#((even less so when he's trapped in an insane asylum))

[fantastic-nonsense]

"The Arkham things is not canon, no. But with all the context, the idea isn't so much of a leap as a tripping over one's shoelaces to get there."

No, it's a huge leap regardless of context. Tim in canon has absolutely no reason to believe Dick wants to send him to Arkham. That's something that's never even implied by the text of any comic, much less something that Tim needs to mentally refute in-universe to himself. IRL, thinking that Dick wanted to send Tim to Arkham requires you to blatantly ignore several years of comic canon and more specificially the entirety of how Dick and Tim's relationship was portrayed from Infinite Crisis through the Reborn era.

Even starting at the basic foundations of the idea, you can see how ridiculous it is. Arkham Asylum's full name is the "Elizabeth Arkham Asylum for the Criminally Insane." Tim is not a criminal nor is he insane. Neither Dick nor Tim in-universe have any reason to think that Tim being there is an option that's even in the same room as the several other alternatives that exist, much less on the table!

Jean Loring gets sent to Arkham before Red Robin, so Tim has no reason to think people from the hero-sphere are exempt if they do something egregious enough. Jason Todd has already been to Blackgate once (and I think is sent to Arkham later?) so he knows former Bats / Wayne family members being imprisoned is on the table.

Jean ended up in Arkham because she killed Sue Dibny and covered it up by faking her own attempted murder. Her fate had nothing to do with the Batfamily's personal views on Arkham and should not be taken as such. Jason ended up in Arkham because he attempted to kill the Batfam on multiple occasions and then decided to go on a murder spree of petty criminals while broadcasting their deaths on social media. The circumstances behind Jason ending up in Arkham (which were largely out of Dick's power to control, as I pointed out here) are dramatically different from anything related to Tim's grief over Bruce's supposed death.

Pretending like "Dick wanted to send Tim to Arkham" has any sort of understandable textual support also flat-out ignores that Dick himself had just been trapped and tortured in Arkham by the Black Glove less than a month (in-universe) before Bruce died, during Batman R.I.P. Which Tim knows about because he was there, trying to track down an MIA Bruce and deal with Steph coming back from the grave. It was a big deal and we got a whole arc about Dick cleaning up corruption within Arkham and fighting Jeremiah Arkham during his time as Batman out of it!

If I also recall correctly, no one suggested Tim get any kind of counseling when Janet, Jack, or numerous friends were killed....But no one says "hey kiddo, let's get you a therapist" after Janet's murder. or Jack's.

Bruce, Dick, and Tim took a year-long vacation from normal vigilantism after those events and went globetrotting in an attempt to retrace Bruce's original training journey during his youth and "find themselves." That was the entire plot of them being absent from Gotham during 52/One Year Later, which was used to introduce Kate Kane as Batwoman and kickstart the Evil Cass arc. Bruce went off to go meditate in a cave in Nanda Parbat for two months and Dick and Tim spent that time healing and taking down Intergang in Europe. We know that Dick and Tim talked a lot about Tim's losses during that year off, because it's why Dick is so shocked that Tim is doing so poorly in Resurrection of Ra's al Ghul:

“Tim doesn’t say anything. And I realize…he doesn’t care. He’s been so hurt this last year and a half…lost so much…I thought we’d gotten past it…or started to deal with it…were Bruce and I just believing what we wanted to?”

Dick's suggestion that Tim see a therapist in Metropolis needs to be viewed not in the context of Dick "breaking an earlier pattern" but in the context of Dick thinking that Tim was starting to heal from all of his losses and then being violently reminded that Tim is not, in fact, doing fine. We know what's different this time: Dick watched Tim have a breakdown beside a Lazarus Pit less than three months prior and then saw him go through yet another loss, seemingly go into denial over it, and then push away all attempts of his family and friends to reach out to him in the aftermath. From Dick's perspective, Tim broke down in his arms three months ago and is now a) pushing everyone in his life away after the death of yet another loved one and b) denying Bruce is dead. That's why Dick reacts differently. And it's a perfectly understandable and reasonable reaction that doesn't really require any further thought than that, to be honest.

Thinking that there's any support for the Arkham suggestion also requires ignoring Dick's canonical response to Tim's denial of Bruce's death, the fact that Tim was pushing everyone away in the aftermath of Bruce's death and refusing to explain anything he was thinking, and that Dick and Tim were shown to still have a very strong bedrock of love and trust in each other even at the rockiest point in their relationship. It's not just missing a single line in a single comic issue; it's refusing to engage with the entirety of Dick and Tim's canon relationship before, during, and after Bruce's death.

Frankly, I think you're attempting to justify an inherently unreasonable fanon concept to yourself by desperately grasping at tiny snippets of canon that 99.9% of people who work with the concept don't even know about.

People who engage with "Dick wanted to put Tim in Arkham" are not doing so based on the knowledge that Jean Loring got sent to Arkham after Identity Crisis or that Tim's stepmom was institutionalized after Jack's murder; they largely don't even know that Tim has a stepmom. They don't actually know enough canon to make an informed assessment on the topic at all. They just made it up for extra angst points because it's a fun little way in their minds to make Tim even more of a poor little meow meow character, and then it fell victim to the fandom telephone problem! It's just a ridiculous assertion that requires some heavy character assassination and a blatant refusal to actually engage with canon on any level, and it needs to be viewed in that context.

Obligatory reminder that Dick Grayson did not ever even consider sending Tim to Arkham

This is what he said-

He wanted Tim to talk to a therapist. One from Metropolis no less, so not even Arkham adjacent in any way.

And for more context here, these are the other things Dick said-

I’m not saying Tim was wholly in the wrong for not explaining himself or anything like that. And I understand that sometimes it’s fun to woobify Timbo a bit by writing fics and things were everyone was against him during this time and all of that. I get that.

But I also want everyone to know that Dick did not ever canonically do that.

Dick did not do everything right by any means, but he never wanted to send his little brother to Arkham. That is purely fanon.

[why-this-kolaveri-machi]

the wolf should’ve been afraid of me.

Titans 3.04

just under the wire! ... i hope.

like with the previous review, i’m typing this up as i see the episode. here we go!

spoilers ahead.

1. ... well. that was an interesting cold open.

1.25. i don’t know whether to admire this show’s restraint when it comes to gotham and its excesses, particularly arkham asylum. it’d be easy to go hammer and tongs, like suicide squad (2016) did, or any number of bat media did, at a tropey, colourful~~insanity~~ that can be quite damaging, casting mental illness in strangeness and criminality. it definitely shows gotham as... separate from the rest of the country, its own ecosystem of heroes and villains, a sort of rogue state. 

but that ecosystem is still human, with its heroes needing to clip parts of themselves away just to survive, growing old and needing to be recycled, its villains languishing in the same kinds of systems that fail everybody else who needs to be helped. it’s a quieter, tenser sort of wrongness: not strange enough that you can dissociate, but not close enough that you can completely empathise. gotham is its own creature.

1.5. i know that the reasoning behind this is more doylist than anything, but i’m so glad that joker was killed off with little fanfare right at the start of the season. he is the one man in the batverse that’s transcended its confines as this sort of ethereal boogeyman/eternal edgelord and to justify his presence in the series would mean giving him this tired, overblown importance and too much of a stab at colourful, tropey “madness” in this otherwise-subdued series. i wish all batmedia would follow suit and get rid of this fucker.

1.75. so jason is bucking scarecrow’s control! or reminding him of who exactly holds all the cards right now. circling back to what i talked about in the last review, it’s remarkable just how little time it’s been since jason’s “death” and he’s already got ‘minions’ and elaborately set up plans to track, break and kill the titans. just how long has he been planning this? when did he first look at WE weapons prototypes and think that’s something i can use to blow somebody up? and the most unsettling question: did he plan his own death at the hands of the joker just so that he could break batman?

at this point it’s obvious that the scarecrow at least started jason down this path, but it’s frightening just how far he’s travelled already.

1.8. aaagh, less than one minute in! i’ll shut up. 

2. conner washing his hands at the sink reminds me that he was directly in the line of explosion when hank got blown up and he’s probably got atomised hank-bits all over his skin that he’s desperately trying to wash off.

... you’re welcome.

2.25. conner, don’t you speak to gar fucking logan like that, sir, no!

2.3. if anything it’s the lex part of him that gave him the knowhow to recognise the weapon and build a de-activator for it. 

anyway, for that ‘half-breed’ and ‘talking tiger’ comment?

(i wish, tho, that we actually see conner more interested in the superman part of his legacy, like maybe listening to stories from gar, or even better, dick, so we get a better idea of the pressure he’s feeling to live up to that part of him and not the part that’s lex.)

((i talked about conner’s stages of moral development in his introductory episode last season, but i wonder if the next stage of his self-actualisation would be to further integrate the parts of himself and realise that they are only parts and he, conner, is an entirely different person unto himself that can make decisions on how to use what he has and what he knows. his superman abilities can be used to destroy. his lex knowledge can be used to save.))

3. oh dawn :((

3.25. is this the last we see of dawn and hank? i mean, we know donna is coming back; would it be a stretch to think they’ll try to have a go at resurrecting hank as well?

3.5. “deathstroke didn’t make us into killers.” good, because deathstroke didn’t make jason a killer either. there’s a missing step there you need to be looking for, dick. 

3.75. dick did try to break the cycle, step away from gotham, run from the possibility that he could turn into batman. it didn’t help; he couldn’t fully withdraw from his vigilante persona the same time he loathed it, and batman literally haunted him both asleep and awake. but maybe gotham doesn’t have to turn anybody into anything. maybe gotham has nothing to do with it at all. it’s about taking responsibility, realising some sacrifices are pure bullshit, and building an actual family instead of merely a team.

anyway: hugs!

(oh, also? mr “i hate flying”? i mean, there’s perfectly valid reasons to hate flying that’s not related to childhood trauma, but then again, this guy was literally a ‘flying grayson’ once. also also, remember that he also gets sea-sick. must’ve a lot of fun stories to tell.)

4. ooh that gar/kory confrontation was brief but cool!

listen, i have never seen a psychiatrist with that extravagant an office and SIR I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW HOW--

4.5. kory’s so unused to reaching out for help and it’s breaking my heart that HPG likely is some kind of impostor that’s maybe causing her symptoms in the first place. 

kory and dick have mostly been apart this season but it’s remarkable how their journeys have paralleled each other; kory processes her grief, isolation and existential dread into a determination to take care of this new family she has, no matter what it takes; dick does much the same, forging ahead with plans and solutions until he has no fuel left in him and spirals into a massive breakdown.

4.25. listen titans this really is a TERRIBLE continuity error. we aren’t goldfish; we can clearly remember that two minutes ago it was gar’s upper arm that was burned, not his forearm. COME ON.

“sensory deprivation tank” *SNORT*

anyway, gar is the BEST

4.5. i wonder where these visions of experimentation took place. was it on tamaran, or on earth, after she came to hunt down rachel/trigon and before she lost all her memories? is HPG a part of the scientist group that experimented on her? ... god, i hope not. i mean, i think he is, but it would be cool to have some positive therapist representation in media. 

5. you’d think the van transporting a dangerous supervillain that only batman could catch would be more secure but... i’m also not entirely surprised. 

5.15. i love dick gives ZERO shits about hiding himself or even ensuring scarecrow is adequately contained. just turns away after kidnapping him in BROAD DAYLIGHT and says ‘let’s go’. I LOVE THIS DUMBASS

6. lmao gar is having a really really shitty day SOMEONE GIVE THIS MAN A BREAK or just a goddamn story arc of his own

6.5. i’m really confused about the timeline here. so... sometime ago, kory came down to earth to hunt down trigon, yeah? at some further point down the line she and her sister were kidnapped and experimented on. THEN she somehow escapes but... loses her memory? a few months pass and then we see blackfire alive and well and free; she kills faddei, can impersonate other people, and is clearly seeking out kory. but now she’s still in the experiment facility...? what’s going on?

i’m not entirely surprised about the facility being mostly deserted. either the biggest investors in this project gave up on it and it was left to the most fanatic to carry on, or they were deliberately trying to lure kory and get her to free blackfire--expand the environs of the experiment, so to speak.

7. hopefully barbara is going to get something to do other than listen to various men give her Attitude

8. how do you terrorise a terrorist? well:

i love when dick is a scary-competent motherfucker.

8.25. ooooh, the attack on crane at arkham a ploy to get crane to blackgate? nice one dick, i didn’t even think of that. but why though? to protect crane from the titans? to intercept the van to blackgate and “rescue” him? seems likely--red hood was there, except dick got to crane quicker.

9. still reeeallly unclear about the komand’r situation. was komand’r captured after s2? is this all A TRAP?? if so, why are you stepping into the only thing that can contain you, kory????

9.25. so... definite parallels between dick/jason and kory/kom here. i’m just. i’m still. really confused. i’ll shut up now.

10. this may be my favourite dick look yet:

woodsman!dick in a beanie.

10.5. i unironically love how titans has made this bizarrely-devoted-to-his-moniker, toxin-spewing supervillain into a tamer version of hannibal, psychoanalysing his victims into submission. it’s of a piece with how inward looking titans is, the way all of its villains are obsessed with how our protagonists’ minds work, to the point where they would actually spend time inside of them. 

there are no big plots to end the world. no apocalypses or endgames here. these villains collect the titans’ insecurities like infinity stones. the way the titans defeat them is by achieving character growth--literally winning by the power of love. literally “the real superpower is the friends we made along the way”!

10.7. anyway, i’m betting dick is used to this bullshit from crane and is humouring him in the service of getting more information. the story about the wolf? an implicit threat, not to mention dick getting to control what crane knows about him and what methods he would use to manipulate him.

am i giving dick too much credit here? i don’t think so. he’s really impressed me so far this season.

10.75. like. there’s a real unreliable narrator vibe coming off with every person that talks about bruce (much like how the various members of the titans talked about jason’s motivations) and to buy into crane’s talk about bruce being a psychopath is to fall for the same manipulation that jason fell for. dick is the only person who hasn’t really psychoanalysed bruce this season, and i think some part of his detective brain is piecing things together into a bigger picture.

11. i’m glad kory rescued kom but did she have to kill the scientist?

(i mean, yeah, probably - the less people know that kom escaped the less likely they’re going to have the fucking govt on their doorstep, but still.)

11.5. dick’s gonna come back to wayne manor, stare straight at komand’r and go, well which room would you like? because the team might as well adopt ANOTHER person, yeah?

12. oh MAN that red hood/nightwing fight was AMAZING! and he did the thing! the boomerang escrima thing! i’m so delighted!

12.5. the anger and disbelief in dick’s voice when he says you told crane EVERYTHING?! tells me that he knew exactly what he was telling crane himself.

12.75. “everything you are is because of him” - oh that reminds me of halluci!bruce from last season. i hope we see halluci!bruce again--he is so vicious but so entertaining... so much more effective at tearing dick down than crane or jason combined. goes to show that dick’s biggest enemy is own fucking head.

12.8. oh no! dick’s shot! crane is in the wind with red hood! blackfire is now with the titans! i love it!

honestly this season’s pacing is such a big step up from the last couple. gold star, show.

[huihuiheart]

Goretober D18 - I Plead Insanity - Hyunjin

Pairing: Hyunjin x Gender Neutral Reader

Warnings: Insane asylums, stalker themes, kidnapping, Hyunjin calls reader pretty because it seems like what he’d do regardless of gender (lets face it anyone can be pretty), cursing.

Honestly this seems more like a teaser that I’ll be turning into a series later, but I mean...........

Word Count: 760 

You knew that telling the guards escorting you into the building that you weren’t crazy wouldn’t manage to accomplish anything, they were trained to ignore that kind of stuff constantly being told to them. You’d have to come up with something more substantial, something to get there attention, and be convincing. Yet, in the heat of the moment panic sets in and you appear just as troubled as everyone else here desperately trying to yank yourself free from the hold of the guards, frantically yelling out to anyone who might listen and try to help you. How you’d even ended up here you couldn’t be certain of, there had been no warnings or precursors. Not until you ended up in the room where your fate would be decided, though you’d had no concerns until the head doctor from the asylum they were currently dragging you into started to speak. He was smooth the way he weaved “the signs” of your problems into every argument against it that any other doctor could come up with.  The devil himself waiting for you to arrive just inside the doors, smile sickeningly sweet. Hwang Hyunjin acting as if nothing was wrong, as if he hadn’t ripped your freedoms away in the blink of an eye.

“I’ll take from here gentlemen, thank you.” Hyunjin gives them a small nod in parting, grabbing your bicep to lead the way. Grip firm only to sigh softly once you get somewhere with less people, “Y/N! Stop fighting, even if you get out the doors are locked anyways, would you rather deal with me or security?” 

“Security anytime.” You hiss out at him eyes narrowing and he raises a brow in surprise, watching you closely. Though is anything he seemed amused and rather calm, not that he had any reason to be otherwise it was obvious he’s the one that ran things here and everything went how he said it would.

“Oh? And why is that pretty?” His tone is condescending and if you weren’t worried about digging yourself a deeper grave you’d likely have slapped the smirk clear off his face. 

“I don’t know.....maybe it has to do with the fact that security isn’t the reason I’m stuck in this hell hole. Wrongly condemned here at that!” You scoff and Hyunjin only rolls his eyes and drags you off again, taking you into a plain white room with a bed, likely yours, “ When I get out of here, you better watch your fucking back Hwang Hyunjin, or your license, reputation, power, money, I’ll make sure it’s all ripped from you in a second just like you did to me.”

Hyunjin laughs at you, mischief sparkling in his eyes, “Oh pretty that’s cute, you think you can get out of here without my approval. You see though....no one comes in or out without my say so. Not even other doctors. So good luck swinging that one.”

“Okay, fine! Answer me this then, Why am I even here in the first place?” You cross your arms looking at him incredulously knowing what he spewed in court was a bunch of bullshit. 

“To get help of course pretty.” Hyunjin coos brushing some hair out of your face, smirk returning as you swatted his hand away. He loved your feisty side, but he was really looking forward to trying to break that at least around him and get you to behave.

“And I’m calling bull, just like I did who knows how many times already. I’m not insane and you know it!” Your jabbing your finger into his chest without even knowing. Yet, Hyunjin stands his ground not bothered in the least by your actions.

His smirk returns looking over your seething form in satisfaction, “Oh I know pretty. That’s exactly why you won’t be getting out of here. I can fake your problems indefinitely if I have to, considering there’s not even anything to cure.”

“You’re no doctor. You don’t want to help anyone, but yourself! You’re just a monster!” You call after him as Hyunjin makes his way to the door once more, turning to let you take in his playfully smug expression again. He shrugs slightly at you, not bothered by the words you so hatefully spewed at him. Not bothered at all, simply prepared to speak the words that would make you realize just how much of a monster the man who’d gotten you trapped here was. His patients not the ones who needed help, but he certainly was.

“What can I say pretty?.... I plead insanity.....”

[gayenerd]

Green Day Deals with the "Rock Star" Dookie 

by Tom Lanham 

(First appeared in BAM Magazine, March 10, 1995)

 Young, loud, and snotty equals beaucoup bucks? What pencil-pushing, graph-charting trend spotter could've predicted it? But the facts speak for themselves: As of late February, Dookie--the brattish, snap 'n' snarl Reprise salvo from Berkeley's sloppy punk trio, Green Day--has sold six million copies. Six million. Chances are, somebody on your block is jumping up and down in his living room at this very moment to the scrap-metal power chords and ardent apathy of "Longview," "Burnout," "Basket Case," or "When I Come Around" and getting lost in the teen abandon of these testy 22-year-olds--weasel-voiced, Montgomery-Clift-like charismatic singer/guitarist Billie Joe; tom-tom tribal percussionist Tre Cool (of the ever-morphing hair-color fame); and bassist Mike Dirnt (who survived Green Day's appearance at Woodstock '94, although several of his teeth did not). 

Yes, punk rock is a marketable phenomenon these days, leaving many involved with the music's initial late-'70s, early-'80s wave scratching their heads, wondering why it didn't take the first time around. Public reaction started as curiosity ("Hey, honey, c'mere and lookit these goofy, green-haired little whippersnappers in an insane asylum on MTV!"), but spiraled up to rock-diet necessity (Green Day just won Grammy and they're nominated for quite a few Bammies as well, including such categories as Outstanding Group, Outstanding Album, and Outstanding Song--"Longview" and "Basket Case"). The fact that they've been nominated at all probably sends a shiver up the old dinosaur backbones of Eddie Money, Huey Lewis, and Boz Scaggs, a time-creepy feeling of "Gee, what the hell do we do now?" Because this isn't just some flash-in-the-pan punk movement, folks--this is a youth movement; Green Day are, as they hiply term it, "bored in the 'burbs," and reaching out, through TV and radio, like some prodigal preachers to other American kids who sense the same slacker ennui. Obviously, we're talking truckloads of kids. 

Ironically, the more fame edges into the Green Day ruffians' lives, the more mature they seem to become. They've turned down all interview requests as of late, even People magazine, preferring to lay low until this tide of interest recedes. Billie Joe got married last autumn, and spent his honeymoon--not in any exotic, expensive locale--but in Berkeley's grand old Claremont Hotel. Cool recently became a father, and Billie Joe's child is due any day now. It's a responsibility they've both eagerly undertaken. Rob Cavallo, the boys' coproducer and A&R man at Reprise, swears they're "old souls, the smartest young kids I've ever met." It rings true. 

