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tinyundercover · 6 months ago

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pepper & felix (one-shot)

instincts

It takes a long time for a borrower and a human to learn to trust each other. Even though Pepper trusts Felix more than anything, he is reminded occasionally just how drastic their size difference is.

🩷 you don't need to be familiar with these characters in order to read :) this takes place over the duration of the main story. word count: 1.9k

The hum of the air conditioning filled the air, the only noise aside from Pepper’s quiet footsteps. The kitchen counter always appeared long and foreboding at night, dimly lit, but Pepper had long grown accustomed to it.

He approached the fruit bowl, peering up at the small mound of apples and grapes, just barely peeking over the rim of the bowl. Felix had caught on quickly to the fact that Pepper enjoyed green grapes the most, and while the borrower felt a little shy to have his tastes be so openly considered by the humans, it warmed his heart.

After rolling his shoulders back in a stretch, Pepper tossed his hook up to the rim of the bowl. It wasn’t very high, and it only took him a few seconds to clamber up, shoes balancing delicately on the surface of an apple. Monotonously, Pepper tugged two grapes off of the vine and stuffed them into his bag. His regular borrowing trips to the kitchen counter were repetitive and, admittedly, a little boring.

Just as his boots hit the kitchen counter again, however, his dull schedule was flipped on its head. The light flicked on overhead.

Panic seized Pepper’s wrists, and before he could think properly he dodged behind the fruit bowl, skidding to a frozen halt.

He hadn’t even heard Felix approach. The reason why his borrowing trips took place at night was because, obviously, the average human was fast asleep.

Felix’s pause was detectable, and after a moment, his voice floated over the fruit bowl. “Pepper?”

His voice carried no frustration or disgust, only a vague confusion. Pepper blinked rapidly, hugging his hook closer to his pounding heart, before loosening his grip. What was he doing?

Despite his every instinct screaming at him to stay hidden, Pepper peeked around the edge of the fruit bowl, gray eyes sheepish.

Felix’s size never ceased to amaze him. The borrower looked up and up, meeting the human’s tired but concerned gaze. When Felix stepped closer, Pepper’s muted instincts jumped.

“What are you doing?” Felix asked gently, brow furrowed— but something in Pepper understood that Felix had an inkling of what was going on.

Thoroughly embarrassed, Pepper ducked his head, staring at his shoes. Despite Felix’s overwhelming size, the human had proven himself time and time again to be loving, patient, and trustworthy. Pepper had spent hours with him, laughing and relaxing and talking.

Silenced by his own apprehension, Pepper gestured to the fruit bowl. The apology lingered on his lips. Felix’s lashes fluttered.

“Hey,” he said softly, placing a large hand on the counter. Pepper’s gaze flickered to it, and he relaxed microscopically. “It’s fine, Pepper, you live here too.” He hesitated. “But— you know you don’t have to hide from me, right?”

He had clearly tried to keep the hurt out of his voice, but it trickled through. Pepper blinked up at him, heart skipping a beat.

Honestly, he couldn't explain his reasoning for ducking behind the fruit bowl. His body had reacted before his brain.

“I’m not—“ Pepper shook his head, desperate to explain himself. “I wasn’t intentionally hiding from you. You just startled me, and— I don’t know, I have instincts, I guess.”

Felix rested his elbows on the counter, shifting a little closer to his soulmate. “Instincts?”

“I— I mean, I’ve spent twenty-two years hiding from humans,” Pepper said, lips twitching into a nervous smile. “It’s not exactly a logical thing for me to hide from you, anymore, it’s just… The light turned on, and I was hiding before I could even think about it. It’s just wired in me.”

Understanding shone in Felix’s eyes, melting Pepper’s heart. “Oh,” Felix began, not unkindly. “I see. That… that makes sense.”

Pepper nodded, comfortably moving forward to rest a tiny hand on Felix’s finger. “Right. Don’t feel bad.”

——

Felix hated his professor.

The cranky old man was always shoving last-minute assignments at his students, which drove Felix up the wall, considering how much Felix liked to stay on top of his classes.

It was currently Wednesday evening, and while Felix was already winding down on his couch and scrolling social media, he received the email that his professor now expected an entire essay by Friday.

Annoyance lit up in his chest. He sat up straighter, swiping through the email, which laid out all of the expectations for the essay. It wasn’t going to be an easy one.

With a huff of annoyance, Felix shoved himself to his feet, tossing his phone aside. He had a pad of paper and some pencils in one of his kitchen drawers, and although it pissed him off, he might as well start outlining this stupid essay right away.

He stormed into the kitchen, and with more force than he intended, he wrenched open the drawer.

The thud and the yelp of surprise sent Felix’s heart spiraling down into his stomach, and he froze, suddenly very, very cold.

