#( i hope this is okay ? if not let me know & ill rewrite it =) )

[muchmossymess]

Loser, Bambi

A radiostar/radioapple/duckiedeer rewrite of loser, baby (as an aroace myself, this is platonic, I think it'd be hilarious to their dynamic) (set after the finale, and let my delusional heart believe alastor cares deep deep deep down)

Lucifer: So things look bad and your back's against the wall

Your whole existence hangs in the balance

You're feeling panicked like you heard the hunter's call

Can't face the world without you malice

You've lost your way, your reputations wrecked

Well me just say, (scoffing) what'd you expect?

Alastor: Excuse me?

Lucifer: You're a loser, bambi

A loser goddamn baby 

You're a fucked up little whiny bitch

Alastor: Now listen here

Lucifer: You're a loser, unlike me

Alastor: What a surprise

Lucifer: You've amused hell's ruler 

If only your shtick was newer 

You're an overlord gone overboard

But you've got company

Alastor: *staticy boo track*

Lucifer: There was a time I thought no one could relate

To the holy things that I cant let go

But lettin' walls down, it can sometimes set you straight!

Can't let the hotels progress plateau 

Alastor: I must admit, that I seem to've grown to care

Lucifer: You aren't the only one with his soul bare

Get outta here man 

We're both losers, bambi

We're losers, it's okay to be a-

Alastor: Psychopathic radio?

Lucifer (out of tune with the song): eeughhhhh…

Alastor: *snickers*

Alastor: I'm a loser deary

To admit it is quite dreary 

But at least I know I'm not alone

Lucifer: You're a loser

Both: Just like me

*tune change*

Lucifer: I've got a habit of creation

Alastor: I've got a knack for devastation, of every lowly sinner I can find

Lucifer: You know what Charlie thinks of that, come on

Alastor: I helped fulfil all of her dreaming

Lucifer: I'm making sure I'm never leaving 

Now that I'm back in her life

Both: I will protect her from all ill meaning

Alastor: You're a loser, Luci

Lucifer: A loser, but just maybe if we

Both: Eat shit together, things will end up differently

Lucifer: It's time to lose some of that loathin'

Lower your mask, let hope in, bambi

Play your card, be who you are

Both: A loser, just like-

Charlie: There they are! They're fucking singing???

[o-pandora-o]

May I request headcanons for WHB Belphegor, Bimet, Astaroth, Ronove & Bael with shy gn s/o please?

Belphegor, Bimet, Astaroth, Ronove & Bael with shy gender-neutral s/o

a/n: I think I did my best here? On Ronove's part his chat says 'pretty' so I used that too. Tell me if I did something wrong and I'll rewrite it. Thank you so much again for requesting!~

Belphegor

🌙Too tired to even go out so PDA is not even an option. He also thinks PDA is too troublesome and just rather sleep than go out.

"Mmmm" Belphegor rubs his eyes and saw you getting ready to go outside. "Mmm where you goin?" He groggily asks "To the movies, do you wanna come?" You asked, hoping he'd come with you "Sure but I'm sure I'd fall asleep while watching it..." he fell asleep again, which made you smile, and covered him with a blanket.

🌙There are two places he'd like to sleep on, Beleth's bed and your lap. He's kinda like a cat, once he decides your lap is his pillow, it's all his. If gets the chance he will use it, no matter if its public or private. He won't care if you're shy enough to let him sleep, he sleeps where he wanna sleeps.

Belphie wakes up groggily, looking for you or Beleth. You were looking at the garden from the terrace when you saw him approaching you. "Hey... How's sleep?" "Good but...not good enough" he somehow looks at you with tired eyes, he was somehow looking at your thighs. He lied down the floor and used your lap as his pillow. "Belphie? What are you doing?!" "Mmm it looked soft...lemme sleep here" he slept for God knows how long, you desperately pleaded to Beleth to lift him up and place him back to the bed, because your legs are too numb. This cycle always repeats.

🌙He thinks being shy is a bit troublesome, he'd rather say something blunt rather than keep it (his own preference). However he thinks you're too cute whenever you're shy.

In one rare time he's awake to have a proper date with you, both of you went on a newly opened restaurant in Nilfheim. "Ill take whatever..." Belphegor yawns. Are you sure? Hmm... Okay one Devil carbonara and one 666 Devil steak" you ordered. "Good choice... I'll take the Devil Carbonara..." Belphie yawns again "Are you sure it's okay to have an outside date?... You look so tired" you were worried for Belphie who seemed to be almost headbanging due to drowsiness. "Yeah...we barely go out because I'm too tired. Can't be always me who wins, no?" The waiter served the order and it seemed that your order turned into an angel salad. "Hm..." You were hesitating to tell the waiter your order was wrong until Belphegor spoke up. "You got their order wrong, she ordered the 666 Devil Steak" he yawns again "Oh! I apologize, coming right up!" The waiter leaves in a hurry with the salad. "How'd you know?" you asked "Mmm well being with you, I realized how you don't call out other people's mistakes. Mmm it's troublesome for me, because I'll have unspoken feelings I'd regret. Don't worry about it" he said, as he yawns and took a nap beside his food.

🌙Headpats, all the time. He likes patting your head whenever you feel flustered because of him.

🌙Likes it if you're comfortable with him as he is with you. He'd enjoy it if you only talk to him (like ranting, venting, casually talking etc) while his head is on your lap. He thinks your voice is a lullaby, it feels serene enough to make him fall asleep, so please talk to him while his head is in your lap.

"Hey. How was your day?" One rare day, Belphegor is awake heading towards you and lie on the floor, head in your lap. You blush but you answer his question. "It was so tiring... Harumon spilled tea on me and I tripped on the debris while helping Beleth scavage" you run up your hand on his hair "Mmm and what else happened?" you can see Belphie become drowsy because of your touch. "Oh and Bathin came and brought souvenirs! But he tripped on Harumon and fell... Gusion also came but he looked so horny because he was computing something about palace expenses...quite weird bu- oh." When you looked down, he was sleeping. After a few moments "Why'd you stop talking?" Belphie woke up like he was never asleep. "You were sleeping..." "It's okay, keep talking, I like hearing your voice when I sleep mmm" he sleeps again in your lap and you blush.

🌙He forgets to say it or somehow hides it to not make you too shy or flustered, but he appreciates it whenever you're giving your best, such as getting out of your comfort zone, for him.

"Where are you going?" He asked as he woke up from his long nap. "I'm gonna pass my portfolio on an animation project... Studio PB is looking for animators and... I wanna try..." you meekly said "But I thought you didn't wanna pursue that?" Belphie looks at you, lazily, without judgement. "Yes but... I thought about going for it after you encouraged me to not be scared and to not think what other people say..." you rubbed the back of your neck "Yeah, mmm good boy/girl. Goodluck okay?" He kissed your forehead and pat your head. He then went back to Beleth's bed to sleep while having a smile on his face. You were dumbfounded because of the sudden forehead kiss and blushed while leaving the palace.

🌙Will slap your ass in a rare blue moon when he's awake and feeling naughty. By the time you'd react, he'd probably fall asleep.

You yelp as you feel Belphegor's familiar large hands slapping your rear. When you turn around you see none, but when you look to the floor, you see a Belphegor sleeping.

Bimet

💰Mans doesn't care if you're shy, if you got money he'd do whatever you say. No PDA? Done. Wanna hold his hand? Done. Mans flexible than Astaroth's snake, again, as long as he gain money from you.

💰However, his personal preference is to display public affection. But again, since you're like his bank, he'd acknowledge your preferences more than his.

Both of you were looking at the couple ahead of you, the guy's hand was on the girl's waist. You somehow looked at Bimet but blushed and looked away. Bimet noticed how you kept looking at them, then him, then blushing while looking away. "You know you could've asked, right?" Bimet stared at you blankly. "I... I'm too shy to. Idk... I may look like a bit needy, don't I?" you blushed and looked down. Bimet held your waist and pulled you closer to him "Let this be free of charge, for once" he whispered on your ear, and you blushed even more.

💰To be honest, he thought of you as his moneybag, he is a straightforward gold digger. But through time he thought that you were cute when shy and decided to stay and in turn, use SOME of his money for you.

Bimet was looking afar from Mammon's palace, while you were in the palace koi pond, having a peace of mind. In that rare instance he noticed himself reminiscing, he only treated you nicely because of your money. Because somehow you attracted good fortune like a lucky cat. But somehow he felt a sense of responsibility, he wanted to protect you at all cost. He was greedy for money, but he was also greedy for your affection. What a fitting man for Mammon's right hand. When he realized it, he noticed himself going down the castle, and ask if you wanna eat lunch at some restaurant he had a VIP membership on (because he is the right hand of Mammon).

💰You know how Belphie and Satan will talk to the waiter if they got your order wrong? Well this guy will tear somebody up if they got your order wrong.

"Oi. You. Waiter." Bimet glares at the waiter after the gave your food. "Bimet no it's -" He glares at you. You look at your lap, and blush, getting ready for the impact the waiter was about to face. "Yes how may I serve you?" The waiter comes, sensing the tension and a bit afraid. "I wonder how your boss would feel if his Majesty Mammon suddenly bought this establishment and firing you" Bimet smiles deadly. "S-sir" the demon was shivering "Um.. there might be a mix up on the order..." you meekly said, saving the waiter from his jobless future. "Oh? Oh! I see! Thank you so much ma'am/sir. I-im so sorry please! Ill bring in some complementary dessert too... I apologize again please don't fire me...!" He hurriedly goes back to the kitchen. "You shouldn't really be nice to him. Hmph. I could've thought him a lesson!" He pouts. "It's okay thank you..."

💰He's a scammer, but he's YOUR scammer. He doesn't want you to be scammed by anyone but him. That's how greedy he is.

Both of you were roaming in the streets of Abyssos because you wanted to buy from the ice cream shop that was popular for it's exquisite flavors. "Oh there's the shop. I'll go buy for you, you wait here okay?" Bimet calmly speaks to you, while having sparkly eyes, that was your cue to give him money. You gave him cash "I'll have the change, yes? Thanks." He fled to buy ice cream. Bimet left you in a bench that was near an alleyway. A shady woman came up to you selling some sex toys. You politely decline but she was persistent, saying she had no sales for the day and was giving you puppy eyes. "Oi. They said no. Back off." Bimet came back, glaring at them, controlling their grip to not break the ice cream he's holding. The demon backed off, not wanting to be in trouble. "Thats right. I'm their scammer, only THEIRS." he hugged you while holding the ice cream. You blushed and he held his hand. You held back his hand and he glared. "No, I meant payment for shooing that demon" Bimet smirks, you facepalmed.

Astaroth

🐍Doesn't do PDA but is a dirty talker. He loves to try and 'corrupt' (make you shy) both in public and private.

"Beings like you are very interesting" Astaroth looks at you "What do you mean?" You look at him back "You deny the pleasures of temptation, you aren't honest with yourselves" he looks at you and comes close, face in your ear "Hmm like this one over here." He whispers huskily. "Previously you were eyeing those harness, were you not? I bet it looks good on you while in bed" he added "I- Astaroth!" You blushed and he just smiled like nothing happened.

🐍Loves corrupting people and beings, especially YOU. He always makes sure and try to 'corrupt' you so that you won't leave him.

