#(Dad she's being silly pls help her)

[rensblade]

𝐒𝐎𝐍𝐆𝐁𝐈𝐑𝐃.

⟢ warnings/notes: husband! jing yuan x gender neutral! reader. toothrotting fluff, cute domestic banter tbh. husband yuan nation, please rise. not proofread, we die like tingyun. might be ooc. pls lmk if i got any of the hsr terminology wrong.. appreciate any type of feedback & please please pleaseee send me reqs if u have any ✩

“beloved, am i really that bad of a general?”

the all too familiar baritone of your husband’s voice fills in your ears, as you raise your gaze from the distance, only to watch him sulk from where he was sat upon the seat of divine foresight.

to anyone that squints, would be graced upon a phenomenon all too odd— jing yuan, one of seven arbiter generals, pouting.

“and what.. exactly makes you think so, ‘yuan?” you already knew the answer, but you still entertained the fact he was pouting, almost comically the same way yanqing does, when you deny him from making impulsive sword purchases.. or the same way mimi, your household lion, scrunches up her face and paws at your clothes when you tell her that she won't get any more snacks for the night.

said man sits up from where he's at, and abruptly makes his way down to where you're seated— at his desk. sorting through some of the things unattended earlier during his earlier escapade to fyxestroll garden.

“well.. you know.” he deadpans, staring down at you. you have to keep in a giggle, finding the way he waited so patiently for you to finish with the work at your side, almost akin to your precious lion who does the same.

you heave a sigh, but in an amused way, as you stack the last documents into a neat pile and turn in your chair, and upon being graced with your attention; your lover nearly falls dramatically into your arms.

“i can't help but think i should just hand over my resignation early. you know what, fu xuan probably saw this coming,” he fake-wails, as you caress his hair, cooing at the man who was currently at your feet.

eventually, he relents, when you tug a little hard on his fluffy white mane. “darling.. is this about cirrus?” the mere mention of the heliobus makes jing yuan glower, and you practically have to bite back your laughter at the expression, opting to clear your throat instead.

he stays silent for a second, then scrunches his face. “..absolutely not,” he retaliates in a serious tone. then, he slumps forward again, almost nuzzling into your lap as he tries to hypothesize. “it's just. i need some constructive criticism, before i actually hand over my position to someone else, you know,” he reasons, but you know better.

“right, why of course.” you humor him a little bit longer. pushing the general’s buttons has always been your favorite past time activity.

he pulls away, getting on his feet before he gathers your hands into his and gives you a solemn look. “you get me, my love. this is why we're married.”

that makes you crack a smile. jing yuan only raises a brow, but returns the smile nevertheless, a little hesitant. “yuan, i love you, but. you mean solid constructive criticism like.. i don't know, maybe it's about time you retired and took a big fat cat nap?” you suggest with a snort, and jing yuan simply huffs. (yeah, mimi definitely got the attitude from her dad).

you shake your head, dragging him to sit next to you as you elaborated. “in all seriousness.. you're not a bad general. not a bad mentor, father or husband, jing yuan. don't let that silly heliobi’s words get to your head.” the tall man, lets you cup his face, squishing his cheeks as you pepper kisses across them, as if to prove your point.

he simply gathers your form up into his arms, holding you tightly and you can't help but relax into the warmth he emits. he's truly a big cat. “you know, i’m starting to think this must be how birds that nest in your hair must feel.” you point out with a false-huff, after a minute of silence.

jing yuan chuckles at that, purposely tugging you by the waist; flush closer against his torso as he nuzzles into you— pale locks of his hair cloud your vision. “why, of course. a wise, little sparrow, you are.” he snuggles against you, golden eyes softening as they examine your reactions. “in fact, my favorite.” the baritone of his words send a pleasant wave of warmth through your body, you can feel him smile against your skin as he litters little kisses here and there.

to be fair, if you were held prisoner in his gentle yet steady hold forever, you were more than willing to be reduced to a mere bird, for eternity. okay, and maybe you would miss making snarky rebuttals at the general, but that's about it.

as you're resting yourself against him, a thought crosses your mind, and you'd bask in the silent affection but your loud thoughts cut you short. “and for the record, you still should've let me kick cirrus’s butt.” as expected, a hearty laugh booms from the man’s chest, the vibrations making your body tingle.

“i love you.” he says, practically purring, as the gigantic man nuzzles even further into the crevice of your neck, pressing yet another kiss to the spot he loves. his hair tickles your neck, but you love the familiarity of it all.

what a heavenly life you live, as the general’s personal songbird.

rensblade, 2023. please do not steal my writings or headers, i put a lot of effort into this. reblogs & comments are appreciated! pls send me asks/reqs, i write for most genshin or hsr or jjk characters as of now. thank u once again <3

[leqonsluv3r]

girl!dad leon kennedy

—husband!leon kennedy being the best absolute girl dad out there, a headcanon list

loosely based off of this oneshot and this headcanon list <3

masterlist taglist

an: happy father’s day yall! i originally wasn’t going to post this for father’s day and post a request instead but this has been sitting in my drafts since i wrote that pregnancy request with leon. so i figured in honor of father’s day, here’s leon being an amazing girl dad or what i think he would be like as a girl dad. anyways, ill post a request this upcoming week. i love you all, pls reblog and like. you know the drill.

girl!dad leon who is infatuated with his daughter from the moment she’s born. he thinks that she’s the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen besides his wife, of course.

girl!dad leon who buys his daughter only everything and anything that her little heart desires. doesn’t matter if she can talk yet, she has him wrapped around his finger. he will spoil the absolute shit out of her until asked not to.

girl!dad leon who watches cartoons with his daughter, holding her in his lap while his wife makes breakfast. doesn’t matter if it’s some stupid cartoon about talking dogs that fight crime, he’s just happy that his little girl is happy.

girl!dad leon that helps his wife pick out little outfits and dresses that somewhat match him, doesn’t matter if it’s corny. he just feels that it’s cute and there is no shame in that.

girl!dad leon who plays dress up with his daughter, dressing up like a fairy princess and dancing around. doesn’t matter if his wife is laughing hysterically and taking a ton of pictures, he’s the happiest when he hears his little girl laugh. her little giggles are proof enough that he’s doing something right with his life.

girl!dad leon who plays dolls with his daughter, making silly high pitched voices that he wasn’t aware he could conjure. his daughter is eating all of it up, every moment spent with her dad is a good one.

girl!dad leon who makes his daughter lunches for her first day at preschool, getting her whatever lunch box she desires and making sure that she’s all dressed up and ready. he packs her apples, some cheese and some fruit snacks, whatever else her little heart desires.

girl!dad leon who gets matching t-shirts with his little girl, one says daddy’s little trouble maker and the other says the trouble makers father. it makes his wife laugh and she takes a hundred pictures of their little girl and him wearing the matching t-shirts.

girl!dad leon who takes his daughter to the park, pushing her in the swings, getting to act so carefree with his daughter for the day. it’s free therapy that he never knew he needed. having his daughter is healing him one day at a time.

girl!dad leon who watches as his baby girl says her first words and watches her crawl, he showers her and praise and love, just like his wife. he hugs his baby girl and hoists her in the air, her little babbles and giggles making him feel like he’s living a dream. he never knew his life would be this good.

girl!dad leon who carry’s her around in a baby bjorn, casually walking around the grocery store with his little girl strapped to his chest. her little eyes looking up at him the entire time and making his heart melt. he’s getting softer by the day he swears and it’s all thanks to a combination of him and his wife’s genes wrapped up in a cute little baby.

girl!dad leon who buys his daughter a different stuffed animal after he comes back from every mission, watching her little face light up and yell, “daddy! daddy!” one of the few words she knows. it makes him glad he survived. his two girls safe under one roof is worth it if he has to see bloodshed and death every once in a while. their safety is more important and precious.

girl!dad leon who watches his daughter stumble around on her little legs to pick flowers in the backyard. every time she picks one, she brings it back to him and he holds it in his hand until he has enough for a small bouquet. he doesn’t have the heart to tell his little girl that they’re just weeds, she’s happy and that’s good enough for him.

girl!dad leon who celebrates his daughters first birthday with her and his wife. throwing her a small party with some of his friends and his wife’s friends, watching as his wife opens presents for their daughter. watching as her daughter gets a smash cake, burying her face in frosting and getting all dirty. normally he would hate the mess, but he’d never thought he’d get here. celebrating one year of having the best little girl ever and a loving wife. he really got lucky.

girl!dad leon who buys his daughter a little necklace that says “daddy’s princess” on it. he knows she’s only a year old and can’t really appreciate it yet, but he just wanted to get something special for his little girl. his baby’s first piece of jewelry (among many more if he has anything to say about it).

girl!dad leon who wakes up on father’s day with the biggest smile on his face. his wife and his little girl in the kitchen, cooking him the biggest breakfast known to man. he’s wearing that matching t-shirt he got all those months ago. he gets some heart shaped pancakes shaped like hearts, a card and a teddy bear that his daughters tiny hands hold out to him, says best daddy ever on the belly of the furry teddy. he feels his eyes water and grabs his tiny baby girl, pressing kisses to her head. does the same to his wife, showing his appreciation for having his little slice of serenity. he finally got his happy ending, one he never thought was possible. and he has his wife and daughter to thank for that.

taglist: @elihii @heartsforvin @argreion @sqiim @adollrable @leonkennedygvrl @laceycoffins @porcelainseashore @squazmine (taglist is linked above if you would like to join!!)

[everythingne]

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ ➛ miss diaz (fa14)

with fernando's new appreciation of tik tok, fans begin to wonder where he's getting the ideas from, until he ends up racing alongside his previously unknown daughter... who is already a driver, and in her twenties.

warnings/notes: fernando my dad fr, this is the silliest little fic i loved making it?? I have never written this man and i regret it hes so silly, quite short and sweet, i might make this a verse? idk. i have too many series' rn, but if people like it ...

faceclaim: none :D!

"Ay, papá, ¡no! [You're gonna get yourself hurt!]"

The Alonso house was never quiet. This was something your mother had come to realize long ago. But now she was concerned. What the hell could you and Fernando be doing that would lead to him getting hurt? Despite your insistence of being well mannered and quiet, your mother knew you could tend to get up to the same level of quirkiness as your father.

It didn't help you were smashing records in Formula 1 Academy, racing alongside women like Lia Block and the Al Qubaisi sisters, all while hiding your identity.

Someone had bashed it into you at twelve you'd only be known as Little Alonso if you continued racing under your fathers name, hence why you had insisted you dropped Alonso and continued with Diaz.

Which you did... after six months of convincing your father.

Who is currently shouting, "I'll be fine, ¡bebita!"

"You have old bones!" Is your remark as your mother gets up from where she's tending to the online store she runs for her business. Sort of like a branch out of her Etsy store. She made really nice custom embroidery on top of her working for a media company that outsourced and trained employees for PR teams.