The first time I spoke with Green Day, in January of '94, Cool, Dirnt, and Billie Joe were lazing around their dingy basement apartment in Berkeley, sitting on chairs and couches with potentially painful springs poking through. Rock 'n' roll bubblegum cards were scattered across a coffee table, along with several bongs of various sizes, plus a four-and-a-half foot red plastic pipe dubbed "Bongzilla" leaned against a doorway. The only wall decoration, besides a Ren & Stimpy poster, was a Twister game mat nailed up in its entirety, presumably for high-schoolish humor's sake. 

When I'd met Billie Joe a few months earlier at a campus concert, his hair was dyed lime-green and featured squidlike tufts. Now it was dark brown, with only two tufts remaining, and both his ears and nose had piercings. Periodically during the interview, he'd ram a finger into that pierced nostril, rummage around, then stare idly at the resultant booger before flicking it on to the carpet. Cool wandered out of the rec room for several minutes, but returned, red-eyed, to proudly proclaim, "Lookit me! I'm stoned, dude!" Dirnt--when he wasn't strumming an acoustic guitar--kept watching their windowsill Sea Monkey tank, finally noting, "Hey, these Sea Monkeys look just like sperm!" 

Despite all these schoolboy, poo-poo wit trappings (dookie, after all, is kiddie slang for excrement), there was a sense of seasoned wisdom about them, a feeling that they were, as Cavallo postulated, truly old souls. Like the class clown who frustrates all of his teachers by also maintaining a 4.0 grade average, Green Day can afford to play because their work--brilliantly skewed three-minute pop songs, delivered with such vehemence and vitriol you don't dare doubt them--certainly speaks for itself. But, sooner or later, of course, the band has to speak for itself, too, so what follows is a set of excerpts from that first ratty-digs meeting, as well as a later chat with Billie Joe, sans sidekicks. How did Green Day take over the rock world in less than a year? That's the six-million-copy question, and hopefully we'll provide a few answers. 

* * * 

So punk is back, whether America likes it or not? 

BILLIE JOE: It's always been around, and everyone has their own interpretation of it. It's weird to actually call it "punk" again, when it's been there all the time. 

MIKE DIRNT: It's been springing up in little suburban areas, where people grab it and express themselves. 

TRE COOL: It's people who make a point of setting aside all responsibilities and just playing music. And doing fat joint after fat joint--you have to let go of things like paying rent, going to school, having a job. 

BJ: And, if you can't tell by my house, we don't have a very high standard of living. 

How does today's punk rock differ from its late-'70s cousin?

 BJ: I think it was all about art and fashion back then, really, because everyone who was a punk in England was in art school. I read an early interview with Dee Dee Ramone, where he said he wished the Ramones had more of a glamorous appeal, too, instead of playing in jeans and leather jackets. But it was definitely about fashion, until the Clash really brought out the political side. Our music came from being bored in the 'burbs. You get put in this high school situation, where you're learning someone else's rules in a room with 30 other people that you don't really like. There's nothing interesting about it whatsoever, so you pick up a guitar instead. 

But you all tried college, at least for awhile, right? 

MD: And then we started touring. Constantly. 

TC: So most of our reading now comes from highway signs. 

MD: It's the old grasshopper and the ant story. The thought of actually working is just so... 

TC: Sickening! 

MD: Yeah. So we put everything we had into not working. This is what I do best, and I was always told, "If you're gonna do something, do it the best you can." So why not do the best thing you can, too? 

You guys--at least Mike and Billie Joe--have known each other since you were 10? 

BJ: And the first conversation we ever had was about writing songs. And then we just started playing music. 

A lot of the stuff on your early Lookout! records shows what was on your mind at the time--namely, girls. 

BJ: That was pretty much the viewpoint of a 16-year-old kid. I don't write stuff like that anymore. The new songs are more about coming of age and being apathetic and neurotic.

 Where were your parents when you were touring [at age 16]? 

MD: At work, doing their own thing. 

BJ: My mom's worked a waitress job for like the past 40 years or something, and whatever I was doing was OK with her. 

MD: I moved out when I was 15, and I worked all the way through high school. 

BJ: And me, I've never held a job longer than two weeks. I tried to flip pizzas--it didn't work. I tried cleaning toilets in the Red Onion in El Sobrante. Me and TrŽ, we used to work for the SF Chronicle, selling papers. I sold three the first day, and the next day we just smoked pot, and we smoked pot the next day after that. So we had hella extra papers lying around. Our ultimate goal wasn't to get rich or famous or anything like that. It was to not have a regular job and not be miserable. 

MD: And I've lived in every city around here, except for Albany. Literally. And one thing we want to establish about ourselves is that we're just a bunch of geeks from the suburbs. 

Well, one of the first times I saw you, you guys were closing your set with Survivor's "Eye of the Tiger." That's pretty geeky. 

MD: I grew up on radio--that's all I had. When I was a little kid, I couldn't afford records. I'll tell you, I've been down to a dollar in my pocket a lot of times. I've even lived in my truck. I can remember shooting rats with a BB gun in the flat we used to live in, before they'd make it to our food. 

BJ: I've always been really good about saving. If I got some money, I'd put it away instead of spending it, and I'd buy ramen. 

Why name your disc Dookie? 

TC: Warner's said we could do anything we want, as long as we didn't say "Cop Killer." 

BJ: Somebody told our manager that the ad for it was the most tasteless thing they'd ever seen in Billboard magazine. 

What exactly do you mean on Dookie by "Welcome to Paradise"? 

BJ, MD, TC [in unison]: West Oakland! 

MD: Living in West Oakland, and going out to parties every night. 

So it cost, what, around $100,000 to make Dookie? 

MD: Yeah. We kept the advances low, because you gotta pay all that shit back. Everyone knows you can't become an instant millionaire just by signing, because there are so many people that want a piece of you. 

BJ: We hang out with mostly punks though, and they don't want anything we have. They could care less. And a lot of our friends don't even agree with us being on a major label. 

Is Green Day angry? 

BJ: No, I'm not angry, like, walking around all the time with a frown on my face. But the way my music is interpreted is very angry. 

MD: When you feel really strongly about something, you want to let it out in the most powerful way possible. 

Like the way you baited your old high school principal from the Warfield stage recently? 

MD: I think he was an asshole. He treated me with no respect. And for high school initiation, we got our heads shaved--that's the kind of small-town shit we had to deal with! Sometimes they made you push a penny up the street with your nose. But that's life, and anywhere you go, you're gonna hate a lot of shit in your life. You'll be handed

Dookie? 

MD: Yeah. Yeah, you'll be handed dookie through all parts of your life. And see, what you need to do is just deal with the dookie, build upon what you have, and make something out of the dookie, you know? Like an adobe dookie building! 

* * * 

Several months later, and Dookie is oozing its gooey way into the public consciousness big time. The fading summer heat sticks crackling to the Berkeley sidewalks as punks--many sporting monstrous green or fuchsia mohawks--zing by on skateboards by day, and huddle in Telegraph Avenue doorways by night, conserving feral body heat the whole time. It feels like another world here, a throwback to the Bay Area's DIY/hardcore scene of the early '80s, when squatters reigned supreme and burlesque Broadway--fueled by all-ages shows at the Mabuhay Gardens, On Broadway, and even an occasional GBH or UK Subs booking at the Stone--made weekend conversions to "Punk Playground, USA." It was the best of times; it was the worst of times--despite relentless touring, most of these bands sold bupkus in the way of records, and few, save Metallica, ever held pen in shaky hand over a major-label contract. 

Billie Joe saunters into the Berkeley coffeehouse in rumpled jeans and a grease-spattered flannel shirt; his once-green-and-tufty tresses have grown out into Wally Cleaver waves and been dyed a Rod Stewarty blond. He looks like one of those feisty punks of yore; like he could hold his own through sheer physical endurance in the wildest of thrash pits. There's a new authority about him, the way he strides confidently to the counter, orders a pint-size glass of coffee, then swims through a sea of late-lunching yuppies to grab a table. The singer doesn't seem to notice them at all. Or maybe he's just too tired from nonstop touring to really give a shit. He smiles a goofy grin, revealing a set of generally crooked or chipped choppers, with an entire half of one front tooth missing. But there's such charisma behind it, the same kind of "Who, me?" innocence that little kids use. Billie Joe, you might say, has quickly become the Bart Simpson of the alternative set. 

How else could you explain his uncensored performance at a certain outdoor arena where--in a hyperspeed set lasting only 30 minutes before management threatened to pull the plug--he a) unzipped his fly and paraded his privates around for all to see; b) handed a stunned fan his beat-up, sticker-plastered guitar and urged him to play it; c) destroyed a $600 microphone by smashing it into the stage, then destroyed a second mike he was handed as well; and d) encouraged half the venue to chant, "Rock 'n' roll!" and the other half to respond with, "Shut the fuck up!" He then closed the show with a proposition--"They'll be really angry with us, but what we could do is rip out the seats!" he told the audience, which promptly gave Green Day a standing ovation. Billie Joe not only shrugs off such shenanigans as artistic license, he gets away with them! He's even encouraged to continue by fans who empathize with his uppity "fuck authority" attitude. 

But the facts were all on the table as Billie Joe sipped his house blend that afternoon, and it didn't take a fortune teller to read 'em. Green Day was hitting big time. Fast. And the sheer enormity of the undertaking, the weight of all its accordant responsibility, was just beginning to hit him. He looked older, wiser, and spoke in more grownup tones about his future, which then included a pending marriage to longtime girlfriend Adrienne. You could practically feel this new maturity encircling him like some protective aura. 

* * * 

=Where do all these punks on Telegraph come from? They can't all be local and homeless. 

I think Telegraph has just become this cultural mecca for punk rockers, because most of 'em who are on the Avenue aren't even from here. They're from Arizona, Minneapolis, New York, Florida. They just come out and end up squatting in houses in Berkeley. Why here? It's the climate, and the scene itself--Gilman Street and Maximum Rock 'n' Roll are in this area, and have a link to each other. But at the same time, it's separated, because there are so many different factions of punk now. There are the squatters, the pop-cores, the mods, the crusties. And all these types of people come out just to check it out. Plus, there's the best coffee in Berkeley, and a lot of 'em are real super coffee-drinkers, just pounding cup after cup all the time. It's pretty rare to come across a punk who doesn't drink coffee. I can't drink too much coffee myself--it gives me the shakes at night, so I just have a little bit during the day. Then I can smoke dope and go to bed. 

=What's the attraction in squatting or homelessness for these kids? 

For a lot of 'em, it's the first sense of freedom that they've had. It's like, "You mean I don't have to be home by midnight?" They've pretty much told their families and schools to go fuck themselves, so they go off and do their own thing. When I was 17, I did the same thing. And I had this total sense of freedom, where no one's telling you what to do, you don't have a clock to punch in on, you don't have people breathing down your neck; you don't have any deadlines to meet. You have this endless schedule where you can stay up all night drinking with your friends, or do anything you want. 

=But isn't "Coming Clean" about leaving behind your wilder ways? 

It's also about coming to grips with your sexuality. There's one line, "Skeletons come to life in my closet." And it's like, "Am I homosexual or heterosexual?" You go through this adolescent stage in your life where you don't really know what you are, and one side is taboo because your parents brought you up to think being gay was wrong. And if you come to grips with yourself, that you happen to be gay or bi or whatever, well, that was one thing about punk that was so accepting--all creeds were welcome, all sexualities, everything. 

=Was this something you went through personally? 

Yeah, to a certain extent. But I don't want to go around waving a gay flag or anything. 

=Well, you had a beautiful girl on your arm backstage at the last Green Day show. 

That's Adrienne. She's cool. Actually, we're engaged. That's why it took me so long getting here today--I had to get this! [Rolls sleeve up on tattooed arm, points to a bandaged-on cotton swab] Blood test, dude! We're getting married next week! 

=Has anybody tried to tell you you're too young for such a serious move? 

Of course. There are a lot of people who've said stuff. My parents have been a little more understanding than her parents. I just called my mom yesterday and said, "Mom, I'm gettin' married," and she said, "That's fine, son. Have fun!" I can hardly surprise my mother nowadays. But [this relationship] has been a recurring thing for the past four years, and we just decided to get serious about it. She's coming out here, and we're moving in together, so it's like, "Why not?" I don't really have any wild oats to sow, or anything like that. I'm not into the "Gettin' chicks all the time" thing.

 =I know a lot of girls who'll be really bummed that you're gittin' hitched. They all seem to have developed a crush on you... 

Me?! It must be the teeth [grins again].

 =OK, so maybe you didn't brush often enough when you were young. But you were busy developing a direction... 

I wouldn't necessarily say I had a direction or anything. I just knew I wanted to write songs. It comes from...uh...I don't know. I have no idea. It wasn't any kind of cosmic force or anything like that; it was just a matter of having a guitar around and wanting to play it all the time. I've had the same guitar since I was 11--I bought it off this guy at a guitar store. And I still play it--you know, the blue one with stickers all over it? That's my blue guitar, and, for some reason, things come to life, and everyone calls it "Blue" now--"Where's Blue? Can I pick up Blue and play it?" 

=And you let just anybody touch it? 

Oh yeah! Blue's not prejudiced. 

=It's interesting to note that the general public seems to think Dookie is your debut. 

Yeah, but that's just the general public. There are people who've been with us since the beginning, who know how long we've been around, since our first 7-inch came out back in '89. 

=And now you can afford to trash pricey microphones. 

Actually, Warner Brothers paid for those. It was pretty nice of 'em. They looked really nice--I remember looking at 'em and thinking, "Nice microphones!" They gave me one mike and I took it and threw it down, and they gave me another, and at the end of the set I creamed it pretty hard, I guess. We toured Europe with this band Die Toten Hosen--we played nine dates with 'em--and we got charged for a microphone every night. I dunno, for some reason we just started smashing shit. We'd start throwing equipment around at the end of each set, and these kids would start grabbing Tre's drum set and throwing it, and then they started smashing the microphones too. And the bouncers just couldn't do anything about it. 

=And you actually yanked your dick out onstage too? 

I did. Totally. It was the real thing. I dunno. The bands that we were playing with were just boring. It was more like making a mockery of the whole thing. The big arena rock thing is just so dated now, like Journey or Queen. Which is why I think punk rock started to begin with--it was this reaction to all the dinosaur bands. So for me, that show was, "How can we make a complete mockery of this but at the same time have fun with it?" I like to leave people guessing, "Did he hate that or did he like that?" It's not that I don't care--it's more that I'm careless. I try to be as happy-go-lucky as I can, but you can become apathetic at the same time. 

=Do you feel like Green Day is a part of, or represents, the so-called "slacker generation"? 

There's one side of me that doesn't mind it, because it's a generational thing, and another side of me that says, "Fuck that!" The reason I wrote the songs is, I ended up going back to Rodeo, where I'm from, for a week. And then I said, "Fuck it," and left. But I managed to get several good songs out of it. A lot of my friends had just turned into complete burnouts. And these are kids I've known since kindergarten, because it's a small town and you know everybody. And it was all fixing cars, staying up all night on methamphetamines, smoking dope, and finding out all these rumors about people I haven't heard of in 10 years. Like, "Oh, did you hear about so-and-so, who got married, had three kids, and ended up shooting everybody in his family?" And it happened! It was a true story! You're there for one week, and you get caught up in it. You get so bored, all you wanna do is watch television. And there are no record stores, nothing around, so you end up hanging out with all these delinquents who aren't punkers at all, just cultural idiots. So I was watching all these people rot and rotting with them until I realized, "Shit! I gotta get the fuck outta here!" 

=As they say, you can never go home again. 

Oh yeah, definitely. Unless you get pregnant, like my sister did. Then you have to go. But I quit school my senior year--I just wasn't getting anything out of it. I was taking nine periods a day, plus night classes, which left me no time to smoke dope whatsoever. And my mom even suggested I drop out, because she was a dropout, too. I come from a long line of dropouts. I still have nightmares about being late with my homework assignments. When I finally went in to sign out of high school, the teacher went, "Now, who are you again?" 

=And if that teacher could see you now! 

A lot of people think you get this big connection with a corporate label, and you make millions of dollars, but they don't understand that you just don't make that much money. And when you do, it's easy to piss it away. I mean, every cent that I've made, I've pissed away. I'm not gonna say how I did it, but I don't have it But I don't think you necessarily have to be a punk to decide to say, "Fuck it." You don't even have to have a direction. It's just a matter of getting the fuck out and exploring things for yourself. 

=But didn't you feel abject terror when you first set out on your own? 

Nah, I didn't. Because, for some reason, I knew things were gonna be all right. You can create your own future as long as karma's on your side. And I'm a strong believer in karma. I think things can come back to you if you're just willing to give. 

* * * 

True enough. At least six million times over!

1995 Tom Lanham

[particularemu]

Insanity | A Hwang Hyunjin Series | Part 5

Parts: [Prologue] [Part 1] [Part 2] [Part 3] [Part 4] [Part 5] [Part 6] [Part 7] [Part 8] [Part 9] [Part 10] [Part 11] [Part 12] [Part 13] [Part 14] [Part 15] [Epilogue]

Word Count: 4605

Type: ANGST, FLUFF

Warnings: insanity, self-harm, suicide, drugs, mentions of rape, nightmares, depression, anxiety, panic attacks, physical violence

Tag List: @alightiny​​ @cheonsali​, @jisungsjheekies​, @channiesmixtape​

Author’s Note: Okay, so this chapter was originally 13K words, but it felt ridiculous to post a chapter that long when all the others are around 4-7K. I decided to split that giant ass chapter up into 3 chapters, so you guys are going to get pretty regular updates over the next few days. 

WARNING: I know I have this up in the warnings, but I want to make it VERY CLEAR in case this is triggering for people. This series is very dark and very horror based and since we’re starting to dive deep into the plot, very triggering topics are going to start popping up in the future chapters. 

THIS CHAPTER MENTIONS RAPE. It is very brief, and it passes in conversation, but I feel like this needs to be said in case it’s triggering for some people. 

“I love you!” 

Hyunjin’s heart skipped a beat at your sudden confession. Surely you didn’t love love him right? There was no way…

Hyunjin pursed his lips as his mind swarmed with possibilities. There was a real chance that you didn’t actually love him. 

There’s this thing called The Suspension Bridge Effect — where trauma victims mistake the feeling of trust, security, and admiration for a feeling of love. All of your small confessions — your little phrases, “I trust you,” “I adore you,” and “I care about you,” could be a HUGE sign that you just felt safe with him. Odds are… you’ve fallen into this trap.

But if you really did love him…

God, if you really did love him, Hyunjin would have to admit to himself that he loves you. Then he could finally kiss you, hold you, and love you the way you should be loved but… it would also force the two of you to keep your relationship hidden from the institution — which would be really difficult judging by the nosey people who work in the building. You two would either have to keep your relationship a secret, or he would have to work hard and come up with an escape plan, so the two of you could finally be happy out in the real world. 

But what if this feeling wasn’t love? What if Hyunjin loved you as a friend? The boy never truly experienced love the way many other people do when they’re younger. His family didn’t take care of him — he took care of himself. He didn’t fall in love as a teenager — he studied to become a doctor. 

After thinking a bit longer Hyunjin decided that no — no he didn’t love you in that way. You were his friend — a patient, not a lover. Besides, you were probably just telling him you loved him as a friend. “I love you too sweetheart.” Hyunjin smiled softly. “I’m glad you trust me. I promise I won’t let anything else happen to you.” Hyunjin ran his thumb across your cheek. “You’re the best patient I’ve ever had.” 

Oh…

Did you just get friend-zoned? Well actually, the two of you had a professional relationship, so you technically got patient-zoned. 

You were still just a patient in his eyes. Every fiber of your being was fighting the urge to facepalm and yet… you were completely and utterly embarrassed about blurting out your love for the beautiful man. Hyunjin clearly didn’t understand what you were telling him. That boy was a genius but he’s got to be the world’s most dense guy.

Well, you couldn’t fault him for it. From what Hyunjin has told you, he’s been alone most of his life. He was either taking care of his mother or studying to be a doctor so he could dedicate his life to helping those who suffer from mental illnesses. Hyunjin was such an amazing guy. He was so relatable, yet — so untouchable. You wouldn't be surprised if Hyunjin confessed that he wasn’t interested in romantic relationships. 

You would still love him anyway. 

Sure… you could just confess once more — hold his cheeks in your hands, plant a kiss on his lips, tell the boy that you loved him more than life itself — tell him that he’s the reason you’re alive to see the moon rise and the stars sparkle. You could do all of that but… you wouldn’t dare ruin the soft moment. You enjoyed the feeling of his arms around your body, the feeling of his thumb rubbing soothing circles on your arm, listening to the soft thumping of his heart as you curled up in his chest. You didn’t want to ruin that. Besides, if he didn’t love you back, you just dodged a bullet. 

