#🐳anon!!

[carbonfiction]

i’m a resident jean hater because she’s really not all that (she makes me insecure as hell because she’s tall and slim and i’m short and just a liiiittle bit stout) and plus she only has that hot demure boring energy like wheres the fun in that? boring ahh hell😹plus she’s got a fake ass MD. would logan immediately lose interest in her the second charles hires the new young social studies teacher that prances in with her big framed specs, bouncy fat rack curls and nervous disheveled bubbly personality? she has so many facts on the top of her head from all the wars he fought and what?? he also sees her in the lab??? she has a plant mutation and she dabbles in biology???? AND she was in law school????? so she’s got a mouth on her… and when he finds out by eavesdropping that she’s a virgin and a squirter one night that the girls all confess secrets he loses it, completely tuning out jean’s confessions. he wants to ruin that smart girl 🐱 so bad.

can i please take the 🐳 emoji as an anon because this is my third ask and i’m both the bathtub and glasses anon i LOVE to yap

DEAR ANNNONNN HELLOO!! god im so sorry this took so long to reply to🥲 but you ABSOLUTELY can have🐳!!!

Honest that is so real as a fellow stout girlie (despite being on the slightly taller end)

Personally I just could never get into movie jean for a litany of reasons; i was and still am so much more of a storm and rogue kinda girl. And Especially within dynamics w logan; storm as a relationship interest is everything to me. (Ill never forget or forgive for what they took from us dofp stormverine kiss getting cut)

But logan and a fairly 'innocent' mouthy smart girl??? Oh that man is following like a puppy. He his obsessed.

I feel like he would love a smart girl so much. Theres just something so alluring about someone so confident in their knowledge and skills. not to mention the cocky twang of pride that threads through him whenever he sees you correct someone on a piece of info; never condisending but explaining the actual fact to who whomever got confused. (likely poor scott which instantly wins you extra brownie points bc you?? Gorgeous and smart girl happily correcting scott on a mistake??? His knees are buckled)

But there issss another perk of him having a smart, inexperienced girl.. And thats when he can turn his smart, headstrong princess all dumb.

When simple touches from his fingers, tongue and eventually, cock can all change you from chatty, brainy and sometimes even a little bratty into a babbling, brainless mess soaking through his sheets.

Getting to finally fuck the brains right out of his cleverest girls pretty head by way of her tight puffy cunt? Truly his favorite thing at the end of a long day.

(I rambled my way through this im so sorry- is it even cohesive idk?? but i do have manymanymany thoughts on smart girl reader that i might have to expand on at some stage..)

[yelenasdiary]

What about something with Yelena dating reader and reader is a "cat girl", like, she loves cats so much and has 4 and yelena didn't know this till they were already dating ~ 🐳

Adorable Cat Lady

Pairing: Yelena Belova x Fem! Reader

Summary: You have Yelena over for dinner one your fourth date to which she finds out a new fact about you. 

Fluff

Warnings: None | 1K

Translations: Detka (baby),

AC: Thank you for sending this!! I decided to use this as a little shout out to my own cat, Mazda, who does make an appearance in this! I hope you enjoy! x 

You had just turned the store off when Yelena knocked softly on your front door. It was officially your fourth date with the ex-widow, and you had offered to cook for her instead of going out. As much as you felt more comfortable in a public setting, you soon realized just how much more of Yelena you wanted to get to know and what better way to do that than over a cooked meal in a place a little more quieter than a restaurant?

“You made it!” You smiled at the blonde, “I was starting to think you might have gotten lost in the neighbourhood” you added teasingly. Yelena chuckled, “We have these cool things called GPS’s now, if you didn’t already know” she replied making you laugh, “very funny! Please come in” you replied, opening the door more for her. 

“I got you these, I wasn’t sure what to bring” she said, handing you some flowers and a bag of your favorite potato chips. You took them kindly, thanking her by placing a soft kiss on her cheek, “that’s very sweet of you, thank you” you replied softly. 

You lead Yelena into your home, giving her a little tour of your small home before returning to the dining room. “I’ve cooked your favourite, but with a little twist!” You said happily. 

“A twist?” Yelena questioned, taking off her coat and neatly hanging it over the back of her chair. “Let’s just say I hope you like spicy food” you hinted, giving her a cheeky smirk just as your eldest cat jumped up onto the chair you had just pulled out for yourself. 

“Woah! You didn’t tell me you had a cat” Yelena said, looking up at you. 

