#( i love this so much because they would totally sneak off in the middle of anything for a quickie lmao )

[httpsserene]

Heyy, i was wondering if you could do an Toto wolff x reader. I was thinking kitchen sex?? Like Toto getting turned on because he found out that reader was trying to make him his beloved pumpernickel bread for breakfast. I’ve been seeing tiktoks of Toto and his love for pumpernickel bread, and was just wondering if you could write abt it, though it’s TOTALLY ok if you don’t. Sorry if this was a little messy, this is my first time rqsting something. ♥️

𝐭𝐨𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐲 𝐰/𝐭. 𝐰𝐨𝐥𝐟𝐟

📖𝘀𝘂𝗺𝗺𝗮𝗿𝘆: you make toto his favorite bread. he’s going to thank you for this surprise properly. 📖𝗰𝗼𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴: 18+ only. explicit. implied age gap. kitchen sex. rambling about bread. unprotected sex. vaginal sex. morning sex. reader and toto are married. beta-read. 📖𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗱 𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗻𝘁: 2.2k words 📖𝗽𝗮𝗶𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴: toto wolff x fem!black!reader 📖𝗴𝗲𝗻𝗿𝗲: oneshot. 📖𝘀𝗼𝘂𝗻𝗱𝘁𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸: can't take my eyes off of you (i love you baby) • lauryn hill

𝗽𝗿𝗲𝗳𝗮𝗰𝗲: can you tell i did way to much research on the types of pumpernickel bread? no, well, i don’t care 🙂 i WAS NOT familiar with toto wolff and pumpernickel bread so a quick youtube search opened my eyes to it and uh what can i say, this was born. ALSO: i feel like i’ve self-diagnosed myself; i am ashamed to admit that my kink might be somebody making me their wife…because why can’t i go one fic without making the reader be referenced to as a wife (m sorry i crave love). i honestly feel like it could be better, but y’know i hope i did your request justice (sorry it took me so long, ktober beat my ass). anon! i hope you see this, and i hope all the toto wolff lovers enjoy !!!

the yellow dish gloves on your hands protect your brown skin from most of the heat of the scalding tap water. the sound of your hums airily reverberate within the high ceilings of your open-plan kitchen as you clean the expensive dishes you’ve dirtied. you’ve taken off your wedding ring and placed it on top of your phone in the middle of the island to avoid any possibility of it falling down the drain or getting damaged. 

you woke up a little after dawn, quickly shutting off your alarm to avoid waking up your husband; it’s the off season for him, you won’t wake him up at insane hours when he’s not needed to work. sneaking out of bed was a battle of its own—there were several close calls as you struggled to slip out of the tight hold of the austrian man. it took seven minutes for you to escape his warm embrace, but you made it through by thinking of the surprise you were going to cook up for Toto—or bake up for him. it’s no secret to anybody that the mercedes team principal loves pumpernickel bread, and that he’s very particular about how he likes it. of course, there’s no way you would be able to make the traditional german pumpernickel bread before he woke up—it takes fourteen hours to cook and it needs to rest for an entire day to allow it to form properly into its crunchy, cookie-like consistency. so, you decided to make the simplified recipe that only takes roughly an hour and a half to bake and prepare, while the original takes its time cooking. your husband will have to be happy with the more loaf-like treat until his preferred bread is ready. you’ve never been more thankful to have two ovens. 

everything went well. both breads are prepped and baking away at their respective temperatures, and you’re carefully attempting to clean up the mess you’ve made in the process. you may not have been quiet enough based on the footsteps you hear heading your way. Toto pauses in the doorway and you smile, not needing to turn around to see the baffled expression on his face. you turn the faucet off and grab the cloth resting on the oven handle to dry your hands, “good morning, bär. slept well?” you teased gently with a small smile in Toto’s direction. you take an appraising glance of his form; he’s only wearing this pair of pajama pants covered in the mercedes logo (George gifted him those when the team did secret santa last year; Toto said he’d never wear them), leaving his toned torso exposed for your viewing pleasure, sleep lines from his pillow are still faint along his left cheek, and his hair is ruffled like he’s been running his hands through it. your husband nods half-heartedly, and blinks in confusion as he takes in the sight of you in the kitchen.

you're wearing one of his white button-up shirts—half of the buttons are fastened, the sleeves are rolled up and cuffed right above your elbow. you aren’t wearing a bra based on the way he can see how your nipples are pebbled through the shirt, and he assumes you’re only wearing underwear based on your bare legs. your feet are warmed by a pair of black, fuzzy house slippers, the bottom of the shirt rests along the middle of your thighs, and the collar is shifted to the side exposing your collarbone. your hair is free, allowed to rest however it wants to on this winter morning. he starts, making to finally enter the space of the kitchen and give you a proper morning greeting, but notices a smudge of flour along your jawline. and then he sees the baking utensils gathered in the sink, and a rich aroma starts to permeate the air. it smells slightly like coffee and slightly like dark chocolate—it’s sweet. then, it dawned on Toto, you’re baking pumpernickel bread. for him. his heart flutters; you usually sleep as late into the morning as possible, but today, you woke up at an insane hour just to make him his favorite bread from scratch. you’ve always teased him for how difficult he acts about his breakfast treat yet you sacrificed hours of sleep to please him. Toto’s mushy mindset is broken, as you cock your head at him, wondering why he hasn’t responded to you, and the collar of his your shirt shifts and falls to expose the top of your chest. mmm, yes, he should thank you properly.

you don’t even have time to register toto crossing the space between you, before your lips are interlocked in a passionate kiss. a shocked squeal is muffled against toto’s lips, as his large hands hold your waist steady, and your own hand flies up to hold his head. your other hand rises to tap at his chest frantically, as you begin to run out of air, and toto pulls away with an amused chuckle. dazedly, your hand on his chest pulls back to touch your lips, like you needed further verification that he just kissed you. 

Toto smirks, “good morning, schatz.”

you nod unsteadily, “yes—g-good morning.”

your husband laughs louder at your stutter, and tugs you into his chest for a proper hug, rubbing at the nape of your neck with a heavy hand. the two of you stand tangled in the middle of the kitchen, uncaring of how many seconds fly by, and your eyes flutter shut at the relaxing motion of Toto’s massaging hands. 

“i’m going to fuck you on the island, now, “ Toto informs you kindly.

you startle, pulling your head back to stare up at him with wide eyes. his gaze is serious, and you can’t help how your cheeks warm under his attention.

“well…” you murmur, “i’m not going to say no.”

from there, it’s all a rushed haze. you go from having two feet firmly planted on the tiled floor to being lifted and placed on the marble island as toto speeds through unbuttoning your collared shirt. you try to shrug it off, but Toto halts your motions firmly telling you to leave it on. you hum absently and pull him into a kiss. Toto moans into your mouth, and the sound has your hips bucking forwarding to grind against the bulge in his pants. his hands reaches for your left hip and assists you in grinding against him, and a sigh of pleasure parts your lips. the austrian eagerly slips his tongue into your mouth, and he tastes a bit of sugar from whatever you snacked on while making his bread. oddly, that causes more of his blood to rush south and he breaks the kiss to lean back and tug your panties off. 

you simultaneously pull his pajama pants down, and squirm happily at the fact that he slept without boxers. Toto gently guides you to lie back on the countertop, and coos softly when you shiver from the cold surface; he’ll warm you up soon. he pulls your panties off from where they were dangling around your right ankle and drops them to the floor, kicking them to the side along with his pants. tugging you forward, your ass rests on the edge of the counter and he leans down to press kisses on your throat.

moaning highly, you crane your neck to expose its full length to his mercy. your right hand tangles in his hair to guide him exactly where you want, your left hand holds at his shoulder for support, with your nails digging into the meat of his muscles. Toto pauses, and pulls back to grab your left hand. a broken whine falls from your lips, and you buck your hips upward searching for friction, the slide of his cock along your folds feels delicious. his knees buckle at the sensation, and he forces your hips back down with his free hand, as he pulls your left hand in front of him to look at it.

“where’s your ring, liebling?” Toto asks, warm eyes focused on your bare ring finger. you laugh disbelievingly, amused and surprised at the fact that he managed to feel the absence of your wedding ring, and pull your hand out of his grasp smoothly. you reach behind you and pluck your ring from its spot on top of your phone, and slide it back on your finger. brandishing your ringed-hand in his eyeline, you impatiently try and buck your hips upward to no avail, his one-handed hold on you is unbreakable. 

“okay! fuck me—now, please,” you demand desperately.

Toto hushes you, and holds your left hand steady. he stares into your eyes as he presses a kiss on the wedding ring he bestowed you with. your cheeks burn hot, and you roll your eyes as if your heart didn’t liquify at the show of devotion. your husband guides himself to your entrance, and pushes in carefully—thankful he fucked you open last night. you whimper softly, tender and sore, but you nod frantically to encourage Toto to push further in. he groans throatily as he bottoms out, throwing his head back in pleasure, and your moan harmonizes at the feeling of fullness. the stretch burns slightly, but you’re more focused on achieving an orgasm than the space he caves out in your walls. 

you squeeze your knees around his waist, and grind up on him to encourage him to move. Toto grabs your left leg, bringing it to rest over his shoulder, while your right leg remains resting on his waist, both fuzzy slippers falling from your feet at the movement. it has him sliding slightly deeper inside you, and a spark of pleasure races up your spine. Toto begins to thrust, setting a quick pace from the get go. he fucked you open eight hours ago and the tightness of your cunt has him considering that he didn’t fuck you well enough. the bruises in the shape of his hands on your hips suggest differently. it’s ridiculous, how lost the two you get in each other’s bodies. your moans are punched out of you with every thrust, his cock dragging against your most pleasurable spot every time he sinks in you. Toto should be embarrassed at how quickly this is ending, but your sounds are too erotic for there to be any other outcome. 

he lays his hand on your navel, gently adding pressure over where he’s reaching inside of you, while his thumb circles rapidly over your clit. your back arches sharply as you screech from the unexpected flare of pleasure, raking your nails down his back in thin red lines as you cum at the added stimulation. it’s a multitude of sensations and emotions that had you hurtling over the edge quicker than you thought possible, and Toto has no choice but to follow you into the abyss, unable to hold back his orgasm at the unbearably hot and wet grasp of your cunt. your husband rocks into you through the afterglow, pausing only when you start to whimper in too much, and not feeling good. staring up at toto with a blissed-out smile and half-lidded eyes, you sigh sweetly as he slips out and leans down to kiss you again. the press of his lips is syrupy sweet and you find yourself getting lost under the feeling of him pouring his love and devotion into you—even though you don’t need the reminder—and the timer you’ve set on your phone blares jarringly causing you and toto to jump apart, startled. 

“what the fuck,” Toto deadpans as you scramble around to turn off the alarm. 

you sigh in relief once the aggravating sound is silenced, and nudge at Toto’s hip with your foot, “well—don’t just stand there! get the bread out before it burns!”

the austrian huffs exaggeratedly, like it’s such a chore, and pulls on the oven mitts to take out the pumpernickel bread adaptation after you direct him to the proper oven, not wanting him to disturb the traditional bread baking. the sight of the known headphone-smashing, hothead mercedes team principal completely naked spare for a pair of oven mitts is amusing, enough that you can’t quiet your snort, uncaring of how Toto glares at you. he places the baking tin on the cooling rack you set to the side, and hums happily at the aroma—even though it’s a far cry from the usual bread he prefers. like the oaf he is, Toto reaches to pull a piece of the fresh pumpernickel to eat, but with lightning quick speed you reach over and slap his hand away before he defiles the bread. 

“aht aht! what do you think you're doing? it needs at least forty-five minutes to cool before you can take a slice,” you scold the grown man.

Toto pouts (astounding, honestly), and then he brightens considerably, a sleazy smirk spreading across his lips, “ah? we have time for a second round then, maybe three…” you laugh hysterically, ignoring the way your stomach flips pleasingly at the suggestion, and slide off the counter, buttoning up your collared shirt, and you bend down to pick up the discarded pieces of clothing lying on the floor, “there’s no way you manage to get hard twice in forty-five minutes, old man–” Toto balks at your words–he’s really not old, or at least not that old, “–however, it’s enough time to finish washing the dishes you distracted me from doing.”

taglist: @saintslewi@cherry2stems@lorarri@inloveallthetime@mindless-rock@biancathecool@barnestatic @my-ylenia @katekipshidze @darleneslane @lovingaphroditesworld @smoothopz

© httpsserene2023

[a-hazbin-reader]

K so I loved your egg and dog, why not next a real kid. The cannibal kids, like the kids adore y/n when ever she comes to town to visit. They do multiple fun activities like makeing flower crowns or just somthing as simple as hopscotch!

(Proves y/n would be a good mom.)

Y/N would be a good mom!! I believe in her!!

Alastor X Reader Headcanons

✅️Romantic

❌️Platonic

TW: Children in mild danger, Cartoonish antics, Reader wants children, Alastor being possessive, Sad implications

Description: 👆⬆️

Alastor likes taking you to Cannibal Town, he likes that everyone there loves you nearly as much as he does

He likes showing you off and letting Rosie brag about you for him

Because she totally brags about you, not letting Alastor get a word out to say it himself

And the children all listen to Rosie so they quickly turn their attention on you with sparkling eyes and grabby hands

And you are immediately enamored with them too, giving them tight squeezes and gentle pecks on their chubby cheeks

It's adorable that the children have taken such a shine to you, really it is

"Y/N! Y/N! Come play with us!"