"Astaroth I need to go to work, do you want me to bring you food later?" you were putting your foot in your shoe while Astaroth's snake took your other shoe. "Humans work. Why must they work? It would be better if you're with me and cuddle no?" Astaroth got your shoe while smiling at you. "Y-you're doing this again! Last time you did this it ended up me taking my sick leave and we were in the bed!!" You blushed "I succeeded to corrupt you back then and I want to do that again. Your helpless expression in your face was satisfactor-" you covered his mouth and got your shoe. "Shh!! N-not today! M-maybe tonight..." You said, blushing.

🐍Gets kind of insecure when you get 'corrupted' by others, especially how hard it was for him to.

It was your day off and Paimon barged into your house. He was tempting you to go on shopping with him. Before Astaroth could do or say anything, Paimon dragged you out and he was pissed off. When you came back with a lot of shopping bags..."How come it's that easy for others to corrupt you while it took me ages for you to stay in bed with me on a weekday?" he was more sharp-tongued than usual, means he's pissed more to Paimon than you. "I... I'm sorry... He dragged me and...well I got you some clothes and some snake food...." You scratched your head and blushed a bit. "Alright but next time I get to corrupt you" "Okay you need to stop hanging out with Sitri, okay?" You replied but his snake hissed instead.

🐍 ENJOYS your stories and rants. He is happy if you feel comfortable enough to tell him everything, even your day. No matter how boring or how chaotic your day was. Plus he has a narratophilia kink.

"How was your day?" Astaroth greets you as you remove your outside clothes. "Hmmm it was pretty chaotic, Sitri asked my opinion on the palace decor such as paintings, vases, only for it to be crushed by his majesty's Satan and his motorcycle...." You sighed as you remove your socks. "Is that so? Ah to be crushed by his Majesty Satan" he imagines and blushed "N-no! Don't blush!! It was bad! When his majesty crushed the decor, Sitri was mad because apparently the decor had the audacity to be crushed by his majesty! And proceeded to wreck the debris..." you were so tired and changed into your house clothes. Astaroth was still blushing because he was imagining it. "H-hey stop!!" You blushed, it seems like you won't have any rest tonight, huh?

Ronove

🗡️Likes PDA, but prevents himself to. He thinks he might become nuts if he had gain too much physical contact with you.

You look at him and ask him if he's uncomfortable with physical affection, let alone in public. "No. However you're so pretty I might do something to you outside that may make you embarrassed or too shy to go outside for the next few weeks." He smiles and licked his lips. "W-what?!!" you blushed.

🗡️ If he feels like he can control himself, he'd hold your hand instead. Since he thinks hands are the most beautiful body part.

🗡️ When you're feeling insecure, he likes to remind you that he like beautiful and pretty things. So he'd explain how cute and pretty you are (applicable to all genders).

He noticed you were looking through a Devil's magazine, with male and female models. You somehow appear too focused and sad. He kept hearing you sigh and shaking your head. "Hey. Why is my pretty girl/boy sad?" He pats your head. "It's nothing..." You looked away. "You're not gonna be pretty if you frown a lot and sigh." It was visible in his eyes that he's worried. "Well I'm not pretty or beautiful or handsome, whatever so what's the point?" You snapped at him. "Who said that?" "No one... Look at these demons! They're the perfect definition of pretty!" you pointed at the models in the magazine. "They aren't as pretty as you" He made a blank stare as he bluntly tells you. "What?..." You looked at him with wide eyes and slightly blushed "They aren't as pretty as you. I mean look! This guy has a good body so I wanna cut it and display it. While this one had good hands! While the other one his toenail is-" "Wha?!" "While you're pretty enough that I don't want to cut you. You're pretty as a whole." He pats your head.

🗡️Asmodeus gave you permission to put a gag (the one he gave) on him when you think he gets a bit overboard with the compliments, like enough to make you red like a tomato.

"You're pretty. Very pretty today especially with that top that looks good on your body. Yes beautiful yes. And your hands and nails, very clean, like no other. Your legs! Your pants accentuate your legs I'd like to get crushed by it and-" Ronove kept on rambling and you just put a gag on his mouth. "Sorry.... We're going on a busy street and I don't want them to hear you complimenting me...." You blush as he protested.

🗡️Gets horny after seeing cut up angels and instead talks dirty to you.

Both of you were roaming the streets as you see cut up bodies of angels. The bodies were fresh and reeks of blood. When you turn around, Ronove was inspecting the bodies. " Yes. Yes! Pretty bodies.... Hands...Nails... Wings!!" Ronove was practically drooling and was aroused. He was looking left and right for bodies and saw you. "H-hey I was wondering if we can do it right now.." You blushed, you know what he was talking about. "Oh hell no please! What if people see?!" You were blushing so much "Then let me tell you how much I wanna ravage you here and-" You put the gag back on him.

Bael

👑Too busy for PDA, which favors you because you won't get shy or overwhelmed around too many people greeting the both of you here and there.

"Hey" you greeted Bael early in the morning. But he was too busy to notice you. "Bael?" you tapped on his shoulder "Oh! Sorry I didn't hear you. This stupid king of mine went on a shopping spree again! Like imagine! I just went to sleep and look at all the receipts!! One day!!" he looked at you with an irritated face, mostly directed to the receipts. "Oh...then I guess we won't be able to go to the movies today?" He froze. "Well based from the little souvenir Beel brought I guess I can't. I need to pay these off and record his damn debt. I'm sorry... I swear Beel is gonna face my whip when I see him!!! Receipts and a cancelled date!! Beelzebub you piece of s-" Bael's eyes were filled with rage as he crumpled a handful of receipts. He inhaled, calming himself down. "I guess I failed you again huh, sorry sweetie. Really. I'm sorry for being busy." He rubbed the back of his neck while apologizing profusely. "No!! It's fine! Really, it's a good thing so that I don't get to see to many people...yk they always call you 'your majesty'" you sheepishly said, blushing. You then hang out in Bael's office while Bael was raging and signing documents and calling stores that Beel came last night.

👑Like Beel, he knows whether you're upset because of your scent. He doesn't shamelessly sniff you in public like beel, but he knows how you feel because of his sense of smell and observation.

👑Opposite to beel, he likes the relationship nice and slow.

There are two types of how people act with their favorite food: Eat it fast and get more, or eat it slowly and savor it. Bael is the later. He lets you take your time and get used to the weird life in Abyssos, where it was common to see naked people fucking in alleyways. He never pushed you into anything extreme, one reason is he's always busy and another is, he wanted to take your relationship similar to his favorite food, he wants to savor it til the end.

👑He was pretty insecure with other couples the way he was treating you.

"Don't you think my king is amazing? He's a bit peculiar but everyone in Abyssos likes him" Bael says as he was signing papers. "Hmm yeah I think so too" You were on the couch, playing on your phone. "Don't think you'd rather date my king than me?" Bael stopped signing the documents in front of him, waiting for your response. "Huh? Why would I?" You looked at him, a bit shocked. "Well maybe because he's hotter? He's more amazing? And I'm just, Bael. I'm not him. I-" He somehow sounded a bit pained. "Why would I do that? I like Bael not Beelzebub. I like you for you, not because you're similar to his Majesty, Beel." You didn't usually speak up, but you felt the need to do so. "Thanks sweetest." He smiled and went to the couch.

👑Sometimes shy to admit but he wants to sniff your sweat in your legs.

You went home after jogging. You were a bit sweaty and somehow Bael smell your sweat in your armpits and legs. "H-hey" Bael said, trying to be calm, while he's becoming a bit red. "Are you okay?" You approached him and put a hand on his forehead. "You're heating up...." you added. "I-I can smell you" Bael have a hard time breathing and he's becoming red. "Pardon?" you tilt your head "You smell delicious." Bael was full blown horny and pounced on you. Let's just say you couldn't walk the next day and he apologized ;).

Masterlist

[cosmchorror]

taking a drag of her cigarette, evren raked her gaze over the man in front of her. he looked haggard and, other than the shovel in his hand, relatively harmless. after taking a quick mental inventory of the knives hidden beneath her clothes, she dropped her cig and crushed it beneath her boot. "why do you say that?" ev tilted her head. "do you work here? or is grave digging a hobby of yours?"

Status: Open Time: Between 9pm and 3am

The scent of wet earth clung to his frame as Parker cast an icy-eyed stare forward, almost as though he was looking past the person he rather suddenly found himself in front of. Or had they found themselves in front of him? The sun was gone, leaving a warm, if humid, presence lingering in the air. The street light overhead was broken, as many of them seemed to be around there, and the only light coming from Parker himself was via the lantern he held up in one hand.

In his other was a long, broad-headed shovel which was only partially the cause for the smell. Dirt and grass stains could be seen where the light from the lantern failed to reflect on the shovel's dull metal. He looked like he had been working until quite recently, though the rings under his eyes were hidden somewhat by the light. Then again, he always looked like that; perpetually interrupted in the middle of thinking about something, wondering silently, or powering through his duties.

"...You shouldn't be here." Vague, and with a frame as domineering as Parker's, carrying a strange weight with it.

[thecynthh]

smart ass - M.S

synopsis - matt’s not doing to well with his schooling but is determined to get his degree and pass his classes. one essay which is a huge part of their grade haunts him with a bad mark, luckily y/n is willing to him him

notes - college setting, no smut yet, more of matt in the next part, hopefully a long series !

author notes - heyyyyy so this is my first series i guess, i hope you guys like this and i promise not to take too long with the next part. love all u babes and j hope u have a nice new years if you celebrate it!

——————————————————————————

——————————————————————————

a notification appears on my laptop, new grade from Ms.Garcia. shrugs and groans rung throughout the lecture hall, clicking on the notification a website pops up onto my desktop.

*97%,A+ good job y/n keep up the good work*

what were people so upset about, i thought to myself. my shoulder gets tapped by the person beside me.

“oh my god this old woman just hates me,” madi cries from beside me. i peak over at madi’s screen seeing a whopping 54%. i dont understand how that happens to a girl like madi, she was so smart and didn’t deserve that grade. i knew she didnt deserve that, i read her essay myself !

my hand lands on hers, “ okay that’s actually insane for you to be getting a 54, your essay was so good?!?”

everyone's head shoots up to the women below the many rows of seats, “so as you see at your grades only ms y/n got a good grade. i'm willing to let everyone else rewrite their exam and hand it in by next week if you do not like your grade.” the decrepit woman just packs her bag after saying that and begins to leave the room. everyone replicated her and began to pack up their belongings, including me.

madi and i leave the large space and stand in the hall just outside. “oh fuck, i promised nick id meet him after our class, ill see you later babes.” she ghosts a kiss on my cheek as i do the same to her greeting her goodbye. i grab my phone to check the time but to mostly look busy before i head somewhere else.

large footsteps creep up behind me and i hear my name being called. “y/n? thats your name right?” a man around 5’8 is standing in front of me. a little startled i take a second to reply.

“uhm yes that's me” i say replying to him. i notice his outfit, simple black cargos with a baggy sweater over it saying RANSOM with angel wings projecting off of the word.

“s-so i was wondering if you were willing to help me with the essay, you know, maybe study the material more?” he says while slightly looking down and looking very nervous.

“oh yea! of course i’ll bring over my notes and materials that i got from Ms.Garcia. does friday work for you? i have work tomorrow so i’ll be busy after class…” i cringe at my own sentence.

i knew who matt was, he was quite the popular guy and a social media influencer who made a lot of money. he didn’t have to exactly work a normal job like i did. although i don’t blame him, i’ve watched some of their videos and if i’m being honest they are pretty funny. i’ve slowly started to keep up with them ever since i was introduced to them by madi at an influencer party where she and the triplets got invited.

