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43501 · 2 months ago

Note

Do you have any headcanons about what L would be like in a romance? Your vision of Near literally blessed me and I hope you can do L justice, since in the media people see him as not caring about a potential partner and that leaves me disappointed :(

I'm absolutely thrilled and charmed you've liked what I've spun about Near, I'm devastated to admit I don't think I can do L justice to this degree… he's wonderful, but I'm not an L scholar who can write (stops writing this reply to check how much I've written on Near) 10,000~ words worth of ardent meta about him… but I'll talk a bit about him and write out the headcanons I do have.

Scrutinizing everything Ohba and Obata say about L in all of their interviews, it's clear to me they originally envisioned L as a bit heartless. But all Death Note media since - the anime, the films, the Change the WorLd novel, the J-Drama, the DS games, the musical - all favor an interpretation of L that's more compassionate and human. I have a crackpot theory that fan reception and Alessandro Juliani's (award-winning, I remind you) performance in the English dub influenced this shift, in a similar way to how a couple of Japanese videogames around that time got re-released in Japan with script changes influenced by English localizations (such as Treehouse's localizations for Animal Crossing: Population Growing! and Animal Crossing: Wild World).

Example: in HTR13, Ohba and Obata say that L was lying when he called Light his first friend. No other media since treats this as a lie. Especially in Change the WorLd - L wears Light's watch for the remainder of his life. Also, the novel and film are explicit that L is affected by the horrible things he's witnessed while solving cases and cares about justice for the victims. The novels aren't written by Ohba and Obata, but they did have oversight and endorsed M's work on publication (though perhaps not as passionately as Nisio Isin writing Another Note).

All this to say I think pinning down the "true" L is difficult. I will say that I reject any interpretation of L as callous and uncaring, the same way I reject interpretations of Near as wholly unemotional.

In romance, I think he is basically as he appears in "L the ProLogue to Death Note: Spiraling Trap". He is enigmatic and somewhat difficult to earn the trust of, but he cares deeply about the people in his circle of trust. I don't have a screenshot on hand, but there's a line in the game where he says he'd be disappointed with himself if he ever let (you) get hurt or endangered. This is L. In Death Note's canon, we see similar things with the Japanese Task Force (recall how genuinely upset he is when Ukita dies).

Anyway, my honest thoughts on L romance, based on on a combination of the manga, anime and the DS game where the player can court him.

Earth-shatteringly good kisser, even though he's definitely never kissed anyone before. He's been orally fixated his whole life, he has S-tier instincts and rather lacks shame. Obviously, he's immaculate at oral sex as well. Just another thing in his long list of Mary Sue traits: genius savant, internationally recognized super detective, skilled at capoeria, English tennis champion... it's completely reasonable that this is just another one of those things he's perfect at on first try.

He's capable of being gentle but has a tendency to escalate - even brief, innocent kisses often spin out of control and transform into desperate grabbing and tangling tongues.

Verbally and physically demonstrative about his affections, when the mood takes him. L consistently shows himself to be a pretty bold personality who doesn't shy away from closing in on what he wants. He kind of just heedlessly does what he wants a lot of the time, doesn't he? That extends to when he wants to be around you, have your attention, be doted on, be entertained, kiss you, have sex with you etc.

In general, I would describe a relationship with him as "intense". He's an intense man. I can understand a dizzying range of headcanons for L, but any idea of him as "relaxed" or "shy" or "passive" or anything like that is just plain wrong and contradicts the person we see in every piece of Death Note media.

Thinks he's straight but is in reality gender agnostic when it comes to falling in love/being attracted to somebody. In Spiraling Trap he's confused if a male player gives him a Valentine's day chocolate, but in my view it's just because he's never given serious thought to himself with another man before. Once he starts developing a strong bond, he'll start to think differently and find that he thinks women and men equally appealing.

Has a bunch of kinks including (but not limited to) foodplay, shibari, feet (cliche but I really think so) and more I don't want to list here for fear of scaring people (nothing objectionable, just weird - by his own admission he's "strange").

For the life of me I can't imagine him as asexual, but if he is, he's the kind that finds sex and kink incredibly interesting on an intellectual level and likes to observe, even if he doesn't partake.

While writing this, I kept feeling compelled to compare him to Near, which is really funny and meta. Near was intentionally written by his authors to have a lot of L's traits as his "natural successor", but at the same time he's his own, completely different person. I don't mean to derail this into a Nearpost so I'll be really brief.

Broad strokes: As a lover, L is intense, confident and open. Near is subtle and withdrawn.

Both men prefer an educated, clever partner who can keep up with them intellectually, but their relationship secret spices are different. L is drawn to people who are interesting and offbeat in some way. Near is drawn to passionate, emotional people who he admires and feels invigorated by.

Things they have in common in love: they are both used to being waited on and getting everything they want, and so expect to be pampered (L with desserts, Near with requisition lists for toys). Detective work takes a lot of their time and they don't want a demanding partner who asks for a lot of time and attention. They don't suffer fools. They can be tactless with their partner on various matters, but don't mean to be malicious.

Things they're very different on in love: L can be fickle and mercurial, Near is more reliable and steadfast. L expresses his feelings verbally quite openly and enjoys just spending time with his lover, Near relies on gift-giving and physical affection to express himself, forever feeling a little shy and poor with words. L enjoys sex and is a natural at it, Near could go without and is average at best even with practice (sorry).

Now let's look at some pictures from Spiraling Trap together. (takes your hand)

(Isn't it wild how this game suggests that he would consider granting his detective code to his lover on his passing if he had one? Fuck them Wammy's kids, I guess.)

#death note #meta #l lawliet #l x reader #l

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darkersolstice · 4 days ago

Text

On Devotion

It's interesting to me, how the concept of slavish devotion to one person is depicted multiple times in Wind Breaker. How 'you are my world' is a demand and a lament all at once. How 'you were my world' is painful, but also a sign of growth.

Spoilers for the manga ahead. No, this was not the next essay I had planned on writing.

Sugishita

The first example of 'submissive like a guard dog' devotion we see is Sugishita, toward Umemiya. In the beginning of canon, it can be argued that Umemiya is the only person within Sugishita's world--though it's acknowledged that he tolerates the other Four Kings, hanging onto the group to bask in the light of Umemiya's dream.

It's recent chapters that have pulled this back, with Sakura being acknowledged as cool, and Umemiya counseling Sugishita quite explicitly that he's not just allowed to change, but that doing so is a good thing. Because it is a good thing! And part of the reason why that's called out is the need for tension to encourage growth:

If someone is the center of your worship, you can't really broaden your horizons while remaining solely focused on them, can you? And Umemiya calls out how Sakura's horizons have been broadened recently.

With Sugishita, the story we're getting is one of the least unhealthy examples of this trope (look, we've got Endo's relationship with Takashii coming up in this essay), but like. A significant part of that is that the object of devotion is aware of the emotions in play, and wants to encourage him to self-actualize. That's not always the case, though.

Sako

This next example is a bit different because the pedestal was broken before canon begun. Sako would have done anything for Hiragi, wanted to be part of the force pushing him to the top of Furin. There was so much pressure building up there...and then Hiragi himself popped the balloon.

Sako read this as a rejection of him, because he'd tied up his personhood in the idea of rolling Hiragi up that hill to the top. It wasn't, though, as we saw with Kaji who followed Hiragi regardless.

There's an interesting thought during the fight between Hiragi and Sako in the Shishitoren arc. Sako screams that "There's no way I'd lose to someone who willingly bows to someone else!!!" But that's who he was before Hiragi cut him loose. This is as much an expression of self-loating as anything else.

We get the chance to contrast Sako with Kaji, among Hiragi's followers. When told he didn't need to follow, Kaji's reaction was the equivalent of a middle finger while enrolling in Furin. Which shows a healthier sort of response to the apparent-rejection than Sako's complete repudiation of Hiragi and everything he stands for now.

"If I chose to go with you, would you have cared for me the same way?" Dumbass, he showed you a very violent loving care back in the Shishitoren arc. He wouldn't have agreed to that fight if it didn't matter to him. And like, to Hiragi, the words "come with me" probably didn't have the weight they did to Sako, but they healed a rift that neither of them is quite emotionally articulate enough to acknowledge directly.

...except in the case of Sako to Inugami. Guess his world is getting broader, too.

Togame

The Togame Jo we're introduced to in the Shishitoren arc is not Togame as he wants to be. He has become shut down and bitter and brutal and hard, because that is what he perceives as the version of himself that Tomiyama needs.

It was not asked of him, that he become the metaphorical executioner, the grim reaper, the one to cull the weak from the Shishitoren herd. It was a task he chose, intending for Tomiyama to remain innocent and blameless in the eyes of the gang. And as he fell into this role, he lost the plot, allowing his gang to become saturated with bullies. Togame still has a moral compass, even behind his rose yellow-tinted glasses, and having to be the monster hurts him.

But he will do it for Tomiyama.

Going back to the beginning to re-read the Shishitoren arc, I found this panel, which is going to haunt me a little, I think:

Tomiyama never wanted a blind devotee in Togame, he wanted someone who'd challenge him, whereas Togame's view of the future was more like this:

There's something I said back in one of my past rambles about food, that Togame is the one providing food among Shishitoren leadership, and revisiting these two views of reaching the top makes me wonder if we won't someday see a role reversal, with Togame being the top of Shishitoren over Tomiyama.

ANYWAY, this essay isn't for speculation, it's for seeing what is and what was.

Maybe in another world, Togame might have chosen to walk, but in this one, he is not a devotee of power--he's a devotee of Tomiyama, and so he decides to become the executioner, to set his morals aside in the name of serving his sun.

(Side note: the juxtaposition of the ideals of freedom and their base being "the cage" merits further chewing later.)

(Side note, now I want to write a fanfic in which he does walk away, and perhaps ends up interacting with Roppo Ichiza and Gravel?)

What breaks him from this worldview is a.) someone pointing out how far his lapse of morals has allowed Shishitoren to fall, to the point where they're beating up on junior high kids for the fun of it and b.) Sakura qua Sakura. Because the boy's power as a protagonist isn't just throwing punches, it's calling things like he sees them and not accepting the pre-existing state of his world.

