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#💫 [ hey bitch! ]
church-of-luci · 8 months
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About Luciferism
A fult centered around an introject of Lucifer Morningstar from Hazbin Hotel!
We believe all beings are capable of redemption. We welcome all, especially those who wish to be redeemed. We are a safe place and a sanctuary for all who are misunderstood, misplaced, and mistreated. No matter who you are, you are safe here.
(While we’re welcoming of all, we ask that if you are racist, ableist, LGBTphobic, pluralphobic, etc., that you be open to change and redemption. We are a safe space, yes, but we do not condone any harm towards oppressed groups or any being.)
Beliefs
• All beings are capable of redemption
• All beings are entitled to autonomy
• Heaven is flawed, as all beings are flawed
• Love and acceptance do more than hate and exlusion
• Pro-radqueer, pro-transID, pro-para, radinclus
Worship Tools
• Pentagrams
• Apples
• Rubber ducks (or ducks in general)
• Whiskey (if it’s legal for you!)
• Snakes
• Chocolate
• Singing/Music (bonus points for Broadway!)
• Art & Writing (tag me to be reblogged!)
Tags
#🍎 [ from the tree ] -> Luci talks
#🐍 [ sacrificial lambs ] -> asks
#💫 [ hey bitch! ] -> member reblogs
#🎨 [ that’s me! ] -> art reblogs
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dumbbitchgalore · 4 months
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tf141 hanging out together and finding out that old man!Price has a girlfriend 💫
The crowded pub bustles with the commontion of drunkards of varying degrees. Some slightly tipsy while others have decided to forgo their pants in the name of the King.
And then there's a group of men occupying a table at the corner of the pub. Simon with his balaclava on, Kyle with a cigarette between his fingers savouring the arcid flavour and Johnny ogling some girls on the other side of the pub.
All that was left was John, who makes his way to the table with four pints of beer. He sits down at the table with a grunt as he passes each on of the boys a glass. They all start chatting and catching up about everything's thats happened after Price's retirement.
Johnny begins to bitch and whine about the new captain saying how uptight he was critising everything the squad does that John would've probably turned a blind eye to.
John chuckles slightly, listening to them all talk about what's is going on with the taskforce. Despite the smile on his face, there is a bitter resentment inside of him, gnawing at him.
Useless, useless, useless
He takes a swig of his drink hoping that it'll calm his worries down. And lo and behold he receives a call from you, his baby. He smiles to himself and picks up the phone.
"Hey birdie, doing okay by yourself at home?" He asks softly.
That one sentence caught the attention of the other boys as they give each other quizzical looks. Who the hell could their former captain be talking to?
His mother, maybe his sisters? Nah, he wouldn't call any other birdie.
They listen to John's gravelly voice and breathy laughs as he talks to the mystery person on the phone.
What felt like hours to the boys and a few fleeting seconds for John, he hangs up and faces the group. He raises an eyebrow when he sees their faces contorted into expressions of confusion and curiosity.
"What?" John asks slightly defensively
"Who's the birdie, Captain?" Johnny asks with a tooth grin.
John shakes his head, "my girlfriend." he says in a matter-of-fact tone.
Their jaws drop to the floor. Shocked would be an understatement as to what they were feeling and thinking right now.
"You sure it's not schizophrenia, sir?" Kyle asks.
John huffs in annoyance. What the hell? Couldn't they just accept that John finally had someone in his life. A perfect little doll who patiently waits for him at home.
They all start to laugh obnoxiously, barking and howling as if they were witnessing a circus show. And John's irritation grew tenfold and he huffs a sigh of annoyance.
"Oi captain, why don't you show us a picture of your birdie and then maybe we'll believe ya. Or well just keep thinking that the sarin gas is still in your system." Simon says, followed by a cackle.
John rolls his eyes and opens his photo gallery and shows the trio a photo of you and him. The picture is of the two of you in bed, with you resting your head on his shoulder with a smile on your face as John is still fast asleep. Evidence of the previous night's lustful tendancies still apparent on both of them.
This time their jaws drop for certain as the tangible evidence is placed in front of them. You're beautiful, and that fucked-out, post orgasm face is something else. This isn't fair. How did Price get blessed with a beauty such as yourself.
Soap scowls and scoffs looking away and crossing his arms in annoyance. While Kyle gushes about how lucky Price his to hide his jealously rearing its ugly head. And simon simply stares at the photo with a discerning expression on his face.
John smiply smiles, his ego fuelled and his pride sky high.
"Well boys, I gotta get back to my doll. Maybe next time I'll bring her along." He exits the pub, leaving the boys all confused and jealous.
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w0rmm1lk · 8 months
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Texting.
Reader: not mentioned.
characters: all characters i write for (besides kota and eri)
type: can be read as both platonic and romantic
sumarry: how i think the mha characters would text.
warnings: possible swearing, denki being denki.
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👾Mina Ashido👾
she abuses her emoji privledges. like nobody will ever receive a message from her that doesn't have an emoji. lots of all caps.
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👓Tenya Iida👓
oh you were texting him? bitch writes as if he's writing a formal email. your ass is lucky that he doesn't start that shit off with "I hope this message finds you well.". not even kidding will proof read every message he sends at least twice.
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♾️Ochaco Uraraka♾️
will end every message that isnt on a serious topic with :D. its so sweet tbh.
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⚡Denki Kaminari⚡
this man uses so many abbreviations that even if you think you use a lot just know you're learning a new one everyday. not even kidding makes up his own shit. once sent mina "lmkiydthesicci" and nobody could figure out wtf he meant. lowkey flirting with every mssg he sends. every single person in the class, girl or not has received a message from him that just says "hey bbg ;)". he received a very long lecture from iida and a very confused reply from todoroki. todoroki didn't actually know wtf bbg meant. thought he misspelled bbq at first.
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🪨Kirishima🪨
unironically sends messages that just say "rawr". uses the :} face a lot bc he thinks it looks like his unbreakable.
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🐙Mezou Shoji🐙
i feel like he has such a low screentime that if anyone needs to text him he's only available for like an hour a day. accidentally leaves ppl on read. messages seem very bland usually.
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❄️Shoto Todoroki🔥
another bland person but tbh hes the worst out of them all. like he can look at a whole paragraph asking him if he wants to go to the movies with the rest of the class and all he will reply with is just "ok." uses periods at the end of every message but I swear he's not mad.
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💥 Bakugo💥
if he receives any messages past 8pm the "reply" will be you getting left on delivered even if he's still up, or a message just saying "shut the fuck up and go to bed.". also bland but he's more of a "k" bland rather than a "ok." bland.
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🥦Izuku Midoryia🥦
he will not even kidding receive a message that just says "hi" and will send a whole paragraph that is basically just a lengthened "hi! how are you?". uses the smiley emoji a lot.
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💫Momo Yaoyorozu💫
lots of ! at the end of messages, you can feel the happiness through your phone screen. uses heart emojis at the end of messages and memorizes the meaning of each color so she can use them accordingly.
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🖤Shihai Kuroiro🖤
another :} user, sometimes uses :] but mainly :}. only ever texts ppl at hours like 2-4 am. you cant convince me he gets enough sleep.
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👔Neito Monoma👔
you think hed text you?/j kinda just an average texter, any message about class 1a will be in all caps.
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😈Dabi😈
oh look. another bland ass texter, at least he takes the time to actually type out "okay," only sends emojis if he's talking about how weird the emoji looks.
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🔪Himiko Toga🔪
uses :] all the time. not :}, or :). just :]. if anyone texts her, even if its just a simple "hi." and she isn't busy, congrats you've agreed to a 3 hour face time call.
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✋Tomura Shigaraki✋
he leaves everyone on read. if you question why he left you on read all you're getting is an "if its so important then talk to me face to face."
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🃏Mr. Compress🃏
so you know how earlier i said you were lucky Iida didnt start with "I hope this message finds you well,"? your luck ran out. he writes it like you're a long distant friend who he is sending some fancy ass shit letter to. not even kidding ends each message with "--Compress."
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🪽Hawks🪽
types so fast his phone doesnt even register his hands. half his messages be looking like "se tht ouds ood". he doesn't even bother to edit it or correct himself.
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👁️Aizawa👁️
he texts like a dad. texting this mf be like:
"ok👍"
"*photo of a weird boat*"
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🌙Midnight🌙
miss girl uses so many ;) that its hard to tell if shes suggesting something weird or not. ended every greetings message with that one kissy emoji.
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🙂Mirio Togata🙂
uses the 🙂 all the time because he thinks it looks like him. it does.
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🌀Nejire Hado🌀
lots of !!! and :D, also uses the :> a lot lol. lots of blue heart emojis aswell.
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🦋Tamaki Amajiki🦋
sends articles about different butterflies he likes or thinks the person he sends it to would like along with a message along the lines of "I think this fits you :]". rarely texts first but when he does he clicks send and sitts on the other side of the bed as his phone while staring at it intensely, just waiting for the reply notif. wont actually read the reply for a good minute.
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🐈‍⬛Hitoshi Shinsou🐈‍⬛
sends photos of random animals he sees while out and about. usually just cats. (no way this man doesn't feed the strays around ua) another person that only texts at night time.
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🛠️Mei Hastume🛠️
uses >:D a lot, shows blueprints of her new babies all the time, ngl they are usually rlly messy. texts are just :
"LOOK AT THIS NEW BABY IN PROGRESS >:D"
"* incomprehensible image of a blueprint *"
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⭐Yo Shindo⭐
uses the thumbs up way to much but like in the passive aggresive way yk? but also if you send him a photo of something ur proud of he will reply with a simple "oh that's cool!" but there's so much fucking emotion behind it ur just kinda like ???
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🛡Melissa Shield🛡
her messages are so sweet. sunset pictures of the ocean every other day. lots of :).
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wrote this is one go and now my hands hate me. i think this was at least 20 characters-? idk I'm struggling to count.
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bitchlessdino · 2 years
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i just read fuck marry kill and it was sooooooo good gah i love it , idk if its rude to ask thos but can u make a mingyu wonu and seungcheol version of it too? they are my baises and i would love something like that !! u can alternate the setting if u please :>
tysm 💘
-💫
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Pairing: fem!reader x ex!mingyu x seungcheol x wonwoo
Genre: smut
Word count: 5.6k
tags: poly, exhibitionism, voyeurism, degradation, pet names (princess), unprotected sex (except cheol), praise kink, spanking, clit slapping, fingering, oral (rec. and giving), u, pussy slapping, ass play, triple penetration
Summary: one dumb party game makes a comeback.
author note: tbh i initally wondered how someone could ask to replace some of the members in the original, but then I realized how grateful that it got the attention it did that another version was requested. these were honestly really fun to write and I'm glad to have found a way to tie in the last version and this one to make a spinoff!
“Fuck Cheol, obvious because he has the experience. Marry Wonwoo because he just seems like he knows how to treat someone well. And duh, kill Mingyu because he’s Mingyu.”
“You’re such a bitch.”
You glance back at the man you hypothetically killed, now giving you a cold dead stare, making you grin smugly before taking a swig from your beer. “Takes one to know one.”
He raises a brow, now leering at you, “I hope you’re alone forever.” 
You slightly slam your empty bottle on the coffee table, “And I can already tell you’re halfway there.”
He scoffs, crossing his arms, “Oh yeah, remind me again who approached who?”
“Remind me again who also dumped who?”
Mingyu was baffled. It had been months since you both had broken up and you still used that to pull over his head. You had your reasons for ending things, he knew that but had hoped to salvage some of the good left in your relationship with him. Once it was over, you mutually agreed on being friends, willing to forget about all that’s happened because you were friends first, but he knew that better than anyone, that shit was never easy.
“Uh, guys?”
Wonwoo’s voice, despite being as timid as it was, asserted attention with two words alone. Mingyu and you look at Wonwoo, still angry at one another, but melt at their friend’s concern, putting aside their petty disagreement. You exhale in an attempt of calming your heart rate and pat Wonwoo’s hand reassuringly, “We’re good. Just how we are. Mingyu gets it.”
Wonwoo was never one for conflict. He was the glue to hold this entire group together. If it wasn’t for him, the terror couple would've never made up the way they did.
“Yeah, we’re just horsing around, but that does remind me,” Mingyu is quick to turn the attention to Seungcheol, a cheeky smile bright on the younger man’s face, “You promised to discuss the details of what happened after the birthday party.”
The eldest arches a brow, amused by Mingyu’s statement, and decides to entertain the idea, “When the hell did I promise that?”
“You didn’t, but you might as well after I caught that group chat,” Mingyu scoots closer to him,  “Go on, tell us all about you having to share with three other dicks.”
Seungcheol clicks his tongue, already scolding him. “There were two other dicks, first of all. Secondly, it just happened. You can’t really plan a foursome.”
You peer over at him intrigued. “You technically can, but considering you just did it out of nowhere, I don’t know whether to be disgusted or impressed. I thought you’d be way more responsible and boring than that.”
His eyes shoot back at your assumption. “I am not fucking boring and you can be responsible in an orgy! We all knew what were doing, we all consented, and we were all clean–”
“Boring…get on to the part where three of your dicks were in her at once.” A flying head smack makes its destination to the back of Mingyu’s head and instantly he’s offended, glaring back at his assailant. “Hey!”
“Don’t talk about anything you’re uncomfortable with Cheol. It’s your dick, it’s your sex life,” You reassure.
“Well, it’s not just my story to tell so I’ll leave it at this.” All ears perk in his direction, even Wonwoo, who was quietly observing, couldn’t help but ponder on the rare experience Seungcheol had at that birthday party. “There is nothing more satisfying than seeing a pussy so full. I kid you not, I would do it over and over again just to see the look on her face.”
Not a dry eye in his audience. You hold your hand over your mouth in shock, Mingyu’s howling like the moon had just come out, and even Wonwoo was stunned at such an obscene statement, blinking into the distance like he’s in The Office. Seungcheol, filled with pride, picks himself off from the ground and dusts any dirt off. “I’ll be back. Too much beer. No one kill anybody.”
He ambles off to the restroom, closing the door behind him.
“Ah,” Wonwoo claps his sweater paws together, “there’s a game I was waiting to buy. I still have some time before then. Need to be first in line.”
He hurriedly gets up from the floor and rushes to his room, “I’ll be back! 20–30 minutes tops!”
You two are left alone and awkward silence fills the air. Things were never really the same since your relationship ended, but things weren’t ever really it when you were together either.
“Foursome huh?” You ponder. “Didn’t seem like his kind of activity but if he enjoys it.”
Mingyu scoffs, ready to start smth again. “What? Jealous he’s getting more action than you?”
“Not jealous, just worried. How can a human body take that much cock and still walk around all normally? Happy birthday to them,” you snicker.
“Don’t worry, you won’t have to worry about that many dicks wanting to be inside you.”
You glare at him, your teeth grinding behind your fake smile. “You sure talk a lot for someone as bitchless as you are.”
