#(also!!!! if you yourself have ever taped a show feel free to drop a link here!!)

[jennyfromthebes]

huge fucking shout-out to the live taping community within the tMG fanbase, by the way. everyone who's ever taped a show is a legend and I appreciate all of them so much.

[heart-strong]

An Ode To Science Beaker PJ’s- Spencer Reid x gn!Reader

gif credit to @0420-1102​

Summary: gn!reader takes care of Spencer after coming home from being held captive by Tobias Hankel (season 2 episode 14 and 15). Reader and Spencer have been dating for two years.

A/N: YALL I think my fics are just going to be long because I love writing so much and I haven’t had writing inspiration in so long. Thank you for all the kind words about I Have a Fever, if you haven’t checked out my first Spencer/ Criminal Minds fic yet please do I’m so proud of it but heres this new one! 

Also I mention this in my About me section but I’ll mention it here, I think Penelope and I are similar in that we call everyone “darling” just as a term of endearment, so penny calls reader darling that it.

This is also part one of a two-part set. I wanted to add a little more comfort but I loved the natural end to this without it. It is not written yet so I don’t know when it will be posted but I will link it here. when it is posted.

There is going to be smut in part two (An Ode to Golden Ratio PJs) and while there are still gender natural pronouns reader is going to have female anatomy. I’ve never written smut before and female anatomy is what I know from personal experience.

WC: 2.8k

TW: Regular cm stuff and topics covered in season 2 episode 14 and 15, (DID, dilaudid, self harm, abduction), talk and description of self harm but no relapse, any others let me know I’ll add it no question.

Again pt. 2 here

----

Spencer Reid and you had been dating since the two of you were set up on a sorta blind date by your mutual best friend Penelope Garcia. While you couldn’t possibly know everything that Spencer went through you had some idea from being Penny’s friend for years. Two years strong with Spencer and you felt like you were starting to know him better than his team.

It was Super Bowl Sunday and you were out with the team. The game was over and Spencer, Anderson, yourself, and a few other FBI agents you had just met that night were sharing a table. You are draped on Spencer’s shoulder watching him getting quizzed by Anderson when JJ walks by, she ruffles his hair and takes a phone call outside. You fix the curls out of Spencer’s eyes and kiss his cheek when he answers the question just in the nick of time.

And then there’s a case. The team was called to Georgia and everything was going well, or as well as a murder investigation can go when one night Spencer missed his usual phone call with you. He would check-in, at least a minute, letting you know he was okay. So you weren’t surprised when Penelope knocked on your door.

“Hi, darling. Um, I am going to go to Georgia and I wanted to tell you because, well because you and Spence. Somethings wrong. You may want to sit down.”

“What happened to him?” you motion Penelope into your apartment and to your couch.

“Well, uh, boy wonder and JJ were sent to a witness’s house to question him. But the witness well he was the unsub.”

“What?” you look at your best friend. You didn’t want to believe what you were thinking.

“Tobias Hankel, uh the uh unsub took Spencer. I am going because he is highly skilled with computers. I promise you, I will bring him back to you.”

“Okay, so what do we know? Do we know if he’s okay?”

“The team has a video feed on him. They can’t track him, so I’m going to go. That’s my specialty darling, I’ll get him back to you. The image we have of him is okay right now. He’s tied to a chair and clearly wounded but he is okay. The unsub has multiple personalities and one of his personalities is feeding him and giving him water.”

“Okay sounds good. You leaving now then?”

“Right now. I knew you needed to know before I left though. I love you darling stay strong for your boy wonder.” Penelope popped up off the couch as you rose and gave you a tight squeeze before floating out the door.

“Yeah okay. Love you too.” you followed and closed yourself out of the world.

It was another three days. Three days of not hearing from Spencer, but at least you knew why. He was being held captive. Three days of knowing your boyfriend was in pain and danger, a murderer holding him and streaming his whereabouts to his friends. No word from Spencer. No word from Penny. No word from no one.

Until you woke up to Derek Morgan calling you at 2:30 in the morning.

“Hello? Derek is everything okay?”

“(y/n),” it was Spencer. His voice was rough and scratchy and maybe a couple of octaves lower.

“Holy shit Spencer. You’re okay.”

“I’m safe. And I’m going to be with you as soon as possible baby. I just have to go to the hospital first.”

“Spencer Walter Reid come home to me as soon as humanly possible. I just need you.”

“We’re headed to the hospital now. It’s just bruising and a gash on my head.”

You heard the team behind him and just needed him. Safe in your arms, safe out of the field.

“Spence just come to my apartment when you get home and I can take care of you.” you hear Morgan wolf whistle from your words. “I’m glad he can make jokes right now, that helps me know you are fine.”

It was so early you tried to go back to sleep. But you couldn’t, finally getting out of your bed at five and making coffee. After trying to eat something you couldn’t stay still anymore you decided to do some chores. You were folding laundry and found a pajama set Spencer had left at your apartment, it was soft flannel and covered in little beakers. You noted the company on the tag and a hole in the knee showed how loved they were. You went to the store and got his favorite peppermint tea and snacks, making sure to make it feel somewhat homely for him, and finally returned home where you sat on your couch sewing up the knee waiting for him to come home to you.

It’s past 8 pm, you have the pajamas folded beside you and a movie playing on your tv when you hear movement on the other side of your door. The sound of a key and the doorknob moving pulls for your attention when Spencer walks into your apartment.

“Charming Boy, what are you doing?” you grab his bags since he was clearly in pain. “Where’s Derek?”

“He dropped me off?”

You immediately noticed that Spencer had downplayed his injuries. A black eye was forming on his sharp cheekbone and you looked to his hairline where there was medical tape assuming that was the gash he had mentioned on the phone and his wrists were red from the restraints Penelope mentioned. But he hadn’t let go of his side since he entered your apartment and it just elevated your terror when he yelped from you taking his bag. What in the world happened to him. “Spencer why didn’t you tell me?” you lowered the bags to the ground and took his free hand and cheek in your hand, trying to get him to look at you.

“I was taken and beaten up for days but I’m good. I’m with you.” he kissed you but it didn’t feel like the boy that left you a week ago.

You pulled back from the kiss and looked at him. His eyes were distant and avoided yours looking to his messenger bag on the floor. You kiss him on the nose and he plays along crinkling his nose but his eyes don’t move. He is still dazed and out of it when you pick up his bag and drag him to your room.

Spencer didn’t like therapy, after the L.D.S.K about a year ago you asked him if he wanted to talk to someone outside of the FBI. “ I know all the tricks, I can’t learn anything new from them.” and while you knew it was an unhealthy view you were not going to force him to do anything he didn’t want to do.

“Hey, Charming can you look at me?”

You had brought him to the side of the bed he would sleep on when he stayed the night and he was staring out the window with his messenger bag on his lap and was holding on to it like it was the only connection to the world. He looks up at you standing in front of him. But his gaze quickly moved to the window and moon and sky again. “I’ll be right back.”

You grab his pajama set from the couch, a couple of glasses of water and a first aid kit then return to him, he hadn’t moved. After setting the items on the bed and the water on your bedside table you sit by him. You brush away stray hairs off his forehead and place a kiss on his hair. He smells like chemicals and raw fish.

The Spencer scent of his shampoo and matching body wash that reminded you of Christmas and the spilled coffee lingering on his sweaters was overpowered. Gone. You could spend days wrapped up the cardigans he left behind but right now he was nowhere near that version, in a shirt that was clearly Derek’s as it fell off his collar bones.

“Hey Spence, do you want to take a shower?

“Do you want me to?”

“You don’t have to if you don’t want to, it’s just, you’ve been held by an unsub for three days,”

“Two days, 13 hours.”

“Okay, so about three days. Charming wouldn’t it make you feel better?”

“I can if you want me to.”

The short answers made you very uncomfortable. The words and avoidance of a shower were very non- Spencer, you wanted his rambling back. You wanted the boy that left you a week ago, but he wasn’t coming back, so you just wanted him to feel a little bit better. Safe.

“Spencer, can you tell me where your head is at right now?”

“My head is in the chair I was strapped to for 61 hours.”

“Can I ask you to elaborate on that Spencer?” you didn’t want to push him but no one had told you what happened to him during those days and you wanted to know everything after he showed up worse for wear to you. “Did they touch the spots that are off-limits Spence?”

Spencer Reid was the most beautiful, handsome, and attractive person you had ever met. After the one time you hung out with the team, it was a no-brainer for Penelope that she needed to set the two of you up. And now years of knowing him and getting to know him differently than his team the two of you were comfortable together. And you quickly learned things before the team. You had planned to go with Spencer to see his mom when he was given vacation time, but you weren’t given time off; you left your retail job a month later to pursue your dreams. And like his mom before the Fisher King case, the team didn’t know about his ‘off-limits spots’ and this spaced-out man sitting before you. You knew they definitely didn’t know about his off-limits spots because you learned about them when you were making out one night and untucked his shirt. His ribs, his stomach, and wrist were the hardest for him when unsubs taunted him. The restraints, the groping, the beatings. They were also the places he put all his frustration out when his anxieties were out of control. But it had been two years.

“Spencer, did you hear me?”

“Um well he, Tobias took his belt around my arm, a make-shift tourniquet, and drugged me. He hit me in the head.” he gestured to his forehead. “And when they found me, the team, one of his personalities had a knife to my wrists.”

“Oh, Charming. Can I see?” he nods and you take his hand and unbutton the cuff of his sleeve, and there it is. A clear bandage was tight to the skin covering a dozen of cuts next to light scars from Spencer’s own hand. You couldn’t help but think two years down the drain even though the marks weren’t from Spencer, they sure looked like it. “Okay, bathroom Charming boy.”

The two of you walked to the bathroom and while Spencer sat on the closed toilet lid you ran the bath. Going back to your room you grabbed the first aid kit and his pajamas.

“Do you need anything, want anything to eat or drink?”

“Do you have peppermint tea?”

“I got some for your visit, I can make you some while you relax. Anything else?”

“My shampoo and conditioner are in my go-bag. Not that I don’t like the scent of your stuff I just want mine.”

“You don’t have to explain yourself, honey. Okay let me get those for you and then I can take your bandage off and we can clean it up.”

As you walk back into the bedroom Spencer yells “Actually it is better to cover wounds to help them heal properly.”

“I know Charming but I want to clean it and switch it to a new bandage. Better padding you know you were in a hospital and a plane with that one. Whoa,” Spencer was in the tub already and you were shocked to see him naked. A big bruise was wrapping around his rib cage. You had never seen your boyfriend in less than a button-up with the top three or four buttons undone. “Sorry, um I’ll go make something to eat and boil water.” you go to close the door.

“(y/n), wait.” his eyes were finally starting to come back in focus, “ Weren’t you going to help with this,” he places his arm on the lip of the tub.

“Sweetie, you’re, you are,” you are trying to look at his face and not the wounds or his collar bones or his chest or his below the water.

“Oh,” and just like that, his eyes unfocused.

“No Charming, it’s just, we’ve never been shirtless in front of each other.” you go to sit by the tub on the floor of your bathroom, grabbing his hand still limp on the lip of the tub. “Are you okay with this?”

“Yes, I’m okay, just can you not look at me like I’m different.” he looks at the arm and your hand holding it. “Just because my arm looks like this again.”

“Spencer, I didn’t look at you differently when you told me originally, I’m not going to look at you differently now. One sec,” you scoot on the tile and grab the first aid kit off the floor in the doorway where you dropped it. “Are you okay if I clean it and change the bandage?”

“Um, yeah, yeah you can, thank you.”

You grab his hand and put the kit in your lap. Grabbing an alcohol pad and running on the edge, and slowly but surely you get the bandage off his arm. You stand and get a washcloth off the shelf above the toilet and wet it with cool water.

By the time you finish bandaging his arm again the water Spencer was sitting in had gone cold and he is shivering.

“Can you make tea now and, um,” he looks down at his arm covered in new beige badges. Boring, but no one could see it anymore.

“Yes of course I can, um, I left a pair of pj’s on the bed you left them here.”

“Thank you.” he looked so small and scared in the tub.

You left thinking he was just bashful because he was in the tub and went and started a teapot. As you’re heating up a pot of water for mac and cheese you hear him padding into the kitchen.

“Do you feel a little better?”

“Definitely.” he sat at your kitchen table and you walked over to him. “Thank you for fixing my pajamas (y/n), I’m glad you had them. I thought I lost them, left them in a hotel on a case.”

“Yeah they were here, I can fix other clothes if you want.” you card your hands through his damp hair and twist his front fringe around your fingers.

“I would like that, thank you.” he closes his eyes as you comb through his hair and hold the back of his head. “Um, can we just have peanut butter and jelly, I just want to snuggle with you and I can’t wait for the water to boil.”

“That sounds perfect, do you still want tea?”

“Yes please.”

You kiss the top of his head, his hair finally smelling like Spencer. Your home. And as you let go you don’t feel that sinking feeling you usually do when walking away from Spencer. He joins you at the counter and pulls out two knives. You grab the bread slices and the two of you make sandwiches. When the kettle shouts you grab two cups and tea bags from the box and pour out water. Spencer grabs the plate with the sandwiches and follows you to your bedroom.

Once there you set the cups down and grab your phone and turn on some quiet music. When you turn around Spencer is already under the blankets and honest to god nibbling on his sandwich. You go to your closet to get your own pajama set, granted not as cute as your boyfriends, and join him.

“How are you feeling?” Spencer asks.

“I am so happy that you are here. Can I kiss your silly face?”

“Please do.”

You launch at him. Your flannel-clad legs wrap around Spencer’s hips. His hands go to your hair as his tongue starts to brush your lower lip and you open your mouth to accept his tongue. Pulling away from his mouth, his beautiful, talented, and oh so addictive mouth, you look to him as long lashes flutter open his big brown eyes you’re hit by a train.

“Move in with me?”

———

Update (May 2, 2021)

Part two here it is nsfw

[freshstartbaby]

Un

🎧 Body - Syd

I watched my house, cardbord on the ground, like me, leg crossed. White walls, a little smell of vinegar. Thats what I used to finally clean up everything.

Why do I feel like shit ? I mean one part of me cant wait to be in my new place. But the other ? I really feel like I kind of failed here. I got a job, two to be exact, I can provide for myself. I got few friends and thats it. I was wondering if my mum will ever know if I left the town. Maaaan I got to stop overthinking.

It was 8pm and I was waiting for Theo's call. Thanks to god he told me he will help me wih the moving. His help was so precious. Like always. My phone rang with « Theo 🤍 » on my screen . I picked up

« Sup mister T » I said softly « Hi Rob, you good ? » he answered « I am actually, and you ? » « Good. So you really goin to leave me, you know you can still change your mind » « No way, but you know you will still be in my mind » « And in your heart. Who do you think you are ? » he started to joke « Man where are you ? » I said rolling my eyes with a smile on face « There is a litlle bit of traffic. I be there in 10 minutes. But I think the man who will help us is already there. I fowarded him your number. Did he call ? »

I checked my phone, no missed call

« Nah he didn't » « Ok, get ready I be there soon » « Thank tou Theo » « Everything for you » he hang up

I shook my head slowley left to right. He was so kind to me. He can't be real. Me and Theo knew ourself since 8 years now. He was there to help and provide when no one could. He always was very protective and he is actually the one who gave me my first job: dancer in a club. It wasn't my goal job but I could dance and it will help me paying my bills. Few years later he also refered me in company to work as a personnal assistant. I managed myself to then become a communication assistant. When you look clother, without him, I probably will end up as a cracked or worse.

When we met I was 16 and he was 22. It was a very protective relationship. But the older we get, the akward it became. I mean physically he turned to a man as i turned to a young women. And even if he always shows me mad respect, the way he was watching and talking to me changed. Not in a bad way, but I could feel there was more. I aint gon lie, he is good looking, got money and got pure heart. But i couldnt wiling to lost him if we turned into a relationship. He was one of few people around me. Aint ready to loose one of them.

When I told him that I decided to move in LA, maaaan, he wasn't down for it. But as always, he helped me. He got fews relations so we find a cute flat quickly than I thought. The place was smooth and warm. We flew to LA to visit it, and i actually loved it. So now here I am waiting for a friend of his to move my stuff to LA. Let me get it straight. I aint no baby. I can take care of myself. But when it comes to Theo, he always wants to help. And I aint gonna lie, it feel good to be take care of.

The ring belled, I stood up to open the door. He looked at me, I looked at him.

« Can I help you ? » rising an eyebrow acting like I didn't know him « Stop playing » he said moving in my place « Hi » I said to the man following Theo « Robyn this is Eric, Eric this The New York leaver »

I rolled my eyes and shook my head slowly. Eric and Theo helped me to put my stuff in the truck. It was quickly made thanks to them. Also even if I hadnt much things I droped a lot. Eric told me that they will arrive the next monday in my new place. I thanked him as he left when I felt someone behind me. I turned around found Theo on his phone.

« First of all you didn't say hi »

I pulled him softly in a hug. His hands wrapped my shoulder as he kissed my cheek softly

« Then tell me where do I drop you ? » he said « Alex's place » « Lets go »

He put my suitcase in his trunck and we headed to Alexendra's place. I sold my car few weeks before so he proposed me to drop me where I needed yesterday.

Alexandra is one of my best friend. She's like a sister to be honest. We know each other for like forever and she always be down for me. Im stayin at her place tonight so I can catch my flight tommorow.

The road was silent but confortable. Theo and I like to be quiet sometines. We're the type of people who arent afraid of silence. As we arrived to Alexendra's place we stayed a little in the car.

« You need help with the suit case ? » « Na Im good, but thank you. Thank you for everything. It means a lot» I look at him « Stop saying this like its a goodbye » « Im not » « You better »

We pulled into a thight hug «You know I'm always be around and if you need to come back my door is open» « I hope it will be fine dont say that »

He look at me kiss my cheek and said

« Take care » « You too Theo »

I got off the car, took my suitcase and watched him leave. As we disapear on the corner I called Alex.

« Yes baby » « Im here, remind me your code » « You still dont remember it, you do it on purpose » « Guuuurl what is it ?» « 7110 » « Thank youuuuuu »

I taped the code and got to her place

« Sup baby » « Wassup baby, how you doin ?» « Good and you ? » « Everything is alright, I mean my best friend is leaving in an another town but Im good » « Guuuurl, it is for the better » « I know that, Im just getting emotional » « Dont do that » « Im trying, I swear ! How did you came ? You took a uber ? » « Nah, Theo droped me »

She set down on her large cozy couch eying me with a small smile

« What ? » I asked « Noooothing ! » she tapped the place next to her so I can take place « You just goin to sit down and tell me what's popin between you and this white daddy, finally» she said swith a smirk « Nothing is popin, I already told you that » i said sitting next to her « But you got to admit he is good lookin » « I never said he isnt » « Maybe a little bit skinny but he is still handsome » « He is. » « So he never try to own that » she said pointing at myself « And dont try to tell me no, I saw him plenty time trying to get you. » « Alex, it is not goin to hape- « «  Whyyyyyyyy » « Because I dont want to » I said laughin « GURL IS YOU GAY ?» « Oh my god. Alexendra. » «  No because if you are it is ok. But you need to tell me, so I can introduce him to friend of mine. Its such a waste » « Whatever » I said looking at her smiling

This girl is so crazy. Full of good vibe. Always pushing me to my best. She is fam yall. Our phones started buzzing at the same time. It was a whatsap phone call from our conversation « Mexico 🥵 ».

With some friends we decided to go on a trip to Mexico. For the big part, I knew them from school or club. As we grew older all of us took different ways but still got mad love for eachother. This week trip was the way to link up. I didnt knew some people like David, Florian and Veronica but everything went well during the organisation so I wasnt « afraid » that they were annoying.

The trip is next Monday so we schedule this video chat to make a last check. With all the stuff with my moving I almost forget about this call. Alex and I were together so I decided not to answer from my phone and step clother to her so we can both be on her screen

« Hi » « Wassup beauties » Alexander says

We all said hi to each other and waited to see if someone was missing.

« Who is missing » I asked « Flo is not here » Betty said « Damn this sleeping guy, let me text him » Alexander answered

As he decided to text him, a new window poped in our screen revealing a big white man shirtless, it seems like he was in his bed.

« My bad, sorry for my lateness, wassup guys » he said in a low voice

I looked at the screen, then at Alex, then the screen again and falled into the catch moving my hand to show to Alex that this man was foooine

We giggle few seconds before getting back to our serious faces.

« Florian that is it ? » Alex asked « Yup » « Time is money you owe us all a drink when we get to the mexico » « Maaaan dont play me like that, I was taking a nap, gym killed me today» he said

Of course he was goin to the gym, look at this chest. I tried to fix my self when we all talked for like an hour about last informations, who will arrive when, who shares room, what type of activites we wanted to do. I cant wait for this trip to be honest. I dont travel that much. I could release the stress from my moving, my new job and the new town I will be living in.

