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gods-favorite-autistic · 2 years

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Incorrect Heroes Of Olympus:

(Starting with couples, going into trios, then mixing them all together)

Percy: So are we flirting right now?

Annabeth: I AM LITERALLY SPARRING WITH YOU

Percy: That doesn’t answer my question

Will, tending to Nico’s wounds: How would you rate your pain?

Nico: Zero stars. Would NOT recommend.

Nico: I prevented a murder today.

Will: Really? How’d you do that?

Nico: Self control.

Percy: Am I in trouble?

Annabeth: Take a guess.

Percy: No?

Annabeth: Take another guess.

Nico: *Walking in to a room* Sorry I’m late... I was... doing things.

*Sounds of running footsteps progressively getting louder*

Leo: *Out of breath* HE PUSHED ME DOWN THE FUCKIN’ STAIRS.

Jason: I know you’re deflecting by making jokes about how hot you are.

Piper: It’s not a joke.

Piper: *sniffles*

Piper: I’m a legit snack.

Percy: Remember when you didn't try to solve all your problems with attempted murder?

Nico: Stop romanticizing the past.

Leo: I can explain.

Jason: Can you?

Leo: If you give me thirty seconds to think of a lie.

Leo: Lol heads up if you try to make a candle with food coloring, the food coloring will just sink to the bottom of the glass, and when the flame eventually reaches the bottom all the food coloring will catch fire and become one giant tall flame that you cannot possibly blow out and the glass will start to crack and then you'll throw your tea on it in a panic and then the extremely hot food coloring will boil and sizzle horribly and then the glass will shatter. Please take my word on this lmfao

Frank: What did you do Leo?

Leo: A MISTAKE

Frank: YOU CAN CONTROL FIRE-

Hazel, while making a plan: I was thinking I'd do some magic-

Leo, instantly: You? Magic? Hazel, it says talent show.

Jason: Reyna! Reyna! Whaddya call a fish with no eye?

Reyna, not looking up: Myxine Circifrons

Jason:

Jason: fsh

Annabeth: This is such a bad idea.

Percy: Then why are you coming along?

Annabeth: One of us need to be able to talk the cops out of arresting us when this inevitably goes wrong.

Leo after the ‘saving Nico’ scene: Top 30 reasons why Leo is sorry... Number 5 will surprise you!

Hazel: Top 30 anime deaths. Number One: YOUR FUCKING ASS RIGHT NOW!!!

Piper: Ok, maybe playing ‘whose family is most dysfunctional’ wasn’t the best idea we’ve had. Leo’s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can’t get him out...

Grover: Are you sure this is the right direction?

Percy: Certainly, I'm as sure as I am smart!

Annabeth: In that case, we're definitely lost.

Leo, feral: Here’s a fun Christmas idea. We hang mistletoe, but instead of kissing, you have to FIGHT whoever else is under it.

Jason: Leo no.

Piper: Mistlefoe!

Jason: Please stop encouraging him.

Nico: Hey, Frank? Can I get some dating advice?

Frank: Just because I’m with Hazel doesn’t mean I know how I did it.

Leo: So, what, now I’m just supposed to do anything that Annabeth does? I mean, what if they jumped off a cliff?

Jason: If Annabeth were to jump off a cliff, she would’ve done her due diligence regarding the height of the cliff, the depth of the water, and the angle of entry, so yes. If you see Annabeth jump off a cliff, by all means, jump off a cliff.

Leo: You jump off a cliff!

Jason: Gladly. Provided Annabeth did first.

Annabeth: Last time I jumped off a cliff I fell into Tartarus so maybe don’t-

Reyna: You have to apologize to Will

Nico: Fine.

Nico: 'Unfuck you' or whatever.

Piper: We need a distraction.

Jason: Is anyone here good at jumping up and down and making weird noises?

Leo, whispering: My time has come

Percy, driving Leo and Piper: So how was your day?

Leo: We almost got surprise adopted!

Percy: What?

Piper: We almost got kidnapped.

Percy: Oh, okay.

Percy: *slams on the breaks* WAIT WHAT?!

*The 7 is having dinner together*

Jason: Leo, can you pass the salt?

Leo: *Throws Nico across the table*

'Can I copy the homework?'

Frank and Hazel: I can help you with it!

Jason: Yeah, sure.

Piper: Bold of you to assume I did the homework.

Percy, stepson of the teacher: lol nope.

Leo: Wait, we had homework?!?!?!

Nico: *Read 5:55pm*

Leo: Everytime I hear someone talking about updog, I’m torn between not wanting to fall for it and wanting to help them complete their joke.

Annabeth: Okay, but what is updog?

Hazel: Updog is a long sausage in a bun, often served with ketchup, mustard, onions, and/or relish.

Frank: Not, that’s a hot dog. An updog is when a new version or patch of an application is released.

Piper: No, that's an update. You’re thinking of the fourth largest city in Sweden.

Percy: Surely, that’s Uppsala, where’s updog is the giant spider in Harry Potter.

Jason: That’s Aragog. Updog is a symbol conventionally used for an arbitrarily small number in analysis proofs.

Nico: You’re thinking of epsilon. Updog is an upward-moving air current.

Leo: No, that’s an updraft. An updog is the modern version of a henway.

Annabeth: What’s a henway??

Leo: Oh, about five pounds.

Gaea: Well, aren’t you all a rag-tag group of adventurers with unclear goals and good hearts! Oh, let me guess: you’re out to save the world!