“mhm friday works, you can swing by my house, my brothers won’t be home that night. thanks for this by the way.” he says with his face softening, he definitely seemed more relaxed after i said yes.

“okay then! it’s a date- oh well not really a date, but i mean date as in like… oh you get it.” i trip over my words and finally take in his features. he has a beautiful jawline and scruffy that would feel so good on my-

he chuckles at my mishap “yeah it’s a date just lemme give you my number i’ll text you the address soon.” i present my phone to him as he begins to type out his phone number into his phone, naming his self matt s with a panda emoji next to it.

he’s still typing a little after he names himself, thinking nothing of it i just let him place my phone back into my hand at him as i wave to him bidding him goodbye.

i let my shoulders relax after i see him turn a corner and is out of my line of sight. god why am i so bad at talking to guys, that was straight embarrassing, i thought to myself.

——————

thursday afternoon

madi and i met for coffee after our classes were finished, we caught up ate some small pastries and drank coffee, the usual. but once i told her about what happened yesterday….

“YOU WHAT??” madi says, nearly snorting out her coffee from her nose.

“i agreed to help tutor matt so he can pass this class” i repeat to her seeing zero problem with this.

“so you wanna tutor him, at his house, without his brothers home, at night.” madi tells me in a “matter of fact” tone

“well if you say it like that it sounds like i’m dancing with the devil over here.” i say sarcastically still not seeing the problem.

“you. matt. alone. even after what happened at the party?” madi retorts bringing up the party again.

“okay i still have no fucking clue what you mean by matt was eyefucking me at that party, i was enjoying myself and he was more or less just observing everyone at the party.” god just hearing myself make me realize what is happening.

“you know, just good luck and please don’t be so naive, i don’t want you to get hurt.” madi says in such a sincere tone.

“i’m glad you are at least okay with the whole idea of it, but i gotta go, i have a shift in an hour.” i tell her collecting my things, she stands up and ghosts a kiss on my cheak.

“kk love ya girl, i’ll see you tomorrow.” madi says waving me off before i become late for my shift.

let’s just hope she has at least a little bit of faith in me.

authors note - YAYAYAYAYAY IM SO EXCITED FOR THIS !!!

[foressfaction]

:Ticci Toby:{A Rewrite}

CHAPTER 4

WARNING:: This story contains EXTREMELY triggering topics such as Domestic/Child/Substance abuse, Death, harsh language, GORE and dissociation triggers. This story mentions mental illnesses and disorders such as Depression, PTSD, ADHD, and Tourette's Syndrome. !!TICS MAY BE TRIGGERING!!

Chapter four

Later that night, Toby sat alone in his room, surrounded by notebook pages full of small doodles. Stick men and symbols, one that stood out the most, a bunch of circles and X's. He found it fun to draw, therefore obviously showed it. There was a knock on his door, glancing up, Toby hummed out a response. "Come in."

The door opened and Lyra stood in the hallway, stepping in to catch first glance at all of the little pages who Toby started to clean up, shoving it all back into the original journal he tore them from.

"Dumb, right? These d-d-drawings, am I crazy? Lyra, am I a freak."

Lyra's eyes widened softly as she got down to sit in front of him. "no no no you're not, who told you that?"

Toby turned and pulled something from his bag, the note that was slammed onto his back when leaving school. He unwrinkled the paper and held it out of her. Lyra's shoulders dropped, it seemed she too had the same reaction to the note as he did when he first laid eyes on it. Her eyes darted back up to him with an angry expression. "You're seriously going to let these kids bully you like this?" Toby just looked down with a huff.

"I've never been put with these kinds of k-kids, i c-can't blame them if they hate me, hah..i'm not exactly that likable."

Lyra was quick to correct him, grabbing his right hand. "Don't say that, Toby, you're the strongest, most lovable person I know, you mean so much to me..i…I can't bear seeing this happen to you." tears were forming in her eyes, her hand squeezing his.

"Here…" She held his hand up and mimicked something with her other hand. "I'm going to show you how to make a fist, okay." She moved his hand into a fist shape, making sure his thumb was rested over his fingers. "Make sure your thumb is always on top, if not, you'll break it." Her words were gentle, and so were her movements. She was careful about his jerky arms, keeping them down if he was going to accidentally hit her or himself. Lyra continued on with explaining the idea of fighting. She did take 6 years of karate before the family broke apart. "Your hands are weapons, don't ever use them unless you have a good reason..if someone hits you first, go crazy, kick, hit, bite even."

Toby laughed a little, it was a weak one, but he did laugh. The idea of biting someone was somewhat funny. "No but I am serious." She admitted, earning his eyes to glance back up, locking onto her worried expression. "Promise me you will stick up for yourself..if this progresses. The last thing I want to see is you hurt."

Her hand still laid over his now fist of a hand. Toby then made a fist with his other hand, showing her. Lyra nodded. "Yep, just like that." She lowered it. "I want you to be…violent when it's the time, but i also don't want to be blamed if you accidentally knock someone unconscious." She slightly joked, but it was also serious.

Toby looked down with a small hum. "Please, Toby?"

He looked up. "Don't hurt anyone unless they hurt you." She warned.

Toby just stayed quiet, but eventually spoke. "Okay, I promise, but wh-what about dad? When he hurts mom—" He was cut off quickly by her tugging his arm. "That's a different story…We're talking kids the same age as you,"

"But when he hurts you—is that an e-e-excuse to hit him?" Lyra quickly just pulled him into a hug once more, squeezing tighter than she usually would. Was this an attempt to shut him up? "Let's not talk about that yet…If it was an excuse don't you think i would've done something about this by now?"

She shivered a little, not letting go. "School will be over in just a few months..it'll go fast, i really hope you won't need to use these." She gestured to his hands, by which she just saw a few new blemishes that covered them.

"Are you chewing on them again?" Lyra asked with a sad sigh.

"mhh yes but- not as much as last year." The last thing Toby wanted were those tight straps of gauze wrapped around his hands to the point he couldn't even use them.

"Okay, get some sleep bud..like actually, get some sleep..it's starting to look like you got into my eyeliner again." she gestured to his dark circles that were beginning to get more and more noticable.

Toby nodded and sat everything that was once strolled out to the side by his night stand. Lyra left the room and closed the door.

Toby looked down to his hands, seeing the gnawing marks and small concrete scrapes from falling so much. His knees and elbows were covered in healing and recent bruises, who knows how many little cuts and scratches he had in total. He never could remember getting most of them.

At night his room would get pretty creepy. The whole night was the definition of paranoia. Toby would make out black shadows, deep whispers and even started to feel pressure on his bed like something was crawling onto it, or sitting on the edge. Toby would make himself as small as possible when he slept, in an attempt to not be woken up by his mind playing tricks on him.

Weeks would go by painfully slowly. Toby started to feel like he lived at school and only visited home. On this day though…He wished he never did come home.

•••••

[toaster-hair]

There’s a Human in the Neighborhood! (chapter 5)

(important authors note: Hi nyall :3! Sorry i havent written in so long, ive been more hyperfixated on other things like across the spiderverse and lolita fashion, and i’ve also been working on other projects. I have a skullgirls au tumblr blog, my original comic raw!fruit, im redrawing the welcome homes cast’s portraits with my own headcanons added, as well as general oc content. But with welcome homes new update, it motivated me to write again. I feel as though when welcome home is finally finished up, ill rewrite this entire fic to make much more sense. Anyways, heres a content warning. As said before, this fic focuses on how gross human anatomy can confuse wholesome puppets. Its a bit hard to write about gross anatomy stuff without veering into nsfw territory, so suggestions would be appreciated. But this chapter in particular is about periods! The fic is written about a gender neutral AFAB reader, so if youre amab or if periods are just off the table for you, feel free to skip!)

A painful stab at your stomach woke you up from your slumber. “Ough..” your sudden movement spooked your cat. You held your torso in pain, feeling a sharpness in your pants. It was still dark, with the only light being the sun coming through your blinds. You stood up, making your way to the bathroom and….

Blood. Lots and lots of blood stained your undergarments. That explained the sudden pain you were feeling, it was just that time of the month! You went back to your bedroom to make sure you didn’t bleed the bed, grabbed some clean clothes, and turned the shower on. You also grabbed some pads out of the cabinet under the sink. You brought them from your old house but you should probably buy some more later.

You stepped into your shower and let the warm water soak your body head to toe, flourishing yourself with all kinds of soap. Once you were finally cleaned up, you stepped out and dried yourself. You put on your clean clothes, grabbed some pain killers, and went back to bed.

-

You woke up once again a few hours later. You got up, did your morning routine, had breakfast, fed your cat, and picked up the phone. You decided you would call in sick because of the pain and nausea. God, why does the first day have to be the most painful? You dialed the number for FishEgg Boba and waited for an answer.

“Helloo? This is FishEgg Bobaaa. How may I help youuu?” You heard Casper answer the phone.

“Hey Casper, It’s Y/N. Uhh.. I know it’s only my second day but I’m calling in sick. I’ve got… cramps real bad. I don’t wanna move that much. Is that okay?” 

“Oooh. Sure that’s fiiine. Just make sure to come in tomorroww. See you thenn. Hope you feel better sooon.” And with that, he ended the call. You felt kind of bad. It was only your second day, and you were taking a break already. You were probably missing out on some training too! But at the same time, everyone made it seem like yesterday you were working too hard when you weren’t even on your period! You can’t imagine what it’ll be like to work like that while on your period. 

You then remembered your plan to get more pads. You were good for now, but it was always a good idea to stock up. You put on some outdoor clothes consisting of some basic gym sweats and a baggy jacket. You gave your kitty a goodbye kiss on the forehead and headed out the door. Gee, this was the second time in a row that you went to Howdy’s. 

Wait… Oh yeah they’re puppets. I forgot. I mean you forgot that they were puppets. Of course they won’t have pads. You went back inside and grabbed some money, looks like you were heading out of town after all. As you headed back out again, you spotted Wally walking out of his house as well. You walked over to him, sense you promised you would chat in the morning last night.

“Hey Wally! You wanted to talk more this morning, right?” you stared down at him. 

“Oh! Yes! I wanted to know about how it went. Ah, but shouldn’t you be at work right now?” he asked.

“Oh, uh.. Yeah, the thing is that I’m uh, not feeling very well. So I’m taking the day off. I’m going back tomorrow though.”

“Ah, I see. You aren’t sick again, are you? Do you want me to go get Poppy?” He held at your knees like a dog jumping on its owner. 

“No, no. Not sick, it's just.. I may gross you out at the explanation?” You gestured with your hands “Is that okay?” You asked. He stared at you with a blank expression but nodded his head.

“Okay so basically uh.. When a human with a womb starts puberty.. Uh, and a womb is used for baby making purposes by the by, their womb starts to shed for a couple of days straight each month. That’s because the womb wants to make a baby but doesn’t have the ingredients to make one, causing the womb to pump out blood. This can cause pain, nausea, all that nasty stuff. That’s just a basic explanation, anyways.” He kind of just. Stared at you with half lidded eyes the entire time. “Uh, I don’t need to explain what blood is right?”

“Oh no, we have that too.”

…

What. 

“W-wait, if you’re bleeding.. Then.. did you just start puberty??” There was this look of anxiety on his face, which felt so odd and out of character.