“Oh, I have four! This is Misty, she’s my eldest. Then there is Patches, Zuzu and Milo” you replied proudly, “they’re all rescue cats” you added. Yelena smiled softly, “I can’t believe I had to wait until our fourth dated for you to tell me this” 

“I didn’t want you to think I was some crazy cat lady” you replied, chuckling. “I’ll be right back, I’ll feed them and then I can dish up our dinner” you added with another smile before dashing off to the kitchen. The sound of you opening a can of cat food soon had the other three of your cats running towards the kitchen, Misty following as you began to dish up their food. 

While Yelena waited, she soon noticed just how much you loved cats, the two empty classes on the table had small cat paw prints printed on them, you had a few photos of your cats in frames on the wall, on the small display cabinet that Yelena could see; there was some small cat merchandise like items sitting proudly. She smiled to herself before she noticed you walking by the kitchen and into the living room, opening up the window and placing a small plate of cat food on the bench. 

“You have a fifth cat I don’t know about?” Yelena asked sarcastically. 

“No, I just like to feed the neighbour’s cat a little treat, her name is Mazda” you replied before making your way back to the kitchen. You dished up the hot meal you had just spent the last couple of hours making before returning to the dining room and placing a plate in front of Yelena. 

“Thank you, adorable little cat lady” the blonde smiled making you chuckle, “you’re welcome little miss smart arse! I hope you like it, its one-pot chilli mac and cheese” you replied before taking a seat across from her. “Detka, I’m Russian. I drink straight vodka and not once have I thought about adding chilli to my mac and cheese! You’re a genius!” She complimented. 

“I’ve never made it before, so I hope it’s good” you smiled softly before the two of you dug in. 

After dinner and the countless compliments Yelena gave you on your cooking, you introduced her to your other three cats. Zuzu was a little more shy than the others and took a few moments to warm up to Yelena but once she did, she didn’t leave Yelena’s side. 

“Which one did you rescue first?” Yelena asked with Zuzu in her lap. 

“Zuzu actually! She was a year old when I adopted her, then a week later I adopted Patches. She’s a little older than Zuzu but they were good together, played all the time! Made an absolute mess of my house when I wasn’t home!” You replied, remembering the time the two cats were younger. “Then I got a call from a friend who works at a shelter, and she said that Misty was on basically on her last life, I couldn’t say no. So, I brought her home and she quickly became a mother figure to Zuzu and Patches. Then came Milo, my shy baby” you added, smiling softly. 

“And the stray outside? You haven’t adopted that one yet?” Yelena questioned making you chuckle, “Mazda isn’t a stray, she lives next door, I just love giving her a treat every night” you replied. 

“Did you name her after the car or?” 

You shook your head, “no, that was the owner. Not sure why though but it suits her”

“Honestly, I knew you had cats, I would’ve taken you to the cat café for our first date” Yelena smiled softly, “and if you had of done that, I fear I may have scared you off with not wanting to leave the kitty’s!” You joked, the two of you laughing afterwards. 

“Would you say these cutie would give the grand approval for me to take you to the movies on Saturday?” Yelena asked. You instantly fell for her even more as she didn’t treat your cats are just pets but pets that are your family. “You may need to butter Milo up” you joked. 

Yelena chuckled once more, “well, Milo, my new found friend, we need to have a little chat” she replied, giving you a playful wink.

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[hyukalyptus]

saw your reblog about kissing along the happy trail and let out a great sigh bc i could never do that to them 😔

but yeah i believe in kai happy trail and perhaps also beomgyu???

idk if you’ve done this before but what are your hairy TXT hc’s? like where do u think their body hair is most…evident? (does that make sense omg i hope it does!!)

- 🐳

okay girlie let's get into it,, i havent given it like, dedicated thought and i dont have strong opinions developed, other than i love the thought of hairy!txt lmao so i will try to be consistent with my thoughts ehehehe.

cw. lots of hair talk ahead. mentions of sex in kai's, balls, bjs.

so obviously theyve all got pelvic pubes right ? and i know we dont see a lot of their hair but this is if they don't shave/laser it off lmfao. also none of this is real im just being weird as hell about hair.

yeonjun- i think his armpit hair is like a long line ig? instead of it being like a clump in the middle, its like in a line lmao, idk how to explain it BUT i bring treats (sfw link to yj armpit hair crumbs!! its an old pic tho) and i know he shaved his face in that vlog but i feel like he was just doin that to look hot lmao, i dont think he has super intense facial hair tbh. other than that, i think he's typically got the sexiest happy trail ever!! and what i mean by that, is that i dont think his tummy is super hairy, so his happy trail is a pretty distinct line. and its dark and is a literally happy trail lmfao.

