#'im trying to slow down' ​i say after posting several other pictures today

[xmoonlitxdreamx]

experimenting w using a thin brush for doodles to try to force myself to slow down a little while drawing (?)

[godidfk]

I Don’t Need A Hero (Part Two)

Summary: You don’t like heroes. They were a sham. But when your quirk disappears you are shocked to find you need them more than you thought. One in particular more than others. 

Pairing: Eijirou Kirishima x Reader

Warnings: Angst but like? Not really? 

Word Count: ~ 3.3K

A/N: okay listen im sorry this took seven years to come out lol. Life is life. I know there’s some confusion on what the readers quirk is but like I promise there will be a more in depth explanation soon. My asks are always open if you have questions!! I hope y’all like this. 

I’m gonna tag everyone who asked for part two on the last post! Just in case y’all forgot <3 (if that’s not okay lemme know I’ll untag you)

@lady-bakuhoe @shania-chua @raekah @onegaisobaniite @red-riot-girl642

Part One

“So what happened with Chargebolt?” Once you were both back to your car, you finally felt comfortable enough to ask Molly about what had happened at the meet and greet.

“Oh y/n! Oh, it was absolutely amazing! I kept peeking around the girl in front of me when I got up close, and he totally caught me looking. I was so embarrassed, he just kind of stared at me and I felt like I was on fire. He smiled at me and then he winked and I felt like I would pass out on the spot.” Glancing over, you saw Molly was absolutely glowing. Her hands were flying everywhere to emphasize how excited she was. You chuckled looking at her. “That’s not even the best part though y/n! When I finally got my turn to go up to him, he asked my name and told me I was really cute and asked if I’d stay after so I could talk to him more!” Your jaw dropped as Molly went on. You knew your best friend was drop-dead gorgeous, and the best person in the world. But who would’ve ever guessed her all-time favorite pro would be immediately taken with her? 

“Molly! That’s amazing! But... it didn’t take you long to come out and find me after..” realizing what your friend must’ve done you felt a wave of shame and guilt wash over you. “Molly please tell me you waited for him. Please don’t say you left to come find me instead.” The guilty look she threw you made your stomach sink. 

“It’s not like that y/n. I did wait. I figured since I sent Red Riot after you that you’d be alright waiting a little longer. I knew you’d kill me if I didn’t wait for him. So I did! But I definitely left quicker than he would’ve liked… BUT guess what!” Before you could get a word out she interrupted you. “Kaminari and I are getting together tomorrow after his patrol! As long as you’re alright that is.” She looked over at you and you could briefly see that worry back there. 

“Kaminari huh? Looks like you two got close real fast. I told you he’d love you! And Molly… I’ll be okay. It’s just going to take some time right?” That’s what you were hoping. That your quirk would be back in the morning. Or that you’d figure out what had happened. 

“Y/n, you never told me exactly what happened back there. Why can’t you hear anything anymore?” 

“It was weird Mol. You know how I hate being deep in the city like that. Around so many people. Their thoughts were so loud. It was starting to become too much. I pushed through though. For a bit. I was determined to be with you when you met him. Although it turns out you didn’t really need my help did you?” Throwing a quick glance over your shoulder you saw her blush. “Anyway, when we got into that line and Chargebolt came out it got so loud. I was about to excuse myself for a moment when… I don’t know. Everything was too much and then I saw him looking at me and all of a sudden… nothing. I totally freaked Mol. The silence was so loud. I felt like I was drowning in it. So I went outside. And then that stupid hero tried to come to my rescue. Who does he think he is anyway? He doesn’t know me. What could he possibly do to help?”

“Wait back up, are you telling me when you looked at Red Riot it all went silent?” Molly was staring at you with her eyebrow quirked. 

“Yes. That is exactly what I’m telling you. What’s your point?” 

“Well, that seems… sort of like something you would read in a romance novel doesn’t it? Young pretty girl looks at hot young man and all the voices in her head go silent? Sounds kind of dreamy to me.” Glancing over at her, you noticed she was wiggling her eyebrows at you. 

“Molly this is serious! My quirk is straight-up gone and all you can think about is some dumb fantasy? Even if it was some weird ‘hey this guy is your soulmate’ kind of thing you know me better than that. Never a hero. Never. But that’s beside the point! Molly, it’s gone and I can’t hear what anybody is thinking now. As nice as it is to get some peace for once in my life my spatial awareness is so fucked up. Normally I can tell when people are close to me without seeing them. Some asshole back there slammed into me and knocked me down and I didn’t even know he was there until I was on the ground. I have no idea what’s wrong with me and I’m scared, Molly.” She had gone silent beside you. The drive back to your house felt like it was taking years instead of an hour. 

“I’m sorry y/n. You’re right. I should be taking this seriously. We’ll figure this out. Do you want to go see a doctor? Maybe they’ll be able to find something wrong?” 

“Molly if I went to a doctor I’d be a guinea pig. Have you ever heard of someone’s quirk disappearing? Because I haven’t. I’ll figure this out. I’ll be okay. I couldn’t control my quirk very well anyway, right? Who needs it.” But the truth was you were terrified. You felt wrong. Empty. The quiet was so loud. 

-----------------------------------------------------

It had been a week since then. As much as you were hoping your quirk would be there when you woke up. It wasn’t. Everything was still quiet. If you were being honest though, after the first few days of being absolutely terrified and feeling helpless and empty, you were starting to enjoy the quiet. It was nice to hear the birds all of the time instead of only when you were 100% alone. Getting used to having to pay attention to your surroundings had been a challenge. And your job performance was taking a severe hit. Having to wait for people to actually tell you their order before you could start making it made things take a bit longer than you’d like. You were about to start getting ready for work when your phone rang. Walking over to pick it up from the counter you saw Molly’s contact picture and answered.

“Y/n! Are you busy right now?”