Of course, like he did with Sugishita, Sakura forces Togame to look outside his tight focus on Tomiyama, becoming part of a more healthy Shishitoren. Though as many fanfiction writers have noted, there's a certain tension between Togame and Sakura which could easily shift into something more like romance. There's a reason we see Togame and Sakura talking about the Noroshi attack in a way we don't see laid out as thoroughly as for Gravel or Roppo Ichiza; the connection those two have is important.

(...once again I feel obligated to point out that Tomiyama isn't the one Sakura has that conversation with. I keep chewing on this bit about how, like. Being the strongest isn't the only criteria needed for a leader, and that's already going to be a chunk of Sakura's arc, isn't it?

Also, while I'm digressing, Togame gets a glimpse into what Nirei and Suo learned about Sakura by visiting him while he was sick, in seeing Sakura struggle with a Ramune. He has never had many of the comforts and cultural touchpoints that most kids their age have.)

It's interesting that they're on a rooftop and explicitly outside the cage, isn't it?

All of this is setting us up for the current chapters, where Togame is living his best life: he's cut his hair, he's providing food for people in his town, he's not hiding behind tinted glasses, and he's in the perfect position to be giving advice to Sakura. I don't think his story is complete (probably clear for all the stuff I've been saying, huh?), but he's in a lot better place now that he's not just following orders and compromising his moral core to do so.

Endo

Ah, and now we reach the ultimate peak of slavish devotion, don't we? The complete simp with eyes for no one but his partner. This is the darkest form of this trope we've seen so far, and might be the most fascinating, a pure Masochism Tango, falling in love with a black hole and letting it swallow you.

Endo likes the idea of that sort of pure focus on one person, centering them in your world, thinking it a form of pure connection. Hell, he even idealizes a moment of that sort of thing with Sakura, during their fight:

But if your world is only one person, that's an awfully limited thing, isn't it? We all need people to challenge us, to help us grow. And after his fight with Sakura, Endo has just. one. more. person. he's willing to see and acknowledge besides Takashii.

What he wants for Sakura is for him to be just as closed off and selfish. For him to become "a blazing inferno that consumes everything it touches indiscriminately", like Takashii is. Here's the thing: Endo knows he's part of that 'everything it touches', with Takashii. He doesn't have a concept of what a future together could look like in a healthy relationship, he's just indulging in this maelstrom of destruction in order to watch his firework glow.

And on some level, he's fully conscious of how fucked up the situation is, but in his words...

It's infatuation, not love, and even he can acknowledge it! But that doesn't stop him from his destructive choices.

And he becomes infatuated with Sakura, too, during their fight. But it's the same sort of completely batshit infatuation that doesn't make either of them better as people. On Endo's end, he literally thinks, "I've decided I need to have you. That's why, right now, I need to absolutely destroy you." There's the seed of an idea there that if he can dominate Sakura completely, he will be able to take ownership of him, disillusioning him of the Bofurin ideals and turning him into the same sort of monster Takashii is.

(Which would never work with how much Sakura has grown at this point in the story. He has allowed the views of those outside Furin to help shape his worldview, honing it more. He's rejected the ideals that both Gravel and Roppo Ichiza were operating under during the fight on Keisei Street, and proven that he is capable of making Smart Choices that even Umemiya couldn't.)

At the end of the Noroshi arc, Endo is still an obsessive devoted dog, but one who now has a second object of his obsession--this is so clearly contrasted against Sugishita, who resolves to grow and become more by no longer avoiding the things that are mere annoyances to him.

(There's also room to use Sugishita as a foil for Takashii, wrt being really closed off from the world and seeing most things as a bother. But that's another essay for another day, isn't it?)

Other Thoughts

There's other characters in the series who are fiercely loyal, but whose devotion isn't the same sort of singleminded focus that I've been talking about, and I feel like it's worth it to acknowledge them too.

In another manga or anime, Nirei would end up as a hanger on sort, a cheerleader, someone who's just there to be an audience surrogate and protectee. But instead, we see an actual example of Nirei punching Sakura in the middle of the Endo fight, to tell him he's being a complete dumbass and doesn't need to take everything in the world on himself.

Tsubaki has a crush on Umemiya (and let's be real, who doesn't?), but it never is the sole defining point of his character. He is allowed to have his own story, his own background, his cool after-school job and relationships with people on Keisei street, entirely outside his feelings for Ume. It feels like one of the healthiest crushes that exists in the show.

I mentioned Kaji briefly while talking about Sako. While he definitely feels like he owes it to Hiragi for allowing him to feel like he can be human, instead of a beast, he's been forced to grow beyond the point where that's what matters about him, by being a grade captain. He has to keep a broader worldview, because he has his class to worry about.

I dunno, I just think this theme of healthy loyalty vs. unhealthy obsession is really cool, and deserves to be discussed more.

#wbk analysis #wbk spoilers #wind breaker #meta commentary #come and get your food

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imgibbon · 22 days ago

Text

So anyway Ikana Canyon was a Gerudo kingdom.

Desert people ruled over by a powerful and proud red-haired king, its people have a distinct styling that matches the patterns that Ganondorf is wearing in OoT

the residents of Ikana have been cursed with undeath, and Iron Knuckles buried in the crypts still have their Gerudo bodies trapped inside the armor. Notably, the Iron Knuckle's design hasn't changed from OoT, but they still fit right in because of the above-mentioned stylings of the Ikana matching OoT's Gerudo.

The Stone Tower, the region's temple, mirrors (ha) the Spirit Temple with its icon item being the Mirror Shield and most of its puzzles being based around redirecting beams of light. Like the Spirit Temple, it is also a giant effigy to an object of warship other than the state religion. In the Spirit Temple's case it was Din, by herself, as opposed to the worship of the Goddesses as a trio/Hylia, and in the Stone Tower's case, it's in the image of Majora.

Additionally, the Stone Tower Temple features unique designs on its giant mobile blocks that must be moved around, depicting squat little creatures sticking their tongues out. When the temple is inverted and you can see the bottom of these blocks, you can see that the creatures are sitting on and licking an inverted triforce

The symbol of the inverted triforce has since become associated with two things. Most prominently, the Kingdom of Lorule from Link Between Worlds, but perhaps more importantly, Demise, who has it displayed on his sword in an inversion of the Master Sword.

Hyrule Warriors suggests that Demise's blade was re-forged into Ganon's trident, which is backed up by Four Swords Adventures saying that the trident whispered to the current Ganondorf and corrupted him when he found it in the pyramid.

Demise is, notably, a dark and evil god who is known for cursing people and has dragonlike qualities, who has a certain... inferred history with the Gerudo peoples. Majora is, according to the prequel chapter of the manga, a dragon who was sealed away in one of his own scales that was carved into the iconic mask.

Those that escaped the life of undeath apparently migrated and continued being a people of the sands... but trading the desert for the coast, turning to piracy to survive. This isn't actually out of nowhere though. Other games in the series suggest that the region now known as the Gerudo Desert might have once been ocean. Time stones roll back the ages to reveal a coastal region and sea in Skyward Sword, and Breath of the Wild features the skeletons of giant whales scattered about the wastes. So perhaps they were just returning to their ancestral roots.

Either way, what we have here is a sordid tale of two parallel worlds with parallel history of a proud desert people corrupted by the influence of a petty draconic god.

#the legend of zelda #majora's mask #ocarina of time #demise #ganondorf #gerudo #skyward sword #hyrule warriors #four swords #four swords adventures #breath of the wild

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glamourscat · 5 months ago

Note

Hello hello!

If/when you have the time to do so, it'd be pretty cool to see some headcannons about the type of nerd stuff Tim does/is into. Like what kinds of games and shows he's into, "nerdy" behaviors of his, would he ever cosplay, etc. I personally think that he'd be into Dungeons and Dragons (not sure to what degree though).

Also, as an alternative, you could do headcannons about Tim with a nerdy!S/O who "matches his freak", so to speak.

Anyway, that's pretty much it! Have a nice day/night!

TIM DRAKE NERDY HOBBIES HCS

Tim being into DnD is actually canon! The game he played in the comics was called Warlocks and Warriors

So, to what degree would he play? I think a pretty serious one

Not necessarily every week game night sort of thing, but at least once at month, or when he and his group can regroup to play together

I can see him going deep into the character making. Choosing the name accurately to the ability they have, the powers and so on

He wouldn’t be necessarily into “solving” games, like cluedo, for example. He is a vigilante, it’s a big part of him sure, but he also needs a break you know?

Games that represent too “close” to his real life would be a no no from the get go. Monopoly, cluedo and anything of the sorts

He is the type to prefer table games. Regrouping with his friends and play cards or anything really, just makes his night

In terms of video games I can see him play mini games (?) like small horror, thrilling ones on his pc. Otherwise he enjoys going to the arcade more. 80/90s style games are more up to his liking

Though, something he really LOVES, is Pokémon. He has a Nintendo switch just to play Pokémon games

Guilty pleasure are cooking mama, animal crossing and super Mario

The type to download the sim just to recreate you guys on the game and your love life

Loves legos. Especially the big set ones, he finishes them so quickly

A star wars fan

I see him as someone who really would enjoy watching anime and reading manga

Definitely fantasy ones, especially ones with mythical creatures, aka vampires (?) idk I just get those vibes

But heavy on the type of anime that play mind games. That are filled with mysteries, foreshadows and twists, confusion and maybe dive slightly into psychology too

JJK, blue exorcist (manga), attack of titans, erased, Steins:Gate, detective Conan, the case study of vanitas, odd taxi, psycho pass, the perfect insider, black butler, death note, monster

He would love to go to anime conventions

Definitely the type to lose himself around the stands 24567 times

Buys way too much merch

Has an extended collection of Funko pops, mangas, collectors editions and figures

Very big on graphic novels, comics and fantasy books too!

He is into coding. Something he really enjoys is creating little interactive websites pages for his s/o

Like this one

Collects the most random shit. Like I imagine him travelling for missions, state to state or outside the US and all of the sudden he brought back a collection of the most obscure handmade thing he could find in that place.

