#(After almost 3 years of starting and stopping I got back to F Ran blog post no. 3 a few days ago.)

[magicalgirlsandcerulean]

It's 18 days until the movie and today's shikishi is from Eguchi, Karurusu's voice actor. Follow the official X account and repost this tweet before Jan. 6th 2025 at 23:59 (JST), but note shikishi will only be sent to those within Japan.

YouTube short time: "Instead of Relying on Someone Else, You Have to Make Yourself Shine!" from LOVE! LOVE! ep. 5.

[heezoneie]

Hello lovely! 💕 Hope you're having a good day!

Can I ask for a reaction from stray kids where they meet you at a fan meeting and are attracted to you?

Thank you so much and I like your blog!

hey babe! i’m having a great day, thanks for asking🥺! i’m glad you enjoy my blog, and i hope you enjoy this reaction! <3

group: stray kids

member: all

genre: fluff

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chan:

• when you first walked up to Chan his breath immediately got caught in his chest.

• your bright smile never leaving his view for a second. he couldn’t believe his eyes.

• immediately when you reached the table he began to make conversation. “hii, what’s your name?” he said as he grasped your hands in his.

• “my name’s y/n” his heart began to beat a little faster at the sound of your voice. he has never reacted this way to a fan before.

• chan found himself getting flustered as you ranted about how good of a leader he is. “overall you are the most caring, loving, all round amazing person and leader there could be.”

• his cute dimple showed as he hid his face behind your hands that were still locked with his. he lifted his head and your eyes met with his comforting brown ones.

• “i know i’m technically not supposed to say this,” he began while eyeing the staff behind him, “but i think your super pretty, and i would like to meet you again.”

• your eyes widened at his statement. you’ve read about situations like this happening, but never in a million years did you think it would actually happen.

• chan leaned into your ear and whispered, “meet me outside after the meeting, i can’t wait to talk to you more.” with that he pulled away with a wink.

Minho:

• you had walked up the table while Minho had his back turned. when he turned back around, his eyes widened.

• “oh sorry, i didn’t mean to scare you..” you said sheepishly. minho.exe has stopped working he felt his heart soften at your voice.

• he smiled, “no no, it was my fault i should have been paying attention.” as you were handing him some plushies of his cats, you happen to accidentally drop one.

• ofc minho couldn’t pass up the opportunity to tease you. “mY cAts!! mY pReCioUs cAts!” he grabbed his heart dramatically.

• you quickly picked up the stuffed soonie, and handed it to him. “i can’t believe i just did that,” you muttered to yourself.

• (he’s totally whipped already, but who’s keeping track?)

• “i think you owe me now, after dropping my car of course” he panned. quirking an eyebrow, his statement puzzled you.

• “to replace the pain you’ve inflicted upon this stuffed soonie, i think you should come meet the real soonie and give him all the pets he deserves.”

• deciding to go along, you nodded your head, “ i definitely think i should, to apologize.” grabbing your phone from your hand, minho put in his address.

• “be there by 6, don’t be late.” he gave you a smirk and sent you down to meet the rest of the members.

Changbin:

• we are all aware how this man is a s o f t i e as soon as he saw you in the crowd his face would immediately light up.

• he could not keep his eyes off of you (lowkey jealous when you were talking to the other members)

• but oh boy, as soon as you reached him, he would turn into a big baby, and probably tease you about not coming to him first. not like you had a choice

• he would grab your hands and pretend cry into them, which made your face turn bright red. this man knows what he’s doing to you btw.

• he would be so smiley, and makes sure to show off his famous aegyo, bc he wants to to fall for him

:((( even though you already have smh

• binnie would 100% make sure to somehow give you his number and meet up afterwards, bc he’s totally not in love or anything

Hyunjin:

• i got a little carried away with hyun’s😅

• our drama king

• ofc when his eyes found you, his jaw dropped, i mean physical fell

• his eyes followed you everywhere. he looked like this: 👀🙀 he definitely tried to convince chan to switch places with him so he could talk to you first

• when chan said no, he went 😠😠😔

•pouty baby bc he just wanted to talk you first:(((

• when you finally got to him, he flashed his always amazing eye smile. you noticed he had some makeup covering his mole under his eye, and you told him about how much you loved it.

• he:(((( wiped:(((( off:(((( the:(((( makeup:((((

• like when felix did it to his freckles in that one interview? yeah that’s what hyunjin did

• he is also a lowkey highkey flirt with you, constantly touching your hair, hands, face, basically anything he can within reason

• he got so sad when you had to leave, almost to the point where he got so caught up in pouting that he nearly forgot to ask for your number till you were already walking away.

• this boy did not care if anybody else saw, or what the staff was gonna say. he jumped out of his chair and quickly ran to you.

• gaining your attention, he grabbed your wrist and pulled you out of sight of all the other impatient stays wanting to see their precious hyunjin.

• that’s where he asked for your number, and went on a little rant about how he’s sorry he made a scene.

• it’s safe to say you guys went for food right after the fan sign

Jisung:

• when he saw you walk in, he knew. like he KNEW that he wanted to talk to you, hang out with you, etc.

• so so incredibly hyper when you got to talk to him

• this boy would be so goofy with you, grabbing your hands and flailing them around. it would just be him wanting to make you laugh :((

•jisung swore could swear that when he made you laugh for the first time, angels descended from the heavens.

• he didn’t want to stop talking with you, he just wanted to take you back to dorm right then and there, and just hang.

• you best bet this boy talked to you until finally the staff had to intervene to get the line moving again. he handed you a piece of paper, and told you to wait until you got out of line to open it.

• once you finished going through the line, you found a empty area near the exit and opened the little piece of paper.

• wrote in a messy scribe from writing fast, the paper said “meet me behind the building @ 4, if anybody bugs you tell them your with me. ;)”

Felix:

• he saw you as soon as the fan sign started he basically started bouncing in his seat. (yk the vibrating thing he does? he did that out of happiness.)

• lix would watch you interact with the other members with the biggest smile on his face.

• he would admire all the little mannerisms or quirks/habits you have while making conversations. he just watches with big doe eyes full of admiration.

• he knew he n e e d e d to talk to you. when you got to him, he was so excited and giddy.

• this boy just looked at you with wonder as you talked. he would listen to you talk and laugh all day if he could.

• he thinks you are the most adorable thing to ever walk the earth. he just wants to bundle you up and feed you brownies and cake :((( (someone pls find me a felix)

• when he realized time was up, and he was gonna have to let you go, he got so sad. but was he gonna let you go? no, no he was not.

• felix quickly grabbed a stuffed bear from behind him and wrote his number on its little bow.

• as he handed you the bear he said, “pls call me, i want to see you again.🥺”

Seungmin:

• bby seungminnie

• okay, i feel seungmin would be the best at hiding the fact that he is 100% simping for you even though he just met you 5 seconds ago.

• he would act normal, but on the inside be a complete mushy gushy mess, crying over how adorable and cute you are.

• secretly, would be cherishing the way your hand fit in his perfectly, and the way he never wanted to let go :(((((

• he would look at you with the most adorable eyes ever. he would definitely give you the sweetest most softest smile ever.

• his eyes got so sad when you told him you had to move on to the member bc other stays were becoming impatient :(

• he discreetly put his phone number in your phone, and made sure to tell you to text him asap :(

• i want a seungmin.

Jeongin:

• bbys eyes would be literally this “🥺” when he saw you.

• he was immediately so taken back and needed a minute to compose himself before he ran up to you himself.

• when you were talking to him, he would give you the biggest most cheesey smile ever. he was just so happy to be talking to you.

• he was already falling for the way you talked, acted, looked, just everything about you.

• he would hold your hands so tight, never wanting to let you go. his eyes wouldn’t leave yours for a second, not even when the staff tried to talk to him.

• when he finally decided to listen to the staff telling him to wrap up the conversation, he made sure to tel you to meet him after the fan sign

• and who were you to pass up and opportunity like that?

• he was so happy when he saw you show up after, bby couldn’t stop smiling the whole day. :((

[limitlessgojo]

Blood Bound: Blackened Bond (Ch 15)

Warnings: Action, Coarse Language, Fighting, Descriptions of Blood

Previous Chapter: Big White Lies

Next Chapter: 土御門天皇 (Tsuchimikado)

Tags: Kamo Noritoshi x Reader, Soulmates AU, Angst, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Fem!Reader

Taglist: @lessie-oxj @rizzo-nero @whoreuc @fkngkumiko @isl3t @gojoussunglasses @onepotatostand-blog @s-t-f-u-b-i-t-c-h @sunaswife @lordguameow @track5enthusiast

Notes: If you want to be tagged for every update, and specify if you're okay with NSFW posts or not, please mention it in the comments below ty ❤

Chapter 15: Shadows Fall

You numbly sat down on your bed. The room was dark. Your Phoenix brand, silent, a dull sepia stain on your inner wrist.

It hurts a lot.

“He’s no different to the power hungry elders of this corrupt society after all huh.” You were disappointed. It was dumb of you to give your heart away to him. Especially to a man who was already planning on taking in concubines, this early into your “relationship”.

You checked your phone to see the notifications. Mai and Miwa were looking for you, saying that you have dinner out with them in a few minutes.

'Ah, that was supposed to be for tonight' you thought.

"Sorry can't go, feeling unwell. You guys go ahead." You texted back to them as you slumped on your bed.

After a few minutes your door slammed open. "Where have you been?!" Mai asked, but stopped talking upon seeing your red rimmed eyes. Miwa peeked out behind her. "Are you okay y/n?" She asked.

That question absolutely crushed you. You started sobbing again, not being able to hide your shaking shoulders. The two girls filed in and closed your door.

"We are ordering take out. Miwa go ahead and cancel that reservation. We will stay in tonight." Mai said. "Right!" Miwa worriedly replied as she pulled out her phone and made the call.

"I'm not here to baby you. You will tell me what happened, okay?" Mai demanded.

"I need a few minutes" everything looked so blurry through your tears, Mai and Miwa only looked like unfocused blobs of dark green and bright blue. Literally, the only way you could distinguish the two girls at this point was by their hair color.

They couldn't get much out of you other than you talking about how Kamo-san never liked you in the first place and how you pushed yourself onto him.

The girls held you as you cried. They couldn't believe what they were hearing. "But both of you looked great. I'm sure Kamo senpai really liked you though?" Miwa questioned out loud.

Mai just nodded her head. "I said it before already. Both of you act like you're so oblivious to each other's affections. But I do agree that you put more effort into the relationship. He always turns down your request for dates off campus. Even an outsider could see that."

"No, no it’s not that. You guys know how the big 3 clans operate. He just felt that I was a suitable wife to bear his heirs. They're jumping at the chance to use me to get a blood-manipulator jujutsu shi who may also possibly inherit my psychokinesis technique. I don't want to stay in a relationship without any love in it." You whispered.

Your voice was all gone after you sobbed for hours. The fight and energy just drained out of your body.

They couldn't say anything to that as it was your relationship with Kamo and not theirs. That night, they slept over in your room, the three of you squishing into your queen sized bed and plushies.

◇◇◇

On the other hand, Noritoshi had woken up from his nap, bedhead and red rimmed eyes and all. Clearly remembering all your painful words. He looked over to the side, staring at the Jade dragon pendant atop his bedside table. A small pink letter resting beside it, one that you had given him days prior.

‘Dearest Toshi,

You must be exhausted from all of your extra tasks given to you by your clan as of the late. I hope that it gets better soon, I’m here if ever you want to talk about it or if you need any help with that. My family and I are open to supporting you in your endeavors, though you haven't met them yet. Hiroki nii is especially excited to meet you, I can already see the both of you getting along quite well. Whenever you’re ready <3

Have a good evening.

Love, Y/N.’

He felt tears burn behind his eyelids.

“It was too sudden, I couldn’t even understand half the things she said to me earlier,” he murmured to himself. He racked his brain, trying to recall the things you said. It was mostly a blur to him.

Something about what he and his father talked about yesterday. That wasn’t an issue, it was mostly clan duties as per usual.

Also, how he never liked you. Well, he hasn’t confessed yet, but he couldn’t see why you’d bring that up out of nowhere when everything was still fine 2 days ago.

Concubines. The talk on concubines. Why did you- Oh. “... from yesterday” Noritoshi’s head was getting clearer and clearer. You must have misunderstood the conversation he had with his father, and left before it finished. It didn’t sound pretty now that he thought of it.

He had that single-minded goal of pleasing his father and the elders, but somehow you got tangled in the mess.

He sighed frustratedly. It always seemed to be the case with you jumping conclusions about him, didn’t it? Now he has to clear it up with you before it gets too bad.

◇◇◇

You woke up the next morning feeling and looking like utter shit. Mai and Miwa had to dress you up and drag you out of bed.

“There’s only one thing you can do now Y/N.” Mai said as she straightened out your collar. “Get over him.”

Huh. Easier said than done.

◇◇◇

There was a drastic change in your behaviour towards Noritoshi. The name "Noritoshi-senpai", that you had always cheerily called out, was replaced by a short and curt "Kamo-san" whenever conversation was necessary. Also, you don’t look into his eyes anymore.

You avoided him as much as you can, thanking yourself for knowing his schedule so well. Not hesitating to turn and go around in another direction if you ever saw him approaching from a distance. Because of this he rarely sees you on campus.

It hurt Noritoshi badly to see you act this way. He never realized just how warm you were with him until now that it was all gone. He tried to catch you during your breaks, calling out your name with the same tenderness he always had. But it was in vain as you ran away from him.

Todo and Momo wisely chose not to make any snide comments, upon seeing how downhearted Noritoshi was in the following days.

Everybody avoided eye contact with both of you if and when you had to interact. It couldn't be helped. The tension was like a fine piece of glass waiting to shatter.

The pain in your heart didn't subside at all. You've taken to staring at the mark on your wrist.

'Did I successfully reject our bond?' You wondered hollowly.

Sometimes you half expect your mark to start flashing wildly, like whenever you and Noritoshi have off days with each other. But this is the first time you've seen it so… silent.

You wrapped it up with more darker velvet strips and ignored it.

It was the opposite on Noritoshi’s end. He would lie in bed and stare at the mark that is dangerously bright red and hot. It almost felt painful, like someone was searing a brand onto his skin.

He wrapped it up in gauze bandages and put salves to soothe the mark. But it was never enough. He needed you back.

◇◇◇

During one afternoon, you just finished an English lesson with one of the windows who teaches at Jujutsu High. You stood up from your desk and turned to see the man outside of your classroom.

"Y/n, are you free for lunch?" Noritoshi had obviously sprinted as soon as his lessons had ended. “We need to talk.” All 4 of you looked up to see him outside the classroom, as composed as ever. But he looked terrible.

There were shadows under his eyes, and he seemed to have gotten thinner. The shitty side of you was cruelly happy. Good that he’s like this, because he lost his toy. Good on him. But your heart was sad, yelling at you to go back and take care of him already.

"Ah I'm sorry, but I've got lunch with the rest of the 1st year's here." You politely declined. Trying to school your face into a neutral expression.

"I insist." He firmly stated. He looked over to the other students. "You don't mind if I borrow her do you?"

You inwardly scoffed at his poor choice of words. The stupid arse still thinks I'm his belonging apparently. Something to be borrowed and used.

But Mai stepped up. "If she doesn't want to hang out with you then she doesn't." Miwa was fidgeting worriedly. "Now now." She started.

"I really wanted to have lunch with my fellow 1st years, if you could please excuse us Kamo San." You hastily uttered, pulling Mai's arms towards you while turning away. The other first years followed your lead.

But Noritoshi was determined. He quickly put his hand on your shoulder, only for you to slap it away and flinch from him. Everybody froze.

You were clearly trembling, which made Noritoshi lower his hand and step back. "I'm sorry y/n." Whether the apology was for holding you without your consent or for everything that happened, you painfully let it slide. Silently bowing to him, then quickly walking away with the others.

Noritoshi could only watch wistfully as your figure disappeared from his view.

◇◇◇

"The nerve of shitty men," Mai angrily stuffed her mouth with eggs from her bento. "Thinking they own women, that they're better than us. It was like this with the men in my family as well. Bullying and kicking aside the weaker women."

You sadly poked at your food. It was katsudon. You ordered it ahead of time from the cafeteria, wanting to perk up with a favorite dish. But today it tastes so bland. It wasn't the cooking that was off. Just that you had no appetite.

"Wouldn't you want to talk it out with Kamo senpai, y/n?" Miwa asked. Truth be told you were adding fire to the problem. You just dumped your anger on Noritoshi and kept rudely cutting him off before leaving him.

But your pride and broken heart didn't allow you to go back to him. "I don't think there's anything left for me to say or do to be honest. I'm not in the mood to face him. At all." You lied.

Mechamaru surprisingly spoke out, "Love is a fickle thing. And it's a fact that women are more in tune with their emotions than men are. But I think you won't regret it if you give him a chance. Kamo Noritoshi isn't a bad man."

Mai huffed. "Whose side are you even on?"

"There are no sides. Just two idiots who are madly in love with each other." Mechamaru dryly replied.

Your heart clenched, but you stayed silent, not denying the fact that even after you pushed him away, you still loved him.

"Let's talk about something else shall we?" Miwa hurriedly changed the topic and started discussing the homework to be done.

◇◇◇

Hiroki was both the best and the worst brother you could ask for. Because he chose this time to surprise you with a visit at Kyoto High, claiming he wanted to see how you were doing with classes and that he would stay for a while.