Among the cluttered array of supplies, a movement caught his eye. Pepper was laying on his back, draped over a mound of pencils, tiny chest heaving with shuddering breaths. Felix met his wide-eyed gaze.

“Woah— shit, I’m sorry.” Guilt tore him like wildfire, watching as Pepper’s panicked gaze crumpled into something more miserable, slowly sitting up among the pencils. “I— I didn’t know you were in there, I— fuck— are you hurt?”

In the few months that Felix had known him, he had never once encountered Pepper in this drawer— although when he saw the paper clips sticking out of his satchel, splayed on next to him, he supposed this drawer actually held a lot of useful items for a borrower.

Still, he felt clumsy and dangerous, watching anxiously as Pepper rubbed at his shoulder, clearly struggling to calm himself. With how quickly Felix had entered the kitchen and opened the drawer, Pepper must have been given quite the scare. Felix prayed that he was only scared and not injured.

To his relief, Pepper shook his head, running his hands over his arms as if to double check. His gray eyes peered up at the human, hesitant, but thankfully not terrified. “What was that all about?” He finally asked, wincing. Felix’s heart crumpled.

“Sorry.” Felix shook his head, hoping that his embarrassment wasn’t showing on his face. “I— I just needed a pen and paper, because I got this stupid assignment from this evil professor, and…”

He trailed off, observing Pepper’s owlish gaze. Felix wasn’t oblivious to the borrower’s apprehension. He had figured out on his own that Pepper specifically felt uncomfortable around angry humans, considering that a single thoughtless action fueled by anger could lead to a lot of pain for the borrower. As much as Felix hated the idea of hurting the borrower, he couldn’t deny that he was much more dangerous to the borrower when he was angry, as indicated by his wrenching of the drawer.

Felix exhaled, dropping his shoulders. “I’m sorry. I’m not… I’m just in a bad mood. It’s not your fault. Here… you want a hand?”

When he carefully set his hand down next to the borrower, Pepper eyed it, not unlike a bird might view a suspicious object. After only a second of hesitation, Pepper stepped into his palm, pulling his satchel closer to himself. “It’s okay,” he finally said, noticing Felix’s miserable expression. “I just fell over. It wasn’t that bad.”

Felix sighed, gently moving Pepper to the countertop, where the borrower scrambled off with a little too much gusto. “If I had known you were in there, I wouldn’t have— I wouldn’t have opened it so fast. I’m really sorry, again.”

It was a little sickening, honestly, to see how much his actions could affect the borrower. They both were incredibly lucky that Pepper hadn’t been hurt, and it made Felix’s stomach twist.

Glancing over Pepper’s small form, Felix swore to himself that he would be more cautious in the future.

——

The night had started off wonderful.

Pepper had been sitting on the arm of the couch, absentmindedly untangling his hook and thread. The thread had acquired quite a few knots over the weeks, and with Felix next to him as company, Pepper had set to work smoothing it out.

They had been chatting quietly, a movie playing as background noise. Felix’s hand rested only a few inches away from the borrower, a comforting reminder of his presence.

“This movie sucks,” Pepper teased, glancing between the screen and his thread. Felix snickered somewhere above him. “Can they just kiss already?”

“They need to build up to that,” Felix disagreed, amusement in his tone. “The movie would be two minutes long without the tension.”

“Well, maybe it should— oh!”

Pepper’s sentence was cut off by the jerking of his entire body, something instantly closing tight around his torso. Simultaneously, Felix’s hand moved somewhere beside him— and with a mindless surge of panic Pepper whirled around (tightening the pain around his chest even more) with his hook gripped tight in his fists, now a weapon.

Felix was frozen, wide blue eyes staring down at Pepper, and with a mixture of fear and confusion Pepper vaguely realized that he was currently brandishing his hook up at Felix, the man he had spent the last hour laughing and watching a movie with.

The world had gone still, but Pepper’s heart threatened to pound out of his chest, still constricted by something tight and painful. Felix’s hand wasn’t wrapped around the borrower, crushing him, like Pepper had subconsciously expected— but his thread seemed to have tightened around his chest at the same time the thread had looped around Felix’s finger.

“I— are you okay?” Felix began hesitantly, finally breaking the tense silence that had descended upon them. His worried voice sent Pepper’s shoulders slumping, and with a sheepish glance the borrower lowered his trembling hook.

The thread had tangled around Pepper’s chest without him realizing, and because of Felix’s small movement, the human had accidentally tightened the thread around both of them and tugged Pepper towards him. The unexpected action had startled both of them.

“Yeah, yeah,” Pepper forced out, releasing a nervous laugh. Felix had already removed the thread from around his finger, loosening the constriction around Pepper’s chest somewhat. “Shit, that— that surprised me. Sorry.”

