  over  her  appearance  like  24/7  partially  due  to  her  social  media  presence.  she  won’t  leave  the  house  without  looking presentable  because  she  refuses  to  be  spotted  looking  bad

but  aside  from  obsessing  over  her  looks,  she  also  has  a  superiority  complex.  she  thinks  she’s  better  and  smarter  than  most  people,  but  she  doesn’t  show  this  side  of  herself  too  often

she  loves  to  go  out  and  be  in  the  presence  of  strangers.  she  feels  closer  to  them  than  to  the  people  she  actually  knows.  but  it’s  one  of  the  reasons  she  loves  parties  so  much.  asksjhkjsh  like  that  part  in  great  gatsby  where  that  girl  was  like  large  parties  are  much  more  intimate  !!!  that’s  bella 

her  life  is  ultimately  unfulfilling  tho,  because  the  way  she  masquerades  around  pretending  to  be  one  way  just  to  use  people  for  her  own  benefit  has  left  her  completely  alone.  she  seeks  real  friendships  and  relationships  deep  down,  but  she  does  everything  in  her  power  to  bury  this  side  of  herself.  she  also  seeks  validation  but  doesnt  care  enough  about  anyone’s  opinions  to  ever  receive  it

♡ . *    𝒘𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒆𝒅  𝒄𝒐𝒏𝒏𝒆𝒄𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏𝒔    !

partner  in  crime  -  someone  who  she  can  scheme  with,  someone  who  will  play  these  little  games  with  her,  someone  she  has  fun  with

ex-lover  -  there  could  b  more  than  one  of  these   !!!    they  could  have  ended  on  bad  terms  or  good  terms,  still  have  lingering  feels  or  tension  maybe  they’re  friends  or  maybe  they  just  try  to  stay  away  from  each  other 

unrequited  crush  -  ur  muse  could  have  a  crush  on  her  and  maybe  she’s  oblivious  or  maybe  she  uses  it  to  her  advantage.  OR  we’d  have  to  plot  this  out  well  but  maybe  she  has  genuine  feelings  for  your  muse  and  doesn’t  know  what  to  do  about  it  because  this  never  really  happens

requited  feelings  -  speaks  for  itself,  but  our  muses  have  feelings  for  each  other.  ik  isabella  would  make  things  complicated  just  because  it  would  be  hard  for  her  to  accept  that  she  actually  cares  about  someone  that  isn’t  herself

will they,  won’t  they  -  there’s  tension  between  them,  but  nothing  has  ever  come  out  of  it  yet.  maybe  something  has  almost  happened,  maybe  they’ve  kissed  once,  but  either  way  the  tension  lingers  in  the  air  whenever  they’re  together

flirtationship  -  they  flirt  with  each  other  constantly,  but  nothing  has  ever  come  from  their  flirting.  maybe  they  have  good  chemistry,  but  haven't  done  anything  about  it  and  maybe  they  don’t  want  to.  maybe  they  don’t  want  to  ruin  a  good  thing 

current fling/friends  w  benefits -  someone  she  is  currently  seeing.  it’s  most  likely  no  strings  attached,  but  maybe  it’s  someone  she  genuinely  cares  about  as  a friend

enemies  w  benefits  -  imagine  the  tension   !!!   they  started  out  hating  each  other  but  ended  up  hooking  up.  maybe  it  was  a  one  time  thing,  or  maybe  they  can’t  stop  going  back  to  each  other.  maybe  they  keep  it  a  secret  and  don’t  want  anyone  else  to  know.  this  could  develop  in  soooo  many  ways  pls  this  is  so  sexy  !!!!

party  buddies  -  they  always  go  to  parties  together.  maybe  they  don’t  see  each  other  outside  of  parties,  maybe  they  met  at  a  party  and  started  hanging  out  more  afterwards

drug  /  alcohol  buddies  -  someone  she  gets  fucked  up  with.  maybe  they’re  not  that  close  when  they’re  sober,  but  are  way  closer  when  under  the  influence

ex-friends  -  someone  she  used  to  consider  a  close  friend,  but  they  had  a  falling  out  for  whatever  reason  n  maybe  they  strongly  dislike  each  other  now,  which  means  isabella  is  probably  trying  to  plot  their  down  fall

sibling-like friendship  -  someone  she  sees  like  a  sibling.  since  she’s  an  only  child,  i’d  love  a  friendship  that  feels  like  family

unlikely  friends  -  a  pair  you  wouldn't  imagine  would  be  friends,  but  for  whatever  reason,  they  get  along  well

cousins  -  they  could  get  along  well,  or  maybe  there’s  family  drama  that  makes  them  hate  each  other

take  care  -  someone  who  looks  after  her  when  she  drinks  to  much   !!!   someone  who  keeps  her  out  of  trouble  when  she’s  under  the  influence.  she  would  probably  feel  extremely  weird  like  when  she’s  sober  bc  someone  taking  care  of  her  ???  feels  fake  2  her

confidant  -  someone  who  confides  in  her  or  someone  she  confides  in,  or  they  confide  in  each  other.  they  don’t  necessarily  have  to  be  the  closest  friends  ever,  but  they  get  along  and  maybe  they  talk  more  in  private

rivals  -  they  don’t  like  each  other  for  whatever  reason,  which  we  can  plot. maybe  it’s  jealousy  or  their  personalities  just  clash,  but  for  whatever  reason  they  do  not  get  along

frenemies  -  they’re  great  friends  to  each  other’s  faces,  but  when  they’re  not  around  each  other,  they  act  questionably

bad  influence  -  someone  she  is  a  bad  influence  on.  maybe  she’s  manipulating  them,  or  just  encourages  them  to  do  bad  things  and  they  listen  to  her  for  whatever  reason

that’s  everything  !!!  i’m  soooo  sorry  this  got  a  lil  lengthy,  it  wasn’t  my  intention  but  also  idk  how  2  shut  up  AJKDSHDJH  anyway  i’m  so  excited  to  plot  with  u  all  and  start  interacting,  so  hit  me  up  on  discord  or  im’s  or  i’ll  come  to  u  <3

[luellasu]

          ✧.°   hello  hello  !!!   i’m  diana  (  she/her,  20,  est  )  aka  ur  resident  girl  group  stan  !!   so  i’m  a  little  late  to  the  party  but  i’m  finally  here,  introducing  my  baby  angel  luella  (  she  is  quite  literally  an  angel  hehe  ).  u  can  read  all  abt  her  under  the  cut,  but  if  u  want  2  plot,  we  can  do  so  thru  im’s  or  on  discord  depending  on  what  u  prefer  !!  my  discord  is  everybody say STAN LOONA#5522

𝙵𝙸𝙻𝙴    :    #ANG3L    //    STATS    »    luella ‘lu’  su,  (  appears to be )  twenty,  cis female,  she/her,  ballerina.    ATTRIBUTES    »    devoted,  mercurial,  captivating,  demure.    SEEN    »    strangers whispering in the night,  the lingering scent of vanilla in the air,  tired eyes stained by glitter and mascara.    DO NOT MISTAKE FOR    »    tzuyu chou.

(     𝑯𝑼𝑴𝑨𝑵.   )

so,,  since  she  cant  remember  her  life  as  a  human,  i’ll  keep  it  short   !!!   but  i  figured  it’s  worth  mentioning

as  a  human,  she  had  big  aspirations.  she  was  raised  predominantly  by  her  grandmother  because  her  parents  were  always  working

luella had  always  wanted  to  be  a  dancer,  but  she  came  from  a  lower  middle  class  family  and  they  couldn’t  afford  to  put  her  in  lessons.  so,  sometimes  she  would  watch  classes  through  the  window

she  studied  hard  in  school  and  was  at  the  top  of  her  class,  and  despite  never  formally  receiving  lessons,  all  her  years  of  observing  classes  made  her a  promising  dancer

lu took  a  year  off  after  high  school  to  work  and  save  money,  and  planned  to  audition  for  a  prestigious  ballet  academy  in  europe  because  there  were  recruiters  in  her  town

however,  on  the  way  to  the  audition,  she  died  in  a  car  accident  along  with  her  parents.  a  few  months  prior  to  this,  her  grandmother  had  died  of  old  age

so,  with  the  deaths  of  her  and  her  family,  it  didn’t  take  long  for  her  to  be  forgotten  all  together