Secretly, he wanted to meet and gauge Noritoshi, only to find out that the both of you have just broken up. You brought him into your dorm room to have a chat and some snacks.

“WHA?! YOU- You ended things with your soulmate?! You were together for like what?! 4 Months?” His jaw dropped as you told him the entire story.

You gave a drawn out sigh. “Hiro nii, I’m done. Like… He… I dunno anymore. To be honest I broke up with him in the heat of the moment.”

“Tsk, you’ve always been led by your emotions. That’s why you’re so reckless half the time sis. You didn’t even try to talk it out with him.” He asked as he opened a bag of chips.

You stayed silent and reached for chips. Chewing and ignoring him.

“What’s with you and bottling all your pent up anger only to toss it onto the poor guy? Didn’t even give him a chance to explain himself.” he tutted.

You whirled on him angrily. “They just want me for my power. Then they’ll let him off with like a dozen women around him. What the fuck is there for him to explain?!”

Hiroki looked way too calm. “Who are 'they'?”

You paused. “The Kamo family.”

“Are you 100% sure Noritoshi was in this only to use you?”

“Like 99.99%...” you trailed off. Hiroki eyed you knowingly. “That 0.01 percent chance of him loving you. You considered it, even though that’s a small ass probability sis. But hey, that’s your man. If you want him out, our family’s got your back. I’ll beat him up for you if you need me to”

You shook your head at him.

Hiroki sighed, “Though with that concubine thing, I can see it happenin’. Clan heads are desperate to have a son with the inherited technique. The Gojo clan just got lucky with Satoru. We dunno if it’s normal in the Kamo clan though. But with you as his soulmate, he shouldn’t need any. Somethin ain’t addin up…” He got lost in thought.

“You won’t know until you talk with Kamo himself.”

You sadly continued eating your chips. “I hate it when you’re right.”

◇◇◇

The next morning Utahime urgently called for a full student body plus all available jujutsu sorcerers on site for a meeting.

You and Hiroki stumbled into the room, almost late, pushing against each other. The other students looked curiously at the man who was fighting you for space on the couch.

You jabbed him in the gut and put a leg over his. “Uhhhh y/n who is that?” Mai asked.

Your cousin shrugged your leg off of his, stood up and said his greetings, “Hello, I am Tsuchimikado Hiroki. Alumni here at Kyoto Jujutsu High. Semi-grade 1 sorcerer. Pleased to meet you all and thanks for taking care of my lil sis- ah I mean cousin.”

“Ohhhh” Miwa took a closer look. You noticed Noritoshi glancing over at you. Todo walked up to him and pointed a finger, “Tsuchi’s relative? Then what woman is your idea-”

You used your technique to immobilise Todo and forced him to sit down in a daze. “Sorry for my rudeness, senpai. You can have that convo later.” You knew it would take too long if this starts again.

Hiroki looked affronted, “It’s rude to point bruh.”

Utahime clapped her hands to gather your attention as Principal Gakuganji appeared on the podium.

“Thank you so much all for coming into this meeting on such short notice. Especially to the alumni and other available Jujutsu sorcerers. Let's get straight to the point: I am here to announce that War is coming.”

Blood Bound: Table of Contents

[fullmoonremus]

Paper Cut | Edmund Pevensie x Reader Soulmate AU

Warnings: Mentions of injury/blood, describing pain, seemingly near-death experience and talk about death, probably some cussing

Time/Era: Modern AU but the Pevensies have been to Narnia. 

Word Count: 2.4k

Summary: Every injury your soulmate receives, you also receive. When you finally meet your soulmate, you have a few bones to pick. 

A/N: Hello! This is the first imagine I’ve written on this blog, so I decided to do something a little more light-hearted for our favorite just king. I’m also a sucker for soulmate aus. There will be a part 2 for this story :D Feel free to leave requests :) Also, I’ve never been to Cambridge University so please take everything I say about it with a grain of salt lol

Part 2 | Part 3 | masterlist | read on ao3

It’s a common courtesy to try and be as careful as you can when it comes to your body. Not for your sake, but for your soulmate’s. Every papercut, cramp, broken bone, and even every itch you feel, your other half does as well. So, it was common sense to try to be as careful as you could to not inflict pain on them. Or at least that’s what Y/N thought. She spent her whole life dodging anything she felt could cause her harm. This included “normal kid” things like playing on the playground, rolling down hills, jumping off things, or playing sports. Her heart was always in the right place, even if her friends and family called her a stick in the mud for declining their “fun” requests. She could not, and will not, injure her person. When she was around 8, she had been playing with a paper airplane and it just barely sliced her finger. It left behind a pesky papercut that stung. Bad. The small injury left Y/N guilty for days afterward. She has assumed that her soulmate was on the same page as her for the longest time. Aside from a few skinned knees (they were kids after all,) Y/N was left unscathed. She went on her days carefree until she was about fifteen. 

It seemed as though Y/N’s soulmate had completely changed their deminer overnight. It started with a bit of road rash on her palms. Y/N assumed they had fallen accidentally. Annoying, sure, but it was more than manageable. Then, her lip split open and bled for almost 15 minutes. 

As the week went on, large bruises started appearing on her legs and hips. Maybe the road rash fall was worse than she initially thought. Again, she just rode it off as clumsiness. It wasn’t long until her fingertips started to turn purple. This made Y/N panic. 

“Ma’am?” Y/N interrupted her science teacher in the middle of her lecture, “I think there’s something wrong with my hands.” The purple started to spread down her fingers towards her knuckles. They also proved to be getting harder to move. 

“Oh, dear, you’re freezing.” Ms. Adamson remarks, taking Y/N’s hands into her own. 

“What’s happening? Am I dying?” Her entire hand was now numb. 

“I don’t think so, Miss L/N, but, it’ll help you and them out if we warm you up.” 

Her toes suffered the same fate, she discovered during a visit to the school’s infirmary. (Which wasn’t even worth visiting in Y/N’s opinion.) The nurse at Y/N’s school didn’t have the “jurisdiction” to help Y/N properly, so she had to settle for a wet paper towel that was warmed in the microwave. Y/N just wished to be sent home instead. By the time she was finally set free, the purple had faded but her skin tone was not back to normal. Hopefully, the paper towel did something for her soulmate cause this sure as hell wasn’t Y/N’s fault. Her parents were flabbergasted when she got home, mostly upset that they made her miss so many of her classes. Neither had any explanation but tried to offer unhelpful comforting all the same. 

When Y/N awoke the next morning, all of the fingers in her hand had gone back to normal and she regained feeling. Finally, her soulmate was finally safe. 

She spent the day coming up with ridiculous reasons as to why they had almost given her frostbite. Maybe they got locked in a freezer at an ice cream store and had to wait for the store to reopen to let them out. Maybe they live in Antarctica and they got locked out of their house in their underwear. Maybe they were trying to win a bet to see who could stay in ice water the longest. The daydreams were cut short as she was harshly awoken by a searing pain in her abdomen. 

Ms. Adamson dropped her whiteboard marker and panicked when she heard Y/N scream. It wasn’t a normal teenage girl scream either. No, this scream was filled with pure agony and distress. It echoed against the walls and vibrated the desks. It sounded as if she was getting murdered. Y/N fell to the floor and landed in a big heap. The scientist hurriedly ran towards Y/N and stopped dead in her tracks when she saw the teen’s blood pooling on the linoleum floor. It appeared she had been stabbed, by the looks of it.

Pointing at various other students to do various tasks, call an ambulance, call the office, and to go get another teacher, she took hold of Y/N’s hand. 

“It’s going to be okay,” She whispered, “You’re going to be fine. Keep your eyes open for me.”

Y/N felt very odd. Was this what dying felt like? She felt as though she was underwater; she could hear Ms. Adamson but her voice was muffled and she couldn’t make anything out. Y/N felt dizzy and sick at the same time, all she wanted to do was shut her eyes. So she did. Relief filled her as quickly as the pain. Her wound felt cold as if someone was pushing a damp cloth onto it. The pain lessened and lessened until there was none at all. 

~

Five years later she had almost forgotten about what had happened. Almost. In the years that followed the incident, severe gashes and bruises had become a normal occurrence. Her body was riddled with what seemed like battle scars, and she was almost always on edge. She had no way of knowing what was going to happen to her, nor when it was going to happen. This felt really unfair. She had been so careful for them, but they treated themself like a rag doll. 

Much to her delight, when she hit eighteen all of the injuries suddenly stopped. The last injury she had received was a dark black bruise that covered her entire side, then nothing. It had been two years and all she got were papercuts and burned tongues. 

“Take a break,” Y/N’s roommate grabs the pen out of her hand and places it on the desk. “You’ve been working on that for ages, come get coffee with me.” 

Y/N was currently in her third year at Cambridge University, working on her undergraduate biology degree. For her degree, she had to take organic chemistry and it was, in simple terms, kicking her ass. Her professor is shitty, the work was hard and Y/N was losing motivation. 

“I can’t. If I stop I’ll fail the final, then fail the class then never graduate.” Y/N mumbles, picking up her pen again and scribbling something down. 

“That’s not true, just come with me. Please?” “I said no, Y/B/F/N.”

“What if you take your books with you? A change of environment might help you study.”

Y/N leans back in her chair and looks up at her roommate. Maybe she had a point, it might do her good to get out a little bit. She packs her things and the two make their way to the coffee shop. 

The coffee shop on campus was small and always packed. The school preferred to call it “cozy,” but still, it’s small. Surprisingly, there weren’t many people inside. 

“Most people must’ve already left campus for break,” Y/B/F/N said, seemingly reading your mind. 

Only three of the tables had students sitting at them. One in the far corner had a girl who looked to be a very frustrated first year, huddled over a croissant and an English textbook. A few tables down sat four boys and one girl. Each had books open and pens in their hands, but by picking up snippets of their conversation, they were talking about whether Voldemort or Darth Vader would win in a fight. Finally, near the window, sat a boy who was staring straight at her. She recognized him from a few of her general education classes. Y/N had never talked to this boy, but he was rather cute. He was wearing a crimson sweater and ripped jeans with converse, hair messily tossed to the side. Y/N couldn’t decide whether or not he was staring at her or was in a very deep thought so she waved. No wave back. 

The two girls get their coffee and sit down a few tables away from the boy. 

“Do you know that guy?” Y/B/F/N asks, moving her head towards crimson sweater. 

“Not officially, I recognize him. Oh, what’s his name? I knew it at one point…” Y/N reaches into her bag and pulls out her books again, placing them on the table. As if it were a habit, she immediately starts studying again. She glances past her friend; the guy was still staring at that one spot. 

Time passes fast for Y/N but slow for Y/B/F/N. She tried to speak with you but ultimately gave up. So, bidding you goodbye, she left to go find her boyfriend. Y/N was kind of relieved, she can finally study in peace. The big group also left, after fighting about whether a time turner should be illegal or not, so the cafe was left with an almost eery silence. So silent that you can hear every pencil scratch, every tap of a keyboard, and every gulp of coffee. 

At some point, the boy had gotten up to get another cup of coffee and passed by Y/N. He was wearing a shit ton of cologne, so he left a scent trail wherever he went. Making his way back to his table, he tripped and spilled his coffee all over Y/N’s chemistry notes. 

“No, no, no, no, no!!!!!” Y/N screeches, wiping away the coffee with her bare hands. The drink splashes onto the boy’s pants and shoes. 

“Oh as- oh fuck, I am so sorry!” He grabs a wad of napkins and tries to blot the paper. She had worked on that study guide for hours, and now it was ruined. There was no way her professor would take it now. Thank god her laptop was still in her bag. 

Panicked, Y/N picks up her notebook and starts flipping through it. Her pen marks were bleeding together and there was no way to save them. Coffee crimson boy grimaces and picks up the notebook. 

“I don’t suppose this was an art class and you could turn it in as an abstract piece?” He says in a serious tone, though the words were highly sarcastic. Y/N lets out a single laugh. 

“I wish it were, but no. O Chem,” Coffee crimson’s face contorts even more. 

“Ouch, um, do you have it backed up anywhere?”

“Ah yes, I have my notebook backed up.” The previously broken ice was discarded and Y/N was frustrated again. 

“You should have done it on your laptop.”

“And you should watch where the fuck you’re going.” Y/N snatches the notebook from his hand. Coffee crimson notices your tone and quickly backtracks. 

“Hey, let me redo it for you then,” He glances at the textbook casually. “I’m sure I can figure it out.”

“And why should I trust you? I don’t know you and my grade is riding on this.”

“Okay, that’s fair,” His smile was warm. “I’m Edmund Pevensie, I’m in the prelaw program.” 

“Oh, perfect, a law student that’s going to attempt my organic chemistry homework. Wonder what could go wrong.” 

“I’m sure I can figure it out. Law is hard, maybe a different kind of hard, but still hard. I can do hard.” 

“Take a shot every time sweater guy says hard. I feel like I’m at a frat party.”

“I’m trying to fix my mistake here,” Now Edmund is the one that looks frustrated. “Here, take my number. I’ll text you updates and meet you back here tomorrow.” He looks at the clock. Damn, he had a gorgeous jawline. “4:32 pm. Exactly 24 hours from now.” Edmund scribbles his number onto a napkin and hands it to Y/N. As he writes, she can’t help but notice a long, jagged scar running the back of his hand. She scrunchs her eyebrows. 

~

Edmund actually kept his word. Every hour until four am that night he sent Y/N updates. Goofy pictures of him googling stupid questions or him writing. He sent a video that gave Y/N a perfect shot of the scar. Curiously, Y/N looks down at her own hand. 

The next day, his photo updates started coming again. This time they were more serious, showing the study guide. He ended up putting his own commentary in the margins; some funny some that made her think of the material differently. Y/N could really tell he was smart, even by his handwriting. 

He sent a picture to Y/N at 4:25 of the table in the coffee shop. “I’m early” was sent at the exact moment Y/N opened the door. 

“Wow, I’m impressed. I didn’t actually think you’d show.” Y/N sat opposite of him and smiled. He was wearing the same (coffee stained) jeans as yesterday and a button-up shirt. 

“I wouldn’t do all that work for nothing,” He smiled again and handed Y/N a new notebook she had never seen before. 

As she gripped the pages, the corner dug into her palm and cut her. 

“Ow!” The two said at the same time. They both had a thin cut in the middle of their palms. His large brown eyes met Y/N’s and they stared for a moment. Y/N then grabbed his hand and pushed up his sleeve to show the scar going up the back of his hand. Y/N couldn’t look away from his skin; just as she had thought, it was identical to hers. 

Meeting his gaze again, she pressed a hand to her stomach. Her hand rested right above a large, jagged scar that didn’t seem to heal quite right. His eyes followed the line of her arm.

“Edmund, I think you have a lot of explaining to do.”

[nsfwsportsanimebabes]

S/O with the best vibes headcanons

Description: can I request kuroo, and the Miya twins w a fem s/o or crush (whichever u want:3) who’s room has just like the most chill vibes, like they have a record player, lots of plants, books, fairy lights, and a cute colour theme that they just adore. Maybe like their first time coming to visit & staying till 2am cause it’s just so welcoming and calm?

Requested: YESSSS OF COURSEEEE🥺🥺🥺 this is so pure and I’m excited to get these hashed out for you🥺🥺🥺 honestly both your admins HARDCORE relate to these vibes. Like we both have these things scattered between our apartments. So you’re really pulling on some great vibes here. I’ll try not to go too overboard 😉☺️

A/N: soooo uhhh. I’m not dead.. lolol. Just kinda reallyyyyy lost any motivation to write for not only this blog, but any writing in general honestly. BUT this blog is still kicking, we do still take requests in, and love seeing them. I plan on doing a few more requests and/or WIPS that motivation comes for. 

Also..I apologize if Osamu’s isn’t the greatest, I did his first and this is the first scenario type post I have done in a longgggggggg time. But regardless hope you all enjoy! ~Admin Crow 💚

Miya Osamu

“and if you push this button on the remote you can totally change the colors to the lights too. Pretty neat right?”

To be honest, Osamu didn’t hear much of your explanation of all the things in your room. Mostly because he was overwhelmed by the pure vibes coming from your room. He was a little surprised that you had invited him over to study. You two hadn’t been dating for very long, so inviting him over to study, in your bedroom no less, had taken him by surprise. But of course curiosity got the best of Samu, so he wasn’t about to turn down this opportunity. Looking around, he noticed the way your lights were set up to give off whatever color you wanted to hit every corner of the room. And how your cute little starter plants overtook your dresser. Candles of specific colors adorned your bookshelf where you had organized them by color to match an obvious theme you were going for. Osamu especially enjoyed the record player that had music softly playing; the record turning slowly to match the music coming out of it. He’d have to investigate your books and records later when you showed him your favorite ones. 

He took in the way your lights had pictures hanging from them, most of them were pictures you had taken with your friends. But he noticed the corner by your bed had ones the two of you had taken together. For some reason Osamu found that really sweet. 

“Samu? Did you here me? Hello, earth to Osamu.” you called out, trying to gain the attention of your boyfriend, who had been staring at your fairy lights after taking in your room for a solid 3 minutes without looking or acknowledging you comments. You were nervous about what his response to your room would be. The way you decorated your room was in a way that really showed who you were, and you didn’t want to just share that with anyone. 

Osamu finally realized you were calling him and turned to look at you with a lazy smile noticing your slightly guarded look and could tell you were waiting for a response. “Come here F/n, there’s no reason to be anxious, I totally think your set up is amazing. Show me more?” 