“Can we just talk?” You mumbled, suddenly feeling awkward at the silence. “Your voice sounds nice.” 

As if you could be more obvious…

“Sure. What do you want to talk about?” Hyunjin smiled and ran his fingers through your hair. The soft strands slipped effortlessly through his fingers, making his heart swell. 

You sighed, searching your brain for any answers. No particular topics came to mind — you really just wanted to hear his soft voice as he talked about everything and anything. “Anything.” You leaned closer in his embrace as you grabbed his other hand, tracing one of the veins with the tip of your finger. 

Hyunjin couldn’t help but smile as you fiddled with his hand. It felt oddly nice, being this close with someone. Throughout his life, Hyunjin never really felt physical affection. His father was out of the picture from a young age, having committed suicide when he was a young boy, and his mother lost her mind soon after. Most of his childhood was spent taking care of his mother, and/or making sure she doesn’t kill herself. When he wasn’t taking care of others, he had his nose in a book. Feeling soft touches, hugs, and small caresses were brand new to him — and he enjoyed it more than he was willing to admit. 

In fact — the boy was practically touch-starved. Every single time you had your arms around him, Hyunjin felt safe, cared for, and loved. When your arms weren’t on him, he felt lost. “I want to hear about you.” Hyunjin smiled softly. “What can you tell me about yourself?”

You paused for a second, fingers stilling on Hyunjin’s hands as you tried to remember something — anything that would give him an idea of who you were. Unfortunately, your mind was blank. There was nothing. You couldn’t remember a single thing about yourself. “I don’t remember much.” You sighed. “I guess there is one thing.”  Your fingers started to move against Hyunjin’s hand once more. Wait... was that weird? You quickly dropped his hand, mumbling a quick, “Sorry.” 

“Hm?” Hyunjin’s brow raised as he looked down at your hands. “No, keep going. It feels nice.” Hyunjin slid his hand back into yours as he asked, “What do you remember?”

You pressed your thumb into Hyunjin’s palm gently as you kept talking. “I keep seeing flashes of something.” You sighed. “I think it’s a kidnapping…” You trailed off, trying to find the right words. “It might be mine.” 

Hyunjin’s breath hitched as the words left your lips. 

So you were kidnapped… 

Of course, there was a chance that this was just a frequent recurring nightmare you were having, but… Hyunjin always had a feeling you didn’t belong in the institution. Someone at the asylum kidnapped you and brought you to the hospital��� Who could that be?

“I always get a really bad headache and I get scared when I think about it.” You paused, taking a deep breath to control your emotions. “Hyunjin… I’m scared to find the truth.” 

You were terrified. What if you found out your entire life was a lie? Your mind was filled with memories of the institution — almost none were from your past. You could remember meeting Minho, Chan, and Changbin. You also remembered the day your eyes met Hyunjin’s — the chocolate orbs driving deep within your soul immediately. 

“That’s understandable sweetheart.” Hyunjin’s arms tightened around your frame. “Do you…” The boy paused, wondering if he should even ask. “Do you remember murdering someone?”

“No.” Your eyes welled up with tears. “No, I don’t.” Your breathing started to speed up as you wiped your eyes, hoping to hide any traces of tears. You were so sick of crying, sick of being afraid, of being alone… You just wanted to get out of Rosewood so you could live a normal life. That wouldn’t be possible if you were a murderer — and if you were a murderer… God, that means you’re a horrible person. “Hyunjin what if I did?” 

Hyunjin rested his chin on your head. “Shh, it’s okay sweetheart. You aren’t a horrible person.” Hyunjin rubbed soothing circles on your back with his thumb, hoping the small gesture would make you feel less afraid. “We don’t know anything right now. There’s no use in worrying about it until we figure out what happened. For all we know, Dr. Douglas could have been lying.” 

“Can we please talk about something else?” You mumbled into his chest. You needed to change the subject before you wound up having another attack. “Tell me something about you.” You paused, wondering what to ask him. “Something deep.” 

Wait… would he even want to talk to you about his life? Sure, you tell Hyunjin everything but, he was your doctor. Maybe it’s weird for a doctor to share their stories with a patient… Fuck, you never should have asked. “Only if you want to though.” 

“No, I don’t mind.” Hyunjin smiled. “It’s only fair. I’m always in your business.” Hyunjin chuckled, the deep laughter sending a wave of calm over your being. 

“Yeah, but you’re my doctor.” You giggled, “I’m just nosey.” 

Hyunjin smiled softly, eyes crinkling as he mentally snapped a picture of your bright smile. Ah, but you were right. He was your DOCTOR. Nothing more, nothing less. Hyunjin needed to start treating you more like a patient. 

But was it that wrong to be close with your patient? You were getting so much better thanks to the way he treated you. But was he treating you like this because he cared about your mental stability? Or was it something deeper? Perhaps it was just pure instinct. Hyunjin couldn’t tell. 

No… Hyunjin knew exactly what this was, he was just in denial about it. He loved you with all his heart. He trusted you with all this information. Something deep inside him WANTED to tell you everything. 

“You’re not nosey.” Hyunjin chuckled. “I guess I’ll tell you about me and my family.” Hyunjin took a deep breath, scanning his brain for memories worth sharing. “When I was young, my mother discovered that I was a bit different from all the other kids.” Hyunjin smiled. “I was reading at a much higher level, I could solve complex math problems in my head, and I knew the entire English dictionary back to front.” Hyunjin’s eyes crinkled as he grinned at you. “That was when we found out that I was classified as a genius.” 

“Wow.” You smiled. “That must have made school pretty easy.” 

You couldn’t remember anything about your school days. Perhaps you were a closet genius? Nah, that wasn’t possible. Judging by how complacent you are in the institution, you were probably one of those kids who went through the motions just so they could get out of school. 

“Yeah…” Hyunjin paused. “It comes with its own set of problems. My father worked in a dead-end job. From what I heard, he was always unhappy.” The boy sighed. “One day he just decided to end it all.” Hyunjin pursed his lips. “I was five-years-old when I found him dead on the bathroom floor surrounded by tons of pills.” Hyunjin’s hand ran across his jaw as if to wipe away any emotion from his face. “He always smiled when he was around me, so it felt like his death was out of the blue.” 

“God, Hyunjin.” You looked up at him, noticing the faraway look in his eyes. “I’m so sorry.” You adjusted your position, straddling his hips so you could hug him. 

“Thank you.” Hyunjin wrapped his arms around your frame. “But don’t worry. This happened such a long time ago. It doesn’t really bother me now. Besides, I don’t really think he was my real father. I didn’t look like him at all.” Hyunjin chuckled darkly. 

“Jinnie, he was still your father.” You pulled away to look him in the eyes. “That shit doesn’t just go away. It always sticks with you.” 

Hyunjin’s cheeks flushed slightly as he pulled you closer. “Thank you. I still had my mother at the time.” 

“Had?” Your face fell. “Is your mother?”

“No.” Hyunjin interrupted you. “My mother is alive.” He smiled. “I miss her very much.” 

“How did she handle your father’s death?” You asked. 

Hyunjin’s eyes shifted away from your gaze. “Not well.” He sighed. “Her anxiety slowly started to eat her away. When I was young, I didn’t really have any friends because I was either studying or taking care of my mom. It was my job to make sure she didn’t kill herself.” 

Oh, God…

That shouldn’t have been Hyunjin’s job. Your heart broke for the boy. He never had a chance to be a kid — to go fall out of a tree and break his arm, to play tag with all the kids on the playground, to enjoy a bunch of toys during Christmas. The poor boy was trying to keep what was left of his family together. 

“Hyunjin, you’re such a good person.” You rested your hands on his cheeks. “Please remember that.” God, you wanted to kiss him right now. “Minho and I couldn’t imagine a life without you.”

Hyunjin froze. Sure, Minho had been a good friend to him so far, until… Until it really mattered. Until he was about to risk it all to break you out of the padded room — then Minho decided to bail. Suddenly his reputation at the institution mattered more than justice. 

Was Minho really trustworthy? At this point, Hyunjin didn’t know. Anxiety was slowly bubbling in his chest. If Minho really wanted to break out of the asylum, he wouldn’t care about his reputation. What if the older boy was planning to rat Hyunjin out?

Part of Hyunjin knew he was being unreasonable. Of course, it would look suspicious if all the doctors started to act out. They need someone on the inside to help them escape that godforsaken place. Still…

What were Minho’s intentions?

For the first time in his life, Hyunjin had a friend — someone he trusted with his life. He’d be devastated if Minho decided to rat them out. At Rosewood, who knew what would happen. With all the trouble Hyunjin has caused, he wouldn’t be surprised if he ended up dead in a ditch. 

“Hey, you okay?” You tilted your head, the cute movement shaking Hyunjin out of his negative thoughts. 

A sad smile took over Hyunjin’s features. “Minho and I just had a little spat.” 

“I’m sure you two will figure it out.” You hugged Hyunjin once more. “Anyone can tell that the two of you care about each other.” 

“I hope you’re right.” Hyunjin couldn’t help but smile as your body grew heavy on top of him. “Did you fall asleep on me?” Hyunjin chuckled when he heard no response. His eyes drifted shut as he held you close, exhaustion making him pass out underneath you. 

---------------------

After having back-to-back shifts, Hyunjin was exhausted. He slowly trudged back to the dorms, ready to plop in bed and sleep for a whole damn day. Thank God Chan agreed to cover him for the night shift so he could get some much-needed sleep. 

Hyunjin opened the door to the dorms and headed down the hallway, eyes widening when he spotted Minho unlocking his door. The older boy looked worn out, stressed, and upset — like he’d break down and cry any minute. If Hyunjin wasn’t so tired, he’d consider hiding behind the corner until Minho disappeared in his room, but frankly… Hyunjin was ready to drop any second. The boy strolled down the hall, heart dropping when Minho’s eyes landed on him. “Hey.” Minho waved, a fake smile taking over his features as he turned towards Hyunjin. “Long day?”

“Long day and night.” Hyunjin chuckled as he entered the code to his room, mentally cursing at himself when his index finger pressed the wrong number. “I stayed for the day shift after breaking her out of solitary confinement.” 

“Wow.” Minho’s brows creased as he fiddled with his thumbs. “Do you mind if I come in for a bit.” Minho paused. “I know you’re tired… I won’t stay long.”  

“Sure.” Hyunjin entered the correct code to his room, sighing as he pushed the heavy door open.

Minho walked in and plopped on the bed, ruffling the neat blankets — something that would have seriously irked Hyunjin if he wasn’t so tired. The boy was known for keeping things nice and neat. Every single morning, he made the bed, put his clothes in the hamper, tidied up, and then every night Minho would pop in and disrupt the clean environment by bouncing on the bed and checking out every picture frame Hyunjin had in the room. Oh, but Hyunjin enjoyed the boy’s company. 

“Yeah, make yourself at home.” Hyunjin chuckled as he neatly hung his jacket in the closet. “I wasn’t planning on sleeping tonight anyways.” 

Minho smiled — a genuine smile that made Hyunjin feel a little bit better. “Don’t be salty.” Minho’s face dropped as his gaze shifted to his hands. “I wanted to make sure we’re good.” 

“What do you mean?” Hyunjin figured it’d be best to play dumb vs. telling the boy how frustrated he was. 

“Don’t be an idiot.” Minho scoffed. “You left the room all pissed off. I didn’t want to upset you but —” 

“I get it.” Hyunjin pulled his uniform shirt off, tossing the garment into the laundry hamper neatly tucked in the corner. 

“No, you —” Minho paused, eyes widening as he scanned Hyunjin’s body. “Hey, are you taking care of yourself?” 

Hyunjin frowned as he looked down at his body. Sure he’s thinned out a bit, but he’s had a lot going on. “Yeah.” 

“No, you’re not.” Minho rolled his eyes and stood up. “I’ll be right back.” Hyunjin sighed as Minho ran out the door, cocking it open with one of Hyunjin’s shoes so the boy wouldn’t have to let him in again. 

Hyunjin quickly pulled on one of his hoodies, yanking the hood off his head before he slipped out of his work trousers. After throwing on some sweats, Hyunjin plopped in bed, fighting to keep his eyes open while he waited for Minho to get back from doing… whatever he was doing. 

Hyunjin was fighting a losing battle. 

“Oi, wake up.” Minho smacked Hyunjin’s shoulder, startling the boy awake. 

“I wasn’t asleep, I was just resting my eyes.” Hyunjin chuckled as he sat up, yawning. 

“Eat this.” Minho handed Hyunjin a bowl of ramen, decorated with various seasonings, hard-boiled eggs, and tons of vegetables and meat. 

“Did you seriously cook this for me?” Hyunjin took a big bite of the noodles, closing his eyes at the delicious taste. “It’s really good, thank you.” 

“Well, I put it together, but don’t give me too much credit. I just fancied up the packaged stuff.” Minho waved off Hyunjin’s compliment. He sat beside Hyunjin as the younger boy devoured the food. “I know you want to take care of her, but you need to make sure you’re eating properly. You’ll drop dead on the ground if you don’t take care of yourself.” 

Hyunjin sighed. “I know. You’re right.” Hyunjin set the empty bowl on his night-table, instantly dropping his head on Minho’s shoulder. “I just feel like something bad will happen if I leave her side — even for one second.” 

“If you need a break, come get me.” Minho leaned his head on top of Hyunjin’s. “I’ll watch her for you. You can trust me.” 

“Can I?” Hyunjin’s heart shattered as he sat up. “Oh my God, I didn’t —” 

“No, I get it.” Minho chuckled at Hyunjin’s pure panic. “I get it. It looks bad.” Minho sighed. “This institution is more fucked up than you know.”

“What do you know?” Hyunjin’s eyes bore into Minho’s. 

“When I first started working there, Jisung was my best friend.” Minho sighed. 

“Wait… Like your new patient Jisung?” Hyunjin’s eyes widened. 

Minho nodded. “Actually, Jisung has been my main patient for years. I took over David’s care as well because his caretaker disappeared.” Minho pursed his lips. “Jisung and I found one of our coworkers, Dr. Greg, arguing with Dr. Henry in the hallway. Dr. Greg was trying to quit and Dr. Henry told him that wasn’t an option.” Minho sighed. “Security came in and took out his knees Hyunjin. They almost beat him to death.” 

“Oh my God.” Hyunjin rested his hand on Minho’s shoulder. “I’m sorry you had to see that.” 

“The next week, Dr. Greg was a patient in a wheelchair.” Minho chuckled darkly. “No one fucking questioned it. Jisung and I decided that the institution was fucked up and we needed to leave.” He sighed. “We knew quitting and walking out wasn’t an option, based off what happened to Dr. Greg, so we came up with a plan to escape and we set a date to leave.” 

“Jisung found another doctor who wanted to get out of there, so he met with us a week before we left and changed up our plan a little bit.” Minho sighed. “I didn’t really trust him, and he changed our plan…” Minho trailed off. “I was afraid that he was sharing our plan with security or something. I couldn’t stop seeing flashbacks of Dr. Greg getting beat near death.” Minho’s hands shook as he grabbed Hyunjin’s forearm. “I decided I wasn’t going to go with them.” 

“You were scared you’d get killed.” Hyunjin held the boy’s hand. “That’s understandable.” 

“Jisung didn’t think so.” Minho scoffed. “He got upset and he said that he’d leave without me. I told him that was fine.” Minho started to tear up a bit. “I tried to look out for him the best I could, but when he tried to climb the gate, the guards found him.” 

“Oh, God…” Hyunjin trailed off. He knew this story wasn’t going to have a happy ending.

“I watched my best friend get beaten and I couldn’t find the courage to go help him.” Tears ran down Minho’s face. 

“No.” Hyunjin grabbed the boy’s shoulders. “Don’t you do that to yourself. If you went down there, you could have gotten killed.” 

“Even that would have been better than me standing there and watching him take all those punches.” Minho wiped the tears off his cheeks. 

“No. Don’t say shit like that.” Hyunjin pulled the boy into his chest, comforting him the best he could. “I would have been murdered the first week if I didn’t have you.” 

Minho couldn’t help but chuckle. “Yeah probably.” 

“So don’t say stuff like that.” Hyunjin rubbed soothing circles on Minho’s back, making the boy’s eyes drift shut. 

“You’re a natural comforter aren’t you?” Minho chuckled, trying to change the subject. “You’re good at this.” 

“I’ve had to be.” Hyunjin smiled sadly. “I used to have to do this for my mother when I was a kid…” Hyunjin trailed off. “If I didn’t, she’d lose her mind.” Hyunjin paused. “She’d get violent and hurt me…” He couldn’t find the right words. “But it wasn’t her fault. She had PTSD from the time she was raped.”

“Oh my God, Hyunjin I’m sorry.” Minho sat up, looking the younger boy in the eyes. Hyunjin looked lost, sad, and afraid. 

Hyunjin’s eyes dropped down to his lap. “I think I’m a rape baby.” 

Minho’s eyes widened. “What? No that can’t be true.” 

“There were so many signs Minho.” Hyunjin pursed his lips. “I don’t look like my father, my dad wanted nothing to do with me, my mother was afraid of me.” He scoffed. “I had to put her in a home because she tried to kill me one day.” Hyunjin leaned back against the headboard. “I must look just like him.” 

“Is that why you took this job?” Minho’s brows creased.  

“Yep,” Hyunjin mumbled. “I could work anywhere, but I couldn’t afford rent since they were all entry-level jobs.” He sighed. “This one gave me room and board and enough money to survive.” 

“Fuck.” Minho sighed. “We’re both fucked up but you take the cake.” 

“What a fucked up competition to win.” Hyunjin chuckled darkly. 

“You know you’re nothing like your father, right?” Minho rested his hand on Hyunjin’s shoulder. “If your theory is true, you’re nothing like him.” 

Hyunjin smiled at Minho. “Thanks.” 

“Seriously. You’re the kindest person I’ve ever met, you care so much about others, you’re the prettiest guy on earth, and you’re super smart.” Minho tried to comfort the boy the best he could. 

“So are we going to kiss now or what?” Hyunjin burst out into a fit of giggles when Minho pushed him off the bed. 

“I try to be nice and you gotta do me dirty.” Minho crossed his arms over his chest. 

“Thank you.” Hyunjin smiled and hopped back on the bed. “Can you stay the night?” He felt awkward asking the boy to stay over, but he really didn’t want to be alone. “I feel…” 

“You don’t need to give me a reason.” Minho chuckled. “Just give me clothes to wear and I’ll stay the night.” 

Hyunjin laughed. “Just go through that dresser over there and pick out whatever you want lazy bones.” 

Minho panned through the dresser before picking a pair of shorts and a hoodie. After changing Minho plopped next to Hyunjin. “I hope you know that you’re a ray of hope in that damn hospital.” 

“Hm?” Hyunjin cocked his brow. “How so? It feels like all I’ve done is fuck everything up.”

“I always figured I’d stay at the institution until I died, but you gave me hope. After you showed up I started to think that maybe, we have a chance. Maybe we can live normal lives outside this place.” Minho sighed. “I miss my family.” 

“I bet.” Hyunjin sighed. “I’m scared too.” 

“Who said I was afraid?” Minho scoffed. 

“Your eyes.” Hyunjin laughed. “Your eyes are the windows to your soul. I can always tell how you’re feeling through your eyes.” 

“Well damn.” Minho chuckled. “That was straight-up poetic.” 

“I try.” Hyunjin shrugged. “But when it comes to Y/N, I fumble like an idiot.” 

“Oh?” Minho leaned forward and wiggled his eyebrows. “Did something happen?”

“Well, she told me she loves me.” Hyunjin grinned, a light blush coating his cheeks. “I don’t think she meant it in that way though. I’m happy she trusts me.” 

Minho physically facepalmed. “You’re kidding me right?” 

“What?” Hyunjin chuckled. 

“You realize she like, love loves you right? Like, she wants to make out with you under the stars and marry your dumb-ass and live the rest of her life with you.” Minho rolled his eyes and leaned back into the headboard. “Oh my God, you seriously don’t know?”

“Don’t know what?” Hyunjin flushed darker. “She doesn’t love me like that.” 

Minho grabbed Hyunjin’s shoulders and shook him. “Yes, she does!” 

“Well, it doesn’t matter.” Hyunjin sighed. “I don’t love her in that way.” 

“Bullshit,” Minho smirked. “You grin like an idiot every time you talk about her. Plus, what you do for her isn’t normal.” 

“I would do those things for any patient.” Hyunjin chuckled. 

“Nope. I doubt you would.” Minho laughed. “Please just admit that you love her so Chan and I can stop trying to get you guys together.” 

“Oh my God, please tell me you haven’t —” Hyunjin groaned. 

“Yep.” Minho chuckled. “I’ve been telling her how awesome you are during my shifts.” He laughed. “I’ve hyped you up, so grow some balls and kiss her or something.” 

“It’s complicated.” Hyunjin giggled. “But thank you.” 

A comfortable silence passed, until Minho asked, “Do you want to meet Jisung?” 

Hyunjin smiled. “Of course. Can she come?”

Minho chuckled. “Yes, the love of your life can come too.” 

“Hey, she’s not the love of my life.” Hyunjin couldn’t stop the stupid grin that took over his face. 

