#'you sound very nice are you single' 'im having a lovely time chatting with you are you single' shoot your shot king

[vitamin-zeeth]

Joe lycett constantly flirting with the people they bring in every now and again for tasks is iconic I love it

[coffeegnomee]

I wanted to write about how far Zam has come with his character for like a week now and now he’s acknowledged it himself so I finally grabbed all the quotes.

Let’s go down memory lane shall we? 

DAY 1 

24:00 “There’s a ghost that haunts my dreams [...] I see him in my sleep. He tells me to kill people. But I don’t want to kill anyone”

“I have to hold it in.. [...] I wish I had like horror sound effects to play and images of every lifesteal member dead and I could flash them across the screen” does that. 

ZAM: “*lights armadillo on fire* “give it a slow, painful death” PENTAR: “for someone against the whole idea of killing, you seem to have a gruesome way around killing things.” ZAM “I’m still me” [armadillo dies.] “I can only resist the urges so much [evil giggle]”

10:07:00 after Pentar kills him “It’s not about being above anyone by not killing people, I would just prefer not to. Because last season I feel like I was.. Something else. And I don’t want to do that again. I don’t want to be that again. You know?”

“Because it’s not supposed to be some morality, ‘I’m better than you’ kind of thing, you know? I don’t want to be on some like high horse. It’s more of like, I just don’t wanna let the demon out, you know, that type of thing”

Reflecting on the first two days, I wrote this about Zam: This season looks like an internal battle of his personal desire to complete a minecraft challenge™ (no kills) vs his desire to do lore and change his character multiple times. And I just don’t think the challenge wins long term. A challenge isn’t what makes him love lifesteal, it’s the lore. 

Day 4 7/9/24

1:01:05 “‘zam has no enemies’ no, it’s not that I have no enemies, it’s just that if I kill people, I’m going to become like a monster. Like way worse than anyone else on the server. You know? And I like don’t want that reputation if I’m like just peacefully building. [...] ‘oh bro’s scared to hurt others then?’ yup! [...] ‘bad things will happen…. (meep)’ yea last time I hurt someone, last time i tried to hurt someone, bad things happened. And i just… can’t do that again, you know?”

1:21:40 killing bogged in trial chamber. “It feels nice cutting things down, I don’t think I’ve been doing enough of this. [...] I’m going to kill all of you, I’m going to kill every single one of you. [...] is it weird to say that I’ve missed this? Even though ‘this’ is just cutting down a bunch of skeletons, just jumping up and down and left clicking [...]  [evil giggles (and not to anything in chat)] [...] my sword might say “im so sorry’ but I’m not sorry, I’m not even a little sorry right now” 

2:19:05 “”also Zam is emo’ (chips) “no i’m not! I’m so happy! I’m the happiest i've been in a long time. That’s why I have my nipple out. That’s not true why did i say that” 

4:04:50 Wemmbu killed Spoke. ZAM: “[opens statistics] it still says zero. It still says zero. It still says zero it still says zero. So I’m fine. I’m fine. Cause it still says zero.. [walks around base] I’m fine. It’s perfectly fine. ‘0 plants potted’ (arch) okay actually that’s what I got the clay for so.. Thank you for saying that actually, very convenient timing. [goes to shed to smelt] [blows out breath] I’m just gonna chop down trees. I’m just gonna chop down trees and I’m just gonna leave this group and I’m gonna chop down trees and I’m gonna have a fun time and nothing bad’s gonna happen. And everything’s gonna be a-okay [hannah logged on] I thought Mapicc logged on I cannot lie. Okay maybe I’m scared. [Mapicc logs on] [gasp, crouches] motherfucker. Motherfucker [under breath]”

Dies to Mapicc three times. 

5:26:00 is thinking about how he’s doing a character nobody else on lifesteal has done before. Puts on a lore song. “‘If there’s one thing you’ve been consistent in the last two seasons, it’s been steady in your morals until the end’ (chips) yea. But here’s the thing though [giggle] does it matter? Or like, what’s it called. Am I restricting myself? Do you guys think? Most definitely, right. And it’s like. I dunno, a big part of me feels like it would be nice to like, let go, and just like, join in on all the violence, and everything, and all that stuff. You know? Like it would be nice. It would be nice, I think. Maybe. Maybe not, I don't know… [evil giggle] ahhh. [long pause, arch in chat said ‘once you do it you can’t go back though’ he doesn’t read it out] [lore music cuts out] [very seriously] no that’s stupid. No. I’m not gonna. I’m not gonna. [blows breath] I’m not gonna let myself go as far as I did last season. I’m not gonna let myself do anything like that again [tehe giggle] [huffs out breath]”

5:28:18 “‘it was fun tho’ (chips) it was, but it was fun at the expense of others. It was fun… but it was damaging to the server.. It was. I dunno. I don’t think it’s who I want to be. I don’t think I was born to be…That. you know? I don’t know. I feel like that’s not who I am. I feel like that was never who I was.” 

7/13/24 end fight day 

~2:38:00 ZAM: “‘its not ok to kill people but it's ok to ask people really nicely to kill people you don't like’ I’m allowed to persuade people’s opinions, I think, and I can only do that when I’m really really mad. [...] But i dunno. [sigh] I’ve messaged both opposing teams so i dunno, I don’t care enough though. Whatever. This is beyond me."

“Joker zam went back into his closet’ (meep) that’s true. I was possessed for a second there. [messages MC chat saying that] ‘my evil self wishes for me to kill everyone. I won’t tho.' 

7/14/24 day he kills planet

Hour and half of Pangi messing with him while he gets more and more frustrated at the shulker farm. 

1:28:50 Zam flies after Pangi and crits him out, but he stops. “I can’t crit him out like that, I’m gonna get my first player kill and it’s gonna ruin all my lore” 

1:40:00 pangi is still singing, Zam bows him, then tries fishing rodding him. He comes up the farm PANGI: “hey PrinceZam, do you need therapy?” ZAM: “shut up you always got some noise to make, shut up. [...] I bet you’re my first kill this season” PANGI: “BAHAHAA” ZAM: “just kidding I won’t kill anyone. Just kidding. Just kidding just kidding. That was a joke. That was a joke. I won’t kill anyone. [blows out breath]” PANGI: “okay PrinceZam.” 

1:47:00 ZAM: “what the fuck just happened to me. Dude, I need to stop. He keeps, he keeps trying to get me to get my first kill, bro. He’s trying to get me to get my first kill. I can’t. I can’t do it. I can’t do it. It’s getting harder and harder, with each and every day, to hold back [sigh] oooh kay. ‘Why aren’t you killing anybody’ because as soon as I kill one person, I go down a dark dark path. And you don’t want to see that dark dark path. ‘WE DO’ I don’t. K fine, maybe you do. I don’t. A great darkness lurks within me. A great darkness lurks within me. It’s consumed me, ever since, ever since I was young. ‘Your dark side is banging on the door, let the poor guy in’ no. noo. I’m gonna build a closet in my house. ‘PLEASE DO IT’ where could I even, oh I know where I could actually build a closet right now, let’s do that right now actually hold on. Unironically lets do that right now” 

6:24:44 zam goes to bacon in his base, “Whenever I sleep, he comes to me. So i try not to sleep in that bed anymore” BACON: “[baffled] how did that even start. Like how did you even, what, how did this even become a thing in your head” ZAM: “[ignoring] there’s a demon in my closet, any time, any time I die he comes closer to possessing me.” BACON: “okay what is the demon trying to get you to do.” ZAM: “kill everyone” BACON: “oooohhh. Oh I like that. Okay okay” ` 

Then there’s the fated Bacon stream 

2:39:00 bacon and planet meme around about the build battle rules and Zam snaps, “if you want to be a bitch about it you don’t have to fucking play, goddamm. Dumbass fucking planetlord and baconnwaffles. I hate both of you. Fuck you guys. I’m going back into the house… i’m going into my closet” 

They clean up spawn a bit, he comes back out swinging at them. Then goes on top of the lighthouse and starts shooting them from a distance. 

Planet takes off all his armor and pops like a grape.

Then on Spep’s stream he stalks Spep around to the End islands, generally just looks really threatening. Says he won’t remember this when he wakes up, but Spep will. 

7/15/24 

~14:00 ZAM: “[strained] dude, pangi I killed planet” PANGI: “[strained too]I know. Hey, it wasn’t your fault” ZAM: “i shouldn’t have even had a bow” 

He builds the tree and writes his first oath 

In the first draft he wrote “I cannot do anything that goes against the interest of the entire server”

he changed “entire server” to “majority of players” to “most players” 

And changed “attack any player” because chat went crazy about him not being able to punch anyone, to “kill any other players” 

7/18/24 

Flame and mapicc start fighting

22:40 ZAM: “dude I did give mapicc a heads up there, I can’t lie. [realizing] I’ve been playing all sides, I can’t lie. This is interesting. I’m just chummy with everyone, I dunno, i don't do it intentionally. I do it a little intentionally, i can’t lie, but not like, intentionally”

33:20 ZAM: “I really don’t like the idea of playing both sides, but like, like- I’m trying my hardest not to, [...] Like if you shove 100 dollars in my face like I’m probably gonna take it right? Like like [giggling], it’s just like, ugh, it’s so stupid [laughing] i don’t like this. I don't know, I’m opportunist I guess. I’m just an opportunist I guess because I'm pacifist and I don't wanna die." So. But like also I really just don’t like the idea of being someone who plays both sides, it’s so awkward” while watching the fight from a distance. "

7/20/24 

From 2:43:00 to 3:15:00 hops between group chats and instinctively gets information and relays it to everyone else. Actually just leaks every word he hears lol. 

4:51:10 “imagine flame goes on a killing spree just so he can pay you to make more builds lol’ (citrus) dude. Is the blood on my hands then? That’s something I was wondering, what if this becomes bad. To where they’re like murdering people just for the sake of like, whats it called, paying me. ‘Yes you're evil then’ (sin) aw shit. It’s my fault. I mean I guess it depends on how bad it gets. I felt really bad when they killed jepex for me. I can’t lie, in the moment I thought it was really funny but looking back, it’s literally the same as like. Like I think me asking them to kill someone is the same as me killing them myself, it lowkey does not matter. So I’m lowkey like having another moral dilemma right there, on that one. ”

“I’m gonna stop asking people to fucking kill people for me that’s stupid, i don’t want to do that anymore”

This is so interesting, because day 1 he just wanted the statistic, and it was okay for him to do traps or gaslight people and all that. Then it was no traps, no violence. Then it was it’s okay to influence the opinions of people who already want to kill the people I want dead. Now it’s like, even that is not okay.

7/21/24 building Flame’s volcano in one day

45:00 [unprompted] “do you know something I was thinking of, which like, i just feel like it would be so easy to turn like, any tree, at spawn, into a trap. It would be so easy right? [...] I’m not gonna do it! Just like a fun idea. [..] [starts making the trap] but then it would make it real. I shouldn’t do this actually. I- i shouldn’t do this. This isn’t a good idea. Nevermind. Nevermind. [rubs face] Ooh my god, back to building back to building. I’m building I’m just building. [puffs out breath] I’m just building. I’m building a castle. I’m not why would I - why would i even make a [giggles] why did I even do that in the first place.” 

2:43:00 breaking the bedrock of the end fountain to make a concrete duper “i feel really good at this. Like too good at this. It’s just holding down q, it’s not that special. But fuck. ‘It’s in your blood’ I don't want to be the guy that left behind, that broke all that bedrock, you know? I don’t want that to be my legacy, I don't want that to be my reputation. I don’t want that to be what I leave behind. Aw geeze. [breaks last bedrock] oh my god. [frustrated] That was effortless”

7:31:30 “‘it’s ok you can blame all your blunders on the demon’ (seri) [lore] what if there was no demon. [not lore] new headcanon. Just me trying to justify my acts. [soft giggle] waittt.. [pause] thank goodness the demon is real, so. the demon is real. Only i can see him” 

8:23:00 crashout over not being “able” to defend himself.  “‘its okay zam we saw how you are at the end of every single season’ (citrus) yea, you guys have. The deep darkness that’s within me, [giggle] ugh. ‘They’ll see… one day’ (mer) I don’t want them to see, no, that’s the thing, i don’t want them to see. [..] It’s just like, like I Could fight, it’s just such a hassle, to like, get into it, and then not, you know. Cause like, okay, okay, here here, let’s envision it, lets say I do want to fight people, right? theoretically, but, I don’t want to let out the evil evil darkness that’s within me, right? How the hell am I gonna do that when I’m constantly taking fights, constantly losing, constantly getting overly attached, overly invested in conflict, like how am i gonna, how am I gonna contain the demon within, if I, what’s it called, if I, if I’m constantly getting myself into fights? You know? ‘Getting good’ (chips) no but like I’m being dead serious, like cause, what’s it called, eventually they’re gonna hit me in a way that is gonna make me want to go full force, there’s no point in trying to fight if I’m not gonna go 100% all in, you know? So. I dunno. Maybe if I get better at my self control and discipline” 

So there’s two things. One, “it’s a hassle” is classic burnout. And you just have to wait for burnout to leave. And two, he is very self aware that someone will do something that will make him get invested. But he won’t flip that switch until that happens because there is no point. Which is very valid and wise. 

It’s such an interesting conversation, because it’s the first time he hasn’t made breaking his oath into a silly lore moment. It’s really settling into being a real part of him. He’s being honest about what fighting would actually do.

10:36:00 talks to jumper about his pacifism and their parallels. He tells her about how he knows he’ll get too invested and he wont want to hold back. As opposed to being unable. 

7/24/24 

53:10 Zam goes to the trial chambers again “dude wait these slimes have strength, are they gonna kill me? Dude I wanted to feel something but now I’m just not feeling anything actually. I was, I was, I was expecting more of a challenge”

7/25/24 day 1 peace trials

16:30 “do you think SB737 is going to kill me if he finds me? His layer’s off, I think he ran away from spawn after that one. I could see him trying though. I’ve lowkey, dude, lowkey i've been wishing someone would kill me, unfortunately I did starve to death, so now I don’t wish someone would kill me anymore. But like, it’s just been sooo peaceful, building these past few days you know? Like i haven’t ran into any kind of metal peril in soooo long like that’s crazy you know. It’s been a hot minute.”

First time he talks about wanting to be chased. 

37:00 annoyed about SB butting him in D teir for how easy he would be killed.  “‘zam is the most aggressive pacifist’ yea! Cause I mean how else am I supposed to let my anger out other than with my words. I still have emotions. They're still there” 

7/29/24 

1:07:24 still ignoring Bacon “If I’m gonna be a pacifist and not kill people, I should be able to hold a grudge somehow” “my only fighting method” 

Plotting the shift in zam’s mindset is like making a color spectrum and it’s just ever so slightly gradient-ed and before you know it it’s just all red.

8/17/24 

58:00  MANE: “but think about how many hearts I’ve given you before Zam”  ASH: “WAIT. ZAm is accepting hearts from people That Kill? That’s not very peaceful of you zam. That goes against your oath. You’re just accepting heart that has, that puts blood on your hands. I’m not even joking about this” ZAM: “I-, I don’t. I don’t think it does.” ASH: “You’re benefiting from the spoils of the death that you claim to be so against”  Zam jumps away from the conversation at the same time. nervously? 

ZAM: “[calmly] if kills have already happened what am I supposed to do to stop it. I only care about myself not killing people” [parkouring over to the roof of the house] ASH: “You literally” ZAM: “not other people. The server can do whatever the fuck it wants. I don’t care” PANGI” aaahhhhh” ASH: “That’s the most. That’s the most selfish view” 

ZAM: “I learned from you! The best side to play is all sides, right? That’s what you said [...] hypocrytical as fuck” ASH: “I mean, I’m not claiming to be any good person, I’m just saying your whole oath and code of honor is” ZAM: “I’m not either. I’m trying to be a good person but, hey” PANGI: “You’re doing a really bad job I can tell you that, Zam” ZAM: “yea. [swings around to look at pangi] coming from you is crazy” 

1:03:00 “‘you’ve only done build commissions for incredibly violent people huh’ (arch) that is something to consider huh, am I [sharp breath in] let me put on the lore music hold on. Am I. and I, I don’t think I’m the worst person to- okay. No. you know what? It doesn’t matter. Because there are worse people on this server. So I’m not that bad by comparison [...] You know I’m doing better than I did last season [...] So I’m okay. I’m happy with my choices I feel like. I dunno. I mean like gaining, gaining hearts is not the worst thing in the world, it’s kind of like the point of the server is it not? I dunno. Hmmm ‘i mean violent people are the ones who have the hearts’ (citrus) exactly! Yea, my only, the only people I CAN do business with is the violent people”

“But by taking hearts from them am I not encouraging them to kill more? Yea, that’s something to consider as well, you know? Cause, but it’s like. Ugggghhh let me read through the oath again. ‘Are they killing other violent people or innocents’ (arch) that’s true! I mean. They kill innocents when they feel like killing innocents it depends on the person i’m dealing with. [...]  I can’t control what other people do. It’s not selfish [heavy emphasis. Meaning ashsawg’s comment] it’s just like, me controlling what I can control. You can only control, you should only worry about what you can control, and what I can control is limiting myself.”

“I mean shit. What do I even want these hearts for” 

“‘you got one kill’ ‘you killed planet’ okay okay okay you killed planet okay. I hate how many people are talking about that. [..]  ‘YOU CANNOT DENY IT ZAM’ yes I fucking can! Yes I fucking can! Because I shot at him as a fucking like bit, because was obviously never to kill him, and he took off all his fucking armor. I’ve been over it! I have been over it like a million times it’s insane! I gave back the heart too like what. [opens statistics] Like it doesn’t even count. [closes statistics] It does not count. ‘You’re still killing’ [mocking] you're still killing. Okay actual like bot opinion. Bot take. Actual bot take is what this is. Insane. Like actually insane. The fact that people are still on this is craaaazy like actually crazy. ‘PANGI HASN’T’ oohhhh that’s what this is about. That’s what this is about. That’s what this is about, it’s about pangi, and and pangi being better than me okay.” 