“Actually yeah. I was just about to get ready for my shift at the cafe, why?”

“Oh dangit. Kaminari is coming over today and I was hoping you would come meet him.” Molly had been talking to the pro hero every day since meeting him. She practically saw him every day too. You knew it was only a matter of time before she wanted to introduce you two. You were thankful to have work as an excuse to put it off. As much as you loved her, you weren’t ready to try and befriend a pro hero. 

“I’m sorry Mol. We’ll meet eventually I’m sure. I have to go get ready now but have fun! Don’t get zapped.” You heard her start laughing as you hung up. 

----------------------------------------------------

A few hours into your shift things started to slow down. You relished the time when the cafe was empty. It gave you a chance to catch up but also admire the view outside. The little cafe you worked at was on the outskirts of the city. Right across from a nature park that was empty more often than not. You loved to look out at the trees and flowers when you got the chance. It’s where you spent your lunch breaks too. Which you decided to do right now. Telling your coworker to man the front, you grabbed your lunch and crossed the street. Laying under your favorite tree you decided to try and figure out what had made your quirk disappear. This had become a daily thing. Taking about 30 minutes to try and piece it together and then pretending it didn’t exist the rest of the time. It had become the best way for you to manage it. Unfortunately, you weren’t any closer to an answer as you were when it happened. You were running out of theories. 

Thirty minutes passed by and you slammed shut your notebook and headed back to the cafe frustrated. You didn’t particularly notice the customers who were in the shop as you went into the back and put your things away. 

“Hey! I’m back from lunch if you want to go take your break!” Your coworker was smiling at you just a little too widely for your liking and you cursed your quirk for disappearing. “Why are you looking at me like that? Is there something on my face?” 

“No there’s nothing on your face. You didn’t tell me you knew Red Riot!” You felt heat rush to your cheeks. How did your coworker even know you had met Red Riot? 

“What are you even talking about? I met him last week and promptly told him to leave me alone. I don’t really consider that knowing someone. How did you even know about that?”

“Well if that’s the case, it looks like someone doesn’t know how to listen. I’m gonna go on my break but I expect all the details when I get back!” She wiggled her eyebrows at you as she pushed past you into the back room. Why did what she said make your stomach do a flip? Peeking around the corner into the shop you caught a glimpse of someone sitting right at the counter. He was drinking coffee and looking at his phone, occasionally looking around. His red hair was spiked up the same way it had been when you had met. But he wasn’t wearing his hero costume. Just a normal t-shirt. He looked surprisingly more human this way. Why the hell was her here though? No pros came to this shop. Favoring the fancier shops in the city. You weren’t complaining about that though. You preferred the quiet nature of this place. Taking a deep breath you walked out to the counter. He looked up as you walked out and his face lit up. His smile was bright. It reminded you of the sun. Shaking your head you tried to rid your mind of any thoughts about him other than what he was doing here. 

“So what, pro heroes are stalkers now?” You cringed internally at how rash that had sounded. He may be a hero but he didn’t deserve immediate cruelty. His smile dropped off his face for a moment before turning into a smaller smirk. 

“Denki told me the coffee here was really good, and that you made it the best. So here I am.” His smile grew a little wider as he spoke. You noticed his teeth were pointed and looked razor-sharp. Like a shark. 

“Well, that’s amusing considering I’ve never met him and he most certainly hasn’t been here while I was working.” He furrowed his eyebrows at that. Before he could think too much on it you had a realization and interrupted him.

“How did he tell you? Was it in person?” He looked up at you, clearly confused. 

“No, he texted me an hour ago, why?”

“Molly… that asshole. She’s been with him all day. I’d be willing to bet it was her not him. She isn’t particularly happy with me for the way I treated you last week.” You looked at him apologetically. 

“Well, that’s okay. You were obviously going through something. Even if it wasn’t Denki, the coffee here is definitely worth it. Why isn’t this place more popular?” You chuckled at that. 

“You think that coffee is good? Molly wasn’t lying. We do it pretty well here, but I make it best. What’s your order, I’ll make you another.” He smiled at you and told you his order. You quickly went about making it. Catching him smiling as he watched you from the other side of the counter. You were going to kill Molly later. But for the moment you completely forgot he was a hero. Just enjoying that bright smile. You placed his coffee in front of him and watched as he tipped it back. He closed his eyes for a moment before he spoke. 

“That is on a whole different level than the one the other girl gave me. How did you do that?” He was staring at you with wide eyes. You laughed at the face he was making. 

“I guess I’m just that good. I’ve been doing this for a while, you tend to pick up on little things after time.” You smiled as he took another, longer drink. He looked happy. He looked up at you and caught you smiling. 

“That looks good on you you know. You have a really nice smile. I’m glad I finally got to see it.” Heat rushed to your cheeks as he looked to you. Thankfully at that moment a customer came in and walked up to the counter. You cleared your throat and internally begged your face to cool down. 

“Hi! What can I get for you?” You recognized the customer, but you didn’t remember his name. 

“You have to ask? Thought you had everyone’s orders memorized by now. You usually start on it right as I walk in. Are you alright?” You felt guilty for having to lie to him. He wasn’t the first customer to ask though. So you automatically launched into the story you had made up to tell them all. 

“I’m sorry! I was in an accident last week and I’ve been having some memory issues ever since. I’m sure I’ll get back into it quickly! Just have to relearn everyone’s order.” You saw Red Riot look up at you and furrow his brow when you said that. You silently prayed he wouldn’t ask you about it. 

“I’m sorry! I’m sure you’ll get back into it in a jiffy. You’re everyone’s favorite barista for a reason!” Your heart warmed a little at the praise. You gave a small smile to the customer. 