“Mhmm. Keep telling yourself that.” Minho chuckled as he laid down, turning his back to Hyunjin. “Get some sleep so we can function tomorrow.” 

Hyunjin laid beside Minho, the feeling of the older boy’s back against his being oddly comforting. He couldn’t help but wonder if Minho was right. Did he love you? 

Yes — yes he did, but how on earth was he going to tell you? Before Hyunjin could come up with an answer, exhaustion took over, putting the boy to sleep instantly. 

[taralovepoetry]

a short strange story

It’s feels like a century since I began my career here at Penn State Asylum. 10 years since I received that pivotal degree that provided escape from a terribly broken marriage, I was no longer safe. I spend all of my days here, healing broken minds. Better save them with the blessings of health that have been bestowed upon mine.

“Tara, there’s a new intern,” hearing Amelia’s, the only other nurse in this ward’s, voice, I look up from my computer monitor (yes, an old computer because we can’t carry around any technology). “This is Ms. Dein Arzt.” She seems nice and she compliments my bright white lab coat.

Amelia is palpably apprehensive and her eyes are shifty. I would know, as a doctor, these things. We make small talk as Deine prepares  and I mention the shortage of interns recently, how none seem to stay past spring. From the way her arms tense up, maybe it’s a higher level issue, but she’s definitely hiding something. She confesses to me that Deine is actually a patient who believes she is a doctor due to her schizophrenia. Poor thing.

I greet Deine (she seems wary, but I would be too), of course, and give her a tour of the ward as well as an introduction to each patient. I know each one personally, being their only doctor. Patients like Hin, who has lost his short-term and long-term memory and eats exclusively sandwishes shaped like collars. Trinker aus Blut who believes herself to be a vampire. She’s been acting up again. We’ll have to lock her.

I make a call to Amelia to lock her room before we resume. The way Deine takes notes, she could have been an excellent student, the way she picks up on cues. “You must be an excellent doctor, to sleep and live with your patients every single day.” I have almost forgotten about that. I live with my patients to better understand their conditions and I even have my very own room, 1662.

Amelia calls me in to review her case and I dismiss Deine. The details of this girl, unusually young, are heartbreaking. She was abused by her father causing split personality disorder and lost her daughter which solidified her schizophrenia. Hearing her story makes me uncomfortable and, suddenly, the room is too stuffy. I feel claustrophobic. I have to escape. It’s been too long since I’ve been able to breathe anything, but musty air. I tell Amelia, but she insists that I stay, that there’s a terrible storm outside and the roads are much too dangerous and reminds me that I don’t have a ride. How kind of her. It’s strange though because I should have heard that on the news, but I must have been too busy. Besides, with the lack of windows in this place, I can’t remember the last time I saw the light of day.

Reluctantly, I return to room 1662 for bed. I wake up, eat breakfast, and decide to check on Amelia. I see her speaking to Deine in a room. Amelia’s eyes are red, puffy, and kind of... listless? They’re talking about the danger of this girl’s curious case, how previous doctors have been injured at her hands, by her mind. Wait, is that my case file? What is Amelia doing, showing a patient her own case? That sneaky witch must be one of those extremely persuasive patients and smart enough to catch Amelia in her tired state too. I stride in and grab the file from her filthy, undeserving hands. Amelia claims to have only been introducing a new method of care, but she of all people should understand professional boundaries. I dismiss her, but I’ll be keeping a close eye because Deine seems like a risky patient.

I’ve woken up and I don’t think it’s quite morning or else Hin’s screeching would be impossible to miss. Not to mention, he likes starting earlier these days. I creep, because it seems less intrusive, to the main hall and take a nice walk. It’s been a while since I’ve walked alone at night. I think I’ve just spotted Deine and Amelia again. The patients must be giving her nightmares and I think I had nightmares when I first came too. “Don’t worry about this,” comforts Deine, “I’m a professional.” This is it. I have not worked 10 years to have a crazy patient come in and claim what I worked so incredibly hard for. I know I should be professional, but Deine is the last straw. I sprint for her and jump. I am seething, seeing red, and all of a sudden I see blood and scratched skin. Has that stupid bitch hurt me? I call for the guards just as she does, but they aren’t listening to me. They think I’ve injured her! They try to get me, but I slip out of their arms. What is going on? Are they all under her control? Why are they screaming “Patient 134″?

I run and run and run until I see a room and dive in. This is my secret hiding place. I haven’t even told Amelia about it because this is where I talk to Nicole, my friend. We’ve always been friends, but we became especially close within the ward’s grey walls. The building is in code blue now. They say patient 134 has been lost and I realize they’re talking about me. God, they’re all going insane. I’m a doctor here for goodness’ sake. I just noticed the window behind me. It really sucks that I don’t have a window in my rooms, or really any rooms for the matter. Wait, it’s perfectly sunny and cloudless outside. Why did Amelia tell me there was a storm? I’ve just come to the revelation. I���m living a lie. They have all scammed me. I’ve been kidnapped! They must let me go! I hear a scream and realize that it has come from Nicole and the guards have heard. What is she doing? I must silence her, so I turn around to face her and throw a punch, but I hear a crack and shards of glass fall apart. Now my hands are bloody. I feel dizzy and confused- and suddenly a prick.

I have woken. I am trapped in this padded room. The same kind that they keep Trinker aus Blut in. I don’t understand. I must leave, so I scratch and claw, but nothing works. Amelia comes in and tells me that my new room is for me to heal from the injuries that Deine caused and she also gives me pills, the newest type for healing. I swallow them and, as I do, she looks at me half pitiful, half fearful. I don’t really understand, but I am now tired and must rest.

In hindsight, I see it now, how insanity had already molded itself into the little holes of sweet Tara’s mind that were bore out of loneliness from losing her daughter and depression, from the abuse from her father.

- Dr. Amy Smith, Tara’s former doctor

[gravitascivics]

A STEP FROM CALVINISM

This blog will now turn to an effort this writer will revisit in the future.  He fears he might have misled the reader of this blog a bit and this effort is meant to clear any misconceptions.  He has repeatedly claimed that the US had as a dominant view of governance and politics what he calls the parochial/traditional federalism view or construct.  He described that view in more or less positive language although he has pointed out that it encouraged or justified Americans holding racist and other xenophobic beliefs, attitudes, and values.  

He didn’t underestimate those negative qualities, but he did want to make sure the reader appreciates its positive qualities.  The positive qualities have to do with the construct’s set of espoused values of community, partnership, and collaboration.  But at the same time, people who held on to its espoused values made no excuses for the exclusionary policies its adherents proposed and maintained. Those policies included slavery, discriminatory practices, and other exclusionary behaviors Americans commonly put into effect.

Probably the most direct and unambiguous pronouncement of this exclusion can be found in the Supreme Court’s decision in the Dred Scott Case. Chief Justice Taney clearly states that African Americans – be they enslaved or not – were not part of the partnership the Constitution established.   Here is a portion of that decision:

In the opinion of the court, the legislation and histories of the times, and the language used in the declaration of independence, show, that neither the class of persons who had been imported as slaves, nor their descendants, whether they had become free or not, were then acknowledged as a part of the people, nor intended to be included in the general words used in the memorable instrument … [1]

Taney here is not shy of what he interpreted the founding compact to be in terms of African Americans.

And a lot of this exclusion falls in line with certain religious biases generally held but originating with the Puritan settlers of the Massachusetts colony and, in general, in the New England.  It was the Puritans who introduced the covenanted approach to the establishment of governments.  

Puritanism was based on Calvinism that, in turn, believed in strict moral precepts, predestination, and a rebellion against adorned trappings and the hierarchical organization of the Roman Catholic and Anglican Churches.  Through these beliefs, that tradition promoted an equality within its congregations and as interpreted in governance, this sense of partnership was strongly encouraged but as indicated years later by Taney’s opinion, was limited to those considered part of the “tribe.”

Such scholars as Donald Lutz[2] have traced how these precepts, especially those based on congregational ideals, worked their ways into the various founding documents.  These documents were drawn in the localities within the original thirteen colonies.  One can also detect them guiding the development of the states as the nation initially established its governments and expanded westward across North America.

This posting begins this writer’s effort to take a closer look at that historical record.  The postings that will further this effort will not be immediately follow each other (although the next posting, at least, will continue this posting’s message). Instead, this topic will be revisited here and there but with more frequency in the upcoming year or so.  

This first installment looks at the effect of this tradition on the development of the nation’s public schools.  And the first topic has to do with the hiring of teachers.  By the 1820s, school officials were finding it difficult to fill teaching slots in what had been a male dominated “profession.”  The problem was a reluctance to raise either taxes or church contributions to pay men sufficiently.  

The option was to hire women to those positions.  In terms of timing, this coincided with the efforts to establish independent public schools especially in Massachusetts and through the work of Horace Mann.  His story is telling in terms of how parochial/traditional federalism influenced the development of the nation’s initial efforts to provide public education.

And it is with him that this blog begins its look at this development. Relevant to this story, Mann was elected to the lower house of the Massachusetts’ legislature in 1827.  His political leanings encouraged him to join up with the initial political organizing that led to the establishment of Whig Party. This was a movement that brought together socially liberal advocates with northeastern business interests.

They were liberal in that they pushed for the establishment of insane asylums and for public funding of schools for the deaf and blind.  He himself argued for an end to the death penalty and doing away with lotteries as being unchristian.  He attained a level of notoriety when he was assigned to investigate the burning of a Catholic convent in the town of Charleston.  This led to his political advancement that resulted in his election to the state senate.

An ironic aspect of his story was his belief in phrenology – the belief in and analysis of people’s physical attributes as causal factors in their behaviors.  He, unlike others who looked at such characteristics, used the derived analyses as a way to discover potential shortcomings in people that could be addressed by education.  

That is, “[d]uring the nineteenth century, phrenology was considered a progressive ideology.  Its proponents believed that each individual’s deficiencies could be identified, then ameliorated through schooling; … [and therefore] would eradicate poverty and crime in just a few generations.”[3]  Interestingly, he saw the utilization of phrenology as a substitute for the prevailing reliance on religion to guide such judgements.  Further, through that guidance one could lead challenged individuals – even arsonists – to productive lives.

This bent in his public acts did not go unnoticed by local religious personage and elicited a fire-and-brimstone sermon reaction from the local Calvinist preacher.  But the experience led Mann to take up education as an issue that would lead him to establish his place in American history.  School reform became his life’s work.  And in this he bucked the thrust of Whigs who favored laissez faire policies in the economy and other social areas of concern.  

By the late 1830s he was leading Whigs to establish a state board of education to oversee Massachusetts’ local schools and to institute compulsory education.  By that time, as a state senator, he left the legislature to become the first state’s secretary of education.  He took it upon himself to become versed in educational theories and looked to reputable systems particularly Prussian schools.  That European system in the nineteenth century instituted various policies to upgrade the teaching profession including higher pay and prohibition of teachers holding other jobs.

From the Prussian example, Mann instituted the policy for the Massachusetts’ school system that every school have a library and that the state established “normal schools” for the purpose of training teachers.  Again, normal schools were originally only open to women applicants – the reasoning being women could be paid less than men. Later in the twentieth century, these schools were converted into regional state colleges (having lower admission standards than state universities).

Unfortunately, much of Mann’s reasoning for these sexist policies had to do with his sexist beliefs.  While he saw teaching as a woman’s profession, albeit economic reasoning was offered, he also believed women were not appropriate for certain occupations such as politics, military, and journalistic professions – they were not suitable due to their “black and sulfurous” environments.

All these elements of the Mann’s story were instrumental in defining how Calvinist traditions and biases affected the development of American education. The aim is to give the reader some of the detail of how this influence was felt and give a hint, at least, as to why it finally gave way to the natural rights view.  There were various social and political forces that pushed toward the eventuality of that transformation.

[1] “Dred Scott v. Stanford, (19 HOWARD 393 (1857)),” in Major Problems in American Constitutional History, Volume I: The Colonial Era Through Reconstruction, ed. Kermit L. Hall (Lexington, MA:  D. C. Heath and Company, 1992), 463-470, 465.

[2] Donald S. Lutz (ed.), Colonial Origins of the American Constitution:  A Documentary History (Indianapolis, IN:  Liberty Fund,1998).

[3] Dana Goldstein, The Teacher Wars:  A History of America’s Most Embattled Profession (New York, NY: Doubleday, 2014), 23.  The historical information in this posting is drawn from this source.

[ice-cream-nekogirl]

Marcel Herman:

Marcel Herman is a warlock and a former teacher from Hawthorne’s School For Extraordinary Young Men.

Do. Not. Trust. This. Man...

He’s almost worse than Damien, and as slimy as he is. Since after all, Marcel is the one who taught Damien the most at Hawthorne,  he encouraged his prowess and taught him quite a few of his sick values. He told Damien to be better than the witches, to take what he needed and wanted and to not let anyone else take it away from him. But it’s this kind of attitude that got him fired from Hawthorne as John Henry thought that he was a horrible influence on their students, and too ‘fucked up’ for them.

And he’s also a complete asshole to both Amy and Shinsou, and a misogynist as he thinks that the witches are nothing but ‘self-righteous cows’, but something of a racist as he mocks Amy and Shinsou by saying ‘I thought your people were supposed to be smart’.

Marcel is someone I wanted to be a very, VERY bad man, as he embodies some of the worst in humanity. I thought about Aizawa and All-Might and how Horikoshi writes them as good, compassionate teachers because they ARE. And I made Marcel the complete opposite, because sometimes other characters can give you ideas for a similar or opposite character. Marcel is the complete opposite of those two.

He’s a grown-man who knows how children’s minds work for the most part, and knows how they’re much more emotional and less put-together than adults like him are, and uses that to his advantage. He’s extremely toxic, horrible and sick-minded as well, and he’s got no excuse either, he simply feels entitled and insane enough to believe that his ideals are what’s going to make the world ‘better’ even though he literally wants to spread his poison to the world because he believes that his influence is what’s going to make everything ‘right’. Even though his influence involves literally poisoning everyone, to create ‘newer and better beings’ while killing off the originals and allowing him to seize control and power over them.

Story: 

He first appears to Amy and Shinsou during the former’s days in isolation at her mansion, particularly after Shinsou’s time during the Joint Training Arc. Amy and Shinsou were merely spending a day together as Madison, Mallory and Coco were spending a day together in Tokyo to relax. Amy spotted the mysterious warlock outside her gates and she instantly attacks upon seeing him. However, Marcel attempts to appeal to her by saying he means no harm and wishes to speak with the only other young witch in Japan. Naturally, Shinsou is skeptical of him and tells her that he has to be some evil old bastard, although Amy wants to hear him out since she assumed that she, Madison, Mallory and Coco were the only witches in Japan. Marcel requested help with an experiment, but Amy got a bad vibe from him and told him to leave as she only helps if someone is going to die.

Taking her remark literally, he uses his giant squid-like monster to enrapture Shinsou into it’s tentacles much to his shock and horror and remarks to Amy that ‘now someone is going to die’. 

Alarmed and disgusted, Shinsou attempts to break free from the tentacles that wrapped around his torso, until Marcel warns him that it’s a ‘bad idea’, and Amy immediately tries to attack the warlock, but he immediately stops her attack via Concilium. Marcel then gives Amy an ultimatum, as he wanted her to retrieve DNA from a student of 1-A or any powerful individual for him to keep for an experiment, otherwise he’ll wake up his dormant monster to strangle, kill and impregnate Shinsou.

Panicking and not wanting to imagine that horrible fate, Shinsou screams for Amy to get someone’s DNA fast as the tentacles were beginning to wrap themselves tighter around him. Marcel gave Amy no choice, as the witch ran every way, which way to find DNA from a classmate, and eventually but reluctantly settled on retrieving DNA from Todoroki, who offered a few strands of his hair for her to use.

Although Amy didn’t explain herself, she cheerfully took the DNA pieces and gave it to Marcel. But when Amy demands that he free Shinsou, Marcel admits that he lied about letting him live and awoke his monster and had gotten ready to kill and impregnate Shinsou, only for Amy to intervene and pry it away from his body with her telekinesis. Unfortunately, this angered Marcel as he fought with her, using his monster as his back-up as a horrified Shinsou picked himself up to help his friend.

Their efforts were good, but Marcel proved to be a very effective and experienced warlock as he used the ground to trap Shinsou and exerted his powerful Concilium over Amy. Marcel talks about his plans to use UA as his new ‘lab’ since he wanted to use the students and teachers for his sick experiments and offer them up as bait and ‘hosts’ for his squid monster much to Amy’s horror.  

Marcel attempted to appeal to her by the use of emotional manipulation by tricking her into believing she wanted them to suffer, but Amy, who knew she never wanted that, calls him sick as she becomes all the more determined to stop him. Only for a sadistic Marcel to tell her that she will never save her friends as his squid monster approaches her and he told it to kill her. Thankfully, Iida and Yaoyorozu had arrived to visit Amy at her mansion to check up on her, but Marcel seizes the opportunity to attack them as he immediately goes after them. The two teens quickly fight back as soon as Marcel threatens them, but Marcel is much too powerful as he takes Yaoyorozu hostage and his monster traps Iida. 

Fearful for her friend’s lives, this gives her the boost of adrenaline to use her telekinesis to make her dagger stab Marcel in the back, forcing him to let go of Yaoyorozu and using all her might to retract the monster with Sentio Compassios to free Iida. Marcel tried to plead with her to let him go, but an enraged Amy threw him and his monster at an extremely far distance. As Amy frees Shinsou from the ground and rescues Iida and Yaoyorozu, she tearfully hugs her friends who quickly console her.

Personality:

Marcel calls himself ‘man of science’ as he utilizes both magic and science together, believing it to be the only way to ‘change the world’, and views himself as a visionary because he thinks that his fucked up ideas are the only thing that can make the world better. But in actuality he’s a twisted, vile man who has no empathy for anybody or any other humans, including his fellow warlocks and witches as he deemed the other warlocks as ‘idiots’ for not believing in his insane ideals.

His lack of empathy is shown when he not only threatens Shinsou’s life but when he laughs at Amy’s hopelessness and tears when she thought Shinsou was going to be killed. Marcel is not exactly a sociopath as he understands empathy from other people, and uses it against them, but does not seem capable of it himself and is far too self-centered to feel genuine affection for anybody else. Although he is fond of his squid-like creature, calling it his ‘child’.

Despite this disturbing trait, Marcel is somewhat kooky and eccentric as he has a very dry but messed up sense of humor as he cracked very bad jokes about Shinsou’s situation when he had his squid trap him. And is also sarcastic as he can taunt and mock other heroes who approach him.

Marcel is also unbothered by horrifying things that others have done, as he is aware of others who have performed human experimentation such as Overhaul and Dr. Ujiko. He showed little to no shock, and instead noted that they were ‘sloppy’ in the execution of their ideas since they got caught by the heroes, but at the same time thought that they had the right ideas.

Marcel: (To Amy) Surely you know the name of the man Kai Chisaki?

Amy: (clenches her fists, tearing up when she thinks about Magne) Yeah… I do… he killed my friend… one of these days… he’s going to die for that…

Marcel: (not at all sympathetic) That man had quite an idea… I wouldn’t mind reverting the human population back to their natural states. Only us witches and warlocks should have the power after all so I give him those ‘mad props’… And Dr. Ujiko… (Amy looks confused) He’s a doctor too you see? He made those Nomu creatures you and your friends fought off… rather ugly in my opinion. But also…brilliant. It’s just that... how they did it was sloppy, very sloppy... child’s play even, I mean they got caught. What kind of villain gets caught? 

Marcel aimed to make his experiments better, taking new inspiration from the two villains. However, the mad scientist he felt the most inspired by was Dr. Arthur Arden/Hans Gruper, the nazi doctor who worked at the abandoned Briarcliff Manor asylum, but also viewed the serial killer Dr. Oliver Thredson/Bloody Face as an enlightened and fascinating man. These two individuals who were some of the most inhumane and vile human beings Amy had done her research on and despised with every ounce of her being as Dr. Arden was a Nazi, and Bloody Face was a serial killer and rapist.

The warlock wanted to be better than them, and so he did his own human experimentation, starting with a woman he felt an attraction to. He was fascinated by the squid species, particularly cuttlefish and octopuses. Through a series of magic, potions and a dead squid, he would kidnap the woman he felt attracted to and used her for his twisted experiments which is what resulted in the giant squid-like creature that accompanies him, as she ‘gave birth’ to the monster according to him. He fondly calls it ‘their child’ much to Amy’s immense disgust.

He’s extremely cruel by nature and has a sadistic side as he took joy in seeing Amy’s misery and fear over the lives of her friends, and even smiled when his creature almost killed Shinsou. As Marcel had no problem murdering people, including teenagers, and had no problem killing bystanders because he didn’t hesitate to attack and threaten the lives of Iida and Yaoyorozu. At those same times, Marcel also displayed a twisted sense of humor even as he was going to murder him in what would have been his final moments.

Marcel: (To Amy) Well! You succeeded and got me what I needed but because I need him more for my work and all... say good-bye to your friend. (To Shinsou) Just a warning kid it’s going to hurt like hell so... feel free to pray unless... you don’t do that of course not EVERYONE is religious but... either way it won’t help. (chuckles)

Shinsou: (being smothered by the creature as it prepares to impregnate him, his mouth covered by a strong appendage) NOOOOOOOOOO!!

