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deeppenguinstudent · 20 hours

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Interaction of Foxes and Jean

Renee's phone beeped with an incoming message. Once again, it beeped before an onslaught of trills came from her phone. Jean glanced down at the phone that laid vibrating on top his bed and raised his eyebrow at Renee's ignorance.

She blinked twice before stretching her lips into a small smile, "It's okay, Dan is probably texting us about the take-out she's just bought. I can tend to them in a while. Please continue what you were saying."

"Don't be reckless, Renee," he chided her, the hypocrisy was chilling, "These are your...friends. I won't allow you to dispose of them for my sake."

Renee tilted her head, and her locks of rainbow gently brushed against her shoulder as she stared at him. For a moment, they stayed in silence, unblinking. He saw Renee scan his face with something kindred to softness before she grasped his hand and gently ghosted the veins along his palm.

"Can I?"

What a stupid question.

He let out a grunt of acknowledgement before he felt peppering kisses on the mottled scars on top of his skin. He felt faint. What was a winsome maiden doing beside him? Was he so accursed that every time a beautous person gave him a morsel of attention, he loses all his inhibition? His mind was befuddled, and images of rainbows morphed into a scenery of green. How ironic was it that his once favourite colour now haunted his daydreams?

He pulled back his hand as if burned. Renee stared at him with a perplexed emotion, yet she didn't mention anything. Renee was a saint. She didn't press on matters that didn't concern her. All she yearned for was to ensure that Jean got better. She didn't seek out anything from him. It wasn't a constant push and pull of a barrage of emotions like it was with Kevin in the Nest.

Renee loved him with her soul. But Jean's heart had always ever belonged to one person alone; that person, however, would never Jean see as anything off the court.

"You should go."

"I refuse. Abby is out with Wymack. You aren't permitted to be alone," Renee's tone held no room for argument. She doesn't say what's been gnawing deep within Jean's heart. She doesn't point out the fact that Kevin hadn't visited him after he returned from West Virginia with Wymack from the funeral. She doesn't say what's shattered his cracking heart into a pile of measly broken shards.

"I can handle myself."

"I don't doubt that; nevertheless, I'd feel more at ease if you have someone next to you."

Jean sighed, his hand fiddling his hair in faux vexation. He saw Renee's eyes follow his movement, and his skin crawled at that prospect.

Another shrill of Renee's phone interrupted his train of thought, his mouth responding faster than his mind, "Then invite them over."

Renee quirked up, her body now rigid at Jean's approval. It was something they'd been frolicking around for some time. Renee was sanguine that Jean would benefit from having more friendly faces around as it would enable him to form positive relationships, unlike in the Nest. Jean argued that his pragmatic and misanthropic nature would drive everyone away and probably cause a wedge between Renee's friends and her.

He regretted the assent the moment it left his mouth. In spite of that, as he saw Renee practically bouncing up in glee, he nodded once again to solidify his statement.

Renee kissed him on the cheek before exiting the room to presumably call Dan. He touched his cheek in astonishment and huffed with aggravation before it spread into a slight smile at Renee's enthusiasm.

-☆-

Jean really didn't understand how he got himself into this situation.

At first, only Dan Wilds was supposed to come over. Jean had heard stories of Dan, and he was intrigued by the captain's determination. Before Kevin joined the Foxes, Dan and her boyfriend, Matt, were a force that brought the Foxes' stability. He held down the fort while she twisted in the air and ricocheted the ball off the walls.

Afterwards, Allison barged into Jean's room with an exasperated countenance as she clung onto Renee and bemoaned on how unfair it was that she wasn't invited to the party to which Renee patted her affectionately on her elbow.

Jean and Renee's little bubble of comforted were poked with a needle by the upperclassmen's boisterous laughter and snarky jibes at each other. It was something akin to what he saw Neil and Kevin share; the kind of bond that was so utterly foreign to Jean that he didn't know how to join in.