Miya Atsumu

 “You have so many books F/N! How the hell do you afford all of these!?” Atsumu had never seen so many books outside of a library in his life. The fact that you had two full size, five shelf book shelves in your room side by side. Each bookshelf adorned with rows and stacks of books taking up every possible space that you could cram a book into. 

You rubbed the back of your head blushing slightly “well....I found most of them at bookstores, thrift stores, sales, friends and family who gave them as gifts...” you rambled, not sure what his response would be. 

Atsumu ran to another corner of your room immediately starting to flip through your almost equally impressive stack of records. When you had invited Atsumu over to work on a school paper together, you didn’t know what his thoughts of your room would be. Even though you two had been best friends since you were 6, he had yet to been inside your room. Although your locker at school had a lot of similar vibes as your room, a few mini plants you had snuck into school were on the top shelf, pictures adorning your locker door, and other things gave Atsumu an idea of your inner vibes. 

It was something he really loved about you. He would be lying if he didn’t admit that he was dying to see what your room looked like. Any chance to get closer to you was really his end goal. I mean, he’s been trying to go over to your place for years to be shot down every time. But the opportunity had finally arrived and you had caved, finally allowing him the opportunity into your private life. 

“Hey F/N, got any secret journals hidden amongst all of these books full of secrets you haven’t shared with me?” he teased going back to the books scattered over your desk. 

Sighing, you sunk into your corner of comfy, plushy bean bag pillows and called for him to join you “Knock it off Tsumu, get over here and sit down so we can work on this paper please?” 

Atsumu took one look at the comfy looking pile before taking three long strides and plopping down onto the one next to you, jostling you and your laptop in the process. “I could really get used to hanging out here F/N. I say we start having movie nights at your place. In fact, let’s just do everything over here from now on.”

“Don’t push your luck there Tsumu.”

Kuroo Tetsurou

“can I choose the next record F/N?” 

Looking up from your sketchbook, you noticed your boyfriend looking over at you with a lazy look. To be honest, he looked completely at home, fitting in with the glow of the fairy lights that you had dimmed just enough to allow you guys to see what you were doing. 

Kuroo had been surprised when you suggested doing homework together at your house, since his room was the usual hang out spot, unless you chose to be outside in nice weather. It’s not that he didn’t think you didn’t want him in your room, he was just usually the first to suggest studying over at his place. 

But seeing the way your room just gave off vibes that were purely, you, had Kuroo ready to study and hang out here all the time. He found your room a chill environment, but still productive enough that he wasn’t wasting his time studying. He had particularly enjoyed flipping through your pile of records, and naming off fun facts of all the cute plants you had scattered in perfect places in your room to capture the sunlight. 

You nodded at Kuroo’s question, returning to your sketchbook, immediately getting lost in the drawing you were working on for class again. A few minutes later you recognized the soft melody of your and Kuroo’s favorite song coming from the record player. Suddenly two strong, volleyball and chemistry note taking worn, hands gently took your pencil and sketchbook from you. Setting them down next to you before pulling you to your feet and into your dorky boyfriend’s arms. 

“Tetsu you cannot dance for your life. What are we doing?” you laughed, letting him pull you close and swaying with him. 

“I can’t dance?! Excuse me have you not seen the grace and beauty that I have on the volleyball court? What makes you think I can’t use that to dance with my beautiful girlfriend?” he defended, although you both knew you were right. 

Laughing you took control, despite the obvious difference in sizes between you two, and spun under his arm, enjoying the quick way he caught himself from tripping. Whether the two of you could dance or not, it didn’t matter. Spending this time with Kuroo was like the world had stopped moving around you. If you could spend forever here in his arms in your room forever you certainly would. 

Although it wouldn’t be spent dancing as Kuroo ruined that moment by throwing you over his shoulder and flopping down on your bed deciding it was time for cuddles while enjoying the rest of your album playing your favorite songs. The two of you laughing and sharing special secret moments that would stay inside your four bedroom walls for eternity. 

[docstark]

Ignite (Avengers/Bucky Barnes Fanfiction) Chapter 1 - Everyone Has a Beginning

Hello!

I am going to start off with a little sidenote before we get started here. I started this as a side blog so it is not my usual writings (I usually write kpop ff) but I have been feeling the Marvel writing vibes lately so thought that I would put myself out there with what I've had in my google docs so please be kind.

Also, I appreciate constructive critisism, it helps me write and mold my characters/ideas and I also just love hearing what you think. I'm a bit rusty right now with my writing and there may be times where things aren't consistant with updates cause I'm getting back into school soon, but here we go!

Sincerly, Doctor Stark

Oh, I almost forgot...

If you have seen SHIELD you know who AIDA is but in this story she is the equialent of FRIDAY.

Also you'll see that my OC has the same power as Quake/Daisy Johnson because I was like "WHAT POWER COULD MY CHARACTER POSSIBLY HAVE?!"

N/N = Nickname

Warnings: None...some language?

"AIDA, if anyone calls please just send it to voicemail...I really don't want to hear from the New York Times for the...." I stopped as I set my keys on my kitchen island, "AIDA?"

"Doctor Stark, it seems that my security protocols have been over run," AIDA finally replied, "I tried contacting you but it seems that he has also managed to cut into my communications."

By now I had noticed the figure that was sitting on my couch and I cautiously approached my living room like I was entering the room with a wild animal.

"Should I try to see if I can get through to Mr. Stark," AIDA questioned.

"No," I said as I finally made eye contact with the man on the couch, "He came all this way instead of fleaing the country immediatly...he has questions. You won't hurt me, will you Bucky?"

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Let me back up for a moment and introduce myself, my name is Y/F/N M.I. Stark aka N/N Stark better known as Doctor Stark. For the longest time I was just Howard Stark’s genius daughter who people barely remembered existed. I rather liked it that way though, while Tony spent his time in California soaking up the sun, partying, sleeping around, getting kidnapped for 3 months, doing some work on the side, and now becoming Iron Man (have no idea how Pepper does it)...I spend my time in New York between working at Stark Tower and doing some side consulting in DC and some...other business that takes place during my consulting. But other than that, I tend to stay in the shadows. Well, I used to be able to stay in the shadows. Then of course Tony decided that be would become Iron Man and I become someone that everyone had questions for but they weren’t going to get answers from.

Currently I live in New York just outside the city which has its perks; I have a decent sized house customized for my own needs, a yard, a pool, a fence (iron with perimeter security), a gate for my driveway, and neighbors that I can chat with.

You know, feel normal even if it’s just for 5 minutes.

Downfall is the commute. But since I am one of the owners of the company, being a little late isn’t that big of a deal for me unless I had something planned.

Now, even though Tony was Iron Man I couldn’t blame him completely for all the calls I get now. Now after the powers that I now have had been seen during the whole drone fiasco at Stark Expo. And that is something that should really be explained...

------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Ever heard of an Agent Peggy Carter? She’s a wonderful woman and a close family friend, so close in fact that growing up I started to call her Aunt Peggy; after my parents died and Tony just about completely separated himself from the fact that he had a little sister who was 15 and in college, I could always count on Aunt Peggy when I needed someone to talk to. But as we know, a good Agent keeps her secrets and only reveals them when the time is right.

By the time I turned 21 I had completed my PhD in biomedical engineering and electrical and computer science as well as a doctorate in biochemistry (7 years of college and sleepless nights, taking more classes than I probably should have, but I did it). At the time I was just getting myself acquainted to my new office space at Stark Tower (during that time I only occupied the 80th floor) and my research and projects at a slow pace.

“Don’t feel like you have to run,” Tony said only half paying attention to me, “Start slow, you know Stark Industries just as well as anyone, you’ll be running the tower before you know it.”

I had to admit that he was right; I had been in Stark Tower thousands of times it seemed but this was new for me. But then Aunt Peggy came along and gave me that extra push that I needed.

She had said she had an office warming gift for me; what I wasn’t expecting was the almost 30 boxes of old files, some dating as far back as 1939.

“Your father was a great man, a fool at times, but a great man,” she started, “Throughout his career as both the founder Stark Industries and of SHIELD, meticulously hid his files and personal work in different places. He once told me and Edwin Jarvis the location of all the information and who to give it to should something ever happen to him.”

“Shouldn’t this be going to Tony then?” I questioned, “If this is his work then-“

She held up her hand and I stopped, letting her continue. “I remember one very particular evening when your parents had invited me out for dinner. You had just gone off to college...his little girl.”

I snorted trying to imagine my father gushing over his kids like any regular dad would and in my head it just wasn’t happening.

“He didn’t show a lot of emotion because he wanted you two to be able to face the world as it is...but for him it was hard seeing his little girl off to college even earlier than most dads would. But we did have a conversation that leads to the elephant...or should I say boxes in the room,” she said as she walked over towards them, “He said that both his children were born protégées, both were born to carry on what he had started. However, while they both possess the talents to change the world, one is more so the leader and the other the backbone.”

She opened the box in front of her that had a large ‘(Your Initials)’ written on the front of it. “He said, First born or not, had he not felt like Tony had the potential to lead, you would have become the head of Stark Industries,” she said, pulling a book from the box and holding it out to me, “Your father believed that you are the backbone to the very company that you stand in today, which is why I am now giving you these, just as he asked...keep them safe.”

And in Aunt Peggy style she left me to soak in the information that she had just told me, and to move the boxes to a room that only I could get into. I spent every waking moment going through the boxes, sorting them, trying to find what had gone wrong to make him tuck certain things away.

I found some items that I wondered why he even kept. Was it a reminder not to mess with it? A way for someone to know what to do should they see one? I didn’t know but it was staying under lock and key, that was for sure.

The book that Aunt Peggy had given me was essentially a journal, maybe even a diary, whatever you want to call it, it held the detail of things that had gone wrong, things that had gone right, and the one that she had given me wasn’t the only one. In the same box with my initials were more journals, just like the rest and there were almost 3 exclusively for Project Rebirth…

I don’t know how long I went through the boxes labeled ‘Project Rebirth’. The story of Steve Rogers, of Captain America was regular bedtime story for me.

My mother once said I should stop asking him for Captain America stories and at 5 years old it was the first time I had really seen my father get defensive about anything.

“If she wants to hear those stories then I will tell them, Maria,” he said.

But reading how long he searched the frigid waters, hoping for a signal to find his friend, I now know the look I saw behind my father’s eyes...sadness and grief.

For a time I stepped away from my file room, my workload getting heavy, ideas that my father thought of being brought to life but in a new and better way. As my projects expanded, my need for space grew, and to everyone’s surprise I now took up 5 floors in just five years, and with lab assistants and AIDA to help with the calls, I got a chance to finally step back into my file room.

I had barely touched the files over the last 5 years, but what I can say is that there was one box that I was avoiding. It was a wooden box, nothing intricate about it. It almost reminded me of my mother’s old jewelry box, a gift passed down in her family. But this box was odd. There was no mention of it in any of the journals, no note, nothing.

So I had to take my life into my own hands at that point and I carefully opened the box. When I opened it I gave a sigh of relief. Carefully cradled in the box was a vile of purple liquid, and of course, now that I have gotten past a close call with a heart attack, I found a note...taped to the inside of the lid.

“Out of the many things that I have come across in my time...blah blah blah speech about his accolades...while Dr. Abraham Erskine created the Super Soldier Serum for Project Rebirth, it was not the only serum that he created. The Terrigenesis Serum was created to react with the body’s own DNA and essentially bring forward any supernatural abilities that might be laying dormant within someone, should they have them.”

I stopped and ran my hand through my hair. They didn’t know when to stop, did they?

“Should you find this one of 2 things can be done; hide it or take it to SHIELD and only if they know what A21K609S means, are they to know about what you have….I suggest you start with the top.”

For the longest time I hid the Terrigenesis Serum, we didn’t need someone with superpowers who might be unhinged, running around.

But after I had started consulting with SHIELD for a few years and when Tony got kidnapped...my emotions got the better of me.

And I went to Fury…

He knew what the code meant, he questioned me over and over again telling me that there was a chance that I could die.

“IF YOU DON'T HAVE SOMEONE DO IT I'LL DO IT MYSELF!” I remember screeching at him.

I was taken to a lab and strapped down on the bed, since no one knew how the serum would affect me, on the screen of one of the computers I saw that Fury had pulled up the old file that SHIELD had on the serum.

I remember seeing Natasha up in the observation room looking down at me. By then we had become friends and by the look on her face I could tell that she did not approve of this.

But it was too late now…

The purple liquid traveled into my body, making me feel like every vein and artery was being shredded as it circulated. I couldn’t even tell if I was screaming, I knew my mouth was open but I could hear nothing.

I felt hands on me as the lab assistants and doctor who had been permitted in the room tried to push me back flat on the bed but there was this loud bass like noise and the hands were gone and everything went black.

When I woke up a few hours later the only person in the room with me was Fury.

“What’s this thing around me?” I asked looking purple, glowing substance around me.

Fury took a pen and threw it at the substance and it bounced back. “Some sort of shield that surrounded you after the serum took hold in your body...I suggest you try and figure out how to make it go away.”

Closing my eyes I tried to tell the shield that I was fine, I was safe, and that it could come back to me. It took a good hour but I figured it out and finally Fury was able to undo the straps that were holding me down to the table.

“So what? I’m some sort of human shield?” I questioned as a lab assistant came into the room and cautiously lifted the head of the bed up so that I could sit up. I finally got a good look at the room; equipment was knock over and strewn around the room, there was broken glass in the observation windows, and there were cracks in the walls. I gulped upon seeing this. “Did I do all this?”

“Vibration manipulation,” he replied, “Congrats Doc, you created a small earthquake right here in this lab. Not to mention you scared the hell out of the SHIELD science division when they got blasted back from that force field. But either way...looks like we have some work to do.”

TO BE CONTINUED...

Next Chapter>>

[phoenix-downer]

Hello! I haven't played KH III yet but I plan to. I have come across some really hateful posts on tumblr and even twitter about Sora and Kairi being together. It appears some people are really upset that Sora and Riku didn't become a thing and have downplayed Sora x Kairi's relationship as something as forced and not having chemistry. I had no idea this was even a thing. Can you tell me where this hostility came from? I thought it was obvious that they had feelings for each other.

Hello! Thanks for the ask! There’s a lot to examine here, but I’ll do my best to try to tackle the whole issue with tact and empathy. Light/very vague spoilers for K/H/3, E/ndgame, and F/M/A follow (with slashes so they hopefully don’t show up in the tags).

First of all, I’m so sorry you’ve stumbled across those kinds of tweets and posts. If I could, I’d shield everyone from having to deal with such hatred and negativity about something they enjoy. Doesn’t matter what you ship; no one deserves to deal with that level of toxicity. 

Imagine going into a room and hearing people talk loudly about something you love, talk about how much they hate it and how much it sucks. Doesn’t make you feel very welcome, does it? But that’s exactly what’s happening here - you’re not the only one who’s noticed this. I have had to block or mute so many people because of the kind of bashing you describe. People purposely tagging their hate so that fans can see it, saying nasty things and picking fights in a way that makes you wonder what they get out of being so cruel and vicious. 

I’ve seen it so much that I’m extra sensitive to it now too; I block much more quickly than I did in the past. And I would advise other people to do the same. You don’t owe anyone access to your social media. They’re not entitled to your time or energy, either. You don’t owe it to them to read their hate. By blocking them, you take away part of their audience, you take away their attention. And the thing is, they want that attention. They want to make other people angry and miserable because they’re angry and miserable. And you don’t have to give them the satisfaction. 

Sadly, because twitter and tumblr have such poor moderation, no one running these sites is doing much to stop these people. In fact, the platforms even encourage that kind of behavior, because the loudest people get the most attention. So that encourages and emboldens the kind of nasty behavior you’re seeing.

Now, this is not to say there is never room for criticism, because there is, but that is a very different thing from what you’re describing, which is plain old bashing. Criticism and critique are offered in the hope that something will improve; bashing is done to express pure vitriol, and it isn’t productive for anyone. It might feel good in the moment, but in the end it just leaves people bitter and empty. 

There are plenty of people critiquing K/H and how the games went and how the various character arcs unfolded and how the relationships developed, and there’s nothing wrong with that. Shutting down all criticism isn’t healthy; it should be allowed and encouraged, as constructive criticism leads to healthy dialogue, both with other fans and with S/quare E/nix. And Square has listened to fans in the past; they’ve fixed issues with gameplay that occurred when 1.5 and 2.5 were ported to the PS4 and converted to 60 fps, for example.

Neither is there anything wrong with venting to a close friend in a private setting - DMs, PMs, on your personal blog or twitter account with the ship you’re criticizing censored somehow so that everyone who likes it doesn’t have to stumble across your venting. Heaven knows I’ve had to vent a lot to stay in the fandom without lashing out. The issue is when someone thinks it’s okay to force their anger and negativity onto other people who don’t want to see it or hear it. 

So the question is, why are we stumbling across such strong feelings? Because it’s clear people feel pretty strongly about all this. 

I don’t think there’s an easy answer as to why this is happening, but I’ll take a shot at explaining what might’ve happened all the same. I’m sure if you asked someone else, they might give you a different answer, and it’s worth getting multiple perspectives. This is just my two cents, and naturally, it’s going to be biased towards my experiences and preferences. 