“No, no, you still bleed even after puberty. Well, that is until you hit your 60’s or something. It’s not gonna go away for a while.. Haha, if I was still that young, I wouldn’t even be here!” You laughed at him a bit. He let out a sigh of relief. 

“Sorry.. I don’t know much about how human bodies work…” He looked away out of embarrassment.

“Oh, I can show you.” You reassured him. “Ah- What??” He stared at you slightly horrified, slightly considering your offer.

“Yeah dude, there’s a ton of books about human anatomy. Going from the bone to the skin. I can order you one online! If you want, of course.” You pulled out your phone and showed him various different anatomy books.

“Oh… No thanks, I'm fine.” He turned down your offer in a slightly disappointed tone.

“That’s fine. I need to go out of town for a bit to go get something, see you later!” You waved goodbye as you started to walk to the train station. You then suddenly felt a sharp pain in your stomach, but you kept on walking.

You couldn’t see him, but you knew he was waving goodbye right back at you.

(A/N: i wrote this in one night i hope you enjoy!! Ill try to include sally and julie in the next chapter :3333)

[fablecore]

i was curious what you thought of the live-action One Piece now that season one is out! personally, i have the same compliants as Geoff of Mother's Basement (youtu.be/43K-H_dtQ9g?si=2n0MLLPmdw0vARk7) where, personally, my main compliants were (1) how clean some of these well-worn outfits and set-pieces were and the bigger one was (2) how Garp was altered but i, like Geoff, have my hopes that s2 can fix that by showing that this is the experience (mostly part from Mihawk) that changed Garp into more of the Garp we see in the manga. "a high 8 or low 9 out of 10" indeed. overall, i think its okay as an adaptation! i like Sanji's perviness being toned down, i dont mind most of the shuffling and changing because it is an adaptation with timeslots and seasons unlike a limitless manga with arcs however long it wants. i can understand if you or others dont like the live-action adaptation though! i just like that it was a good gateway to help me turn some of my friends into One Piece fans, less scared of how BIG One Piece is now the live-action has given them a limited taste, towards the manga or the OnePace.net-editted version of the anime (though i do still plan to have them watched some of the anime-only filler that is fun lmao maybe ill throw a sleepover or something, idk, i just like how OnePace fine-tunes the padded-out pacing problem the later One Piece episodes have) thats the main plus of the live-action adaptation to me

but im curious about your thoughts if you have any?? its okay if you never plan to watch it, i know a few other fans like that and i dont mean for my wuestion to be all peer-pressure-y or anything ♡

i've never heard of onepace until now! i'm in the same boat, i've been watching opla with my sister who's kind of interested in starting one piece but is also intimidated by the anime's episode count. maybe we can watch onepace instead. thanks for letting me know ☺️

i've only seen the first two episodes (but don't care at all about spoilers and have seen a lot already). i didn't like the first episode, zoro particularly, but the second was fun! well... it was camp. combined, i would give it the verdict of "aggressively okay" but this isn't a judgement on anyone who liked it. if you did, i'm happy you had a good time. i just have cinema brain.

what i liked so far: helmeppo's >:O face and his puma trainers. the vfx team in charge of luffy's rubberyness. buggy's "surprise, shithead!" nami's den den mushi earpiece/cellphone.

the rest:

zoro’s zombified no energy go girl give us nothing monotone. 😐 <- why did they tell him to make this face in every shot

they cut the scene where luffy gives zoro his swords back and replaced it with helmeppo ass

"a man needs to be strong. but he also needs to be good.” you are going to cut off a pirate rookie's arm and then obliterate his ship and crew later 👍

what is this whole thing about being "morally good" and "one of the good guys" and "a good pirate" it's ICKY

justice for silly winky vain nami. how are they going to do the personality shift into broody serious arlong park nami when she's been broody and serious the whole time

nami spent like 30 minutes unlocking one (1) locked cage. i guess it's because she and zoro needed to talk/get some exposition in, and i'm not going to suggest a better option because i don't want to rewrite half the script. i just found it amusing because normally it's "suspend your disbelief when a character does something amazing for the plot" and not "when a character is noticeably worse at something they really have no business being this bad at. for the plot"

i'm starting to think that zoro and nami lost core personality traits because the writers wanted them to be luffy foils instead of their actual characters

i did hear taz was the best/most charismatic actor out of the straw hats. i'm assuming this is because they let him be sanji instead of making him into a luffy foil since they have enough luffy foils

cameraperson's love affair with low angle closeups and fisheye lens. i don't hate it (it's camp) just pointing it out

i'm literally so serious about mackenyu's insufferable zoro voice. whenever i hear him talk in that joyless southern california kardashian vocal fry my blood pressure shoots through the roof. who made him do that

even though i have issues with the writing, i think objectively opla has done a decent job of pleasing fans. i'm not one of them but i know there's a lot. but on a technical and artistic level... deep sigh palms pressed together listen... i was hoping for spellbinding artistry from the showrunners. beautifully lit scenes, beautiful camerawork, excellent technical chops, lingering shots of luffy's bruised knuckles, the slightly frayed fabric on zoro's swords, a super close-up of a log pose with the crew talking behind the compass needle, their bodies distorted by the glass. fingerprints on kerosene lamps. barnacles on rotting wood. a searingly hot-blue summer sky (super saturated in post) over shells town or wherever. i wanted lush gorgeous rich interesting artistic ideas from the directors and cinematographers. i haven't seen any of that so far, and what i have seen doesn't compel me to watch more. i'm not saying the actual cinematography was bad! just. okay. it was okay.

(but also some of the nighttime/underlit scenes are bad. put a dang key light on your actors 🤺)

concluding thoughts: at the end of the day, if netflix wants to keep throwing millions per episode at tomorrow studios, i'm fine with overlooking mediocre filmmaking and storytelling. i want everyone in the production crew to get their bag. i hope this show runs for another 50 seasons and is powered by union labor forever and ever until the end of time amen

[graciegoeskrazy]

Sharper (rewrite) - Chapter 1 - i feel the earth move

Warnings: Language, mention of rape, mentions of kidnaping, mentions of sexual assault, Mentions of CPS, social workers, bars, New York City (lol), mentions of sex workers, mentions of drugs and drinking

Word Count: ~3,000

A/N: READ THE WARNINGS. Its me hi I’m the fucking writer thats always missing its me. Okay we have a series yay! I know this seems really fucking crazy but I’ve had this idea for a really long time and I’m really excited for y’all to read. So far i have the first chapter (duh) and last chapter done along with some bits in between and I’m really excited for y’all too read. Okay thats all ill say now okay i love u byeeeee

The streets of New York City were never friendly. Especially to 16 year olds like you. Rain poured and mixed into the dirty snow that had fallen earlier that day, creating a rotten and thick atmosphere surrounding the city. You thought about other families on Christmas Eve. Kids getting ready for bed, awaiting the arrival of Santa and the presents he’ll bring. Families walking home from church, admiring the lights that covered the city. You should be experiencing things like that - joy, cheer, happiness. However, it all seemed to be the exact opposite.

After your mom died you were immediately thrown at CPS who sent you straight into foster care. You had no family except your mom. Your grandparents might have been alive but you had no fucking clue because they turned their backs on your mom and you the second they found out she was pregnant. With no support and no money, your broke single money turned to being a sex worker. And even though there were friends she made along the way at work and they treated you like you were their niece, all of them knew that living with them in the midst of their line of work was no place for a kid. They cared too much to let you be around that, and you understood. So, foster care it was.

Your foster parents honestly didn’t give a shit, so you offered a deal to them - give you a share of the money they get monthly from the state, and you will be out of their hair and will never ask for anything from them. Not surprisingly at all, they said yes. When your social worker found out, she didn’t care, she just wanted a cut of your money. For awhile, you would stay in and out of shelters throughout the city, eventually leaving after a little while to avoid the risk of anyone getting suspicious and calling CPS. When that didn’t work, you would bounce between the couches of your friends, slowly but surely giving up hope of ever finding a permanent home. Even with your cut from your foster parents and money at your shitty job at Starbucks your social worker set you up with, it still definitely wasn’t enough to pay rent of anything. But it was enough to pay for your own food, your own clothes, and a ticket from point a to point b. So that was how you lived. For 10 whole months. And that’s what its looked like for the past week. Couch hopping, working, still going to fucking school, and all the while not having a single moment to grieve the loss of your mom.

You were on the way to a bar to have your annual meeting with your social worker. You had an informal meeting with your social worker at least every other week. Even though they were brief, they were still a constant pain in your ass. You wanted life to keep moving. Move away from the pain and heartache of your mom’s death, and all the other pain and suffering that came along with it, but these meetings always seemed to drag you back under. It always felt like a constant reminder of what you went through and how you got here.

You immediately spotted her. You sat down across from her at a table. She continued writing down whatever it was she was doing as you walked in. She acknowledged your presence, but never looked up once.

“You’re late.” She said.

“Yeah. I know. I couldn’t get a cab. It’s fucking Christmas Eve.” You said as you sat.

She finally met your gaze, “What have I said about cursing?”

You just shrugged, “Last time I checked I don’t get in trouble for language.”

Jenny sighed again, “It’s still not classy.”

“Meeting at a bar at nearly midnight with your 16 year old client isn’t classy either.”

“It's a restaurant too.” She said, matter of factly.

You rolled your eyes and Jenny let out a smirk, knowing she had gotten under your skin already. She straightened up at an attempt to reset. “How’s life been treating you Mazie?”

“Pretty Shitily.”

Jenny continued to write in her files. “I can imagine. Where were you tonight?”

You took a seat, “Out with a friend from work. Caroline.”

“A friend from work at Starbucks?”

You looked anywhere but her, already tired of her fake niceties “Yeah.”

“How’s the Job you like it?”

You signed. “Yeah, I guess.”

“Working hard? Putting in the hours?”

“Yeah.”

Jenny finally looked up. “Hmm. That’s really interesting because I checked in on the Starbucks you’re working at and they said you got fired 2 weeks ago.”

You were caught.

For a moment you thought about keeping up with the lie. But you very quickly came to the conclusion that it would only make things worse. “Okay listen, I can explain.”

“Strike one.” She said, as she went back to write in her files, probable making note of your job status.

“Listen to me, My boss, Samuel...he was being a real perv-“

“To you or others?”

You paused and shrugged, eyes never leaving her. “What do you think?”

Jenny looked down. She wouldn’t wish what you had been through on anybody, But she wasn’t gonna let you off the hook. Job or no job, someone would find out sooner or later and it would end up getting herself in trouble

“it’s apart of your agreement.”

“You taking a cut from my foster parents isn't a part of the agreement?!”

“Quiet down, will you? Look, I'm trying to help you. I know it’s been rough since you lost your Mom, and all i’m trying to do is help you maintain a life. A life your mom would’ve wanted.”

“My mom wouldn’t want me in a fucking foster system or working shifts at starbucks for less than minimum wage.”

“Look, I don’t really give a shit. I’m just trying to do my job.”

“That’s a first-”

“Cut it out.” She said Sharply. “Can we carry on with the questions?”

You nodded.

Jenny continued, “Last time you did drugs?”

You rolled your eyes, “I’ve told you, since I went into the system.”

“So a couple months, huh?”

“Yeah.”

“So let me ask you this. If I get a drug test from my car, it’s gonna come back negative, right? Because you haven’t done anything tonight?”

