#'the events have already came and went; what we must do next is survive' kinda vibes

[alto-tenure]

why does uchikoshi write one game with an extremely personal and for lack of a better word intimate conflict and then immediately after the sequel's conflict is "let's stop the apocalypse!"

[creepling]

am i not enough? (quackity x reader) - apocalypse!AU

( 。・_・。)人(。・_・。 ) | part of the @quackisinnit 1k event !

THE PROMPT IS . . . “ AM I NOT ENOUGH ? “

pairing: irl!quackity x genderneutral!reader (apocalypse!AU)

word count: 3,306

summary: the reader and alex become a duo while coming across each others paths during a zombie apocalypse. tensions rise as they set up camp in a warehouse, where alex begins to confess how he feels towards the reader. (angst into fluff <33)

tw: zombie apocalypse, blood (ment), cursing, guns, death, eating.

It had been three months since the fallen of mundane life. Three months of complete abnormality, everything known to be in existence that was worth caring about; completely gone. jobs, currency, education were becoming a historic relic. The world was put back to zero. Instead of cavemen and dinosaurs, the new species of flesh-eating corpse’s roamed in packs and seeked for fresh meat. They may have been slow, but they travelled in numbers and they could smell you from a mile away. I learned that your scent became less of a problem when you didn’t keep hygenic. My stence blended with the earth and blood and the roamers didn’t catch us out as much; so we used that to our advantage.

I only had one companion, his name was Alex. He was absolutely dumbfounded when I discovered him. I raided his abandoned home looking for supplies, and when I had to kill a roamer that vacaded in his bedroom; I found him curled up in a ball under his bed. He told me that he had been hiding the whole month when he realised help was to never come; so his only plan was to hide out until he ran out of supplies. That became a problem when I attempted to take them. We made the mutual agreement that if I was to take the supplies, he would come with me. I refused to stay and hide; that is how you get yourself killed. Thankfully he agreed to come with me, and we have been inseperable ever since. However, our bond is nothing close to a friendship, we just had to stick together to survive.

Alex’s main idea was to find a group, hoping by now someone had turned one of the surbubans into a mini civilization. We had travelled between three cities however and we found no sign of good company. As a duo, we have only killed one human within these three months. A man who tried to kill us at gunpoint in hopes of taking our things, to which we scarsely saved our lives by ducking behind a bar table. With one aimless shoot, I shot my gun and it pierced through the man’s chest. I saved our lives, but the sight of the man’s lifeless eyes still haunts me in my sleep. 

One night, Alex found a two-store warehouse to shelter in while on a supply run. He suggested we camp on the second floor and catch up on our sleep and starvation, since we eventually got ahold of sleeping bags and tinned food. I agreed, but reminded him the stay can’t be perminant. He agreed also, still fixated on the idea of finding a commune.

While I made a fire and cooked food, I obvserved Alex drawing in a notepad. I failed to make out what he was doing so I asked, “What are you drawing?”

“I’m trying to draw a map.” He said to me, “It’s not accurate, but it will give us a rough idea of the roads until we find a map.”

“I didn’t take you as a smart person.” I said, hoping he didn’t think I meant it seriously. It was rare for me to joke in times like these, but when I did, my humour came off dry. Thankfully, my comment made Alex scoff out a chuckle.

“And I didn’t take you for a fighter.” Alex said. Since being with each other for two months, we both naturally adopted different roles that benefitted us. Alex was the navigator, the finder; he seemed to have a good sense of direction and I relied on him to not get lost. He also had a good eye and was always good at finding things such as second-way exits or food hiding in obscure places. For me, my job was a lot more physical. I was a good shoot, I knew how to make a fireplace, or bandage a wound. When things got dirty, I would get lucky and save our asses.

“Your food’s ready.” I said, handing him his warm can of chicken soup and a packet of chips. He thanked me, putting his notebook down and sitting cross-legged beside me. As we ate we sat in silence, the only sounds in the warehouse being our mouths chewing the food. We hadn’t ate in nearly a week. I tried my best to chew my chips before swallowing so I didn’t end up with stomache pain, but the instant flavour shot through my tongue and I instinctly ate them quickly. Alex finished his food within minutes, licking the chip packet and his fingers; scraping every last bit of soup from the can and into his mouth. I reluctantly did the same, feeling a little embarrassed; I have never felt so starved in my life. 

“That was fucking amazing.” Alex sighed out, now heating his hands over the fire. I nodded in agreement, collecting the empty tin cans and keeping them next to our things. They will be handy for traps, tying them with strings and hanging them in the woods while hunting would let us know of intruders. It was the small things like that that has made us survive this long.

“Are you gonna go to sleep now? I could keep watch.” I offered, observing Alex’s bloodshot eyes. If we had mirrors, we would flinch at our reflections. Alex looked rough. He always wore his beanie, which he apparently did even before things got bad. He always had a collective spot of dirt on his nose and cheekbones no matter how clean we were, it’s where it always collected the most. His hands were the most dirty, dirt under his short nails and inbetween his fingers. From the rare occasions we touched hands, I felt the softness of his hands, compared to mine that felt aged and rough. His knuckles were stained with blood. Out of both of us, I was covered in the most blood. When I looked down, my hands had a reddish tint, observing more I could see small cuts on my hands from being idle with my knife when striking roamer’s heads. Without having to see, I knew I had sprays of blood on my face from the amount of times I killed roamers. To think when life was normal we cared so much about our appearence, but now activities like doing makeup, brushing your hair, brushing your teeth seemed so pointless. We were slowly becoming used to primitive life and deep down that scared me. I think it scared Alex too.

“I’m tired as fuck, but I know I won’t sleep.” Alex said in a low tone, looking at his hands full of shame. I nodded my head in understanding, knowing exactly how he was feeling. We hadn’t slept properly in months, instead when one person kept watch, the other just lay down with their eyes closed. We forgot what it was like to dream, or to feel hazy. We were constantly alert.

“Since we have no intention of sleeping. Why don’t we play a game?” Alex said. I cocked my eyebrow up in question. What game could we play that didn’t involve making noise and attracting attention?

“We ask each other 20 questions. Normally if you don’t want to answer a question- you would have to do a dare. But hey, wants the point in hiding nowadays?” Alex said, looking at me contently.

“We should be hiding ourselves more than ever, I think.” I said, adding fuel to the fire to keep it burning. “That way no one knows our weaknesses.”

“So you don’t trust me?” Alex said. His question threw me off. It’s not that I didn’t trust him, but maybe I was unwilling to get to know him. I had already lost the people close to me, and I was still in grieving. I was too afraid to get close with Alex. I always had the thought in the back of my head that one day, I might end up losing him. His intelligence may only get him so far.

“I understand.” Alex said, taking back his question. Seeing the hurt in my eyes, he must have realized what I was thinking. He lost his close ones too. We both lost so much, we had a mutual understanding about that. Yet, I looked at Alex, and he still felt like a mystery to me. He always pulled out jokes, even in times like these. However, in moments when he thought I wasn’t looking, I could see the pain concealed in his face. Sometimes I even heard him cry at night when he thought I was sleeping. Maybe it was about time we opened up to each other, instead of feeling like we need to suffer alone. We could be there for each other not just physically, but emotionally.

“Okay then, since it was your idea, you ask the first question.” I said, hugging my legs to my chest. Alex smiled a little at me, going into thought as he tried to think of a question.

“So, what did you do when life was normal?” He asked first.

I let out a sigh then replied, “I had a very normal life. Lived with my family, did average in school, worked a job to get money. I actually had plans of moving out to the city, I always wanted to go to LA. I never really had aspirations, just wanted to be content.” It sounded boring, but I was happy with my life. I had my ups and downs like everyone else. “What were you like?”

Alex smirked and looked away from me, seeming to become bashful. “I was a twitch streamer.” He said. “And had a Youtube channel. God- it sounds so stupid now that I say it. Like it was all pointless-”

“Were you like- famous?” I asked, trying to conceal a smile.

“Um- I guess you could say that. I had millions of followers.” Alex shook his head, “But I also went to college. I was studying law. I was always staying up late, barely sleeping; both studying and streaming all the time. It took up my whole life, that I just kinda forgot about everything else.”

“Well, you were obviously not famous, because I didn’t know who you were.” I jokingly said, nudging his side. That seemed to make him smile and feel less embarassed.

“So how the hell did you learn how to shoot if you lived such a normal life?” He asked.

“I just learned while doing it. My dad kept a gun.” I admitted, looking at the very same gun I had in the holster wrapped around my thigh. “He would teach me now and then how to use it, but I was never a shooter. The more roamers I shot, the more I got used to it.” Thinking about someone close to me made me chew the inside of my cheek anxiously.

To deflate my melancholy, I asked the next question. “Did you always wear that stupid hat?”

Alex chuckled and rubbed the top of his hat. “Yeah, twenty-four seven. I don’t why, I just find it comfortable. My “fans” would joke that I was bald because I never showed my hair.” He said, “God- saying the word fans sounds fucked up . . .”

“Maybe you’ll bump into one of them.” I said, “Heck- maybe there’s a commune right now dedicated to you, trying to find you and keep you safe.”

Alex laughed again, covering his face with his hands. I laughed alongside him, the first time I genuinely laughed in a good few weeks. Looking at Alex, seeing how I uplifted him, it struck a chord with me. As much as I didn’t like to show it, but he made affects on me that were indescribable. He made me feel just a little more contempt, without him I would probably not be able to cope for this long. We eventually locked eyes with each other, Alex’s gaze being longer than I expected. If it wasn’t for the blood, my face would have exposed the blush forming on my cheeks.

“Have you ever fell in love, (Y/N)?” Alex then asked me, which set me aback. The question was out the blew and I think Alex realised that as he looked away shyly, his gaze fixated on the flames of the fire to avoid my gaze. I still stared at him, almost in amazment, trying to conjuct a reasonable answer.

“I don’t know.” I answered. “I have loved people, yes, but- I don’t think I have been in love. You’re suppose to know when things like that happen, right?”

Alex didn’t answer me, he kept staring at the fire. I found myself admiring his side profile, watching how he slowly bit his lip; concealed in thought. I noticed how the glow of the flames contrasted with the darkness of his eyes, how the light outlined his complexion. When I realized I was staring for too long, I looked away, instead my eyes looked out the warehouse window, my eyes tracing the stars in the night sky. 

“I feel like I have known you forever.” Alex admitted all at once. “It’s only been two months, but I have gotten close to you more than anyone I have in my whole life. It might sound crazy but- I believe we were suppose to come together that day.”

My gaze turned back to Alex when I felt his eyes lay upon me. His stare was soft, something I only seen in passing times. I was able to admire him for the first time since we met. In this moment, in the dead of night, away from danger and suspicion; I could look at him with full sentiment. I didn’t need to admire him when he was less suspecting it, afraid of receiving decline or making things awkward. In this moment I realized, I may have developed feelings more than companionship towards him. That excited me. But also terrified me.

“I feel that way with you, Alex.” I admitted, “But . . .”

I decided to choose my words carefully. This conversation was heading in a direction that made me nervous. The world is falling apart around us, and I couldn’t help but question our motives. We should be focusing on survival, not developing a relationship that could be destroyed at any second. Once we step out this warehouse, our chances of losing our lives become high. I wasn’t prepared to damage my mental state, it was already bad enough. I realized my long pause was making Alex shift nervously, so I looked at him in hopes my words would slip from my mouth.

I caved in, muttering lowly, “We should get some rest.” I got up on my feet and was ready to grab my sleeping bag and make up a place to rest, until I heard Alex get his his feet and say words that made my heart sink.

“Am I not enough?”

When I turned to look at him, the hurt was glistening in his eyes. He gulped dryly and he fumbled with his fingers. My eyes shifted from side to side as I was stuck with my words. I kept stammering, and I rubbed my face in stress, ready to plead my case. Until Alex jumped in.

“Don’t think I’m only saying these things to you because there is no one else, (Y/N). I have been thinking about this for a while, everytime I am left with my thoughts. I am certain I will still have the same feelings if we met when things didn’t go to shit. I don’t just think this because we have been the only people for each other. I really really like you, (Y/N). And because of the way the world is, I never want to lose you. I never want you to feel alone ever again. I not only want to protect you because we’re a team, I want to protect you because the thought of losing you pains me so much.”

For a split second I thought Alex was about to burst into tears. That was when I did something I thought I would never do again, which was pull him into my embrace. I hugged Alex so tight that I heard him gasp, freeze, until he eventually wrapped his arms around me and held me just as tight. My face buried into the crook of his neck, feeling the warmth of his body, his soft hands caressing my back and brushing his thumb down my spine in a soothing manner.

“You are enough, Alex.” I said, my words muffled by his body. I reached my lips to his ear so he could hear my words clearly. “I just didn’t want you to feel like you had to like me, or be forced to like me just because we were brought together. I was afraid you thought you were stuck with me.”

I anticipated the day that once we meet other life, Alex would slowly fade away and forget who I was. Once he meets other people, we would go our seperate ways. I never knew why the hypothetical idea pained me so much, until now. As Alex pulled away from my embrace, looking me in the eyes in a loving manner that was foreign to me, his hands on my shoulders, I realized why that idea made my heart feel heavy. I never want him to leave me, I want him to always be by my side. Alex’s gaze was enough proof that he wanted the same.

Stimulated by his touch, I was taken aback when I felt his hand cup my cheek. The warmth of his breath breezing against my cheek, I inhaled as if oxygene was nonexistent. I never realized the proximity between us was slowly closing in and when I did my eyes fluttered shut. Alex hesitated for a split second before pressing his soft lips against my own. My neck bent slightly backwards and I shifted my head to the side to deepen into our kiss, my blood-stained hands grabbing the edges of his open jacket and holding him dearly close. The heat of the kiss intermingled with the heat from the fire, my cheeks and ears grew hot. Alex’s hands were surprisingly warm as he reached his hands under my shirt, pressing his fingers and palms on the middle of my back before running his touch down my spine. My breath became shaky and I felt my legs grow heavy under me, my hands cupped the back of his neck to keep myself uplifted, and luckily Alex’s arms held my weight and pressed my body against his. It felt like hours had went by between our lips moving in sync, our tongues grazing our bottom lip’s, our hands moving and resting on different parts of our bodies. His touch felt contagious, his kisses ranging between soft and passionate. I didn’t want to stop, I never wanted to let go. Between kisses I would mutter you are enough, you are enough which made Alex smile against my lips.

That night, everything we had to worry about became last priority. The focus all throughout was each other, making up for the days where affection couldn’t be shown. In the dead of night, there wasn’t a roamer in sight. Instead of hearing narls and groans or screams of pain, there was only the faint sounds of nature. The full moon glistened, as if to be a prediction for the emotions spilling between us. I promised myself from this moment on, as I admired Alex, I would protect him no matter what. I will make sure he always feels safe as long as he is beside me. He will always be enough, if not more.

TAGLIST: @momo-has-a-gun @diggorysmalfoy @quack42069​ (join my taglist)

[crispychrissy]

Connected - Part 5

Summary: Y/N comes to and is met with a familiar face, and new things are found out about her past. Pairing: Eventual Bucky Barnes x Reader Word Count: 3632 Warnings: Angst, medical stuff, sassy reader, fluff, A/N: School is in full swing for me so my frequency of posting is going to slow down, but it won't stop completely, I promise. I already have the next chapter laid out and will start writing it as soon as I get some spare time. :) You can also follow this story & others on my Ao3 as well. The series was beta’d by the lovely @idjitmonkey and I hope you enjoy! Please send me an ask if you would like to be tagged in the series. :)

Series Masterlist – Marvel Masterlist

☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°☆

The surface under your back felt nothing like the thin stained mattress you’d been sleeping on for weeks, and the light coming from the room beyond your closed eyes was way too bright to be the solitary light bulb hanging in the middle of your cell. Cautiously, you took stock of your body and wiggled your toes, fingers, and slightly shifted your arms and legs. There was a blanket over your body, one you’d never been granted during your captivity, and you immediately opened your eyes.

Which was something you immediately regretted. The bright fluorescent lights stung your eyes, making them water before you closed them again. A soft groan escaped your lips, and shuffling next to you made you freeze.

“Y/N?”

The voice was male, and vaguely familiar somehow? Slowly you blinked your eyes open, glaring at the bright light directly above your bed, before turning your head to the left where the voice came from. You were obviously in a hospital room, but the most shocking part of your change of scenery was the presence of Steve Rogers sitting in a plastic chair next to your bed, a kind smile on his lips.

“Can you understand me?” he asked, eyes studying your face.

“Yeah,” you rasped, coughing at the dryness in your throat you hadn’t registered until now.

Steve reached forward and grabbed a cup of water with a straw in it off a rolling table near the end of your bed and brought it to your lips as you managed to sit up. “Slow sips.”

“Yeah, thanks, mom,” you sassed before taking a sip of water. It took a second for what you had said to register, and your eyes widened before you sheepishly looked up at him while taking another drink and swallowing. “Sorry.”

“S’okay, I can handle some sass,” Steve said with a soft laugh. “Do you need more water?”

You shook your head and he placed the cup on the nightstand next to you, within your reach. “What happened? Did the Army send the Avengers to get me out of there?”

Steve frowned, but quickly schooled his expression with a soft shake of his head. “Not quite. What do you remember?”

When you reached for your memories, you hissed and squeezed your eyes closed, reaching up to clutch your head. “I can’t…” All of your memories were jumbled and seemed to be playing all at once, like hundreds of people trying to tell you a story at the same time. The only thing you did notice was a quiet area of stillness off to one side of your mind, the pain pushing you away each time you tried to focus on it. It was unsettling, and you turned to look at the man sitting next to you. “Captain Rogers… what happened? Where am I?”

“You’re in an Army base in Syria, you’re safe here. And please, call me Steve,” he told you with a smile before straightening in his chair. “I know your thoughts may be scattered, but what’s the last thing you remember?”

The throbbing in your head wasn’t as intense the second time around, and you managed to lock onto a memory of walking through a city surrounded by sand, a camera in your hands. It gave you a starting point, and you slowly followed the thread connecting that moment to the next. Steve was patient while you sorted through what you remembered, each knot of events in the thread becoming more difficult to untangle and get past. Almost ten minutes later, you looked up at him, tears blurring your vision.

“I remember taking pictures,” you said quietly, “but then I was… taken. These men thought I was with the Army trying to spy on them, tried to ransom me back. I told them I wasn’t… but they didn’t listen.” You swiped at your cheeks with the back of your hand, brushing the tears away. “They hurt me,” you looked down at the bandages on your arms, “and I kept… saying… something they didn’t like?”

“You did,” Steve confirmed, plucking a tissue from the box on the rolling table and passing it to you. “Do you remember what you said?”

Untangling the knot in this part of the thread took a few moments, and you were getting closer to that dark area, but the words rang loudly in your head and sent ice through your veins. “Oh my god, I said… Cap—er, Steve, I’m so sorry. Is that why you’re here? I don’t know him, I just… they wanted a soldier, so I kept saying the name of the strongest one I could think of.” Your eyes widened and you tried to backtrack. “I mean, I’m not saying you’re not strong or anything, but I was kinda delirious and I memorized his information back when I was in school and it was—”

“It’s okay, Y/N,” Steve interrupted you softly, trying to stifle his smile. “I didn’t take it personally. The Army didn’t find a connection between you and Bucky, and we figured you kept saying his name, rank, and service number like soldiers are trained to do when they’re under duress so you could get through the worst of it.”

You snorted. “After they started really torturing me, yeah, I said it because of that. At first, it was just out of snark to piss them off. They wanted a soldier, so I gave them one of the best I know.”

Steve laughed, shaking his head. “And I think Bucky will be kinda proud of that.” The color must have drained from your face, and Steve was instantly alert. “What? What’s wrong?”

“Is he here?” you blurted out, unsure if you were ready to know the answer, let alone what answer you’d prefer.

“He is,” Steve said, still alert but more waiting for your reaction rather than responding to your distress.

“Oh,” you whispered, picking at the fabric of the blanket on your lap. “Is… is he mad?”

Steve frowned, his eyebrows pinching together. You knew there had to be more of the story based on his expression, but you weren’t sure if you wanted to know what else happened. “Why would he be mad?”

“I used his information, his name… he was kidnapped, tortured, and brainwashed by Hydra for decades.” You scoffed, shaking your head. “I’m just a photographer that was at the wrong place at the wrong time and got taken for a few weeks. Not even close to what he went through.”

“Y/N,” Steve said softly, reaching out to gently place his hand over yours, stopping your fidgeting and making you look up at him, “Bucky’s glad he gave you strength when you were in need. There’s just… other things that happened.”

Dread settled over your mind like a frozen blanket. “What? What did I do?”

“Don’t jump ahead of yourself, just think back. What’s the last thing you remember?” Steve asked.

The further you tried to progress on the thread of memories, the closer you got to the dark area, and the harder the knots in the thread became to untangle. The memories were mostly of violence, knives and fists marring your skin narrated by whispered words of Sergeant Barnes’ name. The last knot in the thread before the dark area was an odd memory, and it filled you with a kind of unsettling warmth you’d never experienced before.

“I remember one of the men, he was... digging a knife into my leg, I remember it hurt so bad, felt like it was on fire. He was saying stuff to me, like how he wanted to,” you cleared your throat, “keep me as a pet soldier, like how Hydra had one. I don’t… my whole body felt like I had been electrocuted, everything was tingling and there was this flash of images in my head. Then I felt warm all over, and the last thing I remember before everything went black was grabbing the hilt of the knife where it was sticking out of my leg.” Your eyes widened in horror and you stared at Steve, tears blurring your vision. “What did I do? Please, I need to know.”

Steve scrubbed a hand down his face and sat back in his chair. “I’m not going to lie to you, Y/N. We, or at least some of the smartest people I know, think you may have somehow connected to Bucky… psychically. The trauma of being tortured and held prisoner might have activated a dormant mutant or enhanced ability.”

“What?” you whispered. “I’m… what?” The sheer thought of you having some kind of powers like that was ridiculous, and you had to force yourself to not laugh. “That makes no sense.”

“It took us a bit to figure out, but Dr. Austin thinks that because you were in a desperate situation, your abilities manifested to save your life, and allowed your mind to link to someone you’d been thinking about, regardless of distance.” Steve took a deep breath and exhaled slowly out of his nose. “A lot of the science and technical side of it is way beyond my range of understanding, but basically she thinks that since your power was new and born out of a survival instinct, it didn’t know when or even how to break the link between you and him. Bucky’s consciousness and memories, whether it was due to his own enhanced abilities or his previous trauma being so intense, began to take over your mind.”

“So… Sergeant Barnes… possessed me?” you asked. The explanation sounded plausible, however improbable, but seeing as how there were now space aliens and wizards on Earth, nothing really sounded impossible nowadays. “Is that why I have no memory until I woke up a few minutes ago? How long was I… how long did he have control over me?”

Steve raised his hands to calm you, obviously sensing or maybe even hearing your heartbeat begin to gallop wildly in your chest. “Bucky wasn’t controlling you, Y/N. He didn’t ‘possess you’,” Steve made air quotes with his fingers, “in the way you’re thinking. Your mind was suppressed and his mind was feeding you his memories only. You were experiencing them as if you were Bucky. He wasn’t controlling what you were doing; the similar reactions you had to things he’d experienced were due to those memories and the PTSD that came from them.”

You blinked a few times, your mouth slightly open. Theoretically it made sense, but it felt like Steve was describing some kind of science fiction movie to you, not explaining something that had happened to you. “I’m so confused.”

Steve chuckled. “Yeah, I was too. It’s a lot to take in. To simplify it and use Bucky’s words, you were essentially trapped in some kind of virtual reality in your mind, living out his past memories, and you couldn’t take off the headset. You have no memory of what occurred after you linked with Bucky because his memories were providing the knowledge you needed… your brain didn’t make its own.”

Even though Steve was doing a good job explaining things, you knew there had to be something he wasn’t telling you; you could always tell when people were dancing around a truth they were avoiding. You looked down at your lap and began to rub the blanket between your fingers again, ignoring how the fabric had begun to pill due to the friction. “Did I kill someone?”

Steve was silent for a few seconds before he heaved a heavy sigh. “Yes. The four men that were holding you captive. Based on how they were killed, we think you used information from Bucky’s memories and training to kill them.”

“I didn’t hurt anyone else, did I?” you asked quietly. While the idea of killing anyone made your stomach clench and sent bile rising in the back of your throat, your captors were far from innocent, and if it made you a bad person to not feel too much sympathy for those men, then so be it.

“No, not that we know of,” Steve said. “According to the Army rescue team that was sent to investigate the store—good thinking with the Morse code, by the way—they found you sitting calmly in the corner of the room you must have been kept in. Bucky seems to think that, if you were going off of his memories and instincts while he was the Winter Soldier, you were likely waiting for a Hydra extraction team. It’s what he would have done after the, uhhh, the targets were eliminated. Lieutenant Weasley, the leader of that Army rescue squad, said the moment he told you the mission was over, you dropped unconscious, just like how Bucky was conditioned to do as well.”

As Steve was talking, you were trying to reach into your mind, trying to pull anything from the dark spaces in your memories. Each time you tried, you were only met with a black canvas where memories should have been, throbbing in your head, and silence… no fragments or flashes of any kind of recollection of the events Steve was explaining. Ignoring the increasing pain behind your eyes, you tried to reach back further, and an odd flash of a memory you didn’t recognize assaulted your mind’s eye.

“Did you...” You stopped abruptly, eyebrows furrowing as you tried to make sense of what you just saw. “Did you used to feed stray cats on the fire escape of an apartment? One of the cats… an orange named Rusty? Named him after—”

“One of the guys that worked with Bucky down at the docks,” Steve finished for you, his voice light with disbelief. “How did you know that?”