"I'm not that old!" Fernando's shout makes her laugh into her hand as she steps into the kitchen to see you've got a whole plethora of items out and around you.

"What are you two doing..?" She hums, leaning on the doorframe and watching as both you and Fernando turn to her like deer in headlights.

And then you smile, "Papá wants to make a Tik Tok."

Verónica laughs, watching as her husband attempts to tape his phone to the ceiling fan and she puts her hands up and walks out of the room with a quick sentence over her shoulder, "[I'm not explaining this to Aston Martin!]"

fernandoalonso

liked by missdiaz, astonmartinf1, veronicadiaz, and 683k others...

fernandoalonso: race weekend monaco edition 💚

user1: whos teenage daughter ghost wrote this caption?? how old is ur social media admin nando.

veronicadiaz: mi vida <3

⤷ fernandoalonso: mi corazón <3

⤷ user2: PARENNNTSSS

user3: i love my grid dad fr

missdiaz: youngest rookie on the grid!!

⤷ fernandoalonso: rookie of the year!

⤷ user4: yn and nando interaction. my heart is FULL!!

missdiaz

liked by astonmartinf1, f1academy, fernandoalonso, and 348k others...

missdiaz: monaco pit stop <3

astonmartinf1: thats our favorite academy driver!!

⤷ missdiaz: love u am xx

user1: mother is mothering fr

fernandoalonso: rookie of the year!!

⤷ missdiaz: youngest rookie on the grid!!

⤷ user2: nando become her grid dad pls i beg

user3: shut up shes in monaco.

user4: SO PRETTYYY

You read the headline for a third time, 'F1 Academy driver Y/N Diaz to replace ill Lance Stroll for the Monaco GP.'

There's a happy buzz in the Aston Martin garage, even with Lance being terribly ill this weekend. He'd still shown up in full support of his team, but was too woozy to actually get in the car. Too much of a risk. So, Aston Martin had called on you, and you were genuinely excited to race. So your father escorts you into the garage with a tiny proud smile, and all of Aston Martin knows who you actually are.

But media does not. Neither do some of the other drivers.

Hence how you end up talking with Lando during a press event, and when he gives you a soft smile and edges around asking your age, you have to poke your father's thigh to keep him from commenting on it. Lando has no idea he's blatantly flirting with you in front of your dad, but across from him Lewis is trying not to burst into laughter.

"I feel like I'm missing something." Lando says when the reporter comments on the eyes you, Lewis, and Fernando are giving each other. You look at Fernando and he nods,

"Yeah go for it, hermosa." Fernando taps your knee and you smirk, leaning on your fathers shoulder as you say,

"So my full name is Y/N Diaz Alonso, but I go by Diaz because y'know, my dad's got a pretty good legacy--"

"You're his daughter?!" Lando shouts and the audience starts screaming. Lewis is in practical tears with how hard he's laughing and Fernando's laughing as well. Lando curses, "Shit, man!"

"No hard feelings, man." Fernando reaches over to pats Lando's shoulder, who looks like he'd rather sink into the floor and die than be seen right now. Lewis is literally in tears.

"The fact Nando managed to keep this a secret for so long is unsurprising to me," Lewis says, "I mean, I knew because she was young when I first got to F1 and a lot of the older drivers know--plus Max, I think, because of the Piquets."

"Funnily enough," You giggle into the back of your hand, "Mark Webber's my godfather."

"Really?!" The reporters eyes widen and you nod.

"He's a bad influence, truly. Him and Jenson, oh and Seb, they were teaching me curse words at like four years old." You grin and Fernando laughs, now happily laying his arm across your shoulder to tug you to his side.

"And honestly, she's just like me at her age, so the boys on the track might wanna watch out." Fernando sends a pointed glance to Lando that has you whacking your fathers chest with a giggle.

"I'm more like him in the sense of goofy Renault celebrations Fernando, not like "I knew he'd brake because he has a wife and kids at home" Fernando." You clarify, but a knowing glance from Lewis has you shrugging while your father sits in smug confidence that his daughter will be fine.

And you would be. You were closer to the comments than the celebrations in actuality. Though, you'd never admit that.

[piracytheorist]

I love how even silly short missions manage to have their share of wholesomeness and family connection. It's like family is important in a series called Spy x Family or something.

Anyway, Anya is a kid that gets very attached to certain things - and despite being bold enough to use the knowledge she has due to her telepathy in order to make Loid do what she wants, she's not exactly a spoiled kid. She still sticks to Mr. Chimera, the only toy she had while she was in the orphanage. She doesn't ask for new clothes, or toys, or gadgets, what she asks for is experiences (the castle rescue, adopting Bond in specific after she was emotionally invested in him)... and peanuts, too.

So to her, the penguin plush is not just one toy from her plethora of toys that got ruined. It's a toy that her dad got for her. It's a souvenir of their aquarium adventure, where she helped him locate the penguin he needed to find and even arrest the criminal who wanted to get the secret information about the weapon. It's a reminder of how she took part and helped him in his mission. Just a replacement stuffed penguin won't do. It's not the toy itself, it's the memories connected to it. I mean, of course she's sad a toy of her got destroyed - by the dog she asked to have, no less - but it hurts even more knowing what this toy means to her.

And the show takes Anya's feelings seriously with that. The soft "Little by Little" score plays while Loid fixes the penguin, with Yor looking with anticipation. Bond feels sad and regretful, understanding the consequences of his actions and wanting to make it up to Anya. They're all invested in things getting better.

And once the penguin is ready, though with visible "scars" now, Loid reassures Anya that his new appearance is nothing to be ashamed of.

And the interesting thing? Twilight, Best Spy of Westalis, Master of DisguiseTM... stutters. He does so in Japanese both in the manga and the anime.

Which makes me wonder, considering his background and profession, how big his experience with scars is (and if we're gonna learn more about that, come on give the whump fan some scraps here 👀👀) (pls don't spoil me about the manga if we do, I want the whump but on its own time!) and if reaching into his own personal feelings about scars in order to resonate with Anya hit him just a little more than he expected. Or if he was so serious about it that he didn't know whether he should tell her something so grim. He's here dedicating himself into a deadly dangerous job so that kids like Anya won't have to suffer like he did as a kid, and yet he has to pass on to her something he learned the hard way.

Yeah yeah I'm here putting too much thought and grimness into what was supposed to be a wholesome moment. Hi I'm Nette and you'll be getting a lot of those in the future :)

[pinksturniolo]

Play Date - A Matt Sturniolo One Shot

Matt Sturniolo x Fem Reader

You call me on the telephone, you sound so far away

You tell me to come over, there’s some games you want to play

I’m walking to your house, nobody’s home

Just me and you and you and me alone…

Summary: The one in which Matt has been helping you babysit your 5 year old brother for the past couple years. Everyone in Somerville, MA knew him as the sweetest and caring guy, always helping someone when they needed it. However, you and him never got along, always disagreeing on most things. You and him had nothing in common. Well… maybe one thing.

Content Warnings: smut, angst, small age gap, fingering, oral receiving/giving, degradation, raw penetration, sneaking around, matt being a tough guy.

Based on this song: (pls listen it's so good and the lyrics are what inspired this one shot)

a/n: i'm sorry if the age gap makes anyone uncomfortable, everything depicted in this story is purely consensual <3

Winter 2024

You watched as Matt helped untie your little brother’s shoes and unzip his jacket, the two of them coming back in from playing outside. You had stayed inside on the couch, keeping warm while you worked on your English essay, watching them from the living room window. A storm hit soon after New Year’s leaving Boston in a blanket of fresh white snow.

He sets his shoes and jacket down, leading him to the kitchen to make him a cup of juice. Your brother adored Matt, there was no denying he was a great babysitter. A couple years ago, your mom started working out of town every other weekend, leaving you home alone to take care of your brother since your dad left when you were a little girl. 

Your mom had always been a strict parent, so naturally she didn’t trust you to be by yourself the whole weekend given the fact you were only 16 at the time. So, she asked one of her friend’s sons to help, who happened to be Matt Sturniolo.

Matt was trusted by mostly everyone, and your mom had known his mom since high school, so she had no problem with him being at your house. You, however, were extremely against this idea. You and Matt had never gotten along no matter how much you tried. You had known him since elementary school and from the moment you met, he always had an attitude towards you for some reason. Being that you were so stubborn, you didn’t back down from his sourness, and challenged him every chance you got.

He was a couple years ahead of you in school and always brought up the fact that because he was older, that somehow made him better than you. You refused to acknowledge that, butting heads with him constantly. It didn’t help that some of your friends were his friends and each time you guys were around each other, it was a constant competition. Who was better at bowling, who got first place in Mario Kart, who had the best golf swing. It annoyed your friends to no end.

When you were a sophomore, Matt would come over the weekends your mom worked out of town. He stayed during the majority of the day, taking care of your little brother. This also gave you the freedom to attend many of the extracurricular activities you were involved in. You took pride in being the top of your class and captain of the dance team. Matt endlessly teased you about it, calling you a “try hard” and “nerd”.

The time you did spend at home when Matt was there, you tried to avoid arguing with him around your brother. The three of you often went to the park, or got ice cream, never running out of ways to entertain him. The more time you had spent around Matt, it was hard not to develop a little crush. You would never admit it, but you admired the sweet side of him. He was good at taking care of your brother.

And he subtly started to flirt with you, teasing you over silly things, and checking you out when you weren’t looking. There was no doubt he found you attractive. But you frustrated him to no end, given the fact that you were so stubborn and weren’t afraid to voice your opinion when you disagreed with him on something. Matt liked to be in control, but you did as well. Still, he admired how hard working you were and your sensitive nature.

It didn’t take long before raging teenage hormones created sexual tension between you two. The summer before your junior year, stolen glances and accidental touches fueled the fire that had been growing over the years. One night when you were both alone, watching a movie after your brother had fallen asleep, Matt finally made a move on you. He would usually leave at nighttime, going back home to sleep so he could come back the next day and help you. But he decided to stay and finish the movie with you.

It had been a particularly good Saturday, and you had looked especially pretty that day. He couldn’t stop staring at you and when you asked him what he was looking at, he pressed his lips to yours, igniting a flame in you that you just couldn’t put out.

From that night on, you two snuck around every chance you got, whenever your brother wasn’t around or asleep, almost every weekend up until Matt graduated.

Making out on the couch until his hands found his way into your shorts and under your shirt, eliciting sweet moans from you while he thrust his fingers deep inside you. Pushing him up against the wall in the hallway as you got on your knees and took him into your mouth, his hands tangled in your hair, pulling and grunting until he came down your throat. A couple times, he even spent the night in your bed, using his mouth, hands and cock to make you cum over and over, in every different position.