He’s an arrogant man, arrogant enough to believe that his ideals and plans for humanity are going to make everything better. But he was also extremely proud of his skills as a warlock, as he claims that he was able to defeat John Henry Moore and Behold Chablis when they tried to confront him and he would have killed them had Cordelia not stepped in. Marcel’s arrogance is still apparent though, as he laughs off the pro-heroes as a joke when Iida and Yaoyorozu attempted to intimidate him when he caught them. 

However, Marcel is also extremely cowardly at the same time as he let his monster take care of Iida, while he himself held Yaoyorozu, a young girl, hostage. His cowardice shows when he pleaded for Amy to spare him despite what he did to her friends and as a result Amy threw him into the sky. Likewise,  he only came to Amy when other witches such as Madison, Mallory and Coco weren’t around and attacked her when she was alone and vulnerable because he knew that she and Shinsou wouldn’t have been able to take him on alone. A pragmatic move but also a display of cowardice as he also panicked when he thought that Madison or Mallory had returned.

Even though he’s a coward, Marcel is also a very vindictive and petty man, as he plans to get revenge on Amy after what she did to him and for foiling his ideas and is still currently out there. Plotting. As he still has Todoroki's DNA given to him by Amy as well as DNA from Amy herself and Shinsou.

Abilities:

Marcel appears to be a frail man, and is physically weak, but his magic is extremely powerful enough to take on more than 30 warlocks and witches all by himself. As he’s extremely proficient in Telekinesis, Concilium, Teleportation and Spellcraft, as well as Scrying as it’s what he used to find and track down Amy. 

Although he is mad, he was a pretty good scientist who created deadly potion, including one that allowed one to take the appearance of another using their DNA. Which is the potion that he forced Amy to help him make and later told her why he wanted someone else’s DNA. 

Another potion he created is what he claims to be the ‘cure to quirks’, as he felt inspired by Chisaki’s Quirk-Erasing Bullets, but named this potion the ‘Eradication’ potion. He designed it to be better, without relying on the DNA of another human to erase a quirk. As this potion can completely one’s DNA, eliminating their mutations and any semblance of supernatural or magic in them as he used the means of several spells and other antibodies to create it. He states that this potion will actually work on witches and warlocks, unlike the Quirk-Erasing bullets as he hypothesizes that they can’t work on witches or warlocks, since their magic comes from the light and other sources and not just their DNA.

And he also successfully created his squid-creature through horrible means to be both a pet and a killer of his enemies, but also act as a breeding mule to create ‘new beings’ and replicate the ones his squid impregnates.

So there he is... wow... he’s even worse than Damien... I hate him XD He’s stuck on an island but he’s going to come back... and I’m going to make sure he suffers I promise. I’m talking chainsaws.. because at the time Amy just wanted to get rid of him and rescue her friends, next time she sees him... it will NOT be pretty but it will be EPIC. 

[jeanvaljean24601]

The Umbrella Academy’ Season 2 Preview: Where Are the Hargreeves Now?

When “The Umbrella Academy” drops its second season on Netflix on July 31, it won’t find the Hargreeves as a united front fighting to stop the apocalypse — at least not right away. Instead, it’ll find the siblings thrown six decades back in time, separated and, in some cases, building their own lives apart from each other.

At a recent virtual junket, the cast and creator Steve Blackman previewed the second season, which was loosely inspired by the “Dallas” limited series of Gerard Way’s comic book and picks up after Five (Aidan Gallagher) throws the Hargreeves back in time to escape the apocalypse Vanya (Ellen Page) spawned in 2019. However, Five’s attempt to save them does have its hiccups, dropping them separately in Dallas over a three-year period from 1960 to 1963. It also messes with the timeline, causing another impending doomsday and involving complications with the assassination of John F. Kennedy — all things the Hargreeves will have to worry about once they get back together.

Blackman says he wanted to make it a bit “challenging” for everyone to find everyone once again, with some building new lives for themselves in the past, forging relationships with new characters, while others drop into Dallas later.

“Klaus starts a cult, Allison gets married, Luther finds a surrogate father,” he says. “It was really important to develop those stories. They were tricky, because you know, each of those new characters had to sort of still work within our world until the family finds themselves again and sort of regroups, probably even stronger than they did in Season 1.”

Allison (Emmy Raver-Lampman) is among the first to land, falling into Dallas in 1961 at the height of the Civil Rights Movement. In addition to being separated from her daughter and siblings and having lost her voice at the hands of Vanya at the end of Season 1, she also has to deal with “the reality of having a Black woman literally fall into the ’60s in the segregated South.” Allison is, Raver-Lampman explains, initially in shock. android tv box

“She might not know exactly where in the world she is, but I think she knows exactly where she’s not supposed to be because of the color of her skin,” she said. “Coming from the 21st century, I’m sure she has faced, you know, prejudice and microaggressions, and racism on some level. But immediately being threatened because of the color of her skin, I think, and legally not being allowed to be places — it has got to be absolutely terrifying.”

“I think she’s at a low in so many ways,” Raver-Lampson adds.

Luther (Tom Hopper), too, is dealing with “a big shock to his system.” Once something of a leader for the family, Luther’s now the driver for the owner of a burlesque bar, who becomes a father figure to him. While it’s an adjustment, Hopper says it presents an opportunity for Luther “to find his own identity outside of the academy,” and to learn what it’s like to have to work to make a living.

“I think he realizes that he was a bit too power-hungry, I suppose, and a lot of the decisions he made weren’t the best ones,” Hopper says. “It’s a big come down to Earth for Luther, I think, but also it’s something that he needed.”

Vanya, meanwhile, doesn’t even have the opportunity to process her actions at the end of Season 1 — because she’s almost immediately hit by a car and suffers memory loss, which is something of a blessing and a curse. She’s taken in by a family, finds a new love interest and, while she’s confused and lost, Page says it presents the opportunity to see a “very different” Vanya.

“She’s released a lot of emotion and repressed trauma, so we find her in a space that’s much lighter. She’s much more open, able to connect to her emotions,” she says. “I think of course it’s difficult for her because she’s feeling like, does anybody care? Is anybody trying to find me? And feeling lost in that sense. But in so many ways, she’s way less lost than she was in the first season.”

Diego (David Castañeda) drops into Dallas in 1963, and is thrown into an asylum because of his seemingly delusional claims of Kennedy being assassinated. He finds a friend in a new character named Lila, which turns into a Bonnie & Clyde-esque partnership, and also has a purpose to work toward.

“We find him lost, trapped in an insane asylum and obviously with a purpose of trying to maybe change the timeline, having the capability of proving his father wrong and also maybe understanding him a little bit,” Castañeda says. “And then everything just kind of goes bonkers when Five decides to show up again.”

Five is the last to land, and in the meantime, his siblings have done “considerable damage” to the timeline, Gallagher says. He’s left with several fires to put out, trying to stop the end of the world in the ’60s, while also needing to get back to 2019 and prevent the apocalypse there.

“He just gets progressively more and more stressed and as his anxiety builds up, so does the chaos behind his eyes,” he says. “That was very fun as an actor to see that sort of bubble over and really take over Five, and him really succumb to his suppressed insanity.”

The only two Hargreeves who start off together are, for obvious reasons, Klaus (Robert Sheehan) and the late Ben (Justin H. Min). They’re the first to land in the past, giving Klaus time to, well, become a cult leader. Although it might seem like he’s thriving, being an icon has it’s drawbacks, he’s realizing.

“The novelty of being adored and worshiped by all these thousands of people has sort of very, very quickly worn off and he realizes that being number one, if you will, is a real drag,” Sheehan says. “He’s sort of back to escaping again. It’s like sobriety was his cult in the first series, you know, and drugs was his escape, whereas his escape in the second series is just running with his legs.”

And although Ben is inevitably tied to Klaus because of the latter’s ability to communicate with the dead, Min teases that Season 2 will see him come into his own a bit, especially after Klaus and Ben combined their powers at the end of Season 1 to save the day. x96 max plus

“I think through the evolution and progression of Klaus’ powers, Ben gains a lot more agency and independence in the second season and is able to really fight for what he wants,” Min says.

And will audiences finally learn about Ben’s backstory and how he died? Min says “there are some hints” to what happened — but of course, he can’t reveal much.

“If I say anything more, I will be — ” he says, before Sheehan finishes for him, “assassinated. Like John F. Kennedy.”

[chick-with-flicks]

My name is Holly Whiting and this, is Grave Encounters.

Grave Encounters is a found footage horror film made in 2011, which was given a five star rating by The New York Press, they also labelled it “Paranormal Activity on steroids”… which doesn’t do the movie any justice because lets be honest, Paranormal Activity is pretty crap and comparing any film to it is cruel.

 While writing about the character Houston Gray, I noticed that some of the names in the movie weren’t changed from that of the actor and I felt that was a little lazy but overall, it was a good film.

The footage film starts like a regular ghost hunting show you’ll find on the channels that nobody watches, while in parts that the audience are supposed to see, the crew act very serious about the ghost hunting but we soon realise that they don’t actually believe any of it, even paying off the building’s gardener to say that he saw ghosts on the residence. The crew are shown about the building by the building owner and the caretaker before being locked in the building for an 8 hour lock in for recording. Before the time hits 12AM the crew does a sweep of the building for recording footage and nothing happens, the building is so uneventful that later on Lance states that “this place is as haunted as a sock draw”… not the best description I’ve ever heard but it gets the point across. The first paranormal event doesn’t occur until after 2AM where one of the windows opens by itself on the top floor, not that anyone sees it. Slowly things start to happen to the crew, all of them understandably getting freaked out. Eventually after getting too scared, camera man T.C Gibson (Merwin Mondesir) attempts to break the front door down to get out, only to find that the building seems to have completely changed. This moment in the film put me on the edge of my seat, this building was said to be built like a prison and now it’s keeping the crew as its new prisoners. It’s at this point where the crew realise that it should have gotten light outside already… but it hasn’t, the outside world is like a completely disconnected place. Nothing truly worth spoiling happens until our cast has been trapped for around 23 hours when they encounter their first demon, it’s a patient, her face shifts… and its actually pretty terrifying.

It was around this point in the movie where I nearly had a heart attack because I thought I could hear my dad asleep and snoring in his room, but it was still light outside and thought some trippy time stuff had happened, but thankfully it was the trick of my headphones and it was just mum trying to figure out how to use the pressure washer to clean the car.

Now, less of me being dumb and back to the movie. After being scared again, the crew (who have clearly never seen a horror movie before) run into a bathroom where they were told an ex patient killed herself in one of the bathtubs whichhhh is now filled with blood, from which a demon in the bath pulls T.C into it, Sasha and Lance tip the tub over to find both T.C and the demon to be gone without a trace.

Fast forwarding to the end of the movie so I don’t spoil the best parts, Lance, on the floor with his eyes bleeding does his outro to his show (like the dick he is), and the camera cuts. Amazing.

The first Character we meet in this film is Jerry Heartfield (played by Ben Wilkinson), the owner of the production company that the footage that the movie was made with was sent to. His company, according to Jerry, specialises in reality TV and Grave Encounters was supposed to be a ghost hunting show, they already had five episodes, episode six was supposed to be the footage in the film. Jerry is essential to the set up for the film, assuring the audience that this is “not a movie” and explaining how the film was only edited for time purposes. Unfortunately, this is all we see of Jerry but either way he was good for the set up of the movie and that’s all he was really needed for.

Lance Preston (Sean Rogerson) is the main character of the film, he’s the producer of the show and the main presenter of it. Lance is pretty chilled out for the duration of the film and pulls the douchebag move of recording the events of the whole ordeal, even after he’s had demons operate on him and he’s bleeding from the eyes (seriously dude?). His best scene in the movie is at the very end when he has gone insane and smashes a rat with a pole then starts eating it and yelling “fuck you”. Sean Rogerson deserved a medal for that part of the performance.

Our Third character is Sasha Parker (played by Ashleigh Gryzko), an occult specialist and co-presenter to Lance. First time watching this movie I hated her and honestly thought she deserved how she was getting it worse from the demons in comparison to anyone else but watching the movie thoroughly and taking notes for this review I realised she is clearly the only person in this film who has ever watched a horror movie. She mentions that splitting up is a bad idea and yells at lance to stop recording. Honestly, girl got brains. My favourite thing about her character is her dumb pout she does to the camera while Lance is talking. Most of the events in the movie seem to happen to her. The first thing to happen to her is tame, her hair is lifted by a spirit, they run and understandably she panics (though hearing that fast breathing nearly the whole film drives me nuts). Later on, in the film, Sasha wakes up with the word “HELLO” cut into her back (I mean they wanted ghost contact, didn’t they? Why are you complaining). Later on, in the movie she, and the people left with her wake up with hospital bands on and she freaks out, again! Even further on she gets grabbed by a ghost hand through a door. Toward the end of the film she starts coughing up blood which is kind of wasted when it comes to how she dies? She just disappears with some fog and its really anti-climactic considering how much she suffered in the film.

Fourth character in the film is Houston Gray (played by Makenzie Gray), is a ‘psychic’ that Lance invites on the show to try contact the ghosts. I use the term ‘psychic’ loosely because very quickly after he first appears we learn that its just an act, which amusingly through the movie, Lance cant decide when he should keep the act up or not, often telling him to “stay in character” or to knock it off. Clearly reading the room is second on the list of things he can’t do (because the character himself really can’t act). As a character Houston isn’t that important. You could take him out of the movie and not a lot of the atmosphere would change. He’s just kinda there until he gets separated from the group, then gets choked and yeeted down the hall by a ghost and then he’s gone for the rest of the film. I feel cruel saying it, but I was glad when he died because the character’s bad acting and psychic act as a whole really annoyed me.

Now it’s time for my favourite character, Matt White (played by Juan Riedinger, whom I discovered in this movie, is incredibly talented at playing an asylum patient). Matt is the crew’s Equipment Technician (you are the tech guy. You are the motherf**king tech guy) who handles the ghost finding technology such as cameras, voice recorders and Geiger counter. One of the first scenes that focus on Matt is where he’s setting up cameras in the asylum’s ‘hotspots’, his face is right up in the camera, later on after his transition to a patient he does the same thing before jumping down an elevator shaft and dying. Incredible cinematography in my opinion. Matt’s the first person to go missing in the movie but thankfully not the first to die. His character is used to foreshadow the fate of the characters with lines such as “ we can all leave as soon as we’re all better” and “he’ll help you too” (easy there Pennywise, I’m not floating yet!). The movie really feels scarier once the other characters are having to look after him like a helpless child and honestly, I love the character.

Finally, we have Doctor Arthur Friedkin (played by Arthur Corber), one of the doctors at Collinwood Psychiatric Hospital. Doctor Friedkin was infamous for the poor conditions his patients lived in and his experimental surgeries and lobotomies to try to treat his patients. He’s not alive in the film as he was stabbed to death by 6 of his patients that broke out of their rooms. Despite this he is still in the movie at the very end as one of the ghosts (an incredible scene might I add). In this film there are hints that he may be linked to occult or satanic rituals, but I’ve heard that that’s followed on in the second movie which I haven’t actually watched yet.

Overall I’ve got to say, I love this movie, some points are cliche, I’ll admit that but as far as fount footage, psychological horrors go, it’s a really good film and I completely recommend it. It’s not the scariest or most creative movie ever and the pacing at the end is a bit rushed, but I have it on DVD so it must be worth it. I even brought it to a friend’s place to watch with her and her dog and we’re both really excited to see the second film!

See Ya Later! ^-^

[diyunho]

The Joker x Reader - “Freaks” Part 1

Y/N is a metahuman with several peculiarities, but one could say the weirdest is her heart: it is gated by four locks that make it impossible for the woman to fall in love. Also one could say she’s manipulative, cunning and ruthless. Sounds familiar? Maybe that’s why The Joker is the perfect candidate to help her finally get something she always desired: a one of a kind heir.

“Yoooo-hoooooooooo, Mister Jooo-kkkeeerrr!!!!” Bane skips along the poorly lit corridor since it’s almost 11 at night and the Arkham inmates are supposed to be asleep. Yet they’re not: the ruckus woke them all up and now they are standing by the glass walls facing the hallway, wondering what the heck is going on.

The real Bane sighs, completely unappreciative of you borrowing his physical appearance.  

“Hey, cut it out!” he admonishes as Y/N passes by and she decides to stop for a moment.

“Hello there handsome,” you swing your hips while walking towards him and The Riddler snorts, entertained: his cell is right across so it’s not like he can miss the show.

“If you’re going to mimic me, don’t do stuff like that!” Bane hisses through his mask, irritated.

“Apologies honey,” you wink and continue. “Far from me to purposely chop your masculinity to pieces,” but seductively sway on the tip of the heavy boots, taunting more because... who’s going to stop you?

“Seriously?!” Bane growls and you cut him some slack, transforming into The Joker for a few seconds.

“Jeez, don’t get worked up,” you smirk and blow the green hair off your face. “I’m looking for this guy, I know he’s here too.”

“Why are you looking for him?” Killer Croc punches his fists together, hoping he can twist your presence in his favor.

“I need him for breeding purposes,” you serenely admit as The Clown Prince of Crime rolls his eyes three padded rooms up from your present location.

“I told you before I can help with that,” Harvey Dent flips his coin in the air, not understanding why his offer was rejected numerous times.

“Me too!” The Riddler grins. “You should forget about the man that repeatedly refuses your advances and pick one of us,” the mastermind gestures at the cells containing prisoners willing to take on the task.

“I want him,” you revert to your human form, Mr. Freeze gasping with admiration: he’s been a fan for the past two years. “He’s the only male I’m compatible with for procreation on this continent and nobody else will do.”

“How do you know?” Deadshot addresses the burning question.

“I just know, ok?” you pout not wishing to get into details. “That’s why I’m here to bail him out. I helped his men clear the area so we can rescue the father of my future baby.”

“Ugghhhh,” a displeased and very loud protest is heard from The Joker’s cell.

“There you are,” you light up with the happiest smile and abandon the captives held in pretty boxes lined up on the south side of Arkham Asylum.

“Hey Y/N,” Jonathan Crane smacks his lips, “if you get me out of here also I’ll give you two millions.”

“I’ll give you double!” The Penguin shouts and Bane promises:

“I’ll give you three!”

The offers keep on pouring in and the shapeshifter is not a person to say no to easy money.

“Might as well,” you press the yellow buttons outside everyone’s incarceration chambers, leaving the best for last.

“Hiiii Mister Jooooker,” you drag the words and he grumbles, squeezing past you as soon as the glass slides enough for him to emerge from the cell.

“Shut up!” he barks and you couldn’t care less about his crabbiness.

“Your crew is waiting outside,” you giggle and turn into Frost, escorting the grouchy Clown in the direction of the exit you know it’s safe to take.

“Would you look at that?” The Shark teases, not being able to contain his laughter.

“Holy shit!” Panda tries to keep it together yet it’s impossible: the real Frost gives them a dismissing glare, annoyed Y/N is lovingly holding The Joker’s arm as they come down the stairs, definitely engaged in some sort of argument.

“That’s obviously not me!” Jonny mutters and there are more disrespectful remarks from the henchmen patiently waiting for their boss.

“It’s still funny as hell!” Richard underlines and swallows his sentence when Y/N posing as Frost kisses The Joker’s cheek.

“One more sound out of you jerks and I’ll bash your brains in!” Jonny threatens because he’s sick and tired of Y/N playing charades at his expense.

Thankfully you switch to your old self immediately after but the team is glad they’ll have something to tease Frost with in the weeks to come. Although it can be overdone: under the apparent calmness he has quite a wretched temper.

“Delivered as agreed,” you cheerfully announce to his gang and follow J even if he’s not thrilled about it.

“Get lost!” he angrily stomps, pushing you away when you grab his hand again.

“Stop being so rude!” you remodel your body after his and he takes a deep breath, staring back at another fabulous J courtesy of Y/N.

“Stop mimicking me!!!” he sneers and Panda comments in a low tone, convinced he’s far behind to safely say it:

“Two Jokers. God Forbids!”

A couple of goons nearby snicker and the amusement abruptly halts when you raise your voice:

“I heard that!!!”

“Huh?” J inquires.

You just lift your shoulders up, not wanting to distract him from what he has to focus on: making sure he fulfils your demand.

The First Lock  

“You’re still here?!” The King of Gotham comes out of the bathroom, intensely drying his wet hair with a towel. “I thought that by the time I’m out of the shower you’ll be gone.”

You gaze at his naked body, reckoning it’s a nice coincidence to be compatible with such a beautiful specimen. Could be much worse.

“Why don’t you want to help me?” you ask and The Joker is aware what you’re referring to. “I’ve been begging you for a year; I must emphasize I’m losing hope and I will probably have to move to another continent in order to find a new prototype that could give me an heir.”

“Not my problem. Why do you want a kid?” he tosses the towel on the floor and digs around in the closet for a pair of boxers.