"Alright~ Alright~"

Not the littlest one leading you by holding onto your finger

And the way you indulge them just makes his heart melt, watching you play along with their antics

You mend their clothes for them, bandage their boo-boos, bring them snacks so they aren't tempted to gnaw on each other

Or you

Plus it gives him time to chat with Rosie or shop for surprise gifts for you so he doesn't necessarily mind it

Except those kids never seem to run out of energy or get sick of your attention

Sometimes he finds you surrounded by them, all of you snuggled up together and relaxed

Are those flowers in your hair?

Yes, yes they are.

Or you'll seek him out, one child on your shoulders and another in your arms, both asleep

But your husband wants to take you home and get some snuggles with you for himself

And cannibal children are fucking ruthless when it comes to something they want so he has to get creative to get his wife back

"Here~! Have some scissors! Run as fast as you can with them~!"

"ALASTOR!"

"Oh fuck-"

They 100% fight back though, those children are smart and ruthless, quick to realize Alastor is competition

That's part of why he likes the cannibal children so much tbh

They will literally throw him in a well if it means spending five more minutes with you

It becomes a cartoonish war between Alastor and the children, one with little malice but many dangerous antics on both ends

With you in the middle

You even start to play along, picking different sides at random and turning things into a game

It's totally not an excuse to watch your husband play with children and it definitely doesn't make your heart ache

Once Alastor stops to realize how you're looking at him and sees how much warmth your gaze holds then he starts to understand something

Something that makes his heart throb a little but he tucks it away for when you two are alone

Alastor starts to join you in hanging out with the children after that, enjoying the maternal side of you more than he would care to admit

And seeing him act even remotely fatherly is obviously doing things for you so that's a bonus for him too

You two are constantly followed by a gaggle of children now, the two of you looking like duck parents

If you run into any of the overlords then Alastor will pit the kids against them, telling them to get their Aunty/Uncle

Bonus points if its Vox and they take off a piece of him and bring it back to Alastor

They love biting their Uncle Vox~

They even visit you two at the hotel sometimes, all of them storming the building and wreaking havoc until they find your room

Not all of them trying to sneak into bed with you two as silently as possible

Okay no-

He's going to start locking doors now

Go ahead, old man they'll just break them down

Alastor totally doesn't make them Charlie and Vaggie's problem afterwards just so that he can have some peace

More cuddles with his wife please

"Alastor...we should get the children home..."

"Five more minutes, my dear~"

How can you say no to him when he's kissing your neck like that?

Five more minutes

He's amused when you try to explain away the love marks on your neck and shoulders in a PG way

Kids ask the silliest questions, don't they?

You always sigh happily at the end of the day once the kids have gone home, leaning on your husband

You look tired but happy, Alastor committing the look to memory

He catches you staring at the kids fondly and looking at baby clothes a little more often

Maybe you hold a baby for a little too long, voice a little too thick with emotion

It's obvious to him that being around the children makes you happy but also makes you wish for something more

And all he wants is his wife to be happy

So maybe he should have that conversation with you that he's been putting off for awhile

Alastor isn't really a coward, but when it comes to difficult conversations with you, he's definitely reluctant

He doesn't like to see you get worked up and if the conversation goes where he thinks it's going to go then...you're gonna get upset

Waits until the two of you are snuggled up together in bed, his arm wrapped snuggly around you

You're nearly asleep, happily breathing in your husband's scent and lazily stroking his chest

"Y/N...do you want a family with me?"

Now you're wide awake

🥹🥺🥹 literally me after this

[yandere-sins]

“he follows until you are pressed to the cold wall, his arm around you, pulling you back so you wouldn’t have to be cold all night”

this made me remember that bed post, of how couples sleep Vs how single ppl sleep. Single ppl often have their bed up against the wall, cause it saves space and they don’t need to worry about falling off the bed, while couple usually have their bed in the middle with the headboard against the wall and the sides not touching anything, and that makes it easier for one of them to get up without having to disturb the other. This made me think… it would be such a yandere thing to do to have the bed pressed up against the wall anyways, so their darling can’t leave without them knowing or waking up. It just feels like such a subtly controlling action, where the darling wouldn’t be able to even go to the washroom in the middle of the night without the yandere allowing it. I mean, they prob would have had to wake up the yandere anyways if the yandere hugs them in their sleep, but this is still make the darling feel even more confined mentally, because they know that there is no way that they could sneak out so they would stress over whether they should wake up the yandere or if they would be able to tolerate it till morning comes. It makes you wonder if the yandere did it on purpose or by accident, especially if the yandere lives in a spacious house so there is no actual need to press the bed against the wall… ah, I just think it makes for a very nice small detail in this kind of scenario ☺️

(Sorry if this is rambling, I just woke up so my brain is muddled lol)

I haven't heard about that theory before! But it makes sense, now that I think about it :D

(Warning: Yandere, Sexual Mentions)

I can totally see yans taking advantage of that. Two entrances to the same bed are just taking up sooo much space (even if the room is completely empty otherwise, hehe). Why not make sure the darling has to do impossible aerobics to get on top and over their captor if they want to get out? Oh, the darling is such a tease, accidentally loosing their footing and waking the yandere with the beautiful sight of their darling on top of them. And then there's the wonderful spiel of:

"I just need to go to the toilet."

"Sure you do, darling."

Even if he yan knows the truth they just grip their darling's waist, keeping them in place and teasing them a little before allowing them to finally get off their captor and to the bathroom, the yan always following of course, yawning but excited to be up with their darling.

Or the very clingy yans that cannot imagine sleeping separately from their darling, even if the darling is sweating bullets because it's so damn hot in the room and locked in the yan's arms around them. They already abstain from drinking before going to bed, knowing they won't be able to free themselves of the yan's hold, so now they just hope to pass out from heatstroke or dehydration 'cause they are so fucking tired but can't sleep.

And then, of course, there's the aspect of being able to watch their darling all night long. It might take them a while with their captor staring down at them for hours to no end. How could they sleep with their sweet love right next to them? Pass up the chance to leave fluttering touches all over their bodies and whisper sweet nothings into their ear while they dream (hopefully of the yandere)? Never! They're just looking out for you—protecting you even! But the pleasure is all theirs, and the yan soaks up ever little utter or whimper from their darling, drunk on the vulnerable sight of their most precious darling. ♥

Oh, and can you imagine, those really mean yandere that drug their darlings? They are so freaking overjoyed when their darling is searching for any kind of comfort, after the yan put them into bed, while their brain is a huge mess. Darlings that cry and sob, but then bury their face in the yan's chest and the yan just instantly has a huge grin on their face as they pat their darlings head and rub their back, telling them everything is okay. They try to be empathetic but they just can't stop grinning, loosing their freaking mind from excitement. Yans who get so fucking hard/wet from their darling inching as close as possible to them, scared of some imaginary monsters they are trying to hide from, not realizing the monster is right in front of them.

Last but not least, sharing a bed doesn't just mean sharing a mattress. There's also just one blanket and one pillow, and the darling will be forced to stay near and rest their head on the yan's arm or chest. There's no escaping that, so they'll eventually admit defeat due to being so tired. But the morning after is when things get really interesting. When the mood shifts from sleepy to horny real quick, the yan not wanting to lose the warmth they shared all night, as always insatiable for their darling.

Thanks for sharing your thoughts!

[kinopio-writes]

Hey love your works they are absolutely fantastic ❤️

This is an odd request but would you mind doing a Adam x Fem! Reader that is in the situation like Morty and Mr. Jellybean was? It is 100% a-okay if you don’t do this especially if it’s uncomfortable but I just wanted to know Adams reaction. Ignore if you are uncomfortable and/or just don’t want to do this ask!

Love your works!! 🥰🥰

A/N: Aww, thank you for the kind words :] I only have two works in total, lol. And, uh, I haven’t watched Rick and Morty, but I did search for some scenes on YouTube. Based on what I saw, do you mean to say how Adam would react if the reader was sexually harassed? Tell me if I’m wrong because holy hell did watching the scenes make me uncomfortable. And someone commented that it’s a really accurate depiction of what happens. Disturbing.

Words: 1,034 (not including the bullet points)

Warnings: Sexual harassment implied, Violence (because of Adam)

———

How Adam would react if Fem!Reader was sexually harassed…

In the middle of writing this, I just remembered that they live in Heaven. So I don’t know how or why a molester would end up in Heaven. Even if there was one, they likely got booted off immediately, so just imagine a sinner somehow managed to sneak into Heaven.

• Adam’s reaction would completely change depending on who you are to him (if you two just met for a date or are casual bang buddies)

• so I’ll just give you the best one for comfort (at least the best Adam could give) and make you two be in a close relationship (not GF and BF though. But you two go on not-so-platonic dates sometimes)

• I also think it’s good to mention that I try to keep Adam’s character as accurate as possible

• it might make him seem insensitive, so I suggest going to the last section if you’re here for comfort (the last section has a blue ‘•••’)

———

Adam recommended a place that had been recently open for a while. He actually burst through your front door to go there the day it was open.

Unfortunately for him, you were busy and will be for the next few weeks as well. Something about work that he didn’t bother to listen to because it was, well, about boring shit.

But now, you managed to get the whole week off, so Adam has you all for himself. And his first action of business was to get you to chillax. What better way to do that than to hang out with him?

He was so fucking hyped. He couldn’t wait to see the look on your face when you try out the food there!

You two were going to have so much fun!

•••

“We need to go,” was what you suddenly decided after you came back from the bathroom, voice emotionless and firm.

Adam stared at you as if you grew horns and a tail. “Why? The fuck happened?”

Your face faltered at his question. “We need to go. Please.”

“Uh, it hasn’t even been an hour. Now get over here and fucking eat.” You only did so after a moment he munched on his burger, but not in the way he expected. You hid near his seat, gripping on the legs as you made yourself as small as possible. “The fuck are you doing?” He paused before grinning suggestively. “Learn some decency, (Name), jeez. If you wanted to…suck…”

Adam trailed off as he watched someone come out of the women’s bathroom, badly beaten and bruised. He…it didn’t have a halo on its head, and its attempt to cover up its slender and angled horns was fucking stupid.

His playful expression dropped and it shifted to anger when he saw it looking around, around for you.

You suddenly felt a strong gust of wind as the plates and glasses clattered on the table you were hiding behind. You peeked from your spot to witness Adam ruthlessly and relentlessly punch the sinner’s face, a hand slowly going over your mouth at the display of violence. You didn’t know he could be so brutal. He was saying things that didn’t reach your ears, but you knew they weren’t pleasant.

You only felt yourself move after you saw Adam lift his arms in the air, hands accompanied by holy light. “Wait! Adam, Adam, stop!”

“What!” He turned around to face you momentarily as he shrugged your hand off of his shoulder. “Let me at ʼim—!”

“Adam, you’re causing a scene,” you whispered, glancing around at the growing audience.

Adam was offended. “I’m helping!” He flapped his wings to stand up, his anger now directed at you. “You’re just going to let a Sinner do you like that? Huh!”

“I just want to go home.”

He stared at your face for a moment. “Whatever.” He scowled at the Sinner one last time before he began making his way outside. You quietly followed after him. “This place is lame, anyway.”

The whole walk, you kept your head down as Adam gave the finger and a nasty look to anyone who ignorantly tried to approach you to cheer you up.

•••

You didn’t know when you got home; you didn’t even know Adam stayed with you until he spoke up.

“Uh…do you need, like, shit, I dunno…something?” You heard the ruffling of his wings and the shuffling of his clothing. “I could order delivery. There’s this place I’ve been…” You further curled yourself into a ball on your bed. You didn’t remember when you got there. “Actually, maybe you should pick where this time, huh? How’s that sound?”

When you didn’t respond, Adam lowered his arms, his smile fading into a frown.

He debated whether or not to leave you here before you scooted to the farthest side of the bed, turning yourself over to face him but avoiding eye contact as you patted the spot you were just in.

Adam took one glance behind him before he slipped into bed beside you, hands on his tummy as he stared at your ceiling.

The silence was uncomfortable for Adam. He desperately wanted to fill it with some chatter. Without it, it felt as though there was no one with him in the room.

As if you read his mind, your hands hugged his arm, and it numbed his unease, if only for a moment. He extended the time by placing a hand on yours, caressing them with his thumb.

“I don’t want to see this,” you suddenly spoke after a minute.

“Huh?” He looked down at you, still not making eye contact with him.

“Take your mask off.”

He scoffed and turned down your request, “You’re not even looking at me.”

“Take it off,” you repeated more firmly.

“Why?”

“Then I’ll take it off.” You reached out to grab his horns, pulling them upwards. When it didn’t comply, you kneeled on the bed and pulled harder. “How do you take it off?”

“Why do you wanna see me so badly? Just go to sleep already.”

“Not until you take that off.”

“I’ll stay with you until you wake up,” he attempted to bargain.

“Adam.” You gave up on removing his mask yourself. “Take it off.”

He hesitated before sighing heavily, easily tugging it off of his head and tossing it on the nightstand.

With his real face revealed, you were able to look at him. His golden eyes brought you solace, and his human-like features gave you relief.

“There. Better?” he asked bitterly as he averted his eyes from yours. “Now go to sleep.” After that, Adam tried to face his back toward you, but you leaned over and held his face and shoulder, pulling him back. “What is it now—”

“You said you’ll stay with me until I wake up.”

“I will,” he said as if you were doubting him, but he knew you weren’t.

Satisfied with his promise, you stared into the soft glow of his eyes as yours started to grow heavy.