The shipwars in the K/ingdom H/earts fandom have been nasty for years. From what I can gather, they got really bad when KH2 was released, though I’m sure there was probably drama before then. S*kai fans and S*riku fans did not see eye to eye on how that game went, and it’s all been downhill ever since. People on both sides have been mean and nasty, I’ve seen them be nasty, hurling insults and slurs and accusing each other of awful things to the point that the question of “who started it” is pretty much moot at this point. A more productive question would be, “how can we end it and get along, or at least start treating each other better?” 

Now, since I ship S*kai (obviously), I’ll share why this is such a touchy subject for me personally. I’ve been in fandom for a while now, and something I’ve noticed is just how much fans tend to hate female characters because of sexism and internalized misogyny.   

I was in the M/C/U fandom before this, and Sh*ron’s actress got death threats around the time C/ivil W/ar came out from angry shippers. And then P*ggy’s actress has likewise been harassed after E/ndgame came out by, again, angry shippers. I was a big F/M/A fan back in the day, and W*nry got so much hate from, you guessed it, angry shippers. I remember a friend back then rolling her eyes and bashing W*nry, and when I asked her why she hated her, she couldn’t really give me a clear answer other than that she was “whiny.” 

Heaven forbid a female character not be completely perfect. 

Over and over, I saw this pattern repeating. A female character gets hate because there is a popular alternate pairing that she “gets in the way of.” Even before I had the vocabulary to talk about it, the hatred just struck me as very gendered. I never saw that level of hatred for any of the male characters unless they were written to be hated (hello Shou T*cker). And I was likewise harsher on female characters than on their male counterparts. It took me years to realize what I was doing and to try to put a stop to it. 

So then I came to the K/ingdom H/earts fandom with all that background and baggage, dealing with years of people hating characters I liked and looked up to and identified with, and I saw the same thing happening again. Yet another female character getting nasty hate because of her gender, because she dared to like a boy who was shipped with another boy. Because she dared to fall in love. How dare she have feelings, how dare she be feminine, how dare she wear pink and have a flowery Keyblade. How dare her strength of heart be stronger than her physical strength. There is only one kind of strength that matters, and it’s how hard you can kick someone’s ass (wrong, wrong, wrong, and one look at the whole power of friendship thing this series revolves around would tell you that). 

How dare K*iri not be an instant expert at fighting, which is cruel and ironic because if she was an instant expert at fighting, everyone would be crying Mary Sue. How dare she sass and tease S*ra, she’s such a bitch. Oh, she doesn’t tease him as much in K/H/3 and is more gentle and supportive because he’s going through hell and nearly loses everything and she knows he needs her support now more than ever? She’s a complete pushover! 

See what I mean by how hard people are on female characters? K*iri can’t win no matter what she does. She could have the best character arc ever post K/H/3 and people would still find something to complain about. That’s not to say I don’t have issues with how she’s written, I just think the criticisms against her tend to be way overblown. There aren’t enough discussions about how she could improve moving forward (though I have seen them, and thank you to those of you who do have them!), instead people just write her off completely as useless and worthless and want to improve her character by… dropping her out of the story completely (and yes, I’ve run into someone who actually thought this would be a good thing and always felt the need to talk about it, and it absolutely drove me up the wall). 

And worst of all, she can’t win because S*ra fell in love with her. Really, it’s ironic that she gets as much hate as she does for something S*ra did. She had no control over S*ra falling in love with her, and yet she is absolutely despised by people because he did. She isn’t “good enough” for him apparently, whatever that’s supposed to mean.  

I share all this to explain why I was so sensitive to the issue coming in. I saw the same thing happening I’d experienced time and again and I was so exhausted. So tired of it. I didn’t want to deal with it again, and I was on my guard right from the start. Especially because it’s so normalized in online KH communities to bash K*iri and S*kai. The major ones, too, with lots of people and a wide range of (or lack thereof) of shipping preferences, not just dedicated shipping groups. Try to go an entire discussion without seeing it come up… it’s a lot harder than you might think. 

At first I tried to be patient and understanding. Other people have different tastes, and I wanted to be understanding of that. But after years of watching the bashing happen, my patience ran thin. I was sick of seeing it enabled in major K/H communities, sick of seeing mods refuse to put a stop to it, or worse, low-key join in with the bashing, sick of having to put up with so much negativity when all I wanted was somewhere to discuss something I enjoyed. Some people seemed almost gleeful, almost eager in their bashing; any time K*iri was brought up, they felt compelled to express their hatred for her. They were more obsessed with her than her actual fans were; felt more passionately (albeit negatively) about S*kai than some actual S*kai shippers did. 

When I reached that point, the point where I was tempted to be negative and snappy and rude, I knew I couldn’t engage with certain people anymore. So I stopped trying. I searched for S*kai fans here on tumblr and stuck with them. I didn’t want to add to an already tense situation, and thankfully, there are other people who feel the same way (but more on that later). 

And on the S*riku side of things, some of them have shared that they have been told nasty homophobic things for shipping S*riku. And for many of them, I’m sure S*riku is a way of expressing their identity, a way of exploring their feelings and expressing them in a safe, welcoming way with fellow fans who get what they’re going through. Representation has gotten better in recent years (though it still has a long way to go), but back when the K/H games were first coming out, things were different, and people had to take what they could get from canon and run with it if they wanted to see more content that represented them. 

I’ve also seen a few people say that certain S*kai fans went out of their way to message them and rub what happened in K/H/3 in their faces. That kind of gloating is bound to upset anyone, yikes. Canon has become the new gold standard for shipping in the last decade or so, and it has sadly been weaponized in the ever-nastier ship wars, when really, a ship’s value shouldn’t be based on how “canon” it is but on the joy it brings to people. 

So yeah, we have a situation where enough people on both sides were treating others poorly that everyone got defensive, because how could you not when people keep attacking something you love, especially if you feel strongly about it/associate it with your identity? And that made people more likely to lash out, and when they did, people got even more defensive, and the cycle repeated, over and over and over again. 

And you know how I mentioned I sought refuge with likeminded fans? I think that happened all over the fandom. People seek out those who will support them and support their beliefs and form identities and communities based around them… and that’s a double-edged sword.

On the one hand, it’s great to get so much support, especially if you’re seeking refuge from a particularly nasty ship war. Having a safe place to vent and unwind and finally get to talk about what you love without fear of getting hate over it is awesome.

On the other hand, things like echo chambers, confirmation bias, groupthink, and the false consensus effect flourish in those kinds of situations. If all you hear is that XYZ pairing must be canon or will be canon in a future game from the group of people you’ve surrounded yourself with, and everyone enthusiastically agrees because everyone ships the same thing you do and of course no one is going to rain on that parade, it can come as quite a shock when a new piece of canon comes out and doesn’t align to your expectations. Especially if you’ve spent years expecting canon to align with your expectations. 

We lose something when we can’t engage in healthy dialogue with people who disagree with us. Our perceptions get warped, our memories might even get warped, and what we could’ve sworn was canon… we might be surprised to see wasn’t, when we revisit the source material with a more critical eye or listen to someone who sees things differently than we do. 

But how can we have that healthy dialogue when there’s been so much bad blood? How can we listen to each other when there’s no trust? It’s nearly impossible, so instead we reinforce the beliefs and ideas our own communities already hold fast to, and the cycle continues. We draw lines in the sand separating “us” vs. “them” and don’t give each other a chance. Not only does this alienate people on opposite ends of the shipping spectrum, it also alienates multishippers because they’re considered “traitors” to both sides, and that is an uncomfortable place to be. 

I think that’s why you find the whole thing so jarring. I’m guessing you might not be as heavily involved with the fandom as I am, and have thus been largely immune from the perils of echo chambers and confirmation bias. So for you it must seem really weird that something that seems clear to you is so contentious to other people. I don’t say this to throw shade at anyone, because I know the same thing would’ve happened if the pairings had gotten switched around. It’s more of an observation of a phenomenon I’ve seen happen over and over again throughout the years. 

So all of that is to say, things are tense because of all these backgrounds and experiences and histories people bring into the fandom. No one exists in a vacuum, and things were already tense before K/H/3 even came out. K/ingdom H/earts has been such an important part of many people’s lives and growing up experiences that they feel a deep connection to it and almost a sense of ownership of it. It’s a shared story, a shared experience. It belongs to all of us, in a way, and yet it’s still N*mura’s baby.

And that’s where we run into more issues. How much say should fans have in a work of art? Does the creator get the final say in interpretation, or should she accept that once her creation has been released into the world, it’s up to other people to interpret what she meant? There are no easy answers to these kinds of questions, and they’re widely debated and discussed (see: the whole death of the author debacle). 

However, while I think feeling a sense of ownership and investment in a piece of art is totally fine, it crosses the line when it gets into the realm of entitlement. By this I do not mean asking for more representation, because that is a perfectly good thing to ask for; I mean demanding that the creators cater to your whims… or else. I mean contacting people who worked on the game on twitter and demanding they change the story to make it “right.” I mean directly telling one of the VAs you want her replaced because you thought she did a bad job. And yes, I am talking about actual stuff I’ve seen happen in this very fandom. All of that has also left me with a bad taste in my mouth, and other people I’ve talked to have felt the same. 

That being said, shipping in and of itself is not the problem. For every nasty tweet and bashing post out there, there are plenty of kind and good people who are just there to enjoy their ships. Lovely artists and talented writers and skilled gif makers and editors creating a wealth of beautiful content for something they love. People who would never harass others for their shipping preferences and are disgusted by those who do. Unfortunately, they’re not the ones getting the attention, and they’re probably not the ones you’re going to run into if you ship a different ship, as they tend to stick to their own spaces out of courtesy and respect. 

This means that the people you are more likely to run into are the ones who want to pick fights. The ones who bash and stir up drama and tell people to kill themselves for shipping XYZ. While there are plenty of people being cruel and nasty and toxic, there are good people in the fandom too. Kind, caring people who will see you as a person first and not an XYZ, even if they don’t agree with you on everything. They’re quiet(er), because kindness isn’t usually flashy and showy, but they’re here. You just have to know how to find them.   

Thanks for the ask! I tried to answer this as fairly as I could, based on my observations and things I’ve been stewing over for a while now, so I hope it sheds more light on the situation. 

[whenimgoodandready]

(ancient Chinese background music plays) Long ago, a grand temple stood in China, in it, held the most powerful artifacts unknown to man, the miraculouses. They were under the reign of a group of monks known as The Order of the Guardians. A young guardian was chosen to watch these magical items, but during their duties, caused a destruction that would soon lead to an even worse fate. The guardian survived protecting the Miracle Box, but lost two in their escape and the grimoire. The guardian lived with the guilt of their actions. They feared it would one day come back to haunt them............and it did! The story continues here:

*Feast-What has been seen in the Louvre that we haven’t already seen? The Mona Lisa being stolen (“Copycat”), Alya almost becoming a sacrifice (“The Pharaoh”), that big rock thingy with some kind of Chinese symbol on it. Wait! What’s that about? Well, let’s look that up............on the Ladyblog! According to our aspiring journalist, Alya has been researching the secrets of the miraculouses and how they’ve been around throughout the centuries! All the way from the Renaissance to the Ancient Greeks where all the great heroes were secretly miraculous holders and Alya discovered that through all of them bearing the same symbol like on the Miracle Box! (and that big rock thingy).

That’s pretty good, but let’s go ask someone who’s living proof of all this, Master Fu! Alright Wang Fu, we’ve been in this fandom for a few years now and we deserve to hear some God damn answers already! Now spill! Ahem! (sits down cross legged and tells the tale) When Fu was around Marinettes age, he was the chosen one to guard the Miracle Box, but like any (pre) adolescent, he hated the responsibility of the job especially since he was taken from his family and forced to sit around watching the box for 24hrs w/out food. Yeesh!😬 Fu used (out of all the miraculouses) the peacock one to create a sentimonster and have it fetch him some food. Unfortunately, it went outta control, due to Fu’s angst about being a guardian, ate the temple, the monks, the other miraculouses (wait! There’s more!?), so Fu ran away with the Miracle Box, as it had a craving for miraculouses, and he accidentally lost “you-know-which” along with the grimoire (the miraculous book) and the sentimonster fell into a lava pit. The End!

Um Alya, Sweetie, I think maybe you should stick to your other blogs cuz all that info you just put out there about the miraculouses, it got Hawk Moths attention! Now no thanks to that, Mayura (yes, Nat is still doing this, but this was before the “Ladybug” ep) is gonna unleash whatever’s in that big rock thingy (actually a lava rock) containing a “special surprise” inside! (P.S: it’s not a chewy caramel nouget). It’s the sentimonster! It’s name was Feast! It survived for centuries! And it’s still hungry! He was a small blue frog-like thing with a Chinese symbol on its head and no face, but a mouth and that tongue! Oh God! That tongue!😱👅. Hawk Moth promised it all the miraculouses (after he’s done with the two most important ones) and his and Mayura’s as a bonus if Feast fetched ‘em for him. Huh, you know, that’s actually the nicest thing I’ve seen Hawk Moth do. Really!

Driven by his extreme centuries old guilt, Master Fu takes back the heroes miraculouses and we have a very bizarre street chase that involves Marinette in a motorcycle suit/helmet (her signature disguise look) and Adrien in a banana suit!?............where the f*ck did he get that!? And yet, they believed they were their crime fighting partner cuz, Hey! Who else knows a tiny hundred year old Chinese man?

FINALLY! We got a backstory on what Master Fu’s biggest mistake was and how it all happened! Well it’s about damn time! (for f**ks sake, it’s Season 3!). He’s mentioned it in “The Collector” and he’s lived that nightmare in “Sandboy”, but the truth comes back to bite him in the a**. So, you mean to tell us, that the reason why the temple was done, why the peacock and butterfly miraculous were lost, why Emilie is in a coma, how Gabriel’s start of darkness happened, why we have the love square and how this whole show started was because Master Fu-HAD THE MUNCHIES!? WTF!? Are you f**king serious!? “This” was the cause! Okay, I get it! Fu was just a teenager when it happened. He was stubborn and selfish (just like our heroes) and of course, he didn’t know any better. He never asked for this! He was just a kid. He wanted to have fun and hang out with friends and not be put through a life changing experience from higher ups! Sure he made a huge a** mistake that caused a chain of events to happen, but he learned from those mistakes. We’ll get back to that, Alya meant well, she was only trying to help Ladybug unmask Hawk Moth cuz after 3 seasons already, they need to start tracking him down. First clue, he’s in Paris. Nathalie sensed an amok in that lava rock cuz Feast was in it and ate the staff where Master Fu put the amok and it caused her “dizzy spells”. Hmmmm, same as Emilie before her.......... “nap” (Gabe, get a second glass coffin). Something we learned in this ep, Hawk Moth can akumatize sentimonsters! Whoa! And Ladybug can “de-evilize” both an akuma and an amok at the same time! Sure it was wrong of Fu to take back the heroes miraculouses w/out their permission (especially after that sweet piano duet Adrien and Plagg had that was straight outta “Looney Tunes”/“Tom and Jerry” cartoon), but he did so out of safety concerns cuz Feast would’ve eaten them. Speaking of which Ladybug took up the role of Jonah again and this time w/ a sentimonster! And w/ Cat Noir! Lol! He was so done w/ that sh*t! Feast also ate Cats “stick” (Badum-tish!🥁). Mwah! Good-night everybody! Hey! Like Tikki told Marinette, “(Marinette) are Ladybug, w/ or w/out the mask!” (“Antibug”). Wayzz points out how determined and devoted the heroes are to help Master Fu and stop Feast despite their lack of powers cuz that’s what makes a true hero. That’s what made Fu realize he should stop giving himself a (literal) guilt trip and let them fight back! Sadly, no Jade Turtle transformation once again. Ugh! Why bother showing us the art of him when you don’t even show it! All we got was “Bikerbug and Banana Noir”! (still don’t know where he got that suit). After 172 years, the temple is brought back along w/ the monks and the rest of the miraculouses in Tibet thanks to Ladybugs “Miraculous Ladybug” fix-up (so it was 1844 when all this sh*t happened?). The Chinese miraculouses were the only ones left, but now that we know there are others (like the fandom OC-ed), we’ll be seeing ‘em! Like that Brazilian miraculous holder in Season 4 I heard! Hmmm, I know that there’s a Chinese zodiac and there’s also a Native American and Celtic one and last, but not least, the Western zodiac (with our own five elements) that includes a lion like how Hercules/Heracles was symbolized from what Alya said. Hmmmm, wasn’t there a concept art of a lion miraculous we saw? Marinettes training as Ladybug is fully complete and now, as was promised in “Backwarder”, Master Fu makes her the new guardian of the miraculouses!🎉Congrats! Marinette!🎉 Gabe/Hawk Moth will eventually realize Fu was Adriens Chinese substitute teacher (“Syren”) like how he almost figured out Adrien was Cat Noir (“Gorizilla”) from his discovery (“Simon Says”) now that he knows what the guardian looks like as well as his name (“Backwarder”). Watch yourself, Fu! Don! Don! Don!

[kristmullet]

My Journey to Delmar

Wow, blog #3! Who knew I had it in me??

My love life(if it could be called that) was never fun and mostly just confusing and messy until I found my husband. 