“That’s what this is about. It means nothing to me. Means nothing to me. I don’t care. PANGI LITERALLY- okay. Okay. okay. Okay. okay. Okay. okay. Okay. [giggle laugh] pangi is a pacifist because he wants to be. But that’s like. Dude, woogie 1 for 1 took my thing. Dude, it’s crazy how many people are pacifist why did everyone like take my thing I mean like the whole point is proof of concept is prove that it’s possible, right, but like heh heh. It’s also lame that other people are taking my thing. [more deranged leaning giggles] ‘everybody wants to be princezam.’ (mer) oh my god. “

8/19/24 

~1:11:00 found Mapicc in his base. MAPICC: “and i just like, when are you gonna kill people” ZAM: “pppffff [mocking/flabberghasted] ‘when are you going to kill people?’ [reduced to laughter] MAPCIC: ”mmhmm” ZAM: “I’m not!” MAPICC: “see that's so weird.” [...] ZAM: “you start critting me out I don’t fight back” MAPICC: “actually?” ZAM: “no like genuinely, yea” MPAICC: “wait. Okay [pots up and takes all armor off but helmet and boots]” 

1:34:00 “a little terrifying i can’t lie. it’s weird. I feel like after an encounter like that I’d have a teammate to go talk to about this. But there really isn't anyone like that this time around”

8/22/24 

3:30 about the mapicc infestation “It was a very interesting fight. Honestly one of my favorite fights of the season�� 

19:40 “ohh ‘kaboodle the pacifist’ (evi4) Wait kaboodle the pacifist? Are we fucking serious. Yo. okay. Okay.  i’m not even going to say nothing bro. I’m not even going to say nothing. I’m. I’m not even going to say nothing. I’m not even going to say nothing. I’m not. I’m not even [starting to laugh]  going to say nothing, bro [deep breath in and out] how come the one season. Like the one season, that i do it and it’s like interesting, everyone else decides to do it. In season 4 no one copied subz. Everyone made fun of him. But now, but now i do it and everyone wants to fucking be me okay. Okay. no okay. No okay. No like. Bro. [so sad] [...] ‘Everyone is just scared of the big pvp-ers’ (arch) that’s true. It’s not even. It’s not even like me. Oh my god. It’s not even because i’m cool. No it’s not even because of me, it’s just they don’t want to get killed”

27:00 kab asks if she can talk to zam and get advice “oh bet. Oh i love giving advice to my fellow pacifists. My favorite thing to do ever” /sarcastic

31:40 Woogie drops in “Zam is amazing at making people peaceful”

34:00 “if your goal is pacifism, then yea, he’s passing, but if your goal is to not get murdered by people then you probably shouldn’t be destroying other people’s builds, you know. That’s how you start wars” about pangi’s pacifism. 

Which is ALSO interesting. Because zam cares about not starting wars because he doesn't want to get emotionally pulled into a fight.

ZAM: “its like i’m in a skit. And like, as soon as i start questioning one character, and another character comes out and is like “ooh i’m also a remake of you!” what the fuck is happening” 

“You know what’s keeping me going is that i’ll probably outlast them” 

42:40 “is this a bad thing? Am i bad for not wanting them to be a, [laugh] to be peaceful like me? Is that a bad thing? I mean like, i feel like, uhg. But it’s like, they- [sharp breath in] what is- what have THEY gone through? To want this change” 

“Like kaboodle is doing it to save her skin. Woogie is doing it to save his skin, like. It’s very different i feel like. It’s just very different. I [whispers] oh  my god. [spins around] what did. What do they know! What do they know. Oh my god. Fuck damn. I think that’s why i’m upset. It’s not that like, [long pause] bruh.” 

“How can i rise about the rest. That's what i want to do now. That’s what I wanna do now. I want to rise above the rest. That’s what i’m thinking about right now, i’ll be honest. How do I [sharp breath in] [blows air out] like. This is-. [grumble] this is stupid. This is dumb. I shouldn't even think about this. You know what this is dumb."

48:00 “it’s not like a fun thing to do. Like. I- being a pacifist has been like, it’s it’s had its moments i guess. I dunno though. Definitely, i’ll admit it, not the most.. fun. But uh. Thats. that’s besides the point. That’s okay. That’s.. that’s fine [deep breath in and out]” 

“‘being a pacifist isn't for everyone, you have to truly believe in the rules and know your own limits so you can be pacifist’ (hexlarry) but like that’s the thing, do i even like, fully believe in it? Cause now i’m starting to question myself. I mean I did it not so that i could save my own skin. I did it so that i could, i dunno, just avoid repeating prior mistakes. And things like that. Sooo. because getting myself into fights would probably lead me down a very very dark path and i don't want to [sharp breath] i don't wanna do all that so by avoiding conflict at all costs I, I can, what’s it called, hmmm [spins around] fuck [princezam distress noises] [...] ‘has something changed’ i dunno. I’d hope not”

“‘it feels like they’re mocking you a little’ (evu) a little bit! I guess so. That’s kind of true as well honestly. I dunno. Hmmm, it’s very. Very interesting. Very interesting turn of events. I dunno. It’s not that i feel like it’s my thing. I feel like everyone should be allowed to do it, it just feels like the way that they’re doing it kind of is like, i guess it is, i dunno. It’s a little bit like.. Hmm yea ‘it’s an easy way out to them’ (arch) to them, to them it doesn't have any of the same significance it does to me. They're doing it because they want to live longer, they want to hold onto their hearts longer, i’m doing it because I like- i essentially need to- ugh. I dunno. I’m doing it- hrmmm. No, i’m doing it because… Because i want to. Because I want to. I want to. It’s my decision. I want to do it. I dunno [jumps around thinking for a while]” 

The last part is said in the same tone he used during the Abyss arc when his team wasn't logging on to help him.

“It’s not about what other people have done though. It’s about me upholding an oath i guess. Me.. avoiding [giggle] repeating mistakes and stuff. Umm. i dunno ‘it’s a conflict with myself’ (mer) exactly. It’s entirely. Entirely within me. And that was a situation that, admittedly, I had control over. I could have just not shot my bow at him. It’s a lesson learned i guess. But. I dunno. I- I just hate it. I hate it so much because that was not meant to happen at all. Like. it’s ridiculous. Its just ridiculous i feel like. I dunno. ‘Bro is still talking about this’ yea because I care about it.”

8/23/24

5:38:00  WEMMBU: “you’re profiting off the economy of people being murdered” ZAM: “I don’t know if that’s true at all even. That’s just. [trying to talk while wemmbu is talking over him] Anyone who lives on this server is profiting off the economy bro. I don't know what you’re talking about. [...] That that’s like breathing air on this server is benefitting form the economy bro” WEMMBU: “and you’re the one that’s saying you’re and innocent soul bruh” ZAM: “i’m, somewhat innocent. I’m innocent to the point where I won’t lure someone to spawn so you guys can kill them. That's how innocent I am” WEMMBU: “wah wahh wah” 

And he leaves the group

ZAM: “Get me the fuck out of here. I simply participate in society. All i do is live and breathe air and try to live an honest to god living.”

~5:51:00 “‘Oh so you agree you’d be responsible in that scenario’ (arch) yea! If he’s going out of his way to kill people For That [the build he wanted to commission], like to pay For That, I feel like yea, I feel like then I’m definitely responsible. [...] But mane, flame, mapicc, they already have the hearts, I know they withdrew them from their hotbar, they did in front of me, it did the sound. So, yea. And flame just had a heart bank that he went and grabbed. So. yea no, those hearts were already acquired. They were, like, those kills happened, it’s over. It’s good.” 

8/24/24

2:13:00 “that was interesting. What a day. I almost hopped into a fight. Probably wont do it again, that was a one time offer. But. i dunno. I was willing to die for a cause. I wasn’t going to hit him.” 

“Maybe i faltered. Did I falter? By willing to fight? I wouldn’t hit him. I don’t think. Maybe I’d hit him. I don’t- [scoff] would it be fine as long as i don't kill him?” “it’s my rules” 

“Yea mapicc did get really excited when i mentioned pvp. That was really interesting. That was cool. I do have no critting yea. Hmmm. i dunno. I did just want to support my friend flame ‘you're just helping out a friend i think thats in the servers best interests’ (arch) that’s true. Yea. if i, i dunno, cause like the main goal is to just work in the server’s best interests. And i guess in that situation that, specific, little situation, fighting flame was actually in everyone, everyone who’s online’s best interests. Ironically. So yea. Despite it normally being the wrong answer, violence was kind of the answer to fixing that problem there. ” 

2:18:00  “I’m worried though. Like I feel like the lack of violence encourages me to like, i dunno” 

“I think people should be more violent, i think that’s fair, that’s what this server is about. I haven't changed my stance on that, the server is about killing people. It’s not about [giggle] the atrocities I’ve committed, that’s for sure” 

“‘That’s not very pacifist I mean’ like that’s whatever, it’s princezam then. It doesn’t matter. Pacifist is just the moniker I chose, but if it’s not fitting it’s not fitting. I’m doing whatever I believe” 

“‘the blowing up builds and killing weaklings was your more problem. not your violence inherently’ (arch) exactly. And unfortunately I feel like with any sort of violence [tsht] unfortunately all paths lead to that road. You know? Everything will just eventually get me there. I think it’s better to swear it off, you know. It’s just, It’s just for the better”

Flame blows up spawn.

2:52:00 “And my heart count too. I was trying to get to 20 but like - what does that even do, what is that even good for, if i can't do anythin- if i’m powerless to stuff like this, if i’m powerless to this. This. Like what’s the point, even like what’s-... I feel like everything I’ve done is just like actually completely futile now. Like, none of it matters. NONE of it matters, not even a little, if other people are just going to take up the mantle. What like, what’s the POINT?... I don't get it. I mean holding out, not giving in, despite all of this, would prove me as a way stronger player than him, but WHAT GOOD DOES THAT ACCOMPLISH. SO WHAT?! Like, he’s just going to do this again, like why does it matter? Why does it even matter? What the- what does moral highground get me? What does moral high ground even get me. Why did i think this was even a good idea even a little bit, [so loud] OH MY GOD. [pause] ‘It doesn't even mean anything to anyone but me’ (arch) exactly. This. oh my god. It’s not just to myself though (arch) it’s ahhh Fuck. It’s supposed to make up for everything I did- For just everything I did in general really. That’s what it’s supposed to be, but, like ah, does anyone care really? Does anyone care? Other than me? At this point I don't think so. There’s bigger problems. ‘Spawn looked the best this season’ it did. It really did. It really really did. It really did. [tabs out for a long time, just silent] i can't’ believe this. I can’t believe this. [sigh] oh my god. [leaning head back] Dude. and like. Oh my god. Yea no one is going to do anything that’s true. The fact of the matter is [laughing as talking] no one is going to do anything about this. Because no one cares. And that’s what he’s going to realize. [...] That’s all fine to me, it doesn't matter. It doesn’t matter. This is definitely the furthest I’ve wavered, on this path of mine. Dear god. [blows out breath] and i was the only one here to do anything about it oh my god [silence] ‘they did call me ground zero’ [puts head in hands while reading it] is it my fault? Is it my- wait you’re right. [breathing heavily] it kind of in a, in a weird, fucked up twisted way, it kind of is my fault. Because my stupid pacifism stuff it it spiraled out of control and got to woogie, got to pangi, it’s it’s like [grrr grumble] (all of chat is screaming that it isn't his fault.) I, oh my god. Oh my god. Dude like. I actually feel so dumb. I feel like I’ve wasted the past month or two. I’ve actually just feel like I’ve been wasting my time. Like, like none of that matters. Actually none of that matters, I feel like, anymore. And like, because I did all that, everyone else copied me. Everyone copied me, they were right! No, they were right. That’s the messed up part of this, is that they’re Right. And that they probably will get a fight out of this, that’s the Fucked up part of this” 

3:04:00 “If I fight them I give them exactly what they want. It’s so fucked up. There’s no, there's no winning option here. There’s nothing I can do to win” 

Realizes he can just rebuild. Rejuvenated in one second flat. 

“Do I just keep rebuilding it over and over? [...]  But I don’t care! I’m not giving up. I don't care, I don't care!” “this is literally what I do. What am I tripping for? This is literally what I do”

3:35:30 “I feel like most people would not have the mental fortitude to experience what I just experienced and then Not Fight. Like that is an absurd thing to do. But it’s a me thing to do. So” 

3:37:00 “i know i don't have all of my screws together, but i definitely, i think i could win a battle of mental fortitude if I wanted”

Talks to everyone and forms Gaia’s Hand

5:46:00 wrapping up stream along “dude I know like, i’m real confident and real happy and shit, but I , I am terrified. I am terrified [stares into a big cave thinking] i dunno. I'm not gonna second guess myself but. It’s just- it’s a scary battle. It’s a very scary battle. I dunno”

“Mean, I’m not alone. That's true. That definitely helps [...] I feel like the last time I spent a lot of time repairing spawn it didn't end too well. Lowkey that’s when everything went horribly wrong, actually. i feel like it’s just been downhill since there.”

“I am doing this to spite flame, but at the same time the thing I care about the most is just having the server where spawn can't just get destroyed. I dunno. That’s what I care about the most”

5:53:40 “‘you and your attachments to spawn’ (seri) [wistful] it’s, it’s the heart of the server. It’s the heart of the server. And, i dunno, I can’t, i can’t help myself but protect it. In every way that I can. I dunno. It’s just in my nature. Which is ironic, considering the atrocities I’ve committed.” 

8/29/24

44:30 “support the people trying to ban them and the builds won’t get destroyed anymore’ (chips) that’s true. But do the ends justify the means? Like sure I will get spawn builds being safe, but I’m, I also am taking some part in someone getting banned off the server. which, i dunno. I feel like i don't want to be a part of” 

45:00 “Is it for the greater good, or it for my greater good. It has to be objective, it can’t be a skewed biased point of view” 

1:05:20 “i can only control myself, and only the small few who have joined me” “kaboodle and woogie” “Ironically they’re truly the only ones who are part of gaia’s hand”

Week long break for MMCR

9/9/24

11:40 ZAM: “I’ve kind of realigned my look on the server [...] Everyone’s goal goes back to, like, killing. So I feel like if I help anyone I’m like sort of contributing to the violence on the server, which is something I- which I can’t prevent obviously but it’s not also something I’d like to contribute to. The whole point is I don't want to contribute to violence and you know, kill people I guess. I dunno” 

How far princezam has come. It was never about actual pacifism… except now it is. He truly is a pacifist now. He used to be a bad pacifist and now he’s just a pacifist for real. How interesting. 

19:00 “That’s just the spite and hatred in my heart. I’m full of hatred recently, that’s something i’ve noticed as well. Definitely something i’ve noticed” 

44:00 “I feel like nothing accomplishes anything. I feel like anything I would do would just make things worse. I dunno. Maybe that’s just me though. Maybe that's just me and the way I feel. I dunno” 

“I just want to win. You know? But how do I go about that even? There’s nothing to win against."

~1:27:00 “An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind” “interesting phrase considering the circumstance I’m in. [...] yea i mean violence is good to those who love it. I’m just unfortunately not one of those people. At least at the moment. [pause] Well I wouldn't say at the moment actually. I would say I’m not one of those people. For sure. Used to be. Not anymore.” 

1:53:00  “when i think of goals, the first thing that comes to mind is like, laying in a field of flowers. That’s what I want to do. That’s what I want to do. I dunno”

9/11/24

~40:00 “it makes me question what my path is, cause i’m not, i’m not i’m not i’m not  i’m not a killer or anything at least i don't want to kill anyone, i don't want to be doing that. Soo where does that leave me?  What am I gonna do, what am I princezam gonna do.” 

[necrotic-nephilim]

hi! i was thinking of joining your new discord server but i have a pretty busy schedule, not a lot of free time, and i tend to be very lurky and don't really engage much in conversations, especially as im sort of new to batman and DC as a whole. ik i sound like a bit of an ahole asking if it's ok for me to join your server and just kind of look around and watch but i don't want to do anything rude or upset anyone. ty (:

hi love! i wanna make it so clear: the dead dove batfam discord server is 10000% lurker friendly! like you don't have to send a single message if you don't want to. if you just want to spy and witness conversations, that is *entirely* valid! i'm a lurker in a lot of servers and ik for some ppl it's just nice to read convos when they have the time. if you ever want to chat you're more than welcome to as well, but if you just wanna be a silent member, that's totally allowed <3 you're not an asshole at all, we're all adults with busy lives, i know discord is not a priority for most ppl!

here's the invite link, we'd love to have you!

[syncogon]

you know what time it is CHAT SHENANIGANS TIME

(tka s3 ep 12 / ep 36)

the bad thign about chats is that it takes me forever to get through bc im pausing every frame to notice the fun details. the only two guys with themselves as their pfps are th and sx hahaha - oh yes and chibi hst with the corgi

wait it's already dec 3? couldn't have guessed from the way these ppl are dressing lmao

aaand smc eyes are so nice

go off queeeeen ugh it feels so good to hear her deliver this speech (even though i thought her voice sounded slightly off at first).

god i love ee drama scenes. just the putting cui li and sx and xsq and smc and qf and ee mooks all in a room just always ends up in fun times hahaha

ughhhhhh if only i had more tl time

(very very roughly:)

lxb: if yq returns to the alliance and joins tyranny…. fr: what a joke, how could yq join tyranny! lxb: im just saying if! if yq joined tyranny, their starting roster, tsk… fr: say less, thats too scary. lxb: hahaha, quaking in fear! yx: this roster is indeed frightening

"ive already been set as tyranny's starting roster" hahahaha

every time i see xsq stuck in the ee cesspit im just like. man! man. truly the only sane guy here

love how sx looks here though his eyes are so bright!

