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fadebolt · 9 months ago

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This blog is many months old by this point, and it seems like I'm slowly but surely being noticed by more and more people, sooooo I'm thinking a pinned post might be in order.

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~ Hello! Hi! Sup!

Welcome to my lil space!

Name's FadeBolt, but feel free to call me Fade. (Yes, that is the name of a DotA ability. No, I did have more creative name ideas, I just did stuff under this one, so I'm sticking with it)

~ I'm an anxious 21 year old Hungarian wreck that is currently doing college in the northern parts of this small hellhole in the middle of nowhere that we call Serbia.

~ I like to gush and ramble about media. I like to interact with media. I like to make stuff about media. I like to look at, and take part in stuff that other people make about media.

~ Most of this blog is about my hyperfixation that has lasted for almost two entire years by this point, which is, you guessed it - Rain World.

~ Obviously, I still like other stuff (most notably Warcraft 3, as well as League of Legends and its wonderful lore/universe), and I might make posts about them on some occasions, but they're not my main interests, and considering how much I've entrenched myself in the RW community, that likely won't change anytime soon.

~ I don't really have a central thing that I intended for this blog. It's just simply - if I get ideas and I like them enough, then I'll do them. And if I stumble into something that really peaked my interest, or if I feel like I could add something onto it, then I'm reblogging it. (Though I do have a bit of an anxiety over that, cus whenever I reblog something, I always feel bad for the stuff I didn't reblog, but I can't just keep reblogging everything all day every day, so I often end up not reblogging good stuff. Help me. Please xd)

~ But the main things that you can expect here are long writings about my opinions, (mostly) fun drawing, voiceovers, and occasional ramblings about stuff.

~ I want this to be abundantly clear - I really value constructive criticism, no matter how unsolicited it might be. So if I said something you don't agree with, made a mistake somewhere, or just have some general issues with my stuff, don't be afraid to point them out. (Just make sure that it is actually constructive. The goal here is to improve, but there's not really much I could take away from something like "Your art sucks" or "Your opinions are stupid", is there?)

~ Due to recent, uhm... let's just call them 'events', I want to note that online discussions around politics and stuff related to that makes me extremely stressed and uncomfortable, especially after seeing what Tumblr can do to people who said stuff most folks didn't like.

~ This doesn't mean I'm making a strict 'no politics' rule or anything, I'm just looking to minimalize that stuff, and preferably keep it in private 1 on 1 conversations where I won't feel like I'm being judged by hordes of onlookers. This applies to any other contentious topic, too.

~ Unlike a lot of folks, I will not be having a DNI list. I know that this sounds a bit weird, but I want this space to be nice and happy and welcoming, and I do believe that media should be used as a way to unite us in spite of our differences (so this idea of saying "If you have these political opinions I don't like, then GTFO!" just doesn't sit right with me, though I completely understand why some people do that).

I also believe that instead of locking out and trashing on people who said and did stuff we didn't like, we should instead try and help make them understand why that stuff is wrong, so they can learn and grow, because people can indeed change for the better, especially with how many young folks are roaming around on this website. I won't force any of you to hold yourselves to these ideals, but I will stay true to them myself.

~ With that being said: I am not tolerating problematic stuff or asshole behavior here. I'll be somewhat lenient on this, but "I want this space to be nice and happy and welcoming" will always take priority over avoiding being judgemental of others. Just please don't bother me with stuff that's obviously messed up, don't be a cunt, and don't send NSFW my way, that's all I'm asking.

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Aaaaaaaaand I think that's about all the important info for now. I might update this in the future, if need be.

Anyways, I'd like to quickly thank everyone who's ever supported me, taken part in positive interactions with me, or have even just quietly appreciated at least one little thing I have made/done at some point!

I was super scared that nobody's going to care even a little bit about anything I'll do, but I'm very thankful to have gotten proven wrong again and again and again by this wonderful community!

Have a wonderful day and night, everyone! Cheers! :D

#pin #fade rambles

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imuybemovoko · 2 years ago

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so I made a language by putting proto-indo-european in a blender and leaving it on the liquefy setting for an afternoon

Yeah.

Today I'll be describing my hypothetical Indo-European conlang Bèhsráto. It's an isolate within the family, but there's considerable influence from Slavic languages, Latin, Greek, and a bit from Albanian and Hungarian, mostly in the form of loaned vocabulary.

PHONOLOGY

I made a lot of interesting decisions here.

Breathiness in vowels spreads forward in a word except when there's a consonant cluster, then it's blocked. ɴ arose from breathy vowels via rhinoglottophilia, i.e. V̤ > Ṽ > ɴ, in stressed syllables and at the end of words.

Consonant clusters can get a little crunchy, though at the beginning of words they're fairly limited to s or ʃ followed by a voiceless stop, z followed by a voiced stop, an obstruent and then a sonorant, a cluster of a stop and then a fricative of the same voicing, or just about any sequence of /x/ and then another consonant. For one example of a crunchier consonant cluster, the name of the language is pronounced [bɛ̤xsrɐtɔ]. Stress is ...weird, but typically on the penult (as here) or the antepenult.

Bèhsráto is a satem language, meaning the Proto-Indo-European palatal stops shifted to fricatives and affricates and the labiovelar *kʷ *gʷ *gʷʰ merged with k g gʰ. The word for hundred is státo [stɐto]. (For a while, the postalveolar affricates the palatal stop series yielded surfaced as retroflex sounds, and some very strange things happened to some of them, yielding these st- or zd- clusters.)

Another fun note: Bèhsráto retains the laryngeals from Proto-Indo-European as /x/ in some environments. This is where a lot of those weird initial clusters involving /x/ come from. *h₃mígʰleh₂ surfaces as hmáglej [xmɐglɛj] "fog", *h₃rḗǵs as hris [xris] "king", *h₂ékʷeh₂ as hakoj [xakɔj] "drinking water", and so on.

ORTHOGRAPHY

I decided to write this language with the latin script like a basic bitch. I'm kind of assuming it's spoken on the coast of the Black Sea, but I didn't put a ton of effort into the history, I was more interested in bullying the phonology and grammar until they took a new, strange form. I could justify using Cyrillic or Greek alphabet for this but I didn't want to think about it, so I simply didn't.

GRAMMAR

This is where I did some of my weirder things.

Bèhsráto is a topic-prominent language. It retains a nominative, accusative, genitive, and dative case in pronouns, but in most nouns there is only the direct (serving the roles of both nominative and accusative) and the indirect (a catch-all for all others, most often clarified via prepositions). Word order is topic-initial.

Here's the personal pronouns:

In ...most... of these, four cases remain distinct. The genitive serves double purpose as an ablative, and the dative is also a locative and instrumental.

The topic marker agrees in animacy, number, and case with the marked noun:

The topic marker developed from a historical definite article. The historical indefinite article developed into a sort of indirect particle that can apply to the indirect object for emphasis when it isn't the topic, singular form ojno, plural ojna.

Also here's the case endings:

Direct case means it's either the subject or the object; indirect case means it's anything else. The direct case is a -j suffix when the noun ends in o, else it shifts any final vowel to o or is a suffix. Adjectives agree to the noun in case and number, i.e. șrego "darkness" en șregoj in darkness-IND "in darkness" en țonákoj șregoj in hellish-IND darkness-IND "in hellish darkness" (these examples are very My Immortal, I know, don't @ me)

The verb agrees to the topic of the sentence and so has direct and inverse endings to mark which is the agent and which is the patient. More on that later. For now let me crack out a few example sentences to explain just what is going on here:

Sa testu teset legâsna TOP.DIR carpenter make-PST.3S.DIR bed "The carpenter made a bed"

Tod legâsna testor testu TOP.DIR bed make-PST.3S.INV carpenter "It was a bed that the carpenter made"

Basically, since word order is determined by the topic and not by who's doing what, the verb has different endings to determine which noun serves which role.

Now let's do something with an indirect object:

Sa hmoj dâgantèr zgome esto per ojno dzero TOP.DIR 1S.GEN daughter ride-3S.IPFV.DIR horse through IND gate-IND "My daughter is riding a horse through the gate"

The particle "ojno" here adds a degree of specificity and secondary emphasis to the noun it's marking; this is an example of the way the indirect case operates, where it's part of the constructions that use prepositions.

Now let's mark this gate as the topic:

Per tod dzero hmoj dâgantèr zgome esto. through TOP.DIR gate-IND 1S.GEN daughter ride-3S.IPFV.DIR horse "Through the gate is where my daughter is riding a horse"

In this case, the indirect object is fronted and the old SVO default word order is returned.

Now let's get into some of the uses of the indirect case.

The possessive construction uses the preposition hapo "off, away" and places the possessor noun in the indirect case, i.e. hneumo hapo táranoj "the name of the tyrant".

Other constructions that deal in origin use the preposition haz "from", i.e. záuro haz poloj "the man from the city"

There's a benefactive-type construction using the preposition pro "leading to", i.e. dèștâ pro Aținoj "altar for Athena"

There's a locative construction using en "in", i.e. en Ațínoj "in Athens" (btw that's not a typo, the name of the city and the name of the goddess are a minimal pair of /ɨ/ and /i/)

There are two instrumental-type constructions, one for a living thing and one for a tool: jágo estoj "with a horse"; zájzdo nehábâ "with boats". (It took me this long to use literally any plural? shame.)

So that's basically nouns.

VERBS

I'm going to drop tables for the direct endings and the inverse endings, and then things get weird. Basically these are suffixes, but they'll tend to replace the last vowel of the root. Not always, but often.

Direct endings:

"Subjunctive 1" refers to the fact that I have two things I couldn't come up with a better label for than "Subjunctive" and the number just differentiates between them. Subjunctive 1 is a bit softer, deals in hopes, preferences, etc, in a way that's adjacent but distinct from the optative, and subjunctive 2 is needs, ought statements, etc.

"Direct" here means that the topic is also the subject, or that the topic is the indirect object and the order of subject, object, and verb is the default SVO.

Inverse endings:

"Inverse" here means the topic is the object. The personal agreement is still based on the subject of the sentence, but this means it's not the topic.

Now, there are several tenses that affix after these endings:

Example: Ṣediștâ eat-3S.DIR-SUBJ2 "He needs to eat" (Note here that the t in the 3S.DIR ending, normally -ti-, is lost here because of the voiced stop.)

These five suffixes are actually derived from converbs, which function in a rather similar way.

CONVERBS

Here's each converb suffix and its main meaning:

These can have broader meanings than the above; I just listed the basic ones to save a bit of space here. Going into what each of these does would be annoying as hell for the purposes of a post like this. Anyway, let's crack out an example sentence or two:

Ṣedáneutá hmá, taj haște ze stejgìr ha ojno bèjzdo. eat-3P.DIR-CONV.instead 1S.ACC TOP.P bear-P REFL.IND climb-3P.IPFV.DIR on IND.S hill-IND "Instead of eating me, the bears are climbing on a hill."

(I use the reflexive and a locative construction here because the verb stejgè "climb, march" doesn't take an object, and specifically the indirect reflexive because they're using their body to do an action and not really doing it to themselves.)

Zorozmautá, zdo tetol hmoj zdensèrè ne henáko. stir-1S-CONV.NEG.SUBJ 1S.NOM hold.up-1S.DIR.PST 1S.GEN hand-P NEG breathe-1S.DIR-and "Needing not to move, I held up my hands and didn't breathe"

(When they are subject, pronouns are by default the topic and need not be marked if in topic position. Also, the suffix -ko is "and" or "any", and the suffix -zi means "or", and these can apply to nouns, verbs, and adjectives. Also, particle ne is one of the negation pathways. There are three, more on that later.)

AUXILIARY VERBS

There are two auxiliary verbs, bỳh "to become" for the future tense and hajs "to have, to obtain" for the past perfect tense. The auxiliary verbs take the endings and the main verb is in participle form. An example of each:

Zdo bỳhoz hládòt h'Afroditeu en Sofijo 1S FUT.1S.DIR.PERF arrive-PTCP.DIR on Friday in Sofia-INDIR "I will arrive in Sofia on Friday"

(Here the preposition ha "on" is cliticized. That happens with initial vowels. Also, weekdays are derived from the names of Greek gods. Aphrodite gets Friday. A note that's not super relevant to this example but seems useful to include: Saturday, Kroníu, can also be Síbota, or "sabbath", and which is used varies some by region but Síbota is universally far more popular among devout followers of Abrahamic religions.)

Sa Aleksada hajsti zejdot sjo zásto. TOP.DIR Alexander have-3S.DIR find-PTCP 3S.GEN dog "Alexander has found his dog."

NEGATION

There are three forms of negation. The general one is the particle ne. It negates verbs, serves as an answer, etc.