Percy: Well, actually, that sounds like a pretty fair assessment.

Jason: More or less, I guess...

Hazel: That sounds awesome! Let’s do that!

Frank: I’m new here, but I am open to the concept.

Leo: I thought that’s what we were doing, guys, come on!

Percy: Croissants: dropped

Frank: Road: works ahead

Piper: BBQ sauce: on my titties

Jason: Shavacado: fre

Leo: Miss Keisha: fuckin dead

Hazel:

Hazel, grumpy: I didn’t understand a single word of that and I hate every single one of you.

Percy, walking into their house: Hello, people who do not live here.

Nico: Hey.

Frank: Hi.

Hazel: Hello.

Piper: Hey!

Percy: I gave you the key to my place for emergencies only!

Leo: We were out of Doritos.

Piper: Time for plan G.

Annabeth: Don’t you mean plan B?

Piper: No, we tried plan B a long time ago. I had to skip over plan C due to technical difficulties.

Jason: What about plan D?

Piper: Plan D was that desperate disguise attempt half an hour ago.

Hazel: What about plan E?

Piper: I’m hoping not to use it. Leo dies again in plan E.

Nico: I like plan E.

Jason: Dumbest scar stories, go!

Percy: I burned my tongue once drinking tea.

Piper: I dropped a hair dryer on my leg once and burned it.

Annabeth: I have a piece of graphite in my leg for accidentally stabbing myself with a pencil in the first grade.

Hazel: I was taking a cup of noodles out of the microwave and spilled it on my hand and I got a really bad burn.

Leo:

Leo: I have emotional scars.

Nico: Who the fuck added me to a fucking group chat?

Annabeth: >:O language

Frank: Yeah watch your fucking language

Jason: OKAY WHO TAUGHT FRANK THE FUCK WORD?

Leo: 'The fuck word'.

Hazel: Are you stupid? You guys use the f word all the time

Percy: Oh my god they censored it

Leo: Say fuck, Hazel.

Piper: Do it, Hazel. Say fuck.

*Squad reactions to being told ‘I love you’*

Percy: Thanks fam!

Piper: oh no

Frank: *cries* I love you too

Leo: Sounds fake but okay

Hazel: *A flustered mess*

Annabeth: can i get a refund

Percy: *Posts a super low-quality image to the group chat*

Nico: If I had a dollar for every pixel in this image, I’d have 15 cents

Percy: If I had a dollar for every ounce of rage I felt in my body after I read this text, I would have enough money to buy a cannon to fire at you

Annabeth: Actually I did the math, Nico would have $225, not $0.15.

Nico: Fam I’m right here....

Piper: If I had a dollar I would buy a can of soda :)

Hazel: while you’re there could you buy me an apply juice please?

Piper: Sorry I only have a dollar

Leo: :(

Jason: Hey I just realized Leo is right, Nico would have $22,500 because it's a dollar for every pixel, not a cent

Hazel: If I had $22,500 I would buy a can of soda and an apply juice

Jason: You can buy anything you want with $22,500

Piper: Yeah and she wants soda and apply juice

Frank: Apply juice to what

Leo: Directly to the forehead

Annabeth: Great chat everyone

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umbran6 · 3 years

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The Argument Against Caleo

Spoilers up to Blood of Olympus and beyond. Beware! (Or not, the book series has been out for a few years, get over it). I wrote this after seeing a user wondering why people didn’t like Caleo, or in some cases, hated it. Here, I want to explain the answer as much as possible while doling out my own points.

One of the main grievances I have as a fan of Leo Valdez would be the ship Caleo, or Leo x Calypso. It’s a complicated ship, to say the least, with multiple issues that make me question why people like the ship. And I admit it, they initially had some chemistry, but there’s multiple issues that Uncle Rick produced through making such a relationship that makes it extremely open to criticism, criticism which I will explain through this post.

One of my main points against them is that the ship was created on a very limited time scale. Although we aren’t given an exact date to date of when Leo and Calypso met to when they fell in love, we can safely estimate it to be a week at best. Such a limited amount of time from going through the multiple stages of a relationship already stresses the limits of the suspension of disbelief.

A counterexample would be Percabeth, or Percy x Annabeth. Throughout the series, we aren’t introduced to them being romantically involved until the Titan’s Curse, which was two years after they met. Specifically, this is brought up by Aphrodite, the goddess of love herself. Admittedly, Percy and Annabeth were twelve years old when they first met, when romance was definitely out of the picture, especially with a quest to get the Master Bolt.

However, from there we get to see multiple examples of their character depth, ranging from their respective fatal flaws to their ambitions, hopes and dreams, and their friendship. We get to see the slow build up of their chemistry, which was a really good writing move on Uncle Rick’s part. These characters took their sweet time to get to where they wanted to go, and despite the false romantic lead of Rachel, they still got together.

On the other hand, we don’t see enough of this between Leo and Calypso — we only see one book where they interacted with each other in The House of Hades, and that was only for a handful of chapters. While they are definitely older so they can jump straight to romance (some may say too old, but I’ll get to that) its still a pretty huge gap to jump through without making it stick. This makes it hard to root for a ship when it is built on a rather faulty foundation from the ‘they just met’ to ‘they get together’, especially when they don’t have a lot of events to show their chemistry.