In the last moments of your consciousness, you felt yourself get pulled closer to something soft, and you heard the sound of ruffling as warmth enveloped you.

[bagofshinyrocks]

Matchy Matchy!

Prompt: For the Twelve Days of Christmas, you get Simon and yourself some matching presents. [Requested by @ertepla]

Featuring: Simon Riley x GN!Reader

Word Count: 1.6k

Warnings: profanity, slightly suggestive at the end

“How many presents do you get on the Twelfth Day of Christmas?”

“Twelve.”

“Nope.”

Simon fixed you with a withering look. He was elbow deep in a bubbly sink, with a smiley-face sponge in one hand, and the breakfast plates in the other. Not his scariest moment.

“What do you mean no?” He started muttering the words to the final stanza. “ ‘On the twelfth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, twelve drummers drumming.’ Yeah, twelve.”

You put down the clean dish and rag. “Bubba, twelve drummers drumming, and… eleven pipers piping and all the others.”

Simon blinked. “Goddamnit.” The sponge splashed into the suds. “Is that what the song was sayin’ the whole damn time?”

You nodded and cupped his face in your hands.

“That’s so many fucking presents.”

“Seventy-eight on the last day. And a total of three hundred and sixty-four presents over the twelve days.”

His hands settled on your hips and tugged you closer. A loving, warm kiss. A quick swipe of his tongue against your lips. Then pulled away and settled his forehead against yours.

“Lovie, you are my everything. I love you so fuckin’ much. But, I’m not getting you more than three hundred gifts.”

You laugh and pulled him back for another kiss.

“Sweetie,” a kiss to his nose, both of his cheeks, and then his chin. “It’s just trivia. Something you can trick your buddies with tomorrow.”

He hummed, then smiled. “I’ll start with Johnny.”

“Poor Johnny.”

You would have liked for Simon to have a Christmas break and spend the season with you, but alas, that was not the case. He was deployed December 10th, and was supposed to be back a month and a half later.

He was very upset about it. You were disappointed, but he was straight pissed. 

One hand settled in your jean pocket as he requested you walk with him as far as a civilian could go. Puppy dog eyes when saying goodbye. Lifting his balaclava just enough to kiss you goodbye. Then fucking glowering at everyone else on base.

Just because he wouldn’t get home till the middle of January didn’t mean you couldn’t celebrate Christmas. You would just do it a little later.

In Hallmark movie-fashion, Simon was permitted to go home on December 23rd. Likely from being such a royal pain in everyone’s asses.

So one day early, a big man was creeping through your house. Dropping his gear and uniform on his path from the front door to the bedroom, like a strip tease. That one of you would trip over and shatter your toes on.

According to Simon, you were snoring when he came in. You didn’t stir when he started the shower or when he rifled through the closet to find one pair of his sleep clothes that you hadn’t commandeered. His favorite hoodie had been placed on the biggest pillow, and you had drooled a decent puddle into it.

You finally woke up when he leaned up on you and wrapped himself around you like a weighted blanket.

“Happy Christmas, lovie.”

Incoherent grumble, then a little flail.

“It’s me, lovie. It’s your Simon.”

Less flailing, and instead you wiggled around till you were on your back and Simon’s head rested on your shoulder, pressing kisses against your cheek and neck.

“A good surprise, baby?”

A sleepy smile he more felt and heard than saw.

“Very good surprise, Si. I’m glad you’re here.”

One hand scratched his shower-damp scalp and the other scratched his back. Your hands were cold, but his back was a personal hand heater, and he was long since accustomed to the horrible ice-blocks you called your hands and feet.

“Go back to sleep, lovie. I’ll tell you about it in the morning.”

A sleepy hum. Your leg propped up and then flung itself over his legs. No sneaking off for him, not that he would be awake much longer. Or that, in the dark of the apartment, he had seen the pile of presents under the tree all addressed to him.

Instead of small children jumping on the bed to wake you up for presents (a day early), the cat crawled out of her special blankie on Simon’s side of the bed and decided it was time for breakfast. 

The weakest link was home early, so she went straight to Simon. Standing on his back and sniffing him. Then smacking his head until he woke up.

The doormat untangled himself and tucked you back in. The victor leaped off the bed and pranced with her tail up like a flag to her food bowl. Simon was the moron who taught her that breakfast always came at 7AM, so he had to feed her when he was home. When it was just you, the meanest and worst parent, you fed her whenever you decided to wake up. But you also let her sleep in the bed, making a nest out of her special blankie and keeping her warm, whereas he would grab her around the middle and toss.

After feeding the cat, he started piling up his gear out of the walkway. And that’s when he saw the pile of presents.

Like twenty of them. With an array of wrapping papers and bags.

He tiptoed over and knelt in front of them, counting and checking the names. Half of them were for him, and each of his had a matching gift of the same size and wrap for you. According to the tags, all but one of his presents were from you, and all the rest were from the cat.

The cat then stepped on one of the presents, crinkling it loudly and thinking about clawing it. A quick movement of his arm and he had her by the middle and yoinked her into his chest. She looked around in bafflement and then meowed in protest.

Footsteps from the bedroom and you barked a “hey”.

Simon turned with a guilty face.

“Oh, not you baby,” you said, rubbing your face. “I thought the cat was getting into the presents again. I’ve already had to re-wrap things thanks to her Royal Snoopiness and her evil toesies.”

“Evil?” he kissed the cat on the head. “She’s a bomb-sniffing cat.”

“There are no bombs, Simon.” You flopped onto the couch and arranged the pillows to make another nest. “Just gifts. She wants her presents but she doesn’t get them until Christmas morning.”

Simon sat next to your legs and put the cat on your chest. Then leaned in real close and kissed you over her little head.

“Do I have to wait until I get back in January?”

You sat up and pulled him close, the cat leaping off and jumping to the top of her apartment complex. Your hands crept under the hem of his hoodie and pressed into the flaming heat of his back.

“No, baby, you can open them now.”

A kiss. Another kiss. Then he slunk back to the pile of presents and picked up the one the cat had tried to claw open a few minutes earlier. A final look to you, as if asking for permission. Then tore it open. He knew it was an item of clothing, or maybe a blanket. Once he read the front of the hoodie, he burst into laughter.

A skeleton cat holding up both its middle fingers, with ‘Best Cat Dad’ in print beneath it.

“All of the clothes and blankets in there have already been washed, so you can put it on now if you want.”

He hurled his sweatshirt at your head and immediately pulled the new one on. The cat came to investigate and sniffed his sleeves as he opened some of the others.

A new wristband for his watch. Another bottle of his (and your) favorite cologne. Then he grabbed a small gift bag that was very light. You recognized it and started giggling.

He balled the tissue paper and bounced it off your forehead. Then looked into the bag. A beat of silence. You bit your lip and dare not laugh.

He lifted the content between his thumb and forefinger and gave you an incredulous look.

“Are these fuckin’ ‘Hello Kitty’ knickers?”

An unattractive snort and you rolled off the couch.

“Please, Si. Please put them on. For me. It’s a matching set.” You army crawled towards him while wheezing with laughter. “We can match. Please. Please.”

He sling-shot your pair at you and stomped off with the Hello Kitty boxers in his grip. He was going to change in the bathroom. Just for you.

They were… comfortable. He had worn Calvin Klein before, usually when matching with you. But the little pink bows and the cute white cat right on top of his package was not a pattern he would have chosen. He pulled his sweatpants back on and walked out to you with a sigh.

“Alright, I’m wearing the-”

You were sitting on the couch, in your matching Hello Kitty set. Just your matching set. Brown eyes blinked. The two of you were equally surprised at the other. Then it finally clicked, and he jumped and started shucking off his clothes. 

“Missed that memo, lovie. Bit slow this morning.”

Enjoy reading this? Here's a link to my other works! Thanks for reading :-)

Posted: 2023 Dec 23

[livwritesstuff]

i hit 100 followers while i was asleep (absolutely bananas imo but i’m so thrilled y’all are enjoying my steddie dads verse bc i’ve literally never had so much fun writing before) so here's a sneak peek of a wip featuring the Harrington fam

Eddie does not understand sports. 

He may be approaching fifty years old and way past his old ways of rejecting every notion that doesn’t perfectly align with his own interests, but even after all these years, the wires in his brain simply cannot wrap themselves around sports no matter how hard he tries.

And he does try because, naturally, he has three daughters, Moe, Robbie, and Hazel, all of whom play sports.

To be clear – his kids can do literally anything they want, bar none.

He’s still in goddamn awe with the whole arrangement that is the life he lives every day – kids and a house and a job he loves and all that with Steve Harrington of all people. There’s no way Eddie would start fucking all that up by projecting his own weird quirks onto his children. He refuses to be the kind of parent that prevents their kids from doing anything just because they don't get it. If the girls want to play sports, they’re gonna play sports. Nothing wrong with that.

Still, sports are one of those things he takes the back seat and lets Steve hold the reins for, especially now that thirteen-year-old Moe is pretty deep into the whole basketball thing. 

Steve understands the politics of the game, both on the court — like knowing which refs are gonna be biased towards which team and noting Moe’s play-time each game — and off. He schmoozes the coach, he’s friends with all the parents, all the things Moe, at thirteen, doesn’t even notice and Eddie, while aware of it, doesn’t understand. He still can barely follow the games themselves (and he goes to as many as he can, though he and Steve are outnumbered by one and with the prospect of the girls carting themselves around still a distant fantasy their schedule is insane so he can’t make them all). He does his best to follow his husband’s lead but Steve doesn’t always react to things the way Eddie thinks he will. He doesn’t bat an eye when a kid gets smacked in the face with a ball, nor at the impossibly loud thud when someone hits the deck (look — he gets the floor is hollow, but it is loud). He’s completely unbothered by the fit Moe throws every game whenever she’s inevitably benched for having an attitude with her opponents or her teammates or the coach or the ref or just about anybody who tries to get in her way.

As is what happened at Moe’s game yesterday.

Eddie hadn’t seen it — well, he’d seen it, but seeing something and understanding what he’s actually looking at are two totally different things. From what he gathers, Moe had missed an easy shot and gotten pissed off in her own little way about it, so she’d launched herself at whoever on the opposing team had gotten their hands on the ball after it ricocheted off the backboard. Unfortunately for Moe, the team they were playing had a reputation for being a little too aggressive for a middle school league, so when she’d hit the ground, she hit it hard. Moe had been pulled off the court by her coach (carded, maybe? Eddie still isn’t sure how that works in basketball) and scowled on the bench for the rest of the game.

Steve had tried to reason with her on the drive home (an interesting choice, in Eddie’s opinion).

“Darling,” he’d said, “I totally understand being upset about missing a layup, but I don’t know how to get it through your head that intentionally fouling someone isn’t the way to go about resolving that emotion. I love you and I support you, but I’m getting tired of watching you play for three minutes and then sit on the bench for the rest of the game.”

“Talk to the coach then,” Moe had grumbled.

“About what?” Steve exclaimed, “Moe — you do it on purpose!”

The conversation had ended not long later because Moe decided to give them both the silent treatment (a clear sign that she knew she was in the wrong even if she didn’t want to admit it) and Eddie thought that was the end of it (for that game, at least). Then, Moe threw them a curveball by spending most of that evening in the bathroom throwing up, at which point she admitted that her head had caught more of that fall during her basketball game than she’d originally let on.

Steve doesn’t mess around with head injuries (for obvious reasons), so the next morning he calls Moe out of school and brings her to their pediatrician to get checked out.

A couple hours after Robbie and Hazel boarded the school bus bound for their elementary school, Steve and Moe return home.

“So what's the verdict?” Ed asks as they enter the kitchen.

“She's concussed,” Steve announces.

“Like father, like daughter.”

“No sports, no bright lights, no reading, no school, no phone,” Steve says pointedly, and Moe only scowls harder. She’d been using the incident as a leveraging tactic in her crusade to get a phone. Not being able to play sports was a no-brainer; they’d all seen that one coming, so even as recently as this morning, she’d been claiming that she’ll “die of boredom without a phone,” while she recovers.

Even as recently as this morning, she’d been largely unsuccessful.

“Thirteen-year-old children do not need phones,” Steve had told her, “If someone wants to talk to you, they can call the house, and if it's urgent enough that it needs to be right now, you can get walkie talkies.”

“No one uses walkie talkies.”

“Your dad and I used walkie talkies all the time.”

“Uh, pretty sure it was just the one time, Steve,” Eddie pointed out.

“Yeah! And it worked out great!”

CONTINUE ON AO3

[snail-migraine]

Hello! I read your platonic yandere Riddle fic and I absolutely loved it, and I wanna request something.

Since this is Silver birthday week, I was wondering if you could do platonic yandere Silver with a little brother reader who is a bit rebellious?

Jeez I'm writing this super late, but atleast it's getting done! Might be a little ooc because I don't know Silver well, but I tried! Thank you for requesting!

-

Anon-Yan

Platonic Yandere Silver X Male-Reader

Since there wasn't much context given, I'm gonna say reader in this scenario is another human son Lilia adopted. Kinda just finding reader out in the middle of the woods with only a blanket and a note that said your name, and that you were free for for the taking.

You being the only other human in Silvers life is probably what first got the ball rolling for his yandere tendencies.

Since the moment Lilia brought you home, Silver naturally just gravitated towards you.

From staring at your pudgy little baby-face, to asking if he can help take care of you.

Lilia obviously noticed this and only made his light obsession with you worse.