You lifted your head and locked watery eyes on Steve. “I… don’t know.” You winced, grabbing your head, the throbbing and sharp pain starting to compound and intensify. “Ah, I can’t—”

“It’s okay,” Steve soothed as he stood up, helping you lie back down before pulling the blanket up to your chest, almost tucking you in. “Get some rest. Don’t hurt yourself trying to remember things, you’ll get there.”

The urge to fight being babied welled up in your body, but the mental strain and resulting exhaustion had finally caught up with you. You made a weak unhappy noise of protest, which Steve chuckled at, before you allowed yourself to drift off into a much more peaceful darkness than the one plaguing your memories.

***

Steve rejoined Bucky, Tony, and Dr. Austin in one of the conference rooms down the hallway from the doctor’s office, and rehashed what little information he’d gathered from his conversation with Y/N. The confusion and gaps in memories they expected, but when Steve mentioned her comment about the stray cat he used to feed, Bucky’s eyes went wide.

“That’s impossible,” Bucky breathed out, shaking his head and trying not to squeeze the life out of the leather chair he had his hands braced against. “That was back in… what, ‘38? A few years after your mom died? You and I were the only people living in that place, Steve. Even my ma didn’t know about those cats.”

“Well, Y/N was able to recall your memories and training in order to kill her captors, it makes sense that she might have seen or absorbed other memories at the same time without knowing.” Dr. Austin leaned her elbow against the conference table and rubbed her forehead. “The mental strain of Sergeant Barnes’ memories on top of these abilities being new to her… she might not know how to separate things, or her memories are jumbled with yours.”

“You said the link was broken, right, doc?” Tony asked, tapping away on one of his Stark tablets, murmuring things to FRIDAY once in a while under his breath. “Buckinator over here isn’t feeding our Sarah Connor any more memories?”

Bucky scowled and he winced when he heard the leather of the chair begin to rip under his metal fingertips. “I wasn’t sent to kill her, asshole,” he grumbled.

Tony looked at Bucky over the top of his tablet and blinked in disbelief. “Barnes got a pop culture reference. Did you all hear that? FRIDAY, make a note in my calendar. I think we need to petition Ellis for a new national holiday.”

“Tony,” Steve sighed, ignoring the subsequent rambling about press releases coming from Tony in favor of looking over at the doctor. “Dr. Austin, they aren’t linked anymore, right?”

“No, I confirmed with brain scans on both Y/N and Sergeant Barnes. Their level of brain activity is back to baseline, or at least, whatever baseline should be for a super soldier and a new psychic.” Dr. Austin pursed her lips and narrowed her eyes, staring off in the distance.

Steve had seen this look before in both Tony and Bruce when they were trying to figure out something in their head, or trying to piece together clues, and knew it could last for a while. “Doctor?” Steve prodded her gently.

“Oh,” Dr. Austin said, starting slightly, giving Steve an embarrassed smile. “Sorry, I was just thinking… I have an acquaintance I may be able to reach out to. Psychic abilities and how to control them are quite out of my wheelhouse, medical studies can only get us so far. I worked with this professor and his team a few times in the past on classified projects when I was freelancing, and he might be able to offer some advice.”

“Anything that could help,” Steve said with a nod, his eyes tracking Dr. Austin as she excused herself from the room, her cell phone already in her hand. Steve looked over at Bucky, seeing the same defeated expression he’d worn on his face for months after he’d broken free of Hydra. “Buck, you gotta quit blaming yourself.”

“Why do people think doing or not doing something in their head is as easy as flipping a damn switch?” Bucky growled angrily, making Steve’s head jerk back at the sudden aggression. Bucky’s face relaxed and he grunted softly, dropping into the chair he was just squeezing. “Sorry.”

“S’okay, I get it,” Steve murmured, “it’s been a long day. How are you feeling anyways?”

“Physically? Fine. The hunger’s gone and I’m not exhausted anymore. Mentally?” Bucky snorted, ducking his chin. “How would you feel if someone accidentally linked minds with you and your brain made them relive you going into the ice over and over again? Or made them relive you getting sick a bunch when you were a kid?”

Steve sat down in the seat next to Bucky and sighed. “I would hate it, but it was an accident, Buck. Nothing you could have done to prevent it.”

“Doesn’t make him any less stupid for running into Y/N’s room alone like that,” Tony said, suddenly standing behind the two men. “You’re lucky I had my suit’s gauntlet wristwatch on me and pulled you back. Touching her could have killed you. Killed you both.”

Bucky knew it was a longshot, and the helplessness he felt knowing Y/N was stuck inside his memories spurred him into action. After being Hydra’s pawn for decades, he made a vow to never feel that helpless again if he could. “Yeah, well, it didn’t. I thought that if she was reliving my memories, then seeing me could snap her out of it. Like… waking her up from a nightmare.”

“Like a glitch in the Matrix. Smart,” Tony said the word like it physically pained him, “I guess.”

“Whether we agree about Bucky’s methods or not, it worked. The Army is going to want to debrief Y/N when she wakes up, but based on what I’ve gathered, she doesn’t have any memories of actually killing her captors. Her recollection ends moments after one of the guys stabbed her in the leg with a knife.”

“Probably the same guy who got the bladed uppercut that was found in the room she was being held in,” Bucky mused, recalling the photos in the file they were given. “Good riddance. Who knows what they would have done to her if she hadn’t killed them.”

The three men sat in silence for several long moments, each going over varying degrees of horrible scenarios which could have played out instead. Dr. Austin’s voice drifted in from the hallway, steadily getting louder as she approached the conference room again, drawing each of their attentions to the doorway.

“... thank you again, Charles. I’ll let you know the next time I’m back in New York,” she said with a smile before lowering her phone and tapping the screen to end the call. Dr. Austin raised a brow at the distressed and pensive looks spread across Tony, Steve, and Bucky’s faces, but decided not to ask.

“Any news from your friend, Doc?” Tony spoke up first.

“Yes,” Dr. Austin replied, tucking her cell phone into her white coat. “He confirmed that Y/N is in fact a mutant, but there’s something else.”

When Dr. Austin didn’t continue immediately, Tony flailed his arms up in the air. “Well? Were you pausing for dramatic effect or something?”

Dr. Austin rolled her eyes and ignored Tony’s outburst. “He was able to do a non-invasive read of her mind.” When all three men opened their mouths at once, Dr. Austin raised her hands, stopping them from whatever protests they were going to make. “Gentlemen, I assure you, the professor is an expert and powerful psychic himself, he knows what he’s doing. He told me that someone has manipulated her memories.”

Bucky blinked. “Well, yeah… isn’t that what happened when she accidentally linked with me? We already know this.”

“No, not recent memories,” Dr. Austin explained. “Her entire childhood has been wiped and rewritten.”

***

Connected Tags: @ginger-swag-rapunzel @that-one-gay-girl @fanofalltheficsx @joseyrw @lana-writes-04 @gia-25 @klanceiscannon14 @ahahafudge @genderfluid-ho

[mc-critical]

Since you said you just rewatched Isabella's arc, what do you think really happened at her end? Was she really killed or just sent away by boat to a monastery in Vienna like Suleiman said to Ibrahim? Hurrem told Nigar and Gul aga to throw them to sea, but scene was cut after Gul aga then said princess was still alive. A little hesitation seems to happen in Hurrem's face. Or maybe that really happened and Suleiman knew everything and just wanted to exculpate Hurrem so he kinda lied to Ibrahim? What do you think? :)

It remained more of a plot hole than anything, since the show didn't confirm it outright still, but I think there were much more hints given that Hürrem actually killed Isabella and SS eventually learned about it and covered for her than any other possible resolution for the plot line.

Hürrem was very adamant in throwing both Karmina and Isabella to Bosphorus and despite of the look she gave after Gül told her the princess was alive, there wasn't any indicator that she might have changed her mind. (or else they would have shown us, because think about it, would the show miss a chance in showing that Hürrem has some remorse/humanity left inside of her, even in regards to her enemies at this point? Highly doubt it.) Isabella and the servant were already gone in the morning and while I get why, say, Gülşah would wait until the morning to tell Mahidevran about her discovery through eavesdropping (she wasn't the brightest crayon in the room and the plot demanded it for a reason.), why would Nigar and Gül Aga wait until the morning to execute Hürrem's order? They knew full well that it was risky to keep her there, for that someone would find her sooner or later, Hürrem also knew that and wanted them to quickly deal with this problem (Nigar has shown her agency when it came to the orders of someone before, but given she helped with the poisoning, ordered by Ibrahim, that brought Karmina's death, would she risk Isabella being around to expose everything? And Gül Aga was unconditionally loyal to Hürrem.), so that's why I think they threw them both into Bosphorus before the morning came and were done with it.

Now, it would be something else if someone from SS's people found Isabella, told SS and he somehow intervened. Alright, but how and when exactly did that happen when SS had no idea whatsoever of what had happened to Isabella in the morning? Did he simply pull an act then? That would have been too much of a stretch, even for him. He wouldn't scold everyone and call for an investigation if he did. Even if he found out eventually, was there even a time for him to intervene? The episode was pretty tick with its plot threads, the pacing was very fast and we quickly, very quickly transitioned with Hürrem declaring her victory in front of little Mihrimah when we were still in day, while SS's confrontation with Hürrem was at night. How would he intervene and what would he do?  Make up a story and send Isabella back to her country instead? Actually, Melike Ipek Yalova once claimed that this is what happened in an interview, little Mustafa had that suspicion while Mahidevran was looking at the SS-Hürrem nightly confrontation as well, and that could be the truth and it makes what the show showed even messier as a result, but dizis are usually written week for week and Meryem Uzerli mentioned in her confession interview about her disappearance in S03 that the script was constantly changing due to Meral's illness, hence that could've been only one of the versions of what happened and Melike might have had no idea about what they ultimately chose. (similarly to Cansu Dere, who, as I discerned due to her take on Firuze's relationship with SS in the MC: "Secret World" documentary, had no idea about the poison twist, probably because that was revealed after Cansu left and they simply hadn't planned the twist in advance. Melike's last scene as Isabella was her confrontation with Hürrem before Hürrem gave the order to get rid of both Karmina and her.) In-universe, SS couldn't have possibly brought her back to her country in my opinion, why? Because he was so ready to use Isabella as a tool for his political game just until a while ago, wanted her as close as possible (that was his reasoning for having her in the harem) and while he may have given a sign to Ibrahim that he may do an exception with her as a state matter due to him having a halvet with her, wouldn't sending her to his country thwart all he had in mind entirely? Wouldn't that be a little too risky when SS declared her dead? (yes, Gritti sent a message to Frederick that Isabella was actually alive and Frederick planned to get her back somehow, but no one else next to him believed him about that and told him to stand still, hence most people still thought of her as dead and SS has no idea that Frederick and Gritti know.) Okay, maybe he wanted to protect Isabella from Hürrem doing something to her since she's too valuable as a state matter and he didn't want strife in his harem (or at least that's what he convinces himself), so he might have put her somewhere far from everyone. But wouldn't it be more logical to send her to Carl, just as he planned, again not a while ago? Maybe he wanted to have her somewhere no one expected her to be, but why in her country, he would lose political points like this?

If he brought her to a monastery for her to cleanse herself of her sins like he actually said, he gives up from using her as a political tool entirely.... why exactly? Because of Hürrem and because of protection, when he still prioritized politics over his harem after all? (and he said a few episodes ago that the empire cannot be ruled when you're influenced by a woman or her tears) He may have thought she was played enough and maybe he wanted to give her a closure, but again, we're back to when did that happen exactly when the events were running one after another? Yes, this way he would have a win-win and Isabella would be far and secluded from everyone, but where did all the grand plans with her go, how did it happen? He demanded investigation while Isabella was gone after all and if he found out from the investigation, I doubt he could've interfered, because I doubt Isabella survived a throw into Bosphorus or she somehow escaped herself or found a ship that could save her or something. Besides, what happened to Karmina then? If SS found out, she would've been thrown into Boshorus anyway, because she was dead and no one would leave Isabella hanging until he waited for the investigation results? And if not, what, his people would just drag Isabella along to a monastery off-screen? And would Isabella trust they even were SS's people after what happened to her in the harem? This would've been much of a chase. Even without people, how did SS order a boat in the middle of the night when what happened happened in the morning after? etc. etc.

I believe SS found out about this whole ordeal at a point when he couldn't have interfered anymore and made up a story to cover for Hürrem and the loss. This simply makes the most sense given the timeline of events. While we were still wondering what happened to Isabella, Valide heard Hürrem's words to Mihrimah, her telling SS and after a conversation between the foreigners that had nothing to do with Isabella, a transition between day and night happened. Then Hürrem is called by SS, Gül is worried and Hürrem tells him the following: "If you acted like this all day, everyone must have understood that it was you." (along with him being worried about Mahidevran telling SS about her suspicions, which hints even more that they were correct.) This says more than enough for me. Hürrem sees her order as executed and the results of SS's investigation must have come to him at the night and then he couldn't have done anything, but simply make up a story to save his dignity and Ego, what's done is done. The confrontation with Hürrem itself shows that SS already knows more about Hürrem's involvement in the matter than simply Valide's accusations: he looks madder than he would if Isabella wasn't a lost cause, he started to speak about how his kids should always know who he is and then switched to asking Hürrem to remember who she's standing in front of. She has apparently crossed a line, a pretty big line that went over SS's own head. He also says: "What kind of love is this, Hürrem?  Is love destroying? What's the limit of it? When will you stop? When will you be stopped?". Would he say that if she hasn't gone on the road to no return regarding Isabella? Yes, SS has punished her for something she hasn't done before in the past, he has played both with actions and words her and everyone else more than once, but this time these words leave room for something else. They hint that Hürrem has gotten what she wanted and that she couldn't be stopped, not even by him.

The confrontation with Ibrahim happened only the next day, after SS confronted Hürrem and came to terms with what happened. After all, he can't say outright, not even to Ibrahim who knew was against Hürrem and already doubted for other stuff, that Hürrem has done it under his nose. It would accommodate him much more to project the image of a higher authority who doesn't allow for stuff to happen without his knowledge and consent, for people to respect him as such and reconsider working behind his back or betraying his trust. SS wants absolute loyalty and when he can't get that or he suspects that he hasn't gotten that, he tends to remind everyone of how above them he is, no matter how much has he messed up himself or how right or wrong are his deeds.

I may be overthinking, because all this arc turned out to be was pointless fuel at the end of the day and I doubt they applied so much logic to it, but this is where I stand on its resolution.

[shyrose57]

Brothers anon back again. I had a sort of writers block for the last like 2 days which made it really hard to do some questions, but I got em done finally. Sorry about the wait. This one is split between the numbered questions, and next ask is the other questions you asked!

I think I accidentally skipped a question in the last one. I honestly don't completely remember but in case I did skip it by mistake, the groups first travel out of the city's limits and even further beyond in a carriage. When they reach the end of how far the driver is willing to go they then get out and start walking. With Jackie screaming about how their finally going on a adventure. 

1: It thankfully doesn't get to to bad before the others notice. And he immediately told them about Dream, wanting to be very clear with what happened and what they where getting themselves into. But they accepted him anyway and helped him. 

2: Isaac is the leader cause Cletus is too much of a wildcard and too impulsive to lead safely, Charles is too shy to lead, and while Benjamin is perfect for leading he doesnt really like leading and is more of a follower than a leader. But Isaac can joke around and gets along with everyone but also be able to take things seriously and know when something needs to be handled.

5: They do not, they last for a few minutes and unless its a healing or regeneration potion (in which it can take a few days for it to fully go away) they have no long lasting affects. They do know of eachothers past to an extent, they know enough to avoid triggers and enough to know what not to do when around eachother. They know through telling eachother, and they feel awful Grievous and Jackie had to deal with that, but leave it in the past and focus on making their current life better. 

6: Yes and no, while Jackie did mean to throw it at Ran, he ment for it to just hit nearby him, not directly hit him. It was ment to be more of a scare/intimidation tactic than anything else honestly. Grievous's luck is for basically everything, he has won the lottery twice before actually but only those 2 times, he's correctly guessed how many items are in a container more than a few times as well. 

7: I use the height charts and they help mostly for comparison, problem is I have trouble applying it to real world stuff and because of that I still have trouble knowing if something or someone is to tall or short. Jackie can get very mean, like he can make fun of someone who just lost a loved one or experienced a traumatic event at the worst. But he usually doesn't get nearly that mean, most he does normally is making fun of how someone looks or how they do certain things. The others comfort him the best they can when he gets sad, and when he gets mean they either encourage it (Grievous), or discourage it and stop him (Watson. Ran is between either encouraging or discouraging it).

8: He was! He spent most of his life adventuring actually! He misses it somedays now since he lives in Subbin, but he believes giving up his adventuring life for a family and friends who needed him is a more than far trade and would happily pick his family over adventuring again. For around 4 years after Ran left Mizu (including the day he left), Ran traveled everywhere, and learned how to survive himself and taught himself different things, like sewing. Ran has made new socks, fixed clothes, and made blankets for everyone at least once. Watson also designs bows and arrows for show, for top functionality, and for just simple (training) gifts to the others. Ran (and Watson) has visited the nether, though Ran tended to stay in it longer than Watson cause he could withstand the temperatures better. And while digging a new tunnel across the nether he ran into ancient debris, which he then messed with until he figured out to mix it with gold and coat his sword in it. He tried to find more ancient debris but sadly hasn't found any, leaving his sword permanently damaged and at risk of breaking. Jackie isn't good at all at painting, its more of a hobby he's trying out. They try to camp out there at least once a week, where Grievous will sometimes build a pillowfort and either force everyone inside or play a game of capture the fort with them. Sometimes Ran will also read during the pillowfort nights, but not to often. Jackie wants to vist a Snow, Savanna, Jungle,  Tagia, and if possible, a Ice Spike biome. He also wants to vist the nether but he'll have to fight Ran on that. Ran and Jackie's secondary titles are in Javanese!

9: Ran just kinda went "Hey Jackie, stand still for a second." "Ok?" And then he just picked him up and threw up. 

10: When he's first given dinner after already eaten lunch, he just kinda stares at the food. Then asks if they meant to give him food, and when the others say yes, he asks why because he thought people only ate once every few days. His answer shocked the others and they ask him to explain, and he explains futher that he was only allowed to eat and drink once every 3 days. Their horrified by this answer but explain to him how theres 3 meals a day and he can drink whenever, he doesn't believe them at first but eventually accepts it. 

11: When the fishermen first come to Ranbob about their worry, he expresses the same worry as them. But says that it's unlikely Ran will hurt the fishermen specifically, because Rans haunting are already friends with them, and Ran wouldnt risk breaking the friendship unless he deemed it necessary for their safety. 

12: Ranbob is sad that Ran goes to such lengths to avoid him and keep people away from him, but he has resigned himself to it. As he knew that if Ran was alive it was greatly unlikely that he would trust him and knew he would be avoided. Which is actually particularly why he believes Ran will never trust him again and why he views Ran as a kind of lost family member. One he'll never get back no matter what he does.

13: Their first stop is a nearby flower biome, and after that Watson has planned to lead them to a waterfall he found with a shattered Savanna somewhat close to it. They plan to travel for a minimum of 6 months, they can actually travel for as long as they want to, but Prokius made them agree that they must be back before the next General Pit Battles (which happens once every 5 years). 

14: He would 100% run himself into the ground until he's barely alive while searching for them. Benjamin compares Ranbob wanting to go back to Dream, to an abused person wanting to go back to their abusive lover. They believe they've changed and that they truly do love them and want the best for them, but in reality that's not it at all and others have to help them see thats not true and help them save themselves. So it doesn't surprise Benjamin or Isaac that much (it surprises Charles and Cletus though), and after its explained to them, their all more than willing to help Ranbob get over Dream and help him be himself again.

15: Oh definitely. Once they hear the Green-Eyed Enderman is back from hiding they all set out again, and after the group gets attacked and once word spreads that its in a group and there's another enderman with them, they all get targeted. With the Gladiators and Fishermen being targeted as bait or hostages to try to trick the enderman into following a trap. Ran wasnt affected like his brother was. Im talking about trauma and maybe even a bit of PTSD that came from Mizu, caused by Dream. Though both of the brothers have gained different amounts of trauma and PTSD from Dream. I may give the raven to either Watson or Ran, I think its fits both of them really well. I want to have them come across ruins of other Tales but im not sure which ones. Maybe they could find the remains of the Wild West Tale and the Haunted Mansion?

Glad to see you, Brothers Anon, and excited to read!

1: The perfect start to an Adventure. And a funny mental image. Imagining these two groups cramped into carriages is pretty amusing. How ready was everyone to get out by the time they could?

2: The fishermen are really great, and Ranbob is very lucky. I love them.

3: Isaac sounds like he’s a pretty good fit for it then. But nobody’s perfect! What are some flaws of his, leadership-wise?

5: Interesting. What makes Regeneration and Healing last longer? I suppose it’s not relative to the AU, but I am a bit curious. What’s the world’s potions mechanisms, if you don’t mind me asking? And that’s good! They may not know everything, but they know what to avoid, and that’s important. Everyone’s moved forward and are making the best of life, and honestly, that’s pretty cool of them.

6: Welp, Jackie, it seems intimidation tactic failed. However, you have managed to anger Ran, so..there’s that. He won the lottery? Dang. Well, if they ever need money, they can just send him to the nearest casino, I suppose.

7: Aight, so I may have a solution for you there. Whatever height you’re going for, find something in real life that’s just about the same height. Like a tree, or something. Or not, we can always just leave it at short enough to be tossed and tall enough to be the tosser. Jackie sounds like he knows where to hit to make it hurt, honestly. It’s good that they comfort him, though I am curious why they all react as they do to him being mean. Why does Grievous encourage it? And is it more of a depends on the day thing for Ran, or a depends on what was said to Jackie, and what Jackie’s saying thing?

8: Nice! What kind of places did he go? Does he have any particularly interesting knickknacks from that time period? And Ran personally sounds like he knows what he’s doing. Watson’s weapons sound really cool, where did he learn to make them? Is visiting the Nether not a common occurrence these days? Or is it simply that the others never got around to it before? Well, hobbies are always fun to try. Does Jackie keep at it and get better or get bored and try something else? How does Capture the Fort go with these guys, considering they’re gladiators? Why does Jackie want to visit those particular biomes? Is there a reason, or do they just sound cool to him? And why would Ran not want them going to the Nether? Because of the danger?

9: FDXGHJ- He just- tossed him?? No warning?? Oh my gods, I’m dying. How did Jackie react to that? Heck, how did Porkius react to that? I doubt anyone was expecting that display.

10: Oh, no. Now I really want to punch Dream in the face. What the heck, Dream?! He legit asks if they meant to give him food...If one of the fishermen or gladiators doesn’t eventually find a way to punch Dream, I will be forced to travel realities and do it myself. 

11: Kind of sad that Ranbob was equally concerned about it. But hey! He won’t have to be, one day!

12: Poor Ranbob. I hope he’s proven wrong, eventually. Do the fishermen know that he thinks this? If so, how do they feel about it? Or does he kind of just keep those thoughts to himself?

13: Flower biomes are really pretty. What did everyone think about it? Did they bring any flowers with them? So this roadtrip could possibly go on for a few years. Did they leave just after a General Pit Battle, or do they have like, less than five years? Speaking of General, is Jackie still the General in this AU? Does he have extra duties because of it? Or is that not something that happened in this AU?

14: Yikes. Reactions to this? Why does Ranbob believe Dream’s changed, as you put it? Is Dream still able to talk to him, or is it because he just misses being there? So Benjamin and Isaac aren’t all that surprised about it. Do they take the reins in helping out? And how do they all do so? It’s good that they’re helping him though.

15: Well, this sounds like it can’t end well. They try to use the hauntings as bait? Is anyone actually captured? Rescue missions? And alright, that makes a bit more sense. I can see how they’d both be effected differently, and honestly, they’d probably both have very different perspectives of the event, all things considered. Ravens for the win! And it’d be really cool for them to come across the ruins of old Tales buildings. Can you imagine the kind of things they’d find? Diaries, faded photographs, moth-eaten clothes, blood stained floors...Like a walk in the past, but they’ll never know what came to be for the people of that time.

[yodawgiherd]

Too Close For Comfort pt.2

>>>Read on AO3<<<

Second part of the "annoying couple" AU hope that you'll enjoy it :)

Armin liked Eren. Armin liked Mikasa. Armin hated them together.

Was he overreacting? Hell no. Don’t believe him? Fine.

Let’s play a little scene then.

A movie was coming out, but not just any movie. It’s a movie from a series that both Eren and Armin used to watch religiously, a continuation of a long saga that had them on the edge of their seats. Armin was counting days until it comes out, and the second it hit the streaming platforms his heart doubled its beat rate. Then again, an event like this shouldn’t be experienced alone. He and Eren had watched every part of the saga up until now, and it would be rude not to make a little watch-together. So, Armin picked up a phone.

Eren was ecstatic same as Armin, immediately agreeing that he will come over in the evening. Sadly, he can’t go right now, because he is with Mikasa in the gym, and:

“You know that I can’t cut our training Ar, we need it for the fights.”

There it is again. Our training. We need it. It’s only Mikasa who does martial arts, not Eren, but apparently, they are no longer separate individuals. But fine, Armin was hyped for the movie and willing to wait a few hours.

Before you ask, no – it was not rude not to invite her too. Mikasa watched one of the movies with them, and her comment of: “Man, this is kinda dumb.”, almost made Armin explode. She, who still rewatches the Twilight saga from time to time, had the gall to call another movie stupid. Armin seethed, and it didn’t get better because the ultimate simp that Eren is, he only nodded and said: “Ye, it doesn’t make sense sometimes.”