Which brings me to Ogygia, which has raised a few red flags for me when looking at it from a retrospective point of view. Now, we know what the main issue of the island is that the hero who landed on said island can’t leave until Calypso falls in love with them. And we’ve seen this with Percy during the Battle of the Labyrinth, where he lands in the island and Calypso falls in love with him while tending to his wounds from, you know, being erupted from freaking Mt. St. Helens. Needless to say, this falling in love with each other montage happened quickly to the point of suspicion, which sets up the complication that Calypso and Leo might have fallen in love due to magical intervention.

And hear me out, because although this might be a pretty big pill to swallow, we have evidence for this through Percy. It only takes one chapter for Calypso and Percy to meet, and the next he’s willing to consider leaving Camp Half-Blood and Annabeth behind to live on the island when Hephaestus gives him the choice to leave Ogygia or stay. We don’t even get an explanation on why Percy considered giving it all up just so he can be with her. All we know is, girl meets boy, now they want to live on an isolated island forever. It’s especially absurd considering Percy’s hamartia (fatal flaw) is freaking loyalty to those he loves. Needless to say, It’s a huge YIKES, especially when we apply it to Leo and Calypso.

It also raises the possibility that the romantic relationship between them is doomed to failure. And if you guys want to fight me on this, let’s look at Jason and Piper, a couple whose relationship started with a similar foundation. Piper had romantic memories implanted into her brain by Hera through the use of the Mist, while Jason was reduced to a Tabula Rasa (a blank slate for those who lack culture) by said goddess. They broke up before the Trials of Apollo because it was clear that when the dust settled, Piper had been aware that their romance was a lie and that their intentions to stay together was a mix of delusion and pressure from freaking Aphrodite. Leo and Calypso get together under what is arguably a very similar set of conditions if Ogygia’s magic had any influence on their relationship, and that this magic could wear off if given enough time.

Third, and here’s a pretty big one for me, would be Calypso’s character, mainly because there are a lot of unfortunate implications attached to it. In The Blood of Olympus, she was turned into the divine equivalent of Princess Peach, with Leo being her Mario (except he saves her with a badass metal dragon). Its extremely unnecessary to make a character, especially as one such as Calypso, get turned into the typical reward of a B-Class action movie. It’s insulting and puts her up as a trophy, a narrative that is definitely not ok by any means necessary.

In another direction, Calypso is also really, really worrying when things don’t go get her way. First, let’s look at The Odyssey, the first myth she pops up. Calypso had imprisoned Odysseus for ten years on her island until Hermes said to let him go, and although it gives them plenty of time to fall in love, it also raises the implications of stockholm syndrome. Then we’ve got the fact that Calypso cursed Annabeth out of spite, implicitly saying that she wished the daughter of Athena would suffer the same isolation that she did, which came to reality when Percy and Annabeth met the Arai in Tartarus. And Annabeth wasn’t even aware that she was still in Ogygia, much less intentionally intervened in the matter. When Percy left Ogygia, rather than be angry at Percy, Calypso cursed Annabeth out of all people to suffer the same loneliness and misery she went through. That’s some Hera at her worst levels of spite.

Through such evidence we can see that Calypso is extremely wrathful towards those who break her heart even though they don’t want to. It certainly implies that Calypso isn’t in a good state of mind, and could easily repeat said actions if provoked. We could almost compare it to Medea and the original Jason, but at least in that case, Medea has every right to be pissed off at Jason and take her revenge. Calypso’s curse and how she handles things certainly implies a level of immaturity that would end in disaster if they broke up.

One issue that, I’ll admit is more from my personal point of view is that the ship took a lot of Leo’s character and threw it in the garbage in Blood of Olympus. Though we see him do a lot of stuff behind the scenes, the fact that its all for the goal of reaching Calypso just reduced him to someone who is more focused on love than, you know, fighting the evil goddess that was responsible for killing his mom and getting sweet sweet revenge. While the revenge plot can be cliched sometimes, it can be played well, while romance and the typical ‘always save the girl’ trope is just overdone. If Leo had been allowed to, you know, be more focused on other things rather than Calypso, we could have seen a lot more variety in his character.

For example as one of the possible character arcs he could’ve gone through, Leo has always been alone among the couples, often being isolated. Heck, Nemesis herself stated that he would always be the seventh wheel, and that he would never find a place among his brethren. Though some fellow tumblr users have taken this in multiple ways, either saying that he should learn to be happy by himself or that he is socially isolated in the Argo II because of these romantic relationships (I prefer a mix of both). Uncle Rick just giving him a girlfriend seems like taking the easy way out of solving such an issue and abandoning what could’ve been a rather interesting character arc. The relationship isn’t a bad thing if we remove some of the unfortunate implications, but it is a bad way to end what is a complex and realistic problem for a character and in some cases maybe possible in real life.

One more minor but still yikes worthy point is that there’s a huge age gap between them. We’re not talking about the ‘Hazel is 15 and Frank is 17 and in one year that’ll be a problem because then Hazel will be jailbait’ age gap. And even then, we can argue that Hazel is older since she is chronologically ninety-one years old. No, Calypso is older by millennia in terms of mindset and body due to the perks of being a goddess, while Leo is sixteen.

God-to-Mortal relationships are already complicated, even with emotionally and socially well-functioning adults. The fact that Leo is underage, inexperienced with romance (despite his flirting, Calypso was his first kiss), and has been through a freaking ton of trauma in his youth, does not make this okay. At best, they’re both mutually interested in each other but may have different expectations when it comes to a relationship. At worst, Calypso is taking advantage of a boy just so she can get out of Ogygia and possibly dumping him later on like the wrapping of a candy bar. Even though Calypso lost her immortality during The Trials of Apollo, that doesn’t even compensate for the immense age gap alongside Leo’s guilt at the possibility that he might’ve been responsible for her losing said immortality.