Although the panic had already died down, Pepper couldn’t fight the uncomfortable thought of Felix snatching him up and squeezing him unexpectedly. Of course he knew that Felix would never, ever do such a thing— the thought was absurd, actually— but the fact that he had reacted so defensively made his stomach hurt. He hated the idea that he feared Felix, somewhere deep down. His heart sank.

However— Felix was already nudging the thread aside, gaze soft and focused. He didn’t acknowledge the fact that Pepper had weakly threatened him with his hook. Gentle fingers moved against Pepper’s torso, overwhelming but not intrusive, and after a few seconds the tightness around the borrower’s chest fell away. Felix had carefully tugged the thread loose.

“Here,” Felix murmured, gaze flickering briefly to Pepper’s face. The borrower sucked in an enormous, shaky breath, bringing a hand to his chest. “Sorry about that. I think that was my fault.”

Pepper blinked up at him, numbly stepping out of the circle of thread that had fallen around him. He lowered his hook down as well, then wrung his hands together, flushing. He felt silly for having reacted with such panic. “It’s okay— I shouldn’t have strewn the thread all over.”

Felix’s gaze lingered, hesitant. “Are you sure it’s okay?”

He had noticed Pepper’s panic, then. The borrower shuffled his feet, peering sheepishly up at his soulmate. “Yeah, I promise. Thanks, Felix.”

With a considerably larger breath, Pepper patted Felix’s hand, offering a warm smile. When Felix’s gaze softened and his finger glided along Pepper’s back, the borrower sank into his touch.

----

i hope you enjoyed!!! things were getting a little too chummy in the main story and i needed to scare pepper sorry fukcufkcnks

TAGLIST: @smallsday @compact-katrina @satethesatelite @taters169 @entomolog-t @gtzel @gt-newbie @da3dm @clumsiergiantess @vee-normous @fee-hunter @torakan @mabelisthebatman n @andithewhumper @mothsintherain @violetlight @heroofthe13thday @phoenix-on-the-run @houseboatmac @dav8530 @ididit-allofit-foryou @soakedmilkgt

#unintentional fearplay my beloved #wrote this in one sitting and edited it really fast so I apologize for any grammar mistakes #pepper & felix #g/t #giant/tiny #g/t writing #borrowers #g/t fearplay

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pepperf · 4 months ago

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Genuinely can't decide if the writers intended the Five and Lila relationship to be toxic, or if that's just their idea of romance - just like Rochester, Heathcliff, Darcy, and that dude from Twilight, right???

Okay, let's have a readmore. Note tags, ppl, and curate your experience.

Lila has a relatively sensible approach to relationships, which is consistent, despite her somewhat Machiavellian approach to getting what she wants out of them - she put Diego in his place about having realistic expectations back in s3. She's pretty clear about who she is and where her lines are drawn, and is "weirdly self-actualised", according to Klaus. And Five - romantically inexperienced, thinks everyone should do what he says at all times - tries to impose his notion of How This Should Go onto her, from nearly the start of their brief romance, but leaning hard into it once it starts going sour - which also checks out: he was alone for 45 years and his previous relationship was all in his head, giving him full control, so that's what he's used to. But I couldn't tell if they genuinely intended to show it as him being incredibly selfish in prioritising his feelings over her wishes, or if they honestly thought it was romantic. I mean, the barbed wire-style bracelet is a little on the nose, and there's some symbolism that I'll get into in a sec. Truthfully, I'm not inclined to give them the benefit of the doubt - I think SB at least thought it was hot, judging by what he's said about identifying with Five, and about how he finally gets to have a romance. This seems to have been his pet project for the season, blergh.

It's that tedious old misogynist chestnut, that all women secretly want A Man to take control. It's frustrating, because they already established that Lila likes to be in charge, she wants to be free to make her own choices, she'd already had twenty-plus years of being told what to think and do. And yet she has to remind Five, who really ought to know her better by now, "You do not get to decide what I do with my life!" It's also very disconnected from reality. It's not actually fun or sexy to be gaslighted, to be lied to by some insecure asshole who thinks they know better about what's good for you, that they have a right to stick their nose into your personal relationships or keep you away from your kids. Not cool, Five, not cool. He's lucky she didn't kick him in the nuts on the way out. But another reason I think they didn't do this consciously is that Five doesn't seem to realise his assholery - there's no hint that he's regretting anything other than being dumped.

Lila was trapped for seven years in an intense, claustrophobic situation with Five - and if they'd continued to exist, she could have worked through the feelings that come out of that. Like Ritu said, of course there's going to be love there: they've spent seven years together, on the run. If nothing else, it would be a matter of survival - either you find a way to get along, or you kill each other. And they went in with a fair amount in common already (although being adopted by the Handler at age four is not at all the same as being recruited by her at age fifty-something). So I'm annoyed that Lila's whole arc this season is one of frustration about having to be the grown up in her relationship, taking a break to reassess, going off to do something a bit crazy and fun - and promptly getting stranded with someone considerably less emotionally competent.