Big into astronomy. Hell, he is the type to randomly say in a conversation “today Mars will be visible at so and so degree, so I’m busy tonight” (I don’t even know if that’s possible but that’s besides the point)

Photography, although not as “nerdy”, he loves it. His style is more urban leaning. He manages to capture what he wants in his work perfectly

lastly, HE DEFINETLY COSPLAYS!!! i mean, look at canon

#tim drake x reader #tim drake #tim drake x you #tim jackson drake #red robin #red robin x reader #red robin x you #tim drake headcanon #tim drake hc #tim drake fanfiction #tim drake fluff #he is a nerd i love him

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laikabu · 1 year ago

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re: my thoughts on laios’s sexuality (long post ahead lol)

let me start this post with this. first, this contains a lot of references to the new adventurer’s bible world guide book released last february. i can read japanese, but i’m sure they’re translated somewhere. general spoiler warning in case. also… i am ESL, so sorry for any grammar errors

second, if you’re on the team that insists laios doesn’t care about humans enough to form relationships, either read the manga again or at the very least read this thread.

last, please don’t chime in with your acearo headcanons on this post. there’s already a majority of posts here that insist laios is acearo and that anything else is impossible. i don’t like it the same way i don’t like when someone declares they hc marcille as bisexual to a poster who reads her as lesbian. i already have enough people here who declare he’s ace on my own art. at least people on twitter of all places don’t do this sort of thing to me. nothing in this manga is canon, you can headcanon anything i won’t get mad if you hc him as bi or something. just. don’t be weird on my post.

okay. trust me, i love women, and i love the idea of making my favs women lovers but the idea of laios being gay really appeals to me because of his background. this isn’t fueled by yaoi since i don’t even ship the only m/m relationship i bring up here, i just think it adds a nice layer to his disconnect with his own humanity

i do think laios has a very abstract relationship with his sexuality for a multitude of reasons. he grew up in a very conservative backwater village. he has a hard time recognizing his own feelings towards others just as much as vice versa. i don’t really care for the “laios is a monsterfucker” agenda people are pushing but i do think he’d engage in sexual thoughts in his own weird way, i won’t deny his deviantart fetish shit

as an autistic person myself, i relate to how he’d prioritize his special interest over social interactions. after all, he was fixated on monster food so he’s distracted from dark thoughts. he’s not an actual glutton

he’s shy around women, but i don’t think it’s out of attraction. i just think it’s because he’s awkward and doesn’t want to be seen as a threat. there’s a couple of times when, out of armor, he deliberately tries to make himself look smaller and nonthreatening.

he didn’t show any interest towards ashivia (the hubby hunter girl marcille replaced) and just humored her because she wouldn’t leave him alone. his other party members thought he was giving her special treatment so he had to tell her he “doesnt want to give her special treatment anymore”(even though he never did), so she left

ashivia did her best to butter herself up to laios and he didn’t care, but laios thought shuro was his bestest friend in the whole world because he was too much of a pushover to reject him. ironically… what ashivia did to him parallels what he was doing to shuro

also… yeah sorry i keep bringing up that one comic of laios saying if he were falin he’d marry shuro and then begging him to take him back to his country, or that comic of laios wondering why he doesn’t like him(and then the first two questions he asks the magic mirror was what if he or shuro were women). i don’t even ship them! but it’s not a reach to assume that he likes men because of this, even if it’s kinda played like a joke(after all,a lot of people like chilshi even though their ‘shippy’ interaction was played as a joke)

of course, given the setting, i don’t think knows he’s gay, he wouldn’t have the vocabulary to label himself. i do want to dance around with the idea of him forcibly confronting his own sexuality after years of yaad pressuring him to produce heirs lol. laios might not be cishet but he’s a king so he rdgaf about that right now. i’m open to him having female consorts for political reasons, but i don’t think he’s into women, is all.

before anyone brings up his succubus… god forbid an author makes hetbait. a part of the plot twist was that not-marcille wasn’t the only succubus enticing laios, his other party members were copied too. she was the only one who approached him. also… succubi aren’t always inherently romantic. once it realized marcille didn’t work, it switched to appeal to his desire to be a monster.

#laios isn’t even in my top 3 fav but i gotta throw this out to the void #dungeon meshi meta #laios touden #dungeon meshi #dungeon meshi spoilers #kabru sexuality is easy cuz that dude is capital B Bisexual but laios has layers to it i feel

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luffyvace · 1 year ago

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Helloooo! I saw ur request open and writing for saiki k! I see so little context of him 😭

May I request where saiki is dating his favorite author(she is an anonymous writer) and he didn't know (like she Naver though to tell him about it and she Naver really think of her work when w him or when in school) and maybe finding out through his dad that she is ? And how would he react and think after he found out ?

(sorry if my request was long 😭)

Yeah me too !! 😭

ohhh wow! What an interesting and fun request! Thank you :}

(you used ‘she’ so reader implied is fem but I won’t mention you being a girl just in case <3)

Don’t worry it’s not too long at all~

☕️🌷

Everyday you get home after school and write, as a comfort and to make some change to buy things you like :)

You do publish your work, but your an anonymous writer

your sales have been doing really good and everything! Your forever grateful!

it makes you happy seeing as though writing makes you happy and is your comfort!

so the fact that you could be doing that for others makes you joyous 💓

there’s also your boyfriend Kusuo!

he’s a reserved and genuine guy who treats you very well :)

you’ve been an item for a while now and your really happy in your relationship!

man you’ve really got it going for yourself!! 😋💪

this company has been loyally publishing your work for quite some time which makes you satisfied to see they like your writing!

school’s good too! You and Kusuo have a friend group who you go out with pretty often

(alright that was a little bit of some reader POV now here’s the fun part! 😆)

Kusuo finished his coffee jelly and was going down stairs to put the dishes in the sink

until he spotted his dad reading his favorite book/manga!!

”hey dad what book is that?”

his dad’s inner dialogue: “holy crap my son is talking to me!”

“oh uh nothing son just uh (book/manga title name)—I uhh, brought a copy from work home”

”they have that series there?”

”yeah! We do! We have every chapter! Actually, we’re the ones publishing them! Do want me to get you the set?…..if I lick my bosses shoes a couple extra times I’m sure I could pull a few strings..”

”thanks.”

his dad’s inner dialogue: “holy crap I just had a conversation with my son! He was wanted to talk to…me! I can’t believe it..!”

saiki’s inner dialogue: “goodness..😒🤦”

”n-no problem son! Heheh..”

He was gonna go back to his room but stopped at the stairs

“hey dad..the author uses a pen name..do you know who they are?”

“Huh-! Oh!- yeah I do! I’ve met them in person actually- do you wanna meet them?”

Kusuo nods and walks off

his dad then proceeds to dance in his living room, as he’s had a successful conversation with his son that Kusuo started 🕺🕺

Later that week, saiki and his dad wait for you to show up at his job with the latest chapter

he was indeed able to pull a few strings…by licking some shoes..

when you walk in Kusuo’s dad came up to you and (re)introduced you to his son

”Kusuo this is (Name), the author you asked me to introduce you to. (Name), meet my son Kusuo”

you looked surprised to see Kusuo and that he wanted to meet you?? I mean you know your anonymous but he likes your work?! You had no idea he was buying!

Kusuo has a slightly amused expression on his face

“Kusuo? You…”

..were at a loss of words at such a funny situation! (LOL)

you two ended up explaining both sides of the situation

you said you love to write, but anonymously and you never got around to telling him

he said this is his favorite series from you and your his favorite author, he’s been buying for a while to be frank!

ohhh!

this may be the way his parents found out you were a couple and let me tell you he was less than pleased..(not that he wanted to hide it but his parents…..:^ yeah 😃)

Saiki got the privilege of getting the first copy of the latest chapter before it was even published! :)

and now he always does <3

he also has the perk of getting it for free!

horray! Now he can save his money for coffee jelly- 😚

LOL not that he doesn’t wanna support you

you simply give it to him and he accepts ♥︎

he also gets the honors of helping you decide things for the story!

He gleefully reads the parts in which his opinion was inserted

however he doesn’t want to influence any major plot points- he doesn’t like spoilers :P

(It is possible he persuades people at school to buy your books so you can have the funding to keep going and make you happy simultaneously—but we’ll never really know 🤷‍♀️ )

your actually my first saiki k request! Thank you! I appreciate it love!

hopefully you had a good meal out of these headcanons cherished anonymous~ ☺️

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shannonsketches · 3 months ago

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Mmmthinkin about Yambul and Vegebul as opposite experiences

To be fair to Yamcha being unkind to Bulma in all the classically sexist ways he was, Bulma was insecure and unkind to him too for reasons that were his fault and reasons that had nothing to do with him.

They were kids when they met and decided immediately that they should move in together. It's easy to fall into bad habits and stay there, especially because Yamcha is insecure too. He was 16, he didn't have much experience with personal relationships outside of Pu'ar, he doesn't know what a relationship is supposed to look like outside of whatever romantic fiction he might've consumed. And neither does Bulma. Her parents are distracted and ditzy and non-traditional and constantly imply interest in other people, and all Bulma seems to know about real-life relationships is that she does NOT want one like theirs.

But Yamcha is like Goku, he's a nomad, he's a wanderer, and he wants a homemaker wife who's his champion and his cheerleader and will yearn for his return to her side, and he finds out very quickly that Bulma is not that girl.

Bulma is independent, and loud, and expresses her needs and expects them to be met or else she'll handle them herself and move past you. She is not a damsel, she is not a dough-eyed ingenue. She likes to be in the driver's seat.

She wants a man she can show off, because the only thing she can't do on her own is prove that she's loved, to herself or anyone else, and they are constantly fueling each others anxiety and self-doubt.

But Yamcha is constantly, through no fault of his own, gouging her Achilles tendon, because he physically cannot not react when he's attracted to a woman. Which means literally any time they are in public together, anywhere, Yamcha is Reacting to the women around him, when he's with Bulma.

Bulma, the one beautiful girl he no longer has that response to, because he's gotten used to her (although, who's to say if he could ever handle her naked or, uh, wanting without passing out. This poor man has the world's most inconvenient case of BDE). And in return, Bulma is consistently embarrassed about his arrogance in battle, which tends to end badly for him.

This hasn't changed! She is also embarrassed when Vegeta displays arrogance in battle.

The difference is, as Daima pointed out, Bulma can effectively use her value to him to dissuade his behavior. The never worked with Yamcha. They'd fight and he'd go to Kame House or somewhere she couldn't reach him.