(     𝑨𝑵𝑮𝑬𝑳 .   )

as  an  angel,  luella  avoided  living  with  humans  at  first.  she  did  not  want  to  get  too  attached,  and  she  felt  that  living  among  them  wouldn’t  end  well  for  her

however,  even  from  a  distance,  she  became  attached  to  one  human.  it  was  a  girl,  a  ballet  dancer.  it  was  then  she  made  the  decision  to  live  among  humans,  and  she  decided  to  take  up  ballet  to  be  closer  to  her

still,  even  living  among  humans,  she  managed  to  keep  some  distance.  she  was  more  reserved,  and  extremely  observant.  eventually  though,  the  two  became  friends.  she  felt  more  protective  over  this  one human  above  all  others

this  continued  for  a  while,  but  the  guilt  of  having  a  favorite  began  to  linger  in  her  thoughts.  she  made  the  decision  to  leave and  continue  watching  her  from  afar  instead

once  lu left  the  human  world,  she  started  to  feel  a  lot  better  about  herself  and  could  say  she  no  longer  had  favorites.  for  a  few  years,  this  worked perfectly.  except  the  ballet  dancer  she  had  once  been  so  close  to  developed  an  illness  and  passed  away  from  it

lu  was  riddled  with  regret.  she  wished  she  had  stayed  close  to  her  for  the  remainder  of  her  life  instead  of  running  away.  the  worst  part  was,  she  knew  that  human  felt  abandoned  by  her

it  was  the  first  time  as  an  angel  that  she  felt  like  a  failure

for  a  while  after  the  death  of  the  dancer,  luella  couldn’t  focus  properly.  she  began  spacing  out  a  lot,  making  mistakes  more  frequently  (  when  prior  to  this,  she  was  the  perfect  example  of  what  an  angel  should  be  ).  she  could  not  move  on  and  started  to  feel  like  she  was  not  fit  to  be  an  angel

as  this  was  negatively  impacting  her  ability  to  carry  out  her  responsibilities,  she  pressured  by  the  other  angels  to  either  overcome  her  failures  or  lose  her  status  as  an  angel

this  ultimatum  made  her  realize  she  wanted  to  remain  an  angel  and  that  she  would  have  to  get  her  act  together  to  do  so. for  a  brief  moment,  she  contemplated  giving  up  her  status,  to  be  able  to  forget  it  all.  but  when  it  came  down  to  it,  she  didn’t  want  to  lose  the  memories  of  all  those  she  had  crossed  paths  with,  especially  the  dancer,  who  at  least  was  alive  in  her  thoughts

it  was  not  easy  to  return  to  being  the  perfect  angel,  but  she  worked  hard  to  get  back  to  that  level  

eventually,  she  felt  ready  to  live  among  humans  once  more.  she  decided  to  move  to  lunehaven  for  a  while,  though  she  really  wants  to  move  to  paris  one  day.  in  the  meantime,  she  has  continued  pursuing  ballet  and  works  as  an  instructor  for  kids

she  attempts  to  live  a  quiet  life,  not  getting  too  close  to  anyone,  but  it  does  get  lonely  sometimes

(    𝑷𝑬𝑹𝑺𝑶𝑵𝑨𝑳𝑰𝑻𝒀.   )

luella  tends  to  be  quite  reserved.  she  rarely  initiates  conversations  or  hangouts,  but  is  relieved  when  someone  else  does.  she  enjoys  being  social,  she’s  just skeptical  about  getting  too  close  to  others

she  is  a  scorpio  sun  with  a  libra  moon  so  take  that  as  u  will   !!

she  is  extremely  devoted  to  dance  and  being  an  angel  (  despite  everything  that  happened  ),  and  also  very  devoted  to  the  few  that  she  is  close  to,  however,  she  changes  her  mind  a  lot  about  other  things.  her  mood  tends  to  change  a  lot,  but  she  does  her  best  to  keep  this  to  herself

as  you  can  expect  of  scorpio  and  libra  placements,  she  can  be  quite  an  intense/obsessive  lover  BUT  can  also  be  flighty  if  something  seems  too  serious  or  causes  her  to  feel  too  much.  yes,  she  is  a  walking  paradox  i  do  not  want  2  live  in  her  head  !!!

she  adores  classical  music,  which  can  be  expected  of  a  ballet  dancer.  she  wants  to  learn  how  to  play  violin  one  day

her  taste  is  pretty  ....  refined,  so  she  can  be  quite  the  snob  sometimes 

she  enjoys  going  to  the  theatre  and  the  opera  and  stuff  like  that,  and  mostly  goes  alone

she  comes  alive  at  nighttime  tbh,,  the  quiet  hours  once  everyone  has  gone  to  sleep  is  her  favorite  time  of  day.  she  lovessss  stargazing  and  if  you  become  her  friend,  she  will  force  you  to  have  picnics  under  the  stars

she’s  bi  bi  bi  babey  !!!

take  a  look  at  her  pinterest  board  to  get  a  feel  for  her  aesthetic   !!!!

(    𝑾𝑨𝑵𝑻𝑬𝑫 𝑪𝑶𝑵𝑵𝑬𝑪𝑻𝑰𝑶𝑵𝑺.   )

cultured  duo  -  someone  who  goes  to  the  theatre/cinema/opera  with  her  !!!   it could  be  against  their  will,  maybe  she  begs  them  to  come.  or  maybe  they  also  enjoy the  these  things 

ex-fling/gf/bf  -  there  could  b  more  than  one  of  these  !!   they  could  have  ended  on  bad  terms  or  good  terms,  still  have  lingering  feels  or  tension  or  maybe  they  remained  friends  !!!  we  can  plot  this  literally  however   !!

unrequited  crush  -  maybe  she  has  a  crush  on  ur  muse  and  it  scares  her  to  admit.  OR  ur  muse  could  have  a  crush  on  her  and  maybe  she’s  oblivious  to  it

current fling/friends  w  benefits  -  someone  she  is  currently  seeing.  could  be  no  strings  attached,  or  there  could  b  some  feelings  there.  maybe  they  don’t  want  to  make  it  anything  serious,  or  maybe  they’re  ready  to  take  it  to  the  next  level.  maybe  one  person  is  ready  to  go  further,  and  the  other  isn’t.

enemies  w  benefits  -  imagine  the  tension   !!!   they  started  out  hating  each  other  but  ended  up  hooking  up.  maybe  it  was  a  one  time  thing,  or  maybe  they  can’t  stop  going  back  to  each  other.  maybe  they  keep  it  a  secret  and  don’t  want  anyone  else  to  know.  this  could  develop  in  soooo  many  ways 

ex-friends  -  someone  she  used  to  consider  a  best/close  friend,  but  they  had  a  falling  out  for  whatever  reason  n  maybe  they  strongly  dislike  each  other  now.  maybe  they  want  to  re-kindle  their  friendship  but  don’t  know  how

sibling-like friendship  -  someone  she  sees  like  a  sibling.  they’re  there  for  each  other  and  look  out  for  one  another,  always  have  each  other’s  backs 

dynamic  duo  -  ride  or  dies.  platonic  soulmates   !!   this  person  is  prob  one  of  the  closest  people  to  her  and  knows  her  very  well   !    they  could  b  a  power  duo,  always  looking  out  for  each  other

take  care  -  i  think  it  would  be  cool  if  maybe  one  day  she  drank  a  little  too  much  or  was  having  an  off  day  in  general  and  your  muse  helped  her  get  home  and  spent  the  night  to  make  sure  she  was  okay.  lu  probably  feels  like  she  owes  them  a  favor  and  is  really  grateful  in  general  that  they  took  the  time  to  care

confidant  -  someone  who  confides  in  her  or  someone  she  confides  in,  or  they  confide  in  each  other.  they  don’t  necessarily  have  to  be  the  closest  friends  ever,  but  they  get  along,  trust  each  other,  and  maybe  they  talk  more  in  private

rivals  -  they  don’t  like  each  other  for  whatever  reason,  which  we  can  plot. maybe  it’s  jealousy  or  their  personalities  just  clash,  but  for  whatever  reason  they  do  not  get  along.  maybe  they  bring  out  a  bad  side  to  her  that  most  people  dont  see

good  influence  -  someone  she  can  be  a  good  influence  on,  someone  she  brings  out  the  best  in,  maybe  someone  she  rly  cares  about  and  wants  to  look  after  to  make  sure  they’re  ok   !!

this  is  all  i  have  for  now,  but  maybe  eventually  i  will  make  a  plots  page   !!!