As much as you both enjoyed the pleasure and excitement, there still was no denying the fact that you two despised each other. Maybe that hate was what fueled the passion between you two in the bedroom, but outside of that, you both never ceased the petty arguing. No matter the deep feelings you had for each other buried inside, it would never go past the sexual relationship you guys had built. Simple as that.

Once Matt graduated and started working in the adult world, he still took the time to keep his baby-sitting duties which you were grateful for, because at this point, you had started throwing yourself more into your schoolwork. You were applying for all the universities you could and taking extra shifts at Star Market you were working at part time. And then it came time for you to graduate, and you went off to college that fall, a few hours from Somerville. You had lost contact with Matt, neither of you taking the time or effort to reach out to each other.

✿

Now it was early January, and you were on winter break. You had come back home to visit and spent some time with your mom before she left on her work trip. Matt came over to help with your brother of course and this was the first time you had seen him since you graduated high school almost a year ago. He was now 20 years old, had let his beard grow out a little, and gotten several tattoos on his left arm.

Was it possible for him to get even more attractive than he already was back then? But you promised yourself you wouldn’t give into your past desires. You had too much to focus on and even though you were on break, you had an important English essay to finish. Besides, Matt had the worst attitude ever as soon as he saw you, making it easier for you to avoid him.

He was currently burning a hole into you with his pointed looks, glaring at you from across the room as your brother sat next to him, playing with his action figures.

You looked up at him from your computer, returning his dirty look. “Can I help you with something, Matthew?” You asked, knowing he hated it whenever you used his full name.

“Aren’t you supposed to be on break? Don’t you do anything for fun?” He said, referring to the fact that you had been typing away on your computer for the last hour.

You rolled your eyes, focusing your attention back on the computer. “Aren’t you supposed to mind your own business?” You responded.

He scoffed, running a hand through his hair. “I don’t really care what you do. I’m just tired of listening to your incessant typing.” He said with annoyance.

You ignored him, continuing to work on your essay while he continued to stare at you. You tried to focus but his piercing gaze distracted you. He sighed loudly and finally you slammed your computer shut, anger bubbling inside you.

“Fine. It’s not like I can focus with you acting like that anyway.” You snap, standing up to walk to the kitchen and get a glass of water.

To your annoyance, he follows you, leaning against the counter as you fill the glass and take a few sips. “Did you miss me, angel?” He says and you almost choke on the water, laughing as you set the glass down. “Don’t be ridiculous.” You reply, turning to face him. His eyes travel up and down your body, no shame in the way he checks you out.

“You still look hot. Brings back memories of when I had you all to myself-“He starts, a mischievous grin appearing on his face. You interrupt him though, grabbing his jaw a little roughly, smushing his lip together to prevent him from continuing whatever dirty thoughts he was going to say.

“Let’s get one thing clear, Matt. I came home to spend time with my brother, not to be bothered by you. Whatever you think we had in the past, you can forget about it. That will never be happening again.” You say sternly and let go of his face. He rubs his jaw and a dark look forms in his eyes as he leans down to whisper in your ear. “If you ever fucking grab me like that again, I’ll make sure you remember who’s really in control here. Don’t make me mad, Y/N.”

He then stalks off to the living room, leaving you there in shock, chills running through your body, a slight throb starting to ache in your core from just his words alone. Fuck. This was going to be harder than you thought.

After Matt left that night, you couldn’t help but let his words replay, memories from when he used to have his way with you cycling through your head. You just couldn’t deny your attraction to him no matter how much he infuriated you. You felt yourself growing wetter by the second as you thought about his voice, his large hands, what it would feel like to have his face between your legs again, his beard scratching against the inside of your thighs. Your fingers slipped inside your underwear, feeling the slickness there, circling your clit as you moaned out his name.

You couldn’t take it anymore. You grabbed your phone, calling Matt. He picked up on the first ring as if he somehow knew you needed him. “Hello?” He answered, his deep voice rumbling through the other end. “Matt…” You breathed out. “I need you.”

His cock immediately hardened at hearing your needy voice, knowing you well enough to know exactly how you needed him. “Be there in 5.” He replied, hanging up the phone and grabbing his jacket. Luckily, your house was 2 blocks from his and he walked in the cold, heart racing as he reached your bedroom window, lightly tapping.

You let him in, your mouths instantly connecting, tongues tangling and teeth clashing. You kissed each other hungrily, wasting no time removing your clothes and his as you laid on your bed. He put his hands all over your body, kissing every inch he could as you whimpered his name. “Please Matt, I can’t wait any longer.” You said, the need to feel him inside you overwhelming.

He hummed in fake empathy, pulling you roughly by your hips, wrapping your legs around his lower back and lining his cock up with your entrance. “Listen to how pathetic you sound. So needy for my cock already, angel?” He said, slicking it up and down slowly through your wetness, teasing you.

“Yes, please, please…” You responded, not bothering to fight his dominance. You were too turned on to care. He smirked at this, giving in and pushing himself inside you, no resistance from how wet you were. “Fuuuckk…” He groaned, head falling down, arms resting on either side of your head as he thrust into you at a good pace, uttering filthy words in your ear. “You feel so fucking good. Better than I remember baby.”

You moan loudly as he picks up his pace, his hips slamming into you over and over, your tits bouncing in his face as he leans down to suck on them and squeeze them in his hands. “Don’t stop Matt.” You breathe out, and he has no intentions of doing so, eager to get you to your climax. “I’m gonna cum soon.” You say and he looks up at you, shaking his head. “Not until I say so.” He warns, coming back up from your chest and wrapping a strong hand around your throat, squeezing slightly.

He grinds against you for a few minutes before you can barely take it, ready to beg him for what you need. “Pleaseee Matt. It feels so good.” You cry, making him almost bust inside of you.

He starts rubbing fast circles on your clit, pounding into you at a relentless pace. You bite your lip to keep from screaming, your eyes rolled into the back of your head in a state of bliss. “You gonna be a good girl and cum on my cock?” He asks, his other hand gripping your thigh, leaving bruises.

“Yes! Oh my god, yes.” You yell. “Go ahead baby, cum for me.” He says, granting you the permission to release your juices all over him and he moans loudly feeling you clench around him. He’s not finished with you yet though as he pulls out of you and suddenly flips you around before you have time to catch your breath.

He pulls your hips up, so your ass is in the air and spreads your legs with his knee, putting his hands on your lower back. “I’m not done yet, angel.” He says pushing himself into you again. You cry out from how sensitive you are, burying your face in your pillow. “Fuck, Matt.” You whimper and he thrusts into you at a fast pace again, the sounds of skin clapping together and wet sounds filling the room.

You feel pleasure building in you again and Matt takes a fistful of your hair, pulling it, making you moan with pleasure. You feel tears form in your eyes, another orgasm approaching from the way Matt is pounding into you, hitting your g spot repeatedly. “Matt...” You whimper, unable to say much else from overstimulation. “You can take it, baby. Ahhh, You’re such a good girl- fuck. I know you can cum for me again.” He says in between shaky breaths, feeling himself get close as well.

You cum again, crying out his name, your head slumping into your pillow as he lets go of your hair, squeezing your ass harshly as his hips stutter and he releases into you. You feel his warm load paint your walls and then he finally pulls out, both of you out of breath and he collapses down next to you.

“You okay?” He asks, a hand coming up to brush your hair from your face, seeing how fucked out you are. “More than.” You reply, with a small smile on your lips. He smiles back and wraps an arm around you as you lay on his chest, both of you quickly drifting to sleep.

✿

The next morning when you wake, Matt is gone. You feel a slight emptiness in your chest but ignore it as you get up and get ready for the day. The weekend is over, and your mom will be home soon. You have lots of plans for the upcoming week and don’t have time to think about all the feelings he has seemed to stir up from the past.

However, you get a call from her shortly, guilt in her voice when she tells you about an unexpected extension in her work trip came up and she’ll have to stay another week. You’re disappointed but you understand it’s important to her and now that you’re an adult, she’s okay with you staying home with your brother alone.

So, it’s a surprise to you when Matt shows up a couple days later, not even bothering to knock on the front door as he saunters in. You and your brother were sat on the couch, watching TV after lunch. “What’s up.” He says nonchalantly, sitting next to you. Your brother immediately jumps up in excitement, going over to him. “Matty!!” He says, a cute smile on his face. “Hey, buddy.” He says back, ruffling a hand playfully through his hair.

You ignore how insanely cute the interaction is, scoffing in annoyance. “Have you ever heard of knocking?” You say in aggravation, Matt losing the smile as he looks at you. “You should probably lock that door more often. It’s not safe. Which is why I came over to make sure things are good over here. I overheard my mom talking to your mom about how she’s still stuck in Aspen on her work trip.” He responds. You simply roll your eyes and sigh, not bothering to argue with him.

“Whatever. Come on, baby. It’s time for your nap.” You tell your brother, and he gives Matt a hug before you take him to his room, reading him his favorite book as he falls to sleep.

You close his door with a soft click, walking over to the kitchen table so you can sit and work on your essay some more. Matt’s already there, reading what you’ve typed on the screen.

“Excuse me! What are you doing.” You scold, ripping the computer out of his hands.

He laughs, leaning back in his chair next to you. “Not too bad, Y/N. I knew you were a nerd, but I didn’t know you were that smart.” He teases.

“You’re insufferable.” You reply, ignoring him as you continue typing.

“Hmm, I beg to differ. That’s not what you were saying when I had your legs shaking-“ Before he can finish, you pinch his thigh through his jeans, making him yelp.

“Don’t be a jerk, Matty. We both know that night was a mistake.” You say, and he furrows his brows in pain, his eyes closing and breathes through his nose.

Then he grabs your hand from his thigh, placing it back on your leg and rests his arm on the back of your chair while he leans in closer to you.

“What did I tell you before, hm? Do you need to me to put you in your place again?” He says, the blazing look in his eyes making you squirm in your seat.

You look back to your computer, attempting to focus as he traces circles on your bare thigh with his fingers. “Matt. Stop.” You say, trying to sound stern despite the butterflies that form in your stomach.

“Why?” He replies, moving his hand farther up your skirt.

You grit your teeth, swallowing hard. “Because… I’m trying to study.” You say weakly now. Why the fuck couldn’t you control yourself around him?

“You sure about that?” He whispers now, voice filled with desire. His hand is completely disappeared underneath your skirt now, his fingertips soft as he presses them to your clit, a wet spot forming in your panties.

You sigh in desperation, Matt satisfied with the fact that he has you wrapped around his finger.

His lips ghost across your neck and he places a soft kiss beneath your ear, making you moan aloud.

“Just say the words and I’m yours, angel…” He rasps, his dick throbbing in his pants.