“So what can I get for you? And this is super embarrassing after all of that praise, but I’m afraid the memory loss may have also caused me to forget your name.” The customer quirked an eyebrow at that. You had never really had to remember anything about your customers. Whenever they came in they were always thinking about their orders, so you heard them fresh every day. You had always heard their names before they said them too. Why would you take the time to remember it when the information was always immediately available to you? You missed this aspect of your quirk. Not being able to hear what everyone was thinking all of the time had its downfalls. 

“The name is Everett. I’ll have a double espresso please.” You immediately started making his drink as quickly as possible, hoping to make up for your lack of quirk. Behind you, you heard a very audible gasp. 

“Are you Red Riot? The pro hero?” Hearing the redhead chuckle you felt your heart drop. You had let yourself forget for a moment that he was a hero. All of the nice things he had said to you began to feel like a dagger in your chest. You would never allow yourself to befriend a hero. Finishing Everetts drink you turned and went to hand it to him and saw he was now deep in conversation with the pro. You weren’t listening to the conversation. You didn’t care to hear about the nonsense heroes and their fans talk about. 

“Here you go Everett. Hope it makes up for all of my issues.” You smiled at him and went to turn around to clean the counter when you heard him say your name. 

“Doesn’t y/n make the best coffee? I’m not surprised that a pro finally made their way to this place. It’s amazing it has stayed as quiet as it has this long.” Red Riot smiled and looked up at you. 

“The coffee is absolutely amazing. It’s like a dream. I have a feeling I’ll be here pretty often.” Your heart sank even further and you frowned. Turning to clean up your station, determined not to turn back around unless you absolutely had to. You heard the bell at the door and glanced over to see Everett leaving. 

“What happened to you last week?” You closed your eyes and sighed.

“That’s none of your business Red Riot.” You said it harshly. More harshly than you meant to. But you were hurt. Why would the world bless a hero with a smile as bright as that? 

“Please call me Kirishima. Everyone else calls me by my hero name. It’d be nice if you didn’t. And look I know last week is obviously a sensitive subject, but if it was bad enough that you’re having memory issues you should’ve let me help you. What if I could’ve prevented it?” Your entire body immediately felt like it had been lit on fire as the anger flooded your veins. You turned and gave him a look that could kill. A look filled with cold, seething rage. 

“I do not need some hero to help me. My life is none of your business. Leave.” He looked taken aback by your words. 

“Why do you say it like that? Like it’s a bad thing? It’s okay to need help y/n. Everyone does.” You hated the way that your heart melted when he said your name. But much bigger than that you hated that he was a hero. You hated every word he said. You felt your body getting hotter when you heard the bell ring and heard Molly’s laughter coming in. She looked at you and it immediately halted. She ran behind the counter and looked from you to Red Riot. She pushed her way in front of you and grabbed your face. 

“Y/n. Y/n go home. Now. I’ve got the counter. Go.” Looking at her, she seemed to be the only real thing for a moment. Her words sank into your mind and you turned and left the shop without a word. 

----------------------------------------

Molly sighed as she watched you walk out. Thanking God she had convinced Denki to come to the shop. He was standing by the door still looking incredibly confused. Kirishima was staring out the door too. 

“I should have known better than to tell you to come here Kirishima. I’m sorry.” Molly put her head in her hands. Denki walked up to the counter quickly.

“You alright babe? What the hell just happened? She looked ready to kill someone. What did you say to piss her off Kiri?” Denki was looking from Molly to Kirishima. 

“I didn’t really say anything. She told a customer she was in an accident last week and that she was having memory problems. When he left I asked why she wouldn’t let me help her last week. And she just. She got so mad.” Kirishima looked back at the door. Molly sighed again. 

“Listen. It’s not my story to tell. Short and simple of it, y/n doesn’t like heroes. She hates the whole premise of you guys. Something major happened at the event. Don’t ask me about it. It’s really not up to me to tell you. I’ve only seen her with that look one time before though… I’m just glad I got here when I did.” Molly had flashbacks to that night. Seeing your face then, seeing it now. It was too close. Way too close. Denki cleared his throat. 

“Do you even know how to make coffee?” Molly looked up at him confused. Realization set in and she laughed. 

“Denki I started here at the same time y/n did. We bought this place together. Even if it is just hers now. I’ve got the counter handled.” Both men looked up at you. 

“Wait you guys own this shop?” Kirishima looked around the place again as she continued to laugh. 

“It was always y/n’s dream to own her own cafe. Let’s just say dear old dad would do anything to keep me quiet about certain things. So I got her this place! It’s a long story. But when your dad’s a rich asshole there’s really only one benefit.” Denki raised an eyebrow at her. 

“Babe you’re so hot.”

“Oh my god, Denki. Not here.” Molly was laughing again. But she saw the way Kirishima was looking down at his cup. She pitied him. If only he hadn’t been a hero.

[helaintoloki]

apocalypse {f.h.}

pairing: number five x reader

warnings: death, some angst, lots of language

notes: trying to fight my writer’s block and finish pieces I’ve forgotten aha im posting this at midnight rn

/inspired by the song apocalypse by cigarettes after sex/

you’ve been locked in here forever and you just can’t say goodbye

your scraped knees and twisted ankle were the only things you could feel as you limped along the abandoned roads. they used to be a freeway, you think, but it’s hard to tell considering everything looks the same in the new post apocalyptic world: destroyed and desolate. death wasn’t a very good decorator, but it probably had other things on its mind.

today marked one week since the apocalypse had swept away any and all life from the earth, besides you, of course. somehow, you’d been (un)lucky enough to survive. who knew hiding in the dryer during a game of hide and seek with friends would pay off in the long run. and now, here you were, injured and alone-

“shit.”

or so you thought.

“hello?” you called out desperately, and the voice you had heard seemed to vanish in thin air. “i-i need help. my ankle’s twisted and i just need a place to rest.” nothing.

with a sigh, you sat yourself down amongst the rubble and pulled out your water jug from your flask. yet as you held it over your mouth you were met with nothing but air. only a few drops landed on your tongue, escaping the jug once you tapped the bottom with your palm. at this rate, you’d be dead in a few days. it’s almost impossible to survive the apocalypse on your own... unless you’re number five.

with a gun suddenly pointed at your face, a voice on the other end of the barrel demands, “who are you?”