“So I won’t be alone,” the disarming reply makes him tilt his head to analyze the stubborn metahuman that pesters him on a regular basis about crap he doesn’t give a damn about. “The storm is coming,” you shift the subject when the lighting strikes the dark skies in the distance at 1:23 in the morning.

J gulps, uneasy: he saw the 6 feet creature for a split second and it certainly startled him.

“Apologies, Mister Joker,” you try to fix the mistake because it’s evident his reaction is below excitement standards. “The fire bolt must have projected my true nature. You only tolerate the pretty side, don’t you?” the sadness in your demeanor confuses J. “They all do…” Y/N whispers to herself. “Is this better?” you transform into Poison Ivy, then Cat Woman, then a random blonde girl with big boobs; by the seventh option The Joker had enough.

“Cut it out!” he finally finds his favorite underwear and you stand by the bed, opting out to be your human self for his sake.

“Can you please help me?” a disappointed woman pleads since he’s getting ready to go to sleep.

“Why would I help you?” The Joker snaps, hoping you’ll disappear from the premises and let him rest at the mansion he found refuge at after breaking out of Arkham.

Your eyes get teary and he never saw you show any type of weakness before; it’s sort of uncomfortable even for him.

“Because us freaks have to stick together.”

“Speak for yourself!” J gets mad at your affirmation and doesn’t know how to react to the tears rolling down your cheeks. “Mmmmm,” he debates, deep in thought: the insane Clown was captive for almost three months and a half and they surely don’t allow any conjugal visits in that shithole. Not that he has anybody in particular that would come to tend to his urges.

“If I help you,” the sudden switch in mood makes you pay attention, “will you quit bothering me?”

“Y-yes, of course! I swear!” you wipe your eyes, full of hope for once. “Since we’re a match it will only take one time! I’ll make it worth your while, I promise.”

You watch J take off his boxers and don’t blink when he yanks you in his arms, afraid he might change his mind: he’s not the most well balanced individual on the planet.

“No kissing,” you dodge his lips. “I only need the technical stuff.”

He gives you a cold stare, fed up with the infernal plague:

“You don’t get to make any other requests!” The Joker pulls you into a passionate kiss that unexpectedly shatters the first lock of your heart.

“Wait, wait…” you part from his soft lips, kind of drunk on the intimacy. “Did you hear that?!”

“Hear what?” he shoves Y/N on the bed and slowly crawls on top of her.

“That deafening noise.”

“Nope,” J purrs while carefully listening anyway. A strong thunder shakes the ground and he grins: “I heard it.”

“Not that, it was something else,” you attempt to explain and he buries his face in your cleavage, protesting the unwanted dialogue: 

“After chewing my ears for months, less yapping would be nice!”

You smile, delighted to have tricked The Joker with your fake tears; you sure counted on him being trapped inside the Asylum without any feminine presence to grace his existence and it payed off in the end. Making yourself available when nobody else is around brought the desired outcome: Y/N always gets what she wants.  

************

The Joker moans in his dream, unhappy with your wiggling.

“What is it?” he cuddles up to your body and it feels soft.

“I’m pregnant,” you yawn and he puffs in disbelief.

“Already?... We had sex a couple of hours ago.”

“U-hum,” you say and let him caress your skin, unaware your true essence peeked from behind the human shell. “It shouldn’t take too long. By morning I will have my heir.”

“That fast?” J opens his eyes since the pillow talk is actually interesting.

“Don’t tell me you didn’t notice I’m different,” you hum with your eyes closed, exhausted from the energy you have to channel into the tiny life growing inside your womb. The soon to be mother is so impatient she won’t skip accelerating the process at the expense of her own vitality.

“No kidding,” The King of Gotham mumbles, smitten with the apparition peacefully dozing off in his arms. The storm outside is wreaking havoc and each time lightning illuminates the blackness J can inspect the delicate feathers covering your body: when he touches you they change colors, red butterflies flying out of the pressed skin. He curiously pokes one and the illusion shatters into glowing dust resembling small fireworks.

The Joker has no clue that he is the first soul to ever see you like this; earlier he didn’t have the opportunity to comprehend what he saw, but he’s sure taking advantage of the situation now to understand what he’s looking at.

“Oh,” he touches your tummy that seems to expand with each passing moment: something is moving and he foolishly smirks without realizing.

Whatever is developing inside Y/N he helped create and strangely enough he can’t wait to see the result.

************

The Second Lock

J drags his feet on the wet grass, watching you admire the sunrise. He woke up and the bed was empty: made him wonder if you vanished without a trace. Yet there you are, waiting for him in the backyard since you figured you owe him this much.

“Mister Joker,” you chuckle, holding something wrapped up in a blanket. “I’m off to my house: thank you for participating in this project,” the indifferent metahuman blurs out: it’s the only speech she prepared. “I requested that everyone owing me money from last night should send it here,” you gesture at the huge duffel bag at your feet. “There’s 35 million dollars in here, all yours as a thank you for helping me.”

“Hm?” he crinkles his nose, insulted at the gift. “Do I look like a prostitute?!”

Why is he getting angry?... That’s a lot of money for a one night stand.

“They get paid for sex, don’t they?” he enlightens the puzzled Y/N. “What’s that?” J nods at the bundle you gently rock.

“My baby.”

“You gave birth?!” he forgets his hurt pride, not believing it’s already done.

“Yes, about 45 minutes ago,” you kiss your daughter’s forehead and her innocence makes your chest tightly constrict before the second lock of your heart is broken to pieces. “Did you hear that?” you interrogate the man you don’t need anymore.

“Hear what?” The Joker rushes to glimpse at the newborn as you step back, discontent he’s trying to take her.

“That horrifying bang! How can you not hear it?!”

“I have no idea what you’re rambling about,” he forcefully snatches the baby from Y/N’s embrace, grunting at her resistance. “Gimme, I wanna check out what I made!”

He parts the blanket aside and…

“Waaaaah,” the mesmerized parent holds his breath:

The sweet angel has wings embedded with neon green feathers, the same shade as J’s crazy hair.

“Are you done?” you attempt to reacquire your treasure and he slaps your arm.

“Little bird…” J runs his fingers along her wings and the mini-metahuman fusses a bit, already establishing a connection with her dad.

That’s exactly what you’re trying to avoid before it’s too late.

“Mister Joker, I have to go, ok??!!” you seek to remove the baby from her father.

“Stop bothering me!” he sucks on his teeth and begins striding towards the mansion while the panicked Y/N runs behind him.

“What are you doing? Give her back!”

“What should we name her?” The Joker ignores your outburst, totally struck with this overwhelming emotion washing over him.

Oh no, she’s already getting under his skin!

“WE?!” you shout, exasperated. “This is MY descendant!”

“You said I participated in the project so she’s half mine!” The Clown implies the obvious.“I think we should name her Emma, I always liked that name,” he adds to Y/N’s dismay. “Pretty bird…” J shuts you down as soon as you open your mouth to protest, stroking his daughter’s feathers.

He’s already addicted and this is a complete disaster!

“I’ll tell my boys to get baby supplies,” he decides without taking into consideration any opinions you might have about his plan.

“Why?!” you cringe at the proposal simply because The Joker is not part of the equation; but your daughter is already bonding with him and that’s something mommy can’t break: she has her own will and set of abilities enabling her to already make choices. You’re not sure why she’s making him believe he could be included into a two party family; there’s no space for a third, otherwise it would be a three party family and that won’t work.

“Don’t you need supplies for her?” he enters the master bedroom where the infant was conceived only hours ago.

You’re still on the patio, fuming at his absurdities.

“No, I have to go home! I’ll take care of it! Listen Mister Joker, I’m not expecting anything from you! ” you underline the truth and his witty response baffles Y/N:

“I was sure expected though to get naked and have sex right after escaping Arkham, huh?!” and The Joker protectively covers his daughter’s ears, his messed up brain figuring out she shouldn’t hear that. “Where’s home anyway, huh?” the tirade continues.

“That’s none of your business!” you shriek and he repositions Emma in his arms, preparing to lecture her mother when he gets distracted by the growth spur.

“Did she just get…bigger??!!!”

“Yes,” you join him in the middle of the room, explaining things you shouldn’t because frankly you should be at your residence by now. “She’s using capabilities inherited from me in order to speed up her evolution and then take a break to recharge around one year old landmark.”

“Fascinating,” J gushes while placing Emma on the couch: the baby is napping, not bothered by the quarrel anymore. “Wait here; I’ll go instruct my men on what we need.”

This is the limit to make you lose your marbles.

“There. Is. No. WE!” you thud on the wood floor and The Joker watches you get taller and taller until you can barely fit under the vaulted ceiling, electing to show him what he’s messing with. The metahuman transforms into the nightmare she really is: dark and sinister, covered in black feathers with sharp, long claws and fangs ready to tear apart the human trespassing a fine line.

That’s not what The Clown saw last night: you keep the beast caged but now IT needs to come out, otherwise he won’t understand the seriousness of his circumstances.

“You are not needed!” your heavy steps make the ground shake. “You are not wanted!” you corner The Joker between the table and the couch Emma is resting on. “Don’t stay in my way or you’ll regret it!!!! I’m taking my daughter and we’ll go: don’t try to stop me or I’ll kill you!!!” and you bend over to snarl in his face, prepared to shred him to pieces.

Eerie silence while J is gathering all his strength to put up with the fucked up events leading to this moment.  

“You two can’t go,” he straightness his back, so stiff one could think he swallowed a broomstick.

“Why not?” you smell his skin, antagonized.

The Joker tries to look as imposing as possible but he’s still half your size; nothing else in his mind besides some words of wisdom he’s about to repeat:

“Because us freaks have to stick together.”

You unravel your tusks, displeased with his strategy:

“Speak for yourself!”

That went down the drain fast, J thinks while the hideous mug a few inches away from his face doesn’t bulge. His eyes wander off to the sofa and he gasps:

“Where’s the baby?!”

A sharp claw points towards the ceiling and he looks up only to notice Emma snuggling in her blanket.

“Oh my God!” his eyes get big. “What is she doing there?!”

“Snoozing!”

“She’s gonna fall!” The Joker circles around you, worried about the angel.

“She’s not going to fall; she’s comfortable,” you huff and reach to caress her.

“Where are the wings?!” J glares at the gigantic mother tending to her peculiar offspring.

How many people have witnessed such bizarre sight? NONE. And yet The Clown is asking questions without a trace of disgust or judgement; only pure curiosity.

“They’ll come and go, she can’t fully control them yet.”

“Can you…can you turn into your usual self?” he suggests. “You’re very ugly like this and it’s spooking me out.”

“Do you know you’re interested in us because she’s making you?” the monster bites without using her fangs. “You’re useless, yet she wants you around.”

“Oh yeah?” The Joker’s attitude escalates despite the sticky context. “You’re useless also since you chased me until I slept with you; she exists thanks to my help! You should be ecstatic!!”

“Money is not enough?!” you gradually switch to the Y/N he’s familiar with even if you’re still mad.

“I have money,” The King of Gotham pretends not to be relieved by the welcomed transmutation.

“Then what do you want?” you attempt to compromise for your daughter’s sake.

“My birds,” he calmly admits.

You debate on his stupid reply: is J deaf and didn’t catch the memo?! He might be because he keeps on telling you he didn’t discern the odd, loud noises you heard twice so far.

You are not aware it would be such a blessing to hear those sounds again: it could mean the unconventional family Emma is trying to keep together might actually work.    

Also read: MASTERLIST

Diyunho(.)tumblr(.)com/post/153664676321/joker-x-reader-masterlist

[thecomicsnexus]

Final Crisis

CRISIS ON INFINITE EARTHS #12 MARCH 1986 BY MARV WOLFMAN, GEORGE PEREZ, JERRY ORDWAY, TOM ZIUKO AND TOM MCCRAW (RE-COLORED VERSION)

SYNOPSIS (FROM DC DATABASE)

In Brainiac's starship, Dolphin, Captain Comet, Rip Hunter, Animal Man, the Atomic Knight, and Adam Strange convince the reviving robot that his memory was tampered with to make him forget the Crisis. Admitting that his power is inadequate to battle the Anti-Monitor, he sets course for the world of a more powerful being. On Earth, the Anti-Monitor's visage is seen in the skies all over the globe. He repeats that the Earth is now in the anti-matter universe. His past victories over positive universes are meaningless, he says, because of the super-heroes' efforts to stop him. When he lists Supergirl and the Flash as casualties, Kid Flash demands to know what has happened.

The Supermen scan the globe and watch the populace panicking. Harbinger appears, and teleports them to a chosen destination, then gathers Dr. Light from Japan, leaving Sunburst to defend the island. When Dr. Light states that she caused Supergirl's death, Harbinger replies that the battle had already killed Supergirl, and that the Anti-Monitor's final attack merely gave her a swift death. In the skies, the darkness splits into a million shadow demons, which begin an all-out attack on humanity, and the super-heroes mass to resist them. The Global Guardians team with other heroes to free their native lands from the threat, but the demons' numbers seem endless. The Phantom Stranger summons Dr. Mist to help revive the Spectre who lies comatose. Below, Harbinger has gathered a large group of heroes, along with Pariah and Alex, to lead a final assault on their nemesis. Alex creates a bridge between universes, and they depart near Apokolips.

Brainiac's ship goes into stationary orbit, and he and his guests teleport to the planet, where Darkseid appears and introduces himself.

Back on Earth, the majority of the heroes are still battling the demons. The Dove is slain by a shadow-being as his brother watches in horror.

In Dr. Fate's Salem tower, the magically powered heroes have gathered to pool their shamanistic might. The Earth-2 Green Lantern and Dr. Occult form the nexus of their energy.

On Qward, in the anti-matter universe, Harbinger and the heroes have arrived in the Anti-Monitor's old headquarters. Kid Flash insists on joining them because of his mentor's demise. Suddenly, an image of the Flash appears to him—the last one Barry cast before his death. Wally follows the afterimage to where an insane Psycho-Pirate clutches at an empty uniform. Kid Flash knocks him out, and realizes that Barry Allen is truly dead when Lady Quark finds his ring. Pariah informs them that a great concentration of evil lies before them. They follow to find a towering Anti-Monitor, ready for the final slaughter.

In Atlantis, Aquaman leads his underwater legions against the shadows. Lori Lemaris saves a trapped Mera with a force beam. A demon closes in on her and kills her. In Chicago, Green Arrow of Earth-2 is killed by a shadow. In Philadelphia, Cyborg, the Son of Vulcan, the Vigilante, and the New Wildcat continue rescue operations.

In New Orleans, Shade the Changing Man witnesses the death of Prince Ra-Man. In Skartaris, Travis Morgan leads his forces against the black menaces. In Gotham City, both Clayface II and the Bug-Eyed Bandit perish at the hands of the demons. In Salem, the tide finally turns. The supernatural crusaders send their combined force in a net of energy to gather the demons from the Earth's surface, and bind them helpless in space. Over the Earth, lives have been lost, including those of Kole, Huntress, and Robin, but other lives have been saved. For a moment, the survivors can take stock.

On Qward, the Supermen of Earth 1 and 2, Captain Atom, Lady Quark, Firehawk, Wonder Woman, and other tarot's strike at the Anti-Monitor, but he ignores their blows, feeding on the energy of a nearby star, As Dr Light absorbs the energy of one of the binary suns they are between, the Anti-Monitor feels his power draining away. Alex begins to drain the anti-matter energy away from their enemy. Negative Woman uses her negative-self to bind the Anti-Monitor and inhibit him: then Harbinger leads all the energy-producing heroes against him, Dr. Light blasts him with the energy of a sun, and he falls into the ruins of his fortress. Alex creates a dimensional hole, large enough to enclose the Earth and return it to its proper universe. The heroes follow. The ball of bound demons hover and then fall on the fallen enemy. Thus, the Anti-Monitor absorbs his slaves energies and rises again, while the heroes start to give battle. Wonder Woman is caught in a withering flash of power, and is borne away to an unknown destination. Superman of Earth-1 and Lady Quark vow deadly revenge, but Kal-L knocks them out, and tells Superboy to take them back. Since he has no world and no wife to return to, the elder Superman has the least to lose. Then he confronts the monstrous Anti-Monitor, and batters him. Superboy sends Superman and Lady Quark back through Alex's shrinking body, and turns to aid him. Superman continues his one-man war against the Anti-Monitor, striking telling blows, while the villain, his power waning, absorbs more energy from the anti-cosmos, and blasts him and Superboy. Darkseid, watching the conflict on a viewscreen, proclaims his planet to be endangered if the Anti-Monitor survives, sends a power burst at him through Alex's eyes. The enemy, devastated, is hurled into the core of one of the binary suns. Superman, Superboy, and Alex are stunned to see the spectre of their enemy rising from the sun. Superman smashes into his foe's fiery body, scattering him: the remains fall back into the sun and the star begins to implode.

They bravely await the end and Superman wishes that Lois could have lived to see their triumph. At that, Alex produces Lois from a void-pocket in his body where she had been sent to wait. She tells her husband that she had been to a tranquil world. Alex cannot return them to Earth but he can take them all to this beautiful world. Superman, Lois, and Superboy opt for that choice. The foursome vanish seconds before the exploding sun would have reached them.

Back on Earth, Lyla is explaining facets of the Crisis to Pariah and Lady Quark. Wonder Woman was returned to the clay which Aphrodite and Athena had given life, then spread across Paradise Island.

Time then continued to reverse itself, as the Amazons were returned to their original homeland before they fled Man's World. Zeus brought the homeless Wonder Woman of Earth-2 and her husband Steve Trevor to Olympus, where they could live peacefully. The bodies of Robin of Earth-2, the Huntress, and Kole were never found. All those who died were mourned. In Keystone City, Jay Garrick determined that Kid Flash's illness was in remission, his body chemistry being changed by a blast from the Anti-Monitor. He could again move at super-speed, though only to a maximum of Mach-1. Wally donned Barry Allen's uniform, and announced, "From this day forth — the Flash lives again!"

The Great Disaster will not exist in the Earth's future, but a lost child will be found in Command D. adopted by General Horatio Tomorrow of the Planeteers, and named Thomas. Jonah Jex will be torn from his era to fight in the future, while the Guardians of the Universe must face the first division in their ranks. Thus, Lyla concludes her tale, and Lady Quark and Pariah ask her to help them explore their new homeworld. They leave with her, honoring the memory of their benefactor, the Monitor. And, in Arkham Asylum, the staff discuss a new patient who seems beyond help, straitjacketed in a rubber-lined room. Roger Hayden, formerly Psycho-Pirate, gibbers about Earths beyond numbers, the Anti-Monitor, and the memories, which only he had been allowed to keep.

NOTORIOUS DEATHS IN THIS ISSUE

Anti-Monitor

Dove

Green Arrow (Earth-2)

Huntress

Kole

Robin (Dick Grayson, Earth-2)

Sunburst

Bug-Eyed Bandit

Clayface II (Matt Hagen)

Lori Lemaris

Ten Eyed Man

REVIEW

The ending of Crisis is the only part of it that remains canon after it (as it happened on new earth). Although many things about it will not remain (no one will remember the multiverse, not even the ones that survived it). Same will apply to deaths like Huntress, who will be completely replaced post-crisis.

So, was it worth it? Absolutely. Wolfman’s idea of rebooting the universe every 10 years would have been a great idea, but sales will not always allow for it (this is the reason DC was never able to do a complete reboot, you don’t fix what isn’t broken, namely Batman, Legion of Super-Heroes and the Green Lantern Corps).

As for its legacy, this event is the father of all events. Cross-overs and team-ups have been plenty, not only at DC, since the Golden Age. And while there have been similar events in 1982 and 1984 over at Marvel, they barely had any impact (Spider-symbiote being the one thing to remember). Crisis was a whole different thing. But sadly, it happened at DC, that means that not all the opportunities will be taken seriously.

Crisis offered the chance of a blank slate, but instead, the relaunch was sloppy and as a result, the universe required a soft reboot less than 10 years later. Crisis tie-ins are a good demonstration of how slow DC was to react to what they were doing. They do not match the chapter of the month.

Another interesting example is Wally West, who was restored in the end, with a slower speed, and became the Flash. However, it would take more than a year for Wally to take on his own book. This coincided with Justice League International and the end of Legends. Wonder Woman suffered the same delay as well. There were no plans to what would happen afterwards, because DC wasn’t fully aware of what they just did. They were too busy closing down titles, and the reaction to restart everything was delayed, sometimes by more than 5 years. Fortunately, the man of steel would end the year with one of his most emblematic runs.

As for the story itself, the science makes little sense, but I am willing to forgive those flaws. The essence of the event was to revisit the DCU history, to streamline everything and to showcase every single character they had. It was supposed to launch in 1983, but it had to wait until the 50th anniversary (while a long research had to be done to figure out the full DCU history). This story accomplishes that. The tie-ins... not so much. But Crisis as a story works very well. Without tie-ins.

There is a lot of love poured into it as well, and you can tell. Those final sequences with Alex Luthor, Kal-L, Lois and Superboy-Prime are beautiful and sad at the same time (again, DC would shoot themselves in the foot by desecrating that ending in 2005, but that’s a story for another time).