[medea10]

My Review of Given

*this exists* Huh? Fuck Isekai shit! GIMME SOME BL LIKE YESTERDAY! Yes, I know what I said before but…it’s an anime with boys and music! Could this be the next Gravitation that many of us have waited for?

Ritsuka Uenoyama on the outside has always seemed listless when it comes to many things and can’t be bothered with most people or demands. One day, he was about to take a nap in a stairwell when he comes across another student by the name of Mafuyu Satou. At first glance he’s pretty aloof, but the second Mafuyu met Uenoyama he couldn’t stop hanging around him. After having quite the hard past, Mafuyu took to Uenoyama’s kindness (or whatever you call it) and took a fascination with him. He even managed to join the band Uenoyama was in. While Uenoyama had his reservations over this sudden change, he finds himself dealing with feelings he’s never felt before.

Is this love that he’s feeling? God, I hope so! BETWEEN THE SUB AND THE DUB: At the moment, no licensors have taken this anime and it’s only available through Crunchyroll. I swear Yuuma Uchida is having one hell of a year in the anime voice world. I know he’s been around for a couple of years and really hit it off with roles on Banana Fish and ReLIFE. But this year with his main roles on Kono Oto Tomare and the Fruits Basket reboot have really given him quite the boost. Give this boy a Seiyuu Award! Here’s what you might recognize these folks from. *Uenoyama is played by Yuuma Uchida (known for Kyo on Fruits Basket 2019, Eiji Ootori on UtaPri, Chika on Kono Oto Tomare, Ash on Banana Fish, Ooga on ReLIFE, and Shirazu on Tokyo Ghoul :re) *Mafuyu is played by Shougo Yano (known for Nanao on Tsurune) DISLIKED CHARACTER: In a yaoi-esque series, what is the one element I despise more than life itself? The cock-blocker! Actually, this is a trait I see in other genres of animes. Simply put, these are the characters who think they know one character better than anybody else and have this aura of jealousy because some new guy is in the picture. But when I see an annoying bitch hanging around a potentially cute ship and cock-blocking the cuteness, I lose my shit!

Fuck is this lady’s name? Kasai?! Whatever, cock-blocks like you need to go away! Though I will give her some leeway as she does apologize later in the series! It’s just that I found what she did to Uenoyama to be a bit of a “dick-move”. I’ll just be happy if I don’t see her in any upcoming projects this series has. SHIPPING: I knew I was expecting something to eventually happen with the Uenoyama x Satou ship. But I didn’t expect much from Haruki x Aki! Let’s get crackin’!

*Uenoyama x Mafuyu: From the beginning, I'm like, I want this to happen one day…but I know Mafuyu is still in pain after losing the love of his life. For the majority of this series, I see Mafuyu being aloof and depressed. The only exception is when he’s playing the guitar with Uenoyama (at least at the beginning). As we all know, Mafuyu has been in pain ever since losing his best friend and boyfriend, Yuki a year prior. As for Uenoyama, feelings started to develop once he spent a lot more time with Mafuyu. We even get a realization for Uenoyama when he learned about Mafuyu’s love, he got jealous. Aw, our boy loves Mafuyu! I’ll delve deeper into what happens after a certain point in the ending.

*Haruki x Aki: So I didn’t expect any kind of chemistry with these two outside of the band. But it turns out Haruki has had a crush on Aki since meeting him at college. Their friendship and becoming bandmates kind of came without any kind of super drama. And Haruki has been able to keep his feelings in check when he’s playing in the band with Aki. I mean, Haruki is pretty strict about dipping your pen in the company ink (if you get my meaning). It’s just that he does get blushy when he’s super close to him. Like when he’s being pinned down on the bed because Aki had a few too many beers and Haruki is just embarrassed. Unfortunately for this ship and for Haruki…Aki has a boyfriend!

I don’t like Aki’s boyfriend. No way, no way, I think he needs a new one! *sighs* …Yeah, I gotta talk about it…

*Mafuyu x Yuki: So Yuki’s reveal was building throughout the series that made the audience wonder if this was an unrequited love of Mafuyu’s, a sensei who can’t love him now, or someone who is no longer with us. But once you understood that Mafuyu and Yuki’s relationship dates back to when they were children and they have such a history, you can feel that pain Mafuyu carries with him everyday. Yuki would be there for him during tough times, including dealing with an abusive father, yeah, our boy had some issues. Yuki was a seemingly good friend and lover to Mafuyu. There was even a cute moment when Yuki takes him to the ocean, saying he wants Mafuyu to remember this moment. But what happened to Yuki? Unfortunately after the boys began high school and went to different schools, their relationship strained. And then one day Yuki was found dead due to alcohol poisoning (weird, I would have guessed suicide). Yes, Yuki’s death was freakin’ traumatic for Mafuyu. This was a big enough shock to the system to cause him to not be social and to carry around his dead lover’s guitar everywhere (even though he doesn’t know how to play it). And yes, in that song the group sang in the 9th episode, Mafuyu went the extra mile to express his feelings to his long-lost love. I would have to wonder a bunch of ‘what ifs’ with Yuki. Because poor Uenoyama is fighting against a dead guy. MAFUYU’S SONG: Just watch.

My boy Mafuyu here is giving me some super feels with this song!

EPISODE TITLES: Ever notice how all the episode titles are named after famous songs. Let’s just say I was thrown off when the episodes were named Creep (song by Radiohead), The Reason (song by Hoobastank), and Wonderwall (song by Oasis). God only knows what the name of the movie will be! I’ll laugh if it’s The Dope Show, Bittersweet Symphony, or I Alone. ENDING: So Haruki, Aki, and Uenoyama were given the opportunity to perform in front of an audience. Now the big question is if Mafuyu is up to the challenge of performing with the rest of the group. He only just recently joined the group and isn’t that great playing on the guitar. But the boys have hope with his vocals. He does have a good voice. It’s just that up until the night of the performance, Mafuyu hadn’t written down any lyrics. No question this boy has something to get off his chest, it’s just that Mafuyu was conflicted moments until they go on stage. It wasn’t until they were on stage where Mafuyu let out everything in their opening song. That heartbreak of losing the person you loved just shook the audience to its core and hit every single person there. Mafuyu’s friends were happy that he finally released all that pain he’s been holding in. Uenoyama’s classmates were inspired to hold onto the person they love tightly. And after the performance, we got our moment we fangirls have waited for since episode 1…

A MOTHER-FLIPPIN’ KISSUUU! Although this kiss (while passionate), was kind of forgotten on Uenoyama’s side as he forgot what he did and Mafuyu caught a fever shortly after the performance. I know Uenoyama has been wanting to do this because throughout the series, we kept seeing the boy conflicted over him liking Mafuyu. He even got jealous over a dead guy! We know he likes Mafuyu and we know that kiss after Mafuyu's performance was more than just a "Good job, mate" kiss. So will Uenoyama's feelings be returned? After Uenoyama came to terms over what he did and Mafuyu recovered from his fever, Mafuyu took Uenoyama to the ocean. I know this was a little symbolic for Mafuyu as Yuki brought him there when they were dating. And while there, Mafuyu told Uenoyama that he liked him. And Uenoyama noticed that...

IT’S MUTUAL! HIS LOVE IS MUTUAL! But then, Uenoyama remembers an ugly reality. Long before Mafuyu joined the band, the other guys were talking about a band breaking up over two of the bandmates getting involved with each other (romantically) and Uenoyama said some pretty…well, hypocritical things. That’s why many folks try to steer away from dating someone who’s a co-worker, a co-star, and in this case, bandmate. This is also a driving factor why Aki will never be the one to step up and tell Haruki he loves him. Haruki’s gotta be the one to leave that dickhead boyfriend of his. LEAVE HIM ALREADY! Regardless, Haruki and Aki are both happy for Uenoyama and Mafuyu’s new love. And now the boys feel refreshed in trying to come up with a second song, do a photo shoot, and even come up with a steady band name, “Given”. And so we get this cute end with a lingering hope that a season two will come and… Or a movie! Damn, that was fast, guys! Okay Crunchyroll, when this comes out, I want you guys to hop on it and get this movie in theaters. I don’t care if it’s in Seattle, just get it shown in WA. The ball is in your court now, don’t fuck this up! Also...