YEAHHHH smc apple (pear? idr) scene. this also has dating sim / visual novel vibes but i love itttt i love her

FUCK i lvoe them im literally just screenshotting every single shot

half a year until thunderclap my friend

he did it he said the line xDDDD

it's him!!!! the berserk berserker!!!!! lmao this is slightly less dramatic having him have to walk over from another room vs just standing up, but wooooooo

another summer of sleep being dressed in all black really makin me feel some kinda way

wahhhh every time we have this sorta "recognizing each other through playstyle alone" it always gives me feels!!!

also fuck i can't believe we were robbed of the tiny herb happy team up - well i can believe it but im still bummed! wheres my gyj qyf reunion

omgg yeah and the "fuck im not used to seeing this name talk to me"

as always when s3 don't got me the ED got me. theyre all just so expressive.... shoot hit image limit thanks to the xiaocheng HAHA but anyway i should really just marathon the EDs

[sarahjswift]

This is the first Chapter of my new fanfiction, It was Hot And It Was Summer And - or IWHAIWSA. This chapter is called Oh, Gods. It is a Rowaelin single parent AU, which I have really enjoyed as of late. I hope you all enjoy!

PS: I attempted to make a banner and I think I failed IM SORRYYY

Tag List <3: @backtobl4ck @aelinchocolatelover, @blue-bird17 and @renxzs! my lovely supporters ily <33333 (if you lwould like to be added just chat me/comment/reblog and say so! :D)

Warnings: Language and some light..heated...thinking 👀

Word Count: 2.3k

I hope you all enjoy!

...

“Oh Gods it’s hot,” Aelin complained, panting as she slowed to a stop. 

“C’mon mom!” Eve cried, pulling on her mother’s hand. At the age of six, the little girl was a bundle of energy and had no problem climbing the large, rocky in front of them in 100 degree weather. 

“Sweetie, don’t you want to go swim in the ocean?” Aelin tried not to show the pleading tone of her voice and she secretly crossed her fingers behind her back. No matter what she had paid for this trip, there was no way she was going to cross this mountain, her daughter agreeing or not. By the time they’d finish, it would be dark out. But it would be sure as hell a lot easier if Eve decided she would comply. 

Eve considered, her small tan face scrunching in completement. She looked up at her mother with her blue-gold eyes - the only thing she had in common with Aelin, as she took after her dad - and nodded eagerly, beaming. 

“Thank you, sweetie. Mom will buy you a popsicle.” Eve cheered and ran down the dirt road they’d trekked through to reach the mountain, disappearing behind the trees. 

“Wait for Mom!” Aelin called, and forced herself into a jog. She cursed as pants immediately wracked her body, trying miserably to keep pace with her small kid. If I was seven years younger, I would be able to do this, she thought sourly. It wasn’t like she was old - only twenty-eight, as Eve had been an unplanned baby. But although her face and body were young and beautiful - and they are, she thought with smug pride - her insides had decided years of physical training didn’t matter if you had a baby and took a break. 

Aelin slowed as she heard her daughter’s footsteps slow. The sound of Eve’s laughter sounded through the path and she couldn’t help the smile that broke across her face. No matter if Eve was a surprise - she was the best gift in Aelin’s life. 

Aelin rounded the corner and let out a semi-exasperated sigh. Eve was squealing as she played a schoolyard game with two small children. They were completely different in appearance and yet - there was something similar about them. One of the children, a young boy, had light brown skin and dark gray hair. His huge eyes were a deep brown and framed with big lashes anyone would be envious of. The other child was full of energy while her companion was shy - she had light skin and long black hair that reached the middle of her back. She had green eyes that gave a startling appearance to her young face. 

The three children looked up at Aelin as she neared them. “Mommy!” Eve flung her arms out to her mother and turned to her companions. “This is my mom.”

“Hi!” the girl giggled. “I’m Lilly an’ this is my little brother Henri.” Henri gave Aelin a small smile and a wave, and Lilly flung her arms around her brother. 

“It’s nice to meet you,” Aelin smiled down at the adorable pair. She looked around the path and found no sign of an adult present. “Where is your parent?” 

“Our dad was behind us but he couldn’t keep up,” Lilly stated matter-of-factly. Aelin laughed - it seemed like the father of these two was very similar to her. 

As if on cue, the sound of panting and footsteps reached their ears and the group turned to see a man jogging through the trees toward them. 

Oh, Gods. 

Of course this man was the hottest being Aelin had ever seen. His bronze skin shone in the sun and his swim trunks and gray tank top didn’t do much to hide his muscular arms and legs. As he neared the group, Aelin could see he had the most beautiful eyes she had ever seen. They were a stunning shade of green, and they swept over her as he finally slowed to a halt.

“Hello,” he said, giving them a small smile. His voice had a small lilt to the end, some accent Aelin couldn't place. He’s probably from Sexytown. I’ve heard that’s a nice little place. 

The man looked down at his children disapprovingly. “I told you guys not to run away from me.” Lilly grinned up at him and Henri hugged his father’s leg. 

Chuckling, the man looked back up at Aelin and his eyes widened slightly and only for a second, as if only seeing her just then. He stuck out a hand that Aelin shook - it was warm and strong. That’s just his hand. What about his- Aelin shoved away the thoughts forming in her mind. 

“I’m Rowan.” Rowan. The name rang through her and she struggled to remember her own. 

“I’m Aelin. It looks like your kiddos have met my daughter, Eve.” The words came easier than she thought, and she remembered to smile down at Eve and ruffle her brown hair. 

“Yep, seems like they’re already close friends.” Rowan looked down at the children, who were now playing a game of tag, his face soft. A not-so-small part of Aelin wanted him to look at her that way. All the time. 

“We might be spending some more time together,” Aelin laughed. Rowan gave a slight smile, and his eyes looked over her again. His eyes seemed to see all the way through her, and she felt utterly exposed under his gaze. She drew in a shaky breath as his eyes finally met hers again, the air between them electric. 

Aelin didn’t know how long they stood there, staring at each other in some kind of sexy adult staring contest, before Eve broke the silence by tugging on her mother’s arm and pleading, “Can Lilly and Henri go with us to the ocean? Puh-lease?” 

Aelin cleared her throat and tried to calm her racing heart. “Uhm, well, it’s up to Ro-Mr. Rowan, here.” 

She could have sworn Rowan’s eyes darkened at her calling him that before his face went blank. “Of course,” he said smoothly. “Henri, do you want to go?”

The small, shy boy nodded eagerly, looking up adoringly at his father. “Well, they both have their swimsuits on, so we could just walk there together,” Rowan continued. 

“Sounds like a plan.”

___

Oh, Gods. 

Twenty minutes later, Aelin was sitting on a towel making a sandcastle with her daughter and she was doused in sweat. 

It wasn’t fair - why, when she had just wanted a chill vacation, did there have to be a man-god living at the resort at the same exact time? She tried to not look at him, because every time she did her eyes couldn’t help darting to his insanely ripped upper torso. Especially as it was now gleaming with seawater from his quick lap around the beach. He was sitting on a towel next to her, quietly watching his children as Lilly and Henri hauled water up from the beach to aid Eve’s sandcastle construction. 

“Mommy, you look really hot,” Eve observed, looking up at her mother from the brim of her massive yellow sun hat - that a certain dad had decided was perfectly suit for a six year old - and frowned. 

“Aw, thank you, sweetie,” Aelin smiled down at her daughter. Eve could be so sweet sometimes, giving her these random compliments-

“No, I mean that you look like you’re overheating,” Eve clarified, her frown growing deeper. “I learned about it in class and you have all the - the uh, the seemptoms.” She began to list off the symptoms on her fingers. “You’re flushed, sweaty, your eyes look far away, you keep looking sideways-”

“Okay,” Aelin nearly shouted. She felt like her face was on fire and she risked a glance toward Rowan - who was shaking with silent laughter, his eyes dancing. “Oh my Gods, Eve,” she moaned, mortified. 

“You should go into the water,” Lilly chimed in. “It will cool you down.” 

“Yeah!” Eve agreed, giving her new friend a beam. “Go on Mommy! I don’t need your help with the sandcastle anymore, I promise.”

“Well, I still have to watch you, honey,” Aelin reminded her daughter, gulping down some water in the desperate hope that her daughter would just leave it alone. 

“I can watch them,” Rowan suggested. He had moved closer to their towel and was looking at Aelin mischievously, his lips pulled into a mocking smile. 

Aelin closed her eyes and sighed through her nose for a brief instant before making up her mind. It was her vacation too, dammit. “Oh, alright,” she gave in. Eve and Lilly squealed. “For thirty minutes. Rowan, make sure they stay out of trouble.”

Rowan gave her a salute and she rolled her eyes, smiling. She pulled off her sundress in one motion, revealing her swimsuit - she’d bought it on sale at Target, but it looked designer - and walked down the broiling sand to the water. She might have strutted a little. Maybe. 

She glanced behind one single time - to find Rowan’s gaze trained on her, eyes drinking all of her in. 

↜↝

Oh, Gods. 

Rowan clenched his jaw as he watched that damned woman saunter down to the beach, her hips swaying with every step. She had driven him crazy before, but in that damn red bikini? He was dead. 

“Dad, can you go get us some water?” Lilly asked him, interrupting his reverie. He glanced over to his children, who were now making a “sandtown” with Eve. 

“Weren’t you guys just doing that?” Rowan raised an eyebrow. He felt his gaze dart over to Aelin again, who was stepping into the water. The setting sun reflected off the ocean, painting her tan skin into a beautiful golden. 

“Yeah, but now we are doing something else!” Lilly cried, already getting upset. Henri looked up at Rowan pleadingly, widening his eyes. Rowan heaved a sigh and stood up, grabbing the bucket.

It only occurred to him halfway down the beach that now he would be nearly next to Aelin, who had specifically told him to watch the kids. He cursed and made to turn, but found three pairs of eyes pinned on him menacingly. 

He reached the waves and edged in slowly, the icy bite lapping against his heels. Aelin, who was waist deep in the water, turned to him. He was struck again by her brilliant beauty. Her adorable button nose, her perfect symmetrical face, and most of all her exquisite eyes. He’d never seen anything like it - they were the most beautiful shade of blue, pure like the Hawaiian water they were standing in. But the part that made them special was the ring of gold around her pupils - gold like flames. 

“I thought you were watching the kids,” Aelin said, raising an eyebrow. Her lips curved into a smile. Rowan wanted to kiss it. 

He gestured to the bucket in his hand and abruptly bent down to fill it with the water rushing into it. He felt Aelin’s eyes on him as he stood up. “Uhm. They wanted water,” he said dumbly. 

Aelin laughed, a beautiful, joyful sound. “I bet they did. You okay, Rowan?”

At the sound of his name on her lips he wanted to hug her tightly to him and his body even moved an inch closer before he clenched his fists to his sides. Aelin tracked every movement and shrugged, backing further into the water. He watched, jaw clenched, as she tipped her head back and ran her fingers through her hair, giving him a full view of her jaw and beautiful neck and collarbone. The dusky sky behind her made her look like an angel. 

“They’ll be wanting this,” Rowan said weakly, and forced himself to turn and walk back up the white sand to their spot. Every single part of him wanted to stay and ravish her in the water - but that was nowhere near appropriate. He was a father and she was a mother and their kids were literally feet away from them, playing. His behavior was unacceptable - and Lyria would think so too, he grumbled mentally. 

“I got the water,” he announced as he reached the towels, holding the bucket high over his head in triumph. He was imitating the motion from the Lion King, Henri’s favorite movie, and the action wasn’t missed by his son, whose eyes sparkled with delight. The children let out a cheer and Rowan squatted to help them build the sandtown. 

__

Rowan was pretty sure he was completely sunburned but he would rather be fried to a crisp than never see Aelin in that bikini again. 

After exchanging numbers - for the kids, he told himself - the two families had parted ways. Thankfully Henri and Lilly were exhausted after a very exciting afternoon and they retired to their large hotel room. 

Buying a vacation at a luxury resort in Hawaii hadn’t been cheap - in fact, it had taken years to save up for this - but Rowan thanked the gods he’d booked it. He, and the kids, had needed this break after all the drama of the past two years. 

After a dinner of PB&Js and Sofia the First, the kids went down to sleep fairly easily and Rowan slumped on the couch and turned on a random show. He didn’t follow the show, a mediocre sitcom, but he was comforted by the mindless dialogue. Suddenly, his phone dinged. Picking it up, he saw the ID and jolted upward. 

Aelin: Hey, this is Aelin 

Rowan: Hello, I’m Rowan

Aelin: I know 

Aelin: 😆

Rowan cursed. He sounded like an idiot. 

Aelin: Eve has been talking about Lilly + Henri since we left so I had to text

Rowan: Haha yep pretty much the same here

Rowan: What hotel are you staying in? Maybe we can meet up sometime tomorrow

Aelin: I’m staying at the Oceanside View Hotel

Rowan: Oh that’s ours as well!

Aelin: No way! I’m room 4A

Rowan froze. There was absolutely no way, no way in hell.

Rowan: Seriously?

Aelin: haha, yup!

Rowan: ..we’re in room 4B

[your-queer-dad]

Hey dad,

I kinda need some advice right now cause I really genuinely don’t know what to do

(Side not this is really long)

My best friend has been rather distant over the last year and it’s been making me really sad. At first I thought that it was primarily due to scheduling conflicts and their parents being a nightmare but now I’m starting to suspect that either I did something wrong or it’s their romantic partner.

I (aro) have been friends with this person for several years and I love them a lot they are like family to me. However last summer they went radio silent and no one heard anything from them for months. I lost a lot of sleep those few months and it was really bad. When I got back to school I found them and it turns out that they got locked out of their chat room account and their phone’s notifications were glitched again.

I was kinda confused about this because I wondered why they hadn’t even checked my or any one else’s messages in months or tried to reach out but their really socially awkward and kinda insecure so I brushed it off

They also told me they got a new account but made no attempt to contact me or anyone else in our social circle on it.

Several months later I found out through an aqutences slip up that they had a romantic partner. I was kinda hurt that they told this person they barely knew before me. The aqutence made me swear to secrecy because apparently my friend made them promise not to tell me.

A couple weeks later my friend slipped up and told me about their romantic partner.

I found out here that they had been dating sense the summer of radio silence.

A couple weeks after this I got contacted through the new account, I had asked several times for it at this point. Things had been kinda getting closer together after that and more scheduled had started to line up but it still wasn’t great.

Now that school is over we’ve both been mostly free online so we’ve been talking more in a group chat that a I got invited to (side note I made friends with one of the other people there and their nice so that’s pretty cool). Several days ago I asked my best friend if we could play this one game together and my best friend said yea tomorrow. That day came around and they had forgotten to download the game. This frustrated me but I brushed it off because they have memory issues so I assumed it was unintentional. They said we could play tomorrow.

The next day came along (note I’ve been starting every single conversation we’ve had) and my best friend said that we couldn’t play that day because they had plans with their romantic partner. I saw in the group chat that that plan had been made that morning. I have been waiting several days.

I feel like I am the one putting all the effort into this relationship and it really makes me sad. When I talk to their face they still say I am important to them but they haven’t done anything besides put me in the group chat.

Am I just being paranoid and the whole situation is in my head and it’s fine?

I’ve heard from other aromantics that allo friends tend to leave you behind in favour of romantic relationships after awhile. I’ve also seen other aromantics heavily scrutinised for expressing feelings of sadness over abandonment.

Im really scared to confront them about it because I don’t want to hurt their feelings, and I don’t know if it would make the situation better.

Do you have any advice on how you think I should handle this dad?

Hey kiddo, thank you so much for reaching out. I'm so sorry that sounds like a really difficult situation to deal with. Personally, I don't think it's very fair of your friend to do that to you, it sounds like you've been there for them no matter what and they keep pulling away or not being there for you. It isn't fair. You shouldn't have to be the only one putting effort into a friendship, that's not how they should work- its a two way street where both people put effort in.

Sometimes actions speak louder than words, and the way a person acts shows how they feel more than what they say. If they keep breaking their promises, or saying things they don't back up with action- then they're not being a good friend.

I personally would tell them how you're feeling and how their actions are making you feel- as someone who's been on both sides of the situation, I know sometimes when you're in a new relationship it can be really easy to be blinded by the thrill of it all and forget other responsibilities like friendships. However, it might make them more aware of how their actions are affecting your friendship.

I hope everything goes okay and I'm here to listen, my inbox is open 24/7. You got this kiddo. 🫂🫂🫂

- dad x

[malfattore]

KNOWING YOUR PARTNER WELL CAN POTENTIALLY MAKE WRITING TOGETHER A LOT EASIER. ( REPOST DO NOT REBLOG ! )

○  NAME: Erin // Xy.

○  PRONOUNS: he/him

○   PREFERENCE OF COMMUNICATION: Discord or Tumblr, either or is completely fine. I reply to both the same, tho im slow.

○    NAME OF MUSE(S): Malfatto, William de Saint-Prix, Nightstalker Joe, wow i’m really going down the basic names now, I roleplayed artorias and pate from dks but not anymore. I also muse Verulo and a small amount of Illario from acb but on the side, and more so Verulo. He’s a bit of an older muse that I did nothing with besides throw comments in for (still do, since im not sure who he fits with)

○    EXPERIENCE/HOW LONG (MONTHS/YEARS?): 10 years, off and on? Could be more tbh I’ve lost count I feel old

○    PLATFORMS YOU’VE USED: for rp, I mostly use Discord but Tumblr is nice too, when it’s functional lol

○   BEST EXPERIENCE: In General? Musing with people and creating a deep and expansive world around what little canon information we even received from Ubisoft — as well as Personal, @ardentfew @larosafatale @templarlanz @officialcahin (also w/ ur bitch ass (affectionately) baltasar) you guys have added so much to my musings and experiences to define Mal as he continues to age as my oldest muse at like 10 years now? I genuinely appreciate it wholeheartedly. These are probably my best experiences over this whole blog’s lifespan. Also I have to throw in @vilestblood, you always made me feel so welcome and appreciated as a newcomer, it really did make the whole experience for me, and while i’m over here for now, I hope you know how often i still appreciate you. I hope I can repay all of you somehow.