Oh, and about Leo... I’m a fan of him, but I can admit that he is in a bad spot both mentally and emotionally throughout the series. He’s lost his mom due to a mix of his own powers and Gaea’s trickery, and never had the chance to fully process that event and come to terms with it. The foster home system alongside his own trauma has forced him to hide his emotions through a façade of happiness and jokes when it’s quite clear to me he needs a therapist, stat. He's also run away from several foster homes, implying this means he was and still is being affected by the event. His mask is still on during The Blood of Olympus considering he hid a lot of things from Piper and Jason.

Speaking about them, not helping this matter is the fact that he’s rather isolated in terms of friendships since Jason and Piper, his supposed best friends are more interested in locking lip rather than, you know, actually hanging out with each other. He doesn’t have good friendships with the rest of the Seven, and the closest ones he does have is with Hazel and Frank. And even then they start off in the wrong spot since Frank is very insecure about possibly losing Hazel to him during Mark of Athena while Hazel in the meantime, is also dealing with the fact that he is the descendant of her possible boyfriend Sammy Valdez.

This could indirectly have made him desperate for affection since he has nobody else to confide in during the rest of the series, which is a bad mental state to be in when one lands on Ogygia, the island that we’ve seen could possibly force two people to fall in love with each other. A romantic relationship is not something that he needs or something that will help him in the future. He needs more than that, and having him in one that could end in disaster is the last thing he needs.

And that does not make him a bad person, much less a bad character. While some who are similarly emotionally and socially isolated may turn to violence or creepy behavior on those they want affection from, Leo does not do that to the other characters. It just means that he as a character needs more time to recover and develop before we go giving him romantic relationships, much less one with Calypso.

That’s not to say that they don’t have some things in common. Both are starved for love and affection, with Calypso being constantly rejected by heroes while Leo was rejected by foster homes and his own family. It’s a trait that they have in common, but it shouldn’t be the only thing that they have in common, especially since it is laced with a trauma that is clear they haven’t had help processing. They need to develop more as characters and as friends before they should be paired together.

So… yeah. The Caleo relationship is, in my eyes, doomed to failure, or at least heavily flawed after taking the above points into account. Uncle Rick, as if seemingly aware of these criticisms, has put the relationship in a rocky place by The Tower of Nero, giving them the possibility of overcoming the above criticisms and their own flaws, or giving fanfic writers an out and pairing Leo with another character or have him single, but happy. Either way, in my opinion Caleo is a bad ship when it comes to how it was created, alongside the flaws and unfortunate implications it has.

While I can see some of the chemistry the ship has, you can’t just use a couple of moments where they get along as evidence that they belong together, especially with the above reasons. That’s like using a band-aid to cover a bullet hole without removing the bullet, stopping the bleeding, and preventing infection. If both characters and their relationship had been given more time to develop, I would understand how they would get together.

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leoandthecrew · 6 years

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Sometimes I Need You (Percy x Jason)

"Jason?", Percy's voice sounded behind him, "what's wrong buddy?".

Jason was sitting by the camp half-blood's lake. Moon threw silver lights that reflected on the water.

"I'm good", Jason tried to sound casual. He failed. He wasn't feeling good. He was feeling like he was lost in some foreign town. All Jason wanted to do right now was wander into the woods and never talk to anyone again, he never asked for Gods and monsters and erased memories, but, hey, apparently that's what he was getting.

"You don't look fine", Percy stated, sitting down on the sand next to Jason. "You look like Britney Spears before her public meltdown".

"Wow", Jason managed a smile, "was that supposed to be a compliment?".

"No", Percy confessed, "it was supposed to cheer you up".

"I don't think that will be enough", Jason admitted.

"I can see that", Percy laughed. "But seriously, what's wrong?", Percy stared at Jason, anticipation in his green eyes.

So many things were wrong. First, Jason wished he could remember his life. He wished he knew himself at least if he couldn't be sure about anything else. He didn't want to be a son of Zeus - it was a lonely journey. He wanted to talk to somebody about it, but he wasn't sure if anyone would understand. Not even Piper and Leo. They knew who they were, they had siblings here. Jason was alone.

"I know it's strange", Percy spoke quietly, but he managed to snap Jason out of his thoughts, "being thrown into all of this head-first, but you'll have to deal with all of it sooner or later".

"Yeah", Jason sounded bitter, "like I always do, like we all do".

He might've not remembered his life, but Jason knew one thing - being demi-god sucked. Sure, he could fly and control lightning, but he paid the much higher price. He was sure of it. If nothing else, he always needed to be a hero, face his monsters, solve his problems and survive.

"I promise I'll try to listen", Percy spoke again, letting Jason's comment slide.

Maybe Percy will understand. After all, they were pretty much the same. Except that Percy never had his memories taken away. But Percy was a son of Poseidon. Which was a situation similar to Jason's. Powerful God, not many children - both Percy and Jason were on their own in this camp in some way.

Jason sighed. "I just...I feel lost", he finally spoke, "gods, I sound like a teenage girl from some movie that tries too hard to be relatable". Jason tried to laugh on his own joke, but the smile quickly faded away.