Another, now primarily a derivational form, is the prefix o(n)-, meaning "without", "not", etc. Example: zásteto "holy", ozásteto "unholy"

The third is the command form, the particle ma. Example:

Ma se zejdâ! NEG.IMP REFL tremble-2S.IMP.DIR lit. "Do not tremble", basically "B̴̻̐͑̚Ȇ̵̱͔͘͜ ̵̳͂Ṉ̷̙͑͘O̶͎̫̮̾T̴̪̺̉̈́ ̷̬͕̬̔Ã̷̛̜͒Ḟ̸̳̺̯R̶̝̒̈Ȃ̵͉͓̎̒I̷̠͚͊̓D̴̡͛̇͘͜" as a biblical angel might say. bèjà is a general term for "to fear, to be afraid"; se zejb- is a way of saying the same thing that is intense and often has religious connotations.

INTERROGATIVES

it question tiemn binch

That's right, we have quite a stack of question words. Several that take more than one word in English, and singular and plural forms. The question word is generally going to be the first thing in the sentence.

kí/ko here is a term that shows up in questions that aren't covered by these others or can function as "What?" as in asking for clarification, repetition, etc.

A couple of examples:

Kosmud gomosi? where.from come-2S.DIR "From where have you come?"

Ska sa proruka șesti? who TOP.DIR prophet be-3S.DIR

RELATIVE CLAUSES

Relative clauses use the relative pronoun, singular jo plural je, and sometimes an appropriate interrogative. I'll give just one example because anything is able to be relativized.

Example:

Taj goneje je zejd hmoj hagno hajsir zesezo halbè zeste TOP.DIR woman-P.DIR REL.P find-PST.3P.DIR have-IPFV.DIR.3P wear-PTCP.IPFV white-P clothes-P "The women who found my lamb were wearing white clothes"

It's technically also correct to render this as Taj goneje je kítaj zejd hmoj hagno but it's not mandatory.

REFLEXIVES

There are two reflexive, a direct and an indirect one, se and ze respectively.

Let's bring back the times I used these and talk about the reflexives specifically a little bit more.

Ma se zejdâ! NEG.IMP REFL tremble-2S.IMP.DIR "Be not afraid!"

Se is used for an action done directly and consciously to oneself; in this case, since when angels issue this as a command it implies agency over one's own fear, it qualifies.

Ze carries less intentionality in contexts like the above, but is also an indirect form. The action is, in this case, technically without object, so you use the indirect reflexive.

And that basically sums this thing up. Here's a translation I had a lot of fun with.

Cave Johnson's announcement about mantis men

Ysmá je benhpreste pro taj DNAje hapo bugolmoka inikermedà zej, zdo taj zese zerde trejsteko dàr. DAT.2P REL.P volunteer-2P.PST.DIR towards TOP.P DNA.P off mantis inject-1P.SUBJ.INV 1P | 1S TOP.P excellent.P word-P sad.P-and give-1S.INV To you who volunteered so that we would inject you with the DNA from a praying mantis, I give happy words and sad ones.

Trejstá, taj teste prolatomosdàștâ hed telo hapo tímpo. sad TOP.DIR.P test-P delay-1P.INV-SUBJ2 until end off time.IND Sadly, we must delay those tests until the end of time.

Zesá, sa nezo test hajsmosdà ysmá: Jy bỳhțe keutásnezo serkáty zdánáto bugolmoke-záure. excellent TOP.DIR new test have-1P.INV 2P.DAT | 2P become-2P.DIR.IPFV fight-DIR.IPFV.PTCP army made.of mantis-P man-P Happily, we have a new test for you: You will be fighting an army made of mantis men.

Gàbàdâ pușka; sa zdèlò șejter seksadâ. take-2S.IMP rifle | TOP.DIR yellow path follow-IMP.INV.2S Take a rifle; follow the yellow line.

Ty bỳhsi zojdot jo kídeh sa test kene. 2S become-2S.DIR know-PTCP.DIR REL when TOP.DIR test begin-3S.IPFV.DIR You will know when the test is starting.

#conlang #i stabbed proto indo european right in the left kidney and this is the result #"B̴̻̐͑̚Ȇ̵̱͔͘͜ ̵̳͂Ṉ̷̙͑͘O̶͎̫̮̾T̴̪̺̉̈́ ̷̬͕̬̔Ã̷̛̜͒Ḟ̸̳̺̯R̶̝̒̈Ȃ̵͉͓̎̒I̷̠͚͊̓D̴̡͛̇͘͜#cave johnson

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holofoiltowercard · 1 year ago

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The Journey of The Tarot Haiku

XI: Justice - Laws

Today's post will be about the legal aspects of Kindle Direct Publishing, or what I did in the course of signing up and self-publishing my book.

First, I printed out the entire user agreement, which was like seven pages in teeny tiny font. It didn't tell me about every single thing that I needed to know to publish, but it did allow me to ascertain the following:

how massive Amazon's influnce is over the content, which is where Kindle Create becomes crucial in order for your manuscript to look the way you want it to (I imagine that otherwise submitting something less formatted will undergo formatting for ebook or print that could possibly make the manuscript fall to pieces);

how public domain works are not eligible for Kindle Select, and Tarot was indeed considered public domain, so I could ignore those parts entirely now.

The rest I was fairly familiar with from work experience, so I could proceed to link a bank account and figure out taxation - which was thankfully easier than I first thought it might be, I answered the questions and it figured out the rest, so to speak.

Pretty much everything else on the rules of how to publish I got from KDP's different guidelines and from searching for other people's articles to cross-check what I was doing. The copyright came from following formats that aligned with what I was aiming for, for instance.

I think that's it for the genuinely legal side of it, because I didn't go for a pen name on account of it sounding rather difficult, and not knowing what I ought to do about copyrighting it. Everything of this sort is often written with Americans in mind, and I'm Hungarian, so I kept asking myself, does this apply to me? Is that how I should be doing this despite being based in a different country? And in the end I dropped it. There is a wealth of articles on the subject, but few are straightforwardly helpful, so be prepared to read a lot of filler.

As for the rest... be prepared for the laws of capitalism to have Instagram in their clutches. 99% of my interactions there so far have been with people desperate to promote or review my book for a fee. I did pay for a bit of advertising on there, but I would not call it a pleasant experience: I'm sure they are rendering a service that has the potential to be helpful, and I hope to everything that it will, but it is very clear that everyone on Instagram is marketing themselves very desperately, and when you say you cannot afford to pay them, which is completely true, I'm not a multi-millionaire turning starving orphans from my door but a single person who is losing their job to funds drying up everywhere, people can get bitter. And all I can do is sit there and empathize. It is terrible that nowadays we feel forced or compelled in some other way to monetize everything about us, including our hobbies or passions. When I turned down a reviewer, he typed, "okay bye flop author" in response, then deleted it in a hurry, and first I laughed, but then I sat there thoughtful and sad, not because it was an insult that could hurt me, but because it genuinely felt frustrated and bitter, and I wished for better things for both of us. I was not prepared to find this much hunger and desperation on Instagram, but it is out there. I wonder if anyone talks about it much amid all the glitter and glamor everyone is trying to project, and which itself is becoming sort of terrifying to me. The more I look at Instagram videos, the less I want to ever make videos. I guess you could say it's sort of a lawless land of shilling, and I can't even blame those who are genuinely desperate. I'm one of them after all.

If you love Tarot, consider checking out my book or telling others it exists. It would be lovely to talk to people who love Tarot.

Buy the ebook

Buy the paperback

Buy the hardcover

#tarot #tarot cards #justice #poetry #haiku #the tarot haiku journey

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fixaidea · 4 years ago

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Did I ever tell you about the convoluted etymology of the Hungarian translation of the species-name of Tolkien’s elves?

So. Here goes:

Hungarian folklore has fairies. They are more often than not human sized and while they aren’t so wildly different from Celtic fae creatures, it’s just enough that I wouldn’t muddy waters by calling them elves. They are fairies. The word for them is ‘tündér’.

Now in 1830 Vörösmarty Mihály writes a drama called ‘Csongor és Tünde’, which is about a mortal man and a fairy falling in love. Now, the name of the fairy lady is Tünde, which, as you can guess, is just a slightly tweaked version of the word ‘tündér’, as in fairy.

Now we come to Tolkien!

In 1975 The Hobbit is translated by Szobotka Tibor. He uses the word ‘tündér’, so literally just ‘fairy’ and rolls with it. It’s changed in a later translation to match The Lord of the Rings.

Speaking of:

The Lord of the Rings was publised in Hungarian in 1981. The translation was started by Réz Ádám (chapters 1-11) and finished by Göncz Árád, so I’m not sure who to credit with the decision, but one on them thought that nope, fairies and Tolkien’s elves are obviously too different to be called by the same name.

And so he went, took the personal name of Vörösmarty’s heroine (already a play on ‘fairy’) and turned it into a species name. And so, Tolkien’s elves receive their proper species name: tünde.

#tolkien #elves #translation #middle earth #the lord of the rings #lotr #the hobbit #(Hungarian naming order applies)

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littlemissnoname13 · 3 years ago

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Fortunate Misfortune (D.M x Reader)| Chapter 4: “The Usual”

Summary: Its his last year at Hogwarts and former Hogwarts bully, Draco Malfoy just wants to clean up his act and get through the year. Maybe even apply for a potions fellowship and date Astoria Greengrass. His plan seems perfect on paper except for a minor hiccup in the form of a feisty Hufflepuff girl...

A/n: This multi-chapter has been in my Drafts since before I started posting on here and I’ve used so many scenes from it and turned them into one shots in the past. The series is almost completed and ill just be dumping it on my blog. Please do not feel pressured to read it. 😅🥲.

Reblogs and Feedbacks are always welcomed. :)

Warnings: none except coarse language and mentions of food (No voldy AU)

Words: 1500 give or take

Chapter 3 | Masterlist| Chapter 5

“The usual please. And an ice cream sundae.” Draco asked, struggling to catch his breath when he finally reached Four Broomsticks.

You are already there of course, chin resting on the table of your usual booth, repeatedly stabbing what used to be a poor breadstick with your fork.

“Well, well, if it isn’t Malfoy.”

“Y/n.” He said your name like it was an apology in itself even though he was perfectly aware that he’d have to do more than just say your name to be forgiven.

By looking at the near empty and clean table, he knew you hadn’t eaten anything, not even the breadsticks.

If that wasn’t enough, the look on your face reminded him of that first night in your room—aka the angry Hungarian Horntail glare ready to fry him to a crisp.

You were the most terrifying girl he’d ever had the pleasure of meeting.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” You asked, making him instantly snap out of his trance.

“Look, y/n. I’m really sorry I forgo—”

“Don’t, Draco.” You dropped your fork and lifted your left hand to stop him. “Save it for another day.”

He wanted to ask you what you meant by that. He just wanted to apologise and get it over with. The concept of saving it seemed like too much of a liability.

What else was he capable of doing that would warrant an apology? You were right not to trust him after he stood you up like that.

This wasn’t a Date though. Right?. He was over thinking it.

Just when he thought he’d ask for more clarifications, the usual along with an ice cream sundae was served at the table.

“I thought you didn’t like the usual.” You commented while he sat down next to you instead of taking his normal seat opposite to you.

“I’ve grown quite fond of it, actually.”

“Why? Because I told you Astoria likes it?”

“No.” He said, tilting sideways so he could get a better look at you. “I ordered it Because you like it. I’ve been coerced into eating it every time we come here.”

“Fine, all for me. None for you.” You teased, dragging the plate to your side of the table. “Also, why the ice cream?”

“I thought ice cream would pair well with it.” He shrugged, plucking the maraschino cherry from the ice cream and popping it in his mouth.

“Are you bribing me with food to make up for your tardiness?” You raised an accusatory eyebrow at him.

“No.” He shook his head before pushing the dish filled with ice cream your way. “Consider this my way of making it up to you.”

~~~

At around one in the morning, the two of you decided to walk back to Hogwarts—pushing each other and kicking stray rocks along the way.

You made it a point to ask him about his encounter with Astoria but never got around to doing it because the two of you were somehow wrapped up in discussing about life after Hogwarts.

He told you all about the fellowship and his want to move away from the Malfoy name. It sounded like he wanted nothing to do with it.

You’d never thought you’d hear him say things like that, let alone smile wishfully while talking about moving away if given the opportunity to.

When you finally reached your common room entrance, Draco pulled you into an embrace like it was the new norm.

~~~

Sleeping proved more difficult than you’d anticipated.

Every time you switched positions or tossed and turned, you could smell the faint scent of Draco’s cologne that had somehow caught onto your skin.

Each time the fragrance was released into the air around you, you found yourself thinking of him and it was stupid because you loved Blaise.

When the clock hit four, you grabbed your sketchbook and walked towards the school courtyard. Sketching seemed more productive than tossing and turning like a fish out of water anyway.

“What are you doing here at this ungodly hour of the morning!?” He asked, running towards you at the school courtyard, looking like he’d barely slept a wink. “Even the birds weren’t up at this time.”

Trying to get rid of my thoughts of you. Ugh.

“Nothing too interesting.” You said very curtly as you quickly shut your sketchbook. You’d initially gone down there to sketch the night sky, but somehow by the end of the night, you were shading light shadows on his blonde hair that you’d captured perfectly on paper.

You weren’t planning on drawing Draco. Far from it actually. But, his stupid face was rather interesting to draw.