I’d had crushes on boys when I was young but my first “boyfriend”(psh!)  was in 8th grade. Back then I had a group of friends that was pretty evenly mixed boys and girls. At that time, we all basically played square dance with each other(it was just a case of switching partners when the last girl was done with whoever she was “dating” at the time. embarrassing, I know). My first actual guy who acknowledged the mutual crush we had on each other and put that boyfriend/girlfriend label on us was a boy named “B” (names changed out of embarrassment). He was sweet, funny, somewhat shy as well, but never seemed embarrassed of me. It was a quick, young thing that ended for reasons I’m not sure(patterns start here). I casually dated/crushed on other “square dance partners” from that friend group with little heartbreak or consequence. It seemed like I always had more feelings for them than they ever had for me(also pattern). I was friends lots of guys as well at school just because they were generally more fun/funny than the girls. My style at that time also started to transition to more of a punk/emo style that made me feel more comfortable and like myself. 

Anyway, my next, more serious, “square dance partner” in that friends group started innocently enough, with pretty little thought that this one would actually change my life pretty intensely. This relationship started out pretty chill. Mostly just hanging out, taking walks, sitting together at parties(if they could be called parties). “O” was even my first kiss. Sadly, this was a time I initiated and felt like I was more into him than he was to me. We started hanging out more and more and with my close friends less and less. He started to lightly pressure me and guilt me in little ways that I didn’t even really notice. He would make small comments about things he liked and disliked about me. Sometimes he would contradict himself but I just assumed I misunderstood him the first time. He would even tell me things that I knew instinctively(!) were lies and stories but I just figured I was wrong. Slowly his moods, attitudes, preferences would start going from one extreme to another. His stories got more unbelievable but they also preyed on my want/need to help and take care of others. He had claims of abuse, neglect, being poor, but all of it had a ring of believe-ability to it all. So I always tried to protect and help in whatever way I could, even financially.  With his swinging preferences, one day he would love my style, then say I was a “poser.” He wanted me to be a “bad girl”, then wanted me to be more “innocent.” He would love my curves, tell me I was fat, tell me to leave alone, then call me and tell me not to hang up for hours. Make me stay with him while he cried and tell me to go F*** myself basically. I sincerely stopped believing everything that I thought. **Big disclaimer: Ladies, Always trust your instincts. Don’t brush off that nagging voice. If you think someone is lying to you, they probably are. For those of you believers, I fully believe this nagging women’s intuition that people always talk about is the holy spirit trying to guide you. Don’t ignore that gut feeling. It can save you time, money, energy, heart break, and possibly your life. I’m not exaggerating when I say there are times I think this intuition saved my life.**

I second guessed everything. I mean everything. What I thought, wore, said, how I acted, even as little as what I listened to with my music. I would talk to my few remaining friends about him but I shielded him. I made everything sound less bad. I cannot stress to you how much he just straight up made me think I was wrong. Always wrong.  I went from having normal female teenage emotions to my feelings predicated on his and his swung so hard that I felt just sad and anxious so much of the time. I didn’t even realize it either. Hindsight has cleared this up so much. So how the hell was I supposed to get away from this? I didn’t! I believe 100% that God used his mood swings to save me. He decided he hated his life in Indiana so much that he ran away to his biological mothers house in Washington. Also around this time he told me that his mother was diagnosed as bipolar and that he thought he was too. This did start to connect the dots for me in some ways but also made me feel like a crap person if I gave up on someone who was mentally ill. He straight out told me that he would never get on medication and never talk to a therapist. He thought it would take out his spirit of who he was(or some ridiculous crap like that). Even with this, I was so controlled that I still stayed with his ass. He would call and message at all hours to talk, to beg for us to be together, to cry, to yell, to vent about how terrible his life was. He even would tell me how he hated me but didn’t want to break up, but wanted to get another girlfriend who was better, hotter, would “take care of his needs”, as a second girlfriend. That broke my heart. Destroyed me. Made me feel like a piece of trash that had to be discarded to the side but was kept around for the scraps. 

Finally, one night he flippantly said he wanted to break-up so he could be with this girlfriend(whom he did cheat on me with). I just said OK. I do not think he knew I meant it. He wanted me back almost immediately the next day but I decided I was done. I even eventually had to block him because he was still trying to manipulate me. 

After that, I was a bit more hesitant with my heart. I still tried to just have fun with guys(laugh, make jokes, etc), but I second guessed when I thought I maybe had a crush on someone. Even now looking back, I remember boys pretty obviously flirting with with me but I thought they were actually making fun of me. I couldn’t fathom someone genuinely flirting with someone who looked like me, who was as uncool as me. Sad, huh?

The next guy I even attempted anything with was this super friendly guy I had class with. I crushed on him and I figured he didn’t have  a crush on me but he was kind enough that he’d go to prom with me if I asked(he was a sophomore, so could not go by himself, so it made sense to me to ask him.). He agreed to go and we went. It was a pretty fun night, lots of dancing but nothing too remarkable. At the end of the night, after having an ok time, I got pretty bummed out when he basically left me at that. Polite after that but pretty much stopped being friends. 

After a while, one of my friends invited me to go to a random guy she somewhat knew house to hang(aka she wanted to make out with said dude but didn’t want to go alone). I went, hung(very uncomfortably), and ended up being set up with make-out dudes buddy, “W”. This was another time I was half-sure I was being made fun of or being set up as a total joke. “W” had no balls to even ask me out himself. It was fully ridiculous, BUT, we dated for maybe a month. This was another time where I initiated the first kiss. I basically always felt like a joke with him. Like he was going to throw up when he kissed me. He ended up breaking up with me in front of his bosses house after hanging out the whole evening, just to get back with his ex-girlfriend the next day. Yey for me.

I even met some dumb joker who was a friend of a friend. I think our first interaction was on instant messenger. Two dates, me driving 35 minutes to meet up with him both times. He immediately gets back with his baby mama. I never wanted to admit that one. I will say that these terrible “relationships” all came back to this complete lack of self confidence and respect. I wasn’t worth anything better. Totally thought this. 

After I met my husband, I still continued to have these thoughts. Still wondered when the other shoe would drop. When would he drop me and find out it was all a joke or a lie? Even in the past year, I am realizing I still allowed those things put in my brain long ago to still affect my feelings today. I’m still working today to be more clear and accurate in how I feel and how I look at myself. Also, allowing myself to feel happy and good when someone(AKA hubby) wants me to be happy and feel good. Insane but God is still working in my heart and head. 

Also, I can’t emphasize how much my husband has done to be steady and strong, caring and loving. I know I’ve never told my husband the extent of what happened in my relationships in the past, so the fact that he has always been such a rock is that much more amazing. Whether or he knows it or not, he saved me. Literally saved me from everything I could have put myself through. I could never repay him. Ever. I’ll love him forever. 

[renaleis]

[Without You, I’m Just a Sad Song]

AU: Barista!Jimin (sort of)

Pairing: Jimin x Reader (i tried my best to be gender neutral so everyone could enjoy)

Genre: Fluff; so fluff it’s like marshmallow fluff 

Length: 1.8k

Song: Sad Song - We The Kings ; pls listen to this song while reading!

So basically I did a fic exchange with the wonderful @jeonwrites and she requested a barista!jimin fluff and this was the best I could come up with but I love her to pieces and it was so much fun to do this fic exchange with her! Do check out her blog and her work! <3

p.s. feedback is always appreciated since it helps me improve! anyways hope yall enjoy some cute jimin :’)

  - Five years ago -

  With you, I'm alive, Like all the missing pieces of my heart, they finally collide.   So stop time right here in the moonlight, Cause I don't ever wanna close my eyes.

  The day you stumbled across the quaint little bookstore a few blocks down the road from your school was undoubtedly the best day of your life. It was filled with books both old and new, from literary classics to modern novels, and the tea or coffee, depending on when you visited, served by the owner made it a charming and lovely place; a hidden gem in every sense of the word. You quickly became a regular here, coming every day after class to work on your assignments and to try out the newest pastries baked by the owner Park Jimin himself.

  Jimin was a man of few words, but his actions said everything he didn’t need to. You’d learned that he has a passion for the culinary arts, particularly baking and brewing drinks, and had decided to turn a portion of the bookstore into a small cafe. Every time you came in there would be a plate ready for you, a freshly baked pastry with a cup of tea or coffee to go along with your reading for the day. On occasion there would be a book tucked underneath the plate, something he thought you would enjoy.

  He never said much, but he always paid attention to the little things. If you sniffled he’d bring you a few tissues, if you were shivering he’d take his scarf and wrap it around you; once when it was raining you’d forgotten your umbrella, and you’d walked into the store drenched in water. What did Jimin do? The boy ran to his apartment above the store and brought you a change of clothes along with a blanket to keep you warm.

  The bookstore itself was a hidden gem no doubt, but it took you two months of visiting to finally understand that the greatest treasure hidden in the store wasn’t the countless number of stories in books, nor was it in the countless frappuccinos, macchiatos, or teas, but the quiet boy behind the counter who took care of you like a lover.

  And maybe, that’s all Jimin really wanted.

  To call you his.

~~~

  - Four years and seven months ago -

  You’re the perfect melody,

The only harmony I wanna hear.

  It was quite cliche really, how easily Jimin had become smitten with you. Although admittedly, it was quite difficult to ignore a beautiful individual that came in every day with an aura like yours. Something about you drew him in like a moth to a flame. Most people would say that it was only puppy love, but Jimin knew that he had long since passed that phase, that the feelings he harbored in his heart were genuine and true. Of course, he was never able to express these feelings to you; he could never. It was as if his life had become a romance trope, one where he was too afraid to confess to you because of course the worst thing that comes to his mind is: what if the feelings weren’t mutual?

  Jimin shook his head, clearing these thoughts as he brought you today’s special: a chocolate filled croissant with a cafe latte. A pleasant warmth filled his chest as you smiled up at him, accepting the treats with a thank you.

  “I hope you enjoy these today [Y/N].” He said, bowing slightly.

  “Why don’t you join me today? The shop isn’t crowded right now and you could use a break Jimin.” You asked, feeling nervous at the prospect of being the one to invite him for coffee. Ironic really.

  “Sure.” Jimin smiled, excusing himself and returning a moment later with his own coffee.

  “So,” You began, taking a sip of your latte. “You seem to know all the things I like, but I hardly know anything about you.”

  “Well for starters, this here bookshop is my home.” Jimin held the cup between his hands, hoping that his nervousness wasn’t too obvious. His eyes darted back and forth before settling on the coffee in his cup. Jimin was not in any way prepared for this, and he suddenly became self conscious of his appearance. Did his clothes look okay? What about his hair?

  “Do you have any hobbies?” You continued, taking a bite of the croissant, and successfully breaking Jimin from his thoughts.

  “Pretty much everything I do here. Baking, reading, et cetera.” Jimin replied.

  “Is this like a full time job or part time? Do you go to the university nearby?”

  “Yeah I’m a freshman, but I take online classes so this is kind of like a full time job. I love it here though, since I get to meet all of the amazing and beautiful people that come into my shop.” Jimin felt himself relaxing in his seat as his eyes finally met yours. A smile made it’s way onto his face as he continued. “People like you [y/n].”

~~~

  - Three years and eleven months ago -

  You're my favourite part of me,

With you standing next to me, I've got nothing to fear

  It wasn’t long after that first conversation that you and Jimin had developed deeper feelings for one another, with simple fifteen minute chats that turned into talks that lasted hours. Some days you would end up sleeping at Jimin’s little half bookstore-half cafe because you both knew you’d just come back in the morning anyways.

  You wondered if this friendship between you two would ever grow into something more. You knew you had already fallen in love with him, and you were at least ninety-eight percent positive that Jimin felt as strongly for you. Of course, it had only been a matter of days after these thoughts made their way into your mind when Jimin had finally asked you on a date.

  That day was one that you would never forget. You had both been so nervous, stumbling over each other’s words until it finally reached a point where the two of you couldn’t control your laughter. Jimin wanted to take you on a nice dinner date followed by a movie (the traditional and classy way to woo a person he claims) but by the time you had finished dessert and managed to stop laughing both you and Jimin realized that, honestly speaking, these kinds of dates were too boring.

  Instead, the two of you ended up going to a night market a couple blocks away from the bookstore. The whole night was spent eating various street foods (the restaurant hadn’t been exactly filling), watching several performers and even dancing along to their music, and buying little fun and whimsical knickknacks together (Jimin still had no idea where to put the little marble cat statues the two of you bought).

  By the end of the night you two were exhausted, and you decided to head back to the bookstore, where Jimin made two caffe mochas. Ever since Jimin had found out that mochas were among your favorite coffee drinks, he’d wanted to make the perfect cup of caffe mocha for your first date.

  As the two of you quietly sipped your drinks, Jimin intertwined his fingers with yours, his thumb rubbing small circles on the back of your hand. Setting his cup down, Jimin felt his nervousness from the beginning of the date returning again as he contemplated his next move. Taking a deep breath he decided this was going to be his only chance and no way in hell was he going to mess it up.

  “Hey [y/n]?”

  “Yeah?” You turned towards him, cheeks burning as you realized how close he actually was. Without hesitating any longer than he wanted to, Jimin leaned forward, lips trembling as he kissed you. You were both shaking but it was okay, because first kisses weren’t meant to be perfect, only memorable, and neither of you would ever forget this moment. Jimin finally pulled away, smiling as he rested his forehead against yours.

  “Do you think it’s too soon to say I love you?” He asked.