(In the manga/Toriyama stories) Vegeta doesn't. Vegeta always comes home. Vegeta wants to be near Bulma. Even at the lowest point of their relationship, they're still in communication with each other. She doesn't always know where he is but she confidently reports that she knows he's been working hard. He's still asking her to build gear for him. She told him their son's name.

Vegeta can't be instigated the way that Yamcha could, because even if he's not starting fights, he's certainly not afraid to finish them. The things he's insecure about aren't generally things anyone else can use against him, because Vegeta is his own biggest fan and his own loudest critic.

Bulma can't rely on her lash-out habits with him like she could with Yamcha. There's no flowers and sorry babys and take-me-backs with Vegeta. If you say you're done, nothing in his history would make him assume that's code for 'chase me, beg me, change my mind'. Vegeta's culture is very Final. If it's over, it's Over.

Likewise, Vegeta can't rely on intimidation habits with her. The Back Offs and Bristling and I'll Kill Yous don't work on Bulma. So what? She's got friends to bring her back to life. She made candy that will give a grown man on-demand diarrhea. Death is not the most violent thing she can do to retaliate against an abuser. Get a new play, this one's boring.

They force each other to re-strategize how they handle conflict, and both grow as a result. The growth helps them trust and understand each other. The trust and understanding helps them figure out how to love each other, and how they need to be loved.

Yamcha and Bulma held hands and jumped into the abyss at 16 years old, and just assumed it would all make sense when they were older, the way kids do. Then, fell into the habit of just waiting for things to change. At the end of the day, they love each other, and that's enough, right? It'll work out because love is all you need.

Eventually they found out that love is, in fact, not all you need to maintain a healthy, committed adult relationship.

Vegeta and Bulma were the opposite. They were sharing space with each other for years before any romantic or sexual interest took hold. One was focused on his goals and was only ever home at night. The other was dealing with her relationship, and her job, and hunting for Dragon Balls, and rehoming tens of thousands of aliens while keeping the neighbors from knowing anything weird was going on.

By the time it was just the two of them, they'd already known each other for years and watched each other work and operate, and from that built a certain amount of mutual trust and respect. The next parts weren't smooth sailing by any measure, but neither of them trusted smooth sailing anyway.

What they did both trust is pragmatism, and decided that after the smoke cleared and the ground settled that they still liked each other's company and trusted each other's smarts enough to figure out how to fix the boat and navigate the water together.

It took years for them to decide that what they had was love, and that they were happy with that revelation. Vegeta likes having a partner who's outspoken and curious. Bulma likes having a partner who's grounded and structured. Both of them enjoy each other's confidence and intensity — even when it makes them Concerned(tm) — and those are things both of them grew up being told were the biggest flaw in their character.

And the best part is that Bulma and Yamcha still love each other SO MUCH, they're just happier and healthier as friends (at least, as always, in the manga).

#dbtag #silly hours #chinhands I just think they're neat and important #this isn't terribly organized but whatever it's a blog post not an academic article #media analysis

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jazeswhbhaven · 2 months ago

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Mc has a pact with Foras. One day, something embarrassing happens, and they re like "omg omg omg I wish I could disappear" and then they go invisible. The problem is they don't know how to turn off invisibility, but they learn alot of secrets about the kings 👀

Oh???? OHHHH

This pact perk would be so crafty too because not even the kings can detect Foras when he's in the room, so MC learns some pretty nifty things about each one of them.

(these are just random secret headcanon's btw for the scenario)

For Satan, MC finds out that he has a destressing room where there's things to break, kick, bite, and so forth. But there's a new area in there where it's a dummy of them in the corner and he sits on it after he's done destressing and he cuddles with it and sleeps which looks mighty fucking weird since he sleeps with his eyes open so MC can't really tell if he is or not lmao.

If they manage to find a way to Tartaros during this time, they observe Mammon having a secret dessert room he doesn't tell anyone but Bimet about. It has very rare desserts from all different kinds of places, even different worlds! They all have a bite taken out of them and stored in special boxes where they don't go bad for centuries. He likes remembering how they taste, how they look.

In Abyssos, it's really hard to track down Beel, but Bael usually can get him on the phone and MC happens to walk in on a very strange conversation one day. So Bael this time is scolding Beel for stealing his clothing, even his dirty laundry because now he has to go and buy new ones. Since the call is on speaker, MC can hear Beel explain that the only reason he does it is because Bael's scent is thick enough to trick everyone else into thinking he's not Beelzebub when traveling lmao. As for stealing his underwear though, he likes how they feel on his skin and doesn't bother to wash them or anything when he remembers to return them.

Sooo this is a bit tricky to use in Hades, because Leviathan knows when Foras is in the room (iirc), so he could easily detect when MC is, right? Nope. He doesn't even notice. This means MC can see what he does everyday. Everything is quite normal, until they notice that Levi tends to undress in front of the mirror and stare at himself and his scars, he traces each one, and then he ends up choking himself while saying MC's name. Unknown to MC at that time but he does this quite often as a de-stressor. But guess who knows that MC is watching currently? Foras. He's the only one who can see MC, another perk of the pact.

Now, Paradise Lost is probably not a good place to be invisible in, ya know just in case you need some medical assistance but this means MC can observe what Lucifer does. Unfortunately he seems absent when they are around but they do stumble on Lucifer's collection of....random photos of Satan? None of them are lewd, it's just random shots of him from above, kind of as if Lucifer took them from his height. There was even one where Lucifer was petting Satan who resembled an angry cat ready to scratch him. Maybe he just finds Satan that adorable he has to keep these images of him. What a strange thing lol

Now MC already knew what to expect being invisible in Niflheim. Not much. Not much at all. Oh wait, what a second...Belphegor sleep talks? He keeps grumbling about random things, also the name of the Kings keep popping up in his vocabulary too. He's revealing some pretty weird habits and kinks he's heard and seen in his mangas and shows. And MC's name? Oh wait...he's having a wet dream?! He's reaching out, does he...know? Nope he was just reaching for a pillow so he can stuff it between his legs and hump it. Okie dokie then.

Lastly...Abaddon. This is a good place to be invisible in as to not draw attention, right? What secrets could MC find in the largest prison in Hell? Well since everyone is locked up, there's not much gossip, which is really boring. However, today is a lucky day for MC because guess who's outside the palace talking with one of the guards? Asmodeus. But just as MC starts to get closer to hear better, the lusty king's head snaps in their direction as he sniffs the air. Well, turns out he can smell MC even if they're invisible. And now it's a dangerous game of hide and seek. But if we remember from earlier, Foras can see them, which means Foras followed them everywhere even here and quickly gets them back to Hades safely before Asmo finds them. Not all is lost though, Foras does have one secret to share that he learned on his own and that Asmo had to get reconstructive surgery one time because his dick was disfigured by him because the person he slept with had teeth in every orifice. And with that...perhaps MC has done enough sleuthing for one day

#whb #jwhbasks❓#whb headcanons #wild headcanons #lol this was funny to write #whb kings

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clownakai · 1 month ago

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Hi! It's me again! Let's talk about: Shiho's trauma and how Gosho's portrayal of it comes as a pleasant surprise within Detco's rather abysmal landscape of in-depth representation

Very important disclaimer(s): I am not a licensed professional yet, and I am not diagnosed with any kind of trauma-related disorder. I nonetheless hold this topic dearly and wish to gather in one place at least a few of the things that made me truly appreciate the portrayal of Shiho's trauma in a way others haven't. Lastly, this remains of course a personal opinion first and foremost, so keep that in mind if you decide to dive into it!

P.S. - While I always try to start from canon material, we lack a lot of details re: Shiho's backstory. I will generally attempt to hypothesize what could have transpired in the past considering the repercussions we can observe in Shiho's attitude and behaviors, but my own speculations cannot compare to canon actually filling in those blanks (which I highly doubt we'll ever get in the first place).

P.P.S. - this thing got long. Like. Really long. And because of tumblr’s newfound habit of flagging random things as nsfw, I couldn't add any manga screenshots. Get ready for a wall of text, gamers

The Roots of Shiho's Trauma

Trauma is in itself an incredibly complex topic— even the mere fact that a set threshold past which events can begin to be considered traumatic doesn't actually exist on the grounds that individuals tend to react differently to the same stimuli (e.g. I once had to watch my father get the shit beaten out of him by a man twice his size to the point he had to go to the hospital, but neither I nor my dad ended up developing any sort of trauma response afterwards— I'm no warier of strangers than I'd been prior to what happened, and my father is as polite and non-threatening around really tall strangers as ever. This isn't to say that the event itself didn't have an impact on us, of course, but it didn't significantly affect our day-to-day functioning in distressing ways either. I do however know of people who, after experiencing this type of assault, developed an all-consuming agoraphobia— among other trauma-related symptoms—, for example) renders things all the more nuanced from the get-go.

With that said there is of course a point to be made about the kind of trauma Shiho herself has been subjected to. In her case, the very environment she grew up in was traumatic: from a very young age— as soon as her giftedness was identified—, she's been pressured to excel, and while studying in the States, although I imagine she hadn't been strictly beholden to furthering the Organization's goals just yet, there must have been BO members or at least affiliates watching her every move.

Later on, she is constantly required to produce results via researching something we can't even be sure she was truly interested in: being a child prodigy and yet leading the research on the "wonder drug" means she was thrust in yet another environment full of adults that likely didn't much appreciate having to listen to a literal teenager, and on top of that her social life was considerably stunted in favor of the job she'd been assigned. At any and all times she'd been under scrutiny, and her own sister was made into an incentive for her to behave herself and stick to her duties. After Rye was outed as a NOC, the situation could only have degenerated— Akemi being most likely compromised meant there was a chance Sherry was as well, which would have translated into stricter regulations and increasingly more controlling behavior from the Organization.

Considering her backstory and how it's presented to us, we also know Shiho didn't have a childhood complete with stable parental figures, and she was separated from her much less useful sister very early on. That too is a kind of instability that deeply affects the developing individual, and if unaddressed it has a high chance of leading to widespread issues later in life.

So, we already have three pretty relevant points to start with: prolonged exposure to stress, perceived (but also very real) threats and instability that spans a decade at the very least. But fear not, for we can add more.