Uenoyama, please protect this boy's smile. I like this anime! I have such a weakness for animes involving characters in bands. And believe it or not, it was not because of Gravitation. For me, it was because of NANA. I fell in love with the songs and the characters and the simple story. Now of course this anime fell way too close to Gravitation’s orbit and that’s because of the yaoi aspect. My only gripe is that we really only got one memorable song (aside from the opening and ending theme). But it’s only the beginning the way I see it. I hope that Mafuyu is able to sing some more. And with a new movie on the horizon, I’m severely hoping for a soundtrack filled with awesome music. Seriously, I will laugh if the title of the movie really is, Given: Bittersweet Symphony. I give a recommendation to those who love musical animes or those of you into Shounen-Ai. I’m into both and I don’t judge. Currently, Crunchyroll has all 11 episodes available for streaming.

[zigzagzipwriting]

WMaCC? Relationship Between Your Characters

The way your character interact/act around others, how they think about other characters, how their love life affects them and their journey, and a character’s opinions and grudges show your readers a lot about your character without directly telling them. For example, it showcases your character’s thoughts and views, their flaws and strengths, and establishes other characters in your story. Relationships don’t always have to be cliqued romance. While those are perfectly fine, try adding some diversity to your story to make it stand out in your reader's mind. Some examples of relationship types are:

Aromantic or Asexual relationships

Parent/Child

Siblings

Aggressor/Victim

Rivals/Adversaries

Best Friends

Boss/Employee

Caregiver/Receiver

Cop/Criminal

Partners (in business, crime, etc.)

Slave/Master

Human/Environment

Human/God

Human/Pet

Casual Acquaintances

Unrequited/one-sided love

And of course, romance

So, what can you do to utilize these relationships in perspective of showcasing your character and making your story unique/leave an impact on your reader?

Make your character stop and think about others

Give an introspect/insight to your character’s inner thoughts

Uses pros and cons, love and hate, doubts, opinions, likes, and insecurities in   inner dialogue add more building and relatability to your character

Use a soliloquy

Challenge your character's thoughts and feelings, especially of others (specifically people they know personally)

“I love him, but why?”

“What’s the real reason I hate her?”

“What needs to happen so I can get over this?”

“Will they like me?”

“Will they understand me?”

“Who am I against?”

“Who am I for?”

Give your character strong opinions

Opinions and personal values make your character unique and let them stand out in a crowd. Opinions are your character’s voice; every character has different opinions and expresses them differently, even if they might seem similar, and they can change over time due to experiences, growth, and conflict

Even if your character is shy or introverted, let them showcase their opinions in their inner dialogue and thoughts. While it should match your character’s overall personality (unless they are being suppressed in some way on the outside or suppressing inner thoughts), allow your character to show how they feel about a certain person or event. Remember, no one (except the reader, who does not exist in your story) can hear your character's thoughts, so they don’t have to worry what others think of their inner opinions

Not every character needs to be good at expressing their opinions. Some might stutter, or not know the right words to use, or become frustrated. The big ‘rallying speech’ might come naturally to some characters, and some might mess up. It all adds to the differences between characters

What are your character’s opinions of others? What are their thoughts? Their feelings for/against certain people, events, actions, places, etc.? How do they react to the conflict?

Remember, if a character has personality traits or feelings of anger/fury, they are more likely to show their strong opinions either as thoughts or to other characters. The same can be done using ‘extreme’ emotions or situations with high pressure or atmosphere, like love, stress, or when a character simply has enough

Use gossip, love, callousness/hate, and shallow or deep thinking for a wide variety of opinions. Some characters have simpler thought patterns, while others have deep logic based. Some are driven by emotion or creativity, and those thoughts might be a little messier

Play a game of risk with your character

Have your character make sacrifices/risk something for another. It can be anything from a friendship, job, personal, or the arguably most impactful, personal safety and risking their life or even dying for someone

Putting everything at stake despite personal interest/safety - raises the stakes of the conflict and adds high tension to the scene. Show that you’re not afraid to let a character be injured or even die to add realism to the scene (you do not have to kill the character, but if the threat is real enough, your reader will take the story more seriously and worry for your character). Essentially, make one of your characters willing to die for another, and put them in the position where that could happen

Risks are a test of character - what are they willing to do, and what is their limit

Risks and the threat of loss in any way make your reader root for the character

Add a hypotenuse/triangle

I know, it’s been done to death already. But there is power in a love triangle, square, or a change in the rules for something unique. It’s a huge test of each character, and reveals traits, both positive and negative, in the ‘competition’, and causes tension between all characters involved. It also leaves an emotional impact on the reader, especially when one character ‘loses’ or intentionally gives up for another character’s sake.

Complications in love, especially across multiple people, can lead to complex relationships

Make all characters flushed out and 3D for full impact - Don’t show immediately which two characters are going to ‘hook up’ in the end (if any pairings do) by having one character have no impact or form. It’s boring, cliqued, and drops

Make a reason why a pair can’t be together

Human, animal, career, addiction, a call to adventure, obligation, etc.

Emotions & relationships aren’t rational - motivations that can lead to quick, bad decisions

Some examples of unique and impactful love triangles are ‘Angelica, Eliza, and Hamilton’ from the musical “Hamilton”, the complex love square between two characters with secret identities such as ‘Marinette/Ladybug and Adrien/Cat Noir’ from “The Miraculous Tales of Ladybug and Cat Noir”, or complications between the ‘villain’/antagonist and the ‘hero’/protagonist (especially with hidden identities), which often leads to hurt from either end and emotional sympathy from the reader

Leverage the group

People act differently depending on the situation and who they are with. For example, a normally cheerful person might turn cold around someone they dislike, or a social person in a group might get awkward in a one-on-one. In a group, relationships and alliances are ever-changing, depending on circumstances

Some places where leveraging the group takes place are a mob, gang, organization, work, school, or large event

A character might put on a ‘social/public mask’, especially if they are a victim of abuse or other forms of suppressant (be it personal or outward)

Befriend ambiguity

Don’t over explain relationships; let the reader make inferences. Not everything needs a full detail story on all the ‘wrongs’  a character has done, or every interaction. You don’t have to say this person is a lover, or that this parent is an alcoholic. Instead, use body language, descriptions, and how that character interacts with the main character to show who they are

Show, not tell

A reader’s instinct is to assume that there is more than meets the eye; they recognize a person has many layers, and that some layers are more hidden than others. For example, use contradictions to show diversity, like how in every adult, there’s a bit of a child, or in every cop, there’s a bit of a criminal. There’s a little ‘good’  in your antagonist/villain, and a little ‘bad/evil’ in your protagonist/hero

Tap into the power of a grudge

Show your reader if your character is the kind who holds grudges, forgives, or acts on revenge. It adds to your relationships, especially when a character has been ‘wronged’, even accidentally, and can be impactful in the relationship between the protagonist and antagonist. Does one character forgive the other? Do they take action against them out of vengeance? Grudges can be from either side, and they can be both ways. In addition, a grudge doesn’t have to be suited on facts. There should be a reason, not just instant ‘hate’, but it can be accidental or a misunderstanding

Characters with a certain type of personality are more likely to hold and act on impulsive grudges to the point of vengeance & destruction. For example:

Someone with very low self-esteem but a big ego (ie. the stereotypical ‘popular/mean’ kid)

‘Eye for an eye’: those who suffer pay back the world (the more suffering the character has induced, the more grudgeful revenge) ~ this is a common backdrop of victims, and a possible backstory for antagonist/villains

A sensitive character + suffering mass injustices, intolerable shame, stress, and degrading = believable eventual snap/murderous rage ~ it’s possible for a sweet character to have a realistic snap, especially if they hold everything to themselves without an outlet

Make the reader wish for the character to snap back

Don’t overlook everyday interactions

A chance encounter with a stranger can be powerful enough to transform a moment, or a day, even to change your life

Acquaintanceships and how your character interacts with close strangers shows the reader your character’s social views/standings

No relationship is clear-cut/black and white;  little details scatter off to form webs of interconnecting stories

Let your characters approach others, glance off them, then continue on different trajectories - everyone has their own story in life, and sometimes stories interconnect through a shared space, goal, or person

If you have multiple stories that take place in the same universe, it can be a fun nod to subtly include references or characters from other series for readers

[travllingbunny]

The 100 rewatch: 1x02 Earth Skills

I’m a new fan of The 100, who first binged it last year, August to November. This is my first full rewatch of the show. I was planning to start it anyway and finish it before the season 6 premiere on April 30, and when I saw that Fox Serbia was airing a rerun (Monday to Friday, 40 min. after midnight, with repeats the next day), starting on 1st February, it was a great opportunity to start my rewatch in HDTV on my beautiful new TV. I decided to do write-ups and tag other fans on SpoilerTV website, as I did when I was first watching the show. But my posts turned into full blown essays. So, finally, after over a week, I’ve realized: Why don’t I post them on my Tumblr blog, too? I’ll copy my write-ups of the first 7 episodes, and then I’ll post my rewatch posts after I watch each episode. (The next one, 1x08, is on Monday’Tuesday.)