  “Depends, do you think it’s too soon to say I love you too?”

~~~

  - Present day -

  Without you, I feel broke,

Like I'm half of a whole

  Without you, I've got no hand to hold,

Without you, I feel torn…

  “...Like a sail in a storm, without you, I'm just a sad song.” You smiled as you finished reading out loud the lyrics in the small book Jimin had given you today along with your coffee; a caffe mocha. You had gone through almost all the books in the store already, so Jimin had opted to give you books he made himself, compiled of various poems, song lyrics, and other things that reminded him of you. It was something he had started doing at the beginning of your relationship, along with the traditional caffe mocha drink reminiscent of your first date, and had continued doing for the four years the two of you had been dating.

  “What did you think of that song?” Jimin asked, eyes sparkling as he kissed your cheek.

  “I love it. In fact, I vaguely remember that song playing once or twice in the store before am I right?” You smiled, shifting in your seat, which in this case was Jimin’s lap, so that you were facing him.

  “Good because I was thinking of singing it with the other guys. Taehyung, Hoseok, and Seokjin are all for it, and Yoongi and Jungkook have no choice but to agree.” Jimin sighed in content as he rested his head in the crook of your neck, pulling you closer.

  “Oh? How did you get those two to agree to such a lovey dovey song?” You asked, fingers absentmindedly running through his hair.

  “Well because they’ll be singing it on our wedding day.” Jimin said.

  You choked, staring at him with wide eyes. “You’re thinking about when we get married already?”

  “Yeah, and I’m hoping for sooner rather than later.”

  “Jimin what-”

  “[Y/N] you only have a little bit of mocha left, why don’t you finish it first?”

  Rather confused, you did as he asked and brought the small cup to your lips, finishing the remaining bit of coffee. A small glimmer of black at the bottom of the cup caught your eye and as you brought the cup closer you realized that words had been inked into the bottom of the porcelain cup. You gasped as you read the words, nearly dropping said cup if it hadn’t been for Jimin holding your hands steady with one hand, while the other held out a small object that shined like a thousand stars.

  Will you marry me?

[jackieisgran]

Late Summer and Storms

Summer Ends Soon

We have had quite a busy life since ending camp in Ponce Inlet.  Bud and I went to SK’s Drop In Day at school to meet her teachers.  This year she has 2 men and 1 woman teacher.  The woman has been at THS for a while but the men are new this year.  Her home room teacher is baby teacher. He just graduated from University of Alabama.  The other man is an Army Medic veteran. I think sixth-grade will be a good year for her.

I told about her softball experiences and games in the Summer Camp blog.  But we have attended all games that we were able to go. Her determination to play was amazing.

Story about my new friend Billy

This summer my condo neighbor who lost her husband last winter introduced me to her nephew.  He was quite a talker.  He had just bought  a house on the river and was working on getting it ready to move into.  He was staying with my neighbor.  She told me one day that with all his talking he was just like his Dad.  She said” Now I know why my sister left 20 yers ago. 

When we were doing our closet purge, we had several items that we gave to Billy for his house.

Our outdoor wicker furniture was wearing out to the metal and the metal was staining the deck.  We wanted  to get rid of it but our neighbor had gone to Pennsylvania until after Christmas  and we did not know how to contact Billy .  We were thinking about how we could dispose of the settee and 2 chairs.   I told Bud that I was going to put a note on neighbor’s door and if Billy was coming to check on her condo he would see it.    We were there almost a week and no Billy.   We spent an afternoon on the beach and was coming back and ran into Billy.  He said he had not been at  our neighbor’s and had not seen the note.  We offered him the furniture for his house on the river.  After his exercise session on the beach he and his son came by and wanted the furniture.   His son said it would look better on the porch than the old sofa they had on it now.  Billy’s pride and joy is that he has furnished his house for about $500.  Billy calls it Shabby Chic.   The son pointed out that our kitchen back splash is just like the one he has installed at their home.  At least Shabby Chic has some class.

Once the furniture left on Sunday, we started looking for Labor Day Sales for outdoor furniture that we need to have in place by January.  Monday we rode up to Holly Hill to look at some. We wanted the reclaimed plastic stuff that is guaranteed for 20 years.   We walked in the store and right into 2 of the  pub hight chairs on sale for a great price.  Then we found 2 folding Adirondack chair in the reclaimed plastic material priced well  below the stuff I had been shopping for online.  We have some of the same furniture at out house so I knew the prices. 

The only thing I was not able to get was a table to go with the pub chairs.  It was already put together as well.  But then we had to fit it into the Jeep.  But Bud did the great packing and we headed home with our new treasures.  Just as we arrived back at condo the clouds opened up and the downpour began.  We had to sit in the Jeep for awhile until the worse was over.  Then we had to get the stuff up to the elevator and then up and out of the elevator and to the condo. 

We did not set it up since it is hurricane season and we bring all our stuff inside when we leave during the season. 

We left on Tuesday morning and made the drive home via I-95, I-10, and I-75 until we got to Tifton.  We then went US 82 toward the other side of GA   It was a good drive,  Not much traffic and beautiful scenery.   We stopped in Albany, Ga to see the Ray Charles Plaza with the revolving statue of Ray Charles playing the piano  while Ray’s music played.  Then we went to  Cuthbert and headed north to Columbus.  There we found the school and watched SK’s softball game.   They lost a close game.  She had the choice of riding the bus home or riding with us.  She chose us.  ( Her friends were not riding the bus and they had lost)  We took her to Bonefish to eat.  We were hot and sweaty and she was in her uniform.  We went anyway. They treated us as if we were all cleaned up and dressed well.  The food was great. SK enjoyed it a lot.  Then we took her home.

On Thursday Bud and I headed back to Columbus  to another school for her game.  They won and she opted to ride the bus home.  We were hotter and sweatier than we were on Tuesday so Bud and I just went home instead of eating out. We were really hot!

We spent the weekend covering up decks beneath the walnut tree that is dropping walnuts and leaves and has some very high caterpillar nests and they were giving up their droppings as well.  They we set out to hurricane prep our house. Stacked and covered all the pool furniutre. and put it all in the corner of the fence. They were 4 or 5 tropical things out in the ocean and we were going to North Carolina to stay with Mother while Sister went on vacation and didn’t want to have to ask the Mama and The Daddy to come and do it like they had to do last year.

Well, as The Mama said: “ Nothing worries me as much as my hurricane magnet mother heading toward the hurricane.    We have been here since Tuesday and have been on hurricane alert for 3 days.  The first day there were lines right over Mother’s house on the cone of uncertainty.  But now we are not in the cone but  are in the outer bands which is breezy and one and off clouds and sun.  This afternoon the breeze picked up and the clouds are thicker. 

We went out on Wednesday and to found almost everything we need.  The Target and BJ”s had water in every aisle.   Harris Teeter had none.  The day before we heard there was none.  The only thing we did not find were hamburger and hot dog bun liked we wanted.  

So we have plenty to eat.  We have eaten well.   Tomorrow we will wake to find where that pesky Florence is now and where she is going.  We are suppose to get a lot of rain.   

I went out today to get a couple of items from Food Lion in Haw River.  There was no crowd and I got everything on my list.  But the bread shelves were empty.  I asked the checker about the fact that there were no crowds. I asked if all the bat crazy people had all ready got all the stuff they need.  She said she had another name for them which included an F word.   

I will add to this  as we learn more.

[some-thoughts-and-crosses]

When the slopes hit back...

I’m out of sequence again…I wanted to capture this trip but had things to say I wasn’t sure how to express. As with all these blog posts though, I decided to just write them completely unedited, so at least there’s a record. Plus I have another upcoming trip this weekend and am 2 posts behind already – so, best do it now. What a compelling start!

In Feb, I went away for the weekend to a ski town called Ovindoli. It’s about an hour and a half outside Rome, in Abruzzo. I went with 3 lovely girls from work, invited by one I knew pretty well (Sarah), while the other I knew a little (Stephanie), and the last not at all (Inkeri).

We stayed overnight at a beautiful medieval town called Fontecchio, an hour or so away from Ovindoli. Our digs looked like they were once part of a castle, and our host was so gracious and kind. We met him at the Square’s parking and he walked us over to our rooms – which we wouldn’t have found on our own.

This is where the women used to gather for water until as late as the 1960s.

Here be a medieval-times store-front. “Just like in Beauty and the Beast!” (Steph).

The town’s cultural group was having a celebration and aperitivo that night and we were invited.

We ended up passing the chief performer anyway as we went by the clock tower – the starting point. He was animatedly playing the accordion as we went by in preparation for the evening. He and his friend – a sweet girl who spoke English, told us they were starting at 19:30, so we walked around a bit and headed back closer to the time. It was very informal and apparently he and another friend’s first performance! They played accordion and tambourine, singing local songs in dialect with great enthusiasm!

They even dressed in matching plaid shirts – their way of looking like ‘mountain’ people, we were told. I sent a clip to the gang and Aatish mentioned they gave off chutney jol vibes – which is pretty apt!

Everyone there was so friendly and welcoming to us – we were treated like VIPs. Steph pointed out that we made quite the exotic and international group, with her being Chinese-American, Inkeri being Finnish, and Sarah (also American), being red-haired – particularly uncommon in these parts.  

Alessio, our host, gave us a tour of the clock tower. It’s housed at the top of what is now a gallery. This was part of a permanent exhibit showing images from the earthquake of a few years ago that caused damage and deaths.

However all this came after day 1 at the ski resort. I managed to book a private hour lesson around 3PM, and had all but managed to psych myself out before it. Sarah and Steph can ski, and Inkeri was set to ski-board. I, on the other hand, had never so much as ridden a ski lift. I got fitted out for my skis and boots with the others anyway, and wore the boots for the day until time for my lesson. This was a big part of why I almost cancelled! It’s hard to explain just how awful these boots are. They’re extremely heavy and cumbersome. I felt like they were moon boots built to withstand anti-gravity environments, except I was wearing them on earth. Each step felt like a fall waiting to happen. And they hurt my shins. Carrying the skis around was also uncomfortable. I was also convinced (helped in part by anecdotes from colleagues) that I would fall and injure myself in the attempt of learning. I mean, I could barely walk with these boots – and I’d had a lot of practice walking! Please note that the idea of falling is not new to me. I have fallen many times on incredibly varied forms of transport. I’ve been jet-skiing (great fun, though I did end up overturning it and landing in the water). I have even face-planted in snow from steering a husky sled in Norway – at night, while it was snowing on my eye-balls. If you know me, you’ll know that looking cool is not my primary concern in this life. However I was worried about how I would get around and manage by myself in Rome, should I end up with injuries. Being alone and reliant on public transport, has its drawbacks.

My travel buddies were so sweet though, they even offered to give me a trial lesson pre-official lesson, so I could be more comfortable. This didn’t go well. This was not because they weren’t good instructors. I fell, and couldn’t get up. They had to help me un-click my skis before I could rise. This made the idea of practicing on my own nerve-wracking. I pictured myself in some undignified pose, unable to help myself back up. In retrospect, I could have probably managed to un-click my skis and get up, but I was pretty nervous at this juncture and not thinking very positively. I also didn’t want to get in anyone else’s way and unwittingly hurt someone.

I realised I was also feeling particularly sensitive. I suddenly felt a little overwhelmed by not knowing how to do yet another thing. And being torn between warring feelings of privilege that I could even be in a position to learn, and frustration that I had to suffer through the process of learning so late in life, when it’s just so much harder (for various reasons). At this juncture I want to quote Mindy Kaling (Why not me?):

Yes, I had the extreme privilege of starting to learn to ski. And I was miserable. I hated the feeling of ineptitude. I was suddenly tired of all the hassles whenever I wanted to try something new, logistical and otherwise.  I remembered learning to scuba dive, and being beset with the worst sea-sickness from the choppy water. And feeling conspicuous from being the only people of colour then (along with my brother. I’ve always been a proponent of doing the thing; trying new experiences. I’ve abseiled and been on zip-line slides. I have had a few horse-riding lessons. I’ve had one archery lesson. I tried to ice-skate once, when I lived in London over a decade ago. Kew gardens in winter is pretty magical, but I can still remember the unwieldy awfulness of being in those skates, as I clutched the rail for as long as I could stand before getting off the ice. I was tired of all these wonderful, awful experiences. I was resentful that so many of them were so hard, or had scary elements. I know…I was feeling sorry for myself. Poor Sena, who has trouble with her elitist adventures. All I can tell you, is that the struggle felt real. I realised that so many of these involved me venturing out alone, and receiving strange looks for being there in the first place. I am not over-sensitive, but I am perceptive. I wished it could just be easier. I felt resolve that my nephews and nieces wouldn’t ever feel this way. That they would have options early, and would be helped along as far as I could.

I did manage to pull myself together in time for my lesson. I lucked out with a wonderful instructor. She was patient and kind, and I ended up having a great lesson. That doesn’t mean I turned out to be a skiing savant…not at all. I still fell, but I learned too - and after my 2 lessons, I could feel an improvement.

Post weekend, I gave my mixed feelings some consideration, and happened to come across a timely article by one Maria Popova:

“De Botton distills Nietzsche’s convictions and their enduring legacy: The most fulfilling human projects appeared inseparable from a degree of torment, the sources of our greatest joys lying awkwardly close to those of our greatest pains…

Why? Because no one is able to produce a great work of art without experience, nor achieve a worldly position immediately, nor be a great lover at the first attempt; and in the interval between initial failure and subsequent success, in the gap between who we wish one day to be and who we are at present, must come pain, anxiety, envy and humiliation. We suffer because we cannot spontaneously master the ingredients of fulfilment. Nietzsche was striving to correct the belief that fulfillment must come easily or not at all, a belief ruinous in its effects, for it leads us to withdraw prematurely from challenges that might have been overcome if only we had been prepared for the savagery legitimately demanded by almost everything valuable. (Or, as F. Scott Fitzgerald put it in his atrociously, delightfully ungrammatical proclamation, “Nothing any good isn’t hard.”)

I’ve been nursing the assumption that I am uncoordinated and un-athletic, but actually, I was an active kid. I ran and jumped long and high, and there was always swimming. Stopping to think about it, maybe it’s more that I’m just bad until I get good. I still have a list of other activities to try out. I will try to remember this lesson.

After all that, let us end with a pic of the best hot chocolate I have ever had. It was in a cozy restaurant on the mountain, while surrounded by snow. Also, ski-lifts are fun.

[limitlessgojo]

Blood Bound: Red Strings of Fate (Ch 13)

Warnings: Action, Coarse Language, Fighting, Descriptions of Blood

Previous Chapter: Goldenrod

Next Chapter: The More You Know

Next SFW Chapter: Big White Lies

Tags: Soulmates AU, Angst, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Fem!Reader

Taglist: @lessie-oxj @rizzo-nero @whoreuc @fkngkumiko @isl3t @gojoussunglasses @onepotatostand-blog @s-t-f-u-b-i-t-c-h @sunaswife @lordguameow @track5enthusiast

Notes: If you want to be tagged for every update, specify if you're okay with nsfw posts or not, and please mention it in the comments below ty ❤

Chapter 13: Home Sweet Home

That weekend you went back home. It was so refreshing to see everyone. You yelped out with joy as you ran over to your cousin “Hiroki niichaaaan~” You jumped into his arms.

He hugged you tight. “How have you been doin lil sis?”

“Very good! I missed you all so much, especially you Hiroki nii." You pouted up at him.

You caught up with your family, had meals with them, and trained with Hiroki. They were most curious about your soulmate, as you have expected.

“What’s he like? Aren’t people from the big 3 clans so stuck up all the time? Even Satoru is full of himself at times, ey?”, Hiroki asked you with a mouthful of food.

“He isn’t too bad to be honest. He’s a gentleman and sweet with me. Decent man. Just, seems a bit like the private type? I mean… Doesn’t talk much about his family even though we are soulmates. Oh I’ve already talked to him about you guys.” You added.

Hiroki tilted his head, “Ehhh… mysterious huh.”

“Give him time. The Kamo Clan aren’t the most open minded people. They’ll feel you out before allowing you in.” Your dad said.

“Even though I’m his soulmate?!” You exclaimed.

Silence. “We don’t know what they’re thinking so we can’t say for sure.”

◇◇◇

“Heh, you’ve gotten better lil sis,” Hiroki dropped low and thrusted out his spear. You jumped and immediately shifted your stance to land a kick on him. He easily parried and slipped out of your range.

Your family specializes in dealing with reverse cursed techniques aside from the occasional esper. Hiroki was only a semi-grade 1, because he trained his ass off for years.

Now that he’s built, he uses cursed tools to help him fight. A strong 185cm man can definitely handle close combat well. And in terms of healing abilities, he was number 1 in the clan.

It was only the women in your family that were able to inherit psychokinesis for some reason. But usually it only applies to a specific thing. Like how your mom can control plants. And your other aunt does with small metallic items like coins and darts.

Mother approached you after your sparring session. "Does he make you happy my dear?" Your mother asked you. Hiroki drank quietly from his water bottle.

You thought about it. The past few months were not easy but really colorful with Noritoshi. Minus the nagging feeling of him covering up his family affairs from you.

But… "He does. I feel so safe with him ma. Like I do with all of you. He is family to me now. I think I really like him and I trust him with my life." You whispered out.

"Then next time, bring him here. We will gladly welcome him with open arms." Hiroki smiled at you and leaned into your side.

◇◇◇

You went to visit your dead older sister’s grave just before you went back to Kyoto Jujutsu High School.

It was just you and Hiroki. You both cleaned the grave, trimmed the weeds, changed the flowers, burned fresh incense, and said your prayers for Sora. It was such a clear day with barely any clouds. The sky was so blue.

Just like her namesake.

Hiroki left you to give you some privacy, saying that he’ll pick you up in 2 hours.

You took a deep breath. “Sora neechan. It’s been a while. Sorry I couldn’t come to see you as often, because I’m currently a student at Jujutsu High.”

“I met this guy. He … So he is my soulmate. The first time I met him, I thought he was pretty. As I got to know him more, I felt as if there was a reason as to why the heavens chose him for me you know? He is really cool, but so warm and sweet with me. I think I’m a little bit in love with him.” You admitted.

“I’m really scared to lose him. After I lost you, I just… it was hard… I try my best to be cheerful and helpful really. But it gets tiring at times. I’m glad I was able to make a lot of friends who understand the life of a Jujutsu sorcerer at least. I tried to open up to Noritoshi a bit more. But it’s hard because he seems so closed off at times.”

You had mixed feelings, because you promised Noritoshi you would trust him more. That means working on anything that bothers you regarding your relationship with him. But can he accept it if you tell him that you want to know more about his family? He already clearly stated he needs more time.

“Am I being too greedy and hasty Sora? I want to support his clan affairs, even if it's just a tiny bit as his soulmate. He seems so troubled with it all the time. Like he wants to carry the burden all alone. I want to help, but he doesn’t really let me. I don’t know. I wish you were still here with me.”

“Last time I asked him about his parents, he snapped at me. Of course he apologized. … Maybe it’s all just in my head. But I do want to meet his family. Eventually. Though at this rate I have no idea when. Everytime I ask about them he just shuts up.”

