#'if you want something done right you have to do it yourself'

[ao3commentoftheday]

I'm over 350k words into writing a very long fic that's about halfway done, and lately, I feel like quitting. I've considered posting the outline as a final chapter to give people closure and then just walking away from it.

But I also really want to be able to actually finish it because the story means a lot to me. Whenever I think about calling it quits, I can't do it.

I feel trapped between not wanting to work on it anymore and wanting to finish this story that I've already poured so much time and love into. I want to finish it as much as I want to quit. But the idea of going on is almost agonizing.

Part of why I've been wanting to quit is because my health went downhill about 8 months into working on it, and it has only got worse since then, and that makes chapters take a long time to finish. I'm very slow to update and it makes me feel bad for the readers who are waiting for more. It's not like that many people are waiting, there isn't too much pressure in that sense. It's a rarepair and the fandom isn't as active as it used to be. But there are some people who are excited to know what happens next, and I feel like I'm letting them down by taking so long. I'd probably let them down even more if I didn't write the rest of it, though.

Another reason I've been wanting to quit is that I've been working on this fic for a few years already and it's going to take a few more years to finish, and that is overwhelming. I'm exhausted from such a long commitment to something creative. I've never spent longer than 6 months on a fic before and didn't think this one was going to take so long.

The final reason is that my writing style has changed in small ways over the course of working on the fic and I feel like older chapters are not as good as the newer chapters and I'm sort of losing confidence in myself. I don't enjoy reading my old fics because all I see are the things I'd change, and I feel like that's starting to happen with this fic.

This is supposed to be fun and I'm not having fun right now.

I don't know what to do.

Do you have any advice?

*hugs* the first thing I want you to do, anon, is take a deep breath. hold it. let it out.

It's going to be okay. ❤️

You've got a lot of different emotions going on right now and a lot of different reasons for feeling them. You need to stop trying to push them away and "get on with things" because that's just like shoving your mess into the closet. Eventually that door isn't going to shut anymore.

You also need to take care of yourself before you worry about your readers. They'll still be there later. New ones might come by in the meantime. If you're putting your readers' presumed wants and needs ahead of your own, you'll eventually start to feel resentful towards them for "forcing" you to do something you don't want to (or just can't) do right now.

First and foremost, I think you need a break. You're exhausted and you're pressuring yourself to do more than you're capable of. The way you describe things, it sounds like you're pretty burnt out and in need of some recovery time. Berating yourself and forcing yourself and pushing yourself so hard is only going to make it all worse.

You know that old Snickers commercial where the person turns into an ogre or something and their friend gives them a chocolate bar? The tag line is something like "You're not you when you're hungry." Well, you're also not you when you're exhausted. Your brain is currently a toddler in need of a nap, and if it doesn't get that nap then it's just going to have a tantrum and ruin your whole day.

Take a moment and think of this story that you're writing. Why do you want to finish it? Is it because the readers are excited for it? Is it because you've put a lot of work into it already? Is it because you've already spent a lot of time on it?

All of those things might be true, but you said the most important part yourself, right up front, "the story means a lot to me. Whenever I think about calling it quits, I can't do it."

It's not about the readers, and it's not about the effort, and it's not about the time. It's about the story. That's the important thing. And if that's the important thing, then you can write it at your own pace. You can enjoy the writing process of it. You can spend your time imagining scenes that might or might not make it into the final version.

Writing fic is a hobby, and like you said it's meant to be fun. Take it off of your list of responsibilities and put it onto your list of daydreams instead. The only person you're accountable to with this story is yourself. The next time you catch yourself thinking, "I have to-" or "I should-" when you're thinking about this story, stop and recognize that thought. Where is it coming from? Why are you having it? Is it actually true or do you just feel like it is?

Then take a deep breath. Hold it. Let it out. This story is for you first. Take your time with it.

[nottsangel]

hiiii love ur work!!

if u can pleaseeeee write more about pervy coach! art,, need him like air,, need him to push me to my limit w training and then praise me for making him so proud 🥰🥰🥰

“i— i can’t anymore art, i’m too tired!” you cry out, panting as you run from side to side, trying to hit each ball art passes your way. you’d be lying to yourself if said you aren’t attracted to your coach— so you try to impress him every chance you can, pushing yourself to your limits and striving to improve, even if it’s just for a tiny bit of praise.

“oh, come on! you can do it, i know you can! five more minutes and then we’re done!” he encouragingly yells over the net as he serves another ball your way. he attentively watches you with his hand resting on his hip, closely observing your movements as you drag your feet over the court with the little energy you have. you barely hit each ball, but feel relieved that you’re at least still able to satisfy your coach.

“that’s it, we’re done!” the words coming from his mouth feel like a relief, causing you to instantly fall down to the ground, arms and legs spread like a snow angel as your chest heaves up and down. you hear soft footsteps approaching before a shadow forms over you. art looks down at you with a satisfied smile on his face as he stretches his arms out and lifts you back up, the slight physical contact already making your heart race in your chest.

“good job, baby” you feel your cheeks heat up at the pet name, trying hard to disguise your instant shyness. it makes you wonder if he calls other girls similar names— but you choose to believe it’s just you.

“hm. i don’t know. i could’ve done better.”

“baby, don’t be so hard on yourself. you did great, okay? you should be proud of yourself. i certainly am very proud of you.”

“you are?” you stare at him with sparkling eyes, catching yourself wanting to hear more of his praise as you walk to the exit together, still trying to catch your breath— he’s so subtle, you don’t even notice him walking slightly behind you, secretly staring at your ass swaying from side to side as you walk.

“are you crazy? of course i am! you know i’m always proud of you, right? my best girl, after all.” he playfully ruffles his hand through your hair before snatching your racket from you to carry it, his hand purposely brushing against your tits. “let’s go get something to eat. you must be starving, hm?”

ੈ♡˳

[gojotojis]

XO pt.1

“In the darkest night hour

I search through the crowd

Your face is all that I see,”

synopsis: a fellow classmate offers to pay you to teach him how to have sex only things get far more complicated than you could’ve anticipated

pairing: virgin choso x fem! reader

content MDNI 18+: onlyfans, angst, fluff, fingering, light choking, sex 101, sexual conversations, virgin choso, oral (m receiving), dacryphillia, overstimulation, college au

Most people have always considered you a smart girl, but even smart girls make stupid choices.

You’ve always been confident in your sexuality, so confident you didn’t see the harm in profiting off of it. You had made your twitter and onlyfans a few months ago and though it’s not famous, it has built some traction. You never show your face, too afraid of the consequences that would inevitably follow but you’re desperate for money. So desperate that when your fellow classmate Choso Kamo approached you with the most absurd question, you ultimately decided yes.

“Will you teach me how to have sex?”

The question rings in your ear, you blink at him and laugh. You instantly regret it by the embarrassed expression that takes over his features.

“Why would you ask me that?” You question as he follows you out of your lecture hall. You’re familiar with choso in the sense that you two have a few classes together.

“I heard about what you do, I’m willing to pay” he says and you stop in your tracks, head turning sharply to stare menacingly at him.

“What I do? What is it that you think I do?” you ask, your voice extremely defensive.

“I saw your twitter, I recognized the butterfly tattoo on your back”he says scratching the back of his neck and you feel dread. You must of forgotten to photoshop it out.

“So are you going to blackmail me?”you ask, voice cracking.

“What? No! I just figured you could help me. I haven’t told anyone about it and I won’t ever” he assures as you start to walk and he falls in step beside you.

“To teach you how to have sex?”you ask making his cheeks turn red. His hair covers his face like a curtain and you feel amused, he looks like he could beat the shit out of someone for just looking at him funny but here he is implying he’s a virgin. You eye the sleeve tattoo that paints the skin of his right arm to the metal rings on his fingers. He’s extremely sexy, you can’t lie but who the fuck asks someone that.

“Yeah…”he says and you can’t help but laugh again.

“I’m sorry, I’m just having an extremely hard time believing you’re a virgin” you admit and he frowns, it’s odd that this man two times your size can make something look utterly adorable but he does.

“Why do you want that anyways?” you ask skeptical as you make your way toward the library.

“There’s this girl I’ve been talking to, we aren’t dating but it’s obvious she wants to do stuff but I don’t want to fuck it up”he confesses making your brows raise as he follows you between the bookshelves into the fantasy section.

“So your idea of impressing the girl you like is by having sex with another girl?”you ask skeptical and slightly appalled.

“It’s complicated, she’s talking to other people but I really like her and I know she likes me”he says as your fingers graze over the spines of the books.

“I don’t know, I’ve never been put in this situation before and I hardly know you. I’m not the kind of girl that just goes sleeping with strangers” you say turning to face him.

“I’ll pay you, you’d be helping me and once it’s done you’ll never hear from me again,” he offers.

“How much of my content did you see?” you ask feeling self conscious for some reason. On twitter you simply post pictures in lingerie, onlyfans is another story though.

“Just your twitter, it was in my suggested” he admits, embarrassed. You’re doing slightly well for yourself now that you started onlyfans but extra money wouldn’t kill you.

“If I say yes, then there has to be rules and I get $350 per lesson” you say and he simply shakes his head which surprises you. He must really like this girl.

“One, no means no which goes both ways. Don’t push me to do something I’m not comfortable with and I won’t either. Two, absolutely no one can ever know about this. Three, I get paid directly after each lesson. And finally four, we can only do this on Fridays” you say.

“Okay that’s fine, there’s no rush” he says and pulls out his phone, he hands it to you to see a new contact waiting so you type in your name and number, hoping you don’t regret this.

The first Friday rolls around and you’re embarrassed to admit you’re nervous. You’re not by any means a virgin but this just feels wrong and strange. The feelings grows worse when Choso shows up at your apartment.

It’s extremely awkward when you let him in, both of you looking anywhere but eachother.

“You a horror fan?”he asks looking at the horror movie posters that line the walls of your living room to the shelf filled with horror movies.

“Yeah,” you say as he walks infront of your Suspiria poster.

“What’s your favorite horror movie?”he asks and you have to think because there’s simply too many.

“Currently Evil Dead Rise, made my skin crawl in the best way” you admit.

“It was pretty good, mines Saw” he says which isn’t too surprising.

There’s a meow and something crawls itself between his legs, tail wrapping around his ankle. He looks down and starts to pick her up.

“Oh she doesn’t like to be picked u-“ you say watching him lift your cat and she purs, nuzzling her face into his neck. He laughs at her affection and your eyes widen.

“She hates for anyone that’s not me to touch her” you explain.

“Animals love me, what’s her name?”he asks.

“Clover” you say watching the brown Persian cat make heart eyes at him.

“Cute” he says as you clasp your hands together, knots growing in your stomach from nerves.

“So, should we start?”you ask and he nods setting Clover down and following you to your bedroom.

Your rooms more muted than the rest of the apartment, you’re still decorating after only moving in a month ago.

He takes a seat on the edge of the bed and you cross your arms, staring at him.

“So have you kissed anyone?” you ask and he’s silent making your stomach churn. You feel like a super villain about to steal his innocence. He’s too hot to have never kissed someone.

“It just never happened, I just kept to myself in highschool and girls terrified me,” he confesses making your eyes soften.

“It’s okay, I just want to make sure you really want to go through with this. There’s nothing wrong with being a virgin, and if a girl truly likes you then she won’t have a problem with that. If we continue I’ll basically be your first everything, to a lot of people that’s serious”you inform and he looks up at you with a shrug.

“It’s fine, it’s just sex”he says, you don’t agree but it’s his choice.

“Okay so let’s just work on kissing for now” you say sitting beside him. His smell is intoxicating like mahogany teakwood with hints of vanilla. You’re trying to keep your composure because it’s just a kiss but you can’t help the nerves you feel. You shove them down and close your eyes.

You wait for what feels like minutes before they open and he’s just staring at you, you can’t help the laughter that bursts out of you.

“Choso, this is where you kiss me”you explain, watching his calm demeanor crumble into one of fright. It’s strange to be doing this with someone you don’t have feelings for, Choso attractive but you’ve at least had some sort of talking stage and feelings before doing this.

“Want me to kiss you?”you ask and he nods making you sit up on your knees to face him. You’re so much smaller than him, it makes him nervous.

Your hands grip his cheeks gently and close your eyes, pressing your lips to his. You hold it for a few seconds before pulling away. His lips are incredibly soft and plump, not like a lot of the guys you’ve kissed before.

“Kisses like that are more about affection to me, making out is more skilled more sensual” you explain to him.

“Can we makeout?”He asks and you smile, his softness and innocence mixed with his scary appearance only makes him so much more cuter.

“I was so bad about making out my first time, but just do what feels natural. I’m gonna let you initiate it” you say watching his hands shake slightly as they mimic your earlier actions and cup your cheeks in his hands.

His hands are freezing as you close your eyes giving him a few seconds to work up the courage to kiss you. You smile feeling his lips meet yours, it’s hesitant but soft.

He tenses when your tongue licks his lips and pokes at his mouth. He hesitantly opens his mouth and your tongue glides against his. He tastes like strawberries and it’s addicting but what surprises you is the tongue piercing.

His hands leave your face to squeeze your hips tightly, it makes you squeak but you pull yourself closer to him, hands moving to grip the back of his head, fingers tingling with his hair. He’s a fast learner because he’s dominating you, his mouth moving against yours like he wants to possess you. The piercing seems to only heighten the feeling.

You slowly crawl into his lap without breaking the kiss, he’s too into it to notice.

Reluctantly you pull away, needing air. A string of salvia connects your swollen lips as you take deep inhales before wiping it away.

He’s hard underneath you which he seems to notice because he’s starts to panic.

“Fuck I’m sorry” he says breathlessly and you shake your head.

“It’s okay, I get turned on from kissing too. You did really good though better than me my first time” you say making him blush.

“I liked it” he says and you laugh.

“I could tell, I was scared you were gonna be those people that kiss with their eyes open” you confess and now he laughs.

“Honestly I was but yours were closed so I followed you” he admits making you laugh.

“Yeah don’t do that or you’ll scare her,”you say making him nod.

“Want to try again or something else?” You ask. He’s incredibly shy, too afraid to answer.

“Choso, this is about you. Just tell me what you want,” you say gently.

“I don’t know it just feels rude if I ask, I don’t want to disrespect you” he says feeling guilty making your brows raise.

“Okay, then I’ll ask” you say moving your hand between you two to the bulge in his pants. He inhales and stiffens, looking down at your hand.

“Do you want me to touch you here?” you ask and he nods.

“With my hands?” You ask.

“No,”.

“Then with what?”you question.

“Your mouth” he answers and you climb off of him.

“You sure?” you ask and he nods making you drop to your knees. Your hearts pounding, even though you knew this would come, it still didn’t feel real till now.

He watches your every every move as you unbuckle his belt, black nails dragging his zipper down.

“Can you stand? It’ll be better that way”you say and he nods.

“If I tap your thigh that means it’s too much okay?”you ask.

“Okay” he says looking down at you, the look sending heat between your thighs. Fingers grip the waist band of his pants and slowly drag them down revealing muscular thighs, there’s no way he doesn’t workout.

He steps outside of his pants once they hit the ground and he stares awkwardly at the ceiling making you giggle. No bodies ever made you laugh this much without the use of words, he’s amusing to say the least.

He looks down at you frowning and you shake your head. “I’m sorry, you’re just incredibly funny without even trying” you say.

“I think you just find everything funny” he says fingers tapping nervously at his thighs.

“Trust me, it’s very hard to make me laugh” you say placing your hand over his to stop his nervous tapping.

“We don’t have to do this, there’s always next week or never. I honestly thought you’d maybe give up after the kiss” you say and he shakes his head.

“No, I’m serious about this. I just can’t help but be nervous” he confesses and you smile up at him.

“Just relax, if you want to stop just say the words. It’s just us and I’m not going to judge you” you assure letting go of his hand and he nods.

His eyes find yours when your fingers grip the waist band of his boxers, in all honesty you both are nervous now. You slowly pull them down and he tenses, he stared straight ahead at your tv too scared to see your reaction.

You’re grateful because your eyes widen at the sight of him, you’ve seen plenty of dicks and the word pretty has never come to mind till now. He’s thick and long, with a few veins and beads up precum pooling at the tip. He shutters when you gently wrap your hand around what you’re able to, your fist too small to completely grip him. He’s painfully hard and hot to the touch.

“Look at me, eye contact is everything” you tell him making him look down at you.

Your tongue laps at the precum and he hisses, hands curling into fists at his sides.

“You can touch me, grip my hair if you need to” you tell him, feeling him hesitantly thread his fingers through your hair. You give him little kitten licks, testing the waters and he’s so responsive to it. He’s biting his lip as he looks down at you, dark purples eyes narrowed in on you.

“Fuck” he breathes when your mouth wraps around him, your cheeks hollow as you slowly suck on him with your mouth stretching to accommodate him.

Your nails press into his thighs as you pull away to spit on him a few times. Taking him back in your mouth, you start bobbing your head, mouth watering with him inside.

His fingers tighten around your scalp as you take in more of him till his tip brushes the back of your throat. You look at him with watery eyes and he panics, pulling out.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to hurt you” he says and you shake your head.

“You didn’t, it’s a natural response. I would’ve tapped your thigh if it’s too much, remember ?”you ask and he nods. You’ve never met a guy that’s cared this much for your well being during acts of sex, it’s strange but comforting.

“Yeah, sorry. Can we try again?”He asks and you nod smiling as you take him in your hands. You kiss the tip a few times before taking him back into your mouth, feeling him gather your hair into a ponytail.

He hits the back of your throat, springing more tears from your eyes. His free hand reaches out to brush them away as you start gagging on him.

Your tongue moves to lick the underside of his cock which he must love because his hips slowly start to move forward. He releases your hair to grip the back of your head and starts fucking your throat.

His heads thrown back, losing himself in the feeling of the warmth of your mouth. Saliva drips down your chin as he hits the back of your throat with each thrust.

“Fuck” he moans and your nipples harden, he twitches a few times inside of you which you expected.

“I’m gonna cum” he says looking down at you and you nod around him, grabbing his large tattooed hand to wrap it around your throat. He can feel the bulge his dick is making inside of you and it unlocks something primal because he starts fucking your mouth with abandon. His desire overpowers his concern for you as tears roll down your cheeks while you greedily taking in air through your nose.

He’s rough, chasing his own release as your nails press deeper into his skin.

His hand presses down on your throat, obsessed with feeling himself move inside of you. He doesn’t feel concern for your tears anymore, he feels turned on. Your big watery eyes staring up at him with his cock in your mouth and his hand pressed on your throat, makes him see white and he twitches against your throat.

Several grunts leave him before he throw his head back and shoots thick ropes of cum down your throat, you simply swallow every drop as he continues unloading inside of you. When he finally stops, you pull away gasping with drool on your mouth and chin.

You wipe it away as he sobers up, fingers reaching to wipe your tears before he helps you up onto your feet. He bends down to put his clothes back on

“Did you like it?”you ask, voice scratchy from the beating your throat just took.

“A lot, is it always like that?”he asks making you bite back a laugh.

“Depends on the person I guess but you took control that second time really so that was all you. You did really good, I think we should stop here though for today,” you say.

“Yeah, thank you” he says making your cheeks tinge red, nobodies ever thanked you for giving them head but then again you’re quite literally doing him a favor.

“Don’t mention it, like literally don’t mention it” you say earning a laugh from him as he pulls out his wallet, handing you the money you were promised. This feels wrong as you take it, but you do and thank him as you guide him out of your room.

Clover jumps down from her cat tower and walks between his legs, rubbing her cheek against his pant leg.

“I think you’re her boyfriend now” you say as he bends down to pick her up.

“I don’t mind” he says scratching under her chin which turns her into a purring mess.

“She’s gonna fall in love with you if you don’t stop” you say watching her nuzzle him.

“I think she already has”.

Much to your surprise Choso didn’t say anything to you when you saw him in class the next day. He simply took his usual seat behind you and followed along with the class.

In all fairness, you’ve never spoken to eachother aside from the times he’s asked you for a pencil or paper but it just feels odd not speaking to someone after something so intimate. Sure the guys you’ve hooked up with were assholes but at least they could muster up an emoji at the very least afterwards.

You internally cringe at the thought as you walk toward your friends, seated at your usual lunch table.

“Pookie!”your bestfriend beams as you take the seat beside her. She wraps her arms around you as you greet the rest of the girls.

“So guess who’s throwing a party tomorrow,” Yuki says making you pretend to be in deep thought, fingers tapping at your chin.

“Mahito!” You say with mock excitement. That guy throws a party literally every week, and you haven’t been to a single one. You don’t like him ever since you caught trying to take a picture up your skirt as you walked up the stairs.

“Yes, and I’ll die if you don’t come” she says dramatically.

“I can’t, I have plans,” you say. Your next lesson with Choso is tomorrow which seems far more interesting than a Mahito party.

“Like what?”she asks skeptical.

“I picked up an extra shift, I need the money” you lie and she shuts up, letting you eat your food while Utahime complains about Satoru Gojo.

When Friday approaches and lesson two is on its way, Choso is at your door with a bag of cat treats in his hand. It’s strange seeing him but not speaking to him for the entirety of the week, even though thats been your normal. You smile, taking the treats from him and offering him something to drink but he’s already lifting Clover up.

You take a seat on the couch and watch them, she’s tiny but looks even tinier in his arms.

“She’s making me want a cat” he says and you smile, you honestly want a second one but you’re nervous about how Clover would react.

“They’re the cutest, though she’s incredibly clingy,” you admit.

“I wouldn’t mind having someone obsessed with me”he says kissing the top of her head before putting her down and she jumps onto her cat tower.

“So I was thinking I could answer any questions you might have before we start,” you say and he sits down beside you.

“Okay, but I honestly can’t think of anything”he says and you chuckle.

“It’s okay, I have a few tips and advice. Now some people like when you let them cum first, but I’ve heard others like if you cum early. I guess to them it’s like you really like them you can’t hold it. No one’s ever made me cum so I don’t really have an opinion it,”you admit.

“You’ve never?”he asks.

“Nope, I mean I can make myself but nobody has ever been able to. I’d like to think I just haven’t found the right one because it’d be sad if no guy knows how to” you say feeling slightly embarrassed.

“If you don’t want to cum so fast, probably masturbate before hand. Always use protection, I’d assume you know that. And the clit is the key to everything, that feeling inside is great but add the clit into play and it’s incredible. Oh and aftercare, it’s nice when a guy helps clean the mess that was made. Some people have different prefences when it comes to aftercare but it’s about emotional intimacy, showing care and affection after the fact like cuddling for example” you explain, hoping you’re not overwhelming him.

“What are your prefences?” He asks making you think about it, you’ve never experienced it to be honest but you can at least tell him what you wish you had.

“Cuddling probably and eating together, I get really hungry after sex or just masturbating” you admit.

“Can I ask you something?”you ask making him nod.

“Have you ever touched yourself like to the point where you came?” You ask not sure what he’ll say. You’re just trying to gauge what you’re working with.

“Yeah and I’ve watched porn but I don’t know, it lacks intimacy and feels so fake that I’m bored watching it”he admits.

“I couldn’t agree more, when I was younger it was cool but now I hate it. I want something with love and affection” you say feeling hypocritical because neither of those components factor in to what you’re doing.

“Same, so what’s on the agenda for today?”he asks, cheeks turning pink.

“You’re gonna finger me” you say bluntly, standing up and grabbing his hand to pull him up. He doesn’t say anything as you guide him into your bedroom and shut the door.