His stone cold grey eyes full of unusual depth, his rather angular jaw and his kissable lips—especially he’d licked ice cream from the corner.

What? No….No. No.

“Y/n?”

“Hmm?” You muttered absently, still wondering why you were suddenly so intrigued by wondering how his lips would feel on yours.

“You’re cold.” He pointed out, plopping himself next to you and running his hands along the goosebumps on your arms in an attempt to warm you up.

As if that was going to help. His touch was only sending more chills down your spine.

When Draco took notice that you weren’t getting any warmer, he raised his arms and slid off his Slytherin sweater—revealing his ridiculously toned lower abdomen in the process.

“Arms up.” He instructed and you looked at him like he was bonkers.

“Draco I don’t need your—”

“I said, arms up y/n.” He said firmly. “Don’t make me ask again.”

When he said it like that, you found yourself instantly obeying. Maybe it was the tone of his voice or the hard expressions on his face but you were suddenly raising your arms.

Draco quietly slipped his sweater onto you, messing your hair up in the process.

The hard expressions disappeared when he chuckled to himself, noticing the mess he’d created of your hair.

He then used his fingertips to gently smooth out the hairs that were raised on your head due to the sweater static.

“What is it with you and my hair.” You mumbled, tying to sound annoyed. You weren’t even aware of just how close your faces were until you noticed the way he licked his lips.

It was surely the warmth of his sweater but, suddenly you felt hot.

The chilliness of the night was suddenly replaced by nothing but heat.

Heat underneath your cheeks, heat flowing through your veins, heat fluttering on your lower abdomen.

“That.. ought to do it.” He whispered, finally tucking a strand of hair behind your ears as a finishing touch.

Instead of retrieving his hand and pulling away, His face drew in closer and closer.

You surprised yourself by parting your lips and leaning in.

He eyes were fixed on yours and they looked so intense that you had to shut yours.

Just when you were about to close the gap between your lips, the birds started to chirp indicating the break of day and breaking the spell of weird tension between the two of you.

“It’s morning.” You whispered, backing away while Draco rubbed the back of his neck, before looking up at the colour changing sky.

“So it is.” He mumbled.

You only nodded and looked up at the sky too.

Everything felt peaceful and serene for once.

He nonchalantly wrapped a lazy arm around your shoulders and you rested your head on his.

“Everything feels...easier with you.” He mumbled quietly. “It doesn’t feel that way with anyone else.”

“I know.” You whispered.

~~~

Draco left shortly after people started to wake up because Merlin only knows what the rumor mill would do if they caught the two of you watching the sun come up together.

It was a Saturday and since he was done with all his school work, Draco decided to take Blaise up on his offer for an early morning match of friendly quidditch with the Ravenclaws.

It seemed like a good opportunity to ask Blaise about you and the sooner he set you up with Blaise, the better.

Draco would make sure to be super discreet of course.

He certainly didn't need another howler from his furious Hungarian Horntail.

His? Did he just call you his? Get your head out of your arse Draco.

Draco quickly shook off the feeling as he got dressed in his quidditch robe. Deep down he knew that finding the snitch would be a nightmare in his present mindset and he thanked the gods because it was just a friendly weekend match.

Throughout the match, Draco tried to stay focused but all the while, he found himself thinking about what would actually happen if Blaise did in fact, return your feelings.

You’d probably go back to being a stranger after you got what you wanted.

He wanted things to work out with Blaise, didn’t he?

If so, why was the thought of someone else potentially giving you their sweater and getting to spend their nights with you at four broomsticks while eating “the regular” bothering him?

What was this feeling that was making his grip on his broom sweaty and weak?

“Oi, Malfoy, watch out!” Flint called out and Draco suddenly snapped out of his foggy thoughts, narrowly missing a bludger.

He would have rather gotten hit by a bludger than admit what he knew he was feeling.

Jealousy.

~~~

Series tag list 🏷: @sycathorn-slush @louweasleymalfoy @writeandtranslate @silentkiller2374 @lilmissquackson @badass-yn

#draco malfoy x reader #draco malfoy #draco x reader #draco malfoy imagine #draco fanfiction #draco x hufflepuff!reader #draco malfoy fanfic #draco fic #draco malfoy series #draco x reader fluff #draco fluff #draco lucius malfoy #draco malfoy fic

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church-history · 3 years ago

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Crucial Victory Over the Hordes of Islam - The Battle of Vienna - Sep 12th 1683

In 1683, the forces of the Holy League, under Poland’s King Jan Sobieski, roundly defeated the Mohammedan invaders at the Battle of Vienna. Here is a brief telling of that triumphant occasion by Gary Potter (in “Saint Mary of Victory – The Historical Role of Our Lady in the Armed Defense of the Faith”):

Fortuitously, the pope of the day, Innocent XI, had just brokered an alliance between the Holy Roman Empire and the Kingdom of Poland, which was also menaced by the Mohammedans. When it became known that no fewer than 300,000 Turks were advancing on the imperial capital, Pope Innocent ordered that rosaries be recited in the religious houses and churches of Rome. The same prayers of supplication were offered throughout the Empire. Still, the situation was so dangerous that the imperial court left Vienna for Passau and took refuge there. Meantime, there were special devotions at the Capuchin Church in Vienna to Our Lady Help of Christians, whose famous picture hangs there. It would become the symbol of the victory over the Turks by Poland’s King John Sobieski when he arrived on the scene after a series of forced marches from Czestochowa.

The Polish army hit the numerically superior Turkish force with their surprise attack so hard, the Turks panicked. They did not simply withdraw from the walls of Vienna, they fled. (It is an aside, but of some cultural significance, that such was the Turkish flight, they left behind virtually all their stores and baggage. This is when the Viennese, Europe’s most famous coffee-drinkers, discovered the stuff. The Turks left quantities of it in their stores when they ran.) More to the point, in thanksgiving for the help given by the Mother of God for the victory at Vienna, which was won on her feast day, the 30th day after the Assumption, Pope Innocent extended the feast in honor of the Holy Name of Mary to the Universal Church.

What isn’t mentioned here is that Sobieski began the forced marches to Vienna from the shrine of Our Lady of Czestochowa, where he mounted his charger on the Feast of the Assumption, August 15, 1683, to arrive in Vienna almost a month later.

There were three occasions in the defense of Christendom against Islam in which Europe was saved by a John: John Hunyadi, the Hungarian King, and hero of the Battle of Belgrade, Don Juan of Austria, who led the Christian navies at the Battle of Lepanto, and Jan Sobieski, King of Poland. On each of these instances, the Christian people sang with gratitude, “There was a man sent from God whose name was John,” applying to the hero the description of the Baptist from the prologue of St. John’s Gospel.

After 12 hours of fighting, Sobieski’s Polish force held the high ground on the right. At about five o’clock in the afternoon, after watching the ongoing infantry battle from the hills for the whole day, four cavalry groups, one of them Austrian-German, and the other three Polish, totaling 20,000 men, charged down the hills. The attack was led by the Polish king in front of a spearhead of 3000 heavily armed winged Polish lancer hussars. This charge broke the lines of the Ottomans, who were tired from the long fight on two sides. In the confusion, the cavalry headed straight for the Ottoman camps, while the remaining Vienna garrison sallied out of its defenses and joined in the assault.The Ottoman army were tired and dispirited following the failure of both the sapping attempt and the brute force assault of the city, and the arrival of the cavalry turned the tide of battle against them, sending them into retreat to the south and east. In less than three hours after the cavalry attack, the Christian forces had won the battle and saved Vienna from capture.After the battle, Sobieski paraphrased Julius Caesar‘s famous quote by saying “veni, vidi, Deus vincit” – “I came, I saw, God conquered”

source: https://catholicism.org/the-battle-of-vienna-and-the-holy-name-of-mary.html

#Catholic History #islam #the battle of vienna #17th century #winged hussars #poland #catholic #polish history #vienna #Christian

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vladdocs · 3 years ago

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From the Order of the Dragon to Dracula - Constantin Rezachevici [Professor Constantin Rezachevici is chief researcher at the Nicolae Iorga National Institute of History, a member of the Romanian Academy, and Professor with the Faculty of History at the University of Bucharest. He is author of The History of the Neighbouring Countries and the Romanian People in the Middle Ages (1998).] ___________ The name “Dracula” has witnessed periods of both brilliance and fame. It became famous in the second half of the fifteenth century through the actions of Vlad Tepes (Dracula), ruler of Wallachia (1448, 1456- 1462, 1476).i It has continued to exist, although less known, through his legitimate descendants, the noble family Dracula of Sintesti and of Band, established in Transylvania between the fifteenth and seventeenth centuries. Families that originated from Vlad’s marriage to a close relative of the Hungarian King Matias Corvin in February of 1462 can provide an explanation of the Szekely ancestry wrongly attributed to Vlad Tepes and his literary metamorphosis the vampire Count Dracula. As a result of the novel of Irish writer Bram Stoker, the name “Dracula” has obtained universal fame during the modern epoch. The origin of the name “Dracula” has a very interesting history, very different from what has been commonly believed. For a long time, many theories have existed about its genesis, ranging from the claim by Grigore Nandris that it was the genitive Slavonic form meaning “the son of Dracul” (Vlad Dracul was the ruler of Wallachia from 1437-1442 and 1444-1447) to the false connection with a coincidentally similar Romanian word “dragulea”, meaning the dear one or lover.ii All these theories are connected to the starting point of this name exclusively for Vlad Tepes, until this popular name, meaning “son of Dracul” became confused with the Romanian word “Dracul”, meaning “the devil” (Andreescu 149-50). To clarify matters, Dracula (Draculea) has represented from the beginning a new popular Romanian form (from the name Vlad Dracul) applied to Vlad Dracul’s famous son Vlad Tepes (Andreescu 156, Stoicescu 201), while the nickname given to Vlad by the Turks was “Tepes”, the Romanian word for impaler. Even before Vlad Tepes’ reign in Romania, the boyar Albu had called Vlad Dracul (which was a nickname known outside of Romania), simply Draculea (Andreescu 150-51), the popular exclusively Romanian name. The Venetian messenger Bartholomeo de Jano and his contemporary Greek chroniclers Leonicos Chalkokondyles and Critobul of Imbros have also called him Draculea (Andreescu 154-55). Even Iancu of Hunedora, who executed him, made mention on December 17, 1456, of “infidelem Drakwlam wayvodem” (Documenta 461). In the end, the Turkish chronicler Asakpasazade, referring to the year 1442, calls Vlad Tepes “Dracula” instead of “Draculea” (Cronici 88), while the Serb janissary who wrote from 1496 to 1501, called him “voievodul valah Dracula” (Calatori 125), which in English means the Wallachian prince Dracula. It is clear that Draculea (Dracula) was a popular nickname for Vlad Dracul, meaning a person belonging to the Order of the Dragon. For his son, Vlad Tepes, the name “Dracula” became through affiliation an alternative, not only a nickname, with the side effect of increasing his bad reputation, with its diabolical meaning, even though originally, in his father’s days, “Dracul” did not have a malevolent meaning. Vlad (the father) had obtained the nickname “Dracul” in connection with his receiving the Order of the Dragon from Hungary’s king Sigismund of Luxembourg, at Nürnberg around February 8, 1431. The German name for this order was “Drachenordens,” and in Latin “Societatis draconistarum.” The Order of the Dragon, which some confuse with a decoration, was really an institution, just like the other chivalric orders in medieval times.iii As a model, Sigismund of Luxembourg took

the Order of St. George (Societas militae Sancti Georgii) created by the king of Hungary Carol Robert of Anjou (1308_1342) in 1318. Its statute from 1326 requires the protection of the king from any danger or plot against him; the symbol of the Order of the Dragon was a red cross on a silver field and a black mantle. With the exception of the last object, these are also found in the new order. In a battle with the anarchical Hungarian nobles and in the background of the other battles for the possession of Bosnia, Sigismund of Luxembourg and the queen Barbara Cilli created the Order of the Dragon on December 12, 1408, mainly meant to protect the king and his family, with the help of a big part of the Hungarian nobility, led by the families of Gara and Cilli. The statute of this Order of the Dragon, elaborated by the chancellor of the Hungarian court, Eberhard, bishop of Oradea, maintained only in a copy from 1707 and published in a Hungarian edition in 1841, has remained almost unknown, even to the investigators of this problem. The analysis of this important document shows that the order aimed at defending the cross and at the destruction of its enemies, symbolized by the ancient Dragons (Draconis tortuosi) with the help of St. George. The battle was against the Turkish pagan armies and the husits, who were outside the Orthodox nations who were faithful to the cross and to King Sigismund (Romanians etc). Barons, priests and leaders of the kingdom gathered below the sign of the dragon, submitted to the cross and proclaimed loyalty to King Sigismund and the queen. The members who founded the order were 24 nobles of the kingdom, led by the despot Stefan Lazarevici, the leader of Serbia, among whom were Nicolae of Gara, the Hungarian prince, Stibor of Stibericz, the prince of Transylvania, Pipo of Ozora, the Ban (local ruler) of Severin etc, in general great local noblemen. They were all engaged in serving with loyalty no matter the price, the royal couple, their family and their friends. The symbol of the order was, after the statute of 1408, a circular dragon with its tail coiled up around its neck. On its back, from the base of its neck to its tail, was the red cross of St. George, on the background of a silver field. According to the first Medieval encyclopedist, Isidor of Seville, it was a “serpens,” a dragon that lives on land. As the years went by, the Order of the Dragon expanded, including two classes, a superior one, whose symbol was a dragon being strangled with a cross stretched out on its back, which, especially from the late fifteenth century to the seventeenth century surrounded a family coat-of-arms. Sometimes foreign members were allowed in, but only as allies, who did not have to take the oath of eternal loyalty to King Sigismund of Luxembourg, for example, the king of Poland, Vladislav Jagiello, his former brother-in-law Vitautas (Witold), the great duke of Lithuania, King Henry the fifth of England, the members of the Italian families Carrara, della Scala and leaders of Venezia, Padova and Verona. During the life of King Sigismund, from 1408 to 1437, the Order of the Dragon became the most important noble political association in Hungary, loyal to the king, the main political force in the kingdom, second to the king. Immediately after being established, it served as a model for the setting up in 1409 of the Spanish order of Calatrava. Into this prestigious European chivalic institution, which was symbolized by the dragon, was admitted the aspirant to the Wallachian throne, Vlad (Dracul) in February 1431, in his position of vassal of Sigismund of Luxemburg, according to the statute of the Order. Admission was into the superior