“Excuse you, I am fucking stacked with pussy right now, speak when you have your facts right, ‘mmkay?”
You let out a curt guffaw, “Please, you are so fucking lucky you had me when you did. No damn way in hell you could’ve gotten laid without me.”
Mingyu slouches, drawing his jaw open. “Wow. I get it now”
“Get what? How big of a loser you are?”
He shakes his head. “No...You miss my dick so bad.”
You make a show of yourself laughing, even physically doubling over. “In your fucking dreams, you human pandemic.”
“Admit it. You miss our sex. It’s why you’re such a fucking a bitch to me. To throw my game off.”
“Oh honey, you don’t need my help doing that.”
“Please! You got this territorial thing because we were each other’s first. You’re obsessed with me. I see that now.”
“Right, you’re drunk,” you pick yourself up from the ground this time and saunter off to the kitchen, “I couldn’t care less about who you sleep with. As long as it doesn’t involve me.”
“You’re such a liar,” he insults as he gets up to follow.
He positions himself by your side as you distract yourself in the kitchen, mindlessly looking for, well, anything. Why was every cupboard empty? You really have to remember to go grocery shopping with Wonwoo later.
“Am not,” You insist, no finding haven in the fridge, which also happened to be barren of things except half a dozen eggs, a carton of milk, and for some reason a box of m&ms.
“You can’t even look me in the eyes right now. Say it while looking at me.”
You scoff without looking, “I don’t have to prove myself.”
“Why? Because you can’t? Admit it.” His hand trails over your backside as you stall at the fridge, trailing underneath your shirt and sending chills.
You can practically count his breaths as his lips ghost over your ears, smiling against your skin. You almost let out a gasp at the close proximity of his hips pressed into your back, your heartbeat heightening, but immediately close your mouth shut, not giving him the satisfaction. That didn’t bother him though, your body language was enough. You were frozen under pressure, unable to fight back, let alone talk back, similar to how you used to get in the past only minutes before he gets you cum like the mess you were. 
His hand slides over your bare stomach, feeling you tense it up as a result. “You loved when I ate out your dirty little pussy. You begged for it. Remember?”
You shudder at his touch, gripping the handle of the fridge for safety, “Mingyu—“
“Don’t think I forgot how you moaned my name either,” he finds the top button of your pants with ease, unbuttoning it and pulling the metal zipper down, “Tell me to stop. Otherwise, I’ll just keep going.”
When you grow silent, he takes it as a sign to keep going. He presses his lips to the back of your ear, hand falling to your thigh and cupping over your clothed cunt. You dip into the fridge’s cold, taming the heat in your body, while Mingyu makes that difficult to resist. Your back arch, fitting seamlessly to Mingyu’s figure, soft, yet desperate, sighs escaping from your lips.
“Mingyu please…”
“Mmh, just like that…” he nibbles against your ear, slowly and cautiously he sinks his hand down your pants and finds your arousal, a thin film of it already coating his fingers, “your voice was pretty just like that. Whining about how you need my dick inside of you or begging to let you cum on my fingers. You were such a sweet little slut for me. Tell me you don’t miss that.”
You’re shaking so much, you could feel your legs seconds away from giving out. You shut the refrigerator close and turn to face him, leveraging yourself against the appliance’s cool exterior. He pins himself against you, sliding his digits between your slit, making contact with the clit, and pinching it between his thumb and index. You can’t help but crack a small moan, only loud enough for him to hear, and he just chuckles. “There you are. Old habits die hard don’t they?”
He does his best in reminding you of the old times, even rubbing your pussy how he used to, getting your sweat pilling on your forehead, or your voice getting raspy as if you were left to die in a desert. Fuck him for still having that effect on you. 
“Please…you’ll get us caught.” You plead weakly.
“You say that like you actually want us to get caught.”
He pulls out his fingers from your pants, sticking them in his mouth before sucking your juices from them. You watch in a hypnotized state, mouth gaping in envy, desperate to have his lips wrapped around you, your lips, your cunt, anywhere as long as it's your body. “Sweet. Just like how I remember.”
You gulp hard, staring back into his carnal gaze, and observe as he slowly pulls out his fingers and rests them against your cheek, parting your lips back with his thumb. 
“Am I interrupting something?”
As an impulse, you push Mingyu several feet away from you, hiding your undone pants behind a kitchen counter. The taller man can’t help but suppress his boisterous laughter threatening to seep out and only glances back at his friend’s sudden appearance in amusement, feeling like the victor in the situation. Meanwhile, you made yourself physically small, tucking away in the corner of the kitchen where he can’t see you panic while fixing your pants but inevitably fail. “S-Seungcheol.”
Mingyu lets his smugness show. “I don’t know. Is he, Y/n? Is he interrupting something?”
“No, of course not. Just caught me a…rough spot.”
Seungcheol rolls his eyes. “Look, if you guys are going to have sex and get back together. No one is stopping you.”
“Excuse me,” you feel rather insulted at his assumption, it was condescending entirely.
“Come on, it was bound to happen eventually. Save us, the tittering and whatever.”
You push past Mingyu to walk straight to Seungcheol, shoving his heavy build. “What I do with my body and my life is not up to Mingyu or you, Choi Seungcheol. Fuck you.”
He leers down at you. “Don’t get mad at me because you know I’m right, you brat.”
“Oh, because you fuck with a few extra people, you think you know everything, don’t you?”
“More than your ‘only Mingyu having ass’,” he taunts.
If Mingyu was the ex, and Wonwoo’s the innocent bystander, Seungcheol, in your case, was a shit stirrer. He pushes your buttons about the same as Mingyu some of the time. He was supposed to be your closest friend, your longest friend. Somewhere that had changed. You used to tell each other everything and now he was getting into threesomes? 
“Yeah?”
“Yeah.”
“Well, fuck you.” You push him back onto the couch behind him, having him collapse seamlessly against it before you’re straddling him.
Your lips latch onto him assertively, tugging and, no doubt, stretching his plain tee. If Seungcheol minded, he didn't seem to show it, and instead kisses you back, matching your aggression. Although initially startled, it doesn’t take him long to adjust to your pace. He handles your body as if he belongs to him, gripping you by the back of your neck as his other hand tucks around the shape of your ass, firmly squeezing it.
“You’re so, mmh, f-frustrating sometimes.” You manage to comment between your moans.
He snickers under his breath, hand running through your hair and pulling at its strands, tugging your head back, “And you can be a real bitch.”
Your blossoming attraction for him only made it all the more frustrating. You always did notice that he behaves a more particular way around you over the past few years. Somewhere between distant and insensitive. Whatever it was, you were gonna take it out on him, and maybe that’s what he wanted.
Scoffing, you grind against his bulge, harshly brushing it against your cunt. “I’ll show you a bitch.”
He grunts beneath your efforts, quickly returning your offense. His hands travel underneath your shirt, pressing into your flesh. His teeth bite down, pulling on your bottom lip, and you can sweet his smile as he does it. He thrusts up into you, rocking back at your core, waiting to fill out what you’ve been dying to entrust him with. The thought itself made you wet (as if you weren’t already from that little incident with Mingyu).
The man that previously had been watched was now the one watching. It was all face paced but it was like he watching in slow motion. He observes the placement of Seungcheol’s hands, and how they grabbed you possessively, even hearing the growl under the elder’s breath. Your moans grow louder when the man’s lips are suctioned around your neck, your nails noticeably digging as his hands slide lower to feel the bare ass beneath your jeans.
Mingyu sucks in his breath, repositioning the spot in his jeans. He impulsively licks his licks, unable to look away. “Didn’t expect that.”
“Me neither.”
Startled, Mingyu cups his erection as his eyes shoot up alert, finally noticing his four-eyed friend has emerged from his bedroom without so much as making a single wood board squeak. “The fuck? Did you come back from the shadow realm?”
Wonwoo shrugs nonchalantly. “The deed is done, and this is a thing now, I guess.”
Wonwoo just how Mingyu felt about you over the years despite the flaming misalignments with your personalities. He couldn’t imagine the thoughts running in his best friend's head right now.
He turns Mingyu in concern, seeing the man’s eyes glisten in the scene's direction. “You okay?”
Was he? He’s looking at one of his best friends furiously getting it on with his ex, neither of them giving a damn who watches and he should be furious. He should be enraged. He should be at least bothered by what’s happening, but no. Only one thing was furious.
“No,” Mingyu answers, “I’m horny.”
He leaves Wonwoo’s company to join you and Seungcheol on the couch, immediately taking your head back in a hungry kiss as Seungcheol finds solace back on your neck, finding weak weak points in mere seconds, and you can’t help but moan in Mingyu’s liplock. Wonwoo is at first confused about what to do, only able to watch at first until his curiosity piques.
In the midst of his observation, you’ve gone pantless, quickly followed by Seungcheol and Mingyu, and has quickly adjusted to double the attention. Seungcheol manages to pull out a few spare condoms from his wallet all too conveniently, handing one off to Mingyu, who was ready to whip his angry erection out any second. He then lays his eyes on Wonwoo, staring off in his direction, still suckling on your neck. He gestures to him to take the extra condom, nonverbally inviting him into the spontaneous mix.
The bystander hesitates, staring back at the silver wrapper as if it was a foreign object, unsure if he was really offered to join or had this situation become a common courtesy for a latecomer such as him.
“Take the condom, Woo. You’re gonna need it with what we’re about to do,” Seughcheol ushers against your flaming skin.
Wonwoo inches closer in baby steps, hand stretching out and grasping the plastic, and at the same time, you pull away from either man from the couch, turning your whole attention to Wonwoo. You grab him by his collar and smash against his lips. It’s strange, almost wrong at most, you were already occupying someone else’s lap, but in a strange way, empowering. His hand crawls up the side of your face to deepen the kiss, feeling your tongue explore his mouth just as you did the other two, while they were only able to watch. 
Exhibitionism, let alone orgy, was never on his bingo card. Sex for him wasn’t even that regular an occurrence for him, but he could see now the taste of what Seungcheol was talking about. There was something satisfyingly carnal about sharing someone. You play into their hands as if your life depended on it, but felt all that same arousal anyone else in that group did.
With that thought in mind, it invoked something in Wonwoo. Shivers ran down his spine the moment your hand goes to cup the bulge of his track pants, feeling him grow bigger in size when you slip past the waistband and slid beneath his briefs. His eyes fluttered at the soft sensation of your fingertips, teasing the precum squeezing out of the head.
“You feel so big, Woo,” you gasp out as your grasp travels down his length, “let me suck on it, please.”
The man shifts in his seat, delirious to the point of being mute, only able to nod triumphantly as you begin tugging the pants and underwear off, collecting the fabric at his ankles.
“Princess,” Seungcheol beckons, “why don’t you lay your stomach on my lap to get closer to Wonwoo’s cock.”
You nod obediently, satisfied with your new pet name, getting off of Seungcheol’s lap to place yourself back on again, this time your ass in view for Seungcheol and Mingyu to appreciate. Mingyu’s teeth catch his bottom lip, groping himself through his briefs. “Fuck.”
He can’t help but land a full-handed spank against your cheek, causing you to flinch after your grip wrapped around the base of Wonwoo’s cock and he feels a tight squeeze around his girth and he throws back his head from the sensitivity, “Gyu, for god’s sake.”
“Sorry, dude, couldn’t help myself,” the younger man chuckles, “but she likes that. You like all our attention on you, don’t you?”
You let out a light chuckle, a smug grin stretching over your face. “Yes, yes I do.”
Seungcheol couldn’t help fixating on your ass pulling your waistband down to the curve and sliding a dry finger up your wet slit, groaning at simply how gloriously wet you were. “Shit. You’re fucking soaked. You can take my fingers right, princess?”
“Mmh, yes, Cheol. Give it to me…”
As you’re spitting into your hand, stroking handfuls of Wonwoo in your hand, you can feel Seungcheol fitting two digits in your moisture and hooking them in place. He goes easy on you, mildly prepping you, while you drop your head and wrap your lips around the tip of Wonwoo’s length, swirling circles on to lap up the bit of his precum, your soft giggles vibrating against the spectacled man.
His gaze softens at you, petting your hair and caressing your cheek. “So…pretty…”
“Thank you,” you reply, taking half his size in your mouth, and feel how he hugs your cheeks.
Wonwoo lets outs hushed whimpers, exhaling out of his nose, his fingers impulsively finger through your hair and take grip. Through his shut eyes, he can feel the nodding of your head, the vigor of your tongue, and finally the head of his cock hitting your uvula, bobbing back and forth. “S-shit, like that, yeah…”
He can feel himself physically shuddering, glancing back at the lure of your eyes as your mouth collects every inch, every vein, and moan that escapes his lips. His hand guides you, pushing you deeper around his cock and the sounds of your efforts were euphoric, especially how they were followed by Seungcheol’s work, who found himself slamming his fingers back into you like a jackhammer. You slightly jump, vibrating around Wonwoo as you cried out obscenities.
“Mmph, more, please,” you beg, bringing a smile to both Seungcheol and Mingyu’s faces.
Seungcheol used another hand to give spanks on either one of your cheeks, playing with you like a set of drums. They get tender in his grasp, making them more fun to squeeze and there’s that pleasant way your backside jerks towards him, knowing he’s doing everything right.
It was then Mingyu had an idea. While his other friends handled you their way, he had no choice but to find his own choice of sport. He pulls himself up from the couch, excited to spring back into action, and goes on to grab something from your room. He disappears as quickly as he returns, a familiar transparent squeeze bottle in his hand. He goes on a knee to your side, squeezing the cold sticky substance on your unpreoccupied hole, squirting circles around your quivering rim.
“Remember when you thought we wouldn’t use this again? Looks like now’s the time. Are you ready for that?” He asks with a Cheshire smile as he closes the cap and puts the bottle aside.
You moan a confirmation, nodding your head complacently. His chuckles are sickly sweet as he draws his lips close to your ear, teasing his digit from entering. The moment it enters you mentally prepare yourself for the sensation, know damn well you could never get used to that. Mingyu groans at how you swallow his middle digit as he churns it inside you, another hand coming against your tender cheeks. “Fucking slut. Like us filling all your holes, hmm?”
There is no way you can physically answer as you feel yourself gag as you reach your limit with Wonwoo, who at this point doesn’t hear others and uses your mouth with only the thought of getting off down your throat. You finally croak out a yes before two of Wonwoo’s hands grip your head and slam you down the base when you least expected him to. Tears run down your eyes, your cheeks hot, feeling yourself suffocated, you dig your nails into Wonwoo’s thighs, white crescents appearing on his skin. 
He groans long and loud, jerking his hips as he’s dumping some of his load down your throat but pulls out from the overstimulation, having the rest shoot on your face. The translucent thick ribbons stain your cheeks and drip off your chin down to his thigh. Red face and a hot sweat beading from his forehead. Wonwoo finally collects himself enough to look back at you apologetically, visibly embarrassed.