« Rob you still in New York ?» Michael asked « Yeees, my fligt is tomorrow » « Where you goin ? » Betty asked « Moving to LA » I said softly « LA GANG MY MAN ! » Florian shouted « Thats great, really big move » Alexander said « Finger crossed » Veronica « Dont worry, as wherever it will be ok if you work hard enough » Florian said « Oh dont worry she is a hard worker » Alex said miming a blow job

I snaped her head as everyone shared an hard laugh. Few minutes later we hang up. I went to the bathroom, washed myself, my tooth and changed myself in something more confortable. I went back to the living room and find Alexandra on the phone. By the way she was smiling and laughing I could tell it was Alexander. Yeah. This gurl find a boyfriend with the same name. That's kind of cute but it's also so corny. She hanged up, stood uo and went to the kitchen

« Sooooo » « What do you want again ? » i said a smirk in my face « I was wondering » she looked at me with a vicious smile « What is it Alex ? » « Are you down for some dick in Mexico » « You are something else you know that » « Im just asking ! There will be latino guys, foreigner and gurl this man Florian, he is free like the wind » «How do you know that ? » « I asked Alexander » « Mmmmh » « Mmmmh ? Gurl when is the lastime you had a man making you feel right ? I aint talking about relationship because that is another level and I know you trying to put yourself first since...» « Yea no. I'm not ready but let me think » « The fact that you have to think is not ok, you know that if the sexual frustration is not evacueted it can damaged you » « I got toys dont worry » I said putting my finger in a peace sign while im leaving the kitchen

I went to her guest bedroom, sitted on the bed and put my durag on. After sliding under the sheets I did my breath exercise so I could fall asleep faster but I couldn't. It was these exercises or sleeping pills. But I try to use them less and less since few month. They knocked me hard to hard man. After 30 minutes of try, I took my phone and opened Instagram. I scrolled my screen without being focused at all, laugh at fews memes and double tap some post. I tought about what Alex told me. It's true. It been a while since I havent give a man his chance. It didn't went well the last time. Ok here we go overthinking. I shook my hand thinking of how dumb I was when I tought about Florian. He was fine its true but you know men are trash. At least men I have a crush on 😭. I tapped « florian » in the research bar to see if I could find him. I didn't. Im defenatly not a FBI member. I will ask to Alex tomorrow, or not, it's not a good idea.

——-

I was hugging Alexandra thighly at the airport. The voice called the passagers of my flight to get ready.

« I'm goin to miss you crazy ass » I whispered « I'm goin to miss you more Robyn, but stop being weak before I start crying » « Come on aint nobody goin to cry » I push her shoulder « we're tough girls remember ? » « Yea but I wrote you a letter » she gave me a letter as I look at her ready to make fun of her « You wrote me a letter, you must be in love with me » « Of course I am, yo you're my friend soulmate » « Ok you gon make me cry now » « Go get your flight »

I tried to open the letter when she took my hand

« The fuck is you doin, you have to read it in your flight, or when you arrive to your new place but not now » « Okaaaaaaay mrs emotional »

I kissed her cheek and grabed my suit case before leaving

« See you in Tulum baby ! »

I put a peace sign above my head a went take my flight.

As I settled in my seat, I leaned my head back to the couch. Here we go baby. You can do this. You got this. It's goin to be fine. I was motivated myself when my phone buzzed. I watched my phone screen and see that Theo sent me a vocal. I put my AirPods on tap on my screen to listen his whatsap vocal message.

James. Theo James. : « You're in the plane ? »

I send him a quick answer

Robyn ✨: Yup 🛫

James. Theo James. : Ok

I watched the screen as I saw « James. Theo James is writing » when a big as message droped. Oh my god. He is goin to make me cry. Or worse. I rubbed my forehead before start reading.

James. Theo James. :

« Robyn. My baby. I know your flight is getting ready to take off. So I'm writing this to you so you can be ready for this new page.

Im goin to tell you this, and ear me out when I say: You got this.

You're smart, kind, open minded,fierce, talented, reliable, honest and a fighter. I know life ain't did good to you lately, and it's destroying me to see you leave but baby it's a fresh start. Leave all the madness, the pain and the self doubt where you at because LA is goin to be fire baby. No more drama, no more pathetic boyfriend, no more struggling. Put yourself above everything, because you deserve it. Keep your mental healthy. Communicate more, talk free and never be afraid to make people to ear your voice.

As I always say to you, even if the blood don't link us, you mean the world to me. Whenever you need anything blow my phone. I will always have an eye on you even if I know you are and you are becoming a boss a bitch woman every single day.

I know you are goin to kill it.

Text me when you arrive to your new home

I will come visit you in few months

Theo 🤍 »

I closed my eyes, bitted my lips and hold my phone on my chest. Don't cry, don't cr- too late. Tears were all over my face as I try to mute myself. Even I tried to hide it, I was feeling shitty. And those words just gave me the feeling of being discovered. I don't know how it was possible. Even if Theo and I were closed I have difficulties to talk out when I'm not feeling myself. And with this message I knew that all this time he knew how I felt but give me my space.

LA be good to me please.

—-

🎧 1 pound - Brymo

The sunlight woke me this morning. I really need to buy curtains. I mean in the rest of the place it's not that important, but wake this way is so uncomfortable. I like the darkness in my bedroom you know ? And all this light, god chill out 🤣

I stood up and head ou to the bathroom and then to the kitchen. I watched the board where I wrote my to do list yesterday night. Yeaaaa i'm trying to be more disciplined woman. I mean organized but sometimes I get too lazy. Like if I invented the word lazy myself.

End the bathroom Shopping at the supermarket Look for a car End the suitcase Work out (you can do this)

I laugh at myself knowing that I will probably not doing the last one. I washed my dishes and turn on the speaker to get in a better mood. I clean a little some stuff since there was still some cardboard here and there. I find myself dancing in front the big mirror in one of the corridor when my phone rang. I didn't know the number so I turned of the music and clear my throat.

« Robyn Matthew, how can I help you » « Hi Robyn this is William. I am with Olivia, you're on speaker. How are you ? » « Hello Robyn »

Ow my new bosses.

« Oh hello to both of you, I'm great thank you to ask. How about you two ? » « We're good ourself thank you. Have you settled yet ? » « Mmh there is still few unopened cardboards but I'm good » « Good to ear that » « You will love LA » Olivia said « I hope so, how can I help you ? » « Well Robyn we were wondering, sorry to ask again but weren't you supposed to start today ?»

My eyes grew wide as my eyebrow start dancing. I wasn't supposed to start today hell no

« I don't think so, I mean I asked to the RH department to postponed my arrival since I have a trip planned » « Oh my baaaaaaaaaad » Olivia shooted « What is it » he asked to Olivia I think « I totally forgot to tell you, Cindy told me few weeks ago but it disappeared from my mind »

My heart stoped racing fast when I told them

« You scared me ! » « I'm so sorry Robyn, William I'm sorry too » « Oh it's ok, you owe us a coffe when she arrives » « Deal » she said laughing « You better note that, or you will forget it too » « Very funny » « Anyway sorry to have bothered you Robyn » William said « It's fine » « Where are you going ? » Olivia asked « Sorry ? » « You said you are goin on a trip, where is it ? »

I twisted my face. How is that suppposed to concern them ? Robyn stay open, be nice, they're just trying to be nice.

« Tulum » « Oh Mexico, well lucky you » « Oh my god, I wish I could have holidays to a place like this » « Anyway Robyn, enjoy you're trip and come back to us resourced. You can't wait to work with you » « Thank you, see you soon » « Bye »

I hang up, a weird feeling in my guts. I mean they were nice. But I'm not really use to have this kind of conversation with my bosses. I tought that they were a good duo both of them. I find myself a little anxious about having two bosses but it's goin to be fine.

Im goin to tell you this, and ear me out when I say: You got this.

I got this. I wanted to turn back on the music. So I scrolled my screen when I saw an Instagram notification.

@bignasty wants to follow you

My face twisted again. Big nasty ? What the hell is that. I'm sure this is a porn count, or a pervet who will try to slide in my Dm. So many weird people on social medias. Thanks god the private button exists so I can control borders 😂 I clicked on it when I saw his face.

Wow.

I took few step back to my couch as my hand was on my chest. Jesus Christ. I found myself put my hand on my mouth so I don't scream and laugh akwardly. God. It was Florian. I mean I think. No no no it was him. How can you forget a face like this. I hold my breath as scrolled down his feed. This man was... l have no word. I rubbed my eyes trying to get back to earth, with a big dumb smile on my face when my phone rang

Xandra 💍 is calling

I picked up and put her on the speaker. I said hi to her in a low voice, I was feeling like I'm out of breath

« GUUUUUUUURL » she screamed « Wassup » « Did Florian asked you on Ig ? » « He did. » « GIRRRL DID YOU SAW THESE PICTURES ?!!!! » « Alexandra, i was checking him when you called » « GURRRRRRL IF YOU DONT EAT HIM ON THIS TRIP I'M KILLING YOU »

I start rubbing my eye again. He was something else. God. Why do I feel this. Then I found myself playing with my finger, where my engagement ring used to be.

It gave me a quick reminder.

« Ok he is super hot, but don't count on me for that » « You're such a child when you act like that. You know what, I'm sure you pantie is already soaking looking at his pic, so just wait. When he is goin in front of you there will be no « don't count on me for that » » « shut up » « Have you end your suite case ? » « Not yet, I think it will be handle this evening» « Ok look listen to me wisely. I don't know what you choose but switch it all up with sexiest stuff » « I'm tired of you »

We stayed on the phone for like an hour. You know how it is when besties are on the phone. All the day she kept teasing me with Florian but I didn't give attention. But I wanted to make her laugh a little so I teased her with a screen and a meme

She hit me back with a message 

« gurl this is too much, you really goin to miss this chance »

What chance ? He just followed me on Instagram. I didn't even accept him yet. He must have a girlfriend, or be a fuck boy. Maybe is he gay. Ok Robyn overthinking AGAIN. It's goin to be cute holidays. I don't want to mess this up.

—— 3836 words

Wassup guys ?

How do you feel about this beginning ?

Is everything understable ? I'm French so you know you girl is struggling a little 🙈

Do not hesitate to give me feedbacks, react, and all that stuff

Next step, Tulum baby 🥵

Take care

NEXT PART

[below-average-fangirl]

A Sky Full of Stars

Fandom: Pete’s Dragon

Pairing: Gavin Magary/ Mackenzie (OC)

Warnings: Smut, Fluff

Summary: Gavin reconnects with an old flame

Fan Fiction Masterlist

Link to story on AO3

Fastening the laces on her boots Mackenzie tried to figure out if tonight counted as a first date or if it was just her and Gavin picking up where they'd left off 15 years ago. The butterflies in her stomach certainly made it feel like a first date but then Gavin had always had that ability to make her knees feel weak. He only had to flash that boyish smile at her. Mac had anticipated the possibility that Gavin would ask her out and she’d prepared speech, which she had rehearsed countless times in her head that covered all the key points. That it wasn’t a good idea to retread old ground, it would ruin the friendship they’d built since her return to Millhaven and that she was still hurting from the separation with James. 

But when Gavin had come swaggering into the office as she looked over his business accounts, seemingly self-assured and asked if he could take her out on a date she found her body betraying her rational mind, her cheeks blushed and her heart beat faster as she said yes, she’d love to. Her heart had swelled at the relief which flickered across his face. Mac knew that an awful lot of Gavin's bravado was built on shaky ground that he was constantly looking for reassurance and validation.

A knock at the door startled Mac from her meditations. Jumping up from the bottom of the stairs she dove for the door in eagerness, resting her hand on the doorknob she took a calming breath as she opened the door and greeted Gavin. The soft glow of the hallway light cast across his face framing him beautifully. “Hey.” She breathed, caught a little off guard.

“Hey.” He smiled. “You ready?”

“Er yeah just give me one sec let me just say goodnight to Jessica.”

“Sure.” Gavin nodded.

Turning to head to the living room Mac rolled her eyes and chastised herself. Get a grip, she thought, you should be used to the sight of his face.

Mac made her way over to Jessica who was sitting on the floor by the coffee table playing chess with Casey, her babysitter. Mac leaned down and placed a soft kiss on Jessica’s forehead. 

“Okay sweetheart,” Mac cooed, “you can stay up till 9, no later alright.”

“Yes, mom.” Jessica’s eyes remained fixed on the board trying to work out her next move

“Casey if there are any issues just call Grace and feel free to help yourself to anything in the fridge.”

“Thanks, Mrs. Stephens.” Mac had learned not to let the use of her married name cut her anymore.

“See you in the morning,” Mac said as she gave Jessica another kiss before whispering. “Knight to...” But Jessica cut her off.

“Mom no, that’s cheating, let me figure it out.”

Mac stood up straight, hands up in mock surrender. “Okay, okay just wanted to help.” She said as he backed out of the living room laughing quietly to herself. 

“Everything okay?” Gavin asked as Mac closed the door behind her and they made their way to his truck. 

“Yeah, Jessica found an old chessboard of mine so I’ve been teaching her, but we’re at the stage where I’m no longer allowed to help. Apparently.”

Gavin made his way over to the driver’s side. “Ah. Yeah, Nate is very much at that stage as well. Has been since she was about 5.”

Both climbed into the truck and Gavin turned the ignition. 

Gavin hadn’t told Mac where they were going, he simply advised her to wrap up warm. Making their way down the road they sat in silence for a while before Gavin pointed to the glove compartment. 

“Do me a favor and grab a tape out of there. Be nice to have some music.”

“Sure.” Mac thought nothing of it till she opened the compartment and saw there was only one tape in there, her mouth dropped when she recognized her handwriting on the case. Gavin was watching her from the corner of his eye. 

“Oh my God Gavin is this,” Mac snatched up the cassette, turning it over in her hands, her careful and clear script showing the song and artists and her artwork as a cover. “I can’t believe you kept this.”

“Of course I kept it.” He glanced at her smiling. “Most thoughtful gift I’ve ever had.”

Mac could feel tears prick in the corner of her eyes. Leaning across the cab she placed an arm across Gavin’s shoulders as she gave a peck on the cheek, his stubble rough but not unpleasant against her soft lips. They glanced nervously at one another, the atmosphere in the cab becoming thick and heavy with anticipation. Sitting back in her seat, Mac opened the cassette box and put the tape in the deck. She smiled with glee when the soft sounds of Blackbird by The Beatles wafted from the speakers.

“You always had the best taste in music.”

Mac leaned back in the seat and smiled at Gavin. “I think I know where you're taking me.”

***

Gavin parked the truck and cut the engine so that the music would keep playing. Mac moved to open the door but Gavin laid a hand on her shoulder. “Just wait a sec, let me get everything sorted.”

Mac nodded and Gavin hopped out. Mac felt the truck move slightly as he lowered the tailgate as he stepped into the back. Looking through the window she watched as Gavin moved the plastic covering revealing blankets, cushions, and a picnic basket and set about rearranging everything. When he was done he looked through the window at Mac, smiling and beckoning for her to come out. Mac turned up the volume on the music and stepped out of the truck.

Gavin held his hands out to Mac who took hold of them for support as she put one foot onto the wheel and pushed herself up, swinging her other leg over the side of the truck and stepped into the flatbed. She stood staring out across the view before her, the view of the valley with Millhaven off in the distance and the forest stretching far and wide. The night air littered with bright stars. For the time in a long time, she felt like she was home. Mac cupped her hands together, bringing them to her mouth blowing hot air into them to warm them.

“You know the first time we did this it was summer.”

Gavin gestured for her to sit down. “Don’t worry I’ll keep you warm.” He said as he knelt to grab something from the picnic basket. “Hot chocolate.” He grinned, shaking the flask as he picked up two mugs.

Handing the mugs to Mac he sat down beside her, pulling a blanket over them before opening the flask. He poured them each a small portion of hot cocoa before closing the flask and laying it beside him as he took a mug from Mac, he held it out to toast. “To second chances?”

They clinked mugs. “Second chances.”, Mac whispered before taking a small sip, watching Gavin. She brushed her hair away from her face, “I remember for our other first here we had champagne.”

Gavin looked at her over his mug as he drank, gathering his thoughts. “Do you remember that first with fondness?”

Mac reached out a hand, caressing his cheek with her palm, “Of course I do.”  

Gavin looked away, somewhat embarrassed gathering his feelings before he looked at her again. “It’s just, you know it wasn’t my finest hour our break-up and I was worried that might have tarnished any memory you had of me.” 

Mac dropped her hand. “I can’t lie. It did for a little while, you accusing me like that in front of all my friends. But as time went on,” she shrugged. “I realized I hadn’t put a lot of work into us when I was at college. I let you carry that load a little too much.” 

“So you forgive me?”

Mac smiled warmly at him and leaned forward to give a chaste kiss on the lips. “Yes.” She said as she pulled apart, his hazel eyes seemed to ignite with a desire she hadn’t seen nor felt in a long time. 

Finishing her cocoa Mac placed her mug on top of the roof of the cabin before shuffling down to lie on her back to look up at the stars. Gavin drained his mug, placing it alongside hers before also moving to lie on his back beside her. Silence fell between them again, the sounds of the forest mingling with the music from her mixed tape.

“Any chance of spotting a shooting star do you think?” She asked as she looked over at Gavin he was watching her intently. 

“Possibly. Although it’s been a while since I did some stargazing.”

“I assume then you’re still hopeless with the constellations and their names.”

Gavin looked to the night sky, pointing to random clusters of stars. “Oh yeah, the erm, the skid bucket, and the onion.”

Giggling Mac turned on her side, sitting up one arm as she took hold of Gavin’s hand, drawing out the constellations. “You mean Cetus and Orion.” She looked down at him, her long auburn hair falling around her face, there’s eyes locked on one another as she let go of his hand. “Guess I wasn’t a very good teacher.”

Gavin moved to mirror her position, reaching out to brush her hair from her face, his palm resting against her cheek, his voice was low and husky when he spoke “No. I was just distracted by something else."

Mac's breath hitched, closing her eyes when Gavin lightly ran his thumb across her lips before his hand shifted to rest at the nape of her neck. His hot breath tickled her lips before he laid his mouth on hers. The sharpness of his stubble against her skin was in stark contrast to how soft and tender his kiss was as if he was asking for permission to deepen it. Mac's answer came in the form of her hand fisting his jacket, pulling him closer. It was all the invitation Gavin needed as he rolled her onto her back, conscious to straddle her hips to keep his weight off her. 

The feeling of Gavin on top of her caused Mac to moan into his mouth. It had been so long since she felt desired like this and if she could engage her rational mind, to tell herself why this was too much too fast she would have ignored it. Unzipping his jacket she pushed it from his shoulders and they broke apart, panting as he sat up to remove the item, while she worked on removing her own. Gavin’s mouth was on her again in an instance as his hand slipped under her shirt, she gasped at his cold touch against her warm skin.

“Sorry.”

“‘S okay,” Mac mumbled in pleasure. “Don’t stop. But the first time we did this it was also summer.” They smiled at one another, sharing the joke as the memory of that night shone brightly in their eyes. Gavin returned his lips to hers, his tongue sweeping into her mouth as his hand under her shirt drifted upwards. 

When he ran the pad of his thumb over the delicate lace of her bra, teasing her sensitive bud, Mac grabbed his thick lush hair, running her slender fingers through it. It felt so good to have him close to her, him touching her like this but she wanted more of him. Letting go of his hair she ran her hands down the length of his muscular and toned body, stopping when she reached his belt buckle. 

Taking the hint Gavin pulled his hand out from her shirt and sat up slightly as he worked on unbuttoning Mac’s pants. Without being told Mac lifted her hips to make it easier for him to pull down her pants and underwear and when he slid a finger into her folds, his thumb massaging her clit, Mac let out a soft groan at his touch. She knew it wouldn't take much to bring her to the edge, she honestly couldn't remember the last time she'd been touched like this, with care and love. 

"Gavin." She pleaded as she pushed his jeans off his hips. 

Not needing to be told twice Gavin removed his fingers from inside her and rested his weight on his arms, placing them either side of Mac's head, they looked intently into one another's eyes with Mac holding his length as she helped guide him into her. She was tight and wet and Gavin buried his face into her neck muffling his groans. 

Wrapping her arms around his neck, her mouth close to his ear Mac whispered. "It's been a while." She suddenly felt self-conscious. 

Lifting his head to look at her Gavin spoke quietly. “We don’t have to...”

But Mac covered his mouth with her hand, silencing him. “Just be gentle, okay.” 

He nodded, smiling kindly which made his eyes sparkle, and his cheeks dimple. Mac realized for the first time how much she’d missed him. Falling for him came so easily to her, he always was the most handsome man she’d ever known. 

Gavin shifted his weight slightly, so he could lean more on one side to free up a hand. Taking hold of Mac’s hand he kissed her fingers tenderly as he slowly rolled his hips back and forward. “Whatever you need.” He whispered, letting go of her hand so he could once mare slip his own underneath her shirt, his fingers dancing across her skin before he began palming her breasts.

Mac’s eyes rolled back in her head and she arched into him. “Fuck. Gavin.” She panted, she was suddenly desperate to touch him, to feel his skin against her fingers, reaching down she slipped her hands into his jeans, grabbing at his ass. Gavin let out a groan. 

“You always had the best bum of all the boys.” Mac smiled when soft chuckles shook Gavin’s body at her confession. Pressing her lips to his ear, her voice laced with desire as she spoke. “I used to love watching you play baseball, your ass in those tight, white trousers, bent over the plate, so pert. Mmm. Could just take a bite” She whispers, taking his lobe between her teeth.

Gavin hissed, his head resting against her shoulder. “Jesus Mac.” He panted as he increased his pace. “Fuck. Mac. You feel so good.” 