class of the order. The symbol of this class evolved up to 1431 in two phases: the first one, as it has been reminded earlier, was a dragon with a cross drawn on his back, between its wings, from the base of the neck to its tail and lasted from 1408 to 1418; the second one, until the death of Sigismund of Luxembourg, was completed with another cross perpendicular to the coiled up dragon, having on the equal sides of the cross the writing “O quam misericors est Deus” (vertical) and “Justus et paciens” (horizontal). This sign was worn on a sash, like in the portrait of Dichters Oswald von Wallenstein in 1432. The necklace of the order was made of two gold chains joined by the sign, a Hungarian cross with a double bar above the coiled up dragon. But on the seal, another dragon was represented, with a big body, with dented wings, not coiled, only two feet with a free tail, with a very small Greek cross on its chest. Sigismund of Luxembourg himself introduced in 1433 the seal for the Order of the Dragon of this type, one of the last seals he made as a Roman-German emperor. Unfortunately, the symbol that Vlad Dracul had wasn’t kept. But the elements of the symbol of the Order of the Dragon on his royal seal of 1437 clearly show that Vlad Dracul was the possessor of the Order of the Dragon necklace: the Hungarian double cross, instead of the Latin cross; the dragon illustrated on the reverse of the six silver and bronze coins that were beat by Vlad at Sighisoara in Transylvania (or after his occupation of the Wallachian throne) is similar to the dragon in Paolo Uccello’s picture, St. George and the dragon; and the coat-of-arms from the episcopacy built by him at Curtea de Arges. Furthermore, he transformed the dragon from the seal to his personal coat-of-arms, not directly but as an original heraldry composition. This coat-of-arms was carved from stone, and represented the dragon attacking a lion, the headed snake, the dragon, emerging victoriously from this battle, therefore illustrating metaphorically Psalm 90 (“You will step on lions and on vipers and walk over lion cubs and snakes”). This phrase’s purpose was to symbolize the victory of Christianity and that of Vlad Dracul over his enemies. In this case the dragon was a benefic symbol, and the picture of Vlad with his name (Dracul, Draculea-Dracula) had a positive meaning which was only common in Wallachia during his reign. The spreading of the image of the dragon by Vlad Dracul through the large circulation of seal, small coins and heraldic stone carving had a powerful impression on its Romanian subjects. This was increased by the Order of the Dragon necklace, which no other Romanian ruler had worn, and even more so the ceremonial costume of the Order of the Dragon knights - red garments and green mantle. Thus, Vlad Dracul, the father of Vlad Tepes, has forever remained in a bond with both versions of his nickname. This paradox has been interpreted incorrectly. The dragon of the order with the same name was not an evil element during the fifteenth century, but a positive symbol of knighthood. The dragon choking itself with its own tail, which in Occidental St. George heraldry and iconography, from where it originates, represented the defeated Satan, becomes, in the absence of the saint and of the cross, a Christian chivalry order of positive significance. The circular dragon, strangled by its own tail, is represented on the coat-of-arms of many noble families in the Hungarian kingdom who were the descendants of some of the knights who were part of the Order of the Dragon during the reign of Sigismund, until the seventeenth century. This supports the fact that the Order of the Dragon enjoyed great prestige throughout the first half of the fifteenth century. In Transylvania, it also appeared in the coats-of-arms of the families

Bathory, Bocskay, Bethlen, Szathmary, Rakoczi and many others, even though the Order of the Dragon had lost its importance after the death of Sigismund of Luxembourg in 1437 and it practically disappeared with the demise of the members who had been admitted by him. Over five millennia of the dragon’s universal existence, it went through many transformations until the fifteenth century and it was known as a fabulous creature, sometimes with the head of a vulture, other times like the animal represented on the Order of the Dragon, with the body of a snake and the wings of a bat. The European Dragon had a lot of sources: Greek mythology (dracon), Roman_Greek tradition, Celtic mythology, the Bible, the Apocalypse, the lives of saints and Oriental influences. During pre- Christian times, the dragon often had a beneficial meaning (often connected with fecundity) and perpetuated in folklore until the late Middle Ages. However, in literature, culture and clerical Christianity, starting from Bibical text, it takes on a different role, and in the fifth century it becomes a symbol of Satan -- “draco iste significat diabolum” (Le Goff 58). This dragon, identified with Satan, was defeated and was dominated by spiritual forces but was not killed; rather, according to the symbolism of Celtic folklore, at some extent, “they even became allied with it” (Le Goff 45), by numerous saints and bishops of the Occident. In the art of Roman influence, the crutch of the bishop often has a defeated and twisted dragon at its tip. Both St. Michael and St. George, whose cult began to spread from the Bizant during the eighth and throughout the tenth, and respectively eleventh centuries, defeated the dragon physically in a fight. In Occidental heraldry, the physical strength of the dragon was said to have been in his head, but also in its big and strong tail, which in the nineteenth century was considered the illustrative element of the dragon. All this European clerical and folklore heraldry, strengthened in a millenary existence (from the fifth century to the fifteenth century) can be identified in the basic illustration of the Order of the Dragon, the snake-like dragon that is strangling himself with his own tail, which, according to tradition, is twisted three times around the dragon’s neck, signifying that he had been subdued by means of Christian spiritual powers, and the dragon with big paws and wings was the symbol of the one who was defeated by the Saints Michael and George. However, we must also remember the fact that, despite the fact that it had been defeated and subdued, the snake-like dragon and the flying dragon still were evil and the symbols of Satan. In the Romanian space to which Vlad Dracul and his son Vlad Tepes belonged, the dragon, named “balaur”, a thraco_dacian word, or “zmeu”, a slavonic word, had its roots in geto-dacian antiquity, whose military flag was representing a snake with the head of a wolf, included the large category of dragons used as flags, which one finds from the times of the Greeks and Romans until the fifteenth century. This divinity represented on the “geto-dacian” flag, became known in the time of the Roman ruling of Dacia as “draco” (in Romanian “drac” (meaning devil). Along with Christianity, it spread all throughout Europe, and came to symbolize Satan. However in pagan terms, as the Romanian historian Vasile Parvan observed, “out of all the Romance languages, the Romanian language was the only one in which ‘draco’ has the meaning of an evil spirit, demon or devil, whereas in others, the word only has the meaning of snake or dragon” (228-30). In Romanian folklore, even the snake, which in certain conditions, has the ability to turn into a dragon, has a strong malefic meaning. If “Dracul” and “Draculea” have a positive meaning in connection with the Order of the Dragon during Vlad Dracul’s time and later on during

Vlad Tepes’ reign, the same words have an exclusively negative, diabolical meaning, synonymous to the Romanian word “dracul” (the devil), without doubt in connection to the bloody and law_enforcing character of Vlad. In 1459, the aspirant Dan III, accused his rival “Draculea” (Vlad Tepes) of collaborating with the Turks, aided and guided by the devil (Tocilescu 71-2), and in 1460 mentioned “the law-offender and barbaric tyrant, unfaithful and the devil that is Vlad Voievod” (Harmuzeki 53). During Vlad Tepes’ captivity in Hungary (1462-1475), the representative of the pope in Buda, Nicolaede Madrussa, declared that he saw “their tyrant Dracul, a name which they [Romanians] use for the Devil” Papacostea (164). In 1486, the author of the Novel about Dracula voievod, translated in Russian, referred to “Dracula in Romanian, and in our language - devil, that’s how evil he was” (Panaitescu 200, 207). Although Vlad Tepes and his descendants have never used the symbol of the Order of the Dragon, he has inherited the nickname of his father Draculea/Dracula, which has become a family name (outside the country). And his successors in Transylvania, the Dracula (Draculea) family kept this name until the seventeenth century, settling in the sixteenth century among the “secui,” not far from the place where in 1897, Bram Stoker, located the setting of his novel and the Transylvania castle of “Count Dracula.” This way, over a long period of time, from the name of a small pagan deity (Greek, dracos, Latin draco), by means of the name of the Order of the Dragon (in German Drachenordens, Latin Societas draconistarum) to the fifteenth century Romanian nickname of Dracul/Draculea from which the nickname and then the family name, Dracula, comes and was used in 1897 by Bram Stoker, at the suggestion of the Hungarian Jewish orientalist, well known scholar of his time (Florescu & McNally 142-3). If the Order of the Dragon did not exist, with all its symbols and its being awarded to a Romanian Ruler, the name “Dracula” would not be famous today. _____ Works Cited: Andreescu, Stefan. Vlad Tepes (Dracula) intre legenda si adevar istoric. Bucharest, 1976. Calatori straini despre tarile romane. Bucharest, 1970. Cronici turcesti privind tarile romana. Bucharest 1966. Documenta Romaniae Historica. Bucharest, 1977. Florescu, Radu & Raymond McNally. In cautarea lui Dracula. Bucharest, 1992. Harmizachi, Eudoxiu. Documente privitoare la istoria romanilor. Bucharest, 1911. Le Goff, Jacques. “Cultura ecleziastica si sultura folclorica in evul mediu.” Pentru un alt evmediu, II. Bucharest, 1986. Nandris, Grigore. “A Philological Analysis of Dracula and Romanian Place-names and Masculine Personal Names in -a, -ea.” The Slavonic and East European Review. 36 (1959): 370-77. Panaitescu, P P (ed), Cronicile slavo-romane din sec. XV-XVI publicate de Ion Bogdan. Bucharest, 1959. Papacostea, Serban. “Cu privire la geneza si raspandirea povestirilor despre factele lui Vlad Tepes.” Romanoslavica 13 (1966). Parvan, Vasile. “Contributii epigrafice la istoria crestinismului daco-roman.” Studii de istoria culturii antice. Bucharest, 1992. Stoicescu, Nicolae. Vlad Tepes. Bucharest, 1976.

#Vlad voda #Vlad Tepes #Vlad Dracula #vlad the impaler #Ladislau Dragkwlya #documents #history #wallachia #romania #vlad dracula tepes #order of the dragon #Constantin Rezachevici #From the Order of the Dragon to Dracula

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argyrocratie · 2 years ago

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“My short stay in Prague was enough to convince me that I was not mistaken in hoping to find in Bohemia all the elements necessary for a successful revolution. Bohemia, in fact, was then in the most complete anarchy. The revolutionary conquests of the month of March (die Märzerrungenschaften, according to the favorite expression of the time), already annihilated in the other parts of the Austrian Empire, were still in full bloom in Bohemia. The Austrian government still needed the Slavs and it was unwilling, was afraid, to apply reactionary measures to them. Also, in Prague and in all Bohemia, the unlimited freedom of the clubs, of the popular meetings and of the press reigned without restriction; this freedom went so far that the Viennese students and other refugees from the Austrian capital, who in Vienna would simply have been shot, walked openly in the streets of Prague and lived under their own names, all without having anything to fear.

Everyone, in the towns and in the villages, was armed and discontented; discontented and distrustful, for one felt the approach of reaction and one feared losing the rights one had recently won; in the villages, they feared the return of the threatening aristocracy and the re-establishment of the old serfdom; finally, the enlistments which had just been announced had brought discontent to its height, and everywhere, in fact, people were ready for an insurrection.

On the other hand, there were then very few soldiers in Bohemia and those who were there came from Hungarian regiments worked by an irresistible spirit of revolt. At that time, when students met Hungarian soldiers in the street, they approached them shouting: “Long live Kossuth!” And the soldiers answer with the same cry, without worrying about the presence of the officers; when Hungarian soldiers were sent to arrest a student for a fight or fight with the police, the soldiers fraternized with the students and, together with them, they beat up the police. In a word, the dispositions of the Hungarian regiments were such that as soon as the news reached of the revolutionary movement which had just broken out in Dresden, the half-squadron cantoned on the frontier mutinied and hastened to cross into Saxony without having received any orders.