Your hands reach up to pull him down to you as you stand on your tippy toes and kiss him, the peck turns into more and your proudly feel his mouth dominate yours. His hands grip your waist, pulling you into him as your tongues touch.

You pull away to lift your shirt off. Grabbing his hands, you place them over your breasts and tense at the cold touch as your nipples harden underneath him.

He wants to say something but he bites it down, letting his thumbs brush your soft skin. His thumb flicks a nipple and you moan. He watches you take his hand and drag it down your belly until it’s dipping in to your shorts. His pupils dilate when his fingers meet your wet cunt before you grip his wrist and pull him away so you can take off your shorts. He’s staring at his drenched fingers and you take them, slowly forcing them into his mouth.

He’s too distracted by the taste of you to notice you climbing onto the bed till you’re sitting up on your elbows with your legs closed.

“Touch me”you say as he turns to face you. You’re completely naked infront of him, something flashes in his eyes and quickly disappears. A little scream leaves you when he grips your ankles and drags you toward the edge of the bed before he kneels down between your now spread legs.

You sit back up watching him stare at your pussy and it makes you feel incredibly self conscious with how intense his gaze is.

He finally looks up at you and kneels to the floor.

His fingers slowly touch you, it’s more out of curiosity than anything. You can feel your arousal coating his fingers as he presses them into your clit and your belly tightens.

“That’s the clit, key to everything” you whisper as his little strokes against it have you moaning. There’s something about his touch that intensifies everything and you can’t understand why.

It feels really good, too good and you’ve barely started. You have the urge to fall back but you want to see when his fingers push into you.

You can feel them spread you, he puts two at your hole and you tense.

“Start with one,” you tell him and he retracts a finger. His dark purple eyes find yours as you watch his inked finger slowly sink into you.

His finger moves around, feeling the softness of your inner walls before he pulls it out and pushes it back in. He watches the way you bite your lip as he creates a steady pace, it’s agonizing.

“More”you whine and he obliges, inserting another finger and you gasp, arching your back. Your responses fuel him because his fingers start plunging in and out faster, the squelching of your pussy fills the room.

He surprises you when his free hand splays across your tit, grip it roughly. He squeeze the flesh as your hips grind against his fingers, feeling your juices trickle down the crack of your ass.

“You’re doing so good” you cry out and he snaps.

His fingers move brutally as he climbs on top of you, your eyes widen when his lips find yours and he swallows your cries.

He’s a fast learner, and you fear he’s going to be the first person to even make you cum. You’re certain of it when his thumb grazes your clit, his fingers buried inside you mixed with that feeling has your stomach coiling.

“Ahhh” you cry feeling yourself clench around him, droplets of squirt shoot out of you as he pushes you toward a release. Your arms wrap around him, clinging to him when the feeling becomes absolutely too much and you feel yourself cumming on his fingers, spraying your thighs and the duvet.

Your mouths wide, jaw slack as you twitch against him still feeling him fuck you through it. There’s no way he’s real, absolutely no way.

“Choso!” You cry at the assault of his thumb on your clit pushing you toward another orgasm as your stomach clenches painfully and your thighs press into his hips.

You’re too overstimulated to say anything when his lips brush your forehead and you cum again. You cry as he pulls his fingers out, the feeling to much on your sensitive cunt.

You fall back onto the mattress, too exhausted to see what he’s doing until you feel him cleaning between your legs with a rag he must’ve gotten from your bathroom. It makes you want to smile but you remind yourself that this is meaningless and transactional.

You hate when you feel him slowly start to dress you, sliding your shorts back on with gentle ease and pulling you up to help you put your shirt back on. It’s the bare minimum but no one’s ever even done that for you.

You’re like a ragdoll in his hold as he lays you back down, your chest still rising rapidly from your activities.

“You hungry?” He asks making you look at him and you nod which somehow ends up with the two of you now seated at the diner beside your apartment.

This is probably a bad idea for so many reasons but you are hungry, not just from the orgasm but you quite literally haven’t eaten today.

You’re tired but your hunger exceeds it, grateful you changed into sweats for some comfortability. The waitress scribbles your steak melt that you ordered and your cheese fries with a sprite before she takes down Choso’s order of chili cheese fries and a barbecue n bacon burger with a strawberry shake.

Once the waitress leaves the silence is incredibly loud a you pretend to be in awe of the salt and pepper shakers.

“Do you have siblings?”he asks making you raise your brows, you were afraid of this but you answer anyways.

“Nope, only child. You?”.

“Three, I’m the oldest” he admits.

“Yeah, I always wanted siblings but my parents kind of had me as a means to keep their marriage together which still ended up failing” you say, a subject you’ve never told anyone which makes him frown.

“I’m sorry” he says and you shake your head.

“It’s not the worst, at one point they became so competitive to prove who was a better parent that they spoiled me beyond belief. It was nice to for once have their attention even if their intentions were selfish” you supply.

“So you were neglected as a child?”he asks, those purple eyes staring into your soul.

“Pretty much. I had a nanny but she was usually sleeping and I just played alone. I moved out a little over a month ago, they haven’t contacted me which isn’t surprising but still disappointing. I don’t think they’ve ever loved me but at least for a while I deluded myself into believing they did” you admit, not realizing your eyes have started to water.

“Nobody deserves that, you’re the last person to deserve that” he says as the waitress appears with your drinks and you thank her.

“Can I ask you something?”you question, eager to change the subject as he sips from his milkshake and he nods.

“Have you ever been in love?”you ask, you’re curious. It’s an emotion you’ve never felt for another person and something about him seems like the epitome of love and affection.

“I don’t know. There was this girl I use to have a crush on, something about her just felt magnetic. Everytime she spoke it was with passion and this twinkle in her eyes. And when she laughed, it made me smile. I remember my first day of school, she let me use her textbook because I hadn’t gotten mine yet, she took and F so I could do the assignment” he says, his lips tugging upward at the thought of her.

“Is this the girl you’re talking to?”you ask and he shakes his head.

“No, I realized that girl was out of my league but the point is, if I could’ve been in love with anyone it would’ve been her, I’d want it to be her”he says as your food arrives.

He doesn’t comment when you take your straw and put it in his milkshake, before taking a sip. Maybe this is why he tastes like strawberries.

“How long have you had Clover?”He asks inbetween bites as you stuff a fry in your mouth.

“Three years, I really needed something to make me happy and when I saw her at the shelter I practically slapped my debit card at them. It’s sad but I think the only affection I’ve received has been from her” you admit, taking a bite of your melt.

“Well actually my bestfriend too, we met last year and it was an instant connection. It’s still strange getting use to her affection and her desire to talk to me, it’s hard not feeling like a burden at times” you say hating how much you’re over sharing but he listens.

“I don’t think you’re a burden, you’re the nicest girl I’ve ever met and your presence is comforting” he says making your heart clench.

“Your mom must be a really amazing woman” you say making his brows furrow with a laugh that spreads warmth throughout your chest.

“She is but what makes you say that?”.

“You’re just so nice, definitely written by a woman. You’re strange too, like I promise I’m not judging you it’s just fascinating that you’re this big tall macular guys with tattoos and a tongue piercing that looks like he could snap me like a pencil but you’re actually so soft” you say and his face scrunches up cutely like you’ve insulted him.

“I’m just as rough” he says as you eat another fry.

“Oh trust me I know” you say making him blush so hard that it reaches the tips of his ears.

“Shut up and eat your foot,” he says pressing his hand against your face making you laugh.

Ever since the diner, you feel lighter around Choso like there’s a sense of understanding between eachother. You both still keep your boundaries but he greets you when you come to class now, even walks with you to your next class where you exchange idle chit chat mostly about Clover or him telling you stories about his family. You’ve gathered he absolutely adores his family, especially his brothers. It’s refreshing since you’ve never really had that.

“He’s so cute”you gush as he shows you a photo of his little brother Yuji as a baby. Your insides melt, you absolutely adore babies.

Choso smiles proudly as he show you more pictures of him and his family as he walks you to your next class.

“I hope my kids are that cute” you cry at another picture of baby Yuji and he laughs. No baby should look that adorable crying as they tug at tufts of their own pink hair. Your eyes water at the sight of baby Choso, heart melting at the little onyx pigtails.

“Babies really make you cry” he notes and you nod.

“Just so fucking cute” you sigh feeling baby fever. You’d love to be a mom eventually but given your lack of one and childhood neglect, you think you’d make a shitty mom.

You two stop at the front of your class and you wave goodbye to him, watching him walk off before you go inside.

Yuki’s waiting for you in the seat beside yours with a wide grin as Shoko rolls her eyes.

“What’s going on?” You ask skeptically, taking your seat.

“Yuki’s talking to three guys and needs your help telling her which one she should have sex with” Utahime says making your eyes widen.

“She says you’ll know the answer” Shoko says making all three turn to you.

“Well I need info” you say watching as Yuki quickly sends a text before looking back at you.

“Okay guy #1 kind of an ass but I’ve seen his dick and it’s really nice. Guy #2 is super sweet, shy but incredibly sexy and Guy #3 is hot but he uses way too many emojis every single text” she says with a frown and you laugh.

“The answer is incredibly obvious, guy #2. I’ve learned shy guys are kind of the freakiest,” you say your cheeks turning red as you think of Choso.

Your next lesson is in two days and you’re eager as bad as that may sound. You’ve never found oral enjoyable on you but considering he’s managed to make you cum when no man has, makes you feel like he might change that.

“Are you talking to someone?” Utahime asks and you’re quick to shake your head. It’s been a year since you’ve had sex, led alone talked to someone and after spending time with Choso, he’s starting to make you raise your standards.

Maybe if things had been different, you’d be the girl he’s so desperate to please, the girl he wants.

“Ugh he’s busy Friday night, what the hell am I gonna do now?”Yuki questions.

“Send him nudes, that’ll change his mind” Shoko advises and Yuki grins as she sends Choso nudes.

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[joosthead]

SMUT PROMPT 2 PLZZZ

just too soft for all of it || j.k. f!reader

₊˚⊹⋆ prompt(s): 2S) crying crying during sex that leads to a pause or early end to comfort and take care of whatever emotions bubbled over & 3F)  gently pushing their hair behind their ear to see their face better

₊˚⊹⋆ reader: f!reader, no pronouns, reader gets referred to as his “favourite girl” one time. notfamous!reader lol also does not speak dutch

₊˚⊹⋆ word count: 4.4k

₊˚⊹⋆ cw: smut (fingering, piv), a good amount of negative self thought (i may have gone overboard—feeling inadequate as a partner, reader is very hard on themself and quite sensitive), mentions of anxiety/stress/being overwhelmed, a very fluffy and healthy joost :( aur i love him anyways, pls heed the prompt cuz that in itself is a content warning teehee, 🧀🧀🧀alert i can’t lie!!, a variety of dutch terms of endearment i'm not sure i’m using right but it’s for the sake of no y/n

₊˚⊹⋆ track of the fic: "sweet nothing" by taylor swift

₊˚⊹⋆ junote: i resonate heavy with this 🙃🙃 had the worst last few weeks of this uni year but i’m FREE!!!! thanks for requesting this, i combined this with a few other asks stated above! happy first juno joost fic to meee yippeee

rpf ahead—don't like it, don't read it!! you've been warned. please do not repost this on any other platform.

18+ only — explicit rpf content ahead, minors dni.

To say the utter least—it had been a hard few weeks for you. 

The whims of life carried you away like a tsunami to your normal routine—work and classes and friends and family and life, life that you couldn’t ignore or get away from like you wanted to do, nothing to do except doing it. And you’d been doing it, just fine for the most part, but one thing led to another, and the last week was a whirlwind of commitments, obligations, your procrastinating on all of them, somehow. You got yourself into a mess of your own making. 

It certainly didn’t help that your boyfriend, Joost, was away for his own life: a festival performance in Canada, one in Belgium, one in the Netherlands but not one you could attend easily with all of the work you had for yourself. After that, he worked on the new album in Germany, putting the final touches on his 9th project, filming new content and preparing for his upcoming tour. 

He left around the beginning of when your life started getting busier. If you added it up—23 days you hadn’t seen him in person, but it’s not like you were counting (you were counting, and sad the entire time about his absence.). It felt like the same amount of time you hadn’t even seen or talked to him, through the phone, on Facetime, even texting each other.

Voice memos in the bathroom at work, always apologizing for how rushed you had to be; leaving him on delivered for hours as you studied, or had an event you needed to be at, or had a person you needed to talk to, someone else who needed your time more than Joost needed yours, and it was too much. All of it was too much. Too much for you to handle easily, every second taken by someone else. 

You felt like a terrible partner, not being able to speak to him as much as you wanted. Seeing all of his messages, the reassurance that he understands how busy you are and that in the end, you'll always make time for each other…his ability to be such a good partner held up next to your perceived inadequacy made you even more stressed. 

In the end, it’ll all work out—today, Joost flew back home, though you still had a number of commitments and assignments to get to and couldn’t pick him up from the airport. Your mutual friend picked him up, and you bit your nails at every update given; willing the time to go slower so you could tidy up more, work on that one last piece of paperwork so you wouldn’t have to worry about it, make sure everything is perfect so Joost can have a good welcome back.

In the nick of time, you were able to get everything done, but it still felt as if there was something missing, like you'd be hit with a missed deadline in the midst of your time back together, and it would all come crumbling down. 

As you opened the door, right as your friend pulled up to your street, you tried to put it aside, and you did—for now. Late afternoon and you stand at the top of your townhouse steps, watching in nervous excitement as Joost unloads his luggage from the trunk. Your friend closes the trunk and waves at you.

You wave back, but your eyes are on Joost as he gathers the two suitcases and starts rolling them to you in a sort of disorganized frenzy, just as excited as you are; you would come forward and help, but it’s cute to watch him, clumsy and stumbling over his long pants and tote bag and everything—your Joost, finally back with you. 

He wears a heavy black jacket, sunglasses, a black cap that he takes off and shakes his hair out of; the sun shines off him, and you can't help but smile at the sight. His hair grew out a little, the darker blonde roots growing in. Those jeans are ones you’ve never seen before, new glasses, new clunky boots that look greatly uncomfortable but perfectly his style. Evidence of the time passed, and for some strange reason, it brings a pang to your chest that you try to ignore as you come down the steps of your house. 

“Come here, come here, come here, baby, I missed you,” Joost exclaims, arms open and leaving his bags behind him to come meet you halfway, laughing. 

You say as you hug him around his neck, his arms around your waist and squeezing you tight, “I’m so sorry I couldn’t pick—” 

“Don’t worry about it, I know you were busy.” 

You nod as he moves his arms around your neck and you go around his waist, Joost pecking your cheek several times and making you laugh. “I still feel bad I couldn’t pick you up.”

“Never feel bad, you’d still be the best even if you left me on the side of the road.” You give him and his compliment a weak smile as you pull away. 

—

The first time you get a moment to yourself in a month: Joost’s head lays in your lap as you both watch some cartoon on the couch together after eating. 

You cleaned most of yesterday and some of today; you cooked most of last night since you knew you had more time, preparing Joost’s favorite meal—it was the best you could reasonably do, considering all of the other obligations you had in these last two days. 

As he ate, you pushed around your own food; would’ve made it fresh, could've had a nice table setting for dinner, should’ve prepared more for all of this. You still gave him a sheepish smile as you watched him happily eat the microwaved meal you warmed up for him, no indication at all that he’s disappointed or unhappy like you are with yourself. You shouldn’t feel like this, but you do. It’s getting increasingly difficult to shake. 

The colors and lines dance across the TV, spouting raunchy jokes that you can half understand with the few years of Dutch you have under your belt; the air conditioner is on, and you can finally rest. Joost is changed out of his airport outfit and into some shorts and a shirt. He’s home, and you did the best you could do, and now he’s in your arms again. 

You don’t even mean to, but you sigh, perhaps louder than usual, because Joost looks up at you from your lap, brushes a lock of your hair out of your eyes, says, “You’re the best, you know?” 

It catches you off guard enough that you shake your head almost instinctively, not fast enough to hide…whatever feeling this is you’re feeling. “I don’t feel like it, Joosty.” 

“You don’t?” He gets up from your lap, sitting next to you, and brings his face close to yours. “You should, because you are.” 

Your noses are brushing, and even in the midst of your racing thoughts, you can't help but smile at him. His face grows into a smile, and you come forward and kiss him, deeply; you know it takes him by surprise, how he takes a little to kiss back, like trying to learn each other again. Nonetheless, he kisses back, holding your face in his hands, grinning into it—he's so pleased, so content, you know it by how sweetly he holds you. 

The TV becomes background noise to you, the air conditioner no use with how hot you feel when you move to sit atop him in his lap, one of his hands on the small of your back, the other on your ass as you grind down on him, licking into his mouth. 

“You're so tense,” Joost says when you pull away, thumbs rubbing into your back where there are sure to be knots in your muscles. 

You roll your eyes. “Can you blame me?” you snicker and he smiles. 

“I’ll relieve some tension for you, then.” 

Nothing but a few layers of clothes separate you—he smells so good, tastes so good, feels so good that you pull away, run your hands underneath his shirt, feeling his warm body, his stomach. You move to take it off of him, and he’s a step ahead of you, taking it off himself and attaching his lips to yours again, like a magnet. 

“You’re not wasting any time,” he says as you rest your hands on his chest and kiss down his stubble covered jaw to his neck, on top of Lola Bunny and back up again. 

“I need you, Joost,” you breathe in between kisses, and he pulls back and groans which makes you giggle, “What is that supposed to mean?” 

“You can't just say that, oh my god,” Joost whines, looking up at you pathetically, pupils blown and lips swollen from yours. “That’s so hot,” he laughs, and it makes you laugh too, how ridiculous he is. “Fuck, I love you.” He comes back in for one more kiss before he shifts so you can lay down on the couch, and he's on top of you, kissing again. He helps you shimmy down your shorts, your underwear, and in no time—his hand is between your legs.

“I would have taken it slow but—I’m too excited,” he breathes. You palm his hard cock through his shorts, coaxing a sigh out of him. Joost hovers above, leaning on one elbow and using the other hand to run his fingers through your slit, wetting them with how aroused you are. Involuntarily, your legs twitch, your breath catches in your mouth, and Joost gives you a soft laugh. “You’re so sensitive, schat.” Fingers still touching you so gently, he noses at your cheek—you’re a hairpin trigger, how reactive you are to him. “Has it been that long?” 

Breathless, you nod as he presses his thumb to your clit, petting at it. “Too long, I was waiting for you.”

“I could say the same for you.” 

You sit up, pushing up against him, still kissing like you can’t bear to be separated from him, but he pulls back from you—brings two fingers to his mouth, wetting them with his spit, and the sight brings your heart to your stomach with how arousing it is. 

Sure, Joost sends videos; yes, you have…homemade…videos of your own between the two of you; his deep voice through the speaker in your late night Facetimes, talking you through it or his incessant compliments when you send him some pictures of your own. 

Nothing compares to the real thing—the smell of his cologne on his collar even after he’s taken a shower; his blonde hair in your eyes as he kisses you; holding onto his strong arms as he fingers you, the wet sound music to your ears though normally, it would make you sheepish at how filthy this all is.  

Sometimes it makes you laugh that the random guy you met with a Crazy Frog tattoo on his forearm is now your boyfriend, but it feels so serious now more than ever. You realize now how much you’ve missed him, and how much you’ve pushed down that feeling in favor of everything else. 

Joost crooks his fingers inside of you and you moan into his mouth, which he smiles at. “You like it?” he asks, both of you knowing the answer. He knows you so well, inside and out. Knows that spot inside of you that renders you unable to speak, how to hit it just right like it’s muscle memory to fuck you with his fingers. He rubs your clit at the same time, using his spit and your wetness to do so, and God—you wish never leaving this spot was an option. 

Your climax fast approaches you; Joost kissing at the side of your lips, your chin because you’re too lost in your pleasure to kiss back. With a few more pumps of his fingers, he brings you there, a choked moan tumbling from your mouth as you cum, almost falling into him as he takes you through the last waves of your orgasm. “Thank you,” you breathe, pressing a deep kiss to his lips again now that you have the ability to. 

“Thanking me? Nothing to thank me for,” he says, but you shake your head.

“I disagree,” you say quietly, palming over his erection once more now that you’ve gathered yourself. “I have everything to thank you for,” you think, but can’t say out loud. You move so you can be on your knees on the ground in between his legs. It’s been quite a bit, enough so that the program on the TV is completely different now, the AC has turned off—he’s still so hard, still hasn’t been taken care of.

You're about to lower his shorts, take him into your mouth, but Joost takes your hand and says, “Can we skip it? I wanna be inside of you, lieverd.” 

Almost a whisper, you reply, “Whatever you want,” nodding, and he cocks his head to the side in confusion.

“You’re so quiet today. Is anything wrong?” He can read you like a book, the furrowing of your brow at his suggestion an easy giveaway. 

“Nothing’s the matter,” you lie, but he still looks disbelieving. “I just wanted to give you something back.”

“This is something back and more, baby. Lie down.” 

You do, too tired to argue for your side—the side that wants to give Joost everything you have and more, pay him back for the time you’ve been so absent, so distracted from your relationship and all the things Joost had been doing in the time away. It’s not as if you don’t want to lie down and have him fuck you—it’s just that you feel that you haven’t earned it yet. 

Your body language gives you away—“Still so tense, lieverd,” he says, squeezing your shoulder as you adjust, legs on either side of his thighs. “You sure you want to do this?” 

“Of course I do,” you purr, because of course you do, reaching into his briefs—Joost Klein branded, of course—and pulling his cock out, jerking it a few times and making him groan with the sensation. “You're so sensitive,” you quote him from earlier. “Has it been that long, schat?” 

The pet name makes his cock twitch; a month away, hard work on his album and music videos, content and marketing, coming back home to his favourite girl gazing at him starry-eyed with a hand around his dick and ready to take him inside. If you peered into his mind, this is what he’d be thinking. No thoughts match your worried thinking about how you may or may not have let him down—you didn’t. That would be impossible, at least to him. 

“Much too long.” 

You rest your head on a throw pillow that Joost has laid for you, and he lines himself up with your entrance. Fingertips on his stomach, you stop him for a few seconds from coming forward, and you wrap your hand around his shaft, swiping it through your slit a few times, collecting your wetness and his pre-cum on the head of his cock.

Loudly, he swears in Dutch, and the latter half sounds more like a strangled whisper than any real word. “You…fuck, my god…you are evil,” he laughs, even though he’s now rubbing the head of it against your clit, making you mewl. 

“You ready for me?” he asks, and you nod, licking your lips, trying to control your breathing. Your initial apprehension is long gone, though it could creep back every second—who cares? You’re finally together again. “You’re so wet,” Joost breathes as he eases the head of his cock into you. The stretch is something to get used to after so long away, but he gives time for you to adjust—seems like he might need it more than you do, how he sucks a breath in through gritted teeth, the snail’s pace he's going at. “I might cum right now.” 

“You promise?” you tease, watching the slow slide of his cock inside of you, watching just like he is. 

“I might have to promise with how this is going.” 

“You can do it,” you giggle and then moan because he's managed to fit half of his length into you. “I believe in you.” 

“Yay,” Joost smiles as he bottoms out in you, then gives you a kiss. “We did it!”

He holds his hand up for a high-five and you laugh—”I’m not high-fiving you while you're inside me.” 

“When has that ever stopped you before?”  

Rolling your eyes, you give him the high-five he so desperately wants and he beams at you with a toothy grin. “Never, I guess.” 