"You don't even know who you are for sure", Percy nodded, "it makes you feel out of place, I get it".

"Yeah", Jason looked at him. Percy's green eyes were filled with worry and his lips were twirled in a kind of pained smile. "And being alone in that cold cabin doesn't make things easier".

Percy didn't speak for a while, he looked as he was debating something inside of his head. "Well, we can fix that", he stated finally.

"Fix what?", Jason raised an eyebrow in confusion.

"We can have a sleepover", Percy said sounding excited. "Great", he aggressively looked up at the sky, "now I sound like a bad teen movie". Jason laughed for what seemed to be the first time in too long. "What I wanted to say", Percy recollected himself, "I can sleep with you tonight, I mean, I'm also alone in my cabin so it's gonna be nice to have some snoring company for a change".

"I don't snore", Jason said, throwing a handful of sand at Percy.

"We'll see", Percy rolled away from him. He stood up and cleaned himself from the sand. "So", Percy looked at him in expectation, "you're coming or not".

Percy extended his hand to help Jason up. "Sure", Jason said, grabbing his hand and jolting up.

Zeus cabin was a simple building. White marble walls made it look more like an ancient Greek shrine than a camp house. The air was cold, it made Jason shiver every time he walked in.

"Why is there only one bed?", Percy asked, throwing himself on Jason's bed.

"I guess Zeus ain't aiming for that 'best father' award", Jason said, sitting down next to Percy.

"You're sleeping on the floor", Percy stated, shifting in the bed so he's sat next to Jason.

"No way", Jason protested.

"Then we sleep together?", Percy raised his eyebrow, a mischievous smile crossing his lips.

"I guess", Jason nodded. He took a moment to question his life choices. There he was, not knowing who he is or where he belongs, getting ready to sleep with a boy he knew for two weeks or something.

"What's wrong?", Percy noticed Jason's distant stare. He was gently tracing circles against Jason's shoulder. Where they touched, Jason felt a surge of energy, powerful like a sea storm.

"Thanks", Jason turned to face Percy, smiling gently at the black-haired boy.

Jason was waiting for an answer but Percy didn't say anything. Instead, Jason felt Percy's lips against his. He didn't even notice he was kissing him back. There it was again, a storm raging somewhere inside of Jason's body, rushing through his bloodstream and electrifying air between them. It was soft yet powerful.

Did Jason want this? He knew nothing about himself. Is he gay? Only for a moment, their lips parted. They were pressed together again in a matter of seconds, but at that moment, Jason figured something out.

The past didn't matter. It wasn't important who he was before, it didn't matter if he liked kissing boys. What mattered is who he was now. The catch is, he didn't have his present-self all figured out, but he knew one thing for sure - Percy felt right.

Jason pulled away from Percy, taking a moment to study his eyes in the dark. Percy was hot, he decided.

"Sorry", Percy whispered.

"Don't", Jason held up Percy's head with his hand. He locked their lips again.

The kiss was too short for Jason's liking. Percy pushed him away. "So", the black-haired boy spoke. It was too dark to see, but Jason imagined both of them blushing.

"Yeah", Jason said dumbly.

"You feeling better?", Percy asked, placing his hand over Jason's.

"Yeah", Jason whispered, "turns out all I needed was you".

"You just figured that out?", Percy joked.

"Yes, actually", Jason laughed. He wrapped his hands around Percy pulling him into a hug.

"I need you too", Percy whispered against his chest.

"I'm right here", Jason said brushing his fingers against Percy's neck.

#percy #percy jackson #percy jackon and the olympians #jason grace #jercy #fanfiction #one shot #fanfic #fluff #writing #heroes of olympus #rick riordan #gay

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densi-mber · 7 years

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I Don’t Want to be Your Fiancée

A Densi-mber Drabble

by Psyched

“C’mon, Kensalina, tell me!”

“The whining is not attractive, babe.”

“But I need to know! Wait…is it Vegas? Are we doing Las Vegas for New Year’s Eve? You know I’ve always wanted to. They close the entire Strip to car traffic and it’s like one giant block party. I hear the fireworks at midnight are phenomenal. Oh! Are we seeing Celine Dion’s show while we’re there?”

Kensi looked at her watch. “Considering it’s ten o’clock and Vegas is a four-hour drive, no Deeks, we are not going there for the new year.”

“But it’s only a little over an hour by plane. Less by private jet since you can skip security.”

“Damn,” Kensi said, hitting her forehead with the palm of her hand. “I completely forgot about the jet we keep hangered in our backyard.” She gave her fiancé a look of frustration. “No Vegas,” she reiterated as she picked up the remnants of their late take-out dinner and tossed them in the trash.

“So how are we going to spend the last two hours of 2017?” Deeks wiggled his eyebrows as he approached and pulled her into his arms. “The way we couldn’t spend the last two hours of 2016 because you weren’t feeling up to it?”

“You know, that’s not a bad idea,” Kensi kissed the corner of Deeks’ lips. “I’ll make you a deal. Whatever time is left over after we’ve done what I want to do, we can spend doing…whatever you want to do.”

Stepping away and rubbing his hands together in anticipation, Deeks said, “Okay then, let’s get to it. Oh wait, I forgot, I don’t know what it is!”

“Just make sure you have your phone and I’ll meet you on the couch.” She headed for the fridge. “Beer or wine?”

“We still having champagne at midnight?”

“I plan on having something more than the new year to celebrate by then, so yes.”

“Then wine, please.”