While I think this is somewhat of a point of contention within the fandom, I myself believe that there has been some sort of abuse perpetrated towards Shiho from within the BO's ranks. Her panic reaction extends to any and all members, yes, but Gin (and for some reason Vermouth) gets the biggest externalizations of it (let us never forget that he canonically stars in Shiho's nightmares).

Now, regardless of whether we're going to find out what kind of abuse Shiho went through (psychological, physical, sexual), and considering that we most likely never will, the implications on Gin's part abound in the early manga (and one can even posit that a few specific remarks made by Shiho are a direct consequence of her own experiences, expressed through dry humor and snark as a way of feeling more "in control" of the situation). I understand that Gin is literally "guy who will hunt you down and kill you with a smile", but so are basically all the other BO members, and Shiho only ever reacts so strongly to Gin. To me this means she either directly experienced some form of abuse at his hand, or that she projected well over a decade of stress and fear of the Organization onto Gin, thus turning him into a sort of boogeyman— a herald of every horrifying thing the BO is capable of.

Lastly, the impact of Akemi's death should also be taken into consideration, above all in relation to the role Shiho is firmly convinced she herself had in it. Considering how attached Shiho was to Akemi, and how her older sister's continued safety had been the biggest incentive for Shiho to have behaved herself especially in the past few years, her execution (delivered by Gin himself, once again cementing him as a big player in Shiho's trauma) definitely "breaks" her for good.

It's worth noting that the way Shiho breaks leads her to rebel against the system that's been suffocating her all along, but doing so is insanely hard and given the lack of a solid support system to fall back on, it doesn't go far: her actions aren't even that explosive— she announces that she will no longer work on the APTX until someone tells her the truth behind her sister's death— but they nonetheless elicit an extreme reaction from the Organization, thus further confirming its status as a massive threat to Shiho in her mind. Before the BO she is entirely powerless: they decide whether she's useful or not, they decide whether she's worth keeping alive, they decide what she should do, they decide that she's expendable the moment she displays independent wishes.

We have therefore unspecified abuse and grief accentuated by strong feelings of perceived responsibility re: the loss that transpired in addition to our first three big stars in the constellation behind most, if not all, of Shiho's trauma responses.

While frustrating to my perfectionist mind (everything must have a specific cause and if I do not make an effort to clarify or at least imply what it is in my work I perish; it definitely shines through via my poorly restrained desire to compensate for the chunks and details of Shiho's backstory we're missing), the fact that a great deal of what caused Shiho's trauma in the first place is quite nondescript at first glance, almost as if Shiho were trying to convince herself and others that "it's not a big deal" by rarely— if ever— bringing it up (and when she does she recounts the events matter-of-factly, as if she were largely unaffected by them), is something I've found myself appreciating more and more as the story progressed. Not because it truly isn't important, but because it can actually be pieced together through Shiho's every action, time and time again. At long last, a character whose trauma doesn't only make itself known when a specific trigger is at play, but rather pervades every single aspect of the survivor's life whether they're conscious of it or not.

Now, one thing I won't be doing is attempting to put a clinical label on what Shiho is experiencing: this is because her position in the manga is quite complex, and seeing as the plot itself isn't centered around her and her trauma, things aren't necessarily clear-cut. For example, Shiho did indeed get out of a stressful and traumatizing environment, but that doesn't mean she's out of danger for good just yet— if we were to attempt to categorize the symptoms she displays with the goal of making a diagnosis, we just wouldn't be able to do so due to the very much still present stressors and traumatic elements.

Applying a label to Shiho's experiences is also not the point of this post in the first place, and so I decided not to. I wanted to focus on the visible effects of her trauma, and how she's shown to be willing to at least try to break away from the mechanisms and mentality she's developed.

Which is how we get to the next section of this bad boy:

Haibara Ai And Living With Trauma

From the very moment we begin to learn about Sherry's backstory, her words and behaviors indicate a deeply rooted pessimistic outlook on her predicament— and quite possibly life itself. The very name she picked for her new identity specifically includes the Japanese character for 'sorrow', as opposed to that of 'love' suggested by Agasa. Even with said choice being played off as Shiho— now Ai— intentionally trying to unsettle Conan in every way she can, I can't help but read way too much into it and see a young woman who genuinely sees herself in that Kanji. Pain is all she is. Pain is all the world offers. It's inescapable the way a name is, and she made it into a reminder she's going to hear daily from now on.

It's also interesting how Ai brings up time and time again how Conan is the only one who can understand (and therefore help) her, with specific references to their shared predicament: Conan knows about the Organization, ended up shrunk because of the APTX, and has to constantly hide from them by playing the part of a grade schooler. While a freshly shrunk Shiho's options were insanely limited from the start, she still opted to head for Kudou Shinichi's house because in her mind he was the only person who could ever understand her situation by virtue of sharing the same experience.

As the plot slowly moves forward and we get to see more of Ai interacting with the world around her, multiple other things become very clear: an especially pronounced trait of hers is that she struggles to hold on to positive emotions and trains of thought, most notably very early on in the manga. She always finds a sour note even in the happiest of situations, because her thinking patterns cannot break out of that constant negative spiral— she is effectively still trapped, at least mentally.

As an additional example of this, even though she's been away from the traumatic environment for months, Ai cannot stop thinking about it (this can technically be countered by the fact that the danger itself isn't entirely gone. Shiho is safe for the time being, but the danger is always lurking somewhere. The problem is that she sees it everywhere instead, and cannot let go of the notion that she's going to get got if she relaxes even for a moment, which is what actually makes this kind of reaction encroach into unhealthy territory).

There's a also very obvious disconnect between her and her peers (both perceived— the Detective Boys— and real— other teenagers). To Ai, all these people are too naive for this world, and they aren't ready to handle its cruelty. She is quite defeatist in her outlook on life and has difficulties understanding how the people around her can be so optimistic, which in turn makes forming new bonds much harder for everyone involved: by keeping others at arm's length, Ai acts on the fear of having to experience a loss as devastating as her sister's ever again— here we have the avoidant aspect of her trauma reactions.

Speaking of: she also projects Akemi on Ran multiple times in canon, and always in contexts where danger and death are at the very least in the background. She's just like Akemi in that she decides to protect Shiho by putting her own life on the line. She's just like Akemi and like her she's going to die. Ai's reluctance to even introduce herself to Ran, and especially her shark-dolphin metaphor, is in my opinion pretty indicative of yet another tendency that can be found in trauma survivors, and that is the belief that there is something about yourself that is inherently dirty and shameful (traumatic event(s)), that sets you apart from normal, even good people, and it is a gap that can never be filled because you're now irreversibly damaged.

Dipping our toes into a more cliché detail re: the portrayal of trauma in media, let's not forget that Ai has nightmares featuring one of the sources of her trauma (and while Gosho kind of actually uses the Gin one as a "prophetic" dream, Conan does canonically comment on the fact that Ai is a night owl/doesn't sleep nearly enough, and we could interpret that as her being unwilling to fall asleep and risk yet more nightmares).

A considerable portion of Reunion With The Black Organization is dedicated to showing us just how much of an effect a single nightmare about Gin has on Ai. She's even more withdrawn than usual, prone to getting lost in her head (possibly even dissociating), receptive to the tiniest details that inevitably rouse her memory of the nightmare to the point she fails to assess the non-existent risk factor of her current situation and has a panicked outburst towards a very confused Ayumi, who did nothing apart from touching Ai's arm. Her emotional dysregulation in these panels shows us a clear see-saw between numbness, then mounting fear up to her breaking point (startle reaction), then an unfiltered externalization of her anguish that is ultimately played off as a joke so as to avoid further scrutiny from the Detective Boys.

We also get to see Ai's reaction to the mere sight of a black Porsche 356A, Gin's favorite car. The interesting part is that said man isn't even around at the time— this could be anyone's car. But it's still enough to trigger Ai's freeze response and put her on high alert. Later on, in The Four Porsches, we find out that said car doesn't even need to be a specific color for Ai to start spiraling, which is a pretty good example of how something innocuous and only vaguely analogous to past events can be more than enough to remind a survivor of their trauma.

Even with what little we are given, it's also laughably easy to tell how utterly terrified of "going back" or otherwise re-experiencing the effects of the environment she grew up in Ai is, which naturally includes an abject fear of the people that used to be around her. Ai's "sixth sense", although specifically primed to hone in on Organization operatives, feels to me like a magnified version of the hypervigilance that trauma survivors experience.

Surprisingly enough, as that isn't something I see often in media, we even see her considering (and attempting not once but twice) the ultimate escape as an option: killing herself (or letting herself be killed) would definitely solve all of Ai's problems. It'd free her from the constant fear and misery that characterize her every waking hour— and undoubtedly her sleep as well. It'd even rid all the wonderful, untainted people she somehow managed to surround herself with of the most dangerous burden they could have ever found themselves dragging around.

This constant devaluation of her person plays such a big part in selling Shiho's trauma, at least to me. It doesn't come off as edgy or disingenuous because it has solid roots in her past, in the things she's done and what she's been through. Sherry's value lied in her brain, her genius: in a way, even Ai's working on an antidote, producing prototype after prototype at a frankly insane rate for a person who's working alone and with fragmented data to start with, can be traced back to the unhealthy notions that have been drilled into her by the Organization. She actively relives her day-to-day life as Sherry after she's gotten out, and it's fine because it's familiar. She knows how this works much better than she knows how to hold a friendly conversation with a peer: she's back under pressure, but at least she's in control. And this way she can prove that she's good, that she's useful, that she's worth keeping around.

Truly, having reached this point, the question comes naturally: can it get better? The answer? Yes. Yes, it can.

The Ups And Downs Of Recovery, Between Healing And Fighting Back

Let's not kid ourselves: recovery is hardly a straight line. There's no magical fix-all cure that entirely erases someone's trauma and associated triggers in the blink of an eye simply because the current situation requires it, or because “it's been long enough” and other people just want them to get over it already. Trauma doesn't just “go away” because you really need it to. It doesn't stop affecting you, but there are ways to ensure it no longer takes over every moment of your life.

For Shiho, the first step towards recovery consists in acknowledging that 1) she is not alone anymore, and 2) she may be deathly afraid, but letting herself drown in that fear, only ever running away from it, isn't going to make things better.