“I’m so, so sorry, Y/n.”
Instead of letting him feel sorry for himself and you, you take Wonwoo’s hand and use it like a napkin, swiping his cum on his fingers. He’s stunned when he sees it, a quarry of your actions stuck and stopped at his throat until you take that hand and enter it in your mouth, your tongue catching his release. The man’s abdomen tense, letting your hand suck his fingers off clean and you hold them in there, filling your mouth with another body part of Wonwoo that day.
“Goddamnit, Y/n. You really can’t help yourself.” He comments blatantly lost in awe.
Your body curled up in Seungcheol’s lap helplessly, trembling, slick moisture seeping out of you at their mercy. The others can hear the anguish in your muffled voice, how close you get with fingers thrust inside you with only every passing second, only to have that ecstasy slip away as their fingers pull out. You whine in retaliation, their collective chuckles mocking you, even Wonwoo couldn’t help but find the scene amusing. 
“Can’t have you cum that quickly, can we?” Seungcheol taunts.
He roughly tugs up your body until your back is toward his chest, feeling your perspiration against his torso. He shrugs off his briefs and your underwear is quick to follow, the tips of his fingers now rubbing your arousal all around your entrance, adding the slick substance to your already lubed up rim. You mewl at his fingers, your hands gripping against his forearm but lacking the willpower to have an effect. His teeth graze your eye, pulling you by the cartilage. “We’re gonna fill you out so nice, you’ll beg for more…perfect little holes for us to use…tell us what you want, princess.”
You let out a shallow breath, “I want…to feel full. I want you inside me.”
His hand lands on his cock, hard and naturally aligned at your rim, before testing Mingyu's prep work, “Good girl…feeling so perfectly tight…”
Seungcheol can’t forget how it closed around him while he takes a long gradual stroke inside. He groans loudly, filling you until your moans give out. His hands plant against the backside of your thighs to lift them and fold them against you, pushing his length in. Your eyes rapidly shake, the white of them visibly, and you welcome Seungcheol’s cock with his name on your tongue. “F-fuck yes…more Seungcheol…”
Wonwon doesn’t know what gets over him when he finds himself staring back at your glistening folds, looking at your pulsing clit like it was the last m&m. His flaccid cock now twitching upright in his lap, he licks his lips, not taking his eyes away from you. “Seungcheol spread her legs out more.”
The elder man gave a knowing smile and did as requested, and your pussy stretches open, your clit more evident than before. Soon Wonwoo has mustered the strength to put his face up to your entrance and suck on the bulging nub like a straw, watching your toes curling as soon as he does. You can feel his subtle smiles against your arousal, the curve of it pulling at your folds.
“Shit,” you whisper, throwing your head back against Seungcheol’s shoulder, panting against the man’s cheek.
“Feels good, doesn’t it?” Seungcheol teases, “You haven’t gotten enough just yet.”
Mingyu gets up from where he sits, stroking his cock in his hand. He comes to your side, the tip of his length angles at your lips, and you look up at him in anticipation. He mocks you, tapping himself against your lips. “Beg for it. Go on. Whore.”
You sigh defeatedly, “Please, Mingyu…I need your cock in my mouth…”
“Isn’t that nice? You can shut up.” He chuckles to himself.
He takes hold of your head, prodding your lips apart with the head of his cock inside, and sees how easily it slides in your mouth. You moan around his girth, as the jerk of his hips pushed himself deeper inside you. It's almost how fast it happens just as you don’t remember how it began. All you knew was it felt amazing nothing like you ever felt. You never knew you could want this–no, you never knew how much you needed this.
“Want to fuck you, Y/n? Can I?” Wonwoo asks politely against your core.
You nod with your mouth full, coughing out Mingyu’s cock given the opportunity. “Yes, Wonwoo, I want you…I want all of you…please fuck me full…”
Saying that out loud was enough of a motive to flip the script. Seungcheol, still inside, lays flat against the couch, head propped against the couch arm. Wonwoo gives Mingyu a knowing look, letting his friend go first. Mingyu scoffs, “I’m coming for you, Y/n.”
“Not yet, you are,” You retort.
“And you said I’d never get be inside you again. Things can happen.”
Mingyu lets his cock slip around your arousal before he’s reunited with your fluttering walls, a nostalgic hum leaving his lips. “Fuck, that’s good.”
“Mingyu—You both—ah fuck, feels so g-good…”
Mingyu and Seungcheol carry a mismatched pace, their uneven breaths fill the air as you take it, take them. Your voice sounds of agony but rather the opposite, you couldn’t feel more bliss. Wonwoo mentally and physically readies himself, his cock almost back to full power. He joins the party when he feels the fire in him, thanking himself for getting a big enough couch, and hovering on top of you.
You hadn’t noticed it before but something was missing from the man joining, and not his clothing. “Your g-glasses…”
“Ah,” he smiles, “put them aside, didn’t want them to break.”
“Hmm, it’s n-nice looking you in the e-eyes for o-once.”
“I’ll make sure to make it happen more often…Tell me if I’m hurting you. If any of us do.”
You hum a yes, finding his lips reattach to yours soon after. Wonwoo gives himself one last stroke before its mere centimeters away from Mingyu’s, finding the right angle to join his friend. It’s not an easy feat sharing space, but he finds a way, pushing through to stretch you wide and open, collective moans coming from all ends.
“Holy shit,” you screech, “so many c-cocks…”
“You’re taking us so too, Princess. I knew you could do it,” Seungcheol exclaims.
Mingyu was getting a thrill out of this, “Of course she can, Y/n is a bigger dirty slut than she makes herself out to be. She enjoys it, hmm? Say it.”
“I en—love it. I love the cocks in me so much…”
“Shit, you’re so pretty for that,” Wonwoo claims on your neck, pounding now faster, “say that again for us please.”
“I love your cocks fucking me…fucking my pussy and ass…”
Mingyu missed how you gave your everything during sex, groaning louder and louder the tighter you try to clench, how closer he realizes he’s getting. “She’ll say anything to cum…don’t let her.”
Mingyu’s hand comes up from behind Wonwoo to slap your clit, pinching to hear you whine. “You cum too soon, we’ll just fuck you over and over again. I want white to cover every inch of your body, clear?”
“Y-yes…sir…”
“Perfect little whore.”
You feel the rutting in and out of you like clockwork, overwhelmed by all the different energies your body accepts. Your moans, your screams, or your tears could never tell the full story of the euphoria of your feeling. Your arms embrace Wonwoo, latching on his hair and face, kissing him on his swollen lips, and feeling hot to the point you could confuse it for inferno, or that you were part of inferno yourself.
Seungcheol swallows back his drool, blind in ecstasy flowing through him and now reaching up to the surface. His fingers dig deeper into your thighs and the sounds of skin slapping drown out his moans. Seungcheol clutches you against him as he whispers, “you okay with me cumming in your ass princess, hmm, is that what you want?”
“Yes,” You answer in a hushed tone, “please I want you to cum in my ass…”
You feel his relieved sighs on your neck, slamming his body into you harder. You’re stretched like elastic, wearing down at their rough touch, until Seungcheol does as promised, squeezing his load and shooting it up in gradually staggering pumps until he’s empty and drops his rubber covered cock out to drip back onto the fabric of the couch.
That had been your final straw, feeling your climax erupt only immediately after Seungcheol. “I’m cumming, I’m cumming, I’m cumming…”
Wonwoo kisses your cheek in response but doesn’t stop. Mingyu on the other hand slaps against your clit harder repeatedly, reveling in the wretched noise you make. “Cum all you want…we'll take it…like you’re gonna keep taking us.”
Wonwoo grunts alone by himself, Holding you against him like it's the last, helping Mingyu keep his word and fuck you senseless. He was a good friend, he was good at helping his friends. That friendly nature makes you weak to the sensitivity after, whining under their touch, shaking on top of Seungcheol, as he tenderly fondles your breasts in his rest. It feels endless, not like you’re complaining, but a somewhat bit of relief is obvious when both of the remaining men cum in you simultaneously.  Friends that cum together, stay together, you guess.
“You gonna take our cum?” Mingyu pokes, his cock ruts in you like a man with no control.
“Y-yes.” You choke out.
“Yes, what?”
“Yes, yes, I can take your cum, please. Please. Cum in my pussy, I need your loads in me.”
“Wait condoms? You guys aren’t wearing any?” Seungcheol voiced out.
Wonwoo shakes his head as Mingyu aguishly blurts out a “no.”
“Aw, fuck you guys.”
“Mmp, mmph,” that was the sound of Wonwoo biting into your shoulder, his sweet white dispersing into you perfectly with Mingyu to follow. Ther loads meshed well together like they do, becoming one with your climax, dripping out of your brim like oozing honey: sweet, creamy, sticky. The perfect symphony to showcase the perfect vessel, capable of catching their cum.
“Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit—”
Mingyu moans out his climax just as you remember, just as voluminous and rich. He’d laugh if he knew how much you would think about hearing it again. Your tired bodies part from each other, panting loudly inches away from each other, staring mindlessly into the space in front of them. You were the particularly spent and Wonwoo, the first to notice and care, picks up by your knees and carries you, fulfilling his duties as your designated roommate. “You’re okay, right?”
“Mm, I’m good, Woo.” you softly respond in his arms, you turn to the other two men fatigued on the couch, “I’m taking a shower first, assholes. Only Wonwoo can join.”
Wonwoo smiles with a blush on his cheeks, while the others roll their eyes.
“What? Why only Wonwoo?” Seungcheol questions.
“He treated me nicer. Think about it the next time we all fuck.”
Wonwoo looks back at you with a surprised look before taking you away to the bathroom. You leave Mingyu and Seungcheol to look back at each other, pondering on your response, taking all the world, space, and time to process your words.
Simultaneously. “Next time?”
4K notes · View notes
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as the flowers bloom, my heart does too ⋆*·゚misa rodriguez x putellas!femreader, social media au, (15/-)
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when your relationship ends and all you want to do is hide and cry, flowers suddenly start to appear on your doorstep.
or; misa hating to see a pretty girl cry and suffer and going out of her way to cheer her up while staying anonymous
fic: see my masterlist
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tagged: bff3 1,103 likes yourusername: this week was a lot of ☕️👶🥐🐕's.
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bff3 If only he is as peaceful like that during the nights 😅😂 ↳ yourusername girl no, he wailed the entire time we were at the cafe 😚 ↳ bff2 Soooo, do you still want a baby? Because somehow I just know yours would be worse 🤣 ↳ yourusername no i've already got @/bff1 to look after ↳ bff1 goo goo gah gah
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↳ 8h ago: marisabel_rguez added to their story ↳ 8h ago: marisabel_rguez added to their story ↳ 8h ago: marisabel_rguez added to their story
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tagged: marisabel_rguez 1,284 likes yourusername: thank you for the sun this week, madrid 🌞
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alexiaputellas Does Misa think it's 38 degrees celcius outside? ↳ yourusername "we paid for the backyard, so i'm going to sit in the backyard. weather or no weather." ↳ marisabel_rguez No, but I was manifesting 38 degrees celcius 😌 ↳ alexiaputellas Of course, you would. A goalie doesn't have to run in that heat 🤨
marialeonn16 Barcelona's had sun all month long, just saying... 👀 liked by yourusername ↳ yourusername thanks for the suggestion 🤔
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tagged: alexiaputellas, bff1, bff2, bff3, albaps9 4,395 likes yourusername: barcelona for the weekend 🖤
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bff1 um hi, why did i just find out you took all the photos with you back home? ↳ yourusername on accident!!! i promise i'll send 'em soon <3 ↳ bff2 How about you come give them yourself? We miss you already 😭 ↳ bff3 The distance thing isn't getting easier by time, is it? 😪
alexiaputellas Hermanita 😘
albaps9 i love you, bitch!
marisabel_rguez Come back!!! 🥺
marisabel_rguez My woman 😍
ingridengen had the sweetest time <3
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tagged: yourusername, albaputellas, bff3 16,833 likes marisabel_rguez: Contento 🧡
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bff1 misa, attracting kitties wherever she goes since 1999 ↳ yourusername especially the one in the fourth slide 🤭 ↳ marisabel_rguez Atrapadaaa 😎
sofie.svava 😇
albaps9 Always fun thirdwheeling with you two 🧡
alexiaputellas I feel left out from that last photo 🤨 ↳ albaps9 dw you didn't miss a thing beside heart eyes, pda and inside jokes
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tagged: bff2 1,839 likes yourusername: celebrating bestie's 28th!!
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bff2 Oh, I see, stealing my man, aren't you? ↳ yourusername yes omg you got me, forgive me 😭 ↳ bff1 oh please, he wouldn't know what to do with all that sass and chaos 🤣 ↳ marisabel_rguez Yeah, it's not for the faint hearted... ↳ yourusername 😳 ↳ marisabel_rguez 🤫 ↳ yourusername 😏 ↳ marisabel_rguez 😉 ↳ bff1 mom, they're flirting in the comments again @/albaps9 ↳ albaps9 i'm not your fucking mom ew ↳ bff1 but you can be my mami 😏 ↳ albaps9 not in your wildest dreams ↳ bff1 so umm, real life is still on the table? ↳ albaps9 SHOO 😡 ↳ yourusername hey tbh, i'd rather have you as my sis in law than as my deranged cousin @/bff1 ↳ bff1 ooooh and we already know i'd be the first gf alba brings home that eli will actually like ↳ yourusername 🤣🤣🤣🤣 ↳ albaps9 😑
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tagged: marisabel_rguez 33,956 likes realmadridfem: 🧤 1️⃣0️⃣0️⃣ 🧤💫 ¡A por otros cien! 💚
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yourusername eso!!! epa!!! viva!!! proud!! 😍
alexiaputellas 👏
bff3 Congrats!!
bff1 hurra! here's to a 10000000 more! 😉 ↳ yourusername hey, no, i'd actually like to have some time with her as well ↳ bff1 right right, my bad
bff2 Yes, Misa! 💗
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tagged: marisabel_rguez 2,498 likes yourusername: hehe 😁😁😁
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albaps9 ffs you're too smitten and making me feel single again ↳ yourusername hey i hid the fluff in the other slides so that means you shouldn't have swiped ↳ albaps9 excuse me for being interested in what my baby sis has been doing lately. but i guess now i know🙃
sofie.svava !!favourite couple alert!!
marisabel_rguez 😘
begovargas cute!