“Never,” Joost repeats, and then straightens up. You look up at him through your eyelashes—his mullet is mussed from the tangles of your fingers through his hair, his chest moving steadily up and down with the exertion of this all.  He moves your legs so your left ankle rests on his shoulder, the right wrapped around his hips. 

His hand creeps up your shirt, and you do the rest, exposing your tits to him. Joost is normally so clumsy, so heavy-handed—what a contrast that he can be so calm dragging his fingertips around your nipple, making it pebble in the cold.

He cups your cheek after you moan, then runs his tattooed knuckles down it, slips his thumb between your lips and hooks it on your teeth momentarily—you chase  it, but he continues down your chest and to your belly until his thumb is finally back on your clit and circling it slowly. 

The drag of his cock out of you is wonderful, so wonderful it makes you shudder when he does it, combined with his terribly slow treatment of your clit.

“My baby, did you miss me?” Joost says softly, kissing at your calf, your ankle as he sinks back into you. The sensation robs you of a response, a sigh tumbling out of your mouth before you can stop it, but he takes it as a response enough.  The smile on his face—the beauty mark under his lip, those deep dimples so prominent—you could never tire of it. “I missed you more, schatje.”

It feels so good, it feels like heaven being with him again. He comes back from such a busy time in his life, where you’ve done little, and all he has is praise and warmth and affection for you—fingers you within an inch of your life and doesn’t even ask for anything in return, just takes care of you in the way you need most. 

You know that he benefits from this just as much as you do—this isn’t so one-sided. But your brain is so frazzled from this last month, the nerve endings fried and in want of a fuck up to cling to like they have been whenever you’ve made a mistake at work, in class, in your relationship. 

Joost interrupts your thoughts: “I was so happy to see you on the steps, I could’ve sprinted to you if I wasn’t wearing those damn shoes.”

All of the times that you forgot to reply to Joost, getting a text saying your name and a sad face right after; the times where you were too distracted to give him your full attention and could only hum your acknowledgement to him, having to be reminded about what he said later; that one time just a few days ago you fell asleep on call with him in the middle of him excitedly speaking about a breakthrough with a bridge on the most important song of the album. 

The pleasure you felt earlier is now overshadowed by your racing thoughts. 

“I wrote a song about you, you know?” Joost says, his voice so gentle. I was only going to let you know when the album came out, but I can’t keep a secret.” Rocking against you, his pelvis rubs against your clit and it makes you cling to his shoulders. “The voice memo I sent you earlier—it was my first draft, just me. Did you like it?” 

“You…you wrote a song about me?” 

Only now do you remember the voice memo Joost sent you in the morning when you were still cleaning, the one that you saw and made a fleeting mental note to reply to later on, which you promptly forgot as you vacuumed, dusted, folded. 

Such misplaced priorities, and now you're paying the sad price.

“Joost,” you say, eyebrows screwing up, that all too familiar pulling feeling behind your nose and eyes—you realize quickly that all of the emotions bottled up inside of you from the past month have come out with vengeance at the new knowledge of Joost’s song about you. The knowledge wouldn’t have been new if you just paid more attention. 

You try to hold it back, pushing down the feelings again, but it just won’t work. All of it spilling over at the worst possible time, tears streaming down your face before you even know it. You fail to wipe the wetness from your cheeks—Joost stops his movements, asks in a panicked and concerned voice, “Oh my—are you crying, schat?”

Attempting to pull it together once more, you cover your face with your hands and shake your head silently, but your already sniffly nose sells you out. Your shoulders shake with your crying. Too far gone now. 

“I wanted—“ you sniffle, and he hands you a tissue from the side table for you to blow your nose into as he stumbles out and off of you. “I wanted to be with you tonight, but I just—so much—I never—I never listened to your memo, I couldn’t, I had to finish so much before you got here and I couldn’t and I feel so bad, like, you wrote a song about me and I didn’t even have the time to listen—” 

“Shh, shh, shh, shh,” Joost coos, brushing your hair out of your eyes as you sob. “Baby, please.” His expression is so concerned, eyebrows furrowed as he pats your back. “Wait, shit,” he says, getting up from the couch and looking down at his still bare bottom half. “Let me put everything back on, I’m sorry schatje, give me—“ In a hurry, he puts his underwear and shorts back on, tripping over himself and almost falling over. “I just can’t do this naked, I’m sorry.” 

That brings a laugh out of you and a laugh out of him, and you start explaining as he sits back down next to you, rubbing your arm. “I don’t—I don’t deserve you.” You shake your head, wiping your eyes with the backs of your hands. “I should’ve listened to what you sent me, I should’ve been there more.” 

“Bro,” he deadpans, beckoning you to come and sit on his lap. 

You do, still trying to get the tears out of your eyes as you settle into his arms. “Shut up, don’t call me bro while I’m crying,” you laugh, voice weak but lighthearted.

“Bro. I will do it again.” Joost gives you a second to let it out more, to breathe as he smooths his hands back and forth on your back. “You did everything perfectly, lieverd. Perfectly. We were both so busy, and you still made time to call me and text me. I would have been lost without you, I know for certain.” 

You shake your head. “I forgot to reply and pick up your texts so many times, Joost, I felt like such a bad person for doing so.” 

“You did? I didn’t notice. All I cared about was that you replied.  You’re not a bad person at all,” Joost says, and the sweetness of his words just make you want to cry more. “I appreciate more from you the effort that you put into everything, into what we have. Not what you couldn’t or didn’t do.” 

“You’re so nice,” you whisper, sniffling. You can’t think of a better compliment with how overwhelmed you are, so you kiss him, instead, and he kisses back. Even with this, you can tell how gentle Joost is holding your cracked pieces back together. 

“I’m nice?” he asks, smiling. “Best compliment I’ve ever gotten.” For a little, you both sit there in the silence together. “How about this—tomorrow, we can have a day to ourselves. You can lounge and study by the pool, and I’ll be your little butler or whoever and we can just relax for a bit, hm? Order food, drink, smoke, whatever.” Pausing, he grins. “We can even listen to the whole album, if you want.”

“You finished it?” you ask, sitting up more and incredulous. That’s complete news to you.

“This morning, right before I flew back here,” Joost says, nodding proudly. “I also texted you, but duty calls, no?” 

“You texted me?” He texted you? And you missed it?!?!? Again, the new information makes you cry, and he holds you tight as you do. “You should be mad that I didn’t see it,” you say in between dry heaves into his shoulder. “I’m so proud of you.” 

“I could never be mad at you, lieverd, and I’m sorry I made you cry again,” he says, rubbing your back, petting your hair. “I just wanted to let you know when I did it—it was just a timestamp, that doesn’t mean you needed to know right that second.” 

“But I wanted to know.” 

“You know now, and I know how proud you are of me. That’s enough, that’s even more than what I wanted.” You trust him and his words so fully, every passing second with him is another way to help you feel better. “I love you,” Joost says your name so seriously, a punctuation to his love letter. “I mean it.” 

“I love you too.” You kiss him, deeply, moments passing that you use to thank everything you can that he’s so good with your worries, your anxieties. “I’ll take you up on that offer for tomorrow, Joost,” you say, finally calmed down enough. Your eyes are incredibly bleary—you didn’t know that was possible. But at least you aren’t actively crying anymore. “Thank you for everything.” 

“Thank you for giving me something more to look forward to, schat. Now—let’s go run a bath together and listen to my song for you.” 

[spookykoolkat]

summer breeze | eddie munson 18+

wrote a drabble cus im just thinking about drugdealer!eddie at a party (ones that hes tired of going to) to sell and make money, but you take him completely off of his game once he notices you.

drugdealer!eddie x plus sized!fem!reader

warnings: 18+ only! minors do not interact or get BLOCKED. pwp (sorta), eddie and reader are both in their early twenties (eddie is a year or two older than reader), flirting, p in v (protected pls wrap it up!), fingering, mentions of oral (fem receiving), descriptions of feminine fat bodies, itsyyy bit of body issues (reader isn't insecure just aware of her body), very light choking if you squint, dirty talk (i think hes filthy here), body worship, use of pretty girl, daddy, baby, sweetheart, etc lmk if i missed something.

please do not forget to read and educate yourself on the genocide in gaza! please do your daily clicks and donate to families in need for sudan, congo and palestine + more. https://arab.org/ scroll down on my page for resources and posts about palestine! it will always be free palestine and boycotting the show stranger things as there are three raging zionists on set! no longer taking requests for stranger things or tlou!

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i definitely see eddie munson being the one that's invited to the party to make money, find customers, manage to provide the entire party with weed and other drugs people wanted. maybe he's not the most fun, given he was burnt out after his teen years from doing crazy shit like trying pills and psychedelics to skipping class to drive two towns over, drinking and partying to make up for a life time.

he's not there to necessarily party. he's there to make money, drink, and observe. he doesn't even really miss the partying, or the people. since he was the plug, it was only ever about business. how much can someone get, what can they get, for what price, thanks, have a good night. he didn't get much socialization done in his life right now, so his best bet was to just watch.

he took his place on the couch, somewhere in the clouded area of the living room of whoever's house he's in right now. it was almost deja vu for him.

eddie would be SUCH an observer. quiet, listening and watching to everyone and everything since he was always in the corner unless he was needed. so when his eyes scanned the room after taking a puff of his blunt, it wasn't odd that his eyes latched onto you first.

you were wearing your usual, tube top, fishnet and jean shorts that rode up your ass and hugged the dips of your hips and waist. i think eddie tried to stop looking at you, especially when you saw him staring from your spot where you poured yourself another drink. but even you catching him didn't make him have any shame.

he was checking you out unabashedly. he was staring at the way your tits squeezed against the fabric of the tube top, how your tummy poked out of your shorts because they squeezed into your curves, how the fishnets had holes in some spots on your legs probably from stretching over the width of your thighs.

i think eddie would definitely try to make a move on you, his confidence wasn't lost on him, but he would wait. and while he would wait, he would think about touching you, talking to you, maybe even talking you through it.

he was a freak.

he waited until you finally decided to dance with a few of your friends, getting up from his spot and mixing in between the bodies to get next to you. eddie wasn't a dancer. not in these settings, even he surprised himself.

the obsession was mutual. your hands couldn't stop touching him as you two danced, whispering little things in each other's ears.

"you're really fucking pretty, you know that? like, insanely pretty. i couldn't stop looking at you from across the room." his voice was all you heard even when the music tried to drown it out, he was the only one you could listen to.

"eddie right?" you asked in his ear and your voice was even sweeter than he thought. he just nodded and let his hands fall onto your hips.

"you think i'm pretty?" you asked, your eyes fluttering up at him and biting your lip.

eddie only put his hands on your waist and squeezed, pulling you into him and smiling as you both danced together. putting your hands on his chest as he moved his hands to the lower part of your back and dipping his finger tips into your shorts, he leaned down and whispered in your ear,

"more than pretty. can't even focus on my job when you're right there in front of me just begging for me to come and take you away."

your eyes flutters again, this time with your lips parted and small hitch in your throat.

it was the same expression you had that night, upstairs in the guest room as everyone partied below you when he pushed his fingers inside of your heat.

"oh, ooh baby," he would say as he watched your cunt suck his fingers in, coating him in your juices and making a mess over his hand.

"i-i'm, eddie, oh my god eddie," you groaned, jean shorts discarded and panties moved to the side as he played with your cunt.

his hands ripped the fishnets between your thighs, letting his fingers spread the thick of your cunt and press his finger pads onto the glistening pearl that made you flutter your eyes shut.

it was the same expression you gave when he pushed his length into your sopping heat, and grabbed onto every inch of skin he could. once he entered you after making you cum on his fingers, he got eager.

eddie pulled your top down and let your tits free, becoming even more obsessed you might end up having to put a restraining order on him. it turned out, eddie was a tit man. he played with your tits as he slid in and out of you, squeezing your pebbled nipples and teasing them. sucking on his fingers just to play with your nipples, grabbing your tits and pushing them together to watch them bounce as he fucked you.

he was in love.

you didn't know eddie much, but he took his time with you. even when the party seemed to get even more rowdy, he only fucked into you harder. his hips snapping against your thighs, now calves on his shoulders as he quickly grabbed a pillow and slid it under the small of your back.

"my fucking god, sweetheart, look at you," he said, slipping back into you and adding a stretch that added to your pleasure, "even fuckin' prettier like this, you know that? goddamn, i'm gonna fucking get addicted to this pussy,"

the wind had been knocked out of you, breathless and scrambling for something to say but without missing a beat eddie ran his fingers through his hair and grabbed your ankles, spreading your legs wide beside him to see you open for him.

"i, i, daddy please, i can't, too much, can't breathe," you could feel his cock in your throat, punching into you and making your legs twitch at his lace.

"just like that, pretty girl, hold yourself open like that, be good for daddy." he groaned, sitting on his knees to slide back into your gaping hole as you placed your hands on the back of your thighs.

"there we go, so fuckin' good, so pretty," he whispered to himself, watching as tears ruined your perfect makeup and sweat collected on your forehead and chest. you were ruined, aching and throbbing, still begging for him even when he was giving you what you wanted.

"please, please, so fucking good s' so fucking big," you said, out of breath as he moved to your liking.

he couldn't fuck you like that for long, not when he was watching the weight of your tits bounce and move to the rhythm of his thrusts, not when you begged for him, not when he looked at the way your legs pressed against your stomach that was so soft and round for him—now becoming his favorite part to touch as he lifts himself from his knees and putting his weight into your waist.

he got a good grip like this, you thought, feeling how his hands molded into the skin you bashed for so long just to fuck you deeper and more relentlessly.

it was when someone knocked on the door, asking for eddie, (after your second orgasm) when he decided to flip the two of you over so that his back was now against the random headboard of the bed and your thighs sat on top of his.

you were positioned at his tip, most of him sliding out after your orgasm pushed him out. you couldn't help but feel yourself drip onto his length as you looked at the state of him, hearing the man call for his friend outside of the door, and watching as eddie got lost in your curves and softness.

"fucking hell. goddamnit, look at you," he breathed, hands moving all over you, "this will never leave my mind. i'm telling you right now. gonna be thinking about this for fucking ever, thinking about this pretty fucking body on me,"

he was touching everything, all over you, squeezing parts of you you'd never though you'd let anyone see. kissing the stretch marks and moles and the extra flab of your arms and leaning you back to kiss the width of your tummy.

"sit down on me, baby, please, let me have it, let daddy have it, i've been real good for you, baby," he begged, whined, pressing the side of his face into your tits and gently suckling on the skin.

he was growing tiresome, feeling your hole clench around his weeping, red tip that ached for you. eddie didn't even realize he could throb this hard for anyone, or that he even wanted anyone as bad as he wanted you when he saw you. he didn't even know he could last as long as he did, not with you being right in front of him begging for him to fuck you.

you were beautiful, you had something about you that he couldn't take his eyes off of, something he knew he wasn't going to stop thinking about even if he tried.

"but, they're asking for you," you whimpered, fingers dragging through eddie's hair and fingernails scraping his scalp as he groped your tits and sucked on them. "the party, you have customers,"

he leaves kisses when he speaks again.

"the fuck does that matter, hm? as far as i'm concerned," he said and leaned back, watching the way your cunt looked so he could remember every detail. how juicy your cunt was, how he could palm it and rub your clit at the same time, how well your cunt wrapped around his cock when he gave everything for you to take,

"i got the prettiest, juiciest fucking pussy i've ever had in my fuckin' life right here about to sit on my cock, you think i'm gonna stop trying to make you cum so i can get a 20 dollar bill?" he scoffed, "absolutely fuckin' not. fuck that party. now let me fuck that pretty cunt baby, please, let me feel it again,"

he whimpered when he met your eyes, desperation for a nut especially like this, and you melted. you clenched around his tip and he winced as you slowly lowered yourself onto him. you were gasping at this point, trying to fight for air while you let your cunt take all of him until your clit was pressed against his thatch of hair.

"oh fuck, FUCK, fuck baby," he practically yelled, throwing his head back against the headboard and you couldn't help yourself. his hands were gripping your asscheeks so hard they left hand prints, pulling and spreading them apart just to leave slaps to imagine how your ass would jiggle with it.

it left him moaning even more.

your lips attached to his neck and kissed everywhere you could, licking his pale skin and sucking on his neck and chest. you left hickies where you could. the soberness in you wanted him to remember this, to be looked at so people can know someone fucked him this good and it was you.

the drunk in you just wanted to claim him as yours. let everyone know he was fucking you. and only you. or so you convinced yourself to think.

as you buried your face into his neck and suckled and licked, your cunt clenched around him and slowly you lifted your hips up, just to slam them back down and make lewd noises fill the room. his moaning was turning you on even more, knowing his was sounding fucked out like this because of you.

"eddie, yo what the fuck? i'm tryin' to get some weed man! come on!" the obnoxious voice was drowned out by eddie's moans and whimpers as you decided to speed your bouncing up.

you did it for a hot minute, rolling your hips and bouncing your ass on your knees as you took him in with every lift of your hips. he was so much more filling this way, so much more bigger and reaching places it felt like was your stomach.

"eddie, e-eddie, p-p-please, eddie," you were crying into his neck when you whined and it only made him release a guttural groan as he quickly wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled your body down to his.

"eddie, what, wh-" you tried as he fixed positions, planting his feet and raising his hips before continuously slamming up into your cunt.

"oh, oh, oh my, f-fucking, mmphf, my," you really tried, to make sense of what he was doing until your mind went blank, until you felt the head of his pink cock hitting your cervix over and over again until it began to mix pleasure with pain.

it was delicious, it was everything, and yet the man was still at the door. "eddie, eddie," you moaned, sort of forgetting about everything else but the man ramming into your sore hole, you corrected yourself quickly as he fucked you harder, "daddy!"

"woah, hey, are you, are you fucking in there?? eddie!!! my man!!" the man cheered through the door but to you it was muffled.

you couldn't hear anything but the messiness of your cunt, the squelching, the groaning and crying, the moaning and whimpering, his words making you tighten around him.

"take that fucking dick, baby, take what daddy's giving you, yeah?" he growled in your ear as he kept his pace up, your tears hitting his shoulders and your whines being muffled by his chest.

"i know baby, you're taking me so well, being so good, feel so fucking good,"

"cmon baby, let me have another one, cum again for daddy,"

"next time i'm gonna bury my fucking face between those thighs and let your ride my tongue, just wanna taste my pretty girl the right way," he was breathless, and listening to you cry from his words and beg after every sweet nothing he couldn't hold it anymore.

"get it man!" again. eddie was almost getting pissed off. actually. he was pissed off.

this random man was able to hear the way you sounded just for eddie, the way you called for him and said his name, the way you cried when his cock hit your spot over and over again in this angle.

"get the fuck out of here, fuckface!" eddie screamed angrily away from your ear, only making you clench harder as he then flipped you to lay on your side.

his cock was still inside of you, only now he laid behind you in the same position and lifted your leg by the thickness of your thigh and held it there as he lifted his thigh and slipped further inside of you.

"m' the only one that should hear you like this, not him, nobody else. look at that," he says in your ear as he uses his other hand to point your head downwards to see the way his cock slammed into your cunt over and over again, barely being able to see it over your tummy, "see how she's crying for me? god i wish you could fuckin' see yourself, how fuckin' pretty you are,"

"daddy, daddy, fuck, fuck me, fuck my pussy please, make me feel good," you managed to get out as he moved his hand from your hair to your throat, forcing you to throw your head back against his.

eddie puts his chin right at the top of your head, somehow seemingly bigger than you and crowding you as he kept his pace.

"touch yourself, princess, touch that pretty little clit for daddy, daddy's gonna make you cum all over his big fucking cock, how's that sound, pretty girl? you like that?" he asks, and you can hear the smirk in his voice.

it only grows deeper when he sees your weak hand move to your messy cunt, finding your clit and rubbing firm circles into her. eddie can feel you clench and drip onto him, covering his cock in your cum and juices as you reach your climax for the third time.

you didn't know eddie. he didn't really know you. but in this moment, holding you to his chest as you leaves kisses in your hair and on your cheek sweetly, fucking you roughly and messily, palm still at your throat.

you were crying by now, tears slipping down just for eddie to dry them back up.

"i know, i can feel you baby, can feel you gettin' close for me," he boasts, his own thrusts getting sloppy and missing the rhythm as he struggles to hold his own release back.

"so good, feels so good daddy," you gasped, voice dry and strained, "gonna make, fuck fuck, baby i can't, too much,"

"uh-uh baby, what were you gonna say? gonna make you what? cum? gonna make this pretty little cunt cum all over my cock again?" eddie's balls pulled taut, fighting back his orgasm until you clenched hard one last time and yelled out.

"yes! yes! yes! make me cum, you're making me cum, i'm cumming, daddy please," you shouted, body shaking in his hold as you move your hands to grab at his wrist and try to wriggle out of his grasp, his thrusts becoming too much too fast.

"oh fuck, oh fuck, baby, fuck," he whimpered, wincing and releasing a string of moans and groans as he cums in the condom; desperately wishing he could've painted your walls. you were still shaking in his grasp, whimpering when eddie pulls out of you and moves his hands to fix your hair.

eddie moves you to lay on your back as he sits up on one arm and admires you, the lipstick smeared and eyeshadow messy, eyeliner running and your face makeup staining whatever pillows were there.

eddie wasn't the type to think he was going to call back. thats for sure. he wasn't a dating man, a 'see you more than once in a year' man. eddie was confused for the most part, not knowing where this was gonna go next depending how he went about this last part of the interaction. he especially wasn't a girl. not that girl who asked what we are on the first hook up. not the girl who day dreamed about someone when they weren't near.

he wasn't a girl. he especially wasn't that girl.

you opened your eyes to him staring with a lopsided smile, scanning over your face and chest.

"what?" you smiled, breathlessly and sleep pulling at your eyes.

he shakes his head with a small smile and drowns out the music playing from downstairs, watching you scan his face.

"so, are you gonna call me after this? when can i see you again?"

[lyrefromthesea]

how would the pillars celebrate the birthday of their S/O? :P

Male pillars x Reader - Happy Birthday

pairing: Tengen x reader, Obanai x reader, Rengoku x reader, Sanemi x reader, Giyuu x reader, Gyomei x reader

content warning: none

Tengen:

• just like him, he makes it flashy

• invites multiple people, variety of food and drinks

• will make sure to put you in the spotlight

• only gives you one or two presents, but they have a deep meaning

you swore your social batteries had died down an hour ago, not sure when this party would end. you had been happy upon coming home and seeing the people you loved congratulate you, but everything needed to end.

right before you were about to tell Tengen that you were exhausted and needed to excuse yourself, you could see him come towards you with a gift in hand.

it was.. weirdly simply. it wasn't presented like the rest of his flashy party for you, but put in a small black box.

"for you, beautiful." he said, gently placing the box in your hand. glancing up at him, as if you wanted reassurance, you slowly removed the lid of the small black box.

your eyes widened upon seeing a small necklace, a beautiful gem attached to it. you knew what it was, he had precisely picked your birthstone.

"Tengen.." you murmured, taking the necklace out with the outmost care. would it be embarrassing to cry now? yes. did you still do it? yes.

"i'm glad you like it, beautiful."

Obanai:

• hates his own birthdays and now hates them in general

• against big parties and multiple people entering his private walls

• still appreciates you and wants to show you his love

• almost embarrassed when he hands you his present

"happy birthday.." he mumbled, head tilted down. he wasn't used to giving people gifts - especially not the people he liked most.

you awed silently, your fingers brushing against his when you took the present out of his hand.

he had probably wrapped it up himself, much better than one would have expected, but you could still see small flaws - not that you would ever care.

you wanted to open it, but his shy demeanor held you back. he had done something incredible sweet, you wanted to thank him.