Okay, I'm being somewhat harsh - Lila unexpectedly getting the timeout she wanted could've been a decent storyline, she could have some time to reflect, live the child-free life without consequences, and have some adventures (she actively enjoys danger!). And she and Five got to bond, that had lots of interesting potential, especially with their complicated history. But it tipped over from being a potential opportunity into an immensely over the top punishment for her impulsivity, and took them so far from where they'd started that there's a total emotional disconnect with the main story. Which is a fucking weird choice for one episode in such a short season, ngl.

And then, ugh, she's right back to dealing with the apocalypse, visibly thrown by a Diego who has unexpectedly thought about what she said and is trying to be a better husband, and dealing with a Five who has decided to get territorial. It's deeply uncomfortable, Five is gearing up to start trouble, so wrapped up in his own hurt feelings that he's functionally useless for the actual problem in front of them - leaving Lila to deal with the mess he creates, and then leverage said feelings to get him to put on his big boy pants and help. She still reaches out to him in the end, I think she knows him well enough by this point to understand what makes him tick...and she's having to be the sensible one up to the end of her existence. Can't she have someone who's willing to meet her halfway? The reflecting that Diego did, him making a start on making amends (given that it was only a few hours for him, that's about as much as they could squeeze in) was basically just wasted. They start to reconnect at the end, and mutually apologise for the damage they've done - but that's all they get, and it's a travesty.

Personally I think the whole storyline should have been cut, but if - if - they really felt it added something, they could have given it some time in the real world, see how this shaky new romance holds up against a serious relationship that's been massively fractured. In a different show, that might have been a fine story. But they don't do that. Whatever she might have wanted, Lila doesn't get time to even think about her choices. She gets to stop existing. (Or they could just have not gone there in the first place, god I hate love triangle plotlines, they do no favours for anyone involved!)

Given a continued existence in which to do so, I'm sure Five would have moved on pretty quickly. It's his first romance with a real person, he feels it intensely - but once the dust settled, he'd see that they were in very different emotional places (she wanted to get back to her family, the break from reality is way overdue to end - and he wanted to stay in their little bubble and leave all that behind). The actual romance part was actually pretty brief, and lacking in any deep communication - as Lila says, it wasn't real. They're playing house in an attempt to feel normal - in a greenhouse (a fragile structure, not a real home), eating strawberries (a treat more than real sustenance), like children...hey, maybe I'm wrong and the writers DID intend to do that, bc that's some choice visual metaphors. And they're playing roles: all their normal antagonism - what made them so fun and sparky in previous seasons, and even during the earlier part of their adventure! - disappears. Lila is a chameleon, taking on a character is her happy place - and this was how Five kept himself going, last time he was in this situation, so he's slipping back into that method of survival (although he's not as good as she is at separating reality from fiction). So while all that is totally understandable, it's insubstantial. If Five had the space to do some self-reflection, or if one of his more rational siblings (Luther maybe, or...um...or a friend, if he can make one...or maybe that dude in the Losers Department at the CIA...) sat down with him and explained that you need to treat a partner as an equal, maybe he could do better next time - or double down and keep being an asshole, that's also a strong possibility.

idk - I still don't honestly think the show intended it that way, unfortunately. I think they shoehorned the characters into the scenes they wanted, regardless of sense or even plot requirement. There are a LOT of badly-explained or badly-thought out moments in this season, and this whole mess just adds to the incoherency. Or maybe it's just a consequence of TV - you get multiple creative people involved, and the reasoning gets muddied, especially over time. Maybe it was SB's intention from the start, but he didn't inform the actors until the final season, so they've been playing it straight.

This show has an...interesting tendency to do something that you think is totally unacceptable and just gloss over it at the time, and then address it next season (like Luther apologising to Viktor), as if the writers all brought it up in their respective therapy sessions during the break, and worked through the issues - so maybe if they'd had another season, they would have gone into all that. Maybe. But we're clearly not going to get that, and they're all gone from existence so I can't headcanon that in this universe, they eventually sort it out. So I'm putting it down to one thing:

Break out the dodgy facial hair (I see you're ahead of me, Five) and let's get kicking babies!

#tua s4 #tua #the umbrella academy #five hargreeves #lila pitts #anti-fivela #pepper gets salty #there are currently 3 hours left on that poll but I don't think the result are gonna change #I would've posted this yesterday in fact but then I made myself go watch some of the scenes in question 🤢🤢🤢#and had some edits to make

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