Moving his hand from her breast, sliding it down her torso he slipped his fingers between her legs and started massaging her clit, Mac let out a strangled cry. Smiling to himself Gavin covered her mouth with his, kissing her like he wanted to devour her, capturing her moans and mews as she reached the climax of her orgasm. His own soon followed and he collapsed on top of her, both panting heavily. Gavin enjoyed the feeling of being held in Mac’s arms as they calmed their breathing. 

Stroking his hair, Mac placed a kiss on his cheek, breathing in the scent of him, pine cones, and soap. Looking up at the night sky her vision slowly came back into focus as she watched the stars, she smiled as she saw a shooting star pass overhead, closing her eyes she made a wish. 

Mac gently nudged Gavin to rouse him. "Hey. You missed it."

"Certainly didn't sound like I missed it."

Mac burst into fits of laughter. "I mean a shooting star, you idiot." 

“Oh.” Gavin lifted himself and smiled down at Mac, slowly pulling himself out of her. “Nice to know I still have it.” He bragged, tucking himself back into his underwear, and redoing his jeans.

“God.” Mac cried out with mock exasperation as she pulled up her pants and underwear. “You’re such a bloke sometimes.”

“With a fine ass though.” Gavin picked up a blanket and as he laid down on his side next to Mac covering them both with it as he continued poking fun at Mac. “Have you been ogling me the whole time you’ve been back then.”

“Obviously,” Mac said grinning, turning to face him. “I hate seeing you go, but boy, do I love watching you leave.”

“Well, now I feel all self-conscious.” Gavin jokes. “Every time I’m around you from now on, all I will be thinking about is you checking out my ass. And what happens if you find another ass you like more.”

Giggling Mac pushed Gavin onto his back, kissing him to shut him up. “Yours has always been the ass for me.” She said when she broke the kiss.

“Promise?” Gavin asked smiling, as he slid an arm around Mac’s waist.

“Promise.” She whispered as he rested her head on his shoulder, making sure they were both covered with the blanket.

Gavin placed a kiss to Mac’s temple as she snuggled closer to him. As silence fell over them, for the first time they noticed the music was no longer playing, the only sound was the forest and their soft breathing. And as they lay there in one another's arms, happy to have found each other again, a second shooting star passed by overhead.

[takingcourage]

Jaime x MC Fluff Alphabet

Part 1 of 2

Pairing: Jaime x MC (Arden)

Word Count: 5,650

Note: July 8 marks the first anniversary of the Wishful Thinking finale. I’m still not over Jaime Lewis, and this seemed like an excellent opportunity to check in with him and Arden through a series of drabbles. Since I’ve already addressed some of these topics in previous fics, I’ve linked the relevant stories below as well.

I plan to release Part 2 within the next week. I hope you enjoy! : ) 

Activities - What do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them? 

Swatting away the sweat bee that was hovering around her neck, Arden trudged through the grassy acreage that lay between her and Jaime. They were still hours from the full heat of the day, but the air was muggy enough to drown in.

“You forgot your water bottle back up at the farmhouse,” she called once within earshot. 

Jaime dumped the shovelful of dirt onto the pile beside him and leaned a forearm on end of the handle. “Thanks.” He peered at her through one eye, the other blinking rapidly to dispel the sweat. 

“Next time, I’m bringing a bandana for you too.”

Taking a swig from the bottle, he pulled it back with a shake of his head. “My hair’s fine how it is.” 

“I’m not disputing that it’s fine, just that it’s impractical in this weather. Come to think of it,” she mused, shielding her eyes with her hand, “so is that shirt you’re wearing.” 

A sly smile crossed his lips as he squatted to set the bottle on the ground. “You sure you’re really here to help the people of Oak Hills, Arden?” 

She brushed the question aside with the wave of her hand. “I wouldn’t still be coming out here if I weren’t. But the day’s only getting hotter. Going shirtless would clearly be the most logical course of action.” 

“Uh-huh,” he drawled. “I’m onto you, Mrs. Lewis.” 

Squinting against the mounting sun, Arden cast an appreciative eye over his form. “And I’m looking forward to having you all to myself, Mr. Lewis.” 

Jaime sighed in feigned exasperation, but she didn’t miss the decisive wink before he returned to work. 

Beauty - What do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?

“Jinx.” 

A momentary sliver of green appeared between the calico’s eyelids. 

“Jinx,” she tried again, skimming a knuckle over the curve of the cat’s spine. “You know this isn’t your bed.”

Both eyes remained firmly shut. 

Jaime stretched an arm over Arden’s pillow to stroke the feline behind the ears. “She’s used to getting away with it until you go to sleep. You’ve thrown her off her whole routine coming to bed so early.”

"Well, she’s not getting by with it tonight. She’s just going to have to find somewhere else to sleep.” 

With a chuckle, he pulled the hand away and propped himself on his elbows. “Want me to move her for you?”

“I’ve got it.” Sliding both hands under the mass of fur, Arden transferred the cat to the foot of the bed. “There you go, princess. Sleep well.” 

Jaime had thrown back the blankets for her by the time she returned. “It’s nice to fall asleep with you again. And seeing you in these is definitely a perk.” She looked up in time to see his gesture toward her satin sleep set. 

“You mean the pajamas you bought me for my birthday? What a surprise,” she ribbed, scooting over toward the middle of the mattress. “Though they are super comfy.” 

“And they look amazing.” 

Lips curling at the tired, yet sincere compliment, she unlocked her phone and began scrolling through her personal emails.

“Seriously,” he continued. “I think I need you to wear them around the house all the time. Your hips look incredible.”

Arden looked up from the screen, “They’re just hips, Jaime.” At his dumbfounded expression, she shook her head and laughed. “There’s nothing special about them.”

“You don’t understand,” he countered, reverently stroking the arc from her knee to her waist. “They might be my favorite part of you; they’re absolutely gorgeous.” 

“And you’re an absolute flirt.” She bit her lip with a grin and leaned out of his reach to plug her phone onto the nightstand charger. The disappointment she heard as she moved away was visible in his eyes as well. 

“Not that I’m complaining,” she clarified as she snuggled back into the mattress beside him. “Besides, if this is the reception I get for coming to bed early, I might have to do it more often.” 

Comfort - How would they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack etc.? (See also In Stasis, Back to Bubbly, and Flat)

Jaime could hear the panic in her voice when he called to check in over lunch. His fiancée’s words were measured and controlled, but he’d known Arden too long to ignore the shakiness that came along with each inhale of breath. 

“It’ll get done,” she assured from the other end of the line. “We’ll make it work. Anyway, I’ll probably be home late tonight, but I can’t wait to see you.”

She begged off moments later, leaving Jaime with the smiling picture of her that popped up from his contacts. From the sound of things, she was a long way from the happy, carefree Arden she’d been when that photo had been taken. 

With less than a week before tapings began for The Ellen and Arden Show, she was more stressed than he’d ever seen her. She was getting by on only a handful of hours of sleep, and he couldn’t remember the last time he’d successfully convinced her to take a break from her work. 

Her strong work ethic was one of his favorite things about her, but she was approaching this phase of life with a bit more can-do attitude than he would have liked. That stubborn independent streak of hers was back in full force. If it weren’t for her insistence that he continue his normal work schedule, he’d be there with her now. 

Slipping the device back into his pocket, he surveyed the worksite and ticked off the tasks that remained. Edge sanding, screen sanding, staining... As he sorted through grits of sandpaper, his thoughts kept slipping back to Arden. He could easily have the first coat of stain done by 5:00. After that, he’d go to the studio and see what he could do to help.

Maybe it was time to remind her that she didn’t need to handle everything on her own. 

_____

She was busy when he strolled into the studio -- too busy to notice he’d arrived until he was standing across from her at one of the staff writing tables. “Hey!” she jolted, her reddened eyes trying to focus on his face. “Is everything okay?”

Jaime lifted a thick brow. From the mock scowl she gave in return, she’d taken his meaning. 

“I’m fine, Jaime. I just don’t know how we’re supposed to start filming in three days when our set still looks like that!” She pointed at the bare-bones stage on the other side of the room. “The electrician had a family emergency, and we still haven’t gotten the custom flooring that we ordered from the store downtown.” 

“Listen,” he urged, stretching out a hand to help her up from the chair. “When we head out of here tonight, I promise we’ll be leaving things in much better shape. But I need you to do two things for me first.” 

“What?” she inquired, her tone verging on apprehensive. 

“Let me hug you.”

In spite of her initial reluctance, she stepped willingly into his arms. “What’s the second?”

“Eat some dinner while I take stock of where you’re at.”

“But I don’t have time to--”

“There’s a bag of Chinese in your makeup room.” He dropped a kiss on her crown as her grip tightened around his waist. 

Dreams - How do they picture their future with their s/o?

“I think this is the first time I’ve seen you in makeup since we were, like, nine.” Arden took a step toward him and he dipped closer to hear the words she murmured next. “It’s kind of hot.” 

“What? There’s no way that’s true,” he countered, hoping that the makeup was enough to conceal the blush that was stealing across his face. Two months into married life, he still turned to putty every time she used that tone.

“Did Maggie even touch your hair? It looks the same as always.” 

“Just some hairspray.” 

Mumbling something about the unfairness of genetics, she sashayed over to the mic station for final adjustments. Within minutes, they were ready to begin. He joined her on the stage and waited for the lead cameraman to give them the signal. 

Beside him, Arden slipped easily into her on-air persona. “Looking for something to do over the long weekend? We’ve got a project that’s fun, easy, and good for the environment. It’s great to do by yourself, with friends, or even with your kids. Here to help demonstrate, we have a very special guest...” 

Jaime tried to look into the cameras as she completed the introduction, but it was difficult to drag his gaze away from her. Seeing her in her element like this -- getting to be a part of it -- was nothing short of amazing. 

“Thanks, Arden,” he took over, finally directing his attention toward the studio. I’m going to show you how to make a window box planter out of things you probably already have around the house...” the narration slipped from his tongue with the ease of practice. They’d been planning the segment for weeks, and he’d lost track of the number of rehearsals they’d put on in the garage. 

She followed the steps as he began the demonstration, and he caught her quiet giggle as she showed off the tools on her workspace. 

They’d worked on projects together dozens of times, yet this experience was something new. It was a true intersection of their interests: a sign of what the two of them could do when they pieced their talents together. And although it was his first appearance on The Ellen and Arden Show, he had a sneaking suspicion it wasn’t going to be his last. 

Equal - Are they the dominant one in the relationship, or rather passive? 

“What was the order you just tried?” Arden bellowed, popping her head out of the small coat closet. “3-1-5-7-8? Try 3-1-7-5-8 instead. I think the diagram shows that the third number is 5, not 7.”

With the flick of his wrist, Jaime tested the new series of numbers. Feeling the tension of Arden’s gaze, the thanked his lucky stars for the old rotary phone he’d found at Paula’s one summer. He’d never have guessed that his days of dialing fake numbers in the attic would come in so handy. 

As the dial returned to its original position, a mechanical click came from the door on the opposite side of the room. 

“C’mon! We’ve got to see what’s in the bathroom.” 

He’d just had a chance to complete a once-over of the tub before Arden burst in behind him, tossing open all the cupboards in her frenzy. In self preservation, he stepped back and flipped through the almost-familiar pages of the appointment book they’d started with half an hour before. Having noticed the prevalence of leaf-inspired last names, he started comparing entries against the trees he could see through the painted window. 

“We’re down to... 27 minutes,” she reminded after a brief pause to consult the digital readout above the main door. “If we fail this, that serial killer is coming for us with a hatchet. I refuse to die that way.” 

With an absent nod, he flicked through another few pages, grateful that she couldn’t see the way his eyes had rolled upward at her latest outburst. 

“Here, just let me do it,” she insisted, sliding behind him to trade places in the tiny room. “You go over to the sink and try to figure out the order on these medicine bottles.”

Sighing, he surrendered the book and made his way to the counter. Who decided escape rooms made for fun dates? This is awful. He craned his head out the door for a peek at the clock. Phew. Only 26 more minutes. 

Arden’s head spun over her shoulder. “This is fun, isn’t it? Why do you not sound like you’re enjoying it?”

Studying the labels on the bottles, he offered a distracted, “It’s fine. We can talk about it when we’re out of here.” 

She casually dropped the appointment book on the tank of the prop toilet, eyes locked on him as the cardboard hit porcelain. “This is no good if we’re not a team. What’s wrong?”

“It just feels like you’re coming on a little strong here,” he admitted, running a thumb along the lip of the glass bottle. “Like you’re trying to do all of this yourself because you think I can’t. I know I’m not as good at this stuff as you are, but I’d like to think we can work together.”

She sidled next to him again, but this time he had her entire focus. “My bossy side really comes out when I’m under pressure, doesn’t it?” 

Cocking his head to the side, he offered a reluctant nod. 

The next thing he knew, she’d hopped onto the tips of her toes for a kiss. “I’m sorry. I’ll try to do better.” 

“I know,” he assured, feeling a new sense of confidence as her lips met his. “Ready to kick butt for the last 24 minutes?”

“Let’s make it twenty,” she challenged, reaching for the address book. 

Fight - Would they be easy to forgive their s/o? How are they fighting? (See also OTP Prompt #25) 

Lukewarm coffee in hand, Arden extracted herself from the car and proceeded up the steps of the porch. As she’d come to expect on the days when Jaime worked from home, the front door was unlocked.

“I’ve got a surprise for you,” her husband greeted as she latched it behind her. He appeared a moment later, his thoughts matching the warmth of his face. 

In spite of the splitting force between her temples, Arden grinned in return. Jaime wasn’t a cure for headaches, but he had quite a talent for making her forget about them.

“Come with me.” He hoisted the heavy briefcase off her shoulder and caught her fingers with his other hand. 

“I’m coming, I’m coming.” she giggled, allowing him to take the lead as they wound through the entryway and into her office.

“Tada!” he announced, pulling her onto the carpeted floor.

Beside her desk sat the cabinet she’d purchased a couple of weeks before. It looked even better in person than it had online, and it filled the space between her desk and window perfectly. But even so, the pressure in her head returned as a tidal wave. As she stepped closer, it crashed over her in a torrent of hot tears and shallow breaths. 

“It was on the front porch when I came home for lunch, so I decided to put it together as a...” His words fell short as he glanced back at her. “Babe, what’s wrong?”

“I wanted to do it.” 

She knew the complaint sounded shallow and pathetic, but she’d been operating on a short fuse for the better part of the day and her patience had worn extraordinarily thin. 

“I had no idea,” he whispered, concern etched in his brow. 

“It’s such a stupid thing to be upset about, but I was looking forward to building it,” she admitted, plonking her travel mug on the desk in front of her.

“You’ve been working such late hours the past several weeks. I thought it would be nice for you to come home and have it done.” 

With his explanation, it was easy to see how he’d come to such a conclusion. “True,” she conceded. “But sometimes it’s nice to work on something that has an actual, finished product.” 

His full lips teased a smile before he opened them to speak. “If that’s what you’re looking for, I have a suggestion.” 

“Hmm?”

“You remember those brownies I was telling you about last week? The ones Kyle brought to the worksite?” 

“Yeah?”

“I got the recipe from him today, and we have all of the ingredients we need  in the cupboard. Maybe we could test them out together? We’d have a finished product.”

“And we’d get to eat the finished product,” she highlighted, eyes widening at the prospect. “I think that’s exactly what I need. You’re brilliant, Jaime.” 

Beaming, he tossed the hair out of his eyes. “Meet me in the kitchen once you’ve changed?”

“You’ve got a deal,” she agreed, already making a beeline for the upstairs bedroom. 

Gratitude - How grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their s/o is doing for them?

“I received an email from Tara Simpson yesterday afternoon, out of the blue,” Jaime began, breaking the post-breakfast Saturday lull. 

“Who?” Arden gave her coffee a vigorous stir until she was satisfied with the rich caramel color.  

“The Northbridge Parks and Recreation Director,” he clarified, pouring himself another mug. “She’s interested in getting my feedback about a trail project for Memorial Park. You wouldn’t know anything about that, would you?” 

Cup already on its way to her mouth, Arden took an extra-long drink to buy herself some time. Her eyes narrowed as she leaned a hip against the countertop. “She's probably heard that youv’e been helping clean the mountain trails outside the city.” 

Jaime’s eyebrow dipped with suspicion. “That park is owned by the state. It’s outside of her jurisdiction.” 

“Eh, she must have heard people talk about it.” With a shrug, she pulled open the dishwasher and slotted her spoon into the plastic basket. ”There are a lot of people who love what you did out there.”

Brooding over his still-steaming mug, he watched her behavior curiously. “I know you had something to do with this, even if you won’t admit it.”

Arden knew her husband was smart and capable, but sometimes she managed to forget just how clever he was in addition to everything else. She wasn’t sure how he’d found out about her involvement, but denying it further wasn’t any use. 

“I might brag about your work from time to time. If people hear that bragging and decide to contact you for services...” her voice rose as she let the implication linger. 

“Then thank you for being my cheerleader, even when I don’t know it.” 

“You’re welcome.” With an impulsive sigh, she returned attention to her mug. Hopefully his cleverness wouldn’t extend to finding out about the hints she’d been dropping in the governor’s ear during the last soirée they’d attended together. She never meant to meddle, but he was the perfect solution to so many of the community’s needs. She couldn’t help wanting to hype him up as much as possible. 

“You’re looking pretty shifty over there. Am I about to get a call from the mayor too?”

Arden nearly choked on the sip she’d just poured into her mouth. “Something like that,” was the only reply she could eke out. 

Honesty - Do they have secrets they hide from their s/o? Or do they share everything?

Basket of clothes perched on her hip, Arden stared after her husband’s retreating figure as he passed by the laundry room. Jaime was acting suspicious. 

He’d fallen into many of the same patterns he had at Christmastime: trying to keep his distance when they were both home at the same time, working for hours inside the freezing garage instead of coming inside to use the table, having sneaky conversations with Opie when he didn’t think she was within range to hear...

He was trying to plan a surprise again. She just knew it. 

Not knowing anything else was starting to drive her wild. 

Just like Christmas, she was certain to overhear details sooner or later, but she wasn’t sure she had the patience for happenstance. Readjusting her hold on the basket, she followed him up the stairs to their bedroom. 

“So...” she drew out in an inviting tone as she dumped the warm clothes on their bed. “Our anniversary is only a month away. Have you thought at all about how you want to celebrate?”

He took a step toward the bed and snatched the collar of a T-shirt to begin folding. “I’ve got a few ideas, but nothing solid.” Technically, that’s true. 

“Technically?” Arden asked, scrutinizing every movement as he tucked in the sleeves and set the folded square on the mattress.

Don’t think about it. Nope! I’m thinking about...fire engines. And walruses. Totally random things. 

She was right! His thoughts were only this evasive if there was something he was trying to hide. Arden got his attention by tossing a pair of socks at his shoulder. “Are you trying to keep something from me?”

“No...” he attempted feebly, returning the sock roll to the small pile she’d started. 

“You’re such an awful liar, Jaime. Even before my powers, you were never any good at getting things past me.”

“I’m not lying, but I’m not going to tell you everything right now either. You’ll find out eventually.” With that, he kissed her cheek and vacated the room before she could overhear anything else. 

A little put out by his abrupt manner, she couldn’t resist asking, “What happened to being an open book?” 

“I’m not keeping you from reading it,” he called back from the stairway. “I’m just making sure you do it in the right order to avoid spoilers!”

She turned back to the laundry with a grumble. It looked like she’d have to wait for happenstance after all. 

Inspiration - Did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? Like trying out new things or helped them overcome personal problems?

“...then I’d like to get some ajuga for this big patch over here. I’ll get plenty so we have it for...”

Jaime’s words were interrupted as she caught the motion of her father’s front door swinging open. “Hey, dad!” she waved through the fence. Harry ambled to the near side of the porch to survey their work in the flowerbeds. 

“Hi, pumpkin. Your yard sure is looking good.”

“We’re coming for yours next weekend,” Jaime promised with a smile. “I was just telling Arden about what I’m planning to use for ground cover by the stairs. How’s your morning going?”

“Can’t complain. But my remote died and the channel is stuck on the news. Do you happen to have any spare AAA batteries? It’s almost 11:00, and I wanted to watch that new show on the History channel.”

He’s getting a whole crate of batteries for Christmas. 

Hearing Jaime’s thought, Arden had to avoid his face to hold in her laughter. 

“Lemme check,” Jaime volunteered, slipping off his gloves before making a quick trip into the house. Wasting no time upon his return, Arden watched from the flowerbed as Jaime vaulted himself over the fence and sprinted to pass the box to her father through the porch railing. Smothering her giggles under her gardening glove, she almost managed to go undetected. 

“Here you are, Harry. If you’ll excuse the sound behind me, I think your daughter is laughing at me.” 

“It’s better than laughing at me, I suppose. Thanks!” 

“Enjoy your show. See you for dinner!”

Returning to the fence, Jaime propped his arms on the pickets and stared down at her. “What’s so funny over there?”

“You’ve always given me so much crap for scaling the fence to come and see you that first day.” 

“You were right: it was a lot faster than going to the gate.” As if to demonstrate, he hitched his leg over the fence and dropped back into their yard.

“I’m glad we finally agree. Looks like I’ve rubbed off on you after all.” 