○    RP PET PEEVES / DEALBREAKERS: Treating my muse(s) like he’s either a sex object/disrespecting my boundaries on his sexuality, a Villain to exclusively to fit your narrative/headcanons, or automatically assuming I condone the actions of my muse just bc I am expanding on his emotions or more positive traits. as well as just seeing him as a shipping objective — Besides the fact that I am not interested in shipping Malfatto out as he is single-ship to one character and i’m more interested in defining his friendships than another spouse.

○    FLUFF, ANGST, OR SMUT: I’m a whore for angst but i’m more of a hurt-comfort kind of guy tbh, I don’t mind the pain of loss and complete defeat and hopelessness, i adore depressing themes but I do want a comforting concept to end off on. I love fluff within plot and smut is the same, I don’t particularly want just baseless smut for the sake of smut (tho it can be interesting sometimes) but if it fits well, it legit makes my heart skip djdjjhdj

○    PLOTS OR MEMES: I love memes on tumblr so much, esp as an icebreaker, but I love plotting things out more extensively so I can learn more about your characters and where they can interact more personally.

○    LONG OR SHORT REPLIES: Both but I prefer longer if the short we are talking about is like one liners. Unless we are in a very fast paced setting like discord chat, one liners make me lose muse pretty quick.

○    BEST TIME TO WRITE: Anytime I can get some quiet, I admittedly cannot write in a noisy setting. My brain is too panicked with stuff going on that I can’t zone in.

○    ARE YOU LIKE YOUR MUSE(S): I always joke around and say that he’s the kinnie so Honestly, yes? it sounds awful to relate to the serial killing doctor, who also tortures random civilians, guards, and sex workers BUT that aside, I understand his impulsivity and I understand his traumas, at least on a semi-adjacent level. We like similar things and find comfort in the same settings, though i did not expect to build him like this. I’m enough like him that I can somewhat? understand where he is coming from mentally when he does stupid impulsive shit that eventually gets his dumbass floored while also being very aware that his reactions and opinions are not something I would even consider. He’s fun he’s like the little devil on my shoulder telling me to act on impulse and commit arson when i have anxiety even over looking like i’m shoplifting

TAGGED BY: No-one. I stole this from general tags.

TAGGING: @larosafatale @ardentfew yea idk who else is active anymore, steal it

[purplecraze]

Beauty and the Beast AU 36

orange-plane-boy — 11/13/2021 3:56 PM

"Today we managed to do a lot of stuff, thats nice!" He replied going back to the counter

purplecraze — 11/13/2021 3:58 PM

He nodded. "That's true. I didn't think we'd have enough time to make the cookies if we'd read together."

orange-plane-boy — 11/13/2021 4:02 PM

Narancia nodded as he warmed up some of the food and made some more orange juice, probabily fugo needed some energy boost

He packed the leftover cookies tooz after all theybwere chirstmas cookies, not two days before cookies.

purplecraze — 11/13/2021 4:03 PM

"I hope I can take a nap before nightfall...." he sighed. no regrets, but maybe a very tiny little bit regret...

orange-plane-boy — 11/13/2021 4:04 PM

"If you want tonight i can go to the heavy door bedroom so you can take your time"

purplecraze — 11/13/2021 4:05 PM

"It makes no difference, really. I'd prefer to nap on a bed."

orange-plane-boy — 11/13/2021 4:06 PM

"If i warp you like a burrito in a blanket maybe i can carry you to your bedroom" he laughed

purplecraze — 11/13/2021 4:07 PM

"don't tempt fate, Narancia..." he leaned on his elbow.

".....lend me your pillow.."

orange-plane-boy — 11/13/2021 4:07 PM

"Dude who you think took you home when you passed out with a fever?" He snorted

purplecraze — 11/13/2021 4:08 PM

"........." Fugo didn't reply, annoyed that his comment was passed over, but he wouldn't repeat himself.

orange-plane-boy — 11/13/2021 4:11 PM

"Ok ok i have an idea hold on!"

He left the kitchen and got back some minutes later, you could hear some grounting, as if he was carring something heavy. Indeed it seemed like he was carring a matress from one of the maid's bedroom. It was a single bed size, so it managed to fit the door somehow.

"Gonna grab your pillow and blankets too old on!"

purplecraze — 11/13/2021 4:12 PM

"......?? what are you doing???"

orange-plane-boy — 11/13/2021 4:12 PM

"Well, if you cant take you to bed im gonna take the bed to you!"

purplecraze — 11/13/2021 4:14 PM

"........💢💢💢💢💢💢" Fugo covered his eyes, trying hard to not blow up. "Never mind it!" he spat his words and got up. "I'm not hungry, so I'm going to bed!💢💢 Good night!💢💢" and he strutted off, trying his hardest not to falter.

orange-plane-boy — 11/13/2021 4:15 PM

"Uh???"

What he did now?

purplecraze — 11/13/2021 4:17 PM

the door slammed hard in the distance and Fugo dumped himself down on the bed, grabbing the pillow and burying his face in it. the scent from Narancia from days ago was gone, but he pathetically tried to still find it somewhere anyway.

orange-plane-boy — 11/13/2021 4:19 PM

Confused little meow meow just wanted to help!

He huffed his cheeks and looked a the matress. Oh well, they planned to take a nap together in the dome anyway, so he dragged it there for later.

purplecraze — 11/13/2021 4:24 PM

that's a good plan, yeah.

well, now that Fugo pretending it never happened is off the table, he'll just steal your pillow later, leaving you with none, hmpf.

orange-plane-boy — 11/13/2021 4:27 PM

Narancia yawned as he got back to his room too

Having bathe aready he just changed in his night clothes (maybe now fugo would finally realize why Narancia sleeps with his jacket)

Still not too sleepy, he got back to trinkle a bit with his stuff, waiting a bit to have his usual good night chat with night panna

purplecraze — 11/13/2021 4:28 PM

As night fell, the familiar noise sounded in the distance again.

orange-plane-boy — 11/13/2021 4:29 PM

"There he is" he thinked as he got in front of the door

"Ehy big guy!" He said "Did you managed to rest a bit?"

purplecraze — 11/13/2021 4:30 PM

of course, no reply. but somehow, the noise sounded different. closer....

orange-plane-boy — 11/13/2021 4:31 PM

"I just wanted to check on you, but im a bit sleepy so im not really gonna stay here a lot, sorry"

Even if Fugo dosent remember those chats, Narancia made sure to do it anyway, after all loving Fugo meant to love this part of him too right?

purplecraze — 11/13/2021 4:33 PM

the noise became heavier as he realized Narancia was there.

Pounding and scratching. the door trembled.

it seemed like.... fugo had deserted everything else in the room and was solely fixated on ramming the door down.

orange-plane-boy — 11/13/2021 4:35 PM

"Woah-"

The door was going to hold right?

"Ehy, Panna calm down-" he murmured "I can stay a bit more if you want to but try to not break the door ok?'

purplecraze — 11/13/2021 4:36 PM

it only became worse, accompanied by lots of screaming

orange-plane-boy — 11/13/2021 4:37 PM

Narancia made a step back

"E-Ehy- calm down...?"

purplecraze — 11/13/2021 4:40 PM

The pounding died down slowly, replaced with heavy panting, sounding lower by the door as if the monster had collapsed. he must still be fatigued from using the spell

orange-plane-boy — 11/13/2021 4:42 PM

"..." Narancia sounded worried, both for himself and Panna

The door was still up, but it still worried him.

He waited some more; because if fugo actually ended up breaking the door, going back in his room would be dangerous

purplecraze — 11/13/2021 4:44 PM

even if he sounded beyond his capabilities, there still came a soft pounding and scratching at the bottom of the door.

orange-plane-boy — 11/13/2021 4:47 PM

"Ehy..." he crouched down

"Panna, try to rest a bit please? You know you cant open it" he sighed "i miss you too, but you know we cant touch"

purplecraze — 11/13/2021 4:49 PM

in a way, monster panna was a whole lot more clear with his feelings and desires.

and then.. the strangest thing happened:

".......nA...........r.rrr..r..aa........."

orange-plane-boy — 11/13/2021 4:50 PM

"!"

Did he just...?

"Ehy, ehy sweetheart im here"

purplecraze — 11/13/2021 4:51 PM

that was the only useful information you could get out of him beyond that. just weak whimpering, screeching, and stubborn pounding on the door.

orange-plane-boy — 11/13/2021 4:52 PM

He sat down next to the door

"Mhh...Can you stop that please? Im gonna stay here but only if you dont break the door, deal?"

purplecraze — 11/13/2021 4:53 PM

Well what do you know? it cooled down to just a weak knocking

orange-plane-boy — 11/13/2021 4:57 PM

"Here, better"he smiled

"Today was fun isnt? We made our nice tree, read, made cookies..." he sighed

"I know how are you feeling right now, and really, if you didnt melted me by touch, i would be there with you aready, no matter how you look at night, you look way less scary after i saw you pass out in the snow like a dork"

purplecraze — 11/13/2021 4:59 PM

I mean, he ripped a wolf's jaw open before it had time to melt? that's a thing?

orange-plane-boy — 11/13/2021 5:00 PM

Nara is a strongly belived of the 'i can fix him' movment

purplecraze — 11/13/2021 5:01 PM

oh honey, he is SO broken....

orange-plane-boy — 11/13/2021 5:03 PM

Yeah he noticed!

Narancia yawned after a while, still chatting about nonsense

"Anyway..nh..we will find a solution ok? Someday we will be able to fell asleep in eachother's arms every night, we just need to find how"

purplecraze — 11/13/2021 5:04 PM

the scratching at the door became more rhythmic, at the same tempo he would scratch through the boy's hair on that full moon night.

orange-plane-boy — 11/13/2021 5:06 PM

Narancia smiled, placing a hand on the door

"Just be patient ok? Im sure we will manage! Someday we will be able to dance together when we want to, and like, cuddles or just hold hands"

purplecraze — 11/13/2021 5:08 PM

or Fugo can get you like that without using spells.

orange-plane-boy — 11/13/2021 5:10 PM

He yawned again

"Nh..baby its ok if i go now? Its late and the hallway its not really the warmest place"

purplecraze — 11/13/2021 5:11 PM

the room on the other side of the door was silent. no pounding, no knocking, no scratching.

orange-plane-boy — 11/13/2021 5:12 PM

He smiled "good night Panna, see you tomorrow" he standed up and sleepish got back in his room, laying on the bed and falling asleep soon after

purplecraze — 11/13/2021 5:14 PM

a knock came unusually early to Narancia's room the next day, just a bit after sunrise.

orange-plane-boy — 11/13/2021 5:14 PM

"Nh..?" Narancia rubbed his eyes and groggy got to open the door

purplecraze — 11/13/2021 5:15 PM

"oh-... sorry, did I wake you?"

orange-plane-boy — 11/13/2021 5:16 PM

"Nhh..its ok" he replied yawning

purplecraze — 11/13/2021 5:16 PM

"you're sure? I can come back later..."

orange-plane-boy — 11/13/2021 5:17 PM

"Nono, come in" he said moving from.the door to let him in

purplecraze — 11/13/2021 5:17 PM

'......alright.." the younger had a concerned frown on his face, but took the invitation and entered.

orange-plane-boy — 11/13/2021 5:18 PM

Narancia sat on the bed, waiting from the other to tell him what was up

purplecraze — 11/13/2021 5:19 PM

Fugo didn't sit down anywhere, not wanting to overstay his visit when the other was still tired. But he really felt quite concerned.

"Did....something happen, last night?"

orange-plane-boy — 11/13/2021 5:20 PM

"Mh?"

He asked still sleepy

"Uh, yeah you were more agitate than usually, but you calmed down after i chatted with you for a while, why?"

purplecraze — 11/13/2021 5:21 PM

" 'more' agitated??"

orange-plane-boy — 11/13/2021 5:22 PM

"Yeah, you tried to open the door and i had to scoild you"

purplecraze — 11/13/2021 5:22 PM

"........." Fugo looked like some things weren't adding up.

orange-plane-boy — 11/13/2021 5:23 PM

"Mh?"

purplecraze — 11/13/2021 5:23 PM

"uhm... my room, it's-.. it's fine. it's completely fine...... just the door..."

orange-plane-boy — 11/13/2021 5:24 PM

"Oh! Well, i think you felled asleep at some point; you sounded still tried for the spells you did before dinner"

purplecraze — 11/13/2021 5:25 PM

Fugo frowned troubled, not quite sure. "could... that be it?"

orange-plane-boy — 11/13/2021 5:27 PM

"Ah! I dont know if its it important, but you managed to say my name ehe, it was really raspy so im not sure i you actually did or it was another of the moans, but it was cute"

purplecraze — 11/13/2021 11:51 PM

'Cute' was honestly the last thing he'd call himself when he was like that...

"I'm not sure what I'm doing at night, so I don't know if that's out of the ordinary... you never heard something like it before?"

orange-plane-boy — 11/13/2021 11:53 PM

"Nope, you usually ignore me most of the time, but tonight you sat down next to the door whith me...but again, you sounded pretty tired. like, you made a huuge mess at the start, but then got quieter

and yes panna, he finds you cute like that too

purplecraze — 11/13/2021 11:55 PM

"well, thing is I didn't... like i was completely fixed on the door." he frowned troubled.

"it came slightly unhinged... if I hadn't exhausted myself, I might have broken through...."

orange-plane-boy — 11/13/2021 11:57 PM

"true, but you didnt!" he replied laying down, indeed still sleepy

"But ehy, at least then you rested right?"

purplecraze — 11/13/2021 11:58 PM

He nodded. "Yeah, is why I woke up so early, it seems.... ah! I'll leave you be. It's probably nothing bad, I guess..."

orange-plane-boy — 11/13/2021 11:59 PM

"Yep" he yawned; well, if you wanted to say something too late, he is aready backin the dream world

purplecraze — 11/14/2021 12:04 AM

"......." Fugo sighed and wrapped the blanket over him. He stared for a sec, hesitating...

He then returned to his own room and got his pillow.

very carefully, he used Mage Hand to pat Nara's hair so he wouldn't wake up, and lifted his head with it. He switched out Narancia's pillow for his own, stealing Narancia's pillow like that.

he sat down on the ground, hugging the pillow while looking at him, using another Mage Hand to pat the boy's hair, before his eyes fell shut for another nap too.

[slytherinshua]

THE BOYZ‼️‼️ I'M A CASUAL DEOBI, BUT I LOVE THE BOYZ i haven't listened to a lot of their songs yet, but I like watch it and I love nectar 🥹 and BACK IN THE GAME SON 🔥🔥🔥 확실한 CHANGER 🔥 I'M A I'M A I'M A MAVERICK 🗣️🗣️ I'M A I'M A I'M A MAVERICK 🗣️🗣️🗣️

Rn my bias is probably eric he's such a silly guy 🤏 and also sunwoo he is just iconic actually

Are you working on your hanbin angst is it going to rip into my soul

I don't have much planned for today, I think I'll get some work done. I have this world history assignment that I have to research for, and school restarts on 15th august for me so hahahaha

other than that I might try to cook something nice today I kind of feel like it

ALSO ZANNA DO YKU HAVE ANY SHOW/MOVIE RECS I AM LOWKEY DESPERATE 😔 idk anything fun, or gut wrenchingly sad I don't mind

-🪿

OH THE TASTE???? HELLO 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹 sometime soon i'm gonna make a the boyz guide presentation and when i do you should look at it and stan them fully 🦅🦅🦅 i'm in a debilitating the boyz era rn like its BADDD

ERIC NOOOOOOOOO ERIC IM SO FUCKING EMO HES S OSKJFDHWEUY&(@*T#^RU HES SO 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 SUNWOO??? 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 SUNWOO IS SO ICONIC 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 SUNWOO AND ERIC ARE SO ICONIC TOGETHER AS WELL THE HONEYZ IM SDKFJHEF@*YR#GUVEH IM SO SAD???? 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 okay im so sorry im just so emo for EVERY SINGLE MEMBER LEAVE ME 😞😞😞

i fear i am...... and i think it will rip into your soul...... i'm so very sorry......

omg good luck 😞😞 that sounds awful but i hope you'll slay 😞😞 my school doesn't start until sept i think but i have a whole course that i haven't even touched that i'm supposed to finish somehow... before school starts... uhhh..... so we'll see chat whether i fail or slay (i'm thinking i fail) COOKING OMG 🥹🥹🥹 i hope whatever you make turns out delicious!!!!!

HMMMMMM okay well mostly kdramas ig i have some recs off the top of my head...

doom at your service (romance, the best enemies to lovers ever, so heartbreakingly beautiful and perfect oh my god)

weak hero class 1 (kinda dark, high school setting, the best most jaw dropping acting from park jihoon, you'll be hooked every single second of every single ep it's impossible to not love this show)

move to heaven (ONLY IF YOU WANT TO FUCKING CRY but def one of my favourite shows ever its beautiful in such an indescribable way)

extraordinary attorney woo (if you want the most green flag kdrama in all of existence that is both super interesting and the romance is super cute you will come out of it ready to fight to the death for like at least 3 characters)

alchemy of souls (super long but the best kdrama in the entire world it has everything you could ever want i cannot say enough good things abt it but to put it into perspective i showed it into my mom and its her favourite show of all time she keeps talking about it to every single one of my family members and her friends like the aos agenda is REAL)

so yeah that's that for kdramas.... as for movies tbh i don't watch many :( but anything studio ghibli !!!! honestly i rarely watch stuff nowadays unless its kpop cause i haven't even been feeling like kdramas lately idk why :(( so i just watch wishies behinds and stuff instead skdjskd

[1987vampire]

Proxies x reader NSFW HCs

alot of these scenes will actually most likely end up in this story im writing lmao, so stick around if you want to see them fleshed out

Let's get the obvious beginner out of the way.