"this is so sweet, thank you, Obanai.." you answered, placing the gift down to hold his hand affectionately. he flinched lightly, almost as if he was falling out of a trance.

"it's not sweet, it's what you deserve. if i didn't show you how much i love you, would i really deserve this? you're the serpent of my heart.." his words were clearly spoken with love, making you place a soft kiss against his cheek.

you would've kissed him on the lips, but he unfortunately wore his mask. nevertheless, a small chuckle escaped you, finding his cheesy formulation endearing.

"that was quite cute of you, sometimes i forgot that you're such a softie.."

Rengoku:

• completely against not celebrating your birthday

• doesn't know how to organize a grand party, wouldn't do it anyways

• invites the people closest to you

• probably collected a series of gifts over the months because they reminded him of you

"and here! these are all for you, i hope they'll bring you pleasure!" he beamed, carrying a small load of presents in his arms. you watched with wide eyes as he placed them on the table in front of you.

naturally, you looked at the other guests, knowing they must've been as surprised as you. however, when none of them even batted an eye, you seemed even more confused.

"he would ask us if you'd like them. you're the only one that didn't know.." one of them chuckled, eventually turning into a shared laughter.

of course this was unusual, but with the man you loved and the people you treasured the most, you couldn't complain at all.

Sanemi:

• doesn't celebrate his own birthday, will not celebrate yours either

• still shows you that he knows it's your special day

• good morning kiss + congratulations, small acts of service

• will possibly bring you to some place he thought you would enjoy

"do you like it?" he asked, not staring at you, his eyes were focused on the landscape in front of him. he had brought you to a hill outside town, which held a breathtaking view.

"i like it because you're here with me." you teased, watching his eyes narrow slightly and his lips press together. he didn't like admitting it, but your teasing always managed to get a reaction out of him.

"stop being so cheesy, dumbass." he grumbled, yet his hand reached out towards yours, grabbing it and interlocking your fingers.

you smiled at him, scooting closer and placing your head against his shoulder. "i mean it though. i like being with you."

"thank you for bringing me here" you said, feeling his head slowly rest on yours.

no, he wasn't good with words, nor did he know how to properly celebrate a birthday, but he made you feel special in his own way.

Giyuu:

• another person that doesn't celebrate his birthday, he had no one to celebrate

• was in awe when you celebrated his birthday for the first time and wanted to do the same for you

• asked for help - likely Tanjiro or Shinobu - on how to celebrate your birthday

• eventually bought you a present and cake

"Giyuu?" you asked, tilting your head at the man standing in front of you. you had instantly noticed the small cake on the table and the way he held his arms behind him.

he cleared his throat, as if he wanted to swallow down his insecurities. if you weren't so worried, you would've propably chuckled. but right now, you could only focus on the way he looked so unsure of himself.

"i.. happy birthday.." he finally said, stepping to the side. you looked at the cake, now in full view - it was your favourite. "i thought you would like it.. i also got you this.."

your eyes followed his hands, seeing him take out a small present. it was wrapped in blue paper, a small smile forming on your lips.

"thank you, Giyuu." you responded, but instead of taking the present out of his hands, you wrapped your arms around him. mildly confused, he placed the gift down, returning your hug.

"i want to celebrate all of your birthdays from now on, love.."

Gyomei:

• definitely likes the idea of celebrating your birthday

• truthfully a bit clueless about where to start, decides to ask for help

• ends up planning your birthday together with a few people you know and like

• calm party, somehow makes you feel at home every time.

"you didn't have to..!" you gasped, your eyes widening when Gyomei brought you into the garden. the sun had already set, but small lights were drenching your surroundings in a homely light.

"do you like it?" he asked, hearing your hair sway lightly as you turned your head in different directions. people were congratulating you from different corners, warm smiles on their faces.

after a moment of pure fascination and a throbbing heart, you looked at him in awe. "i love it."

"i'm glad, we've prepared a few other things for you.." he answered, his warm hand grabbing yours softly and bringing you closer to the others.

another gasp escaped you when you saw your favourite food on the table, a few side dishes making everyone gather around the table.

"there are a few presents for you too." he continued, nodding to the side. your gaze followed, wide eyes watching a dozen of packages sit patiently on another table.

feeling lonely is normal, but it is impossible when you experience this kind of love.

[k8martins]

guilty as sin ୨୧

summary: teammate!reader and kate are urged to stop crushing on each other because it interferes with their gameplay, leading to tension

warnings: angst, fluff towards the end

a/n: based on the song guilty as sin by tswift! i don’t listen to her so i hope i did this right lmfao

ever since coach bluder sat you down and chatted with you about kate, you hadn’t been speaking to her very much. before the mandatory meeting with bluder, you and kate had undoubtedly been feverishly crushing on each other to the point of it interfering with how both girls played; in and out of practice. plays being disrupted, catching fouls, and missing shots had all been a result of being too focused on kate. she was the only girl on your mind, and you were dedicated to being near each other all the time. you were told to either get it together, or forget the idea of being romantically involved with her. it was obvious the connection was still there, but you both agreed with bluder and ended up not interacting as much besides being on the court.

one specific moment in the locker room confirmed your distance from kate. you had arrived late to practice and was already irritated, when kate came in for a bathroom break. just you two in the room, she tried to negotiate the separation.

“you know…” she started out cautiously, “we don’t have to listen to coach bluder if we don’t wan-“

“kate please just let it go,” you urged, as if bluder was listening. it was hard enough to say that, but kate persisted.

“i’m serious, i still really like you.”

she was making it harder and harder. you helplessly dropped your arms to your sides, uncomfortable with the confrontation, but wanted to make yourself clear.

“i still like you too. so much. i really wanted it to work but bluder and the other coaches are right. so are our teammates,” you began. a drawn out pause followed your words, and you continued.

“i mean, everyone has seen how this is just getting in the way of how we play, kate. we can’t get anything done because we’re too focused on each other,” you said, exasperated and voice trembling with emotion. kate gazed at you with the same helplessness, but both of you knew it wasn’t over.

this cage was once just fine

am i allowed to cry?

the forced distance apart only seemed to strengthen the feelings between you and kate. although you hadn’t exactly been flirting anymore, it was like you were convinced everything she did was a sign towards you; and each word from her mouth a symbolic message. you would see the glimmer in kate’s eyes as they would linger on yours for an extra moment during team huddles, certain that she could read your thoughts. as much as you loved hearing her voice as team captain, it would frequently get drowned out by all the wild things you wanted with her.

i keep recalling things we never did

messy top lip kiss

at times it felt unfair; as you and kate never got the chance to advance to something more serious. all you experienced was touchiness and bold flirting with nothing more. you wanted so badly to be something more with her, do something more. but every time you stared at kate a little too long during practice, bluder saw right through both of you. petty little sidecourt lectures weren’t your thing, but it wasn’t like you could just give up on kate that easily.

several practices and games went by with no progress in advancing with kate. in fact, the sexual tension once so familiar turned to irritable tension. even through the passive aggressiveness and pointless bickering on the court, your desire for kate was growing unbearable. her scolding you became a new source of interest, almost trying to get her mad at you.

“you’re acting like you’ve never done this before,” kate’s stern voice called out to you. it was nearing the end of an exhaustive practice getting ready for the next day’s game, and you were at the end of your wits.

unsure of how to reply, you stood there after messing up your defensive play, ball on your hip. you stared at her knowingly, but kate did not take your silence as an answer.

“can you stop standing there and actually do something?”

“can you actually act like a captain instead of just bossing me around,” you shot back coldly, maintaining eye contact.

kate paused and shifted in her stance. she took a moment to look away from you, either thinking or making sure nobody’s near, and promptly returned her gaze. almost without missing a beat, kate lowered her voice.

“what if i wasn’t talking about basketball.”

her unexpected question flustered you, making your eyebrows furrow and break the eye contact. it was embarrassing how quickly she made your heartbeat skyrocket. you knew it was exactly what you wanted her to say, but kept up with the act.

“kate, not now, not here.”

she scoffed and looked around once more before stepping even closer to you. she kept her head low along with her voice when talking to you, although she seemed to not care about keeping distance anymore. if coaches came around at any moment, you were sure she wouldn’t budge.

“you know you want to.”

why does it feel like a vow

we’ll both uphold somehow

the look in your eyes changed from resentment to need. every time she cornered you like this, it was like you and her magically became the only two on the court. kate managed to move even closer to you, and your eyes were stuck on her. your mouth hung open as you trusted words would come out, but the illusion was quickly broken away when you felt a firm pat on your shoulder.

looking behind you, coach bluder was standing there expectantly, her eyes darting back and forth between you and kate. the look in her eyes was apparent, but she went easy on you.

“practice is over, girls. go head in.”

you slowly began to step away from kate, your eyes still fixated on her before you turned around and picked up your pace. from behind you, you heard coach bluder order kate to stick around a bit longer for a talk with the other coaches. half of you was relieved to not walk in the locker room with her, but the other half wanted to.

when you joined your teammates in the locker room, their lively chatter seemed to dissipate as they saw you come in. they knew of your situation with kate and used to be supportive, but now backed off since the angst began. some were even convinced that kate was bullying you.

“you really shouldn’t let her talk to you like that,” jada encouraged.

already over what they had to say, you side eyed her and just tried to continue getting ready to go home.

“you’re seriously just gonna let her be that way?”

“jada, i don’t care. i just don’t,” you practically snapped at her, “plus, you guys don’t even know what she said to me.”

jada was taken aback at your sudden defensiveness.

“girl the whole gym heard her yell at you,” jada pressed.

“she wasn’t yelling at me. you guys don’t even know what’s going on, just stay out of it please,” you said, turning away from her. the interaction alone made you replay the moment with kate a hundred times over again.

they don’t know how you’ve haunted me

so stunningly

after losing the next day’s game at home, it was only a matter of time before you ran into kate again. you were truthfully waiting for it to happen, and the exact event did happen when walking out of the arena after the game. you were one of the only girls on the team to leave out the back door; a typically lonely walk to your car. kate knew this and took it to her advantage. so when you stepped into the cold night and saw her leaning against the wall, it didn’t surprise you.

“don’t get mad at me yet,” kate’s said smoothly.

the look on her face and tone in her voice told you she was being genuine, and you felt no need to be tense. you unclenched your jaw and dropped your shoulders. in fact, kate seemed to be the nervous one this time.

“kate what are you doing out here, it’s freezing,” you questioned, wrapping your arms around yourself.

she stood up from against the wall and inched towards you, seeming to really think about her words before saying them.

“i know we’ve been mean to each other lately and,” kate paused, maintaining eye contact to confirm your agreement, “and i think we both know it’s bullshit.”

her words were soft, but truthful and deliberate as they came out. it was like the fourth wall was broken with the acknowledgment of the act you two had been keeping up, and it was a relief to know she wanted it to end too. still, she was taking it a little too slow, and it only seemed to get colder outside.

“kate if that’s what this is about-“ you started to turn away, but kate promptly grabbed your wrist and faced you back to her. you realized she was being serious.

“please, just hear me out. i want to make things right again,” kate begged, her hand still around your wrist.

you looked around the dark parking lot, remaining paranoid of anyone who might hear the interaction. the only lights illuminating your faces were high up on the arena walls, and no one else appeared to be in the area. looking back at kate, she was looking back intently, waiting for a response.

“kate... you were pretty mean to me,” you replied honestly, but still wanting to work things out. she blinked and took a deep breath, realizing it might not have been as easy as she thought.

“you’re right,” she said nodding, “i’ve been a fucking asshole to you. i yelled at you when i was supposed to help you, i embarrassed you, i...i have no excuse.”

“so what now...we’re just supposed to act like we didn’t hate each other for weeks?”

between losing the game, being tired, and the coldness of the night, it was turning into a bit of an argument. you didn’t want it to, but weeks of taking shots at each other wasn’t easy to forget. kate’s mouth hung slightly open without words, and you could see her exasperated huffs into the air. she remained silent.

“seriously, i mean it never had to be like this,” you said, narrowing your eyes and moving your head away. without missing a beat, kate took her hand up to your cheek and moved your head back to her.

“just look at me...”

her hand ever so slightly touched your face, almost hovering, as if the world would implode if she touched you fully. although you were being stubborn, her tone remained patient and calm. with her hand rested on your face and the other hand finding its way back to yours, it suddenly felt like nothing had ever changed. the way her hand perfectly cradled yours and gave it a gentle squeeze made you feel like you never fell out with her at all.

the gentle squeeze of your hand was thought to be permission, as kate lowered her hand down to your jaw and held your face closer to hers. you weren’t sure there were any words needed, but you spoke anyway.

“kate, please,” you were now whispering, just inches away from her lips, and that was all it took.

you could feel the longing and anticipation in the kiss, the way kate’s lips pressed on yours so softly, yet biting down on your bottom lip. the kiss flowed back and forth, electrifying both of you in the way you needed it most. kate ran her hand down your neck and your arm, testing how you reacted to her touch. you needed more so desperately, cupping her face in your hands. it felt like hours had gone by after just several seconds, and you broke the kiss to take a breath.

these fatal fantasies

giving way to labored breath

kate’s forehead was pressed against yours as you caught your breath and began smiling. the intense kiss made you forget about the nightly cold, and instead gave way for warmth. kate kept her hands on your arms, giving them a gentle squeeze as if you’d disappear right then.

“was that ok?” kate questioned.

you laughed at her sheepish question, nodding your head. “i’ve been waiting for that forever, kate.”

taking all of me

we’ve already done it in my head

both girls decided making out in the middle of the night outside your basketball arena wasn’t very ideal. it was also decided you couldn’t just part ways after exchanging such a telling kiss, and kate allowed you to follow her back to her apartment. there was no practice the next day, and neither of you were busy.

kate’s apartment was a cozy little place, with just enough room for the both of you. you imagined all the times you could’ve been in her apartment before, if you had just been able to work it out earlier. you collapsed on her bed and didn’t even give any mind to getting unready. all you knew was that you were about to be lying in bed with your love, and there was an open day ahead of you.

once kate was done with her night routine, she joined you in bed. neither of you had the energy for anything more than a few short kisses peppered all over her face and head. being held by kate felt so right, and you were sure making up with her was the right decision. with your head rested on kate’s chest, she planted one last kiss to your head before whispering goodnight.

what if the way you hold me

is actually what’s holy?

[moonstruckme]

James Potter or tasm!peter parker fluff or comfort?? I dont mind whatever you write ill love 🙏🙏

Thanks for requesting :)

cw: implied past abuse

tasm!Peter Parker x fem!reader ♡ 1.2k words

Peter’s having a rough week. These things always seem to happen to him. He’s got a big presentation at work on Friday, by which time the project he’s been underfunded and understaffed for has to be finished. His Aunt May has been busy with work, too, so either you or Peter is at her place most nights trying to help out, except she seems to think when it’s Peter it’s familial responsibility but when it’s you it's an unfair burden, so it’s mostly been Peter. There’s also an impressively organized cell of criminals he’s been trying to investigate before they blow up a bank or something. So of course, he’s sleep deprived to boot. 

And while you know the rough edge of frustration in his voice isn’t meant for you, hearing it makes your skin tighten nonetheless. 

“How does a person run out of salt?” Peter stalks through the front door and straight into the kitchen. “Or maybe the better question is, why does it take going to three bodegas to find one with salt in stock?”  

He’s soaked from the rain, and you feel guilty for being all cozied up on the couch while he’s been running around the city. Maybe it’s irrational, but you feel sort of like you should have been stressed out and cold all night, too. In solidarity. 

“May didn’t have salt?” you guess as Peter opens the fridge, stooping low to peer inside. 

“You should see her pantry, babe. It’s like everything either expired at the turn of the century or got bugs in it. Hey, did you make anything for dinner?” 

“No.” You hesitate. “You told me you wanted to eat at May’s, so I had the leftovers from last night.” 

“Shit.” He closes the fridge, resting his forehead on the door. “You’re right. I totally forgot, I only made enough for her.” 

“I’ll make something now.” You stand. Peter gives you a look that conveys both apology and gratitude as you join him in your small kitchen. “You feel like pasta?” 

“Thank you,” he says, kissing the top of your head lightly. 

“Course,” you murmur. Really, it feels like the least you can do. “Would you mind chopping up some basil?” 

“For my own dinner?” Peter teases. The levity in his voice is obviously forced, and the air between you heavies as he realizes you’ve heard it too. 

You almost don’t want to ask, but you do want to be a supportive girlfriend. You can lend him a compassionate ear. “How was work today?” 

He sighs, grabbing the cutting board from a cabinet near your feet and shutting the door with perhaps a tad too much force. 

“It was…ahh.” He scrubs a hand through his hair, stooping again into the white fridge light to find the basil. It casts dark shadows underneath his eyes. “You’ve gotta be sick of hearing about this.” 

“It’s okay. Unless you don’t feel like talking about it.” 

“No, it’s just, how do they expect us to stick to their tight schedule when half of my lab is being pulled away to other projects all the time?” Peter’s knife slices through the basil, hitting the cutting board with a sharp thunk. “Today, we were down one intern who caught the stomach flu, and it set us way back. One intern shouldn’t be that crucial to a big project like this!” 

You hum, ignoring the way the back of your neck prickles. The tension emanating from Peter is completely valid, your reaction a bothersome, purposeless souvenir from an old life. You find yourself staring into the pot of water and waiting for it to boil. 

“And it’s not like it’s anyone’s fault, but all the rest of us are working extra hours to try and get this done in time.” 

Small bubbles in the bottom of the pot, rising tentatively to the surface. Peter’s knife thunks a quickening rhythm on the cutting board. 

“If they’d given us the money we asked for, we could have hired more people, been working with better equipment, but instead—” The water starts to rumble, steam warming your face. It’s thick in your throat. “—it’s like we don’t even work for a top-notch lab. Like, do they think we really believe they don’t have any resources to spare?”

Peter’s voice is rising, irritation sharpening his words. You reach to turn down the stove when big bubbles reach the surface, splattering hot onto your wrist. You ignore the sting. 

“My boss keeps talking about how important this presentation is,” Peter goes on, opening the cabinet next to your head and reaching inside, “but if it were really important, he’d have—” He slams the cabinet door. 

You both freeze. 

To anyone else, it would look like nothing—the way your expression stays perfectly still, your muscles stiffening just slightly, the invisible pause in your heartbeat. But Peter knows you. 

“Sorry.” He sounds as breathless as you feel. “I’m sorry. You okay?” 

“Mhm.” Despite your best intentions, your voice comes out pitchy. You can’t make yourself move in a way that feels natural, so you stay not moving at all. Steam wafting warm up onto your face. 

“I’m sorry, sweetheart,” Peter says, tone softer than you’ve heard it in days. “I shouldn’t have—I didn’t mean to yell.” The roiling pot has calmed to a gurgle. You can see him swallow in your peripheral vision. “Can you look at me?” 

You take in what you hope is a subtle breath, turning to your boyfriend with a wan smile. “Sorry,” you manage. “I don’t know why I did that.” 

“It’s okay,” he says, brows bunched in the middle. Brown eyes like a puppy’s. 

He shifts his arms, a question, and you step into them. You do it more for him than for you, but the second Peter’s arms wrap around your back the last of the tension shudders out of you. You hug him back, rubbing between his shoulder blades reassuringly. 

“I scared you?” he asks, still in that soft voice like he’s afraid of startling you. It’s not really a question. “I’m sorry, baby. I didn’t mean to get so mad.” 

“You’re allowed to be mad,” you argue weakly. There’s an embarrassing blockage in your throat. “It’s not your fault if I freak out, you should still be allowed to vent.” 

“No, but I know how you are.” Peter squeezes your shoulders. “I can vent without slamming things. It’s not nice.” 

You don’t have much of an argument for that. Still, “You really shouldn’t be the one comforting me right now,” you point out. 

A light hum. “Says who? I’m feeling a lot better already.” His hand climbs up to cup the back of your neck, his face turning down so his lips rest on your head. “Should’a just gone straight for the hug when I got home. Might have saved us both a lot of ranting.” 

You push your face into his sweatshirt, mindless of its dampness. He smells like rainwater. You don’t know how you could ever have thought, even for a second, that someone like this could be capable of hurting you. 

“I’ll make a note of that,” you murmur. 

“Yeah, please do,” Peter teases, pressing a kiss to your head. He pulls away and sets two still-chilled hands on your face. “Are you really okay?” he asks sincerely. “I know how scared you get, sweetheart. I’m so sorry I did that to you.” 

“You didn’t mean to,” you tell him, “and it wouldn’t be your fault anyways. I’m really okay.” 

Your boyfriend nods, but he still looks troubled. “Another hug for good measure?” 

“For you or for me?” 

A corner of his mouth kicks up. “Does it matter?” 

It doesn’t really.

[yandere-sins]

Kicking my feet and twirling my hair at your yandere König and Ghost headcanons💕 could I request some headcanons on how they'd react at escape attempts/successful escapes please?

Of course! Thanks for requesting! ♥

»»———————— ♡ ————————«��

König

♡ One word: panic. It's not a slowly developing feeling, either. When he can't find you in your room, his stomach twists as he waltzes into the bathroom instead. At this point, his pulse begins ringing in his ears, and his breaths come out as slow pushes of air. König realizes how wrong his home feels, how there's no sign of you there, and the panic that overcomes him is just about to explode like a grenade on the battlefield—it builds up and then peng! It's too quiet, too cold, and the thought of you having left is one of pure horror. If anyone would measure his tension, his body would break all means of detecting it, every muscle so taut they could snap at any given moment, and every one of his movements deliberate and deadly. König tries to think about what he's done wrong and why you'd do this to him, but he manages to push these thoughts aside for later. He needs to focus, needs to keep his wits up. Part of him hopes you didn't leave him because you wanted to. Another part hopes very much that you weren't forced to leave him just to spare you from the horrors that you could possibly encounter because of that. Then again, if someone was as bold as to kidnap you, König would at least have an outlet for all the rage, frustration, and madness he is feeling; the thought of breaking some bones suddenly so tempting.

♡ And yet, König is never more in control than in moments like this. Despite his panic and anxiety about losing you, he could never concentrate better than now that he has to get you back. And he has to; he needs to. Needs you. His life is meaningless without you in it, and he needs to cradle you in his arms and know you're okay just so he can fucking breathe again. He has his means of finding out where you are and is not shy about using them. You'll come to dread the day you got stalked by someone so big and tall that it should have been impossible. But once he's behind you, your escape is over, and with it, any other possibility that you'll ever be able to try again. If he has to put you in an underground bunker, tied up and unable to do anything without him, then so be it. But König can't lose you again. He might as well die if you ever manage to get away. Ultimately, it will be his tense, unyielding hands dragging you back, even as he coos sweet promises into your ear. That everything will be okay now, that he'll protect you. But he'll be much more possessive and needy after your attempt, and you only have yourself to blame for what he's going to do with you once he has you back in the safety of his arms.