soobin- he's hairy!!! and i will not be silenced any longer. thats why he looks so baby is bc that man is meant to have hair. not a ton though. bushy armpit hair, even a little hairy chested i think. like a pretty wide line down the middle of his chest and it spreads over his pecks a little. hairy legs!! >< ugh imagine laying on his slightly hairy chest and rubbin his 5 oclock shadow, just snugglin and cozy wozy <3

beomgyu- seems to be the most facially hairy lol. i could see him having a pretty substantial beard. and a hairy tummy for sure. i know thats not a look for beomie but those are my thoughts lol

taehyun- oooohhh i think his arms and legs are pretty hairy. so rn i dont think he's as muscular as he'd like to be bc if youre super muscley and a dancer, it could cause injuries easier bc of flexibility SO anyway, all that to say, i think when he's retired he's gonna get all muscley and his arms and legs are gonna be all hairy and delicious :p

kai- ok y'all thought i yapped about yj and soob's hair too much well.....i could talk about hairy kai for hours and hours. i think he's the hairiest by far !! omfg. hairy chest and hairy tummy. FUCK im giggling too much. thinking about post-sex kai, sweaty and out of breath, laying on his hairy chest while y'all catch ur breath. thinking about his hairy arms wrapping around ur waist to hug you. i know this is so random, but thinking about rubbing sunscreen into his skin for him at the beach. eheheh. getting on ur knees for him, kissing down his tummy on ur way down AH, playin with his bush before playing with his balls before suckin his dick LOL. but frfr never not thinking about laying on kai's hairy chest post-sex lmfao.

[hmshermitcraft]

Xisuma is Grians dad,

He’s the type of dad to throw in real, dad-dad jokes, that just make Grian grimace instead of laugh, but Xisuma doesn’t mind it— those jokes made Grian laugh when he was 6.

After the events of YHS though, being the absolute behemoth of a voidwalker he is, made sure to banish Sam into the oblivion, since at the end of the day, Xisuma’s son is his best accomplishment ever.

And anyone willing to try and hurt his son will meet a real painful end..

-🐳

It caused him a lot of anxiety, introducing Grian to the hermits. All of them are people he cares about very much, he'd hate for this to force him to choose sides.

And when Grian starts to flirt with a few of the hermits, X has to remind himself that it's okay. Grian can handle himself. He gets to watch the people he cares about a lot find love with each other.

[hyunsvngs]

soft sex w seungmin :( yeah he might tease u a lil still (it’s kim seungmin after all) but it’s sooo soft and comforting :( him giggling while kissing u, rubbing his warm hands up n down ur sides …. just soft n silly. and the aftercare hhnnnnnnfjdjd omg what if i cry :(

-🐳 anon

seungmin would love to do this. you can't have hard rough sex all the time!! UR SORE!!

"nice and slow, baby, nice and slow," seungmin says. his breath is warm against your neck, lips pursing to press a soft kiss into your skin. his cock is solid inside of you, but you're sore from the night before, and he knows it. he knows it, but he knows you need him too - this is the only way. "feels good? not hurting?"

you nod, grinning. "'s good, seungie. thank you."

seungmin chuckles, running his hands up your thighs. it tickles you slightly and makes you giggle, wiggling away from his touch.

"we'll go slow. slow and soft, yeah?" he's quieter this time, and you wrap your arms around his broad shoulders, fully naked and skin soft against yours. he lets his chest brush against yours, and then he's moving, soft grinds of his hips that make you sigh in bliss.

"yeah, just like that," you affirm, and he kisses your hairline in response. the lights are dim in your bedroom, one singular lamp casting a soft glow over his features. you can just about make out his soft smile, puppy-dog eyes and the way his jaw clenches at a particularly long thrust. you coo when he leans down, forearms either side of your head for purchase, allowing him to thrust a little deeper. "god, i'll cum in no time, minnie."

"good," he grins, kissing your forehead. "my special thing. cum whenever you want, baby."

[play-rough]

author, heyyyy!!! how are you doing?

was rereading classification au and baby dazai likes it when chuuya picks something to watch in case he himself will pick something that may turn out scary..

what happens if the baby actually picks something to watch someday and it actually turns out really scary? 👀

~ 🐳

I know some people were scared by the parents turning into pigs in spirited away, so it would probably be a situation like that where something not meant to be scary freaks him out 😭 bc tbh Chuuya would never let him pick anything intentionally scary lmao

But anyways, Dazai would probably be really embarrassed about being scared, and try to just brave it. He’d squish Fishie harder and maybe start shutting his eyes and looking away from the tv, until Chuuya notices he’s basically cowering away 😭🩵

I hope you’ve been well, whale anon 🩵🩵

[lillyspeakz]

enjoy taunt lyrics while i read a wilbuh x reader book its in the reading list btwwww