Heresy.

Ok, all right, hopefully Mikasa will be exhausted from the gym and she will want to relax on her own, maybe go for a swim in the pool at Eren’s house. She loved that pool but Armin had his issues with it, ever since he caught the two of them having sex in it once. Call him a prude, but Armin had no intention of swimming in water tainted by little Erens, if you catch his drift. And sure, the pool had filtration and whatnot, but still…

Chasing that horrible memory out of his mind, Armin made the preparation. Popcorn, drinks, snacks, the couch in just the perfect distance from the TV. Everything must be the best because this movie will be the best.

Ah, there’s the door.

Yet when Armin opened, his heart fell to his stomach and the smile was hard to keep. Eren was there, looking excited as ever, but the goth visage next to him was also present.

“Sorry that it took us so long,”, Eren hugged him, “Miki was doing her make-up.”

She giggled and poked him in the ribs, he caught her hand to press a kiss to the knuckles, and Armin was once again feeling like a third wheel on a date. Despite all this, the blond was a little bit hopeful. Maybe Mikasa will keep silent for once and lets him borrow Eren for a few hours. Maybe everything can work out.

So, Armin smiled and nodded and ushered his welcome guest ( and his plus one) into the living room. They fell together on the couch in the most customary positions – Armin in one corner, Eren in the middle, and Mikasa in the other, her legs picked up and resting in her boyfriend’s lap. With a click, the movie began.

It was fine at the start. Mikasa cared not for the movie, but she was on her phone, probably browsing Twitter or Pinterest or something, looking for new outfit ideas. The movie was amazing too, and Eren’s eyes were glued to the screen, his gasps in sync with Armin’s. That bliss lasted for about an hour and a half, and Armin couldn’t be happier. But then….

With a sigh, Mikasa pocketed her phone, her eyes sliding towards the TV. Just like that, the alarms went off in Armin’s head, because Mikasa was bored and that is bad, bad news. In a faint attempt to prolong his happy time, he asked her if she could go and grab a few more drinks from the fridge, knowing that there are none. She smiled and agreed, coming back to announce what Armin already knew.

“You’re out, there are no more.”

“Oh but that’s a shame.”, Armin lied through his teeth, “Would you be so nice to go buy some?”

She smiled and said sure, only pausing to press a quick kiss to Eren’s cheek. He mumbled something like “I love you babe” and then she was gone, letting Armin blow out the breath he was holding.

In this story, Mikasa was portrayed as the villain, but that’s NOT how Armin felt about her. She was a great girl, an amazing friend, and overall one of the best people that he knew. It’s that her inseparableness from Eren was driving Armin up the wall. Successfully pulling them apart with his innocent request, the blond settled into the couch, intent on enjoying the rest of the movie with Eren.

Curse Mikasa and her perfect physique.

She was back in fifteen minutes, not the hour that Armin expected, apparently jogging the entire way there and back. With a thin sheet of sweat to prove it, that she ran with several kilograms in her backpack, Mikasa quickly washed her face and was seated on the couch again, not even pulling her phone out this time. And like that, Armin’s movie party began to crumble.

It started with light touches on Eren’s nape, her black nails gently scratching the sensitive skin there. He leaned into the touch, a stupid smile spread across his face, and Armin wanted to punch him for that. They exchanged a few whispers, a few giggles, and then she was climbing into Eren’s lap as it was her rightful place. Five minutes later, Eren couldn’t care less about the movie.

The sounds of their aggressive make-out session were invading Armin’s ears, no matter how hard he tried to block it out. The strange sucking sound, the way Mikasa craned her head back and giggled when Eren planted kisses on her pale neck, her long hair creating a midnight curtain behind her. Because they were seventeen and a pair of horny teenagers, it did not end there. Risking a quick peek to the right, Armin saw that one of Eren’s hands was on Mikasa’s ass, bunching her short skirt between his fingers. It rode up, revealing the naked skin covered by black panties and fishnets, and Armin was feeling sick.

Objectively speaking, it was a very aesthetically pleasing ass. Mikasa went hard on her leg days, and it showed, but it didn’t feel right to the blond. She was practically his sister, and he had no intention of ogling his sister’s ass, no matter how perfect it was. With Eren being his brother, more or less, it was like having his sister being groped by his brother while their tongues are cramming into each other’s throats and…

Wait no, that came out wrong. They were very far from Alabama.

Differently then – it was his best friend kissing his other best friend (female), being loud and obnoxious about it, and all Armin wanted was to watch the movie. In his corner, he prayed that this is it, that they won’t nudge the clothing aside and go at it right here because the way Mikasa’s hips ground into Eren’s suggested that it wasn’t that far off. Please no. God, please no.

They didn’t.

Another hour of suffering later, the movie was done. Eren left with a stupid smile, holding Mikasa’s hand and looking like he just received a beating. All the black smudges on his face could easily be mistaken for bruises. Armin, who had a faint feeling that his movie night was nothing but foreplay to them, put the movie to play again, intent on enjoying the second half without the embarrassing sounds coming from his couch.

There. Convinced? No? Okay then…

What pissed him off next was the evolution of Eren into the ultimate simp for Mikasa. At first, it was a joke only, something Jean would say to piss him off, but as years progressed the joke was slowly but surely easing into reality. Mikasa wasn’t any better, Annie claimed when they were complaining to each other over the phone, and Armin wondered if a woman could be called a simp too.

A few proofs, if you will:

Proof 1: Eren and Jean were playing videogames at his house. Jean was losing for once, so Eren kept teasing him, but its all in good spirit and the games were getting more and more competitive. But then, a phone rang.

“Hi, Mimi, what’s up?”

If there was a word Jean would like to erase from a dictionary, it would be Mimi.

The rest of the conversation was quick, and Eren hung up with a stupid smile on his face. That expression was known to all his friends because he wore it anytime when being around Mikasa.

“I have to go.”

The controller cluttered on the table, the door closed, and he was gone.

Proof 2: Mikasa never skipped her training, and Annie liked that about her. Yet today would end such tradition because in the middle of their sparring Eren walked into the gym. Mikasa’s concentration took a nosedive out of the window, Annie got pissed, and Eren offered that he will take his girlfriend out for ice cream. She changed in about a minute and was gone, forcing Annie to take her frustration out on the punching bag.

It didn’t survive her wrath.

Proof 3: This was supposed to be a scouting mission, Sasha and Connie took the two dorks to see how Niccolo, Sasha’s new favorite cook, was doing in the restaurant he worked in. The test was about food but it got ruined as soon as the appetizers came in. Because instead of eating and rating it, like normal humans, Mikasa and Eren began feeding each other tiny bites, interlacing the food with kisses, and overall just being the cringiest and most annoying couple that there is. Connie excused himself, saying that he needs to throw up, and Sasha followed, knowing that the lunch was ruined.

They grabbed a disappointing burger together, both agreeing that taking Eren and Mikasa to any social occasion is a waste of time.

Proof 4: This was a study session, a thing that they were doing together for a long, long time. Armin was smart, Mikasa was bright, and Eren was determined to catch up. Usually. Now, everything was different. Ever since they changed from kids to teenagers and eased into intimacy, they were insufferable. Even studying was impossible because while Mikasa was eyeing the textbook, at least in the start, Eren very successfully distracted her by putting his head on her shoulder and kissing her neck. Soon the book was forgotten, clattering on the ground, while they tumbled together on the bed, lost in each other. Recognizing the situation, Armin made a swift exit, closing the door just in time because a second later Mikasa’s black bra thumped into the wood.

Proof 5: Now they were all together, doing one of the things that Mikasa enjoyed. A dark magic séance, with an Ouija board between them, the goth taking the lead since she is the only one who knows anything about this stuff. Armin was bored because he is a man of science and not ghosts. Sasha was eating chips from under the table and Connie was doing his best to steal them unnoticed. Jean looked surprised that he’s even here, unsure what came over him to agree when Mikasa asked him to attend. And Eren? Eren was staring at her like she’s made of gold, hanging on every word she says.

Following her instructions, they put their hands on the triangle, waiting for the séance mistress to call out to the ghosts. She did so, muttering some spells under her breath too, and then it was the time to ask a question. Was it something funny? Was it something genuinely interesting?

Nope.

“Who does Eren like the most?”, was her query, and Armin could hear the collective groan that ran around the table.

Surprising exactly no one, the triangle starts moving, spelling out Mikasa’s name. Now if he’s being honest, Armin couldn’t see anyone actively doing it, but it must be her – she has enough strength in her fingertips to drag them all. A few more tugs later, her name was complete, and a huge grin spread on the goth’s black lips.

“I knew it!”, she giggled all excited over nothing, leaning over to kiss her boyfriend, who abandoned the board in favor of holding her against him.

It’s way too long to be a thank-you kiss, way too loud, and Jean couldn’t take it anymore. He was gone as the first person, but before Sasha could discreetly follow Mikasa broke away from Eren, eyeing everyone.

“So, what do we ask next?”

Enough? Enough.

Or no, there was one more thing that Armin despised. It’s Eren talking about his intimate life.

Growing up together, any sort of decency sense disappeared, and it certainly didn’t help that Eren wanted to boast, since he was boning the hottest girl in the whole town.

Armin heard it all. He heard about their first time, he heard about the first time Mikasa was on top. He heard about the different positions they tried. One day, he was dumb enough to ask why does Eren have bruises on his neck. What he got was a fifteen-minute presentation when Eren described just how tight Mikasa can squeeze with her thighs when he makes her come on his face.

Armin wanted to die every minute of that speech.

Look, he was happy for them, but he didn’t need to hear it. He didn’t need to know that Mikasa bought handcuffs and they are using them in the bedroom. He didn’t need to hear that Eren is planning to gift her a riding crop for Valentine’s, because they both adored the spice.

No, just no.

All these events, all these humiliating experiences culminated into a desperate meeting of everyone save for those two, where they thought about what to do.

“We have to make an intervention.”, Jean said, holding his head in his hands, “This is not normal.”

“They are dating for like what, nine years now?”, Sasha counted, “It wasn’t that bad before, what happened?”

“The sex.”, Armin deadpanned, having his sources, “It’s the sex.”

The only thing that Eren could talk about lately.

“They are not even two people anymore.”, Connie thought out loud, “It’s like they merged into a single entity. Eren and Mikasa became…. Mikeren?”

“I’m all for the merge idea, but your name sucks.”, Jean laughed “I have a better one – Erekasa.”

A few more ideas flew here and there, each dumber than the other until Armin got one.

“Eremika?”

“Yea that’s good.”

“Not bad.”

“I can see that…”

“Okay!”, Armin proclaimed, “So let’s plan this Eremika intervention. It’s cool that have each other, but not everyone gets the love of their life when 9 years old.”

“Hear hear.”, Jean agreed.

They planned everything. Set up a date, gathered, and waited until the two came home, ready and willing to unload their years of frustration on them.

But… they didn’t show up.

Later, Armin would find out that they didn’t come because Eremika was having an ice-cream date. With no mental capacity to do this again, because a small part of him felt like an asshole for even trying to set it up, the intervention squad fell apart.

It did get better, with time and space, because Eren and Mikasa grew a little bit older and a little bit wiser. It did nothing to diminish the flames of their passion, but they were no longer so obnoxious about it. And looking at them now, Armin could only wish that he would someday find love so beautiful as theirs.

*raise a glass*

To Eren and Mikasa!

“All right, this should be good.”

Looking over the paper, Armin frowned.

“Maybe too long though, I should…”

Re-reading what he wrote, the blond erased a few parts, shortening the text. After all, the speech should not be that long, he was not here as a star of the show.

A knock on the door interrupted him, and then there was a familiar brown-haired head peeking in.

“Hey Ar, you ready?”

Pocketing the paper, he nodded at his friend.

“I hope that I won’t let you down with the speech.”

“Please…”, Eren’s grin was still the same, even after all these years, “There’s a reason why I chose you to be my best man, you never disappoint.”

Following the groom, Armin soon arrived back in the hall where the reception was taking place. Eren slid back into his seat, automatically reaching out to intertwine his fingers with his now-wife, wearing that same stupid smile he always had. Armin remained standing, clearing his throat, and feeling everyone’s eyes on him. Well, here goes nothing.

“I liked Eren. I liked Mikasa. I hated them together…..”

The plane gently hummed all around them, carrying the newlyweds towards the location of their honeymoon. A private island, owned by Krista’s too-rich father, one he so generously borrowed them. Ignoring the empty seats, Mikasa was curled in Eren’s lap, head tucked under his chin, and neither of the two couldn’t be happier. Still, a single tiny thing was worming around in Eren’s mind.

“Mrs. Yeager?”, he got Mikasa’s attention, making her smile go even wider.

She loved when Eren called her that, although their full legal name was Ackerman-Yeager now. Equality was always an important part of their relationship.

“Can you believe that they had an intervention for us?”, Eren continued, “Were we really that obnoxious when dating?”

Mikasa thought about it for a moment. Thought about all the friends she stood up, all the events she left to be with him, all the times Armin had to witness their kisses. Knowing the answer, she giggled as she lied out loud.

“Nah.”

[smloshie]

“Again and Again”

A Shayne Topp x Reader imagine

Word count: 3357

A/N: yo what’s up, another poorly written Shayne one shot.

So I know most of this stuff is inaccurate to the actual events that took place/sleeping arrangements/etc., but that’s the wonder of fan fiction! I can do whatever the fuck I want! In this one, Shayne goes on a quest to become a living Ken doll and cuts his dick off.

I’m kidding, that’s terrible. Sorry, I’m not funny.

Synopsis: During Smosh Winter Games, your boyfriend of 2 years breaks up with you over text. Shayne tries to assure you that everything will turn out okay. Angst and slight fluff.

TW: cursing, Wes

>>>>><<<<<

When you were asked to be part of the crew for the Smosh Winter Games, you ecstatically accepted. What could be better than going to stay at a huge-ass log cabin with a ton of your closest friends?

The morning that you were meant to leave, you woke up without a single hesitation. You swiftly got dressed into one of your favorite shirts, a flannel, and jeans. You didn’t really have any other options as most of your clothes were packed into your suitcase, which was waiting by the door for you. You grabbed a granola bar from your pantry and ate it for a quick breakfast while pulling out your phone to call your boyfriend, Ethan. After 3 rings, he picked up.

“Hello?” His groggy voice came through your phone’s speaker.

“Hey! I’m leaving my place now so,” you grabbed your water bottle to fill it up, balancing your phone in between your shoulder and ear, “I just wanted to call you to let you know that I love you and I’ll see you when I get back!”

“Okay.” He sounded kinda off to you. He was either tired or irritated, but you were in too good of a mood to let his ‘I’m not going to tell you what’s wrong, but I want you to ask and make sure I’m okay’ attitude get to you.

“Uh, alright then! I’ll... see you in a few days!

-

Everyone was asked to be at the office relatively early, since it was a pretty long drive ahead of you. You and your luggage were escorted to a van. You ended up riding in what became, “Awesome Car One” and rode with Wes, Sohinki, Lasercorn, and Shayne. Before you knew it, you were off on the road trip to Big Bear Lake. After about 30 minutes of driving, a vlog camera was passed around and shoved into your face.

“(Y/N)! What are you most excited for?” Lasercorn asked, his eyes wide with anticipation.

“Sledding, a hundred percent! I used to do it as a kid but since it doesn’t snow in California, I haven’t done it since I moved out here.” You explained

“Okay, I didn’t need your entire damn life story.” He replied bringing the camera back to face him.

“Don’t be so mean, she was just reminiscing!” Wes came to your defense.

“Thank you, Wes!” You smiled at him. You felt your phone vibrate and looked down to see a text from Sarah.

Olivia just got car sink and threw up on the side of the road

*sick

You laughed and remembered part of the conversation you all had earlier.

“Hey, you guys remember how we were talking about Olivia not surviving in the cold?” You asked. They all murmured ‘yes's and ‘yeah’s.

“Well apparently she just threw up on the side of the road because of motion sickness,” you laughed.

“Oh shit, is she okay?” Shayne laughed slightly.

“Probably!” You shrugged your shoulders.

-

After hours of driving, you and everyone else finally arrived at the log cabin (or mansion.) You hopped out of the car and started to stretch. Being in a cramped car for a few hours straight was pretty rough on the joints.

You headed behind the van to help unload your group’s luggage. Shayne pulled your suitcase out for you and handed it to you.

“Thank you, kind valet!” You took the case from him and smiled.

“Valet? I thought I’d at least be butler status by now…” he said, looking disappointed as he grabbed his own bag from the back.

“Maybe some other day. Just not today,” you laughed. The two of you began to walk towards the front door of the cabin. Sarah walked up next to you guys.

“Hey guys! (Y/N), we’re staying downstairs,” She said. She wasn’t carrying anything, so you assumed she had already settled in.

“Okay, awesome- oh, wait! How’s Olivia doing?” You asked.

“Oh right, did she throw up anymore?” Shayne tagged on to your question.

“Yea, yea. She’s fine! Actually, she literally started complaining about being hungry immediately after she threw up so…” Sarah responded. You giggled at her seemingly quick recovery.

Once you stepped into the place, you looked around for the staircase that would lead downstairs.

“It’s this way,” you heard a voice say behind you. You turned and saw Shayne smiling at you, standing in front of the staircase. You smiled back and followed him down the stairs.

“Jesus Christ, the size of this place is kinda terrifying…” You nervously laughed and looked around at all the log and stone decorations. You were pretty sure you even saw fake bear skins hanging from some ceiling beams.

“Yea, but it’s kinda really awe-“

“Y’know this huge-ass mansion is basically built on stilts, so it could all come down at any second!” Lasercorn came in, interrupting Shayne. He looked at him, disapprovingly.

“Shut up, we’ll be fine.” Shayne placed his hand on the wooden wall and leaned back casually. The floorboards above you guys creaked, causing Shayne’s eyes to widen and Lasercorn’s smile to grow.

“Yea, I’m sure we’ll be fine…” he laughed and walked away, leaving just you two in the room.

“I don’t know who else is staying in this room, but I’m for sure calling the top bunk.” You said, chucking your suitcase to the top of a bunk bed with the might of Zeus.

Shayne laughed, “I guess I’ll go bottom bunk then.” He placed his bag on the bed underneath yours.

“Shayne Topp is now… Shayne Bottom…” you whispered to yourself. Shayne heard you.

“That joke sucked.”

-

After everyone settled into their rooms, beds, and spaces, a few of you decided to go to the living room and hang out with each other. Pizza was ordered, drinks were had, people were testing out the hot tub, and the whole night was just like a big family reunion. It was rare that you all were in the same place at the same time, so you just kind of looked around the room and took it all in. Your thoughts were soon interrupted by Shayne's presence. He hopped up and sat on the back of the couch, behind you. You looked up at him and smiled.

“Hey,” you said, casually.

“I wanna play ping pong but I need another player; you down?” He asked you, raising an eyebrow.

You laughed, “Sure, but I’m kind of a natural Forrest Gump at ping pong.”

He called your bluff, “Yea, okay. Sure.” The two of you giggled as you headed to the game room.

-

After 4 matches, the two of you were tied up.

“Loser has to put his dick in a mound of snow.” You said, playfully.

“Wh- hey! Are you assuming that you’re going to win?” He defensively raised his hands.

“Is it really an assumption if it’s so obviously going to happen?” You quipped back.

“I- what?” He shook his head, “whatever, I’m into snow anyway. She’s my babe.”

You giggled as you bounced the ping pong ball and hit it gently towards him. He hit it back. You hit it at him, he hit it back. This went on for a while, (y‘know, like a game of ping pong?) Eventually you did whatever the ping pong-equivalent of spiking was. It bounced so hard on his side of the table that it ended up flying over his head. Your mouth formed an O and your arms shot up as he failed to hit the ball back.

“OOHHH SHIT! Have fun catching hypothermia, frosty dick!” You teased.

“You were serious? I thought you were kidding…” Shayne whined.

“Okay so maybe don’t pull down your pants and do it, but you gotta put snow down the front of your pants.” You reasoned. Shayne groaned.

“Fine, I’ll be right back.” He stepped out of the room to run and get a handful of snow from outside. While he was gone, you decided to check your phone. You saw that you had a text from Ethan so you unlocked your phone to read it.

Honestly, you were expecting a ‘good night’ text, as it was pretty late. Instead, your eyes focused on the words ‘I’m sorry’ in a sea of other words and phrases. Phrases like ‘it’s just getting too hard’ and ‘it’s not you, it’s me’ and ‘I hope we can still be cool after this.’ Your stomach dropped.

Was this really happening?

Shayne burst into the room, interrupting whatever thoughts were racing through your mind.

“Okay, I’m back! I had to run past everyone before the snow melted, so that’s going to be fun to explain later.” He was almost out of breath, “you ready?”

Like a switch was flipped, your face lit up as you turned to face him.

“I think the real question is, are you ready?” You laughed, trying to wash what just happened out of your brain

-

You woke up the next morning on the top bunk. Normally, your first instinct would be to check your phone, but last night’s events suddenly came flooding back. You decided to hold off on checking the phone for now. Instead you just laid on your back, staring at the ceiling. You went on like that for a while before realizing that the room you were in was eerily quiet. However, you could hear voices coming from upstairs. Everyone must have been awake already. Though you were dreading it, you leaned over to check the time on your phone. 11:34 A.M. You were all going to go sledding at 12, but in all honesty, you didn’t think you could. You really wanted to get your mind off of Ethan, but you also wanted to stay isolated so that you could have time to process your feelings. Almost on cue, as always, Shayne entered the room.

“Are you still sleeping?” He asked. He stepped onto the second leg of the ladder leading to your bunk, and peered over the edge to look at you.

“No I’m awake, just… hanging out.” You responded, trying to sound as normal as possible.

“Oh, okay. Well get ready! We’re finally going sledding!” He excitedly shook your blanket and jumped down from the ladder.

“Uh- actually, Shayne?” You called out. He turned to you.

“Yea?”

“Just, um… I don’t know if I’m really- y’know I’m just really not… I’m not really feeling sledding right now.” You managed to say. He looked confused.

“Really? But you were so excited! Are you sure?” He had a right to be confused. He knew you wouldn’t skip out on what you had been looking forward to most. At least, not for no reason. But not only did he know when something was wrong, he also knew your limits and when you really didn’t want to talk about something.

“Yea, maybe later today.” You pulled your blankets up over your shoulders.

“Okay then… is there something bothering you that I should know about? Anything at all?”

You sniffled silently. You prayed he didn’t hear that, “No, no… I’m totally fine! Just y’know sometimes people just don’t feel like doing stuff.” You tried to justify yourself in the most vague but reasonable way possible. Shayne finally decided to let it go.

“Okay,” he began to walk towards the door but hung back in the doorway, “See you later then?”

You were near tears, so you didn’t want to verbally answer. So instead you nodded, but remembered he probably couldn’t see you. You shot a thumbs up into the air for him to see. He hummed in acknowledgement before closing the door and heading back upstairs.

This shit really hurt. Not only did you just get broke up with by someone that you were planning a future with, but you had to keep it hidden from everybody. You didn’t want to be the one to ruin everyone’s time and make their fun getaway into some comfort-fest, where you were the guest of honor.

Tears streamed down the sides of your face. You rolled over and tried to go back to sleep, but you just couldn’t. Instead you put in your earbuds and listened to some music, while staring at the ceiling. You stayed like this for a few minutes.

A few minutes turned into a few hours.

A few hours turned into the whole day.

Shayne came in after sledding to bring you some food, but you dismissed him. You told him you weren’t hungry. He didn’t believe you, but he could tell that you still weren’t ready to talk about whatever was bothering you yet. He wanted to give you time.

-

Everyone eventually filed into their rooms and bunks to get ready for bed and go to sleep. The lights went out and people started falling asleep. You couldn’t sleep, so you quietly got out of bed and walked up the creaking wooden stairs and into the kitchen.

It was sweet of Shayne to bring you food earlier, and you regretted turning it down. As you opened the fridge, your stomach growled. It was pretty loud, considering the house was quiet. Every once and a while you’d hear giggles, snores, coughs, and other various noises.

You grabbed the milk jug out of the fridge and gently placed it on the counter behind you before tip-toeing to the cabinet and opening it carefully. You made yourself a bowl of cereal. You sat down at one of the kitchen island’s stools and began eating, though something felt off. You felt a presence in the room. You slowly turned your head and looked into the pitch-black doorway that led to the living room. You saw a shadowy figure staring back at you.

“Hey Shayne.” You directed your attention back to your bowl. He approached you with a smile.

“Did I scare you?” He asked, casually assuming the position of leaning against the kitchen island, across from you.

“Not really, I knew it was you.” You shrugged with a silent laugh.

“What? How?”

“The outline of you is… distinguishable? I think that’s the right word. I dunno, muscular.” You paused. Was that weird to point out? I mean, everyone made jokes about his… buffness. Why were you thinking so much about this?

“Oh, why thank you!” His smiled grew and he looked down at his feet.

“Though, I will admit; I hardly recognized you without your beanie.” He looked back up at you and made a face.

“Well yea, it's… nighttime. I don’t sleep in it.” He laughed, “so are you going to tell me what’s up?” His smile quickly switched to a more caring demeanor. You couldn’t stop looking at his kind eyes and sweet smile. He really wanted you to be okay.

“Ethan… broke up with me.” You looked down. Saying it out loud was weird. The words fell out of your mouth and seemed to float in the air and hang in front of your face. The realization hit once more, and so did the crying. You blinked back tears, but each time you moved your eyelashes, more and more fell. You brought your hand up to your eyes and wiped your face. He wasn’t saying anything, so you looked up at him. His brows were furrowed and his jaw was clenched. You waited in silence for a while. He finally spoke.