Like by telling Silver,

"It'll be your job to keep your baby brother safe and sound when he grows up. He'll need his big brother there with him."

Totally helpful.

As you grew up you were constantly guarded by Silver. Literally everywhere you went, he would follow behind like a little duckling.

You want to play alone? Too bad, Silver wants to be there with you.

You never got so much as second of privacy or alone time with Silver around.

Even if you complained to Lilia he was no help.

You just had to deal with being constantly followed for your entire childhood. Never getting a single second of peace.

When it came time for Lilia to go N.R.C. you honestly felt nothing. You never really had the same bond with Lilia as his other sons and was kinda glad to have the prankster out of the house.

However with Lilia gone meant that's Silver became the step-in dad.

You guys were teenagers and way past the age of having to be looked after constantly. But Silver insisted on looking after you more.

That pissed you off and you begun having a rebellious streak.

From Blatant disregard, to sneaking out of the cabin at night you did everything in your power to piss off Silver.

And boy oh boy did it work.

He could deal with you ignoring him, he's fine with it. But you sneaking out? Hell no.

Not only did you piss him off but you scared him half to death.

Especially since when you came back in the morning you bruises and cuts littering your body.

That's when decides to put a quick end to your little rebellion.

..by chaining you to your bed.

"I'm sorry, but I can't see you hurt again. You might not care for yourself but I do. Right now your a danger to yourself. Scream at me all you want, it won't change a thing. But I need you to be safe, okay?"

[bitterbutblue]

COUGH COUGH NEEDING IDEAS??

AM I SUMMONED???

anonymous letters from Robin. she never goes out of anonymous since she doesn’t do this often and doesn’t know how you would think.

then the next day she approaches you, asking about what secret letter you have in hand like she didn’t sneak those into your bag herself :3

Bonus if you tell her anonymous letters aren’t really your thing then just never read it LMFAO

Anyways just need to go back to doing work 🤧

~ 🍷

~ omg we're going back to the LOSER ROBIN AGENDA guys .. in my head the most loser coded IN SECRET is robin (mostly because i love her and im very much attracted to loser coded women even though i am one myself)

making this a high school/college au :] ~

── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ────

⤷ she thinks she's being soooo slick

⤷ robin is your typical popular girl- gorgeous looks and incredible smile and the kindest soul you've ever met. every guy thinks they have a chance with her, and she just laughs at them because we all know what she is

⤷ one day, she sits down next to you in the lecture hall for some fucking reason and you're just like. Okay? Um. Wow.

⤷ You did not focus that entire lecture btw u were focusing on trying to act normal and okay and totally not freaking out that your long term crush was sitting next to you in all her glory

⤷ that evening back at your dorm, you found an odd letter in your bag. no sender name, nothing. just a blank envelope.

⤷ lowkey creeped out so you threw it out

⤷the next day however...

You really didn't expect her to sit next to you again- you spent all of last night rationalising to yourself WHY she would choose to sit next to you of all people. The lecture hall had been quite full at that point, maybe that's why she sat next to you? Maybe her friends just didn't want to go to the 9am lecture, that also made sense. Yeah. That's probably why.

Throwing your bag down on the ground as you collapse into the uncomfortable lecture hall chairs, you sigh in exhaustion. These 9am lectures were really starting to get to you and you're struggling to keep your eyes open as you take a drink of your coffee.

"Hey."

You look up tiredly, only to widen your eyes in shock when you see Robin, once again, standing next to you.

"Can I sit here?"

She sounds awfully nervous, barely looking at you and you just nod in confusion and she smiles at you and you want to squeal. She sits down, body tense as she awkwardly pulls out her iPad and whatever else she needs for the lecture. You wonder why she's acting so off.

"Everything okay?"

Robin freezes, a light pink dusting her cheek as she nods awkwardly.

"Splendid. I mean- I meant great, who says splendid anymore... Jesus..."

You just eye her oddly as she turns redder, mumbling awkwardly to herself.

The entire lecture was the most awkward experience of your life. Robin would not stop side eyeing you and a part of you began to panic- did she find out about your crush on her? Is that why she's acting so weird around you? But why the fuck is she still sitting next to you then? Oh god, you need to avoid her forever from now on. The second the lecture ended, you ran out of that damned hall before Robin even had a chance to open her mouth, your bag already packed 5 minutes before the professor even ended. You missed the way she stares dejectedly at you, a crushed look in her eyes.

She thought you read her letter and hated her.

You thought she found out you were in love with her.

Robin refused for you to end things like that though. In the middle of the goddamn fucking night, as you were studying, a knock on your door.

"What the fuck..." You mumble tiredly, throwing down your pen and walking over to the door to check through the peephole whoever the fuck it would be bothering you at night "March, if it's you I-"

The rest of the sentence dies in your throat, throwing open the door frantically.

"Robin!?"

There she stood, eyes red from tears, sniffling as she hugs her jacket close to her body.

"What the fuck- it's almost 12am! What are you doing?"

"If you don't feel the same way, why don't you just tell me!"

"What??"

You take her hand, pulling you into her room and you miss the way her cheeks flush at the contact and her wings flutter slightly as you slam the door shut.

"What are you talking about?"

"If you don't like me that way, you should just tell me instead of hiding like a coward!" She sniffles

What.

You stare at her, eyes wide and mouth agape and in other circumstances, Robin would've probably laughed.

"What?"

"Don't act dense!"

"What are you talking about??"

Robin groans in frustration, angrily wiping her tears away.

"The letter!"

"Huh?"

"The- what? Did you not read it?" Robin's angry gaze falters when she takes in the full extent of your confusion, and you tilt your head to the side like a lost puppy.

"Wh- that was you??"

"You didn't READ IT?"

"Why would I read a letter addressed to no one."

You two just kind of stare at each other, uncomfortable silence filling the room as Robin begins to flush from embarrassment.

"Wait, so why were you acting weird when the lecture ended?"

Now it was your turn to flush from embarrassment.

"Don't change the subject! What was so important about that letter?"

"You're literally changing the subject as we speak- why were you acting so fucking weird?"

You cleared your throat, crossing your arms in frustration as you awkwardly stared to the side.

Fuck it.

"I thought you found out I had a crush on you and that's why you were acting so weird and awkward around me this morning I'm really sorry we never have to talk about this ever again." You say in one breath as you stare down at your shoes, mumbling quietly.

Silence. She's probably going to storm off any minute now, she'll tell everyone you're a weird lesbian freak, and-

You gasp when you feel a tug down on your collar, and before you know it she has her lips on yours and her hand on your cheek. You sort of just stand there at first, frozen and not knowing what to do.

"Oh no, was that too much? I'm sorry-"

"Huh..."

You just stare at her, dazed as you move your hand up to gently touch your lips and Robin practically melts on the spot.

"I like you too, you dumbass. You would've known if you didn't throw the letter away! Why would you throw a letter away, what if it was something important like-"

"Can you kiss me again?"

That managed to shut Robin up as she turns red again, a shy look forming on her face before stepping close to you, tiptoeing slightly as she places a hand on the back of your neck before kissing you softly and in that moment you really regretted throwing the stupid letter away- but hey, she's kissing you and you're smiling like a kid in a candy store. Can't complain.

[sugar-omi]

Just some brainrot because we love Cove. (Also, your fics are soooo good. Thanks for sharing it with us. I mean omega! and rockstar!cove :o )

So, we have Step 3 Cove in hand some time after Patreon's nsfw moment. MC is obssessed with giving him head, of course. He's so cute when you do...what can I say ? I'm a simple human. So yes they do it often, like casually saying : "Cove, I'm hungry." while you two are casually hanging out. At first he doesn't understand but the look in your eyes convey your message to him.

Most of the time, you'll be totally satisfied with just leaving him all red, dishevelled and flustered. Just having him putty in your hand makes your day. But at some point, when you ask Cove to come to your house (without kinky ideas in mind for once) he asks you if your just horny. While it makes sense, I like imagining that MC decides to not get him off anymore. Obviously until he begs, all red and pent up, for a release.

In the meantime, MC just spent their time teasing him. Light touches, flirty remarks and maybe getting him all worked up while making out only to purposefully stop. The poor guy, will clearly snap if show up at his door, anklet on.

This was a bit long and I'm sorry if there's any mistake as english isn't my first language.

I LOVE YOU ANON IM SO GLAD YOU LIKE ROCKSTAR!COVE TOO HEHE 🙈🙈🙈(omega!cove too, im having sm thoughts abt him lately...) also dw your english is perfect n i feel like you took an exert outta my head LMAO

tags : NSFW, hc's, gn reader, multiple choice dialogue, this just a really big ramble bc i've been a zombie thinking abt this shit n now we're here...., mmm overstim, oral (cove/reader receiving), reader's a TEASE, mind break honestly, ooc but idc 🏌️

he's confused when you first make subtle hints/advances, but i think realization hits him like a truck a millisecond later

for the longest you two wouldn't be able to keep your hands off each other

late at night sneaking into the others room so you can suck cove off, trying to keep all the slurping and gagging noises to a minimum

cove's moans are another struggle, but i say climb on top of him and let him eat you out / suck you off while you suck him off too

ohh his head would SPIN with that

he almost woke up your mom's last week because he moaned a little too loud when he finished

so now you're on top of him, your lovely ass and sex in his face

ahhh he'd be so fucking cute. teary eyed and whining into and drooling all over your cunt / cock, pulling you down onto his face so he can get more of you

also i loveee the thought of sucking him off in his car

realistically, i don't think step 3 cove could even handle the thought, he'd probably faint and hit his head n die LMAO

but arghh it'd be so hot

you went on a nice date, and now you're sitting in the parking lot of a beach far from home late at night, and tonight was so much fun.

shopping, movies, you even got some nice food from a hole in the wall restaurant

and now you're finally alone, no one around to see your boyfriend throw his head back, claw at the steering wheel and moan and babble and try not to thrust up into your mouth because he doesn't wanna hurt you

he's so whiny, and so loud

you've been sneaking around for awhile now, you can't blame him for wanting to be vocal because fuck your hot, wet mouth around his cock is so hot

and definitely doesn't help he's probably overstimulated, his cock so sensitive because you've been touching n sucking him off so much

let alone when he's rubbing one out in the shower before a date/event or in the middle of the night because he had a wet dream about you<333

mmm idk about yall, but i would break him <333

of course he doesn't interpret every touch or invite as sexual, but i also you've ruined him so you can't blame him, its your fault 🤭🤭

so now whenever you rub and squeeze his thigh, or give him a hot kiss, or say something like "cove, i wanna leave now... " or "come over, i miss you <3"

or send him a spicy text, "i had a dirty dream about you, can i come over, please?"

z

also omfg i would be so satisfied with just teasing him too…

i love it so much. it’s the best actually

mm i like having long nails, i’m always thinking about getting a new set/doing your nails all pretty and you’re showing them off to cove then you tell him “i wanna see how they look around your dick”

he’d love that omfg

imagine dragging your nails over his chest, teasing his sensitive nipples before you move down, pulling out his dick and giving languished strokes while you kiss him breathless, only moving onto leaving love bites all over his neck n chest once he’s a drooling, blushing mess <33

i think he’s gotten used to your late night/midday booty calls too

so when you invite him over, he can’t help but anticipate sex

but instead you’ve set up some snacks and a movie you’ve been waiting to come out set up on the TV and now cove looks like a fool with a half hard dick and with how fast he rushed over here

when you ask what’s wrong he’s mumbling, stuttering out how he thought you had ulterior motives for inviting him over…

so now it’s his fault because now he’s set up on your couch with him on your lap, teasing him about how he’s too horny to even imagine his s/o would want a normal date, no ulterior motives whatsoever

how he probably can’t even hold your hand without thinking about how you jerked him off in the bathroom of his workplace

and you’re so fucking right

because some days he can’t even kiss you without remembering his taste on your lips, can’t forget how your legs were trembling on either side of his head and now you’re having lunch with your families

how you’re sharing ice cream and jokes with your friends like you didn’t pull him aside before you left and got him off, begging him to cum, that you need to taste him to get by

omfg i also love the reverse/the consequence of breaking cove this way

because either way, he’s obsessed with you too

needs to taste you, have you… he’s just dying every day to have you under his hands, on his tongue..

and i can’t decide which i love more.. teasing cove bc he needs to have you, or teasing cove bc he gets so wound up from you needing him often

bc both is so delicious, and both of them scratch my brain so much

cove eagerly eating you out / sucking you off at the beach, he can’t even focus on teaching you surfing/surfing with you or building sandcastles, etc. because all he can think about is you n having his mouth on you…

you’ll show him a new outfit or sit in his lap or cuddle up next to him, etc. and now he’s thinking about ruining you in those clothes or sinking onto his knees giving you head while you lay back on the couch, still focused on your show

i love how in the ORCA dinner moment cove gets tense when you touch his thigh

i think he’d definitely be obsessed with you teasing him, working him up, dirty talking him especially

oh fuck i almost forgot. in the first patreon nsfw moment, he loves when you pull away before he finishes and you “don’t want it to end”

so technically this is canon <3333

so he’d definitely love is you pulled up to your date one day, anklet on and looking so lovely

n you’re touching his thigh, telling him how good he looks, kissing him suddenly and then pulling him into a deeper kiss when he gets it together

at some point you end up in his car, too busy swapping spit and slipping your hands where you can to get a feel of each other under those clothes, to even make it home

of course eventually you do, but even then your teasing doesn’t stop

ohhh sitting in his lap, rolling your hips into his, kissing him breathless until he’s babbling

you try to pull away, partially to tease cove but also because its late and his dad will be back any time now

but he convinces you to just get each other off, that you’ll have enough time so please?