Spoilers below for all 5 seasons of the show. I go of on a tangents and make a lot of references to future events.

...........................

The first 2 episodes of season 1 are its weakest, just as I remember them. But initially I thought episode 1x02 was worse - I had mixed feelings about the Pilot, but then really disliked the second episode. This time, however, the Pilot was much worse than I remembered it, while this episode was... well, pretty much the same, but I enjoyed it more this time. Because, when I first watched the Pilot, I focused on all the new info on the show's premise, the setting, the universe, the SciFi stuff, and pretty much ignored all the cringey early teen soapy stuff (which I didn't even remember). But then the second episode came, and all the cringey teen soapy stuff in that episode just came right at me and annoyed the heck out of it. So this time, I already remembered it, so I could focus on other things.

BTW, I need to have good laugh at the often stated claim that The 100 doesn't focus on romance or do much romance or set up ships. The show does romance all the time. There are ships all over the place, but most of them pretty much suck, especially since most of them are poorly written insta-romances. And these early episodes are full of various romances and potential romances, and love triangles (which some people say the show has stopped doing... except it never did - *cough season 5 *cough* - but at least it scaled back on it a bit). 

Now don't misunderstand me - I don't mind that there's a lot of that, what I did mind is how badly all of that was written in these early episodes. Later, the show did lose most of its early CW-ness and start doing romantic plots better, in some cases at least. (But it also started doing them even worse, in some other cases.)

Rating: 4.5/10

First introduction of Raven, and she immediately shows that she's smart, capable and awesome. At this point, she seems almost perfect, but we know she was just initially meant to be a temporary supporting character and romantic obstacle for Finn/Clarke. We find out that she's the youngest zero G engineer in 52 years. She's also the first person to figure out that the Delinquents aren't dying, but simply taking their trackers off. How come this never crossed the minds of any of the Ark leaders? They came off a bit dumb here.

First meaningful interactions between Abby and Raven - the start of their friendship/pseudo-mother daughter relationship. Abby enlists Raven to fix an old escape pod so she(Abby) could get to the ground. Raven insists she will go, too, since she also has a loved one there. Multiple mentions of her boyfriend, and I can now see the big hints with the origami that Finn is that boyfriend. I missed that the first time, which is lucky, or I would have hated this episode even more, for trying to set up more than one annoying insta-love-triangle involving Finn and Clarke. I think this is the first time we get a mention of a year? But not the year when the show takes place. The escape pod is a 130 year old piece of junk that was found when they rescued MIR-3 in 2102. At least that gives us an idea of what century it is. ( The 100 wiki has a timeline and says the year is 2149, IIRC, but I don't know where that info is from.) I remember that Clarke, Abby and Raven were my favorite characters by far, followed by Monty, and pretty much the only characters I really liked (I was intrigued by Bellamy, and to a lesser extent Octavia, but I didn't exactly like them), since they were the only characters doing smart and good and pragmatic stuff and trying to save people. Then later, during season 1, Raven fell down a few places in my rankings, because I was so frustrated with her moping over Finn. Well, Wells was OK, but I didn't like some things they were doing with him here. One of the things I remembered best from this episode is that it clumsily tried to set up a Wells/Clarke/Finn love triangle, and that it made me roll my eyes so much. And for whatever reason, Bellamy was the one to talk about it to Wells and go on about how Clarke supposedly doesn't see Wells next to Finn, blah blah. Octavia isn't the only Blake with cringey dialogue anymore. Sorry, I'm gonna go on a mini-rant. Why was it necessary for the show to imply that Wells was in love with Clarke? You know how some people claim that the show is so into platonic male/female friendships (which somehow always is all about Clarke and Bellamy, because other male and female characters on the show aren't ever friends or something)? Yeah, right. Clarke and Wells were BFFs from childhood, grew up together - if you're looking for a "sibling-like" relationship between people on the show who are not related, that's the closest thing to it, but apparently, Wells couldn't have done all those sacrifices for Clarke if he wasn't in love with her. Right? But Clarke only sees him as a BFF, and he is so important to her... that the show had her mourn him for about 10 minutes in episode 4 after he was killed, and then never mention him again. If they ever actually wanted a great completely platonic, sibling-like close relationship between a man and a woman, that was a great opportunity. But they obviously didn't care. And speaking of people who grew up together and refer to each other as family, so they would therefore fit the idea of sibling-like relatively well (unlike Clarke and Bellamy, who didn't even know each other or interact with each other till they were 23 and almost 18, respectively)... well, there's also Finn and Raven. Who are also boyfriend and girlfriend. Kinda weird. I wonder when the writers decided to kill of Wells. I think it definitely was only after this episode, because this episode spends a lot of time building up Wells as a heroic character and setting up that love triangle that never goes anywhere, because Wells dies in 1x03. I think that, if the writers were at all planning an "endgame" (though I hate that word) love interest for Clarke, it was probably Wells at this point, because I don't think they were considering Bellamy that way at this point, and Finn, while clearly meant as the initial love interest, has False Romantic Lead written all over him. I sometimes wonder what the show would look like if they hadn't killed off Wells. I think Finn's "peacemaker" role in season 1b was probably planned for Wells. But I'm really relieved that we didn't get a love triangle that's all "Unlucky Childhood Friend/nice guy in unrequited love with a girl who is into another guy who is charming but kind of a jerk/cheater, until she finally realizes he's the one for her", because I hate that trope so much. Sorry, Finn lovers, if any of you are reading this - but Finn comes off even worse on rewatch than he did when I watched it the first time. He was always a guy who's just there and whose only interest seemed to be following Clarke around and flirting with her, but his time I'm noticing things like, even when he does good things, he only does them after he's realized Clarke would like him to do it, and tries to make himself look good and be the guy that she needs in her life. When I first watched this, I just had profound indifference towards him, which grew into active annoyance in this episode. And I didn't even realize at the time that he had a girlfriend on the Ark. Or that, after Clarke shamed him for not wanting to come and help rescue Jasper, he only changed his mind and came after Clarke had made Bellamy join the rescue party. My annoyance was initially mostly because of the scene where they are on the way to finding Jasper and saving him, and Finn decides to instead convince Clarke that she's wound up too tight and should just relax and they should splash each other with water. Which would be OK, if Jasper wasn't potentially dying. Priorities? And there was also his pop psychology where he tells Clarke that she is so desperate to save Jasper because she couldn't save her father, and we're obviously supposed to see it as super--meaningful. Is it just me that thinks that wanting to save people in general, and especially those you know, is a normal human reaction? Which is why Clarke was the character I immediately liked and related to. And also why this scene annoyed me so much. My feelings on it are exactly the same now, except maybe now I'm not sure that the show ever even meant for the Finn/Clarke pairing to be seen as an especially good one. Meanwhile, it seems that the show staff had realized between the Pilot and the second episode that Bob was super hot, so now Bellamy gets to be shirtless and with ruffled hair that looks much better on him, and is just friendly parting from some random Delinquent girl he's had sex with and who never appears again. I guess the casual sex (and later threesomes) were supposed to be a part of his 'bad boy' persona, since it pretty much stopped once the show started making him into a more heroic figure. Even though there's actually nothing wrong about single people having casual sex for pleasure, so it's not like that marks him as 'bad'. (The show, however, seemed less judgy about casual sex in later seasons, so I don't know.) However, he does a lot of other thing in this episode that are actually bad, like making the kids take off their wristbands so they'll have food, or acting dictator-like ("I will not be disobeyed") and over-protective of Octavia, including punishing Atom for making out with her. I didn't hate Bellamy early on as many did, but he frustrated me a lot, and was definitely at his most annoying in 1x02. However, I always had a lot of leeway for both him and Octavia, no matter how annoying they acted at this point, because of their backstory. And now I can even understand his over-protectiveness a bit better, knowing hat happened the last time he tried to let Octavia enjoy life. Much of the episode was about Octavia trying to find a guy to make out with, and specifically trying to make Atom (the guy Bellamy charged with protecting her). make out with her. She's being a huge brat at this point, but it's understandable - she was isolated, under the floor and locked up, all her life, and now she wants to be free and enjoy it. One interesting moment is when she told Atom: "Wall won't stop what's out there, we need weapons" - which is the first time she sounded like later Octavia. But her later love of fighting also makes sense for her character - fighting, especially with bare hands or cold weapons, is an energetic activity that produces an adrenaline rush, kind of like sex/making out. The scene where she chases butterflies in the woods and then makes out with Atom was one of the most visually beautiful. It looked very romantic, in the sense of enjoying life and nature. Not in the sense of actual romance, unless by 'romance' one means 'making out with a random person you met a day ago and barely know.' But to be fair, even Octavia's upcoming big OTP romance with Lincoln began with little more than physical attraction, and she knew him even less than Atom by the time they hooked up. The best interactions Ocfavia had in the episode were with Monty - the start of one of the better, underrated m/f genuinely platonic friendships on the show. This exchange was quite interesting: Monty: "Living under the floor all your life, it's amazing that you're not a complete basket case". Octavia: "Who says I'm not?" Monty was really cool in this episode - while Octavia was having some drama with Atom and some other guy, he was like "quiet, guys, I'm working" and was just calmly working on trying to make radio communications with the Ark possible. A bit more backstory on him and Jasper: they obviously have known each other for a long time, and Monty compares his relationship with Jasper to the Blakes, saying that Jasper may not actually be his brother but they are just as close. However, the Blakes aren't really like a regular sibling relationship, it's one of those sibling relationships (like Katniss/Prim in The Hunger Games) where the elder sibling had to grow up early and take care of the younger, so it's more like a parent/child relationship. Which is really one of the main problems of their relationship - Bellamy sees Octavia almost as his child and is extremely protective and sacrificial (the way we otherwise see parents act towards their children in The 100), and Octavia is constantly rebelling against him as kids rebel against authority. First significant interaction between Monty and Clarke, too. When Wells and Monty volunteer to save Jasper, Clarke tells Monty to stay behind because he's too important for the group's survival - he was raised on a Farm station, trained as an engineer. "food and communications. What's up here (*touches his head*) is going to save us all". (And how right she was!) That's some good, smart, pragmatic thinking - and she also managed to convince him without having to say that he also wouldn't be the most useful in a fight. I notice so many gender stereotypes in how the characters are written in these early episodes, more than the show usually has afterwards. Jasper and Monty were constantly talking about impressing girls in the Pilot, Jasper thought Finn had "game", and in this episode, we constantly have women shaming men into doing things by implying they would look weak or cowardly otherwise. Octavia tries to make Atom let her make out with guys/make out with her by saying he would be her brother's "bitch" otherwise (when did she learn to talk like that? I guess, during those two-three days on Earth?). Clarke tells Finn how disappointed she is that he refuses to join the rescue party, calling him a coward. (Though Monty shames Finn, too, saying "Jasper looked up to you". Which doesn't mean much, since the reason Jasper looked up to him is because he thought Finn was good at impressing girls.) And then Clarke makes Bellamy join the rescue party by implying he will look scared in front of the others/less brave than she is, otherwise (though that was more about Bellamy having to maintain authority in the group - which he needs for his own reasons), Then Bellamy enlists his sidekick Murphy to come, too. Murphy: "What are we doing? I didn't think we were in the rescuing business." Oh, you have no idea. The interactions between Bellamy and Clarke in this episode were quite interesting. I didn't ship them at this point, but I know now that some people already did, and I can see why. The scenes where they are into each other's faces and being antagonistic... well, this is the scene where Clarke says she will never take off the wristband, and Bellamy calls her "Brave princess" sarcastically (?):