(...)

Finally, to complete this picture, it should be added that Austrian finances were then in a deplorable state: in Bohemia, we no longer knew state notes, but notes issued by private persons; every banker, every merchant had his assignats; there even circulated small coins in wood and leather, such as exist only among peoples occupying the lowest degree of civilization.”

-from Mikhail Bakunin’s “Confession” to the Tzar Nicholas I (1851)

#Mikhail Bakunin #bohemia #revolutions of 1848 #springtimes of the peoples

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budapestbug · 4 years ago

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Where luxury meets history This 'wow' building of #Budapest originally was designed for Baron József Brudern by Mihály Pollack, also the architect of the Hungarian National Museum. By the time it was completed in 1817, people had already started to call it Párisi Udvar (Paris Court) or Párisi House. Baron Brudern himself lived on the second floor, and there were 32 shops were located on the ground floor. The shops were the most elegant and luxurious in the city. It was believed that the attraction-seeking, breath-taking building was designed by Pollack as a replica of the Parisian Passage des Panoramas, from where it took its name. In 1906 it became the home of Budapest’s Central Savings Bank, and was redesigned entirely. And this is the form one can see now! This rebuilt happened between 1909 and 1913 by a Hungarian bank in need of spiffy new headquarters Most of the original structure was demolished and rebuilt, and bank offices and apartments were added upstairs. In the spirit of the era, something splashy was in order, resulting in a mix of #ArtDeco, Neo-Gothic, #Moorish, and #ArtNouveau details, with enough ceramic, metal, and wood ornamentation to adorn a town, let alone a building. With its glass domes, turrets, tiled façade, and gargoyles, it’s the kind of exquisite historical confection that once prompted the late, great chef and cultural observer #anthonybearden to describe Budapest’s architecture as “building porn.” Although the Párisi Udvar (or “Paris Court”) survived both World Wars, the building suffered when the Iron Curtain was drawn on Hungary after World War II, and some ghosts of its Soviet past still lingered. The façade was damaged during the revolution of 1956, and further travesties ensued during a renovation in the 1960s. In an attempt to stabilize the glass arcade, for instance, gobs of cement were applied to its steel framework, which eventually caused it to rust. All that steel had to be replaced while preserving the fragile glass panels within. The last four-year renovation finished in 2019 has brought the #BelleÉpoque arcade back to its sparkling former glory. The restored courtyard reopened as part of The Unbound Collection by #Hyatt in June 2019, https://cpp-luxury.com/stunning-heritage-parisi-udvar.../

#travel Budapest

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ayearinfaith · 4 years ago

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𝗔 𝗬𝗲𝗮𝗿 𝗶𝗻 𝗙𝗮𝗶𝘁𝗵, 𝗗𝗮𝘆 𝟳𝟯: 𝗢𝗱𝗶𝗻 “I know that I hung on a wind-rocked tree/nine whole nights/with a spear wounded, and to Odin offered/myself to myself/on that tree, of which no one knows/from what root it springs./Bread no one gave me, nor a horn of drink/downward I peered/to runes applied myself, wailing learnt them/then fell down thence.” - 𝘏𝘢́𝘷𝘢𝘮𝘢́𝘭, stanza 138-9, as translated by Benjamin Thorpe Odin is the chief of the Norse gods, known in other Germanic languages as Woden, Wuotan, and the like. He is the namesake of the English weekday “Wednesday”. His name means “lord of the frenzied”. 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗢𝘂𝘁𝗹𝗶𝗲𝗿 𝗚𝗼𝗱 The earliest records of native Germanic religion, with Odin as chief deity, come from 1st century Roman records. The Roman’s took after the Greek tradition of conceiving the gods of foreign peoples as different versions of their own. Thus, the Roman’s refer to Odin as the “Germanic Mercury”. To those familiar with Roman and Germanic lore, this may seem an odd comparison. Odin is the chief of his pantheon, associated with wisdom, warfare, and magic, while Mercury is a messenger god associated with healing. Understand, the options were limited: the major gods Jupiter (storm and sky) and Mars (war) were already clear choices for Thor (storms) and Tyr (war). In fact, the Romans may have unwittingly stumbled upon a peculiar feature of Odin; he doesn’t seem to fit in the Indo-European religious family. By contrast, Thor, Odin’s son, has readily apparent cousins all across the Indo-European spectrum (ex. the Greek Zeus, Hindu Indra, Slavic Perun), all members of the Sky Father archetype. There is a commonly accepted etymological link between the name of the clan of gods to which Odin belongs, the Æsir, and a Hindu denomination of supernatural being, the Asuras. Both words are generally thought to come from a common Indo-European root meaning something like “life force”, though there are also theories that the root is actually a loan from the Uralic languages (ex. Finnish, Hungarian, Udmurt). If true, it could imply that Odin, and the two-clan division of Norse gods, is actually a loan from Uralic cultures, and it would make Odin a closer relative of the Finnish Väinämöinen than any other European divinity. The slow to Christianize Scandinavians also made a connection of their own, comparing Odin’s self-sacrifice on the world tree (more on this later) to the crucifixion of Jesus Christ. 𝗪𝗶𝘀𝗱𝗼𝗺 𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗸𝗲𝗿 Modern attributions often give Odin the title of “god of war”, though that would more accurately fall to a separate member of the same pantheon; Tyr. Odin presides over many forces including magic, poetry, battle, and death, but above all he is mostly renowned for the seeking and dispersal of wisdom. Some of the most striking imagery of Odin is related to this. His single eye is the price paid in order to drink from the well of wisdom. His ravens keep him aware of all things happening in the world. Even the world tree is named for this: “Yggdrasil” is “Odin’s (Ygg is one of his many names) Horse”, horse being a common allusion to gallows. This is a reference to one of the more striking scenes of the Norse canon, in which Odin hangs himself, after impaling himself on his own spear, from the world tree for nine days in order to die and gain the knowledge of the dead. Knowledge of the dead, in this context, is specifically that of runes, which in Norse culture are both emblematic of writing (and thus academia and poetry) and also of mysticism. Odin’s use of magic is in itself indicative of his dedication; the use of magic was considered a feminine trait and Odin, the divine patriarch himself, is willing to disrupt cultural norms for knowledge. One of the major sections of the poetic 𝘌𝘥𝘥𝘢 (a primary source of Norse canon previously covered in this series) is the 𝘏𝘢́𝘷𝘢𝘮𝘢́𝘭, “Words of the High One (Odin)” which is a series of proverbs and poems attributed directly to Odin, intended as educational philosophy. 𝗜𝗺𝗮𝗴𝗲𝗿𝘆 Odin is traditionally depicted either as a general on his horse or a cloaked wanderer. This second depiction, as a bearded man with a wide brimmed hat and a staff (representing either his magic wand or spear) full of wisdom and obscuring his true power, may seem familiar to readers of modern fantasy as a textbook wizard. This is not coincidence. Most modern versions of wizards borrow heavily from one specific wizard: J.R.R. Tolkien’s Gandalf, who was inspired by the wandering Odin. Odin has a host of animal companions, the aforementioned ravens, Huginn and Muninn (lit. “thought” and “memory” who bring him news, the wolves Geri and Freki (lit. “greedy” and “ravenous”), and the eight-legged, and thus twice as good as regular, horse Sleipnir (lit. “slippery”). In addition to the animals, Odin is also often depicted with the preserved head of the god Mimir, also a wisdom god, with whom Odin consults. Odin wields the spear Gugnir (lit. “swaying”), which could hit any target it was thrown at and possesses a gold ring, Draupnir (lit. “dripper”) which replicated itself nine-fold every nine nights. The numbers three and nine (aka. three groups of three) were considered sacred in ancient Germanic cultures, which is likely the source of one of Odin’s most recognizable symbols, the valknut, which depicts three interlaced triangles. Image Credit: Odin som vandringsman (“Odin in the guise of a wanderer”), Georg von Rosen, 1886.

#A Year in Faith #Odin #AYIF #Religion #mythology #day 73

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mrcurrygoestospain · 3 years ago

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Camino De Santiago - Round 5

Spain travel log, 2021…

Day One:

September 20 - Depart Seattle for Madrid, by way of London. There were plenty of issues just getting to this point. In addition to the ongoing concerns over COVID-19, or perhaps because of them, I had some serious concerns about whether I could and whether I should do this trip at all. In the end, I think I simply realized that it was totally appropriate for me to go on this trip: I’ve been “responsible” and taken the full round of vaccinations, generally avoided social contacts with people and been diligent about the masks. So I made my reservations and thought everything was fine. About 2 weeks before takeoff, I got an email from Iberia that one of my flights had been changed. When I looked into it, I found that it was the connecting flight from London to Madrid and the schedule had been bumped up by about 6 hours taking me from having a 2 hour layover in Heathrow to needing to be on a plane for Madrid 4 hours before I actually landed in London and would be able to board it… It took attempts at phone calls over several days to get this corrected. Finally, I tried while I was at top work one morning around 5:00 am. I finally got through and a nice lady helped rebook my connecting flight. She found the only available flight on that day that would work; now I have a seven hour layover.

I prepped for my trip, checklists and routes planned. I arrived at the airport 3 hours early, just in case. Although I booked with Iberia, it was a British flight. So standing in line at the BA counter in SeaTac, I saw the sign: “All passengers must show proof of a negative COVID test.” What? I’d already checked multiple times; I only need proof of vaccination to get into Spain. I check the internet. Sure enough, if you’re on a layover in England, you need a negative test…A quick Google search helped me find a testing center at SeaTac airport, so I rushed down to baggage claim number nine to see if I could get a test in time. In all honesty, I really thought I wasn’t going to make it and I’d have to try to contact the airline again to find a way to reschedule my flight. I stood in the line for what seemed like forever, but finally had the privilege of paying $250 for a rapid COVID test. T- minus 2 hours 30 minutes to departure and they promised results in 1-1.5 hours. The test itself was relatively painless. After all of the horror stories I’d heard about the nasal swabs, I was a bit worried. But it didn’t hurt, it just tickled a little bit. I waited, and waited…it seemed like they would never have my results. While I waited, I heard stories from other travelers who had missed flights or rebooking because of these ridiculous COVID-related requirements. One young Canadian lady I spoke to shared that she’d spent over $1000 on COVID tests in the last month due to traveling. I guess my $250 wasn’t so much.

I finally got my negative test results and rushed back to the check in counter, filled out the required government forms and headed through security. The flight was delayed.

After a nine hour flight to London, I had seven or eight hours to kill in Heathrow Airport, Terminal 5, before boarding my flight to Madrid. I shopped, I ate, I listened to podcasts. I took a few naps and generally cursed British Airways for changing my original flight. Some Italian guy made quite a scene at the boarding gate for the flight to Madrid. The gate agent handled it quite well and passive-aggressively punished him for his demeanor.

I arrived in Madrid after an easy flight on Iberia, made my way to the metro and on to my Hostel. It was a nice enough place. After 28 hours of travel, I was ready for a shower and bed.

Day 2:

On my one day in Madrid, I walked from my hostel/hotel to the Museo Nacional del Prado. It’s Spain’s greatest art museum. This was my second time there and I spent a lot more of it. There are so many amazing pieces and, for someone who used to truly despise art, it was amazing. I highly recommend it. I haven’t been to a whole lot of art museums, but it is, by far, my favorite. I followed that with a walk through the Royal Botanical Gardens. I’m sure they’re great when all of the flowers are blooming, but in early fall, it’s just a lot of green. Either way, it was still peaceful. I visited another nearby park, walked around and viewed the statues, and then made my way back towards the hotel and passed it to go to the Cathedral opposite the royal palace. It’s a much more modern cathedral than the ones I’ll see on the Camino, but still impressive.

Day 3:

On the morning of the third day, I got up early and got packed. Took the metro to the train station and purchased a ticket to Leon. After two hours on the train, I took a 20 minute walk to the hotel and dropped off my bag, and then spent the next few hours wandering the city. I found a barber and got a haircut for 9 Euro, quite a bargain. Stopped at the “Taste of America” shop to get a bottle of hot sauce (Cholula, of course), and just meandered around the city until I could get checked in at the hotel. It was a pretty uneventful day, which is just what I needed. I was still very tired from all of the traveling and trying to swap schedules.

Day 4:

I got up late, around 8:00 AM and started walking the city. I stopped for a cafe con leche and met a Scottish couple who had been walking the Camino for the last few weeks. While we waited out the rain under cover, the shared with me some of their other walking adventures, including tales of walking through the Swiss Alps on the Via Francigena, a pilgrimage route to Rome. I may have to look into that for a future trip. I also shared with them my plans/considerations of taking a walk on the “Great Glen Way” in Scotland. The wife had already done this and highly recommended it, along with the West Highland Way. Both are approximately 5-day walks through some of the wild country of Scotland. When the rain let up, we parted ways and I went to tour the Cathedral, toured the Basilica of Saint Isidore and wandered around town, shopping and eating. Inside the Saint Isidore museum and basilica, i had the opportunity to see what is referred to as the “Sistine Chapel of Romanesque Art” as well as a gold and silver cup that some historians claim is the “holy grail.”