You suddenly snap out of it, pushing his hand away and abruptly stand up from your chair. He was not going to continue to just have his way with you.  “If you’re not going to allow me to study in peace, then you can leave.” You say harshly, leaving the kitchen.

You storm down the hallway to your room, Matt following closely behind. “Stop following me!” You whisper yell, trying to be quiet as your brother is asleep in his room. You reach your door, attempting to slam it in his face when he puts his arm out, stopping the door before you can. He has an annoying smirk on his face when you turn to glare at him. “What’s got your panties in a twist?” He says, making you roll your eyes.

“You’re a disgusting pervert.” You sneer at him, referring to moments earlier when had a hand up your skirt.

“Don’t act like you don’t like it.” He responded, the smug smirk on his face growing wider. “Don’t act like that’s the first time I’ve touched you… Like I didn’t just have you begging me to let you cum the other night.” He added, leaning closer to you, a dangerous look in his eyes.

You scoffed, pushing him away from you by his chest. “I don’t recall anything like that ever happening.” You say with disgust in your voice. You both knew you were lying, of course. But you had done your best to try and forget your momentary weakness that night.

“Why don’t I jog your memory then?” He speaks lowly, moving closer again, forcing you to walk backwards further into your room, closing the door behind him and locking it. Your heart races and thighs clench together, that stupid smirk still on his face as he wraps one hand around your throat, the other harshly gripping your waist and smashes his lips to yours.

You melt into his kiss, his grip on your throat making your pussy throb. “Stop being such a brat.” He says, backing you up against the wall of your bedroom. He removes his hand from your throat and trails it down to the hem of your shirt pulling it off you and then ripping your skirt down your legs once again leaving you in just your bra and panties. “But I love the reaction it gets out of you.” You say breathlessly, knowing he was only going to punish you the more you talked.

He attacks your neck with wet kisses, sucking and biting all the sweet spots he knew you loved, lustful moans leaving your mouth. He suddenly drops to his knees, ripping your favorite lace thong off you.

“Matt!” You speak. “What the hell?” You were definitely making him buy you a brand-new pair later.

“Shut up.” He simply replies taking one leg and wrapping it around his shoulder, burying his face in your cunt. “Oh fuck.” You groan, tossing your head back against the wall as pushes his tongue inside you. His hands keep a firm grip on your waist as he continues to fuck you with his warm, strong tongue, only pulling out to kiss and suck on your clit, driving you to the edge.

It doesn’t take long for you to cum, the sight of Matt willingly on his knees for you, his blue eyes staring up at you.

Once you finish, Matt stands up, ready to throw you on the bed and continue to have his way with you but you decide it’s time for you to take some control.

You push him onto the bed before he can say anything, and climb on as well, the look on his face priceless.

“Take off your jeans and your shirt. Now.” You demand, sitting on your knees in front of him, while he leans back against your pillows. He does so without any protest surprisingly, and once he’s left in just his boxers, you lean down, your ass arched in the air, and pull them off. His dick springs out, slapping his stomach and you grab it, taking him into your mouth. He groans loudly, putting a hand in your hair but you push it away, removing your mouth from him with a pop. “No touching.” You say, looking up at him seriously.

He smirks at you, raising both his hands in the air. “Yes mam.”

Satisfied with this, you lower your head down again, fitting as much of him in your mouth as you can, jerking the rest, and bobbing your head. The sounds he makes get you even wetter, and you moan around him, letting him brush the back of your throat. “Fuck, baby, you’re doing so good.” He coos, gripping your sheets as you prohibited him from touching you.

He slowly bucks up into your mouth as you take him deeper and deeper into your throat, one of your hands now resting on his thigh and the other grabbing his balls. You know he won’t last long like this and before you can make him cum, he grabs your shoulders, pulling you up to sit on him.

“Come here, angel. I want you to ride me.” He says and you straddle him, sinking down on his cock. You both moan out at the feeling, and you start to bounce on it, putting your hands in his hair and tugging.

He guides your hips, helping you ride him, the air in the room now hot and thick.

“Look at you, so fucking needy. You just can’t get enough, can you baby?” he says, groaning as he watches himself slip in and out of you.

The feeling of him deep in your guts has you back in your submissive state, just nodding at his words, moaning his name. “Yes Matt.”

“Mm, shit, you look so beautiful, dumb for my cock like this.” He continues, knowing exactly what to say to bring you to that edge again. His fingertips dig into your hips, the pain mixing with the pleasure.

You lean your head against his shoulder, starting to get tired but still chasing that high.

You puff hot breaths against his neck, lazily leaving sloppy kisses.

“Want Daddy to help you, honey? Want me to make you cum on my dick again?” He rasps and all you can manage is a whine and nod against him. “Please.”

That’s all he needs to hear before he starts bucking his hips up, slapping against you roughly and you scream out, the grip in his hair becoming tighter. He’s so deep inside you at this angle, the pressure is almost overwhelming, and you can do nothing but take it, whimpering his name over and over again.

You reach your orgasm, cumming all over him and he finishes soon after you, biting into your shoulder as he does. He holds you for a little, both of you catching your breath, before you climb off of him.

You lay next to him while he rubs a hand up and down your legs, tracing small circles on your hip.

“You know, if this is how the rest of the week goes while you’re here, I won’t complain.” You joke and this makes him laugh, pulling you closer to him.

“Don’t worry angel… I’ll help you finish that essay too.” He says, pressing a kiss to your forehead before you both fall asleep.

[tachiharastanacc]

Bsd high school au except they’re still in their respective organizations and trying to pretend they’re normal kids.

Except like I cheat and just scale everyone’s ages back 3 years.

Dazai and Chuuya being the 18 yr old seniors who do NOT want to be there (except like Mori managed to trick them into thinking going to school was a contest and neither of them want to lose to the other)

The pta is like mori Fukuchi and fucking Verlaine and they’re all bitchy abt it bc they think the others are wrong. And then it cuts to Fukuzawa who just wants them to please stfu for once, this is why half of their kids are failing.

Parent teacher conferences are hell, he just wanted to open a school for kids who need the support and these grown ass men act like children

Fukuchi shows up in his missile to pick Tachihara (15 and done with his shit) and Teruko (8 and very excited abt the ensuing chaos) up from school for their doctor’s appointments every month. Nobody wants to question him tho bc he’s famous. Tachihara once said he would rather walk then be seen leaving school with Fukuchi. And he walked.

Teruko loves it tho bc her dad is the coolest actually and everyone has to know abt it.

The Akutagawas hang out with Chuuya and some of his friends who are alive bc shit be different in this au. And Higuchi somehow accidentally ends up as part of their group (they are the mafia and she somehow has no idea).

Some businessman (Fitzgerald) buys the lot nearby and keeps trying to convince everyone to be friends with his kids (Mark, Louisa, Lucy, and Steinback). They’re not like actually his kids, but their parents work for him and moved to Japan to help with construction, so ofc he has to make sure they have friends.

Idk people pls add more bc I think it’s silly and has so much potential for silliness!

[moonflowerdamie]

rating yellowjackets ships (lowest to highest!) because i am bored and also because i want people to know just how insane i am for some of the pairings in this show‼️ LETSGOOOOO

��travnat—3/10•

they’re…ok i guess? like. i don’t actively hate them, but i really don’t ship them. and yeah i get that they clung to each other and bonded over dad trauma and stuff, but a) i don’t like travis (PLS DONT ATTACK ME HE’S JUST NOT FOR ME AND I COULDNT GET OVER THE MISOGYNY) and b) i fully believe natalie scatorccio is AT LEAST bisexual and deserves a lady lover!!! so yeah. not for me.

•mistynat—4/10•

ok. OK. hear me out PLEASE bc i know some people are gonna be mad i’ve put them this low. i just don’t really see it? like i fully believe that it’s possible misty had a crush on nat in the teen timeline and i’m pretty convinced adult misty was definitely infatuated/obsessed with adult nat BUT i don’t think nat ever reciprocated? and i can’t see her ever feeling that way about misty IM SORRY. i don’t hate the ship by any means, it’s just not my favourite!!!

•jackielot—5/10•

they’re both pretty femme lesbians and i think maybe they should smooch (and then smooch ME MY GAWD PLS ONE CHANCE😫🙏🏻). that’s all i have to say about that.

•shaunanat—5/10•

i just know the rivalry in s3 is gonna HIT and maybe they should kiss and make up about it (AND THEN KISS ME TOO MY FUCKING LORD I NEED THEM BOTH SO BAD🫦). but fr i mean like a cute idea in another world yk? they would SO bully the shit out of each other and then fuck nasty about it🤝.

•crystal x misty (crusty😭)—6/10•

they were cute!!! they matched each other’s freak🥹 until misty freaked a little too hard 😔 no but actually they could’ve been cute musical theatre gfs and i would’ve been here for it!!!

•taishauna—6/10•

i LOVE their friendship in both timelines and i do prefer them platonically BUT i see the potential. i think they soften each other, and allow the other to process and feel their emotions, and also help to rationalise them. LOVE the friendship and if i didn’t prefer their other ships i could defo see myself getting into them!

•lottielee—7/10•

the disciple and the prophet??? uhhh YEAH. i mean laura lee literally haunts lottie for 25 YEARS. that bitch NEVER got over what they had. are they my favourite ship? no. do i wish they’d kissed in that lake? YES YES YES YES YES. the yearning, the religious symbolism/guilt, the TENDERNESS. i am IN.

•lottieshauna—8/10•

BRRSKLLAKSKS just yes. YES. THE PROPHET AND HER BUTCHER😫. their relationship is so complicated and beautiful but i think they could be very special, specifically in the teen timeline. they’re so fiercely protective of each other but would never admit it. they hate each other. they admire each other. they resent each other. THEY LOVE EACH OTHER. i wholeheartedly believe lottie was shauna’s bi awakening when they were like 13 and shauna never really stopped thinking lottie was gorgeous. just. THEM.

•jackienat—8/10•

i am a SUCKER for the popular x loser trope and even more so when they’re LESBIANS😁 like lottie was shauna’s awakening, nat was jackie’s. ONE MILLION PERCENT they were childhood besties and one day they kissed ‘to practice’ when they were like 11 and jackie was like ‘OH😨’ and knew then and THERE she was a lesbian. i love them your honour. like shaunanat, i think they’d bully each other, but i also think they’d be so soft with each other. OH and nat would SO tease jackie for being popular and rich and preppy and call her ‘princess’ in jest but would for real treat her like a princess and would beat up anyone who said a bad word about her. yes PLEASEEEEE.

•taivan—10/10•

THEEE IT COUPLE! they are just *mwah* chef’s kiss. especially in the teen timeline! they just balance each other so perfectly, like they were LITCHRALLY made for each other🥹. van is goofy and silly and a dreamer, tai is serious, intense; a realist. they just so clearly love each other so so much and i ADORE THEM. ‘happy wife happy life�� YYYYEEEAHHHHH. i’m gonna be so devastated when they eventually break up in the teen timeline and DONT EVEN GET ME STARTED on if/when van dies in the adult timeline☹️. not even thinking about it actually. just them and their soft tender gay love🤗.