Still, “fighting back” isn't all about acting like Conan. Ai is hardly expected to hunt down the Organization the way Conan does, and she honestly shouldn't be. Her experiences with the BO largely differ from Conan's, and even without taking that into consideration, different people may react very differently to traumatic events.

Ai's abject fear and general unwillingness to confront the Organization face to face (or investigating it in general) aren't a sign of weakness on her part, nor is it necessarily bad writing on Gosho's end. I am actually elated to see how consistent Ai is in her avoidance of those massive triggers. She rightfully wants to know when they're around, wants updates on their movements, but she loathes the idea of actively interacting or facing off against them even after Sherry's supposed death on the Mystery Train. Everything about the BO is bad news and bearer of bad memories, and she wants those reminders as far away from her as possible— which is an absolutely valid position for her to maintain.

However, in the eventuality that Ai decides to start facing her fears in a healthy, constructive way rather than as a way to get herself killed (which is in fact what eventually happens in canon), starting small is key— and it's to my delight that Gosho made a point of having Ai do just that. It takes her so, so long, but she decides to stop running because she's reached the conclusion that even if she does, she's never going to be truly safe and free (which is, coincidentally, what happens if trauma goes unaddressed); by refusing to go into Witness Protection, she acknowledges her fears but also the fact that she's not alone in facing them, and that she can't ever expect to find peace if she doesn't start doing just that.

Later on, during Black Impact, we see Ai being proactive and helping out in a small way by providing Jodie with the number she needs to call. Albeit tiny, the action doesn't go unnoticed by Conan, who comments on how unlike Ai that was, nor by Jodie, who shoots her a thumbs up. And here's the thing: of all people, Jodie is maybe the one who actually comes the closest to understanding at least some of Shiho's feelings, especially in regards to the abject isolation of having your family ripped away from you all at once (only to immediately find yourself in danger in return) and consequently the Witness Protection Program.

I'm definitely more than a little biased when I say I'm sad that Gosho didn't explore their parallels further, especially when Jodie herself canonically acknowledges their similarities as well as what sets them apart: unlike her, Ai refused to go into Witness Protection, because she's already found more than enough reasons to keep her in one place, and those reasons— those people— give her courage. It's pretty simplified, of course, because this isn't what the manga itself is about, but it is nonetheless a heartwarming moment that showcases how building meaningful relationships anew can literally be life-changing in the face of trauma. Regardless, I immensely appreciate the fact that these scenes exist at all.

Now, is this all there is to Ai’s path to recovery? Of course not. The Organization itself isn't the only thing weighing her down, after all: her grief and feelings of responsibility regarding Akemi's death play a big part in her day-to-day problems as well. To put one of my earlier observations about the visible consequences of Shiho's trauma to good use, let's jump back to The Mystery In The Net, where we see Ran initially remark on how Ai refuses to even look at her when they're near each other; at the tail end of the case, seemingly out of nowhere, Ai surprises the other girl by willingly introducing herself and offering a handshake. It's genuinely touching to see, most notably because we as readers are privy to information Ran doesn't have— she doesn't know how Ai sees her, nor how the little girl sees herself. She has no idea that what makes her a lovely person to interact with is exactly what's causing Ai to keep her distance, but we do, and Ai managing to put aside her fear and shame in order to reach out to someone like Ran is definitely a massive step forward as far as her interpersonal relationships go.

Along with all this progress, however, come many relapses— usually due to a close encounter with a member of the Organization. In these cases, but most importantly in their aftermath, we're shown just how debilitating Ai's trauma responses are. After The Mysterious Passenger, wherein Ai “only” spent her time in freeze mode because of how close she was to an Organization operative and then proceeded to try to stay behind on a bus that was about to explode because she'd convinced herself that only by dying could she do the right thing, we're plunged into a relatively low-stakes case where a small dog disappears. More than anything else, it's Ai's attitude, her words, and the things we find out through the Detective Boys and Agasa that paint the true haunting picture of the day. Ai has retreated into herself, unable to escape the vicious cycle of her negative mindset, and it's a wonder Agasa even managed to get her to step foot outside— all of this from a girl who was teasing the old inventor for catching a cold right before having to go skiing just a few days ago, seemingly completely at ease in her skin and with the world around her.

I'm not going to lie: this is the kind of up and down that only brings me closer to Ai. It is frustrating to see it happen, and that's good! That's exactly right! Because imagine if, instead of just witnessing it, you were the person this is happening to: opening up the tiniest bit, daring to stick your head outside because you think that maybe, just maybe, today is going to be a nice day, only to be sent spiraling right back into fight/flight/freeze mode and having to start the process of loosening up all over again. Rinse and repeat. It's infuriating. It's maddening. It's despair-inducing. Will it ever end?

That's what I love about Shiho, Sherry, Ai. This feels so real in a way I don't see often, and it's the reason why, despite all my gripes with Gosho's writing (particularly that of these last few years), I actually think he's done a pretty damn good job with Ai. Yes, even now that she's “so annoying”. Even now that she snaps and snarks and externalizes her emotions in a way that clearly doesn't appeal to everyone. Because that, too, can be what it looks like when someone starts taking their life back piece by piece: their personality, if carefully repressed in the past, begins to unfurl. And it's not always one-hundred percent pleasant, but honestly? I wouldn't expect it to be, especially not from someone like Shiho, and especially considering that yes, she's beginning to heal, but it's not a monitored process. She isn't actively being helped nor taught about ways to manage her trauma, and it's amazing that she's made so much progress on her own. It's amazing that she wants to live now (most days).

And it's going to get better. It's going to get better, and she's going to be there for it.

#Hhhhhi. I am. Normal about this :)#I definitely didn't include everything I wanted to. The evolution of Ai's attitude towards Okiya didn't make it in for example #Or how Ai constantly attempting to sacrifice herself post-Reunion With The BO could be seen as reenactment of her trauma re: almost dying #But man. MAN. Does it feel good to put my thoughts in order. Now I have them in a neat little gdoc for when I want to cry abt Shiho /silly #Anyway!!!! If any of yall decide to read this: whoops (there were supposed to be manga panels but tumblr flagged those as nsfw?? Rip) hehe #iiii love Shiho. I love Ai. I loveeee herrrrr :3:3:3:3:3:3:3:333 #dcmk #detco #detective conan #yapping time #miyano shiho #haibara ai #character analysis

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simmerianne93 · 2 months ago

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[Simmerianne93]Fantasy_poses_21

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Hello everyone!! How are you today???

Sometimes less is more... and this time is one of those times...

I'm here again with a pack in a random hour haha... and as I said, it will be like that while I figure out how to go back to my normal posting hours, with all the power outages.

Here's a new fantasy posepack!! I haven't brought one in a couple of months, and I wanted to finish this pack I started a while back and that I had left in my "work in progress" folder...

They are 12 really basic poses... and I say basics 'cause they have slight movements between eachother... but as I said, sometimes less is more, and in this case I thought about a badass character that barely moves but is really powerful... Yeah, maybe I'm a little bit influenced by the amount of manga I've read and anime I've watched... but I wanted to give that vibes... and I hope you like it as well as I do.

They could be more, but I didn't want to extend that much... perhaps, I can make another similar posepack in the future with much more badass magical poses.

Another good thing is that I thought about this poses to be use by a spellcaster, but they can also be use by a badass vampire... 😏 I know a few people that will use them with vampires... you know who you are...

By the way!! You can combine some of my other fantasy, action or reaction poses to make an awesome fight!!... I actually used one of my first fantasy poses for the white head sim in the cover 😜

Anyway... I hope you like them!!

Have fun with them!!

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What is on it?

12 solo poses (Made with a male rig) + 1 all in one.

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What do you need?

Andrew's poses player

Teleport any sim by Scumbumbo or Mccc by deaderpool.

OPTIONAL: Igor's magic effect

OPTIONAL: Natalia Auditore's Magic ball

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Instructions in the original post.

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TOU

Do not claim my creations as your own.

Do not re-upload or modify my creations.

Do not make money of my creations.

Do not include my creations in Mods folders to download.

Please follow my Term Of Use.

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Download it now here — [Early Access until April 20th, 2025]

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If you want to support me: Patreon | Ko-fi

All my poses overview: Pinterest | Wix | Tumblr

More in-game preview pics of all my poses: Instagram

My socials: Twitter | BlueSky | Instagram | Tumblr

Lives and videos: Youtube

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I really hope you like them and I will say in advance: Thank you so much for using them.

@ts4-poses

#poses #simmerianne93 #ts4 #sims4poses #thesims4 #posesforsims #sims4 #thesims #ts4poses #creator content #fantasyposes #spellcasterposes #magicposes #vampireposes #soloposes #accessoryposes

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demonslayedher · 4 months ago

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What even is Kimetsu no Yaiba canon???

Good question, that's why I've done all this digging. But I've also been asked a lot about what officially released material is and is not considered canon. I am but one nerd on the internet and no authority on that and my attitude is that you should take and pick what you want to use in fan work, because it's yours. However, in a lot of my fics I love trying to stick to canon, and that also means trying to incorporate a lot of official material that Gotouge did not personally provide.

So instead of saying "this is canon, that is not canon," here is my tier list. This is especially relevant when you have two officially released materials that contradict each other. The manga has been self-contradictory too, so if you sweat too many small details, your fan work will never get done.