“y/n,” you reply calmly, a sense of tiredness in your voice. he notices, but maintains his death grip on the weapon and his finger on the trigger.

“are you alone?”

“i was, then you showed up.” the boy, as you can tell by now, narrows his green eyes at you. “listen, if you’re gonna kill me, all i ask is that you do it quick. put me out of my misery.”

he’s quiet, his brows furrowed as he contemplates his next move. then, with the gun lowered, “i’m not going to kill you.”

“that’s too bad,” you reply calmly, setting your jug aside before letting your back rest against the piece of debris behind you. “guess i’ll let Mother Nature do it herself.”

“are you always this depressing?” he asks slightly annoyed.

“not usually, but when the world you once knew goes to shit... well,” you shrug, “people change.”

“self-pity isn’t a good change.”

“yeah, well neither is violence.”

“trust me, that’s the one thing that’s stayed the same,” he murmurs, almost as if he’s speaking to himself. his posture has relaxed significantly and the gun is on safety. “i’m Five.”

“well, Five, looks like it’s just you and me.”

~~~

it had been three years ago since you had first stumbled upon five, and since then you two had been inseparable. you were the apocalyptic duo (plus delores), and nothing could get in your way. in fact, it was safe to say you were in love with him, and unbeknownst to you, the feeling was somewhat mutual.

today had been like any other day. you’d woken up next to each other, eaten breakfast, gotten ready for the day, then continued your trek to god knows where. you sat in the wagon with Delores while five pulled, admiring the post apocalyptic beauty of everything around you. it was kind of poetic, really. how things seemed prettier when destroyed. or maybe you were just a big masochist. you wouldn’t be surprised after all the time you had spent with five.

“i’m hungry,” you stated aloud to no one in particular. “you hungry, Delores?”

“...”

“five, we’re hungry,” you chimed, causing him to roll his eyes in slight annoyance at your whining. honestly, he sometimes thought of you as a big baby he had to take care of. a small being who needed constant care and attention otherwise they’d die. but for some reason, five always took care of you. always. if he wasn’t such a tough guy, he’d consider it to be love. but to five, it was a silent agreement the two of you had come to; he’d take care of you and you’d make things less lonely. to five, this was enough. there was no place for love in the apocalypse.

“what do you want?” he grumbled, continuing to pull the weight of you and Delores as well as your few belongings within the wagon.

“hmm... spaghetti!”

“why do you two insist on making things so difficult?” five huffed, stopping for a moment to scan his surroundings. “i think there used to be a super market a few blocks from where we’re standing. they might have something there.”

the super market, once known as john’s grocery, was nothing but rubble and broken building, but a good survivor always knew not to judge a book by its cover, which is why you and five managed to find some pretty good shit. it wasn’t spaghetti, of course, but a can of Pringle’s and beef jerky sandwiches was like heaven to your rumbling tummies.

while Five was busy evenly splitting the sandwich Delores had so graciously offered to the two of you, you rummaged through your bag and pulled out your find: a Polaroid only slightly damaged from the blast. it only took a minute for you to insert the film and a few seconds to snap a photo of an unsuspecting five concentrating on the precision of slicing the sandwich.

“what the hell was that?” he asked, looking up at you and scowling slightly at the sight of the camera. he hated pictures.

“i found it,” you grinned, snapping another photo.

“Jesus, enough with that,” five scolded, blinded temporarily by the glare. “you’re going to get us killed.”

“no one’s out here, you’re being paranoid,” you said dismissively, smiling at the developed film. “besides, look at how adorable you look!”

five merely rolled his eyes and took a bite of his jerky sandwich. you were too trusting of the world, too naive. believing that no one could touch you, that nothing could go wrong. it’s what had gotten you killed.

it all seemed to happen in slow motion, really. one minute you’re smiling, the next there’s a bullet in your chest and you’re struggling to breathe. the blood is oozing freely from the wound, dribbling down from your mouth as you fall back with wide eyes and a terrified face.

“y/n!” five yells, not recognizing his own voice as he quickly scoops you into his arms and desperately clutches you to his chest. “shit, shit, shit.”

“five?” you gurgle, and his eyes begin to well with tears.

“you’re going to be okay, you’re going to be fine,” five repeats over and over into your hair, and he’s not sure if this mantra is for him or for you.

he feels the warm liquid spreading in between your bodies, staining his jacket and seeping through your clothing. it’s so warm, it scares him, scares him as if it’s the first time he’s seen blood in his life.

he’ll never forget the strangled cry that left his mouth as he felt you slump against him, the sudden chill he got from the cold of your body. it was what kept him awake for several nights, what kept him going, what caused him to go rouge when he had learned of the commission’s true power, their true crimes. the blood on their hands, your blood on their hands. they’d pay.

~~~

“shit.”

after explaining what was basic science to his now much older siblings and coming up empty handed in his search for caffeine, five hardgreeves decided to take a drive. a scrawny thirteen year old driving a car would have been comical if not for the situation and stakes at hand.

griddy’s is the only place he can think of to go for a decent cup of coffee, and he hopes it’s still there. and it is. it’s comforting to know that some things have remained the same since his departure into the future with you..

it’s almost empty when he walks in, except for a truck driver at the front and a girl at the very back in her own booth. books are scattered around her, a clear sign of procrastination. she reminds him a lot of-

“Y/N?” five asks bewildered. you peek up at the sound of your name, eyebrows furrowing in confusion at the sight of a stranger asking for you.

“do i know you?” you ask and shrink back against the booth as he approaches quickly. this boy you’ve never met before may be cute, but he’s approaching like a mad man.