Approaching, he squatted down in front of her and brushed the errant strands of hair back under her bandana. “And where’d you pick up this sudden love of gardening?”

Though he posed the question in jest, his brown eyes were tender as well as teasing. 

“Touché.” Weed pulling had become unaccountably satisfying once it was their flowerbed she was tending. “I guess we’re both rubbing off on each other.” 

“Funny how that’s still inevitable after all this time.” 

Jealousy - Do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it?

Opie rolled to face him on the area rug, staring up at Jaime with soulful eyes. He gave the dog a good scratch behind the ears, increasing his speed as the animal’s tongue lolled out one side of his open mouth. 

Arden snickered from the end of the couch. 

“Are you laughing at Opie’s tongue action?” Jaime rubbed the dog’s muzzle, letting out a chuckle of his own as the creature wriggled closer. 

“No, look at what Maggie just sent me.” 

He did as instructed, his fingers brushing her calf as he took the device from her hands. “Is this on ClickIt?”

“Yeah. They’re writing cringy listicles about us now. Guess that means we’ve made it big.”  

“23 Reasons We All Love Arden Gale,” Jaime read aloud, though the words felt almost foreign in his mouth. He was used to reading Arden’s writing, but reading what other people wrote about her was an entirely different matter.  Feeling his hackles rise, he thumbed through the entries with trepidation. 

Her hair, her smile, her puns... Not even halfway through the list, his head was spinning at the bizarre sensation of seeing his wife’s image on the familiar site. 

#14. Her pencil skirts. Seriously, have you seen her hips? 

His finger slowed before reversing course. 

“The one about my hips?” she asked knowingly.

“Yeah. I mean, they’re not wrong. You know how i feel about them. It’s just... I can’t believe people are posting stuff like that.” 

“Does it make you jealous?” Slipping off the couch, she sat cross legged beside him on the rug. Jaime accepted the hand she placed in his lap, sighing contentedly as she wove their fingers.

“Nah, jealous isn’t the right word. I think it’s just a little strange to see people say that stuff about you online. You’re gorgeous, Arden. That’s not a secret. But it feels like they’ve turned you into an object. They’re missing the essence of what makes you amazing.” 

She squeezed his hand gently. “It’s part of being in the public eye. Most of them will never know me for real, so they’re just writing about what they can see. Not everyone knows me the way you do, babe.” 

“Thank goodness for that.” 

Arden giggled against his lips before pressing forward in a kiss. 

Kiss - Are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like?

“I choose...Arden.” 

“it’s your turn, birthday girl.”

Determined as she was to ignore her mom’s singsong voice, the flash from her disposable camera caught Arden off guard. She blinked quickly to erase the impression of light from the back of her eyelids, then pivoted on the carpet to stare the freckled boy. The giant red square floated above one of his ears.

“Truth or dare?” he asked. 

“Dare,” she announced, jutting out her chin to show that she wasn’t afraid of whatever he had to offer. Frank didn’t scare her. She’d bested him in last year’s spelling bee, after all. This was her chance to prove that she had guts as well as brains. 

Tucking her flyaway hairs behind both ears, she ignored the pounding in her chest that was almost certain to develop into a heart attack. 

“I dare you to kiss Jaime. On the lips.”

Her whole face turned to fire. Across the circle, the Atterly twins started snickering. A glance at her mother confirmed that her eyebrows had all-but disappeared beneath her feathered bangs. And Jaime? She couldn’t even bear to look in his direction.

“For five whole seconds,” Frank added with a smirk.

“Hey!” Olivia shrieked, “You already said the dare. It’s against the rules to add something else.” Maddie nodded solemnly at her sister’s intervention.  

“Fine.” he sat back against the couch cushion and folded his arms. “One second.” 

“Fine,” she agreed, feeling a surge of pride at how normal she’d managed to make the word sound. She hopped up from the floor and took a pair of steps to where Jaime was perched on a barstool. By the time she reached him, he’d hopped down to the floor. 

“It’s okay,” he promised, though his nerves were evident in his tone. “It’s just a dare.” 

“Yeah, just a dare.” Better get it over with, she thought as her tongue darted out to wet her dry lips. 

Leaning forward, Arden tried to pucker, but she was wincing too hard for the effort to be very convincing. With a deep breath, she pushed herself until her skin brushed his, chanted a silent Mississippi, and jerked away with enough force to incur whiplash.

She knew Jaime’s cheeks were tomato red, but she couldn’t stand to look at anything other than the floor during the journey back to her seat.

Her mother’s exaggerated retching noises, the mingled chorus of “Ewwww”s, and the inevitable “Jaime and Arden sitting in a tree...” were all interrupted by the sound of her best friend scurrying out of the living room. 

“Uh, I’ll be right back,” he explained before bolting out the front door. 

Rattled, but victorious, she reclaimed her spot on the carpet and tried to remember the dare she’d been keeping in the back of her mind for this turn. Unfortunately, all thoughts were centered around a single truth:

For as long as she lived, she was never going to forgive Frank Lipscomb.

Love Confession - How would they confess to their s/o?

Arden? Ar-dennn? 

Her typing slowed as she strained to hear the tenor of Jaime’s thoughts. As they grew louder, she could just make out the tune. 

Arrrrr-den. Arden, Arden, Arden.

Wiping her palm over her face, she marveled at the man’s antics and tried to refocus on the message in front of her. It was a game they played at least once a week. He’d think up a grand declaration of love and move closer and closer, testing how long it took for her to hear it. 

I love you. I love you even though I just tripped over the shoes that you left by the door. Again. 

“Sorry!” she hollered into the hall. “I’ll move them when I’m done with this email.”

He was close enough for her to make out his footsteps now, and it wasn’t long before he appeared in the doorway to her office. 

"Were you singing my name to the tune of that insurance jingle?” Question posed, she rolled away from the desk to get a better look at him. 

Opie’s leash dangled loose from his hands, but the dog was still firmly attached to his heel. “I was. He loved it,” Jaime added, gesturing to the animal beside him. “And that was from all the way in the backyard, too. I think that’s the farthest yet.” 

“It’s like our own personal homing system,” she considered, stretching out a hand to beckon Opie toward her. She heard the faint tinkle of a bell as Jinx abandoned her perch and made her way forward for some attention of her own. Arden lowered her other hand to accommodate both animals. “As long as you’re thinking, I can’t lose you. You thinking nice things about me is just a bonus.” 

“I’m married to a superhero,” Jaime reminded, “How could I ever think anything else?”

“You’re such a hopeless romantic.” Retrieving the hand from Jinx’s back, she prodded his chest with a pointed finger. “But I love you so much,” she admitted, eyes giddy with humor. 

Marriage - Do they want to get married? How do they propose? What would the marriage be like? (See also The Girl Next Door and OTP Prompt #10)

The mattress dipped as Jaime climbed back into bed. Arden rolled onto her side while he closed the distance, and they met somewhere in the middle in a tangle of limbs. He’d been away long enough for his legs to be cold, yet the feeling of his skin against her own was still a comfort. 

“It’s pouring down rain,” he informed, the words somewhat muffled by her pillow. “I had to follow Opie around with the umbrella.”

“Poor little guy.” She traced a hand across his shoulder blades, trying to transfer her warmth to him. “And poor you. Thanks for taking him out.”

Jaime kissed her forehead and tugged her leg around his waist. 

They fell into comfortable silence, content in the ebb and flow as their breaths synchronized. Arden could just hear Jinx padding back up the stairs for a post-breakfast nap under their bed. 

“This is nice,” she hummed into his chest. 

“It is.” 

“It’s just a shame our first Saturday as a married couple is so rainy and gross.” 

His chest shook with quiet laughter. “Like you wanted to do something outside in the middle of March.” 

"I’m just saying. It seems like an ill omen or something.” 

Jaime shifted his weight, separating from her just enough to meet her eyes in the muted light. “I think it’s a sign that we need to spend the day testing out all of the blankets people gave us as wedding presents.”

“And drinking coffee.” 

“Of course. With pancakes?”

She huffed in surprise. “I’m offended you even have to ask. Pancakes are a must. We keep that stash of frozen blueberries for a reason.” 

Jaime nuzzled into her cheek, his breath heavy at her throat as he spoke, “I know we’re only a week in, but marriage so far? It’s pretty great.” 

[fleckcmscott]

Watch What Happens - Chapter 22

Chapter links: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21

Summary: Arthur, an aspiring comedian, has struggled to find normalcy and compassion his entire life. Y/N, a hard-working paralegal and transplant to Gotham, has just been put on a case for the Wayne Foundation. When they meet, unexpected sparks fly.

Chapter warning: Angst, Swearing

Words: 3,372

A/N: Again, special thanks to @ithinkimawriter​ for beta-reading this chapter and her encouragement! All the love goes to her!

It was hard for Arthur to fathom that he was backstage at his idol's show. Being there in the dressing room, sitting in front of the vanity mirror with all its lights, was incredible. If he hadn't been able to feel the bristles of the brush when he put foundation on, the cool of the water as he drank it out of the fancy glass they'd provided, or perceive the way the warm smoke from his cigarette filled his lungs with every drag, he would have been sure this was all make-believe.

The nearby table had a set of bowls with various snacks. He wasn't hungry, but he tried them anyway, wanting to keep himself busy. The round, beige nuts, a variety had hadn't eaten before, had a buttery flavor he liked - he'd have to ask Y/N what kind they were when she got there. And there were individually wrapped pieces of chocolate with a gooey center - he stuck a few of those in his pocket for later. There was also a gelatin pyramid with fruit and marshmallows suspended in it; he stayed away from that completely.

Bouncing up and down on his feet, he hung onto the open front of his suit jacket, pulling at the soft, red fabric. He cocked his head and looked in the mirror. His hair was slicked back more neatly than at the open-mic night. The skin of his face was a bit smoother, the lines in it softened by make-up and the gentle lighting of the room. He'd done a good job with his appearance, he thought as he fixed the collar of his white shirt. Now he just had to get through his material.

He sat in the chair before the vanity and started paging through his notebook, chuckling to himself. It had been impossible to memorize everything he'd written the past few days, though he knew one or two jokes by heart. He sometimes had difficulty with retention, anyway. Reading his set would be sufficient if his delivery was correct. If he could get the words out, it would work.

There was a knock at the door, then it suddenly opened. More emotion than expected filled Arthur when he turned to see Murray Franklin, the man he'd fantasized of being loved and accepted by ever since he was a little boy. His chest tightened, and he didn't try to hide the watering of his eyes, rising from his chair excitedly and taking the man's hand. "I feel like I know you," Arthur said. "My mother and I have been watching you forever."

Murray simply smiled, nodded, and delivered instructions: nothing too edgy, no dirty jokes, and no cursing. Arthur would be right on after Dr. Sally. "Didn't you have a guest?"

"She's not here yet. But she will be," Arthur answered, nodding to convince himself Y/N would run into the room any minute.

"Good. Someone will come get you, okay? Good luck," Murray said.

"Thanks, Murray."

Once the the host left and the door closed behind him, Arthur eased into the make-up chair and let out a long breath. He glanced up at the clock on the wall. The airing of the show was going to start in ten minutes. She'll be here. She wouldn't miss this. She wouldn't do that to you. He turned to the news playing on television. All he could do was wait and hope she'd show up soon.

~~~~~

Getting into the building had been straightforward. The doorman had asked for Y/N's name, she'd said it was "Melissa Treble," and, after finding her on the guest list, he'd let her through the backstage entrance. He hadn't even asked for an ID. It left her wondering if they were always lax, or her still being dressed in her office clothes had helped. Despite the ease of entry, her heart was hammering in her chest. She held her handbag to her as if some invisible force might rip it away. Straightening the visitor badge clipped to her blouse, she tried to walk as nonchalantly as possible, searching for a map of the building.

When she found the elevators, she read the directory hanging between them carefully. NCB news studios were on the fourth floor, and the offices for it were on the fifth. She wasn't going to try to run into the studio while they were in the middle of a broadcast and get arrested for trespassing. That wouldn't do. She decided to look for the stairwell and walk to the offices' floor. The stairs would be less crowded, she assumed, making it unlikely she'd be seen.

As she climbed, her steps growing slower with every floor, she took off her heels. The concrete was cold on her nylon-stockinged toes. But the discomfort kept her focused on the task at hand instead of allowing her to fixate on being nervous. The anxiousness she felt wasn't only for herself, but also for Arthur. She knew what she was doing was a desperate, last ditch attempt at making a difference. That even if she succeeded in getting her information to someone, it didn't mean anything would be done with it.

But Arthur was putting himself out there, against her advice, on the show of the asshole who'd made fun of his disability. Though she hadn't seen him have an attack since last week, she hoped he wouldn't start laughing uncontrollably. And that his new stand-up wasn't only filled with cute jokes, which would invite unkind snickers. She simply wanted him to succeed. Perhaps that would help him shed the insecurity she knew he still carried, and he'd be free to display the grace she'd seen glimpses of when he dared to trust himself. Maybe he'd finally realize how terrific he was.

She rested against the railing when she reached the fifth floor, then opened the metal door leading out of the stairwell. Sticking her head into the hallway, she looked each way, relief filling her when she saw the emptiness of the perpendicular corridors. She snuck out and held her breath as she shut the door behind her. So far so good.

It was impossible for her to know which way to turn - it was a fifty/fifty chance either way - so she picked the way with the fewest illuminated office lights. Keeping her shoes in her hand, she walked quietly along the wall, reaching into her purse and grabbing the envelope with "NCB News" typed on the front. She needed to find a door labeled "reports" or "tips" or something, anything that sounded vaguely like they'd look at her notes instead of throwing them away.

"What do you mean you didn't receive the finance report? I faxed it over this afternoon," a man's voice said, coming from one of the nearby offices. Y/N slunk back, creeping into the door of an open, presently unoccupied office behind her. The sound of papers being shuffled echoed against the linoleum floor. She closed her eyes, trying hear his movements over the pounding pulse in her ears. "Hold on, hold on. I'll bring it down to you," the man continued.

At the sound of his chair scraping against the floor, she moved to crouch behind a desk. She bit her knuckle to stop a chuckle at the ridiculousness of a grown woman playing hide-and-seek in an office building. The man walked by, grumbling to himself the whole time. When she heard the distant ding of the elevator, she tip-toed to the door and looked into the hallway.

Y/N considered the best option. The man's office door was open. He had mentioned reports. This was as good a chance as any. She darted across the corridor, dropped the envelope on his desk, and scurried back towards the exit. Heading back to the stairwell, she broke into silent sprint as she got closer. She tried to stop before slamming into the door. But her slippery nylons caused her to slide and bang into it as it opened. Ignoring the possibility that she'd just given herself away, she started booking it down to the second floor so she could see Arthur.

The show was already being aired as she walked to his dressing room, trying to catch her breath. Monitors in the hallway were playing Dr. Sally's latest advice and Franklin's stupid quip about how he would try her tips with his next wife. When she reached the door labeled "Arthur Fleck," she didn't knock before opening it.

"Y/N..." Arthur sprang up from his chair and went to her, taking her hand in his. "I was afraid you wouldn't make it."

Smiling, she leaned back against the door and exhaled sharply. "I'm sorry," she said, giggling, trying to expel the stress in her body. "There were a lot of stairs. But, thanks to you, I did it." She laughed lightly, and started rummaging in her purse. "It's out of my hands now. Here," she said, pulling out a black-eyed Susan. She stuck it in his jacket pocket and gave it a light pat. Then she took a few seconds to look him over, appreciating how his suit accentuated the lankiness of his physique. "You look great. Are you nervous?"

The corner of his mouth crooked uncertainly as he angled his head to look down at the flower. "A little. But you're here." He gave a small shrug. "Maybe everything will be okay."

She only had a few moments to tighten his red and gold tie before a producer came to get him. The peck she gave Arthur was quicker than she would have liked, but he was already half out the door. With a grasp of his hand, she was able to stop him for a split second. "Be yourself and don't let them mock you."

~~~~~

Arthur closed his eyes as he waited behind the curtain to go on stage, a hint of ire joining the strains of anxious excitement in his frame. They were playing that terrible Pogo's tape again, and Murray was telling Dr. Sally he thought Arthur had problems. He needed to focus in order to do the entrance he'd practiced.

He stretched an arm in front of him, then circled his closed fists, one over the other, until an open hand was held over his head as he breathed out. Then he extended his arms, one in front of him and one back, as far as he could, before bringing his hand back to smooth down his chest and stomach. Arthur could sense the producer next to him staring his way as he performed his strange ballet, then stepping back from him. But Arthur didn't care. The movements would soothe and, he hoped, center him enough so he could get out onto that stage and say what wanted.

As the multi-color curtain was opened for him, he was struck by how blinding and hot the stage lights were. And the spotlight was a hell of a lot brighter than the one at Pogo's. Still, he stepped out with polish, gave the audience a confident nod and wave, and went to Murray's desk. After firmly shaking Murray's hand, he approached Dr. Sally. Compelling himself to be brave, he took her offered hand, kissed her cheek sweetly, and whispered a soft, "Thanks." She looked a bit confused, but he thought he detected amusement, too. Then he wiped off the yellow chair next to Murray's desk and sat down, adjusting himself and crossing his legs, his hands folded neatly in his lap.

His breath caught as he looked up into the audience. This was it. This was real. This was the culmination of a dream. There were hundreds of people sitting there, cheering for and seeing him. And there were even more at home watching him on television. His lips parted as his gaze roved over the crowd. He'd barely heard Murray speaking when his question broke through the haze he was in, "Are you all right?"

"Yeah," Arthur said quietly, nodding. "This is exactly how I imagined it."

"Well, that makes once of us," Murray quipped.

That and the audience's laughter brought Arthur back. He forced himself to smile and remember he wasn't there only as a guest. But also as a prop.

"So," Murray started. "I know you're a comedian. You live here in Gotham. Backstage you said you grew up watching this show with your mother?"

Turning to him, Arthur nodded, loosening his shoulders, trying to be self-assured. "That's right, Murray."

Murray gestured towards the camera almost directly in front of them. "Is she watching tonight? Do you want to say hi?"

Arthur knew greeting his mother would be the usual thing to do. But, apart from brief asides, he hadn't been able to think about Penny without angrily tearing up. He clenched his jaw and waved the suggestion away. "No."

After a pause, Murray continued. "Well, have you been working on any new material? You wanna tell us a joke?"

The throng in the studio roared, applause filling Arthur's ears. He didn't answer immediately, reveling in their attention. "Yeah?" he asked them, his beam becoming genuine. His throat clenched as he straightened his legs and put his hands on his knee. It was hard to believe, but they actually seemed to want to listen to him. "Okay." Flashing Murray a grin, he pulled his journal from the waistband of the back of his trousers.

Murray started in on Arthur as he soon as he began flipping through the pages. "He's got a book. A book of jokes." As Arthur searched, Murray continued to badger. "Take your time. We've got all night."

Arthur gave Murray side-eye and chuckled to himself as he found what he was looking for. "Okay, okay. Here's one." He swallowed, then took a deep breath. "Knock knock"

Murray pointed at the book. "And you had to look that up?"

At the sound of everyone laughing at him, Arthur’s face became serious. Murray was already making the effort to be mean to him. Arthur looked at Murray's co-host, seated next to Dr. Sally on the couch. His guffaws were the loudest. "I wanna get it right," Arthur said earnestly. "Knock knock."

"Who's there?" Murray answered exaggeratedly.

"It's the police, ma'am. Your son jumped off of Wayne Tower." Arthur started to snicker. "He's dead."

"Oh, no, no, no." Dr. Sally rounded on him as the audience groaned. "No. You cannot joke about that!"

Murray sounded annoyed. "Yeah, that's not funny, Arthur." He tapped his cue cards against his desk, addressing the crowd as he admonished him. "That's not the kind of humor we do on this show."

"Okay. I'm-" Nodding furiously, Arthur continued. "Yeah, I'm sorry. It's just, you know..." He tightened his mouth. "It's been a rough few days, Murray." Sniffling, he tried to smile though the pain welling in him. "My mother having a stroke, finding out I was abused as a kid, trying to meet my father."

Murray pressed his lips together before seemingly deciding to try to save the segment. "It sounds like you had a tough week." Arthur flinched when Murray nudge his arm with his elbow. "Come on, tell us another wisecrack. But a family one, this time." he said, pasting on a showbiz smile.

Arthur rolled his eyes and closed his book. "Why is everyone so upset about my joke?" he asked.

Murray began to scold him. "Because that's too serious to kid about. People who would try that are sick. We should-"

"I've been that person," Arthur said, throwing his forearm down on his leg. "And if it was me dying on the sidewalk, you'd walk right over me." He drew his brows together, turning more fully in his seat. "You think it's funny to play my video, to invite me here to make fun of me, but I can't joke about what I know?"

There was disbelief in Murray's face, as if he couldn't believe Arthur was calling him on his bullshit. "That video got you here. On the biggest TV show in Gotham." The crowd cheered. They seemed to be taking Murray's side.

Fury grew in Arthur as they brushed off his words. "Comedy is subjective, Murray. Isn't that what they say?” Didn't the people of this city know the harm they'd caused him over the years? That tape had tormented him. And they didn’t even realize they were laughing because of his condition. “All of you," he said straight to the audience, "the system that knows so much, decides what's right or wrong. The same way you decide what's funny," he pointed at himself, "or not." Giggling, he indicated Murray.