Ghost

♡ Physically, you might already be far, far away from Ghost. Yet, you can still feel his disappointment and hear him sigh, even if it's all just subconsciously. There's something especially bitter about the fact he went out to get you some nice food you like, thinking about how much he'll enjoy watching you eat it on his way back and imaging the taste on your lips as he steals kisses from you, only to come back to this. Nothing. Emptiness and the remains of his heart getting shredded by explosive bangs of heartache. He thought things were improving between you two, but that escape was on him. He shouldn't have trusted you quite this much, though it really fucking hurts that you did it. He's been good to you, hasn't he? Loved you well, fucked you well, spent all his damn money to make you comfortable. You can run all you want, but you can't deny the few times you leaned in for a cuddle—even if it was subconsciously—or asked him for something, and he got it for you without thinking twice. You might think running is the right option, but are you even aware of what you're running away from? By all means, he was a perfect partner (aside from forcing you into this relationship, but it was for the greater good of you both being together). And yet, you'd betray him like this. Run away when things get rough. When they aren't up to your standards. Ghost must have spoiled you rotten, eh? Pity because he won't make the same mistakes twice.

♡ Ghost doesn't need anyone or anything to track you down. He might have a tracker on you, part of him always admiring your rebellious nature and knowing the day would come, but he knows you. He knows you too well. He studied your thoughts like no one else, perhaps knowing even better than you what you're thinking. And though he's gripping the steering wheel of the car he's using to catch up to you, to the point of either his fingers or the material they're wrapped around cracking, when he does find you, he's eerily calm. He knew the way you'd run, knew which bushes you'd hide behind, and now that he caught up, you really have no choice but to surrender. Ghost wouldn't let you win in a fight on his good days, much less days ruined by your idiocity. So you can choose to get in defeatedly or have him drag you into the car with no guarantee he won't hurt you. It's not like your tears leave him cold. The dead look on your face or how you jerk when he brushes your hair back, feeling like ice picks stabbed into his heart. He hates arguing with you. He hates being angry with you. It's on you this time, though. But at least, if you're cooperative, the only way he'll let you know how mad he is, is by holding your thigh in his hand on the drive, gripping it painfully rigid as he drives you two back, thinking about whether or not to break your leg as a lesson. No promises on if he will act on these thoughts, though—you really messed up this time and deserve the lesson, don't you? Better start appeasing him before you get home, and he gets to have you all to himself again, just like he always wanted.

[ddeunbi]

━━━━━KISS ME UNTIL MY LIPS FALL OFF

PAIRING jake x gn!reader WC ooo GNR fluff, suggestive WRNGS grammar mistakes, kisses, public setting, soccer-player!jake CAMEO huh yunjin of le sserafim ( BOOKSHELF ) for @jakesangel this was supposed to be a hyung line fic, but i decided to turn it onto a jake fic instead since i feel bad; writer's block sucks

your boyfriend had promised to take you to the bakery that you've been wanting to try for weeks today, which explains why you're waiting for your boyfriend to finish his daily basketball practice at the gym. luckily, you don't have to sit on the bench alone today as your best friend, yunjin, is waiting for her cousin to give her a ride home.

you look at the clock in the gym, 3:55 p.m., just 5 minutes more until they're done.

sighing, you rest your head on yunjin's shoulder. she placed her head over yours and wrapped her hand around your shoulder.

"endure it for 15 minutes more, then you can hug and kiss your boyfriend all you want. I don't recommend hugging him, though; he's sweaty" you nudge her side, laughing at her. "hey! it's just my opinion,” yunjin laughed.

"since both of us are bored, tell me about that girl right there." you looked at where yunjin was pointing, only to find the girl that you probably despise the most right now, sitting with her minions. she was the one who always claimed to be jake’s real girlfriend and bothered him everywhere.

"her face is so annoying, I want to punch it," yunjin remarks. you chuckled, knowing that you and her were on the same boat. you hate how she's still following jake everywhere when she knows that he's with you.

just when you're about to tell yunjin more about her, you hear your name being called. you turned your head to the source of the sound, only to find jake winking at you before shooting the ball into the basket. the ball successfully went into the hoop, which filled the whole gym with the sound of shouts. the coach blows the whistle, signaling that it’s the end of the practice

you're never really a fan of public attention, but you started to ignore the feeling of it ever since the two of you got together. you know what you're getting yourself into when you're dating a well-known athlete at the school. it's not like you hate it; you just prefer doing everything in your own space.

"i can't believe i'm saying this but hell, that shit was so cool," you heard yunjin say beside you, clapping her hands. you know yunjin is not really fond of jake; well it’s not like she hates him but rather stays on guard in case jake does something he shouldn’t do.

“go, i’ll manage just fine here. plus my cousin is almost done,” yunjin nudged you once again. “well then, thank you for today jen. if it wasn’t for you, i would look like a lost dog sitting on this bench alone.” you stand up and start gathering your things together to put them in your tote bag. you slid it over your shoulder. yunjin hummed as a response. “you sure you got everything?” she asks, looking around, probably looking for your things.

you chuckle at her and say, "I did. thanks again for today. let's grab ice cream tomorrow, see ya,” you said, giving her a pat on the shoulder. “now that’s more like it! see ya”, yunjin smiles. you wave your goodbye, which she returns not even a second after, and that was your queue to properly go.

the second you reached down, you saw jake waiting for you with his arms wide open, making the smile on your face wider. you ran to him, and wrapped your arms around his neck before kissing him. you could tell that he was shocked at first, but he quickly wrapped his arms around your waist pulling you closer to him. he closed his eyes and returned your kiss. you heard his teammates cheering, but that was the least thing that you cared about right now when you have your precious boyfriend in your arms right now.

you can feel him smile against your lips, probably because of the cheers. one of his hands went on its way to the back of your head, deepening the kiss. his soft lips are glued to yours, noses nudging against each other's.

you were the first one to pull away, resting your forehead against his. you want to kiss his soft lips every second, but the lack of oxygen makes you pull away. you open your eyes only to find him looking at you with so much love.

“bold now, are we?” he smirks. he leans in, hugging you properly. “do that more often; i love it,” he said against your ears, which made you let out a small laugh. you realize the little crowd is now gone; there are only a few people left in the gym. you look at the place where she and her minions sat, only to find an empty chair. they probably left, you thought. 

you smiled to yourself, knowing that in the end, you will always be the one who he hugs and kisses, not some girl that he doesn’t gives a fuck about

jake pulled away, planting a kiss on your temple. “i need to shower and change my clothes; will that be okay for you? i’ll be quick,” he asked. both of his hands are now caressing your hair, looking at you again with the same stare that you’ve come to love. “yeah, take your time. the cafe won’t close until 8 p.m. anyway,” you said, giving him a soft smile.

“perfect, let’s go,” he pecked your lips before taking your hands to interlock his fingers with yours and kissing them.

well, yunjin's advice may have gone over your head.

NANA'S NOTE i should stop disappearing omg

[harveyb-wabbit92]

Grocery girl: Ken Sato x Reader pt. 4

You were a delivery girl who was frequently dispatched to famous baseball player's Ken Sato residence, you were a nobody that anyone hardly paid attention to, until you found the legendary baseball passed out on his front steps looking like hell, being a bit of worry wart you help him inside and that things took a HUGE turn when you find yourself playing mommy for a giant baby dragon….

Part 1, Part 2,Part3

==============================

The thing about being new parents is they go into it not thinking how much it'll change their life. as they build a routine around the baby's care that they often forget that they're still people, and need to take of themselves and each other wise over time the stress will start to boil over. And Ken had reached that boiling point as he came home from the game furious cos he got chewed out by the coach and he took his frustrations out on R/n as soon as he walked through the door.

The aftermath of the argument that ensued left Kenji with a sore cheek and even more bruised ego as R/n stormed out of the house in tears her parting words being "You have no right coming at me like, Sato! I'm not who took in giant baby and forced a stranger to uproot her life, because he's too proud admit that he bit off more than he could chew." Kenji made his way downstairs and felt his legs shake as he made his way towards the baby's containment chamber feeling even more frustrated.

He finally breaks down crying grieving over the stress and trials that came with parenting and driving off the only person that had been trying to help him and what was worst...even if he did go after R/n, he wouldn't know where she would go! in the month that they've lived together; never once had they ever sat down and just have a real conversation that didn't involve the baby. That, and he hadn't exactly been the nicest guy since she moved in with him either.

Mina asked if Ken would like to hit some balls as that usually helps him feel better and started up a simulation of the dodger stadium. Unfortunately Ken's frustrations seem to grow as he missed every pitch thrown his way, Baby watched him curiously and started giggling thinking he was being silly; He eventually got sick of everything and retreated to his room.

He kicked the mini fridge in his couch open finding a single can of coconut water. Ken snorted tried to kick the drawer shut but it was being stubborn after the fourth kick it finally locked and Ken buried his head into his hands. Mina approached him concerned, she explained that Kenji was experiencing a breakdown due to stress, no surprises there. She asked if he would like to participate in a counseling session simulation. Ken didn't want that.

"I need to talk to someone, not something...offense Mina."

"Then perhaps you should call someone, a friend? "

"A friend...Well I just chased out the closest person I could call a...."

"Ken?"

Ken had an idea who to call he ended up calling Ami Wakita for help hopefully she can help him sort his head out and maybe help fix things with R/n, but first he had to come off as subtle as possible so the reporter doesn't suspect his current living situation. Ken waited a rings for Ami answer. "Miss Wakita,. It's Ken, Ken Sato, I need to talk to you." Ami panicked a little thinking Ken calling to complain about her most recent article she'd done on him. "Oh, Mr. Sato. If this is about what I wrote, I'm sorry but I solely write based on what I see-" Ken interrupted her assuring that the reason for him calling had nothing to do with her article, he just needed a minute to talk.

Ami cut him a deal; five minutes of talking and he gives her an exclusive interview, Ken reluctantly agreed her her terms and began talking. He wanted to know how she does make it work? How does she juggle her job while also caring for her family at the same time? "I mean, how did you did not lose it on your partner or resist the urge to throw your kid out a window?" There was a slight pause on the other end and Ken was worried he said too much before Ami spoke. "Ken, do you have a secret wife and child? cos that would make one heck of a story.~" Ken felt his cheeks burn as he firmly denied it Ami snickered assuring him that she was joking.

She told him that parenting was difficult even with two people but it's a rewarding journey and though it can seem bleak and stressful at times, but there's always that awe that comes with these little lives are relying on imperfect you to guide them through it all, even teaching you a few things along the way the feeling you get from experiencing it is... "Incredible..." Ken said in awe as he watched the baby trying to copy him from watching some of his old games.

He asked Mina to lower the kaiju's containment field and managed to get a hold of a giant baseball bat he just randomly had lying around and handed it off to the baby. "...And your five minutes are up!" Amy stated Ken hadn't heard her right away as he was trying to Baby how to swing her bat. "Ken, are you still there?" The baseball players eyes widened as remembered her was on call with her. "Oh, yeah. thanks!" Ami said his thanks can be the exclusive interview he promised. "Ah, right. Let's meet tomorrow at Tonkatsu Tonki in Meguro, around 7?" He hung up before Ami agreed and Ken returned to teaching Baby how to play baseball he had Mina bring up a simulation a baseball field from his childhood complete with his mom cheering him on front the stands.

Ken showed the baby how to hold her bat and went to pitchers mound the first try didn't go so well as Ken had accidentally nailed her in the forehead causing baby to started crying; Ken went to calm her down and reassure her. "It's okay, it happens. We'll try again. this time keep your eye on the ball." Ken went to pitch again and this time baby hit a homerun! Ken and Mina cheered and ran up to the kaiju. "C'mon girl, time to run your bases!" the the baby laughed and chirped giddily as she followed her daddy.

Cut to an hour later the baby has fallen asleep though with some difficulty, Ken learned that R/n would sing to the infant kaiju; which was news to him(he was usually K.O.'d or fighting Kaiju while R/n was on duty.) According to Mina R/n has lovely singing voice. Lucky the teddy bear R/n got Baby combined some Music box melodies playing on the speakers was enough to calm the infant dragon down. Now Ken had different matter to attend to: Apologizing to R/n. it's been an hour or so and she still hasn't come back...

He did relax a little knowing they were on an island so she couldn't have gone far, she would've had to borrow one of his cars to leave (There was a Baby incident with R/n's car.)..."Mina did you give R/n a watch?" he asked in an anxious tone Mina confirmed that she had. "Bring her location up." Ken brows furrowed in concern as R/n location showed her off the shore in the ocean. "She probably walked onto a shoal path and got trapped on on a rock something when the tide came in." Mina theorized that didn't calm Ken's nerves as he told Mina to keep an eye on baby while he went to look for R/n he turned into Ultraman left for a swim out the airlock.

Meanwhile

R/n was cold, sore, wet and pissed off and worst off trapped on this rusty-ass buoy that she managed to grabbed onto as the current pulled her away from the shore, R/n scratched her arms and legs up from climbing onto to it as the ocean came more restless with each passing minute, and all she could do was sit there and berate herself. "Because you let it get to you, You let the stress and Ken get to you and that's you how you drowned in the sea...." R/n eyes widened horror as the realization dawns on her "Holy crap, I'm going to drown in the sea" Her complexion turned ashen as she last out a small gasp. "..Just like Meimei's card reading said." R/n said thinking back to her last shift.

*R/n was sitting in the DN6 break room eating lunch while Meimei sat across from her giving her a Tarot card reading with Digimon cards??? R/n looks at cards then at the teen skeptically. "...And how exactly would I drown in tea?" she asked while taking a bite of her sandwich.*

R/n thought it over for moment then shrugged "Eh, close enough..." And this was All be cause she just wanted a few minutes to herself and to be far away from Ken as possible! But being stuck out here made R/n realize she couldn't really blame him for lashing like that. He was stressed out they both were, neither of them haven't had a moment of peace in what seemed like forever! Hell they've barely spoke to each other since R/n moved in...One of them was bound to snap from the pressure eventually!

R/n looked across the pitch dark bay at the distance of the Ultrabase and wondered if she should risk it and try to swim back? The delivery girl looked down at her scrapped hand and legs then snorted. She'd never make it, R/n was by no means a profession swimmer and even if she was there was a risk of riptides; that with all the blood she was leaking she'd be inviting every predator in a near mile to a free dinner! 

While was stressing over her current predicament she failed to noticed the two blue lights under the waters surface searching around until they looked up, they seem brightened up when they noticed her sitting at the water's edge, R/n let out a panicked yelp as tried to hang on to the buoy for dear life as the waves caused by the unknown entity crashed against it threatening to send R/n tumbling out to sea! *Oh, Great...now I'm gonna get eaten by a kaiju!* The delivery girl thought as the unknown creature broke the waters surface but what greeted R/n wasn't some aquatic monster wanting to eat her but instead the towering figure of Ultraman standing over her.

"R/n." He said with a relieved sigh as he leaned down to get better look at her. "Are you okay?" The delivery girl hugged the buoy tight as his movements caused the water to shift around. "I'd be happier if I was on land!" the delivery girl whined as the buoy shifted violently Ken reached out and held the buoy still while he held out his free hand out for R/n to climb on to. The tiny woman reluctantly hopped on and expected Ken to just walk them back to the base but instead he suddenly cupped his other hand over her. "Hey, take a deep breath for me, ok?" R/n looked up confused at what Ken was doing. "Hold my breath? what for-" her voiced echoed of into the distance as Ultraman suddenly flew off into the sky.

R/n felt like her stomach was yanked into her feet as Ultraman flew them somewhere when he finally stopped and set her down R/n needed a minute to get her bearings before looking around her eyes widened in awe as she took in the white sandy beach and untamed jungle in the distance. "Where is this?" she asked looking up at the silver giant who rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. "It's just a random island my dad used for training, it's small enough not show up on any maps and completely uninhabited." he explained as the [y/hc] woman looked out into surroundings she could see some parts of the the island were all kinds of torn up and in the pale moonlight she could see areas of the beach were glassed over like it had been hit by a lighting strike or say an alien energy beam...

"Why did you bring me here-....Are you going kill me?!" Ultraman looked at her startled "What the hell makes you think that?!" R/n goes on a rant on how she knows and seen too much, she could go to the press! Which she wouldn't actually... but still she's a liability to his life! "Would you calm down? I'm not gonna kill you...I brought you here to talk." Ken reassured as he sat down, it was kinda funny seeing Ultraman sitting so casually in that sand as R/n reluctantly joined him...

the two of them relaxed to the sound of the waves crashing on the beach and crickets chirping in distant the jungle as Ken finally spoke up. "I'm sorry freaked out at you like that, It's just this whole thing with the baby and my jobs-" His timer started blinking R/n put her hand on his thigh. "Hey, It's okay. I get it..." Ken didn't seemed too convinced.

"No, what you said earlier; about uprooting your life... I never thanked you once for that did I?" The giant asked looking down the human his eyes dimmed somberly as R/n removed her hand from his thigh and looked down at her lap. "It wouldn't hurt to hear it every now and then...." The giant moved his hand so it was rested behind R/n who leaned back against it. "Well thanks, for everything." he said as the two sat in silence for a few moments enjoying the silence before R/n spoke up.

"I'm curious why haven't you switched back to human, don't you have 3 minutes or something?" Ultraman looked down at her oddly. "Uh...What? I don't have time limit, why would you think that?" he asked with sight laugh R/n's mouth opened but closed again when she couldn't come up with an answer. "I'm not sure...maybe I read it somewhere?" Ken was curious now and went to press where she had read that from? but was interrupted by Mina calling informing that the baby was waking up soon and she won't be happy seeing both her parents gone.

 "Welp, looks like break time over, let's go home" He held his hand out for R/n to hop onto this time delivery girl was ready for take off as Ultraman jumped up into the sky, when they got back to base Mina chewed Ken out for not bringing straight home to have her scrapes treated before the deciding to run away for an hour.

========================

{Ultraman didn't turn back into Ken cos he knew they weren't going to be staying on the island long.]

{Also: Did you catch the Archer reference?}

=========================

@mf-rockstar,@pattycakes2024,

@the-unhinged-raccoon,@karebears-klub,

@oh-kurva, @mashiromochi,

@boogiemansbitch, @ok-boke

@dap11

[keij0h]

⌗ BAD IDEA, RIGHT? ┆ the8

After finding out about your cheating boyfriend, your pettiness leads you to ask another one of your exes for a favor. The ex in question: Minghao.

caution : profanities. college au. ex!minghao. a bit suggestive. cheating. (Minghao’s not involved with the cheating.)

( divider by @/cafekitsune ! )

tap to listen !

No way. No fucking way.

Phone in hand, you stared intently at the pile of screenshots you just opened, trying your hardest to not pop a vessel and break every single thing near you as you stormed down the dorm halls.

It was a known rule to not leave your dorms once 10 pm strikes, yet that wasn’t refraining you from banging on a certain door, evidence right in your hand that apparently, your boyfriend has been sleeping around, and was stupid enough to post pictures of him doing it. So you figured that was worth being caught and suspended for, if it meant you could strangle him.

“it’s not as bad as you think, if you could just—“

“I don’t wanna fucking hear it.” you snarled, pushing past him as you stormed inside his dorm, barging his closet open, gathering a few of your clothes that you left in his dorm.

“Should’ve left you when that goddamn counselor told me to.” you muttered, shoving the pieces of clothing into a pile, simultaneously knocking a few of his things as you could hear his retorts from behind.

It wasn’t all the time that you felt rage like this. It just so happens that you managed to get so unlucky that your fate lands on a total douche, and you just refuse to muster up the fact that you endured a whole year with someone like him.

So when you finally slam his door closed, you’ve solemnly swear to not look back. But of course, you also weren’t leaving without a proper comeback.

And what better way to do that than to ask another person you’ve dated for assistance.

You had no idea what came to you that night, but you just found yourself back in the men’s dormitory, face to face with the “easiest” person you can reach out of everyone you’ve ever dated. Xu Minghao. At least, that’s what you thought.

“So, what do you say?” you hummed, still catching your breath with the amount of explaining you just said.

But even after all that, you were still met with that all too familiar, bitter: “No.”

The remaining hope you had on your face suddenly faltered, now replaced with a stoic glare. “I thought you said you’d be there for me even if we’re through? Huh? What happened to that?”

Minghao huffed, letting his shoulders slightly slump down as you recalled the same exact words he said two years ago when you broke up.

It was rather a weird way to remember, especially now that you’ve presented him your plan. The plan being simple: the same thing your (now ex) boyfriend did, make out, take pictures of it happening, and spread it around campus, then boom. Done.

“This is quite far from what I meant.” he pointed out, never breaking eye contact with your dejected state.

You could only click your tongue at this, not having a clue that this would be harder than you pictured it to be. “How the hell am I supposed to know what you meant? It’s not like you specified anything..”

For the record, he never did mentioned anything against something like this when he made the vow. But shit, it wasn’t like Minghao expected you to remember his words so easily, let alone recite it right in his face.

“Don’t even start acting like you don’t want this—“

“I really don’t.” he interferes, watching as the frown on your lips suddenly turns upwards as you tilt your head to the side.

“Oh, really?” you spurred, folding your arms to your chest. “Well, rumor has it..” you trail off, lowering your voice as you slightly lean towards him, enough to hear you mumble. “..you haven’t moved on from me.”

Truth be told, you weren’t so certain that it is a rumor, as you’ve only heard it from one of Minghao’s friends: who all still tend to tease him about you despite already calling it quits. Though he never seemed to have much of a response to it, which sucked to you.

He scoffs, rubbing a hand on his temple. “Did Jun tell you that?”

“Would it bother you if I said yes?”

“Then he’s full of shit.” he nods, smirking as he sees your expression shift back to a frown.

“Look, if you came here to just pester me and use my own words against me, then you’re free to go.” he shifts, pushing the door to close it on you, but failed as you slipped a foot right in the crack of it.

“Hate to say it, but this would’ve been so much easier if you would just agree.” you coo sarcastically, clasping both of your hands together. “You wouldn't even realize this ever happened, I swear.”

Minghao looks at you as you said that, this time, actually considering. It’s not like you want to make out with him, it’s just a petty little move to get back on your ex. Right? Whatever it was, it suddenly made him shiver.

With one final sigh, he spoke. “Three minutes. And that’s it. Clear?”

“Crystal.” you furiously nodded, letting yourself in before he could even do that himself.

Oh, boy.

“What are you even..” you sigh out loud. Not even a minute in, you were already having complications on making it seem.. real.

You were now situated on his lap, while he sat up with his back on the headboard. You tried your best to ignore the awkward tension, knowingly convinced yourself that it’ll all be worth it. It just had to be

As for Hao.. he just didn’t know where to put his hands.

“Can’t you make it more natural?” you scolded, grabbing a hold of both of his arms.

“Don’t expect me to be good at this, it’s been a while since I’ve touched you like this for fucks sake..” he argued, mumbling the last part as he looked down to his arms. All the while, your stomach churned at what he said, blinking away to stop yourself from thinking further.

“Just- just do it the way you normally did..” you sigh, now feeling his arms wrap around your figure, simultaneously feeling the tips of your ears heat up.

“This alright?” he muttered huskily, looking up at you. You heaved a breath, briefly staring right into him before nodding. “Mhm. It’s fine.”

The way his dorm room smelt, how warm he felt, it was all familiar, and you’d be caught dead if you said it didn’t calm you down. You struggled to reach for your phone beside you as you attempted to angle it down to a natural level. It was mostly focused on Minghao, while your face was a bit hidden, but enough to recognize who it was.

You cleared your throat, signaling that you should, well, start. You took a moment to observe him more, eyes gazing from his cheeks to his lips, until he pulled you out of your trance.

“Hey,” he called out. “Time’s ticking.”

Shit, right.