His dire issue seemed to resolve itself as a somewhat tipsy Nicky Hemmick, along with the goalkeeper's twin, was texted an invite by Allison. Renee shot a disapproving glare at Allison but was pleasantly surprised at Nicky's antics as he managed to communicate with Jean and blindsided his standoffish behaviour with a jovial chuckle.

"Look, this line right here means that you are going to be reincarnated in your next life," Nicky traced Jean's palms with a shaky line as he tried to recall some crash course he took eons ago back in conversion camp. Jean was flabbergasted at how quickly he found comfort in Nicky's presence. Perhaps it was because he was openly gay and unabashed at his sexuality; Jean swallowed his thoughts, and he quietly wondered whether Nicky would understand his feelings for loving a boy who was painfully straight. Whether what he went through in conversion camp was similar to what Jean went through in the Nest based on Riko's orders.

"Now that's a good question," Allison perused Jean before taking a long, languid sip of her wine, "What animal would you like to be reincarnated as? Personally, I would like to be a flamingo in my next life."

Jean gazed at his palms where Nicky massaged his wounds gently for a second before quipping up, "A duck."

The room went silent before Allison chortled, and the rest of the room let out a roar of guffaws. Embarrassment tinged at Jean's cheeks before he pressed on Nicky's hands out of reflex. He turned his head and saw Renee huffing a small laugh before feeling infinitely betrayed.

"What? Why are they laughing?" He questioned, directing his question straight at the only one not laughing, Aaron.

He shrugged his shoulders before Renee shook her head, explaining that she expected him to pick a ferocious animal like a black panther. It wasn't humorous. Instead, she found it overwhelmingly endearing, to which everyone raised their glasses of stolen alcohol from Abby's cupboard in agreement.

"I expected you to be self-absorbed, heinous asshole like Kevin, but you really are just forcing a facade of impudence," Nicky let go of Jean's hands in a favour of swirling the forgotten wine next to his leg on the floor under the bed, "If I knew how you actually were, I would've shot my shot back in the first banquet itself."

Jean didn't want to let the words sink in. Being flirted with, even jokingly, was doing more for his heart that he would have liked. Being chased by someone and chasing someone else was entirely different - it was obvious to Jean which side of the same of coin he would like to be on. He now understood why Thea had strung along so many guys only to snip off their ties at the last second.

Renee was his saviour, a saving grace that had pulled him out of the ocean when it had mattered the most. Now, Nicky was the man tethering the anchor of the raft Renee had made for him and tied it to an immovable object. Only them at sea, only them who would ever know if a tryst ever occurred.

It was tempting, so tempting to reach out to Nicky's glass and take a swig of acrid liquor just to see a reaction of something other than bottomless guilt in someone's eyes. He would have uttered: 'What's stopping you?' Before leaning into Nicky's touch and giving him goosebumps like Kevin had done numerous times to him before. Alas, the alluring green eyes had to always torment his mind until all he could imagine was Kevin, Kevin, Kevin. Only this time, it wasn't in Jean's fantasy

The door creaked open before opening with a large bang that made Allison jump in her seat.

"For Fuck's sake Kevin, you made me get wine on my new blouse," Allison screeched as she haphazardly wiped down her shirt with a tissue paper, cursing as it did nothing to alleviate the stain.

Standing at the door was Kevin Day, and behind him were Neil Josten and Andrew Minyard; Jean shut his eyes, exhaling a low tantalising breath that made Nicky quirk up his eyebrow in question beside him.

"You did that to yourself," Kevin replied with indifference before looking around the room, "What are you guys doing here? Jean needs rest. He can't afford to have company right now."

"Don't act as if you know what's best for me," Jean addressed Kevin in French, which piqued the room's attention at their little exchange. Even Aaron lifted up his head and scrutinised Kevin's face while he munched on his dinner.

Dan huffed out her disapproval, "You keep stowing him away like some damsel in distress, Kevin. It isn't healthy for him to be locked up in here for so long."