She's always asking, "Am I alright?" As if auspicious or in my pint I'll find the answer or a good night Thank God the time is short And, yes, you always do that one thing When you wrinkle up the nose bridge I'm tryna figure out what that meant I took it as a taunt Remember way back then in school? Oh, did anybody ever say no to you? Whoa Did anybody ever say no to you? Whoa And I don't think I have a clue 'Cause, well, did anybody ever say no to you? Whoa Did anybody ever say no to you? Whoa You're always tryna leave the table Phone calls, toilet breaks, unstable And don't you think that we can all tell? You're insecure, you're insecure I guess I always do that one thing When I get too drunk and jump in To figure out what makes your brain tick I'm a listener, I'm a listener Remember way back then in school? 'Cause well, did anybody ever say no to you? Whoa Did anybody ever say no to you? Whoa But I don't think I have a clue 'Cause, well, does anybody ever say no to you? Whoa Does anybody ever say no to you? Whoa Woo And I don't think so 'Cause I don't think so Forget the number for the cab call As you're dashing out the front door You claim to try to dodge the catcalls Thank God the time is short And, yes, you always do that one thing 'Cause when you throw and drench me under your drink I'm tryna figure out what that means I took it as a taunt

-🐳

Bro- taunt is superior sorry not sorry.

[dontmakemeright]

Fuuuuuck this blog does something to me, im sitting here hard and squirmy. The fact that my mind wondered if you'd actually take me on as a sub. Holy hell.-🐳

Hmmm, that's how I like my cute subs. Getting hard just reading about what horny stuff goes on in my head. And of course, love. You seem to be fucking sweet ~

[sqtorux]

rowlets a pokémon ! basically an owl

search him up he's literally adorable i'm gonna squish him

-🐳

im tearing up i didn't watch all of pokemon i feel like im committing a crime

such a cutie !!

[webslingingslasher]

https://www.instagram.com/reel/C-gZOBJvbL3/?igsh=MWRlanpkOWVzbGV6Yw==

Peter if someone makes him go to a ballet class ? or am I totally off ?? 😭

The “I love Star Wars” really sold it for me.

Also, is Peter a dog or cat person ????

-🐳

THE DOG PICS HAVE ME SCREAMINGGGGGGGG PLEASE THIS IS MY KIND OF HUMOR 😭

nerdy!peter core fr.

i think peter loves both! he loves how happy and sweet dogs are, he makes sure to pet everyone he sees!!! but he also thinks they are time consuming and they require quite a bit of attention so he wants a dog but somewhere down the line (when he gets a house)

he loves cats bc they are adorable and fluffy, they're easier to manage and they're self sufficient! he likes being able to come home and cuddle a cute kitty for a few minutes but doesn't always have an animal laying on him like a dog would. 

[mochinomnoms]

Confession anon or 🐳 if that's ok

Yuu is just so different and kinda generic if I'm being honest. Best example is when floyd laughs the first time. Bitch I'm 5 nothen and I've delt with fuckers kinda like them. Irl guy was way more of a bully than the twins but still. My adhd/autistic ass would have busted a gut with him! His laughs are soooooo cute and gave me the crazy smile first time I heard it. And as stated before, I. Am. SHORT! I get called shrimp and shrimpy all the time already by folks and I would have blown a damned gasket if I get stuck with that nickname again! Personly I see Yuu as OC or somethin like that. No problem with folks who don't I just had to get it off mu chest lol

The generic thing is probably intentional so people can imagine themselves as Yuu, otherwise they'd be just another character, like what they're doing in the light novel and in the mangas. There's nothing wrong with viewing Yuu as an oc, but anything i write on here is going to have Yuu=Reader if that's something might want to keep in mind if it bothers you

[yelenasdiary]

Hii, can I request something like Reader is friends with Florence or Yelena (you can choose) and they were traveling for work and had to spend like a week in Las Vegas, and one night they got super drunk and got married to each other. Like, how they would react to waking up the next morning with a ring on their finger (bonus points if they're naked lol).

I just love your writing so much 💙 but don't feel pressured to write it if you don't want to ~ 🐳

Waking Up In Vegas

Pairing: Yelena Belova x Fem! Reader

Summary: When Kate throws a party for an undercover mission, it opens the door to you and Yelena to have a little fun, maybe a little too much fun…

Fluff? Idk, maybe more comfort?