“I always fucking hated that guy.” You didn’t know how to react to that. You couldn’t exactly be offended, but it was definitely a crude reaction. “Sorry, sorry. I just meant that- well… I just always got that weird feeling that he was going to hurt you.”

“Why didn’t you say anything?” You wiped more tears away with your hand.

“Well… I always wanted to. I would overhear you talking about manipulative things he would do, but then the next day you were fine. And while I didn’t like seeing you hurt, I knew that it wasn’t exactly my place to talk.”

“That’s… bullshit.” You said. He seemed taken aback, “Sorry. I just- I get it. But I really wish you had said something. It would’ve been so much easier for me to end things from a friend telling me what they saw, instead of him ending things for seemingly no reason. I guess I’m just sick of losing people that mean a lot to me. I’m sick of forming relationships with people that leave me.”

He looked so sad to hear you say those words. You should’ve stopped there, but the floodgates were open. You began rambling like a frantic mess.

“How is someone as fucked up as me supposed to ever share myself with someone again? H-How do I know I can trust someone before I give a part of me away to them? How will I know they w-won’t leave me like everyone el-“

He cuts you off by grabbing your body and wrapping his arms around you. You hadn’t realized that during that time, he had circled the island and appeared by your side.

“Hearing you think like that is so… upsetting. I know I can’t say or do much to prevent you from thinking that way, but please- please just know that you still have your entire life to find the perfect person who will make you feel like you’re worth every second.” He seemed to plead with you. He was begging you to see yourself how he saw you.

In that moment, in that position… you realized you liked having his arms around you. The feeling it gave you was sheer perfection compared to how your ex made you feel. With your ear on him, you could hear his heartbeat and it was beating fast. You managed to stutter out a few words with your face pressed into his body.

“Thank you.” You removed your head from his chest, and looked up at him. You were met with his bright blue eyes. While you couldn’t hear his heartbeat anymore, yours became increasingly more noticeable to you. Your tears stopped falling, and time seemed to slow. His face inched closer to yours, and you tilted your chin up. You didn’t know what was happening, but it felt like a magnet was pulling you towards each other. Eventually, after what seemed like way too long for your liking, your lips connected.

You liked Shayne.

The two of you kept kissing, neither of you really wanted to stop. It grew increasingly more intense. This was something that Shayne had been waiting for. Not just for the kiss, but for you. His hands were placed firmly on your back, and slowly began to adjust to your body. Your hands ran through his hair, silent sighs escaping your mouth. What you were doing felt so good, but you knew it had to end. You pulled away slowly, and gently opened your eyes, where you were once again met with his.

“Sorry, that was way too soon. I shouldn’t have done that.” He began nervously running his hand through his hair. He looked kinda really hot like that...

“No it’s okay! That was good. I’m… good. I liked it.” You tried to keep him from overthinking it. He looked up at you with hope in his eyes.

“Really?”

“Yea really. I agree that the timing was kinda… poor. But it was a good thing that I would like to happen again.”

“Again?”

“Yea… again. As in, I would like to kiss you Shayne. Again… and again...” You smiled and looked down at your feet. He bit his lip to prevent an excited giggle from escaping. He cleared his throat in an attempt to keep his cool.

“Do you… want a hot drink?” He asked. You nodded.

-

The two of you spent the rest of the night, sitting on the couch and talking. About Ethan, about each other, about… everything. You held the warm mug of hot cocoa in your hands. You couldn’t drink it, your stomach wouldn’t allow you; there were way too many butterflies doing acrobatics in there. Eventually, the two of you decided to turn in for the night.

The next day came, and you went sledding.

[wondertrashh]

Life Line

A/N: It’s finally here! I know I promise this a month ago, but with everything that’s been going on in the world life been kinda wild. This is a LOOONG one, so get a snack and drink. Let me know if you guys want an epilouge (I have a strong feeling you will). As always reader is gender neutral so everyone can enjoy!

TW // Blood, death

Summary: Reader knew the day they were going to die since they were young. They told themself that they would not be involved with someone when the date comes. Well, that's what they wanted to do until Lena came into Reader’s life.

Lena Luthor x Alien!Reader

Word Count: 4,183 (This one definitetly got away from me)

May 21st, 2019. That was the day you were going to die. You have known this since you were 10 years old. You found out after you pissed off a witch you met while playing in the woods. You never told anyone about this information. At first, you didn’t believe the witch thinking that she told you a random date just to scare you and you let her know that. When you told her that she decided to show you that she wasn’t lying by predicting several things that would happen throughout your life. She predicated your first girlfriend at age 14, the death of your parents at age 16 and even what college you would get accepted in. Every time one of her predictions came true you became more freaked out. After your first girlfriend, you tried everything you could to make sure that the witch’s last prediction didn’t come true. However, after you received a full-ride scholarship offer from that exact college, you practically had a mental breakdown. 

---

August 21st, 2018

You are currently on your way to LCorp to meet up with Lena so you guys can go out for lunch. You two have been having lunch together every Wednesday for almost a year. You almost canceled today because it was the 21st, meaning that you only had 9 months left. You have accepted knowing the date a long time ago. You were perfectly content with your life and had made peace with it. That was until Lena came into your life over a year ago. Lena made you feel things you never felt before. Lena made you feel alive and happy to see another day. You fully intended on breaking things off with Lena in the beginning of the year. But, the more time you spent with her the more you fell in love. When the day you finally built up the courage to end things was the same day Lena confessed her feelings and you just couldn’t bring yourself to do it. So, now you guys have been dating for almost a year and she makes you the happiest person in the world. Which in turn makes you slowly freak out about your quickly approaching death because you would do anything to not leave this wonderful woman. 

----

December 25, 2018

“(Y/N), are you listening?” Lena questioned. You turn to look at Lena as she was currently driving back to her place from Kara’s. Lena and you have spent Christmas with the superfriends and Eliza, considering how you two don’t exactly have any family. Lena is looking at you expectedly with a raise in her eyebrow that clearly means ‘So, are you going to answer or not?’

“No, I’m sorry, babe. I zoned out what were you saying?” You apologized. You knew better to lie to the raven-haired girl next to you. She sighed exhaustly as she turned right and you gave her a confused look because this wasn’t the way to get to her apartment.

“Where are we going?” You asked.

“I’m dropping you off at your apartment.” Lena replied while keeping her eyes on the road.

“What? Why? I thought we agreed to spend Christmas together. I still haven’t given you your gift.” You questioned becoming more confused. You can tell Lena was mad, but you didn’t know for what reason. Yeah, sure, you zoned out while she was talking, but it’s not like you did it on purpose.

“Because, (Y/N), you obviously have more important things to attend to. I mean for the last month you have been acting strange. Canceling dates, ignoring my texts and calls, hell, you never zoned me out in the last 2 years we have known each other than you have the last month! I have tried to be patient with you and let you tell me what was wrong on your own terms. But, the more I wait the more distant you are becoming. So, I’m going to take you home since you clearly don’t want to be bothered with me.” Lena replied coldly and you just sat there staring at her with your mouth opened. You must admit you were acting distant towards Lena, but that had nothing to do with her and more to do with the fact that you have been spending almost all your free time at the DEO. 

Last month, you told Brainy and Alex about your death date. You told them about how you didn’t believe it at first, but then all the witch’s predictions started to come true. You told them how you were accepting of it until you met Lena and now all you want in life is to survive that day because you weren’t ready to let Lena go. So, you guys have been trying to find ways you can avoid your impending death. You guys have tried finding the witch to just discover that she died 2 years ago. Brainy tried to look at the Legion’s database and found nothing. Everyone found it strange that they couldn't find anything about you. It seemed like after May 21st, 2019 any trace of you disappeared. 

“Lena, it’s not like that, I promise. I do have a lot on my plate right now but it has nothing to do with you and I’m sorry for taking it out on you. I would like to make it up to you. So, when you drop me off I would hope that you come in too.” You apologized. Honestly you don’t know why you didn’t just come out and tell her the truth. You know that if Lena knew then she would do everything in her power to help. Hell, you knew that she might come up with a solution. But, what if she doesn’t then what? Keeping you alive would be Lena’s main goal. She would become obsessed with it. It would consume her whole existence; and when you finally do meet your demise, then Lena would blame herself. Thinking about how you died because she didn’t do enough or she wasn’t smart enough. No, you couldn’t put her through that. However, you know Lena enough to know that after you die and she finds out from Alex or Brainy that you knew this was coming and you said nothing, she would be upset. 

So, the next day after Lena's reluctant departure, you sat down and started on your parting gift for Lena.

---

May 20th, 2019

Today’s your last day. Today is your full day with Lena. You begged Lena months ago to take today off. You didn’t tell her why anyways she asked every time you begged, but you just kept telling her that you just want a day for just the two of you. So, now it is currently 5pm and you two are laying in Lena’s bed, exhausted from the day’s events. You made sure that Lena had a great time. You had Kara take you two to Rome and you spent the day wandering around and visiting all the tourist places and eating at the tourist restaurants. You knew Lena always wanted to go somewhere and be treated like a normal person and that’s how she was treated today. You looked over to Lena and found she was already staring at you with the look that she always gives you. The look with so much love and admiration like you’re the reason why the sun rises every morning. Usually this look would fill your heart with so much happiness that it feels like it would burst. However, today wasn’t the case. This time it made you burst into tears.

“Darling, what’s wrong?” Lena exclaims worryingly. She doesn't know why you are crying. You two had a fabulous day together. You went all out for her today and Lena fell even more in love today, even though she didn’t know that was possible. Now, you two were in her apartment enjoying the rest of the day and one look from her made you cry.

“It’s nothing babe. I’m just thinking about how beautiful you are and I’m happy that I can spend my life with you. I love you so much.” You confessed through the tears. It’s too late to tell her what the day truly meant for you. How does one tell the love of their life that this was their last day together? 

---

May 21st, 2019 8:15am

You woke up to a weight on your chest. You look down to find a pool of black hair spilled on your chest. You rarely get to wake up before Lena considering she likes to be up by the crack of dawn. However, when you do wake up before her, you tend to cherish the moment. You look down in awe. You spend the next couple of minutes outlining the lines on her face. You take note that Lena's mouth is slightly parted when she sleeps or how her skin tends to glow in the morning light. You even note the small puddle of drool that has collected on your chest below Lena’s mouth. Seeing that made you chuckle. You know that if you told Lena that she was drooling in her sleep again that she would adamantly deny that she drools and that the water on your chest obviously came from sweating. 

Unfortunately, not everything can last forever because you remembered what today’s day was. You remembered that it was the 21st of May. The day that would surely be your last on this Earth. Your last with the love of her life. Upon this realization, suddenly looking at Lena’s sleeping form didn’t bring happiness and love to you. Instead, all that welcomed you was desperation and heartbreak. You tried your hardest to figure out how to avoid this, but it seemed that every solution you, Brainy, and Alex came up with had a flaw in it. It seemed that it was impossible to escape fate. 

So, now you wonder what would happen to this sleeping form on you. Would she let today destroy her? Or would she come out on top stronger than ever? Would she be mad at you? Would she be mad at herself for not realizing sooner that something was off? Would she fall in love again? Jeez, you really do hope Lena could find love again in the future. You wanted her to be happy. You wanted her to move on and live her best life. To date, love, marry, and have a family. You wanted her to do everything you two talked about. It breaks your heart that it won’t be with you, but at least she would have those things.

“So, were you going to silently stare at me while I was sleeping or were you going to wake me up at some point, darling?” Lena groggily asked me while rubbing her eyes. You smile at her, forcing out the thoughts in your head, and replied back, “Depends. Were you going to stop drooling on me?” Lena paused her stretching and glared at you.

“I would like you to know that CEOs of multi-billion dollar companies do NOT drool in their sleep.” She strakly said back.

“Well, there must have been a drop in LCorp stocks because you definitely do.” You shot back and laughed. Lena hit you on the shoulder which made you laugh harder. 

“I don’t know why I put up with you.” She mumbled under her breath before she shot you one last glare before she got up and made her way to the bathroom.

“Maybe because you love me.”

“Yeah that gotta be the reason why.” Was the last thing you heard before Lena closed the bathroom door behind her. Yeah she’ll be okay after today. She has to be.

---

May 21st, 2019 11:30am

You and Lena have been lounging around her apartment all morning. You two are currently watching Lena’s favorite movie, Moana. You weren’t really paying attention, only singing the songs with Lena when they came on. You were too busy texting Alex. Alex is persistent on sending DEO agents or Kara over to protect you for the day. You refused because if she did that then Lena would obviously have questions and you would break down and tell her the truth. That would ultimately cause your last day together to be filled with tension. You didn’t want that. You wanted Lena to remember the last moments you spent together to be good ones.

You have decided to not let Alex’s worrying take up anymore of your time. So, you sat your phone on the table and finally sat back and gave your full attention to the tv to enjoy the movie. 

However, enjoyment didn’t last long because suddenly the tv went black cutting the movie short. When the tv cut back on it wasn’t the movie that greeted you and Lena. No, it was a man and woman with caramel skin. They had white hair, the man’s hair was short and carefully styled while the woman’s was braided into an intricate design. They also had pointed ears and blue dots painted on their skin in a pattern. They wore what looked like Victorian styled royal clothing. You stare at the pair on tv and the feeling of dread and familiarity was all that met you. You felt like the pair looked familiar, but you didn’t know from where. 

Your pondering was cut short when the pair finally spoke.

“Greetings to the inhibats of National City. We are the King and Queen of Azltan and we have come looking for one of our kind that has been hiding among you. If you know of the one named, (Y/N) of the (L/N), please bring her to us at the tallest building. We will give you till the yellow sun meets the ground, then we will deploy our soldiers to find her, and they will find her within any means necessary. We hope you do cooperate with us and let this interaction between our species be as peaceful as possible.” The Queen spoke.

You listened to the TV frozen in place, unaware of the world around you. You didn’t notice that Lena has gotten up and is now calling your name over and over. You didn’t notice Kara entering your apartment as Supergirl and had started formulating a plan with Lena. You didn’t even notice that Kara had picked you up and taken you and Lena to the DEO. You didn’t notice any of this. You were completely shocked at how today was unraveling. 

You didn’t snap out of your state of shock until your head snapped to the side and your cheek was suddenly hurting. You blinked a couple times and bought your head back up. You were met with Lena standing in front of you, breathing heavily with tears in her eyes. It then registered to you that she had slapped you.

“Did you just slap me!?” You exclaim bewildering.

“Yes I did! Everyone has been trying to get your attention for the last hour and have been completely ignored! We are trying to come up with a plan to keep you safe but it’s hard to do so when the person we are trying to protect is ignoring everyone!” Lena yelled back, blinking back tears.

“Well, I’m sorry, Lena if I’m not exactly presented right now. I did just find out that an alien race that I never even heard of has come to National City looking for me. Then, on top of that, they claim I’m one of them!” You shouted while standing up so fast that the chair you were sitting on hit the floor. You were in Lena’s face, breathing wildly and looking into her eyes. How dare Lena put this on you? This wasn’t your fault. It just wasn’t seemingly possible to save you. Today was the when and the how finally showed itself. 

You were ready to tell Lena off some more until you saw something in Lena’s eyes that you never seen directed towards you; fear. You step back and look behind Lena to all your friends and see the same look in their eyes. You sigh, close your eyes, and pinch the bridge of your nose.

“Look, Lena. I’m sorry. That wasn’t fair of me to take that out on you. None of this is your fault. But, I don’t want to put all of National CIty in risk because you guys want to hide me away. I suggest we invite the Queen and King to the DEO and see what they want with me.” You suggest suddenly feeling a strong urge to meet them.

All your friends protested this idea. Saying how bad of an idea that was because they knew nothing of these people.

“Which is why we invite them to the DEO. This is one of the safest places I can be in National City. There are armoured guards everywhere, Supergirl, and Lena’s wrath.” You joked hoping to lighten the mood.

“National City and I would be safe. Maybe, we can convince them to leave Earth in peace because this has to be a misunderstanding.” You say hoping that you can convince your friends to go along with your plan.

After about two minutes of silence, everyone eventually agreed that this was the best course of action in keeping you and National City safe.

--

May 21st, 2019 2:00pm

Brainy sent a message an hour ago to the Queen and King’s ship, telling them to come to the DEO to meet with you. As time passed by you felt increasingly eagered and scared of what was to come. Lena hasn’t left your side since your little outburst. You, of course, felt bad for yelling at her, but you just suddenly felt a strong desire to defend yourself against her claims. Sure, you understood Lena’s perspective. You knew that under her collected demeanor that Lena was stressing out about your wellbeing and the intention of these otherworldly visitors. Your guilt increased greatly when you remembered that Lena has no idea how this day was going to end for you. You put your arm around her and pull her into a tight hug.

“Hey, listen to me. Everything is going to be okay. You will be okay, stop worrying so much.” You whisper against the top of Lena’s head. You hoped that Lena didn’t catch on to the fact that you said that she was going to be okay and not that you two would be okay. You need her to look back at this moment and remember these words of affirmation. 

Lena hugs you back and opens her mouth to say something, but she was interrupted by a huge beam of light touching down in front of the huge opening that Supergirl usually uses as an entrance. When the beam of light dissipated, it revealed five figures. Three of the five you don’t recognize, but by their demeanor you can tell they had to be some type of guards. Behind the three figures you saw the same two people that you saw on your TV just a few hours before.

When you met eyes with the Queen’s identical ones, you were overcome by familiarity and something else. You didn’t know why, but for some reason you felt the need to close the distance between you and the King and Queen. So, you took a step forward. However, when you did two very distinct things happened at the same time. The first thing was that the Queen also stepped forward. The second thing was that Kara was in front of you and every DEO agent in the room had their weapons pointing at the five aliens. Which in turn made the three guards in front of the King and Queen jump into a defensive stance. 

The room stayed like this for a tense minute before the King cleared his throat. “Hello, My name is Stul of the Van Kol and this is my wife, Luzu of the Van Kol. We are the Queen and King of Azltan. We are not here to cause any harm, so it would be very appreciated if everyone would lower their weapons.” The King said with booming authority in his voice.

The DEO agents look around nervously unsure what to do. Nobody lowered their weapon until Alex gave the signal to. 

Anyways the weapons were lowered, the tension stayed.“You say that you guys aren’t here to cause any harm, yet, you went on TV to tell the whole city that we must give up one person by the end of the day if we didn’t want to be invaded.” Lena speaks up in her CEO voice. You knew that Lena didn’t buy a single word the King said and she had a great point not to. However, something told you that the King was telling the truth.

The King lets out a hearty laugh and says, “You have a great argument there, Miss. For that we are sorry, however, it was quite urgent that we found (Y/N) as soon as possible. Their safety heavily relied on it.”

The last sentence sparked everyone's interest. “My safety?” You question. You step out from behind Kara since you didn’t believe you needed to be protected from the aliens in front of you. 

“What does us meeting have to do with my safety?” You ask again. Obviously they knew something you didn’t and frankly you are getting fed up with today. 

“I believe it would be better if we discussed this somewhere with” The King stops talking and looks around the room before continuing, “less people.” He finishes with a strained smile. You can tell that he is trying to keep the peace, but he really isn’t happy with the predicament he is in.

“No. We will have this discussion right here, right now.” You state sternly. 

“Please, my child. It is really not safe for us to talk in the open.” The Queen pleads softly. 

“What do you mean, your child? You two are not my parents. My parents passed away years ago, and I’m not moving from this spot. You either hurry up and tell me why I’m in danger or you guys can leave and not come back.” You are getting increasingly frustrated as the minutes ticked by. This conversation wasn’t doing anything but giving you more questions than answers. 

You look between the King and Queen and notice how nervous they seem to be getting. The Queen is wringing her hands and looking around anxiously, while the King is developing a noticeable film of sweat on his forehead. 

“How am I in dang-” You slowly enunciate every word. However, before you can finish your sentence, you feel a very intense pain and next thing you know you were on the ground. 

Lena got to you first. At least you think she did. You don’t really know because all you can focus on is the boiling, hot pain that was radiating from your stomach. Your hands reached for where the pain was coming from. When you reached the area it was wet. Everywhere you touched was wet. Filled with confusion you bought your hands up to look at them. Your hands were completely red. That’s when you realized that you were bleeding a lot.

Lena grabs your shaky hands, “Hey. Hey, (Y/N), you've been shot, but you’re going to be okay. Okay? Just stay with us and you’ll be okay. Alex is about to apply pressure to your wound, okay?” Lena says with a shaky voice, tears unshed. You both knew that you were not going to be okay, but you nod your head anyways.

The moment Alex pressed her hands against the place where the bullet had entered you let out a blood curdling scream. 

“It’s okay, (Y/N). You’re doing great, just hang in there.” Alex coos softly. You can hear a twinge of dread in her voice. She knew that this was the moment that you guys have tried so hard to avoid. You also knew that anyways you were certain that there was one way this could end that Alex would try to save you until your last breath.

Everything was starting to get more fuzzy. The pain was fading into nothingness and you felt a heaviness settle behind your eyelids. You look up at Lena for the last time. You wanted to remember everything about Lena. You wanted to remember how green her eyes are or how her nose crinkle when you tell a really bad joke or how anyways she’s not afraid of any man, yet, she still begs you to kill the bugs in the apartment. You wanted to remember everything about this goddess above you.

You put one of your hands up to her cheek, vaguely remembering there is blood on them. You use the last of your strength to smile up at her and say, “You are going to be okay, Lena. Just know that I love you.”

[taejeonie]

taehee in america!!

— i can’t find a gif from one of their interviews :// also the events aren’t in sequence,,whatever i remember watching will appear here so if i missed something, u guys can tell me!!

okay so taehee’s like

different

like most of the tweets were ‘american air changed taehee’

like in korea she’s chill, semi-shy but still chaotic

but in america it’s that but x82848, minus the shy part it’s like gone now

and she’s more interactive with czennies so that’s probably why (*^_^*)

like in one of their interviews someone asked, “okay, so i have a question from tumblr...do you know tumblr”

“yes i know tumblr ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)”

and she loved doing rpd with them it’s so cute

she kept hyping them up and dancing in the sidelines

but when cherry bomb comes on

she was like: this is my song. must. dance.

and she was center for the nananananana part so it was p e r f e c t

when they did flinch she was paired with doyoung

james was trying to talk to them but they were mODELLING

let them do their work james

“oh i see how it is now”

her eyes flinched a bit when the fruit came out but they didn’t notice....hopefully

anyways youngtae won

speaking of interviews

awkward faces. disgusted faces. bored faces. fake smile faces.

‘oh shit did they just say that?’ faces.

“so how’s it like being the only girl in the group?”

in her head she’s like: stfu i didn’t go to america for this ಠ╭╮ಠ

but outside she’s like: hahahaha looks like i gotta answer this ∩^ω^∩ gotta pay rent u know?

the genius interview oh god markhee was a MESS

they kept pinching each other when they had to explain the s t e a m y parts of the song so johnny did it for them

in the end they just gave up on explaining so she said “you don’t have to take the lyrics word by word, line by line. you can take it however you want and the feelings aren’t just limited to a significant other. it’s just love between two people and that could be a friend, a partner-“

inside they’re like “good job, taehee. good job,” until she says

“-your mom.”

and when they were teaching cherry bomb she couldn’t keep her mouth shut

“okay so you spread your legs like this” - johnny

“that’s when you feel the air coming in” - mark

and when doyoung thought it couldn’t get any worse

“oh, really? i don’t” - taehee

and yuta, taeyong, johnny, and mark just try to hold their laughter

doyoung @ the rest: just smile and wave boys, smile and wave

also stayzens got crumbs of (han) jisung and taehee’s friendship when they were guessing the dance based on the silhouette

when the choreo for ‘get cool’ showed she immediately answered

“oH OH GET COOL STRAY KIDS”

she scared everyone with her excitement but that’s okay bc they got a point

“that was fast,” the host told her

*proudly* “yeah i’m friends with one of them”

taehee stans were served

she wore dresses to award shows bUT THERE WAS A TIME SHE WORE A SUIT

everyone died

she looked amazing hot spectacular show stopping

#miamiwithtaehee

“hey guys! welcome back to my channel ( ◠‿◠ ) so today we would be going toOoOoOo miAMIIIII *fake sound effects* um so like we’re going to buy some stuff for the beach coz like it’s really hot hahahaha but that’s because i’m here *slowly pulls shades down*”

“why do you talk like that”

“just let me be, mark. let me be.”

but she went back to taehee mode so it’s aight

“taeyong oppa broke his slippers and the sand’s really hot so i don’t know how he survives.”

“noona~”

“hAECHAN I DONT WANNA GET WEEEET”

she gets caught anyways

and hyuck drags her to the deep deep deep part

but she knows how to swim :>>

#athletic

she came back to shore to dry off,,,so she watched the surfers with jungwoo while the others are having fun

“waahh, that’s so cool. did you see that?”

“my dad taught me how to surf back in australia”

“really? :OO”

“yeah but that was when i was still younger. i think i forgot now.”