•lottienat—1000000/10•

i genuinely will start tweaking if i think about these two for too long. they just make me so ASKSHSLSLSJSJ😫. i don’t even think i can articulate how much i love them. the rich girl and the burnout. the hunter and the prophet. THEY ARE SO PERFECT FOR EACH OTHER. the bath scene????? DIED DEAD ON THE FLOOR. ‘is that what we are’ GONE REQUIRING CPR. lottie kissing nat’s hands for so long after giving up her leadership, the last thing she had left? SIX FEET FUCKING UNDER😨. nah but fr, i NEEEED them to kiss. they would be so good for each other. the potential is…UNFUCKINGLIMITED (i am choosing to ignore the fact that nat’s dead thank you xoxo). just…the tenderness. the pining. they’re narrative foils. they’re enemies. they’re friends. they’re something more. YELLOWJACKETS…DROP A LOTTIENAT KISS IN S3 AND MY LIFE IS YOURS🙏🏻.

and finally…my fucking roman empire…

•jackieshauna—9999999999999/10•

there is a hole in my heart in the shape of these two. they’re…EVERYTHING. god they just loved each other so much but life and the wilderness and jeff and their own self-destruction got in the way. jackie loved shauna so much it killed her. shauna loved jackie so much she ATE her. they were completely undefinable—best friends, rivals, soulmates. entirely devoted. i just ache when i think about what they could have had. the tragedy of them is life-altering. shauna will miss jackie for longer than she knew her and that fact makes me want TO OFF MYSELF. they are intertwined forever, not knowing where one ends and the other begins. i wholeheartedly believe they were in love with each other but didn’t know how to say it. because of jeff, because it was 1996, because love couldn’t even possibly cover what it was they felt for each other. in my head, they’re together. in my head, they ran away together and lived a long and happy life. and it kills me to know that’s not what happened. they actually make me fucking insane and i’ll never get over them.

now have some memes bc i’m silly like that🤭

[chvnnie]

dad minho pls smth short :)

only for you >:(

me, not even five minutes ago: my weakness in my asks are dad skz

anny, sitting across the couch from me: hehehehe

Minho is sitting on the floor, back against the couch. Feet flat, knees up and pressed together. The baby covers the expanse of his thighs; beanie clad head resting on his knees while her legs scrunch, feet pressing on his stomach.

So tiny. So perfect. Only a few days together, and he’s convinced nothing in this world will ever compare to her. Pieced together, made of star and beams of bright light. Sleeping on his leg, making teeny noises as her eyes twitch.

“What are you dreaming about?” His voice is lighter than air, hands cupping her tiny head. His thumb traces the edge of the beanie, her name lovingly stitched onto the deep purple fabric.

She has his nose. That was the first thing he noticed when the doctor laid her on your chest, face scrunched as cried for the first time. It may have been too soon to tell, maybe his ego is big—

“Min.” Your eyes are watery when you beam up at your husband, cradling your newborn to your bare chest. “She’s your twin.”

It’s like every good part of him was taken into consideration during her creation. Minho can’t seem to fathom it; how could he have helped bring life to the brightest star in the universe?

She starts to stretch, little arms curling up towards her shoulders. Small smacks of her lips, head rolling to the other side.

“Is nap time over?”

A little scrunch of her nose. Protest. Minho chuckles, learning down to kiss her soft forehead.

How has he only known her for five days, yet it feels like a lifetime?

The soft sound of your footsteps echos through the quiet house. “Is she still snoozing?”

Minho hums. His head moves like he’s going to look at you, but fuck, how could he ever stop staring at her? Awe isn’t a good enough word. Is he even worthy of being her father?

You sit down next to him, resting your head on his shoulder. The bright light in the center of the room covering you, pulling you in as it did him. Your pointer fingers gently rubs the back of her hand until it opens, tiny fist wrapping around her mother’s finger.

“How are you feeling?” Minho asks, tearing himself away from hypnosis long enough to kiss the top of your head.

“Achy. Thanks for letting me take a bath—“

“Oh, stop.” He clicks his tongue, though there’s no malicious. “Silly things like that don’t deserve thanks. You are allowed time to yourself, love.”

When you smile, he sees her. Lips curling in a similar fashion, cheeks rounding out. While she only got the absolute perfect parts of him, she got everything of you.

The sun who taught the star how to shine.

“How did we get so lucky?”

Minho has never stopped asking himself that.

The knock on the door is light, yet it still startles the baby. Barely making a fuss, her eyes start to blink open. Unhappy about her nap being cut so short.

But that bitterness is short lived. The second Minho hands her to you, she lights up again. Happy little coos as Mama snuggles her close. Papa walks up to the door, not even having to check to know who’s out there.

“Let me see the baby.” Is all Seungmin says before he pushes his way into the house, making a beeline to the sink to wash his hands.

“Nah, it’s cool, she wasn’t sleeping or anything.”

“I won’t wait another day!”

The puppy’s hands are clean, practically bouncing over to where you’re sitting on the ground. Leaving the entire group he left with behind at the front door. With a roll of his eyes, Minho turns to his friends, greeting all of them with hugs. Changbin brought a giant box of diapers — “My wife wouldn’t let me leave the house without them.” He says before dropping the heavy box by the door. “It should last you a good…ten years.” — while Felix brought baked goods. Jisung’s baby is strapped to his chest, her hair sticking up in every direction (“You know I can’t leave the house without her.”). Finally, he greets Chan.

“How are you feeling?” His older friend asks as he hugs him.

“I’m good.” Minho claps his back, breaking from the hold. He takes a step back to let him inside before shutting the door. “Still doesn’t feel…real.”

Chan smiles at him. “It won’t for a while.” Following his gaze, the new father’s breath is taken away at the sight. Starlight, smiling up at the planets huddled around her. Bouncing in the arms of the sun. “And honestly, that’s the best part.”

The entire universe on earth. Just for Minho.

[sunshinesteviee]

for the domestic prompts (which are all so so cute!) how about dad steve? with

#8 - playing rock paper scissors to determine who's bringing the child(ren) to bed

I just think it’s the silly goofy thing steve would do with his partner 😭💕

oh pls this is so sweet 🥺🥺🥺 wc: 900ish, mom!reader

-

Being a parent meant you’d developed lots of special skills, but the one that was most useful was probably the superhuman hearing you’d evidently acquired. It was especially useful on nights where Phoebe couldn’t seem to stay in bed. Nights — much like the one you were currently experiencing — where she’d already gotten out of bed four times in the last hour, and you could already hear her tiny feet hitting the floor again. 

“I’ll rock paper scissors you for this one,” you murmured from where you were laying against Steve, cheek pressed into his shoulder as you watched TV together. You’d only just gotten comfortable with your husband again after the most recent trip to your daughter’s bedroom. 

“Huh?” Steve asked, drawing his gaze away from the TV to glance down at you in confusion, “What do y—”

The familiar sound of Phoebe’s bedroom door creaking open, followed by her small voice calling for you, cut Steve off, his jaw dropping, “How did you know she was up again?”

“Call it mother’s intuition,” you laughed as you pushed up off of Steve, holding your hands out for rock paper scissors. You’d each gone to tuck her back into bed twice by now, and while you knew that she was probably just feeling anxious and couldn’t help it, it was starting to get frustrating. The least you could do was make it a little less tedious. 

“Oh, you were serious?” he asked with a disbelieving laugh, a grin taking over his face as he shook his head in amusement. 

“Dead serious,” you replied, your smile matching his, “C’mon, we only have a few seconds before she comes out again. One game.”

As if on cue, Phoebe called for you again from down the hall, voice wobbling and thick with tears, “Mommy? Daddy?”

Steve gave in, turning to you for a quick game of rock paper scissors that he promptly lost. His face fell at the loss, he but  quickly accepted defeat by placing a kiss to your temple and then getting up from the couch as he called back, “I’m coming, love bug!”

He found his little girl standing in her doorway, eyes shining with tears, even in the dim lighting of the hallway. His heart ached at the sight, and he quickly hoisted her up into his arms, cradling her body to his chest, “What’s goin’ on tonight, Bumblebee? Can’t sleep, huh, sweet girl?”

Phoebe shook her head, burying her face into the soft fabric of the shirt Steve was wearing. She said something that Steve couldn’t quite make out, half because her face was pushed into his shoulder, and half because her words were laced with both sleep and tears. Pressing his palm to her back gently, he began rubbing his hand up and down her spine as he shuffled into her bedroom, “‘S okay, baby. I gotcha. C’mon let’s get you back in bed.”

The fact that his baby girl had outgrown her toddler bed never failed to break Steve’s heart, but it helped on nights when she asked one of you to stay with her. After being set back on her bed, Phoebe sniffled and looked up at Steve with her all-too-familiar puppy dog eyes, “You stay, daddy?”

Knowing he wouldn’t win this one, Steve gave in, gently scooting Phoebe over in her small bed so he could lay next to her, “Just for a little bit, Bee, not all night, okay?”

“‘Kay,” she nodded, immediately curling into Steve as he settled onto his back, nearly crawling on top of him. Just like you, she’d managed to take up most of the bed and invade his personal space. Not that he minded when it came to his girls. 

“Comfy?” he whispered, hand resting against her back again as she nuzzled into the crook of his neck. Her soft waves tickled his cheek and jaw as she nodded, but he didn’t dare to move her in hopes she’d fall asleep soon. 

Fingertips tracing along his daughter’s spine gently, Steve began to hum quietly. From the time she was a newborn, it seemed to do the trick. He’d cradle her in his arms and sing softly as he rocked her back and forth, and she was almost always asleep in a matter of minutes. Now that she was older, it happened less frequently, but never failed to put her to sleep in the same way. So it didn’t take long until Phoebe’s breathing evened out and she was fast asleep against Steve’s chest. 

She looked too peaceful to move, one chubby cheek pressed into the collar of Steve's shirt, tiny lips pursed as she breathed out softly. It always amazed him how perfect she was; the perfect combination of the two of you. It was hard not to stare.

That was how he fell asleep — and how you found him half an hour later when he still hadn't returned to the living room — one hand still on her back, the other stroking her hair, curled up together in Phoebe's twin-sized bed.

[abibliophobiaa]

My sweet babes I'm so sorry allergies are kicking your butt rn ! My dear Luna , Can I pls get a small little look into what our gourgous buttercup and Eddie are up to ??

from the daylight universe

dad!eddie munson x mom!reader

requests are open (general requests for any eddie/steve and scenario, not just daylight ones)!