Warnings: Enemies to loves kind of vibe?, Mentions of drinking, Mentions of gambling, language warning, suggestive themes, Mentions of being sick & hung over | 1.9K

AC: I love this idea; I am also a little biased because I enjoyed the movie lmao, but I hope you enjoy this & thank you for sending it! x

"Remember, don't blow this!" Kate's voice came through to your earpiece. You couldn't help but roll your eyes at your friend's reminder, "focus on your mission, bishop" you replied before taking a sip of your drink. Kate's plan was to lure her target by throwing a small party at a casino and to your surprise she was able to get Yelena to help her out, considering that Yelena hated the idea of being an Avenger of any kind. The blonde took a seat next to you at the bar, sighing when you looked over to her. 

"I'm surprised to see you here" you said under your breath just so she could hear. 

"It seems that Kate Bishop needed some real help" she replied, downing a shot of vodka the minute the bartender walked away. You chuckled, "it's always a pleasure to see you, Belova" you replied. You could say that you and Yelena were never really the best of friends, she hated everything you stood for almost and you didn't understand why she didn't want to put her widow skills into helping the world. Although she always told you that she was helping the world another way, you just assumed she hated working in a team. 

"I could say the same about you, but it never is a pleasure" Yelena replied, reaching over the bar and grabbing an entire bottle of vodka. "Hey!" The bartender called out, rushing over to the blonde. "Calm down, I was going to pay" Yelena said, her thick accent making it clear to the man behind the bar that she was probably somebody not to mess with. She placed some money on the bar which he took with an eye roll and watched as Yelena popped the lid off and poured herself another drink. 

"Isn't that a waste of money for you? I mean, does the vodka even affect you at all?" you asked. Yelena looked up at you and chuckled, "it does, eventually. It just means I get to drink more than you can before making a fool of myself" 

You rolled your eyes at her sarcasm before you pulled out a small bottle and placed it on the bar, "maybe you should try this" you said. 

"What would that be?" Yelena asked. 

"Asgardian Ale" you replied confidently. Yelena raised a brow, "you mean what the gods drink?" She questioned. You nodded as you downed what was left of your drink and began to pour some Ale into your glass. With a quick flick of her wrist, Yelena's shot glass slid down to you. 

"You're not one for manners, are you?" You cocked a brow. 

"You offered me a drink, I'll thank you when that glass is back in my hand" 

This was what it was always like for you two, bickering with one another. "Guys your earpieces are still on" Kate's voice rang through the small device in your right ear, "do you both still have eyes on the target?" She asked. You poured Yelena a shot of the strong ale and slid it back down to you, "he hasn't moved an inch" you informed Kate.

"Still gambling away those stolen millions" Yelena added. 

"Just, stay focused!" Kate said. 

"Looks like we're in for a long night, Belova" you turned slightly to face Yelena, drink in hand as you slightly raised it up. Yelena sighed in agreement before clinking her glass with yours. She threw the drink down the back of her throat like it was nothing, you couldn't help but chuckle before taking a mouthful of your drink. 

——

The loud banging on the hotel door woke Yelena, she groaned to herself as she slowly sat up. Her eyes barely staying awake, her head throbbing with a headache, the consistent knocking wasn't helping. She looked to her left and suddenly her eyes stopped fighting the need to be closed. There you lay, naked with the bed sheet barely covering you, peacefully sleeping. Yelena's eyes dropped to her own body before her mind went wild trying to remember the events of last night. 

"Yelena! Open the door!" She heard Kate's call bringing her thoughts back. Yelena stumbled out of bed, grabbing the first two pieces of clothing she saw as she dressed herself as she made her way to the door. 

"Kate Bishop, do you know how to be quiet when somebody is hung over?" Yelena groaned. Kate cocked a brow, "hung over? You? Really?" She questioned. 

"What do you want Kate Bishop?" Yelena asked sternly. 

"Come on, it's been like what? 5 years and you're still calling me by my full name?" 

"It's been 3 and yes" Yelena replied. 

"Right. Well, I just wanted to come by and thank you for the help last night, I know you hate all this Avenger business but it was much appreciated" Kate smiled. Yelena frowned, wondering how somebody could be so cheerful and happy so early in the morning. "You should probably have a shower, might help with the hang over" the archer added. 

"You're welcome, I'm going to take that shower now" Yelena replied, "I'll see you later Kate Bishop" she added before closing the door. 

Her head was pounding more than before, she'd never felt such a strong hangover before she thought as she made her way back to the bedroom. You hadn't moved a muscle which amazed Yelena considering she believed that Kate had probably woken up a few guests on the floor. Before Yelena knew it, she was back in bed and everything was black once more, peace and quiet to sleep off her headache. 

By the time you slowly began to wake up it was already a little after midday, you didn't drink near as much as Yelena, but you drank enough to feel your stomach turning as you slowly sat up, rubbing the sleep from your eyes. It took a second for you to notice the blonde sleeping beside you, your eyes widened when you noticed it was Yelena.