God-touge Tier: Content Penned by the Gator 1. The actual manga chapters, for this may be all someone has ever followed in the Shonen Jump magazines, and therefore they have no other context 2. All other material published in the 23 volumes, including Taisho Secrets, 4-panel comics, and expanded epilogue chapters 3. The two official fanbooks (also referred to by the fandom as under names like the databooks or encyclopedias), which are widely available in Japan, and (as I understand) have been at least partially translated into an official English version 4. Additional material provided for special events, like the Gotouge gallery and Mugen Ressha movie booklet for early showings (these have included Taisho Secrets not printed elsewhere)

Extremely Influential Tier: The Ufotable Anime Content 1. Ufotable's interpretation of the manga (except in cases when it contradicts Gotouge material, though these are slight, like animating a scene in the wrong season) in the TV episodes and movies as they first aired, including filler scenes based on but not found in Gotouge material (like the paper airplane contest) 2. Additional content Ufotable added later (like extra scenes for when the first arc was re-aired on Fuji TV) 3. Filler content only loosely based on the manga (like the Rengoku special)

Also Very Highly Regarded Tier: Official In-Universe Spin-Offs On the Same Shelves at Japanese Bookstores (none written by Gotouge) 1. The Tomioka and Rengoku Gaidens (except in cases when it contradicts Gotouge material, like how Rengoku got that hair color) 2. The light novels 3. Novelizations of the manga Like High-Quality Fanfiction: More Ufotable and Shueisha Content 1. Drama CDs produced by Ufotable (often just little side stories and character exploration, not major stories) 2. Kimetsu Academy, a.k.a. the official AU Spin-Off, and by extension, the "Total Concentration Drill" books that are a spin-off of the Kimetsu Academy spin-off 3. Additional art books and design books (though these are usually very careful to not introduce anything new, and merely reflect content already shown elsewhere) 4. Sometimes I am really tempted to put the Rengoku special all the way down here

Official material which I do not consider to have any baring on canon whatsoever, but which are simply fun and nice: 1. Any form of live stage performance (the musicals, the voice actors reading from scripts, concerts, the Noh adaptations, etc.) 2. Officially sanctioned games, especially the plot elements in a video game like the Hinokami Chronicles 3. Galleries like Zenshuuchuu-ten (though these usually stay entirely based on material already introduced in anime canon) 4. Tie-in collaborations 5. Any form of official sanctioned parody created by someone other than Gotouge (like the 4-panel comics compiled into a volume with the Gaidens) 6. Commentary from the directors, voice actors, etc.

Unofficial material which is fun for expanding on things but has zero baring on canon, nor should it have any influence on what the aforementioned officially sanctioned creators do with it: 1. Books that nerds have published with Kimetsu no Yaiba analysis while teaching fun facts about the Taisho period and demons and such (this is a bit of a trend in Japan, and maybe other countries have publications unabashedly capitalizing on the KnY trend) 2. Fans who create meta and headcanons 3. Fans who create fanwork out of love for the series, regardless of whether or not they stick to canon Things that make me say "nope" 1. Low-effort articles and videos that get the facts wrong 2. Fans who spread rumors by claiming something is canon, but that something is reflected nowhere in the aforementioned top four tiers 3. Anything AI-generated

#hope that clears it up for people who have asked 'is XYZ canon?'#'yes but also no' is how the reaction gif with the pirate goes right?#basic advice: strive for Gotouge canon above all else but otherwise chose what works for what you want to do with it!#fanwork is for fun #kny fandom theories and meta #kny nerdery

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sweetreasures · 11 months ago

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So…you want to know more about Korean shipping terminology (and how does this apply to Ateez?)

Luckily, I have spent the better part of six years of my life learning Korean! Which fortunately(?) means that I have learned plenty about the lingo Korean BL fans use re: shipping dynamics. Actually, this makes it SO MUCH easier to navigate websites like Twitter, where NSFW posting is censored for security reasonable. The difference is that English speakers do not have an organized method of referring to the members in their ships (for example, one user might write seongjoong as secngjccng where one might instead write sxxngjxxng, and where another one might even write sngjng, etc etc). But how do Korean speakers handle this situation? What is the context behind all of this? I will provide with you with a fun and easy chart at the end, but first….Let me explain:

Taking you back to the early 2000s

Our setting: the early Korean BL online forums. The terminology originating from these spaces were unsurprisingly heavily influenced by the original sources from which BL manga was derived: the Japanese language. Japanese has a system of Chinese characters used to simplify the writing process known as Kanji. Korean has a similar concept, known as Hanja. Where as Kanji is still heavily utilized to this day for a variety of reasons (my Japanese teacher would always say its main purpose is to minimize the amount of script needed to convey an idea), Hanja has largely fallen out of fashion—used primarily to clarify homophones in text, in literature such as novels and older writings, and as a stylistic choice to depict words such as Death and God, etc.

First, I’m going to give you some terms that are familiar to quite possibly all of you.

Seme (攻め) - the dominant figure in the relationship. Most often, this person will also be depicted as the top.

Uke (受け) - the submissive figure in the relationship. Most often, this person will also be depicted as the bottom.

Are you following so far? Great! In the most stereotypical depiction of homosexual relationships in Manhwa, these roles—the dom top and the sub bottom—reigned supreme so much so that eventually the community fell into the pitfall of believing these four terms to be interchangeable. While simplifying the process of understanding each person’s role in sexual intimacy, it also didn’t lend much of an allowance to explore ideas that defined this view of sexuality. This lack of nuance and flexibility has very little to do with why I’m writing today, but I do want to give some more context as to why these terms became such reliable shorthand.

Anyway…

In Korean BL spaces, these Kanji symbols (攻/受) were directly translated into 공 and 수, respectively. 공 literally means “Ball” but in the context of the Hanja, it means “attack” or “strong”, basically dominant top. 수—“Number”—“to submit” or “to receive”—submissive bottom. Don’t worry, this is the absolute last time I will be explaining these ideas.

How does this work in Korean BL spaces?

Now this may also be familiar to many of you: the placement of each figure in the ship name MATTERS! In SFW spaces, you can get away with referring to Yunho and Mingi as Yungi because….well….platonic friendships aren’t normally referred to by dominance dynamics. In NSFW spaces, specifically dealing with fictional depictions of gay sex, referring to Yunho and Mingi as YunGi will have most people assuming that you mean fanfictions in which Yunho is the top and Mingi is the bottom. Oh, you didn’t? Well, obviously you meant to say MinYun (or MingYun or MingHo, I’ve seen this written all kinds of ways tbh). See what I mean? Now this isn’t always the case—familiarity is everything, so it’s not uncommon to see Wooyoung and San referenced as WooSan, no matter who is intended to be the top.

In Korean, ship names are almost always written in order of placement. For example, 윤낫 (we will get into why the Hangul in San’s name is reversed later) would refer to a Yunho x San pairing where Yunho is the top and San is the bottom. Likewise, 낫윤 would imply the exact opposite. Anyone want to take a stab at what 밍웡 means? How about 섷쫑?

2010-2024, A minor shift in focus

As the spaces for these conversations grow and change with time, as did the terminology used to describe shipping dynamics and pairings.

If you are a fourth and fifth gen K-pop stan, you know what a coupling, or chemi, name is. Korean fans who did either did not want to discuss their idols in a romantic/sexual manner, or otherwise wanted some way to differentiate a typical shipping name from a platonic pairing name, developed the concept of using a chemi name instead. For Ateez, these would be:

E-Kang-Mo (에강모) / Yunho and Yeosang - the shortened version of 에이티즈 강아지 모임, literally translating into the Gathering of Ateez Puppies.

Matz (맏즈) / Seonghwa and Hongjoong - TWO MEN WE’RE ON FIRE 위험해‼️‼️‼️ Shortened version of 맏형 which literally translates into Oldest brothers. This quite obviously refers to our two oldest members within the group.

Elsewhere, you may come across 삼복즈, Jiwoong and Yujin from ZEROBASEONE. Or 채채즈, Chaewon and Eunchae from LE SSERAFIM. Usually this name is derived from some personality aspect or moment the two idols share, and can be given organically by fans or by the idols themselves. They are used strictly by both Korean and international fans as a means of referring to these idols and their friendships. It’s still possible that you find a fan who skips the whole “having to learn a completely different unit name” thing and just uses the traditional pairing name (I know, because I’m one of them), and in this case you can likely tell exactly when they first got into K-pop.

During this decade, shippers developed two more terms to further break down sexual dynamics, this time focusing on top/bottom. 왼 is the Korean directional word for “left”, and in the context of BL, means top. For bottom, Koreans use a shortened version of the directional word for “right”—른. I am not entirely sure whether the general consensus seems to be that these terms are still strictly tied to the idea of a dominant top and a submissive bottom, as most of the resources I used to search for these terms waffled on the subject.

In practice, 웡왼 will refer to shippings in which Wooyoung is a top (I searched for this on Twitter and came up unsurprisingly short….) and 쫑른 is in reference to shippings where Jongho is a bottom!

Enough Already!! Just give us the tags!!

Loud and clear, boss. However, I just need a bit more contextual information out there before I finally get into the list:

Variations - there are few variations that exist within the Korean shipping fandom, save for instances in which another pairing could possibly exist within a different group.

Censorship - Korean fans are also heavy on making sure these posts do not make it into the hands of Ateez themselves (see: the chaos that happened when San stumbled across self-insert fiction written by K-Atiny). Member names are not written properly, and will always be altered in some way as a means of masking it from normal search results. Please pay attention to this!

Pronunciation - some letters are altered in the pairing names as a means to aid with pronunciation. This is sort of an intuitive thing with Korean, so I’m not sure how to explain this in a better way.

And now…the list!

Here’s how to follow the chart:

Reading from the top down, you will find the 른—or pairings where the member is the bottom. For example, Seonghwa’s column reads:

홍섷 - Hongjoong x Seonghwa

윤섷 - Yunho x Seonghwa

솽섷 - Yeosang x Seonghwa

낫섷 - San x Seonghwa

밍섷 - Mingi x Seonghwa

웡섷 - Wooyoung x Seonghwa

��섷 - Jongho x Seonghwa

Likewise, reading the chart horizontally will provide you with the 왼—or pairings where the member is the top. For example, Mingi’s row reads:

밍섷 - Mingi x Seonghwa

솜몽 - Mingi x Hongjoong

밍윦 - Mingi x Yunho

솜여 - Mingi x Yeosang

밍낫 - Mingi x San

밍웡 - Mingi x Wooyoung

솜쫑 - Mingi x Jongho

Additionally, adding (Member name)른/왼 will provide you more general posts where Korean fans are discussing the idol as a top or a bottom in general without referring to a specific ship.

Hongjoong: 홍왼 + 홍른

Seonghwa: 섷왼 + 섷른

Yunho: 윦왼/윤왼 + 윦른/윤른

Yeosang: 솽왼 + 솽른

San: 낫왼 + 낫른

Mingi: 밍왼 + 밍른

Wooyoung: 웡왼 + 웡른

Jongho: 쫑왼 + 쫑른

Thank you for reading! I hope this was as useful for you as it was for me! Of course, I knew a lot of history regarding this topic due to the ample time I spent reading BL, but I will admit that I did not have much time to research this topic specifically. However, if you have any corrections to make, let me know!! This was so much fun for write, and maybe I can do something similar to this in the future as well.