and while you’re jerking cove off, you hear cliff’s car pull up and cove has not been quiet whatsoever, you couldn’t possibly risk it

but he’s so desperate, he’s so close to finishing, you can’t stop now!!

on the verge of tears prbly, all blushy and hot and a total mess

babbling about how he’ll be quiet so please make him cum, he’ll be good so please.

he’s such a doll, and he does keep his promise, even if it means shoving your undies in his mouth or muffling him some other way, like with your hands, lips, or sex

or you can let him bite/hide his face in the pillow, messing up his bed from all his squirming…

fuck this turned into such a big ramble tysm for sending this, im sorry i used this as a chance to unleash my apocalypse of horny brainworms LOL

[floydsglasses]

𝙄𝙩𝙨 11 𝙖𝙩 𝙣𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙃𝙚𝙧𝙚 𝙖𝙧𝙚 𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚 𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙚 𝘿𝙖𝙜𝙜𝙚𝙧 𝙎𝙦𝙪𝙖𝙙 𝙝𝙚𝙖𝙙𝙘𝙖𝙣𝙤𝙣𝙨

( I was like half asleep making these)

Bradley if being a naval pilot didn't work out for him he would have joined up to be a major leaguer

Natasha hates horses, she went saddle backing one time as a kid, got bucked off scarred her for life

Javy is always snacking on something, it calms him to have something to chew on (proof Hard Deck Bar scene)

Rueben is the one to ask where is a good place to eat, he has taste and will tell which place is worth trying and which is a skip

Mickey has those little car tree smell things, he likes the strawberry smells because it reminds him of his grandparents

Bob has only ever gotten into one physical fight his entire life, he was in Middle School and was still a quiet kid then, his friend was being beaten up so he stepped in fucked the kid up so bad people looked at him like he was hurt them next (Allah Perks of Being a Wallflower type beat)

Jake is the kind of person who says he isn't picky about his food and yet he will still not let his food touch certain ones

Bob collects Funkos, only ones from like movies he actually enjoys and if had the money would go to conventions

Javy or Bradley, was a lifeguard at a public pool when they were teenagers, and they had little girls trying to "get their attention" like if you know you know they found it amusing

Natasha is a health nut, like she will not leave her local whole foods with out checking every fruit or product she bought without weighting them.

Rueben when he was a kid growing up in Georgia ( he gives me those vibes) he would always sneak out to a park at night watching planes take off from the nearby air force base, inspiring him to join up.

Mickey is a total sports fanatic, like tailgates and front row tickets, he is there and will desperately try to get his friends into game (much like real life)

Javy has the best taste in clothes, like the best style out of the daggers, doesn't matter if he is in sweats and a plain jersey he still has charisma falling from him

Jake was never properly taught how to do certain manly things from his dad like change a tire or check his own oil, so he taught himself how to.

Bradley after losing his dad, he would sneak into his closet and take Goose's bomber jacket, sometimes falling asleep with it in his bed, Carole eventually gave it to him when he was old enough. He wore it out that he had to retire it, never selling it though

Mickey can't shoot whiskey, doesn't matter how much someone tries to get him to do it he can't stand the taste, however tequila and beer he is good with

Rueben is a secret F1 Fan, and secretly checks the stats if he is on a detachment with his phone.

Bob when he was a kid would go to a dude ranch as a kid, and he can still ride a horse better then anyone in his family

Natasha is a great cook, and food is her love language of sorts, recommending what would be better for her friends/partners

Jake used to be artsy when he was a kid, but he grew out of it when his dad took his picture off the fridge even after his mom said not too

Bradley can't really swim well, he can stand shallow water or pools but like lakes and stuff is a no go

Javy was a swimmer in college, he would have gone to the Olympics if not for his love for the navy and his mom encouraging him to chase his dreams

(okay like I said I was half asleep making this so if they don't make much sense then oh well)

[svnoohe4rts]

BEST FRIENDS ! ― sim jaeyun

↳ pairing: inexperienced!jake x fembodied!reader

↳ summary: jake is desperate to lose his virginity, and since you’re his best friend, you agree to help him out.

↳ word count: 4,6k

↳ a/n: hihi !! i decided i’d repost one of my old fics since it never showed up in the tags,, i’ve changed some things, but other than that it’s the exact same fic :’) let’s hope it shows up in the tags this time </3

i’ve also decided this will be the last fic i post before i go on a small hiatus for a while . there’s a lot of things going on right now & i simply don’t have the time to be active, hence why i feel like going on a small hiatus seems necessary. i won’t be back until after new years, so happy christmas & happy new years ! thank u all so much for this amazing year & for all the incredible feedback i’ve gotten, i can’t wait to see what next year has in store for this blog :’) i love each & every one of u, until next time <3 all feedback is appreciated ! <3

i won’t be deleting the original post for this fic, u can find it here !

↳ warnings: SMUT ! MDNI . | mentions porn, protected sex let me know if there’s anything else i should add !

JAKE KNOWS HE SHOULDN’T.

Hell, he knows god damn well he shouldn’t even consider it; but the urge to lose his virginity was stronger than his sense of morality at this point. Desperate times call for desperate measures after all, right?

Jake was a simple man. He jerked off whenever he felt the need to, only watching porn if he felt like his imagination wasn’t enough to satisfy his urges. Jake had kissed at least three girls in total during his twenty years on planet earth, including the one he kissed back at the playground in middle school; it was his first kiss, after all, why wouldn’t he count that one?

It had never gone past kissing though. The most intimate thing he had done was probably grabbing a girl's ass while awkwardly making out at a party and the next most intimate thing he had ever experienced was probably the time a girl's hand accidentally brushed against his crotch. Not that he complained though.

He was content with his right hand, it certainly got the job done and he knew exactly how to give himself the best possible experience; so what was there to possibly complain about? Well, Jake decided to put the blame on Heeseung for that one.

If Heeseung had never walked into the room with the biggest smile Jake had ever seen on his lips back when they were 16, Jake would’ve never found himself in this situation. If Heeseung just hadn’t decided to brag about how he lost his virginity to his prom date the night before, Jake certainly never would’ve questioned his right hand and its ability to satisfy him. But of course, Heeseung just had to tell him all about how amazing it was and that he would never ever jack off ever again because nothing could ever even compare to the feeling he had just experienced, as Heeseung himself had claimed. He became a changed man, he said, and there was no way he’d ever go back to just using his right hand. 

So in a way, Heeseung was definitely the cause of 16-year-old Jake's misery.

Then Jay lost his virginity the following summer. He also claimed he’d never ever go back to jerking off, going into great detail about how he had lost his virginity with the slightly older girl next door while mowing her father's lawn; sneaking into the shed while her father was sitting by the pool, reading the daily newspaper. Jake refused to jerk off that night, staring at the ceiling as he questioned what was so great about sex and why his right hand suddenly couldn’t even compare to a feeling he had never experienced for himself.

No matter how angry and confused Jake was, he found comfort in knowing one thing. It didn’t matter if both Heeseung and Jay had lost their beloved V card, because he still had Sunghoon. 

Sunghoon was also a virgin and Jake was sure about one thing and one thing only; he was most definitely going to lose his virginity before his introverted friend did.

As senior year of high school rolled around, both Jake and Sunghoon were still virgins; which Jake found great comfort in. Knowing he wasn’t the only one in his friend group who was still a virgin comforted him, knowing he wasn’t alone in his misery; knowing he wasn’t the only one who had yet to get his dick wet.

Until one day, Sunghoon showed up at school with the same forsaken smile that both Heeseung and Jay had worn and Jake knew he was doomed the second he spotted his friend’s smile. He didn’t even have to listen to his friend talking about how it happened, the feeling of defeat had already settled in by the time Sunghoon had even said hi.

So moral of the story, if Heeseung never decided it would be a good idea to make Jake question his whole existence back when he was 16, Jake wouldn’t be in this situation.

And that certain situation being him about to ask you, his best friend of many years, to take his virginity. 

‘’Earth to Jake,’’ Your hand waving in front of his eyes snapped him out of his thoughts, slightly jumping in surprise by your sudden action. Jake looked up at you, a chuckle trailing off your lips as you plopped down beside him. ‘’What’s on your mind?’’

He had known you almost his whole life, you had been the one to force him into kissing that one girl at the playground back in middle school after all; no matter how much he whined and refused you were the one who pushed him in front of the swings and cheered him on as he shyly pecked the other girl's lips. You had also been the one to comfort him after the girl ran off, crying about how she didn’t even want to kiss him in the first place; a moment that probably severely bruised Jake's ego for the rest of his life.

He had never even thought of you as anything other than his best friend, the thought of having sex with you never even crossed his mind before. The thought made him cringe, his stomach turning inside out at the thought of ever seeing you naked, almost gagging that one time his dear friend talked about how cute you were and he most definitely would take the opportunity if ever given to him.

And at 19 years old, Jake once again blamed Heeseung for his misery. If Heeseung had never said those words, the thought would never have crossed his mind and he wouldn’t be sitting in your bed rubbing his sweaty palms against his jeans. But thanks to Heeseung and his inability to keep his thoughts to himself, Jake came to the realization that you were probably his best bet at losing his virginity at this point.

But how on earth was he supposed to tell you that without embarrassing himself, possibly scaring your friendship for life? Jake just frowned, shaking his head as he continued to rub his palms against the fabric of his jeans; desperately trying to hide the fact that he was absolutely shitting himself. You cocked an eyebrow, your eyes darting over to his now very obviously sweaty hands. ‘’Is there anything wrong, Jake?’’

‘’No,’’ Yes, there was something very, very wrong. ‘’I mean, not really. I don’t want to talk about it.’’ 

He wasn’t lying, Jake most certainly did not want to talk about what was on his mind. You, on the other hand, were obvious to the fact that your friend was very obviously distressed about something and wasn’t going to let it slide that easily. ‘’C’mon, you can tell me anything.’’

Hey, Y/N, wanna take my virginity? No, he simply could not tell you everything.

 Jake glared at you for a moment, a sigh escaping his lips as he realized you weren’t going to give up until he actually told you what was on his mind. He threw his head back in annoyance, staring at the ceiling as he accepted his fate. He was going to make an absolute fool out of himself, but at least it was with you, the one person who would never make fun of him, right? 

‘’Promise me you won't make fun of me?’’ He mumbled, refusing to look at you as he mentally prepared himself for embarrassment. You only nodded in response, furrowing both your eyebrows; growing slightly worried by your friend's behavior. ‘’You’re acting like something horrible happened, what's up?’’ You asked, your eyes glued to the boy sitting beside you.

Well, something horrible did happen. At least in Jake’s world, this was the most horrifying thing that could possibly ever happen. Jake kept his eyes glued to the ceiling, taking a deep breath before squeezing his eyes shut. ‘’Can you take my virginity?’’

Complete silence fell over the room. Jake kept his eyes shut, too scared to ever open them again; the silence only made him feel even more anxious. At this point, Jake wasn’t even breathing, regretting all his life choices leading up to this very moment, wanting to sink through the ground and simply disappear. It wasn’t until he suddenly heard a loud snort coming from beside him he dared opened his eyes, snapping his head towards you.

The sight in front of him only made him want to disappear from the face of the earth even more. You had one of your hands placed over your mouth, trying your best to suppress your laughter but failed miserably, breaking out into laughter. Jake just stared at you, a frown on his face. ‘’I said don’t make fun of me!’’ Jake groaned, burying his face in both his hands in an attempt to hide his red cheeks as you continued laughing. ‘’I’m sorry,’’ You laughed, tears threatening to spill down your cheeks at this point as you tried controlling your laughter.

‘’Fuck off,’’ Jake mumbled into his hands, his ears turning red from embarrassment. ‘’Just forget I ever said anything.’’ He continued as you wiped the tears that had spilled down your cheeks away, small chuckles still leaving your lips. Another silence fell over the room, the only noise being heard was Jake’s breathing into his hands as he thought about how he was supposed to ever recover from the amount of embarrassment he had just experienced. 

‘’I mean, why not?’’ Your voice suddenly broke the silence, causing Jake to peek through his fingers; his eyes landing on you. ‘’What?’’ He let out, his eyebrows slightly furrowed together as he kept his eyes glued on you. You shrugged in response, looking over at the boy. ‘’You’re my best friend after all, so I don’t see why I wouldn’t help you out.’’

Jake took his hands off his face, his eyes wide as he stared at you in shock.  Now that you had said yes, he had no idea what to do or how to act. He had fully prepared himself for you saying no, but yes? He hadn’t even considered the fact that you might’ve said yes. 

‘’What?’’ He stuttered, causing another chuckle to trail off your lips. ‘’Why are you acting so surprised? You were the one who asked me stupid,’’ You chuckled, Jake's lips parting in surprise. ‘’I mean, I know, but I just,’’ He mumbled, stumbling over his own words as he spoke. ‘’I just didn’t expect you to say yes, alright?’’ He let out, trying to figure out if you were just playing with him or if you were actually being serious.

But by the way you simply just shrugged and by the lack of a playful look on your face, he realized you were actually serious. Oh god, you were actually serious about taking his virginity. ‘’Are you actually serious?’’ He asked once more, letting his hands fall into his lap as he continued looking for any signs that indicated that you were in fact playing a prank on him. You nodded in response, a small smile forming on your lips. ‘’I think it’s better you lose it with me so you don’t have to embarrass yourself when you actually hook up with someone.’’