What are you doing here, Bellamy? If he means to try to be snarky or antagonistic, he's not doing a good job, because "Brave princess" is not an insult, it sounds like he's impressed by her. (Which he probably is, though I'm not sure he's aware of it yet.) I'm sure he thinks she should hate her, because she is making things difficult for him and she's one of the privileged high class people from the Ark. That's what Bellamy means, at least at first, when he calls her "princess" - he's not using that nickname to flirt with her, like Finn. At least, I'm sure he does't mean to flirt. But... he kind of looks like he's flirting. I think, at this point, he's really, really confused.

And that's exactly the moment when Finn comes along, finally having decided to join the party, and says "Come up with your own nickname". Finn seems very possessive over... that nickname.

Later when they find Jasper, he gets all take-chargey and tells Wells to keep an eye on Bellamy, and Murphy to come help him take Jasper down from the tree. I can't help but think of another, far less successful and very unfortunate rescue mission, in season 2, where Murphy will also end up as Finn's reluctant sidekick.

I love the way that Bellamy acts like he's so ruthless (which he probably believes himself to be, much more than he actually is), when he tells Murphy he will take Clarke's wristband off even if he has to cut off her arm to do it...but then later, when she almost falls into the pit full of spikes, he instinctively grabs her arm and saves her life - and then has the look on his face "What did I just do? What am I doing? Why I am doing this?" He really is confused.

Early season 1 Bellamy is such a hot mess. Kind of like Clarke will end up being a hot mess in season 5, and similarly impulsive, emotionally damaged and preoccupied with just protecting their "child" while ignoring the big picture, while season 1 Clarke/season 5 Bellamy are acting pragmatically while trying to save everybody. They've really switched roles. And I expect season 6 Bellamy to help Clarke to get back to who she used to be, just as Clarke helped him find himself in season 1.

I love the song "Can't Pretend" by Tom Odell, which closes this episode. (I'll be seeing him in concert in a week.) But I didn't initially even notice it in the episode - I only paid attention to it when I saw some The 100 fanvideos with it. It's too emotional and the lyrics don't really fit either of the rather shallow romances (Finn/Clarke and Octavia/Atom) whose scenes it covers.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dUmtXzuSGu8

[dumdeeedum]

A The Magicians Rant

I just got into this show fairly recently but I’ve now seen it a few times now and frankly, I’m frustrated as fuck with it, especially after tonight’s episode. No one is saying it’s an extraordinarily written show, I’m certainly not saying that, but some of this shit is absurd already, especially when it comes to the topic of Eliot and Quentin potentially becoming a couple. They’ve built it up in a way that would make it very easy to back out of, I think that’s how they intended it, and at this point it seems like little more than queer-baiting to me.  Don’t read any more if you want to avoid spoilers for the television series The Magicians through season 4 and tonight’s episode, please!

The more I watch this show the more I’m convinced that the writers are happy to allow their mostly queer audience to ride with the allusions to representation and essentially be seeing a different show than is being presented to them out of desperation. That’s fucked up and utterly predictable at this point and some of these writers have priors in doing this. And I know why people in the LGBTQA community do it, because they don’t have representation the way heterosexual people do so it’s exciting to be able to see themselves represented or to be moving in the direction of representation. We heterosexual people have had our representations of romances on all forms of media and we know the feeling when one is done well. Not that Quentin and Alice were done well because she was never introduced as her own person but as a romantic interest to Quentin but that’s another topic. They never promised us that Eliot and Quentin would happen, and quite frankly, before season 4 I didn’t even see it. And this is coming from someone who has been wearing the slash goggles for the better part of her life, or, more accurately, can see chemistry between people and enjoys that chemistry developing to the point where I feel it would be nice to see it manifest itself in a romance. We do this all the time with male/female relationships of any kind but the idea of heteronormativity makes it seem absurd that people would see it for same-sex couples. And that’s not to say that Hale and Jason or even Eliot and Quentin don’t have chemistry, they absolutely do, we’ve just never had them in the same place at the same time for long enough to see it manifest organically the way we have other characters in other media or even the same series. They’re very seldom together and the entire time Quentin is chasing Alice. That shit may have been OK 20 years ago when the likes of “Smallville” was doing it but it’s 2019 and even in Smallville Lex and Clark spent a LOT of time together! And I still don’t see it ANY TIME before season 4 after having seen season 4, even with the Life in a Day episode. I didn’t see it because frankly I don’t think it was the writer’s intention until they ret-conned the situation in season 4 or saw an opportunity to allude to it and get people’s hopes up for views only to dash them later. I’m going to explain why and it’s going to get long but no one is holding a gun to anyone’s head here so, y’know, do with it what you will.

Anything and everything except the kiss in season 3 has mostly been on Eliot’s side, and that’s fine, if you want to go with an unrequited romance story, that’s fine, it happens and ultimately they can build something else for Eliot with someone else. He deserves that and it would give more meaningful homosexual man representation if they did that.