“y-you’re here, you’re alive!”

“last i checked,” you say with an uneasy laugh. “h-how do i know you?”

“it’s a long story, i’ll explain it as we go home,” he rushes, grabbing hold of your wrist that you quickly pull back.

“go back?? i-i don’t know you!” you sputter. he sighs annoyed, impatient. he knows it’s not your fault that you have no idea who he is, but he doesn’t have a lot of time to waste.

the bells over the door chime, and five is on alert immediately. he thought he’d have more time before they found him.

“listen, i know you don’t know me, but i need you to get under the table right now, okay? you’ll be safe.”

you didn’t have time to protest as he was shoving you under. but as you watched the next scene unfold in front of you, you were suddenly very grateful you had chosen the corner booth that night.

[lovemesomesurveys]

How do you feel about full length beards? I’m not into a lot of facial hair. I like some scruff, but that’s it. Have you ever been to a circus? Yeah, once. I was naive and didn’t know about the abuse that went on at the time. Do you know anyone who’s gone to a Fat Camp? No. Do you use Facebook IM everyday? No. I don’t even remember the last time I used it. How many surveys have you done already today? This is my first.

What’s the WORST show on Adult Swim? I don’t care for the Adult Swim shows. Family Guy and American Dad is okay, but after that it gets too stupid and weird for me. Sorry. Like once I saw this show, Mr. Pickles, and uh... wtf. The episode I saw was very disturbing. I don’t get the appeal of Rick and Morty at all. And why the hell is Mike Tyson Mysteries a thing? That’s just to name a few. I see previews of other shows and I just... wow. Do you have any relatives that have shunned you, or vice versa? No. Has anyone ever posted a HORRIBLE picture of you for everyone to see? Not maliciously or because they thought it was horrible and wanted to embarrass me, but yeah. My mom has posted photos where she didn’t see anything wrong and she thinks I looked fine, but I was like EW NO take that down it’s hideous. I reallyyyy don’t like photos of me taken by someone else. I have to take my own photos if I’m going to take one at all because I know the angles and lighting and can add a filter. Plus, I can take a ton before finally settling on one. If someone else takes the photo and they want to post it, I have to approve. Which grade in school was the most fun for you? I enjoyed elementary and middle school. High school had its ups and downs, but there were parts I liked. I liked the last 2 years the best. Which would you rather have, a new puppy or kitten? I wouldn’t want another pet right now to be honest. We have our doggo and one suits our family best right now. Does drama seem to follow you everywhere you go? No, thankfully. I have other issues I struggle with, but not drama. Do you ever just want to go away to a new place where no one knows you? I don’t live in a small town where everyone knows everyone and I was never Miss Popularity, so apart from family and a few other people, not a lot of people know me. However, I do want move away to a new place. My family and I have wanted to for a long time, we just haven’t been able to. A change of environment and scenery would be really nice. You’re ordering a pizza, you can have any kind of toppings, what are they? I’m a simple gal, I just like white sauce, feta and ricotta cheese, garlic, spinach, and crumbled meatballs with pesto drizzled on top. Do you hit ‘quiet’ or ‘ignore’ on your cell? Which one usually? Nah. If my phone rings and I don’t want to answer it, I just let it ring. Do you ever regret giving your number to people? I have before with some people. Have you ever been told that you’re afraid of your own shadow? Haha yeah. Have you ever tried Gouda cheese? Nope. Does/did your high school have pop machines? No. They decided to remove them the year I entered high school, which I was mad about. Do you use a public computer, or do you have your own? I have my own laptop. Do you ever find it odd how you type LOL when you’re not really laughing? >> No, because I understand that its function has moved far beyond representing actual laughing-out-loud. <<< Yeah. I remember discussing that in a class once. Have you ever gambled? A couple times. Not my thing. Although, what really made my experience unenjoyable wasn’t so much the gambling, it was that the casinos I’ve been to allow smoking and I don’t do well with cigarette smoke. At all. It gives me a killer headache, makes my heart rate go up, and makes me feel dizzy and sick. It’s awful. The smell in the casinos was too overbearing for me, so I spent very little time inside. Do you know anyone who’s won the lottery? No. If you could work at any retail store, which one would it be? I really don’t want to work retail. And that’s not shade toward retail workers AT ALL. I salute you, honestly. You deal with a lot of shit. What’s the shortest you would ever cut your hair? I had a “bob” for a few years. Do you listen to any deathcore? No. Do you subscribe to any teen magazines? Which ones? No. I’m also 30 years old. Do you know someone who never smiles? Never? No. Has anyone ever made you feel uncomfortable at work? I’ve never had a job. Do you still watch South Park? I never did. I mean, I’ve seen bits here and there before because my brother used to watch it, but I was never into it myself. Tell me one movie you’ve seen recently that sucked: My mom, brother, and I recently watched this movie on Netflix called, The Platform. It had potential and was interesting at first, but the ending was just... no. It seemed abrupt and I was just really confused. Have you ever carved something into a dinner booth somewhere? No. When’s the last time you were carded at a bar? When I last went to the bar, which was almost 10 years ago. Do you smoke little cigars? Have you ever tried them? Nooo. You’re babysitting, what do you expect per hour for pay? Pfft, no I’m not babysitting. What’s the last thing you returned at a store? I very rarely return things so I have no idea. It’s been a long time. What’s the name of the last cat you pet? I don’t even recall the last time I petted a cat. Do you still look at clouds and make shapes of them? I haven’t in a long time. If you had to dye your hair for one year, what color would you pick? I already do, I dye it red. Who’s got your heart? Me. What’s your television addiction? I have several shows that I’m into. Have you ever stringed green beans before? No. What do you do to make yourself more relaxed when you’re nervous? It’s hard to calm myself when I’m anxious, but I try to distract by talking to someone, listening to ASMR, watching TV or something on YouTube, or reading.  Do you cook? If so, what’s the last thing you made? The only thing I cook is ramen. Oh wait actually I made a grilled cheese sandwich the other day. ha.  Have you ever had any painful dental work done? If so, what? Yeah, a few things. How do you usually spend your Saturdays? I spend all my days and nights the same, really. Do you make your own jewelry or clothing? Last year I briefly got into making beaded bracelets. I made a few. What’s your favorite thing to do when you’re bored? I do the same things everyday whether I’m bored or not: spend time on my social medias, watch YouTube, read, watch TV, scroll through Tumblr, do surveys, just lie there.... ha. Somedays just feel like they’re dragging and going by extra slow and the things I listed above that I like doing just don’t cut it so I just lie there mindlessly watching TV or go to sleep. Do you use drawing to describe what you’re feeling? No. Do you like the smell of new school supplies? As a kid I did. Like getting a new box of crayons. Do you give everything you do 100%? No. I certainly haven’t with life... Do you shop at any independent music stores? No. I don’t shop at any music stores. How do you feel about mainstream music? I like a lot of it.