"Oh fuck!" You mumbled to yourself as you pulled the bed sheet over your naked body, "Yelena!" You nudged her. "Wake up!" You said, nudging her a little harder. 

"Mmm" she mumbled as she stirred. Annoyed with her lack of concern, you kicked her out of bed. 

"What was that for?!" Yelena spat as she picked herself up off the floor, "oh I don't know, maybe because I'm naked in your bed in your hotel room?" You snapped, "what the hell happened last night?" You asked, running one hand through your hair only for it to get caught in your locks. 

"All I remember is drinking a shot of that Asgardian Ale and the next thing I know; I'm waking up to Kate Bishop banging on the door and you kicking me out of bed!" Yelena explained. 

"Oh no" you mumbled after finally untangling your hand from your hair. A small silver band on your ring finger only added to the list of worries, you looked up at Yelena who was also looking at a similar ring on her ring finger. "Please tell me we didn't get married" you said. 

"Don't be stupid, we weren't that drunk" Yelena replied, "right?" She added unsurely when she noticed the ring on her finger. You rolled your eyes as you threw your head back onto the pillow, "this cannot be happening right now" you sighed as you covered your face with your hands. The room became silent, you tried your best to rack your brain for any memories of last night but like Yelena you couldn't remember anything after the two of you shared a couple of Thor's drink. 

Yelena wandered into the bathroom, splashing cold water on her face to keep her from needing extra sleep. "I will never trust you with alcohol again" you heard her say as she made her way back to the bedroom. Slowly, you sat back up and placed your feet on the floor. The bed sheet still wrapped around you as you scanned the room to find your clothing only to find it scattered from the living room to the bedroom. "I can't believe you did trust me" you muttered in reply, walking by her and locking yourself in the bathroom. "Look where that got me" Yelena replied.

----

The evaluator dinged as the doors began to slide open, both you and Yelena were greeted with a very happy, to happy, Kate Bishop with a smile from ear to ear she couldn't help hiding the chuckle that she let out as the two of you walked towards her. 

"What's so funny?" You asked with a cocked brow. After having a shower and returning to your own room to change into fresh clothes, you felt a little better, but a good meal was going to make you feel much better. Kate invited you both to the buffet for lunch in the lobby, Yelena's head still throbbing, not as much as earlier but enough for her to keep her shades on. 

"Just the two of you and the fun you both hide" Kate replied cheekily. 

"Fun?" Yelena questioned. Kate nodded, "you both have no idea what happened last night, do you?" She asked. You looked to Yelena who let out a sigh, "what do you know Kate Bishop?" The Russian asked. You looked back at Kate waiting for her to answer.

"Well, after the team and I got out target, mind you, neither of you were around so thanks so much for the help" Kate started in a sarcastic tone, "I found the two of you drunk as balls in the VIP bar. Y/n, you were dancing on the bar while Yelena threw money at you, from what I heard you both shouted every bodies drinks. So I thought I would leave you both to it, which I did" Kate went on, a cheeky smile on her lips told you she knew more than she was telling. 

"Go on" you said. 

"It was around 4am when you both came banging on my door, stumbling over each other's feet, not making any sense of words but Yelena confidently announced that you both had just got hitched" 

"Oh god" Yelena mumbled under her breath. 

"So, it's true, it really happened" you said, running your left hand through your hair in distress. 

"I honestly couldn't be happier my two closet friends are married!" Kate replied happily causing both you and Yelena to give her an unimpressed look. "Wait, so when you came to my room early this morning, yo-"

"I just wanted to see how you pulled up" Kate interrupted, "and before you ask, no, you both didn't sleep together as far as I know anyway. I tried to get you both to go to bed in your own rooms but you insisted that we go to the rooftop hot tub where you both striped and I had to drag you both back to your room where Y/n passed out in the bed and it took you a another 20 minutes before you too were passed out" the brunette added, looking at Yelena. 

A moment of silence was shared, you couldn't believe the information Kate just had just shared and you made a promise to yourself that you would never drink that much Asgardian Ale ever again. "So, lunch, anybody hungry?" Kate asked with yet another cheeky smile. Yelena turned to you, "divorce after lunch my sweetheart?" She asked in a sarcastic tone. 

"Let's make it quick" you replied.