——

You tried everything.

A choo-choo train. A helicopter. An airplane. And none, absolutely none of the aforementioned options, intrigued your six-month-old. In fact, most of his mushy peas ended up everywhere but his mouth. Coated his high hair tray, his bib, his cheek — even his curly head of hair.

Because every time you went to offer a spoon to your son, his head turned at the last second, whiny cries spilling from pouty lips framed by chubby cheeks. Instead he was too interested in everything happening over his shoulder to even attempt trying a new food for the week, where mere feet away his older sister was playing air guitar with your husband.

“Eddie,” you grumbled, stirring him from his little concert, drawing his attention your way, “help?”

“What? Benny Boy doesn’t like his peas?” Eddie mused, slipping into the adjoined kitchen to press a loud kiss to Benny’s cheek, earning a gummy smile and the cutest giggle. Baby boy was enamored with his dad. “Someone is a little messy.”

He gestured to all the encrusted peas on every surface area of baby Benny’s feeding area. You huffed out a grunt as Elena barreled into your lap, never wanting to miss out on the extra attention of her parent’s.

“He’s your son,” you laughed, pinching at the bridge of your nose as Eddie dragged over a chair in front of Ben, “he doesn’t like anything green.”

“Mommy is being silly, isn’t that right?”

“Mommy always siwwy,” Elena giggled, earning a little tickle from her father before he turned back to his baby and waved the spoon near Ben’s pursed lips.

Ben, knowing what his father intended, pushed his head as far back as he could into the cushion of his high chair. Pushed his face into the furthest corner, eliciting an elongated whine.

“Daddy, sing song,” Elena said brightly, leaning forward in the circle of your arms to grasp at her baby brother’s hand currently waving angrily in the air. “Benny, vegebles make you grow big!” And then she turned to you as Benny broke into a louder cry of anger, “Mommy, why is he yelling?!”

Your hand glided down her head, brushing away some messy curls, “He’s just a baby; he doesn’t know any better. You used to cry when I tried to feed you foods you didn’t like.”

“I did?”

“All the time, sweet girl,” Eddie said, holding up the spoon to his son one more time. “Aww, Ben, come on, buddy.” Eddie cleared his throat, muscle in his bicep shifting as he tried one more time to spoon feed the baby, singing quietly, “Come crawling faster.”

Ben’s eyes sparkled at the sound of his father’s voice, head turning to face him. You grunted out a laugh, because both of your children danced away while they were still on the inside whenever Eddie sang to them. Figured now he recognized it and stood at attention.

“Obey your master.”

“I can’t look at you right now,” you laughed, bouncing Elena on your knee.

“Your life burns faster,” Eddie sang, and Ben giggled, bright and joyful, mouth opening wide enough for Eddie to shovel a bite in.

The moment of truth came in the form of Ben staring at you both, brows furrowed, a little bit of extra peas spilling out from his closed lips. Baby boy’s mouth moved, worked over the contents of his palate, and both of you waited on bated breath to see if peas would be on the menu for the foreseeable future.

Your answer? Food splattering from puckered lips, the sound of his normal bubbles he’d make, paired with the force of his breath sending green sputtering into his father’s face. Eddie closed his eyes, your own laughter unable to be stifled as Benny bursted out into loud, rising giggles.

“Da-ddy,” Elena trilled, her own laughter like little bells in your ears.

Eddie jerked his head over his shoulder, a little glum, sticky with baby food, grimace on his lips. “Not a word from you, Buttercup.”

“Got a little something…” you teased, thumbing at his stubbly jawline, “right here.”

——

“I feel like I still have peas in my hair,” Eddie grumbled later that evening, when both children settled down for a nap.

“Baby food is like glitter.”

You laughed, walking across the bedroom as he rubbed a towel over his wet hair, chest bare, gray sweats hanging low on his hips. Fingers slipped up and over his torso, forging a path over his shoulders, before your arms draped around the back of his neck to hold him close.

“Hi,” you whispered, leaning up just the slightest to press a kiss to his lips, “I’m happy you’re home.”

It had been a long couple of months. He’d barely made it in time for the birth of Ben, your contractions starting while they were just getting on stage for a concert, ramping up much quicker than they did with Elena. By the time you were allowed to push, Chrissy was there to hold your hand, moving out of the way only when your husband rushed in, still sweaty from his show, hair a mess, cheeks reddened like he’d ran from the venue.

You’d tried to come along to as many local shows as possible, but doing so with a newborn at the time proved difficult. Eddie had missed a lot of those first six months, a fact he grieved every day because neither of you planned for your second child to come a few weeks earlier than anticipated. But now he was home, and you couldn’t be happier.

“Missed me?” he teased, voice a low rumble against the curve of your neck, lips seeking out the places he knew had you preening for him in seconds. “Thought about you all the time while I was gone. My best friend, my wife, the mother of my children.”

His fingers dragged up the edge of your silky shorts, toying with the hem of your panties, along the wet spot already forming there, dragging a slow circle along your clothed clit. “Thought about you like this too,” he practically purred, forehead dropping against yours as you gasped against his lips, “when did Steve and Chrissy say they’re taking the kids?”

“Five,” you huffed out an exasperated sigh, craving nearness to him too. He’d only gotten back the night before, had walked over to your bed and face planted into it after holding both your babies tight until they’d gone off to bed. “And then it’s just us. And…a teeny tiny gift I might have gotten you.”

“Are you pregnant again?” His eyes twinkled at the thought, and you shoved him jokingly at the mere notion, though you’d love one or two more in the future.

“I’m going to need at least another year before we think about that — but no, it’s…” You paused, grabbing his hand to lead him toward the garage. “Remember how we’d both said we always wanted a dog?”

“Baby…” He couldn’t help the excitement in his tone, the way his eyes softened and then widened when he saw the golden poof of hair hidden in a box, a giant red bow around his furry neck. “You got me a puppy?”

“Shhh,” you giggled brightly, insides melting as your husband reached down to pluck the puppy from its box, “I haven’t told the kids yet. I wanted to show you first.”

Said puppy wiggled in his new dad’s arms, pink tongue rolling across his chin, his cheeks, his nose, making your husband burst out in laughter at the influx of pure love.

“Welcome home, Eddie,” you said, folding against his chest and patting at the puppy’s head. “I love you.”

He kissed the top of your head as the puppy leaned over to lick your nose. “I love you too, sweetheart.”

——

[2facedweirdo]

Hey weirdo hope your trip and camp went well!!

My question is, what blogs/vns/creators do you like?

with tags so we know who ur talking to ofcourse!! have a good day!

hello!! My trips went well thank you!! hmmm….ok let’s see!

@campwillowpeak silly little vn with a pyromaniac,Gavin,Gavin’s friend and depressed dad <33 I love this game so much ngl

@mama- -sloth (I hope I wrote that right) AAAAAAA ILY SOO MUCH<33 HER HUMOR?!?! HELLO?!

@restartheartvn Ezra and Chris Ezra and Chris Ezra and Chri- I love this game, it has good storyline, good music and amazing characters!! Fun fact!! I headcanon kenneth as societyboy from blooming panic

@queenlilithprime SO SILLY PT2!! Amazing person in general tbh. They are honest, respectful, pretty just amazing friend ngl!! (Also happy restart heart anniversary!!)

@stnaf-vn. AHHHHH- again one of my very very favorites 🤭 it so fun and has amazing lore and art! Also Carter <3 (and friend of course but you know, Carter)

@itsya-boi never really talked much with yaboi ngl. But from what I’ve saw, they are also the best human alive! Would love to be friends with them, 10/10 human being right there

@you-and-him-vn Enemies to lovers with Chloe and Adam!! I love this game, THE LORE AND STORY HELLO??

@— unknown hermit as we all know hermit left so I’m not tagging her here, but I actually really liked hermit and think the didn’t deserve all the hate she got.</3

@thekrows-nest Krow!!!!!!1!1!1!1! Best boy right there!! Mwuah!! @winndycakes amazing person who has amazing art! They also helped me out when I got a hate anon along with @queenlilithprime which makes me value them even more. <3

@lavender-teardroplettes I.LOVE.SI ILY ILY ILY SOOOOOOO MUCH <33 my very first friend on this platform and I respect him for wanting to me friends with me!! I love him as a person again, genuinely 100/10 person right there 💗💗

@clownboymcchucklefuck Nothing can describe how much I love this person. THE SILLIENES??? SILLY!!

@fantasia-kitt 🤭🤭🤭 Now THIS is an amazing game who has a amazing future! Funfact2: I headcanon that my oc and hyugo are childhood friends!. As the creator however is also an amazing person you means well for their community. I hope the hiatus means well for them

@darqx AHHHHHHHHH. Every time I see a demon man that’s tall I.just.scream!! I love rire <3 as for darqx however I’m surprised that both of the other creators of btd got in scandals while draqx is still standing, impressive!

@robobarbie although I sti haven’t played seekL yet, I immediately know it’s gonna be a good game because robo made it. For blooming panic however, *deep breath* AAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. IT HITS THAT ONE PART OF MY BRAIN AND SCRATCHES IN A WAY THATS ADDICVE. I also like their humor!

ANYWAYS LITTLE MUSHROOMS BE SURE TO CHECK OUT THESE BLOGS I WILL BE MAKING A PART 2 IF THIS CAUSE ITS TOOOO LONG AND IM TIRED!! SEE U LATERSSSS

Btw all games and blogs mentioned are amazing people and games check them out pls <3

[sunflowers-and-scales]

hey!! i draw stuff (and write too. sometimes) :))

u can call me sunny if you like (and i’ll take requests//suggestions but only sfw pls :0)

also pls talk to me abt:

persona 3 and 4

ace attorney (!!!!)

hunterxhunter

animal crossing

tomodachi life (do ppl still play this)

pokémon

slay the princess (!!!!!)

the owl house

spiderverse

the dragon prince

disastrous life of saiki k

deltarune (a little)

other stuff probably too idk what all of my interests have been ever

i put oc art under the tag #sunflowers and scales

if you want to draw them (pls i will love you forever) you can do the same :D

v oc info under here v

main oc intro stuff!! (feel free to skip this, but i draw them a lot so in case ur interested)

from left to right:

ryu:

little sheltered rich kid boy & ambulatory wheelchair user. he lives in a big beige mini mansion on a coastal cliff and is perpetually bored until ian breaks into his home and drags him on an adventure. he’s also kind of part fish (though my ocs have an elemental system so i guess it’s “water element” technically lol)

he enjoys: rain, cats, his friends, the color blue, video games, alone time

he does not enjoy: the color beige, yelling, crowded public spaces, heat, sunburns

ian:

lives in an elemental village taken over by some guy named Duke who also married his mom. he doesn’t know it but he is NOT dukes kid lmao. he’s part plant element, part air element (harpy basically) (hence the shiny silly wings) and he gets kicked out for being the product of an affair whereupon he breaks into ryu’s home and is like “hey help me find my mom again pls”. he is the pathetic wet dog to ryu’s pathetic wet cat.