What song lyrics describe your mood at the moment? *shrug* Do you have healthy eating habits? No. My eating habits are messed up. I have issues with appetite and other issues.

If you could transform into any kind of animal, what animal would you be? A dog. Are you superstitious? If so, what are you superstitious about? I do the knock on wood thing, but it’s just out of habit, really. If you could travel anywhere in the world where would it be? There’s so many places I’d like to visit. What food disgusts you the most? I don’t do seafood at all. What is your favorite thing to cook? Ramen. One place you would never want to get lost in in the dark? I wouldn’t want to get lost anywhere in the dark. :O Are you claustrophobic? Yes. What is your worst flaw? Oh where to start. One thing that always creeps you out? ALL bugs. What is your biggest fear? Losing loved ones, death, never getting better/getting worse, never doing anything with my life and just wasting away... If you could be reincarnated, would you come back as another human or an animal? If an animal, what kind? I don’t believe in reincarnation. Ideal way you’d like to die? Obviously painlessly, but jeez. If you could be roommates with anyone of your choice, who would you pick? I like living with my family. What is the most ridiculous thing you’ve ever heard? Uh, a lot of things. Your favorite kind of dog? I love doggos, but I definitely have a special thing for Labs and German Shepherds. Do you have any scars? If so, how many? I have a lot of scars. I’m not going to count them. What is your favorite scary movie to watch in the dark? I don’t watch them in the dark. Unless I’m at the theater, obviously. I love scary movies, though. Would you rather be buried or cremated when you die? Cremated. What is your favorite thing to drink? Alcoholic and non alcoholic? Coffee and Starbucks Doubleshot energy drinks. That’s also coffee, but you know what I mean. I don’t have a favorite alcoholic drink, I don’t drink. What is your favorite food around the holidays? I love either ham or turkey depending on the holiday and mashed potatoes with gravy, stuffing, and rolls. Easiest way to scare you? I’m such a jumpy, easily scarable (it’s a word, shh) person so you could really just say hi and I’ll jump. haha. Like my back faces my bedroom door and if I don’t hear anyone coming in or they just poke their head in to say something I’ll jump. lmao. Tell me one of your biggest secrets? Nah. What was your last nightmare about? It’s been awhile since I’ve had one, thankfully.

[dilfhakyeon-moved]

yO i was abt to write to you abt the new modc ep (what's going on with the weird cuts at the beginning jcbjfbjb im crying) but i saw your post so!!!! tell me abt your dream bro i wanna hear abt it!!!!!! -✨

OH I HAVENT SEEN IT YET RIGHT I FORGOT IT CAME OUT TODAY!!! Let me watch it then we can talk abt it !!

And well my dream is pp long so bear w me 😔 i don't have the 'read more' function on mobile so i apologise in advance for everyone who comes across this !! I'll edit the 'read more' into it when I can 😊 ( i hav edited it hehehehe )

SO . actually there are several parts to this dream and I woke up between the first two parts but ... YEA.

At first I was home but a cat had gotten inside my house, I already had two cats ( my current cat and the one that will have died one year ago exactly tomorrow... yes five days after my birthday december is a cursed month for me. but if u wanna know abt him just search 'tchoupi' on my blog ) and I don't think my girl was okay w that new cat ? also new cat looked wonky sjhsjsh ? I wasn't sure abt its behaviour bc it seemed like it cld get irritated fast. In the end my mother told me to throw it out so I did against my will but when I saw it walk away... it had a missing leg.... I was like oh shit dude no come back... so I went and opened the front door and it came back running !!! I couldn't leave it like that w/o food if it already was incapacitated in a way. so that was my new cat. everything ends well ( I'm pp sure I forgot a part of that part but it's not the one I'm interested in )

SECOND PART... THE CÅSTLË. i was in a castle that was more medieval than renaissance styled or whatever the fuck i didnt study architecture but yes this. it had a courtyard with a fountain and that courtyard had a beautiful view on The Unknown ( aka fields and forests and stuff yknow just. The view ) but there were also bridges ( not the rock kind the "we use it in movies to make a character dramatically fall after the villain cut the rope" kind ) and little paths to go to The Unknown. there was a built-in church ( not a christian but i guess that was a smart choice given most attendees were fire emblem characters and they were definitely christians ) and also stables i guess ? but the front stables were empty and i didn't get to see the actual stables. the front stables had a pathway going around them ( there was a front stable on the left and on the right, with the courtyard being a little pushed back ? like if you left the end of the stable pathway you were already past the courtyard )

so now picture all ot this but suddenly the sky is super dark and everything is grim and gloomy. like a typical halloween movie. everything that was neat feels now worn out and the pathways are definitely scary, nobody wants to go there !