Toby is a tits man, Brian likes ass, and Tim is happy with whatever (he likes tits more he just doesn't want to be rude)

Now, let's start with Toby

Toby is the most submissive bottom you will meet in your life.

Has slipped a bit too far into subspace a few times, and you've had to stop immediately once you realized.

Motherfucker just wants to be dommed and dommed hard. Just tell him what to do, please.

Has the biggest fucking mommy kink (which contributes to his love for tits because the motherfucker will lavish those bitches like no other when given the chance)

Also has the biggest praise kink you will ever see. Has came embarrassingly fast because you called him your good boy.

99 percent of his knowledge of sex comes from porn so,, he's going to have to be retaught most everything.

Has definitely groped your tit too hard on multiple occasions because he thought it was the right thing to do.

Surprisingly good learner, though. Just wants to make you happy.

He's the best one for quickies out of all of them only because he cums extremely fast while still prioritizing you.

(He makes up for how fast he cums by how many times he can do it. Motherfucker will paint you white all over before his body gives out. Plus, his CIPA makes it to where he can't feel the burning in his legs as he fucks you for hours. Has literally kept going until his body gave out because you wanted him to.)

All the boys have very specific thoughts on oral. Toby will give or receive, whichever makes you happier, but when he's allowed to go down on you, it's like you're his last meal.

It's one of the only time's he'll disobey your commands because it doesn't matter if you've already came three times??? He's still eating, lady, shhh.

Tried to dom one (1) time. Not doing that again. Dude started crying half-way through because he thought he was hurting you and your feelings by ordering you around.

You had to pause and take a bath with him afterwards while he calmed down. He spent half the bath blubbering into your neck and apologizing more times than you could count.

Now, Brian is the exact opposite of Toby.

You asked to try and let him be the bottom a single time and he fucked you so hard you couldn't walk the next day.

A little shithead who loves blowjobs. Will give you head, but much prefers you on your knees with him stuffed so far in that he’s tapping the back of your throat and you’re gripping his thighs while he uses you for nothing more than his pleasure in the moment. 

Will mix degradation in with praise like he's been doing it his entire life. Has given you whiplash multiple times because of it.

He's so loud, too. Toby is whiny and begs, but this dude is in your ear with low grunts and groans, his voice spilling the foulest words he can think of.

Has you seeing stars while mumbling into your neck shit like "your pretty little pussy's taking me so well - like you were built to be my cocksleeve. Just a cumslut who takes whatever I give you. Look at you, all fucked out of your mind, pretty little baby. Can't wait to paint your fuckin' insides. It's what whores like you deserve."

He's also the best at aftercare, though. You normally have to take care of Toby after, and Tim does jack shit unless needed.

Brian, though, has his dresser packed with shit to take care of you with after. Will bathe you, dress you, tell you little reassurances, make sure you're okay.

He's also best at knowing when to stop. He can sense your hesitation as if he's the one feeling it.

Because of his dirty mouth, he's had to break off sessions early a few times. The biggest was when you started crying halfway through him fucking you missionary, and not the kind of crying he liked (because let's be real, this motherfucker loves to see you cry and beg to cum.)

He had called you a whore a few too many times through the session, and you had taken it a bit too close to heart (it was something that hit a bit harder than needed since you were dating multiple men at once.)

He spent the whole night cuddling you and reassuring you that he didn't really mean it. He loved you, they all did, it was just for the roleplay. "Stop crying, pretty baby, we're okay. I'm not actually mad. Let me see a smile, c'mon, doll."

Also, let me mention that because y'all are so fucking loud, Tim has banged on the door quite a few times trying to get you to calm down.

Tim made the mistake of grumbling to himself during dinner one time in front of you and Brian that 'you're so fucking loud it sounds like you're recording a goddamn porno in there.'

If you hadn't been choking on your food so hard, you might have noticed the sly grin that crossed Brian's face, though it was brought back later when he ended up filming you quite a few times from that night. It wouldn't be posted anywhere - fuck that, you were theirs, and no one else's.

(he did accidentally share a video of you cumming to the group chat all four of you were in on accident while sending cute pictures of the two of you. The mortification of hearing your moans come through the speaker of Toby's phone while he stared at it dumbfounded was enough for you to not talk to Brian for a whole week. It didn't matter if they had seen you like that before, it was still embarrassing!)

(Brian didn't tell you that the other two - Tim especially - had been sent worse videos than that.)

SPEAKING OF TIM.

Let's get started with this man. Tim is the laziest motherfucker known to man but it is nice. 

Really, he’s not lazy, he’s just tired a lot, and he doesn’t want to put the effort in the fuck you senseless when you’ve got two others for that. 

He prefers sleepy fucking where you’re both half-out-of-it and breathless. He enjoys both of you on your sides with him spooning you, his hips moving just enough to give enough friction for the both of you to cum after a while. You can and will fall alseep right after with him still buried inside of you.

Speaking of, what’s the best way to get y’all’s sexual tension out while still being lazy (besides just making you ride him which he does very often) ? Cockwarming. 

He won’t even just do it in bed when it’s the two of you. He’s shimmied his pants down just enough for his cock to slip out and pushed your panties aside (since you were only wearing an oversized shirt and underwear. I mean, what did you think would happen?) and made you sit on him in the middle of the living room while the other two were lounging around, too distracted to notice. 

However, if someone does notice (Especially in the beginning because you were horrible at hiding your flushed cheeks and heavy breathing from understimulation) he would not hide it.

“H-hey, y/-y/n, what’s-sss-s with the f-fa-face?” Toby had asked innocently one night while you were all watching TV together. You knew Tim was smirking behind you as he lifted the hem of the big shirt just enough to let Toby know what was going on. Boy blushed so hard and covered his eyes, smacking his face harshly in the process, and Tim and Brian snickered (because of course Brian already knew.)

Cockwarming also means that the second you finally - finally - start fucking, it’s over for the two of you in less than a minute, your fingers clawing at him as you finally get your release after hours. (the longest he’s made the two of you wait was four hours because we’re watching Toby’s favorite movies, we can’t interrupt him, now can we, darlin’?’

He’s also a huge fan of facesitting. Not the biggest fan of receiving blowjobs only because it makes him feel too vulnerable, but he could have you sit on his face for hours and not complain, his hands gripping your ass tight enough to leave bruises as he laved his tongue over your clit over and over. 

The only - only - times Tim has fucked you rough was when it wasn’t even really him. You had been half-asleep with your back to him one time as he rutted into you slowly when you suddenly felt yourself flipped so you were ass up with your face being pushed into the mattress, his hips jutting at a speed you didn’t know he could reach.

You didn’t even have to look back to know that Masky - his alter that didn’t show himself too often around you - had taken over. 

During getting fucked that time by Masky, you ended up so deep in subspace, trying to please the man you didn’t get too see that often that you let him him rip orgasm after orgasm from you until you couldn’t think straight and you entered a space where all you felt was pleasure, and you couldn’t even see straight.

You were brought out of it by Tim pressing a cold rag to your forehead, whispering sweet nothings to you as he tried to get you to come to, apologizing profusely for letting it happen. You had just grinned and - though your voice was thoroughly fucked up from screaming - told him to let Masky know he could do that again any time. Tim had gotten so flustered that he walked out of the room for a few minutes. 

Speaking of alters real quick.

Tim and Brian are the only ones to have them - Masky and Hoody respectfully, of course - and they come out around you very little. Hoody comes out more than Masky though, and you can tell the difference in how quiet Brian will get. 

Hoody and Masky have fucked you both separately and together (so have Tim and Brian but we’ll get to that in a second)

Masky loves you ass and prefers to have you in doggystyle over anything while Brian’s love for blowjobs is only intensified in his alter who will have you gagging on him until you almost pass out. He’ll give you a moment to breathe in just a second, just hold on a little longer, okay?

Hoody is almost always silent besides grunts that let him communicate with Masky. This is apparent even when you’re not fucking, and the three of you have to teach yourselves how to decipher the man’s made up language. 

Masky is quiet too, but will grumble to himself more than anything, calling you the worst name’s he can think of while he slams into you so hard that you don’t even have to move yourself to give Hoody a proper blowjob, his grip on your hips and force of his thrusts are enough to have you bouncing back and forth quickly. 

It’s not like you could really move anyways, not when Masky’s picking you up by your thighs and holding your hips up as he plows into you.

They love spitroasting but have definitely done double penetration even if you complain that you’re not prepped. Who cares? You’re obviously ready for it, look at you already cumming even though they haven’t moved. 

Now, as for threesomes and or foursomes

Nine times out of ten, Toby is too embarrassed to do anything in front of the other two. Maybe if you coax him enough, reassure him that nobody will judge, he might join in for the night, but it’s an incredibly rare occurrence. Watching Brian boss you around is enough to make him squirm. You were supposed to be in change, not him? But there you were with your tongue sticking out as you rolled your hips against Tim, ready to fit either of them in your mouth. The other can always take another hole. 

Toby not wanting to join doesn’t really both the other two though, and though it’s still not as common to have a threesome compared to one on one, Tim and Brian are always ready to share. Especially when you look so pretty whining into the air as you take both of them at once. 

You don’t mind if Brian takes a few photos, right? I mean, just look at you! This is a perfect moment to capture. Ignore the fact that you’re now Tim’s home screen, your pretty tits out in the open as his cock is buried inside of you, Brian’s hand gripping the flesh of your hip. Why wouldn’t he want to see it all the time?

The same applies to them as their alters. Spitroasting is their absolute favorite, though Tim prefers it if you ride him while you slobber all over Brian instead of him having to use his energy to fuck you into oblivion. 

They love double penetration as well, but once they tried to fit both of them in your pussy instead of one in your ass and you came so hard that you passed out. It’s brought out on special occasions after a l o t of prep.

really, overall. you have a boy for whatever mood you're in and you're literally never horny because the second you mention it someone is on top of you.

[delicrieux]

☆ﾐ 𝚖𝚊𝚔𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚜𝚊𝚢 “𝚘𝚑”

PART 10: BIG DICK IS BACK IN TOWN

y/n is back in brooklyn for the holidays. thinking that a stream will make her feel less homesick for cali, she starts working on her famously titled hentai.free.srv. what was supposed to be a relaxing stream turns into a special delivery about two hours in.

─── corpse husband x reader ─── soc. media + written fiction! ─── word count: 2.2k ─── ❥ req: Here's one... You know those apps for delivery like Domino's or whatnot... What if reader is streaming Among Us with Corpse, and reader mentions they're hungry and Corpse offers to order them food, and readers like no no it's fine... Then there's delivery at the door (Corpse ordered beforehand) 

author’s note: fucky format is also back in town baby!!! also if you find any mistakes - no u didnt <3 thank u everyone for enjoying this story sm i literally cant believe how feral yall going strawberry cow was a nuclear explosion im still recovering tbh. got an ask a while ago and decided to incorporate it into myso. happy holidays everyone! myso will continue on monday!

ultimate masterlist.  ҉  myso masterlist   ҉   previous.  ҉   next.

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Indeed, being soft on any social media platform was the biggest disgrace and needed to be eliminated post haste. Moreover, it was a slippery slope - once you start flooding your timeline with cute imagery and heart emojis, what will stop you from posting inspirational Facebook quotes? Disgusting. If Rae were here, she would chide you (not you thinking about her as if she’s dead or something). For once in your life, you feel like you deserve it. 

Alas, you hope this little chaos you’ve caused is enough to throw everyone off. The stans, especially. You know the hashtags, you’ve seen ARMY scourging for info online with the same fervor and ruthlessness 1 Direction fans hacked airport security cameras just to spy on the boys. If you had any dirty secrets online, they are out to the public now - thankfully, besides the Harry Styles stan account (with edits and all), you have nothing. Though, now that you think about it, exposed nudes would have been better than your Punk!Harry edit receiving almost a million views. God, your life’s a fucking mess.

Your fans aren’t the only ones out for info - you, too, are trying to decipher Rae’s message. Code: Barbecue Sauce. The two of you had come up with it roughly two years ago, around the same time when you promised that if you didn’t find significant others by the time you’re 40, you’ll just marry each other. It was one of the many rules found in your friendship codex. Barbecue Sauce signifies information - an exchange of information. And depending on how it ends or begins (”So I’m sitting there” alludes to Rae, “On my titties” alludes to you), secret data on that person is given away, usually free of charge. 

But why? And to whom did Rae give away what? You had pestered her mercilessly and even sent some voice messages where you were crying. You were only crying because of a video of a grandpa smiling you saw on TikTok, but you are a snake, and so you put those tears to good use. If streaming doesn’t work out, you’ll just become an actress. Hollywood would love you. Your PR firm sure as fuck wouldn’t, though.

Rae was having none of it. She said you’ll figure it out eventually. Told you to channel your superior puzzle skills. You were quick to remind her that you can barely count to ten without having an aneurysm. Oddly serious, she admitted that she worries for you sometimes. Why only sometimes?! you demanded. She merely sighed. uttering under her breath something that sounded closely to “Boke.”

You leave her for barely a week and she’s already neck deep in the gay volleyball anime, hoodie and cardboard cutout and everything. Your life is falling apart.

But Brooklyn is nice. It had snowed when you stepped off of the plane. Thousands of snowflakes sprinkling into your hair, dotting your cheeks and nose. You missed this sight back in Cali. You missed your parents, too. 

Home cooked meals, old sweaters, your old room and about 40GB worth of old high school pictures on your computer. You went through them all one night. Some were stomach churning, cringe inducing nightmares. You were especially fond of those. Texted some of your friends that were still in Brooklyn, met up, decided to bake. Bad idea, Rae was the resident chef back in Cali. Besides laughing till your stomach hurt, and almost burning down your kitchen, nothing all that significant happened. Somewhere down the line, at about 3 am, half-way through a cheesy rom-com you had the overwhelming urge to text Corpse.

That’s where the problems really started. God, you missed California, missed being in the same timezone with a guy you hadn’t even met yet, how embarrassing is that?! You missed skating around and taking pictures of the beach in the setting sun, sending it to him, silently wishing he was with you to admire the view. 

You really want to call him. And to hang out with him. But for some reason, the thought of that springs up immediate anxiety and you shy away from asking. Him sending you cute good morning texts doesn’t help, either. Maybe it’s better he doesn’t know that you’re a blushing, stuttering mess each time you read “baby”. 

Late evening. Your stream is already set up, people are slowly trickling in and you greet them with a grin and a soft “Hello! Hi hi!”. You did your best to make your room a perfectly chaotic backdrop - led lights, an embarrassing amount of anime merch and plushies. You always try to balance out your weeb side by dressing hot as fuck for your streams - today’s inspiration just so happens to be egirls. Mostly because you watched one too many egirl make-up tutorials on TikTok, and also because you’ve been listening to Corpse’s song all day.

Yeah, no, who are you kidding, you dressed up this way because you were hoping Corpse was watching your stream. You didn’t forget your cat headphones, either. You know he likes them. You want to make him suffer. Perhaps then, finally, he will ask you out, so you wouldn’t have to.

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“I feel like,” You start when you put away your phone, staring idly at the chat, “I feel like I need a new name for you guys. Calling you guys after two years of streaming is just... weird, no? I also don’t respect men so I don’t want to call you guys. Like, so many creator’s have, like, a name for their fans. Uhm, Cody Ko has the chodesters, Kurtis Conner has, uh, folks? Kurtis Town? Citizens! Markiplier has mommy issues--” You can’t help snorting, “So, I’ve been, like, thinking - I know, shocking! - so I was thinking I’m gonna name you cockroaches. Because you’re grimy little shits impossible to kill. And also then I can use the legendary Minaj meme ROACHES!”

Your stream enthusiastically echoes ROACHES, making the chat swim. Yes, if anyone would enjoy such a name, it would be your audience. You’re as equally proud as you are disturbed.

“Well, anyway.” Leaning back into your chair, you throw your arms out with a bright grin, “Big dick is back in town, baby! If you noticed the backdrops different, it’s cuz I’m in Brooklyn now. Don’t ask me when I will return to Always Sunny, I don’t plan that far ahead.”

While Minecraft boots up, you decide to answer a few questions.

r u dating sykkuno?

You want to smack your head into the keyboard, but as it is, you can’t exactly afford a new one, so you refrain, “No, Sykkuno and I are not dating, we are just good friends. Uhm, I’m not sure how much I’ll have to repeat this, but, we really aren’t, so if the roaches could chill - Oh my God, that sounds so stupid, I love it - uh, yeah, if the roaches could chill that’d be great.”

the roaches lmao sounds like we’re a sports team

“Oh shit, yeah it does, uh-- maybe I can make like, jerseys or something. That’d be cool, I think.”

how disappointed are your parents with the way your life turned out?

“My parents are actually not disappointed at all!” You say with a cute little smile, “Uhm, they’re both really proud, actually. They’re glad I found something I love doing and made a job outta it. Dad finds my Youtube videos endearing. Yes, they watch pretty much all of my videos, unless I explicitly tell them not to. And yeah, with all the fucks and thirsting for anime characters. Uhm, it was very embarrassing at first, but I mean, after a while, shame just...doesn’t exist anymore, I guess? Funny thing about my parents, actually, when they watch my videos-” You eye catches a comment, “Oh! No, they only watch my Youtube videos. They don’t know how to use Twitter, thank God. Uhm, anyway-- when they hear a name they don’t know, like, I dunno, Dabi, or something, they google--” You’re grinning by now, eyes crinkling, giggling softly, “--who that is, and buy me like, merch and stuff. It’s really cute. 

can i be adopted by ur parents plz

will you and corpse ever collab?!

You were about to answer, though the man of the hour himself decides to do it for you.

Corpse_Husband: yes.