“Falling in love is way too hard….”

The wind blew as if to agree with you. The leaves rusted in a circular dance just around the grave. You smiled.

You bid farewell to your family after the weekend. Hiroki hugged you tight and whispered, “I hope it gets better for you and Kamo kun soon enough.”

You looked up at him, “Yeah, thanks bro.”

◇◇◇

You texted Noritoshi and let him know that you were on your way back. He said he was free for the evening and that you could come over to his room.

You knocked on his door with anticipation. You opened the door, “I'm back, Toshi!” He pulled you into a tight hug and closed the door behind you. “I missed you. Come in. How was your family? Sorry I couldn’t go with you again.”

“It’s fine! They’re all okay and excited to meet you next time.” You looked up at him. He looked a bit regretful, “Next time I’ll make sure to properly clear my schedule with my father so I can go meet them okay?”

“Ah, okay.” You both walked over to his table and knelt down on the floor.

“I’ve been wanting to tell you this for a while,” you started. Noritoshi looked on intently. “I’ve already told you about my family right? Mom and dad and my other male cousins. Ah, what I didn’t tell you before was… I used to have an older sister. I - uhm. Well she died after being attacked by a curse. I … I hope to bring you to her grave one day.”

Noritoshi’s heart dropped. He pulled you in close. “I’m so sorry to hear that. I’m sure she is proud of you. Of course I’ll go with you to see her next time.” He was now highly regretting choosing to do some useless tasks for some of his clan’s elders instead of spending the weekend with you.

You gripped his clothes tighter. “Thank you, that really really means a lot to me.” You started tearing up, but you blinked your tears away.

"Oh! My family and I have gifts for you. I'm not so sure if you'll like it. It's a Coral and gold bracelet. Everyone in my family has one. It's almost like tradition for us, and we believe it to have a layer of protection. I also brought Jade here for you." You presented the bracelet alongside the Dragon carved Jade Pendant hanging on a thick white gold chain.

Noritoshi's eyes widened. The jewelry was stunning and looked expensive. He may have been favoured as the heir to the Kamo clan, but even he didn't own so much expensive jewelry.

He sputtered out “I appreciate it but I can’t take something so expensive and precious-”

“Noritoshiiii,” you whined out loud, making him stop talking. “You don’t want to accept such a precious gift that I picked out for you?” you whined with the largest puppy eyes.

“No, I- I am grateful. Thank you, I’ll accept it.” Noritoshi conceded.

Got him. You grinned madly as he shook his head. “You’re a dangerous one,” he muttered under his breath. “What was that?” you asked him absentmindedly as you worked on unclasping the bracelet to put it around his wrist. “Nothing, nothing at all dearest.”

You narrowed your eyes at him before grabbing his wrist and putting it on for him. It was a perfect fit. You thanked yourself for loving to hold his hand so much that you knew his general hand measurements.

His hands down to his wrists were so pretty. You didn't realize that you were playing with and smiling down at his fingers until he opened up his hand and linked his fingers with yours.

Slowly, carefully. Falling in love with you was the easiest thing Noritoshi had experienced. Now that he had embraced his emotions and tried to open up to you, it was a bit better now.

'Is this what love is? I don't know since it's my first time experiencing it.' Noritoshi wondered to himself.

It was in the smallest of things with you. He loved the way you would call out his name with loving eyes. The way you would always greet him first before the other senpai. The way you give him coffee and kisses on late and cold nights of studying.

The way your hair smells. Your perfume. The way your eyelids flutter shut when he kisses you. The tightening of his chest and shortness of his breath made apparent whenever he was with you.

The way you don't ask for too much from him. Just that he shows his love to you either by his actions or words. The comfort he simply feels when he is beside you.

He really just needed some time, and seeing you around more often really made up for it.

He ticked the inside of your palm which made you shiver and yelp. He laughed out loud at this and pulled you into his lap, hugging you tightly.

Staying quiet, you buried your head in his chest. You could feel his heartbeat, and it was faster than you expected. But soon it went back down to a steady rate.

"Your heartbeat is so steady, but mine is always wild around you. Noritoshi I feel kinda embarrassed to be honest." You admitted, fingers curling into his kimono.

He smiled and his heartbeat quickened to match yours. You looked up at him in confusion. "Did you just…" He just leaned down to rub his nose against yours. "I am a blood manipulator. I can manipulate my pulse rate darling." You huffed out a laugh, feeling warm and fuzzy.

"I love you." You said suddenly. He stared in shock at your words. You realized that you said it without intending to. But you didn’t take it back.

"Kamo Noritoshi I'm madly in love with you." It wasn't a sudden realisation of being in love. You slowly fell for him again and again each day.

Noritoshi’s brain short circuited.

Suddenly he was kissing you. Tongue slipping into your mouth and playing with yours and rubbing along the roof of your mouth.

You tried to fight his tongue for dominance, but you ended up surrendering, your back bent back with your face turned up towards him.

You clasped your hands around his neck as he pressed deep kisses against the top of your chest. Your face was flushed as you fell limp against him, gasping out heavy breaths. "I'm not going anywhere angel." Noritoshi whispered against your neck, hands tightening possessively against your waist.

‘Please wait a little longer for me. Until I can confirm that these feelings for you are indeed true love.’ His thoughts went unsaid.

The one thing Noritoshi promised to himself is that he would never lie about his feelings for you. To him, the worst he could do was to confess his love without actually being in love with you.

Blood Bound: Table of Contents

[rafablogs]

Website Blog Posts (August 2004-August 2008) - Part 1

The following blog posts have been copied from https://tt.tennis-warehouse.com forum. I have no way of confirming whether they are genuine or not since Rafa’s old website is long gone and I have been unable to retrieve any captures of the website from that time on internet archives.

AUGUST 9TH 2004 - INTERNATIONAL SERIES, SOPOT (POLAND), CLAY

I won my first ATP tournament! An International Series in the Polish city of Sopot. In the final I beat the Argentine Jose Acasuso 6-3 6-4 and although that year I would achieve other successes that would leave this one as an anecdote, I will always remember it with the warmth it deserves.> DECEMBER 5TH 2004 - DAVIS CUP, SEVILLA, CLAY

I have never hidden my admiration for Moya, a brother to me and a marvel with the racquet. Masterful on clay, his service rivals that of the best specialists and he managed to reach the final in Australia. It is hardly surprising that he has been a true number one.

The G3 captains confided in me in the clash against Roddick. I came to the team as a substitute and jumbped to the Cartuja Olympic Stadium as the second on board to be matched up against the most powerful service on the circuit in a final. Charly wished me luck, which he said I would not need to beat him, though frankly outside the team nobody believed I could beat the world number two.

But I managed to do it. I notched up the 2-0 which placed the final in our favour. The fans were not only witnesses but also accomplices: they took me in the air and I could feel the public's breath surrounding me on court... and that shook me until then I had been a practically an anonymous player.

In the fourth clash, Roddick lost to Carlos 3-1. The Salad Bowl stayed at home and the Cartuja led to delirium.

Acapulco and Costa do Squipe belong to the the Latin American clay tour, and are excellent tournaments for preparing the season on clay. I won both titles, and above all my feelings on court were entirely favourable: I was not only reaching the main courses hungry, but also at a sweet moment.> FEBRUARY 21st 2005 - INTERNATIONAL SERIES, ACAPULCO (MEXICO), CLAY

Acapulco and Costa do Squipe belong to the the Latin American clay tour, and are excellent tournaments for preparing the season on clay. I won both titles, and above all my feelings on court were entirely favourable: I was not only reaching the main courses hungry, but also at a sweet moment.> APRIL 17TH 2005 - TMS MONTECARLO, CLAY

I got my first vicotry in a Master Series against Guilllermo Coria, my first significant triumph and the first of my three consecutive conquests of this tournament. It was also the first trophy I bit, and since then this has been my sign of identity. You will understand that I remember it as a first step.> APRIL 24TH 2005 - INTERNATIONAL SERIES GOLD, OPEN SEAT GODO (BARCELONA), CLAY

This was the final that the crowd demanded, a Spanish duel between two good friends. I was matched against Ferrero, one of the greatest racquet talents of the recent years, former world number one, who was hungry for titles after a complicated season and seemed to recover his best form in Barcelona.

And he confirmed this in the final.

Juanca's right hand is privileged, and his passing shots down the lines are unique on the circuit. He played at a very high level and showed his enormous class; "el mosquito" is a master on clay.

You will wonder how I managed to beat him. Well, everything went right for me that day, or maybe I should say everything went in...

After this match, the Spanish press labelled me as favourite for Paris, an awkward praise, as it was my first participation.> MAY 2ND 2005 - TMS ROME, CLAY

In 2004 I was going full sail with the wind in my favour. Hardly a fortnight had passed since Monte Carlo and I was getting my teeth into my second Master Series, after an exciting final against Coria. I felt I was in a state of grace, with complete confidence with my sight set on Roland Garros> MAY 31ST 2005 - ROLAND GARROS, CLAY - SEMI-FINAL

I am honestly making an effort to explain what I felt. Euphoria? Satisfaction? Ecstasy? No, it was something more than this. Sometimes words do not do justice, they are not enough, and this is one of those times.

In the semi-finals, I faced Federer, and it is true that I felt plethoric on clay... as true as the match seemed intimidating, I felt respect. I am not saying fear. Never.

My start was explosive. I knew that Rogerio (as I friendly call him) was not used to hitting so high and would take a few games to get used to my lifting. I had to exploit this. I won the first set comfortably, aware that Roger had now got my measure.

The next set was different. The Swiss started his showtime and made it clear that he could play a sublime tennis on a gravel court. However, I also noted a couple of things, I had to get him off the court. Roger would not waste any short ball, I had to make sure that it would impact in conditions that would not allow him to put this speed to the ball only his wrist is able of. 'Let's see what you can do hitting above your shoulders', I thought.

The third set fell to me. Roger took out the set square and the triangle, sending the ball into unreachable angles, and then I reached it. I ran as never before, trying to unsettle him, counter-attacking on each of his winning rights. I knew the premise: keep him away from the net.

Fourth set, I was exhausted, as if that was important. I was caressing my first Grand Slam final and was prepared to run to it. Literally. 'Who said weariness?', I repeated. In the last set I managed to beat him and get a ticket for the final.> JUNE 5TH 2005 - ROLAND GARROS, CLAY - FINAL

I found it hard to believe that it was actually happening, getting into a final after beating a certain Federer on my first participation in the tournament.

There, Mariano Puerta was waiting for me, a player coming back to the circuit after a two-year suspension for doping, and he gave positive once more after the test in Roland Garros, although the result would not be known until months later.

The Argentine was also a left hander, and as a specialist in opening up the court. In my favour my physique and a deep conviction of victory. These were not enought to submit him in the first set, which he won after a tight tie break. Puerta felt worn out and I imposed myself in the following games without giving him any options. First match ball, he was at service. I was ready.

His first service failed. I wasn't counting on this, I could almost touch the cup and the tension was suffocating me, the instant Puerta was preparing his second service seemed to go on and on. Dry mouth, mental block, stiffness numbness... and then the ball crossed the net.

I did not return as I should have, I gave back a tame ball, easy for a volley. I was nailed to the court, calling for a miracle, I couldn't stand playing another game: I felt the trophy, my dream, within reach of my hands and I feared it would slip away between my fingers. When Puerta hit, my head was frenetically repeating one word...

'Out'. He failed it. I was the champion of Roland Garros. Suddenly everything stopped, the world seemed to hold its breath while I fell backwards, covering myself in the red dirt.

Maybe there is a word to describe it: 'indescribable'.> JULY 4TH 2005 - INTERNATIONAL SERIES, BASTAD (SWEDEN), CLAY

After the Roland Garros hangover, it was time to get back to the grind. The clay season had not finished and I had to get the most out of the good moment I was enjoying. In Bastad, I fulfilled my role as favourite by imposing myself over Berdych in the final; maybe it is not a highly renowed tournament, although a handful of points will always be welcome.> JULY 18TH 2005 - INTERNATIONAL SERIES GOLD, STUTTGART (GERMANY), CLAY

In the final I came up against the one and only: Gaston Gaudio, a tennis player, who awakens as much praise as criticism: a potencial top 5 going downfall by a harshly censured mental fragility, and the winner of Roland Garros in 2004. 'The Cat' came to Germany way off form and I beat him comfortably in three sets. In any case, it is always gratifying to compete with a rival of his quality.> AUGUST 8TH 2005 - TMS MONTREAL, HARD COURT

I have always had self-confidence, believing myself capable of anything I proposed, and even my dreams fell short of a season like this. Nevertheless, Toni insisted that I should rid myself of the role of a clay court tennis player, and he was right. How many tennis players control clay, but never achieved important victories on fast surfaces? I did not want to be one of them, I could not afford it.

In the Master Series in Montreal I won my first title on hard courts against a legend the like of Agassi. It would not be the last.> SEPTEMBER 12TH 2005 - INTERNATIONAL SERIES, PEKING (CHINA), HARD COURT

Guillermo Coria is given the name of The Wizard. Nothing more to say. He played in the final of Roland Garros last year, he was the former world number three and has been the standard-bearer of Argentine tennis for years.

He won the first set after a tie break, and then I reacted and overwhelmed him pitilessly in the following two. One month after Montreal, I was holding my second cup on hard court, inconceivable months earlier. This made Toni as proud as Rolland Garros did.

[male-emporium]

This Is What We Had To Say When We Answered 10 Questions About Each Other In Celebration Of Our 5 Year Wedding Anniversary

Today marks our fifth wedding anniversary! Man, does time fly by! To celebrate, we thought it would be fun to do a Q&A to share a little bit more about the two of us (from the other’s perspective!), so we had a neutral third party come up with the questions and we both answered them separately. I was giggling when I finally read Thomas’s answers last night because in a few of the questions, we mentioned the same or opposite things. I swear we had no idea what the other person was writing! We’re celebrating this evening with a date night after work, but in the meantime, here’s what we had to say about each other after five years of marriage…

  Wedding Anniversary Q&A:

  What is one quality in Julia/Thomas that you discovered during marriage and grew to love?

  Thomas: I didn’t know how much of a “Boss Lady” Julia would become. When we were dating in college, I was the one who was always focused on school and business — I used to tutor her in business and math classes. Since getting married and growing our business together, I’m amazed everyday by the ways that she’s grown as a “Boss Lady”. Julia knows what she wants and she stops at nothing to get there.

  Julia: One of my favorite qualities of his, and one that I really admire, is his passion for teaching others. He really finds so much joy in sharing what he’s learned or what he knows to help others understand it too. And it’s not just a one-word answer or a brief explanation, he’ll go out of his way to make it a priority- whether that be for family, friends or strangers.

  What is your biggest pet peeve about Julia/Thomas?

  Thomas: Julia is a neat freak (her answer to this question is probably that I’m a slob) which typically there’s nothing wrong with, but most times she’s cleaned up the kitchen while I’m still in the middle of cooking. Somehow, she gets set in a cleaning autopilot mode and she doesn’t even notice I’m still cooking.

  Julia: He is THE messiest chef (but he makes up for it with some pretty damn good food!). I try and clean up after him while he’s cooking, which really annoys him. I’ve learned to just let him do his thing in the kitchen, but it does drive me nuts that he leaves every door and cabinet open in the process, along with all of the ingredients spilled out everywhere. He’s always said that if he were to start a cooking blog it would be called, A Delicious Mess.

  What is one skill Julia/Thomas has that you don’t excel in?

  Thomas: Julia is a finisher. When Julia sets her mind to do something, it gets done. It doesn’t matter if takes until 2 or 3 am, she won’t leave something 50% completed. It’s a skill I’ve always admired about her.

  Julia: He remembers everything. He’s a wealth of knowledge and random facts, hence why he loves Jeopardy. I think he remembers every single thing he’s learned in Science, Math and History from pre-k to college. I’m pretty much the opposite. I get 99% of facts wrong in the stories I tell or repeat.

  What does Julia/Thomas do that makes you feel better after a bad day?

  Thomas: Well she doesn’t cook but she always encourages me to order “pancakes for the table” as we like to call it.

  Julia: Thomas is the best at calming me down and making me feel good. He does my absolute favorite thing which is “tickle” me- either my back or arm or leg. I go into a trance state, like a bunny on its back.

  What is something only you know about Julia/Thomas?

  Thomas: You probably know already that Julia loves tickles. Tickle her back, her feet, give her tickles and she’ll love you for it. What you probably didn’t know is that she’s a self sleep tickler. Some nights she’ll be dead asleep and she’ll raise one arm straight up in the air as she tickles her own arm with the biggest smile on her face — if only she would tickle herself when awake.

  Julia: He makes amazing nicknames for everyone. I think every single person we’re friends with has some sort of strange nickname that he’s made up. He probably has 10 for me…that I won’t even get into!

  What is one of your funniest travel moments together?

  Thomas: Julia doesn’t take no for an answer and she’s pretty great at finding a solution to our problems. Getting into a full restaurant without a reservation? Easy. Bad weather spoil our plans for the day? No problem, she’ll make new ones. But there’s one instance during our travels that comes to mind where she tried every trick in the book and still got told no.

We were at Ashford Castle in Ireland, a gorgeous estate that has two separate areas for lodging: the castle or the lodge. We had to book the lodge as there were no more rooms available in the castle. As guests, we were allowed anywhere on the property except for inside the castle. That’s ok, we would just show ourselves in and act like we were meant to be there. The only thing stopping us? The kindest 80ish year old man you’ll ever meet standing guard making sure no one entered that wasn’t allowed to.

As Julia tries to walk into the castle:

80 year old guard: “Excuse me only guests are allowed inside. Are you staying at the castle?”

Julia: “We are staying at the lodge. Can we come in and look at the castle?”

Guard: “No I’m afraid not.”

J: “We can’t even take a look?”

Guard: “Em, No.”

J: “Is there a restaurant?”

Guard: “Yes.”

J: “Well then we will go have tea in the restaurant.”

Guard: “No, I’m afraid you can’t do that.”

J: “I can’t even take a little peak inside?”

Guard: “Em……….No.”

J: “So there’s not a single scenario in which I can go inside?”

Guard: “No, I’m sorry.”

J: “What if I just run passed you?”

She tried every trick in the book with no luck.

  Julia: In hindsight it’s funny and one that we always laugh about now, but in the moment…let’s just say we weren’t laughing (well, I was but Thomas was not!). We were visiting Avignon for the first time a few summers ago, and since it’s a walled city, the driving can be really confusing and difficult, as many of the streets you can’t drive down. But on top of that, the month of July is an annual arts festival, so you’re technically not allowed to drive into the city. But regardless of that fact, before arriving, our hotel (La Mirande), repeatedly told us that we actually could drive into the city to get to the hotel, but we had to follow the exact path from a pdf they emailed us.