leilaouahabi 😍
bff3 🥺💗
salmaparalluelo amigas 🥺
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↳ 5min ago: marisabel_rguez added to their close friends story
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↳ 21min ago: yourusername added to their story
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tagged: marisabel_rguez 12,352 likes realmadridfem: ✨ #Misa2026 ✨
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marisabel_rguez 🤩💙
yourusername oh thank god, bc the mortgage on our madrid home isn't paid off yet and the paint on our walls has only just dried 😭 170 likes ↳ albaps9 misa rn: i beg you don't embarrass me, motherfucker ahhh 😗 ↳ alexiaputellas 'Madrid home', you phrase it as if you have other properties 😂 ↳ yourusername stop making fun of me ↳ marisabel_rguez 😂😘
yourusername 💙🤍
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Text Messages
you - hey, just wanted to give you both a quick heads up that misa and i are going camping this weekend. probably won’t have data or service, so pls don’t get worried when we don’t answer! i'll text as soon as i can again!
ale 🐻 - YN, you can't just go somewhere with no service or data, what if something happens?
albaquerque 🌼 - que??? you’re not build for the wilderness??? why do you think this is a good idea, yn?
you - i'll have misa there! 😊
albaquerque 🌼 - girl she's no bear grylls
you - jesus, we're not going to the middle of the amazon, alba
ale 🐻 - You do know there are no bathrooms, right? You'll have to find a tree or something
albaquerque 🌼 - a TREE? do you think she's a dog? just squat behind a bush and hope a snake doesn't bite you in the 🍑
albaquerque 🌼 - also, was this misa's idea because i can't see you actually coming up with this yourself lol
you - yea she has a bucketlist 🤷‍♀️and i am more than willing to help her cross some things off 🤷‍♀️
albaquerque 🌼 - 👀
albaquerque 🌼 - this is a sexual thing again, isn't it?
ale 🐻 - Oh dios mio, here we go
ale 🐻 - I'm going to walk the dog
albaquerque 🌼 - ??? you don't have a dog anymore so you can't use that excuse this time (rest in peace, nala la mala)
ale 🐻 - Thanks for reminding me 🖕
you - WE'RE LEAVING BYE
ale 🐻 - Bring bug spray, actual flashlights that run on batteries and not your phone, some extra water and snacks and good shoes for any terrain. And sunscreen!! And a first aid kit, do you have one of those?
ale 🐻 - Wait, do you guys even know how to set up a tent?
ale 🐻 - Oh and do you know the general area of where you'll be camping? Can you drop a pin of your location?
albaquerque 🌼 - all i'll say is, have safe sex and watch out for cannibals xoxo
you - GOTTA RUN I LOVE YOU BOTH
you - 📍location shared
ale 🐻 - My intuition is saying she'll be begging Misa to drive her back home the second she hears a creepy sound outside of the tent or sees the first best insect.
albaquerque 🌼 - begging...hm 👀
ale 🐻 - read
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↳ 1h ago: yourusername added to their story
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↳ 55min ago: marisabel_rguez added to their story
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tagged: marisabel_rguez 3,281 likes yourusername: 🏕👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩
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bff1 i'm sorry, who is this and what did you do to my bestie? bugs and no proper bathrooms? YN would NEVER ↳ albaps9 exactly what i said 🤣 ↳ marisabel_rguez What can I say, I'm a good influence! ↳ bff1 ooooh ok i bet, what incentive did you use? 👀 ↳ yourusername she just asked nicely 😚
marisabel_rguez 😊
bff3 Yay! See, I told you you'd survive!
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tagged: yourusername 12,130 likes marisabel_rguez: Proud of my city girl for conquering the wild 🤪 (Let's not mention the insects, bruised thumb, creepy man and having to move to the safety of the car in the middle of the last night)
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alexiaputellas Creepy man??? You have some explaining to do 🙃
yourusername my knightess in shining armour 😚
yourusername and we survived one of the ultimate relationship tests: setting up a tent together without practice 🤝
bff1 you should've known better than to let yn hammer the tent pegs into the ground 🤣 ↳ yourusername now i've got an ouchie 😔 ↳ marisabel_rguez I'll kiss it better later ☹️
albaps9 i have to admit, i didn't think you'd actually go through with it 😆
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↳ 28min ago: yourusername added to their story ↳ 2min ago: yourusername added to their story
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tagged: yourusername 16,014 likes marisabel_rguez: Getting handsy! Y/N picked up a new hobby so, naturally, I picked up a new hobby too.
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yourusername getting some practice in! 😀☺️ ↳ marisabel_rguez Are you saying I needed it? ↳ yourusername noooo but i can't have you go rusty now, can i? ↳ alexiaputellas 🚪🚶‍♀️
alexiaputellas That explains all the crooked pottery at mami's 😛 ↳ yourusername ok rude, you won't be getting one for your birthday ↳ albaps9 somehow i doubt ale's mad about that one ↳ yourusername and you won't either 😠
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tagged: yourusername 12,014 likes marisabel_rguez: How did I ever baguette you? 👜🥖🤩
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alexiaputellas I don't understand this one ↳ bff1 yea me neither ↳ marisabel_rguez Baguette about it 🙄
username1 yn pls realise how lucky you are 🥺🥺 liked by yourusername and 102 others
username3 brushing up on your french duolingo, i see? ↳ username2 Olympics incoming!!!
yourusername bc you're dough-tally awesome!! 😘 67 likes ↳ marisabel_rguez 😊
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↳ 7h ago: yourusername added to their story
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tagged: marisabel_rguez 7,039 likes yourusername: 2024 olympics: she's ready, here she comes!
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username1 will our favourite wag tag along? ↳ yourusername but of course 😌 89 likes
jennihermoso We'll keep an eye on her, don't worry 😎 ↳ yourusername i don't know if that should make me worry more tho 🤣 liked by alexiaputellas
username2 yn can i have your woman? ↳ yourusername no 😱 52 likes
haleyraso go kick some ass!! so long as it won't be against us <3
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13,131 likes yourusername: paris olympics ft olga <3 ☕️🇫🇷💋
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alexiaputellas ❤️
albaps9 did you two end up going to the louvre and pretend you know a single thing about art? ↳ yourusername 🤫
bff2 Did you go to that cafe we couldn't get to last time?? ↳ yourusername noooo it was so crowded! biggest regret!! ↳ bff1 oh no! looks like you'll have to go again and then, idk, maybe bring me along this time? ↳ bff2 We'd lose you the second we step foot on the Champs Elysees 👜🛍💍
marisabel_rguez baby 😍
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↳ 5min ago: marisabel_rguez added to their story
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↳ 2h ago: yourusername added to their story
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↳ 1h ago: yourusername added to their story
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↳ 55min ago: marisabel_rguez added to their story
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tagged: marisabel_rguez 17,739 likes yourusername: three years ago we officially got together in italy. now we're celebrating three years full of love in france. here's to a thousand more adventures and years with you, my love.
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albaps9 you really thought you were being slick back then on that italy trip, hm? 🤣 ↳ yourusername secretly we were having a bet on who would figure it out first 😉 ↳ albaps9 shitheads!!! but i won, didn't i? ↳ marisabel_rguez Nope, Elí did!! ↳ albaps9 of course mami did 🙄 ↳ alexiaputellas And I definitely came last for the first time in my life thanks to you two idiots🖕 ↳ yourusername but not for lack of trying 😭 ↳ username1 WHAT ABOUT ALL OF US THO? 🥇??!! 31 likes
alexiaputellas Happy 33 years 😊 ↳ yourusername 33?? excuse ME 😱 ↳ alexiaputellas Oh, typo! I meant 3, but you'll get there eventually! 😘 ↳ marisabel_rguez 30 years will fly by before we know it, but I kind of don't want time to pass that fast yet! ↳ yourusername me neither, i can't wait to see what's next, but i also can't wait to grow old with you 🥺 
bff3 That green sweater's been through some stuff 😆
bff1 you're breaking your feed aesthetic? damn she must really like you @/marisabel_rguez ↳ yourusername ahum!!! 😡 *LOVE!!! I LOVE LOVE LOVE HER
marisabel_rguez You're the best thing to have ever happened to me. I treasure what we have and I love love love you too 😘
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tagged: yourusername 21,014 likes marisabel_rguez: Celebrating three years in love with my love in the city of love 😍
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albaps9 that's a lot of love, do you think they're in love? liked by marisabel_rguez
username1 no way has it already been three years ↳ username2 BUT AREN'T WE GLAD THAT IT HAS? 🎉
yourusername te amo con todo mi corazón, la vida estaría vacía sin ti. soy tuya 😚 liked by marisabel_rguez ↳ marisabel_rguez No puedo vivir sin ti.
bff1 someone will be eating good tonight ↳ alexiaputellas Please no ↳ bff1 get your head out of the gutter ale, they're literally fine dining with the eiffel tower in the background, that's top cuisine 💸🤑
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a/n: a very fluffy chapter. hope you liked it. sending all my best to you, hope your weekend will be wonderful. (and exciting stuff will be coming in part 16!) 💋
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jadeylovesmarvelxo · 11 months
Text
💕
Fluffy one shot 💖💫
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Eddie hates mistletoe. It reminds him of last year when he was stuck under the offending plant for five minutes with one of those idiot jocks from Jason's squad.
"Come on big boy, give us a kiss" he batted his eyelashes at the dude who finally stormed away muttering the usual insults under his breath.
Then there was the time Tammy Thompson who caught him under it two years ago and kissed him. It was in front of Hellfire and they didn't let him live it down for weeks.
So now he avoided mistletoe like the plague, who's stupid idea was it to hang it up in the school anyway?
He had seen two of his teachers sharing a kiss and that was enough to give him nightmares for a week.
Anytime he saw mistletoe now he would make a run for it, avoided going anywhere near places he knew it would be.
On this particularly Friday, Eddie was on edge and ready to squirrel away somewhere that didn't have happy couples taking advantage under the mistletoe.
Or hear the giggles of girls when they caught their crushes under it...
Or Gareth trying to catch his crush under the mistletoe and ranting in Eddie's ear when it didn't work out.
Maybe he would set up shop in the drama room until Hellfire so he could get some peace?
Jesus h christ he was done for the day and if one more person bothered him...
Someone tugs on his arm and he turns around ready to bitch the asshole out. No doubt it's some clown jock.
Then he sees you smiling at him and his bad mood disapatates completely.
His mood instantly picks up and he feels himself go to mush as you beam at him.
Shit, you really did make him speechless, he usually alternated between showing off for your attention or being like this... A complete and utter goner for you.
"Hi, Eddie" he smiles at you and tries to school his expression so he doesn't look like a goofy idiot.
"Princess" he answers and he loves the way you smile at his nickname for you. Princess was reserved for special people only... Well just you really.
You look nervous. Did he make you feel that way? You made him nervous as shit and he wasn't used to feeling like this.
"Eddie, look" you point up at the ceiling and he freezes when he sees mistletoe.
"Uh hey look at that" he stammers out and his heartbeat races in his chest when you kiss his cheek, he turns his head a fraction and his lips meet yours.
He melts into the kiss. It's perfect. Like rolling a d20 at a critical point in a campaign, mastering Metallica's new song and the first time he saw his sweetheart (his guitar)
The little moan you make leaves Eddie feeling like he's on cloud nine and when you move away he desperately wants to pull you back so he can keep kissing you.
"Maybe now you can finally ask me on that date" you tease him and he obliges as soon as the blood returns to his brain and not uh... Other parts of him.
Okay, it was official. Eddie Munson loved mistletoe.
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clementinecleo · 1 month
Text
Know how
young Ford + Reader
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Summary..
You and Ford are working on a research paper, and you comfort him about his 'weirdness'
non genderd reader
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You and Ford first met in college due to having the same morning lecture. He was nervous and slightly confused when you decided to start a conversation with him about Constellations, and soon It was small things here and there. A walk n talk, or just a quick wave around campus. Eventually, you guys became acquaintances. Getting coffee and reading together, he was always nose deep in his books.
And one day during class, your professor announced a project for your midterm. Telling you all to form into groups of however many people, and you turned your head to look at Ford, who was sitting next to you. He was chewing on his pen before he noticed you staring at him.
You looked at his eyes, smiling gently as you spoke up. “Partners?” with a tilt of your head. He nodded. The rest of the class consisted of the professor explaining what to do and how to, and then let everyone go.
As you packed up and got ready to go back to your dorm to absolutely pass out, Ford cleared his throat. You shook the tiredness out of your head and glanced at him. “should we go to yours? For the project, I mean.” You interrupted him with a chuckle and replied. “Yeah, sure dude. Follow me” you gestured, walking down the steps with him trailing behind you like a stray dog.
As you both walked, you spoke up. "Hey, do you have any other friends? Not in a mean way- just I only ever see you walking alone."
Ford rubbed the back of his neck and replied solemnly. "Well my only close friend is fiddleford. He's my roommate. But he's in a lot of different programs so we don't see eachother much on campus other than in our shared dorm"
You grin, "Fiddleford? I remember him! He was the one who fell asleep in the fountain after a party right?"
Ford chuckled and nodded "I had to carry him back to our dorm. Woke up the next day not remembering anything from the night before."
You both walked in comfortable silence through the winding hallways. footsteps echoed and voices boomed as people passed by. At one point going down an elevator a girl giggled at Ford and murmured something crude about him. Immediately Ford shrunk back, shoving his hands in his pockets. You gave the girl a disgusted look before trying to walk up to her and ask why she was being a bitch but you felt a hesitant tug of your sleeve.
Ford had an unreadable look on his face as he shoved his hands into his pockets. muttering a small “it's fine, really. Don't worry about her.” you gave him a ‘are you sure?’ and he just nodded, then looked away.
The second week of you two casually hanging out, Ford asked looked up from his notebook and looked at you. "Why did you approach me, y/n?" he asked, curious about your reasoning.
And you awnserd truthfully. "Well, I actually thought you were really smart for someone going to..this college. And it fascinated me. What nade you want to come here? Whats your backstory.-" but halfway through talking you can see a very confused and surprised look on his face. And before you could even ask, he opened his mouth. “and..not for my fingers?”
He lifted both his hands towards you. wiggling them, really trying to prove that you supposedly faking it. This was his way if trying to freak you out and drive you away. But it back fired horribly.
You looked at him bewilderd, and as he held his hand up you counted. 1..2..3..4..5..6!
You gave him an excited smile and basically shouted at him. “Oh my god! I didn't even notice- that's so cool man!” after asking your 7th question about his hands you realized you had just made him extremely uncomfortable. And you apologized profusely. he didn't talk to you for a couple days after that. So you never dared to mention them again. Even going as far as to not look at his hands at all.
You guys got to your dorm and as you opened your door he was hit with the scent of your favorite candle and the cool air conditioning. His body relaxed, before he gently closed the door and sat on a nearby chair. Looking out of place while pulling out his note book in your very..interestingly decorated dorm.
“So, we should get started on the research first and make sure every source is as factual as possible-” He took his nose out of his book to look over at you to see if you were listening to him but your eyes were trained on his fingers.
"can I see your hand?" you ask with a blank face.
Oh.
He sighed. Why would he ever think he'd make a friend as popular as you? He went straight to overthinking. Imagining you laughing at him or running out the door to go gossip with your multitude of friends across campus. He gave up. Might aswell show you, he's never better for anything else but his weirdness.