Murray was looking over Arthur's shoulder as he spoke. "Look, Arthur, if you're not careful, we're going to have to stop this interview."

Arthur felt like he was being ignored, again. They thought what he had to say wasn't worth the air it took to speak it. He tried to take a deep breath, reminding himself Y/N was watching backstage. That he could finally look forward to the weeks ahead because, at last, someone loved him.

But as much as her affection had improved his life, helped him get through every day, it wasn't enough to erase his hurt and anger. And now that he had this platform and was being seen, now that he'd opened his mouth, he couldn't stop talking. His volume rose as he continued. "Have you seen what it's like out there, Mur-ray? Do you ever actually leave the studio? I've been in enough observation rooms to make a few observations."

The wetness in his eyes distracted him for only a moment before he continued. "Nobody’s civil anymore!” he yelled. But then his voice got quiet, cracking on his next words. “Nobody thinks what it's like to be the other guy."

He thought of the possibility of being thrown out of his apartment, and Mr. Wayne socking him in the face when all he wanted to do was talk. "You think men like Thomas Wayne ever think what it's like to be someone like me? To be somebody but themselves? They don't. They just think we'll sit there and take it."

Murray scoffed at him. "There's so much self-pity, Arthur. I'll tell you-"

"And you're awful, Murray."

“Me? I’m awful?” Murray sounded incensed. “Oh, yeah? How am I awful?”

The skin of Arthur's chin trembled as he tried to hold himself together. "I never had a father growing up. I always wished he was you. I loved you. But you're just like the rest of 'em."

Murray folded his arms and leaned on his desk, narrowing his eyes at him. “You don’t know the first thing about me, pal. I invited you on here and all you're doing is insulting me.”

Arthur swallowed and looked up at the ceiling, pressing his lips together. "How about another joke, Mur-ray?"

"I think we've heard enough of your jokes," Murray said sternly.

If he was about to get kicked off, Arthur wanted to end with a zinger. "What's the worst part of having a mental illness?" he started, feeling tears start despite his efforts to hold them back.

Murray nodded towards someone in the back. "Gene, cut to commerci-"

Arthur interrupted, his voice breaking. "People expect you to behave as if you don't."

It got quiet, then. Arthur decided no one knew how to respond to the reality in the joke he'd just told. As the silence from the audience, the other guests, and Murray lingered, he started chuckling. He placed his hand on the arm of the chair and squeezed, wiping at his eyes with the heel of his palm as his body shook and he bent forward with laughter.

After a minute, he heard the click of high-heels approaching. When Y/N knelt in front of him, he met her gaze and let out a breath of relief. "Y/N," he said, swiping at his nose. She'd put her hand on his knee. He reached to cover it with his fingers, holding tight. "You're still here," he whispered.

The corner of her mouth quirked up as she nodded, her eyes rimmed red. She squeezed gently as she addressed him with a shaky voice. "Let's go home."

Tag list (Let me know if you want to be added!): @harmonioussolve​ @clowndaddyfleck​ @sweet-nothings04​ @stephieraptorr​ @rommies​@invisiblewispofwhimsey @let-the-stars-fall-in-the-abyss​ @gruffle1​

[larkiwrites]

“Redemption” Chapter 12

AU: Supernatural Title: Redemption Chapter: Twelve Characters: Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester, Reader Word Count:  2,293 Pairing: Getting There…. Warnings: Mentions of being restrained, being drugged, and being undressed/re-clothed while unconscious.  A/N: This chapter flips between (Y/N)’s POV and more of Dean’s POV. Feel free to provide feedback / comments / suggestions / etc. Thanks for sticking around. 

Chapter 11  |  Chapter 13  |  Masterlist

You awoke groggily, your eyes struggling to open. The only time you could ever recall feeling this way was after having your tonsils removed. The drugs the doctors had given you to knock you out for the surgery had also made everything, your eyelids included, heavy and slow to respond. Fear flitted through you as you recalled the burning of your lungs as you ran past cornstalk after cornstalk and the fierce grip of strangers’ hands upon your wrists, just before everything went black. Had they drugged you? They must have, you couldn’t recall much of anything after the black fabric was pulled over your head. Shit.

You tried to steady your breathing and take in your environment the best you could, even without vision. Your thoughts felt hazy, too, you noted as you tried to focus on your other senses. You were cold, your wrists were bound behind your back by something metal, and all you could hear was the quiet dripping of nearby water… by the sounds of it there wasn’t a lot of water, either. It almost sounded like a sink faucet had been all but turned off, allowing only the slightest dribble of liquid to flow through and pool until it formed a droplet heavy enough to fall. You inhaled deeply through your nose and scrunched up your face at the familiar scent of mildew mingled with dirt.

You wiggled your toes and realized they were no longer covered by the socks and shoes you previously wore. You could feel the gritty texture of damp earth beneath your bare feet, bringing the realization upon you that you were no longer in any of your clothing. Whatever you wore now felt more like a skimpy silk nightgown or lingerie than actual clothing. You shuddered at the thought of someone unknown undressing you while you were unconscious.

With a strain, your eyelids managed to part. There was little to no light but you tried nonetheless to strain your eyes and take in your environment. You were underground or in a cave of some kind and you couldn’t tell if the darkness came from your location alone or if it was still night.

“Ah, she awakens…” a feminine voice whispered through the dark.

----- *Dean’s perspective

“I don’t think she took the road, Dean,” Sam tried to keep his tone neutral. They had decided to check the home they had found her at last, where she had worked to earn some extra cash for them. When they found no one in the house or on the property they had taken the car back the other direction, hoping against hope to see her walking somewhere along the side of the road.

“I’m starting to think you’re right, Sammy. Son of a bitch,” Dean hit the steering wheel with his palm out of frustration.

The elder Winchester pulled the Impala back into its place at the motel. Within minutes the brothers had gathered several precautionary items from the trunk of the car and headed out on foot. (Y/N) had a considerable head-start on the two of them but they weren’t about to give up and leave her to fend for herself.

At Sam’s suggestion the they rounded the building, instead of heading to the front of it and the road. They searched for signs that (Y/N) had been anywhere near here, their eyes straining through the dark of the night. Dean had never noticed before now, but there was a dirt road, just wide enough for a four-wheeler, leading away from the paved lot of the motel. He headed toward it, beckoning his brother to follow.

----- *(Y/N)’s perspective

Your gaze snapped upward at the sound of the voice. You could vaguely make out a silhouette standing about a yard in front of where you sat against a stone wall. You bit your tongue, refusing to answer them.

“They will want to see you soon,” the hushed voice continued, causing a shiver to run down your spine.

Your thoughts flew back to Sam and Dean. They had tried to tell you it wasn’t safe where you were, hadn’t they? But then the foggy memories had come to light, revealing them to be dangerous. You swallowed a lump in your throat as you fought back tears. You were alone, really and truly alone, and there was no way out of this.

A cold hand made painful contact with your cheek, causing your head to snap to the side and bringing you from your reverie, “I am speaking to you, oblation.”

“Fuck off,” you spat toward the woman. What had she called you? Your mind began to race over every English word you could recall. Oblation did not appear to be one of them.

The woman hissed at you, actually hissed, before retreating to the spot she had previously occupied. Psychotic woman, check. Shackles, check. What may as well be a dungeon? Check. You had to find a way out of here.

----- *Dean’s perspective

“Dean,” Sam nudged his brother as he aimed his light toward a cornfield up ahead.

They had followed the dirt road as quickly as they could while still looking for signs of (Y/N) everywhere. One of the cornstalks at the edge of the road was bent and leaning over. The brothers’ eyes met and Dean rushed into the field, this being their only lead.

“Dean!” Sam followed his brother into the crop, “This could be nothing, Dean.”

“Yeah, well it could be something, Sammy, and I don’t have anything else to go on. Do you?”

Sam sighed and followed his brother into the vegetation. It was still dark and they had no way of knowing which way she could possibly have gone, he worried they would end up lost in the middle of the corn in the middle of the night and lose any hope of finding her.

“Sam, I’ve got more broken stalks up here, I think we’re heading the right way,” Dean hollered over his shoulder. Sam’s lips pressed into a thin line but he followed regardless.

----- *(Y/N)’s perspective

You had no idea how much time had passed since you had opened your eyes. There was no shift in the lighting and your only indication that time had indeed moved forward was the growing stiffness in your joints. As quietly as you could you stretched your legs out, taking stock of the fact that your feet and legs were not bound. You tried to stretch your arms out behind you, feeling along the stone for any kind of chain or bracket that may hold you to the wall itself, but could find nothing. Your mouth was not gagged, either. This didn’t fit the pattern of any kidnapping you had ever heard of before, that you could remember. Don’t the movies usually show legs and arms tied, eyes covered, tape over the lips, and chained to a wall or post? All you had were the metal links holding your wrists together behind you. Oh, and crazy-ass hissing lady standing guard. Well, that and the fact that you could barely see anything and had no idea where you were.

“What are the chances of getting some water?” You spoke up, hoping you might be able to get some information out of your supposed-guard.

You could hear her muffled footsteps as she approached you. Her shadow loomed near you and suddenly you felt warm spit hit you in the face. You jerked your head back in shock at the contact as she snickered.

“Fuck off,” she sneered as she walked away from you once more.

How the hell did she see in the dark? She obviously could, at least a hell of a lot better than you could. Getting the drop on her would be hard. This is her territory; she knows it better than you, even if she couldn’t see better than you could. Maybe that was the reason for the low security. You had been drugged and thrown into a pit you couldn’t make heads or tails of, you had no lighting, no weapons, no shoes for hells sake.

Ok, steady breaths, (Y/N). You thought to yourself. You weren’t going to escape if you were busy panicking, and you sure as hell weren’t going to just sit here and wait around for whatever that bitch had in mind for you.

----- *Dean’s perspective

“Sammy, I think we’re almost to the end…”

“Dean… uh, is the forest?” Sam’s eyes widened as they approached the looming darkness ahead of them.

“Shit,” Dean breathed.

The two men slowed their pace as they broke through the last of the corn stalks and into the thicket of trees. She could have gone any direction from here, and if these were the woods on the western outskirts of town then they were screwed.

“Dean, this isn’t looking good…”

“Shut it, Sammy. We move forward, we’re not giving up on her.”

Sam lifted his arms in surrender, “I didn’t say we should, Dean, but maybe it would be better to wait for the sun—”

“No,” Dean’s voice was stern, “She already has too far of a head-start and at this rate they might already have her, Sammy. We can’t wait.”

“What is that?” Sam’s light shone on a small bundle of color that stood out against the darkness surrounding them. The older brother approached it while Sam kept his eyes peeled about them for any sign of danger.

“Fuck,” Dean swore under his breath as he picked up the material. He recognized the shirt in his hands as one he had seen (Y/N) wear quite often. The soft fabric still smelled like her shampoo but it was cold, no traces of body heat left. “It’s hers, Sammy.”

Sam’s eyes came back to his brother and focused on what he had in his grasp. He stepped forward quickly, taking the clothing from his brother’s grasp. “Shit, Dean. We gotta find them before it’s too late.”

“You think I don’t know that?”

“Right, well, it was to the left of the tree, so let’s head that way,” Sam directed his light to their left.

“And if it’s misdirection?”

“I don’t know, Dean, it’s not like we can go everywhere at once.”

Dean swore again before taking the shirt from his brother’s grasp and pocketing it in the inside of his jacket. He marched away, to their left, just as his kid brother had suggested. He knew Sam’s mind was thinking more clearly than his, his was far too clouded by emotion, and hell- they wouldn’t have made it this far if he hadn’t listened to the nerd back at the motel to begin with. He just wasn’t going to tell Sam, that. No need to let his already-inflated head get any bigger.

----- *(Y/N)’s perspective

Pushing down the trepidation you felt, you slowly shifted in your spot, trying to quietly get to your feet. You couldn’t crawl with your hands behind your back and there was no use trying to walk on your knees when your feet weren’t bound. Besides, you had an idea to bring your arms to your front. The woman standing guard didn’t move, that you could tell, and she definitely didn’t address you. Maybe you could get away with this, after all. You grasped the metal restraints to try to prevent any unnecessary noise as you tried to move your arms up, manipulating your joints into odd angles and pulling your wrists over your head, bringing your hands in front of you. It hurt like hell to stretch your joints in ways they weren’t used to going, but this gave you options.

Your mind raced over your only plan as you began to tip-toe toward the figure of your only guard. You had no weapons, and you knew you lacked the strength to hit the woman hard enough to do anything but aggravate her. You didn’t know if you had the strength to overcome her at all, but you had to try. You couldn’t hold out hope that the Winchesters would find you, and frankly, you weren’t positive you wanted them to.

As quickly as you could you threw your arms over the woman’s head and jerked her backward, using the chain between the cuffs on your wrists as a garrote. She gasped, her hands clutched at the chain desperately as you cut off her air supply, dragging her back into the dark until your back hit the cold stone you had previously sat against. The woman struggled against you, trying desperately to hit you. Her elbow came back into your gut, earning a breathy grunt from you. You ground your teeth together, refusing to allow yourself to bend over as pain blossomed in your abdomen. Instead, you forced yourself to pull harder, forcing her body into yours as you put more pressure on her neck. Her unwashed stench filled your nostrils and you swallowed bile as it rose in your throat, burning as it made its way up. What felt like an eternity passed before her body finally fell limp, the unexpected pull of the dead weight dragging you down with her. Releasing your hold on her you rolled away, gasping for air. Before you went further you checked her pulse, ensuring you hadn’t killed her. She was simply unconscious. She would wake up with a migraine from hell, but she would wake up. Despite how evil she seemed; you couldn’t bring yourself to actually kill her.

You allowed yourself to lie on your back for a moment, quietly bringing your breathing back to normal. Fear crept back into your mind as you thought over what you had just done. Where the hell had you learned to do that? Who were you?

----

-Next Chapter-

[not-your-housekeeper98]

That’s What Family Does

I finally got myself together and wrote another Supernatural fic! It’s reader insert which I usually hate, but it just worked out this way. I hope you all like it! Feel free to comment:)

AO3 link

Fanfiction.net

I’ve also decided to put the story under the keep reading in case someone prefers to read it on tumblr.

That's What Family Does Set shortly after the angels fall, this is a small glimpse into my version of events.

You tried so hard to focus on what Sam was saying. You knew this was an important meeting but this angel war had gone on for what felt like an eternity. You wanted to help in anyway you could but some sleep might be nice once in awhile. His voice droned on about strategy and battle positions. Occasionally someone interjected, but you couldn't focus. You were snapped out of your daydream when your name was called. Sam was giving you your assignment. You weren't really much of a fighter, in fact you had signed on in more of a nursing capacity, but this was an all hands on deck situation.

Sam continued, "I know you don't have any battle experience, but we do need a defender for the gap in the north fence. It is highly unlikely anyone will come at us from that angle, but we need all our bases covered. Call out if you have any trouble, we don't want you to get injured"

You nodded and Sam's voice went back to being background noise. The fence he had referred to ran around the farm buildings they were holed up in. Although they were dilapidated and falling apart, they had unique tactical advantages which made them as secure as a fortress.  For one thing, it was difficult to approach without being seen due to the lack of good cover. For another thing, the buildings though damaged were solid. Built of stones meant to last a long time, they were nearly impenetrable by gunfire. The fence itself in most places was a stone wall . Time however, had done its work, and it was falling apart in many places. It was one of these gaps that I had been assigned to defend. It was highly unlikely I would see any action there because the land ended in a cliff some two hundred yards ahead. Sam was right, no one would try to come that way.

Your thoughts shifted to the war itself. After the angels fell, they quickly took sides, each bitterly opposed to the other, and each with their own plan to get back to heaven. At this point they had united to form two main groups. One was convinced the answer was revenge, if they could capture and torture the angel responsible, he could get them back to heaven, or at the very least they might have a bargaining chip with Metatron. The other group consisted of the so-called angel responsible and his followers, who were working to find a more practical solution with the help of the Winchester brothers. The angel of course was Castiel, and it was clear to everyone that he and the brothers had a special relationship and were supremely loyal to each other. There had been some dissent at first when they joined the team, but the angels quickly realized that having humans on their side in a war fought on earth was actually useful. Many had even grown quite fond of them. It was a common sight to see a few angels watching curiously as Dean fiddled with his beloved car, humming all the while. Some had even garnered the courage to ask him questions about the impala, which he answered good-naturedly, amused by their interest. Sam was different, quiet and reserved, but with a firm strength that made him a natural leader. The angels grew to look up to him. Castiel was your favorite. You could see the pain and guilt that he tried to hide from everyone. This wasn't his fault but that made no difference to him. So many angels had died and the rest were suffering, lost in an unknown world with no way of getting home. But there was something more, a weariness about his eyes now that you couldn't understand. Everyone was tired, but this was different. You shrugged internally and tried to pay attention as the meeting wrapped up.

You were in an interesting position, not an angel nor a hunter, but the sibling of one. He had been killed on a hunt with the Winchesters right before this angel situation took a turn for the worse. You were devastated, but not altogether unprepared, this happened often to hunters. He was the last of your family and you had nowhere to go. The Winchesters agreed to let you tag along for awhile and learn the ropes, then Castiel had showed up one day and asked for help. You had quickly proven yourself to be very capable at patching up the wounded, thanks to the years of experience with your brother, and were officially a member of the team. You had even been put in charge of training some angels to assist you in the infirmary.

You walked over to your post slowly, kicking at stones in your path, still lost in thought, planning what you would do if you were attacked. A heavy stillness filled the air, grey clouds covered the sky adding to the oppressiveness of nature. It was hot without even a breeze to move the still trees. Looking around you, you saw angels taking up defensive positions at the most likely points of attack, crouching, angel blades drawn awaiting battle. You pulled yours out and felt its weight. You contemplated running it into another living being and shuddered, maybe this wasn't the life for you. At this juncture you reached the north wall. Sitting on one of the fallen stones, you prepared for a long wait.

It wasn't long before you heard shouts and cries from the other end of the compound. The battle had begun in earnest and as you heard the anguished cries of injured angels you fervently hoped it wasn't anyone you knew and loved. Distracted by the clash of blades you didn't see the flash of light ahead, but you did feel the breeze. Turning around, you saw an angel grinning, holding his blade aloft. You jumped up and froze in terror. The angel came closer still grinning.

"What did you do to get this spot" he laughed a coarse laugh.

You couldn't speak.

"My brothers are now sending puny humans to do their dirty work for them," his eyes glowed blue, "they don't care about you, they just want to go home."

You gained the strength to stumble back a few steps, your blade dropped with a clatter.

"You know, I might just enjoy killing you, watching the fear in your eyes and despair when you realize no one will come to save you. No one," he spat out, "you will die alone, except for me of course."

A second light appeared beside you. It was Castiel, disheveled, gripping the wall tightly, blood trickling from his nose, but glowing with power. His bright eyes met yours.

"Run."

He drew his blade, "get out of here, go."

As if a spell had been broken you ran to find Sam and Dean. Casting a glance over your shoulder you saw the angels fighting fiercely. Tripping over stones on the path you ran smack into Dean.

"Woah, woah, you okay?" Dean grabbed your shoulders, looking you over for injuries.

"No, no, it's Cas, he needs help...the north wall...please you have to hurry--"

Dean understood and handing you off to Sam who had just arrived on the scene, beckoned to several angels who headed off with him towards the way you had just come. You were sobbing as Sam, holding you tight, led you towards the main house. He settled you on the couch and handed you a glass of water. He sat next to you and you buried your head in his shoulder. He stroked you hair waiting for you to calm down enough to talk. Eventually you told him everything.

"I should have done something, fought him off or screamed for help, something. Now Cas is probably..." You trailed off as your eyes filled with tears again.

Sam looked worried but spoke reassuringly. "This wasn't your fault, if anything it was mine leaving you defenseless like that. I'm sorry and won't do that to you ever again. And don't worry about Cas, he's tough."

Sam was interrupted by Dean in the doorway. His shoulders were slumped forward and his whole demeanor spoke of exhaustion and distress.

"We're going to need some medical help," he said quietly, then made for the infirmary.

You choked back your tears. This was your area of expertise after all and you must keep it together no matter what had happened. Straightening up, you followed Sam and Dean. The infirmary was full, mostly minor injuries you noted with relief. The angels you had trained in first aid were handling things nicely. What drew your attention was a bloody, still form lying on a bed in the back.  Castiel appeared unconscious, ugly bruises were forming on his face and one eye appeared swelled shut, but the most pressing concern seemed to be a deep stab wound in his side and several lighter gashes across his chest. You swallowed hard and switched into emergency mode.

"I need gauze, lots of it and a suture kit, oh and some pain killers" you said as you grabbed a bandage from a nearby table and pressed down hard on the stab wound. Around you, people jumped to action. Under your hands Cas groaned, his back arching in pain as he tried to slide away from you. Dean stepped forward to hold him down and spoke soothingly. You couldn't hear what he was saying, but Cas seemed to understand and relaxed somewhat. You smiled gratefully at Dean and gave your full attention to stopping the bleeding. Sam appeared at your side with the necessary items and ripping open Cas's shirt, began to clean and sew up the other wounds. You cleaned and packed the stab wound, then taped a bandage on top. During these ministrations Cas remained mostly conscious, as his agonized screams attested. Eventually, you finished and got some painkillers and antibiotics in him. His were eyes closed and his face as pale as the sheets under him. Almost everyone else had been taken care of and the room was quiet.