Day 5:

Didn’t sleep much…I forgot how much they like to party in Spain. It was LOUD all night long. Anyway, started my walk. Today was about 27 km and it rained through about 50% of the day. It was a mix of roads and dirt tracks. I only saw one other pilgrim, a Spaniard who doesn’t speak any English. I got ahead of him and had stopped for a rest at a picnics table on top of a mountain. He showed up a few minutes behind me and I tried to chat for a minute, but the language barrier…. I offered him half of my tangerine and then he took off again. I passed him up later. I had been slightly worried about where to stay for the night as the municipal albergue in this province/state are currently closed due to the ‘Rona, but when I got to town I found a pension with rooms available. The lovely lady named Susana showed me to a room and also worked tirelessly to make me a reservation for the following night. I hadn’t eaten much for the day, so I ordered big: hot dog and patatas oil bravas. Patatas bravas is a traditional dish in Spain which is made of fried potatoe cubes that are covered in a (typically) spicy tomato sauce. Potatoes Ali Oli are the same fried potatoes but with a garlic cream sauce instead of the spicy sauce. This one combined both sauces. It was nice. The inside of the restaurant/bar/cafe was very loud with a bunch of men playing a card game I’m not familiar with, so I went outside to have a beer. An older Spaniard, named Hilario, came out and started trying to talk to me. I explained that I am American and I don’t speak much Spanish, but he disagreed. So he went inside and got another man, a Hungarian who had been in Spain for the last 25 years, named Fernanco(?) who was extremely drunk, to come out and talk to me. He was so drunk, he introduced himself as “muy borracho” or “very drunk” and the proceeded to tell me that he used to be a muy Thai fighter and a coal miner and now he was just a fat drunk who collected money from the government because he got hit in the head too many times. At least I THINK that’s what they were saying…. I went to bed early to get a good rest and let my aching feet and hips recover before a long day tomorrow….from La Robla to Poladura, should be about 25km or so with some very intense climbs. We’ll see.

I’m currently on the Camino San Salvador, which is a route from Leon to Oviedo. They say “whoever goes to Santiago without visiting Oviedo, goes to the servant but not to the Lord.” This is because Oviedo is famous for having a specific relic. While most people are aware of the Shroud of Turin, which is the burial cloth of Jesus, many don’t know (including me, until recently) that traditional Jewish burial included placing a cloth over the face of the deceased immediately after death and until the body was prepared for burial. This cloth would then be removed and the full-body cloth would be applied. So anyway, this Cathedral boasts possession of the face covering that was placed over Jesus’ head, likely immediately after the spear pearled his side and before he was brought down off of the cross. Once I complete the Camino San Salvador (about 5 days, I hope), I will continue on to the Camino Primitivo, one of the many Camino’s de Santiago. So the Camino San Salvador goes to the relics of Christ and the Camino Santiago (Santiago = Saint James) goes to the resting place and remains of Saint James (the major), also known as “Santiago Matamoros” or “Saint James the Moor Slayer”, the patron saint of Spain.

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kingedwardvi · 4 years ago

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Calendar of State Papers Foreign: Edward VI 1547-1553

May 16. Augsburg.: The Bishop of Westminster to the Council. On the 8th had received their letters of the 2d by Bluemantle, and had audience of the Emperor on the 12th as to granting licence for recruiting Germans, seeing that the French King by secret practices had got Germans to aid the Scots, who were enemies both of the Emperor and King of England.

The Emperor expressed his desire to maintain amity, but cannot consent to give such licence without concurrence of the estates, and referred him to Granvelle; the interview with whom on Sunday the 13th he details.

Informed by him that the Emperor has instructed the Regent to signify to the French King that as he sends his ships to aid the Emperor's enemies the Scots, they shall not be permitted to enter or have supplies at any of the Emperor's ports.

The same expressions of amity, but steady refusal of licence repeated. Touching the practising of the French King with the King of Denmark for aiding the Scots, Granvelle is directed to confer with the Danish Ambassador. It is plain no other aid can be looked for than what can be obtained at the hands of the Regent of Flanders. [Three pages.].

The Bishop of Westminster to Sir William Petre. The English must trust to themselves, as he sees that these men will yet hold up fair with France, and yet in words they would make him believe other.

Had written to him by the ordinary post on the 15th intimating the long-looked for arrival here of Prosperus de Sancta Cruce, who was expected to bring the Bishop of Rome's resolution upon the Interim, and now is said to have brought nothing relating to it.

Last night the Interim was published to the States, with exhortation to all Catholics to continue in their old religion and to all who had swerved from it to return; they that will not are commanded under great pains to keep the Interim until order be taken by the General Council. Sends letters from Mr. Mount (missing). [One page.]

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May 20. Holm.-- Gustavus I., King of Sweden, to the Lord Protector. Complaining that in the wars between England and Scotland the merchant vessels of Sweden, which was strictly neutral and had done no injury, had contrary to the law of nations been seized and pillaged as those of a common enemy, and requesting that any of their ships in the possession of the English may be restored to them. [Latin. Three pages.]

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May 22. Holm.95. The Lords and Councillors of Sweden to same. Desiring the establishment of a commercial treaty between England and Sweden. [Latin. Three pages.]

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May 25. Ronay by Brienne. Dr. Wotton to the Lord Protector. The King, who is here at certain places of the Duke of Guise, is not likely to leave for 10 or 12 days, when he will probably go to Anserville, near St. Diziers; but since that place is near to Bar, there may be some meeting with the Duchess of Lorraine, as something likely is ado, seeing the Cardinal of Guise has gone thither.

Their removal to Lyons is still reported, and the Queen of Navarre is ready to proceed there to be at her daughter's marriage. The younger Bonivet, that was Bishop of Bosiers, was shot at the musters in Brittany, on his way to Scotland. Pietro Strozzi had been in danger of like death.

The Cardinal of Lorraine has left the Court, it is said, for Lorraine. The Emperor's Ambassador had twice audience of the King while at Troyes, although he was not more than a week there, and also twice since he lay at Delvent, a frequency in so short a space somewhat unusual. Sends herewith a complaint of some spoliation alleged to have been committed by some English on a person of Bordeaux. Had replied that he had no commission in such matters, and that they must apply to his Grace or to the ordinary judges. [Five pages. The first and larger part in cipher, undeciphered.]

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May 29. Augsburg. The Bishop of Westminster to Sir William Petre. Sends the effect of the supplication from the Commissioners of the cities against the Interim (missing); also Preface to the Interim, "ut possit estimare leonem ex unguibus;" the rest he will bring with him.

Also copy of the Hungarians' petition for aid (likewise missing). The league between the French and the Bishop of Rome is positively affirmed, and money deposited on both sides. Bernardine has heard that the French have laid at Venice 700,000 crowns, and the Bishop at Lyons 350,000.

"They name this league defensive, but the Imperials name it offensive." He has also heard of the angry expressions in regard to the Bishop of Rome made use of by the Emperor to the Legate, moving for the restitution of Piacenza. Duke Maurice left this two days ago, as did the Landgrave's wife, having permission to visit her husband.

The insurrection in Poland said to be at an end, all parties having submitted to the King, from whom an Ambassador to the Emperor is on his way. Mount has seen the request of the Austrians to the States for aid: pretended, like that of the Hungarians and the King of the Romans, to be for raising an army and defences against the Turk. [Two pages.]

Eod. die. Copy of preface to the Interim referred to in the preceding letter, [Eight pages.] Entirely different from that printed in the Constitutiones Imperiales of Melchior Goldast.

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June 5. Augsburg. Same and Sir Philip Hoby to the Lord Protector and the Council. Sir Philip Hoby arrived on the 1st, and an audience for him and the Bishop had been appointed for to-day, but the Emperor having been seized with a flux over night, it will probably be deferred till to-morrow.

Sends copy of letter from Melancthon to Carolowicius (missing), and of the Emperor's replication to the States' answer concerning his demand for the Low Countries to be in defence of the Empire (likewise missing).

The Bishop having his Majesty's commands to return and to arrange with Sir P. Hoby, will do all in his power to accomplish the same. [One page. Printed nearly entire by Tytler, Vol. i., p. 99.]

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June 11. Augsburg. Same to same. Had audience of the Emperor on Wednesday, when the Bishop took leave and Hoby presented his credentials. The Emperor strongly professed his desire for a continuance of amity, and referred the Bishop to Granvelle on the question of the mutual treaty of wools.

Both next day saw Granvelle, of the interview with whom they give full details. Granvelle said the Emperor had not yet heard from his Commissioners as to the treaty of wools, but he is so well affectioned to the King's Majesty that he will not only ratify it, but all other treaties and leagues.

He farther spoke vehemently against the French and their war in Scotland, and mentioned his defiant reply to the French Ambassador's complaint of the closing the ports against their ships.

The Emperor cannot accede to their request as to Courtpening's band, but Courtpening may have as many men as he likes without any hindrance on part of the Emperor, and the Regent will not fail to help him as she may. This, however, was to remain a secret understanding between Granvelle and the Ambassadors. [Four pages.]

--- July 1. Brussels. Sir Thomas Smith to Mr. Cecil, Master of the Requests to the Lord Protector's Grace. They arrived here on Friday night. The Queen having gone a hunting to Binche, could not speak with her, but hopes they shall on Tuesday or Wednesday.

The Bishop of Westminster arrived shortly before them, and will be in England soon. All is quiet here, without any suspicion of war. The Emperor said to be still sacking in Germany, and to be very lusty. Marvels that none knew of the burning of Arde till they told it.

Longs to hear of the Bishop of Winchester's summons, and how he demeaned himself therein. Begs Cecil to remember him when the answer of the park cometh. [One page. Printed by Tytler, with the exception of one paragraph, Vol. i., p. 107.]

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July 8. Brussels. Same, Sir Edward Carne, and Sir Thomas Chamberlain to the Lord Protector. The Lady Regent arrived here from Binche yesterday. Had audience of her this afternoon. She is sensible of his Majesty's desire of amity with the Emperor, which is reciprocated. It may be that there was no evil meaning in the thing, but mistaken; and though what was done is thought in England to have been done justly, the contrary is thought here. Shall appoint parties to debate with them, and give them reason.

The Duke of Arschot is to be married to the Princess Dowager of Orange, daughter to the Duke of Lorraine, this week. The Florentines are informed by letters from Lyons that the French there boast that their galleys had taken Rye and Dover, and even entered the Thames and besieged London; but that many of them were slain and the rest repulsed.

The Spaniards had been expelled from Sienna by aid of the Prince de Saxe, who arrived with 19 galleys at Port Orbitello, beside Port Hercules. Andrew Doria, with 20 galleys, has sailed from Genoa against him. [Two pages.]

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July 19. Brussels. Sir Thomas Smith to Sir William Paget, Comptroller of the Household. Cannot learn what they mean by keeping them here longer, as at every meeting all seems concluded. Imparts to him at great length his views as to the necessity for imposing restrictions in order to preserve the trade of the English merchants.

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Aug. 11. Venice. Balthasar Alterius to the Lord Protector. Incloses intelligence from the Roman Court (missing). The French King will come to Turin on the 15th inst., with very few horsemen, merely to look at the place, and then will return.

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Aug. 16. Antwerp. William Dansell to Sir Francis Fleming, Lieutenant of the King's Majesty's Ordnance, or to Mr. A. Anthony, Clerk of the same at the Tower. Mentioning his having shipped certain stores (therein enumerated) under this mark [symbol], which he will please to receive for his Majesty's use, and give an acknowledgment therefor. Can supply his Majesty with a considerable quantity of saltpetre at seven crowns and a half, or very near thereabout. [One page.]

Aug. 26. Venice. Balthasar Alterius to the Lord Protector. Incloses intelligence from the Roman Court (missing). The King of France is still at Turin, but it is said will depart shortly, not without some small diminution of his fame, his advent having been compared to the mountain in labour.

Ferdinand Gonzaga lately visited him and soon left. Thinks the King will remain longer to await the arrival of the Prince of Spain in Italy, that he may receive a reply from them, whom he has sought by many promises to accede to his purpose. This is the more likely, if it be that the Duke of Vendome is shortly expected at Mantua, and thereafter at Venice. [One page.].

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Sept. 14. Konigsberg. Albert, Marquis of Brandenburg, to King Edward VI. In favour of Wolhard Count Mansfeldt, who desires to enter into his Majesty's service. [Latin. Broadside.]

--- Sept. 16. Louvain. Sir Philip Hoby to the Lord Admiral. Had not written since his arrival here, as his Lordship would know what was going on by his letters to the Lord Protector. Narrates the Emperor's late proceedings in the matter of the Interim, and his being repulsed at the attack on Constance, in which Don Alonzo Vives was slain.