You grabbed his hands so gently he barely noticed you even touched them. You handled them with such care as if you breathed the wrong way he'd shatter. Your hands were smooth and warm.
A shiver crawled down his back as you ran your index finger up and down each and every six of his fingers. Circling around every knuckle and especially his thumbs. Lifting his hand up so you could see his palm. Tracing the lines and indents across it- and it reminded him of when his mother would give him palm readings. and suddenly, he wasn't so afraid of you anymore. It all washed away.
You were absolutely and utterly mesmerized. You'd never seen such beautiful hands.
“Stanford, your hands are divine.”
You muttered out.
His heart jumped up into his throat and his face turned as pink as bubblegum, stammering and watching you fiddle with his middle finger..or well one of them. He watches in amazement, his heart beating through his chest. Butterflies galore, how could one ever handle holding hands with someone? Gosh he was overthinking- you're hands are so reassuring. This is too new, you're so gentle and any time your finger runs up his hand he tries not to let out an embarrassing gasp.
"Ford?" You speak up. "You still there?"
"Yes! of course. Why do you ask?" His hands are so sweaty now and suddenly he can smell his bo and gets self conscious on the one empty pizza box he left out.
"Everything about you is so intriguing and weird..but in a good way. Your hands- your fingers. They're amazing." you say in awe.
Fords cheeks go a deep red and he starts coughing, nodding along. And he froze when you said his fingers were amazing. "You really think so?" he says, locking eyes with you.
"Of course. I've never seen something so..stunning. You're such a oddball, Stanford Pines." you chuckled.
the rest of the night was filled with you and Ford having a deep conversation about things, almost forgetting you had a paper to work on.
You both smiled at eachother fondly and the night went on.
💫
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steddieas-shegoes · 4 months
Note
congrats on 3000 followers 💫 you deserve it honey!🧡 Also, Chappell Roan has been stuck in my head, so I’m suggesting a lyric of hers for a prompt:
“I could be the one, or your new addiction.”
(Or any lyric from HOT TO GO!)
Thank you! I’m right there with you, Chappell Roan the incredible bitch that you are 👏🏻
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“He’s had one drink and he’s acting like he had a bottle of vodka,” Robin shook her head while she watched Steve dancing with two guys in the middle of the club they’d only been at for an hour.
“He needed to let loose,” Eddie shrugged, looking down at the drink he’d barely taken a sip from.
Robin looked at him, frowned, then looked back to Steve. She desperately needed them to get their shit together, but Steve acting like this definitely wasn’t going to work. It didn’t help that Eddie had been acting moody all day, barely even wanted to come with them.
“And what about you?” She finally asked him. “Are you gonna let loose tonight or keep the stick up your ass until you go to bed?”
Eddie’s head shot up, ready to argue. He didn’t, though. He looked back down at his drink and sighed.
“Not really feeling like letting loose, birdie.”
“Why not?”
Eddie shrugged and stayed silent.
“Did something happen?” She pushed. Even on his moody days, he was still usually capable of putting on a smile for her or the kids.
“No, just me being dumb. Making assumptions,” Eddie snorted. “Should be used to it by now.”
“What assumptions?” The song changed to something even louder and she considered dragging Eddie to the outside seating so they could talk.
“Just thought I was making progress on something and I clearly wasn’t.”
Oh, so it’s about Steve.
Eddie hadn’t really talked to her about his feelings, but she caught on early. She watched the way Eddie prioritized Steve over everyone and everything else, how he smiled when Steve was happy, how his mood shifted when Steve was having a bad day. She’d be worried more about it if she didn’t know that Steve was the exact same way.
They were idiots, both of them.
“What makes you think that?” She took a sip of her drink to seem more casual, but Eddie wasn’t that much of an idiot.
“Pretty obvious where I stand when someone’s leaving his room early in the morning, Robin.”
So he did know Robin knew.
“Someone slept over last night?” Robin didn’t know that. Steve rarely brought people to his apartment he shared with Eddie, and he hadn’t in nearly a year. Robin didn’t even know the last time he showed interest in anyone beyond getting a free drink from them.
“Yeah. She seemed like his type. I’m sure you’ll hear all about it soon.”
Robin squinted back at Steve dancing.
He would have told her by now about bringing someone home. They’d been together all afternoon.
“I don’t think he slept with her,” she finally said.
“Yeah, okay. I’m sure they just cuddled all night.”
Robin rolled her eyes. “It’s not what you think, I’m telling you.”
“Sure.”
She couldn’t do or say anything else, just had to let Eddie brood about not being in Steve’s bed even though he could fix it if he just said something.
She finished her drink and excused herself to join Steve. Maybe he could tell her what was going on.
“Hey dingus,” she yelled as she got closer.
Steve turned and smiled at her, sweat dripping from his forehead. “Robs! Hi!”
“Hey, babe. Did you forget to eat today?”
Steve nodded.
“Thought so. Let’s go get you some water.”
She dragged him to the bar and managed to get the bartender to get him water before anyone else got more drinks. She forced him to drink half of it before they walked back towards the table in the corner Eddie hadn’t moved from.
“Eddie! You should dance with me,” Steve exclaimed as he sat next to Eddie and grabbed his arm.
“Maybe next time, Stevie,” Eddie smiled at him, but it didn’t reach his eyes. Steve was still a little too drunk to notice, but Robin saw it.
“Awww, you never dance with me anymore. I miss you.”
Robin could see how hard it was for Eddie to hold himself together. Every possible emotion was flickering behind his eyes.
“Maybe that girl you had over last night will dance with you,” he finally settled on, which Robin immediately wanted to shove back into his mouth.
Steve sat back and seemed to be trying to figure out what Eddie meant when the beat of his current favorite song came on.
“Oh my god! Eddie! Please dance with me!” Steve clapped his hands and stood from the stool he’d been sitting on.
Eddie looked sad, but also endlessly endeared by Steve’s excitement.
“I could be the one or your new addiction!”
Steve was yelling the lyrics right at Eddie, not realizing how much Eddie was hurting.
Robin was his platonic soulmate and Eddie was on of her best friends. She couldn’t keep watching this.
“Steve, maybe you should get some fresh air,” she grabbed his shoulder and tried to turn him away, but he looked mad.
“No, this is my favorite song.”
“Steve, c’mon. Just for a minute. We can listen to this when we get outside if you want.”
Eddie was looking back down at his drink, biting his lip so hard it looked like it might bleed.
“Only if Eddie goes with me,” Steve folded his arms across his chest and pouted.
“Eddie’s gonna save our table in here,” Robin said.
But surprisingly, Eddie interrupted her by standing up and throwing back the rest of his drink.
“I’ll take him.”
Steve cheered and started singing along again as Eddie and Robin shared a look.
Eddie wrapped an arm around Steve’s waist and guided him towards the back door that led to a small seating area outside. Steve was singing the whole way, but he rested his head against Eddie’s shoulder while they walked.
“Why are you sad tonight?” Steve asked as they made their way to the only available table outside.
“I’m not.”
“Friends don’t lie.”
“I’m not lying,” Eddie lied.
“Then dance with me. I love dancing with you,” Steve didn’t move his head from Eddie’s shoulder even when they sat down.
“I love dancing with you too,” Eddie managed to say before he felt a lump in his throat.
He loved doing everything with Steve, even dancing to pop songs at a club, and it was only hurting him more to keep pretending it was enough.
“I even taught you the dance to that song,” Steve said quieter. “Remember?”
“Yeah,” Eddie smiled to himself, tightening his grip around Steve’s shoulders. “Made me put my hips into it.”
“Because you have nice hips,” Steve sighed.
Eddie could feel his face heating up. Steve wasn’t sober enough, he didn’t know what the hell he was saying.
“I barely have hips at all,” Eddie managed to choke out.
“Not true. I like holding them. They’re perfect.”
Okay, Eddie couldn’t do this. Robin needed to read his mind and come outside and-
“Wanna hold them now.”
“Steve, you’re drunk. You-“
“Can we dance?” Steve interrupted.
“The music isn’t loud out here.”
“I can sing it.”
“We’ll be the only ones dancing.”
Steve tilted his head back and looked at Eddie. “When has that stopped you before?”
“Fine.”
Eddie stood and let Steve hold his hips, almost a slow dance, while Steve started singing the song.
“Baby, do you like this beat, I made it so you’d dance with me.”
Eddie loved when Steve sang. He wasn’t the best, but he had a smooth voice that made Eddie smile, regardless of the song he was singing.
They were swaying like it was a slow song, but the vibrations of the bass line coming through the walls of the club made it obvious it wasn’t meant to be.
“I didn’t sleep with her,” Steve said after he went through the chorus once.
“Okay.”
Steve looked frustrated. “Some guy was trying to take her back to his place and he wouldn’t take no for an answer so I let her Uber back with me and she ended up just spending the night. Nothing happened.”
“That’s…fine. I don’t need to hear about it,” Eddie knew he sounded rude, but he truly couldn’t make it through the night if Steve gave a play by play of getting cozy with someone else.
“I don’t ever want anything to happen with anyone but you.”
Eddie stopped swaying. He was pretty sure the music stopped inside. No one else existed except for them.
“What?” He finally squeaked out.
Steve was looking at him like he was the sun.
“No matter who I dance with or flirt with or hang out with, you’re the only one who matters. It’s just you, Eds.”
He was drunk, but drunk Steve never lied. Eddie knew that for a fact. He’d said some harsh truths before when he had more whiskey than he should’ve.
“I don’t understand.”
Steve searched his eyes and bit his lip, like he was considering what to say.
But then his lips were on Eddie’s, soft, cautious.
He was holding back.
Eddie didn’t want him to.
Eddie wrapped his arms around Steve’s waist and pulled him forward so their chests were flush against each other, tongue licking along Steve’s bottom lip to deepen the kiss.
Steve allowed it, moaning as he let Eddie hold most of his weight.
Before they could get too carried away in public, Eddie pulled away to catch his breath and try to get his heart to slow before he passed out.
“Steve, this can’t just be a fun thing. This is…this is everything to me. You’re everything to me.”
Steve nodded, eyes never leaving Eddie’s. “I know. You’re maybe the love of my life. I’m drunk but I know how I feel. Felt that way for years.”
Years?
“Years? And you just now decided to say something?” Eddie wasn’t looking forward to Robin’s ‘I told you so.’
“Couldn’t. Didn’t wanna scare you away.”
“There’s no fucking way you’d ever do that. I’ve been yours for three years whether you knew it or not,” Eddie laughed in disbelief.
“We should go home,” Steve said quickly.
“You tryin’ to take me hot to go?” Eddie teased.
“If you’ll let me,” Steve nodded, tugging on Eddie’s hand to get him to move faster.
“I’ll let you do anything you want, Stevie.”
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Text
💫 03/09/24 💫 @rosekillermicrofic 💫 prompt: dressed 💫 word count: 171 words
Barty wouldn’t be caught dead in a suit. But Regulus threatened to kill him if he didn’t look presentable at his wedding so he was actually caught alive in a suit much to his humiliation. He’d do anything for Reg, and he was using that to his advantage, the manipulative bitch. James Potter had agreed to a small gathering of everyone they knew which meant just under 500 people but hey, who was Barty to judge? If Barty ever got married he would have the most overly extravagant wedding just because he could. But he wasn’t about to get married anytime soon.
“Merlin Bee you’re in a suit! That’s a day for the history books!”
Oh. Oh wow. Maybe Barty would get married. Evan had his locs tied back with a silver ribbon and little silver rings were studded through his hair. And his suit sharpened his shoulders and his waist, and Barty’s gaze.
“Look at you Rosie all dressed up,”
“I’d look better dressed down,” he smirked quietly, “wanna see?”
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angelliicc · 9 days
Text
xo, call me
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“so if its feeling right
why should we say goodbye?”
masterlist
a/n hi guysss!! im back bc i finished my exams this week. im deadass tired and trying to not fall asleep. anyways enjoy
warnings not proofread, mentions of ex bf
| the final bell rang in bio, making your way to math class. you usually stayed on the 3rd floor, waiting for all the chaos on the staircases to die down. you wore a black sweatshirt, jeans, along with your black converse. you hair was half-up half-down with a red bow. as you were walking to math, your ex found you in the hallway. he had always been very clingy, never understanding.
“hey there pretty girl.” he said to you as he followed you down to the first floor. you got icked out immediately.
“leave me alone please.” you told him, attempting to walk faster.
“not when you look this beautiful.” he said, as he grabbed your arm to make you stay close to him.
“dont touch me!” you said in a stern tone, immediately making sure he released your arm. thankfully by your surprise, a girl was watching the whole time.
she had auburn hair that was up half-up half-down and went above her shoulders, green eyes, and freckles. she wore a hoodie with green parachute pants.
the way she saw the situation, she was immediately worried, so she decided to step in.
“the fuck you think you’re doing?” she said to the guy.
“talking to the prettiest girl i know.” he replied, looking straight into your eyes.
she wrapped her arm around your neck and shoulder. “a girl thats taken.”
you looked at her, “wait wh-?”
she gave you a look, basically telling you to shut up in a nice way. then it clicked.
“what your mouth next time you’re around her, or ill kick your ass. got it?” she repeated defensively.
the guy wasn’t scared, but annoyed. he left in defeat, a scoff leaving his mouth as he rolled his eyes.
“hope you didn’t mind. i didn’t like the way he talked to you. im ellie.” ellie said.
“no, thank you. i really appreciate it.” you told her.
on the outside, you looked fine. but on the inside, you we’re freaking out. not because of fear, but because of how brave she was. she did that, for you. for your safety. you blushed at the thought of her defending you again.
“how do you know him? seems like a bitch.” she asked, as you both walked down in the hallway.
“ex-boyfriend, sadly.” you replied. “but once again, i really thank you for helping me out there. do you mind if i get your number?” you didn’t think twice as the words left your lips.
“oh no, not at all.” she said as she handed you her phone to put your number in. “thanks”
“see you again sometime?” you asked nervously.
“yeah, see ya.”
your brain was still trying to comprehend and process what the fuck just happened, as everything happened so fast.
a few hours later the school day ended. you decided to text ellie.
r: “hii”
e: “heyy, how ru?”
r: “im good wbu?”
e: “tired”
r: “same.”
e: “dyk if you have any classes with me?”
r: “no not really, whats your schedule?”
ellie then sent a photo of each block that she had, 1-7.
r: “we have math and history together”
e: “i can finally have someone to talk to, lol”
r: “sameee”
e: “hey about earlier, sorry if i pushed a boundary i didn’t know about. i just didn’t like the way he talked to you, it just made my blood boil. if you don’t wanna talk to me anymore, i completely understand. i wont take it personal.”
r: “nonono, i really liked it that you stuck up for me. no ones ever done that for me before. and i do want to keep talking to you. you seem like a really cool person.”
e: “thank you, thats one of the best compliments ive received.”
r: “im gonna head to bed, but ill see you tomorrow! good night”
e: “night 💫”
as you put your phone away, it was hard to fall asleep. all you did was think about her. she was on your mind for that entire night. because what you both had, felt right.
weeks went by, and you guys became an incredible duo. you both were always together. you knew what made each other smile, happy, laugh, cry, become sad, and so much more.
finally, it was hoco week. you already knew what to wear, since the theme was ocean. as you got to school, ellie asked you the question that every student asked their peers. “are you going to homecoming?”