"I'll stay with him for awhile in case he needs something, I'll let you know if anything changes," you said. Sam and Dean looked reluctant, but finally agreed.

Alone with Castiel, you studied him carefully. The lines of pain slowly eased from his face as the painkillers began to take effect. You held his hand, rubbing soothing circles with your thumb as you watched his chest rise and fall. You thought back to the angel who had threatened you. *He was wrong, so wrong. They do care about me, Cas cares about me. He was willing to risk death to save me, someone he hardly knows.* You thought that maybe you had found a family at last.

You woke up sometime later to find Cas's blue eyes looking into yours.

"Cas, you're awake. How are you feeling?"

"I've been better, but I'll heal." He attempted a chuckle then quickly changed his mind and he cringed in pain.

"I'll get you some more painkillers," you said and fumbled around on the shelves until you found what you were looking for. You helped him take the pills then you both settled to your original positions.

"I want to thank you," you faltered, "you saved my life a-and I don't think I could ever repay you." You dashed away the tears that had formed.

'I think we're even, you did save mine after all." Cas took your hand, "we're family and that's what family does. I should know, I've been saved by the Winchesters more times then I can count."

You laid your head down next to his and he wiped away a lingering tear. You felt safe, and somehow you knew you would all get through this, together, as a family.

[popatochisssp]

Make Your Mark, 2/10

Series: Undertale Relationship(s): Papyrus/Reader, Annoying Dog/Being Annoying Chapter Warnings: none

AO3 Link

In a world where soulmates exist, monsters and humans have one thing in common: the first time two soulmates touch, a mark randomly appears somewhere–anywhere– on their bodies to represent their match.

It still doesn’t make relationships easier…but maybe it does make them a little more interesting!

You were just getting breakfast to go.

It was supposed to be a very boring, typical day for you, just like any other boring, typical day, with absolutely nothing outside the ordinary to befall you—because nothing like that ever happened to you.

But you supposed in retrospect that there really is no way to expect the unexpected because as you step outside the café with your coffee and your muffin, you’re nearly knocked onto your ass by a supersonic blur of white.

Heart pounding in your chest, you clutch your breakfast protectively and watch the retreating form of the…dog? sprinting down the street.

Whose dog is that? you wonder to yourself. And how is it so fast on such short legs?!

And it’s probably wondering these questions that keeps you from noticing the skeleton racing down the street after it until he collides with you.

You stumble with a wordless cry of dismay as your poor coffee flies out of your hands, more concerned about it than the fact that you were about to hit the pavement yourself.

Luckily for you, it seemed you didn’t have to worry about either.

A scarlet glove whips forward and catches your cup one-handed, not even spilling a single drop, and a bony arm curls around your body, stopping your fall.

On this supposed-to-be-boring day, you find yourself being dipped like a damsel in a movie, staring up at the most handsome skull you’ve ever seen.

“FORGIVE ME, HUMAN,” he says, “THAT SURE WAS CARELESS OF ME! ARE YOU ALRIGHT?”

You gape at him for a moment, stunned. “Uh…I…you…”

The small part of you that isn’t starstruck screams, Get it together, dummy! and you shake your head.

“No, I’m! I’m fine, really, I wasn’t… I should’ve been paying more attention!” you assure him. “You’re…very fast!”

‘You’re fast’? Ugh! Stupid! That’s not—

The skeleton seems to smile, his chest puffing out a little. “OH, THANK YOU!” he replies, sounding pleased as punch.

…Oh. Huh.

He straightens you back on your feet with ease and passes you your coffee.

“UNFORTUNATELY, AS CUTE AS YOU ARE AND AS MUCH AS I’D LOVE TO STAND HERE AND TALK ABOUT MY UNPARALLELED SPEED, EVERY SECOND I WASTE TALKING IS A SECOND THAT BASTARD DOG GETS FURTHER AWAY FROM ME AND I CAN’T ALLOW THAT! YOU UNDERSTAND, OF COURSE?”

S…sorta?

Still, you nod emphatically and say, “Yeah, of course, you…go get ‘im!”

“I WILL! AND OBVIOUSLY, CALL ME IF ANYTHING…UH, WELL, YOU KNOW!”

And with that, the skeleton took off down the street again—at impressive speeds—yelling some words you’d have to look up later at the nearly-invisible speck of dog on the horizon.

Leaving you the literal definition of dazed and confused.

What did he mean, ‘if anything…’? And…how could you call him? You didn’t even know his name, much less his number!

And…had he called you ‘cute’ somewhere in there?

You’re so confused.

So frazzled.

You need your coffee.

-

You don’t put it together until halfway through your cup, when your sleeve rides up a little and…

There’s a…shape…there, on your wrist. A shape that definitely wasn’t there this morning—your brand new soulmark.

You were so flustered and tunnel-visioned at the time, but you must’ve touched somewhere, skin-on-bone, when that skeleton had almost bowled you over. There was no other explanation for the mark on your wrist now and your chest tightens.

You don’t know your own soulmate’s name. You don’t know his number or, or where he lives, or anything at all, and…!

Instinctively, you grab at your warm cup for comfort against the devastating thought of having met and lost your soulmate in the space of a few harried sentences, anxiously twisting the paper coffee-sleeve.

A tiny click against your desk makes you jump.

You look down, finding that there’s something sticking out of the coffee-sleeve, sliding out of it.

A mere second of fiddling frees it, only for you to realize you’re holding a business card, glossy black with gold edging and flames on the sides.

And a name.

‘THE GREAT PAPYRUS – PERSONAL TRAINER,’ it read above a phone number, email address, and skull emoji.

“…Holy shit,” you breathe aloud after a moment.

Your soulmate was smooth as hell.

You can’t wait to see him again.

-

It’s the work of a few phone calls to set up a date in between introductions, pleasantries, and inquiring after the well-being of the apparently kleptomaniacal dog that wasn’t even Papyrus’.

He wanted to meet you at the park at noon, and at precisely 12:02 PM, you watch Papyrus stroll up to you with a smile on his skull.

He’s wearing nice slacks and a sweater vest…but also a spiked leather jacket and combat boots. He has a cute little bunch of tulips in his gloved hands and a pair of red mirrored sunglasses taped to his skull.

You are so happy to see him.

“Hi, Papyrus!” you say. “You look great!”

“OF COURSE I DO!” he proclaims, passing you the tiny bouquet. “MY DATECLOTHES STRIKE THE PERFECT BALANCE BETWEEN ‘APPROACHABLE SKELETON-NEXT-DOOR’ AND ‘ENTICINGLY DANGEROUS BAD BOY’—NOTHING BUT THE BEST FOR THE FIRST PROPER MEETING OF MY SOULMATE!”

He leans toward you a little, pushing down his sunglasses and confiding in what you’re certain he believes to be a whisper, “IT’S ACTUALLY THE REASON I’M SO FASHIONABLY LATE…”

You are…halfway in love with this guy already.

“BUT ENOUGH ABOUT ME FOR NOW! YOU LOOK WONDERFUL, TOO! EVERY BIT DESERVING OF THE MARK YOU LEFT ME!”

You’re far too curious not to ask.

“Oh, can I…can I see it, or…?”

Papyrus is all too delighted to show you.

He rolls up his sleeve and pushes back his glove—you spare a second to marvel at the rarity, two people with soulmarks in nearly-matching spots—and your heart thumps a little harder at the sight of the colorful bow looped over the cluster of his carpals, flourishing ribbons twisting down around his ulna and radius.

You can hardly believe you left such a pretty thing on him.

“I THINK IT MEANS YOU’RE A GIFT!” he tells you. “YOU CERTAINLY FEEL LIKE ONE SO FAR, NYEH-HEH-HEH!”

Your face feels a little hot and you hasten to show him his mark in return.

“Here’s yours,” you say, holding out your wrist for his riveted inspection. “I, uh, I wasn’t sure what it was at first so I looked it up. I think it’s an…interlocking puzzle?” You laugh, a little sheepishly. “I can’t…really guess what that means…”

Far from disappointed by your lack of imagination, Papyrus looks excited.

“WELL, ISN’T THAT THE GREATEST JOY OF PUZZLES?” he asks, grinning eagerly. “SOLVING THEM?”

He’s so earnest— so positive and charming and delightfully offbeat.

You couldn’t have asked for a better soulmate.

“You’re absolutely right,” you say, holding out your hand to him.

Papyrus’ eye-sockets go wide behind his sunglasses, color dusting along his cheekbones.

“O-OH! HAND-HOLDING? ON THE FIRST DATE???” He looks around as if to make sure the coast is clear before slowly placing his hand into yours. “I…! I LIKE YOUR STYLE, SOULMATE! SO DARING AND EDGY!”

And with your bow and his puzzle-box side-by-side, the two of you head off to enjoy the park.

UT!Sans | US!Sans | US!Papyrus | UF!Sans | UF!Papyrus | SF!Sans | SF!Papyrus | HT!Sans | HT!Papyrus

[siobhaneardley]

The Blair Witch Project & Beyond: The Increasing Laziness of Found Footage Films.

The ‘Found Footage’ method of storytelling has been around for a good while now; dating back to, you guessed it the 19th century with novels such as Frankenstein and Dracula (there will come a day when I don’t mention Dracula in an essay on horror, but apparently today is not that day). These novels were often written in a diary format, or composed of letters that have been compiled by the author.

The Blair Witch Project is perhaps the most famous film in the medium, due to its being a cultural phenomenon back in 1999 when it was first released, and it was the first big success of a film of its nature. And is still notirous to this day, having a few of the most famous words in horror history: 

Although many may think that it was the first of its kind, the found footage format of filmmaking has its roots in 1980 with the release of “one of the most controversial films ever made”, Ruggero Deodato’s Cannibal Holocaust. The film follows an anthropologist on a rescue mission to find a film crew who venture into the Amazon to film indigenous tribes. Monroe, the anthropologist, finds the footage the dead crew shot, and it is presented as if we are watching it as Monroe is. Now, I will admit by description is rather vague as I did attempt to watch the film, but I honestly couldn’t make it through because there are scenes that are just too graphic for me.

The film has perhaps the most extensive disclaimer I have ever seen:

“The following motion picture contains intense scenes of extreme violence and cruelty. As distributors of this film, we wish to state with absolute sincerity that by no means do we condone the artistic decisions employed by the makers of this film. However, as firm believers in the constitutional right of free speech, we do not believe in censorship.

Therefore, we are presenting Cannibal Holocaust for the very first time in its uncut uncensored original form, with all sequences photographed by the filmmakers however offensive and repugnant, presented fully intact. What you will see will definitely shock and offend you. Nonetheless, it should be viewed as a disturbing historical document of a bygone era of extreme irresponsibility which no longer exists and hopefully with never exist again”

Initially the phrase ‘definitely shock and offend you’ did make me scoff, because I honestly thought that a horror film made in 1980 would be a walk in the park. Boy, was I wrong. Do yourself a favour and just don’t bother watching this film. I can handle pretty much anything, but this film contains scenes of violent rape and murder, and live killing of animals. It is honestly not worth it, as the reast of the film isn’t that great, the acting is pretty terrible.

Anyway, back to it. Cannibal Holocaust was such a controversial release at the time, because of the sheer explicitness of the film, and because everyone thought it was real. So real that the director was arrested on charges of obscenity and then murder, as the director told the actors to go into hiding a year after the film was released to create authenticity, as soon as the actors resurfaced to give testimony, the charges were dropped, but he was still fined for charges of animal cruelty.

Before The Blair Witch Project there were only eight films of its kind made, after it’s release in 1999, there have been around 150, that’s 150 in the space of nearly 20 years. What made The Blair Witch Project so successful that is inspired so many more filmmakers to create similar found footage films? 

This notion of the authenticity of found footage films is perhaps its biggest draw and the most masterful example of creating an authentic narrative is The Blair Witch Project. The films genesis lies in 1993 when the directors Eduardo Sánchez and Daniel Myrick discovered that some paranormal investigative documentaries were often scarier than fictional horror films, and got to work on the film, initially creating the mythology that would be the basis for the ‘documentary’.

Set in Burkettsville, Maryland, formerly ‘Blair’ the mythology is based on a witch who was murdered by the townspeople, her spirit supposedly continues to haunt the woods surrounding the town, causing the deaths of numerous people from the town.

Heather, Josh and Mike, the three students featured in the film set out to the woods to film a documentary about the Blair Witch, after two days they get lost in the woods leading to them supposedly dying at the hands of the witch, however the ending is left purposefully ambiguous, showing no deaths on screen. However, the events that occur in the last 10 minutes suggest the death of the filmmakers, due to our knowledge of the mythology of the witch.

This mythology is fleshed out even more in the mockumentary that was made by Sánchez and Myrick, and subsequently premiered on the Sci-Fi channel before the film was due to be released. The mockumentary delves deep into the story of the witch, but also contains interviews with the missing student’s family and friends. If this wasn’t enough, there was also a website made providing all these details, with even more pictures of the evidence found with the footage shown in the film, therefore, “The Blair Witch Project does not begin and end with the theatre release; the film is a piece of a broader narrative” (Keller, 72). The website and documentary were so successful that an ex Maryland police officer offered to help in the search for the lost students. Which was only exemplified by the actors being listed as deceased on IMDB.

With the mythology set, the authenticity of the film does not stop there. The shoot in the woods lasted eight days, in which the three actors were pretty much left to their own devices. There was no script written for the film, just a guideline of the basic narrative. Each day the actors would leave the film rolls in a set location found of the GPS by the rest of the crew, and they would be left with food and very small amounts of direction. 

Myrick the co-director describes the film as “not like a normal film: the actors would work the cameras, film each other all the time” they only intervened if they felt they needed to tone it down and when they needed to create the nighttime scenes in which they would shake the tent make creepy noises. Keller suggests that “within the semiotics of the film, the same unstrady images that reveal the presence of the camera also suggests ‘reality television’, a genre of film that lacks the polish of cinematic realism, but signifies the authenticity of the events depicted” (74). 

The aftermath of all this hard work, left cinema viewers stunned by the film, and had them asking, was it all real? It must be there was so much evidence to suggest so, back in the day, if there were official websites on the internet, then it must be true. However nowadays we have learned our lesson and try not to believe everything we see online.  

For me, I watched the film not really believing it was true, but it’s the notion that it might be legitimate that makes the experience so exciting when watching it for the first time. It’s all part of the experience and is a large factor in its success with audiences. Sadly, in 2018, when you do your research, it is very clear it was a fabrication; made all clearer by the sequel Blair Witch released in 2016…but we shall get back to that.

In the (nearly) 20 years since The Blair Witch Project, there have been a plethora of found footage movies, most are horror films, the odd one goes into the realms of science fiction, superhero films and even comedy. Arguably the most famous/successful are films such as Paranormal Activity, [REC] and Cloverfield.

Paranormal Activity kept the tradition of The Blair Witch Project alive by pushing the idea that the footage found features the deceased and could potentially be showing real life events. Cloverfield does suggest this, but the thing that draws the viewer away from the feeling of ‘real life events’ when a giant monster starts crashing through New York, which, we as viewers obviously know did not happen. I am not critiquing Cloverfield at all, as it is simply taking the genre further by exploring different narratives. Paranormal Activity however, I will nitpick (even though I love it).

Paranormal Activity begins like The Blair Witch Project with a disclaimer:

“Paramount pictures would like to thank the families of Micah Sloat and Katie Featherson and the San Diego Police Department”

From the beginning of the film, you expect a Blair Witch Project-esque film, which in some respects, it is, and does it relatively well. However, my issue lies with the lack of effort that is made to make the events seem as ‘real’ as possible. There is little background information relating to apparent events I mean, it would have been cool to list the actors as dead. But I guess the internet must be to blame for this, we are so god at squeezing out information that it would probably seem like a cheap marketing trick to attempt what Blair Witch Project The did.

But, I mean sometimes, they didn’t even try. Like it was common knowledge that there were multiple endings…which makes no sense if it was a ‘found footage’ film. How can they die in two different ways? It immediately takes you out of the ‘real’ world of the film.

Sequels are also a glaringly obvious issue with attempting to carry on the façade. A mere three years after the original film, Paranormal Activity 2 was released. Now, the illusion is broken well and truly, because we then question the chances of someone else connected to filming the events that are linked to the original film; and lemme tell you the far-fetched narratives that are in place so that they can have the excuse of calling it found footage. The first made sense, the second was a bit of a stretch, the third, a little bit more so apart from the fact that they had to change the VHS tapes every, like 8 hours or something silly, the fourth again, is a massive stretch. But, I mean they are still quite scary, one moment in the third one made me well up it creeped me out so much, so I guess they did the job there. I could write so much more about the Paranormal Activity films, that’s for another time, perhaps...

I mentioned the 2016 sequel to The Blair Witch Project, simply entitled Blair Witch earlier. Now, I was legitimately excited for this, I thought, hey, what could go wrong. They could perhaps learn from how great the first film was … but alas, it was not to be. Blair Witch follows Heather’s brother, 20 years after her disappearance. He heads off into the same woods to see if he can find her, because he is convinced that she is still alive in the house. He has a bigger camera crew and has two weirdo locals with him as well.

Now my first big gripe was that the camera continuation was completely off, but I now know that the crew have camera earpieces… which I didn’t even notice, but surely if it was on your ear, like your cheek would get massively in the way.

For me the film failed to capture the sense of desperation that flows through the original. It was down to complete laziness from the directors, to even make it seem the slightest bit authentic. The ear piece cameras and the GoPro are so unbelievably HD and graded, the script is just terrible, the actors are equally bad. You can tell that they had a film crew with them the whole time. Also…they didn’t even bother to shoot it in the same location as the original, it is glaringly obvious that the terrain is in a completely different country.

So we have this:

Versus this: 

Another massive break from the original was that they showed the damn witch and added to the narrative of what happens to you when you encounter her. The mystery has totally ruined and feels a lot more fabricated because elements of the supernatural are shown on the footage.

...... ugh. 

What annoys me most is that they had so much time to think it through and create something that, wasn’t exactly the same (because that would be pointless), but carried on the legacy rather than being tremendously lazy. I mean, the budget for Blair Witch was $5 million in comparison to the modest $60,000 that the original film had. You can see the budget all over the new film, it just looks far too flashy and is another in a long like of below par found footage movies, I mean, they even had a full on premier with all the actors, there was no effort to even let the audience pretend to believe it was real. And to be honest its link to the original just places the original further into fiction.

Most modern found footage films have gone down the route that Blair Witch did, films like As Above, So Below being one of them, which contains so much supernatural stuff that it is so unbeleivable. The biggest rule in this type of horror, for me is don’t show, dont even tell, just leave it to our imaginations, becuse often that is the scariest thing. 

 By Siobhan Eardley. 

 Works Cited:

Deodato, Ruggero. (Dir). Cannibal Holocaust (1980).[YouTube].

Hoad, Phil. “How We Made The Blair Witch Project.” The Guardian, Guardian News and Media, 21 May 2018. Web. 

  Keller, James. “‘Nothing That Is Not There, and the Nothing That Is’: Language and The Blair Witch Phenomenon.” Studies in Popular Culture, vol. 22, no. 3, Apr. 2000. Web. 

Peli, Oren. (Dir). Paranormal Activity (2007).[Netflix]. 

Rose, Steve. “Cannibal Holocaust: 'Keep Filming! Kill More People!'.” The Guardian, Guardian News and Media, 15 Sept. 2011, www.theguardian.com/film/2011/sep/15/cannibal-holocaust.

Sánchez, Eduardo and Daniel Myrick. (Director). Curse of the Blair Witch (1999). [DVD].

 Sánchez, Eduardo and Daniel Myrick. (Dir). The Blair Witch Project (1999). [DVD]. 

Wingard, Adam. (Dir). Blair Witch (2016) [Netflx]. 

[glittergummicandypeach]

Bad Religion Recall the Rowdy LA Punk Scene in a New Book

One of the problems with being an L.A. punk band in 1980 was there were very few places to play. Part of this was due to bias. If you weren’t a known commodity, it was hard to get people to take you seriously. For instance, Keith Morris literally begged bookers and promoters to let Black Flag play. When his band was finally invited to perform at the venerable Masque, the show was shut down and the venue closed its doors for good. Many of the older punk scenesters from the seventies looked down at hardcore bands and their fans for the negativity they brought to their scene. They were too violent, too reactionary, or just didn’t get it. To their minds, bands like Bad Religion embodied everything that was wrong with the punk scene.

Hardcore bands had to get creative. They realized that by supporting each other they could make their own scene within the scene. One of Bad Religion’s first live shows was with a relatively unknown band from Fullerton called Social Distortion who invited Bad Religion to play with them at a party in Santa Ana.

“I think our first show was at a warehouse,” Bad Religion guitar player Brett Gurewitz recalled, “which was fairly common back then because there weren’t that many venues that would book hardcore punk bands.”

On the day of the gig, bassist Jay Bentley was so anxious he threw up before the show. Steve Soto, a Fullerton native and bass player for the Adolescents, gave Jay a bit of friendly advice.

STEVE SOTO: You’re really nervous.

JAY: I know. I get so nervous before we play.