The moment we arrived to the city is when it all started to fall apart. We drove in at the wrong entrance and right away realized we were definitely not in the right spot, as we were driving down the main street where ALL of the festival was happening. We were the only car and people were looking at us like we were nuts. Immediately Thomas started profusely sweating and panicking. There were a lot of “f” bombs dropped, as we slowly inched our car behind a crowd of hundreds of people. We literally had no idea what to do. We were driving a Volvo station wagon, which was really long and difficult to maneuver through the tiny narrow streets. After about 30 minutes of pure melt-down, we found an alley to drive down (I’m pretty sure we were going the wrong way) and got to a spot to pull the car over. On a map, the hotel wasn’t far, but because of the small one way streets, it was impossible to get the car there. At that point, I got out of the car and ran to the hotel to ask them for help.

When they saw where the car was, they couldn’t believe how we got there! We all started laughing hysterically when we were telling them the process that we took. Needless to say, we both needed a strong cocktail when we got back to the hotel.

When we visited Avignon last month, Thomas was having serious PTSD and refused to drive into the city.

  What is one thing Julia/Thomas can do that always makes you laugh?

  Thomas: She can tell a story or try to, at least. While we spend almost all of our time together, our versions of the same story often diverge far away from each other’s. The problem is we have different recollections of the past. I tend to remember the exact facts, while Julia remembers “loose details” and the feelings of the moment. Anytime Julia tells a story it almost always ends in laughs.

  Julia: He’s always making me laugh because he’s such a goof and cracks jokes all day long. But anytime he does a Kramer impersonation, I die laughing. Or anytime he dances!

  What movie best sums up Julia/Thomas? If you had to pick one actress to play her/him in a movie who would that be?

  Thomas: Under the Tuscan Sun comes to mind, aside from the life change in the movie that triggers her trip to Tuscany, I can definitely see Julia (and myself) finding a diamond in the rough of a house in Tuscany and turning it around. All while traveling around Italy and cooking delicious food. The obvious choice to play Julia would be Emma Watson, but I think only Diane Keaton can capture Julia’s character.

  Julia: Paul Rudd would definitely play him in a movie! The Lord of the Rings Trilogy, just because they are his favorite movies of all time and make me think of him (he made me watch all of them in one day when we were first dating!).

  What does Julia’s/Thomas’s dream day look like?

  Thomas: It all starts with waking up in Paris at the Ritz Paris in the Windsor Suite where I surprise her with breakfast in bed and a few gifts, including a gorgeous dress to enjoy the day in — maybe this Valentino or this Lela Rose for dinner. The day would be spent walking around the city followed by a casual lunch outside at a cafe as we enjoy our meal, sip rosé and people watch. In the evening, we’d find a rooftop bar to enjoy a bellini (her favorite drink) and watch the sunset immediately followed by a romantic dinner with a view of the Eiffel Tower.

  Julia: He would want to be somewhere with beautiful landscapes, like Alaska or Ireland (let’s pick Ireland since the golf is good) with his best friends. He would start the day off with breakfast burritos and huevos rancheros, then play a round of golf. In this dream scenario, I would be really good at golf, too (he’s been trying to teach me for years), and we would be killing it together. Mexican food and beer for lunch followed by another round of golf. Some sort of physical activity, like hiking, where he could also watch wildlife. The day would end with more Mexican food, some scotch and cigars.

  What is a story Julia/Thomas shares with a new person and you never want to hear them tell it again?

  Thomas: You haven’t met Julia unless she’s told you about when she was in 4H as a kid and she entered her pet store bought bunny, Roxy, into the rabbit competition. Roxy was disqualified because she didn’t have a tail and she wasn’t a purebred. Julia was devastated, but her spirits did pick up when she and Roxy won first place in the costume competition where she dressed Roxy in one of her American Girl Doll outfits. She tells the story so often that I’ll get direct messages from followers (or friends) anytime they find a cute bunny.

  Julia: Thomas LOVES to tell people that I’m really bad at tennis. Which in fact, I am NOT! There were a couple of times we played in SF where I wasn’t on my A-game and he is solely basing his opinion on those few times. We finally started playing here and there when we’re on vacation or traveling somewhere warm, in which he could barely keep up with me. He’s is just now admitting to people that he might have been wrong…

The post This Is What We Had To Say When We Answered 10 Questions About Each Other In Celebration Of Our 5 Year Wedding Anniversary appeared first on Gal Meets Glam.

First found here: This Is What We Had To Say When We Answered 10 Questions About Each Other In Celebration Of Our 5 Year Wedding Anniversary

[ookamirinchan]

Winter Vacation Pt. 1- Taipei

So...hi. It’s been a long time since I wrote anything for this blog...almost a year! Yikes!  Partly, that’s because I haven’t taken any really cool trips lately (well, except back to the States for a bit, but that, while fun, isn’t really something I needed to write about). But it was mostly due to simple lack of time. This year I took on what should have been a doable amount of work, which turned into insanity for many reasons and has left me equal parts too busy to even think about writing and free enough to want nothing more than a book or TV show without interruption. And so, even though I’ve had cool things I could have written about, good old RL has gotten in the way despite my best efforts. Oh well. Maybe I’ll play catch-up in a while and start writing about some of the cool stuff that’s happened over the last year(!), but for the time being, I’ll focus on my most recent trip over winter vacation.

This trip was a long time coming, as I’d been saying for over a year that I wanted to hit Vietnam before I leave Japan. Of course a quick Google search taught me that I needed a long time to spend in Vietnam, so I could hit all of the interesting areas in the very long country. And, you know, while I’m at it, I might as well hit Cambodia, too.

So initially, a pinball tour of Vietnam was planned with a follow-up of Phnom Penh and Siem Reap. But it turns out I’d need a long time to visit those places too (they’re surprisingly far apart), and I wound up deciding that I’d rather hit Ho Chi Minh City than visit Cambodia. So the trip became just Vietnam.

But then, when booking flights, I learned that pretty much all of the discount airliners en route to Hanoi have a layover somewhere. And one of these layovers was in Taipei. Taiwan is half-way between Japan and Vietnam...so why not stop there for a couple days? A quick search confirmed that I wouldn’t need a visa for Taiwan, and so that settled that. A twelve-day trip with 3 planned travel days, 2 days in Taipei, and 7 in Vietnam.

With so much travel involved (not to mention the general chaos of SE Asia), I knew it would be a stressful trip. But I hoped I could enjoy it anyway. And by the time winter vacation rolled around, after three months of non-stop stress and problems, I was so ready for some time away from everyone I didn’t even care where I was going or what I was going to do, just so long as I had an excuse to NOT respond to people’s messages for a couple weeks.

But, of course, my luck for the year was still against me, and I wound up with a monster case of strep throat two days before leaving. So that was fun. And by the time Tuesday night rolled around, I was still sick enough to heavily consider just not going. But I’d been to the doctor and I’d gotten my medicine, so against my better judgment I walked the 40 minutes to the station so I could take a train so I could catch a night bus headed to Osaka.

I didn’t feel much better that morning, and while I hung out in Osaka Station to pass the time before my mid-afternoon flight, I again contemplated just finding a hotel somewhere in Osaka, just skipping Taipei, and booking another flight to Hanoi for a couple days later. The decision was backed by a friend of mine questioning whether I’d make it through quarantine/customs with a 102 fever. She probably had a point. But thankfully, the fever broke later that morning while I was poking around the Pokemon Center and, though my throat still hurt, I figured the medicine was actually working and I should at least try to go.  

And so I went out to the airport and caught my 3-hour flight to Taipei.

The plane arrived around 7, but it was another hour before I’d gotten through the insane line at immigration. And then it was almost 8 before I could catch a bus to the city, and about 9 when I finally arrived.

I ate dinner from the supermarket under my hostel and went to bed.

---

My second day, I felt a little better, and I was glad to see the fever was still gone. And I was determined to make the day worth it.

I planned to take the metro out to Taipei 101 first, go up to the top and enjoy the views, and then head down to the south tip of the city. But as I was sitting on the metro, I decided it made more sense (because fewer transfers) if I just went south first and then went to Taipei 101 after. So down I went, near Taipei Zoo, which actually looked quite nice, though I wasn’t there for it. Instead, I walked just past the Zoo to the Maokong Gondola.

The Maokong Gondola runs up a mountain near the Zoo, and is popular with tourists for great views of the city and some quaint little teahouses at the top. I got there early, as soon as they opened, and so there wasn’t much of a line. I decided to try to the “Crystal Cabins,” which came highly recommended by the tourist sites.

Now, my first mistake was assuming that the wait would be short. There were only about 7 people in front of me for the crystal cabin (with no wait for the other cabins), but I waited for about 30 minutes. And on top of that, the crystal cabins aren’t actually see-through. Well, the bottoms are see-through, but what’s the point of that? Anyway, I wound up sharing a cabin with a young couple and their baby who spent half of the trip screaming and the other half sleeping. But despite the overcast weather of Taiwan in December, I still got some great views. And 20 minutes later, we pulled into the station at the top of the mountain.

Now, the thing to do at Maokong is to visit a teahouse. But the tea is so expensive. So forget that, I thought, and decided to explore the massive mountaintop a bit first. I passed a lot of teahouses of course, and some walking paths, and many, many cat statues.

I learned later that Maokong means “no cats.” Nobody’s really sure why the mountain was named this, except that maybe, at one time long ago, no cats lived on the mountain. So now, of course, they’ve fixed such a problem(?) with the statues. The more you know.

Anyway, I kept kidding myself into thinking I’d eventually stop at a teahouse, but I just kept walking. I followed a couple of the leisurely little walking paths off the main road and got some stunning views of the city (and what would be my only glimpse of Taipei 101).

When I made it back to the gondola finally, it was nearing noon and I was starting to get hungry. And so I looked at the teahouses again which, of course, only served tea. There were some street food stalls, but a quick glance there proved there wouldn’t be anything soft enough for my still-sore throat, and so I bought some dried fruit from the convenience store and rode back down the mountain.

I was eager to get on to the next attraction because I wanted to make sure I could visit everywhere I wanted to see (and Maokong had taken a lot longer than expected). I knew I could have gone out to Taipei 101 like I had planned (and I probably could have had a proper lunch there, too), but I decided against the out-of-the-way trip, instead heading directly to  the National Chiang Kai-shek Memorial Hall.

I was in a hurry to get there because I had no idea how long it would take to explore. And the pictures online made it look huge. So I figured I’d spend at least an hour there, probably more. But the memorial is just that--a memorial building, with not much to do in the area. There is a nice garden, but the two large buildings on either side are performance halls, neither of which were open during the day. I took a few pictures and left within 30 minutes, suddenly putting me way ahead of schedule.

I decided to stop by the Ximending shopping street for a while to pass the time before my next attraction. I walked for over an hour, but apart from some interesting advertisements, nothing really caught my attention.

I walked back over to the station, where I stopped by another highly recommended attraction, the Red House. This building was built about a century ago, and today is a center for cultural and performing arts. It’s the kind of place where you can go see traditional art being made (and probably pay to try making it yourself). It sounded like a lot of fun, but as I walked up to it, I noticed the face of the building was covered by a huge tarp, which had the picture of the building on it. “Under renovation,” it said, and I was sad.

Luckily, the art market under the building was still open, and I enjoyed shopping there for a little while before I gave up and took the train out to the next destination.

It was only about 3:30 when I got to Lungshan Temple, probably the most famous temple in Taiwan. When I arrived, it was overflowing with visitors (possibly because of the new year?) who were praying and waving incense around. I pushed my way around them through the temple a little, but gave up quickly, sure I was probably disturbing them by walking around and taking pictures.

And so ended the “daylight” part of my day’s plan, with still 2 hours of sun left. Now what?

I went into the metro for a little while to explore the shopping mall in the station which was pretty much non-existent. And then I decided to just walk around for a while until the sun set.

Luckily, I ran into Bopiliao Old Quarter, which is a nice historic district that’s famous for filmmakers and photographers. There are a lot of interesting old buildings there, as well as a deceptively huge museum where you can learn a lot about the district’s history.

I spent about an hour in the museum and then decided that, even though the sun hadn’t quite set yet, it was past 4:30, which meant the night markets should technically be open. I found the one near the station and walked for a few minutes, decided there wasn’t much of interest there, and chose to go try and find dinner somewhere else.

I went to Taipei Main Station, where I was sure I could find some restaurants. And after wandering the labyrinth of underground shops for another hour (mostly giving up on food and enjoying all the cool character merch I was finding), I finally found some food. However, none of it was Taipei food. I walked up and down the restaurant hallway passing Korean, Japanese, Chinese, frozen yogurt, Italian, and, of course, McDonald’s, before I finally found somewhere that looked promising. I went inside, played point to the picture and hope it’s good, and wound up with this:

It was hot and sour soup. Which would have been frustrating on a normal day since I absolutely can’t tolerate spicy, but it was even worse with my throat. I downed about half of it, trying to not seem too rude, and then ran down the hall to the frozen yogurt place. Then I gave up and stopped at the 7-11 down the street from my hostel for some take-out cup noodles (where I learned a fun fact--in Taipei, you have to request a plastic bag at the convenience store and pay for it. Which explained why everyone was eating in the convenience store. Who knew?).

That night, as I was eating my noodles in the hostel common room and planning the next day’s itinerary, I met a couple from Japan and a man who had lived in a bunch of different foreign countries. We talked for a long time, and by the time I escaped back to my room and finished my plan it was past midnight. Oops? I went to bed.

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Day 3 was a bit of a spur-of-the-moment adventure. Kind of.

When I was first planning this day, way back before December even started, I planned to head out to a national park near Taipei. It was easily accessible from the city and looked like it had some amazing sights and great hiking, which sounded like a lot of fun. I figured, if the weather was nice, I’d try to go up and enjoy it.

But then I got sick and I decided before I got on the plane that I probably wasn’t going to do any hiking. I’d just have to find something else to do instead.

But then I felt mostly better. And so I decided to still visit the park, just without all of the hiking I’d originally planned to do. Although it’s common to visit this park and hike from one side to the other (which I’d originally wanted to do), it was also possible to buy a shuttle bus ticket to hop-on-hop-off all day long and still see all the recommended sights.

And so, on day 3, I woke up super early and caught a bus from Taipei Main Station up to Yangmingshan National Park Bus Center, where I bought a ticket and caught the loop bus.

I first stopped at the Visitor’s Center, the first stop. Which was fine, except the visitor’s center was under renovation. So it was closed. And the shop was closed because it wasn’t 8:00 yet. So I sat at the bus stop for a while and tried to plan out the most event-filled tour of the park I could come up with while still finishing by about 2 in the afternoon (to leave time for my next plan, of course). While I waited, I started to regret not dressing more warmly for the cloudy, chilly mountain area. The springlike warm weather of Taipei didn’t quite stretch up to Yangmingshan.

Finally, the bus came and I rode it up to Erziping, a valley between two of the mountains with a couple ponds, a lovely view of one of the mountains, and a few hiking trails, about a 30-minute walk from the bus stop.

I walked there quickly, eager to see it and move on, but once I arrived, I decided I really wanted to hike around a bit. So despite not having any gear, I took a short hike out to a mountain peak, which I never actually reached because 600 meters worth of stairs. Still, I saw some interesting scenes and I was glad I went, despite the cold and my lack of food and water.

On the way back down, I met a local man who spoke a little English and probably came to the park all the time. The poor man was clearly trying to be helpful, and he asked me where I was going. I said I was going back to the bus stop, and he didn’t quite seem to understand that I intended to catch the bus to my next destination, which I had showed him on my map. “It’s too far,” he kept saying, and despite my clearly not having any sort of provisions or gear, kept trying to talk me into hiking to the other side of the park. It took about 10 minutes for me to convince him that I did intend to take the bus and that I knew exactly where I was going, and he conceded that it was doable. Then I ran away, back to the bus stop, before he could change his mind.

When I arrived at the bus stop, it was raining and was even colder than it had been that morning. I was glad when the bus came and we all crammed into the small space to ride off to the next destination, Xiaoyoukeng.

Xiaoyoukeng is a post-volcanic landscape on the side of the tallest mountain in the park. There you can see fumaroles and sulfur crystals on the mountainside.

It’s interesting, but it doesn’t take up the 30 minutes between busses, so I stopped for some warm food for lunch (and to buy gloves!), followed by a walk through a short bamboo trail and finishing off in the visitor’s center, which quite conveniently told me when the next bus would come. I caught it around 12:30, so cold and exhausted that I was quite certain I was just going to head back into the city.

I changed my mind on the bus, and, in a spur of the moment decision, hopped off at Quintiangang, a large grassland area on the mountain where settlers lived once upon a time. Now you can walk along a (surprisingly long) trail to see some of their settlement and, supposedly, some wild cows.

I didn’t see any cows or many buildings (though I walked for over an hour). But I did see quite a lot of cow poop, which proved they must have been hiding in the tall grass somewhere. And I also saw at least 3 brides, who were out having probably wedding photos taken, in their dresses, in the mud and rain. I sincerely hoped they’d already had the wedding.

I also climbed to the top of a small mountain while there, before heading back down to the visitor’s center to wait for the bus. It was here I learned that a bus would leave from Quintiangang that would go directly to Taipei Main Station, without me having to transfer at the Yangmingshan bus center. It was a lucky find, though everyone else had the same idea. I stood in the queue for almost 30 minutes so I could make sure to get on the bus and get a seat. And I was glad I had, because we must have piled about 50 people onto that bus. It was completely packed, so much so that we couldn’t pick anyone else up at any of the other stops we made. And we rode like that for an hour back into the city, where I got off near a station from where I could take the metro to Tamsui, my next destination. It was around 3:00 when I caught the train--right on schedule--and just before 4 when I arrived at Tamsui, a district on the northern tip of Taiwan that’s famous for its historic buildings, shopping, and gorgeous sunset on the ocean.

I walked around for a long time, weaving in and out of the shops and finally letting myself stop and buy some souvenirs. And some Totoro merch because the Totoro merch was everywhere and just so cute!

And, just as the sun was setting, I caught a boat from Tamsui to an island off the coast called Bali.

There, I shopped for a little while longer and got some street food for dinner, before taking the boat back to Tamsui and shopping some more. And once I was completely exhausted, I took the train back to the hostel (bypassing another plan I’d had to visit Taipei 101), showered, and slept.

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And thus ended (most of) my time in Taipei. It was definitely a fun visit, and I was really glad I’d decided to stop and enjoy it. Honestly it was a lot more fun than Vietnam was, and I hope I can go back some day. With money. Because seriously. So. Much. Merch. But it would also be cool to explore more of Taiwan. It looks like a beautiful little country. 

Next will be the very long post about Vietnam. So, um, stay tuned I guess.