“yeah, i really wanna go. i already have my outfit. i dont have a date, but its fine.” you told her.
the bell rang, signaling for students to get to their first class. “ive got dance, ill see you later tho.” you told her
“peace, i got bio-med.” she replied.
block 1 officially ended, giving students a 15 minute passing period. you sat outside, waiting for ellie. “wheres this girl?” you thought. suddenly, a crowd began to form. you turned around and saw ellie standing infront of you, with a poster and flowers. everyone had their phones out, recording your answer and reaction.
your face lit up in shock, with you hands covering your face. will you be my supermodel for the weekend @ hoco? the poster said. “she remembered my fav artist, sza. and my fav flowers.” you thought. “yes!!” you said as you ran up to hug her.
“im not done.” she told you in your ears as you gave her a hug. “will you be my girlfriend?”
this moment couldn’t be real. it was all a dream. you were on cloud 9. you wanted someone to pinch you. “of course i will.” you replied as you gave her a kiss on her lips.
i’ve been everywhere, seen everyone
but what we got feels right.
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felswritingfire · 1 year
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Homelander x Chaotic! Hyper Fem!Reader
The Homelander brainrot is real and I hate it with my whole being. I want this man dead, he's so pathetic. Anyway, I haven't watched The Boys but I'm hooked on his character thanks to falling down the rabbit hole with Character.Ai and all the talented writers for The Boys fandom, like? Absolutely scrumptious works. Also I just really wanted to write for a chaotic reader, the hyper fem part came after lmao
TW: This was written with a AFAB reader in mind so there's descriptions of Reader wearing a skirt, no pronouns specified; Homelander's creepiness is considerably toned down for this, but he does break into reader's apartment and actively stalks them; Reader says some saucy stuff; Cussing; Homelander has a panic attack/mental break down; Reader is a horny virgin; Age Gap, it's only mentioned once or twice, but it's still there and prevalent; Gen Z humor- reader is a Gen Z baby, they're in their early 20s
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"You didn't tell me that Homelander had a slutty ass waist." The words caught him off guard. They were whispered. Somewhere in the crowd. His eyes fought to stay glued onto the press speaker, his smile twitching ever so slightly.  The comment had hung in his head, floating around like a phantom, even as he took the stage and did his speech perfectly. Like always. He preens as the people clap and cheer for him.  Then the voice chirps out, in the safety of the cheering and the noise: "Homelander? More like Sluttylander, am I right?" He hears a scoff after that, zeroing in on the conversation now: two women. No older than their mid 20s. "Hey, I mean that respectfully." "You know he's like 20 years older than you, right?" "I'll bend him over and make him call me daddy. I'm not a coward." A cackle. He had scanned the crowd while keeping a smile plastered on his lips. He was curious what foul mouth little shit was talking. Until his gaze lands on… you.  You look like the cat that got the cream as you look at your friend who has to hold onto you for support as she giggles and laughs. Your bright eyed gaze moves from her back to him just to tense as you catch his gaze. "Um," you elbow her- Renae- to get her attention and she giggles before she looks and she's freezing too. "He isn't looking at us is he?" She shrugs. "I don't know…" she trails off. You squint before covering your mouth with your hands, talking just loud enough for Renae to hear you but no one else. "Blink twice if you can hear us." It was a joke. There's no way- And then he's blinking. Once. Twice.  "Oh bitch-tits." You want to scream, grabbing Renae's wrist, pushing through the crowd. "Fuck, dude, this is going to be my thirteenth reason, I swear to fuck-"  He watches the two of you go. He shouldn't be interested. You're just some snot nosed kid. But… how you spoke, the chaotic-ness of it all. The way the light caught your hair, the curves of your body, the way that skirt flares up as you scurry away... he's intrigued to say the least…
💫 Homelander wasn't normally so… interested in the general public, but he had been quick to commit your face and voice to memory. He had actually stumbled upon you, finding out you worked at some high-end retail job. You dealt with snooty people and all the while kept up that pretty little customer service smile despite the clear signs of barely concealed frustration searing under your skin. He could smell the heat of your blood and watched you through the building's walls when you went on break and sat down stiffly, just to scream into your hands. It started out as something funny because he found your misery amusing and then the descent into madness started.
💫 It was like he went through the five stages of grief. At first he had convinced himself that he keeps watching you out of sheer amusement. And then he started to take in more pieces of you: how you took care of things you treasure; how you cared and cooed at the plants that were in your house; how you talked to that damn fish that your treasured so much; your little mannerisms- things he started to find… cute. Then it was denile: no he didn't find you cute he found you amusing. He laughed when you seethed about your toast burning; how you had a breakdown as soon as you got off work because the crushing weight of living in a capitalistic society came crashing down on you; how you talked to yourself like you were having a full blown conversation with another person- you were amusing. And then came the realization and then rage: how dare you make him feel like this? You were just a sniveling little thing. He was a god. How dare you? And then came acceptance. He was… casual when he accepted it. Like all the turmoil had fallen off his shoulders. He was watching you, taking in how you nurtured your "plant children", how you talked to them and wiped the dust off their leaves. It made his heart flutter.
💫 After that, his casual viewings become much more of a time investment as he pays closer and closer attention to you. Every waking moment he has when he's not busy juggling the press and Vought, is spent watching you. Taking in information and storing it in his brain for safe keeping: what you like to eat; your favorite type of plant; your dream vacation; what type of fish you have (you have a betta. He searched them up. He learned all about them to feel closer to you). 
💫 Soon enough, observing isn't enough. He starts to go into your apartment when you're not home, looking at the coziness of your space. Taking in the scent and looking at your plants and your Betta fish that flares his gills at him. It makes him snort in amusement. How cute. He'll lay on your bed, shoving his face into your pillows and inhaling deeply, moaning in contentment. 
💫 He also starts to "coincidentally" run into you on the streets. He finds it so funny each time you gawk at him. A "holy fuck!" Leaving you as you gesture wildly, "it's fucking Homelander!" 
○ He's not too keen on your potty mouth, but he supposes he can let it slide. He's just as bad.
💫 He smiles his charming little smile as he'll make small talk with you, his hands on his hips as he takes you in. He loves knowing how much stronger he is than you and he has to fight hard to keep from popping a boner. You're so fun to talk to, you say the most out of pocket things:
"Yeah, like, almost got stabbed by a homeless man today. Like, 0/10 would not recommend." You said, looking at your nails. Frowning about the nail polish already chipping. "Yeah, well, not many people put 'being stabbed' at the top of their list of things to happen to them." He replies with a laugh, moving closer to you, taking in that mellow perfume you wear. "I mean, I'm down for knife play, but I'm a classy slut. You have to take me to dinner first." He's flabbergasted. He loves it.
💫 He begins to insert himself into your life, taking up more and more of your free time, you don't even notice it at first. How he just… starts spending time at your home. How you two begin a ritual of movie night every Saturday (he forced Vought to make that day his off day. He was not to be called under any circumstance short of the world going to implode on itself). You have so many emotions in that body of yours and he finds it amusing when you gasp or a look of disgust crosses your face at something a character did. You'd be horrible at poker.
"What the fu-" He has an easy smile on his face as he wraps his arm around your shoulders and places his hand over your mouth. Not threateningly. More playful than anything. You simply hold onto his hand with both of yours as you watch the screen. 
💫 You catch him off guard all the time. Your girly appearance gives nothing away to the chaotic tendencies. You were the closest thing to an actual agent of chaos he's seen. He once watched you, while you were with that little friend of yours- Renae- run across the street as a group of men cat called you, swinging your purse at high velocity speed, yelling: "I'll fucking end your bloodline!" The men were terrified and scurried off screaming "crazy bitch!" You had given Renae a thumbs up, proud of yourself. He also watched you steal a pro-life abortion sign "saying Jesus wouldn't want this" and javelin throwing it into someone's backyard pool before bolting down the street, cackling. Both times in heels. Both times he was weirdly turned on. 
💫 He likes how girly you dress. He loves it actually. He loves all the soft pastel colors you wear and the pleated skirts. It makes you look soft and delicate and he's obsessed with it. He has a tendency to pull at the hem of your skirt, flick it up slightly. You just give him a dead stare and lift up your skirt. "Shorts, bitch." You do it every time and he thinks it's funny.
💫 He hates that you're home screen is a collage of Soldier Boy with that stupid cursive font saying: "my daddy is super dead, but he could still hit it <;3". He hates it and then your lock screen is of your fish.
"Why do you have that?" He asks with disdain.  "What?" She asks looking up at him. He rolls his eyes. "Don't play stupid. Why is he your wallpaper? He's dead. He's been dead." Sure, that was his hero but like hell he wanted to see that man's charming smirk on your homescreen. "Soldier Boys is hot." You say it with all the seriousness of someone telling a prophecy. Homelander's eye twitches. "And I'm not." "No. You are. With your slutty waist." She assures him. "But Soldier Boy is the OG daddy." He scoffs. 
● He ends up stealing your phone later on when you're not looking and changing the wallpaper himself, having memorized your password.
💫 For as flirty and raunchy your mind was, you were oddly freaked out of genuine touch. The first time he tried to make a move on you, you screamed and almost gave yourself a concussion with how you fell over the arm of the couch. He was stunned until you explained you had issues with romantic touch. "Daddy issues, am I right?" She tries to play it off with a laugh. He is not laughing. Later, though, he starts to find it amusing, taking the chance to make you squirm and blush is so funny to him. He revels in your pain and embarrassment.
● He has killed people who had done the same. Like, actually snapped a guy's neck for it.
💫 He is NOT thrilled when you talk about wanting to rail fictional characters. He actually gets pouty. Genuinely gets pissy. He tries to ban you from watching anime.
"But. Toji hot." "I don't care if 'Toji hot'. He spits. "Toji is a fictional character. You need a real man that knows how to please you." You look at him, eating a spoonful of cereal despite his protests about eating it so late. You chew slowly and swallow. "Toji's got that potent dad nut. It works, John." Homelander practically chokes on his spit at that.
💫 He lets you call him John. He likes when you call him John. Call him John.
💫 He actually tries to be better for you because you've voiced how you didn't like when people get hurt. He tries. Key word tries to be more aware, to be a better person. Just for you. 
💫 Absolutely goes insane if you praise him. It's all he wants and all her craves. You've casually complimented him once and he's latched onto it ever since. He's infatuated with your praise. He's like a puppy, looking to you after he did a good deed, looking to you when he does a chore right. It's almost better than sex for him. Almost.
💫 He's elated when you let him lay in your lap. Despite how squeamish you were about sex, you craved physical touch and, guess what? So does he! He's obsessed with laying down and taking in your sweet scent, your fingers playing with his hair as you scroll through your phone. He adores the casual touches you leave on him, adore every time you hang onto his arm. He knows you don't mean anything romantic, but it still fills a hole to have a genuine companion that cares about him in his life. 
💫 You've helped him after a breakdown, when his mind felt like it was splitting and his ego was taking in a mind of its own- and then there you were. In all your pretty, pastel colored and pleated skirt glory.
"John?" You say softly, not approaching him just yet. Giving him the space he needs. "Do you need a hug?" He's breathing hard. He didn't know why he came to your apartment. He thought he was going back to his penthouse in Vought towers. But no. Here he was. And you're standing there, confused about your pretty features. The chaotic side of you is completely gone for the moment. He just stares at you. Of course you'd run to some bitch. A voice hisses in his head. We're a god among men and you come crawling to some fucking-  He squeezes his eyes shut. Your eyes soften. "Come on." You say, your voice soft and gently. A soft coo to him. "Let's sit you down." You open the door wider for him and he trudges in, looking completely drained. He sinks into your couch and you disappear into your room and come out with a fuzzy blanket. The one you wrap around the two of you have movie night. You drape it over him, gently. "It's ok, sweetheart," you say. "I don't know what's happening but you're safe now." He almost scoffs. No one could touch him. He was The Homelander. But… how you said it. It made his chest ache with something heavy. "Can… Can you hold me?" He practically whispers. "Of course, honey." You open your arms up for him. He immediately melts into your hold, his head pressing against the crook of your neck, his hands desperately clinging to the back of your shirt. He sucks in a breath of your scent before he breaks, fat tears rolling down his cheeks as his sobs into you.  He's not a pretty crier. But who is? You run your hand through his hair. Your cheek resting against his head. It feels strange to see a man that could be your father break down. But you had a feeling he was a mess on the inside. All that bravado and charisma making up for an abysmal childhood.  It takes him a while to calm down. His puffy eyes blinking, his blue eyes glassy, he sniffles.  "Oh, sweetie," you coo, swiping your thumb under his eyes to wipe the tear streaks away. "You look like a mess." You say softly, not to make fun of him. Just to state an obvious fact. He sniffles, glaring at you.  You smile at him and he melts.
💫 He won't let you paint his nails, but he wants to paint your nails. He has a pension for picking colors related to him. You make fun of him for it. 
💫 He lets you put accessories in his hair. ONLY when it's movie night. He did accidentally go to a meeting with a hair clip that has rhinestones that spelt 'JUICY' on it. The Seven stayed silent and he was embarrassed as hell when he saw it in the mirror of the window.
💫 HE IS ACTUALLY TRAUMATIZED WHEN YOU FIGURE OUT HE WEARS A BODYSUIT OH MY GOD. HE SUFFERS. THAT'S HOW YOU GET HIM BACK FOR MESSING WITH YOUR FLUSTEREDNESS.
"What's up, my cute stick bug." "Shut the fuck up."  You are the only person allowed to poke fun at him about that. Anyone else would get obliterated.
💫 If you involve him in picking out your outfits, he has hit Nirvana. He has truly seen heaven. He actually has a pretty solid eye for clothes. But he will take the opportunity to coordinate an outfit that has colors that compliment his hero outfit. If you notice, he'll play dumb.
💫 Anyway, congratulations, you have an OP friend. Until he isn't content with just being friends any more….
Thank you for reading! If you'd like to support me consider donating to my Ko-fi!
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k-n0-x · 5 months
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༺ ♱✮♱ ¨:·Something Stupid- Chapter 5·:¨ ♱✮♱ ༻
A/N- Hello everyone! Sorry this chapter took sooooo long to get out. I compensated in making it a bit longer than the usual chapters. I hope y’all enjoy :3
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꧁🥀☽💫✶♛🦢♕✶💫☾🥀꧂
“Well, did you enjoy that Emily?” You ask Emily as you both pass through the portal, and onto your porch.