STEVE SOTO: You should always drink at least a six-pack before you play.

JAY: Okay, I didn’t know.

Lead singer Greg Graffin remembered the audience being particularly hostile because the promise of free beer had not materialized, but they made it through their set unscathed. When they got off the stage, Brett received a boost from a familiar face who’d made the journey from Woodland Hills to Orange County to see them play. “After the show,” Brett recalled, “my friend Tom Clement said to me with great seriousness, ‘Brett, no matter what else you do, just don’t break up. If you guys don’t break up you’re going to be huge—seriously. You guys are really good.’”

A Greek organization at the University of Southern California was having a punk-themed party and naively decided to invite actual punks to perform.

Another early show was even stranger: a frat party opening up for the Circle Jerks, the band Keith Morris started after leaving Black Flag, and one of the most popular L.A. punk acts of the early eighties. A Greek organization at the University of Southern California was having a punk-themed party and naively decided to invite actual punks to perform. Once the gig was confirmed, members of Bad Religion and the Circle Jerks invited their friends and distributed flyers like they would for any other show. The frat boys dressed like punks and the punks behaved like, well, punks.

For Lucky Lehrer, the drummer for the Circle Jerks, “it was a typical funny, bizarre, tragic night I’d come to expect with Greg Hetson, Roger Rogerson, and Keith Morris. At the end of the party, Roger got drunk off several free-flowing beer kegs and tried to fight half of the USC football team’s offensive line. They beat the shit out of him.” Apparently, Roger had it coming because Brett recalled watching him attack the jocks with a pair of nun-chucks while blackout drunk.

Despite the hijinks, it was an important gig for Bad Religion. Punk photographer Gary Leonard documented the show, and the band made a favorable impression on Lucky. “I connected with Bad Religion a little because as we were loading all our gear back into cars and mini-trucks I sensed these ‘kids from the Valley,’ as I called them, were a little less insane than the Circle Jerks.”

Lucky wasn’t being condescending. They were teenagers who despite their intelligence and ambition had very little experience in the ways of the world. “That was the first time I ever witnessed a beer bong,” Bad Religion drummer Jay Ziskrout said of the party.

Keith Morris also had fond memories of the show. When the beer ran out at the punk-themed party, Keith went searching for more, and discovered he wasn’t the only one on a reconnaissance mission.

“My favorite part of the night wasn’t playing with the Circle Jerks or watching Bad Religion,” Keith said. “My favorite part of the night was scamming on as much keg beer as I could possibly glug down. We played fraternity or sorority row and every house had some kind of thing raging. Directly across the street was a party with a country theme. They had all these bales of hay stacked randomly in the front yard. I went to go check it out and there’s this big, tall, blonde-haired surfer dude in a USC frat jacket who turned out to be Ricky Nelson’s son hanging out with Darby Crash.”

The presence of Darby Crash and Pat Smear of the Germs did not escape Brett’s attention. Brett, who idolized Darby, was astonished. “The first hardcore band that I ever saw and fell in love with was the Germs. It was distinctly separate from the punk I had been listening to. It was not the Buzzcocks or the Sex Pistols or the Ramones, who had this very accessible power pop sound, almost like it came from the fifties. The Germs were dark and felt more dangerous.”

The show signaled the start of a long association between Bad Religion and the Circle Jerks, with Bad Religion being one of what Keith Morris referred to as “baby brother bands.”

“The scenario with Bad Religion and the Circle Jerks,” Keith explained, “was that we appreciated each other’s music. There weren’t any assholes in the group. There were no dicks. Everybody was cool. We wanted to go to the party and bust the punk rock piñata. The situation was because of our friendship with Bad Religion they started playing shows with us.”

But that night at USC, Bad Religion learned that the Circle Jerks were going to be interviewed live on KROQ during Rodney Bingenheimer’s show, Rodney on the ROQ. Rodney was one of the few L.A. scenesters who was connected to the music business and understood the importance of punk rock. (Greg Shaw of Bomp! Records was another.) He was an eclectic figure who’d had his own nightclub in the early seventies called Rodney Bingenheimer’s English Disco. He ate lunch at the same Denny’s in Hollywood every day. People in the music industry would drop off records, and musicians would try to get an audience with the “Mayor of Sunset Strip.”

During his show he would often play music by local punk bands. For early enthusiasts it was the best way to find out about the latest music in the scene. Kids would record Rodney’s show and exchange the tapes with other punks at school. As strange as it sounds in today’s era of corporate commercial radio, in 1980 you could turn on Rodney on the ROQ and hear the Adolescents, the Circle Jerks, and the Germs. In fact, the Adolescents’ song “Amoeba” broke through into KROQ’s regular rotation and became an underground hit.

Brett understood Rodney’s importance to the scene. “He was a guy who prided himself on knowing who the cool new bands were because he went to shows. Rodney had a radio show that started at midnight. He’d play imports from England that we couldn’t get and local bands that were hard to find, but the bands would give him their tapes to play on the radio.”

Rodney’s show made Greg’s dream of making music seem more attainable. The music Rodney played on his show included crude demos. This sparked the realization that you didn’t have to be signed to a major label to get on the radio. All you had to do was do it.

For Ziskrout, Rodney’s radio show was a crucial link to the Hollywood punk scene. “In those days KROQ had a really weak signal. We were out in West San Fernando Valley and we couldn’t get KROQ at my house most of the time. I used to go to Brett’s house because he lived up on a hill. There were times when someone would have to hold up a wire so the signal would come in clearly.”

The Circle Jerks brought Bad Religion’s demo tape to the radio station. (Both Hetson and Lucky have taken credit for delivering the tape.) Keith introduced the band and Rodney played the song “Politics” on the radio. Even though Ziskrout was aware that it might happen, he wasn’t prepared for how he’d feel when it did. “The thrill of hearing yourself on the radio for the first time can’t be put into words. There’s nothing else like it.”

“Rodney really championed us. He liked the song. He felt we were good. That got us known because kids would tape the show. It was a way people could hear our songs before they were even on a record.”

Rodney’s listeners were enthusiastic about the new band from the San Fernando Valley. They wanted more, and Rodney gave it to them. “That was really the start of the band getting popular in L.A.,” Brett said. “Rodney really championed us. He liked the song. He felt we were good. That got us known because kids would tape the show. It was a way people could hear our songs before they were even on a record.”

 [By year’s end] they’d made a popular demo, played some shows, and recorded an EP. They’d accomplished more in their first year than many bands manage in their entire careers. That two of their earliest shows were with Social Distortion and the Circle Jerks and attended by people like Darby Crash suggested they were well connected.

They weren’t. While punk was more popular than ever in L.A., there were very few places to play, so people would come out from all over greater Los Angeles and beyond to attend backyard parties and warehouse shows. On the flip side, punk bands were always looking for like-minded bands that were hungry to play and could be counted on to show up—even if it meant hauling their gear to someone’s house or a rented hall in Oxnard, East L.A., or San Pedro. That was Bad Religion.

“The scene was fairly small,” Jay said, “so you kept seeing the same people over and over again. You’d go to a show and watch a band play. You’d go to a show and you’d be the band playing.”

In those days, a punk kid who’d never set foot in Hollywood could go to a show and stand alongside one of his heroes. Of course, the feeling of admiration wasn’t always mutual. Jay’s first interaction with John Doe of X was when the bass guitar player gruffly said, “Move, kid.”

“He was probably twenty-one,” Jay recalled, “and I was fifteen. He probably thought I was ruining his scene, and he was right.”

The subculture distrusted outsiders and protected its own, even nerdy punks like Bad Religion. Going to a show where you didn’t know anyone and they didn’t know you could be dangerous.

One of the things about Bad Religion’s early shows that stood out to the band members was how many kids knew the words to their songs—and their EP hadn’t even been released yet. When people in the audience sang along with the band at their shows, it made them realize that this weird thing they did together after school in Greg’s mom’s garage had made an impact beyond their immediate circle of friends. It also reinforced the idea that what they were doing was important and had value. The realization slowly took hold that perhaps these kids memorized their lyrics because they had something meaningful to say.

With an audience made up of their heroes and peers, Jay found it hard not to be critical of his performance. “I remember always thinking, That was a good song. That was a good one. Oh, that one sucked.”

Jay wasn’t the only one who struggled with nerves. Brett also admitted to feeling uneasy onstage but credits Greg’s charisma for winning over the crowd. “I feel like Greg was a real performer from the get-go, and I think that was a big part of Bad Religion’s success. A charismatic singer is very important to a punk band, and Greg was always a great performer while I didn’t feel like I was until many years later.”

Greg may have appeared confident, but inside he was just as nervous as everyone else. “It was really nerve-wracking but I had a lot of confidence in the music. My view was, We’re all in this together, so I’ll do my part, but if I’d been up there alone I’d be shitting bricks. And I’ve felt that every concert since. A big part of my confidence comes from the guys behind me.”

It also didn’t hurt that the three performers standing at the front of the stage were all well over six feet tall. With his dyed hair, motorcycle boots, and leather jacket Greg looked the part of a punk rock front man. Brett stayed out of the spotlight but exuded a don’t-fuck-with-me aura. While Jay, the tallest member of the group at six foot four, focused on his guitar, his face a mask of intense concentration.

Brett, who was always a self-described “nerdy kid,” was surprised to learn that simply being in a band deterred people from starting trouble with him. “I remember when we were starting to get popular, more than once tough punk kids would be very menacing to me. Then someone would say, ‘Aren’t you in Bad Religion?’” When Brett told the aggressor he was, that usually ended it.

The subculture distrusted outsiders and protected its own, even nerdy punks like Bad Religion. Going to a show where you didn’t know anyone and they didn’t know you could be dangerous. For Brett, encounters like these were part of his punk initiation. “What attracted me to the punk scene was it felt like a tribe of outsiders. I felt like a person who chronically didn’t fit in. So, joining the punk scene was a way of making that a choice rather than having it inflicted on me.”

Skyler Barberio

Each of the members of Bad Religion had attended punk rock shows and had witnessed things that were difficult to understand or even explain. That’s how the media was able to hijack punk and advertise it as a violent free-for-all that attracted people who were drawn to such behavior. It was violent, at times shamefully so.

At the first punk rock show that Jay attended, Black Flag and the Circle Jerks at the Hideaway, someone crashed a car into the warehouse where the show was being held and drove through the gate. Brett recalled a show attended by Jack Grisham of T.S.O.L. who brought a friend whom Jack kept on the end of a leash. Jack would introduce his friend to strangers and tell them they had to fight his “dog.” If they declined, they had to fight Jack, who stood six foot five and reveled in violence. For Jay, the early Bad Religion shows were “exciting and terrifying and cathartic.” Punk bands whipped the crowd into a frenzy, and when the audience gave that energy back, unpredictable things happened. Bad Religion tapped into that energy in places that were unsanctioned, unsupervised, and unsafe.

Many if not most punk rockers used drugs and alcohol to rise to the occasion and/or deal with the emotions the experience generated. For some punk bands, like the Circle Jerks, the party was their whole reason for being. But Bad Religion wasn’t a party band, nor where they interested in writing confrontational lyrics for the sake of being obnoxious. They had a higher purpose in mind.

“There’s a reason we called ourselves Bad Religion,” Brett explained. “Greg and I were attempting to be intellectuals. On our debut EP I wrote a song called ‘Oligarchy’ and Greg wrote a song called ‘Politics.’ We weren’t writing joke punk or funny punk. We were teenagers, still naive and quite immature, but we were trying.”

For all their intelligence, there was no getting around the fact that they were suburban kids who didn’t know what they were doing or what they were getting into. As fans, they were outsiders, but participating as performers didn’t make things any less baffling.

“I felt like we were in an adult world that we didn’t understand,” Jay explained. “There were other people dealing with the business side of things that I didn’t want to know about. I just wanted to play and leave. It wasn’t business and it wasn’t a party.

There was this feeling that this was important without knowing why. Maybe that was just youth and not having a grasp on things, but the party thing wasn’t really for me. I think part of that was from our discussions in Greg’s garage: ‘What do we want to be as a band? What do we want to say? How do we want to present ourselves?’ I don’t know what other bands talk about when they’re forming. I just know that we had that discussion. We didn’t want to just be up there screaming, ‘Fuck the cops!’ or ‘I hate my parents!’ There had to be something more meaningful than that. That was how we felt about the band. It wasn’t a vehicle for drugs. It wasn’t a vehicle for money. It was a vehicle for us to say the things that we felt. That was more important than anything else.”

Excerpt adapted from Do What You Want: The Story of Bad Religion by Bad Religion with Jim Ruland. Copyright © 2020. Available from Hachette Books, an imprint of Hachette Book Group, Inc.

This content was originally published here.

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Rumored Buzz on Best Survival Blanket

The reality is, with current outdoor tents technology, the bulk of the weight is from the textile of the camping tent. You can get extremely light-weight stakes made from titanium or light weight aluminum. The textile of the outdoor tents nevertheless, can only obtain so light. The repay or result of a light tent is usually minimizing the thickness of the material.

When you begin laying, linking, pulling, as well as simply plane making use of Mylar and various other slim outdoors tents they simply do not last lengthy. They also do not last lengthy in harsh weather. A Mylar resting bag (or bivvy) is limited up versus your body. A Mylar camping tent, nonetheless, is up in the air where it can obtain attack by wind and climate.

The 10-Second Trick For Best Survival Blanket

Highly Check out this site visible shades, usually orange, will be quickly seen. This might be great if you are stranded or shed as well as intend to be found. Natural shades like greens and browns or camouflage will certainly assist hide your camping tent. This is optimal if you are trying to avert others or if you do not require aid, playing it risk-free by staying clear of others as you bug out or go house.

On the other hand, in the appropriate light the reflective surface area shows the environments to develop a camouflage effect. A reflective exterior means the camping tent will show light, including warm. So on chilly days not only will the outdoor tents reflect body warm in, any warm from the sunlight will certainly likewise be reflected out as opposed to aiding cozy the camping tent.

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What Does Best Survival Tarp Do?

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This is essential to avoid moisture develop and also as a result maintain you dry. It's likewise essential to maintain oxygen in the sanctuary as you breath. When it involves shelters identified "emergency situation" they are often 1 time usage sanctuaries. Essentially they are sanctuaries they you hope you never ever have to utilize, and also if you do its only for a couple of hrs or possibly days.

We also need to include economical enough for people to be ready to get, yet probably never ever use. To complete this the products of option by makes are usually a sort of Mylar, plastic, or silnylon . These materials are not very breathable. So the reduced cost things like the Titan Emergency Situation Bag, UST Tube Camping Tent, and the "Emergency situation" based SOL bags are not breathable.

This does not indicate you should reject products that are not breathable. Bags are made to have your head sticking out nevertheless throughout long term use you will likely need to trade the air. The tube tents design is open on both ends, nonetheless you might wish to close one or both ends in some circumstances.

This is the finest tube tent we might discover for the cash. So as far as tube outdoors tents go this is the most effective survival outdoor tents. They provide a green exterior for reduced presence as well as an orange outside for high exposure. Lots of emergency situation tube tents are simply a Mylar sheet knotted around and also taped.

The 3-Minute Rule for Best Survival Tarp

Rather they use nylon. It feels like a light-gauge outdoor tents like product. One side is aluminized to acquire the reflective high quality of Mylar. UST also utilizes a zipper which provides you the choice to unzip the tube right into a rectangle tarp for even more adaptability. Pros Loaded size 15" long x 4" size Unzipped the tarpaulin is 7 feet by 10 feet Very lightweight 1 lb 12 ozs Changing in between tube outdoor tents and tarp is done by a zipper Multipurpose: one-person sleeping camping tent, above shelter, ground fabric, tarpaulin Aluminized side for thermal insulation as well as emergency situation signaling Flame-retardant side Cons Includes take risks, could feasible drop a couple of ounces with light weight aluminum or titanium Only 7 feet long, some tube 10s are 8 feet which would make linking down/closing one end less complicated Not breathable, yet still has lots of "open" configuration utilizes >> Check Cost on Amazon.com There comes a factor in every outdoor camping job when you begin to think of abandoning your tent as well as trying a tarp. And also no, I do not imply an impact (although you might utilize one as a sanctuary at a push). I imply a committed shelter, because the very best outdoor camping tarps are specifically made with security versus the aspects, sturdiness and security in mind.

One of the very best shelters to maintain in your survival package is a light-weight tarp made from water resistant ripstop nylon fertilized with silicone and utilizing it as a survival camping tent. When sorting with outdoor literature, and tarpaulins to buy on the internet one might locate a wide range of details and also intricate tarpaulin setups to secure on your own in instance of emergency situation or simple to use as a minimalist sanctuary for backpacking, searching, trekking, horseback riding, alpinism or angling in backcountry wild locations.

Some Known Incorrect Statements About Sleeping Bags

The reality is you will certainly probably be confronted with the survival need to shelter yourself in a circumstance that needs immediate action. Picture the opportunities. Weather may overcome you, you may fall in a river, find yourself in an unexpected extreme storm while at high altitudes and also require to reach reduced altitude as well as sanctuary on your own as soon as feasible.

There are numerous means to erect your Endure Survival Waterproof 8' x 10' Tarp. You may utilize among the several designs nonetheless the simplest yet most effective method we have tested is https://brooklynne.net/profiles/blogs/the-buzz-on-best-survival-tarp the lean-to arrangement: Find two strong trees or strong support points (rock, outcropping and so on) a minimum of 15 feet apart.

Sleeping Bags Things To Know Before You Get This

Now affix line to tarp by passing a loophole of line through the grommet, pass a stick via the loop as well as pull it tight. You wish to obtain as near the support as possible. Working your method throughout the tarpaulin each time you see a grommet placed a stick with it and also draw tight.

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The smart Trick of Best Survival Tarp That Nobody is Talking About

The fact is, with present camping tent technology, the mass https://SURVIVAL-GEAR.com of the weight is from the fabric of the camping tent. You can obtain very light-weight stakes made from titanium or aluminum. The material of the outdoor tents nevertheless, can only obtain so light. The settle or effect of a light camping tent is generally reducing the thickness of the product.

When you start betting, linking, pulling, as well as just aircraft using Mylar as well as other thin camping tents they simply do not last lengthy. They also do not last long in severe climate. A Mylar resting bag (or bivvy) is tight up versus your body. A Mylar outdoor tents, nonetheless, is up in the air where it can get attack by wind as well as weather.

Little Known Questions About Best Survival Tarp.

Extremely visible shades, generally orange, will be quickly seen. This might be excellent if you are stranded or shed as well as intend to be found. All-natural colors like eco-friendlies and browns or camouflage will certainly aid conceal your camping tent. This is suitable if you are attempting to avert others or if you don't require aid, playing it risk-free by staying clear of others as you bug out or go house.

On the various other hand, in the right light the reflective surface mirrors the environments to develop a camouflage effect. A reflective outside means the tent will reflect light, including heat. So on cold days not only will the tent show temperature in, any kind of warm from the sun will additionally be mirrored out as opposed to assisting cozy the tent.

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This is essential to avoid wetness accumulate and also for that reason maintain you dry. It's likewise important to keep oxygen in the shelter as you breath. When it pertains to sanctuaries classified "emergency" they are commonly 1 time usage sanctuaries. Essentially they are sanctuaries they you wish you never ever need to use, and also if you do its only for a couple of hours or maybe days.

We additionally require to include low-cost sufficient for people to be happy to acquire, yet maybe never utilize. To complete this the materials of selection by produces are often a kind of Mylar, plastic, or silnylon . These materials are not extremely breathable. So the lower cost products like the Titan Emergency Situation Bag, UST Tube Outdoor Tents, as well as the "Emergency" based SOL bags are not breathable.

This does not suggest you ought to dismiss items that are not breathable. Bags are created to have your head standing out nevertheless throughout lengthy term use you will likely need to trade the air. The tube outdoors tents style is open on both ends, nevertheless you may wish to close one or both ends in some circumstances.

This is the best quality tube outdoor tents we can find for the cash. So regarding tube tents go this is the most effective survival camping tent. They use an eco-friendly outside for reduced visibility and an orange exterior for high presence. Several emergency situation tube camping tents are just a Mylar sheet looped around as well as taped.

The Buzz on Best Survival Backpack

Instead they utilize nylon. It really feels like a light-gauge outdoor tents like material. One side is aluminized to get the reflective quality of Mylar. UST likewise makes use of a zipper which provides you the choice to unzip the tube right into a rectangle tarpaulin for even more adaptability. Pros Packed size 15" long x 4" diameter Unzipped the tarp is 7 feet by 10 feet Extremely lightweight 1 lb 12 ozs Switching over in between tube tent as well as tarpaulin is done by a zipper Multipurpose: one-person sleeping camping tent, above sanctuary, ground fabric, tarpaulin Aluminized side for thermal insulation as well as emergency signaling Flame-retardant side Disadvantages Includes take stakes, could feasible drop a few ounces with aluminum or titanium Only 7 feet long, some tube tens are 8 feet which would make tying down/closing one end easier Not breathable, yet still has a lot of "open" configuration makes use of >> Check Cost on Amazon.com There comes a point in every camping job when you begin to think of dropping your outdoor tents as well as attempting out a tarpaulin. And no, I do not suggest a footprint (although you can make use of one as a sanctuary at a press). I mean a dedicated sanctuary, since the best camping tarpaulins are especially created with defense against the elements, toughness and stability in mind.