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[hyukalyptus]

hi hp!! did you know that orgasms could help reduce the feeling of menstrual cramps? 🤓

who among txt do you think would be most likely to… support you this way when you tell them you’re cramping :(

(totally not dealing with cramps right now nope 🤡)

- 🐳

hi!! omg im sorry its been a few days since u sent this in, hopefully ur feeling ok!

but omg! i wrote something about this on my old blog before it got permanently flagged. lemme see if i can find it~

ok..it was LONG long, so i cut it down~ shout out to @peachanonie for the thought in my inbox the first place :}

cw. periods, period sex, cunnilingus on period, period blood, everything about periods, sex toys, penetration (protection not mentioned), pet names (baby), TMI about my personal preferences lmfao.

peach: BEOMGYU!! i think he’d be a bit into bloodplay…. like the idea of it at least. but poor baby wouldn’t like the idea of hurting u like that so he’d never actually indulge cus it’s scary to him :( but! when he reads online somewhere that orgasms can be really good for periods… baby boy gets so curious

keeps reading and finds out ppl get extra sensitive when on their period too and he gets so 😳

at that point it’s just a matter of brining it up to u cus he’s a little shy when it comes to this stuff. tried to gently suggest it next time ur on ur period by hinting at it a bunch “did you know orgasms have a lot of benefits while on your period?” side eyeing you to see ur reaction LMAO he’s so cute.

but ofc ur not dumb and u see exactly what he’s doing… how cute he’d look while u tease him and make him feel small under u while u press kisses to his jaw and sweetly whisper how much you’d love to be pleasured by him if he wants to

as soon as he gets the okay, he’s practically jumping on you. starting at ur boobs and showing them LOTTTTSSSSS of love cus he knows how sensitive ur nipples get on ur period 🤭 wants to hear ur pretty noises so so bad so he doesn’t let up til he can’t take the excitement of eating u out ok ur period any longer.

makes sure everything is clean and prepared for a mess lol and then he GOES TO TOWNNNN. like i think as soon as he sees ur pretty pussy dripping with a mixture of period blood and arousal, he’d be fuckin floored and would dive straight for your clit (knowing it’ll pull the loudest moan out of u). and as soon as he actually TASTES you? instantly humping the bed. i think he’d cum in his pants quite quickly too 😭 poor baby just thinks u taste too good :( it’d turn him on so much. and with how hard you clench around his tongue, mixed with the taste of u in this state, i think he’d even maybe cum twice…… cus i know he’d be going at it for a looooooong time. just wanting to make u feel good and ease ur stress during this painful week :(

and when he finally lets up, he looks up at u with pretty little doe eyes, asking if u feel better and your heart just SWELLS at the sight of him. chin covered in ur release n blood, so so pretty for u….

already has a damp towel ready on the bedside table to clean u both up. and don’t expect him to fuck u after. no no no. all he wants is for you to gently stroke his cock while you lovingly make out, laying facing each other, til he whimpers into ur mouth that he’s cumming. pls pls PLS cuddle him to sleep, he wants to fall asleep with his head in ur chest :( and don’t even think abt getting dressed LOL u can wear underwear if u want cus ur on ur period but he will NOT allow you to get too hot in the night and ruin ur much needed sleep during such a stressful week for u! (it’s totally not because he wants to have a faceful of ur soft bare breasts to fall asleep to)

waking up the next morning to see a sleepy gyu with bed head and pajama pants laying out plates of pancakes for you both is honestly the best part.

service bf beomgyu is my weakness 😔

-🍑

me: ...peach. peach. PEACH. im in shambles. literally trying to think of anything to add lmao. but...this is soooo beomgyu.

i can totally see y'all sittin on the couch together and he's just scrollin thru his phone and ur just kinda groaning and he asks u what's up. you tell him ur on ur period and cramps are esp bad that day.

and he's like "...i read orgasms can kinda help w that..." and tries being as nonchalant as he can, but u catch on lmao. AND MAYBE! bc i see beomgyu's partner being a lil cheeky—you decide to tease him urself.

"oh ya? i think i heard that somewhere too..." nd u giggle just a bit, hopping off the couch, takin out ur tampon/cup lol, and returning w a lil vibrator. u bend over, ass toward him, slippin off ur pj shorts and he's just o.O then u plop back down, legs spread, spreadin ur lips a bit nd he sees u all wet and a bit bloody...speechless. u wanna tease urself, wanting his tongue to be the first thing that touches ur clit to get that "first touch" moan you know what i mean so u just switch it on, the sound of it alone makin u wet. and u kinda just rub it around your pussy for a bit, but he can't take his eyes off u.

"awe, jealous of my vibrator, baby?" and he just swallows and stutters a bit before he takes over and does everytHING

but i definitely need to write hcs for all of them!!!!!!!!! AAAAHHHH kicking nd squealing bc—my thing (TMI ALERT!!!) with period sex is i like penetration on my period. and i love seeing the bottom of my booty just barely covered in blood afterward. it literally makes me hnnggg. so just thinkin about yj takin someone from behind on their period, booty a lil bit red AH crying ><

[theemporium]

omg okay so I was reading your supernatural stuff w the F1 boys and I was like we don't talk about vampire!Lando very much, like just him being your best friend at the start and stuff and it's so fluffy (and smutty) like the dialogue in my head is like:

"Do vampires glitter in the sun, like you know, in Twilight?"