“Yeah.” You said hesitantly.

“Are you sure about that? Because im gonna be really fucking pissed if I have to go all the way to my car and back to get a drug test just to prove that you’ve been lying to me.”

You knew that she knew. There was no getting out of it. “Ok so I may have done a little tonight. But it wasn’t a lot! It was barely any!”

“Strike 2.”

“C’mon man!”

“Do you want me to bring you in right now? Is that what you want? Cause I’d be happy to hand you over to another couple who don’t give a single shit about you.”

“You’re a fucking monster.”

“No. I’m just doing my job.”

“And you’re pretty fucking bad at it.” A new voice spoke. Your eyes caught sight of a man with dark hair and a long black trench coat. You looked slightly familiar, but Jenny continued to speak before you had the chance to fully question his familiarity.

“Excuse me?” She said,

“I’m just saying, If there’s a reason she’s acting like this then maybe you’re doing something wrong.”

Confusion made itself apparent on your face as you looked at the two as the continued to speak.

“Sir, can I help you?”

“Yeah.” He said with a smile before it morphed into a blank stare. “No.” he said.

He must be drunk as hell.

He cleared his throat before continuing. “Look, let me pay you to walk away.

Jenny’s unimpressed expression never changed as she spoke. “You must be drunk.”

The man laughed. “Yeah, maybe.”

Knew it.

——-

Jenny and the man continued to talk quietly, coming up with some sort of price. You were absolutely speechless. Maybe I can make a run for it now? That would definitely lead to trouble once Jenny inevitably found you again. What about when she leaves? When it’s just me and that dude? That could work. Throughout all the questions filling up your brain, the most frequent one was equally simple and terrifying… What the hell did he want with me?

Before you could fully think about that one, Jenny came back, seemingly packing up her files and folders Not saying a word to you. So, you spoke up.

“You really gonna let him do this?!”

She rolled her eyes. “You’ll be fine. He’ll probably let you walk away, your record will stay spotless, and I won't have to deal with your bullshit-”

“Are you fucking insane?! Look at him he’s probably gonna assault me or rape me or something sketchy as hell.!”

“Not my problem.”

“Yes, it’s your problem. That's your fucking job!”

She turned to give you one last cold glare. “Well…nothing you haven't dealt with before.”

You were speechless. All you wanted to do was punch her across the face until she was out cold, but nothing would come out.

She made her way out the door but turned out to give you one last glare. “Happy Holidays motherfucker.” she said.

You were slouched in your seat, arms crossed, eyes looking down in disbelief. From the second you got a good look at his guy, you knew he was bad news. You had yet to learn what would happen or where you would end up next. You snapped out of your thoughts when a certain voice appeared.

“Hi.” He said, sounding almost chipper.

You didn’t respond, just stared at him, arms still crossed. He took another sip of his drink before continuing. “What’s your name?”

“...Mazie.” You said hesitantly.

He sucked in a breath. You weren't sure what that meant, but you had no time to think about it before he continued talking.

“How old are you Mazie?”

You hesitated. What kind of creepy ass shit was he into?

“16.” You said sharply. You couldn’t let down your guard for one second. You were tough and not to be messed with, and this guy needed to know that.

You noticed how he hesitated again. He took one last sip of his drink before standing up off the stool and making his way towards you,but still giving you some space.

“Wanna go for a ride?”

“Not really, no.” You quickly said.

He hummed. “May I?” he said, gesturing to the seat across from you in the booth you were still sitting in.

“It's a free country isn't it?” You said. He took that as a yes.

“I’m Max.” He reached out his hand as an offering. You pondered for a moment, then shook his hand.

“What do you want with me, Max?”

He let out a slight dry chuckle. “I’m not gonna hurt you, Mazie. If that's what your thinking”

“Soooo…you just gonna let me go? Pay a random woman 7.000 cash to let a random 16-year-old free out of what…the goodness of your heart?”

“I need your help.”

“With what?”

“Come with me.”

He led you outside. Waiting for you both was a sleek, black, sports car you presumed was Max’s. He opened the door for you and gestured for you to get in.

“Fuck no.” You spat.

“I told you I’m not gonna hurt you-”

“And why should I believe you?”

He was about to open his mouth but stopped himself.

“You can’t really I guess.”

That caught you off guard. For some reason it made you trust him a tiny bit more. For whatever reason, you were definitely interested in whatever skeam he had planned.

He reached into the car and pulled out a wad of cash. “Here,” he said, throwing it to you.

You caught it and took a look. $1,000 dollars cash was sitting in the palm of your hand. You tried to remain natural and chill. “What’s this for?” you asked.

“That’s your cut.”

“You shouldn’t be drinking and driving.”

“And you shouldn’t be alone on the streets of New York.”

“I shouldn’t be talking to strangers ethier. Let alone getting in the car with them.”

“Let’s not be strangers then, huh?”

The car ride was quiet. He put on some sort of Christmas music on low volume as he drove. The city was alive and bright. People and families crowding the streets, once again making you think of your family and what you used to have. Those thoughts came to a halt as he pulled into a large parking garage next to what you assumed to be Max’s apartment building. A doorman created the two of you as he led you to the elevator. The both of you still hadn’t said a word since the bar.

He opened the door and motioned for you to go inside.

“You think I'm dumb or something? I’m not going in there.”

He rolled his eyes before looking at you. “This entire apartment complex is filled head to toe with multiple alarm systems, 4 Security guards only a couple floors down, one of which you met and knows your face, and constantly servailed cameras in every corner.”

You just stared at him, trying to think of something to say. He beat you to it.

“And if you wanted to leave, I would let you leave.”

You nodded, and walked in.

His apartment was smaller than you expected, but you were mainly surprised about how clean it was.

“Cool Place.” You said.

He took his jacket off and put his keys down.

“You can sleep on the couch, or leave if you want. No drugs. No coming into my room.”

He slammed the door, not giving you another look. “Coolio.”

This is gonna be interesting.

——-

The clanging of pots and pans startled you. You turned to see max preparing some kind of breakfast.

“Morning.” He said.

You didn’t reply, just stood still. Taking in and remembering all of the events that took place the night before. He continued.

“What’s your favorite movie?”

Out of everything he could’ve said, you didn’t expect those word to come out of her mouth. “What’s my favorite movie?”

He nodded.

“Interstellar.” You said without taking your eyes off him, trying to keep up the tough exterior.

“Really? Why?”

“I like space and I have daddy issues.” You said bluntly. He made a mental note to check in on that later. He continued, “I think it's a classic.”

“You like that one?” You said surprised as you took a sip of the coffee he gave you.

“Yeah. It's always been a favorite of mine.”

“Damn, I can’t believe you’ve actually seen that film.”

“I haven’t.” He said, giving you a glare.

“What?”

“I lied.”

“Why?”

“To trick you.”

“Okay?” You were thoroughly confused.

Max got up. “That’s what I’m gonna teach you to do.”

You sat in silence as he grabbed a stack of newspapers and but the on the coffee table in front of you. “Read those. Front to back.”

You scoffed and picked up the papers. “Are you fucking kidding me?”

“Where’s that money I gave you?”

“In my jacket.”

He grabbed it and turned to you. From now on, every time you curse I get 100 back.”

“Fuck that, that’s my money!”

He pulled it away before you could grab it back from him.

“Another 100 gone. 800 left.” He put the remaining money back on the table and you immediately put it into your pants pocket.

“Where are you going?” You said.

“Out. I’ll be back later. Read those or leave.”

He slammed the door.

You just stood there.

How did the fuck did I get here?

[marsbotz]

hello I keep seeing u talk ab loving skybound but I'm curious as to why u love it, and would LOVE to read a super in-depth explanation bc im kinda a skybound notliker and ik uve changed my mind on certain thigns ab this show b4, and I was hoping u cld do it again !!! :DDD /gen

YEAH. OKAY !!! sorry this is super long and rambly i already had to rewrite it once cus tumblr ate it lol... and also sorry its all basically abt jay (running away embarrassed)

first of all let me say i do think skybound is a BAD season. having the characters suddenly all be sexist out of nowhere to drive plot is stupidddd and so is having a retcon ending that makes it all redundant except for Jaya Canon Now. i think thats mostly what makes the fandom not like it. BUT. i think its sooo interesting for like so many reasons also

i think s8 is considered the darkest season which is fair. but skybound also has a crazyyy amount of dark and DEEPLY interesting things it touches on. the ninja disappearing one by one. jays birth father being his favourite actor. jay torture. jaya actually being interesting!! lets talk abt these.

having the ninja slowly be cut out of the season is GREAT for not only building tension but also being able to more deeply build upon jay and nyas characters (and their relationship). the 22 min format means that some characters (like wu and kai) are gone for AGES. which is sad for kai fans but greatttt for the season. it rlly makes u feel their absence, and some of their disappearances are scary!! zane trying to outsmart nadakhan but realising too late hes been tricked... AHH!!!

if you compare this to how they did it in s12 its a lot more impactful as theres more time for the characters to... be gone. and the videogame nature rlly does take away a lot of the tension IMO. if jays mothers had been in prime empire like planned.... it would have been a GREAT parallel i think but as it is its just kind of odd. thats another convo tho lol (altho there issss the mention of jay being adopted at the end. very interesting [it goes nowhere])

i literally think abt jay adoption arc every god damn day of my life. ill try to explain this without getting too deep into my personal sicko hcs lol. first you get a rlly nice callback to s1 w jay being ashamed of his parents and living in a junkyard only to realise how litte he cares once theyre threatened. thennn you have the whole situation at cliffs house. jay finds out the man who abandoned him at birth (possibly? we dont know details) is the actor for fritz donnegan. the same character who jay imitated and aspired to be like. and then he realises his father felt the same admiration towards jay!! and they both never knew!!!

i think this twist is what makes a lot of jays behaviour in s6.... not excusable... but understandable. jay is shown to be insecure and have weird fucking ways of coping with this (lying. lying lying all the time) and so it kinda feels natural that his way of coping with this information would be to 1. hide the fact he made wishes 2. try to imitate his father through his book and 3. Never Speak Of This Again.

speaking of that lets talk about jay being tortured. can we talk about that?? they FUCKED him up. but the most important part out of allll of it is a character trait i rarely see ppl attribute to jay even though its like... pretty consistent for him. is his willpower!! hes able to endure days of torture to the point where he can barely walk and talk at the end of it just to stop nadakhan from gaining more power

nadakhan also directly points out jays insecurities and how they make him lie to his friends... and jays able to show some of his smarts thru trying to get flintlocke to stage a mutiny! honestly the whole episode is so damn interesting it makes me SEETHE its not more talked abt LOL

i wont get into my insanely complex jaya opinions rn but i will say s6 has one of the most interesting depictions of the ship to me. nya being reluctant to date jay due to being seen simply as his girlfriend is soooo interesting and fits well w her arc of not wanting to give up her own deal w sam x to become a ninja. its just a shame they had to retroactively make everyone misogynistic to do so lolol... and the ending w jays wish Potentially forcing them together is soooo odd and kinda goes what the rest of the season was setting up for them. THIS IS MAINLY why i think ppl hate this season. cus it sets up SOOO much cool stuff and then drops it all last second

i think the things that could have saved skybound from being so hated would be

1. do the same plotpoints w nya but dont drag the ninja AND DARETH into it ..... make them supportive of her!