“Yes! I finally get what you mean when you say Charlie and I are alike,”
“Sweetie, you are carbon copies of each other, it’s not that hard to come to that conclusion ,”   You smile, and jump when you remember something. 
“By the way, Sinners can be redeemed! I did some digging around a couple of days ago, but I forgot to tell you,” 
For a moment, Emily becomes silent, letting the news sink in. 
Shs squeals. 
“Oh this is amazing! That means that-” 
“That what, Emily?”
The voice of the Elder Seraphim makes you jump out of your skin. 
“Hi, Sera, uhm just, er,” You lose face in front of Sera, but she is more looking at Emily than you. 
“Where exactly have the two of you been? Emily I was looking all around for you today,”
“Oh she was just hanging out with me at my house today-”
“I didn't see you around at all today,” Adam pops up behind you.
Ah yes, him. 
“Were you not out all day today?” You counter. 
“Enough! I already knew that Emily was in Hell with you,”
Your mouth agape, you make an attempt to form a plausible excuse. 
“I uh, just wanted to help out with the aftermath of the extermination and I just invited Emily along, please don't punish her, I really pushed her into it,”  You grimace. Surely there’s going to be a berating headed your way.
Emily gives you a confused look, and you return it with a warning one. 
“Whatever for? It's not like it works anyway,” Sera, despite spewing her bullshit, has her head up high. 
The latter remark makes you stick out your chin, with a defensive attitude. 
“Uh, yes it does, actually,” You smile innocently.
Sera’s face pales. 
“What, what do you mean? Obviously, sinners do not have the capacity to be redeemed,”
“Yeah, the big shot’s right. Those little, dare I say, cunts have already fucked up their one chance, why give them another?”
Your ‘husband’ sides with the Seraphim, but Emily stays beside you. 
“Well why not discuss this in court then?” Your eyes, almost manic glares into the ones of the first man. 
“Wha- What the fuck man? You can't do that-Right Sera, she just can't-”
“No, she can… When do you want to hold the meeting?” She turns to you. 
“Perhaps the day after the next? So that we'll have time to prepare,”
“.... Very well. Emily, let's go,”
Em stays back a bit and mutters, “Whatever happens, I’m on your side. I’ll try to help in anyway I can,”
“You don’t have to,” you mumble back.
“Emily! Let’s go,” Sera hisses. The two Seraphims leave the patio of your home.
“Why the fuck does this matter to you so much bitch?” Adam points an accusing finger at you, which you slap away.
“Oh, I don't know, maybe I want to uphold true Heavenly values? You of all people should know that,” You hiss back. 
“Uh, no. Sinners can't be redeemed, now stop preaching all this dumb bullshit, and get ready, because you're going down, bitch,” 
You bite your tongue, because God forbid you send him into a frenzy. You don’t have the time or energy for his tantrum right now.
“Well, I'm going to bed bitch, God, I am so handsome, and cool and amazing,” Adam sashays to the bedroom, irritating you so. 
You pave a path to the living room.
You look at the couch.
You are not planning on sleeping on the same bed as Adam tonight. 
Or the next, for that matter.
You flop on the couch like a tired dog, and doze off. 
꧁ꕥ❂♕☻☹☻♕❂ꕥ❂♕☻☹☻♕❂ꕥ❂♕☻☹☻♕❂ꕥ❂♕☻☹☻♕❂ꕥ꧂
You’re in a desolate landscape. It's familiar. 
Oh yeah, you've been here before. 
Adjacent to you is the pedestal with the glowing ball. 
“Yeah, I’m not doing that again,” You step away from the monument and bump into something.
Or rather, someone.
“Sera? What are you- hey!” The Seraphim suddenly pushes you without warning, cascading you down into a dark pit.
Dark pit… This has happened before.
What the fuck is going on?
Despite your confusion you flap your wings in the darkness, but as soon as you get to the top of the hole again, some force drags you down. 
You look towards the surface, and see exterminators grinning (quite ironically) devilishly at the sight of your downfall
You spiral into the abyss, and the familiar heat appears. 
You hit the ground with a thud, and jump out of your couch, sun rays peeking through the curtains.
What was that dream? That's the second time today that you had a dream such as this. 
What's that glowing ball about?
Why, in the second dream, Sera pushed you into that hole?
Why couldn't you fly? 
Why, did you fall? 
Also, what is up with the ground at the bottom of the pothole?
It was so different from the  empty landscape at the surface, with its red hot coals.
You rub your eyes with your trembling hands. It felt so real, as if your hands are suffering the aftermath of being burnt on the scorching stones.
There's no point crying about it now. 
Time to become your own attorney.
꧁ꕥ❂♕☻☹☻♕❂ꕥ❂♕☻☹☻♕❂ꕥ❂♕☻☹☻♕❂ꕥ❂♕☻☹☻♕❂ꕥ꧂
“So, let me get this straight. There's a court meeting tomorrow and you need Charlie  to be there. On short notice?!” Vaggie groans and rubs her temples. 
“This is the perfect recipe for disaster,” 
“Yah, honestly you fumbled this one toots,” Angel adds, absentmindedly scrolling through his phone.
“Vaggie, this isn't so bad. At least now we have solid evidence. Who knows? We actually have a fighting chance,” Charlie gives her girlfriend a comforting hug from behind. 
“I know it's short notice, and I'm sorry I'm asking for a lot, but it could help you guys immensely,” You ramble on. 
“Maybe we can sit down and look all of this over. I’ve brought some documents with me, and after possibly I could snatch Sir Pentious to go to the court meeting as well,” You start naming things like a list so fast, the words that leave your mouth are almost unintelligible. 
“Hey, maybe you should sit down. Seems like you're getting the jitters. Oh Charlie! Maybe you should brew a pot of tea, hmm?” Lucifer puts a hand on your shoulder and guides you to the couch. 
“Sorry for getting worked up about all of this, and all, I just have a lot on my plate,” you rub the head of Kiki, calming down to the vibrations of the cat's purrs.
“Yeah I could tell,” The demon holds your shaky hand gently, as if it was made of glass. 
“See, you're shaking. I'm assuming the hearing isn't the only reason you're so anxious,” 
You sigh. 
“Really, I'm fine. Don't worry about it,” You smile, and squeeze his hand.
The King slightly reddens at the touch.
Charlie enters the room with piping hot cups of tea with Vaggie, who was holding a tin of biscuits. Charlie squints at the sight of you and her dad holding hands. Instinctively, you pull away casually.
“Okay, so,” You begin to take out some papers from your bag and place them on the table. 
“Recently, St. Peter gave me receipts of who has entered Heaven in the recent weeks. Even though we know that Sir Pentious is in Heaven, we should still try to match up the dates of when he entered, and the day of extermination,” 
“It'll be good hard cold evidence, especially if we get a grab of Pentious himself…” you bite your lip. 
“We’d probably have to look around for more information… Would either of you know anything?” You turn to the three. 
Lucifer scratches his head for a moment. 
“Hmm, nothing that I could think of-” 
“I believe I could make an attempt to ask Rosie and the other Overlords, they like to be keeping an eye on everything that goes on in Hell,” The familiar nails-on-a-chalkboard voice makes you jump out of your seat, almost spilling the cups of tea on the table. 
Geez, can Alastor abstain himself from giving you a jumpscare just to make his entrance?
“Yeah, that'd be amazing! We really need all hands on deck for this,” Charlie answers for you.
“Thanks Alastor. You're so kind,” You add, just out of habit. 
“It’s no problem my dear. Anything to help out a friend,” 
Friend? Alastor isn't an enemy to you, but you barely have shared any proper conversation to consider him your friend. 
That title he used for you seemed, off, like he doesn't regard you as a friend. 
But why-? 
Oh. 
“Yeah, thanks for your kind offer Alastor, but I'm quite confident that us three have it covered. So can you please remove yourself from here? We need to concentrate,” Lucifer pipes up from beside you, a thin layer of rage decorating his tone. 
“Uhm, some extra help doesn't hurt anyone Dad, right Y/N?” 
It feels like everyone in the room is looking at you for your input. 
Thankfully, your saving grace, Niffty turns the attention to her.
“Why are all the bad boys becoming good boys?! Ugh! So lame,” She groans as she uses a brush to sweep stray crumbs from the floor.
Using this window of opportunity, you change the subject. 
“Okay, now regarding Sir Pentious, I should probably call him now…” 
“I still have the card you gave me!” Charlie takes out the card from her breast pocket, crusted with dry slime and lint.
“You keep that thing on you?” Vaggie cringes.
“Yes, and?” Charlie dials the number on the card. 
Briing rring
You hold your breath as each silent second drags on. 
“Hello? Who isss thiss?” A voice rings from the other end. 
“Sir Pentious, is that you?!” The Princess replies. 
“Charlie? Iss that you?” The voice counters. 
“Oh hi!! So as much as I want to catch up with you, I have a teeny tiny favour to ask of you…”
꧁ꕥ❂♕☻☹☻♕❂ꕥ❂♕☻☹☻♕❂ꕥ❂♕☻☹☻♕❂ꕥ❂♕☻☹☻♕❂ꕥ꧂
“Ahh, I don't know Charlie. Thiss iss a very important matter, I don't know if I could handle it,”
“Pentious, by helping us, we could be achieving big! We need to either go big or go home! I know it's a lot of you, but, pretty please?”
A crackled sigh. 
“Oh alright…”
“Aaaa thank you so much Pentious! I'd give you a hug, but, you know… Ah bye bye!”
Charlie drops the call. 
“Seems like everything's in order now. I'll see you guys tomorrow?” You stand up from the couch. 
“Yes, and Y/N?”
You turn to the Princess. 
“Yes Charlie?”
She hesitates. 
“....Thank you again, for all of this,”
“Charlie, again, it's really no problem, okay? It's literally the least I can do,” You give Charlie a hug. 
It's all you can do. 
꧁ꕥ❂♕☻☹☻♕❂ꕥ❂♕☻☹☻♕❂ꕥ❂♕☻☹☻♕❂ꕥ❂♕☻☹☻♕❂ꕥ꧂
“We are gathered here today to re-determine if sinners are able to redeem themselves via Charlie Morningstar’s Hazbin Hotel,” The Seraphim’s voice bellows from above. 
Cherubs and winners are below you, Charlie is by your side, and Emily is beside Sera, on edge.
“The plaintiff is Y/N, and the defendant is Adam, the first man. Y/N, I bring the floor to you,”
You take a deep breath and take out your notes. 
“Well, your Honour, I have receipts which show that a sinner has entered Heaven in recent weeks,” You thrust out the piece of paper, which Sera draws towards her. 
“He goes by the name ‘Sir Pentious’,” Your voice puts on a nonchalant tone, but it feels like your heart is about to stop. 
Sera reads over the piece of paper, her face as though she swallowed a particularly sour lemon. 
“Uhhhh, I call bullshit. I mean come onnnnnn,” Adam groans. 
“I mean, do you know how easy it is for her to just print that out. Don't tell me you're actually believing this?” He smirks, and gets a snicker from Lute beside him.
“Uhm actually,”Sir Peter pipes up from the stands. 
“I actually gave her that paper a while ago, if that can vouch for anything-”
“Shut up Pete,” Adam spits. 
“Order!” Sera’s feathers ruffle, and she tucks them back down.
“Unless the defendant shows indubitable evidence, I’m afraid the verdict still stands,”
“Sera no!” Emily cries.
“Emily, this is an official court meeting, one of which you aren’t apart of. If you can’t keep quiet, you would have to leave the courtroom,”
You bite your nail. You really didn’t want to pull out your winning card this early…
“May I call a witness?”
“You may,”
“Well I call Sir Pentious as my witness,” You nod towards where the cacophony of angels were.
“Well your Honour…” He hisses, his tail wagging as though alert. 
“I used to be a sinner, ass you may already know. During the lasst extermination, I wass killed in the battle… Then before I knew it, I wass up here in Heaven. That's all,” Pentious looks up at you, and you give a thumbs up along with a smile. 
“Any quesstions?” 
“No, you may sit down,” Sera starts, but a cherub pipes up from the audience. 
“What does he mean by “as you already know”? I for one didn't know about that,” 
Multiple angels, winners and Heavenborn alike, all murmur in agreement. Emily then bursts out,
“I'll tell you this. It's because Sera and I knew when Sir Pentious entered Heaven. Rather than going through the pearly gates, he appeared amongst the two of us.” 
And all Hell, (or Heaven) breaks loose.
“Silence! This meeting is adjourned,” Sera’s ringing voice brings the noise of the  populated stadium to a halt.
“Adjourned? What, why?” Charlie inadvertently voices your thoughts.
“My reasoning will not be objected,” Sera dodges the question.
“This meeting will be continued within twenty minutes,”
꧁ꕥ❂♕☻☹☻♕❂ꕥ❂♕☻☹☻♕❂ꕥ❂♕☻☹☻♕❂ꕥ❂♕☻☹☻♕❂ꕥ꧂
“Charlie, what do we do? Sera clearly doesn’t want to budge, and God knows what lies Adam is feeding her,” you  pace up and down, words leaving your mouth as quick as lightning.
“Uhh don’t panic,” Charlie puts her hands up defensively. 
“She hasn’t made a decision yet, we could- erh” She stumbles over her words,  and fumbles a small yellow item out of her pocket and puts it in your hand.
“My dad said to give it to you if you got worked up- uhm,” Charlie steps backward a bit to give you some space. 
You look at the object in your hand, which took the shape of a duck that was decorated with the signature white hat, and an apple cane in its flank.
You squeeze it and it produces a familiar tune. Your eyes widen as you remember that it was the melody  you complimented just the other day. 
At the time, it was just obligatory praise, but you were absolutely smitten by the fact that Lucifer has taken it seriously.
The dedication, into making something like this, for you is…
Charming.
Really Charming. 
“Uhhh, Are you alright?” The Princess taps her foot anxiously, waiting for your answer.
“Oh yeah!” You look up, cheeks warming.
“I really love it. Tell him as such,” your stupid face breaks into a smile despite everything.
“I will. He’d be pretty happy hearing that, especially from you,” she gives you a playful nudge.
“You know… He likes you. Like- a lot,” 
Your eyes brighten, and Charlie squeals at the sight.
“Oh, I knew it was reciprocal!” She brings you into a massive bear hug.
“Charlie- I-,”
“Oh, sorry,” She lets go.
“I was squeezing too hard, wasn’t I?”
“No, no it’s not that. It’s that well- you know I’m married,” An gravelly sigh leaves your lips.
“I think we would be better as friends,” Your throat is scratchy. Why is this so hard to say? 
“Oh,” was her reaction, only enhancing your guilt even more. She looked so remorseful, you wanted to hug her so badly and say that you were lying.
And you were.
“Excuse me?” A cherub taps your shoulder.