"No, we don't"

liKE IT HAS SO MUCH POTENTIAL.

- 🐳 anon

WE NEED TO BRING VAMPIRE!LANDO BACK PLEASE😭

okay but the fact you becomes best friends at first? like the boy is immortal and he’s bound to feel quite lonely and then in you come and you brighten his life a little

and then imagine him falling so hard and so fast but for a hundred-and-something vampire, he’s so bad at expressing his emotions

[hyunsvngs]

hmm 🧅s on high sex w 3racha? like they’re working on a new track in their studio w u smoking a cart/blunt n then all of a sudden ur making out w them? n then it sorta escalates bc everything feels soso good and ur senses are heightened. everything’s kinda fuzzy, n ur so cooked u cant even tell who’s dick your sucking, or who has their fingers in your pants, but it’s soo jfkfjf

-🐳 anon

oh boy this has been sitting in my inbox for a while because i've just been reading it over and over. 3racha stoners so have my heart.

the smoke has settled over the studio. it was meant to be a productive evening, but all plans of that dwindled when you were invited to visit - you always had weed, and you were always up to fuck with one of those three boys. they hadn't planned on working today. it was all a front. you'd arrived with one purpose.

jisung's head rolls onto your shoulder, his bucket hat falling backwards off of his head with the movement. he giggles regardless, nuzzling his cheek into the soft fabric of your t-shirt. "i'm so high."

changbin snickers. "you're always so high. what's the peak pinnacle of highness, jisung?"

jisung blinks. he raises his head off of your shoulder, pointing at changbin with one accusing finger. "that is such a good question." chan's red in the face with laughter. you are, too.

"not to be that person, but is anyone else horny?" you say, voice thick and cutting through the smoke in the room.

"i'm always horny," jisung chirps in response. you scoff, and then you turn to him. he really is. he's hard in his pants right now. "wanna make out?"

"obviously," you murmur, and then your lips are locking together. it always goes like this. it's you and jisung first, then you and changbin, and then you and chan. never any different. chan groans when he captures the sight of your tongues dancing over eachothers, jisung whining into the kiss.

"need you," he huffs, grabbing your thigh just a little too hard to drag you onto his lap. you let him anyway, straddling his slender hips with no protest. "need you since you walked in, you look so sexy."

"you do look sexy," chan contributes, and you giggle. "always look fuckin' sexy. you gonna let us fuck you, baby?"

"oh, absolutely," you grin, turning to face him. his eyes are dark, one eyebrow raised as though to proposition you - and you are one hundred percent agreeing.

it gets out of hand from then on. you don't know who's fingers creep into your joggers first, whether it's chan's or changbin's - jisung is typically way too impatient to touch you until you're naked. he claims he'll bust way too early. it's probably true.

you do know that it's changbin's cock you suck first, the thick yet shorter length pushing between your lips and you know that it's jisung who presses inside you first.

"there's a good girl," chan coos, his hand yanking your hair back. changbin reaches down, slapping his cockhead on your lips a few times for good measure. "gonna make me and my boys cum, aren't you?"

and, well, you had gone there with a purpose, after all.

[play-rough]

chuuya called dazai 'my baby' and now it's soooo hard to imagine a regressed baby otter being taken care of by anyone else who's not chuuya lol

like do you think chuuya will get jealous if he finds out that dazai regressed with someone else (at a time when chuuya was available and the regression isn't triggered by anything but dazai slips into it voluntarily)

(also turns out none of it actually happened and chuuya just saw something outta context and just assumed that he had to freaking share being his baby's caretaker)

~ 🐳

I love this ask sm and I have a really complicated answer lmao

So okay. Would Chuuya be jealous? Yes and no. Yes, because thats *Chuuya’s* baby. But also, in the 15 era, when Dazai regresses with someone else (i do eventually want to do a fic where Dazai has to be babysat), i think he would just be super bratty the entire time because he wants chuuya. And i think it would be hard for chuuya to feel jealous when he knows the baby spent the whole time crying for him.

But also. 22 era. Dazai doesn’t have access to his blockers, so he can’t keep himself from regressing like he used to. Kunikida steps in. Do I think Chuuya would be grateful that Dazai was so well taken care of? That he would be happy his baby had someone looking out for him while they were separated? Yes. Do I think Chuuya would feel jealous that someone else was able to get Dazai to regularly regress? Absolutely.