i was looking for my friends ( aka mercedes from fire emblem three houses ) but somehow couldn't find them, a fight broke out between ingrid and annette ( also fire emblem three houses ) and i don't like rich horse girls nor do i like racists so i was about to beat ingrid's ass. this big dude comes in and threatens me so i scold him and he and ingrid both go away. i win. i talk to more people but they're all acting weird except annette i guess. whatever weirdos i'm out

next i keep looking, but now i'm not alone - i'm not sure of whether it's a real presence or just a spirit until the end of this sequence where this boy tells me where to go and what to do to fix things a little, so i go into both stable pathways and end up being possessed twice ( demonic possession isn't as bad as they tell you i turned out fine ) so when the boy tells me where to go next i'm like "are we getting possessed a third time ?" he chuckles. ( i am gay so that was cute )

but we don't get any time to do that third thing ! we get out of the pathways and everyone is planning to go fight whatever is beyond The Unknown ! i look at the boy and awake me now pictures him as kraam from the stranded. cool i have a nice partner in crime i'm okay with that. the others leave, there's a lot of them but a second group is getting ready ! so kraam-but-not-quite grabs my arm firmly but like he doesn't hurt me or anything and we start going into The Unknown as well. im like hey wtf do we do now. and he tells me oh these two groups are going mad that couldn't be us let's go find the stray kids ( awake me now realises this is ~cringe~ but dream me was like whoa a solitary group of ppl who fight bigger evils ! BC YES THAT WAS WHAT SKZ WERE DOING IN THIS DREAM but i never met them ) so we can join forces w them and defeat these ppl. i look back. i see the second group from afar bc they have torches. im like wow this is like beauty and the beast.

something happens, idk what, but kraam starts running ! i'm a slow runner so i thought oh fuck not again but i ran after him anyway, the next bit is us running through a sort of jungle ( the sky is clear again ) and like its CRAZY i fucking loved that bit bc WOO ADVENTURE !! ( im a sagittarius )

then we slip between two trees' leaves and end up in a facility. we keep running bc if we stay there We Will Die. suddenly i am slowed down ( which leads me to believe before that he was holding my wrist but released my wrist when he slipped between the trees ) but he checks on me which i appreciate because that means he would rather die with me than survive without me, romance luv

his father ! the bastard. tries to kiss me in front of his mother. im like lmao dude thats disgusting die n go to catholic hell. i push him away and tell him off, he gets pissed but i cant go look for kraam bc his brothers r telling me abt how we're gonna go on a road trip. im like ? the world is abt to end tho ? but apparently my dream rly wanted a drama plot so fine.

his brothers have, allegedly, caught on to an alleged potential relationship between us. no im not gonna complain abt it im lonely and sad and gay so my dream fills in for me. theyre talking abt how theres not enough room for all of us in the van unless i sit on kraam for the trip but they ( specifically the one brother who oddly reminds me of dbk rain ) somehow make it into a sexual joke ? being me tho i didnt get it KSBSKDH... they were like talking abt legs ?? i remember it was abt how it wouldnt work with smth with four legs 'unless i could go with three' and like i dont even know what the hell that was supposed to mean we're talking abt a van not a horse ygwim ?

idk if i woke up after that but my brain did picture both me complaining to kraam abt his dad doing that and him getting quietly angry and just telling me to not come close to him again just in case hed try it again AND the beginning of the 'road trip' where i was indeed using kraam as a seat. and i was sleeping bc idk maybe i was tired from the running ! i hope my next dream is the continuation bc boy that was a whole drama episode

also i gave up and started calling him just kraam but it wasnt kraam ofc he just had kraams face from what i remember ! but he wasnt kraam at all

[sleepinbird]

do all the "send me a number, yo" asks!!!!!

You got it dude.

Under the cut bc its long!

1: Let’s start with a tricky one; what is the real reason you are confused right now?I’m afriad that im making the wrong long term career decision. 

2: Do you ever get “good morning” texts from anyone?

No, but I wake up right next to her so we say it in person

3: If your significant other smoked pot, would you care?

Nah as long as she’s safe about it.

4: Do you find it easy to trust others?

Depends on the vibe I get from them.

5: What were you doing at 11PM last night?

Playing BOTW

6: You’re drunk and lost walking down the road; who is with you?

Hopefully my partner

7: What would you do if you found out you had been cheated on?

I dont even know. I would be so crushed and angry. 

8: Are you close with your dad?

Nope

9: I bet you kissed someone last night, right?

Yep! My girl.

10: What are you listening to?

My partner tapping her foot to music

11: You can only drink ONE liquid for the rest of your life - what is it?

Blue gatorade

12: Do you like hickeys?

Love ‘em

13: What time do you go to bed?

Between 1 and 3am

14: Is there someone who continuously lets you down?

Nah

15: Can you text as quickly with one hand as you do both?

Nope

16: Do you always answer your texts?

For the most part

17: Do you hate the person you fell the hardest for?

No. She’s the best thing thats ever happened to me.

18: When was the last time you talked to one of your best friends?

20 ish mins ago

19: Is there someone that makes you happy every time you see them?

Ye, my girl

20: What was your last thought before you went to bed last night?

“God my hip hurts”

21: Is anyone else in the room with you?

Yeah, several. I’m at school.

22: Do you believe what goes around comes around?

I hope it does.

23: Were you happier four months ago than you are now?

No. I was at the beginnings of a depressive episode.

24: Is there someone you wish you could fix things with?

Sorta?

25: In the past week, have you cried?

Yeah.

26: What colour is the shirt you are wearing?

Maroon.

27: Do people ever call you by your last name?

Nope.

28: Is anyone ignoring you right now?

Not as far as I know

29: Do you have a best friend?

Several

30: Would it be hard seeing someone else kiss the last person you kissed?

It’d be devastating considering I’m dating the last person I kissed.

31: Who was your last call/text message from?

Both from my Mom

32: Are you mad at anyone?

I’ll always be lowkey mad at my dad.