“The court meeting is about to resume,”
꧁ꕥ❂♕☻☹☻♕❂ꕥ❂♕☻☹☻♕❂ꕥ❂♕☻☹☻♕❂ꕥ❂♕☻☹☻♕❂ꕥ꧂
As you enter back on your podium, you see Adam whispering something into Sera’s ear. He looks at you and makes a rude gesture, which you reciprocate.
“Enough! The court is back in session. Now, I bring the defendant to speak,” 
“Ehhh yeah, anyway my point still stands. I don’t think we want some sinners cavorting around , making trouble,”
 His statement just irritates you. How could he just say something like that?
“How do you know that? Pentious has been here for a while, and I doubt he has been making any disturbance,” are you picking the low hanging fruit? Yes. Is it helping your case? Also yes.
“Uhhhh yeah, but what’s the guarantee that others won’t? Geez, you’re so gullible,” He snorts like the pig he is.
“The defendant has a point. I feel like I’ve come to a conclusion, and it still hasn’t changed from the last session. Lute, please see Princess Charlie Morningstar out. Everyone else is  dismissed,”
All the spectators leave. Sir Pentious looks back and gives you a consoling wave before taking his leave.
Lute flies over to your podium and a portal opens behind Charlie.
“What? No!” You and Emily shout in unison. The General roughly grabs the princess by the arm and drags her through the threshold.
 Horns protrude from Charlie’s head, trying to resist the Angel’s force. More exterminators appear, almost magically and with one final push, the Demon princess is hauled through the portal.
“Charlie, NO!” You outstretch your hand, but it’s too late. The gateway closed with a whoosh sound.
“Now, was that really necessary?” You stare daggers at Sera, Lute and Adam.
“It had to be done,” was her response.
“Also, Sera, you said you wanted to talk to Y/n about something,” The first man’s tone is sinister, and is putting you on edge. 
“Oh, yes. Thank you for the reminder. Well, Mrs. Y/N, I ban you from travelling to Hell without a permit,”
“What, why?!” Your heart is in your throat.
“Uhh, coz I don’t want you there. D'you know how bad it'll look on me if I can’t control my wife?!” 
Sera puts her fingers between her eyes.
“Ahem, what Adam is trying to say is that, you clearly aren’t thinking of the consequences all of this may have. Imagine the state of Heaven if we just let any riff-raff in,”
You let out a short breath in shock. That was it. Game over.
“Unbelievable,” 
“Y/N, WAIT!-” Emily tries to fly to your podium
She was met with a slammed door in her face.
꧁🥀☽💫✶♛🐣♕✶💫☾🥀꧂
Word count- 3,111
Taglist:
@dionysusismypatrongod
@glowymxxn
@froggybich
@pea-shooter-brain
@hyperkaiperrose
@relatedsoda
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yanderelmk · 1 year
Note
It's my birthday today 😊🎂
How do various yanderes celebrate their darling's birthday?
~💜💫
Oh my gosh happy birthday!! :D For the sake of not running out of space Imma group this together: ☀️MONKEY MEN🌑: They tried to make you a birthday cake...thing is neither of them know how to bake. They had to set their bitterness aside (or- well, they tried to) and the result was Wukong trying to distract you while Macaque scrambled around trying to find you something, even sending out his clones so he could sweep multiple stores at once (while pocketing a few shiny things for himself b/c mfer is a magpie). 🚦TRAFFIC LIGHT TRIO🚦: Mei got you a gift weeks in advance, she stays on top of birthdays. Same for Red Son! MK however didn't remember until the night before because ADHD is a bitch, but he likely ended up drawing a bunch of pictures of you, him, Red Son, and Mei. Mei also has a cake ready b/c she's The Best Ever. The trio's general vibe is just "BFFs 5ever because it's longer than 4" and everyone they care about is given the same treatment. 📖FREE NOODLES🍜: Pigsy is gonna be cookin' up a whole-ass STORM!! All of your favorite foods will be made, and breakfast is definitely served in bed. Dinner's gonna be a whole feast with the cake made extra special. Tang's the type of guy that follows "It's your birthday, so whatever you say goes!" He'll be fully open to trying out something new, and his gift is going to relate to a really niche subject that he knows you absolutely adore. It's likely he's done research to make sure he got the gift just right! 🕷️SPIDER DEMONS🕸️: These four are so wild it's funny. Spider Queen probably used her silk to make you a really fancy outfit, Syntax (who had your birthday set up as a reminder on his phone) probably is gonna give you some kind of drone that can help you out with mundane stuff (you get to name it). Goliath tried to make something, but whatever it is it's gonna be messy...he did his best. Huntsman? Deadass he probably went to go hunt your favorite animal so he could stuff it. If your favorite animal isn't in the area or it's a fictional one catch this extra-ass motherfucker carving a big-ass statue of it.
They had these gifts prepared. They knew your birthday was coming. They still all forgot until the actual day/the night before, for various reasons. Hey, at least the gifts are well-made. ☠️BONE DUO👻: Both the Lady Bone Demon and the Mayor are going to appear on your doorstep at midnight. They have a full day planned with ways to celebrate your birthday and 'no' is not an option. You will be spoiled!! The Mayor's got enough money to take you out in style, probably in his limo to fancy restaurants, most likely one of those rotating ones. The gifts will be exactly what you need, even if you didn't know you needed it yet. Even if it seems odd at first, best to just go along with it. 🪷CELESTIAL SQUAD🌙: Chang'e has a gigantic cake prepared, most likely one layer for each year of your life. She's been working on this for forever!! Nezha helped her prepare a big party on the moon for you. Both of them are likely to gift you presents of Celestial origins (blessed jewelry that protects you from demonic possession, or a very rare book). They might have lost count of their own ages, but they understand how important birthdays are to some people. 🦁THE🐘BROTHERHOOD🦅: They're completely unfamiliar with how mortals celebrate birthdays, but they're going to do their best. Cake? OK sure they can make one (it looks god awful). Presents? Surely any mortal would appreciate dangerous weapons and armor (it's horribly wrapped)! With the whole "listen to the birthday person" thing they might take it too literally. Like if you say "Let's hit the road" they are going to demolish that goddamn road b/c you said to and are the birthday person. Your wishes must be followed. They're trying they really are.
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the-golden-comet · 8 days
Text
✨🥊OC Fight Tag 🥊✨
Thank you for the tags, @willtheweaver here @tragedycoded here, @illarian-rambling here, and @sableglass here!! Let’s dive right into it with the main pair from Peter Hart 💛💫✨
Peter Hart
Health: 10
Strength: 9
Speed: 6
Armor: 8
Cunning: 10
Special Attack: “Hey, what’s that?”— distracts the target to swipe money and drain a portion of opponent SP meter. Fully depletes own meter to use. Each gold swiped adds +0.5 to all stats until the end of the round. Caps at 13.
Weakness: Shoulder/face shots
Idle animation: one hand on hip, other loosely at side. Occasionally takes out flintlock and twirls with embellishments, before putting it back in the holster. Secondary animation, grins as a sun sparkle glints off his teeth.
Benjamin
Health: 5
Strength: 6
Speed: 10
Armor: 4
Cunning: 6
Special Attack: “Lucky Shot”— Upon firing his gun, has a 25% chance to crit with damage equaling 200% of his current strength. Uses half SP meter to use. Strength gradually increases by intervals of 0.5 for every 15 seconds in the current round. Resets at the end of each round.
Weakness: Legs/Leg sweeps
Idle animation: Arms crossed, uses one hand to occasionally flip loose strand of hair away from face. Resting bitch face, perpetually looks pissed off. Taps foot impatiently if no input after 10 seconds.
That was fun! I’m going to (gently, no pressure) tag: @autism-purgatory , @words-after-midnight , @wyked-ao3 , @gioiaalbanoart , @alinacapellabooks , @quillswriting , @paeliae-occasionally , @kaylinalexanderbooks , @drchenquill , @honeybewrites , @somethingclevermahogony , @oliolioxenfreewrites , @lychhiker-writes , @mysticstarlightduck , @houseplantblank , @thecomfywriter , @finickyfelix , @thatuselesshuman , @lavender-gloom , @smellyrottentrees , @worlds-tallest-fairy , @rhikasa , @aintgonnatakethis , @topazadine , @ath3alin , @avaseofpeonies , @theverumproject , @cowboybrunch , @jev-urisk , @amielbjacobs , @mundanemoongirl , @minamaybe , @leahnardo-da-veggie , @inadequatecowboy , @rotting-moon-writes , @saturnine-saturneight , +open tag! ✨
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sunb1eeder · 9 days
Text
HEY YOU, 🎃🕷️SPOOKY LIL' SLUT🎃🕸️! IT'S 🩸FREAKY FRIDAY🩸, AKA 😈FRIDAY THE THIRST-TEENTH😈, YOU ALREADY KNOW WHAT TIME IT IS—TIME TO LET THAT BAD LUCK 🍆🪓🍆 BEND YOU OVER AND WRECK YOUR WEEKEND, YOU BUSTED BROKEN MIRROR BITCH🪞🔪😈. BACK IN THE DAY, WITCHES🧙🏾‍♀️🪄✨💫 AND COCK-STARVED GOBLINS🧛‍♂️🦇🍆 WERE OUT HERE HEXING HUSBANDS💍🔮🕯️👻 AND STEALING BIG DEMON DICKS FROM HELL👹🔥🍑😈. IF YOU DON’T SEND THIS TO 1️⃣3️⃣ OF YOUR TRASHIEST HAUNTED HOES👠👻🦇💀🦴, GET READY TO SWALLOW 👅7️⃣ YEARS OF SOFT DICK 🍆😭AND ZERO ORGASMS💀😵‍💫
GET 6️⃣ BACK AND YOU’RE A BASIC-ASS CRYSTAL SLUT🔮🌙✨💫 WITH A CURSED COOCHIE🍑🌚🕳️🕸️. GET 1️⃣0️⃣ BACK AND YOU’RE A LADDER-LICKING FREAK🪜. GET ALL 1️⃣3️⃣ AND YOU’RE THE BADDEST LUCK-SUCKING HOE👑🍆👅🕯️, WITH BLESSED BUSSY POWERS THAT KEEP YOU GAGGING ON GHOST COCK 🍆👻💀💦🕳️ FOR ETERNITY🕯️🔮🦇🖤.
HAPPY 🕯️🕸️FUCKED UP FRIDAY THE 13TH🕯️⚡️🕸️🎃, AND DON’T FORGET: IF YOU AIN’T BREAKING MIRRORS🪞🪴🌿🌙 AND SUCKING THAT UNLUCKY DICK🍆🌩️🌀🌪️, ARE YOU EVEN A FREAKY HOE? GO OUT THERE AND FUCK WITH THE DARK MAGIC🌑🔮🦇🖤, YOU TRAGIC SLUT💀🖤🌙
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thatdeadaquarius · 2 years
Note
With your language AU, I remember watching a video about a guy speaking angrily nonesense in an Indian accent and people thinking he was very angry. Imagine this as the Creator speaks angry gibberish to people and they just assume that the Creator is cursing them or something. (Or like when they speak gibberish to babies and everyone's like, "Aw the Creator is teaching that baby their divine language")
*AUDIENCE DRAMATICALLY GASPS.
✨️I look pretty good for a dead bitch✨️
She's alivveee!!!
Whats up i almost passed away from sheer academic workload, but im not in the ground yet 🥰 And with drafts outta my ass! :D
Hope yall ready for ur regularly scheduled Bullshit Genshin Sagau <3
SANDBEES THATS SUCH A GOOD USERNAME & ALSO SORRY I ANSWERED THIS SO FUCKING LATE JESUSSSSS 💀💀💀
Tumblr media
SORRY ABT THE POLL I CANT BELIEVE I COULDNT FIGURE OUT HOW TO DELETE IT IM FUCKING CRYING I WOULD DO THIS-
Well at least i can do polls thru this in the future?? Idk tumblr is ass so we'll see how this accidental test works out...
So these were the first thngs i thought of and its not super long bc ASKERS R GENIUSES OKAY
SOMTIMES I JUST WANNA PROFUSELY THANK U GUYS AS A REPLY FOR SHARING WITH THE CLASS THRU MY BLOG 💖💘💫
Saw the gif and couldnt help but think this is how ppl like Alhaitham or Diluc would react to u "speaking ur langauge"
"Our langauage" aka being a SIM 💀
Stop Albedo would ask you to teach him ur lang/grammar rules 😭
What u gonna do when Zhongli asks you to teach him some words-
OH NO
NO DONT PASS ON YOUR BULLSHIT LMAO
U GIVING ZHONGLI SOME STUPID SIM WORD LIKE
Your ass: "GIGGLABAH means beautiful :) "✨️
Zhongli: "Oh thank you, how different from our own version, so excited sounding..."
You walk by him strolling the harbor and he just smiles at you and says
"You look gigglabah today my liege."
HIS REGAL FACE AND FANCY WALK WITH HIS HAND BEHIND HIS BACK AND EVERYTHING
(honestly ppl paint him as oblivious but he kinda seemed like the type of bastard who seems like he's not aware but sometimes he secretly knows the truth, he's just getting too much amusement out of it to stop doing it, LOL he does shit like the above to see YOUR reaction- LMAO)
You're a maniac pls tell me u dont pass on simlish to all the serious characters-
XIAO WOULD SECRETLY THINK IT SOUNDS GOOFY BUT WANT TO BE INVOLVED BC ITS YOU ANYWAY LMAO
SO HE'S JUST SLIGHTLY SQUIRMING AND GETTIN PINK EVERYTIME HE SAYS A STUPID SIM WORD BC HE FEELS LIKE A GOOF HAHA
(& he's not the only one, others too like Kaveh, YELAN, Ningguang, Nahida, DILUC, AYAKA LMAO-)
Some ppl i could see taking ur gibberish bullshittery and whether they believe its real or not is irrelevant bc theyre using it anyway-
And i dont mean in a good way 😭
LIKE IM THINKING OF VENTI.
CRAZY BARD INCLUDING SIMLISH ASS GIBBERISH WORDS IN HIS SONGS BC OF YOU
"Be cheerful like the hugkukie,
and may your cup never leaky!"
And Diluc loves you.
Really he does, deeper than he thinks-
But his eye is twitching LMAOO
(Ok but if you did like multiple of these language shenanigans thruout the asks ive gotten, Kaeya would literally grow so fond of you and associate you with goofy funny shit that makes him laugh so hard that everytime he sees you he automatically is beaming with a smile, or trying to supress a warm grin- this got away from me but its 1:44am for me rn so i would love a smiley Kaeya rn -)
Speaking language bs I have my 2nd oral exam for spanish tomorrow, pls send whatever good vibes u got and i am also really open to prayers from any religion as well. sobs
Hope anyone got any enjoyment out of my response bc tbh the ask is what rlly matters to me atp lmao
Until the next shenanigan-
Safe travels,
💀♒️
♡the beloveds mwah ♡
@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist
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