Okay, not to say your heart skipped a beat, but it totally did. With a pleased smile, you nod, like one of those bobble head toys sold at the dollar store. The motion is oddly reminiscent of Sykkuno’s own nod. Perhaps you had picked it up from him. The chat seems to notice.

pack it up, sykkuno

More questions pile about this mysterious collab you and Corpse are planning. Yeah, you’d like to hear more about it, too, since he single highhandedly decided one was happening right now. Corpse remains silent. Fine, keep your secrets. 

“Okay, guys, oh, I mean, roaches, Oh my God--” You’re covering your mouth, giggling, “-calling all roaches, calling all roaches, calm down. Everyone grab a snack and a blanket I’m turning up the music volume so we can all chill. Entering chill zone. Entering chill zone. Roaches, prepare.”

we are prepared

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An hour or so passes and you grow hungry. It shows with the amount of cakes you had baked in your server. Currently, you find yourself throwing eggs at the wall of one of the renovated houses, your face scrunched in concentration and slight frustration. 24 of the 50 eggs have been wasted. “What’s a girl gotta do to get some chicks around here?” you had uttered under your breath, until, finally, a screech - the egg finally spawns a mob. Your mouth falls open, “Aww, look!” You approach it, so small, walking in zigzags beside you, “It’s a baby chicken! Die, bitch.” The baby chicken is no more as you swing your bedazzled (you have mods) diamond sword. You’re cackling by the time the dust settles.

y/n is a child murderer

“Roaches,” You address your fan-base, spurring another fit of laughter - you can’t get over the name, “I think I’m like, forgetting that eating in Minecraft won’t actually make less hungry in real life.”

take a break and go eat queen <3

“Fuck no, we starve and die like men. Now I actually really need another chicken.”

Another twenty minutes trickle by and you’re trying to lure back a panda from the jungle when there’s a knock on your bedroom’s door. Whipping your head to the side, you slide down your headphones. At the same time, your mom pokes her head through the ajar door, “MOM!” You scream, “Get OUT of my room I’m playing Minecraft!” But your yell has no actual bite to it, as you don’t manage to hide your smile. Your mom laughs, doing some sort of sign language and motioning for you to follow her with her head. That or it’s some sort of performative dance. 

“I’m live right now,” You tell her, pointing at your screen. She knows this already, though, “do you want to say hi?” 

The roaches spam the chat with friendly hellos. You mom, quite impatient now, waves you over. 

“Sorry, roaches, mom needs something. Be back in a bit!”

Stopping the stream, you rush out of your seat and pleased she slinks into the hallway. “What’s this about?”

“Your pizza came.”

“My what now?” You echo, confused.

“Domino’s. You ordered pizza?”

“What? No? I was busy with the stream, I never--”

Thankfully, you had managed to grab your phone from your room before you exited. You almost choke on spit once you read the messages.

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You decide that it’ll be impossible to stream after experiencing what you had just experienced. You tweet out a quick apology to the roaches (God, that fucking name) and say that you had a breakdown but you’re okay. That is as a close to the truth as you managed to muster. It’s a sad sight, chewing and crying; your mom winced when she saw your state - disheveled hair and rundown eyeliner and everything. “D’aww,” She had muttered, caressing the top of your head, “don’t cry my little raccoon.”

If anyone was ever to ask you where did your chaotic nature come from, you’d answer with my mom. To make yourself feel better, you took a selfie - duck face and peace sign and the horrible 2000′s angle. Sent it to Rae. 

looking hot, her message read. 

thanks, was all you replied with.

You couldn’t just leave things as they were. Once you calmed down, you wanted to text Corpse, but how would you follow up the ungodly caps lock and screeching? Impossible. An idea sprung to mind, one that was brave. Taking the first step.

Instead of sending a text, you sent a voice memo.

“Thank you for the pizza, it was delicious.”

You voice still sounded a bit raspy. His reply was instant. Your heart skipped a beat. He sent a voice memo back.

“Glad you liked it, baby.”

He was going to be the death of you.

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tags (in italics is those i couldn’t tag! make sure all’s ok w your settings!) : @littlebabysandboxburritos - @fairywriter-oracle - @tsukishimawh0re - @ofstarsanddreams - @bbecc-a - @annshit - @leahh19 - @letsloveimagines - @bellomi-clarke - @wineandionysus - @guiltydols - @onephootinfrontoftheother - @liamakorn - @thirstyfangirl - @lilysdaydreams - @pan-ini - @mxqicshxp - @tanchosanke - @yoshinorecommends - @flightsandfantasy - @liljennyx3 - @slashersdream - @unknown-and-invisible - @sinister-sleep - @fivedicksinatrenchcoat - @mercury–moon - @peterparkerspjsuit - @unstableye - @simonsbluee - @shinyshimaagain - @ppopty - @siriuslystupid - @crapimahuman - @ofthedewthesunlight - @mythicalamphitrite - @artsyally - @corpsesimpp - @corpsewhitetee - @corpse-husbandsimp - @hyp-oh-critical - @roses-and-grasses - @rhyrhy462 - @sparklylandflaplawyer - @charbkgo - @airwaveee - @creativedogs - @kaitlyn2907 - @loxbbg - @afuckingunicornn - @fleurmoon - @yeolliedokai - @truly-dionysus - @multi-fandom-central707

more tags are in the comments bcs tumblr only allows me to tag 50 people max 💙

[idy-ll-ique]

Voices.

Pairing: Chris Evans x F!Reader

Genre: nothing but floofy-floof

Warnings: none

Requested: nope

Summary: in which you can hear the voice of your soulmate in your head and Y/N's soulmate is someone really special— her celebrity crush.

Author's Note: Hiya peeps! do y'all know how long ago I wrote this fic, like— at least 2 years ago. damn. so in advance, im sorry if there are any grammatical mistakes or bad punctuation in the fic that I forgot to correct (apology for bad english 😌)

oh and

bold/italics - chris

only italics - y/n

---

Hey, you still there?

Y/N snapped out of a trance and focused on the voice. Yeah, yeah I'm still there, she thought to herself. She was hearing the voice of her soulmate, or rather, was speaking to him, telepathically. The thing is, you could hear the voice of your soulmate in your head. You could talk, hold conversations, but the only thing was that you couldn't ask for their name.

You had to guess. Most of the people made plans, like let's meet here or there and concentrate hard enough, I'll see your name written on a paper. It was a thing, I mean, if you concentrated hard enough, you could see what your soulmate was doing. It was like a cheat code of sorts. Most of them found their soulmate in that way.

You see, Y/N loved surprises, so she wasn't going to find her soulmate just yet. Y/N wanted to figure it out for herself. Your soulmate couldn't hear every single one of your thoughts, though (which was how she had zoned out mid-conversation). Listen, we should meet up sometime.

Aw, already? she thought with a pout on her lips. Yes, I'm very excited to meet you, I've been waiting for too long, the voice replied, chuckling. It was a manly voice, really deep and raspy. She loved it. When Y/N was small, about 4-5 years old, all she could hear were swear words and dirty thoughts; characteristics of a teenage boy.

From that, she inferred, that soulmate was much older than her, about 8-9 years older than her. She didn't mind, She was kind of into older guys anyway… But I like this game we have! Why do you want to ruin it? she asked, shaking her head. Alright, sweetheart, just for you, I'm holding back. But I don't have much patience, the voice laughed. Y/N smiled.

Without even meeting her, Chris loved the voice in his head. She sounded so sweet and welcoming, maybe she was younger than him. He couldn't wait to meet her. Chris had tried to plan their meeting for so long now, but she just wouldn't give in. She was also a feisty one. He smiled to himself as he walked down the street, engaged in thoughts about his soulmate.

In his haste, he accidentally bumped into someone. "I'm so sorry!" he blurted out, instead hearing a soft ouch, shit in his head. His brows furrowed. The lady he had bumped into just kept on walking. Are you alright? he asked his soulmate in his mind. Yeah, just bumped into someone while walking.

I bumped into someone just now too! he told her excitedly, still staring at the lady who had now stopped in her tracks. She turned around, scanning the crowd. Then she looked at him, but maybe she didn't realize that she had bumped into him. Holy shit, I see— Then it all went blank. See what? Chris questioned desperately.

He still wasn't sure whether the woman he had just bumped into was his soulmate or not.

Why can't I say the name of the guy who played the role of Captain America?

Chris froze and stared at the lady, jaw dropped. She was lost in her thoughts, confused. He slowly walked to her and stood in front of her; she stared back at him, her heart racing. This was her celebrity crush, who was currently looking at her as if she hung the moon. But why? Why was he looking at her like that?

"You can't say his name because that's me, you technically can't say his name because you aren't allowed to," Chris whispered to her, smiling softly. Her eyes widened.

"You! You're the voice I hear in my mind! Chris freaking Evans is my soulmate?! How did I not realize?!" The woman exclaimed, shocked. Soon though, she got a wide smile on her face. His eyes widened too, hers was the voice he heard as well! "What's your name?" he asked her as they hugged. "I'm Y/N Y/L/N," she replied, smiling.

"Wanna join me for a coffee?" he offered, holding his hand out. She put her palm on top of his and nodded. Both of them entered a nearby coffee shop. "So, what do you do?" he asked her after ordering two coffees. "Nothing. I'm unemployed right now, just got out of my last job. I gave an interview yesterday at Ralph Lauren, just waiting for a call back," she shrugged.

"Oh, into fashion?" he asked her, smiling. "Yeah, got my degree and all. Just needed a job, Ralph Lauren offers a good amount of money," she chuckled. Chris smiled again. "Reminds me of Rachel Green." She laughed more, which warmed his heart. Her laugh was adorable. Suddenly, her phone rang and she looked at him, wide-eyed.

He nodded dismissively and she picked up the call. She spoke for a while and when she ended the call, she had the biggest smile on her face.

"I got the job at Ralph Lauren, I'm starting tomorrow!" Y/N squealed. They couldn't have picked a better timing. "Congratulations, Y/N!" he told her, grinning. After spending some more time at the cafe, they parted ways. She went home while he went back to the sets where they were filming Avengers: Age of Ultron.

"Hi Chris, you were out for a long time, what's up?" Chris Hemsworth asked, smiling at Chris Evans as they stumbled upon each other. "Nothing, just met my soulmate, had a cup of coffee with her." The older Chris feigned nonchalance. "You what?! That's awesome, man! So, how is she, what does she do?" Hemsworth asked him excitedly as both of them walked inside.

Robert and Scarlett were there, talking. "She's so beautiful, I stopped functioning when I saw her. She works at Ralph Lauren, she's a fashion designer," Chris told him with a smile. Robert and Scarlett looked up. "Who?" Scarlett questioned. "Y/N," he said simply, sitting beside Robert. "Who's that?" Robert inquired. "My soulmate." Chris smiled, as if in a trance.

"Boy, you look like you're in love," Scarlett laughed. "Because I am, she's that beautiful," he told her adamantly. "Whoa, did you ask her out?" Robert snorted. "I'm back from our first date." We had our first date right now, didn't we? he asked her in his mind.

Of course we did, I loved it. Hope to meet you again soon, her voice replied and he could practically feel her smile.

Sure, I'm in town for a few more months, I'll mind-text you as to when I'm free, he told her, sporting a smile on his face. She outright laughed in the comfort of her own home. Mind-text? Sounds fun, she agreed and focused on the Netflix series she was watching, turning off the "magical telepathic link" between them.

Chris, too, focused on the others only to see them smiling at him. "Talking to her?" He nodded at Scarlett. A few minutes later, all of them went to another room to begin with the shooting of a new scene.

---

Y/N danced as she prepared dinner, singing along to You Don't Know Me by Jax Jones. It had been a month since she last saw Chris. He had promised her a date, but he didn't get time. She couldn't blame him, he was a busy man. Y/N was shouting the lyrics of the song in her head, unaware of the fact that Chris was snooping in on her mind.

Hey, calm down, she heard Chris chuckling in her mind and shrieked in real life. What are you— are you snooping on my mind? Chris! she thought, scandalized. He laughed more. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I wanted to ask you out. Are you free right now? We could meet in the same coffee shop, he asked. She grinned and nodded to herself. Of course, I'll be there in 15.

She quickly got dressed, wearing a pair of track pants and a t-shirt (like she was wearing on their first date). She didn't bother with her hair or makeup, it looked good anyway, she just bolted out of the house. Y/N entered the coffee shop to see Chris already sitting there, wearing a suit. She cursed herself mentally, making Chris look up.

He stifled a laugh. She went and sat in front of him.

"I'm so sorry I look like a single mother of two kids who hasn't slept in a year," she moaned, "I didn't know you were gonna show up in a suit." She facepalmed for good measure. "It's quite alright, you look beautiful. I wouldn't have you any other way, I should say. I'm coming back from a party right now, therefore the suit."

She blushed softly at his compliment. He ordered two coffees for them and they started talking. "So, how's your job at Ralph Lauren?" Chris asked, smiling at her. "It's amazing, I got promoted. Now I'm the head of the department, with my own office and all," she told him, smiling back. "That's great! Oh, congratulations, honey," he grinned.

"Thanks," she muttered, blushing slightly when he called her a nickname. "You look cute while blushing, has anyone ever told you that?" Chris winked as their coffees arrived. "No one, ever. I don't interact with people much, it's a tedious job," she half-joked, smiling.

"Really! So who are the people you talk to?" he joined in. "Well, there's my assistant, my mother, my bro and you. That's all. I've got some friends, but I rarely talk to them, only on the phone while texting, that is," she shrugged. "Nice, nice," he nodded as they finished their coffees. "Allow me to drop you home," Chris offered, taking out a key which she found out was for his bike as they left the café.

"No it's alright, I'll go," she refused immediately. "Nonsense, you're practically my girlfriend! I'm going with ya," he shook his head. They looked like an odd couple; one wearing a suit while the other looked like she had just woken up. Surprisingly enough, the one who looked like she just woken up had the best fashion sense among them. "Hop on," Chris grinned.

She sat down behind him, wrapping her arms around his waist. Both of them chatted for the 2 minutes that took them to get to Y/N's home. Once they reached her building, she got down from Chris's bike and turned to him.

"Thanks, Chris, this has been an amazing second date. Can't wait for the third," she told him with a smile. "Me too," he smiled back. A few seconds later, she turned to leave but Chris suddenly grabbed her hand, turning her around. "Wha—" She didn't get to finish her sentence as Chris pressed his lips to hers. She kissed back, wrapping her arms around his neck.

"I just had to, sweetheart," he panted as they pulled away from each other, breathless. "Wow," she breathed out as Chris rested his forehead against hers. "So, um, see you on the third date, yeah?" Y/N giggled as they stepped away from one another, smiling. "I'll make it as quick as possible. Can't stay away from you, darling," he winked.

"How flattering," she winked back and turned to leave, purposely adding a sway to her hips knowing that he was watching. And fuck, was he watching. "Oh, the things you do to me, my dear Y/N."

"I heard that!"

"Good!"

---

A/N: Thanks for reading, leave a like if you enjoyed!

[hoodieofholland]

hey love. I’m obsessed with mob!tom - could you write something where mob Tom and the reader have a really big fight and Tom says something that was really mean and reader storms out and doesn’t come back until late and night and Tom is super worried :) at the beginning angst and at the end fluff.

I actually asked other writers too to write this a while ago but nobody does it and I found your account now and I’m so in love with your writing you are super talented <3

Sorry if my English is not really good- it’s not my first language

A/n: dear anon, you were reading my mind! I was actually procrastinating with a draft of some angst with mob!tom for a while, and you just motivated me to write it again hahah im obsessed with mob!tom too btw, no shame on this lol. Thanks for requesting, hope you like it!

Masterlist Request/tell me your thoughts on this

Warnings bellow the cut!

Warnings: angst, language, mention of gun.

You throw your purse over the table as you storm inside the house, walking up to your room with a stern face, straightened back and confident steps, without saying a word. Tom watched you from behind, sighing as he knew what was about to come - you were pissed.

He followed you slowly, not wanting to hurry the fight that was about to come. He knew pretty well what he has done tonight, but wasn’t planning on apologize, as he was also sure he wasn’t wrong about it.

By the time he reached the main room, you were already in the closet, taking off your jewels and putting them inside their boxes. “Baby”, he called you, but you didn’t raise your head.

Your gesturing was obviously stating your humor - or the lack of it. You wasn’t being so careful with the expensive belongings, as you always made sure to be.

“Baby”, Tom tried again, sighing this time, “Can you at least tell me what the hell did I do?”

That was the breakpoint. You lifted your head to look at him sternly. “Seriously? You gonna really act like you don’t know?”

He snorts, running a hand through his brown curls. “I mean, I know. I just don’t get why you’re so upset about it”

You laugh humorless. “I’m upset ‘cause you fucking treated me like a doll, Tom. That’s why I’m upset about it!”

“What?”, he snapped, narrowing his eyes. “What the fuck, I just told that asshole of a waiter to get his shit together instead of eye-fucking you. For God’s sake, what’s wrong with that?”

"Well, maybe the fact that you made a scene in front of the manager because you were jealous?" You shout, shaking your hands. "Should I tell you the obvious fact that this man is probably fired now because of your speech?".

Tom was growing mad. He couldn't believe you were defending the guy who was flirting with you the whole dinner.

Turns out that what was supposed to be a calm and relaxing dinner quickly became something distasteful, as Tom took notice of the waiter that was serving your table that night looking at you with a dumb smile on his face the entire time. He could even see the guy talking to some other workers about you, staring at you like you were some kind of meal. So Tom did what he thought was right - he made it very clear that you were his girl and a employee shouldn't be looking at you like that.

"I don't give a single fuck if he's unemployed right now. He should take this as a lesson to not disrespect you or any other woman in his workplace", Tom said, undoing his tie and throwing it in anywhere in the wardrobe. He was tired and pissed with the whole situation - and, more important, with you, for making a big deal out of it.