“woah” jungwoo’s amazed by this girl

OH MY GOD WAIT I FORGOT ABOUT 19 EMOTIONS

so when she was asked to do flirty

she got shy, that was the shyest moment of her life but you gotta do what you gotta do

*starts twirling a piece of hair on her finger* “hey,,,,” *winks*

then she starts playing with her hair more aggressively until she had to stop and fix her hair bc the manager told her to

producer: is that how you flirt?

taehee: i don’t flirt. *confidently* people flirt with me ;))).

johnny, off-screen: excuses! this is why we don’t let her out

her and johnny just kept giving commentary on poor mark it’s hilarious

*mark raises his eyebrow*

“you’re so flirty”

“damn, that eyebrow tho. i’m swayed.”

taehee kept eating ice cream

like everytime the camera pans to her she’s just eating ice cream

when they watched alicia key performing ‘if i ain’t got you’

she was star struck

markhee: Aw sHIT

when she rapped “knet knet talk talk” she blew up the whole bird app

she was feeling herself everytime they performed it was sexc

american air really is different

concerts omg don’t get me started

johnny started shaking his booty as a joke but then there’s taehee on the side of the stage lowkey twerking

you know how bp were feeling themselves during their cons?

well taehee is just like that and czennies wERE SO LOUD

her ‘baby don’t like it’ fit .....

it was different from the boys’ since she’s wearing like a dress like damn what if she sLIPPED

she was wearing a blindfold too

her performance is still flawless tho i mean it’s taehee come on

and when they performed ‘superhuman’

istg that markhee part everyone flipped

they were so close (ノಠ益ಠ)ノ彡

like i swear they could feel their breaths on each other’s faces

but it’s what the czennies want and you gotta give it to them even if the management said nO

#rebel

markhee stans were fed this season they kept hanging out with each other

they rode that horse carriage thing together

they ate donuts together

they shopped together

they messed up their korean and english at some point together

best friend goals

taehee was so excited for the dodgers game she was so adorable in the jersey

she was more than glad to be the first pitch and list off the names of the players to the members

jungwoo and hyuck trapped her so they could get on kiss cam

she was struggling

but that’s okay bc she still gets to see the dodgers play

brooklyn boys

the title’s still boys the producers are like whatever just name it brooklyn boys

after they ate they went shopping right

taehee was in the ‘don’t forget your tools’ team

taeyong mom johnny dad jungwoo child mark child taehee child

“i wanted to be the cousin!!”

“.....taehee child”

#markheebesties we love it

markhee separated from the group for a while to buy ingredients to make cocktails for the older members + staff

“you know how?”

“yeah, my dad taught me.”

“your dad is so cool.”

“i know right- *immediately* mom, i still love youuu <3333”

“we’re both minors and we’re the ones getting alcohol”

“mark, we’re in america. we’re not minors anymore.”

but later on they don’t drink alcohol to respect their korean culture :>>

when jungwoo wanted to get the pie thingy and taeyong won’t let him it was comical

mark’s like that youngest good kid

jungwoo’s like the middle kid who wanted to bUY SOMETHING BUT THEY WONT LET HIM

and taehee’s the eldest bad influence kid

*whispering* “just hide it. yeah, hide it in there. then just put it out when they’re paying for it*

mark’s just laughing off cam they were so serious

anyways they’re cooking and taehee made the guac :p

she kept on laughing at markwoo it’s cute

but she kept on eating the other group’s pasta

“hey! why do you keep eating our food?”

“diversity.”

they complimented her on her guac since she doesn’t cook that much

but she’s a great cook she learned from taeyong!!! and her dad

when they were playing beer pong the maknae line was sOOO HYPED

“LIKE A WHAT?” “LIKE A LIGHT”

“LIKE A WHAT” “LIKE A LIGHT”

and hyuck’s just looking at them weirdly like wtf hahaha markhee tingz i guess

she acted like a ring girl every time they switch to the next round

“wAIT LET ME WALK” *catwalks from side a to side b*

while they were karaoke-ing she made the cocktails and mark watched her

she kept doing tricks with the cups to make mark laugh

she let the staff taste it and they were amazed she’s such an angel i swear

“this one’s for you!!!!”

“is it good?”

“oh i should add more of this? okay, hold on”

and then the older hyungs came and were amazed

doyoung doesn’t even drink but she managed to get him to have a taste

when they were all going to sleep, she chose the bed at the very end

she used mark’s arm as a pillow

they all kinda...didn’t shower...

jk they still smell great ig

“mark you stink”

“shut up”

and then they fell asleep but the others caught them

“mark and taehee are asleep”

“really?” *laughs*

“i’m not asleep i’m just closing my eyes”

“okay but taehee’s already snoring”

*sleepily* “i DONT SNORE!!!”

[yunatheintrovert]

that one time in Kandahar | Bell/Belikov Soviet-Afghan War AU one-shot

You sighed, staring down at the many empty shot glasses of vodka in front of you. His presence against you was a comforting, familiar one as you leaned against him with your legs touching his. Your vision blurred ever so often under the flickering lamps hanging over the bar. 

The flames erupting from one shot of vodka set alight by the enthusiastic Afghan bartender blurred into the scorching flames greedily consuming the wreckage of the armored APC downed by the dushmani. 

That was one you and your unit hadn’t been able to save. 

And then there was the news when you got back.

Another Mi-24 gunship on a convoy escort mission had been shot down over the Hindu Kush mountains, a region your unit would soon be moved to patrol over. The crew of the crashed gunship hadn’t survived. The pilot opted to pull the pin of his one grenade over the possibility of capture. 

You couldn’t blame him.

Blinking away the orange blurs in your vision, you sighed once more. Routine missions like that could easily go so wrong. All it took was one lucky shot by the dushmani with their accursed Stingers the Americans handed out like candy-

Resting your head against his shoulder, you glanced up at your companion. 

 If it came down to it, you preferred to go out in the initial fiery impact of the crash. Still, that was selfish...

“Please don’t die,” you murmured before leaning closer-

Warm chapped lips brushed against your own with the familiar scent of vodka and aviation kerosene greeting you like an old friend-

You blinked, staring up into those gunmetal blue eyes. 

Like an old friend, the words echoed in your mind.

You vaguely heard the sound of breath hitching in surprise. 

The vodka, you distantly thought while you pulled away from him, was really helpful.

Even in the cool Afghan air of Kandahar, your cheeks heated as did your lips oddly enough. 

It was the vodka. 

Before you could stumble over an apology, Dimitri abruptly pulled away from you, suddenly calling out for another round of vodka. You stared at the tan fabric of his Afghanka winter coat as his back faced you.

You only meant to give him a kiss on the cheek.

...And was the kiss really that bad for him?

“Sorry, Mitya,” you murmured before looking back down at your shot glass dejectedly-

“ДА!” Charkov suddenly exclaimed beside you, shaking his fist in the air, “You hear that, Gusev? I won the bet! I told you it would happen before Kabul. You owe me seven packs of Marlboros, my friend-”

“Nyet, nyet!” Gusev vehemently denied, leaning forward against the wooden counter of the bar. He slammed his shot glass down, “It was one-sided. It does not count!” 

You dazedly glanced between the two, only registering the word “one-sided” with a wince. Dejectedly, you looked down once more. You didn’t mean to ruin the night for Mitya and yourself…

“Comrade,” Charkov suddenly said lowly, grasping the Mi-24 gunner’s shoulder as he leaned closer with a smile befitting that of a zampolit, “We made no such rule.”

Gusev gulped before nervously laughing, “But you know my friend...There are other fish in the sea for young Bell there. Like that Spetsnaz captain-” 

You didn’t know what exactly happened right then and there. One moment, Gusev was looking up at Charkov with a placating smile, the next, his face suddenly paled as Charkov stared down at him.

You blinked.

Before you could ask if the caviar went down wrong for Gusev, he hastily looked away, laughing once more. 

“Ah, b-but you know, perhaps I was mistaken. Sometimes, couples are just fated to be with one another-” 

________________________________________________________________

The exposed gray ventilation above you on the safehouse’s ceiling came into focus as you stared up at it. Rain pelted the roof above you in a distinct pitter-patter, yet you could still register the cheery sounds of drunken soldiers talking amongst themselves and that one enthusiastic soldier exclaiming about him winning those Marlboros. 

You blinked, dazedly brushing fingers over your warm lips. 

The smell of vodka, aviation kerosene, and Afghan dust still lingered in the air like an old friend. 

What a vivid dream, you thought sleepily. And an odd one at that. 

Along with other soldiers, Belikov was in it and you had-

You had kissed him. 

Kicking away the thread-bare sheets at your feet, you sighed and rubbed the back of your suddenly warm neck. 

Someone must have turned up the thermostat.

It really was an odd dream. 

Shaking your head, you laid back down onto the sheets only to find yourself staring up restlessly at the ceiling moments later. Hollowness ironically filled your chest in a vague sense of loss- no longing. Distantly, you brought a hand up to your aching chest right where your heart was and grasped the fabric of your shirt there. 

Why, you thought slowly, do I mourn a dream. 

There really was no point.

Dreams weren’t even real. 

Yet you never did get any more sleep that night. 

________________________________________________________________

You leaned your head against your hand, staring longingly at the pot of coffee brewing at the corner. The familiar sound of the boiling dark brew already woke up slightly. 

Usually, Sims or Lazar would make the coffee in the morning. But you hadn’t gotten any sleep and woke up at 0400 hours to make coffee. 

Now that you thought of it, ever since you came to the safehouse with Adler, you had been rather sleepy... But this was different. Just a restless night that came with an oddly vivid dream, you asserted. 

Yawning, you perked up at the sound of footsteps behind you. 

“...Good morning,” you said sleepily. 

“Доброе утро, my friend,” an all too familiar accented voice greeted in turn. You blinked, jolting awake ever so slightly at the sound of his voice. 

Quickly, you went back to staring at the brewing coffee pot by the corner and gestured to it with one hand, “I, uh, made some coffee.” you said rather lamely. Words seemed to fail you in the early unholy hours of 0400. 

You heard Belikov take a seat beside you. Hearing the timer beep and the boiling come to a low, you perked up and walked over to the coffee pot. You glanced back at your companion questioningly. You heard coffee wasn’t generally consumed in the Soviet Union…

Belikov nodded with a smile. 

You awkwardly smiled back and grabbed the paper cups in the corner, pouring you both a cup of the dark brew. Hopefully, he was okay with drinking coffee black. The safehouse ran out of sugar and cream yesterday and Lazar was up for grocery runs…

Setting back into your seat with coffee in hand, you sighed, enjoying the familiar aroma of caffeine. A silence settled in the air as the rain pelted the windows outside. There was a storm system rolling through the Berlin metropolitan area according to the weather forecast...

“Did you sleep alright?” the Russian suddenly asked, his voice filled with friendly concern. You bit your lip guiltily. Belikov was always so friendly and nice, asking about your wellbeing. Only Lazar ever really did that before. And to think you had that weird dream about Belikov when he was this considerate…

“I-I’m fine,” you asserted, “I just had this weird dream-”

Deep down, you knew better than to start explaining that dream to him. But if you left that brief kiss part out, maybe it’d be cathartic and you could move on from it. 

Like giving a confession, you thought sleepily. 

4am thoughts really were the best. 

“-where we were both getting drunk in this bar in Kandahar. And there were soldiers around us drinking vodka as well. And one soldier kept on exclaiming about him winning packs of Marlboros for some reason…” you rambled on, feeling the guilty weight off your chest lessen. 

Suddenly, you heard Belikov choke on his coffee. 

“Are you okay, Mitya?!”

You worriedly patted his back, hearing him cough even more. After a few tense moments of coughing, he settled down. You opened your mouth to ask if he was alright, only to be interrupted when gunmetal blue eyes suddenly stared at you with an unfamiliar intensity.

“Ты помнишь? Это я, Митя.”

________________________________________________________________

Author’s Note: I debated on whether or not to post this since this is probably a rather confusing AU to read. 

Basically, this is an AU in which Bell and Belikov serve together as Mi-24D pilots in the same helicopter assault unit during the Soviet-Afghan War. The overall timeline of cod cold war is shifted more than several years since the Soviet-Afghan War really started happening in the 1980s. Also, I'm leaving things vague but things happened in between Bell and Belikov's service in Afghanistan and the events of the campaign that made Bell have amnesia. So Bell doesn't remember her close past with Belikov. 

On a side note...this is why I don't write kiss scenes. I'm horrible with writing them XD. Although to be fair, this was kinda meant to not be really romantic cause Bell's drunk haha. 

Well, I hope this was tolerable to read. Thanks for reading!

[jaxsteamblog]

Celestial

Click here to read the full fic on AO3

There usually weren't any physical downsides to Katara’s connection with La. In the ocean and under the full moon, she almost felt invincible and was at her peak. During the new moon, when there was less of a pull from the sky, she was sluggish. But even then, she just napped more than normal.

A total lunar eclipse was an entirely different beast.

The palace was on high alert for the days leading up to the eclipse. La must have felt it coming, because their connection was charged with anxiety. And spiritual anxiety was more than Katara thought she could deal with. It made her feel like her brain was buzzing with a thousand kilowatts of electricity, while her body had been filled with rock.

It hurt to move, to breathe, or even to think.

Zuko, visibly shoving off clerks in his video chat, was rushing to her.

“You don’t need to come. Sokka and my dad are already here.” Katara groaned from underneath her heap of furs and blankets.

“I will be damned before I let anyone else take care of you during this time.” Zuko snapped. “Don’t you know this is when you’re the most vulnerable?”

“Yeah, announce it to the whole world!” Katara snapped back and Zuko frowned at her.

“You are the most important person in my life. There is no way I’m going to be anywhere else in the world than beside you.” He said.

Katara shut her mouth and watched as Zuko pushed into a room. She recognized his bedroom and stayed silent as he yanked open his closet.

“When will you be here?” Katara asked quietly. Zuko stopped and cradled the phone in his hands, looking at her with more tenderness than she had seen before.

“I’ll be there as soon as I can. I love you.” He said.

“I love you.” She replied. “Hurry.”

As Katara found out later, Zuko left his driver at the airport to pick up his luggage while he took the car to the palace. He wasn’t the type to leave anybody behind and it surprised Katara when Sokka told her.

What also surprised her was that the staff, already tense, was suspicious of the Fire Lord bursting into the North Pole when their ruler was at her weakest.

There was a lot of yelling from the hall and Katara struggled out from under her warm heap. Shuffling to the door, she wrapped a blanket around herself and opened it. Zuko was yelling with no less than two servants and three armed guards.

“Zuko.” Katara called weakly. Zuko’s head snapped around and he shoved his way through.

“Beloved, what are you doing up?” He asked. Before she could reply, Zuko swept her up and stepped into her room, using a foot to shut her door behind them.

Placing her back in bed, she watched as he stood up and started to unbutton his shirt. Feeling shy, she buried her face in her blanket, keeping her eyes just above the edge of it.

Zuko raised his eyebrow, keeping his face straight.

“What’s all this?” He asked casually.

“You’ve never undressed like this before.” She said.

“Like what?” He asked and discarded his dress shirt. His undershirt was just a plain white t-shirt but it reminded her of early mornings.

“Just so, familiar.” She said and tightened her grip on the blanket as he undid his belt.

“We’re going to be married. You’re going to see this a lot.” He said.

“Who said I have to get used to it?” She asked.

“Fair.”

Katara stayed quiet as his pants fell to the floor and only moved over as Zuko climbed into bed with her. He pulled blankets and furs over them both and then untucked her from her blanket shield.

“So what symptoms should we expect?” He questioned.

“I haven’t gotten caught in a total eclipse before, but I’m assuming it’s going to be like the partials, just worse.” Katara answered.

“Why didn’t you leave for this one?” Zuko asked.

“And leave my people? They’re just as defenseless as I am. More if I leave.” Katara shook her head and wrapped her legs between his. “The walls are thick, but they’ve been breached before.”

“How long do you stay like this?”

“I guess I’ll just get worse until the actual event. And then the eclipse lasts for about three hours, so I should start to feel better after it passes.”

“So you’re going to be miserable for the whole day?”

“The eclipse isn’t until Wednesday Zuko.” Katara stated.

“That’s in two days! Are you going to die?” Zuko sounded terrified but Katara laughed.

“Waterbenders have survived every lunar eclipse since the beginning of time.” She replied.

“None of them were bound to the ocean spirit.” Zuko retorted.

“Aren’t you supposed to be making me feel better?” Katara grumbled.

Zuko smoothed her hair back and kissed her forehead. “You’re right. I’m sorry.”

For the next two days, Zuko became her guard dog. He answered the door every time, taking messages and meals. Only Sokka and Hakoda were permitted access, though Katara could see the strain in Zuko’s eyes as he had to stand back. Still, he did everything. On Wednesday, Katara lost all physical strength. He bathed her, getting into the basin with her and combing out her hair. With muted videos playing, Zuko learned to braid and pulled back her hair.

Her meals were simple and he helped her sit up before feeding her. She couldn’t take in much, but he was patient and slow, coaxing her to eat more.

When the eclipse happened, Katara let out a gasp. It scared Zuko and he jumped on her, making sure she was still breathing. She was, but they were shallow breaths that shuddered in her throat.

“My bending is gone.” She said, weeping. Zuko held her and rocked her, running his hand up and down her arm.

“It’ll come back. It’s temporary.” He murmured into her ear.

“Oh spirits, it hurts.” She cried. There was no pain, but the ache consumed her from the inside. Katara had nothing, was nothing. All that she was had disappeared.

“It’ll come back. I promise.”

“Zuko it’s gone. It’s gone.” Katara clung to him, sobbing, and feeling the blank space inside of her. It was a smooth piece of glass; it held nothing and nothing could fill it.

Zuko held her and rocked her for three agonizing hours.

When the eclipse was done and the shadow started to leave the face of the moon, Katara sighed in relief. While she and her bending both were weak, at least it was back. It was so calming, in fact, that Katara promptly fell asleep.

Waking up, she knew the eclipse was completely over. She stretched under the blankets and her hands went searching over the mattress.

No Zuko.

Curious, Katara got up, feeling wobbly from the lack of food, and walked through her room. Her door was open just a crack and she slowly opened it just enough to peer out into the hall. Surprisingly, she found Zuko and Sokka sitting together on the floor. Zuko had his hands in his hair while Sokka leaned in, his hand on Zuko’s back.

“I mean, I’ve gone through a solar eclipse, I know what it feels like. But Sokka,” Zuko’s voice wavered and Katara put her hand to her mouth. “I thought she was going to die.”

“We all kinda did.” Sokka admitted. “When she and I were running, it was.” Her brother’s voice choked off and Katara pressed her back to the wall, unable to look at them.

“It was like she got really sick. Everything left her. She was able to move, and she still kind of had her bending, but she’d pass out if she used it. We started to shelter when they happened, if we couldn’t get out of the area, but each time I was terrified we’d be found and they’d get us. And those were partial eclipses.” Sokka finally explained.

“I can’t lose her.” Zuko said.

“I know man, I know.” Sokka laughed in dark acceptance. “But you probably shouldn’t have punched my dad.”

“I wasn’t leaving her side.” Zuko said darkly.

“Woah buddy, I understand! I’m just saying, he’s not going to be happy about it.” Sokka said.

Taking in a steadying breath, Katara pushed open her door and walked into the hall. Sokka and Zuko scrambled to their feet.

“Are you okay?” Zuko asked.

Katara smiled and nodded, watching both he and Sokka relax.

“It’s over.” She said and held out a hand. “I’m back to normal.” With a flick of her wrist, ice pulled from the wall and into her hand. Melting it, Katara took a drink.

“Dad wants to see you.” Sokka said.

“I guess I have to heal him, huh?” Katara asked, eyeing Zuko.

“I’m not apologizing for punching him, but I am sorry it came to that.” He was terse and Katara wondered what sort of scuffle had occurred while she was sleeping.

“I’m sure Malina found him a healer.” Sokka interjected. “He just wants to make sure you’re alright.”

“Okay. But can you go get him? I want to go back to bed.” Katara said.

“Of course.” Sokka nodded. Zuko took her hand and she led him back into the bedroom. Katara waved at her brother and then shut the door.

“How are you feeling?” Zuko asked gently.

“Better. Thank you.”

“I was so scared.”

“So was I.”

“When is the next one?”

“About two years.”

“So soon?”

“They’re easier to achieve than solar eclipses.”

Zuko let out a breath and pressed his forehead against hers.

“Can we please not be here when it happens?” He asked.

“Oh come on. Now we know what to expect. It’ll be easier next time.” Katara said jokingly. Zuko took her other hand and squeezed both.

“Katara, this really scared me. I think your people would like it better if you were safe and healthy and maybe on a nice warm beach for the next eclipse.” He said.

Seeing the fear in his eyes and hearing the exhaustion in his voice, Katara sighed.

“Okay. I’ll talk to Arnook about it.” She said.

“Thank you.” Zuko wrapped his arms around her and hugged her tightly.

“I love you so much.” He said, kissing her hair.

“I love you.” Katara replied and nestled her head against his shoulder. “Too bad my dad is definitely going to kill you.”

“Let him try.” Zuko grumbled and squeezed her tighter. “You’re mine now.”

“Zuko!” Katara squealed. “That’s too tight!”

“Too bad. I’m never letting you go.” Zuko said and held her fast as she started to wriggle in his grasp. They both started to laugh, loudly and almost crazed. Katara could feel her anxiety dissipate and she knew it was the same for him.

Maybe a beach next time wouldn’t be so bad. Or maybe a swamp.

She could probably get away with a swamp.

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[dato-potato]

The Lost Son pt. 2

Who’s ready for part two?! I am absolutely floored at the reaction from the first part, I was not expecting that. Anyway, this is part two, hope you guys enjoy it as much as the first. Be warned, this is not the end.

Part One

Part Three

Part Four

Part Five

Part Six

Part Seven

Part Eight

——————————

Janet adjusted the bowtie around Damian’s neck, “Janet,” he choked, “You’re killing me.”

“Oh, hush, it’s not that bad,” she swatted his arm as she made some final adjustments, “You look absolutely charming!” she gushed as she stepped back.

“Wow, Dami! You look so fancy!” the now six-year-old Aurora squealed.

Damian ruffled her hair and smiled, “Thanks, Rory. Too bad you can’t come with me.”

Aurora pouted, “Yeah, why’d they only invite you?”

“Because I’m smarter and prettier,” Damian said matter-of-factly with a shrug of his shoulders.

Janet swatted his arm again and turned to Aurora, “They invited Damian because of his stupid brain,” she told her.

Aurora nodded, “’Cause of his stupid brain,” she repeated.

Damian scoffed, “I’ll have you know, my brain is very smart. I have three degrees, and--”

Janet rolled her eyes at him and Aurora giggled, “Yes, you’re unemployed at the tender age of twelve, how impressive. Off with you now, no doubt your ride’ll be here any second.”

Damian nodded and huffed out a breath before heading out the door where a limousine was waiting.

The event was being held in Gotham Academy, courtesy of Gotham’s resident big shot, Bruce Wayne. A bunch of smart people were invited, including some of Damian’s previous professors, but Damian himself was hardly interested. It wasn’t until Janet threatened to kick him out of the home that he accepted the invitation.

When he arrived, reporters were already swarming and Damian immediately regretted his decision. He could survive on the streets. Perhaps he could still turn back? Once some of the professors noticed him, he was crowded by them all, questions and theories being thrown about.

After Damian had finally managed to escape the gaggle of people, he stayed on the sidelines of the party, simply waiting until enough time had passed so he was able to leave without drawing too much attention.

Damian observed the other people at the party, his attention being drawn to the large form of Bruce Wayne. Damian had heard a lot about Wayne, but that was his first time seeing him in person and he had to say, he couldn’t see what all the fuss was about. Every move he made seemed so forced and faked, he didn’t understand how no one else saw it. There were two young men who lingered close to the billionaire who Damian assumed must be the two, living, adopted sons. One of them, the younger one was looking around the room until his eyes met Damian’s and the boy smiled before heading over to him.

Damian sighed and readied himself as the boy came within greeting distance, “Hi there, Damian Alistair,” he introduced himself.

The other boy met Damian’s hand halfway, “Timothy Drake-Wayne,” he told him. Damian froze, “These things can get so boring, huh? Especially when there’s no one your age,” the other boy chuckled.

Damian turned his face to him, “Yeah, I suppose so,” he answered, still in a daze. Was this kid serious? Damian knew he seemed kinda familiar but he had assumed it was because the Wayne’s were always in the papers and on TV so of course, this kid would seem familiar, but no. Timothy Drake-Wayne also happened to be Robin. Could he have not at least attempted to alter his voice? Damian shook his head as he looked to the other two Wayne members present with the sinking realization.

Bruce Wayne is Batman. You have got to be joking. Damian took a deep breath. He had never made any type of effort to try and discover the true identity of Batman and friends because it didn’t matter to him a whole lot, but they had made it so completely obvious to anyone with half a brain. The only thing they could’ve done more would be to simply announce it.

“You ok?” Timothy asked Damian after he hadn’t responded for a while.

Damian nodded finally, “Yeah, just absorbing some new information.”

“It can definitely get a bit much at these things,” Timothy agreed and chuckled again.

——————————

“Pleeeeeeeeease?” Aurora begged Damian one late summer afternoon.

Damian sighed dramatically, “Why?”

Aurora looked at him with the most pitiful eyes she could manage, “Just ‘cause?”

Damian rolled his eyes and stared at her for a long moment.

“Fine,” he caved and Aurora danced around the room, “Aren’t you getting a little old for this though, Rory?”

Aurora gasped and held a hand to her chest, offended, “I’m seven, I’m still a kid.”

“Right, until you want to stay up past bedtime, and then you’re not a child, right?”

Aurora nodded her head, “Exactly!”

Damian huffed and made his way downstairs to the kitchen, “Janet, Rory’s dragging me out for ice cream,” he called into the room.

Janet stood by the counter stirring a bowl, “Alright, her treat?” she smirked and raised an eyebrow.

Damian chuckled, “Better be.”

They made it to the ice cream parlour and Aurora dragged him into one store and then the next. Before either of them realized, the sun had begun to set and Damian didn’t want to risk having Aurora out that late.

“Let’s head back now, ok?” Damian said, gently tugging on Aurora’s hand.

“No, please? We rarely get to go out to play,” she whined.

Damian shook his head, “Sorry, little one. Can’t have you staying out too late.”

Aurora sighed but nodded her head.