The Emperor left on the 13th for Ulm, where he remained only five (sic) days; is now here, and after 10 or 12 days it is thought will go to the Low Countries. The Bishop of Rome, nothing satisfied with the Emperor's proceedings in these matters of religion, refuses to ratify them.

The French King is at Turin, and his abode there is regarded with suspicion by this Court. Conspiracy to slay Don Fernando (Gonzaga) discovered. [Two pages and a half. Printed by Tytler, Vol. i., p. 125.]

--- Nov. 1. London. Sir John Masone to the Lord Protector. Details his unsatisfactory interview with the French Ambassador in regard to some French prisoners sent from Canterbury to London, at the escape of whom the Ambassador had connived. [Two pages and a half.]

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Dec. 13. Miraw. The Lord Protector to Dr. Wotton. Details a conference between his Grace and the French Ambassador, wherein the Protector asserted the King's right to the supremacy of Scotland, and offered to prove it by the production of national records and documents, showing the homages and services done by the Kings of Scotland, under their own seals and those of the prelates and cities of that kingdom, &c.

Sends copy of a compilation of these authorities, and copies of some of the documents, desiring Dr. Wotton to submit them to the French King and his Council. [Three pages and a half; much injured by damp. Draft, autograph of Secretary Petre.] A clean copy of the preceding, taken from the Scotch papers. [Three pages.]

#primary sources #King Edward VI of England #Edward VI Of England #Edward VI #House of Tudor #Tudor dynasty #Edward Tudor #King of England #Tudors #Tudor #The Tudors #1548

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lcvcntc · 5 years ago

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APPLY FOR

TEKLA GLÜCKSBURG, NÉE CROŸ

tekla glücksburg has never faltered on her way to greatness. anyone with her determination, beauty, and wits would have an easy time accomplishing their dreams --- but not everyone has all three. indeed, it takes quite a lot from a person to go from being an irrelevant cousin to being an adored crown princess.

❝ fair speech may hide a foul heart ❞

A WANTED CONNECTION FOR @highsocietyhq !

TEKLA WAS BORN in hungary as tekla croÿ --- the only child of the king’s third born son. there was absolutely nothing significant about her. the public’s interest in her disappeared mere three days after her birth. why would they write about the spare number six when the crown prince’s wife had just given birth to a baby princess ? tekla and her cousin fanni ended up sharing every single magazine spread from then on: christening, first day of school, graduation... the two girls were pitted against each other from the very beginning. the media had made fanni into their sweetheart, which lead to tekla suffering at their hand.

SHE HAD TO learn the tricks of the trade very early on in order to survive the media. how to appear likable, how to seem interesting, how to seem approachable but dignified. it wasn’t an easy task for a teenagers but tekla had enough determination to pull it off.

TO SAY she was jealous of the treatment her cousins received, would have been an understatement. the feeling didn’t turn into resentment --- no, she still loved her cousins dearly ! as an only child, they were the closest thing she had to siblings. but her jealousy fueled her ambition. she dreamed big and she was relentless. she was determined to show how much someone as unimportant as her could accomplish.

HER WORK took her to numerous seminars around the globe. tekla started out as an understudy to a human rights activist who worked with the un. it was important work and she liked getting her hands dirty --- it made her feel like the work was worth something and she was genuinely making a change. a few months after joining a new task force, she met someone, the one.

GETTING MARRIED at the age of 26 had never been the plan but it made sense. she loved him, he inspired her, and, most importantly, he was important and he would make her even more important. the future crown prince of denmark was a dashing young man who any girl would have married without a second thought.

THE ROYAL WEDDING was the big event of 2015, and it put tekla on the map for good. suddenly europe knew of ‘that one hungarian princess’, suddenly people were interested in her opinions, suddenly she had people to do her bidding. ever since her wedding, tekla has been a force to be reckoned with --- she always has a dozen irons in the fire. she is showing no signs of slowing down.

STATS

name: tekla glücksburg, née croÿ fc: martha hunt dob: 25th of august, 1989 age: 31 title: crown princess of denmark, née princess of hungary marital status: married husband: thore glücksburg, the crown prince of denmark cousins: @lcvcntc, @fannicroy, @olimpiacdb in-laws: @viggc, @hvnnc

PLEASE CONTACT @lcvcntc BEFORE APPLYING !

( cpsd credit X )

#martha hunt fc #royal rp #royalty rp #pairs rp #hshqadopt #listen guys.... we had the longest brainstorming session for her

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whatevenismyaestheticidk · 5 years ago

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Things I’ve heard high schoolers say pt 2

Person 1: But air doesn’t splash Person 2: How do we know that, Im splashing the air right now.

Person: Prove me wrong. Prove fish can’t see air.

Person: I think you underestimate just how poor I am.

Person: I just invented a new thing. No Romo. Like no homo but with romance cause I’m lonely. Get it?

Person: So yah I burned my hair cooking ramen.

Person: Well I figured he wasn’t an adopted iguana.

Person: Say it. You know god is watching.

Person 1 upon heading the news of George Bush’s death: Wait he’s still alive? Person 2: No he’s dead that’s the point.

Person: I got it. *five second pause* no I don’t got it.

Person 1: My name is (name), but you can call me yours. Person 2: Okay nice to meet you yours.

Person: Don’t drink it all fool.

Person: Bruh you could literally turn in a gay fanfic and he’d give it an A.

Person: Bruh, what is this triangular accusation?

Person 1:It’s call physics. Person 2: Yah but I don’t take Physics hence they should not apply to me.

Person 1: Discreet. Person 2: No discr-yeet *dabs*

Person 1: Be impressed with my ability to bull shit. Person 2: I mean, it’s gotten you this far.

Person: Why do I feel like finals are lowkey Russian roulette? Like okay I made it through most of them but I still have a few pulls of the trigger to go and one of them might get me.

Person 1: Murder. Just do it. Person 2: I didn’t know that nike was sponsoring murder.

Person: How do mermaids reproduce if they’re just like conjoined legs?

Person 1: Frozen Yogurt Person 2: Fro yo Person 1: Frozen YOgUrt Person 2: Fro Yo Person 1: FROZEN YOGURT

Person: All I have to do to commit suicide is jump from my parents expectations to my grades.

Person 1: I mean yah I cheated on that test. Person 2: Man your love life it DOOMED!

Person: I was seeing if I was tripophobic by repeatedly stabbing my finger with my pen.

Person: You do know that crickets exist during the day right?

Person 1: Hey (person 2), we’re friends right? Person 2: ….. What do you want. Person 1: You know, that sandwich looks real good. *person 2 hand them the sandwich* OMIGOD THANK YOU SO MUCH I LOVE YOU!

Person: Omigod (person’s name) is going through puberty!

Person: If you pulled my ear I would have ripped out your nostril.”

Person 1: She’s attacking me! Person 2: No, he’s beating a woman, that’s not polite.

Person 1: I know many things! Person 2: like what? Person 1: ..... Person 2: my point.

Person: My shoes will be sparkly red stilettos. Fight me Dorothy.

Person: umm hello Christmas miracle even though I’m not Christian. Come at me 15 years from now!

Person 1: you’d make a really good baldie Person 2: yah you have a really rest head shape

Person: you know teletubbies? Yah that but compressed.

Person 1: I mean how will you become American? Person 2: paint me white, I’ll get a passport.

Person 1: I’m so funny. Person 3: it’s hard not to be when your life is a joke.

Person 1: So I’ve decided that my new career choice is to make school specific memes Person 2: That's Plan A? Yeash... at least Plan B lands you some cash

Person: I’m so small and bitter I’m like a human expresso

Person: You know what I’d name a baby kangaroo if I had one? David Jowie.

Person: I’m just saying that the orange red glitter crayon is you.

Person: I feel like a 1940’s schoolgirl who goes to an all girl finishing school where embroidery is a required class.

Person: I started high school with straight A’s, now I’m not even straight.

Person: Yeah, I’d swear by comic sans.

Person: (Persons name)stop being depressy and you’ll be more sucessy

Person: You can totally be insecure and self absorbed at the same time.

Person 1: Are you kids okay? Person 2: Besides crippling depression yeah.

Person: I don’t know it’s just giving me pig vibes.

Person: What drugs where the animators for “Pink Elephants on Parade” on?

Person: long story short I make like a semi hot guy.

Person: If I where pregnant id just be like 'you put this thing inside of me, you're helping me until it's out.'

Person: These girls asked me what type of guys I like and being the simple gay I am, I completely blanked

Person 1: why do you read on your phone if you get carsick at 20 minutes? Person 2:Because it works for the first 19 minutes.

Person: Three Indians, a Thai, a Colombian, and an American walk into a bar. Just kidding they aren't old enough to drink. Three Indians, a Thai, a Colombian, and an American walk into a school cafeteria...

Person: I can't do alcohol cause I'm not of age but I can do drugs because they're illegal for everyone.

Person 1: you can't have a breakdown, it's the third day of school. Person 2:... so?

*Group of kids singing Bohemian Rhapsody in twelve different keys* Person: For gods sake choose a key!

Person: For gods sake that was complicated. You didn't need to send out a survey to see which episode of which season of which show to watch.

Person: Honestly I'd chose stab over dab any day.

Person 1: She said she'd throw me out of the window. Person 2: She never did. Person 1: She never did.

Person: What language is this? *pause* Oh wait it's English.

Person 1: I mean it's pretty hit or miss. Person 2 from across the courtyard: I guess they never miss, huh?

Person: Chu-chu bitch. I’m a train.

Person after loosing game of kahoots: I’m going to ka-shoot myself.

Person: So basically I need to learn Hungarian for a song.

Person: No one screams their sneeze, its not human

Person: If I where a mosquito I would bite you and you’d get malaria and die.

Person: That tide pod aesthetic.

Person: No I loved Barney, Barney was my bo.

Person: If I where my own boyfriend I’d dump me.

Person: It's already a really good song but then it's dubstep so it's extra good.

Person: No one is EVER to old for coolmathgames.com

Person 1: Why are you using a poon? Person 2:….. Person 1: WHY ARE YOU USING A POON?!

Person 1: I’ve been blonde for 16 years. Person 2: So what? I’ve been brown for 16 years and you don’t see me coloring myself white!

Person: Yes. Scrape the sweat off my hand.

Person: No one cares about a square cube of water.

Person: We’re melanin intoxicated.

Person: Well my life may be a mess, but at least I’m not doing drugs. Yet.

Person: Negative 13 out of 10, do not recommend.

Person: Yah that’s gunna have to be a no from me.

Person: Fool me once......fool me twice.......fool me as many times as you want, my first name is dumbass.

Person 1: Ya know, I think the Americans have the order of dates right JUST BECAUSE you can do 4/20/2019. Person 2: Okay but they’re still wrong though.

Person with AirPods: And where are YOUR AirPods? Thats what I thought you broke bitches.

Person: Salem witch trials bitches.

Person: La Croix, the AirPods of the soda world.

Person: Who needs a thermometer when you have… your hands!?

Person 1: It’s time to bring back SEXY MASQUERADE BALLS Person 2: It really is. I need an excuse to wear an incredibly uncomfortable dress that's so big I can't even walk through doorways. Person 1: And to wear a swan inspired mask that doesn’t cover enough of my face to deem myself totally anonymous enough to be half as bold and daring as i plan on acting that night but everyone else is on board we’ll all just forget about it the next day. Person 2: That's to specific for you to have made up on the spot, you've thought about this.

Person: It was lady Macbeth that drugged and made the guards drunk, without her Macbeth would just be like “I guess I’ll stab him???” Person: It’s like playing where’s Waldo but the page is India and I’m Waldo.3Person: Why are there so many frowny faces everywhere?

Person: This group chat is weird. It's either homework, deep philosophical conversations, or memes, there's no in between.

Person 1: Honestly, where DID it come from Person 2: The endless abyss that is the internet.

Person: Are you really blaming our generational depression on Jake Paul?

Person 1: Oh. My. God. Guys. Keep your carbon dioxide away from my computer. Person 2: But sharing is caring. Person 1: But my computer doesn’t need this kinda of negativity in its life right now.

Person: Sweetie, if you think I’m going to stop wearing my favorite dress just because you kissed me in it, you are dead wrong.

Person with a metal straw: I don't drink broke.

Person: My whole life has become that sock on the floor. It's just there. When did life screw us over and then just ex? I’m just gonna write a book, and the last sentence will be life screwed them over and then exed. A story of the main character who gets screwed over, so I can get that 'it be like that sometimes' reaction.

Person in group chat: Positivity- I will make you feel better about being an idiot. Self Doubt- I will highlight all of your mistakes and set low standards for you so you'll never be disappointed. Me to Self Doubt- I'm listening...

Person 1: Sadly the disappointment never goes away... Person 2: Man we're a sad lot this time of year.

Person 1:It’s almost my favorite time of the year Person 2:Ahh yes. Singles awareness day, also known as chocolate sales at Walgreens eve, also known as... Valentine's Day. Person 1:... Oh... I meant rainy season.

Person: Being antivax is like swimming in shark infested waters because you're afraid the bridge could break lmao.

Person: I learned how eat a kumquat this weekend.