But that isn’t what they’ve been doing. What they’ve been doing is jerking people around and having them keep watching week to week waiting for something that isn’t happening while the other developing heterosexual pairings are put on fast forward even though they, especially Julia and Penny, should realistically be more slow burn given their specific situation and Kady. I’m not even going to get into how hard I dislike Margo and Josh and the idea that incredibly hot women should always settle for mediocre men, that’s some writer’s male fantasy bullshit and I’m not here for it. And yes, I’m basing it on looks because we don’t exist in a vacuum and it’s all too common for television and other forms of media to pair gorgeous women with mediocre at best men or men whom are too old for them or men who are fat when we don’t get thin, physically fit, “hot” men with fat women unless the entire story is about how she’s fat and gets a hot man, no, miss me with this. But I digress. Up to now we still don’t have Quentin admitting his feelings for Eliot, at all, not really. What we can say for CERTAIN is that Quentin wants his friend back, as he would. The person’s feelings we have a better idea of are Eliot’s because his have been made more explicit in episode 5 of season 4. And that’s all we’ve gotten. We haven’t gotten any more about their time in Fillory than the flashes we saw in season 3 and none of the episodes thereafter explicitly told us that they were even a couple other than a brief kiss that can have a number of interpretations and their saying that they were family and families come in all shapes and sizes so I don’t expect that they have to be together to call themselves a family. The rest of season 3, by the way, ignores that anything happened between them, including the episode where Quentin is visited by the depression monster supposedly after he’s been rejected by Eliot, it never comes up. And then Quentin jump into bed with a fucking asshole lady who caused the suicide of a good man because she’s selfish trash, fine, whatever, he wants to get his dick wet and I don’t give a shit, trite. We didn’t get the allusion to them truly being a couple UNTIL season 4. And then Eliot turned Quentin down and I think it’s important that he did that and I think it was a good move for him because he’s absolutely right to question whether it can be replicated or even the entire validity of it. It’s absolutely OK for Eliot to question whether a man who has shown VERY little interest in other men other than a sexual encounter the show’s been telling us was a result of magic for 3 fucking seasons while he chases after a woman, is truly into him. And he shouldn’t have to settle or jump up like a dog because Quentin gives him the time of day for a second, no, because everyone deserves to feel like someone’s first choice and Eliot was not Quentin’s first choice even in Fillory. We also don’t truly know Eliot’s stance on polyamory (someone can correct me on this because I simply don’t remember if he mentions it) because we don’t even know whether Eliot and Quentin were together while Quentin was with Arielle, we just don’t, even after episode 5 of season 4. We also know that Quentin has psychological issues that cause him have escapist fantasies or seek an escape from his issues, Julia said it and he’s admitted it, and Eliot would have been an easy escape, after all, they worked in Fillory and he has those memories. But in their real world Quentin has a girl he loves who no longer wants much to do with him. Really, Quentin would need time to think about it now that they’re back and DO have options, after all, once again, Quentin has been chasing the same woman since the show began. Eliot telling Quentin that Quentin wouldn’t be Eliot’s first choice can be interpreted as a defense mechanism because Eliot doesn’t want to experience the rejection when Quentin leaves him for someone else the way he kind of did before, from what we saw when he kissed Eliot only to then marry Arielle. WHAT WE KNOW is that Quentin kissed Eliot in Fillory, Eliot kissed him back and then Quentin built a life with a woman, the first woman he meets, in fact. We can’t know what happens to people who are thrust into a completely different time and place with only each other for company. It could have been the drinking and Quentin being lonely and Eliot being there and familiar, it could have been that Quentin had some feelings for Eliot he finally felt he could act on (a year later), we simply don’t know. We don’t have that information. What we do know is that Eliot thinks it was situational on Quentin’s part and he’s right to question that, anyone would. When a show spends 3 seasons and a considerable amount of time in those 13 episode seasons pursuing a heterosexual romance it’s also OK for the viewer to wonder whether there’s any validity to the sprinkling of anything else we get. I’ll concede that Quentin may well be bisexual, we just haven’t seen it manifest itself in any meaningful way and even up to now the show is not giving us anything on Quentin’s part to suggest that he’s conflicted because he feels romantic love for Eliot. Eliot showing Quentin he was still in there by reminding him of their time together can be chalked up to Eliot knowing it’s something only Quentin would know to convince him. The kisses we got were blink and you miss it and Eliot is still being inhabited by the monster so we haven’t gotten the things we normally are accustomed to getting in media that are meant to show when people feel something more than friendship for one another: lingering glances, smiles, conversations with other characters about it, meaningful conversations with one another, touches, nothing. Eliot’s only romantically meaningful conversation with Quentin was with a Quentin that only exists in his mind. Eliot is Quentin’s friend, his first friend at Brakebills and it would make just as much sense if Quentin were upset at the prospect of losing his friend than at the prospect of losing a lover RIGHT NOW, in fact, it would make more sense. And he does have those memories but that doesn’t mean they’ve given us any reason to believe that anything will come of Eliot and Quentin’s relationship in terms of a romance. I genuinely feel right now that the fandom has been queer baited, tonight’s episode cemented that for me. I hope I’m wrong. I hope in 2019 we’re past that bullshit but time will tell on this one. And personally, I hope that if they were queer baiting that season 5 is their last season and they let Hale Appleman go because he’s a good actor and deserves to go on to work that won’t essentially use him as a plot device to get queer views with no follow through when we know a good amount of this show’s view-ship comes from the queer community. I hope they happen because I like the idea of them and what we have seen of them has been nice. When they’re actually in the room together Eliot is very tactile with Quentin and Quentin allows it and they CAN build on that, they just have to actually build on that. I think right now we’re all hoping we get Quentin admitting something to someone else because that’s all they can really do given the situation in the show; Eliot isn’t home right now. But they haven’t done that yet and tonight’s episode just seemed to foreshadow more Quentin and Alice (even though Alice kissing Quentin was super inappropriate and this show needs to check it’s fucking consent issues and enjoyment of their non-consensual storylines at the door because they overuse them and the reasons don’t matter anymore). And all of that after an episode where Quentin told Alice he didn’t love her anymore and several episodes before then Alice made it clear she wasn’t into him anymore, now it’s up in the air again and I don’t know what to make of it anymore. Really my wish for them is to be apart because they’re not good together but that would require giving Alice something to do that didn’t revolve around Quentin and apparently that’s too difficult. That’s really just my .25 cents on that shit cause I acknowledge it was long as fuck. I really just need this series to get better at the show don’t tell thing, television is a mostly visual media, especially when they only have 13 episodes to work with. They waste a LOT of time on weird shit when they could be developing characters. Last week Julia and Quentin could have had the Eliot conversation but instead we got an hour of on and off bullshit games with a leprechaun. I just don’t understand these choices at all but it’s a problem this series has as a whole, they don’t have time for a ton of filler nonsense but do it anyway. They never seem to have an issue with the heterosexual couples though, do they? Plenty of time to have Alice, Kady, Margo, or Julia gyrating on someone and making sex noises, right? Or Julia and Alice kissing, etc. etc. Makes me question what they’d do if they were serious about Eliot and Quentin, but I guess we all already know, right? Eliot and Quentin’s sex scene amounted to one shirtless kiss for a split second and then they kissed in Fillory for another few seconds. I don’t know, I wish I saw them as end game the way people do but I don’t work on faith like that. We’ll see what happens in the next couple of episodes.

[xswestallen]

I just wanna say that I loved your recent posts about Snowwest! Something I always hated about a lot of the flash fans is that they act like you can only like Caitlin or Iris, not both. And they act like theres this feud between them when both are great characters! The only problem with their relationship sometimes in the show is the lack of bond, not that they actually dislike each other. I do love that recently the show has been trying to fix this!

Thank you so much! The animosity between fans has frustrated me too! When I first entered the fandom online, I was shocked. It honestly scared me and almost made me leave the fandom. I love Iris Ann West and WestAllen is my ultimate OTP, but I also love Caitlin. Why is it so difficult for people to grasp that concept?????

All this bullshit goes back to stupid ship wars. A lot of Caitlin “fans” (I use quotes because I truly don’t believe they love Cait, if they did, they would show it by valuing her agency) think that in order to like her as a character you have to ship her with Barry. Because apparently, there is no way a female character can be great unless she’s with the male protagonist. SnowBarry started shitting on Iris, trying to say how she doesn’t deserve Barry, and they really haven’t let up, so Iris fans became super defensive of Iris and now, to many Iris fans, Caitlin has been tainted because of her mere association with the SnowBarry shippers, even though canon Caitlin and Barry were never a thing! Caitlin doesn’t want to date Barry, she never has! She was all about Ronnie in season 1, falling for “Jay” in season 2, and Julian in season 3. This season she is spending her free time with Wells at Jitters and supporting Iris as her maid of honor at the WestAllen wedding. Barry has never wanted to date Caitlin! He was all about Iris this whole time. When he tried to move on from Iris, he dated Linda and Patty, not Caitlin! He and Cait are just friends.