Matt carded his hands through Dan's hair, placating her rising irritation, "Besides, it's not as if we are the ones bothering him. Moreau begrudgingly requested our acquaintance, so we decided to have dinner here to keep him company."

Renee nodded her head when Kevin turned to her for confirmation.

Kevin ran his fingers through his wet hair, Jean willed himself not to look at the droplets that fell on the white shirt Kevin was now changed into, "If you wanted company, you should've called either Neil or me, Jean."

Jean felt his anger bubbling. His lip was bitten raw, and it felt like he was in the Nest once again with all eyes on him and Kevin; always waiting for one of them to slip up so they could steal their spot beside Riko in perfect court. If it was up to Jean, he would have willingly given up his position and bared the punishment of death. Yet because of one stupid promise, he would never be able to attain the solace of the afterlife on his own whims. Maybe Ichirou would finish the job himself and shoot him like he did with Riko.

"Would you have even come?" He saw Neil's confused face and the distress whirling in those sickening green eyes when Jean spat out the words in Japanese. The language Jean once loathed was now the only semblance of privacy Kevin and him would ever get. It was laughably torturous.

A cold hand pinched his cheek, and he felt a neck pressing against his shoulder with a hand thrown at the side of his hip. He didn't even notice Nicky had changed his position until he could see Kevin's little goalkeeper burning holes into the sight before them. Jean thought nothing of the ghastly stares around the room as Nicky flopped onto his lap and started snoring.

"Did you consent?" Andrew voiced. His face remained impassive, but he side stepped Kevin to move closer to them until he was looming above Jean.

Andrew repeated the question again. Whispers susserated across the room, and Neil's mouth was tight-lipped as he looked at the scene pensively - involuntarily glancing at Kevin from time to time.

Then, a chuckle. It felt foreign to Jean's ears. It had barely registered until he realised it was his own. Throughout the night, he had barely even smiled, yet a simple question with Andrew's domineering presence had reduced him to a small fit of bitterly dry laughs.

It was such an incredulous question. Jean didn't consent when he was pushed down to his knees. Jean didn't consent when Riko had craved around Grayson's bitemark on his chest to forever sear in his memory what had transpired that night. Jean didn't consent when they etched his skin with bruises and defamed his names with vile rumours. Jean didn't consent because he never thought he could ever have a choice; he was a Moreau, and they are to serve the Moriyamas and endure everything thrown to them because they are nothing but worthless property.

Jean was laughing because the first time he was ever asked, the words he would have slit his wrists over and over again in the Nest to hear, was now being presented to him for something as innocuous as a simple touch across his lap. The question he yearned to hear in the dead of the night by the boy standing less than 10 meters away: 'Did you consent?'

Andrew stared at him blankly, and Jean gazed upon Renee's saddened smile. He felt his neck start to burn.

"Take your team and leave me alone, Kevin."

Kevin gritted his teeth, "You know we can't do that. You're still under... surveillance."

"Leave me the fuck alone, Kevin!" Jean had yelled in French, startling the Nicky awake. Within an instant, Renee started ushering out everyone out of the room. Kevin stood at the entrance, with guilt wallowing in his eyes.

Jean hated it. He hated how Kevin was the last to leave the room. He hated how Kevin cleaned up the food on the floor left behind by the others without complaint. He hated how he could feel regret coiling up in his stomach as he watched Kevin bring a new pair of bandages. He hated how Kevin folded the bandages around Jean's wounds like it was second nature. He hated how Kevin's touch sent electric sparks down his spinal cord, unlike Renee had ever done before. He hated how Kevin's lips gently brushed over the wounds. He hated how that almost brought him to tears. He hated how much he wanted those lips to brush against his.

He hated Kevin.

He hated that he could never learn to resent Kevin despite everything he had done to him.

#aftg #jean moreau #kevin day #kevjean #neil josten #andrew minyard #allison reynolds #dan wilds #matt boyd #renee walker #jeanee #kind of #aaron minyard #nicky hemmick #fanfiction #fanfic

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