Your free hand found its way to the back of his neck, finally pressing your lips against his. You felt that certain shockwave as soon as you felt him kissing back, hand trailing through your cheek as you blindly snapped the pictures in your shaking hands.

“Hao, wait–”

You gasped into his mouth, Minghao purposely swatting your phone away, letting it fall somewhere on the bed.

You could feel your throat beating as he pulled you further to deepen the kiss, his plump lips moving so rhythmically with yours. You’ve missed this, more than you’ll ever admit. He’s always been such a skilled kisser, and you never understood that. All you knew was it felt too good, the sensation alone enough to drive you crazy.

A shiver ran up your spine as you felt his hand slip under your cotton shirt, gently caressing the soft skin of your back, accidentally letting out a hitched moan through the kiss, lighting a surge of pride on Minghao as his lips twitched into a smirk.

The three minutes you both agreed on was already over, yet he kept his grip firm, refusing to let go just yet.

Just as his hands reached the hem of your shirt, the loud tone of your phone going off filled your senses, making you abruptly pull away from Minghao, breathless as you got off his lap, hastily fumbling through his sheets in search of your phone.

A hint of panic suddenly washed over you, the contact name of your roommate right on the screen. You looked over your shoulder, catching a glance of Minghao’s slight weary state, not missing the subtle kiss marks you left all over his face as his lips parted, his eyes motioning you to go ahead.

Shaken a bit, you swiped the answer button, placing it right in your ear.

“Hey–”

“Where are you?? You never told me you were going out..” the alarmed tone on your roommate’s voice loomed over you, making you silently hiss.

“I, uh, I fell asleep..” you looked at the Minghao as you said that, causing another smirk from him, mocking your stupid excuse as you glared at him before turning away. “..in the library.”

“Oh, do you need me to get you there, or–

“No!” you exclaimed, sheepishly clearing your throat as you realized how forward it sounded. “Sorry, it's just that.. I'm already on my way back.”

Liar. Minghao thought, softly shaking his head in disbelief, biting back an amused smile.

A breath of relief left your lips as you ended the call, shoving your phone back in the pockets of your sweatpants.

“That wasn't three minutes, by the way.” you remarked plainly, standing up to pat down on your shirt, getting ready to leave.

“You didn't pull away either.” Minghao added in a matter-of-fact tone. All the while you rolled your eyes at him. God, him and his sly remarks, you kinda hoped that he got rid of that trait by now.

“Hey,” he suddenly called out before you could reach the door, cautiously making you look back. “Yeah?”

You watched as he faltered, somehow hesitant to just say it as you waited. With a sigh, he spoke up.

“Would it bother you if I said that Jun was telling the truth?” A slight reference to what you said earlier. The scary part was that he seemed a bit too serious, but anyway, you saw it coming from miles away.

You snorted, shaking your head simultaneously. “I never believed you anyway.”

Honestly, Minghao agrees that your presence can be infuriating at times. Though he can never say that he didn't miss it, and was willing to see more of it. That is, if you'd let him.

Considering that all of this was for some idiotic, and needless to say, petty comeback, you couldn't lie, you'd do it again.

“Goodnight, Hao. I'll see you.”

He chuckles. “Oh, you will.”

a/n : this took so long for what smh. also I'm obsessed with the Guts album rn, so hereee! And ofc reblogs/likes are much appreciated!!!!

[the-monkeies-girl]

Jealous Noa does something to me. 😚

hi uh thanks satan now i cant stop thinking about it let's get FERAL

NSFW CONTENT BELOW ( 18+ ) PLEASE READ AT YOUR OWN RISK THANK YOUUUU.

Imagine Noa like... Denying you seeing your friend ( another male ape in the clan who you've gotten close with ). Noa brings it up of course, a bit bitter at the way you smelled that particular afternoon, maybe some added stressors like the Elders being on his ass about something.

Like, you have accidentally brought this Apes SCENT into the nest? How DARE? It's on your clothing, it's in your HAIR, soaked into your SKIN? That's how close in proximity you've been, you're defending yourself, Noa knows that and there's rational thought in there somewhere but he doesn't like it. "You're not allowed to see him again."

"You can't stop me from seeing my friends, Noa!"

"Do you... want to bet?" A phrase you had taught him comes back as he rounds near you, the intentions in his eyes flurrying to you as you swallowed and nodded. Yeah, you wanted to bet. You wanted to find out. "What are you gonna do to me, Eagle Boy?" Your voice is nothing more than a tease to him.

And well

Your clothes are nothing but a tangled mess on the ground, torn to PIECES because Noa doesn't feel like sparing them a second chance, the absolute carnage of his canines against your neck, him swiping your body so you're pressed against him, your back flushed to his chest and he starts trailing his bites along the back of your neck and RIGHT BETWEEN YOUR SHOULDER BLADES.

Right in the most tender spot that he can find and he's holding you against him as you're moaning, squirming and telling him that you're sorry, that you won't hang out with him again and he just. Let's you rub against him like that, letting your scent rub against him of course, but in return, you're getting absolutely blasted with his own and something deep inside of him knows that it's going to take a lot of washing for it to fade.

Plops you right on the nest, face down he doesn't know how to handle his emotions looking at your face, thinking that this other Ape had more intentions with you than you were really willing to realize.

No foreplay this time, he's mounting you. You're his and you know you are as your body is reacting to him, urging him to take you as you moaned his name.

No pleasure outside of the brief moment he shatters into you and your hands are hard to grasp the animal pelt below you, lungs rattling at the pure force and drive of his hips snapping into yours.

I have a feeling he'd be spiteful enough to make you wait to orgasm though, quick for himself to fill you to the brim, marking you even further as you squiggle against him and he can feel you tightening around him as he continues at a slower pace, content in his actions as he light licks the blood from your shoulder blades, lapping his tongue around and giving artistic swirls of red against your skin.

You're begging him, literally, to let you cum. To touch you, to do anything, legs shaking and forearms tense as you were struggling to keep yourself up. You think he's done? No, no. He is on his butt, grasping your legs and tearing you right against him, back once again flushed to his chest as he helps you right him, your legs being almost suspended in air as Noa uses the strength he had to practically man-handle you on his cock. Hard, he's relentless and mean almost, feeling the tug of bruising along the softer nature of your inner thighs but you don't want it to stop. He brushes his tongue along the side of your neck, cementing even more of himself on you as you toss your head back against his shoulder as you finally orgasm against him.

Afterwards is really nice and tender tho like. Noa making sure that he didn't hurt you, making sure that you were okay as he racks his hand through your hair ( Hey another sprinkling of his scent all over you, how sweet <3 ). You're face down in the nest and just laugh as he looks at the pretty nasty bite mark between your shoulder blades with a bit of guilt, thinking that he had actually hurt you. But, you turn your face and laugh softly at him and mutter, "So it took hang out with another Ape to get you to come out like that? I need to hang out with them more."

[slowlysoluminary]

Reset AU ... mirror room art piece and a supplemental from ghostloop's pov 🎉

Writing under the cut! (Lots of words... oops!!!!!!!)

(Venturing through the house has been nothing short of a terror.)

(The sadnesses littering the area are NOT helping!)

(Granted, you know how to fight - you have each sadness' type memorized, each name and gimmick on lock - but your craft...)

(You're not sure what Craft type you are. You're corporeal enough for your hits to connect, but not corporeal enough for attacks to land on you. Harder still, considering the craft types are all equally as easy for you to summon.)

(Maybe "easy for you to summon" is poor phrasing. Your attacks feel wrong. Unfamiliar.)

(Your Piercing Craft likes to trail, not unlike the rest of your body. You struggle the least with Scissors-type attacks, but it feels like something fundamental is missing in each of your strikes.)

(Your Creative Craft leaves after-images. You thought you were Paper craft for a good while, but you're clumsy with it - like it wasn't made with your body in mind.)

(Your Protector's Craft sparks like energy through your fist. Something pangs at your chest each time you form the handshape.)

(Your attacks are strange. Craft personalizes itself to its user, but for such attuned craft to be so alien....)

(Thinking about it gives you a weird headache.)

(So you won't!!)

(You watch Siffrin fight. He made you sit out of battle after that time you downed yourself. Impeccable aim, Loop!!)

(... They never win, but you figure you should respect their wishes regardless.)

(You feel Experienced. Like these sadnesses would wither away if you poked them too hard. They probably would, if you could land a hit in the first place!)

(You can't help but compare the way he fights with the way you fight. Or, the way you think you should.)

(Like his name, like the House, like everything else, it's all familiar. You fight the same way as him, but your craft makes it difficult to do so comfortably.)

(You can't help but be envious. Why are you envious?)

(The style isn't even yours! You're pretty sure it's adapted from his, even!!)

(Nothing is your own. Not even your body is safe!!! Your skin prickles when you look down. Stars dance across your form naturally, yet it feels unnatural all the same.)

(Stars, are you going crazy? You think you're going crazy!)

(Siffrin shifts next to you, walking comfortably in your silence. You lead the way to the next door.)

("Why Stardust?" They asked you that, before. At least, you think they did? What did you respond with? Something about what's left...?)

(... You don't know. Just, seeing him, talking to him - he's Stardust! So, you must be Loop.)

(It found you so easily in your sea of muddled memories. It must be what the Universe willed!)

(But you still don't know. But you still can't remember. What's wrong with you?)

"Finally, third floor..."

(Siffrin turns a key. You're climbing the House. Right.)

(You smile. Is it forced? You're not sure. The gesture reminds you of something.)

>"Awh, good job, Stardust! It only took you... ehm...."

>"20 Loops! That's great! A bit worse than me, but who's keeping track, right?"

"'A bit worse than you?' Did you remember something?"

("A bit worse than you?")

>"What? I didn't say anything."

(You didn't. Did you?)

(Siffrin makes a noise. They're looking at you funny.)

"Nevermind."

(O~kay. Weird.)

...

(The King sobs.)

(They talk to you about him. A lot more than you want them to, if you're being honest.)

(Hearing his name, his likeness, to be spoken of so fondly - you feel rage. A deep and primal anger you're sure you've never felt before and will never feel again.)

(So, yes! Hearing the King sob the whole time like he's not actively dooming an entire blinding country has done wonders on your psyche! The reminder of his existence fills you with such joy and whimsy!)

(Your smile is pulled so taut you think it would tear at your skin, if you had any.)

(Siffrin's expression is plagued with sympathy. Something in your core stirs violently at the thought.)

>"Chin up, soldier~! One more floor to climb!"

(The sympathetic look fades, but you don't feel any better. You don't think about the implications.)

"... Right. One more floor."

>"I hope all this effort was worth it!"

"Ditto. Even if I can't snap some sense into him, I just..."

"I want to talk. I've told you about it before, but-"

(stop don't talk about him no no no no)

>"STARdust! Surely there's no need to go over everything again!"

>"You might be forgetful, but helpful Loop here already knows the ins and outs of your fool-proof plan~!!"

>"You've told me about it, you continue to tell me about it, you don't stop telling me about it — I GET IT ALREADY!"

>"Just. We'll. We'll get to it when we get to it, right? Please."

(you're not sure why)

(but the thought of talking to the king fills your entire being with sickness)

(Too bad you can't throw up! Teehee!!)

(Siffrin looks pained.)

"Right, I'll just -- I'm."

"I'm sorry..."

(Oh.)

(His voice is so tender. So quiet.)

(You ruined it.)

(That's fine. You don't -- you don't need the ability anyway. You can make your way through the house on your own. You don't need them to get stronger. It's fine.)

(...)

(What were you thinking about? It doesn't matter.)

>"So~! That out of the way."

(This time you ignore the King wailing above you.)

>"Where do we go?"

(His face is hidden from you, beneath the brim of his hat. You have a fun time thinking about the expression under it!)

(Is it twisted in frustration? Appalled? Mortified? Betrayed?)

(You know those faces like the back of your hand, but the specifics amalgam in your head, a foggy mass of uncertainty.)

(You feel a tingle on your cheek.)

(... Yes, fun! What fun!)

(Siffrin clears their throat.)

"... You've been leading me through most of the House, Loop."

"So I thought you would know where to go?"

(You have?)

>"I have?"

"Yes?????"

(What????)

>"No I haven't."

"Yes? You have??"

(He looks offended???)

"The rock trap? The key I missed in the Head Housemaiden's office?"

>"'Fraid you're not ringing any bells!!"

(Conversations are one of the only things you remember. Everything else blends together.)

(So, you should know this, shouldn't you? They must've brought it up a few times while you were walking. You weren't thinking too hard about where you were going. The paths feel wholly natural to you... But you do remember that the amount of times you had to give Siffrin a Super Sour Tonic was atrocious, really.)

(How does anyone lose to sadnesses THAT often? It's ridiculous! He should just let you fight!!!)

"Loop?"

(Whoops!!! You should pay more attention to your surroundings...)

(...)

(No, okay, wait.)

>"When did we get to the mirror room?"

(The glare Siffrin gives you bears the striking image of absolute incredulocity.)

(That's not a word. Whatever!!! You can make up new words if you so please!!)

"You're kidding."

>"Completely serious question, Stardust!"

"...'Stardust, I am the epitome of good memory...'"

(HE'S MOCKING YOU!!)

>"I am! I swear it on my mother!"

"Stars have mothers?"

(You shrug before remembering to raise a gloved hand to your mouth.)

>"I don't know!"

>"But I'm sure, if I had one, she'd be especially bright."

(An eyeroll.)

(They don't laugh.)

(Why does that bother you?)

(Eh, probably because that one was funny! No fair!)

>"You're no fun, Stardust..."

"Okay."

>"Whatever! I'll find a pun buddy somewhere else!!"

"And where would you go? Vaugarde's frozen in time."

("And you're practically a ghost," is what goes unsaid.)

(...mmm. No, it's fine.)

>"I'll write to them! We'll be pen pals!"

>"Or I guess we'd be pun pals, ehe."

(They snort. Mission success!!!)

"Not funny."

>"Oh, come on! You laughed!! That means I won the bet!"

"The bet was about laughing at your jokes. Puns don't count."

(Bummer! You pout.)

"Real talk. Any particular reason for bringing us here? I trust you, but..."

"... The only thing in here is that mirror."

(They point to the large mirror at the end of the corridor. You nod. There is a mirror, and nothing else.)

>"Indeed so."

"And you called it the mirror room?"

(Did you?)

>"No I didn't."

"I'm not arguing with you again..."

(Aren't they doing that already?)

"Just answer the question."

>"I wasn't aware I was being interrogated! I need a lawyer!!!"

"Loop."

>"Fine! I-... Um."

>"I."

>"I'm not ... quite sure?"

"You're not sure."

>"Nope!"

(They sigh.)

"So you led us here... for no particular reason?"

>"Exactly!"

>"Well. No, I'm sure there's some reason we're here."

>"I feel like there's something else in this room, you know?"

>"But! As far as I'm aware!! There is nothing in here!!! Save for that dazzling old mirror!!!!"

"Right."

(He doesn't believe you.)

"... Let's look around, then?"

>"Sounds good to me."

(You look around.)

(Okay, you don't actually do anything. Siffrin's going at it, though!)

(He checks the pillars. And the corners. And the bricks. And the pillars again.)

(It's... really boring.)

(It's better than the Other Thing you could be doing. The Elephant In The Room. The Big Mirror In The Corridor-Room. That.)

(Hm. Hmmmmmmm.)

(You weigh your options.)

(Boredom. Or headache. Boriiing borreeedooom...... or excruciating headache.)

(Or answers? You don't know the mirror's deal! You could get something meaningful out of this!)

(Or you could get a headache.)

(Or you could lean against a pillar, bored, for the rest of eternity, waiting to be Done and Over With This.)

(...)

(You've been pointedly ignoring the existence of the mirror for quite the while now.)

(Something goads you. A whisper.)

(You follow. Siffrin watches you, curious.)

(You don't... You don't really want to look.)

(Just looking down spikes something uncomfortable under your skin.)

(So you're not sure what to expect, if you were to look in your reflection.)

(Whispers turn to spoken tongue turn to yelling turn to screaming as you approach the glass. Yet, no matter how loud they get, how heartfelt they screech, you can't make out the words.)

(Something in you hurts as you stand in front of the glass.)

(You take a breath)

(in, and out.)

(And you look up.)

(and all at once)

(everything goes quiet)

(...)

(You gaze at your reflection)

(You gaze at a star.)

(is this you?)

(you wave your hand)

(it waves back.)

(You frown. It frowns too.)

(Stars. All up its body.)

(More than you could dream of, could you still dream in the first place.)

(Flame-like spikes flicker freely from its head, immitating hair.)

(Imitating life.)

(You're looking at a ghost.)

(you're a ghost?)

(The screaming returns. You flinch back in surprise. The ghost does not flinch with you.)

(LOOP, it screams. LOOP, LOOP, LOOP, LOOP !!!)

(Its head morphs. It's something spikier, now. It's something right.)

(your head hurts)

(The ghost snickers at you. You look at it.)

(You look at it)

(it's)

(it's)

(loop)

(you look at loop)

(LOOP, the screaming chants, in agreement. LOOP!)

(someone is shaking you?)

(this is loop)

(but you're loop?)

(are you loop?)

(The screaming rises. You didn't think it could get any louder. You cover your ears and cower. It doesn't do anything)

(loop laughs at you.)

(you forgot)

(of course you forgot! you always forget! forgetful little siffrin! sieve brain siffrin)

(you stole their role. in the play)

(you stole them)

(you)

"LOOP!"

(You blink)

(You is in front of you. Your back is leaning against cool glass.)

(if your back is to the mirror)

(how are you looking in your reflection?)

(The you in front of you sighs.)

"You were out cold there... What happened, Loop?"

(you wait for them to respond)

("Nothing, Stardust!! You should go help out your little entourage! Or, you know, you could do something more productive? Like talk to the Head Housemaiden?")

(that's what you think they would say)

(you feel a shiver)

"... I'm not... part of a party...? Oh, no, nevermind. I get it."

(your reflection releases you. you slump to the ground.

(you pull your hands up to your head)

(and stop)

(your arms)

(your arms..)

"Loop."

>"... Loop?"

(Oh!)

>"Yes! I am Loop."

(Siffrin gives you That Look again.)

"What was all that?"

(All that?)

>"I'm not sure what you're talking about!"

"It was like you... um..."

"Forgot your name. Or something."

(Forgot your name? Scandalous!! You'd never forget such a thing!)

>"Nope, all good!"

>"I just... hm. Thought you were talking to someone else there, for a second?"

>"But I'm fine now!"

"If you say so."

(He doesn't take your word for this, either.)

(Oh well!)

(You bend down and flip the switch, extra careful not to look at the mirror. Or the photo that materializes in front of it.)

"How did you-?"

(They try to ask, but you're already moving for the key.)

(Loop.)

(That's you!)

(So why does that name remind you of someone else?)

[kangaracha]

QUEENMAKER | CHAPTER 22

---

pairing chan x reader

genre ninth member au, angst, fluff, coming of age, social media, cancel culture, anxiety, depression, forbidden love,

summary To JYPE, the solution is simple; take the sole trainee that will not debut with your brand new girl group, and use her to replace the missing vocalist in your male group that insisted on starting as nine.

Unfortunately, to the fans and the members themselves, it isn't that simple.

status ongoing

taglist OPEN

a/n this thing is a MONSTER and it's all for you. feast. eat pray love. leave me a nice comment. love u all.

previous | masterlist | next

---

The moment you step off the stage, your breath still lost from the energy and flying notes of Hellevator, you are surrounded by bodies, squeezing you even tighter than the fear that you'd held in your chest when you'd first stepped up into the flashing lights.

They accost you right there in the dark underside of the stage, steps away from the eyes of the crowd that had only moments ago born down upon you. You feel lightheaded under their grasp, your knees buckling underneath you as the rush of the stage catches up to you; the struggle of your lungs to draw breath, the relief of having made it to the end, the feeling of having done it, stood there and looked at that crowd and realised the dream that had clutched at you since you were far younger and more naive. 

It bubbles up from inside you - first, a gasp of breath, searching for air in the suffocation of eight boys howling around you, and then, inexplicably, a laugh, light and hoarse and rasping at your throat as it struggles to the surface. "Okay, okay, wait," Chan says somewhere to your right, pushing Changbin away before he really can squeeze the life out of you and then the others, one by one. "She can't breathe. Let her - breathe-"

Slowly, the group breaks apart, filtering down the hall and back towards the waiting room. Felix is the one that drags you along first, an arm thrown around your neck before anyone else can and a giddy smile plastered across his face. You feel like you should be wearing one too, with the way your head spins and your chest aches with an emotion you can't quite describe, but you find yourself echoing the softer smile that Chan offers as he falls in step behind you, something unspeakable echoing in his eyes.

You can't make out a single word any of them say as you come into the room, standing there bereft in the centre of the whirlwind as they move around you, splaying out across the couches in the corner or removing a part of their outfit that is too uncomfortable to keep wearing. You're not sure what you want to do; the room buzzes with activity, not only from the members, but the staff as well, shifting back and forth as they push chairs together and set up a camera for the livestream that is to follow. The rings on your fingers twist endlessly as you consider your options, turning around and around with the memories of that stage and those songs, these boys in sync around you-

Your eyes fall on I.N, sitting dejectedly on one of the sofas arranged for the livestream with a look on his face that says he is very much not ready for the camera to be turned on at all. You know why without having to go over and ask. You'd seen it out of the corner of your eye during God's Menu, on your way to the front of the formation; his foot slipping out from underneath him as he crouched and the ungraceful sprawl that had followed. You hadn't had time to see what had happened next, if he'd been late standing back up or if he'd kicked anyone else on the way down, but whatever it was had clearly upset him, if he is hiding in a corner now.

He's not alone, at least; Chan is slumped next to him, one hand patting his knee absent-mindedly. The slaps become harder as you approach, trying to goad the younger boy into moving. You suppose it has the desired effect when his hand reaches out to slap Chan's away, his leg never moving.

"Y/N," Chan says as you approach, relief clear in his voice. "Come here. Tell him he hasn't ruined your whole career."

"Why would he have ruined my career?" you ask, sitting tentatively at the edge of the couch. 

"It was so obvious that I fell over," I.N answers dejectedly, his eyes fixed on the floor. "It was your first part in your first stage, and everyone would have just seen me messing it up."

A smile curves at your lips despite yourself, your hands itching to reach out and shake this nonsense from him. "I don't care if anyone was looking at me," you tell him. "Maybe you helped me out. And the other three songs were fine, weren't they?"

"Exactly," Chan agrees. "No one got hurt and everyone enjoyed the stage, that's all that matters."

"I just hate that I messed it up," I.N says, and his eyes turn to you. "You were so nervous, and we wanted it to be perfect, and-"

"Hey, I didn't see a thing." Your hands come up as if confessing, your head shaking. "As far as I knew, everything was perfect."

It's a small lie, omitting what you had clearly seen from the corner of your eye, but he doesn't need to know that, not when he looks at you with such lamb-soft eyes and asks, "Really?" and you are able to nod and pat him on the shoulder and then reach out and envelop him in a hug, the way you imagine you would for any little brother you might have been lucky enough to be blessed with (but these little brothers, you think, might just be the biggest blessing there is to gain, so much so that even now you don't feel worthy of it).

Above his head, your eyes lock with Chan's, sharing a look; there is gratitude in his eyes, and that open warmth that he extends to everyone he meets, and something else that you can't quite pinpoint, an unreadable emotion that flickers across his face and twists in the corner of his mouth, swallowed down before it can give itself a voice.

"What are you looking at?" Chan asks as the clock ticks past midnight, leaning back in his chair to try to peek at your phone screen.