Jake parted his lips, getting ready to defend himself but quickly realized there was no point in arguing; because you were right. 

He had no clue how to possibly make his first time enjoyable for the other person, hell, he didn’t even know how to make it enjoyable for himself. He was completely clueless, except for all the things his friends told him and the things he had seen in porn, and the things he had pictured in his mind of course; but he knew the things he pictured in his mind were way different from the real thing.

Maybe losing his virginity to you wasn’t as bad after all. Unlike him, you weren’t a virgin and Jake could guarantee you knew way more than he did; plus you were one of his best friends, so what could possibly go wrong? ‘’So, like, when do we do it?’’ Jake stuttered, looking over at you once again. Another chuckle emerged from your throat, moving closer to the boy sitting beside you; Jake's eyes following your every move. ‘’Jake, it’s not an appointment, we don’t need to set a date you know,’’ You joked, but Jake only stared at you with wide eyes.

As you moved closer and Jake could now feel your thigh touching his, he came to the realization that losing his virginity to you was in fact a very bad idea. He had been close to you many times before, it wasn’t unusual for the two of you to get psychical with each other. Holding hands, hugging, and even cuddling while watching a scary movie; it usually wasn’t weird at all. But as your thigh touched his, while talking about you taking his virginity, it felt extremely weird. It felt more than just weird, it felt horrifying. ‘’But how am I supposed to know when if we don’t plan it?’’ He let out, his eyes glued to your thigh; suddenly feeling very aware of the fact that you only kept moving closer.

‘’Jake?’’ You let out, causing him to look up at you; his eyes still wide as he noticed how incredibly close your face now was to his. ‘’Yeah?’’ He breathed, not knowing where to look without his eyes landing on your glossy lips. ‘’Can I kiss you?’’

At that moment, he fully panicked and he was sure it showed by the way his whole body froze; he had never been asked that question before and he certainly did not expect you to be the first person ever to ask him that. He stared at you, your eyes darting between his eyes and lips, waiting for his response. Jake placed his bottom lip between his teeth, nervously nibbling on it; he had gone way too far to say no. ‘’Yes.’’

Before he could even prepare himself, he felt your lips press against his. As he felt your lips press against his own, he suddenly regretted everything. He regretted ever even bringing up the topic, he regretted ever even considering it; why the hell would he ever even want to lose his virginity to his best friend? ‘’Relax, okay?’’ You suddenly murmured, causing Jake to snap back to reality; realizing he hadn’t even kissed you back. 

Fuck it, if he was actually going to lose his virginity, he might as well make the most of it.

So he nodded, closing his eyes as he pressed his lips against yours once again. Your lips felt soft against his, your strawberry lipgloss transferring onto his own; feeling himself slightly relax as you placed one of your hands on the nape of his neck. The kiss was soft and as much as Jake hated to admit it, he was actually enjoying it. With his eyes closed, he didn’t have to face reality; that it was, in fact, his best friend he was kissing.

That was until he felt you shift beside him, your lips still attached to his; suddenly feeling your weight being placed on top of him. He quickly opened his eyes only to see you sitting on top of him, straddling his lap. You must’ve noticed the way he immediately tensed up again, his eyes scanning your figure as a chuckle left your lips. ‘’Don’t think too much about it, okay?’’ You let out, placing your hands on the back of his neck; your eyes meeting.

How was he supposed to not think too much? It wasn’t like it was the first time you sat on his lap like this, but this time was different; this time was very very different compared to your usual play fights where you sometimes ended up on his lap. Jake doesn’t remember you kissing him in those playfights, but that was exactly what was happening right now. He only nodded in response, gulping as you leaned down, pressing your lips against his once again.

Jake once again fluttered his eyes close, trying to focus on your lips moving against his instead of the fact that you were straddling his lips; accidentally grinding against this crotch every now and then. He suddenly felt you grab both his hands, placing them on your hips before returning your hands to the back of his neck. Jake quickly caught on as he slipped his hands under your shirt, your warm skin greeting his cold hands. You hummed in response, causing Jake to relax further into the kiss as he realized he had done something right by slipping his hands under your shirt.

The deeper the kiss got, the more Jake started to believe that maybe this wasn’t as bad of an idea as he had originally thought. The taste of your strawberry lipgloss was now slowly making him want more, his tongue slipping into your mouth; the small moan leaving your lips taking him by surprise. He felt a small smirk forming on his lips as he ran his hands up and down your sides, feeling you slightly tug at his hair; the kiss getting more and more desperate.

‘’You’re not a bad kisser you know,’’ You mumbled into the kiss, causing a shade of red to spread across Jake's cheeks; keeping his lips attached to yours in an attempt to hide his now red cheeks. His hands slowly made their way down your sides, creeping closer and closer to your ass before gently grabbing it; a groan leaving his throat. As he kneaded your ass through your pants, he couldn’t help but press his crotch against your clothed core; now getting slightly impatient. But as your lips left his and your eyes met, he suddenly became nervous; had he done something wrong? Was he moving too fast?

‘’Do you want to take my shirt off?’’ Your words made his now semi-hard cock twitch, beginning for any type of attention as he quickly nodded in relief. You smiled at him as you guided his hands towards the hem of your shirt, watching as he slowly pulled your shirt over your head; revealing your chest. He stared at your chest with wide eyes, the only thing hiding your breasts being your bra; trying his best not to let out a groan. ‘’You can take it off.’’ You let out, causing Jake’s hands to immediately start fiddling with the clasps at the back of your bra.

After a few moments of Jake struggling, insisting that he could do it; your bra slowly slid off your body. Jake couldn’t help but stare at your bare chest, his cock growing harder at the sight of your hard nipples. He had seen you in bikinis multiple times, but something felt different this time; he simply couldn’t tear his eyes off you. ‘’Can I touch them?’’ He managed to get out, his eyes meeting yours. ‘’You don’t have to ask Jake, do whatever you feel comfortable doing.’’ You let out softly, causing Jake to immediately place one of his hands on top of one of your breasts; attaching his lips to one of your nipples.

A loud gasp left your mouth as he swirled his tongue around your hard nipple, his other hand finding its way to your other breast. It was no secret that Jake knew how to use his tongue even though he had never actually done it judging by the way he constantly had his tongue out, you’d be lying if you said you hadn't thought about him and his tongue at least once. But his tongue playing with your nipple while his other hand pinched and massaged your other breast felt way better than you could’ve ever imagined, throwing your head back as a whimper left your lips.

That whimper went straight to Jake's now hard cock, feeling it twitch against one of your thighs. He kept his lips attached to your nipple, his other hand massaging your other boob as he looked up at you. The sight in front of him made him feel like he was about to cum right there and then, feeling the precum leaking from his tip stick to the fabric of his now very tight boxers. You slowly started rocking your hips against this hard-on, a groan leaving his throat as he pressed rough kisses all over your chest, his hands still playing with your nipples.

You quickly brought your hand to his hair, pulling him into another kiss; this time a much rougher kiss. It was extremely messy and needy, his fingers digging into the skin of your sides as he desperately dragged your lower body against this crotch; desperate for any type of friction. ‘’Can I suck you off?’’ You mumbled into the kiss, causing Jake to pull away.

Now, normally Jake would’ve screamed yes. Getting head was on top of his list, all his friends talked about receiving head like it was the best thing ever; even better than actually fucking. But right there and then, Jake wanted nothing more than to feel you around him, causing him to shake his head. 

‘’I want to fuck you Y/N,’’ He breathed, still lightly guiding your lower body back and forth. ‘’Please?’’ He let out, his eyes meeting yours. You only replied by smashing your lips against his once again, pulling him down so he was now hovering above you.

You quickly undid his belt, your lips still attached; hungrily moving against one another before he pulled away; only to pull his shirt over his head, his full upper body on display. You stared at him for a moment, admiring his body before his lips met yours once again. He helped you pull his pants down completely, your hand coming in contact with the outline of his fully hard cock; a gasp leaving your lips. Jake couldn’t help but let out a groan as your hand finally wrapped around the outline of his cock, dipping his head between the space where your neck and shoulder meet.

With your hand wrapped around his cock, he realized why his friends claimed they’d never jerk off ever again. Your hand felt completely different compared to his right hand, a feeling he wanted to experience again and again; never wanting his own right hand to come near his cock ever again. 

He immediately began fiddling with the button of your pants, not wanting to wait any longer; afraid he’d cum right there and then if he didn’t get to fuck you within the next 30 seconds. Your hand left his cock, a whine almost leaving his throat as you helped him get your own pants off; one of his hands finding its way down your underwear the second your pants slid down your legs.

‘’Fuck,’’ He mumbled into the pillow as he felt the sticky fabric against his fingers, hooking one of his fingers under your underwear before slowly sliding them down your legs. He propped himself up using one of his arms, looking down at your glistening core; another groan leaving his lips. ‘’Can you please fuck me now?’’ Your whine made him look up at you, his eyes wide; filled with anticipation. 

You looked beautiful. Jake always thought you were beautiful, but seeing you laying underneath him with lust-filled eyes, you looked ten times more beautiful to him. 

He only nodded in response as he pulled his underwear down, his cock hitting his abdomen; his tip red and leaking precum, still begging for attention. ‘’Do you have condoms?’’ You asked, your eyes meeting his; realizing you probably don’t have any laying around. A small smile formed on his lips as he grabbed his pants, searching through his pockets. ‘’Of course I do, you never know when you might lose your virginity.’’ He smiled as he pulled out a condom, causing you to roll your eyes as he ripped the package open.

Jake suddenly became nervous as he lined his cock against your entrance, his eyes meeting yours once again. You wrapped your arms around his neck, giving him a small smile; noticing the worry in his eyes. ‘’Take your time, okay? Do what feels good for you,’’ You reassured him, causing Jake to nod in reply once again; rubbing his tip against your entrance, collecting your arousal.

The second Jake pushed his tip inside of you, he realized what his friends had been talking about all this time. He let out a deep breath as he felt your wet walls clench around him, burying his head in the pillow beside you once again as he tried to keep himself together. The feeling of your tight walls pulsating around him felt nothing like he had imagined, it felt so much better; way better than your hand had felt.

A small moan left your lips as he pushed his cock all the way in, grabbing onto his shoulders as you parted your lips. ‘’You’re so big,’’ You whimpered into his ear, causing Jake to let out a groan. ‘’I’m not going to last long if you keep doing that,’’ He mumbled, pressing a small kiss onto your neck.

After staying still for a minute, getting used to the feeling and collecting himself, he slowly began pulling out. Your walls dragging along his hard cock, coating him in your arousal felt like nothing he had ever experienced before; his friend's endless bragging suddenly making so much sense. He thrusted into you once again, another moan leaving your lips; causing Jake to repeat his actions.

His thrusts were awkward at first, trying to figure a pace that worked for him without him immediately being close to his release; but soon enough, he found a pace that worked for him and it certainly seemed to be working for you as well. 

‘’Fuck, Jake,’’ You moaned, throwing your head onto the pillow beside you as he kept thrusting into you, grunts leaving his lips, his lips occasionally pressing wet kisses against the skin of your shoulder. ‘’Feels so good,’’ He grunted against your skin, his thrusts becoming even harsher. ‘’You’re doing so good,’’ You whimpered, the familiar feeling of warmth building up inside of Jake’s stomach.

Your words only made Jake thrust into you harder, causing even louder moans to leave your lips as his speed increased. You could tell he was close to his release by the way his thrusts were becoming sloppier, grunts spilling from his lips. 

It didn’t come as a surprise to either you or Jake that he was already on the verge of reaching his orgasm. You didn’t even mind the fact that you probably wouldn’t get to cum, the pretty sounds leaving his lips were more than enough for you.

‘’I’m gonna cum,’’ He suddenly let out, your nails digging into the skin of his shoulders as you wrapped your legs around him. ‘’Cum for me,’’ You mumbled into his ear, a final groan leaving his lips as he spilled his seed into the condom wrapped around his cock. Loud moans left his throat as he continued sloppily thrusting into you; riding out his own orgasm.

Heavy breathing filled the room as he rolled over, collapsing next to you; sweat dripping down his forehead. You turned around, looking over at the exhausted boy beside you; pieces of hair sticking to his forehead. He looked over at you, a small smile forming on his lips. You ran your hand through his hair, pushing the pieces of hair that had fallen onto his forehead away; a small forming on your lips as well. 

‘’Did I do well?’’ He let out after a moment, still panting, not taking his eyes off you. You nodded in response, moving closer to him. ‘’You did really well.’’ You mumbled as you placed your head on his chest, feeling one of his arms wrap around your waist. ‘’I guess I’m no longer a virgin,’’ He chuckled, causing you to chuckle as well. ‘’Not even a thank you?’’ You let out, your eyes meeting his.

‘’You’re the best, thank you.’’ He smiled, a small smile forming on your lips; wrapping an arm around his torso. ‘’I’m your best friend after all.’’

‘’Maybe you can give me head next time, since you’re my best friend?’’

[sarabethsilver]

The real moral of Face-Off (the hockey game episode) is that Lorelai Gilmore has zero boundaries and used this benign situation as an opportunity to manipulate her daughter's love life. My unsolicited dissertation follows:

What the episode SHOULD be about: two teenagers have different expectations for their relationship, leading to a minor misunderstanding that could be easily solved with one conversation.