“We’ll come back another day. We can even bring Janet and the other kids, how's that sou--”

Before Damian could finish consoling the small child, she was ripped from his hand. Aurora was snatched from his grasp, two larger men with most of their faces obscured, carrying her off.

Damian lunged to grab Aurora who was reaching and probably screaming for Damian, but he couldn’t hear anything. Just ringing in his ears.

Someone threw a punch to Damian’s head, knocking him off balance. He had gotten a bit rusty, but now was not the time for this. He had to get to Aurora.

Damian fought off the guys who came at him, losing count of how many there were. Something cold and heavy came down on his head and then he was lying face down on the ground. Heavy footsteps retreated and the fading screams from Aurora were the last things he heard before everything went black.

——————————

A mumbled voice, deep and gravelly and authoritative.

“--a mild concussion, but he should be fine. He seems to have a lot of old trauma and wounds,” the voice continued. Damian made no move to get up, allowing whoever was there to believe he was still unconscious. When he felt his strength returning to him, he swung his arm out. Whoever had been by his side, examining him, was no longer there.

“Calm down, boy.” the voice commanded.

Damian’s eyes adjusted to the darkness, though everything was a bit blurry, most likely due to the mild concussion.

In front of him stood the fabled Batman, Robin and Nightwing at his side.

Robin bent down to calm Damian, “Hey, Damian, it’s cool. It’s me, Robin.”

Damian jumped up to his feet and surveyed his surroundings, he had been dragged to an alley but he wasn’t too far from where he was with Aurora.

“Damian, talk to me, what’s wrong? Why were you so beat up? What happened?” Robin bombarded him with questions as he placed a hand on Damian’s shoulder. Much like their first meeting, Damian hauled the older boy over his head and slammed him to the ground.

The next moment, Batman was restraining Damian while Nightwing helped Robin catch his breath and off the ground.

“Release me!” Demian hissed, struggling in the Bat’s grip.

“Calm down,” the Bat growled behind him.

Damian kicked his leg back into Batman’s shin. The Bat grunted and his hold on Damian loosened, if only slightly, but it was enough for him to break free.

As Damian took off down the alley, the Bat and friends calling after him, his phone in his pocket reminded him.

Damian flipped the phone open to answer, “Hello?”

Janet had insisted when he had started school at the Academy that he had a cell phone for emergency purposes and Damian was adamant that he didn’t need anything fancy, a phone that could make and receive calls was more than enough, so he ended up with an old flip phone.

“Oh, thank goodness, Damian, where are you?” Janet’s voice was thick with panic as she spoke.

Damian thought for a moment, “Janet.”

“Damian, what’s wrong?”

“Someone took Aurora.”

The line was silent for a long moment, he wasn’t sure she was still there.

“You get her back.”

Damian nodded, though Janet couldn’t see him, and hung up. With that, it was clear she knew of his activities, and he’d surely have some explaining to do later.

He turned back to the vigilantes who were still on guard. Damian took a step toward Robin, sending a glare to Nightwing who stuck an arm out to stop Damian.

“Someone took Aurora,” he told Robin mostly.

Robin moved Nightwing’s arm away, “Who’s Aurora?”

Damian sighed, “My little sister, but that’s not important. What is important, is that someone kidnapped a child off the streets,” he looked pointedly at each vigilante, “Now, are you going to step up, or am I doing this alone?”

That seemed to stun the others. Robin was the first to move toward Damian, “We’ll get her back.”

Batman spoke with Nightwing in hushed voices as they seemed to be receiving information from earpieces they undoubtedly had on. Damian eyed them suspiciously as Robin attempted to speak to him in a calming voice as if he wasn’t already perfectly composed, courtesy of his training in the League.

“Don’t worry, Damian, we’ll get her back. You head home and we’ll--”

Damian’s head whipped in Robin’s direction as he stepped threateningly toward the boy, “I am not going anywhere, but getting my little sister back.”

At this point, Batman and Nightwing had stopped talking and were watching in case Damian attacked Robin, “Damian, I know that you have--”

Damian took another step towards the older boy who took a step back, “You have no idea what I can do,” he told Robin in a low voice. He looked to the other two vigilantes, “I will be coming with you, whether you like it or not.”

Nightwing sighed and shook his head while Batman simply stared.

“Fine,” The man conceded, “But you do exactly as I tell you.”

Damian scoffed, “You are not my father.”

Batman moved towards the young boy when Robin stepped in between them, “Spoiler said there’s suspicious movement in a warehouse by the docks, a kid was spotted with some of the goons.”

“Let’s head there then,” Batman nodded and started toward the back of the alley.

“You got a vehicle?” Damian called from the other end.

“Oh, you’re gonna love this,” Robin chuckled as headlights lit up the alleyway and the roar of an engine echoed off the buildings.

After the boys were seated and strapped in, the Batmobile sped off through the streets of Gotham.

Damian had a firm grip on the straps, he didn’t like the flashbacks he was getting from the masks and the general air in the vehicle. He couldn’t help his thoughts from wandering to his time with his mother and the League of Shadows and he did not appreciate those memories. He didn’t realize how glad he was that he wouldn’t have to go back there and be forced to do things he never even knew were wrong.

“Damian, you ok?” Robin asked from the seat next to him.

Damian realized how he must have looked, sweating buckets and white-knuckled as he clenched the straps.

“Yeah,” he managed, “Just car sick.”

“Right,” Robin nodded, clearly not convinced, but Damian had other things to focus on rather than convincing this boy that being in moving vehicles made him sick.

After what felt like hours, they made it to the docks and got out of the Batmobile.

Damian had to admit, he felt more than a little naked, going in without any sort of protection or weapons but he doubted that even if he asked, Batman would simply hand over a baton or two.

Damian watched the masked vigilantes huddle together as Damian grew more impatient with each passing minute. He turned to the warehouse and then back to the group of, now four, vigilantes.

Robin nodded and headed over to Damian, “So, Batman and Nightwing are gonna head in first, get the drop on ‘em, and then Spoiler and I will go in, make sure the coast is clear, once we give the signal, that’s when you can come in.”

Damian looked at the vigilantes incredulously, “You expect me to sit back while my little sister could be in danger?”

“Yes,” the Bat said simply.

Damian scoffed, “Unbelievable.”

Batman took a step toward the young boy, “Believe it or you can wait in the Batmobile. As far as I’m concerned, you’re lucky you’ve come this far.”

Damian was already on edge with Aurora being taken, and this old man was seriously pushing him, “You wanna test how far my luck can get me?” Damian spat back.

Nightwing stepped in between them, “Alright, let’s all take a second and focus.”

Damian scoffed at the supposed adults and waited for them to get in the warehouse and give the signal. The Bat and Nightwing entered first, Robin and Spoiler waiting and watching until it was their turn. After the other two entered, it was near torture for Damian to wait.

Although he did fully intended on waiting for the signal, Aurora’s screams came first.

Damian sprinted into the warehouse, swiping a tire iron from an unconscious goon as he passed, and into the battle. He did his best to make sure he used nonlethal attacks only even if these assholes deserved death for attempting to kidnap Aurora.

Damian fought his way through the goons, focusing only on the familiar squeaks he could hear coming from a side room. He stalked towards the last guy who stood guarding the door as he crumpled to his knees, whimpering before he even laid a hand on him. Damian shoved him out of the way before kicking the door down. There was a chorus of cries as the door fell to the ground with a loud crash. Damian could see the silhouettes of at least two dozen kids, but as he moved to enter the room, he was stopped by Robin.

“Damian, I know you wanna see your sister, but with the way you look right now...” he trailed off. Damian looked down at his clothes and hands, noticing for the first time just how bloodstained he was. Maybe he didn’t go as easy on them as he had meant to.

“Why’re there so many of them?” Damian pointed into the room of children.

Robin put his hands in front of him in an attempt to calm Damian down, “This is a case we’ve been working on for a little while now.”

Damian scoffed, “And you’d have let them suffer if I hadn’t insisted on acting?”

Robin opened his mouth but closed it again, “We didn’t have a solid lead on their location,” Spoiler spoke up, “Not until I was patrolling this area and saw some guys chasing one of the kids who managed to break free. They got her before I could though.”

Damian sighed and nodded, he knew he was just looking for reasons to get mad at the vigilantes. They had their ways of doing this and Damian was not included in that. He turned around as he attempted to wipe the blood off his hands at the very least.

“That kid’s insane,” Spoiler whispered to Robin as they began guiding the kids out of the warehouse.

As Damian headed out into the fresh night air, he could hear one of the kids whining and struggling.

“No, I want Dami, he’ll come, I know he will,” Damian turned around to see Spoiler trying to console a very upset Aurora as she protested to the vigilante.

Aurora looked up and saw Damian before he could move out of her line of sight and she sprinted towards him.

“Dami!” she cried as she latched on to him, “I knew you’d come!”

Damian was a little stunned but eventually, he hugged her back, “Yeah, of course I would, little one.”

Spoiler walked over to the two of them, “That’s your little sister?” she asked pointing to Aurora.

Damian nodded and Aurora nuzzled her face on his shoulder as he carried her.

Spoiler nodded, “She’s got a lot of fight in her. She’s the one who almost made it free,” she told Damian, not that he was surprised. Out of all the kids in the orphanage, Damian and Aurora had become nearly inseparable so he had made sure she knew how to defend herself.

Robin offered to take Damian’s bloody sweater as the GCPD arrived to avoid unnecessary questions. After giving Damian’s story and what Aurora could contribute, one of the officers offered to give the two a ride back as it was quite a ways to the orphanage.

Aurora slept in the car but as soon as they got back and were embraced/nearly strangled by Janet, she was wide awake.

They entered the house after thanking the officer and Damian’s already wired senses were screaming as confetti fell lazily on him and the kids all screamed together, “Happy birthday, Damian!”

He looked to Janet, “You didn’t think I’d have forgotten?” she smirked.

Damian chuckled and thanked the kids who were all up past their bedtime, but persevered for Damian, or rather, the cake.

“Thanks, Janet,” Damian smiled at her, feeling the tension in his body released as he watched the kids run around the kitchen. He felt at ease watching them, watching his family.

Janet gave him a side-hug, “It’s the least I could do. You remember the first birthday you had here?” she asked with an amused smile.

Damian laughed, “Yeah, that was definitely a disaster,” he mumbled as he remembered. He had been so stubborn and refused to tell her when his birthday was and when she found out it had already passed, she panicked. Janet had tried to throw a surprise party, only for the young Damian to obliterate the cake because he thought he was being attacked, “And yet you still insist on surprising me.”

Janet shook her head, “Well you still insist on forgetting your birthday, young man.”

Damian rolled his eyes and pushed himself off the counter to fight off the other children for some cake.

——————————

“So,” Tim started after they had finished the debrief from the child abduction case, “What’d you think?”

Bruce grunted as he removed his boots.

Dick leaned over to Tim, “I think that means he liked him.”

Tim chuckled and nodded.

Bruce sighed and turned to Alfred who stood by with tea for them, “I think it’s time we paid a visit to Happy Home Orphanage.”

Alfred nodded, “The one that you fund?”

Bruce raised an eyebrow and nodded.

“The one on the outskirts of the city?”

“Alfred,” Bruce sighed as he started.

“The one that the Alistair boy just so happens to be at?”

There was a long pause as the billionaire and butler were engaged in a heated staring contest before Bruce broke and sighed.

“Yes, Alfred. That one.”

Alfred smiled, “Very good, sir. I’ll call in the morning.”

——————————

End of Part Two

[ginmo]

Do you think JB will end together? Like, marrying and maybe even having kids? I know it’s a lot to hope in asoiaf universe, but I so wish they would!

GRRM is aiming for a bittersweet ending. There’s even a quote from him saying that he already knows who’s going to marry who. 

“I know the broad strokes, and I’ve known the broad strokes since 1991. I know who’s going to be on the Iron Throne. I know who’s gonna win some of the battles, I know the major characters, who’s gonna die and how they’re gonna die, and who’s gonna get married and all that. The major characters.” [x]

He clarified that “major characters” includes the main Lannisters. This was said in 2016, after his last asoiaf book, which means marriage is for future books. It could literally be any pairing for one of the major characters, or multiple pairings. My point is, there will be at least one marriage for the major characters that didn’t happen on the show. Personally? I think there’s going to be a couple, and whether or not Jaime and/or Brienne dies by the end, they’ll still be one of them. This is going to be kinda long…..

Brienne - Marriage 

Brienne was introduced to us on an unrequited love plot line.

Brienne was on her feet as well. “Your Grace, give me but a moment to don my mail. You should not be without protection.” King Renly smiled. “If I am not safe in the heart of Lord Caswell’s castle, with my own host around me, one sword will make no matter … not even your sword, Brienne. Sit and eat. If I have need of you, I’ll send for you.” His words seemed to strike the girl harder than any blow she had taken that afternoon. “As you will, Your Grace.” Brienne sat, eyes downcast.- ACOK

Brienne dropped to her knees. “If I must part from Your Grace, grant me the honor of arming you for battle.” Catelyn heard someone snigger behind her. She loves him, poor thing, she thought sadly. She’d play his squire just to touch him, and never care how great a fool they think her. - ACOK

And what’s emphasized in her first PoV?

Renly Baratheon had been more than a king to her. She had loved him since first he came to Tarth on his leisurely lord’s progress, to mark his coming of age. - AFFC

Reciprocated love is her arc. The first time we meet her she’s described as crushing hard on Renly Baratheon, and it’s during the melee at Bitterbridge. The melee is brought up again in AFFC, during one of Brienne’s PoV chapters.

In the mělée at Bitterbridge she had sought out her suitors and battered them one by one, Farrow and Ambrose and Bushy, Mark Mullendore and Raymond Nayland and Will the Stork. She had ridden over Harry Sawyer and broken Robin Potter’s helm, giving him a nasty scar. And when the last of them had fallen, the Mother had delivered Connington to her. This time Ser Ronnet held a sword and not a rose. Every blow she dealt him was sweeter than a kiss.

Loras Tyrell had been the last to face her wroth that day. He’d never courted her, had hardly looked at her at all, but he bore three golden roses on his shield that day, and Brienne hated roses. The sight of them had given her a furious strength. She went to sleep dreaming of the fight they’d had, and of Ser Jaime fastening a rainbow cloak about her shoulders.- AFFC

Let’s look at the structure. The paragraph before Brienne falls asleep is setting up the context for the dream. Paragraph #1 is specifically referencing the men who participated in the bet as her suitors, thus connecting the mělée to an element of her dark, romantic history as Brienne knocks every asshole into the dirt with blows sweeter than a kiss.

Paragraph #2, still connected to the romance theme of paragraph #1, transitions into Brienne falling asleep and dreaming of her last fight with Loras. She then gets cloaked.

Keep in mind that in a wedding ceremony, the groom places a cloak of his house colors around the bride’s shoulders. Now, knowing a professional author is writing this, and there’s a romance theme established in paragraph #1 with the term suitors, and if we’re continuing the theme, in her dream the KG cloaking is symbolic of a wedding ceremony.

Unlike the show’s garbage interpretation of Brienne, her life-long dream has never been about becoming a member some kingsguard (also note, knight and kingsguard are not synonymous. You can become a knight without swearing your life away to a KG). This is why she joined Renly’s:

Renly Baratheon had been more than a king to her. She had loved him since first he came to Tarth on his leisurely lord’s progress, to mark his coming of age. Her father welcomed him with a feast and commanded her to attend; elsewise she would have hidden in her room like some wounded beast. She had been no older than Sansa, more afraid of sniggers than of swords. They will know about the rose, she told Lord Selwyn, they will laugh at me. But the Evenstar would not relent.

And Renly Baratheon had shown her every courtesy, as if she were a proper maid, and pretty. He even danced with her, and in his arms she’d felt and her feet had floated across the floor. Later others begged a dance of her, because of his example. From that day forth, she wanted only to be close to Lord Renly, to serve him and protect him. - AFFC

She literally fell in love with him because he treated her, “as if she were a proper maid, and pretty.” BTW, this is introduced in her first PoV, emphasizing the romance theme to her arc.

Feeling too ugly and unworthy to be a lady, and after three failed betrothals and Brienne crying “bitter tears” over Margaery marrying her king, she left Tarth and pledged her life to Renly in the form of becoming a member of his KG (hmmm joining the kingsguard to be close to someone she loves? Sounds like someone else!). Feeling like a failure as a lady and heir, she played to her more masculine traits and married Renly in the only way she could.

The KG being a form of marriage to her is shown in the dream passage as well, by how after knocking her “suitors” into the dust, she becomes a member of Renly’s KG and essentially marries him. All the suitors are disposed of, but in the end, she allows one man to cloak her.

But… in her dream, the person is no longer Renly LOL. It may be his cloak, but it’s not his face. WHO IS CLOAKING HER? Jaime fucking Lannister.

And guess what? Jaime replaces HER BETROTHED in another dream.

Finally the doors opened, and her betrothed strode into her father’s hall. She tried to greet him as she had been instructed, only to have blood come pouring from her mouth. She had bitten her tongue off as she waited. She spat it at the young knight’s feet, and saw the disgust on his face. “Brienne the Beauty,” he said in a mocking tone.

“I have seen sows more beautiful than you.” He tossed the rose in her face. As he walked away, the griffins on his cloak rippled and blurred and changed to lions. Jaime! she wanted to cry. Jaime, come back for me! But her tongue lay on the floor by the rose, drowned in blood. -AFFC

This is romantic rejection from an actual event that happened to her, and Brienne is unable to stop her betrothed (who turned into Jaime in the dream) from walking away, but GRRM LITERALLY SAID HIS INTENT WAS BEAUTY AND THE BEAST, and since we were introduced to her on an unrequited love plot, with love always being a cruel joke to her, with romantic rejection and how she’s been so unworthy and undesirable as a lover smacking us in the face, RECIPROCATED LOVE IS HER ARC.

And it isn’t just love that’s part of her arc, it’s also MARRIAGE, because it has been connected to marriage.

Brienne - Motherhood

Brienne has a lot of motherly qualities in the books and has also never rejected the idea of being a mother. At one point, she daydreams about her first betrothed and wondered what her life would have been like if he survived childhood.

Had he lived, they would have been wed within a year of her first flowering, and her whole life would have been different. She would not be here now, dressed in man’s mail and carrying a sword, hunting for a dead woman’s child. More like she’d be at Nightsong, swaddling a child of her own and nursing another. It was not a new thought for Brienne. It always made her feel a little sad, but a little relieved as well. - AFFC

Yes, a part of her was relieved. I mean… duh haha. Who wouldn’t be? She was going to marry a stranger, she most likely would have been treated like dirt, she would have been young, and everything about her life would have been different. The point is, the thought still made her sad. If there wasn’t any part of her that desired marriage and motherhood, she would have only felt relief, and, well, “it was not a new thought” for her.

Keep in mind, Brienne thinks she’ll only ever be a fighter because, even though her book personality is very nurturing and motherly, she believes she’s physically unfit to be a lady and mother

“I will tell you true, Brienne. I do not know. My son may be a king, but I am no queen … only a mother who would keep her children safe, however she could.” 

“I am not made to be a mother. I need to fight.” - ACOK

The next bit I wouldn’t really say this is motherhood foreshadowing, but I do still find it interesting that GRRM wanted Catelyn to have a little motherhood discussion with Brienne, when she could have spoken about it to any other character.

“Children are a battle of a different sort.” Catelyn started across the yard. “A battle without banners or warhorns, but no less fierce. Carrying a child, bringing it into the world … your mother will have told you of the pain …” 

“I never knew my mother,” Brienne said. “My father had ladies … a different lady every year, but …”

“Those were no ladies,” Catelyn said. “As hard as birth can be, Brienne, what comes after is even harder. At times I feel as though I am being torn apart. Would that there were five of me, one for each child, so I might keep them all safe.” - ACOK

This next one…

Can it be? Somewhere inside our swordswench is a mother just squirming to give birth. What you really want is a sweet pink babe to suckle at your teat. - AFFC

I mean, it’s Hyle being an ass lol, but I’m not going to ignore the fact an author decided to put that in there, and it’s not the first time the autor connected Brienne to motherhood. 

Also…

“A daughter.” Brienne’s eyes filled with tears. “He deserves that. A daughter who could sing to him and grace his hall and bear him grandsons. He deserves a son too, a strong and gallant son to bring honor to his name. Galladon drowned when I was four and he was eight, though, and Alysanne and Arianne died still in the cradle. I am the only child the gods let him keep. The freakish one, not fit to be a son *or* daughter.” - AFFC

She IS fit to be both! That’s the point! She bitterly thinks that, due to her insecurities. Brienne’s arc: lady, wife, mother, warrior/knight, heir. Her character exists to embrace the outwardly masculine and inwardly feminine traits, becoming it all and redefining what it means to be a lady and woman in that society. 

Jaime - Marriage and Fatherhood

The narrative purpose of Barristan Selmy being released from the KG is to show that it’s possible for members to be dismissed. “A kingsguard serves for life” is mentioned THREE TIMES in ASOS, about Jaime.

“I can,” he interrupted. “And I will. There’s precedent. I’ll look in the White Book and find it, if you like. Crippled or whole, a knight of the Kingsguard serves for life.” - ASOS

“Tywin regarded Jaime as his rightful heir.”

“*Jaime* … Jaime has taken vows. The Kingsguard serve for life.” - ASOS

“I am a knight of the Kingsguard. The Lord Commander of the Kingsguard! And that’s all I mean to be!” - ASOS

I think it’s safe to assume he’s going to be removed from the KG at some point in the books (I suspected for years that Jaime would be released from the KG, so when it happened on the show… well, my thoughts on the show: here). The narrative purpose of releasing Jaime from the KG is to release him from vows, to free him up for marriage and be heir. That’s literally why Tywin wanted him to leave the KG in the first place.

Have some bitter Jaime thoughts.

That was the first time that Jaime understood. It was not his skill with sword and lance that had won him his white cloak, nor any feats of valor he’d performed against the Kingswood Brotherhood. Aerys had chosen him to spite his father, to rob Lord Tywin of his heir.

Even now, all these years later, the thought was bitter. And that day, as he’d ridden south in his new white cloak to guard an empty castle, it had been almost too much to stomach. He would have ripped the cloak off then and there if he could have, but it was too late. He had said the words whilst half the realm looked on, and a Kingsguard served for life. 

Part of Jaime’s arc is to step into that role of heir. He did something stupid and out of love in his youth, and now he’s rediscovering his identity.

As for becoming a father…

Perhaps he was the monster they claimed. If the Father Above came down to offer him back his son or his hand, Jaime knew which he would choose. He had a second son, after all, and seed enough for many more. If Cersei wants another child I’ll give her one … and this time I’ll hold him, and the Others take those who do not like it. Robert was rotting in his grave, and Jaime was sick of lies. 

He turned abruptly and galloped back to find Brienne. Gods know why I bother. She is the least companionable creature I’ve ever had the misfortune to meet. -ASOS

Okay okay look at this. There’s a couple of things to unpack here. 

Jaime never cared for Joffrey. That’s not a secret. If he were to make a decision about choosing joffrey and his hand, it’s implied he’d choose his hand. But then he justifies this by basically saying, “because he was rotten and I have another son anyway and I can always have more children” which shows that the idea of being a father is actually something of value to him. He ACTUALLY WANTS TO FATHER- “this time I’ll hold him.” Which to me is saying that fatherhood is part of his arc, because why else would that development be thrown in there? Sure, it can be there to show he’s maturing as a character and is desiring to be a responsible parent to Tommen, but then what’s the point of throwing in the detail about MAKING MORE children? Wanting to raise them FROM BIRTH this time? And, looking at structure, notice the transition from that paragraph to the next? 

Jaime was sick of lies.

He turned abruptly and galloped back to find Brienne. Gods know why I bother.

LMFAO

WHAT

Jaime thinking about producing future children and how he wants to raise his next child -> Jaime is SICK OF LIES (this is before “He’s lied to you a thousand times, and so have I” And before he finds out about the affairs btw LOL just wait Jaime you’ll be extra fed up) -> WHERE’S BRIENNE? WAIT, GODS, WHY AM I DOING THIS? THIS ISN’T FORESHADOWING SHE’S MY FUTURE OR ANYTHING 

GRRM as the Gods, knowing why he bothers

In AFFC, GRRM still explores this fatherhood desire, even without Cersei.

Once he found the Blackfish, he would be free to return to King’s Landing, where he belonged. My place is with my king. With my son. Would Tommen want to know that? The truth could cost the boy his throne. Would you sooner have a father or a chair, lad? Jaime wished he knew the answer. He does like stamping papers with his seal. The boy might not even believe him, to be sure. Cersei would say it was a lie. My sweet sister, the deceiver. He would need to find some way to winkle Tommen from her clutches before the boy became another Joffrey. And whilst at that, he should find the lad a new small council too. If Cersei can be put aside, Ser Kevan may agree to serve as Tommen’s Hand. - AFFC

And FOR ONE OF MY FAVORITES

Unbidden, his thoughts went to Brienne of Tarth. Stupid stubborn ugly wench. He wondered where she was. Father, give her strength. Almost a prayer … but was it the god he was invoking, the Father Above whose towering gilded likeness glimmered in the candlelight across the sept? Or was he praying to the corpse that lay before him? Does it matter? They never listened, either one. The Warrior had been Jaime’s god since he was old enough to hold a sword. Other men might be fathers, sons, husbands, but never Jaime Lannister, whose sword was as golden as his hair. He was a warrior, and that was all he would ever be. - AFFC

Jaime’s thoughts, unbidden, go to Brienne when he’s thinking of his men getting women pregnant BTW LOL, and this passage SCREAMS the fatherhood theme.