"Disrespect me, or disrespect you, Tom?", you snap, eyes wide with anger. "Cause it didn't look like you were worried about me. Cause all I wanted was a peaceful dinner with my boyfriend, who actually never seems to be available to me, and you made it pretty hard for me to enjoy, just because you were mad for a guy possibly be flirting with your girl! Like I fucking belonged to you!"

"Oh, fuck off, y/n", he hissed, walking past the closet's door and going straight to the bathroom. "It's obvious I'd be pissed for the it too. You're my girl, and I don't think it's nice if other man look at you like that! Don't act like you've never done it too".

You followed him, yelling next. "Shit, you're unbelievable! What is it? Nobody can look at Tom Holland's girl? Because you're the great motherfucker mobster and I'm your fucking prize?"

Tom turned his body to glance at you again. He pointed a finger at you, eyes serious and penetrating. "I've never said it. That's not how I see this".

"Oh, really? So you care to explain me why do you keep doing that? We barely spend time together now, Tom, and when we finally get to have a nice night out, you make sure to state that I'm yours and that no other man can lay an eye on me", you sniff, unable to keep the cracked voice from coming out and show how upset you felt about it. "I don't like to feel that I'm waiting for you like a goddamn doll, Tom".

"Well, darling, I'm sorry if I'm not being enough, but that's how real world works", his voice is cold and he is avoiding looking into your eyes, his jaw clenched in a way that make it clear that he's not satisfied with the conversation's rumor. "I made it pretty clear when we first met that my job doesn't allow me to be here the entire time, so what the fuck do you expect me to do? Or do you think that this nice house and the maids, and all the fucking jewels I give you come for free? Tell me, y/n, what the hell you want from me?"

You watch his usually soft features whenever you were around turning into the one he used with his men. The veins in his neck visible, his pupils huge and thin lips trembling with anger. Tom has never spoken to you that way, and you could feel the pressure on your chest with the pain from his harsh words.

A couple of tears rolled down your cheeks and you were quick to rub them away with the back of your hand. Noticing the way you pressed your lips together lightly, Tom's face softened and he realized his posture and tone.

"I don't- I don't know, Tom", you say in a low, croaky voice. "Think I just wanted us to be a couple. I'm truly sorry if that's too much to ask you for".

His heart pained at your words and he took a few steps in your direction. "Darling, no, that's not what I-"

You stopped him, putting your arm in front of you and shaking your head. "No, that's exactly what you wanted to say. I don't know what I had in mind when we started dating, nor what I was thinking when I agreed to move in here, but I don't want to be between you and your job anymore".

He stared at you, unaware of what you were about to do, thinking about what to say. He didn't want to fight with you like that, but didn't want you to think that what you've said is true neither.

You walked past him and straight to the closet again, picking up your suitcase and grabbing a few clothes from the wardrobe. Tom watched you for a few seconds, startled, and then started to panic.

"What are you doing?"

You ignored him, trying to think what you'd possibly need to get to stay out tonight. You could get the rest of your things later, but right now you just wanted to get out of that house.

"Y/n, love, what are you doing?" He asked in desperation, reaching your arm and trying to pull you away from the wardrobe, but you just shrugged his touch off.

"What does it look like? I'm leaving, Tom! If you can't conciliate our relationship with your job, then I guess I have nothing to do here anymore". You say through gritted teeth.

"What?!" He breathed out. "Darling, you can't leave like-"

"Don't you fucking call me darling!"

Tom stops and stares at you, blinking. His mouth is agape, trying to get his thoughts together. You didn't stop packing, and when he saw the determination in your actions, he simply couldn't contain the anger growing on his chest.

"Know what? Go. Leave me! Get the fuck out of this house. I don't fucking care!" He yelled, and you jumped slightly at the sound of his guttural voice.

You wiped some of new tears and nodded once, not minding to get anything else as you closed your suitcase and walked out of the room, hands shaking from the emotions you were so hardly trying to refrain.

But before you could step out of the room and go down on the stairs, you turn around to see he stagnant at the same spot. "Fuck you, Tom. You can take all this damn jewelry. Take this, the clothes, and everything else you bought me. If I can't have you, these don't mean a single thing to me. I'm not a fucking doll, Tom".

You left, and he couldn't move for minutes straight.

*********

The night passed by and Tom didn't hear from you. He checked his phone more times than he liked to admit, but you didn't answer any calls, any messages. Nothing. He didn't even realize what time he fell asleep on the couch, waiting for some sort of sign from you, but in the morning, when he rolled out of it, his heart pounded in his chest at the realization that you were nowhere to be seen.

He asked Harrison, his best mate and the second person you most chatted with in the house, if he has seen you, but he didn't have anything. So Tom waited, trying to focus on his work for the morning and the evening, as he thought that maybe you just wanted some time to think clearer. He regretted saying those things to you already, knowing that none of that was true. Obviously he did care if you were there in the morning. He wanted to wake up with you by his side like every other day. It was all that mattered for him after all. Not the money, not the jewel, not the house. It all didn't make sense when you weren't there.

And he felt so sick thinking that you truly believed he was seeing you as a prize, as a doll that would stand beautifully waiting for him at the end of the day. He knew he should have persisted and said that you weren't right, that he loved you so much that he could take a bullet for you, right on his chest. He'd do anything for you, but didn't seem to know how to put that in words when it comes to a fight.

"Fuck!" He shouted when alone in his office, hands collapsing on the desk. It was past seven at night and he hadn't heard from you. A whole fucking day. He asked Harrison to send the men to look for you. He wouldn't force you coming back home, but he needed to be sure you were alright.

All the bad thoughts he could have were now successfully running through his mind and driving him nuts. He thought that maybe some rival mobster could have laid eyes on you, all by yourself, and tried to do something. You could be in serious danger right now, and Tom wouldn't forgive himself if that was the case.

He took a drink. He needed to clear his mind as time was passing by and his men didn't have any information about you. Your phone would be filled with unanswered calls from him, even voicemail telling you he was sorry and would do anything if you only called him back to say you were doing fine.

"Please, love, if you're listening to it... fuck, I'm so fucking sorry. I never intended to hurt you. I'm a dumbass, and you don't have to forgive me, but, please, just let me know you're fine and I'll give you your time. Just- please. I need to hear from you, y/n", he recorded, a drink on his hand and the other holding his phone firmly.

When it was 9pm, he decided he was going out to look for you himself. He just couldn't sit there waiting for a call or for his men do to something - he needed to take that pressure of his chest and no one was helping.

He took his gun, called Harrison and a few more man before heading to the living room.

"Alright, we have a few more places left" Tom started his instructions, while shoving his gun at the back of his trousers. "Harrison and I are going to her family's house. You two check in her old friend's place. Doesn't matter how far it is, I don't want you two to come back until you've looked through that fucking town-"

"Tom", Harrison cut him off, coughing a bit to get his attention. He was about to snap at him, when he followed his gaze.

And there you were, standing at the door frame in the living room, a confused expression on your face as you tried to understand what was going on in the middle of the room. Usually, Tom never had meetings in any other area than the conference room.

"What's going on?", you asked bluntly, and Tom releases a deep and relieved breath, so audible that you couldn't not take notice of.

"God, you're here", he breathed out, walking towards you in large steps. You were still mad, but also so confused with his reaction that you couldn't stop him from holding you tightly in his arms. "Fuck, darling, where were you?".

Besides his words being a bit harsh, his voice was soft and caring, worried if anything. He didn't let go of you first, kissing the top of your head for a long minute.

Harrison smiled a little seeing the both of you and dismissed the men out of the room, leaving the two of you alone.

"Sorry, you don't need to explain", Tom shook his head and pulled away to look at you. His eyes were bloodshot and tired, a dark circle around it. He brushed your cheeks with the pad of his thumb and furrowed. "Are you okay, though?"

"Yeah, I am- but what was going on?", you insisted.

Tom cupped your face on his hands, still not believing that you were there again. "I was so fucking worried. I thought that something was off, you didn't answer any of my messages or calls... I was heading to a drive with my men to look for you".

You blink a few times, startled that Tom was so concerned all this time.

"I was in a hotel room, actually", you chew in your lower lip, kind of ashamed that you put him through such a concern. "Needed to be alone for a time, so I turned my phone off".

Tom pressed his forehead against yours. "It doesn't matter anymore, darling. It was all my fault", his voice was croaky and you felt your heart pounding inside your chest. "I should never have said those things to you-"

"It's alright, Tom-"

"No, it's not", he shook his head. "Cause it was all lies. I do fucking care if you leave me. I wouldn't stand being away from you, my love. You're everything, everything. And you're right, I don't spend much time with you, and it eats me alive, cause that's what makes me happy, being around you. All I ever wanted was to make you happy, sweetheart. I'm so fucking sorry if I haven't shown you how much you mean to me..."

"Shhh, Tom", you closed your eyes, hugging him by the neck and bringing him closer. "It's okay, I know it. I wasn't thinking straight too, I know you don't treat me like that. I was just too pissed, and yeah, I'd like to spend more time together, but it's alright that you don't-"

He cut you by a sweet kiss pressed on your lips, "Nothing is more important for me than you. I was too mad with that thing in the restaurant to say it right away, but I'll try harder. I'm gonna be here with you, no matter what. Work can wait".

You sigh and pull him closer, breathing his comforting scent.

"My lovely girl", Tom sighs and smile a bit. "You scared the hell out of me".

"You deserved it, idiot" you said and he laughed quietly.

"I love you, darling", he stroked your back, hiding his face in the crock of your neck. "Always".

"Love you too, Tommy".

You spent the rest of the night together, having a nice and cozy dinner at home. Tom never smiled wider than that night, and the following others were fulfilled with his promise - there was always time in your day to spend alone with your boyfriend.

*******

Taglist:

@dreamy-clousds

@pinkrockstar19

@onyourgoddamnleft

@spideyspeaches

@miraclesoflove

@hollands-taste

@zspideyy

[tastyykpop]

nct dating headcannons!

I only did 127 because there's so many but ill do the others if anyone requests it :)

ɴᴄᴛ ʙғ ʜᴇᴀᴅᴄᴀɴᴏɴ

Taeil

Mr. Moon Taeil is the definition of a cuddly boyfriend

Hes always holding your hand or kissing your cheek

Definitely gets shy when the members are around but in public youre all his

Hes super sincere about anything too but also knows how to joke around

I mean have you seen him with nct

Hes funny❗❗

Like he's gonna make you laugh no matter what

And those deep convos yall would have at night while cuddling>>>

"What if we were put on earth by aliens as an experiment to see if we would live and everytime we see ufos its just our cousins checking up on us"

Eyes wide open, "bro"

Taeils either the big or small spoon too

There's no in between

Also the biggest baby when yall are chilling

"I call small spoon!"

"But you were the small spoon last night"

"K and what about it"

10/10 would complain if you didn't want to sit with him and watch a movie or show

Would probably guilt trip you by saying you never watch something with him

Hes a sweet manipulator...

But he could easily replace you with one of the members

Like sicheng

Taeil will always ask if you've eaten

If you haven't eaten he gets big sad

Don't make him sad

Plus hes always checking on your health

And he'll know if your lying if you say you're doing fine when you're not

Also don't lie in general cuz he doesn't like that

That would make him trust you a bit less and he definitely wants trust in the relationship

Trust is a huge key or hes out

Johnny

This man 🥲

Boyfriend Material™

So gentle and loving

Loves making you feel special and will hype the shit out of you when you don't feel confident doing something

Will always make sure you're doing okay

Johnny puts in so much effort to make this relationship work and expects you to put the same amount of effort into it too

Like taeil, hes really big on trust

Add honesty to that list

Plus he expects you to be mature when needed

If you're the type of person who depends on someone else for everything and I'm mean everything he will actually leave

Hes not your babysitter❤

But he will take care of you to some extent

Like basic things for instance

He'll make you food if you're sick, get you water if your dehydrated, will get your feminine products when you need it

Very sweet😌

Okay and he spoils you but wbk

"Why are you getting me so much things?"

"Because I love you."

"But why did you get me a kitten costume???"

He has some kinks to work out 😐

Johnny will go to shop after shop even if you say you don't want something (you do but you just don't want him to pay) he'll get it without batting an eye

"Youve been staring at these shoes for 5 minutes imma buy them for you"

"Huh? No! I-"

"Too late"

will take you out to dinner all the time just to be romantic

Hes actually really good at romantic stuff

I say Johnny you say whipped

Johnny👀

Whipped😫

His free time is always you time

So don't bother saying your busy cuz now hes busy with you

"Johnny i got a test coming up can you come later? I need to study

"Thats cute im coming over to help"

Taeyong

Judging taeyong on his looks, some say he would be cold to his girlfriend

Like a tsundere

But the man is quite the opposite

Though he can be stern if need be

He has 22 children what do you expect

Will literally treat you like his members and always taking care of you

But there will be times when you have to take care of him because hes so tired from work

He turns into a baby when he's tired or lazy too

So wrap him in a burrito blanket and hes all set for the day

Makes weird noises but thats normal

You're just watching tv and hes just making some old video game sounds with his mouth

No one questions it

If he didnt make sounds you'd probably question it

Talks in pout if he doesn't get his way with you

"Why don't you wanna play games with me~"

"Bruh I'm tired"

Or just gives you those big puppy eyes without even trying

Complete other person when you're not listening

He just kinda stares at you all intimidating like until you listen

Taeyong won't do anything too bad if you kept ignoring him, but you don't know that

Omg bro he'd literally bring you on vlive with him to chat

Even if the company is like '???Shes not an idol???'

But its taeyong so SM doesn't care🧍‍♂️

"We have special guest again! Its y/n-ah!!"

You'd be just chilling on his bed giving him a wtf look until you realize there's a camera and smile

"Shes cute. Isn't she cute guys?"

Don't try to escape the vlive, he'll just get up and sit you on his lap

Makes everyone watching jelly🥲

Bro he would make fun of you the same way he makes fun of doyoung

you'd be sitting with doyoung or sumn and taeyong just comes up to the both of you and decides

'Its time to end these two'

You and doyoung are just like 'tf did we do'

Somehow some other members are making fun of yall

Of course they aren't mean

Its all fun and games and gives you a good laugh after

Doyoung

Hes literally a mom

But its ok

You love it

Sometimes

He also nags a lot

And if you don't listen he gets mad

You wouldn't tell him this but you find it funny

And cute🤐

"Youre almost as bad as dream" 

"what are u talking about im an angel"

"Kay then put the knife down we kinda need haechan to live"

Hes beaten you with a pillow once

In front of taeyong

Taeyong was watching like 👁👄👁

I dont think he cares much for pda tbh

But he doesn't hate it

He'll hug you a lot

And doyoung will probably kiss you here and there

But thats depending on his mood

If he's tired he'd probably just hold you in his arms

Either way he still makes you smile even with the smallest of touches

When you guys go out in public doyoung always holds your hand

I mean always

Remember when I said he doesn't seem like the type to be into pda

I lied

Doyoung wants everyone to know youre his

He won't kiss you but he will pull you into random hugs and hold your hand like he's gonna lose you any second

Doyoung also can't go anywhere without dressing his best

Like even if he's just practicing he's gotta look cute

And he always does because he's fucking kim doyoung

Doyoung also has a habit to make up names for you

Like one day he'll call you babe/baby

The next day could be angel or princess

Then there's you who just calls him bunny because he hates (loves) it

Expect some random gifts from him

Cuz like Johnny, he likes to spoil you

he just loves the smile thats plastered on your face

Pinches your cheeks evey time you smile too

When you guys are just chilling in the dorms you are always doing something to make doyoung get "angry"

"Angry" doyoung is a fun doyoung

Says you and taeyong 🤭

Literally will chase you around the dorm until he gets you and "scolds you"

Hell also scold taeyong

Sometimes you prank him with the other members

*cough*haechan*cough*

But doyoung knows youre just being playful

So he kinda laughs at you

Yuta

Hes a devil

Wbk

He can go from calling you the cutest lil thang to saying the most inappropriate stuff

"U have such a pretty mouth" 

"no stop" 

"how about u use it on my-"

"OUT DEMON"

Besides that he's actually very nice

Although he doesn't really show his affection like how most couples would

At first hes kinda like a "cold boyfriend" but not?

Gives off a tsundere kinda vibe

He lives for pda

Especially if you initiate it

His favorite is kissing your neck

Not in a sexual way or trying to give you hickeys tho

He just comes over and kisses it

Probably has a neck kink 😳

Same 😌

When you guys are out in public his arm is always around your waist or shoulders

He gets easily jealous when you give anyone any attention

Especially if you have a pet

He will be pouty for God knows how long until you notice

"I'll make it up to you"

"ok then prove it *pats his lap*"

"...I can and will replace you with this animal"

Will not let a dude flirt with you

If he sees a dude flirt with you he just gives them ㄒ卄乇 ㄥㄖㄖҜ

Lowkey hot

But sometimes gives you that look if u aren't listening to him

Its an advantage

Freaks you out tho

When your sitting on the couch minding your own damn business yuta always pulls you onto his lap or sits you between his legs

He really likes to be close to you

So when you guys are sitting he keeps his head on your shoulder and his arms wrapped around you gently rocking you both

Omg im making myself feel single

If you are sad yuta will always be the first person you lean on

Even if its not serious

"Who do I need to fuck up?"

"Im literally just on my period..."