he enjoys: sunny days, light showers, his friends, sewing

he does not enjoy: fire, small enclosed spaces, extremely coarse dirt

kei:

is ian’s older half brother and is the more emo of the two. he’s part plant-element and part fire-element and can manipulate fire though cannot prevent burns like a typical fire element. he gets wrecked by duke on numerous occasions for trying to have an opinion and/or existing (todoroki/zuko dupe). dw they get him eventually. he’s also shorter than ian and mad about it.

he enjoys: green tea, the beach, studying biology, ample relaxation time

he does not enjoy: loud voices, being alone, not being able to swim, fire hazards

alyce:

part of a second elemental village, this one ruled by her father (and ian’s father (gasP)) who’s an air element (so is she). in line to rule until ian shows up and her dad’s cringe so he gets the throne by default. he does not want it. also their dad gets burned to death three minutes later but that’s kinda irrelevant. she’s extremely well organized and tolerant but also has talons and knows how to use them.

she enjoys: archery, recreational diving, nighttime, quiet

she does not enjoy: cats, molting season, people who talk and/or chew too loud

[silly-little-gooses]

your hc for jameson as a girls dad are so cute 😭💗💗 could you pls make hc about averyjameson as parents together? have the nicest day!!!

ofc I’d love to you’re so sweet! <3

avery and jameson have three kids - two daughters and one son.

jameson claims he can understand the language of baby talk. strangely enough, whenever his toddlers babble about something, he can always get it right what they need.

jameson cried harder then avery when he found out she was pregnant. same thing with their births.

jameson and avery got to every single one of their kids sports games and scream their head offs supporting them.

nash, xander, and grayson are the best uncles ever and are always trying to spend time with their nieces and nephews and help whenever they can.

avery can make her babies laugh with just about anything. she could make silly faces, talk to them, drop a pan on the floor, and the little kids would burst out laughing and find everything amusing.

avery and jameson hire a very large security team for their kids, like ten to twenty people. they’ve experienced first hand the affects of paparazzi and social media and they really want to keep their kids safe from that.

avery absolutely adores dressing up their toddlers in the cutest little outfits ever. boy, girl, doesn’t matter, she will find the most adorable clothing and accessories.

jameson loves to embarrass his kids in front of their friends/crushes. he never goes too far but he always likes to add in a teasing comment or dad joke or riddle.

their son looks just like jameson, the resemblance is a bit frightening. the same green eyes, sarcastic smirk, fluffy brown hair, etc.

this one is obvious but avery and jameson’s child is the most beautiful, gorgeous, majestic, ethereal being in the history of man. two gorgeous parents, how could you not?

avery and jameson have witnessed how pressuring and stressful it can be to be a hawthorne and live up to all those expectations. so, they don’t force their kids to win world records or start their own business or anything like that. they let them be kids.

I mentioned this before but jameson is not allowed to help name children. he would pick the most unserious, ridiculous names ever. fortunately, avery picks the prettiest names for their kids, with the help of max and libby ofc.

avery and jameson want their kids to feel like normal kids. they read a picture book before bed, treat their kids to ice cream, talk to their teddy bears, etc. anything to make their kids feel happy.

road trips with the hawthorne-grambs family is always absolutely crazy. there’s music blasting, snacks being eaten, sing-alongs, a bit of arguing, all the fun of road trips.

also here’s a bit of an update! six of crows content won my poll by a landslide so, please please please send in any requests you have for both the inheritance games content or six of crows content bc I do all of this for you lovely people! byeee! <3

[mxsonxmountx]

MM x best years

A/N: I haven’t written in years, so pls forgive me. I wanted this to be a full length imagine, but instead I’ve gone for the ‘best years’ in the relationship. This is in no particular order, just a few things that came to mind.

Word count: 1547

Requested: Yes/No

Requests: Open/Close

Bold: mason

Italic: you 

——

Meeting him for the first time:

You and your friends was in Portsmouth for some lunch for the day, Mason was home for the summer to spend some quality family time together, you and your friends was just about to order some drinks for the table until you heard everyone gasp around you. You didn’t pay much attention, until your friend said “don’t mean to freak out or anything but if you look to your right, the Mason Mount is sitting right next to us”. You just laughed, not believing her in the slightest because why would you? Why would he be here for you thought to yourself? As much as you wanted to look, just to catch a glimpse of him you couldn’t do it. You excused yourself from the table so you could go to the ladies, little did you know Mason also happened to walk to the bar to order his family some drinks. When you got back to your table, there was a glass of wine in front of where you was sitting, you didn’t order it that’s for sure. There was a piece of paper under it which looked like a note, you opened it to see who it was from and it read “hoping this will get your attention, you look nice, mason x” you couldn’t help but blush a little, well you to you it was, according to your friends you went bright red. Before you decided to leave the restaurant, you had to walk past his table to walk out, you couldn’t help but to give him a wink and a smile before leaving. Later that night, your phone vibrated and it was an Instagram follow request: masommount has requested to follow you. You accepted it, of course you did, you wanted to thank him properly for the drink, but everyone knew that wasn’t got to be the last you was going to see of him.

Mason meeting your family:

“Babe please can we leave now, we don’t want to be late. I don’t want your dad to hate me even more” “he doesn’t hate you Mase, he just doesn’t like Chelsea” “yes exactly he hates me” “no he doesn’t now stop being silly” you came down the stairs of the house that you shared with Mason back in London, wearing a simple pair of black jeans and one of Masons old shirts, and an overnight bag since you was both staying there for the weekend. On the way to your parents, Mason was adamant that he wanted to stop off at the florist to get some flowers for your mum. He came out with two bouquets of flowers that you’ve ever seen, you knew instantly that she would love them. “these are for you darling, couldn’t forget my number one” “Mase these are lovely, thank you” “only the best for my girl” shortly after you arrived at you family home, with Mason now being nervous than ever his hand was holding onto you tighter than either. You walk up the path, just when you was about to knock on the door, your sibling answered the door “well well well, who’d thought you’d be the one dating a famous Chelsea player. Welcome Mount, welcome to the west ham household” your sibling said to Mason before they pulled him in for a hug. “Well, she chose the better London team” Mason said laughing nervously. Your dad greeted Mason next, “Good afternoon Mason, it’s nice of you to join us. We’ve heard so much about you” and just like that all of his nervous gradually went. “Mr y/l/n I have brought you a bottle of gin, your daughter told me it’s your favourite and for your lovely wife, I have some flowers for her”. You helped your mum lay the table for dinner that evening, whilst your father and Mason was talking about football. Once the table was ready and all the food was on the table, which was a lovely spread by your mother, your father couldn’t praise Mason enough throughout the night, you knew from that moment that they both had no issues with him which you couldn’t be anymore happier about.

The next morning, you was awaken by the smell of eggs, bacon and sausages all cooking in a pan, you made your way downstairs to only see your mum and Mason making breakfast for everyone. “you know Mase, she’s never been happier until she met you in Portsmouth that day. Between me and you, she knew who she was, she just didn’t want to act like typical fan” “oh I knew she did, she’s best friends with my team mates girlfriend” your mum chuckled, whilst mason got out the plates and saw you standing in the door way “oh there she is, good morning beautiful”

First anniversary:

Mason wanted to make your anniversary special. Very special. He spoke to your boss to see if you can have a few extra days of work, so he could take you to Mykonos, the only place you’ve been dying to go to with him. You woke you to your shared room with Mason, balloons filled the celling, red roses on the bed next to you followed with your card and flight tickets inside. “Happy anniversary darling, this has been the best year of my life” “oh mason, I thought we wasn’t going to do anything so big. My gifts is nothing compared to this” “it’s not about the gifts, it’s about how much I love you and you deserve everything and more” you got out of bed to give him a hug and quick kiss on the lips. You looked at everything having enough time to take them in “what’s on the balloons? Oh my go-“ “yes, I’ve printed every single picture we have, and put them onto the balloons. I wanted to make this year special for you. You give me the best years” you couldn’t help but cry slightly, but they was happy tears for sure. “Here I got you this, I know it’s nothing compared to this but I hope you like it” you handed him some aftershave, a scrapbook and a pair of his favourite trainers. “Here, open your card” the card reads “Dear y/n my darling girlfriend. This has been one of the best years of my life, you’ve supported me through everything you could’ve and more. I love you more than anything. You are my everything. I can’t wait to take you to dream place… Mykonos, 7 nights, just you and me. Happy anniversary baby. Love you always, your mase xxx” “you’ve got to be kidding me, Mykonos? Just us? For the whole week? I cannot wait. This is the best year of my life. Happy anniversary mason”

You meeting his family:

“It’s 3am, why are you still baking? Don’t you think you’ve made enough?” “Mason mount, you can never bake enough cookies and brownies, does your sister even like brownies? Oh god what about-““stop right there, I can promise you they will love them but please come to bed now. We need to leave in a couple of hours to drive home and the beds cold without you. You’ve done more than enough here darling. No arguments, please come to bed? For me?” you sighed knowing that he was right, you started baking at 9pm and its now 3am, Mason went to bed around 11pm since he was bored of waiting for you, and the last time he helped you bake it went all wrong. You woke up around 10am – still tired from all the baking, you didn’t want to look too overdressed or too under dressed, so you settled for a nice summery dress and a pair of vans mainly for comfort and a denim jacket to take the chill of your back. “You look beautiful, come on lets go” “can we just wait for a minute please? I have something for Debbie, Tony and Jaz arriving” “what have you brought?” “Only some flowers for her and jaz and some golf clubs for Tony. Do you think-“even before you could finish your sentence, the doorbell rang which means only one thing it was you delivery. The drive to his family home was only about 2.5 hours so your nerves was at ease, especially with his hand interlocked with yours resting on your thighs.

“mum, dad, jaz, summer, this is y/n” you gave Debbie and Jaz their flowers and Tony his golf clubs which he absolutely loved and promised that he’d use them for his next golf session with his son. 

“You little one, you must be summer? Uncle mason has told me a lot about you darling” you bent down so she could hug you if she wanted, and to your surprise she welcomed you with a hug, which threw you off a little bit cause you wasn’t expecting it. Jaz got out the baby photos of Mason for you to see, you couldn’t help but die of cuteness when you saw them, you promised you was going to use them for his birthday just to embarrass him even more. All of Mason’s family made you feel so welcome and you couldn’t thank him and them enough for that

[manicplank]

Alright now this one will be dimn but

Head cannons about how they feel about the simps?

hehehehe I like this prompt hehehehehehe

How do they feel about their simps?