After thinking of women getting pregnant he PRAYS TO THE FATHER FOR BRIENNE. Whether it’s the god or his own father doesn’t matter. The point is, he’s making a connection to Father while praying to keep Brienne safe. And then he thinks about how the Warrior was always his god and, “other men might be fathers, sons, husbands, but never Jaime Lannister, whose sword was as golden as his hair.” WHY?! Why is that bit in there? In the same paragraph? And then end with a sentence that sounds BITTER AF about how he’ll only ever be a warrior? why the fuck did it just jump from Jaime thinking about Brienne, to praying to the father and then “LOL BUT THE WARRIOR let’s randomly talk about my identity”….?? It’s literally completely irrelevant? Unless…the author is connecting Jaime to THE FATHER for him to begin identifying with A DIFFERENT GOD because THAT’S HIS FUTURE and he’s hinting that BRIENNE IS THE ONE TO GIVE HIM THAT WHICH IS WHY HE NEEDS HER SAFE. (And of course Jaime isn’t consciously making these connections, I’m talking about the author’s foreshadowing decisions)

AGAIN

and this time I’ll hold him, and the Others take those who do not like it. Robert was rotting in his grave, and Jaime was sick of lies.

He turned abruptly and galloped back to find Brienne. Gods know why I bother.

And last but not least, the weirdest argument:

“Okay but if Brienne marries Jaime she’d be a lady and he’d make her be something she isn’t.” 

This has always been a really funny argument and my favorite response to this is, “Jaime didn’t give her a valyrian steel sword to make a sandwich with it.” 

Anyway, GRRM once said Brienne is Sansa with a sword. As mentioned above, Brienne never rejected her title as a lady as she does on the show. Book!Brienne ran away because she felt too ugly to be a proper lady. Her insecurities and the mockery she endured caused her to shy away from anything outwardly feminine.

Keeping in mind that Jaime and Brienne are literally designed to be BatB, imo it’s not a coincidence that Jaime and Brienne only think they’ll ever be warriors.

THEY WON’T. 

They’re both going to finally experience genuine reciprocated love, fuck, get married, and maybe parent and if you strongly believe one of them has to die before the end of this then all of this will happen before that death I SAID WHAT I SAID. 

[androgynousblackbox]

A day on the life of your favourite radio host

You woke up before your alarm did it’s job and then turned it off when it did. After putting on your shoes for home, stand up to open up the window and breath the smell of the beatiful flowers around the house. What a lovely morning! The sun was clear, there wasn’t any bird chirping and you could feel optimistic about today. But then again, when weren’t you a ball of sunshine with that bright smile on your face?

You could have greeted your neighborhood good morning, of course, but there was no one left to greet. The houses both at the sides of your own and in the front were empty, waiting for new owners, but it was so hard on the current economy and so funny for you in particular. How many people have sold their own children for one of those houses? Killed for them? Lied, stole? Oh, who knows! But it was entertaining to think about it as you dressed up.

You wear a white shirt you ironed yourself last night after cleaning it up; the closed vest matching the tone of your pants and your shoes, so pleasantly shiny and clean as if they were new. A wonderful way to start any day as you hummed your way down to the kitchen, preparing some toast and tea. You made a recount of your nocturnal activities and mental notes to keep track off for later. Thank goodness you had such a excelent memory, because the things you needed to remember were not things meant for writing on any common language. After cleaning up everything, you stepped outside and looked at your house with a inevitable sigh of nostalgia. It looked almost exactly the same as when your dear beloved mother was there, even the boarded up window of the attic. To think your own mother didn’t believe you when you said you threw the neighbor’s kid from there. It had been a perfectly honest accident. You just opened up for that small little boy to reach the wooden plane that had landed on your roof and then watched with amusement as he tried to balance out over the inclined surfice, only to finally slip out and meet his bitter end against the ground. You would have never harm a child, that is for sure. A man such as yourself might not have a lot of rules to live by, but that was certainly one of them. But watch them do reckless things without moving a finger to prevent it… well, that was another story, isn’t it? He couldn’t control gravity. And who was he to intervene betwen a boy and his new toy? You walked all the way to the radio station you were working, greeting everyone you knew and even some that didn't; they stared at you with such pathetic little admiration that was hard to resist to aknowledge it. Sat down on your chair, rolled up your sleeve  and waited for the signal indicating you were ready to talk. “Good day, my lovely listeners! Isn’t a espectular day today? Our way of living maybe be crushing under our feet and the hope of ever returning to what is normal seems dimmer with every second we are breathing the poison that is our life, but don’t fret, your good friend radio host will always be here for you! Let’s take a look to the news of the day, shall we?” You grabbed on a newspaper an assistant had handed to you and unfolded it, taking care for not to do it over the microphone. “My, it seems like the rate of suicides is rising once again! It seems that everyone’s salary is not the only thing that is dropping, ha! Oh, and it seems so many kids are currently on the streets right now as their parents sold them for their own sake. Better take care of your garbage, listeners, or you might find one of them looking for their lunch as you are listening and then you will have to clean up that mess! Mmm, I guess you could throw away a couple of scraps for the little lads but, between you and me, my friend, do you really want to? But you all know how children are, and unfortunely  their attempts can’t be avoided until are not able to keep looking anymore. It’s a sad, sad situation, indeedy, but that is why we must appreciate still the few delights we have left on this corrupted world, my friend. Like music! Let us hear some more about that lady that has everyone perking up their ears.” You flicked some buttons and put one one of the newest records on the station as you received a few calls on the meantime. Most of the calls were about people talking about their own sad situation. I had to sell the precious chinese porcelain of my grandmother, I lost all my money thanks to some thief, the bread is so expensive that my family is eating paper and blah blah blah Almost the exact same speech from yesterday, too boring to lose too much time on them, and instead concetrated on the people requesting for a new song or talking about their new misfortunes that your dear listeners haven’t heard of yet. Someone had to actually eat their pet dog and that got their entire family a food poisoning! Ha! Hilarious!  You can make up this, folks! You continued the show until midday and you had to say goodbye for now to give place to the next host. You didn’t have to come back until a couple of hours so you had a chance to grab lunch on some of the few restaurants that remained open. There a lady asked you if you were who she thought you were and you said yes, inviting her to take a seat in front of you and engage on a conversation. There was no wedding ring or the usual bags under the eyes of a mother stressing about what to feed her children, so when the route went about talking for a date, you played along to please her by inviting her to come over your house so you could both have a home meal. She blushed and pretended like it was a hard choice. You played as well, convincing her that it would be fine, just a perfectly decent, not at all attention worthy dinner between a pair of new friends, nothing else to see. After a little of back and forth, she finally promised to be there and stood up to continue with her chores. You made another mental note and kept enjoying your food, that you were almost sure it was actually a cat caught on an alley, but at least tasted good. Back to work, you put music, told a few easy jokes that your mother was so fond of and had a little talk with a carpenter who had his entire business burning just last week, a fire in which all his family died during their sleep. It was highly amusing to ask him about if he still dreamt about their faces so peacefully in the night, as if they were sleeping, but knowing they were never going to wake up again and he was, quite frankly, at least somewhat responsable.

Of course with enough jokes that the carpenter just sniffed a little bit and was able to contain from crying until the microphone was off. Then the night came and you had to say goodbye until tomorrow. And they better wished them luck, dear listeners, because he was going to have a date tonight with some lovely lady! You returned back home with your usual high spirit, humming the most popular song today, and prepared everything for the big event. When your new friend appeared, the dinner was already done and ready to be served. Some delicious deer meat that he bought from some local hunters that before were just doing it for the hobby, but now they practically only survived on their meat, whenever they could find it. Unfortunately the population of aceptable prey had diminished so much since so many other people had similar ideas, so it was getting quite hard out there. Well, at least people were being more creative now! Didn’t you noticed some “feline grace” on your meal today? Ha! You were kidding of course. Not really. Anyway, as you both finished, you took her hand to accompany you into the basement, where you had your record player and they could listen to some nice music more comfortable. Why do you have a record player on the basement, she aks? Why, it was initially just not to bother your sweet mother since she prefered a silent environment to read her books, but even after her death, it became just a habit to keep it there. Yes, it is smells terrible, you know, you assured her as you secure the grip on her wrist and closetd the door with a key only you had. It was dark, you know, and you were aware the smell was so intense that was going to make your darling guest to puke on her beautiful dress. What is that smell? Oh, nothing extraodinary, just the stench of rotting corpses you had yet to get rid of. Oh, what a enjoyable moment of silence was that. Did she thought you were joking? Did she assume you meant anything else but exactly what you said? On the darker stairs you could see her face changing, the beautiful and slow metamorphosis from a pleasant but confused smile to an actual realization that you were not joking, not at all, and your smile wasn’t because you were laughing at her incredulity but rather, at her whole life. By the time she turned her head to the door, you had already pulled her down stair and kicked her knees out so she would stumble the rest of the way and crash her head against the concret cube you had precisely for those situation. Ah, it was almost magical when their fall was just right and their lives ended with a clear and satisfying crack. The truly fun part is when they didn’t die right away, just knocked out for the time being, with some unimportant brain damage nobody cared about; then you had the chance to help them stay alive a little longer… and they'd regret the fall didn’t kill them. You were so excited when you discovered she was still breathing despite the blood and the weird shape her head had adquired. So you hummed happily as you dragged to the center of your hard learned symbols and grabbed some of the ritual knifes all over the wall. When you were done with her, you cut out some of her bodyparts and put it on a bag, but it didn’t seem heavy enough and added some other parts of the other guests you had the past week. They weren’t actually rotting, of course. You kinda exagerated it just for the shits and giggles, but you had to start getting rid of them again. They were so much useful outside on the garden, feeding the flowers that you were proud to keep alive, colorful and beautiful against an ugly reality. As usual, once the bag was sufficiently heavy enough, all that was left was put in a suitcase and carried to your car; it was to be buried under the same tree where the powers you were so devoted to would have their feast. They were so glotonous those rascals, but it was a small price to pay for all the things you were promised long ago. Even if the time you were going to receive those rewards wasn't exactly clear, and even if it was a tiny bit frustrating, you didn't mind. The show must go on, as they say! The job was entertaining per se and you wouldn’t have minded to continue doing it for as long as necesary. Besides, it’s not like you could actually do anything even if you did had a problem. Which you don’t, for sure, so who cares? When you came back on the morning, you were surprised to see some people coming and going the house on your left, not just as sometimes curious youngsters would do, but carrying stuff from one place to another and not minding seeing enter your home, a bright disposition on your face despite still needing a shower. New neighbors, finally! How long was it since you took out the last one? Not that long, that you could remember. Oh, you so hope they were fun people.  Or miserable ones, which was almost the same thing as far you were concerned. The last thing you needed in your neighborhood was boredom.

[poppibranchlover]

Nine Lives, One Fight - Part 11

The story: Deep in the forest of Troll Town, there lies a mysterious tiny purple mushroom that has a secret magical ability. King Peppy calls this mushroom forbidden for all Trolls to go near it. One day, while Branch is out in the woods doing his survival research studying, he encounters it and, not knowing it is a regular mushroom, decides to harvest it and bring it home. But in the next morning, its magic effects transform him into a small blue cat! After being sent to the animal pound, his girlfriend, Poppy, finds him and decides to adopt him, although not recognizing it is Branch. Desperate to finish his research project due for a special event invented by Poppy, Branch is forced to learn how to behave like a pet cat and must figure out what caused him to become one.

You already seen what had happened in Part 10. Now get ready for Part 11!:

Branch ran through the path of the large forest, lost and scared. He wanted to go home by himself without Poppy’s help, but with scary noises of predators growling and swaying tree branches filling throughout the woods, it was hard for him to do this on his own. He was just a small tiny kitten, and has no choice but to deal with the problem he got himself into.

While Branch was still running, a voice suddenly shouted “Hey! You dropped this!”

Branch quickly stopped in his tracks and listened. He sniffed the ground, trying to find what is dropped in front of him. He approached a bush and stopped sniffing suddenly as his wide cat eyes were staring directly at...

...two long rabbit ears! They were peeking through the bush, shivering. Branch titled his head to the side in confusion. “Is that...a tiny rabbit? Lost in the woods all by himself?”

He cautiously approached the bush. Maybe this cute little animal was looking for a home...just like him. The tiny snow-white creature looked up at Branch. It was so innocent that it didn’t even know it was in danger of being lost in the forest.

Branch bent down to the precious rabbit. The bunny stayed hidden deep in the leaves. It looked up, its nose twitching, as Branch said gently to it “Awwww. Hey there, little guy. I heard your owner kinda left you behind. Come on. Let me return you back to him!”

He carefully opened his mouth to grab one of the little rabbit’s ears, but before he can, the creature popped up from hiding and suddenly spoke directly to Branch with the same Troll-like voice he heard in the first place! “How do you think I went away from him, you fuzzo?!”

Branch’s eyes widened in horror and he couldn’t believe his ears! He jumped back, stuttering “W-wait a minute! Did you just talk?!”

“Oh yeah I am! What do ya think I’m talking about?” the bunny said, raising an eyebrow. It leaned over with a smirk and said “What’s up?”

Branch suddenly screamed and retreated to a nearby bush.

Then he peeked out from it and shivered with fear, trying to understand what he just witnessed.

“No way!” Branch exclaimed. “Y-you can t-talk to me?!”

The rabbit called out from the distance in its calm voice “Hey, kid. Don’t be scared of me. I’m surprised to find out that you can understand me! Isn’t this great?”

“No, not really!” Branch cried, still hiding in the bush. Was he going crazy? He has never heard bunnies speaking to him before, and now he ended up meeting one that can understand him! He closed his eyes for a moment and opened them again, thinking he was still dreaming.

Then he jumped out of the bush and walked towards the rabbit, attempting to know if it doesn’t talk to him anymore. It just stood there on that bush, nose twitching and staring at him.

Before Branch can sigh with relief, it suddenly spoke again “Are you gonna stop stressing about your feelings?”

As it said it, Branch shook his head and stomped his paw on the ground. “No! No, no, no, no, no!” he shouted. “This can’t be happening! Rabbits don’t talk to me like that! Now I can understand you?! How is that possible?!”

“Well, it’s probably nothing!” the rabbit said cheerfully. “I just can’t believe you are actually talking to a rabbit, aren’t you?!”

“No, don’t do the innocent,” Branch said nervously, pacing back and forth. “I must be crazy! What is going on? What a nightmare!”

“You can understand me!” said the bunny with a wide smile on its face. “It’s no nightmare, it’s...”

Simultaneously, Branch said “Horrible!” while the bunny happily squealed “Awesome!” 

“Okay, seriously. This needs to be stopped,” Branch demanded. “I ask you a question. Why you can speak to me like that?”

The little bunny looked down. At first, Branch felt bad for a moment in front of this cute pouty rabbit face, but he had to get some answers.

“I...I prefer not to say who I really am,” it simply answered. “But I live in the forest all alone until I saw a helpless little cat like you running from a large scary dog!”

Branch did not believe his ears. He recognized that creature. It was the same bunny he had run into while he was being pursued by the big black dog yesterday!

“So...you know me?” he asked in disbelief.

“Of course! And I’m not alone in the woods anymore!” the rabbit said, laughing. “I never knew I needed a friend someday like you!”

“How did you know I am running from that huge dog yesterday?” asked Branch.

“It was easy. I was just hopping around when a fluff of blue fur tumbled straight into me, and just before I want to help, you run away and then that scary mutt was coming straight toward me. So I just hid and saw what is going on.”

“And that’s how you came here and meet me?”

“Yep!” the bunny said eagerly, wagging its little bushy tail. “Now that no predator is coming after you, you seem so lonely here. Are you looking for your owner too?”

“No!” Branch said, annoyed. “I’m trying to get home myself! I don’t want to get interested to being with my owner! But where is your owner?”

“He left me alone here because he hates my behavior of eating his food in the house,” the rabbit said sadly. “But here I am now!”

“Whoa,” said Branch. “That sounds so harsh. But you know what, I’ll tell him a word. Why am I talking to a rabbit and how do you understand what I’m saying?” He raised an eyebrow as he said this.

The rabbit scratched its fur with its back leg and replied “We always talk when Trolls are not around. Normally, nobody seems to hear us talk when we’re apart from them. When we’re near them, we usually communicate using animal language.”

Branch thought it was better for him to be with the other Trolls since he changed his habit, but after being turned into a cat, he has no other way how will the people know him. “Your explanation makes sense. But I am not sticking with my owner’s side for now. I gotta get home,” he told the bunny.

“What? Now?” it asked. “But we haven’t get to know each other yet! What’s your name, little cat? I want to know what cute name your owner pick?”

Cute name? Branch suddenly thought about Poppy nicknaming him “Mr. Tickle”, but if he did reveal this name to the rabbit, it might be too teasing for him. He sighed and blurted out “My name is Branch! I’m no cat! I’m a brave young survivalist!”

This caused the little rabbit to fall over and laugh. Branch frowned, utterly baffled. That creature was now thinking that his name sounds a lot funny!

“REALLY?!” the bunny howled through his laughter. “You called yourself a “cat survivalist”?! What a made-up!”

Branch has no idea what he is talking about. He insisted “Stop it! It’s not a “made-up” title! It’s a job I usually do in case of emergency!”

“Oh, I get it now! You’re a survivalist because you always do everything to survive in the forest!” said the rabbit, giggling.

“No. My job was to prepare for danger and keep my village safe. I hope you understand that. Please stop making fun of my title.”

The rabbit stopped giggling and smiled. “I’m sorry. It’s just I found how funny it is for cats to have jobs!”

“But most cats don’t do jobs!” Branch said firmly.

“But this one does have!” the rabbit said, playfully wagging his tail and wiggling his nose.

Branch stared at him. This creature looked so energetic like his girlfriend, Poppy, only that it was just a grey bunny, longing for a friend. Wanting to know more information about it, only one question burned his lips: “Who are you in reality? I want to know what does your owner name you!”

The little long-eared creature groaned. “Sorry, but I prefer not to reveal my own name.”

Branch sat, plunking his bottom down on the floor (as if it looked like his way of crossing his arms), with a stern look on his face. This little kid was already annoying him.

“If you want, you can give me a name as the queen does with you!” the bunny suggested, leaving a laugh escaping from his mouth.

Branch shot him a murderous look. Did this weird little creature just spy on him? He named the rabbit without any hesitation. “Hmmm…let me think about it. 'Wiggles'?”

“What?! That’s not supposed to be my name! Why?” the bunny asked, getting up on his four legs, obviously finding how completely stupid is that name.

“Because rabbits always wiggle their noses.” Branch pointed out.

“Urgh, fine!” Wiggles growled.

Meanwhile, Poppy and Biggie are almost finishing up their conversation regarding on presenting Branch to the Show-and-Tell festival.

“I truly understand,” Biggie was saying to Poppy. “But I have a question. How are worms and cats different from each other?”

“My father once said little worms have the genes of a cat. Compared to a normal cat, they might be a distant cousin!” explained Poppy.

“Oh, I’m sure Mr. Dinkles and Mr. Tickle will make great friends!” Biggie replied. “Besides, they’re definitely cousins now!! What do you think?”

“Of course they’ll get along so well together!” Poppy said excitedly. “This is just so exciting! Right, Mr...” She smiled and looked down at where Branch is supposed to be before realizing that he is not there.

“Mr. Tickle?” she said, confused. “Where’s Mr. Tickle?” She began to whimper.

“Oh no! Where did your little cat go?” Biggie asked, gasping. “He was right here!”

“I know!” cried Poppy. “But how could my sweet little cat disappear?”

“Perhaps a magician took him out of nowhere and made him vanish!” Biggie suggested, imagining how terrifying it is for someone looking like he had just kidnapped a cute kitten.

“I’ll go look for him!” Poppy said, desperate for her pet. She ran around the village, calling out for Branch. She was worried sick. Why Branch had to run away from her so he can return to his beloved bunker home? Poppy also didn’t know the reason why he did it as she only knew he did ran away on purpose.

“Mr. Tickle? Mr. Tickle, where are you?” she called as she searched the village high and low for her lost pet. “Oh, please be okay! Don’t run off! You’ll be caught by Animal Control if you get lost again!”

Poppy stopped walking for a moment and quietly cried. She had promised the Animal Control that she can take care of Branch more properly and now that he disappeared, it was now the time to face the consequences being made.

While Poppy was lamenting, Smidge was preparing her Show-and-Tell project when she noticed her in the corner. She approached her and said proudly “Hey, Poppy! Glad you made it just in time to test out my Muscle Spirit treadmill!” But when she realized she looked very sad, she asked “What’s wrong? Why are you so upset?”

“Oh, Smidge! I need your help!” Poppy begged. “I lost my pet cat, Mr. Tickle! I was talking with Biggie and he suddenly disappeared!”

“A lost cat?” Smidge was stunned. “Oh my gah! Whatever you’re talkin’ about, lost animals always go to Animal Control!”

“I know,” said Poppy. “AC officer Garth told me I should keep on eye on him otherwise he’s back in his poor little cage where I first met him!”

Smidge held her hand, trying to make her feel better. But the sad pink Troll could not be comforted unless Branch is found.

“We have to find him, Smidge,” Poppy whispered. “He can’t be gone forever.”

“Don’t worry,” the tiny yellow Troll told her. “I hope we’ll be able to find this poor little cat! I could definitely hear him meowing in the woods right now.”

Poppy looked at Smidge with determination in her eyes, hopeful that Branch would be back at any moment.

In the forest, Branch was grumbling as he walked. Wiggles the bunny was following him and he could not get rid of him anymore.

His innocence is irritating him. He hopped with joy and skipped between some rocks on the ground, humming an interminable song.

Branch viciously hissed at him in an effort to drive him away. “HIIISSSSSSSSSSS!!!!”

Wiggles stopped hopping and clumsily stepped backwards. But he didn’t seemed scared of him at all.

“You could not shut your mouth and listen to the sounds of the forest?!” Branch snarled. “Maybe you’d like that!”

“Aw, I can’t help it!” Wiggles exclaimed. “I’m too happy for that.”

Happy. Happiness. One thing that only Branch, Wiggles and the other Trolls could participate because Branch had to ensure the protection of the village.

Not quite. Branch is still in the form of a kitten, and he wants to go to his bunker since he is finally away from the captivity of the animal pound or Poppy’s care. He turned to Wiggles, who was running behind to stay beside him; his paws were too short because of trying to catch up.

“Look, I don’t need any help from a cute little bunny like you,” Branch said sternly. “I have a lot of things to do like, you know, preparing for the worst to come at Troll Village.”

“Ohhhhh.....okay,” said Wiggles, rolling his eyes and understanding his statement. “I get it now! It’s what a survivalist really does, right?”

“Well, yeah,” Branch said. “It’s the one possible thing I have to expect unless the queen might be organizing another party.” He turned back to the path where he was walking and continued on his way.

The tiny rabbit looked at him with his wide blue eyes. “What kind of party is the Troll queen preparing?” he asked.

Branch grumbled. “Some kind of Show-and-Tell party that also included cute little animals like us! It’s just that I don’t want to be used as my owner’s main object for the party!” He was shuddering at the statement that Poppy is planning to use him for her Show-and-Tell event while she is talking with Biggie earlier.

“Oh, that’s fascinating!” Wiggles said with a giggle. He was trying to catch a squirrel but it scurried away while he was talking. “I will definitely like attending to this party!”

“Yeah, that’s why I had to make my own project for this special occasion.”

“What project?” Wiggles didn’t quite catch those words.

“I am planning a research project on nature to show to the Trolls for this party or else I’m a failure to the rest of the world!” Branch explained, getting clearly annoyed. “I just don’t have enough days to finish it in time!”

“Just calm down,” Wiggles told him calmly. “All you need is a little practice, man! Get a hold of yourself!”

Yes, but getting a hold of myself would cause me to scream with rage when I can’t get any ideas to complete it, Branch thought while Wiggles jumped around, trying to catch some fireflies. He groaned and was about to continue walking when Poppy’s voice called out in the distance. “Mr. Tickle?! Where are you, little kitty?”

“Who’s calling out in the distance, calling for a guy named Mr. Tickle?” Wiggles asked with meek curiosity.

“It must be Poppy,” said Branch, looking at the direction where her voice was heard. “She’s looking for me! She nicknamed me Mr. Tickle when she kept me as a pet!”

When he said this sentence, Wiggles snickered as his nose twitched. He is thinking something funny about Branch once again.

“How many times do I have to tell you not to make fun of me?” he demanded.

“I have a question,” Wiggles said. “Why your nickname is “Mr. Tickle” and not 'Branch the cat survivalist'?”

Branch rolled his eyes. “It’s that ridiculous nickname my owner would usually gave me, and I hated to be called like that.”

“Oh, cool!” Wiggles chuckled. “But can I call you ‘Branch’ in the meantime?”

“Yeah, you can call me that name if you want,” the blue Troll-cat replied. “I prefer some people who usually call my name when they need me.”

But now Poppy really needs him. Branch can hear Smidge saying “There’s your pet! Go to him!”

Wiggles wanted to go to Poppy as well, but Branch pushed him away. “Please go home,” he growled, worrying that the bunny was not supposed to accompany him to Poppy’s house. “Your owner will also worry for you.”

The little bunny shrugged and turned to greet him. “I guess you’re right. Oh, well! See you tomorrow, my new cat friend!” he said cheerfully before hopping out of sight, leaving Branch standing alone in the woods again.

“Friend?” he asked as he watched the rabbit disappearing into the dark. “We just met and I’m already his friend? Pfft…” He sighed, annoyed.

Once Wiggles is already gone, Poppy rushed towards Branch, exclaiming happily “I found you, Mr. Tickle! Come here, sweet kitty!”

She picked him up and embraced him with a big cuddly hug. Branch wheezed uncomfortably while Poppy was hugging him and giggling.