Kensi brought the wine, a bottle opener, and two glasses to the living room and handed the bottle and opener off to Deeks. She placed the glasses on the coffee table next to his phone, which she then picked up and started fiddling with.

“We going to play Angry Birds Friends? That’s so retro, Kens! And I can totally kick your ass in under an hour.”

She scoffed, “First, no you couldn’t. And second, no we’re not.”

“I think technically that should be ‘First, no we’re not and second, no I couldn’t.’ And I so could.”

Kensi rolled her eyes as she sat next to Deeks on the couch, tucking his phone under her leg. She held out the glasses while he poured the wine. Taking a glass from her, Deeks clinked Kensi’s and said, “To my beautiful fiancée. I can’t wait to spend the next year with you. 2018 will be awesome.” He leaned in and kissed her sweetly.

Kensi didn’t pull far away. “And on that note…I don’t want to be your fiancée any more. I want to be your wife. We’re setting a wedding date, for some time in 2018.”

Deeks felt Kensi press his phone into his chest. Taking it, he saw it was opened to their calendar app and his face fell. “That’s what we’re doing for the next two hours?”

“We were supposed to do it earlier this month, right after I got assurances from Whiting that she’ll let you leave LAPD without coming after you for murder. But then you distracted me.” She gave him a sly smile, “Not that I’m complaining.”

Deeks smirked proudly. “That was particularly fun, wasn’t it? Nothing like having my ladybird take things into her own hands to get my engine revving. Plus what you did with Whiting was good too,” he winked.

Kensi’s smile broadened to the one that was home to Deeks. “Then let’s set a date!” She withdrew a manila file folder from behind a couch pillow and flipped it open.

“Whoa, what’s that?”

“Important research.”

“Can’t be too important if it’s not in a binder and cross-referenced like the ones Crazy Bertie makes for you.”

“Correction: she makes those for us. And since your mother goes through all that trouble, the least you will do is look through them with me when the time comes. But that time is not now. And I think you’ll appreciate what I’ve done here to make choosing a date a little easier,” she waved the folder in front of him.

“Keep talking, I’m intrigued.”

“Okay, black out the following dates that we cannot get married.” Kensi waited until Deeks re-opened the calendar, “March twenty-second through April fifteenth, July twenty-fifth through August eighteenth, and November sixteenth through December sixth. Though if we’re not married by then, I’m not going to be very happy.”

Deeks’ fingers moved quickly across his phone screen. “…through December sixth.” He looked up at Kensi, disappointment clear in his eyes. “Why is April sixth out of the running?” He checked the app again, “It’s a Friday! I say we pick that.”

Kensi was touched by his suggestion that they get married on the anniversary of the day Jason and Tracy met. “We could,” she said slowly, “but I thought you might want to avoid those days.”

Deeks’ brows knitted together in confusion until his face lit up the moment he figured it out. “That’s when Mercury will be in retrograde next year!” Kensi nodded and showed him the collection of papers. “Are those our 2018 horoscopes?” Deeks noted she’d highlighted several sections in at least three different colors. “You don’t believe in astrology,” he said in a slightly awed voice.

“But you do. And I know you’d never want to get married while Mercury is in retrograde, so I looked some things up. And frankly, anything that will help narrow down the choice for a date is fine by me. That said, I do love the thought of getting married on April sixth.”

Deeks grimaced. “So did I. Hey, what about the following year? What’s Mercury doing the first week of April then?”

“No. Absolutely not. We are not waiting sixteen months to have a small wedding on the beach, Deeks. Let’s see if we can find another viable date before we have to choose between getting married in 2019 or while Mercury’s in retrograde.”

“2019 is sooner than leap day, at least,” he tried one last argument.

“Seriously, Deeks, do you even read these things? According to this, we’re practically doomed. A Leo woman and a Capricorn man shouldn’t even be in a relationship, much less get married. But it also says you’re reserved and like solitude while I’m social, gregarious, and like attention. I’m supposed to be full of life and you’re described as a pessimist. Would it really be so terrible to get married when a planet looks like it’s moving backwards?”

He shook his head, “Kensalina, I really love you for doing this for me. You’re right, we’ll find another day in 2018.” He slid a hand around her neck and pulled her in for a tender kiss that quickly grew passionate. Deeks wanted nothing more than to spend the rest of the year making love to Kensi, but he’d promised they’d pick a wedding date first. Time to get his head back in the game.

When they broke for air, he continued in his best professor tone, “Everyone knows horoscopes aren’t written in stone or meant to be taken literally when they seem to be ‘wrong.’ They’re merely supposed to help guide us. Of course we’re not doomed. We just have to work harder at our relationship sometimes. Remember early on, when we didn’t think we could even be good partners? We both made a conscious effort to change a little bit, and it made all the difference.” He took the pages from her and scanned them. “See, look right here, it also says you have temperamental tendencies and should refrain from that kind of approach and not be possessive in our marriage. Good advice, yeah?”

“Deeks, that’s good advice for anyone.”

“Ooh, problem solved, I think. Mine says, ‘Singles already in love relationship and eager to tie the knot need to plan for the auspicious day from around last week of February. The planet linked with love and intimate relationship, Venus remains in a state of combustion till twenty-first of February.’ Combustion, Kens, that sounds hot. Let’s get married then.”