You cannot imagine another penciler for this story either. George Perez is the god of team-ups. Since then, he had some replacements, most notoriously, Phil Jimenez, but in 1985, it was pretty much him. And the art is so beautiful, and so meaningful, Crisis on Infinite Earths became on of the greatest achievements in comic-book history.

Jerry Ordway had to step in after Giordano and DeCarlo, for reasons I do not know. He was the perfect choice for this event. His style adds some clarity to Perez style, where Tanghal wouldn’t have dared to modify too much. As a result, you get an interesting hybrid. Ordway’s realistic faces, with Perez crazy layouts and detailed backgrounds.

The art in general is something to admire over and over. That scene where the shadow demons break apart and darkness becomes sky... that’s Michael Bay High Octane shit. You are basically watching a disaster movie.

Some of the deaths in this story mean nothing. Losing Green Arrow from Earth-2 or Helena Wayne will not have an impact. But they can seriously affect some readers.

One thing I didn’t mention before, was that New Genesis was actually part of the Crisis, as Darkseid only cloaked Apokolips, but apart from Crisis #10, I haven’t seen anything happening over there in other books.

Now, which version should you buy? All of them.

I grew up reading the spanish adaptation, which was pretty much the original with translated text. Then I bought 1998′s slipcase, which was already re-colored. I really think this one was the best as the wrap-around cover has the full Alex Ross painting. 2015′s deluxe edition includes the History of the DCU, with a new cover by George Perez. Perhaps this one adds more value. There is also a very expensive edition coming at the end of the year that includes all the tie-ins, but as you may have read, not all tie-ins are good or worthy of reading with this saga.

Then I actually recommend the digital version, as this book is so beautiful, you don’t even want to touch it.

I give this story a score of 10

[bonesandscales]

Hannibal Fic Recs

I’ve seen a couple of those floating around lately so I thought I’d do one too. Here are some of my favourite fics in the fandom.

1. Rediscovered Treasures by Nalyra (@allione). Will finds Hannibal's stash "erotica" from around the world. Hannibal of course claims that it's all "art"--very sophisticated and classy--and Will is just like, "that is a woman fucking a squid ffs”. 

(sending a million kisses to allione because this is the fic that made me start writing for this fandom ❤)

2. Omiai by iesika (@iesika). Will acquires a murderous secret admirer, and learns how much easier the habit of violence can be with an enthusiastically willing target. 

A courtship through blood and… other means of influence.

3. Sounders of Three by inameitlater. "The Chesapeake Ripper kills in sounders of three.

"In which Will continues his journey after the events of "We Killed a Dragon Last Night".

4. Ravenous by rageprufrock. Clarice Starling meets Hannibal Lecter armed with a copy of the Buffalo Bill file. 

5. i feel your thumbs press into my skin again by softhan (@strongwillgraham). Autoimmune encephalitis can be a recurring disease,” Hannibal says, as gently as Will has ever heard him.“Oh, god.” Will brings his hands up and covers his face. He takes a moment to just breathe, letting the thought hit him and settle, mind spiraling in a hundred directions. “What are we going to do about that? I can’t very well just check myself into a hospital and say ‘Hi, I have a history of this rare autoimmune disease that a fugitive who looks exactly like me is known for having’, can I?”

Will has a relapse of his encephalitis, but Hannibal and their dogs take good care of him.

6. The Torment of Tantalus by InfiniteCrisis (@crisisoninfintefandoms). Set in Cuba after the fall. Hannibal isn’t touching Will. Will wants to know why, but is afraid to ask.

Sexual and emotional tension and resolution; a comedy of errors told by the ocean and classical mythology.

"Everyone always spoke of the torment of Tantalus; no one ever stopped to consider what it was like for the tree."

7. The Estate by bokunojinsei (@bokuno-jinsei). "Love involves a peculiar unfathomable combination of understanding and misunderstanding."

-Diane Arbus

Chiyoh had shot Will down in the street, his forgiveness falling with a clatter to the pavement. Hannibal, once intent on his belief that only by consuming Will could he be free of him, decides impulsively to try something a little different than what he had planned.

Or: What if Hannibal hadn't tried to eat Will after he drugged him in Florence? What if he'd decided to run away with him instead?

8. Out Of The Depths by TiggyMalvern (@tiggymalvern). After the fall, Hannibal gets away and Will is left behind to deal with Jack, and the wreckage.

9. Physis by Chifuyu (@staticraining). After everything that has happened in Italy, there is still one last obstacle Will Graham has to overcome before he can try and pick up the broken pieces that once were his life: Being a witness at Hannibal Lecter’s trial.

10. The Sun’s Light Failed by  shiphitsthefan (@shiphitsthefan). “I know what you are," Will tells him. "You’re the Ripper. I see you."

A long pause, and then Hannibal very carefully says, “You shouldn’t speak of such things. I dread the thought of you and calamity meeting under inconspicuous circumstance.”

Will steps forward into Hannibal’s space; he eases down to his knees in front of him, but never breaks eye contact, and it doesn’t hurt to look at Hannibal. It’s like looking into a carnival mirror; they’re the same, but different. “That isn’t a denial."

Hannibal takes a deep breath. He reaches out and brushes his fingers along Will’s cheek. His hand is trembling. “Does the lamb come so freely to the slaughter?

11. “NIGHT OF THE RIPPER” by  EvilAdmin. Life finally seems to be on the upswing for 24-year-old Wolf Trap police officer Will Graham when he receives a letter from the FBI Academy informing him that he's been accepted into their program for the upcoming semester. But fate intervenes with a cruel and ironic twist when Will walks into a house and discovers a murder scene, and he recognizes the M.O. as that of the Chesapeake Ripper, a killer who’s been on the FBI’s ten most wanted list for the past two years. But the shock of finding a Ripper murder scene in Wolf Trap is only the beginning as Will soon realizes that the Ripper is still in the house. And so begins a night of terror for Will as he tries to stay one step ahead of one of the most ruthless and cunning killers in the country, while also trying to prove to himself that he's worthy enough to join the ranks of the F.B.I.

A "Hannibalized" version of the book “Intensity” by Dean Koontz.

12. through a glass by amare. He went to sleep in an asylum; he woke up in a reality not his own. Will's either gone down the rabbit hole of his own unstable mind, or he's ended up someplace else entirely. (The non-opaque summary: Will wakes up in a universe where he and Hannibal are dating.)

13. Variation on Persephone by dornfelder (@uniwolfwerecorn). When they speak of Kore, they never talk about how she had, in truth, been Persephone all along.

14. The Thorn of the Rose by AGlassRoseNeverFades (@aglassroseneverfades). "Beware," it is said, "Beware, beware, do not go into the forest at night." Yet go Will must in order to save his best friend Alana after she goes missing in that gloomy, forbidden wood. He finds her in the dungeons of an abandoned castle at the heart of the forest, imprisoned by a fearsome horned beast. A bargain is struck, one life in exchange for another, and Will learns that all is not as it seems in the ruins of Castle Lecter.

A Hannibal retelling of Beauty and the Beast.

15. To Beg by jonnimir (@ethicsbecomeaesthetics). Hannibal blinked, taken aback by the sudden turn of phrase. Then his upper lip curled. “I beg your pardon?”

Will looked phenomenally unconcerned for someone whose tongue Hannibal was idly contemplating serving as an amuse-bouche. If anything he looked satisfied at throwing Hannibal off-balance, a smile playing around his lips. He straightened his back, raised a brow, and said with relish: “Then beg.”

Hannibal finds himself unexpectedly attracted to Will's dominance. Will stumbles upon his submissive streak by accident, and is quick to seize this opportunity.

16. Blood and Feathers and Antlers by  TheSilverQueen (@thesilverqueenlady). When Will was a young fawn, all he ever wanted was to grow up as proud and strong as his idol, the Prince of the Forest, Jack. And then one day he wandered off the path and into the strangest pool he'd ever seen. It was red as those sharp roses whose thorns Will had learned the hard way not to eat and smelled like the metal that he'd seen two-legs leave behind. It takes a few drinks to realize that it's blood. When he jumps back in shock, he ends up bumping into the biggest stag he's ever seen, bigger than Will's father, bigger than even the great Prince of the Forest, with antlers as tall as Will himself and feathers as black as night.

"Hello, little fawn," says the Ravenstag, "what have we here?"

17. Proximity by victorine (@victorineb). Hannibal’s hand is halfway to stroking down Will’s spine before he catches himself. He is achingly hard and the source of his arousal is inches from him, blissfully unaware. Slowly, he draws his hand back and lets it slide downwards, towards the swell of his erection, letting out a hiss as he grazes against the silk that is barely containing it.

This is… rude. Inexcusably so. Were he entirely in control, Hannibal would surely retreat into his mind palace and wait until he was less affected.

But…

Hannibal cannot touch Will as he aches to. So he touches himself instead.

18. Hannibal: Pushing Us Into Self-Destruction by IBegToDreamAndDiffer  (@ibegto-dreamanddiffer). Clarice Starling needs help with a case, so she pays a visit to Will Graham, who's incarcerated in the Baltimore Sate Hospital with his partner.

19. Pattern Break by ThisBeautifulDrowning. Will knew what had happened. He knew exactly how Abigail's ear had gotten into him, who had shoved it down his throat. He also knew that trying to indicate Hannibal as a killer again was futile. Jack seemed to want to believe him, going by the conversation in the BSHCI's visitor hall, but Jack needed something concrete, evidence. Hannibal had eluded capture for so long, he wasn't going to start leaving fingerprints or hairs at his crime scenes now.No, Will was going to deal with Hannibal Lecter on his own terms. The man deserved to reap what he'd so carefully sowed, didn't he? He deserved to experience what he'd coaxed forth from the bottom of Will's soul, to see the result of his machinations.

After his release from the Baltimore State Hospital for the Criminally Insane, Will doesn't return to work for the FBI.

20. Atavism by RubyBakeneko (@rubybakeneko). Will and Hannibal have prolific amounts of sex, but Will refuses to accept tenderness or affection. When Hannibal objects, Will thinks it’s with the aim of controlling him and fostering further dependency. He roleplays as his former self to try and prove his point, steadfastly ignoring his own underlying feelings and motivations. The results are predictably messy. 

[jahaanofmenaphos]

Art by the awesome @tommieglenn!

Of Gods and Men Summary:

When the gods returned to Gielinor, their minds were only on one thing: the Stone of Jas, a powerful elder artefact in the hands of Sliske, a devious Mahjarrat who stole it for his own ends and entertainment. He claims to want to incite another god wars, but are his ulterior motives more sinister than that? And can the World Guardian, Jahaan, escape from under Sliske’s shadow?

Read the full work here:

ARCHIVE OF OUR OWN

FANFICTION.NET

TUMBLR CHAPTER INDEX

QUEST 07: DISHONOUR AMONG THIEVES

QUEST SUMMARY:

Due to his status as the World Guardian, Jahaan wound up as part of Zamorak’s heist team. Their task? Steal the Stone of Jas from Sliske and return its power to Zamorak. Jahaan gets to learn more about a god propaganda had always skewed, but will he be on board with Zamorak’s plan in the end…

CHAPTER 2: ABSTRACT OF ZAMORAK

“Care for a drink?” Zamorak held out an engraved chalice, the inscription a foreign dialect that was painful to look at. “I don’t know why assholes come into my churches and steal my wine. I’d make a mint if I just straight up sold it. Go legitimate and all.”

So yes, Jahaan did take the meeting. Right on time he used the communication device that whisked him away… somewhere. He was underground, that’s for sure. The claustrophobic feel of gravity assured him of that.

Zamorak had invited him into a chamber of sorts, akin to the dining room of a haunted mansion. The deity really did have a taste for the theatrical, what with the vampyric ornaments and arcane fixtures. Also, crimson. LOTS of crimson.

Zamorak practically blended into the walls.

He sat Jahaan down in a grand armchair of sorts, donned with decorative bones, and it made Jahaan feel like a supervillain.

Sniffing a faint laugh, Jahaan took the chalice and allowed Zamorak to fill it up to the brim with the thick red liquid, dark like blood. That last thought gave Jahaan pause before he put it to his lips, but after a quick sniff and being overwhelmed by the alcoholic, fruity scent, he assured himself it was indeed wine. “Thanks. I didn’t think Mahjarrat could drink, though.”

“We can’t,” Zamorak confirmed, taking a large gulp. “I’ll have to get it out of me later. Doesn’t mean I can’t enjoy some good booze for now though.”

Not wanting to press for anymore details, Jahaan asked, “Where on Gielinor are we? Are… are we still on Gielinor?”

Laughing, Zamorak said, “Of course we’re still on Gielinor. This is temporary base of operations, courtesy of an old friend of mine - Bilrach - who you’ll meet later on. Dug the place himself, crazy bastard. Crazy, loyal, dedicated bastard, that is. You humans would know of it as ‘Daemonheim’.”

Eyes wide, Jahaan audibly gasped. Yes, he had heard of Daemonheim, mainly from stories. A band of Fremennik warriors decided to sail west around the globe, discovering uncharted islands and unclaimed lands as they did so. Daemonheim was their greatest find. Despite being a part of continental Gielinor, no-one had ventured that far in centuries, the unforgiving terrain putting a fatal halt to would-be adventurers. Thanks to the Freminnick, the place was now accessible, though you should pray for those who dare to enter the dungeons beneath the ancient castle atop the snow. Floor upon floor of monsters, puzzles, hazards and traps. No-one had ever made it to the bottom floor; the lucky ones retreated to the surface, the others were not so fortunate. No-one knew who had built such a place, or why. No-one, it seems now, except Jahaan.

Smirking, Zamorak remarked, “I’m glad you’re impressed. Not many have had the honour of stepping on such hallowed ground. It’s a good place to regroup, after the battle with Saradomin didn’t go as well as planned…”

“Yeah, how are the Zamorakians taking the defeat?” Jahaan inquired, taking a sip of the wine, far too bitter for his tastes.

“Better than you’d think. We lost a lot of forces, but I’m still swinging, and so are my Mahjarrat. Now I’m gonna to bypass this ridiculous little contest of Sliske’s and take back the Stone. Let’s see Saradomin stand tall then!”

Zamorak took a sip from his red wine, his eyes thoughtful and calculated, as the silence stretched on. After a while, he finally spoke up, “World Guardian, have you ever been told about Sliske’s plays?”

Jahaan furrowed his brow, stopping mid-sip, suddenly worried. “No…”

Zamorak grinned, the flesh stretching and pulling across bone. “Man, you’re going to love this. Sliske’s always been a twisted bastard, but this put it to whole new heights. See, back in the days of the Zarosian Empire, we Mahjarrat were given pretty high-class roles - our reward for taking out the Menaphites. Half of us got chosen as generals and lieutenants in the army - known as 'Legati' in Infernal - while the other half were churchleaders, or 'Pontifixes'. Sliske, due to his… unusual predilections...  was given the rank of Praefectus Praetorio - the head of Senntisten’s secret police. Investigation, spying, interrogation… you can see how the role was built for him. In his free time, he was always writing. Stories, plays, even pathetic attempts at poetry. His plays were the most fucked up, performed for the top ranks of Senntisten, like urbane demons, bureaucrats… you know, the types of assholes that could afford to watch his nonsense. To make the plays, he rounded up the low caste and homeless, dressed them up in costumes, and placed upon each a crude wooden mask, which he whittled himself. Sliske gave the word, and the masks started doing their thing; they’d speak aloud, control the actor’s movements, making ‘em jerkily act and mime his play like demented puppets. Sometimes the actors actually stabbed each other to death with their weapons at the play's climax. In one show, one of the actors died - probably of some disease - in the middle of the performance, but the mask kept animating his corpse and the show went on. Sick, right? Worst part is, the audience lapped it up! Sliske went on to perform it about a dozen or so more times before growing bored - as he is prone to do - and moving onto something else. No-one dared speak up against him. After all, who wants to be at the centre of a Praetorian investigation?”

Mouth hung open, Jahaan sat there in horror, his mind doing him the courtesy of picturing every grotesque and gruesome detail. He was starting to feel nauseous because of it, and the wine probably wasn’t helping matters. It took him a while before he could collect himself enough to exclaim, “Didn’t… didn’t Wahisietel say something?!”

Zamorak laughed sharply and so suddenly that Jahaan spilt a bit of his wine. “His brother gave up on his ways long before that. Sliske’s always been fucked in the head, even back on Freneskae, playing with corpses with childlike glee. There’s something seriously wrong with him. There was one of our kind, old Nabor - boring as dry brick but he was pretty sharp. He ran the insane asylum in Senntisten, became quite the psychologist while he did. He once remarked to me how he’d love to study Sliske, to really figure out what was up with him. Never dared invite him for a session, though. I used to see him and Wahisietel chatting - they were close. No doubt Sliske came up in their conversations.”

Jahaan made a mental note to confer with Wahisietel when the opportunity arose.

But in all this, one thing became clear to him more than ever before: Sliske knew everything about him, but he knew nothing of Sliske.

Shaking the cobwebs from his mind, Jahaan rounded back to something less… horrifying. “Senntisten doesn’t seem like such a bad place. Your kind were well taken care of, from what you tell me, so why’d you leave Zaros?”

“Depends on who you ask,” Zamorak confessed, his fingers, unblemished and marble-white, scratching absently at his face. “Ask my followers and they’ll all tell you a different story. Some think it was just a political coup, that I wanted to gain power with no endgame, or that I’d had a falling out with the ‘Empty Lord’. Truth is, we needed to break free from Zaros. He wanted to know our every move, our every thought. When we went on missions, Zaros made us take along a man named Perjour, someone he’d cursed to be his bibliographer. Everything thought that man had, every single thing he witnessed, would be transcribed in a little book, which Zaros would sift through, looking for any seeds of betrayal from his followers. It was oppressing.”

“So how did you get around that?” Jahaan inquired, drawn in by the energy Zamorak brought to his tales.

Grinning wickedly, Zamorak boasted, “I stole the book, switched it with a copy. Zaros was none the wiser. And thus, the seeds of rebellion were sewn.”

The last comment was followed by a wink as he swirled around the wine in his class, looking all-too proud of himself. It seemed all Mahjarrat were capable of that unique form of unnerving smugness.

But something still stuck in Jahaan’s craw; he hesitated, and Zamorak picked up on this. “Come on, just come out with it.”

Exhaling deeply, Jahaan begun, “Alright… your chaos theory hasn’t been painted in the best light across Gielinor. Is all of it really propaganda? What about the Culinaromancer? Count Malak? Lord Iban? And don’t get me started on those dark wizards…”

Rolling his eyes, Zamorak’s annoyance looked of one who had dealt with this before. “Okay, yes, we have a few bad eggs. It’s a damn shame cos we started out so promising. Many came to me because they were fleeing or rejecting some aspect of authority within the Empire, and a philosophy that prized individuality over structure, society or government was just what they were after. But over time this developed into a very unhealthy anarchism; some followers ‘misinterpret’ my philosophy, twisting my words and using it as an excuse to steal, torment, attack… wanting to watch the world burn is nothing I’ve ever preached. But Saradominsts take these few radicals and think we’re all like that. They spew out propaganda against us, saying we’re all evil monsters and anarchists. The few have ruined it for the many.”

“I hate that people think I’m evil,” Zamorak continued, gulping down another swig of wine and instantly refilling himself. “Yeah, I’ve done some pretty bad shit in my time, but who hasn’t? War is messy. If you want your hands clean, become a chef. Everything I’ve done, I’ve done for the betterment of my followers, for the Mahjarrat, and for Gielinor. Saradominism is all about ‘join with me and you’ll never have strife again’. We all know that’s just bullshit. Zamorakianism is all about ‘strength through chaos’, about knowing that life can deal you a crappy hand, but it’s that struggle and misery that can shape who you are and make you into a stronger, better person. Take you, World Guardian - I doubt your life has been all roses and daisies, right?”

“You could say that.”

“I AM saying that. But tell me, think back… if all that hadn’t happened to you, would you be where you are now, decked out in fine armour, drinking fine wine, talking to a damn fine god?”

A thin smile spread across Jahaan’s face. He understood.

As Zamorak spoke more about his chaos philosophy, Jahaan was inclined to buy what Zamorak was selling. A lot of his ideologies matched with Jahaan’s own views, and the deity was nothing if not captivating.

It’s just a shame some of his followers are so unbearable, Jahaan internally groaned at the thought of Zemouregal.

But then again, when it came to philosophy, Jahaan’s world view overlapped a lot with that of Zarosianism. Guthixianism, too. After all, once you’re there for the final words of one of the world’s most powerful deities, you form a connection.

Saradominsm did have some decent arguments, Jahaan would admit to himself, but he could never fall on board with the ideology, and definitely not the lifestyle. As for Armadyl, he hadn’t ever really heard much from the winged deity, aside from his triumph over Bandos. It was too early to call a judgement on him yet.

There was always the Menaphite Pantheon, the ‘go-to’ religion for the desert-born.

Gahh… these labels serve more harm than good… Jahaan grumbled to himself, fighting down another gulp of the wine.

While Zamorak tended to some business, the details of which he never specified, Jahaan was offered a teleport to the central chamber of the lair. Feeling it might be considered rude to refuse, and not wanting to accidentally go through the wrong door into one of Daemonheim’s rumoured horror chambers, Jahaan accepted, and with Jahaan’s permission, Zamorak's spell whisked him away.