The members sometimes tease him because they'd never seen him so in love

He looks at you like ur his everything

Because you are

He'll tell you that too

If you say something bad about urself he gives you a whole ass lecture about how u should love yourself the way he loves you

He'd be talking for 25 minutes but you stopped listening 30 minutes ago

Literally scolds you for not listening

Loves how well you get along with the members

But also hates how well you get along with specific members because of how similar you are with them

What I'm trying to say is that you are a bit too similar to mark🚶‍♂️

Jaehyun

Frat boy boyfriend

Lowkey wants to fuck everyday

Idk he gives off that vibe

But jaehyuns just chill half the time

Hes like an American boyfriend like bitch you're Korean 👁👄👁

Hes super cuddly and warm

Thats weird wait

Like when you're cold just snuggle into him because body heat <3

Always loosely has his arms around your waist when just laying down

Whole different story if you're sitting on his lap and just standing around

Back hugs😫😫

Dead ass the first thing he does if he sees you is give you a back hug

It works for a lot of things

Surprise? Back hug

You're cooking? Back hug

Horny? Back hug

Solves his life problems basically

Hes a freak omg

Very flirtatious too

Hes just that bitch

Either he makes you blush or roll your eyes

"Y/n you're ass is fat"

Def an ass guy😑

Hes the type of guy to put his hands in your jeans back pocket

Wait no im feeling jaehyun too much rn

BUT MY POINT STILL STANDS

Or when yall hug his hand doesn't rest on your back but your ass

If you're wearing some shorts or something that makes your but pop

Hes gonna smack it and pretend like nothing happened

Yo someone pls save me im in my jae feels

Nah I've been talking about his ass kink for too long

Ummmm

Okay for real though jaes actually really nice and kind of careless when it comes to you

Fuck everyone else, if you've fallen and scraped your knee hes gonna be that soccer mom and rip a band aid out of nowhere

But if one of his members scraped their knee he'd just look the other way and smile like nothing happened

Earlier I said he was chill but hes also loud too

You walk into the dorms and the first thing you hear is "Y/N!!" Wyd?

You swear he doesn't realize how loud he is half the time because of that deep voice

This bitch always makes sure youre healthy and tries to take you to the gym with him

It dont work cuz this bitch just stares at your ass

Nah I need to do the next member

Jungwoo

hes literally the cutest especially around you

When he greets you its basically a whole ass bear hug

Whole lots a kissing

Literally doesn't care where you guys are

He will kiss you anywhere

Loves to kiss your forehead because he doesn't have to bend down as much🤭

doesnt care if the members are there

Nobody ever questions it either

"youre my baby right?"

"jungwoo-"

"riGhT?"

"Yes...."

He does aegyo if he doesn't get his way

It works every time don't lie

Will probably sit on your lap for some reason

Hes not light

But if you can do it so can he

you guys never get into fights

Even if you do its never anything serious

"you fucking pushed me so u could win"

"false I accidentally bumped my arm into urs"

"whats accidental is the murder im going to commit"

"what?"

"What?"

Smh young love

Going shopping with jungwoo is like shopping with a kid

Will beg for any food he lays his eyes on

"Omg can we get cookies?🥺"

"only if your paying"

“*gently places cookie dough back* lmao cookies? Never heard of her"

No matter how tired the boy is he will always find time for you

Hell take you too your favorite restaurants and even if you insist on paying he wont let you

If you don't marry him I will

When you guys are walking in public he will always be holding your hand

Says its because he doesn't want you to get lost

But you know damn well its actually him who doesn't want to get lost😳

Jk you just know he wants to be close to you

If you make any suggestive joke he always knows how to counterpart it

Leaving you speechless like the members

When you guys are going to bed he has his arms wrapped around your waist

first thing jungwoo does before sleeping is giving you a kiss

Doesn't care if your asleep or awake

Then a quiet 𝐼 𝑙𝑜𝑣𝑒 𝑦𝑜𝑢

Mark

i dont even know how to explain this relationship bruh

like its mark lee its gonna be a weird time

ok so marks actually hella nice

kinda bro or dude zones you but you do it back

theres a bunch of yo’s too

as someone who says yo a lot im happy i can relate to him

“yo youre doing that wrong though”

“dude im literally reading the directions, it said 3 cups of water”

“bro it says 3/4 oh my god”

yall cant cook 

taeyong wont even allow even you to help him cook

anyway marks special

but seriously marks actually a very gentle person with you

like legit is super nice to you even if you sometimes piss him off

marks probablys only been mad at you once then was like ‘its okay’

go to his practices cuz he loves that shit

he really likes when you are social with the members too

cuz then you guys are all friends and he can just bring you to places with them :D

this kid will literally not to pda in front of any member so you have to basically force him to just hug you

johnnys always making fun of you two and mark panics everytime while youre just like ‘yeah what about it’

compliment mark and hes blushing and squealing like an anime girl

inch resting concept 

“mark you look cute today”

“o-oh um..yeah thanks”

and this man can take compliments but with you its a whole new story

aight lemme get serious

marks mad sensitive 

so dont actually purposely make him mad, jealous, or upset

it would crush him

and he doesnt want someone like that in a relationship

cuz if he doesnt purposely do it to you, dont do it to him

take notes 

Haechan

hes a brat bye

would actually fight you just to get his way

makes fun of you on a regular

thinks hes cute 

hes not wrong

but actually he knows how to act mature when he needs to

like if youre genuinly getting upset with him, he will straighten up and quicky apologize, even give you a phat kiss and hug

might take you to get ice cream after if he really upset you

he can be nice

nah jk hes very nice and is a really energetic boyfriend

haechan always wants to do something with you liek go to the amusement park, go out to eat, or go shopping

sometimes makes everything seem like a hassle to leave and go somewhere with you cuz hes either lazy or playing video games

“cant you just go by yourself?”

“but what if i get lost”

“the ice cream place is literally five miles away”

“actually its seven so im gonna get lost”

hed groan the whole time just to be annoying but you dont care cuz you got your ice cream

if you go to any concert or practice, haechan always has to make things more sexy than they should be

like ‘fool’ became hella sexual and for what

its probably one of his favorites to make you blush

he loves your reactions

keeps him alive

hyucks always got something to say even at the most awful times

youre literally choking on water and he goes “ill give you something to choke on later”

and you have to cancel your dying session to smack his head

my guy has no filter

and he wont even hide that around the members

theres always that smirk on his cute ass face if he succeeds too

i have the sudden urge to fight him

[ahoge-fish]

Hi!! Hope ur doing ok over there!

I know u must be very busy at the moment so pls dont feel the need to answer this, this is just something i want to say to u

I want to thank u, from the bottom of my heart for all that u do here, not only u create beautiful content but also make people smile with ur drawing that u had done for them. Thank u that even tho ur busy u try ur best to give content whenever u can and on theses tirying times ur works just brings me to smile 😊💕💕💕💕

The amount of time u put in ur stories and how well detail it explains behind the character's beliefs and understand makes them feel alive! I love it to bits!!

And ur art is just as wonderful i have no words to express its just so - well detail and alex's freckled skin its so pretty! U made me love her crack ebergy so much hdjdndjdjjdnndjd 😭💘💘💘💘💘💘

Its thanks to u that i felt inspired to create my own lil story >//W//<

Srsly thank u for existing and creating this wondeful lil world in the jjba fandom im so glad i stumbeled in ur blog 💕💕💕💕

Thank u for ur patience, hope u have a good one 🙏💕

I-

THANK YOU??? I MEAN, THANK YOU SO SO SO MUCH!!!

I am indeed very busy with school, but I can always respond to asks like this or a little chat! I just don't have time or energy to draw, but I'll be back this summer WOOOOOOO! >:D

I am really really glad that you like what I do so much to the point of inspiring you to do your own story! It's a very good feeling knowing that I am good enough to inspire people :'') 💖💖💖

And of course I'm also very glad you like my story!! It is still a work in progress, when I can I keep modifying things and it's all just messy, with posts where I tell important things or a big chunch of lore or just a tiny bit around the blog, I just have to put all of the things together in a single post and then I'll put the link in my pinned post! But I'll do that after Stone Ocean comes out, because now that there's the anime I stopped reading the manga (it's just difficult for me reading it, and I also prefer seing the characters move and hear their voices and sounds uwu. I still know how it ends so, what I need is to know what happends in the middle of it, that's also why I'm waiting for the anime XD).

STIIILL! Like I said I'm very glad you like it so far! I fatigue to express myself through words, but I do my best to make it as understandable as possible! And for that I also have to thank @helpimhyperfixating , because her writings make me understand the dynamic of writing and she also helps me! Thank you Gogo💖💖💖

And for Alex, again I am reeeeally glad that you like her! Because as I said in one of my previous posts, I basically grew up with her so she's very special to me and I'm glad that other people like her too :'') AND YEEES FREACKLES ARE AMAZING!!!

And your artstyle is also SO ADORABLEEEE!! I love the way you draw, the expressions and even you do a lot of freckles hehehe ;)) 💖💖💖

And also, thank YOU for stumbling into my blog! Your reblogs are- I LOVE THEM! The tags you put are so funny and so wholesome at the same, and I never get tired to read them!! They just express more the appreciation you have for my draws and I feel honoured ;v; 💖💖💖

THANK YOU FOR THIS AMAZING ASK!! I hope you have a nice day too! :D 💖💖💖💖💖

[starlight-writes-stuff]

Can I request how the feral boys would ask you/ what they would do for your first time sleeping over as their girlfriend? That sounds weird but I hope you know what I mean lol. I love your writing by the way!

hi friend , and thank u ! i appreciate it <3 this is a super cute idea and i had a lot of fun writing it ,,,,, im so soft for them i can't . xoxoxoxoxo , starlight

AYO LOOK AT THESE : the smallest bit of smut but overall fluff ! soft feral boys content , come get yall juice

reblogs are always appreciated !!! <3

dream

wouldn’t be planned tbh , you’d been at his place all day and you’re both too tired to drive

you’d start to call an uber and clay would turn your phone over

“you could… stay here, if you want?”

it was a no brainer

of course you’d stay with him

clay would be so excited , smiling through his sleepy haze

he’d finally get up from his computer just to shower you with kisses all over your face

he’d tackle you back onto his bed , his soft , silly kisses turning into lingering, hard kisses

all teeth and tongue and his hands all over you

he’d get one of his legs between yours, shuddering at the way you’d whine into his mouth

his hands would make their way down to your hips

he’d grind your hips down on him , your sleepiness only making you more sensitive

you bet your ass that he’d make you cum just from grinding on his thigh

he lives in a constant state of horny™ even when he’s tired

clay would be so cocky at how he’d made you finish , doing virtually nothing

but he would go so soft at the way you were exhausted after that , yawning and rubbing your eyes

‘baby’ , ‘love’ , ‘pretty girl’

so affectionate 

you could’ve fallen asleep just like that but clay makes you get up and change

“baby , you don't want to sleep in your clothes” 

“sleep in mine instead”

you would just grumble back at him until he would physically lift you out of bed

clay would help you out of your clothes 

he’d put you in his sweats and a giant dream hoodie

just incase sap walked in for some reason

doesn't want him seeing any of the goods™

he’d carry you to the bathroom and find an extra toothbrush

clay would absolutely try to talk to you while brushing his teeth and the two of you would laugh s o hard at each other trying to talk with mouths full of toothpaste

again , he would pick you up and carry you back to his bed , shutting the door behind the two of you

“don't you want to say goodnight to sap?” “no :)”

the two of you would fall onto his bed and be asleep within 10 minutes , completely tangled in each other

he talks in his sleep

but you snore

so its even

☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁

george

soft george my beloved

he’d probably plan your guys first ‘sleepover’

he would want to make it special , and definitely do something memorable

george would bring it up to you like a week before

he’d practically invite you like it was a birthday party :,)

i can't

he’d make reservations for a nice dinner before and get all dressed up

george would pick you up and hold your hand on the console

he’d open all the doors for you 

he'd pull out your c h a i r

yall would definitely be cracking jokes all throughout dinner in the middle of this fancy restaurant

george would ABSOLUTELY knock his silverware off the table at some point

you would have to fight to not spit your drink out , laughing so hard

he’d skip on desert at the restaurant and take you to dairy queen or something

it would be the two of you in your fancy attire , sitting outside some tiny ice cream parlor

looking at eachother like you were the only two people on earth

yall are in L O V E 

once you two got home george would carry your overnight bag in 

he would change immediately 

bc he h8’s fancy clothes 

but wanted to dress up for you 

after you guys changed into pajamas , you’d stay up talking for hours

he’d tell you stories of him and all the feral boys

you’d tell him stupid things you did as a kid

the two of you would want to make the most of the extended time you had together and stay up until like 2 in the morning

george’s voice would get all low and raspy from talking for so long

you’d fall asleep on the couch together when you physically couldn’t hold your eyes open anymore

george would wake up when the sun started shining through the blinds

he would carry you up to his bed 

then promptly fall back asleep with you in his arms

☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁

sapnap 

snapmap my love .

this man doesn’t plan shi t

it would be very spur of the moment , the two of you laughing at some joke that he made when he’d grab your hand suddenly v serious

“will you sleep with me tonight?”

he’d look so earnest while asking that and you would BURST into laughter

it would take nick a hot sec to realise what he’d said and once he did . he would simply . disintegrate .

he would be so dramatic about it too

“i was trying to be romantic ! stop laughing at me !”

and you would just sit there , laughing so hard that you couldn’t produce noise anymore , just silent wheezes

you would start to cry and nick would pOUT

you would just nod , literally unable to produce words

but sap would brighten up at that

“so you’ll stay the night?”

once you got control of yourself , the two of you continued on doing what you were doing

it was like a normal day other than the fact that it ,,,, wouldn’t end

you two watched movies and played minecraft all day , being lazy together

you’d doordash dinner or order pizza or something so you didn’t have to leave the house

he’d have to stream and you would just chill , eating pizza in bed

once it became apparent that the stream was gonna last longer than planned , you would quietly come up behind him and drop a kiss on his cheek

he’d grin at you but be confused ???

you’d text him so your voice wouldn’t pop up on stream

‘gonna take a shower / keep myself busy’

he’d text back a single ‘👍🏼’

sapnap texts like a dad and NO ONE can tell me otherwise

you’d shower and get dressed , then wander down to the kitchen trying to find something to do

scavenger hunt™ for cookie ingredients

you’d bake his favorite and surprise him with a warm cookie im s o f t

the SMILE that would cross his face my god

he would feel so loved

he’d mute stream to thank you, putting his hands around your waist and burying his face into your stomach

you k n o w he’d find some way to end stream early after that , wanting to be with you

the two of you would finish off all the cookies , watching scary movies together

he’d hold you when you jump at all the spooky shit

you’d do the same for him bc sap is baby

chat . i'm kinda scared . lowkey .

you were both half asleep by the time you made your way back up to his room

you’d be lights out the minute your head hit the pillows 

and he’d be big spoon

☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁

karl

karl would probably ask you that day , texting you before you’d even come over to ask if you would stay the night

you two had technically slept over before , but never at karl’s place (usually pulling all nighters with the feral boys on stream or with the beast crew)

you can not tell me . that karl . would not build a fort . with you .

and he would 100% go all out with it

he’d get lights to string up on the inside (the twinkle ones for sure)

he would get a fuckton of pillows and the softest blankets he can find and pile them in

karl would essentially make a nest for the two of you

you’d spend the first hour alone sharing soft kisses and cuddling so close that you weren't sure where you ended and karl began

he’d hold you , letting you lay on his chest and listen to his heartbeat

you’d talk about everything and nothing at all , just wanting to hear each other’s voices

until someone’s stomach growled

he’d laugh until he couldn't breathe 

you had tears rolling down your face , your stomach hurting from the giggles 

he’d either take you to get food before or doordash your favorite

because neither of you can cook blESS

you’d pick out cute , matching pajamas for your first official night together

but

he’d end up giving you his clothes to sleep in 

because he likes you wearing his stuff 

and it's more comfortable than your fancy pajamas

he’d cover his eyes and face a blanket/wall while you were changing

the only time either of you would leave the fort would be for more snacks or to go to the bathroom

karl would bring his laptop in and turn in a movie as you two were settling in for the night 

(some super dumb kids movie) 

(my brain immediately went to the lorax) 

(i’ll see myself out)

and he’d stay awake until you fell asleep, your face buried into his t-shirt

it made his heart so full that you felt safe enough to fall asleep with him

he’d play with your hair and trace over your features as soft as possible

because you're just so beautiful when you’re asleep ??

karl murmurs how much he loves you , everything that he loves about you while he knows you can't hear it

he’d drift off with you still in his arms, his lips pressed to the top of your head in a sweet, gentle kiss

and the two of you would stay like that the entire night , keeping each other warm

im so soft for him

can u tell

karl jacobs my love

☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁

quackity

listen

everyone writes big q as a stupid dumb dummy

and while he can be that at some times

this man would be so fucking thoughtful ??? when it came to his girl ?????

you literally can't tell me otherwise .

much like gogy he would plan something special

but like

he can COOK yall

he’d make you a nice ass dinner

and set up a picnic in the backyard 

he’d light candles and make it all fancy

literally it would be a scene out of a movie

once you finished eating dinner the two of you would watch the sunset

he’d play guitar and sING FOR YOU

you’d stay outside soaking in the heat even after the sun had gone down

stargazing for as long as you could

alex would put his arm around you and have you lay on his chest

you’d listen to his heartbeat while you pointed out the big dipper

he’d make up his own constellations aljidhkuvgfhadj

you two would only go inside because you were being eaten alive by mosquitos

one of you would play music off your phone and yall would slow dance in the kitchen

he would repeatedly tell you how much he loved you , pressing tender kisses to your neck , your jaw

until a fucking ad would play

and alex would just lose his shit

he would laugh so hard he’d ipad kid cough

then you would simply ascend

the two of you would be laying on the kitchen floor absolutely D Y I N G of laughter

you’d stay there for a while , trying to recover

by the time you did , your ribs were sore from all the giggles

alex would pick you up and throw you over his shoulder , walking you up to bed

he’d suplex you onto the mattress

the two of you are children around each other tbh

that would lead to a wrestling match

until you’d found your way onto his lap , pinning him by his wrists

w h e w

the way that man would kiss you after that ? bye im gone

lets just say by the time he was finished you would both be exhausted

he’d tell you how pretty you were , how good you did

the two of you would fall asleep with tangled limbs , half kissing