2. makes jays final wish have some FUCKING consequence! you could do a LOT with how he worded it to twist it badly (im a nadakhan return truther for life)

3. not dropping every single intersting character trait ever. and also not dropping the GOD DAMN ADOPTION ARCCCCCC and also not revealing jay to be so crushingly insecure he physically cannot stop himself from lying to ppl and putting on a happy mask and then turn him into a one note comic relief character. [becoming a soulless husk]

LOL i realise this sounds now like i hate skybound I DONT i just think its very flawed. BUT thats whyyyy i love it... because its so interesting! its flawed in a way like "there is soooo much i cld do w this" and not like "i dont care about any of this its so bad". w ninjago my fav parts have always been the weird icky edgy parts that are almost too much for what it is... which is a childrens lego show. ik they cld never have done most of the interesting stuff i imagine coming out of skybound and thats ok! bc i get to think abt it evilly.

heres some assorted things i love and think are fun in skybound

kai and zane banter at the repo yard

ronin capturing the ninja!! specifically him shutting down zane from the inside is super scary and cool

NINJA IN PRISON!!!!! i almost threw up when they went to jail in crystallised its so fuckign fun. SKYBOUND 2!!!

zane playing chess against nadakahn. another scary zane moment

jay trusting only cole w the truth abt his wishes (HELL YES BROTHER)

clanceeeeee <3 him being like one sided friends w jay and standing up to nadakhan at the end of it all... wahhh

NINJA REPLACEMENTS. so fucking funny i love jay and his assortment of old guys And Skylor

everytime i watch it i cant stop thinking of this ytp and it makes me cry. its not even that funny i just have watched it like 50 times

its dungeon media. this is smth i made up and only i know abt . dont worry abt it but its true

ok my brain is mush HOPE THIS MAKES. some sort of sense . bascially trying to condense 6 years of Thoughts into coherent analysis is impossible for me LOL

[seven-stars-in-his-palm]

ok. i took a long, long time (song ref) but hi!!!!!!!!!

1. titanic fic (*cue shit-eating grin*). umum. im curious if there's anything about the morse code yet. or codes in gen actually. so. sentences with the word "code" :3

2. titanic vid!!!! Idk if you like the engineering aspects, but there still were a ton of other facts sprinkled in (spiral staircases, people that monitored coal balance, separate staff room for firemen, how they got air down there etc) https://youtube.com/watch?v=4begc_U8ygI#searching

3. surprise!! this is an interview. i have some Official Author questions for you (feel free to pick and choose, come back to this later, or just striaght up ignore lol):

3a. Do you have any authors (professional or not) that you aspire to be like one day?

3b. Following that up, are there any specific works (again, published, professional, etc or just amazing amateur works!!) that really inspire you?

3c. What made you start writing? I'm curious on anything that led to the conscious decision, of course, but additionally do you think there was anything you grew up with that "planted the seeds"? Was it any of the people from question 3a?

3d. What's the silliest (/pos) idea you've ever had for a fic? If you didn't write/publish it, why not? Was it a recent thing? If not, do you think your experience would have influenced that idea today?

if those dont make sense u can send me a messgae or something 👍👍👍 goodnight

ITS BEEN THREE DAYS but im here okay……. lets do this. hi pep :>

1) alas, i’ve been focusing on a lot of other things so i havent reached a written point of the Code Usage, which begins in like chapter 3-4. sorry man 💔 (progress has been made ! just not as much as i’d hope 😭)

2) FUN FACTS?!??!??!??!!?!!? IM WATCHING A DOCUMENTARY RN BUT IM YOINKING THIS RIGHT AFTER YIPPIE!!!!!!!!

3a) uhmmmmmmmm i dont exactly pay attention to authors as much as i pay attention to books but you know what. rick riordan. not because of anything he’s done or written but because of his audacity to write 20+ books in the same universe and still get 100000000000000 people 1000000% invested in it. i wanna write sequels forever. can i be him

3b) OHHHHHHHH UHM UHM UHM UHM the thing that got me into fanfic specifically was the fic “versability” (it was a gf fic about ‘what if ford never made the portal’, written like 2015-16, and yeah i did know of and even read a bit of fic beforehand but i was never into it) but just READING ? the land of stories by chris colfer, easy. mmmmmmmmm that was my fucking Thing. if i wasnt a baby at that time i would have WROTE. SO. MUCH. GOOD GOD. IT WAS MY THING. THE THING THAT GOT ME INTO NOVELS. URGH. alex my iconic mentally ill bisexual, conner my precious cynical boy. i need to read those again my GOD now i think about it that was fairytale fanfiction that happejed to bepublished and ohhhhh it was beautiful. im gonna read jt . iM GONNA DO IT!!!!

3c) in writing in general or just fanfic? for fanfic its that one day i had an gf fic idea (that i had to heavily revise/rewrite, but it did end up getting out eventually) that i hadnt read anything like it, and i wanted to see it. decided: hey, im shit at writing, but might as well!!!!!! 65k words later, its not a joke anymore. im a Writer now :) but as for in general, well ofc reading books. people told me in the past im creative and should get into book writing if you like reading so much. i decided well im gonna do it professionally, but might as well do something tiny, so i well uh wrote. im not gonna tell you but it certainly was Something. classic isekai mary sue dramatic plot hybrids etc etc etc but actually the queen the mc is “related” to is actually polyam and was in a relationship with both their dad and their mom and the big villain is the queen’s sister who’s pissed that both of her lovers ditched her for the human world (but actually they had to break up because because the society was not polyam friendly. there just happened to be a war after that). everything else was basic isekai except for that little crumble of lore. the queen was a bisexual. the dad was a pansexual. the mom was a lesbian. i think i ate there to be honest

3d) mmmmmm i gotta think. there was definitely a gf x amphibia au where ford got ploped in amphibia and the plantars IMMEDIATELY stole him and wrapped him up in their adventures right when the plot starting becoming a thing (early season 2). there’s one where stan and ford just….. climb a tree. it’s laced with a lot of philosophical talks straight from good omens knowledge but ultimately its just goody fun. mmmmm theres one where gabriel has no idea what crowley looks like, but he DOES know what Bildad The Shuite looks like, itd be tiny but so so so so funny. the gf/gomens crossover…..a human au based on that one tumblr post about a necromancer bringing people back from the dead to fuck with the killer and opening a discord support group….. the s1 humans + aziraphale being the victims, crowley the necromancer, and the s2 humans being the nosy outsiders who Notice things happens but can never say shit. oughhhh……… Yeah. yeah, thats good. most of these are recent except 4 the amphibia one, wouldnt change much about it even with the shit i know now EXCEPT being able to handle the relationships/emotions between the characters better, ive certainly gotten better at it and i love it. i havent published any bc either i started but couldnt finished, or just thought it was neat and moved on to plop it in the ideas folder and wait 4 inspiration.

OKAY THATS A LOT BUT THERE YOU GO sorry for the wait, man. you’re my best cupperty you know that right 🫵 ANSWERS!!!!! and ill work on titanic as fast as i can, it hasnt been forgotten !! i just gotta mow the grass….. (“short” fic wips)

[oathofkaslana]

hi hi hi leeeee :] as a colleiwarrior it is my duty to ask about collei o7 and if you want to do it id like to hear your thoughts about xiao too hehe

HAI PLUTO!!!! ill do collei and then xiao :3

Collei:

First impression:

OHHH I LOVE HER ALREADY SHE'S SO SNARKY AND HER LORE IS SO COMPELLING....... very very excited to see her in game i hope she comes out soon (<- had to wait like what. two/three years????)

Impression now:

gives me brain worms my God. i think i've thought about her too much bc theres so many lil symbols that i associate w her that just aren't intentional in the slightest. she has so so so much lovea nd heart in her and i wishhhh people understood her better. also extremely disappointed in her in-game writing for multiple reasons but like. the ableism and misogyny being a big one. :( colleination could fix her...... i wish she were more mean in the game.

Favorite moment:

her fight w kaeya and the subsequent "confrontation" w amber....... makes me so so sick in the head that was The original collei trio to me. i looove how it plays w all three of their characters even if it isn't shown very well. it's also the basis for a lot of my interpretation of collei since it shows the extent of her beliefs/lack of belief. dear god..... it's so so good.

Idea for a story:

i've talked abt wt spin off au and windblume rewrite a bunch on this blog so let's go with amber and collei liyue trip!! :DD someone comes and tells amber they heard something about her grandfather in qingce while collei's in town and obv collei's like i can't hold you back on this! so they jsut decide to go together bc collei's packed a bag anyways and they're both adept w survival skills surely their different skills will come in handy for liyue. going to qingce leads them to going to yilong port (i'd do qiaoying but i feel like its too close) and amber's like. kinda stumbling w her broken canto-mando and feeling weirdly emotional and she and collei both bond w "coming back" to a generational homeland while feeling like a stranger and its an important moment to both of them bonding as friends and a pivitol point of collei changing her idea of amber as a savior as more of amber as a best friend yk :''). also ga-ming....... i don't know if he'll stay for long bc honestly i do want it to focus on amber and collei but i think it'd be fun for him to at least make an appearance or sm yk!! the narrative there could be so compelling.

Favorite relationship:

........................okay yeah obv it's amber and collei aksjbdkbsdja BUT. her and cyno are a close second :]

Favorite headcanon:

SNAKE MOMENT. i have a moment in my wt spin off au where she tends to a snake in spite of a phobia of them and it's representative of her first step towards healing AND her caring for her younger self even if she's still wrapped in so much hatred of her. also trans (she/her) lesbian.

Xiao:

First impression:

he's so sad :(( i want him please come home.... he has so so much heart and he doesn't even know it because of his own grief and guilt and objectification of himself :(( he's bruce-coded FUCK.

Impression now:

MAKES ME VIOLENT. i love him so so bad i miss him all the time. his story is soooo entangled with grief and acceptance and every little step he takes reflects that. he's such a fun character bc it's kinda a study on what comes after the tragic hero's story yk? except the tragedy is in part because he lives! he feels so so much and has such a big hear tbut denies it any priority bc it's easier not to. :((

Favorite moment:

PERILOUSWS TRAILS CUTSCNEe......... MY GOD. DERA GHODDD. FUCK. it makes me so so sick in the head that entire quest. xiao so readily sacrificing himself for the others because it's his duty to and because its what all his loved ones did. him closing his eyes and accepting it and finding comfort in the fact that he knows what happened to bosacius and that he's following his footsteps. him being saved and being surprised but That being such a key moment to his grieving process. also the poem from the waterborne poetry event :'') (aka the only part of that event that matters). it referencing all of the yakshas :'''''') and talking of him missing them

Idea for a story:

i don't have an actual story w xiao in mind... i would loooove to see another story quest w him and the other adepti though :''') i wanna see him in the past so so bad :C

Favorite relationship:

him and zhongli! :] they're both characters whos stories are about grief but both have different timelines to it and i think that's so so interesting especially when you remember how zhongli showed no emotion during the archon war and how his depart from his duty was his final stage of grief (acceptance) whereas xiao plunged himself into duty and emotional repression as a means to cope with all the grief and guilt and pain that he feels.

Favorite headcanon:

i think the wangshu inn staff gives him li xi sometimes and he's just like "i am literally older than you please stop i have no need for this" but he keeps it anyways. they have a small room saved for him at all times just in case he ever wants it (he never takes it but he appreciates it). <- its small bc he'd die if it was an open space.