“Oh, Mr. Tickle!” Poppy said, relieved that she found her pet cat. “I’m so glad you’re okay! Don’t ever leave my side again! Let’s get you home all warm and cozy!”

Now that she found Branch, Poppy proudly walked out of the forest, taking him in her arms and making her way back to her pod.

                                                  To Be Continued...

                                               Stay tuned for Part 12!

[flyswhumpcenter]

Bad Things Happen Bingo! The event where you send me requests according to this marvelous card! (Red cross is the completed prompt, character headshots are prompts I’ve already filled.)

"It's an enticing nectar, laced with deceits, Piercing straight through my heart-- ARROW" -ARROW, English translation

God, it's already my 2nd-to-last square to write for? That's kinda sad... It's been a hot, what, 6 months since I've written some TC? Truth be told, I was planning on filling "Sleep Deprivation" with Derek, but then a request came along... I still plan on finishing the WIP I have lying around for it because it was really fun to throw that on a Word file. Also are y'all ready for Uncle Fly's wacky nervous angsty wild ride because I guess this is set in an AU-ish timeline where PGS was found much earlier than 2021. This is kinda meant to be set in 2020 because why not, but the one mention of the date would rather remind you of 2019. Let's just say Derek is like your truly's and born at the end of the year. Anyway! The people in the TC server were really excited for this one so I hope I won't disappoint them. I tried some new and experimental things there so I hope it won't be too distracting or too much italics. Btw, can we bring the TC fandom back to life for 2020? It's the 15th anniversary of the franchise and the year Trauma Team happens in!

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Arrow to the Heart

Summary: GUILT getting eradicated didn't mean the staff of Caduceus USA were allowed to roam around freely without risking their lives every minute. Angie, Derek and Leslie all saw that through a different lense, caught between the memories of a dire crisis for Caduceus Europe and the drops spilled all over the operation table.

Fandom: Trauma Center Relationships: Pre-rel Derek/Angie, platonic Angie & Leslie, some focus on platonic Tyler & Derek

Wordcount: 5K words

Event hosted by @badthingshappenbingo​

AO3 version available here.

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As a blurry ceiling appears before her, a soft, familiar voice makes itself heard.

“Angie?”

Tilting her head to the right, struck with a terrible case of lethargy, her vision finally focuses: it’s her friend and workmate, hovering over her. She has a concerned expression on her face and a notepad in her hands, clutched against her chest.

“L-Leslie…?”

 As her eyes finish focusing, she realizes she knows this place: it’s a room at Caduceus. Why she’s there is vague at best and undecipherable at worst, but her throat is hoarse and she doesn’t feel like asking questions. She can only guess she still has some anaesthetic running in her system, considering the dull pain she has on her chest and shoulder.

“Yeah, that’s me, good deduction,” she says with a soft giggle. “How are you doing?”

“I’m… alive, I suppose…”

“You can thank Derek for that. He’s stabilized you before you’ve arrived there. I don’t know how he managed to pull that out, but I guess that’s what surgeons like him can do.”

Oh, right. She kind of remembers something now…

 Turns out it was all a trap.

 Well, of course it was. Now that he thought about it, something really wasn’t right with how they even got there. They got called for a situation eerily similar to a possible GUILT case, assuming the patient could have contracted PGS due to the former being extinct for the past two years of so. The condition of said patient was declining by the second, so they were rushed together to the scene.

If he went in like it was business as usual, Angie had picked on the negative vibes she was getting from it all, urging him to go slower and be more cautious. Dumb and naïve as he still kind of was, he preferred running around the place, wondering where the patient could be. As he called for one, absolutely divulging they were from Caduceus (with Angie not-so-silently trying to remind him not to do that and exert caution), the only thing he found was sudden, piercing, burning pain.

 “Wait… I… What happened…?”

“We wanted to ask you that,” Leslie replies in a more solemn tone. “From what little we could gather, Derek and you got shot when going for an on-field surgery.

“Ah, I… I do remember that… Turned out that…”

Turns out there had never been any patient, just a Delphi renegade, armed with a gun, few bullets and quite literally nothing left after escaping confinement from the rest of society.

“Do you remember anything else?”

Angie’s memories swim for a moment, trying to gather and brace themselves. Drop by drop, tear by tear, wave by wave, it comes back to her, slowly, surely. She clears her throat.

 Before he ran out of bullets, the renegade cowered away, leaving them with nothing but contemplating their own injuries. Hiding behind the wall of a little street, not too far from the stench of the almost-full trash bins and surrounded by heavy almost-silence, they were finally safe enough to open a light. To his displeasure, as soon as he tried to see whatever’s surrounding them, he spotted two things he didn’t like in the slightest: their surgery kit on the ground, half open, and a panting Angie next to the slightly scattered tools.

The first thing he noticed were the two bullet holes she had in her left shoulder and the right side of her abdomen. Fortunately, they didn’t seem to have hurt a lot of vital components and didn’t delve too deep into her flesh. Still, if he didn’t do anything, even with help coming their way eventually, she’d die on them; and he didn’t plan on letting that course of events happen. Not on his watch, never.

He sent a distress signal from his phone to Caduceus, then turned back to her, already grabbing the gloves and antibacterial gel from the case.

 “I see…” Leslie seems conflicted, to say the least. “At least, you got out alive of this terrible situation. We even expect you to make a quick recovery!”

“My wounds aren’t too bad, then?” Her voice was starting to win over the sleeping gas. Good.

“No! Again, they’d have been worse if Derek hadn’t stabilized you on the scene, but your wounds really aren’t bad. That man must have been a lousy shooter.”

“R-right… Derek tried to…”

 “Angie? You’re still with me?” He asked, trying to get her to stir back to consciousness.

Dishevelled strands of hair move with her quick, shallow breathing. She was obviously suffering, but nodded anyway, the blood already pouring from the wound and staining her pink uniform.

“Okay good… I… I can’t afford to anesthetize you, right now, so… I’m really sorry for what’s gonna happen!”

Her face slowly distorted even further.

“Y… You’re not gonna do that, right, Derek…?” She had an awkward, pained smile full of disbelief on her face.

“If I don’t, you may… You may not make it!”

She shut her eyes close for a few moments, then sighed heavily, slowly. He expected a rebuttal of some sorts, despite how much blood was spilling from the bullet holes, but she instead smiled and gazed at him with drooping eyes.

“…Then, let’s start the operation, Doctor.”

“I’ll try making it as painless as possible,” he repeated to both her and himself. “I won’t let you down, Angie.”

 Leslie’s lips were sewn shut by her retelling of their conversation in the little alleyway.

“To be honest with you… His job was sloppy. The bandages he put on your injuries weren’t straight. Of course, usually, we’d have had a conversation with him about that, but…”

“But?”

“Because of the circumstances, I don’t think we’re allowed to be any harsh on him for rubbing antibiotic gel improperly.”

“Oh God.”

“What’s wrong, Angie?”

“I remember that now. Vaguely, but… I remember.”

 The pain in his chest was excruciating, but that was besides the point. Angie needed him, right at that moment, to be strong and do his job. He had become a surgeon to save lives and what was a surgeon if he couldn’t do so for his assistant, his most trusted friend and ally? Besides, he needed to repay her for the time she helped Naomi save him from the demons trying to tear his heart apart. With blurring vision and trembling hands, he’d do his job, fulfil his mission. Even if it were to be its last, he’d successfully conduct this operation.

It wasn’t like he was the only one in pain either. Angie’s usually soft features were distorted by the suffering he was inflecting upon her by not being able to anesthetize her. Still, as much as he desired Cybil would be there by their side to allow for such a thing, she wasn’t there with us; so it was all on him, with the little he had at his disposal to deal with this.

 “I kept passing out and waking up, only to lose consciousness again. It was… terrifying. I thought we’d both die here and there, again and again.”

“When we found the both of you, you were barely conscious and your dress was half-zipped. Derek lost consciousness before he could finish dressing you back up.”

God, she must have been out of it for her not have been embarrassed to be so exposed in such a creepy context. The circumstances are all to blame on that one.

“…How is he, then?”

Leslie goes silent.

“How’s Derek?” Angie repeats, impatience and fear building in her throat.

The silence gets heavier. And heavier. And heavier.

 The scene was grizzly to say the least. He had dropped blood everywhere his hands had gone for the past minutes. Angie’s vitals weren’t smiling in the slightest, her moments of consciousness getting shorter and shorter each time she couldn’t tolerate what he was pulling her through. It was for her good, only for her survival chances not to plummet to the ground.

He was getting there too: he had removed the bullet in her abdomen and patched that up with some membranes they miraculously had packed in (which, considering they had suspected PGS, didn’t make a lot of sense; but Angie still put them in just in case they’d face Deftera or Tetarti). He was on his way to removing the second one, even if his hands weren’t steady anymore and his vision was turning into a guessing game if he didn’t spend a few long seconds focusing on one object. Still, adrenaline was keeping him running, anxiety and fear of death ringing behind his eyes and in all of his nerves, so he’d manage.

Not like he had a choice anyway.

 “…He’s not woken up yet,” Leslie finally says with a heavy sigh and her hands twitching right under Angie’s gaze. “Tyler was supposed to operate on him, but he broke down when realizing how bad the damage was.”

 Leslie was tenser than ever as she presided to the pre-operation conference with Tyler and Sidney. The nervous glance the former was darting towards the latter just showed he knew how wrong the situation was before she could even speak up about it. She had always hated being a bird of bad news; this wouldn’t change today.

“The patient is a twenty-seven-year old man who got shot twice in the abdomen. The bullets don’t seem to have hit anything major, only grazed them. The few things we need to be wary about are the high risk of internal and external haemorrhage, along with the possibility of him being afflicted with PGS happening as the patient previously contracted GUILT, these being Kyriaki and—”

“The fuck is that, Les’?!”

 Tyler’s voice was oddly serious. The death stare he gave her made her legs shake and her arms shiver further than they had done when she had first learnt of the situation.

“W-what do you mean?”

“The patient’s name! It’s… It’s some kind of sick joke, right?! That has to be!”

“There are no “jokes” of any kind here, Dr Chase,” Sidney intervened. “If we don’t operate immediately, he’ll die. Get ready right now.”

“…Of course, Director.”

 “So… Then… is Derek…?”

Her colleague takes time to find a way to answer. Her chest seems to weigh like lead threatening to snap the rope keeping it standing. During their few years working at the same place against the same threats, she doesn’t remember having seen Leslie this stressed, this anxious about anything, especially not when the life of someone they both knew was the matter. Then again, Angie wasn’t in the USA, when Caduceus Europe had to break terrible news to their American counterpart. She was right there, in the middle of the panic and the tears she didn’t want to spill. And even then, even when remembering how nauseous she’d get just thinking about what could be happening to him, what could happen would Naomi be unable to save the day —

Even with all of this considered, right at that moment, Angie feels like she’s just opened Pandora’s Box.

 Tyler had tears flowing down his face, hands trembling, as he painfully removed the second bullet. It was the first time she had ever seen him in such a state, at least, the first time since Amy had gotten saved by, well… the very man they were currently trying to save, whose vitals kept trying to plummet to the ground as they watched the blood they were transfusing into his veins pour right out of the wounds. The syringe he was holding with unstable fingers had just hit the ground, breaking in a thousand shards and splattering some stabilizer around the crash site.

“What’s wrong?” She asked. Not that she didn’t have her own idea as to what was going so awfully incorrectly at the moment, but she was still surprised by how distressed Tyler was. For such a naturally talented surgeon to panic this way…

“I-I don’t know!!” He screamed, breathing hitching, hands crimson. I just… I just…”

 Before he could put an end to his stuttering, a new party entered the room, dressed in scrubs and already grabbing the forceps on the surgical tool tray.

“Step aside and calm yourself down, Dr Chase. I’ll take care of it.”

He gulped, but nonetheless, Tyler stepped back from the operation table, right as she moved to dry his tears with a tissue.

“I’m sorry, Doctor, I don’t know…”

“Enough, we’re running out of time. Please monitor the vitals for me, that’s all I ask.”

“Will do, Doctor.”

“Leslie, get a syringe of stabilizer ready”.

“On it, Doctor.”

 Dr Hoffman’s arrival changed the air in the OR from desperate to tense and solemn. There simply was the feeling he’d manage to pull a miracle like Derek had done so before their eyes before. In a heavy and serious tone, one that didn’t betray any panic whatsoever, he ended the conversation:

“Let’s save him, once and for all. Failure isn’t an option.”

 “If it wasn’t for Dr Hoffman stepping in, we’d have lost Derek. I honestly never saw Tyler gets this wound up by anything in the OR like that before…”

“That must have been terrifying to see…”

“And it was! We went over it after the operation was over, and he confessed to me he couldn’t seeing him that way. Makes me wonder how you pulled through him getting infected with GUILT…”

 Sidney suddenly entered the room, almost as suddenly as everyone was convoked here, his workplace phone in hand, eyes sombre behind his glasses reflecting part of the neon lights of their lounge. It had been a slow day until now as the GUILT epidemic had been mostly subdued, leaving them with the wiggle room and luxury to wait for a patient to come in; even if that didn’t make any of them think any less of how odd it was for them to be called here so brutally. Still, from the corner of her eye, Leslie noticed something else that was weird: Victor was there too.

Victor, who never came out of his laboratory unless forced to, was there with us, crossing his arms as he walked behind Sidney and laid back against the wall. From the gazes she exchanged with Tyler, she knew he found it suspicious too. If even Victor was there, it meant Sidney was more than deadly serious about this.

 “Is everyone here yet?”

“Victor was the last person we were waiting on,” Stephen said from behind Sidney, even if the questioning expression in his eyes and on his face indicated he must have been as clueless as they all were.

“Good,” he replied as he came closer, putting his glasses back on the bridge of his nose. “Everyone, if I have gathered you all here on such a short notice. However, what I have to tell you is too urgent not to.”

“And what’s that urgent thing?” Victor asked.

“I got a call from Caduceus Europe.”

 The sheer idea of their European counterpart contacting them now, right as they had both Derek and Angie there, and prompting Sidney to call them all in was rising all the possible red flags it could. The air got tenser with just a sentence.

“And what for?” Tyler reacted with a nervous grin on his face. “Miller can’t have possibly called you just for a hamburger recipe.”

“Would you mind taking this seriously, Dr Chase?”

“S-sure.”

“As I was saying, a few minutes ago, we got a call from Caduceus Europe. They were asking for your permission to proceed with a GUILT intervention.”

“Why didn’t they just ask Stiles to do it then?” Victor chimed in again. “He has his own agency, doesn’t he? No need to ask us all for that kind of stuff.”

“That’d be because Derek is the patient.”

The news cut through the air like a hot blade through glass.

“…You’ve got to be shittin’ us,” was all that any of them said about it, courtesy of Victor.

 “I wasn’t the one operating on him directly, that must have been how… It wasn’t any easier on the nerves, that much I can tell you…”

“I’m sure it was. We were all tense that day, too… Tyler kept asking me if he’d be fine. We really weren’t sure if Dr Kimishima could… That’s her name, right?”

“It is.”

“So, yeah, we weren’t sure at all, so we all were super stressed until Sidney told us it’d be all okay…”

 The door to their lounge opened again. As soon as it did, Tyler jumped up from the couch, Leslie following shortly after. Victor tried his hardest not to look like he was somewhat concerned. Appeared before them their director whom, by the look of the traits on his face, was less tense than he had been around thirty minutes before. God had time been slow and cruel on their hands…

“How���s Derek?!” Tyler immediately interrogated, running on legs that had previously trembled under the weight of his worries.

“He’s made it. Barely, shall I add, but he made it. The operation was a success.”

A collective sigh of relief happened as Tyler’s legs buckled up again, with Leslie barely managing to catch him before he’d have hit the floor. They didn’t lose anyone today and, in the end, that was all that mattered, right?

 “Still, with how anxious Tyler was back then, it’s no wonder why he lost his composure when it seemed like there’d be no end to it.”

Angie’s breath caught up in her throat. The painkillers had subdued enough for her consciousness to be back to its usual sharpness, even with the lingering rests of lethargy from blood loss. The IV in her wrist was just the physical manifestation of that.

“…what do you mean by that, Leslie?”

Her workmate’s shoulders tensed as she looked away, pinching her lips, before sighing.

“We…”

 “We underestimated the extent of his injuries…!” Leslie yelped as Tyler’s hands had managed to take out one of the bullets.

“J-Jesus Derek, how could you have still been conscious when there was that in your chest?!”

They both stared, dumbfounded and terrified, at the hole very much close to the heart still bleeding under their watch.

“It grazed the aorta… If it had been a little closer….”

“…he’d have been dead on arrival, yeah. Let’s… Let’s remove that bitch…”

Tyler’s voice sounded hesitant and about to let a sorrow escape.

 The operation continued on with the smell of blood and gunpowder filling the atmosphere of the room. Both were too focused and with too much pressure on their shoulders to let that hinder them in their mission, even if she could notice her surgeon’s grip getting looser by the moment.

“Vitals dropping!”

“I don’t have the time for that bullshit! Inject stabilizer yourself!!”

Without a word, Leslie did as told and grabbed the syringe.

“That… That fucker just had to use his fancy voodoo powers before passing out, didn’t he…?”

“How would you even know that…?”

A familiar beep resounded again.

“V-vitals dropping!”

“…yeah, that.”

 Still, his pupils regularly darted to the screen displaying the vitals. Sweat drops flowed profusely all over his face, more than any other person she had ever assisted before. The more tranquil aura he gave off compared to the failure-paranoid Derek was nowhere to be seen…

The forceps almost fell into the body when it slipped from his hands, the second bullet escaping his grasp and landing near the aorta yet again. Breathing quickening, almost wheezing, he fixed his mistake with a display of cracking down under the fears piling up on his mind. Tears started flowing down from his eyes as the vitals continued falling and falling, the third bullet still doing its damage…

 “Oh my God…” Angie doesn’t have the words. She really doesn’t.

“Turns… Turns out he got shot four times. Your assailant had six bullets on him and they all hit.”

“That’s…” Her throat was knotting on itself. “That’s…”

A memory suddenly hit her.

“Wait, Leslie. You mentioned Tyler supposed Derek had used his Healing Touch on me, right?”

“Yeah. I’m still sure it’s just a hunch he had, but he did. I think it’s because he panicked when realizing the vitals kept dropping further and further.”

“It’s not just that. At least, I think it isn’t… I’m certain he did use it.”

“Why would Derek even do that? He was already injured as it is, he was lucky he didn’t pass out here and there to begin with!”

“…I suspect it’s because he… knew that.”

Her colleague stood there, dumbfounded, before her eyes grew wide and she almost bit her hand in realization.

 Oh no, no, not now! It wasn’t time to pass out, not yet. Angie still needed him, he had to stay awake! Issue was, even with all the determination in the world, it seemed like he wouldn’t have the time to… That’s right! Time! He was one of the few people on Earth who could play around with its flow. All he had to do to save Angie was to draw a star and focus hard enough with what was left of his adrenaline and clarity of mind to finish the operation or, at least, what he could finish of it.

Success: time was now going at quarter of its speed. He saw everything, now: how to remove the second and last bullet, how fast he could put on the membrane and seamlessly apply it to the injured flesh with the gel, how to give Angie her dignity back now that he’d finished on her. She’d be fine, she’d be fine; he was hearing the sirens coming their way, seeing the blue lights blinking.

 However, as soon as the distortion of time started fading, he felt all of his energy crash back. The world started spinning as he finished zipping her dress close, his hand giving up halfway through as it went limp and his other was too focused on rubbing his eyes under his glasses. Something drops from his mouth yet again.

It was no use resisting. The world span and span around him, blurring into one vague landscape of blacks and blues, the sounds gathering together to form a cacophonic white noise looping in the back of his mind. With the tools falling from his hands, he all but crashed on his patient, workmate and best friend all at once, eyelids fluttering as the black spots invading his sight made themselves more and more invasive.

When time resumed its course, all Derek could sense was the darkness of his vision, the coldness of his skin and the taste of copper in his mouth.

 “I mean, I’ll believe you on that one, you know him and his process much more than I do…”

To be frank, after telling all of this to Leslie, Angie just wants to cry. This has all been a terrible, atrocious, hideous mess and she’d have liked it to remain buried inside her mind.

“He’s such an idiot…! He could’ve died, and yet…. And yet he still operated on me!”

Leslie remained silent, but gave her a candid smile and handed her a handkerchief.

“That’s Derek for you… I’ve heard he tried not to make you worried when he got infected a few months back too.”

“That… didn’t really work,” she remarks with a soft of snicker in her voice. “He’s such an idiot… Sometimes, I wonder what stupid things he’d do if we weren’t there…”

“Saving you, it seems. He realized his wounds were less deep than yours.”

“…where is he, by the way?”

“Wait, you haven’t guessed yet?”

 Leslie seems genuinely surprised, even if her astonished expression soon gets replaced with her usual amused smile and bright eyes.

“He’s behind the curtain,” she replies as she points to the item in question with the tip of her thumb.

Angie’s entire face suddenly catches on fire and her weakened condition almost makes her head go for a spin.

“Oh God… Has he woken up yet?!”

“If he wasn’t before, I don’t think he could sleep through all of this for much longer, y’know.”

 Tyler’s voice suddenly rises in the room as his hand draws the curtain open. He gets up from a chair sitting by another bed with that dumb grin of his brightly plastered on his face.

“Geez are you ladies noisy…!”

Dumbfounded, embarrassed and relieved all the same, Angie just stares in complete silence. Leslie giggles under her breath.

“But hey, at least you’ve almost awoken my patient by doing that! That guy’s been sleepin’ for the past few hours!”

Leslie and he exchange a glance, a smirk on both of their faces.

“I think we should leave the both of you alone,” she then adds. “Just be careful about your injuries, okay, Angie? You’re the more reasonable of the two on that front, so I trust you with handling them properly… If you need help, don’t hesitate ringing for a nurse!”

On that, the both of them leave, and she isn’t sure what to make of it all.

 However, Angie has always been a worrywart, she knows that very much, so she still tries getting up from bed. It’s difficult and taking her ages since her legs feel so fragile and her wounds bother her, her shoulder still feeling very much sore. She pulls through the annoyances anyway, rising to her feet while supporting himself with the wheeled IV stand by her left side, gradually making her way to the other bed in the room and sitting on the chair still left warm by Tyler’s presence. Seems like he was there for quite a long time too…

Unlike whatever movie was playing back in her head, her eyes soon lie upon a peacefully sleeping Derek, whose face is still a bit too pale to her liking. She goes as far as to making sure he is doing as fine as she’d like him to: his chest is rising and falling steadily, calmly; his breathing is stable, only needed to be helped a little by the pipe in his nose; his vitals are doing just fine on the screen next to the bed beeping regularly.

Life suddenly sounds very peaceful.

 Right as she settles into the seat, putting the pillow she’s borrowed from her bed on it, Derek stirs awake. It’s his eyelids slowly fluttering back open at first, then a little cough, and finally his vision coming to be, eyes locking into hers. He looks somewhat different without his glasses: even if she’s seen him before without them, it’s still an odd feeling to get, somewhat like an uncanny valley effect. They smile to each other.

“A-Ang…?” His voice is hoarse, which was predictable considering the extent of the trauma his body must have taken.

“That sure is me. How are you feeling?”

“I guess… not worse than when I got GUILT…?”

She’s heard something like that before, albeit differently…

 Right as she settled into the seat, her folder still clenched against her chest, Derek stirred awake. First his eyelids slowly fluttered back open, then it was a little cough escaping his mouth, and finally his vision came to be as his eyes locked into hers. He did look somewhat different without his glasses: even if she had seen him before without them, the time he had spent three days in bed sleeping coming to her mind first, it was still an odd feeling to get, somewhat like an uncanny valley effect. She smiled to him.

“A-Ang…?” His voice was hoarse, which would obviously happen considering the extent of the trauma his body had been put through.

“That sure is me… How are you feeling?

“…like trash… To say I’m putting patients through that…”

“It’s for their good. It was for yours too.”

“I suppose you’re right, Angie…”

 With relief washing all over her, she put her free hand hand on his, mindful of the IV inserted in his wrist.

“What about you never do that again? I told you that was suspicious!”

“I gotta listen to you more often… How are you…?”

He asked that before too. How are you, Angie?, when she wasn’t the one who had gotten infected by a bioweapon. That man has the most skewed priorities of them all, she swears…

“I’m doing just fine. Thank you very much for saving me, Derek. Still, if you could not die on us again, it’d be appreciated.”

He snickers. “You’re welcome…”

 Still, and even with her greatest efforts, Angie feels tears running down her cheeks and wetting something under them.

“What’s wrong…?” He asks, concern lacing his tired voice.

“I… I got so scared I’d lose you!! W-when I saw you operating on me, I… I…. I wondered why you were doing this instead of sparing your energy!”

“I’m a doctor, Angie… I save people, so I saved you. I… couldn’t just sit there and watch you bleed out, in pain…”

“But you were injured!”

“And so were you… Everything’s fine, now, right? I’m here, you’re here…”

She sniffles her sorrow back in and tries giving him a smile, rubbing the early tears away from her eyes.

“You… You’re right. Everything’s fine now.”

That grants her a smile.

“Good…”

Still holding his hand, they fall into a comfortable silence, her arms resting on his mattress.

 For now, there’s no point in looking back at the past and remembering how terrible things can get. She can, at least for a moment, let go of all of her fears and remain serene, in the safety of a haven she keeps rediscovering, by the side of her favourite person. There’s nothing quite like the calm that comes after a violent, red-tinted storm, nothing quite the reassurance that comes after getting terrified and nothing quite the sun which makes rainbow after the rain has stopped pouring down.

Truly, sometimes, life can be merciful and full of light, as long as it wants to shine…