Like, ship whatever you want, but please stop trying to make Caitlin look like this heartbroken victim of unrequited love for Barry. She is a doctor, a genius, and an interesting character in her own right. She’s not sitting at home crying because Barry is with Iris, only these SnowBarry shippers are! Caitlin is living her best life and seems happier than she’s been since mid season 2 now that she finally has Killer Frost under control. You go, Caity!

There was also some drama during season 1 and season 2 because rumors swirled that Candice Patton and Danielle Panabaker don’t like each other. In some interviews from back then, Danielle talked about SnowBarry and said that viewers would have to watch and see if their friendship turned into anything more (which, duh, of course she’s going to say that! Promoting the show is her damn job. It wouldn’t make sense for her to say SnowBarry is never going to happen so those shippers should stop watching!!!!!) and she said that she thought the ship name was cute. WetsAllen shippers freaked the fuck out and have held a grudge against Danielle ever since. 

Personally, I get a little frustrated with my fellow WestAllen lovers here because I think they blew it out of proportion. Danielle never said anything that bad! But, people act like she said that Iris should be killed and Barry should marry Caitlin, when that is totally untrue! In her more recent interviews, like SDCC 2017, she said that Barry loves Iris and shot down a question from a SnowBarry shipping reporter! 

WestAllen shippers want her to explicitly state that SnowBarry won’t happen, but we need to understand why she can’t do that! It would be bad for the show’s promotion. Like it or not there are people who would stop watching if they woke up and realized WestAllen is endgame. It’s all about ratings, and while WestAllen is a lot more popular, the CW doesn’t want to lose any viewers. I’m sure the producer wouldn’t be too happy with Danielle or anyone if they said something that made a certain group in the fandom, however small, not want to watch anymore.

Then there’s the drama over Candice unfollowing Danielle on Instagram. The fact that people care about that and have made it into such a big deal is the pettiest, most immature shit I have ever seen. Is everyone 12 fucking years old? I have coworkers I don’t follow on social media. I have family I don’t follow on social media. It doesn’t mean I hate them or we have problems with each other, it just means I don’t want to see their posts about what salad they’re eating or some damn minion memes lol.

It also goes against everything Candice and Danielle are BOTH fighting for with Shethority. We need to stop pitting Candice and Danielle against each other. 

There is no reason to hate Caitlin as a character or Danielle as a person. They aren’t the ones trashing Iris and sending hate to Candice! It’s certain portion of Caitlin “fans” and SnowBarry shippers who are doing that. Shame them, go after them. Don’t just blindly hate Caitlin, anybody who enjoys her character, Danielle, and anyone who doesn’t hate Danielle.

Anyway, sorry for my rant. I know that kind of came out of nowhere, I just get too fired about this topic because I am really frustrated lol! 

[mewgagotoku-kiwami]

[MAKOTO]

♔  IS YOUR MUSE TALL/SHORT/AVERAGE?
Short enough that the top shelf rarely gets a good dusting.

♔  ARE THEY OKAY WITH THEIR HEIGHT?
It was once a source of much chagrin, but she kind of likes being of a size to be enveloped by most people. That said, she finds crowds frustrating.

♔   WHAT’S THEIR HAIR LIKE? 
Soft and thick; she doesn’t leave much time between cuts because she dislikes the way it kinks out from her neck like her brother’s when it grows just a little too long.

♔ DO THEY SPEND A LOT OF TIME ON THEIR HAIR/WITH THEIR GROOMING? 
Not especially - she is always careful to dry it and brush it after washing, but the simple ease of her style suits her.

♔  DOES YOUR MUSE CARE ABOUT THEIR APPEARANCE
Not... so much. It’s important to look neat and tidy, but she’s not one to wear much makeup or dress in anything flashy outside of an occasion. She secretly wishes to know what it feels like to be one of the glamorous girls of Kamurocho, but believes it to be beyond her.

♔  DOES YOUR MUSE CARE ABOUT WHAT OTHERS THINK ABOUT THEM?
Yes. It is important to be kind, and she wants others to think well of her.

PREFERENCES

▸ INDOORS OR OUTDOORS?  Outdoors
▸ RAIN OR SUNSHINE?   Rain
▸ FOREST OR BEACH?   Forest
▸ PRECIOUS METALS OR GEMS?   Metals
▸ FLOWERS OR PERFUMES?  Flowers
▸ PERSONALITY OR APPEARANCE?  Personality
▸ BEING ALONE OR BEING IN A CROWD?   Being alone
▸ ORDER OR ANARCHY?   Order
▸ PAINFUL TRUTHS OR WHITE LIES?   Painful Truths
▸ SCIENCE OR MAGIC?   Magic
▸ PEACE OR CONFLICT?   Peace
▸ NIGHT OR DAY?   Day
▸ DUSK OR DAWN?   Dawn
▸ WARMTH OR COLD?  Cold
▸ MANY ACQUAINTANCES OR A FEW CLOSE FRIENDS?  A few close friends
▸ READING OR PLAYING A GAME?   Reading

QUESTIONNAIRE

▸ WHAT ARE SOME OF YOUR MUSE’S BAD HABITS?

She has a tendency to act before she thinks. She becomes very obsessive about certain things, and her struggles to find closure can put her in harms way. While she is generally amenable, she harbours a stubborn streak.

▸ HAS YOUR MUSE LOST ANYONE CLOSE TO THEM? HOW HAS IT AFFECTED THEM?

Yes, more than a few times. It taught her to live better, to take chances, to push herself. She doesn’t know when her own life could end, and knowing that somebody gave their life for hers gives it a value it did not have previously. It made her want to make a difference in the world, to stand on her own two feet and be a force for good.

▸ WHAT ARE SOME FOND MEMORIES YOUR MUSE HAS?

Although her childhood was far from idyllic, she cherishes sweet memories with her brother - setting off firecrackers, eating stolen candies and hiding from thunderstorms. There was a lot of conflict in her youth, but he would always protect her, and although his capacity for violence was sometimes shocking, she thinks fondly of his abundant love for her.

Working alongside Lee. Coming from nowhere in what was at the time her darkest hour, he gave her a purpose when she had lost her own. The work in his parlour gave her a safe place to find equilibrium, to grow accustomed to the darkness around her, and to begin to regain her confidence. She misses him dearly.

▸ IS IT EASY FOR YOUR MUSE TO KILL?

No. I don’t think she could bring herself to do it. There was a moment in time when she was absolutely prepared to have somebody else kill on her behalf, but even the recollection of it repulses her. It went against her code of living in a moment of impossible grief, and the thought that she could be glad for the death of another is something which frightens her a little. (She is, however, truly grateful for one death in particular, and even that is something she finds abhorrent. She doesn’t like to think ill of the dead, no matter who they were.)

▸ WHAT’S IT LIKE WHEN YOUR MUSE BREAKS DOWN?

Terrible. 😂 She is quick to cry, and will descend rapidly into bone-shaking sobs which prevent her from doing anything else. She would like to pretend that she has moved past a full-on meltdown, but it is definitely still a part of her. There is also a point where tears turn to an absolute stillness at the very end of her tether. This is a place she is deathly afraid of, and would never wish to see again.

▸ IS YOUR MUSE CAPABLE OF TRUSTING SOMEONE WITH THEIR LIFE?

Absolutely. She had no choice for so long. It has rarely ended well for her, but she is acutely aware of her own mortality and her weakness. She would rather not be in a situation where it is necessary to trust another like this, but with her ideals and goals, knows it is surely inevitable.

▸ WHAT’S YOUR MUSE LIKE WHEN THEY’RE IN LOVE?

Besotted, supportive and so proud. She cannot get the person off her mind. She is the kind of person who will pick up silly little gifts while out shopping, just to surprise her lover or to make them smile. She is tactile and giving, and rarely wants to be far from her lover’s side. When unrequited, she is respectful of distance but it eats away at her. She would sooner keep it to herself than ruin somebody else’s life.

TAGGED BY:  @iheartkiryu 💕
TAGGING: anyone!