[n3ssier]

hi! i noticed your taking requests! could you write a glaz x reader fic where the reader collects vintage slavic collectibles? maybe soviet things if that helps spark some ideas! what would glaz's reaction be to this?1

OF COURSE!! TYSM FOR REQUESTING

okay this might be terrible, its like my first post here and also bc i dont know glaz too well, so if theres something wrong pls let me know and ill gladly rewrite for ya!!! also i hope this is what u meant by the vintage items n stuff 😭😭💞💞

the clock reads 2am, and for some reason beyond your restless mind, you just cant sleep. you roll over in your shared bed to see timur asleep beside you, maybe his soft snores were the culprit to your lack of sleep, or maybe you just shouldn’t have had so much sugar only 2 hours before.

after admiring your sleeping boyfriend enough to make you feel warm, you decide to get up and find something to do. walking over to the desk and drawers not far from the bed, turning on the dim lamp as you reach into a drawer and pull a small box lined with protective bubble wrap. you open the box with a small sense of pride, talking out the contents to admire and thinking about what to spend time finding and acquiring next. 

by now, timur has noticed your lack of presence in the previously warm bed. you turn slightly and look over your shoulder to see him getting up to approach you. “what are you up to at this time, любимая?” he asks in that groggy sleep-ridden voice that you love. he stands behind you as he rests his hands on your shoulders and looks over you at your collection on the table, revealing a group of vintage slavic collectables, the first few he notices are a trinket/jewellery box, a military compass, a small group of russian dolls (CUTEE) and a watch.

“do you like it?” you ask slowly, while watching his face unsurely as he studies the objects on the table. “i like it very much, do you collect these, любимая?” to which you reply “yep!”. timur tilts his head to look over at you and smiles softy, before asking “in that case, would you like me to take you out this weekend and find more to grow this collection? on the one condition that you go to sleep with me just now, as it’s very late and i’d rather you not be tired at work.” you agree to him and he places a gentle kiss on your temple before leading you back to bed.

[astraystayyh]

hi love! how are you doing? i hope everything is okay<3

i wanted to ask if you could maybe share any tips on how to write longer fics? i'm planning on writing something longer for my blog but i'm kind of struggling with putting everything together and i thought maybe you could give me a helping hand<3

ofc you don't have to answer it if you don't feel like it !!

anyway, have a nice day/night lovely<3

hiii baby!!!! ill tell you how i usually write longer fics and i hope it'll help :')

first, i have an idea (shocking i know ajshs) and then i try to make a draft of the fic's summary with the main parts i want, let's take invisible thread as an example : i had in mind the main trope which is rivals to lovers and the fact that mc has a bad rp with her mom, then i thought of the ending scene and how i wanted them to confess, then i started thinking of main scenes/settings i wanted to include, such as them celebrating her coming top of her class & the scene where mc found minho under the rain.

then i start writing the start of the fic, i usually tend to kind of set the mood with it. in invisible thread i started with yn's past and her relationship with her mom, which would explain why she took academic rivalry to heart. in volcano it was the first time someone called mc sensitive and how that would tie to the entire story, etc.. just something to set the premise and start building your character with.

right, talking of characters!! i always try to give my characters particular traits that would shape how they act, and then throughout the fic throw in reminders/clues as to why they acted a certain way. just traits that would make them seem more human and relatable to the reader. u can either reveal the reason behind their behavior at first or just reveal it in the end to keep the suspense & make the climax more intense.

don't feel pressured to write the story in a chronological order!! most of the time i start with the introduction of the fic, the ending, then the main scenes in the middle. then i sit down and im like.. mmm how do i connect all of this.. and i add all the scenes that tie everything together. just to tell you that u don't have to be inspired right away.

also if u have an idea for a dialogue, u can build around it! that's usually what i do, if i have a line in mind i set it down first then i try to think of the circumstances that might lead character A or B to say said line.

mmmm what else, something i love about longer fics is that it leaves you the opportunity to draw parallels!! you can hint at smtg in the beginning and then make it unfold in the end. you can show the growth in the rp by writing different reactions to the same situation (for example, opening up more easily when they used to bury their feelings, no longer running away from physical touch, etc etc)

also my advice would be to just write!!! had some scenes in mind for echoes of love but ended up not writing them because i was inspired differently while writing, also the first draft of my fics is 99% of the time BAD and rushed, but that's the point of a draft, you can write and rewrite until you are satisfied.

also something that just came to my mind is show not tell. instead of writing that A is sad, show us that A is sad because they're behaving differently, or by describing their demeanor or eyes or the way their voice shook. just go that extra step to make the writing more captivating!!

i hope this helped bb,, im not an expert AT ALL in writing longer fics but i hope u'll get smtg out of my experience :') writing is really just a trials and errors process you can't get it right from the go, don't be discouraged and keep writing! if u have any more specific questions im here<333

[matcha-writer]

Yours Truly, Jack the Ripper

Story Theme: Mature

Word Count: 1780

Chapters: 1, 2, 3

A/N: I had this chapter sitting for a while now, but I wasn't satisfied what I wrote. So after a couple of rewrites later, it is here! I'm sorry for not uploading sooner and I hope you enjoy this read!

______________________________________________________________

Ch. 4: Somber, Mischief, Gratitude

______________________________________________________________

It’s dark once we finish our shift. I close the front door as Carla waits for me. The chilly wind creeps inside my sleeves as we walk in the dark lonely streets of Whitechapel. A couple of drunkards roam around the pub as others are knocked out in the alleyways. Three women pass by us, hoping to get a customer for the night. We huddle close together and in the corner of my eye, I see Carla observe our surroundings with caution. She pulls my arm closer to her as two tall men walk in front of us.

I turn to Carla, sensing her worry but she doesn’t say anything.

The two men turn to an alleyway, whispering to one another as we pass by them. She lets go of my arm and hugs her shawl to her body. Carla quietly calls my name.

“Have you heard of the illness that’s spreading east of here?”

I shake my head.

“From what Grisha told me, it’s something he’s never seen before. People are getting chest pains, coughing up blood at times, and oftentimes have trouble breathing. And there are new cases everyday. They call it the “King’s Evil”.’

I lick my cold chapped lips, “What does Grisha think about all this?”

“He thinks that the disease is spreading from person to person in close proximity. He believes that children have a higher mortality rate once they have it.”

My eyes widen at the Carla’s information, “You’re not telling me this because Eren is infected with it, are you?”

“No, no. Eren is healthy and has shown no symptoms of this new disease.”

I sigh in relief, “Okay, that’s good. Hopefully we can live through it when it inevitably passes by.”

I shiver as the wind runs by as I hug Levi’s cloak closer to my body. It seems like this district never takes a breather. Epidemic after empidemic we are always struggling to make it through the next hour, let alone day. Thievery, ransoms, and murders happen every time. No one can earn a bearable amount of income without committing illegal dealings or selling yourself to strangers. Carla idly talks to me regarding to Eren, today’s customers, and the upcoming holidays. 

“Are you celebrating the holidays with anyone this year?”

Three people pop up immediately in mind. Joy and warmth spreading throughout the apartment as everyone eats a delicious meal around the small table. Then another three people — no, a family — show up at the entrance. Talk and laughter fills the atmosphere as everyone celebrates. A redhead playing with a little boy. Light gray-eyed youth drinking with a bespectacled dad. The doctor’s wife conversing with the undercut ravenhead. Sweet and savory aromas invade the small quaint dining room.

“You know how it is with me. I just sit inside my home and read. Unless you have something in mind?” I answer her, warming up my hands to my mouth. A gleam shines in her eyes.

“Come to my place to celebrate. I noticed that people now-a-days aren’t in a festive mood ever since and I want to change that. You know what people say, ‘the more, the merrier.’”

I hum in response, detecting her underlying message, “Sure, but wouldn’t that attract unwanted attention? Like you said the other day you want me to be “safe and alive.” Isn’t that the opposite of what you are doing?”

Carla sighs and glares at me, not holding back.

“No, it isn’t. The situation is different. That time you were by yourself and he’s a drunkard who wouldn’t know how to count to ten. You don’t need to handle this alone anymore. This time I will be there as well as Grisha and your friends. Gross can’t do anything as long as we are there.”

My eyes widen at her revelation. I knew that Carla can be stubborn and protective, but not to this extent. Her determined eyes pierce through mine, unwavering. She really does care about me.

I avert my eyes and fiddle my fingers.

“Well, if you don’t mind the intrusion.”

Her hand clasps around mine catching my attention once more. It feels as if she can see my deepest secrets. Her hand gently squeezes mine.

“Don’t underestimate our friendship. No matter what happens I’ll be there. If you get a paper cut, I’ll bandage it. If something is amiss and it’s three in the morning, come knocking at my door. If you fall sick, I’ll send Grisha to your door. If Gross makes his way to you once more, just say the word; I’ll run him over and leave him in a ditch. You don’t have to do this alone.”

My lips tremble. For as long as I can remember, I never had someone who truly cared about me. From time to time, I’ve always wondered if my friends would care if something were to happen. Hearing her say out loud slowly cracks through my mask; pieces of it falling down the endless chasm, never to be found. 

 I squeeze her hand in return, timidly smiling at her.

“Thank you.”

Carla pulls me into a sisterly hug.

“You are too nice for your own good. And that upsets me sometimes.” She whispers gently.

 After a minute, we pull away and resume our walk with somber and gratitude walking alongside us. Trying to lighten up the mood, Carla talks to me about the details when suddenly a man emerges from the underground stairs. A white cloth is tied on his neck. A black top hat adorning his head, wisps of blond hair peaking out. A brown trench coat nicely wrapped around him, protecting the cold autumn night. A tall, slender man accompanies him from behind, holding a suitcase. The dimly lit street lamp illuminates his frame as he heads in our direction.

“Good evening ladies.”

We reply back. As the gentlemen passes by, Carla nudges me gaining my attention once more. I turn to look at her and see her smirking at me. Her mood suddenly changes. Mischief replaces somber.

“What? Why are you looking at me like that?” I question her.

She darts her eyes to the cloak hung around me and back to my eyes, her smirk slowly growing. “So…where did you get this new cloak?”

I unconsciously tug the cloak to my face, looking away and trying to cover the growing heat of her implication.

“...You know, around.”

“Hmm. Around as in shopping? Or just randomly found it lying in the streets one day?”

No response. Carla playfully nudges my shoulder, her smirk evergrowing.

“Did a someone lend it to you? Or did they give it for you to keep it?”

No response. Suddenly, my face feels hot. I dig my face deeper onto the cloak hoping I can become invisible from her teasing.

“Is it a certain short, black haired man?” She playfully quirks.

I don’t answer her, confirming her suspicions.

Carla giggles at my behavior. If there was ever a moment when I wanted to hide, it was now. Her smirk now transforms into a gleeful smile as she begins to gush over.

“It is! Goodness gracious you should’ve told me you were close to him! When did you two get together?! How is he like? Is he a sweet, hopeless romantic? Or a smug, rowdy man who knows his stuff? Oh you have to tell me every single detail that happened and—,” my eyes widen and dismisively wave my hands at her. I don’t want her to get the wrong idea about my relationship between Levi and I. I can’t ever imagine Levi being a hopeless romantic, much less an experienced one.

“No no! It’s nothing like that!” I interrupt her before she misunderstands any further. “He just let me borrow his cloak for the cold. There’s no romantic relationship going on between Levi and I. We are just friends.”