Peppino: He's incredibly confused! Who in their right mind would want to [TAUNT SFX] a fat old man like him? He doesn't realize there are people out there that love dad bods. Even without the lust, why are people obsessed with him?? Regardless, he feels a bit honored and flattered.

Gustavo: Oh goodness, people want to do WHAT to him? Hug him and snuggle him? Boy, he would LOVE that! He's so honored that people love him as a person. He feels the love and positivity, and it makes him so happy. By the way, Gustavo, people want to uh... Yeah, never mind.

Mr. Stick: Woah! Ladies, fellas, and theydies* want him, he's shocked! He doesn't necessarily dislike his appearance, but he didn't realize people found him so fine. He totally lets it get to his head. He's just confused as to what a "twink" is. Don't tell him. He can find out on his own.

Pepperman: Finally, he's been recognized for his amazing art. He has a following, his own fan base, and even people making fan art of him. How wonderful! He might flex those muscles just to make them shiver with glee. Oh, how they must worship his greatness!

The Vigilante: WHO ARE ALL YOU PEOPLE??? HE DOESN'T KNOW YOU AND HE DOESN'T KNOW WHY PEOPLE ARE DRAWING PICTURES OF HIM!!! Oh wait, he has "simps"? Oh, that's a new term to him, but alright. He thought y'all were angry criminals hunting him down. Well, this old man is flattered that people admire him!

The Noise: Heh, more fans, huh? Well, that explains why NTV ratings suddenly shot up. Let him just show off the goods to his fangirls and fanboys and fan-nonbinaries. (Is there a term for that?) He's such a cocky little bastard. Look, but don't touch! *finger guns* (Seriously, don't touch. He bites. Hard.)

Noisette: WHO THE HELL ARE THESE PEOPLE AND WHY ARE THEY SIMPING FOR HER AND HER BOYFRIEND??!?!?!? She is totally fuming! At least over his simps. As for her simps, she's totally flattered! She doesn't understand the hype. She's just a simple little lady trying to run her café.

Fake Peppino: Omg people! Him loves people! Can he eats them? No? Boo. :( He's excited that people want to give him hugs and squishes and pets! Yay!!! If only they would come into Bruno's, he pretty pretty promises that he won't try to bite or eat them!!!

Pizzaface: What? He has what now? Simps? Like the Simpsons? Simpletons? Yes, simpletons. Heh. Of course he's to be worshipped. People love pizza, he could imagine they'd love a flying pizza. He's confused on why they keep saying he's hot. He hadn't been in an oven.

Pizzahead: Yes, of course he has simps. I mean, who wouldn't want a piece of that pizza? Ah, to have such loyal fans, he loves it! He's totally flattered and absolutely lets it go to his head. Who would've thought his ego could get any bigger.

Pillar John: Oh, thank God! People want to save him! He's been waiting for so long! Wait, they want to WHAT him??? OHHHH, hug! He thought you said... Nevermind. Please send help! He wants out of this tower without dying!

Gerome: What the [taunt SFX] is a simp? Oh... Heh, neat. He thinks strangers being in love with him is a little strange, but he'll take any love he can get. Lord knows he doesn't get enough of it. Cool. *back to mopping*

-

** If "theydies" makes anyone uncomfortable pls lmk and I will change it! I thought it was just a silly term that Stick would use to refer to his enby fans.

edited to add that this is what noise considers "showing off the goods" (it wouldn't let me link it)

[vivianne-is-tired]

First time watching Umbrella academy, kinda nervous ಠ◡ಠ

SO! my friend kinda introduced me to this show, and I have some feedback to share on the first(and only first)episode since I'm a slow watcher :<

the scene starting w/ the indoor pool? hell nah. pools irl are classy, in movies and tv shows tho? depressy and murdery. 0/10. no thank youuuu. I saw the girl kiss the guy and jump in being like-welp, it was nice knowing you for 0.5 seconds, enjoy that sea monster!

then the blood staining the water starts and I'm like, yep. just as I suspected, here we go-AHHH OHHH WTFWTFWTFWTFTFTFWTF WHY IS SHE PREGNANTTTT?!?!?!!?!11

she js kissed the guy. that's all that happened, why is she pregnant??t

his is why you should use protection kids ⇎_⇎

now, here are my few comments Abt the show so far, strap in, its a doozyヽ(｡ゝω・｡)ﾉ

let's start off with a few things(spoilers for episode ahead, read at your own risk):

Luther being #1(oldest sibling) and being the tallest??unheard of. make him short. we love older siblings who are short kings.queens :333

Second, can we talk abt Klaus overdosing then high fiving(?!)the paramedic that revived him like it was a normal Tuesday??? sir, I don't think you're even remotely human anymore. that's an eldritch being if I've ever seen one●_●

Also, Diego.....man am I abt to beef with this man if it's ever on sight. he defeats the thief's and LEAVES THE FAMILY THEY TIED IN THE BONDS!!! like-0 stars, would not recommend his services to no one >:(((( I wouldn't let him save me, cause what's the point? he's js gonna leave me there to rot without freeing me ;n;

now, Vanya might be my fav so far, cuz the violin performance at the beginning? chef's kiss, she's my daughter now(until further notice) :) makes me so sad that no one was there to applaud her tho, I would've been her biggest supporter being louuuud asf, lowkey

now, I personally don't trust the father since, hello? billionaire adopting a bunch of supernatural kids instead of supporting the parents/gaurdians? BUYING THEM??? immediate red flag. he don't give Tony or Bruce vibes. I feel as though he only mansplains and manipulates. not even malewife since he has 7 diff women pushing the strollers like-brother eughщ(ಥДಥщ)

allison being the normal one has got to be the funniest shit I've ever witnessed. i get that's she's also famous but get this, one of her siblings is a "recovering" addict, an introvert, another introvert who dresses up like daredevil and batman's secret lovechild, and an astronaut. can we pls make it make sense?

Diego breaking into the coroner’s to get his “father’s” report? The dis-fucking-respect??? No. On. Sight.(i rlly like coroners and any disrespect to them is a personal insult)

HOLD UP! Why is there a MONKEY BUTLERRRRR?!?!??!!11 I thought it couldn’t get weirder. Help 🙁

Vanya making snacks for 5 hoping he would come back, aw, my heart js imploded. Thank you.

Bro couldn't even spare a second to bid goodnight to his kids. Ew.

Klaus is a silly little guy, thats my impression of him so far. Using humor to cope, that's me. I kin him now(also him being glad his dad’s dead, me frfr) “exsqueeze me” fav klaus line :)))

Allison and Luther making fun of Diego has got to be my fav thing ever! they’re me your honor  :3333

Oh Alison, my poor baby mama. PATRICK STAR, give claire back you son of a nice woman >:(((((

*awkward silence ensues*

Klaus in the background:*aggressively pouring expensive ahh scotch into a cup*

Kalus also:Wearing his sisters skirt like a girlboss(while high)😤

Luther, baby, pls dont accuse your traumatized siblings of murdering your very not so brat dad.(edit:he had every fucking right)

The way Allison just walks up to the shooter? Very mindful, very cutesy, very demure<3

*The man getting yeeted through the window*

The news anchor:now i've been in many situations such as this-

It's the kids walking out like they didn't just commit homicide to the nth degree….also, there’s an octopus child. Idk what to say.

Also, REGINALD HARGREEVES. CALL MY NOW ADOPTED DAUGHTER NOT SPECIAL AND I'LL SHOVE YOUR OWN FIST SO FAR UP YOUR ALREADY STUCK UP ASS🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬

Not Klaus spilling the urn. He's such a queen for that tho

Luther blasting music for the whole house to hear? Like, that player is blasting music loud enough to be heard through a literal mansion. I need to know how that works??? Are the walls that thin???????

And everyone started to dance. High School musical who??

And the mom folding laundry like-oh well, at least they’re happy!

Klaus’  “Daddy??” when the lightning started😂😂😂😂😭😭😭

*a weird blackhole portal thingy exists*

Klaus:throws a fire extinguisher at it.

Everyone else:bruh.

Five’s first reaction to coming back to make a sandwich is so real to me tho.(although what he made is an abomination, i do not stand by that)

It’s his nonchalance and everyone else shitting metaphorical bricks.

Basically what happened was; 

“You’re 58?!”

“Yeah, like it's a big deal?”

Ok, hold up. Who’s ben? Did I skip a chapter? A book? A whole movie?? Who tf Ben??

Ohhh, nvm js remembered he’s the octopus child.

Ok, klaus is rlly js pretty princess atp

I need Diego to stop trying to be different. You ain't built diff for shit. Get an umbrella you kook. 

The mom is now suspicious to me. Not so sigma of her to forget that her darling husband is dead.[sarcastic]

The monkey is lying cause what??you’re indebted to someone who turned you into a reverse animorph🤨🤨🤨🤨🤨 bitch pls, bsffr

I now have beef with Diego, aka number 2, aka a crusty musty bitch who doesnt shower and wears kevlar all day. Why are you acting that way?? #justice for ben statue ✊😔)

Is the mom a robot? A slave? Why does she behave like that, i'm concerned now 🙂

DID THIS BITCH AS MF FORCE HIS KIDS TO GET TATTOOS??? Ohhh it's on, old man. I will hunt you down to the end’s of earth itself. Wait he’s dead, nvm. I will instead hunt you down to the end’s of the planes of the afterlife, you degraded sun glare. you overdrafted bank fee. You unnecessary movie sequel. Built like an easy bake oven cooking a broken bedazzled gnome.

Fun fact: the “dad” watches his kids while they sleep 😀 pedo pedo pedo pedophiliaaaaa~

Ok, the moneky butler is kinda ok to me now. Like-he may be dumb giving his life to raginald but he tried to comfort Vanya, so he’s ok in my books.

Allison asking where vanya is makes me soft

5 is a menace, according to the level amount of sass he holds in his little body.

The mom is a robot…..whoopdedoo(im not even surprised atp, just downright exasperated)

I feel so bad for the waitress ngl, imagine assuming some kid dressed in a uniform out that late is innocent and turns out he can take down 6 different men armed to the teeth with guns, and you served him black coffee too. I feel like she’ll never give kids black coffee again….

Me vibing to music while 5 commits murder:even old new york, was once new amsterdam, why’d they change it, i cant say, ppl js like it better that wayyyy

There’s a tracker implanted in 5?man this just keeps getting better, and stupider

Diego….idk wether to punch you in the face or kiss you for (probably) killing your father<333 

Also klaus, i do not in fact like waffles 😣

Also, we just found benny boy!! he ‘d dead and emo

5 and vanya being bestiessss, okkk im following

this shit show keeps pulling plot twists out of their asses and I'm concerned for my little remaining sanity ಠ╭╮ಠ

So far, i like it. Sorry for the whole reaction channel vibes i was having this whole time but i had to share :3333