The centre part of the lair Jahaan was as over the top as it was terrifying. Complete with lava fountains, torches of tall flames and crackling fire, grotesque chiselled statues of beasts and nightmares, and a crimson tiled floor with the Zamorakian symbol crudely embedded into it… this place didn’t exactly scream ‘happy fun time’. In fact, if Zamorak was trying to shake the ‘evil villain’ image the Saradominist propaganda department were creating, this wasn’t helping.

The chamber wasn’t massive in size, but its grandiose excessiveness more than made up for it.

Jahaan manifested in the centre of the room; a throne comprised of black marble and blood red horns strung across it directly faced him, while short hallways to the east and west had imposing doors adorned with skulls at either end.

The heat was also comparable to that of Freneskae.

Immediately, countless sets of eyes leered at him from all around, the present company of gathered Zamorakians all stopping to size up the newest arrival.

Feeling awkward, but not wanting to let it show, Jahaan strode over to one of the large pillars and casually leaned up against it, crossing his arms over his chest with an air of defiance, like it was the most natural thing in the world for him to be here. However, he carefully avoided eye contact with anyone, subtly exploring the room with a low glance.

There were two Mahjarrat that Jahaan didn’t recognise from the Ritual of Rejuvenation. One, a bulky looking fellow draped in thick, tattered cloaks. There was a presence about him, a power that rattled through his very being. He looked solid; while all Mahjarrat are technically immortal, this one actually felt it. It was almost unnerving. Yet, undermining that were his eyes - they looked haunted, flicking between the ceiling, the walls, the floor, like he was hearing sounds from all directions and trying to gravitate towards the strongest voice.

But if he missed the Ritual, why doesn’t he look all... half-dead? Jahaan pondered to himself, hoping he didn’t look like he was staring.

The other Mahjarrat, on the other hand, did look worse for wear. Hazeel, he was known as. Jahaan had heard stories about his cult of followers in Ardougne, and how he’d ruled over the lands way back in the Fourth Age with brutality and fear. It was the Carnillean Family that became his end, alongside Saradominist peasants who, upon learning magic and runecrafting, wished to liberate their lands from the Zamorakian tyranny. They didn’t manage to kill Hazeel, but they trapped him in a state of torpor, neither living nor dead. His skeletal appearance did have a rather blood-curdling quality about it. Unlike the other Mahjarrat, he had very large horns protruding from his forehead, looking quite similar to the headpiece Azzanadra wore. These, however, were sharpened into deadly points.

Jahaan wasn’t quite sure how the two Mahjarrat could look so different - one full of life and vigor, the other frail and weak.

If I tread carefully, perhaps I could find out? Jahaan thought to himself, not quite looking forward to conversing with even more Zamorakian Mahjarrat than he had to, but his curiosity drove him onwards.

Before he could talk himself out of it, he strolled over to the rejuvenated looking one, greeting him with a respectful nod of his head. “I’m Jahaan. Zamorak sent for me. I don’t think we’ve met before...”

The trailed-off sentence was an indication to fill in the blanks, but the Mahjarrat seemed rather perturbed at Jahaan’s presence. Jahaan didn’t think he was going to get a response and planned on awkwardly shuffling away, pretending that never happened as he did so, but the Mahjarrat’s sudden response startled him into staying. “Bilrach. I am Bilrach. Forgive me, human contact is taking some getting used to.”

Seems nice enough, Jahaan decided with relief. Not wanting to let the conversation go dry for too long, he continued, “Pleased to meet you, Bilrach. I was at the last Ritual of Rejuvenation, but I don’t remember seeing you there. You… you look well, though. Lots of… skin.”

“I was digging,” Bilrach bluntly replied. “Always digging, digging, digging… they thought this to be my tomb, but it was my salvation. The rift did not provide answers alone, though.”

Quickly, Jahaan deduced Bilrach was not shuffling with a full deck. "Ah yes, Zamorak mentioned that you dug this place yourself."

Bilrach nodded. “Centuries I dug, trying to find the rift between realities, the place where the bond between worlds is at its weakest. Here, I was going to find Zamorak and pull him back to Gielinor. I did not succeed, but this chamber is the product of my labour.”

“But if you missed the Ritual, how come you look so powerful?” Jahaan inquired, hoping the subtle compliment would work in his favour.

From the shift in Bilrach's demeanor, it seemed to work. “Ah, yes! Instead, after tumbling through the dimensions, I arrived on my home planet of Freneskae. There are no longer any of my kind there, but other tribes once existed. The Chelon-Mah and Mahserrat, born from the same energy as we Mahjarrat. It was then that I had an epiphany. Hmm.”

Silence. After it was clear Bilrach was indeed lost inside his own head, Jahaan gently prodded, “And what was that?”

“Ah, yes. The other tribes were also bound to rituals, needing the life force of those that perish to sustain themselves. The Mahserrat decided to forgo this process, resigning themselves to a fate without rejuvenation. But the Chelon-Mah… hmm. The Chelon-Mah did the opposite. They concluded that only the strongest should live, yes. One almighty being, commanding the power of the entire tribe. I remember it. The battle blazed across the horizon – a glorious sight to behold, indeed. For weeks they fought tirelessly, until only one remained with all their power. A brutal incarnation of the Chelon-Mah tribe; the physical embodiment of war. Yes, his might on the battlefield was unparalleled.”

“What does this have to do with your epiphany?”

“Epiphany?” Bilrach blinked. “Oh, yes. I knew that after thousands of years whilst the Mahjarrat have grown stronger, the Chelon-Mah would have diminished. With the Mahserrat all likely to have perished and no kin to sacrifice, he would never have been able to rejuvenate. I returned to Gielinor with the once-great Chelon-Mah captive. I slew him upon my very own Ritual Marker.”

Jahaan gasped. “That worked?!”

“Apparently so. The rejuvenation was an unintended effect of his death. A strange power spread throughout the surface - you may have even felt it yourself. My kin would have believed me perished. But I live.”

“But if you didn’t know you’d be rejuvenated, why did you kill him?”

“On Freneskae we were at war with the Chelon-Mah; with no kin left to test his strength he turned to the Mahjarrat,” Bilrach gravely explained, his eyes flitting over to the two doorways parallel to him. “He killed many of my brethren. Taking his life was a justice long overdue. As the only Mahjarrat at the Ritual Marker when I slew him, I was able to absorb all his power, hmm. I thought I could use this new power to bring back Zamorak. Alas, I still did not find the answers I sought. It would seem it is exceptionally difficult for anyone but a god to open a portal between worlds.”

Remembering Zamorak’s words from before, Jahaan thought to inquire into why Bilrach defected from Zaros to Zamorak, but by the change in tone and demeanour he received from Bilrach, he wished he’d never rocked the boat.

“You know nothing of the Mahjarrat, impling, and neither did Zaros,” Bilrach’s gravelly voice sounded like he’d inhaled too much Daemonheim dust. Though his voice was monotonous and grounded, his eyes seemed to dart and flicker. “We were warriors, brave survivors. In the Empire we grew soft. Zaros took our culture from us, tried to tame our nature, making us priests and bureaucrats - such positions are a disgrace to the Mahjarrat name! Zamorak reminded us of our birthright.”

“Ah, I see you’re getting yourself acquainted,” a feminine voice faded in beside the pair, relieving the tension Jahaan had created. Moia walked up to stand beside Bilrach with the friendliest smile her contorted face could manage. “Jahaan, why don’t I introduce you to everyone else while we await my master’s presence?”

“Sure,” Jahaan agreed, following Moia’s lead with a quick look over his shoulder at Bilrach, who seemed to be muttering something under his breath. To Moia, he asked, “Do you know Bilrach well?”

“I do,” Moia replied, solemnly. “He and I held hands as we walked into the rift together. But we were torn apart. I thought him lost. I found Zamorak, and he arrived on Freneskae.”

Stopping their walk across the chamber, Moia leaned down towards Jahaan to speak lowly, “Bilrach has sacrificed a lot in order to provide my master sanctuary. When I first found him, he was… unrecognisable. Now, he tells me the voices have subsided at the very least. I… I still fear for him.”

Not exactly sure what he was expected to say, Jahaan went with, “I’ll look out for him.”

This was the wrong answer; Moia shot him a glare that could melt mithril. “He doesn’t need you looking out for him.”

She stormed off across the chamber, sharply motioning for Jahaan to follow with a reluctant grunt of, “Come on.”

DISCLAIMER:

As Of Gods and Men is a reimagining, retelling and reworking of the Sixth Age, a LOT of dialogue/characters/plotlines/etc. are pulled right from the game itself, and this belongs to Jagex.

Previous chapter / Next chapter

[kopfkinoes]

Poldark is seriously such a great series. With every new season, every new episode it seemed to me to only be getting better and better. I really hope they give fans an actual finale and don’t call it off at 6 episodes, now, in the last season. There’s another series that ended with a 6 episode season and we all know how that went down. 

That being said, I do have one complaint so far about the 5th season, which I find otherwise flawless. What the fuck was up with Demelza being ok with that nutjob Tess, whom Demelza employed after Tess set her house on fire, no less, telling her “Not all of us are fortunate enough to sell our bodies to our master in exchange for a wedding ring?”. Demelza smiling at that and going “She’s right. I knew what I was doing when I went into Ross’ room that night. He’s an honourable man and I took advantage of that.”....that shit was whack. Like, why suddenly this “Demelza trapped Ross into a marriage” plot (which, when Demelza herself says it, in front of her friends, no less, becomes 100% factual) when so far we’ve been told, by Demelza herself that she’s loved Ross since the beginning and that’s why she slept with him? Like, she told Verity that in season 1, right after they were married. She told Drake about that in season 4 (I think) when he was supposed to marry Rosina. Why suddenly this “Demelza plotted this” bullshit that really makes Demelza look like an opportunist who was only after becoming a lady? 

I am honestly quite surprised to see people pity George. Maybe it’s because I’ve binge watched the series in 2 months or so and I haven’t experienced the breaks between seasons that people who have been watching since 2015 have (which allow them to forget things a bit, maybe) but I felt no pity whatsoever. It is unfortunate that his wife died and I really liked Elizabeth. But how much suffering did George cause and he didn’t cause it unwillingly. He had no remorse about anything. His love for Elizabeth was his only redeemable quality and even that doesn’t account for much because it is due to him that Elizabeth died. I know people seem to blame Ross for it and I understand his sleeping with Elizabeth definitely played a part but, if you want to split hairs, then Geoffrey Charles is equally guilty because of his “Valentine is the spitting image of uncle Ross.” because George had let it go before that.

I don’t know whether Geoffrey Charles does it do spite George or simply because he’s unaware, but it is that which triggers the reminder of Aunt Agatha’s remark and spurns George back on track. Frankly, it is his hate boner for Ross because although he is right in assuming Valentine isn’t his biological son, he wouldn’t have noticed it unless Agatha and Geoffrey Charles, two people whom he knows despise him, hadn’t brought his resemblance to Ross to attention. He has no proof other than the word of those two who are founding members of the Anti-George Committee but his belief that Ross is always out to play him for a fool (because he put toads in his pants when they were kids lmao woe is you, George; and because he believed Ross and Francis hated him because his grandfather was a blacksmith which we know is bullshit because Champion of the People Ross Poldark wouldn’t fucking do that) he believes it 100%. 

It is frankly Valentine I felt most sorry for. His baby sister had her nurse but Valentine was so lonely and that’s really sad for a child. I do wish Ross could take him in although I don’t think Demelza would like that. But I felt no compassion for George. How many people starved and died because of George? How many died of pneumonia or other diseases in his mines? He sent rape victims to prison and rewarded the rapists as magistrate. He sentenced people to 20 lashes for stealing one pheasant. He had Ross arrested and nearly killed for taking his people to grab provisions off his sinking ship, although none of the crew were killed. He wanted to get Sam and Drake Carne hanged although he knew they were innocent. As MP he was viciously against the poor. He bought a whole borough and threatened and bribed one of its elected members to give up his post in the Parliment for him when he realized he won’t be re-elected, while the other man he just bribed to vote as he wished. He bought voters for the re-election via Elizabeth’s Chynoweth family ties and by threatening to ruin them financially if they did otherwise. He destroyed Pascoe’s Bank. He forced Morwenna (admittedly, Elizabeth played a part in this too) into a marriage with a man who raped her multiple times, cheated on her with her own sister as well as prostitutes, nearly had her committed to a mental asylum to get rid of her and upon whose death his wretched mother made it impossible for Morwenna to ever see her son again. He made a bet with Monk Adderley that Adderley will sleep with Demelza which almost ended in her being raped. He basically caused Aunt Agatha’s death (keeping her in the cold, refusing to let her eat, gave her a heart attack during their last conversation). He seems to be supportive of slavery, wants to add his name to business driven by slave labour with no problems. Believed the Irish had to suffer some more, that they deserved a “strong hand” or something like that. Didn’t give a shit that people, many of them children, were caught in an explosion in his mine. Ross freaking saved him from an angry mob (twice) and he had to be a little bitch nevertheless. He says his intended new bride “will have to make the best of it”. He took Wheal Grambler and Wheal Leisure and Trenwith just because he has a hate boner for the Poldarks, just to hurt them not because he needed them. And he seems to be just as despicable from now on. Jack Farthing is a great, absolutely brilliant actor. George’s grief and insanity are very believable and the methods via which he is treated (before Dwight) are shit. But the man has done way too many evil things for me to have compassion for him from just that.

[mysteriousgoldentriangle]

Halloween vibe stories

Stories that have the seasonal feeling. These are just some I could think of on top of my head. If I am missing one message me so I can add on to the list. Happy reading! stay safe :)  

Trick or Sweet Mabel sets Bill and Dipper up on a trick-or-treating date that they don't even realize is a date.

A Triangle in the Woods Deep in the forests of the mountain lies a haunted plot of land. A cabin that's theorized to be ruled by the most ruthless, terrifying demon that's ever existed on our plane of existence. Only the bravest and stupidest souls ever dare to tread there, and those who already have refused to even speak of it led alone go back. There's never been a single soul that's made it back fully sane… And Bill intends to keep it that way, damn it. No matter how DIFFICULT this stupid group of brats may be, they WILL leave that cabin running and screaming for their lives! Even if Bill has to destroy himself in the process!

The Bill Haunting When Dipper gets kidnapped by teenage boys in a cult, an evil spirit named Bill Cipher surprisingly saves him. Dipper slowly gets to know Bill and realizes the ghost is more human than he thought.

The Blindeye Murderer In the shadows of New York City there lurks a murderer that has never been caught before. He kills all his victims the same way, by cutting open the chest and ripping out the heart. He doesn't stop there. This murderer always, always, takes the eyes of his victims. Dipper Pines wants to be the first one to catch him and put an end to all the killings. However, what happens when he finds out the killer is the very same man he falls deeply in love with, Bill Cipher?

Golden Hills When Dipper falls for a mysterious stranger, his humdrum life takes an unexpected and dangerous turn. Trapped in a house of ghosts, nightmares, blood, and gold, Dipper can't decide between his own sanity or his new life with a man who may have more than just a skeleton in his closet. Based on the movie Crimson Peak.

Prey Dipper Pines works a summer job volunteering at the Gravity Falls, Oregon State Asylum in 1964. He thought he's seen everything until a new patient arrives a week before his 16th birthday. (depictions of rape, smut, and super jealous/protective Bill moments are contained in this book. Proceed with caution)

Everything you say is like music to my ears Bill~ Bill Loves Dipper very much, but in an extremely wrong twisted kind of way, Dipper wants nothing to with it, but he wasn`t given a choice in the first place.

Gone He whispers more praises. They curl in Dipper’s mind, sick seeds of something that resembles love. Perhaps obsession. It sits in his stomach like cyanide and poisons his blood.

Surrender to me Pinetree Bill Cipher loved his little Pinetree, But the boy didn`t love him back, He said he wanted proof well proof is what the boy wants then proof it is what he`s gonna get.

Don`t scream anymore my Pinetree~  Dipper Pines is a famous singer, His life could be called perfect, well that is until he starts receiving horrifying letters from someone who claims to be his biggest fan, His fear is getting bigger and bigger with every day, He hopes that everything turns out alright, but the newest letter tells him that it will not be like that.

Haunted Dipper knows that Bill is watching him and he also knows that he will never ever get away from him, He finally understands that now.

damnatis daemonium Historical!AU: 19-year-old Dipper volunteers himself as an offering to a demon so that he can finally join the famed Brotherhood. Of course, nothing goes to plan, and they summon the wrong demon.

Raised Spirits Dipper's always been into the supernatural. Especially ghosts, and hauntings. And everyone says the Cipher place is haunted. Dipper's not so sure about that... but it's worth checking out.

Wonderland Dipper was lonely sometimes. Mabel had her friends, Wendy and Soos had their own lives, Grunkle Stan teased him and never believed him about anything supernatural. Dipper wished that there was someone he could talk to about his adventures or just have a friend in general. Then he meets a man named Bill who believes him and everything about him is wonderful and very quickly Dipper finds himself falling down into a dark wonderland. THIS IS AU-ISH: This story takes place a bit before Boss Mabel, and then goes a bit AU from after that until it will completely diverge from the canon plot line.

The World That Faded Away / The Boy That Time Forgot When life hit Dipper Pines it hit Dipper Pines hard. Trainwreck hard. This was a statement that all who knew the boy could agree on. Life had taken a liking to the boy in the same way a feline had taken a liking to a particularly delicious mouse; it had trapped him, toyed with him, before swallowing him whole. As a result, the eighteen-year-old had horrific luck and a habit of getting himself and others into extremely bad situations. Like selling his soul to Bill CipherWho is only too happy to take what is, and has always been, his.

Defying Destiny Bill Cipher always dreamed of finding his other half. In his world, finding ‘the one’ meant so much. You were destined to be together, time and death would literally have no effect on your body until they day you unite. The most romantic stories have been passed down by people accidentally meeting the one and not knowing until they realize one day that ‘hey, when did my heart start beating again?’ It fills you up and makes you whole, you can enjoy the rest of your life with someone you know you're meant to be with, who is truly compatible with you like no other ever could be. Yes. Bill Cipher always dreamed of finding his other half. And killing him.

Touch Bill will make sure that no one will ever touch his little angel again. He`ll make sure they`ll all pay, and only then can he make his angel pure again.

Saligia Dipper and Mabel return to Gravity Falls five years later to be welcomed by the same amount of weirdness, only this time things get a bit darker. Hormones and supernatural forces make sure nothing goes right and on top of that Dipper has to deal with a horrifying dream demon. Will they solve the ancient mystery they're faced with or will everything go horribly wrong?

Intoxicated Obsession Obsession. That was the one word to describe what he felt towards Dipper Pines. Bill wanted Dipper to love him. And it was driving him insane. Ever since Bill cipher laid his eye on Dipper Pines, he knew that he wanted him, and Bill always got what he wanted.

Monsters "Stanleys recovered memories weren't enough to bring me back." Of course, this wasn't the reason. "It was you, Pine Tree. You and your strange obsession with me." No need to tell him. Dipper knew. It was his fault entirely. "Dipper Pines, you are truly messed up."

The Legacy of a Broken Heart And all my days are trances, And all my nightly dreams Are where thy grey eye glances, And where thy footstep gleams In what ethereal dances, By what eternal streams.

Hidden Beneath Gold In a small village, Dipper and Mabel Pines work to exhaustion to get money for their sick grunkle. Dipper has the most dangerous job and many threats to the people are at large in the forests, mountains, valleys, practically outside of the village. Dipper is willing to do anything for his family and packed with lost hope and negative thoughts, he accidentally stumbles across the most infamous threat to any village.

The Gospel of Dipper Pines "Is what they say true? Pine Tree's dead?"  Dipper Pines spent years going back and forth between his home in California and his summer adventures in Gravity Falls. Mabel Pines spent years trying to tame her bipolar disorder and live a mostly normal life. For years, their lives seemed destined to stay eternally separate from one another. That is until Dipper is murdered. Now, Mabel must piece together the remains of the life her twin once lived if she hopes to discover out who killed him. But Gravity Falls is not a town for the normal and, as Mabel delves deeper into the life Dipper once lived, she has to wonder if she really knew her twin at all. AU in which Dipper went to Gravity Falls alone. Incomplete, but has an ending summary.

Blood, Tears, and Puppy Dog Ears Ever since he could remember, a voice in Dipper's head always told him what to do. After following its orders and murdering the family dog, his parents send him and Mabel away to Gravity Falls, in need of 'fresh air' to 'cure his twisted young mind.' But the voice only intensifies, surrounded by endless mysteries. (A dark Billdip story)

The Triangle Murders To everyone's surprise, after college Mabel went on to become an agent for the FBI while her brother Dipper moved to Gravity Falls to run the shack alongside his great-uncle Stan. Currently following a series of murders, Mabel returns to Gravity Falls on less than ideal terms in order to investigate the latest victim. She hopes that with a little outside help from the closest person to her in the whole world, she can solve this case lickety-split. Can she catch a serial killer that's always two steps ahead and always watching?