“I saw that, too. ��But consider the timing with this from mine,” Kensi pointed to another highlighted section and read aloud, “’For love birds anxious to take their relationship to the next level, the period from around the last week of February seems supportive. Newlyweds or other couples inclined to have a child are in for a supportive planetary position on this count.’ And then nine months later, it says, ‘With a Venus retrograde adding flavor and intensity in October and November (in Scorpio to boot) you can expect early fall to see some dynamic, exciting and potentially life changing moments arriving.’ So I’m thinking we cross late February off the list of potential wedding dates, or we may end up pregnant before we planned.”

“Says the woman who doesn’t believe in this stuff,” Deeks muttered as he updated the calendar.

“Yeah, well. I’m not too big to admit that some of these things were pretty damned accurate. At least as far as describing the past. This is from mine again, ‘This entire period that has reached back as far as six years has slowly, and sometimes not so slowly, been reworking how you approach love, what you want from it, what you need from it on the very deepest levels. Fireworks without substance seldom last long as you move towards a more fulfilling, more complete attitude and awareness around intimacy.’”

“That’s right, no more fireworks without substance for my girl. I’m full of substance, and I know I make you see fireworks!”

“You’re such a doofus,” Kensi chuckled.

“Maybe, but I see you also printed out our career, horoscopes. Anything good there? Does it tell us what we’re going to do after LAPD and NCIS?”

Kensi rolled her eyes and perused the now familiar paragraphs, “Team work pays off well for you next year. But you could say that about every year since you started working with NCIS. And supposedly the end of the year will have possibilities for relocation or a change of course if you’re willing. Oh, and get this, ‘Your practicality and managerial skills would help you to climb yet another rung in the professional ladder.’”

“Hmm, practicality and managerial skills…maybe I need to be the next Hetty.”

“You’d be a damned sight better than Mosely, that’s for sure,” Kensi said earnestly.

“Thanks, sugar bear.” Deeks pressed a kiss to Kensi’s cheek. “What about yours?”

“Better suited to last year and I hope completely wrong for next year. My job is supposed to go through several ups and downs and I should plan my career future and work towards it but not mind the present-day hardships.”

“Solid advice, regardless. And so is this, ‘Reflective of a year-end bonus perhaps, or a new career offer, put anything that arrives to good use…and consider the future.’ Lines up with my potential end of year career change, yeah? That’s good to know.”

“Sure, except we we’ve been talking about that for a while now, Deeks. We’re not deciding to do it because our horoscopes say we should.”

“True, but maybe it will end up happening next year because the planets are in their proper alignment.”

“I don’t care why it happens, as long as it’s the right move for us, personally and professionally. And the first step in all of it is getting married. So let’s get back to picking the date. I don’t think anything else in our horoscopes is going to help with that, so let’s see what we’ve got.”

Deeks held up the calendar. They hadn’t eliminated that many options. Thinking aloud, Kensi said, “Okay, I really don’t want to wait until the end of the year to be married, so anything after the mid-November retrograde is no good. And before the first one is probably too soon, so let’s cross out everything before the March and April dates as well.”

“That leaves us with mid-April through most of July or end of August to mid-November,” Deeks summarized. “And I agree with you, the latter part of the year just seems too far away. Which leaves us with April, May, June, or July.”

“Weather’s hottest in June and July,” Kensi said.

“But the beach will be about fifteen degrees cooler,” Deeks pointed out

“And loaded with tourists,” she countered.

“I know all the best beaches that the tourists never find. Plus OSP closes for two weeks in early June, so we won’t have to take time off for a honeymoon. I can see it now, Kick-Ass Kensi Blye, a beautiful June bride.”

Kensi smiled, “So early June?”

“Yup. Friday, Saturday, or Sunday?” Deeks asked.

“Friday or Saturday, I think. The team might not have to go to work on Monday, but the Cupcake Girls will. Morning, afternoon, or evening?”

“Evening, definitely. Watch the sunset over the water while we say our vows? Doesn’t get any more magical than that.”

“Sounds perfect,” Kensi agreed, and their eyes locked for several seconds, the excitement at being so close to having a date almost palpable between them. “What does that leave us?”

Checking the calendar, Deeks said, “We’re officially off the clock starting Sunday June third and back on Monday June eighteenth. If we want to really take a long honeymoon we can shoot for the weekend before OSP closes, when we’d typically be off already.”

Kensi shook her head. “Unless something comes up, in which case the team wouldn’t be able to be there.”

“No bueno,” Deeks concurred. “So that leaves us with Friday June eighth or Saturday June ninth.”

“If we go with the eighth you’ll be more likely to remember our anniversary since it’s the same day of the month as your birthday,” Kensi said with a small smirk.

“Kens, no matter when we get married, I would never forget the date of the best day of my life.”

She was momentarily taken aback by the sincerity in Deeks’ tone. “God, I love you,” she whispered.

“But we probably should go with the eighth so you’ll be more likely to remember my birthday,” he teased.

“It was one year!” And just like that, the moment’s gone, Kensi thought.

“So are we done? Are Kensi and Deeks officially becoming Densi or Keeks on Friday, the eighth of June, 2018?”

“You want me to double-check some of the astrology sites to make sure they don’t say anything ominous about that date in particular?” she said.

Deeks got up and headed for the kitchen while Kensi worked her phone. “Great idea. Also, you should make sure it doesn’t fall on the same day as a major sporting event, or a holiday weekend, or the thirteenth…”

Kensi rolled her eyes but smiled at his last comment. Deeks had just returned when Kensi declared, “June eighth is clear on all fronts, babe. It’s comfortably ensconced between Memorial Day and Father’s Day; nearly two weeks between each and…our wedding.” She jumped and let out a small yelp when a loud pop sounded behind her. Turning with her hand on her chest, Kensi saw that Deeks had opened the bottle of champagne reserved for toasting the new year at midnight.