You blink at him in surprise, unprepared for the sudden departure from the conversation you'd been having about whatever happened to come to mind. You'd thought neither of you were really paying attention to the words that were passing between you since Changbin had left the room several minutes ago; Chan's eyes were glued to his laptop and yours to your phone, casually scrolling as you waited for your mind to wind down enough to sleep.

You're reticent to show him what you're scrolling through though, because you know what he'll think, how he'll worry about it. They all do, on the odd occasion they catch you, and maybe they have a point - when you sit here and acknowledge the dissatisfaction that is slowly putting down roots in your chest now that the performance is over and done and you've had time to read what they think and compare it to your memory. You'd been happy with your efforts earlier in the day, but at this hour now, watching it back and seeing the cracks-

"Is that twitter?" he asks, and if he leans even further to be able to see, you don't call him out on it, just sigh and turn your phone so that he can see, accepting your fate. It's too late in the night for lying, and you probably need to hear something nice about yourself just once in this hour, if you're being truthful. 

His face furrows as he reads what's on your screen, his hands reaching out to take the phone from your hands. His frown only gets deeper the further he scrolls; it's a darker expression than you'd thought, something closer to fury than you'd thought he was capable of.

"I just wanted to see what they thought of the performance," you say, as if that's any excuse when you'd already had a feeling about what you'd find. 

"You could have just asked me if it was good," Chan replies. "Or Lee Know. We're not going to lie to you." You can still see that anger in his face when he looks up, but it isn't directed at you - instead, it softens when your eyes meet, replaced by the concern you knew was coming instead.

You shrug. "I wanted a wide range of opinions," you say, as if that makes the vitriol you've handed him any better.

"This isn't a wide range of opinions," he says. "This is-"

"What is it?" you ask when he pauses mid sentence, craning your neck to see what he's seeing. 

He clicks out of it before you can read anything, navigating smoothly back to the endless stream of tweets you'd been looking at before. "Nothing," he claims, and affixes a brightness to his face that tries its best to mask the disgust that struggles to surface. "I can't believe you don't trust us. What are we even here for?"

"I trust you," you say. "I just wanted to see what everyone else said."

"No you don't," he insists, his voice lifting higher and higher as if he's going to laugh. "You didn't even back me up when I told you Changbin's lyrics needed work."

You know the humour is only surface-deep when his eyes flick back to the phone screen, but it gets to you anyway, lifting at the corners of your mouth and easing the weight in your chest. He's hard to resist like that sometimes, even when you know exactly what he is doing and why he is doing it. "What does that have to do with anything?"

"You didn't think I was telling the truth then," he claims, "and you won't think I'm telling the truth now if I tell you the performance was amazing."

"You haven't even tried," you poke back, crossing your arms indignantly. "You just made up all these lies about me for yourself and said nothing."

"Oh, you want my compliments now?"

"No, I'm not that desperate."

"Lying again, it's such a bad look."

"What was that?" you ask as your phone beeps in his hand, a message popping up in the notification bar. Chan clicks it for you dutifully, pulling up your private thread with Changbin - a moment passes while you read, and then you cough out a laugh.

"Wasn't he going to sleep?" you ask, shaking your head at the message. 

"It has been a whole three hours since he last ate," Chan answers, and then pauses as he looks at the screen again, his eyes narrowing. "Why are all your contacts blank?"

"What?" you say, and then you see that he has bumped back to your message list; a long line of grey bubbles, broken up only by the colourful pictures that they have set for each other in the group chats. "I don't know."

"I wasn't reading your messages," he adds before you can answer, handing the phone back to you. "I just noticed you had nothing set for Changbin. He's like, the easiest one to get a photo of."

"I don't have any photos of any of you," you point out. "What am I supposed to do, google for photos of you?"

"Just take photos of us?" Chan suggests in answer, and then he sees what your fingers are already up to on your phone screen. "Hey, no, hold on - hey, don't do that-"

"One of these?" you ask and hold the phone up so that he can see, an impish smile on your face.

"No, no, no, no, no," he replies, his ears turning red. "No, put that away. Oh my god."

"What about this?"

"Give me that," he says, snatching at your phone. It takes him three tries to get it - you screech as he leans forward, trapping you between your chair and the table as he grabs at your wrist and then your fingers, the offending photo sliding away on the screen. His breath is hot on your neck when he laughs, his nails gentle where they bite into the skin of your thumb, prying the phone from your grip. 

You give it up without fighting; your fun has been had, after all, and his face is flushed red, the laugh that bubbles up from his chest more genuine than the light fun he had been poking earlier. You've even nearly forgotten about the tweets you'd been reading, the black mark they've left inside your chest covered up by your shirt and the silly giggle that spills out of your mouth, unable to be swallowed.

"Here," he says and lifts your phone, posing so subtly for the camera that you're not even sure he knows he's doing it. "Now you have one out of eight." It only takes him a few taps to set the photo, as if it really was as easy as ten seconds of work that you'd been neglecting, and then turns the phone to show you.

"Do you want me to send you photos of the others, or are you going to do it yourself?" he asks.

"No, I'm going to ask Minho for all of his weird photos," you answer. 

He laughs despite himself, the giggle high and breathy. "The ones in the group chat aren't enough for you?"

"No," you say. "No, I'm starting to think I need blackmail material."

Chan lets his face fall in slow motion, from humour to despair. "I used to think you were on my side," he laments to the room at large, as dramatic as any actor you've seen, "but you have the worst friends."

"That you introduced me to."

The grin that spreads slowly across his face and the wicked glint that flashes in his eye send apprehension shivering down your spine. "Actually," he says, "Felix introduced you. And you called him sunbaenim."

You freeze, deer in the headlights as your cheeks turn red, and he bursts out laughing, unable to help himself anymore. "Okay," you say, defeated, and sink back into your chair as if it might swallow you, pointing at his computer. "Please go back to your music stuff before I leave."

"Okay then," he says, leaning forward, and then looks at you again. "Hubaenim."

You bury your head in your hands and groan.

TAGLIST

@kokinu09 @rainfallingfromthesky @lixie-phoria @mysweethannie @chlodavids

@hanniemylovelyquokka @tfshouldidohere @lauraliisa @puppysmileseungmin @kalopsian-thoughts

@puppy-minnie @readerofallthingss @dvbkie099 @kthstrawberryshortcake-main @acker-night

@d-chagi @lynlyndoll @borahae-reads @ihrtlix @yienmarkk

@minhwa @i2innie @jinnie-ret @conwunder @amesification

@starssongs98 @weirdhumanbeinglol @morinuu @the-weird-mold-in-the-sink @bokkiesplace

@amyyscorner @jiisungllvr @skzstaykatsy @blackhairandbangs @jungkookies1002

@hyuuukais @imsiriuslyreal @thatonedemigodfromseoul @gini143 @mercurywritesstuff

@splat00z @filmbypsh @palindrome969 @crabrangoongirl25 @enzos-shit

@jabmastersupriseee @kayleefriedchicken @hynjinswrld @duhgurl @cheshireshiya

@keepswingin

[jungkit]

HEARTS ON FIRE - YANG JUNGWON

SYNOPSIS: you lived your life buried in your parent’s routine for you. a perfect princess with a perfect life…or so one would think. now you’re being married off to the prince of valdenia for a trade operation. problem is, he already has a girlfriend, and he is not happy.

pairing: prince!jungwon x princess!reader

genre: royalty au, arranged marriage, enemies2lovers, non-idol au

word count: 8.1k

You don’t know what you did to deserve this. Here you are, a young woman with ambitions and dreams, being married off to some low-life prince. 

Being a princess is not easy, fuck everyone who says it is.

  From age 5, you have been taught, more like forced, to be a good princess. 

Following every rule, never stepping a toe out of line. 

You learned how to walk, how to talk, how to eat, how to be.

You were heavily reprimanded and punished if you ever appeared in a way your parents didn’t like. 

You can only be yourself when you’re alone, in your room. 

You are not allowed to indulge in your interests in front of your parents, who will shut you down immediately. 

  Your most immense love is art. You remember being ten years old and admiring the paintings your family kept in the palace. You pointed out every stroke, every color, every detail your eyes could find. When you told your parents you wanted to paint, they scolded you. They said art was a waste of time and that you had better things to do.

The following week, your parents had a professional painter come to do a family portrait. 

You got scolded for not holding still because you wanted to watch the painter. 

  The only good part of your life was Estelle. She was the head maid, and you loved her. 

She treated you as her own and let you indulge in every interest you had in secret. 

One day, Estelle showed up in your room with paint and a canvas.

You were so thrilled you almost screamed. 

You spent the rest of that day painting. Of course, you weren’t good, but that was okay. 

As time passed, you garnered a collection of paintings you had done, inspired by the ones you saw in the castle. Eventually, you got good! As much as you wanted to show your parents, you knew they would disapprove. And you didn’t want Estelle to get in trouble either. 

  Here you are over ten years later, still hiding your paintings in your room. You’re not worried about your parents finding them because they never enter your room. 

It’s almost time for dinner, and your parents said they had important news to share. 

As you make your way down, a pit forms in your stomach. Something suddenly doesn’t feel right. You do your best to ignore it, entering the dining hall. 

Your parents barely acknowledge your presence. 

“Before we start dinner, you must know something, Y/N,” your father says.

“Does this have to do with the news you told me about?”

“Yes, you’re getting married.” Your mother responds. 

  What? Did they say married?

“What are you talking about?” You ask, and that pit inside your stomach grows.

“You’re getting married to the prince of Valdenia. This is an opportunity to do business with them, and they only offered if we gave them your hand in marriage.”

  “Are you kidding? I'm being sold off for a business deal?”

Your father stands abruptly, slamming his hands on the table. “Don't speak to us that way! You have no choice in the matter!” 

  “This is my life we’re talking about. Who are you to give it away!” You can feel your eyes prick with tears.

You knew your parents didn't care for you the way they should've, but this was too far.

“We’re doing what's best for the kingdom!” Your mother argues.

“So, giving me away is what's best for the kingdom. I knew you didn't love me, but this is sickening!”

  With that, you rush out of the dining area.

You can feel the tears rushing down your cheeks.

Slamming your door shut, you climb onto your bed, still sobbing. 

  After five minutes, you hear your door slowly open. 

You figure it's your parents, and you're ready to tell them to get out until you hear a soft voice call your name.

You look up and make out Estelle’s figure through blurry eyes.

You spring up off your bed, running into her awaiting arms.

“Estelle, they're marrying me off,” you sob, burying your face into her dress.

“I heard, sweetheart. I hate to be the one to say this, but this could end up being a good thing.”

  You sniffle, looking up at her, “What do you mean?”

“I mean, maybe you’ll find love. A love who will cherish you and let you be yourself. Look at this situation with an open mind. You never know what’s in store for you.”

  You stop crying, taking Estelle’s words in.

Could this be a benefit to you?

Could your life take a different turn?

You go to bed that night, a million thoughts racing in your mind. 

The following day, you don't speak to your parents as they tell you that you’ll all be meeting with the king and queen of Valdenia, along with their son.

Of course, they're acting like nothing happened. That's what they always do.

You're in one of your best gowns, a beautiful blush pink ensemble.

Unfortunately, Valdenia is a long 3-hour carriage ride from your kingdom.

The only thing you have to cure your boredom is a book.

  As you read, no one speaks. You're surprised your parents aren't whispering to each other as they usually do.

Time passes slowly. When you finally look up from your book, it’s mid-day. 

Looking outside the carriage for the first time, the once dull gray that was painted in the sky turned brilliant blue. 

  The kingdom of Valdenia comes into view. As your carriage rolls through, you see people all along the streets. Kids, vendors.

Every person you see has a smile on their face.

Compared to the people of your kingdom, this looks like paradise.

  Outside the palace doors, the king and queen stand alongside their son. 

Your parents step out first, and you follow.

Coming face to face with their son, he looks away from you, not meeting your eyes.

You scoff, looking down at your heel-clad feet.

  You're broken out of your trance by the queen's loud voice. 

The queen cups your face, squishing your cheeks together.

“Look how beautiful you are! Isn't she perfect, dear?”

She turns to her husband, who smiles, gracing his features.

  They both usher you and your parents inside. 

The prince follows you grudgingly.

As you enter the palace, you are welcomed into their charming dining room, where tea and finger foods have been prepared for your enjoyment. 

  You end up sitting across from the prince as your parents make small talk.

  You can feel him glaring at you. 

It’s so obvious, yet everyone seems to be ignoring it. 

You look up, finally meeting his eyes.

He doesn’t look away or soften up. He continues to glare. 

You haven’t even introduced yourself, and he’s already looking at you with hatred. 

You won’t stand for that, so you quickly slip him your middle finger.

His expression finally changes from anger to surprise before he’s frowning. 

  Jungwon’s never hated someone so much.

You’ve done nothing to him, but your existence already hinders his life. 

And here you are, flipping him off.

How rude!

  Yes, he was glaring at you, but even so, that doesn’t mean he deserved that!

He’s about to say something, hoping to get you in trouble, but he’s interrupted.

“We’ve set your wedding for next week,” his mother says.

“Next week!” You both say simultaneously.

Your parents send you a ferocious glare, making you shut your mouth.

“Yes, next week. Y/N will be moving in as well. We’ve already arranged for your things to be packed and brought here for tomorrow.” Jungwon’s mother gives you a genuine smile, and you almost feel a twinge of relief for a second.

  You can't remember the last time you had a genuine smile directed your way by your parents.

Maybe moving here won't be so bad?

“Can I say something?” You ask out into the open.

Your parents send you another glare, but the king of Valdenia nods, signaling you to speak.

  “I’m honored that you're opening up your home to me. Can I ask that I bring someone with me?”

  “And who would that be, dear?” The queen asks, looking at you with warm eyes.

“Our head maid, Estelle. She’s someone I rely on very much, and I'd hate to be without her,” you respond.

You look at your parents for approval, as do Jungwon’s parents.

“If you are okay with it, then we are as well,” your father says, gesturing to the king and queen.

  “Then it’s settled!” The queen claps; she’s delighted.

As both families continue discussing arrangements and wedding planning, you zone out.

This could either go good or bad.

You'll have to wait and see.

  All your belongings had been moved into Yang’s palace by the next day. 

Your room is enormous, more extensive than your own at home.

Or should you say, your former home?

Your parents didn't even say goodbye to you; although you expected it, it still stung. 

Luckily, you had Estelle.

She, with her belongings, arrived in Valdenia that morning. 

You rushed out to meet her, squeezing her tightly.

“Thank god you're here. I don't know if I could do this without you.”

  The Yangs (minus Jungwon) welcome Estelle with open arms. She helps you unpack, hanging up your dresses, blouses, and pants in your closet.

Meanwhile, you rant to her while sitting on your freshly made bed.

“He didn't even let me introduce myself! He left the second the meeting ended, even when his parents told him not to!”

  “Maybe he's shy, darling.”

  You huff dramatically, “He’s not. He was glaring at me with such hatred in his eyes. If looks could kill, I'd be buried 6 feet under!”

  Estelle sighs, “Maybe he just needs time to adjust. This is probably sudden for him, too.”

You take a deep breath and nod your head. Still a workaholic, Estelle leaves for the kitchen to see if there’s any work she can do.

Boredom finds you quickly, so you leave your room to tour the castle. 

You hear hushed whispers as you reach the end of a long corridor.

You lean in, straining your ears to hear the conversation. 

“I know this is upsetting, my love, but we’ll figure it out.”

You immediately recognize the prince’s voice, but who’s he talking to?

“I just want us to be together like we promised, and now you’re being taken away from me.”

That’s definitely a girl’s voice. 

It’s easy to piece two-and-two together. This is the reason why Jungwon hates you.

He has a girlfriend.

Jungwon speaks again.

“She’s not gonna come in between us. She’s nothing compared to you, Maylee.”

You can’t help but scoff. It’s not like you’re hurt, but he doesn’t even know you. 

“It’s not like you can tell your parents no…just marry her. We can still be together. It’s not like you love her.” Maylee chuckles, and you roll your eyes, silently mocking her.

  As soon as you hear the sound of lips smacking, you rush out of there and go back the way you came. 

You return to your room, staring at the paintings leaning on your desk. You managed to smuggle them out of your old room without your parents noticing. Maybe now you’ll be able to indulge yourself in your art.

  There's a knock at your door.

“Come in!” You shout.

The open door reveals Mrs.Yang, and she smiles at you warmly.

“I came to see how you're settling in.”

She spots your paintings and is immediately intrigued.

“Did you paint these?” She asks, taking one into her hands and admiring it.

“Yes. I've loved painting since I was little. My parents never allowed me to indulge, so I had to do it secretly.”

  “They're amazing.” The Queen gawks, and you feel a twinge of pride. 

 “You must keep painting!” She says, “I'd love to hang up your paintings in the palace.”

  Your eyes widen at her suggestion, “Oh no, I’m not that good. I’m nothing compared to the professionals.”

  “Nonsense.” She waves her hand, “You must allow me to display these. You deserve to be praised. And please allow me to buy you more supplies.”

  You try to decline, but she insists, and you don't have the heart to tell her no.

By the following day, you see your paintings hung in multiple areas of the palace.

  You decide to explore outside the castle, finding yourself in its large outdoor area.

There's a beautiful garden in front of you, and you take your time smelling every flower.

There's a bench in the center, and you sit down and take a deep breath.

  “You can't be here,” a voice behind you says.

Turning, you look Jungwon directly in the eyes, “Says who?”

“Says me, you're not welcome here.”

You bring your finger to your chin, pretending to look up in question.

“Hmm, according to your parents, I’m welcome anywhere and everywhere in and outside this castle. You wouldn't wanna go against their authority, would you?”

  You see his jaw clench, “Can you just leave? This place is reserved.”

You gasp, “Ah! This is you and your girlfriend's little spot, right?”

His eyes widen as he starts to sputter.

“Don’t worry, your secret is safe with me…or is it?”

With that, you get up making your way back inside the castle.

It takes a few seconds before you hear his footsteps rushing to catch up with you.

He grabs your arm, spinning you around to face him. 

  “You’re not gonna say a word about her to my parents, or else.”

You pout playfully, tilting your head, “Or else what?”

He can't help but chuckle in disbelief. He’s never been faced with this kind of attitude.

“I will make your life a living hell.”

It's your turn to chuckle, “I'd love to see you try.”

You take his silence as your cue to leave.

  That night at dinner, Jungwon eats his food roughly, pissed off.

How dare you speak to him the way you did! I mean, are you crazy?

Now, he can't help but keep his eyes on you, praying you don't expose his relationship.

“What did you do today, Y/n?” Mrs. Yang asks.

“I spent some time outside today, in the garden. I ran into Jungwon, and we had…a lovely conversation.”

Jungwon can feel his heart speed up. This is it. You're going to expose him. 

“Oh? What did you talk about?”

You smirk at him from across the table, “Just how excited we are for the wedding!” Only five days to go!”

  Jungwon visibly relaxes, and you catch his eye, sending a wink. 

He glares at you, sucking his teeth.

The eye contact is broken once his mother squeals, clapping her hands excitedly.

“I’m so happy you're both excited! It’ll be beautiful. We’ve made sure of it.”

  “It will truly be magnificent,” his father adds, patting Jungwon on the back.

He smiles, trying to hide his anguish behind his wine glass.

Dinner continues with Jungwon’s mother raving about the wedding: cake, decorations, guests.

“Mrs. Sim said she’s ecstatic to see you get married!”

Wait…the Sim’s? Jungwon suddenly starts to panic inside his head.

“The Sim’s are coming?” He asks, looking at his mother.

“Of course they’re coming, dear! You, Maylee and Jake were the best of friends growing up!”

  A lightbulb suddenly goes off in your head. 

Maylee? Of course, his girlfriend was his childhood friend. This new information sets a fire ablaze in your mind.

You smirk to yourself, shaking your head at the thought. 

“What’s got you smiling, honey?” Mrs. Yang asks.

“Nothing! Just thinking about my dress. I know you said it comes from the best in the world.”

  “Oh absolutely!” And she starts a long tangent of how renowned the maker of your dress is. She tells you small details so as not to ruin the surprise. Maybe it’s weird you haven’t seen your wedding dress, but you trust her word.

  Your eyes meet Jungwon’s again, and you blow him a kiss, chuckling as he looks at you in pure disgust.

  5 DAYS LATER

  When you wake up, your ladies-in-waiting immediately rush you into your bathing chambers. Your hair and body are thoroughly washed and scrubbed, your teeth are brushed, and your skin is prepped.

They bring you to Mrs. Yang’s room where you’ll be getting ready.

She smiles at you, ushering you forward. 

“Are you ready to see your dress?”

You nod, and your nerves are playing with you for some reason. Why are you nervous? 

  She unveils it, and you gasp in disbelief.

It’s beautiful. The neckline dips into a beautiful bodice with a butterfly in the middle. The design continues into the middle of the dress and its sides, with another butterfly at the bottom.

The sleeves are loose and flowy, and the skirt shines.

  “Mrs. Yang…it’s stunning.” 

“Only the best for a stunning girl,” she says, “I noticed that you paint a lot of butterflies, which is why I requested they be incorporated into your dress.”

It’s true. You do love butterflies. You loved trying to catch them when you were younger.

  Your mind begins to wander a bit. You remember imagining the day you’d get married. You didn’t expect it to be arranged, but the one thing you always hoped for was for your mother to be the one to see you in your wedding dress. 

She wasn’t here, yet Mrs. Yang was, and that’s more than you could ask for.

  Mrs. Yang brings in the stylists. They sit you down and begin to dote on you.

You see Estelle out of the corner of your eye and smile at her, giggling as she responds with two thumbs up.

Once your hair is dried and styled, they move onto your makeup. You decided on a light style, not wanting your makeup to outshine your dress.

Once it’s finished, they get you into your dress.

It fits you perfectly, and you almost squeal at how beautiful you look. Not to brag, but you think you look amazing. Once they place the veil on your head, you look complete—a perfect bride.

  The wedding is being held in the palace courtyard, with friends and family of the Yang’s filling up both sides of the seating. 

You’re not surprised to learn your parents didn’t come. 

But you have Estelle, and that’s all that matters to you.

  You make your way to the palace doors, knowing it has begun when the music starts to play.

Estelle stands by your side, ready to walk you down the aisle.

“You look beautiful. I never thought I’d see this day.”

“You’re all I need, Estelle. Thank you.”

As the doors open, you see everyone standing and looking your way.

You keep your gaze forward, walking one step at a time.

  Jungwon looks handsome. You can’t deny it. His suit is white to match your dress, and his black hair contrasts beautifully with it.

As Jungwon stares you down, he can’t deny you look beautiful.

You hear gasps and whispers as you make your way past the crowds. 

“She looks stunning.” 

“What a beautiful girl.”

“Jungwon is a lucky man.”

You chuckle to yourself if only they knew.

  Once you reach the end of the aisle, you stand across from Jungwon as Estelle takes her seat up front at your request.

Jungwon carefully lifts the veil, putting it behind you.

As you look into each other's eyes, you see something in his, an emotion you can’t put your finger on.

The minister clears his throat, bringing everyone’s attention to him. 

“Dearly beloved. We are gathered here today to witness the union of Y/N and Jungwon. Two souls brought together to become one. One soul, one body, one heart, and one mind. If anything should object to this marriage, speak now or forever hold your peace.”

  No one says a word. The silence is almost deafening.