33: Have you ever kissed someone older than you?

Yes, once

34: How old will the last person you kissed be on his/her next birthday?

23

35: How many more days until your birthday?

87

36: Do you have any summer plans yet?

Work

37: Do you have any good friends of the opposite sex?

Ye.

38: Are you keeping anything from your best friend(s) now?

Nope

39: Do you have a secret that you’ve never told anyone?

I dont think so

40: Have you ever regretted kissing someone?

Lowkey, but not really.

41: Do you think age matters in relationships?

To an extent, yeah.

42: Are you available?

Nope!

43: How many people have you had real, strong feelings for since high school ended?

Since it ended? One. And Im with her now.

44: If you had to get a piercing (not ears), what would you get?

Probably a second lip piercing. Maybe tongue.

45: Do you believe exes can be friends?

Depends on the circumstances but yes.

46: Do you regret anything?

Yeah but not so much that I would want to go back and change it

47: Honestly, what’s on your mind right now?

My health

48: Did you ever lose a best friend?

I feel like I sorta half lost one. We still chat, but its not like it used to be and its probably my fault.

49: Was your last kiss a mistake?

Not at all.

50: Why aren’t you pursuing the person you like?

I already did and it was a success. : )

51: Has the last person you kissed ever seen you cry?

Several times

52: Do you still talk with the person you LAST kissed?

Every day

53: What was the last thing you ate?

Apple slice

54: Did you get any compliments today?

Not yet

55: Where are you going on your next vacation?

God I have no idea. Maybe Idaho Springs?

56: Do you own anything from other countries?

I mean most things are made in China so???

57: Are most of your friend guys or girls?

Most of them are outside the binary, but lean towards female.

58: Where have you lived most of your life?

Colorado

59: When was the last time you took a long drive?

Can’t remember

60: Have you ever played Spin the Bottle?

Nope

61: Have you ever TPd someone’s house?

Nope

62: Who do you text the most?

Either my Mom or my partner.

63: What was the last movie you saw?

Would You Rather

64: What’s preventing your current boyfriend/girlfriend from going back to their ex?

Idk, they love me I guess?

65: How many boyfriends/girlfriends did you have in 2011?

None.

66: Is the last person you kissed younger than you?

Yeah by like a year ish.

67: Do you curse around your parents?

I try not to

68: Are you happy with where you live?

Decently so. Its messier than I’d like, but 4 college students live there, so what can you do?

69: Picture of yourself?

Will post separately.

70: Are you a monogamous person or do you believe in open-ended relationships?

I prefer monogamy because I’m easily jealous, but under very certain circumstances, I’d be willing to try polyamory.

71: Have you ever been dumped?

Nah. 

72: What do you most like about making out?

Tongue ;P

73: Have you ever casually made out with someone who you weren’t seriously involved with?

Kissed, yes. Made out, no.

74: When you kiss someone for the first time, is it usually you who initiates it or the other?

I’ve only done it once, and I initiated.

75: What part of a person’s body do you find most attractive?

The crease where thigh meets butt, hands, neck, legs lol

76: Who was the last person you talked to last night before you went to bed?

My partner

77: Had sex with someone you knew less than an hour?

Nope

78: Had sex with someone you didn’t know their name?

Nope

79: What makes your heart flutter and brings a big cheesy smile to your face?

When I wake up to her smiling at me

80: Would you get involved with someone if they had a child already?

Depends on the age of said child

81: Has someone who had a crush on you ever confessed to you?

My current partner, yeah.

82: Do you tell a lot of people when you have a crush?

Nah, only like one person

83: Do you miss your last sweetie?

I always miss her 

84: Last time you slow danced with someone?

Probably about a month ago in our living room

85: Have you ever ‘dated’ someone you’ve never met?

Nope

86: How can I win your heart?

Someone already has it. But personality is everything.

87: What is your astrological sign?

Libra

88: What were you doing last night at 12 AM?

Getting ready for bed

89: Do you cook?

Not as much as Id like

90: Have you ever gotten back in touch with an old flame after a time of more than 3 months of no communication?

Not really an old flame, but an old friend yeah

91: If you’re single right now, do you wish you were in a relationship?

Not single

92: Do you prefer to date various people or do you pretty much fall into monogamous relationships quickly?

Monogamy

93: What physical traits do you look for in a potential interest?

Physical traits dont really matter. Its more a personality thing for me

94: Name four things that you wish you had!

A dick, the willpower to lose weight, a higher wage, another iced coffee

95: Are you a player?

Not really.

96: Have you ever kissed 2 people in one day?

I dont think so

97: Are you a tease?

Yeah, but only with her

98: Ever meet anyone you met on Tumblr?

I think so. Probably at a con

99: Have you ever been deeply in love with someone?

Currently am

100: Anybody on Tumblr that you’d go on a date with?

Only the gal Im currently dating

101: Hugs or Kisses?

Hugs

102: Are you too shy to ask someone out?

Most of the time yeah lol

103: The first thing you notice about the opposite sex?

Idk, voice? Smile?

104: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you babe?

Ye

105: If a sexy person was pursuing you, but you knew he/she was in relationship, would you go for it?

NOOOOOOOOO

106: Do you flirt a lot?

Kinda lol

107: Your last kiss?

My gal

108: Have you kissed more than 5 people since the start of 2012?

Nope

109: Have you kissed anyone in the past month?

Ye

110: If you could kiss anyone who would it be?

The girl to my left

111: Do you know who you’ll kiss next?

Absolutely

112: Does someone like you currently?

I hope so!

113: Do you currently have feelings for anyone?

Yes indeed

114: Do you like to be in serious relationships or just flings?

Serious only. I dont see the point in a fling.

115: Ever made out with just a friend?

Made out, no, kissed, ye.

116: Are you happier single or in a relationship

It depends. Id say Im happier with her than I have been in a great long while.?