Glancing at her watch, Kensi said, “Deeks! There’s still more than an hour until midnight.”

“True, but we just set our wedding date, my sexy bride-to-be. And as you said before, that is something worth celebrating. Also, as per our earlier agreement, I get to choose how we spend any time remaining in 2017. And I can promise you we’ll be too busy to stop and pay attention to the turning over of the new year.”

#densi-mber 2017 #happy new year #also too long to be a drabble #sorry #not sorry

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anygoodisgood · 5 years

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“You’re not obligated to win. You’re obligated to keep trying. To the best you can do everyday.” – Jason Mraz

“If life were predictable it would cease to be life, and be without flavor.” – Eleanor Roosevelt “If you don’t design your own life plan, chances are you’ll fall into someone else’s plan. And guess what they have planned for you? Not much.” – Jim Rohn “The question isn’t who is going to let me; it’s who is going to stop me.” – Ayn Rand “The three great essentials to achieve anything worthwhile are, first, hard work; second, stick-to-itiveness; third, common sense.” – Thomas A. Edison

“Life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you’re going to get.” – Forrest Gump

“The successful warrior is the average man, with laser-like focus.” – Bruce Lee “A man is a success if he gets up in the morning and gets to bed at night, and in between he does what he wants to do.” – Bob Dylan “Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is a gift of God, which is why we call it the present.” – Bil Keane “Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.” – George Bernard Shaw “The whole secret of a successful life is to find out what is one’s destiny to do, and then do it.” – Henry Ford “Success? I don’t know what that word means. I’m happy. But success, that goes back to what in somebody’s eyes success means. For me, success is inner peace. That’s a good day for me.” – Denzel Washington “A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous.” – Ingrid Bergman “You miss 100 percent of the shots you never take.” – Wayne Gretzky “In order to write about life first you must live it.” – Ernest Hemingway

“Life itself is the most wonderful fairy tale.” – Hans Christian Andersen

“Do not go where the path may lead; go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson “We are what we repeatedly do; excellence, then, is not an act but a habit.” – Aristotle “Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.” – Oscar Wilde “The big lesson in life, baby, is never be scared of anyone or anything.” – Frank Sinatra “To love and be loved is to feel the sun from both sides.” – David Viscott

“If you aren’t going all the way, why go at all?” – Joe Namath

“Love is an irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired.” – Robert Frost “Those who believe in telekinetics, raise my hand.” – Kurt Vonnegut “I only regret that I have but one life to give for my country.” – Nathan Hale “The person who reads too much and uses his brain too little will fall into lazy habits of thinking.” – Albert Einstein “Better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all.” – St. Augustine

“Life would be tragic if it weren’t funny.” – Stephen Hawking

“Every child is an artist, the problem is staying an artist when you grow up.” – Pablo Picasso “Have no fear of perfection, you’ll never reach it.” – Salvador Dali “Life is not a problem to be solved, but a reality to be experienced.” – Søren Kierkegaard “Curiosity about life in all of its aspects, I think, is still the secret of great creative people.” – Leo Burnett “Imagination is the beginning of creation. You imagine what you desire, you will what you imagine, and at last, you create what you will.” – George Bernard Shaw

“Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.” – Oscar Wilde

“The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.” – Lao Tzu “Imagination was given to man to compensate him for what he is not, and a sense of humor was provided to console him for what he is.” – Oscar Wilde “What you do speaks so loudly that I cannot hear what you say.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson “Spread love everywhere you go: first of all in your own house. Give love to your children, to your wife or husband, to a next door neighbor. Let no one ever come to you without leaving better and happier. Be the living expression of God’s kindness; kindness in your face, kindness in your eyes, kindness in your smile, kindness in your warm greeting.” – Mother Theresa

“Be happy for this moment. This moment is your life.” – Omar Khayyam

“You must be the change you wish to see in the world.” – Gandhi “Strive not to be a success, but rather to be of value.” – Albert Einstein “Keep your face to the sunshine and you can never see the shadow.” – Helen Keller “The best way out is always through.” – Robern Frost “The dream crossed twilight between birth and dying.” – T. S. Eliot

“People are just as happy as they make up their minds to be.” – Abraham Lincoln

“Don’t think. Thinking is the enemy of creativity. It’s self-conscious, and anything self-conscious is lousy. You can’t try to do things. You simply must do things.” – Ray Bradbury “Creativity is just connecting things. When you ask creative people how they did something, they feel a little guilty because they didn’t really do it, the just saw something. It seemed obvious to them after a while.” – Steve Jobs

“Sing like no one’s listening, love like you’ve never been hurt, dance like nobody’s watching, and live like it’s heaven on earth.” – Mark Twain

“The power of imagination makes us infinite.” – John Muir “Doing the best at this moment puts you in the best place for the next moment.” – Oprah Winfrey “Originality is nothing but judicious imitation.” – Voltaire “Life is made of ever so many partings welded together.” – Charles Dickens

“Love is like the wind, you can’t see it, but you can feel it.” – Nicholas Sparks

We hope our list of famous quotes took you out of your funk! Feel free to share your favorite with your friends or in the comments below.

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— Hannah Hutyra