It’s almost comical how fast Carla’s face fell at my clarification. An eyebrow is raised and she looks as if she is ready to scold at me.

“Really. Just friends.”

I nod, not trusting my words. She sighs in disappointment as we finally arrive to my apartment. As I unlock the door, Carla begins talking again.

“Honestly, I thought you two were finally together. Not only one, but both of you are apparently too oblivious to know each others feelings.”

Fatigue seeps in through my bones as I turn and look at her.

“It’s not as easy as you make it out to be. I’m not experienced enough to know what it is to be in a relationship or know what he thinks most of the time. Remember how you felt when you were around Grisha before dating? How you were afraid and confused of your own feelings, and didn’t know?”

She nods.

“That’s how I feel right now. I don’t want to mix my feelings up with my desires. I don’t what to hurt myself or him in the end.”

Carla sighs in resignation. She hugs me, comfort spreading like the summer rays.

“Alright, you have a point. Take your time figuring it out. Do not overthink and blur the lines of friendship and romantic feelings. Let it take its course and see what happens. I’m always going to stand by you regardless of the outcome.”

“Since when did you become the almighty wise sage?” I jokingly smile as I hug her back. When I need her the most, she always knows the right words to say. We pull away and gesture her into my apartment.

“Stay the night at my place. It’s almost three and it’s not safe for you to go back alone.”

Carla shakes her head. “I would love to, but you know how it is. Motherhood and all of that fun stuff.”

Now it’s my turn to glare, “You just told me to be safe the other day and now you are doing exactly what you told me not to do?”

Carla sighs, “I know, I know but Grisha is leaving early morning and Eren will be by himself if I stay.”

Butterflies nervously fly within my belly. I hold my gaze for what feels like minutes before relenting.

“Alright. Walk back home safe and alive.” I emphasize.

Carla rolls her eyes and ruffles my head messing up my hair. “Don’t worry, I am always careful around these parts. You keep forgetting that I have worked the night shift longer than you have. Besides I should be the saying that to you.”

She begins walking out of the the courtyard. Before she completely disappears from my sight, Carla looks back at me once more.

She waves goodbye before disappearing into the night.

[eatinurgutz]

oh my dear im so sorry it didn’t send. i can rewrite it. 🤍 hello my dear. happy birthday. have a wonderful day. hopefully this letter will slightly brighten your day.

i love your attention. it is absolutely addicting, my love. i wish i could just talk to you forever.. i wish you were always with me. that we were never apart… 🤍 a job sounds fun. :) please take care of yourself though, i want to make sure you don’t overwork yourself. the idea of you loving me more once you find who i am is .. enticing. i hope you are right. for my sake.. im so glad you like talking to me, that brings me so much joy.

i would love if you could take me away.. you wouldn’t even have to pamper me or anything. you could keep me in a small cage, and as long as i got to see you every day, id be happy. 🤍 i would wait for you every day like an obsessed puppy. i crave you so deeply.. some days, i feel like im going crazy. ^^;

you’re opening up to me? oh my goodness, that makes me so happy! 🤍 im so glad i can be a comforting place for you, at least at times.. that brings me so much joy. i will definitely stay strange.. i dont enjoy being “normal”. i would absolutely love to have you at my side at all times … 25/8 🤍 i love talking to you. makes my heart flutter.

oh don’t write for me my dear.. i should be the one doing it for you! but if you insist.. i can’t deny that i would absolutely melt. 🤍 my black cat .. oh that’s so romantic 🤍 again, don’t worry too much about giving me anything. as long as you give me even a smidgen of attention, i will be happy.

id say i prefer pink and white. i am a very fem person :) id honestly recommend watching the entirety of legally blonde the musical. it is one of my favorites. also, im glad you were able to listen to some phantom .. it is so wonderful. i love opera in general 🤍 im glad i can be a first for you then, my dear. im a big musical theatre nerd, in all honesty. thank you for staying safe.

i love you. i love you i love you i love you. thank you so much for talking to me. it’s so hard to stop myself from thinking about you.. so i wont. 🤍 i hope you will respond soon my dear.

your coco, all yours ☕️

It's okay, love. Don't be sorry. :) it has brighten my day very much, brighter than the sun! 🤍 I love giving you my attention, i love when YOU give me attention. . . I do wish we could talk forever also. . . I think that would make my days better and make my life feel worth living, Because i would have you. 🤍 Even then, talking to you when i can is just as good. I enjoy our moments and i shall savour them inside my mind, heart and soul. <3 Yes, it does sound fun. Don't worry, if i do get one, I'll try my best to not stress or over-work. But, Hopefully i would be able to give you gifts. . . Even if i couldn't send them right away, i would keep them inside big boxes until i could. I would wait just for you, my dearest coco. :3 Whoever you are, try not to over think about when you reveal yourself, alright? I'm not sure why you do think i wouldn't love you anymore anyways. . . It breaks my heart. :( but if i have to reassure you every minute, every hour, every day, every week. . . I will. Just for you, dear. I love love talking to you, i truly do. You make me feel whole, coco. 🤍‼️ a small cage for you would be adorable. . . But i would have to decorate it. To make it extra special for my baby. <3 At times, i also feel I'm going crazy for you. . . But that's fine with me. ^_^ Yes, i am opening up to you! 🤍 And what ever you wanna know, just ask. I won't mind! Normal is boring, anyways. . . Let's be strange together, dear! We can write for each other, but ill probably write more. . . >:) ehehehe. Yes, I'll be your black cat and I'll protect you from the other cats. . . As you are mine. . . I'll give you every. single. drop. of my attention! 🤍 Hmm, alright!!! I can be your red and black to your pink and white. . . ♡ mwhehehe. . . I'll try watching it for you, dear. :) And maybe one day we can watch an opera together. <3 Just me and you. Then we can go for dinner, and I'll buy you whatever you want. <333 You're welcome, dear. . . I'll try to stay safe as much as i can! I love you too, i love you too, i love you too! I'll always talk to you, when i can, my dear. I can't wait to talk more and more and more. . . <3 I love talking to you so much! You make everything better. I never wanna be without you, coco. I want to be glued to your side. I want to be inside of your heart forever and ever and EVER. You could use my teeth as rings, my bones as necklaces. I'll rip out my heart and give to you, bloody and all. I want to follow you everywhere. . . No matter where you went, i would follow! Like a lost puppy, YOUR lost puppy.

─ forever and ever, my lovely coco. . . From nik. 🤍

[uselessdancedata]

If you want to know, I really don’t like MBA because I feel like training is sub-par for it’s reputation, they prefer wins over creating employable dancers, they let Eva run rampant and do whatever she does, puts dancers on point too young and also they do not teach dancers proper etiquette in the studio or at comps. Oh and the fact that the culture there is so toxic and encourages EDs. I know a few people here aren’t dancers/don’t know a lot about ballet so I’ll try and keep it short (spoiler: I didn’t) and understandable to anyone who reads this. The training really sucks, the dancers don’t seem to be taught or corrected for their technical issues and the training provided to them is really sub par. They train around 26 hours a week and can’t even teach proper port de bras. All their dancers have glaring technical issues with turns, often they have issues with posture, core and arm placement. I don’t know why this is such a common issue but they also all bobble their turns very easily? Most MBA performances have turn bobbles. They also typically teach their dancers variations that really do not flatter them due to the lack of essential character/artistry/musicality/etc training. The main two they teach are Odette/Black Swan variation and La Esmeralda/Tamborine variation. Most of their dancers really struggle with character because I don’t believe they are taught about character/take classes on artistry and essential aspects of performance. It really shows when you have dancers in who can’t even do more than smile while performing *the* variation to perform, not just dance. Most of their dancers aren’t taught to dance in time in corps. Most of their dancers can’t even dance in time in duets. This is not all the dancers fault, their training really should provide a focus on this aspect as 90% of their dancers will never be soloists. Most employable dancers have to end up in corps. Not teaching the essential aspect of performing as a group really sets up their dancers for failure in a company. They also focus on wins wayyy too much. To the point where it impacts their training. They seem more focused on having 17 hope award winners rather than 17 employable dancers. I’ve noticed a trend with a few of their graduates where they’ll join a company for a year or two and in recordings you notice they struggle to keep in time and then they are let go. I personally think this is because mba creates soloists not employable dancers who can dance in sync. They aren’t taught enough about this because they are too busy learning Esmeralda (but not learning about the character)!! They also put dancers en pointe at age 8. I was the one who wrote the pointe essay a while back about the dangers of it so I’m not going to rewrite the whole dangers of pointe too young but basically your feet are at risk of development issues, permanent injuries and it proven to not make you a better/more advanced dancer.

okay you put this in multiple parts so i'll reply to them one by one! (sorry for the delay, school has been killing me)

everything you said in this part, i completely agree with. maybe it's a bitter outlook but i'm always kind of cynical towards studios/schools/institutions which put a lot of emphasis on social media branding (not just in the dance world, just in general). and with the context of mba being shady about eating disorders, mental illness etc, the whole eva nys thing comes across as really insidious. i don't necessarily think it started as a deliberate pay-for-views thing, i think eva and MBA's management just kind of symbiotically benefit from each other, but man i hate it anyway.

i also find myself so perplexed by their variation choices. i think that generally, they do have a running pattern of producing many dancers who lack stage presence or any kind of personality onstage, but often that's not just the school's fault and can just be a dancer's personality. i try not to judge because all the dancers are under 19 and do have time to develop after joining a company. (i don't like the idea that a dancer is done growing once they go from student to professional).

but man MBA really does not help this perception of themselves, because the variation choices seem so completely disconnected from the dancers' style and performance ability, it's crazy. sometimes they get lucky enough with a dancer like maya schonbrun who seems versatile enough to pull off anything, but most dancers are just...not like that. and it is so apparent with many of their dancers. MBA seems to choose variations exclusively by the technical skillset with no regard for "can this dancer pull off kitri/esmeralda/odile/etc?" and then apparently don't work on the character performance at all. last year one of their best/most famous dancers was assigned the odile variation for yagp finals and it was just...so sad to watch. because you know from the eva nys videos that she is very technically skilled, but as odile she just looks so juvenile because she doesn't even attempt to do swan arms, she stumbles over steps that she seems to do easily for social media, and the whole time there is just zero attempt to perform the character or dance to the music. it's just sad when you know what they can do and then they come out onstage and they do this, and they don't even qualify for finals despite being a social media superstar.

i could say more but i think you have said it all already. i know websites don't mean everything, but i think there is a stark difference between the curriculums of MBA and the Vaganova school (which i'm citing as an example because MBA claims to be a Vaganova school, which I don't see outside of, you know, springing up en pointe). of course there will be differences because Vaganova is classical and MBA is very competition-based, but you see so much more of preparation for a company in the Vaganova syllabus. those kids spend all eight years learning historical and character dances, their last year has a dedicated class towards learning all the famous corps dances from swan lake, giselle etc. not to mention the hours they spend in acting classes, learning to perform characters onstage. MBA has an equal amount of training hours per week as Vaganova but their time is not spent doing any of this. there is such little preparation for a professional life.

this is not to say that MBA will never produce an employable dancer (maya schonbrun seems to be doing very well for herself, though it's early days yet), and it's not to say that MBA is the only ballet school with these issues. the problem is way more widespread than that. but until the day MBA decides to stop taking over my youtube recommendations, they're going to remain the most prominent example of competition ballet culture gone rogue.