Bye!

#ateez #halia speaks #ateez rps #hongjoong #seonghwa #yunho #yeosang #san #mingi #wooyoung #jongho #ateez fluff #ateez smut #ateez angst #woosan #seongjoong #jongsang #yunwoo #yunsang #yunsan

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wanderlust-in-my-soul · 5 months ago

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2024 BL Wrap Up

Welcome to my 2024 bl Wrap Up!

A quick look at my stats this year, so that we can get it over with: I watched 60 BLs, most of which are from 2024. 24 of them came from Thailand, 15 from Japan, 14 from South Korea, six from Taiwan and one from China. I created 209 gifsets and had to deal with several heartbreaks.

Somehow 2024 was an intense year for BLs, at least for me. Even though I watched significantly less than in 2023 and skipped many series to save them for later, many of the series I watched touched me, both positively and negatively.

But what did the year actually look like for me? What are my thoughts today, looking back on 2024?

China, Japan and South Korea fought it out to see who could bring the saddest characters to life and write the saddest stories. On the one hand, we have China's re-entry into the BL world with Blue Canvas Of Youthful Days.

A series whose characters have suffered so much, healed together, supported each other, only to end up with a double noble idiocy and and a time skip so they see each other again in the last two minutes of the series and we get a half-hearted happy ending. I would have loved this series much more without this giving up your own happiness in hopes the other one is happy. Just talk to each other and find a solution together. Please.

Secondly, there is Our Youth from Japan.

Both characters suffer at the hands of their parents. One with domestic violence, prejudices and hatred and the other with absent parents, disinterest in his own personality, prejudices and separating parents. In both cases, they are neglected and find the support and trust in each other that they miss in the world. They feel misunderstood and learn about their own desires and needs through their affection for each other. The series is not yet finished, but it is one of the bluest series this year.

But Japan is not entering the race with just one series. Happy To The End is also a contender for a top spot at the Hurt-Mountain.

The story of two maltreated souls who somehow manage to find a little love and trust in a life full of darkness and pain. The series had left me with strong feelings and a dear friend gifted me the Mangas for Christmas. I can't wait to dive into their story again! And don't forget our super-villain of the year! This series had it all!

South Korea entered the race with Let Free The Curse Of Taekwondo.

I don't know who suffered more in the end, us as viewers who watched the suffering of both protagonists without being able to give them a warming hug and to tell them everything is going to be fine or the protagonists themselves and their attempts to hold up their own walls and tear down the other one’s. Those two have come a long way to at least talk to each other again. Such a good storytelling!

Meanwhile, Thailand thought it would be nice to start a little competition to see which of their series could be the fluffiest of them all. ThamePo is not included in this calculation, because I'm too biased when it comes to this series. They could present me green slime dancing in the rain while Po is staring at it lovingly, and I would celebrate it.

At first, I thought Every You, Every Me was going to easily win the race, but suddenly, they bring in death and the series is elevated to a weird, way too complex and under-explained meta-level where actors are trying to end their relationship because reasons?

I would have liked to have seen more of the multiverses in which our soulmates fall in love with each other again and again. The first four episodes were so good and so different than our usual bls. I couldn't stop loving it. But I guess the trophy will go to Your Sky after all in this case.

God, I'm blushing and giggling to myself with every episode. Fah and Rak are just so cute together. The series is pure fluff so far and even though I don't know what to expect from the remaining episodes, I know that the two of them will surely be happy together in the end.

The award for best performance goes by far to War Wanarat from Jack & Joker.

His diversity and ability to immerse himself in the different personas and play them believably was great cinema this year. The series might have some plot-holes or characters who could have had more screen time together, but the series was interesting and Joke was the best!

And while we're on the subject of Jack & Joker and Your Sky, let's move on to the trophy for this year's best kiss. The crown would have gone to Jack & Joker, but then Your Sky came around the corner with this great first kiss and wow. I was in a bit of a quandary until I remembered that this is my recap. So I'll just make two categories.

The best and softest first kiss this year goes to Your Sky.

The best and hungriest first kiss this year goes to Jack & Joker.

Kidnap didn't necessarily have an exciting and well thought-out plot, but Ohm's Puppy Eyes were unbeatable.

And yet ThamePo clearly won the staring contest with only three episode aired. I mean, hello? Who wouldn't fall head over heels in love with one of them when they look at you like that?

And contrary to all assumptions, neither Kidnap nor ThamePo has the biggest baby girl of the year! No, this is what Taiwan brought to the screen with The On1y One and let's not kid ourselves, Tian loved making everything possible for his Wang and taking care of him.

And who would have thought that the most romantic scene of the year came just close before the year ends? ThamePo! What have you done you beautiful, beautiful series! And how could the remembering of a phone number be the most romantic shit of the year? And yet here I am loving everything about this scene and the series. Oh the wait was so worth it!

While in most cases it was clear that the couples would get together at the end of the series and our little BL bubble would remain intact, Japan made it a little harder for us to predict a happy ending. 25 Ji, Akasaka de probably thought it was funny to play with our emotions like that. My Strawberry Film was probably lying in the corner, laughing at the fact that we believed its misdirections about being a bl. And in Hidamari ga Kikoeru, they remembered at the end that it is a bl and that the audience has been waiting for a long time to see the protagonists together in a scene again and conjured up an unspectacular happy ending with one of the most uncomfortable looking hugs in bl history.

Taiwan, on the other hand, didn't care whether their series had a happy ending or not and simply cut one of the best series of the year with strong acting and a great story in the middle without knowing whether there would be a second season.

And so The On1y One hangs somewhere in cliffhanger limbo and we viewers are desperate enough to search the internet for bad English translations of the story to at least find a little bit of closure. It's worth reading the bad translation though.

And while the world around me was already falling apart, Taiwan and South Korea were fighting over who could tear my heart into smaller pieces by the end of the series. While I was obsessed with Unknown and even bought the final episodes as early excess,

Love For Love's Sake managed to crush my heart into the finest powder. Never before have I been so heartbroken as after this series. I didn't know what to do with myself and my emotions for days. It was terrifying and yet so beautiful. One of the strongest heartbreaks I've ever felt. Clearly the best series this year for me.

Quietly and secretly, Thailand then surprised us with a pretty good adaptation of the much-loved Japanese classic Cherry Magic. And Tay and New surprised me with the fact that they can actually kiss each other without looking like they're in pain. The chemistry was on point and their love scene at the end... wow!

I also discovered a new format for myself in 2024. While I've always stayed away from watching shows on my phone because it's just too small, I came across Match Play on social media and just knew I had to watch it.

And that's how I slipped into the universe of vertical mini-series. My ADHD brain is happy about the short, entertaining nature of the episodes. And yet I was so hooked by the series that it's now my most rewatched show. And that's despite the fact that I don't really like doing that, i.e. repeating series. But I can watch it whenever, whereever.

I was able to watch with my best friend how two people fell in love with each other and are still together and happy.

The Boyfriend was an experience that I would never want to miss, not only do my friend and I now regularly watch shows together, but the show briefly gave me back my faith in love, not for me, but in general.

I finally found another show this year where I really liked OffGun.

The Trainee was a great show with good humor, great characters, honest problems, and an Off that I actually liked in his role. I don't often get that with him.

I had to learn once again that South Korea is not yet ready to introduce a queer couple in one of their big productions. The hints were there and so was the chemistry!

But unfortunately there was no happy ending for my poor heart and Sergeant Kim in Sweet Home 3. But he did make it onto my phone as a wallpaper. That's something too, isn't it?

But South Korea also surprised and sent a terrific adaptation of the novel Love In The Big City to the screen with a cast to be proud of and a story that was worthy of being filmed so well. The biggest plot twist for me came when it was revealed that No YeongSu was a toxic and utterly homophobic asshole. God, I loved the two of them together and would have loved to see No YeongSu come to terms with his own sexuality, but the show has just been too realistic for that. But their scenes together? Chef's kiss! The best lift of the year!

But not everything that tried to shine this year was gold.

On the dark side, Japan and Thailand both tried to piss me off this year by letting series that started so well and would have definitely been my favorites, had they kept it up, hit the wall in the middle or near the end. Seriously Thailand, what was that about Last Twilight? And Japan, I hear the sunspot was so good until you decided to put in a character that was so unlikable that many of us just got angry and until you decided that our protagonists just couldn't have any positive character development and just stopped communicating with each other. And that had been their strength all along!

Wandee Goodday wanted to be this cool show, with sex positivity and sex buddies, but quickly became a romantic sludge that was as predictable as every other GmmTV story. I'm not saying that's always a bad thing, just a little unnecessarily schmaltzy and sweet at times.

South Korea gave us a brief scare once when it thought it wanted to produce a series together with Thailand. I don't know, but I just can't take Mew seriously since then. Love Is Like A Cat was bad. The acting was really bad, the plot didn't know what it was supposed to do on set any more and it simply left midway through the series, never to be seen again.

Unfortunately, this didn't improve the acting and so it was more a case of just not giving up. Sometimes I also wonder what's wrong with me that I keep watching those series and why I'm doing this to myself (yes, I'm looking at you Dinosaur Love).

What 2024 really had a few of, however, were stories with a very unique plot. There's Love For Love's Sake, where someone gets a second chance through a computer game. Or Century Of Love, in which a centenarian in a young body waits for the love of his life and is surprised when they are reborn as a man.

Or Caged Again. I'll wait until I can binge it myself, but the story of a penguin and a panther who fall in love as humans sounds great! Or 4 Minutes, in which time was so confusing that I lost track at one point. Or who could forget our first Omegaverse series Pit Babe?

Which was somehow a little lacking in Omegas and made people questioning everything after finding out that Pavel wouldn’t be on top. Or Playboyy, a series that I think is underrated and which style is so artistically pleasing. Yes, the story was messy af, but the manner in which this series was shot and filmed was exquisite. And Love In The Big City and The Nipple Talk, two very good, very adult series that I wish could get more attention.

All in all, 2024 was a great year with interesting stories and fascinating characters that I will certainly be returning to from time to time.

And with you, my dear friends and followers, creators and viewers. Your presence in 2024 has sweetened my year and made my feed happy! Thank you to all of you out there!

May 2025 treat you well and delight us all with great new stories!

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