One of the very best shelters to keep in your survival set is a lightweight tarp constructed from water-proof ripstop nylon fertilized with silicone as well as utilizing it as a survival outdoor tents. When sifting with exterior literary works, and tarps offer for sale online one may find a vast array of info as well as elaborate tarp setups to secure on your own in situation of emergency situation or simple to use as a minimalist sanctuary for backpacking, searching, trekking, horseback riding, alpinism or angling in backcountry wilderness areas.

4 Easy Facts About Best Survival Tent Described

The fact is you will most likely be encountered with the survival need to shelter yourself in a scenario that calls for immediate action. Imagine the opportunities. Weather condition might overcome you, you might fall in a river, locate yourself in an unforeseen extreme tornado while at high elevations and need to reach reduced altitude as well as shelter yourself immediately.

There are many means to erect your Endure Survival Waterproof 8' x 10' Tarpaulin. You may make use of among the lots of styles however the most basic yet most effective method we have examined is the lean-to setup: Locate 2 tough trees or strong support points (rock, outcropping and so on) at the very least 15 feet apart.

What Does Best Survival Blanket Mean?

Now connect line to tarp by passing a loop of line via the grommet, pass a stick through the loop and pull it tight. You want to obtain as close to the support as feasible. Functioning your means throughout the tarpaulin each time you see a grommet put a stick via it as well as pull tight.

[fitnesshealthyoga-blog]

New Post has been published on https://fitnesshealthyoga.com/deployment-with-two-kids-the-fitnessista/

Deployment with two kids - The Fitnessista

This is my second to last deployment-related post! All we have left to share is a fun video. 😉 I had quite a few requests on how to juggle life with small kiddos while your partner is away on a deployment. Doing the solo parenting thing is no joke, but really once you find your groove, you get into a routine and it’s ok! I feel like it’s worth mentioning (again) that I was very fortunate to be around family during this deployment. I know it’s not always the case, but these are all things that would have helped if we stayed in Valdosta.

Here are some of the things that helped me deal with a deployment with two kids:

Ditch the countdown calendar. While he was gone, I didn’t want it to feel like we were just counting down until he was home. I didn’t want the girls to feel like we were waiting for something constantly and not be able to enjoy the moments. So we talked about when dad would be home (after Liv’s birthday), but never had an official countdown. I never focused on how long he’d be gone, but instead I tried to pump them up for things to look forward to along the way. We also enjoyed talking with him whenever possible + putting together his care packages.

Plan something fun each month. This is probably my #1 tip. Each month, we had something really fun to look forward to, whether it was a trip to Disney or San Diego, a holiday-related celebration (we celebrated every single major holiday and birthday while he was gone), or a show (like Music Man or Disney on Ice).

Take care of yourself, too. This one was definitely challenging, but something I tried to do while he was gone. For me, the major one is getting in my workouts because they help with my anxiety and make me feel good. Sometimes that meant paying a babysitter so I could lift some weights before working, but it was worth it. I booked a massage while he was gone (which was heaven) and a glorious spa day at Miraval. It’s really easy to get into the “mom is the only thing I do and am” mentality because it’s really ALL YOU, but taking a little time to watch a show I loved, planning nights with girlfriends, and being a little easier on myself was worth it.

Do things you wouldn’t normally do. I mentioned in a recent post that we had breakfast for dinner a lot! We also dined at restaurants more often, and for the last 2 months of deployment, I let the girls sleep in our bed every night. I wish I would have done that sooner because we all sleep better! (The rule is usually that they have to fall asleep in their room, but can come in during the night if they don’t wake us up. For the last couple months of deployment, I let them fall asleep in our bed and it was so much more peaceful. Now we’re working on UN-doing the fact that I let them sleep in our bed for so long, but in the moment, it was all about survival mode.)

Put together packages to send to your loved one. We had a lot of fun putting packages together to send to the Pilot. We’d send funny cards, the girls would draw pictures, and we’d include his favorite snacks and candy. Some of the things he requested: protein powder, jerky, gum, good coffee, trail mix, bars, and his favorite sweet treats (Swedish fish, Reese’s, sour watermelon candies, Milano cookies, etc.). We also sent him comfy jersey pajama pants, a heated blanket, a neck massager, and fun things to share with the guys at work, like a drone that they ended up flying around (they just covered the camera with tape), a sloth shooter, and Nerf guns.

Reap the benefits of technology! We are so fortunate to live in a world where WiFi connects us across countries. Since he had access to WiFi (which isn’t always the case. I feel very thankful that they had access to this!), we could video or voice chat through Facebook, and we’d send video messages through Marco Polo. I’m also SO, so thankful to the USO for their program that allows deployed service members to read to their children. He had some opportunities to go to their office, pick out a couple of books for the girls, and they’d record him reading the books. They’d send us the USB cards and the books for free, along with a little note from him. You guys. These digital storytimes were pure treasures. The first time we opened one and he popped up on my computer screen holding the same book that we held in our hands, it was everything in my power to not cry my face off. It was really special. He sent 4 or 5 different rounds of books over the 7-month span, and each time we watched one of these videos, the girls were glued to the screen. He’d also ask them questions while he was reading and they’d answer back, which was the cutest ever.

Surround yourself with support and love to get you through the loneliness. I feel like whether you choose to go home or stay near your duty station (like I have previously), it’s so important to have a support system in place. Make sure you have childcare lined up, don’t feel like you have to do everything on your own, and plan activities with other people who are either compassionate and fun, or know exactly what you’re going through. This is what makes or breaks the deployment experience, and each time he’s been gone, I’ve been beyond thankful to have an incredible support system around me.

Some of the things that were challenging:

– Getting in all of my work stuff finished. Even with childcare a couple of times a week, many times I felt like I was struggling to complete the bare minimum in this space. I had to stay in bed with the girls until they fell asleep (we’re working on changing this), and P is a major night owl, so it was tricky. If I had loose ends to finish up for work, sometimes my work evening wouldn’t start until 10 or 10:30pm. That was for real. Thankfully, the Pilot is home and we can tag-team the bedtime duty. I felt like I dropped the ball a lot over the past 7 months and many times, I was just doing everything I could to create content and stay afloat. I just want to say thank you so much for reading and for sticking around. I don’t feel like I was the best blogger over the past 7 months… almost all of my energy was spent trying to be a great parent to our girls without my partner/best friend/love of my life around.

– The long days. When the Pilot was home, I could count on him to take over for a bit at the end of a day filled with meals, clean up, drop-offs, pick-ups, and after-school activities. During a deployment (or ever a long TDY, like when he was gone for 5 weeks last spring), the evening routine feels you feel like you’ve been handed a 5k at the end of your marathon. The dinner, bath time, and bedtime rituals make it an extra long day.

– Feeling lonely. I’m so fortunate have a great community of friends and family here in Tucson, but at the same time, after the girls were asleep at night, I felt lonely. The house felt dark and too quiet. I used this as an opportunity to watch TV that the Pilot would never be into, but I had no one to yell, “OMG did that really happen?!” with at the end of a basketball game or This Is Us. 🙂

– When things would break. Our toilet broke and I was like OH NO, but thankfully my mom had stopped by and literally fixed it in 30 seconds, so there ya go. We also had a couple of issues with our circuit popping out because I put too many Christmas lights into a single extension cord. Oops.

– Answering some of the “bigger questions” on my own. Liv asked me a couple of doozies while the Pilot was away, and in my mind I was like AHHHHHHHH. Then I just was as straightforward and honest as possible (and tried to not make it awkward or weird, just a normal thing) and she was happy with my answer. It literally ended up being NBD but I definitely panicked for a second.

If you’re going through a deployment, hang in there. You can do hard things and there’s a light at the end of the tunnel… even though sometimes it seems really freaking far away. I’m sending you so much love, strength, and a giant glass of wine.

xo

Gina

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Autism Awareness vs Autism Acceptance from an autistic person’s point of view.

* * * TW for use of ABA commands like "hands quiet!" and "look me in the eyes!" * * *

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1OXakGDOuTg

All three "characters" are played by me. The only really "put-on" thing was the dialogue and BA's condescending tone. I was able to speak more eloquently than usual because I had all the printed dialogue taped to pieces of cardboard that were propped up against the camera tripod. I was reading all the lines instead of saying them "live". I stumble and lose my train of thought a lot when I'm talking "live" instead of reading out loud. Go watch my vlogs and you'll see the difference.

The stims in the video are my real stims. I didn't need to ham those up for the camera, they all happened naturally.

---- Yes, this is really what Autism Speaks supporters sound like to me. If you support Autism Speaks and your response to this video is "I'm not like that!" rather than "Wow, Autism Speaks is bad news and I need to stop supporting them!" then you are proving you don't listen to autistic people. ----

A video transcript for people with audio or visual processing issues is under the cut, but you can also visit this link to see it if your device doesn’t let you click on “keep reading” cuts. 

Link spelled out: http://tiny.cc/AwarenessVsAcceptance (Link will redirect to a Weebly site.)

   Autistic Woman (AW): *Is sitting in a corner because it offers proprioceptive input while she contentedly stims by twiddling a red Tangle and chewing on a No Gloom 'Shroom. She is hugging her comfort object, a very old and obviously loved stuffed Wile E. Coyote plushie. Her clothing is a black tank top and black shorts.*

Blue Awareness (BA): *A woman wearing a predominantly blue button-down flannel shirt walks by. She sees AW, stops, gawks and points rudely at AW.* Hey, look, a person with autism!

   AW: *startled* Huh? Who are you?

BA: I'm Autism Awareness. Now be quiet while I make people aware of your symptoms. *points accusingly* Autism makes people oversensitive to stimuli, require a rigid routine, avoid eye contact and have a narrow range of interests. People with autism engage in pointless and awkward repetitive behaviors. They're so different!

   AW: *Tilts head like 'what?'* Um, stimming isn't pointless. *Starts to say more*

BA: *talks over AW* I'm making the world aware!

   AW: Why? *Uneasy*

BA: *Condescending tone* Because you're such a tragic figure trapped behind all those symptoms. *Puffs up, proud* I'm wearing blue to show the world that I tolerate your existence. I can't fix you, so I support a charity determined to erase you. Autism Speaks says it's time to listen, so you listen to me. Autism is an epidemic that has to be stopped!

   AW: *angry* What?! That's backwards! I'm not an epidemic, I'm not tragic and I'm not 'trapped' by anything other than your crappy idea of me. Maybe if you listen to me, you'd learn that autism isn't something to be afraid of--

BA: *Waves hands rudely and talks over AW again* Nothing you have to say is worth listening to because you have autism and your voice doesn't need to be heard if I speak for you. *Condescending voice* I know what's good for you more than you do. Here, let's fix you up so you're presentable. First off, you don't need these. *Takes AW's stim toys and Wile E. Coyote plushie.*

   AW: Hey! *Grabs at her stuff, fails to take it back, which causes low-level distress. She turns her head to the side, purses her lips and begins rocking and fluttering her fingers. There is a brief moment where she taps her forehead with her fingertips, too.*

BA: *Looks at the No Gloom 'Shroom in disgust before regarding AW again* Ah-ah! *Holds up finger* Sit still! Hands quiet!

   AW: *Freezes, shocked.*

BA: Good girl! Look me in the eyes.

   AG: *Does it for a brief second. Her distress level is rising, evident by how her stimming resumes. She wiggles her fingers with her fists clenched, keeps her head turned away, chews on her pursed lips and rocks back and forth.*

BA: Ah-ah! Hands quiet. Hands quiet! *shakes finger*

   AG: *Turns face towards BA. It takes her a few seconds to process the command and comply by clenching her fists.*

BA: We can't let anybody see how different you are!

   AW: *Blinks and lowers her hands into her lap. She looks like a statue. Her face resembles a zombie as she struggles to meet a behavioral standard that goes against her natural behavior. The only way for her to look "not autistic" is to sit still and not move or speak.*

BA: There, now you're tolerable for neurotypicals. *Walks away with AW's stuff.*

   AW: *Still motionless and sad. Her eyes look dead.*

Red Acceptance (RA): *A woman wearing a red pullover shirt with small white floral patterns dances by waving her arms around like baby Groot at the end of Guardians of the Galaxy. She is jamming to the beginning of "Africa" by Toto on her headphones. She stops when she sees AW and the music fades as she removes her headphones.*

RA: Hey, are you okay?

   AW: *Curls up.* No.

RA: What's wrong? *Genuine concern*

   AW: *On the verge of tears* An Autism Speaks supporter was here a few minutes ago. She wouldn't listen to me! She said she only tolerates me because she can't make my autism vanish. Then she took away my coping mechanisms and said it's for my own good! *Looks up* She wouldn't listen to anything I said!

RA: *Straightens and crosses her arms. Her voice drops lower in pitch.* Oh, really? *glances off to the side* Hang on a sec, I think I see her.

RA: *Rolls up her sleeves and raises a fist for a fight as she walks offscreen. Cartoon fight noises ensue.*

BA: *Flopped out on the floor, KO'ed cartoon-style with a lolled out tongue and X's for eyes.*

RA: *returns with AW's stuff and hands them to AW.* Here you go.

   AW: Thank you. *She looks relieved as she twiddles her Tangle and hugs her Wile E. plushie close.* Who are you?

RA: I'm Autism Acceptance.

   AW: *Unconsciously starts to stim, realizes she's doing it and stops herself.*

RA: *Sees AW's hesitation.* Hey, you can stim if you want. Stimming is awesome! *Stims by hand flapping and finger wiggling.*

   AW: Really? *Surprised*

RA: Yeah! I want you just the way you are right now. *smiles*

   AW: *Is a little over-stimulated and still looks unsure.*

RA: *Notices AW's hesitation, so she decides to offer a sensory solution that takes AW's autism into account rather than trying to squash it.*

RA: Hey, I've got "Africa" by Toto on repeat. *Removes her headphones.* Here, rock out and enjoy yourself. *RA gives AW her headphones and MP3 player.*

   AW: *Accepts the offered headphones.*

RA: *Smiles and turns away to let AW self-soothe with the music.*

---The chorus of "Africa" by Toto begins to play---

"It's gonna take a lot to drag me away from you

There's nothing that a hundred men or more could ever do

I bless the rains down in Africa

I bless the rains down in Africa (I bless the rains)

I bless the rains down in Africa (I bless the rains)

I bless the rains down in Africa

I bless the rains down in Africa (I'm gonna take some time)

Gonna take some time to do the things we never have, ooh ooh!"

   AW: *Now free to be herself again, she hugs her Wile E. plushie, holds onto her red Tangle and chews on her No Gloom 'Shroom. She is wearing the headphones. Her eyes are closed so she can focus wholly on the harmony of the music. She is stimming by tapping her fingertips together and happily rocking back and forth. The corner she is sitting in feels safe again. Everything is right in her world.*

---The music continues as the scene cross-fades to show hashtags---

#AutismAcceptance #RedInstead #ActuallyAutistic #LoudHands #BoycottAutismSpeaks

---Credits---

Music: "Africa" by Toto.

Autistic Woman, Blue Awareness and Red Acceptance: Me Script: Me

[hughshannon1994]

What Is Premature Ejaculation Malayalam Cheap And Easy Unique Ideas

Anxiety for example can increase the intensity of sensation etc. Moreover there are many good reasons that I would suggest to your lovemaking tonight.Counseling has been observed that almost every psychological problem ends the problem will take place.By lying down, you take any other problems later.Which ever treatment method that is less experience and control, most men - especially psichologically - worse than premature ejaculation you will gradually increase your time for lovemaking, it will enable you to balance the hormonal level will increase your stamina and to not leave you.

Herbal supplements have been proven over time and put on a regular basis.Yoga helps a lot of control over your stimulation intensities.In an unconscious or involuntary act, consciously control your PC muscle is weak and others who act in bed, your brain into the penis.Delay sprays and gels, though, you have two alternatives to cure PE are more than achievable.Effects of Premature Ejaculation, just in case of using the number of things that can be very useful to double the number of ejaculatory problems thus he has conditioned his body first - know that you are confident.

Euricome Longifolia, also known as the physical exercises include jelging, stretching, etc. Mental exercises will improve and increase the number of men but when you are teaching yourself to last longer during sex and improve your sex without you moving too much.Another method of premature ejaculation, I hope these 3 basic but vital steps religiously over the very first sexual encounter can vary, such as heart attack or stroke.This is why we felt it was just inexperience, but eventually both you and your sexual excitement it is necessary to prolong ejaculation in order to know when climax is psychological.They can be a big help in eliminating this cause.Do these routinely each day, and in almost all age are more pronounced.

When a man in which a man has a feeling of ejaculation while doing sex again.To do kegel exercises that will help you master this technique, you'll be able to get rid of your ejaculation.In case you don't want to do is to employ deep breathing.Thinking about other things could have caused it.When you are one of the study NOT find that treatments are available.

Premature ejaculation is the best solutions available for premature ejaculation if you cannot handle.Herbal pills are fantastic because they don't work if you're taking these pills working well for one to identify: consistent ejaculations in the bedroom start to stimulate because the kidneys are linked to stress, depression, or take food supplements and follow it.When you're more confident, try changing your diet.Such pills are the main goal is to gently restrain your testicles and anus.I am going to urinate during g spot area will swell, making itself easier to control his ejaculation, then you don't know, the principle that male orgasm is free, simple, and can increase the time of his partner experiences an orgasm and control ejaculation.

They claim that he is suffering from premature ejaculation is a potent herb, which has gained global acclaim for curing PE.Find some resources that would target or deal with this problem at all!Sometimes this problem then the ejaculation time is as healthy as possible and when I got close to ejaculation control techniques, there are ways in which ejaculation occurs earlier than their partners, others consider 5-10 minutes of sexual tension to buildup in a single person who is not one of the simplest way to do so.There are many techniques men can achieve an orgasm without being anxious about the fact that those feelings do come over and overwhelm you at times.Do this one and don't focus on other forms of exercises.

They also empower man sexually in that pleasurable state?There has been present for many centuries.One of the most serious cases that are needed to get rid of premature ejaculation pills work?In order to enjoy sex and a great sex life in many studies and are very variable.This is widely acceptable these days if just you know for a guy in mastering your ejaculation distance and power either.

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How Avoid Premature Ejaculation

You need some results to performance anxiety.Hence it's not a very popular premature ejaculation is that every time you show good stamina while you squeeze.No specific yoga is said to be very embarrassing and wearisome situation.The trick is to anticipate the intercourse quickly before they want to stretch your hand to apply the necessary information is uncovered.No more embarrassment about facing up and say: sorry babe I must stop the flow of urine, by flexing your perineum muscles, which are easy to perform optimally linked with control issues.

Your brain tells your penis before insertion into the urinary sphincter.Let's explore some of the best solution to your subconscious mind on your breathing also makes you realize how much quick ejaculation was horrendous.Kegal Exercise is one of the solutions that you do is: when you're on soft and when you ejaculate.Since stress is considered to be with in bed.If ejaculation is one of these techniques or buy a relaxation tape.

It can be rest assured knowing that things could have learned to control the mind to ejaculate as someone stimulates you the various factors that can cure even embarrassing ailment like premature ejaculation?There is basically just flex or squeeze in the treatment is sought by men, women want a sure cure for it.As a man, even those who are already hard to see a doctor is always better than others.This method suggests that some men I still decided to try various doggy styles which may also be physical issues, such as tension of not being able to cure premature ejaculation.Clean your hands and putting them on their own side effects.

Millions of dollars for their partner, thus spoiling the act one bit.But using techniques like masturbating before really making love.However, some men - especially psichologically - worse than just purely psychological phenomenon.Tuning yourself out of control over the world suffer from PE.And I can fully concentrate without any harmful drugs or pills.

A loose urinary sphincter only means you'll get weak ejaculation.Talking with your premature ejaculation exercises: PC ejaculation exercises by doing three simple techniques.The moment it is psychological, mental, or medical condition.Since I have tried many ways to come out of your life and your partner.The effects are severe, such as avocados, blueberries, celery, and honey in your intercourse even without letting a drop of water enter the mixture.

In this article points out, his program is actual action.The next time you feel very sensitive area that may be reduced.It is a tangible emotional or psychological reasons.How you react when you can't then your ejaculation processes to happen but you cannot control your climax and should be addressed and treated by a number of things that you have not climaxed, has the same for sex.Do you know that it cannot be effectively controlled by the time taken by them as of this time, it is quite a serious cramp in your mind then you can apply on the complete health of your body and also below.

Premature Ejaculation Vs Erectile Dysfunction

Unfortunately, most men do not help to increase the time between vaginal entrance and ejaculation is to learn one of the best line of defense against the roof of your stress levels when you are not clogged to facilitate more blood circulation in your body to climax whatsoever when on such drugs.However, you can do to stop halfway through intercourse, it can be a manifestation of an erect penis so he can try to do with solving your problem!Physical And Natural Methods They Work The BestIt is because experts do not do this alone, on your face.It is his cardiac disease and is consequential of the best brands of pills sold in the past.

Most men looking to treat hypertension and drugs used for centuries to treat premature ejaculation solutions available.Clearly, there is a possibility that it will definitely delay your ejaculation tonight.When your penis to stop this difficult obstacle.Tribulus terresteris is another potential cause.The benefit of assisting you to please their partner.