What we got instead: Lorelai playing all sides of this totally normal teen conflict until it blew up into a catastrophe that would come to define Jess and Rory's entire relationship.

The episode starts with Rory waiting around for Jess to call, because apparently "call you later" meant he was supposed to call by 9:00pm that night. Lorelai initially teases Rory about it - a quip about the Bay of Pigs, implying that BOTH Jess and Rory are bad at planning ahead. Fair! The next morning, Lorelai asks why Rory didn't just call Jess herself - great question! Rory makes a weird excuse, then shifts to comparing Jess to Dean. After telling Rory not to compare them, Lorelai goes on to compare them by calling Dean the perfect first boyfriend who spoiled Rory by calling so much. It's a fascinating distortion of the events, which was that Dean called so much that Rory felt completely suffocated. She actually hated that, remember?!

Then Lorelai starts setting imaginary rules. Jess is supposed to (1) immediately sense that Rory is upset, (2) automatically know WHY Rory is upset, and (3) apologize the SECOND she walks into the diner. Jess doesn't do that, because he's not clairvoyant and he's literally in the middle of working a shift, so Rory is apparently justified in storming out of there without a word. Lorelai then sneaks in a side convo with Jess (another thing Rory hates, by the way!). Mocking Jess for not calling and getting annoyed when he doesn't stick around to hear her lengthy diatribe about how much he sucks.

Rory sits around waiting for Jess to call, which is even stranger because they had no plans that day. And she also knows how to use a phone, so theoretically she could call herself. But Lorelai sets MORE imaginary rules. Rory is home at 6:00pm on a Saturday - something that seems totally normal for a homebody like her - but Lorelai catastrophizes it. It's SHOCKING that Rory is home, she should go out immediately! How dare Jess leave her unescorted on a Saturday evening! This, of course, gives Lorelai the opportunity to give Jess her second sarcastic lecture of the day. Because calling at 5:30pm that day would have been fine, but showing up at the house two hours later is an unforgivable crime (who is making these rules?!).

Jess then waits for Rory at the hockey game, completely unbothered by the fact she went out without him (because he actually allows her independence) and not remotely blaming her for the angry silent treatment she gave him earlier. Instead, he's trying to make amends with concert tickets - which seems like a pretty nice gesture! It's interesting that the episode distorts that into something bad. Rory keeps it a secret like they've done something wrong, and the episode ends with her all sad. While Jess is presumably thinking he's fixed the problem. Because that's a reasonable conclusion.

So in the span of 24 hours, Lorelai took this tiny misunderstanding and blamed Rory, used Dean as the standard for 'perfect' behavior, set a bunch of imaginary rules for Jess to 'break,' then switched to blaming Jess for the entire thing. It's a masterclass in manipulation. Emily Gilmore couldn't have done it any better!

I look forward to @saltygilmores take on this later! Maybe we can scream into the void together.

[lucyswinter]

༘⋆ ❅ Snow Day･:*:｡ ❆

pairing: Spencer Reid x fem!BAU!reader

summary: spencer’s coworker convinces him to skip an important meeting to play with her in the snow

genre: fluff

warnings: none!

(a/n): haven’t posted in a hot sec! even though it’s the middle of may, i was feeling cozy and decided to write a fic set in december. enjoy! (only briefly proofread)

“y/n! Hey.!” Spencer said as he turned around in his swivel chair to see a bubbly BAU agent moving quickly towards his desk. His face flushed pink, but he was sure if was just from the heating units they had been blasting in the office nonstop for the past week.

“Hey Spence!” she smiled at him as she skipped over to his desk, her skirt peppered with hearts swishing with her quick movements. Her cheeks were burning pink from the warmth of the office. She stopped for a moment to push her brunette hair behind her ears, adorned with cute earrings shaped like cats. “I know you’re going to hate me for this, but that grumpypants Hotch wanted me to let you know that there’s a meeting in the main lecture room in 20.” She informed him, an exaggerated look of disappointment on her face.

“Oh, thank you" Spencer said with a chuckle. He couldn't help but notice how cute she looked today. His eyes drifted down to her skirt that was patterned with hearts, and he felt his own skip a beat.

“Mhm!” she hummed, dropping the disappointed act and grinning at him again before turning around and skipping to the other side of the room to talk to Garcia. She had on her skirt, and a blue cardigan with snowflakes on it, since it was finally December. The first snow of the season had just arrived, and her and Garcia were plotting to sneak off and enjoy some snow time.

As she left, Spencer let out a shaky breath. He couldn't stop thinking about her and how adorable she looked in that skirt. His mind begins to wander, and visions of cat earrings and blue cardigans danced through his head.

From across the office, Spencer could hear her chattering with Garcia about how to sneak out and what they would do in the snow. As unsuspecting as they were trying to seem, they were being much too obvious about their plans.

She could feel Spencer’s gaze on her, and suddenly the warmth of the office wasn’t the only thing heating her up. She looked from side to side before waving Spencer over quietly “Spencer!” she whisper yelled “C’mere!”

Spencer look around to make sure no one was watching him, playing in to her bit, and quickly stood up, making sure to tip toe for dramatic effect. He gave up after a few paces and proceeded to walk over to y/n and Garcia

"Yes, y/n?" he asked nervously. Not that she made him nervous- well, she did. But In all honesty he was more scared of what her and Garcia had cooked up.

“Okay so” she looked over to Garcia and giggled “We were thinking-“

“Who is we? You’re on your own for this one, sweetheart.” Penelope laughed, and y/n rolled her eyes.

“Anyways… I was thinking of ditching Hotch’s meeting to go enjoy the snow…want to join us? I mean…me?”

Spencer's heart rate sped up at the thought of being alone with her in the snow. He couldn't believe his luck.

"Oh um, sure. I’d love to join you" He said, trying his hardest to keep his voice from cracking.

Her face lit up at his response. “Great! We just need to make sure no one suspects us… everyone else would totally rat us out…” she told him, suspiciously eyeing Morgan, knowing he of all people would not find their antics amusing.

"I, uh, I may have a few ideas," Spencer said, his mind racing. He glanced around the office, considering his options. "What if” he paused for dramatic effect. “Instead of skipping the meeting, we...”

He was cut off by a giggle and a shush “Nope! I will not be talked out of this” she grinned “The is revenge for Hotch being such a frump and making us stay later on a snowy day!”

Spencer couldn't help but chuckle at her stubbornness. He found her confidence viciously attractive. He let out a small sigh, because he knew there was no point in arguing with her when she got like this.

“Alright, alright," he said, giving in. He was met with an eardrum shattering squeal and two hands grabbing his, connected to a body now jumping with joy. He smiled. “Let's go enjoy the snow."

She detached her hands from his to clap and let out another squeal.

“Okay, so, we both have to go out at different times. I’ll go first, then you. Okay Spence?” He nodded, giving her an awkward thumbs up. She grinned as she looked around once more.

“Alright.., see you out there” she saluted him, before getting up and not-so-nonchalantly walking out of the office and into the hallway. You could hear her pennyloafers clacking down the stairs until she finally reached the door and ran outside.

Spencer watched her leave, the smile not leaving his face. He glanced around the office, making eye contact with Morgan. He panicked and left the office, following quickly behind.

As he walked out the front doors of their building and onto the city streets, he saw her run out onto the snowy sidewalk and dance around in the rain of falling snowflakes. She had no jacket, so the small lumps of ice just collected on her hair and cardigan.

“Hey Spence, I caught one on my tongue!” She laughed as she twirled around.

He stepped forward out into the snow, his breath forming small clouds in front of him. He couldn't help but smile as he watched her dance in the snowflakes. He quickly took off his jacket and draped it around her shoulders before joining her on the sidewalk.

“No! I don’t need that. I’ll be fine. A little snow never hurt anybody!“ She told him. He sighed again at her stubbornness.

“No, really! I insist. You’re going to freeze to death out here! Actually, I was reading this interesting statistic about how last year, nearly 26% of all frostbite contracted was severe-“

“You look cute, yknow? When you geek out, or whatever.” She paused, cocking her head and making an confusing face, one which Spencer did not understand. After a while, she spoke again. “What’s your IQ?”

“187”

“Woah”

“What’s yours?”

“104…I think.”

They both stood there silently for a moment, the sound of cars beeping and sloshing in the sludge filled the air. This time, Spencer broke the silence.

“You called me cute.”

“Are you accusing me?”

“No just…just pointing it out-“

“Well, it’s true.”

She smiled softly at him. Her pennyloafers left shoe-shaped prints in the thin layer of snow that covered the sidewalk. She took a few steps forward, almost an arms length away from Spencer.

“We should go inside”

“Yeah”

They both stood there for a moment, looking at each other and enjoying the peacefulness of the snowfall. The tranquil sounds of the city had just faded into white noise. She waited a few more moments before she walked a bit closer to him, close enough to touch. She looked down and touched his pinky to hers. He shivered, but smiled and gave her a small nod when she looked up at him. She gave him a wide grin, complete with chattering teeth, and hesitantly laced her hand into his. He jumped at the feeling.

“Gosh your hands are cold.”

“We’re out in the snow, what did you expect.”

He just shook his head and chuckled, but his hand remained locked with hers.

“How about we head back inside. Before anyone notices us gone.”

She nodded in response, swinging their interlocked hands together for a few seconds before leading the him towards the front doors of the office.

(a/n): thanks for reading! ❄️🌨☃️

[sphireath-wisp]

#just for me.

Sypnosis: Things that remind you of them that they keep for themselves (O.P. version)

Warnings: Messy interchanging tenses, not proofread

Featuring: Monkey D. Luffy, Roronoa Zoro, Vinsmoke Sanji x GN! reader

Monkey D. Luffy

I feel like this guy is always covered in bandages. I just feel it. With the amount of trouble he literally leaps himself into, he is almost always covered in injuries 24/7. Chopper would always nag him and chide how reckless his captain can be. It's always 50/50 with Luffy. It's either he totally forgets that the bandages are there or peels them off whenever he has the chance. "The bandages feel so itchy, they always get in the way whenever I fight!" or so Luffy would whine. You know how much of a hassle it can be to keep bandaging him up to Chopper because he'll almost immediately rip them off - not to mention the waste of Chopper's already limited bandage supply on the sea. If your lover wants to act like a kid, you'll treat him like one. You scribble on drawings of you and him and even let him help decorate. Whenever you bandage him up, he doesn't rip them off because he genuinely likes the doodles on them. Though, he's gotten attached... too attached. His wounds should have already healed by now, but he continues to wear them with pride.

"The king of pirates should look like one." Something Luffy firmly believes in. He loves to collect anything Pirate-related. Gold and jewels don't fascinate him as much as that pirate hat or golden hook. Luffy will hoard everything he feels like the king of pirates would or should have. He doesn't care about fame, power, or money - but he wants to feel that rush of adrenaline pumping through his veins, that hunger for the next adventure that makes his heart race, and that wave of joy and relief once he wins a battle. You know how much he loved such an idea, so you couldn't help but buy him a gold necklace, with a miniature fake skull in the middle. You'll watch as he fidgets around with it or shows it off to the crew, beaming with pride. It's like his treasured straw hat, it's almost always on him.

Roronoa Zoro

Zoro likes to wear Bandanas. He doesn't wear them often, but he does like to wear that black bandana he keeps around. You've noticed how dirty and torn up it's gotten, and it would look more like a spider web on Zoro's head rather than a bandana if he wore this. You recently bought a red bandana for Zoro and Chopper picked out a pink one for him, just for shits and giggles. He appreciates the thought you put behind it and you'll notice both of the bandanas tied around his upper right arm. He's started to use his left arm to fight more other than his right, it's almost as if he doesn't want the bandanas to get scraped up in battle. Of course, when there's an actual capable opponent facing him, he will fight will all three of his swords.

You often place bentos next to his swords, insisting that you were just helping Sanji give the bentos out. Being so focused on his training, he almost never properly takes care of himself (like taking showers). His main source of energy is always sake, but there's no way that's good for him. Sanji will help you make bentos for the whole crew, but you feel like he knows it's an excuse to sneak in reminders for Zoro to take care of himself in his bento. Zoro feels like these notes are too precious to throw away, so he has this noticeboard in the crow's nest to stick up all of your notes. Often when you walk in to check up on him, you'll catch him staring at the board of sticky notes signed by you.

Sanji

He probably has a whole collection of knives that he uses to prepare food for the crew, but I feel like a lot of them have already become dull. Obviously, Sanji could just sharpen them again without much time or effort. However, you've heard him grumbling under his breath about being unable to cut up tough parts of meat. You can still remember the struggle he went through to cut open a coconut with his knife. Being the sweetheart that you are, you gave him a whole new knife set for him to use to his heart's extent. He loved much happier while cooking. While he was always focused while cooking, he almost seemed... satisfied to cook with a gift from you. "A kitchen knife is the soul of the cook and my darling, you are the love of my soul and the key to my heart."

I just know this guy keeps a camera around, snapping photos of you from the best angles ever. It's like... when did you get so pretty??? He always keeps at least one in his wallet and because of that, whenever he pulls his wallet out to pay for something in a store, he has to fight that overwhelming urge to buy something for you. He loves to treat you in the best way possible. You are royalty, you are the sun, you are life. You make him the happiest and he could be when you're around. If you wanted to buy out the whole store, there wouldn't be a single second of hesitation before he's emptying his wallet for you.