Person: It’s so sticky. It’s like clear cheese.

Person: Hamburger helper? More like hamburger help me pass this class.

Person 1: So I slipped on a grape… Person 2: You got K.O.’ed by a grape (person’s name), how does it feel.

Person 1: Look at me, I’m fine. Person 2: Well how many drugs did you take. Person 1: Several.

Person 1: Did you just say it’s ALMOST FEBRUARY? Person 2: Yes, it’s January 72nd.

Person: I knew your comedic standards where low, but poop jokes? Really?

Person: What? So are you insinuating the fact that reliablest isn't a word?

Person 1: [bitter old man voice] back in my day, tik tok was a kesha song. Person 2: Back in my day we had wires attached to our AirPods.

Person: There's a reason rainbows aren't straight. Just saying.

Person reading sheet music and seeing mf crescendo: I forgot that mezzo forte was a thing for a second so I thought it said mother fucker as a crescendo but mood

Person: He looks like a fine piece of toasted white bread.

Person: If life hasn't given me a fist bump by now, why should I give life one?

Person: we all died in 2012 this is hell.

Person 1: Who wants a pamphlet on condoms? Person 2: Why do you have this? Do you collect them? Person 1: Yah it’s my hobby. I have this one, one on HIV and one on teenage pregnancy.

Person: We live a society where reading about assassins and gory details is a hobby.

Person: Stop breathing so loudly on my thumb!

Person 1: I’m the comic relief. Person 2: For what? Person 1: Myself.

Person1: Who’s your valentine this year? Person 2: Me, myself and I. Person 1: Wow three valentines, you really can’t keep them away can you?

Person: Why do women gotta get their period, why not men. I wish I was born a seahorse.

Person 1: No we can’t all fit, her car is smol. Like you. Person 2: Says you miss 5 foot nothing lmao. Person 1: Hey we’re the same hight so says you miss 5 foot nothing.

Person: No, that’s cheating no emotionally disabling people.

Person 1: Why is it that we’re talking about someone burning eggs on two different group chats. Person 2: Hey I didn’t burn them. Person 3: Cause why not?

Person 1: That’s not how an Australian accent works. Person 2: This is why I’m not Australian, I don’t have the koala-fications.

Person 1: I’m Indian, numbers run through my blood. Person 2: That’s like saying I’m going to marry my cousin just because I’m white.

Person: So I ate veggies and hummus for lunch but then I counterbalanced it by eating a spoon full of straight Nutella.

Person: Seagulls, California Pigeons, what’s the difference?

Person 1: I humbly apologize and request your forgiveness. Person 2: I humbly decline your request for forgiveness.

Person: I think I’m permanently stuck somewhere between “If you mess with me I’ll fight” and “If you mess with me I’ll cry.”

Person 1: It was implied! Person 2: What’s implied is your inability to accept that fact that I’m right!

Person 1: I got lazy because I was eating Pringles. Person 2: She values Pringles more than me.

Person: Yo, you be the crazy ex girls they be talking about in memes.

Person: I swear (persons name) if I hooked up with squidward in your dream your subconscious and I need to have a little talk.

Person: You get to die, and you get to die! Everybody gets to die!

Person: How do you just add a child?

Person 1: Look at this ink based pencil. Person 2: A pen?  Person 1: This egg is all broken. Person 2: It’s like you then, you both broke under the pressure.

Lakshmi: Don’t force your opinion, voice it.

Person 1: If I where a fruit, which one would I be? Person 2: Sushi. Person 1:… Sushi isn’t a fruit.

Person: I mean it’s not straight up “Yo come here I’m gunna kill you.”

Person: Bye gays, bye (other girls name).

Person 1: No (person B) stop. Just shut up. You’re making me loose brain cells. Person 2: But… Person 1: No. Just no.

Person: Stop. That is non-consensual pizza eating.

Person 1: Cheese is not a vegetable! Person 2: Well it’s not a meat either! Person 3: Guys… It’s dairy.

Person: Idiots have priority over just regular dumb people

Person: God melted the polar ice caps just to make it rain for Noah then refroze them. I don’t know (kids name) I’m not god!

Person: You and I will go out, and leave them to their raw fish rolled in sea salad.

Person: Does anyone else get really energized when they change their room? Just me? Okay.

Person: I hope you know I will diss you guys to the end of the earth.

Person: Bruh talk to (person’s name) I don’t know sh… *notices teacher looking at her*…niahhh.

Person 1: The thing is, I don’t want to be 80 that’s rough. Person 2: Then just die at 50.

Person: You’d be scrambled eggs with hair.

Person: Seeing you two fighting, it’s like seeing a piece of light fighting a black hole.

Teacher: What can you tell me about probability? Student 1: I hate it. Student 2: Dont you mean you? Student 1: Yes both.

Person: My brain has the dumb I’m sorry

Person 1: If my first word was no, I’m assuming that’s foreshadowing for them my family disowns me after I renounce religion and systemic abuse. Person 2: Or…. You just need to make sure your last word is yes. Person 1: Yes to what though? Person 2: ‘Are you dying?’ Yes.’ Pessimism, just your style. Person 1: That’s true.

Person: My parents don’t message me, they’re the type of people who CALL. Where did I get my social anxiety from??

Person: Well guys it's been great knowing you I’m just going to drown now.

Person: I figured out a new diet regime, it’s called sleeping until noon and just not eating breakfast.

Person: The f on my birth certificate was the doctor paying their respects.

Person: Chocolates with raspberry filling are the sole reason I’m still alive.

Person 1: Isn’t Latin a dead language? Person 2: You’re a dead language!

Person: Hydrate before you diedrate.

Person 1: you have a son named Spider-Man? Person 2: what noooo! Person 3: well don’t expose her!

Person: That awkward moment when you just really don’t care about people.

Person 1: (Person 2) and I will be over here with my virgin margarita and her water. Person 2: Hey! I want apple juice! Person 3: Why are you not drinking (Person 1)? Person 2: Because she’s to single, and also she’d strip. Person 1: Woahh! How dare you assume that I’m not drinking because I’m to single?

Person 1: Ya know, I think I’m going to have to jazz hands my way through hell. Person 2: All of us will.

Person: Brown town children, y’all find someone in India?

Person 1: Wow you have the best backup singers. Person 2: I only hire the best, at least 5 stars in yelp. Person 1: Well good because that’s the sound they’re making.

Person: The cold kills everything, it’s like my heart.

Person 1: Remember the rolls I brought to school last year that I used to give you? The ones with paneer and the really good spices? Person 2: Yah? Person 1: This is not at all the same thing.

Person 1: What’s stevia? Person 2: It’s like sugar but no.

Person 1: Yeetus Skelettus. Person 2: Fetus Deletes? Honey, that’s called abortion.

Person: Anything for you. That’s what you said. Anything for you. But when I ask for just one bite of your pasta? No!

Person 1: I've written 1,300 words and don’t have a thesis statement or topic question Person 2: Yeah, you need to figure that out.

Person 1: you know I had a dream that you where in a romantic relationship with a toaster. Person 2: wasn’t that your relationship with (ex’s name)? Person 1: you’d have more chemistry with a toaster.

Person: Can people read colors? Cause I am ooo.

Person: It’s like hands but medusa

Person: You look like a cardboard jellyfish that’s brown

Person 1: Two of us like boys. Person 2: We all like boys. Person 1: Two of us like ONLY boys.

Person: you’re like a reverse plant. You convert oxygen into carbon dioxide.

Person: Shhhhh. I’m not in physics, let me be dumb in peace.

Person: Why are you laying down like some greek god, get up you brown child.

Person 1: Do all of you just think you’re going to be single? Person 2: I already am why not keep the streak going to get a high score?

Person: and now cracks of light are coming out from around the sides like some sort of computer Jesus!

People 1 and 2: Rock Paper Scissors Person 3: shoot me please.

Person 1: not since 9/11 you can’t. Person 2: dang. You just tossed your whole country just to prove a point. I’ve never been so proud.

Person 1: what is an angle of depression? Person 2: it’s my life. Person 1: no it’s you because it’s not straight.

Person: Boom. Lesbians.

Person 1: Well what if two rocks just washed up at the same time and humans. Person 2: Evolution.

Person: Watermelon isn’t good anymore, I swear its just water with food coloring.

Person: You being dumb makes me want to correct you, sos too being dumb cause I’m on vocal rest.

Person: well (persons name) who have you a mouth?

Person: Teachers that grade late work deserve all the love and cookies and cake in the world.

Person 1: honestly I just want to die right now. Person 2: same. Literally same.

Person: I just feel like a single molecule lost in space.

Person: who’s gunna stop me? God? Damn him to hell.

Person: the line is not actually straight it’s like (students name)

Person 1: It’s your favorite sleep deprived gay. Person 2: But I’m my favorite sleep deprived gay. Self love. Person 1: We Stan.

Person 1: Why do you have a tool? Person 2: Because my hair is moist.

Person: eating lead was an otherworldly experience

Person 1: I have everything stolen from me 2: at least you have the tiniest bit of dignity left 3: what dignity? 1: exactly

Person 1:( holding up katsup) does this go on salad?

Person:I’m turning red! Me! A brown girl!

Person: I’m not trying argue that we should date, I’m just saying.

Person 1: what’s your biggest turn on? Person2 : a light switch Person 2: or then leaving.

Person 1: what is the most attractive retire on someone Person 2: my own face

Person: you’d be that one bar do white chocolate that just sits in the feidge because no one wants it

Person: that’s like saying I’d rather see your shirt than your face.

Person: why would I shut up when I can shut (kids name) down

Person: Subtle. Gay. Vibes. I’m telling you.

Person: just watch me write my ee on all the reasons why nick caraway is gay. Just watch me.

Person: Why are you stereotyping. What if the body doesn’t want trucks, what if he wants to be a fairy.

Person: being ace is basically just eww no but like forever.

Person: Stop trying to science your way out of being wrong.

Person: even if you did ask me out I’d still say no so then you’d even be rejected by a trash can

Person 1: you can’t read cheese color. Person 2: yellow?

Person 1: Think about it like you’re brown Person 2: She is brown Person 1: Then act like it

Person: You’re not an ugly frog, you’re a beautiful human being. Person: I am. Very very dumb. And also. Bisexual.

Person: I was thinking of something smart but then I forgot what it was.

Person: I want to skip the crush phase and just make out with someone.

Person 1: The only way to get into the Holland family is to marry in through Paddy. Person 2: (Person 1’s name) this isn’t the royal family.

Person: Omigod you looked like the human version of squid ward.

Person: I want to be smart. Where can I learn smart stuff?

Person: But plant the seed and smoke the weed and chop the cane.

Peeeson 1: that is the definition of meter? Person 2: about 3 feet. Person 1: okay thanks America

Person 1: who’s Tom Holland? Person 2: Spider-Man you uncultured swine!!

Person: I am not a children

Person: Ohh dang yeah forgot chickens existed for a while

Person: Hey! Don’t narrate my water!

Person: I don’t read water.

Person: Think of it as a relationship. If you and your ex break up they are salty but you profit because you wanted to end it but if you end it weak, then y’all will argue back and forth and get nowhere with ending it while still exchanging insults.

Person: You know those really sexual mattress adverts?

Person: Oh please, you have the sexual appeal of an easy bake oven.

Person 1: weed is a gate way drug Person 2: YOURE A GATEWAY DRUG!

Person: (first, middle, last name), I love you to the end of the earth. But you are a daft child.

Person 1: She’s like that type of girl. She’s the long paragraph white girl. Person 2: Well that’s a niche if I’ve even seen one.

Person 1: swing you two fight is like watching two ants fight. Person 2: you friking piece of bacteria!

Person: I’m just an intellectual.

Person: I will murder your face off.

Person: that’s like a kilometer tall.

Person: It’s weird when I pet you horizontally.

Person: to be honest I thought those were rocks in a jar for the longest time. Turns out they weren’t.

Person: does she have a brother or gay tendencies

Person: I’m going to slap your hand like it’s a fricking spider.

Person: I like your face better blurry.

Person: every night at about midnight someone starts googling astrology

Person: I will kick you. I will murder your soul.

Person 1: I’m just going to marry a millionaire. Person 2: Where are you gunna finds a millionaire in this economy?

Person: Welcome to my tea party, there isn’t any tea to drink, but we have a lot of it to spill.

Person: Yah, it was something about sex or something.

Person: You’re all uncultured swines.

Person: I’m about as straight as a sine curve.

Person 1: They’re not Oreo’s you dumb head Person 2: I know that dumber head. Person 3 :Shut up dumbest heads

Person: As an ex foetus i can say with authority that if my mother had aborted me i wouldn't have known nor would i have given a fuck

Person: I’ve just accepted I’m going to fail this test. I’ve gone through the 5 stages of grief already.

Person: Yes I’m blind that’s why I need glasses fool.

Person: what the fork do you want you little son of a biscuit.

Person: Anyway now I’m taking Tylenol PM and I’m going to actually sleep tonight that’ll be fun.

Person: I need all the hoodies. ALL OF THEM.

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