  “Let’s begin. Marriage is a partnership of trust and dependence to one another while walking life’s long path. Marriage is about communication and commitment, sacrifice when needed, and love in the best and worst times. 

It takes time to build a good marriage, and we hope for nothing but the best for our bride and groom.”

  The minister turns to you.

“Y/N, do you take Jungwon to be your lawfully wedded husband? Will you love and cherish him; trust and commit to him, through joy and pain, in sickness and health, for as long as you both shall live?”

  You take a deep breath, “I do.”

“Jungwon, do you take Y/N to be your lawfully wedded wife. Will you love and cherish her; trust and commit to her, through joy and pain, in sickness and in health, for as long as you both shall live?”

  “I do,” he says, and as he smiles at you for a second, you almost think it’s genuine.

“Then, with the power invested in me, I pronounce you, huband and wife. You may now kiss your bride!”

  Kiss? Nobody mentioned a kiss.

Jungwon knows what his parents expect, so he takes your face into his hands with a heavy heart, pulling you forward and molding his lips to yours. 

You want to feel disgusted, but you can’t. You kiss him back, wrapping your arms around his neck.

The cheers in the background drown out as your lips move passionately.

What’s happening? Are you and Jungwon not supposed to hate each other? 

  As you pull away, you notice your lipgloss has transferred onto Jungwon’s lips.

Instinctively, you raise your hand to wipe the lipgloss off, making the crowd chuckle.

Jungwon takes your hand as you turn to the crowd, waving as pictures are taken every second.

You walk back down the aisle, entering the castle for the reception in the grand hall room.

There’s food, drinks, music and most importantly the cake.

Everyone sits to eat. There’s a large selection on the menu.

You decide on a crab-based dish, putting on a bib to avoid getting anything on your dress. 

Jungwon sits beside you, eating his food and being quiet.

  Once everyone has finished eating, people start chanting for you to cut the cake.

You and Jungwon, along with everyone else, gather around it, and you cut the cake together.

Cheers erupt, and without thinking, you put some frosting on your finger before smearing it on Jungwon’s cheek.

Laughter fills the air as Jungwon looks at you in shock.

He doesn’t hesitate to fire back, targeting your cheek.

  You laugh as he kisses your cheek, smearing the frosting.

After enjoying the cake, a delicious vanilla custard that you adored, you make small talk with all of Jungwon’s family and relatives.

“Where are Jungwon, Jake, and Maylee?” Mrs. Yang asks. 

“Those three are always doing something secretive. Y/N, would you be a dear and go find them?” Mrs. Sim asks you, and you nod, getting up and leaving the room.

  You don’t care to find them, so you wander the halls aimlessly until you hear shouting coming from an empty corridor.

“What the hell was that?” That voice definitely doesn’t belong to Jungwon so it must be Jake.

“What are you talking about?” Jungwon asks, confused as to why he’s being yelled at.

“You were practically all over her!” Jake yells.

“You looked so in love,” a feminine voice says, that must be Maylee.

  “I’m not in love with her. We hate each other!” Jungwon insists, looking between the Sim siblings.

“Well, it didn’t look that way to me!” Jake retaliates.

“I just watched you marry and kiss another girl. Don’t you realize how terrible I feel?” Maylee asks.

“I get it,” Jungwon says, “But I had to look convincing to my parents!”

  “That bitch certainly didn’t seem to mind having you to herself,” Maylee says.

You clear your throat, smirking as the three look at you like deer caught in headlights.

“The next time you wanna argue and talk shit about somebody, maybe don’t yell and cause a commotion about it.” 

You walk forward, standing in front of Maylee, who’s between Jungwon and Jake.

“And next time… come say it to my face. Don’t be a pussy.” You throw the bouquet in her face, turn around, and walk back.

“You may need that,” you say as you leave the three dumbfounded.

  You devise some weak excuse about how you couldn’t find them, but within a minute, they all come shuffling back into the grand hall.

The night ends with everyone congratulating you and Jungwon as you hang off his arm. You catch Maylee’s eye as the Sim’s are leaving. You can’t help but be petty, shooting a wink and waving her way. She glares ferociously before being ushered out by her mother.

  You yawn, the day's events catching up to you. 

“Are you tired, sweetheart?” Mrs. Yang asks, cooing at you as you nod sleepily.

“You’re in luck. We just had your bedroom cleaned and prepared for you both,” Mr. Yang says.

“Wait,” Jungwon interrupts, “What do you mean for us both?”

“Well, now that you’re married, it only makes sense to share a bedroom!”

  You and Jungwon look at each other and then back to his parents.

“I understand your point, but we still barely know each other. Isn’t it a bit soon?” you ask, Jungwon nodding in agreement. 

“Nonsense! If anything, this will help you get closer!” Mr. Yang responds.

  Before you can argue any further, they bid you both goodnight. 

You both stand there for a few seconds, taking in this absolute setup.

“We could just not sleep in the same room? They don’t have to know,” you suggest.

Jungwon shakes his head, “They’ll know. They’re parents, they know everything.”

  “So you wanna sleep in the same room?”

“I don’t want to,” Jungwon says exasperated, “But we’ll have to.”

It turns out that the bedroom is the second-best in the castle, only after the king and queen’s.

“We can move all our stuff in here tomorrow. Let’s just wash up, get changed, and go to bed,” Jungwon says before making his way to his now-old room.

  “Wait!” You call out.

He turns around, raising an eyebrow.

“Can you unzip me? I can’t reach it.” 

Jungwon doesn’t think anything of it, reaching to unzip your dress.

That is until he sees the expanse of your smooth skin. Before he can stop himself, he’s gently running his hand down the middle of your back.

You freeze, not expecting his touch.

He snaps out of it and, before you can say anything, runs, leaving you in the corridor.

  You turn to your room, undressing and wearing comfortable sleepwear.

You enter the bath chambers and wash off your makeup, putting your hair into a protective style.

You return to the bedroom, finding Jungwon hasn’t arrived yet.

  The room is even bigger than yours. When you check out the closet, it expands even farther than yours.

The bath chamber has a tub, a separate shower, and two sinks. On one side of the room, there’s even a couch.

It’s perfect for two people.

  You hear the door close behind you, and Jungwon clears his throat.

“I can sleep on the couch so that you can sleep in the bed,” he says, already making his way to it.

“No, I’ll sleep on the couch!” You protest, grabbing an extra blanket from the closet.

  “I can’t allow that. As much as we don’t like each other, I can’t let a lady be uncomfortable.”

You sigh, “Then we’ll both sleep in the bed, just keep some space between us.”

Jungwon nods, and you both make your way to the bed.

You get in first, making yourself comfortable, and Jungwon follows suit.

Neither of you say anything, nor do you say goodnight.

Sleep overtakes you quickly.

  When you wake up, you notice an arm around your waist.

Looking beside you, Jungwon is still fast asleep.

You carefully remove his arm around you and leave the bed.

Heading to the bath chambers, you quickly shower, brush your teeth, and wash your face.

Jungwon is still asleep when you return, so you head down to breakfast without him.

  The king and queen are nowhere to be found, but breakfast is still laid out, ready to be eaten.

You sit down, preparing your napkin before digging in.

About ten minutes later, Jungwon enters the dining hall, hair disheveled and pajamas slightly unbuttoned.

He says nothing as he sits next to you and starts to eat.

He looks cute, you hate to admit.

His eyes are puffy from sleep and his cheeks are slightly bloated.

  “What are you staring at?” He asks.

“Nothing!” You respond, quickly turning back to your food.

It’s quiet for a few minutes before you speak again, “You must’ve slept well last night, considering I woke up with your arm around me.”

Jungwon freezes beside you, side-eyeing as you try to hold in your chuckle.

  “I normally hold a pillow when I sleep. It must’ve been an accident.”

You hum, not believing him for a second.

“I ran into my parents before coming here. They said we’re having dinner with the Sim’s tonight.”

  You sigh, “Do I have to deal with your girlfriend and her brother again?”

“No, but maybe don’t provoke her either?”

“But it’s fun,” you pout playfully. 

“Not for me. I get all the backlash!”

“Well, maybe tell them to knock it off!”

With that, you get up and finish your breakfast.

You go to your old room where all your clothes reside and bring them into the new room.

Jungwon had the decency to take up only one side of the closet with his things.

  Next is moving your paintings. The room has enough space to line them up nicely by the large window.

You prepare for the rest of the day, taking a long, hot shower and getting dressed in one of your gowns.

You head to the garden, sitting on the bench with your paints and canvas.

The sky is still shedding its orange rays.

So you sit, and you paint.

You paint until your hands become numb from holding your palette and brush. 

  By the time you’ve finished, the sky has shed its previous colors and welcomed a beautiful blue.

You paint that as well, blending the colors seamlessly. 

You paint the clouds, their shadows, and the scenery before you.

Each flower is painted with details someone else might never see.

But you see everything.

  You hear footsteps approaching from behind you, and Jungwon’s voice graces your ears, “The Sim’s are here. I was sent to get you.”

  Your eyes widen. How rude of you not to be there when guests arrive.

You quickly gather up your paints, brushes, and palette.

Finding your hands full, you look to Jungwon for help.

He takes note and carefully takes your painting into one hand, his other occupied by your easel.

You take numerous fast-paced steps ahead of him, rushing to get inside.

“Calm down, they’re not upset.”

You send him a glare as you walk even faster.

  When you reach the bedroom, you put everything away, Jungwon carefully setting down your easel and painting.

You stand in front of the full-length mirror beside the closet door and fix your appearance.

Rushing wasn’t a good idea as your hair is now disheveled, strands flying everywhere.

You brush your fingers through it, calming any flyaways and loose hair.

  Turning around, you see Jungwon still there, staring you down.

“What?” You ask. “Is there something wrong?”

“No, you look fine. Let’s go.”

He holds out his arm, looking for you to interlock yours. 

You do as such, putting your other hand over his.

When you arrive in the dining hall, the Sim’s, minus the siblings, look at you both warmly.

Jungwon pulls your chair out, and you thank him quietly before he sits beside you.

  Everyone begins to eat while the parents start a quiet conversation.

You can feel eyes on you, but you don’t look up to catch them.

“So,” Mrs. Sim says, “How’s married life treating you both?”

You put on your “fake but real” smile. “Well, it’s only been a day. I don’t think we’ve experienced any real marriage life yet.”

Mrs. Yang interrupts you, “Nonsense. I heard them having a couples spat the other day. Of course, I don't know what it was about, but it’s not my business. They’re both adults. They can keep it between themselves.”

  The Sim’s laugh, and the Yang’s as you and Jungwon smile awkwardly.

“Oh, and they don’t know this, but I went into their room to check on them this morning. It was so cute how Jungwon wrapped his arm around you while you slept,” Mrs. Yang says, turning to you.

  Jungwon suddenly chokes on his food, coughing violently as you hit his back.

Mrs. Yang looks at Jungwon, “Careful, sweetie. Maybe I shouldn’t have said anything, but I couldn't help it! My baby boy is embarrassed,” she coos.

“Mom,” Jungwon grumbles as he finally stops choking.

He looks at Maylee to find her glaring straight at him, and he gulps heavily.

  “Excuse me, I have to use the restroom,” Maylee says, quickly ushering herself out of the dining hall.

After five minutes, her parents question her whereabouts, and Jungwon takes this as his chance.

“I’ll go look for her!”

He rushes off, running through the corridors looking for her.

Suddenly, he hears a crash coming from the bedroom.

He darts to it and finds himself in the middle of Maylee destroying your paintings.

“What the hell are you doing!” He yells, dragging her away from the now slashed canvases.

His yell alerts everyone still at the table, and they’re rushing in within seconds.

  You get one look at your destroyed paintings before you collapse on your knees, tears streaming down your cheeks.

“What did you do?” you ask, looking at Maylee and Jungwon.

“This is what you get for stealing my man, bitch!”

The Sim’s and Yang’s look between you and Maylee before Mrs. Sim speaks up, “Sim Maylee, what on earth are you talking about!”

  “You wanna know the truth,” she starts, “Jungwon and I have been dating for three years. 3! And all of a sudden, this bitch makes her grand entrance as his soon-to-be wife? Are you fucking kidding me? She’s been cuddling up to him this whole time, and I’m sick of it!”

  You get up, and before anyone can blink, you slap Maylee across the face, “How dare you. You’re mad about our arranged marriage, so you destroy my life’s work?”

She holds her now red cheek, staring at you in disbelief.

You turn to Jungwon, “I know you hate me, but this is too far.”

With that, you turn and leave the room, running through the corridor and leaving the castle.

You run and run as far as your feet will take you.

  Jungwon turns to Maylee, “This…this was too much Maylee.”

“So it’s true?” Mrs. Yang interjects

“Yes, mother, it’s true. I said nothing because I knew we’d be forced to break up if you found out. We planned to keep our relationship a secret even after my marriage.”

He turns back to Maylee, “How could you do this?”

“Why are you defending her?” she shouts. “I’m your girlfriend; you should be on my side.”

  “But you’ve crossed the line, Maylee, and dragged me into your mess, too!”

Mrs. Sim crosses the room and yanks her daughter by the arm. “Let’s go! Say goodbye because, as far as I’m concerned, you two will not see each other anymore.”

She drags Maylee out as she struggles in her mother’s hold while Mr. Sim puts his hand on Jake’s shoulder, dragging him out as well.

  The Yang’s are left in the room, glaring at their son.

“I’m very disappointed in you,” his father says.

Jungwon hangs his head in shame, “I know. I just… didn’t want to end my relationship with Maylee. We fell in love over time and never had the guts to tell any of you. But I don’t condone this! I would’ve never done something like this!”

  “You need to find Y/N and apologize to her immediately. You should’ve stopped Maylee’s actions when she first showed hostility.”

Jungwon nods, and with that, he begins his search for you.

He passes some maids, asking where you went, and they tell him you ran outside the castle.

As he makes his way outside, a guard rushes up to him. “Prince Jungwon, the princess ran out here in a frenzy. We tried to go after her but were ordered not to leave our post. She ran into the woods outside the castle!”

  Jungwon books it, running as fast as he can, shouting your name. He runs through trees, swatting branches out of his way.

Then, he hears it. Soft sniffles came from in front of him.

He approaches you carefully, not wanting to startle you or make you run away.

“Y/N?”

  You turn around, glaring once you see it’s him.

Standing up, you begin to walk away from him, but he’s faster and grabs your arm.

“Wait! Please let me explain! I had nothing to do with Maylee destroying your paintings. I didn’t tell her to do it. I didn’t participate. I don’t hate you. I’ve been in the wrong this whole time. I treated you terribly when you did nothing wrong, and I’m sorry.”

  “Those paintings were priceless to me, Jungwon. What am I supposed to do now?” 

He takes your hand, “Make new ones and new memories?”

You bite your lip, “You’re right, and I’m sorry, too. I was hostile towards you when you were also in a shitty situation.”

He waves his hand, “Let bygones be bygones and regarding Maylee, I think it’s fair to consider her my ex now.”

  Jungwon holds out his hand, “Let’s go home?”

You take his hand, and the both of you make your way back to the castle. 

Mr. and Mrs. Yang welcome you back with open arms, literally holding you in their arms. For the first time in forever, you feel like you’re with family. 

Estelle helps you and Jungwon clean up the destroyed paintings. You decide to throw everything away, wanting to make new memories like Jungwon said. 

  That night, you and Jungwon get into bed with a newfound friendship.

  The morning light shines through the curtains, and it makes you squint. 

You look beside you and see Jungwon is gone.

Sitting up, you stretch before preparing to get out of bed. 

“Hold it right there! Breakfast in bed for the lady.” Jungwon comes in with a whole tray of food. Pancakes, eggs, bacon, and toast, with a glass of orange juice.

“Jungwon, you don’t have to do nice things for me. We’ve forgiven each other for past mistakes. There’s no need for this,” you say, smiling at him.

  “I want to do this. I want to make up for my wrongdoings, so please, just let me,” he pleads.

He sets the tray down in front of you. 

You pick up your fork and knife, cutting into the pancakes. You hold out your fork for Jungwon, “Say ah!”

A light blush dusts Jungwon’s cheeks, but he accepts the food graciously. 

You gesture for him to sit next to you in bed, “Let’s talk.”

He complies, “Talk about what?”

“Anything,” you say, “What are your plans for today?”

  “I didn’t have any plans for today. I thought maybe we could go out and paint! I’ve never done it before, but it looks fun!”

You smile as you eat, “I think that’s a great idea.”

When you (and Jungwon) have finished breakfast, you gather all your art supplies again and make your way outside the castle, this time with Jungwon in tow. 

“So, first things first. There are no rules when it comes to art. You can do whatever you want, as long as you like it.”

  You’re facing the woods, so you tell Jungwon to paint that. He begins, and within half an hour, he’s finished. He presents his final product to you like a shy kid, and you can’t help but coo.

Surprisingly, it’s not bad for a complete beginner.

“So right off the bat, I can tell you understand color. What you’re missing is lighting and shading. Notice how some are lighter when the sun hits the trees while the branches in the back are darker?”

  As you ramble on and on, Jungwon can’t help but think you look beautiful. You’re talking passionately, and he can’t stop staring in awe. 

He doesn’t even realize you're calling his name until you snap your fingers in front of his face.

“Are you listening? This is important!”

“Sorry,” he says, shaking his head. “I can just tell how much you love art, and I think it’s cool.”

  You hum, “Well, thank you. What about you? What’s your favorite thing?”

Jungwon contemplates momentarily before looking down at the grass, “I don’t have one.”

You frown, sitting next to him on the bench.

“That’s okay!” you say. “We can find your favorite thing; we just have to experiment!”

  Painting class for the day officially ends there, as you’re now determined to help Jungwon.

As you walk the corridor castles, you ask, “So, what do you like to do?”

“I like sports. The guys and I usually play rugby when we’re all free.”

You recall being introduced to 5 other boys who Jungwon said he grew up with, Jake included.

“I don’t think you can teach me that.” You laugh as Jungwon smiles shyly beside you.

“What else?” You ask.

“Well, I like to sing.”

“Really?” You ask, surprised.

  Jungwon nods, “I always loved putting on performances for my parents when I was younger.”

“Well, sing for me!”

“But I’m shy,” he says, looking down as his cheeks become red.

“Come on,” you whine, dragging out the n, “I’m your wife. You don’t need to be shy in front of me.”

“Not you pulling the wife card.” He laughs.

“Please.” You pout, putting on your best puppy eyes.

Jungwon takes a deep breath before he starts to sing, and you’re immediately captivated.

  His voice is like honey. It’s smooth but slightly raspy, and it’s like an angel singing in your ears.

When he finishes, you clap excitedly.

“Jungwon, you’re so good!”

He gives a small thanks while you keep walking.

You think you’ve found a new obsession.

  Jungwon sits on the picnic blanket beside you, singing quietly to you as you watch the sky.

You sit up abruptly, causing Jungwon to stop.

“Do you think in a different universe, we would’ve been friends first before anything?”

Jungwon ponders for a moment, “I don’t see why not. Let me ask you something: do you think we could make our marriage work?”

  You turn to Jungwon, eyebrow raised, “You mean, like, romantically? I didn’t know you felt that way about me.” You smirk, causing Jungwon to turn away quickly.

“I mean, you’re beautiful. I can’t help but think, now that things are good between us, maybe it wouldn’t hurt to try. The last thing I want is to be in a loveless marriage.”

  “Sure, we can try.” You turn yourself towards Jungwon, touching his cheek to make him face you.

“Kiss me,” you say.

Jungwon’s eyes widened. They dart to your lips quickly before finding your eyes, “So suddenly?”

You figure he’s not going to do it, so you do.

Leaning forward, you capture his lips with yours.

He kisses you back, pulling you closer with a hand behind your head.

His lips are soft, and he tastes like the strawberries and chocolate you had.

  It’s passionate. It feels like sparks are going off. This kiss is different from the one you shared on your wedding day. This one feels natural like it’s a kiss with love and not for show.

Before it can go any further, you pull away, giggling as Jungwon chases your lips.

He whines, “Don’t tease me!”

“I’m sorry! You’re just too cute.”

“Don’t wanna be cute to you,” he mumbles.

“You don’t wanna be cute? Do you wanna be more than that? Like what?”

“Handsome, hot, sexy?”

“Who said I don't find you hot, handsome, and sexy?”  

  Jungwon smirks, “Do you?”

You push Jungwon’s shoulder back, throwing your leg over his, straddling his lap.

He brings his hands to your waist, holding it tightly.

“What if I said I think you’re the sexiest, hottest, most handsome man I’ve ever seen?”

He rubs circles into your waist, “I'd say you're the sexiest, hottest, most beautiful woman I've ever seen.”

You lean in for another kiss, nipping Jungwon’s bottom lip. 

  God knows how long you spent there. After coming inside, you sit down for dinner with the Yang's.

“So, what did you two do today?” Mrs. Yang asks.

“We had a picnic!” You respond. “Jungwon prepared everything, and it was amazing.”

Mrs. Yang asks for details, and the two women talk excitedly while Jungwon looks at you with fondness. 

  As you lay in bed that night, you think about how drastically your relationship with Jungwon has changed.

You dreaded this marriage, being forced to be with someone you didn't love. And now? Your perspective has completely changed. 

Jungwon is a fantastic person. You wish you had seen it earlier.

  Do you think you could fall in love with Jungwon? You believe you already have. While the thought almost scares you, your feelings for Jungwon overcome that.

Your thoughts are interrupted when Jungwon comes out of the bathroom, having thoroughly washed up.

He joins you in bed, turning to face you as you smile at him.

“What?” He asks, smiling back at you.

  You raise your hand, stroking the area above his eyebrow, moving the hair in the way. 

“I think I love you, Jungwon.”

Jungwon's eyes widen, and then they soften.

“I think I love you too, Y/N.”

You don't say anything else as you lean in, kissing him.

“Goodnight.”

“Goodnight, my love.”

  2 WEEKS LATER

Jungwon plays with your hair as your head lays in his lap. His nimble fingers find their way to your cheek, grazing over it. 

You look up at him, meeting his eyes.

Puckering your lips, he laughs, bringing his to yours in a sweet kiss.

“There's a festival in the town tonight. Do you wanna go?” He asks.

“What’s it gonna be like?”

“Games, music, food, the works.”

“Sounds fun, I'd love to go!”

  Night comes quickly, and you've just finished preparing for the festival. 

Jungwon comes out of the bathroom, ready as well. 

“You look beautiful, my love,” he says, coming up behind you to wrap his arms around you. 

“And you look dashing.”

  The festival is in full swing by the time you and Jungwon arrive.  

People greet you as you pass, giving you gifts and free things. 

You take them all graciously, thanking them for their generosity. 

  You and Jungwon find a private spot, taking time to admire the view of the town ahead. 

“I got you something,” he says.

You turn to him, eyebrows furrowing when he pulls out a small box.

  “I know we had a rocky start, but I have to say that these past few weeks with you have been some of the best I've ever had. I know our vows weren't exactly the most genuine, but now, I mean those words genuinely. You are an amazing, passionate, loving, caring woman, and I love everything about you. I truly promise the rest of my life to you.”

  With that, he opens the box, presenting a beautiful gold necklace. You gasp in surprise as he shows it to you. 

“Jungwon, it's stunning.”

“I got our initials engraved on it, so we're always together no matter what.”

  As he puts it on you, you think to yourself, maybe this life was meant for you.

In the end, you got your fairytale ending.

note: this took me entirely too long but it's done!! i hope you all enjoy!

taglist: @jiamini @dokidokior @26796i