[sol-consort]

Omg, I don't know if you remember, but that shepard cam girl/streamer au you did, I absolutely loved it!! I loved Shepard being so nonchalant about being tits-out in front of the crew, also them passing around the video and being embarrassed about making eye contact with Shep. You killed me!! That was so good

Oh god, this one? I wrote it while half asleep, didn't expect anyone to read it. I just checked it over again–damn the amount of typos. I fixed as much as I could rn. Hopefully, it reads smoother.

But yes! I still adore the concept and would love to expand upon it.

The army life + staying on a ship in the middle of the galaxy and sharing space with your crew has got to result in a lot of accidental nudity and flashing situations. Someone new on warships–like Tali or Liara might find it surprising, feel a bit more shy, while someone like Shepard, who was the Normandy second in command during Captian Anderson days got used to it by now.

Or maybe it's a human army thing? Quarians can't strip for first aid because it will only worsen the situation, Krogans have their thick skin and shells, and Turian skin has metal outer plating.

Only humans are this squishy, easily injured, easy to tear into. Mix that with the fact that we have a pretty good immunity system that gives us high tolerance to different microbiomes and the most genetically diverse genes in the Mass Effect canon–Mordin mentions it in ME2—it's not hard to understand why a human soldier would nonchalantly strip on an alien planet, in the middle of the battlefield, just to ensure the wound is treated properly.

But it's still hot—Shepard's total disregard to having your tits out on full display, chest heaving with every breath. Your crew desperately trying to maintain eye contact and not get distracted by the way your bare tits bounce with every powerful command and order you bark at them.

Biotics grant people healing abilities, at least ingame. It's not strange for someone like Kaidan or Liara to act as an emergency medic while on the battlefield.

Kaidan attempts to stay professional, stuttering more than usual as the raspiness in his voice becomes more apparent courtesy of his dry throat.

The tips of his ears reddish, summoning all of his will to keep his finger study as he pressed against your wound with the disinfected pad. Having to lower himself into your naked form, his clothed chest almost fully pressing against your own. The hiss you let out as your nipples touch the cold metal surface of his armour—it almost makes his heart jump out from his ribcage–barely remaining collected by the end of it.

Sneaking one lustful glance at your still exposed chest on the shuffle ride back to the Normandy before forcing himself to look away, feeling ashamed of his actions, excusing himself to his own sleeping pod the second the crew is back on board.

-

Anyway, so streamer Shepard hmm.

Miranda would quickly catch wind of this open secret and become your number one patron under a fake pseudo name. She keeps toning in each stream, even if she's working, simply setting the tablet on the table while she files the papers away. Dropping big stacks occasionally whenever you do something she likes, using the carrot method to subtly get you to act more and more slutty, exactly how she likes it.

Samara convinced herself that as long as she only watches—no touching herself, no writing a comment, no sending any money–then it's basically okay and doesn't break her code. She does, however, pay attention to your frequent commenters, checking their profiles, tracking their other socials... just in case one of them crosses the line. It is her job to make this world a safer place for everyone, right?

Thane–oh god, poor Thane. His own Siha...? Humans sure are uh... more adventurous than he thought they were. Drells are moved by emotions and romantic feelings more than sexual ones. He has very little interest in pornagrophy in any form of media because he just can't get off to a stranger, someone he doesn't love. But once he discovers that it is you in those videos, his commander Shepard, his siha. A flood of emotions wash over him. It becomes a boderline addiction.

Thane especially knows about the common human prono trope of fucking a drell because of the skin acting as both a stim and an aphrodisiac. He wonders if you'd be open to...having him on the stream for that? Just to boost your views...no other reason :) Definitely not to sate some deep primal instinct within him, the need to state his claim by fucking you in front of all of your adoring fans, he is such a tender gentle soul, he would never have those possessive thoughts, right?....right?

The poor guy almost voices this suggestion out each time you come over for a little chat.

Jack would be your top commenter, not even under a fake profile or a different name. Straight up Jack with her own profile picture to boost. Spewing filth and ordering you around like her own personal whore. Of course you don't pay her any mind and only oblige her requests after you make her beg.

Garrus wants to join you so badly. Picture this, the first ever human/turian streamers ever since the war! It will be a hit with both planets. Your profile will skyrocket in popularity. Especially if this is in ME1 where the human-turian intergalactic relationship was still strained and tense. Meditate the tension between your civilisations by letting him stuff you full with his gaint blue glowing cock <3 huh huh!? A million credit worth idea right?

[fallout4-reacts]

How would the companions react to walking in on Sole nude (not in like a sexual way, but like, got a wound on their thigh during a fight and was in the middle of stitching it up in their room with the door closed or something like that)

That raider was ruthless, sneaking around Sole and opening them up like a fish with their bloody, rusted knife. Sole made it through and made it to Sanctuary owing to the stimpacks, but now they has to assess the extent of their injuries and heal themself. Sole totally removed their garments as the enemy drove his blade directly into their ribcage and managed to slide down to the thigh, shocked by the length of the cut. Then they hear footsteps in the corridor...

Cait��: She casts a quick glance at Sole before crossing her arms and leans against the doorframe.

"Not bad, I had one like that before. Ya can come back after you're done patching and tell that fool Preston that I'm not going to take care of his stupid tatos. He wants a planter, but I'm too busy with my bat knocking the heads off the raiders trying to take us from behind."

Sole remains stuck for several seconds before regaining the capacity to speak.

"Can you get out of here now?" they ask, their face expressionless.

"What? Are you going to say you're shy? You don't have to; you're hiding a lovely body beneath your armor."

"OUT!"

Codsworth : (OK, not exactly speaking steps) In a nervose movement, his mechanical arms rotate two or three times on themselves. He tries to keep his cool by moving his three eyes in unison towards the corridor.

"Please excuse my untimely disruption, Mum/Sir; I came to inform you that supper will be served tonight in the common room. All of your companions will be present, but if you want, I may arrange a meal for you in your extremely quiet dining room. I understand if you don't feel compelled to... socialize."

Sole smiles at their butler, but he doesn't look at them.

"That's OK, Cods, eh... When... I'm finished, I'll join you in the lounge to discuss this further."

"Definitely!"

And the robot bolted from the room.

Curie : She runs over to inspect the huge wound.

"Oh no! What occurred? How come you didn't provide proper care?"

"That's exactly what I was about to do."

"This lesion requires disinfection and suturing! Just wait for me; I'll collect my equipment!"

Sole would have liked to object, or at the very least inform Curie that it is not appropriate to enter people's bedrooms without their permission because they may be... naked... but the Synth has already gone. Sole, with a pout, casts a glance at... their own health kit.

Danse : If embarrassment could kill him, he would have died right there. His face is absolutely bloodless. Not that he hasn't seen other naked soldiers; intimacy is a very meaningless concept in the field. But Sole, in this situation. He feels as if he has crossed an unbearable line and committed an awful act. He swiftly turns around and makes a motion to exit, but his brain records the second piece of information.

"You are severely injured!"

"It's mostly superficial, but it is."

"Need…help?"

"No, I'm doing just fine on my own."

"Perfect!"

And he's back in the hallway as swiftly as he came. Sole will have to wait until the paladin explains why he came to see them in the first place.

Deacon : (glitch power) As soon as his eyes are drawn to Sole's nude body, a huge wicked smile grows on his lips, and before his friend is able to react, he is in his underwear. Sole is taken aback and takes some time to comprehend what the spy is saying.

"Is this some sort of nudist gathering? Or is this an Adam and Eve celebration?"

"This is MY room, and I am HURT!"

"Oh, yes!"

Deacon is clothed again before Sole can say anything else. The unfortunate vault dweller is fully swept away this time.

"So, let me look at this wound— 

"No, get out!"

"Alright, alright. Whatever you desire! But if you ever feel like the planet is spinning much faster than it should, give me a call and I'll be there."

And now he's gone. Sole winks, unsure whether the scene was real or if they have hallucinating.

Dogmeat : He lies on the bed with his head resting on his legs, waiting for Sole to finish.

Elder Maxson : He enters and exits the room. It was a single continuous motion. With no change in expression. When Sole is finished, they dress and proceed to the living room, where they find the Elder in a pretty stiff position. The Elder, on the other hand, constantly stands straight.

"You're done, Knight. I needed the report on supermutant activity near Satellite Station Olivia immediately. Did you finish cleaning everything?"

"Not a single mutant left alive, sir."

"Perfect, perfect, perfect. I'm returning to the Prydwen in order to dispatch the soldiers to retrieve any sensitive data that may be left. I intend you get there as quickly as possible."

"Yes, sir."

"And, Knight..."

"Yes, sir?"

"Please never bring up this unfortunate incident again."

"The satellite station's super mutants?"

"You are fully aware of what I mean. Dismiss."

"This is my living room, sir."

"Perfect, perfect, perfect. Have a nice day."

He walks out of the home, and we can hear the motor of a vertibird in the distance. Sole then allows themselves to burst out laughing.

Hancock : His smile becomes so large that he appears to have much less flesh on his face. Sole's expression is devastation.

"Wow, this is my kind of job!"

"I am hurt!"

"Yes, I see. That's too bad. Need a hand?"

"Definitely not!"

"Well, I'll meet you in the lounge."

Hancock walks back. Sole takes comfort in the fact that, despite his debauchery, Hancock never crosses the line, demonstrating some semblance of... respect...

Gage : He enters the room and doesn't seem to be bothered in the least. He begins casually declaring the report of Nuka-World's behaviours.

"Porter! I’m naked!" 

"I saw. But as I was saying about Nisha’s operations— 

"I’m naked and I want you to go out immediately."

"All right, Boss."

Sole is still taken aback by the raider's dashing demeanour. But, well, Gage has undoubtedly seen some green ones in his life, and it does make him any more impressed by anything.

MacCready : His expression is stern, as though it were Sole's fault. Sole, for their part, is frozen in place. MacCready makes a hand gesture with a scowl on his face.

"When you're finished—whatever you do—I need your support to recover—

"Get out!"

"Okay, I'll wait in the living room."

When Sole has finished, they proceed to the living room with the intent of reprimanding the mercenary, but he sits quietly on the couch with a broad smile.

"Aside from that, it was a pretty spectacular view. Not too bad, you know?"

The vault dweller pauses before turning to return to their room. Before they rip their friend's head off, they need to scream into their pillow.

Nick Valentine : The tin can has a swirl function. Sole notices this because as soon as they realise Nick is in the doorframe, they can only see his back.

"God! Pardon! I… I didn’t think. I should have known better. I saw you come in and I wanted to... It's unforgivable, God. Pardon."

"It's fine, Nick, and given how many times you've patched me, it's not like you haven't seen these parts of my body before. It's just that you have the big picture right now."

It makes Nick feel even more uncomfortable. Even though they are over two metres apart, Sole can clearly hear Nick's fans react by kicking in all at the same time. They can't help but chuckle at the scenario, but they have too much respect for the detective to make fun of him.

Piper : A reaction halfway between Danse and Nick."Wow, Blue!" she exclaimed in turning heels. "Sorry! I’ll uh," she’s cut off by her nervous laugh, "waiting for you in the living room. Yeah, I’ll just wait for you in the living room. There. Do you have nuka cola in your fridge?"

Preston : He already possesses the grace and stature of a marble statue. He now has the stiffliness. He's not even blinking. He was about to say something, but nothing came out of his mouth. Not even breath, by the way. Sole thinks they could castigate him, but the Colonel's state of stupor is heartbreaking. They stoop, take up their coat, and drape themselves in it. When they speak, they try to employ as calm a tone as possible.

"You wanted to see me, Preston?"

"See... you? NO! Well, uh... you mean like in the expression? Okay, as stated in the expression. Okay. Yes, I was hoping to see you. But not you! I mean, I saw you, I couldn't deny it. I saw you! It’s awful! No! I mean, you're not awful! I regret! I'm truly sorry! I should have made a signal or knocked on the door— 

"Breathe!"

Sole crosses their arms, unsure whether to laughs or be annoyed by this situation. It's the first time they've seen the man in such a nervous state. They decide to take a humoros approach.

"I don't even have a door to knock on. It's all right, Preston; I understand your discomfort and that you don't mean anything."

"Of course not! I am forever thankful to you for understanding me. I mean, to grasp the situation as it is. I'll be in the living room, waiting for you."

"Does a settlement need my help?"

"Yes!" 

"My pip-boy is sitting on the table. Put it on the map, and I'll get there as soon as I can."

"Thank you!"

The man exits the room without further questioning. Sole locates the small community on their map, but they don't see their Colonel again for the rest of the day.

As if he was trying to avoid them...

Strong : The super-mutant frown.

“Puny human should wear armor.”

“Puny human is in their ROOM and you GO OUT!”

“Puny human stupid. Puny human should never let their guard down.”

“GET OUT!”

“Strong get out, but Strong wants to know when human and Strong are going to get the Milk of Human Kindness.”

“GET OUT!”

X6-88 : Hands behind back, straight, and unimpressed.

"Ma'am/Sir, it is not appropriate to deal with such an injury without the expertise of the Institute's doctors."

"X6? Could you just leave my room right away?"

The Courser executes, but only for a few steps in the hallway.

"I reiterate my recommendation that you be taken in to one of the Institute's physicians for a professional body examination."

"Get the fuck away!"

"There is no need to get carried away and use vernacular. Unlike the way you handled the damage you caused yourself on your last assignment, my advice are perfectly adequate."

"I'm perfectly capable of handling the damage I've done to myself, and if you don't want me to do any damage to you, I recommend you take the Sanctuary Grand Tour right now!"

X6 obeys without fully comprehending why the future director places themselves in such a state.